#maybe this is something that only people with social anxiety or similar can understand so its important to point it out
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[Major Omori spoilers]
A common criticism of Omori is that the plan Basil came up with is too "edgy" or just unbelievable, but I feel like the people who think that are looking at this scene with the wrong glasses.
Yes, when you look at it from a third-person perspective, after learning how Mari's suicide deeply affected everyone and, I assume, as an adult (I highly doubt kids are playing this game), the plan seems very irrational and stupid. And indeed it is. Because that's the kind of plan a kid would come up with if put in such an extreme situation.
Let me use an example that will be understandable for most people, I hope. Imagine you're cooking something in the kitchen, something that requires really hot oil, like fried potatoes. Suddenly, a fire breaks out. If this is the first time this happens, and you're prone to getting anxiety, your first thought is going to be pouring water on the fire. Anyone familiar with kitchen hazards knows that pouring water on a grease fire will make the fire spread and become worse. But you need two important things to be able to act accordingly in this situation: one is the knowledge of what your actions will lead to (in this case the fire becoming worse if you pour water onto it), and two, the ability to calm down so you can make the best decision.
Sunny and Basil had none of those when Mari died. They panicked and, unable to look at the situation with a clear mind, they made everything worse.
And this is not your average 'oh I got a little nervous and made a mistake' scenario. This is a scenario where you, unwillingly and completely on accident, killed someone. Someone that you, and many people around you, deeply loved. As the player, you're observing the situation from a place where you can judge their actions objectively, without any emotions that would tamper with your decisions.
But when you're in the middle of that kind of situation you don't have time to think about it. You're overwhelmed with very strong and negative feelings. Sunny completely shuts himself down, and possibly forces his mind to forget what just happened, the same way he forgets about the closet or Basil's room after he kills himself. Basil, on the other hand, denies that Sunny had pushed his sister down the stairs, and blames "something behind him'", leading him to believe that if someone discovers Mari's dead body, they'll "unjustly" put the blame on Sunny, so he opts for what he thinks is the best solution - lie about her death.
Maybe Basil thought of some other way they could lie to get away with her death, or maybe suicide was the only possibility on his mind at that time. Whatever is the case, we know the decision they took. Or rather the decision Basil took, since it's entirely plausible that Sunny had completely closed himself off and was just following Basil's instructions.
When you see it from the comfort of your chair, all their actions seem really bad, if not terrible, given how Mari's supposed suicide makes the group's friendship crumble. But that is a very unfair treatment of the situation and of their feelings. You’re asking two kids, who are already very shy and anxious, to deal with one kind of situation that I don’t even think an adult could handle well. If what they did seems unrealistic to you, you haven’t fully grasped how traumatic and stressful it must have been for them, and for any other person.
When I first learned the truth, I couldn’t stop asking myself: "what would have I done if this had happened to me?" But that's a question I am not allowed to answer, as I've never had something so tragic happen to me. And that's where the true horror of the game lies, in the fact that this could happen to anyone. Maybe not to such an extreme degree, but making one mistake, hurting someone you love in consequence, and feeling guilty about it is a very real thing to go through, one that I'm sure many have already experienced.
Sunny and Basil were just kids, they made the wrong decision and were forced to live with the unimaginable pain and guilt of their actions. To call their behavior irrational is to deny how humanly they acted in that situation. And after all, to err is human, and what they did was just a terrible mistake.
#omori#m#couldn't fit this anywhere but i also want to add that. as someone who gets very nervous when they make a mistake#and often tries to cover their mistakes up in fear that people will react negatively if they find out the truth#what sunny and basil did hits very close to home#maybe this is something that only people with social anxiety or similar can understand so its important to point it out#so people who are more confident/are good at taking decisions in stressful situations understand that for us anxious folks it's v different#i mean im the kind of person who would definitely panic and pour water if a grease fire broke out so....#anyway this is super long sorry im just having many thoughts about this game
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Omg the reblog person is so real for that. I understand that Tumblr doesn't have an algorithm so liking doesn't functionally do anything but I get extremely anxious about reblogging so the guilt trips are really awful for me (and I assume it's the same for others with similar issues.)
Uh- bit of a tangent/rant below. For context I'm an "Audhd-er" (I think that's the term people use, it means I'm autistic and I have ADHD)
I understand most of the time they are over-exaggerating their feelings on the matter. In posts about reblogging stuff from writers and artists it's always kind of a "LIKES DO NOTHING SHOW YOUR LOVE WITH REBLOGS LIKES MEAN NOTHING"
I've always found that a bit odd. As someone with two mutuals (one of whom is rarely online) and 1 normal follower my reblogs really aren't gonna do much so I mostly reblog stuff my mutuals might like and occasionally make my own posts. (Keeping everything else private for the most part) When I get a like it always brings a warm fuzzy feeling because it means someone enjoyed my reblog or post enough to share with me that they liked it.
I've only had one post that breached containment and it was a fun weekend of checking out the blogs of people who liked it! All in all I think maybe people are just unaware of the anxieties that come with being online and the people who experience those anxieties are too anxious to really speak up about it. I mean look at me I'm chilling behind an anon mask rn (I rarely send an off anon ask lol.)
For a website dubbed by its users as the neurodivergent website, some people forget to consider that learning and working within the culture of a social media platform can be extremely stressful for many types of people, let alone an autistic person such as myself (the ADHD doesn't help either). Some of us would prefer to lurk in our private blogs, only coming out of our comfort zone when we feel ok to do so.
All in all, a reminder to reblog is perfectly fine, but please refrain from the guilt-tripping and social obligation type of thing— or at least be aware of it and try not to be offended if one of your mutuals struggles to reblog.
Now this is all my personal perspective, other people will likely have completely different experiences but I wanted to share in case people were confused on why it's an issue for some people. Thanks for reading this whole thing and I hope you have a lovely day <3
I think I get what you're saying -
For a lot of people it genuinely takes a surprising amount of guts to put themselves out there on the internet in any way, even if it's anonymously, and that includes things as simple as reblogging a post.
It's not just Tumblr either. You also see it on Reddit and Twitter, and in online games where people just want to keep to themselves and not interact with strangers. Some people just want to lurk, maybe liking or upvoting, but not commenting or reblogging, because that feels like making yourself more "visible" somehow, in a way simply liking posts doesn't.
It's difficult to put into words, but I feel it's kind of like being in a university lecture with 50+ strangers. Liking is sitting in the back quietly taking notes. Reblogging is like putting your hand up and giving an opinion when the professor asks for one.
It's true that only reblogging actually contributes anything functionally, but there are plenty of people, especially neurodivergent people, who might struggle with that kind of thing, but still want to show some appreciation, or just save it as a bookmark.
So, I think that's partly why that kind of guilt-tripping or threatening reblog bait can be so stressful. Tumblr is a comfort app for a lot of people, who just want to curate their own little private space. Reblog baits are like someone banging on your door, telling you that you're actively doing something wrong by keeping to yourself, and (in the case of "I'll block/unfollow you if you like/read but don't reblog" baits) people will hate you for doing it.
It also implicitly takes away the sense of control you have over your own personal online space. Ideally, you should be able to do whatever you want with your own blog - no one should dictate your own online experience. So, if you just want to reblog things you like or want to share, at whatever pace you feel comfortable with, there shouldn't be anything wrong with that.
But reblog baits seem to suggest that you shouldn't have that control, and there are certain things that you have no choice but to put on your blog, and it has to be right now. And I feel that sense of having control suddenly snatched away from you without warning could also be a major source of anxiety for a lot of people who see Tumblr as a source of comfort.
With all that in mind, while I do believe that it's not quite this simple, considering artists and writers, and especially those who rely on commissions, do need exposure from reblogs, I also feel it's difficult to blame people for finding very aggressive reblog baits stressful, especially when you're suddenly blindsided with them.
At least, those are just my initial thoughts based on what you said, but absolutely let me know if you disagree with any of this or feel I misrepresented what you meant <3
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woe, the first wip wednesday of the 2024 be upon us
tagged by @socially-awkward-skeleton to share some wippy goodness today. here's some more katc interlude ii from gus' pov. please enjoy this VERY ROUGH draft (with brackets and everything!)
There, sitting in the chair beside Augustine’s bed, is none other than Joseph Seed.
Augustine nearly doesn’t recognize him at first. Not without the sunglasses. They’re a common source of ridicule among his co-workers -- “What kind of asshole wears piss-colored glasses, anyway?” is a common refrain amongst the townspeople whenever the preacher is spotted outside the island where he built his Church.
Once, back when Augustine was naive and new to town, he’d made the mistake of coming to Joseph’s defense. “Maybe they’re prescription,” he’d posited, believing it to be harmless speculation. “For migraines or something.”
He’d never been more quickly ostracized in his life.
