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sleeping-on-cracking-ice · 3 years

Note

Hello! Can you write something with female Y/N and Chishiya? She helped him with something and is injured after that. She fell or burn her back or hit her head, but pretends that nothing happened since she think he doesn't care and the injury it's getting worst by days, Chishiya didn't notice at first and he just don't understand why Y/N is not talking with him but lets it go, then the day of game comes and they both have to play and Y/N faints few hours before registration. He is panicking suddenly aware of his own feelings towards her and he is SO worried and feels guilty. I hope you can add a lot of angst but fluffy end? I'm sorry if this is messy, english is not my first language 😭 Thank you!

Of course! And don’t worry your English is great 😊 I hope you enjoy! ❤️

Panicked Confession | Shuntaro Chishiya

{Alice In Borderland Masterlist}

Character(s): Chishiya (ft. Kuina, Usagi, Ann, Hatter)

Summary: You get badly burnt while saving Chishiya in a game, but made sure he knew nothing about it. Just before leaving for the next game, you pass out and Chishiya finds you, causing him to panic

Warning: swearing, burn injury, vomiting, fainting

Word Count: 4.9k

*reader is female

“Shit! Guys come on!”

You, Chishiya, Kuina and Usagi rushed through the bottom floor of the building. Flames were curling in the air around each side of you, quickly closing in to eat you alive.

All four of you had almost completed the game, being the only players left after the last puzzle of the building. It was a diamond game, a game of intelligence. You were lucky to have been with Chishiya, as Diamonds games were his specialty.

You were all sprinting across the room, together in a tight pack so the flames don’t manage to touch you. You were panting, feeling your lungs collapsing in on themselves, but you had to press on. Only a few more steps before you could jump through the glass window at the end of the room, which was quickly being engulfed.

Suddenly, you saw Chishiya, who was running next to you, trip on a loose bit of debris laying on the ground inconveniently. You looked back and saw him holding his ankle in pain.

Of course, just your luck.

You all stopped abruptly, skidding along the floor and looking back to Chishiya in fear. He saw you all, his eyes widening.

“What are you doing?! Go!” he called out, wincing in pain.

You looked towards Kuina and Usagi, watching as thoughts spiraled around their heads to figure out what to do. The flame was too close behind Chishiya for it to be safe, if someone was to help him, they would have to risk their life doing so.

Both Kuina and Usagi shook their heads and looked away. They turned away from Chishiya and began jogging towards the window again. You froze. There’s no way they would just leave him like that.

“Guys!” You called out to them. They turned to you with fearful expressions painted on their face. “What are you doing?!” You asked, fear and worry dripping from your words. You had to make up your mind soon or you would be burned to a crisp.

Kuina motioned for you to come to her. “Y/N, there’s no time! We have to go!” you could tell she felt awful about this decision, but you weren’t giving up just yet.

You looked back at Chishiya laying on the ground. He was staring at you with a worried expression, wanting you to hurry up and leave him. You couldn’t leave a friend that easy to die. You had to at least try.

You let out a big sigh and lifted your aching legs to race towards Chishiya. He began yelling at you the moment you started running. “No, no, no! Go Y/N! What are you doing?!”

You ignored his shouting and quickly knelt down beside him to lift his arm around your shoulders. You weren’t going to lose anyone else, you promised yourself that after your friends died in the first game you played after appearing in the Borderlands.

Chishiya kept arguing and shaking his head as you tried to lift his body. He was surprisingly heavy for someone his size. “Y/N, go! There’s no time! You can’t save me!” he at screamed you, becoming more desperate with every plea.

You continued to ignore him and began dragging him along towards the window, where Kuina and Usagi were already working on breaking the glass with debris from around them. “You’re not going to off yourself that easily Chishiya as long as I have a say in it,” you rasped out, struggling to keep upright with the extra weight on your shoulders.

As your heart pounded in your ears and you felt the fire become hotter and hotter around you, you suddenly felt an incredibly sharp pain across your spine. The sensation spread all through your body, from your head to your toe, making you cry out and almost collapse to the ground, but you stayed strong.

Chishiya had given up arguing with you, using his good leg to take a bit of his body weight off your pained shoulders. With his help, you managed to move much quicker, limping and staggering your way towards Kuina and Usagi, who had broken the window and were now waiting for you to come, yelling at you to hurry up.

You didn’t look back; you didn’t want to see how close the flames were. You knew it would do nothing but make the situation worse.

As you neared the window, you slowed down as Kuina ran out to help you lift Chishiya up and out of the window. You were relying completely on adrenaline at that point, having lost all of your strength through running and carrying Chishiya.

You managed to lift yourself through the cracked window, earning a few cuts from the leftover glass on the way, and collapsed onto the grass ground below you. A large barrier from inside the room (probably manufactured for the games) closed over the destroyed window as you fell, being lucky to be the last out of the four of you to escape. The flames were locked in, unable to harm you.

The four of you laid on the grass, panting and trying to regain your breath. As your adrenaline calmed down, the pain of your large burn mark set in. You covered your face with your hand and silently screamed against it, trying to drown out the searing pain somehow. You couldn’t worry the others, not after what just happened.

**************

The next couple of days was nothing but a struggle for you. As soon as you arrived back from the game, you stumbled your way to Ann’s medical room. She took a closer look at your burn wound, applying whatever she had to try and reduce the chance of it getting infected. But unfortunately, that didn’t reduce the pain.

After allowing Ann to wrap a bandage around your upper back to protect the wound, you slowly made your way back to your room on the upper floor. You didn’t want to rush yourself in case you made your wound worse, so you took your time in getting there.

Unfortunately, it was a bit too much time, as you managed to bump into Chishiya who popped out from around the corner. A small panic raised within you; you didn’t want Chishiya to see you like this! It’s embarrassing enough to like someone you had no chance with, but for them to see you stumbling and holding onto the wall because you can’t even keep yourself up? No, not today.

You stood more upright than before, giving Chishiya your best fake smile. “Hey Y/N,” he said, walking past you. You breathed a sigh of relief. Well, that wasn’t too bad.

You started to walk again before you heard Chishiya call out from behind you. “Oh, wait Y/N!”

You turned around, biting your tongue so you didn’t let out a yelp of pain as the skin on your back twisted with your movements. “Yeah?” you acknowledged him.

He gave you a half-hearted smile. “Thanks again, for earlier. I would’ve been a goner if you hadn’t risked your life like that for me,” he said, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. You’ve never seen him thank someone before, so you were shocked.

“Oh, it was no big deal! We should all help each other out, considering we haven’t really got anything else other than each other,” you said, smiling happily. You felt all giddy from him acknowledging the fact that you risked yourself for him.

“Yeah, but it was still pretty cool of you. Even Kuina and Usagi were willing to leave me there,” he chuckled as his own joke.

You laughed and shook your head at him. “I’m sure they were just doing what they thought was best for everyone else in the moment.”

Chishiya nodded and gave you a small wave. “I’ll see you tomorrow night then! Hatter let me know in the meeting this evening that you and I are together again. I’m glad though, because you seem to have the skill and brains to get through some tough games.”

You were flattered by his compliment. “Thanks, you too though! We would have burnt to a crisp if it weren’t for you during that diamond game tonight.”

The small talk was killing you. You just wanted to get back to your room and wallow in the silence that engulfed it. At least there, you could suffer from your burn wound a little louder than out in the public eye of The Beach.

Chishiya laughed at your statement. “No, I’m sure with you there it would’ve been fine,” he said back, making you smile wider.

“I’ll see you later then,” you exclaimed, waving a hand at him. He waved back with a grin on his attractive features before he turned around and continued down the hall with his hands tucked into their usual spot in his hoodie pockets.

You let out a big sigh of relief. That was close. You felt the pain seeping through your body the longer you stood there, hoping for Chishiya to just end the conversation. You felt guilty, it may have looked like you were trying to escape, since you were slowly backing towards the corner. Hopefully, he didn’t notice.

You stumbled the rest of the way towards your room, wincing and hissing in pain on the way. It felt like Ann didn’t do anything at all, but you couldn’t blame her. She had extremely limited resources and could only leave to search for more every few weeks.

When you finally made it to the door of your room, the familiar number engraved onto the middle of it, you gripped the handle and walked inside.

You collapsed onto your bed onto your stomach. There was no way you would be able to sleep on your back with this kind of pain, so you had to resort to either on your side or on your stomach.

Let’s just say, you had a restless sleep.

****************

You were hoping after a night’s sleep that the pain from your back would have disappeared at least a little bit. But you couldn’t have been more wrong. If anything, it had become worse. You probably managed to roll onto it a few times during the night, reopening any part of the wound that had sealed up over the time you’ve had it.

It took you far too long to get out of bed in the morning. You groaned and moaned in frustration as you crawled your way out of the duvet, almost collapsing off your bed. You felt rather pathetic, but who wouldn’t after not being able to do the simplest of tasks from a wound.

As you were walking to your closet to look for something to wear, you remembered you had to go see Ann again that morning. She had told you last night to return to her medical room the next morning so she could reapply a new bandage onto you, in case the other one gets bacteria or blood on it during the night somehow.

You quickly put on your usual swimmers to wear around the hotel and the black hoodie that you wore most of the time when you got cold. You didn’t want to risk anyone else seeing your wound. The gaping burn mark across your upper back was bound to attract unwanted attention.

You made your way down the hall to go see Ann again. There was nobody in the halls around the rooms due to it being close to noon. You slept in longer than you expected.

You slowly walked down the couple of flights of stairs, making your way to Ann’s medical room on the lower floor. The walk down to the lobby felt longer at that moment than it ever had.

You approached the door with the red cross along the front of it, indicating the medical room. You were about to lift your hand to turn the doorknob before you heard a loud voice yell from further down the corridor.

You shifted your eyes and saw none other than Chishiya striding down the hallway with his usual cocky smirk painted across his face. Of course, you had to run into him out of all people.

“Y/N! Wait!” he yelled as he jogged up to you.

You stayed silent, waiting to hear what he had to say. You wanted to ignore him and just walk into the medical room to see Ann to avoid any kind of questioning or suspicion from him, but you knew that would only make him more curious.

“Hey, you alright?” he frowned, questioning you. He reached out to place a gentle hand on your forearm, but you flinched away before he could touch you.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you answered, trying to sound normal. The piercing feeling that your wound brought you began to make its way around your body again, making you slightly shift and shake. ‘Of course, it just has its moment while I’m talking to the one person that I don’t want to look like a weakling in front of,’ you thought to yourself in your head.

Chishiya frowned at your flinch, but seemed to shake it off quickly, moving onto something else. “So anyway, where were you this morning?” he asked, leaning closer to you.

“I-I was in my room. I had a late sleep in,” you said, gripping the doorknob to the medical room.

“Oh, weird. Do you remember what we talked about yesterday?” he said with a smirk on his face.

‘Oh shit, he’s mocking my bad memory,” you thought, feeling embarrassed.

“Um… no? Should I?”

“You, Kuina, Alice, Usagi and I were going to meet up this morning to steal some food from the kitchen and take it to the rooftop. You didn’t show up near the pool where we said we were going to meet!” he exclaimed. He was laughing, obviously not caring too much about your forgetfulness.

You thought for a second. You did recall having that conversation. You guessed that you forgot about it because you were so focused on trying to reduce the pain from your burn. Even if you did remember, as if you would’ve been able to run away from the chefs in the kitchen after taking the food with this injury.

“Me and Kuina even knocked on your door. You must have been really knocked out if you didn’t wake up from Kuina’s loud yelling.”

He then raised his eyebrow and smirked. “Unless you were hiding from me?”

Your could tell he was obviously joking, but he wasn’t far off from being right. That has been your intention since last night, but trust Chishiya to figure you out quickly enough.

You heart rate picked up from his accurate accusation. “Uh, sorry Chishiya, but I really have to go,” you mumbled out, giving him a quick fake smile before walking into the medical room and closing the door behind you.

Chishiya’s mischievous smirk fell from his face. You didn’t even give him a chance to say goodbye, and you seemed oddly nervous from his accusation that you were avoiding him. He felt somewhat hurt. Were you trying to avoid him?

He shook off his suspicions and continued down the corridor to the lobby to find something to entertain him for the meantime. You wouldn’t try to avoid him, would you? Perhaps he’ll confront you about it later.

*************

You were laying in your room reading a book when you heard the usual ring of the bell that was Hatter’s signal for everyone to move down to the lobby to prepare for the night’s games.

“Shit! Is it that late already?” you asked no one, glancing over at the digital clock on your nightstand.

You panicked and saw it was the time that you would head out to games. You said to yourself earlier that you would give yourself an early mark so you could get down there at the right time, considering you would be slow due to your condition, but you got distracted by your book and lost track of time.

You rushed to your feet a little too quickly for your body’s liking, causing the pain of your wound to shoot across your back without mercy, making you yelp in pain and fall forwards.

You managed to catch yourself before you face planted into the ground. You let out a few deep breaths, trying to regain your strength while the piercing pain became worse from your insistence.

You pushed yourself off the ground, placing your foot underneath you and attempting to stand to your feet. You had to make it to the cars at least, you knew if anyone found you at The Beach during game time, they would mark you a coward, or worse: a traitor.

You cursed under your breath and let out pained sobs as you tried to get to your feet again. But unfortunately, your body just wasn’t on your side at that moment.

Your feet gave out underneath you and your head pounded, causing you to feel dizzy and suddenly nauseated. You leant forwards as you emptied the contents of your stomach out onto the floor, gagging on the taste of it in the back of your throat.

Your eyes began to feel heavy, not being able to take the pain and stress you were under. You managed to roll yourself to the side so you wouldn’t land in the pile of vomit and lay yourself across the floor safely before you face planted.

“Fuck,” you rasped out, feeling helpless at that moment.

You couldn’t do anything as your vision narrowed, passing out from pain on the floor of your own room, no one around to help you.

*************

“Hello again everyone! I would like to say a few words before we all get into our groups and drive to our games!”

Hatter’s usual booming voice thrusted across the crowd in front of him. Another night, another gathering. Just like every other day.

Chishiya stood at his usual spot in the back, leaning against the cement wall and rolling his eyes at Hatter’s words. He never seemed to have anything useful to say. Just some preachy words that created false hope.

‘How about for a change, he gave us some advice? It would probably spare some people a few headaches,’ Chishiya thought to himself.

He stood on his toes and tried to search the crowd for the top of your head. He was becoming anxious. You would usually be down in the lobby by now.

He was more nervous due to the way you’ve been acting all day. Usually, you two were joined at the hip twenty-four seven, but the only time he saw you that day was in the morning when you walked into the medical room.

He wondered why you were going in there. You never went to Ann unless it was for something drastic, but you seemed completely healthy and unharmed.

As the time ticked on, Chishiya became more and more worried. You would never skip out on a game; you were too afraid of being caught by the executives for that.

Hatter finished off his nightly speech with the list of groups and which number wristbands go where. Chishiya didn’t even care to pay attention as everyone began making their way towards the entrance of the hotel where they would pile into the cars and drive off to the games. He ran the opposite way, clambering up the flights of stairs to reach the level your room is on. If you had to be anywhere, it would be there.

He powered his legs into a sprint, having to brush his white locks out of his face once or twice due to them getting in the way. He eventually arrived at your room, stopping and panting to regain his breath.

He knocked on your door quietly at first, not knowing if you were asleep or something. “Y/N?” he called out through the door. “We need to head off to the games. Did you not hear the bell?”

When he received nothing but silence as an answer, he took it upon himself to walk in to see if you were there. He opened the door and peeked his head around the side, being careful in case you were indecent for some reason.

As he walked in further, his heart dropped as he saw you laying on the ground passed out.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, rushing over to your body and kneeling beside you. He lifted your head onto his lap gently and immediately checked your neck for a pulse. A small feeling of relief flowed through him when he felt the beat of your heart on his fingers.

“Oh my god Y/N, what’s happened to you?” he stressed, tapping your cheek with his hand to see if you would wake. He was beginning to become more worried as time ticked on. He glanced over at the clock on your nightstand and saw that it was getting later. He had to wake you up before registration closed for all the games.

He lifted you up from under your arms, using all his strength to pull you into your small bathroom. He placed you gently on the tiled floor, stuffing a towel underneath your head for support. He quickly shifted your body around, trying to look for any source of injury that caused you to pass out. He froze when he noticed a few stains of blood on the back of your hoodie. He quickly lifted the hem of your shirt to see what was causing the stains.

His eyes almost popped out of his head from the sight. He gasped at the huge burn wound on your back, stretching across from your shoulder blades to your waist. The bandage that Ann had wrapped around it had come loose, hanging off your abdomen carelessly. His heart filled with guilt as he examined it more closely. Why didn’t he look after you?

He immediately put two and two together and realized that you had probably passed out from the pain of the burn mark.

He stood up from his position on the floor and grabbed a small cloth from your towel rack, running it under the water from the tap. He knelt back down next to you and carefully placed the wet fabric against your wound. He was so afraid of hurting you, but he had to do what he could to make you better for the game.

“Oh, come on, please wake up Y/N,” he breathed out. Stress and anxiety filled his tone, making the air more tense.

“Please wake up, please be okay. I love you, please don’t die Y/N,” he suddenly felt small tears gathering in his eyes as he stood up quickly to refresh the cloth that he was using to clean the burn.

He felt his hidden feelings begin to pour out of his mouth. He couldn’t handle the strain seeing you like this was having on his emotions.

He brought the cloth back, but this time he turned you over slightly so he could place it on your face. Your eyes were still shut tightly, not showing any indication of opening.

Chishiya ran the fingers of his other hand along your cheek, tapping softly on your skin, hoping that you would wake up from the physical contact. He felt desperate. He has never felt this helpless before, not even in games.

He allowed his few tears to fall down his cheek, lifting your head and pressing his forehead against yours. “Please wake up, we have to go. Just wake up and I’ll take care of you,” he mumbled out with shaky breaths.

He didn’t know what else to do. He could do nothing but hope.

A few minutes passed with Chishiya just holding you and pressing the cold cloth onto your face, trying to make you open your eyes. And eventually you did.

Chishiya breathed in a huge sigh of relief when he saw your eyes flutter open slowly, dazed and confused. He smiled and kept the cloth pressed to your face, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Oh, thank god,” he breathed out, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and bringing you into his chest for a close hug. You groaned loudly at the contact as Chishiya accidentally placed his hand on your wound.

“Chishiya, be careful,” you rasped out against his chest. He flinched away immediately and apologized.

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up,” he said, lifting you up under your arms again. You groaned, not being able to stand up on your own yet. Chishiya kept you close to his chest as you leant against him.

He managed to clean you up with you leaning most of your body weight on him. He helped you wash out your mouth and clean your teeth to get rid of the taste of vomit and reapplied the bandage that had fallen off your wound. He did it all with such care and concern, being afraid of hurting you or overwhelming you with anything.

“Aren’t you supposed to be at the games?” you asked after you had finished rinsing your face.

“I noticed you weren’t at the lobby when Hatter called everyone, so I ran to your room and found you,” he answered, fixing your hoodie on your back from when he had to lift it to clean your injury.

“So, everyone’s gone?” you asked with a worried expression. Chishiya nodded, leaning on the sink next to you to check your face to see if you were alright.

“But if they find us, they’ll mark us as traitors!” you exclaimed, fear filling your head.

Chishiya placed his index finger on your lips to shush you. “Shh, only if they can hear us. We can just stay in here and be quiet, and hopefully no one suspects that we’re missing,” he said, smiling to calm you down.

You searched his eyes for any uncertainty but chose to let it go and just listen to him. “Okay.”

You both sat side by side on the floor of your small bathroom, Chishiya running his hand up and down your arm to keep your anxiety away. After a while of comfortable silence, you spoke up.

“Thanks, Chishiya, for helping me. If it weren’t for you, I’d still be lying on the ground next to a pile of my own puke,” you laughed at yourself.

Chishiya giggled. “It’s okay. I care about you Y/N, I couldn’t just leave you there.”

You looked at him with sparkling eyes, being taken back by his statement. “Really?” you asked, not believing him.

He smiled lovingly and caressed your cheek with his fingers. “Of course, I’d do anything if it was to help you.”

You thought you would have a cute moment together, but that flew out the window when Chishiya slapped you lightly across the cheek. Not enough to hurt you, but enough to bring a shocked expression onto your face.

“But next time, tell me when you’re hurt instead of trying to hide it from me like an idiot! You really think you’d be able to hide something like this from me?” he scolded you like a mother, but you giggled at his reaction.

“Yeah, I’ll tell you next time. Why did I ever think I could keep something from someone with an intelligent mind like yours,” you teased, leaning closer to his face.

Chishiya raised his eyebrows. “Hm, thanks, I guess? Not sure if that was a compliment or if you’re poking fun at me.”

You chuckled. “Take it however you want,” you whispered. You finally closed to space between you, allowing your lips to clash against his. Chishiya let out a shocked sound, but quickly melted against you and accepted your kiss.

You both sat on the floor of your bathroom, moving your mouths together while Chishiya tried hard to place his hands on you without touching your burn mark. You appreciated his care, but he ended up having to awkwardly place them on your upper arms, rubbing up and down them slowly.

You pulled away first, making Chishiya chase your lips as you moved away, making you giggle. “There’s my thank you gift,” you said cheekily, leaning away from him and back into your seating position.

Chishiya pouted at you. “That’s it? That was barely a kiss!” he argued, trying to move closer to you, wanting more of your affection.

“Chishiya, your tongue was in my mouth. I think that clarifies as a kiss,” you stated, placing your hand on his mouth and pushing him away gently. “Maybe let down that tough guy persona more often and take care of me, maybe then you’ll get more kisses.”

Chishiya leaned back and frowned. “Fine, but don’t expect this to be the norm now. I’m not going to let you control my personality just for a bit of affection.”

Well, that was a lie.

Author’s Note: Every Chishiya fanfic I’ve written has had some sort of angsty moment in it 😂 this man is going through it

3K notes · View notes

niksfics · 3 years

Text

↬ FATE

↬ PAIRINGS: kenma x f!reader (side aka rebound mention) miya atsumu x f!reader

↬ WARNINGS: a whole lotta angst, breakup, it’s an online relationship, kenma is cold and hurts ur feelings

↬ SUMMARY: your relationship with kenma really had felt like the last one. He was it, turns out he didn’t have similar feelings.

↬ A/N: alright loves!! This isn’t proofread at all it’s 2 in the morning I’ll edit when I wake up, butttt Thanks to my lovely ex girlfriend you are now being graced with this steaming pile of trash. (Lovely was not meant sarcastically at all she is in fact very lovely.) Ngl almost, if not all of this story is about my relationship with my ex gf. This is how I cope people. ￫ It’s taken me awhile to actually be able to right something that’s why things kinda stopped. Tbh after she broke up with me it’s been very hard for me to write so hopefully this helps! And I hope you enjoy!! I would also just like to say if it feels a lil weird it’s cause these are things I’ve actually written in my notes I tweaked it a little to fit the story but it’s straight from the source 😩

WC | 2.5K

You sighed as you opened your notes app. Your eyes scanning over all of the little facts and quirks he had told you about himself. All the stuff you’d wanted to remember. The stuff that had seemed so important to you before. Now it was meaningless, almost like facts about a stranger. Almost as if you hadn’t spent four months learning about and growing with eachother.

You scrolled down a little bit right under, how his favorite marvel character is Spider-Man and you chewed on your lip. Your fingers hovering above the keyboard on your phone. You looked over the facts again. The things he dislikes and the stuff he adores, the things he likes to collect to the way he feels passionately about a certain topic. You begin to type.

Friday June 25th 2022 12:22 Am

I cried again tonight, because I still love you. It’s been a month and six days since we broke up. It feels like there’s a hole in my chest. You seem to be doing fine though, so I’m happy for you! This is the second time since we’ve broken up that I’ve felt actual physical emotional pain in my chest. Remember when I told you how bad it hurt after we broke up? Remember how you didn’t even ask if I was ok? Didn’t even bother to answer. Do you remember that? I remember. I’ve thought about it every day since. I remember it being so bad I genuinely thought I was having a heart attack. Wasn’t until I’d called tetsu crying that he’d told me it was just emotional and I should probably try to relax.

I read through our old messages. I’ve never wanted something back so bad. Never wanted to beg anyone to stay till now. I wish you loved me like I love you. I wish I hadn’t grown so attached, wish I hadn’t fallen so deeply into love with you. I wish it wasn’t my fault that we broke up. I wish I wasn’t so fucking scared. I wish I was fearless. Wish I could rise into love bravely. I wish I was brave when it came to you. I keep telling myself it was me. It was me not you. You didn’t love me anymore. You don’t love me anymore and you’re just too nice to say that. So you told me in the only way I could handle. Except you hadn’t used the words you should have. You got bored. We both know it’s true. You were bored of it, and I don’t blame you. I know we’ll never talk again, and part of me is so glad. Another part of me forces myself to read through all our messages though. I wish I could just tell you one last time. I love you.

You sighed saving it before closing out of it. Tears you hadn’t known were falling finally became known to you as they streamed down your cheeks. Your eyes puffy as you wet your lips, the salt of them coating your tongue. You were bitter and so were your tears. I briefly wondered what he was doing right now. Probably playing a video game. You knew his schedule all to well by now. Probably testing out a new game for his stream.

A new set of fresh tears fell as you remembered how you used to call him right before he went on. Being lulled to sleep by his occasionally curses and the clicking oh his controller or his keyboard.

You never expected things to end this way. You really thought he was the last one. Yes it had only been four months, but the way he made you feel. The way that it had felt. It had felt final, and you’d been friends before you even started dating.

You sniffle moving yourself to the kitchen to poor yourself a glass of water as you remembered how nervous you were when you first texted him. You had acumulated quite the crush on him back in high school. As Inarazaki’s manager you were required to go to the games, and even after your team lost you had stuck around. Watched him play and cheered him on. Two weeks later you had begun to text, as friends of course. It wasn’t until four months ago that you’d gotten together.

Your anniversary was only two days prior to your break up. You both had never been one to even care about that stuff. You had agreed early on in the relationship that we wouldn’t do anything due to the distance, and the business of our schedules. You were never one for remembering things like anniversaries anyways.

He really did feel like the one. Sometimes you just know. Sometimes you can just feel it. Like, you know that feeling you get when you know something is off or you know for sure something is about to happen even without being told it’s going to. That’s what it felt like to be with kozume kenma.

