#makes me alittle anxious not knowing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cypherthesuccubus · 2 months

Text

I’m not done with you yet….darling~

Alastor x Reader -Part 1- (NSFW) (MDNI)!!!!

WARNINGS: smut, blood kink, bondage, slight S&M, Dom/Sub, rough rutting, mate marking, leash play/ownership, slight degradation, praise kink, body worship, ass worship, cock worship, she/her pronouns, vaginal sex, creampie, facial

Other Tags: Fluff, Angst

Note: Reader will receive aftercare

I hope you guys like this!! I’m not the best writer, but I wanted to write something for y’all. Enjoy Part 1~😈 @starlightdreaming and everyone who voted 🥰

The sound of smooth jazz was playing softly through the dimly lit room. The fire place and a simple floor lamp being the only light source to help see through the darkness. Shadows danced around the room almost as if they are anxious to do more than outline the elaborate decor. In the corner of the room was a lush scene of a forest with tall trees and thick grass coating that part of the hard wood floor. In the middle of the forest scene sit an elegant little table and chair; resembling something you would see at a luxurious cafe. A ominous figure; sitting cross legged in that chair; humming the tune that was playing while tapping his foot that touch the grass floor. Setting his mug down on the table; flipping through the news paper. Alastor hums at the current topics being discussed; finding them amusing that such things would even make it into the papers. Proper entertainment was a thing of the past it seems. He wished he could drum up some chaos like old times, but he knew he couldn’t on account of Charlie and the others. Where’s Mimzy when you needed her to bring the fun around? Oh well~ there’s only so much he can do when he has other priorities to attend to. Soon enough he’ll be able to find some proper entertainment eventually, but of course right now, Charlie is currently hosting a group activity downstairs to welcome a new guest to the hotel. Better not disappoint and make a bad impression on the new arrival. Putting the paper down while fixing his bow tie; Alastor stands and makes his way towards the bedroom door; putting alittle pep in his step while folding his hands behind his back; holding his staff while putting on his signature awarding winning smile like always.

(Y/N’s P.O.V)

“A shot at redemption didn’t sound so bad. Maybe I should give it a chance before I make any rash decisions.” I thought as I approach the newly refurbished Hazbin Hotel. Funny name for a hotel, but I guess it fits. I didn’t even have a chance to knock on the door as it was yanked wide open. There stood in the doorway was Ms. Sunshine herself; Princess Charlie. She definitely was much taller in person that’s for sure. Her smile was definitely the brightest thing to ever grace hell with its radiance. Hard to believe someone as bubbly and sweet like this was born here in hell. “HEY THERE!!! WELCOME TO THE HAZBIN HOTEL!!!! I’m Charlie and I’m here to give personally give you a tour of this place!!!” She basically announced with so much excitement. I’ve never thought in a million years that there would be a chance to be redeemed after death. I mean if the angels could be killed, maybe redemption was possible too. Charlie takes me by the hand and leads me into the lobby where a little group demons were already gathered; sitting on the couches or on the floor. Almost like they’re having some sort of circle time. Charlie then leads me to the group and sits me down; facing the coffee table that’s sitting in the middle of the circle. “But before the tour, we had a planned group activity today where we all introduce ourselves. Since you’re right on time, did you want to go first new friend?” I shook my head “No I can go last…I don’t mind waiting to know everyone else first.” She gave me a reassuring smile and pats me on the back “Ok no problem!, you take all the time you need to prepare.” I sighed in relief. I’m not that great with introductions and being a little on the shy side was not easy either. I want to make friends, but sometimes I could never find the words to say. So often I tend to clam up if I’m too anxious. The intros started off with Charlie of course as she talked about her interests and what made her the most happy.

Then it went down the line with Vaggie; Charlie’s girlfriend; making her intro. Then it was Angel Dust after her; he definitely made me laugh with his sex jokes and constant flirting with this guy Husky? Turned out it was actually Husker; Husky was one of the many names Angel calls him to annoy the fuck out of him really. Then it was this cute little thing called Niffty. She reminded me of a doll from how tiny she was; just simply adorable. Then it was the emo punk like girl with a high ponytail; she called herself Cherri. I think I like her too just as much as Angel Dust. It seemed like they were already besties from how they interacted with each other. I hope they can consider me as a bestie too cause honestly they seem like they know how to have fun. It would probably help tremendously with this shyness of mine to get to know people better. Just then I felt a shift in my hears as if like on an airplane with the shift of pressure. Static like feelings was going up and down my body as if being shocked gently. In the corner of my eye I see this shadow rise from the ground to form a figure that looked to have deer like ears and two tiny antlers on top of the head along with a microphone like staff being held behind this figures back. The shadows finally disappeared to present the one and only Radio demon himself.

Dressed in his red pinstriped coat with black and red cuffed slacks to match his recently shined shoes. His black bow tie sat perfectly at the neck; making him look like the distinguished gentleman he made himself to be. His wide smile; unfaltering while it slightly glowed along with his ruby red eyes from him standing in the dimmer part of the lobby. Giving him an almost eerie appearance like a predator looking for its next meal. He approaches more into the light of the lobby now getting a better view of him in detail “Hello everyone! I do apologize for being a little late. I had some urgent errands to take care of, but now I’m finally here like I promised.” Charlie looks up at him and clasps her hands together “Oh perfect! We’re just going through the introductions now. Everyone pretty much just went through theirs except you and our new friend here.” She gestures to me with a cheery grin. That’s when his eyes finally locked on me. I looked at him back and instantly regret it. Once I locked eyes with him it seemed like his smile grew wider as his eyes darted down then back up. I looked down into my lap to hide my now flushed face. I swallowed hard from anxiety I felt at that moment. If he was the predator then he is definitely making me feel like the prey right now. It didn’t help he was also handsome to boot; making me all the more nervous. “Oh wonderful! Well the name’s Alastor my dear! A pleasure to be meeting you!” I look back up to him as to not be rude of course. When will I ever learn? He leans down in a bow staring straight into my soul with half lidded eyes; grin growing wider as he spoke in a lower almost sultry voice

“Quite the pleasure~”

(Alastor’s P.O.V)

How curious? As soon as spoke my usual greeting, this new guest instantly turned red and buried her face into her hoodie. I could have sworn I also heard a faint high pitched whimper as well. Interesting~ Charlie then speaks up “Ok Alastor!, now tell our new guest what you like to do for fun, and what makes you the happiest!” The annoying one, Vaggatha, turned to her “Charlie I don’t he’s gonna admit anything like that to us.” For someone who is as irritating as her she’s actually right for once. “Indeed so!” I look towards the new guest again; the feeling curiosity took over again, but this time I wanted to push it just a little bit….further. “Cause that is for and only me to know….buuuut~” I lean down once again as she just peaked her head out again “if curiosity gets the better of you…then who am I to stop you if you have “a little death” wish~” WHAT. DID. I. JUST. SAY?!?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!?! I WOULD NEVER SAY THIS!!!!! NOT TO ANYONE!!!! As soon as I said it, she let out another whimper this time; only it was a bit louder that everyone could hear it this time. She buried herself deeper into her hoodie realizing what she did. Looks like I’m not the only one embarrassing themselves at least. But seriously?!?! “a little death?!?!” I’ve never made innuendos like that?!?! I even shocked Angel for heaven’s sake?!?! Charlie then breaks the silence giggling nervously “Ahaha…ok how about this. New friend how about you just your name for now and we can go on that tour I promised earlier.”

She peeked one more time; nodding as she spoke with a voice almost like silk. “M-my name is (Y/N)….it’s nice to meet you all.” Charlie smiles at her “I love that name! It’s very pretty! It really suits you.” She approaches her and helps her off the floor “Ok everyone thank you for being apart of today’s activity today! We’ll see you all at dinner.” Everyone disarrayed from the circle and headed their own ways as I made quick haste into the shadows; transporting back into to my quarters. I start to pace the floor, running my fingers through my hair; trying to figure out why I made such a display in front of everyone no less. This was not like me at all, and I don’t understand why; which pisses me off the most!!!! Is it because I’m about to go into season?!?!? No it couldn’t be. I’ve always known how to maintain it really well. I’ve been around for a long time, and my seasons have never been an issue for me to control. Even when completely surrounded; still proved no issue. What is going on?!?! I take a deep breath and adjust my bow tie; dusting off my coat. I just need to keep my distance for a couple of weeks and maybe this will blow over when my season ends. Even if it isn’t, I’m still not taking any chances. No one will know about this…..not even her. I am the Radio Demon, feared by all and it should stay that way.

#hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin smut #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #hazbin alastor #alastor smut #alastor x reader #alastor x y/n #alastor x you #18+ post #18+ content #18+ blog #18+ only #18+ account

290 notes · View notes

mirai-e-jump · 6 months

Text

TV Guide Dan, LDH Special Issue dan the Girls ft. Yuzuki Hirakawa Interview (translation below)

Publication December 1, 2023

-RESOLUTION-

"Hirakawa-san, you entered the entertainment industry after winning the Grand Prix in the vocal and dance category of LDH's, "LDH Presents THE GIRLS AUDITION" held in 2018. Please tell us why you took part in the audition."

Hirakawa: I've always liked LDH artists. I would go and see their live performances, and I watched "Weekly EXILE," a music information program that was being broadcast at the time. Then, I heard the announcement that they'd be holding an audition for female artists for the first time in a while. Before that, auditions had been limited to singing and dancing, but the auditions I attended included various categories, including singing and dancing, as well as acting and modeling. At the time, I wasn't interested in the entertainment world, but my parents and those around me recommended I do it, so I did it partially out of curiosity. However, as judging progressed, before I knew it, I won the Grand Prix…is how it felt. I like singing, but I didn't have any dreams of becoming a singer. After joining the agency, I took singing, dancing and acting lessons equally, and during those lessons, I decided to pursue acting.

"Winning the Grand Prix helped you in deciding to pursue a career in the entertainment industry."

Hirakawa: I was in my second year of high school when I won the Grand Prix, and I had to move from Kumamoto to Tokyo by myself, so I was determined, or rather, I felt I had no choice but to do it. The final stage of the audition was a training camp exam, where about 10 finalists spent a week together. While there, I met other kids who were seriously working hard to pursue their dreams, and I realized that I could no longer be half hearted in my efforts just because I had been chosen. However, when I made my debut as an actor in the stage play of "Moryo no Hako," I didn't know what to do or what was expected of me on the stage, so I just went along with things. It was only last year when I was cast as the role of Rita Kaniska (PapillonOhger) in "Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger" that I was able to proudly say, "My profession is an actor. Actually, before I was cast for the role…there was a time when I was wondering if it was okay to continue down this path, or if I should look for another one. That's why I was so happy when I was chosen to play the role, and thought I could continue as an actor. However, I was alittle anxious before the broadcast started. Rita is the king of Gokkan and the Chief Justice of the International Court of Justice, but their gender isn't clearly stated, and their face is almost invisible, being hidden behind their collar and hair. Since this type of character hasn't been seen in the Super Sentai series before, I couldn't predict what kind of reaction we'd get from the viewers. But thankfully, the positive feedback I've received since airing started has made me enjoy filming even more.

"We feel that characters who don't specify their gender are appropriate in the current era."

Hirakawa: I'm grateful to have been given such a role. I've always thought that my appearance, personality and voice were (gender) neutral, so I was happy to have landed the role of Rita. At first, Rita was a calm and quiet character who didn't say much, but as the story progressed, they're able to rely on others, and gradually become able to express their feelings in public. Slowly, their humanity and cuteness is showing, and I hope that my performance will make the character even more beloved.

"We feel like it's more difficult to express a character that changes gradually, rather than one that changes drastically, but do you find it difficult?"

Hirakawa: I'm not sure…personally, I don't find it that difficult. More than the changes of Rita in the story, I think the relationship between me and all the cast members were the biggest change. As filming progressed, the relationship between the cast members deepened, and I feel that we're able to understand each other. I think this naturally led me to express myself in the role. The atmosphere when Rita and their retainer, Morfonia (Hasegawa Kasumi), are together has also changed. Of course, this happened after the halfway point of the story, but it also reflects the fact that the cast members have become closer to each other.

"And now, "Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Character Book: The Bonds Connected by Moffun and Racules?!" featuring Rita, Morfonia, and Hymeno Ran (played by Murakami Erica) is on sale. Please tell us your thoughts after looking back on the photo shoot and interview."

Hirakawa: In the TV series, Rita and Hymeno, and Rita and Morfonia are sometimes filmed together, but this is probably the first time that Hymeno, Rita, and Morfonia are together. This was the first time doing an interview with the three of us, so it was very refreshing. Rita is called the "Immovable King," a character with very few movements. So, there aren't that many posing variations, but Hymeno and Morfonia moved alot to add variety, so I felt thankful for that (laughs).

"In episodes 32 and 33 of the TV series, there was a collaboration with "Zyuden Sentai Kyoryuger." You co starred with Shiono Akihisa-kun, playing the role of Souji Rippukan (Kyoryu Green), who also belongs to LDH."

Hirakawa: The day after it was decided that I'd be appearing in King-Ohger, I had work to do with Shiono-san, and when I told him, "I'm going to be your junior in Super Sentai," he said to me, "I know it'll be a tough year, but please do your best." He also said, "I hope we can work together again somewhere." At that time, I never imagined that I'd be able to work with Shiono-san in King-Ohger, so I was really happy when the collaboration episodes were announced. We only had one day of filming, but I was able to hear stories about the "Kyoryuger" days, and I was deeply moved by being able to appear in the same scenes for the first time. The collaboration episodes were directed by Sakamoto Koichi, who's famous for his action direction, and although we had to fight more enemies without transforming than usual, since I like action, it didn't bother me, and it was a valuable experience. I'm also working with Amano Kousei-san, another senior at LDH, who plays Grodie Leucodium starting from episode 30. Since Grodie is Rita's enemy, they have many scenes together. Amano-san is very considerate, lending us things to cool our necks when we were on location during the hot season. Also, he gets involved with me on Twitter, and is a really funny and friendly person. However, once he gets into his role, he completely changes, which I think is amazing.

"Since our magazine mainly features men, we'd like to ask what kind of men Hirakawa-san likes."

Hirakawa: Someone who's firm and flexible. When he messes around, he'll completely mess around, and when he talks about serious matters, he's serious. I'm the type of person who gets excited when I'm having fun, so ideally, I'd like someone who has the same enthusiasm as me, and to take the initiative and have fun doing whatever it takes, instead of being drawn away from me (laughs). Also, I think it's wonderful if he can say, "Thank you" and, "I'm sorry" for even the smallest of things, and if he cares about family.