It’d taken weeks to get back into his fellow rangers’ good graces, and even then it was only because Ben had convinced them to give him a second chance. “C’mon, he’s new. Kid didn’t know any better.”
Augustine learned to keep his mouth shut when it came to Joseph Seed and his family. If it’s taboo to say anything nice about the man, then he’d rather not say anything about him at all.
Hastily, Augustine lifts himself into a seated position and combs his fingers through his hair, trying to make himself look more presentable. “Mister Seed,” he starts, before realizing he has no idea what the appropriate honorific is. “Uh…Pastor Seed?”
“Father is fine,” he smiles. The corners of those bright blue eyes crinkle warmly.
“Father Seed,” Augustine corrects, but the way Joseph lips thin like he’s biting back a laugh tells him he still didn’t get it quite right. Anxiety coils tightly in his gut -- Already fucked it up -- but he swallows around the lump in his throat, pushing it down. “I ain’t mean for this to sound rude or ungrateful, but,” he hesitates a moment, warily eying the man in the doorway. Broad shouldered and donning an army field jacket, the man has a hardened and calculating look in his eyes; one that’s very similar to the look Sybille has whenever he drags her out to meet new people. He’s being sized up. This man is judging his actions, weighing his worth, and the rhythmic beeping on the heart monitor quickens at the idea that he may find Augustine wanting. His attention returns to Joseph’s curious gaze. “What are you doing here?”
“My brother, Jacob,” he motions to the man in the doorway, “told me about what happened to you last night. I wanted to make sure you were alright.”
Although Augustine’s pulse slows to its normal rhythm, blood rushes to his cheeks. “Oh,” he says dumbly. “I -- uh…” His hands clasp together and he bashfully averts his eyes to stare at his worrying fingers instead. “I’m okay. Been better, but…I’m alright.”
“That’s excellent to hear,” Joseph says gently.
Augustine nods and a long stretch of unbearably heavy silence settles over them. He chews on the inside of his cheek until the bitter metallic tang of blood bursts on his tongue, wracking his brain for a topic of conversation, but he comes up empty. “I’m sorry,” he says after an awkward cough. “I ain’t much of a conversationalist and I’m…Well, I wasn’t…”
“You were expecting someone else,” Joseph nods. [insert something about the compassion and understanding and warmth in his voice, rather than the anger and hostility augustine anticipates]
A lame, “Yeah,” is all Augustine can muster in response. His fingers fidget nervously in his lap. “You, uh…You ain’t happen to know if my sister’s here, do you? I gave Ben my phone so he could call her, but.. Um…” he trails off again. Whatever drug they’ve been using to sedate him and numb the pain has also stolen the second half of most of his thoughts as well.
Joseph sighs heavily and his brows knit together. He removes his glasses, neatly folding the arms and tucking them into the breast pocket of his vest. A warm hand comes to rest on top of Augustine’s clasped ones.
Augustine knows what that gesture means. It’s what Mama did when she sat him down to tell him that she had cancer and what the kind paramedic did when she told him she was sorry for his loss after he’d found both Mama and Daddy dead in the living room. It’s the kind of comforting gesture one gives before delivering bad news or condolences. Yet as Joseph’s long, spindly fingers wrap around his own, the warmth, accompanied by a sympathetic squeeze manages to keep the knot of anxiety in his gut from growing larger.
“The phone lines have gone down,” Joseph murmurs. “I’m afraid we haven’t been able to get through to her yet.”
Augustine’s eyes go wide. “The phone lines are down?” he repeats. The County is no stranger to strong winds ripping through the valley, but last he checked the forecast hadn’t predicted anything strong enough to knock out the phones. “What happened?”
taglist: @marivenah, @florbelles, @statichvm, @fourlittleseedlings, @wrathfulrook, @harmonyowl, @ivymarquis, @carlosoliveiraa, @cassietrn, @poetikat, @confidentandgood, @strafethesesinners, @trench-rot, @miyabilicious, @simplegenius042, @g0dspeeed, @inafieldofdaisies, @josephslittledeputy, @aceghosts, @adelaidedrubman, @madparadoxum, @voidika, @strangefable, and anyone else wanting to share a piece of their wips!
#wip wednesday#wip: kneeling at the crossroads#i'm turning off editing brain until i finish the chap so things are gonna be rough#also yes. ben was playing 'secret peggie' the entire time. for intel purposes. no one suspected he was one of jacob's chosen#at least not until he slaughtered his co-workers who were on duty during the reaping <3
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hii as someone w selective mutism, and after seeing your post regarding yuki being mute, i’ve had this question that wouldn’t leave my head: were kisa and yuki actually selectively mute or was it due to traumatic mutism or something else? maybe i’m just self-projecting, but despite us being mute for different reasons (it is possible to have SM from trauma, though it is rare), i always saw myself in both of them when it came to their muteness (i’m really sad yuki being mute was only touched on in kisa’s ep and then never brought up again) so their characters mean a lot to me. just thought I’d bring this up and ask since there isn’t any discussion surrounding this and from the posts that i’ve seen on here, people just seem to go w kisa having SM (and by extension yuki) and just say that it’s canon. being the projector that i am, i also assumed it was but still never thought it was “accurate” rep but then again, does it have to be? regardless of how it’s shown in the anime/manga, i think we’re all entitled to our own opinions on this, and that no matter what we think caused their mutism, all opinions r valid! i’m just so curious on what your take on this is since no one mentions anything like this in specific.
hello! funny you send me this ask today because i just rewatched the first ep of the reboot last night for the first time in a looooong time and have been thinking about fb all morning! as far as i understand it, selective mutism is an anxiety disorder that can definitely be triggered by trauma, and that is how i read yuki and kisa. i'm sure you have a deeper understanding of it than me as someone with that experience, but in my research on this (which admittedly was a few years ago) it seems there is a variety of reasons why children are selectively mute, one of them being abusive environments and a predisposition to anxiety disorders. i would absolutely argue that both yuki and kisa have intense social anxiety, even outside of their mutism; and that yuki, aside from diagnosing him with something, is a perfectionist, and perfectionism often stops people from doing things.
i was also really sad yuki's mutism was only touched upon, so i actually wrote a whole fic about it! i think this is an incredibly interesting aspect of yuki's character. yuki in childhood has no autonomy at all: his life is controlled by his mother, then akito, and akito does not listen to him (or anyone). the other zodiacs ignore him, and he becomes tokenized as the rat instead of viewed as an individual. very often, yuki shrinks into himself as a reaction to this. he already has to keep physical and emotional distance from his peers due to the curse, and his oppressive home environment pushes him to even more extremes. i think so much of yuki's mutism is a maladaptive acceptance that he will never be listened to and that what he feels or thinks does not matter, and so he sinks into a depression where one of his copes is silence. even after this episode, he continues to be softspoken and keeps his cards close to his chest—which is why i love his relationship with kakeru so much, because kakeru coaxes him out of his shell. after meeting kakeru, he begins expressing his opinion more candidly and becomes openly emotional in ways that are supported by kakeru's view of him as a human being. yuki spends so much of his life being objectified as either the rat or the prince (both similar roles where he is being held to an extremely high standard that is only an archetype and robs him of individuality and humanity) and he plays the roles that are assigned to him. it is only when he is shown true love and acceptance through tohru that he can begin to learn who he is outside of those perceived roles, and allows him to express himself as yuki in front of kakeru, who never bought into the prince thing to begin with.
i think the other thing about fruits basket is that it is very tropey, and selective mutism in the way it is portrayed in fb is very much a shojo trope moreso than it is a real portrayal of a disorder. i don't think natsuki takaya is "trauma informed" as we would call it now, as it was written 20 years ago inside of a culture that notoriously does not take mental health seriously. i think yuki and kisa's mutism is very much a narrative choice, so i definitely agree with you re: what you're saying about "accurate" rep. anyway thanks for the ask and your serendipitous timing! thinking about that rat boy <3
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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks....
You're all good! This is the first time I've been asked this. I'm usually terrible with favorites so I always feel like I don't pick the "best" in hindsight, but I'll try to be as accurate as possible. These will also be in no particular order since they all occupy such different areas.
(edit: I just realized in my incredible morning brain state that this said male or female, but I only read the female part haha. So this is just the female lineup, I guess).
Iwakura Lain - Serial Experiments Lain
Lain's a character that has, and will always remain enigmatic. Subjectivity and personal experience remain intertwined with works like Serial Experiments Lain, so what each individual takes away from it will change. Personally, what makes me love Lain is her desperation to communicate, to connect with the people around her. To make friends, to do fun things with them, to understand the people that comprise her life. But that desire spirals, she gets absorbed (like so many do) and becomes something else entirely. Fracturing and separating herself, spreading those instances across the internet in a desperate way to connect. For existing prior to essentially all forms of social media, it depicts the struggle and addiction that trouble countless people in freakishly accurate fashion.
