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autisticlancemcclain · 1 year

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From the goddamn moment he was born, Lance did not know peace.

Okay, yes, he’s being a little dramatic. But in his defense, he really hasn’t ever known peace — you try living with nine older sisters on a farm. That shit is hard. Lance didn’t experience silence until he was four years old, only a delicate child, and at the time it frightened him. He’s been surrounded by noise and chaos (and more noise, somehow) since his inception, basically.

So you can understand why the castle is kind of a nightmare for him.

Growing up, whenever he was annoyed by his family (which was frequently), he would stomp off the the barn and yell about how when he was grown, he was going to move out to a private beach house and never hear another soul again. He’d bitch and moan to the cattle about how he couldn’t wait to grow up and finally sleep in a room all his own, with no annoying sisters or nosy roommates or anything, really. He’d mutter about it every time Hunk read his journal, fume about it every time his sisters banged on the bathroom door and yelled at him to hurry up. He swore up and down to everyone that would listen that when he finally found peace there would not be a goddamn thing in the world and beyond that would stop him from protecting it.

Well, then he got his peace, in the form of a castle that doubled as a graveyard. His own room, for once in his life, and not a single person to bother him unless it was life threatening, basically.

And oh, how Lance hated it.

He tossed and turned like no one’s business on the first days, but brushed it off as getting used to a new space. And as he kept tossing and turning, night after night, getting maybe three hours of scattered sleep of he was lucky, he continued to blame it on a myriad of things: fear of a freaky haunted castle, weirdly stiff Altean beds, freezing cold castle temperatures, nightmares. All true things, of course, but eventually Lance had to concede — the castle was too goddamn quiet.

Tough pill to swallow, that one.

He’d tried to handle it himself. Stole Pidge’s headphones, hummed out loud to himself; hell, he even left the bathroom sink running for some white noise. None of it worked. None of it was the same as the constant sound of someone breathing right next to you, the grumbles of their snores and strange mutterings of their sleep-talk. The very thing Lance hated with a passion turned out to be the one thing that actually helped his insomniac ass actually sleep. Mother nature, you trick-ass bitch. You have a personal problem.

Now, of course there was an easy solution to this. He shared the castle with six other people — one of them his Garrison roommate! Surely, he could bunk with someone else.

But… no one else seemed to have trouble sleeping. At least, not for the same reason as Lance. And as much as Lance liked to play the obnoxious role, as much as nothing was funnier than pushing just the right buttons to make someone else explode… he couldn’t be that much of a nuisance. It was too much.

So Lance got real used to being sleep deprived.

Of course, he wasn’t stupid about it. He never went more than three days without sleep. On particularly rough nights, he’d crash Hunk or Pidge’s rooms raving about a sleepover, or convince the rest of the team that they should have a movie night, and then just happen to fall asleep right there on the couch. By circumstance, he and Shiro ended up helping each other out pretty often, too — the black paladin was kept up by nightmares about as often as Lance was by plain old insomnia. The man was usually too proud to accept Lance’s help, but every once in a while he allowed it, and they both slept soundly, for once.

Keith, though?

His help was a surprise.

Keith, as it turns out, has as much pent-up energy as the goddamn Energizer Bunny on steroids. On days they don’t have missions that will pump them full of so much adrenaline their hearts are at risk, he trains himself to exhaustion, else he’ll be up all night.

Training with him doesn’t do anything for Lance’s insomnia. It does, however, do wonders for their relationship.

Without Lance’s permission, angry, after-hour fights evolve into playfully competitive spars. Those spars evolve into genuine lessons, both of them teaching each other things neither ever considered learning before. (Turns out Lance’s flexibility comes in handy in swordfights, and Keith’s reflexes lead to excellent pistol work. Who knew?) And then, week by week, month by month, those late nights turn into a tension so thick that neither of them can bear it.

It may have been Keith to make the first move, but Lance thinks he deserves some credit. They wouldn’t be here without his complete inability to sleep like a normal person, after all.

The great thing about dating someone, though, is that eventually, bed-sharing comes into the mix. Eventually both parties start looking for excuses to stay in each other’s space just a little bit longer.

Lord above, is it ever a relief.

No longer does Lance need to desperately look for an excuse after seventy-two straight hours of prying his eyes open. Now he justs follows Keith to his room when the night cycle starts, wrapping around him like an octopus and stealing his warmth like a leech. Keith is the worst, most annoying sleeper in the world — he snores, he tosses and turns, and regularly talks and even yells in his sleep — and Lance fucking relishes it. It is a relief of biblical proportions to finally be able to have a good night’s rest, on a regular fucking basis.

It does, though, make nights when he has to sleep in his own room that much worse.

He doesn’t even have to, technically. Like, there’s no indication that Keith ever wants him to go back. In fact, the man always pouts when Lance stops at his own door, muttering petulantly to himself as he presses a kiss to Lance’s forehead and makes his way to his own room. Honestly, Keith would probably like it if Lance moved into his room, for good.

Lance bites his lip, considering.

Still. He doesn’t want to be annoying.

But there’s no way to know unless he goes for it, right?

“Hey, babe,” Lance tries, testing the waters. They’re both in the bathroom, getting ready for bed; Keith braiding his hair as Lance applies a myriad of skin products to his face. “Do you think you could make some room in your dresser for my socks? And, like, other clothes?”

Is it a coward’s way to voice what he’s really asking? Yeah. But Lance is nervous, okay? Cut him some slack. If this backfires then he’s back to sleeping twice a fuckin’ week.

Keith stills. He abandons his hair, turning slowly to face Lance. Lance looks away, fiddling with the hem of his pajama shirt.

“Lance,” Keith says, placing both hands on his shoulders. He’s quiet until Lance finally looks up at him.

“Yeah?”

Keith’s face is mission-level serious; eyebrows drawn together over dark indigo eyes, mouth set in a firm line.

“I would reach my hands into a live fire and swallow hot coals for you if you asked me to. Do you understand that?”

There’s a beat of silence. Keith’s expression remains unmoving, dead-serious, entirely unfazed by what he just said.

Lance bursts out laughing, shoulders shaking under Keith’s heavy hands, leaning forward to rest his forehead on Keith’s collarbones.

God. This is Keith. Why was he nervous, again?

“I just need a couple drawers, doofus. No need for theatrics.”

Keith presses a kiss to his hair. “Just want to make sure we’re on the same page. Yes, by the way. I cleared out half my shit weeks ago. I’ve been waiting for you to finally move all the way in.”

Lance smiles, hidden against Keith’s shirt.

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.”

He never has to worry about sleep again.

———

based off this video

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ananaslices · 1 year

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guys--

i think i have a type??

#the blue goofball who masks his insecurities with a jokester personality #and he struggles to be part of the team #and he is so skilled and talented #and he has conflicts with the leader in red #we love them #they need more love #oh and hes queercoded too #maybe gay #maybe bi #and so many more options #vld #voltron #lance mcclain #vld lance #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise leo #rottmnt leo #rise leonardo

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electricsynthesis · 1 month

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lance’s parents are two trauma nurses who met because they were coworkers. his father went on to be an EMT in an ambulance for the hospital they work for while his mother stayed in the ER trauma wing. they work long grueling hours saving people’s lives. They are both kind of workaholics. frequently they bring their children to work with them. Obviously not into the trauma ER but y’know. To the hospital. by the time luis (the sibling I assume is the oldest) is a teenager he’s already wrangling his younger siblings and babysitting them and shit.

