#look i love when they’re gay and stupid
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𝙸 𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛
Pairing: Exotic Dancer!Bucky Barnes x Plus Size!Reader (no mention of gender or ethnicity)
Summary: Hi, you've reached [your name]. I can't come to the phone right now, please leave a message after the beep!
w/c: 3.7k
warnings: cheating (on reader), lots of cursing, smoking, heavy drinking, weed smoking, body image issues (I'm sorry), this is a smutty fic (but there’s no smut), dry humping. Please let me know if I missed anything <3
a/n: This is the first fic I've posted in years lmao, I'm a bit rusty, but omfg I enjoyed writing this so much, it's very self-indulgent hehe I hope you love it just as much as I do.
this is not beta'd, any and all mistakes are my own.
Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply encouraged🥺
7:51 PM
“Baby please, You know I’m an idiot…she means nothing” Jake whined through the phone.
As of 5 hours ago, he became your ex but kept on calling you, each call pleading for your forgiveness and saying the same stupid excuse “I felt you pulling away, what was I supp-”
Before you could interrupt him yourself, your best friend and roommate took your phone “Listen closely you little shit, if you don’t stop calling I’ll personally chop off your balls, fry’em up and feed them to your mother in a fucking salad… it’s Wanda by the way” she huffs as she hands you back the phone, “Colorful” you grimace.
Shoving you inside the car, with you and Wanda on the back, Bruce behind the wheel and Tony as co-pilot, “Why do you even answer his calls?” Tony asks while Wanda lights up a Marlboro, and gives you a drag “Because I want to tell him to go fuck himself… I- I just can’t seem to find the right words”, “That seems right” Wanda quips and you roll your eyes, “Don’t worry you’ll find the words when the time’s right” Bruce adds, “Dr. Banner is right, tonight is all about getting shit-faced” Tony adds.
You all clap and turn up the volume to the perfect song “I don’t wanna hear, I don’t wanna know” Wanda sings, the wind on her face, while Bruce shouts “WE LOVE YOU MADONNA”.
They were right, fuck Jack, tonight you wanted to let go, you weren’t one for parties or clubbing but you couldn’t stay at home feeling sorry for yourself, partying with your friends seemed like the perfect distraction “LET’S FUCKING GO” you shouted at the top of your lungs.
9:05 PM
“The Hush-Hush Hideaway?” you laughed as you finished your first beer after two cherry vodka shots, sounds like a place where 50 year olds would come to have an affair, “Alright, alright before you keep on talking trash, there is more eye to meet” Tony argues, to that Wanda snorts “are you seriously drunk right now? after three piña coladas?”, Bruce laughs “they’re stronger than they look” Tony defends himself as he stands up, signaling you all to head to the dance floor.
You honestly loved the place, the lighting was incredible, the atmosphere was hot pink with hints of dark red and deep purple, the ceiling was decorated with hundreds of disco balls shining down on you, the bar had tables so crystalline and so red, it looked like solidified blood, each one surrounded by the comfiest leather couches. There was also the dance floor which you were dancing on now, it had the perfect stage for dancers or any kind of show, the whole place had the perfect mix of chic and urban.
10:39 PM
“This round’s on me” Tony shouts over the loud music as he hands you what would probably be your 5th drink, stumbling around as you danced to a song that suddenly became your favorite, as you downed the liquid gold you took Tony’s hand and started giving him a lap dance of some sorts which made everyone laugh along with you.
And then everything went pitch black, for 5 seconds the music was over, lights were out, for a moment you thought you passed out but then a huge white light shone straight into the middle of the stage, “Girls Gays and Theys!” a deep voice over the microphone started, “is this a gay bar?” Bruce genuinely chimed in, making you giggle.
“Tonight we encourage you to let that wild side of yours out! Please give a warm welcome to The White Wolf” the voice cheered with excitement and the crowd roared and cheered back, “he must be really good looking” you sassed, and in that moment, red ropes descended.
Not a second later a man dressed in a kevlar suit swirled down as if swimming in the red fabric, wrapping himself in a cocoon in the air so the next second he rolled down to the stage, the top of his leathery suit gone, leaving his gorgeous toned abdomen exposed making the crowd go wild. The lights enhanced his beautiful body. “D-does he have glitter on?!” Tony shouted in awe, everyone absolutely going crazy over this tall, brown-haired, thick oh so fucking thick specimen.
On the other hand, you were finding breathing a difficult task, especially because his eyes were trained on yours, maybe it was the several drinks in your system or the empowering song that heightened everything, but his stare was intense, the ice blue of his eyes chilled your spine and for a moment you thought he was going to stop the show, come down and rip your clothes off… yeah you definitely felt tipsy now.
This man knew the power he held, not only was he drop-dead gorgeous, he had autonomy of every nerve and every muscle on his body, your heart and pussy were practically pulsing as you watched him dance. The magic was broken when you felt your phone ring in your pocket, taking it out, you saw it was Jake calling AGAIN, you knew your friends would tell you not to pick up, but part of you wanted to hear him out and scream at him, you didn’t know which one you were going to do.
Leaving the dance floor and heading to the bathrooms where you hoped it’d be quieter, you swipe to the green bubble “Please please forgive me” is the first thing the man says, making you sigh in frustration “S-top stop saying you’re sorry” but it’s like talking to a wall, you’re not even sure he heard you because he just keeps on whining.
??:??
You don’t know how much time you spent listening to him in the bathroom but eventually, you give up and hang up on him, splashing some fresh water in your neck you exit the room and bump into a rock-hard wall, but then unexpectedly the wall starts talking and you think maybe it’s not a wall.
“it was rude to bail” a grave voice rumbles in your ear through all of the noise, looking up you see it’s the white wolf, making you almost choke on air, but you were quick enough to react and raise an eyebrow in response “sorry?”.
Without even noticing, the man had cornered you into a wall “Don’t apologize, you can make it up to me” he said with a wild smile, “oh he’s good” you thought, then he looked at you as if he read your mind, “you look like someone in desperate need to have some fun… let me give you a hand” he whispered, his confidence made you forget he was a stranger, and oddly enough it felt like you knew him perfectly, the thought of spending your night with him made you shudder.
Taking out what looked like a big fat blunt from one of his pockets, he dragged the little bundle of joy from your exposed thighs, up your arms, slowly passing through your neck, and finally grazing your soft lips, his eyes never once leaving yours, he leaned in and the smell of cedarwood with a touch of french vanilla made your eyes roll.
Man, you’re really not keeping your cool, but he’s too beautiful for you to care, you might as well pucker your lips, but then he backs away, taking your hand and leading you to the backdoor between the kitchens. The sound of music and people dancing start to disappear until it’s muffled, “are we allowed in here?” you laugh as he lights up the joint and takes a big gulp, your heart pounds with excitement, this is exactly what you needed.
Your inner demons whispered that he really wasn’t interested in you, he looked like he was sculptured by frigging Michelangelo, he’d never want to be with someone as big as you, plus you felt sweaty from dancing most of the night, but honestly, it was more about the nerves you felt around him, but just as easy as the negative thoughts came, he batted them away with a single kiss to your cheek, near enough to the corner of your lips “lost you there for a sec” he teased.
As he handed you the joint, you took it with hesitance, “I usually don’t take marihuana from strangers, you got a name or does everyone call you the white wolf?” you teased, carefully eyeing him, realizing that he was still shirtless unconsciously making you bite your lip.
A lazy smile spread on his face “Waddaya mean you don’t know me? Pfft I’m your latest conquest”, it threw you off but he looked so sincere it made the butterflies in your stomach dance, “I’m Bucky” he laughed, he was so at ease with that pretty smile you couldn’t do anything but swoon.
Taking a drag of the blunt you breathe out the smoke through your nose as you offer him your name in return, not wasting a second he repeats it, slowly, maybe he was high but it seemed as though he enjoyed the sound of your name on his tongue, he savored it, your legs pressed against each other and you had to take another drag so not to seem desperate as you were for him.
He might be a stranger but deep down you felt unbelievable attraction, in less than 10 minutes of knowing him he made you feel powerful, and free, like maybe in a past life or somethin’ he was your soulmate… Pfft, you wanted to crack up at your own thoughts, somehow Bucky knew and started laughing, slowly leaning into you and crashing his lips with yours, it was sloppy but fuck you’d never been kissed like that, it was passionate, you felt wanted, right then and there you were ready and willing to let him swoop you off your feet.
12:59 AM
Bucky was showing you his best moves, his calloused hands gripped and groped your body as you both swayed your hips against each other perfectly in sync.
He was so smooth, the fogginess of the joint rumbled through your body, each touch, every one of his strokes felt like a wave, you were floating in a sea of music and his scent, nothing was wrong with the world, nothing could harm you because he was right behind you, worshipping you, telling you how he loved the feel of every roll and every curve, you couldn’t help but smile and he couldn’t help but kiss that beautiful smile.
Not long after your friends found you and you introduced them to the dancer who blew their minds, some of his friends joined you, and not long after you were the life of the party, shots and blunts came pouring, and just like you wanted you became one with bucky, you didn’t know where you began or where he ended, pain and misery were a strange and unknown concept tonight.
1:55 AM
Wanda had to drag you away from Bucky to chat with you a bit, she couldn’t hide that grin even if she tried “Dude I don’t even recognize you right now” you laugh with her knowing very well what she means, squeezing her wrist you stop the urge to squeal, “I don’t know how this happened but fuck he’s just so pretty I wanna cry” you both giggle, understanding the Rachel Green reference.
Turning to see Bucky you caught him already watching you, it looked like he was chatting with his friends but he wouldn’t look away from you, you realized he was waiting for you, and honestly you were eager to return to his embrace and intoxicating scent “Fuck Jack, you have men waiting in line” Wanda practically shouts as she pushes you back to the dance floor.
2:12 AM
After a while your social battery was low and you needed a break, so now you leaned against the wall in the back alley of the bar, a cigarette lit, resting on your fingertips as you recalled the events that brought you here tonight.
You didn’t blame Wanda for reminding you of Jake and what he did, after all, she was just hyping you, but now your mind was plagued, you memorized with detail how you found them, as some sort of self-punishment, why? you didn’t know, after years of therapy, you were still trying to unlearn self-deprecating thoughts that your family and society shoved in your face.
Jake cheating on you with a leggy blonde who was quite literally a Victoria's Secret model was a kick to your stomach, it made you realize that maybe every bad thought you had about yourself was true, and that was terrifying…
Realizing that the cigarette burned itself out, you stepped on it, but before you could come back inside Bucky opened the door and grinned “There you are, was worried I spooked ya”, to that you chuckled, somehow the laws of social battery didn’t apply to the handsome trapeze dancer “Never”.
Stepping outside and standing next to you, he takes your hand and starts playing with your fingers “What’s got my sweet doll so down?”, you expected the pet name to make you cringe but instead swooned. Lighting another cigarette you take a drag and blow it on his face, and he just bites the smoke, making you giggle, after a beat of silence you show him your heart.
“About… 11 hours ago, my boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend, cheated on me” you sigh, trying with all your might not to shed a single fucking tear, Jake didn’t deserve them, “Gimme his address” he deadpans, a look so deadly in his eyes, that spark was almost snuffed, but just as quickly his attitude changed, “I’ll kill 'im with my bare hands, I’LL FUCKING KILL ’IM” he shouts with foux determination, making wild animal noises that are making you laugh so hard you can’t breathe “you’re not funny” you say out of breath.
His thumb cleans away a single runaway tear, his touch is so gentle at first you’re not even sure he’s holding you, he’s so close you feel his breath on your cheek and his nose caressing your skin oh so lightly, “you’re dreaming”, you think incredulously.
In a second his touch becomes rough as he grips your face with both his hands, holding you still so you can’t look anywhere but his eyes, “he’s a fucking moron” he spits out, almost insulted, “and I don’t mean a jerk or plain stupid, I mean he’s missing some fucking brain cells to let go of someone so insanely beautiful as you”.
Your heart’s pounding in your ears, you’re about to explain but he cuts you off “And I don’t even need to know him, to be sure of what I’m telling you right now” he scoffs, “Hell, I don’t even have to know you to be sure, in the very short time I’ve known you, you’ve been everything” bucky almost can’t believe he’s saying this to you, suddenly the tension is palpable and neither of you can breathe…
“You’re driving me insane” is the last thing he says before pushing you against the wall, with a grunt he grips your waist and your lips crash with his, in a fight for dominance your tongues swirl, it’s as if Jake or any other man never existed, washed away by the ocean that is Bucky.
You loved how vocal he was being, he moaned into the kiss as you practically humped him, he bit your swollen lips as a warning to slow down but it only turned you on more. You could feel your hardened nipples rub against his chest, and it drove both of you nuts, with all his strength he pulled away, leaving you dizzy and pulling him for more, he’s never wanted anyone the way he wants you but he would never have sex with someone so drunk, even if that person begged as nicely as you were right now.
He laughs as you start leaving hot open kisses throughout his neck and jaw purring like a cat, “Bucky please” you mewled, asking him for more, his hand flew to grasp your hair in a tight grip, nibbling on your skin as he reached your ear “We aren’t doing anything except kissing the fuck out of each other doll” he whispered.
You made for a grab to his groin but he was able to take your hand and hold it above your head “I want you nice and sober when I get you to cream on my cock”, he groans as you make a final attempt to lure him in, but you know he’s right, so you huff in defeat, a pout on display to make your feelings known, “baby doll what’s wrong? you look flushed” he teases as you gasp in faux offense.
3:45 AM
The bar kicked everyone out but you still had some party left in you and apparently, so did Bucky because he’s already got you piggyback riding him to his car, you said goodbye to your friends assuring them you trusted Bucky, his place was less than 10 minutes away and you’d send them your location.
Once you got to the car Bucky stopped in his tracks, “we’re drunk and high as hell” he stated, and like a bucket of iced water you realized he was right “Accurate statement” you snort, carefully dropping you on the ground he swiftly turned to face you “so we should… perhaps, maybe take a cab” he goofs around as he steals small kisses form you “or we can walk? your place’s near right?” you reply, everyone was already gone to ask for a ride but he liked the idea of having some alone time with you, so, he picked you up and placed you on his back “To the Batcave!” he runs as you hold onto him as tight as you could.
4:05 AM
You peacefully walked on the side of the street as cars passed by, one thing that you loved about walking at night was the lack of noise, the night wasn’t completely quiet, you could still hear the cars in the distance, people coming in and out of bars or whatever, the breeze was the perfect temperature and the city lights of New York were shone beautifully.
Hand in hand you walked with your latest conquest as he so eloquently put it, conversation flowing, “I got cheated on once, it fucking sucks” You both laughed at the obvious statement “I thought we were going steady and she got bored” he shrugged, “it was a while ago, but it definitely messed with my head” he whispered as he squeezed your hand, it brought him comfort and you as well.
“You know what’s fucking hilarious though? I was planning on breaking up with him…ok don’t judge me” you laughed, “but I just stayed with him because it was easier to stay in a mediocre relationship than actually fight for my happiness…plus he had a hot tub” you felt stupid for saying it, but he didn’t judge you, his face remained the same, attentive.
Bucky took your hand and kissed each one of your knuckles “I got a really nice bathtub” he murmured into your skin with a smirk, your heart fluttered to what he implied so you jumped and kissed his cheek, holding onto his arm for dear life, content with how the day turned out.
4:38 AM
After smoking yet another joint together you were now straddling your dancer’s lap on his bathtub “It really is a nice bathtub” You grinned between kisses and he laughed, his hands roaming your soft skin under your clothes, you were heaven on earth he kept thinking, he was about to kiss you again but was interrupted by your phone ringing, which made both of you sigh in frustration.
You knew who it was, Jake had been calling over and over for the last 20 minutes and Bucky had enough of the bastard, “Answer him” he ordered, to which you raised an eyebrow “I- can’t I- seriously?” you say almost shocked “You know what you wanna say to him, so say it” he encouraged with a soft smile.
Without thinking twice you pick up, “Finally! what took you so long to pick up?” Jake barks, you have the phone on speaker so Bucky could listen, and he already hated how the jerk talked to you, making him grip your waist with possessiveness.
“What do you want?” you ask almost uninterested, “Baby please forgive me” he cries as if you could ever believe anything he said to you, “I’m so so fucking sorry, what else do you want me to say?!”, to that you let out an unamused laugh “just stop fucking saying you’re sorry, time to put on your big boy pants and take responsibility” you snark, which oddly, turns on bucky beyond belief.
Like a magnet, his lips start leaving love bites on your neck, making you gulp, “Babe let’s be honest, in a month you’ll be begging me to get back together, we both know you need someone to take care of you, you can’t be alone, you need me” he says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, and then you really were done with his bullshit.
“Listen closely you fucktard, stop saying you’re sorry, stop begging me to forgive you, you were a waste of my time and the only reason I didn’t break up with you sooner was because it was convenient for me to stay with your sorry ass” you bark.
You could keep going but now Bucky was humming against your pulse, finding it incredibly hot how you stood up for yourself, he peppered you with hot open kisses that made your mind even fuzzier than the weed, “And I can take care of myself ass” you hiss in delight, it was meant to be an insult but Bucky was making you feel so good…
“Fucking drop that call”, bucky growled into your neck loud enough to be heard over the phone, then sunk his teeth into your soft skin, making you moan, unintentionally into the phone, before dropping it and gripping Bucky’s hair for support as you rubbed against the bulge on his pants “Fuck I can’t wait to make you mine” he moaned, dreaming of all the possibilities, of everything he wanted to do with and to you.
Despite the chills you felt down your spine, despite feeling exactly the same way, you laugh, “Honey… do you think it’s gonna be that easy?” you coo, drunk in power, you devour his perfect pink lips.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction#exoticdancer!bucky#stripper!bucky#sebastian stan#carrot's harvest#Spotify
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“—Lance isn’t even paying attention!”
Lance looks up from his phone, noticing Pidge whining to Coran for the first time.
“I’m paying attention,” he lies.
Pidge ignores him. “It’s not fair! He should forfeit his movie vote! He’s not even gonna watch, anyway.” She turns to Lance, glaring. “He’s gonna be too busy texting Keith and making ga-ga eyes at his phone.”
“I will not!” he says, rapidly trying and failing to delete the ‘wish you were here, Dropout’ text he just sent. “I don’t — I wasn’t even texting Keith! I haven’t talked to him in days!”
Not a single person is fooled. Even Coran, who can regularly be counted upon to be on Lance’s side, is raising an eyebrow.
“Honest!” Lance insists.
“Ugh,” Pidge complains, glaring at him before flopping back on the couch. “I still think your vote shouldn’t count.”
Regardless of her petulance, Lance does get a vote, thank you very much. Unfortunately it comes with an abundance of teasing and wiggling eyebrows from the rest of the team, but whatever. At least his point was made, and he doesn’t have to watch whatever nerd documentary Pidge was gunning for.
To his credit, he does actually try to pay attention to the movie. It seems mildly interesting, at least, some kind of Altean classic, and usually he’d be able to at least appreciate the costumes. He really does try.
Fifteen minutes in, his phone buzzes slightly.
Absolutely not, he tells himself. Do not Pavlov yourself to his ringtone, because that would be humiliating. You can go two hours without talking to him. You’re basically a grown-up, for fuck’s sake. You barely even like him mostly. Plus, if Hunk reads over your shoulder and sees the messages you’re sending to him you will never recover.
