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stellamancer · 2 months

Text

heel (gojo x reader???)

notes: um. idk what i should say. though i am not hating on feet people!! i am feet people!! if you want a non foot version of this feel free to read my other fic empty threat: also post spar with gojo shenanigans (even reused a line to connect the two lmao). part of the infinite loop! fic verse.

ageless blogs and minors do not interact

contains: gn!reader (no gendered language is used) gojo, feet (or what i like to call the steppy)??, dubcon?? (just in case), sexual implications, the use of the words dick and cock, no this isn't smut

wc: 812

You wish you knew how you ended up in this situation.

It all started with you agreeing to spar with Gojo and thinking back now, that was your first mistake. Training with him has been odd lately, though you can’t quite put your finger on why, but one minute the two of you were engaged in hand to hand combat and now he’s laying on the floor with your foot pressed firmly against his crotch.

You don't even know how it got there in the first place.

“Well?” he drawls, that stupid amused tone of his grating on your nerves as he waits for your next move.

Idly, you think it’d be nice if you could end his family line here and now by stomping down hard enough but you know that that’s just wishful thinking on your part.

Should you just back off then? Fight’s over; you’ve won, but only because Gojo let you. Honestly speaking, that fact burns you, keeps your foot in place despite your attempts to rationalize it with the notion that a win’s a win. If he were a curse, you wouldn’t care about it being an easy win.

But he’s not; he’s Satoru Gojo and there’s something off about all this.

“Enjoying the view?” Gojo asks, yanking you from your thoughts. You stare down at him, scowling, but he remains unfazed as usual. “Not that I can blame you since—”

Your body reacts instantly in annoyance, your foot jerking down, digging into his dick and, for a split second, you think that it’s the surprise of it that causes him to cut off mid-sentence.

Except for the fact that he moans.

He fucking moans.

You’ve always thought, always known that Satoru Gojo is an absolute freak but you’d never really given much thought to it.

If you could, you’d keep it that way— the last thing you want is to be giving him more mental real estate than he deserves.

This is way too much for you right now.

“Ah, so you’re into that, are you?” Gojo’s voice sounds way too entertained, way too pleased for someone who just had someone grind their heel into his crotch. “Somehow, I’m not surprised.”

Instinct bids you to crush his cock beneath your foot because normally guys find that to be pretty painful, but you have to remind yourself that Gojo is far from normal. He might actually be into it. So instead, you try to pull your foot away, to get away from him as fast as possible, but try as you might, your foot doesn’t move, as if it’s being held in place by some invisible force.

You’re mildly horrified when you realize that it is and this, you think, has the be the most disturbing use of the Limitless technique in all of history. The realization causes your self-control to slip and your foot presses even harder against him.

Gojo moans again, louder this time and you can’t ignore the slight pressure of what you fear to be a growing boner pushing against the sole of your shoe.

Nor can you ignore the electric prickle running up and down the length of your spine. What the heck? When it starts to settle in the pit of your stomach you realize what it is.

You need to get away from Gojo.

Now.

You yank your foot away from him and luckily, luckily, he releases his technique and you’re free of him. Like a frightened creature, you back away and refuse to look Gojo in the eye.

“...get up,” you say after a second of absolute silence. You hear the ruffle of clothes as he rises to his feet and slowly, carefully, you peer at him from the corner of your eye. “Don’t do that again.”

Gojo’s expression is unreadable. Figures. But who knows, maybe, for once in his life, he’ll actually listen.

Unfortunately, your hopes are dashed the moment he opens his mouth. “Why? You looked like you were enjoying yourself.”

You are horrified. What kind of face were you making? There’s no way. He has to be lying, saying what he wants for the sake of his own entertainment. You couldn't have been into it! You were mortified, horrified by all of it, but yet you still managed get tu—

Before that last thought can fully form itself in your mind you shake your head violently as if that will rid you of it.

Gojo laughs lighthearted and amused as always, “Okay, okay, if you say so.”

He doesn’t believe you, but he’s always been delusional. You glare at Gojo but he ignores it, and stretches.

“Let me know if you change your mind though,” he says casually. “I think it could be fun.”

“Yeah right,” you huff, ignoring how he laughs, ignoring how the tiniest voice in the back of your mind thinks that maybe, just maybe he’s got a point.

Satoru Gojo’s definitely a freak, but maybe you are too.

is gojo actually into getting his dick stepped on or was he just fucking around and you were just finding out? you decide.

#gojo x reader #satoru gojo x reader #jjk x reader #gojo x you #satoru gojo x you #nsft #tw feet #cw feet #infinite loop!verse

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sugoi-writes · 10 months

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Hello! Can I request a Tanjiro's smut? (dom reader)

It's okay if you don't want to as I see a lot of writer considered his age...

Thank you!😘

I gave it some thought, and I'll be doing this.... as a 2 parter! Because I've been having fun with longer works. We're gonna lead slowly into the smut, but I promise it's there/coming. (Heh)

Keep in mind, Tanjiro is aged up and a Hashira, and this fic is spoiler-free for the most part. Featuring a Kakushi, F!Reader. No real trigger warnings other than you recovered from a bad injury, your relationship is low-key, and there's some nudity. Enjoy!

💗💗💗

A faint knock comes to the door, making you lift your head.

"Come in!," you proclaim, before the door slides open. Through this, Kamado Tanjiro is revealed to you, carrying a small bundle of wildflowers with him.

You feel your heart swell, as you instantly reach out to to him, anticipating his embrace. Tanjiro is quick to come to you, kissing your cheek as he wraps his free arm around you.

"Ready to be discharged?," he asks, before you shake your head.

"Not quite. Aoi is gathering some medicine together for me to take. As long as I talk it diligently for the next few days, I should be a-okay."

Tanjiro sighs, looking relieved," It's strange to be on the other side of things... especially with a Kakushi getting hurt in my sted."

You laugh, lifting your shirt slightly to reveal the fully closed wound across your abdomen," Right? It's weird for me too... but at least I'm cleared for home rest, for now. And, no more infection to worry about!"

Tanjiro sets your bouquet aside for a moment, his hand tracing over the scar that was soon to form," I know... I'm glad that things are finally looking up again."

You lean up and kiss his cheek, chuckling," I just know that you worried yourself far too much... but, hopefully a day together can put your mind at ease."

Tanjiro presses his forehead against yours, lightly 'head butting' you playfully," It would... it will, I should say. And I'm going to carry you all the way home." You feel your face heat up, childishly shoving him away.

"N-No way!!! Tanjiro, I can walk on my own--!!"

The door opens suddenly, making the two of you jump and seperate quickly. Aoi, not looking to either of you, seems to be juggling multiple things," Sorry for the intrusion: I finally have your medicine!"

You huff, relief flooding your body. The sooner you were out of there, the sooner you could make up for lost time. Tanjiro listens to Aoi's warnings and recommendations, just in case, as she talks away. He knows you tend to zone out when someone is scolding/talking at you like this.

He can't help but want to reach over and hold your hand, but he buried the thought, considering your feelings before outing your sneaky relationship.

When Aoi bids the two of you good day, Tanjiro looks back to you gleefully, offering a hand. You take it gingerly, and for the first time in weeks, you manage to get to your feet without much difficulty.

"Let's go, then!" You chime, tugging Tanjiro along as you make your way out from the Butterfly Estate. You smile and bid all of the ladies and girls of the estate well, as they and others wish for your health and prosperity. Again, Tanjiro can't help the look he gives you, one that's so full of love and longing, that he wishes he could just kiss you now. A few of the older girls happen to notice this, gossiping behind cupped hands. But for now, Tanjiro could always wait a little longer...

As the two of you start making the familiar trek to your estate, Tanjiro grins, looking around for any on lookers.

"Okay, it seems the coast is clear.... SO THEN--!!"

You yelp in surprise when Tanjiro scoops you up, before breaking into a light jog. You flail as your arms instinctively loop around his neck,"T-Tanjiro!!! I told you I could walk just fine!"

Your partner just smiles mischievously at you, a glint in his eye," I know... but I have plans for us today! I don't want to waste a single moment!"

You groan, your defeat holding your embarrassment at bay," You're lucky you're so cute when you get like this...," you grumble, leaning your head against him as his pace increases.

---

You feel your eyes open when you're set down, grogginess overwhelming you.

"I didn't think I was THAT comfy~" Tanjiro teases, ruffling your hair as you groan.

"D-Did I really fall asleep...? Ahh, sorry... the medicine must've worn me out..."

Tanjiro comes to sit beside you on your bed, a hand coming to rest on your thigh," I was thinking... You'd probably want a warm bath, to celebrate being home, right?," Tanjiro offers, making you hum.

"Yeah... a bath sounds nice, actually," you practically coo, stretching as Tanjiro stands.

"Just wait right there, then, and I'll get it going for you--," you tug on the sleeve of his haori suddenly, your face feeling hot.

"A-Actually... if you're going through the trouble, and you're all hot and sweaty too... would you want to join me?"

Tanjiro's eyes widen for a moment, before his face blooms a deep red," W-Well... I don't think that that'd be a very-- uhh-- productive bath..."

And then there were the puppy dog eyes: the eyes that killed Tanjiro every time.

He rolls his eyes, going to ruffle your hair again as he turns to walk away" But I guess we could make that happen. Today is all about you, and what you'd want to do today." You blink, a little surprised. You didn't think he'd finally agree to something like this so easily... maybe you should ask more?

"O-oh... y-yeah, I-- thanks, Tanjiro," you stammer, a grin slowly growing," I-I'll come join once you're ready... okay?"

Tanjiro nods, methodically performing the routine of running your bath, just how you liked it. While he's out of the room, you opt to change out of your hospital attire, finding a comfortable lounge robe. You swallowed your nervous feeling welling up in your throat, as you decided to omit your undergarments. Though this had been far from the first time he's seen you like this... something about this just felt especially intimate to you. That, or you were utterly touch starved by this point. Who could really say?

When Tanjiro calls for you, you make your way to the washroom, to the tub that awaited you. Hot steam exited the room, as Tanjiro was removing his blouse.

He looks to you, face hot as he eyes your robe," S-So, you're already ready, then..." You nod, attempting to be boldn in place of meek," Did you really want to undress me that badly, Kamado?"

Tanjiro could only flush harder, removing the rest of his clothing," And is it a bad thing if I did?" You snort, going to cover your mouth. You read him like a book.

You open your arms out to him, allowing him to walk over and undo your robe fastenings, before he tenderly slides your garment off of you. As he took in the sight of your recent injuries, and your body overall, he's blissfully happy. He's eternally grateful that you were still here, and that you weren't harmed anymore than you were. His hands brushed across your lower back so gently, it was as if he were scared to break you.

"So... anything on your mind?," you prod, leaning against Tanjiro's chest. You loosely wrap your arms around his neck, keeping him close.

He smiles, kissing your cheek as he embraces you back," Just about how beautiful you are, love... but, we should probably go and enjoy the water before it gets cold."

You hum, nodding as he leads you over and helps you in first. For a moment, you both fumble as you try to figure out where Tanjiro should be, before he opts to sit behind you.

