#i'm an underachiever — out. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

worriedvision · 1 year

Note

What if Al haitham has been working on a difficult mission so he has unpurposely been neglecting reader. This makes us think he has grown tired of us and is moving on. Kaveh then finds us upset at this and get mad at Al haitham and goes to argue with him. Maybe at the end Al haitham apologizes and comforts us !!!

Gender neutral reader, tagged as angst, happy ending.

You and Alhaitham were often away from each other, work duties giving you little spare time to spend with each other. After the honeymoon phase of the relationship, you realised you rarely saw him. When you were together, he did show you affection the way you did for him, but a few months in, and you started having arguments. The last argument you had together before Alhaitham had an especially taxing argument, and while you both resolved it, you carried the weight of it with you.

You had made a small comment, saying you always looked forward to seeing your boyfriend after work. You didn't like your work, but it brought in the rent money for your place. He then started to make comments, saying how you need to put your spare time to better use, which you totally get. After you agree, however, he starts telling you that you need to be working elsewhere. Somewhere where you'd 'make a difference' or you'd 'feel more fulfilled'.

You both had a talk about it, and when he went away for his work, you looked forward to the usual schedule.

A few months landed up passing, and you only saw Alhaitham in passing. It was clear he had a lot of work to do, and you knew better than to surprise him with a visit. You couldn't help but feel like you were losing him, not seeing him as often as you used to, and your mind starts thinking back to that argument. In your mind, you thought that Alhaitham had been fed up with an underachiever for a significant other, and he couldn't stand the thought of spending time with you. He must have been fed up with you just being boring with your work, and complaining about how boring work was.

You tried to visit his house, several times for that matter. No answer every time you knocked. Not even Kaveh answered the door, and you remember he was away for his own work.

You try his door one more time, calling his name out, and you hear a set of footsteps behind you. Turning around, you see Kaveh.

"Oh, a pleasure to see you, _." Kaveh states. "I was hoping you knew what your boyfriend, and my lousy roommate, had to do with the recent events at the Ake-" he looks at you shocked when he hears you sniffle. "Oh, uhh, have you two... You know..."

"I don't know." You pout. "The past few months, we haven't spoken once. Kaveh, am I unworthy of having him in my life?" You ask. "Oh, what am I going on about. Here I am venting about my uncertain love life to you, not even asking you how your work is going."

"My work has been good." Kaveh brushes off quickly, keeping on the topic. "If I'm honest with you, I don't think Alhaitham is the best with romance. He is purely academic, he solely works based on logic." Kaveh tuts, crossing his arms.

"He's probably already moved on from me, it's been so long and I haven't spoken to him. I ought to start as well." You sigh, turning to walk home and cry yourself to sleep yet again.

"I'm going to make your boyfriend realise he's been neglecting you." Kaveh uncrossed his arms, storming off. "The imbecile took my set of keys."

Alhaitham calculated the likelihood of Kaveh storming in, demanding his set of keys after he had taken both sets of keys to tick him off. Turning, he fails to hide his smirk as he spots Kavehs telltale fury.

"You made your significant other cry, Alhaitham."

That wiped off the smirk, the comment completely catching him by surprise. Kaveh laughs in disbelief, knowing that he hit the nail on the head. Alhaitham had unintentionally been neglecting you, plunging himself into this project he decided needed to be done. Kaveh still didn't understand why you weren't at least occasionally talking to him, but this is Alhaitham.

"What, were you expecting me to demand my set of keys? Truth be told, that was what I was going to do, but then I happened upon your lover crumbling right in front of my eyes." Kaveh laughs out. "You know what they said to me? They asked me if they thought they were worthy of being in your life. If you ask me, you're a loser and they can do better for themselves."

"I think you and I both know I am not a loser."

"Academically, you're 'cool'. Emotionally, you're a dick." Kaveh spits out, Alhaitham still not sure what to say. "If your lovers thoughts are correct, and you have already moved on from them, I'm going to make my move."

"Hey, how could you do that?"

"Give me my set of keys, and I promise not to make a move until you iron things out." Kaveh states. "You'll find them at home, but I'm not sure they'll hear you over their weeping."

Alhaitham tosses Kaveh his set of keys, putting his paperwork away before rushing out to get to your house.

You heard someone knocking on your door after you changed into your nightwear, in bed, and eyes red and puffy. Hoping they're going to just come back tomorrow, you bury your face into your pillow. A more persistent knock is heard, and you groan out before trying to clear up your face. One more knock, and you yawn before getting to the door. You didn't know who it was going to be, your best guess possibly being Kaveh asking to sleep on your couch.

Opening the door, you're met with your boyfriend. Before you can fully process it, he's in the house and closing the door behind him. He places the bag of ingredients down, holding you in his arms and whispering apologies for neglecting you. He was going to cook dinner for you, to help you find a happy you enjoyed, but his priority was reassuring you that his feelings never died.

After you calmed down, he explained that he had a big project he had to work on. A highly important one, one where it resulted in a gods freedom, and he just had to find people to fill the now vacant spots. Afterwards, he would be able to spend a week with you.

#gender neutral reader #genshin impact imagines #angst #alhaitham #alhaitham x gender neutral reader #alhaitham x reader #kaveh

561 notes · View notes

cagedchoices · 4 months

Text

HAPPY HOLIDAYS to those who celebrate, and happy weekend to those who don't! Hope you're all having a good day but if not, I've got positive vibes to spare, I'm sending my love to you ❤️🤍💚❤️🤍💚

#i'm an underachiever — out.#i've got...busy social family things to do today and tomorrow #so i will probably not be online much but i am thinking of everyone

8 notes · View notes

ijustwanttoreadfanfiction · 1 year

Text

Friendly Sex - Chapter 4 - The Interrogation

This chapter is pretty dialogue heavy to cover some middle ground. Also my finger slipped and some smut copy and pasted itself onto the end, whoopsie.

