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retrievablememories · 4 years

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dress it up | taeyong

title: dress it up pairing: taeyong x black!reader genre: fluff? request: “Hello I sent this request a couple weeks ago right when request followed I just wanted to resend since it’s open again ❤️: I was wondering if you could write with something with taeyong and a black oc. I really like taeyong’s sense of style and I feel like he’d be a great brand ambassador. I was thinking something about him and reader meeting at like a fashion show.” word count: 3.6k warnings: some cursing, a lil vulgar language, some alcohol use a/n: i don’t have a clue how the fashion industry works and got most of my research from a cosmopolitan article, but here’s my take on it 🤡 i struggled with how to approach the plot and feel like it might be a little dry? so i apologize if it’s lacking :/

“This year’s fashion show is going to be interesting, I think. I heard a few of those guys from NCT are coming.” Your friend Diana comes over to the couch where you’re sitting and tumbles over the back of it, landing halfway in your lap. You shout as she does, narrowly avoiding spilling your bowl of cereal.

“NCT? Which ones?” You try to crowd closer to her phone to see if it has the answers; she’s been unable to come away from it for the last half-hour. She twists away from you so you won’t be able to see the screen, but it’s a little too late for that. “Ugh, don’t tell me you’re texting that idiot again. I thought you said you were done with him.”

“Don’t worry about that.” She chuckles nervously. “Anyway, it’s not 100% confirmed yet, but some of the reports have mentioned there’s gonna be Taeyong...ain’t he the leader or something like that?”

“I’m sure. Didn’t you know? I think he might be the same one who’s been on Melanie’s radar for a bit...”

“Melanie?” Diana’s head springs up from the couch cushion.

You nudge her and laugh. “Don’t look so shocked, she makes good choices sometimes.”

The other girl shakes her head. “Huh. I highly doubt it. The last few models she scouted were major divas and you know this. Who is going to sit all day and pick all the M&Ms out of trail mix? I don’t get paid enough for this bullshit.”

“Either way, keep looking. Whether you hate her choices or not, we’re still gonna need some fresh faces for this new ad campaign.”

Diana sighs and waves her hand. “I got it.”

“You should probably make sure you find more prospects this time, too. Jasmine was tryna throw shade last time because she had, like, 2 more than you.”

“Oh girl, fuck that. No one cares if you have more prospects if they’re all a bunch of Insta influencers and bored rich kids who bought their way onto the runway.”

You both laugh out loud at that, though Diana’s quickly distracted again when she gets a message.

“Don’t think I’m gonna forget about you and your man troubles, either. You need to leave that clown alone,” you say, pushing her off as you get up to go to the kitchen.

“Whatever! Just let me have my fun, it ain’t nothing serious.”

The day of the show is hectic, though that’s expected. There’s always someone—or a group of someones—running around like a chicken with their head cut off with how much work there is to do, getting people in their right seats and making sure the models are dressed properly.

You, Melanie, and Diana try to stick together for the most part, though Melanie quickly makes Diana weary with her nonstop talking. Jasmine is nowhere to be found, but you know she’s there somewhere. She got the same invite the rest of you did.

“Liza is gonna be pissed if Jasmine doesn’t show up,” Melanie comments. “Can’t get a good story with no editors on the job.”

“Are you not an editor anymore, then?” Diana says, unamused. “We’re here, too. We don’t need that girl to do our own jobs.”

Melanie sighs. “Well, I’m just saying...”

“Calm down,” you tell Diana. “We’ll do fine either way. See, this is what happens when you don’t listen to me; you’ve let this bum dude get you all wound up.”

She rolls her eyes. “Don’t start that here, let’s just find our seats.”

The three of you sit a little further back in the crowd with the rest of the editors, bloggers, and whoever else has come to get the scoop. The more famous people—aka, the celebrities and fashion designers—sit near the front for all to see. It’s like watching a bunch of pretty, puffed-up peacocks strut around and mingle together. Some of them clearly want to be noticed even more than the models, though all the attention they get isn’t the favorable kind.

Melanie makes an excited noise next to you, and Diana looks to see what’s reacting to, then perks up herself. “Look, there they are.” Diana nearly has to shout in your ear over the noise, nodding her head in a direction several feet away from your group. Just as she’s said, there is Taeyong, Jaehyun, Mark, and Yuta walking to their seats.

“Yep, that’s them,” you reply. “Are you gonna go talk to them after the show?”

“Me!? That might be better suited for you guys,” Diana says, looking at you and Melanie nervously. You laugh at her sudden change in demeanor.

“Come on. What’s wrong? They’re just men, and we’ve worked with plenty of attractive clients before.”

“I know, but…” Diana trails off, a skeptical expression written all over her face. “They’re just, uh, way prettier than I expected them to be. It’s a bit shocking.” You snort at that.

“You can’t be serious.”

Melanie rolls her eyes at the indecisiveness. “I will gladly do it if neither of you will.”

“I never said I wouldn’t,” you interject. “Just let me and Melanie handle the kpop idols and you can talk to the Instagram influencers who work your nerves so much.” You laugh, and Diana sighs, crossing her legs.

“Sure, sure.” As you all wait for the show to start, Diana sits up again. “Oh, there’s the bitch.”

You and Melanie both look. She must obviously be referring to Jasmine, who’s sitting with another group of fashion editors nearby and apparently having the time of her life. “As long as she don’t come back around here, I don’t care…” you say, sitting back in your seat.

“Nah, but let me find out she’s kissing a rival company’s ass. That sounds like information the boss could use, if you know what I mean.”

You laugh at that. “Girl. Not this snitching shit.”

“More mess.” Melanie shakes her head.

The show starts soon after, with the surrounding lights dimming a bit and the main spotlights illuminating the runway. There are a few speakers who introduce the show’s concept before the models come out, and then the music begins, loud enough to make your eardrums rattle.

The fashion show itself seems to go on forever, all the models and their outfits blending into one colorful mass of fabric and glitter. You still take notes the whole time, though, as you’ve been taught to do since you took the job. Even if you’re bored with the celebrities, the music, or the show itself, you still have to bring something good back home.

Possibly the most important of the show, there’s always time after it ends—and before the after party begins—for everyone to mingle and network. This is primetime for the editors and bloggers, who do their best to make as many connections and unforgettable first impressions as possible. Even if you don’t get an interview or deal that day, it’s always possible to make yourself memorable enough that they’ll reach out to you later.

You don’t plan on going home empty-handed today, though.

Making your way to the NCT members is not particularly easy, though you didn’t quite expect it to be. Many others are also determined on getting next to them, whether it’s to admire their looks, try their luck, or make an actual business proposition.

Finally, you and Melanie worm your way to the front of the crowd after some other editors have left. You quickly discover that, despite your earlier teasing, your friend was right; they really are much prettier up-close and in-person.

Taeyong, especially, is hard to look away from. Making eye contact with him makes you feel a bit flustered, which you aren’t quite expecting. You quickly get used to seeing celebrities in this line of work, which diminishes the starstruck factor after a while.

He’s the only member not currently talking to someone else, and you snatch that chance before someone else can jump in; you can already see another editor from one of your rival companies making a beeline for him.

“Um, hi! I’m Y/N and this is my coworker Melanie...we’re with InStyle Magazine. It’s great to see you here.”

Taeyong smiles at you warmly and shakes both of your hands. His hand is soft in yours, and his rings are cool against your skin. “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Taeyong.”

“Did you enjoy the show today?” you ask. Another thing you’ve learned is that it’s better to make some kind of human connection with someone before asking them for any kind of favor. Unfortunately, not every editor follows that advice.

“Yes, it was amazing. Really exciting.” He raises his eyebrows. “Did you enjoy it, too?”

“Oh of course, it was great! So much fun, thank you for asking.” Melanie nods along to your words. “You’re pretty fashionable yourself,” you say to him, gesturing to his outfit. “But I’m sure you already know that; we’ve seen quite a few of your best looks.”

Taeyong shrugs as if he’s bashful about it, though his bright smile tells another story. “It’s a way to express myself...I mean, besides music, so it’s nice to go all-out.”

You smile. “It’s a great gift to be able to express yourself however you like. What would you think about exploring that with us at Instyle? I think it’d be a great opportunity to get to know you and your groupmates better, especially with how fashion-forward you all are. Is that something that would interest you?”

“I’m interested, and I’m sure the others would be into it, too. Maybe our managers can work something out?” Taeyong turns to the manager standing beside him and says something in Korean, and the manager appears to think something over for a moment before nodding.

Melanie jumps into the conversation next. “We also have connects with pretty popular brands right now, like Vetements. We can’t guarantee any deals outright, but it never hurts to get in touch. They’ve been looking for some new faces lately, and honestly, you’re a perfect fit in my eyes.” Melanie places her hands over her heart at the last sentence, and you giggle a little. She always knows how to pour the compliments on thick.

Taeyong’s smile is modest as he says, “Thank you.”

You end up swapping contact info—your boss’s number for their manager’s digits—so something can be arranged, and you text Liza immediately to let her know what’s up.

“Again, thank you so much for sparing your time today, you’re so kind,” Melanie gushes. You can practically see the stars sparkling in her eyes through her round glasses as she shakes Taeyong’s hand again, holding his with both of hers. You try not to laugh at this. Despite her history of less-than-stellar picks, she’s not usually one to let the inner fangirl slip, but now even her composure is being tested.

Still, your own insides get a bit mushy when he turns to you again and takes your hand. “Yes, thank you. We really appreciate it.”

“It’s a pleasure.” Taeyong’s eyes seem to linger on yours a little longer than necessary. Or maybe the pounding music has finally rattled your brain loose. Either way, you enjoy the moment for what it is before bidding your goodbyes and walking back through the crowd with Melanie.

You throw your arm around her shoulders, and she leans into you like she’s going to faint. “God. Was that real?!”

“If it wasn’t, please don’t pinch me yet.”

“We’ve already gotten the best of the best, so if you ask me, we deserve a damn drink right now.” Melanie pretends to throw a shot back and you laugh.

“Girl, not so fast. We still have to try to recruit a few more if that deal doesn’t work out. Liza won’t let us hear the end of it otherwise.” You sigh, not feeling very enthusiastic about it either, but decide to steel yourself for a long evening ahead.

The after party that night is packed with people; many are the same ones from the fashion show earlier, though there are also new faces. Diana rejoined you while you were both getting ready at the hotel and managed to wring all the details out of Melanie about your meetup with the group. Even now while sitting in the lounge, she still goes on about it.

“I still can’t believe this shit is really happening.”

“If the boss wants it to happen, then it’s likely gonna happen,” Melanie says.

Diana leans back against her lounge seat, nursing her drink and smiling to herself. “Jasmine is gonna drop dead when she hears about it...hopefully for real.”

You roll your eyes. “Stop worrying about what that girl is doing and just enjoy the party. We didn’t get all dressed up like this to let it go to waste.”

Diana throws her arm across the back of the lounge chair as she scans you up and down. “Yes, let’s talk about you and this little black dress, actually. Whose attention are you looking for tonight, miss girl?”

“Here you go. I just wanted to look nice, I’m not searching for any—”

“Hey, isn’t that Taeyong and Mark?” Melanie points to one of the room’s many entryways, and you and Diana sit up straighter to look. “Diana, don’t be so obvious, you’re practically breaking your neck!”

It definitely is them. You don’t know where the others are, but maybe they decided to split up and go to another one of the after parties in town. You suddenly feel nervous again, though you try to ignore it.

“Oh, they didn’t bring Jaehyun.” Melanie slumps in her seat, and you give her a skeptical look.

“I thought you liked Taeyong!? You were the one giving him goo-goo baby eyes back there.”

“Yeah, but Jaehyun is my favorite. It doesn’t hurt to make a good first impression. Maybe Taeyong will let my future husband know about me and we can finally get married.” You can only shake your head.

Diana looks back at you slyly. “Ah, I see. Is this who you’re looking to impress?”

You scoff. “You say that like I knew they’d be coming here.”

“Hmm, maybe? You never know.”

At one point, Taeyong catches sight of your little group and waves, and you all wave back. You don’t expect him to come over with Mark in tow, though, which makes you sweat a little.

“It’s you again,” Taeyong says, his smile wide, and his eyes flit across your body before coming back to your eyes. “You look nice.”

You’re a little embarrassed at the compliment, and you have to ignore the other two girls giggling like schoolgirls to avoid getting even more nervous. “Ah, thanks, you look nice too…”

Mark introduces himself next, and the other two fawn over how cute and handsome he is. It isn’t long before there’s someone else vying for their attention again, and they leave with an apology; but that is far from being the last time you see them that night.

Though both men weave in and out of the crowd, interacting with numerous people throughout the night, Taeyong seems to continually find his way back to you and your friends—or just you, if the other two are gone somewhere else. He even gets you to dance with him a bit. You enjoy his company, even if he does make you a little nervous. If there’s anything you could compare him to, you might think he’s like the sun itself, with everyone else in the room pulled into his orbit—but willingly.

“Don’t let this one slip,” Diana says in your ear after Taeyong’s pulled away yet again to talk to someone else. You jump from hearing her next to you, still expecting her to be across the room talking with some lifestyle blogger.

“Let...slip? We already told you we talked to him about the magazine—”

“Not that shit. It looks like he’s taken a liking to you. I wouldn’t let that pass me by, if I were you.”

“Put the wine down,” you say, reaching for her glass, but she only sidesteps you.

“Accept a damn compliment! You talk about me and my men issues, but you need to allow yourself to be complimented and cared for, for once.”

“Stop. Somebody can probably hear us, and I don’t even know the man like that.”

“You stop. He’s been buzzing around you all night. Honestly, I don’t know if he just wants pussy or an American romance but girl, I’d say yes.”

“Okay yeah, you’ve had enough.” You try to pluck the glass away again, but she twirls away from you and almost spills her drink in the process. You laugh as some people nearby give you both odd looks. “You were too afraid to even go and talk to them. Me and Melanie did all the work, and now you’re claiming you’d say yes...give me a break!”

“Alright, hold it against me forever if you please. Just don’t mess this up, okay?”

You shake your head. “Fine, if it’ll make you leave me alone.”

The party isn’t even close to winding down yet, but you figure it’s time to get Diana back to the hotel before she has one too many. And Melanie’s started complaining about her feet hurting, which always means she’s officially ready to leave.

There’s a veranda attached to the building where the party is being held, and you go out onto it to get some air after being crammed in with the others for so long. You only intend to stay a few minutes, waiting for Melanie to find Diana so you can leave.

You hear someone else walk onto the veranda, and you don’t initially think much of it. There are already a few people out here lounging on the steps and smoking, so you figure someone else must’ve come for a break too. You’re a little startled, though, when the person leans against the railing near you, and you turn to see its Taeyong.

“Tonight’s been fun,” he says, looking towards you casually. The night breeze rustles his hair a bit, and you know for certain your boss is going to be really pleased with this pick. He’s natural-born model material.

You hum in agreement. “It’s definitely been a long night,” you say, concealing a yawn. “I don’t think I’ve ever had such an exciting time at an after party, though. ”

He grins. “Really? Never?”

You shrug a little. “As much as they dress it up on the outside, not every party is very entertaining. Some of them can be...something else entirely.” You chuckle at some of the ridiculous memories you have.

“Well, I’m glad you had a good time tonight...and that we got to talk some more.” Taeyong’s eyes look remarkably genuine as he says this, and it turns your stomach all weird and fluttery. Maybe you should listen to Diana for once.

Then again, maybe you shouldn’t be fraternizing with someone who’ll likely be working with your company soon?

“I wouldn’t mind seeing you again, either. Outside of business.” He tugs at his lip very slightly with his teeth after he says this. Which might seem like a nonchalant move in any other setting, but here and now, with this mischievousness glittering in his eyes, it’s anything but.

Oh, fuck it.

“Hm. I’ll take you up on that, then.” You find a slip of paper in your purse and write your number down on it, giving it to him afterwards. When you momentarily glance back at the entrance to the building, you catch your friends watching sneakily from afar, flashing you thumbs-ups and grinning wildly. “Enjoy the rest of your night, Taeyong.” You smile.

“I will.” There’s a promise in his voice.

Your friends are all over you as soon as you get back to them, linking their arms with yours and crowding in to hear whatever tea you have.

“You guys, really? We were only out there for a few minutes.”

“It only takes 7 seconds to fall in love,” Melanie chimes in, and Diana laughs out loud.

“If you wanna hear it that bad, Diana’s gonna have to get sober first. I don’t need you posting my business all over Twitter tonight.” The other girl sighs and only tugs you and Melanie along faster so you can all meet up with your Uber driver.

“Fine, girl, but you’re gonna let me pick all your future baby names, okay?”

“Sure, sure.”

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canonicallysoulmates · 4 years

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Last week Jensen was on Rosenbaum’s podcast, this week it’s Jared’s turn. Just like with Jensen’s I recommend checking Jared’s out it is for free on youtube, I will be linking to it at the end of this post, and I also recommend checking out his first appearance on Rosenbaum’s podcast.

While Jensen’s appearance was recorded in the beginnings of the boys Vancouver quarantine, Jared’s was recorded a little more recently after the boys had resumed production and when they were starting on the final episode nonetheless if you are looking for information regarding Supernatural and/or the final epis you will not find them here, Jared actually didn’t talk much about the show. He did however open up about some topics including his arrest.

Of course, they are two different people whose interviews were done at different moments in time and who got asked different questions but this had a very different feel from Jensen’s; while Jensen’s felt more interview like, this felt very much like a conversation between two friends who’ve known each other for years....the majority of the time.

Here’s the thing, and some of y’all are not gonna like me for this....while the conversation had its deep moments and Jared opened up about some personal stuff it felt to me like a more open version of how he is in conventions. Which is not a bad thing! But it’s not like last time where he was, imo, a version of himself that only those in his circle might get to hear. There was some fuckery people, okay? There was some fuckery and we will be talking about it.

I am going to put a disclaimer here, just in case, that this post is not going to be G*nevieve friendly. Or friendly towards her and Jared’s “marriage”.

Before we get into what Jared said and talked about, I do want to take a minute to acknowledge and say condolences to Rosenbaum and his family, one of his sisters recently passed away after being sick pretty much her whole life.

I also wanna say real quickly that something that I really like, and I would say even respect, about Rosenbaum is how open he is about things and listening to the intro of this “episode” made me realize why it is that he gets his guests to open up so often; I think it’s because he himself is open about his struggles and his issues and he is free of judgement so if you confess to something stupid he’s not gonna judge you for it, he’s also willing to cut things out if his guests ask him too so his guests know they can talk to him and he will understand and not judge them and will respect their privacy and cut something out if they ask it of him so they can talk freely.

Okay, after all that let’s get into what Jared said and talked about in the podcast. FYI, much like in the Jensen post, from here forth Rosenbaum will be referred to as MR for convenience.

- The conversation starts on what I considered to be a funny note with Jared talking about his infrared sauna blanket which he travels with that is such a weird item to travel with I can’t with the white richness of it all but hey we all got our quirks 😂

- After that the conversation turns pretty serious and deep, he talked about Sadie and having to make the decision to put her to sleep. He was tearing up talking about it, and I’m not gonna lie I myself was crying - hell I’m tearing up as I’m writing this not just because I can’t handle seeing this man cry but because I know what he’s talking about, I know that pain, I know what he meant by Sadie looking at him like it was time for her to go, I know what it’s like to be in that room with a beloved pet as they’re taking their last breath...I have had to put two of my cats to sleep in the past and it’s the most difficult and heartbreaking decision one sometimes has to make as a pet owner. 😔

- Something I like about when MR and Jared talk to each other is that they have very similar personalities in some ways and they’re good friends so when they’re talking it very quickly turns into two friends talking to one another which means the conversation is all over the place. In a good way. They got into a conversation about living in the moment and how social media and cell phones can affect that; I, personally, found it fascinating. I love hearing them discuss their different POV’s about these types of topics.

- And here’s where we get to the fake. I’m writing this post at an extremely late hour but I’m determined to get it up before I go to bed and I really wanna go to bed, so I’m gonna try to get through this as fast as possible so strap in cause there’s a lot of bullshit to quickly wade through in this section.

Jared starts praising the fuck out of G like this man was going for it, he was really pilling it on nice and thick. So, there I am watching this with my eyes about to roll right out of my skull wondering what was up with all the fuckery cause there’s being civil and a gentleman and then there was this when a light bulb goes off above my head 💡: When this was filmed, he already knew she had been cast to play his wife on Walker, he probably figured out that by the time this aired either the news would have already been out or would be announced soon so he’s hyping her up in the only way he knows how which works anyways cause the character she’s playing is his wife and her likability is in part going to rely on people overlooking her bad acting and the nepotism to focus on her being married to Jared in real life cause people love when irl couples work together even more when they’re playing a couple. From what I’ve seen it makes people less likely to call out a lack of chemistry cause then they feel like they’re insulting the couple.

He hypes her up using the same script he and Jensen have used in the convention circuit for years when it comes to praising the wives complete with classics such as ‘i’m never home so i never knew she did so much’ and ‘i ask her what i can do and she tells me to take out the garbage’. Nothing new is added to the script, he doesn’t go into details about what makes her amazing or about “all she does” he just pretty much says over and over that she’s incredible and does so much, if he meant it and she really does “so much” why not go into detail? It’d be so easy of him to say something like ‘oh, she’s always making us healthy meals and trying out new recipes’ which can be backed up by her insta because during quarantine she did a bunch of insta stories about cooking and checking out recipe books like goddamn Jared if you’re gonna lay it thick at least put in the effort even I could hype her up better and I don’t even like her.

It all comes off as very insincere, have y’all ever seen somebody talk about the person they love? You can tell in their voice, in their eyes, some even get a fond little smile. It’s actually quite cute to watch but there’s none of that here, even when he mentions G giving birth there’s no emotion there’s no sincerity, it’s like he’s saying all the right things but he doesn’t believe them. It reminds me off- have you ever had someone, maybe it’s a friend or a romantic partner or whatever just someone who you’re introducing to somebody else or a group of people and you really need them to like this person you’re introducing so you start to sell them meaning you just start singing their praises to an over the top extend as if you were a car dealer trying to boost up their merch? Yeah, it’s like that.

I don’t believe for one second that she volunteered to go with him to Van so he wouldn’t be alone like Jared go to somebody else with that story 🙄

I did have to laugh at some parts cause he was laying it on thick as if I didn’t remember and know that he looked miserable in almost all the pics G posted of him from quarantine right from the beginning, and being all ‘she doesn’t have any time for herself’ well clearly she found some time cause she does her little yoga collabs, she’s had her little photo shoots, she’s done a bunch of sponsored ads, she did her clothing collab with Kohl’s, she started a book club clearly she has the fucking time to do things for herself and pursue hobbies. He also said with three kids he didn’t have time for himself which I found funny because I don’t know if y’all remember this but early on in the quarantine Jared and G did a livestream and in it he mentioned several times that he was using his time for phone calls and even way too seriously said he was handling cabin fever by hiding and letting G handle the kids so....

It’s also an interesting contrast between what Jensen said in his podcast appearance because while Jared tried to make it sound as if G had no time for herself and like that’d be impossible with three kids, Jensen pretty much said the opposite, he said that he and D would sometimes take the kids and entertain them so the other one could have some space to do their own thing, and even gave an example of settling the kids with a movie so the parents can have their own space at the same time.

- Moving on from that fuckery, the rest of the conversation was very deep and interesting. He talked about going to therapy and once again mentions being afraid of fucking up his kids, but adds that he’s come to realize that no matter what he does he’s gonna fuck up his kids anyways cause that’s what every parent does even if they’re amazing. This is a statement that I very much agree with it doesn’t matter how amazing a parent is they’re gonna make mistakes and fuck you up.

He talked about his anxiety and his depression and how he doesn’t like to say he suffers from it because it makes him sound like a victim he prefers to say he deals with anxiety.

This is gonna sound so weird but I loved something Jared said about death, MR talked about his anxiety and he said that his psychologist told him anxiety is always in the backseat and a. that is so true I think pretty much anybody who suffers from anxiety can tell you that it’s always there but b. Jared mentioned that he head somebody talk about death the same way, that death is always in the passenger seat but they become a friend. I know for some this might sound concerning or macabre but personally I think this is the best way to think about death not as something to hate but as a friend who is always besides you and that doesn’t mean you’re in any rush to welcome its embrace but it does mean you don’t fear it.

He said that now a days if he wakes up and doesn’t feel anxiety he’s like ‘what’s wrong?’ which honestly relatable af

And I am paraphrasing btw, this is the cliffnotes version of a very deep in-depth part of the conversation between him and MR starting when they’re talking about therapy the whole thing is very interesting I’m not doing it justice.

- Towards the end of the podcast Jared opened up about his arrest. He said he has no real recollection of what happened, he doesn’t know if maybe he was drugged or just got black out drunk but he doesn’t remember the fight he just remembers up to the point of going to his friends bar. He has seen the security tapes of that night, saying he didn’t recognize himself due to the way he was acting. He thinks perhaps because he has been jumped before that maybe he acted on instinct to fight back. It is not something he is proud of and he doesn’t make excuses, he knows he fucked up. He also says he has not drank since then.

I am very proud of him for opening up about this, and for either quitting or limiting his alcohol consumption - quite honestly I’m not sure if he has full on stopped drinking or if he is just limiting himself to only once in a blue moon cause I do know people, hell I am one of these people, I don’t drink 99% of the time but if it’s a special occasion or I’m just chilling with someone I know and they’re having a drink I might have one or a sip or two so technically I don’t drink so I don’t know if maybe that’s what he’s decided to do or if he’s quit alcohol forever, either way I’m very proud of him. I’m proud of him for opening up about this and for talking about his mental health and therapy.

With the exception of some fuckery he really did open up about some things and I highly recommend giving it a listen/watch because when it’s the real him talking it’s a very insightful conversation.