You lean back into your lover once he's settled, sighing contently. Tanjiro can't help but mirror your sigh as a powerful but gentle arm hugs you close, squeezing lightly. He inhales, smiling as he fondly recalls your scent," I missed you so much, Y/N..."

You chuckle, looking back to kiss him on his jaw," I missed you too, Tanjiro... but, at least we're together like this versus in a stiff hospital room..." Tanjiro nuzzles into you, breathing you in again.

"Mm-hmm... 'glad to be back at your home, for now."

For a moment, the two of you stay this way, before you feel familiar hands explore your body," Did you want me to wash your back for you?"

You chuckle, knowing it was a very obvious attempt to touch you more intimately. You grind ever so slightly on him, as you look back to him, trying to act coy. You sit forward a bit, biting your lip as you hear him gasp.

"Go right ahead, pretty boy."

You could feel his restraint swaying, as a trembling hand reaches for a washcloth and soap. You couldn't even scold him when the cold soap touches your back; his hands radiated a heat that you were all-too familiar with.

You looked straight ahead, pretending that this had no affect on the current situation. You feel that your attempts are working, as Tanjiro's free hand gently holds your hip, keeping you in place.

"I think you missed a spot, dear..." You muse suddenly. He doesn's get a chance to speak before you're pushing your rump back against him, arching your back," A little lower, I think~?"

Tanjiro was throbbing from your teasing, biting his lip as the cloth ventured lower," R-Right, of course..." You almost felt the need to pout as he held himself back, wanting to wait and not rush into things. Partially, you figure, because you're not fully recovered yet.

The tension was enough to make you squeeze your legs together,"Baby...," you command softly, your voice lowering. Tanjiro's throat runs dry, his hand ceasing its circular path.

"Y-Yes...?"

You glance back, your eyelids lowered," Did you really miss me...? As much as you said?"

Tanjiro almost looks panicked as he nods," O-Of course! Every day, my love... I couldn't wait to see you--"

"Did you want hold me close?" Tanjiro's lip quivered as your voice seemed to drip with desire " Y-Yes..."

You swivel around a bit, your breasts coming into view as you brushed up against his manhood again," And...did you miss fucking me?"

Between the alluring angle, and the way your voice melded into his mind, he was absolutely melting. Tanjiro's face went through multiple stages of embarrassment and desire, but he ultimately nodded, casting your washcloth aside. You yelp in surprise when he grabs you by your waist, pulling you flush against him. Your breath hitches when familiar, gentle lips kiss at the crook of your neck.

"Without a doubt, Y/N. I want you... even now. Especially now."

You smile, pulling away from him before leaning over the edge of the tub. You can hear his breath becoming more labored as your wet slit was basically eye level with his face," Show me, then... won't you, Kamado?"

Tanjiro's breath ghosted across your bare sex as he leans forward, both hands coming up to knead the flesh of your ass.

"I plan to: full heartedly~"

#demon slayer smut #tanjiro kamado x reader #tanjiro kamado x y/n #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kny smut #f!reader #tanjiro kamado fanfic #demon slayer tanjiro #kimetsu no yaiba tanjiro #bfhdjjssn sorry there wasn't a LOT of smut in this but the 2nd half is going to be FULL TILT smut with plenty of dom reader #just wanted to give you a little bit now since im taking forever to write lol #requests

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thevioletcaptain · 1 year

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So I was just sitting here head empty no thoughts while sketching art for Pinefest and listening to music, which meant that naturally all of the potential DeanCas thoughts floating around in the ether were like "that's free real estate!" and started clambering around in my brain.

And... now I think I've just managed to summarize my current main read of how and why late seasons Dean and Cas are so goddamn ridiculous about each other while being VERY MUTUALLY IN LOVE yet also both convinced that it's unrequited.

Had to note it all down before it disappeared, and it's not like groundbreaking stuff tbh, but I think this is the first time I've managed to put my thoughts about Their Whole Deal into coherent words. So. Here it is:

Dean knows he's in love with Cas and wants him in every way he can have him, BUT:

Dean also "knows" that can never be, because he "knows" that Cas isn't into men.

The reason Dean "knows" this is because if Cas was into men, then he'd obviously be into Dean.

This isn't Dean being vain!

It's just that Dean knows that Cas cares about him more than he cares about literally anyone else, because there's only so many times a guy can give Heaven the middle finger and die on your behalf before that becomes painfully clear.

But seeing as Cas has clearly placed Dean at the very top of his Important People Hierarchy but has not made any moves to show that he's interested in anything beyond friendship (because Dean has been looking! and he would definitely notice!) then Cas simply must be whatever passes for heterosexual for a cosmic beam of light stuffed down into the body of a 40-something suburban dad.

He did marry that Daphne woman after all, and he tried to go on a date with his boss Nora from the Gas 'N Sip, and that one time when Dean paid him a compliment when Cas was visiting him in his bedroom he immediately told Dean that he had "a female waiting in the car" and bailed, which is a pretty big and obvious stop light as far as Dean's concerned.

So Dean is just like, "Oh well, I guess I'd better make it obvious that I'm happy being bros so that Cas doesn't feel bad about it or think I'm being clingy and weird."

And he throws as many brothers and buddys into conversation as he possibly can.

Which Cas hears & is like, "Ah yes, this confirms my suspicion that despite longing for me constantly, Dean only loves & longs for me in a platonic and brotherly fashion, woe is me."

Or alternately, "Ah yes, this confirms my suspicion that despite loving me back and desiring me carnally as I desire him, Dean is uncomfortable with these feelings and does not wish to pursue them, woe is me."

So basically that's how we get both of them thinking they're being respectful of the other's "platonic" feelings while actually just emotionally destroying each other constantly.

And that's what you missed on Glee!

#90% of the time this is the way i write them #being utter fools about each other #the deancas of it all #fandom: supernatural #casually resurrecting a years old meme at the end there because it's my post and i do what i want

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blackkatmagic · 1 year

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Your writing and Bright Hearts in particular are giving me a lot of feels regarding the Force/the Daughter going 'it's free real estate' at every unburnt Jedi body. Sometimes you just have to help the scales tip back into balance with a bit of light necromancy. Although now I'm wondering if there's ever been cases before of Jedi keeling over from exhaustion/reckless shenanigans, only to get up the following day, forgetting they were dead. Can you imagine a Jedi Temple mortuary? "Oh Kyle's only been declared dead for a day, we'll give him another week before confirming his retirement in the Force and organising his pyre"

I'm probably a bit tired but the morbid concept of infinite zombie jedi unless put to rest with fire is weirdly hilarious. It further justifies mandalorian flamethrowers 😅

(I know you probably mean Generic Kyle but my half-functioning brain substituted Kyle Katarn and like. it fits)

Okay but the idea of a functionally necromantic Force just...reanimating Jedi because they're a piece of the Force and nothing has changed is just...so good. so good. The Daughter joins the Force after that last sacrifice to save Ahsoka and suddenly just. The Force is in overdrive and no one is dying anymore. Everyone is shocked and terrified except the Jedi, who are just "it's the will of the Force and also now I get to be twice as reckless, score".

The Mandalorians are over in the corner going "We told you the flamethrowers were a good idea. We TOLD YOU."

#kat answers #but i really want to write this now

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husbandohunter · 2 years

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Hey I saw that your requests are open so, remember your genshin impact x reader, where the reader was very smol :X I have been recently Been simping intensely for ayato. Could you maybe make a part 2 where ayato is present? I would love to see that happen!

Inazuma Daycare [Baby Male Genshin]

Characters: Itto, Ayato, Thoma, Kazuha, Gorou

Synopsis: A supposed demon, a Yashiro Commissioner, a former criminal, a foreign servant and the General of Watatsumi…all under the age of six. Since it can’t be helped, you must do everything for them.

Tags: gn reader, platonic love, children

(A/n): When someone request the child series, it's free real estate *proceeds to insert the rest of the boys*

Arataki Itto

The loud kid who speaks before raising his hand. The kid who brings trading cards and aggressively shows off how poggers his legendary collections are worth MILLIONS (they're not). The kid who sucks the life energy out of your body.

"Teacher! Pick me, pick me!"

But you just can't hate him.

Itto would undoubtedly still be the tallest. His horns were like little bumps, barely poking out. He's not particularly savvy with his face painting skills yet, which you must fix it up for him after he got into a mess as always.

"I wanna use the colour red. Make it streak down like tears of blood on my face! Oh man, I'm going to look so cool!"

Okay Itto, now sit properly or this marker is going across your nose.

During art time, he likes to create his own version of 'Teyvat Creatures'. You had an earful of them: King of Hiligalaticalspectadogchurls and Evil Beans (the main villain of his hand-made manga by the way). Colours outside of the lines too. Very proud of his work. Sells them for 50 mora each.

Lunch time was the messiest for him. He can't hold his utensils and prefers to use bare hands.

The reason why Itto has such good beatboxing skills was that he practiced at a young age. Though he ends up spitting everywhere instead. You hope that he'll get better as soon as possible.

Voice cracks. You can hear him across the playground field.

But no matter how rowdy he is, Itto gets along with everybody and never leaves them feel left out. You find him inviting little children in the corner to a game of tag during recess. Sadly, he still ends up being last place in these games. Might pout. Might get salty. Might cry.

Itto refuses to agree that he is a crybaby. He runs a lot outside and would end up scraping his knee when too careless. You remember fixing a wound for him, his face would be all scrunched up as tears were piling up. He'll just keep repeating the same phrases: "this is nothing"/ "I'm a man and men don't cry".

You laughed, "Yes, indeed you are."

Kamisato Ayato

The kid whose parents fund your entire business. The popular trustfundkid. The kid way too mature for his age. Ayato holds tight to his refined image that he may come off a bit vain. Why is he even in your daycare anyways?

The first thing he does when entering you classroom was to mutter, "So this is where the donations went."

"Excuse you not everyone can afford high-quality furniture like you and for the record, I bought them myself."

When Thoma isn't available you'll be his substitute. It's unbelievable how rich the Kamisatos are. Ayato couldn't even fasten a sash knot and expected you to put on his kimono the moment he outstretched his hands.

You found a hidden bottle of Bubble Tea which of course, you confiscated. No desserts before lunchtime, Young Master.

Despite his rather lavish upbringing, you often found Ayato being picked up by his servants rather than his parents. His family loved him very much, but they were obviously too busy to attend their son's needs all the time. Since then, you saw him in a different light.

Thus when indoor recess was finished, you made Ayato in charge of putting the toys back into the toybox.

Thoma was about to help, that is, until you interjected faster than the Shogun's lightning.

This would be the first step to helping the young boy connect with his fellow classmates. He didn't have to be treated on a pedestal, he was an equal, a child who needed your attention more than anything. Initially, Ayato felt bothered by the tasks you gave to someone like him but those tasks ended up bringing the two of you closer.

For instance, serving the meals. Ayato genuinely liked your cooking much to your surprise. He was often served the best and healthiest dishes with the best ingredients but they lacked the cozy hearth-like feeling that you had. He said it tasted simple, yet honest.