None of this is to say the mcclain parents are like, deadbeat. No sir. they are the kind of overachievers who can work 1000 years and still have time to care for their kids. (to be clear, the older siblings do a lot of the on the ground stuff once they’re older. like cooking. But the parents make sure to be around.) they go on trips a lot. holidays are for the family. Sunday church. If one of the kids has a school thing, one of them will take time off or call out to go. they are masters at coordinating . It’s intimidating how much they can do in a day. The type people who wake up at 4 am and have a months worth of shit done by the time they pass out at 11 pm. They function on no sleep and somehow they are not burnt out .

and they love their kids soooo fucking much but here is the thing here is the thing here is the thing. They expect this kind of overachieving-lack-of-burnout-5-hours-of-sleep insanity from their kids. Which isn’t to say that they’re scrutinizing their kids’ every action but moreso that they just assume everyone can keep up with them. yeah of course luis is babysitting his siblings and worrying about the SAT, what’s wrong with that. That’s normal. I could’ve done that ?

this is a home life that creates insane honors student children who will grow up to get 2 phds and change the world or total burnouts. Zero inbetween. all of lance’s older siblings are the former and lance is fucking HURTLING towards being the latter.

my headcanon for the siblings ages goes from oldest to youngest is luis -> veronica -> marco -> rachel & lance (lance is a few minutes younger). The sibling named rachel looks a lot like lance so I like to headcanon them as twins.

luis: 30, a psychiatrist at a private practice, married with 2 children

veronica: 27, field medic/pilot for the military, specifically with the nevada galaxy garrison base (everyone being just a pilot is boring, sorry) (I headcanon the shows garrison base as being in nevada because I think it’s a cute area-51 reference)

marco: 25, working on his thesis for a phd in marine biology. certified outdoorsman, likes to spend his free time on exploratory seafaring vessels doing ocean science stuff

rachel & lance: 16 (the surprise menopause babies!)

Anyway she’s his #burnout solidarity she has it worse than him. he was like okay. Okokkkkokokokokok I’m going to go into the military and he completely washed out of the fighter pilot program because he doesn’t have enough talent to make up for his god given ADHD need to procrastinate. rachel just went to normal highschool and her lack of extracurriculars and middling-to-bad grades was the family’s nuclear explosion ( Before lance went missing—) because everyone thought she wanted to kill herself . She kind of did.

She has all of lance’s issues with insecurity and none of his false confidence. she’s shy and anxious a lot of the time. But she’s smart. Witty. quick and sarcastic. She’s the alt kid of the family . Will unprompted complain about things like Society and Capitalism and The Government. internet commie. was a crybaby as a kid but grew into a weirdly jaded teenager.

lance is obviously the obnoxious youngest sibling. he’s loud and attention seeking and annoying on purpose. he hates being alone and will be irritating just to get you to let him hang out with you. Exactly the type of kid to follow his older siblings around and whine until they let him hang out with them and their friends.

marco is the chill sibling. A gamer. he’s like always 100% of the time stressed out of his mind about school but it’s looped back around to making him really really really outwardly calm. interpersonal conflict does nothing to him because he’s too busy exploding with terror about his grades. the only thing that makes him feel calm is the ocean. used to go with his uncles on (noncommercial, hobby) fishing trips and it sparked an utter adoration for the sea in him. he’s a lot older than rachel & lance but he’s the closest with them, he was happy to babysit them & hang out with them. Introduced them to video games

veronica is a hardass. she was the patented Overachiever Kid. was playing sports, in academic clubs, and played an instrument all before she was in middle school. she drops some of this as she gets older but proceeds to pour all her energy into academics. she’s not valedictorian or anything but she’s spending like every day at school until 5 pm doing science shit. has absolutely 0 tolerance for bullshit. A rule follower down to her core. thrives off of approval from authority. got her bachelor’s in premed. was hit with a crushing, all-consuming existential dread about What Will She Do After School. so she decided to join the military about it.

luis was the goody two shoes kid who rebelled preeeetty hard as a young adult. he was perfectly well behaved all his childhood, earning the approval of both his parents. he babysat his siblings. did well in school. checked all the boxes of Stuff He Was Supposed To Do. and then he went off to college for his premed bachelors as soon as he physically could and proceeded to go INSANE. absolutely BONKERS. utterly unmoored without his family to ground him and completely out of his depth. did bad in school drank got into crazy college drama and most importantly of all. Didn’t talk to anyone at home

he eventually met who would (eventually) become his wife and proceeded to make important emotional connections thus making him more able to both live on his own and return to his little siblings, whom he loves deeply

but by the time lance is a teenager we have: a PhD haver, a lieutenant, and a PhD student, plus 2 nurses in the ER

and this is why lance has confidence issues

#voltron legendary defender #lance mcclain

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luvendiary · 2 years

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Fic Recommendations <3

some fics that i really like and if you haven't read the yet, you totally should! i will update this regularly! feel free to recommend anything so i can put it on here!

Percy Jackson

Percy

the witch and the fish: the illustrious son of the sea is spending the summer in the hamptons with his family and unbeknownst to him an old friend is his next door neighbor for this summer.

talk to me: in which (y/n) gets hurt and says a few incriminating things while in pain.

my boyfriend: in which percy is the coolest person in the world— right behind you, of course

[14:20]

Various

how they would hold your hands

attractive things they do

characters as romance tropes

How to Train Your Dragon

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III

dating hiccup would include

fluff alphabet

"what's all this blood?"

Various

dragon riders christmas gift headcanons: dragon riders open up their xmas gift from their s/o and it is a very detailed wood carving of them riding their dragon.

Criminal Minds

Aaron Hotchner

these will mostly be daughter!reader, bc i have a soft spot for hotch as a father.

if we had five more minutes...: (aaron hotchner x daughter!reader) hotch wishes he had five more minutes.

hotches daughter: morgan and reid bring you down to ask you some questions on a recent case, not knowing who your father is.

why: you mourn over the death of you adoptive mother.

they'd bring you back: you’re an unsub’s latest target, but your personality is way more than he bargained for.

Spencer Reid

how to play the game

tear me apart: based on episode 23, season 7. where the reader gets caught in a bank heist

work song

roomate!spencer coming home after no one remembered his birthday

Voltron

Keith Kogane

i'm not going anywhere: you’ve been dating keith for about six months, but you’ve only recently met his group of friends. he’s worried that they each have more to offer you than he does, and his insecurities eat away at him until you calm him down.

imagine keith kogane breaking you out of a galra prison

dating keith kogane

bf keith hcs

lucky charm: teaching lance the ways of smooth flirting are very hard , and for keith , acting as your practice dummy is even harder.

allura´s sister: being the younger sibling to Allura meant no eyes were on you, that is until Keith met your gaze.

pain: even when fueled by pure fury and determination

lance´s sister: keith kogane finds himself being questioned by one mcclain to find himself answering to the other

keith with an artistic s/o

hc keith dating allura's younger sister

the five times he didn't

runaways: in which you and Keith are both runaways who end up meeting outside of a motel – neither of you have enough money for one room, so you end up taking a risk and putting your money together, buying one room between the two of you – despite being complete strangers.

sunshine: Keith Kogane was insufferable. An absolute nightmare to be around. So why are you getting visions of him kissing you?

change of plans: now that Keith Kogane is a rockstar, it’s become very difficult to decipher whether someone likes him for him, or for his money. So, he’s decided to just stay as far away from love as possible.

Various

reuniting when he returns to earth

paladins accidentally hurting reader

Harry Potter

Marauders Era

Remus Lupin

the girl with the books: james and sirius notice that it’s not the books that keep remus in the library, and are determined to know whether you – the object of remus’s affection – return his feelings.

we'll never have sex: you’re used to boys wanting one thing and one thing only from you, causing you to be thrown off when Remus Lupin kisses you, just to kiss you. based off of “We’ll Never Have Sex” by Leith Ross.

heavy handed: your debut as the marauders’ new guitarist doesn’t exactly go to plan when remus gets handsy with you on stage.

bassist!remus x reader

remus giving a sweet little message before playing the song he wrote for you.

James Potter

we deserve this life: your beautifully regular life with your husband years after the war

james bodyguard au

Golden Trio Era

Harry Potter

imagine being wolfstar's daughter and having a jily type love story with harry

Fred Weasley

always little wolf: while y/n and Fred walk home in the snow, the simplest conversation makes Fred sure of one thing, he's going to marry that girl.

Theo Nott

the only heaven i'll be sent to (is when i'm alone with you): y/n and theo get dared to spend 7 minutes in heaven and interesting conversation ensues.

last kiss

theodore nott as your boyfriend

what's it like to be theodore nott's girlfriend

MCU

Peter Parker

celestial beings: there's a reason why peter parker can't keep his eyes off of you.

something to remember me by: reader and happy visit may's grave and peter is there. you don't remember him

daddy's got a gun: (tasm!peter x hotchner!reader) in which peter meets your dad - aaron hotchner.

just barely: (tasm!peter x reader) “okay, peter. are you afraid of spiders?” “no.” “then can you go get the one in my apartment?”

heated

Bucky Barnes

the bet: the agents at SHIELD have not taken well to Bucky’s pardon. When he’s injured on a mission under suspicious circumstances, you take matters into your own hands.