Nodding resolutely to himself, he shoves his phone deeper in his pocket and returns his attention to the movie. There’s some kind of conflict happening, maybe between the two romantic leads?
Whatever. Lance is paying attention. The movie is just…unclear.
The second time the phone rings, reasoning with himself is much harder. After all, Shiro isn’t even trying to pretend he’s not falling asleep into his popcorn — he’s not paying attention. And Hunk is intently braiding Allura’s hair, so he’s not paying attention either. The point of family movie night is to spend a few hours in each other’s presence outside of training or missions or meals, so it totally counts even if Lance is on his phone, right?
He has to physically sit on his hands to keep himself from checking his messages. Pidge will needle you about it for eternity, he reminds himself, increasingly desperate.
The third time it buzzes, he gives up. His hands fly to his phone so fast he cringes at himself.
How embarrassing.
Fully aware his ears are bright red, he clicks on the notification, opening his and Keith’s communication line.
mullet-head:
lance? you there?
mullet-head:
did you fall asleep during movie night
mullet-head:
are you pulling an old man shiro
Lance smiles to himself, glancing over at the snoring leader of Voltron, drooling on Coran’s shoulder. Keith never misses a chance to clown on his brother, even if Shiro can’t even see it.
loverboy:
i did not fall asleep u butthead
loverboy:
i’m not shiro
loverboy:
i’m not six i don’t need naps
Keith doesn’t respond for a second, and Lance pictures him with his head thrown back, eyes squinted shut and mouth open wide in the startled way he laughs when he unintentionally finds Lance funny. It makes something warm and simultaneously bitter churn in his belly, thinking of how many lightyears away he is from that brighter-than-the-sun laughter.
mullet-head:
stop making me laugh i’m going to get caught
mullet-head:
i’m on some boring patrol i’m not supposed to be on my phone
Lance narrows his eyes in alarm. If that dumbass is texting him instead of paying attention on a mission, he swears —
loverboy:
patrol where??
loverboy:
please don’t tell me ur dicking around on ur phone on a GALRA BASE
mullet-head:
no no no it’s some supply centre
mullet-head:
look
The texting bubble spins for a moment, loading, then a video comes through. Lance glances around the room surreptitiously, but no one is paying any attention to him. Pidge is chatting quietly with Allura, Coran is totally wrapped up in the film, Shiro’s still sleeping, and Hunk has moved to Allura’s other side to braid the hair on that half of her head. Still, he turns the volume as low as he can, angling the phone away from the others.
The video footage is shaky at first, eventually settling on Keith’s face. He looks good — well fed, healthy.
Handsome.
Embarrassed, Lance pauses the video, taking a moment to observe Keith’s face. It’s stupid and gay and sentimental, but — Lance has been looking for a reason to ask Keith to send him a picture, a video, hell, a voice message. Something to confirm, aside from texts, that he’s alive and well, something for Lance to hold on to, a glimpse of the face he’s missed so dearly (not that he’ll admit it). He’s been too embarrassed to ask, but wanting to feel like he’s in the same room as Keith again.
“I thought the Arizona desert was boring,” video Keith says, exasperated. “But at least it has cool lizards. This place has nothing but rocks, sand, and more rocks. Look.”
The video flips around, showing off Keith’s view. He slowly moves the camera to the side, presumably so Lance can see just how boring the rocks and sand and more rocks is.
Lance squints.
Hang on a second.
Is that flurexonomite?
He rewinds the video slightly, pausing it when he sees it again. He brings the phone close to his face, looking as closely as he can, and lets out a delighted little laugh when he sees it.
It is! It’s flurexonomite!
loverboy:
GET ME THAT ROCK
loverboy:
PLEASE
He screenshots the frame with the rock in it, circling it and sending it back.
loverboy:
THIS ONE
mullet-head:
are you serious
mullet-head:
i send you a video of this boring ass desert that i’m stuck in
mullet-head:
and you focus
mullet-head:
on a rock
mullet-head:
you massive nerd
Lance pouts, even though Keith can’t see it and feel properly guilty. That’s not fair. He’s not a nerd. Rocks are just cool! And he hasn’t been able to find flurexonomite, possibly the coolest of all space rocks that Coran has ever told him about, anywhere!
loverboy:
PLEASE JUST GET ME THE ROCK I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER
mullet-head:
i cannot believe what i am reading with my own two eyeballs
mullet-head:
you
mullet-head:
who calls hunk and pidge a nerd every single day for any reason
Lance can’t help his defensive scoff.
“Everything okay, buddy?” Hunk asks, beyond amused. Lance shoves his phone in his pocket, or tries to, but he’s flustered, so somehow in his panic the phone goes flying out of his hand and onto the floor, face-up, messages clearly displayed.
Lance has never moved so quickly in his life.
He scrambles to the floor faster than he can even register he’s doing it, rolling right off the couch and throwing himself at the device. Unfortunately, Pidge reaches it first, scooping it up with a cackle and tossing it to Hunk.
“Read it out loud!”
“No!” Lance screeches, lunging after the device. Hunk is quick, though, standing on top of the cushions and holding the phone far out of his reach.
“‘Wish you were here, Dropout —’” he starts, gleeful.
“Stop! Shut up! That was a typo!” He attempts to climb Hunk to no avail; the man simply holding him away with one big arm. He’s not even struggling.
Lance knows how embarrassing some of those messages are. He cannot let them see the light of day. The time has come for drastic measure.
Somehow anticipating Lance’s impending violence, Hunk tosses the phone to Allura, who catches it easily and runs to the other couch.
“‘Saw someone dressed in all black on our last diplomatic mission and thought of your emo ass,’” Allura recites.
Lance screams, collapsing to the floor. He won’t be able to wrestle his phone away from her. She could kill him with a toothpick, probably.
He is doomed.
Allura clicks a few buttons and then laughs particularly evilly, making something ice cold shoots through Lance’s veins.
She hasn’t found his notes app, has she?
He can’t risk it. If anyone finds out what he’s written on there — oh, God, there are angsty song lyrics. About Keith. He is going to die. He is going to melt into a puddle of humiliated goo. This cannot happen.
With an ear-splitting war cry, he jumps to his feet, sprinting at her at tops speeds and tackling her to the ground. Before she can react, he yanks the phone from her hand and scrambles away at the speed of light. He dashes out of the common room before anyone can stop him, speeding to his room and locking the door behind him. He walks over to his bed and flops onto it, screaming into his pillow as loudly as he can, face the colour of a red star going supernova and just as hot.
“Every part of being alive is a prison,” he laments to no one. He vows to wallow in his own self-pity for all of eternity.
His phone buzzes.
He gets up to check it so fast he honestly has to take a moment to consider if being this gay is truly worth it.
mullet-head:
video.attachment
He brightens. Two videos in one day?!
Being this gay is worth it, apparently!
“You are truly the biggest nerd I know,” video Keith tells him solemnly. His indigo eyes are bright in amusement — soft, even. He takes two steps and then bends down — Lance keeps his eyes firmly on his friend’s face, he does, he does — and picks up the brown, dusty rock.
Lance heart skips a beat when he realizes it’s the exact right rock, the first time. Keith must have looked very carefully at the photo to get the right rock, for all his teasing. The rock is as tiny as a pinky nail, and it doesn’t exactly stand out.
God, Lance loves him so fucking much.
Video Keith slips the rock into his pocket. “You’re lucky you have me, you goober.”
The familiar banter makes Lance smile wider. It took he and Keith a long time and a lot of understanding to come to the point where they are now, the familiarity, the comfort he knows Keith must feel around him to let his guard down so blatantly, to be so transparently teasing and playful.
It makes his heart hurt, a little. He wishes there wasn’t a screen and a bajillion miles between them.
———
The worst part about the Blades, Keith thinks, is that there’s absolutely zero in between. He’s either bored out of his mind, polishing his sword while patrolling some random supply station, or he’s running for his life, barely making it out of an exploding Galra warship in time to keep all his limbs. There are no middle moments, no time for him to be anything but praying for death to at least put him out of his mind-numbing misery or praying to make it out of a situation alive. No family meals, no strange space mall supply runs, no training with Altean superhumans.
He misses his family.
But he knows he can’t go back. At least not permanently. He made this decision for a reason, and that reason is more important to him than a little bit of boredom or some measly mortal peril.
(Lance is more important to him than a little bit of boredom or some measly mortal peril.)
He sighs as he stares at the bunk above him, tracing the shadows of the bed for the zillionth time. He’s not tired at all, but there’s fuck else for him to do in between now and his next mission. He’s already trained all day today, and there’s only so much he can do with a sword before he wants to put it through his own head.
He misses training with a partner.
He shifts around, looking for his phone. It’s late, and he can’t text Lance — the dumbass is in a healing pod right now because he pulled a Keith and tried to fight a nine foot tall Galran commander with his own two hands to cover for someone — but maybe he can send him a couple messages, anyway. Just for when he wakes up.
It’s not like he has anything better to do.
He leans over as far as he feasibly can in his bunk, trying to reach his uniform. He manages to hook his finger around the sleeve, pulling it closer until he can reach his pocket. He thinks he left his phone in the right one, if he can just pinch the corner —
His hand runs over something small and rough, and he stills.
He pulls out a rock, and for a minute he’s confused — he just washed this thing and he’s been on base for three days, how the hell did a rock get in there — then it hits him.
He smiles. This is Lance’s dorky rock.
He leans back onto the mattress, holding the rock out in front of him. It sparkles slightly in the low light of the barracks, it’s many minerals catching the glow of the Balmeran crystals. It looks like a tiny little jewel in his hands, like a sparkling piece of amber.
Like Lance’s eyes.
Immediately he’s embarrassed with himself for thinking it. It’s so — it’s such a fucking gooey thing to think, to compare this sparking crystal to the deep brown of his teammate’s eyes. It’s not even the right brown, anyway. This rock is on the lighter side — Lance eyes aren’t as ambery orange. In the right shadowy lighting, they’re more of a black, so endlessly dark that you could lose yourself in them, that you could be swallowed right up in the look.
Not always, though. Keith lifts the rock up a little higher, holding it right in front of one of the crystals, and squints, letting his eyesight go blurry.
Once, when they were on a planet startlingly like Earth, Keith and Lance snuck off from a gala and ran to the beach to watch the sunset. Lance has smiled so wide, then, squishing his whole face, and when the golden rays of the settling sun had hit his eyes, they melted into a honeyed amber the exact same shade of the crystal. Keith remembers his mouth going dry, his mind going completely blank. He’d been so starstruck by the sight that he hadn’t even dared to breathe.
Lance had thrown sand at him for staring, and cackled as Keith cussed him out.
Keith pulls his blanket up to his chin, smiling. He closes his eyes, rhythmically rubbing the roughened crystal.
He falls asleep faster than he ever has before.
———
The castle is buzzing with excitement.
Most of its resident are too excited even for words. Breakfast is a mess, everyone bouncing in their seats, grinning so wide they can barely eat. Pidge inhales her food so fast she chokes. Hunk sporks himself in the nose, not paying attention.
It’s visiting day.
In less than two vargas, Keith is going to land a pod in the hangar, here to stay for two full days. One of those days will be a mission, sure, but after that they’ll have several hours to just hang out with their friend for a while, catch up, remember how much they miss him. It’s exhilarating.
They all gather in the hangar when he messages to say he’s close, practically vibrating in place. None of them speak, too pumped for words. They all watch the doors with wide eyes, reading to sprint the moment they open and Keith lands safely.
Only, one of them is too impatient to wait that long.
“Keith!” Lance cries, sprinting forward when the pod is a foot from the ground. Before the pod even lands, the hatch is thrown open, and Keith comes tumbling out, half falling to the floor.
“Lance!”
They crash into each other so hard it’s a miracle they manage to stay standing, embracing so tightly it has to be painful.
“You know, I was once married,” Coran remarks. “I went on a two-decaphoebe exploratory mission in that time. When I returned, I was not embraced that tightly.”
“That’s because you didn’t have an intensely homoerotic rivalry and then a weird half-friendship half-romantic relationship you refuse to acknowledge as such that racketed up your sexual tension to levels that cannot be recorded,” Shiro explains.
Four pairs of eyes blink at him.
“Nobody is as gay as they are,” he simplifies.
“Well, gay or not, I’ve lost patience. Lance does not get to hog all the Keith time, not on my watch.” Hunk marches towards the couple (couple of besties) and lifts them both off the ground in a hug that looks to have rearranged their spinal cords. “Keith! Buddy! We missed you!”
The rest of the team rushes in soon after, hugging and holding and generally just piling Keith with all the love they’ve pent up in his absence. Keith is bright red by the end of it, but visibly pleased, obviously flattered.
“I missed y’all too,” he says. “Seriously. Blades aren’t the same.”
With a herculean amount of strength, they manage to pull away to give Keith some space, heading towards the briefing room to prepare for their mission. They have a fleet to destroy, after all, and an Empire to cripple.
And, of course, the faster they complete their mission, the more time they can spend together with no obligations looming over their heads.
They debrief quickly, making sure not to miss any important information but determined not to dilly dally. They split up to suit up, then run off to their respective hangars, ready and rearing to go. Keith lingers for a second next to Lance.
“Good luck, Sharpshooter.”
Lance grins. “I don’t need it, Samurai. I’m going to kick your ass.”
“Wrong ass to be kicking, dontcha think?”
“Oh, shut up.”
“Keith, you’re with me,” Shiro reminds him, when neither fool looks to be focusing on the impending mission, gently knocking his brother’s shoulders.
Keith nods. “Yeah, coming.” He jogs away from Lance, flashing him one last smile. As he turns to corner, he pulls out the crystal from his pocket, gently pressing it to his lips before slipping it back where he got it.
“What’s that?” Shiro asks, gesturing to the pocket.
Keith looks shifty, like he was caught doing something he shouldn’t. “Uh, just a good luck charm.”
“Since when do you believe in luck?”
Keith shrugs. “Since I started feeling lucky, I guess.”
Far behind them, stopped to tie his bootlace, Lance stares at where the brothers disappeared into the Black Lion’s hangar, wide-eyed.
He recognises that rock.
———
Several hours later, six paladins dock back on the castle, exhausted but satisfied.
“Man, I missed having a full team. That mission was way less horrible than usual,” Pidge says.
“Indeed,” Allura agrees tiredly.
“Almost like we had a good luck charm,” Lance whispers to himself, too quiet for anyone else to hear.
Shiro smiles at them all. “You did great, team. This was by far the most successful mission we’ve had in months.” He turns his smile to Keith in particular, who grins right back. “We missed you, buddy.”
“Missed you too,” Keith murmurs.
“We’ll have plenty of time to catch up tomorrow,” Coran says. “Right now we are all exhausted. Off to bed, my dears.”
They all comply without protest, stumbling out of the bridge and down the halls to their rooms. Keith and Lance walk together. It makes Lance smile, remembering when they used to walk each other to bed, everyone else long asleep, stupid tired after a late night of planning. He doesn’t miss the stress, but he does miss leading with Keith, more than he’d like to admit.
“Hey, wait,” Keith says as they approach their bedroom doors, hand on Lance bicep to stop him.
“What’s up?”
“I, uh, have something for you.” He digs around in his pockets, looking panicked for a moment when he can’t find whatever it is he’s looking for, then visibly relieved when his fist encloses around it. He holds it out to Lance, who accepts it without question. Onto Lance’s palm he drops a sparking brown crystal.
“The flurexonomite,” Lance says, grinning.
Keith rocks back on his heels. “Yeah. I’ve been keeping it safe, you nerd.”
Lance looks up at him softly, unable to summon any playful exasperation at the tease. “Thank you, Keith.”
Keith smiles softly at him. “‘Course.” He puts his hand on his lockpad, opening the sliding door. “Night, Bluebell.”
“Goodnight, Willie Nelson.”
———
The next day is as crowded and energy-filled as expected. To avoid fights over Keith-time, the paladins had made a schedule: most of the day will be spent all together, but each person gets one designated hour of one-on-one time to do as they please. Keith gets dragged from person to person, blushing every time someone grumbles about not having enough time, from sparring with Shiro, swimming with Lance, and painting his nails with Allura.
He cries four separate times. It’s nice to remember how loved he truly is.
As days tend to do, however, it eventually comes to an end. Supper is a somewhat bittersweet affair, everyone knowing that once it’s over, Keith has to head back to his pod, and they won’t see him again for weeks, even months.
They try to make the most of it.
Hunk and Lance cook up something to honour the occasion, Pidge at the kitchen door with Lance’s gun to prevent Shiro, Coran, and Keith himself from so much as looking at the food so they don’t fuck it up somehow. Allura serves her solemn duty as taste-tester, ensuring all food is fit for a royal feast.
It’s amazingly thoughtful, even though Pidge is way too trigger happy. Keith cries again halfway through supper, and half the table joins him.
By the time the team walks him to his pod, they’re all pretty cried out, and determined to put on a happy face. They all hug Keith for way too long and with way too much force, each making him swear to call and text frequently, and to not do stupid things or get himself killed. Keith promises to do one of those things.
Eventually they all, with very knowing and smug looks, wave goodbye and head out, leaving Lance and Keith alone. Both pointedly pretend that they’re not embarrassed about it.
“I have something for you,” Lance says, when Shiro finally exits.
Keith glances at his gigantic care package of collective gifts from the rest of the team, raising an amused eyebrow. “Will I have space for it? The barracks at the Blade are small as shit, you know.”
Lance huffs a laugh, nervous smile pulling at his lips. “It’s, uh, pretty small. Promise.”
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself, then grabs something out of his pocket, holding his fist out to Keith. In his outstretched palm, a mirror of the night before, he drops a silver chain, attached onto a small —
A small, brown stone.
The flurexonomite.
“Good luck charm,” Lance explains quietly. He hesitates for a moment, then powers on. “And a piece of me to carry with you. If you want it.”
For a moment Keith gapes at the precious thing in his palm, the chain Lance must have made by hand sometime when Keith was hanging out with the rest of the team today. It’s simple, just the chain and the rock, but to Keith it’s more valuable than all the universe’ riches put together. To him it’s everything. To him it’s a message.
It is, without even a sliver of a doubt, a manifestation of Lance’s feelings for him. Of his feelings for Lance, too, having picked up the stone at all.
Keith decides to hell with the waiting. To hell with the war, with the consequences, with the long-distance. He grabs Lance’s face in his hands and kisses him as hard and fast as he has been wanting to for longer than he’s willing to admit.
“I fucking love you so much,” he mutters against soft, ful lips. He feels Lance’s smile.
“Yeah no shit, stupid. I gathered that when you kissed the rick I begged you to pick up for me before a mission, like it was a picture of your sweetheart in World War Two.”
Keith huffs, but can’t resist kissing him again. “Are you physically incapable of saying I love you back like a normal person, you dickhead?”
Lance laughs loudly enough to disrupt the kiss. “Yes.” A beat. “I love you too, mulletbrain. If that wasn’t abundantly clear.”
Keith smiles, kissing him one last time before pulling away. “It was.”
He lets Lance clasp the necklace around his neck, relishing in the touch of Lance’s cold fingers on his skin, committing the feeling to memory.
“I’ll miss you,” he says from the pilot seat. “I’ll call you.”
“If you don’t, I’ll fly Red to the Blades and kick your ass,” Lance informs him.
Keith feels like his heart is going to burst. “I don’t doubt it.”
When he finally takes off, castle shrinking to a dot behind him, the weight of his good luck charm around his neck makes leaving feel like less of a goodbye.