Enjoys his hand being held when you both cross the street. Politely asks if he could keep holding onto you. “I like it when you hold me, teacher.” It's safe to say that the kid has grown attached, albeit clingy. Next thing you find yourself carrying him like a baby.

You will never know that Ayato intentionally finds excuses to follow you around. He'll get jealous when his classmates, even Thoma, steal your attention. And when you scold him for it, he'll get sad. But don't be fooled! They might just be puppy eyes.

Thoma

The kid every teacher- no, every MOTHER would dream to have. (Totally 100% a mommy's boy). He's got that vibe to attract grandmas and aunties of all sorts. Thoma deserves all the stickers and he always ends up claiming his sticker prizes first, for being such a good boy. In fact, he is the only kid that eats everything you serve, even the vegetables.

Give him the head pats, give him ALL the head pats (Ayato stares menacingly from the corner). "Whos a good boy? Yes you are, yes yoo are Thoma uuu!!"

In contrast to his master, Thoma was an appreciative, humble and attentive little boy. You found him glued to Ayato's side, performing duties such as carrying his luggage, smiling through the obvious heavy lifting. You feared that he was threatened and sold into child slavery.

Kid!Thoma would definitely be a ship figurine junkie. He'd bring in a new model everyday and held it tightly in his tiny, fat, little hands. It's so endearing to see him during indoor recess, when he drags his toy across the floor, making splattering sounds with his mouth.

"Sshhhhhhwishhhhhh, pow! Bam. Babababababbaammbam!!" he says while bumping two boats together in battle.

Thoma, boats can't shoot elements from their canons.

In art sessions, he drew you a picture of him and you together eating ?dango? (he tried his best, okay?), "This is for you teacher, because I love you soooo much!" HNNNNGG

*Clutching chest and dies of heart failure*

When there would be quarrels among the other kids (Oh the usual, Itto whining over how Sara took his favourite cup), he's the first to call you over. "Teacher said no more fighting, we have to be nice to each other!"

He's such a sweetheart. Thoma would pull in a stool and reach to sprinkle food into the fishtank before eating his lunch. He said he felts bad that the fish had to watch everyone eat while they wait for their turn :(

"Good job Thoma, here's your seventh sticker for the day."

Kaedehara Kazuha

The toddler 1/2

You recalled the day when Mister Tomo dropped off Kazuha on his in daycare for the first and he'd timidly clung to his pants while hiding from behind. He's a shy little one, still is. You had to do a little coaxing otherwise Mister Tomo would have been late for work and stayed in your school for the rest of the evening.

However when Mister Tomo managed to sneak out without Kazuha noticing, he started to cry immediately. It brought so much distress that Gorou felt like crying too. You had to carry him because if you didn't, Kazuha would have found some way and climb over the fence, chasing down the running figure.

It took a long time before Baby Kazuha became comfortable with you. He tends to be very sensitive, especially towards nature. You'd bring him to the school garden every once in a while to show him the flowers. He looked so cute when trying to grab a butterfly, twisting and turning in your arms.

Quiet reading time was when you spent most with the toddlers out of all the kids. Kazuha is the only one to take out a bunch of books but never go through all of them. He'd flip through a few pages before getting bored and moving on to the next. You found him to be an extremely fast learner when it comes to literate subjects.

The way his little smile stretches his chubby cheeks when he says a word out loud. That's it. That's the show.

Kazuha may be a toddler but he's old enough to walk and play with Itto and the other kids. The thing is, he never does. He prefers to quietly play in the sandbox with Gorou. It's a wonderful bonding experience for both of them. Since the day you taught Kazuha not to eat sand to draw shapes and build sandcastles, he couldn't pull away from it anymore. And if you did, he'll start whining.

Likes to play with the pet turtles. When I say play I mean he simply sits there and stares as they watch them slowly crawl on the floor. When Mister Tomo arrived to pick him up, Kazuha asked him whether they can have a turtle too.

Needless to say, he'll have no trouble coming to daycare anymore.

Gorou

The toddler 2/2

Juggling between Kazuha and Gorou was hard, especially when you had to shoo Itto away from petting his ears or prying Yae's hands from pulling his cheeks. He was often dropped off at daycare with a stuffed Shiba Inu in his arms, notably that it was his guardian and good luck charm. Everywhere he went, General Gorou Jr would follow him too.

Since he was still young, you also had to spoonfeed him his lunch. Ah but don't forget to feed General Gorou Jr! You would now be serving two small bowls as his stuffed toy took space on an empty seat. Most of the time it was just Gorou talking to his stuffed animal and you learned many things about his alter ego. From General Gorou Jr's birthday to the way that he liked his bread sliced up.

Gorou once placed his Shiba Inu against your cheek to mimic a dog kissing you indicating that General Gorou Jr appreciated all the work you've done. Totally not lowkey expecting a kiss in return.

It's funny how his dog sense would kick in and he would suddenly become shy about it. One of those moments was where he'll be digging the sand beside Kazuha's sandcastles and burying the shovels that were needed for the process. This would make Kazuha angry and they get into a fight over protecting/digging up the sandbox.

Then there were other moments when a ball would suddenly roll by (Yae) and it would distract him from whatever he was previously doing (ends up having his desserts stolen because no one was guarding it)

"Hehe, teacher did you know that Gorou sleeps while hugging his tail?"

See for yourself. When it was nap time, Gorou was the first one to fall asleep and the last one to wake up. He'd pull up his fluffy tail between his legs, nuzzling against the fur, dozing off into dreamland.

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remyfire · 9 months

Note

hi remy!! another 🎲 for beejhawk perhaps? lol :-)

(FINALLY GETTING BACK TO THESE a little at a time, please forgive me for the wait!

You get! A kiss on the nose! Have some post-war established forties-something men because I keep putting BJ through the blender in everything else. They deserve this)

Hawkeye is dabbing away the last of the shaving cream that got pushed to his neck when something about how he shifts makes the bathroom light hit him at an odd angle, and like a moth to a flame, his gaze skitters right to...it. To be fair, it's almost impossible not to see it, what with it being right there on his face, taking up an unfair amount of real estate, but...it. There it is. Unavoidable.

Nose.

Every day, he seems to be noticing something else about how his body is changing that gives him pause, but there's still a wide array of options that can take his mind off it—maybe even prove that however he's seeing himself in the mirror is completely untrue. Admittedly, a lot of it has to do with the doting attentions of one extremely enthusiastic lover who, once he's told what the trouble is, will go out of his way to demolish Hawkeye's uncertainty with all the subtlety of a wrecking ball.

Part of that tremendous ease BJ has with Hawk's worries probably has something to do with the decade and a half of experience they have with each other, truth be told. Still feels unreal, when he really considers it. From the minute Rudyard Kipling slithered through the air between them, it felt as if Hawkeye had known BJ Hunnicutt for his whole life. But just like anybody else, they had to fight and claw their way through bickering and misunderstandings and double speak and just downright assholery before they could finally get here, to a charming house in California where, against all odds, they appear to be able to spend the rest of their lives side by side.

They get to be together. They no longer hesitate about sharing the most minute thoughts of affection. God, with the ever shifting landscape around them of free love, how it's permeated down to Castro Street, they're able to even have public dates in a way that Hawkeye had never truly thought would become real. Dates surrounded by people just like them, everybody looking out for each other, smiling as they wander down the sidewalk or into a restaurant by the sheer power of the fact that they can just...hold hands. Kiss. Wrap their arms around each other's waists and claim and know down to their very depths that everyone around them is doing the same.

In a way, it's funny. On nights like this, where Hawk's less concerned about how close he can stand to BJ in public without interlopers starting to whisper, it seems to open up his mind to notice, again, those strange aspects of living in a body that's changing right before his eyes. Love handles. Shiny stretch marks on his thighs. Silvery hair.

And the things that aren't changing, but just becoming more apparent every day. Like...nose.

"How's it coming?" BJ asks as he wanders in from the bedroom, fingers cleverly securing his tie.

Hawk turns his head this way and that, eyes not moving from his face in the mirror. He ponders. Frowns. "D'you think my parents should've named me Rudolph?"

"Like Valentino?"

"No, like..." Hawk blinks and finally turns his attention to Beej. "Really?"

BJ shrugs with a little smile. "Well, yeah, hello." He strolls in and tucks himself up close to Hawk's back, resting the side of head against his. "You seeing what I'm seeing?"

It's all but impossible to look away from BJ's handsome face through the glass, actually, the way his grays have brought out the elegance of his mustache, how deeply the wrinkles at the edges of his eyes sink in when he grins like this. He's so solid. Safe. Sexy as hell. "You know what it does to me when you wear that tie, right?"

As his eyes turn into smoldering diamonds, Beej's lips curve into a lethal smirk. "Sorry. Losing my memory in my old age. You'll have to remind me later."

"You'll be lucky if I let you get out of the car before I'm fucking reminding you," Hawk teases.

BJ keeps his gaze right on Hawkeye's as he leans forward and presses a hot kiss behind his ear, the kind that makes Hawk hum and go a little weak in the knees. "We have a reservation," BJ reminds him, as though he's not touching the small of Hawkeye's back to keep him steady and press him into the bathroom counter all at the same time.

"Fuck you," Hawk murmurs.

BJ laughs, winks, then steps away to let Hawkeye get a deep breath to settle himself. It would be a shame to miss out on some amazing cheesecake when he can just let BJ get through dinner unruffled and then blow him in the front seat, if Hawk's back'll let him.

Maybe it won't. But wouldn't it be fun to try?

Hawkeye hangs up the hand towel, but the moment he looks back at the mirror to check his hair, his stirring thoughts go dead silent. "Really, though." As he lifts his chin, a combination of the lightbulbs they use in the bathroom and his skin, warm from the California summer, makes the very tip of his nose seem even more bulbous and flushed than usual. "Look at this."

BJ hums in question. He settles his hand on his waist as he leans into the counter for a better angle. "At what?"

"This! Are you kidding?" Hawkeye gestures at his nose more grandly than he did that new bike he bought Beej for Christmas the year before last. "Look at it."

"What about it?"

"I swear it's getting redder. Bigger. I don't know." As Hawk screws up his face, his expression briefly reminds himself of a cat, disdainfully analyzing the food that was just set before it.

BJ chuckles. "I really have no idea what you're talking about. It looks exactly the same as it has since the first day I met you."

Somehow that's an even more horrifying thought, that Hawk's gone this long thinking he's some handsome, sexy ladykiller—mankiller? That one doesn't flow as well. Maybe neither of them do. He shakes his head to try and dispel the thoughts before they can go racing away from him. "Okay, sure. Forget it. It's fine." It's not. He's fixating, stuck, compulsively spinning his mind around it so that even when he looks down to grab his bottle of cologne, all he sees in his head is a bright red berry stuck at the end of a crooked hose.

Beej makes a quiet sound—one that Hawk instinctively understands to be his problem-solving hum—before he slides a hand into Hawkeye's back pocket, against all odds managing to get his thick fingers in no matter how form-fitting the trousers currently are. "I think I could pick just about any part of you out of a lineup."

