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shepherds-of-haven · 4 years

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College!Au of Shepherd members? What likely are they (i.e. jock, player in the soccer team, bad-boy, the clichès.)? definitely not thinking of writing an au, and im certainly not thinking of maybe making a small edit about it. nOt aT aLl cApTAiN

Hi there! Have you seen the college AU asks? This one is pretty detailed about what kind of students they are, and this one is more succinct with their majors/minors! But I’m always happy to go more in-depth about AUs! 😉

In my imagination, Blade, Trouble, and Chase were suite-mates freshman year and get an apartment together when they’re not living on campus. (Halek, Red, and Riel are also roommates and then Riel can’t stand living in a dorm anymore so he buys a townhome with his family’s money and allows Halek and Red to live there to give himself some semblance of a social life.)

Blade is the scion of a very wealthy family who’s expected to take over the family business one day. Instead he majors in Criminal Justice and--in my imagination--secretly aims to become either a detective or a prosecutor because he suspects his family is involved with criminal organizations. He’s generally quiet, solemn, broody, and troubled (just like in the game lol) and is only dragged out to do “normal” college things by Trouble and Chase’s persistence! He’s in the fencing club and also goes to a mixed martial arts gym off-campus, sometimes with Trouble, which also happens to be the one Briony goes to.

Trouble is in ROTC and majors in mechanical engineering, with dreams of joining the Air Force and becoming a pilot after graduation if he can keep his grades up. For some reason I have this idea that he got into this university on a soccer scholarship? He plays guitar and later gets a dog because fuck it, he’s always wanted one, and he’s rebuilding an old motorcycle in his spare time at this garage where his old school friends work. He definitely wears bomber jackets and letterman jackets like, a lot. He’s very popular and considered a “jock,” but a friendly one! He has an English class with Red and a math class with Riel, going to both of their study groups and then driving them crazy because he either doodles instead of studying or texts. Part-time, I feel like he delivers pizzas for some reason...

Chase is the third part of their trio and is more lax about his studies than the other two (which is a bad influence on Trouble). He does not talk at all about his family or home life and generally spends the holidays with either Blade or Trouble’s families. He’s an undeclared major and has no idea what he wants to do after college and is not worrying about it. He pays smart kids to do his homework for him, so he has an excellent GPA, much to the class president’s (Riel) fury. He’s part of a frat but doesn’t actually drink at parties, more concerned that everyone’s having a good time and making fun memories than he is about himself. He doesn’t allow any scummy behavior in the frat and secretly, on a whim, auditioned for a student play and is surprisingly very into it, to the point where he asks Briony and Trouble for help with his lines. After throwing a huge party where [x] happens, he starts a group chat with everybody involved in this story and it’s sort of how they all become friends, even though many of them already knew each other individually. Oh, and he’s very into Tinder, much to the chagrin of his other two roommates.

I think Briony, Ayla, and Lavinet are also roommates, and so are Shery, Tallys, and Mimir. Briony-Ayla-Lavinet’s place (BAL? Brionaylavi?) is Party Central, whereas Shery-Tallys-Mimir’s place (STM? Shallir?) is Quiet Coffee-Drinking Art Loft Sometimes Hipster Slam Poetry Book Clubs Central.

Briony is either a journalism student or a law student, I can’t really decide. She takes a lot of extracurriculars at their university as a way to blow off steam, including a painting class (which is where she met Shery) and a horseback riding class, because why not? She has been training at the same mixed martial arts gym since she was a teenager, and she starts bringing Ayla and Lavinet there so they can defend themselves when they’re not altogether. Despite her cheerful attitude and popularity around campus, she seems to be running from a past back in her hometown that she doesn’t talk to anyone about, not even her closest friends: an obsessive ex and a dark past are just some of the things she doesn’t want catching up to her. Sometimes she earns part-time money covering shifts at the cafe Shery works at.

Ayla is a journalism/communications student who will later switch majors to hospitality and hate it. She gives wilderness tours and white-water-rafting tours in the summers as a seasonal job and plays volleyball on the university team during the spring seasons and track and field during the fall. Her grades are abysmal and she goes to the tutoring center often for help, which is how she meets Red and Riel. She rides a Vespa around town and also attends the yoga class that Tallys teaches. Yes she wears leather jackets and occasionally beanies. She was too cheap to a buy a meal plan at the university cafeteria so she often skims from others or uses their extra meals before the week runs out. She is a lover of junk food and crams their apartment pantry with all manner of chips, soda, ramen, packaged mac and cheese, and etc! She also definitely games.

Lavinet is a wealthy socialite daughter of the CEO and founder of a huge conglomerate: think a Paris Hilton, but more grounded. She’s majoring in business and political science, being groomed to take over her father’s role, but she wants a taste of “normal” life before that happens. All of her rich friends from high school thinks she’s slumming it with the other kids, but Lavinet’s having the time of her life. She tries not to stand out too much, but she unconsciously does, anyway: wearing designer coats and sunglasses to class, driving a flashy convertible, and keeping her books in a high-end handbag, because backpacks are “schlubby.” She means well but can sometimes be a bit of a drama queen to her roommates. She also loves juicy gossip and eats it up! She has been known to take her roommates’ phones and flirt for them with potential dates. She has a popular vlog and Instagram account, which I imagine is how Briony’s dark past catches up to her. She loves to get coffee at the shop that Shery and sometimes Briony work at and always seems to have a latte in her hand. She can point at any given person and name what lipstick they would be if they were one. She’s fairly good at her studies and loves to be in charge of study groups and gets into a war with another girl who tries to ‘poach’ her study partners. She absolutely takes French and fashion design classes and heads all over campus turn when she walks past!

Red, Riel, and Halek live in what is known as the “Nerd House.” Red is pretty much always at coffee shops and libraries, studying and reading, so much so that he doesn’t notice multiple other students checking him out in his rolled-up sweater sleeves and messenger bag. He’s got a bit of an “Academic Hipster” vibe and definitely has hipster tastes in music and books. He goes to poetry readings at cafes (of which Mimir is a staple) and goes on a lot of first dates that don’t lead anywhere, giving him the reputation of either a really picky person or a playboy. Does he wear glasses? Absolutely. Is it because he needs them? Probably not. On some subconscious level he is probably aware that he looks smart and cute in them. Sometimes he plays pickup soccer with Trouble’s practice team (he played in high school) when he realizes he’s been sitting around too long reading and needs to get some blood pumping! He studies philosophy and history as a double-major.

Riel is the class president and later valedictorian of their class. He majors in math, business and finance, history, and psychology as one of the university’s only “quadruple majors”. He comes from an extremely wealthy family that has donated so much money to the school that many of the buildings have his last name on them. Occasionally he volunteers at the tutoring center, where his worst and most rebellious student is Ayla, who he vows to break. You can often find him in the music building, reserving one of the practice rooms to play beautiful classical piano, which he doesn’t like to play at home with his roommates around. He abhors eating or studying outside because, mysteriously, every time he walks through the quad, a frisbee hits him in the head. He is the head of a business fraternity that is constantly being pranked by Chase’s frat.

Halek initially attended their university as a Food Science major, but dropped out and now attends the culinary arts institute across the street. (His twin brother, Naolin, goes to a prestigious university across the country and is studying to become a doctor.) He works as a barista at the cafe where Shery and sometimes Briony work as servers: the one with sleepy eyes that you end up spilling your life story to when you sit at the counter to drink your frappe and study. Plays the drums in a band that performs at open-mic nights and owns a tank of fish. In class he was constantly falling asleep at his desk but has no trouble now. Definitely smokes weed in his room occasionally and has a litany of tattoos up and down his forearms and hands (and for that matter, Ayla does too).

Finally, the Art Loft trio, Tallys, Shery, and Mimir, who definitely have a garden on their roof and hang their clothes up to dry in the sun up there, which Lavinet for whatever reason refers to as their “solarium.”

Tallys is a plant biology major who aims to be recruited into the country’s top holistic/nature-based pharmaceutical company. She teaches yoga outside of class to make money (and Ayla and sometimes Lavinet attend her morning classes). For whatever reason I feel like she smokes and looks really freaking cool doing it but decides to quit after a relative has a cancer scare. She enjoys classical music and plays the violin when she can. She is shares cooking duties with Shery and picks her up from her job at the cafe so she doesn’t have to walk home at night, leading many to mistakenly assume they’re girlfriends. She constantly has AirPods/earphones in, listening to music, and rarely speaks to others outside of class. Strangely, she owns a flip phone and owns no social media.

Shery is a nursing student who loves to cook and bake as a hobby. She’s a natural introvert and prefers to stay in with her roommates, watching TV while she embroiders, or something, but one day she decides she wants to be more social and that’s how she befriends Halek and Briony. She owns a cat who rules the roost in their apartment as well as a hamster. She keeps detailed diaries and also writes poetry, but is too shy to share it with anyone, including Mimir, her roommate who’s an art major. She always wears pastels and very cute clothing and is a straight-A student. Her parents are pretty stingy so she works at a coffee shop, the Haven, as a way to earn money. She’s also helping with costume design for Chase’s play and rides a bike to campus and to work. She’s close with her professors and often visits them during office hours just to chat.

Mimir is an art student who’s making a big splash in the local scene, as she’s regarded as something of a young genius for her bizarre slam poetry and cryptic, surrealistic paintings. She often does readings at the Haven coffee shop during open-mic nights, and she constantly wears a hoodie, even to class. She paints her nails black and rocks that goth artist aesthetic, complete with dark eye makeup and black lipstick. She rarely speaks, but when she does, it’s usually to say something startlingly-insightful or incredibly mysterious. She feeds birds in the main quad on campus, to the point where they recognize her and will fly to her hand. She smells constantly of incense and can sometimes be seen rummaging around in trash cans on campus for her art installations. There is a mysterious cloaked figure on campus who rides a unicycle while blowing on bagpipes that also spew fire that everyone thinks is her, and she only smiles and fades away when anyone asks.

#aurynofhavens #Shepherds of Haven #AU #modern AU #college AU #college #university #all characters #long

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shochmonster · 4 years

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84 Questions

original: https://fuckyeahsurveys.tumblr.com/post/61049002526/84-questions

Put your music player of choice on shuffle and list the first 10 songs Guns of Brixton - The Clash Holiday in Cambodia - Dead Kennedys Chainsaw - Nick Jonas California - Joni Mitchell Make It Wit Chu - Queens of the Stone Age This Woman’s Work - Kate Bush The Bad Thing - Arctic Monkeys Between the Bars - Eliot Smith Drown - The Smashing Pumpkins Different People - No Doubt

If you could spend a week anywhere in the world, where would it be and why? Would you take anyone with you? I’d take @duoloopo to the UK. I’d like to see places other than London.

What is your preferred writing implement? (eg. Blue pen, pencil, green pen) I use my iPad stylus the most, but I have this heavy mechanical pencil I really like for drawing.

Favourite month and why? October. I just love the fall vibe.

Do you have connections to any celebrities (even minor)? List them. I went to undergraduate school with Rebecca Sugar. We used to ride the bus between NYC and DC together on holidays.

Name 3 items you could pick up from where you are. Can of seltzer, pencil case, stack of bills

What brand logo is closest to you currently? REAL Skateboards

Do you ever play board games or other non-computer games? Got any favourites? I love Small World and Munchkin.

A musical artist you love that isn’t well known Laura Stevenson and the Cans

A musical artist you love that is well known Red Hot Chili Peppers

What is your desktop background currently? Thomas Barrow on the beach in the Season 4 Christmas Special

Last person you talked to, and through what you talked to them @duomaxwell02 with my face :O

First colour name you can think of that isn’t in the rainbow White

What timekeeping devices are in the room you are currently in? Two wall clocks, though one is very old and doesn’t wind anymore. I also have a clock @duoloopo ‘s dad made for me. It’s on the piano.

What kind of headphones do you use? JBL Bluetooth, noise canceling

What musical artists have you seen perform live? Foo Fighters (3x), Incubus (3x), Red Hot Chili Peppers, Smashing Pumpkins, Beastie Boys, Audioslave, Justin Timberlake, Troy Sivan, Arctic Monkeys, The Rolling Stones, Eric Clapton, Queen (but with Roger Daughtry, not Freddy... for obvious reasons.). Probably a whole bunch of others I’m blanking on.

Does virginity matter to you? Not really.

What gaming consoles do you or your family own? PS4, PS2, PS1, XBox 360, N64, Gamecube, Wii, NES, SNES, various Gameboys, Nintendo DS, PSP

What pets do you have? What are their names? Two cats, Hemingway and Renji

What’s the best job you’ve ever had? I like freelance art gigs the best. As for ‘normal people jobs’, I once was a sign painter for Whole Foods. That was pretty fun, minus the work drama.

What’s the worst job you’ve ever had? Food service.

What magazines do you read, if any? I’ll pick up Time once in a while

Inspiration behind your URL? My classic original URL was LinkWorshiper and had been since AIM first existed. I picked it because Zelda was the first fandom I ever joined. Now I’ve changed all my handles (except on AO3) to reflect my actual name, as my literary agent thinks it’s more professional.

Inspiration behind your blog title? Mean Girls. I always chuckle imagining Thomas and Jimmy as some Edwardian version of the Plastics.

Favourite item of clothing? My Downton livery waistcoat. And the stiff bosomed shirt and collars I have to go with it.

Are you friends with any exes? Nah. By the time I felt comfortable enough to possibly try, I also didn’t care enough to.

Name at least one book you loved as a child. His Dark Materials (the trilogy by Philip Pullman). I still love them and am jazzed that he’s writing more these days.

What’s your native language? If that language has distinct regional variations, which variation? (eg. AU English, US English) US English, mostly a northeastern dialect/accent

What email service do you use? Gmail

Is there anything hanging on the walls of the room you are currently in? So much stuff. I have a mood board full of Downtons stuff over my desk, various DA posters and memorabilia, plus some artwork I’ve done, and some of my JC Leyendecker collection. The aforementioned wall clocks, a San Francisco cable car bell, Sailor Moon and a few other little knickknacks, like my hamsa. To name a few lol.

What’s your favourite number, and why? 212 because it’s Manhattan’s area code and also because it used to be the notation for one of my favorite ships in an old fandom.

Earliest moment in your life you can remember? Sitting under the table and looking at my grandma, who was wearing a Cruella Deville dress she’d knit herself. Like, it had the actual Disney character on it. Pretty cool to a little guy, I guess!

What did you have for dinner yesterday? Quesadilla

How often do you brush your teeth? Whenever they feel gross

What’s your favourite candy/chocolate? Lately, I’ve been into Junior Mints.

Have you had other blogs on Tumblr? Do you have any other blogs currently? This blog used to have my old handle, linkworshiper. I did a small Whole Foods blog when I worked with them, but it never went anywhere.

If you were suddenly really hungry, what would you choose to eat? Sushi

What fandoms would you consider yourself a part of? Downton Abbey, though lately I’ve been crazy busy and not as active as I once was. Casually still poking at old fandoms like Zelda and Gundam Wing to name a few.

If you could study anything, what would it be? More art education can’t hurt. Maybe some formal history education.

Do you use anything on your lips? (eg. Chapstick, gloss, balm, lipstick) Chapstick

How would you describe your sense of humour? Seinfeld

What things annoy you more than anything else? Mouth noises

What kind of position are you in at the moment? Sitting

Do you wear much jewellery? Nope

Who is the leader of your country, currently? Any other levels of government with leaders? (State, region, province, county, district, municipality, etc) Three supposedly equal branches of government, currently being run into the ground by a clown

Last 3 blogs on your dashboard, not including any of your own @halcyondaze @mab1905 @lavender-hued-melancholy

What do you carry your money in? I try to never carry cash, but I carry a small wallet

Do you enjoy driving? Why or why not? I like it but sometimes it feels like a chore, especially during a commute. @duoloopo thinks I’m a shit driver so she tries to drive whenever she can, which has pluses and minuses.

Longest drive you have ever been on? Savannah GA to San Francisco, CA in a UHaul

Furthest away from home you have ever been? Germany

How many times have you moved house? God, I don’t even know. More than ten.

What is on the floor of the room you’re currently in, not including furniture? Cat toys, unused canvases

How many devices do you own which can access the internet? Phone, computer, iPad, various game consoles

Is there is anything that is guaranteed to always make you happy? Thomas and Jimmy <3 <3

Is there anything that always makes you sad? Thinking too hard about being a failure

What programs do you currently have open? I just rebooted, so only Chrome, Spotify and Photoshop

What do you associate the colour red with? This line in the Kate Bush Song Blue Symphony, which goes, ‘I associate love with red, the color of my heart when she’s dead.’

Last strong smell you can remember smelling? The Greek food I ordered in for dinner

Last healthy thing you ate? Roasted veggies

Do you drink tea or coffee, and how much per day? I prefer tea, and I drink coffee for energy, though sometimes I think it just makes me crash harder.

What do you associate the colour blue with? The sky

How long is the closest ruler you can find? 12 inches

What colour pants/skirt/etc are you currently wearing? Dark blue

When was the last time you drank water? About a minute ago

How often do you clear your browser history? Rarely

Do you believe nude photos can be artistic, rather than erotic? Yes

Ever written fanfiction for anything? Oh God, yes. You can still find it under Link Worshiper on AO3, though some of my ‘classics’ have been removed since I turned them into original manuscripts

Last formal event you attended My cousin’s wedding

If you had to move your birthday to another date, which one would you choose and why? Maybe inch my birth year up just by two so that I’d stop being called a damn millennial. At my age, I really just don’t relate to the generation even though technicalities make me a part of it.

Would you prefer to be at a beach or in the countryside? Beach

Roughly how many people live in your town? 52,000

Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? Leonard Nimoy :D

Favourite place to shop? Can be a certain store or a place where there are multiple stores I haven’t really gone shopping since the pandemic. Right now, it feels like the only place to buy anything is Amazon XD

Do you have a smartphone? What kind? If you don’t, do you want one? Samsung. It’s not a Galaxy but is a new model and a fraction of the price.

What is your least favourite colour, and why? I don’t think I dislike any colors honestly.

How do you spell grey/gray? Grey. I’ve got too many British online associates to ever go back.

Go to your dashboard and describe the image shown in the radar section (below the “Find blogs” link) It’s Umbrella Academy fanart of Klaus. He’s in black and white with this hands over his eyes and the background is red. It’s very graphic.

What difference is there between how many followers you have, and the number of blogs you follow? 736

How many posts do you have? 8,859

How many posts have you liked? I can’t find the stat D:

Do you post mainly reblogs, or your own content? Mainly reblogs but I pepper in my own content when I can. Lately, I haven’t had time to do as much fanart though, and I kind of feel like it’s not worth bothering to post my original stuff. Nobody follows my blog for that.

Do you track any tags? No.

What time is it currently? 7:33 PM CMT

Is there anything you should be doing right now? Waking up @duoloopo. TIME TO JUMP ON THE BED.

tagging, if they feel like it: @abbys-little-whippersnapper @bumblebarrow @irrationalgame @downtoncat @mab1905 @duoloopo

and everyone who I’ve forgotten

#personal #about me #questions

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kimsgoeun · 3 years

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💘 + whoever you’d like?