"If you could be reborn, would you prefer to be male or female?"

Hirakawa: I'd like to be male. I used to play with my brother, who's 5 years older than me, and his friends, and I wanted to be a boy too.

"Well then, if you could be a man for one day, what would you like to do?"

Hirakawa: I wonder…(taking time to think), I guess I'd do some muscle training. If I can become a muscular man like Kaku So-san, my co star in King-Ohger, I'd like to go to the gym and train my muscles until he admits defeat! Kaku-san said he can bench press 120 kg (265 lbs), so I'd like to aim for that too and show off my muscles to everyone (laughs).

#👀#ohsama sentai kingohger #kingohger #super sentai #rita kaniska #rita kanisuka #moffun #my scans #my translation #toku cast #kingohger cast #yuzuki hirakawa #hirakawa yuzuki #tokusatsu #ohsama sentai king ohger #king ohger #tv guide dan

144 notes · View notes

imjusttrynalive · 6 months

Text

Just a little rant

Hi everyone, this is my first post here and I'm going to be talking about my LOA journey. As of now, it is the 7th of December 2023 and I've always known about manifesting ever since grade 9 when I found out about subs. And got a little success from one and then never got any afterwards, then I found out about loa and had a few successes here and there but I never thought much about it and then till May when I stumbled upon a pin of a success story on Pinterest. I went down a loop hoke of Sammy Ingram, Neville Goddard, LOA Tumblr, etc and here I am now.

It's okay if you don't read this cause it will be long and I've always been holding myself back from making this blog because of some limiting beliefs of me not acting the way I should be if I had my desires. (Basically, my desired self wouldn't need to rant about my journey cause I already have it)

As I mentioned I found out about LOA through Pinterest and was very intrigued cause who wouldn't, people were getting massive success stories here and there and I also want to have my desires too. I then found out about Loa Tumblr and Sammy Ingram at the same time but started with Loa Tumblr. All the success stories here and the informational posts gave me a dopamine boost and I was very excited cause duh I could finally get what I wanted. But since I had a lot of limiting beliefs back then I would do robotic affirming causes that sounded easier to me and all the success I heard about people using robotic affirmations gave me confidence.

I never really went into the void up until a few months later in August but that's not important right now. As I was drowning in Loa's Tumblr I was also drowning in Sammy ingrams content and she also motivated me. Telling me this is my world and I can do whatever I want, I never have to wait for anything, nothing ever takes longer than three days, the void is the am state and also Neville Goddard. (I know this is alittle messy but I want to get everything out)

So you could say that my mindset was slowly starting to change and for the fact that I had always felt a little different form everyone else (I'm not a pick me BTW been single since birth and don't talk to boys either) and always felt lost. Like everytime someone would ask me where do I see myself in the future and what course I would like to do in uni, I was always blank and felt alittle sad cause it wa slike I was the only one that didn't have a passion for anything. Me finding about loa was like I had awakened from some deep slumber and started having desires od things I would also like to have.

Buttt because I was everywhere and anywhere consuming information like it was water. I had been getting doubts and alittle worried and sad cause at the end of the day if this whole thing was fake then I'd be stuck living a life that I really really hate. On one end I would see something say do this it works on another it doesn't. Here someone posts a success story everyone loves and here they say it's fake and loa isn't real. Here someone wad able to manifest their dream life on 2 days and another it took months. Another ine wa sthat self concept doesnt matter and the other side said it did. I was honestly just a mess, depressed, desperate and overwhelmed.

I decided to delete tumblr and just focus on robotic affirming which wa sbasically me affirming the whole day and because I was anxious and new to this I wpuld feel like I'm doing everything wrong if I stopped affirming and what not. Bow just because robotic affirming hasn't worked for me doesn't mean its fake and doesn't work. I was obviously going through alot and had many limiting beliefs and was trying to be logical with the law.

I and been robotic affirming for over a month and hadn't gotten my desires and again started overconfident cause why wanst mine coming in less than 2 weeks like everybody else's. But I still continued to perist and continued affirming and overtime I just naturally began to affirm subconsciously. I even stopped watching and reading loa content cause I had to stop overconsuming.

It was now in August when I still hadn't seen any results besides a change in my self concept like with how I no longer though everything was expensive but rather cheap and my inner conversations about myself changed.

I still was struggling with the whole ignore your 3d, circumstances don't matter, instant manifestation, deadlines. And especially the dead lines part cause I ajd planned to visit my friend for her birthday and give her a gift she had always wanted and thought I've got a month before her birthday I can have the money I'm manifesting by then. But it didn't happen. All my plasm were ruined and I became depressed again cause why wasn't I getting my desires like everyone else.

(I'm starting to tear up as I right this)

But I told myself it was okay, devied to rea dsome success stories for success ans saw a post that said something about believing in people's success stories even if I don't know whether they're genuine or not and how I've got nothing to lose and that I'm the god of my reality and nothing is impossible and all I and to do was perist. And persist I did. But this time I tried the void for the first time.

When I tried the void on the first day and till date, I wanst sure if I was supposed to stop feeling like I'm breathing or I wa sdoinv everything wrong cause I just ha dto be pure consciousness. But I did feel a few symptoms likes feeling like I was spiraling, itching but I cpukd still here the sub I was using and could still eel my limbs ams eventually lose focus. I qpikd affirm 30 times for every hour for 2 days and eventually gave up and got tired cause you know the void isn't the only method.

So back to affirming I went, but this time I had more desire than ever now that my self contained had improved. I worked a lost of Google docs and formed a routine. Iw pull affirm for 30 times in the morning and before sleeping but as time went on iwpuld feel like I wanst affirming for my other things so ny the time it was November I had 10 differently affirmations that I wpudl repeat 10 times morning and night including my self created loa rules.

Obviously all the posts that talk about not wanting it in the 3d only the 4d and not even caring if they even manifest or not were giving me anxiety. And I deleted pintrest and tumblr to stay away from loa amd focus on my self. But lawd, isn't my 3d just my biggest enemy.

I wa scolding in my emotions till the 17th of October when I finally cracked and journaled about my lack of success and how everything keeps getting worse and worser in my life and time keeps on moving and everything I don't want to happen keeps happening. And I'm just an average girl that's just wants to live her dream life like everybody else and I feel like I'm always doing everything wrong even though I affirm to myself saying that I'm doing everything right.

I finally read bambis post on manifestation and it gave me hope. Again my self concept has improved form how iq a sin the beginning but every once in a whole my emotions catch up to me and i end up ranting and crying cause in my current 3d I'm still ugly and poor whilst I know I'm everything I want in my 4d.

So right now I've finally gone to uni and it's not my desired uni or the time frame I even want to go to school to and ive inky been here for 3 days and realising how other girls are so much more prettier than me, have better clothes, have friend sto hangout with and basically are living their best lives. I couldn't help but feel lonely and the whole day I've been trying not to think about it cause I know comparison the worst thing I cpild even do to myself right now but I can't help it.

I can't help but look at other people living my dream life when I've been trying and peristing for 7 months nows and still haven't gotten one desire of mine. I even reas bmneveiless book to gain more insight on me being the creator of my reality and understood things alot better.

Compared to me now and me when I first found out about loa alot has changed mentally and I'm wrintg this knowing that I'm still going to persist and affirm but I just ha dto let my feeling out and cry alittle(and by that I mean for 2 hours and right now as I type this)

So yes I've made this blog caus edits been something I've been wanting to do and to gold myself accountable. It's late rn and tomorrow I'm going to evaluate myself amd see what I'm doing wrong and give my all again for the nth time cause at the end of the day I've got nothing to lose amd I'd rather try and fail to get my dream life than not try at all.

And I always tell myself that its either my dream life or nothing at all cause if for some reason I'm the only being in this e tire universe ethat can't even get one desire put of my lost of desires. I'd rather die than live I life that I don't want to live in.

I'm not going to proofread this now. im tired mentally and physically, so I'm sorry for the grammar mistakes. I'll probability proof read later.

But I'm going to keep updates on my journey maybe tomorrow this week or this month. But I will come back with a success story.

#loa #loassumption #loassblog #manifesting #manifesation #dream life #dream girl #void #affirm and persist #affirmyourreality #affirmations #neville goddard #accountability #persistence #rant #loa success

2 notes · View notes

abeinginsand · 9 months

Note

i am not looking forward ti getting mt wisdom teeth removed at all and i'm too sleepy to actually write so i'm just gonna share my ideas with you for the time being heheheh i just mmmmm i really like the idea of taylor being extra susceptible to overheating and suddenly fainting bc well i myself have faunted before so theres q little projection there and also the fact that with fainting its not smth you can hide or avoid your body just fuckin shuts down you know so even if taylor insists that he's fine he still ends up blacking out

ohh understandable, doctors appointments always make me alittle anxious too. Thank you for sharing, love reading what you come up with always! Yes, projecting can be fun for sure and great points too. Not able to hide the discomfort and surprising Taylor himself and everyone around him is a very good idea to explore Speaking of his issues with temperature regulation. Awhile ago I was thinking about how maybe when demons get sick they can experience regular fevers like a human would but also there's a chance of a freeze in which the demon's body starts freezing over to get rid of the pathogens and one of the warning signs of this is a demon's flames dimming or going out but Taylor doesn't have flames and isn't living hell so when Cass finds him covered in ice curled up and shivering in his room, she's quick to take him into her arms offering her own body heat and comfort but is at a lost on how to help or whats going on. I don't remember if the idea involved contacting nicky or not so mostlly it would be her looking ways to warm him up more with various things around the house or maybe sneaking him into a sauna in desperation when nothing in the house is hot enough..

#cookies over yonder #asks #abeinginsand talk tag

2 notes · View notes

arlemangel7 · 4 months

Text

Dealing with Valentino

He's scary by Just his appearance alone tall overwhelming charming and that almost makes it worst cause you don't want him to actually hurt you and when he's nice it feels like a trap

I dealt with him in a dream I had helped angel get away from him but in exchange for his safety It left me exposed so he used one moment when I was alone he had angels mother corner me she told me that Valentino wanted to see me i was away from Angie and I didn't want to go get him and bring him back so I had no choice but to go into this dark room it looked like an actual moths nest messy with things everywhere but you couldn't really see anything very minimal light

When I stepped in the door immediately shut behind me there wasn't any music or anything it felt like walking into a place that you new was a trap for a killer I genuinely felt like the fly caught in the web awaiting the huge spider

Then he appeared he is alot taller then he looked from far away maybe about 6 or 8 feet above me he didn't say anything just walking towards me listening to my erratic breaths only when we get to the door way of the bathroom does he say "I want you to do something for me" as he is gently touchlessly guiding me into towards the kitchen sink

Seeing the mirror, his red glowy toothy smile and remembering what he did to angel my knees crumble underneath me my whole.body trembles in fear anxious about what I believe is about to happen to me wordlessly pleading with him not to defile my body like he has done to so many before.

Him still standing removes his pink coat only to relieve him wearing a pure white suit underneath lowers himself to meet me on the floor slowing crawls to me and places a hand gently on my cheek in an attempt to sooth my shot nerves saying things like "calm down" and "I'm not going to hurt you"

This for some reason works enough to at least get me to stop vigorously shaking seeing that change he reiterates his statement again "I want you to do something" he pulls out a vile of this tan white substance he takes some out and places it on the side of the toilet I immediately rebuddle in a slightly shaky voice "coke I don't do coke" he chuckles softly and goes "I know darling it's just some cinnamon" this made me alittle more relaxed and I say "I can't snort it ill eat it but won't snort it" this time in a steadier tone he nods and backs aways enough to allow me to tend to the task

He only let's me go after I finish eating all of it, scurried off as quickly as I could to see angel he was still sleep half naked I contemplated waking him up ultimately deciding it wasn't the right time so I hid in the closet and then they got a call on the loud speaker for a new favorite dance I Immediately go scared that he would attempt to get me again from there a conversation was had about who he would get to be his new favorite angel thought it would be best for him to go back but both me and husk thought that wasn't a good idea

#random dream #hazbin hotel #first person

1 note · View note

journey-to-the-center-of-the-liz · 1 year

Text

Questions and suggestions

1. What’s your favorite way to spend a day off?

Nothing for me truly feels better than going out down town with my friends. I love downtown with all of my heart so getting to show my friends my favorite place feels so magical. I love the book store down town i need to buy more books for sure!

2. What type of music are you into?

I am into so much music which I know is a generic statement but its true if I ever had to pick a favorite genre it would likely be old female jazz music. women talking about the reality of life how sometimes ur not beautiful sometimes you just cry and chain smoke cigarettes.

3. What was the best vacation you ever took and why?

When I was in the 6th grade before i came out i had a secret girlfriend and her family was SUPER rich. she and i went to montanna and then Wyoming i got to see yellow stone and also smell all the sulfer. everycorner had an icecream shop it was also the first time I went ziplining/ tight roping which was terrifying but perfect!

4. Where’s the next place on your travel bucket list and why?

I would absolutely love to go to the JIm henson mueseum. I have always admired the whymsy of his art especially fraggle rock and dark crystal!

5. What are your hobbies, and how did you get into them?

About 2 years ago i left a toxic friend group I used to have to devote all my time to them so when I left I had so much time to pick up hobbies. I draw,scuplt, throw knives, dance, sing, crochet, read, paint, thrift, and many other things.

6. What was your favorite age growing up?

8 was the best age for me. I was very smart compared to the rest of my class back then along with that I also had my best birthday that year i asked for a mystic doll with a reverseable head and I also got a tiny donut keychain. It was perfect

7. What was the last thing you read?

Of mice and men. I havent finished it yet but holy shit it sad. I feel for Lennie very heavily i know what it feels like to be confused or to like something that ends up being something someone takes.

8. Would you say you’re more of an extrovert or an introvert?

Extrovert! my whole life everyone told me I was an introvert but I truly dont think I am. I am just an anxious extrovert.

10. What was the last TV show you binge-watched?

Beef on Netflix was so good truly and had a lot of nuance especially in the art world.

11. Are you into podcasts or do you only listen to music?

I can get down with podcasts. I love the whole concept of chatting to a stranger.

12. Do you have a favorite holiday? Why or why not?

Halloween. it's so unifying it the one day you can be anyone you want and act a way you to and not be questioned.

13. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Easy peasy pb and j. I have really bad stomach issues so I started eating blander food so i dont have to constantly take meds.pb and j can be made so differently along with that it give you everything you need!

14. Do you like going to the movies or prefer watching at home?

I love the theater its so fun to share the movie experience with strangers it makes me happpy to spend time with people.

15. What’s your go-to guilty pleasure?

Probably alittle drink. especially somthing strawberry flavored YUM!

16. How old were you when you had your first celebrity crush, and who was it?

as far back as I can remember I have had 2 celebrity crushes,beast boy from teen titans and donetello from the ninja turtles

17. What's one thing that can instantly make your day better?

Usually just a nice compliment does it for me.

18. Do you have any pet peeves?

When people make jokes about my struggles with addiction its just so uncalled for.

19. Which meal is your favorite: breakfast, lunch, or dinner?

LUNCH IT IS THE BEST

20. What song always gets you out on the dance floor?

Tainted love by softcell

21. What activity instantly calms you?

Painting its hard to be angry when you are creating art

22. Ideally, how would you spend your birthday?

Surrounded by friends and family with a big cake and lots of hugs.

23. What do you do on your commute to/from work?

Usually talk to my mom about what i am gonna do after work so i get in a good mood for the shift

24. What's your favorite season and why?

Fall its perfect and calm

25. What's the phone app you use most?

Easily pintrest!

26. Would you rather cook or order in?

Cook especially if I have company

27. What's your favorite board game?

payday!

28. How do you take your coffee?

I like all coffee alot but black coffee hits so different!

29 What's your most prized possession and why?

Probably my fnaf circus baby funko pop. my dad got her for me when i needed someone to care about the way i felt i needed that reassurance that someone cared

30. What would be the first thing you'd do if you won the lottery?

Give it to my family and friends. I feel content with how I live my life so anything I can do to help them!

31. How do you enjoy spending your alone time?

I like to draw alot but anymreo i crochet when i am alone and when im with people.

32. What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to?

I have never been to a concert sadly

33. Do you have a favorite type of exercise?

VOLLEYBALL!!!!!!!

34. What causes are you passionate about?

I am really passionate about alot I believe everyone should have equal rights i am also very passionate about drug abuse being a disease and not a crime along with safe abortion.

35. What’s your favorite content genre (horror, sci-fi, rom-com, etc.)?

Horror comedy

36. What’s an essential part of your daily routine?

I try to say high to everyone i know even vaguely so they feel validated and knowo i care idk what i would do without doing that!

37. What’s the worst gift you’ve ever received, and what did you do about it?

I am a pretty thankful person so for me atleast i feel like anything is good

38. Who or what never fails to make you laugh?

My cousin Jay THEY ARE SO FUNNY FOR NO REASON! And I love them so talking to them brightens my day!

39. Do you like group activities, or prefer doing things solo?

GROUP ACTIVITIES!

40. What's your ideal first date?

A walk around the town and then get food an tell each other everything we know about ourselves- just really have a heart to heart

41. What would your perfect day look like?

Wake up at a decent time and have donuts with my parents then go out for a while with friends and then work and then back out with friends and maybe a fair!

42. Do you collect anything?

I collect alot of random shit- clowns,crystals,hotwheels, tech decks, batman figures, fnaf figures , candels

43. What's the best gift you've ever received, and why?

The best gift I ever received was probably my huge jar jar binks animatronic i got for free at a down town toy shop.

44. What would your perfect meal look like?

Lots of veggies like a charcuterie board with fruit,veggies,cheese,meat, honey and crackers, and maybe baked beans<3

45. What's your favorite podcast?

Violating community guide lines

46. Is there one job you’d never ever do?

Honestly the only one i probably wouldnt do is be a hitman

47. What’s the first thing you do after getting home from work?

Change i hate smelling like sweat and syrup

48. Who or what inspires you in your career?

I am very inspired by small time creatives anyone who exspiriments with art.

49. How do you approach taking time off from work?

I am honest and only take off once every 3 months or so

50. What’s something an outsider wouldn’t know about your industry?

I am actually working for a mlm but our shop is a front HAHA

51. Do you have a morning routine at work? If so, what it’s like?

I work afternoon shift but the first thing I do is wash my friends put on 60s music and make a cucumber drink.

52. Are you able to work from home, and if so, do you enjoy it?

I am also a part time illustrator other than a tea bar tender and yes i absolutely love it

53. Do you get along with all your coworkers?

YES I TRULY LOVE THEM ALL

54. What’s your favorite thing about your current job?

The people they all are so kind and respectful

55. What annoys you the most about your job?

Hmm not alot honestly probably just people who yell at me but i also understand they are struggling

56. What’s the career highlight you’re most proud of?

The first book i got published it meant everything to me!

57. What type of role do you want to take on after this one?

Hmm I am not sure I just do what the world offers me!

58. Are you more of a "work to live" or a "live to work" type of person?

Live to work i want to always to enjoy everyday and just working to live would be miserable

59. Does your job make you feel happy and fulfilled? Why or why not?

YES the smiles and the nice words do it all!

60. How would your 10-year-old self react to what you do now?

She would be confused but in the end happy

61. What do you remember most about your first job?

The time i saw a lady with no teeth eat coleslaw with her hand

62. How old were you when you started working?

16 but before that I babysitted

63. What’s the worst job you’ve ever had?

Cracker Barrel waitress holy shit it was bad.

64. What originally got you interested in your current field of work?

I loved the tea we made and i drank it so much they asked if I just wanted a job HAHA

66. Have you ever had a side hustle or considered having one?

Yeah I have a few I sell art and clothes and other trinkets along with illustrating and babysitting

67. What’s the best career decision you’ve ever made?

The best career decision I ever made was speaking up I truly cant suggest anything better than takung what the world gives you and making it yours

68. What’s the worst career decision you’ve ever made?

I very often get burn out but I am working on it!

69. Do you consider yourself good at networking?

Absolutely not but thats okay!

70. What career advice would you give to your younger self?

Speak up you have valid things to say bby!

71. Do you believe in having a "five-year plan"?

Yes i think thatr considering the future is so important

72. When will you know you've "made it"?

I feel as though I already have i have family and friends and a home and thats enough

73. Are you looking forward to retiring, or do you plan to work as long as possible?

I would like to work as long as possible

74. Have you ever had imposter syndrome?

Not sure maybe just a little

75. What qualities do you look for in a boss?

caring,respectful,fun

76. Do you have a professional mentor? If not, do you want one?

I would love one but i dont have one!

77. What energizes you about your career?

The kindness and the delicious taste of the tea

79. How do you motivate yourself in your career?

I Remind myself i need money to pay for the things i love and do things to help others

80. When you started your current job, what most surprised you?

How people who are normally kind to me at school are much ruder at work.

81. How do you pick yourself back up after making a mistake at work?

I Dance a lot. If i mess something up real bad i will fix it laugh and do a little dnace

82. How do you deal with work stress?

I remind myself everything is temporary

83. What's one work-related thing you want to accomplish in the next year?

I want to host a sip and paint

84. Who has had the biggest impact on your career choice?

My mother she always helps me find new things and step out of my comfort zone

85. What does your family think of your career?

They are very proud of me

86. If you could do it all over again, would you pursue the same career? Why or why not?

I am not sure no matter what i would do i will continue to do what is offered to me

87. Does your work routine vary, or does it look the same every day/week?

It varies a lot depending on the week

88. What do you typically wear to work?

Employee teeshirt and jeans!

89. Have you ever had to relocate for work?

No not yet!

90. Would you ever relocate for work, if you were asked to?

I would do whatever I needed to do for a good job

91. Have you ever been on a cool business trip?

YES RECENTLY FOR WORK I WENT TO CHICAGO IT WAS AMAZONG

92. How do you handle career setbacks?

I take a minute to reset and get back at it

93. How much time do you spend with your family?

ALOT

94. Who do you most like spending time with and why?

I honestly enjoy spending time with just about fanyone I love hearing other peoples ideas alot!

95. Which family member makes the best food?

My parents cooking compliments each other perfectly mh father learned how to cook in a restaurant while my moms mom passed down recipes and technique to her so its amazing!

96. How has your opinion of your family changed over the years?

When i was younger i use to be dumb and be upset at my mom all the time but now i am so much closer with everyone

97. If you’re close with your family, what’s the hardest part about spending time away from them? I miss my moms laugh and my dads funny jokes when we are apart. :(

98. Do you wish you had a bigger family, or are you happy with its current size?

HOnestly i am happy with what i have but the more the merrier

99. Which family member has had the greatest impact on you?

My mother easily she is truly my rock

100. What’s your favorite story about your grandparents?

Probably the time my grandma with a broke arm tried to arm wrestle me over math homework

101. Have you ever mapped out your family tree?

YES my grandma is actually a genealogist!

102. Were you close with your family growing up?

No sadly i was not

103. Who in your family makes you feel the safest?

Probably again my mom she is so strong!

104. Do you want a family of your own?

YES SO BADLY i want to have children so i can show them true love not challenged by generations of trauma

105. If you could change your relationship with a family member, would you? If so, with whom?

My nana i would love to be closer with her but she so unkind its very hard

106. What was it like growing up as the youngest/oldest/middle/only child?

I was the youngest but was always supposed to take care of the oldest i think that might be why i get such bad burn out because i started doing things everyone in my grade did but 2 years earlier

107. What’s your favorite family memory?

Hmm i have many but last summer my family played frisbee golf and then went to dairy king

108. Do you ever wish you were raised differently?

Yes and no is parenting hard yes were situations handled badly when i was younger often yes.

109. What’s the best piece of advice a family member has given you?

Once when i was younger and much more aggressive and frustrated i stayed up to late and had a panic attack and then my sibling said stop taking everything so seriously this isnt the end

110. Do you wish you had more siblings? If so, why?

Yes and no i feel it would be nice but also i am content with one

111. Did you ever hide anything from or lie to your parents?

Yes but i dont blame them for it

112. What's your favorite way to spend time with your family?

Board games i am incredibly bad at games and it makes everyone laugh!

113. How do you show your family you love them?

Gifts hugs words treats stuff like that helping them in general

114. What’s your favorite family tradition?

Going to my grandmas on christmas

115. What's the most important holiday you spend with your family and why?

Christmas and because it just always has been i wonder when that started

116. What's something your family would be surprised to learn about you?

Probably just how bad my addiction was i dont want them to be sad or view me as sick so i don't really tell anyone

117. Which family member do you confide in most?

Hmm honestly all of my nuclear family hears it all

118. How do you deal with arguments between family members?

I apologize and ask what i can do to help them feel better/

120. What's more important: family or friends?

Both i truly cannot pick

121. Do you have any friends you would consider family?

LITTERALLY ALL OF THEM I LOVE MY FRIENDS SO MUCH

122. What physical traits do you share with your relatives?

We all have large noses lol

123. What stories did your family members tell you growing up?

My dad used to make up stories for me and my sibling about them being a ballerina and me being an animal whisperer and wed do on adventures

124. How did your parents (and/or grandparents) meet?

The city cleaning center haha

125. What makes you proud of your family?

I am proud of them for everything they do

126. What can always bring your family together?

A new marvel movie

127. Do you share a name with anyone in your family?

Sadly no but iw ish i did

128. What activities do you like to do with your family today?

I love to paint with them

129. What activities did you love to do with your family growing up?

Probably play board games again lol

1 note · View note

the-gift-of-submission · 2 years

Text

Inside a Submissives Soul

Dear Diary -

My life feels like one big struggle of a mess right now. My therapist says I'm a going through a 'burnout', not from work, from life. Something has changed in me and I can feel that I am still changing. Therapy leaves me raw, I realise that's the whole point, we are digging around at things to pick apart and as much as I've always known I've put myself second in pretty much all situations and circumstances, now its time to put myself first. Unfortunately that means I have to make people in my life aware of this and consequently it will cause them a great deal of hurt and upset. It's so damn hard, I feel selfish and guilty for the fact I am to put myself first. My therapist says the burnout could lead to a nervous breakdown if I don't take care of myself properly and give myself the time and space I need. I'm not entirely sure what time and space means.

He is aware of everything I am facing. Although things could be far worse than they are, it still heavily weighs on my shoulders and I often feel I can't cope. I'm low, anxious and numb. He offered to help with time and space, he suggested a short break away and that's what we did. He picked me up at the weekend and took me to the coast and took care of me whilst I was able to switch off. My whole life I've been taken care of but not the way he takes care of me. He gives me what I need and he also gives me what I want. I feel eternally grateful for his presence in my life. I am thankful of the very fact he chooses to be around me even with all the difficulties he is currently facing. I'd be so lost without him.

He is concerned that he may need to give me time and space for me to be able to work through things, he is concerned he is impacting on my choices, he is concerned over much of what is going on but its not him, I don't need time and space from him. If he goes away, if he leaves, I know I will just break completely. He gives me validation, acceptance, trust and honesty, he gives me what no one else does in this f***ed up world, he gives me everything I need and want. I don't need to think around him, my head stop spinning, my heart stops hurting, my soul feels at peace when I'm with him. Everything stops, everything feels good, I feel good, I feel better. I can breathe, I can rest, I can just be.

The weather was lovely whilst we were at the coast. It was peaceful, even though it was busy in the town, I was OK. We walked through the busy streets holding my hand, he treated me to a tea and cake, we walked along the pier to the very end, stopped to appreciate the view whilst chatting, the wind was strong but it was nice and walked all the way back before stopping off to grab some food shopping for our overnighter. We moved alittle further down the road, closer to a village on the edge of the town. It was quiet, it was perfect. We walked along the beach, he kept finding glass that had been tumbled over by the waves over time, I ended up doing the same with him. He said it was like a form of meditation, keeps you occupied and distracted from your own thoughts, he's not wrong. I very much enjoyed everything he had us doing. It was very much needed. Sand between my toes, him holding my hand, we talked, we laughed, even the quiet moments were a comfortable silence and they were, well, everything. We sat for a short while, again, content and peaceful in my surroundings, sometimes, life can't get much better than this. The chill picks up as the sun is on its way down to set and he prompts us to head back to the van. We had a bite to eat and talked for a while as night time kicked in before getting comfortable for bed sometime later.

Our time together wasn't about anything other than our friendship and having the time to be away from all the s**t we are battling with in our lives. I have joked previously about us being just 'friends', I think it's safe to say that is a foundation but it is not something that our relationship is limited to. There were moments of closeness, the odd kiss, lots of hugs and holding hands or my arm would link through his. I may be assuming things here but when we laid in bed, we snuggled and I'm almost convinced I can tell when he's feeling things, feeling the need to be closer in some way. His body language and breathing is a give away, the internal growl was present.