On a serious note, there are discussions in this chapter regarding divorce, custody battles etc, and poor relationships with parents and their partners, which I know can be triggering for some people. I was raised solely by my mum who did an incredible job and have no contact with my dad, so it's been interesting to explore the dynamic between reader and her dad.

Chapter warnings: (MDI) 18+ only, phone sex, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, swearing, consensual use of the word slut.

************************************************************************

You awake groggy and disoriented, your alarm clock beeping incessantly, slapping the snooze button groaning at the bright sunlight streaming through the window, you burrow back down under the covers. Rolling onto your back you stretch out noticing a heaviness in your limbs not too dissimilar to a pulled muscle after running track, but it was the slight dull ache between your legs that made you smile.

There was something sinful in the way it made you feel, knowing what had caused it, knowing it was going to happen again, assuming Eddie hadn't woken up screaming in regret. And there was the enigma himself; Eddie Munson. On paper Eddie was not your type; metal head, underachiever, drug dealer, troublemaker, potentially needed a good wash, dressed like he'd fallen into the lost property box of an Iron Maiden concert…

Steve Harrington was your type; pretty boy, immaculately groomed, athletic, caring, funny, trendy.

But, even in your wildest fantasies about Steve you hadn't dreamt about half of the things you actually did with Eddie in the space of 2 hours. No, fantasy Steve was all about making deep and meaningful love to you on feather beds, not fucking you in the middle of the street, or eating you out in the back of a beat up van.

Fantasy Steve called you sweetheart in an adoring way, when Eddie called you sweetheart it went straight to your cunt.

Warmth blossoms in your belly, remembering the sensation of Eddie suckling at your clit, the way his cock stretched you as he rutted against you. With a deep sigh you put your hand down to your panty covered mound, only for your alarm to start beeping shrilly once again.

"Alright, alright I'm up." You say to no one in particular, turning off the alarm and heading into the bathroom.

"Oh sweet Jesus, no." You catch sight of yourself in the mirror and are horrified, pulling the neck of your sleep tee down for a better look. Hickey's . Hundreds, if not thousands, ok three. Three hickey's proudly adorning your neck and chest, the darkest and largest on the right side of your throat far above where any item of clothing could cover. Mentally cursing Eddie with every fibre of your being, you scramble about for your tube of concealer, you wouldn't ordinarily wear makeup to work but today was definitely going to be an exception.

***

Try as you might, and oh boy were you trying, you couldn't completely make the mark disappear but at least it looked more like a smudge of dirt now as opposed to 'look at me I got attacked by a vampire!' You were going to kill Eddie when you saw him, making another amendment to the pact in your head, no visible hickey's without prior approval .

Your work shirt mercifully covered the remaining two blotches he had sucked into the skin of your chest, and whilst your inner thighs and hip bones had also received the Eddie special, it was still early April and not quite warm enough for shorts season so you could wear pants without suspicion.

Concealing the mega-hickey had taken up most of your time, so it was in a flurry of movement you entered the kitchen, still tugging on socks, waistcoat half on, shucking open a pack of Pop Tarts with your teeth and ramming them in the toaster.

"Forget to set your alarm?" Your Dad asks pointedly, making you jump, he was sitting at the kitchen island sipping a cup of coffee and working on a crossword puzzle.

"Uh, I just lost track of time." You answer, hissing as you pull the hot pastries out.

"You seem to be doing that a lot." He says, giving you the same look as last night, like he was x-raying you.

You didn't trust yourself to respond so bit into the scalding Pop Tart instead with a pained shrug.

"Are you wearing makeup?" He asks suddenly, staring at you in confusion, you choke around your mouthful, zooming past him stopping only to plant a crumb covered kiss on his cheek.

"Gotta go Dad, bye!" You call thickly, racing out the door.

Wheeling your push bike out of the garage you cast a longing whine at your Dad's car, you had yet to pass your driving test, but even when you did your Dad had made it clear you would not be using his pride and joy a cherry red 1968 Chevrolet Chevelle, so for now you were stuck using your rusty but trusty pedal bike.

***

Family Video was only a 15 minute ride from your house but it felt like an hour, the tenderness between your legs making itself known from the minute you sat on the broken down seat.

"Fucking Munson." You wince with a groan, locking the bike outside the building.

Entering the currently empty store you wander over to the Westerns section thinking a Clint Eastwod night with your Dad might be a good way to stop him from taking too much of an interest in your personal life. You pull out the Dollars Trilogy, as a hand grabs your shoulder making you scream.

"Oh good you're not dead." Robin glared at you with a highly pissed expression.

"Jeez Robin you scared the shit out of me!" You complain holding your chest.

"Well now you know how I felt when you disappeared last night, where the hell were you?" She asks, hands on her hips.

You were cornered, it hadn't even occurred to you to come up with an explanation for your absence from the party and Robin was not the type of person to let something go without a fight, the two weeks you were away visiting your Mom last Summer had her translating Russian and exposing a secret KGB science experiment; so you didn’t have a hope in hells chance.

You hated yourself for doing it but a classic 'Steve pity party’ play was the best way to throw her off the scent, laying it on thick you let your shoulders slump sadly, sighing deeply.

"I'm sorry Rob, seeing Steve and Nancy it just kinda killed my buzz, you're right though I should have told you I was going home. I'm-"

"OH MY GOD, YOU GOT LAID!" She shrieks, grabbing your shoulders.

"What?! No I didn't!" You hiss, heart hammering wondering if your concealer had melted off, you were going to sue Cover Girl, ‘ all day wear’ my ass.

"Oh you so did!" She laughs loudly, positively vibrating with excitement.