@dreamingincolor1x1

eden x elijah

where they first met and how: probably at some meeting where she first met calhoun, though eden didn’t pay as much attention to him aside from their greetings.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved: for eden, it’s might be a few months after flirting/hooking up with him. she definitely viewed their situation as a nice distraction from the castle/queen life, especially since she isn’t close with anyone there.

who fell for who first: elijah.

where their first date was and what it was like: i would assume a “first date” would be set up by elijah and it would involve them eating together or something in either a room away from everyone else or they’d be eating together under the guise that elijah is just watching out for her. but eden would be kind of surprised about it since she’d have related being around elijah to hooking up.

who asks who out and how: elijah? by note or i’d assume when they’re secretly speaking to one another.

who proposes first: in an au verse, i’d assume elijah lol. our main one idk if that’ll happen ;-;

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away: kept a secret.

where the proposal happens and how: if there was one in their main world, i’d assume it’d be on their own where prying eyes and ears couldn’t keep tabs on them.

if they adopt any pets together: no.

who’s more dominant: eden, but they both can be.

where their first kiss was and what it was like: drunken (probably on her part). i’d assume in the gardens or maybe his room (if she went searching for him). depending on how much tension there is between them, it’s probably very heated.

if they have any matching couples stuff: probably not matching, but maybe they would’ve exchanged something small they could wear without being detected.

how into pda they are: if it weren’t for them doing this behind the king’s back, she’d be up for it.

who holds the umbrella when it rains: elijah.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is: some abandoned room at the edge of the castle. or somewhere deep in the garden (they should have a maze on the grounds lol).

who’s more protective: elijah.

how long it is before they sleep together: if it were her choice, she’d do so immediately. but maybe a few weeks after their first kiss? especially if there were other kissing moments leading up to it.

if they argue about anything: calhoun ;-; being jealous. whether or not they’re something serious.

who leaves more marks: eden.

who steals whose clothes and how often: eden would if she could.

how they cuddle: spooning.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is: walking the grounds and talking.

how long they stay mad at each other: days. eden could go a week since she’s petty.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are: teas, whatever herbal ones the kitchen has.

if they ever have any children together: no? but can you imagine the drama if they did!!!

if they have any special pet names for each other: probably not. aside from the usual my queen / your majesty on his part.

if they ever split up and / or get back together: yes and yes. they probably each end things for their own reasons but then cave and go back to each other.

what their shared living space is like: clean because of him but high-end/luxurious because of her. if they had their own place.

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like: late night drinks and an exchanging of small gifts.

what their names are in each other’s phones: eli / eden

if they have any ‘couple traditions’: not unless elijah wanted one. it wouldn’t have mattered to her to have couple traditions.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first: eden / elijah

who’s the big spoon / little spoon: elijah is big spoon, eden is small spoon.

who hogs the bathroom: eden.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside: elijah.

declan x cora

where they first met and how: in town, probably at the local bar. declan was definitely already on the tipsy side and went up to hit on her.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved: it’s probably different for them both. like declan could fall after a few months and be completely shocked by it and then act like he doesn’t have genuine feelings. cora might take longer since she’s bound to think he’s being insincere.

who fell for who first: declan, maybe? like unknowingly anyway.

where their first date was and what it was like: declan goes all out and tries way too hard to be impressive. so like a nice dinner in the city with all the works and then they both end up hating it because it’s stuffy and not fun, so they end up doing something stupid in some hole in the wall place.

who asks who out and how: decaln does constantly lol. but in that annoying tone that sounds like he’s just teasing her.

who proposes first: declan would if it got to that and she stated she wanted a proposal.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away: kept it a secret.

where the proposal happens and how: some remote spot away from paparazzi. declan rents some cabin or something for them to spend the weekend at.

if they adopt any pets together: maybe like one.

who’s more dominant: cora.

where their first kiss was and what it was like: at her place? like him dropping her off after having hung out. declan would be very tempted for it to be some long, drawn out thing, but if they kissed and he wasn’t immediately rebuffed, he wouldn’t chance it lol.

if they have any matching couples stuff: no, but he’d have bought her something that ended up being super expensive.

how into pda they are: more arms around each other rather than holding hands. if she was okay with it, he’d kiss her a lot since he’s a lot more affectionate than she’d have expected.

who holds the umbrella when it rains: declan.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is: coffeeshop in town or her place of work maybe lol.

who’s more protective: cora.

how long it is before they sleep together: would they wait a number of dates maybe?

if they argue about anything: him leaving for work/his old life. not being public. not fitting in each other’s world. lack of communication on his part.

who leaves more marks: declan. he is very smiley when he sees them on her.

who steals whose clothes and how often: neither?

how they cuddle: face to face.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is: bickering.

how long they stay mad at each other: a few days.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are: he takes black coffee. cora drinks both?

if they ever have any children together: no.

if they have any special pet names for each other: no.

if they ever split up and / or get back together: yes on a split up. maybe on a get back together.

what their shared living space is like: cluttered probably. or very minimal depending on if her place they lived together in or his in the city.

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like: if she didn’t have family to spend it with, he might make a trip of it.

what their names are in each other’s phones: hot blond (and later cora) / if not declan i’d assume ‘jerk’ or ‘do not answer’ lol

if they have any ‘couple traditions’: watching movies on opening night. some kind of food night each week.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first: declan / cora

who’s the big spoon / little spoon: they switch.

who hogs the bathroom: declan.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside: cora.

jean x levi

where they first met and how: did we say they were neighbors too? otherwise they met in kindergarten or something. probably desk mates and jean wouldn’t have left him alone. if neighbors then their families introduced each other and had some lunch gathering.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved: a semester maybe?

who fell for who first: jean.

where their first date was and what it was like: at a diner they both like or maybe some store they frequented together. jean would be nervous the entire time until levi makes her laugh or something and then relaxes in the end.

who asks who out and how: i want to say levi, but how cute would jean be if she blurts out an ask out to him.

who proposes first: levi, if applicable.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away: would he want to keep it a secret? just because he wouldn’t want people talking about her/them. meanwhile jean wouldn’t care and would want to tell everyone.

where the proposal happens and how: their favorite restaurant maybe? or at one of their places where they decorate the place and make the evening special.

if they adopt any pets together: yes. jean would insist on a cat and dog.

who’s more dominant: both.

where their first kiss was and what it was like: i just imagine at the library while they’re studying or something cute like that.

if they have any matching couples stuff: keychains or a phone charm. jean probably picked it and worried levi would hate it.

how into pda they are: they’d do the usual hand holding or an arm around each other when they’re sitting together or walking. hand kisses!! also brushing hair out of their faces.

who holds the umbrella when it rains: levi because jeans insists on trying to but ends up getting them both soaked or pokes him in the face.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is: a diner near campus.

who’s more protective: levi.

how long it is before they sleep together: a year? maybe less depending on how he feels about it. jean would be so nervous about it, and would want to, but probably talks herself out of asking about it to him.

if they argue about anything: how people talk about levi. about wanting levi to treat himself better.

who leaves more marks: levi or neither. jean will be bright red every time she sees it.

who steals whose clothes and how often: jean. she constantly steals shirts or sweaters when they hang out. partly because she’s cold and the other because she’s clumsy and definitely spills stuff on herself all the time.

how they cuddle: face to face. or she just cuddles against his chest.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is: talking while they snack. something simple.

how long they stay mad at each other: a few hours if not shorter. jean tries to stay mad longer but can’t since she’d get all puppy eyed around levi after a fight once they did talk again.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are: jean likes teas. coffee gets her to hyper. levi goes for coffee? and then makes fun of her inability to drink coffee.

if they ever have any children together: yes.

if they have any special pet names for each other: he calls her jeanie. she doesn’t have one for him but is determined to find something equally embarrassing to call him.

if they ever split up and / or get back together: no? hopefully.

what their shared living space is like: comfortable. clean. definitely feels lived in but in a good way.

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like: they probably spent it together with both their families (here for their parents to be besties).

what their names are in each other’s phones: jeanie / levi

if they have any ‘couple traditions’: not that i can think of.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first: levi / jean

who’s the big spoon / little spoon: levi is the big spoon, jean is the little spoon.

who hogs the bathroom: neither? or levi lol.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside: both.

max x renee

where they first met and how: at a video conference/convention type of thing. or maybe at some after party for that convention.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved: half a year since they probably went weeks without talking due to their work.

who fell for who first: max. heart eyes from the get go.

where their first date was and what it was like: in their hotel room after getting take out (just so they weren’t bombarded by fans).

who asks who out and how: renee does. if not in person, then through a text because they’re planning on being where max is for some unspecified amount of time.

who proposes first: max.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away: keep it a secret even though all their fans know they are a thing based on how often they talk about each other / show up in each other’s videos.

where the proposal happens and how: max would research romantic places and do it on a trip they take together. maybe also creates some art piece for her.

if they adopt any pets together: yes.

who’s more dominant: renee.

where their first kiss was and what it was like: at max’s place when renee is visiting maybe? it was probably awkward (in a good way) since they were waiting for the other to make a move first.

if they have any matching couples stuff: some kind of jewelry or travel bags.

how into pda they are: they’d be comfortable with each other, but probably aren’t overly affectionate unless they’re on their own.

who holds the umbrella when it rains: they take turns.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is: some artsy cafe max finds. some cool brunch place renee finds.

who’s more protective: renee.

how long it is before they sleep together: because of their schedules, maybe a year?

if they argue about anything: not getting to see each other. going public.

who leaves more marks: renee.

who steals whose clothes and how often: renee. because max has all the cozy loungewear.

how they cuddle: face to face and spooning.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is: traveling and exploring new places.

how long they stay mad at each other: a day or two.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are: max likes tea. renee coffee or both.

if they ever have any children together: maybe, if renee wanted kids.

if they have any special pet names for each other: max will jokingly call renee her muse, so maybe like my muse / my artist kind of thing would be cute.

if they ever split up and / or get back together: they could, if the long distance becomes difficult.

what their shared living space is like: artsy. a mix mash of styles because of renee’s traveling. maybe like a bohemian chic kind of vibe?

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like: something simple and romantic. lots of snow and they order take out and drink hot cocoa by a fire or something.

what their names are in each other’s phones: renee / max ?

if they have any ‘couple traditions’: bringing back a souvenir from renee’s travels. having renee be the first person that gets to see max’s finished art pieces.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first: renee / max ?

who’s the big spoon / little spoon: they switch.

who hogs the bathroom: renee.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside: max.

#dreamingincolor1x1 #hc: eden lohr #otp: there is an us somewhere #hc: declan finch #otp: i met you and the story began #hc: jeannette waring #otp: i hope you see right through my walls #hc: maxine joly #otp: can't i be that person for you?

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wiredandrewired · 5 years

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This got too long and I put it below a cut, screw it.

So I have a whole lot of stuff about Quintessence sitting in files and folders and on sticky notes around my desk. Both VLD’s use of Quintessence and like...actual alchemical Quintessence (using the exact word and also similar or related terms) and places I semi glued them together. I just.

I have whole huge SWATHES of this that’s not ever going to get out of my personal notes and whole huge SWATHES of it that is going straight into Project ReVolt when that starts going up. But the other day I started derailing at @quixotic-quetzalcoatl in the comments for her fun pre-oldadin Altean revolution fic about robotic laws and their universality and also how once a species goes interstellar you have to scale up all their qualifiers for ‘worthy of rights’. Because as we all know, at least here on Earth, it has always taken TIME for ‘basic rights’ to actually be granted inclusively to everyone. And we still don’t grant them outside our species because, haha, that’s silly. Even though we know there are, say, intelligent emotionally complex species on earth like octopi and also that we eat them, because they are delicious and we can’t communicate with them in a meaningful way and they lack a visibly structured society or any kind of culture. ‘Freedom is the right of all sentient beings’ is cool and all, but it only extends as far as we’re able or willing to parse sentience and I SWEAR TO GOD I am getting back to Quintessence here.

And anyway I have been thinking about this ever since that conversation, and cannot contain it until ReVolt goes up. And I’m kinda curious where people (especially the Alteans Were Not Inherently Good crowd) stand on it. But I mean. Let’s face it, that should be everyone because no culture is ‘Inherently Good’, that’s an oversimplification and a form cultural fetishization Lotor definitely thought of Alteans as Inherently Good Allura definitely thought of Alteans as Inherently Good that is not the basis for a healthy relationship y’all

So. Quintessence. I’m not like gonna break down all the rules and laws of it or anything, or get into distillation and the implications thereof, because this thought is not about that. But the short and simple version is that alchemically speaking, Quintessence--undistilled into form--is like gravity: EVERYTHING has at least a little, and things with more exert force on and can affect things with less.

A simple living thing (a plant) has a more than a non-living thing of the same mass (a rock), and a complex living thing like with a soul and everything (a human) has a lot more than a simple living thing of the same mass, as they also have that ‘metaphysical mass’ going for them. So by this token, in Voltron a Balmera--a complex living life form--has a LOT more Quintessence than a similarly sized moon or even planet, even though it might have less actual mass, being hollowed out and all. We also know that some Alteans (Sacred Alteans) can use the same non-physical communication methods that Balmera do with the smaller lifeforms living on them (meaning it’s a form of nonverbal communication fully compatible with something they already do), and also that those same Sacred Alteans can exchange some of their own ‘life force’ with the Balmera after taking a crystal from them. They have a whole ritual for it. I am gonna have fun with this in ReVolt Sacred Alteans also are the ones who do neat things like healing people when they’re ‘dead’, transferring ‘souls’ (have I mentioned I have THEORIES related to the body/metabody model on why the Rift hits people like it do?), opening wormholes in the fabric of space and time... Other things that, once you sit down with even a basic rule model, obviously have to do with exerting their personal Quintessence Gravity on people and things around them.

What this tells me is that the amount of Quintessence that a Sacred Altean contains, for whatever reason, is HUMUNGOUS for their size. To be able to exert that kind of ‘gravity’ on the world around them, on complex lifeforms around them. And there clearly has to be some kind of ability to them to...I guess ‘perceive’ it for lack of a better word? Because things like the wormholes is really precision work (and it works with MULTIPLE Quitessences is the thing, given the whole ‘scalturite comes from a living thing and therefore has the relative Quintessence appropriate to that’ bit). Things like fishing one soul out of another and carrying it and then fishing it out of entanglement with your own metaphysical non-mass? Precision work. It’s balls-out crazy, guys. They’re like the dudes in FMA using handclaps and finger snaps to perform elaborate alchemical processes that ought to take weeks or months and tons of materials and study but without any of the sacrifice or prep work FMA props use and cranked up to 11. (Disclaimer I never got deep into FMA). I mean, clearly they did use SOME tools for this, especially in its most scaled-up forms, but some of it seems to be bare-hands inherent and it’s WILD.

This also suggests some actual logic to how the heck people are ‘chosen’ to get the Mark of the Chosen and go into Oriande; it’s literally a matter of metaphysical gravity, it has nothing to do with worthiness, that’s the whole reason there are trials once you get there.

Someone, please imagine with me the kind of impact and implications this has for them in a non-vacuum. Both within the Altean culture itself, but also, outside of it. Why do some of them have so much more ‘mass’ than others? Is this something Lotor was trying to recreate in his colony/at his facility? What effect did one’s personal ‘mass’ have on ones’ place in society? We know those with more would have been valued, it’s baked right into their tech, but what about those with normal or even below normal levels? Because it’s baked into so much of the tech that we see, would they have difficulty operating things on a day-to-day basis, or did this literally only effect one very small group? Like Lotor says some Alteans are ‘less magical’, but how far does that go? And then there’s space...man. Okay. Once they got off their own planet, you would have a class of people who could perceive the ‘gravity’ of other races they encountered. They literally would have a built-in metric by which to determine whether or not something was viewed as a ‘lifeform’, and if so what kind: people, or non-people. And this is very different than looking at a thing and simply saying ‘we can’t communicate with it in a meaningful way, it must not be sentient’ or ‘it doesn’t seem to have a culture it must not be sentient’ or even ‘this is not a lifeform that evolved in a way or from an element we’re familiar with life having, it must not be alive’. This is literally having a universal metric, a Law of Metaphysics if you will, that you can apply to determine if something is alive regardless of whether that life seems significant or obvious. A Balmera is not ‘obviously alive’ and is definitely not alive in a familiar way, but clearly Alteans had an at least semi-symbiotic arrangement with them, and at no point are implied to have disregarded the native Balmerans claims that their planet was a living being that spoke to them as primitive or superstitious. Interestingly their arrangement with Weblums seems slightly more parasitic, or hunter-gatherer at best, unless those Altean Nightmare Terraformers we see on Naxela sometimes are used to kill off planets, but all this means is that from a mass perspective, it has the ‘gravity’ of a less complex lifeform. This suggests that at least some of that might have been value-based, which okay, you have to expect.

But what if the Alteans--who aside from the Sacreds are VERY LIKELY to have a very high baseline compared to their mass all things considered--ran into a species with a lower baseline level? Like, a fully complex, fully developed species, thoughts, feelings, culture, etc, lower than they had reason to expect? Here on earth, we’re always running into new things that challenge our ideas about the way things work. Did Alteans have a baseline below which a species might not have even been considered ‘alive’ by them, based on what they had experienced and studied? Or at least alive in a meaningful way? Alfor sure didn’t seem to take the Arusian natives into account as people when he plonked their reasonably-should-have-been-pursued castle down there in the middle of a war. Galra show signs--a LOT of signs--of being very rapidly and very strongly affected by Quintessence around them, which would suggest that they have relatively low levels for their mass and complexity, and possibly even having a hard time repairing their own Quintessence (which is A Thing that complex lifeforms are supposed to be able to do). Oh my god yes it’s replenishable listen Alteans in jars would be weirdly hyperefficient if they did it in shifts? As a volunteer thing it wouldn’t have been vile Lotor smh Catch me plugging Sacreds into stasis tubes *SLAPS TUBE* THIS BABY CAN POWER SO MANY COLONIES

And I’m REALLY curious about what people think about that, and just the implications of the whole mess, and I want to hear theories and this has gone on forever, and I haven’t eaten in like twelve hours and I’m late for my meds, and I’m gonna go get food because my brain has shorted out but like someone please tell me I’m overthinking this or scream with me about it or smth.

#VLD #worldbuilding #Alteans #possibly Altean critical?#I don't think so but??#Voltron has no idea what it's doing with Alchemy so I make my own fun #long post #longpost #sorry #disregard I'm a nerd #I have a side theory that the Olkarion can do similar things but only with the significantly smaller non-living things #and it makes me wonder if the species are related or it's just a case of convergent evolution #Honerva was a black hole she sucked the life out of everyone #LOUDLY SINGING GRAVITY IN THE DISTANCE

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tvntae · 5 years

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heartbreak hotel 2

pairing: reader x ceo!jeon jungkook

plot: was sleeping with your boss really such a great idea?

genre: smut (eventual), angst, fluff

word count: 2.7k

You wake up the next morning feeling a little more refreshed than usual, you had gotten the job offer of a lifetime, and you happily accepted it. Of course, you’ve never actually been anyone’s secretary before, let alone anyone’s assistant, but you would have been a fool to decline. Picking up a few more hours than what you had agreed to when you started your associate position in the sales department wasn’t really all that bad. Your rate of pay as an associate wasn’t all that bad, to begin with, you couldn’t stop imagining what type of cash would be rolling in now. You squeal out of excitement, salivating at the thought of real, home-cooked food now that you could actually afford to spend extra every month on expenses. Hell, you might even go all out and pay for some cooking classes, God knows how bad you need them.

Walking into Nochu this morning felt like your first day all over again. That uneasy, stomach-churning feeling. You couldn’t even begin to describe just how much you hated being nervous. You get all sweaty and icky feeling, and it was the absolute worse. You could only hope and pray no one would be able to see how wet your pits were because that would be extremely embarrassing.

Jungkook had emailed you exactly where to go and what office you’d now reside in. You were gonna be on your own now, no Choi Jiwoo, no loud mouth Karen. Just the sound of your 10 fingers typing away at your keyboard and the ringing of your phone every once in a while. Paradise. Along with Jungkook’s email came a list of small instructions for you to complete before going to the top floor where your new office was located.

The first task on the list was to collect any belongings you may have left back in your old department, i.e., pencils, pens, notebooks, etc. You didn't really have a lot, to begin with, but there were some personal items there that you would have hated to leave behind. Especially that cute Starbucks tumbler your mom had shipped to you a few weeks back.

Thinking about it now, you have never actually been to work this damn early in the morning, your regular shift hours were 10 am but soon that you work directly for Jungkook he has you coming in at 6 am. For what precisely? You weren’t sure. You did hear around town, the town being the office, that Jungkook was an early bird. He’d work from about 6 am to 6 pm. He was a strong man, a strong man indeed.

Your old office was pretty dead at around this time. The only person who should supposedly be here at this time is Ms.Choi and speaking of which, she was the second task on your list for today. Jungkook wants you to pick up some papers that were alleged to be dropped off to his office weeks ago but knowing the ever unpredictable Jiwoo, she felt as though she always had more important things to do than to complete a task handed down by the big boss. Even if Jungkook’s task seem quite unimportant, you still wouldn’t want to be the type to be on his wrong side. Jiwoo, on the other hand, could give a shit less.

