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smbhax · 1 year

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First photo of Leon F. Czolgosz after his shooting of US President William McKinley in 1901, photos illustrating the assassination attempt, as McKinley shook hands with the public at the Pan-American Exposition’s Temple of Music in Buffalo, New York, and Czolgosz’s booking photo. [1][2][3] Though not directly fatal, the wound became gangrenous, and McKinley died a week later. The Exposition continued for another two weeks. Czolgosz was executed three weeks after it ended. At the time, US Presidents lacked a regular security detail. “Though it still lacked any legislative mandate, by 1902, the Secret Service (a unit of the Treasury) was protecting President Theodore Roosevelt full-time. [...] In 1906, Congress passed legislation officially designating the Secret Service as the agency in charge of presidential security.” [4]

#leon f czolgosz #leon czolgosz #us history #history #assassination #secret service #1900s #william mckinley #prison #imprisonment #assassin #pan american expo #pan american exposition #temple of music #buffalo ny #world's fair #leslie's weekly

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ngkiscool · 1 year

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After the girls - this week is all about the boys (and men) of Good Omens. Please mind the tags, rating and CW.

My inbox is open for suggestions, ideas and recs for stories that focus on supporting characters (as in, Aziraphale and Crowley are not the main ones). Self recs are encouraged!

Planned Obsolescence by HopeCoppice - 484 words, rated G, focusing on Newt and Pollution. Summary: Newt is already having a bad day. This might as well happen.

Sandalphon Meets His Match by Quannon - 4.2K, rated G, focusing on Sandalphon, R. P. Tyler, Aziraphale and Crowley. cw - vaguely implied violence. Summary: Sandalphon takes punishing Aziraphale and Crowley into his own hands with unexpected results.

Dog by EmaZuro - 466 words, rated G, focusing on Adam Young, Dog and god. Summary: Basicaly short story based on prompt from Good Omens Inktober. Dog and his master go for a walk and God gives you an advice.

Dick Turpin by @supergeek21 - 445 words, rated G, focusing on Newt, Anathema and Dick Turpin. Summary: An ode to the love between an awkward boy and his three-wheeled car.

A modern milkbottle by nightbloomingcereus - 497 words, rated G, focusing on Witchfinder Major Milkbottle and Sergeant Shadwell. Summary: Witchfinder Major Milkbottle has finally returned. But there have been some changes in the Witchfinder Army since he was last on active duty.

Run And Tell All Of The Angels. by Lanna Michaels (lannamichaels) - 2.3K, rated G, focusing on Adam Young, Greasy Johnson and Warlock Dowling. cw - surprise pregnancy. Summary: The bitter blood feud between the Youngs and Johnsons of Lower Tadfield ended with the arranged marriage of their children. In which there is a pregnancy, a dashing rich American, and Greasy Johnson wishes someone would pay him to go away.

Sleep So Sweet my Darling Boy, You Will Rule When Earths Destoryed by notebooksandlaptops - 1.6K, rated G, focusing on Warlock Dowling and Adam Young. Summary: Perks of being The Destroyer of Worlds, Angel of Darkness, Master of the Pit, Spawn of Satan on High, the Anti-Christ: the ability to control the weather, always getting exactly what you want for Christmas, your favourite couples on TV mysteriously ending up together and a man in your bed who had the weirdest upbringing because two dumbass celestial beings thought that he was you. Draw backs of being The Destroyer of Worlds, Angel of Darkness, Master of the Pit, Spawn of Satan on High, the Anti-Christ: Occasional Nightmares about who you could have been. Good job that Warlock is there and if Adam needs a lullaby, well, Warlock's got his childhood Lullaby Nanny taught him to hand...

Home For the Holidays by WaldosAkimbo - 1.3K, rated T, focusing on Lesley the International Express Man and Maud. Summary: A slice of Lesley and Maud and what they do for Christmas.

What We Do in the Dowling Estate by doomed_spectacles - 2K, rated T, focusing on Mr Harrison, Mr Cortese and Adam Young. Summary: A film crew follows Mr. Harrison and Mr. Cortese, private tutors hired to educate Warlock Dowling, the son of an American Ambassador.

His Master's Voice by @fenrislorsrai - 498 words, rated T, focusing on Dog and Adam Young. cw - unspecified traumatic things happen to people. Summary: Dog lives a long and happy life.Bodies are optional. He's not going back to Hell just because he's dead. His place is by his Master's side and always will be.

Bonus - master list with all past recommendations!

Authors - if you wish that your Tumblr account will be tagged, instead of the AO3, please comment or DM me the handle. Thanks :)

Thanks for reading, and remember - sharing is caring!

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littlegreekhero · 19 days

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Let Bernard in the BatKitchen™️

With the fact that he is a normie that dated his way into superhero identity top secrets, he knows too much to keep a low-profile. I see it inevitable that he gets dragged in the deal (either by being kidnapped weekly like he is now or by being a z tier hero or something) or get thrown out of it entirely.

Or he could, you know, make lunch boxes. Run the tests in the microwave. Be the lab (kitchen) guy that puts antidotes into bat shaped cookies. Do what he loves and put his degree(s?) to use. Run the computers and understand what batweebs wrote in the code when needed.

His own version of the guy behind the cape who makes everything stand together. Kind of like an Alfred or Oracle or Moneyspider or Dr. Leslie or Commish Gordon or... you get it. (In a perfect world i'd prefer him to be mentored by Alfred Pennyworth, but alas, he might be a little dead atm)

But I dont want him to lose his wits, his sarcasm, his high energy attitude while doing this stuff. He should still be able to jokingly threaten Tim if anything goes wrong, do the vibe checks, wear those sunglasses again, idk, anything interesting. He should be his own person. (And not what Fitzmartin made him into whaaa td:r slander? )

#bernard dowd go make me a sandwich >:[#yes i said 'an alfred' as a noun because its a proper profession to be him #and Alfred Pennyworth is the only one that can do justice to the duty of being one #bernard dowd #tim drake: robin #td:r #tim drake #robin 93 #alfred pennyworth #robin #timbern

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alexzalben · 9 months

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OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH RETURNS ON OCTOBER 5

OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH returns for Season 2 on October 5, with three new episodes. Max will stream two new episodes a week until the season finale on October 26.

Teaser trailer, key art, and more info below!

The eight-episode second season of the Max Original comedy series OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH, from creator-showrunner David Jenkins, Emmy®-nominated executive producer and star Taika Waititi, and Emmy®-nominated executive producer Garrett Basch, debuts with three episodes THURSDAY, OCTOBER 5 on Max. The season continues with two new episodes weekly leading up to the season finale on Thursday, October 26.

Season 2 logline: OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH is based (very) loosely on the true adventures of 18th century would-be pirate Stede Bonnet (Rhys Darby). After trading the seemingly charmed life of a gentleman for one of a swashbuckling buccaneer, Stede became captain of the pirate ship Revenge. Struggling to earn the respect of his potentially mutinous crew, Stede’s fortunes changed after a fateful run-in with the infamous Captain Blackbeard (Taika Waititi). To their surprise, the wildly different Stede and Blackbeard found more than friendship on the high seas…they found love. Now, they have to survive it.

Season 2 cast: In addition to Darby and Waititi, season two stars returning cast members Samson Kayo, Vico Ortiz, Ewen Bremner, Joel Fry, Matthew Maher, Kristian Nairn, Con O’Neill, David Fane, Samba Schutte, Nat Faxon, and Leslie Jones. New additions joining the ensemble cast include recurring guest stars Ruibo Qian, Madeleine Sami, Anapela Polataivao, and Erroll Shand, and guest stars Minnie Driver and Bronson Pinchot.

Season 2 credits: OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH is executive produced by Academy Award® winner Taika Waititi, alongside creator-showrunner David Jenkins. In addition to his duties as showrunner, Jenkins directed the first two episodes of season two. Garrett Basch, Dan Halsted, Adam Stein, and Antoine Douaihy also serve as executive producers. Season two was filmed in Auckland, New Zealand.

youtube

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd s2 #Youtube

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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 2 months

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03/18/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast&Crew; Samba; Leslie Jones; Taika; Rachel House; Rhys; Kristian; New Weekly Event Calendar; YouWear50Well; Ranker; AdoptOurCrew Rhys Radness; Fan Spotlight; Fundraiser Status; Kudoboard; Watch Parties; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

Hey friends! Thank you for the kind words about my head injury! So far so good, not dead yet-- although I am a bit out of it so I apologize if i'm not totally articulate! I appreciate you all reaching out and sending love <3 You are the best crew ever!

= Cast & Crew Sightings =

== Samba More BTS ==

Samba gave us a whole bunch more BTS today! This time regarding the Spanish Jackiez Set! (I ran out of room for images on this so please visit the stills links for the pile of pics Samba dropped.)

Stills #1: Spanish Jackiez Stills

Stills #2: More Spanish Jackiez Stills

Video #1: Matthew confirming stuff

Video #2: "Hey Hey, Just mee and my big swords here" - Erroll

Video #3: "Are you a husband Kristian?"

Video #4: Flaming Bananas Practice

Video #5: Flaming Bananas Take

== Leslie Fucking Jones ==

Just, what can I say, this woman is on fire every time I see her. <3

SRC: Leslie Jones IG

== Taika ==

Taika was all over the place today, which is AWESOME! It's so good to see him feeling more comfortable posting on SM again, he also apparently is in some sort of influencer era because he keeps posting product reviews, which is hilarious and awesome.

=Rachel House =

Rachel House directed The Mountain, and Taika helped Produce it, she's out exhibiting the soundtrack that's available now!

Are you currently in Aotearoa (New Zealand)? They've got some screenings of the Mountain and Q & A sessions with Rachel! Visit the @temauunga linktree for more information and availabilities!

= Rhys =

For those of you not already aware-- Rhys is having a cameo on Night Court! As the Duke of Greybog. Available on Peacock!

= Kristian Nairn =

Just Kristian being sweet and continuing to keep us updated

= Gizmo = Poor Gizmo is missing Theo.

== Mar 18 - 24 Event Calendar ==

March 19th: London Billboard Round 2!

== YouWear50Well ==

Early reminder! The 21st is Rhys' Birthday! Since it'll be the 21st for some crew members earlier than others, @yronnia was kind enough to give us information early regarding the 50th birthday news! Please be sure to Post your birthday wishes to Rhys and show him your appreciation! Send your fanart and other creations using #YouWear50Well. Please Note: Please do not tag Rhys repeatedly! He's going to be getting a lot of notifications. Even just having notifications under #YouWear50Well will help keep everything visible :)

== Ranker ==

Wanna help boost Our Flag Means Death? There's another Ranker poll! Remember to rank OFMD up, and other shows down if you want to help keep OFMD up. Obviously vote how you like though :)

== Adopt Our Crew: Rhys Radness ==

So something I didn't cover yesterday was all the Rhys Radness going on over on Twitter! The first round of votes results were:

There are 4 categories: Movies, Commercials, Short Poppies, and Television

Todays options were:

Now one thing you'll notice, is the tv-show category between Stede Bonnet & Charles, and Steve and Murray got a bit out of hand. Most of the rest of the polls ranged in the 200-400 votes-- while those two ranged in the 7-9000K votes. Obviously somebody was having some bot fun. What's interesting is that during the day, once the bots started, they were heavily favoring Charles, and Murray, then the other half of they day they were heavily favoring Stede and Steve! We'll see who wins later tonight!

== Fan Spotlight! ==

Two more cast cards! This time Connor Barrett and Michael Crane! Our two captive Englishmen from Season 1! Thank you @melvisik for keeping these going :D

= MaxFanFaves =

Our dear crewmate @iamadequate1 has been hosting their own #MaxFanFaves on Twitter-- and its down to the final 4!

Coyote Vs Acme / Harley Quinn, and Our Flag Means Death / Gentleman Jack!

== Kudoboards closing soon =

Last chance! Thank you to @sharpenyersword on Twitter for setting up ALL THE KUDOBOARDS! Rhys' birthday kudoboard will close on the 20th, the rest will close on the 22nd.

Go send the cast and crew some love folks!

Rhys Darby's Birthday

David Jenkins

Nathan Foad

Con O'Neill

Ruibo Qian

Leslie F*cking Jones!

Matthew Maher

Vico Ortiz

Samson Kayo

Alex "Ass Tonight" Sherman!

David Fane

Kristian "Wee John Wednesdays" Nairn!

Samba "BTS and Baking King" Schutte!

Fellow OFMD Fan Crew!

== Taika Kudo Board ==

LAST DAY FOR TAIKA!

= Watch Parties =

== Wrecked ==

There are sources being passed around. If access is an issue, DM @iamadequate1 on Twitter or Tumblr

Season 3 watch from March 18th to March 22nd.

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST. Watch two episodes per day. Episodes are 21-22 minutes each. Use the following Saturday for the tags/watch if interested but not able to make this time.

Hashtags:

#WreckedPirates

#SaveOFMD

#RhysDarbyFaction

New watch parties!

Movie: Boy Date: Sunday March 31st at Time: 10am EST / 2pm GMT. We're watching Boy (2010) Hosted By: @tillychmo & @regg_official Location / Hastags: TBA

== Fundraiser Statuses ==

eSIMS and Sanitary Products for Gaza

03/10/24 - $5689 / 191 Supporters / 71 %

03/11/24 - $5814 / 194 Supporters / 72%

03/18/24 - $6558 / 248 Supporters / 81%

Getting close all!

= In Soup Now =

03/10/2024 - £925 / 39 supporters / 18%

03/11/2024 - £1183 / 47 supporters / 23%

03/18/24 - £1833 / 69 supporters (nice) / 36%!

Still going-- 12 days left!

== Love Notes ==

Hey Lovelies. It's that time again. Time for me to gush over you for a bit.

Look at you! Go look at yourself in the mirror. Whether you see dark circles under your eyes, someone you can't recognize, or someone feeling put together --- You're gorgeous inside and out.

You are a tenacious, strong, amazing person, and whether you are where you want to be or not, you are making progress.

You're doing so well, even when it feels like you're not. Progress is so hard to gauge when you're living it-- but I know, because I talk to you all every damn day, that you are getting there. You bring out the best in every one around you, and you do so without even knowing it.