Narnia

Peter Pevensie

the golden witch: y/n returns to narnia with the pevensies and discovers something powerful about herself.

jealous confessions: war times are complicated and feelings tent to get overwhelming. when jealousy hits peter, he doesn't know what to do, you don't know what to make of it, and you two end up… "confessing".

an unexpected turn: your night took an unexpected turn when you follow after the high king during an important ball. you certainly didn’t think the stroll would lead to a fencing lesson.

Edmund Pevensie

taking care of you: edmund sneaks in to make sure his queen is alright.

set during the events of prince caspian

hearts are beating: reader discovers that she’s pregnant and tells their s/o, edmund

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klance-dreams · 5 months

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insecure lance / protective keith

super niche but that’s my shit suite on you by: adelfie, Word Count: 12,200, Rating: T+, Summary: Lance feels a little jarred when he sees nothing friendly in the suitemate’s eyes, and then foolish. He scrambles to find something to say.“Do you have any rules?”Keith’s eyes darken. “Yeah. Don’t bother me this semester. Or ever.”Accident-prone Lance McClain learns that his grumpy suitemate, Keith,…

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#- Hurt Comfort #adhd #au #College #emotionally hurt #flustered lance #homesick #lances adhd #Langst #neurodivergence #neurodivergent #protective keith #ptsd

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greyfix · 6 months

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Children

Title: Children

Ship: Keith Kogane/Lance McClain

Summary: Keith and Lance are children with the weight of the world on their shoulders. At only 16 and 17 years old these children were made Paladins of Voltron, Blades of Marmora, Saviors of the Universe. Those weren’t titles meant for children.

Word Count:6.1k

Requested By: n/a

Warnings/Tags: Angst, Fluff, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Pining Lance, Lance is a mess, Insecure lance, Galra Keith, Keith is bad at feelings, Keith is a mess, Blade of Marmora Keith, Blade of Marmora, Naxzela, pining keith.

Author’s Note: listen, i know i never write anymore. But, shit happens you know?

I’m taking requests and commissions again though so hopefully that will change, i have menus posted on my linktree. You can Instagram message me ( @greyfixx ) or email me ([email protected]) and i’d be happy to write your stories. Thanks guys!

Ao3, Tumblr

Lance wanders the castleship often now. He spends much more time walking around aimlessly than doing anything productive that’s for sure. Hunk and Pidge seemed as though they were always making some revolutionary advances. Always inventing something or tweaking something. Lance could never keep up.

Allura seems as though she always has some diplomatic stuff to tend to with Shiro. If you asked Lance, he’d tell you that’s just an excuse so they can do whatever they do when they're alone. Plus, hanging out with Shiro is like, well it is, hanging out with your commanding officer. It’s hard for me to be comfortable. He would hang out with Coran sometimes, helping with some of the castle maintenance. It almost reminded him of being back home doing the chores. He never thought chores would be something he missed.

Still, when the lonely day was done, he had to return to the cold sterile room. It was so lifeless. Despite the trinkets he’d collected from his travels strewn around the room, the lived in clutter, it still didn’t feel like his room, no matter how hard he tried. Pictures weren’t as prominent in space, he’d noticed, at least not hard copies or for decoration in general. I guess they went completely digital a long time ago. So it wasn’t common for one to have photos of their family hung up around their homes. He wonders if people keep photos of their families outside of earth, or if it isn’t something people generally care about? For Lance, who’d spent his whole life surrounded by his siblings, it was so terribly lonely. Almost like living in a hospital room that never had a visitor.

So he slept in his cold white bed with his thin sheets and flat pillows. He wore his thin pajamas and the unreasonably comfy castle bathrobe. This was his new normal. His new home. He’s always been so grateful for his family, the original one, and the new ones he had created along the way. That’s what made him so sad, that he had a whole family here and he still felt alone.

It wasn’t always like this. Lance suspected that they didn’t really have enough time to worry about it as things changed. Now, between battles, there is silence. What does the silence hold for the soldiers in the war? These are the thoughts that plagued Lance as he fell asleep.. There weren’t many sweet dreams on the other side of the unconscious curtain waiting for him.

This is how he had felt since Keith had left. On the outside they seemed to be all bitter arguments, competitive bravado, and rivalry. They both knew though, that on the inside, they were closer than anyone else on the team. And that was their business. Their banter was just that, banter. It only takes a little bit of care to see the flirting smiles and friendly wrestling through the veil. When the fighting is done and it’s time for the brains behind the scenes, Keith and Lance learned to stay out of the way. They weren’t geniuses, or commanders, or Royalty. This wasn’t their job.

Each evening he spends longing for the company he wishes he had. He wishes for just one night things could be back the way they were. He wishes that if he does have to be lonely, he shouldn’t have to be the only one. . He considers it. He also considers the embarrassment of it. Calling the Blade of Marmora Headquarters to talk to his friend because he misses him? They’ll laugh and hang up. Probably give Keith shit for it, and i don’t want to mess things up for him. We’re soldiers. We’re supposed to be doing more with our time than talking to our friends on secure military lines.

He accepts his fate.

Though it may be silent between battles, for those who are much more than soldiers it was time to make a lot of noise.. Building a good public image. Recruiting to the cause. Diplomacy, gaining allies. Creating a Coalition.. Coran had them traveling to a new planet each and every day putting on shows and meeting people. Selling Voltron.

It wasn’t a big deal in the beginning. Just a script reading here and there, and Lance always loved Drama as a kid, so he was more than happy to comply. It felt like filming a cheesy TV commercial, and it was fun. Over time, as the audience got larger and larger, Coran got more intense. Their characters became perverted versions of themselves. Lance was now “Loverboy Lance.” He was nothing but a good looking airhead. There wasn’t anything more to him than his ability to get laid everywhere he goes. Because that’s all it takes to be a Paladin of Voltron, apparently.

Coran had become increasingly erratic. He’s talking differently, and twitches everywhere he goes. He’s taking dangerous risks, not only with diplomacy but with their safety.

Lance was starting to believe that that’s who he was. Maybe he is the only one who hasn’t noticed yet. He isn’t anything but who they believe he is. Loverboy. What is a loverboy without love? Just a boy. Just a boy in a play. Just a boy with the weight of the world in his universe. Just a boy. Alone. In a hospital room.

When Lance realized that the pressure of being a part of this war drove Coran to believe he needed a brain worm to do the right thing or to be good enough. Coran, the purest being on this ship, resorted to drugs to be as good as everyone else. Lance knew he was lonely too. He wanted it to stop, because though he didn’t care too much about himself, he certainly cared about his family.

So Lance grew angry. He was so angry all the time that his family was diminished into nothing but comic book characters. His best friend is depicted as nothing other than comedic flatulence. Pidge rendered a fraud who uses fake words. They aren’t recognized as the amazing scientists they truly are. They should be. Keith. He made Keith all angry and lonely. Can’t he see, that’s not who Keith is.

Keith has raw power and talent. He’s the potential to do something amazing for the world. He’s an anomaly and he is so important. There is no one more important than him.

Lance is the one filled with anger and sadness and loneliness.

Keith is hopeful.

And things keep piling on. He is lonely. He is sad. He is angry. And Hope is gone.

Laying on his gurney in his cold hospital room, in his magical alien castle, Lance picked up his space tablet and dialed the space number for the secret space soldiers.

DIAL

Lance called the Blade of Marmora’s direct communications line.

“State your Business.” Spoke a dark gravelly voice.

“I’m Lance, Blue Paladin of Voltron. I’m calling to speak to Keith Kogane? The red Paladin of Voltron?” He was shaking. This is pathetic. How could he be doing this right now, there’s no way Keith would want to talk to him. He’s probably got a bunch of new muscle-y galra friends.

“Should I provide you with his direct communications line?”