Iwakura Mitsumi - Skip and Loafer
Had to put them next to each other on this list haha. Iwakura Mitsumi though. I don't hate the approach of a lot of Shojosei in terms of high school slice of life/romance, but I find much more to love with the more grounded ones than the more fantastical, just a personal preference. Anyways, Mitsumi. She's just the perfect representation of high school life. A dash of confidence, a good bit of deep seated anxiety, lots of stress over school and friends, but a positive and hopeful outlook in spite of her stumbling and struggles that's wonderfully accented by blossoming feelings of love. She just occupies a space that is very rare these days, so of course I love her.
Ryougi Shiki - The Garden of Sinners
Okay, hot take since (spoiler) Saber's not going to be on the list. I just haven "completed" Saber's story if that makes sense. I've read a lot, experienced a lot, but I haven't gotten 100% of it like I have with Shiki. That said, Shiki's story. I mean, as a character they're so damn hard to really capture. After all, there's more than one of them, and their story is told through the experiences of others. Shiki as a character, and The Garden of Sinners as a series, just holds a special place in my heart as Nasu's first real creative work that remains untethered by the requirements of a visual novel. If Nasu's work on the VNs is the base level, then The Garden of Sinners stands a cut above from start to finish.
Hatsuseno Alpha - Yokohama Kaidashi Kikou
A robot that is startlingly human, but surprisingly childlike. Alpha was is just the perfect vehicle to experience YKK through. Vast understanding and interest, but meaningful naivete and curiosity. She explores a world peacefully accepting its death, and is able to pull such beautiful moments from it. She doesn't struggle or bemoan the end, but rather takes it in stride and focuses on the beauty of humanity, how it's adapted, what's been lost and what's been created in its stead. It brings it all together under this character that is so deeply passionate about exploring life even under these circumstances, that you can't help but feel an indescribable warmth in her story.
Biwa - Heike Monogatari
Okay, maybe I'm cheating a little bit with Biwa here, but it's just a character that I think is incredibly beautiful. Witnessing the murder of her father, she's taken in by a clan doomed to death, where a man possesses a similar ability to Biwa. Together, she struggles to create the family she never had, all the while forced to come to terms with their deaths. She fights tooth and nail to keep them alive, but her attempts are futile. In the end, she is given her adoptive father's ability and completes what one might call the "cycle". Seeing life and death, the eternal struggle that will never change, she experiences her life, her family, her future and past to its fullest, and commits her life to telling the story of the Heike that she was so fond of. It's a beautiful story centered around Biwa's experiences, and her fear of death and not having a family, truly wonderful stuff. Also Aoi Yuuki kills it as Biwa.
Kusanagi Motoko - Ghost In The Shell
This was baby's first big kid series for me. I'd always watched anime here and there, but mostly things like Bleach/Naruto/DBZ. Ghost in The Shell was the first really big series I'd dip my toes into via those 4 minute YouTube videos at 480p. Kusanagi's nature as the bridge between technology and humanity is endlessly explored and just such a great idea, that through the countless (good) iterations, there's a wealth of her to experience. Undoubtedly an iconic series, and one that's certainly remembered very fondly by me.
Kirigoe Mima - Perfect Blue
Mima's an incredible character driven to the psychological breaking point. Under the scrutiny and pressure of being an idol, the facade begins to crack and what seeps out from the gaps is nothing short of incredible. Satoshi Kon remains a wizard in what he did with his works, and for me, Mima's character in Perfect Blue is the pinnacle of that. An implicit story of the stress and strain placed on idols (and the entertainment industry at large) by those that string them up and sell the souls of these girls, Perfect Blue and Mima remain in a realm of their own in a lot of ways.
Nozomi - Sonny Boy
Well as they say, the proof is in the pudding, and the pudding in this case is Nozomi's name. Translating from Japanese it means "wish" or "desire" in English, and is the personification of Nozomi's role in Sonny Boy. As close to a catalyst as one can be, she spurs on the wishes of the characters around her, providing the foundation for our main character Nagara to grow and develop. In the end, the desires of each individual can be connected to Nozomi, even in her death. She's arguably more central to the plot of Sonny Boy than Nagara, so of course I see her as a deeply special character.
Kamikoshi Sorawo - Otherside Picnic
A somewhat different pick to help round out the list. Sorawo Kamikoshi, and Otherside Picnic at large, are certainly things that I don't think most people would fall in love with. But I did. The vitriol that her character expresses, the toxicity and self hatred and destruction. Her character is a very damaging and "bad" one, but that's what I love about it. There's no grand scheme behind Sorawo's personality, or any ideal that her character chases. She follows the whims and curiosities of her life as she willingly casts herself into the abyss of the Otherside alongside Toriko, and along the way, she learns to slowly grow and improve as a person while maintaining her core personality.
Osaki Nana - Nana
The duality of Nana as a character is just so well done to me. A character with two sides isn't anything special, but I think the way that Yazawa approaches her as a character, and introduces those cracks in her façade and the struggle that they represent is just really, really good. It has me really desperate for Yazawa to return from hiatus and continue on with Nana.
And that's the list. I know I've left off characters like Tohru or other massively popular (and well written) leads and characters from shojosei series, but a lot of what I desire out of a character can't quite be found in a lot of what ends up popular and translated (and what I tend to remember) I feel. If you take a look at the list, for example, you'll find that the majority of my favorites are from older series, as well as ones that feature more "tragic" or "twisted" characters. Personally, I find a flower most beautiful after you've understood how it's wilted and withered before it fights to bloom once more. Endless blooms that grant an eternal summer are undeniably beautiful, but that beauty tends to lack context and in turn can become simplicity. So that's my list, as imperfect and everchanging as it is. If I'm asked once more in a year, it will probably look startlingly different, but that's how these things will go with me.
#serial experiments lain#lain iwakura#lain#mitsumi iwakura#iwakura mitsumi#skip to loafer#skip and loafer#shiki ryougi#ryougi shiki#kara no kyoukai#garden of sinners#alpha hatsuseno#hatsuseno alpha#yokohama shopping log#yokohama kaidashi kikou#ykk#the heike story#heike monogatari#motoko kusanagi#major motoko kusangi#kusanagi motoko#gits#ghost in the shell#mima kirigoe#mima perfect blue#perfect blue#satoshi kon#sonny boy#shinichiro watanabe#sorawo kamikoshi
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Jane Austen Characters and Neurodiversity
Jane Austen wrote characters who feel so real and interesting that scholars have been arguing about them almost since they were written. People identify with many aspects of characters that probably weren’t intended by the author, including reading Emma Woodhouse and Charlotte Lucas (among others) as queer. Headcanons are great and if you see yourself, as a neurodiverse person, in an Austen character, that is awesome. This post is only my opinion and I’m not an expert. It is also impossible to make a diagnosis based on a 200 year old book.
The main reason I don't attribute the behaviour of Jane Austen's characters to anything clinical is because I think Jane Austen was trying to show how wealth and the single-minded pursuit of wealth can twist people. Darcy is in the top 1% (or even the top 1% of the 1%) and even today, those sort of people don't come off as normal even if they are neurotypical. I think most of the characters' behaviour can be accounted for by 1. being extremely wealthy/powerful meaning they are unchallenged in a way that magnifies their faults, 2. the fact that most of these people don’t have jobs and are therefore idle and under-stimulated (even a lot of the ones who have “jobs”), 3. attention seeking behaviour and 4. being surrounded by fawning Yes Men.
There is also the complicated discussion of maybe neurodiversity would explain some behaviour but it does not excuse.
There are only two Austen characters that strike me as having some sort of possible psychiatric illness or neurodivergence: Mr. Woodhouse (Emma) and Anne Steele (Sense and Sensibility).
Anne Steele is the only character who is actually incapable of following social rules. She is about thirty years old, and yet twice in the novel she is kept from making a huge breach of decorum by her younger sister. She is obsessed with Marianne’s clothes/appearance, to the point of asking what the fabric and washing costs. Importantly, Anne is not wealthy or powerful enough to ignore social rules. She is trying to court favour most of the time and yet cannot manage it without Lucy’s help. Also, she is distressed that Lucy will no longer trim her bonnets, which suggests she is incapable of doing it herself. I’m not sure how difficult it is to change ribbons in a bonnet, but it stood out to me as a little odd.
The other is Mr. Woodhouse. He is tricky for me. We are told he’s basically been like this all his life, so it’s not a case of dementia (though that could be making him worse).
The evil of the actual disparity in their ages (and Mr. Woodhouse had not married early) was much increased by his constitution and habits; for having been a valetudinarian all his life, without activity of mind or body, he was a much older man in ways than in years; and though everywhere beloved for the friendliness of his heart and his amiable temper, his talents could not have recommended him at any time. (Ch 1)
Also, his health anxiety can’t only be a manifestation of grief from losing his wife, because again, we are told he’s always been this way and he married late in life. One of the interesting things is that he’s not just worried about his health, he is incapable of imagining that other people are unlike him in their health or even thoughts. That is a failure of theory of mind, a major developmental milestone.