Hawkeye snorts, the corners of his lips quirking despite himself. "Oh, yeah, kind of like weeding out the weird freaky misshapen apple from the bunch."

"Nope."

He cocks his head, considers another angle. "Because when Erin's not visiting, I'm allergic to anything that's not a bathrobe."

"Close," BJ murmurs, his tone shaking only slightly with a repressed laugh.

"Okay, okay, okay." Hawk waves through the air. "I'll bite. Why?"

"Because you ruined any other body for me."

Hawk pauses, still clutching the bottle of cologne, staring hard at the faucet.

"You're not gonna believe me. But try." BJ nuzzles Hawk's cheek, the words inescapable from so close. "When Erin and I swung by SF MoMA the last time she was here—when you were pulling that emergency shift, remember?—I kept having this feeling when I was walking past some of the paintings, the sculptures. I couldn't really figure it out. It's all gorgeous stuff. Erin kept pointing out some of the most incredible details I've ever seen. She's got an eye for it, I swear. But it took me until I got home and came into the bathroom and you were in the tub, and I just...I saw you, and I realized that every person depicted in those masterpieces, yeah, sure, they were objectively lovely, and also they stirred nothing in me. They were some of the most lifelike pieces I've had the pleasure to see, but they were so incredibly fake. They couldn't hold my attention because they weren't you."

All at once, Hawk can't bear to look at him, turns his head completely away. It's strange. It's so fucking weird how they've been together all this time, and yet there are moments where BJ will see him so vividly that Hawkeye half-wonders if he's been walking around in a blur up until then.

But Beej's palm finds his cheek then, and Hawk feels it all the way down to his toes. No, there's nothing fuzzy about life for him. He's been seeing in brilliant clarity since Kimpo.

Slowly, slowly, BJ guides Hawk back around, like a planet rotating toward the sun, and the moment they lock eyes, Hawkeye finds his face so gently cradled in both of BJ's massive hands. Suddenly there's no thoughts of noses, of stretch marks, of sore backs. There's just a silent invitation to look and be looked at in turn.

Hawk can't stop himself from resting his palms on BJ's softening waist as he drinks in the sight of him. It's incredible how impossible it is now to separate the potent reaction he has to the lines on his skin from the way his muscles melt in relief that he's here at all. As Hawk falls deep into his blue stare, his blood sings for him as though they're magnetized. There's so little distinction between the visceral physical attraction and the comfort that he can tell now has only come from time, time, and more time.

BJ thumbs over Hawkeye's skin. "You know what this face reminds me of?" he asks quietly.

Hawkeye considers. A single butterfly begins beating its wings right at the base of his stomach. As desperately as he's trying to flip through his mental rolodex to find a joke, a quip, the combination of BJ's touch and the longing in his gaze stops any playful comments stone dead. "No."

"It reminds me that you're here. You're real. You're not some dream." Those stunning eyes wander palpably all over Hawk's expression, from his forehead to his cheeks to his chin, leaving no part of him unloved. When BJ's fingers brush along the creases at the edge of Hawk's eyes, Beej bites his bottom lip for a moment. "That we made it. That we're living. That no matter who was taken from us, we're still marching forward together. That every day, there's a part of you that changes—just a few dozens of billions of cells—" The casual nature of that number makes Hawkeye chuckle, makes BJ's grin widen. "—but that even when you change, you're asking me to come right along with you. Because you don't need me to stay the same. And neither do you. Because what matters is we're making the choice every day to love the man we see right there, right in that moment, and finding we never want to make another decision but to stay. To learn each other's minds and passions and bodies over and over again."

The fervency of Beej's words pick up the longer he talks, and Hawkeye leans into him, bumping their foreheads together with a shuddering exhale. "You're such a bastard," Hawk finally manages to whisper back, smiling so broadly that his cheeks hurt. "How do I follow up something like that? What am I gonna say, ditto? C'mon. It's not enough that you took all the stars in the sky and put them in your eyes, but you've gotta take all the perfect words too?"

"Look who's talking," BJ repeats in a voice that's so lush, so sweet that Hawk could never doubt it.

BJ cups Hawk's cheek more deliberately, and without another thought, Hawkeye closes his eyes and purses his lips, waiting for a millionth kiss from the man he gave up so little for and yet gained so fucking much from. But there's no gentle brush over his mouth. Instead, faint but intimate warmth presses right to the tip of his nose, and Hawk, already at the edge of emotional overwhelm, feels his legs buckle as he gasps and leans his weight into BJ.

Beej catches him, because of course he does, his arms wrapping around Hawkeye's waist in the exact space that was made for them. He busses their noses together, back and forth, and Hawk drags up fistfuls of BJ's shirt over his spine, pulling it out from under his belt, and lets out a whimper.

"I love your nose," BJ whispers, the heat of his words tickling Hawk's face. "I love your grays. I love your wrinkles. I love your figure, all the soft parts, all the knobby bits. I've never felt like this about anybody in my life. And every day, there's something new about you that lights me on fire. So hush. The next time you see something you don't feel like belongs on your body, you just come find me, and I'll make sure it feels plenty welcome, huh?"

Hawk barks out an unexpected laugh. "I love you so much. You asshole. We've got a reservation that you made. We don't have time for me to blubber up with the waterworks."

It's the silence between them that's always been a warning. Hawkeye risks a glance and finds BJ already smirking at him, toothy and dangerous, and just as Hawk's heart starts to flutter, he's already hopping away—but not before BJ finds his ticklish belly and grazes over it.

"No!" Hawk cackles without thought, leaping from one foot to the next in a shot of adrenaline that makes him feel like he's barely thirty again. "Don't you—don't you dare!"

"I'm just making you laugh," Beej taunts as he comes after him. He makes an impressive lunge, but Hawk manages to spin out through the bathroom door and scamper across the carpet. "Aw, c'mon, babe—"

"Menace! Dick! Ass!" When BJ makes another grab, Hawk somehow manages to duck under his arms. "Pri—no!"

As Beej catches his wrist at the last possible moment, he drags Hawkeye in and pins him gently up against the hallway wall with his broad form, kissing his nose, his cheek, his jawline. "Love you," he breathes.

Thoughts of cheesecake rapidly slipping away, Hawk tips his head back with a shivery laugh. "Love you too—" And then cuts off with a squirm the second his evil lover presses fingers into his waist. "Hate! HATE!"

#i just think they should get to be effusive and fluffy and live happily ever after #bj hunnicutt #hawkeye pierce #beejhawk #hawkbeej #hunnihawk #m*a*s*h #my writing #ask meme answers

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starseungs · 2 years

Text

➳ universe. ksm

pairing: kim seungmin x gn!reader

Every day, he thanked the universe for placing you in his life. Out of the millions of heavenly bodies in the vast sky, you outshone every single one in his eyes. He was waist deep in a slowly sinking phenomenon he could only describe as love.

genre/s: roommates au, angst, fluff, writer!seungmin, unrequited love

warning/s: work & financial struggles, high real estate prices (yes im putting this here), the angst tag is before the fluff tag for a reason (is this a spoiler? probably)

wc: 2.5k

note: behold, another angst from me. don't question it- at this point its the only thing i can write properly;; also this fic is connected to my felix fic if you want to read that after! the two are written to serve as stand-alones too, so it won't affect the stories much if you don't.

Seungmin finally looks up from the blinding light of his laptop and stretches his limbs for the first time since the sun said its goodbyes. His room was dark—the only source of lighting being the laptop’s screen, which only reminds Seungmin that he should probably lower the brightness setting before working in an environment like this. He already had a sinking feeling that he’d be needing a trip to the eye doctor soon.

And ending up with glasses would be such a hassle.

It’s not that Seungmin hated wearing them per se, but having to use the tool for reading things would hinder the efficiency of his job somehow. Of course, not to the point of a drastic difference, but he liked being able to work on his craft right away whenever and wherever.

You see, Seungmin is a writer.

Well, calling it his job is sort of a reach. His "actual" job was as a journalist for a news-based company—still in the same field, just different specializations. Seungmin considers himself quite good at both, though.

He loved creating stories. It was his way of destressing from all the chaos that was his list of news topics to cover. Who said journalism was easy? It was enjoyable, yes, but it physically hurts him sometimes when he’s being told to cover devastating topics. Maybe he was just too soft for the line of work. After all, his colleagues seem to be doing just fine with similar coverage.

Seungmin originally wanted to be a book author anyway. It has been a long time dream of his to watch his story and characters come to life in the minds of those who read it.

His passion for creative writing was something he discovered back when he was still a child. Books were always of interest to him; the concept of experiencing the characters’ lives through words and bringing life to the reader’s imagination was greatly thrilling. And that’s why one day, he simply found himself wanting to try it out.

Years after that event, Seungmin was now a fairly well-known writer on a platform where anyone could post their work. Along the way, he realized that being a professional author was so much harder than it seemed—but this chance was already enough for him. His stories were seen by more people than he had originally imagined, and that itself was a big achievement.

Like a normal person in society, though, he still had to find a job. Posting for free wasn’t going to support his daily life, which is why he ended up working as a journalist. The pay was decent enough to not make him live off of cup ramen like in his broke college days. Despite this, he initially struggled to keep a place to live.

Real estate prices were crazy high in Seungmin’s area. So much that it ate a good chunk of his paycheck just to keep the apartment he had. Sure, he had a stable job, but it wasn’t the highest-paying one out there—it was only about time that he would be struggling to keep up with rent.

And that was when he met you.

"Can I please just have another extension? I had to send money home this week, so I’m really lacking on the payment," Seungmin remembered pleading with the landlord.

He was severely behind on two months of rent at that moment, and the owner of the complex he lived in was starting to have his patience run thin.

It wasn’t something he could control! Seungmin’s sister had broken her leg and needed extra money to cover the hospital and recovery fees. He wasn’t about to leave his family hanging like that!

The landlord sighed and patted his back. "Sorry about this Seungmin, but if you can’t pay the two months by tomorrow, we have to ask you to move out. There’s another person who is interested in an apartment here, but we were already full," he said, dropping his arm off Seungmin's back. "We’re running a business here. I hope you understand."

Seungmin was left dumbfounded as the landlord started walking away. What was he going to do now? It’s not as if he could just magically conjure up enough money to fully pay two months of rent. Asking his family was out of the question—they already had their hands full with his sister. So what’s next? His friends? How comedic.

He didn’t have any.

The closest would probably be his co-workers, but it was a very professional relationship and stopped at general concerns. He doubts they would be willing to lend him more than simple pocket money.

"Hello? Excuse me, sir?" He hears a person calling out to him. He turned around and spotted you—who was peeking out your apartment’s front door. Oh, right. You were his neighbor.

"Yes?"

Seungmin watches as your eyes light up at his response. Why do you look so happy to talk to him? "I’m sorry for the sudden conversation, but it's just that I overheard your talk with the landlord. You’re going to be kicked out tomorrow, right?"