"Robin, would you shut up !" You whisper frantically, Steve could be anywhere and you did not want him to hear.

You knew the only way to appease her would be to give her some form of the truth, whilst it would mean admitting you had sex, you could just say it was some random guy at the party, she didn't need to know it was Eddie. You shove the videos back onto the shelf, grabbing her hand, pulling her behind the curtain into the adult section, the irony not lost on you.

"Ok, yes, you're right I hooked up with someone but-"

"YES! I KNEW IT!"

"ROBIN!" You chastise, covering her mouth with your palm, which she answers with a lick much to your disgust.

"Ew, you're so gross." You complain, wiping your hand on her waistcoat, undeterred she launched her interrogation.

"Was he at the party? Does he go to our school? Do I know him? Is he hot? Was it good?" She asks you at a dizzying speed.

“Which one do you want me to answer first?” You query, desperate to keep her volume below foghorn.

“The most important one obviously, was it good?” Her grin is contagious, and you find yourself smiling in spite of your worry about being found out, once again your mind conjures up visions of Eddie, licking, biting, sucking, thrusting.

“Wow…” Robin breathes out staring at you with a slight jealousy.

“I didn’t say anything yet.” You laugh.

“You didn’t have to, the look on your face was enough.”

You both lapse into giggles, the teenager in you wanting nothing more than to gossip with your best friend.

“So, do I know him?” She asks again, eyes sparkling in curiosity.

“No, you don’t know him, he's just a random guy, friends with the older brother of some of the jocks who were there.” You were impressed with the lie, vague but with enough details to make it sound real.

"Wait, so if he’s older and doesn’t go to our school, is he a college guy?” She grabs your shoulders again. “Holy shit did you hook up with a college guy?"

"Who hooked up with a college guy?"

This time you both scream in fright, Steve pulling back the privacy curtain.

"Some girl."

"She did!"

You and Robin answer at the same time; your stomach drops, heart catapulting up into your mouth, you stare at her open mouthed in abject horror.

"You hooked up with a college guy?" Steve asks in surprise, an odd look on his face.

"Uh, yeah." You mumble, scuffing your sneakers against the linoleum, your face burning with embarrassment.

“Well, uh, hey good for you.” He says, the smile seeming forced. “We should probably open up.”

***

It was an abysmally slow Sunday shift, why Keith insisted on having all three of you in you would never know, there had only been one customer in the last 45 minutes and you were beginning to lose the will to live staring aimlessly out the window from behind the counter.

“Hey.” Steve came up with a boxful of tapes.

“Hi.” You reply leaning back against the countertop trying to act casual, but your heart was already racing, brain steadily filling with a kind of fluffy static, Robin referred to these episodes as ‘having the Harringtons’. “Are these returns for going back out?” You ask rooting about in the box.

“Yeah, I thought it might help kill some time.” He smiles, running a carefree hand through his god-like hair; your heart sputters and you think you might faint so you quickly distract yourself, pulling out five tapes at a time, checking they’ve been rewound.

“So, it sounds like you had a good time last night.” He says, coming around the counter to help you with the task, his proximity making your hands shake.

“Uh- yeah, it was fun.” You answer lamely, mind going blank as it so often did around Steve, putting a half rewound copy of Fast Times At Ridgemont High to one side

“Gotta say, I’m surprised, you’re so shy, didn't think you had it in you.” He didn’t say it like it was a bad thing, in fact he almost sounded impressed?

“Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do.” You reply with a small smile, leaning across him to grab some more tapes from his pile.

“Evidently not.” He laughs and you feel goosebumps erupt up your arms at the sound.

“So, you gonna see this guy again?” He asks, logging some data onto the computer system.

“Do you think I should see him again?” You don’t know why you ask him, the words tumbling out like vomit before you can stop them.

He turns to look at you fully and you’re trapped under the weight of his gaze, mouth going dry, he stretches a little and you catch a glimpse of his happy trail, you were definitely ‘having the Harringtons’ again.

“It’s not really up to me honey.” He answers kindly, Honey, sweet Jesus, he's trying to kill you. “Do you like him?”

The question threw you, you had spent so much of the day talking to Robin about the made up mystery man that you had almost disassociated Eddie from the entire situation, but now his face was all you could see.

“I haven’t really thought about it.” You say, while a little voice in your brain whispers 'Liar'

“Yeah I guess you only met him yesterday huh? Well so long as you’re having fun, that’s the main thing.” Steve smiles encouragingly, patting you on the shoulder.

"Yep, fun." You mumble with a nob, grabbing some more tapes.

***

5pm rolls around like a slug stuck in glue, the three of you desperate to get out of the store.

Shoving the Dollars trilogy into the basket of your bike, you set off with a wave, Robin calling after you as she clambers into Steve’s BMW.

“See you at school you hussy, I've not finished grilling you!”

“Bye!” You yell back with a laugh.

The ride home was refreshing after being cooped up all day, and you were pleased to note the soreness between your legs had all but disappeared, you whistle as you wheel your bike up the driveway looking forward to a quiet evening with your dad.

“I’m home and I've brought Mr Eastwood with me.” You call traipsing through the front door VHS’s in hand, toeing your sneakers off. “Dad?”

“In here Sprout.” Your Dad calls back from the den, you slouch in, flopping onto the couch next to him, leaning into his side. “Good day kiddo?”

“Slow, but looky looky, and I thought we could order pizza?” You say with a smile shaking the tapes at him, he smiles back taking A Fistful of Dollars but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” You ask warily, somehow already knowing what his answer would be.

“Your mom called.” And there it was. “She’d like you to go up for a weekend next month.” He says, focusing intensely on the back of the video description like he hadn’t seen the film 100 times before.

“Why?” You snap.

He sighs deeply, putting the tape onto the coffee table.