You thought you knew, you thought this time, this time its for real. You thought it was finally safe to say, that he was the one. You both had even admitted to looking for each others initials in those stupid soulmate tik tok videos.

You were finally in a mature relationship with someone you could talk about anything to. You had gotten so caught up in it, that you didn’t even see the end creeping up on you.

↝

You’d finally gained the courage to text him again. Unfortunately it was in a drunken daze. Your hands shaking as you fumbled with your phone typing things you’d come to regret in the morning. You’d sent him a series of texts telling him how much you missed him, how you didn’t understand how he was so okay. You had been a wreck that night. One of your friends puking in her toilet as you cried. You were happy of course that he was doing so well, but you’d been a wreck for so long and he hadn’t even changed. You told him you wished you could be okay.

When you’d awoken the next morning hair knotted in a complete mess and wiping drool from your chin your heart had sunk even lower. His response was cold. You knew that kenma could be cold. You knew that it was just who he was, but this particular text had felt so unfeeling and unfamiliar, it was as if he hadn’t even sent it himself. He had only ever talked like this to you once and that was when you first became friends all those years ago.

Kozume ❤️

Hey, it’s okay. And yeah you see what I choose to put up. I could be better. But I choose to stay optimistic and busy. Sorry that things are this way.

You had never seen so many periods in a text before. He only used grammar like that when he was peeved, and maybe you were wrong, maybe he’d done that on purpose, but it had hurt so bad. It had caused an ache so deep in your chest that you weren’t sure if you’d ever even dated him at all.

Yeah.

It was the only thing you could bring yourself to respond back with. How were you supposed to respond to that? You’d stared at it for so long and after you’d sent it you wished you had said more. Wished you would’ve said something more insightful than a simple, heartbroken, “yeah.”

Not too long later there was another ping and you held your breath. His name briefly appearing across your screen.

Yeah. I could be better. But I hope you do well soon. I’m sorry that I can’t really do much to help out

And of course you did the only thing you could do. Deflect. Pretend like you hadn’t said what you’d said not even fourteen hours ago.

No it’s fine. I’m fine. You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry that you could be doing better.

He left you on seen. You knew you sounded like an asshole. At least to you, you felt like an asshole. Why couldn’t you have come up with something else. Why couldn’t you tell him the truth. Tell him how you felt. Tell him that you didn’t think you should be broken up anymore. That the month long cruel joke was over and you were ready to spend your nights falling asleep to him playing video games again. You didn’t though, and you never would. You’re not brave enough, too prideful to even try.

You swallowed down the bile rising in your throat as you realized even if you did beg him. Begged him to take you back. Tell him that you still love him. You were too late, and you just couldn’t be selfish when it comes to him. He is over you and it was so plainly obvious. You know that deep down. Know that he’s moved on, and it kills you inside. So you did the only thing you could do. Try and put it into words.

So as you lay in bed the warm body you let occupy your space sound asleep beside you, his toned blonde hair tousled slightly and you sighed. Finally away from the shenanigans of your friends you took a deep breath before you closed your eyes.

You opened up your notes app again and scrolled past the last entry. You swallowed again as you blinked the tears out of your eyes. Your thumbs beginning to move before you even gave them permission.

Wednesday June 30th 2022 1:39 Am

Here I am again. Stuck. Stuck in the same place I’ve been for so long. You know, I write so beautifully when I’m broken. I’m most of my best work is written when I’m being torn apart. But I just, I can’t seem to find the words. I can’t seem to put it into a document and turn out little story into a different story to cope. Can’t seem to write it out. Can’t seem to move on.

I hovered over the unfollow button on your page today, to keep myself from scrolling through your things again. To keep myself from getting hurt. So I don’t have to be reminded. I want to delete it. Delete where we officially met. On a chat through my screen. I wanna wipe the messages clean. And I’ve tried. Oh how I’ve tried. But I can’t.

I want to delete our conversations. The hours long talks we had, but then, what happens afterwards? What keeps the memories alive. I’d never been so in love with someone before. I’ve never actually…. Been in love before. I thought I’d been in love, but it didn’t feel like that, and losing them never hurt like this. Losing someone has never hurt this bad before.

I’ve never felt the emptiness you left so deep in my very being with anyone I’ve ever met before. I can’t seem to pull myself together. And it’s pathetic I know. It’s pathetic that I’m still here. In the same place I was a month ago. It’s about to be two months we’ve haven’t been together. I’m hurting. Hurting so bad. It’s painful to look at you.

I haven’t deleted the photos even though I probably should. They’re still tucked away in an album in my camera roll labeled “us <3” the one one I made specially just for you. The way I’d been so excited when I was finally ready to tell my friends. I even have this stupid notes folder from when we were dating where I wrote all the little things about you that I never wanted to forget. I find you so endearing. Everything you do. I just couldn’t help but right it down to keep it safe so it never leaves my mind. So that I never forget. But now, forgetting is all I want to do.

I never thought there’d be a time in my life where I was more emotionally stunted that I normally. So stunted I can’t even put this, our split up, into words. Make it something entertaining for somebody else to read. Write a book about it. My publicist keeps asking when the sequel for my book will be done. I don’t know if it’ll ever be finished. I can’t do the one thing I’ve always been good at. I’m crying as I write this.

And I wish it would just end here in this little notes app. Wish the love would die in here. I always think I’m over you and then I see you again, and nowadays your everywhere. A very big hit and I’m happy for you and your success, but seeing you makes my heart squeeze in my chest.

I think I’m over you until I play that stupid fucking game that causes me to scream at my phone, or my laptop in frustration, but I just can’t seem to delete it because I know it’s something that you love. That show we used to talk about. I know you know which one, I can’t seem to watch it without thinking of what was. You’ve ruined it forever cause now it only reminds me of you. I know you’ll never see this, but I like to imagine you can. That my time for closure has somehow come.

When you told me you were sorry that things were this way, it was a real slap in the face. It stopped my false hope. My wishing. It all came to a halt. I’m glad. Glad that you’re happier. That you’re better without me. But god, now I’m so fucked up and I can’t even talk to you.

You were the only person I had left. The only one who understood me. And now you’re gone. You took a part of me with you that night. A part that I’ll never get back. I should’ve known that you would leave. I’ve never been able to get someone to stay for longer than three to four months.

I thought I could let my guard down though. I thought we were in the clear. I’d thought finally. Finally someone is gonna stay. I thought you were my person. I still think that to this day. I thought we were gonna make it. And now I’m with this guy I don’t even like. He’s not you, he doesn’t act like you. He doesn’t like video games like you do.

He doesn’t talk to me like you do. Like you did. But you know how it ended I don’t need to put it here. Unfortunately I’ll always love you even if you don’t love me. This is so scattered, I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy.

With that you closed the app and put down your phone. Plugging in it and as it dinged miya atsumu rolled over in his sleep. He reached for you his hands wrapping around your waist to tug you against his strong body.

His gravely voice whispering through sleep, “mmm finally decided to come to bed?” You hum moving an arm under on of his to wrap around his thin waist. “Mhm, thought you might need the company.” You began to draw little shapes and letters against his back as he chuckled, “oh yea? How thoughtful of you princess.”

Suddenly it was quiet and your closed eyes opened to his wide brown ones, his eyebrows furrowing .

“Did you just spell kozume on my back?”

154 notes · View notes

hotdamnhunnam · 3 years

Text

Filthy Fucking Pet

A/N: Here’s the next requested fic from my Dirty Little Secret – Super Kinky List! In which Jax Teller owns and abuses you like an actual animal… this shit is mad intense lol and Jax is an absolute alpha male asshole. **Please note the warnings: This fic is all about the kinks, please do not read if this is not your thing!!**

Pairing: Jax Teller x F!Reader Warnings: smut, swearing, dom!Jax, extreme degradation/dehumanization (master/pet kink, sweat kink, foot worship, ass worship, Jax humiliates you to the max, realistically this is not at all a healthy relationship) Request: This Dirty Little Secret request (anon)

Word Count: ~2.6k

**Please note warnings above**

Triggering content after ‘Keep reading’ cut…

Seriously, this shit is super savage and sick and twisted. You’re basically Jax Teller’s personal house pet. In addition to kinky stuff like rimming and the general vibe of extreme submission, this is also the first fic I’ve posted on tumblr that features foot worshiping (I swear I have no interest in feet irl really – as with pretty much all of the kinks in my kinkiest fics honestly, it’s just a theoretical fantasy that I have only for Charlie, and only in theory… since theoretically I have no limits with my sex god king…)

Anywhore, enough ado about nothing! 🙃 All of the kinks in this fic are mentioned in the above warnings, so please just be mindful of them before you jump in…

***************

You used to be human. But now... it feels as if you've never been.

From the day you and Jackson first met, way back when, you had fallen in love with the crown prince. Fallen to your knees to serve him as his bitch and that's all you have been ever since. Pleasing him is your business. You're his little whore, and his personal pet: nothing more, nothing less.

Anything but human honestly. You're whatever Jax Teller wants you to be. His kinky sex kitten, his filthy fuckpig, or his damn dirty dog on a leash. It's the best. You don't speak, you don't eat—not human food, at least—you just serve at his feet. This is your whole existence. And God, you feel so fucking blessed.

You spend all your days in his house, day in and day out. The castle of the king of Charming. It's such a gift just to live under the same roof as him. Whenever he's not home, you miss him so badly it hurts. But you keep yourself busy by doing the housework. Constantly crawling on all fours, you use your grubby paws to scrub the floor, and sweep the dust off of his furniture.

Then once you're done with all your chores, you kneel down by the front door, and wait desperately for your master. Just counting the seconds until he returns.

Every time that it happens, the moment you hear the smooth roar of the engine as his bike gets in... then his powerful footsteps approaching the entrance... your heart starts to beat harder, faster. On fire in the presence of Jax. There is always a butt plug stuck deep in your ass, with a big fluffy fake tail attached. You're otherwise naked except for your collar and tags.

And today, as your master comes home after quite a long time far away, you are happier than you can take—your whole body quivers and quakes, and your tail starts to wag.

When Jax finally walks in, you gaze up at him with wide, worshipful eyes. He's so damn beautiful you could cry. You yelp and whimper a few times in greeting, to express how excited you are to be seeing your king. By now your human brain has certainly stopped working. Your hungry tongue hangs from your open mouth, breathing needy and loud, as subhuman growls and thick gobs of drool keep spilling out.

He smiles down at you as he enters, worn out from a long day of being Jax Teller, the baddest motherfucker ever. He must be exhausted, no doubt.

But still his gorgeous grin is big and genuine, bright as the sun, his slicked hair such a brilliant blonde, eyes as deep and as blue as the ocean. Clearly pleased at the sight of your tail-wagging motion, a signal of your pure devotion.

"Happy to see me?" he teases playfully, as if he has to ask. Typical Jax.

You nod gleefully in response to that. Your perfect master reaches down to pat your head, stroking your hair now as you purr for him, showing how much you adore him, as his faithful little pet.

"That's a good slut," he coos. "Go on, you know what to do."

Lowering your face to the ground, as ever eager to go down, upon those words he speaks, you hurry to remove his shoes. Those famously white sneaks. Then tug his socks off with your teeth—damp with a long day's worth of sweat, getting you drunk on his intoxicating scent, the pure essence of Jackson—then press sloppy kisses all over his beautiful feet. Servicing him like this is everything you need.

Ugh, you've missed him so much... full of love and submission, arousal dripping from your crotch, you stuff his socks into your mouth both at once, then lift your face off of the floor and sit back on your heels in your usual kneeling position. Your paws are propped under your chin as you blink up at him. He knows just what you want.

"Look at you, cunt. You wanna play fetch?" he says, chuckling as you bob your dumb head eagerly up and down. It's so much fun when he rolls his sweaty socks into a ball and throws it all over the house, for you to chase around. Playing that game is such a privilege. "Hmm, I would... but I'm not in the mood. Master's too fucking tired. Too bad for you, bitch."

Aw. Too bad indeed. Wallowing in self-pity, you pout and hang your head in a deep bow, but you know better than to plead. He turns to walk away now, and you follow at his feet. Crawling as you are it's always hard to keep up with his speed.

He's yawning by the time you reach the master bedroom. Some nights he has more energy when he gets home. Sometimes he'd slam you up against the wall and fuck you hard in every hole, wild and savage as an animal, filling you with his thick creamy cum, so deliciously full...

Apparently not tonight, though. You can't blame him, you know. You can't blame Jackson Teller for any damn thing, to be honest. Of course not. Because he is your fucking king. Whatever he does, he's your master, your god; everything about his whole existence is flawless.

You watch in rapture as he strips naked, carelessly flinging his kutte and the rest of his clothes to the floor, and flops facedown in bed to lay his weary head to rest. Fit for the king he is, his bed is big and plush and luxurious. At this late hour, he's too tired to even bother with a shower, you notice. Fuck yes—that's how you like it best.

Hopefully he'll let you use your tongue to clean up all his glorious sweat. Then whenever he leaves next to take care of business, you'll still get to savor his scent in his absence, inhaling it off of the sheets and the mattress. Your thirsty mouth is watering just at the thought of it, as you scurry all over the bedroom to clean up his mess.

Gathering up all the clothes that he scattered, you can't help but take a deep breath. Inhaling the essence of this sinfully sexy bastard.

You indulge in a whiff, as you slobber and sniff—focusing on the pits of his shirt so damp and sweaty it's obscene, and the rich-smelling crotch of his jeans, soaking up all the musk of his cock and his balls and his ass which smells so good it hurts—and especially his underwear... before dutifully dropping them into the hamper, along with the socks that you brought from downstairs. Though you hate washing Jax's sweet scent off of anything, one of your chores, of course, is to take care of all the laundry for your master.

"Get over here, bitch. You should clean up after me faster," he scolds, dominant voice husky and low, somewhat muffled as his head is partially sunken into one of his deluxe pillows. "Did you just get distracted by sniffing my sweat? You're such a greedy, filthy fucking pet."

You instantly start whimpering in apology, overflowing with self-hatred as you hasten toward the foot of his bed. You would say sorry, in so many words, if you could, as you should.

But you can't, given that you're not human. And your master knows that of course. All you want is to worship his body, and show him you're sorry, but you need permission before you can move from your place on the floor...

"Crawl up onto the bed," he commands, well assured you will follow his orders as fast as you can. "Go ahead, you pathetic whore. Make yourself useful and worship my back. Can't you see I'm exhausted and need to relax?"

Oh, how you love when he lets out his inner beast and treats you to the absolute most savage side of Jax.

Though you also love when he is soft, when he treats you with sweet talk and cuddles you up... this is the side of him you adore even more. His abuse is just what you live for.

"I want a full body massage," he orders, as you set to work on his muscular shoulders. "Yeah, use those paws. And that dirty mouth of yours... so dirty... mmm, that's it, lick all the sweat off my body. Desperate fucking dog."

You don't need him to tell you—that is exactly what you're dying to do—but it's so much better when he does. So damn hot. It's insane just how much you get off on his dirty talk.

And he keeps going on as you worship his perfect physique. While your hands rub and knead every inch, your mouth traces a line down the smooth divine curve of his spine, running down the black ink of the reaper design, wet lips puckering into passionate kisses all over his dewy skin, slurping up each new bead of fresh sweat as it dribbles and leaks. Every so often, his degrading words and his delicious groans of pleasure cut to cruel sadistic laughter, whenever he wants to humiliate you for being such a freak.

That just makes you love him even more. You're his subhuman whore, reduced into a literal pig as the maddening scent and flavor of your master makes you fucking squirm, wriggling like a worm, every sound out of your throat a squeal or a squeak. His savage strength makes you so weak...

"Unghh God, you're such a fucking animal," he snarls as you salivate all over his sculpted muscles. "Get that worthless face lower down where you belong. Yeah, you know what you want. Suffocate in my asshole."

And that very instant, you do just as told. You wedge your whole damn head into the sacred space between his sweaty cheeks, diving in deep, digging for gold. It's salty and sweet and so so fucking hot. You don't even care whether you'll ever come up for air or not. He's everything you need and all you want to breathe. Your king Jax Teller is a motherfucking god...

When he growls and reaches back with both of his strong hands to push his palms against your skull and smash your face even deeper inside his crack, the pure aggression of the act gives you a goddamn heart attack.

Before you can even recover from that, he suddenly shifts—you gasp for a split second as his magnificent body lifts.

But the next thing you know, he is squatting low over your mouth, then sitting the fuck down till your tongue is lodged deep in his tight sweaty hole and his big heavy balls are completely smothering your snout.

Jax throws his head back with a guttural groan as he starts to grind, taking your mouth for a ride. You could die just from that fucking sound, from the taste, from the feel of his full body weight as he shudders and sighs, dominating your face. Degrading you just right. You could do this all night. Then he looks back down, bright blue gaze locking with your eyes, open wide, sex-crazed and lost in a mad loving daze.

Is this fucking real? Even as it happens, you honestly can't fathom how good it feels...

And there's no way that you wouldn't notice, in this position of pure bliss, your master's fucking enormous cock. While you drown in his ass, savoring your sweet feast, that massive piece of meat is throbbing right above you like a beast, hard as a rock.

"Fuuuck, that's it—eat my ass, you good-for-nothing pig..." Jax explosively grunts as his hot sphincter squeezes and strangles your tongue. "Look what you're doing to my dick. You're gonna make me fucking cum. That what you want?"

Ohhh Godddd...

He goes on before you can respond. "Well, that's just what you're gonna get. Ughh—such a good little pet..." he praises as he begins pumping himself, the pink tip of his dick giving off the rich scent of his juices, each sweet drop that glistens, all glossy and wet. Some of his precum drips to your forehead.

But that's not where his full load is going to land. No, that's all gonna go down your dirty whore throat. Jax then clutches the top of your head with one hand, fingers rooting hard into your scalp, making you gulp and gasp, as you suck on his ass, while his other fist jacks off his perfect dick, faster and harder with each fucking stroke. He's so hot it's a joke.

"Shit—gonna cum—take it, bitch... take it all till you choke..." he moans, pulling his ass swiftly off of your slobbering lips and then pressing the tip of his cock onto your twitching tongue. Blessing you with a huge load of sweet white hot cum. By this point you're struck dumb.

You can feel your eyes roll to the back of your skull, as you savor his flavor and swallow him whole. You are so goddamn grateful. Jackson Teller is feeding your body, your heart and your soul.

You're reminded right now of what you've always known: that you are his to own. He is more than human, so much more, all that you live for... and you are so much less and always have been. Falling in these roles just feels so fucking natural. He is a fucking god—everything you are not—and you're a fucking animal.

Once he is done using you as his subhuman cum dump, your master is gracious enough to let you clean him up. You wrap your lips around his flawless cock to lick and suck off every drop. Pressing French kisses all across his freshly drained balls and his perfect pink asshole. Hoping that your beloved master knows he's your entire world.

"Good girl," Jax sighs, as your face nestles in the space between his strong powerful thighs. "Bet you wish you could sleep with me here in this bed. But that would be wrong. Don't you know where you belong, you filthy little pet?"

Ah, yes—you could never forget. With a whimper of submissive bliss, you give your master one last kiss, right on the tip of his delicious dick. Admiring how even right after he came it’s still so stiff and throbbing and thick.

And then you climb off of his mattress and crawl into your tiny pet bed, set right by his nightstand. The spot where you're so blessed to sleep beside this divine god of a man. You curl yourself up nice and small, into a little ball, so you can fit. And all the while you're still squealing like a pig. You just can't help it.

The king of Charming huffs out one of his majestic snickers at the sound of you grunting and groveling, so low-down and pathetic. "Goodnight, pig."

Your heart flutters—so grateful and glad that he calls you that, just what you are to him, always will be... so fucking filthy... you know that he is pleased, and his pleasure is all that matters.

You already can't wait till the morning when he'll let you drink from his dick, hopefully. But till then you'll just sleep, knowing that all your dreams will be sweet, for you dream of one thing only: pleasing your master.

And you're living that dream, as unreal as it seems. Your real life is as good as it gets.

You'll go on forever loving every minute of living with Jax Teller—living for Jax Teller, now and forever—as his filthy fucking pet.

***************

… Sooo I know that was SUPER kinky shit, but I hope there are some filthy bitches who enjoyed it, and would love to hear if you did!! 😅❤️

– Main Masterlist

– Dirty Little Secret Masterlist

***************

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139 notes · View notes

soobadnoonecanstopher · 3 years

Text

Touch it for Real, Part 4

Genre: Humor / Fluff / Eventual Smut

Warnings: OMG they were roommates / slice of life / slow burn / mutual pining / crude humor / cursing / virgin!baek / idiots to lovers

A/N: The song featured in the kitchen scene is Fantasy by Mariah Carey.

Characters: Baekhyun X You/Female Reader

Description: You teach Baekhyun how to date. (Basically the Get You Alone M/V)

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5

You were puzzling. Alone in your bedroom, laying within the comfort of your own bed, you were positively puzzling.

After sorting out just who Ben was and fixing the damage Baekhyun had done to your reputation by explaining that your idiot roommate had just gotten a hold of your phone, you reintroduced yourself and apologized for the confusion.

This ‘Ben’ actually seemed to laugh off the odd behavior he’d gotten as a first impression of you, mentioning that your roommate seemed funny, if not weirdly protective of you.

You could see what he meant when you read through the rapid fire questions Baekhyun had asked him from his age, to his preferred operating system, whether or not Ben had Facebook so “you” and him could be friends, his profession, and his parents line of work, his current place of work, how long he’s worked there and whether or not he moves around a lot, his hometown, his hobbies and even whether or not Ben has now or has ever had any pets; it seemed that Baekhyun had actually done a whole lot of legwork to give you a pretty good idea of what Ben might be like.

But the moment Baekhyun’s conversation topic changed to innocently ask Ben for his astrological sign, something struck you as off to see Baekhyun proclaim you to also be the same sign and after the two compared birthdays you began to find the whole exchange quite odd.

You realized that Baekhyun had simply lied about your birthday. Baekhyun knew your birthday. Why had he given a fake date to Ben? Unless there was something else happening that you didn’t understand. Then again, Baekhyun had always been rather stingy about giving out personal information; both yours and his. He was probably just being cautious about revealing too much to a stranger.

And actually, Ben seemed rather …. nice. You always hesitated to give them this adjective right off the bat as most of the guys you met who seemed nice right away turned out to be very good at faking nice and stringing along at least three or four girls at once for the shot at fucking at least one of them, and the hopes of fucking all of them.

You’d been called the wrong name late at night, whispered through a sleepy voice over the phone. You’d been sweet-talked and then abruptly called a bitch for refusing to send nudes to a guy you’d been talking to for only a week. Apparently a week was his limit and all his other girls gave him what he wanted within a couple of days. You’d been ghosted by nice guys who felt victimized and led on when you said goodnight politely with a smile and a wave instead of inviting them inside for ramen.

You did want a nice guy. But you wanted a real one.

What you wouldn’t give for one of them, for just one of them to be honest with you and really show you their true self.

Perhaps you had been going about it all wrong.

Your conversation with Ben quietly fizzled and you put your phone away to charge and now, now you were simply puzzling.

It panged at your heart to think of it, but the upset with Baekhyun hours earlier kept replaying in your mind. You propped your feet up on your wall and let your head hang off the edge of your bed, enjoying the way the gravity pulled at the blood in your brain and you tapped your fingers on the bed absentmindedly to the soft beat of music you heard playing from his room.

And you puzzled.

Don’t use your beauty as a weapon against me.

You hadn’t been this bothered by something since you’d watched that Mission Impossible movie the first time and spent an hour and a half trying to wrap your head around the complicated plot.

A Weapon.

Your beauty … a weapon … against me.

Why did it bother you so much? Why had he been so upset that you were playing with him, that you were messing with him. He messed with you all the time. You messed with him just as much. He never got this upset. No, he never got upset in this way. In such a way as to call you out on using something you had, against him. Something that you hadn’t even known had any power at all to attack the man. Your beauty. Did you have such a thing?

You thought about the other times you fought with him.

Not really fought, the two of you never did that, but that fake sort of fighting like when he’d woken you up at 2am for the third night in a row with his loud working music and you found him out in the kitchen disassembling your favorite toaster, the one with the wide slots for bagels that also toasts four slices of bread at once and even has special buttons for frozen items. The stainless steel one that you won in a work raffle and proudly marched through the office carrying with a huge smile on your face. It was a deluxe model. Supreme even. The master of it’s craft. Said so right on the box. Your toaster in a million pieces on your kitchen counter; all because he needed some components or resistors or whatever the fuck it was and he decided the best move was to take your toaster apart rather than to just order what he needed online and wait two business days for them to arrive.

Sure, he put it back together a few days later but not without enduring the laser eyes you shot him over breakfast when you had to toast a piece of bread in a frying pan on the stove like a loser who did not own a four slice Deluxe Toastmaster Supreme.

You’d planned your revenge then. It was something tiny and it involved his TV remote. His precious TV was enormous, took up almost the whole wall, OLED or SUPER-NANO or ULTRA-NANO some similar nonsense words and had 8-Ks of pixels or so he claimed and had so many smart functions you could hardly get comfortable using it for anything that didn’t involve the Netflix button. And no, no, you didn’t do anything to the actual TV. Relax, this was just the remote. This was harmless. Absolutely harmless. Easy to solve really if he had half a brain in his head.

You just carefully cut out the smallest tiniest piece of IR blocking tape that fit exactly over the infrared sensor on the remote control and fit so well it was undetectable to the human eye. Unless you knew it was there and knew exactly where to stick your fingernail in under the plastic bezel to peel it back. You simply applied the tape and left the remote right on the coffee table before you left for work.

You’d come home that night to a pile of assorted battery packs all strewn about the coffee table, and the remote completely taken apart down to the tiny circuit board and Baekhyun was quietly touching the tip of some tiny tool to the different spots on the scary looking green part from inside of the remote with all the metal bits stuck to it and when you slowly walked by he looked up at you through the magnifying eye glasses he wore. His eyes looked comically enormous and you swallowed away your laughter and considered how long you’d let him suffer.

“Something wrong with your remote, Peanut Butter?”

“It was working fine yesterday. I just don’t understand it.”

“Maybe it’s the batteries,” you offered innocently and he just ignored your helpful suggestion as he began screwing tiny screws into place with a precision screwdriver.