Even when things feel down, just know we can see you growing and you bring so much joy to our lives. I continue every day to be thankful for finding this little corner of the internet, for letting me meet each and every one of you.

Nothing can stop you lovelies-- nothing at all.

You're gonna get there, it just may take some time--

Remember to take breaks and get some rest if you can, it always makes things feel more manageable. But whatever you do, don't give up <3

We're here and we believe in you.

Love you crew, <3

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Tonight's theme-- Driving! ... or parking, in Murray's case. And NO this does not indicate who I voted for. Putting Murray vs Steve was cruel to be honest, how am I supposed to choose between those two!? Darby Gif Courtesy of: @ofmooshd This terrible Taika gif is courtesy of me, cause I was gonna put it in his sighting section then realized I could just put it here.

#ofmd #our flag means death #daily ofmd recap #daily ofmd recaps #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #taika waititi #rhys darby #kristian nairn #rachel house #samba schutte #leslie jones #leslie fucking jones #kudoboard #ofmd bts #save ofmd #long live ofmd #save ofmd crew #adopt our crew

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nitewrighter · 3 months

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Who in the DC universe has a podcast?

-Leslie Willis (Podcast's official description is "current events and humor," but is in fact 90% shit talking. Has an absolutely banger weekly indie music recommendation tho.)

-Ronnie Troupe (SUPER SOCIALLY-CONSCIOUS DEEP DIVES. METICULOUSLY RESEARCHED. WORKS CITED LISTS AS LONG AS YOUR ARM. Would probably be an INCREDIBLE video essayist but they just like the audio format better.)

-Jimmy Olsen (Deep dives. Insane edition. Frequently brings guests on and it's like "How the fuck did you get ahold of DOCTOR FATE." 80% of people who listen to it think its some kind of parody but he is in fact telling the truth.)

-Harley and Ivy (Lifestyle, humor, and activism. Listeners call in for advice about relationship and mental health issues, as well as tips for gardening and sustainable living. There are noticeable cutoffs where you can tell they had to edit out Ivy doxxing or threatening an oil executive with murder mid-answer about succulent care.)

-Mr. Terrific (Discussions on technology's impacts on society as well as physical and mental health. Midnighter calls in frequently to just be an antagonizing asshole. Has lots of cool guests in various scientific fields as well as professional athletes, but really went viral when they managed to have Lex Luthor as a guest and he had a complete meltdown on-air.)

#dc

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dyslexicandakeyboard · 3 months

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Some Reverse!BatFamily Headcannons

(I have a reverse!BatFamily AU. Some things never change but a lot of things do so this is just for fun)

Damian is a vegan and has been since he was quite young due to his love of animals and that he once choked on a chicken bone.

Jason reads fanfiction of Pride and Prejudice and is a author of a viral ongoing fic that is a crossover of all of Jane Austen's works but set in a post apocalyptic world.

Dick has hypoglycaemia and is prone to fainting.

Bruce *turning to Dick*: Okay and you need to--DICK

Dick: *falling off the roof*

Cassandra can mimic the Kardashian's voices with startling accuracy and is a lover of most reality Tv.

Stephanie is not squeamish at all.

Bruce: *tries to not vomit as he watches Steph stuff her hand in a live person to get a bullet.*

Bruce got motion sickness as soon as he got the kids.

Duke learned to knit and crochet. But he hates it because he's the designated art and crafts kid in the house and so people just ask him to do shit for them for free.

Tim is still the shortest despite being the second oldest.

Damian went to college and got a Bachelors degree in environmentalism and a studied law at postgrad. He's a famous environmentalist lawyer. Family nicknames him Marshall to Damain's annonyence.

Dick wants to model for reasons (Kory) but Bruce won't let him unless he got a Olympic medal. Dick got one and Bruce has moved the goalpost to five Olympic gold medals. Dick has three.

Jason and Bruce are very similar in their interests and how they rebelled. It annoys them to no end and pleases Alfred.

Stephanie wants to become a gynaecologist when she's older and volunteers at the Leslie's clinic during the summer.

TIm is a slacker and gets the worst grades. He still hasn't graduated yet.

Bruce: How's your degree going

Tim: Well, you see, I'm taking engineering classes right now. I'm going to finish my actual degree but...

Cassandra accidentally scares all the batfamily due to her quietness.

Cass: *is living*

Jason *coming out of the bathroom*: FUCK

Bruce denies that he snores despite the batkids having evidence. He says that they're "fabricating evidence" and that "even if it was true" it's not "permissible in court" since it was obtain through "illegal means".

Alfred still treats Bruce like a child.

Jason's favourite food is burritos.

Bruce hosts weekly meetings to talk over their week and to announce things. Evey one hates it.

#dick grayson #jason todd #damian wayne #tim drake #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #duke thomas #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #reverse robin #funny #batfamily headcanons

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jasntodds · 9 months

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Petrichor [7]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb)

Words: 14,007

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, mentions of scars, mentions of a panic attack, manipulation, canon drug use, comic book science? Titans science? (author's note at the end lol), canon violence, blood, bruises, gore, breaking bones, mentions of nightmares, canon character death (I'm so sorry)

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work.Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

A/N: Happy birthday to Jason Todd!! So, sorry I did this for his birthday lmao I lied, this is longer than I thought it would be lol But I'm so sorry. I don't have anything else to say for myself besides canon made me do it and so did the comics lol I hope you guys like it!! If you want context from book 1, let me know and I’ll tell you!! You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

Over the next couple of weeks, Jason continues to go to therapy as directed by Bruce. To his surprise, it actually seems to be helping a little bit. He’s still having nightmares but they aren’t every night anymore. His hands aren’t shaking as badly either. He just feels a little bit better. Maybe Bruce and you were right about Leslie.

You and Jason are doing better, too. There have been moments where he’s gotten a little too frustrated but he remembers your talk and you give him a little bit of space until he’s ready to talk. It works for the both of you. You go on dates at least once a week and you both actually feel normal during the day. It’s not about being a vigilante and figuring out how to survive.

You go out on patrol three days a week instead of six. This is Jason’s thing and you know it bothers him. You can wait to patrol every night until he gets Robin back. It doesn’t bother you that much. And this way, you get to spend more time together and exist in a normal way that you desperately craved. You are a normal couple for once.

Above all of that, it’s been good. Things have been good. And while that is terrifying, you and Jason stick it out anyway. You don’t run or push. You both want to sometimes because it’s easier but you’re both fucking happy. So, you don’t. You don’t do it because losing each other is worse than anything the other could ever dish out. Running and pushing wouldn’t do either of you any good for the first time in your lives. So, you both enjoy the happiness together. Until things come to a screeching halt.

You're in the living room, having a FaceTime TV marathon with Gar when Bruce comes home. He offers a quick hello before trying to walk off but you call him anyway. He’s home a lot later than he should be since he went to pick up Jason. It was his request you stay back this time.

“Where’s Jason?” You question.

In all fairness, you wouldn’t be asking him normally but you also haven’t heard much from Jason since his therapy session ended. He said Bruce was taking him somewhere so he would be home later. And that was kind of the end of it. He’s been doing quite a bit better so you haven’t been as worried when he doesn’t text you back right away. But now Bruce is here without him.

“In the city.” Bruce answers plainly.

“Why? You went to pick him up?” You raise a brow and something happened. Jason texted you in the car. He was fine and with Bruce.

You look at the time and see that was a few hours ago.

“He’s upset. I’m giving him space. You should, too.” Bruce states.

“What did you do?” You deadpan, pulling up the text thread with Jason.

“I did not do anything.” Bruce defends. “He’ll be home soon.” Bruce states before he walks off.

“Everything okay?” Gar asks.

“Nope.” You shake your head. “I assume they got into some sort of fight again.” You roll your eyes. “Did he text you by chance?” You ask seeing the read receipt from a few hours ago.

Gar checks his phone and the last he heard from Jason was that morning. “No, he hasn’t texted me since this morning. What’s going on?”

You: you okay? Bruce said you’re upset what happened?

“I have no idea. He was fine earlier.” You let out a sigh, looking back at Gar through the tablet screen.

“You said he’s been better, right? Maybe he’s just blowing off steam from Bruce.” Gar suggests. Jason has shared some of the stuff that's happened and has complained a little about Bruce.

“Yeah, but if that’s the case, he usually comes to me to bitch about Bruce because I always agree with him.” You give Gar a grin just as your phone goes off.

Jaybird 🥰: fuck bruce I’m fine don’t worry

You: what happened? Do you want me to come get you?

“Well he texted me back and I was right, fight with Bruce.” You roll your eyes.

They fight sometimes, usually about Robin-related things or Jason wanting to do something reckless and Bruce putting a stop to it. Jason’s usually only a mad an hour or so before he’s fine and over it. Jason doesn’t hold very many grudges.

“Did he say about what?” Gar asks.

“Nope. Just said, fuck Bruce.”

Jaybird 🥰: no just wanna be alone still you and me love you ❤️

You: call or text every so often so I know you’re okay please I love you, too 🥰

“What’d he say?” Gar asks. He worries enough for the both of you/

“He wants to be alone and when Jason wants to be alone that is never good. But we have this thing where I let him be alone and then he tells me about it later. So, I guess I have to wait. If he isn’t home or texting me in a few hours, I’ll go look for him.” You reluctantly put your phone down. Giving Jason space is never easy.

“Think he’ll be alright?” Gar asks with worry in his voice.

“Yeah, him and Bruce fight sometimes. I’m sure it’s nothing too bad, Bruce probably just said something stupid and Jason was already in a mood.” You let out a sigh as the worry feeling gnaws at your stomach.

“Did you want to still—“

“Yeah, yeah, no. We can keep watching. He said he’ll text me.” You offer a soft smile while the two of you continue your show.

It’s not fair. It’s utter bullshit. Jason can’t help the way his blood is boiling and fuming while his hands shake. Bruce doesn’t think he’s good enough to be Robin. Bruce gave up on him. Jason is supposed to be his son and Bruce gave up on him anyway but he never gave up on Dick. If Jason weren’t so weak, this whole thing never would have happened. But he’s gonna prove to Bruce he can be Robin. He can be the best Robin and he can be a better Batman, too. He just needs a little help in the fear department.

He’s desperate. He tells himself this is a one-time thing. Fear creeps in his throat, grasping to be let out in the damp air. It’s a one-time thing, he tells himself. He’s out of options if he wants to be Robin. He’s out of options if he wants to keep the most important thing in his life. All he needs is a quick fix to fear and he’ll be back out there, better than he has ever been. He’ll prove it to Bruce. Bruce is wrong about him.

Bruce thinks he’s a mistake. He thinks Jason isn't worth the trouble just like everyone else. Bruce thinks Jason is weak. He thought Jason could replace Dick and he couldn’t. Not as Robin and not as Bruce’s son. But if he can get rid of his fear, he can show him how wrong he is. He isn’t just another mistake. He isn’t weak and he’s better than Dick. He swears this will be it. It won’t be bad. He can handle this. He swears it’ll all be fine. So, he hangs up on Leslie and heads inside the gates of Arkham Asylum as rain patters around him.

He’s a master manipulator. Jason knows that. It’s one of the things he’s best at. But the desperation for a cure to fear clouds every aspect of that. The desperation doesn’t let him see why Crane wants information for the cure. He can’t see Crane’s angel in his state of paralyzed desperation. And Jason has been manipulated before. He swears he’ll know if Crane is manipulating him because he knows what to look out for this time. But, desperation and the fear of being scared forever, go hand in hand. Fear and desperation cloud everything. He tosses his loyalty from the window as he gets closer to the formula. Crane gives him a piece of it with every piece of information Jason gives him.

“Tell me about the first Robin.” Crane offers this grin that sends a chill down Jason’s spine.

“Like what?” Jason huffs.

“His name, where he is, everything you know.”

“Dick Grayson. He’s in San Francisco and goes by Nightwing.” Jason explains, throwing Dick completely under the bus. He has a problem with Dick now anyway. Dick Grayson has always been the goody two shoes and Bruce’s favorite. Jason only got to be Robin because Dick abandoned Bruce. Jason was a filler. “He’s with the Titans. He got Deathstroke’s son killed and dropped me from a skyscraper.” Jason lets out a scoff.

“Interesting. Doesn’t seem to be the golden boy Bruce portrayed him as.” Crane grins and this is easier than he thought it would be. Jason has no problems rolling, apparently and Crane knows he’s going to use that to his advantage.

He’s broken. He’s desperate and Crane has the cure he wants. This is going to be easy and Crane gets all benefits. Jason lets him take down the Bat but in the best way. Crane is going to get the Bat’s son to turn on him and get rid of him. To break him. And then Dick Grayson and all of Gotham will follow. Crane finds the whole thing a little poetic. He can use him. And Jason will never see through it once he figures out the formula.

“Yep.” Jason answers simply, wanting to get this over with and Crane offers him a piece of the formula.

“The Titans. Who are they?” Crane asks, hiding the malicious intent behind curiosity.

Jason looks up to him and he doesn’t like to throw some of the others under the bus. But Crane is here. He can’t do anything. And most of them thought he was just Dick’s weaker replacement anyway. They gave up, too.

“Rachel Roth, Raven. Hank Hall, Hawk. Dawn Granger, Dove. Kory Anders, Starfire. Conner Kent, Superboy. Gar Logan, Beast Boy.” Jason pauses, waiting to see if Crane knows more.

Of course, he does. He’s in Arkham, not living under a rock. The Bat gains a new sidekick and everyone knows about it. Crane is only taking a guess the new sidekick also was a Titan based on when you showed up and your close proximity with Robin, himself. He saw Jason’s hesitance on his face. The fear.

Crane chuckles softly. “Aren’t you missing someone, pal?” Crane asks, almost a little too warmly. “Could have sworn there was one more.”

Jason grits his teeth and he’s so sorry.

When he came up with this plan, he had a feeling Crane would want information. He came prepared for it. Part of that preparation was leaving you the hell out of it. Not you. Crane can’t know about you. Anyone but you. But he does know. He already knows you're a Titan and he already knows you work for Bruce. Jason has no choice if he wants the formula. And he is so sorry.

Jason says your name with bitterness on his tongue. “Bluejay. She doesn't really like the name thing though.” Jason answers.

Crane has a soft smile. “She’s the new bird. So many of you are birds.” Crane chuckles. “I do find it interesting you would try to leave her out of it. She’s the new edition to Batman. Let me guess,” Crane boasts around his cell. “Your girlfriend.”