#look i love when they’re gay and stupid#vld#voltron#lance#lance mcclain#keith#keith kogane#klance#getting together#pining klance#pining keith#pining lance#blade keith#red paladin lance#team as family#takashi shirogane#coran#allura#pidge holt#hunk garret#fluff and humour#brown-eyed lance#autistic lance#whipped keith#whipped lance#my writing#fic#longpost#broganes
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how to lose a guy in 10 days — csc
choi seungcheol x reader
genre : fluff, smut, enemies to lovers, jealousy (?), fake relationship, bets (yk how the movie goes), profanities
synopsis : you had to prove to your friends that you could easily make a guy lose interest within a week, having no interest in indulging yourself in a relationship after your past ones. all those relationships led you to narrow down a list on how to make a guy sick of you. you had all the card in your hands and seems like you don’t get to play it.
warnings : mdni, proceed with causion bc this is my first actual svt fic it might be shitty. not proofread lol, reminder that this is my take on the plot and it will not flow the exact same plots in the movie
i do not feel so confident about this bc i wrote this with mind in shambles. literally me comforting myself with svt while i'm dying from my studies rn :') pls tell me if you like it bc i would most def appreciate it <3
it was another slow day at work when you sat down at your desk and sighed. all your work mates and friends seems to confide in your reaction but your circle knew that this sigh wasn’t a “damn-im-so-stressed-and-sick-of-work-sigh” for them it was more of a “wow-life-is-hectic-its-almost-making-me-want-a-man”
and just like clockwork their brains clicked and hovered over your cubicle. poor u so startled that you almost gagged on your coffee.
“what?” you shooted
“are we gonna meet boyfriend number 13?” karina said in a sing song voice
“more like fling number 17?” sakura retorted
“maybe a first situationship since she haven’t experienced one yet” yunjin said curiously
“jesus christ i’ve had that much men and i’m not gay yet?” you said surprised
“maybe you just need a new set up?” yunjin asked
“like what doggy style?” karina questioned
“not like that you idiot” sakura glared
“maybe i’m just meant to end up in a church and dedicate my life to holiness” you huffed
“please you would burn the moment you step in a cathedral” sakura laughed
“well i just know how every relationships end, it’s almost like completing all endings for a video game, its predictable and cliche” you sighed
“let’s welcome fling number 17 then” karina announced
“i’m too tired for just fucks you know? it won’t take long before i actually get infection and i turn into a zombie and bite you all from all these stupid ideas” you rolled your eyes at your friends.
right now you just actually need to see if theres a guy out there in the world who could actually commit and actually accept a persons flaws out of love.
all too cheesy but you would like to find a partner who would find no flaws in you and probably just call them your little unique antiques that they can live with.
you were so sick on seeing tutorials or manifestation hacks on the internet because does anyone genuinely love each other anymore? all these “how to become a maneater”, “how to make them dream of you”, “how to make him fall in love using a potion” bullshit got you sick of people now.
why did god even create men to accompany themselves if they’re preferences and expectations are for the deities taste themselves.
“OH MY GOD I GOT IT!” yunjin screamed making all your peers look over to your area
“what is it?” you asked dying for a solution
“what if you meet a guy and just unfling him?” she said as if there was a light bulb above her head
“yall need to make her stop doing overtime” sakura deadpanned
“NOO, like you’re talking all these commitment things all the time then what if you find a random guy and make him not fall in love with you and see if he stays?” she said
“so like i should go out being an annoying red flag and see if he stays?” you giggle but it all went away when all your friends kind of agreed because they’re also sick of u having these guy problems already.
“i guess thats not all bad” karina suggests
“you should wear your best outfit tonight because we will find your lucky target then y/nnie” sakura winked at you before discussing the plans with yunjin and karina
it was not long until the night came as you got ready, you scoffed on how stupid this bet is because it’s like you claimed “very predictable and cliche” to lose a guy.
it was then your friends picked you up and pulled up to the bar. a few shots came by as you hustled through the crowd searching for your so called the one. but as you surf through the tables everyone fell short to your friends standards as if it was a big serious thing.
you grew tired, what was the point, you knew your fate then you should probably accept it now.
you drank your last shot for tonight planning your weekend with whole lots of tubs of ice cream until you flinched by karina grabbing your arm.
“him” she said, audible enough for the three of you to hear. you faced the guy she was referring to as all the noice fade into the background blur hearing yunjin screech and them clapping happily, your time froze.
the most goddamn, drop dead gorgeous man came to sight.
“isn’t that choi seungcheol?” sakura stating a rhetorical question
“they said no one could ever bag him up” yunjin replied
“ooh sounds like one of y/n’s guys” karina giggled.
“are you up for it then?” sakura challenged you
“please this will probably come by a breeze, so? 100 bucks each?” you winked as the three of them agrees after a total chaos.
“choi seungcheol, let the games begin” you muttered
on the other side of the bar there was a crowded group of 13 people who were mindlessly taking shot over shot as they were crowned as the most obnoxiously loud people for the night.
most of them spitting out tipsy thoughts to one another as they joined forces on pinning and choosing choi seungcheol as the victim for tonight.
“here comes the virgin joseph for tonight, choi seungcheol!” dk hooted while hoshi was giggling to any phrases the latter would make out
“isn’t it mary though?” joshua pondered drunkly on the edge of the couch munching on the nuts hoping it would make him sober as it was too early to go home.
“whatever, we still get the point. so what’s with the anti-women behavior cheol?” jeonghan grinned. his smile too wide to seem oblivious of the answer.
“i think dating is now deemed predictable to me,every woman i dated either wants my money, my body, fame, or a father figure” cheol sighed deeply
“wait you’re a dad?” dino’s brows furrowed in deep confusion as cheol stood there with utter disbelief
“i thought we we’re supposed to have a fun hangout today, and now all of you are just looking like alcoholics with all these bottles in our table” seungcheol complained
“WHO ARE YOU CALLING ALCOHOLICS?!” mingyu exclaimed looking at the opposite direction of where cheol was.
“FUCKER I DIDNT CALL YOU ANYTHING” minghao retorted to a confused mingyu facing him causing cheol to place a palm over his forehead.
“how about you start charming women for who you truly are?” vernon continuing the passed topic.
cheol didnt know if he was thankful for vernon re entering a topic, all the “seemingly” sober people joined up on the topic. they soon somehow convinced cheol to meet new people and try making them fall in love with him.
kkuma needed a mom, maybe he did too (but not in a maternal sense
“i doubt scoups can make a girl fall in love with him” dino giggled in the verge of passing out.
“i sure can ! it’s like a walk in the park” seungcheol defended.
“not even within a month” jeonghan added
“not even a week” jun stared blankly.
seungcheol always had placed his pride on a pedestal, it’s the source of his cocky behavior.
“oh please, give me 10 days it would be like she’s under a love spell” cheol snickered blanketing his bruised ego.
“deal, i bet 20 that we’ll have another meeting on the 10th day having cheol drop dead drunk at thus exact spot” jeonghan screamed only standing for the first time for the night.
it was chaos after that, but the group was almost divided equally in the process of them making bets and weighing the odds of cheol’s fate.
seungcheol wished the ground opened its jaws and buried him six feet under
even he was lying to himself with his statement, but one thing about choi seungcheol— he always wins.
“i’m gonna head home now” cheol said, he wish he didn’t.
he somehow wished that they were all too drunk to force him into the grave he dug himself. mercy will be the end of their bond, so as fate has written cheol’s fortune.
“i guess cheol is accepting his pussy title” jeonghan sighed
“i am not a pussy” cheol responded
“then i guess you’ll have to prove that” joshua sighed blankly at him
“let’s start by choosing the lucky girl who’s gonna take cheol’s v card”
“i’m not even a virgin” cheol rebutted with a frown, the liquor making him submit to his true emotions.
“please you barely lost it” dk laughed
“well i barely felt it….” cheol muttered
“let’s do her” dino pointed at the wall as he stood quickly stumbling with his head spinning
“who’s he pointing at? did he shave his eyes as well?” woozi said laughing
“shut up pink panty guy, i’m talking about the girl that has red hair and wearing a black dress” dino said laying on the floor
“ooh, she looks hot like seungcheol’s type” jun teased
if he didn’t spot your bright auburn hair he would’ve sworn to himself that these guys we’re just throwing a hate crime at him, but god, you we’re his type.
“go on mr. choi, show us your charm” mingyu pushing cheol closer to your area in the bar
you were planning on stepping up, but you had to make one thing sure, so you turned around to your friends with burgundy rushing through your cheeks with the thrill throwing you into your pit of endless thoughts.
“makeup, and outfit : perfect” yunjin started with a wide grin
“hair : gorgeous and can easily make a ponytail” karina winked as you glared at her
“teeth clean and ready for sucking” sakura smiled
jesus christ you were asking for a reality check and they just simply can’t avoid adding scandalous statements as if that’s all you do.
you were ready
were?
are?
was?
fuck.
you backed up quickly as you saw a guy charging at your direction ready to barf up on you.
quick arms catches your moving physique, as your back became dependent on the person unbeknownst to you.
two groups filled your senses with squeals, laughing and cheering waking you up from your not so cute dilemma
you turned to the person behind you seeing the man of the night
choi seungcheol.
“you okay, sweetheart?” his voiced hush, you felt warm and you swore that is was just the buzz from the liquor
quickly you went to work
“omg thankyou o-oppa” you’re voice cracked because you simply cannot believe the words that escaped your lips.
there was terror in his eyes, the moment you saw it, it went away. a pretty grin was graced upon your lips because this will be one hell of a ride
he better be sure to keep his seatbelts on because you’re gonna totally rock his world.
day 1 : the tortoise and the hare
spoiler, the hare never wins
guys hate being speedy, if they’re looking for a woman they can take home to his mom it would definitely not be the woman who wants to be dicked down after the first date.
and this wasn’t even a date
he took you to his place after your so called friends left the both of you in the landmine
he only intended you to sober up, and you only wanted him to curse you off his life. but it would be no fun if you just did it in a day, wouldn’t it?
the sound of the collision of class and marble led to both of your eyes to be met.
“thank you, really, or what else i would’ve smelled like vodka and whatever the fuck that person just ate” you sighed in relief genuinely
“no worries, you don’t smell like barf or vodka…. maybe a little of tequila but you’re good” he smiled
fuck. he’s hot and he knows it, a part of you wished that he was some sort of narcissist so you could do this thing in a easier way.
his face sculpted and graced with beauty his eyes filled with wisdom and maturity, his lips full and shaded like cherries.
you we’re definitely down to have a fling with him, but according to you, you were planning to change your ways and test the purpose and ability of men.
“mhm, i’m tired let’s watch a movie?” you smiled with your forced high-pitched voice
you love how he would hide the way his face would wince when you talk or the way his jaw slacked on your statement.
you smiled at the thought of him trying to take you out of his multi-million mansion because you were pushing boundaries he built for you
“yeah.. sure, what do you wanna watch?” he assisted you by the waist as he brought you up the stairs.
you wanted to get out, you wouldn’t think that it would go like this. fuck the boys manual maybe it doesn’t work with hot rich guys
“the notebook, i LOVE that movie” you smiled and you could see how he expected that
as you laid in his sheets, which you felt deeply sorry for actually staining his pearly and silky shits with your outside clothes, but your pride held you high. if you fell from your pride or for him then maybe then you could wash his sheets.
the room was dimly lit, the ambience warm as he intended.
he sat next to you, with distance for respect according to cheol’s brain.
you couldn’t predict him, and maybe he sends mix signals, and that made you feel less guilty because you concluded that he’s a womanizer. he knew all of these antics a little too well.
“it’s getting hot” you sighed fanning your face adjusting your dress to the right extent, you held your hair exposing your neck to him making sure he saw it.
"really? my ac is so low right now" he was surely acting oblivious.
you may be frustrated at him for not taking your hits but you guess it would make a good build up, meanwhile he was there dumbfounded from all the tricks you pulled, he was slowly getting hard but that's another story.
he was thinking if he should drop it, it seemed like you just wanted a one night stand, but speaking of the devil (angel) jeonghan sent him a text showing him how much money he would be getting if he proved them wrong.
somehow in the end all of his friends were convinced that he would stay bitchless. there was a whole chapter within their groupchat making fun of what he said earlier at the bar.
truth be told, he didn't give a fuck about the money, he wanted his dignity and pride back.
"my body is so warm because of all the shots i took though" you reasoned out quickly.
"well my body is really cool right now" he faced you slowly pulling you close but you had other plans
you quickly kissed him as if you were desperate for it.
"mmm- i think we should slow down y/n" he rushed to tell you.
you wanted to grin so bad, victory laid on your side, but you had to put a sad face asking him if he no longer likes you repeatedly as he escorted you out of his house.
you quickly twirled and skipped across the road when you were sure he was inside already. he was there though, watching through his window.
maybe he had to step up.
day 2 : the in-laws
there was not a single text on cheols phone the next morning, soon learning your phone was inside the purse you left at his house.
he wanted to scan your purse thinking of a way to sweep you off your feet today. but a gentleman doesn't mess with a ladies purse.
after the the long chat you had last night, you exchanged your details to each other which now led cheol to your apartment building with flowers and a wide smile.
"hi i got these for you-"
"wait cheollie, say hi to your mom !" you cut him off with a smile
his face quickly shifting, you what?! he was slowly shaking on the inside quickly settling down your purse, flowers on your coffee table.
"h-hi mommm" he grinned as if his mom could see him.
"seungcheol i didn't raise you to hide your partners from me like this, i really like y/n you know, so when's the wedding?" his mom ushered
"a wedding?" you gasped and started screeching as if it was real
"we'll see mom haha.." he replied deranged from the situation made just 2 minutes ago. he quickly hung up before his mom could get any more ideas.
"well that was interesting, i didn't know that you knew my mom" he restrained himself from losing himself.
"well i have to meet your parents anyways right, cheollie?" you smiled at him
"yeah, but we just met yesterday" he deadpanned
"well, you don't think we're gonna work out" you started sobbing in front of him making small obnoxious hiccups
"well that's not what i meant baby" he hushed and spent the afternoon babying you while whispering sweet nothings in your ear.
day 3 : monday flings
"i seriously cannot fathom how much patience he has to reach day 3" you genuinely lay your opinion
"i was a complete total psycho, but he must be mental" you said to yourself
"that's fucking crazy because if i had to put up with that you would never hear from me again" sakura said bluntly which bruised and praised you at the same time
"i need a break from my alter ego as well, i hope he has no plans on asking me on anything anymore at least"
the day went as if you had never met choi seungcheol at all, which made you relieved for at least having a rest day, sure it was such a short time but god how tiring it was to be somebody else
"i just really realized how to fit in somebody else's shoes" you sighed as you and your friends exited the building together ready to go home and simply pass out.
"then don't fucking wear them" karina said
"but this is the whole point, being a stereotypical woman in a relationship"
you all soon parted in your own ways as you walked through the neighborhood near yours, you realized you just walked passed by seungcheol's house and this made you walk a bit faster and try to fabricate your distinguishable looks. but guess what
"aw baby don't hide from me" he coos slowly pulling you in his embrace.
"i was just looking for you" he smiled as he rushed you into his home
you somehow wished he could just stab you right now.
he led you to his living room filled with rose petals and candles dedicating a whole playlist of his vinyl records for you. you spent the evening sharing his home cooked dinner, which was actually delicious. and he soon brought out his photo albums from when he was a kid.
"do you think our children look just like you?' your sentence made you freak out but you supressed it wanting him to be affected by your vicious visions.
"how about we go back about the marriage thing for now" he faked out a laugh.
"i want this to be our family's house too" you sighed in content while scanning the architectural structure.
"if that's what you want" he smiled and pecked your forehead, which had caught you by a surprise.
"it is" you smiled, you didn't want to admit it but something formed within you when he said that.
"i'll be having a boys night tomorrow so i might not respond quickly to your texts"
"is it strictly 'boys only' ?" you asked forming an idea and swallowing these funny feelings that have bloomed within you.
"well it had always been"
day 4 : poker night
if fate was inevitable, they should you hit you up then.
you were in a cab with your hands filled with cheol's place in mind.
"cheol having a 4 day record is worth celebrating" jeonghan teased
"it's been that long?" mingyu asked actually impressed
"i've been in a lot of relationships since college, stop making it seem like im a loser" he sighed
"probably just in college" minghao retorted
"it's probably going well, maybe next year she could meet his parents" seungkwan noted
"please, she met them the second day we met" cheol answered scoffing at the thought
"now i know why girls are driven away from you" jun cringed at cheol
"she called them herself the day we met, she even said that our children will live here, and she tried to sleep with me the first day we met !" cheol finally shared his experience the past few days
"ooh feisty and a woman with a plan, that's so horanghae coded" hoshi smiled reaching his palms out and curling the ends of her fingers.
"you're going delusional again hamster" minghao smacked the back of hoshi's head causing the latter to relieve it by rubbing his head.
"maybe cheol could get laid now with her bold behavior, someone who can tame mr. pride-over-pants-down-choi-seungcheol over here" joshua said
"she's just a bet-"
the violent reactions that flashed through the faces of his group-mainly cheol when you came in the door in the middle of the game.
the guys quickly recovered teasing cheol for being so attached already calling her over for a boys night.
"hi guys!!" you said excitingly trying on your best cute expression you could muster up while hoshi replied to you with the horanghae pose as you quickly reciprocated it.
"i just thought i could put some of my stuff here so you could always remember me cheollie" your eyes twitching the moment your face was parallel with the wall
cheol was in awe with the first few vases you put out, until there were at lest 13 in his living room only. his house looking like he was out there selling urns
you were going around his place disrupting them, even changing their ambient music into some of britney spear's playlist
and even making very concerning screams around the kitchen just behind the living room.
"cheollie, can you get me some water" you whined when you heard them telling cheol it was his turn
he caught you reaching out unto the cupboards for a glass, he quickly got you what you requested and leaving you there
you were quick to grab onto his arm and grab the cigarette out of his mouth.
"you need to stop smoking" you tell him genuinely, his demeanor sensing your honesty his brows rested as he gave you a smile.
"i need to keep my lungs healthy for our children huh?" he teased you with a knowing smile
day 5 : ghosting
after his game with the boys, you two spent so much time together after.
he was being sulky after receiving his first losing game last night from all your disruptions last night.
but he never mentioned you being a nuisance, and just maybe because it was stored somewhere deep his chest the frustrations he held
but you stayed clingy to him filling him up with your presence even when you already went home flooding his texts until it was dawn
today you decided to stay low, you were lying in wait in this part of the plan
by doing so much the past few days today you decided to give ghosting a shot
"god i just wanna die if i need to go through this just to find a decent human being" you sighed frustrated at yourself
you wish you could stop now, there was 150 bucks on the line
or this is what you thought that hindered from you from stopping, you stared longingly on your laptop
quickly dialing his number you grinned at the sound of his voice
day 6 : a large iced diet coke and a kiss to go
today you planned on watching a knicks game with cheol, it was both your favorite thing to watch.
the stadium filled with cheers as you were shaking with thrill watching the tight game among your favorite team handling each other by the neck
most of the game went well according to cheol
during the break the venue managers continued to do the kiss cam.
you were interested looking at random people sharing affection through this stupid camera. but you didn't know it would face you.
you saw your face light up with surprise as the other guy next to you exposed on the kiss cam
you were looking at him
"i'm-" the guy was cut off when seungcheol grabbed you by the nape sealing your lips with his plush ones, the camera then panning to the both of you instead of you and the other guy.