He was reassembling it all now and you sat down beside him on the sofa about as amused as you had ever been to sit and watch him suffer.

He grabbed two new batteries from an unopened pack on the table and aimed the remote, pressing the buttons again and again. Nothing happened.

He was surprisingly calm about the whole thing and judging by the various shopping bags and different brands of batteries you saw, he seemed to have been working on this all afternoon. Probably for hours now.

“I’m going to have to take the TV apart.”

He was already standing up and walking across the room toward the wall mounted monstrosity when you leaned forward for the remote. He glanced back at you as you did it and he looked at you just in time to see you shake the remote back and forth and then hit it twice lightly against your left hand. Just a little knock-knock should do it. You were careful to keep the expression on your face calm and well controlled.

When you pressed the power button, the big TV came to life and you pressed the button for Netflix and scrolled through your recommended titles. You had a new episode to watch. You’d have to make time tonight for that. After he was done with his little project here.

Baekhyun instantly pulled his hands away from the TV and hopped back and away from the screen, peering up at it with his mouth hanging wide open. His eyes shot back to where you sat on the sofa holding the remote control. You did not allow your smile to form. Nothing in your whole life had ever been so difficult. You felt as if you could pop right here. You casually flipped through the menu on the screen and the man looked back up at the TV and back down at you again.

You could see him coming in then. He was moving fast with several large steps toward you and with the quickest movement you could manage you used the tip of your finger to slide the IR tape back over the remote sensor. You could not be as precise as you had been before with him coming right at you so quickly, but hopefully it wouldn’t be visible.

He reached for the remote. “What did you do, how did you fix it?” He held it up and pointed it toward the TV. Again, the remote did not work. You bit down hard on the inside of your cheek.

He was pressing buttons again and nothing happened with each new button he smashed down. You could see the madness growing in his eyes the more he tried.

He made the smallest whining sound from the back of his throat and it took every ounce of self control to keep from laughing as he lightly tapped the remote twice against his hand just as he had seen you do. Nothing.

You tried to hold it. You tried so hard. A tiny sound escaped, the smallest sniffle with a laugh broke free from your throat and you coughed lightly to hide it.

His face turned on you and those crazed eyes were back only instead of directing them at the remote, he was looking at you now.

“How did you fix it? Do it again.” He looked insane and desperate and a tiny smile betrayed you as you grabbed the remote from his hand. You played the smile off as part of the help you were willing to offer him but you also had to inhale a deep breath and carefully and slowly exhale it through your mouth to keep from breaking completely.

You held it up in your right hand and gave it a little shake. As quickly as you had done it before you turned the remote on its side as you gave those two little knocks and his head flipped toward the TV when you aimed. With his eyes averted you were able to slip the tape off just before pressing the button.

The Netflix logo greeted you and Baekhyun threw his head back and let out a loud frustrated yell into the ceiling above him.

You’d been holding your laugh for too long. It was becoming too difficult now and he was back, reaching for the remote when the first suffocating giggles took your composure and you laughed out loud.

Your laughter brought all of his attention right to you and only you. The entirety of his focus shifted and that brought those crazed eyes of his bearing down on you, wide and demanding.

It was, by far, the most successful and meanest prank you had ever played on him to date and you were gasping for air and laughing as he reached for you. He grasped both of your shoulders and he shook you as you laughed and laughed at the absolute madness in his eyes. Oh he was crazy. It was just so damn funny.

The remote was still in your hands and you flipped through the different inputs on the TV as you cackled and tears formed at the corners of your eyes.

“How did you do it? You devil! Tell me how you did it?”

He balanced with his knees on the couch and his hands were on you, roaming over the fabric of the sweater you wore, lifting your arms to look under them, maybe for spare remotes or for hidden batteries or secret formulas, who knows what he thought he might find.

You’d stashed the tiny circle of tape by sticking it to the skin inside your elbow and he was currently examining the fingers on all of your hands up close as if they concealed all of the secrets he was looking for.

It wasn’t until he searched higher, pulling your hand forward toward his chest and his thumb grazed against the shiny plastic of the tape circle you had on your inner arm when he did a double take, pulled your arm harder and lifted an accusing finger to point at the tape.

“What is that?!” He clearly thought himself to be the world’s greatest detective.

You allowed yourself to be manhandled by him a little bit more as you got every bit of humor about your recent victory out of your chest and you lifted your other hand, the one he did not have held hostage right now to wipe at the tears that had fallen from your eyes.

“Stop laughing and answer me, woman! What is it?”

“It’s my birth control patch,” you said through a laugh and his eyes widened as he pulled his hand back. It was a tiny movement but you were so close to his accusing eyes that it felt monumental and the dramatic reaction to your teasing lie made a fresh wave of laughter bubble up in your chest. You knew he would react this way. Any mention of your contraceptives always made him clam up.

“It’s IR tape, Baekhyun. Infrared blocking tape. I put it on the sensor this morning after breakfast. After I made toast in a pan instead of in my toaster.”

The truth pulled his whole head back and he fell down on his butt on the sofa briefly before he slipped and fell right off the couch onto the floor and he sat there with a blank lifeless look on his face; staring ahead without any focus in his eyes.

“Do you know how sad pan toast is, Baekhyun? Tell me, how am I supposed to be satisfied with pan toast when I should have been having Deluxe Toastmaster Supreme toast?”

He was shaking his head back and forth as you spoke and when he did move it was to lay down flat on his back on the floor of the living room. His hands were up and he rubbed roughly over his face.

“Oh my god. Oh my god—it’s so good. I would have never checked for tape over the sensor. Fucking tape. A piece of goddamn tape. I was so focused on the batteries.I went to three different stores today. The circuits to the sensor were all intact, I checked it, it was good — I never even considered this. Are you an evil genius? My sweet innocent Bug ... is actually an evil supervillain.”

You left him on the floor and made your way into the kitchen to make dinner. It was your night to cook and thanks to the man stewing on the floor of the living room you had to do it around the scattered carcass of your third favorite kitchen appliance.

You remembered the way he reacted then. He pouted and moaned on the floor for a few moments until he smelled the stew you were cooking on the stove. It was comfort food. Something with meat and potatoes and warmth and spices. It would lift anyone’s mood and his had been lifted almost immediately. There were no apologies or any tears. Just a promise to put the toaster back together tomorrow after he went to the store for the parts he needed and that was the end of it.

He didn't storm away. He didn't raise his voice or say you were mean or unfair or too beautiful for him to withstand. He didn't get angry about closeness being used the wrong way, in a way that was unfair to him. In a way that could hurt him, like a weapon.

If he said you had the kind of beauty that could be used against him, didn't that mean he found you beautiful? Wouldn't that mean that Baekhyun found you attractive?

The words protested inside your mind. You shook your head.

That was impossible. Definitely. You’ve been so close to him for so long without even a hint of that sort of a feeling from him. Sure you were close to each other. Sure you cared for each other. It was a familiar sort of affection you shared. But attraction? Because he found you beautiful in a way that was unfair?

The puzzling was giving you a headache. There were some things that just did not exist in the same space in your mind and that was the existence of your roommate, Byun Baekhyun, and the possibility that he was attracted to you in any way.

You’d been inside your bedroom for hours now and you were no closer to answers than when you first came in here.

Baekhyun would be done with his episode. He would have watched it with Mia and discussed themes or scenes or dramatic moments with her. Did he talk to her on the phone or maybe though a headset as they streamed the episode together.

Did he like her voice and did she like his jokes?

Did he make her laugh? Of course he did. He made everyone laugh. Baekhyun was charming and hilarious. But could she make him laugh? Could she make him giggle and shake like he laughed with you?

It was late. That didn't really mean all that much to Baekhyun, as the man didn't really have any set bedtime and usually just fell asleep when the sun began to come up. It was a weekend night and you didn't have work in the morning and frankly your curiosity had grown too much for you to just stay in here and fall asleep without at least checking on how the streaming date went.

You knocked lightly on his door. You could hear music playing inside. Nothing too loud or crazy. The man seemed to be having a somewhat low key evening.

“Yeah,” his voice called lowly and you opened the door and peeked your head inside.

“How is our girlfriend doing?” Baekhyun was sitting on his butt on the floor in front of his bed with his head laid over his arms and his phone abandoned in the middle of the floor out of arm’s reach.

He let out a long low groan but did not lift his head up when you stepped inside.

“I don't even know. I don't know.” He sounded defeated already and this had only just started.

“Peanut, what happened?” You picked up the phone and unlocked the screen, searching through his apps to find the dating app so you could see if they had said anything to each other that might give you some clues about what went wrong.

“Nothing happened. I was too quiet. I couldn’t talk at all. I didn't say anything during the entire episode. Why is this so scary. Uggghhh...I feel unsafe. It’s gross.”

You stepped over him and climbed onto his bed, sitting up against the head of the bed as you scrolled through the chat logs.

It looked normal. Not unfriendly. A little terse and abrupt on his part. The man didn't know how to loosen up when he talked to girls and you wondered if maybe you needed more one on one lessons with him before he was really ready for this stuff.

When you leaned back against the headboard you felt the bed dip and he climbed onto the bed beside you and angled his body toward where you sat up against the pillows.

When you got to the end of the chat you could see that she was the last one to speak and she remarked that he felt a bit different from when they spoke at the beginning of the day. He didn't say anything in response to that.

Baekhyun moaned with his eyes closed and he turned his head into your waist. He was obviously reliving some perceived embarrassment he must have felt during the interaction with Mia and when he moved his arm around your waist you looked down to find yourself trapped under his arm that constricted as he pulled tightly, hiding the entirety of his face somewhere in the shirt you wore. He was warm. The weight of his arm around you felt nice.

“I felt so unsafe,” he repeated his complaint from earlier and his voice was obscured and muffled as he hid himself. He switched the tense though and you wondered if he no longer felt unsafe now that you had come in.

You typed out a quick response to Mia. You didn't think it was right to just leave her hanging without an explanation for his strange silence during and after the show.

“I’m going to tell her that you were so quiet because you were nervous. I’ll also thank her for watching the episode tonight.”

You heard and felt a hum and the tightness of his arm around your waist relaxed a little as his arm went slack. He did not move though. He still hugged you. He was still warm and it took only a moment for your nose to pick up the pleasant smell of his clean bed sheets fresh from the dryer. You both had a schedule for washing things like towels and bed sheets. Yours had been cleaned today as well, but something about the smell of his bed felt better than yours had. Perhaps it had been all that difficult puzzling that had tainted yours.

Mia responded right away to your message. She was flattered by his nervousness. You could tell with the way she reassured that he really didn't have to be nervous around her. That she was an easy going kinda girl. Low maintenance she said. You scoffed at the thought of a computer geek being low maintenance. As if you didn't know how difficult to obtain fancy GPUs were and how expensive high powered CPUs, high capacity SATA drives, and their required cooling systems were. You looked around Baekhyun’s set up and figured it had to run somewhere in the multiples of tens of thousands of dollars; just in this room alone.

Low maintenance. Please, she was just as high maintenance as any other regular girl just with a different catalogue of parts.

You switched to the emoji keyboard and keyed off some random happy faces and closed her chat window with more force than was necessary; suddenly and unexpectedly irked when she responded with similar emojis and the notification popped up on the screen. You swiped it away quickly to be rid of it.

“She sounded nice though, even if I couldn’t talk. She sounded nice. Do you think she will even want to talk to me again? I think she likes you more than me.”

“She will like you. If she doesn’t she’s an idiot. A girl would have to be an imbecile, Peanut, to not fall for you.”

He lifted his face then, just enough for the corners of his eye to peek out and you looked down at the side of his face as he looked at you for a moment, absorbing the encouraging words you spoke to him. His leg began to shake somewhere on the end of the bed. You could feel the rhythmic motions. He often did this when he was tired.

You had been scrolling through matches on his phone, building on an idea that popped into your head.

The man needed some practice to build up his confidence. Maybe, just maybe you could find another girl. Someone who he could talk to, chat with, be friendly with, that maybe wasn’t just so wonderfully perfect for him. Someone just to break the ice with.

You stopped on a girl. Her dress was short and the neckline was low. She really left very little up to the imagination with this outfit. Outside of the revealing clothes, it was clear that she was a beautiful woman. She was sexy and very confident in herself despite the glaringly obvious grammatical typo in her bio.

You spun the phone around to show him.

“She looks nice,” you said. Baekhyun blinked at the phone and pulled his face back a little to see the image clearly.

“—-follow you’re dreams — you are — Never too old to follow you are dreams.” Baekhyun read out the sentence with the typo out loud and you laughed.

“Come on, she’s pretty,” you said softly, “right?” You probed gently and he chuckled once to himself and closed his eyes up with a sigh.

“Yeah, she’s pretty,” he said after a while and you felt yourself stiffen just a little bit with his admission. Of course she was. Anyone could see it. He’d be lying if he didn't admit it.

“Okay but like, just pretty or do you also think she’s beautiful?”

He hummed some non response and you focused your attention back on the phone in your hands. After scrolling through a few more profiles you found another woman whose beauty shone brightly right through the screen at you.

“And her? Is she pretty or is she beautiful?”

Baekhyun’s eyes opened again but just barely. He looked half asleep and you wondered if the reason his arm was still around you was because he was so sleepy he didn't realize he was still hugging you like this on his bed.

“Pretty,” he mumbled and pushed his face into your waist again. This time the shaking in his leg began to settle and you could hear a slow steadiness in his breathing.

“Should I message her? Maybe we can practice talking to her so you’re not so nervous talking to girls?”

“Sure Bug,” he said quietly, “you can do anything you want.”

He was falling asleep now. You could feel the change. It didn't matter. You’d let him rest a bit while you opened up a chat window and began talking to Candy.

She responded quickly and had a completely different feeling from Mia. Maybe this was good. Candy was easy to talk to but she had nearly nothing in common with Baekhyun. She casually asked what a computer programmer did and when you went into specifics you had trouble finding synonyms for words that didn’t just make it all more complicated. You finally settled on a simple explanation of what kinds of computer software Baekhyun had developed and left it at that.

After a while Baekhyun shifted in his sleep and uncovered his face. His lips were parted and from the upside down angle you could see the dark splash of his pretty eyelashes that landed over his soft cheeks. He looked lovely and peaceful. All the worries and fears of the day were gone and he was sleeping so calmly. You watched his sleeping face for a while, growing warm inside with the strange contentedness you felt.

You could see some light movement behind his eyes and you wondered if he was dreaming about anything.

Candy had asked for a picture. She was asking something superficial like what sort of car Baekhyun drove and you slipped into his picture gallery for the folder with the shots you took for him when he first bought his car. You found a nice one with him smiling behind the driver’s seat, bright red seatbelt across his chest and the logo of his fancy ride on the steering wheel.

‘Wooo, baby boy an Audi? you must be loaded. When are you gonna come pick me up in that?’

You laughed at her obvious reaction. Candy was exactly as you expected her to be. Baekhyun would be able to laugh and chat with her easily without too much pressure of impressing a complicated woman like Mia was. Candy was an open book. The stakes were lower with Candy.

Your giggle made him stir and you looked down to see his eyes open a tiny bit before he closed them again.

“It’s going well with Candy,” you whispered and he inhaled a breath and nodded his head as he closed his eyes again.

“Mmm, the pretty one?” he asked in a sleepy voice and you hummed your confirmation. Something buzzed inside of you; just a bit of nerve. Call it gumption.

“Baek,” you called quietly and his lips parted with his breathing but his eyes stayed closed this time. He did not respond. He didn't give any indication at all that he heard you call him.

“Baek, what about me?” Your voice was tiny when you asked it. You felt more warmth in this bed suddenly. You felt it in your chest and it seeped up to warm up your face too.

He hadn’t responded at all to your question. It had been pretty unclear though. He might not have heard it, or might not have understood it. Or his sleep may have just been too deep to register your words.

“Am I pretty or am I beautiful?” You said it so quietly there was little chance of him actually hearing it. He was asleep and you were just here, trapped in his embrace on his bed as he slept and you puzzled over the words he had told you during an upset. The words that you had pried from him when he was vulnerable and emotional. The words that you shouldn’t be over analyzing like this. Those words felt too risky to be giving this much thought to.

Here you were again, using your sneaking methods to try and trick him into something when you knew it wouldn't work, when you knew there was nothing really there and you were reading too far into things.

His steady breathing continued. His eyes remained closed and his arm still gripped around your tightly, holding you still, holding you close to him as he slept.

So you gave up. You’d moved back to the phone to respond to Candy; something silly and lighthearted, something easy just like she was, when you heard him speak.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” he said so far under his breath the statement sounded more like air than actual vocalization of any kind and your fingers stopped their rapid typing in the middle of your sentence.

Your eyes looked down. Your entire body was frozen. Half of you expected to find his eyes open and a wide teasing smile on his lips, begging for you to take the bait and believe his words just for the chance of laughing at your shocked face and making fun of you for being stupid enough to believe them.

He was asleep. His eyelids did not pull open when you looked down at him and his breathing remained as steady as ever.

Baekhyun was asleep.

That damn puzzling — your jaw was sore from clenching your teeth down and your lips were dry and chapped from biting them.

You had dropped the phone and it disappeared somewhere amid the bedcovers.

Baekhyun’s sleep was deeper now. He must have been very tired to be falling asleep so recklessly like this. You shifted downward and made some attempt to find the phone without waking him up and your small movement made him inhale a deep breath through his nose and he was moving now. You felt him shifting, moving his sleepy body up higher in search for some comfort; for something to lay on that was a bit more comfortable than flat on the middle of the bed like that.

You used the movement to reach for the blanket and pull it over his body so he could be warm at least and when he finally settled he shared the same pillow as you. His forehead rested against your shoulder and he was once again, fast asleep.

His arm though— you found yourself still very much trapped in nearly the same embrace as before, just shifted. A forearm landed over your chest and you felt a new heaviness of his bent leg land over your thigh.

You could wake him.

You could push him off and let him roll the other way so you could make an escape back to the peace of your own bedroom.

You would. You would do that soon.

Your current state of thoughts was simply too overloaded to follow through on any game plan. If you could only have a few more minutes of his warm steady breathing, you would move away from this. You would do it.

It wasn’t that you had never considered it. It was that you had gone through many lengths to come to this place. You were safe and secure here.

It was that you had nowhere else to go when it was over.

This place was your home.

Peanut was part of that home.

Things were nice right now; the way they were at home.

But…

As they sometimes do, and against your own will, your thoughts wandered.

You wondered as they wandered — wondered about him.

From the deepest parts of your mind; down where you’d shoved them roughly many times before, those wondering thoughts danced and swayed lightly to the soft music playing in this room.

Those secret thoughts about the sweetness in his eyes. Secrets about the fondness you felt for the little tips of him; the tip of his nose, the tips of his fingers, the pink tips of his ears. Thoughts you refused to encourage.

Baekhyun was asleep and you were thinking.

With the thinking came the shame and your skin was hot to the touch. The last thing you wanted was to ruin your home. With the thinking came the denial. You could not encourage anything. You could not afford to become complacent. You did not need these thoughts to become so brazen. You did not need them taking root. The last thing you needed was them making an appearance again.

The sounds he made while dreaming pulled your closed eyelids back open. You turned your face toward the sound. It was soft, the small groan from the back of his throat. But his face changed then; eyebrows screwed together and his lungs constricted as he let out a softer sound, like a whine. It was a complaint. His face showed signs of pain. The dream must have been unpleasant.

You lifted a hand then, shifted within his embrace you raised your palm and laid it carefully over the side of his face.

The shift happened with the warm contact and his features evened out and that pained look was gone.

You smiled then. So sleepy but satisfied that you could help when he needed it.

You would move after he got a little more sleep. After he’d had a little more comfort from you, you would move.

You weren’t the first to move. And it seemed by the change in light that shone through the windows that your visit had lasted much longer than you had intended.

It was the untangle that woke you up. A conscious and deliberate lifting of limbs; the careful grip of a hand lifting your arm by the wrist and setting it gently down on a flat mattress.

You opened your eyes when he pulled his own leg out from between your thighs. The temperature change was most jarring. You had felt so warm before.

Baekhyun was sitting up in his bed. His hair was standing up in places all over his head and he was moving slowly and carefully, in an attempt to disengage himself from the tangle of this woman he had just woken up with.

The sleep was still very thick in your head. It hadn’t been a full night’s sleep had it? You felt like you had just closed your eyes a minute ago and yet the sunshine was so bright outside already.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun whispered when he realized you were now awake and looking at him, “guess I got too comfortable...must have fallen asleep.”

His voice was thick with sleep and with embarrassment too, you could hear it everywhere, with the quick words he spoke to you and the pink that covered the back of his neck and flooded his cheeks too.

This situation...this was an embarrassment. Of course it was.

This was something that should not have happened. Not with two adults of similar age who shared so many liberties with each other; spending time in each other’s arms at night, well…

You felt awkward all over. What if—what if you’d done something in your sleep? What if you said something?

And he already wasn’t meeting your eyes as he climbed out of the bed and awkwardly made his way into his bathroom.

You could hear the sound of the running water faucet and the door closed with the smallest click like he went out of his way to close it as softly and quietly as possible to avoid disturbing you any further.

You could feel the heat burning on the skin of your cheeks and you used his absence to get up and get out of his bedroom before he came out and found you still, still tangled in his bed sheets like you’d been tangled in his legs and in his arms all night.

You had to ignore this. You had to forget it ever happened, and anyway, you were best friends with the guy...right? Wasn't this thing bound to happen in the course of a friendship? What if you went on a holiday with him and the hotel only had one bed? These things really did happen, you read about it on twitter once. Would you be that asshole best friend who let him sleep on the floor just because he was a man? No! You could build a little pillow wall between your bodies and sleep as still and motionless as possible, like a corpse.

This feeling would go away. The red hot embarrassment would wash down the drain of your shower. The sticky warmth left behind by his skin would go with it.

You’d made it as far as to undress and turn on the hot water when an awful memory dawned on you.

Baekhyun still had your shampoo.

You didn't have any other shampoo in this bathroom that you could use. You pulled open cupboards and drawers, searching for anything; tiny hotel sized travel bottles, a nearly empty bottle under the sink for a rainy day, even maybe something in the trash can that still had a few drops. Nothing.

You eyed the hand soap on your sink and pictured stepping out of the shower a frizzy, tangled mess.

A soft knock vibrated against your bathroom door.

“Bug, your shampoo.” Baekhyun’s voice called out, muffled by the sounds of the running water and the door itself, “it’s almost empty, but there’s a little left. Sorry, I’ll run to the store and get more.”

Your ear was pressed against the door so you could make out everything he said; so you could listen carefully to the tone and delivery of his words to see if he was still embarrassed about last night or if he’d brush it off easily like he did most things that seemed to bother him.

There were another two soft knocks, “B-Bug?”

“Yeah, Peanut, thank you. Can you just...put it by the door. I’m already undressed. I’ll grab it in a bit.”

He did not respond right away and you stayed with your ear against the door waiting for some sound. Some indication that he had left. The click of your door, anything.

“I left it by the door,” you heard his far away voice shout and then the click of your door.

When your shower was done and you were dressed in your favorite weekend outfit, the high waisted comfy shorts with pockets and a cute top that made you feel somewhat pretty even on a casual day and you emerged from your bedroom feeling ready to face whatever weird moods or wacky situations accosted you today.

You found him singing a song to himself in the kitchen as he made something that smelled delicious for breakfast. The radio was on a pop station that played hits from all the past decades and the upbeat rhythm of the song that played was a definite favorite that had him dancing at the stove.

It was a groovy little love song, quite old now that you thought about it and you felt the beat hit hard in your chest with each pop of his shoulders and hips. The joy you could feel in this song hit you just like that beat hit; heavy and prominent, and you smiled wide to welcome this morning mood it brought with it.

When you stepped into the kitchen to grab a mug to make yourself some coffee you couldn’t help but sing along to the song, you loved the song as much as he did and when he noticed you enter the room you could hear him singing the main parts; expertly, even though the singer was a woman, his voice could always reach the high notes as well as the low ones. She was the kind of epic singer with one of a kind of talent that was world dominating. Baekhyun was singing along, doing the same kinds of ad-libs and vocal runs that she did and he did it while holding the spatula up to his face like a microphone.

As you walked by he dipped his head and looked into your face and his eyes caught ahold of yours. You knew what was coming. You could hear it coming in the song, the chorus. The part you had to sing. These were the rules. He leaned hard and brought the spatula up to your lips just in time for your part to come on. You did not disappoint. You gave it your all closing your eyes up tight and throwing your head back, singing from the very center of you, this part you always sang during this song. The part that was made for you; he knew it and you knew it.

His smile was genuine and breathtaking and he grabbed your hand with his spatula-less hand and pulled you into him, the beat taking over whatever bit of nervousness he might have had before. This was different. This was dancing. This was singing to simply the best song for a Saturday morning and it was moving and laughing with your best friend and you let him spin you in a small circle, careful to keep your coffee mug lifted so it didn’t hit anything during the spin.

His sense of rhythm was perfect. His hips moved as if they were made for this. You had no choice but to follow. An occasional hand on your hip told you where to go. The song was reaching its peak and you knew it was a short one. The best ones always were. It was going to begin winding down now. It was always such a sweet and short lived moment of happiness that you always appreciated immensely.

As a final move, he gave you a little spin and released you to go on your way toward the coffee maker you so desperately wanted to get to when you first entered this kitchen.

He finished the eggs with the last notes of the song.

As you both sat down to eat, his eyes met yours and yours met his and you dug into the eggs and bacon he’d prepared. You offered him a perfectly buttered toast slice and he took it, nodding his head as he bit into the crisp corner.

“So Bug,” he spoke up between bites of eggs, chewing and swallowing thoughtfully, “about this...Candy.”

You swallowed the hot coffee in your mouth and clasped your hands together, suddenly remembering how asleep he had been when you had hit it off with Candy, his practice girl.

He listened to your explanation. Your theory that the stakes were simply too high with Mia and he needed someone to talk to that was a bit more of a relaxed task for him. You called it easy mode so he might get the game reference. He ate and listened to you talk and occasionally his eyebrows would lift or screw together with whatever sorts of thoughts he was thinking inside his head. You could tell by his body language that he didn't exactly want to start something with Candy and you had to emphasize that it was really just for practice, talking to her. It was to help build his confidence.