That was certainly one way to say it, he grimaces. Surely, you didn’t mean it in an insulting way, but the cheerful tone in your voice reminding him of the current situation was kind of putting salt over his wound.

Sighing, Seungmin decides to reply and get it over with, "Apparently. What about it?"

The universe must have been on his side at that moment, because your words certainly caught him off guard. This was not what he was expecting—

"Do you want to share an apartment? I have an extra room."

Granted, any random person who offers to live together would've been sketchy in Seungmin's eyes. But maybe it was your positive vibe that pulled him in, telling him that this was a good idea.

You were literally giving him a place to live, at half the original price. Having a roommate wouldn't be such a big problem, right? Plus, you seemed like a decent person to live with.

However, all his other considerations were thrown out the window at the speed of light once he realized once again how severe his issue was: he was on the brink of becoming homeless.

"Sure."

And that was where it all started.

Living with you was quite possibly the best decision Seungmin had made in a while. Not only did he continue to live in the same apartment complex (which was the closest to the train station in his area), but he also ended up with more money for spending because the monthly amount he had to pay for rent was cut in half.

You were such an angel too. Always making sure the kitchen was stocked, so that the two of you were living like proper functioning adults. It would take some more time before Seungmin was willing to go back to his college dorm lifestyle days. He's already been avoiding the instant noodle aisle in convenience stores for the past year.

In exchange for your generosity, he started doing most of the chores in the apartment—something you heavily thanked him for, because washing the dishes really wasn't your favorite pastime.

Due to this dynamic you both developed, a lot of your neighbors mistook you two as a couple. And no matter how many times you tried to correct the assumption, it just comes back stronger in the form of: "Oh, young love. You don't have to be shy about it! Both of you are adults now. Living together isn't that bad."

Except it is that bad.

The main reason you decided to have Seungmin as a roommate was that you, too, were running late on rent for that month. Unlike him, who was on it for the second time in a row, though, you had lacked just one month at that point, so the landlord let you get away with it.

Your job had to cut employees due to a financial crisis, and the pay was lowered by about one-fourth of the original. Luckily for you, your workplace considered you one of the best workers and decided to keep you among the remaining employees. Because of that, you didn't lose your job—only a pay cut.

Basically, that leaves you and Seungmin in the "struggling young adults" classification. Sharing an apartment was the best move you two could make in an effort to save your living standards.

On the other hand, if you asked Seungmin about the misunderstanding, he'd honestly say that it doesn't bother him as much as it did you.

Half a year into your roommate agenda, he found himself falling for you. The crush started not long after you first found out about his hobby of writing.

"So, you post stories online? That's so cool!" Was your genuine praise, looking at Seungmin's laptop screen with interest.

He, on the other hand, was developing cold sweat—a result of having you so close to him. You were currently hovering over his back, trying to get a peek at his draft document.

"Yeah—I, uh, post stuff sometimes," Seungmin replied with a small voice, not used to people praising his hobby in person. "It's nothing too special. But I like the reactions of the readers."

You hum. "How do you plan stuff? I'm not really a writer kind of person, but I do enjoy reading. I want to take a glimpse at your writing process."

Seungmin tried his best to not swoon like a fool.

Someone interested in his work? As well as the process? What a way to make him fall for you.

"I normally just have these bursts of ideas. It can be lines, plots, concepts, character traits, all that stuff. When I do get them, I open my phone's recording app and just say my ideas for future use," Seungmin explains. "I know others write them down as notes, but personally, I prefer verbally describing them, even if it's messily done."

The way your eyes sparkled as he pointed out more stuff in his writing process had him whipped in an instant. It was from then on that Seungmin's adoration for you grew even more romantically.

It's been about two more years since he deciphered his feelings for you. He'd never know how you'd managed to still be living with him—what he did know, though, was that it was a mutual decision.

You both never talked about it up front, but it was obvious that the two of you were now in a better place financially. It would be reasonable to want to live separately again, but the bond you formed throughout the two and a half years of living together was something that could not be broken easily.

"... Min?" He hears your voice calling out. You must be home already.

After stretching once again, he headed towards his door to greet you. Your eyes quickly caught his, the sight making you smile. This reaction was what kept Seungmin going every day.

"Were you asleep? Did I wake you up?" You asked, setting down the plastic bag you were carrying on top of the kitchen table. He shakes his head as a no. "Oh, that’s good. Your light was turned off, so I just assumed."

Seungmin laughs at you while he approaches the plastic bag. Once he got a closer look, he realized it contained takeout food. He looked at you in question. You merely motioned towards it. "Did you eat already? I brought you take-out just in case. Just place it in the fridge if you’re not hungry yet."

The action has him grinning unconsciously. It was one of your love languages to do acts of service, and knowing that, he felt extremely loved.

Taking out the food, he started unwrapping it while watching you take off your shoes on the sofa. It was endearing to see you relax and become more comfortable once inside your shared apartment. He felt special knowing that he was one of the only people to see you in your natural form.

Sadly, his joy-filled illusion was destroyed right away when he noticed the outfit you were currently still wearing—a devastating reminder of what had just gone on with your night.

"How was the date?"

You beamed at his question. At least you’re happy, he thought bitterly.

"It was great, Min! He was such a gentleman the whole time, I was practically swooning. His name is Felix, by the way. Just in case I end up introducing you two. You have an Australian co-worker, right? Chris, was it? He’s Australian too—do you think they know each other?" You chatted enthusiastically.

How fun. He could already tell that this Felix guy was a topic that would stay for a while.

The conversation hurt him, but Seungmin decides to entertain you nonetheless. "Maybe. I can ask tomorrow or something." You give him a thumbs up.

"Cool! I'll go and change out of this now. Good night, Min!" He waves back at you, watching your form disappear behind your room's door. When he finally heard a click, his arm dropped immediately.

It wasn't the first time you've gone on a date with someone else before. But it was the first time you went home approving of one—a very big deal, because this means whoever this Felix is, he's definitely getting a second date from you.

Seungmin was envious of the guy. He doubts he'll ever be on the receiving end of your dates. Something he knows and has tried before, albeit more indirectly. The result was soul-crushing, though.

Bzzt, bzzt.

His phone vibrated for a while, indicating an important notification. Considering he had all other notifications off except for messages, it must have been a text. He lazily picks it up, glancing at the message.

Y/N 🤍: i hope you liked the food i got you btw Y/N 🤍: love you bro 🤪👊

He simply smiles at his phone, even through the tears that have piled up in his eyes. As much as Seungmin hated being seen as a brother to you, he'd rather have that than nothing.

Yes, you saw him in a more familial light. It completely broke him for a while when he first confirmed it, but there was nothing he could do. Seungmin wasn't about to force you to like him romantically.

No, he would rather leave the shared apartment than ever hurt you on purpose. Both were thoughts he despised to the bone.

Exhaling shakily, he opens up the voice recording app and presses start.

"I know there’s a universe out there where we'll end up together. It’s just not this one."

mastertag 🏷️ : @h0neydewmoon

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cosmosgroundhogday · 2 years

Text

I like infodumping on tumblr now so you’re sitting through my bullshit.

So remember how in the start of Ride The Cyclone, Karnak explains to Ocean how he has only been given the power to bring one person back to life, and he then explains later that he has no way of finding out Jane Doe’s real identity and he really wishes he could; but then when he brings Jane back to life he explains the life she’s returning to is Penny Lamb.

Now think about how if you take Legoland Penny Lamb into consideration, it doesn’t actually make Jane any easier to understand. Yes her parents are in prison which is why if she died at the park she wouldn’t be easy to find family, the headless body in the Cyclone accident would eventually be identified as Penny Lamb. However, Karnak knows the future and so he can see that Jane never gets identified. So, Jane Doe being Penny Lamb makes little to no actual sense.

But when Karnak explains he can bring one person back to life, that doesn’t necessarily mean *their* life. Which is probably also why it had to be Jane, if Karnak sent back any other member of the choir he’d have to somehow put them in a scenario right before the cyclone accident where they didn’t get on but the rest of the choir did. While if it’s Jane, she can’t return to her old life because Karnak doesn’t know it and so he invents her a new life. Which also makes sense why we can witness Penny’s life from birth to death, Karnak didn’t just put her back before the cyclone accident but allowed her to be reborn into a new life where she can make memories from the very very start. So Jane Doe wasn’t Penny Lamb before death, but instead reincarnated as Penny Lamb.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. (Also that means Jane’s life before death is entirely free real estate for headcanons)

#ride the cyclone #ride the cyclone jane doe #jane doe rtc #karnak rtc

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sirenofthegreenbanks · 2 days

Note

🪲 Recommend a great fic centered on your favorite character!

cryptid!!!! these are all my personal recommendations for u!!!! fics that made me go “oh i bet cryptid would like that!”. (disclaimer: i do not take responsibility for any clowning involved in the posting of this reply!) im highly recommending them to everyone else as well though <3 hehe

zhou zishu (novel): our softest pieces by northofallmusic. post-canon i think, E. wenzhou fisting fic, its almost a character study that uses sex and fisting to focus on zhou zishu’s introspective journey of self-discovery regarding pleasure and sex. i read that recently and it?? blew my mind a little!?? i know you already know that fic and i know that because i DisCovered u in the comment section!! huehe (i wanted to go and poke u but I Nobly Refrained). im listing it anyyway because?? its so good?? anyways here is another one that i want more people to read, it also blew my mind: Inside Out by CaffeineAddict94, who is a beloved friend of mine and an amazing writer, i dont know, have you heard of them?? <3<3<3 post-canon domestic wenzhou, E, angst. zhou zishu has abandonment issues and copes with it by taking as much of wen kexing inside him as he can. i love how visceral and tangible your descriptions are here, interweaving zhou zishu‘s state of mind with what he experiences in the body!!! okay, im done with dorking around!! <3 i dont read that much novel fic in general and it was a bit tough to come up with a third fic, after my serious proclaimation at the start that this is going to be a personal recommendation list! When the night is quiet by mtkay13. canon divergence, set during the puppet manor arc, E, light angst. introspective, a what-if of the hypothetical scenario that wenzhou get intimate sooner then they do in canon. what does it take for that to happen? i love how MT solves the issue of zhou zishu‘s insecurity and uncertainty regarding the question of wen kexing‘s sincerity, that makes it very canon-compliant, and it has the typical wenzhou push-and-pull when it comes to expressing and baring yourself in your desire! i eat that up like cake

wen kexing (novel): closer by northofallmusic. post-canon i think, E. wen kexing wants to see what happens if he lets zhou zishu top him. feat. implied comphet, self-discovery, switching. the pov alternates between them and it has some amazing things to say about zhou zishu too, but im putting it here because i really love wen kexing‘s handling of the matter. also one of my most favourite wenzhou novel fics!