He could have some form of anxiety, probably comorbid with something that accounts for his inability to understand others, but then again, he’s a very rich man that no one ever disagrees with... which makes me think there is a chance he’s just a health conspiracy theorist who’s gone off the deep end. This would fit better into Jane Austen’s overall thesis that wealth screws people up too. (Note: Isabella is very similar to her father. Anxiety disorders can run in families but she does seem to tolerate being challenged better than her father.)
Lastly, despite being so concerned about his health, Mr. Woodhouse is never actually ill during the novel, while other characters do have recorded illnesses. Isabella, who shares her father’s fears, has born five healthy children. So whatever is wrong doesn’t seem to effect them physically very much.
Another Note: I have heard an argument for Fanny Price having ASD based on her inability to stand the noise or eat the food at her home in Portsmouth. I found this compelling, but I think we are meant to understand that the noise is overwhelming and everyone else is just used to it.
Last Note: To reiterate, I am not arguing that anyone’s headcanon is wrong. A headcanon is meant to be something that can’t be proved or disproved by the book. I just personally don’t see enough evidence in the text for most other characters to fit a psychological diagnosis or neurodivergence, especially Darcy. Being the coddled child of overindulgent parents who told him the planet revolved around him because he was so rich and important seems like a pretty good explanation for his behaviour to me! (and is what he says in the book).
#neurodiversity in austen#jane austen#this is how I read Austen#I think she was describing the human condition under wealth#I think we sometimes forget that these are all pampered trust-fund kids#and people wishing they were trust-fund kids#many of the men are absurdly wealthy
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good morning kat!! i would love to read how u view and write the brothers / dateables <33
Ahhhhhh thank you! I was probably going to do it anyway but I’m so glad you sent this <3 OKAY! So some of these are probably similar to how others see/write them but I feel like I have a slightly different feel for a few of them. I really just wanted to do this so my followers could kind of get an idea for my writing before they get whiplash or something aksjaj ALSO I’m only to lesson 35 so if you read some of this and go “kat they literally covered that in the game” I’m sorry but I’m stuck way behind.
LUCIFER - The Overworked DILF
So I think we can all agree that this man is severely overworked and is in desperate need of some dick/pussy and probably worries about things he shouldn’t. I hate the idea that Lucifer doesn’t like/doesn’t care about his brothers!! “He’s always rude to them” “He never lets them have fun” yes I know but you have to remember he’s Avatar of Pride. I feel like Luci isn’t an ass just to be one, it’s his Sin that makes him come across that way! He’s the prideful oldest brother, in real world conditions he would be the oldest sibling who graduated Valedictorian and went off to an Ivy League school and your parents constantly brag about. These kids normally are the most stressed people alive, they do it because they feel like it’s expected of them not because they think they’re better than everyone else. Lucifer acts like a jerk sometimes because his Sin forces him to basically. I also think once Luci becomes comfortable with you, that tends to fade away, he’s less strict on his brothers, he’s a little more open about his feelings, he might even start complimenting them more often. Lucifer loves his brothers and I feel like he would sacrifice a lot to make them (and you) happy.
💖 MAMMON - The Loverboy 💖
I could write a ten page essay on Mammon…actually I could probably do one for half the brothers. ANYWAY My biggest peeve is how the game (and some fans) make him just “the stupid greedy brother” you can not convince me Mammon would ever steal from MC, you just can’t. “But he likes to sell things for money” yes, but you know greed doesn’t solely refer to money? I see Mammon as the touch starved demon who falls head over heels for you, he would do anything for you, you ask and it’s done, no hesitation. This boy is so smitten with you it’s unbelievable, he truly is a simp, look the word up in the dictionary and it’s just his name next to it. Why?? Because after he develops feelings for you he becomes greedy for your love and attention, he doesn’t care about your money or possessions he just wants your affection. If you don’t love him? It hurts but it’s okay he just wants a friend who treats him nicely. WHILE ON THAT TOPIC I DO NOT BELIEVE THE BROTHERS ARE THAT MEAN/CRUEL TOWARDS HIM. I think they tease him but I also believe they respect him. I feel like Mammon is actually very smart, he just doesn’t apply himself at RAD because he has better things to do like stare at you all day. I write Mammon as a very loyal friend/lover. I also write him as clingy/needy because he is, he wants to be with you because you show him so much kindness he can’t get enough.
LEVIATHAN - The Shy Boy
*gently slaps his shoulder* This bad boy can fit so much anxiety in him! I relate very hard to Levi and his socially awkward ass so I understand his tendency to lock himself away. I think once he warms up to you and you guys become friends he’s more willing to leave his room and even the house. I think you would somewhat become a security blanket for him, in the sense that he’s only comfortable going to a big social outing if you also go, he doesn’t have to be directly next to you but he at least needs you in his line of sight to feel better. I think Levi has of course had a few friends here and there, be it online only or maybe another socially awkward demon at RAD, but I think you would be his first true friend. He would open up to you about literally everything, he would text you about every new anime releasing, he would ask you to come game with him/watch a new show constantly. I guess I agree with a lot of his in game personality but I also think he becomes attached to you, I think you help him come out of his shell without him even realizing it, you give him confidence to just be himself and not be as envious of others.
SATAN - The Hopeless Romantic
As someone who struggled with their own anger issues when they were younger, I have many strong feelings about Satan and I do not vibe with the “cold and closed off angry brother” idea. I see him as someone who works hard to keep his anger in check because he doesn’t want to harm/push away the ones he loves. I think he still has those moments that he does lose control but they’re few and far between, I think you would be a major source of comfort for him. He’s quick to spot the similarities between the two of you and wants to form a close bond but also fears hurting you, if you take the first step to get to know him more then he’s all in. He wants to learn more about the human world and is willing to teach you whatever you would like about the Devildom, together you can learn about the Celestial Realm and what it holds. This boy is 100% a hopeless romantic though, when he catches feelings for you he is immediately trying to sweep you off your feet in every aspect BUT he wants everything to be perfect, straight out of a romance novel perfect. Also I’m very biased, I also love and adore animals so I fully support cat lover Satan however I think that Satan loves all animals, cats are just his favorite.
ASMODEUS - The Hypeman
I see Asmo as so much more than “the gay bestie who likes to gossip” like I’ve seen a few fans strip him down to. While I 100% think Asmo is always down to gossip with you I also picture Asmo as the ultimate therapist friend/hypeman. He’ll listen to your problems and give you advice, if you have a crush on one of his brothers he is immediately trying to set you up. He knows how to play the game (because he invented it basically) so he gives you tips on how to make them fall for you. I also see people just leave him as “the sex crazed brother” and yes, I think Asmo would give you some of the most mind blowing sex but again, I see more than that. Most people see Lust and immediately associate it with sex, lust is just an intense desire for something but not specifically sex. I see Asmo as someone who, after years of sexual lust, meets you and starts to lust after a sincere friendship/bond. He’s full of his own insecurities and wants someone he can be open with and share those feelings, I think Asmo would actually be willing to tell you about his insecurities once the two of you formed a stronger bond. I also see Asmo as a total drama queen, the first to know any “secret” and the first to run to you with info on his brothers.
BEELZEBUB- The Gentle Giant
The fact that the game made his personality “food” makes me so mad. Beel is 10000% friend shaped and just wants the best for his family. I see him as a big bear honestly, he’s very sweet and innocent but if you piss him off he will destroy you. I don’t think he would be afraid to body check a bitch into a wall for insulting one of his brothers, I see him as extremely protective over them all, not just his twin. This is my own personal opinion but I think Beel would give the best hugs :( <3 I also think he would be an amazing listener. Since he’s up late at night, due to hunger or insomnia, you can always talk to him when you’re having trouble sleeping. If you ever need to just vent to someone but aren’t really looking for advice, Beel is the one, he listens and he has his own thoughts on the matter but he knows you really just need to talk it out. Just…big boy…big sweet boy💖
BELPHEGOR - The Brat
OOOOOHHHH LET ME TELL YOU! So, in regards to lesson 16 if you want my thoughts on that hot ass mess go read Vicious (not a shameless plug just gives you a better idea on how I feel about that situation). With that being said (and if you’ve read the fic) I think Belphie would have a loooot of guilt for what he did. I think he would feel like shit once he realized how much you mean to his brothers, I think he would feel completely ashamed and would do whatever it took to make it up to you.. He wants to be close to you, he wants to be friends, he wants to have your attention as much as his brothers do. I think the fact that you took the time to set him free would hit him hard, after spending so much time alone he wants to be involved in things but has major guilt for what he did. I think if you ignored him for a while and forced him to see how much his brothers love and adore you, how they would do anything to make you happy, he would cave and beg for forgiveness(in private of course). If you eventually let him get close to you he’s going to act out when he doesn’t get his way and will be the ultimate brat, he’ll pout when you spend too much time with one of the others, he’ll lay in your lap anytime he sees you sitting on the couch, he’ll hold onto the back of your shirt when you guys go out in a group so he can stay close to you. I think he’s 100% a brat but also has tremendous guilt for what he did.