Inside of you | Jared Padalecki

#anti genevieve #not even sure what to tag this as and frankly #i am exhausted #so proper tagging will have to wait for my brain cells to come back #also yes i am aware it is wednesday shush just pretend it's tuesday cause i worked too hard on this to wait till thursday to post it okay?#when i come back after hopefully sleeping more than an hour we'll start our regular wednesday programming #mine #annianvi

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darlinvandijk · 4 years

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Always been you

Concept: request where “Can you do an imagine where y/n and ruel are older and she decides she wants to go to college in LA ; they try the long distance relationship but it doesn’t work out bc she’s too busy with her studies meanwhile he becomes more popular and travels more often, but after 4 years she goes to one of his concerts and they reunite?”. Shoutout to my friend for giving me an idea to start this! Dm me and whatnot for a request!(really fucking long btw) Hope you enjoy :)

I sit by my phone frowning as I watch the FaceTime screen ring for a bit, before showing me that the call wasn’t answered. Looks like Ruel is busy, yet again. It’s not that I’m mad at him for not picking up, he has a job to do that takes up countless hours of his time, and I’m proud of the dedication he has when it comes to his career. I’m just upset that lately it seems like we never talk, he calls when I’m asleep or working, or I call when he’s asleep or working. It just seems like nothing is working for us, but I can’t not be with him, he’s my whole world. I finally clear my thoughts and stand up from my bed, making my way to my bathroom so I can have a relaxing shower, and hopefully come out to see a message from Ruel.

I make my way out of the bathroom in my favorite hoodie that I took from Ruel, jumping onto my bed to check my phone notifs, feeling my heart flutter at the text from “bubs <3”. I immediately click it, typing down a response as fast as I can, hoping he’s not busy or asleep yet. Luck is finally on my side when I get a response, mere seconds after I had sent mine.

Baby I’m so sorry, I would’ve answered but I was on stage

It’s okay bubs, how was the concert? I know how much you love Amsterdam :)

It was amazing! They were so into everything and I swear they knew lyrics to unreleased songs which was kinda wild.. wish u were here tho

I’m happy for you baby!! You know how your fans are, they find everything out lmao

Are you okay? You kinda ignored the last thing I said

I’m okay, sorry I just didn’t want to reply to it and get all emotional on you lol

I let out a shaky breath when I hit send, already feeling my built up emotions get ready to spill over, I just miss him so much. I see him typing for a couple of seconds, before the little bubble disappears, instantly replaced by my screen lighting up with an incoming FaceTime call. I hesitantly answer, making sure the hood on Ruels hoodie is covering my face a little, knowing it’s already getting splotchy from being so emotional. I watch as the screen lights up, with my beautiful boyfriend laying on his bed in the back of the bus, staring at me silently.

“Hey love, wanna remove that hood for me? I want to see that beautiful face of yours-” he quietly whispers out, not wanting to overwhelm me. He can read me like a book, which is how he can always tell when something’s wrong. I let out a quiet sigh, pulling the hood back, looking away from the phone so that I don’t have to see the look on his face. I hear him sigh out once he takes in my under eye bags, splotchy red face, and shiny eyes. He takes in a deep breath before asking the question he didn’t want to ask, “is this because of me?” He whispers out, his voice breaking with emotion. I stare at him with wide eyes, shocked by the question, and also unsure on how to reply to it.

“No! You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m just a little touchy today.” I instantly blurt out, not wanting him to feel bad, because I already know he’s thinking about all the missed calls we’ve had. More than we could count just this week. He watches me, giving me an unconvinced look, running a hand roughly through his hair. We’re both silent for a little bit, trying to figure out what was so different about this phone call compared to others, because this tension floating through the air has never happened before, I’m more unnerved than I’ve ever been with him.

“I know that’s not true. I know it’s getting to you, all the missed calls and late replies. It’s getting to me too. I just don’t know how to fix it baby, but trust me when I say I’m trying to.” He whimpers out, causing my eyes to water even more at his obvious distress. I send him a watery smile and place a kiss to my promise ring, watching as he sends me a small smile while placing a kiss to the necklace he wears for me. It’s a silver pendant with my first initial, he got it the same time he gave me this ring, which was over a year ago on our second anniversary together.

“I love you, even if things have been a little difficult lately. School has just been taking up so much of my time lately and it’s hard to find times to talk when you’re in a whole other country. It’s not your fault and it’s not mine, life just has a crazy way of handling things I guess” I mumble out, watching him nod his head, reaching a hand up to wipe his eyes of the unwanted tears. I wipe my eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie, only to look back at the screen, seeing him with a completely shattered expression. I freeze and practically stop breathing, scared of what he was about to say to me. A choked sob escapes him, tears making their way down his face as he holds onto the pendant dangling in front of his chest.

“You know I love you, right? You’re my whole world, my soulmate, my everything. I wouldn’t do anything if I didn’t think it’d benefit you.” He chokes out, his eyes blurry with tears as I stare at him with my own tears pouring down my face. I’m instantly filled with fear when I see the way he’s acting, because he’s never like this, which means whatever it about to happen is going to hurt me the same way it’s hurting him. I breathe in shakily, spinning the promise ring around my finger, giving him a small nod before getting the courage to talk.

“I know you do, I love you too. We’ve always been soulmates and always will be. You’re it for me, there will never be anyone else.” I cry out, feeling like I’m saying a goodbye rather than reassuring him. He nods his head frantically, showing me that he agrees with my statement completely. I watch him open his mouth to speak, before another cry rips out from his throat, one that sounds completely and utterly heartbroken. I immediately wince upon hearing it, feeling my heart spike as I realize what he was leading up to, as I realize the what he’s about to do for the both of us. I’m unable to open my mouth to talk, completely losing my mind as I sob and shake my head no, hoping it’s enough to stop him before he says it. It didn’t work.

“I love you. I love you so much that I’m doing this for you, I’m doing it for the both of us. I’m breaking up with you, I’m so sorry baby.” He sobs out, feeling like he lost the one thing that ever truly mattered to him. The one thing that he’d give his career up for. I sit there completely frozen, unable to comprehend the words that just came out of his mouth, before my body shakes with the sobs I let out. I feel my chest physically ache like someone tried to rip my heart out, instantly reaching my hands up to hold my chest in hopes of easing the pain. I knew that heartbreak sucked, I just never knew how much it’d actually hurt.

“Please.. please don’t do this. I love you Ruel. I need you.” I cry out, my voice sounding so unattached from me, that I barely even register the words coming out. He watches me as tears and sobs shake his body, taking in everything about me for what he knows will be the last time for awhile. I watch the way his red rimmed green eyes flit over me through the screen, drinking me in with all that he can. Not even realizing my eyes are doing the same through their teary filled gaze.

“I love you baby, I love you with all I’ve got. I’m doing this for you, you need to focus on school and working for everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I don’t want you to miss out on living your life over there just because I can’t be with you. I’m only getting in the way of that, which means I need to let you go.” He whispers out, our tears having finally been drained from our bodies, leaving us in a broken silence. I don’t reply for a second, only hearing the shaky breathing we’re both releasing, before I come to terms with the fact that he won’t change his mind about this.

“I love you too. Promise you won’t forget about me? No matter what happens, you can’t forget about me-“ I whisper out, watching the pained look on his face when my voice cracks. He gives me a shaky smile, his eyes filled with disbelief at my question. He opens his mouth to respond, but I beat him to it, not fully done with my requests. “and I’ll always be your best friend right? Like you’ll like all my insta posts still and you’ll always tell me happy birthday?” I whimper out, knowing that the requests might sound dumb, but he’ll understand what I mean. He gives me the same boyish grin I fell in love with, a few stray tears making their way down his puffy face.

“Baby I could never forget about you, you’re my whole world. You’ll be my best friend till the day I die, I’ll like all your posts as soon as you post them, since I have notifs for you, and I’ll tell you happy birthday at 12 like I do every time. I promise with everything inside of me.” He states, trying to make his voice as strong as possible, but still not being able to fully hide the tremors that shake his voice. I give him a smile, knowing how terrible I must look right now, but not caring as I gaze at the beautiful boy who will always hold my heart in his hands.

“One last thing... promise you’ll love me forever?” I choke out, feeling the way the call was on its way towards ending, wanting to hold on to any last bit of him for as long as I could. He lets out a exasperated scoff at my question, not even knowing where to start with it.

“I’ll love you till the day I die and even after that. Our love is eternal sweetheart, no matter what we’ll always make our way back to each other. I promise.” He states with so much conviction, leaving no room to even question him. I nod my head and watch him, feeling my heart break all over again as I realize it’s time to say goodbye. It’s time to say goodbye to the love of my life. To my best friend. We spend a few minutes staring at each other, not wanting to deal with the inevitable outcome of ending this call.

“This isn’t a goodbye, it’s just a see you later, okay? We’ll be together again, but not till the times right for us. I’m not giving up on you. I love you.” He breathily lets out, staring into my eyes with nothing but pure love in his eyes. I whimper as he finishes his sentence, feeling my heart officially tear into two, knowing this was it. I wipe my eyes hastily, not wanting to miss the last seconds I have with him, wanting to look at him one last time before we end this call.

“I won’t give up on you either, I’ll see you later. I love you.” I whisper out, watching the way he looks me over one final time. We send each other heartbroken smiles as I kiss my ring and he kisses his necklace, neither of us knowing when we’ll be together again. He gives me a small wave while blowing a tiny kiss to the screen before the call disconnects, leaving me completely shattered.

———

Days seemed to pass by slower than ever, all filled with endless calls from the Van Dijk family, excluding the one person I wanted to call me the most. The breakup hurt their family almost as much as it hurt me, endless amounts of tears over FaceTime calls as the girls and Kate called me, not believing that we would ever break up. The moment they saw my puffy eyes and tear streaked face I could almost hear their hearts break, but slowly time seemed to heal my wounds. I wouldn’t say fully healed even if it’s been 2 years, but healed enough to where I can look at pictures of us without it ripping my heart out. This morning when I woke up, I saw that he had sent me a birthday message at 12, just like he always does and promised to continue doing so, leaving me a teary eyed mess from missing him.

Today I was meeting up with Coco and Sylvie for my birthday brunch, since the two flew down to Los Angeles to spend some time with me during my college holiday break. I stood in front of my mirror, putting on my final touches of makeup, and adjusting my clothes. Once I felt ready to leave, I walk out of my apartment and head down the street, to the small pastry shop the girls wanted to meet at.

As I walk in, I feel my stomach fill with excitement, ready to see the two girls who I love more than myself. Before I can even spot them, I hear Coco shriek, immediately running to pull me into a bone crushing hug. As soon as she lets me go so that I can breathe, I end up pulled into another tight hug, watching her laugh as Sylvie practically strangled me. Sylvie pulls away and drags me to the table they have, having already ordered for all of us since they know my order by heart after being so close all these years. They cheer out their happy birthdays to me once we sit down, handing me the gifts they bought me before they both look at me from across the table, with matching grins but what appears to be a slight hesitant look in their eyes.

“Spill the tea, I can tell by the looks on your faces you have something to say” I laugh out, watching as Coco roll her eyes. I give them a reassuring smile, hoping to ease their nerves on whatever they have to say, but feeling a pit form in my stomach since I know it probably has to do with the person I still haven’t moved on from. Sylvie takes in a deep breathe, reaching out to grab my hand that’s on the table, giving it a light squeeze. I’m immediately on edge at her actions, my mind instantly jumping to the worst conclusions, the first one being that he got a new girlfriend. Let’s just say I was completely wrong with my assumptions.

“Have you moved on?” Sylvie blurts out, completely throwing me off, because they would be the first two to know if I ever did. I stare at them with wide eyes, not sure on how to reply to the question, because there’s obviously a reason they’d have brought that up. I open and close my mouth a few times as I try to come up with something to say. The looks on their faces become more uneased at my lack of a response, causing me to blurt our the last thing I’d want to say.

“How can I move on when I check your brothers insta at least once every hour?-” I spill out, watching their faces instantly switch to those of amusement. I let out a groan at my embarrassing confession, covering my face as it heats up, praying that the ground will just swallow me whole. I uncover my face so that I can try and salvage what’s left of my dignity, “what I meant was that I haven’t moved on to anyone else, like the first thing I did when I woke up was check to see if he sent me a message. Why would you think I did?” I question them. I watch as both sets of eyes travel to the neckline of shirt, before they slowly trail back to my eyes, both with perplexed expressions.

“It’s just that your necklace is off, like you haven’t taken that necklace off ever, but all of a sudden it’s not on you?” Coco slowly states, immediately causing my hand to fly up to my neck, feeling my shirt rather than the promise ring, meaning that my necklace was indeed missing from my body. I let out a groan as I realize I had left it in my bathroom, having had taken it off before my shower earlier, and not putting it back on when I left. The necklace only ever leaves my body when I shower, meaning that it’s permanent residence is right against my chest, the same place the promise ring has layer ever since our breakup.

“Fuck, I never put it back on after my shower. It’s on the counter of the bathroom, I must’ve forgot it since I was so excited about seeing you guys” I mumble out, feeling like I was missing part of me without the ring, especially on a day like today. The girls give me sympathetic looks, knowing how much it means to me, especially since it’s the only thing I have that really connects me to Ruel. The girls swiftly change the conversation and talk about some of the gossip going around, before deciding we should just head back to my place.

Once we get back to my place we all sit down on my couch, their eyes wandering around and checking out some of the new things I’ve added since the last time they visited, softly smiling as they see I still have pictures of Ruel and I around. Coco grabs a frame and sends me a sad smile, her eyes looking over the photo fondly, what just so happened to be my favorite picture of us. The picture is one of my fondest memories of when Ruel and I were still together, we were all hanging out together on the beach, and Sylvie had snapped a pic when we weren’t paying attention. Our skin was glowing in the orange light from the sunset while he looked down at me with a lovestruck grin and I was laughing at something Kate had said, as I lay sprawled across his lap. I don’t think I’d ever been happier than I was at that moment.

“I miss you guys being together, but I know you’ll find your ways back to each other. You have to” Coco whispers out, with teary eyes as she thinks about the pain Ruel and I had gone through with the breakup, and the pain she knows we’re still feeling without each other. Sylvie nods her head while humming in agreement with her sister, silently praying that things work out soon, knowing her brother hasn’t been the same since everything happened between us. I give them a small shrug, my own eyes tearing up, knowing what they want won’t happen anytime soon, and I was right.

———

“You have got to be fucking with me?” I groan out, having just listened to the plans Coco just dragged me into. I hear her let out a sigh of frustration, annoyed that her plan wasn’t working out the way she had hoped, and knowing she was silently cursing me in her head. I hear Sylvie mumbling something to her in the background, before hearing Kate and Michelle make noises of agreement. I instantly tense up once she starts talking again, knowing that there was no way out of these plans she had set up.

“You promised you’d see us all tonight since it’s been a few months, you can’t break a promise. Please I promise it’ll be fun, please?” She states out, her tone becoming slightly pleading towards the end. I let out a sigh, running a hand down my face as I think about what would happen if I went. Like she has to understand why I don’t want to go, this isn’t going to just affect only me. I hear silence on the other line, knowing they’re crowded around the phone, waiting for me to answer, I take a deep breath before speaking up.

“Guys this isn’t only going to affect me. We were supposed to all see each other, you never said it would be at a concert. Let alone at fucking Ruels concert. I don’t think I can” I mutter out, feeling my heart constrict at the thought of him. It might’ve been 4 years since the breakup, but that doesn’t mean my heart doesn’t still hurt when I think of him. We’ve talked since the breakup, but it’s only ever been for birthdays, some holidays, and random messages here and there to say we hope the other is doing well. All in all, we’ve basically not legitimately interacted since the breakup, because I don’t think either of us could ever be just friends with each other. Trying to be friends would only hurt us.

“Please, I wouldn’t have you go if I knew it would hurt him. I love you both too much to do something that could harm either of you, please just trust me on this. He’d want you there.” She softly states, knowing how sensitive this topic was becoming the more I thought of him. I let out a quiet groan, before quietly agreeing to go with them. I hear them let out cheers, all of them ecstatic at the fact that they were able to get me to agree to go. Completely oblivious to the plan they had made, the plan that I set into action by agreeing to go.

“Yes! See you soon babes, love you” Coco shrieks, barely letting me reply before hanging up. I sigh as I stare at my blank screen, fiddling with my ring as it lays against my chest, before heading to my room to get ready for the events taking place in a little bit. I start doing my hair, thinking about all the possibilities tonight holds, like the thought of being face to face with him seems unreal, I can only hope he doesn’t feel uncomfortable with me being there.

I hum along to my playlist as I move on to my makeup, before freezing as a familiar tune starts playing. I listen as the beginning of painkiller fills my room, the memories from when this song was first written coming to the front of my mind. He had been nervously watching me as I lay across his bed, before hesitantly speaking up to tell me he wrote me a song, and of course I eagerly told him to sing it. I remember when he first started, I was completely enamored by him, feeling my eyes well up as I listened to the lyrics. That day was the first time we had said I love you to each other, when we both truly realized how much we meant to each other. That song means more to me than anything else in the world, it’s not just the song that’s important to me, but the day that means everything to me.

I clear my throat, dabbing at my eyes to get rid of any unwanted moisture, as I finally come back to my senses when the song finishes. I let out a sigh, continuing on with my makeup, before finally finishing up. I check my phone and see that Coco will be getting me in 20 minutes to head out, instantly causing me to rush around to find an outfit. While he probably feels nothing for me after so much time, I still want to at least look decent when we cross paths again. I get my clothes on and look at myself in the mirror, before deciding it’s good enough. I head out of my apartment and walk out, instantly spotting Coco standing outside a car waiting for me. I run over to her, instantly embracing her in a tight hug, having missed her more than anything the past couple months it’s been since I saw her last.

“Ready for tonight?” She questions with a look in her eyes that I can’t decipher, but immediately puts me on edge. I narrow my eyes as I look at her, trying to gauge her emotions, because Coco isn’t Coco without some sort of insane plan. She stares at me with doe eyes, appearing completely innocent, while she waits for me to reply to her.

“I don’t know, it’s been 4 years Co. Like that’s a long time and I don’t want to burden him you know” I whisper out, glancing out the window while feeling insecure at the thought of him possibly not wanting to even see me. Coco rolls her eyes at the back of my head, knowing that Ruel is still just as in love with me as he was when we were still together. She puts her hand on my knee and lets me think for the remainder of the car ride, while she tries to hide the smirk on her face, knowing the plan she had was going to work out perfectly on the unsuspecting pair.

We pull into the venue, getting escorted through the back entrance by security guards so that the fans couldn’t see either of us. I’m thankful the fans couldn’t see us because of the fact that they’d recognize me immediately, and start rumors on social media, even though there have been plenty of them since we broke up. Especially since he still likes all my insta posts and comments on them every now and then, fueling the fans to believe that the breakup wasn’t real. The real fans know it was though, they could sense the instant change and shift in us, no matter how hard we tried to act happy and fine on our socials for them. Little did I know, Coco was happy the fans couldn’t see me since it would fuck up her plan, because Ruel would basically be instantly notified of my presence.

We walk through hallways backstage before Coco leads me into a small room, where I’m instantly pulled into hug by Kate. She rocks us side to side, holding me as tight as she can, while the girls stand around with teary eyes watching the interaction. We finally pull away from the hug, Kate putting her hand on my face as she watches me with a look of pure motherly adoration, instantly making my eyes water with emotion.

“My other baby is finally back” Kate whispers out, the grin never leaving her face, feeling complete that all her girls and her son were finally in one place again. Kate has always called me one of her baby’s or her daughter, because she said I was destined to be her daughter in-law so why not just start early. I let out a small laugh at the way Coco and Sylvie have their phones out to record, before walking over to give Sylvie a hug. We pull away and she compliments my outfit, before pushing me into the arms of Michelle. I let out a laugh as Michelle whispers that if I ever disappear for 4 years again, she’d kill Ruel and I for doing that to everyone again. We pull away from the hug and stand around conversing with each other about anything and everything, before the door opens and someone walks in.

“Oh you little fucking shit-” He laughs out as I turn my head, just to be pulled into a bone crushing hug by Nate. I laugh as he squeezes me, before letting me go to give me a stern look, causing me to smirk at him knowing he’s about to lecture me. I watch as he takes a deep breathe, getting mentally prepared for whatever he’s about to say, “you don’t understand the hell I had to deal with the past four years, I’ve almost strangled him a good couple of times. Does he know you’re here?” He groans out at first, before ending with an intrigued look. I shake my head at his question, causing him to look at the girls in surprise, completely unaware of the mission they were on. I see Michelle give him a look, causing him to smile and give her a slight nod, leaving me perpelexed on what everyone seemed to be planning.

“Well he’s doing soundcheck right now, so I got to go check on him, because I don’t trust him. Like I don’t care if he’s 21, he’s still not trustworthy enough to be alone without me” Nate groans with an eye roll, causing us all to laugh at the mischief Ruel causes, my heart clenching since it was one of the things I fell in love with about him. Nate sends me one last smile before heading out, leaving us in the room together yet again. I watch as Coco sends Kate a look, before turning to me with a blinding grin on her face. I instantly tense up knowing she has to be up to something, there’s no other reason she’d have a smile on her face like that.

“So Kate and Michelle have to go see Ruel to just to check in on him, Sylvie wants to go find a vending machine for something to drink, and I need to find a bathroom to fix my makeup in” she explains, watching the way my eyes wander over her flawless face, seeing no reason for her to fix the makeup. Before I can question her, I’m already being pulled out of the room, and down a series of hallways. She stops outside of a light brown door, throwing it open and pushing me inside with her. I try to look around to see what room we’re in, but Coco immediately starts talking, completely distracting me from even trying to look around.

“Can you help me fix my lipstick, I feel like it’s getting on my teeth, and check the lining of it please” she practically begs, causing me to nod my head with a laugh. She hands me a q-tip from the table next to her and I instantly get to work, completely transfixed on the task at hand. I wipe around the inner lining of her lips, making sure it’s still perfect but not too far back to get on her teeth, because who wants red stained teeth. Next I move on to the outline of her lips, lightly trying to straighten certain areas, praying I won’t drag it onto her foundation. As I’m fixing her lipstick, her phone buzzes, causing her to pull away from me abruptly. I let out a surprised gasp, instantly narrowing my eyes at the look on her face, since she seemed ready to combust.

“Wait right here, I have to go grab my lip liner, I forgot to put some on, and don’t want my lipstick to just disappear over the duration of tonight. Don’t move, I’ll be right back” she all but shrieks out, jogging out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her. I stand there watching the door, perplexed on what everyone seemed to be planning for me, before deciding to take a look around the room. I walk over to the desk, looking over some of the trinkets laying there, before the door is thrown open and someone’s shouting.

“Why are you shoving me in here? Coco don’t make me bite you lil bitch, Nate stop groping me for fucks sake” I hear an overly familiar Australian voice yell, watching the scuffling take place, before he finally gets shoved in and the door slams shut. I stand there frozen, comeplety in shock by the boy in front of me, my heart feeling like it might burst out of my chest. I stay silent as he bangs on the door, before spinning around with an eye roll when he realizes the doors blocked, only to freeze upon seeing me. We stay silent, both of us just staring at each other, taking in all the changes from growing up, and taking in all the familiar things we fell in love with about each other.

“It’s been a while, yeah?” He mumbles out, playing with his fingers anxiously. I lightly scuff my shoe on the ground, too nervous to make eye contact with him right now, especially when I know my feelings for him never went away. I nod my head and continue to stare at my shoes, before looking up when he moves to stand in front of me. We make direct eye contact when I look up, his green eyes filled with an emotion I couldn’t quite decipher, but felt oddly familiar.

“It’s been four really fucking long years, which means we got some catching up to do after this concert, but uh only if you want to. I would love it if you did” he questions, giving me a anxious smile, it slowly dropping when I hesitate to answer. As soon as I see his smile drop and his eyes dim, I immediately reach out and place my hand on his arm, watching the way his eyes widen at the contact.

“Yeah, I would really like that.” I softly state, watching him give me a boyish grin, instantly causing my face to heat up as I look away. Upon noticing my head turn away, he smirks at my blush and takes the opportunity to look at my outfit, his eyes instantly locking on the neckline of my top. I turn my head back to him to ask him a question, when I notice his eyes locked on my top, before I can ask what he’s looking at, he reaches a hand out. I freeze as his hand grabs on to my chain, sliding his fingers along it until the promise ring he gave me lands in his fingers. He twirls it around, completely entranced by it, and completely oblivious to how close we’d gotten to each other. I open my mouth to come up with an excuse as to why I’m wearing it, only to be left shocked when he gives me a teary grin, reaching underneath his own shirt, pulling out the pendant. I let out a quiet sob when I see the little silver pendant, only to be pulled straight into the arms of the boy I’ve loved my whole life. He holds me and rocks us back and forth, one hand pressed to the back of my head, the other wrapped around my shoulders.

“I kept all my promises. Told you I wasn’t going to give up on you.” He whispers in my ear as I hold him as tight as I can, never wanting to let him go. He pulls away from me and cups my cheek with his hand, before leaning down and pressing a light kiss to my forehead. He rests his forehead against mine for a few seconds, just taking in the moment while it lasts, before we’re both startled by the door flinging open. He immediately pushes me behind him, but the two had already seen all they needed to see.

“I KNEW IT WOULD WORK” Coco screeches, causing Nate to flinch as he stands with her, having came to collect Ruel since it was time to go on stage. Ruel rolls his eyes, but still has a lovesick smile on his face, before instinctively grabbing my hand and pulling me with him out the door. We walk hand in hand to where the stage is, hearing the thousands of fans out there screaming and chanting for him to come out, before coming to a stop next to the stairs for the stage. He looks at our hands before blushing and dropping them, leaving me there with a confused and slightly hurt expression. Upon seeing my face he instantly panics and starts rushing to explain himself.