“She’s already in, Peanut. She thinks you’re super cool, she thinks you’re rich and thinks you have a very good job and plus, you make lots of money and she seems super into that.”

He was not speaking yet, despite how much you had talked and you were beginning to get worried that he didn’t see the benefit of practicing his conversation skills a little bit.

“It’s not even real, Baek, you just have to make some things up with her. Just to get over that anxiety about talking to women. Just until you are more comfortable.”

When he finally did speak, it was as you feared.

“It just feels kinda gross, Bug. She’s a real person too, even if she is obviously a gold digger. It just seems wrong. I’ve been...thinking lately. What if this is...wrong of us?”

“What if I just have to tough it out with Mia and get the fuck over it and just,” he thrust his hands forward over the food on the table for emphasis, “just — blehhhh — talk, just fucking talk to her.”

You lifted a fork with eggs toward your lips but your stomach protested. You suddenly didn't want any more food. The coffee you were drinking had suddenly gone too cold for your liking and you pushed the plate and mug away from you with your fingertips.

You were bothered.

Why did he choose right now to suddenly grow a conscience about this? Did he forget that Mia was chatting with both of you and not just him?

“I...I just — I want to try with Mia. I know I can get over it and talk to her. And I don't want to talk to Candy. The person Candy thinks I am, well...that’s just false. I can’t be the person she’s expecting me to be.”

He had obviously read through the entire conversation with Candy last night and found the tales you told simply too stretched out for him to try and live up to.

“But that’s what people do when they start dating. They stretch the truth, make themselves sound just a little bit better, make themselves taller, or make themselves look richer. They all do this.” You simply could not understand why he didn’t get this. Why he didn’t just play by the rules that everyone followed to get through the door so he could stand a chance here.

“Well I don't. I don't want someone to fall for a fake version of me. I want someone to like me now. This me. Byun Baekhyun. The Peanut with anxiety who lives with Bug who almost killed him over a cheese stick, but who makes really great toast.”

He was smiling now, joking about the funny memories. You pulled your lips into a forced smile and lifted the coffee for another drink so you didn't have to smile any more.

He was watching your face. You were sure he sensed it. Something had bothered you to the point of giving up on your breakfast and every pass your eyes made over his face led to the same thing. He was watching you.

“Why are you upset?”

You shook your head lightly. Willing the obvious signs to leave your face. You didn't even know why. You didn't have a name for this. So you just shrugged in response to him.

“Because I don't want to practice on Candy? Did you actually like her for me?”

You really made your best attempt. You inhaled deep and closed your eyes and you shook your head.

Candy did not matter and you knew it. There was something ugly inside of you maybe. Something that did not want Baekhyun to get along with perfect Mia. Something that was fighting against the idea of him being happy and healthy and free of this unhealthy attachment you had to him. Free and happy away from you.

“Then why?”

Enough. You were being unfair to him. You had promised him that you would help him. You had gotten him this far and you’d be the worst kind of asshole if you didn't see him through to the end; if you didn't follow through with your promise to find him someone who would love him like he deserved to be loved, exactly as he was now. The amazingly wonderful Byun Baekhyun.

“It’s nothing like that,” you smiled softly. It felt like a sad smile, but at least it was genuine. “I just worry when you get so anxious. You know you fell right asleep last night. As soon as I came in, you passed right out.”

Your words skillfully slipped out of your lips and you successfully changed the subject. You felt like a coward, but you simply did not have words for what was happening to you.

“I didn’t...say anything did I? Before I fell asleep?”

This question was quiet. His fingertips grazed over his lips as he asked it, nearly muffling the words he shyly asked you at the breakfast table, the morning after.

You are so fucking beautiful.

You lifted your coffee cup to drink the tepid liquid inside and dropped your eyes from his shaking ones. The answer to his question sat on the back of your tongue even after you swallowed away the liquid.

You swallowed again and it refused to budge and yet you sat in silence, unable to utter a single word in reply to his quiet question.

Your silence went on for too long and he looked up into your face. An instant smile lifted at the corner of your lips and you forced it up into your eyes.

“You just slept, Peanut. We—” you had to exhale the breath that you had been holding for too long in your lungs, “we just slept.”

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5

Tag list: @j-pping @blahblahblah-boo @his-mochi-cheeks @amyeonzing@littleflowercrown13 @baekinmylife @insta1010 @nana-banana @f4ncyvelvet@bbhbeth @totallynerdstuff @byunbabybaek @maijinki @bbyunz@theclawofaraven

#Baekhyun #Exo #Baekhyun fic #Exo fic #Baekhyun smut #Baekhyun fluff #Exo smut #Exo fluff #Baekhyun fanfic #Baekhyun ff #Baekhyun fanfiction #exo fiction #baekhyun fiction #exo ff #exo fanfiction #exo series #baekhyun series

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heyiwrotesomethings · 3 years

Text

Dungeon Crawl

Abigail (Stardew) x She/Her Reader

A/N: For real though, I suck at navigating the Skull Cavern. I play on my ipad while I lay in bed and I cannot tell you how many times I’ve died in that hell hole because my stupid boobs were blocking the view of my health meter. Anyway, enjoy some spelunking with rock eating gf. Word Count: 4,259

“I can’t believe you’re actually letting me come with you, this is awesome!” Abigail grinned, watching out the window as grass and trees slowly morphed into a dry, sandy wasteland.

“Yeah,” (Y/n) rubbed the back of her neck before nervously checking her backpack for the essentials that would make the expedition run smoothly as possible, “Just stay close to me, alright? The Calico Desert isn’t like the mines back home.”

“Yeah, you keep telling me that,” Abi turned away from the window to roll her eyes at (Y/n), “have a little faith in me, will you? I’ve been training for this.”

“I know, it’s just—“

“(Y/n), I’ve got it. Seriously. I’m not some helpless baby.” Abigail huffed.

“Hey!”

(Y/n) and Abigail turned to face the front of the bus, Pam was looking at them through the rear view mirror.

“Are you two gonna get out or not?”

“Sorry Pam!” (Y/n) and Abi answered in unison, quickly making their way to the front of the bus.

“Yeah yeah, hey (Y/n), I’d like to go home before one in the morning tonight so try to stay on task, will ya?” Pam asked, making herself comfortable in her seat.

“I’ll try to make it short this time, I promise!” (Y/n) waved before hopping out of the bus to jog after Abigail who was already heading to the Skull Cavern entrance.

“Abi, wait up!”

“How about you keep up?” Abigail snickered, picking up her pace.

“We have to get you a galaxy sword remember? It’ll only take a second and it’s really cool.” (Y/n) said, slightly out of breath as she ran after her adventure-loving girlfriend.

“Oh yeah!” Abigail kept running, but changed her trajectory to head for the tall pillars in the shifting sands.

“Stop running! We’re in the desert, we need to conserve our energy!” (Y/n) called after her before pausing to rest in the baking sun, resting her hands on her knees she whispered to herself, panting slightly “Ah, forget it.”

(Y/n) took her time walking the rest of the way despite Abi’s yells to move faster. When she finally stood before Abi standing with her hands outstretched, (Y/n) smiled and sighed affectionately. She swung her backpack off and dug into one of the flaps until she felt the smooth stone she was searching for. She pulled out the prismatic shard and put it in Abi’s eagerly waiting hands.

“Now just stand in the middle of the pillars. That should work.” (Y/n) instructed.

“Got it.” Abi nodded, heading into the middle of the pillar ruins with the stone in hand. In a flash of light, the stone was gone. It was replaced with a shiny, purple sword. “This is so fucking cool,” Abi appraised the weapon, giving it a few practice swings.

“Sure is,” (Y/n) smiled, taking a step back from Abi’s sword swinging radius. “Ready to go in the cavern?”

“I sure am! Can’t wait to fight some new monsters.” Abi said, swinging the sword as she walked.

“Just remember, we’re here to mine iridium and any gems we come across. Only fight when necessary.”

“You worry too much, (Y/n). How bad can it be?”

“Bad, Abi. It could be very, very bad. So promise you’ll stay where I can see you.”

“Okay, okay,” Abi pouted, “Are we going in now or what? Half the day is practically gone already.”

“Alright,” (Y/n) steeled herself as she heard the key click in the lock of the skull door before her, “here we go...”

Almost immediately the were ambushed by serpents, but they were easily taken out within a few swings. (Y/n) turned to ask Abigail how she was doing but she wasn’t immediately visible.

“Abi?!” (Y/n) called out, cursing when she didn’t immediately hear a reply. She jogged through the cavern level, putting a hand on her chest, relieved when she saw Abi chipping away at some rocks. Still, she was a bit miffed at her for running off on her own.

“Abi! I told you to stay with me.” (Y/n) admonished, coming to stand beside her.

“What? I didn’t even go that far. Besides, look! Amethyst!” Abi’s eyes gleamed as she presented the purple stone to (Y/n).

(Y/n) decided to let it go for now, only because Abi looked so cute, nibbling at her favorite gem. She could see some aquamarine and topaz nearby so she told Abigail to start looking for the ladder so they could go down together when (Y/n) was done mining the gems. The farmer turned miner had barely cracked open the last gem filled rock before Abi declared she was going to scout ahead down a hole she found, shooting fear into (Y/n)’s heart.

“Damn it.” (Y/n) cursed, gathering the gems and throwing them in her bag before scurrying over and jumping into the hole she had seen a flash of purple disappear into. She screamed, dropping a hefty thirteen floors. Ouch.

Her legs tingled painfully, but (Y/n) quickly pushed past the pain and stood, looking around the new floor.

“Wow, these slimes are huge!” Abigail whistled, slicing at the gelatinous purple blobs.

(Y/n) rolled her eyes in annoyance, quickly joining her girlfriend in the battle. More serpents had sensed their presence so (Y/n) turned to keep them occupied while Abigail fought off the smaller slimes that had split off from the larger ones. When they finally fought all the monsters off, (Y/n) sat on a rock and shuffled around in her bag for some much needed nourishment.

“Abi, have something to eat. That fall was rough.” (Y/n) said, offering the sack.

“Nah, I’m good. I ate some amethyst, remember?” Abigail replied already turning to start bashing rocks, but (Y/n) swiped her by the wrist before she could keep moving.

“Abi, please eat something that has actual nutritional value.” (Y/n) implored. “Look, I even packed blackberry cobbler.”

“Ugh, you’re sounding like my mom right now,” Abi kicked at the dirt, “I’m fine!”

“Right now you’re fine. But that can change in an instant down here. That’s why we take precautions!” (Y/n) stressed, holding out a container of cobbler, “Take a few bites at least, please. For me?”

Abigail stared down at where (Y/n) sat with her lips pursed in frustration, but she sighed and soon relented, sitting beside (Y/n).

“Fine, a few quick bites, worry wart. Ahh,” Abi opened her mouth expectantly, making (Y/n) laugh despite herself.

(Y/n) complied to the request, cutting off a bite and stabbing it with a fork before offering it up to Abi. After a couple more bites Abi motioned that she was done and gave (Y/n) a quick, blackberry stained kiss.

“Thanks for the treat. You always make the best cobblers.” Abigail smiled sincerely.

“Aww, I’m glad you like them!” (Y/n) smiled back, the kiss and the kind words left her feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. But just as fast as the feeling came, it was dashed just as quickly when Abi immediately stood back up and began breaking rocks as quickly as she could.

(Y/n) pouted, ate the other half of the cobbler, then stood to join Abi just in time to find a ladder down.

“Jackpot!” (Y/n) cheered, the most excited she had been about the expedition all day. A whole cluster of iridium filled rocks. Hopefully they would yield a decent amount of ore. “Abi help me with these please. Be careful though, might have some crabs under them.”

“You got it.”

(Y/n) was relieved Abigail had agreed so easily. Especially when she could see three big slimes not too far from where they stood. They mined the iridium ore rock after rock, until all the shiny rubble was demolished. (Y/n) was prepared to ignore the slimes and just start smashing rocks in order to find the next floor, but Abigail immediately started hacking away at them.

She had split them all at the same time, resulting in about twelve smaller slimes surrounding her. (Y/n) rushed forward, assisting Abigail in killing the little purple blobs.

“We don’t have to fight every creature we come across you know.” (Y/n) reminded, walking a bit sluggishly from all the gunk that covered her boots.

“But these things can carry iridium sometimes, right? Why wouldn’t we fight them?” Abigail asked, already breaking more rocks.

“We’ll be here for six more hours at least. We need to conserve our energy.”

“You packed way more supplies than necessary for two people. We’ll be fine, you worry too much,” Abi struck a rock, revealing another hole, “Ah, nice!”

“Abi, wait! Aw man, my ankles still hurt from the last fall...” (Y/n) sulked, before dropping down.

Only four floors this time, but the space was overrun by mummies. (Y/n) found Abi putting them down one after the other, but some had already started to revive, following after Abi, completely unaware that they were still a threat.

(Y/n) began cutting them back down, throwing a bomb down before running after Abi and pulling her away seconds after she downed another mummy.

“What are you doing?” Abi asked, almost tugging against the pull.

“I set a bomb! Run!”

Abigail didn’t need to be told twice. An exhilarated grin split her lips and suddenly she was the one pulling (Y/n) out of the blast zone. Upon hearing the deafening boom and the crackle of rubble raining back down to the rugged earth, Abigail turned to see the damage, eyes alight.

“That’s so cool! Can I try next time?”

“Oh I don’t know...”

“Come on (Y/n), please?” Abigail asked, pulling (Y/n) closer and batting her eyelashes at her.

“Mm, okay. Just, be careful.” (Y/n) relented, handing a bomb to Abi.

“Sick.” Abi smiled, tossing the bomb between her hands.

“I said be careful.” (Y/n) warned, watching nervously.

“Calm down, it’s not like I’ll drop...” the next toss Abi made between her hands had the bomb skimming past the tips of her fingers. She fumbled with the explosive but couldn’t catch it in the end, smacking it against the rocky terrain.

“Shit, run!” (Y/n) yelled pushing Abigail away from the fizzing bomb.

They were still within the blast radius and with one last shove, (Y/n) managed to get Abi out of range. Unfortunately, she herself took some of the hit. Making matters worse, the earth below her opened up, swallowing (Y/n) down into further darkness.

“(Y/n)!” Abigail yelled, kneeling in front of the hole. “Don’t worry, I’m coming!”

Abigail delayed no further, leaping into the hole and falling only about eight floors this time. Still she felt a twinge in her feet at the impact.

“Woah,” Abi breathed out heavily as she gained her bearings. The ground was green and mossy, vines hung from the walls, but most notable were the giant reptilian beasts. “Are those all Pepper Rex? The one on (Y/n)’s farm is so small and unimposing though... (Y/n)!”

On the other side of the cavern, (Y/n) was fighting off serpents and iridium bats, while also trying to dodge the flames spewing out of the prehistoric creatures’ mouths. She looked exhausted, but she kept fighting, taking quite a few hits in the process. Abigail sprinted forward, slicing at one of the serpents diving at (Y/n)’s back.

(Y/n) turned to look behind her and Abi leveled a confident grin at her before swiveling on her heel to stand back to back with her. Abi swung her sword outward, cutting up any winged creature that swooped by. (Y/n) tried to do the same, though she was tired, hitting whatever came her way with a strained grunt and clangs of her sword beating against the cavern wall whenever a serpent or bat dodged an attack.

There were only a few flying creatures left, dive-bombing their heads. They needed to finish them off quickly because the dinosaurs were circling dangerously closer, the heat of their flames nipping at the couple’s skin as the were forced further into a corner.

Abigail let out a triumphant yell as the last bat was felled, iridium falling to the ground. She glanced back at (Y/n), finding her leaning forward heavily on her knees. It was clear to her that they needed to leave, now.

“Hang on, (Y/n). I’ll get us out of here.” Abigail approached, looping one of (Y/n)’s arms over her shoulders and hoisted her up.

“Just be careful... You’re parents will kill me if you get hurt.” (Y/n) groaned, trying to keep herself lucid.

Abigail scanned the room, searching for a path through the flames. Once she found an opening, she pulled (Y/n) forward, trying to block wayward blasts of fire with her sword as she continued to forge ahead towards the main staircase. It would be a long climb back up, but she’d take that over being roasted alive any day.

They had almost made it when a particularly strong flame lashed out at them, forcing roars of pain from (Y/n) as she took the brunt of the hit for Abigail.

“No!” Abigail grunted, picking up the pace. (Y/n) basically become dead wait in her arms as she dragged her to the ladder. (Y/n) couldn’t get up herself, not in this state. Abigail set her down and frantically searched (Y/n)’s bag for medicine as the lumbering beasts made steady progress in their direction.

Abigail found the medicine and with shaky hands, helped (Y/n) take some.

“I know you’re in a really bad way right now, but we got to get you back home, (Y/n). Do you think you can hang on my back?”

“I. can. try.” (Y/n) panted.

Abigail bent over and hoisted (Y/n) further up her back when she felt the weight settle, careful not to upset the burns too much she began forcing her way back up the ladder, leaving the terror of Pepper Rexs’ to hiss and pace below, lapping the invulnerable ladder with flames.

Abigail had never been more happy to see the sky. She staggered, plopping (Y/n) a little too harshly into the sand below her feet and then joined her. Uncaring of the little grains that were sure to stick in her clothes and hair. The sun, though now hanging low in the sky, had left the sand pleasantly warm, and it felt good on Abigail’s aching muscles, but not so much on the sporadic burns she had accumulated. She turned to look at (Y/n), assessing the damage. She was definitely roughed up to say the least.

“Are you okay, Abi?”

“Am I okay? Have you seen yourself?!” Abigail hovered over her girlfriend, a brittle laugh tumbled past her lips.

“I’ve had worse... actually, that was one of the better experiences I’ve had in the cavern.”

“What!” Abigail screeched, pulling at her own hair, “what could be worse than this?”

“Well, there have been a few occasions where I may have fallen unconscious and woken up at Harvey’s in less than ideal shape, unable to recall how I got there...”

“(Y/n)!” Abigail spluttered, “Why would you ever go in there? Why did you let me talk you into taking me here if this is what happens to you?”

“I can’t say no to you when you look at me with that face, you know the one. All cute and pouty. Also, iridium ore. We got a nice haul before everything went sideways.”

“We only got twenty-three!” Abigail shook her head.

“Yeah,” (Y/n) giggled tiredly, “a good haul.”

“You’re insane. That, or a masochist. And people say I’m weird for eating rocks.”

“You are weird for eating rocks, but Yoba, I wouldn’t want you any other way.”

“Okay, we need to get you into the bus and have Pam get you to Harvey’s straight away. You’re loopy.”

“This sand tastes rough.”

Abigail dragged (Y/n) back to the bus, disturbing Pam from her nap. Pam took one look at (Y/n) and rolled her eyes completely unfazed.

“Load her up. I’ll get us back to town as fast as I can.” Pam groused.

Abigail took (Y/n) to the back of the bus so she could lay out on the long bench with her head on Abigail’s lap. It made it easier to monitor the farmer on their way back and Abigail rustled through the backpack to find some more blackberry cobbler, sharing bites between herself and (Y/n) as they slowly built back their strength.

It was around ten o’clock at night when they returned. Pam helped Abigail carry (Y/n) to the clinic though she complained the whole time, muttering something about how a ticket worth five hundred gold was not enough money to have to deal with this. Pam left the girls outside of Harvey’s before making her way to the Inn for a drink before bed.

Abigail pounded on the clinic door, hoping her parents wouldn’t hear it somehow and come out to see what was going on. Luckily, the only person that seemed to hear the harsh banging was the doctor.

Harvey peeled the door back, looking rather tired already. When he saw the states of his visitors he appeared even more exhausted.

“Skull Cavern?” He asked.

“Skull Cavern.” Abigail affirmed.

“Alright,” Harvey sighed, “come in.”

After getting all patched up, Abigail guided (Y/n) out of the clinic, thanking Harvey for all the help along the way. (Y/n) made to head back towards her farm but Abigail pulled her towards the general store instead.

“Just stay with me tonight. My house is literally right here and you’ll probably pass out before you even made it out of town.” Abigail persuaded.

“What about your parents?” (Y/n) whispered, watching Abigail unlock the front door.

“They’ll just have to deal with it. I say we’ve been together long enough that they shouldn’t freak out about something as trivial as a sleepover. If they didn’t know we were dating, they wouldn’t even bat an eye over it. Just a couple of gals being pals.” Abigail grumbled opening the door slowly before whispering, “Let’s try to keep quiet anyway though. Just to keep the peace.”

“Okay...”

Abigail and (Y/n) tiptoed through the rows of shelves, making it to the living quarters portion of the building without incident. Abigail thought they were home free, but when she cracked the door to her bedroom open, the hinges moaned and creaked loudly.

“Abigail?”

“Shit, get in.” Abigail hissed at (Y/n), pushing her into her room before calling back to her mom, “Yeah, mom?”

Abigail cursed, hearing the flit boards creek and the light in her parents’ room turn on.

Caroline emerged from the doorway and turned on the hall light as well, causing Abigail to rub her eyes from the sudden brightness.

“Hi sweetie,” Caroline smiled, “did you have a good time with (Y/n) today?”

“Yeah.” Abigail answered, trying to sound nonchalant.

“You got home a little later then you said you would. You’re father tried to wait up for you, but he fell asleep.”

“The movie ran a little longer than we thought it would. Sorry I kept you waiting.”

“Don’t worry about it honey, your father will get over it.” Caroline assured, “How was the movie? Your father and I don’t feel like making the trip all the way to Zuzu City, but we were thinking about going to see it when it’s in town next week.”

“It was okay, mom.” Abigail shrugged, “I think you guys would like it. If you don’t mind I’m really tired so...”

“Of course, dear. Sleep well.”

“Good night, mom.” Abigail turned to enter her room when Caroline spoke up again.

“Good night, (Y/n).” Caroline crossed her arms, waiting for a response.

“...Good night, Caroline.” (Y/n) called meekly from out of sight, making Caroline smile, satisfied that her suspicions were correct.

“Behave yourselves, alright? I could hear a pin drop from the store front.”

“Mom!” Abigail said, aghast by what her mother was insinuating. “It’s just a sleepover.”

“It most certainly will be, or Ms. (Y/n) will find herself walking back home in the middle of the night,” Caroline threw her voice, talking behind Abigail rather than to her, “You’re welcome to stay for breakfast as long as there is no funny business.”

“Mom!” Abigail repeated again, more indignant than the last.

“...Thank you. That sounds lovely.”

“Alright, good night girls.” Caroline kissed the top of Abigail’s head, then shuffled back into her bedroom, turning the lights off behind her and leaving her door open just a hair.

Abigail shook her head before retreating into her room, making sure the sound of her door closing was audible in hopes of spiting her mother in some way. She saw (Y/n) already sitting on her bed with some borrowed pajamas on, looking embarrassed but also wide-eyed. Like she had heard something that had surprised her, something she hadn’t expected.

“Sorry, you know how my parents are.” Abigail grumbled looking through her pajamas to see what she would sleep in for the night.

“You... I’ll wait for you to change.”

Abigail rose a brow at (Y/n) but easily returned to her task, throwing her dirty clothes into her hamper before flopping down on the bed beside (Y/n), causing the springs of the mattress to creak loudly.

The sound made both the girls wince, and although they had done nothing wrong, the anxiously looked to the door, listening for anything that wasn’t just the house settling. Once they seemed to be in the clear, (Y/n) pulled Abi close so she could whisper urgently in her ear.

“You told your parents we went to Zuzu City to see a movie?”

“Yeah,” Abigail answered smoothly as if it wasn’t a big deal, “like they’d ever agree to me going out to the desert.”

“You told me they were cool with it! That’s why I let you come in the first place. I should have known!” (Y/n) whispered harshly, struggling to keep her voice low. “What if you had been in my boots, as hurt as I am? Your parents would have never let me see you again if I dragged you here like you had to do for me.”

“That’s not their choice to make. I’m tired of them telling me what I can and can’t do. Sometimes it’s better to just tell them what they want to hear, and see? Everything worked out. I do the same thing when I go to gigs with Sam and Seb at run down bars in the shady parts of the city.”

“Are you going to make a habit of lying to me too?” (Y/n) frowned.

“(Y/n), no.” Abigail frowned in return, cupping (Y/n)’s cheek. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have lied to you about my parents. I just, I really wanted to go out on an adventure with you. I wanted to show you how much I had grown since being a trembling little baby cowering away from the bats in the mines. The last thing I meant to do was hurt you. I’m sorry.”

(Y/n)’s eyes scanned over Abigail’s before she closed them and nodded slowly, “Okay, I forgive you. But please, don’t lie to me ever again.”

“I won’t. Promise.” Abigail nodded, resting her forehead against(Y/n)’s.

“And work on being more truthful to your parents. Start small of you must.”

“Ugh, fine. Don’t blame me if they won’t ever let me leave the house. I’ll wave at you longingly from the balcony when you pass through town.” Abigail muttered dramatically, making (Y/n) giggle and pull Abigail down to lay in the bed with her.

“I’ll be sure to work on my throwing arm so I can still give you pumpkins.” (Y/n) smiled, shifting the duvet out from under them so they could snuggle in.

“Aren’t you sweet,” Abigail wiggled closer, “perhaps that old ouija board was right.”

“How come you’re allowed to talk about the ouija board, but I’m supposedly pretend like it never happened?”

“Because it’s my embarrassing story so only I have the authority to bring up.”

“Is that how that works now?”

“Yes.”

“Hm.” (Y/n) shrugged.

They were quiet for awhile then, breathing evenly. (Y/n) had almost thought Abigail had beaten her to sleep when she suddenly spoke again.

“I’m also really, really sorry about the bomb and, well, everything that happened immediately after.” Abigail said, absently rubbing the sleeve of the shirt (Y/n) was wearing between her fingers.

“It’s alright,” (Y/n) yawned, “it was an accident after all. Try not to dwell on it. I’ve blown myself up on accident plenty of times before hand.”

Abigail smushed (Y/n)’s face between her hands, making her lips protrude like a fish, “Don’t say I’m turning into my parents when I say this, but I forbid you from going into the Skull Cavern ever again. Stick to the mines.”

“But, iridium.” (Y/n) protested, though her face was still being squished.

“You have that weird cat statue and those purple sea cucumbers. You’ll get by.” Abigail replied, leaving no room for argument, making (Y/n) whine. She kissed the pouty lips, sliding her hands off to rest one on her pillow and the other on (Y/n)’s collar bone. “Now we have to get some sleep. We’ll need all the energy we can get to deal with my parents in the morning now that sneaking you out of the house isn’t an option.”