"you weren't in the kiss cam" you said smiling- wait no don't.
"well i was just now" he said cockily
"i'm not gonna let you kiss him when i'm here" he said and that lit a fire within you
the final part of the game resumed as you both were cheering wildly through the crowds
it was time.
you asked cheol to bring you coke since you were extremely famished according to your words.
cheol quickly glanced at you, the bottom of the stadium, on the scoreboard, and back to your eyes.
he quickly ran getting you the drink that you wanted.
"i cant drink too much sugar though i need the diet one" his face turning into a distressed one jogging back up the long steep flights of stairs as he huffed to the vendor that you wanted the coke one, being only available to watch the game through the small monitor by the ceiling
there was about 3 minutes left, your team still having time to win over
he rushed back to you quickly handing you your coke, but there was another thing-
"i need ice cheollie" you whined at him, he groaned but still went over to do it
only a few moments left before the game ends the vendor still working on you precious drink, seungcheol staring at the monitor.
you felt bad, like actually. but you had to keep this up
you were enjoying the game until you were drowned in your thoughts on how you were ever gonna ask for his forgiveness after all this
you were a bitch and get over your act.
the crowd calling out through your ears realizing your favored team won, you had to force a smile especially a lovely one at cheol to make him think you were being a menace
maybe if you pushed him enough you could end this sooner, you can't admit that he was charming, handsome, and his behavior is no less than how a gentleman should act.
sorry coups.
the game ended, you were exiting the venue with cheol as his arm around your shoulder quickly calling you a cab home.
"thank you for this babe" you smiled passing him the cup, hoping you were rude enough for him to not call you up anymore
"no problem, you gave me your other ticket to watch with you anyway" he smiled pecking you before you left.
he crumpled the cup and threw it away.
day 7 : the revelation
you and cheol spent this day with a quick breakfast by the small cafe nearby, chatting through the busy streets of your city, he asked you to come to his event tomorrow which you accepted. after breakfast there were barely any interactions coming between the two of you.
why stay through this conditions?
well we bring you to the day 1
you were troubled writing your new article on the magazine company you were working for.
your boss expecting so much from you, you simply cannot write anything too political or anything controversial at all, so you stuck on to writing these stupid "how to" to articles which was a huge success for your company.
you were stuck, nothing to write, drafts filled with calling out peace for all countries experiencing genocide and territorial invasions or calling out to politicians who were legitimately caught only on scandalous events but never the seat of any meetings.
you were a writer a "how to girl", you swore you did it all and wrote them, how to talk your way out of a ticket, how to feng shui your apartment and even having those little tests you wrote printed by the magazine.
seungcheol was a lawyer, he stayed in his grandfathers law firm, his grandfather desperate for him to get wed and have a family who will take care of the firm and would take care of him as well.
seungcheol's grandfather knew his luck in love, so he prayed that even when he passes, his grandson will still have someone to be with.
day 8 : pride over love
cheol came over to your place at dusk seeing you with your flattering yellow dress with a backless cut on the back.
he was stunned by your beauty, his hand leading to his chest.
"my god" he whispered to himself as he paced closer to you
"you're gorgeous" he smiled as he kissed your temple
"you don't look to bad yourself" you grinned at him
you decided to stay in your apartment for a while as you settled a few of your stuff before you leave
he glanced over your record player and fidget over your albums then he finally sat down digesting the whole essence of your place, it was hard for him to stay still thinking that you were some dumb bet but he knew you were more than that, he knew you we're attractive but the breeze tonight was only revealing your true selves to each other.
you came in the room with your purse settling it by the coffee table as your favorite song came by, you couldn't help but singing along to it
and other girls dreamed that they'd be cheol's partner
they'd be cheol's partner and
you're so vain
you probably think this song is about you
and then you both exploded in to giggles proceeding to do silly dances before heading out.
you both arrive at an immaculately decorated building, you could already hear all the people chattering inside the building making a light buzz on your ears
"cheol, you should come meet our new stockholder" his coworker ushered him as he looked at you with slight worry
"i'll be fine you should go" you pushed him lightly and he just nodded at you making a phone call sign telling u to call him if anything happens
it was a while when you were just sitting by the bar drinking your nth drink for the night, it wasn't your intention to do so, but that was the only thing that can occupy you. you didn't want to bother cheol on his night so you stayed lowkey.
you weren't drunk but you rethink because you didn't know why seungcheol's grandfather ushering you to talk to him.
"so i heard that you have been seeing my grandson" he started
"oh yeah i am" you politely answered, guilt wrapping you up when you realized that you were only feigning everything.
"i'm glad that he told me about a girl he goes out with, he barely tells me anymore because they don't last long" he giggled
"oh really? i would expect him to be married by now actually" you joked with him
you felt comfortable around him, his friends, his relatives, and even his co workers, they really provided you with a nice environment.
"i'm happy that you stayed with him even after knowing that you just started as a bet-"
"excuse me?" you were violated.
"i mean please excuse me i need to get some fresh air"
there was regret in mr.choi's face but it also held worry, was it true? you were a bet? what did he win for you? for this? what did he mean that you started as a bet?
you were furious, you knew you were also doing him wrong, but you felt bad for all of it.
it wasn't helping that you had to admit to yourself that you did like him. even through the fucked up situations you had this week, it was all messed up, fake.
but even in all that chaos, he was consistent, he was there.
now you're doubting if that was his acting as well
because now you were burning everywhere, because you knew you crossed the fine line along the feigned adoration over real devotion.
you adore choi seungcheol.
but now that meant nothing.
quick and heavy foot steps were heard behind you
"y/n!" cheol managed out with huffed breaths
you faced him with disdain painting your face.
“wow, you’re gonna run away after you defy me?” he laughed sarcastically, his face sullen his eyes filled with fury
“defy you? what about you making me a bet?” it dawned on him realizing that you knew about his faults too.
it was true, you did defy him, not that it was your choice, you had to do it for your job, you wrote about him, one of your how-to blog and magazine experiments.
how to lose a guy in 10 days
this was your last project being a part of this magazine line. you swore you couldn’t keep on using people for an article, you planned on being a journalist after quitting, after making him your last.
because after all, you love him.
your article could also be called “how to stupidly fall in love and find a man in 10 days”
“it was a bet at first, then i fell, but you just played me” he looked at you as if you just stabbed him straight to the chest
“what?” you said confused
“leave. i don’t ever wanna see you anymore” he warned
“didn’t know you could stoop so low, and don’t worry i will”
“how to lose a guy in 10 days huh?” he started “lucky you y/n because you just lost him” he uttered walking away.
the night turned completely upside down, both of your chests swelled with guilt, shame and anger.
your heart dropped, but you just swallowed you pride and left.
day 9 : drive me out of town
quickly packing your things to leave, you won’t do any good here now that everything is tainted by the man you met just a little more than a week ago.
you spent your whole day just wallowing the sadness from your love life leaving your friends, your apartment.
you published that article about choi seungcheol to have income before you left your low life and start as a struggling journalist to do what you always wanted, to write about more important things
conventional, innovative, a cry of the oppressed.
but people seemed to worry if blondes were more fun than brunettes.
you truly regret using him, but you both did the wrong things to the write people, only fate knew that.
you rode your cab ready to leave this damned city to move to another identical one.
the familiar streets slowly blurred into the abyss of the distance as you called your friends and relatives one by one just catching up and telling them little life updates.
you were sad, but you knew that seungcheol is probably feeling a lot more than you were.
the darkness of the sky basked you a sense of comfort, there’s always a new day.
you wished him peace.
it was a fault writing about him and confessing about you felt at the same time, but he deserved the last bit if honesty left to your fake situationship.
a raging motorcycle suddenly honks at your vehicle endlessly. your cab giving way but it seemed like it wasn’t what the motor rider meant
“OH MY GOD PLEASE STOP” you told the cab driver when you realized it was cheol’s bike.
was he planning to run you over?
you got out displaying yourself in front of the man you loved.
“y/n, it was all true” he said taking his helmet off he huffed tiredly but not slowing down his pace to get close to you
“what are you saying?”
“i liked you that’s why i agreed with the bet, hoping you would like me back, even though your personality was hard to work with” he laughed to himself
“why are you saying this? why now?”
“maybe i flipped the page too quick not seeing that you loved me as well”
“love”
“what?”
“i still love you” you whispered
“you won your bet a little too well mr.choi seungcheol”
“i love you too, and i don’t care if you pull your annoying your girl antics i still love you”
“that wasn’t me” you laughed
“well there was a part of you who did it, and i love all of you” he smiled showing his gummy grin.
you couldn’t help but feel free, you weren’t stuck in that annoying girl’s body forcing the guy you love to hate you.
“kiss me, cheol” you teared up
he didn’t need to be told twice as he rushed to close the distance between the two of you, his lips crashing to yours savoring every inch of it. your head shifting in sync as you both connected not wanting to let go.
today’s day 1. the first day of making it real.
day 10 : my heart, it lies within yours.
passed 12 am
i guess you did actually lose your bet now with your friends. at day 10 choi seungcheol was plush against your skin his lips in yours, and your hands in his hair.
“i hate that you have me wrapped around your finger” he groaned onto your lips
“i hate that you actually won your stupid bet” you sighed
“i always win, and this feels so much better than winning” he said lifting you
your bags left on the floor the moment you reached his home, he told you to call it yours as well, from now on.
your silence didn’t last long when the both of you were longing for each other leading you up to this moment.
“hm so cocky huh?” you teased him as you started kissing down on his neck as he laid you on his bed.
you pulled down on his tie realizing he was so busy at work all day.
you kissed him once more and switching the positions that you were previously on as you climbed onto his lap and continued making out
your hands wandering on his hair and his hands on your ass.
your tongue interacting as he let you do whatever you want, his hands started wandering on your body leaving your skin burning for more.
your kiss being more needy as you started to grind on his hard on. he groaned onto your lips leaving you to grind harder.
you started to unbutton his clothes as he followed suit, removing yours as well.
he was pulling on his tie
“no” you stopped him
“keep it on love” you commanded
he could throw you and turn this around, but he didn’t. he enjoyed this a little too much, loving the feeling of being taken care of.
you both were left on your under garments except him having his tie on
he looked so hot having his tie rest on his smooth and hard muscles, his abs and pecs shining from the moonlight.
you continued grinding on him until he held your hips to stop.
“let me have you first please” he sighed as he laid you down on the bed as he knelt on the ground facing your crotch.
he looked at you as if he was asking if he could remove it and you nodded back at him.
his blonde hair a bit messy as you caressed it and tugging while he was removing your underwear
his face getting closer to your heat as he started kissing on your thighs slowly.
his lips then met with your clit as he sucked slowly then proceeding to lap on your entrance already making it soaking than it already was.
his tongue bending slightly when met with the entrance teasing it and slowly stretching it.
his right hand caressing around your waist as the left one kept it on your thigh refraining it from moving.
his fingers slowly worked his mouth as he slowly dipped one into your hole.
his finger was thick, 2 of your fingers were your frequently used ones, but his reached so much deeper, felt so fuller.
he hummed against your clit as vibrations flooded through your veins. he added another finger making you writhe and pull on his hair more.
you pulled him up kissing his plump lips before making him lay down on the bed.
you held his hands as you put it above his head, you weren’t intending to restrain them at all.
his biceps protruding so well when you raised it keeping it there as you licked and sucked on his neck slowly removing his boxers.
you wanted to cum with him tonight.
his eyes went dark seeing his large dick lining up to your entrance, he wanted you to ride him, he wanted to stare at your beautiful body while you felt pleasure because of him.
"no condom?" he asked heavily, he wanted it, he wanted this, but he also wants to make sure that you're doing what you desire, not wanting to make regrets again.
"i don't care, fill me up, make me pregnant" you said in a daze, but even without the lust you had right now, you still would say yes.
"fuck" he groaned hearing your words
his length standing tall, he was already so girthy, his tip leaking red.
he wanted to feel pleasure with you, not just sitting there like some fuck doll.
you lined the tip with your entrance as you slowly sunk down already feeling an enormous stretch.
"god your cock is so big" you moaned as you rested your head by his neck sucking there to distract yourself from the slight pain.
his hands went down to your waist as he pushed you further, taking him all in.
he was sent to paradise with your walls crashing to his length, engulfing it in its warmth
"your pussy was made just for me, love" he groaned as his hands guided your waist to ride him.
you were releasing moans as you rode him, it's as if he was still getting bigger inside you.
you then leaned back to your position staring at him with his tie, he looked so hot with his abs clenching every time you squeeze his dick, and how his sweat made it look like he was glowing.
he was laying back with the most drunk in lust face he got as he bit his lower lip just staring at you bouncing at him.
every curve of him filled you even more hitting the right spots that led you to your high in a few more moments.
you both released at the same time, but cheol was far from over with you
he flipped you around entering you in a missionary position, he was truly strong as he pumped himself in you with a new found energy hitting even deeper than before.
he caressed the bump his dick made deep on your stomach.
he made a guttural moan just by the thought of you being able to carry his children by the very belly he's fucking oblivion to.
you pulled onto his tie causing it to tighten a bit that he moaned. you kissed him sloppily as your saliva mixed and dripped to the side of your chin.
he went down leaving marks on your delicate skin, already having red marks on your neck, he made sure to give your tits some love.
he sucked onto your left one and massaged the one on your right, continuously flicking it. his other hand made its way to massage your clit, which made your back arch and scream his name.
"fuck seungcheol" you moaned
"seungcheol? i thought you called me cheollie" he smiled at you with a shit eating grin
you could barely even give a response, you were simply brain dead from all the pleasure you had.
his pace going faster and faster as massaged your clit to a higher intensity, you both were sent over the edge for the second time tonight.
he slowly removed his length, as your hole felt the emptiness you groaned. your mixed arousal slipping out of your pussy as cheol just stared at it.
he inserted two fingers fucking the cum back into her, you moaned at overstimulation, he continued fucking you with his fingers.
"aren't you doing too much mr. choi?" you glared at seungcheol.
"gonna make sure you keep all of it" he said as she shakes his head giggling.
you pulled him down onto the bed as you sat up stuffing your underwear in his mouth making him moan out loud.
"your turn?" you grinned.
i felt like i could do better :") im sorry if this is bad.
taglist <3
@luchiet @sebongmochi @yawnseu @christinewithluv @musingsofananxiouspotato @raggedypansexual @90s-belladonna @nerdycheol @xcynthiaaa @inexistent-bluemind @jenoxygen @i-dont-give-a-fok @nmosyne @sleepzyy @justanarchiveforfics @springdaybreaks @k07-1313 @dunixxd
#seventeen x reader#seventeen#seventeen oneshot#seventeen imagines#seventeen x you#seventeen fic#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#seungcheol svt#seungcheol x reader#seventeen smut#seventeen fluff#seungcheol smut#scoups x reader#scoups fluff#scoups scenarios#scoups#svt scoups#scoups smut#svt x reader#svt imagines#svt smut#svt fluff#svt#svthub#svt fanfic
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Trailer Park Steve AU part 3
part 1 | part 2
(tw: guns, accidental death)
Robin’s already in full panic mode by the time Steve pulls up to her place, flinging the passenger door open and throwing herself into the car with so much force that the car bounces on its wheels a little. “Drive!!”
“Jesus Christ, good morning to you, too.”
“Steve!”
Steve starts to drive.
Beside him, Robin flips the visor down to look at her reflection; groans and scrubs her hands down her face in misery at whatever she sees. Steve doesn’t really get it. He thinks she looks beautiful, with her hair gently moving in the breeze from the open window, with her freckles lit up by the early morning sun.
“Ugh,” she says, turning to look at him, “I can’t believe I look like a zombie and you’re gonna make me late to the first day of school.”
“Wow.” Fuckin’ ingrate. And when he was just being so nice to her in his head. “How about a thank you, huh? ‘Thanks for picking me up, Steve. Thanks for bringing my backpack, Steve. Sorry you almost got shanked by your neighbor, Steve.’”
“You what???”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Um, yes it very much does matter, what the—”
“—I’m just saying, a little gratitude? Wouldn’t hurt you.”
He licks at the corner of his mouth, spritzes wiper fluid to clear the bugs off the windshield. Robin’s eyes are bulging out of her head, but he really doesn’t want to talk about how he still feels the ghost press of steel against his throat, so: “You’re not even right, by the way; I don’t know why you’re complaining.”
“Huh?”
“School started yesterday. I’m making you late for the second day of school.”
“Yesss,” she draws the word out like he’s stupid, rolling her wrist in a hurry up and get it motion, “but everyone knows that syllabus day doesn’t count. The first pep rally is the real first day of school.”
Ah, there it is.
Steve steals another peek at his best friend while they’re on a straightaway, notes the nervous twitch of her hands as she goes back to fussing at her reflection; the way she’s clumping her lashes together with seven coats too many of some drugstore brand mascara. She’s wearing lipstick. “This is about Vick—”
“—Don’t talk about—”
“—It’s about Vickie, isn’t it?”
“Ughhhhh.” Robin folds forward and thunks her head against the dash. “Fine, okay? Fine! Yes! This may have something to do with a distressingly cute fellow marching band member. Are you happy now?”
“Ecstatic.”
“Oooh, big word for you, Steven.” She swats him on the shoulder, face all twisted up in offense. “Stop laughing!”
“Stop hitting me,” he laughs. “I’ll dump your ass out on this highway.”
She gasps and narrows her eyes at him. “You wouldn’t.”
Steve eases his foot onto the brake.
“Okay, okay! Mercy! I’m being an asshole, alright? I’m sorry. I’m just— I’m stressed! Being gay is very stressful.”
The knife incident pops back into his mind. “Yeah,” he mutters, “I imagine it is.”
—
He catches himself slouching down into his seat a bit when they pull up to the school. Has to force himself to sit upright, hears his mother’s tutting in his ear about bad posture and the message it projects to the world.
It’s not that he’s embarrassed to be here; really, he isn’t. He’s just hoping to avoid being spotted by the nuggets now that they go here, too, lest he be accosted for evading his chauffeur duties.
God.
Dustin’s nerd shit is infecting his brain.
Robin grabs her bag out of the back seat, plants a parting peck on Steve’s cheek as she gets out of the car. “See you later?”
“Yeah, I’ll pick you up for work.”
“Love you, dingus.”
And then he’s alone again.
With Robin gone, Steve finds himself driving. Wandering and aimless, like a ghost who doesn’t know he’s gone. It’s not like he has nothing to do — he’s supposed to be out finding a second job, finding a way to support himself and his mom, because he’s the man of the house now. Because his life has turned into one of those shitty, overcomplicated word problems from math class.
If a recently widowed mother works no hours and her minimum-wage son works as many as Family Video will allow, how much mold-riddled dogshit housing can they afford?
Not much.
Inevitably, he finds himself circling the scorched bones of Starcourt, driving tired loops around the barbed wire perimeter. His ghost likes to guide him here; can’t shake the place where he shook off the mortal coil.
He didn’t know it at the time, but Steve Harrington died the day the mall burned down. Embarrassing, to not hear the death knell as his family name went up in smoke.
It was hard to hear much at all that night, between the concussion and the fireworks and the shrieking of a monster being torn apart, but the memory caresses his mind now in cruel whispers: the headrush of victory; the blood and the sweat; the relief that they’d won, they’d done it, it’s over, they won.
Steve tugs at his bad ear ‘til the ringing subsides.
Some fucking grand prize.