Not you. You've done everything you can to save him and help him. He loves you. Not you. Anyone but you.

“No.” Jason answers. “Just friends.” He bites the words because maybe Crane doesn’t know for sure you’re together and he wants you at arm's length.

“If you want the formula, you really shouldn’t lie to me.” Crane has a sinister smile. “You wouldn’t leave her out of it if you were just friends.” Crane lets the words fall with ease.

He’s so fucking sorry.

“Yeah, okay fine. Girlfriend.” Jason spits.

He knows you’ll never forgive him if you find out. You can’t tell Molly anything but he’s here telling Crane everything. You're going to hate him. But he needs a cure. He can’t feel this way forever. He can’t do it. He doesn't think he’ll be able to live like this anymore.

“Ah, young love.” Crane smiles with that shrug of his shoulders. You're going to be an interesting obstacle in this one. He’s already trying to protect you from this. Crane knows he needs to break that bond as fast as he can if he wants this plan to work. “I want to know about her.” There’s this look that crosses Crane’s eyes and Jason almost turns around.

But he doesn’t.

“Why? She’s not with the fucking Titans and she hates Bruce. She works with him because of me. That’s it. She got a suit out of it and a place to stay.”

“I’m a bit of a romantic, myself. Love stories are cute. Always having someone on your side, through thick and thin. It is quite romantic, don’t you think? If we’re going to work together, I want to know why she’s so important to you.” Crane grins. “You can trust me, boy. We want the same things and the way the Bat has treated you…it’s so cruel. But I, I believe in you. That’s why I’m helping you. You trust me, don’t you?”

You're going to kill him. Guilt chews at his limbs. His jaw squares and he thinks swallowing his own teeth would be easier than this. But he has to. Maybe Crane is being sincere. Jason thinks he is. At least enough. Maybe if Jason tells him enough, Crane will see you aren’t a problem. Maybe he’ll see you would side with them. You want Gotham to be better, you don’t agree with Bruce’s ways. Maybe Crane will understand. He’s helping Jason, maybe he can help you. You're scared, too.

“Dick found her.” Jason answers reluctantly. “She joined the Titans. We went after Deathstroke together. Got kidnapped and dropped from the skyscraper. Dick saved her. CADMUS attacked her, Gar, and Conner when I was gone. Dick left them alone when shit hit the fan. CADMUS left her for dead. So, she came back to Gotham.” Jason explains.

“She was there with Deathstroke.” Crane lets out a sigh and like Bruce, in a way, he can always tell when someone could need him. Someone who’s been traumatized. His intentions aren’t as pure as Bruce’s. “But Dick saved her and not you. Did you save her?”

“It wasn’t like that.” Jason shakes his head. “Dick tried to save me first and dropped me. Then he saved her. But yeah,” Jason nods. “I protected her and she did the same shit for me.”

“The two of you went through something so traumatic together. That really must have brought you closer. It’s not as romantic as I was hoping for but it is quite nice.” Crane grins. “She has powers, doesn’t she?”

“Acid generation.” Jason stares, leaving out the combat clairvoyance and the possibility of you having sharp shooting abilities. Two things Crane can’t prove Jason lied about.

“Now that is interesting. Does she know you’re here right now? Asking for my help?”

“No.” Jason shakes his head. “Look, she’s got nothing to with this shit. But, I can get her on our side. The other Titans targeted me for all types of shit I didn’t do and she was the only one on my side. She’s not a fucking problem. I can handle her.”

Crane grins and that’s all he needs. Jason is already hiding something huge from you. The distrust will be there and Jason doesn’t know Crane’s whole plan. If it goes the way he thinks it will, it’ll break your relationship. He will have no one left besides Crane. Exactly how he wants it. So, he decides he’ll let Jason think he believes this whole thing and moves back to the Titans.

“I do hope you’re right.” Crane sighs. “Tell me everything that happened in San Fransisco, with all of the Titans.”

Jason lets out a sigh before he spills every piece of information. He tells him everything from Trigon to Deathstroke to CADMUS. He tells him about the Titans turning on him for something he didn’t do, you talking him off the roof. Dick's confession and Donna’s death. Everything.

Then he tells Crane everything he knows about Bruce. The manor, the Batcave. Everything. He tells Crane about his training and the cabin, how Bruce found him and how Bruce found Dick. He spills and Crane lets him talk. Crane listens a lot but asks questions where he finds needed but he mostly just lets Jason talk as Jason keeps you out of it as much as he can. Jason is far more cooperative when it comes to everyone else.

Crane figures once he figures out the formula, he can get more information on you and use it against him if he needs to. He can’t have anyone if this is going to work and Crane knows exactly how he’ll be able to accomplish it. But for now, it’s about the Titans and Bruce. By the time Jason finishes, he’s got the formula tucked away in his pocket, ready to let fear go.

Jason pulls his phone from his pocket once he’s far enough away from Arkham. He’s spent the walk running over every lie he could tell you. Guilt eats at him with every step he takes. You're gonna kill him. He’s gonna lie to you because he knows for a fact, you’ll freak out. You’ll think he’s gone off the deep end and you’ll tell Dick. You’ll drag him kicking and screaming out of Gotham. You’ll tell Arkham and he won’t be able to see Crane again. It’s not fair and it’s not right. But you can’t know. And a part of him finds that to be unfair, too because he’s gonna fix his fear while you have to suffer with yours. That’s not fair to you. So, he thinks.

Maybe he can figure out a way to bring it up without bringing it up. Maybe he can try to see how you’d feel about a way to get rid of fear. If you seem for it, then he can tell you. He can see if you want to help. But the more he thinks about that, the more he thinks about Crane.

You’d have to be involved with him. Jason doesn’t want you involved with him. Not him. And he knows, the second he tells you about Crane, you’ll lose it. Even if you want a cure-all. You’ll bail the second you hear about Crane. You would never work with a guy like that. So, he has no choice. It’s that or end it and he doesn’t want to do that either.

“Hey.” Jason says as you pick up the phone.

“Jay? Where are you? I’ve been texting you to make sure you were okay.” He can hear your worry and he thinks maybe the anti-fear drug will make him not worry. Maybe you don’t want to worry so much.

“I’m sorry.” Jason clears his throat. “I needed to clear my damn head. I’m fine. Can you come get me, please?”

“Yeah, of course. Where are you?” You answer and Jason can hear you rustling on the other end.

“I’ll text you the address.” Jason states. “Thanks.”

“Of course.” You hang up and get to your feet while Jason texts you the address.

When you reach Jason, he’s soaked. Your heart aches, feeling like it’s being squeezed right through your rib cage at the sight of him. He looks exhausted and lost. He looks distant and he is drenched from the winter rain. Something bad happened and you have no idea how you're going to be able to help.

You take off your helmet, not getting off the bike. “Jay, are you okay?”

Jason gets up from the curb and walks up to you, offering you a fake smile. “Yeah.” His jaw clenches and he doesn’t even want to go home. He doesn’t want to see Bruce. He’d rather be outside in the cold. “All good.”

“What happened?” You reach out but Jason dodges you, reaching for his helmet. A lump grows in your throat. He doesn’t dodge you. Not like that.

“Bruce took Robin away.” Jason’s voice cracks as he shakes his head.

He dodges your stare. He doesn’t want to see the look you’ll give him. On the one hand, he’ll feel guilty. He’ll feel guilty for lying and talking to Crane. And on the other, you’ll give him a look that screams pity and that is the last thing he needs. Jason Todd doesn’t need anyone’s pity.

“What do you mean?” You question.

“Like fucking permanently. He said I can’t be Robin anymore.” Jason lets out a bitter scoff as he feels the anger come back to his bloodstream.

“Jay, I’m so sorry.” You say softly.

You never thought Bruce would take it away like that. Jason has been doing everything Bruce asked him to do. Ever since the Pete Hawkins thing, Jason has backed off entirely. He is putting a real effort into therapy, really trying to let the process help. Why would Bruce rip it away from him?

“Fuck him. I’m gonna fucking show him he’s wrong. He's fucking wrong about me.” Jason grits his teeth.

“He is.” You nod your head. “Come on. Let’s get you home and warm and we can talk more, okay?”

“Whatever.” Jason scoffs, popping his helmet on before he gets on the back and holds onto you while you drive back to the manor.

You get Jason back to the manor and into a warm shower. He says almost nothing. It’s as if he’s completely numb and it breaks you to see him like this. Jason is anything but quiet in a shower with you, usually. And he’s always handsy and cheeky. But, tonight, he’s just quiet, going through the motions, stuck on his own head.

You don’t understand how Bruce could take Robin away like that. It’s not fair. Jason does what Bruce asks him to and he messes up sometimes but that’s normal. How does he not see Robin is the most important thing to him? You even told him that. And he took Robin anyway. He never should have let him be Robin in the first place if this was something that could happen. Dick almost killed someone and he didn’t take Robin from Dick. Jason tries his best. Why isn’t that good enough for Bruce?

Dick was always right about him.

Jason plops onto your bed, his eyes red and puffy. His heart feels like it’s being crushed by cinderblocks. It all hurts. How did he really let another person down? How was he fooled into believing Bruce was different than everyone else? He thinks about his dad. His dad wasn’t a good person but Jason, sometimes, wonders if it was him. Maybe it was his fault his dad was like that. Maybe it was different before him. His dad didn’t choose to be his dad. But Bruce chose it. And still is giving up on him. Jason is Bruce’s son by choice, he thought the choice of picking a son, would make it different. But it’s the same old story Jason hates retelling.

He fucks up and people give up.

“Want me to rub your back while you tell me about it?” You offer as you stand in between his legs, looking down at him.

Jason looks up at you and you always worried so much. He wishes he could be better so you wouldn’t worry about him. He wonders why you choose him. You don’t have to, like Bruce. But you do. He wonders if one day you’ll stop. If his mom and his dad and his uncle and Dick and Bruce all chose other things over him, why wouldn't you? But he looks up at you and you give him this soft smile with your fingertips brushing his knees with care and he thinks you're still different than everyone else.

Jason cracks a soft smile. “Yeah, actually. Thank you.”

“Of course.” You smile softly.

Jason switches to his stomach, facing the TV just as you did the first day you started your friends-with-benefits situation. You sit on top of him and run your hands over his back. Your hands are cold, sending goosebumps up his spine. Your hands are always cold, something he always finds a bit ironic given the acid generation warms your hands. But your fingers are soft as you trace over the scars on his back. You do it every time and he always meant to ask.

“Why do you do that?” Jason asks, his eyes closed with his head on his hands.

“Do what?” You ask as you start rubbing his shoulders.

“Trace the scars.”

“I dunno.” You shake your head and you didn’t realize you did it often enough for him to notice.

You're not even sure why you do it. It’s something mindless. Maybe it’s your subconscious wishing if you trace them enough times, it’ll remove the damage the scars have caused him, like a magic eraser. Or maybe tracing the scars is confirmation he’s real.

Sometimes, you have a hard time believing he’s real. All of this is real. You used to dream of a life outside of the basement, sometimes they’d feel so real you could swear they were. Wishful thinking.

Maybe you trace them as confirmation that the raised and paled skin is real, Jason is here with you and you're not dreaming. Maybe you like the way the scars look on his skin but he managed to pull through all of his terrible shit and make it out the other end with a smart mouth and a heart of gold anyway. Maybe, you just do it because you care about him regardless of the scars and what made them.

“Does it bother you?” You ask softly.

“No.” Jason answers. “Just wondering.”

It always makes him feel vulnerable, a harsh reminder he is not invincible as much as he likes to believe he is sometimes. He might have survived those injuries but they’re there as harsh reminders. And you touch them and he thinks maybe you find comfort in them, because you have them, too. And that’s always enough for him. He thinks it makes him feel human and real and alive. He always feels a little exposed but it’s become comforting with you.

“What happened?”

He thinks he has his lies in order. He knows he might be sabotaging the relationship. Despite everything he thinks as you massage over the scar on his back, he knows. He knows you might not forgive him. There’s always a chance you won’t be so understanding when you inevitably find out because you always figure him out. But it's a risk he has to take.

He can’t keep doing this anymore. He can’t keep not sleeping. He can’t keep shaking and freezing. He can’t keep living like this. He knows he can’t. It’ll destroy him. It’ll be miserable. The idea of going back to being useless and not good enough and a disappointment, he can’t live like that. He needs help now, before Bruce finds his replacement. Maybe you’ll understand that part.

“He fucking said he made mistakes and I guess I’m fucking one of them.” Jason scoffs from under you.

You narrow your eyes thinking Bruce didn’t actually say that. You have no faith in Bruce to communicate worth a shit given your conversation with him and given Jason and Dick. And Bruce might be very good at hiding his emotions, but you know he actually cares about Jason. You don’t think Bruce would ever tell Jason he was a mistake, even if he thought it.

“He said that?” You ask, pausing for a few seconds.

“Basically!” Jason groans. “And he doesn’t want to make more mistakes and he said I can’t be Robin anymore. He thinks I’m a fucking mental case. He doesn’t care it’s important to me. He doesn’t care that I’m doing what he wants me to. It doesn’t matter to him. It’s fucking bullshit.” Jason’s voice shakes as his back tenses under your palms.

“That’s not fair. I don’t know why he would do that. You were always a great Robin.” You say softly.

You wish you could have heard the conversation so you would know better what to say. But, you also know, even if Bruce didn’t say any of that and it came out wrong, it wouldn’t change anything for you to decipher it for him. At the end of the day, Bruce could have outright told Jason he loves him and he doesn’t want him to die and Jason would still be absolutely crushed with Robin being ripped away from him. Bruce’s delivery of the message doesn’t matter. It doesn’t change anything.

“Just fucking tired of being scared.” Jason lets out a defeated sigh. “Fucking gave up on me. Ya know, thought he was fucking different.” His voice is etched in pain and you wish you could take it all away. He never deserves the pain he gets.

It’s honest. He can be honest with you about that. Maybe he wants you to figure it out.

“Yeah, I get it. Being scared really sucks. You’ll get better though. I know I keep saying it but it takes time, Jay. Bruce should be giving you more time.” You say. “I’m really sorry about him.” You lean down and press a kiss to his shoulder blade. “You still have me, okay?”

