i don't know what autistic person needs to hear this but they are not watching you. the entire world is not constantly waiting for you to do something weird and laugh at you behind your back. you do not need to constantly self-police whenever there's the slightest chance another person might see you. you have a right to be your autistic self in public spaces. stop fighting yourself for their sake.

Autistic MC with Beel & Belphie

(CW!:) Belphie is selfish and manipulative as always, it's not really a healthy relationship even if it's a loving one. Stop reading at "He's the voice" to avoid it, though Beelzebub is also there to balance it out.

The same disclaimer for the previous set of autistic MC HCs applies.

This is not a even a remotely good indicator for self-suspecting autism and plenty of these things could easily be relatable to allistics, even the most mentally healthy neurotypicals.

So of course everyone is free to enjoy and relate to it! ^_^

Beelzebub:

Get ready for the best damn hugs of your life! Whatever way you want to be hugged, Beelzebub will deliver, anytime and anywhere.  Well, unless you want to be bigger or even just the same size as the person hugging you, but Beel's devoted enough to try to find a way to shrink for a bit if that's what you really want. Plus, think about how much bigger food would be in comparison!

Speaking of food, if there's any kind of texture you don't want to eat, or any other restrictions of course, Beel is more than happy to do it for you. He'll even pretend to steal it off your plate and let himself get lectured for it if you're in a situation where someone is trying to force you to eat something. Though he does try to make sure you're getting enough nutrition himself.

Beelzebub will always ensure you have something you can eat to the best of his abilities. He wouldn't mind ordering takeout or picking something up together afterward at all. Hell, you'd probably catch him trying to go out during a massive storm for one of your snacks. He always tries to have your favorite foods on hand just in case, even if it means constantly having to replace them because he can't resist the idea of sharing something you love. Beel also understands that all of smacking and chewing can be sensory hell even for "normal people," so he'll always give you a head's up before eating so you can put your headphones on and try to eat before hanging out with you if he can. Belphie will also happily give you the food off of his plate any time you want it, but he does the same for Beelzebub and is a bit of a picky eater with a low appetite himself, so do make sure he's eating enough when Beel is distracted.

He's also a great cook and a very patient teacher that'll eat any and all failed attempts, so he'd be more than happy to try to help you improve your cooking skills if that's something you struggle with. Beel's definitely the kinda guy that'd put all the knives out of reach if you really struggle with your motor skills though, and would only let you start peeling/chopping with safety gloves on. He doesn't mind taking on all the steps that give you a lot of trouble either. Even just staying with him as he cooks, keeping him distracted, and reminding him that he can't eat it all is more than enough to keep him happy.

Beelzebub is very intrigued by the concept of chew necklaces if you use them. He may or may not have tried one of yours he saw lying around. …It didn't end well. He basically impaled it on his massive teeth on the first gentle bite. It didn't even taste like anything either. He really can't see the appeal of it at all… You'll have to explain to him that it's just for the feeling of chewing, not actually eating, to help keep you from biting things you shouldn't. When you put it that way, he really sympathizes. Beelzebub actually thinks it's really cute that you kind of have something in common like that. Needless to say, he definitely fights for your right to keep it on you when you need it.

And if anyone has a problem with you or your needs? They have a problem with Beelzebub, and anyone who has a problem with Beelzebub has a problem with his brothers. Beelzebub's been the glue holding the family together for centuries and he'll gladly be the glue holding you together if you'd let him. He's incredibly patient with stuttering and does his best to protect MC from their harmful stims. He'll actively encourage, or rather almost force you, to take it out on him instead. Go on, don't worry, you'll break your own bones before you give him so much as a tiny scratch or a bruise.

Beelzebub is very empathetic when it comes to the people he cares about, and the most emotionally intelligent brother by far. He'd prefer for you to come and try to communicate with him when you're feeling down or overwhelmed before it becomes a big deal and would try to encourage you to do so, but he's always keeping an eye out and ready to intervene. If you're the kind of person that shuts down and needs to be left alone? He'll immediately put Belphie into a headlock, prying him and anyone else away if need be. He'd do his best to help encourage healthy habits and slow but steady growth, not allowing anyone to shove you into something you're not ready for, even if that day may never come. He's also very much able to sympathize with feeling "worthless" due to not being able to do as much as other people and feeling "slow," and does his best to try to keep you from feeling the same way.

Beel's also a great listener and almost always happy to just hang out, regardless of whatever it is y'all are doing together, so he's by far the best one to go to when no one else shares your interests. Feel free to chatter on about it on his back while he does his push-ups or while y'all are doing chores together and he'll surprise you with how much of it he retains and tries to bond with you over. He'd love for you to at least come to his most important games and would try to make it as accessible as possible, but he understands that it's not always enough. Do be sure to support him in your own way though, he'd very much appreciate it! 

Belphegor:

Who needs a weighted blanket when you have Belphie? Probably most people tbh, considering blankets don't have horns or thorny tails and don't actively resist being moved around or, god forbid, being left behind. Belphie's extremely clingy and tactile by nature when he likes someone, and he doesn't handle rejection very well. Which is definitely something that's an issue when you have sensory issues and can't stand the feeling of someone's hair or breath on you, or even any kind of touch at all (even through thick clothes and blankets) most of the time.

At least he can always guarantee a good night's sleep regardless of any noises, stressors, or changes in routine; so long as you trust enough to let him use his powers on you anyway. He promises getting addicted to his magic is mostly harmless, as long as you always keep him around and never ever sleep without him again. He'll let you come running any time you need his soothing voice and powers to help calm yourself down, actively encourages you to let him free you from your physical prison as often as you'd like.

But feel free to be as blunt about your boundaries as you need to be. It's pretty much the only way he'll listen, and he's fairly used to it after spending an eternity with Beelzebub anyway. He'll learn to adapt to your limits so long as they apply to everyone.  While Belphegor may not be anywhere near as kind or empathetic as Beel is, he's still very devoted to the very few people he chooses to let in and catches on quickly. He will listen if you tell him if you need to be left alone in complete and utter silence when you start getting overstimulated, though he'll also say it doesn't count if he's just passed out in the corner (even though it very much does) at first. You don't have to worry about softening up your sentences and micromanaging your tone with either of the twins really, they're both the "actions over words" type and won't overthink it unless you are the kind of person to be passive-aggressive. Even then, he can when you're just being blunt vs intentionally hurtful, though he'll definitely use it to his advantage against his "rivals." Belphegor would probably (playfully) give you some shit for it at first, but he's just being a dick, as is his nature, and will drop it the second he notices it hurts you, (if it would), once you two become close.

Similar to Satan, Belphie also automatically explains anything he knows you won't/didn't get, though only if he feels like it's necessary and in a much more arrogant manner by default. He's actually not being condescending on purpose for once, it just comes so naturally to him that he doesn't always know how to explain things and he's already used to doing most of the critical thinking for Beelzebub. God forbid anyone else talks down to you though, he's just as protective of you as he is of Beelzebub, if not more so.  He has his blind spots, but he won't force you into anything that would cause real distress and will intervene if someone else does. Especially if that someone is Lucifer or Diavolo.

Belphie's still his lazy, bratty self, but he does put more effort into maintaining his schedule if he knows it really stresses you out, and he'll gladly take the blame for "forcing" you to sleep through any and all events you'd hate to sit through. He's the voice that's always telling you that it's okay to not even try, that it'll never be anything but stressful no matter how hard you try and that's okay to just let it go. To just let him handle everything and try to relax. "Why bother trying to explain your issues to someone who will always see it as an excuse?" and etc. It's done with mostly good intentions, as good as a demon could ever have anyway, but he is very much an enabler of the worst kind, similar to Leviathan, and could easily create a very codependent relationship where you slowly start to lose your skills and built-up tolerance until you're left more disabled than you were before. 

It's actually one of the only things the twins ever seriously fight over, as Beelzebub disagrees with his approach and knows he's just making things harder for you in the end. He's very much of the belief that loving someone means helping them become their best, most healthiest self whereas Belphie believes there's no harm in letting you become as dependent on them as possible, because they'll always be there to help you. Beelzebub still believes a bit of suffering is healthy and necessary to improve regardless, and Belphegor still believes you should be able to avoid anything that makes you even slightly uncomfortable (unless he's really set on something) even if it makes it harder to cope in the end, regardless of how many times they argue. In the end, whether or not you fall to temptation completely is your choice, even if Belphegor will do his best to convince you he knows what's best for you.