You knock on Choi’s office door, once and then twice, but no answer. You reach your hand out to grab her doorknob but before you could touch it, you hear her obnoxiously slow paced loud heeled walk. You scoff, holding back an eye roll and turn to come face-to-face with your old department manager. Choi looks you up and down, you can tell in that tiny brain of hers that she’s trying to figure out why you’re here. She looks at you almost as if you're a nuisance. She’s irritated by your presence. You’re just as irritated as well but not because of her crooked eyeliner or the lipstick on her teeth, okay maybe that’s got a little to do with it, but it’s the intensely strong perfume she decided to douse herself with today. God, she smelled like a mix between a nursing home and a high school cafeteria. You repress a laugh, sweet one Y/n.

“What brings you to my humble abode, Y/n?” There goes that creepy fucking smile again. If only the Gods above gave you the willpower to smack it right off her old face, you would.

“Mr.Jeon needed me to come by to pick up some papers. I’m not sure which ones but he said you should know.”

“Oh, those papers, they still aren’t ready. Is Jungkook gonna keep hounding my ass on a few lousy papers that have absolutely no purpose to Jungkook nor myself?” Jiwoo grumbled. “He isn’t gonna have you coming down here every single day to remind me about those dumb papers, is he? Because if that’s the cause what use are you?”

“Okay, first of all rude, and secondly I have nothing to do with whatever kind of beef you and Mr.Jeon have I’m just the messenger, appreciate the fact that he sent me and didn’t come down here himself to demand them. I just started this new position. Keep that in mind Ms.Choi, I’ll be letting him know that you in fact still do not have his papers, but for your sake, I'll be sure to leave out the part where you were giving me lip. Have a wonderful day Jiwoo.” Honestly, the nerve of that old bitch. She must believe her job is treating others like shit. How was she even still employed here?

“Move,” she hissed. Bumping your shoulder purposely while she passes you to get to her office door.

“Gladly!” You make sure to give her the brightest smile possible as she does so. You hear her slam her door, and you can’t help, but that think task #2 is and was a success.

Task 3 was relatively simple, all you had to do was report back to Jungkook, and from there he would get you situated and layout ‘ground rules’, as he put it in the email. You were hoping he wasn’t actually some tyrannical boss behind closed doors because, to be honest, him saying he wants to go over some rules with you kinda threw you off.

The hallway to Jungkook’s office seemed impossibly long. It felt like something straight out of a movie, it was shocking. It was never-ending, until, you know... it ended. For some odd reason, you thought Jungkook would have like bodyguards up here or something. I mean yeah, it wasn’t like he was a mafia boss, but he was an extremely important businessman. Isn’t that like a protocol for them? To keep personal assistance with them at all time?

You knock on the door as instructed by Jungkook’s email. You hear a faint ‘come in’ and open the door to the biggest office you think you’ve ever seen. The windows behind Jungkook’s desk is what catches your eye the first glance around. He has the most gorgeous serene scenery to the city of Seoul you could ever imagine. His office was the size of your living area and kitchen combined. You oohed and ahhed at the mysterious paintings hanging on the walls. His office was so homey and inviting you almost didn’t believe it was real. It smelled like the sweetest of fruits and candies, and it brought a smile to your face.

Jeon Jungkook is entirely living the life of a wealthy CEO. If the fact that your employment rested in his hands weren’t enough to tell you well his luxury office would.

Jungkook smile is what greets you. He gestures to the chair sitting across from his desk and asks you to take a seat. You do as your told. The chair is large and somewhat uncomfortable, you slowly sink into place and can’t help but feel a bit embarrassed by it. You hoped he didn’t notice, because oh-boy if he did he’d probably think you were some type of slacker and send you right back to Choi, the bitch you just told off 10 minutes ago. You can bet your life she wouldn’t hesitate to make your life a living hell.

“I uh have a few things I need to go over with you before I get you started,” Jungkook starts, “It mostly just work ethic stuff and what not, ya know, the whole nine.” Jungkook laughs. You nod your head in understanding, and he begins. He explains to you how punctuality is critical, that he’s swamped lately and he barely has enough time to get dressed in the mornings. You were taken aback on how comfortable he seemed around you, but it was probably for the best seeing as you’d have to be up close and personal with him from now on. Or at least until he decides if or when he wants to get a new secretary. His ‘ground rules’ were fair. It wasn’t anything impossible or harrowing. He discussed precisely what kind of personal secretary you were. You were on call at all times unless he decided otherwise. On call meaning in which whenever and wherever you were needed you were to be made available. He said that it was highly possible to work around a schedule that would work for the both of you. You had the same amount of vacation days as you did before as an associate, but he did up your paid sick days. You were extremely thankful for that, seeing as you rarely took vacation days and always opted to take sick days.

Jungkook showed you to your office. It was in a quaint little room right next to Jungkook’s. It wasn’t overly exciting, but it was a huge step up from your cubicle, so you were extremely grateful for it.

It’s been two months and half a week since starting as Jungkook’s secretary, and you must say that man is undoubtedly a piece of work. You’ve seen his good moods, bad moods and you’re pretty sure you’ve heard him curse more than the average person, but not once have you complained. You liked it up here, and you’re sure Jungkook liked you here as well. You know you shouldn’t, but you kind of started liking him more than an assistant should like their boss. He was always so helpful to you, he took you home at night, even when you had transportation fair, he’d refuse to let you travel alone. He also had taken you out to eat a few times, as work colleagues of course but still, it was sorta a date. He always paid for your meals and would take you home afterward. Sometimes you’d invite him inside to grab a cup of coffee with you, but he’d always decline. He seemed to mentally brawl with himself about it. Thinking what’s the harm then remembering in just a few months, he’d be a happily married man. It kind of stung at the first few times but you learned your lesson and never asked him again. It was probably inappropriate anyway, and he just didn’t know how to let you down nicely.

the boss👨‍💼: hey u up? sent at 3.56 am

y/n: yea just waking up is there anything you need? sent at 4.20 am

the boss👨‍💼: mind if i come over? got some things to discuss with you if thats fine. sent at 4.23am

y/n: yes, thats fine ill get dressed and straighten up. see you soon sent at 4.25am

boss👨‍💼: see ya sent at 4.26am

You raced to get dressed and clean your living area as fast as you could. Jungkook didn’t live anywhere near you but what you knew about him was that he was most likely on his way 15 minutes ago, the text he sent was honestly just a heads up. You had about 5 minutes before he would show up at your door. Dashing from room to room you finish in record time and even had some time to make some of Jungkook’s favorite tea. While stirring in the sugar, you realize that this will be Jungkook’s very first time in your home. Your stomach drops, what if he doesn’t like the shithole of an apartment you have? God, what if thinks I live like a pig. You halt all movement when you hear the buzzer to your door. The particular buzzing sound meant Jungkook paged you to talk instead of buzzing for you to let him in your apartment building. You just figured he had accidentally pressed the wrong button, even though it says which is which you brush it off. Your apartment is on the first floor so it takes Jungkook no time to find your front door. He knocks, loudly might you add hell loud enough to wake the dead. The knocks were sloppy like he was scrapping his knuckles across the door with each rap. You were hesitant to open the door, maybe this wasn’t Jungkook and someone pretending to be him?

“Y/n,” Jungkook draws out, “please open the door.” He sounds slightly inebriated and a little agitated. You can’t say so for sure since you could not actually see him nor hear him clearly but something didn’t seem right.

You slowly open your door, peeking through you see half of Jungkook’s face and he’s as red as a tomato.

“There you are!” He exclaims, pretty much kicking your door open to wrap you in a tight bear hug. He’s got both arms around your waist and he’s hugging the life out of you. You struggle against his hold and eventually hit his shoulder with your balled fist to get him to let up. “Hey,” he giggles, ”that hurt.” He frowns but you can see the playfulness behind his eyes. You can’t help but wonder what the hell is going on with him. Is he actually drunk? And if he is why did he come here of all places? And did he fucking drive? Drunk??

“What are you doing here, Jungkook? It’s nearly 5 am?” You look at the invisible watch on your wrist and Jungkook watches, amused by you.

He doesn’t say anything for a while, just shrugs his shoulder and plops right on your couch.

“Mind if I stay the night?” He asks nonchalantly as if he’s done it a million and one times before.

It’s obvious as fuck he shouldn’t be driving but this nutcase shouldn’t be your responsibility at 5 am. “Do you want me to call your fiance? I can get her to pick you up if that’s what you want. I don’t think it’s appropriate that you stay here.” You thought he was coming over for work-related stuff, not to crash at yours like he’s some 21-year-old frat boy that just got his first taste of beer and pussy in the first night.

He looks at you like you have two heads and scoffs. “Na I’d rather stay here tonight, this couch seems comfy enough.”

You’ve never seen him act so childishly before. Yeah, he’s a jokester on his good days but a drunkard? That’s not Jungkook.

He bounces up and down on the couch to test its stability. “Got any extra blankets?” He mumbles. You sigh and grab two covers from the hall closet and throw them at him. He smiles one of the brightest smiles you’ve ever seen from him. If it wasn’t for the fact that he’d awoken you from your beauty sleep just so he could host his very own sleepover at your house, you would have returned one. You spin on your heels and to try to make a run for it before he asks for anything else but he yells for you again. “Turn the light off,” he says as he toes off his boots.

#bts #bts au #bts scenarios #bts drabbles #bts drabble #bts x reader #bts angst #bts fluff #bts jeongguk #bts jungkook #bts fic #bts smut #bts x reader smut #bts ceo au #bts smut angst #jungkook x reader #jeongguk #jeongguk x reader

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lucywithlupus · 5 years

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“When my loved ones tell me the sparkle in my eyes are back, even if it’s for a day; and on that day, I feel. I feel the things that have been missing, things I didn’t even realize weren’t there anymore.”— Courtenay Ambrose Living with a rheumatoid condition means that you are pretty familiar with the rise and fall of your health. We would wish to always stay up, but sometimes, we fall, and we fall hard. Hospitalizations or a recovery period at home can be daunting, traumatic experiences. They make you realize how in one second, your health could be at risk. Whether it is for excess inflammation, a serious damage of your joints, bones or muscles, organ failure or an infection that your body cannot get rid by itself, there are plenty of possible scenarios where you are placed back in that hospital bed for a few days, only to be sent back home and told to take a few (or many) days off. And I will admit, those days are some of the saddest I have experienced in my life. Coming back home was like an explosion of emotions: anger, happiness, sadness, confusion, fear, etc. Knowing that I would have to take things slow was devastating to me since all I wanted was to finally wipe off all memories of me being in that hospital bed. But not all hope was lost, and, for the first time in so long, I can finally say that I am getting better, and I will continue to get better every day. In this post, we will talk about what can you do during those recovery days and how can you heal yourself in the best way possible. I carefully thought about the things I did during these last three weeks of recovery, and how each of them was either a step forward or backward. You are not alone, and we can put you on the right track to sweet, healthy freedom! Without further ado, here we go: How to get better after a long recovery break? Tip 1: Eat The first three tips that I have to involve the Big Three: Food, Water and Sleep. We all need them, we cannot survive without them, and, in most cases, they are the only three tools your body will need to make you feel better. When I came back to the hospital, I was still trying to listen to my body and what it asked me to do. It was super hard to eat again after almost two weeks of nausea and irregular appetite, so even choosing what to eat was an important daily task. I would constantly ask myself: "am I ok? what do I need?" Note that when you're sick, sometimes what you need and what you won't get mixed up. You may want to eat a tub of ice cream, but maybe that won't help in your healing process. Both what you crave and what you actually end up eating are important. Inform your doctor on both of these: your appetite patterns will always be a key hint of how your organs and metabolism are doing. Now, about nausea: no one likes it. But you have to get through it.Foods with a bland taste and some texture to them like crackers, popcorn and toast made for great post-hospital-food snacks, while also not making me want to throw up. Chewing your food rather than drinking it in soups or smoothies also makes your body fuller for longer. Don't be surprised if you eat more or less than you normally do: just follow what your body is telling you to do! The trick is to be aware of what you are eating, chose healthy things most of the time and treat yourself every so often. This is no time for a strict diet: change your eating patterns according to your mood and hunger levels! Tip 2: Drink water Water, water, water! Drink water, all day, every day, nonstop. Being properly hydrated is the only way your body is going to heal itself. So if that wasn't on your 2019 resolutions list, write it down now. You still have 11 months to achieve master levels of water intake. Another tip: make sure you have good hygiene. Sometimes, it is hard to understand for others, but I can't step into the shower without fearing death by slip. It was worse when my hand still had an intravenous treatment happening, and I needed to protect my hand from water at all times. Being clean and tidy at all times does not only make you feel fresh and clean, but it also makes you feel more motivated to make your day right. So wash your face, clean your teeth, change out of those PJs: make sure every morning, you are ready to step out that door, even though you know that you may not go anywhere. It's small tweaks like this that make a huge difference! Tip 3: Sleep and Rest This should not come as a surprise to anyone, but sleep is probably what your body does more when its spending energy trying to heal you. Identify how does your body tells you it is tired and wants to sleep, and do not continue binge-watching Netflix just because you want to know what happens in the next episode. Sleep now. You'll thank me later. But obviously, you can't sleep all day. Resting other ways is just as important, but do rest mindfully. This is what I mean: you probably won't feel rested after that 45-minute Forntnite gameplay video, but probably you would by spending 10 minutes doing something else: listening to some music, coloring, playing an instrument, taking a walk. Surprisingly, I have found so many things that I can do to relax that I would not do before because I was too lazy to try them out! And for my fellow workaholics out there, understand that your body is not going to keep up with the same workload as before at first. That is perfectly normal and ok, and you should not feel guilty for that. If you really want to squeeze in some work, just zigzag your way between breaks and work and eventually, things will get done. Tip 4: Know your limits This ties in nicely with what I was saying before. Coincidence, I don't think so! I understand that finally being free of nurses and doctors telling you do lay down and rest makes you want to do the exact opposite when no one is watching. But the truth of the matter is: if you don't stop yourself, your body will, using its own painful, unpleasant ways. Take your time to heal, that's why you are here in the first place! Accept the fact that you cannot go to work/school/ university or college right now because you put yourself and others at risk. Try to do some tasks, but make sure you prioritize health and rest for now. Plus, let me spill on you some truth: It is not your fault you are in this situation. It never was and never will be. String-theory-wise, there are so many possible realities where you are in the hospital for so many different reasons beyond your illness, like a car crash or an armed robbery. In these realities, no one would dare tell you it was your fault you got hurt, so why now? Why now blame yourself and actually sabotage your healing with bad thoughts? So every time you feel guilty, alone or weak, just think of your day and what you accomplished today. Today you got up, brushed your teeth, put on some clothes, took your meds, etc. Slowly but surely, these little victories will matter and push you forward. Tip 5: Rebuild your space Imagine that you are a plane crash survivor, drifting in the ocean in a tiny lifesaving boat. Your house is like this boat: it protects you, but you also spend a heck of a long time in it. So the logical thing to do would be to make sure this tiny boat has all the things you need to survive: a rain collector, a weapon for fishing, some good wifi, etc. In other words, make sure your house is equipped and cozy enough for you to survive the long wait. Bring important things near your bed for what I call "drop everything" moments: basically, moments when you feel so bad, you just throw everything everywhere and toss yourself in bed, helpless and sad. Have essentials in your nightstand at all times: pills, water, thermometer, tissues, snacks, etc. These will save you during those "I can't get up" tragedies. Also, bring out things to keep you entertained throughout your stay. My room has never had so many books lying around. There are coloring pencils I haven't touched in so long which are now every day "grab and doodle" tool. I still cannot stay be separated from my headphones and fine tunes for long. You get the point. If you need something, do not be ashamed or afraid to ask for it. Call a friend, your parents, your family and let them know how they can help you! Tip 6: Try new things Imagine you are now at work or school, sitting in your desk, your mind wandering. These are the exact moments when you think: I could totally become a great dancer/ artist/ DJ/ chef if I had the time. I could totally start my own projects, read this book I want to read, learn more about this thing I love, etc. I could totally do all of those things, only if I had the time…. Well, knock knock, look who has arrived! Time has! This is the perfect time for you to try out all of the things you could not when you were too busy stuck in your routine. Do them now! Try some coloring, painting, yoga, that recipe you saw online but were too intimidated to do, that choreography that looked cool but challenging, that 1000-piece puzzle someone gave you but you just stashed away for another day. The world is your oyster, so go ahead! Tip 7: Have fun What better way to spend your time than catching up with the people you love and maybe haven't seen in a while!Meet up with your friends, text them often if they are far away, call them a few times. Do not think that you are wasting their time: if they are your friend when they want to hear how you are doing, how your health is doing, etc. Make sure you are being honest: as cliché as it sounds, sometimes its ok not be ok, and those moments of sadness and worry is exactly what talking to others is for. It is super important to understand that not everything has to be about feeling sorry for yourself for being sick. Not every single activity of your daily need to revolve around your current illness. You have to find ways to distract yourself from the situation you are experiencing right now, otherwise, you will, as we Spanish speakers say, drown yourself in a glass of water. Sometimes, your problems seem bigger than what they truly are, and it is in those times where fun and games should arrive to cheer you up. So enjoy your home: watch some Netflix, play video games, watch funny youtube videos, play some music and dance, etc. Tip 8: Take care of yourself Sadly, not everything is fun and games, and you must find the balance between responsibility and perfectly normal laziness. Take your medications, call the doctor if they are not working properly or have weird symptoms. If possible, keep a record of how you feel each day, what your symptoms are, go to your checkups, etc. Know when your body cannot go further, but also challenge yourself every so often. When you listen to your mind and soul carefully, you being to be more honest with yourself, about what you can and can't achieve at certain times. You will be surprised at how, in the most unexpected moments, you will be able to get out of bed with no back pain, you will be able to go down those stairs with no fear of falling, you will be able to not feel sick for a whole day, then days, then weeks, and so on. Always question yourself: do I avoid this because I might get hurt or do I push myself to try to overcome it? Am I ready yet, mentally and physically, to take that step forward? Tip 9: Have faith Whichever religion you practice, or whichever believes you have on the universe and our existence, faith is a universal entity that will be the one to keep you going even in the hardest of times. Take a moment to meditate, pray or just reflect on what you did and what you can do for yourself today. Those moments are just as important as any doctor's appointment or medicine. They bring you a sense of peace and love that no other thing can give you. Always be thankful for what you are and what you have. Be thankful for both the good times and the not so good ones. Not many people keep up with what you do, so be thankful that you have the strength and wits to make it happen. Tip 10: Prepare yourself for life after your recovery Staying healthy ain't easy after a recovery, especially when reality slaps you in the face when you get back to your routine. Before you even step out, make sure your environment is prepared to welcome you back. Call your teachers, boss, or college professors to let them know where you have been and why you could not come back sooner. They will surely understand and help you to readjust to your old working habits. Take the time to reflect on your goals and what you truly wish to achieve in life. Talking to others about said goals makes it more likely for them to become a reality! Have clear and genuine care for your well being. Being back to your old life doesn't mean that you will put your health to the side after all that work to get better! Do not be ashamed or afraid to speak about what you went through, how you are doing and how can others help you to get back out there. Take it easy! Not everything will be perfect at first, and that doesn't surprise me! There may be a few slips here and there, but going slow and steady will always make you win the race in the end. Believe in yourself: you have overcome so much! Keep going! I believe in you! Aaand that's all for today, folks! Next week, we will move on again to Wednesday's "What is…?" post, and another lifestyle post for Saturday/ Sunday. Sorry for being late this week! I had so many things going on with university, checkups, seeing my friends, etc. I hope you still enjoyed the post and hopefully, some of it will help you survive your next recovery break- if it were to happen, always be ready! Take care of yourself! Love you! Bye!