“It’s not that I don’t want to hold your hand, I just don’t want to rush straight into things after a four year break. Trust me, it’s taking everything inside of me to not just jump back into how we used to be” he groans out, I laugh and grab his hand, really noticing how his hand still fits in mine perfectly. I get a little lost in thought, but come back when Ruel gives my hand a squeeze, just like what he would do back in the day.

“I get it, I want to rebuild everything too... I really missed you, like I never moved on from you.” I whisper out, before Ruel pulls me in, holding me tight against him. He places a light kiss on top of my head, before holding me for a little longer. Nate comes over and tells him he has about a minute until he needs to go up, causing him to groan, not wanting to leave me when he just got me back. I laugh and pull myself out of his arms, tilting my head up to look straight into his eyes.

“I never moved on from you either, I couldn’t. I told you we’d find the way when the time was right” he smirks out, causing me to roll my eyes, trust him to make a sweet situation cocky. He laughs at my attitude, before giving me one last squeeze, and holding his hand out. I look at it before sending him a giant smile, already knowing what he wanted to do. Neither of us noticed, but Michelle and everyone came to stand and watch, as Ruel and I did our pre-concert ritual. It was a handshake we had made as children, but kept adding on to the older we got. We finish it off, with the usual pinky promise, both of us kissing the opposite end, before he quickly kisses my cheek and bounds up the stairs. I stand there in shock, holding my blushing cheek, before turning my head to the girls who all hold knowing smirks.

“Looks like he added another thing to the ritual” Coco laughs out, causing me to roll my eyes, turning to watch Ruel from the side stage. He welcomes the crowd and starts to sing, the fans instantly singing every word, and watching him like he put the stars in the sky. After the first song, he turns to the band and asks them to pause really fast, making all of us confused, since this was not a planned break.

“I’m sorry if I’m a little jumpy today, or if I’m just a complete mess. I just got to reunite with the girl I’ve been in love with since I was a kid after four years apart, so yeah I am a mess-” he starts off, looking over to me with a large smile. I instantly blush and grin back at him, overwhelmed that he still feels the same way about me after all this time. The crowd starts screaming my name and chanting out the ship name they created for us way before we even got together, causing everyone to start laughing. Ruel glances over at me again as he starts talking, “I told you it wasn’t a goodbye, it was just a see you later. Even the fans knew I was never going to get over you, I honestly didn’t even want anyone else. It’s always been you.” He mumbles out. The fans instantly screaming as loud as they can, while I stand there in awe, tears streaming down my face. He jogs over and gives me a hug, before promising to spend all his time on catching up with me after the concert, leaving me there to sing my heart out to the songs that were written by the boy I love.

That night, I rekindled a love that was never lost, but rather put on hold. I know we said we’d take it a little slow, but that night I slept in the arms of the love of my life, feeling like I was whole again for the first time in years. I felt the overwhelming love I have for him completely fill me to the brim, because he’s not only my best friend, but he’s my soulmate. It’s always been him.

#ruelvincentvandijk #ruel van dijk #one ruel #ruel #ruel imagines #ruel imagine #ruel one shot #imagines #imagine #one shot #x reader #free time ep #ruel fanfic

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krissy-kat · 4 years

Text

PJOverse Headcanons Pt 6:-

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 7, Part 8

Harley

• The senior year wasn’t fun at all like in those high school dramas that Abbie likes to see, instead it was filled with stress of checking out the best scholarships, applying into colleges and worrying about getting in

• But throughout his senior year, Harley followed Spiderman news religiously

• “You know your celebrity crush on spiderman is worst than your pinning for Peter”

• “Nobody asked you Abbie”

• “Yeah whatever, I came here to tell you I want to go to Camp Half Blood this year because it’s probably your last year and I want to go there with you”

• “Really!”

• “Yeah”

• “Ok I’ll IM Chiron and ask him right away”

• “Calm down it’s getting late, ask him tomorrow”

• About 2 months before summer vacation, Harley receives a IM from MJ

• “Not that I’m complaining but you don’t IM me without a purpose, so what is it”

• “You are right, I trained you well ”

• “So”

• “You complained way too much when Peter stopped coming to Camp”

• “I’m sorry but what does this IM have to do with it ”

• “Let me finish first loser, Peter’s coming to Camp for the first week of Summer and you don’t come to Camp in the first week like ever, so I thought I let you know because I won’t be able to listen you whining about it all summer ”

• “Really!”

• “Yup, I gotta go now talk to you later ”

• “Bye”

• Harley informs Tony about change in plan

• “What urgent business do you have that has to be done in the first week, it’s like every one wants to abandon me that week ”

• “What happened Old Man”

• “Pepper have to Europe to check on branches there, Spiderman is going on a trip with his best friend and now even you aren’t coming that week”

• “Don’t be overdramatic, you’ll be fine and you are acting like we aren’t staying at all, we’ll staying with you in the last week of vacation ”

• “Wait a sec, we”

• “Did I not mention Abbie will be coming too”

• “What do mean Abbie is coming doesn’t she have Roman Camp to go ”

• “We have Exchange programs, so Abbie will be coming this year ”

• “So you are saying during the last week of summer, I’ll have handle not one, not two but three demigods, one of which will be starting high school, one senior year and one college next week, you guys are gonna make all my hair grey with stress of handling 3 overexcited ADHD teenagers”

• “Wait, three”

• “My intern is a demigod too, that’s why you guys won’t be meeting anytime soon”

• “Awww”

• Meanwhile in New York

• “What do mean you told Harley I’ll be coming in the first week”

• “It means exactly what you said ”

• “But MJ, I’m a bi disaster you can’t do that to me”

• “I already did ”

• “B..But”

• In the summer vacation Peter and Gang go to Camp

Summer Vacation

Day 1

• Ned stays in Athena Cabin with Peter

• “So when will I finally get to meet the famous Harley Keener”

• “He told me he’ll be coming in Evening so he’ll here soon” - MJ

• As of on clue, they hear a bantering between 2 voices, one that MJ recognize as of Harley’s

• “I can carry own luggage, I’m 14 not a toddler, you don’t need to carry it for me”

• “But I want to”

• MJ wanted to see how it unfolds, but Ned decided to be his sweet self and help them without even knowing that was Harley

• “Do you guys need any help, my friends and I would love to help you both” - Ned

• “Are new because I don’t remember seeing around last summer ” -Harley

• “He’s Ned, hey Harley, it’s been a long time ” - Peter said with heart eyes

• “Hey Peter ” - Harley

• They stare into each other’s eyes, Abbie couldn’t take the sexual tension and interrupts their longing gaze

• “Harley care to introduce me your friends”

• “Umm.. Yeah, this is Peter, he’s a son of Athena” -Harley

• “Hi” -Peter

• “This is Betty, daughter of Apollo ”

• “Nice to meet you”

• “That is MJ, daughter of Ares ”

• “Sup, loser”

• “That is Flash, son of Aphrodite, I don’t why he’s with them”

• “Ha Ha, very funny ”

• “No seriously I’m really confused last I heard MJ still had a grudge with you and now she is letting you hang out her”

• Abbie controls her laughter at Harley’s lack of tact

• “Well it’s been a whole year and we go to same High school, we can resolve it during the school year, you know ” -Flash

• “Wait a second, you go to same high school as MJ” -Harley

• “Harley we have been going to same school since before High School” -Betty

• “You go to same school too, next you’ll telling me Peter and the new kid go there as well” -Harley

• Betty, Peter, Ned and Flash avoids his stares, and MJ smirks meanwhile Abbie trying her best to not laugh at her brother’s dummbassry

• “Why the hell did I not know about this ” -Harley

• At this Abbie couldn’t control her laughter

• “You truly are a dumbass, let’s go keep the luggage in the Cabin, have dinner and discuss this in tomorrow, so you can recover from the shock ” -Abbie

• “You seem to be a smart person, this dumbass forgot to introduce you ” -MJ

• “I’m Abbie, this Dumbass’s sister”

• “Are you sure” -MJ

• “Unfortunately ” -Abbie

• “I’m right here” -Harley

Day 2

• “Sooo… was anyone of you planning to tell me that you all go to same school” -Harley

• “Don’t look at me, it wasn’t like we ever talked outside of when necessary ” -Flash

• “I thought you would know since you never asked how we knew each other already” -Peter

• “I thought MJ must have told you ” -Betty

• “And I thought everyone knew” -MJ

• “Why?” -Harley

• “Everyone knows, you were to busy staring Peter’s butt to notice” -MJ

• Harley and Peter turned red

• “So what do you guys do here exactly ” -Ned

• “We…. I don’t think even I know what we do exactly, most of time we do our own things and come together during Camp Activities ” -Flash

• “So, like we don’t have any schedule ” -Abbie

• “Well there are cleaning duties, the team that loses in the game are stuck with them” -Betty

• “No other duties” -Abbie

• “Nope” -Betty

• “You Greeks are so disorganized ” -Abbie

• “Of course, you would think that ” -Harley

• “You’re the one talk, Mr-I-can’t-work-without-mess” -Abbie

• “Can we please not have a sibling argument right now ” -Peter

• “I wanted to see that, what happened to you” -MJ

• “There was fight about spiderman in the morning, one his sibling said that she thought spiderman was cool and it escalated from that, Peter was right in middle of it” -Ned

• “Poor Peter” -Betty

• Ned quickly changes the subject

• “So what do you guys mean when you say you do your own things ” - Ned

• “I draw and sometimes spar” -MJ

• “I help out in infirmary and practice Archery ”-Betty

• “I work in Forges on my inventions” -Harley

• “When I came during the freshman year, I used to design the weapons so I spend most my time in Forges too” -Peter

• Flash mumbles something

• “What did he say” -Abbie

• “I do Aphrodite stuff, and spar” -Flash

• “What do you mean Aphrodite stuff” -Ned

• “He means gossiping, makeovers and meddling with others relationship ” -MJ

• “Well I’m pretty good fighter too” -Flash

• “That’s because you are on Instagram all the time and you have to defend yourself against the monster you attract” -MJ

• “Wait, you can do that” -Harley

• “He attracts atleast one monster every week” -Betty

• “It’s really hard to keep up with you guys, do even complete a discussion before jumping to another ” -Abbie

• “No” “Nay” “Nope” “Never” “Who does that” “That’s what you do” they say all at once

• “No wonder why Roman gets irritated while talking to you guys” -Abbie

• “Technically I’m a roman too” -Ned

• “Wait, I thought you were Peter’s half sibling ” -Harley

• “He’s Peter grand-nephew” -Flash

• “Flash, how many times I have to tell you not call him that ” -Peter

• “What are you going to do beat me?” -Flash

• “Maybe, I’ll do that ” -Peter

• “Than I’ll challenge you to a duel” -Flash

• “I accept ”-Peter

• “I got a idea, how about we make it in a team of two” -Flash

• “Why not?” -Peter

• “I’m a Archer, I can’t play so I’m out” -Betty

• “I don’t even have a weapon so I’m out too” -Ned

• “That leaves us with MJ and Harley, I pick MJ” -Flash

• “Sure, why not” -MJ

• “I thought you would team with me, MJ” -Peter

• “He picked me up first ” -MJ

• “But” -Peter

• “No Buts” -Flash

• “Okay we’ll meet here in an hour, if I win you’ll stop calling Ned my grand-nephew and if you win I’ll do the photo you wanted me too” -Peter

• “I agree” -Flash

• Flash and Peter took off into opposite directions and MJ following Flash while Harley follows Peter with Abbie chasing after him

• “Wait, what just happened and what is Ned’s parentage again ” -Abbie

• “Flash and Peter are having an impromptu duel while they team up with MJ and I respectively and one of Ned’s grandparents is child of Minerva, keep up ” -Harley

• “You got all that from the conversation and you still didn’t knew they all go to same school ” -Abbie

• “Yes, now I need go prepare with Peter for the fight” -Harley

• “You really are a dumbass” -Abbie

• Meanwhile

• “You knew Peter would take the bait and team with Harley didn’t you, it was your elaborate matchmaking ” -MJ

• “Maybe, plus I knew he would offer to finally take a picture in spiderman suit with me for my insta and I needed to win that bet” -Flash

• “What if I sabotaged the fight” -MJ

• “You haven’t lost a single fight except the one you and Clarisse fought each other, you don’t want to ruin your reputation ” -Flash

• “Ok, you got me there” -MJ

To be continued

( If you were wondering why I took so much time for Pt 6, I wanted to post it with this post)

Also I’ll be tagging those who want me to undercut, if you want me tag you DM me

@doodleddaisies

#parkner #peter parker #harley keener #michelle jones #betty brant #flash thompson #ned leeds #abbie keener #tony stark #pjoverse au #son of aphrodite! flash #son of athena! peter #son of hephaestus! harley #daughter of vulcan! abbie #daughter of apollo! betty #daughter of ares! michelle #legacy of minerva! ned

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sisoyyoalgunproblema · 4 years

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Okay, so I’ve never written fanfic for Skam, not skam españa not the OG Skam, it’s just been something I’ve never actually done, there’s a lot of really great fanfiction out there already about the Skam Univers and I never thought I had anything to contribute, but I decided to do it for Eva’s appreciation week because she’s probably my favourite character and I really needed to think about how she dealt with quarantine.

Know that English is not my first language, but I think I’ve managed just fine.

Eva was mindlessly watching Física o Química on TV as she scrolled through insta. Nora had finally admitted that she’d never watched the show and they’d decided to introduce her to El Zurbarán as a way to get through quarantine, so her best friends’ faces were watching the show, concentrated on her computer screen.

Eva smiled to herself, those girls were the only reason she hadn’t lost her mind yet. She wasn’t stupid, she knew Cris didn’t like watching TV, Amira didn’t think the show was all that good and Nora hadn’t been particularly interested on watching a TV show from the late 2000 about Spanish teens who had very questionable tastes on fashion, only Viri had been sincerely interested on rewatching it. But the show gave Eva a very comfortable feeling, a feeling that reassured her that everything was gonna be okay, she’d watched the show a few times so she knew what was about to happen and she needed to be certain of something at the moment, it didn’t matter what that was.

The fact that those four amazing girls had decided to watch the show with her, that she could see Viri’s concentrated frown as she pretended to eat pop-corn, just to make her feel better. The fact that they were there for her even if they couldn’t actually be there physically made her feel so grateful and loved she didn’t really know how to handle it.

But tonight not even Paula and Gorka fighting could get her mind off the fact that her mom wasn’t there, that her mom was working at the hospital, that she’d been working there non stop for weeks, in the first line of fire. One of the nurses who worked with her had died from COVID that same day and Eva couldn’t stop her mind from wondering if her mom was gonna be the next, she wasn’t young like before, she was quickly approaching her 60s and the virus was unpredictable and got scarier the older you got. Her mom kept reassuring her that she’d be alright, she followed protocol and was feeling just fine, even if a little bit tired, but Eva couldn’t help but follow her around like a lost puppy whenever she had a day off, making sure she didn’t cough, that her temperature was low, that she was still healthy, that she wouldn’t leave her.

She asked her mom questions she hadn’t before, about her childhood, about her grandparents, about her high school years, she drank that information like it was water on the desert, determined to be with her mom, to learn about her, to share memories together so that, in case something happened, she wouldn’t be forgotten, so that she’d had more things to remember her by. She learned that her mom hadn’t really had a tight group of friends until collage, that she was extremely proud of Eva for fighting for her friendships, for letting them grow around her and become a part of herself, she learned that her mom saw more of what was going on than she let on and that she’d wished Eva had wanted to bring her problems to her so that, even if she couldn’t help her daughter, she could at least share her pain.

Eva told her things too, she told her about her fight with Inés and about Jorge and about Cristian, she asked her mom if someone could really get over their first love, if the longing ever stopped or if she was condemned to feel the butterflies in her stomach every time Jorge smiled at her, even when she wasn’t sure that he still felt them too, or that they’d make sense together after a year and a half apart. Her mom didn’t really speak, she just held her daughter and thanked the universe because, even if the pandemic was scary, even tough she was terrified of crossing the hospital’s doors every day, even if she was scared of bringing the virus home to Eva, even if she knew getting it herself was a very real possibility and that death was part of the illness, that whole situation had brought her daughter closer to her in a way she didn’t expect, and for that she was grateful.

It was a very stupid think what made Eva cry, Inés had posted an Instagram story of her mom in the kitchen, laughing about some cooking mishaps. The jealousy ate her alive and then came the guilt. It was not Inés’ fault that her mom could work from home, that she didn’t have to worry about her health. But it was unfair and that unfairness broke her.

It had not been the first time she’d cried during quarantine, but it was the first time she’d done it in front of other people, it was not like Eva was someone who tried to hide her feelings, she resembled an open book way more than she did a stone, but she’d tried to put on a strong face for her mom, to keep strong, but she was alone in the house and it was unfair and it hurt, and the love those girls had for her felt like the safest place in the world, so she let herself go.

As always, Nora was the first one to realize Eva had tears streaming down her face, the girl had tried to cry quietly, but Nora and Eva had something resembling a sixth sense when it came to each other, they were more in tune to one another than the other girls, Eva could sense when Nora was sad and vice versa. So that the words of warning came out of the american girl didn’t surprise anyone, nor did the fact that all four girls paused their TVs and focused on their friend immediately after.

“Eva, are you okay?” Viri’s words only made her cry harder.

“You know, whatever it is, that you can tell us.” Amira’s hand itched to grab Eva’s and she almost cursed from frustration.

“Is it Jorge?” They all laughed at Cris, she was very well intentioned, but maybe she wasn’t the most perceptive one out of all of them. “I don’t know why you laugh, the last time she cried was because of him.”

“That was over a year ago, Cris!” Amira said, eyes filled with laughter.

“My point still stands.”

“It’s your mom, right?” Eva looked at Viri through their computer screens and nodded. Viri understood better than any of the other girls, her mom was mopping floors at some hospital at the moment. “They’ll be alright, you know? I’m sure of it.”

“I’m just grateful that I have you girls, I don’t know what I’d do without you. My mind would take me to some very scary places and I don’t want that.”

“We’ll be here, whatever happens.” Nora reassured her, big blue sympathetic eyes looking at her through the screen.

“But I’m sure nothing will.” Viri’s strength and determination made Eva smile. God, she really had the best friends in the world.

“I’m just scared. People are dying and my mom is right there, in the middle of it all, I know that even if she gets the virus it’s probably gonna be something like a really bad flu, but I can’t keep from wondering what if it isn’t? What if it’s worse? What if I loose her?”

“You wont.” They all promised, even if none of them could really know it, they wanted it to be true so bad that Eva believed it and smiled drying the tears with her sweater.

“And if something bad happens, you’ll always have us. Forever.” Nora reassured her.

“I love you girls. I wish I could hug you.”

“I hate quarantine.”

“God, you should see Dani, he has practically built a gym on our living room, I barely have any space to study.”

“You never do anyway.”

“I would if I had space.”

“No you wouldn’t.”

Viri, Nora and Eva watched Amira and Cris bickering while they laughed at the whole situation. Nora winked at Eva and she blew her a kiss.

“I really do love you, you know?” Eva said, for some reason, that day it felt very important for them to know.

“Yes we do.”

“We love you, too. When all of this is over we’ll celebrate. My rooftop is gonna be the heart of the summer.”

“Yeah, because Mallorca...”

“Don’t remind me, Nora, please.”

“What are we gonna do with the money?”

Eva mainly listened to their friends talk, the TV show forgotten on the background, she was emotionally exhausted, but her friends had a very strange way of making her feel everything was gonna be alright, and she felt lucky to have them by her side as she went through the most terrifying months of her life. She loved them, as simple as that.

#skam españa #skam spain #skamesp

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astarlightmonbebe · 5 years

Text

~DMing the Wrong Person; Stray Kids Hyung Line~

Bang Chan

So, Chan is a music producer and he has around 300k followers on Instagram

You honestly only followed him because he was good looking (yeah that’s a bit shallow but you actually bothered to listen to some of his beats and now you stan his music, too)

You’re just a chill fan of his, only have his post and story notifs on because you like to keep up but you’re not obsessive

Anyways so you found this really funny post with some screenshots of his recent live (which was at like midnight...and Chan was pretty tired...you love memes, you had to take advantage of him)

Chan’s insta is @prod_cb97 and you’re just scrolling through your contacts to ‘p’ to send to your friend, but it’s late and you accidentally click Chan’s name and send it before realizing your mistake

Of course you’re like ‘omg, I have to unsend that now’, but by the time you’ve exited over to it, it already says ‘seen’???

Cue: major freakout because what the heck is happening, why is he looking at your messages

AND THEN IT SHOWS HE’S TYPING?

911 is this a drill it’s 2 a.m. in the morning

He finally sends a message, ‘ik i’m a meme why do you guys bully me like this’

And you’re like; ‘jkdahfds I’M SO SORRY I’LL ESCORT MYSELF OUT’

But he’s all ‘noo, I was kidding’

Then he also adds; ‘those are high quality memes, I saved them’

Like, please, Chan, those memes were so ugly and you both knew it

You don’t know what else to say so you end up being all; ‘it’s two a.m., you should be sleeping !! us fans want you to be well rested :)’ and it sounds so weird???

You’re not that big of the fan...

It takes him a couple minutes, but he responds; ‘music doesn’t sleep :), but thank you for the concern!’

How is he so cute and cool at the same time...you’re a little bit starstruck because you’re follower account waves at 502 and his has a big ‘k’ on the end

You decide it’s time to get sleep, but then he sends you !! another !! message !!

‘Well...you know all about me, can I know a little bit about you? Anyone who creates such wholesome memes is worth getting to know’

Hmm, it almost sounds like a pickup line, but you’re not crazy

(okay, maybe a little, because you respond back with probably a little too much information than he had wanted and/or expected)

‘hi, I’m y/n and I’m just a uni student who likes way too many groups and people, I’m an art major at my college...’

He probably didn’t need to know that, you should stop, definitely

He replies back with three laughing emojis

Laughing emojis???? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??

You panic and say; ‘why are you laughing at me???!!!!’

‘oh...I’m sorry if that offended you, I just wasn’t expecting your present life story’.

Oh. You feel bad now. He was just being a nice person :(((.

‘No...I’m the one who is sorry.’

There is silence

It says ‘seen’ but he’s not typing?

Oh gosh you messed up for real this time

Ahhhhhh who let you be on Instagram at two a.m. again?????

Then, out of the darkness of that ‘seen’, there comes the sweetest words you’ve ever seen.

‘Tbh I actually was really touched at those memes because I sometimes really feel like I’m only appreciated for being handsome and not for my music...but you really made me feel like a real music person who even has memes made for them, and it made me happy 💗’

You’re over here in a puddle of tears because literally you feel like a fake fan since you don’t really keep up with him and you were so shallow in the beginning.

What comes out of your fingers is; ‘haha wow. that’s so sad because honestly you’re amazing and I have mega respect for you for being so young and doing all this stuff, also living off two hours of sleep (don’t do that). So my tbh is that you’re awesome and I’m not and like...2 a.m. feels???’

Someone stop you before you fully word vomit all over this conversation

Yet, he replies with a ‘:)’

After five minutes, the ‘typing’ icon pops up again, and he sends; ‘i hope we can talk more, y/n’

Uhhhh heck yeah you would love that, Chan would probably regret it when he learns you’re a mess all the time, but anyways!!!

‘me too’ you opt to say, and then; ‘but first, we should both sleep’

Chan likes your message; ‘we have an agreement’ he says, and then his online flag disappears, leaving you smiling at your phone.

Kim Woojin

Woojin actually goes to the same college as you

You have a few mutual friends and at a meet up one day you all exchanged numbers and instagram handles

Though you unfollowed a lot of those people, you personally found Woojin very cute and he posted song covers with his guitar too! and as you know, you’re a big music fan :) so you kept on following him

And he kept following you! You guys even comment on each other’s posts sometimes and join lives, as well as say hello to each other on campus

So maybe you started having an interest in him...but who’s to say?

Anyways one day you’re just bored and looking through insta stories instead of working on that big assignment that requires way to much work

Woojin’s posted a clip of a coming up cover on his story and you’re all like ‘oh that’s super cool’

Yet you have no courage to tell him that, so you’re just swiping past again when you’re sweaty fingers are all like ‘oh we would rather slide up instead of go right’ and suddenly you’ve sent a 100 sticker to him?

You’ve done what now?

You’re blessing instagram for being able to unsend things, but he has, once again, already seen it

It’s just your luck, really

‘thx so much’ he replies after liking your story response

‘ahaha...np’ you say, then add tentatively, ‘you’re so good at music, like you’re voice is so beautiful??’

‘aww, thank you~’ he says, and you let out a breath because you think the crisis has been averted, but suddenly...

‘you’re actually so good yourself! I really love your art, you’re super talented!’

(you personally think you SUCK at art but like,,,if Woojin thinks you’re good you must be a little, right?)

‘thanks but I’m not that good’ you reply with a laughing emoji

He sends you angry emojis next! and you’re like ??? what did I do wrong??

You wait anxiously as he’s typing

‘y/n, believe me when I say you and you’re art is so breathtaking’

It’s so short but...so good...you’re heart...is fluttering

Unsure of what to say, you like his message and send some soft heart emojis, unable to convey the emotion you feel right now

He sends a heart emoji right back, along with a blushy face

(what does that mean???)

You send one more heart and then the conversation is over, but you have a feeling that maybe something new has started as well

Maybe

Lee Minho

Minho is a famous model under JYP entertainment, and his handle is @youknow_itsminho

Firstly, you’re in love with his aesthetic, because every model picture he posts is like looking at an angel without wings.

Secondly, he always goes live all the time and it’s with his cats

People who respect and love their pets??? Yes.