I had wanted to get this out for their birthday, but Belphie is such an ass & I know this kind of HC doesn't actually make me feel reassured unless the characters are actually in-character, but I know it's the exact opposite for what seems like most(?) people & I didn't want to advertise comfort just for it to upset everyone, but… : / I can't write pure fluff with anyone but Beelzebub anyway tbh, and it's a bit of a struggle even then. Ngl, Beelzebub, Satan, and maybe Mammon depending on the MC (if they only date him) are probably the only ones any MC could realistically ever have a halfway healthy relationship with imo. (And I'm purposely excluding Simeon and Solomon from this list.)

(( Introduction Post ))

(( Hello ! I'm @cryptic-eccentric and this is my roleplay account for Dani from the show Danny Phantom. This blog will be treated as if it were her own blog. Anyone is free to interact regardless of what fandom their character is from or if they're an rp blog or not. This is just for fun so I'm not planning on sticking by a strict canon or anything. All OOC text will be denoted with double parenthesis. IMPORTANT NOTE: Some of the content will involve some heavy/darker themes mostly due to the nature of the character. A more detailed list of potential triggers has been put under the read more of this post.

Further information under the read more:

Admin Info:

Hi my name is Silas, I’m a 24 year old autistic trans man who uses he/him pronouns exclusively. [ Here ] is the link to my main account. I have at least a decade of roleplay experience but I’ve been a little out of practice recently. I am very excited to make some new pals. I also have a few ocs you can read about [ here ]. Feel free to dm me either on here or on my main if you want to discuss story line ideas or if you’d like my discord.

Tags:

#roleplay & #danny phantom rp - on (almost) every post #poetry - for in character poems #ooc - for out of character posts #reblog - for non-original and not directly roleplay related posts #kitty cats !! - appears with the reblog tag, on images/videos/gifs of cats #fungi - for posts relating to mycology #long posts - for extended roleplay threads #star trek - for posts relating to star trek #music - for posts relating to bands she likes #asks - for answered asks

Partner Info:

-> inevitablefuturephantom plays Dan Phantom -> therealvladmasters plays Vlad Masters -> sam-manson-blog plays Sam Mason -> danny-fenton-blog plays Danny Fenton -> sp724 plays SIdney Poindexter -> wes-weston-ghostly-blog plays Wes Weston -> tucker-foley plays Tucker Foley -> paulina-sanchez plays Paulina Sanchez -> ghosth8er-valerie plays Valerie Gray All accounts are tagged with the url, spaces replacing dashes when applicable.

Headcanons:

This version of Dani is currently 12 years old (~8 months chronologically), has been semi-recently adopted by the Fentons, is currently sharing Jazz’s room and is attending Casper Middle school as a 7th grader where she mostly has B’s, a couple of A’s, and one C. She is particularly fond of Jack.

She inherited some of Danny’s knowledge when she was cloned which has resulted in her being somewhat academically advanced in some topics but behind in others that Danny didn’t pay attention to.

Maddie and Jack were initially aware that Dani was “half ghost” but were lied to about why that was. They were told that Vlad Plasmius (the ghost, no relation to Vlad Masters) had conducted experiments on her against her will. Danny Phantom saved her and brought her to Jazz and Danny as her memories of her actual parents had been removed and he assumed the Fentons would be the best bet in helping her. They have been trying to find a way to permanently stabilize her. She has yet to tell Danny but she is considering revoking her ghost half so she can try to lead a normal life.

Vladco made a post claiming that their CEO, Vlad Masters, had made her in a lab. The Fentons are aware of this and, regretfully, so are all of her new classmates.

After reforming in D-Stabilized, the lenses in her eyes came back warped which caused her to develop astigmatism. She currently wears glasses. She generally wears boys clothes. She will eventually identify as aro-ace.

She loves The Beatles & The Talking Heads, mycology and mushroom identification, Earthbound, and Star Trek TNG.

She prefers to be called “Dani” but is okay with “Elle” in order to avoid confusion with Danny. She does not like being called "Danielle" much.

Boundaries:

Mostly any account can interact, this includes personal accounts, OCs and roleplay accounts from different fandoms. This is just for fun so no strict adherence to canon will be expected. The only exceptions are listed on my main blog’s pinned post. 

I will not allow for any heavy angst/gore or romantic relationships involving Dani though. Also like, just don’t be rude I guess.

Content Warnings:

•Heavy discussion of mental/emotional health struggles (namely identity issues, self esteem, PTSD) •Religious Imagery (sometimes appears in in character poetry) •Mentions of Child Abuse (incl attempted murder) •Mentions of bullying •Mentions of homelessness •Drugs and Alcohol (only during the Future!Dani Event where a 26 year old Dani came from the future)

here's my two cents on the recent overturning of roe vs wade:

as i'm guessing all of you know, roe vs wade is a law protecting abortion rights throughout the country (supported by 67% of people living in america), recently overturned after fifty years by these five shitbag "pro-lifers" of the supreme court (with, might i add, an average age of 61), three of which were appointed by our former president, donald trump:

amy coney barrett (nominated by trump): the woman who was appointed by trump in october 2020, going against ruth bader ginsburg's dying wish to wait until the election was over to replace her- also worth mentioning that she didn't know the five rights of freedom in the first amendment of the constitution

clarence thomas: an accused rapist who recently said that in light of the roe vs wade overturning, they should reconsider the laws protecting gay marriage, gay relations, and contraception i.e. birth control, plan b, condoms, etc

samuel alito: accused of sexually abusing a 14 year old, as well as writing against the majority opinion in the obergefell vs hodges case in 2015 (the one that legalized gay marriage). he also suggested that the reason that a team of nearly all white firefighters were denied promotions because of a plot between the mayor of new haven and a black preacher, which just. what

brett kavanaugh (appointed by trump): accused three times of sexual misconduct, one of which was him thrusting his penis at a girl while drunk at a party at yale, another of which he forced a different girl down on a bed, groped her, tried to take her clothes off, and covered her mouth so she couldn't scream for help until another man came into the room and stopped it

neil gorsuch (appointed by trump): voted in favor of the thompson r2-j school district in the thompson r2-j school district vs luke p. case, which was essentially the school district refusing to provide reimbursement for denying luke, an autistic boy, the education that he needed to be able to, quote, "generalize his skills", as well as voting in favor of UPS in the strickland vs UPS case which was when carole strickland accused UPS of being sexist towards her for making her attend one on one meetings with the supervisor telling her to do better even though she made 93-104% of her sales quota and there were many other people (men) in the office who were making less of their sales quota, not denied assistance when they made less than 100% of their sales quota, never called in to have meetings with their supervisor, and weren't counselled at all for poor performance

these five near corpses have made a single decision that will ruin the lives of millions of women (or anyone with a uterus) for decades. these so called pro-lifers are SO pro-life that they've decided that instead of letting you abort a literal fetus who cannot think or feel, they'll wait until the kid goes to school and let mass shooters kill them off because they refuse gun-control. these so called pro-lifers are so incredibly pro-life that they won't do anything to fix the dozens of problems in the foster care system. these so called pro-lifers won't provide paid maternal leave or free healthcare so that the mother doesn't have to work her ass off to pay for having the goddamn baby you forced her to have. these so called pro-lifers will force you to have a baby and say they care about it, until the baby's gay. or trans, or black, or jewish, or disabled, or anything that isn't a straight white christian abled conservative man. "but if the mother's life is in danger then they'll be able to get an abortion!" did you know that the only states to have an "exception" for abortion if the mothers life is in danger are texas, louisiana, idaho, and oklahoma? the laws state that in texas an abortion can happen if it is a "medical emergency", in louisiana it states that an exception could happen if there could be "death or a substantial risk of death", in idaho it states that an exception could happen if it would "prevent the death of a pregnant woman", and oklahoma states that an exception could happen if it was "in a medical emergency". all of these laws are so incredibly vague that it makes me want to slap the governor's of these states across the face. how about if a woman had a 20% chance of dying, texas? is that enough of an emergency for you? because the chance is never 0%, and it's never 100%. it seems to me that these lawmakers are so "pro-life" that they don't care that over 800 women die from maternity related incidents every YEAR. that's not very pro-life of you, is it?