Lance froze for a moment. Why wouldn’t he be able to call Keith? Why would the Blade stop him from communicating with his Paladins? That would be ridiculous. “Um yeah, yes please, that would be great, um, yeah.” He stammered out in rapid succession.

He rattles off a bunch of numbers and symbols that Lance makes sure to write down before speaking again. “Will that be all?”

“Um yes, thank you so–”

Beep.

He hung up on me!!

Once he got over the scandal that was the rudeness of what could only be referred to as the ‘galra receptionist,’ he sat in silence for a while. He stared at the string of numbers and symbols. “Keith’s Direct Communications line.” He doesn’t really know what stopped him from getting it before.

It wasn’t long before he typed the number into his tablet.

!0070/01812/12-12! → DIAL

He hit the flashing dial button before he could talk himself out of it.. Inter-Galaxy phone calls didn’t have a dial tone like on earth. There’s a loading screen. If the person you’re calling hasn’t answered by the time the circle is filled, the signal will be canceled and the call will drop. Messages can be sent as well but it wasn’t customary to have your tablet on you at all times, as it would be with a phone on earth. It’s more like having an I-Pad instead of a phone. If you really wanted a response it was best to call.

The circle is barely filled in when the screen explodes in color. It was Keith. His brows furrowed and lips pursed for a moment, until his eyes widened and his teeth showed. He smiled. That wasn’t at all what Lance was expecting.

“Hey, Keith. It’s been a minute.” His voice wavers as he speaks.

“No shit! Is everything okay? You’ve never called before-” he started to look concerned again.

“No! No not at all…” He trailed off. He knew if he said this he would never hear the end of it, but he didn’t want to start the call on such a negative note. He went with what can be interpreted positively.. “I missed you man. It’s lonely around here when you’re gone.”

Keith laughed. When he caught Lance’s eyes and realized that he wasn’t smiling with him, his face dropped. “You don’t mean that?”

“Of course I do. Everyone here is so much smarter and more important than me. I hang around on my own most of the time.”

“I thought I was supposed to be the lone wolf. You’re usually a social butterfly.”

“Everyone’s so busy I don't want to bother them.”

“Well I haven't changed from my lonely ways, so you must annoy me like the butterfly you are.”

“...What?” Lance held back his laughter.

“Shut up.”

“The butterfly I am.” The smile seeped through and before he knew it the both of them had dissolved into hysterics.

“Shut up. I missed you too. I don’t exactly fit in here.”

Before Keith could get another ‘shut up’ out Lance teased,“Are you sure it isn’t just because you aren’t purple?”

“I’m pretty sure that was a little bit space racist.”

Lance gasped.

They talked for hours upon hours. They smiled and laughed until they felt their cheeks go raw and their abs get sore. They talked until their faces turned stoick and they had run out of good things to talk about. They talk until things get serious, and then they keep talking.

Keith tells Lance how he feels worthless because he has always been a prodigy at the things the BoM excel at. The things that Earth doesn’t hold as honor the way the Galra do. Now, he’s nothing special.

Lance tells Keith how he feels like he’s been deluding himself into thinking he belongs. He tells him how he doesn’t believe he’s a true Paladin, and that he’s probably just a placeholder for him or Allura. That the persona that the public has for him as ‘Loverboy’ is so entirely impossible because the only person he loves is so far away that he can’t even tell him that every day.

They talk about how lonely they are. And they promise each other that though things can never be perfect, they will always keep each other company.

However, as many hours as they wish they could spend together, everything comes to an end. Keith has private training early in the mornings and the Castleship will be landing in a different timezone. So for Lance, first thing in the morning is about 4 in the afternoon (If you think about earth time, measurements are fine and dandy in altean, but dates are hell.) and he has to go straight to a diplomatic dinner party.

They say their goodbyes, and part with smiles on their faces.

When Lance turns over on his bed, his pillow is wet until the morning. Or 4 O’Clock in the alien planet’s evening He wakes up sore from his hiccupping breaths and dry from the salt on his skin.

Keith on the other hand forces himself to fall asleep immediately. When he wakes up he throws himself into training. He doesn’t apologize to himself or anyone else for the extra bruises he cost that morning. Anyone who spoke to him was met with a scathing comment about their mother. Most stood clear of him that day.

That night was too good to be true.

They spend months in this circle of suffering. Each day they would spend in anticipation of the joy they would feel when they saw each other. By the time they are able to get on the phone, they can’t stop smiling.

The joy lasts for a while. For a few hours. But every night the call has to end. Every night they have to say goodbye again. Every night they come crashing down from their high. They are hit with the weight of the various crises and the pressure only increases with the added emotions. At the end of the call, they have to say goodbye. Every night.

And I can't even say I Love You.

For Lance, the worst part is that no one noticed. He spent his days finally in a better mood, and his friends weren’t phased. It was such a dramatic change, how could a friend not notice the smiles that had grown so scarce. How could they not notice the bags under his eyes were gone, and he was no longer covered in bruises from his early morning training bot sessions. He felt so much better yet to his friends it was as though nothing had changed. Or they didn’t care to notice.

The Blade of Marmora was absolutely baffled by Keith’s change. Though Keith was much better at hiding it, he had learned in his months spent with the Blade that Galra rely on their sense of smell for this kind of thing much more than they would rely on their interpretation of body language. Pheromones change and there is nothing you can do about it. The Galra use it to communicate, though generally in passing the smell is like hearing the hum of conversation in a large crowd.

He didn't notice it at first. He thought he was imagining the stares he could feel grazing the back of his neck. It took one of the other people in his training group giving him shit to realize it.

“You need to learn how to keep your scent under control..”

“... What?”

“You’re scent. We can all tell you’re excited or anticipating, or whatever, you don’t need to broadcast it, have a little control.”

“What do you mean by my scent? You’re sniffing me??”

“Dude what?”

“I have no clue what you’re talking about.”

“Ha ha very funny. Just keep it to yourself man.””

“Seriously, I have no clue what you’re talking about. I’m a little bit concerned because on earth we don’t exactly make a habit of smelling each other.””

“Earth?”

“Yeah? Haven’t you noticed I'm not exactly purple?”

“I mean, yeah, but I didn't realize you were from the middle of nowhere. I’ve never even heard of that country.”

“It’s a planet.”

Keith could tell that he is holding back his laughter now.

“The Empire hasn’t gotten as far as my planet yet, so I didn't know I was part galra until very recently.

“I don’t know if i’m the person to explain it to you, i don’t have the greatest understanding of it myself either.”

“Just tell me before someone else does.”

“I think it’s like pheromones? We can smell the hormones and the smell changes with your emotions.”

Keith sighed, before stalking back off to his room. This was the first time he contacted Lance during the day.

Keith: I just found out galra can sense pheromones.

Lance: You wut?

Keith: Apparently depending on our emotions we smell different.

Lance: Can you? Smell emotions?

Keith: I never thought about it. I definitely smell a lot more than humans can. One of the Blades told me that most galra learn to control it. Maybe humans don’t emit strong enough pheromones for me to smell.

Lance: Is it like, rude to have emotions?

Keith: I wouldn’t be surprised. Galra never seemed like a race of emotionally sensitive people.

There were invisible boundaries. To keep them from having too much hope, too much happiness. At first the boundary was just speaking to each other in general, because of course they couldn’t be happy together if they weren’t together.

Lance, evidently, broke that one. Keith wished it were never there in the first place.

Keith was the one to break the next boundary and Lance was overjoyed. He kept his tablet on him at all times, though he was careful not to let anyone see. He wanted to keep this to himself. Just for now.

Each time he got a message from Keith, he had to force himself to not smile. It was becoming a problem. At least for a while.

Soon, not only were the nights terrible, but the days became just as painful. The light drains out of the both of them as they no longer spend their days in excitement to speak to each other but in increasing agony over their distance. Their feelings for eachother grow larger and stronger. So strong that every moment they aren’t allowed to feel it hurts more.

They lose the time to talk. The war is becoming back to back battles once again. Manpower is needed more than ever so not only is Voltron busy, but so is the Blade. The Coalition is a lot, but there is only so much. It’s difficult to organize universe wide diplomatic meetings, even for Allura.