wen kexing (show): spare me by staringatstars. post-ep36 time-travel fix-it longfic, heavy angst, graphic body horror whump, T. i literally just recced u that!!!! but let me elaborate on it anyway, for everyone else. it has delightfully gore body-horror (mildly but it is there!) and centres fully around wen kexing‘s state of mind after getting yanked back to the past. if u have ever consumed a time-travel media that features someone finding their loved one in the past at a point before they meet, with the present timeline loved one left behind, and thought that this comes very close to a character death, and that just because these are technically the same person u cant just interchange them and call it a day, look no further! this fic explores exactly this situation, with a lot of grief/mourning and hopeless yearning involved. also: horse shenanigans!

here is my second, actual recommendation!! ive been wanting to recc u this fic for a while because i know u like angsty stuff and grief as a theme, and this fic is really really good at these two things, but i also know u have been holding back from reading longfics because of all the oneshots youve been meaning to get through first. but!!! its free-real estate!!! mwahahaha!!!!! Long Away And Far Apart by timetoboldlygo. post-canon time-travel fix-it, heavy angst, grief/mourning, T. zhou zishu doesnt get cured and dies after three years and wen kexing goes back into the past to change events and ensure they both dont have to end up being the people they are, not expecting to ever remeet his a-xu again except for in the afterlife. i loved that even though the premise is that zhou zishu hasnt actually died here, the author really went there and had wen kexing confront this ugly situation of losing zhou zishu (which is graphic, btw) and being forced to live with it, for 100k, before he finds out about it. its just ugly messy graphic grieving and being forced to survive when u just want to die, of building a new life out of the ashes of your old one, and feeling all the feels that brings with it. the new family dynamics between wen kexing and his parents that are automatically altered by this decision are also amazing. i read this fic twice so far, i think, and it made me ugly cry each time

lan wangji: The Roots Grow Riotous by hansbekhart. this is ,, like ,, my go-to fic when someone asks me to recommend mdzs fic (even though its no longer available) and its also the one i immediately think of in terms of lwj-centred pieces that blew me away. recommending this (or, honourably mentioning this) more in general because u already know it. in case someone has a friend who has a copy: modern au magical realism, E, longfic, heavy angst, graphic body mutilation, graphic body horror, grief/mourning, whump. is set in the fashion industry within the united states and focuses on the diaspora experience of being within that fashion industry as a work-related immigrant, especially in terms of race. i love how tangible lan wangji is in this. its really the character study of someone who is entrapped inside themselves and who is very bad at sharing what hurts them on the inside with other people. the magical realism as well as the mentioned body horror has to do with the actual live plants that grow out of lan wangji‘s body, and the graphic body mutilation comes into play when he him rips them out before anyone else can see. youve already said it in your own post, cryptid, the symbolism is amazing here!

here is my second recommendation which has not been removed from the archive. its doesnt have a lot of similarities with Roots but its also a lwj-centred fic i really like. wonder under summer skies by dragongirlG. modern au, cultural identity, E. also maybe light angst, because the topic of cultural identity and diaspora is written with the kind of weight it does have. this focuses on fashion as well but here from the view of an immigrant small business family-run tailor store in chinatown. i loved how this shifting relationship to your own identity, as diaspora, is reflected in lan wangji, clumsily but determinedly kneeling neck-deep into hanfu making and traditional clothing patterns, and in wei wuxian, whom lan wangji attempts to aid in his endeavour of reforging a connection to his long-dead parents. i dont remember more than that, its been a while since i read it, but it was so good!

bug me for fic recs!!!

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flatstarcarcosa · 4 months

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All ship questions for Abe :) (dadbodsandbots)

PRE-RELATIONSHIP

How did they first meet?

he broke into my fucking house and refused to leave. i have our story pick up after he dips in s2, and figure that i'm /near/ sleepy hollow but not directly in it. he finds my cabin and just thinks it's empty and free real estate. it is not. although. he never pays rent so i guess for him it was free real estate.

he kinda gets stuck because there's a bay window in the kitchen with sunlight blocking him on one side of the cabin and that's how i find him when i come home.

What was their first impression of each other?

monster fucking tendencies aside, there was some stuff on fringe news sources about the headless horseman. SH police tried to keep a lid on it but you know how the internet is. i am trope aware enough to be a bit wary of the headless serial killer now in my kitchen but also. i am on day 8 of 9 of work before a single day off between another 9 day stretch so i'm a bit kinda.

"don't gotta work if no head tho-"

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together?

doesn't really apply for obvious reasons. eventually i DO talk about 'the boyfriend' but am understandably cagey about a lot of it. i think some people think i'm just making up a boyfriend for some reason until he finally gets his head back and can like. be in public.

Who felt romantic feelings first?

oh i think he did. mine was just MAN BIG MCLARGE HUGE SEXY for a good bit, meanwhile me just treating him normally and putting effort into being able to communicate with him and being willing to trust him when he says (writes a note) that he just wanted to be left alone but hadn't considered what that entailed and as i've done him no wrong he has no reason to be hostile towards me so like. could he idk hang out. started getting to him.

his own mistakes leading to his own suffering aside there is the fact that like. man was already half dead when moloch showed up, it's heavily implied moloch and hell targeted him specifically because of his relationship with both ichabod and katrina to become the horseman, and regardless of people having damn good reason to treat him like a monster it still throws him for a loop to fumble into someone who. doesn't do that.

Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

also him. he teeters for a while between still wholly blaming ichabod and katrina for how things went with growing realization that they're NOT entirely to blame. also my hc's of 'he was in love with both, got neither, went a bit unhinged about it' he's hesitant to open himself up.

also, joking about it aside, he thinks for a while there's no way i'm not fucking with him because. he's fucking headless. he hasn't treated me monsterably but he is undeniably a monster so what could i possibly be interested in.

If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?

sometimes when it's late at night, especially if i've been having a bad time and am only finding sleep after days, and he's still awake watching me curled up next to him he thinks it's weird how things turned out. he's not a 'everything happens for a reason' type of guy, esp considering the things he's experienced but.

what are the odds, you know?

What would their lives be like if they had never met?

man wandering loose and alone in woods, foraging for murder victims. local alcoholic pharmacy tech crashes and burns.

GENERAL

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?

it was mutual. the notes/charades and half-assed ASL and me learning his body language actually made us VERY good at communicating non verbally. he started doing nice things initially out of boredom and to pass the time while stuck inside in an otherwise tiny cabin, but eventually realized that it was also. oddly rewarding to have it appreciated.

i don't think he realized it was mutual until i started being physically affectionate though. first time he was sitting on the couch and i plopped my ass down on his lap had him like

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

not really because of the obvious. i think the FL vacation we take after his reheading should count though. we spend two weeks down here and then spontaneously add a third only because he spent enough days being besieged by demons he felt cheated of an actual vacation.

"so you're telling me the nations oldest city isn't haunted, it's full of demons?"

"it's goddamn infested is what it is and i didn't bring enough shotgun shells for this"

"i mean. it's florida. they're not hard to find."

What was their first kiss like?

POV abe abbie and ichabod pop out of a hell port 3 days late after disappearing to stop an apocalypse. i'd assumed they'd succeeded when the timer ran out and the world kept spinning but i'd started getting worried. all three of them are exhausted and bloody.

abe only went because they cajoled him into it out of desperation, and the agreement that if he helped they'd give him his head back.

me, having the enchanted ring means i don't immediately realize he's already taken it back. surprise!

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?

i definitely think i was too focused on being an insane alcoholic trying to make it day to day to have had any relationships in this setting, so.

What’s their height difference? Age difference?

in my mind he's 6'4 (with head). which means he was already tall before imagine how fucking mad i am after the reheading when he's taller. age difference is like what 220ish slutty slutty years.

although, i remember something somewhere saying he was only 27 when he died. i don't know if that was an official age thing or just a fanon thing but if we roll with that and discount the years he was waterlogged in the river we're close in age.

What’s their relationship with each other’s families?

non-applicable. man's reheaded before he even finds out i have a sister. (so like, almost two years into knowing each other)

Who takes the lead in social situations?

by necessity for a while, me, because our only social situations outside each other are w ichabod and abbie and someone has to translate. post reheading it's usually him.

Who gets jealous easier?

him. i only do it if it's funny.

Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear?

oh that's equal depending on the situation.

LOVE

Who said “I love you” first?

probably him, but not until after getting his head back. cringe comp, horseman of death less emotionally constipated than i am.

What are their primary love languages?

Abe is gift giving, which is. ironic because the man fucking sucks at giving gifts. he STILL falls into thinking "expensive = good" and gets confused when he buys something meant as an obvious joke and i end up being DELIGHTED by it. also he turns himself into an acts of service ass mf, stays confused at how this happens.

mine is also acts of service, as well as quality time.

Who uses cheesy pick-up lines?

both but only For The Bit.

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?

i don't tend to engage in PDA much but i also don't rebuff it. i do however climb like a fucking tree at home, esp when it's a case of i had to struggle through work and my brain shut off the second i walked in the door.

Who initiates kisses?

it's mutual and genuinely depends on who's hornier.

Who’s the big and little spoon?

i am just a leetle creachur, i cannot help des.

What are their favorite things to do together?

when he's still headless obviously it's a lot of inside stuff. i think we do get to the point where we take the horse out at night though, but he's always a bit on edge to make sure no one is around.

reheading opens it up a lot more. he likes doing a lot of stuff outside just because of the novelty of being able to be out in the sun without burning to a crisp.

Who’s better at comforting the other?

look he tries but his immediate go-tos are a "oh, darling" and tea and sometimes i'm at the point where if this mf shoves one more cup of tea at me he's gonna have hot liquid in his newly regained eyes.

Who’s more protective?

him most definitely. although, i get defensive of him sometimes when it comes to abbie and ichabod. you don't have to like him or trust him (even though at a certain point it's clear he's not going to fuck them up any longer) but you're not going to be rude in my fucking house.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection?

abe leans towards both and i lean towards physical because i have Weird Hangups about Words.

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?

Royal Blood -- Little Monster

The Black Keys - Next Girl

What kind of nicknames do they call each other?

Abe. :) even though canonically others refer to his as Brahm/Brom as a nickname i think he likes i just defaulted to something else all on my own. Petnames aside he has a very specific way of saying Reese sometimes that makes it feel like a nickname.

Who remembers the little things?

i have chronic forgoring disease so it's not me, usually.

DOMESTIC LIFE

If they get married, who proposes?

we do not. he does eventually consider the idea despite initially thinking he was never gonna do that again but i am staunchly anti-marriage.

What’s the wedding like? Who attends?

How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like?

Do they have any pets?

Rufus :) also I end up getting some hamsters. he is immensely confused about having rodents as pets. he is also eternally frustrated that they keep getting out of the fucking cages.

it happens so often he'll find rufus just standing somewhere and looking between a spot under a piece of furniture and back again and it's just [deep sigh] "is there a hamster loose, rufus?" [small boof] "of course there is. you could eat one, i won't tell on you."

Who’s the stricter parent?

Who worries the most?

in general about anything i have the anxieties disorders. about specific things, he genuinely worries about the fact he's a magnet for demons and other hell creatures, and it only gets kicked up after some of them shred the cabin.