Lives is how it happens, actually

You’re clicking around on Instagram, watching his live, and a notification from your friend comes in. You click on it, but your phone shorts out suddenly.

When it turns back on, it opens back up to your messages, so you quickly type out a response ‘lol’ and hit send.

It sends...but, ummm...that was not the convo you were having with your friend.

In fact, it’s to someone you’ve never even had a convo with

You quickly check the handle and, omg, it’s Minho’s account djshjkad!

When you clicked on the notification, you’re finger must have accidentally hit his account name instead.

‘At least he’s live still, so he probably won’t notice and doesn’t bother to check...’ you thought to yourself, because you were sure many people tried to talk to him since he had almost one million followers.

Haha...right?

So you go to sleep, turn off your phone and put it face down

But you forgot to turn off your ringer

At three in the morning it goes off right in your ear, really loudly

You’re already pissed at being awake and still half asleep, so when you see it’s an Instagram notification, you automatically assume it’s your friends and reply as you would to them without bothering to read the message.

‘WHY ARE YOU GUYS UP AT THREE A.M., LET ME SLEEP FOR GOODNESS SAKE I’M GOING TO BEAT YOU UP TOMORROW’

Not your finest moment,...but please, you need your beauty sleep

With that, you roll over and go back to sleep

In the morning, you wake up and go check Instagram, like you do every morning

You check your pms, but the top one shocks you so much you have to blink several times to make sure you’re not dreaming.

Minho??? He saw your ‘lol’?

Ahh...as it turns out he saw much more than just ‘lol’.

Remind you to never respond to notifications at three a.m. x.x

Then-this dude- sends you a selfie he took from snapchat or whatever with the caption ‘woken up at three a.m. from my fans’

Yes??? That’s you??? You’re sorry???

‘I’m sorry about that but dang man, no need to be so salty...’; you send

Also, you realize as you’re looking through instagram, he posted the snapshots of your message to him on his story with all these laughing emojis...THIS BOY NOW YOU’RE MAD

I mean he crossed out the handle and profile picture but you know that’s you and, really, that’s what matters right now

So you dm him again; ‘hey did you really need to post that I DIDN’T THINK I WAS THAT FUNNY’

More laughing emojis

You’re about ready to snap, but he sends you another picture with ‘i’m sorry’ scrawled over his beautiful face

You can’t help but smile at that, especially when he adds ‘i’ll talk to you tomorrow?’

‘to clear up this misunderstanding of course :)’ he is quick to add

‘of course’; you say, smiling as you log off

Seo Changbin

Changbin is your best friend’s scary older brother

He followed you first so you followed him back for courtesy’s sake

Plus you like to laugh at his bucket hat posts...

The bucket hat posts is how it all starts

He posts another one and you’re sending it to your friend to laugh about how he looks so soulless, but...ahah...their contacts are right next to each other and maybe you accidentally clicked his?

You’re really not sure how it happened, except the message is sent to Changbin and definitely not your friend

And wow, reading it back, that sounds so mean, especially considering you sent it to the person the message was about

He’s seen it

Oh...wow...you’re really screwed

You immediately try and send an apology that goes something along the lines of ‘I AM SO SO SORRY I SWEAR I DIDN’T MEAN FOR THAT TO COME OFF SO MEAN OR ANYTHING REALLY’

He sees it again

And leaves you like that for a whole hour

Where you just kind of turn your phone off and try and do something else but the anxiety keeps you checking your phone constantly

Finally he says ‘I’m used to people making fun of me and my hat, no big deal’

But that’s actually kind of sad, so you’re all like ‘:(((’

And he’s all ‘is this conversation done’

Which kind of slaps but like it’s all your fault anyways so whatever

You find some hug gif and send it to him, and then you get radio silence before he actually sends a ‘thanks’

Hmm...you can’t read sarcasm online...

‘are you being sarcastic?’ you ask

‘no, that made me smile’ he tells you and wow, you weren’t expecting him to be quite so touched by a random gif you found

‘i’m glad!’ you send him, and he actually sends a smiley face?

(he uses emojis? in all your years you had never pegged Seo Changbin as the emoji sending type of person. surprises happen, you guess)

‘I really am very sorry though :(’ you send again because you’re REALLY sorry

‘you’re forgiven, so don’t sweat over it haha’ he tells you

You guess that’s that but you still feel really bad about the whole situation, like you never thought you were a mean person, but that was pretty mean of you

You don’t want to bother him by apologizing again

So you just say ‘ah okay, I won’t~I hope you have a good day’

And he’s like ‘you too’

You can’t tell if he’s just using etiquette or if he really means it, but you’ll take what you can get

(you also never make fun of him or anyone ever again, having learned your lesson)

(your friend also finds out about this exchange and mercilessly teases both of you)

170 notes · View notes

heyyyharry · 5 years

Text

My Girl Series: Chapter 5 - Somebody Else

…in which, once upon a time, there was a girl and a boy, and no one else.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 4: Thumper The Rabbit - Harry tries to mend the past, but Y/N wants to let it go.

wattpad link

‘Somebody Else’ bathroom version, you’re welcome

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Those hot summer days had turned the little town called Holmes Chapel into a heated up oven. Everyone would rather stay indoors where there were fans and air-conditioners, yet the two kids Harry and Y/N refused to abandon their treehouse even for a day.

It was a blazing Wednesday afternoon. In the crooked treehouse, the little girl's voice was a lullaby, with the help of soft summer breezes through the branches, sending the 14-year-old into dreamland. With his eyelids fluttering, Harry heard her say, "don't fall asleep."

"I'm not." He tried to open his eyes and look at her.

"Liar." She scoffed. "Is my story boring to you?"

The little girl closed the pink notebook, looking a bit offended as she crossed her arms.

"No," Harry told her as he folded his arms behind his head. "But I want to hear the good stuff, like sword fights or gun battles or something."

"It's only chapter one. I haven't introduced all characters yet."

The boy thought for two seconds before he asked, "I thought there were just the two of them and no one else?"

"Well, it's just a way of saying. They are best friends, so in their eyes they are the only two people in the world." She furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head at him in disappointment.

"Is the girl you?"

She nodded.

"Is the boy me?"

"No, it's a very handsome guy."

"Fine." Harry huffed as he turned his eyes back to the ceiling and told her to carry on. He couldn't see that smile on her face when she resumed reading the story she'd worked so hard on. Even if she'd lied and said it wasn't true, the boy was Harry of course.

Y/N quickly closed the pink notebook on her lap when her phone started to ring. The call was from her best friend Celine, the one Y/N had been expecting to hear from in almost two weeks. Both Celine and Amala had been so busy with their part-time jobs and final exams so Y/N couldn't describe how elated she was to finally receive that phone call.

"Cece, I miss you! How's Boston?"

"Boring as usual. I'm at work right now but I missed you so much. How are you, baby?"

Y/N scanned her eyes around her messy bedroom, at all the papers and clothes lying everywhere on the chair, table, and floor. She was kind of hopeless if she was honest.

"I'm struggling with my work in process. I'm rereading my old stories to find inspiration." She looked at the time and realized she'd been sitting in front of her laptop for an hour now without actually writing anything. Sighing, she went on, "I miss my imagination back then. I used to be so creative."

"Adulthood kills creativity."

"True." She agreed, rolling her eyes. "How's Amala?"

"She's doing great. Maybe we'll video call you tomorrow night. We both missed you lots and lots!" The next thing Celine said was what Y/N had been expecting."Hey, how's it going with the hot photographer?"

"You know." The girl clicked her tongue. "We're just...flirting back and forth."

"Good! Take things slow, but please let yourself have some fun like a normal 20-year-old."

Celine’s advice put a smile on her best friend's face as the girl nodded her head, and soon remembered they were talking on the phone and she couldn't be seen.

"Got it," she said, biting her bottom lip.

"When are you seeing him again?"

"Tonight. He invited me to his exhibition."

"I thought you said he was taking photos for fun."

"That's what I thought! But it turned out he was actually famous, like he shoots for magazine covers and shit. That's so intimidating."

"That's hot! If I weren't gay and taken and your friend, I would eat him up already."

Both girls guffawed at Celine’s remark.

"Shit, I've got to go now! Any more update?"

The first thing that came to Y/N's mind when she heard the word 'update' was actually Harry. She hadn't told her two best friends about them being friends again yet, because those girls had known too much about her history with Harry.

Though a lot had changed in the last two years, she didn't think they wouldn't just believe her friendship with Harry had improved so much just from hearing the words from her mouth. So she decided to keep him as a secret and wait until she saw them in person to break the news. It'd be more convincing if they could see for themselves how much Harry had changed.

"Nope," Y/N lied. "I think I've told you everything, Isaac, my father's engagement..."

As the silence sank in, she heard her best friend exhale. Celine had basically grown up with her and known her father for almost eleven years now, so that news had also shocked the girl a lot. She didn't know the man well to despise him, yet the pain he'd caused to Y/N made it impossible for her to even respect him like she used to.

"I'll call you tomorrow okay?" Celine said, sounding cheerful again all of a sudden, probably to distract her friend from thinking about her father. "Have fun tonight! I'll be refreshing your insta feed!"

"Oh, God!" Y/N tossed her head back, laughing hard. "Bye! Love you!"

"Love you, too!" And just like that, Celine ended the call.

"So I just ran into Daniel Bullard from Vogue Italy. He was obsessed with your works and he told me—"

As his manager kept on rambling about another magazine cover deal, Isaac failed to focus on what this man thought was important. He couldn't stop the words from going into one ear and out from another while scanning his eyes around the crowded room.

He knew this had been his biggest photography exhibition by far, and he was supposed to be excited that there were many big names here tonight. However, he felt so incomplete that the one person he hoped to see most wasn't there.

Harry wasn't there.

He'd told Harry about this exhibition before anyone else, and Harry had never missed a single special event in his life ever since they became friends. So if Harry decided not to show up, Isaac knew it wasn't because he'd forgotten, it was because of Y/N.

"Isey!" The nickname got the photographer to turn his head, and spotted the cheerful Irish man waving at him from across the room.

"Hey, Lee," he interrupted his manager, who was still talking. "I'm gonna go say hi to Niall, if that's alright."

The Asian man sighed as he realized Isaac hadn't heard a single word he'd said. So he just gave up and told his client to do whatever he wanted. "Meanwhile, I'll be over there, praising you to Daniel Bullard."

"Thanks, Lee." Isaac patted the man on the shoulder and headed towards his friend.

They pulled each other into a tight hug because it'd been nearly four months since the last time they saw one another in person.

"You bastard, why didn't you tell me you were back in London?" Isaac asked, one hand on the other guy's shoulder, smiling widely.

"I wanted to surprise you. This exhibition is amazing by the way! You should shoot my next album cover!"

Niall's suggestion made the blond chuckle. "Only if I got half the profit of every single album you sell."

"Hey, I'm your friend!"

"You made Harry and I buy tickets to your concert, you dick," Isaac exclaimed, hands on his hips as both of them cracked up at the good memories with all three of them together.

Harry, Niall and Isaac had been close friends since they shared a dorm room back in university. Now at twenty-four, they had all become famous and got the lives they'd always wanted, living their dreams. The only thing that hadn't changed was their friendship, so Isaac hoped it would just remain this way.

"Speaking of Harold, where's he?" Niall looked around, squinting his blue eyes to search for that familiar curly head. "Where's the other musketeer?"

Isaac shrugged, not knowing what to say but the truth, "maybe he won't even come."

"Why? Did something happen between you two while I was gone?"

"No."

"Fucking liar. I'll ask Harry then." Niall raised an eyebrow, staring at Isaac and waiting for him to say something, but the guy simply gave him a shrug, lips pressed into a faint smile as he let the awkward silence continue. Niall couldn't take it anymore. He lowered his volume to make sure only his friend could hear what he was about to say.

"Don't tell me he's still upset about the Ruby thing."

"Actually, he handled it better than I thought," said Isaac. "But dude, I almost flew to L.A to punch you for sending us that article about Ruby's engagement. He blocked her on social media for a fucking reason."

"Sorry, sorry, I was just really shocked!" Niall held up his hands like a criminal surrendering to a cop. "I just wanted him to know she's a terrible person."

"I think he knows, but whether he believes it or not depends on himself, not you and I." Isaac shook his head.

Niall opened his mouth to say something else, yet got cut off immediately by his friend's notification. Isaac excused himself and took out his phone to read the text, which instantly got him beaming.

⌲ Smiley: I'm outside. Should I just walk in?

He quickly typed back:

⌲ Yes, just tell them your name. You'll see me as soon as you enter. :)

"Niall," said the blond, beaming as he sent that text. "I cannot wait to introduce you to someone."

"Ooh, lemme guess, it's..." Niall paused a bit to think and then shouted out, "Harold!"

Isaac was very confused, at first he thought his friend was joking, but then he heard that all-too-familiar voice from right behind him saying hello. He turned around, and there he found Harry, dressed in a nice suit with his hair pushed back, making his way to them.

The green-eyed man put on a grin as he gave Niall a hug, then Isaac too. He apologized for being late and congratulated his best friend on this exhibition, like their argument the other night about Y/N had never happened. Isaac didn't know how long it would last, but at the moment he couldn't be any happier.

"I'm glad you're here, H," said the blond, who now started to look more like the host of his own event with that elation on his face. Now that the three of them were together again, they could—

"Hey, guys!"

That female voice caused both Isaac and Harry to turn to the main entrance. Two big smiles appeared on both handsome faces as they called out, at the same time,

"Bambi!" / "Smiley!"

Harry looked at Isaac, who looked at Harry, and the men heard Niall mumble "awkward..." under his breath but he wasn't wrong. It was truly awkward for both of them, and maybe for Y/N too.

"Smiley?" Harry furrowed his eyebrows, mouth agape, staring at the girl who shrugged and flashed him a smile. He was hoping the nickname his friend had just shouted out wasn't meant for his Bambi, but as she hugged Isaac and couldn't stop smiling at him, Harry knew it couldn't be anyone else.

Pulling away from Isaac, Y/N turned to Harry and hugged him as well. He didn't know if she noticed, but he held her a bit tighter than he normally would, and when they broke apart, he told her she looked beautiful in the dark blue dress she was wearing.

"Thanks. This thing is two years old already." She looked down and giggled, and for a short second there Harry almost forgot Niall and Isaac were with them.

"Niall, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is—"

"Niall Horan!" Y/N interrupted Isaac, shaking Niall's hand enthusiastically. "I love your music!"

"I like her already." Niall chuckled, eyes on his two best friends. "Which one of you assholes is her boyfriend?"

Both men were left dumbfounded by that one question, but the person who answered it wasn't one of them.

"Neither. We're just friends," Y/N said, red lips curved into a smile, and the satisfaction on Harry's face could not be more obvious.

"So every random person has a nickname for you then?" Niall raised an eyebrow though his attempt to lighten up the mood had his two friends sighing in frustration. "Maybe I should give you a nickname as well."

"Niall, don't even."

"Shut up, Harold, lemme think." Niall held up his hand as he shushed the other brunette.

"In the meantime..." Isaac trailed off, shaking his head at Niall, who was still trying to come up with another nickname for the girl he'd just met. But the photographer never got his chance to finish as his manager Lee appeared out of nowhere and grabbed him by the arm.

"Where's the girl?" Asked the manager, leaving all four people confused.

It took Isaac a second to remember and realize what that meant. So he quickly pointed to Y/N and said that she was the girl.

"Good, good." Lee nodded quickly, holding both Isaac's and Y/N's hand as he laughed. "Blair and Cyrus Archer wanted to see you both."

"The Archers? The twins who shoot for Vanity Fair?" Y/N asked and everyone looked at her in shock, all wondering why she had that knowledge. Shyly, she told them she'd done a bit of research about the industry before she came, so she wouldn't end up looking like a fool.

"Oh, she's smart too! How great!" Lee squealed in excitement as he squeezed her hand. "They are literally obsessed with that shot of you, darling."

"Wait, what shot?" Harry finally spoke up as it seemed like he was the only one there who hadn't seen whatever Lee was talking about. Confused, he quickly followed everyone to another room.

And as soon as he entered, one particular exhibition immediately caught his eyes. It was a portrait of his Bambi. Though the shot was black and white, that beautiful smile on her lovely face was all the colors it needed to radiate joy all across the room.

Harry stood transfixed in shock and disbelief as he heard Y/N whisper to Isaac, "I can't believe you picked that one."

He then replied, "your smile is the brightest in that one."

"Harold?" Niall nudged Harry to pull his friend back down to Earth, but the green-eyed brunette never got his chance to comment on the artwork. Lee jumped right into his mouth, saying he needed to borrow Y/N and Isaac for a moment.

"Sorry boys, networking is key!" said the man as he grabbed the startled pair, pulling them with him towards the twin sisters waiting by the portrait.

Harry couldn't be there much longer. Even though he blamed the overcrowding room for his annoyance, he knew all those people didn't bother him half as much as the happy two standing over there.

"So that's what you two have been hiding from me?" Niall held back Harry's arm as he intended to walk out.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"The girl. Smiley?"

"Bambi." Harry knew Niall made that mistake on purpose to test his reaction, yet he still got irritated, probably because of the nickname alone. "I'll go get a drink, you coming?"

"Then you'll tell me what happened?"

The actor gave his friend a smile, but then brutally killed off Niall's hope with his answer. "In your dreams."

The love song blasting from the loud speaker really got on Harry's nerves, as he looked around at those happy couples dancing and making out with each other. It wasn't even Valentine's Day yet and he'd already felt like the loneliest person in a room.

The after party at Lee's house was massive, and many of the guests were important people in the entertainment industry. Harry swore he knew most of them and they knew him. Still there he was, standing in the corner with a drink in his hand and himself as his own company, like a geek at senior prom.

Across the room, Niall was flirting with a girl Harry had never met before. Isaac and Y/N were nowhere to be seen, and Harry didn't want to guess what they could be doing right now. As if seeing them together wasn't awful enough.

The actor quickly emptied the glass in his hand and laid it down on the table by his side. Fuck, he thought, I really need another drink.

"Well, isn't this the famous Harry Styles?!"

Harry could've broken his neck from turning his head so fast to the sound of that voice.

There she was, his Bambi, walking towards him with a cheeky smile and asked him why he wasn't dancing like everyone else. He told her half the truth, that he wasn't in the mood to party at the moment without telling her why.

Surprisingly, she didn't ask, and just tugged on his arm as she said, "come dance with me."

It wasn't a question, more like a request, one he couldn't deny. So he let her pull him along to the center of the room to join the dancing crowd, thinking about how they used to dance with each other when they were kids; but of course, with them being adults a lot would have changed already.

Under the flashing red and blue lights, Harry couldn't take his eyes of the young woman in front of him. She was swaying to the rhythm of the upbeat song without caring who might be watching her. Her energy fueled him to also let himself loose.

She grabbed his shoulders, pulling him in, their foreheads resting against each other as he finally found the courage to place his hands on her lower back. If anyone was watching them now, they might think they were in love.

"You dance like a grandpa," she teased, raising her voice so he could hear her over the loud music. Harry couldn't help but laugh at her comment.

"Thanks, that's why I act and not dance."

She rolled her eyes playfully, shaking her head as she cracked up.

"Where's Isaac?" He finally asked.

"Oh, he's talking to some people Lee introduced him to."

"Why did he call you Smiley?" The second question had no relation to the previous one, yet Harry couldn't keep second guessing anymore. He assumed the nickname had something to do with the shot of her smiling, but the answer Y/N gave him was beyond his prediction.

"He called me that to remind me to always smile."

Harry nearly lost his balance on his own two feet when he heard those words. Sure Y/N had never been his to begin with, but at that moment, he realized he was losing her.

"Let's be honest, Bambi is a better name." He scoffed and received another smile from the girl.

"Don't you worry," she told him. "I'll always be Bambi."

Though that seemed far from the truth, it was what Harry chose to believe.

"I can't believe the last time we danced together you still had pigtails," he said, beaming at her as he ran his hands through her hair.

"The last time we danced together I still had a crush on you." That response was beyond his prediction but the next thing coming from her mouth put him up short.

"Don't worry, I'm over it."

Harry stopped dancing and so did she, not because she could read his mind, but because she spotted Isaac heading towards them. Harry turned his head just in time his best friend arrived and asked to steal Y/N for a moment.

"Sure. She's all yours," Harry said. Those words had been the hardest to say by far. "I'll see you later, Bambi."

Without waiting for her to reply, he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek to say goodbye. And not until he was walking away from them did Harry realize, he had never kissed her on the cheek before.

It was rather embarrassing to even try to guess her reaction as he headed straight to the bathroom, and he didn't even need to go. He just wanted a place to get away from all those background noises and human interactions, even though those things kept him free from the crazy thoughts inside his head.

The muffled music from outside had changed to Somebody Else by The 1975. And as he washed his hands in the sink, Harry cursed the one who'd made that playlist. Were they trying to narrate his situation at the moment?

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else

He needed to get out of there.

"Lee, have you seen Isaac and Y/N?"

The manager excused himself to the guests as he turned to Harry. "They just left together, he told me he was gonna take her home."

Harry thanked Lee, ignoring what the man had to say next and just walked away, pushing his way through the packed room to find the exit. Now that they were both gone he had no reason to be there anymore.

He was just a few steps away from the door when a familiar figure caught his eyes, and for a second there he thought that girl he saw was his Bambi. From behind she surely looked like Y/N, but she was wearing a different outfit.

The girl turned around, sending Harry a smile as soon as she caught him staring. What happened next was very hazy in his memory probably because the alcohol had finally kicked in.

He vaguely remembered approaching the girl and asking her to dance. He remembered them drinking until his head was spinning in circles. He remembered kissing her on the mouth as they called a taxi to go to his place. He remembered taking off her clothes as well as his own. He remembered having sex. But most importantly, he remembered thinking of Y/N the entire time.

And when he crashed down on the bed, sweaty, all out of breath, Harry remembered the feeling of disappointment. The girl said a lot of things to him, yet his ears automatically canceled out all the other sounds apart from his own heartbeats.

As he drifted off, the face of Y/N from earlier as she pulled him close continued to haunt him still.

Y/N giggled as she ran up the stairs with Isaac following right behind her. The lift in the building broke again, so they had to walk five floors to get to her flat, and Y/N would've been so embarrassed if Isaac hadn't already known she was too broke to afford better accommodation.

"Don't be too shocked when you see my room."

"I've been in your room before, love," he said, catching his breath as he took the last step to reach her and gave her a tired smile.

The last time he'd been there was actually on the day they first met. After hanging out together from morning till night, he dropped her off at her place and she invited him in for a cup of tea. That was how they woke up the next morning with him spooning her in her bed, fully clothed of course.

"You were lucky the last time because I'd just cleaned it. I haven't done it again since." She chuckled, pulling out her keys as she opened the door. Then the girl was completely frozen in her spot.

Isaac looked around the tiny living room, it wasn't that bad so he didn't get the shocked expression on her face. It was only when she bent down to pick up a white envelope someone had probably slid through her door gap that he realized the real reason she'd reacted that way.

"Is that a wedding invita—Hey!" He shouted out, reaching for her hands but it was already too late. She'd already torn the envelope to pieces and marched across the room to toss them all in the trash bin. She looked at him, he looked at her, neither said another word, both second-guessing each other's next move.

She knew he wanted to ask her why, but he wasn't sure if what he was wondering would be invasive, so he stayed quiet. Anyway, she was glad he had chosen not to question what she'd done.

"Tea?" She asked with a smile.

"Y/N!"

The way Isaac shouted out her name caused the girl to bat her eyelashes and she finally made it out of her maze of thoughts. The cup of tea she’d made for him had been emptied whereas the one in her hand was still full and had gotten cold.

"What's wrong?" He asked in concern. "You kind of spaced out."

"Nothing. I'm just tired."

Isaac checked the time on his watch and furrowed his eyebrows as he realized how late it'd been.

"I should leave so you can rest."

"Wait!" She stopped him. "We can...We can talk some more...I'm not that tired."

Her reaction made the man laugh as he nodded and shifted a bit to get back to his previous comfortable posture. He looked around the room, at the books and many crumpled up pieces of paper lying all over the floor and on the table between them. It looked like the aftermath of a tornado inside her living room but he didn't have to raise questions for her to give him the answer.

"I'm struggling with my writing."

"Yeah, I figured." He chuckled. "You told me about the book you'd been working on."

"I haven't even edited the first chapter." She rolled her eyes. "But it sucks anyway, so..."

"Can I read it?"

"What?"

"Your first chapter."

"Oh...that...well..." The girl straightened her back, flipping her hair over her shoulders in a nervous manner as she cleared her throat. "I'm sorry but I've never shared my unfinished work with anyone besides my mum and..."

"Harry," Isaac finished the sentence for her, leaving her surprised for a second.

"Yeah." She nodded. "But when it's ready...if it's ready, I'll let you read it."

"I can't wait."

The gentle smile he was giving her had her sitting there with her heart in her mouth. Her anticipation told her he was gonna say something else, so she quickly stole his chance to speak by blurting out, "do you wanna stay tonight?"

"S-Sure." He chuckled, slightly taken aback yet also amused. "If you want me to."

"I want you to," she asserted.

"Okay. Then I'll stay."

Harry woke up in the middle of the night and found himself in his bed with a naked stranger lying by his side. She had her back turned to him so for a split second he imagined it was Y/N though he knew for sure it was not. Y/N's hair smelt like freshly picked apples, not lavender, and she had a little scar on her left shoulder from crashing her bike into a tree when she was eleven. Harry didn't know why he remembered that, but he did. And now he couldn't go back to sleep anymore.

He propped up on his elbows, reaching for his phone on the nightstand to check what time it was. It was almost half past two in the morning. The worst time of the day to be awake. Usually, at this hour, his thoughts would go out of control and he would always end up doing things that he would regret in the morning, like what he was going to do next.