SOLOMON - The Smartass
Okay so you know the classic “little boys will pull the pigtails of the girl they have a crush on” that’s Solomon. Regardless of your gender he’s going to pick on you and he’s going to tease you. The man has been alive for thousands of years, he has met so many other humans but you’re different, he wants to get to know you more. I think Solomon might be a little out of touch with current human culture/ways of life but if you try to introduce him to it he completely adapts to it. I think he would be so thrilled to have another human around, the two of you would become best buds and just say the most random shit and bust out laughing. Introduce him to memes and he immediately starts making his own about the Devildom and they’re hilarious, show him old Vines (exposing my age lmao) and the man is wheezing. I think he’s also a sarcastic little shit, he likes to push buttons and see if you push back, I think he gently bullies his friends. Being an ancient wizard can be lonely so I think you restore a little bit of his humanity and give him a little piece of his childish behavior back.
SIMEON - The Sweetheart
Sweet baby angel help 🥺 I see Simeon as very respectful and innocent BUT he also wants to join the fun. I think if you and Solomon were goofing around he would ask to join, he wants to understand the jokes, he wants to play the dumb card games, he wants to be more involved!! I think Simeon would also be a great listener and would also try to give the best advice. I DO NOT THINK HE WOULD TRY TO FORCE RELIGION DOWN YOUR THROAT I one time saw someone say that Simeon would try to make you “see the light of God” or whatever and just…no, I don’t feel that. I think Simeon would be very respectful of your choices in all aspects of life, just because he’s an angel doesn’t mean he can’t be friends with people who don’t follow his God. To each their own obviously but that’s not how I’ll write him, I don’t think he would bring up religion at all unless you specifically asked him.
LUKE - The #1 Little Bro
LUUUUUUKKKEE Best little angel!!!!! I see Luke as that younger sibling who is SO impressed and in awe of everything you do! He thinks you make everything look easy, he tries to mimic the way you do things, he tells all his friends about you! I think, while at first he may be upset about it, Luke would fully support you if you dated one of the brothers. He would love for you to date Simeon but as long as you’re happy that’s all that matters! He would go to you for advice on how to do things and if you tell him you’re also bad at the thing he’s just like “oh well then it must be impossible because you can do ANYTHING, so I don’t care about it” he just thinks you’re so cool and amazing even if you don’t think that about yourself. <3
✨Bonus✨
I don’t write for these two quite yet because I’m still getting a feel for them but thought I would include them💖
Diavolo- The Golden Retriever
Before I get slaughtered let me explain: Everything I’ve seen so far in game of Diavolo is a guy who has no real cares and wants to hangout with his friends doing literally anything, he does not care as long as he is involved. Obviously I know he has more going on being a prince and all but like I said I’m not that far in game. My current interpretation of him is: super happy Prince who desperately wants to be a normal guy for just one day and see what it’s like to not have the entire Realm in your shoulders.
Barbatos - The Mystery
Barbatos (I say this lovingly) you bitch… LET ME LOVE AND UNDERSTAND YOU I hate that we get such little screen time with him because ??? He seems to have some dope powers, also he basically raised Dia so this man has seen some shit and I wanna hear stories about what he has experienced!!!! All I know of him so far is: Loyal Butler and Afraid of Rats. I want moooooreeee I want to write for him so baaaddd.
#obey me#obey me shall we date#omswd#obey me mammon#obey me satan#obey me lucifer#obey me beelzebub#obey me leviathan#obey me asmodeus#obey me belphegor#obey me asmo#obey me belphie#obey me solomon#obey me simeon#obey me luke#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#the void responds
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Dazai analysis after reading No longer human
English is not my first language and maybe I'm not very good at this, it's my first analysis. :)
In this analysis I compare Dazai with Yozo (the main character of No longer human) to try to deduce the reason for Dazai's behavior.
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Despite Yozo and Dazai's obvious similarities, such as recurring jokes and gloomy thoughts/outlooks on life, Dazai doesn't seem to exhibit the social anxiety Yozo has, as well as the extreme need to please others.
So I'll use a few things in the book to describe him.
(I am not saying that what I write is the truth, but how I am interpreting it)
On the one hand, he is apparently seen as an extrovert, joker, energetic, shameless, lazy, and obsessed with suicide. While on the other hand he is seen as a cold person without any kind of empathy, moral conscience, manipulative "without feelings", depressive. Being supposedly his true form of being. The only change that can be seen that marked him was the death of Oda, the only person with whom we have seen him have genuine feelings, so he is not a person incapable of feeling. Oda asked Dazai before he died to be "on the side of those who save" so Dazai did, he went to the side of the "good" not necessarily because he wanted to change but because the only person he had connected with he asked, and maybe he held on to this to keep living, but then why does he keep trying to kill himself? I will venture to say that it is simply because he does not find a genuine reason to live, it is not something that has come out of him but an external message.
In my opinion, this is a clear example of Dazai not getting over Oda's death (since he's the only person he ever connected with). It can be seen that for some reason he does not form affective bonds with others unless it is superficial, thus being able to manipulate and replace them. After reading the book, I think this doesn't really mean that Dazai does this out of the simple essence of being a bad person, but because it's what depression combined with trauma does to some people. While we don't know much about his past, just being in a mob at such a young age is a trauma, although it's obvious something happened to him before he was picked up by Mori.
He is a person who has no sense of right or wrong or any kind of morality, allowing him to keep his options open, which gives him more chance in the anime/manga to make "bad" decisions regarding others. If I remember correctly, Yozo (main character of No longer human, on which Dazai is somewhat based) talked about precisely not feeling human, not being able to connect and understand the emotions of others, which led him to live in loneliness and feeling different all his life, I couldn't explain if this is because of depression, or if on the contrary this is a reason why depression develops (not really important here). But I think this fits pretty well with Dazai and why he is this way (in the sense that he betrays everyone regardless of whether they were/are his teammates), because maybe he doesn't feel like he belongs somewhere, so we could essentially describe him as an individualist person.
Regarding Dazai's duality, I don't think any of the two parts he shows are really 100% his complete self, since one is a farce and the other is the crudest form of his depression. He is simply a person who is incapable of understanding others or incapable of feeling connected to anyone because he is traumatized and because he has a tendency, whether consciously or not, to disguise his feelings, which is why he sometimes seems insensitive or incapable of reacting to horrible things. , it could be said that "he doesn't care about anything" at first glance, which is common in depressed people. The only time that something was appreciated regarding his feelings was when he was with Oda in his last moments of life, and frankly, he was seen as a rather lost person; "what should I do?" He asked, that's when Oda told him to be on the side of the good guys. Etc. What I mean by this is that he is capable of having affective ties, I insist a lot on this, I know, but it seems to me that it is something that should be understood.
Dazai is a person without a reason to live who unconsciously clings to some concept; like joining the Port Mafia, Oda, the Agency, or even it can be assumed that also the fact of looking for a person to commit suicide with is.
On the other hand, I think its important to take into account the possible similarities between Yozo and Dazai in terms of toxic behavior towards the people around him. If I understand correctly, Yozo ultimately turned out to be, for whatever reason, a liar and an alcoholic who took advantage of the people around him, being taken in by women in their homes and spending their money. We can't see this in Dazai, but he is seen as a bad partner, since he hands over his tasks to others and doesn't keep his promises, clear proof that he is possibly a rather toxic person.
Did he really change when he left the Port Mafia?
Yes and no. For obvious reasons, the experience in the mafia in full development age as it is from 14 to 18 years old, and the death of the only person who mattered to him is obvious that it would change anyone. He is not a person immune to the things that happen around him.
This is already in the perception of each one but I honestly think that Dazai changed a bit, of course he is still the same person without moral values and etc, that is why he continues doing what he does, because these are behaviors that simply cannot be changed because you decide so, you can simply "repress" or "hide" them, the latter is exactly what he does.
But it is obvious that he has changed when his bandages decreased and he shows himself with a different attitude in front of others. The Port Mafia vs Agency setting is completely different and that would present minimal change to either.
This is already in the perception of each one but I honestly think that Dazai changed a bit, of course he is still the same person without moral values and etc, that is why he continues doing what he does, because these are behaviors that simply cannot be changed because you decide so, you can simply "repress" or "hide" them, the latter is exactly what he does. But it is obvious that he has changed when his bandages decreased and he shows himself with a different attitude in front of others. The Port Mafia vs Agency setting is completely different and that would present minimal change to either.