The thing is, you can’t go around exploding an eldritch horror without alerting the US government, and the US government can’t go around letting major investors in a hostile commie invasion keep their assets once they find out about their treasonous schemes. It happened fast: the arrest, the bail, the impending trial and the seizure of property. Richard Harrington was once a small town god on an invisible throne, making deals with devils in shadowy boardrooms, and suddenly he was looking at life in a cell.
Maybe it was a blessing he died before his reckoning was due. Maybe it was no accident at all.
The second, and perhaps more important, thing is: stray bullets don’t care about your looming court date.
Dad had a habit of cleaning his guns while he was drunk, nursing a whiskey in one hand while he polished the gleaming barrels with the other. Pointless, really, because the guns were always pristine to begin with. Dick Harrington didn’t hunt. Didn’t shoot. Claimed the pistol was for home defense, that he kept it loaded in case anyone ever tried to hurt his family, but Steve knew the truth.
His dad just liked to flirt with death. Liked to handle pretty, deadly things, stroke his fingers over ruthless metal and feel the rush of power when he walked away unscathed.
He didn’t walk away that night.
Didn’t even face death standing.
Sliced through his femoral artery and rolled right out of his chair.
They found him lying on the ground in a dark, sticky puddle, gasping like a fish as blood spurted from his thigh. Crazy how fast it happened. Steve had been in his room when the shot rang out, and he barely managed to reach the bottom of the stairs before the gurgling noises stopped. Just boom! whizz! bang! and Dick Harrington was gone.
Maybe it’s a good thing, too, that they lost the house.
The image of his mother in the hallway that night — shellshocked in the doorway, one pale hand shaking in front of her open mouth, features wide and wet with waking horror as she stared into the room — was enough to make him never want to step foot in the place again.
So now they live in a rundown piece of shit on the wrong side of town, with hideous burnt orange carpet and wood paneled walls, with cracks in the ceiling and cigarette burns in the walls, some parting gifts from whatever feral hick lived there before them, and it feels like another cruel, cosmic joke. Like the universe is delighting in the Harringtons’ comeuppance; like the blackened beams and brick rubble of Starcourt are all twisting to form one great, mocking mouth; the better to smile and laugh at their misfortune.
You bought your bed, now you have to lie in it.
He didn’t even know that the Harringtons owned Forest Hills until it was the only asset left to their name.
He’s pretty sure his dad bought it more as a joke than a genuine investment. Meant to teach Steve a lesson, like how he used to bring home Waffle House applications whenever Steve got a C on a report card. This is your future if you don’t straighten up, son.
Kill yourself, dad.
Oh, wait.
You already did.
—
part 4
#trailer park steve au#steve harrington#robin buckley#platonic stobin#eddie munson#steddie#steddie fic#my writing#my fic#tw: guns#tw: death
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spencer reid x student!reader
18+! this post contains nsfw content
when spencer gets home from work he finds that you haven’t finished your essay, so he tries to ease your mind.
content: lots of pet names, fem!reader, you’re getting an arts degree lol, age gap but not too intense since this is early-ish seasons spencer, slight degradation at the end, reader orgasm, oral and fingering (r! receives), overstim, forced orgasm.
(i’m literally gay but i’ve been so delusional and in love with this fictional man lately i had to write something to get it out of my system!!!)
—
when your boyfriend came home from work, tie loose and satchel abandoned on the kitchen counter, you felt a wave of embarrassment flush you. you were still working on the same essay you had been last night; the one spencer made you promise you’d finish today.
“how is my pretty girl?” he asked, laying back beside you on the couch. when he leaned over to kiss you chastely, your stomach churned and you shut your laptop quickly.
you could feel hot tears start to pool in your eyes, biting back the sob you so desperately needed to get out. spencer took one look at your face and sighed, wrapping an arm around you.
“oh, baby. you didn’t finish it?”
“i tried!” you protested, your eyes squeezed shut to avoid seeing his disappointed face. “please don’t be mad at me.”
spencer’s gentle hand cupped your cheek, running his thumb across it lightly. “look at me, angel. i’m not mad.”
the floodgates opened when you finally dared to look at him, seeing his mouth pressed in a flattened line. tears streaked your face and it only added to the embarrassment. your boyfriend was a capable man, and here you were crying because you couldn’t finish a stupid essay before he got home from his 9-to-5.
he tried to hold you closer, but you struggled against him. you didn’t deserve his comfort or his sympathy. he settled for running his free hand through your hair soothingly. “hey, just talk to me. what went wrong, can i help?”
you shook your head, fighting through a hiccupped sob to answer. “i couldn’t find the last source i need. i was sifting through articles for like four hours, and i just gave up.”
ever the problem solver, spencer smiled down at you softly. “okay, let me take a look. you know i have fairly good research skills, they’re kinda required for my job.”
“you don’t get it!” you huffed, frustration evident in your voice. “you go to work all day and i can’t even find one source. one! i shouldn’t need your help for everything.”
recognition flashed in his eyes, and then he really pulled you in. it was useless to relent, you could feel the determination in his touch. he shushed you softly, one hand wrapped around you firmly while the other drew patterns on your back. when your breaths slowed and your sobs subsided, he pulled back to hold you at arms’ length. “baby, you are one of the smartest people i know.”
you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, and spencer grabbed your chin to ensure you couldn’t look away.
“i wouldn’t lie. no one i know is as sensitive as you are, as empathetic and in touch with their emotions. that’s what makes you so good at this program. i certainly couldn’t complete your degree.”
and you knew how bad at concealing the truth your boyfriend was, so reluctantly you believed him. “thank you,” you just about whispered.
his eyes cast pure adoration on you, even as your tear-stained cheeks were red and raw. “your incredible brain is one of the reasons i fell in love with you. so if you can’t find anything, there must be a reason. could you please just let me take a look?”
spencer had indisputably won you over, one arm still holding you to his side as he opened your laptop on his own lap. you relaxed into him, head pressed to his chest where you could hear his heart beating perfectly. with a hum, he scanned your tabs in a matter of seconds, scrolling to the bottom of the search result page at a speed the computer could barely keep up with. “i know what it is, but you’re not going to be happy.”
lifting your head, you squinted at your boyfriend inquisitively.
“you were typing the date wrong, honey. the last two numbers were flipped.”
you felt that feeling of incapability rush through you again, your eyes stinging in preparation to cry. but spencer was right there to prevent you from shutting down, hand on your head passing slow strokes in comfort.
his lips hitched into a small sympathetic smile when he looked down at you. “my poor girl, worked yourself up so hard your brain stopped working. too much essay writing this week.”
and of course, he was right. you’d been running yourself ragged recently trying to keep up with deadlines, not to mention the extra work you’d taken on early to prevent overwhelm for finals. when you’d told him your plan, spencer had advised against it. he didn’t want you sacrificing your sanity now for a bit more time with your boyfriend in a few months. but never not supportive, he relented and instead helped you draft a schedule to complete everything.
you couldn’t feel too stupid with spencer’s sweet voice telling you that you weren’t. “it’s not even due until next week, remember? i just wanted you to finish it tonight so i could take you out to dinner,” he confided sheepishly. “you’ve been working so hard, i wanted to reward you.”
despite knowing it was physically impossible (as spencer reminded you often), you could feel your heart swell from the overwhelming love you felt for your boyfriend. you pecked kisses all over his face incessantly until he swatted you away, blushing crimson from the unexpected affection. “okay, where are we going?”
spencer hummed mischievously in faux thought, tucking your wild hairs back from your face. “you didn’t finish your essay, so i actually think it’s only fair to punish you. at least before i take you out anyway.”
a heat bloomed in you, both in your cheeks and between your legs. it was rare that your boyfriend was anything but tooth-achingly sweet with you, saving his more dominant side for certain circumstances. apparently this was one of them. “oh, really? how are you gonna punish me, sir?”
he pulled you into his lap, mouth finding your neck immediately. “if you’re going to be stupid, i might as well treat you like you are. i know how much you like it when i call you a dumb slut, despite the fact that we’re both aware of how intelligent you are.”
your core ached with need, fluttering at his words. “that’s kinda fucked up, huh? i shouldn’t want that.”
“actually, it’s fairly common, especially for women with a high amount of stress in their everyday lives. most people enjoy some form of degradation and or praise when having sex.”
“spencer,” you groaned. his beautiful brain always had to get in the way of the fun, not that you seriously minded.
he smiled, pressing his lips to yours again. “sorry, baby. yes, it makes you a very naughty girl.”
despite the pure love in his eyes and his touch, you felt a pang of arousal when he degraded you. it felt good to be demeaned by someone who thought so highly of you. so you let him pin you against the couch, clothes long forgotten, and relished in his nasty words as he sunk to his knees before you.
your laptop was somewhere on the ground, still open to that unfinished document. but it was the last thing on your mind when you felt spencer’s mouth trailing down your front. his fingers hooked your panties, pulling them down with a string of arousal attached. “fuck,” he grumbled. “you are a little slut, aren’t you?”
you struggled to respond as his fingers passed through your folds, thumb toying with your clit lightly. “mhm, yours.”
“that’s right, baby.” all of the showy dominance dropped for a second when he smiled up at you, that familiar twinkle of passion in his eyes. and then he ate you out.
all you could do was grip the bedsheets, small whines leaving you each time he ran his tongue roughly up your clit. he’d take a moment to kiss your inner thighs, slipping two fingers inside to hit that sweet spot when he wasn’t lavishing it with his mouth. it wasn’t long before you were on the edge, feeling the knot snap in your stomach. with a start, you gasped through your orgasm, spencer’s hand finding yours to soothingly stroke his thumb across your knuckles. but as your breaths slowed, he didn’t.
“spence, i’m done,” you panted, hand gripping his hair.
“no you’re not.”
with a roll of your eyes, you tried to pull your hips away to no avail. his fingers were still pumping into you at a relentless pace. his head raised to meet your eyes, slick across his lips. he looked wild like this, disheveled, so different from your normal boyfriend, who was almost too sweet for his own good. “i told you this was a punishment.”
even knelt between your legs, this spencer was in complete control. his gaze was locked on yours, watching every tiny movement when he skimmed his thumb across your clit again. your core reignited when you realized what was going on. he was going to force you to cum again.
“please, too much” you whined, free hand pushing the top of his head away in a superficial effort. you couldn’t think properly with the intensity of the overstimulation.
spencer licked his lips, voice gravelly in a tone it only reached when he was purely aroused. “you can take it, honey. i know you can be a good girl for me. don’t you wanna be good?”
you nodded silently. there wasn’t much you could do but let him fuck you stupid.
“that’s it. gonna make you dumb, yeah? i’m gonna fuck you until you can’t think.” his head dipped down, resuming his wet, sloppy kisses to your clit. and with the combined effects of his words and actions, you were cumming again quickly.
you were unabashedly moaning now, jaw slacked open and eyes screwed shut. you were far past the point of caring what you looked like to the man furiously devouring you between your legs. your hand gripped his tighter, feeling his fingers pound a bit harder in acknowledgment.
your second orgasm felt like being catapulted into the atmosphere. it was sharper, practically knocking the air from your lungs. it took you a few moments to stop panting.
spencer grinned up at you, a sight for sore eyes in your clouded vision. “thinking about anything, baby?” he asked. and when he only received a small shake of your head, “good.”
his mouth returned to your core, soft kitten licks causing you to twitch and wince away. he squeezed your hand firmly, giving you a stern look. “only cleaning you up this time, promise.”
once you weren’t dripping arousal down your thighs, spencer pulled you onto him when he sat back down on the couch. all you could focus on were his warm, strong hands tracing sequences on your skin. he loved to imagine binary code, mapping it out on you because he knew the motion calmed you down.
you were barely conscious, brain buzzing like tv static in the post-sex bliss. you heard spencer chuckle to himself before saying, “so i think we’re getting takeout.”
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#molly’s!#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid imagine#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid smut
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ellie headcanons pt.3,,,!!
warnings: mentions of boobs, ass (lmao) , mild sexual content, use of the d-slur (jokingly)
content: loser!ellie x reader :3 my pookieeee
authors note: these r actually my favorite things to write ever like im so glad yall like them :333
pt. 2. taglist!!! masterlist!!!!
☆ REALLY likes beef jerky. she’ll just sit there and chew…
- her hands r just constantly freezing. like DEAD PERSON COLD ITS SCARYYYY!!! she definitely uses ur boobs as handwarmers and its JARRING because her hands are actually so cold 😞😞!!!
- HER FEET TOO!!! she has some sort of circulation issues bc you’ll be in bed together and she’ll put her feet on you and you’ll just turn into a cartoon ice cube 😕😕
- the SECOND u have some sort of drama she is seated. like she is so MESSY she will talk shit abt someone she knows absolutely nothing abt just bc u don’t like them. anyone you hate she hates 💪🏽💪🏽
- speaking of she is literally so sassy 😞😞 like she will literally full body turn away from you and look at the window while you drive if she’s mad at you.
- every time you say something even remotely sexual she’s looking at you like 🤨 and trying not to laugh. if you texted her “im coming” she’d burst out laughing and write back like “geez we’re just going to the zoo…didn’t know u were THAT excited”
- has the humor of a middle school boy. she has an actual problem w deez nuts jokes 😞😞 she thinks its SOOOO FUNNY to give u fake backshots whenever you bend over around her. fake moans and everything 💔💔
- a pharb AND a barb. she definitely knows all of super bass by heart, and she knows how to play savior complex on the guitar. duality of women!!!
- every time you say something nice to her she’s like “ew thats gay” and then she gets upset when u get upset for it 😞 so RUDE actually!!!
- really likes doing facemasks with you because you always put them on for her, and because you look really stupid with them on.
- this video. js this whole video like!!! she definitely has that dinosaur hand sanitizer AND that backpack!!
- likes rings cuz she thinks they make her look cool, but she literally cannot keep them for more than a month. they get lost SO EASILY!!!
- knows a concerning amount of things about the roman empire.
- definitely saw the barbie movie with you, and got so embarrassed at the ken guitar scene ☹️ “do i do that??” and you had to hold back laughter and tell her no
- if you have little siblings, they LOVE HER. she is so good with kids its insane. she would definitely do the griddy w ur little brother and you would NEVER let her live it down
- if you take her to a family gathering, she’s either talking with your uncles or hanging out with your younger cousins. she’s scared of your cousins your age bc they’re “cool like you”
- definitely bought you lego flowers at one point and sat on the floor and built them with you
- has those glow-in-the-dark stars on her bedroom ceiling
- would absolutely lick your salt lamp “for science”
- one time you put her hair in pigtails and she wore it the whole day, and refused to let her friends make fun of it cuz her “wife” did them
- talks about you like a 40 year old man talks about his wife. “gotta get home to the wife” definitely has “happy wife happy life!” on a tshirt
- built the two of you a house on minecraft and put your beds next to each otherrrr :((
- carved your name on her skateboard and guitar
- had an AWFUL emo phase in middle school. terrible. was absolutely an avid tumblr user
- such a nerd about vinyls. would take u on dates to her favorite vinyl store, and buy you a new vinyl player because “yours damages your vinyls, and the audio quality is shit” (you randomly bought it on amazon)
- just knows so many facts…about things…. like she’s always talking to you like “oh my god babe did you know that-“
- would get “jealous” of your pets whenever you’d pet them or hold them in front of her. just going up to your cat like “she likes me more than you”
- made herself one of those “i love my girlfriend” tshirts with your face on it
- your dad definitely loves her because they have so much in common. grilling, fishing,camping, she’s like the ultimate dad-dyke
- can fall asleep ANYWHERE. like the second she’s tired she’s just 😴😴 and she’s definitely using you as a pillow
- one time the two of you went to a family party and you found her asleep on two folded chairs
- you’re her wallpaper on all her devices.
- every time you ask her what she’s doing and she’s playing guitar shes like “just fingering my guitar”. she thinks its SOOOO HILARIOUS
- definitely says white ppl shit all the time on accident . one time she said “lets rock and roll” when you two were going somewhere and she literally didn’t talk for 5 minutes cuz you could not stop laughing
- LOVES burts bees !!! her lips always taste like their strawberry chapstick and its wonderful
- has a pair of lightning mcqueen crocs
- LOVESSSS when you paint her nails and do her makeup (she just likes you sitting on her lap)
- definitely one of those girls thats like. obsessed w doctor pepper. its a serious problem 😞😞!!!
- has a little shoe box full of receipts, polaroids of you, and little souvenirs from your dates. :((
- literally melts when you scratch her back
- very into horror games/analog horror. definitely binge watched markipliers “faith” gameplay and talked about it nonstop
- miles morales is def her fave superhero. has so many of his comics and LOVES the spiderverse movies. calls you her gwen 😞😞
taglist!!! if ur name is crossed i cant tag u :((
@syrenada @dinaissoprettyoml @kingofmylastkiss @as2rid @greencacty @melissabarrerass @bratydoll @lov3lylotus @forelliesposts @echostinn @f3r4lfr0gg3r @r3wbeef @leatheredhearts @mousymaven @mina-281 @princessguardian444 @calystas-morning-tea @horror-whoree @slutshies @bearieio @mag-mfm @bubs-world @paran0id0blivi0n @sawaagyapong @bbygrlshelbs @gayh0rr0r @pl9ys @ellieslilslvvt @dollietes @elliesmellsbadd @ibloom4u @ddreabea @beestar120 @brunettedolls-blog @girlwonderchloe @elliesgflol @maris-koffin @emonopolyman @iloveeyousblog @fr3sh-tragedies @ilovaffles @certifedcrybunny @elleatethat @baldph0bic @clouded-whispers @4rt3m1ss @saggykneecaps @swtsuna @ell1esslutt @minixmel @yuyans-stuff @owmoiralover @thecowardwrites @lunascerebro @elliestrwbrry @iwantsoda @teeveegirl @dinasmoon @urnewghostfriend
#ellie williams x reader#loser!ellie#ellie x reader#ellie x y/n#ellie x you#ellie williams x you#ellie williams headcanons#ellie williams fanfic#ellie tlou#ellie the last of us#tlou2#tlou fanfiction#tlou x reader#lesbian#wlw
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i have been watching the stupid mid firefighter show and i’m so angry because they fucking invented love. they’re both so fucking stupid and damaged and they want to jump each other’s bones from the moment they meet and they do an enemies to repressed hopeless pining within a single fucking episode and they have a son. the guy who’s the son’s biological father is like well gee not sure i want his actual mum around but this confused puppy of a guy? yes. i need him to look after my son. no i’m not gay i just need to stare into my good friend’s eyes for a bit. no homo. we have friends who are lesbians. and meanwhile the bisexual one who isn’t even gonna kiss a guy for another five seasons is perfecting the fine art of Yearning. every episode starts and ends with the most saccharine voice-over you’ve heard in your life and i can only assume that every second in between when these guys aren’t on screen they’re pining-while-fucking in the locker room. the emergencies they attend to are pulled directly from sensationalist warnings reposted uncritically by boomers on facebook. i’ve barely started season three. i’m so angry.
#911 abc#this is all your fault charlie#also nate from six feet under is there#and also an insanely hot lesbian
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Daniel finds out about Max’s divorce from a Google alert.
“FORMER F1 CHAMPION NEWLY SINGLE, SEEN HITTING THE BARS IN MONACO.” Journalistic excellence from the Daily Mail, as always. But when actual newspapers start reporting on it, Daniel decides to reach out. He texts Max a cat meme. Subtext: sorry about your failed relationship, also I know you like cats. Max texts back Are you trying to cheer me up, and then 😂. It’s unclear if he’s 😂 at the cat or the notion of Daniel attempting to comfort. While Daniel is trying to figure this out a third text comes in. Stop reading stupid shit by dumb assholes who don’t know anything.