He knows. He’ll always have you. Somewhere inside of him, he knows. The anxiety of you freaking out and leaving when you figure it out is there, but he also knows he’s given you every opportunity to take off and run. And you never do. You’d understand his desperation. You'd understand why he lied. He knows he still has you.

“What if there were a cure for fear?” Jason asks and he’s glad you can’t see his face. You’d know.

“What do you mean?” Your brows furrow.

“What if there was a cure? Like we can just take it and not be scared anymore.” Jason listens carefully, feeling your hands pause on his back. He knows without looking that you've got your right eyebrow raised at him, your eyes narrowing at him as if you can’t decide if he’s joking or serious.

“I mean that’d be great, but there would be consequences, right?” You question.

You're a little concerned with the question. But, that’d be insane. It’d be insane for him to really look for a cure to fear. You swear he’s just talking, doing one of his hypothetical talks he does like you do about the zombie apocalypse.

“Like what? Being fearless sounds pretty fucking good right about now.” Jason scoffs.

“We’ll, fear is just adrenaline, right? But that fear also keeps you looking both ways before crossing the street, it alerts you when someone is following you home. Without fear, also means you won’t have excitement. You’ll probably be emotionally numb to a lot of things. Not having adrenaline is dangerous though.” You answer.

“Yeah, but isn’t that fucking better than being scared all the damn time? You’re afraid of everything, too and your nightmares are back. You wouldn’t want something to stop it?” Jason looks over his shoulder.

Your nightmares came back a week and a half ago. You and Molly were on a walk and ran into Jerry’s Gotham house. You still don’t know how you missed it, but you did. You were walking and having a good time and you saw the house and that was it. You broke and it’s like all of the progress you made over the last few months evaporated into the atmosphere. Molly had to call Jason because you were having a panic attack and couldn’t snap out of it. The nightmares came back that night.

“Of course, I would.” You shrug.

You think about it and maybe it would be nice. If nothing else, just so you could get some damn proper sleep. So, you both could get some proper sleep. Maybe if you both got some sleep, you’d be better. Maybe Jason makes a good point but then you think about how happy you are when you see him and when a new movie comes out and your marathons with Gar. You wouldn’t want to trade those feelings for being fearless.

“But not if it means getting rid of everything else. Adrenaline also keeps us alive. I’ve been numb and that’s worse than being scared. Why?” You ask. “You trying to find a cure to fear or something?”

“No.” Jason scoffs, letting out a fake laugh and he was really hoping you’d be on his side with this one. “Just fucking saying, wish there were a cure. At least so I can be Robin.”

“Look, it sucks, Jaybird. But I don’t think the answer to being Robin is being fearless. You had to use that fear to survive out there, too. You’re gonna be okay and then you can go out and be your own hero. You don’t have to be Robin. Dick quit and became Nightwing. You don’t need Bruce to help people.” You say. “And I still think you’re plenty good enough. I’m just saying, if Bruce won’t let you, do it yourself when you get better. You’re good enough.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Jason sighs. “Maybe you’re right but he doesn’t believe in me anymore.” Jason says and you know it’s never your approval he’ll need. And that’s okay but you wish sometimes, like tonight, it were enough. “I’m gonna prove him wrong.”

“Good, fuck Bruce.” You smile softly. “Just…give it a little bit, okay? Keep seeing Leslie, too. She’s been helping.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Jason huffs.

“I’m serious, Jason. You do sleep more now. Seeing her is helping, just keep up with it. And then we’ll go out together. Fuck Bruce. We’ll be our own team.” You let out a soft chuckle.

“Thanks.” Jason lets out a sigh.

You make good points but his mind is made up. He’s going to do this. He doesn’t have time to wait around and hope for the best. He isn’t going to Leslie. He’s going to make the anti-fear drug and he won’t be scared anymore. Maybe you're right. Maybe he’ll be numb to everything but he doesn’t care anymore. He is desperate for a cure. He needs it. Maybe he can only use it to be Robin, just to prove himself. It’ll be a quick fix and that’ll be the end of it. Just use it out there and to sleep. You make good points, but he has to do this. And he is so sorry he has to lie about it.

Jason turns from under you so he can face you and you place your hands on his chest. You have a soft smile and he feels so guilty but you’ll understand. You’ll get it when he can function better, it’s just until this whole shit wears off. You’ll get it. If anyone will, it’ll be you.

“Thanks for not giving up on me.” Jason places his hands on your thighs, his thumbs rubbing softly against your bare skin.

“You and me.” You smile softly.

“Yeah.” Jason smiles looking at the necklace hanging from your neck. You haven't taken it off since he gave it to you. “You and me.”

“You okay?” Your voice is filled with love as you ask. No one ever asked like that before.

“Yeah.” Jason answers simply. “Just glad you’re here.”

“You sure? I’m really worried about you.” Your brows knit together. “You know I’ll always be here. No matter what.”

“I’m not gonna walk off a roof, I swear.” Jason’s eyes widen as a grin tugs at the corner of his lips.

“Good. I just know this is bad for you. I just hope you believe me because I believe in you.”

Jason sits up and places his fingers under your chin. “Thanks. Look, I’ll be fucking fine. Trust me. I got a plan.” Jason offers you a grin.

“That’s still mildly unsettling coming from you.” You smile. “What’s the plan?” You widen your eyes as your hands come to his shoulders, a teasing smirk coming to your lips.

“You’ll see.” Jason drops his hand to your waist.

“Oh, you’re not gonna tell me?” You laugh.

“What’s that you always say?” Jason teases. “We don’t always get what we want.” And he says your name, it comes out a little groveled but his voice is teasing.

“Shut up.” You groan.

“Do you trust me?” Jason asks as his hands squeeze your hips softly.

“Of course, I do. You know I do.” You answer.

“Trust me then. I got a plan. I’ll be back out there and proving everyone else wrong.” Jason holds his head with confidence.

You raise a brow at him. “Why do I have a bad feeling about that?” Jason and plans aren’t always a bad combination but he is desperate and hurt right now. You remember the last plan he had when he felt this way.

“Don’t. I got this. Like you said, I’ll be fine.” Jason presses a kiss to your lips.

“Right yeah, you will be.” You let out a sigh and you think it can’t be that bad. He’d tell you. “Okay. You’ll tell me through, right?”

“Of course, you and me.” Jason gives you a wild grin.

He hopes you won’t be mad.

The next day, Jason rents an apartment and sets up to work on making the anti-fear drug. ?You had plans with Molly anyway and that was the perfect excuse for him to get here all by himself to get to work. Plus, Bruce had to go out of town so that's one less person he has to worry about.

He feels guilt gnawing at his stomach like a bad stomach ulcer. But he works anyway. He works through it because this is the only way. And even if he wanted to back out, he already told Crane everything. If he wanted to back out, Crane could use that information against him. But, he doesn’t want to back out anyway, so he pushes the guilt and anxiety away as he puts together a botched drug.

You grow suspicious over the next few days. Jason is making weird and random excuses not to hang out. He’s always trying to get you to hang out more with Molly or for you to head to Excellent Gotham and get to know Tim better. You always need more friends, apparently. Normally, you wouldn’t think too much of it. Or you’d be worried he was distancing himself to leave. But it’s Jason and he’s definitely hiding something, so you follow him one day.

Your phone rings as you hide in the alley beside the building Jason walked into.

“Hello?” You ask.

“Why are you following me?” Jason asks.

He caught onto you following him a few blocks from the apartment he’s been using. He was Robin and a street kid, he knows when someone is following him. And he feels bad about it. For you to follow him, you have to be really worried. He doesn’t track you unless you get kidnapped and you don’t track him on his phone. You don’t follow each other. But you are. And he needs to find a way to assure you.

“I—“ You pause. “I-I’m not following you.” You scoff.

“Yeah, you are.” Jason states as he walks through the opposite end of the alley.

“Why do you think that?” You raise, crossing your arm across your chest.

“I can see you.” Jason answers, pulling the phone away from his ear as you jump, turning around to see Jason.

To be fair, you should have known he'd figure it out. But, you tried to be subtle and keep a far enough distance away from him. You put in a lot of effort. He's just more vigilant than you are, apparently.

“Oh, hey, Jay.” You give him a cheeky smile with a nervous laugh. “Whatcha doing?”

You might be following him. You might be figuring it out a little sooner than he'd personally like. But, he does find it a little cute. And a little amusing you really thought Jason wouldn't figure it out.

“Walking, what’re you doing, babe?” Jason quips, closing the rest of the distance between you.

You sigh in defeat. “Following you.”

Jason lets out a hearty laugh. “No shit. Why?”

“You’ve been…weird, sneaking around. Worried about you.” You groan as you scrunch your nose.

He's really not trying to worry you. He doesn't want you to worry about him anymore. Even if you would be completely against an anti-fear drug, a part of him thinks maybe if he has it, you won't have too many reasons to worry about him anymore. The way Jason sees it, he was always better off with less fear. Maybe the drug helping him, will help you. In a roundabout way.

“You don’t have to worry. I’m just working on something, alright?” He’s giving you that toothy grin that is always trouble.

“Right…that’s not nearly as reassuring as you think it is.” You quip back, the smile falling short.

“It’s a surprise, alright? Don’t worry so much.”

“A surprise?” You raise a brow.

“A surprise.” Jason echoes and it’s not technically a lie. “You said you trust me.”

“I do.” You groan. “I’m sorry. You just never sneak around. It’s weird, even for you.”

You chew the inside of your cheek and maybe you're being paranoid. You've always been a little on the paranoid side, especially since Jerry. And the paranoia decided to come back in full force with the nightmares. Maybe you're just paranoid, more worried about losing him. Things have been good, between you at least, you always get scared when things are good for too long.

Jason puts his hands on your shoulders. “I’m fine, babe. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“Promise?” You ask.

“Promise.” Jason nods.

“Fine.” You sigh, taking his arms off of your shoulders and holding his right hand. “Just…whatever you’re up to, be careful.”

“Always.” Jason beams, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “I’ll see you at home, yeah?”

“Yeah, okay.” You sigh, kissing him softly.

“Love you.” Jason grins, walking past you.

“I love you, too.” You watch him walk off and you really have a bad feeling about this one. But you can’t follow him and you have no reason not to trust him. So, you let him walk as you head back the way you came.

The next day, Jason gets the formula right. He uses an inhaler to take it and every fear he has ever had, melts away. It works. He did it. He got his cure to fear. So, he heads back to Arkham, high on the drug to confirm to Crane he got it despite the shotty formula.

And Crane already had a plan in motion. He had a feeling Jason would figure it out. So, he set up a plan and it’s time for the plan to go into motion so they can make Gotham theirs. Crane needs Jason to prove it works. What better way than to have him face off with the Joker alone? That’ll surely prove it. But, what Jason doesn’t know, is that Crane knows the downside to life without fear. Of course, he does. He’s the expert in it. Crane already has someone on the outside ready to handle it when this does not go the way Jason thinks it will. But is it perfect for Crane, another thing to hold over Jason’s head to control him.

And Jason doesn’t see the motive. So, Crane tells him to go after the Joker to prove it works and prove to the Bat he can do this. Jason doesn’t need Bruce. He can take care of the Joker all by himself. Jason, lacking all apprehension and self-preservation thanks to the drug, agrees easily. He’s not scared of him.

That next night, Jason convinces you to run out to the store. You were talking about needing some supplies for your scrapbook. You're reluctant at first, but decide to go. It’ll be quick. And Jason gets to work tracking the Joker.

But, with Jason at home, something just does not feel right to you. You make it all the way to the store, hoping the feeling will it go away, but it doesn't. So, you decide to call Molly, maybe Molly can talk you down.

“Hey.” Molly chimes through the phone.

“Hey, you busy?” You ask as you sit on the bike outside of the store.

“No, what’s up?”

You pause. It’s eating at you. Jason was weird as fuck last night when he came home and he’s been weird today. Convincing you to go to the store was weird. Him not coming with is also weird. And you have that feeling in the pit of your stomach. You shouldn’t have left.

“You….uh, I don’t know. I think I’m having a bad feeling so I just…need to talk I think.” You shake your head, the helmet weighing on your head a bit.

“What’s going on? Where’s Jason?” Molly asks.

“Home.” You answer. “I went to the store, he didn’t wanna come.”

“Is everything okay with you guys?”

“Yeah, yeah, all good. Not, uh, not what I wanted to talk about actually.”

“What’s going on?”

“Uh…do you…you know when something bad is gonna happen like really bad and you just….get this feeling? Like…right in the center of your stomach?”

You think you're being paranoid. It only happened once when your mom died. But since Jerry, you're always paranoid and the feeling comes back. Sometimes it’s wrong. Sometimes, it’s just you being paranoid. And you know that’s what this has to be because what could possibly happen to Jason at the manor?

“Yeah.” Molly nods her head because it happened with her mom. She just knew. “You have that feeling?”

“Yeah…I don’t know. Sometimes it's wrong. But it just…I don’t know. Feels bad.” You let out a sigh.

“When did it start?”

“Right before I left. Like, I got on the bike and I just….I don’t know. I think I’m gonna go home.” You shake your head and you can go home. You can always come back tomorrow.

“Are you sure? I mean...what if it’s a coincidence? Two’s a coincidence.” Molly tries to assure you.

“Yeah, I know but….what if it’s not? Can you stay on the phone with me while I get back?” You just can’t do it. It’s not a big deal.

“Yeah, of course.” Molly nods her head and you start the bike, taking off back to the manor. “What do you think it is?” Molly asks, mostly to talk you down.

“I don’t know.” You answer. “Jason’s been acting weird lately. I don’t know. I can’t explain it. It’s not….he’s…something’s off with him and I don’t know why I came. He told me to and maybe I listen to him a little too much sometimes. He said he was fine but I don’t know. I got a real bad feeling.” You groan.

“How far are you from the manor?”

“Like twenty minutes.”

“Well, if something is going on, you’re not that far and you haven’t been gone long. He couldn’t have gotten into too much trouble.” Molly tries to assure you but it doesn’t work.

The more you talk, the more paranoid you get. You know Molly is right. He couldn’t have gotten into too much trouble in the last half hour. But you worry anyway.

“Yeah, hey, can you conference him in? Just…give me some piece of mind before I get back.”