#lupus #lupuswarrior #systemic lupus erythematosus #recovery #hospital #inflammatory arthritis #types of arthritis #fibromyalgia #spoons #rheumatism #rheumatic #chronically ill #chronic pain #gouty arthritis

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whydontwe-fanfics · 6 years

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Vegan (J.M)

Description: When hearing Jonah and the guys mock your life choices, you try a change, but your body doesn't respond so well to it.

Request: could you possibly write one where y/n is a vegan and she hears the boys, including her bf (Jonah), making fun of her behind her back and she attempts to eat meat to try to fit in one night but ends up throwing up and getting really sick and you can go off from there

Warning(s): mockery of vegan lifestyles, swearing, the boys being assholes, angst

PSA: keep in mind this is fiction, I don't know the boys personally, but they're not actual assholes

Word Count: 2.5k

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You were always a vegan, since day one. Literally. Both of your parents have raised you in a vegan lifestyle since you were born.

You were ten when you had your first taste of actual bacon. Your friends went crazy when they found you've never had pork before and when invited to one of their homes, they peer pressured you into trying it, telling you that you'd love it and your parents would never have to know. So you did it.

And it was disgusting. You remember pretending to like it for the sake of your friends, but the chewy fat in your mouth felt foreign and inedible.

You went home crying that day, admitting to your parents' that you had eaten bacon within seconds of walking through the front door. Of course, you weren't punished and your parents wouldn't admit it until years later but they found the entire situation humorous.

Eight years later, and you haven't eaten a single slice of meat since. Your fifteen-year-old brother had given up being a vegan four years prior, but you quite liked the foods you ate.

Many people tend not to get it, which could be a pain when they repeatedly ask if you've ever eaten steak, chicken, duck, etc.

But Jonah had always understood it. Or so you thought.

"What the hell are vegan oatmeal cookies?" Zach asks as he pulls out a pack of said cookies from the cabinet.

"Exactly what they say," Daniel replies.

"I mean what the hell is in it? And who eats this crap?" He puts the pack back into the pantry before reaching for the Chips-Ahoys.

"Vegan stuff," Jonah shrugs. "I don't know, Y/N likes them."

"I forgot she was a vegan," Jack hums.

"You'd think she'd tell us with every breath," Zach says and the guys all let out small laughs at the overused joke.

"So what does she eat?" Corbyn asks.

"Vegan food, I don't fucking know," Jonah rolls his shoulders.

"Is she an 'I heart animals' vegan or an 'my body is a temple' vegan?" Zach rolls his eyes.

"Pretty sure both," Jonah laughs.

You stood in the hallway with your back to the wall, your arms crossed over your chest as you eavesdrop on the mockery going on in the kitchen. You feel your face heat up as you overhear the guys make fun of you, your own boyfriend apart of the teasing.

"I know plenty of healthy people who are healthy and aren't vegan," Corbyn mentions.

"Vegans just like the title," Jonah laughs and your frown deepens. Why was he saying all of this? Was this what he really thought all along? "It's very inconvenient, too."

"I couldn't imagine going to the market with a vegan," Corbyn further teases, making you feel even more self-conscious.

"How do people go without eating meat? I don't get it," Jack scratches his head.

"By simply not eating meat?" Daniel sarcastically replied. "It's her life choice, leave Y/N alone."

If anything you were shocked Daniel was the only one who defended you. You didn't want to cry, but you felt so embarrassed it was upsetting.

With watery eyes, you push yourself off of the wall and hurry back to Jonah's room, closing the door behind you and sitting on the edge of his bed with a heavy exhale.

You glance to the dried fruit on his desk that you had just been snacking on. With a huff you storm over and throw the bag away, turning your back to it just as Jonah walked through the door.

"Hey, we're leaving in a few minutes," he says, reaching for his sneakers before looking up at you and furrowing his eyebrows. "What's wrong? Were you crying?"

"Yeah-uhm, I hit my knee on the desk," you easily lie. "Just teared up."

"You alright?" He walks your way and kneels down to inspect your bare knee. You turn away quickly and head for your phone on the nightstand.

"I'm fine," you shrug. "Where are we going?"

"Some diner downtown," Jonah began to pull his shoes on while he stayed kneeling. "I checked, they have vegan choices."

You nearly wince at the mention, feeling small goosebumps rise on your skin. Was finding a place always a hassle because of you? Is this why he doesn't like you being a vegan? Is this what he meant when saying you weren't very convenient.

"Oh, thanks," you murmur, sliding your phone into your pocket.

"You sure you're alright? Anything bothering you?" He stands back up and wraps his arms around your waist from behind, pulling your back against his chest.

"I'm fine, Jonah," you fake a smile and squirm out of his grip before turning to face him. "Just hungry."

His furrowed eyebrows don't rest, but he inevitably complies and takes your hand in his.

As he leads you downstairs, you feel uneasiness poke at your ribs. You knew the guys didn't know you had heard them, but knowing that they had all been so rude about your decisions was embarrassing and unsettling. You grew to think that they didn't like or respect you.

"You guys heading out?" Jack asks once you guys get downstairs. You divert your eyes from him and shift uncomfortably as Jonah unlaced your hands and wraps that arm around your shoulder.

"Yeah, we'll be back in a bit," he declares.

The entire ride there, only one thought consumed your mind - Would it be too late to change? Maybe the first few bites won't taste good, but that's food being food and taste buds reacting. After a while, you'll get the hang of it and will be eating normal foods in a jiffy.

You grew determined in that thirty-minute ride, telling yourself that you'd just have to trick your mouth into enjoying the taste of pork chops or beef jerky. It couldn't be that hard?

"You've been real quiet back there, Babe," Jonah grasps your attention and you make temporary eye contact.

"Just tired," you shrug. "Could you drop me home after this?"

"Yeah, sure," he slightly frowned before looking back at the road.

You shift in your seat and nibble at your bottom lip as you pull into the parking lot of said restaurant.

"C'mere," Jonah pulled you into his arms right after you got out of the car, his chin resting on your head. "You're going to tell me what's wrong after we eat, okay?"

"There's nothing wrong, Jonah," you deny.

"Y/N," he sternly says. "You know you can tell me anything, right? I won't judge."

How ironic.

You find yourself scoffing on the inside as you pull away from him.

"Let's just go eat," you grumble, walking ahead and away, leaving him confused. He reluctantly follows you into the restaurant.

Your eyes rake the menu, a blanket of discomfort on you because now you're aware that Jonah will judge whatever you decide to put into your body.

When the waiter came around, you had decided not to get anything, claiming that you weren't hungry. When Jonah's food came, you just got a water.

"What if we order you something and you just take it home for later?" Jonah asks, pestering you about your decision on not choosing any of the food.

"I'm good, really," you assure him. "And if I'm hungry later, I'll just order something from post mates."

Jonah eyes you for a few seconds before shaking his head and turning back to the bacon burger and fries on his plate. Your stomach churned at the thought of eating that yourself as you eyed the meal down.

"You want a bite?" Jonah jokes, noticing your stare. You glance up at him with wide eyes.

"Really?"

"I was joking."

You furrow your eyebrows and glance back at his burger before grabbing a knife and cutting 1/3 of the patty.

He stares at you with genuine confusion as you bring the food to your lips and take a bite out of it hastily.

"Y/N, what the hell?" Jonah frowns. "You told me what happened last time you had bacon." He takes the remaining piece of burger out of your hand and places it on his plate. "Why would you do that?"

You don't pay much attention to his words as you feel the flavor of the meat fill your mouth, your jaw repeatedly moving because of how chewy the food was.

You tilt your head to the side at the taste. It wasn't nearly as bad as you had remembered, but it still was unusual.

"I just wanted to try it," you say as the mushiness finally goes down your throat.

Jonah eyed you down for a few seconds.

"What?"

"Was it good?"

"It wasn't that bad," you shrug. "Just not used to that kind of texture."

"So you liked it?"

"No, not at all," you find yourself saying honestly. "But I could get used to it." You grab the remaining piece back from Jonah's plate and put it into your mouth, slightly grimacing.

"Don't force yourself to eat it."

"I'm not," you detest.

"Yes, you are," he argues.

"No, I'm not, Jonah, for Christ's sake," you can't help but snap. A sigh leaves your mouth as you turn your attention to your phone, ignoring his confusion-filled eyes.

It didn't take long for his to request for a styrofoam box and the check, meaning he was ready and so were you.

You both silently head to his car and the tension doesn't die when he begins driving.

It's nearly six minutes after you guys have left the restaurant when Jonah decided to speak up.

"You gonna finally tell me what the hell is up or are you gonna just keep ignoring me?"

You roll your eyes just as a feeling of nausea passed over you.

"Hello?" He calls.

You place your hands on your stomach at the feeling of contents moving around unusually.

"Pull over," you mutter.

"What? No-"

"Just pull over!" You nearly yell and he swerved to the side of the deserted road. You quickly opened the door and rushed out of the car, placing both hands on your knees and throwing up on the side of the street.

Jonah grows himself out of the driver's seat and rushes to your aid, pulling your hair back and rubbing your back.

"Shit," he murmurs as your vomit falls from your mouth on three different occasions, small pauses between the vile feeling. Your eyes watered when it was finally over and you heaved, wiping your mouth with the sleeve of your sweatshirt. "Babe-"

"I just want to go home," you nearly whimpered and his heart fell.

"C'mon," he says in a hushed tone, leading you back into the car and kneeling beside you after you sit down. He places his palm on one side of your face, the frown on his face never subsiding. "It was the meat, wasn't it?"

You merely shrug, not looking him in the eye as the sick feeling doesn't disperse.

"Y/N, why'd you eat it when you knew this would happen?"

"I just wanted to be normal," you finally murmur.

"What? You are normal," he says incredulously. "Why wouldn't you be normal!"

"Because me being a vegan isn't convenient," you huff, finally making eye contact with him. He still looks confused for a brief moment before realization washed over him, his eyes widening.

"Why-why would you say that?"

"Why would you say that?" Your voice cracks. "Is me being a vegan that bad for you?"

"No, no it isn't. It never has," he shakes his head. "I don't know why I said that; I was caught up in the moment with the guys and-"

"You didn't defend me," you felt a tear fall and instantly reached up to wipe it away just before another one was released. "Daniel's the only one who stood up for me while my boyfriend was making fun of me."

"I'm sorry," his face fell. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know how bad it was," he gestured to the vile contents on the side of the road.

"It was embarrassing enough being made fun of by the guys, but you? I would've thought you out of everyone there wouldn't join along," you frown.

"You have no idea how sorry I am," he whispers. "I was- I am a jerk, I shouldn't have said any of those things, I didn't mean it."

"It sounded like you did," you protest but he shakes his head.

"Y/N, I love you and your vegan choices."

"I don't want you lying to me."

"I'm not lying," he deadpanned. "Earlier, everything I said was because I was being an asshole and in the moment I thought more of the laughs than your feelings whether I didn't know you had been listening or not."

You remain quiet, closing your eyes as the sickness built up in your stomach, causing you to grasp at your torso in discomfort. Jonah's face fell and he let out a small sigh.

"The guys are going to apologize to you and I'll do it a hundred more times if I have to," he declares. "Just never do something that would hurt you just because of what I or anyone else says... Is that why you were crying earlier?”

"I thought I could grow used to change and show you guys-" you heave, cutting yourself off.

"You don't need to change because we're jerks," he sighed. "I'm sorry that you had to hear that, God, Y/N, I really am."

You merely nod, not opening your mouth because you feel that the second you do, the urge to hurl will increase.

"I'll take you back to your place so you can rest," he finally concludes, changing his mind. "But I'm not leaving until you feel better."

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i would not have forgiven him so easily, but for the sake of keeping the word count under 3k and happy endings, here you go!! // also didn't know how to end it so the last paragraph is halfassed

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Masterlist | Talk to Me

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Tag List: @maddie-leighhh @my-otpkilledme @heyowdw @duh-danii @thefangirlingmaster @lyssaholic @prettylittlesheerio @jackaverysboo @lilheavfuhyobih @babyybesson @guadalupeguac @sunshineavery @melodramonica @jackaverybabe @lovableherron @adoring-avery @deni-gonzalez @ciariamarie27

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josieswrk · 4 years

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This week’s episode of Fruits Basket was another crier. Near the end of the episode, the main character Tohru has a nightmare of the morning her mother died. In her dream, she is sleeping, and her mother tells her quietly that she’s leaving for the day. As Tohru watches her mother walk toward the front door in her mind, she begs her mom to stay home. She knows that if her mom leaves the house that day, her mother will die. But no matter how much Tohru pleads, the silhouette of her mother makes its way, step by step, undeterred, out the front door, which closes with finality behind her.

The episode ends with a voiceover of Rin’s thoughts as she sits on a hospital bed, eating some jelly that Tohru had made for her:

“You hide what lies beyond the door from all others, where you feel like you’re silently ending towards... a breaking point. If that happens, you can’t recover. I hope someone like him will come for her [Tohru] too. Just like Haru was there for me, someone who will gently open the door. You can’t help but yearn for someone like that. Because someone who knows how scary it is to be alone... [cut to Tohru waking up from her nightmare and opening her bedroom door] can’t help but to love others.”

Last week I wrote about how Rin is overlooked because she isn’t as obviously kind, and how Tohru and Haru were able to see Rin’s wounded-ness and love her deeply. This week, we see the love come full circle as Rin decides to stop pushing Tohru’s kindness away and trust her, even starting to love her in return. The two women are able to develop a deeper bond because they recognize the pain that the other is going through. Tohru saw through Rin’s vitriol and sharpness, recognizing that Rin’s wounds run unbearably deep, and embraced her in a warm hug. This week, Rin begins to see through Tohru’s cheerfulness and kindness, and recognizes that, underneath Tohru’s smiles is an unspeakable grief that would leave most people paralyzed. It’s a grief we are reminded of through Tohru’s nightmare, and a burden that Rin hopes that Tohru will not have to bear alone, that someone like Haru will be there for Tohru, to “gently open the door.”

I think I replayed the ending five times. Rin’s poetic dialogue overlaying the scenes of Tohru’s darkest nightmare, Tohru’s soulless gaze as she wakes up and stares out her bedroom door, as if in her half-asleep state she could catch the disappearing form of her mother... I think moments like these are what takes a charming story about high school romance and magical animal transformations and makes it into something you want to cherish forever and ever.

I wasn’t even planning to write about Fruits Basket again today. I was going to write about the feeling of coming home to my apartment after staying over at a friend’s house last night (which is why I haven’t posted anything in a while). But I watched the next episode in the meantime and needed to process, hehe, so here we are.

Coming home after an absence is one of my favorite feelings. I love my friends dearly and enjoy spending time with them, but there is usually a limit. Like today. I had *so* much fun with some of my favorite people this week, culminating in sleeping over at a friend’s house last night. At around noon today, two of my friends were going to spend the rest of the day together, but I felt it deeply in my body: I am tired, and I would like to go home. My lovely friends are all so empathetic about my limited social energy and don’t give me a hard time about it or take it personally (because it isn’t something to be taken personally! Even if I love you very much I need time to myself.) After announcing my desire to go home, my friend dropped me off, I ran a couple errands, then came home again, took a shower, changed into my comfy clothes and just about squealed with joy. Like snuggled into my comfy area and screamed because I was so happy.

I’m constantly thinking about how I use my time. The days are evil, my life is short, and I want to maximize the way I spend my hours. And this doesn’t mean I’m a workaholic or I refuse to sleep, because I strongly believe things like play, sleep, and daydreaming help make life worthwhile, if done in balance and moderation. And that’s what I think a lot about. What is the best ratio of work to play? Play gives me joy, but so does rigorous work. How about spending time with people vs. spending time alone? It takes time, energy, and presence to build meaningful relationships, and yet I can’t spend my entire life hopping from hangout to hangout and never leaving time for myself. There isn’t really a “right” answer to these questions, and much of it is moot, anyway, since I’m not the one with full control over my life and time - God is. I can come up with the most perfect schedule and it might work on most days, but at some point it will have to change. I can also say f*ck it I’m going to do whatever I feel like doing, and I will be left feeling lost and depleted and searching for something consistent and meaningful.

But to the extent that I can be intentional about my life and set boundaries, I was reflecting today that I want to continue fiercely protecting the time I spend alone at home. The more I stay at home, the more quiet time I have to read. The more I read (manga, novels, etc.), the more I feel the contemplative, imaginative side of myself developing. When it comes to anime, I usually default to watching instead of reading the manga because I’m lazy. :p But recently I’ve been picking up reading manga again (starting with sangatsu no lion after a friend recommended it to me & I ran out of anime episodes and needed to find out what happens after!), and something you get in manga that you don’t get in anime is the author’s reflections. Many times, authors will draw themselves (or bespectacled animal versions of themselves) into the pages of the manga and give updates about their life and work. I love this aspect of manga, because to me, reading is a form of socialization. Sure, I’m not having a conversation with someone embodied. But when I am reading, I am absolutely connecting to another person’s mind and soul. When I read Pachinko, I’m falling in love with the characters, but I’m also falling in love with the author, Min Jin Lee, because through her story I can see her values of humanizing empathy, of empowering love, and of the courage to live according to one’s values. When I watch Fruits Basket I am curiously enthralled by the emotional intelligence and sensibilities of Takaya. And when I read March Comes in Like a Lion, I get glimpses into Chica Umino’s life experiences, and I feel a kindred spirit. In one of the author’s asides, she talks about exploring Ginza on her own in the evenings, getting late night food, which reminded me of the many times I wandered the streets of Seoul and London alone, popping in to restaurants and cafes that piqued my interest. I also imagine Chica Umino spending long, quiet hours at her desk, drawing and creating the warm, larger than life world of Kiriyama and his friends. And I wonder... Would life really be all that lonely if I did the same? If I stayed forever in my house and created something that would warm the hearts of whoever chanced upon it? And that’s something that would give me so much joy... To give someone a hug through my work the way Takaya and Chica Umino have hugged me through theirs.

In reality it would probably be difficult for me to completely become a hermit because I really do love the flesh and blood people in my life, and I don’t want to lose my grip on my surroundings. But lately I feel my heart being pulled home, where I can roll myself into my blankets like a burrito and not have to utter a single word aloud. And maybe... After almost 8 years of on and off procrastination, I will finally finish that novel.

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vannahinjapan · 7 years

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School Festival

This is gonna be a long one. I’m going to try to recall all the events of both days of school festival.

God I wish I had a camera.

The first day (Saturday) was sports festival. I wasn’t really sure what time to show up. They handed out a schedule (all in Japanese) that started at 6 am, but I was pretty sure that was ridiculous and we didn’t have to be there that early. I couldn’t read what it said but the morning teacher’s meeting was listed at 7:50~8:00 so I just went to that.

I don’t understand most of what’s being said in the teacher’s meetings. It’s all educational jargon and they speak it pretty fast. And then after the meeting they all quickly disperse, I assume to the classrooms where they’ll round up the students.

So I’m often left alone in the teacher’s room with not much to do. And Saturday was no different so I just kind of sat there waiting for the teacher’s to come back. They didn’t really so eventually I wandered outside as parents of students were coming in the gate and finding seats outside. They had the whole field roped off and with several big tents and chairs set up. I sat on the ground for a while just watching people shuffle in until I had to go to the bathroom.

They had closed the front gates so I couldn’t go in that way anymore, so I wandered around the side of the school looking for a place to go in and ran into the two school nurses who let me go in through their room. Then I sat with them for the entire morning part.

There were about an hour of announcements and opening statements and students speaking, vice principal speaking, principal speaking. When it finally started the students were broken up by grade and had relay races and tug-of-war and all that typical sports day stuff.

I was sitting far away so I couldn’t see the individual students, and every single class would have the same tug-of-war or relay race or whatever, so we had to watch every event be done several times. That along with the heat made me almost fall asleep in my chair.

I would have liked to been closer but I knew going up to where the parents were would warrant a ton of staring at me, and I the student and teacher sections were huge and vast and overflowing so I didn’t even want to try to figure out how that worked.