this goes directly against the first amendment. if you don't know what it is, "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances." did you notice that it said "congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion"? let me put it in simple terms for the five dinosaur aged supreme court members who voted against roe; SEPARATE CHURCH FROM STATE. did you know that all five of the justices who voted to overturn roe are christian? this is not to say all christians are bad, far from it. but a hell of a lot of the political leaders who are christian sure like to reference what the second amendment says about "right to bear arms" but never seem to mention the first that tells them to get your fucking bible out of my rights. NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO GET AN ABORTION!!!! if you think it goes against the bible, cool! don't get one! no one is forcing it onto you! if it goes against your religion, okay. that's chill, but for the people who aren't christian? or the people who are but who interpret the bible differently? they can get an abortion if they want! if in the future i want to get an abortion, i shouldnt be stopped because "well the bible says this" because i am not a christian!! i do not believe in god!! and while pro-lifers talk about what the bible says, they completely ignore that other religions exist. judaism has a law that if the mothers life is in danger, they must abort the baby because the mother's life is more important than the unborn baby's. the pilgrims came to america for religious freedom, to separate from the laws that forced them to be apart of the church of england. freedom was always supposed to be the basis of america, and that includes the right to not be christian.

you talk of what the founding fathers would say, and this is my response: the founding fathers were a bunch of old white men from the 1700s that believed in slavery and didn't have running water. before you ask what the founding fathers would have wanted, put your smart phone down. turn off your electricity. turn off running water. get rid of anything invented after 1788. now, think: these were the conditions the founding fathers were under while writing the constitution. we've made a couple inventions since 1788, no? why shouldn't we have different opinions? just because they decided they should be the ones to write a paper that controlled everything that everyone in america did doesn't mean they were good people, or even decently smart people. slavery is bad, yes? well they sure as hell didn't think so. that makes them BAD PEOPLE. let me spell it out for you if you didn't pass the third grade, which i'm guessing a lot of the justices didn't: b-a-d-p-e-o-p-l-e

this was never about "pro-life" or abortion or saving children's lives. this was always about control, money, and now we're stuck in this dystopia of a country. are you happy now, amy coney barrett? are you happy that millions of lives around the country are now in danger because you wanted to save the lives of a couple of fetuses the size of literal jelly beans with no brain power? look at what you've done. i hope you live to see the day the consequences this will cause, cause there's going to be a hell of a lot of them.

this post goes out to the thousands of women who have died from at-home abortions. you can't stop abortions, you can only ban safe ones.

Funny kinda story of when my ex abuser pulled a neurotypical on me.

She found this song about dealing with the pain of learning to let someone go who does nothing but take, and not surrendering to them and blah blah blah, that she felt was soooo relatable, because she was convinced that all of her snide remarks, stonewalling, refusing to communicate, and weaponizing minor incidents/normal behaviors that she simply didn't like (like sleeping) to actively do bad things to punish us, and us, after fighting so hard to fix these things and not being good enough because doing the opposite (exactly what she wanted) caused her to be angry too, slowly not caring about all these pathetic gripes about how we need to be inhuman- when she refused to fix or change literally anything without kicking and screaming, replacing it with something worse, calling herself a toddler, or "reminding us" that she was too mentally ill to fix her behaviors (aka using excuses)- was all a case of her fighting to keep the relationship going and us not giving a fuck and taking advantage of her, and her learning to "let me go". So this brilliant person, who was already in delulu land about being the victim in the relationship, decided to just come up to me one day and go "idk why I really feel invested in this song and am obsessed with it, I think I need to share it with my therapist uwu 🥺"

And I, an autistic person who doesn't get subtle hints like this, was like "oh yeah that song goes hard. I've been listening to x thing". And it was at the time probably the same genre and concept because back then I wasn't allowed to like any music that wasn't self deprecating victim complex metal bullshit or else she would mock it and act like the superior emo (unless it was her, in which case hello 3-4 hours nonstop of American Pie). And I'm assuming this gave her the impression that I was competing with her on whether I was the "victim" or she was, and not actually "listening" to her sad little existence, so she pouted and gave me the silent treatment for the rest of the day.

And I didn't connect two and two until after we broke up and I randomly found the song again and focused on the lyrics, with fresh eyes of realizing that she literally thought she was some sort of suffering martyr the entire time.

Imagine making your whole personality some pretense mental health/neurodivergent advocate because it's helpful to act like that so as to take advantage of it and not take responsibility for anything in your life (except quitting cigarettes, apparently) but you can't even handle someone actually being autistic, and especially when we had talked about how I don't get hints like that multiple times because my parents did the same shit 💀💀 all i did was exist and I lived rent free in her head as some sort of specific villain that she had to vanquish, meanwhile I'm like "song good"

Typing quirks 

I have decided to do a post on typing quirks because I'm seeing more of them recently. So this is just my ramblings on this.

TQ = typing quirk

Now first of all, what are typing quirks? I guess it can be described as certain typing characteristics.  

TQs can be using random symbols or numbers for letters, replacing letters with other letters, random punctuation in sentences, and more. (I will not show samples as I can't read most of them) 

Speaking of not able to read them, that's the main argument against TQs. They're inaccessible to anyone with trouble processing words (dyslexics, autistics) and to screen readers. 

Now, why cause the trouble of accessibility issues? There's a couple reasons people who use TQs have given. 

Some people use TQs because they get joy from typing that way or it feels more natural. (often neurodivergents, not always) And some people just like the way it looks. 

It's also related to fandom cultures (Homestuck) and leet speak.

Some people claim it's ableist to use them at all, and some think it's ableist to tell people to drop them. But keep in mind some who use them are neurotypical.

For accessibility reasons, some users add translations. Translations are where they retype the TQ text in plain text. 

Translations are better than nothing, but they still aren't perfect solutions. A screen reader would still read the TQ text before the translation.

Also for longer posts, translations can add tons text to the post. This may make it intimidating to read for someone with trouble processing text.  

So what do I think on this? Are typing quirks always bad?

On this one I'm gonna take a middle ground. Feel free to use TQs privately with friends!

Online TQs are fine, but preferably add translations. At least give translations when asked.

Do not use TQs when using disabled or neurodivergent tags. That's just basic accommodation and respect. Don't even use it with translations.

But otherwise they're just harmless internet stuff. If you're willing to accommodate it's fine to use them, but you must be able to add translations.

Saw your most recent post on dhmis and tma and I've got opinions to say I believe Computers is an Eye episode because Colin's whole deal is stealing personal info and being smart but its not my strongest I see Jobs as a buried because while it doesn't involve much claustrophobia its more about harmful workplaces and overworking which ties in with the buried in a symbolic sense. I will argue so strongly Death is an End episode. The End is LITERALLY the fear of death smh. While I can see the argument its a Stranger because of Stain Edwards the theme of death is so strong that it isn't that relevant. I see Family as both Stranger and Corruption, Stranger because the whole episode feels very uncanny with the design of the family and set being a "real" place. It's also Corruption because the episode is about toxic family relations. I still cannot believe how you thought Friendship was originally a Vast episode. While I can see why you would assign it Lonely it's clearly a Corruption, it's literally about toxic friendships. Also bugs. Tbh i don't know what to assign to Transport my closest guess is Vast but my argument isn't very strong Electricity is a hard one, I don't think i can assign it to one entity. I think Electracey is a Extinction avatar because she's a robot and the "everything in the home will be plugged in and part of the electric family" line. I could see Charged Yellow being either Eye, Stranger or Extinction. Eye because he's want to find the truth and also green eyes, Stranger because Yellow gets replaced, and Extinction because he gets replaced using specifically technology. The power outage is probably Dark because darkness. Lesley is a Web avatar, I will fight you on this. She's controlling them, she's the literal puppet master. You said that Lesley isn't the main one pulling the string making her less Web aligned but I would argue that makes her MORE web aligned because she's knows she's not fully in control. I interpret becoming a web avatar as not only being manipulative, but accepting your lack of free will. As Annabelle said in 147, "let it never be said that I do not dance the steps I am assigned." Sorry this is long and probably sounds a little rude i just have very strong opinions on tma and dhmis have a lovely day

COmputer being eye was also on my first post but i removed it bc i didnt think it was part of the big Fear factor ? but the way you phrased it does make it work

jobs being buried makes sense too !! my main reason for it being spiral is just Duck calling everything out and then Also going weird ? and then going back to "this is all wrong" very strongly (also the episode is reminiscent of Sculptor's Tool to me with only duck pointing out how this is Odd)

death SHOULD be end ur right , i just didnt think anyone in dhmis seemed very scared of the Death there ? so i thought it wasnt very important but Yeah when you mention it its definitely end ty (Or desolation bc it also feels like . theyre more focused on the grief of losing someone n not the Fear of Death ? if that makes sense=? but i dont rly get the End and Desolation anyway so)