We drifted into sleep, I dosed on and off throughout the night, I was hoping I would be able to sleep fully as it's been hard to do so along with being unable to eat properly. I was comfortable nontheless. When the light from dawn came I was pretty much awake. I looked over to find him looking at me. We snuggled some more. Needing to switch sides from the 'dead arm' feeling down one side of our bodies. I moved over him and we snuggled the other way. As he spooned me I could feel his member against my butt cheeks, he was hard. I pushed back slightly to be a tease. He was just as much a tease and he knows it.

Before long he moved his free hand into my panties and started to gently rub at me. His fingers know how to hit the spot, keeping rhythm, occasionally changing things around and it felt so good, that good I immediately wanted to release. It was slow, sensual and my god it works like a charm, I can feel my insides tightening and my legs shaking. I wish I could when he tells me to, his 'cum', 'get it', his 'let go' and his count down from 5. I become so infuriated by my inability to do as he says without hesitation. I wish I knew what holds me back, it's there, it just won't release. It took me forever but he didn't quit, he kept going till I eventually came. It was a strong one, took me what felt like forever to come down, I twitch and spasm after my orgasms, my body goes through aftershocks for some time after. I rolled over to face him, he moved onto his back, he was supposed to get up but my hand had to return the favour. Gripping his member with my hand, feeling him grow between my fingers, he became rock solid rather quickly, he seemed to be enjoying it too.

'Take off your panties'. I know he means business when he says things like that. Off they came and he moved over the top of me. Reaching down between us to guide him into me, yet again, I was ready for him and yet again, I immediately wanted to climax. He has said, not in these words, that his self restraint when it comes to his release is a challenge. Apparently, I am tight. I very much take this as a compliment and I can't help but grin, it's a very smug grin knowing he has to fight to hold himself back, he is very much wanting to work on this, I think he holds out very well indeed but I have some self satisfaction there about it to say the least.

He tells me to cum, I am already there, it ripples through from where he is inside me, outwards up to my head and down to my toes. He keeps going, he never let's up and I'm never sure I can't take anymore after how intense my climax runs over me, he makes me question my ability to handle myself. Not long after he says to cum again, I respond yes, it's there, I can feel it. I am able to multiple but they often become weaker the more I do. This was just as strong as the first from when he was masturbating me and the first from him penetrating me. I fall of the edge as climaxes take over, this time it really takes over and I can't stop, as he keeps driving in and out of me, my orgasms echo through me over and over. I lost count after about 4 and I'm pretty sure it was just one continous flow and the intensity just increased and decreased as time went on. He is now ready to release and he does so, I've noticed his release set mine off too, one final big bang the intensity comes to a stop. Holding for a moment, we are covered in sweat and both wearing a satisfied smile on our faces. We have also made a mess, mainly my fault, he tells me not to worry, rolls me onto my side and he moves off to clean up. I'm quite capable of sorting it out myself but he tends to just do it and leave me to recuperate alittle, I find this incredibly sweet in how attentive he is with me at times. When he comes to clean me, the cold, whether it's expected or not catches me off guard and I always flinch, he always seems amused by this. I'll find a way to get him back one day.

After him sorting both of us out, he gets dressed and goes out for 10 minutes or so. I freshen up and get myself comfortable, I am whacked so I lay on the bed. He returns with a cup of tea and cake for breakfast, I am warmed by his gesture. Still feel quite tired, I get myself snug with his duvet, we chat for some time. Most of our meets, he knows I struggle with back pain and he often gives me a massage to relieve the ache and tension I feel pretty much all the time, I am just used to it but damn he really knows how to help it. After playing masseuse, he gives me abit of a spanking, whether he is just being generous or it is for the fact I am alittle cheeky with a foul mouth at times. If he genuinely didn't like it and told me to stop I would, so far he never has. Anyhow, my ass cheeks have a nice shade of pink I can carry around for a few hours until it settles. He doesn't like leaving marks but my skin seems to be quite sensitive.

After further attempts of trying to get me up and out of bed, I am just so content and really quite tired, I realise I need to and I will do, just not quite yet. He talks to me about experiences at the clubs he has attended over the years for a while, I love listening to him about anything he talks about. He knows I very much would like to attend a club in the future, I am just very nervous about it at present and feel I need to get myself together in a number of ways before I attend. He has said he will accompany me in whichever fashion we feel appropriate at the time so ensure my safety and aid with the guidance I will need.

I am listening to him but I can also feel something is amiss within myself. I try to contain it, I don't know what he picks up on but when he asks if I'm OK I tell him I don't know. He asks me a couple of questions about how I feel when we play, if I go fuzzy, which I do in different ways. He asks how I feel after, when he's not around, I tell him I feel abit sad but I put that down to the fact that I miss him. He suggests that I may be experiencing sub drop, I am aware of this and I try to take care of myself during these times to the best of my ability. I start to get upset, I've never allowed myself to cry infront of him before nor did I want to anytime soon, I don't want my darkness to impact his. He comes to cuddle me in bed, my tears grow, he rests his hand on my face to help me feel enclosed, a way to make me feel safe and it helps but the tears are getting worse. I feel so much upset and hurt, everything that's been going on in life rushes back into me, I have have go back to it all in a few hours, I really don't want to, I don't want my time with him to end again and I'm fighting to keep it all tucked away, I don't want him to see me at my worst. I'm unable to calm myself, he tells me to let it out but I am refusing. In the end its no use and it all floods through me, and onto him, quite literally, he needed a new tshirt. Through it all he held me close, he gave me tissues, he spoke to me. Support like this never goes amiss. This for me brings a type of strength that solidifies our relationship in whatever context it may be. I don't let anyone see my darkness like that, he's been aware of it but he's never physically seen it. He was my rock through it all. It takes a while but I calm, it eases and I begin to pick myself up enough to move forward.

It is time, yet again, to head back to reality. Takes a couple of hours and we talk through the things we are facing. He is trying to understand where I am at and remains neutral in playing 'devil's advocate', which I find ever so respectable. He has opened up to me like never before recently and I have honoured he feels he can do so, I want to support him in everyway that he does me. Eventually we arrive back to reality and after saying out thank yous and goodbye for nows with a hug and kiss, off we go to face it all again. The time away with him was beyond needed, the whole point was so I could breathe, enable myself to switch off and maybe be able to think more clearly. As much as I am dealing with what I can, much of it is about biding my time, getting on my feet to become independent and self reliant.

I hate the fact that I pine for him, it makes me feel weak and needy but at the same time that just reminds me that he means such a great deal to me. I wouldn't change what we have together for anything, I hope we grow to have something more in time but at the very least, this is and would be enough if we are to stay how we are now. I just hope I get to see him again real soon, I hate being away from him, I really do.

The weekend, even with things looming in the background, for me, it was perfect, felt special and was very much needed. I hope this is something I can do again in the near future even if it's just me jumping on a train and seeing where it takes me. Obviously the company I've had this weekend would be much nicer. To not have have think, just to be able to breathe. I am eternally grateful once again for his time and support at such a crucial time in my life. I will hold this close to me for a long time coming.

0 notes

anna1306 · 2 years

Note

I have alittle bit of an angsty/comfort kinda request the poly! Lost boys. What if one night David and s/o got into a very heated argument, over them turning, they just don't feel ready to take such a huge step yet but David keeps insisting. That it's safer and etc. Meanwhile in the background Marko, Paul and Dwayne are trying to calm the situation. Trying to calm both sides down enough to calmly talk it out when David says (or calls them something up to you) absolutely horrible causing everyone to go quite, staring at him in shock. It takes David a couple of seconds to realize what he said but before he or any of the boys can do anything, their s/o teary eyed turns and leaves the cave. They only snap out of their shock when they hear their s/O's engine, driving back to their place. How would David make up for it? What would the three other boys do?

Wrong words

Poly!Lost Boys x Reader

Marko thought that they had lived through uneasy times already. That you came to terms with them being vampires and killing people and that's pretty much it. But now he wasn't so sure that it was fine.

"Maybe we can just have civilised talk." He offered quietly, but his words weren't heard.

"I just don't see why this is such a big deal to you, you are already ours, it's a time question." Yep, he definitely wasn't heard. David still said what he wanted.

"For me it is important, I don't want to go through it now. I have friends-humans, I have a lot to do as a human. Besides I don't think I am ready to... You know... Hunt someone." You sighed, still trying to act calm, even if that was hard with how anxious and emotional David became.

"We can try and search for another way of feeding when they are ready." Dwayne tried to get through to David too. But the so-called leader was too angry at this point.

"What did you expect when you learned the truth, us getting on a diet or that everything would magically turned in your favour?!" David just couldn't understand you and his emotions were getting the best of him.

"Of course not!" You sighed almost exasperatedly. "I just need more time, David, I don't want to become a vampire now."

"Time for what?!"

"I don't... I don't know." You looked to the side, seeing Paul, nervously smiling at you. "Look, I know that you just want to make sure I'm safe, but..."

"You don't know a damn thing." David growled, stepping to you. "What did I even expect from the person who doesn't know anything."

"David, maybe you want some weed and relax..." Tried Paul, but was shut up by only one glare from the platinum blonde.

"What? What do you mean..." You furrowed your brows, not understanding his point.

"I meant what I said!" David returned his look on you. "I don't understand why you reject us all so much, and you can't even explain it. You never can explain anything, because there is no reason for it."

"David, it's enough." Dwayne tried to stop him before he said anything else, but...

"You are just stupid little kid who wants everyone else to make decisions for you. But worse than that - you are spoiled little kid. Because as soon as this is something you don't like, you are suddenly against it. How does it feel - using us?"

"David, what the hell you are talking about?" You asked almost in whisper, not believing what you heard right now from your boyfriend. "I'm not using you, how can you say that?"

"Let's see. You are hanging out with us, we pay or steal for you, solve your problems and conflicts. And you can't even change for us, to be with us!"

"I would never use you!"

"LIAR!" You shunned from him, scared by his scream and a flash of yellow eyes. "You can't make a single fucking decision, you just using us but the minute something is wrong - you are out. You are nothing. No brain behind this eyes. Just stupid, useless little kid who doesn't deserve a single thing. Who constantly whine about everything and how "mama treated them badly". But the minute we are offering the salvation - you refuse, because you only want to whine more. Useless, whiny, hysterical shit!"

He lowered the volume of his voice to the end of his tyrade. But the scream wasn't necessary anymore. You were silent, maybe too silent. Even your heartbeat slowed down. David sighed and looked at you. Only when he saw tears in your eyes, he froze. Suddenly he realised what exactly he said.

Before he could say anything else or react - you were running to the exit. In a minute there was a roar of a car engine outside, slowly getting further. The cave was silent.

"I don't say that often, David. But you are a dick." Dwayne said coldly.

"I..."

"And you call us stupid?"Marko snorted. "Look what you've done."

"I didn't mean it!" David looked at the blonde strictly. "You know that I am worried for them. And I want to be sure that they are safe and with us!"

"And still you accused them and called them names!" Paul shook his head. Dwayne went to the exit.

"Where are you going?"

"After Y/N. They need someone by their side."

"I'm with you." David moved after Dwayne, but brunette turned to him and put hand out, stopping him. David had never seen that kind of glare from Dwayne. Not directed at him at least.

"No. You need to think. And think very good about what you have done and what you are going to do and say. They don't need you there now." He answered very strictly. Paul followed Dwayne, as Marko did too. They all left David alone with his thoughts.

***

You didn't remember the road. You just drove without any stops, just to get to your house. You didn't even remember how you went to your room, you just closed up the door and collapsed on the bed. You didn't want to cry hysterically, but something in your chest was tightening up and hurting.

You always tried to be of use. Since you were a kid your mom constantly told you you weren't helping and she better do it herself, so you wouldn't ruin anything. She didn't give you a choice, she always decided for you. And now, when you finally separated from her, you wanted to decide for yourself, to live freely. It wasn't fast process, but you were trying to be more involved in your own life. You thought boys understood that.

You thought He understood that.

Apparently you were wrong. Maybe he was right... Maybe you were useless, not good and using them? They both were right? David and your mother?

You looked at the ceiling with an empty look, completely exhausted. You didn't know what to do anymore. You were so tired...

"I don't like how you feel." You looked to the side to see Dwayne. He was at your window, only crawled inside, but not daring to go further.

"It will be easier to say that you don't like me, you wouldn't miss the point." You mumbled, watching him slowly coming to you. He sighed, sitting on your bed and looking at you.

"David is a douchebag, it's not news. But what I don't want you to do - lay here and pity yourself or doubt yourself or think about yourself any less than it is."

"What if he's..."

"No 'what ifs'. David was wrong. Terribly wrong. And he regrets."

"It sure as hell didn't feel like it."

"Princex..." Dwayne sighed, putting his hand on your hair and caressing it. "He is sorry. He is impulsive and... Too afraid to lose you."

"You say that. Because you always know the right words. Because you always keep everything and everyone together. And I..." You sat and moved a bit away from him, leaning on a headboard. "Am I wrong? Should I really turn? Like... I love you all and I want to prove it, but I can't prove it enough. Maybe there is nothing for me left here and I just need to..."

"You don't need to obey us. Obey him. We can wait." Dwayne carefully said, not moving closer and giving you space.

"Obviously you can not."

"We can." You shivered, hearing sudden David's voice. You glanced at window, where he stood, Paul and Marko behind it, in the air. These shits didn't care for neighbours who could see them. "We need to talk."

"I thought you made yourself very clear." You mumbled gloomily. David moved to the bed, but you didn't react to it, looking away. You didn't know what else you had to say in this.

"I am worried, yes. I want you to be with us forever, yes. I don't want to take a chance of something happening to you in day, yes. But i chose the wrong words and let emotions take the worst of me." David slowly took your hand. Even if you still refused to look at him, your heart shuddered. "Kitten, I can wait. I just want to be sure that you will be okay and won't leave us."

"I would never, you know that! How many more times should I prove myself?!" You looked at him almost angrily. David was silent for a minute and kissed your wrist.

"You proved yourself enough. Now let me prove myself. I was rude and a bit... Angry. So I invite you to spend a night with me. Only you and me. To talk, to relax. Your favourite food, places, you name it. Let me make it up to you." You looked at him. He was sincere, you could be sure of it, but still. His words while weren't offensive in general, were offensive to you. And he knew that it would hurt you deeply. One date night couldn't simply erase your feelings and make everything better.