Eventually one of the teachers came up to me and told me the teacher’s 3-legged race was after lunch (I was told I’d be participating). And she told me it was lunch time so I went inside and there were neat little bento boxes sitting on all of the teacher’s desks. They were pretty good, standard Japanese food. As I was eating, the other teacher’s came in and grabbed theirs and immediately left. Maybe to their classrooms to eat with the kids? I don’t really know. I never know.

And after I finished I tried to find my way through the maze of tents and found a place to sit there. The 3-legged race was fun; I ran as fast as I could but then realized I haven’t done aerobic exercise in over two months and my legs and abs started punishing me.

After that I just sort of sat under the tents and watched the kids do various races. There’s so many kids.

And I had a brief conversation with the lunch ladies. Just small talk like where I’m from and about Yamanashi.

Afterward I helped a bunch of volunteers (I think they were parents and PTA members) take down the tents and tie up the metal poles and haul them into the back of these little trucks (similar to gaters).

Got a little sunburn on my face. It was on ok day.

-----------------------------------------

TODAY:

Today I showed up to work in a t-shirt and khakis because when I asked yesterday what I should wear today I was told, “someting normal that doesn’t stand out too much”.

So...I thought normal clothes meant...casual? Right? But when I got there everyone was wearing black slacks, belts, and white colored shirts tucked in. Looked pretty dressy to me. Even dressier than they usually are.

But no one said anything or seemed to care at all really. In fact the entire day I was just kind of left to my own devices.

The teachers all left after the morning meeting to go to their homerooms as usual, so I didn’t think there was anything unusual about me sitting in the teacher’s room alone.

But after an hour past I was wondering when things were going to start. I didn’t know at all what to expect. Would it take place outside? The schedule said the opening ceremony was in the gym at 8:40.

I didn’t know if the teachers were going to come back before then? Or just go straight to it? No one came back so I peaked out to the gym at 8:35 and saw it full of people and like it had already started. So then I didn’t want to walk in late so I just waited. The op ceremony was supposed to end at 9 according to the schedule. But at 9 nothing happened and no one came back. So I sat on my computer some more and finally I just got up and went to the gym and decided to walk in late anyway.

Well it wasn’t at all as formal as I had imagined it would be. There were just family members scattered all over the back of the gym and walking in late was not a problem at all. I probably wouldn’t have been noticed if I were Japanese, but being foreign of course everyone stared at me.

I didn’t really know where I was supposed to stand and I didn’t want to walk in front of people so I just kind of awkwardly stood in the back. I couldn’t see the stage very well but the brass band was playing. After that was the First year student’s presentation, which was an hour long alice-and-wonderland knock off type skit. I couldn’t make out what they were saying over the bad audio and being in the back of the gym, but people were laughing so I guess it was funny.

The gym was packed with people and by that time the heat was suffocating so I went outside to sit for a bit, which is extremely annoying to do because everytime you leave the gym you have to change into a different pair of shoes.

I came back in and watched the second years performance, which was mostly them dancing to hip hop and other things. Then at the end they put on a video where a girl was doing a fake newscasting and they had a clip of Trump and a clip of Abe. I couldn’t tell what anyone was saying but they were making jokes about it and about the missiles. Wish I was more fluent.

Then they launched into a presentation about war and what life was like for middle schoolers during the war. Bit of a tone problem.

After that was lunch and I was relieved because I’d been standing for 3 hours in a sweltering hot gym with tons of people constantly glancing over at me or looking back at me or whispering to someone while looking at me. It shouldnt affect me at all, and I know that. But it does. Not necessarily in a bad way; it’s just exhausting constantly being in a spotlight.

Went back to teacher’s room, had lunch out of my little bento alone (the teachers were gone off again), and then wandered upstairs to look at the different classes presentations.

Anime has led me to believe that school festivals are much more interesting than they actually are. There were no maid cafes, haunted houses, snacks, music performances, or anything like that. They just had some of their artwork on the walls as well as little essays they had written or calligraphy they had done.

I walked around and looked at all that before going back to the gym for the 3rd year students’ presentation. It was mostly hip hop dancing. And they sang a song and then made some comments about graduating and moving on to high school.

For the second half I sat next to some first year boys. I tried to talk with them and play with them but they just shouted some random things in English and then ignored me, so I gave up and just sat there for the rest of the time.

And then there was an hour’s worth of closing ceremony remarks. And then another hour of me wandering around the school unsure of what to do. Trying to help them clean up but discovering everyone’s already got it under control. Walking back to the teacher’s room and sitting for about 20 minutes doing nothing. Walking back around the school to see if there’s something I can do. Seeing no one. Walking back to the teacher’s room.

This continued for about an hour until I finally decided to ask the only two people sitting in the teacher’s room, “Excuse me. Is there going to be a closing teacher’s meeting today?” and “Is there anything for me to do?”

They seemed confused by the question and ended up telling me the other teachers were “on patrol” and that I could go outside and sit by the gate until all the students left. So I did an there were other teachers outside having conversations I didn’t understand. I waited.

At one point I went outside and talked to these three students. They had me judge which one of them had better english pronunciation by saying “Hello” to me. It was a short conversation and I didn’t really know what to talk about. And I might as well have been Johnny Depp because they were shy and giggling the whole time. But they were really cute. It wasn’t much but its probably the longest conversation I’ve had with any of my students at this point.

Then everyone started walking toward the entrance so I did too. I went inside and all the teachers had returned and they had their closing meeting, talking about how things went and what to do next time and what to do Tuesday, etc.

And after that was done I figured I should be able to go home. Even the schedule said at 4:20 everyone was supposed to be off campus. It was 5:15.

And after the meeting ended all the teachers just stayed in the teachers room talking in groups. I couldn’t tell if it was business or just conversation but no one seemed to be leaving at all. And I don’t want to be that one foreigner who just leaves immediately at their contracted time (which is 4:30).

So I waited. I read some of a book. I waited some more. Until finally someone came over and told me that the meeting was over so I could go home.

Good to know.

So....I just came home with a strong feeling of isolation and discouragement that I haven’t made meaningful connections with my coworkers, my students are either uninterested in me or are afraid to open up to me, and the other JETs have all rejected my invitations to go places. I’ve stopped inviting people out of discouragement. I don’t want to be that person that can’t take a hint.

I just keep asking myself why its so hard for me to connect with people? And why I’m so exhausted just by being around people? And If I have such a problem with people, am I really doing the right job?

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connorrenwick · 5 years

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Where I Work: Rachel Smith of & SMITH

Rachel Smith is partner of London-based creative agency & SMITH, a firm she co-founded with Dan Bernstein in 2007. & SMITH specializes in branding for hotels, food, and drink, working with companies like Liberty London, LUX* Resorts, Yo! Sushi, Dishoom, Shake Shack, and Ikor Resorts, to name a few. The team works out of their Stoke Newington studio, a light-filled space that’s acts as a white canvas for colorful artwork, plants, and creative ideas. For this month’s Where I Work, Rachel takes us inside to see the agency’s workspace while sharing about her work process.

What’s your studio/work environment like?

Our studio used to be a piano factory, so we have amazing light, huge windows, and very high ceilings. It’s in residential Stoke Newington, a pretty peaceful part of the world and we’re close to a beautiful park and the best local shop in London, I’ve just had a great ice lolly from there. After a good Friday tidy the studio can look pretty cool – but most of the time it’s a very ‘lived in’ space.

How is your space organized/arranged?

We have one long bank of desks, where most people sit. My business partner Dan and I used to be there, too, but we got evicted when the studio got a little larger a few years ago. We now hop between ‘the cave’ (our small meeting room), our main table, next to a designer, out and about, or at home.

How long have you been in this space? Where did you work before that?

Around 6 years. When Dan and I set up in 2008 we were in a small shipping container in Shadwell with a walk outside to get to the sink and toilets. This was definitely a step up for us, and we were so happy to get this space. At the time most of our staff lived within walking difference, which was a big plus.

If you could change something about your workspace, what would it be?

Eating lunch together is one of my favourite things, so maybe a slightly larger communal table. We can all squeeze round – but it can get friendly! I’ve come up with a few terrible ideas over the years on how to extend it – but it thankfully never happens. We do need one more meeting room, oh and a sofa to have a nap on would be nice. I used to nap on a sofa in our old studio in my ‘post working from home’ days.

Is there an office pet?

Nope, I’m not an animal person, I think I’m missing a gene, or I have a pebble for a heart. My studio mostly loves animals though – so I have said if anyone wants a dog, they can bring it in – but they don’t think I’m serious. They’re probably right, so they’ve made friends with a few local cats instead.

Do you require music in the background? If so, who are some favorites?

Yes, we love music in the studio. Our Studio Manager Aimee is a DJ, so she’s mainly responsible for our daily listening. She describes it as a mixture of ‘Soul, R&B, Yacht Rock, Disco and 90’s Nostalgia with a peppering of the 6 Music playlist’.

If it’s left to me, it’s 80/90’s pop, a power ballad or two and some 90’s hip hop classics – I’m very content being stuck in time. A studio classic is Private Dancer by Tina Turner for a Friday end of day, get it up nice and loud to finish the week. I also like to kick projects off with a relevant tune to get the team in the mood, although that did result in Christmas tunes on the hottest day of the year recently. Sorry Sam.

How do you record ideas?

I love an iPhone note or photograph. My iPhone and I are very good friends. It’s either that or any random bit of paper on my desk, which I then usually lose. I’m very messy.

Do you have an inspiration board? What’s on it right now?

We have three inspiration places in the studio, one for magazines, one for general inspiration and one place where Aimee puts up which is new and interesting places to eat, drink, or sleep. On it right now… see above!

What is your typical work style?

At the moment, it’s a bit tightly packed. I had a baby last year so I’m still working on the best work/life balance. I used to only work in the office and enjoyed home being a work-free place. In general, I’m always better much later in the day. We have flextime at work so you can be an early bird or a late worker, and the hours can adapt to suit you.

What is your creative process and/or creative workflow like? Does it change every project or do you keep it the same?

The key to starting every project is spending time with a client, experience the brand and carefully listen to what they are trying to do. No project can start without this.

After that it’s flexible depending on the project and team size. Ideally, we’d have full project briefing all together, then we like to physically immerse ourselves in the world (getting as much eating, sleeping, and drinking done as possible). Sometimes we have a focused team on a creative project for 48 hours – with no distractions.

There’s a midway crit and a presentation at the end to rest of the team. This is way before it gets anywhere near the client.

What kind of art/design/objects might you have scattered about the space?

We probably should have a few more. We have a cool Supermundane mural that he painted for us when we moved in. Oh, and I like our lightbulb Disco sign too, and a large female figure cut out of an illustration we did for a recent project.

Are there tools and/or machinery in your space?

There’s a large walk-in cupboard which has all of our cutting/mock-up equipment in, masking tape, spray mount, rulers, scalpels, etc. Our machinery is just our printer.

What tool(s) do you most enjoy using in the design process?

Scissors, paper, and a nice fat pen. Getting early ideas up on the board and getting busy with some scissors, pens, paper always feels good.

Let’s talk about how you’re wired. Tell us about your tech arsenal/devices.

Just lots and lots of Macs, a mammoth server, and a goliath phone system – all technical terms.

What design software do you use, if any, and for what?

We use InDesign mainly, then Illustrator, Photoshop, After Effects, Sketch, Pages, Numbers, and our trusty steeds Slack and Streamtime. Slack Attack has well and truly hit our studio in the last year.

What’s on your desk right now?

Normally a load of paper, full up A4 Moleskines, and old status reports/quotes plus a few random pens and my 20-year-old calculator that I stole from Pentagram – that calculator and I have seen some good and bad times. But, let’s be honest, I tidied a little for the shoot so you can now see some nice books and a clear desk. Use your imagination to make this look a lot messier.

LUX*

Dishoom

Is there a favorite project/piece you’ve worked on?

Next year’s projects?! If I had to pick a few past projects, I think LUX* Hotels and Resorts work for the sector challenging ideas and our Art Direction work. Then Dishoom for seeing a project start authentically and getting on board with that journey early on with a strong focus on typography. It’s great to have seen Dishoom grow. Nothing is better than being given license to do great work for someone but then seeing the way that comes to life with the rest of the team’s hard work.

Tell us about a current project you’re working on. What was the inspiration behind it?

We’re working on a really exciting vegan ice cream brand at the moment. I can’t talk about the inspiration yet (as I’d have to kill you) but I’ve loved finding out more about that and also how people shop in the frozen aisle. We throw ourselves into each world and learn so much, this can then influence every project that follows in unexpected ways.

Do you have anything in your home that you’ve designed/created?

Look Up Pin badges and cards for my husband’s print company, a screenprint from one of his events, and a chair covered in my mate’s amazing Marwood fabric – but let’s be honest, I hardly designed this one. I bought the fabric, found the chair, and paid someone else to cover it!

I have many hopes for our house, painting ceilings bright yellow, walls in the garden a Yves Klein Blue, a sculptural polystyrene wall above the stairs, or a Sol Le Witt/Emma Kunz inspired coloured pencil wall mural. But alas, I have no time right now – so these things will all have to wait.

via http://design-milk.com/

from WordPress https://connorrenwickblog.wordpress.com/2019/09/24/where-i-work-rachel-smith-of-smith/

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etherealxch · 5 years

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because you’re here

word count : 2077

[a/n] : a rocky scenario this time! i was feeling pretty down when i was writing this because it was kinda based off my current situation. anyway rocky’s been creeping his way up my bias list sorry not sorry . hope you guys have fun reading this! and i hate to be that fan but AROHAS!! DON’T forget to vote for ASTRO on MUSIC SHOWS ETC! AND KEEP STREAMING ALL NIGHT!

I look at the laptop screen in front of me, the light from it bouncing off my face. It’s open to one single window, displaying my e-mail inbox. The first message from the top is blue, still unread. My finger hovers uncertainly over the mouse, then finally with some courage, click into it.

‘Dear Miss Ong, we would like to thank you for considering our company Unfortunately, we regret to say…’

My shoulder slumps down in defeat. This was never going to go well, was it? I sigh, rubbing my face suddenly exhausted. I take in deep breaths because I don’t want to be suddenly breaking down in tears in the public library.

I log off my email account and lean back against my chair. This was the fourth time I’ve tried to apply for a job this month and also the fourth time I’ve been kindly rejected. Either they don’t need anyone at this moment, or I don’t have enough qualifications, or I’m just too 'good’ for their company and I shouldn’t waste my talents at such a small company.

I hold and release my knuckles, holding them tight till they’re white and stretching them wide when I release them. It helps me stop wanting to cry. I gather up my things, pushing back my chair to leave. As I’m walking past the librarian’s desk, my phone gives a shrill ring and I realise I forgot to turn my phone on silent when I came in here.

“Hello?” I ask, slightly breathless as I hurry down the steps outside.

“Hey,” Rocky’s voice comes down on the line. Hearing his voice makes me immediately want to vent to him. But I know he’s working at the architecture firm right now and since it’s his lunchtime, I don’t want to steal any more of his free time unless I really need to.

“What are you up to right now?” He asks.

I imagine him, leaning against the window by his desk, phone by his ear. “Just left the library. You?”

“I’ve been working on a new project this entire morning with Myeong Jun and the others.” He stifles a yawn. “It’s been pretty hectic lately. I’ve barely seen you.”

“I miss you.” I sigh.

“I miss you too. I–”

'Rocky! I need you to come look at this!’ I can hear Myeong Jun’s voice calling out.

“Be right there!” Rocky shouts back. He turns his attention back to me. “Sorry, that was Myeong Jun. This new client of us is seriously a pain in the–”

“No, it’s okay.” I cut him off gently. “Go do your work.”

“I’ll call you tonight, is that okay?” He asks. I can’t help but smile, four months into our relationship, he still always asks before calling me.

“Yes.” I laugh. Talking to him, my spirits have momentarily been lifted, but once he’s not there to distract me, my wanders to my rejected job applications. My stomach growls, telling me it’s hungry. I walk to a bakery near the library to buy a sandwich, since I’m not in the mood for a proper lunch.

As I look over the two selections of sandwiches–chicken teriyaki and tuna mayo–, someone taps me on my shoulder.

“Liv! I thought that was you!” My old classmate whom I haven’t seen in a while, Fiona smiles.

“Fiona–hi!” I say, unable to hide the surprise in my voice.

“I haven’t seen you since high school! What are you up to these days?” She asks, as we take a seat outside the bakery. I take a sip of my juice, taking my time to answer her.

“Umm, not much. I’ve been trying to look for a job.” I stir my straw around my overpriced drink. The ice spheres clink gently against the glass, the mint leaves sticking to the sides.

“Any luck?” She asks. Gloomily, I shake my head.

“What about you?” I move away from the subject of me continuously failing to get a job. She tells me about how she’s working for a pharmaceutical company and she’s now on their research team. I smile, telling her that’s great since I know that’s what she’s always wanted. But I can’t help feeling bitter in the pit of my stomach. She must notice a change in my mood because she pats my back and tells me that I will eventually find a job that it’s better to take my time and filter out the good jobs instead of just rushing into things.

“Thanks.” I don’t tell her that I can’t even filter out any jobs because there are no jobs.

I reach home about 3 in the afternoon, with a bag of groceries that I had gotten on my home. Buying groceries is my way of saying thank you to my roommate, Ae Ra is who letting me stay here for only half the rent. Without her, I’d be homeless. I check my e-mail to see if there is anyone who needs my translating service. Freelance translating jobs are my only sole income now. The pay is great but since I only have a degree, there are only so many documents I am qualified to translate. And nowadays, most people use the internet for these things.

Ae Ra sends me text saying she’ll be late tonight. She’s probably meeting up with her boyfriend. I sigh, just when I need some company. I think of my boyfriend who’s been stuck at work almost every night since the last two weeks. We’ve mostly video called when he’s off work, lying in our respective beds, talking about literally anything until either one of us falls asleep first.

But I miss him. I want to see his face. And have him tell me everything’s going to be fine. I shake my head, telling myself no.

“He needs to rest too.” I tell myself firmly. I take a shower, washing my hair that’s been greasy for three days because I was so nervous about hearing from the company that I was incapable of keeping up with my personal hygiene. The sun sets pretty early these days so when I’m done with blow drying my hair, the sky is looking dusty rose with streaks of dark greyish lavender clouds. This has become my favourite time of the day.

I open the balcony sliding door and with a mug of tea in my hands, I settle on one of the lounge seats outside, shaped like a half-opened egg with a cushion for my butt. I lean back comfortably, staring at the sky and hearing the sounds from the neighbourhood–a couple of housewives talking about the prices for fish and poultry these days, students complaining and laughing together, the sound of a construction lorry reversing with someone directing the driver.

Around 6:23 p.m. I realise I’m starving and cook up a quick dinner. It says 15 minute meal on the YouTube video but what they don’t tell you is that it takes about another 12 minutes to look for ingredients and have them ready, a 10 to wonder if I should’ve put that much soy sauce in the soup. Over dinner, I scroll through my email inbox again, coming across the email telling me that I didn’t get the job again.

My gut tightens and all of a sudden, my faces scrunches up and big fat tears are rolling down my face. I think of how Fiona basically got her dream job and that increases my sadness. I try calming myself down.

“Hgnnnh, it’s okay, hgnh hmmghh,” I sob. “It’s not like you’re hgnh, completely out of a job. You have, a, a, freelahggnhh…” The thought of how unstable freelance work is only makes me cry harder. I move from the kitchen to the living room in a state of half-sobbing and half feeling sorry myself. I let myself cry, because I’ve been telling myself that no one owes me anything and that I need to work hard by myself and this is only a small trip on my way to success and I’ve always held back then, never once crying.

The doorbell rings and I use my sleeve to wipe away my stray tears and snot. Dammit. Did Ae Ra order something online again? I open the door to a red and white takeout box covering my boyfriend’s face. He pops out from the side, about to say 'SURPRISE’ when he catches sight of my face.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Is everything okay?” He immediately drops his jokey act.

My chin wobbles a little but I suck it in, not wanting to go through the ugly crying in front of him. Instead, I take a step forward and hug him, wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my face in his chest. His familiar scent seems to calm me down.

“Just let me be like this for a sec.” I mumble into his clothes. With his one free hand, he puts it on the top of my head, patting it gently as you would to a child.