“I am really tired,” (Y/n) yawned again, “you better fill me in on what movie we supposedly went to though. I’m sure that will be a whole discussion.”

“Oh yeah, I should do that, shouldn’t I?”

Abigail and (Y/n) settled into more comfortable positions, a few more kisses were shared before they finally drifted off in each other’s arms to the sounds of David the guinea pig rustling in his enclosure.

#stardew valley x reader #stardew valley oneshots #sv abigail #stardew valley abigail #abigail x reader #sv abigail x reader

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1heartsickfics · 3 years

Text

Drunk boyfriend

So we were hanging out and drinking with a group of friends from work. One of the guys brought his beer bong, so him and Carter both chugged a four locos, which is like actual trash alcohol for those of you who don't know. They're 14% alc and taste like battery acid.

The other guy immediately bent over and puked but Carter held his down. He sat down next to me with a hand on his stomach. "I feel like my insides are on fire," he said.

"I can't imagine why," I joked, nudging him with my shoulder a little. I was worried about him but I knew better than to ask him if he was okay in front of everyone.

"Dude that fucking killed me," the other guy, Devon, said once he finished throwing up.

Carter pressed his fist into his stomach, forcing up a loud burp. "Dude yeah I feel like I have a lead ball in my stomach," he agreed.

They both continued drinking immediately though. Devon started in on one of the beers he bought while Carter opened a twisted tea, which I'd already drank one of.

After a few sips though, he handed it to me. "Want some?" he asked.

I nodded, taking it from him and taking a sip. What he meant was that he needed a break but didn't want to say it out loud. I ended up finishing it for him, although not long after him and Devon bonged a beer each.

Now, Carter's a pretty big guy, although he's thin, so he can hold his alcohol pretty well. He can drink a lot and be okay. But he doesn't usually drink fast, and he doesn't usually drink beer. So that kinda did him in.

After that, he was drunk, I could tell. He's the kind of person who's usually still pretty functional even when he'd drunk. He can usually walk and talk mostly normally. But he was drunk. He was talking silly and stumbling around.

I was somewhere between drunk and tipsy after the next drink I had. I was also a little bit high after taking a few hits from my friend's vape.

That was when everyone decided that we should play kickball in the parking lot even though it was 1 am and raining. So we played kickball for about an hour. Or tried to anyway. When everyone's drunk and/or stoned it's a little difficult lol.

By the time we finished the game, everyone was exhausted and sweating our asses off, so we decided to call it a night and head home. Carter and I both lived close and had walked there, so after saying bye to everyone we started walking.

We didn't make it very far though before Carter grabbed my arm and tugged on it a little. When I turned to look at him he was slightly bent over, looking sweaty and pale in the light from the street lamp.

"Can we sit for a sec?" he asked, sounding out of breath.

"Yeah, of course," I said, leading him over to the grass next to the sidewalk. He immediately laid down, pulling me down with him. So we just laid in the grass for a minute.

"Spinny," he said, "I'm so drunk."

"Yeah I know, do you want to stay at my place tonight?" I asked. He has a habit of getting panicky when he's too drunk.

"Mmmhmm," he agreed, rolling over to press his face into my shoulder.

"Ready to get going?" I asked after a minute.

"Ughhhh yeah," he huffed, sitting up and flopping forward.

"Come on drunky," I said, standing up and holding my hands out to help him up.

We made it about halfway to my apartment that time before he stopped me again. This time when I turned to look at him I could tell he was very not okay. He was looking pretty sickly.

"I need to sit down," he said.

"Okay, come here," I grabbed his hand and pulled him over to a bench that was near the sidewalk.

As soon as we sat down he leaned over, dropping his head into his hands. I put my hand on his back, rubbing up and down.

"I feel sick,"

"Yeah I know, I'm sorry," I said sympathetically. I've definitely been there, a lot more times than he has.

"Oh god," he cut himself off with a gag, "I'm gonna throw up."

"Hey, you're okay, I'm right here," I said softly, scooting a little closer and wrapping my arm around him.

He dry heaved over the ground for a few minutes but didn't actually bring anything up. Once he was able to breath normally again he slumped against my side, burying his face in my shoulder.

"Alright, let's try walking again okay? We need to get you in bed," I said, trailing my fingers up and down his back and leaning my head against his.

"Hnnggg mmkay," he slurred, sounding more drunk by the minute. I wrapped my arm around his waist and stood up, pulling him with me. I picked up his phone and his keys from where he'd left them on the bench, stuffing them into my purse with my own stuff.

"Come on, I've got you," I said, keeping my arm around him, my hand resting on his hip.

"I dn't feel s'good Summer" he groaned, leaning against my side.

"I know, we'll take it slow I promise," I said, doing my best to support his weight as he leaned more and more of it against me.

"I can't dothis," he slurred, feet dragging on the concrete as he slowed.

"We're almost there Carter. You'll feel much better once you're laying down in bed," I pressed my hand against his back, urging him forward.

By the time we made it to my apartment he was practically in tears and had most of his body weight leaning on me. I unlocked my door and dragged him inside and onto my bed.

“Just relax okay? I’ll be right back,” I said, squeezing his hip before heading into the kitchen. I got us some water and grabbed a trash can then walked back to my room.

“Summer I feel sick,” he said as soon as I sat down on the bed.

“Sit up and take a drink for me, it might help,” I said.

He whined and thrashed around a bit but slowly maneuvered himself up into a sitting position. He took the glass from me, spilling some of it on both of us in the process, but he managed to take a few sips. I drank a bit myself, then took both cups and set them on my nightstand.

“Alright, now lay down with me,” I said, wrapping my arm around his shoulder and pulling him down with me. He curled up to my side, laying his head on my chest and draping an arm over me. After a moment he pressed himself even closer, tightening his arm around me and tucking his hand under my shoulder. I brought my hand up to rest on the back of his head, running my fingers through his hair.

"Shh, you're okay, this feeling will pass," I said quietly, leaning my head against his.

"M'nauseous," he moaned, squirming in discomfort.

"Just try to breathe through it," I said, "but there's a trash can on the floor beside the bed if you need to be sick," I added.

"Don't wanna-" he cut himself off with a burp, which he muffled into my shirt.

"I know, hopefully you won't have to," I said.

He almost never gets sick from drinking. Even when he drinks way too much he's usually able to hold it down. In fact I think the only time i've ever seen him throw up from drinking he ended up actually being sick.

Unfortunately however, that was not the case. A couple of minutes later he burped again, long and low, then groaned under his breath. He rolled off of me and pushed himself up, swaying as he tried to sit.

"Hey.." I sat up too, moving to sit slightly behind him, one hand resting on his back, waiting for what we both knew was going to happen.

He took a slow, forced breath, sounding shaky. I scooted closer, looping an arm around his chest to help steady him as he leaned over the side of the bed.

"You're okay, just keep breathing. I've got you," I said softly.

He pitched forward and coughed, which morphed into a dry heave. After a gasping breath in his body convulsed again, this time bringing up a wave of alcohol into the trash can on my floor. He moaned, slumping forward with another wave.

I moved to sit behind him, with one leg on either side, so I could wrap both of my arms around him and make sure he didn't fall off the bed. I could feel him shaking as I pressed myself up against his back.

"Easy, Carter, you're doing great, it'll be over soon," I told him.

After coughing up one more mouthful of puke and belching queasily he seemed to be done. I pulled him back away from the edge of the bed to rest against my chest. He leaned against me limply, head lolling to lay back on my shoulder. I turned and pressed a kiss to his forehead, wrapping him up in my arms and rocking him a little bit.

"Think you're done?" I asked after a minute.

"Hmm," he answered noncommittally.

"You want to try another sip of water? Get the taste out of your mouth?" I asked.

He groaned out an answer that I'm pretty sure meant no, but I reached to grab the glass anyway, pressing it into his hand.

"Just a little sip, please," I urged him.

He accepted the glass with shaky hands, bringing it hesitantly up to his lips to take a small drink. I took it back from him and set it down, wrapping my arms around him again.

"How are you feeling now?" I asked.

"Drunk."

"Spinning still?"

"Yeah kind of," he sighed. He wasn't slurring his words anymore at least so he was probably coming down now that he got some of it out of his system.

"How's your stomach?" I asked.

"Still sick," he shrugged, "Less nauseous though I think."

"Okay, well that's good at least. Do you think you could try to fall asleep? I'll put something on TV and we can stay up as long as you need to but it would be good to try and sleep this off," I suggested.

He rolled over onto his side, facing away from me, but scooted back until he was pressed up against my front. I snaked my arm over his waist and he grabbed my hand, moving it to rest over his stomach.

"Will you stay like this?" he asked sleepily.

"Of course, I've got you," I whispered, leaning over him slightly to kiss his cheek before laying back down.

He squirmed around for a little bit but was able to fall asleep pretty fast. The next morning however he did not feel good either...

#irl story #irl boyfriend story #tw vomit #vomit trigger warning #drunk #drunk vomit #stomach ache #sick stomach #nauseous

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cutethingstolove · 3 years

Text

The Sleepover

Photos From @little-stephanies-diary, Part 11

On the drive home from the mall, Stephanie’s mind was consumed with arguments she could make to her dad so she wouldn’t have to wear a diaper during her sleepover. Knowing how firm her dad could be, she also ran through a few scenarios of how she could hide her diaper if her dad didn’t change his mind. While pondering her options, she glanced at the cute pink teddy bear she had buckled into the passenger seat. She was really in love with her new bear, but decided she needed to find a name for it. She didn’t need much time to think before she came up with the perfect name: Vincent. Maybe she could even use Vincent to help convince her dad she didn’t need to wear a diaper during her sleepover!

Pulling into the driveway, Stephanie had come up with a plan just hoping it would work, but she had a backup plan just in case. She went to her trunk to grab her new clothes before grabbing Vincent from the front seat and headed towards the front door. As she grabbed the door knob, she paused for a minute to compose herself before turning the knob and walking inside. Standing in the entryway, closing the door behind her, she yelled out, “Daddy! I brought someone home I’d like you to meet!”

A little startled, her dad rose from the couch and looked into Stephanie’s eyes as her head poked around the corner, “You want me to meet someone honey?,” he asked.

“Yup!,” Stephanie beamed with glee, “This is my new friend Vincent!”

“Well hi Vincent,” her dad said with a hint of relief as Stephanie showed him her new teddy bear.

“I’m glad you approve!,” Stephanie smiled, “I’m going to go put him in my room along with my new clothes. I’ll be right back in a minute though, I have something important I need to ask you.”

Not knowing what to expect, her dad sat back down on the couch as Stephanie made her way upstairs to her room. When she reached her room, she set Vincent down gently on the bed before putting her new clothes on hangers in the closet. She was really excited to wear her cute new outfit next weekend when she would, hopefully, no longer have to wear diapers. She was sick of being forced to wear diapers every day, but she had to admit to herself that they had been pretty useful a couple of times. She left her room and headed back downstairs taking a seat on the couch next to her dad hearing an audible squish as her wet diaper hit the cushion.

“Sounds like it was a good idea to wear that diaper today princess,” her dad said lovingly, “Now what did you want to talk about.”

“Well daddy,” Steph said with a hint of embarrassment, “I sort of invited Courtney over for a sleepover tonight. I was hoping you would let me pause this ‘potty training’ for the night so she doesn’t find out.”

“Sweetheart, you know that wasn’t the deal we made,” he responded firmly.

“But daddy!,” Steph squealed in argument, “I haven’t had an accident in four days! It’s not fair!”

“The fair is in the summer honey,” he joked, “But in my house, rules are rules and you will follow them.”

Not wanting to cancel on Courtney, Stephanie resorted to Plan B simply saying, “Well, can you change me before she gets here? Maybe I can hide the diaper under my pajamas, but I would need the same deal as today that I won’t have any days added if I can’t use the bathroom.”

“That sounds fair,” he responded, “I’ll go make dinner quick and I’ll change you when we are done.”

Feeling a little dejected, Stephanie had at least found a way to keep her plans for the night. She decided that she needed to find some pajamas she was absolutely sure would hide her diaper from Courtney, and went to her room to look for something as her dad went to make dinner. Stephanie started digging through her dresser and couldn’t find anything that she was positive would hide her diaper. Worried, she started to go through her closet looking for anything that would work finally finding a pair of pink drop-seat footed pajamas she had bought a couple years earlier for Spirit Week at school. They were very childish, but they were loose enough that they would do the trick in hiding her diaper that night. She tossed them on the bed next to Vincent, and noticed the cute bowtie he had, and thought it would be super cute if she found bow for her hair. She went back to her dresser and found a pink bow that would match her footed pajamas, and tossed it on the bed before heading downstairs to eat.

Dinner went by without much incident, Stephanie and her dad talking casually about her day shopping. She mentioned the cute outfits she had seen in the store where she bought Vincent, hinting the entire time that they would make wonderful gifts for Valentine’s Day. Her and her dad always exchanged gifts on Valentine’s Day, and even though she normally only bought a card and some inexpensive ties, he had always bought her much nicer things. She always felt spoiled when her dad bought her gifts as he always spent way more than she thought was reasonable, but he enjoyed watching her smile as she opened her presents.

As soon as they finished eating, Steph’s dad told her he would take care of the dishes so she could go upstairs and prepare for her sleepover. Stephanie went up to her room, and realized she needed to go pee again, but not wanting to go into the bathroom only to be changed into another diaper right away, she took off her shortalls and sat down on her bed and used her diaper for the third time. Just as the last drops trickled out, her dad entered her room and they went through their routine of him putting a fresh dry diaper on her. As he was taking her wet diaper off, he made a quick comment about just how full it was which instantly made Stephanie blush with embarrassment. As soon as her new diaper was on, her dad left the room and Stephanie pulled on her footed pajamas and affixed the bow in her hair before laying down on her bed and texting Courtney asking when she would be over.

Courtney texted back saying she would be over in just a few minutes, so Stephanie decided to head downstairs and make some popcorn while she waited. Right as the microwave beeped letting her know the popcorn was done, the doorbell rang. Stephanie quickly made her way to the front door and greeted Courtney with a big hug inviting her inside. Courtney asked why Steph was already in her pajamas, and Stephanie lied saying that she wanted to change after shopping and thought it would be easiest to just put on her PJs right away. Satisfied with the answer, Courtney said she was going to go change too and took her bag upstairs only to come back downstairs a couple minutes later in a pair of light blue sweatpants and a long white t-shirt.

The girls sat down on the couch with a bowl of popcorn between them, and put a movie on. Knowing that the girls liked to be left alone during sleepovers, Stephanie’s dad went upstairs to his room to give them some privacy. The girls weren’t really too interested in the movie, but spent the next couple of hours gossiping about school, the boys they thought were cute, the girls they thought were mean, and the teachers they both had that semester. Just as the movie came to an end, they decided it was time for bed and they both made their way up to Stephanie’s room. Just as they normally did during sleepovers, the girls shared a bed, but Stephanie made sure to keep Vincent between them just in case Courtney accidently felt her diaper under her pajamas.

“Is that the same teddy bear that was in that shop today?,” Courtney asked curiously.

“Yeah,” Steph responded a little sheepishly, “I thought he was kind of cute, so I went back and bought him when I went back to grab my keys earlier.”

“I’m a little jealous,” Courtney replied, “I was tempted to buy that as well, but I didn’t want to spend any more time in that store. What do you mean when you said ‘him’?”

“Well,” Stephanie said perking up a bit, “I decided he needed a name, so I’d like you to meet Vincent!”

“I love the name!,” Courtney said excitedly, “Can we both cuddle with him tonight?”

“Absolutely!,” Steph said a little relieved, “We can make a Vincent sandwich!”

Thrilled with the idea, Courtney quickly agreed, but stood up and told Steph she needed to use the bathroom quick before bed. Steph understood, as she needed to pee as well, but let Courtney leave the room before she rolled onto her back and used her dry diaper knowing she wouldn’t be able to use the bathroom otherwise. It was also the best opportunity to do so with Courtney out of the room. When Courtney returned, she shut off the lights and crawled under the covers wrapping her arm around Vincent. Stephanie rolled over as she cuddled up next to her teddy bear and her best friend before the two girls began to doze off. Things had been working out pretty well so far for Stephanie, she just needed to keep up the charade until Courtney left in the morning.

To Be Continued…

#ab/dl #ab/dl girl #diapered #diapered girl #ab/dl caption #ab/dl story

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outerbankspreferences · 3 years

Text

50 wordless ways to say I love you.

#3. Traveling long distance just to see them.

Word count: 2040

Warnings: mentions of sex.

A/N: So I know nothing about filming, and I’m sorry it took me so long to update, but I’ve been sick. Hope you like it <3 :)

MASTERLIST

SERIES MASTERLIST

It had been a great week. You had gotten all your assignments done and handed in on time for once. You had time to deep clean your apartment and so much needed laundry. Why were you doing all this, because your boyfriend Drew had the weekend off from filming and he was going to make the four- and half-hour drive from Charleston to the Chapel Hill campus to be with you. You guys had been dating for little over a year, but you weren’t ready to move in with him just yet. He was your first serious boyfriend and you wanted to take things slow. You were also 4 years younger than Drew and felt it a little intimidating moving in with him just yet. Of course, he was supportive of that. You laugh to yourself thinking about how nervous you were when you two first started seeing each other. You had gone to high school with Maddy Cline, and when she went to university out west you kept in touch. You were the first person she told about wanting to be an actor, and you supported her dream 100%. She was the one who introduced you and Drew. She always joked that she was your guy’s cupid.

As you were hopping out the shower, wrapping your hair in a towel you heard your phone ringing. Rushing to kitchen to get you saw a picture of Drew show up, he was trying to facetime you. “Hey love, what’s up?” You ask him. It was unusual for him to be calling you this late. You take a good look at his face. There were bags under his eyes, and he had some stubble where he hadn’t shaved. You wonder if that was for his character. “I’m just getting back from supper with the cast. I miss you.” He spoke into the phone. Austin must have been sleeping because Drew spoke quietly. “Is everything okay love? You seem off.” He looked away from the screen, even when you weren’t physically with him you could still tell when something was up. You did this with everyone, not just him, but Drew thought it was your superpower. “Just a rough week with filming, and honestly I don’t feel very good, I think I’m just tired, but I don’t know.” He sat the phone, so it was propped up, rubbing his face with his hands. “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that Drew, just wait a couple of days and you can come down here for a little break. I promise nothing but movies and snuggles.” You told him with hope in your voice. His face falls when he sees how excited you are. He was dreading making this call all day. “Yeah about that,” he trailed off. You sigh, “you can’t make it, can you?” He looked at you and instantly felt worse. “No, I thought we were going to have the weekend off, but I guess we’re behind schedule. Which I find crazy because we’ve been working our asses off all week.” He laughed trying to brighten the mood. “Maybe next weekend love, I’ll try and make it down. I’m sorry I know you were looking forward to it.” You put on a fake smile for him. He was already feeling shitty, and you weren’t going to add to his problems. “That’s okay, I have to work next weekend, but maybe I can switch my shifts around.” You send him a reassuring smile. “Go get some sleep babe, what time do you work in the morning?” “We have to be on set by 9:30.” “Okay, well I have class tomorrow, so I’ll talk you then. I love you, get some sleep.” You told him. Drew was half falling asleep talking to you. “Yeah your right love, have a good day, I love you more.” With that you hung up the phone. To say that you were disappointed was an understatement. You had been looking forward to seeing Drew all week, but you also felt bad because he was sick. Drew always took such good care of you when you weren’t feeling 100%. You decided he needed you there with him. You find your group chat with the girls and send them off a message.

Y/N: Hey guys, I heard you’ve been having a long week filming, but I need to ask a tiny favor of you.

MB: Ugh, you have no idea, I’m so tired I think I’ve been sleepwalking the whole day.

MC: I agree, this has been a week from hell, Chase got home and went straight to bed. What do you need Y/N?

Y/N: Well as you guys know, Drew was going to come down this weekend but now he can’t. So I was thinking of catching the bus down Friday and surprising him. But I need to know his schedule.

MC: YOU GUYS ARE TOO MUCH! Of course, we can help you with that. He’s filming with me a lot this weekend, so maybe be down for Friday night, our last call time is 5, and hopefully it won’t take more than an hour or so.

MB: I will be so happy not to listen to him go on about how much he misses you. He was so sad when he found out we would be filming through the weekend.

Y/N: Okay perfect, I’ll get Austin to pick me up from the bus station and I’ll wait at their place for him to get home. You guys are the best!

MC: Maybe we can all go get supper Saturday night, at the new bar we found. Everyone misses you.

MB: OMG I forgot about that place, yeah, we should go, Y/N you love it, they have half priced shots on Saturdays.

Y/N: Yeah okay, I’ll see what Drew wants to do and I’ll get back to you.

You were so excited. You went online and bought a bus ticket for Friday after you last class. It was a 5-hour drive because you would have to switch buses, but for Drew it was worth it. You packed your bag and planned with Austin for him to pick you up around 5:30. He promised to keep it a secret and was happy Drew wouldn’t be moping around the apartment.

When you get ready for your class that morning you just put on a cardigan, some leggings and put your hair in a ponytail. Austin had texted you saying that everyone was excited to see you and Drew was oblivious to what was being planned. Drew had also texted you that day, telling you to have a good day and he would try and call you that night. You could hardly sit through your class always checking the time. Once your class was over, you walked home and grabbed you stuff to catch the bus. Once you got on and settled you put your headphones in and slept the whole way. As promised Austin was at the bus station waiting for you. “Hey Y/N” he greeted engulfing you in a hug. You laugh “Hi Austin, thanks for picking me up, is Drew still filming?” “Uh yeah he is! Maddie said that they were going to be done around 6. You guys should have the place to yourselves, I’m going to stay at Rudy’s tonight.” You felt bad, you didn’t want to kick him out of his own home. “Austin you didn’t have to do that! I didn’t want to put anyone out. I was just worried about him. Is he still sick?” He laughed at you. “No I’m good, I don’t need to hear you and Drew go at it tonight, and I think he was a bit better today. If you ask me, I think everything is getting to him. He misses you; he misses his family; he’s working like none stop right now. I think he just needs some sleep.” You nodded along with everything Austin said. If there was one person who knew Drew better, then you it was him. They’d been roommates since filming season one after you and Drew decided to wait to move in together. You had become surprisingly good friends with Austin, and he would always third wheel you guys. “Wait, he’s not sleeping?” It caught you off guard, Drew never had trouble sleeping. A trait of his you were always jealous of. “Yeah well he never sleeps great without you anyways or at least that’s what he tells me.” You never knew that. You would spend a week at time with Drew, you guys would flip between each other places always spending the night together. You had to admit, you did sleep much better wrapped up in his arms.

Austin dropped you off at the apartment. “Are sure your okay sleeping at Rudy’s tonight Austin. I’m sure if Drew’s tired nothing’s going to happen.” He was putting your bag down, grabbing a drink out of the fridge. “Yeah, I’m sure, him and Elaine finally got together so he’s been sleeping at her place. I’m just going to watch the game or something.” You smiled, those two had been pining over each other for months. You had seen some pictures on Instagram and was happy they finally made it official.

Austin left you at the apartment waiting for Drew to get back. You put your stuff in his room and decided to make something to eat. If Drew were sick you wanted to make something that would make him feel better. Looking through his pantry you found some cans of soup and decided that would be perfect. He should be home anytime so it would be ready for him when he got there. You put on your Spotify playlist and started cooking. You were so focused on what you were doing that you never heard Drew unlock the door. He had to look twice when he saw you facing away from him making food slightly dancing in spot while you cooked. He was glad it wasn’t Austin cooking for once. “Y/N, what are you doing here? I missed you so much.” He came up hugging you from behind. You jumped a little. “Christ Drew, for being so big you’re awfully quite.” He laughed kissing you. You finally get a good look at him for the first time in a couple of weeks. He looked terrible the bags under his eye were worse, he was pale, and when you put your hand to his forehead, he had a fever. “Drew Starkey, you are running a fever, why didn’t you tell me it was this bad. I’m making you some soup go lay down on the couch until its done.” You scold him. He knew better then to let things get this bad.

Once the soup was warmed up you put it into some bowls and brought it over to him on the couch. He had turned on Netflix and was watching a crime documentary. “Babe you didn’t have to do all this, I’m fine, really. Just a bit of a cold nothing I can’t handle on my own.” “Clearly, I can tell you’re getting much better. Just eat this and we can cuddle after words.” You reply to him with sarcasm. Drew didn’t know how he got so lucky. For the rest of supper, you guys made small conversation. He asked about the bus ride and how school was going, and you asked about filming. Once the two of you were done eating you put the dishes in the sink, they could wait to be washed in the morning. You came back and laid down on the couch opting to the big spoon. Grabbing a blanket and wrapping Drew up to keep him warm. “Where’s Austin?” he asked. He noticed that his roommate wasn’t home, “oh he’s sleeping at Rudy’s tonight. He didn’t want to listen to us having sex.” Drew laughed and his breath tickled your chest making you giggle. “I’m too tired for sex tonight maybe tomorrow.” You looked down at him he was staring at the television half asleep. “Get some rest love you need it.” And with that Drew slept better than he had weeks.

#drew starkey #drew outerbanks #drew starkey blurb #drew imagine #drew starkey x you #drew-starkey-imagine #drew starkey x reader #outer banks

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malewifegradyruewen · 3 years

Text

Ceux Qui Ne Meurent Jamais

i created the google doc less than three hours ago i-

if any of y'all speak french and notice that the title is weird please lemme know, i used google translate but sometimes that sucks-

next | masterpost

trigger warnings: none, ask to tag

word count: 1317

tagging: @fire-sapphics @zoyyanazyalensky @dirty-racoon @della-vacker-supremacy @raiinyrxse @lucat13 @tiergan-andrin-alenefar @genyyasafin @cadence-talle @thewhiteblades and lmk if you want to be added/removed!!

The tall doors of the manor were nothing short of intimidating, and Nathalie had been standing outside for almost ten minutes, too afraid to knock. The air reeked of disregard and disrepair. Nathalie knew that education of the self was an unpopular stage, and many of the others had just cycled out of it, but she hadn’t expected Marchant Manor to be so silent. Even though the superior at the child’s manor had informed Nathalie that there would be two other ladies there, it seemed to her that Lady Sylviane had been wrong. The house seemed all but abandoned.