“Because she’s your mom, and she would like to see you.” He replies in a measured tone.

“But it’s not summer, the agreement was 2 weeks every summer break and every other Christmas.” You know you’re being needlessly difficult, petulant even but you feel the indignation rising.

“That was the minimum, she is well within her rights to see you as often as she wants to.” He reminds you carefully.

“I don’t care, she gave up her rights the minute she walked out on us!” You shout, standing from the couch, gazing furiously at your father. “You’ve already agreed haven’t you?” You ask accusingly.

His shoulders slump, running an exasperated hand over his careworn face.

“Yes Sprout I have.” He murmurs tiredly. “Your flight to Chicago is booked for Memorial Day weekend.”

“Unbelievable.” You huff, storming out of the room, stomping louder than necessary on the stairs.

“Hey, what about the pizza.” He calls after you.

“Eat it yourself, I'm not hungry!” You yell slamming your bedroom door, locking it for good measure.

You strip off your uniform, pulling on a worn flannel shirt and some sleep shorts all the while cursing under your breath, furious with your dad but even more so with your mom. Maybe you could beg Keith to give you extra shifts that weekend so you wouldn’t have to go, already knowing your dad would put a stop to it, likely calling Keith tomorrow to clue him in.

You slam the play button on your stereo, Fleetwood Mac’s - Storms filling the air from where you had last left off on the cassette, you were feeling guilty now, regretting taking your anger out on your dad, you’re just about to swallow your pride and apologise when your phone rings.

“Robin, I'm really not in the mood to discuss my sexual exploits any further tonight.” You say snapping into the receiver, plopping onto your bed.

"Uhh, hi." Came Eddie's confused voice. You feel your cheeks turn pink, cringing, having completely forgotten that he said he would call.

"Oh! Hi, sorry I thought you were -"

"Robin, yeah I gathered." He chuckles lightly. "Been gossiping about me sweetheart? I wondered why my ears had been burning all day.”

“What? No! Well sort of…” You ramble. “Robin somehow guessed I'd gotten laid, but I didn’t tell her it was you, just some random guy at the party.”

“Just some random guy huh? Was this random guy any good?” God you can practically hear the smirk.

You lean back against your headboard, placing the phone more comfortably in your lap so you could play with the cord.

“I’ve had better.” You say nonchalantly with a smile.

“Fucking liar.” Eddie laughs. “So you ok, you sounded pretty pissed when you answered?” He asks.

“Just family stuff.” You shrug, not wanting to go into it, but for the second time today you appeared to have word vomit. “It’s my mom, she wants me to visit next month.”

“And I take it that’s a problem?” He queries.

“You could say that. It’s complicated…” You trail off wondering if you should be going into all of this with Eddie, then you remembered Rule 3 - Communication. “She left when I was 10. She worked for a pharmaceutical company and met this heart surgeon, Phil.” You couldn’t keep the contempt out of your voice.

“Ah.” Eddie says in understanding. “And Phil is a massive dick right?”

You laugh, twirling the cord around your finger.

“The biggest.” You concede. “But he’s only part of the problem. It was a really messy divorce, my dad had a heart attack halfway through from the stress. When it came to custody of me I'd already made up my mind that I was staying with Dad, but my mom didn’t even fight for me; she was already pregnant and living a brand new life with her perfect surgeon. In the end it was settled. I got to live with dad permanently but have to stay with Mom for 2 weeks every summer and spend every other Christmas with her.” You heave a deep sigh, the sting of abandonment resurfacing.

“So, how come she wants to see you next month?” Eddie asks, and you’re honestly surprised that he paid attention to what you had been saying.

“No idea.” You mumble.

“My old man writes to me sometimes, asking me to visit him in prison, but I never go, I hate him for what he put my mom through.” He says, you knew from the high school gossip chain that Eddie’s dad was in prison and his mom passed away during his middle school years, so he lives with his uncle in Forest Hills Trailer Park. “Parents huh?” He adds with a wry snort.

You feel bad for bitching about having to see your mom when he probably would do anything to see his, you shift uncomfortably, biting your lip.

“Sorry Eds, I didn’t mean to dump on you.”

“Hey, it’s cool princess, everyone needs to let off steam once in a while.” He soothes. “Anyway, what are you wearing?” He asks, putting on a seedy voice.

“God, you’re such a pervert Munson.” You laugh.

“If I remember correctly, you were the one who came when I called you a slut last night.” He says teasingly and you feel your face flush with colour. “I gotta say baby, I've been thinking about your pussy all day.”

“Eddie.” You warn breathlessly, trying to ignore the spark of arousal in your belly.

“What are you doing right now?” He asks you, his tone lower than before.

“I’m in bed.” You say, fingers wrapping and unwrapping the telephone cord nervously.

“Touch yourself for me.” He says suddenly.

“Eddie I can’t, my dad is downstairs.” You hiss.

“You’ll just have to be quiet then, won’t you sweetheart.” His voice goes straight to your cunt.

Heart hammering, you get up checking your door is properly locked, creeping back your bed you lay down once more, hand resting on your stomach, receiver propped up to your ear by your pillows.

“I’ve never done this before.” You admit shyly.

“I’m guessing you never had sex in public before last night either, but there’s a first time for everytime.” He laughs. “We can stop though, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He adds seriously.

“No, I want to.” You mumble, allowing your fingers to drift downwards slipping under the waistband of your shorts and panties.

“Good girl.” He praises. “Are you touching yourself?”

“Uh huh.” You tease your slit softly, surprised at how wet you were already, fingertips coming

away warm and slick, moving back up to lightly circle your bud.

“Are you wet?” He asks, and you hear the chinking of a belt buckle on his end.

“Yes, i-i’m rubbing my clit.”