“Um, should we go inside?” He asks, as one of the neighbours gives us a weird look as he opens his door.

“Do you want to tell me what’s wrong?” He asks, once we’re inside. He sets the food on the table and follows me to the living room, where I plop down on the couch.

“You haven’t eaten dinner?” I ask, avoiding his question.

“No, I wanted to eat with you but I guess I should’ve called first huh?” He gives one of his smiles where the left corner of his lips is raised slightly, glancing at the kitchen counter where my pot in sitting, unwashed.

“Sorry.” I say meekly. He takes my hand, and even though it’s been countless times since he’s done that, my heart still does that skippy thing.

“It doesn’t matter.” He pushes back my hair that’s covering part of my face gently. I look at him properly, his black hair is getting long; it’s almost going into his eyes.

“I didn’t get the job.” I say, my voice small. “I just. I thought that this would be the job. Everyone around me is doing something with their life. I’m still stuck here, where I’ve been ever since I’ve graduated.”

He pulls me in for a cuddle, not saying anything. And I appreciate that. Because he knows that no matter what he says now, I’m inconsolable. He lets me vent to him, which I do. I tell him about Fiona and her job. He listens, his face serious and attentive. He uses his thumb to wipe away a stray tear on my cheek when I get too emotional again.

After I’m done talking, I lean into the crook of his arm comfortably and he rests his chin on the top of my head. This action is simple really yet I’ve always considered this an intimate action between couples. It makes me feel very warmed and loved inside.

“I know that, no matter what I say now, it’s not going to be able to change how you feel.” He pulls away slightly so he can look into my eyes. “But I just want you to know, it’ll be alright, okay?” He presses his lips to my forehead.

“Thank you for coming.” I say.

“I’m glad I came when I did.” He cups the side of my face and smushes my cheeks together, making me laugh. “You know you can always call me right?”

“I know,” I nod.

He sighs. “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy these few weeks. I wish I could be here for you every time something bad happens.”

“You’re here now.” I shake my head, refusing to let him blame himself. His stomach makes a growling sound and I realise in horror that he’s been sitting here, listening to me vent for about an hour now and he hasn’t had dinner. We take the food from the kitchen to eat in the living room. He tells me about his day at work, re-enacting the funny anecdotes that happened. As I watch him picking off the cucumber in the roll, his face illuminated by the television glow, I feel a swell of love for him and reach over to give him a peck on the lips.

“What was that for?” He chuckles as I hold his face in between my hands, like he did.

“Just because you’re here.”

#astro scenarios #Astro all light #Astro all night #astro #kpop scenarios #rocky scenarios #park minhyuk #mj #jinjin #cha eunwoo #moonbin #yoon sanha #fluff #kpop #soft #cute

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honeybellsurveys · 6 years

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•́ε•̀٥

Do you have a little sister? I wish :( The last person you kissed, how many times have you cried in front of them? Too many times to count. Do you know anyone who has been arrested? Yes. Think a lot before you fall asleep? Always. Ever been the only one trying to fix a relationship? Sort of. Are you guilty of flirting too much? Nah. Did you ever set up a lemonade stand when you were a kid? Yeah, once or twice. Does virginity matter to you? Not really. Do you know anybody who was abused? Yes. Have you ever bought or sold something on Facebook Marketplace? No. Do you feel uncomfortable sharing drinks with other people? Not if we are close. Is there something that happened in your past you hate talking about? Not really? Is there a difference between just love and in love? For sure. Are you good at admitting your problems? I find it hard to do. How many times have you dated the person you’re with now? Not with anyone currently. Has your cell phone ever rung in class? No, my phone is always on silent anyway. Do you ever feel like just laying down and giving up? Sometimes, but I haven't in a long time. Have you ever lied about your age? When I was younger. Lied about your name? No. Do you sit on the mattresses in furniture stores? Sometimes. Are there some topics that you aren’t very open about? It depends on the person. Have you ever had an encounter with a very dangerous animal? Yes. Have you ever fed a wild animal people food? All the time. Would you rather die or eat another human being? Lmao ya’ll gonna think I'm crazy. Do you wish that animals could talk? Why or why not? Oh my god that would actually be amazing, imagine all the knowledge you’d be able to learn and all the deep friendships you could make. Who did you last fall asleep with? Ruth Ann. Now your cell phone, what color is it? Rose gold. Who were you last in a car with? Katelynn, her bf and Angie. What color was the last vehicle you were in? Silver. Have you had “the best night of your life”? I hope not. Toilet papered someones house? No. Who was the last person you high-fived? A girl named Amy I met downtown last weekend lmao. Do you own a romper? Yes. What does your computer’s slow-loading cursor look like? Idek. Would you rather have a trampoline or swimming pool? I have both so. What was the name of the first porcelain doll you got? Don’t remember. Do you sell any products? If so, what? I don’t. If not, do you want to start a business? ^ Have your parents ever crushed your dreams? No. Do you own anything cheetah print? A pair of period panties lmao. Have you ever made a collage for your bedroom wall? Nope. Do you make DIY projects and gifts? No. Owls or peacocks? Owls. Lions or horses? Lions. Is your kitchen floor black and white checkered? Nope. What do you make wishes on? Shooting stars. What’s the best natural pain reliever? Hot water. Do you like trees? Yes, I love all plants :) What’s your favorite Paramore song? That’s a tough one omg but probably The Only Exception. What is your favorite color for bridesmaid dresses? Baby Pink or a pretty soft yellow !! Do you think you are pregnant? No. Do you like the ocean? I love it, water makes me so happy. Are you too shy to ask someone out? More along the lines of too insecure. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? Yeah. Is there a high chance of you going out to the movies soon? Maybe, I wanna see The Nun. What are you listening to? “Reflection internal”- Nujabes. Have you ever dated someone longer than a year? Almost. Would you be able to climb out your bedroom window to sneak out? I don’t live with my parents so there’s no need for that, I'm on the third floor of my building though so if I ever did want to it wouldn’t work out lmao. Can you taste the difference between brand name food and store brand food? Sometimes. Would you be embarrassed to buy pads/tampons/condoms? Which one more? Wouldn't be embarrassed to buy any of them. Do you still own a VCR? I have one lying around back home somewhere. Have you ever purchased Girl Scout cookies? Yep. Do you own a nightgown? Yes lmao. Who is one rapper that just always tends to get on your nerves? Why? Cardi B. Has anyone ever made you breakfast in bed? Were they trying to suck up? No one has ever made me it :(( When will be the next time you’ll get a shot? What is this shot anyway? Idk. When will you next eat tacos? Do you even like tacos, or not so much? Idk when I'll eat them next but I like them. Do you know anyone who is pregnant? Yep!! Would you or have you ever engaged in casual sex? I guess I sort of have engaged in it before but not really because it lead to a real relationship not long after lmao, however if I had no romantic feelings for someone I would prob engage in it now. What’s your favorite thing about spring? The rain, new life, the melting snow and the smell that’s always in the air. Have you ever tried belly dancing? If so, did you like it? Never tried it haha. Were you a part of any clique in high school? Nah. Have you ever given blood? No but I'd like to. Do you like the way you grew up? Yes I had a very happy childhood. Would you prefer to read or write poetry? Read. If you were to have a child, what would the last name be? Mine ig. Are you currently working? And if so do you like your job? I’m not working. Have you ever walked out on a job or just not showed up? No. Have you told your parents all of your secrets from when you were a teen? No, I still am a teen haha. Would you rather be able to fly or walk on water? Fly. What’s the best club you’ve ever been to? Never been to one. Which sport are you the best at playing? Competitive swimming if that counts. Do you know anyone who has gotten pregnant despite using contraception? Probably. Are you planning on buying a house in the near future? No. What was your favorite family vacation you went on as a kid? Trip to Alberta. What’s something about you that others might find unpleasant or off-putting? I can be kind of distant and very quiet at times. Have you ever kissed someone with a beard? Not a full on beard but they had a lil bit of facial hair. When you were younger, did you believe in Santa? Yeah. Are you going to make your kids believe in Santa? Of course. Have you ever made your own calendar? No. What foreign language did you take in high school? French. Do your parents have gray hair? No. What’s your favorite Katy Perry song? Don’t have one What was the last thing you did that made you feel proud of yourself? Finished my English assignment and figured out the first two questions on my math. What was the last significant and great thing that happened in your life? Started university and met lots of great people. What is your favorite Starbucks’ drink? I don’t go there much but I like their pumpkin spice lattes and refreshers. Who are your last 3 missed calls from? They’re all from my mom haha. Do you like Skittles? Sure. Do you blow dry your hair? Yes. How do you like your eggs? Fertilized. What song is the catchiest song you know? 365 So Fresh! What is your greatest life accomplishment? Don’t know yet. Who is the last person you left a voicemail for? I don't leave those. Which is better: the Twilight book, or the Twilight movie? Neither. Do you enjoy crossword puzzles? Not really idk. Do you own any records? Yep. Who was the last guy you called? Idk. You can only listen to THREE CDs for the rest of your life. What are they? I’m too tired to think about this. What is the most unique or uncommon thing about you? My whole being is unique and uncommon. What happened the last time you were in a fight with someone? They hung up on me lmao :-) Have you ever been in a physical fight? Who started it? No. What is your favorite type of kiss/way of kissing? Sloppy and sexual with lots of tongue. Favorite form of affection in general/not sexual/etc? Cuddles. What do you think about anime? LOVE. Who is the last person you unfollowed on Tumblr, and why did you do this? I can’t remember who that would be. What are some upcoming concerts in your town/city? There is like a Christian one being held here thanksgiving lmao. Is there any type of medicine you can’t take? For what reason? Not that I know of. Would you rather have potato or chicken noodle soup if you had to? Chicken noodle soup. If something on your body hurts, which part is it most likely to be? My nipples rn since they are newly pierced haha. Is Russian or Native American history more interesting to you? Loved learning about Russian history. Have you ever put gum on the bottom of your desk/chair? No. Would you rather go to the movies, drive-in, or stay at home and watch a movie? Go to the movies. Would you ever be a race-car driver? No. What kind of deodorant do you use? Secret cool water lily, smells so good. Have you ever wished you were born the opposite sex? No. What was the last thing you spent a lot of time thinking about? My ex. What do you think about astrology/the zodiac? If you used to believe/not believe in it, what changed your mind? I’m not a super avid believer but I find it to actually be pretty accurate sometimes and I like to learn about it, it’s fun. What is one conspiracy you believe in? Or one you think is total crap? Idk I believe in so many conspiracy theories there are a lot. Where was the last place you didn’t want to go but had to anyway? Class this morning. When was the last time you yelled/screamed and why? I dunno. What was the last big decision you made? Do you think you made the right choice? To breakup with my ex, I think it was the right decision for both of us although it really hurt and still do sometimes. What Hogwarts house are you in? What do you think about the “stereotypes” regarding your house? I always say i’m Slytherin even though I don’t even read/watch Harry Potter. What is something you want to do, but you don’t think you’ll ever be able to? Travel the world. When was the last time you left somewhere for forever (or at least don’t plan on returning)? Dunno. What was the last thing you quit? ^ Do you like to help people? How about animals? Which would you rather help, if it applies? Of course I like to help both, it depends on the situation which I'd like to help more. As an adult, what is the most and least you’ve weighed? Not sure. What is something you like that no one else you know likes too? No idea. What is something you don’t like that everyone seems to like? X. Do you follow a particular diet/meal-plan/ethic? Nah. What is a subject you tend to avoid with other people, for whatever reason? My sexuality. What is the longest (or most involved) thing you’ve ever written? An English research paper. Do you prefer to live with others or by yourself? Why is this? I have a roommate n I lover her :) the university put us together. What scares you about getting older? The physical effects health wise. What about something you’ve done that sounds too wild to believe? Raised up ducklings in my closet hahah. What was the last thing someone made fun of you for? I don’t know. Do you have a member of the opposite sex you’ve told everything to? Pretty much. What color hair do you find sexiest on the opposite gender? Black n dark brown. Who last slept in your bed besides you? My ex (my bed back home) no one has slept in my dorm bed besides me yet. If the last person you had sex with asked you to date them, would you? I’d heavily consider taking them back but I mean. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose? BTS!! I’ve been on the Kpop grind lately.

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oovitus · 6 years

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Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet.

Lots of people looking to improve their eating think meal plans are the answer. The only problem? Meal plans usually suck… and they rarely last. So, instead of prescribing yet another doomed eating regimen, check out these 6 ways to transform any diet in a sustainable way.

++++

“Do I get a meal plan?”

This is the most common question we get from folks who are considering, or just started out in, our nutrition coaching programs.

The answer: No, we don’t do meal plans.

But we can’t blame people for asking.

Sure, meal plans have long been a staple of the fitness and nutrition industry. Coaches are taught to create them. Clients are taught to expect them.

Unfortunately…

Most of the time, meal plans don’t work.

You see, traditional meal plans are explicit prescriptions.

Eat this exact thing, in this exact amount, at this exact time.

For example, you’ll often see:

Breakfast – 7:30am 3 eggs, scrambled 1 cup vegetables 1 piece whole grain toast 1 cup coffee 1 glass water

Morning snack – 10:00am 1 protein bar 1 handful mixed nuts

Lunch – 12:30pm 4 oz chicken 2 cups salad 1 handful seeds 1 glass water

After exercise – 4:30pm 1 scoop whey protein 1/2 cup frozen fruit 1 tsp omega 3 oil 12 oz water

Dinner – 7:00pm 4 oz steak 1 cup cooked veggies 1 baked potato 1 glass water

You (or your clients/patients) might be thinking, “Good! I want a plan. I’m sick of trying to figure all this stuff out! Just tell me what to eat!”

Unfortunately, when we try to follow rigid prescriptions like this, lots can (and often does) go wrong.

For example:

Scenario 1: You just don’t stick to the plan.

No matter how enthusiastic you are, meal plans can be tough to follow.

This is normal. Life can get in the way.

People get busy,

we’re not always prepared,

kids get sick,

bosses expect you to work late,

it’s always someone’s birthday (or a special holiday), and

sometimes you just don’t feel like having a protein bar at 10am.

What’s more, even if you’ve actually paid to have someone make your plan, you might find yourself rebelling against it in subtle (or not-so-subtle) ways.

This is also normal.

Unfortunately, it means you might not get the results you hope for. For instance, a meal plan you hoped would help you lose weight could actually encourage you to gain weight instead.

Scenario 2: You follow the plan perfectly.

In fact, you follow it too well and for too long.

Most meal plans are meant to be temporary.

They’re designed to help a person get to a specific short-term goal, like dropping a few extra pounds before a wedding, learning to manage blood sugar, or cutting weight for an athletic competition.

Our bodies can usually adapt to a rigid way of eating for a short period of time.

But if you’re too strict for too long, you could wind up with disordered eating habits and lasting health (mental, metabolic, hormonal, etc) consequences.

Scenario 3: You follow the plan for a little while but it sucks.

It isn’t sustainable. It doesn’t make you feel better. It doesn’t keep you sane.

Maybe you see some short-term results (or not). But you hate living and eating this way. You never want to see another stupid piece of lettuce or 4 ounces of chicken.

Eventually, you get so turned off by the process that you regress or quit altogether. You conclude that “eating healthy” sucks.

And you miss your big chance to learn how to make healthier, more enjoyable, more lasting and real changes.

Another reason meal plans fail.

One of the biggest (yet generally unacknowledged) problems with traditional meal plans is their focus on “nutrients”.

Real people don’t eat “nutrients”. We eat food.

We eat meals, often with other people.

We eat meals that match our cultural background and social interests.

And we rarely measure things precisely.

Sure, sometimes an explicit prescription is necessary.

For instance, professional athletes or bodybuilders (in other words, people who make money off their bodies and athletic skills) use meal plans to prepare for training and competition.

A prescribed meal for someone in that situation might look something like this:

1/4 cup dry oats

3 oz turkey breast

1 cup steamed broccoli

5 almonds

1 omega-3 supplement

1 cup green tea (unsweetened)

But most of us don’t need that level of surgical precision.

We don’t normally eat “ounces” of things, or refer to food by their nutrients (like “omega-3 fatty acids”).

Instead, we eat foods like:

hamburgers

tacos and burritos

salads

pasta and noodles

sandwiches, wraps, pitas and rotis

stews and curries

cereal and granola

stir-fries

casseroles

Bottom line: If you want to eat better, you don’t have to get weird about things.

You don’t need to weigh and measure everything, or count out your almonds.

Ask yourself: “Is someone paying me to do this?” If the answer is no, you likely don’t need this kind of approach.

You just need to think about what you’re already eating, and how you could make it a little bit better.

This means fiddling and adjusting.

Making small changes and improvements to what you already normally eat and enjoy, one small step at a time.

Think about a spectrum of food quality rather than “bad” or “good” foods.

Welcome to the meal transformation game.

When you play with the idea of a food spectrum or food continuum, you get to experiment with variables like:

what you eat, and

how you eat it.

Think of this as a game.

How can you play “make this meal just a little bit better” in every situation?

In which situations is that easier or harder?

When your choices are limited (for instance, when you’re traveling, or eating at a workplace cafeteria), how can you shoot for “a little bit better” while still being realistic, and without trying to be “perfect”?

(Hint for coaches: this is a great game to play with the people you work with.)

Let’s transform breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Here’s how that “food spectrum” might look in daily life, with a sample day of eating.

Transforming breakfast

Stage 1

Let’s say that your go-to breakfast is a whipped-cream coffee drink and a chocolate croissant.

You pick it up in the drive-thru, and wolf it down on your way to work.

This is your starting point. It’s not “bad”. It’s just no longer working for you.

You’re getting indigestion from rushing, the croissant doesn’t hold you at all, and you’ve just spilled the coffee on your crotch while changing lanes.

Now your game is to improve your breakfast just a little bit, starting with what you already have or do.

Stage 2

Your opening moves in the meal transformation game:

You might replace the croissant with a whole grain muffin.

Instead of a “dessert in a cup”, you get a regular coffee with a single cream and sugar.

You grab a yogurt cup on your way out of the house for a bit of protein.

Naturally, you’re still rushed and busy… so you eat your breakfast with some distractions, while scrolling through emails at work.

But this is a solid start. Well done.

Stage 3

Next level of game play:

You switch the muffin to granola with cottage cheese or Greek yogurt.

You switch the cream in your coffee for 2% milk. (Or even go right to black coffee, you meal player you!)

You add some colorful fruit.

You’re now eating out of dishes on a table, instead of out of takeout packages off the dashboard of your car.

Of course, you’re still checking out the news headlines while you eat…

No problem. We’re keeping it real.

Stage 4

Now you are seriously playing like a pro.

You’ve changed “rushing and panicked” to “set aside a little extra time to enjoy a leisurely breakfast”.

You cleverly prepped an egg frittata with veggies in advance on your food prep day.

The coffee’s become green tea, since you noticed that too much coffee was tweaking you out.

The protein plus colorful fruit and veg have become the stars of the meal.

You’ve discovered you really like lemon water. (WHAT? You don’t even know you anymore!)

You eat mindfully, feeling relaxed, while watching the sun rise.

Ahhh.

Transforming lunch

Stage 1

At this point, starting out, the idea of a sit-down lunch feels flat out ridiculous.

“Eat slowly? Who has time for that during a busy workday? Grab a burger and go!”

Another “car dashboard” meal. Another stomach ache and regret.

You decide you might want to play with this meal too.

Stage 2

To improve this meal a little bit:

You go to a higher-end burger place where you’re pretty sure they use real meat.

You get a side salad with that burger, and maybe just a few potato chips.

You choose a diet soda instead of regular.

You don’t eat in your car, but you do eat by your computer.

That’s OK. You’re progressing.

Stage 3

At this stage, you’re doing a little prep work:

You whipped up some burgers in advance so they are handy and ready to take to work.

You also grabbed some nice cheese and whole grain buns from the local market on shopping day.

For lunch, all you have to do is take your homemade burger and its fixins to work.

You still grab a diet cola from the vending machine to wash it down.

You move from your desk to the lunchroom, where you socialize with co-workers. This slows you down a bit and helps you digest and relax.