She stood outside a few minutes longer, wishing her childhood friends would have chosen education of self as well. Viviane and Roselyne had selected exploration, and Ivanna and Nadine had picked discovery. The five of them had made up one of the largest classes at Hazelford Children’s Manor, but they’d announced their separate paths at their going-away party. Nathalie could still taste the sweet chocolate cake and the bitter wine they’d been fed. It was hard to believe that had been only two days before.

The wind blew colder, and Nathalie drew her cloak up closer to her face. If only stage cycles didn’t happen in the coldest part of the fall. She couldn’t deny that part of her was also nervous to knock for fear of those who lived there, but the cold chilling her to the bone overruled any fear she had before. With one hand, she reached out to grab the ornate brass knocker and knocked it three times.

Barely a moment had passed before the door flew open. Behind it stood a woman wearing her dark hair pulled back into a bun that was starting to fall out. Her deep red blouse and brown skirt made Nathalie, in her pale blue child’s dress, feel inadequate. Although she didn’t look a day older than Nathalie, she knew that one of the ladies in the manor was one stage older than her, and the other three stages.

“Hello! You must be Lady Nathalie! Come in, out of cold!” the lady cried. Even as Nathalie stepped into the dark foyer, she could tell that this lady had a warm personality. “I’m Lady Lucie, second cycle.” She slammed the door shut, pushing it closed with all her might.

“Hello, I’m Nath-” she caught herself, remembering what Lady Sylviane had taught them. “Lady Nathalie. Pleased to make your acquaintance, Lady Lucie.”

“Oh,” Lady Lucie laughed. “You can do away with formality with me. It’s just me and Lady Brigid here, so I don’t mind. We’ve been here, just the two of us, for eight years. Education of self is a dying stage.”

“Ah,” Nathalie agreed. She wasn’t sure what else to say. It was clear that very few ladies chose education of self, and even fewer were sent to Marchant Manor. The crumbling stone building had clearly seen its glory days long ago.

She’d always thought the manor she’d grown up in was large, but Marchant Manor’s foyer alone was as large as the entire banquet hall of the children’s manor. What she also noticed was that the armchairs scattered around were all covered in heavy cloths, a visible layer of dust resting on top.

“Oh,” Lady Lucie said, following Nathalie’s gaze. “We don’t come here often. This manor is meant for thirty ladies, but there’s only three of us, so we closed off the rest of the house. There’s at least three sitting rooms that are closed off. We have three washrooms, four bedrooms, three sitting rooms, a library, a kitchen, a dining room, a banquet hall, and a ballroom that aren’t closed off. Speaking of, would you like to see your room?”

Nathalie nodded, and reached to the bags she’d set on the floor, but Lady Lucie was fast. “I can carry that,” Nathalie said as she picked up her remaining bag, but Lady Lucie was already partway up the grand staircase at the far end of the foyer. Nathalie followed after her, afraid to lose sight of her in the large building.

She tried to soak in every detail of the ornate house, from the carved stone staircase to the painted details on the ceiling, but Lady Lucie was almost out of sight, turning a corner just as Nathalie reached the top of the stairs. She jogged after her, turning to see a hallway with about a dozen closed doors, and a row of chairs set up about three doors down. They were covered in the same thick cloth as the armchairs downstairs.

One of the doors creaked open, and Nathalie realised it hadn’t been fully closed. She pushed it open to find Lady Lucie setting her bags down on a bench at the end of the four-poster bed. She turned to face Nathalie and said, “It’s not much, but it’s all yours.”

The room was huge, a four-poster bed with dark, silky curtains taking up only a fraction of the floor space. The tall windows looked out over the back garden, with a wooden desk under one window and a vanity under another. A forest green rug sat underneath the bed, extending several feet past it on all sides. The room was three times bigger than the bedroom she’d shared with Roselyne and Nadine at the children’s manor. She wasn’t sure if this manor was unusually large or the children’s manor unusually small, but it was certainly a change from the only place she’d ever known.

“This is wonderful, thank you,” she said, placing the remainder of her belongings on the bench Lady Lucie had already placed her things on. “Is there anything I need to know? When is supper?”

“Depends. We cook a roast on Sundays, and visit the market on Tuesday and Saturday, but it’s whenever you’d like most nights. I quite enjoy cooking breakfast, and we eat around nine in the morning, and then late lunch and dinner on our own usually. But tonight we’ll be eating together, all three of us. Supper will be at seven-thirty.” Lady Lucie spoke a mile a minute, but her words were crisp and clean, so Nathalie could hear every single one clearly. “If there’s anything you need, the kitchen is downstairs and down the hallway to your right. I’ll leave the door open. You might want to change before we eat, and I’d suggest we keep the formalities, at least for now. If that will be all, I’ll leave you to get settled.” With a small nod from Nathalie, Lady Lucie left, pulling the door shut behind her.

Nathalie stood in silence for a moment before walking and flopping onto the bed. Seven-thirty was a long time away, and the journey to Marchant Manor had been a long one. Her class had awoken before the sunrise, and left the children’s manor just as the sky was beginning to lighten. Even now, she could tell the sun was setting beyond the hills in the distance. The days were shorter but by no means had the day of travel been short itself. They’d been in a carriage for almost seven hours, with stops to deliver Nathalie’s former classmates to their respective manors, and so they could stretch their legs. Both of the manors before her stop had been large and beautiful, and her dismay at finding the decrepit manor she would be staying in had been immense.

She still wasn’t sure how she felt about the manor, or Lady Lucie. She didn’t even know the name of the other lady in the house. Hopefully, supper would provide a sense of enlightenment, but until then, she had little to do but take a nap. Nathalie removed her cloak, placed it on the bench at the end of her bed, crawled across the spacious bed, and lay down. Just a short nap so she wouldn’t fall asleep during supper.

#jolie's shitty writing #ceux qui ne meurent jamais #cqnmj

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shadowhuntertrash · 3 years

Text

High Notes

Chapter Eleven

Characters belong to Cassandra Clare

Thomas woke up to a knock on the door. He opened his eyes groggily and stretched, his eyes scanning the room to figure out where he was. He took in the small room that held a twin-sized bed and a small table. Ah right, tour.

The knock came again and Thomas cleared his throat slightly. “You can come in.” He said, his voice raspy from sleep. The door cracked open and Alastair’s bright face popped in. “Thomas, get up, get up. We’re almost to Phoenix.” Thomas laughed as Alastair jumped slightly in place, he looked like a child with a new toy and the thought only made Thomas laugh harder.

Alastair pouted and threw himself on Thomas’s bed. “Thomas, stop laughing, come on.” He said grabbing Thomas’s wrist and hauling him up. Thomas groaned and let his weight drop completely onto Alastair who shrieked and held him up to the best of his abilities.

Thomas laughed as Alastair’s arms got trapped and he fell back with Thomas on top of him. Alastair huffed but made no move to change their positions so Thomas let his eyes close again. “No, if you’re going to stay there you don’t get to go back to sleep. That means I have to sit here all by myself and die under your ginormous body.” Thomas laughed loudly and sat up.

“Are you calling me fat?” Alastair laughed and shook his head. “Not at all, you’re simply a very large, very tall person.” Thomas laughed and before he could think it through he smirked at Alastair. “Plus, I’m sure you don’t mind being under me all that much.” He snapped his mouth closed as he realized what he just said.

Alastair’s cheeks reddened and he just stared at Thomas for a few seconds before he threw his head back and laughed loudly. “God, Thomas. Warn a man before you make those jokes.” Thomas groaned and hid his face in Alastair’s chest.

He could feel Alastair’s chest shaking under him in silent laughs. Thomas decided he liked the feel of laughter but then again maybe it was just Alastair’s.

Thomas rolled off of him with a huff, missing the warmth he brought but not too keen on crushing Alastair before their first date.

The thought made him smile. Their first date. He was going on a date. With Alastair. He was going to go on a date with the first (and quite frankly only) boy he’d ever liked. Thomas turned to look at Alastair who had sat up and was now stretching.

He couldn’t help but remember all the times he’d thought of how perfect Alastair was, how much he wanted him when they were in school. Not much had changed besides the fact that they grew up and he understood that no one was perfect, we just had to love people despite and for their flaws.

Thomas wasn’t aware he was thinking so hard but soon enough Alastair was laying on him, his chin resting on his hands that he had folded on Thomas’s chest as he stared up at Thomas. “What are you thinking about so hard?” Thomas smiled down at him, wondering for what felt like the millionth time how Alastair made him feel so comfortable when he used to feel so uncomfortable.

Maybe not uncomfortable per se, more of a butterfly feeling that made his hands sweat when Alastair got too close. He could get used to this feeling, the comfort Alastair brought. He wanted to get used to it. He wanted Alastair to stay.

Thomas sighed inwardly, he was so screwed. Here he was hoping desperately that Alastair wouldn’t leave him when they hadn’t even gone on a date. They needed to go on a date.

He shuddered when he felt warm air passing his ear. Alastair leaned back down from where he had lifted himself up to blow gently against Thomas’s ear.

“What are you thinking about?” He asked again, a small smile gracing his face. Thomas liked that he got to see it, not many people did. “You. Me. Us.” Thomas said with a shrug, his eyes falling shut contentedly.

“I think about that too. We should go on our date today.” Alastair said, his hand coming up to play with Thomas’s brown hair. Thomas hummed in agreement, reveling in the bliss Alastair brought him.

The door opened behind them and they both turned around, surprised as neither of them had realized the bus had stopped. Cordelia was standing in the doorway, a smile on her dark lips as she smiled at them. “God, I feel like you two have already been dating for years. Hell, you act like you’ve already been dating for years.” Alastair and Thomas laugh as Alastair rolls off him and they both sit up.

“Are we here?” Alastair asked, his arms out as he stretched again as he yawned. Thomas looked away with a smile and heated cheeks. Cordelia gave him a knowing smile.

“Yeah, we’re here. Lucie and I are getting breakfast and the boys are getting ready but I’ll just leave you two.” She dropped a wink before stepping out of the room. Alastair sighed loudly as he flopped back on the bed. “Is it bad that I am equally torn between wanting to take you out on a date right now and going back to sleep for days?” Thomas laughed and shook his head as he stood up.

“Not at all. I, however, am going to get ready for the day seeing as someone has already woken me up.” Thomas said as he grabbed his clothes out of his bag. Alastair grumbled but made no move to get up from Thomas’s bed.

Thomas felt slightly disgusted as he dressed, he needed a shower but seeing as the bus was lacking one and he wasn’t in the mood to go to the hotel by himself, he just dressed and got ready without one. He had showered yesterday so honestly, it wasn’t that bad but he liked showering every morning.

About ten minutes later he walked back to his room and smiled quietly at the sight of Alastair sitting on his bed, his guitar on his lap as he scribbled something into a notebook. Thomas felt a hard flutter in his stomach at the sight of Alastair’s guitar pick hanging out of his mouth.

Thomas found himself trying to be as quiet as possible as he leaned on the door frame. Alastair dropped his notebook and went back to his guitar, humming and picking a few more notes before jotting them down in what Thomas assumed was his songwriting notebook. Alastair turned back to his guitar and picked a slow rhythm as he started to sing quietly.

You can count on me like one, two, three

I'll be there

And I know when I need it, I can count on you like four, three, two

And you'll be there

'Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh, yeah

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh, yeah, yeah

Alastair was about to go back to his notebook once again when he saw Thomas standing by the door. Alastair’s cheeks went red and he laughed quietly. “Hey.” He said, laying his guitar carefully on the bed next to him. Thomas raised an eyebrow.

“Oh, don’t get all shy about singing in front of me now, Alastair. It’ll be a long trip if you do.” Alastair laughed and shook his head. “New song?” Thomas asked as he sat next to him, Alastair smiled sweetly. “Yeah, it’s for Cordelia but it’s not nearly done yet.” Thomas smiled at his thoughtfulness before his phone pinged across the room.

Getting up with a groan, Thomas crossed the room to check his phone. It was from the group chat with Matthew, James, and Christopher.

Sid the Science Kid: Today’s a free day while they set up right?

Matthew Unfairchild: Basically, we have an hour of practice tonight but other than that yeah

King of the Ducks: Where’s Thomas?

Matthew Unfairchild: THOMAS YOU BUFFOON ARE YOU WITH ALASTAIR?!

Thomas laughed and rolled his eyes at his friend’s enthusiasm.

Thomas the Train: i am and i would like to say i’m muting you all today so i will see you all at rehearsal later

Thomas put the chat on mute and put his phone into his pocket. He reached his hands out to Alastair, who had put his guitar away, and pulled him up easily. Thomas made the split-second decision to pull Alastair into his chest instead of letting go.

He took great comfort in feeling Alastair’s heart beating as rapidly as his own. Alastair sighed quietly and wrapped his arms loosely around Thomas’s waist. “I could get used to this.” Alastair said quietly. Warmth spread through Thomas, a smile gracing his face as he soaked in the fact that Alastair (hopefully) would get used to this. He wanted this to be normal, wanted to memorize what it felt like to hold Alastair. He wanted all the soft times and all the crazy ones too. He wanted Alastair.

Thomas tightened his grip slightly around Alastair’s shoulders. “I want you to get used to this.” Thomas said quietly, resting his chin on Alastair’s dark hair. He loved that hair. Alastair leaned back enough to give him a soft look before bringing Thomas’s head down and planting a soft kiss on his forehead.

Alastair smiled at him again before pulling back. “We have all day and I have a few ideas for dates because knowing us and the fans at least one will get crashed.” Thomas felt his heart drop and his teeth automatically went to chew on his lips.

The fans. How could they go on a date without the fans knowing? How could they truly enjoy a date with Thomas having to look over his shoulder every few seconds? It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair to him or Alastair. What if Alastair changed his mind after going on the date? What if he saw how it would have to be with Thomas being closeted and change his mind?

“Thomas?” Alastair asked quietly, making his way back to Thomas who had gone stiff and silent. “Thomas?” Alastair asked again quietly, his hand coming up to gently tug Thomas’s lip from his teeth. It was bleeding now, Thomas could taste the copper but he ignored it in favor of looking at Alastair’s dark, concerned eyes.

“Sorry.” Thomas said. His voice was rough and he was shaking his head slightly as he swallowed roughly. Alastair moved his hand to cup Thomas’s cheek. “What just happened?” He asked quietly. Thomas closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, giving a small smile when Alastair moved to press their foreheads together.

“I’m sorry.” Thomas whispered again, his eyes falling closed at the calming pressure Alastair was giving. Alastair swiped his thumb across Thomas’s cheek, right under his eye. “What are you sorry about?” Thomas sighed, his heart stuttering loudly in his chest.

Before Thomas could second guess himself he leaned forward a fraction and captured Alastair’s lips with his own. Alastair gasped into it before bringing his other hand to Thomas’s face.

It wasn’t like the kisses you read about. It didn’t freeze time and his heart didn’t stop beating. It was messy and rushed, both anticipating the kiss for far too long. Thomas was hot all over and his heart was racing. Alastair licked the seam of his lips and Thomas hesitated only slightly before opening his mouth for Alastair to explore.

Thomas’s hands came up to Alastair’s neck, his thumbs running along Alastair’s jaw. Alastair’s hands had slipped to his hair, tugging in a way that drew a moan from Thomas. They broke away, both breathing heavily.

Alastair used his grip on Thomas’s hair to bring their foreheads together once more. Thomas let out a laugh as he flexed his fingers where they still rested on Alastair’s neck. “God,” Alastair said, his voice barely audible. Thomas laughed again and brought his head up to kiss Alastair’s forehead.

“Can’t we just skip the first date and you agree to be my boyfriend now?” Alastair whined slightly, his hands slipping down to wrap around Thomas’s waist as he hugged him close. Thomas laughed again, his mind still spinning from the kiss.

“One date and then you can ask me and I can guarantee you, you’ll like the answer.” Thomas mumbled into Alastair’s hair. Alastair just hummed contentedly and grabbed one of Thomas’s hands seemingly content to stand there and play with Thomas’s fingers.

“I hope you know that as much as I loved that kiss, I haven’t dropped the previous conversation.” Thomas sighed and closed his eyes. “I saw you spiral, what was it about?” Alastair asked quietly, his thumb running soothingly over Thomas’s palm.

Thomas pulled Alastair with him so they were once again sitting on the bed. “So much for getting ready.” Alastair just shrugged and tucked himself into Thomas’s side. Thomas ran his hand over Alastair’s side and smiled when he felt Alastair shudder against him. “Are you a koala? I didn’t think you’d be such a snuggler.” Alastair shifted so he could pout at Thomas. “I am a very clingy person, might as well get that out there now. I hate that word, by the way, snuggle,” Alastair’s face twisted up and all Thomas could think was adorable. “I am also offended that you think I can be distracted so easily.”

Rolling his eyes, Thomas shook his head. “I don’t think you’re easily distracted, I’m just postponing the inevitable.” Alastair nodded, a faint smile on his face. “Well then, do get along with it, Thomas.”

Thomas chuckled before going quiet as the worries creep back into his head. “I know you’re out and I’m proud of you for that, a lot of people are, but I’m not out.” Alastair sits up so he can see Thomas, leaving his side to sit criss-cross in front of him.

“And you’re worried that I’ll leave because you aren’t?” Thomas looked down at the sound of Alastair’s knowing voice. “Thomas, don’t you think that’s a little hypocritical of me? I wasn’t always out, I know what it’s like to fear everyone’s reactions. I know what it’s like to be closeted and to be in a closeted relationship. I’m not going to pressure you to do or say anything you aren’t comfortable with and I know how it’s going to be so stop worrying about it.”

Thomas gave Alastair an exasperated look. “Don’t you understand? It’s not fair to you. We would have to sit on opposite sides of the tables when we go out. We wouldn’t be able to kiss or hold hands, hell it would be sketchy to even hug in front of people.” Thomas bit his lip and started pulling the loose threads on the blanket. “I mean, Alastair, do you really want that? To hide?”

Alastair fixed Thomas with a hard look, his eyes narrowed but kind. He leaned forward and stopped when he was a few inches away from Thomas’s face. Both of their eyes traveled to the other’s lips.

“You’re worth it.” Alastair whispered as if saying it too loud would break the silent spell they were in. Thomas let his eyes flutter shut, the reassurance making him feel better than he thought he would even with the doubts still floating around in his head.

Alastair closed the distance between them and for the second time that day, they kissed.

It wasn’t rushed as the first one had been. It was slow, their lips molding against each other, slowly getting used to the fit of the other’s lips. Alastair’s hands came up to Thomas’s hair and he sighed into Thomas’s mouth before pulling back with a smile.

“Your hair’s so soft.” Thomas couldn’t help the laugh that came out and he brought his hands to Alastair’s dark locks. “So is yours.” Alastair smiled at him and they stood together in silence.

It wasn’t uncomfortable, it was quiet and comforting. Thomas couldn’t help feel relaxed when he was with Alastair. Maybe that was what was so addicting about him, the fact that he seemed to destroy any reason to be anxious or to stress. He was a drug.

“Back to the date thing, I think that one of my ideas will be right up your alley.” Thomas raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?” Alastair nodded and winked. “But you don’t get to know what it is until we’re there. You have rehearsal tonight, right?” Alastair asked as he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

Thomas nodded and Alastair smiled as he continued typing something with his phone. “Okay, then how do you feel about a shower and then a tour?” Thomas raised an eyebrow and didn’t even try to hide the curious look on his face.

“Tour of where?” Thomas asked, then laughed when Alastair huffed dramatically. “Questions later, fun now, Thomas.” He said exasperated. Thomas laughed again and let Alastair drag him into the sitting room of the bus.

“I’m going to get ready so you just sit here and I’ll be out in a second.” Thomas nodded and Alastair left him with a wink. Thomas smiled and found himself wondering what kind of adventure Alastair would be leading him on.

Thomas had a bunch of questions as to what they were doing and honestly, Alastair should have known that leaving Thomas to his thoughts for more than five minutes would lead to him overthinking.

“How are we going to get there? None of us brought our cars and honestly, I would prefer not to bring the bus.” Thomas said as soon as he and Alastair stepped out of the bus. Alastair laughed and clapped a hand onto his shoulder. Thomas was sure that if they weren’t in public Alastair would have grabbed his hand.

“I have a friend who lives up here who said I could borrow her car for the day. I’m lucky I caught her, she’s a travel photographer but we happened to be here at the same time.” Alastair said easily leading Thomas to where a baby blue slug bug was parked. A girl was standing next to it, she was around Alastair’s age with dark hair and dark eyes that lit up kindly.

She pushed off from where she was resting, propped up against her car, and held her hand out to Thomas. “I’m Ariadne, it’s nice to meet you finally, Alastair’s told me a lot.” Ariadne winked and seemed not to notice the way Thomas tensed significantly.

Alastair didn’t miss it and put a careful hand on Thomas’s shoulder. “Ari, that was unnecessary.” Alastair said but he had a smile on his face and Ariadne just squeaked and threw herself at him. Alastair laughed and hugged her back tightly.

Thomas smiled at the display and silently wondered where they had met. They both pulled back and Alastair shifted his smile to Thomas. “Thomas this is Ariadne Bridgestock, we met when she stayed with us for two days because the hotel was sold out and she was on a photography trip.”

Ariadne smiled at him again and Thomas smiled back, he didn’t know anything about her but she was the kind of person who you wanted to smile at. Alastair turned back to her. “What are you going to do while we’re out with your car?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

Ariadne wasn’t listening fully, her eyes were locked hungrily on something behind him but Thomas couldn’t figure out what since the only thing behind him was Lucie and Anna. “Someone.” She said distractedly in response to Alastair’s question. Thomas raised an eyebrow at Alastair who laughed loudly, drawing the attention of Anna and Lucie who were in a conversation.

Anna and Lucie both looked over and by the look on Anna’s face, Thomas guessed that it was Anna who had caught Ariadne’s attention. “I mean something!” Ariadne hurriedly corrected, her face a dark shade of red as she covered it with her hands.

Alastair’s laughter just grew louder and Thomas couldn’t help the smalls laughs that escaped him as well as he realized what was happening. Anna and Lucie came up to them, both all smiles. “Ariadne dear, it’s been far too long.” Anna said with a wink that didn’t go unnoticed by anyone.

Lucie looked at Thomas with a raised eyebrow before pointedly looking between the two other women. “I’m sorry, I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Lucie, Anna’s cousin.” Lucie said, her hand stretched out in front of her for Ariadne to shake. Ariadne took it easily, her dark eyes shining. “It’s wonderful to meet you, I’m Ariadne.”

Once the introductions were done there was an awkward silence as Anna and Ariadne stared at each other. Thomas could cut the air of sexual tension with a knife. Lucie, Alastair, and Thomas all shared amused glances as the women continued to have a silent conversation.

“As lovely as this is, Thomas and I are going to get going.” Alastair said with his eyes still locked on Anna and Ariadne, his face full of amusement. Lucie raised an eyebrow at Thomas and he had to look away from her knowing look before the blush overtook his face completely. “Oh? And where are you two going?”

Thomas watched her with careful eyes. Alastair turned to Thomas and stayed silent letting Thomas answer however he wanted.

“We’re going on an adventure but don’t bring it up with the boys. If they ask, it’s fine don’t lie but if they don’t go out of their way to ask just don’t bring it up.” Lucie’s smug look softened and she nodded. “Of course.” She said before walking up to him and hugging him tightly. “Love you, darling. Have fun and be careful.” She said, pulling back.

Thomas smiled and kissed her forehead. “Always am.” He said before turning to Alastair and flashing him a smile as he walked to the car.

Anna was now dragging Ariadne somewhere, both of them laughing. Lucie sighed and rolled her eyes. “Guess I’ll go find Cordelia.” She said with a fond shake of her head. “Or Jesse.” Thomas said with a wink before climbing into the car.

His knees were far too close to his chest and he couldn’t help but realize just how small this car was for a person as tall as him.

Alastair got into the driver's seat and took one look at Thomas before laughing hysterically. Thomas pouted and slumped in his seat, still towering over Alastair. “Shut up, it’s not my fault this car is tiny.” Alastair just laughed harder, tears of laughter falling down his face. Thomas liked the fact that he could make Alastair laugh like that, even if it was at his own expense.

Alastair started the car and wiped his eyes dramatically as his laughter died down. Thomas just glared with no venom and turned to the radio. He turned the volume up and cringed when he heard his own song coming through the speakers and changed the channel. Alastair glanced at him before turning his eyes back to the road.

“Not one to listen to your own music?” He asked as he drummed his fingers on the steering wheel in time with the song. Thomas laughed and nodded. “Never have been but that one was just embarrassing because I messed up the song and they just left it in. They wouldn’t let me rerecord it.” Alastair gave him a sympathetic nod. “Those are the worst.” He added as he turned left.

Thomas smiled and rolled the window down, Alastair’s coming down shortly after. It was surprisingly warm but it felt good to feel the wind in his face. A few notes of a new song filtered through the speakers and Thomas’s head whipped around, his hand coming up to turn the volume up before he knew what was happening.

Alastair looked over with a smile and laughed at the overly excited puppy look Thomas was now giving off. Thomas threw his head back and started singing far too loudly as the words began.

When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be,

I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you

When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

When I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you

And when I haver, hey I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who's havering to you

And I would walk 500 miles

And I would walk 500 more

Just to be the man who walk a thousand miles

To fall down at your door

When I'm working, yes I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who's working hard for you

And when the money, comes in for the work I do

I'll pass almost every penny on to you

When I come home(When I come home), well I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who comes back home to you

And when I grow old, well I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who's growing old with you

But I would walk 500 miles

And I would walk 500 more

Just to be the man who walks a thousand miles

To fall down at your door

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

When I'm lonely, well I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who's lonely without you

And when I'm dreaming, well I know I'm gonna dream

I'm gonna Dream about the time when I'm with you

When I go out(When I go out), well I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who goes along with you

And when I come home(When I come home), yes I know I'm gonna be

I'm gonna be the man who comes back home with you

I'm gonna be the man who's coming home with you

And I would walk 500 miles

And I would walk 500 more

Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

To fall down at your door

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

Da da da (da da da)

Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da

And I would walk 500 miles

And I would walk 500 more

Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles

To fall down at your door

Thomas was out of breath by the time he finished and they were both laughing loudly. Alastair looked over at Thomas and Thomas couldn’t help the way his breath caught in his throat. Alastair looked beautiful with his carefree smile and his hair haloed by the sun. His smile was big and his eyes were crinkled from laughter.