“Yeah, of course.” Molly states as she pulls the phone away from her ear and adds Jason to the call. The two of you listen as the phone rings and rings and rings. And then goes to voicemail.

“Fuck.” You let out a scoff as panic starts to flood your system.

“Maybe he’s--”

“No, he’d answer if it were you while I’m out. Call again.” You state and Molly does as told, getting voicemail again. You shake your head and you pull the throttle back, kicking the bike into third.

“Slow down.” Molly urges. “I’m sure he’s fine. Maybe he’s just in the bathroom.” Molly says as she hears the bike rev further.

“He’d answer. I know he would. Double calls. He would because why would you call him twice in a row unless it were important?” You argue.

You're begging for you to be wrong. You hope against everything in your body you're wrong. This one time, you have to be wrong.

“Okay, so what do you think is going on?” Molly asks.

“I don’t know!” You groan. “That’s the problem. I have no idea what’s been going on with him. I followed him a few days ago and he brushed it off. Like it was no big deal but he was sneaking around behind my back. He said he was planning something or some shit. Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean.”

“You don’t think he’s like cheating--”

“No! Of course, not. He would never. I….” You bite your tongue because Molly doesn’t know about Robin. “I don’t know what the fuck he’s been doing but now he’s not answering. And I got this feeling. Hold on I’m at a stop light.” You groan, quick-dialing Jason as you watch the red light. The two of you listen as it goes to voicemail. And you try again. Voicemail. “Something’s wrong.” You say as the light turns green and you start weaving between cars.

“Because he’s not answering and you have a feeling? You sound paranoid.”

“I know.” You grit your teeth. “But he’d answer for me. I know he would. Especially calling him twice. He’d answer. I just...remember a few weeks ago when he got his ass kicked?”

“Yeah.” Molly wishes she could forget.

“Okay, so what if he went out on his own to try that guy again or something?” You spit, avoiding details about Robin because you're thinking he’s out Robining alone for some sort of spite against Bruce. He’s still mad. And maybe he froze and it got bad.

“Why would he do that?”

“Because he’s Jason.” You let out a breath.

You get back to the manor, switching the call to your phone instead of your helmet. You make your way into the manor and call for Jason. The manor is silent. It’s not even like that’s abnormal. Jason isn’t really loud and neither is Bruce. But, the quiet and lack of Jason answering is eery and unsettling.

You search your rooms and living rooms and kitchens. He’s nowhere to be found and your heart sinks further. So, you go to the Batcave. Hoping maybe, he’s just training. Maybe Molly is right. Maybe he’s just busy. Maybe his phone died and he didn’t realize it. That’s possible. It’s Jason. He isn’t the type that’s glued to his phone. Maybe.

But that hope dies as you reach the Batcomputer, seeing Amusement Mile pulled up with the Joker’s location.

No, no, no, no.

“I’m sure he went out and he’ll be--”

“Fuck!” You yell as you look to the display case. The Robin suit is gone.

Molly calls your name and now she’s worried.

“What a fucking---” You cut yourself off as you grit your teeth. “Molly, I gotta go.”

“Molly yells your name, her voice now completely panicked.

“I can’t. I’m sorry. I’ll call you. I have to call Bruce.” You rush as you hang up, running over to your own display case holding your suit. You rip the case open and grab the suit as you put Bruce on speaker. “Bruce!?” You yell into the phone as you jump around, getting the suit on as fast as you can.

This can’t be happening. The Joker? Of all fucking people, that’s who he decides he’s going to go after to prove himself? Why the hell would he ever do that? You try your best not to focus on the millions of questions you have for him and the fact you're ready to scream at him for the twenty-four hours. You have to focus because it’s the fucking Joker. He’s taken too much from you.

Bruce can hear the absolute panic in your voice. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s Jason! I fucking told you! He went after the fucking Joker!” You scream into the phone as you zip the front of your suit and put the mask over your mouth.

“I told him not to.” Bruce says calmly, but a part of him is panicking.

Bruce doesn’t panic but there is no way you would be calling him and telling him this if it weren’t true. Jason knows better. Why would he go after the Joker? On his own?

“Oh, because Jason is so fucking good at following instructions?!” You run over to the weapons once you're completely suited up.

On the one hand, Bruce could send you after him. That’s at least, two against one. But, it’s the Joker. And Bruce knows he’s more ruthless than anyone. It’s a fun game to him like whack-a-mole. And the prize is always bloodshed. He also knows how you feel and if he sends you, not only could you go out and get killed but you could kill him first. That’s a life on Bruce’s conscious.

“Do not go anywhere. I’m on a flight—“

“No! You don’t get to tell me to fucking sit here and hope for the fucking best. He is everything to me and I am not gonna sit here and let him get fucking killed, Bruce!” You seeth and the Joker should have been killed a long fucking time ago. You swear, if the Joker even lays a single finger on him, you’ll do it her damn self. Bruce is too much of a coward of what he could become if he did it. You don’t care. “The Robin suit is gone, the Joker is gonna fucking kill him and it’s all your fault!” You scream as you gather knives.

“Stay put.” Bruce is stern on the other line. “It will be dangerous and you aren’t prepared--”

“No! Fuck you!” You snip back, gathering as many knives as you can carry. “I’m gonna save him, kill the damn Joker since you’re too damn cowardly to do it and then I’m calling Dick.” You fume on the other end. “I’m gonna beg him if I have to to come and bring us back to San Franciso because fucking clearly, he’s worse off here!” You scream before hanging up the phone and heading towards the exit.

It’s not that he’s scared or even feeling uneasy. His head is clouded with a sense of nothing. Everything is just numb as he cuts the chain into the amusement park.

Jason should be scared and there’s a gnawing at the back of his head that is screaming and howling for him to be scared. To turn around. This is a bad idea. This is bad. There are red flashing lights begging him to turn around but that sense of adrenaline that would normally kick in and give him a little bit of common sense and self-preservation is being suppressed. It doesn’t exist. So, the normally loud and blinding lights that have been causing him so much pain over the last few months, aren’t loud enough. They’re useless.

As he walks further into the amusement park, he finds old and run-down games that grab his attention. This is the Joker’s hideout. It’s known. Of course, the maniac clown would like a closed amusement park. And Jason knows he should be hypervigilant. This is the Joker’s turf and he knows the Joker is here. But the drug keeps suppressing that, too.

He knows he should be more aware and more on guard but the drug gives him a false sense of confidence. He can do this. It’s the Joker. He’s just some crazy clown and if Bruce can take him down several times, Jason can do it. Bruce trained him, right? He knows better though. He should be scared and more aware. but then there’s a noise from behind him and he jumps anyway.

His heart skips before plummeting back into a resting rhythm as he spots a dead man with a creepy smile tugged on display. Jason’s eyes widen and there’s this small, tiny bit of fear that seems to bypass the anti-fear drug like a leaky faucet. And Jason starts to hear and see the red flashing lights in the back of his head in perfect color. But the point is that he isn’t supposed to feel fear at all.

Maybe his formula is a little off. How is he feeling any sense of fear? It’s barely there, barely even noticeable but it’s there enough where if he were in a normal state of mind, that alone would send him into a panic. He’d panic about being worried he’s going to panic. And that thought with the mixing of the drug, makes him miss the creeping steps of the Joker from behind him.

With a quick swing, a crowbar connects to Jason’s head and he’s sent right to the ground.

His head throbs and aches, a horrendous and shooting pain sending his head into a spin as his stomach turns. Blood drips down from his forehead, the warm liquid seeping down his cheek as he looks up to see the menacing and sadistic smile of the Joker looking down at him just as he pulls his arm back for another swing.

This swing connects with his jaw and Jason can hear the bone break. Jason’s mouth pools with blood, the taste of iron already becoming more nauseating. He groans out in agony as the Joker takes another hit to his head, his laugh echoing through the park.

His laugh rings through Jason’s ears with every blow and Jason thinks that laugh can penetrate any type of anti-fear drug. His hearing seems to get worse and worse but that laugh could pierce through solid steel. And he’s not supposed to be scared anymore.

But the Joker hits him again and Jason coughs up blood and fear starts to rush into his veins. Maybe it’s the overwhelming amount of adrenaline making the anti-fear drug wear off a lot sooner than it should. Maybe his formula needs to be tweaked. Maybe the anti-fear drug has a side effect, maybe it doesn’t work when he’s on the brink of death. Jason can’t think straight enough to figure it out. Instead, all he thinks is that he has never been more terrified than he is right now.

SMACK

WHACK

CRACK

Jason’s bones break as Joker takes a break from his face and works on his side and then his arms and legs. He swears this is the worst pain he has ever been in. The Joker hits him over and over and over again, the pain getting worse and worse as tears brim his eyes. He claws at the ground in desperation, a failing attempt to move away. But, the bones are being broken one by one and he can feel the shards with every movement. And he is so fucking sorry.

SMACK

He’s so sorry to Bruce because he should have listened. He should have been a better Robin. He should have listened. He’s so sorry he wasn’t better. He’s so sorry he wasn’t a better son. He tried his absolute best but he could have tried harder. Maybe he could have told Bruce what was going on. Maybe he could have told Bruce more about therapy. Maybe he could have explained anything that ever happened with him. Maybe he could have just tried to be a son. He’s so sorry and all he wants to do is tell Bruce he’s sorry. And thank you.

He wants to thank Bruce for trying. For taking him in. Letting him be his son and letting him be Robin. Bruce, in his weird way, cared about him and loved him. He tried even if he sucked at it sometimes. Jason wants to tell Bruce thank you.

SMACK

Jason screams as the crowbar finally shatters one of his ribs. His breathing is becoming ragged as the Joker takes another swing to Jason’s chest. The Robin suit offers a lot of protection but the Joker is relentless. He’s getting off on every scream and groan and gasp Jason lets out. It’s as if the sight of the blood seeping onto the ground and the backswing of splatter gets him off. He’s having the time of his life beating Jason to death. And Jason has never been more scared.

SMACK

He’s so scared and sorry. He’s so fucking sorry to you and he would give anything to tell you that right now. All he wants to do is call you. He wants to take it all back. He wants to go back home and crawl into your bed with you. He wants to hug you and kiss you and promise he’s doing okay and he’ll be okay. And you’ll be okay. He wants to promise you that it’ll all work out in the end, even if he doesn’t make it. He wants to tell you not to be mad or sad because he doesn’t deserve it. You don’t deserve to dwell on his inevitable death.

You both knew it was going to be him. You liked to fool yourself into thinking maybe it would be you but at the end of the day, you both knew it would always be him. Jason always knew it was gonna be him who died first. And he wants nothing more than to promise you it’ll be okay. You’ll be okay. He doesn’t want you to run yourself into the ground over him. But he knows you and he knows as the Joker takes another horrendous and agonizing hit to his skull, you’ll be miserable. This will be it for you. He’s not gonna make it and you're gonna lose your entire mind. You always said you would. And it’s all his fault.

SMACK

CRACK

He wants to shake you and tell you he’s so fucking sorry. He should have just told you what was going on. He should have told you. You would have helped him. You wouldn’t have been mad or yelled at him. Of all people, you would have understood why he went to Crane. You would have gotten it. You always understood him. And he should have told you.

He shouldn’t have lied to you. He’s so fucking sorry. And he’s so sorry for not loving you better, you deserve someone who’s not gonna do this. You deserve someone who’s not gonna get killed and didn’t even stand a damn chance. And he is so sorry he’s going to leave you alone.

He doesn’t think he’s gonna make it.

The Joker's laugh starts to sound further away as he takes another blow to the right side of his face, the crowbar connecting hard and steady against his ear. Then he can’t hear anything from that ear at all as blood starts to drip out. It’s the worst headache of Jason’s life. He can hear his skull cracking under the blows. He feels the blood seeping through his suit and onto the ground. There’s so much blood. He’s lightheaded and dizzy. It’s so hard to breathe.

SMACK

He’s not gonna make it.

And he finds himself, hoping against all odds, that someone will find him soon anyway. Maybe help will come just in time. Bruce is supposed to be the world’s greatest detective. Jason is his son. He’d figure it out. Maybe he already did and he’s actually close. Maybe he lied to Jason and he’s actually in Gotham and on his way. And maybe, you figured it out.

You're smart. You can fight off the Joker enough to get you both to safety. You were trained by Jason, Dick, Bruce. Jason believes you could do it. Maybe you're on your way. You're smart. You know Jason better than anyone. You’ll figure it out. You always figure it out. Maybe help is coming.

SMACK

Everything goes black for just a few seconds and then it’s blurry and shifted. He can’t see out of his right eye. Jason doesn’t know what’s going on as the Joker takes another smack. His laugh is just a reverberation now. The only sound he can even hear is the cracking of bones. Nothing else. And he doesn’t think he can breathe real well. He can’t move his jaw. He can’t even find the strength to try to move anymore. It all hurts and there’s so much blood.

Jason silently begs for the help he doesn’t realize will be too late just as the Joker takes a larger and harder blow to the front of his face.

He doesn’t think he’s gonna be able to hold on.

You drive to the abandoned carnival, coming up on one of the gates. Jason’s bike and helmet are right outside and the chain to the gate has been cut. You know. You know this isn’t good. It’s completely silent and you are terrified.

Silence can’t be good and a part of you hopes that maybe the Joker wants to play with Bruce. Maybe the Joker wants to kill Jason in front of him, to taunt him, that’ll give you some time to have a plan and get you both out of there, maybe. Or Bruce could make it in time to save you both.

But you creep around the grounds, cautiously but quickly. You're paying close attention to your head, making sure you don’t miss it if the throbbing you're certain will start. But, it doesn’t. Instead, you reach an open tunnel with carnival games and there’s someone lying on the ground.

It’s dark and despite you knowing damn well if it were the Joker on the ground, Jason would be over him bragging and cheering for himself, you hope it’s the Joker anyway. You hope against everything that the person laying on the ground is the Joker.

The closer you get though, the more you get the picture of the yellow and black cape.

Jason.

“No…” Your lip quivers as you pause. You're terrified to get any closer. It can’t be Jason. It can’t be. It can’t be. It can’t be. He’s strong and smart. He knows better. “No, no, no, no…” Your voice cracks as you start to walk closer and you can see him now.