He searched for Y/N's number despite knowing to call her up this late would be cruel, if she had class early in the morning and needed her full eight-hour sleep. However, he missed her too much and desperately wanted to hear her voice. He had no idea what had gotten into him and why he was so needy for her attention. She was his little Bambi. But he seemed to have forgotten that already ever since he got jealous over her relationship, or whatever it was between her and his best friend.

He quietly left the bedroom and made that impulsive move to dial Y/N's number, biting his nails as the beeping on the line continued for what seemed like forever.

But it wasn't Y/N who picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"I-Isaac?" Harry nearly choked when he heard the voice, still he prayed she'd left her phone in Isaac's car or something. Something. Anything. Let it not be what he had in mind. "Is Y/N there?"

"Yeah, she's sleeping. She told me to pick up the phone."

Harry heard noises in the background like someone shifting between the sheets. And he had the squeezed his eyes shut to fight the thought that his worst fear had come true.

"Who's that?" Her sleepy voice was faint but he could tell it was her talking to Isaac.

"It's Harry."

"Great...You talk to Harry, I'm gonna sleep..."

"Mate, she just...dozed off again." Isaac's chuckle drove Harry insane. "Is it urgent?"

"No...uhm...Her dad just asked me to check on her. It's fine." That awful lie was followed by the worst laugh Harry had ever faked, but Isaac couldn't recognize that over the phone so he sounded so indifferent when saying goodnight and goodbye to his best friend.

Harry's heart died down as soon as the call ended. He dropped his arms down to his sides and leaned against the wall behind him, looking defeated. He stood there, pondering for about five minutes before deciding to head back to bed and trying to get some sleep before sunrise.

The girl who looked like Y/N was still sleeping. He kind of envied her now because he couldn't fall back to sleep, so he just closed his eyes and tried to think about anything but the previous phone call.

As he dug through the memory box in the small dusty corner of his mind, Harry found himself going back to that hot summer afternoon in the treehouse and he could hear her voice reading aloud the story in her pink notebook.

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Harry didn't know how that story ended because Y/N had never finished it, or at least never revealed the ending to him. But how wonderful could it have been, if that was the last sentence of the story instead of the first? Now, he could no longer return to the world where there was no one else besides them two.

#my girl series #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles writing #harry styles series #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #bestfriend!harry #older!harry #younger!y/n #actor!harry

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tommybaholland · 5 years

Text

Working Hard Or Hardly Working? | tom holland x reader

(beefcake bby image is not mine)

Summary: the one where you’re struggling with working on your body, but tom isn’t far behind

Word Count: 2.5K

Warnings: body image issues, swearing, the fluffiest shit ive written in a min

———————————

“3, 2, 1 REST…”

“Next up, spiderman plank!”

You groaned as the automated voice instructed you to assume the position. And yet, you proceeded to push through the exercise in hopes that one day, it would be easier. But for right now, you sigh and grunt through every tense muscle and that ache in your lower back.

Tom watched you from a few feet away as he was doing a cooldown run on the treadmill. He has to admit, he was a bit amused with your frustration at the gym. You both used to exercise together, but lately you’ve been preoccupied with this app that tells you what to do, and you do it. You had gotten a head start getting back to the gym after the premiere of Far From Home and downloaded it to help give you direction on what to do for what you wanted to work on. And for you, it was probably the best thing you did.

Also the fact that Tom is one of the most competitive people you’ve ever met.

That didn’t bother you, usually.

But he couldn’t help but notice your attitude at the gym has changed since the press tour ended. You’d been wanting to do your own routine more often, only offering to warm-up and sometimes cooldown routines with Tom. So he allowed you to do your own thing, and would on occasion tease you with,

“S’okay babe, you probably wouldn’t be able to handle my routine anyway,” while flexing his muscles, which you knew has become thicker and more defined since before Far From Home had begun shooting.

He honestly couldn’t complain though, watching you and that ass throw down some squats had never been better.

Other than you doing your own thing at the gym, you also seemed more aggressive with the workouts. When you and Tom first came to the gym together, you would just do some cardio on the elliptical or the treadmill and then finish with some yoga. But now you seem more committed and will do HIIT routine after routine and even lift weights some days as well.

He had also noticed your eating habits had changed drastically as well. He couldn’t remember the last time you had both eaten the same meal. In fact, he couldn’t even remember the last time you had eaten, in general. You just didn’t seem to want to enjoy the usual things you and him would indulge in lately. He minded wandered to last night, when you turned down a legendary pastime you and him would take part in from time to time.

“What kind of pizza should we order?”

“Oh, uh, I’m actually not that hungry.”

“What?” Tom questioned in disbelief. “You’re still drinking though, right?”

You shook your head. “No, sorry. I think I’m going to just have water.”

“You’re kidding, right? You love our beer and pizza nights,” Tom replied, in disbelief.

“You can still order it and we can still watch something!” You reiterated. “I’m just––taking a break from pizza and beer.”

Something seemed off to him. Normally, he just brushed it off, thinking that you missed being active and wanted to catch up. But your mood and behavior didn’t seem right to him.

Frankly, you didn’t look very happy.

You had finished your last exercise, and were left panting and dripping with sweat. You took a sip of water before getting a disinfectant wipe to wipe down your yoga mat. Tom stepped off the treadmill as you finished cleaning your mat, calling over to you.

“Ready to go soon, love?”

You nodded, still trying to catch your breath. Your heart was racing, and your muscles felt thoroughly worked, despite that you skipped some exercises or took more breaks during the hard ones.

As Tom was putting away some of the free weights he has used, you decided to weigh yourself on the scale in the gym. You took a deep breath before stepping on the scale, something you always did, calling it the “moment of truth.”

Standing up straight and sucking everything in, you looked down at the numbers to see your fate.

No change.

It wasn’t the worst thing in the world. You didn’t gain weight, but nothing had been lost either. You sighed, rubbing over your face and through your sweaty hair before stepping off and putting your shoes back on.

Grabbing your stuff, Tom rejoined you at the front of the gym, wrapping an arm around your shoulders to pull you into his side, placing a small kiss on your temple.

He quickly pulled his hand off of your arm, rubbing the excess moisture onto his shirt.

“You’re quite sweaty,” he chuckled. “A bit smelly, too.”

You gave him a small chuckle and smile, humoring him. But it wasn’t as big of a reaction as he normally would get from you.

The ride home was silent between the two of you. Tom posted on his insta story for the thousandth time about Far From Home while you sat in the seat adjacent to him, dealing with your own business.

Leaning your cheek on your hand that was propped up on the window by your elbow, you looked at the graph that the app had created with all the data points you had entered for your weight.

You tried to weigh yourself everyday, or almost every day, once reading somewhere that people who weigh themselves regularly have more motivation and therefore, lose more weight. You’d been committing yourself to working out everyday and trying to make healthier choices for about a month now and you would’ve thought you’d see a small difference in the numbers.

But the graph didn’t show that.

The trend was an absolute mess, with hills and plateaus everywhere. It was disappointing and frustrating to you. And it wasn’t just about looking good,

It was about feeling healthier about yourself.

It almost made you feel like you weren’t allowed to have that. Tom worked hard and trained enough to make his body “Spider-Man ready” but he was also naturally athletic. His body was practically made to look like that.

You, however, are soft and round with some strong build. It was just extremely hard to get that build to show.

Upon arriving back to Tom’s apartment, he went straight to the kitchen to make his usual post-workout protein shake, turning to you as you put your water bottle down on the counter.

“You want one, darling?”

“Uh, no thanks. I think I’m gonna go shower,” You could feel the redness still on your cheeks. “I feel gross.”

And it wasn’t just from the sweat.

Tom nodded, giving you a small smile before you turned and went into his room to grab a change of clothes before walking down the hall to the bathroom to shower.

Tom could sense that you wanted to be alone, deciding that he shouldn’t join you in the shower like he normally would do.

You took your sweet time getting clean, mainly focusing on how your body didn’t feel much different as you rubbed body wash over your skin.

One thing that you and Tom had in common was you both liked the idea of a challenge and would persevere through anything that stretched beyond your normal abilities. That’s why he loved being Spider-Man. He gets to show people what he can really do, even if it takes time, or 40 takes, to get there.

You’re the exact same way. You never really like repeating the same thing over and over again with work and want to show off your capabilities. Normally you would see this as a challenge and keep trying to see it through to your goal.

But lately just the thought of perseverance has been the real challenge.

You wanna just say ‘fuck it’. Some days, you just want to go to the gym and spend time with your boyfriend without being distracted by some app telling you what to do. Some days, you wanna eat all the pizza and drink all the beer you want while watching stupid late night movies with Tom.

Some days, you just want to give up.

And that’s how you’re feeling right now.

You knew Tom was catching on to your behavior, especially with eating. You felt ashamed when you had to decline the traditional things you would eat together and drag his spirits down with you. You had to admit, sometimes you would become jealous that he could eat whatever he wanted, and burn it off quickly without a change in his sculpted body.

It didn’t seem fair to you.

Getting out of the shower, feeling cleaner, you decided to hop on the scale one last time, completely naked. After taking your habitual ‘moment of truth’ deep breath, you stepped on and the result was the same.

“Fuck,” you swore under your breath. It was true.

You stepped off and proceeded to dress yourself with anger, not wanting to dry your hair.

Exiting the bathroom, you passed Tom, who was still in the kitchen, and walked over to the sectional couch where you took your usual corner spot. Tom eventually bumbled over, holding two glasses of a brown, thick liquid.

“I made you one anyway,” he voiced, handing you the fuller glass before sitting down next to you, his knees tucked up and turned towards you. “I figured you hadn’t eaten yet.”

Ugh, why did he have to be so good?

You returned a quiet ‘thanks’ as you accepted the glass. You didn’t take a sip but just stared down into it, the smell making your stomach yearn for a taste.

“It’s chocolate,” Tom pointed out, beaming with pride. “Your favorite.”

“....What time is it?” You asked in response.

“It’s,” Tom paused, checking his phone for the time. “10:10. Why?”

“I-I can’t eat until 11,” you remarked softly.

Tom’s expression contorted into confusion. “Well, that’s the point, babe,” he chuckled. “It’s a protein shake, you’re not eating it.”

You could hear the smile in his voice, wanting to roll your eyes playfully or do something that showed him you were amused. But you just kept your head down, letting out another sigh.

Tom’s tone changed as he saw you were serious and continued to not drink it.

“Aw, c’mon, love, please drink it. Can’t remember when you last had something to eat. And I know I would be starving after what you did at the gym today”

You hated making him feel responsible for your health. You knew you needed to eat, but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him the whole truth.

“I just….want to feel fuller throughout the day,” you explained.

Tom nodded, shifting his own gaze down to his fingers, which were tapping the glass of his cup. He suddenly put his glass down on the coffee table in front of you, before moving closer next to you, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Y/N….why can’t you eat until 11?” He asked earnestly.

You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes. That was like the equivalent of stressful things building up and you break down once someone asks ‘you okay?.’ You turned your face away from him for a second, trying to gather the words.

“I….don’t w-wanna gain weight and then regret everything tomorrow after I work my ass off at the gym and then don’t see the results,” you spat, the first tear beginning to fall.

“Aw, love,” Tom consoled, taking your glass from your hands to place it next to his on the table before moving slightly behind you so he could pull you into his arms, his chin resting on top of your head.

“What’s all this about? You know I think you’re beautiful,” he reminded you.

You sniffled, wiping your face before pulling away from him. “That’s the thing, Tom.”

“This isn’t about you. I mean, I want to look good for you but that’s not why a-and not to sound vain but...I know I’m pretty,” You rambled out, making yourself chuckle a bit.

He chuckled with you, reaching up to wipe away a tear, pushing a piece of your hair behind your ears before letting you continue.

“I know how you feel about me...and I’m glad you remind me but I just,” you paused for a moment, shifting your eyes from eyes, trying to find how to say it exactly.

“I just want to feel healthier,” you finally get out.

“I haven’t felt that way in….a while,” you admitted. “Especially when the movie premiered, I could just...feel myself going over the edge.”

More tears came to surface, you took a moment to breathe through them.

“And my body just isn’t like yours, I gain weight so easily! And working out everyday isn’t enough; I have to practically not eat anything to see any change in the numbers...right now I’ve been fluctuating back and forth...I just can’t seem to get out of this spot..I-I just,”

You broke down at that point, leaning back into his body as he comforted you, pulling you into his lap.

“It’s okay, baby. You’ve just worried me, ‘s all,” he admitted.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Didn’t mean to make you worry,” you apologized as your tears subsided, resting your head on his shoulder. “But I’m putting in more effort than I can give and it leaves me exhausted everyday. I’m just….frustrated.”

“I’m sorry you’re having a rough time, love. It is hard,” Tom agrees. “But just remember that you’re your own toughest critic and I know you’re strong enough to overcome that. I, for one, think you look sexy as fuck,” he voiced, a hand squeezing your hip.

You chuckle a bit, sensing a similar situation. “I could say the same for you.”

“What do you mean?” Tom questions with a smirk.

You sit up again, leaning back into the cushion of the couch with his arm still around you.

“You’ve just openly talked about how you thought you looked better in the last Spider-Man than in this one so,” you shrugged.

Tom scoffs a laugh. “Yeah, but, that was different. I still look good, I just thought I looked better in Homecoming,” he clarifies.

“Okay, well, I, for one, think you look sexy as fuck anytime,” you emphasized, throwing his words back at him, while squeezing his thick bicep.

Tom tipped his head back, laughing before wrapping you in his arms again to squish you into a hug. Pulling away, he kissed your lips quickly before pulling away slightly, his nose brushing yours.

“Well, my point is, we can figure out what you need together. I’m glad that you’re trying to help improve on yourself but just know that I’m here to support you all the way.”

“Thanks, Tommy,” you giggled before placing your lips on his again, your hand going to the back of his neck while his pulled your waist closer.

“Starting with,” he spoke against your lips before pulling away and reaching over.

“Chugging this,” He held the drink he made for you in front of you, prompting you to finally drink it.

“Are you serious?” You laughed, raising your brows.

“YESSSSS,” he replied, singing loudly. “You’re gonna have to drink it if you wanna build that muscle,” he pointed out, squeezing your bicep, which had a little more loose skin on it than his did.

You sighed dramatically, taking the glass from his hands, looking down at the thick, brown liquid again.

“Weeeeeee like to drink with Y/N because Y/N is our mate—” Tom started sing-yelling again, this time belting out one of your infamous drinking songs.

“—Okay, okay” you shushed him, covering your hand over his mouth to silence him. “But if I puke, you’re gonna regret it.”

“And she gets it down in 8, 7, 6…”

Bitch.

A/N: im back bitcH. heres a lil surprise for everyone, i know its not GRIND but i want to thank everyone for being so patient with me while i was away! i wanted to start with something a lil smaller before i get back into GRIND but i have been writing for it and it’s coming, i promise. i thought of this idea this morning and wrote it today (fastest i’ve written in a while) and this ones pretty personal for me rn bc i have been struggling with trying to take care of my health and i thought it tied in well with toms comment about his physique in ffh. anyway, be patient with yourself and consistency will take care of you!!

xx. tommybaholland 🌺

i haven’t written in a minute pls tell me ur thoughts!

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carmenlire · 5 years

Note

I just had the best thought ever, prepare yourself. Malec human au where Alec's friends & family know he's dating some guy but only his bff Clary (Yes theyre gay besties) knows it's Magnus. Then, one day, they get engaged & Magnus posts an obligatory "he said yes!!" pic & tags Alec, Izzy follows Magnus on insta (maybe he has a following? maybe because of his job? maybe she just follows him because of mutual friends? maybe they're friends?? who knows) & sees the post & is like Alec,,,,, explain??

This was super fun, Julia, and I hope you like this!!!

read on ao3

Alec answers a text message as he sits down, only to look up when Clary snorts.

“You’re so smitten,” she teases, taking a drink of her bubble tea.

“Shut up,” Alec huffs. He turns his phone so that the screen faces down as he gives his friend his total attention.

Clary had been a total pain in his ass at first when they’d met in college. Taking pottery as an elective to fulfill his fine art credit, Alec had gotten to class early enough to have his pick of seats. Of course, he’d taken an empty table only for a bright-haired whirlwind to come crashing into the seat next to him just before class started.

She’d introduced herself cheerily and while Alec knows his own expression had probably been closer to a pained grimace, Clary had been unfazed. As things would go, they were assigned partners for the semester and after four months Alec had a fervent desire to never even see a pottery wheel again and a reluctantly good friend.

Sighing as Clary just stares at him with an expectant look, Alec dryly wonders that he shouldn’t be surprised. In their early days, the two had bonded over talking about relationships. As luck would have it, Clary had ran into Isabelle during an art exhibition a few weeks after they’d met and Alec hasn’t known peace since.

“What, Fray.”

Alec’s tone isn’t what anyone would call welcoming but Clary doesn’t let that stop her as she perks up. She raises a brow, mouth upturned.

“When are you going to tell everyone? It’s been what, over a year?”

“Almost two,” Alec mutters and jerks away when Clary reaches over and slaps his shoulder.

“Alec,” she exclaims. “You’ve been dating Magnus for two years and you still haven’t told your family? How the hell have you managed that? Why would you want to do that? You know Izzy thinks you’re dating, like, a CIA agent or something, right? For God’s sake, you two live together.”

Wincing, Alec shrugs defensively. “Magnus is gone a lot for shooting. Do you know how hard it is to explain his absences without making him sound like a black ops spy?” Running a hand through his hair, he goes on to mutter, “It just sorta happened? Magnus wanted to keep things quiet for awhile to stay out of the press and then it just snowballed from there.”

“Surely you could trust Izzy and Jace, though.” Clary’s tone is incredulous and Alec doesn’t blame her. Whenever he stops to think about it, it does seem inordinately ridiculous that he’s been in a relationship without his siblings catching wind of the guy.

“I was exciting at first, you know that. Sneaking around, annoying Jace and Iz by refusing to say anything, especially since I know that Izzy’s halfway in love with him herself. But then it just got to the point where I didn’t know how to tell them. The timing never seemed right.”

Clary laughs softly. “What, tell them that their brother is dating Magnus Bane, two time Academy Award winner? Yeah, I’m sure that’d go over smoothly.”

“I can hear Izzy’s screams now,” Alec says grimly before sighing deeply. He flips his gaze up to meet Clary’s eyes. “I’m halfway surprised you haven’t told her.”

Sniffing delicately, Clary just offers, “I am capable of keeping secrets, you know. After we ran into Magnus that first time, when he called me that night and demanded pretty boy’s phone number, I didn’t know if anything would come out of it. Magnus is a pretty private kinda guy when he’s not working.” She snorts. “And then, like you said, things snowballed. You two started dating– and were dating for months before I even realized– and by then, I didn’t think it was my place. She’s your sister,” she accuses with a glare.

Alec just huffs out a breath, beleaguered. “Yeah, trust me, I know.”

Leaning over the table, Clary’s tone drops to something encouraging and a little beseeching. “All I‘m saying is that this will bite you in the ass if you don’t tell everyone.”

“Know something I don’t, Fray?” Alec asks with a raised brow before glaring at her when she does nothing but smile.

The conversation moves on swiftly from there. While the two of them regularly hang out, the schedules have been so busy lately that it feels like ages since they last stopped for coffee and chatted until the sun started drooping in the sky.

Still, as Alec enjoys a rare afternoon out of the courtroom, he can’t help but wonder what the hell Clary was being so cryptic about.

Alec wakes to the feel of lips against his spine. Smiling into his pillow, he relaxes deeper into the mattress as he feels Magnus trace invisible lines along his back with a wandering hand before chasing a string of kisses across his shoulders.

“Morning, babe,” he finally manages to get out, voice hoarse with residual sleep.

Pausing in his ministrations, Magnus leans over him further until Alec shivers at the breath against his ear.

“Good morning, fiance.” The words are immediately followed by a lingering kiss just under his hear that’s more of a nuzzle against warm skin.

Alec can’t stop the grin that lights up his face and he doesn’t try to as he shifts until he’s on his back with Magnus looming over him. The morning sunlight streams through their gauzy curtains and paints them both in burnished shades of gold.

“That does have a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

Humming, Magnus nods emphatically. “Oh, darling, you have no idea. How are you feeling this morning?”

Alec’s voice is traitorously soft as he brings a hand up and combs it through Magnus’s wild bedhead. His boyfriend– fiance– looks ridiculous and perfect and like everything he’s ever dreamed of. “Like the luckiest man in the world,” he replies and he watches Magnus’s mouth tip up in a faint but glowing smile.

Leaning down, Magnus catches Alec’s lips in a kiss that’s warm if not heated. Time spins out for long minutes, the two of them enjoying each other and this perfectly ordinary– yet special all the same– morning.

It’s a couple of hours later, after they’ve finished breakfast, when Magnus gets that gleam in his eye that Alec would know anywhere.

Laughing a little, he asks, “What’s going on in that head of yours? You have something up your sleeve.”

Resting his chin in his hand, Magnus gazes across the table at him, eyes moving between the engagement ring on Alec’s hand up to his face. “Can I paint your nails?”

Surprised, Alec blinks. “Why,” he asks, bemused. “It’s been months since you painted my nails.”

“Well,” Magnus drawls out, reaching for Alec’s hand and tangling their fingers together. “That ring looks lovely on you, if I do say so myself– and I should know since I bought the damn thing– and what better way to set it off than with a little polish?”

Alec brings their joined hands up to his mouth, placing a quick kiss right below Magnus’s knuckles. “Yeah, okay then,” he agrees easily. “Did you have a color in mind?”

Grinning widely, Magnus just winks at him. “Oh, Alexander, how could you even ask me that.”

He’s just finishing the last nail’s clear topcoat when he looks up at Alec.

Alec, who’d been smiling as he watched his fiance work– Magnus was always so cute when he concentrated– shakes his head a little as he sees the faint line between Magnus’s brows deepen.

“Hey,” he says softly. “What’s up?”

Straightening from where he’d been leaning over Alec’s nails, Magnus frowns a little and looks uncertain. That’s an expression that rarely comes across his face and Alec studies him, a little worried.

“I was just thinking,” Magnus starts, “That if we’re getting married then we’ll probably have to come clean, don’t you think? Really, we probably should’ve made an announcement awhile ago but I do so enjoy having you all to myself.”

Magnus’s voice lowers on the last few words and Alec finds himself smiling even as heat sweeps up his spine.

Careful with his still tacky polish, Alec grabs Magnus’s chin, urging him closer for a soft kiss. “Whenever you want,” he agrees easily as he pulls back. “I respect your job and you not wanting us to become fodder for the media. I know I can handle things, though, if you think you’re ready.”

He rolls his eyes. “And I mean, come on. Everyone knows that Magnus Bane is off the market. They just don’t know who.”

“Fair enough.” Magnus laughs a little before he looks down and studies Alec’s hands, now painted with a dark blue polish with the faintest hint of shimmer.

Alec watches his love take a deep breath before his gaze flips back up and meets his. “So we’re doing this?”

“We’re doing this,” Alec repeats, voice firm. “How do you wanna play it?”

Magnus’s eyes go from his phone on the table to Alec’s hands– back and forth a few times and Alec can pinpoint the moment he gets an idea.

“I’ll have to invite Jace and Izzy to brunch tomorrow and tell them the good news,“ Alec says, picking up on Magnus’s train of thought. "I don’t want them hearing it from anyone else.”

“Whatever you say, darling,” Magnus agrees absently as he reaches for his phone and starts shifting Alec’s hand how he wants it. “I can meet you depending on the time. I do have that interview tomorrow afternoon in Midtown.”

Alec makes a faint noise of acknowledgement as he grins down at his ring, his stupidly perfect ring that Magnus had surprised him with last night.

It’s a bold move but right now, in this moment, Alec feels like he could shout his love from the rooftops. It’s unforgivable drivel but it’s true and he’s excited to finally proclaim Magnus as his and, by the looks of things, his forever.

“Okay, hermano, you told us to be at Taki’s bright and early. Here we are, I’ve eaten two plates of appetizers, and you have yet to tell us what’s so important that you dragged me from my Sunday morning ritual with Clary. Spill.”

Alec takes a bracing drink of his coffee as he looks between Izzy and Jace. Clary’s next to Isabelle trying valiantly to swallow her smile, though Alec sees the discreet thumbs up she throws his way.

He clears his throat. While one arm rests on the table as he fiddles with his coffee mug, the other hand is under the table and he tries to calm his nerves by playing with his ring, spinning it slowly to ease the vise that’s clamped down on his throat.

He’s not worried about his family’s reactions. They’ve heard him gush about his boyfriend enough to know that he’s a good man and that he makes Alec happy. Still, Magnus is famous and Alec’s kept this under wraps for a surprisingly long time.

Distantly, he has a moment to wonder that the timing just never fucking fits.

As he starts thinking about what to say– and yeah, he did practice but Alec’s never been good at remembering speeches when they’re not in front of a judge– he’s vaguely aware of Isabelle studying his nails. He catches the smile that spreads across her face before her expression turns thoughtful, her eyes narrowing.

Alec’s just opened his mouth when Isabelle speaks over him.

“Oh my God,” she exclaims, eyes widening but laser focused on his hands. “Oh my God, Alec.”

Her mouth is hanging open and Jace is staring at her like she’s lost her damned mind as Alec deflates and Clary stifles the giggles that he just knows she’s hiding behind her hand.

Isabelle stands up from the table abruptly, her chair scraping the floor loud in the cacophonous din of the morning crowd.

Pointing a sharp finger at him, Izzy demands, “Show me your other hand, Alec.”

Sighing, Alec obeys and climbs to his feet. He holds out his left hand in front of Izzy and watches as she gasps before immediately reaching for him, thumb brushing over his ring.