"I want you to understand me and my point of view. My opinion. I am alive person, I am not a pet that is going to blindly follow you and listen!" You exclaimed, at which David sighed and nodded, lowering his gaze on your hands, locked together.

"I promise I will. Will you accept me and my offer at a date night?" You looked at him closely and sighed. It definitely was the time to make your own decisions.

"Yes. But! Without any of your powers. Normal night. Without hypnosis on shop owners and waiters. Without powers and flights. Deal?" David froze for a moment, but smiled.

"For you - anything." You smiled weakly back, when you heard cooing from the window. For a hot minute you forgot you weren't alone there.

"David, how romantic! I didn't know you had that in you!" Paul grinned, closing window behind him. His hands were full of snacks, while Marko held drinks. You guessed that was the reason why they were the last one at your house.

"One more word, and you are going to sleep at the attic alone." David warned pouting Paul and winked at you, making you giggle. Maybe you would really figure it out.

The Lost Boys Taglist: @minafromasgard @starmullet @iloveslasher @twistedharper @ichorixm @promptsforstuff @collieflower215

#tlb #thelostboys #thelostboys1987 #tlb1987 #david tlb #marko tlb #paul tlb #tlb dwayne #poly lost boys #poly lost boys x reader #lost boys x reader #the lost boys imagine #tlb imagine #x reader #reader insert #gender neutral

600 notes · View notes

yutadori · 4 years

Text

aaa i think i have to go to my chiro again a lot sooner than i expected ;---;

#aaaa #so soon... mayb fri bc thats when my brothers off work but i also feel bad botherinf him on his day off )):#going out again so soon makes me alittle anxious but ah #my back was fine for a bit today before it started hurting again ?? i didnt expect it to happen so soon....#and its hurting in a similar way.... hm maybe i should let my chiro know next time... ah ):#i hope this doesnt mean anything bad.... he did say i was feeling rlly stiff today sjsjsjs #mayb i just . need more frequent visits for a bit before it goes back to 'normal'? esp bc i didnt go for 2 months #ah ... ):#sun texts

0 notes

kiribaku-queen · 3 years

Note

Hiii congratulation for 1000 followers! U deserve it! So i was thinking of bakugou!prohero a reader where he's always busy and always hv this photoshoot with these hot models or hot pro hero that made reader feel left out. And the last straw was when a newly magazine publish of him kissing other girls cheek (or mouth) (u do u;)) and thats when they had a bad fight that caused reader to run away. I would like it to be heavy angst with a happy ending. I love angst but after a heavy angst i like a happy ending to soothe my heart 😂 if u do choose this, gudluck!

Blinded by the Fame

Angst

Pairing: Bakugou x reader

Word Count: 3.5K

A/N: Thank you so so much for this request! I was actually so excited to do this piece because I already had an idea I wanted to use and this scenario was PERFECTO~! So painful yet so good!

Thank you for the congratulations and I hope this request met your needs! Please let me know your thoughts!

Who said dating an upcoming hero was going to be easy? It certainly wasn’t easy, not in the slightest. You definitely had hard days. There were times when it got so difficult that you wanted to quit. But was loving the hero worth it and fulfilling? Absolutely.

Bakugou Katsuki was the love of your life. Relationships were never easy. Couples always have obstacles and challenges they have to overcome. Even when you were in tears, screaming at each other at the top of your lungs, even if you gave each other the cold shoulder the entire week, nothing could replace the warmth that was Bakugou’s arms. You would never much refuse his touch every tine, but that wouldn’t stop Bakugou from having you in his arms every night, whispering sweet nothings in your ears despite all the things he said prior. And you would forgive him. Of course you would. How could you not?

But being with a rising hero came with bearing a lot of burden that you had to keep to yourself. You didn’t like how he was working all the time. You didn’t like how he came home bruised up, sometimes not even going to the hospital if it means not being able to see you for the night. You couldn’t bare seeing him like that. But that was part of his job and that was never going to change. So no matter how much you absolutely hated the sight, you let him do his hero work because that was what he loved to do. You couldn’t interfere with his dreams of becoming the number one hero.

But the thing that itched you the most was when Bakugou was forced to promotional shoots to get his name out there. The memory of when he first started made you laugh. Being the Bakugou that he was, he flat-out refused to do it. He didn’t like getting his picture taken. He’ll dress up once in a while, and when he does it’s real clean, but he wasn’t a fan of constantly dressing up. But when he finally let go and tried it once, he saw how much fan votes and popularity he was getting and eventually, would do more here and there.

And you didn’t mind if the shoots were by himself, but most of the time, they were with other pro-heroes or very attractive models. And that you feel insecure. How could it not? Your boyfriend getting close to other women while you looked nothing like these women? You didn’t have the body, the face, the money, or the fame these women brought to the table. You would never admit it, but you hated when other women were in the picture. And you hated when one of the women would be touching him. It left a sickening feeling in the pit of your stomach. You were so sure that he was going to leave you for one of them. But he proved his love by dropping down on one knee with the most gorgeous ring.

“Come with me to the shoot,” Bakugou proposed but you hesitated.

“I can just meet you at the restaurant,” you decided. The mention of being on set for one of his photoshoots seemed like a bad idea.

“I want to go together. It won’t even take long. One hour tops,” he swore and brought you by the waist, your body flushed against him. He takes your face in his hands and gently puts your foreheads together.

“I know you’ve been wanting to go to this restaurant forever. Let’s go together,” he whispers and you couldn’t help but fall for that voice over and over again.

“Okay,” you whispered back. He smiles at you, places a small kiss to your forehead, then your lips, before taking your hand to lead you to the car.

The set of the shoot was intimidating. People were running around everywhere, cameras were set in all positions, lights were blinding and hot, the space just looked so busy. And you felt like you didn’t belong. But Bakugou was so used to this kind of scene. He leads you to where the photographer and the director were talking.

“Ah, Pro-Hero Dynamite, you made it!” the director greeted your boyfriend. “Your stylist is in the next room. Go ahead and get changed and we’ll get started.” Bakugou nodded and turned to you.

“I’ll be right back,” Bakugou said and kissed you on the forehead. You watched as your boyfriend disappeared in the sea of people and then you were left all alone.

This was fine. You would just wait in the back patiently for him to be done. And then you two could enjoy a nice evening out at that fancy restaurant you’ve always been wanting to try. Just relax. You closed your eyes and took deep, but slow breaths. There was nothing to get worked up over. Afterall, it looked like Bakugou was doing this shoot by himself.

But you spoke too soon. Bakugou had appeared from the dressing room, looking all dashing and handsome. You felt your heart skip again. He was wearing a red shirt that was unbuttoned to the third button, exposing his broad and muscular chest. Over, he wore a black jacket with leather gloves and pants. His hair was styled slightly back, forehead showing. He was mesmerizing to look at. But shortly after his appearance, two women walked out behind him. Two gorgeous, fit, and slim women who wore skin tight, elegant dresses were doing the shoot with him. And for some reason, your heart began to hurt. The pang in your heart was constant that you had to beat at your chest to calm yourself down.

They were beautiful. And you had recognized one of the women: Pro-hero Miruko. You knew their history together. Bakugou had worked under Miruko during his school days and eventually worked along side with her after he graduated. You knew she was a flirt. She flirted with everybody. And that was fine, until she got alittle too touchy with your boyfriend. And that bothered you. But Bakugou was so used to her behavior that he didn’t even notice.

You couldn’t say anything. They are old time friends and co-workers. What? Are you supposed to say that he can’t be friends with her anymore just because you didn’t like it? And then you would look like the possessive girlfriend? You were fine with him being friends with other women, but they did make you nervous. Nervous because all the women he’s surrounded by are so unbelievably good looking, it put you to shame. Why would he want to be with you when he could have all these women to choose from?

But you tried to shake these negative thoughts away and playfully tugged at the ring on your ringer. There was a reason why he chose you. There was a reason why he gave you this ring. You shouldn’t think this way. But you couldn’t help it. You tried not to let it bother you, but in the end, it did. It really did. It bothered you so much that you couldn’t stop fidgeting.

You watched at Bakugou sat on the couch with both women on each side of him. His arms were lounging on the back of the couch while one girl sat next to him and Miruko stood behind him. Looking at his facial expressions, he didn’t seem interested in any of the girls. Which is a good sign?

And so the shoot started. Nothing else could be heard besides music playing in the background and the loud click of the camera. Everyone else was watching the shoot take place. Everything looked okay so far. Their outfits were scandalous but nothing scandalous was happening. The only directions the models were given was to look sexily at the camera. Bakugou delivered that perfectly with his go-to signature look. But now the photographer wanted more.

“Can the two women get a little closer, please?” the photographer asked and put his camera up to his face once more. The girls did what they were told and Bakugou didn’t even flinch. But you were growing nervous. There was more skin happening, more touching and it was making you uncomfortable. You gasped when you saw Miruko grab Bakugou by his chin to lift to towards her direction. Then she leans in, her lips ghosting over his ever so slightly, like they were about to kiss. Tears were spilling out and your cheeks heated up in anger until you finally exploded.

“Stop!” you yelled, stopping all production. Heads from all around turned to you. Mirko looked at you shocked and Bakugou was wide eyed with curiosity and concern. You gripped the handle of the purse that was slung around your shoulder, feeling anxious now that everyone was looking at you.

“Sorry, give me one moment,” Bakugou apologized to the staff. He got up, rushing towards you. He takes your hand and brings you in the dressing room. The door slammed shut and Bakugou turns to you in a huff.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he hissed. With tears streaming down your face, you were shocked by his reaction. But you were going to stand your ground.

“I don’t like how she was touching you,” you say.

“It’s my job,” he sighs in exasperation.

“Well she should learn her boundaries, whether it’s a job or not. And if you respected me at all, you would tell her no,” you stated firmly. But all Bakugou did was roll his eyes.

“You’re overreacting.” You scoff and it was your turn to roll your eyes.

“Oh, I’m overreacting? Is it wrong that I don’t like when other women are touching you?” you started to raise your voice and talk back.

“Do I have to say it again? It’s my job. If I’m going to make it big, I have to do it. What? You think I like her? You think I was going to let her kiss me? It’s just for the pictures. Geez, how sensitive can you get?” he stabbed you right in a sensitive topic. You stayed silent because you weren’t expecting him to say that. The moment you think he’s going to stop there, he keeps going.

“I might need to save lots of women who are in danger. What? You don’t want me touching them? You’re going to get jealous because I’ll have some stranger in my arms? You’re afraid that she’s going to cling to me for dear life because I’m saving her? You don’t like that?!” he was practically screaming now.

“No! I don’t like that!” you screamed right back, giving back the same amount of energy. The tension in the air was so thick, anyone could feel it. Hell, they were all listening from outside and they felt uncomfortable with the ambiance of the situation. Both parties’ chests were heaving up and down from the labored breathing. And you just glared at each other. Bakugou turns away from you, breaking the ice.

“Fine. If you’re going to be this jealous, then maybe… maybe we shouldn’t be together,” he said. That was it. That was when your heart broke into a million pieces. You felt like if you stood there any longer, you would have suffocated.

“Fine,” you whisper. He doesn’t even spare you a glance. With teary eyes and a heavy heart, you tighten your jaw as you take off your engagement ring, wiggling it off your finger and then setting it down on the counter beside you. The sound of the metal hitting the hard desk was loud enough for Bakugou to hear, but he still chose not to turn to you. You thought that maybe, just maybe, if he turned around and said he didn’t mean it, then you would have been okay. You would have forgave him for those mean things he said. And then you would have apologized to him. But he looked set on his decision.

Without another word, you turned around and sped out of that building, tears never stopping. Everyone saw you go. Miruko laid her sad eyes on you and her broke for you. Shortly after, Bakugou walks back to the couch, plopping down with a huff.

“Let’s continue,” he says begrudgingly. But nobody moves, still shell-shocked about yousr argument. But this causes Bakugou to explode.

“Are you not going to start? Let’s get on with it!!” he hollers and everyone rushes like mice to get back to production. Bakugou lets out a long sigh, face in a permanent frown.

Miruko sits on the back of the couch and looks down at her old friend. She could tell that he was hurting just as much as you, if not more.

“Idiot~” Miruko sang.

“Ha?” Bakugou glared up at his past mentor. Mirko looked at her nails, not paying mind to the hot head who was on the verge of exploding.

“You need to go apologize,” she told him, more like ordered him to.

“Like it’s my fault.”

“You didn’t take her feelings into consideration,” Miruko pointed out, silencing Bakugou on the spot. “If she was feeling a little jealous, then her feelings are totally valid. You need to do something about it and make her feel like she doesn’t need to worry about anything.” Bakugou was only getting more annoyed.

“Whatever. It’s just business. If she can’t understand that, then we don’t need to be together,” he tried to convince himself. But that only hurt himself more.

“Whatever my ass. Then if you can’t be a good boyfriend and comfort her instead of making her feel insecure, then she doesn’t need you. She can find a better man who treats her good.”

“I do treat her good,” Right?

“Oh yes, I can tell,” Miruko said sarcastically. But in all seriousness, she knew he was hurting and she was trying to give advice from a woman’s perspective, but he is so stubborn and hard-headed that he doesn’t want to admit that he was in the wrong.

“Look, you let her go home like that right now, you’re not going to get her back. Go after her,” she advices on a serious note. Bakugou takes a moment to think but it’s all too much. He ruffles his hair and shoots up from the couch.

“Fuck this shit. I’m not doing this anymore,” he announces and storms out of the building. But not before shoving the metal jewelry in his pant pocket.

You didn’t know where you were going. You just walked and walked until you wind up somewhere. And god, you were so hungry. But you couldn’t go to that fancy restaurant that Bakugou had already made reservations for. God forbid he walks in while you were eating. And with another woman? How embarrassing. You couldn’t use his name or his fame anymore. You didn’t want to go back home. What if he shows up at your place? It probably wasn’t likely. He said he was done with you. You left the ring back with him. You guys were over. He wouldn’t show up uninvited. He has no reason to. You didn’t have money on you. You didn’t have any mode of transportation. The only think you had was your phone but the battery can only last so long. So you continued on walking until you hit a park and sat down on one of the benches. You were left alone to bathe in your thoughts until the set sun.