There’s blood everywhere. He’s laying in a puddle of red and there’s blood splatter on the ground and the games. A bloody crowbar is tossed to the side and Jason is completely still. Your heart is in your throat as you close the distance, dropping to your knees.

“Jay…” Your voice is a whimpered whisper as you put your hand on his shoulder, pulling him to face you.

His body is completely limp and as he turns, you get the gruesome sight of what the Joker has done.

Jason’s face is mangled and unidentifiable. You can see his teeth through his jaw while there’s blood and bruising around the other side of his face. His face is swollen and paler than usual. There’s blood smeared across his face and on his lips. Some of his hair is wet with blood and sticking to his forehead. And his eyes are closed, not even trying to open.

Your heart shatters in that instant. The weight of the world has been on your shoulders for years and with the sight of his body, the world finally falls. It tumbles around you, breaking into unfixable pieces. The foundation keeping you steady is lifeless and cold and bloody.

Your lip quivers as tears start to trickle down your cheeks. Everything around you feels heavy and cold. The lump in your throat is so big and hard, you swear it’ll suffocate you finally and you’ll finally be out of this misery. The reaper creeps back from the shadow of your head, a smile similar to Joker’s shining back at you and he’s finally won. He won in a way you never thought he would.

Killing the last good parts of you, by killing him.

“Jason…” You whimper, one of your hands hesitantly going to his neck to check for a pulse. Nothing. There’s no pulse, just cold skin under the blood. “No…” You whine, tears now blurring your vision. You lean down, trying to hear him breathe and there’s nothing. He’s completely still. No breathing. Nothing. Just lifeless. “Jay, please, you can’t die.” You let out a sob, pulling Jason’s body into your lap. “I love you. You can’t die. I need you.” Your words are slurred as your nose runs and the cries grow louder.

You sob, rocking back and forth. You knew it would happen. You knew. And you should have known Jason was up to something when he didn’t go with you today. You should have known. He can’t be dead.

You swallow the lump in your throat, moving to rest Jason’s head flat on the ground while you pull out your phone, hands covered in blood. You call Bruce, putting the phone on speaker and then you start CPR. You swear it’ll be useless but you have to try anyway.

You swore every single day that you would never give up on him. And CPR isn’t going to help, but fuck it, you're not going to give up. So, you try anyway. You have to fucking try.

“Did you find him?” Bruce asks as soon as he answers.

Those words get you to let out another cry, your arms shaking as you push down on Jason’s chest. “Bruce!” You scream as your arms tremble.

Everything stops for Bruce. Pain shoots through his heart like a barbed wire arrow. He knows. He knows that cry because he’s let it out himself all those years ago. He’s heard other people. Babs. Dick. He knows and yet, it can’t be true. Not his son.

“What happened?” Bruce shakes his head, using all of his willpower not to let his voice shake.

“What do I do?” You cry, your cries are loud but there’s a weakness in your voice. “He’s not breathing and the Joker beat him with a fucking crowbar! Bruce, what do I do?” You beg Bruce to help. Your voice is slurred and panicked, pleading with all of the energy in you. He’s fucking Batman, he has to help. “What do I do? He’s not breathing. There’s so much blood, Bruce, help, please. You have to save him. Help me save him, please. Bruce, I can’t lose him, I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t.” You keep pumping on Jason’s chest but you swear it’s not working and not just because the Robin suit is so sturdy you're barely getting a compression in. You beg him and beg him, as if your pleas are enough to bring Jason back.

“I’ll send someone, keep doing CPR.” Bruce instructs with a square jaw.

“Bruce, I don’t…..I don’t think it’s helping.” You wail and you can’t breathe. It’s so hard to breathe. “I don’t think…..Bruce….” You let out a cough as your elbows shake and you're losing rhythm of the chest compressions.

“Keep going, don’t stop until they get there. I’m landing soon.” Bruce instructs and he never should have gone. He should have seen it. How the hell did he miss this?

“There’s so much blood…Bruce.”

Barbara Gordon and a few trusted people close to Bruce show up first. They find you still trying to perform CPR. You're slower now, and you're not getting the impact you need to make a difference. Your arms are weak and you're nearly hyperventilating and choking on your own tears.

The paramedics try their best to get you off of him but you scream and yell and cry for them to get off of you. You shove them off of you and you try and try and try. Bruce is still on the phone, telling you to let them do their job but you can’t. You can’t do it. You can’t because then you give up. You can’t give up on him. Not him.

“Hey.” Barabra wheels over a few feet away from you and she gets a look at the damage as her stomach turns and she knows he’s gone. “You need to stop.” Her voice is calm as she tries to keep it together.

“No!” You scream and you feel too weak to deal with any of it. He was your everything. “I can’t.”

The paramedics look at Babraba waiting to be told what to do and they know, too. His face is completely destroyed. He’s unrecognizable. The only reason Barabra even knows it’s Jason is because of the Robin suit. There’s brain matter on the ground. There’s more blood on the ground than there is in his body.

“Bluejay.” Barbara calls again, her voice cracking and this gets you to look at her. Even in the dark, Babara can see the redness of your eyes and the tears shining on the top half of your cheek above your mask. “He’s gone.” Babraba’s eyes go misty and you shake your head.

“No…” You whine and you finally stop but your hands stay on his chest. “No, not…no.” You let out a sob and you can’t even see Barbara anymore, the tears have blurred everything together. “I can’t.” You fall back, one of the paramedics catching you so you don’t hit the pavement too hard. The other paramedic jumps in and to Jason, just to be completely positive.

You shove the paramedic off of you and walk the few feet weakly to Barbara. “I-I…what--” You suck in a harsh breath, your breathing so rapid you feel like you're going to pass out.

“Sit down.” Barbara tries to keep her composure and you collapse with a loud sob, your entire chest feeling like it’s been set on fire with gasoline.

It can’t be him. Why him? He was good. He was a good person and funny and smart and kind. Jason had a heart of gold. Why did it have to be him? It never should have been him. He always deserved so much better. He never deserved this. This isn’t fair. It’s not right and it’s so fucking painful you wish the ground would just open up and swallow you whole.

“Babs!” You scream. “I-I-I don’t I don’t wanna do it anymore.” Your teeth grit together as your words are wet and slurred.

You can’t breathe. You can’t breathe. It’s hard to breathe and your chest feels like it’s all caving in under the pressure. Maybe putting your heart in a pressure cooker would be less painful than this. Everything fucking hurts.

Barbara rests a hand on your shoulder and she knew Jason was reckless but she didn’t think he’d ever actually get himself killed. He was smart. Smarter than this. You cover your face with your hands, not caring you're covered in Jason’s blood. You just want everything to stop. The pain and the world and time and everything. You want it all to be over.

“I’m so sorry.” Barbara offers and there is nothing she can say that’s going to make this better.

“I can’t.” You spit and push Barabra’s hand off you before getting to your feet.

You push through the pain, running away. Barbara yells after you but you do not care. You make yourself run through the pain and the weakness. If you can do anything, it’s run from it. You want to run as far as your legs will let you. To the bike where you can speed away from it all. Speed so fast the pain goes away. The agony will fade if you run. You can do it. You tell yourself you can as tears fall down your face. You toss the helmet on and hop on the bike, and leave. You've always been good at running. You can run from it.

You're in the bathroom back at the manor, scrubbing the blood off of your hands through tears. Everything is blurry and painful. It’s burning and agonizing and stabbing. It aches and throbs. Breathing is the hardest thing you've ever done. You try to get in a full breath but every time you do, a sob immediately follows and it’s like the wind is knocked out from your lungs all over again. Your head is spinning with a throbbing headache and your eyes are so puffy you can barely open them. But, there’s blood staining your hands, Jason’s blood, and you have to get it off. You have to get it off.

Get it off. Get it off. Get it off.

You grit your teeth so hard that your jaw starts to pulse and you hate it. You hate this so much. You hate it and you want him back. You need him. He is everything to you. He is your everything. He is your best friend and you love him more than you've ever loved anyone. And he’s supposed to take care of you and you're supposed to take care of him. And it’s not fair and it’s senseless and it was brutal and you scream at the top of your lungs before falling to the floor. You lean against the counter, pulling your legs to your chest as you put your hands on your face because you can’t do this anymore

You talked about what life you could have together. And you swear you saw it. For the first time, you were optimistic about a future. Because you had him. He gave you all of this hope for the future because Jason could survive anything. He was supposed to survive anything. He was good at it. Dodging whatever fucked up shit the world was going to throw at him. And now he’s not. He didn’t dodge fast enough. And you were supposed to have an apartment one day together. And make dinner together. And have a dog and a cat because Jason always really liked cats. He’d come home and you’d clean up the blood and he’d do the same for you when patrol got a little messy. You were supposed to have a life together.

You don’t know how you're supposed to get up again after this.

And then Molly walks in.

She’s been crying since Bruce called her and asked her to check on you. He’s worried about what you might do and seeing you on the floor absolutely hysterical, she knows why. Of course, she knew it would be bad. Her best friend just lost the person she loves. Of course, you're going to be a mess but….you're covered in blood and Bruce didn’t tell her what happened. And on top of that, you still have the suit on, minus the mask, which is another surprise Molly did not expect to get today.

Molly says your name with hesitance as she walks in, sitting on the floor in front of you.

You look up, moving your hands. “M-Molly.” You whine, your bottom lip trembling, the hood of your suit barely lets Molly get a glimpse of your face that’s covered in blood as well.

Molly nods. “Bruce called.” Her voice is just above a whisper.

“He….Molly…h-h-he…d-di-died..” You let out a sob as you shake your head and you just want it to be done. You're so fucking tired.

“I know.” Molly lets out a soft cry, sniffling softly.

“H-he’s dead.” Your entire body jerks with another cry as you hang your head. You're so fucking tired. Tired of all of it.

“I know.” Molly closes the distance between you, pulling you into a hug and allowing you to completely break against her. And then Molly starts crying because Jason was her best friend, too. “I’m so sorry.” Molly manages to get out.

“I can’t do it.” Your voice is weak against her.

“Can’t what?” Molly pulls away, her hands still on your shoulders as if trying to stabilize you.

Any of it. You can’t do any of it. You're covered in his blood and it all hurts. You're weak and tired and exhausted. It’s all agonizing and paralyzing and numb. It’s all too much. And you just cannot do any of it anymore.

“Blood and…” Your breathing is labored, your head swaying slightly. And you're so lightheaded and nauseous. “Do this.”

“One thing at a time.” Molly stands up and grabs a wash rag, wetting it with soap and water. Molly can break later. You need help. “Let me see.” You hand your hand to Molly and Molly starts cleaning.

Molly expects to find some sort of wound but she finds nothing. The more she scrubs, the more blood comes off and it’s just your skin under it. And she shakes her head because what the fuck happened to Jason that got you covered in his blood? A part of her almost doesn’t want to know. But, she has to ask anyway. Bruce was a little vague. So, after a few minutes, with your cries becoming quieter, Molly decides to ask.

“C-can I ask you what happened?” Molly is seeing that you're actually one of the suited vigilantes that roam Gotham so she’s guessing something with a bad guy went a little south.

And you don’t care anymore. None of it matters anymore. Jason is dead. It’s not his secret anymore. You're in your suit anyway and Bruce isn’t home. You're all alone anyway.

“Joker beat him to death with a crowbar.” You answer plainly Molly feels her stomach turn.

“What?” Molly’s heart stops in her chest.

You nod as you sniffle, watching Molly clean the remainder of Jason’s blood from your hands. “He was Robin.” Your voice is hoarse as you talk.

Molly pauses, blinking at you and she’s so confused. And this whole thing is growing more and more unsettling. Maybe she shouldn’t have asked.

“He…Jason was Robin?”

You nod again, sniffling. “Yeah.”

“You found him?” Molly asks. Why did you have to find him? Of all people, it just had to be you. Of course, it was you.

“Yeah.” More tears start to fall from your eyes and you can see him every time you blink. That’s going to be your last memory of him and it hurts so fucking bad you want to leave.

“I’m…I’m sorry. Is this all his?” Molly’s voice grows a little panicked. She can’t even imagine the sight you walked in on.

“There was a lot of blood. The head bleeds a lot.” You clear your throat before you sniffle again.

Molly is terrified you're going to start giving her gory details. Not on purpose but because you're too tired to care. The crying is slowing down and that always means you will talk. You stop caring and then you talk. Molly doesn’t want to know and you don’t need to relive the horror verbally.

“Okay, um…okay you stay here. I’m gonna get you some clothes.” Molly stands up quickly.

“C-can you…Jsaon’s room, there’s a…maroon hoodie. It was his favorite.” You look up at her as Molly heads to the doorway.

“Yeah, I’ll be back.” Molly nods quickly.

You let out another cry and you don’t think you’ll be able to survive this one. It’s too heavy. It’s too much. There’s only so much one person can take. And you swear as you shiver on the bathroom door with broken sobs tearing up your throat that Jason Todd was your breaking point. Jason Todd is dead and you swear you’ll never recover.

prev. chapter | next chapter

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

A/n: So, this is what Jason looks like in his death scene and he looks scared. Which, is probably a plothole because Titans (or them trying to throw us off since it's episode 1 ?? idk) but I decided I was just gonna use that anyway for fun lol Also fun fact, I was originally not going to include his death scene since we saw it in the show but then I rewatched UTRH and was encouraged by my best friend to make it worse so I did. And I'm really glad I included it lol I'm sorry but I really like how it turned out lol

Tag list: @fairyofshampoo // @italiana-20 // @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss // @ghostkingblake // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @lilylovelyxo // @cryinghotmess // @yesimwriting // @vivian-555 // @stainedstardom // @baebeepeach // @legend-o-zelda // @harleycao // @somehow-lovable-trash // @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx // @deyja-the-duck // @jasontoddslover // @captainmarvels-blog // @totallynotkaibiased // @scarlovesyou // @whydoyoucare866 // @littlemeowmeow1000

#jason todd fanfic #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd x reader #red hood fanfic #red hood fanfiction #red hood x reader #titans fanfic #titans fanfiction #dc fanfic #dc fanfiction #petrichor

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ngkiscool · 2 years

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More vibes - this time, it’s hurt and comfort. Please take extra care when reading the tags and the trigger warnings!

As always, all the fics are focusing on supporting characters, rated G or T and are SFW. The description includes rating, word count, main characters and main CW.