Who kills the bugs in the house?

it depends on the bug. he finds my eternal war against cockroaches fascinating and concerning. the way i can hear them in the fucking baseboards is genuinely unsettling.

one time a snake got in and all he heard from the other end of the house was "oh. ohhhh nooo, no not today. no sir. no thank you. may i ask you to vacate the doorway-"

How do they celebrate holidays?

i'm in the funk of just not doing so when we meet but i do think over time ichabod and abbie's influence drags us into it.

Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?

me, but he doesn't need much convincing.

Who’s the better cook?

well it's not the 18th century aristocrat that never did a single thing for himself before dying that's for fucking sure.

Who likes to dance?

i'm prone to moving around if i have music going and i think he tries to get me to like. dance-dance sometimes but i always get weirdly flustered about it for some reason.

#txt.txt #ship: trouble my heart

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notsomajestic · 3 months

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I feel like I really, really need to start putting in actual effort into finding a different job because the longer I'm where I am, the more I feel like I'm getting pushed towards my wits' end.

There's a whole load of bullshit going on that's difficult to explain to anyone who doesn't work where I do without writing an essay of context...but in the simplest possible terms, we got a new manager in January of last year and things have gotten steadily worse under her. She's trying too hard to "put her own mark" on the shop and just steamrolling over everyone else and doing things she really shouldn't without explicit permission from head office.

One of these things is allocating space amongst departments; each dept is meant to have a certain amount of shelf space as stipulated by head office (the actual amount of space varies by dept; confectionary gets less space than DIY, for example). I work on Toys & Stationary, and it's on the bigger side. Unfortunately, I have 'empty shelves' (not really empty but what I do have is spread out) while I'm waiting for summer toys to come back in, which will fill the space. Manager thinks the empty shelves are free real estate, and has put another department's stock on them without 1. asking me if I needed the space (I do) or 2. asking head office if she's even allowed to take space away from me. This has happened twice now and I'm sick of it already. I left work at 15:30 on Monday and by the time I started at 10:00 today (so three working hours total), she'd condensed everything down and put other shit in the two metres she'd freed up. The fact she did it at all frustrates me enough, but the way she obviously waited until I wasn't there to say anything before she did it just pisses me off even more. I'm sick of it.

And then she's one of those people where if you question her decisions, she takes it super personally instead of having an adult discussion about it, so you feel like you're walking on eggshells by just asking questions.

So there's all of this putting me in a bad mood before I even do anything, and now my body is finally starting to protest having to stand all day. I get to move around for most of the day rather than being stood in one spot, but my joints are making it clear that even that isn't appreciated. Literally every joint from my lower back to my feet is in agony and I know exactly what it is; my hypermobility is finally catching up with me. I can see that my knees and ankles are fucked just by looking at them, and I know the excess weight I'm carrying won't be helping matters either.

I'm just so tired.

#personal: ramblings #negative //

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 1 year

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hi!!! so i have been following your YouTube channel since (checks calender) 2018 so it's been a while, and I'm a huge fan, just a lil shy (you're so cool holy shit, your writing is mind blowing, aaaaaa), so ANYWAY the point of this ask is, body back sounds awesome, might i request some more vibes perhaps 👀👀👀

Omg hi!!!! I could cry to learn someone’s been watching my videos for so long 😭 thank you for all your support!! ❤️ when people think I’m cool it makes me v excited because I’m really just a little gremlin IRL! Happy you like my writing & appreciate all the engagement!

Of COURSE I can send more vibes for BB! First, here's just an excerpt because I'm about to go ham under the cut lol:

The pool he floats in belongs to a young couple. The man works real estate according to the signs Harrison’s seen of his face peppered around the neighbourhood. He’s wondered if that’s ever humiliating, to constantly see pixelated versions of yourself everywhere. But that doesn’t matter. His wife walks dogs in her free time, which means always. Last week, Harrison watched her jog with a vizsla, and just yesterday she spent the morning on their gable-roofed veranda brushing a wispy Alaskan malamute. That was the same veranda Harrison passed on his way to their yard’s fence. Perhaps they wanted someone to do what he did: hook his boot into the crisp rung of their gate, then swing right over. Why else would it have been so easy?

More in-depth BB rambles under here!

CW: drug addiction, mental illness, violence & suicide.

This project is taking over me right now, which might be a way of my brain procrastinating finishing Seventh Virtue (LOL), but I’ve learned to just lean into the hyperfixation so we’re here now!

I really felt drawn to write BB because of this extremely complex thing Harrison goes through in Moth Work that unbeknownst to 17-year-old Rachel who wrote it, she reaaaaaallllly relates to now at 21. I've been unable to stop thinking about this since re-reading MW, because I somehow profoundly represented this experience at 17 that I'm now undergoing at 21.

Harrison is supporting someone who needs a LOT of help (at this point in MW, Lonan’s been an addict for about 3 years, is chronically depressed, is in a constant disocciated state, has attempted suicide twice in less than a year). He feels responsible for this because he loves this person very much--he WANTS to help Lonan. But I don't think he realizes how much effort this will entail and that he himself doesn't have the sole power to "fix" anything. But he’s so young—how long can he handle this before he himself breaks?

The answer is: not long! One could say Harrison’s fatal flaw in MW is not wanting to change. He doesn’t WANT to leave Lonan behind because he doesn't WANT to lose him, he doesn’t WANT a relationship with his mom, Suzanna. At the same time, his life is at this tenuous impasse: things CANNOT sustainably continue in the state they're in, but he's terrified of them changing. And by the end of the book, both of those things happen—it’s his arc. The loose end is the prior point: he's terrified of change, but now the change has happened.

What I want to do in BB is take that loose end and light it on fire. I want to show what happens when that change happens. It's NECESSARY change, but in this moment, feels like the worst decision possible. BB is about the in-between space of being in a destructive relationship & eventually putting yourself first. For Harrison, the experience is extremely messy. He craves intimacy badly but has no idea how to love anyone but Lonan. He craves independence but is also scared of it: how do you start your own life when the last few years have been focused on someone else's?

In Moth Work, he creates the beginnings of a relationship with a man named Jeremiah (to be clear: H&L aren’t dating in MW, they never canonically actually date unlike how I make it sound LOL, only in the Seventh Virtue AU are they a couple!). Jeremiah is a really interesting character in Harrison's life because he represents something "normal." Here's when Harrison meets him in MW:

The motel is named after a dead woman—The Greta Arquette. Harrison discovers this while absently thumbing through a brochure at the empty front desk. The lobby is decorated with vintage clocks and floral wallpaper and it makes sense—the woman it’s dedicated to died at 92. He’s on page six when a young man with an earring and a hair pick appears behind the desk.

Harrison shuts the brochure and slots it back into the display. “Can I get a room?” he asks, already fumbling for his wallet.

“Long ride?”

The clerk—Jeremiah, according to his nametag—smiles. His skin glows amber under the lanterns hung from the ceiling, and his hair looks too good for 2AM. The collar of his uniform pastes underneath his sweater, and it’s almost charming, this unnoticed mistake.

Wait up for my video later today (3PM EST!!) where I literally in-depth analyze a couple scenes with Jeremiah (since I talk more about this there), but essentially, Harrison gets a small taste of what it might be like to be a "typical" 21-year-old here. It entails dancing with people you think are cute, enjoying each other's company without doing anything at all, going to breakfast, etc... All things he and Lonan have never done.

In BB, I want to show the breakdown of this "normal" relationship as Harrison more and more self-destructs to self-preserve. He literally cannot handle this change he's incited--who is he at all without Lonan? He doesn't know, and he can't handle that he doesn't know, so he "goes bad." There's brief mentions of this turn in Feeding Habits where Harrison addresses he was a bit of a disaster when he and his mother lived in Las Vegas, which is why his main goal in FH is to "restart" in NYC (and it's why he also gets destructive again in NYC when his second reboot fails).

I always knew elements of what happened to Harrison in Las Vegas, but didn't know the extent. In FH, the only element we're certain of is when he runs into the same woman Lonan runs into in ch. 6 of Moth Work. He essentially ends up being beat up badly, which for him (mostly his mother, Suz) is the last straw and what makes them pack up to NY.

It was only later, when he stumbled, bloody knuckled, through their front door, stepping over partygoers and martini glasses, that he understood. He hadn’t come to the party thinking about Lonan but managed to attract the same people. He hadn’t drunk the magenta liquid thinking about him but managed to exit the house stumbling, as Lonan did, his knees knotted like a newborn lamb's. There was something inconceivably indissoluble about them—their bond mirror-like, one making a decision, and the other mimicking it with vigour somewhere else, unknowingly inseparable.

But I've been wanting to write what happened BEFORE this, in the time between, which is what BODY BACK is going to be! Here's an excerpt from FH (ft. Jeremiah) that takes place during this timeline:

They saw each other in brief, neon stints. Drinking in his one-bedroom, after Jeremiah’s shifts at The Greta Arquette—a dingy motel—clattering, limb by limb, under his Styrofoam disco ball and calling it dance. They knew each other so little but so well. Where each groove of skin and bone on the other’s body was, what limbs could notch so perfectly together, like nubs of old soap fused together.

The vibes are going to be pretty much the above! Mirror balls, pop music, drugs in misty rooms, eat the rich, etc.

I've been excited to write this story because it shows a side of Harrison I only barely understood when I wrote Feeding Habits. It's actually why Feeding Habits was IMPOSSIBLE for me to write, because I was still seeing Harrison in "caretaker" mode when he actually was rejecting that fully. I wasn't used to seeing him make bad decisions. For all accounts, Harrison is a terrible person in FH. He takes advantage of his mother's kindness, he disappears to scare her, he's self-medicating, he's inviting Reeve to his place under the guise of catching up with an old friend when he actually doesn't care at all about her and only wants to see a glimpse of Lonan's face, he's stealing from the vulnerable, and doesn't want to stop any of it. FH is really Harrison's destruction arc, and BB is going to explore HOW that happened--what triggered those events?

I'd always seen Lonan as the "issue" in their relationship. This was natural in a lot of ways since Lonan started out as a literal villain (lol), but also mostly because I emotionally related to him most back when I was writing him. ALLL my negative emotions and struggles went right to him. It's why Lonan was my favourite character all throughout my teenage years. What I didn't expect is that at the age they're at in this book (21), I'd suddenly understand Harrison on a very, very different level. This is also another reason I want to write this like NOW because I'm 21 and in a similar (albeit wayyyy less dramatic) era. Is this sort of going to be autofiction, maybe!

I think in MW, Harrison doesn't feel much like an "adult" yet. in BODY BACK, he KNOWS he's an adult, and goes a little too hard knowing he can do whatever the hell he wants. If Harrison can do what he wants, it means he can reclaim himself even if it means destruction along the way. What's he willing to do to get his body back?

That's a q to ponder!

It's going to be lots of fun! LOL

#writing #fostered #bodyback #mothwork #I love this project sm already even tho I've barely written it #idk how I'm going to be a functional Adult until this thing is out of my brain

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limeinaltime · 2 years

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With the news of a possible Nope sequel, I feel it is time to dump more insane ramblings at 1 in the morning. Specifically on an idea/possible theme(?) that’s been bouncing around with my head for a bit. Note that this is all just an idea I came up with personally; I’m sure that whatever Peele ends up serving up will slap.