Stage 4

You’re having the burger without the bun, alongside a nice pre-prepped salad.

Instead of staying at your desk or in the office, you take a break.

You sit outside and get some fresh air while you enjoy your meal.

For a drink, water’s all you need.

Transforming dinner

Stage 1

It’s 8pm. You’ve just gotten home after an insane day at work.

All you want to do is put food into your face and zone out in front of the TV.

You can’t even imagine making anything more complicated than boxed macaroni ‘n’ cheese right now.

Ketchup and hot dogs are as fancy as it gets.

Stage 2

Same concept, but:

You’re adding some extra protein with the help of a rotisserie chicken leg that you grabbed at the grocery store on the way home.

You’ve added a side salad, just grabbing a few handfuls of pre-washed greens out of a bag.

You’ve whipped up your own pasta.

Work is still on your mind, and a couple drinks will take the edge off.

Stage 3

Things are getting fancy.

You’re upping the protein with a little more chicken.

You’re having a little less pasta.

You’ve also added a nice big salad to the mix.

You’ve cut the booze to 1 drink.

Plus, you’re sitting at the dinner table, instead of flopping down on your couch or standing over the sink.

Stage 4

Again, we’re playing at pro level here.

With your meal planning and prep strategies, even a weeknight dinner looks good.

You can whip up a delicious salad in 3 minutes flat and you have some pre-cooked quinoa on hand.

That rotisserie chicken is still a fast, convenient option, but now it’s got some healthy buddies.

You’re indulging in a single glass of good wine these days, and you take time to savor it.

Meal transformation is not about reaching perfection.

If you’re at stage 1, all you have to do is shoot for stage 2. Or stage 1.5.

If you’re in stage 2, play with getting to stage 3.

And if you’re stage 3, heck, you can stay where you are.

You might never get to stage 4. Or it might only happen at times when you’re relaxed and have a little extra time.

Stage 4 might only happen on Sunday night, whereas the rest of your week is a mix of stages 1, 2, and — if you’re super lucky — 3.

And that’s OK.

How far you progress along the continuum all depends on what YOU want, what YOU need, and what YOU can reasonably do, right now.

Over time, things can change.

Play YOUR game.

Success secret: Have a food prep ritual.

You might look at these photos and think, “How can people possibly do all that?”

One success secret: Having a food prep ritual.

The idea is simple:

Practice planning and preparing healthy food in advance.

This makes healthy eating convenient and easy.

It also makes decisions easier: You don’t have to make a choice when you’re rushed and hangry.

Your food prep ritual can include:

shopping (or arranging to have food delivered)

menu and meal planning

washing and chopping vegetables

cooking/preparing protein (e.g. cooking up some chicken breasts)

cooking meals in bulk (e.g. casseroles, soups, stews, chili)

preparing the dry ingredients for things like Super Shakes or healthy muffin mix

soaking grains/beans beforehand so that they’ll be ready to cook later

sorting foods into smaller containers or baggies

freezing and refrigerating food for later

planning healthy meals that someone else cooks (e.g. using a meal delivery service, deciding in advance what to order at a restaurant, etc.)

looking ahead to ensure healthy eating strategies during the next few days, especially during difficult times (e.g. a busy week, traveling, dealing with a family crisis, etc.)

Mix and match any of these to find what works for you.

Experiment with systems, skills and strategies that work for YOU and YOUR life.

The real goal of a meal plan is to stop using a meal plan.

Fit, healthy people who have a good relationship with food don’t need other people to tell them exactly what to eat at all times.

Living a fit and healthy life doesn’t require perfection, either.

If you are using a meal plan:

That’s OK.

Some people like prescription, especially if they are working towards a specific short-term goal, like cutting weight to compete in wrestling, making sure they get enough nutrients to support a healthy pregnancy, or fueling their triathlon performance.

Keep it short-lived.

Meal plans are supposed to be temporary, working towards a short-term goal.

Keep it real.

As much as possible, try to make the meal plan fit your real life, not the other way around.

If you’re a parent, a worker, a student, or anyone else living in the real world, most of your meals will fall somewhere in the stages 1 through 3 spectrum. That’s perfectly OK. Just experiment with being a little bit better, wherever you can.

Remember all goals require trade-offs.

If you want to achieve a high level of performance or exceptional body composition, understand what you are prioritizing and sacrificing.

Getting very lean, for instance, comes with costs.

Make sure it’s working for you.

If your meal plan is making you feel:

overwhelmed

anxious and fretful

guilty

regretful

bad

overly rigid and/or preoccupied with food…

or any other negative, unproductive emotion…

…and if you find that meal plans result in you:

“falling off the wagon”, hard

getting obsessive and compulsive about food

restricting foods and food groups, or

doing “all or nothing”, usually ending with “nothing”

…then consider trying another approach.

What to do next

1. Consider where you sit on the spectrum of meal “stages”.

Where’s your food game at?

What level are you playing at?

What level would you like to play at?

Given your goals and your current situation, what is realistic?

For example, if you currently eat at stage 1, your goal might be to eat at stage 2 for most meals.

Or, if you eat at stage 3 most of the time but find yourself dipping into stage 1 or 2 meals more often than you’d like, aim to stay at stage 3 a little more consistently.

(Hint for coaches: you can walk people through these questions and help them arrive at their own answers.)

2. Start small. One step at a time.

Pick one meal to transform and focus on that.

For instance, you might leave all your other meals at stage 1, and focus on getting lunch to stage 2.

Concentrate on improving that one meal each day.

Using the examples above, you might think about things like:

adding protein

adding veggies or fruits

eating less processed food

eating more nutrient-dense, whole foods

drinking less alcohol or fewer sweet drinks

drinking more water

eating in a calmer, more relaxed setting, and/or

eating more slowly and mindfully

Of course, don’t try to do all these at once.

Try just fiddling with one or two, and see which ones work best for you.

3. Add things slowly.

Once you’ve improved one meal a day, try another.

If you feel like lunch is a solid stage 2 or 3, play with moving breakfast, dinner, or snacks along the spectrum.

Or, once you’ve improved one factor in a meal (e.g. adding more protein), try another.

For instance, if you’re getting more protein, now try switching out your sugary soda for some soda water. Or adding a little more veggies.

Be patient; small steps add up.

4. Set yourself up for success.

Notice what makes it easier and simpler for you to eat better.

Then figure out how to do or get more of that.

For instance:

Is planning helping you? How could you do more of that?

Is a healthy meal delivery service making it easy? Could you set aside a little more cash to get two meals a day instead of one?

Is setting aside time on Sunday afternoon to cook some protein a good idea? Great, keep on doing that. Book it in your calendar.

There’s no “right” way to do this. Do what works for YOU.

5. Enjoy your meals.

Meal plans don’t usually address how you eat.

Before you change what you eat, you can also try changing how you eat. For example, you could:

slow down

breathe between bites

relax

savor your food

sit at a table if you can, and/or

use real dishes if you can.

Give yourself some time and space to appreciate those tasty concoctions you put together.

Meal time is YOUR time.

6. Work towards being your own boss.

Sometimes you might just want someone to tell you what to do.

That’s fine, and helpful, especially if you’re juggling a lot. But only for a while.

Over time, look for ways to help yourself intuitively and wisely make better choices, rather than just following the rules.

(Coaches, much more than serving up prescriptions, this is your job too: to help the folks you work with arrive at a place where they feel good about making decisions for themselves.)

Think long-term. What do you want to happen over the next few months? Year? 10 years? Do you want to be on a meal plan for the next few decades?

Today, if you were to take one small step towards the “better” end of the meal spectrum, what might that look like?

How can you start playing the “meal transformation game” today?

If you’re a coach, or you want to be…

Learning how to coach clients, patients, friends, or family members through healthy eating and lifestyle changes — including helping them with meal transformation — is both an art and a science.

If you’d like to learn more about both, consider the Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification. The next group kicks off shortly.

What’s it all about?

The Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification is the world’s most respected nutrition education program. It gives you the knowledge, systems, and tools you need to really understand how food influences a person’s health and fitness. Plus the ability to turn that knowledge into a thriving coaching practice.

Developed over 15 years, and proven with over 100,000 clients and patients, the Level 1 curriculum stands alone as the authority on the science of nutrition and the art of coaching.

Whether you’re already mid-career, or just starting out, the Level 1 Certification is your springboard to a deeper understanding of nutrition, the authority to coach it, and the ability to turn what you know into results.

[Of course, if you’re already a student or graduate of the Level 1 Certification, check out our Level 2 Certification Master Class. It’s an exclusive, year-long mentorship designed for elite professionals looking to master the art of coaching and be part of the top 1% of health and fitness coaches in the world.]

Interested? Add your name to the presale list. You’ll save up to 33% and secure your spot 24 hours before everyone else.

We’ll be opening up spots in our next Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification on Wednesday, October 3rd, 2018.

If you want to find out more, we’ve set up the following presale list, which gives you two advantages.

Pay less than everyone else. We like to reward people who are eager to boost their credentials and are ready to commit to getting the education they need. So we’re offering a discount of up to 33% off the general price when you sign up for the presale list.

Sign up 24 hours before the general public and increase your chances of getting a spot. We only open the certification program twice per year. Due to high demand, spots in the program are limited and have historically sold out in a matter of hours. But when you sign up for the presale list, we’ll give you the opportunity to register a full 24 hours before anyone else.

If you’re ready for a deeper understanding of nutrition, the authority to coach it, and the ability to turn what you know into results… this is your chance to see what the world’s top professional nutrition coaching system can do for you.

The post Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet. appeared first on Precision Nutrition.

Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet. published first on

0 notes

oovitus · 6 years

Text

Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet.

++++

“Do I get a meal plan?”

This is the most common question we get from folks who are considering, or just started out in, our nutrition coaching programs.

The answer: No, we don’t do meal plans.

But we can’t blame people for asking.

Sure, meal plans have long been a staple of the fitness and nutrition industry. Coaches are taught to create them. Clients are taught to expect them.

Unfortunately…

Most of the time, meal plans don’t work.

You see, traditional meal plans are explicit prescriptions.

Eat this exact thing, in this exact amount, at this exact time.

For example, you’ll often see:

Breakfast – 7:30am 3 eggs, scrambled 1 cup vegetables 1 piece whole grain toast 1 cup coffee 1 glass water

Morning snack – 10:00am 1 protein bar 1 handful mixed nuts

Lunch – 12:30pm 4 oz chicken 2 cups salad 1 handful seeds 1 glass water

After exercise – 4:30pm 1 scoop whey protein 1/2 cup frozen fruit 1 tsp omega 3 oil 12 oz water

Dinner – 7:00pm 4 oz steak 1 cup cooked veggies 1 baked potato 1 glass water

You (or your clients/patients) might be thinking, “Good! I want a plan. I’m sick of trying to figure all this stuff out! Just tell me what to eat!”

Unfortunately, when we try to follow rigid prescriptions like this, lots can (and often does) go wrong.

For example:

Scenario 1: You just don’t stick to the plan.

No matter how enthusiastic you are, meal plans can be tough to follow.

This is normal. Life can get in the way.

People get busy,

we’re not always prepared,

kids get sick,

bosses expect you to work late,

it’s always someone’s birthday (or a special holiday), and

sometimes you just don’t feel like having a protein bar at 10am.

What’s more, even if you’ve actually paid to have someone make your plan, you might find yourself rebelling against it in subtle (or not-so-subtle) ways.

This is also normal.

Unfortunately, it means you might not get the results you hope for. For instance, a meal plan you hoped would help you lose weight could actually encourage you to gain weight instead.

Scenario 2: You follow the plan perfectly.

In fact, you follow it too well and for too long.

Most meal plans are meant to be temporary.

Our bodies can usually adapt to a rigid way of eating for a short period of time.

But if you’re too strict for too long, you could wind up with disordered eating habits and lasting health (mental, metabolic, hormonal, etc) consequences.

Scenario 3: You follow the plan for a little while but it sucks.

It isn’t sustainable. It doesn’t make you feel better. It doesn’t keep you sane.

Maybe you see some short-term results (or not). But you hate living and eating this way. You never want to see another stupid piece of lettuce or 4 ounces of chicken.

Eventually, you get so turned off by the process that you regress or quit altogether. You conclude that “eating healthy” sucks.

And you miss your big chance to learn how to make healthier, more enjoyable, more lasting and real changes.

Another reason meal plans fail.

One of the biggest (yet generally unacknowledged) problems with traditional meal plans is their focus on “nutrients”.

Real people don’t eat “nutrients”. We eat food.

We eat meals, often with other people.

We eat meals that match our cultural background and social interests.

And we rarely measure things precisely.

Sure, sometimes an explicit prescription is necessary.

For instance, professional athletes or bodybuilders (in other words, people who make money off their bodies and athletic skills) use meal plans to prepare for training and competition.

A prescribed meal for someone in that situation might look something like this:

1/4 cup dry oats

3 oz turkey breast

1 cup steamed broccoli

5 almonds

1 omega-3 supplement

1 cup green tea (unsweetened)

But most of us don’t need that level of surgical precision.

We don’t normally eat “ounces” of things, or refer to food by their nutrients (like “omega-3 fatty acids”).

Instead, we eat foods like:

hamburgers

tacos and burritos

salads

pasta and noodles

sandwiches, wraps, pitas and rotis

stews and curries

cereal and granola

stir-fries

casseroles

Bottom line: If you want to eat better, you don’t have to get weird about things.

You don’t need to weigh and measure everything, or count out your almonds.

Ask yourself: “Is someone paying me to do this?” If the answer is no, you likely don’t need this kind of approach.

You just need to think about what you’re already eating, and how you could make it a little bit better.

This means fiddling and adjusting.

Making small changes and improvements to what you already normally eat and enjoy, one small step at a time.

Think about a spectrum of food quality rather than “bad” or “good” foods.

Welcome to the meal transformation game.

When you play with the idea of a food spectrum or food continuum, you get to experiment with variables like:

what you eat, and

how you eat it.

Think of this as a game.

How can you play “make this meal just a little bit better” in every situation?

In which situations is that easier or harder?

(Hint for coaches: this is a great game to play with the people you work with.)

Let’s transform breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Here’s how that “food spectrum” might look in daily life, with a sample day of eating.

Transforming breakfast

Stage 1

Let’s say that your go-to breakfast is a whipped-cream coffee drink and a chocolate croissant.

You pick it up in the drive-thru, and wolf it down on your way to work.

This is your starting point. It’s not “bad”. It’s just no longer working for you.

You’re getting indigestion from rushing, the croissant doesn’t hold you at all, and you’ve just spilled the coffee on your crotch while changing lanes.

Now your game is to improve your breakfast just a little bit, starting with what you already have or do.

Stage 2

Your opening moves in the meal transformation game:

You might replace the croissant with a whole grain muffin.

Instead of a “dessert in a cup”, you get a regular coffee with a single cream and sugar.

You grab a yogurt cup on your way out of the house for a bit of protein.

Naturally, you’re still rushed and busy… so you eat your breakfast with some distractions, while scrolling through emails at work.

But this is a solid start. Well done.

Stage 3

Next level of game play:

You switch the muffin to granola with cottage cheese or Greek yogurt.

You switch the cream in your coffee for 2% milk. (Or even go right to black coffee, you meal player you!)

You add some colorful fruit.

You’re now eating out of dishes on a table, instead of out of takeout packages off the dashboard of your car.

Of course, you’re still checking out the news headlines while you eat…

No problem. We’re keeping it real.

Stage 4

Now you are seriously playing like a pro.

You’ve changed “rushing and panicked” to “set aside a little extra time to enjoy a leisurely breakfast”.

You cleverly prepped an egg frittata with veggies in advance on your food prep day.

The coffee’s become green tea, since you noticed that too much coffee was tweaking you out.

The protein plus colorful fruit and veg have become the stars of the meal.

You’ve discovered you really like lemon water. (WHAT? You don’t even know you anymore!)

You eat mindfully, feeling relaxed, while watching the sun rise.

Ahhh.

Transforming lunch

Stage 1

At this point, starting out, the idea of a sit-down lunch feels flat out ridiculous.

“Eat slowly? Who has time for that during a busy workday? Grab a burger and go!”

Another “car dashboard” meal. Another stomach ache and regret.

You decide you might want to play with this meal too.

Stage 2

To improve this meal a little bit:

You go to a higher-end burger place where you’re pretty sure they use real meat.

You get a side salad with that burger, and maybe just a few potato chips.

You choose a diet soda instead of regular.

You don’t eat in your car, but you do eat by your computer.

That’s OK. You’re progressing.

Stage 3

At this stage, you’re doing a little prep work:

You whipped up some burgers in advance so they are handy and ready to take to work.

You also grabbed some nice cheese and whole grain buns from the local market on shopping day.

For lunch, all you have to do is take your homemade burger and its fixins to work.

You still grab a diet cola from the vending machine to wash it down.

You move from your desk to the lunchroom, where you socialize with co-workers. This slows you down a bit and helps you digest and relax.

Stage 4

You’re having the burger without the bun, alongside a nice pre-prepped salad.

Instead of staying at your desk or in the office, you take a break.

You sit outside and get some fresh air while you enjoy your meal.

For a drink, water’s all you need.

Transforming dinner

Stage 1

It’s 8pm. You’ve just gotten home after an insane day at work.

All you want to do is put food into your face and zone out in front of the TV.

You can’t even imagine making anything more complicated than boxed macaroni ‘n’ cheese right now.

Ketchup and hot dogs are as fancy as it gets.

Stage 2

Same concept, but:

You’re adding some extra protein with the help of a rotisserie chicken leg that you grabbed at the grocery store on the way home.

You’ve added a side salad, just grabbing a few handfuls of pre-washed greens out of a bag.

You’ve whipped up your own pasta.

Work is still on your mind, and a couple drinks will take the edge off.

Stage 3

Things are getting fancy.

You’re upping the protein with a little more chicken.

You’re having a little less pasta.

You’ve also added a nice big salad to the mix.

You’ve cut the booze to 1 drink.

Plus, you’re sitting at the dinner table, instead of flopping down on your couch or standing over the sink.

Stage 4

Again, we’re playing at pro level here.

With your meal planning and prep strategies, even a weeknight dinner looks good.

You can whip up a delicious salad in 3 minutes flat and you have some pre-cooked quinoa on hand.

That rotisserie chicken is still a fast, convenient option, but now it’s got some healthy buddies.

You’re indulging in a single glass of good wine these days, and you take time to savor it.

Meal transformation is not about reaching perfection.

If you’re at stage 1, all you have to do is shoot for stage 2. Or stage 1.5.

If you’re in stage 2, play with getting to stage 3.

And if you’re stage 3, heck, you can stay where you are.

You might never get to stage 4. Or it might only happen at times when you’re relaxed and have a little extra time.

Stage 4 might only happen on Sunday night, whereas the rest of your week is a mix of stages 1, 2, and — if you’re super lucky — 3.

And that’s OK.

How far you progress along the continuum all depends on what YOU want, what YOU need, and what YOU can reasonably do, right now.

Over time, things can change.

Play YOUR game.

Success secret: Have a food prep ritual.

You might look at these photos and think, “How can people possibly do all that?”

One success secret: Having a food prep ritual.

The idea is simple:

Practice planning and preparing healthy food in advance.

This makes healthy eating convenient and easy.

It also makes decisions easier: You don’t have to make a choice when you’re rushed and hangry.

Your food prep ritual can include:

shopping (or arranging to have food delivered)

menu and meal planning

washing and chopping vegetables

cooking/preparing protein (e.g. cooking up some chicken breasts)

cooking meals in bulk (e.g. casseroles, soups, stews, chili)

preparing the dry ingredients for things like Super Shakes or healthy muffin mix

soaking grains/beans beforehand so that they’ll be ready to cook later

sorting foods into smaller containers or baggies

freezing and refrigerating food for later

planning healthy meals that someone else cooks (e.g. using a meal delivery service, deciding in advance what to order at a restaurant, etc.)

looking ahead to ensure healthy eating strategies during the next few days, especially during difficult times (e.g. a busy week, traveling, dealing with a family crisis, etc.)