CORRUPTION FOR FAMILY IS SO RIGHT i think i considered corruption for it at one point but i second guessed myself enough to remove it again . and stranger never reallly seemed correct to me but it was the closest and i had no one to discuss with so i ran with it:sob:

IM SORRYY LSITEN OK i hadnt listened to tma in full when i made the first list. i just read the entities wiki page and heard season 5 ..!!!! honestly idk if i agree with corruption bc , while thats probably the deeper meaning of the episode (toxic friends) warren always seemed like just an autistic asshole to me so i never saw the whole . toxic thing ? and he never really actually seemed friends with any of them ?? yea taking advantage of their kindness but i wouldnt call it a toxic relationship bc there never Was a Relationship to me (probably factually wrong n im being ignorant here but its my list and blehh :P im biased towards warren) and im probably just forgetting something bc i havent rewatched it in a while but are there bugs besides warren (are worms bugs)?

transport i assigned Web bc red guy being like . aware of the whole They're Trapped There thing and trying to escape and Lonely bc they're trying to get to other people/ civilization/ community but are just . stuck ? and in some episodes the lonely just takes ppl to endless places that they cant leave (cul-de-sac is the only one i remember) and it just (again) reminded me of that

ELECTRICITY /SHOULLD/ be more than 1 or 2 very true but i just Really hate assigning more than 2 to these idk why ive set that rule for myself but it just feels wrong, disorderly and i dont like it . but yes i can see electracey being extinction (tbh i feel like teachers being avatars/ assinging them patrons/fears could be a whole other list itself) Charged Yellow being stranger i disagree. yes hes replaced but it feels more like . if s1 jon got replaced by s5 jon ? does that make sense ? I HAD DARK For this episode too bc the power outage but it didnt feel like a big fear factor here ? and i just didnt think it was significant enough (the dumb self-imposed rule) Lesley IS web coded i completely forgot annabelle for a second when i made this :sob: ive had too much michael on my mind and i thought being trapped wasnt enough of a theme here ? not like it was in Transport or like Dreams but yea it definitely should be Web

IM GLAD this is long i like hearing other ppls thoughts and input on this silly stuff (it did sound a little rude at times but dw i get it) I think at the end of the day the way we judge these is just Very different? Unless you disagree, i dont think the web series is this "up for debate" as the tv show is bc it just has . Less. There's maybe 3 lines at the start, then the teacher comes in and starts singing about what they embody, then the horrors and the end (only the last 3 episodes rly made me question which Power would be associated with them bc it kinda follows a plot so they could all a little be taken as web and lonely with red guy?) Theres just so many more ways the TV show can be interpreted. These could be judged on the Teacher, the Lesson, the thing that scares the characters, the thing that scares the Audience, symbolism/manifestations, etc. (i think i just went with whatever seemed the most relevant to me / what scared the characters ? but i was also being pretty inconsistent there lmao) i feel like there would probably have to be multiple lists or just one BIG list of everything that could count as one of the entities ? or maybe im blowing this out of proportion and its really simple for you, and only i struggled with this :,) either way it was fun ! and i think thats all that matters maybe the real dhmis tma entities assigning list were the friends we made along the way aww

Hello Michi!! Feel free to answer this or not, but what is it like for you to be an autistic person? I'm making/drawing/writing an autistic character and I'm gathering as much info as i can to not cross any bounderies/not be problematic/not be stereotypical. Thank you :)

thanks for asking! i'm really happy you're doing research :3 /gen

so, my experience isn't the same as every autistic person's of course, so if any autistic person doesn't relate that doesn't mean they're faking! we're all different ^^ /gen

i think that as a child, i would get angry REALLY easily, i couldn't control my anger well at all and my mom would just lock me up in my room to not have to deal with me

so, my first reaction would be to break stuff like my books and throw things like pillows across the room

but i've learned to control my anger a lot better now! sometimes i just take a bath and cry a little and i feel a whole lot better :]

i also feel like i can't really understand when people are being serious and when they're joking, my grandma sometimes makes jokes when talking to me and i don't really get if they're jokes or if she actually means it, yk?

i also play a lot with my fingers and can't seem to focus on one thing at a time; when a teacher is talking, i can't just look at them and take all the information, i always have to look at them while doing something else with my hands

so, to do that i focus on the main thing i have to do: listening to my teacher, but if i try to only focus on them i will eventually have thoughts that will distract me from listening because i always do two things at the same time (in this case, listening and thinking), so i play with my hands to replace the thinking part with something less distracting that allows me to listen

does that make sense? lolol ^^"

anyways, when i get interested in something i can't stop thinking of it, a new show comes into my life and i relate everything i do and see to it, seemingly being unable to get it out of my head

that's actually great for creating content, it's really easy for me to make drawings and headcanons when hyperfixated on that thing, but it's very common for me to have trouble sleeping because my mind can't shut up about my fave characters, i usually lay on my bed completely tired and about to sleep but then all the thoughts about my hyperfixation come all at once and i'm completely exhausted physically but mentally i can't stop thinking!! it has taken me hours just to fall asleep, or even close my eyes :(

and oh god!! the sensory issues!!! /neg

i remember being a 7 year old lil guy and scratching the (cement) wall of my room, oh god that made me want to pull my nails off!! i hate the texture of cement walls, i can't pass my fingers through them without biting my tongue and stuff, it's just such a terrible texture! it feels so dry!!

i also remember having trouble with putting on my uniform, i had (and still have) to use a white sweater that had a texture so bad that it would make me cry whenever my mom tried to put it on me! it's a dry texture similar to cement wall's, since i had to pass it through my head to put it on it would asphyxiate me! i simply couldn't stand wearing it, i usually go to school with a random black sweater and with my school's jacket over it (we have a sweater and a jacket with the logo and we can choose which to wear)

on the gender part, i think autism has really affected my way of interpreting it

like, gender is a social construct, and i get why people identify as women or men or non-binary or something else entirely, or maybe in between some of these, but it's hard to get it for myself, especially as a plural

you see, everyone describes knowing their gender in a very complex way, but i just see the words "boy", "enby", and "xenic" and they make me happy, and that's just it, yk?

but if someone asked me what a boy is, what an enby is, or what a xenic is and why i identify as such, i couldn't answer, because i just really don't know JDJSJKS

hmm, i think that would be pretty much it, i really can't separate myself from any of my disorders, they're simply part of who i am ^_^

thanks for reading, have a nice day! /gen

pinned post

TERFS, RACISTS, LGBT-PHOBES, PEDOS AND PROSHIPPERS, KINDLY FUCK RIGHT OFF!

(nsfw accounts as well but I'm not as angry at you. but if you post drizzile nsfw then get the fuck away from me)

edit: this post is outdated and will be replaced by an in-character post soon!!

yo! welcome to drizzileiscool, one of the only drizzile propaganda accounts to exist (that is currently still active at the time of writing this)

here you will see me post and reblog things related to drizziles, the best emo middle stage water starter from galar!

occasionally I will also post some things related to my personal life (as well as things that aren't drizziles due to this being my only blog and I want to interact with more people), but if you're only here for the funny persona 3 lizard, you can filter out #not drizzile

this blog is mainly sfw but I will occasionally post some mentions of suggestive stuff as well as a small amount of nsfw jokes (if they're funny enough to warrant me rb'ing them)

blog owner is a minor, please do not talk to me about anything nsfw unless it is related to the conversation

About the blog owner: I am non binary, use any pronouns, and im also bisexual and autistic. I mainly go by either drizzile or sig, but drizzile is preferred if you don't know me from twitter

i will also occasionally be a drizzile if it's funny

if you want to see more(?) of me not posting drizziles however, you can also follow my twitter at sigpuyopuyo

read my carrd btw

tags under the cut

not drizzile - personal stuff, as well as things that, y'know, aren't drizziles. reblogs of other people will not be tagged because I'm too lazy

ideas of drizzile - interesting ideas for different things I want to be real (but aren't)

drizzile is liveblogging - liveblogging things like games, shows, anime, and movies. will definitely clog up your dash so feel free to blacklist this

drizzileposting - pretending to be a drizzile or just interacting with pkmn irl blogs while I'm in character (this tag is no longer being used)

tw suggestive - mentions of suggestive stuff, as well as suggestive/nsfw jokes and memes (posts will probably be deleted if I feel like people don't want to see them, but I will gladly delete them if asked to!)

drizzile tagging tag - me creating tags (ironically this tag wasn't actually made by me lol. it was created by thatoneguy031) (too shy to actually tag you but if you see this congrats you made this tag)

hey future drizzile you should draw this - ideas of things I want to draw but couldn't draw at the time of posting

a Drizzile's Diary - the thing I wrote, originally just a small backstory thing for the (now gone) pkmn irl side of this blog. a human hears about a rumor at school that you can no-clip into the mystery dungeon universe, does exactly that, and wakes up as a drizzile with no memories and only the diary they were holding when they no-clipped. this is no longer canon to the pkmn irl side of this account

important - things that I consider important to this blog, such as announcements

tw politics - references to politics

vent - me being pissed off and depressed

I wish I had taken “Before” pictures, because the underneath-the-kitchen-sink was super disgusting.