The lows that follow leaving each other bleed into the days when no time can be found to speak. They bleed into the days where all that can be spoken of us ugly. The days of war. Of death. Of sacrifice. The days where the fight for freedom goes on and the soldiers grow weary.

Still the same problems prevailed. Lance’s turmoil continued to go unnoticed. He continued to be invisible in his own home amongst his own family.

Keith longed for his family. For Lance. He wished he could be with them. He wished so hard that it was very apparent to anyone who had a sense of smell worth their salt knew. He was now considered a flight risk. This he scoffed at. As if I’d leave all of you to die just to go home. That’s the catch. His love for his family and his refusal to allow lives to be lost to an empire as vial as Zarkons. He won’t abandon the war, not even for his own happiness.

Then the day comes. There is a planet called Naxzela. It’s primarily a military outpost for the empire. If the Coalition is able to take and free Naxzela from Empire control, they will have gained control of a third of the Galran Empire.

The entire Coalition is gathered, doing their best to stop the Empire, around a planet called Naxzela. They fight with everything they have. Every second, someone dies. Every second a ship falls from the sky, not only on their side, but on the Coalition's side as well.

Voltron is on that planet. Keith’s family is on that planet. Lance is on that planet. Keith fights harder. Another ship drops from the sky. Another. Another. Another. Another.

Voltron returns. Alive. That’s the good news though, an when it comes to war, it never outweighs the bad. They come back with information. They say the planet had been habitable only because of Altean terraforming technology. Haggar had tapped into this technology and turned the planet into a bomb. The battleship is the detonator. Both the planet and the ship are protected by shields.

The whole Coalition opens fire.

Not a scratch.

“Maybe not with our weapons.”

Keith takes off, dodging the lasers he soars directly towards the battleship. If our weapons can’t take down the shields, we need something more. The full force of a Blade of Marmora fighter ship just might work.

If i don’t succeed we will all die. At least this way only one of us is gone. At least this way the pain will go away.

He didn’t close his eyes as he approached his death. He wasn’t afraid. He knew this was the right thing to do. He chose this, he would not shy away from it. So he looked right at the thin purple glow that would be the end of him. He stared and confronted his death. The veil blinked out of existence.

He jerked the ship away and went sailing just by the edge of the ship. He had stopped listening to the commotion on his audio comm. It was time to tune back in.

Lotor.

Lotor had saved his life.

After the battle, Keith finally was able to return to the Castleship. To return home. Immediately when he steps off his ship a force knocks into him and he nearly topples him over. It’s so warm. He can smell him. He really is home.

“You fucking idiot!” Anyone could tell that Lance is screaming, despite the fact that he’s muffled by Keith’s shoulder. “How dare you.”

Keith doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know which words to choose. He is so happy and so sad. So he is quiet.

He is quiet and so is Lance as they walk to the infirmary. They ignore the aftermath of the battle. They ignore the Paladins, the rebels, the Blades. They ignore anyone trying to get their attention. Hand in hand, they are the silence between the battles. Lance's eyes are soft when the pod closes. Keith is glad that is the last thing he sees before falling into a deep sleep.

It is three days before he leaves the pod. Lance waits there in the infirmary the whole time. Coran says that most of his injuries weren’t from the battle. There were minor bruises, sprains, even some fractures from weeks past littered across his body.

Lance waits for three days and he doesn’t say a word to anyone besides Coran when he’s questioning after Keith’s progress. Even then his speech is limited. This is when his family finally notices they’ve missed something.

Over these three days Lance practically moves in. One of the gurneys is claimed as his. The white floors are littered with the tissues he hasn’t bothered to pick up. The bowls and spoons he used for the occasional food goo have created a pile in the corner. There are five blankets. Two on Lance’s gurney (he’d always thought they were too thin) and three laying on the floor just by Keith’s pod. One to lay on, two to keep him warm when he sleeps on the cold white metal.

He spent a lot of time thinking, while he waited. He thought about a lot of things. Mainly how he almost lost Keith. He almost lost Keith before he was even able to tell him how he truly feels. He spent a lot of this time regretting. He regretted not telling him the most. They both knew. They knew their lives were on the line and they made that their reason to live in fear. They chose that as their reason to not take responsibility for themselves, their reason to run from their own feelings, their reason to punish themselves.

This is war. Lance realized. This is war, and I am brave enough to be fighting it. I should be allowed to love before I die.. Especially if I'm risking my life for theirs. To make sure they don’t have to. If I die out here I don't want to die in regret, never having lived my truth.

The fourth morning he laid awake on his blankets staring up at Keith. He didn’t look ill at all anymore. He must be almost completely healed by now, he looked just like the Keith that had left. Almost. He had grown taller, his hair had gotten longer. He joked about it being a mullet before, but now it was more than long enough to be braided. He wished he could, it was something he did for his sisters back home.

His thoughts are interrupted when he hears the electronic schwooop of the pod-shield lowering. He doesn’t have time to get up on his feet before Keith is toppling down.

“It’s okay. I’ve got you. You’re safe.” Lance says immediately, when Keith falls into his arms. He holds him tightly. It isn’t long before Keith does the same. They both know that Coran and Allura would have been alerted to Keith’s discharge from the pod and would be heading down to check on him. They took the time they had alone to hold onto each other.

“Is this real?” Keith asks, his voice is so meek. So thin and quiet.

“Yes, my love. This is real. I’m here. You’re safe.”

Keith melts into Lance's arms. “I’m home?”

“You’re home.”

They hear footsteps outside the infirmary door before they see anyone. They aren’t surprised to see the whole team walk in. They would all want to see Keith when he was better. Lance wasn’t the only one who had missed him. He was family.It would be wrong if they didn’t want to see him after the stunt he’d pulled either.

Shiro is the first to stalk into the room, with his big muscular body and his big powerful steps. “What the hell is going on here Lance? You’ve been uncollaborative and disrespectful for long enough. It ends now.” He shouts in his best commanding officer voice.

Keith flinches. Lance squeezes him for a moment, before standing up. “You lost your right to give me orders. If i’ve been ‘uncollaborative and disrespectful’ then it’s obviously been a long time since you’ve looked in a mirror. Especially when your reaction to seeing your brother for the first time in months fall out of a pod because he nearly killed himself.”

Shiro opens his mouth to speak only to be cut off. This time it is Coran.

“I think he’s right, Shiro.” His voice is tense and serious. This never happens. “Let the boy speak.”

Lance almost smiled. It seemed, recently, that Coran was the only one who truly cared. At the very least, he understood.

“Keith almost dies, and your reaction when he comes out of a pod, three days later probably still coming down from an adrenaline high not only from his near death experience but from the drugs that pod pumped him full of. Your brother comes home from zero contact and your reaction is to storm in and make demands?” Lance speaks to his family. He speaks to his family in a situation other than battle for the first time in weeks. Months. “You really think you’re the one who deserves answers?”

Lance kneels next to Keith once again. “You need food, water, and to relax.” His voice was soft now. “Do you want to go back to the bedrooms and wait for me there?”

Keith stands up. “I’m going to stay here. With you.” Same old Keith he sounds like. Only Lance could hear the slight quiver in his voice.

“Lance?” Hunk spoke, concerned, “Buddy, what’s going on? What are we missing?”

Lance almost laughed. It was a surprise to him. He hadn’t smiled without Keith in a long time. This wasn’t the context he wanted that to happen under. “What have I been doing?” He said decidedly.

Hunk looked confused.

“What do you mean by that?” Pidge.

“These last few months. What. Have. I Been. Doing>”

“The same as the rest of us.” Pidge spoke in that matter of fact way of hers.

“Yeah, you helped with the performances. You're loverboy Lance!”

“Exactly. I was Loverboy Lance. That explains so much.” Lance decides that they won’t ever realize on their own. He must open their eyes himself. He must be the one to hurt them. “When have you ever seen me do more than flirt with someone? When was the last time I went home with one, or brought one here? Hell, when was the last time I went on a date?”

Silence.

“I flirt. I sign autographs, I joke, and I tease. I have never been a player. I’ve never been Loverboy Lance, not in the way we showed the public. That’s not who I am. Just the same as any of you. Hunk, you are so much more than comedic flatulence, Pidge you aren’t a fraud you’re a genius and you know enough words to fill the script with that the audience will go home knowing how to turn their garbage disposal into a roomba. Allura, you’re your own Paladin, not Keith and there are so many amazing things about you that would make you just as interesting as Keith.