Nah it’s all good, I can’t read, Daniel replies. He hesitates, and then adds I am like. Sorry about stuff with kelly or whatever though.
Max thumbs-up reacts the message, and doesn’t reply.
Daniel figures Max’ll probably just start dating another exquisitely beautiful, exquisitely groomed woman with a disconcerting resemblance to his own mother. They’re ten a penny in Monaco, where Max still for some reason lives.
He’s not prepared for the next tranche of articles his Google Alert brings him. “MAX VERSTAPPEN SEEN LEAVING GAY BAR.” “VERSTAPPEN REFUSES TO ADDRESS RUMOURS.” “VETTEL COMES TO VERSTAPPEN’S DEFENCE: ‘HE HAS A RIGHT TO A PRIVATE LIFE.’” Like… people go to gay bars sometimes, even if they’re straight. But do straight people let Seb Vettel defend their honour in the media?
Daniel opens his text thread with Max and types Hey, are you. You know.
He deletes it, obviously. He’s got a lot going on in his own life. Brand ambassadorships out the ass, his film production company, his vineyard. He sends Max another dumb meme and calls it good. Max is just doing Max stuff. It’s some belated F1 champion rumspringa, probably, because when he was an actual teenager he was psychotically focussed on racing. He’ll settle down soon enough.
Daniel really isn’t expecting him to announce live on Dutch television that he has a boyfriend. The clip is in Dutch, obviously, but someone has added English captions, and Daniel watches over and over again. RIP his YouTube algorithm. It’s some daytime talk show, the kind of thing Max hates, the kind of thing he’d never do unless someone was twisting his arm about it. The host asks all sickly sweet if there’s a special someone in Max’s life. Max says, “Well yes of course there is my boyfriend.” The “of course” in Dutch sounds like naturally. Naturally, naturally. “And my family I am very close to, as well.” The camera dwells with voyeuristic glee on the talkshow host’s face as she tries and fails to pick her expression up from the floor. “Your boyfriend?” she manages. Max nods, impatient. Daniel rewinds the clip. Your boyfriend? Your boyfriend? Your boyfriend?
Daniel decides to visit Monaco. Not because of Max. It’s summer and the swing of the season is funnelling him that way, that’s all, towards the parties and the glittering people dancing on yachts, getting high, bright and beautiful, living that good life. He doesn’t have an apartment there anymore, but Max does, because Max never left: still has his custom penthouse with its views of the harbour. Unless—it’s a weird thought—unless Kelly kept it in the divorce. But when he texts Max to invite himself to stay, Max doesn’t mention anything about a new address.
Max also doesn’t sound, like, super enthused, but that’s just how he is. It’s his natural Dutchness, most likely. Fine you can come then. You are lucky I don’t have plans is probably just the Dutch way of saying “Yeah sounds great, looking forward to reconnecting.” You are very annoying is probably how people from the Netherlands express affection. Daniel texts back Love you too my brother 🤘🤘
He gets his hair touched up before he goes, a little bit of tattooing at the roots in the front. He does a spray tan, and gets his face dermaplaned (not in that order). You can’t go to Monaco and not look good, that's all.
It always feels kind of weird, flying into Nice in a non-F1 context, first class instead of private, but Daniel fits, still: gets asked for his autograph at the airport, and then on the concourse, and when he stops to put petrol in his rental car (a sweet little Porsche, nice). He tosses his keys to the valet at Max’s building and the valet goggles. That’s right, baby: twelve-time Grand Prix winner Daniel Ricciardo is in town. Daniel winks and the valet turns gratifyingly mauve.
Max, when Daniel pushes into his apartment, is less enthusiastic. “Daniel. I really do not know why you’ve come.”
Daniel ignores him in favour of crouching down, trying to pet Jimmy or Sassy. “Hey, little guy,” he croons. “Or girl. What’s up? Do you remember Uncle Danny? Am I in town to show your daddy a good time? Yeah I am! That’s right. That’s right.” Jimmy or Sassy scowls at him and swipes with one needle-tipped paw. All right, drama queen. Daniel stands back up and grins at Max. “I mean, mostly I wanted to meet your boyfriend,” he says, for some reason. What the fuck, Ricciardo. He keeps grinning, styles it out. “Gotta give him the old shovel speech, right?”
Max is doing the blank-eyed stare Daniel remembers so well from their racing days. It’s wildly disconcerting coming from this Max, who looks. Different, that’s all. He’s thick, still fit and well-muscled but heavy with it now, t-shirt stretched over the layer of hard fat covering his abdomen, face softer. He’s a bear of a man, he could—he could do lots of things, obviously. It’s fine. It’s just that part of Daniel still expects him to be the gawky teenager Daniel loomed over.
Max says, “What do you want to say to my boyfriend about shovels,” and for a bewildering moment Daniel has no idea what he’s talking about.
“Oh, no, it’s like—it’s a saying, or whatever, when someone starts dating someone. I mean, usually dads say it, I guess, but like—the idea is if he mistreats you I’ll…” Daniel trails off as he realises he’s not actually sure what “shovel speech” means. “Uh, hit him with a shovel? Or I guess potentially, like, use it to bury his corpse. Whiiiich is a joke! Not actually going to bury anyone.” No, weird comment, Daniel’s not actually going to bury anyone t-shirt is raising a lot of questions et cetera. Hastily, he adds “As long as he behaves!” and then stands there mentally kicking himself while Jimmy/Sassy yowls soulfully near his ankles. He's never like this, he never loses control of a conversation like this. It's agonising.
Max stares at him for a long moment, and then cracks up. “Daniel, you are still so weird,” he says. It sounds kind of affectionate.
“You know it, baby,” Daniel says. “So, where’s the boyf?
Max’s cheeks go a little red, it looks like. Maybe Daniel’s imagining it. “Ricardo is at the gym,” he says.
Daniel has to have misheard that. “Sorry, what’s this dude’s name?”
“Ricardo,” Max says grumpily. “My boyfriend.”
“Right, yeah, of course.” Once again Daniel decides, against his better judgement, to style it out. “Uh, is he Australian, by any chance? And devastatingly charismatic?”
Max sighs, as if Daniel is being really annoying. “He is from Melbourne. And yeah, he is okay I think. Maybe you won’t like him though, because you like always to be the funniest one. Come on, I will show you to your guest room.”
Daniel manages a casual-sounding, “Haha, you got me.” They’re walking through the apartment, now, Max leading the way. For a moment Daniel just watches the sunburned back of his neck.
#my fic#DO straight people allow seb vettel to defend their honour in the media?#maxiel#mv33#dr3#getting back on the posting horse please clap#divorce era one of the most interesting of the potential eras imo#future fic
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ZOSAN FIC REC
Here is some of my fave zosan fics. Some of these I read years ago and so I don't fully remember what theyre about but they we're good enough that I still have strong emotional attachments when I see the name. Most of them are things I've read recently. Literally all I do all day is homework and have an app tts fanfics to me like an audio book so there's quite a few of recs here. I am not the best at summeries but just trust me bro these are GOOD SHIT. I only provide the best.
What I consider a good fic:
- Takes place in the one piece world (I don't like modern aus)
- Characters stay in character or if they do have changes from their canon portrayal there is a justifiable reason from within the story.
- Solid story telling and arcs (even the shorter fics)
- The Zosan dynamic is kept mostly how it is in canon they fight and bicker. (I know some like when they're soft with eachother like a loving married couple. You won't find much of that here)
- Some of these have pervy sanji, que nose bleeds and ogling.
With that out of the way here's the list!!
Now to my fave zosan fic of all time and ironically enough the only fic taking place in a modern setting:
Life is fine series. TW: Drug abuse, heavy angst, depression
I have reread this twice and forced a friend to read it too. It is so amazing not just for the zosan but for the genuinely good story telling. You follow zoro reeling from his sudden loss of relationship with Sanji and falling down a...Well uh, path. It's fucked it's dark it's depressing and its fucking riviting. Alot of the time reading this you're just like WHY DID SANJI LEAVE HIM WHAT IS GOING ON??? Honestly I need to reread this again.
Onto softer fics to heal your heart after that one:
Honor in limits, his strengths in weakness By Hawksbrood
“Fucking hell cook, what happened to you?” Zoro demanded, voice low so as not to disturb the others sleeping nearby.
Sanji rolled his eyes. “What do you think? I told you we got in a fight earlier.”
“Not that, your fucking feet!”
The cook snarled at that, crushing his cigarette in his teeth. “What the fuck do you mean, my feet? They’re just feet!”
Zoro’s eyes widened, looking at the bruised flesh before him. This wasn’t that.
This was just so good and cute. I appreciate watching zoro appreciate sanji. They take care of eachother but in a way where theyre both still them yeah know? I appreciate how sanji is written letting himself be vulnerable but understanding that he's always gonna be crass cause it's just a part of who he is.
come on, come on (turn a little faster) by donutsandcoffee
The one where everyone thinks they’re dating, Sanji is oblivious, and Zoro takes everything in stride.
Sometimes a love story can go in reverse.
I reread this one recently and it's just soft and sweet. I like watching sanji flounder around. The gay panic is great.
a complete guide to falling in love by ThousandSunny
Sanji was trained in the Bridal Arts; this does not go unnoticed by the rest of his crew.
I read this like 3 years ago and I dont remember much but I do remember loving it!
Part Timer By 8ball
Sanji really, really doesn't want to give Zoro a job at his restaurant. Zoro doesn't really even want to work there in the first place, but, well, there’s this thing with Sanji, and this thing with feelings and the whole thing is pretty damn stupid all together.
Zeff just wants grandkids. He’s too old for this bullshit anyways.
I am sure everyone knows 8ball very well they're like zosan famous but still just in case this one is really fucking good. Also read this 3 years ago so I don't remember much but I consider this a zosan classic.
Onto the rated R
Grand Buffet by asyndese
Drunk fic!!
If there was one thing Zoro knew, it was that you could always trust Sanji's inclinations to do a beautiful 180 as soon as he was drunk. Luckily, Zoro was more than equipped to handle it.
I spent. 30 minutes. Trying to find this fic again because that's how much I loved it. It altered my brain chemistry. Sanji getting a nose job during sex is just. aaaaaaaaa. Read it. Cannot suggest enough.
Horrors not yet known by Trixree
Sanji doesn’t know how he didn’t notice it before, is the thing. Of all the times he has seen Zoro shirtless (in battle, mostly) he just… never noticed. The problem is, once he has noticed, Sanji can’t seem to stop noticing. And neither can anyone else.
In which Zoro has a nipple piercing and Sanji has a Problem.
I recently reread this and the first time I read it I didn't really get the whole gender sanji shit. Now though???? Yeah another fic that rewired my brain chemistry. This fic opened doors for me it exposed me to a new world. Also sanji gay panic is in here and I live for that. It can be pretty raunchy (love that too)
Three rounds with a tiger by KobochaKitsune
Another drunk Fic!! also in modern times damn maybe I lied sdklfj
Liquid courage, drunken decisions, terrible euphemisms, and texts from last night, or: how to think entirely with the booze (and your dick) for once.
Or: By the time Sanji got to the party, everyone was already drunk.
I read this 3 years ago (theres a trend going on can you tell??) It also rewired my brain chemistry (from this point on just assume all of these nsfw fics rewired my brain chemistry each of these opened doors for me. This one opened the doors to bottom zoro.) Fucking 20k words of just pwp. I dont even know how the author did that bro like damn.
Nature of things by stark_black
Tw: Sex work and prostitutes
When the Sunny docks, Sanji and Zoro sometimes seek out relief in some not so savory places. After crossing paths in town on more than one occasion, the two find they have a lot more in common than they would like to admit.
I hunted this down for like fucking hours a couple of weeks ago because it was that good. Stark_Black has a fucking library worth of zosan fics this one is a classic to me. But if you want more content check out his other fics I think they have like over 100 zosan its kinda insane.
Coregasm by Yakarmi
Sanji discovers that sometimes, Zoro has orgasms while he lifts.
-----
“You…” Sanji trailed off, gaze turning down as he licked his lips. Pink tongue darting out nervously. “You orgasm when you exercise?”
Zoro clenched his jaw. Shrugged. Trying to act nonchalant.
“Sometimes.”
Sanji’s eye went wide, and like his mouth had suddenly been liberated from his brain, blurted out, “that’s so fucking hot,” before clamping his hands over his mouth. His cigarette fell from his mouth, bouncing soundlessly on the ground.
Bro bestie, the way this put me on nose bleed Sanji. Perv sanji. I need that gif thats like mmm cause man this is good.
Ending this fic rec with a BANG we have
Contingencies and Congruencies by PeaceSignDisasterBi
Somewhere between finishing the bottles of alcohol and mugs of beer, the crew comes together to create a contingency plan for something that may-or-may-not-happen during their time on the Grand Line and beyond. Usopp thinks it's more likely than bumping into zombies, Zoro wants to stay out of this, Sanji is just going with the flow, and Nami may or may not keep things legally binding and above board with consistent consensual acquiescence. Robin finds it all amusing.
The damn chart stays in the locked drawer in her desk, split into three neat categories: Devil Fruit Powers, Science, and Magic. Each represents whatever they're hit with but also categorizes the amount of self-control the person has during.
AKA: 5 times Zoro and Sanji had to help each other as Consensual Helpers of Dubious Consent + 1 Time There Was Nothing Dubious At All
Ok this is 152k long its pretty insane. It regoes over the arcs so throughly so carefully that I literally had to question my memory because I havent experienced alot of these arcs in a while (it's one of the reasons im rewatching one piece). I will say despite how amazing and well written this is I had a hard time comprehending sometimes. now I was sick at the time of reading this so that might be why but sometimes the way things were phrased felt like yoda talking. I think it's just me though. I'm not used to big words :(
And thats a wrap!! These arent even all the ones I wanted to include I have at least 20 more off the top of my head but I'll save that for another day. I hope you find joy in these fics Like i did I'll def do another one of these as cause I didnt even touch my sanji centric fics or germa 66 or just in general the best sanji fanfic writers. (Mentioned some of them like 8ball, thousand sunny and donuts and coffee.) Best of luck to yall and let me know what you think!
#one piece#sanji#black leg sanji#one piece sanji#vinsmoke sanji#one piece zoro#roronoa zoro#zoro#zosan#one piece zosan#op zosan#zosan fanfic#zosan fic#zosan fic rec#fic rec#one piece fic recs#sanji fic rec#zoro fic rec#8 ball#donutsandcoffee#thanks for stopping by!
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Miku, Rin, Len, Luka:
No propaganda!
Jay, Cole, Kai, Zane:
"They're my friends, they've been a team for over 10 years now and I've been there that whole time :)"
"Why shouldn't they win? They're little gay skittles. Or they're brothers. You choose"
"JUMP UP KICK BACK WHIP AROUND AND SPIN (sorry i am very passionate about the legos but too tired to form like. real sentences. please imagine something written about how they're cool and fueled my childhood or something)"
"OK SO
They’re the OG members of the ninja team and shipping all four of them together is popular and is very gay it’s called polyninja and it’s amazing and let me break down the dynamics of each of them
Zane x Jay: Technoshipping
Robot x their mechanic trope goes brrrr. Zane is a logical and smart one, and Jay is chaotic and kinda a disaster. Zane is the autism to his adhd and they are very fun <3
Zane x Kai: Oppositeshipping
Ha ha opposites attract trope goes brrr. Again, Zane is logical and smart, whereas Kai is impulsive (and also smart just in a different way). Both of them feel emotions strongly but process them in different ways and I have to end it here before I write an essay about how ZANE was the one who with a single meaningful look and touch to the arm told him it was too late to go back, how Lloyd mentioned KAI to try and restore Zane’s memories when he had amnesia, how- (You get the picture)
Zane x Cole: Glaciershipping
Mom friend x Dad friend. I have realized that his is getting long so I am going to be much briefer now
Jay x Kai: Plasmashipping
Two adhd/add idiots being stupid together <3
Jay x Cole: Bruiseshipping
Best friends to lovers what more could you want (don’t start me on this one they have so much chemistry)
Kai x Cole: Lavashipping
I am bad at words for this one but just trust me they’re a Vibe ok they’re a Vibe
Zane x Jay x Kai x Cole: Polyninja
THEY ARE STUPID, GAY, AND IN LOVE, YOUR HONOR"
#vocaloid#lego ninjago#hatsune miku#kagamine rin#kagamine len#megurine luka#jay walker#cole brookstone#kai smith#zane julien#polls#four of them showdown#round 1#OBSESSED with the propaganda for this one
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snow angel - track one
series masterlist // next
1 YEAR LATER
liked by alex_albon, blakelively, mickschumacher and others
rheareynolds soft launches are a thing right?
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user1 nah cause how did lando no wins fumble her?
↳ user2 the better question is how did nowins ever bag her in the first place
user3 imagine fumbling the rhea reynolds. lando no bitches truly fucked up.
alex_albon i expect credits for that third picture. i was scarred for life.
↳ rheareynolds you're the one who barged in demanding we watch a movie.
user4 she's gone for a year, besides promotional purposes for her ep and comes back with a soft launch?
user5 MOTHER, WE DEMAND ANSWERS! WHO IS HE?
user6 can't believe a m*n stole my wife. she was for the girls and the gays only.
lilymhe can't believe some blonde bitch stole my wife.
↳ rheareynolds still yours baby. always 😘
↳ lilymhe good. blondie could never compete with me
↳ user7 i thank god everyday that rhea's break-up with no wins didn't take this wonderful duo from us.
vancityreynolds what the fuck? who is that? better not be some vroom guy again.
↳ rheareynolds don't you have children to take care of? blakelively you're overgrown toddler is loose again.
↳ blakelively oh how adorable! i expect to meet him when you're ready.
↳ vancityreynolds you're supposed to be on my side?
↳ blakelively i only married you for your sister.
↳ rheareynolds suck on that ryan!
↳ user8 this family is my everything.
charles_leclerc when did you start dating? why was i not informed of this?
↳ georgerussell63 or me?
↳ maxverstappen1 why did alex know before us?
↳ rheareynolds i told lily, who told alex. you think i wanted that guy to know?
↳ alex_albon i can read your comments rhea.
user9 no wins really thought everyone would drop rhea the moment they broke up these guys love her.
user10 WHY IS NO ONE LOSING THEIR SHIT OVER RHEA SOFT LAUNCHING? WHO IS THIS MAN? WE MUST HAVE ANSWERS!
↳ user11 as long as this one doesn't cheat on her, we don't really care.