In the next weeks the focus will be about stories post-canon, please send recs for stories that focus on supporting characters (as in, Aziraphale and Crowley are not the main ones). Self recs are encouraged!

Sister Snake, Nanny Serpent by @ineffableghost - 1.7K, G, focusing on Warlock, Nanny Ashtoreth and Brother Francis. Summary: If a toy snake was all Warlock had to remember them by - those who, if not called his parents, were still the ones who were there for him, who listened when he wanted to share something, who held him when he wanted comfort, who patched him up when he was sick or hurt - at least, he thought, it was something with a little of both of them in it.

Saturday Mourning by nephiliminality - 915 words, G, focusing on Lesly the International Express Man and Maud. cw - Temporary character death. Summary: A few hours after Lesley goes out on a few local jobs, Maud gets a knock at the door.

Fever by Lady_of_the_Spirit - 842 words, G, focusing on Adam Young and the four horsepeople. cw - Sickfic Summary: Antichrists, it turns out, can still get sick. Whether this is just a side-effect of Adam’s powers, the influence of Adam’s belief that he should get sick every once in a while like every other child, or just one of those things that regular human children go through, none of the Horsepeople know for certain. All they know is that they have a nine-year-old home for the week, sick with a fever.

Reason to Believe by killerweasel - 778 words, G, focusing on Sandalphon and Asmodeus Summary: How Sandalphon and Asmodeus met.

Blackbird In The Dead Of Night by corgifeathers - 2.7K, G, focusing on Beelzebub and Hastur. Summary: Hastur struggles in the Post Non-Apocalypse era. Beelzebub attempts to comfort him.

Tearing Wings Off A Fly by Stranded_In_The_Cosmos - 1.3K, T, focusing on Beelzebub, Gabriel, Ligur and Hastur. cw - blood, injury. Summary: Beelzebub is called into Lucifer's office about their wings, just what are they hiding, and why do they lie about them? They must fight to prove Satan wring about them having a weakness, but unfortunately, Ligur has other plans when he sees them.

pickle and nutella sandwiches on rye by RainingPrince - 1.3K, T, focusing on Harriet Dowling, Harriet’s sister and Thaddeus J. Dowling. cw - Pregnancy, food, (brief!) mention of a dead animal (related to Schroedinger's cat paradox), brief body/size thoughts and mentioned diet culture, brief mention of a dead parent (past). Summary: She honestly wasn’t sure which option was worse.

Foreign Country by @unproblematicme - 730 words, T, focusing on Anathema Device and Newt Pulsifer. Summary: Anathema struggles with her new life without prophecies.

You Know You'll Never Leave Me by SeedsOfWinter - 2.4K, T, focusing on Young Shadwell and Madame Tracy. cw - consent, alcohol consumption, historically accurate implied homophobia. Summary: With Tracy offering comfort and understanding, the re-heartbroken Corporal Shadwell tells her the truth about his ex.

Abel by Sir_Bedevere - 1.5K, T, focusing on Adam from Eden, Eve, Cain, Abel, Crowley and Aziraphale. cw - blood and violence. Summary: A demon watches over the death of the second child, afraid that he will be punished for his mercy.An angel watches over the death of the second child, afraid of his guilt.

Bonus - master list with all past recommendations!

Thanks for reading, and remember - sharing is caring!

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kiddbegins · 8 months

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AO3 | Wattpad

wanna be tagged in any of these? sign up to their tag list here

One chicago

Chicago Med:

Will Halstead open

Connor Rhodes closed

Chicago PD: closed

Kevin Atwater

Jay Halstead

Hailey Upton

Chicago Fire:

Leslie Shay open

Matt Casey open

Brian Zvonecek open for bff only aka @winchesterszvonecek

House M.D

Robert Chase open

James Wilson open (currently fixated)

Prompt List - a list of prompts that I've come across that you can request with anybody on this list :)

RULES: I’m pretty open to writing anything. For the most part. I do have qualms about writing pregnancy/birth and weddings? For one shots and such. Fics are different. I don’t even have a real reason but, yeah. And if you send an ask that could be considered 18+ please add if you want smut in it or not. Those are my own asks of you. Thank you and enjoy my brain worms on all of these characters.

NOTE: if it's a request, it will go into my queue and be posted weekly on Mondays. If it isn't a request: i.e. an idea I have of my own I'll post them as I feel. Which could be random or scheduled.

Check here to make sure a similar request hasn't already been sent in!

I also won’t write halstead siblings. I think way too many horrible horrible thoughts about the boys (will) for me to feel comfortable writing a sibling of them.

thank you @cafekitsune and @saradika for the banners and dividers I'll be using here and on other posts

#chicago fire #Chicago med #chicago pd #one Chicago #will halstead #jay halstead #connor Rhodes #kevin Atwater #hailey upton #leslie Shay #stella Kidd #one Chicago fanfiction #fic prompt #prompt list #chicago fire fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic

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wannab-urs · 4 months

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Pedro Pascal Character Fanfiction Recs | Vol 32

AO3 | Kofi | Main Masterlist | The Spreadsheet Masterlist

Howdy folks!

Welcome to The Spreadsheet Digest, my weekly(ish) fic rec list. I read a really long fic this week, so almost everything else I read was a one shot that I kinda crammed in between chapters of the long fic. We have a pretty good variety of pedro boys this week! I'm actually running low on one shots on my TBR, it's full of series. So rec me some one shots!

All info provided by the author unless it was blank, in which case I filled it in.

Fic Recs Below!

Somewhere Beautiful

Din series by @peetiespetals

Summary: You have been working as a slave since the demise of your people and destruction of your planet. A stranger passes through your life and you make a bid for freedom, thwarted by the very man who inspired you to reach for it. In a twist of fate, the two of you are thrown together and must learn how to live with each other as the lines between slave and master begin to blur. Can you really tell the difference between duty and devtion?

Tags: smut, fluff and smut, angst, rough sex, bdsm, abandonment, neglect, physical abuse, love stories, shower sex, mutual masturbation, dom/sub undertones, oral sex, shameless smut, praise kink, bondage, biting, slow burn, spanking, orgasm control, orgasm delay/denial, cock warming, master/slave, vaginal fingering, deep throating, breast worship, pussy spanking, ball play, public creampie, edging, anal sex, foot jobs, handcuffs, cock bondage, panties in mouth, aftercare, jealous din djarin, hurt/comfort, overstimulation, strong female characters, hurt no comfort, porn with plot, sexual tension, porn with feelings, canon typical violence, slow romance, fluff and angst, anxiety, manhandling, pov second person, vaginal sex, nipple play, dirty talk, hair pulling

Thots: this fic had me in a chokehold all fucking week and then when I finished it I immediately started part two. Obsessed.

Take What You Need

Frankie one shot by @yespolkadotkitty

Summary: Frankie needs to calm down before flying you "over the fucking Andes, man," so you help him out

Tags: SMUT. Porn with a flimsy nod to plot.

Thots: Redfly is such a dick. but anyway, I love this concept. reader providing some much needed stress relief? yes please. And it was HOT. I love this so much

I cannot get you close enough

Max Phillips one shot by @leslie-lyman

Summary: “You have to invite me in, sweetheart.” Oh. Right. Vampire. “Come in, please,” you say demurely, and Max’s smile widens as he steps over the threshold into your apartment. He reaches for you again immediately, kicking your door closed and pulling you close. “Good girl,” he murmurs. “Such a polite little Omega.”

Tags: A/B/O dynamics; one small scene of men being creepy and threatening towards reader (but, perhaps surprisingly, one of those men is not Max); extremely self-indulgent Halloween costumes on the part of your author; a bit of angst; fEeLiNgS; absolutely way too much plot and character backstory for what was supposed to just be porn; Alpha!Max is his own warning; heat sex; biting; blood-drinking; breeding kink; many, many creampies; Max has an absolutely filthy mouth; look, it’s heat sex with Max, it probably (hopefully?) entails exactly what you think it does

Thots: I think this my favorite pedro fandom abo ever. it’s so fucking good. i love how max takes care of her like a good alpha, but it's not completely mired in shitty omega stereotypes. She still has a whole career and a life and hobbies and shit. Plus the smut is top fucking tier good god.

Chaste

Dieter one shot by @covetyou

Summary: Off the back of a two week retreat to the middle of fuck knows where Dieter Bravo doesn't seem quite himself. You soon figure out why.

Tags: chastity pollen (the opposite of sex pollen - our man can't fuck), mention of past drug use, masturbation, not phone sex but phone sex adjacent, brief mention of Dieter pissing (twice), cock and ball pain (not cock and ball torture), a brief thing with a glove that isn't sexy at all for anyone involved but it's there, the vaguest of dub-con for the ending (Dee sends you pictures of his dick that you didn't ask for/technically said no to but jerk off to anyway)

Thots: This had me dying. It was funny as fuck. Poor Dee... but then the end... that shit was hot in like a totally pathetic way... This came off that list of reverse fandom tropes, and now I want to see more of them.

illicit affairs

Joel one shot by @chaotic-mystery

Summary: it’s my take on what illicit affairs means. Every time I listened to it I imagined Joel, specifically dbf Joel. I hope the swifties go *easy* on me and pls don’t say anything if you didn’t like it.

Tags: angst. And more angst. Swearing, forbidden relationship, arguing, fwb, alluded age gap but not specified. Use of nicknames (kid, baby……don’t look at me ok I didn’t do IT), reader is not physically described, no use of y/n.

Thots: Mads broke my heart with this one. Joel is such a dick, expecting reader to just put up with the shitty treatment because why? because she's young? Fuck him and good for reader. I kinda wanna see Joel's internal struggle for the next few weeks after this scene.

Was it all a dream?

Din series by @beskarandblasters

Summary: You’ve always had vivid dreams, an escape from your monotonous life. But one night, something appears in your dreams that keeps reoccurring; a pair of brown eyes. Or Two people, in completely different parts of the galaxy, find each other in their dreams and try to make sense of the strange connection they share.

Tags: canon divergent (long live the Razor Crest), switches between Reader and Din’s POV, story takes place in the dream realm and the real world, set somewhere between the Book of Boba Fett/very beginning of season three, eventual smut (starts at chapter 4!), line between reality and dreams gets blurred, use of Mando’a words and phrases, no use of y/n

Thots: I could not be more excited for this series. It's a brilliant idea and it's so fucking cool. I love reader and Din's relationship. I love the parallels between them. I'm so ready to hype this fic up for the next several weeks AGH.

Trigger Points

Ezra one shot by @whataperfectwasteoftime

Summary: Ezra is a massage therapist. What kind, you ask? Internal massage. That’s it that’s the fic.

Tags: Medical kink, massage kink (is that a thing?), erotic massage, mentions of sexual dysfunction and difficulty orgasming, consent forms, the clinical is erotic now, power imbalance due to the masseur/patient dynamic, mentions of uhhh *checks notes* anal massage, lots of vaginal fingering I mean massaging, pelvic floor massaging but make it erotic, dubcon only in the sense that Ezra says orgasm is not the goal and then definitely deliberately gives her one anyway, g-spot orgasms, squirting, Penny gets on her soapbox at the end

Thots: i think i might have a masseuse kink... anyways... there's something about the overly clinical language that made this so hot. like the lack of trying to make it sexy somehow made it sexier. i'm short circuiting

forever is the sweetest con

Joel series by sistersadeyes (AO3)

Summary: your life, post-apocalypse, and the surly old survivor who darkens your door. Growing up with a doomsday prepper as a father hadn't been easy. But after the Outbreak, you can't help but feel a little grateful to the old man. You're almost sad he didn't make it long enough to see how right he'd been. You inherit the farm, the stockpile, and the bunker months before the Outbreak. And in the aftermath, you use it to prove that human kindness still exists, helping all those you can. Set 5 years after the Outbreak.

Tags: no use of y/n, fluff, domestic fluff, romance, eventual romance, post outbreak, eventual smut, texas, homesteading, doomsday prepper, age difference (14ish years), fluff and angst, canon typical violence, canon divergent/not canon compliant, smut, pining, mutual masturbation, mutual pining, vague timeline, time jumps, forehead kisses, fingerfucking, oral sex, penis in vagina sex, praise kink, sir kink, breeding kink if you squint, emotional hurt/comfort, protective joel, angst, vaginal fingering, daddy kink, possessive joel, somnophilia, consensual somnophilia, cowgirl position, creampie

Thots: This fic made me cry tears of pure joy at the end. It's so sweet and precious and full of domestic fluff. But there's also some fucking heartwrenching angst. And really fucking cool action too??? It's a total rewrite of canon and I thought it was super fucking creative and so fun to read. The smut is also... good fucking god is it hot. Joel is perfect in this fic.

go slow

Joel one shot by @frannyzooey

Summary: In the quiet of your bedroom, Joel guides you through it.

Tags: riding, joel talks you through it, p in v sex

Thots: Hot, sensual, perfect, amazing smut.

Honor and Obey

Frankie/Santi/Reader one shot by @magpiepills

Summary: You are Santi’s wife and when Frankie moves in, you have an idea that Santi helps you make a reality.

Tags: SMUT! Threesome, sort of fucking, oral m and f receiving, m/m dynamics, sort of dom reader, sort of sub Frankie and Santi, Frankie is the Pussy Eating King, big dicks, teasing, flirting, mentions of alcohol, mentions of curls, fuck licking, cum shots, creampies, a little overstimulation, one spank, pwp, just porn.Y'all know I love my subby boys... and I really love a MMF threesome.

Thots: This fic had me sweating. Frankie and Santi are so gorgeous together. Pussy Eating King Frankie is always a welcome addition to any Frankie fic, also. Just fucking magnificent, truly.

Blessing in Disguise

Lucien Flores one shot by @pedgito

Summary: you're his best-friend's daughter and he's at a party he can't be bothered to care about, luckily you're the one thing that catches his attention.

Tags: no use of y/n, age gap (not specified, but it's girthy) smoking, semi-public sex, daddy kink, f!oral, unprotected piv, light choking, mentions of reader having hair that can be grabbed (to some degree), lucien is a major dilf and divorced

Thots: I am astronomically down bad for lucien flores. It's giving latino dbf!joel. Every single second of this fic is hot. I need a cold shower. and a nap. and maybe a cigarette. Maybe Luce will share one with me. I hope he smokes spirits.