“Keith isn’t the Lone Wolf. He’s just lonely, he always has been. None of us ever pur in the effort to change that, so why would he in return?” Lance turned to Hunk. “You were my best friend, Hunk, and this hurts so much. It hurts so much to know that you can’t see me for who I really am. I look at all of you and see my family and then I wonder, where did you go?”

“I spent these last few months in Silence. I knew I wasn't good enough to keep up with you Pidge, Hunk. So I stayed away. I knew I would never live up to your expectations, Shiro, so I didn't bother with you either. I knew you didn’t want me around Allura, so I didn't stick around. I knew i would be left behind.

“Eventually I stopped speaking.”

Lance stopped then. He took a deep breath. “None of you noticed. My own family had made me feel as though I didn't belong, and so I stopped belonging. Of course you guys were so caught up in being amazing that you didn’t notice. That much I don't care about. This is what is important.

“How old are you, Pidge?”

“I’m fifteen, you know that.”

“Hunk?”

“17.”

“Back on earth, none of us would be considered an adult. We wouldn’t be allowed to go through the airport alone. We wouldn’t be allowed to buy alcohol. We wouldn’t be allowed to have an input in our government. We would be children.

“Here, on this ship, far away from our planet. We are war heros. We live in a castle that doubles as a spaceship, or a spaceship that doubles as a castle, and we are Paladins. We fight in battles on a larger scale than any one of our ancestors have ever fought in. We are soldiers.”

Lance could feel the tears streaming down his face. “More importantly though, we are children.”

Lance stalked out of the room.

Keith followed. Even when he’d caught up, Lance didn’t slow down. He was sobbing now. Just like he had each night when they ended their calls. This time, however, Keith was there. This time he could intertwine their fingers. “Lance.”

When they finally arrived at Lance's bedroom, hospital room, whichever you prefer it’s all the same to him,they both sat up on the bed. Keith held Lance as he cried. He cried and cried and cried and cried. They didn’t know how long they’d been there, but it didn’t truly matter. What did matter was that they were together. Between the sobs Keith could hear Lance mumble something just clearly enough to respond.

“I love you too.”

Lance looked up, those deep blue eyes so sad and so afraid, yet so full of hope. He looked intensely at Keith. “We are just children, I did mean what I said back there. We could die at any moment. I don’t want to let that stop us anymore.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I love you Keith, and I don't want to live my life in fear of losing you. I want to use the time we have. This war would last the rest of our lives, whether they end early or decades from now. Why should we waste it?”

Keith had never thought of it that way. He had let the thought of losing Lance consume him so deeply that he’d never thought of how it might feel to have him fully. “You’re right.”

“I want to be with you. At this point I think it’s hurting us more to stay apart than it would to be together. Well I guess it’s hurting me, I can't really speak for you – Wait what did you say?”

“I said you’re right. We should take advantage of the time we have.”

Lance was speechless.

“If you leave your mouth open any longer you might catch flies. I told you you were right, don’t get used to it.”

Lance had been a man of words all night. He was sick of it. He grabbed onto Keith’s jawline and pulled his lips toward his own. He was so warm, like fire against his skin as they kissed. They’d been playing this game for so long. The kiss was the greatest thing Lance had ever experienced, or at least it felt like it in that moment. They kissed for a long time. Longer than they should.

It was Keith that finally broke the kiss. He only broke away for a moment, before burying his face in Lance’s shoulder.

“We have to talk about it, you know.”

“Not now. You make me so happy. I just want to be happy right now. It’s been so long since I've been happy.”

“That’s okay. You’re allowed to be happy. That’s our mission from now on. Happiness.”

They spent the night in Lance's room. They took their last opportunity to relax. After everything that has happened, not only over the course of the last few hours, but over the course of the last few days, weeks, months. They deserve peace, even if only for a moment.

The next morning they walked out to breakfast hand in hand. They had a calm conversation with their team. With their family. They spoke about how they felt so alone. They spoke about how they’ve spent so long being too afraid of death to love each other. They spoke about how they are so scared all the time, but never scared for themselves. They would all die for the cause at a moment’s notice, but they still feared the death of their friends and family.

Everyone shared how they felt, not only Lance and Keith. Pidge shared how scared she was. She was so young. Hunk shared how he felt so guilty for being the cowardly one, and wishes he could be brave like the rest of the Paladins. Allura tells them how she believes that she is only a Paladin because of her father, as though it was some sort of obligation. Shiro expressed that he was so afraid he wasn’t qualified to be the leather of a universal revolution. Coran worries he isn’t useful.

They all feel so alone. So isolated that they couldn’t find comfort in their own family.

They came to an understanding. Allura and Shiro, and Coran realized they were wrong for putting so much pressure on a bunch of teenagers that didn’t know what they were getting into. Keith, Lance, Hunk, and Pidge all realized that they didn’t have to pretend to be braver than they were.

Especially because they were the bravest in the universe.

Even war heroes are allowed to have a weakness.

Especially if they’re children.

#fanfiction #fanfic #angst #fluff #voltron #unresolved emotional tension #pining lance #lance is a mess #insecure lance #galra keith #keith is bad at feelings #keith is a mess #blade of marmora keith #blade of marmora #naxzela #pining keith #keith x lance #voltron: legendary defender

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seraphimfawn-fallen · 10 months

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Helping Love | Klance Omegaverse (on Wattpad) A/N: Warnings are given, there is Angst (I'm very sorry) and new Klance Idea. Mpreg. Spelling mistakes. ➪ Lance McClain has secrets. Lance McClain has a past. Lance McClain has a crush. and Lance McClain is a paladin of Voltron. Due to his past he's jumpy, flinches that he tries to hide, has secrets that he rather keeps that way, a crush on the red paladin and insecurities and anxiety and being an Omega on top of that just really makes him more anxious if anyone found out. Honestly he's more scared of people finding out things he's tried hard to hide then dying on the battlefield in a war, so what happens when his past catches up a frightening rate? what happens when secrets that have been so hard to keep come out? what happens when a crush he was to afraid to admit comes into play? No one knows and only Voltron and Lance could possibly be the answer. Maybe even Love helps. ➪ Started: 2/10/23 Finished:

#abuse #alphakeith #alteanlance #betaallura #betacoran #betahunk #bottomlance #galralance #humanlance #klance #mpreg #omegalance #omegaverse #topkeith #voltron #books #wattpad #amwriting

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ao3-feedshance · 1 year

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Night City

by schoolboysel

Lance Mcclain, "Runner" is an orphan street kid who grew up to become a freelancer hitman in the cyberpunk world where no one gives mercy. Lance finds his way to a job against the most powerful families in Night City; "The Shiroganes" and "The Koganes." What could his mission be? Who will he meet on his journey? What happened in the past?

Dive into this adventurous and mysterious story~ ai ai I promise you'll get hooked if you love Voltron characters, futuristic scenes, action, or cyberpunk! (CYBERPUNK AU)

Words: 97, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Voltron: Legendary Defender, Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con

Categories: M/M, Multi, Other

Relationships: Keith/Lance (Voltron), Lance/Shiro (Voltron), Keith & Lance (Voltron), Lance & Shiro (Voltron), Voltron Paladins & Voltron: Legendary Defender Team, Hunk & Lance (Voltron), Hunk & Keith & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt, Allura & Coran & Hunk & Keith & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt & Shiro, Keith/Lance/Shiro (Voltron)

Additional Tags: Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Hunk & Lance (Voltron) Friendship, Insecure Lance (Voltron), Trans Lance (Voltron), Trans Male Lance (Voltron), Hitman Lance (Voltron), Alternate Universe - Cyberpunk, Cyberpunk, Inspired by Cyberpunk 2077, Pining Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Street Kid V (Cyberpunk 2077), Top Keith (Voltron), Top Shiro (Voltron), Switch Lance (Voltron), Protective Shiro (Voltron), Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Gay Shiro (Voltron), POV Third Person, POV Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Explicit Sexual Content, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Mental Breakdown, Blood and Violence, Heavy BDSM, BDSM, Adult Content