Although Dazai doesn't seem to have a complacent demeanor like Yozo, he does say things that make him seem kind and then doesn't follow through, like when Chuuya asks him to take him somewhere since he's very weak afterward for using Corruption, Dazai tells him yes, and then leaves him. Or like when he congratulated Akutagawa for getting stronger but didn't apologize for how he treated him, yet he didn't make a bad impression.
He doesn't get over Oda's death;
Oda gave him a reason to be on the Agency, what he is doing is probably just to "finish" that request. If he had accepted Oda's death, Dazai would have committed suicide long ago (his suicide attempts in the middle of the anime being impulsive and recurring acts of his own behavior).
Bandages:
His character designer confirmed that the bandages were drawn to represent Dazai's obsession with suicide. In my case, I prefer to think that it is so, that the bandages are to cover his suicide attempts, but also injuries from the mafia and, (small headcanon) perhaps scars from morphine injections (Yozo injected himself with morphine).
My opinion is that he is a character who avoids suffering at all costs, using both the "good" and "bad" facets to avoid confronting himself and not feel vulnerable. We can see that he seeks to escape at all costs from what he suffers apart from this, with the fact that he drinks too much alcohol. Which in turn could justify his obsession with suicide, since death would mean feeling no more pain.
I feel that Dazai, if we compare him to Yozo, surrounds himself with others and makes changes to avoid himself. Yozo saw no point in eating, and only ate because the others ate and he was there. So perhaps it is more likely that Dazai himself would be incapable of cooking for himself (in one chapter it is seen that he only eats small cans of food), and would do things like change the environment to find something that makes him have desire to live, even if it turns out to be unsuccessful. This leaves us with obvious contradictions such as why he would seek a reason to live if what he wants is to die, because he does not seek death itself, but rather the end of suffering. I would undoubtedly classify him as a character with a very advanced depression, which is what we can see both in the anime and in the author's novels, as well as his addiction to alcohol.
//
I honestly don't really like the type of person he is, but that doesn't really mean he's good or bad in bungo stray dogs or as a character himself. I would really like to see him show his feelings at least once. Although if you ask me, I think he ended up committing suicide at the end of the series.
#bungou stray dogs#dazai osamu#no longer human#bsd#bsd analysis#osamu dazai#dazai headcanons#osamu headcanons
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Do you have any advice for gaining confidence to post online? I've been a lonelita for a long time and I really wanna make connections, but I live over an hour away from the nearest city with a comm group on fb and my anxiety is so so bad... I used to have an ig where I occasionally put up coord shots and such but I found that the platform wasn't a great fit for me. If you're willing to talk about how you got started on Tumblr, it might just be a big help.
i find that i was in a similar situation myself, i do have some advice!
posting online could be scary for a lot of reasons, especially posting personal things that mean a lot to you such as photos of yourself or your coords.
i completely understand you on that front.. despite running this blog for 4-5ish years or so, it took me a long time (until pretty recently actually) to feel comfortable posting more photos/details of my life that i would otherwise have considered private. i'm not in a comm (similar to you, bad anxiety! and autism gives me a little trouble socializing irl) or on any other social media either, so i consider the other lolitas and mutuals i make on here to be my only connection to the community if that makes sense.
i would say that fear stops a lot of people from doing the things that they want to do. you'll never know what it's like if you never try it out. you should take comfort in knowing what things are like for you now.. and knowing that you can return to that and remove yourself from any new situation you put yourself in if you truly find that you don't like it or find comfort in it.
i find that being a lonelita is.. lonely, as the name implies. though posting about lolita, sharing content, thoughts and ideas and such.. adding little tags on photos i see and sharing my opinion on new releases, posting little snippets on fun days and sharing a coord here and there, exchanging a few words with mutuals every now and then and seeing what they get up to in their posts, is honestly really enriching. it makes me love the fashion even more. you deserve to have an outlet to express yourself. people will see and appreciate the passion you have for it. just about everyone loves to see someone expressing their love for something that means a lot to them. you might even inspire others to do the same!
take advantage of the fact that only you can set your own boundaries based on your comfort. you can make your blog be whatever you choose. maybe you don't want to share every detail of your life and only feel comfortable posting or talking to people about certain things. maybe you feel more comfortable posting only your coords or wardrobe and excluding your face. you are entirely in control of what you share! and adding to that, you can tailor your online experience on here to not see things you'd rather not see by using tag filters.
the lolita community on here is very friendly and welcoming. everyone has been very sweet! it may not be the biggest or the most fleshed out, but it's comfortable here and feels more like home than a social media. if connections are what you want, i think you would find tumblr to your liking. i say take the chance! i'm always looking for new lolita mutuals if you'd be interested in that. i would definitely be glad to see you put yourself out there more!
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🌼Hi Pinnie,How are you? Are you eating well? Hydrating? I hope so!
Can I order something?
So, I have panic attacks/anxiety, my body gets very tense resulting in terrible pain in my spine and esophagus, I can't think properly and basically I breathe less than I should, anyway, it sucks.
Usually these attacks happen when I end up getting worried, stressed or anxious about something or about something and although more recently the pain is not so absurd and I am managing to control it, it still ends up happening sometimes.And nowadays they are happening frequently because of family problems.
Can I have something about Breg calming his s/o in a panic attack? I wanted something cute and maybe smut too, I wanted to distract myself a little cuz I spent all day in a crisis, it was a tiring day and your writing makes me very happy .
It's ok if you don't want to write ok? Don't force yourself. Anyway, I love your writing and I'm always waiting for you to post or reading your posts during the night (as I'm doing now)
Kisses from Brazil, bye bye 💕💕💕🌼
[Hey, hang in there, okay? 🤍 I can write comfort for this scenario, however, I'm not sure if I can fit smut into it very well. And thank you.]
Panic attacks are something Breg's familiar with, unfortunately.
And while his usually result in unintentional self harm or damage of property, at most the death of someone who might have provoked him- They're episodes he has been having less ever since he's been allowed to live with you, be close to his mate.
It absolutely shatters his heart to see you go through something similar. While the breeder is very socially clueless, he will be able to interpret the starting signs of a panic attack strikingly fast. Which, unfortunately, makes him panic.
See, Breg is not the best at dealing with panicking people, because he himself absorbs others' moods like a sponge, he's very nervous and alert, and he will enter a minor panic as well, which just creates a negative feedback loop.
Breg is not going to touch you. He knows better than to try to touch someone who is panicking or speak too loudly, but he will block most of your vision. Look at him, just look at him. The breeder will attempt to loom over you in a protective manner but definitely backs off if that only serves to exacerbate your state. It's a bit of trial and error until he understands what works best to calm you down. You'll immediately be moved to a quieter, slightly darker location and he will surround you with every comfort item he knows you own.
Breg might then try to distract you with water and food, menial things to get you out of your own head. Why don't you lie down? With him. Can he join you? You'll be fine, he's right here and he's not going anywhere. The moment you're okay with physical touch, the monster is all over you, planting kisses everywhere and uttering quiet reassurances, returning any gesture you may or may not have done for him when the breeder had his own fits of panic.
Breg won't ask you to talk about it. You don't have to. He keeps a lot of pain from you too, and you respect that, so he's going to extend that courtesy to you. If his mate just wants to be held until they're functional again, he's more than happy to provide that, ready to hold onto you and put your head to his chest so you can ground yourself in the steady beating of his heart.
Sex... Well, sex can be used as comfort, he would know, the breeder can actually calm down a lot faster with the sensual and caring touch of someone he loves. And while Breg is conscious enough to not outright start touching you sexually in a state of panic or recovery, he will quietly suggest if you'd like him to make you feel good for a bit, as a distraction.
He can be extremely gentle during these instances and won't bring up penetrative sex of any kind. The breeder will focus on mouthing at you and gently bringing you to orgasm while praising and encouraging you to enjoy yourself. To tell him what'll make you forget about the entire world around you except for him, your loving mate.
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Sorry in advance for treating this like ‘Dear Abby’ but I am in need of some advice from a Queer Adult TM…
So, I have this friend who I’ve known for about ten years now. We’re seventeen right now, so let’s just say we went through allllll the phases together. We realized we were queer together, we had our first fandom experiences together (they were actually the person who introduced me to fanfic, which I’m really grateful for, because ever since it has been an integral part of my life), we were DeviantArt furry artists together circa 2016, it was a lot of embarrassing but also fun times. We are also both… and quite mentally ill and it was nice to have someone to help me through the worst bits (when I didn’t have access to therapy or meds) and how I could help them in return.