“Where the fuck did she go?” Bakugou mumbled to himself. He checked all the alleyways, in between streets, high and low, but he couldn’t spot you. No matter how he was frustrated he was feeling, he started to get nervous. He wondered if you were okay and safe right now. You hadn’t eaten all day. Wait. There’s no way…

“Hi. Reservation for 2. Under Bakugou,” Bakugou told the hostess. He arrived at the restaurant, in hopes that you came in. But when the hostess said that you hadn’t shown up, his shoulders deflated. Back to square one. So if you weren’t here, then where were you? Had you eaten yet?

Trying his luck, he went to your apartment, but after many attempts, you didn’t open the door. You could either by ignoring him or you weren’t home yet. Knowing you, you probably weren’t home. Then he was going to wait until you came home. Taking a seat next to your door, Bakugou waited. And he was going to wait until he could see your face.

You watched as happy couples and families walked by you, having the time of their lives. You smiled sadly seeing all their smiles and laughter. How you wish you could be like that. But now you don’t even know if or when that was going to be possible. That was all you wanted. Was to be happy. You didn’t want to be in this rabbit hole of sadness. You didn’t want anybody to pity you just because you were crying. But you did long for somebody to listen to you. For somebody to tell you that it was going to be okay and that you are loved. Love… You wanted someone to love you. He just wasn’t the one for you. Then who is? Will you ever find it? Was this your only chance and you ruined it all just because you couldn’t help but feel jealous?

Stupid.

Stupid (y/n).

You always ruin everything in your life. The one time you got something good, it’s gone in an instant. You knew it was too good to be true. But there’s no going back now. It already happened and now you have to move on.

By the time you noticed, the sun had already set and darkness fell upon you. You wanted to stay longer. You debated whether or not you were going to sleep on the park bench. But after recalling new articles of kidnappings happening around the country recently, you decided to go home.

It took you a while to go home. You walked as slow as you could, taking your sweet time returning back to your apartment. All you want to do is snuggle up in bed and go to sleep. You were so exhausted. Mentally, physically and emotionally. You just needed some rest and then you can worry more in the morning. You were coming up to your apartment and saw a person sitting on the floor what looked like in front of your apartment door. No. But there’s no way.

Blonde hair.

That was all it took for you to turn back, go down those stairs and back to the park. You couldn’t face him right now. You were already broken up so why was he there? He said all he needed to say so why was he there?

You thought you were being sneaky but Bakugou caught you. He saw you going back down those stairs and he immediately got up and chased after you.

“(y/n)!” he called out to you but you ignored him. The sound of his voice made your heart clench.

“(y/n)!” he called again, but louder. Again, you continued to ignore him.

“(y/n)!” he called for the last time, this time grabbing your arm. But you shook him as fast as he grabbed you.

“No, leave me alone,” you managed to say. Just keep on walking. Maybe if you walk long and far enough, he’ll give up. But he wasn’t giving up.

“(y/n), stop!” he grabbed you again, yet this time tighter so you couldn’t escape. Then he traps you in between him and the wall, forcing you to face him.

“Stop! Let me go! Leave me alone!” you cry. Your tear stained face and puffy eyes broke Bakugou’s heart. He did this to you. Fuck. He was the worst. You thrashed around, forcing him to let go, hitting him to push him away. Anything so he could get away from you.

Bakugou let you hit him. He deserved it. Every hit that you take at him, he deserved. Slowly but surely, he pulled you in for a hug. You were so drained that you let him. And as soon as you were in his embrace and your cheek hit his chest, you cried. You let it all out and didn’t stop. Bakugou didn’t say anything. He just held you, patting your head until you calmed down.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. He kissed the top of your head and rested his head there. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He continued to say. Your cries were muffled by being buried in his chest.

You held onto him tight, continuing to cry your heart out. You thought you were never going to see him again. You thought you were never going to hold him again. Or smell him. You world was crashing down on you but was slowly being put together again.

“Do you want to go inside?” he asks you softly. Your voice was too hoarse and sore from all the crying, so you nodded your head, not letting go of him. Bakugou got the hint and picked you up princess style and led you into the house. There was going to be a lot of talking happening soon in that tiny apartment. It was going to be a long night.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #bnha bakugou #mha bakugou #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bakugou imagine #bnha imagine #bakugou angst #1000+ follower event

491 notes · View notes

fallout-drabbles-n-stuff · 3 years

Note

abshwvshsh imagine Paladin Danse with Baby Fever.

Got alittle drabble?

*I got like an idea where Paladin Danse and Alex(fallout oc) go on a mission and end up finding an orphan baby and as Alex is taking care of it, Paladin Danse is like 😍😍🤩🤩. So yea lol.*

(I totally deviated from the prompt but I was hoping this would be satisfactory as well? 😅 if not, I'm more than happy to write for the original prompt, just send me another ask)

Perhaps this feeling was simply a product of the desertion he felt after exile.

You were so very kind to him. You were there for him when he had hit the lowest point fathomable, when his life as he knew it was ripped away from him and left him with this deep melancholic emptiness. It took time, of course, but like always- you were patient with him, truly there for him.

If asked, Danse wouldn't know exactly how you did it, but piece after piece you managed to put back together what he once felt was broken beyond repair. Maybe it was the way you valiantly fought to reassure his life's value, maybe it was the long days you spent at his side so he may not feel lonesome, but most likely it was the love you professed that let him know that if someone as wonderful as you could have such profound feelings for something like him...then yes, maybe he was truly worth more than he believed.

Nonetheless, there were still some times that Danse would sit in your cozy little home, a far off look in his eyes as he thought deeply about something you just couldn't quite put your finger on. Once, you would've been able to just look at him and know what troubled him- a trait he didn't care for in the slightest- but lately...he wasn't quite as easy to read.

His identity would forever be something he struggled with no matter how much progress the two of you made, this you knew and understood, but whatever was on his mind as of recent didn't seem to have the same effect. For instance, these moments you'd catch him in..he wouldn't look nearly as tense, which may be a fruitless observation to note- but hey, every little detail meant something with Danse. In addition to this, the proud ex-paladin would usually seek your comfort if his mind raced to such dark places and now he would only sit in silence.

Instead you were left puzzled, watching the man you love sit and continue on with his mental strife- only moving every so often to fidget with the glistening metallic band on his left ring finger.

You never would've guessed that the reason he was so deep in though stemmed from the child sitting on your kitchen counter, eating one of Danse's prized snack cakes with Shaun. The child happened to be one of the settler's kids, a little girl around six years of age- so far too young to help out in the farm, and too young to leave unattended..so naturally, with you being the bleeding heart you are, you agreed to help out the girl's parents and watch her every so often while they worked. Besides, after your marriage to Danse..and Shaun coming home, there wasn't very much adventuring going on anymore. It wasn't a big deal though, Shaun rather liked having company (even if he preferred hanging out with Duncan more) and having a younger child around didn't bother you in the slightest.

Unbeknownst to you, watching the way you cared for the two children really struck a nerve within Danse. It was almost enchanting to watch you fuss after them, leading his mind to wander off to the most fantastical places.

"Okay, Shaun, do you think you can handle taking her back home? Her ma and pa should be finished working out in the field by now. I'll send Dogmeat with you." You spoke, receiving a rather exasperated expression from your little boy as he gracelessly slid off the counter, feet landing with a soft *thud*.

He proceeded to hold a hand out to his much shorter, younger friend to help her down. "No problem mom..." He all but grumbled as he began to lead her out the side door. A blur of brown and black fur at your feet let you know your faithful companion was at attention and ready to escort the two children- a happy bark followed by the closing of the door eased your mind shortly thereafter.

Had it been anywhere else, you probably wouldn't have let Shaun leave without you or Danse..but given that the girl's parents lived two doors down- you didn't really worry. However, you DID worry about the ex-paladin.

With a casual sigh, you sauntered your way into the living room- only a little surprised when you realized your entrance hadn't done much to catch his attention. Regardless, you pushed on and decided to sit right beside him- smiling just the slightest bit whenever his gaze finally shifted away from his wedding band and to you instead.

"Alright." You began, making no qualms about scotching closer over to him until he instinctively wrapped an arm around your shoulder. "What's eating at you?" You simply prodded, head resting on his chest.

Danse visibly stiffened, as though under the impression that his silence went unnoticed. He couldn't have been more wrong- he knew better than to think anything would get passed you. Even if it had, the thrumming of his synthetic heart against your ear surely gave him away.

Before he dignified your question with a response, he shifted around so that he could properly face you- still holding you yet able to move his head in such a way that he might be able to see the way you'd react completely to what his next words were going to be. And…maybe to get your attention away from the heavy beating in his chest.

That's really when you noticed it. The fleeting look in his eyes, the unsteadiness of his breath, the slight pink shade decorating his nose and cheeks..Danse was nervous.

"This..I apologize but this going to seem completely out of the blue.." He finally spoke, sighing as he closed his eyes just for a brief moment- trying to collect himself so that his nerves might not get the best of him. This is a matter that he had been wrestling with for some time now, the last thing he wanted was to get so anxious that he couldn't speak.

Alas, calming down seemed to only get harder for him. True, it had only been a few seconds since he spoke but the way you looked at him, so concerned and so..sweet, made time slow down and his damned heart incomprehensibly race.

"Whatever it is Danse, I've got you.." Great- now that concern he picked up on was lacing your voice as well.

Was it truly necessary for him to complicate things to such extremes? It's not like the topic was completely alien to either one of you..and damnit, you're the one person he felt he could speak his mind freely to..so why wasn't this any easier?

Then came the words you never, ever, ever, would've expected to hear from his mouth.

With his eyes soft, and his voice even more so, Danse spoke. "I know we have Shaun, and don't get me wrong- I truly do love the boy as a son, my son...but have you ever considered what having a child of our own would be like?" It was in that instant that Danse realized how abrupt his words may have came out, that tender gaze of his slowly retreating to look anywhere but you. "Forgive me, it's um..it's selfish of me to anticipate you being ready for such a thing, especially considering what we have both went through this past year.."

Unable to focus on much else but the drumming noise inside your head from the profound beat of your heart, your trembling hands grabbed at his and squeezed.

"You know..you have a bad habit of cutting me off before I can tell you what I think, sir." You laughed, trying to distract from the tears threatening to well up. Sure, it may have been a slight over reaction but..with Danse wanting a family..it was one hell of a step in a good direction. "What happened in the past..well, it should stay there. The two of us have something most people never get, we have the ability to start anew and leave our troubles behind us, Danse. So...god, I don't think much else would make me happier than having a baby with you.."

Once the ex-Paladin got over the initial shock of your words, he all but mauled you in a breath-stealing kiss- his arms wrapping tightly around you to the point of making the promise of breath a distant memory. Nonetheless, you couldn't help but enthusiastically kiss the man back...at least until-

"MOM! Gross!!" Shaun shrieked, having opened the door at quite possibly the least opportune time. Great.

Danse pulled back with a shameful blush on his face, averting his eyes from the young boy who was now fake gagging as he walked off to his room.

“Guess we oughta see if Mac is up for letting Shaun stay over with Duncan..hm? You know, just to get a head start..” to this, the ex-paladin’s adorable blush deepened tenfold.

Fantastic....or rather...outstanding.

#so this was no small drabble #ayyyyy #I love him so much #fallout 4 #fallout #paladin danse #paladin danse x sosu #paladin danse x reader #Danse

173 notes · View notes

toosweetfiddlesticks · 3 years

Note

Can I request something with Mirio Togata x male intimidating reader? So like the reader is really tall and scary looking but is a totally sweetheart when you actually talk to him. So even Mirio was a little wary at first but as soon as they actually talk he immediately falls for him.

Paring: Mirio x Male! Intimidating! reader

Summary: Mirio’s usual friendly demeanor was tarnish by the freakishly tall y/n. He always seem to be a bit solemn and cold. But, with just one little introduction, Y/N’s sweet and warm personality caught Mirio by surprise and his heart.

Side note: tysm for the request, I really appreciate it! 💕

————————————

Mirio’s eyes hastily glanced away from the lingering and spine-chilling stare of Y/N. Now, Mirio wasn’t the type to hesitate in social interactions. His many classmates could agree that he had a bright and sunny personality. He could talk to the most awkward, weirdest, grumpiest person in the world and crack at least a smile on their face. He was friendly and socialized with everyone.

But when Y/N came into the classroom, Mirio would feel a bit daunted from his mere presence.

He almost resembled a giant, towering over all his other classmates and colleagues. And his face was devoided of humor. Mirio would say he’s was quite dignifying, if it weren’t for the chilling stare he gave people almost if not all the time. But besides the chilling eerie expression, Mirio would have to admit that Y/N was a good looking guy. Y/N has stolen a couple of Mirio’s glances, peeks, or stares. He just seemed a little...ya know, scary.

Once class was over, Mirio caught another peek of Y/N once again before focusing back on packing his bag once Y/N glanced his way. Mirio hummed a little as the quick taps of Nejire’s shoes and the dragging feet of Tamaki came towards him. Nejire’s long light blue hair pushing and rubbing around the anxious boy’s flustered cheeks and eye. A broad smile wore on her face.

“Mirio!” She waved a hand towards Mirio, catching his attention. His face had the iconic Mirio smile painted all over it as Tamaki struggled to pull Nejire’s hair out of his face. He felt his cheeks burn from embarrassment as people were already staring at the two cause of her call towards Mirio. “You doing anything today?” Nejire asked. Mirio rubbed his thumb and pointer finger against his chin in thought. Besides some studying, he’s schedule for the complete day was empty.

“Nothing besides studying to night.” Nejire smiled and clapped her hands together at Mirio’s reply. The two completely ignoring the still struggling Tamaki.

“Great!” She cheered, “Y/N-” Tamaki, who was able to swim and free himself from the sea of Nejire’s hair, cut Nejire off before she could finish. He eyes staring intensely at the enormous student leaning on the wall through window.

“Is scary.” Tamaki remarks, making Mirio nod in agreement.

“No silly!” Tamaki winced at the loud laugh that bubbled up in Nejire’s voice. “Wanted to know if he could hangout with us today at the mall.” She explained, “He’s been really wanting to talk to you guys.” The boys reaction made it seem like she was talking about cannibalism. Their eyes nearly bludged out of their skulls, earning a small look of puzzlement at the two.

Y/N, the guy that gives the most deadliest death stares...Wanted to hang out with us?

“Come on guys, he’s super nice once you give him a chance.” Mirio internally questioned her statement. Super nice? Maybe he was being a little too judgmental. “Mirio, you always love meeting new people.” Mirio couldn’t argue with that.