“I ought to kill you,” she mutters, sounding dazed. Her eyes are glued to his hand before she lifts her head with, what looks like, herculean effort. “Explain everything.”

Alec winces as he sits back down, playing with his ring blatantly now. His sister’s voice had been sugary sweet as she spoke through clenched teeth.

He swallows hard. Before he can say anything, though, Jace is talking.

“What the hell’s going on,” he asks, confused. “You got engaged– I’d have to be blind not to see that engagement ring– but why is Iz about to murder you and everyone you’ve ever cared about?”

“Because,” Isabelle grits out, "He’s engaged to Magnus fucking Bane, movie star and fashion icon.”

At that, Jace does a double take. “Wait– what.”

“Yeah, about that,” Alec says, clearing his throat. He looks at Izzy. “How did you know?”

“I saw your hands. They were familiar but it took me awhile to place where I’d seen that color lately. Wouldn’t you know, I saw it on Instagram yesterday. It was a post by Magnus of a hand with that color polish and a ring and the caption He said yes. It’s all anyone can talk about, the prospect of Magnus taking his relationship public. If only I knew that my brother’s boyfriend– who I thought was some sort of super top secret spy– was the man in question.”

Running a hand through his hair, Alec leans back in his seat, deflating. “I should’ve known you’d check Instagram before brunch.”

He doesn’t get to say anything else before there’s a whirlwind heading toward them. Magnus drops a quick kiss on top of Alec’s head before plopping down in the chair next to him. He’s grinning and Alec’s the only one who sees the nerves that are lighting him up from the inside.

Without thinking, he reaches over and takes Magnus’s hand, sweeping a thumb over his to steady his fiance. Magnus squeezes his hand, throwing him a look of thanks, before turning toward the table.

“Hello, I’m Magnus and I’m Alexander’s–”

“Fiance.” Isabelle says the word with Magnus and the table sits in stunned silence for a minute.

Jace is the first one to rally.

He holds out a hand for Magnus to shake before tilting his head in Alec’s direction. “We heard you proposed to Alec last night. Congratulations but I just have one question.” He pauses for a brief moment and the glint in his eye has Alec wanting to preemptively sink to the floor. “Are you sure you want to tie yourself forever to a guy that has the social life of a ninety year old great-grandmother?”

Alec doesn’t have time to take offence, to offer a sharp rebuttal, before Magnus is responding.

His fiance– the love of his life, the very beat of his heart– just winks at Jace, settling in his seat as he reaches for Alec’s coffee with his free hand.

“You know,” he starts, and Alec rolls his eyes at Magnus’s thoughtful, facetious tone. “I daresay the grandmother would be more lively than Alec– especially when he’s on a case. Have you ever played cards with him? He’d be kicked out of bridge club before he could be offered a hard candy.”

Jace barks out a laugh and it breaks the tension. Alec joins in even if it’s at his expense and feels relief that everything really will work out alright. He’ll have to answer a million and one questions from Izzy and he’s already bracing himself for Jace’s ribbing but as he introduces Magnus to his family and finally sees one of his most anticipated daydreams play out, Alec’s comfortable and happy and so full of joy that he barely knows what to do with himself.

Brunch is a splendid success and becomes a sort of tradition for the Lightwood siblings and their significant others. Isabelle forgives him after bleeding every single detail out of him and he breathes a quiet sigh of relief when her ire turns toward Clary.

Later that evening, when Alec sees a picture of him and Magnus splashed across the front of TMZ, he chuckles and thinks, This is it.

"Hey babe,” he calls out from where he’s laying in bed, scrolling aimlessly on his phone.

“Yes, darling?” Magnus’s voice echoes from the bathroom where he’s taking his makeup up and going through his night time routine.

“It looks like our secret’s out. People saw us walking today and know who I am.”

Stepping into the bedroom, Magnus studies Alec for a minute before smiling and coming over to his side of the bed. He looks down at him softly before combing a hand through his hair.

“Don’t you know, Alexander?” He winks. “The best news is when people think they’re pulling something over on someone.”

Humming a little, Alec looks back down at his phone. He takes a single breath, turning his head slightly to kiss Magnus’s wrist. “Out of the frying pan,” he murmurs.

Magnus’s voice is just as quiet– and just as confident– as he replies, “And into the fire.”

#wirtanzenimregen #julia tag #asked #answered #my writing #worth a thousand words #malec fic

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im-fairly-whitty · 6 years

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Caught in the Riptide -- Riptide!Incredibles AU

Violet Parr’s almost-boyfriend Tony Rydinger has super abilities he’s hidden his whole life. That is, hidden until the government asks him to join their new “exemplary taskforce” of new Supers to pave the way for legalized, registered, and government-employed Supers.

Tony has never wanted to be a capital S Super, but he figures that if participating in what he’s assured is really just a publicity campaign is how he can help defend his country against non-registered vigilantes like the Incredibles, then it’s his duty to do his best. Of course, the newly christened Riptide soon realizes that nothing is quite as simple as it seems.

Fanfic for the Riptide!Incredibles AU. A post-movie Incredibles 2 au belonging to @edorazzi (on tumblr).

Part 1: The Offer

“And then my family’s going on a trip next week,” Violet said, flipping on her blinker as they drove through an intersection, “so I don’t know when I’ll be back from that.”

“I can’t believe how many things your family does together.” Tony said, smiling as he stared out at the heavy rain hitting the car window.

He could feel the water all around them, falling from the sky, pelting the windshield, running across the pavement under them and spraying from the spinning wheels of the car as they drove. It made him feel alive. If he were alone he’d have the windows all rolled down.

“Oh, well, I mean, I guess,” Violet said, blushing a little as she turned the wheel, “my dad’s always making us go, and my mom’s always-”

“No, no, I think it’s cool.” Tony said quickly. He and Violet had been spending time together for months now, but she still got embarrassed over the funniest things. “I think it’s really neat that your parents want to spend so much time with you, even if it’s always so last minute. I mean, I wish I could see you more, but I get it.”

“Well, thanks.” Violet said. She was smiling that adorable little smile she did when he knew she wanted to smile big, “And thanks for being cool with it.”

“What kind of friend would I be if I wasn’t?” Tony said, playfully elbowing her, “I mean, you’re the one chauffeuring me to work.”

“Stop it Tony, I’m driving.” Violet said, laughing as she elbowed him back. “Sorry we’re taking all these side roads, Center Street is still all torn up, I hope you’re not going to be late.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll just tell my mom we forgot about the construction.” Tony said, “I guess the Incredibles sure had a blast taking out whoever was trying to rob the bank last week.”

“The DMV.”

“What? I thought they said it was the bank on the news?”

“I mean...it might have been the bank.” Violet said, casually shrugging her shoulders as they drove into the parking lot of the Happy Platter, pulling around back, “I don’t really pay attention to the news I guess.”

“I don’t really either.” Tony said, unbuckling his seatbelt as she parked the car in the back alley behind the restaurant, “All this Super politics stuff kinda goes over my head to be honest.”

“Don’t forget your umbrella,” Violet said as he opened his door, “you’ll get soaked.”

“Thanks.” Tony said, grabbing his black umbrella and opening it with a grin as he stepped out of the car, right into a puddle that came up to his ankles. “I don’t mind a little water though.”

“Well, you’ll mind a lot of water if you start your shift looking like a drowned rat.” Violet said with an amused look, “You’re already in your work clothes, you won’t have time to dry off.”

Tony leaned down to see her one last time, obediently holding the umbrella over himself to stay dry.

“You still want to come over to do homework tomorrow after school?” he asked, leaning his arm against the top of the car door.

“Only if we finally watch that dumb movie you keep bugging me about afterward.” Violet said.

“Aw, come on Vi! Creature from the Black Lagoon is a work of art!” Tony teased, “You just watch, it’ll be a classic someday. I think it’ll be on at seven tomorrow night, I’ll double check which channel.”

“I’m only watching it so I’ll have some peace.” Violet said, rolling her eyes in mock irritation. “I’ll bring the popcorn.”

“Perfect.” Tony said, stepping back so he could shut the door as Violet rolled the window down. “I’ll call you at like ten tonight, when I get off work.”

“Sounds good, my dad should be off the phone by then.” Violet said, “Have a good shift, Tony.”

“Drive safe, Vi.”

Tony backed up as she rolled the window up and put the car in reverse, waving at him as she pulled out of the alley and then drove away, disappearing into the pouring rain.

Tony wasn’t sure what he’d done to deserve having her as a friend, but whatever it was, he was glad he’d done it. And maybe, if he wasn’t reading all the signs completely wrong, they could even be more than friends soon.

He looked down at his shoes, they were completely soaked through to his socks. He smiled as he splashed his right foot a little, then closed his umbrella. He looked up into the stormy grey sky, stretching out his arms as the rain pelted him, soaking him to the bone in seconds.

The water was probably freezing, but even when he was a kid water temperature had never bothered him, whether cold or hot. He spread his fingers wide, letting the feeling wash through him. Every part of him tingled with energy, the water around him feeling like possibility, wanting him to reach out, to let it become a part of him.

But...he was already late for work. And besides, even in a back alley someone might see him.

He took a last deep breath of the stormy air, and then pulled a key out of his pocket, unlocking the back door of his family’s restaurant and letting himself into the kitchens. Mom would be expecting him to be waiting tables already, meaning he had to get out to the front.

He left sloshing footprints across the tile floor of the empty, half-lit backroom as he tossed his umbrella in the corner. Tony closed his eyes, taking in a breath and letting himself feel the water that was dripping off him, the water plastering his hair down, the drop of water dripping off his nose.

He took a careful breath, and then raised both his hands, imagining that he was pulling off a blanket. He opened his eyes as the water on him pulled forward and then off him, gathering into a clear mass floating in front of him, leaving his work uniform and hair completely dry.

He smiled to himself as he carefully moved his wrists, sending the water running through the air and splashing into an old sink, only some of it sloshing onto the floor. He reached out to the spilled water on the floor with his mind, commanding it to gather itself up and sending it up and into the sink with the rest.

Tony grinned as he quickly ran his fingers through his mussed hair and straightened his work uniform bowtie. His breath was a little shaky, but it was worth the satisfaction of an “insta-dry” as he called it.

Only his parents knew about his...skill, and he rarely used it, but he did have a couple small tricks that made life easier when no one was around.

He walked to the sink, turning on the tap for cold, and then walking to the other end of the counter to grab some of the plastic pitchers sitting on the shelf. He arranged a set of plastic tumblers on a serving tray, then looked over at the running tap.

Normally he’d just walk the extra five steps back to the sink to fill the pitchers the normal way...but there was still so much energy running through him from the storm he could still feel raging outside.

He might as well have just a little more fun before getting to work.

He reached out with his mind to the tap water, beckoning it forward with his hand and angling it into the two pitchers he had set on the counter. It took extra focus to keep the running water in the air, but he squinted his eyes, keeping his hands steady as he imagined running an imaginary hose from the faucet to the pitchers, carefully filling them both before letting the stream of water drop back into the sink with a splash.

Tony leaned against the counter, chuckling a little at his slight dizziness as he took a second to collect himself. He picked up one of the pitchers, inspecting it smugly. Not too shabby.

“That’s quite a party trick you have there, young man.”

Tony jumped, whipping around in panic, the pitcher he was holding sloshing water all across the floor.

A man in a trim suit walked out of the shadows on the other side of the room, an amused smile on his face.

Tony’s mind somehow blanked and screamed at him at the same time. The man had seen, he’d seen him use his power, he knew he wasn’t normal. Was he just a patron who’d wandered into the back looking for the bathroom? Was he from some kind of superpower tracking organization? Was he going to arrest him?

“I, I wasn’t, I didn’t-” Tony stuttered, taking a step back and clutching the mostly empty pitcher.

What if the man was a villain?

“Hold on there son, calm down.” the man said, chuckling as he held out a hand, “My name is William Gibbons, I’m just here to talk.”

“C-customers aren’t allowed in the back, Sir.” Tony said, his voice cracking and his brain switching into autopilot as he stared at the man’s outstretched hand.

“Hydrokinesis.” Mr. Gibbons said, putting his unshaken hand back in his pocket, “That’s an incredible power, ever use it for anything bigger than filling water pitchers?”

“No sir, Supers are illegal.” Tony said, his knuckles turning white from his grip on the water pitcher’s handle. “I mean, I think they are, I don’t really listen to the news that close, I just do little things, I mean, I try not to, I mean-”

“I’m sorry to have caught you on your shift Mr. Rydinger, but I have a proposition for you.” Mr. Gibbons said, pulling over two bar stools from the side of the room and sitting on one, waving for Tony to sit on the other. “I’m an agent for the United States Exemplary Taskforce committee for the Superhero Registration Accords initiative. Ever heard of it?”

“I-I don’t think so.” Tony said, cautiously scooting onto the other stool, “I mean, I’ve heard of the accords, everyone’s heard of that I think. Not the other one though.”

What he wanted was to run out of the room, but it was way too late for that. Besides, if Mr. Gibbons was going to hurt or arrest him he already would have, right?

“Well, that’s because the “other one” is a highly classified government project.” Mr. Gibbons said, tugging on the cuffs of his sleeves, “Which is why before we go any further I ask that you keep the subject matter of this conversation between us. I am bringing you into a conversation of utmost importance, one of national security.”

“Of course, yes sir.” Tony said, sitting up straight on his stool. National security?

“Times are changing Mr. Rydinger, as you’re probably aware,” Mr. Gibbons said, “there’s been a shift in our society recently with the re-emergence of Supers. While being a Superhero, and to some extent having super powers, has been illegal until very recently, we’re now seeing more and more individuals step up to the opportunity to use their powers in public. What’s your opinion on it, Anthony?”

“I, well, I guess everyone’s just trying to do their best.” Tony said, shrugging his shoulders, unable to fight off a rising sense of deja vu, “I mean, I know Supers do a lot of damage to buildings and roads, but as long as they’re protecting innocent people I think that’s something good, right? I know there’s a lot of people who are using their powers for bad too though, I guess I can see both sides.”

“You’re a smart kid.” Mr. Gibbons said, nodding, “That’s a very diplomatic answer. Tell me Anthony, have you ever considered being a Super?”

Him? A Super?

“Not since I was really young I think.” Tony said, laughing nervously, “I mean, the whole idea sounds cool to any kid I think, but all I can do is throw water around. And I wouldn’t want to break the law like that anyway, filling glasses is one thing, but I would never go running around trying to stop crime, I’m not like, like the Incredibles or anything.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear that, you’re exactly the kind of person that I’m looking for.” Mr. Gibbons said, reaching into his coat and pulling out a business card, handing it to Tony.

He tipped the card towards the light, the words “Exemplary Taskforce” glinting back at him.

“This is going to be a time that is very confusing for a lot of Supers,” Mr. Gibbons said, watching him closely, “whether they’ve been participating in illegal activity, or doing their civic duty like yourself and obeying the law. The last thing that the government wants right now is for mass chaos to break out, we don’t need everyone who can buy a set of spandex starting to moonlight as a “hero” in their spare time. There need to be rules, there needs to be order. There needs to be an example set for the coming generation of Supers, and I would like you to be part of that.”

“I, what?” Tony said, looking up, “But I’m not a Super, I mean, my power isn’t really good for anything but drying off quickly.”

“That’s only because you haven’t trained your skill,” Mr. Gibbons leaning forward on his stool with a smile, “imagine what it would be like to walk outside into that rain right now and be able to reach out and stop every raindrop for miles around. Imagine being able to dive into the ocean and having all that water respond to your command. Being able to divert rivers to put out fires, containing explosions and debris with a wall of water, immobilizing criminals with the flick of your wrist and a puddle.”

Tony sat on his stool, holding his half-full pitcher of water and hearing the rain pounding the roof above him. For a moment he did imagine. The breathtaking rush that controlling that much water would be, how incredible it would feel to spring into action to help others with his power.

To not be afraid to live that part of himself out in the open.

“Well, when you say it like that it does sound pretty cool.” Tony said, smiling at the business card, “What...would someone on your taskforce do?”

“The taskforce is going to be a group of brand new heroes,” Mr. Gibbons said, “Supers who will be examples of heroes at their peak. Instead of being vigilantes operating with homemade equipment and their own rules, taskforce members will receive professional training, identity protection, publicity management, and a government issued paycheck for their services.

“The reason that Supers were outlawed was because of the unchecked destruction caused by well-intentioned vigilantes playing by their own rules. This time around we’re going to show everyone that Supers and the government can work together, and that it’s better for everyone. No more chaos, everything legal, Supers will finally be able to fully integrate into society. Their efforts will be a proper career, a way to build a safer world for us all.”

“That does sound pretty cool.” Tony said softly.

A world with legal Supers. A world with Supers who could be trained and paid and protected. A world where having powers would never have to be illegal again and everyone could be safe.

“I have school though,” Tony said, looking away from the card, “I have a job helping my parents with the restaurant. I’d really like to help, but I don’t know if I’m good enough to help so many people, there has to be someone better, someone stronger who wants to fight.”

“That son is what we call humility.” Mr. Gibbons said, smiling, “And believe it or not, it’s perhaps the rarest power a Super can have. If you choose to join the taskforce you won’t have to worry, your schooling will be finished with private tutors and your parents will receive a stipend that will cover much more than your half-time table bussing shift, believe me.

“As for strength, that’s what the training is for, and besides, the goal of the task force is not to be soldiers, it’s to have a group of levelheaded Supers that can be ambassadors to the public. Supers who can set an example for others to follow, to show unity and organization to help reign in vigilantes before they come back in full force.”

“And...if I say no thanks?” Tony asked, scratching the back on his head.

“It’s entirely up to you.” Mr. Gibbons shrugged, “There would be a legal silence agreement I would ask you to sign to keep this conversation to ourselves, and then you would be free to bus tables in peace for the rest of your high school career. There’s plenty of other law-abiding Supers out there who would be able to fulfill their duty to serve their country, to take our nation in the right direction, to set an example for the entire world of what unity and freedom really looks like.”

The whole world. A whole generation of Supers. Thousands of people, of kids like him, who’d hidden what they could do their whole lives.

Tony looked down at the water left in his plastic pitcher.

It was crazy, it was completely out of the blue, but...was it really that crazy when he thought about it? He never really wanted to be a Super, a real hero out on the streets, but he’d been born with his talent anyway, and he was already a firm believer that people who could help others should.

“Can I think about it?” Tony asked, looking down and rubbing his thumb over the business card.

“Of course. I wouldn’t expect you to make this kind of decision on the spot.” Mr. Gibbons said, getting off his stool and straightening his hat, “I’ve already spoken with your parents and they’ve given their permission if you’re interested.”

“Really?” Tony’s eyes widened. Mom and Dad had always been alright with his ability, but he’d never really, well, talked to them about it before.

“They understand that you have a unique talent, and that if you choose to develop it legally into a career serving your country that it’s your choice.” Mr. Gibbons said, putting his stool back against the wall, “Of course, I would recommend that you speak with them about it as well. I have another stop here in town before I head back, but when you’ve made up your mind my number is on the back of that card. Don't lose it, and remember that if you agree to join, the sooner you let me know the sooner we can start your training.”

“Yes, sir.” Tony said, getting up from his stool and slipping the card into his apron pocket, this time shaking Mr. Gibbons’ hand when he offered it. “Thank you for coming and talking to me about this, I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”

“You’re a bright kid Anthony,” Mr. Gibbons smiled, “I know you’ll make whatever choice is best. I hope to hear from you soon.”

And without another word, he turned and left the kitchen. Leaving Tony standing alone with his half-full pitcher, and a business card that felt like it was burning a hole in his apron.

Tony stared at the wall for a long minute, his head a mess of thoughts.

He walked to the back door, almost in a daze, propping it open to see the rain still coming down hard outside.

A real Super. Really helping people. Helping bring order and unity. Something that only someone like him could do.

He reached out a hand, pulling some of the rain over to fall across his palm, dripping off his fingertips.

This was something he could do.

[Read Chapter 2: Old Friends]

----------

Hope you enjoyed part 1, I’ve been captured by this au and as usual will be chasing it as far as my excitement takes me. (Which my long-time readers know is usually pretty far.)

I have at least a couple more chapters in mind for this au, so be sure to follow my tumblr and AO3 to catch the next chapter as soon as it posts. Many thanks to @edorazzi on tumblr for starting this au with their wonderful artwork and headcanons, and for welcoming me on to write for it! Their ideas are fantastic and so fun to work with.

Cheers,

- Wit

(Support me on Patreon or buy me a Ko-fi!)

#incredibles #incredibles 2 #violet parr #tony rydinger #pixar #disney #fanfiction #riptide au #wit writes #i told yall i was gonna do it

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macaronitoutgarni · 5 years

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Little life update (I guess this is aimed at ppl who have been following me for a while but whatever floats your boats)

Idk if it’s interesting to y’all but I am gonna quit my current dead-end call-center job and I found an ok job (tutoring) to replace it with, I’m gonna be a little tighter on money because I will have less hours (but a bigger hour salary, tricking me into thinking I am more valuable!) but I can’t do this anymore and everytime I go to work I am scared that I am gonna break in tears or something because I can’t deal with rude-ass babyboomers yelling at me anymore! My mental health is terrible lately and I figured that having that stress bundle gone could be helpful. I am always worried about money anyways so I think I can handle a little less. It’s a big change for me because I had the same job with pretty much the same schedule for the last 3 years. So yeah I am excited to start this new thing but I am not very comfortable with change in general in my life so it’s still very stressful and I just can’t wait to be in a new routine that includes helping kids to learn and do homework instead of calling people to be potentially yelled at.

Also I am really starting to get more stressed about my future in general because I have no idea about what I want to do with my life and my studies (film major) aren’t leading me anywhere so I’ll have to pick a new program at some point and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

But yeah at least I am in a good place socially speaking, I have awesome friends and a even more awesome boyfriend (we’ve been together for around a year now) so it makes it easier to deal with the V O I D lmao

I am also participating in organising an environnemental campain on my campus but also in my country in general and I really enjoy it. I had to take a break from organised activism for the first time this fall (I was doing student union stuff since like 2013) and I’m starting to do it again but slowly to avoid burning out like I almost did a few months ago. I am trying to grow out my hair (how symbolical, I know) for the first time ever and it’s tedious but Idk I don’t really have buzzcuts impulses like I used to so idk it feels like a good time to try longer hair for once.

also I have a cat and I love that big chicken, pics on my insta (jusdoriange) for those who care. I do post more of my ‘’own stuff’’ here so feel free to follow me!

#personnal #work stuff #life stuff

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seriouslyhooked · 5 years

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Lost Souls and Reveries (Part 9)

18 part AU written for @cssns. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8. Story available on AO3 Here and FF Here. Banner created by the amazingly talented @shipsxahoy!!

Killian Jones is a wolf shifter without roots, without plans, and without a pack. He’s a rogue, someone humans should avoid and shifters should be wary of given his lineage. But one night years back set him on a path he didn’t realize he was taking, a path leading to a future he is destined for. That future is tied up in one woman – a human named Emma Nolan. Together Emma and Killian will find not only answers, but a love that’s truly fated. But will love be enough to set them free, or will past demons win out in the end? (Answer: love always wins – I am writing this so despite some tiny pockets of angst it’s basically a fluff-filled insta-love fest). Rated M.

A/N: Hey all! So, as promised, we are back with a new chapter (though I am a day later than my usual posting schedule) and this one is arguably the big one. Finally the reveal is here and I have been waiting for it for what feels like forever. It’s going to take a little bit to get there – after all, I can’t just drop the bomb with no ease in, but by the end of the chapter Emma will know the truth and we will all know her reaction. Without giving too much more away, I’ll leave you all to read. Let me know what you think and I hope you all enjoy!

If someone had told Emma even a month ago that she’d willingly walk down the street hand in hand with a man in front of the whole town, she would have called them crazy. That was absolutely not the kind of thing she ever did, but here she was, braving the Fourth of July festivities, proudly holding tight to Killian’s grasp as they made their way down Main Street and over to the park where the town-wide cookout was already in full swing.

“So you’re really sure you want to do this?” Emma asked, teasing Killian when he had made it abundantly clear that this was exactly what he wanted. “It’s not too late to duck out.”

“And miss the chance to turn up with the world’s most beautiful woman on my arm? Never.”

Emma melted into his compliment, despite how over the top it was, and she marveled at how honest he was being and how she couldn’t deny how much he meant the words. They’d been together for a few weeks now, and in all that time Killian bestowed such praise on her constantly. But it never tipped over into the realm of flattery just for flattery’s sake. It was charming, but it was also real, and it left her feeling as beautiful as he believed her to be while also tempting her to say screw it and skip this cookout entirely. The things that she wanted to do with this man were hardly appropriate for this public setting, and if the past few weeks had taught her anything, it was that Emma was a lot less patient than she once thought.

A few weeks – really only two of actually dating – was a very short window to feel this possessive of what they had. Emma was protective of their relationship, and she cherished it far more than a passing fling or ordinary courtship. It felt big and bold, and traditionally, this was the stage of a relationship where people started labeling things, maybe calling themselves boyfriend and girlfriend. But that particular label didn’t seem like enough. Somehow, since meeting Killian, Emma had realized that there was a trivialness to that once aspired to status. It felt like a temporary step before either a couple would break or move on to more. And sure, maybe people dated for years and years without officially taking things further, but in her heart Emma already felt like she and Killian were more.

That feeling was something she’d been clinging to the past few weeks. For all the growing and sharing they were doing together, and for all the time they’d spent in each other’s company (which never did feel like enough), Emma could still feel some boundaries that simply wouldn’t budge, and she wondered why they were up at all. On her end this felt like a given. She was so confident in the two of them, and though they’d never said the words, Emma knew that Killian loved her. He was in love with her, and she felt the exact same way. So what was left between them that was going unsaid? And why did Emma feel like it mattered a whole heck of a lot?