↳ user12 something no wins never could do
george russell who is he?
charles leclerc we demand answers rhea!
pierre gasly i just like gossip
max verstappen oh so suddenly now she can't answer?
alex albon i love knowing something you guys don't
lily muni he reminder you only know because i accidentally told you
esteban ocon you people are stupid.
max verstappen excuse me?
esteban ocon i would recognize that blonde head of hair anywhere
lance stroll i would too. it’s mick
rhea reynolds BOOOOO! way to ruin my soft launch dumb and dumber
charles leclerc ANOTHER DRIVER?
george russell WHAT HAPPENED TO “I’LL NEVER DATE ANOTHER FUCKING DRIVER AGAIN?!”
rhea reynolds you’re gonna look at mick and say not to him?
lily muni he i wouldn’t. that’s like saying no to a puppy
alex albon they truly are the golden retriever and black cat trope.
lance stroll you’re fucking welcome
pierre gasly for what?
lance stroll for setting them up on a blind date? well lily helped.
lily muni he yeah i did! they’re great for each other
charles leclerc at least we know he won’t cheat on her like n*rris
rhea reynolds my brother would be proud of the censorship of his name. he still calls him no bitches to this day.
george russell well ryan is an icon and l*ndo has no bitches.
alex albon doesn't he have a girlfriend?
charles leclerc i thought they broke up?
max verstappen doesn't matter, in our hearts he will always remain bitchless
max verstappen and that is not me saying his girlfriend is a bitch. i've never met her.
rhea reynolds i heard she was nice girl. i just hope l*ndo didn't cheat on her like he did on me
daniel ricciardo what'd i miss?
liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1, estebanocon and others
rheareynolds saw you bitches say on twitter i was trolling with my last post. i'm not, i am no longer bitchless. some people can't relate.
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user1 SHOTS FIRED! SHOTS FIRED!
user2 MAN DOWN! MAN DOWN!
estebanocon i'm telling him you called him a bitch
↳ rheareynolds do it you french fuck, i'll tell him you called him an overactive golden retriever puppy.
↳ estebanocon you wouldn't dare.
↳ rheareynolds try me bitch
user3 REGINA GEORGE HAS FIRED SHOTS!
user4 he may be bitchless but you still think about him
↳ user5 that's not the flex you think it is sweetie.
maxverstappen1 get this shit off my phone. it's gross.
↳ rheareynolds you dad is gross but you don't see me complaining do you?
↳ maxverstappen nice to know you're back to your old self
↳ rheareynolds and better than ever baby!
luisinhaoliveira99 is it me? am i the drama?
↳ rheareynolds no baby, it could never be about you 👩🏼❤️👩🏻
↳ user6 WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?
user7 OSCAR? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
↳ user8 this just got messy with a capital M
vancityreynolds rhea lobster reynolds, i demand to meet him.
↳ rheareynolds mom (blake) said you could meet him when i was ready.
↳ vancityreynolds and i'm supposed to care because?
↳ rheareynolds hey blakelively your overgrown toddler is back at it again!
↳ blakelively leave the poor girl alone ryan.
maxfretwell i would love to inform you that sushi just let out an unholy screech
↳ rheareynolds must be because he's bitchless, can't relate.
daniel ricciardo oh, so that's what i missed!
↳ user9 not this man being confused on what's going on. me fr.
it's mick isn't it?
how the fuck?
i'm your older brother dumbass. besides, mick's the only blonde esteban hangs out with. that i know of.
you're not as stupid as everyone says you are.
who the fuck is saying i'm stupid?
your mom
WE SHARE THE SAME MOM DUMBASS!
i know, and she says you're stupid.
i still expect to meet him, as your boyfriend.
of course you do.
rhea reynolds added one person
rhea reynolds ryan figured it out.
mick schumacher i told you he wasn't as stupid as you thought he was.
daniel ricciardo YOU'RE DATING MICK? WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME?
max verstappen you're supposed to read the group chat dumbass
charles leclerc l*ndo just called carlos to complain.
rhea reynolds good. he deserves to suffer.
mick schumacher she wrote an album about him
rhea reynolds NOT TRUE! THERE'S AT LEAST ONE SONG ABOUT YOU ON THERE! MAYBE MORE!
lily muni he is there another song about me? 🥰
alex albon you two said what can i do was a joke!
rhea reynolds lily, babe, that song wasn't about you?
lily muni he WHAT? EXCUSE ME?
rhea reynolds it was about a hypothetical with this other girl, who's not important. but i told you it was about you because you were so happy?
lily muni he don't ever talk to me again. i'm heartbroken.
pierre gasly it's giving charles and max.
max verstappen bitchless just called and asked me if i knew who you were dating and how you knew luisa.
rhea reynolds i met her while she was dating n*rris. monaco is not that big.
alex albon tell him she's dating some actor like ross lynch or something
lily muni he how long did it take for you to come up with a blonde actor?
alex albon too long
lance stroll tell him it's luisa in a blonde short wig.
charles leclerc that'll shut him up for a while.
rhea reynolds tell him it's taylor swift in a short wig.
daniel ricciardo thank god i don't have to hear his screeches anymore.
rhea reynolds that's one upside to being unemployed.
daniel ricciardo i have a job?
rhea reynolds but do you though?
¡leclerc-s speaks!
i'm indulging in my love for both mick schumacher and renee rapp + blake lively. i was originally going to make the oc a lively but i kinda wanted her name to have same alliteration renee's name has and nothing with an L went well so i chose reynolds instead. anyways, hope y'all enjoyed this!
¡disclaimer!
this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!
#leclerc-s#snow angel series#f1 instagram au#f1 x oc#f1 oc#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1#formula one#f1 fic#formula 1 fic#f1 x female oc#lando norris x female oc#mick schumacher x female oc
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how to lose a guy in 10 days !! csc (teaser)
choi seungcheol x reader
genre : fluff, smut, enemies to lovers, jealousy (?), fake relationship, bets (yk how the movie goes), profanities
synopsis : you had to prove to your friends that you could easily make a guy lose interest within a week, having no interest in indulging yourself in a relationship after your past ones. all those relationships led you to narrow down a list on how to make a guy sick of you. you had all the card in your hands and seems like you don’t get to play it.
warnings : mdni, proceed with causion bc this is my first actual svt fic it might be shitty. not proofread lol
it was another slow day at work when you sat down at your desk and sighed. all your work mates and friends seems to confide in your reaction but your circle knew that this sigh wasn’t a “damn-im-so-stressed-and-sick-of-work-sigh” for them it was more of a “wow-life-is-hectic-its-almost-making-me-want-a-man”
and just like clockwork their brains clicked and hovered over your cubicle. poor u so startled that you almost gagged on your coffee.
“what?” you shooted
“are we gonna meet boyfriend number 13?” karina said in a sing song voice
“more like fling number 17?” sakura retorted
“maybe a first situationship since she haven’t experienced one yet” yunjin said curiously
“jesus christ i’ve had that much men and i’m not gay yet?” you said surprised
“maybe you just need a new set up?” yunjin asked
“like what doggy style?” karina questioned
“not like that you idiot” sakura glared
“maybe i’m just meant to end up in a church and dedicate my life to holiness” you huffed
“please you would burn the moment you step in a cathedral” sakura laughed
“well i just know how every relationships end, it’s almost like completing all endings for a video game, its predictable and cliche” you sighed
“let’s welcome fling number 17 then” karina announced
“i’m too tired for just fucks you know? it won’t take long before i actually get infection and i turn into a zombie and bite you all from all these stupid ideas” you rolled your eyes at your friends.
right now you just actually need to see if theres a guy out there in the world who could actually commit and actually accept a persons flaws out of love.
all too cheesy but you would like to find a partner who would find no flaws in you and probably just call them your little unique antiques that they can live with.
you were so sick on seeing tutorials or manifestation hacks on the internet because does anyone genuinely love each other anymore? all these “how to become a maneater”, “how to make them dream of you”, “how to make him fall in love using a potion” bullshit got you sick of people now.
why did god even create men to accompany themselves if they’re preferences and expectations are for the deities taste themselves.
“OH MY GOD I GOT IT!” yunjin screamed making all your peers look over to your area
“what is it?” you asked dying for a solution
“what if you meet a guy and just unfling him?” she said as if there was a light bulb above her head
“yall need to make her stop doing overtime” sakura deadpanned
“NOO, like you’re talking all these commitment things all the time then what if you find a random guy and make him not fall in love with you and see if he stays?” she said
“so like i should go out being an annoying red flag and see if he stays?” you giggle but it all went away when all your friends kind of agreed because they’re also sick of u having these guy problems already.
“i guess thats not all bad” karina suggests
“you should wear your best outfit tonight because we will find your lucky target then y/nnie” sakura winked at you before discussing the plans with yunjin and karina
it was not long until the night came as you got ready, you scoffed on how stupid this bet is because it’s like you claimed “very predictable and cliche” to lose a guy.
it was then your friends picked you up and pulled up to the bar. a few shots came by as you hustled through the crowd searching for your so called the one. but as you surf through the tables everyone fell short to your friends standards as if it was a big serious thing.
you grew tired, what was the point, you knew your fate then you should probably accept it now.
you drank your last shot for tonight planning your weekend with whole lots of tubs of ice cream until you flinched by karina grabbing your arm.
“him” she said, audible enough for the three of you to hear. you faced the guy she was referring to as all the noice fade into the background blur hearing yunjin screech and them clapping happily, your time froze.
the most goddamn, drop dead gorgeous man came to sight.
“isn’t that choi seungcheol?” sakura stating a rhetorical question
“they said no one could ever bag him up” yunjin replied
“ooh sounds like one of y/n’s guys” karina giggled.
“are you up for it then?” sakura challenged you
“please this will probably come by a breeze, so? 100 bucks each?” you winked as the three of them agrees after a total chaos.
“choi seungcheol, let the games begin” you muttered
comment to be included on the taglist !!
#seventeen x reader#seventeen oneshot#seventeen imagines#seventeen x you#seventeen#seventeen fic#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#seungcheol svt#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol smut#scoups x reader#scoups fluff#scoups scenarios#scoups smut#scoups#svt scoups#svt x reader#svt imagines#svt smut#svt fluff#svt#svthub
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Okay, okay, okay listen.
Remember when we were all obsessed with Steddie Legally Blonde a while back? Yes, I’m still thinking about it, leave me alone. And I adore everything I’ve read. It’s all so fantastic.
But I had a thought because what if we switched it up a little? I’m going mainly off of the musical here, so bear with.
So what if instead of having Steddie as Elle and Emmett, we instead have them as Paulette and UPS Guy/Kyle??? Like??? It fits, right???
But then, but THEN who do we have as Elle/Emmett?
Buckingham.
No, but just think of it!
Or I guess you don’t really need to because I’ve thought of it enough for all of us and it goes like this:
(OMG you guys I blacked out and when I woke up this thing was 3.1k long written over a few hours. I haven't edited this at all so please be gentle about typos/tense changes etc. The fever just took me.)
Chrissy is your quintessential girly girl. She is Elle Woods. She’s blonde, pretty, cheerleader, very feminine and happy where she is in life, President of her Sorority with her besties by her side and her guy who is… well he’s as good as any guy could be, right?
Jason is handsome, rich, well connected, he treats her with affection and he humours her when she has some pretty wild, out there ideas.
But then it happens and they break up because apparently having a girly girl for a wife just wouldn’t look good if he’s gonna live his life the way he wants to. Lawyer, his own practice, running for office.
Apparently her blonde hair and boobs would hold him back which, what the fuck???
What does that have to do with anything?
They love each other, right? That surface stuff isn’t supposed to matter. At all! They’re supposed to be together no matter what because they… they love each other?
Well fuck that noise, no one tells Chrissy Cunningham she’s too fucking blonde to do anything which is a hypocritical ass thing to say because has Jason looked in the fucking mirror recently?
Different fucking rules, apaprently.
Well, no more.
She’s gonna fuck up law school right along side him and she’s gonna wear fucking pink while doing it too!
And like, everything is going fine.
Chrissy’s not stupid, she knows how she’s perceived by people before they get to know her.
Vapid, bimbo, perky, blonde.
Like that’s an insult.
It’s just harder now that she’s away from her girls, gays and theys back home. And everyone here seems to think that the best way to live their lives is to look boring as shit while doing it along with tearing each other down.
She fucking hates it, but she’s determined to see it through.
It helps that she seems to have found the one person on the whole of the fucking east coast who actually listens to what’s coming out of her mouth rather than just paying attention to the hair on her head or staring at her tits.
Robin is so strange.
She’s different in such a refreshing way, it’s like being able to breathe clean air for the first time in years.
And she’s fucking sharp. And sweet. And so, so comforting.
Chrissy would have never managed to survive the depression of those first few weeks without her.
And like, she’s not ignorant to the fact that Robin sometimes does look at her boobs but at the same time it just feels different coming from a woman than it does a man. It doesn’t feel so objectifying.
Instead of putting Chrissy on edge it makes her feel a little smug. A little proud of herself, it makes her feel attractive and desired in a way she hasn’t felt in a very long time.
Is that sexist? To prefer the attentions of a woman over a man when both do it just fine for her?
Chrissy’s not exactly sure, but she knows she enjoys it when it’s coming from Robin.
So maybe it’s a Robin thing.
Chrissy honestly thinks things are looking up for her.
Until Jason introduces Nicole.
His fucking fiancee???
It’s been, like, four months since they broke up.
Nicole hates her guts, she can tell. She thinks she’s some two braincelled idiot who got into Harvard on daddy’s dime and needs to be babied through the simplest of tasks while not understanding how condescending everyone’s been the whole time.
Chrissy fucking understands. She’s been through it all before, but back then she had people by her side. It’s all so fucking childish. The world already hates women enough, Chrissy desperately doesn’t want to be at another womans throat, over a man no less, but Nicole doesn’t seem to feel the same way.
She’s ambitious and cut-throat and dedicated and a little bit terrifying.
Apart from Robin, she’s on her fucking own out here.
And she needs something.
Something of home to bring some light back into her life.
So she gets in her car and just drives around the streets hoping something will catch her eye.
And it does.
Some tiny little hole in the wall salon with a pride flag out the front that she’s immediately drawn to because god damn it she misses her friends. The girls, the gays, the theys.
As soon as she pulls over she feels both simultaneously like she’s come home and she definitely won’t fit in here, but she’s so emotionally raw at this stage it all kinda ends up converging on her and now she’s standing in front of a mostly empty salon and there’s a guy looking at her and she’s just fucking crying.
Through her blurry vision she can see the guy approaching and she really fucking hopes this isn’t gonna turn into a thing because she just does not have any spoons left to deal with some creep right now.
But he seems to sense how he’s coming off because he becomes a little more effeminate from one step to the next.
“You okay, honey?” He asks, big brown eyes wide with concern and a hand covered in rings hovering over her shoulder, not touching. He has a cigarette in the other hand, held away to keep the smoke from reaching her, his arms covered in ink but Chrissy wants nothing more than a cigarette right now.
Or, that’s kind of a lie, but she’d love one in all honesty. She hasn’t smoked in so long.
The guy spots her eyeing it, sticking the cigarette back between his plush lips and needing to use both hands to pull his carton from his pants considering they’re so tight.
“Bad day?” He hands her one and Chrissy ends up breaking down all over again.
She tells him that it hasn’t just been a bad day, but a bad half a year, really. She tells him all about Harvard and Jason and her professors and Robin and by the end of her ranting they’re sitting back in the breakroom of the salon. They guy’s name is Eddie, she learns and despite his mean and scary exterior Chrissy thinks he might be the gentles person she’s met in this whole god forsaken city.
He holds her hands between his and listens to her. Actually hears her talk and pays attention and is concerned and attentive and she loves him for it.
He helps her find her confidence again, at least for the rest of the day. They commiserate about how they both stick out like sore thumbs in their communities and how people need to just kinda get over it.
He encourages her not to let the normies win, do go hang out with Robin, to go kick ass and she’s just wondering how on earth she can ever repay the favour when they hear
“Knock, knock.”
Coming from the front of the salon.
Eddie’s whole face drains of colour before immediately turning red and he bolts up from his chair, stumbling out of the staffroom and moving back behind the receptionists desk.
Chrissy gets to watch in real time as all of Eddie’s incredible confidence and easy lightheartedness disappears into a vat of nerves mostly hidden by cheeky flirtation as he twirls a lock of hair around his finger and bats his eyelashes at the Hot UPS Guy who looks equally as charmed.
When the guy, Steve, has to get back to his route, Eddie practically melts against the desk as soon as he’s out of sight.
“Looks like I’m not the only one who needs help.”
Eddie rolls his eyes at her but smiles anyway. “I had that handled just fine.”
Over the next few months, she and Eddie get closer, Eddie and Steve stay exactly where they were that first day and she and Robin are quickly approaching best friends level.
But Chrissy is starting to come to terms with the fact that maybe she wants a little more than to be best girly-girl friends with Robin and maybe she wants to stick her tongue down her throat about it.
The two of them are practically attached at the hip, spending all day at classes together, alternating between their respective rooms to study late into the night, ending up in the same bed together and waking up together in the morning.
Chrissy is almost, completely, entirely sure that this is all very not platonic but it’s so difficult to tell.
She’d be constantly sleeping over with her friends back home, hugging, kisses on cheeks, cuddling in bed or when watching movies, just girly things.
But this feels different. Is it different?? Or is this just how Robin is with all her female friends, the same way it’s always been how Chrissy was with her friends back home. How can she tell if it’s going from platonic to romantic??
And all of that needs to go on the backburner anyway because they’re being put on a real life, for realsies you guys case. And if they fuck up this case they could be at fault for someone spending the rest of their fucking life in prison for something they didn’t do??
Unacceptable.
And after Chrissy finds out their client used to be on the same cheer team as her? It was all over. No way was she gonna let her go to prison just because everyone thinks a pretty young woman couldn’t possibly love someone a little older than her.
Not on Chrissy’s watch.
But first she has to deal with Robin’s wardrobe because they professor is insistent that all the women wear skirts and tights and Robin is not having it.
Neither is Chrissy to be fair, so she takes Robin out to the most lavish place she can, decks them both out in the fiercest looking pantsuits they can get their hands on, refusing to back down.
It comes as a surprise to both of them when Nicole stands with them in solidarity as well and now their professor is both outnumbered and losing his arguments with only Jason on his side about this and they fucking win.
It’s only a small win but it still feels fantastic.
Riding her high of winning that small fight, she bursts into the salon and informs Eddie that he is going to either kiss or ask out Steve the next time he sees him and when Eddie reacts like she just said she was going to shave all of his hair off she refuses to hear it.
Because the thing is Eddie is pretty, really pretty and she knows that Steve knows it, but she doesn’t think that Eddie himself is really aware of it. And despite his prettiness, he’s all awkward elbows and knees.
So she gives him some tips and shows him how to highlight certain things about himself, the long legs, the tattooed arms, the hip bones. Even his cute little bum. She teaches him how to subtly pull at his clothes in conversation so some skin is exposed or his tiny little waist is highlighted. She teaches him how to use his eyes to go in for the kill.
He doesn’t seem to think it’ll work but she is almost certain it will.
And it’s confirmed for her when she gets a call later that night from Eddie who sounds fucking over the moon and completely bewildered by the fact that Steve likes him back??? Has done for months?? And they had some incredible dirty nasty sex in the salon after it closed for the night and how they’re going to the movies tomorrow??
Eddie swears he’s gonna send her the biggest fuck off fruit basket he can find.
Everything is looking up for her, especially after she has such a major win in court, figuring out one of the prosecutors witnesses had perjured himself on the stand (without outing him to the whole damn court, thankfully).
Or at least everything was looking up for her until she found herself alone in a room with her professor and she felt the energy in the room shift before it happened.
His hands were on her before she could do anything about it and she cracked him across the face for it before she could even think about what this could do to her legal career going forward.
Because that was the reality of it, wasn’t it?
Either allow herself to get assaulted or destroy her career before it even started.
She didn’t know when her priority had shifted from getting Jason back to actually pursuing this as a future career. But she had found to her own surprise she loved it. She adored it actually.
And now…
Now it would all be gone.