Lately (maybe over the past 2 years?) we’ve been drifting apart. I think it has a lot to do with the fact we don’t have many common interests anymore (they stopped caring about mine, and stopped sharing theirs with me), but we still do a lot together. They’re my coworker, a member of my ttrpg group, etc. etc.. Due to social anxiety they were my only friend for many years but now I have a few more, so I don’t mind not being as close to them (and I dislike putting the burden of me being reliant/clingy on them). However, they’ve recently been making it harder and harder for me to keep that friendship.
They smoke weed, get shitty stick and pokes, binge energy drinks and shoplift. I don’t have any moral issue with any of those things, but it’s concerning to me because I know they are not in the the right headspace to make those decisions about substances (and the rest). We have both struggled with mental illness, self-harm, and eating disorders. Part of the reason I drifted away from them is because they have no filter and “vent” about their problems to the point where it is very triggering to me (especially in terms of sh and ed). I don’t mind lending an ear but I also have boundaries that I put in place for myself… But yeah, even though they have access to treatment it seems not to be working, or there’s something hindering it. It really hurts to see them in such a bad place because we started out in similar places in regards to our mental health and now that I’m in a better place, they’re not.
I genuinely love and care about this person, but it’s so hard to help them when they shut down every form of help I + the rest of our mutual friends can offer. They’re very manipulative, I would like to think without meaning to, to the point where they twist my words around (for example, recently they did something extremely inappropriate and when I told them I was concerned for their well-being, they said they were sorry for making me “uncomfortable”). They’re also one of those people that plays oppression Olympics, and insists their parents are homophobic and tried to send them to conversion therapy— I know their parents very well, they are literal leftists who have pride flags in their front yard, campaign for politicians that support queer and trans rights, and attend one of the only completely gay-friendly and supporting churches in the area. But the way they talk about them causes other people to dislike them and think they’re homophobic, which they have noticed. I think it’s cruel to them, and also symptomatic of a larger problem that my friend has— they don’t seem to understand that their actions and words have consequences for other people.
I guess what I wanted to ask was: is it worth cutting this person off? I have a feeling that we were naturally grow even farther apart as we go to university, because our values are very different… They’re an anti, I’m not, they have a very surface-level views of politics and believe everything they read in Instagram infographics, I don’t. I don’t consider myself very mature, but they look very immature next to me. Besides, being around them often ends up negatively impacting me as well. However, I worry that cutting them off will makes things worse for them. I don’t want to see them get even more hurt. My confrontations haven’t been doing anything, but maybe they’ll come to their senses eventually.
I really don’t know what to do in this situation, but I’d appreciate any advice from anyone willing to offer it.
--
Since you're about to go off to college, I'd let the friendship naturally fade.
It's not your job to save this person, and I do think you need to get away from them since they don't seem to be making an effort. But since you're naturally drifting away anyway, I don't think having a big, dramatic friend breakup will help anything.
On another note, everyone should have a moral objection to shoplifting. Not only is it dishonest and a sign that something is fucking wrong with you to shoplift, but shoplifters directly hurt retail peons who will get their pay cut as a result of store losses.
People who do this aren't sticking it to the man. They're parasites who hurt other nobodies.
The fact that a lot of teens (American teens?) think this disgraceful behavior is normal enrages me.
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Hiiii! Happy new year love! 💞 I hope your shipping game isn't over. So let me introduce myself. 🫶🏻
Sun - taurus
Moon - Pisces
Rising - Sagittarius
I tend to be very introverted, however if I meet someone who's also very introverted, I kind of take the lead and become very extroverted, especially in situations where someone has to take action about a certain thing.
I like to think I'm open-minded, trying to understand everyone's perspective no matter what. I only respect and appreciate people who respect me too!
I overthink a lot and I get pretty self-conscious about myself. Im also very stubborn. I wouldn't say I'm very ambitious considering that I get demoralized easily and I need someone to support me especially emotionally. As much as I try to keep calm, I lose my temper very easily, but I'll quickly get over it if I get a few minutes to spend alone and really process the situation. I get overwhelmed a lot and I'm in constant stress. I have severe trust and abandonment issues.
English is not my first language and I'm a polyglot. I speak my mother language (I don't want to say what language it is), English, French, German, mandarin, Italian, basic Latin (I had to learn it in school 😔) and I'm currently learning Korean. My major at uni is history and I'm living in the balkans. (Maybe the last part wasn't necessary 💀)
I love history and foreign languages and cultures, I also love writing, drawing, fashion and reading!
Since I was 14, I do many fashion sketches.
My love languages (that I like to give to my s/o) is drawing them, physical affection and words of affirmation.
I also would love to receive praise and physical affection but if my s/o isn't okay with that then it's alright. I can live without it as I've been doing until now.
I like to read non-fiction, history, thriller and fiction literature and you can ask me anything about history and I will tell everything you like I'm some voice narrator on a documentary 😭
I watch mostly just documentaries and thriller dramas.
So as I've said at first, I'm introverted, but if I'm comfortable I quickly am very loud and social, however my social battery dies fast so I will at some point become suddenly silent. I also have adhd and anxiety. I used to suffer from depression since I was a little kid. I've got plenty trauma 😊 and I'm very scared of the dark and insects, like spiders for example.
I don't like dancing and singing, mainly because I'm bad at those 💀 and I also don't like painting.
Usually I'm the therapist friend and I never share anything about my personal life to my friends, I keep my problems to myself.
I love cats and skincare and I listen to music constantly ever since I was a baby.
I'm not very fond of petnames that couples use. However if someone calls me "love" or "darling" I will simply die
I can get quite possessive and jealous, but I don't usually show that to my partner or do anything about it at all. Mostly because I know it's a toxic trait so I keep it to myself as I don't want to potentially hurt or make my s/o feel bad.
I'm very loyal and loving. When people yell, don't let me speak or interrupt me while I'm speaking I get either very pissed or i simply just cry 🫠 I can get very triggered when someone yells at me
When I'm hurt, affected or upset about something that someone did to me, I will isolate myself and not tell them what's wrong until it's too late.
I dont like people telling me what to do.
I'm sorry if this was very chaotic written and not organized at all, I just wrote whatever came to my mind about myself (watch me forget to mention some important details about myself 🤦🏻♀️) but yeah, basically this is me. 🫶🏻
I would ship you with Yoongi and Hobi!
You and Yoongi have super similar personalities imo, so I feel like you would understand each
other really well! Like even the way you described sounding like a docu narrator reminded me of
how Army joke that Yoongi’s a walking encyclopedia on so many topics!😭(also Pisces are really
great matches for earth signs like Taurus)
Yoongi and Hobi both have very supportive, reassuring energies, and tend to be the therapist
friends as well, so I think they would be good at helping you open up and making you feel safe. I
also feel like they would lowkey be a bit protective over you.🥺
I also kinda feel that you and Hobi would be a pretty good match! You have several similarities,
and he also has this ability of bringing out the best in people and making them feel really
comfortable, so I feel like he would be your ultimate hype man!😊
Hope this was okay💜
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social interaction is so weird. I don't understand it.
at my birthday party yesterday, I just sort of sat there. and watched and listened. and occasionally responded to something someone said. my brother and my friend did most of the talking. it's easy for them, they just know what to say and/or they don't care how they seem to others. they just talked to everyone the whole time.
I don't know, it just feels pointless. I want to like it, I really do, but when there's more than maybe 2 or 3 people (maybe 4, depending who it is) I just feel like an animal trapped in a cage. it feels really bad. it's not fun, it's just stressful. even when I like everyone there and everything is completely fine.
and when everyone leaves I'm just so relieved. I always want to talk to people more, I miss the times when I saw my friends more often, but when I do see them I just want to leave. like, I don't know what to do about it. I did all the things my therapist told me when I was in therapy but it changed nothing. it doesn't feel like I have social anxiety (though yeah okay that too - but it's better now with meds), it's like they're speaking a different language that's sort of similar but I can't quite understand it. I really want to and I try to pretend I do but I can't and it sucks.
like, my therapist would always tell me I can do it, there's no reason to be afraid of social situations because I'm really good at them actually. but no, I was good at therapy because it was a short period of time, I knew the rules and what was expected of me, I knew the only other person there, and I just. lied all the time about everything so she wouldn't be angry with me. I was so afraid she'd think I'm just wrong that I still had to pretend I'm normal.
#I complain about this every time#but just. what do you do about it#practice never made it better. actually it made it worse because I was always exhausted from being around people so much#like when I was going to class every day and practicing everything my therapist said. didn't help. just made me even more tired#I don't know#at one point today I got so overwhelmed that I just thought right this isn't working let's just pretend to be eliot. I don't even know what#that means but I just. idk. being me doesn't work it's just not good enough#it's possible that I really am just autistic. I don't want to say that because I don't have a diagnosis but. idk I guess that's how it feels#I feel so out of place. I had to try so hard not to go get one of my dolls and brush their hair to calm myself down#but that'd be weird so I can't do that#so I just sit there and wait until it's over. and maybe occasionally look at some gifs on my phone. look it's okay my fictional people are#still in there I can still pretend I'm with them!#what the fuck is wrong with me?#personal
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Do you mind if I rant a bit here? I just want to get this off my chest.