My Recent Fics

Ravage - smut | AO3 - Ezra x f!reader

Type: one shot Word Count: 1.6k Summary: “Oh birdie… I could just eat you.” OR Saltburn-style hate as consumption Tags: Weird vibes, period/menstruation smut, bloodplay and blood consumption, weird classism stuff, biting, fingering, oral f!receiving, Saltburn AU

Only Good Girls - smut | AO3 - Dave x f!reader

Type: one shot Word Count: 1.3k Summary: Dave reminds you why you should always be a good girl for him. Tags: PWP/plot what plot, Reader has hair that can be pulled; fingering f receiving; squirting; multiple orgasms; overstimulation; choking; rough sex as punishment; unprotected p in v; mirror sex; bondage (necktie around the wrists behind the back); toaster strudel not a twinkie; excessive hair pulling; spanking

Happy Reading!

#fic recs #the spreadsheet digest #fanfiction recommendations #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fanfiction #ppcu fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction

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irishavengersassemble · 1 year

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Game of Survival: Part 1

After tragedy strikes Rafael Barba’s little sister moves back to New York City for a fresh start. Will she be able to move on with the help of her loving big brother and perhaps find happiness with a certain lieutenant in SVU.

Hey lovlies. I know its been forever, but I had this idea for a series and I just had to write it.

Series takes place at the beginning of season 18 of Law and Order: SVU and has references to One Chicago. Reader is canonicallly bisexual and in her mid-thirties.

Pairings: Olivia Benson x Barba Reader Sonny Carisi x Rafael Barba

Header belongs to me.

You let out a small sigh as you took in the familiar office that you’d not stepped foot in for over a year. Taking in the cozy office of your older brother you settled on the comfy brown couch knowing it would probably be a while before he came back from court.

He was always busy that didn’t mean that he didn’t have time for you, given you lived hours away and you both worked insane hours.

You usually didn’t hear from each other apart from a weekly phone call whenever you both had time which didn’t seem often these days.

Glancing down at your phone your e/c eyes landed on the different apartment listings that you’d been scanning through.

Nothing had caught your eye in all honesty this had been a spare whim of the moment decision one that you’d not regret.

You’d needed a change. A change had been needed for a while and you’d finally decided it was time, time to head home and start over and get a fresh start so to speak.

Severide and Casey had helped you pack up your things over the weekend and you’d made the long drive from Chicago back to New York with nothing but your car and a small U-Haul.

A deep huff fell from your lips as you found the couch growing more comfortable by the minute the long drive catching up with you.

The next thing you knew you were being startled awake as Rafael’s surprised voice filled your ears stirring you from the dreamless slumber you’d fallen into.

“Y/N? Y/N Wake up. What the hell are you doing here?” Your older brother retorts his voice holding so many questions ever the lawyer.

You groaned opening your eyes finding your big brother of nine years sitting beside you on the couch. He was dressed in one of his well-tailored suits his light brown hair combed back in a neat style.

“Hi, Rafa. Sorry, I fell asleep. It was a long drive. Ummm. I’m back in New York permanently this time. I moved out of Kelly’s place this weekend and drove the twelve and a half hours straight through.” You said knowing your brother was processing what you’d told him his mind was always a step ahead of the conversation.

He knew that the past few years had been hard for you and that ever since the incident you’d been trying to pick up the shattered pieces of your life.

What was left of it. How you’d been able to keep going at all had been a surprise to you.

It was evident the only reason you’d made it this far was the love and support of your family and friends. Those closest to you the people you considered family had helped you through the roughest time of your life they’d helped you pick up the pieces and try to throw your life back together.

Rafael sat there for a moment glancing over at you with a concerned brotherly brow.

He knew it had been hard for you after you’d lost Leslie, you’d been a broken shell of the woman you once were.

The woman who had a ferocity and a fire in you a fierceness that hadn’t dimmed even with the rough life you’d come from had disappeared.

You were softer now than you’d once been quiet and calm, gentle, they’d always been attributes you’d carried yet they seemed to control you these days.

Rafael had been surprised when you’d told him of your plans to go from paramedic to police officer after losing your fiancé several years prior.

He’d worried his mami and abuelita had worried, yet you’d managed to pass through the academy with flying colors and soon became a damn good cop with an even better reputation.

“Well, this is entirely unexpected but it's great to see you Hermana.” Rafael purred pulling you into a tight hug pressing a kiss to your head as you clung to him finding comfort in his embrace.

“I take it you don’t have an apartment or anything settled out yet which is fine. You can stay with me until you find a place.”

“But what about Son-“ You started not at all wanting to impose on your brother and his boyfriend who was over at Rafael’s so much you were surprised that your brother hadn’t asked him to move in yet.

That wasn’t any of your business and you really weren’t the best person to come to when it came to relationships or relationship advice.

Your big brother’s voice filled your ears startling you from your thoughts that had been getting away from you over the past few weeks.

That’s another reason you’d decided to move the city was too different, too quiet, and no matter where you look Leslie was everywhere.

A change had been necessary, you’d wanted to heal actually heal, and being with your family had seemed like the best way to go about that.

“Oh don’t worry about Sonny. You know he loves you. You’ve gotten along. You staying with me won’t be an issue.

I’m sure you’d much rather stay with me than mami anyways.” He chuckled knowing your mother would have his head if she heard his comment.

“Alright, Rafa I’ll stay with you if you insist.” You sighed pulling out of your big brother’s hold rolling your eyes at him.

Rafael could be many things a sassy pain in the ass for starters, but he’d been the best big brother ever since Lucia had taken you in and adopted you when you were eight years old.

Even though Rafael was nine years older he’d always made time for you and though you were close with your mother you and Rafael had been thick as thieves for as long as you could remember.

“I do insist just like I insist on taking you to lunch. Come on. When’s the last time you’ve had a decent meal?” Your big brother quipped raising the infamous Barba brow in your direction.

A sigh fell off your lips Rafael knew you better than anyone having a little sister who was a first responder and working the crazy hours you did you’d often forgotten to eat.

“Last night…” The words tumbled out of your mouth as Rafael’s face hardened giving you a knowing expression forcing a deep huff from your lips as you continue.

“Okay technically it was the night before Herman and the rest of the gang threw me a going away party at Molly’s.” The words tumbled out of your mouth as you stood standing to your feet as Rafael walked you out.

The light brown-haired man rolled his eyes knowing an order of your favorite Chinese food was calling your name.

“Come on let's get some food into you before you blow away or pass out on me.” Rafael sighed throwing an arm around your shoulders as he led you toward the elevators.

“Rafa I’m fine. You act as though I don’t eat. Trust me when I can I do. You know this. I have the Barba genes maybe not literally but metaphorically.

With Abuelita and Mami’s cooking, it was only a matter of time before I become a foodie just like yours truly.” The words tumbled from your mouth as you gave the man a once over followed by your first real smile ever since you’d stepped foot back into your hometown.

“I’m not a foodie.” Your brother sassed knowing that he actually was a foodie and when he’d started dating Sonny that had only intensified. It didn’t help the chatty Italian man was an exceptional cook and one of his main love languages was acts of service.

You were grateful that Rafael had found someone like Sonny, he was warm and loving and made sure that Rafael was taken care of and you appreciated it more than he’d ever know.

It had been hard being away from your family for so many years, but when the opportunity presented itself to move to Chicago alongside joining Firehouse 51 you’d been unable to say no.

Back then you’d been a fresh-faced twenty-four-year-old who was ready to pursue your dream of being a paramedic and saving lives.

Now after a decade in Chicago you were back in New York for a fresh start you knew this would be good for you and that’s what Leslie would have wanted for you as well.

She’d have wanted you to be happy and continue your life not wallowing in the grief that had been all-consuming for the past two years.

You owed it to yourself and you owed it to her to find happiness again. That’s what she’d wanted for you to enjoy living again even with her gone.

It was the only way you knew to keep her memory alive. You needed to start living again and maybe in time you would.

Going out for dinner with your big brother was a good start you felt much calmer as you leant into Rafael’s side glad that you had such a strong support system behind you.

#law and order svu #one chigago #law and order x reader #olivia benson x reader #rafael barba x reader #leslie shay #barisi #matt casey #kelly severide #christopher herrmann #chicago fire x reader #sonny carisi

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scotianostra · 2 months

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The Scottish actor Hamish Wilson passed away on March 26th 2020.

Probably most famous for replacing Frazer Hines for two episodes of Dr Who in the 60’s. Wilson was another one who started early, aged just 14 he started studying at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama.

He was born James Aitken Wilson in Glasgow, in 1942. His family moved to Cambuslang when he was very young. His father, also James, was a sales rep for a paint firm; his mother Isobel (née Willock) worked in the rag trade. After they divorced Isobel married another Wilson, Robert, and Hamish and his sister Jan grew up with step-siblings Leslie, Sheila and Robbie.

He discovered his love of drama while at West Coats Primary School. Later, at the Glasgow Academy, this love drove him to do “that stupidly romantic thing of running away from school to appear on the stage”. He was soon working professionally – he understudied Jimmy Logan for a summer season at the King’s Theatre and appeared in Peter Duguid’s 1957 Glasgow Citizen’s Theatre production of Enemy of the People.

He then attended the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama and gained more professional experience during the summer holidays. He played the title role in 1959’s live ITV play, The Boy from the Gorbals, did a 1960 episode of Para Handy with Duncan Macrae, and met Walt Disney while he was working on his film adaptation of Greyfriars Bobby.

“I was trying to chat up a pretty blonde extra, with no success at all”, he once recalled, “and this gentleman with blond hair and a little moustache came over and started chatting to me. We nattered away for five minutes and then he wandered away. The girl was terribly impressed, but I spoilt it because I didn’t recognise him. I said, ‘Who was that?’ and she stopped being impressed. ‘That was Walt Disney!’, she said”.

He graduated from the RSAMD in 1963, winning the award for Most Promising Male Performance, and appeared on stage at Coventry’s Belgrade Theatre , Perth Theatre and Dundee Repertory Theatre (1970-71), where his performance in Mark But This Flea was described as “remarkable” by The Stage, the trade weekly – not least because he had stepped in 24 hours before opening night after the original actor had broken his leg.

On television he appeared in The Wednesday Play, The Vital Spark , This Man Craig (three different roles, 1966), Softly, Softly and The Revenue Men (three different roles.

In 1968 Doctor Who regular Frazer Hines, who played Patrick Troughton’s Jacobite companion Jamie, fell ill with chickenpox while making the adventure The Mind Robber. After an ingenious, hasty rewrite Jamie underwent a temporary metamorphosis and with one day’s rehearsal Wilson took over, cramming his lines overnight and recording the first of his two episodes the next day.

Further TV roles followed, including The Borderers Boy Meets Girls (1969), Adam Smith, and The View from Daniel Pike but he found that he needed to turn his attention away from acting because “ a beautiful girl smiled at me”. Intent on marriage and starting a family, he gained more secure employment as an announcer for STV.

In 1975 he went to Radio Forth as its arts and drama producer. With limited resources but boundless ambition, he broadcast original writing, late-night horror classics, and a six-month long serial about Mary Queen of Scots, told in 130 twelve-minute episodes, broadcast daily. Drama of this kind on commercial radio was largely unheard of.

In 1979 he did an adaptation of The Slab Boys for Radio Clyde, ultimately joining the station and founding Independent Local Radio’s first drama department there.

His many productions at Clyde included The Bell in the Tree a series of dramas about the history of Glasgow by Edward H Chisnall; Donald Campbell’s Till the Seas Run Dry, with Tom Fleming as Robert Burns and Mary Riggans as Jean Armour), and Nick McCarthy’s Elephant Dances with Katy Murphy).

He also encouraged new talent, instigating initiatives which gave professional breaks to aspiring comedy writers and awarded contracts and prized Equity cards to final-year drama students.

He left Clyde in 1989 and joined the BBC, where he produced a huge number of plays and series for Radio Scotland, Radio 3 and Radio 4. He really believed in radio: “It allows you to creep inside somebody’s head”, he said, “and paint pictures that are going to stay long after the programme is finished.”

In all, he won 23 awards for his radio productions – his ‘Oscars’, as he jokingly referred to them – and served a juror in the Prix Italia (where he was also the first ILR producer to be jury chairman), Prix Futura Berlin and the Prix Europa.

When he left the BBC after ten successful years he went back to the old trade, doing voiceover work and acting in episodes of Taggart,, Monarch of the Glen and Still Game .

On March 21st 2020 Tony contracted coronavirus and sadly passed away only 6 days later on March 26th aged 77. He worked for many years for the actors union Equity, the Scottish Secretary of the union said of him:

“He led a full life and touched many people. He was one of life’s enthusiasts and succeeded at most everything he turned his hand to. Time in his company was always enjoyable and often informative. Remember that mischievous grin and raise a glass to him. RIP.”

The beautiful girl who smiled at him was Diana (née Baron), a wardrobe mistress at Dundee Rep, whom he had met in 1972. They married the following year and had three daughters, Emma, Alice and Abigail, who all survive him, as do grandchildren Colin, Finley, Amelia and Gregor.

#scotland #scottish #history #dr who #companion #actor

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doomandgloomfromthetomb · 21 days

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Prairiewolf Meanders West

As I think I’ve mentioned! That band I play in — Prairiewolf — is miraculously heading out of our home state of Colorado for a handful of shows out west. May 15 at Atelier Mill in Salt Lake City with M. Sage and Ben Swisher! May 17 at Beauty Supply Arts in Oakland with Chuck Johnson! May 18 at 2220 Arts in Los Angeles with Hayden Pedigo, Leslie Stevens, DJ Bob Holmes (SUSS) and Liberate Elemental Forces! Holy Moses.

While I’m still in slight disbelief that it’s all actually happening … it’s all actually happening! If you happen to be in any of these fine cities, please come out and say hello to your friendly neighborhood Prairiewolf. The Boulder Weekly just called us “cosmic country asskickers” — that’s the kind of acclaim you can’t buy, people!

Prior to kicking ass in Utah and California, we’ll be playing a local show at one of our fave haunts, Cellar West Artisan Ales in Lafayette on Saturday, May 4, 6-8pm. If the weather’s good, we’ll be jamming old and new jams on the patio. Great beer, great pals, great times. See you there?

#prairiewolf

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