“Oh sweetheart.” He coos, his breathing picking up slightly. “I want you to pinch your nipples for me at the same time, can you do that for me princess?”

“Y-yes.” You whisper, your free hand unbuttoning your shirt to your naval, fingers pinching first at your left breast then right. “Feels good.”

“I bet it does.” Eddie groans softly. “What are you thinking about, baby?”

You bite back a low whine, hips rocking a little as you dip a finger back into your tight heat.

“You Ed’s, thinking about how you tongue fucked me.” You gasp, too turned to feel any kind of embarrassment.

“Mm, you tasted so good sweetheart, I can’t wait to get between your thighs again. Jesus baby, you’ve got me so hard.” He moans.

“I wish you were here Eddie, want you to fuck me.” You whimper, sliding a second finger into your cunt, your other hand rubbing more insistently at your swollen clit.

“Fuck-” He chokes out, and you can hear the slick pumping of his cock. “Me too princess, wanna fuck you so badly.”

“What would you do to me?” You ask barely above a whisper, hips canting up in earnest to meet your fingers.

“I’d fuck you from behind, on all fours, see that perfect ass bouncing back against my cock.” He groans. “You want me to take you from behind sweetheart?”

You bite back a sob, fresh arousal coating your fingers. “Please Eddie.”

“Such a good girl for me, maybe i’ll come visit you in work soon, fucking bend you over the counter.” He pants, a small whine escaping your throat. “Shit you like that?” He laughs incredulously. “Is that what you want baby, my little slut wanting to get fucked where anyone could see again?”

“Y-yes. Fuck Eddie i’m so close.” You cry softly, fingers strumming faster.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m going fuck your sweet cunt so hard tomorrow.” He sighs. “Gonna fuck you so deep you’ll feel my cock in your belly.”

“You will?” You ask, feeling your orgasm start to crest.

“It’s a fucking promise.” He growls.

“Fuck, fuck, Eddie i’m gonna cum.” You pant desperately, heat spreading from your toes in an unstoppable wave.

“Yes, cum for me sweetheart, I wanna hear you cum.” He pleads, your breath catches pleasure shooting up your spine, exhaling on a broken sob. “G-good girl, fuck i’m -” He cuts off, hearing him working his slick cock for all it’s worth, you whimper along with him teasing aftershocks from your throbbing cunt.

“Cum for me Eddie, please.” You beg, he groans loudly almost feral in your ear, both of you breathing heavily down the phone.

“You ok?” You ask after a few moments, still listening to him panting. “Eds?”

“Shit, sorry sweetheart, I think I blacked out for a second.” He wheezes and you burst into fits of giggles.

“That good huh?” You ask proudly, sitting up in bed.

“Incredible. You’re incredible” He says softly, you smile a different type of warmth blooming in your chest, before you can respond there’s a soft knock on your door making you jump.

“Sprout, you awake? Pizza’s here if you’re hungry.” He calls.

“Uh, yeah give me a minute Dad, I'm just on the phone to Robin.” You answer, quickly moving off the bed.

“Ok kiddo, tell Robin I said Hi.” He says, you wait until you can hear him on the stairs before talking again.

“Eddie, I gotta go.” You say.

“Pizza, yeah I heard.” He responds still sounding out of breath. “See you tomorrow princess, that’s a promise.”

Taglist: @avalon-wolf

#eddie x y/n #eddie x reader #eddie munson #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x reader #eddie x fem!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x afab reader #eddie munson x reader drabble #eddie munson x female character #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson 18+#friendly sex fic #stranger things

181 notes · View notes

cagedchoice · 1 year

Text

new year, new me, new tags part 1 \o/

GENERAL TAGS I'M AN UNDERACHIEVER — OUT. I AM ME…IT'S STILL ME — FACE. SO IT TELLS THEM WHO I AM — HEADCANON. ROUGH EDGES ARE THE ONLY THING I'M HANGING ONTO — MUSINGS/AESTHETICS. AT LEAST YOU HAVE SOME INTERESTING COMPANY — PROMO. WHO DO YOU THINK I AM? — SELF PROMO. THEY BUILT THE WORLD TO BE A GAME — MEME. YOU KNOW THE DRILL — REPLY. YOU GOT MY MESSAGE? — ANSWERED.

CHARACTER TAGS (GENERAL) WHATEVER YOU'RE INTO MUST BE PRETTY BAD — DOLORES. YOU EVER THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT? — MAEVE. I WON'T REST UNTIL EVERYTHING YOU BUILT IS DESTROYED — CHARLOTTE. YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF PERSON CAN'T BE BEAT? THE KIND THAT DOESN'T GIVE UP — FRANKIE.

DYNAMIC TAGS AM I THE BAD GUY? IS THAT WHY YOU PICKED ME? — DYN | DOLORES & CALEB. YOU'VE SAVED MY LIFE BEFORE…HAPPY TO RETURN THE FAVOR — DYN | MAEVE & CALEB. I HAVE SOMETHING THAT YOU DON'T HAVE — DYN | CHARLOTTE & CALEB. I WILL COME BACK TO YOU…I PROMISE — DYN | UWADE & CALEB. YOU'RE MY WARRIOR…I LOVE YOU — DYN | FRANKIE & CALEB. WE HAD TO HAVE OUR OWN PLAN…STICK TOGETHER — DYN | FRANCIS & CALEB.

CHARACTER TAGS (URL SPECIFIC) WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU DON'T COME BACK? — COPIESOFME (DOLORES.) WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE FOR US? — KILLJOYSANONYMOUS (MAEVE.) IF I STAY…WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? — KILLJOYSANONYMOUS (DOLORES.)