“You do have a point.” Tamaki concerningly stares at Mirio and worries at his words. But no matter how much he wanted to protest, the two had their minds made up. He mumbled a few words along the lines of agreement, his hand clinching the arm of his other.

“As long as he is as nice as you say..” Mirio heard mutttered under Tamaki’s breath. Seconded that.

———————-

Nejire cheerfully hopped along to Y/N with the other two weary behind her. Y/N’s back leaned on the exposed brick wall, his expression the usual blankness besides the cold stare he was giving his phone. As the other two behind her were a bit confused on why Y/N was giving his phone the death stare, Nejire swung her hands high in air as the reached him closer, catching his attention. She chirped up, yelling his name with a smile.

“Y/N!” she yelled. While Nejire jogged over to Y/N, Tamaki and Mirio’s pace only seemed to increase by alittle. A shiver were crawling down both of their spines. Wow, how is he able to be leaning against a wall look intimidating, pretty impressive, scary, but impressive.

The more they got closer, the more of the sense of anxiousness snaked around Mirio. He looked at Nejire, she was excited to see him. And she really wanted them to meet Y/N. It would be mean to hurt Nejire’s feelings Mirio swallowed his anxiety.

With a determined look in his eyes, Mirio began to walk more proudly and with confidence. Ok then!, Mirio internally exclaimed, Y/N’s a nice guy, and wants to be friends. It’s time to make a friend.

Mirio gave his most friendliest smile and locked eyes with the taller boy. But unlike the intimidating stern Y/N usually give people, his eyes enlighten with a spark of surprise and happiness just like the rest of his face. It seemed so much brighter than his usual blank expression. Did Mirio see a look of... excitement? Y/N cheeks rised like the sun, his smile being even brighter. With a small laugh, he broke eye contact to hug Nejire and a shocked Tamaki.

“Hi! I hope I didn’t ruin any plans for you guys or anything.” He spoke with cheerfulness. “I don’t really have many friends and you guys seemed friendly.” Nejire waved him off and gave his cheek a soft pinch with a smile as his scratched the back of his head. He turns his attention back to Mirio again, “Hug?” Mirio’s felt a sense of a indescribable feeling in his chest.

“Of course!” Mirio replied. There as no longer a feeling of weary or hesitation, expect embracement. The feeling of Y/N’s hands closing in around Mirio’s shoulders was, warm and soft. His breathing was slow and he squeeze tight, embracing Mirio as much as he could. The feeling was like hugging a big soft teddy bear.

Woah

Y/N and Mirio thought. Mirio’s smile was so sweet and his ocean blue eyes were as deep as the seas. He’s touch opened a cage of buttflies in Y/N stomach, swirling around up to his heart

Y/N’s warm touch made Mirio’s heart jump in excitement. His smile shined as bright at the other.Their touches to on another, felt like electricity on each other skins. Their hug lasted longer than it should have, but it didn’t bother each other. (But Nejire and Tamaki was lowkey confused)

Y/N finally let go, with a feeling of warmth on his cheeks.

“They have ice cream that’s really good.” He words were almost fumbled, “Wanna go get some guys, I can pay if you want!”

———————

“You sure you don’t want me to drop you two off?” Y/N concernly ask. Him and Mirio sitting on the sidewalk, finishing up their second ice cream of the day. With bags of clothing in one hand and Tamaki’s hand in another, Neijire waved Y/N’s concerned look.

“Don’t worry.” Her brigths reassurance calmed Y/N worries down a little. “Tamaki and I live close together anyway!” And with that, Tamaki and Nejire began to walk away, Nejire skipping happily off with Takami being pulled along. She waved at them with her bag filled hand once again before skipping away. “Bye!”

“Bye!” Comfortable silence consumed the two boys after waving to Nejire back.

As the sun began to slowly creep away, Mirio’s eyes casually examined his friend. Even now he was surprised at how open and friendly Y/N is. He guessed he never noticed Y/N bright e/c (eye color) eyes with that soft look in it. It always seemed to be so intimidating from far away. Either way, the intimidation is in the past and he’s happy to say that Y/N was his friend now.

Once the sun was completely gone, the boys were about to go separate ways...

Until

“Y’know,” Y/N spoke, “I was always kinda of intimidated by you.” Y/N looked back to see Mirio’s widened eyes with honest ones. His hands shoved down into his pocket as Mirio looked at home with puzzlement. His eyebrows furrowed and his eyes squinted, wondering if he was serious.

“Really?” As mirio approached closer to Y/N again, Y/N in confirmation.

“Yep.” Y/N answered. Sighs left his mouth as he looked at the now appearing stars. He watched them sparkle and gleam back down at him. “You’re strong and you have such a powerful quirk.” He continued. “On top of that, you were always so kind to people. I guess you can say I was kinda jealous of you and the people around you.” He looked back down at Mirio, his head tilted at the h/c (hair color) boy.

“Jealous?” He asked. ”Why jealous?” Y/N approached Mirio closer as he continued, “I mean you have any amazing quirk yourself?” He countered but was only left with a chuckle.

“I wasn’t jealous of your quirk.” Y/N replied, “I was jealous of the people that got to see your beautiful smile, Mirio.”

Y/N smirked at Mirio slowly began to notice how close they were. His high cheeks were began to pour with pink, and his face began to warm. Y/N’s chest filled with a feeling of fuzzy warmness as their noses seemed to almost touch. Their eyes were glued on each other’s lips.

“Y/N..” Mirio slowly said. “Can...” Y/N’s nostrils flared as Mirio inhaled. He mentally prepared himself for this, “can I kiss you?”

Silence engulfed each other. The stars watched the two stand in the thick air of tension. Y/N almost couldn’t even find the words he was looking for cause of excitement. Passionately, he spoke.

“...yes.”

729 notes · View notes

arbustorum · 2 years

Note

I'm a lesbian and have a crush on my straight best friend. I wanna tell her I like her without ruining our friendship. I think I'll just say "oh by the way I like you, just thought you ought to know". But as a straight woman, if your lesbian bestie had a crush on you how would you want her to tell you in a way that isn't weird?

This actually did happen to me with a bisexual friend of mine!

Unfortunately I had already figured out that she liked me so its hard for me to guess how your friend might react in the moment compared to how I did, but maybe sharing what went on in my head can help you make decisions.

I'm 31 now and this happened when I was in high school, my best friend since junior high, and we went on to remain friends till relatively recently(so I was much less mature, our friendship lasted a long time, we are no longer friends for very unrelated reasons).

I learned her interest in women when we were sharing our "first experiences" and when she told me she thought she technically lost her virginity she wasnt sure it counted cause it was a woman and I was like "Of course it counts!" i cared about being an LGB ally and a feminist in high school and already didn't think that only sex with men was "real sex" or w/e.

I had figured her feelings for me because she was just very obvious LOL It never bothered me I just felt bad that I couldn't reciprocate because she was my best friend in the world and i loved her very much. It was kind a fad for other high school girls to be "bisexual", girls that were kind of obviously straight with boyfriends but stated they were bisexual cause they just "thought girls were sooo much better looking than boys, but I would never date one, too much drama!". I was always anxious of "faking" bisexuality just to be upgraded from "ally" to "part of the community", I had "dated" girls pre puberty but I hadn't thought of them since. Most of my negative feelings around her liking me revolved around feeling like I either WAS bisexual and just couldn't find her attractive and I felt bad cause she was my best friend. I felt like if i was bisexual and I liked her personality so much i SHOULD like her. alternatively I was scared of being another fake bisexual and trying to date her to make her happy and then being a bad ally and a bad friend if we broke up.(i was a teenager LOL)

Anyway, how it happened was, I was at some new years party and she called me around midnight and she was really flustered and clearly nervous and scared and basically like I need to tell you something, in my mind I was alittle like "oh no shes gonna tell me" but not cause I was bothered about a confession, but cause she was trying to do it in a really romantic way at midnight as everyone was kissing around me and I wasn't sure how to respond that wouldn't ruin her night and her new year and her WHOLE YEAR.

So midnight hits and theres shouting and shes just like I love you!(or something...she made it clear it was romantic somehow) I just smiled and put warmth in my voice and told her I know.

I can't remember what we said but there was just some nervous rambling a bit back and forth where she clarified she knows I'm straight and I just kept smiling and keeping my voice gentle and reaffirming yeah I'm straight.

I just wanted her to know it didn't change anything, I don't mind. I didn't wanna like apologize cause its like...it isn't a choice? and I didn't want her to have to comfort ME when shes pouring her heart out with these "I know no I'M sorry i just wanted to tell you!"

So it went fine on my end, Idk what was really going on in her head. Idk if I reacted well enough to help her broken heart or enough to really make her understand that it wasn't like....her fault? for falling in love? its ok, of course you love your best friends?

The only other time a girl tried to confess to me was recently was a gendie friend who knew I was in a relationship and straight but wanted to be "genderqueer platonic" with me cause she "wanted to be special to me" and it made me feel like..."but you are special to me? your my friend?" I instantly felt like she didn't see me as a friend, and that my friendship wasn't good enough for her.

I'm hoping my two experiences give you some insight, I feel like they are all pretty different.

TLDR; My personal advice(take all actual advice at your own risk XD)your way sounds pretty good to me personally, I easily roll with stuff, would have preferred that method lol. feels like a true friend just keepin it real, which i love.

I'd love an update tho! or if you need more advice my inbox(and dms)is open.

#maretext #mare advice #long post #one time before she confessed and when i know she liked me #she had chocolate kisses in her room and i was like can i have a kiss #we were standing a room apart and i had my back to her and i turn around holding the chocolate cause i realized what i said #and she was frozen in the doorway staring #and i just was awkwardly standing there like oops #and she was like OH YEAH OF COURSE #it was funny but i just felt SO BAD

19 notes · View notes

inforapound · 3 years

Text

The Devil Inside - Part 2

Your enthusiasm spurred me on to write chapter two last night. The teen talk continues. This part escalates alittle faster. I’ll post the last part next week. Thanks for reading.

Warnings - sexually explicit, hints of dub/con, possessiveness, love

Pairing - Ivar x Reader

The following week was mundane. Not once did you catch a glimpse of the black Camaro at school and you had spent every break out in the lot. For reasons you had yet to figure out, you could not stop thinking about him. Ivar... That entire night at his house and you analyzed, picking apart every moment. The way he looked at you, the mocking way he spoke, how he grabbed your wrist. It hadn’t hurt, but it was shocking. The one detail that stuck out the most, and the feeling that you couldn’t shake, was how even in a room with others, you felt him. Some pull or draw of your attention. Some dread or distraction. It was strange and by Friday, without seeing him at school, it wasn’t relief you felt, it was melancholy.

The girls noticed and chalked it up to PMS so you all decided to skip going home and headed straight for the mall. That was uninteresting and after a couple of hours of wandering shops, trying on rings at the kiosks, and hitting up the food court, you headed to HUBB City Movie Theatre to catch a flick.

Standing in line it was Kim who spotted them first.

“Heads up,” she spoke quietly, nudging your arm.

Turning around, you spotted Mark waiving, a huge grin on his face, with both Ivar and Hvitserk standing behind. Your stomach flopped and you must have made a face as Amanda leaned in.

“Dude, are you okay?”

“Fine, yea, fine.”

“You looked like you’d seen a ghost.”

“Didn’t that Ivar guy freak you out a bit last weekend?” Kim asked.

“Ah, I don’t know. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe it was just me.”

“He is…. intense,” Kim added.

“My brother told me some guy at Oak Springs High owed the brothers money.” Amanda was using her ‘this was some juicy shit’ tone of voice, “and Ivar showed up, scared the crap out of him. Waived a gun around in the parking lot.”

“What!” you and Kim said at the same time.

Amanda arched her brows. “I don’t know...just telling you what I heard.”

A quiet settled over all of you and you casually glanced back at the guys. Mark and Hvitserk seemed to be discussing a poster on the wall but Ivar wasn’t even pretending not to look. Those haunting blue eyes were fixed right on you. It was a drastic change from last time and he seemed to be waiting, keeping track of how long it would take for you to acknowledge him. Unsure of how to act, you gave a quick half-smile before looking away.

“Too bad he’s a psycho,” Amanda whispered, “cause he’s fucking hot.”

You all burst out laughing and as you handed over your tickets and headed through the doors, you heard Mark call,

“Save us some seats, ladies.”

Great…… but fifteen minutes into the movie you figured they had decided on something else as it was just the three of you sitting in your usual seats; centre of the back row, directly beneath the booth streaming the film. Amanda was in the middle bitching about the cost of popcorn and you were feeling chilled in the large dark theatre, wishing you had headed home before the movie to get changed out of your uniform.

A commotion off to the side, followed by Mark’s not-so-quiet laugh made you all turn and look toward the isle on Kim’s side. Making their way down your row was Mark and Hvitserk; Mark shout-whispering that he thought you all were trying to hide by sitting up at the back. They must have been carrying $75 worth of snacks and you figured they had just gotten high.

Watching the entrance, you waited for Ivar to come through but he didn’t... He wasn’t there... Had he ditched, you wondered, feeling confused? Was it because of you? Were you disappointed? The moment brought back that anxious feeling of the previous weekend, the claws back in your tummy and you actually felt a little dissed.

Oblivious to the film playing in front of you, it was the sound of clanging metal on your side of the theatre that made you turn and look. Shuffling toward you, down your row was Ivar, his crutch hitting against the metal feet of the chairs in front.

Fuck, you nearly gasped realizing he was planning to sit with you and you felt a rush of adrenaline. Tucking your hair behind your ear, you shifted in your seat unsure if you were nervous or excited. Had he really flashed a gun? No. Stupid. He couldn’t have.

When he got close, his scent hit you like a memory and you recalled that subtle smell of aftershave in his bathroom. Unsure if you should say hello, you were let off the hook as his eyes looked everywhere but at you. Holding a massive drink in one hand and his crutch in the other, he stopped and awkwardly sat down.

You were struck by the subtle look of insecurity he had, guessing that without his badass car or his parentless mansion, he felt out of place. His discomfort made you panic alitte pushing you to say something.

“Hey,” you whispered, and he looked over as if surprised; his reaction making you smile. The smile was not returned but the look in his eyes removed all doubt of whether or not he was pleased to see you. He was. Ivar Lothbrok smiled. Almost shyly and you NEARLY DIED.