Thomas had never seen a person as beautiful as Alastair and he didn’t quite know what to do with the butterflies that were currently attacking his stomach.

Alastair’s smile turned soft and he rested his hand on the console with his palm up. Thomas took his hand gently and laced their fingers together as they continued the drive with the wind blowing in both their faces.

Thomas realized at that moment, that no matter where they went if they went together it would be an adventure.

#high notes #high notes: chapter eleven #thomastair #thomas lightwood #alastair carstairs #band au

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everybodyscupoftea · 4 years

Text

fbgm (fuck bitches get money)

pike jj x reader (plus: cody and tyler)

five times you text cody and tyler plus one time they text you

this is the origin story of you meeting cody and tyler + getting to know them, all taking place over the span of freshman year

(warnings: cursing)

One

You and JJ had been in the library for over 12 hours and were running on coffee and protein bars. He was laying on his back, laptop on his chest, asleep, and you were on your stomach, flipping through your highlighted notes to find the exact quote you wanted to use in your paper.

His stomach growled loudly and jolted him awake with a groan. Shoving his laptop to the side, JJ stretched before saying, “We need actual food. I can call some friends to bring us some Jimmy John’s if you’re down.”

“Fuck, that sounds fantastic right now.”

“Sweet. I’ll add you to our group message and you can send your order.”

Your body went cold for a second, “Wait, what? Why can’t I just type in your phone.”

“I need to look at the menu, just send them yourself.”

Mouth gaping for a few seconds, you protested, “I don’t know your friends. Isn’t that weird?”

“Nah, they’re cool dudes,” he reassured just as texts starting pouring onto your screen.

Maybank who the fuck is this number

Oh is it the hot girl from your English class. Right on dude

Dumbass she can fucking see this.

JJ we can just add whoever we want whenever now

Shut the fuck up and be nice, you’re the reason we don’t have any girl friends

Speak for yourself dickhead

JJ gave you an apologetic smile and said, “Well, at least you can order your food now.”

You sighed and typed your order out, thumb hesitating over the send button. Looking over at him, you asked, “Can you send something first, I feel weird.”

He gave you a look, “Dude, just send it.” So you did.

When the boys showed up thirty minutes later with the food, you could’ve kissed one of them from how hungry you were. The taller one dropped down next to you and held his fist up, “Nice to meet you officially, I’m Cody.”

You bumped it and the other guy handed you the food, “I’m Tyler, your savior, because Cody managed to misread your order, but I made sure they got it right.”

“Nice to meet you guys, thanks for the food.”

You thought they’d leave, but they stayed, fucking around on their phones for a while until JJ got up to leave. They all bid you goodbye and Cody winked, “Text me anytime.”

Two

JJ was driving the two of you to a basketball game and he swore under his breath. You looked up from your phone as he dug through his wallet. After a few seconds, the light turned green, and he told you, “Hey, text Cody and Tyler and tell them to bring me my Student ID please.”

“You text them,” you said, not really wanting to. You’d had the message on mute because they sent a lot, and you never had anything to add, so you left it alone. You didn’t really want to open it and see what they’d been talking about.

He gave you an exasperated look at the next red light, “I’m driving, plus you have their numbers.”

“Yeah, but I don’t know them.”

“And whose fault is that? That’s why were all going to hang out at the game.”

You sighed and sent it, not happily by any means.

Can someone grab JJ’s ID out of his booksack

Sure thing, tell him he owes me a milkshake for having to climb the fucking stairs

His phone lit up and he nodded, “See, not so bad was it?”

JJ told you Tyler was a huge basketball fan (specifically the Sixers), and he had Opinions on your school’s team. He bounced over to you when they parked next to JJ, “I hear you’re a basketball girl.”

“Something like that,” you huffed out a laugh.

“Look, neither of those chumps respect it, and I need you to know that we will be doing March Madness brackets this year.”

“Brackets are fun,” you agreed, “can’t wait to wipe the floor with you.”

“Oh, you’re looking to get beat, huh?”

“I never lose,” you told him confidently.

He smirked, “We’ll see about that one. I don’t know who you’ve been playing, but you’ve got competition this year.”

The game was fun. Normally you’d have sat next to JJ, but Tyler let you sit on the end and sat on the other side. He talked your ear off about player stats and made jokes about the other players which had you laughing hard enough to get JJ’s attention. JJ leaned around Tyler to ask, “You good over there?”

“Better than Notre Dame, that’s for damn sure.”

“Oh shit!” Tyler said, giving you a fist bump. JJ winked at you and you felt a lot better after the game, finally feeling like you could get to know at least one of those guys.

The next basketball game you went to was with Tyler. He wanted to go see the Duke versus UNC game, and the two of you got there early waiting in line with your student ID’s to get a bracelet and get in. Tyler was wearing a t-shirt with “In Zion We Trust” written across the chest, and he was Hyped.

“Take a picture with me so I can put it on twitter. I need Zion to follow me before he gets drafted.”

You agreed with a laugh and he handed his phone to the person standing behind y’all to take the picture. It came out nice. He smiled at it, “Sweet. Now I’ve got the pretty girl trap to get that athlete follow. You’re a great wingman.”

“Thanks,” you deadpanned.

He smiled, “Feels good to have a basketball friend. We’re going to have to drive to Charlotte when the Sixers come to town.”

Three

You slumped over on your bed and JJ looked over at you, “What’s wrong now?”

“I’m fucked. This stupid fucking theatre class. I didn’t buy the book and now I need it and I don’t know anyone in that class and I can’t afford it all in one sitting.”

JJ furrowed his eyebrows, “Wait, Intro to Theatre?”

“Yeah, do you have the book?” you asked hopefully.

He shook his head, “No, sorry, but isn’t Cody in your class?”

“What?”

“Yeah, if it’s Tuesday and Thursday at 9:30 Cody is in that class.”

You searched your memory, trying to remember seeing him at any point in the semester. He could’ve definitely set at the top and you wouldn’t know because you always sat about halfway up, not wanting to climb all those stairs to the top of the auditorium.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him there.”

JJ snorted, “Okay well I never said he actually went to class. Text him though, because I’m sure he’d be down split textbook costs and just share the e-book.”

“Can you do it?”

“You’re an adult. Plus, you’ve sent stuff in the group, I thought you were okay now?”

“I was drunk!”

“Text the group if you aren’t comfortable enough to text Cody separately. Your grade is more important than your strange aversion to texting my friends.”

You rolled your eyes, but he was right.

Cody are you in theatre 161 on Tuesday and Thursday morning?

Yeah ugh pls don’t bring it up

Did you get the textbook?

Okay I guess we’re bringing it up…no I did not

We have questions from the end of chapter 5 due online, do you wanna just split the book for the rest of the semester? Rent it online or something?

Wait we have homework in that class

JJ laughed loudly where he was reading the conversation next to you and you sighed, trying to not throw your phone across the room. You looked at JJ, “Your friends are idiots.”

“Careful, bud, you sound a little fond.”

We have homework every week and a quiz every other week…

Oh fuck, you think it’s too late for me to come back from this?

I think there’s a bonus essay for 30 points which might help some?

Let’s split the book.

Venmo me.

You rented the book and sent him a link before settling down to do your own homework, and you felt better about reaching out if you needed homework help again.

It didn’t really come up between the two of you again until he texted you one Wednesday afternoon out of the blue asking what night you were going to see Arcadia for class. You had a ticket for the Friday night showing, and after about 30 minutes, he texted you again that he’d cancelled his plans and gotten one too.

The two of you met for dinner and walked to the theater near the caf together. He was talkative, “I did some research on this play and I actually read the chapter on how to take notes on plays, so I have my tiny notebook and I’m ready.”

“I saw Arcadia with my sister a while back, so I kind of know what’s going on, and I can help if you need,” you said, holding your own tiny notebook.

“For sure. Might should get together to write our papers, that’s going to be what fucks me. If you don’t mind meeting tomorrow at 11, I’ll bring coffee and we’ll knock it out.”

“Sounds great.”

You weren’t sure how good of a theatre buddy Cody was going to be, but you clearly underestimated him. He laughed at the right time, turned his phone off and not just on silent, and didn’t even get up once besides during intermission.

Cody walked you back to your dorm at midnight, when it finally ended, and before you could get inside called out, “Text me your coffee order for tomorrow, I’ll run by Dunkin.”

Four

JJ said he might be at his dorm when you got there, but when you texted him to come let you up, you got no answer. After pacing a few minutes outside, you decided it was too cold for that shit, so you bit the bullet and texted in the group.

I’m supposed to meet JJ, can anyone let me in the dorm?

It didn’t take long for someone to get back to you. Tyler responded after a few seconds.

Fuck dude, are you outside? I’m coming down.

You were practically shivering when he shoved the door open, and he pulled you inside. The RA sitting at the desk didn’t even look up when the two of you passed and he shook his head, “Man, where the fuck is Maybank?”

“Not sure, was going to ask you the same question.”

Tyler swiped to unlock the door and you saw Cody coming out of the toilet area. He brightened, “Yo, long time no see. What are you doing here?”

“Supposed to be hanging out with JJ tonight,” you muttered, checking your phone again.

Cody shrugged, “Come watch Great British Baking Show with me and Tyler. We have popcorn.”

It was warm and you liked GBBS, so you nodded and kicked your shoes off to follow them into their room. JJ didn’t get back for another hour, and by the time he got there, the three of you had ordered pizzas, started another episode, and were laying on Cody’s bed which was closest to the TV.

JJ stood in the doorway, “What’s going on guys?”

“Where have you been?” Tyler asked, tone accusatory.

“I-“ JJ was caught off guard, “got some dinner with friends.”

“Good thing we ordered pizza then,” you laughed, not too upset that he’d forgotten. JJ had the tendency to do shit like that.

“Fuck,” JJ sighed, “I’m so sorry.”

“All good. Glad your roommates are ten times more clutch than you.”

JJ rolled his eyes as the other boys preened and held their fists out for you to bump.

Five

Changing a flat tire isn’t that hard. Changing a flat tire and realizing halfway through that you don’t have a spare is hard. You could’ve fucking cried looking at the empty compartment that the spare usually sat, and you almost did, but last minute pulled your phone out to text the boys.

Anyone free for the next like 45 minutes to an hour to take me to get a spare tire

Before you could send anything else.

Jk we’ll come get you

So, you decided to sit on the curb and wait. Tyler’s truck pulled up and you hopped up, grabbing your wallet and keys. Cody hopped out the other side, put the tire in the tailgate, and climbed in the back, leaving the front open for you.

Tyler cranked up the music as soon as you shut the door and tore out of the parking lot before you could even buckle up. You thought Cody was being nice letting you get the passenger seat, but you later found out he just wanted to sit behind Tyler because, “The driver always protects his side first.”

You held on to the door as he whipped into the AutoZone parking lot and got out of the car as fast as possible as soon as he parked. Cody was laughing as you sagged against the car, head spinning, and he clapped a hand down on your shoulder, “Bet you wish you’d have just taken an uber.”

“I wish JJ had answered my text.”

Cody and Tyler followed you into the store to ask someone to repair your tire. Tyler leaned against the counter next to you and Cody scrolled through something on his phone while you talked to the guy who clearly wasn’t taking you very seriously.

You huffed, getting Tyler’s attention, and he looked up from his hands, “What’s up?”

Before you could say anything, the man cut in, “I don’t think she knows what she wants.”

Tyler furrowed his eyebrows and nudged Cody before responding, “What do you mean?”

“She just needs to get a new tire.”

“We brought the tire, just look at it because she thinks it can be repaired,” Tyler defended, crossing his arms.

Cody moved to stand on the other side of you, “Why can’t you just look at it?”

“If you buy a new tire, we’ll send someone back to your car with you to put it on.”

“I can put it on myself,” you responded indignantly.

Tyler squeezed your shoulder, “I can’t change a tire, but she can. Show some respect and just give her what she’s asking for, man.”

The worker rolled his eyes but did as Tyler said, and your heart swelled a little bit with fondness at these two guys who you didn’t know all that well standing up for you. Throwing your arms over their shoulders, you squeezed them closer, “My heroes.”

Cody shrugged, “Now we know who to call if we need a tire changed.”

Plus One

You slept in one Saturday, finally happy to be through with a busy week, and when you woke up had over 50 texts from Cody and Tyler asking to come to their dorm to help them make a cake for JJ’s birthday. Cody was the last to text, so you responded to him.

Give me like ten mins to get dressed and I’ll come to your dorm.

Oh thank fuck you’re alive!

I wasn’t dead, I’m just tired.

Wake up sweetheart, busy day today

The boys had a recipe and the ingredients all spread out when you got there and the three of you took control of the dorm building’s kitchen on the first floor. Tyler pulled up some music and sat on the counter, content to watch you and Cody do the work.

It went relatively smoothly. Cody almost fucked it up by grabbing the salt instead of the sugar, and the tablespoon instead of the teaspoon, but you got it in the oven without too much extra struggle. Tyler made grabby hands at one of the spoons and you rolled your eyes but handed it to him anyway.

“Thanks, you’re the best. Better than Maybank,” Tyler told you before licking the spoon.

“I know I’m the best, but thanks for reminding me.”

Cody made a noise, “Oh, we’ve been discussing group chat names and we’ve narrowed it down to a few. It’s your pick.”

“Lay ‘em on me,” you told them, moving to sit on the cabinet next to Tyler.

“Fuck bitches get money, AutoZone annihilators, and Greek gods.”

“Oh my god, Greek gods? Think much of yourself, do you?” you asked between laughs.

Tyler rolled his eyes, “You know we mean because Greek life.”

“I know, but still. I like fuck bitches get money.”

Cody cheered, “Fuck yeah, my choice!” and changed the name immediately.

The timer went off and Cody reached down to pull the cake out. Tyler gathered up all the utensils and ingredients and followed Cody out of the kitchen. He cheered, “Come on bitches, let’s go wake up the princess!”

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x you #frat!jj #pike!jj #outer banks #outer banks fic #jj maybank fic

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slapshot-to-the-heart · 4 years

Text

Breakable Heaven (pt. III) - p.l. dubois

Part I II

Here’s part III! One more part after this, then we’re going to be finishing up our time with Laurel and Pierre-Luc. It’s seriously been so so much fun writing this over the past few weeks, and I’m excited to get to keep the story going. Many many thanks to @hockeyboysiguess for being a great sounding board for Breakable Heaven so far, my favorite response of hers to anything I’ve sent has got to be “that’s rude.” So, enjoy! Reblog if you enjoy it, come scream into my inbox, and I still read every tag!

Part III

July 10 (sat)

Laurel was exhausted. Two hours after the wedding, her and her meager bridal party had shown up to her house, piling everything she hadn’t yet brought over to Pierre’s apartment into her SUV and Madeline’s white sedan. She left her old apartment with the keys at the front office and one last wistful look into the place that had once been her own. She’d miss it, she thought, as she and Pierre drove down the Ville-Marie Expressway towards his apartment, her fingers still trying to get used to the feeling of having rings on it. She’d only lived in the space for a year, but it was in that building that she started her dream job, that space that she adopted her dog, that apartment where she met one of her best friends and that place where she got married.

They had spent a few hours half-heartedly unpacking her boxes; Laurel was excited to get settled in, but she was also the world’s worst procrastinator and even at 6 PM, all that she had managed to get done was folding some clothes and adding her book collection to the shelves in the living room. Pierre poked his head into the spare room — her room? — rolling his eyes when he saw her “progress.” “I was going to order in, what do you feel like?”

Laurel hung up a blazer in the closet. “Pizza?” she asked hopefully. “Though I’m really going to have to teach you to cook one of these days. We can’t survive off of take-out and pasta alone.”

“If that’s how you want to be,” he responded good-naturedly. “I’ll have you know that I can cook more than pasta, though.”

“Really?” Laurel asked, raising her eyebrows. “What’s the Chef Dubois specialty?”

“I make a mean salmon,” he replied, before returning to the living room. That was another thing she had to get used to quickly as soon as they started going through the marriage process: Québec didn’t allow for women to take their husbands’ names at marriage. It wasn’t something she’d ever thought too deeply about, but Laurel supposed she’d always assumed that she’d take her husband’s name when she got married. But then again, she always assumed she’d get married under normal circumstances. Her parents aside, Cloquet wasn’t an absurdly conservative town, but it was still certainly something of an anomaly for a married woman to still have her maiden name. Which is what she was now. A married woman. Oh God.

Pizza with white wine may not have been the most conventional choice, but it got the job done, Laurel thought as she lay in bed at half past midnight, the birds outside her door insisting on making her efforts to fall asleep as futile as her efforts to ignore them. She’d already been in bed for an hour; after dinner, her and Pierre watched a few episodes of Black Mirror — also probably not the best choice to do before bed, but oh well — before he wished her a good night’s sleep. She had taken a melatonin and drank a cup of tea before bed, put on a playlist full of rain noises, but nothing seemed to be working. Maybe it was because it was the first night in a new place, or the birds outside, or just the craziness and excitement of the day catching up to her.

Laurel felt like a child again as she padded over to Pierre’s room, like she was five and back in Minnesota, crawling into her parents’ bed after hearing a wolf howl somewhere on the property. But really, she didn’t really care what she had to do if it meant she could get a good night’s rest. She knocked lightly on his door, careful not to wake up the dogs, who had long since fallen asleep in a corner of the living room. “Mmm?” he answered. She turned the doorknob. God, I hope I didn’t wake him up. She didn’t, as it would turn out; Pierre was propped up on his headboard, scrolling through his phone as he moved his eyes from his screen to her figure in the doorway. “You good? Everything okay?”

Laurel shrugged, wiggling her hand. “I don’t know what it is, I tried everything but I’m just not able to get to sleep. I’d try and wait it out, but my sleep cycle will be thrown off for a week if I’m not able to get to bed tonight.”

He moved over from the middle, reaching over to the side of his bed and getting another pillow before throwing back the covers and patting the spot next to him. “C’mere.”

“Are you sure?” Laurel said, furrowing her brow, suddenly very aware of the fact that she was wearing an old t-shirt and panties, leaving very little to the imagination.

He nodded, putting his phone down on the nightstand, smiling softly at her. “Of course. What’s mine is yours, eh?” That was all it took for Laurel to climb into the right side, claiming it as her own, and throw the duvet over her body. She fell asleep almost instantly.

---

Laurel woke up to the unmistakable smell of bacon frying and the other side of the bed devoid of Pierre’s sleeping form. She straightened the bed before walking out, where she was greeted by two plates on the breakfast bar, a pot of coffee brewing, and her husband at the stove.

“I thought you said you couldn’t cook?” Laurel teased, leaning up against the granite countertop.

“Good morning to you too.” Pierre shrugged. “I hardly think being able to fry an egg and not burn toast qualifies as cooking, but I’ll take what I can get.”

Laurel stepped further into the kitchen, lightly dragging her fingers over his back in a silent thank you as she opened the cupboard. “Let me get the coffee, at least,” she said, grabbing two mugs off the shelf and the creamer out of the fridge. “How do you take yours?” Laurel asked, glancing at Pierre from the side as he buttered the toast.

“A little bit of cream, more sugar,” he replied, sliding the plates onto the bar as she handed him his mug. “Perfect,” he said, smiling. A few minutes into breakfast, with Laurel just about to crunch into her second piece of toast, he spoke again. “So, I was thinking…”

She nodded. “I should hope so?”

Pierre laughed, ducking his head. “I was going to post something about the wedding today, online and stuff, but wanted to check with you first.” They had spoken about it once or twice before the wedding, both of them knew that it wasn’t practical nor honest to think that they’d be able to keep the news from everyone over the entire duration of their temporary marriage. And part of the “sell,” part of what she needed to prove, was that their relationship was real. And real would mean posting about each other online, real would mean flying down a few times a month — thank God her schedule gave her a long weekend, and thank God the flight wasn’t too long — for games and galas and real would mean meeting his friends and him meeting her family and Laurel had to stop thinking about it all before her head exploded.

“Go for it,” she said. “I don’t like having to hide from it any more than you do, so it’ll be a relief to let everyone know, give a heads-up to the four people on my Instagram page who actually care about my life.

Pierre poked her arm. “Five, now.” He opened his phone, scrolling through the pictures Madeline had sent from yesterday. She had run a small side business doing photography in university, and insisted on taking their photos as a wedding present. “You deserve something beautiful to look back on,” she had said. The final book wouldn’t be done for a few weeks, but she had sent over the raw shots the night before. “What about this one?” He leaned over to show her. Their foreheads were touching, his arms wrapped around her waist as they stood in the middle of one of Vieux Port’s cobblestone side streets. Laurel’s fingers brushed the back of his neck, her other hand loosely holding her bouquet. If you didn’t know, they looked like a real couple. They looked like they were in love.

“It’s gorgeous,” Laurel murmured softly. “I knew Madeline was talented, but wow. She outdid herself.”

Pierre nodded in agreement. “She did. I know I already told you, but you really did look incredible.” Laurel’s cheeks burned; she raised her mug to her lips, hopeful the oversized ceramic would cover enough of her face that he couldn’t see the effect his words had had on her. Laurel opened her own phone, scrolling through to find the matching photo. A few minutes later, he handed her his phone and she passed hers, giving their captions one last once-over before giving up their secret. Her eyes flitted across the screen.

Yesterday, I had the incredible fortune of marrying @laurel.klerken, the best person I’ve ever had the fortune of loving. I know it might come as a shock, and that we’ve kept our relationship under wraps since realizing after years of being friends that friendship just wasn’t enough any more, but this wasn’t a decision that either of us made lightly. Laurel, you’re an amazing woman, and even though it’s only been a day, an amazing wife. Whether it’s for your patients, your friends, or me, you make everyone around you feel warm, safe, and cared for beyond measure. You have a sharp wit and an even sharper mind, and I have endless admiration for how committed you are for standing up for what’s right, even when it’s not popular and even if it’s gotten you in trouble once or twice. Marriage is a partnership and a journey, and I’ve never been so excited to start a new adventure.

Laurel sniffed, not even noticing the tears pricking her eyes until Pierre handed her a tissue. “Thanks,” she murmured. “You don’t think you’re laying it on a little thick, though?”

The corner of his mouth twitched. “Not at all.” One tap later, and it was posted. Three minutes later, his phone rang as they were doing the breakfast dishes. Cap ❤️ flashed across the screen. Pierre grimaced. “It’s the captain. I should probably answer this one,” he said, pressing the speaker button as he dried his hands on a spare towel.

“You’re married,” Nick Foligno said, wasting no time. “Is this a fucking joke?” Laurel more than understood his apprehension, but the words still stung.

“Yes I am,” Pierre said slowly, “and no, it’s not a joke. Laurel and I are legally married in the province of Québec.”

She could hear a labored breath from the other line, followed by an airy laugh. “What the hell, man?”

Nick was ultimately happy for them, and after being introduced to Laurel after they switched the call over to FaceTime he apologized for his reaction, but Laurel waved him off. “You’re just looking out for your boy is all. I’d do the same.”

Nick nodded. “Take care of him for us, Laurel. Your address still the same?” He looked over towards Pierre, who hummed his assent. “Janelle and I will send you something. Something useful.”

---

July 28 (wed)

“Something useful” turned out to be a gorgeous set of Wüsthof knives and a stand mixer, the latter of which Laurel was nearly jumping out of her socks with excitement to try. Baking had long since been one of her favorite hobbies and her go-to method of stress relief; while she was grateful for the arm muscles her years of having to hand mix everything had given her, she wasn’t going to miss the extra effort. So Laurel Klerken was taking full advantage of her new toy. She had gone down to the Jean-Talon market in the morning, which was quickly becoming one of her favorite weekly activities. Especially with Pierre around to help her, she was learning to shift her speaking into the Québecois dialect, and her French was good enough to order from the vendors in their language and be understood. In her book, that was a win. The peak of summer meant it was berry season in Montréal, which meant it was time for Laurel to break out her nana’s blueberry oatmeal muffin recipe. And chocolate chip walnut cookies. And a French apple tart. Okay, so maybe she went a little bit overboard, but they had their desserts for the week and it made the kitchen smell so good.

Pierre opened the door just as Laurel was pulling out the last pan of cookies, walking around the corner into the kitchen and raising his eyebrows at the view. She looked over at him. “You going to complain about your wife’s baking when you’re the primary beneficiary?” she asked, challenging him with a playful smile on his face.

Pierre held his hands up in surrender, holding the mail between two fingers. “No.” He picked one of the cookies off of the cooling rack, taking a bite. “Definitely not.”

Laurel nodded towards the mail, walking over to the sink to wash her hands. “What came in the mail?”

“Nothing much,” he said, shrugging. “Just a little letter from IRCC.”

Her eyes lit up. “Immigration finally got back? Did they send my card?”

Pierre nodded, handing her the envelope. It barely took five seconds for her to rip it open. “You, Laurel Elizabeth Klerken, are now officially a permanent resident of Canada. Congrats, babe.”

Laurel squeaked in excitement, dancing around in the kitchen , the holographic detailing on the card catching the glow of the late-afternoon light. She threw her arms around Pierre, giving him a kiss on the cheek that was just barely off to the side of his lips. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she said breathlessly.

“Don’t mention it.”

She pulled back, still smiling. “No, ‘don’t mention it’ is for when you bring home dinner without being asked, or take a drunk friend home from the bar. Not for things like this,” she said, wiggling her card. “This is everything to me, P. I get to stay in the city that I love, I get to stay at the job that I love. I get to —” She looked down, eyes widening. “I can finally get a health card!”

Pierre let out a laugh. “Out of everything, you’re most excited about that?” Being a dual citizen who lived in the U.S. for the better part of the year, Pierre understood the absolute chasm of accessibility that separated the American and Canadian health insurance systems better than most, but he still looked at his wife’s choice with incredulity.

“Of course it is,” Laurel said, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. She still had insurance purchased through her work, but the fact that now it was so much easier and official and came out of her taxes instead of having to try and navigate the bureaucratic system of forms and checks and private insurance companies made it so much easier. “It’s just nice to finally be a part of a system that acknowledges healthcare as the human right it is. That’s another thing about how it works in the U.S., it’s tied to employment a lot of the time so it’s not always a guarantee.”