#tag dump.#I'M AN UNDERACHIEVER — OUT.#I AM ME…IT'S STILL ME — FACE.#SO IT TELLS THEM WHO I AM — HEADCANON.#ROUGH EDGES ARE THE ONLY THING I'M HANGING ONTO — MUSINGS/AESTHETICS.#AT LEAST YOU HAVE SOME INTERESTING COMPANY — PROMO.#WHO DO YOU THINK I AM? — SELF PROMO.#THEY BUILT THE WORLD TO BE A GAME — MEME.#YOU KNOW THE DRILL — REPLY.#YOU GOT MY MESSAGE? — ANSWERED.#WHATEVER YOU'RE INTO MUST BE PRETTY BAD — DOLORES.#YOU EVER THINK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT? — MAEVE.#I WON'T REST UNTIL EVERYTHING YOU BUILT IS DESTROYED — CHARLOTTE.#YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF PERSON CAN'T BE BEAT? THE KIND THAT DOESN'T GIVE UP — FRANKIE.#AM I THE BAD GUY? IS THAT WHY YOU PICKED ME? — DYN | DOLORES & CALEB.#YOU'VE SAVED MY LIFE BEFORE…HAPPY TO RETURN THE FAVOR — DYN | MAEVE & CALEB.#I HAVE SOMETHING THAT YOU DON'T HAVE — DYN | CHARLOTTE & CALEB.#I WILL COME BACK TO YOU…I PROMISE — DYN | UWADE & CALEB.#YOU'RE MY WARRIOR…I LOVE YOU — DYN | FRANKIE & CALEB.#WE HAD TO HAVE OUR OWN PLAN…STICK TOGETHER — DYN | FRANCIS & CALEB.#WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU DON'T COME BACK? — COPIESOFME (DOLORES.)#WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE FOR US? — KILLJOYSANONYMOUS (MAEVE.)#IF I STAY…WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? — KILLJOYSANONYMOUS (DOLORES.)

0 notes

apt502-if · 7 months

Note

I’m also super curious, would it be too much of a spoiler to ask which one is a ‘failure’ and which one is the ‘successful’? Like, the youngest is the ‘failure’ and the oldest is the ‘successful’?

I’m also curious to know their age difference to the mc and each other. Just having fun imagining family shenanigans and those little details would be cool to know, but I get wanting to keep the element of surprise.

The older sibling would be the failure. That sounds super harsh so I'll say underachiever. The successful, overachiever is the youngest sibling.

I'm still figuring out the age differences! :p I do want the younger sibling to be thirteen or around there. Older sibling should be well into late thirties. I'll figure it out. :pppp

#mail #about: mc's family

115 notes · View notes

mbti-notes · 3 months

Note

hi! im an entj and i wanted to know if you have any tips on how to be a better student whilst not thinking too much about grades or results. i feel like i place alot of emphasis on grades and results and i think it often hinders me at times. i often have trouble finding more ''meaning'' in my work and i'm not sure how to add more value into it other than achieving a good grade.

Your question is too vague because you haven't specified what level of schooling you're at and what your idea of a "better" student looks like. This "hinders you" how exactly? What is the exact nature or source of your discontent? What exactly are you aiming for? Without this context, it's hard to craft a response.

Did you know that professors in the US are witnessing a "literacy crisis" in their students that has never before been observed in the history of modern education? While there have always been unmotivated and underachieving students, nowadays, an alarming percentage of motivated students are barely able to handle more than ten pages of text at a time (the average assignment used to be 20-30 pages), nor are they able to analyze and comprehend the meaning, themes, or arguments being communicated in the text.

A literacy deficit poses a serious threat not just to the student's individual success, but also to the integrity of higher education and the functioning of society. Colleges have no choice but to "dumb down" their offerings over time. But more importantly, a successful democracy is difficult to sustain without intelligent and literate citizenry making sound judgments about complex social, political, and economic issues.

One obvious factor contributing to this problem is that many students have fallen behind due to the pandemic. Another obvious factor is the smartphone and the major role it has played in decimating people's attention spans. Extended focus and concentration are extremely important for learning, but endless internet scrolling trains the mind to expect rapid change and crave instant gratification. Yes, anyone who genuinely wants to be a good student should care deeply about the factors that hinder/inhibit their learning process. Increasingly, misuse of technology, such as smartphone addiction and excessive reliance on AI, is a major factor that prevents students from reaching their greater potential.

High school and college students are still in the early stages of ego development. Since their self-awareness hasn't had much time to develop, they don't tend to be aware of their own underlying motivations, for example, they will often just do something because it's just what everyone around them does. Additionally, heavy social media consumption at this stage of life leads them to believe that "success" is just for show or about obtaining likes/praise.

This brings us to the main factor to consider, which is that students are increasingly trained to be motivated by extrinsic rewards. For example, in the US, school funding is often tied to exam scores, so teachers have been forced to focus more and more on teaching only to exams, in order to secure funding. Higher education has also become much more competitive, which means excellent grades are essential for securing a seat in university.

While there is nothing wrong with extrinsic motivation per se, there is something wrong when a person is only motivated by extrinsic rewards, to the point where they are completely ignorant/neglectful of intrinsic rewards. The research strongly suggests: People who are more intrinsically (than extrinsically) motivated tend to be better learners because they assign their own value to learning and understand the inherent virtues of intellect, knowledge, and skill, apart from their real-world applications. The topic of intrinsic motivation comes up often, I suggest you read past posts.

Before you asked me for "tips", did you put in a reasonable effort to inquire into yourself and figure out why you overemphasize extrinsic rewards? Could you come up with the reasons/causes on your own, through self-reflection? It's difficult to find the right solution to a problem when you don't understand its origins. This is an important point because a common symptom of extreme extrinsic motivation is abnormally low self-awareness due to having little to no inner life. How's your inner life?