Imagine an under-sink area that was disgusting to begin with, with cracked white melamine where the idiot previous tenant had overtightened a bunch of screws, and full of nasty gunge and bunches of grease-stained cleaning products and stuff.

When I moved in (ten years ago, woo!) I had just gotten the divorce papers signed and stamped and had moved here while the X stayed in our fancy old place, rent-free, with her midlife crisis downgrade, Neanderthal-boy.

Psychologically speaking, the technical term for my state of mind at the time was “FUCKED”, but the DSM-V clarifies this as “hot mess with a side order of grief, dejection, and treatment-resistant depression. Also an inglorious helping of self-pity”.

Recently, after years of uncoiling the hot mess, two autistic and depression related work meltdowns that had me on disability for a year and a half in total, a number of different treatments that didn’t work, one that nearly drove me to self-harm (eek!) one that FINALLY worked (you wouldn’t think it, but it was a new research project involving an intravenous ketamine protocol and if you send an ask I’ll be happy to oblige with that story), a bunch of self-care work a truly hip and fantastic psychiatrist, and a few supplements, I finally FINALLY found my SPOOOOOOOONS!

Like, energy, folx.

I found my GAS. My Giving A Shit.

It had returned.

I had enough energy to look around and start thinking about improving my environment, in other words.

It started with my daughter’s room about a month or so back.

She turned 18 a little while ago (yeah, poor kid han’t even turned 8 when all this horrible shot first went down) and moved into her own place with a friend so I took the opportunity to turn her mess (no judgment, it was just a regular teenage mess, nothing special, and I was not about to call her out on it because [gestures helplessly to rest of untidy place that I should have been cleaning had I the spoons] of a room into something she would enjoy coming back to visit anytime (and it would make a tidy guest room and bathroom area as well).

But today I found time to do something strictly for Me.

My kitchen.

And it started with wanting to put up some wall decals to brighten the atmosphere a little. But the walls and cupboards had a thin (cough, decade-old, cough) coating of neglectful grease on them that made me stop before I even got started.

So I pushed a pebble down a hill full of snow and yeah, it avalanched. Looney Tunes style.

No. Malcolm in the Middle style!

Https://YouTu.be/AbSehcT19u0

Wiping down a counter made me realize the spice rack had a greasy feel to it.

Cleaning the spice rack made me think of wiping down the backsplash behind it.

Which made me notice the microwave.

Which led me to notice the OVEN. (Ew).

And the oven and microwave lights needed replacing.

From like, ten years ago.

Cleaning a cupboard surface made me realize the side of the fridge was dirty. Cleaning the fridge made me realize the floor needed mopping and the grout was dirty and gross looking.

And from where I sat scrubbing floor tile. I noticed the sink.

Specifically, the underside of the sink.

And I REALLY should have taken a Before picture because no description I can provide will truly give it Justice.

But here’s a 1000-word substitute for what the upgrade looks like, and I’m sooper-proud of myself:

And the rest of the kitchen looks nice too:

And I even went to the hardware store to get new fluorescent lights for the main lighting because it had been too long since a couple had burned out and needed replacing.

And yeah, I didn’t forget the whole reason I started this avalanche of home care.

I even put up one of the new decals. (The onion, not the birds).

I just had a non-good day and I'm a little bit brown and maybe poisoned.

In my building there were THREE potassium permanganate incidents in one day!

The first one is on me. I dropped the open jar with a potassium permanganate solution (liquid) onto the floor. My colleagues cleaned the floor while I washed my pants and shoes. On our floor's main toilet. While in socks, underwear, shirt and sunglasses (photosensitively autistic) (told everyone my normal glasses had to b). They are still brown with manganese oxide because fuck me.

The second one was a consequence of my actions but in no way my fault. I wanted to replace the potassium permanganate I dropped so I go downstairs to buy some more of the purple solid. The woman at the desk takes the jar, walks to the back shuffles around for a while... 'Oh no!' She overshot by a lot. No big deal, she can sweep it up.

The third was the logical conclusion to the lab party of clowns. As I turn the cap I can hear it grind against the sand texture of the permanganate so I move over to the sink, it can handle mild chemical waste. I turn the cap more and open the jar to reveal it filled to the brim with purpleish black sand. It's all over the jar now, it's making a deep purple puddle in the sink, it. is. on. my. hands.

The strongest purple you can imagine. It won't come off. It will turn brown if in contact with an oxidizing agent. My skin can oxidize. The potassium permanganate is now reacting with my skin to manganese oxide, the brown rock chemical that will never wash out of my pants.

My hands are brown, I might be a little poisoned, my pants are ruined, and cleaning up my own mess took me a day. A colleague saw me bare-legged washing my pants in the sink and made smalltalk about lab accidents and the irreversible stains on my pants.

This was a bad day. But here is an assortment of potassium permanganate related thoughts:

ourple

Hvorfor er jeg lila

Braunstein :(

I am transitioning from william afton to purple guy to a 1800-1900s actor playing a slave

Kaliumpermanganat :(

Fuck potassium permanganate, copper sulfate is my favorite color now

Feel free to transcribe my purple text into greentext or make memes about my horrific experience as I will now enjoy my weekend to spite the permanganate!

I dont have any specific religious beliefs but I do think inanimate objects have something akin to what we would think of as a human soul but constructed differently in that human souls have death as part of their cycle due to emotions and such meaning they need to rest at some point whether permanent or temporary whereas the "souls" of objects cannot feel in a human way but still have their own meaning, but do not need rest in the way human souls do. Anyways whatever soul is in my pink dolphin plushie is older than time itself I think.

Hi! This isn't related to repairing clothes but rather the concept of 'slow fashion' and reduce/reuse as a whole.

I'm in need of some more clothes after gaining some weight (note: not plus-sized, just moved from Small to Medium, so it shouldn't be hard to find the right size) and I'd like to buy secondhand for sustainability reasons. The issue is, I have autism and I'm very sensitive to clothing textures - I know I prefer cotton over synthetics, but the individual feel of a cotton shirt can range from great to unbearable.

This is an issue because most thrift stores around me have closed their changing rooms/are not allowing customers to try on clothes beforehand, for sanitary reasons in the pandemic. (I'm not sure about the big chains like Goodwill and Salvation Army, because I'd rather not support them for ethical reasons.) Not to mention that buying secondhand clothes online (from sites like eBay or Mercari) might offer a greater selection but obviously can't try those on beforehand.

So my question is, is there a way to judge how a shirt might feel texture/fit-wise without needing to actually try it out?

Thanks in advance for any tips, I love your blog and all the help you provide :)

I'm autistic too, so I completely understand.

Shopping for sensory-friendly items:

Every person with sensory sensitivities is different, so I can't just tell you what to look for. A garment I find comfortable might be a sensory nightmare for you, and vice versa. What I can do is tell you how to figure out what to look for yourself.

What to look out for:

Go to your wardrobe, pull out your favourite items, and check their labels (if you've left them in). Note down two things: the brands that produced these items, and the materials they're made of.

Once you're done, take a look at the items themselves. What characteristics make them sensory-friendly? What characteristics do you dislike? Do they have elements you like to stim with?

Look at your list. Is there anything that pops up multiple times, be it a fabric, brand, or characteristic? Whatever it is, that's part of what makes that item sensory-friendly to you.

Look for items that check these boxes when shopping. Don't be afraid to look at the labels inside of second-hand clothes if you're in a physical thrift store (unless local Covid regulations say otherwise), and use the items on your list as search keywords when thrifting online. Most second-hand shopping apps have a search system that allows you to look for specific brands/sizes/materials/... If you don't know how to use these, look up a tutorial (like this Depop tutorial by Leena Norms, for example).