She gave a tense smile, leaning back against the counter. “I might seem a little worked up about it, but that’s because I am. Uh,” she paused, eyes flickering up towards the chrome-plated track lighting, “my dad lost his job when I was a kid. He was a foreman at a construction company, but then the recession hit in ‘08 and he was laid off. We lost our insurance. Maggie and I were able to get on MinnesotaCare, which is the state insurance for low-income families, but our parents didn’t get approved. Not enough money to go around, I guess,” she scoffed. “Unemployment wasn’t paying enough and mom’s job isn’t full-time, so she doesn’t get benefits. Apparently they think healthcare is a benefit.” Laurel took another pause. “And then Dad had a stroke. It wasn’t serious, thank God, but the bills...Maggie was almost graduating high school and headed off to college, and money was tight even before the layoffs. We were able to come up with the money, but only because the community really came together, in a way I had never seen before. I still haven’t seen anything like it since. Bake sales, church fundraisers, garage sales.” The tiniest of smiles played on Laurel’s lips as she looked back up at her husband. “Do you know how much pasta Minnesotans can eat at a spaghetti dinner?”

“A lot?”

“A whole hell of a lot,” Laurel confirmed. “But anyways. That’s when it became personal to me, and I think it’s why healthcare and access to quality care is still something that I’m still so passionate about and invested in. It’s why I became a nurse.”

Pierre walked over to her carefully, rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb. “It makes absolute sense, Laurel. I know that probably wasn’t easy for you, so thank you for sharing. It means a lot to me that you’re willing to let me in like that.” Laurel wasn’t a cold person by any means; she was one of the kindest and most giving people Pierre had ever met, even in the few months that they’d known each other. But she was someone that could be guarded at times — for very good reason — and it meant the world to him that she was willing to let him chip away her hardened exterior little by little to see the brilliance that lay within.

She pressed against his side, her head resting on his arm. “You’re my husband. Why wouldn’t I?”

---

Laurel was in the ensuite of her and Pierre’s room, washing her face before going to bed, when she heard her phone vibrate with a text. After that first night, Laurel had made it a habit of sharing a bed; she’d never slept better in her life than the past two and a half weeks, and even though she may have been loath to admit it, waking up to an incredibly attractive man — who was shirtless half of the time — wasn’t something she was about to complain about. “Can you get that for me?” She was expecting a text from her mom, something about confirming her and her dad’s flight times for their visit next week.

“Laurel?” Pierre called cautiously.

She turned towards him, patting her face dry. “What? Did their gate get changed or something?”

He shook his head, walking towards her and holding the phone out like it was a bomb. “It’s Maggie.”

Laurel’s mouth immediately went dry. “M-Maggie?” She took the phone, staring at the screen, open to the text.

“Do you want to talk to her? You don’t have to if you’re not feeling up to it,” Pierre said, searching her face for any semblance of apprehension. As far as he knew, she hadn’t talked to her sister in years, and he didn’t know why that was suddenly about to change.

She shook her head. “No, it’s fine. I just...I have no idea what she wants. Why, after three years, is she finally deciding that she wants to be a part of my life again?” She looked down at her phone.

So, I had to hear it through the Cloquet grapevine that you got married?? What’s that about, L? Maggie wrote. Laurel pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing. The gossip train in her hometown was second to none; to be honest, she was a little bit surprised it even took her older sister this long to hear about it. She was already enough of an anomaly. Less than a quarter of her city had a college degree, even fewer left the state to do it, so her going to Toronto for university was practically unfathomable — even if it was closer than Texas, where her second-choice school was. So, needless to say, she was a frequent headline in the Cloquet rumor mill. She had heard it all. That she had run off to Canada to escape a high school sweetheart turned sour, that she had cut off all ties with her family, that she had shaved half of her head and dyed her eyebrows bright pink. The last one actually had some truth to it, but it was just the eyebrows and she was a drunk 20-year-old, and at least she didn’t get a tattoo of the Maple Leafs logo on her thigh like her friend Ethan.

But this one wasn’t a rumor, and if nothing else, Maggie deserved to know that much. Not much to say. It’s true, if that’s what you were wondering.

Why didn’t you tell me? Why did I have to find out third-hand?

Laurel rolled her eyes, sitting down with a huff on the edge of their bed. Not to be harsh, Maggie, but it’s not like you’ve wanted to be that invested in my life since you left home. How was I supposed to know if this was even your number any more? I don’t even know what country you’re in right now.

Her response was almost immediate. I’m working at a hostel in Tokyo. But seriously? I know we haven’t been super close the past few years, but I’m still your sister, and I would have thought you’d tell me about something like this. Getting married is big. You don’t think you’re still a little young? Have you even finished school yet?

I graduated last year, I’ve been working at a hospital in Montréal for over a year, Maggie. And I know it’s a little early, but Pierre-Luc and I are happy. I love him, and he’s a good man and respects the hell out of me. I don’t really need anything else.

It was a few minutes before her next text came through, this time in all caps. YOU MARRIED A FUCKING NHLER? Laurel grew up knowing hockey, obviously; you couldn’t really live in Minnesota and not, and she wasn’t even a half-bad skater herself, but Maggie had always been the more dedicated of the sisters. She’d been the one who was always begging their dad to make the two-hour drive to St. Paul for a Wild game. Even when money was tight, Doug always found a way to scrape up enough for the tickets as her birthday present in January.

Denise from church didn’t tell you?

All she said was that it was some hot French-Canadian guy, and mom said you moved to Quebec, so I thought it could be any number. Fair enough.

Denise seriously called him hot?

Laurel could imagine her sister rolling her eyes all the way in Japan. Okay, fine, she didn’t say hot. But like...am I wrong?

For the first time in a long time, her sister made her laugh. Yeah, okay. He’s hot. I’m very aware that my husband is a class-A babe.

“You think I’m hot?” Pierre said, peeking over her shoulder and wiggling his eyebrows.

Laurel’s cheeks heated. “Yes, okay. I think you’re very attractive. Happy?”

“Very,” he responded. “I’m glad my wife thinks I’m hot. The feeling’s mutual,” he said before walking into the bathroom to brush his teeth, leaving her even more flustered than before. She turned back to her conversation with Maggie. My shift is about to start, so I’ve got to go. But I’m happy for you, L. I really am. You’ve done exactly what you want with your life, and I couldn’t be more proud.

Laurel’s finger traced the words on the screen, a small smile on her face as Pierre came back into the room, throwing back the sheets. She plugged her phone into its charger, turning it face-down onto the nightstand. Things weren’t perfect between her and Maggie; far from it. One conversation over text wasn’t going to change that. But maybe, just maybe, there was still something there that was worth saving. After flicking off the lights, the last thing she remembered before falling asleep was the feeling of Pierre snaking his arm around her waist, pulling her to rest her back up against his chest. And Laurel let him.

August 17 (tues

It had been one of the worst days of Laurel’s life, and she wasn’t one for dramatics. Certainly the worst shift of her career. She knew when she chose to work in a pediatric intensive care unit, that it wasn’t going to be all sunshine and rainbows. If she wanted sunshine and rainbows, she would have gone with something less taxing. Something like dermatology, or working in a pediatrician’s office, or being a school nurse. God knows she could hand out ice packs and tampons. But no, she had to pick critical care, and critical care with children, one of the most emotionally and mentally taxing areas in the entire healthcare field. She saw the highest highs, the incredible moments when a three-year-old girl with a brain hemorrhage was able to get home, or a twelve-year-old boy finally got a kidney transplant after having been waiting for years. She saw the highest highs, but on days like today, she also saw the lowest lows.

Laurel carried her scrub top in one hand, her backpack slung over one shoulder, and tried desperately to regulate her breathing as she turned her key in the lock, pushing the door open. No matter how many times she had helped her patients breathe, she never seemed to be able to take her own advice.

Pierre stood in the kitchen, making a smoothie, but immediately turned off the blender when he saw her face. “What happened?” he asked, gently taking her bag from her and placing it on the floor.

Laurel collapsed into his arms almost instantly. “T-there was a little girl who c-came in yesterday from a car crash, and it was pretty b-bad, but she made it through the night and everyone thought she’d b-be fine,” she hiccuped, “but then right at the end of m-my shift she started coughing up b-blood and she was crashing, so I tried to do CPR until the t-team got there, but it didn’t work and we…” Laurel trailed off, sobbing, gripping the back of Pierre’s shirt like a lifeline. “We lost her, P. And the doctor on call was tied up with another patient, so I had to notify the family, and God, it was the worst thing I’ve ever had to do. She was only seven.” She looked down at her scrub top. “I have to go throw this in the washing machine before the stain sets.”

Pierre pulled back slightly, gently taking the navy shirt from her, giving a kiss on her forehead. “I’ll do it. You need to rest. Take a shower, or a bath, get into some comfortable clothes. I’ll take care of dinner.”

It was almost forty-five minutes later when Laurel finally emerged from the bathroom, clad in high school sweats and a faded Blue Jackets t-shirt. “I hope you didn’t mind that I took this one,” she said, picking at a loose thread on the bottom hem, “I hadn’t gotten to laundry yet this week.”

“It’s fine, Laur,” Pierre said, plating chicken stir-fry and rice. Cooking together had become one of their things; Pierre certainly wasn’t as hopeless as some people she had met, and he was right that he made an excellent salmon. But they couldn’t eat fish every day of the week, so Laurel broke out one of her few cookbooks and they had been making their way through the recipes together. They had finished breakfast and were making their way through poultry. Hence, chicken stir-fry. “You look better in it anyways.”

They ate in silence, her half-heartedly picking up forkfuls of rice only to put them down again. She smiled weakly at Pierre. “The food’s good, I swear. I just don’t have much of an appetite tonight.”

“I get that,” he said. “How about I put this in away in the fridge and you can get a yogurt or something? You don’t have to have a full meal, but you should eat something. We can watch something after, or you can go to bed if you’re not feeling up to it. Your call.”

“TV sounds nice, do you still have the old Parks & Rec recorded?” Laurel needed something she didn’t need to pay attention to, something that could just be background noise as she tried to sift through the emotions of her day and try to make sense of it all.

He nodded. “Wouldn’t get rid of it before asking, I know how much you love it.”

They were curled up on the couch together a few minutes later, a striped blanket thrown over Laurel’s lap despite the weather outside still lingering in the mid 70s. It wasn’t for warmth, not really; it was for comfort. Pierre’s arm was slung over her back, his thumb absentmindedly moving across her upper arm. She leaned into his touch, hardly paying attention to the show. “Do you want to talk about it?” Pierre murmured, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “You don’t have to, but it might help.” He wasn’t an expert by any means, but Pierre obviously knew that people died in hospitals, in intensive care units even more so. Which meant that there was an almost surefire chance that she had had people die on her watch, die on her shift. Had children die on her watch. And that didn’t mean she was a bad nurse or a bad person, but just that sometimes there were illnesses and injuries so severe that even the best medical care in the province couldn’t save them. So why was this one impacting her so intensely? Had she reacted this way before, with Madeline or her coworkers, and he just hadn’t seen it before? Or was there something different about this case, about that girl that made it hit closer to home for some reason?

Laurel took a shaky breath. “I know you’re right, that it’s not healthy to keep it all bottled up inside. But that’s what I’m used to, you know? I love my job, I do, but you have to compartmentalize sometimes. With this one, it’s just…” She searched for the right words. “It was so immediate, so in front of me, that I didn’t have any time to reach beyond trying to save her life. I didn’t think, I just went based on instinct and training. And she still died.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Laurel,” Pierre said firmly. “You did everything you could, you did everything right.”

“I know that,” she sniffed, “but it’s so hard to believe sometimes. That if I had gotten there a few seconds sooner, or if the crash team had been a little earlier, she might have survived. And I wouldn’t have had to tell a mother and father that their daughter was dead.” Pierre felt terrible, like there was nothing he could do, because there was nothing he could do, not apart from sit and listen. “I think it was different this time because I finally saw myself in their shoes, I obviously don’t have kids, not yet, but I imagined what it was like to have to be on the receiving end of that news, and it tore me apart, P.” Her voice cracked, and his heart broke. “Being the mom to a beautiful child and then all of the sudden having them all of the sudden stripped away? No longer living? I know that life’s not fair, but fuck, I thought I thought it would be a little better than this.”

Her voice went silent, and Pierre took the opportunity to speak. “It’s not fair, and I think part of what makes you so good at what you do is the fact that you recognize that. You’re so dedicated to giving everyone that comes through those doors the best care, because you genuinely believe that they deserve it. And that’s incredible. You don’t get complacent, you’re never satisfied with just doing things adequately and just enough to get by. You give everything 110%, and that’s how I know the kind of incredible person you are.” He paused. “And I think every parent worries about their kid getting sick, or getting hurt. I know mine did, and I’d be willing to bet yours were the same way. Worrying means you care. And you care the most deeply, the most genuinely, out of anyone I’ve ever met. And I know, when the time comes, that you’ll make an amazing mother. Whoever gets to do that with you will be a lucky man.”

“You really think so?”

Pierre slipped his hand into hers. “Positive.”

September 10 (fri)

Laurel’s fingers tapped nervously on the counter as she waited for Pierre to bring the last of his bags from the bedroom. He didn’t usually schlep a ton of things back-and-forth from Montréal to Columbus every time he needed to travel, but his ticket came with two free checked bags and if there was one thing Pierre-Luc Dubois was, it was efficient. It was the middle of September, and that meant training camps. That meant leaving Québec. That meant Ohio. That meant not seeing Pierre for weeks at a time, when the longest they had been apart since July was a two-day trip to Québec City Laurel took with her parents when they visited in August. Over the past two months, they had settled into a routine, and that routine was about to be broken. Grocery shopping, him washing the dishes while she dried, falling asleep together and waking up with legs tangled in the middle of the bed. She knew that he liked his coffee with a little bit of cream and more sugar, that Georgia got fussy if she wasn’t let out in the morning but Paul was more of a night owl, that dessert wasn’t supposed to be on his meal plan every day but that she could always get him to break for a slice of peach pie. He knew that she needed two Advil on the first day of her period because one just wouldn’t cut it, that her favorite Disney princess was Jasmine because of her independence, and that she liked to light lavender candles when she was stressed.

Pierre wheeled a bag out of the doorway. “That the last one?” Laurel asked, passing Phil’s leash to him as she held Georgia’s. He nodded. She spun her keys around on her finger. “Got both of your passports?”

Pierre patted his jacket pocket. “Right here.” It was easier for him; he could skip the wait in both countries. Exit Canada with the Canadian, enter the U.S. with the American.

It was 2 and his flight wasn’t until 4:15, but Laurel didn’t trust the traffic and she didn’t trust the wait times at the airport. “Guess we should get going then.”

“Guess we should.” Laurel grabbed one bag and he got the other, slinging his backpack over his shoulder and wheeling it out the door. It only took twenty minutes to get to the airport. Laurel pulled up next to the curb, double-checking the signs to make sure she wasn’t about to get fined for stopping, and put the car into park. Pierre was the first to open his door, grabbing both the dogs; Laurel followed suit a moment later.

“You’ve got to pop the trunk, babe,” Pierre murmured. He smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Oh, right,” she said, pressing the button on her key. It popped open with a telltale click; Pierre hefted out the black bag, she got the silver one. “Do you know how many people are going to have this exact bag? It’s going to be a nightmare at baggage claim, P” Laurel tried to joke. She always coped with humor.

Pierre laughed, this time a real one. “Fair enough. Guess I’ve got a lot riding on my luggage tags,” he said, flicking one of the offending objects around the handle of the bag, the black one. Laurel handed him the other handle, their fingers brushing as he gripped the metal. He put a finger under her chin, tilting her head to look up at him. He could see the apprehension in her eyes. There were a lot of things that Laurel Klerken did well, really well, but lying was never one of them. She was always an open book. “Hey, don’t look so down, Laur,” he said softly. “I know you’ll be missing your personal space heater and Piper will miss her siblings, but you’re coming to visit in two weeks and it’s going to be amazing. I’ll introduce you to the boys and the other wives, you’ll get to catch one of the preseason games, finally see my place in Columbus. It might be weird being alone for a while, but —” He cut himself off. “Scratch that, it will be weird for a while, for both of us, but we’ll get through it. You’re a great person, and not a terrible wife either. People have done long-distance relationships that were longer distances for more time, and they made it through just fine. You’ll be okay, Laur. We’ll be okay.”

Laurel took an unsteady breath, trying her best to put on a brave face. “Not a terrible wife, huh? Well, you’re not half a bad husband either.” As she spoke, she was thinking over his words. How normal they sounded, but how abnormal that was for them. They weren’t a normal couple, all they really were were friends who got married — right? So why was he saying those things, things that made him seem like a real husband talking to his real wife, things that were making her feel that maybe, just maybe, this marriage wasn’t as much of a hoax as the thought it was? And it was only because of that, only because she was either reading way too much into a situation that wasn’t even there or was the premier of reading people’s body language and being able to parse out their unsaid words, that she did what she did next. She threw her arms around her husband, and she kissed him.

#hockey imagine #hockey writing #pierre-luc dubois #hockey #hockey smut #hockey imagines #nhl imagine #nhl writing #nhl smut #nhl #nhl imagines #pierre luc dubois

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lokis-little-kitten · 3 years

Text

Teaching Assistant 11

He smiles at you and you then focus on class again since Loki is going over an important part of the book.

When the class is over you and Dimitri leave right away instead of that you wait to go to Loki’s office. You feel a pang of sadness but the thought of staying with him tonight cheers you up. You also know you have to keep socializing. You can’t just be around Loki the whole time.

After you impress the boys with your motorbike you leave to a pizza place where they desperately wanted to go to. There was some heavy rain last night and so the football field drowned.

When you sit down Dimitri and Steve sit down next to you. The other boys shove some tables together ready have a good time. ‘’Who’s going to treat the lady this time,’’ Robert asks as he sits down in front of you. Every damn time you went out with them they paid for you. In the beginning, you tried to fight it but you have given up now.

‘’I think it should be Steve,’’ Adam calls out with a large grin, ‘’he is the newbie after all!’’ Steve chuckles a bit and looks at you. ‘’Is this a thing?’’ You smile and him and nod awkwardly. ‘’Yes, one of them always pays out of ‘British Courtesy’,’’ you explain to him, ‘’if you don’t want you, you aren’t obligated to.’’ He smiles at you.

‘’Well, I’m in Britain now so I don’t think I have a choice. Eat me broke,’’ he cheers and starts to get up with some other boys. They usually order in little groups just like now. So Steve walks up together with Adam, Robert and Tom.

‘’So, how did the whole pay for the lady things come to be,’’ he asks Tom, a long chap. ‘’Well, we tell her it’s British courtesy but ehm… That’s a lie. Something is going on with her-’’ ‘’Anorexia, I know. She told me this afternoon.’’ Tom nods a bit and takes a step as the line moves along.

‘’So when she just came out of the hospital she refused to eat with anyone present. If someone pays for her she feels guilty enough to at least eat quite something.’’ Steve nods a bit and glances over at her. ‘’I see.’’

‘’We might not see each other every day or text for hours but… she is part of the team and we love her. Therefore, we take care of her. And you’re a part of that now,’’ Robert explains further. ‘’I’m honoured.’’

A few minutes later Steve and the boys sit back down and another group of five leaves. Steve puts down your pizza and gives you a kind smile. You quickly snap a picture of the pizza and send it to Daddy.

You get a text back from him almost immediately.

Daddy Good girl. Send me a picture of you eating as well, dear. I’m proud of you.

You smile brightly and send him a text back. ‘’Ooooh, someone is happy,’’ Tony gleams. You just stick out your tongue and lock your phone again. ‘’None of your business!’’ He laughs and takes a bite from his pizza. “Sure,” he winks at you.

‘’Boys, what about a selfie,’’ you ask while getting your camera out. ‘’Yes,’’ Dimitri cheers. The boys make a pose while you turn around and snap a picture with your pizza. ‘’Thanks.’’ You curl up on the bench and send the picture to Loki.

Daddy

Good girl. Good to see you have fun with your friends but they better keep their hands off.

You smile and send him a text back before focussing in your friends again. Funny stories are shared just like laughter. After an hour or so Steve nudges your elbow with his. He gives you a slight sign towards your food with his head. You notice you had stopped eating after one or two pieces. You smile as a thank you and start eating again.

After half an hour more you all leave to go home, or in your case Loki’s home. You first stop by to get some of your things you’ll need and then leave for his home again. When you arrive you park your bike and get up to the penthouse. You first knock to see if he is home or not but you don’t get anything back so you guess not.

So you get the key he gave you and unlock the door. You walk in immediately get attacked with kisses from Guardian. ‘’Hello, love,’’ you smile and hug the dog back. When it calms down it goes to lay down on his pillow.

‘’Now what,’’ you mumble to yourself. He did tell you to or go take a nap or go watch telly. But what if you touch something you’re not supposed to… or break it! You end up getting stuck in anxiety and wait in the middle of the living room.

When Loki finally comes back after another hour you look up and smile happily at him. ‘’Hello darling,’’ he smiles and speeds towards you throwing his briefcase in a corner. He hugs you close and kisses you sweetly. The moment you pull back you yawn loudly. Loki chuckles and kisses your forehead.

‘’Did you take a nap,’’ he asks still smiling widely at the thought of your little body in his bed hopefully dreaming of him. ‘’No, Daddy,’’ you say truthfully. ‘’No,’’ he frowns, ‘’did you watch telly then?’’ You shake your head again and yawn once more. You now regret not taking that nap.

Loki now seriously seems worried and cups your face. ‘’Why didn’t you do as you were told?’’ ‘’I was scared I would do something wrong, Daddy. I’m sorry!’’ You snuggle up with him and look up at him with large doe eyes.

‘’Darling, you are always allowed to come here to take a nap or watch telly. I don’t care if I’m home or not. Keep the key and then whenever you need to go somewhere to take a nap or have a drink and you close here you are always welcome.’’ He smiles at you and kisses your nose.

‘’Okay, Daddy.’’ He then suddenly picks you up and he carries you away. He walks you to the bedroom and puts you down on the bed. He goes to grab a shirt and walks back to you. He changes your clothes and forces you back into the bed.

‘’Go take a nap and I’ll go make dinner. Okay, little one?’’ You shake your head heavily. ‘’I wanna help you cook!’’ ‘’No. Little girls need some extra sleep. I’ll pick you up again when dinner is ready.’’ You pout but then lay your head down on the perfectly soft pillow. ‘’Okay… Don’t eat without me again,’’ you warn him grabbing his hand.

He sits down next to you and frowns. ‘’Is that why you want to help me cook? Are you scared Daddy will eat without you again?’’ You nod while your cheeks start to burn a little. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ Loki pulls you up from under the blankets onto his lap.

‘’No need to say sorry. Little one, I know you have a really hard time with eating and if me eating before you scares you, Daddy understands. I’ll do my very best not to eat without you again, okay?’’ ‘’Thank you, Daddy.’’ ‘’Good girl,’’ he smiles and kisses your cheek. ‘’Think you can go to sleep now?’’ ‘’Yes, Daddy,’’ you yawn and crawl back into bed all by yourself.

Loki tucks you in again and then leaves you be. He goes back to the kitchen and starts cooking dinner. It is finished but he still needs to put it on the plates and make the table when suddenly Guardian starts to bark at him rather alarmed.

‘’Crap,’’ he mumbles to himself and rushes to the bedroom. He shakes you awake and starts calling your name trying not to sound alarmed. ‘’Babygirl, wake up darling. Come on Daddy is hungry and it’s dinner time!’’

You yawn as you open your eyes. ‘’Hello Daddy,’’ you yawn and smile sweetly at him. ‘’Hello lovey, time to get up.’’ Loki grabs you under your arms and lifts you from the bed. ‘’Come on, little one. Dinner time.’’ He grabs your hand and drags you along to the kitchen.

You rub your eye and stumble along. ‘’Daddy, I’m tired,’’ you sulk at him. ‘’Well, you have been napping for half an hour and now it’s dinner time.’’ You groan again and climb on a stool at the least packed plate. Loki sits down as well and attacks his foot as if it could disappear at any moment.

You eat a lot slower for obvious reasons. Loki eating as much and as quick as he does is kind of comforting for some strange reason. When Loki has enough he puts his plate in the dishwasher and sits with you while making jokes to help you relax a little. Not long before you finish eating the doorbell rings all of the sudden.

You frown and look at Loki. ‘’Are you expecting,’’ you ask him nervously. ‘’No, go hide in my bedroom, love,’’ Loki tells you. Quickly you get up and run to his bedroom with Guardian on your heels.

As Loki told you, you hide in his bedroom under the blankets of his bed. Guardian stays with you thinking that it’s some game you’re playing.

Meanwhile, Loki walks to the door to look through the peephole. He smiles when he sees four guys knocking and waiting. ‘’Mate, we know you’re there open the damn door,’’ Evan yells at Loki while a grin.

Loki does and let’s the four lads in. ‘’Well, what a surprise,’’ Loki chuckles and walks towards the frich to get some beers. ‘’Well, we haven’t seen ya in a few weeks now. It was time to have a fucking beer again,’’ Luke smiles grabbing a bottle from Loki.

‘’No cussing,’’ Loki calls at them also getting a few bags of crisps. ‘’Why not,’’ Luke asks again. Loki just gives him a smirk and sits down with his own beer. ‘’But, lads, I was planning on inviting you over this weekend. I need to get all of the DDLG stuff in the playroom instead of what we have now.’’ The guys from a bit at this request.

‘’Looking for a little are you,’’ James asks grabbing a bottle of his own. ‘’Something like that.’’ Loki gets up to go and get you with a knowing smirk leaving his friends in confusion. He walks to the bedroom and chuckles when he sees the bulge in the blankets.

‘’Babygirl, it’s safe you can come out.’’ He smiles when you come out from under the covers with a slight hesitation. ‘’Are they gone,’’ you whisper carefully not to give away your presence. Loki just picks you up and puts you on his hip.

‘’Daddy, what’s going on?’’ ‘’My mates are over, babe.’’ Loki has you put on a bra and jeans before picking you up. He carries you into the living room while all the guys turn to see who is talking to. They gasp and quickly walk towards you. ‘’You already have one,’’ James asks with large eyes. ‘’Yeah, by accident. I thought she was a slave but turns out she is a little. Aren’t you?’’ ‘’Yes Daddy.’’

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