With regard to type development, people who are very extrinsically motivated tend to a) be too easily influenced by environmental factors, and b) lack introverted development. The answer to your question already lies within you, specifically, in the state of development of your introverted Ni and Fi functions:

1) Extrinsically motivated people tend to believe that their life lacks meaning because the world lacks meaning. What they don't realize is that meaning starts from within, so the actual problem is that they aren't able to generate enough meaning on their own.

Ni is a key function for constructing meaning, usually through patiently exploring context and connections to a bigger picture (of life as a whole and/or the world at large). As such, lack of Ni development commonly manifests as:

dislike of ambiguity (due to preferring clear categorical answers)

impatience for complexity (due to wanting easy answers)

superficiality (due to not going beyond the known/obvious)

lack of vision (due to overemphasis on rapid results)

Since you didn't provide any details about function development, I can't speak to how much you struggle with the above issues. The only thing I can say is that all of them are detrimental to learning. Clarify your aim: Do you want to be a good student in school or a good learner in life? Do you know the difference? It is the difference between lower order versus higher order learning, which I have already explained in previous posts.

A good student wants to know the final answer. A lifelong learner uses ambiguity as an opportunity to explore more nuanced truth.

A good student can handle some challenges but stops at the most difficult point. A lifelong learner takes the initiative to unravel complexity and eventually encounters profound wisdom.

A good student reads the book all the way through. A lifelong learner is intellectually curious, which leads them to discover new realms of knowledge far beyond the book.

A good student follows instructions and is reasonably competent as a result. A lifelong learner sees the greater potential of the field as a whole and gradually becomes an expert as they attempt to realize that potential.

If a certain activity or subject matter doesn't hold any meaning for you, is it because it's boring, or is it because you haven't really given it a proper look? This isn't to say that you have to be an expert on everything; it is only to say that you won't be able to truly appreciate something until you dig deeper into it and actively nurture appreciation for it. This brings us to the second point...

2) Extrinsically motivated TJs tend to believe that "utility" is the only measure of value. What they don't realize is that value is inherent to existence, so the actual problem is an inability to recognize value.

Fi is a key function for assigning value, usually through forming uniquely personal and intensely emotional attachments. As such, lack of Fi development often manifests as:

taking things for granted (due to not honoring their value)

dismissive attitude (due to lack of emotional attachments)

passionless existence (due to fear of emotional intensity)

Again, I can't speak to how much you struggle with the above issues. I can only inform you that they also tend to be quite detrimental to learning:

Human beings need to stay fed and sheltered in order to survive, but they also need activities that affirm their humanity and enrich their life. What happens to learning if your only concern is securing a comfortable material life?

Human beings learn best through feeling deeply moved and inspired by the best of what humanity has to offer. What happens to learning if you remove the human component of knowledge and only treat it as "data", just another object for your consumption and disposal?

Human beings discover themselves and express themselves through their varied interests, which is how every subject comes to have its fans, devotees, and experts. What happens to learning if you refuse to take an interest, downplay enthusiasm, and temper or repress passion?

If a certain activity or subject matter doesn't hold any value for you, is it because it is "worthless", or because you are blind to its value? This isn't to say that you must love everything; it is only to say that you won't be able to know yourself truly and feel energized about learning as long as you have a habit of dismissing every aspect of life that isn't immediately or practically "useful" to you.

Having intrinsic motivation basically means you generate your own personal reasons for learning. Nobody can force you to care or take an interest. Becoming an adult means you have to be the one to realize the virtues of going above and beyond whatever is required to ace exams. It may all sound very abstract, but this makes the difference in determining whether you will end up being just another cog in the machine of society or whether your life will always feel imbued with a greater sense of meaning.

#entj #auxiliary ni #inferior fi #learning #intrinsic motivation #passion #ask

26 notes · View notes

equalperson · 6 months

Text

i sort of hate the way some narcissists claim that "we're not really egotistical, we're just perfectionists 🥺 we have such high standards for ourselves!!"

this is definitely true for some people, but it's so monolithic. where's the acknowledgement for those of us who really are egotistical, entitled, irresponsible, and selfish?

the DSM-5 outright describes how narcissism may affect our self-direction by saying that we may have "personal standards [set] unreasonably high in order to see oneself as exceptional, or too low based on a sense of entitlement."

personally, i'm very much on the underachieving end of things. i feel too important to do housework, cook, or get a job.

i feel indignant whenever i'm expected to do any of these things and try my best to get out of them. ideally, i'd just spend my life mooching off of my family and getting paid for it because i'm special.

while it's fine to talk about your own experiences, i feel like when narcissists use the point of being overachievers to shut down sanist rhetoric, it just seems like they're trying to build on their preexisting ideas of who's "worthy," rather than acknowledging that we don't have to be painfully self-critical to deserve respect.

challenging sanism should include challenging the underlying ideas that back it up, not trying to make ourselves fit into those systems.

#narcissistic personality disorder #npd #actually narcissistic #actually npd #sanism mention

24 notes · View notes

whentheresmoonlight · 5 months

Text

Why Katsuki reads as queer coded.

Long before I shipped bkdk, Katsuki read as a queer character to me. Not meaning that Hori was assigning a sexual orientation to him but that he has qualities that parallel or make sense within the common narrative of the (western, I'm reading this through a western lens) queer experience. Here's why:

Disclaimer that this isn't to say that these traits make someone queer or that Katsuki is being intentionally written as queer, it's just reading Katsuki through a queer theory lens 👍

1. Perfectionism

Katsuki, if nothing else, is an incredibly hard worker. It's clear that in middle school, he worked to be at the top of his class. While he's a naturally intelligent and talented guy--as we see with his early skills in both sports and kanji in flashbacks--it's implied that he works for it. He doesn't have to work as hard as Izuku does, but it seems as though he works harder than, say, Todoroki does. I interpret this due to the way he berates his friends for underachieving in class. He knows that he's inherently smart, but he also knows that he achieves what he does via hard work, and so--as with Izuku in the flashbacks--he doesn't understand why his peers don't achieve the same.