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/46658941

#IFTTT #Shance #Shiro #Lance #VLD #Voltron #Ao3 #ao3feed #fic #fanfic

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lesbianklance · 3 years

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i will never get over how all the paladins were told such great things about their skills and personalities in that ep with the old paladins and alfor was like "your only purpose is to date my daughter i approve lmao"

like lance was constantly shown doubting his abilities and place at the team. what alfor told him basically confirmed it.

he deserved more than anyone to be told what a great paladin and person he is and once again he was stuck haviny his self worth based on another person (like at the garrison with keith)

#vld #vld lance #lance mcclain #lance deserves so much better than s8 tbu #tbh*#and in the end he ends as a farmer #ffs what's the point of creating a character with insecurities if in the end youre gonna say ya he's right lmao #he should have overcome them and become confident in himself #only person who ever told him he was wrong was keith #everyone else just made it worse #and im so fucking mad at that #alfor could have given his blessing after telling lance what a great person and paladin he is #tell him about his strengths and then say youre a great man and i approve of you for my daughter #and thats it #instead all his speech was about allura and his only purpose being being her bf #id say the exact words but i dont remembwr #but it was smth like were defined by the women we love smth like that #like bitch no lance is more than just alluras bf #rant

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gesu-ko · 6 years

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So I watched To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

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mustlovelance · 6 years

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lance mcclain: hey, listen, you’re a fucking catch lance serrano: i’m a what lance mcclain: my work here is done lance serrano: but you didn’t do anything lance mcclain: -gone-

#lance mcclain later boasts to his team that he cured his other self's stupid insecurity isn't he AMAZING

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autisticlancemcclain · 2 years

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Dude I’m pleading with you for a black paladin lance fic

sorry this took me a hundred years 💀💀

Chocolate Chip Chivalry

Keith & Lance (Voltron), Black Paladin Lance, 1.5k Words

Summary: Keith is struggling with Shiro’s disappearance and his own inability to be what he thought Shiro wanted. Lance, it turns out, is a big help.

———

“Alright, buddy, up you get.”

Keith doesn’t move except to roll his sore eyes. If Lance thinks he’s gonna get Keith up for anything other than a mission, he’s got another thing coming.

“I will lift you out of that bed, Kogane, do not test me.”

This gives Keith pause. Because while Lance is kind of scrawny, he has this weird ability to do things that seem out of the physical realm of possibility for him when he’s feeling stubborn. A month ago, for example, he suddenly sprouted the ability to hear a whispered conversation several miles away, because he wanted to go home and finish a project of his. Truly remarkable.

So, yeah. Keith might be bigger than Lance, but he also knows from experience that if Lance says he will bodily lift Keith out of bed, then he damn well means it, and Keith would like to hold on to what’s left of his dignity, thanks.

“What the fuck do you want,” Keith growls, sitting up and glaring at the Cuban.

Lance raises an eyebrow back, completely unfazed. “I want you to get out of bed. You’ve been locked in here for three days, and it’s making you feel worse, not better.”

“I think I’m entitled to some fucking self-pity, Lance.”

“I never said you weren’t. I’m just saying that the rest of us have been crying with company, and it feels marginally less shitty than sobbing in your room alone.”

Keith really looks at Lance for the first time since he barged in, noticing the red-rimmed eyes and dried tear tracks. He starts to feel guilty. He’s been spending who knows how long holed up in his room, throwing himself a pity party, as if he’s the only one who lost Shiro. God, no wonder the Black Lion chose Lance instead of him, he’d be a shit leader, he can only think of himself he’s such a fucking douche, he’s a fucking waste of space —

“Cut that out,” Lance orders, narrowing his eyes at Keith. “No one’s mad at you. No one’s disappointed. We completely understand why you’re camped in here, and we get it. I get it. I just also know that it’s unhealthy, and I want you to do something to take your mind off of it.”

Keith is quiet for a moment, looking down at his fists, clenched in his sheets. He doesn’t really want to get out of bed. All he really wants to do is sleep or cry some more, and every time he thinks of his brother his eyes tear up on their own.

But some training probably wouldn’t hurt. The endorphins will probably be good for him, honestly.

“I guess I could train,” Keith mutters sullenly.

“Um, no. You will not be doing that. That’s going to make it worse, because you’re gonna —”

“So what the fuck am I meant to do, then, huh, Lance?” Keith demands. “Just fucking sit around and get more weak and useless? Maybe I can fucking summon Shiro with my mind, and then I’ll have a purpose again! Shiro asked me to do one fucking thing, just one, and I couldn’t even —” Keith breaks down into tears, again, shoulders shaking with the force of his sobs.

Fuck.

He feels the mattress dip to his left, seeing Lance kneeling next to him out of the corner of his eyes. The next thing he feels is Lance’s arm over his shoulders, pulling him into a tight hug. Keith cries into Lance’s neck, soaking his shirt and skin, for what feels like hours. Lance doesn’t complain or move, only running a gentle hand down his back and making occasional humming noises.

Eventually Keith cries himself out, tears dried, leaving only those horrible stuttering breaths that are the aftermath of a period of misery. Lance pulls away a little, moving his hands so his palms are pressing on either side of Keith’s face. His hands are blessedly cool on Keith’s overheated skin.

“Shiro is not disappointed in you,” he says firmly. “Wherever he is, and whatever he’s doing, he’s proud of you. He always is.”

“But I’m a fucking failure,” Keith argues, feeling his eyes burn again. “He asked me to pilot Black, and she wouldn’t open for me. She opened for you, which makes sense, but I still feel like a let-down.”

Something unreadable flashes through Lance’s dark eyes, and then a look of determination settles in his features. He grips Keith’s hands and pulls him off the bed, making Keith stumble a little. It’s been a hot minute since he’s really moved a lot.

“Okay, change of plans,” Lance announces. “To the kitchens.”

Lance marches them down the hall, turning into the big double doors that lead to the dining area. He drags Keith all the way to the massive, industrial Altean kitchen, depositing him by the counter beside the stove, and walks to the fridge.

“Okay, we need butter, and eggs…” he trails off as he rummages through the fridge’s contents, occasionally moving to set down a few ingredients or equipment beside Keith. Keith watches him in confusion.

“What the hell are you doing?” he asks.

“Start sifting two cups of flour into the pink bowl,” Lance says instead of answering.

Keith thinks about refusing, but he honestly doesn’t have the energy. He settles for rolling his eyes and muttering petulantly as he complies.

Lance continues to call out instructions as he buzzes around the kitchen, messing with the oven settings and God knows what else. Keith continues to follow the instructions, getting into a sort of rhythm of whipping or sifting or mixing or measuring.

Eventually, Keith fully clues into what he’s been doing for the past half hour and realises he’s successfully made a batch of space chocolate chip cookie dough.

“Okay, now scoop a bunch of that onto this cookie sheet. About twelve balls, evenly spaced, a little more than a tablespoon of dough on each spot.”

Keith hesitates a moment, because he realises he hasn’t really registered jack shit since Lance made him start on this. Not Lance’s idle chatter, not the fact that he literally made cookie dough, and, most importantly, not the overwhelming sadness and desperation he’s been feeling nonstop for the past three days.

But he continues on, scooping the dough onto the baking sheet, and then he sits up on the counter and watches as Lance slides them into the hot oven and sets a ten minute timer.

“Why did we… why did you make me do that?” Keith asks after a period of silence. He’s surprised at his own tone — only honest curiosity, not an ounce of hostility or anger. Huh.

“You needed to do something creative and tedious,” Lance responds simply. “Not to psychoanalyse you or anything, but you were very clearly going through a depressive episode, and that kind of thing helps.”

“Oh.”

They sit in quiet, contemplative silence until the timer goes off. Lance hops off the counter and puts on an oven mitt, grinning a little as he takes the cookies out. Keith gets it. They look perfect, and certainly smell amazing.

Lance expertly lifts each cookie from the parchment paper onto a cooling rack with a spatula, except for three of them, which he puts on a plate and slides towards Keith.

“There’s milk in the fridge,” he informs him. Keith nods, heading over to pour two glasses. He carries them back over to the counter, where Lance is waiting.