Once you've gotten a new item, take good care of it. Washing a garment the wrong way can alter its texture, and so can mending it.

If you still end up with a garment that doesn't feel right, check if you can make any alterations to improve it. Cut out the labels, replace itchy parts with a different fabric, wear it over a long-sleeved undershirt, remove a neckline or cuff if it makes you feel constricted,... It's your item and you can do with it whatever you want.

If all fails, you can always try reselling it and using that money to buy something else.

An example:

I know that items made of materials such as flannel, bamboo or chambray will always be sensory-friendly to me because those tend to pop up a lot in my wardrobe. Basic cotton is hit-or-miss for me depending on the way it's produced and washed, and sheep's wool is a no-go because I find it itchy. When I shop second-hand, I always keep an eye out for items made of flannel, bamboo or chambray, and when I need a warm knitted item I look for alpaca rather than sheep's wool because it's an itch-free alternative.

Going through my wardrobe, I realised there's a few brands that I wear more than others because they're always made of materials I personally find sensory-friendly, and they match my aesthetic style (Axes Femme, for example). When I need something new, I look for these specific brands on second-hand apps.

As for characteristics, I know I like loose or shirred items better than fitted items, and I hate turtlenecks because I can't stand how they cling to my throat. When shopping, I ignore anything with a turtleneck and look for loose items rather than fitted ones.

Conclusion:

It's possible to shop for sensory-friendly items without touching them, but it takes practice.

Once you've got some experience with handling fabric, you can sort of guess what an item will feel like just by looking at it. Sewing and altering clothes is a great way to develop this skill. You'll still occasionally bump into unpleasant surprises as you can never predict a 100% how something will feel, but this will happen less with time.

You can minimise the risks by getting to know both yourself and how clothes are made. I frequently thrift online and rarely run into issues any more because I know what to look for.

Markiplier manor is toxic here’s why

So Markiplier manor (Markipliers official discord server) has gotten a surplus of new people in it, this happened a few weeks ago the manor itself though has been up for awhile. originally a members only server it was eventually opened up for everyone and yes there are alot of genuinely good people and the mods are alright but unfortunately its becoming a toxic environment. 

SO EDIT i have discussed with the mods that being said ... im keeping this up as a reminder of we can do better we can help people who are struggling through something instead of shutting them down we can listen to people who are being oppressed and bravely point out new media that only worsens that oppression and stigmatization and not just the mods who i was kind of harsh towards but who are human everyone as a community can do better and this is a large community think of the work we can do just doing the basics like boycotting problematic content and helping those who cry out for it who need it (and noticing and shutting down manipulative/toxic behaviors) ... i dont know if im going to go back to the manor yet tho im going to let this sit give it a week yall can agree or disagree but know that if you try to be an ass your going to get shut down and your feelings are going to get hurt 

lets start with the basics “triggering topics” triggering topics can be anything in particular but it generally means a topic that relates to another persons trauma. Now while it is important to acknowledge a persons trigger words and try to keep the conversation respectable ive also noticed people use it to shut down people who come on freaking out because their dealing with a stressful situation/something traumatic just happened. This has happened to me personally and to a friend with me it was about being pro choice and having to in short make that actual choice. i was discussing this in the bathroom because i (like anyone else who comes in with baggage) did not know about any pro choice discords at that moment and was afraid of being stigmatized or going onto a discord that says its a safe space only for it to be filled with trolls. Mark manor is labeled as a safe space and many people come on there looking for support with me no one told me that the topic was triggering to them (which apparently it was because a friend of theirs had to make the choice not her herself think what you will) they just went to a mod early on when i just found the server as a member a friend (who i wont name) had gotten.... assaulted majority of her werent online and as someone who has been there and yes when she told me it did trigger my own trauma she needed moral support... the mod shut her down and deleted her comments and didnt give her a pointer to any other discord where she could discuss the topic openly and get moral support and be pointed to resources (it actually took me ten minutes to find and confirm a lgbtq therapy chat earlier this year for another individual discussing mental health) this was before i had gotten on for that day but i noticed those messages and i contacted her when she told me what was up yea it triggered my memories and its not fun but I FUCKING HELPED HER i made sure she went to the police to atleast file a statement (while the police dont always help it is good to have it on file) i even made her a plush and shipped it out to her and i would do it again and again because its not good to basically tell another person to shut up because it triggers others not without atleast trying to help them find another fucking place and making sure their actually ok and in a physical safe place  next is them claiming the manor is a “safe space” a safe space is by definition  “ a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm.” you would also think that the manor would be a safe space in the fact that marginalized and oppressed groups of people would be able to point out problematic content and have an open and free discussion about it and how it makes them uncomfortable. especially people of lgbtq community which alot of people in that chat are. yesterday (and this was what caused me to officially turn away from the server) in the patio (which is the members only chat) a Transgender individual pointed out the problematic content that is huniepop and how it fetishizes trans people as well as other minorities now this game i hear tries to make itself out as a “parody” .... its not its a sexual dating sim what would make it a parody is if sex noises were replaced with donkey sounds and the lewd pictures were replaced with poorly drawn doodles of tits or what have you its a game for incels marks hilarious when he plays it because he doesnt take the game seriously my issue isnt with him its with the developer. and if you did not know (which apparently people dont) the character poli is described as “a girl with a dick” the individual pointed this out because they felt like it dehumanizes them and paints them as nothing more than a fetish... and also apparently you can “choose” is poli is trans which kind of gives off the message that people can ignore trans peoples identity if it makes them uncomfortable... or if they dont sexualize them. and the muslim community is more or less in the same boat i come from the bible belt in usa im not muslim i am not trans but i do have a reason for standing with both and i will get to that in a bit so i was raised in a christian household in a christian setting like muslim women were basically told we cannot have sex and any sexual thought is sinful and we will be punished blah blah blah your even more closeted if your gay or bi because then you can face ... violence that being said to make the woman from the middle east hyper sexual like they did is kind of shitty even for a incel pleasing sex game. the individual who thought it would be ok to discuss this in the server because its labeled as a safe space and is generally “lgbtq” friendly thus believing he would have people agree and discuss ... was unceremoniously shut down by their peers and a mod was notified this person was not hostile maybe a bit frustrated because he wanted to talk about it and thought he would have this genuinely helpful conversation and people would listen and spread the word because to have problematic content be popular can isolate the oppressed group even more so WHEN NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO THEM. if a group of marginalized people notice something problematic with content and you claim to be an ally of said group then you need to acknowledge and support what they say. they told him to go to twitter where he could potentially be bullied and written off ... because again its an INCEL PLEASING SEX GAME.(which means incels if you ever dealt with them will go and say anything to justify the game even using slurs and bullying) and to put the icing on the cake to change the topic they brought up robin ... i actually dont know who robin is as i dont really focus much on youtube creators personal stuff (it feels off for me to not personally know an individual but know their personal stuff without having actually talking to them its weird i know its a thing i have in my head) but apparently they recently came out as female and good for them im super proud of him and the patio members were discussing how they were proud of him as well for beginning to wear makeup and making themselves more feminine which would be great if they werent trying so hard to shut down the trans male who was trying to spread awareness on problematic stuff .... something he pointed out ... and something they gaslighted and said he was being hostile. really its almost as if they only care about trans issues when its someone famous discussing them  so what can we possibly do about huniepop being transphobic and the answer is very easy BOYCOTT IT like... yall were up in arms and boycotted jk rowling with snap and a turn do we only cancel the old and ugly? do we only cancel those who we dont think is funny? mark is not at fault he probably doesnt realize it and any comments made on the issue are talked down upon or drowned amongst other comments im not saying to cancel him im saying to cancel the game HARD. ignore the posts bitch at the dev demand refunds for your game. like consumers have infinitely more power than corps want to admit.  so you basically have a community that claims to be a safe space but only if you want to talk about sunshine and rainbows and its highly hypocritical of them to claim safety.  another thing is emotionally abusive/manipulative people hide in the server and the mods dont ever seem to acknowledge it. i cannot tell you how many times ive gotten into arguments with people who seems nice then turn into assholes then claim to be the victim when i or others go off on them. if you recognize my name you know i dont stand down when it comes to having a snarky or rude comment thrown at me if your going to be an ass were fighting i dont care how nice you seemed beforehand and you dont get to call a mod just because i actually stood up for myself or others sorry not sorry dont be a bitch nuff said.  now why would i care so much about problematic content? why would i care and stand by the transgender and muslim people (aside from being ya know... an actual ally and not someone who claims it for sympathy and brownie points?) its because i am autistic i am also able to function well on my own but there is a movie created by the famous singer sia it is called music it is a movie frowned upon by the autisitic community because infantizes and dehumanizes non verbal autistic people i am fortunate and unfortunate in not having to deal with much stigma unfortunate because i wasnt diagnosed until i was 17 alot of answers about my behavior could have been answered if i had been diagnosed earlier but considering society loves the quiet timid female and i functioned “well” for neurotypicals i was ignored. so yea you bet your ass im standing with them and raising awareness about huniepop and their was this one person when i mentioned this point i cant remember there name nor to do i give a shit about them because when i mentioned how autistic people ... how i was in the same boat with music by sia (again i advise that no one target the actress who was under contract target sia and please boycott her so she knows she cant get brownie points or money for a movie that stigmatizes who she claims she wants to “help” (*cough* profit off of *cough cough*) and only serves as a feel good movie for neurotypicals and ignorant people)  they said “i heard people who hated the movie i heard people who found it alright people are ALLOWED to like problematic content” ... and like ... does anyone else see the problem here? its not hard at all to boycott celebrities for making content  and im going to repeat this point  IF A GROUP OF MARGINALIZED, STIGMITIZED AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE CALL OUT SOMETHING FOR BEING PROBLEMATIC AND YOU CLAIM TO BE AN ALLY YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO THEM AND DONT SHUT THEM DOWN I DONT GIVE A SHIT YOU DONT HAVE A FUCKING EXCUSE. if you cant bring yourself to boycott a piece of media and replace it with the infinitely more suitable forms that supports the group you claim to be for your not an ally your a fucking hypocrite  and that is why i left markiplier manor i am still a youtube special ... thingy member and i will continue to be a member to support mark i want people to overall listen to those who speak up against a creator and a piece of media and listen to us all no matter how “good” something seems. .. also there is a video called listen it was created by nonverbal autistic people  and communicationFIRST a group that sia apparently communicated with for her movie... and then ignored  https://youtu.be/H7dca7U7GI8