Perfectionism is a classic queer-coded trait because it's a shield. If I'm otherwise perfect, no one can hate me for the thing that makes me different. It's a queer impulse to try and disguise "negative" traits with armor in the form of positive traits. You see this in people who are bullied becoming the class clown, for example, using comedy as their armor. If a queer person is afraid of not being loved for who they are, there's an impulse to be valued for what they can offer. This can manifest in overachieving and overcompensating so that they are never looked at with scrutiny, so that they can never be found out.

Katsuki makes himself scrupulous. He has an interest in maxing out every merit-based skill that he can so that he is no longer able to be scrutinized. He even takes advantage of popularity despite not liking people, as it's social capital and makes him more untouchable. He doesn't ever want anyone to look deeper than the skills that he offers. And when this strategy is interrupted, we see--

2. Anger

Anger comes from fear of vulnerability. In the context of the queer experience, this can easily be a reflex to keep people at a distance, as the perfectionism does, and a manifestation of repression. For Katsuki, it's both.

I don't think I need to put much explanation into how anger distances Katsuki from others. People's first impression is to fear him and then either avoid him or follow behind him. This collapses somewhat at UA, where people don't fear him, but it keeps him from forming bonds with people on any other basis than mutual respect. There's not a lot of intimacy like we see in, say, the early Todoroki + Iida + Izuku dynamics.

There's an argument to be made that Katsuki's explosive personality is a nature/nurture mix from his mother. That he's mirroring her behavior and that's basically it. No repression or fear involved. But we don't see enough of his parents/childhood to really spell that out. What we do get a good view of is his early desires from Izuku.

In those aforementioned flashback scenes, we see Katsuki not simply being confused when Izuku is unable to juggle a soccer ball, skip stones, or read kanji--Katsuki is upset by it. He's having strong feelings that he doesn't understand (not necessarily romantic! They're young!) and he covers them with anger. This continues through to middle school, when Katsuki is angry that Izuku is applying to UA, angry when they're paired against each other in the first partner exercise and Izuku has some success, when they're paired together for the final exam. These are BIG feelings and what for?

At first, Katsuki wanted Izuku to be on his same level, in the flashback scenes, and he was let down when Izuku wasn't. Then, after the river scene, Katsuki switches, and wants Izuku to be pushed down, to prove his own superiority in the face of Izuku's inherent goodness. This pairs his need to be perfect with an inability to face his admiration for Izuku. When he begins to see enviable qualities in Izuku, he represses those positive impressions. Whether or not you're reading bnha through a bkdk lens, there is repression here. Katsuki doesn't want to feel that there is something desirable about Izuku, that there's something he could be given by Izuku. That feels unsafe to his sense of self, and hence: anger. Anger, which is a trait also found in--

3. Masculinity

Masculinity is different culture to culture, and I'm not cultured enough to unpack the differences between western and JP representations of masculinity, so we're just gonna cast a wide net here.

Katsuki's parents are fashion designers, yet Katsuki pursues the absolute most violent career path that exists. And yes, this is because being a hero is the best (meaning very public to a young child with the trappings of fame and valor), and because his quirk is compatible with it, but that's not where the story ends.

All Might is Katsuki's role model. And yet, the persona Katsuki takes up is nothing like All Might's. As stated earlier, Katsuki is smart. He's smart enough to recognize that All Might is kind, friendly, generous, and likeable and that those are inextricable parts of his brand. And yet, Katsuki goes out of his way to instead be cold, mean, and unapproachable.

Again, wide net, but these are masculine traits. They keep a person closed off and inaccessible. They make it impossible to get close enough to really see a person. This is the same kind of shield that the perfectionism provides: armor against intimacy and scrutiny.

And, of course, the thing that a man can never be is weak. Weak is feminine. For a man, weakness is queer.

Katsuki's greatest fear seems to be being found out as weak. We begin to see him unpacking this, as he begins to admit to himself that Izuku is stronger than him, but, of course, we also see just how much work goes into him unpacking it. It only comes from honest self-reflection about himself, his bad defense mechanisms, and his relationship with Izuku. With introspection, he fears weakness less.

In conclusion

Queer theory is about heteronormativity and what it means when a person deviates from the norm into queerness. Katsuki's story in bnha is very much one of a character having many layers of armor to make him free from scrutiny, and slowly peeling those off to reveal his imperfections. This is the queer arc of a character being closeted, to a character coming out. Again, it's not to say that Katsuki is literally in the coming out process, it's to say that his narrative arc is a very queer arc, and it always felt that way to me. And, of course, as a bkdk, I see both those original closeting moments and the coming out moments as pretty much all being linked to fundamental interactions with Izuku.

Tbh, this theory is still a little half-baked. I don't know enough about queer theory, and I'm lacking a bit of cultural knowledge to give Katsuki the full breakdown. But before I had a single bnha ship, it was my impression that Katsuki was gay coded, and I've had these thoughts rattling around in my brain for over three years and I finally wanted to get them out (after a previous attempt that tumblr ate, rip). Maybe later on I'll do an analysis about who I think that Deku's experience is all about compulsory heterosexuality, hehe. Thanks for reading!

#this isn't anything too serious just something that always struck me #i'll be curious if anyone has anything to add!#meta analysis #bkdk #bakugou #headcanon #queer theory #fun fact: i used to talk about this on dating apps because i was so nuts over this. the guys were NOT interested hahaha #obviously some of these things are very common experiences and traits and i know that #but they nevertheless fit well in the common queer narrative

21 notes · View notes