They both grab a cookie, biting them at the same time. Keith feels his eyebrows raise. These cookies are delicious, and usually Keith kind of sucks in the kitchen.

“There are really good,” Keith says.

“You did a good job,” Lance agrees.

Keith makes a face, looking at Lance strangely. “I didn’t make them.”

Lance raises his eyebrows, looking amused, but Keith recognizes the knowing glint in his eyes. There’s something else at play here.

“I didn’t do shit. You put all the ingredients together. You measured them, mixed them, scooped them. All you, buddy. I talked the whole time.”

“No, you — wait,” Keith pauses for a minute, cookie halfway to his mouth (they really are amazing), thinking back to the past forty-odd minutes.

“Huh,” he says after a moment. He really did make these cookies.

“You made these cookies,” Lance reiterates.

Keith looks at him suspiciously. “Why are you putting so much emphasis on that?”

Lance shrugs, but his knowing grin from earlier has only gotten bigger.

“You said you were useless, earlier. That you didn’t make a difference. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think a useless person couldn’t make these bomb-ass cookies, and they certainly made a difference in my day, so.”

Lance lets that sit between them, as Keith processes.

Well, damn.

“…Point taken,” Keith says eventually.

Lance smiles at him, big and bright, and nudges his shoulder.

“I know losing Shiro has sucked,” he says softly. “I can’t even conceptualize your pain — I don’t know what I’d do if I lost one of my siblings not once, but twice. I’m sorry, Keith. I’m so sorry. And I’m sorry that Shiro’s expectations weren’t right for you. But I promise you that we will find Shiro, whatever it takes, and I will do everything in my power to be the best leader I can be in the meantime.”

Keith smiles back, a little watery, a little emotional, but happier nonetheless. He reaches over to grab Lance’s hand, squeezing tightly.

“You’re already are, Lance. You already are.”

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fenfyre · 7 years

Text

Be My Eyes - Part III

Part I Part II

This time around the wait was almost unbearable. Mostly because Shiro didn’t want to admit to himself that he was waiting at all. But their second conversation had given him even more hope and the things he’d gotten to know about Lance, that he was great with children, was dedicated and hard-working and compassionate, made Shiro’s useless crush even worse. A few times he toyed with the idea to go out and find someone to hook up with just to get that pretty smile out of his head. But he’d never liked one-night-stands and besides, after the accident it had gotten much harder to pick someone up. Most people out for a quick fuck were deterred by the prosthetic. Not that Shiro cared too much. It had taken him years to pull himself together and get back on his feet, switch professions, become at peace with himself again. There hadn’t been much place for a relationship during that time, as focused on himself as he was, as he had to be. He’d always be grateful for the role Allura had played in his recovery and always regret that he hadn’t been able to offer her anything but his friendship in return. It was too late for them now, she’d found love with someone else and he was happy for them, no matter the bittersweet could-have-beens floating through his mind sometimes. But now that he was recovered and had reclaimed his life, found a job he enjoyed and friends he liked spending time with, it felt like he was ready for love as well. If only his best shot at it wasn’t an elusive, beautiful man he had no chance of contacting on his own. It was late evening when his phone rang and Shiro dried his hand on a kitchen towel before tapping the notification. The last few calls had left him numb, the hope he’d only just found fading more and more every time it wasn’t Lance’s face smiling at him from his screen and even though Shiro felt his heartbeat pick up yet again he tried to shoo away the tiny flame of hope before it was snuffed out by reality. Instead of a wide smile the screen turned black and for a moment Shiro wondered if his phone had died. But then he heard soft breathing before a familiar voice spoke up. “Hey, I’m Lance. Thanks for...” “Hey”, Shiro breathed back, having to lean against the counter to support his suddenly weakened legs. What were the chances? “Nice to talk to you again.” There was a soft gasp and a rustling sound of fabric, maybe clothes or bedsheets and then Lance laughed, a sound that made Shiro’s heart clench with sweet longing. “Shiro! Oh wow, I was wondering if I’d uh … meet you again.” Shiro bit his lip against a happy noise. Lance had thought about him, about talking to him again. But there was something he was wondering about. “Is your camera broken? I can’t see anything...” “Oh, yeah!” Lance let out another laugh. “That’s why I called, I couldn’t remember if I turned off the light after my sister left and … I was too lazy to get back up and check the switch so … guess I know now, huh?” So he was in bed already and just didn’t want to get up again. The thought made Shiro smile, even though his stomach clenched nervously when he realized they’d hang up again very soon. He wouldn’t be able to stand another month or two of waiting for the next call, he had to do something, say something but before he could even open his mouth Lance was speaking again. “But honestly, how weird is it that I talked to you three times now? That never happened to me before! You might as well just give your number at this point!” The words were accompanied by another carefree laugh, Lance was obviously joking. But it was also the perfect pass and Shiro would hate himself if he didn’t at least try. It helped that he had literally nothing to lose. “Would that be … very weird? If I … gave you my number?” As soon as Shiro had said it he crumbled, hiding his face behind his hand. He’d been so smooth once. Years ago. Obviously that was not like riding a bike. “What?”, came Lance small, wondrous reply and he sounded so cute Shiro almost whimpered. Well, he’d started this, now he had to finish it. “You, uhm … you just seem like a … really great and, and interesting person. To be honest I … I was hoping we could talk again and I’d uh, I’d love to get to know you better. If you want.” There was a stretch of silence that seemed to last forever, broken only by Lance’s breathing and the occasional rustling sound of the sheets. “Get to know me in like … a gay way?” Lance finally asked and there was a hint of humour in his voice that Shiro just couldn’t place. He knew there was a big chance Lance wasn’t even interested in men and that he might just have made a huge fool of himself. But it had still been worth a shot. Was still worth a shot. “If that’s”, he began, licking his dry lips. “If that’s what you want...” Another stretch of silence, this one so long and unbearable Shiro let himself sink down along the counter and onto the floor, pulling both knees to his chest. Not like riding a bike at all. He felt and acted like a fumbling teenager all over again. Maybe that’s what years of only partly voluntary abstinence did to a person. Finally Lance talked again and when he did it was with a cheeky, flirty tone that made Shiro even more jittery. “Shiro, can I tell you something?” He didn’t have the energy for more than a weak “Hm?” but it was enough. “I’ve been using this app five times as much as I usually do ever since I talked to you for the first time. Every time I was hoping they’d connect me to you again. So can you please just give me your number?” Shiro didn’t compute for a long moment. He just sat there on his kitchen floor, face in his hand, breathing. Then a laugh bubbled up from his chest and he just let it spill over, laughing freely until Lance joined him, the melodious sound of his laughter music to Shiro’s ear. He grinned all the way through giving Lance his number. “Alright”, Lance smiled after he’d finished. “I’ll call you back in a minute, yeah? Then you can tell me all about how you’re not a 50-something year old pervert so my sister can sleep again at night.” Did … did that mean Lance had talked to his sister about Shiro? That was … adorable. “Sure, I’ll be waiting.” And wait Shiro did after they hung up, seconds ticking into minutes until his anxiety flared up again and he scrambled to his feet, starting to pace through the kitchen. Had he given Lance the right number? Why hadn’t he asked for a number in turn? What if Lance was just trying to get rid of him and didn’t even intend to call? What if Shiro had creeped him out and he’d uninstall the app and they’d never speak again? By the time his ringtone echoed through the kitchen Shiro had all but convinced himself Lance hated him. So he answered the call from an unknown number with shaking fingers. “Hey, I’m Lance”, came the casual drawl that made Shiro melt from the inside out, knees getting weak again. “Thanks for picking up. I’ll only need you for … hm, the rest of the night?” Shiro grinned, bit his lip, nodded slowly as that crushing weight of his doubts was lifted from his shoulders. “Sounds perfect.”

The End

[This story is a commission! If you enjoyed it consider buying me a coffee or check out how to commission me!]

#Shance #Takashi Shirogane #Lance McClain #Lance #vld #commission #be my eyes #blind!Lance #blind character #au #goodbye my sweet children #i'll come back to you one day #to explore shiro's past and his insecurities #while lance becomes a relentless force of positivity in his life #these guys istg

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