Mix and match any of these to find what works for you.

Experiment with systems, skills and strategies that work for YOU and YOUR life.

The real goal of a meal plan is to stop using a meal plan.

Fit, healthy people who have a good relationship with food don’t need other people to tell them exactly what to eat at all times.

Living a fit and healthy life doesn’t require perfection, either.

If you are using a meal plan:

That’s OK.

Keep it short-lived.

Meal plans are supposed to be temporary, working towards a short-term goal.

Keep it real.

As much as possible, try to make the meal plan fit your real life, not the other way around.

Remember all goals require trade-offs.

If you want to achieve a high level of performance or exceptional body composition, understand what you are prioritizing and sacrificing.

Getting very lean, for instance, comes with costs.

Make sure it’s working for you.

If your meal plan is making you feel:

overwhelmed

anxious and fretful

guilty

regretful

bad

overly rigid and/or preoccupied with food…

or any other negative, unproductive emotion…

…and if you find that meal plans result in you:

“falling off the wagon”, hard

getting obsessive and compulsive about food

restricting foods and food groups, or

doing “all or nothing”, usually ending with “nothing”

…then consider trying another approach.

What to do next

1. Consider where you sit on the spectrum of meal “stages”.

Where’s your food game at?

What level are you playing at?

What level would you like to play at?

Given your goals and your current situation, what is realistic?

For example, if you currently eat at stage 1, your goal might be to eat at stage 2 for most meals.

Or, if you eat at stage 3 most of the time but find yourself dipping into stage 1 or 2 meals more often than you’d like, aim to stay at stage 3 a little more consistently.

(Hint for coaches: you can walk people through these questions and help them arrive at their own answers.)

2. Start small. One step at a time.

Pick one meal to transform and focus on that.

For instance, you might leave all your other meals at stage 1, and focus on getting lunch to stage 2.

Concentrate on improving that one meal each day.

Using the examples above, you might think about things like:

adding protein

adding veggies or fruits

eating less processed food

eating more nutrient-dense, whole foods

drinking less alcohol or fewer sweet drinks

drinking more water

eating in a calmer, more relaxed setting, and/or

eating more slowly and mindfully

Of course, don’t try to do all these at once.

Try just fiddling with one or two, and see which ones work best for you.

3. Add things slowly.

Once you’ve improved one meal a day, try another.

If you feel like lunch is a solid stage 2 or 3, play with moving breakfast, dinner, or snacks along the spectrum.

Or, once you’ve improved one factor in a meal (e.g. adding more protein), try another.

For instance, if you’re getting more protein, now try switching out your sugary soda for some soda water. Or adding a little more veggies.

Be patient; small steps add up.

4. Set yourself up for success.

Notice what makes it easier and simpler for you to eat better.

Then figure out how to do or get more of that.

For instance:

Is planning helping you? How could you do more of that?

Is a healthy meal delivery service making it easy? Could you set aside a little more cash to get two meals a day instead of one?

Is setting aside time on Sunday afternoon to cook some protein a good idea? Great, keep on doing that. Book it in your calendar.

There’s no “right” way to do this. Do what works for YOU.

5. Enjoy your meals.

Meal plans don’t usually address how you eat.

Before you change what you eat, you can also try changing how you eat. For example, you could:

slow down

breathe between bites

relax

savor your food

sit at a table if you can, and/or

use real dishes if you can.

Give yourself some time and space to appreciate those tasty concoctions you put together.

Meal time is YOUR time.

6. Work towards being your own boss.

Sometimes you might just want someone to tell you what to do.

That’s fine, and helpful, especially if you’re juggling a lot. But only for a while.

Over time, look for ways to help yourself intuitively and wisely make better choices, rather than just following the rules.

(Coaches, much more than serving up prescriptions, this is your job too: to help the folks you work with arrive at a place where they feel good about making decisions for themselves.)

Think long-term. What do you want to happen over the next few months? Year? 10 years? Do you want to be on a meal plan for the next few decades?

Today, if you were to take one small step towards the “better” end of the meal spectrum, what might that look like?

How can you start playing the “meal transformation game” today?

If you’re a coach, or you want to be…

Learning how to coach clients, patients, friends, or family members through healthy eating and lifestyle changes — including helping them with meal transformation — is both an art and a science.

If you’d like to learn more about both, consider the Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification. The next group kicks off shortly.

What’s it all about?

Developed over 15 years, and proven with over 100,000 clients and patients, the Level 1 curriculum stands alone as the authority on the science of nutrition and the art of coaching.

Interested? Add your name to the presale list. You’ll save up to 33% and secure your spot 24 hours before everyone else.

We’ll be opening up spots in our next Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification on Wednesday, October 3rd, 2018.

If you want to find out more, we’ve set up the following presale list, which gives you two advantages.

The post Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet. appeared first on Precision Nutrition.

Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet. published first on https://storeseapharmacy.tumblr.com

0 notes

oovitus · 6 years

Text

Meal plans usually suck. Here are 6 better ways to transform your diet.

++++

“Do I get a meal plan?”

This is the most common question we get from folks who are considering, or just started out in, our nutrition coaching programs.

The answer: No, we don’t do meal plans.

But we can’t blame people for asking.

Sure, meal plans have long been a staple of the fitness and nutrition industry. Coaches are taught to create them. Clients are taught to expect them.

Unfortunately…

Most of the time, meal plans don’t work.

You see, traditional meal plans are explicit prescriptions.

Eat this exact thing, in this exact amount, at this exact time.

For example, you’ll often see:

Breakfast – 7:30am 3 eggs, scrambled 1 cup vegetables 1 piece whole grain toast 1 cup coffee 1 glass water

Morning snack – 10:00am 1 protein bar 1 handful mixed nuts

Lunch – 12:30pm 4 oz chicken 2 cups salad 1 handful seeds 1 glass water

After exercise – 4:30pm 1 scoop whey protein 1/2 cup frozen fruit 1 tsp omega 3 oil 12 oz water

Dinner – 7:00pm 4 oz steak 1 cup cooked veggies 1 baked potato 1 glass water

You (or your clients/patients) might be thinking, “Good! I want a plan. I’m sick of trying to figure all this stuff out! Just tell me what to eat!”

Unfortunately, when we try to follow rigid prescriptions like this, lots can (and often does) go wrong.

For example:

Scenario 1: You just don’t stick to the plan.

No matter how enthusiastic you are, meal plans can be tough to follow.

This is normal. Life can get in the way.

People get busy,

we’re not always prepared,

kids get sick,

bosses expect you to work late,

it’s always someone’s birthday (or a special holiday), and

sometimes you just don’t feel like having a protein bar at 10am.

What’s more, even if you’ve actually paid to have someone make your plan, you might find yourself rebelling against it in subtle (or not-so-subtle) ways.

This is also normal.

Unfortunately, it means you might not get the results you hope for. For instance, a meal plan you hoped would help you lose weight could actually encourage you to gain weight instead.

Scenario 2: You follow the plan perfectly.

In fact, you follow it too well and for too long.

Most meal plans are meant to be temporary.

Our bodies can usually adapt to a rigid way of eating for a short period of time.

But if you’re too strict for too long, you could wind up with disordered eating habits and lasting health (mental, metabolic, hormonal, etc) consequences.

Scenario 3: You follow the plan for a little while but it sucks.

It isn’t sustainable. It doesn’t make you feel better. It doesn’t keep you sane.

Maybe you see some short-term results (or not). But you hate living and eating this way. You never want to see another stupid piece of lettuce or 4 ounces of chicken.

Eventually, you get so turned off by the process that you regress or quit altogether. You conclude that “eating healthy” sucks.

And you miss your big chance to learn how to make healthier, more enjoyable, more lasting and real changes.

Another reason meal plans fail.

One of the biggest (yet generally unacknowledged) problems with traditional meal plans is their focus on “nutrients”.

Real people don’t eat “nutrients”. We eat food.

We eat meals, often with other people.

We eat meals that match our cultural background and social interests.

And we rarely measure things precisely.

Sure, sometimes an explicit prescription is necessary.

For instance, professional athletes or bodybuilders (in other words, people who make money off their bodies and athletic skills) use meal plans to prepare for training and competition.

A prescribed meal for someone in that situation might look something like this:

1/4 cup dry oats

3 oz turkey breast

1 cup steamed broccoli

5 almonds

1 omega-3 supplement

1 cup green tea (unsweetened)

But most of us don’t need that level of surgical precision.

We don’t normally eat “ounces” of things, or refer to food by their nutrients (like “omega-3 fatty acids”).

Instead, we eat foods like:

hamburgers

tacos and burritos

salads

pasta and noodles

sandwiches, wraps, pitas and rotis

stews and curries

cereal and granola

stir-fries

casseroles

Bottom line: If you want to eat better, you don’t have to get weird about things.

You don’t need to weigh and measure everything, or count out your almonds.

Ask yourself: “Is someone paying me to do this?” If the answer is no, you likely don’t need this kind of approach.

You just need to think about what you’re already eating, and how you could make it a little bit better.

This means fiddling and adjusting.

Making small changes and improvements to what you already normally eat and enjoy, one small step at a time.

Think about a spectrum of food quality rather than “bad” or “good” foods.

Welcome to the meal transformation game.

When you play with the idea of a food spectrum or food continuum, you get to experiment with variables like:

what you eat, and

how you eat it.

Think of this as a game.

How can you play “make this meal just a little bit better” in every situation?

In which situations is that easier or harder?

(Hint for coaches: this is a great game to play with the people you work with.)

Let’s transform breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Here’s how that “food spectrum” might look in daily life, with a sample day of eating.

Transforming breakfast

Stage 1

Let’s say that your go-to breakfast is a whipped-cream coffee drink and a chocolate croissant.

You pick it up in the drive-thru, and wolf it down on your way to work.

This is your starting point. It’s not “bad”. It’s just no longer working for you.

You’re getting indigestion from rushing, the croissant doesn’t hold you at all, and you’ve just spilled the coffee on your crotch while changing lanes.

Now your game is to improve your breakfast just a little bit, starting with what you already have or do.

Stage 2

Your opening moves in the meal transformation game:

You might replace the croissant with a whole grain muffin.

Instead of a “dessert in a cup”, you get a regular coffee with a single cream and sugar.

You grab a yogurt cup on your way out of the house for a bit of protein.

Naturally, you’re still rushed and busy… so you eat your breakfast with some distractions, while scrolling through emails at work.

But this is a solid start. Well done.

Stage 3

Next level of game play:

You switch the muffin to granola with cottage cheese or Greek yogurt.

You switch the cream in your coffee for 2% milk. (Or even go right to black coffee, you meal player you!)

You add some colorful fruit.

You’re now eating out of dishes on a table, instead of out of takeout packages off the dashboard of your car.

Of course, you’re still checking out the news headlines while you eat…

No problem. We’re keeping it real.

Stage 4

Now you are seriously playing like a pro.

You’ve changed “rushing and panicked” to “set aside a little extra time to enjoy a leisurely breakfast”.

You cleverly prepped an egg frittata with veggies in advance on your food prep day.

The coffee’s become green tea, since you noticed that too much coffee was tweaking you out.

The protein plus colorful fruit and veg have become the stars of the meal.

You’ve discovered you really like lemon water. (WHAT? You don’t even know you anymore!)

You eat mindfully, feeling relaxed, while watching the sun rise.

Ahhh.

Transforming lunch

Stage 1

At this point, starting out, the idea of a sit-down lunch feels flat out ridiculous.

“Eat slowly? Who has time for that during a busy workday? Grab a burger and go!”

Another “car dashboard” meal. Another stomach ache and regret.

You decide you might want to play with this meal too.

Stage 2

To improve this meal a little bit:

You go to a higher-end burger place where you’re pretty sure they use real meat.

You get a side salad with that burger, and maybe just a few potato chips.

You choose a diet soda instead of regular.

You don’t eat in your car, but you do eat by your computer.

That’s OK. You’re progressing.

Stage 3

At this stage, you’re doing a little prep work:

You whipped up some burgers in advance so they are handy and ready to take to work.

You also grabbed some nice cheese and whole grain buns from the local market on shopping day.

For lunch, all you have to do is take your homemade burger and its fixins to work.

You still grab a diet cola from the vending machine to wash it down.

You move from your desk to the lunchroom, where you socialize with co-workers. This slows you down a bit and helps you digest and relax.

Stage 4

You’re having the burger without the bun, alongside a nice pre-prepped salad.

Instead of staying at your desk or in the office, you take a break.

You sit outside and get some fresh air while you enjoy your meal.

For a drink, water’s all you need.

Transforming dinner

Stage 1

It’s 8pm. You’ve just gotten home after an insane day at work.

All you want to do is put food into your face and zone out in front of the TV.

You can’t even imagine making anything more complicated than boxed macaroni ‘n’ cheese right now.

Ketchup and hot dogs are as fancy as it gets.

Stage 2

Same concept, but:

You’re adding some extra protein with the help of a rotisserie chicken leg that you grabbed at the grocery store on the way home.

You’ve added a side salad, just grabbing a few handfuls of pre-washed greens out of a bag.

You’ve whipped up your own pasta.

Work is still on your mind, and a couple drinks will take the edge off.

Stage 3

Things are getting fancy.

You’re upping the protein with a little more chicken.

You’re having a little less pasta.

You’ve also added a nice big salad to the mix.

You’ve cut the booze to 1 drink.

Plus, you’re sitting at the dinner table, instead of flopping down on your couch or standing over the sink.

Stage 4

Again, we’re playing at pro level here.

With your meal planning and prep strategies, even a weeknight dinner looks good.

You can whip up a delicious salad in 3 minutes flat and you have some pre-cooked quinoa on hand.

That rotisserie chicken is still a fast, convenient option, but now it’s got some healthy buddies.

You’re indulging in a single glass of good wine these days, and you take time to savor it.

Meal transformation is not about reaching perfection.

If you’re at stage 1, all you have to do is shoot for stage 2. Or stage 1.5.

If you’re in stage 2, play with getting to stage 3.

And if you’re stage 3, heck, you can stay where you are.

You might never get to stage 4. Or it might only happen at times when you’re relaxed and have a little extra time.

Stage 4 might only happen on Sunday night, whereas the rest of your week is a mix of stages 1, 2, and — if you’re super lucky — 3.

And that’s OK.

How far you progress along the continuum all depends on what YOU want, what YOU need, and what YOU can reasonably do, right now.

Over time, things can change.

Play YOUR game.

Success secret: Have a food prep ritual.

You might look at these photos and think, “How can people possibly do all that?”

One success secret: Having a food prep ritual.

The idea is simple:

Practice planning and preparing healthy food in advance.

This makes healthy eating convenient and easy.

It also makes decisions easier: You don’t have to make a choice when you’re rushed and hangry.

Your food prep ritual can include:

shopping (or arranging to have food delivered)

menu and meal planning

washing and chopping vegetables

cooking/preparing protein (e.g. cooking up some chicken breasts)

cooking meals in bulk (e.g. casseroles, soups, stews, chili)

preparing the dry ingredients for things like Super Shakes or healthy muffin mix

soaking grains/beans beforehand so that they’ll be ready to cook later

sorting foods into smaller containers or baggies

freezing and refrigerating food for later

planning healthy meals that someone else cooks (e.g. using a meal delivery service, deciding in advance what to order at a restaurant, etc.)

looking ahead to ensure healthy eating strategies during the next few days, especially during difficult times (e.g. a busy week, traveling, dealing with a family crisis, etc.)

Mix and match any of these to find what works for you.

Experiment with systems, skills and strategies that work for YOU and YOUR life.

The real goal of a meal plan is to stop using a meal plan.

Fit, healthy people who have a good relationship with food don’t need other people to tell them exactly what to eat at all times.

Living a fit and healthy life doesn’t require perfection, either.

If you are using a meal plan:

That’s OK.

Keep it short-lived.

Meal plans are supposed to be temporary, working towards a short-term goal.

Keep it real.

As much as possible, try to make the meal plan fit your real life, not the other way around.

Remember all goals require trade-offs.

If you want to achieve a high level of performance or exceptional body composition, understand what you are prioritizing and sacrificing.

Getting very lean, for instance, comes with costs.

Make sure it’s working for you.

If your meal plan is making you feel:

overwhelmed

anxious and fretful

guilty

regretful

bad

overly rigid and/or preoccupied with food…

or any other negative, unproductive emotion…

…and if you find that meal plans result in you:

“falling off the wagon”, hard

getting obsessive and compulsive about food

restricting foods and food groups, or

doing “all or nothing”, usually ending with “nothing”

…then consider trying another approach.

What to do next

1. Consider where you sit on the spectrum of meal “stages”.

Where’s your food game at?

What level are you playing at?

What level would you like to play at?

Given your goals and your current situation, what is realistic?

For example, if you currently eat at stage 1, your goal might be to eat at stage 2 for most meals.

Or, if you eat at stage 3 most of the time but find yourself dipping into stage 1 or 2 meals more often than you’d like, aim to stay at stage 3 a little more consistently.

(Hint for coaches: you can walk people through these questions and help them arrive at their own answers.)

2. Start small. One step at a time.

Pick one meal to transform and focus on that.

For instance, you might leave all your other meals at stage 1, and focus on getting lunch to stage 2.

Concentrate on improving that one meal each day.

Using the examples above, you might think about things like:

adding protein

adding veggies or fruits

eating less processed food

eating more nutrient-dense, whole foods

drinking less alcohol or fewer sweet drinks

drinking more water

eating in a calmer, more relaxed setting, and/or

eating more slowly and mindfully

Of course, don’t try to do all these at once.

Try just fiddling with one or two, and see which ones work best for you.

3. Add things slowly.

Once you’ve improved one meal a day, try another.

If you feel like lunch is a solid stage 2 or 3, play with moving breakfast, dinner, or snacks along the spectrum.

Or, once you’ve improved one factor in a meal (e.g. adding more protein), try another.

For instance, if you’re getting more protein, now try switching out your sugary soda for some soda water. Or adding a little more veggies.

Be patient; small steps add up.

4. Set yourself up for success.

Notice what makes it easier and simpler for you to eat better.

Then figure out how to do or get more of that.

For instance:

Is planning helping you? How could you do more of that?

Is a healthy meal delivery service making it easy? Could you set aside a little more cash to get two meals a day instead of one?

Is setting aside time on Sunday afternoon to cook some protein a good idea? Great, keep on doing that. Book it in your calendar.

There’s no “right” way to do this. Do what works for YOU.

5. Enjoy your meals.

Meal plans don’t usually address how you eat.

Before you change what you eat, you can also try changing how you eat. For example, you could:

slow down

breathe between bites

relax

savor your food

sit at a table if you can, and/or

use real dishes if you can.

Give yourself some time and space to appreciate those tasty concoctions you put together.

Meal time is YOUR time.

6. Work towards being your own boss.

Sometimes you might just want someone to tell you what to do.

That’s fine, and helpful, especially if you’re juggling a lot. But only for a while.

Over time, look for ways to help yourself intuitively and wisely make better choices, rather than just following the rules.

(Coaches, much more than serving up prescriptions, this is your job too: to help the folks you work with arrive at a place where they feel good about making decisions for themselves.)

Think long-term. What do you want to happen over the next few months? Year? 10 years? Do you want to be on a meal plan for the next few decades?

Today, if you were to take one small step towards the “better” end of the meal spectrum, what might that look like?

How can you start playing the “meal transformation game” today?

If you’re a coach, or you want to be…

Learning how to coach clients, patients, friends, or family members through healthy eating and lifestyle changes — including helping them with meal transformation — is both an art and a science.

If you’d like to learn more about both, consider the Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification. The next group kicks off shortly.

What’s it all about?

Developed over 15 years, and proven with over 100,000 clients and patients, the Level 1 curriculum stands alone as the authority on the science of nutrition and the art of coaching.

Interested? Add your name to the presale list. You’ll save up to 33% and secure your spot 24 hours before everyone else.

We’ll be opening up spots in our next Precision Nutrition Level 1 Certification on Wednesday, October 3rd, 2018.

If you want to find out more, we’ve set up the following presale list, which gives you two advantages.

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