After sorting out my thoughts I have come to realize I’m trans. But I still feel very trapped, unable to truly express myself because of certain people in my life.
when I messed up I was always asked “why are you so stupid?” “Are you dumb?” “You have no common sense?” Etc And those words have become my inner voices scoldings, making me anxious and shy in public yet everyone around me told me “social anxiety is something you just find cool, stop playing around.” The truth is, I’m not playing, but they don’t care do they?
When I was diagnosed with a medical problem, my opinion didn’t matter, I was constantly ignored, anything I wanted to say, they never heard. I was just someone who was there.
when I styled my hair the way I wanted, giving me a bit more confidence, making me feel like the REAL me, my family demanded my hair to go back to the way they wanted. It suddenly made me feel guilty which felt wrong, yet could they have a point? By trying to be happy, am I hurting someone else?
What would they think if I ever came out to them about who I really am? Am I killing the person they knew and loved? Am I disappointing them?
am I being over dramatic by writing this?
Oh nonny, this is a safe place for you and you can rant all you want.
First of all, I am so proud of you for sorting your thoughts and realizing that you are trans. I know its not easy sometimes to come out. Not everyone understands what you go through.
I can only say that you are loved and appreciated the way you are. This is a safe place for you to be who you are. I know many mooties on here who are in a similar situation like you.
If I may suggest - please reach out online to other folks who understand you. Regarding the ones who are close to you in real life and don't understand? Wait maybe for a time when you are independent of them and then come out. Cause then they can't pressure you into feeling any other way.
And remember:
Don't ever feel guilty for styling your hair the way you want.
Don't ever feel guilty for dressing the way you do.
Don't ever feel guilty for who you are.
You are not dumb... You are beautiful the way you are. Always remember that. Don't ever let anyone else dictate who you have to be or how you have to look or behave.
If you ever need to vent again, feel free to send me an ask. Or dm me.
💙😘
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everytime i try to talk with a school therapist about my social anxiety, they just say that i just need to talk more socialize more and all my anxiety will go away... they never understand a single thing
- 🪦💤
and totally unrelated, theres this two classmates that make me fucking uncomfortable till i want to puke
hey 🪦💤 anon,
yeah, socialising more isn’t a cure-all for social anxiety. it’s not like you have a few conversations and start to feel better. it’s not like social anxiety is just a term for when someone hasn’t socialised in a while and needs to get used to it again, brush up on their social skills.
social anxiety is fear. real fear. it’s not something that arises from lack of experience. yeah, positive social interactions can teach your brain that the Bad Consequences (judgement, humiliation) aren’t always going to happen. and that can lessen fear.
but the world isn’t all positive interactions. and a few negative ones can worsen the fear. really, a person needs a support system, coping strategies, they need to have tools for communication, and they need to know that they’re worth something.
‘socialise more’ without any accompanying advice, is a throwaway that won’t alleviate the anxieties.
have never heard of a ‘school therapist’ before. where i was, we had counsellors. seems similar but am not sure. but from experience, think i got lucky.
my school counsellor didn’t force me to speak to her. spent a lot of time sitting in silence. she told me it wasn’t my fault that i was so anxious; told me i was very strong because dealt with such high levels of anxiety all the fucking time. encouraged me to build support system, but didn’t push it. she taught me techniques of harm reduction and anxiety management.
don’t know what your situation is, if school therapist isn’t helping with anxiety, maybe you could ask them to help with a referral to another therapist. if they truly want to help you, they won’t take offence at this and will provide resources. they can help fill in forms and chase them up if waiting lists are long.
also, i think the ‘socialise more’ kind of advice might not be on the level of help you need.
i learned the hard way that there are levels of support that’s given to people. this varies place to place. but i think the principle is the same: many many people seek support for their mental health and most of them don’t need support for mental disorders. they need help for relationship issues, or maybe they’ve been feeling overwhelmed or stressed lately, but not disorders.
so the cheapest way to train professionals to help that many people, is to offer only basic and brief training. where i am, this is the difference between low and high intensity cbt.
‘socialise more’ might be the basic life advice that’s needed by someone who’s feeling a bit nervous in a new place for the first time. but for someone who’s struggling with an anxiety Disorder, it’s not the right help.
also those classmates sound like assholes, go ahead and puke on them. 🌹🌹🌹
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Oh gods I hope I don't bother and am not late for this! If I am, I'm so sorry! I'll give this a try!
Can you match me up with one of the DBD killers?
I am a 21 year old female. My sexuality is straight.
My height is 5'9. I'd say I'm more of a curvy and a bit thick shaped lady. My hair is over my shoulder ans I dyed it pastle pink. I also have a piercing on my cartilage. Dark brown eyes. I usually dress in darker clothing. I wouldn't consider myself goth but I'm mostly into a grunge alternative style. Though I mostly dress in an oversized dark hoodie and jeans so nothing special. I have many scars for many different reasons; One is over my eyelid and another dark scar on my thigh which they stand out a lot more than normal scars. I also always have black nails, either by painting them or getting them done. They're usually pointed and long.
Personality: I am mostly in introverted person. I'm not as social because I feel like I'd annoy people. My social battery is also limited. I have anxiety which also causes me to feel nervous around strangers or going out to places. Although I am a very talkative and I'd say funny gal. I mostly make sarcastic comments and joke about people if they're comfortable with it. I'm also at times courageous into trying to get put my comfort zone so I'd be more comfortable around other people. I am easily excitable and don't get offended easily. I take care of my friends and family before myself. I am also very patient with people and don't get annoyed easily. But when I'm angered I tend to keep it inside since I don't like to show my negative emotions to others. I like to say I'm kind and gentle to people I meet u til I get to know them so I won't offend them. Once I know the person well and their limits, I can be very outrageous and weird to be funny but only enough to not make them uncomfortable. Sometimes I even like to play small jokeful pranks on people. Although I also lie when I have a feeling it's needed. A very bad habit of mine.
Hobbies: I like watching specifically any horror and sci-fi movies. I also read books and spend my time coloring. I'm mostly interested into any sort of arts or crafts such as sculpting or theater/dancing. I do also like to make costumes of horror. I love to collect cute plushies and stickers. I am also a gamer playing any sort of game that peaks my interest (horror, survival, rpg, and games similar to Apex or CoD). I love to write stories. Not just fanfictions but anything that comes up in my dreams as well. I like to learn about animals as well.
I hope this is enough! Also thank you so much for this if you pick me and for your hard work as well! Have a good day! ❤️
I think Philip Ojomo | The Wraith would have a soft spot for you.
Philip finds it admirable how great your care and concern for others is; the gentleness and patience you display is something the world is incredibly, incredibly lacking in, and he cannot help but to have a soft spot for you once he knows you well enough.
Thinks your hair color is incredibly beautiful. One of his favorite things to do is run his fingers through your hair while the two of you are cuddled up together.
Absolutely understands the limited social battery thing; Philip is fairly introverted - though he does enjoy the company of those he cares for - and often spends time off by himself alone. He's very understanding about any time alone you may need (whether alone means alone with him, or alone alone).
He, maybe surprisingly, can be a very calming individual to be around. While he's silent, Phil can be very gentle when he wants to be, and he would be more than happy to be there to soothe you during moments where your anxiety is particularly bad. He's more than willing to help you step out of your comfort zone, however that may be.
Enjoys your outrageous, wild sense of humor! While he may not get every joke, Philip loves it when you're in a good mood and are playful; he isn't bothered by any teasing you may deal his way, and your well timed sarcasm is well received.
Philip, as we know, went through a lot in his life prior to being taken by the Entity, and as a result he, unfortunately, still carries and is full of that same rage he felt back then. You're one of very few people who can help ground him on particularly bad days. Not cure or fix it - but he'd never hurt you (outside of being forced to during trials, when push comes to shove, which even in those he does not enjoy), and is incredibly grateful to have a partner who extends patience and understanding his way.
Philip does not like lying; it goes hand in hand with betrayal to him, and he will make it as clear as day to you that you do not need to lie to him about anything. He is more understanding than you may think.
I can see Philip having a knack for certain styles of art, or at least appreciating them. His bell is often adorned with sigils painted on with soot during trials, and even if some may say they don't count as "art" technically, he does have a delicate hand when applying them. He'd be interested in seeing anything you make, and he would love it if you ever read to him any of the stories you've written!
#request#anon#matchup#matchups#match-up#match-ups#dbd matchup#dbd matchups#dbd match-up#dbd match-ups#dbd x reader#dead by daylight matchup#dead by daylight matchups#dead by daylight match-up#dead by daylight match-ups#dead by daylight x reader#philip ojomo x reader#the wraith x reader
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