This is a post I’ve been thinking about making for quite some time, especially due to looking at how my own personal depiction of Viktor differs from what seems to be the general fandom interpretation - especially after the LoR cards released and gave us a few canonical acolytes.

I won’t beat around the bush here: this is going to be about why I personally believe that associating the Glorious Evolution specifically with headcanons about Viktor or his acolytes being trans, or Viktor performing gender-affirming surgeries, or things in a similar vein is a poor decision, and why I don’t include this interpretation in my writings. This isn’t meant to discourage people from writing Viktor or his acolytes as trans, of course - my Viktor is agender, although he’s not aware of it, and it would be absurd to say that his followers have to be cis - but I think it’s important to look at the implications that come from writing Viktor as explicitly someone who helps people relieve and manage their dysphoria through his work with the GE.

Firstly, no matter how you spin it: Viktor’s idea of the Glorious Evolution has always been painted in a negative light. I’ve done my work to portray it as idealistically as possible, but at the end of the day his goals have always been about removing (at the very least, negative) emotions from himself, as well as mechanizing himself and others.

“Desiring both to revolutionize his field and to eliminate the jealous human emotions which festered inside him, he engineered parts to replace and improve his own body... He saw himself as the patron and pioneer of Valoran's future, a future in which man would renounce his flesh in favor of superior hextech augmentations.” (Original lore.)

“He saw human involvement in any part of a process as a grossly inefficient aberration - a view that put him at odds with a great many of his fellow students and professors, who saw the very things Viktor sought to remove as the source of human ingenuity and creativity.” (New lore.)

“Jayce reported the incident [of Viktor creating a device that allowed someone to “effectively control” another person]  to the college masters, and Viktor was censured for violating basic human dignity - though, in his eyes, his work would have saved many lives. He was expelled from the college, and retreated to his old laboratory in Zaun, disgusted by the narrow-minded perceptions of Piltover's inhabitants. Alone in the depths, Viktor sank into a deep depression, enduring a traumatic period of introspection for many weeks. He wrestled with the ethical dilemma he now faced, finding that, once again, human emotion and weakness had stood in his way. He had been trying to help, to enhance people beyond their natural capabilities to avoid error and save lives. Revelation came when he realized that he too had succumbed to such emotions, allowing his naive belief that good intentions could overcome ingrained prejudice to blind him to human failings. Viktor knew he could not expect others to follow where he did not go first, so, in secret, he operated on himself to remove those parts of his flesh and psyche that relied upon or were inhibited by emotion.” (New lore.)

This, when combined with how Viktor has also always been intended as a more villainous character - his visual design language, voice lines, and how he leans into the “evil Russian scientist” stereotype all confirm that - mean that from an out-of-universe standpoint, we’re meant to see his ideas as wrong and misguided. Multiple other champions have lines specifically about how he’s wrong - Ekko calls him “everything wrong with Zaun”, Camille (who is morally grey at best, and a cold-blooded killer at worst) calls his work “quaint”, implying that it doesn’t go far enough for her liking, and Heimerdinger makes the point that without humans, no one will be left to appreciate Viktor’s work. It doesn’t matter if Viktor has good intentions - the narrative tells us time and time again that his path leads to a very dark place, especially in new lore where he’s comfortable with violating free will for the sake of preventing death.

It seems obvious to me that a character who auto-amputates as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, who decides that emotions themselves are a burden, who is repeatedly described as having an obsession with the Glorious Evolution regardless of lore, who is described as who you go to when you’re desperate in new lore... is clearly someone whose surgeries (at least of himself, where they are implied to be unnecessary - again, auto-amputation) and end goals are supposed to be read as a violation of human nature and dignity. Here we pivot to talking about trans issues in specific.

I’m of the firm belief that it’s not a good idea to associate gender-affirming surgeries, HRT, or any other thing used for transitioning with a character whose surgeries are supposed to be read as a violation of the human form. This plays directly into the anti-trans idea that transitioning is, well, a violation of the human form. It is not a good idea to write the man who cuts off his own limbs to poorly cope with his emotions as a patron of trans rights. It’s drawing a direct parallel between Viktor’s auto-amputations, which we are supposed to read as not only a very bad thing and the product of obsession, but arguably self-harm, with life-saving medical care.

(There’s also the issue that some people seem to assume that transhumanism is, in any way, inherently related to being trans - but that’s a whole other topic that I don’t feel very qualified to write on. I consider myself someone interested in transhumanist concepts, when applied appropriately (i.e. not ending up in eugenicist territory), but I am far from an expert on transhumanist thought. I think it’s enough to say that no, they’re not related. They’re just two things with the same prefix. Please don’t confuse the two.)

In my opinion, Viktor should not be seen as someone whose work is a direct benefit to trans individuals. (Again, not to say that Viktor can’t have followers who are trans. But please, please consider before making him the person that they go to for help with transitioning. The man doesn’t even have a medical degree, and his canonical work is described as being all about function over form. He’s not the surgeon you want.) I don’t think that Viktor’s gender identity, whatever it may be, should be associated with his obsession with the Glorious Evolution - or at the least, it shouldn’t be portrayed as a positive association. (In the sense of Viktor using the GE/his own surgeries as a positive affirmation of his gender... I’m struggling to precisely define this at the moment, apologies.) The GE is, textually, an unhealthy coping mechanism.

(There’s maybe something to be said for a Viktor who has disassociated himself so far from humanity that he no longer considers gender applicable to himself... but please, be careful if you write this. I’m speaking as someone who’s agender: I’m tired of my identity being used as shorthand for someone or something becoming or being nonhuman. I’m tired of people treating Blitzcrank being reskinned as a they/them pronoun user as something revolutionary, if they themselves don’t use those pronouns or aren’t nonbinary. I’m not going to pretend that I’m the arbiter of what people can and can’t write, but I’m tired of seeing myself - as an autistic and agender person - represented solely by unfeeling aliens and machines and whatever else, and being told that it’s good, actually, because any representation is good representation. I’d like for people to be more mindful in what they write and promote, but I think that this is becoming a tangent.)

I guess it comes time for me to defend my own depiction, then, since as I’ve mentioned above I do write Viktor as agender. I admit that I want to see aspects of myself in the characters that I like, but I also strive to be aware of the implications that these aspects may have. My Viktor’s gender identity has absolutely nothing to do with his idea of the Glorious Evolution - he has no dysphoria that he attempts to relieve through his surgeries, he does not see roboticization as a way to move past the gender binary... he doesn’t even realize that he’s not a cis man, because he hasn’t had the time or tools to introspect on that aspect of himself. (He’d be rather confused if you told him that people generally tend to feel as if they’re a certain gender - he’s just... himself.) I’ve written him in this way to try to make it clear that he has always felt this way about himself - that the GE has nothing to do with it - and that it has no influence on his actions as the Machine Herald.