“There’s nothing I wouldn’t give to know your thoughts right now, love,” Killian murmured as they arrived at the park entrance.

There were people milling about, streaming in to get to the party, but Emma and Killian stopped, standing still in the ebb and flow of foot traffic. Emma turned towards him, meeting his stare after he’d made his comment, and she saw in his gaze that he had picked up on everything she was feeling. He might not know exactly what was bothering her, but he knew something was off, and the look in his eyes was so resolute and certain that she knew he was determined to rid her of any burdens she was carrying. That care and love she saw there only made her fall a little bit more in love, but as much as she wanted to tell him, as much as Emma would like to put it all on the table and be honest with him, she knew it wasn’t the time or place. With their luck her friends or her parents would pop up any second, and the last thing she wanted was to tell Killian that she loved him for the first time with an audience.

“Good thinking. Probably best not to have such a conversation where we could be ambushed.”

Emma gaped at him for a moment before succumbing to laughter. He was funny in his delivery, and the humor was undeniable, but it was also eerie how spot on he was. She knew she hadn’t said anything aloud, but he understood her completely anyway. How was that possible? How could any two people be so in tune with each other? And why didn’t she hate it after spending her life trying to maintain her privacy in a small town where privacy was fleeting?

“Are you like a secret mind reader or something?” She asked, raising a brow at him and taking stock of him all over as if trying to find some kind of physical sign that he was telepathic.

“I’m an Emma reader, and I hate to break it to you, love, but you’re somewhat of an open book.”

“I am not,” Emma said, shaking her head though she still found herself smiling all the same. “You can ask anyone. I’ve got a perfect poker face. I’m undefeated at the legion hall charity games – the definition of cool and collected.”

“With everyone else I dare say you are, love. But with me…” Killian’s words trailed off as he stepped closer, his arms wrapping around her and his fingertips leaving blissful zings of awareness where they brushed against her bare skin. “With us, it’s different. We know each other better than we know ourselves. We’ve learned it fast, but still it’s there. Like a language only we speak.”

“And apparently I can’t shut off the transmission,” Emma said, her voice a bit breathier since Killian was so close and she was wrapped up in his scent, and warmth and big strong arms.

“Would you want to if you could?” Killian asked, a bit of concern crossing into his previously relaxed and happy expression. Instantly Emma sought to rectify it, and she did so by answering him honestly.

“No. I love what we have. I wouldn’t want to change it.”

Thoughtfulness colored his features at that, and while it didn’t alarm Emma, it did remind her of her earlier thoughts. Killian was hiding something, something that worried him. There was a secret he was holding onto, presumably something he thought would change what they already had. But even though Emma didn’t know what it could be, she wanted to tell him that it wouldn’t change things. Whatever he was worried about – whatever he deemed necessary to hold back when they’d always been nothing but open – it wouldn’t ruin this, and it was nothing that they couldn’t handle together. She knew that deep down in her soul.

“Knowing you want this and want me is the greatest gift, love, and I fully intend to show you how grateful I am tonight. But right now…”

“Let me guess, incoming?” Emma asked, knowing that for whatever reason, Killian was always able to tell way before she was when someone was approaching to interrupt one of their interludes.

“Aye, love. Don’t worry though, I’ll protect you.”

His whispered words as Elsa and Anna appeared had Emma chuckling softly to herself, and after giving her best friends a hug, she returned to holding Killian’s hand and began to experience this annual party with a totally new view. It was a very different experience to spend the day like this. Of course she and Elsa and Anna had all been coming together for ages, but they knew the routine like the back of their hand. Killian though was a novice still at Storybrooke’s ways and customs, and watching his reactions to all of it and seeing how excited and desirous to participate he was made Emma’s already present love for her town’s antics grow all the more.

“Okay, so we’ve had food, we’ve made the rounds, we kissed the Captain’s wheel…”

“Which I still don’t get to be honest,” Killian whispered low enough so only Emma could hear as Anna went about listing what they’d already done. It was a Storybrooke tradition to kiss the old ship’s wheel statue in the park at this festival every year, but no one really knew why that was or how the tradition started. Seeing Killian’s reaction to it had been hilarious because he seemed to be the only rational one in attendance, but even with the weirdness, he ended up complying. Just the thought of his reaction, however, made Emma laugh, and she muffled the giggle by ducking into him and using him to keep the sound quiet.

“Now the only thing left to do is rumble!” Anna announced gleefully.

“Rumble? Like a fight?” Killian asked, his stance tensing ever so slightly as he moved to bring Emma a bit closer. It was a protective action, one that Emma appreciated though it wasn’t actually needed. She clarified for Anna, speaking in terms an outsider could understand.

“Every year we duke it out at the game tents. It’s a big thing – we play every game and whoever ends with the biggest prize wins,” Emma said, and while she saw that Killian was appeased that there wouldn’t actually be physical violence, he was clearly still concerned about the terminology. Elsa, however, chose this time to cut in.

“But one year when we were kids, the orders got messed up for the game prizes. Emma’s Mom ordered normal fair things like stuffed animals and blow up toys and instead the town got five hundred fake WWE championship belts.”

“You’re kidding,” Killian said, not believing it at all, but then he looked at Emma and his eyes widened. “Seriously?”

“Oh yeah,” Emma replied. “And, never one to let the unexpected cramp her style, Mom really leaned in. Most of us didn’t know anything about professional wrestling -,”

“Heck we still don’t,” Elsa interrupted with a laugh as Emma smiled.

“But all the adults made a really big effort to make it cool for one night so that we wouldn’t be disappointed when all we got was a belt.” Killian’s eyes softened at that and he nodded, silently acknowledging how touching and fun that must have been.

“So to honor that night – and to honor Emma’s Dad’s job, which was just to keep yelling ‘Let’s get ready to rumble!’ the whole time – we call this the rumble.”

The laugh Killian let loose at the story prompted Emma and her friends to laugh as well. It was, after all, a very funny thing, and Emma could still remember her Dad that night. He knew nothing about wrestling, except for some old catch phrase, but he’d done everything in his power to see them all enjoy themselves, and he had definitely succeeded.

“Well, I might not be the best, seeing as I haven’t been to a fair in… I couldn’t even say how long,” Killian admitted. “But if it’s a rumble we’re having, then I’m in.”

“Great!” Anna said gleefully, and her tone was so chipper it spoke to some kind of scheming. Before Emma could rein her in though, she was already presenting her thoughts. “So I’m thinking you versus Elsa. You fight for Emma, Elsa fights for me, winner gets the better unicorn plushie at the end of this.”

“Anna,” Emma said, not even knowing how to proceed. She wanted to tell her friend that was silly and that she didn’t need Killian to prove himself with some dumb fair games, but then he squeezed her hand and she looked back at his smiling face.

“If you’re okay with cheering me on, I think I’ve got this, love.” How could she say no to that? Between the handsome face and the hot as hell accent, lilting in that heated way she loved so dearly, she was helpless to do anything but accept.

From there, a truly impressive ‘rumble’ proceeded. The four of them went to every tent for every game, and it turned out that Elsa and Killian were well matched. Killian, for his part, was excellent at any game requiring strength and precision, while Elsa was amazing at all the games of chance and seeming randomness. She anticipated better than anyone Emma knew, which usually made her the undisputed winner on fair night, but tonight it was neck and neck, until the final game – the ring toss.

“You couldn’t write this better,” Anna said to Emma as they stood off watching Elsa and Killian prepare for the final event.

“Couldn’t write what?” Emma asked, not following.

“The ring toss,” Anna said, matter of factly. Emma blinked, not knowing what her friend was getting at. “Oh come on, Emma. Killian’s going to win you the title with a ring, and it’s only a matter of time before he gives you a very different kind of ring giving you a very different kind of title.”

Realization sunk in after a moment and Emma blushed as she swatted Anna’s arm. “Anna, shh, he’ll hear you.”

“Oh please. That man is in love. L-O-V-E, love,” Anna said in what could best be described as a stage whisper. “There are more than wedding bells in the air, Emma. Don’t think we all can’t see that.”

Emma’s stomach flipped at the thought. It was something that was so out of this world – getting married? That couldn’t possibly be on her radar so soon, and yet it was. This was not the first time she had thought about a future with Killian, and that future, at least the ideal one that her heart liked to surmise about, especially in her dreams, did involve getting married someday. If she were honest with herself, the dreams included that day coming way sooner than it probably should too, but she had never vocalized those wants before and she was worried Killian would hear. For all the good that had blossomed between them these past few weeks, and for as fast as she had grown to love him, Emma couldn’t help feeling like there was one last step to take before the future Anna was hinting at. There was one last wall to conquer – one more thing that lay in their path – and while Emma was working on overcoming it, she wouldn’t rush Killian.

As if he could feel her watching him, Killian chose that moment to glance back at her. She didn’t think that he had heard Anna, but she could feel the intensity of his emotion even from the distance. He was more than clear with his thoughts about her and his care for her, and when he smiled it set the anxiety her friend had just let loose fading away. Emma felt exponentially better, and she offered him her own smile before he turned back to take on the toss.

“I really want this,” Emma whispered, her voice low but her meaning more sincere than nearly any words she’d said aloud before. “I want him.”

“And you have him,” Anna said as she came to take Emma’s hand. “Totally and completely.”

Emma exhaled a deep breath at the words and she smiled again, following Anna’s lead back to Killian and Elsa. They were just about finished with the game. All that was left was one ring on each of their parts. Elsa went first, tossing and almost getting it to stay on the neck of the milk bottle, but it was Killian who was victorious in the end. He cast the ring with a finesse Emma hadn’t expected, and it landed perfectly atop the bottle, making him the victor.

The excitement and the pride that Emma felt in the face of his winning was certifiably over the top. This year’s rumble did not require that she leap into his arms and squeal with the excitement of a kid rather than the woman she was, but Emma didn’t care. She felt so light and free with Killian, and when things were good, she wanted to enjoy how good they really were. Life lived like this was a breath of fresh air, and the cherry on top was when she was back on the ground, still in his arms, and he leaned down to kiss her exactly like the conquering hero did in every romance book she’d ever read.

“Okay, okay we get it. You love each other. No need to give us all a show.”

Anna’s words brought Emma back into the present, and she knew that a blush had crept over her cheeks at the mention of love, but she didn’t back down. Instead she shook her head with feigned censure, and told Anna that she did want a show. If she didn’t she wouldn’t be so nosy all the time.

“Fair point,” Anna confessed with a shrug. “But since I’m turning over a new, more mature leaf, might I suggest hightailing it out of here? A little birdie told me your Mom is like thirty seconds from popping up.”

“Well we could wait…” Killian offered, not wanting to rush Emma, even though he knew by now what her parents’ appearance would mean. They had said hello and spent a little time with them earlier, but a second meeting would no doubt be longer than the first. Her mother would talk both of them to death, and at the same time she’d thoroughly squash the mood that celebratory kiss had just sparked in Emma.

“Or we could save ourselves and run,” Emma said, pulling him along with her as she cast a goodbye over her shoulder to her friends. “Love you guys, see you tomorrow.”

Anna and Elsa waived goodbye after them, and, through some stroke of immense luck, Emma and Killian managed to get out of the fair grounds without being spotted by the leaders of the Nolan clan. The rest of the town certainly saw them, and Emma noticed the looks that each neighbor cast their way. What surprised her though was the softness she saw there – people had largely accepted Killian, and they seemed really happy for the two of them. That acceptance made Emma happy. She didn’t need it, but she was glad for it. It would hopefully make the whole telling him he was the one and convincing him that this was a forever kind of thing that much easier.

“So, now that you’ve gotten me alone, what’s the plan, love?”

Killian’s question rumbled from his chest, washing over Emma with a trickle of seduction. He wasn’t even trying to do anything, but Killian was just too hot for her to fully function. She closed her eyes for a second, grounding herself in this and in him, and then she opened them and told him what she wanted.

“Take me to your place.”

Her request made Killian’s eyes widen, but she knew he wasn’t surprised. Over the last few weeks the heat between them had only been burning hotter and brighter, but despite some kisses that blew her away, and despite the tantalizingly distracting feel of his rough but also gentle touch, Emma and Killian hadn’t taken things to that next step. She’d been ready for it, aching for the chance to be alone with him and make some of her more vivid fantasies real, but Killian had been taking things slowly. Tonight, however, Emma didn’t want slow. She wanted to go all in, and she wanted to now.

“As you wish.”

Emma’s heart thumped loudly in her chest as they walked, hand in hand, from the park where the festivities had been through the town towards his cabin. By the time they reached the woods, Emma’s anticipation was at record levels. Her whole body was swimming with desire, and she could barely contain it. She knew Killian was aware of it too because his jaw had gone hard but his blue eyes were molten every time he looked her way. He seemed seconds away from sweeping her up into his arms and carrying her, and she would have welcomed that, especially in the moment where she got so distracted that her foot caught on a root that was sticking up slightly from the ground below.

Before Emma could hit the earth with a loud and painful thud, Killian had pulled her to him, cradling her in the warm and strong embrace she’d come to love so much. Somehow her back had ended up at his front, but their bodies were aligned perfectly even like this. The breath rushed out of her, and her body had to play catch up for a moment. She had braced herself for a fall, but it simply hadn’t come, and she blinked away the adrenaline before realizing that they were in another stretch of woods she knew very well…

In the moment just before waking, Emma already knew that she was not where she should be. The ground beneath her was hard, though the grass licked lightly at her skin in a soft and pleasing way. The air was too fresh and too pure for her to be at home and in bed, and the smells around her… she was definitely outside, and that meant it had happened again. She’d had the dream, and she’d left the house as she slept, completely unaware of what she was doing.

Blinking until the early morning dawn didn’t hurt her eyes so badly, Emma’s first sight was the canopy of the trees she’d ended up in. They were giant pines, tall and proud and ever growing, and while they would be considered beautiful and tranquil at any other time, right now they spiked only fear in Emma. She was outside again, presumably alone out here in the elements, and she didn’t know how to stop it.

Rising from the ground, Emma noticed how covered she was in dirt. It climbed up her legs from her bare feet, tore at her clothes, and no doubt smudged her face and her neck as it did her hands and arms. She was a mess right now, and the one thing she remembered most from the dream was the howl of a wolf. It was loud, defiant, but also familiar, and Emma could feel it still reverberating through her, as if she herself had made the sound instead of hearing it in a dream.

Making her way through the woods, trying to remain unseen by anyone who might happen to be out at this ungodly hour, Emma tracked back through the dream. The foundations were the same. It started with that night at the hospital. Two wolves – one good, one bad, fighting over her. She was trapped, she was scared, but then she wasn’t. The midnight one seemed to care for her, to protect her, and then the dream would morph. Suddenly she wasn’t in Boston anymore, she was in the woods, these woods.

She also wasn’t Emma anymore at this point, at least not really. Her point of view was too low, her movements so different than if she’d been walking or running on her own. She was aware of so much – too much – and the darkness of the world did nothing to deter her. She could see everything, feel everything, and she was totally in control. She’d made her way through her favorite groves, tracking and running, and then at the end, she’d made it to the river and she looked into the water only to see another wolf. This one was so different – a pale, almost white coat making the beast look amazing and other worldly, and it was this animal that howled, this revelation that pushed her mind from sleep to wake.

Even now, Emma didn’t know what to make of all of this. Why was there a new wolf when she’d been battling familiar ones all this time? And what did it mean that the wolf had been where she had been? Doctor Hopper would call this projection. Emma knew he’d explain it away as more stress, likely over choosing which college she wanted to go to, not that her parents were going to let her go. With all of this happening who could blame them? Emma was crazy, really and truly crazy and there was no hope of her ever being normal or accepted when this was her deep dark secret…

“Emma?” Killian’s concerned voice broke the spell of her remembrance, and Emma shook her head slightly before looking back at him. She could see in his eyes so much love, and suddenly she felt an urge, an urge to tell him something she’d never even told her very best friends. Something her parents knew, but didn’t really know, since she’d kept parts from them and from Archie. It was a moment of truth, one final test, and Emma hoped that maybe it would be the thing he needed to come forward with his own secret.

“I used to have these crazy dreams, right when we got back from Boston,” she began, continuing to walk through the copse of trees towards his cabin with his hand in hers. “They were wild and exhausting. I’d sleep ten hours but feel like I never went to bed. They were all so vivid in the moment too. One second I was living this undeniable double life. It was almost more real than the world I was living in, but when I woke up I’d start to forget. The pieces would slip away, but the feelings still remained. The doctors said it was stress, but I would - I mean I used to… sleep walk.”

Emma expected Killian to ask for more, but when she looked back up at him he remained quiet. His eyes were fixed on her, his expression unreadable, but she felt a silent urging from him for her to continue so she did.

“The walking was tamer at first. I’d wake up in the kitchen or the back yard. Still close to home, but definitely not where I should be. But by the end of my senior year it was bad… really bad. My parents had to lock every door, install an alarm in a town with virtually no crime, and keep an eye out. They took shifts of who would sleep, and sometimes I still got out. I have no idea how, and they didn’t either.”

“And when you got out, where did you go?” Killian asked, his voice even despite the fact that she was telling him this alarming bit of back-story.

“The woods. Always the woods.”

She gave him some more details of those morning memories. They were hard to speak about, mostly because they were so radically out of the norm, and by the time they’d gotten to his house Emma was starting to feel like maybe this was too much. She hadn’t said any of this aloud in so long and it sounded even more bizarre to her now than it did then, but luckily Killian didn’t seem off put in any way. The only thing he could see on her face was concern for her safety and something else that surprised her. It was almost like he didn’t think these dreams were that insane, and she wondered how he could be so calm in the face of something so strange and wild.

“God, Emma, that sounds… frightening and more than a little scary.”

“It was in a way,” Emma admitted. “But it wasn’t where I woke up that scared me, it was the part when I was awake again. I always had this sinking feeling that I was forgetting something, something really important. It was like something wasn’t right in the light of day. Something was really really wrong, and… well I mean it wasn’t. Everything was fine, and then my birthday came, and I don’t know, I felt a lot better suddenly. I was a bit more settled than I had been. The dreams didn’t come as much, and now when they do it’s just a dream. No random relocations thrown in the mix.”

“That’s good to hear,” Killian said, his hands running over her as much for her comfort as for her his own. “I hate to think of you out in the world and without protection. If anything ever happened to you…”

“I’m fine,” Emma promised, trying to convince him that she was in fact all right as they took a seat on his couch. “I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.”

Pulling him down for a kiss, Emma was so relieved when Killian kissed her back. He might have felt a bit withdrawn when she’d made the confession about her dreams, but he was with her now in an undeniable way. The only problem was, that when they finally came back for air, the walls had come up again. He was sitting here, holding her close and doing that thing where he subtly protected her from the whole entire world, but she could see the difference and feel it too and it was terrible. She hated it. Simply hated it.

“I shouldn’t have said all that, should I?” Emma asked, her heart hurting in her chest at the realization that she might just have fucked this up. “I messed up.”

“No, Emma. You’re perfect, and I’m glad you told me. Truly I am,” he assured her and Emma smiled at the words, knowing he meant them even if he was still being weird. “You know how I feel about you. In your heart you know, but I haven’t said it aloud yet because… because I’ve been keeping something from you.”

Emma’s heart constricted in her chest even though she had known this was coming. Killian had a secret, something he’d been guarding all this time, and if she knew him as much as she thought she did, it was something he’d probably never told anyone at all. Yet even with the sadness she felt that he had kept something from her, it wasn’t distrust that settled within her. She only wished to help him and to alleviate his pain. Whatever it was, he was so worried and she couldn’t do anything to help until he told her. She moved closer, her hand coming to rest over his heart, which was beating so fast it must be painful, and then she made him a promise she knew he had to hear.

“Whatever it is we can face it together. It’s you and me, okay?”

A moment passed where Killian didn’t say anything. He seemed caught up in something, a memory if she wasn’t mistaken. For a moment it was like he wasn’t there, but Emma instinctively reached out to him, taking his hand. When they touched he was instantly back with her, and his eyes shone bright with a need to be with her.

“You and me, right?”

“Always.”

Hearing him say that made Emma breathe easier. Whatever was happening in his mind right now, there was no hiding the truth, and Killian still wanted this. But as much as she had been willing to give him time before, Emma’s patience had grown frail. She felt like this weight he was carrying was the only thing left between them, and she wanted so badly for him to let it go. If he did they’d be free to just… be, and as strange as that sentiment was, Emma’s instincts told her that they needed that. She knew he wasn’t going anywhere, but whatever secret he was harboring, he needed to share, not just for her sake, but for his as well.

“There’s something about me you don’t know, love. I’m…”

Killian trailed off, and Emma knew that they had finally reached the moment of truth. She had literally no idea where this was going. Killian had kept this guarded for weeks. It was the only part of him she hadn’t had access to, and she needed it even though she felt a tiny bit of fear. Why was he so hung up on this? Was it really so bad? She just wouldn’t know until he said something.

“You’re…” she prompted, her eyes searching his face which was clouded with worry. Then his words came so quickly she almost didn’t hear them.

“I’m a shifter.”

“A shifter,” Emma parroted, and though she didn’t understand what that was, the words came out less as a question than a statement. The term sparked the remembrance she had back at the clinic a few weeks ago, but she shook her head, knowing that couldn’t have been real. It must mean something. Was this a fetish or something? No, it wasn’t. It couldn’t be. She’d have sensed that red flag early on. But whatever it was, this part of her, deep down inside was suddenly excited and elated for now explainable reason. “I don’t know what that means.”

“It means… actually, it’s probably better if I show you.”

Taking her hand in his Killian brought Emma to sit on the couch in his living room. It was a strange thing to do, but Emma knew it was because whatever this was, it was so big he thought she might fall from the shock of it. Meanwhile the word kept bouncing around in her head. Shifter. Shifter. Shifter. She tried to fathom what this was, and if her old, probably made up memory could be accurate, but then she was distracted by Killian moving back across the room and pulling the shirt he was wearing over his head. Emma was not expecting him to strip down in front of her, and despite this being a very serious moment her eyes honed in on his muscled physique. A thrill coursed through her as more and more of him was revealed, and when he was finally down to just his briefs she found her words.

“Killian, what are you…?”

She trailed off when Killian took a deep, steadying breath and then, well, shifted. Like shifted from a man into a wolf in a split second. It was the craziest thing she’d ever seen. One second he was there, for a fleeting moment there was this transition that happened so quick you would blink and you missed it, and then there was this animal – a huge, black wolf, standing where Killian had just been. The animal was poised and powerful, and then his eyes opened and Emma instantly recognized them and him too.

“Holy shit! Holy shit you’re a wolf!” she said, her voice coming out harsh with the emotion of the realization. “Killian, you’re my wolf! Oh my God Killian, you’re my wolf! The wolf from the alley… the wolf from my dreams…”

Killian let out a low whine in his animal form, and though Emma wasn’t exactly fluent in large, wild canine speak, she knew it was a signal that she was right. It completely amazed her that any of this was happening. Now she knew why Killian had her sit down for this reveal. She was dizzy from the shock of it, but she also had this intrinsic need to get up and be close to him. She was fascinated by his coat and color, by how large his animal was, and of course the fact that he could turn into an animal at all. But before she asked those questions, and before she addressed how the hell any of this was possible, she moved across the room to where he was and hesitantly reached out to touch him.

When her fingers made contact with the warmth of his fur, her whole body filled with the most wonderful feeling. It was somehow more consuming than their first time meeting, and finally she knew that the last piece of the puzzle was solved. This was the secret Killian was hiding. This was the truth he’d had to keep hidden, and God what a beautiful, amazing, and magical truth it was. Emma’s eyes actually misted up at the fierceness of all the she felt, but she kept the tears at bay to try and speak her thoughts aloud.

“I don’t understand how this can be real. You’re a wolf – sorry, a shifter – and you saved me. Back in Boston…”

Now Killian did return to himself and Emma jumped at the transformation, more from surprise than fear. No, there was nothing like fear here at all. She felt completely safe with Killian still, but she hoped he would fill in the blanks so her mind could truly comprehend all she’d just seen.

“Aye, I did, love.” She knew it was him, but it still felt good to hear him say it. So all this time she hadn’t been crazy. There was a wolf, and somehow, someway, he’d found his way back to her.

“Wow. That’s so… crazy,” she said for lack of a better descriptor. “What are the odds?”

“I’d say about one in a billion,” he replied and she laughed, the sound pitched higher than normal from the bevy of emotion. Killian, for his part, stepped closer to her, testing the waters but finding Emma didn’t need any space. She moved towards him too, and reveled in the feel of his arms around hers.

“And you found me again. How did you do that? Did you track me or something?”

“No, Emma. It was all instinct. I had the urge to come to Maine for years now, but I finally gave in after resisting so long. I didn’t realize what we were to each other when we first met, but my wolf knew subconsciously you were out there somewhere in the world, calling to me.”

“And what are we to each other?” She asked with a breathless sense of wonder. She knew that her tone spoke to a true yearning to know, and that she was holding nothing back. Right now she was an open book, but it felt only right since he was just as open with her.

“We’re what’s called fated mates, love. In my world it’s normal. All shifters have their perfect partner, their other half, and you, Emma Nolan, are mine, just as I am yours. Bonds between humans and shifters… well I’ve never heard of one happening, but it could be the reason you had those dreams and felt those things. It could be our bond, just working in more mysterious ways.”

“Oh thank God,” Emma said with genuine relief finally it was Killian’s turn to look confused. He must not understand her thoughts on this, so she tried to explain them. “It’s just I’m totally crazy about you. I wanted you from the first second I saw you and I feel like you’re the one. It’s good to know that’s real. It’s not just my mind playing tricks on me.”

“It’s real,” Killian murmured, his hand coming to cup her cheek, sending a zing of awareness through her already sensitive flesh. “It’s the realest thing I’ve ever known, the surest love that can ever be found.”