What if Jean Jacket did have babies at some point before the film, or laid eggs or whatever before its death? What if all that aggression and territorial behavior wasn’t just self defense? And what does media eat up more than baby animals (and child actors)?

The general idea is that after the events of the movie, Jean Jacket’s corpse brings a lot of attention to the Haywood ranch, the photo ends up on Oprah, blah blah blah, the ranch’s business kind of improves but not entirely, but the photo makes enough money for OJ, Em and Angel to recover from the whole event without OJ having to jump back into running the ranch again. The three are ready to put all the UAP shit behind them, until the dead body sitting on their property attracts the attention of an infant UAP, the last piece of Jean Jacket’s legacy. It would also be a fun parallel to the events of Nope; Jean jacket kills OJ and Em’s father, Em and OJ team up to kill Jean Jacket, leaving its baby on its own, round and round it goes.

This UAP lacks Jean Jacket’s aggression and hasn’t learned to attack and eat everything that perceives it, but is ultimately not something that should be kept as a pet anyway. It causes havoc around the ranch, but ultimately ends up endearing itself to the main cast in its own unsettling baby murder roomba way. Coined “Jorts” or something related to jeans, OJ, Em and Angel are basically stuck playing stand-in nanny until Jorts can fly off on its own and find its own turf without domesticating it, and keeping the hungry eyes of the network from sniffing out what they deem as just another piece of media to be consumed.

Maybe some scattered Jean Jacket history would be thrown in as well, like some weird parallel to the Haywood siblings with legacy and stuff (I personally think it’s a descendant of the Roswell UFO that was killed or just died, similar to how the Haywoods are descendants of the black jockey on the horse). The hypothetical sequel would probably have some unsettling but kind of cute moments as the main trio tries to wrangle Jorts and keep it from becoming another spectacle for the press to eat up. Maybe a whole bunch of UAPs see Jean Jacket’s now-free territory and think “it’s free real estate” and start wrecking the gulch again. Maybe we’ll get Star Lasso Experience 2: Electric Boogaloo UAP Dinner Party Edition. The trio ultimately ends up releasing Jorts back into the wild where it belongs. Nature is cruel and cannot be tamed, but it still has its moments of beauty.

I’m honestly okay with either outcome of whether or not Peele does make more movies about the Nope universe. Each potential setting opens the door for another interesting way to explore the potential terror the UAPs can bring down upon humanity, but if he chooses to expand on the main story, then I’m down for that, too. I am thinking about an AU/event in another part of the world involving my own UAP, Blackjack, so I’m not one to talk.

#nope 2022

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kaliperez · 4 months

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I think I’m stuck in a hotel room with a maniac.

Some back story: My family (my dad, my mom, my sister, and I) got bad news a while ago. We had to leave the State we’d been living in for the past 3 years on the 16th. We arrived at our destination (Washington State) on the 20th. We’ve been staying at the hotel ever since. The news of our move was difficult on all of us because the military told my father we were done moving, especially since he’s been working for them for the last 18 years and was about to retire. But then they promoted him without his consent, and now (my mom, my sister, & I) have no choice. We have been assured it would only be for 2 years, but that relatively short period means nothing to me since the next 4 years we’re going to be life defining for me (I was literally about to start university in our old State). Right now my mom is looking for homes to rent for the next two-ish years. But the housing market is so competitive, inefficient (everything is online now) and expensive; she’s just getting more and more stressed as the hour goes by. And she’s the only one who can look for homes because (with love) my father is kind of retarded and can’t do things that stress him out too long without having a breakdown — and by that I mean he’ll start seething with rage at the situation until he starts taking his anger out on us.

Now to the main story; The more time goes by the more I think my father is a maniac. My mother, sister, and I have been privately coming to the conclusion that their 25+ year relationship needs to come to an end. He was amazing in the first 10 years…then he took several brain injuries in Afghanistan and Iraq, and now he’s a monster. He’s so cruel. He likes to make jokes about my weight, my appearance, by body hair, my clothes, my hygiene, my hobby’s, my opinions. Even my optimistic suggestions. Everything. Nothing is off the table to be used for his “joke” material. Nothing is below the belt, or taking it too far. The only things that are off the table or “too far” are things that hurt his feelings. Those are OBVIOUSLY always off the table. That’s the only consistent thing about his morals and viewpoints; things that hurt his feelings/call him out are off the table. Anything that matters to anyone else? That’s free real estate.

As someone who grew up with his abuse since I was 12ish, I am very used to it and have hella coping mechanisms to deal with him. None of them are working right now. Normally I would leave the house for several hours at a time. I can’t do that because Washington has been sprinkling none stop for the past 4 days. Normally I used to smoke weed for days at a time to easily disassociate from my dad’s abuse. But I’m on base now, so I can’t have any kind of marijuana products or risk my dad getting fired. Normally I would smoke nicotine whenever I could’t get my hands on weed. But my older sister is “”morally “”against nicotine, so she’s refusing to buy any kind of vape for me (I’ll be turning 21 in March). Normally I would go to my room in the basement to avoid my dad. But now we’re stuck in THE SAME FUCKING ROOM. Normally my mom would have a private discussion with him about becoming a better person (with the silent threat of divorce leaning over his head). But now, he’s so “”stressed“” he completely doesn’t care anymore.

In the last month of us living in our old State, I was really thinking things were going to get better because my dad completely dropped all of his old toxic habits because my mom put the pressure on him. Me and my mom were so sure that we had narrowly avoided the on coming divorce because he had changed his ways so much. But now I think there’s no way there’s anything but divorce on the horizon. He has become so cruel again. He’ll callously laugh at the stupidity of my suggestions (I’m literally just trying to keep the peace by making “stupid” jokes and being light-hearted). I ask about who owns what towel (they’re all identical) so they don’t get mixed up, and he ends it with a “joke” about how it shouldn’t matter to me because I “only shower one a month when I’m going to go out” (I have actually been showering twice a day since we started traveling because of the stress. And the only reason I didn’t shower as often before is because we used to have only ONE shower between all 4 of us, and he “”owed“” it like he owns everything that he likes. Obviously). He happily “”joked“” that 130 pounds is too heavy for someone of my height (5’0). I am Latina, very curvy, or, extremely “slim thick” as they call it. All because I tried to give him some perspective over his own eating disorder by saying that I had become so much happier since I stopped exclusively caring about loosing weight. I honestly can’t put into words how much that last comment hurt because I don’t have the time or emotional bandwidth to write it, or how cruel every moment of that actually was. I could weight a 15 page book on how that moment went down and how stabbed in the heart I felt. I was literally just trying to help ease his distress over his weight and this is how he thanks me? Anyway, I brought this up to him yesterday because he wanted to dine on chick-fill-a, and I said something about my weight. For context, I went down to about 100 pounds on a heavy day for several months, had about 5 hypoglycemic attacks, and then gained all the weight back in the last 3 months. I said something about how I’d gain weight, he said I would be fine, I mentioned how I’m at the weight he disliked. And this motherfucker shook his head and denied ever saying that twice.

#toxic family #coping #blog

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lannasroleplaymemes · 2 years

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THIRST TWEETS

Send thirst tweets (either those listed below or your own) to my Muse for their reaction. Tweak as necessary, and feel free to send as Anon/specify they’re not from a specific muse.

"__ could wrap me in duct tape, shave my head, and throw me into a pool full of hot sauce from taco bell and I'd still say thank you." "Somebody tell ___ that my ovaries are ready to produce whenever they need them to. I'm patient." "I don't even know how but I want to suck on ___'s arms." "___ literally makes me want to set myself on fire from their immense sexiness so if they could dial it down a bit k thx" "I'd park my face on ____'s abs." "I was thinking about ___ and my nipples got hard." "Can I just suffocate ___ with my boobs already?" "Use my face as a trampoline." "____ can like, stick their tongue down my throat I guess." "____ could blow my back out if they wanted to." "I want ____ to light me on fire." "___ needs to spread their seed on my back like nutella." "___ could convert my vagina into a storage facility for their antique stopwatch collection if that's what they wanted to do with it." "I want ___ to fuck me so hard my ancestors end up with phantom pains." "____ is thicc and woke." "I'd never call anyone 'daddy', but for __ I may let "I would let ____ break my back like a glowstick." "___ could swim in my bussy and I'd stand by that." "I would let ___ split me in half like a pistachio." "___ can bite my nipple and snatch it out of my body." "My ideal weight is ____ on top of me." "I would not be upset if ____ spit in my mouth. I would use it as mouth wash." "I would let ___ raw me." "I just saw ___ choke a guy with his legs. Do me next." "Wish ___ would rip me apart like a lobster." "____ excudes big dick energy, I'm weak just thinking about it." "____ owns this hole." "I want ___ to fuck me through a wall." "___ could literally snap me in half and fuck me into the next century and I would let them." "I want ____ to smash a laptop on my tits." "___? I will be the most submissive and breedable hoe -- " "___ is single? Send them my fucking way I HAVE HANDS I HAVE HOLES I'M WILLING TO PUT THEM TO GOOD USE." "Don't mind me. Just a hole for ____." "I want to feel ___'s cute moustache on my hole so bad." "___ can run me over and I'd still suck that dick." "____ in case you're wondering, all my holes are free real estate." "I'm literally in love with ____ they could hit me with their car and I'd cum." "___ if you see this just know I wanna use your cum as a face mask." "I want ____ to breastfeed me." "I want ____ to explore my hole until they find another dimension and sends me to it." "I want ____ to wreck me like an iron fist going through a wet sheet of paper." "I would let ___ use me to mop their kitchen floor and I'd achieve orgasm from it." "I trust ____ to destroy my bussy." "____ makes my bussy sing first Soprano." "____ makes my bussy quiver." "___ come sit on my face I will eat your ass like a fudge brownie." "___ is so hot I will pass out" "____ if you read this I am free on Thursday night and would like to hang out please let me know if you are free Thursday night so you can hang out with me on Thursday night when I am free." "If ____ came up to me and said Hi I'd drop everything and plan our wedding right that second." "____ is hot, beautiful, and adorable at the same time and I don't know how that's possible." "____ WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO BE THIS HOT AND LETHAL?" "____ kisses better than kdrama oppas." "How much do you think it'd cost to have ___ step on me?" "I would literally give up my entire life, leave behind my friends and family, just to live in ____'s house as a chair. I would like them to sit on me every day for the rest of my life." "Yo ___ can fuck me up anytime anywhere, I'm always available." "Why won't ____ just give me a feet massage already?" "____ please eat my ass." "Yo I'd let ____ choke me to death with their legs." "___ please choke and straddle me, better yet let me straddle you." "I'd probably cum if ____ punched me in the face." "I don't think I can handle how hot ___ is, I'm crying." "____. HOLY FUCK, STEP ON ME QUEEN."

#rp meme #emo: funny #con: crack #emo: flirt #type: anon #type: inbox

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