There isn’t really a good way to wrap this up. Again, I am not saying that Viktor or his acolytes shouldn’t be written as trans, nor trying to stop people from writing that - only that their transness shouldn’t be directly associated with his idea of the Glorious Evolution. I think that we need to be mindful of what kinds of tropes that our depictions can fall into, and in this case a non-mindful depiction of Viktor as trans can seen as equating being trans to what’s easily read as self-harm/a violation of human nature. I doubt that anyone genuinely intends this association, but it can be made regardless, and so I prefer to keep the two concepts wholly separate in my depiction.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading. I’m willing to answer any questions that arise from this.

hi  i  think  it’s  important  to  clarify  that  i  don’t  hate  rick  entirely!  

i  enjoy  his  antics  a  lot,  i  think  he’s  very  interesting ;  the  complexity  of  his  character  isn’t  lost  on  me  just  because  i  happen  to  take  issue  with  some  of  his  behavior  and  choices  and  do  it  very  vocally---

nor  do  i  think  morty  is  a  perfect,  infallible,  angelic  character  who’s  done  nothing  wrong  ever  in  his  life.  between  the  two  of  them,  though,  morty  is  undoubtedly  the  better  person  and  i  personally  find  his  flaws  more  endearing  because  they  are  very  human  and  understandable  beneath  the  layer  of  sci-fi,  crazy  adventure  bullshit  they’re  veneered  with.  

he  suffers  with  anxiety.  he’s  traumatized.  he’s  struggling  in  school.  he’s  crushing  on  a  girl  hopelessly  and  unable  to  take  any  real  action  upon  it  due  to  a  lack  of  confidence.  until  recently,  he  was  something  of  a  pushover.  he  struggles  making  friends.  he  has  an  unspecified  learning  disability  (morty  is  very  likely  autistic).  his  family  is  often  very  indifferent  to  the  issues  he  has  to  contend  with.  although  he  tends  to  word  things  very  bluntly  and  thoughtlessly,  in  ways  that  can  make  him  seem  childish,  he  actually  takes  the  role  of  someone  very  mature  within  the  family  dynamic.  morty  is  a  good,  flawed  person,  with  a  tendency  to  fuck  up  and  make  mistakes,  but  he’s  always  trying  at  the  very  least.

jerry  is  a  hapless  manchild,  beth  is  largely  fixated  on  herself  and  her  dynamic  with  her  father,  and  rick  is  an  irresponsible,  uncaring  dick  who  endangers  them  all  regularly  in  the  name  of  thrill  seeking  and  engages  in  an  egregious  amount  of  manipulation,  gaslighting  and  emotional  /  verbal  abuse  of  people  he  claims  to  care  about.  

morty  and  summer  have  demonstrated  far  more  emotional  maturity  over  the  course  of  the  show  than  their  parents  or  grandfather  have:  see  when  summer  called  her  dad  out  for  being  a  closeted  racist  and  general  bigot  when  jerry  almost  got  his  kids  killed  as  a  result  of  his  cowardice  when  it  came  down  to  breaking  up  with  his  alien  girlfriend,  and  when  morty  snapped  at  beth  for  making  summer  feel  badly  about  her  appearance  and  neglecting  to  emotionally  support  her  when  she  needed  to  hear  words  of  affirmation.  the  two  of  them  were  happy  to  attend  therapy  and  asked  to  go  again  after  the  one  and  only  session,  only  to  be  ignored,  and  their  feelings  in  the  matter  utterly  dismissed,  while  their  mother  dropped  them  off  at  home  without  the  slightest  acknowledgement  of  that  request  to  go  and  get  drunk  with  her  father.  craving  his  validation  like  she’s  still  a  young  girl  comes  first  and  foremost  for  her.

there’s  also  the  incident  with  pluto  to  consider.  he  put  aside  an  opportunity  to  get  an  objectively  flawless  grade,  no  sweat,  with  rick’s  help,  to  instead  preserve  his  father’s  feelings,  bond  with  him  over  a  father - son  project,  and  attempt  to  bolster  jerry’s  confidence  in  himself  and  his...  intelligence.  a  fourteen  year  old  is  able  to  pick  up  on  his  dad’s  emotional  needs,  yet  so  rarely  has  his  own  ever  acknowledged  or  consistently  supported  within  the  show.  yes,  we  occasionally  see  boundaries  being  established  for  morty  when  it  comes  to  rick  that  beth  will  enforce  for  all  of  an  episode  or  two,  but  they  rarely  seem  to  be  lasting.  their  parents  are  highly  emotionally  immature,  and  the  children  of  such  parents  often  have  to  take  on  responsible  roles  from  a  young  age.  summer  takes  a  more  rebellious,  strong  stance  on  how  she  conducts  herself,  whereas  morty  tends  to  be  more  uptight,  no  nonsense,  anxious,  and  easily  agitated  by  being  dismissed  and  brushed  off  when  he’s  trying  to  help.

the  fact  that  he  can  be  forcibly  hauled  with  rick  on  death  defying  adventure  upon  death  defying  adventure,  to  the  point  of  staying  away  days  on  end  with  little  to  no  rest  and  full  on  sobbing  and  breaking  down  after  their  more  elongated  expeditions  without  his  family  seeing  fit  to  intervene  speaks  volumes  to  me.  he  cares  about  his  family  so  much  and  yet  they  so  rarely  seem  to  reciprocate  that.  summer  and  beth  have  both  expressed  admiration  for  and  often  seek  the  admiration  of  rick,  somebody  who  is  often  not  worthy  of  being  put  on  a  pedestal  and  looked  up  to.  morty’s  said  it  best:  he’s  not  a  hero.  not  even  close.  he’s  an  abusive  dickhead  who  occasionally  pulls  his  head  out  of  his  ass  and  does  the  right  thing,  or  a  good  thing.  but  two  people  in  his  family  see  his  objectively  terrible  traits  as  positive  things  ---  and  sometimes  even  he  feels  the  need  to  suck  up  to  rick  and  have  rick  like  him.

morty  can  be  perverted,  whiny,  and  stubborn,  and  as  i’ve  said,  he  tends  to  fuck  up  and  makes  mistakes  a  lot.  his  judgement  can  be  incredibly  poor  sometimes.  but  he’s  rarely,  if  ever,  malicious  with  his  intentions.  (probably  the  worst  thing  he’s  done  morally  is  the  love  potion  thing.)  

he  places  the  value  of  other  lives  and  other  feelings  above  his  own,  always.  he’s  a  character  worthy  of  being  rooted  for,  he’s  a  character  capable  of  being  better  than  his  worst  traits,  yet  he  generally  gets  put  down  for  bitching  about  things  that  are  perfectly  understandable  for  him  to  be  upset  and  annoyed  over. 

the  same  can’t  often  be  said  for  rick.  but  since  old  man  fuckers  want  to  suck  his  cock,  he  gets  countless  free  passes  on  all  of  the  shit  he  subjects  his  family  to.  he  has  relatable  issues,  too:  his  depression,  his nihilism,  his  self-destructive  tendencies.

but  they  manifest  so  much  better  for  me  personally  in  a  character  like  morty,  who  tries  so  hard  to  be  better  without  fixating  on  how  pointless  it  might  be  and  how  replaceable  the  people  in  his  life  are.  the  universe  constantly  punishes  him  for  being  unselfish,  for  giving  a  shit,  and  yet  he  still  tries.  that  is  admirable.

rick  is  good  sometimes,  and  i  enjoy  his  character  massively  when  he’s  not  being  an  extreme  dick,  when  he’s  joking  around,  and  caring  about  others,  and  helping  out  his  family.  but  for  the  most  part,  he’s  a  piece  of  shit,  and  people  who  pretend  he’s  not  are  genuinely  aggravating.  being  the  most  intelligent  man  in  the  multiverse  isn’t  an  excuse  to  be  a  condescending  prick  to  everyone  you  stumble  upon,  to  only  help  yourself  out  at  the  best  of  times,  or  to  be  indifferent  and  inherently  abusive  toward  the  family  that  3/5  members  of  clearly  want  you  to  love  and  care  about  them  just  like  they  do  you.