Turning back and trying to watch the film was ridiculous. There was no way you could absorb a thing with him sitting beside. Again, that expectant feeling hung in the air and you, like that first night, were hyper-aware of him; his movements, his arm slung on the rest of your chair, every time he shifted. And... he looked good...really good...downright wicked in fact and you glanced over to catch another look. The light was flickering against his smooth skin and pouty lips and you just wanted to see that smile again. Looking back to the screen, you attempted to pay attention.

Just as you began to absorb the words the actors were saying, he passed over his drink, his eyes staying fixed on the screen. Accepting it, you to took a sip from the straw and were not surprised to taste the sweet mix of some sort of pop and booze. The taste nearly made you cough and you passed it over.

With his hand, he pushed it back toward you making you frown. Did he think you drank every weekend? Was he trying to get you drunk?

Suddenly, he leaned in, bringing those lips close to the side of your head.

“Are you that much of a good girl?” he whispered and the reverberation of his voice made you shiver.

You turned to look but he didn’t pull back so your faces were close. Very close.

“I’m driving,” you whispered.

Rolling his eyes, he sat back in his chair and the impression you got was that he wouldn't be leaving you alone for long. It felt tense and you somehow thought getting his attention again might smooth out the static.

“I didn’t see you at my school this week.”

That drew him back. His head snapped over and he just looked at you. The scene changed in the movie and the light in the room brightened; his blue eyes were narrowed and you wondered what he was trying to figure out.

Without a word, his gaze lowered and you watched him rake his eyes over the open neck of your white blouse, your blue cardigan, and the skin of your thighs exposed above the hem of your kilt. With no one sitting in the row in front, you had put your feet up, tucking your toes into the seat. Suddenly, the bare skin of your legs felt elicit. Dropping your feet would have been too obvious so you hugged the folded blazer in your lap a little tighter.

Rolling his tongue in his cheek, you could see he was fighting the urge to smile and he leaned in again.

“Are you saying you missed me?”

Your stupid grin broke before you could think of what to say so as a distraction you reached down and grabbed his drink, taking another sip.

“Kiss me,” he said.

It wasn’t a question and you nearly choked.

“What?” you gawked.

Pulling back slightly, he eyed you, his expression was deadpan, almost daring you not to do as you were told. But, he did not wait long and brought his mouth right to yours, not pushing, just hovering close and you could feel him lick his lips. Fuck....was your last thought as you pressed your mouth to his.

Good lord was it ever gentle, not demanding and, and like that hunter in that song playing in his room that night, you sensed that he was holding back, drawing you closer.

That’s why when he broke the kiss first, there was a simper on his face, a smug look like he had just won. But, it was his large hand wrapping around your thigh that made you know it was only the beginning. He had it all wrong though. This was not something you did. You were a second base pro and that was only after a thousand texts, five hundred calls, and numerous dates out. You were not a fast girl from his world. Whatever that meant.

Glancing over at Amanda, her attention was fixed on the screen so you looked back at Ivar. Watching the film again, he jerked his chin, directing you to keep your eyes forward. Attempting to focus on the movie, you shifted your blazer on your lap to conceal his hold on your leg and he obviously took it as a green light. Slowly, he slid his palm further up, the tips of his fingers only stopping when they touched the fabric of your panties. God, this was crazy and you took a deep breath. Why were you playing along?

“Open your legs,” he glanced at you, speaking softly but it was still an order. “Do it.”

Frowning you mouthed the word no but at the same time shifted your knees apart.

“Good girl,” he whispered and you were shocked at how that small praise shot straight between your legs. Adjusting on the seat, you slid your bum forward as if offering yourself up.

Pleased, he smirked and you tried to ignore it, acting as if you were unaware of what he was doing.

Within a second, his finger started stroking you through the thin layer of cotton, slow and steady as if biding time. Showing his experience, he pushed the fabric to the side, his finger pressing between your folds. Jesus Christ, it was insane and you should have stopped him there but didn’t… instead, you tilted your pelvis up wondering if that would please him. And it did evidenced by his quiet, breathy grunt and you weren't sure if it was his approval or the feel of his slow strokes that had you getting so wet.

Smoothly, expertly he found that little buried spot and strummed like a string, making you flinch and close your eyes, grabbing hold of his wrist. You didn’t push him away, just squeezed and despite not seeing him, you again felt him lean close.

The smell of his alcohol-laced breath fanned over your face making that tickle down there begin to throb. Your mouth fell open and you were aware that your own breath was picking up. It was obscene, if not a little embarrassing how wet you were and just how fast he was bringing you to the brink.

He strummed and strummed and you wondered what instruments he could play. Guitar…. yes definitely guitar and just that idea was sexy bringing you even closer.

“That’s it,” he coaxed, “Cum for me.”

You were nearly there. How was it possible?

“Look at me,” he demanded and you barely had the sense to turn your head, your eyes cracked only alittle.

“Fuck,” he hissed, staring at you. “I wanna eat your pussy.”

All at once, his finger pushed inside you as his lips hit yours, his tongue shoving right into your mouth. Overwhelmed, and feeling pinned by his jaw, his finger pushed harder and his palm pressed against your clit. The image of him between your legs, lapping your wetness was a recipe for magic and your orgasm crashed over you.

You came hard, harder than you ever had, pulsating around his finger, your stomach twitching and your body frozen in place. Any sounds you made; whimpers, gasps were absorbed by his mouth, breathing you in and bringing you through. It was suffocating and borderline aggressive but so fucking hot and you wondered if the setting, the people around made it that much more intense.

As the quaking eased and you came back to your senses, he pulled his mouth away, pecking you on the mouth and cheek, and chin.

Carefully, he pulled his hand out from under your kilt and you quickly glanced over at Amanda. Smiling at something up on the screen, she seemed lost in the story. Thank god.

Seeing Ivar wipe his fingers on his jeans nearly made you cringe but he seemed unphased, adjusting the crotch of his jeans before grabbing his drink from you that you completely forgot you were holding.

“Are you a virgin?” he asked in a whisper, looking at you out of the corner of his eye.

His brows were pinched together making you hesitate, sensing, there was no right answer to give?

“Ah,” be aloof, you thought, be aloof. “Not… exactly.”

“Not exactly?” he squinted.

“Technically,” you scrunched your face awkwardly. “I am not a virgin.”

Holding your gaze for a moment, he sniffled, signifying the topic was done. Scooping your hand in his, he linked his fingers between yours and leaned close, pecking your lips softly and so unexpectedly sweetly.

“I was right about you. You are a good girl,” he nodded and turned his attention back to the screen just as the credits started to roll.

Already? The dim lights came on and you felt on the spot, wondering how you would flounder through this next part. Letting go of your hand, he grabbed his crutches and without a second glance, pushed himself up and started down the aisle away from you.

Ummmmm. Hello? What was going on?

Toward the end of the row, he glanced back and called,

“I’ll text you in a bit.”

And then he was off. Your mouth literally fell open.

“Catch you, ladies, on Monday,” Mark hollered on the other side, already halfway to the door, hopefully oblivious to all that had just transpired.

----

Once out of the theatre, you inhaled the fresh evening air, filling your lungs like you had never breathed before. You felt….lude having just spread your legs for some guy with your best friend in the next seat.

“Well,” Amanda, smacked her lips, sliding her blazer on, “That was special.”

And you knew she knew everything.

“What the hell was that?” she gawked as Kim joined, not saying anything but looking confused.

“God,” you covered your eyes, “I don’t know. I’m so sorry,” you looked at her, your shame spilling out onto the sidewalk.

“Who are you?” she frowned, “I’m so.. so…impressed right now.” Tipping her head back, she let out her best cackle. “For once I’m not the only one hooking up with randos on the weekend,” she laughed again.

She wasn’t quite that bad but next to her, you were Mother Theresa.

“Okay, who is hooking up with who?” Kim raised her hands, motioning that she needed to catch up.

“Did you see everything?” you asked, holding your breath.

“No...I actually saw nothing but I knew what was going on. Wait, do you like him? What don’t we know? Are you…like…with him now?”

“No!” you replied exasperated. “I don’t even know him.”

“Okay, who are we talking about?” Kim cut it, totally frustrated.

“Ivar!” you and Amanda answered in unison

“Whaaaa...” Kim said under her breath, really drawing it out. “That guy is bad news.”

“I know. I know,” you repeated trying to convince them…. and yourself.

“Oh god, you like him,” Amanda squinted as if noticing something she hadn’t seen before. “Yep,” she nodded, “you do.”

“Do you like him?” Kim asked, not believing it.

“I don’t know,” is all you could say.

Taking a cigarette out, Amanda lit it and you and Kim, as usual, took a step back to get clear of the smoke.

“So,” she took a drag, “what message do you think it sends a guy, you aren’t sure you even like, when you let him finger you in a movie theatre?”

“Amanda!” Kim scolded but you all started to laugh.

“That no means sometimes...” you shrugged.

“What?” they said at the same time.

“Did he force you?” Kim asked, her face immediately concerned.

“No!” you threw up your hands. “No!” Wait, did he, you wondered for a second, quickly pushing it out of your head. “No, he didn’t. Let’s…let’s just go.”

Linking arms, the three of you walked in a line, heading back to your car. For numerous reasons, your head felt disconnected from your body.

-----

That night, lying in your bed, you looked at your phone but all was quiet. How stupid, you thought, he hadn’t even asked for your number. Scoffing in the dark, you pretended, unconvincingly, that you were not waiting for his text. Nothing was wrong. You were just bored, maybe a little lonely rebounding from your ex-jock boyfriend. Sighing, you flipped from your back onto your side, thinking how it had taken your ex an entire summer to get where Ivar had in one night.

Your phone chimed and you jumped, nearly knocking over your lamp to grab it.

It was Amanda…….

AMANDA: Call me if you need me. Love you.

You felt like an idiot.

Nexr chapter

@youbloodymadgenius @whenimaunicorn @ceridwenofwales @sweeneythots @funmadnessandbadassvikings @redama @mdredwine @didiintheblog @londongal2810 @fields-and-fields-of-poppies @oddsnendsfanfics @youbelongeverywhere @flowers-in-your-hayr @hecohansen31 @naaladareia @gearhead66 @blonddnamedhandz @lisinfleur @geekandbooknerd @xbellaxcarolinax @edythofhastings @ivarsgoddess @shannygoatgruff @where-beauty-goes-to-die @zuxiezendler @punkrocknpearls @snatcherheart @lordsexmachine @fuchsiagrasshopper @wilhhelmyna @heavenly1927

#modern ivar #ivar au #ivar fanfic #ivar lothbrok #ivar the boneless #ivar and reader #ivar imagine #ivar smut #ivar teen romance

85 notes · View notes

nan-chi · 3 years

Note

Hi, hope you're doing well! First, I just wanted to mention that I seriously love your art, you draw so beautifully! All your pieces end up looking so amazing.

Second, I was thinking posting my own art, but I'm having trouble figuring out where and how to start, and I'm also really new to Tumblr. I literally have no idea what to do lol. Since you're my favorite artist for the fandom(s), I wanted to ask what your experience was like starting your account/ posting fan art for the first time, and how you got recognition, followers, etc.

Any advice, tips, or suggestions you can offer on starting a fan art account is greatly appreciated too! Thank you so much if you do answer this ask, it'll help me out, or anyone else in my situation a lot!

Thank you so much, I really appreciate your nice words ♡

Funny enough this account was not for art at the beginning xD

I downloaded ikemen revolution and I loved it.. I was new to tumblr too and I was just sharing screenshots and fangirling xD

I don't even remember my first piece here but it was all just casually sharing something I drew.. It was so spontaneous I didn't think much about it!

And I was like Wow some people like my art! I don't know what's wrong with them but that's cool 😂

The real start was the ikerev Lancelot birthday countdown, he's my favorite character so far and I genuinely wanted to try something alittle bigger,

It was a countdown for 11 days, a drawing per day..and I've never draw continuously like this before.

I remember the positive reactions on this, the whole thing was so genuine and this made me realize 2 things :

1. I can draw more than I thought I could

2. I love to draw xD this is the way I enjoy all these games!

and that's when I started to smoothly shift into making it an art account.. Because that what I want and what I feel like doing!

You don't have to figure out how to start.. You just start!

There are some pieces that I find them extremely ugly now xD but I had fun back then and that's the important thing!

if you feel like drawing something, draw it. Then post it. That's it.

Not gonna lie... Sometimes -even for now-I get alittle anxious before I click "post" xD and I go like "will they like it? There's some mistakes here and there.. I'm not so sure of the concept.. Blah blah... " but you get used to it I guess xD

I mean if you reach this "post" point then you have a finished artwork right? What's the worst thing? Even if it's bad, no problem! It's just a chance to learn!

And that's the mentality I developed from the beginning... I'm making fan art to practice in a fun way while enjoying things I love! ≧ω≦

This helped me more than anything!

Btw I started making art in 2018 and this is kinda late, I didn't draw for years since I was a teenager because of some complicated issues, but I'm telling you this so you can see that it's not about when you start, and it's not about how you start and what's your level... It's just about starting!

And luckily the tags system here helps so much, you can naturally reach people with using proper tags

And if you keep doing something for some good amount of time, you naturally grow followers and you naturally get better.

I suggest you set up a schedule for yourself to help you keep going.. Find the timeline suitable for you and try to draw regularly

But let me tell you something and I believe it's the most important thing about this topic:

Never let numbers determine your potentials!

I know we all need some sort of confirmation but if you keep your eyes on numbers it can lead you to unhealthy road, specially at the beginning because it's a slow burn process.. it needs time to build followers and reach people

Take your time to experience and develop your art, and feel free to try anything you want!

Also let me tell you some funny fact!

Sometimes it's about the characters not your art xD

If you make some not so good art for a very popular character, it's high chance to get more engagement/recognition just because of their popularity xD

And you can spend hours working your best on a character that's not so popular and people will not even notice it because they're not interested in that character xD this can be really deceiving specially with how crowded the social media is now!

and sometimes it's about communicating and socializing!

If you have big group of friends/mutuals you can easily reach more people.

But I believe good things shine bright, so no matter what happens keep going!

Only you knows your real abilities.. Maybe we don't have confidence in our work "for now" but you know you can reach more! People don't see how much time/effort you spend on getting better so don't let them make you feel down.

I talked so much xD but simply if you love something it's more than enough! Just enjoy the journey to its fullest! ✨💕

#ask nan chi #art talk

17 notes · View notes