Jason had seen, of course he had and he was less than kind about it because apparently it made more sense that she had fucked her way into Harvard than had actually been smart enough to get there on her own.
She couldn’t stomach anything Nicole could possibly have to say to her but if the way she was glaring at Jason with barely concealed rage after that comment was anything to go by, Chrissy didn’t need to worry too much about that.
She just wanted to go. To get out. She needed to get out. And she would have gotten away scott free if Robin hadn’t been hanging around waiting for her.
Robin’s face broke into a bright smile but that quickly slipped away when she saw the state Chrissy was in. She was all sweet concern and care and affection but Chrissy couldn’t fucking deal with it at that moment, she couldn’t face her.
She couldn’t face Robin who would find out what a fool of herself she’d made believing in Chrissy, when Chrissy had thrown all of their hard work away.
Because no one would ever fucking see her as a person. She was just a piece of ass.
So she ran.
She didn’t even realise where she was running to until she was standing outside the salon doors again.
It was late, they were closed, of course they were, why was she here?
She was standing outside the door crying again like she had been the first time and it was all just so fucking stupid-
“Chrissycakes?”
She was enveloped in Eddie’s arms before she could even blink, being ushered inside and steered back to the staffroom, same as that first time.
There were beer bottles and take out containers over the table and Steve sitting at the table and oh, she’d interrupted something hadn’t she?
What a fucking way to officially meet one of her best friends new boyfriend right?
But they were so sweet.
They sat and listened while she spilled the whole thing, offering at different points to hunt down her professor for her or slash his tires or lose all of his mail or whatever and she was forced to giggle through the tears.
But she shook her head in the end. She was tired. She was sick of having to defend herself constantly.
She needed… she needed to go back to where she belonged.
And she was about to.
She was about to leave the salon, swear to keep in contact with Eddie because god damn it she loved him now and she was ready to run.
But then there was a hammering at the door and Chrissy poked her head out to see Nicole standing there looking like she was on a fucking crusade.
And… was that…?
Robin was standing behind her, looking like she was just trying not to get in Nicole’s way.
Eddie grumbled to himself about changing the damn salons opening hours if this was to continue but he unlocked the door anyway.
Nicole burst in all fire and determination, shoving her finger directly in Chrissy’s face.
“I hated you. But god fucking damn it if you didn’t prove to me that this is the career you belong in. And I refuse to stand by and see an admirable woman of your smarts and calibre get run over by some small dicked professor with a receding hairline. You’re so much more than that. So c’mon. We’re breaking through that fucking glass ceiling if it kills us.”
Holy shit.
Robin pulled her into a tight hug, warm and comforting and a little too long to be platonic, running a hand through her hair.
“We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with Chris, but… you deserve to be in that courtroom.” She muttered into her ear and Chrissy could do nothing but nod into Robin’s neck.
She heard Eddie sigh behind her. “Okay if we’re doing this then… I need to make a few calls.”
A few days later Chrissy made her triumphant return to the courtroom. Everyone was there to support her. Eddie, Steve, her besties from back home that Eddie had called, telling them it was a friend emergency and so of course they all came right away along with Robin and Nicole bracketing her on each side.
And while she could tell the court wasn’t taking her rants on hair care very seriously, when she finally came out with the verbal crackdown, proving the witness was actually the murderer, the gasps from the gallery were enough to feed her for years to come.
When all was said and done at the celebration later that night, she found herself being approached by Jason.
He told her it was a mistake to let her go, to discard her the way he had and she agreed that yes it was. But his mistakes weren’t her problem anymore. And from the look of it they weren’t Nicole’s problem either.
Jason surprisingly took it well enough, mentioning that he never really felt the same passion for law that she so clearly possessed.
She wished him luck with finding what he wanted to do.
But now.
Now she needed to find Robin.
Chrissy couldn’t take it anymore.
So weaving through the people around her, she grabbed at Robin’s hand, dragging her away from Steve who she had become inseparable with and pushing her into the hallway.
Robin didn’t even have a chance to ask what was happening before Chrissy was on her, pressing her into a wall, holding her close with her hands on either side of her face, kissing her with so much longing and elation and joy and happiness that when she pulled away Robin looked completely dazed.
Robin blinked slowly a few times before her face broke into a wide grin.
“Me too.”
#buckingham#robin buckley#chrissy cunningham#robin x chrissy#buckingham fic#legally blonde au#buckingham legally blonde au#chrissy x robin#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#penny00dreadful#i dont know what happened#it just appeared#wild huh?
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okay, ignore the previous ask, i can't be more blind and stupid (💀).
so, if it isn't a bother, may you write some headcanons about the kings (satan, mammon, beelzebub and leviathan) with a reader who's slightly chubby and dislikes their (reader's) body.
thanks in advance, dear.
–☕ (wishing to end myself after this one.)
Hi ! Thank you so much for your request and congratulations for being the first request that is not about sex lol I needed a break.
Here it is! I loved writing this request and I hope you like it ♡
It's a bit OOC in some parts (Leviathan), but in my defense, it's not easy to write fluff about them.
Also, I'm sorry if I didn't focus much on the body type part, I'm not a great fan of specifying the reader's body type, race, and sometimes even height, but it's okay! I tried my best.
Also, this is my contribution to the soft and sweet Mammon HC.
𝗪𝗛𝗕
𝗞𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦
"𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗦𝗘𝗟𝗙 𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘 𝗜 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗬𝗢𝗨"
♡
𝗦𝗔𝗧𝗔𝗡
✮ He’s in denial, Satan has you on a pedestal and he genuinely cannot believe that you think this way about yourself, simply because it’s a completely different opinion than the one he has of you.
✮ If you dare to mention any discomfort with your appearance in front of him, he will laugh in your face telling you to stop joking about such things, and when you look at him completely serious he might realize that he was wrong.
✮ Satan genuinely doesn't have any specific body preference, in his eyes you’re perfect, all he cares about is that you’re healthy both physically and mentally.
✮ Once he fully realizes, you won't EVER hear him joking about it, and if someone else dared to they’re dead within seconds. The same goes for you "jokingly" mistreating yourself, that's the biggest offense for him and the lecture your life awaits you.
✮ This situation would become a priority for satan, he's capable of leaving aside all his work just to do the impossible to make you feel better about yourself.
✮ He gets very frustrated every time you talk negatively about yourself, and he feels sad every time he notices that you feel insecure about your body, Satan somehow puts himself in your shoes, and that makes him take everything too seriously.
“Stop looking at yourself like that, I know what you're thinking and I don't like it” He hugs you from behind "Let's talk, you're too pretty to be thinking those things"
𝗕𝗘𝗘𝗟𝗭𝗘𝗕𝗨𝗕
✮ He might believe that you’re joking if you tell him, and he also might jokingly tell you something like “Yeah, I don’t like your body either” Clearly no offense intended, he would genuinely think that you’re not being serious.
✮ Beelzebub won’t realize that his “Harmless comment” made you feel bad unless someone else tells him that he screwed up, probably many days later he will approach you and actually apologize.
✮ Don’t expect any elaborate apologies from him, he will tell you what is necessary. But after he has taken a long time trying to remember everything you said to him that day, he will subtly start looking for ways to make you feel better about yourself.
✮ Believe me, Beelzebub is going to make sure you hear every chance he gets about how perfect you are, and in case he forgets to tell you, Bael is under strict orders to remind him.
✮ He’s really supportive but he sucks at showing it, his main goal is to distract you from your insecurity by at the same time trying to not distract himself, and somehow, it works.
"And who said that being yourself is not okay? As long as that beautiful body of yours is well-fed and healthy, you are the hottest person out there"
𝗠𝗔𝗠𝗠𝗢𝗡
✮ He would get offended, but like, really offended, the moment he notices or when you tell him about it he acts like those Latina grandmas when their grandchild tells them they're gay,
literally him.
✮ He's never seen anyone more ethereal than you, how do you even dare to dislike yourself?
✮ He genuinely doesn’t care about your body type, your weight, etc, as long as you’re healthy he’s going to love every part of you.
✮ He’s an amazing listener, Mammon will encourage you to vent to him while he slowly caresses your hair, and every time you say something he’s not okay with, he kisses your forehead.
✮ He wouldn't think you're joking, the opposite, Mammon would take this really seriously, but like, too seriously, to the point where you’re not getting out of Tartaros without loving your body as much as he loves it, and believe me, that’s a lot.
“How can you hate such a beautiful body like yours? Every inch of you is perfect and just looking at you feels like a privilege, so don't overthink too much please”
𝗟𝗘𝗩𝗜𝗔𝗧𝗛𝗔𝗡
✮ Leviathan will genuinely get mad at you, if he finds out, he will ignore you, and if you tell him, he will leave and ignore you too, but it’s temporary, he will get over it in a few days.
✮ He kind of sucks at comforting people, but he can and will try his best with you, just don’t expect much from him, and know that he’s genuine about it.
✮ He will make an annoyed face every time you comment something negative about yourself, and trust me, you will notice.
✮ Leviathan has a very good memory, and he’ll make a mental note of every part of your body that you mention that you don’t like, and every chance he gets he will make sure to kiss or caress that part. He won’t be very obvious, but somehow, he will find a way to discreetly improve your opinion of yourself.
✮ He would hang anyone who dared to make jokes about your body, and would also hang anyone who complimented you, only he has the right to do that.
✮ And on those days when you feel particularly bad about your body, Leviathan will be sure to find a way to distract you with something else, he’s very observant so he wouldn’t need to listen to you to know how you feel, he’ll just suddenly leave his work for a few hours and take you to one of your favorite places, even if he hates the place, he hates more that you have a bad opinion of yourself.
“Get those thoughts out of your head, people should be jealous of how you look, okay? Don't be ridiculous”
#prettybusy what in “hell” is bad?#what in “hell” is bad?#whb#whb satan#whb beelzebub#what in hell is bad x reader#whb mammon#whb leviathan#whb leviathan x reader#whb satan x reader#whb mammon x reader#whb beelzebub x reader
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horse girl zoro/prince sanji au that @redgitanako and i talked about way back when because it suddenly crossed my mind OKAY HERE WE GO
zoro’s a travelling bounty hunter with three horses. yes, three. don’t tell kitetsu and enma but wado’s his favourite
wado was kuina’s horse; when kuina died she was so sad because she didn’t get why kuina was gone and for a while zoro had to emotionally support a horse AND himself, but horses are smart creatures. wado understood by herself after a while. they don’t really talk about it.
on that note, zoro talks to his horses. people look at him like he’s a few crayons short of the whole pack but they don’t say anything because he looks scary as hell; built like a brick wall, one eye gone, gnarly scar across his chest and all
(they’ll never know that he’s having an argument with enma about buying supplies where one party is contributing in possibly-misinterpreted horse looks. the crayons aren’t missing— but it’s admittedly a little hard to prove they’re there, zoro, we can’t keep defending you like this)
sanji's the third prince of the kingdom that hires him; sora’s the queen, and his siblings are all decent other than regular sibling assholery. judge is on the run and they’ve made the collective decision that they want his head on a stick.
zoro expects sanji to be a stuck-up priss because he LOOKS like a stuck-up priss— look at his perfect hair. his clothes. his heeled boots and his stupid curly eyebrows
but NO. well, yes, sanji IS a little bit of a stuck-up priss but also, he’s good with horses?? wado takes to him like a DREAM and zoro's flabbergasted because anybody who has ever tried to coddle her other than zoro or kuina has gotten kicked in the head, but sanji's petting at her neck and cooing at her in baby-talk and she's licking sugar cubes and apple slices out of his palm. zoro feels so betrayed.
like of COURSE his horse had to take a liking to the boy he hates OF ALL PEOPLE.
(zoro. at this moment the horse is smarter than you. listen to her.)
reiju’s the princess here, but sanji’s the one who got all the magic-esque affinities. animals LOVE him. he would be a literal disney princess if not for the fact that he doesn’t love them back
like SQUIRREL. WHY ARE YOU SHITTING ALL OVER MY YARD. GO AWAY. WHY IS A DOG TRYING TO LICK MY HAIR. WHYYY IS THIS BIRD BRINGING ME STICKS ALL THE TIME. he’s trying to fall asleep. he hears a TSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSKTSK. he sits up and gets right out of bed and starts yelling at the lizard on the ceiling.
he does have a pretty mare called maple, though! (and zoro can’t help but love her too; it’s a sign that the mosshead doesn’t clock until much, much later)
and then zoro comes into his life with his three horses and sanji yanks him in by the collar like "listen up, swordsman. i do not CARE how sweet your horses are. i do not CARE how— how— WHATEVER you are. if you stink up my stable i will make you sleep in it, are we clear?" and zoro just nods because he’s having a bit of a gay crisis
sanji is 1. pretty 2. entirely able to hold his own and 3. Wado Approved™ and zoro does NOT know how to deal. at all. he’s holding onto wado’s reins for dear life. he wonders if the same ultimatum would apply if he swapped out the word stable for bed and immediately wants to dunk himself into the horse trough.
meanwhile sanji isn’t spared at all. sora sits on her throne, one eyebrow raised as her son goes on and on about how "mother i hate the swordsman you hired. he's green. and ugly. like a troll. like an OGRE. his hands are too big. his boots are too shiny. his earrings are cute but only because i want them. his EVERYTHING smells like horse. he might as well be a horse with how strong he is, did you know how many hay bales he carried at once??" and she’s just like,,, "honey are you sure this is hate"
she certainly wouldn’t mind them being together. zoro is rough around the edges and does smell a bit like horse, admittedly, but he was clearly raised right— he’s respectful in his own gruff way and he does things with immense care. sora’s noticed. she knows her son well enough to know that he’s noticed, too.
one day sanji bumps into zoro on his way out of the baths and wow. okay. so he doesn’t smell like horse ALL the time and oh his hair is damp and there's a towel around his waist and he is very, very shirtless and sanji turns around in a panic and walks face-first into a pillar.
he watches zoro care for his horses, carefully brushing through their manes and coats as he speaks to them softly, and alright. maybe this guy isn’t all bad. animals, sanji has noticed, are brilliant judges of character; horses especially can be testy and temperamental, and they don’t hesitate to kick anybody they don’t like.
zoro’s horses love him, and it’s obvious. maple looks forward to the snacks he slips her when he thinks that nobody’s looking. that says a lot more about his character than anything else.
after a few days zoro has a solid plan down and sets out to find judge, and suddenly the stables are empty. sanji finds himself going out with maple more and more, exploring the woods around their forest to pass the time because he needs something to keep his mind occupied and there’s only so much he can cook. judge might be a piece of shit, but he’s also an evil genius, and sanji refuses to admit he’s worried even though he is.
and then zoro comes back with judge’s war helmet wrapped in a cloth, gore dripping off the bottom edge as he sets it at sora’s feet.
he’s a little banged up, tired as hell with a couple of scratches here and there— nothing serious, but sanji still drags him to the infirmary and cleans him up perhaps a little more emotionally than either of them had expected
he passes out for a good few days afterwards but sora invites him to stay for a little longer, a time frame that nobody specifies. zoro just kind of… doesn’t leave. it’s strange for him; he’s wandered, always. he gets antsy staying in one place for too long, but this blond prince that is strangely kind and gives back as good as he gets is really something else.
the days pass. they race and bicker and soon enough, all three of zoro’s horses have brass name plaques tacked above what are now their stalls. he had a room in the palace and a place at the dinner table. sanji’s hair has grown long, now, and neither of them talk about the way that zoro’s stay has become something that feels more permanent—
until zoro finally finds the balls to give sanji one of his earrings as a courting gift. it’s the first one of many, but at that moment sanji just looks at it wide-eyed and zoro starts to shrink back all like "if you. don't want it that's alright. i'll get you something new, something else—" because look, he knows he’s not much. he has money, but not enough to give sanji something really nice. not enough to get something that’s more impressive than all the jewels and gold that the prince could have at a whim. he’s a bounty hunter that came from dirt and this earring is the most precious thing he has to offer, but he understands if—
sanji kisses him. yells something borderline incoherent along the lines of about fucking time as he shakes zoro by the shoulders, but he’s smiling very brightly and he’s very beautiful and zoro has a feeling they're going to be just fine.
(sora and the siblings breathe a collective sigh of relief, because the pining looks and dejected sighing were really getting a little ridiculous.)
(they speak too soon. after they get together it somehow gets WORSE.)
this was a ride… (get it. get it.) okay i’ll stop HOPE YOU ENJOYED HEH i know a lot of places are having a flu season/covid wave going around rn so make sure to hydrate and eat well!! muaks 😽
#i have REALLY got to stop sleeping at 4am#horse girl zoro au#zosan#roronoa zoro#black leg sanji#zoro x sanji#one piece#sanji#one piece zosan#one piece sanji#one piece zoro#zoro
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Writing a fic where Jango wasn’t a willing progenitor because his family is still alive on Mandalore so Palpy did some fucked up shit to his brain and now the clones exist but one day while visiting home Jaster (who I love writing as force sensitive af) is all ‘my child has something weird in his noggin I’m gonna unravel it’ and now they know who the Sith Lord is and Jango is all ‘well. Now that that’s outta my brain-‘ and wanders off to tell the alphas that they can leave with their vod’e as soon as the Sith Lord is killed and the alphas being paranoid as they are are like ‘okay what do we give you in turn???’ ‘What do you mean this is a freebie’ ‘nothing is free prime, what do you want’ ‘lmao idk just babysit the Jedi they seem kinda stupid a little’ and the clones take that to mean ‘they are stupid and get themselves killed keep them safe’ and Jango doesn’t correct them cause this is hilarious and allows them to dig into the Jedi histories as much as they want only for them to come back all ‘ahh, yes, we see the senate has them in a chokehold and barely better than slaves living in a Diaspora being forced to their Will and their numbers have been steadily declining over the past thousand years. We see. They need help’ and Jango is all ‘…they fucking what???’ Only for the clones to already be fucked off to claim the Jedi as part of their people and no they will not be leaving sure you can try and run but we are here to help you sorta thing and Anakin is very eager for this, they saved all the slaves on Tatooine and saved his mom and stopped him from getting married cause if he gets married without Obi walking him down the aisle his master WILL cry about it and Plo and Shaak are repeating the gai bal manda to anyone they come across and it’s really very annoying and Mace shoved Kenobi at the sternest clones he could find saying ‘this one bites, he’s feral; tame him and win the prize’ and tbh they don’t know what the prize is but that sounds like fun and Obi is very annoyed at all times except when they pull him into their sleepy piles because that’s nice and yea he likes these dudes, they did not tame him tho he still bites he’s still feral at least they tried.
Anyways. Alpha 17 and Cody are the most annoying jerks ever who won’t let him run off into danger without them and Miss Shmi is awesome and disgusted by her son eating live bugs too so we no longer know where Ani gets it from that’s a shame and Mace is grounding anyone who adopts a clone or gets adopted by clones everyone is grounded. The Mandalorian empire is sorta peeking in like ‘wow. Are the Jedi okay??? They look a little annoyed??? But I haven’t heard of any of them getting murdered this week so probably???’ And it’s kinda hilariously adorable. The Mandos didn’t know they needed to worry about the Jedi and they’re super pissed at the Sith for hurting their prince’s brain and so yeah let’s join the clones they look like they’re having fun in the temple?????
#star wars#true mandalorians#jango fett#obi wan kenobi#the Jedi#anakin skywalker#clone wars#the clones#jaster mereel#but in clone wars era#he’s gettin older but he’s still kicking ass to defend his title lol
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