“Love?” Emma asked and Killian nodded.

“Love. I love you, Emma. For now and always. For this life and every other, I love you.”

Hearing that was the most remarkable thing that had ever happened to her. Knowing that she and Killian were destined to be together was amazing, but to hear that he loved her… it just filled her so completely with joy that she was at a loss for words. She jumped further into his arms, wrapping herself around him as she kissed him with all the passion that she had. He mirrored those feelings and that desire so perfectly too. They were wholly connected and on the same page and Emma had never felt better in all her life. She was finally alive, finally getting the chance to know the best that happiness had to offer, and she never wanted to let go. But of course, ever the responsible and reasonable one, Killian realized there was still more to be said. Before they could get too carried away, he pulled back, and when she looked at his cerulean eyes, she saw he still had things to explain, things she needed to know.

The story of his life, as a shifter and as a man, came easily then. Killian let it all out, every last part, leaving no detail unaddressed. Emma listened to everything he outlined for her about his past losses and heartaches and his life as a shifter. He talked about the pull of the full moon each month and the mating bond that would come when they finally came together. He talked more about shifter culture and the devotion he’d always have to her and the family they might one day make together. Then he explained how their case was one that he never imagined possible – there were no known cases of shifters and humans being fated pairs, but that didn’t make him any less sure. He showed her his mark and she in turn showed him where hers had appeared, at her hip. She wrote it off as weird reaction to something that would fade away in time, but then she looked at where she’d touched him, and she marveled at their perfect set of markings.

“Wow… just… wow,” Emma said, smiling to herself as she continued to hold onto him. “Wait, you just told me you’re a lone wolf now but you called it something else…”

“A rogue,” Killian replied and he watched as a connection formed in Emma’s mind.

“That’s what Graham called you that day at the diner… oh my God, Graham has to be a shifter, right?”

“A wolf, like me,” Killian confessed, sending Emma’s mind in a dozen directions. How could he have hidden it? Who else knew? Then Killian dropped another bomb she never expected. “He and Tink are the only other shifters in the direct vicinity.”

“Oh my God Tink too?” Emma asked, her eyes widening. “That’s so cool! Is she a wolf also?”

“A lynx,” Killian said, before explaining to Emma that there were dozens of shifter species the world over, some more rare than others.

“I can’t believe you guys manage to keep it a secret…” Emma said, but then her stomach clenched as she thought back to that memory. It had to be real and not a dream like she thought, and that, given everything Killian had said about rules and the council, was not a good thing. “But Killian, I think my parents know. I mean they might… I have this memory of a mountain lion at the clinic and my Mom saying the word so… maybe?”

“I don’t know about your mother, love…” Killian left the rest unsaid.

“But my Dad knows, doesn’t he?” Emma didn’t need to ask. His face said everything, and it also said he felt terrible not coming right out and saying so himself.

“I think it’s best to ask him yourself.”

“God this is all so much. I never imagined this, but somehow I feel like I always knew. Is that normal?”

“It’s our mating bond,” Killian informed her. “It’s strong already, and it will grow even stronger if you choose to be mine in every way.”

“Oh I’m definitely choosing you,” Emma said, completely sure of herself and Killian actually hummed out a sound of approval, that sent waves of pleasure through her. Holy crap, that was hot. Was that a shifter thing? Or just a man who really really wanted her to love him? “I love you, Killian, and I want this. More than anything.”

“That makes two of us, love. But this is fast, especially given human custom. What I’ve told you tonight is a lot to process and I need you to be sure. There’s no going back once a mating bond has been sealed so we can wait as long as you need. The full moon this month is tomorrow, but I would wait forever for you.”

“And if I don’t want to wait?” Emma asked, her heart pounding so loudly at even the thought of mating with him. She wanted it so badly, but she also felt the severity of his words. This was a huge step and an even bigger commitment, and that was something to at least sleep on for one night.

“I will always do everything in my power to see you happy, Emma. You have my word on that.” She nodded, glad for his loyalty and devotion that he made apparent with every word and touch and look he sent her way.

“I think I need to talk to my parents,” Emma confessed after a few moments of internal musing. “Or at least my Dad. But I do want this, Killian. Nothing you told me tonight changes how I feel. I knew that I would love you forever before I knew everything, and I still feel that way. I’ll always feel that way.”

“I trust you, Emma. More than I can say. If you say you’re ready then I’ll believe you, but have a night to think on it. Tomorrow if you feel the same, you will find me and we’ll be together, and if not I’ll still be here. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Let me guess, this is the part where you say goodnight,” Emma said, sighing in a dramatic way they were both used to by now. He was ever the gentleman, and though she knew they could spend the night together and not go too far, Killian would never dream of attempting such a feat. “There isn’t anything I can say to convince you otherwise is there?”

“Not tonight, love. I know it’s not easy, but it’s how it has to be. I can’t trust myself not to take all I want. I’m only so strong.”

“I get it,” Emma acknowledged. “I don’t love it, but I get it.”

“Soon enough it’ll be tomorrow,” Killian said, but then he tilted his head and adjusted his words. “I lied. It’ll never be soon enough. I want you every second of every day.”

Her heart melted at that and Emma pulled him in for another kiss, this one soft but slow and languid. It was peaceful but resiged, and still she hoped he could feel her love in it, because she really did love him. So so much.

“Until tomorrow then,” Emma said, trying to capture his slight lilt and Killian laughed shaking his head.

“Uh, no, love. If you think I’m letting you walk alone at night you have another think coming. I’ll see you home and safe, just as I always do.”

And with that, the two of them set out back to Emma’s house, where they did, regrettably part ways. But though she had so much more to consider and to talk about with her father, Emma knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that tomorrow they’d come together for real. It was time for them to be one – to be mated as he called it – and as she fell asleep that night, Emma’s dreams were filled with the magic Killian brought into her life, and hopeful visions of what might be when they were truly and totally together at last.

Post-Note: So there we have it – Emma now knows about shifters and true mates and pretty much everything. I have purposefully left some vagueness about how much of Killian’s past he has talked about though, mostly because the flashbacks haven’t revealed it yet. Regardless, next chapter will be important because it’s from Emma’s POV. She is going to confront her father and once she has all the info (which she, and we, definitely do not have) she will make her choice. Hope that you guys enjoyed the chapter and would love to hear your thoughts! Thanks so much for reading and have a great rest of your weekend!

Tag list (if you would like to be added please let me know!): @jennjenn615 @kmomof4 @resident-of-storybrooke @winterbaby89 @teamhook @ultraluckycatnd @artistic-writer @snowbellewells @coliferoncer @allofdafandoms-blog @snarkycaptainswan4 @eastside-divebar

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wardencommanderrodimiss · 6 years

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Klavier releases a new single and part of it features Taka's screeches as part of the song, Apollo thinks it's weird but it's hailed as artistic and avant garde.

Hey did you remember this ask from a month ago because I did and here’s the payoff.

“No.”

“It would be hilarious.”

“No.”

“You let Fräulein Cykes talk you into making him an Instagram.”

“That is different.”

“And a Twitter.”

“That is also–”

“Just say that you like her more than me, ja? I won’t be offended.”

“You should already know that I like her more than I like you.”

“I should have expected that.”

“Do you not have work to be doing, Gavin-dono?”

“I do not. I have nothing better to do than bother you. I imagine the Fräulein would quite enjoy some photos of our dear Herr Birdie in a recording studio for his insta, ja?”

“You are not going to ask her–”

“It is far too late; I texted her ten minutes ago.”

“You are an absurdity of the likes of which I have only ever seen on a witness stand or the defense’s bench. What compels you to be as you are?”

“In general, or specifically why I want my next single to feature Herr Taka?”

“Yes.”

“There are too many music critics with heads so far up their own asses that they can taste the prohibitively expensive wine which they drank with lunch, whose superiority complexes have bid them to dismiss every song I have ever written simply because teenage girls like me, and I want them to be crushed under the weight of their own pretentiousness as their alleged artistic sensibilities struggle to reconcile the avant-garde aspect of featuring a bird of prey on a track with the fact that I was once the lead singer for a boyband.”

Klavier waits, his elbows propped up on Simon’s desk, grinning at him, waiting for any sort of reaction. The seconds tick by as Simon, staring past Klavier, slowly blinks once and refocuses his eyes on him. He blinks again. Klavier is still grinning.

“You are not… actually going to bring him into a recording studio, are you?”

“Of course I am. I am an artiste.”

“You are a witless lunatic.”

Apollo has not had time to close the door of the office behind him before Trucy, bouncing, has appeared in front of him with a grin on her face to inform him, “Prosecutor Gavin put out a new single!”

“Uh-huh,” Apollo says, trying to feign disinterest, which is difficult given the special powers of every single other person who inhabits the office. Athena has appeared in the doorway, grinning at him. She doesn’t stop grinning, either, and her expression doesn’t waver in the slightest, like some static image at home on the poster for a horror movie. “Athena, why are you grinning like that?”

“No reason,” she says, and her smile reappears larger than ever.

“Uh-huh,” he says. He decides to ignore her. “Have you listened to it yet, Trucy?”

“No, I was waiting for you, since it just came out this morning!”

“Don’t these things usually happen at midnight?” Apollo asks before he realizes that knowing this fact probably does not help his intended image of appearing disinterested in the music industry and Prosecutor Gavin’s career.

Trucy shrugs. Athena has not stopped grinning. “Stop making that face,” Apollo says.

“No,” Athena says, through her teeth, her smile still plastered across her face.

“You look like Professor Means.”

“Augh!” That did it. Her face twists like she is trying to get peanut butter out of her mouth, massaging the remains of the smile out. “That’s mean, Apollo, that’s really mean.”

“It’s Means, I think you mean,” Trucy says, expertly dodging the smack that Athena aims for her arm. “Have you heard it yet, Athena?”

“No,” she says, now looking like she is trying to stifle the smile that is again spreading across her face.

“You’re lying,” Apollo and Trucy say in unison.

“Ooh, Athena, do you know something about this?” Trucy asks, bouncing again as she makes her way over to her laptop.

“No.”

“I don’t even need my bracelet to tell that you’re lying now,” Apollo says.

“Is this finally the love confession for Apollo that all his music from the past year has been building up to?” Trucy asks.

“The what,” Apollo says.

Trucy waves a dismissive hand at him. “I’ll explain later; I have charts to back me up.”

“You have what,” Apollo says.

“If it is that,” Athena says, “then he didn’t tell me.”

“What did he tell you?” Trucy asks.

“Just play the stupid song,” Apollo says.

“Finally!” Widget crows and Athena slaps her hand over her necklace.

If Apollo were to admit it, which he won’t, most of Prosecutor Gavin’s music isn’t bad. Some of it isn’t to Apollo’s tastes, especially not at the cacophony of a live concert, but all of the Gavinners albums are at least okay in places, and the solo stuff is better. And it’s probably good for his sanity that he thinks so, because every time a new single drops, Trucy plays it on loop for at least a week and never ever uses headphones.

He sort of hopes she won’t do that with this one though, because it’s just… weird. Not Klavier’s usual style, inasmuch as there has been a coherent thread between his solo releases, and not to Apollo’s liking. Trucy is bobbing her head though, tapping the desk as they huddle around the laptop, and Athena is the one bouncing on her heels now. “What’s that sound that keeps coming up?” Apollo asks when he’s turned it over in his brain enough to decide that whatever the hell is going on in the background mixing is neither an instrument that he knows nor a normal human sound.

“Shh!” Trucy hisses, and her frown means that he’s earned himself a second loop of the song for talking through part of it.

About twenty seconds later, he asks, “Is that some sort of bird?”

“Looklook look!” Athena has an arm around his neck in a second, pulling Trucy close with the other, and she shoves her phone under their noses. “Look!”

“That’s a bird in front of a microphone,” Trucy says, a little confused and probably more disgruntled that Athena is now talking over the music too.

“That’s… that’s not Taka, is it?” Apollo asks. His head is starting to hurt.

“It’s Taka!” Athena drops her phone on the laptop keyboard and does a hopping dance around the desk. “Taka’s a singer now! Look!” She wedges herself in between them again to swipe through more pictures on her phone, the first eight of which are the first picture from slightly different angles, with Taka barely having moved. There’s one that is obviously a candid with Klavier talking to someone off-camera to the left, his guitar in hands, Taka on his shoulder; another with Klavier doubled over laughing at something, Taka halfway out of the frame, Simon standing off to the left staring straight at the camera with the barest hint of a smirk on his face; Klavier sitting on an amp, Taka perched on the head of the guitar. A selfie of Athena making a peace sign in front of a shelf of shiny awards; a wobbly picture obviously not taken by Athena because the subject is her grinning and poking one of the trophies. A video looking to be taken accidentally, unfocused angled at the ground as Klavier’s voice comes from somewhere: “–murdered with that as the weapon they will find your fingerprints and arrest you for it.”

“Then we spent like twenty minutes talking about what the best murder weapon in the room would be,” Athena adds.

“It looks like you had fun,” Trucy says. Apollo can hear the jealousy seeping into her voice and Athena’s head jerks up in alarm.

“I was only there because Prosecutor Gavin told me about the idea of having Taka on the track, so that I could help convince Simon, but then it turned out that Simon agreed because - something about spite, I don’t know what they were saying - and then I blackmailed him into letting me come to the recording session too because otherwise I could tell the world about his upcoming single. I’m sure if you wanted to see the place you could ask him! I’ve wanted to tell you guys about this for like a month!”

Apollo has a sinking feeling that Trucy won’t be the one overplaying the song, but rather Athena instead will. This suspicion only intensifies when she retrieves her phone to show them the last of the pictures, which includes a selfie of the four of them, Taka perched on Athena’s head, and at least two dozen more of Taka from various angles, in front of a microphone, on the amp, on the guitar, doing absolutely nothing, scratching his head, sleeping. “I was going to delete some of these,” Athena says, “the ones that are basically the same as others, but then Simon asked me to send all of them to him and I didn’t get around to it.”

“I can’t believe Prosecutor Blackquill’s pet bird is now a rock star,” Apollo mutters. “I can’t believe Gavin featured a bird on one of his songs.”

“Believe it!” Trucy says. “And since you talked through it, we will be listening again. Hey! Don’t walk away! Polly! Get back here!”

Apollo sighs.

“What are these papers?” Simon slowly lifts the offending stack from his desk, gingerly rifling through as though he expects a threat to spring from the pages.

“Reviews,” Klavier says, “of my new hit single. These are all the ones that said artistic or avant-garde. I highlighted every instance for you.”

Simon sets the papers back down and slowly shakes his head. “A question for you now,” Klavier says. “Is it you or Fräulein Cykes who runs Herr Taka’s insta?”

“She does.”

“I will have to apologize for her for being inundated with follower notifications.”

“What do you mean?”

“I tagged the account in my latest post.” Klavier holds his phone up to Simon, showing a picture of him with his guitar and Taka sitting on it, a microphone positioned in front of him. It was purely a photo-op that Athena wanted; I’m not going to accomplish anything with a bird on my guitar, ja? “So I imagine that several thousand of my followers, at least, have gone to follow Herr Taka.”

“Is he famous now?” Simon asks.

“Perhaps - if not yet, then soon.” Klavier glances at Taka asleep on his perch. “He is handling his rise to stardom very well, but he does have the best manager.”

“Would that be you?” Simon’s lips twitch in a smirk. “The most humble as well, I suppose.”

“Oh yes. I am very humble. You put enough dents in my ego on a daily basis for me not to be.” Klavier stops in the doorway and grins. “Enough that what Fräulein Cykes told me about your ringtone won’t go to my head.”

“She said what to you?”

“Ach, brushes with stardom make informants of the closest friends. It is nothing unusual for the celebrity world, that she sold you out.”

“She said what?” Simon repeats.

His phone rings, loudly, and he cannot lunge to silence it quickly enough. Klavier’s grin, impossibly, grows wider. He raises his phone in his hand, the screen showing that whoever he called has just hung up on him, and waves it. “It won’t go to my head,” he repeats. “It was not me, but the featured artist with me, ja?”

“Do you not have work to be doing, Gavin-dono?”

#ace attorney bullshit tag #klav's motive isn't purely spite - he genuinely thinks it's a fun idea - but he figures #that spite is definitely the reasoning that will get simon on board #runningwolf62 #roddy fanfics

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velvet-tread · 6 years

Text

Unfiltered 506 word fest because I can

I’m going to say this now before fandom burrows into my spinal column and puts me into an alkaline coma: that was p much everything I have ever wanted from an episode of the 100.

Literally every single fear I had about the show’s handling of various sensitive topics has been assauged. Whatever happens now…I mean there’s still time to fuck it up, I should never underestimate the show, but whatever happens now they’ve done the groundwork to do this right.

Let’s lance the boil first.

The Becho? Handled. That was wall-to-wall screaming of BELLAMY AND ECHO ARE IMPORTANT TO EACH OTHER.

Physically, emotionally, everything. They committed. *weeps* The show actually committed to a storyline rather than dancing around the edges and chickening out at the last minute. This may hurt to think about but Becho is REAL and when it DIES like a SUPANOVA it will MEAN STUFF. And that is WHAT WE WANT. It’s what we SHOULD want if we want a story that makes us feel things not an Insta story with a pretty filter.

And mannnn… just allow me to gush for a moment. 506 gave us so many nods to Bellamy and Echo’s evolution over the course of the show. The show has not forgotten their history and I am so glad – it does nobody justice to erase the past. And it gives credence to the scale of Bellamy’s forgiveness and character development. It makes it REAL.

Octavia screaming all of Echo’s sins at Bellamy, and Bellamy just NOT having it and reminding her of her own sins? Gold. GOLD.

I can’t scream about how intensely I love Echo because tbh its late and we’d be here forever but anyone who puts a flash drive in an open wound is a mf badass. And can we just agree that all the theories about Becho being secret, Echo being “just a love interest” and Echo not having an established relationship with Spacekru all got jossed? We can? Great.

Bellamy refusing to leave her? Echo refusing to let him die for her? Romantic. See above about conflict having meaning.

“We found each other in a cage, we can find each other again.”… I stfg that is one of the most romantic lines we have ever had on this show, and I know I say this approximately 4 x each day but I’m not ready for the agony.

And just so we’re clear: that love scene was SEXY AF. HOT DAMN PEOPLE. Take a chill pill and enjoy this aesthetic with me you’ll thank me later.

Talking of aesthetics: the Blake sibs sword fighting. *happy crying* Perfectly choreographed, perfect dialogue. Bellamy verbally skewers Cooper with a cutting riposte, Octavia skewers Bellamy with a Gina reference, Bellamy retaliates with a leg swipe and a walk out. Season 5 is the season of economical dialogue that knocks me dead.

(Over the hiatus I told some friends that if Gina got namedropped I’d do a thing that I’ve now forgotten so I’ll have to think of something appropriately commemorative.)

Bellamy SAYING HIS PIECE with Octavia. Finally. F I N A L L Y. I love Octavia, I love the Blake siblings and the prospect of them in conflict when Bellamy has enough self-love to actually challenge her is the kind of quality content that makes me tingle a lot I am here for.

Oh, and just fyi in case you hadn’t noticed. The show is giving us actual conversations, actual emotional beats. The Memori conversation did ACTUAL EMOTIONAL ANALYSIS EXCUSE ME WHILE I FREAK OUT. What is this show I don’t know her. It’s almost like they’re writing super smart scripts and people are putting it on television.

I hope Memori get to bang after they torture McCreary that seems appropriate. Perhaps they’ll make him listen to them dissecting their relationship piece by piece, with a test at the end and punishment by shock collar.

A genuine twist re Niylah and Gaia that I didn’t see coming and I am intrigued. I have long been passively meh about Niylah and actively meh about Gaia so this is an interesting development. I am ready to love batshit Gaia and get intensely creeped out by Wonkru cyborg Niylah *grabby hands*. Or the other way around. Just make me feel stuff.

Madi – god I cannot express how intensely I love Madi. Her awestruck “gross” when Clarke treats Octavia makes me want to paint her nails purple and teach her how to boulder. When I say Clarke Griffin is a babe, I don’t mean she’s hot (although she is) I mean she’s the coolest and I want to hang out with her. And Madi is a CLARKE GRIFFIN BABE-IN-TRAINING.

And she doesn’t always do as she’s told! I love her! She’s Octavia without the brat factor (i.e. Octavia without the life-long trauma).

You can tell that Jason has an actual daughter to model Madi on, because Madi is real af OK. Not only does she have a mind of her own and a get-shit-done mentality (thank you for that Mama! Clarke), she also loves and respects Clarke and listens to her. Clarke doesn’t parent with boundaries only…she’s a mentor. It’s so beautiful. The moment in the tent where Clarke is breaking the news about the Danger that comes with idolising a cult leader with red eye makeup? It brought actual mf tears to my eyes facts only.

And Clarke. CLARKE. My wonderful Clarke. Can we talk about that slow-mo run? Bisexual bob bobbing, eyes focused, Bellamy gawping out of shot. I MEAN. I ship Clarke with that bob (and fucking hell it is so hard not to talk about the bob without capping up to Bob). Clarke x Bob = endgame.

I am so enjoying this Clarke, guys. This Clarke is suddenly terrified of everything. Fearless Clarke Griffin. She’s terrified of Octavia, of Dioyza, of Bellamy and the gap between them, of WHATEVER THE HELL IS GOING ON RN. She’s so full of love and terrified of losing it and terrified of what lies ahead. And she’s YEARNING for what she can’t have. It’s so relatable and I have never been more invested in Clarke than I am right now.

BELLARKE ACTION pt 1 fuck me they broke down an actual door and suddenly a hole opened up in my life that can only be filled by an X Files Bellarke au

And like? Tree Adam’s score went HELLA SCI FI when Cooper walks out of that room. Can she squeeze under doors? Is there a red light blinking in her eyes? Can I get a space opera?

BELLARKE ACTION pt 2 – Clarke’s teary eyes while watchin Becho kiss HOLY CHRIST SHOW we’re really doing this huh.

BELLARKE ACTION pt 3+?? They are so obviously?? On the same team?? Still?? The angst?? Is around the fact that they don’t connect the way they used to?? They don’t understand each other as much?? The distance of time and people?? But they can’t help being on the same team?? Forever??? They’ll always have each other’s back???

Final miscellaneous thought: does Kane know Echo is an Azgeda spy? I thiiiink you do, my friend and if you snitch on my problematic panda we’re going to have a problem you and I.

There’s probably more and I KNOW I KNOW I FORGOT ABOUT ELIGIUS AND DIOYZA SORRY you cannot expect to me to focus with this level of nudity on my show.

#rach speaks #the 100 review #sort of #more of a sweary mess tbh #but i don't live tweet #so #the 100 #506

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enjhae · 6 years

Text

Double Exposure is a collaborative series that features the work of an admired artist.

LightLeaks second featured artist is Eva Mecham–a Vegas-based photographer who strives to represent women in an industry dominated by men. While the struggle to find respect always seems like a challenge, she continues her quest to become a respected photographer by practicing and perfecting her craft.

In this segment of Double Exposure, our aim is to support women, not just in photography but in every field where women are not represented fairly, respected or even paid enough in comparison to our male counterparts.

Eva and I interviewed each other to learn more about our love for photography, how our interest for photography originated, our influences and more.

EVA JACQUELINE MECHAM

Age: 23

DOB: 06/03/1994 Gemini

Background: Portuguese/Lao/German/French

Born: Las Vegas, NV

Raised: East Side Las Vegas

Insta Handles:

@spottiottieva was the first personal instagram I ever had but it became more technical to show ALL my work through.

…so I created the other two pages to serve as multiple outlets of exposure exuding different variable factors.

Humans AND Environment. Lol.

@sweetleaf_phto is female energy only and conceptual portraits/groupshots.

@jacqueline_images is my art and street photo page.

Why/how did get into photography?

My grandfather. He documented just about everything. He passed away in 2011 but his legacy lives on. He lived a life beyond what photos could show. His family traveled from Spain to America during the 1920’s. His determination, discipline, will, focus, and attention to detail rooted in me and allowed me to open my mind to the idea of collecting and acquiring but with tangibility and substance.

Past my grandfather stimulating my lifestyle choices I felt that spark after I developed my first roll of film. Being able to hold a photo in your hands is truly magic in the simplest form. Photos have influenced me my entire life. Keeps me constantly reverting back to instances and wishing I could save moments to time travel to. Just like music or a scent, a photo can greatly alter your perception or mood.

Last, a major reason I ever pushed my photography skills beyond documentation was skateboarding. I was at a young age when I fell more and more in love with every skate mag or video I ever watched. Naturally I began sourcing all my inspiration and tones through how the skateboarding industry plastered my brain. It’s common to have these wild kids throw themselves off staircases with ease and dive into 12ft deep drops every day. Whether it was filmed with thousand dollar equipment or the cheapest vx setup, A-1 quality images and content has always been around. It wasn’t until I learned real anticipation taking a pre meditated flick of a skater in motion performing a trick repeatedly without near success till maybe the 20th try in, that I understood the feeling of that equation. That 21st key shot is a high. All that focus.

What does your photos mainly consist /focus on? Why?

My photo collection is a mix of portraits of friends I’ve built connections or bridges with while the other half is a handful of my travels, daily life, and streets I walk through. I have to mention I LOVE ART of ANY kind. Art embodied within all forms. Especially if it doesn’t belong somewhere or a rule was broken to make or keep it there. I believe in the idea that the world truly is ours so exercising the freedom to express ourselves is common law to me. Almost like a personal passion project. On the other hand my favorite subject to photograph are literal human hands. I’m fascinated by hands. Our hands are such beautiful blessings that we often take for granted. With our hands we can touch, create, hurt, destroy, clean, whatever it be. Our hands are multifaceted and a huge relatable connection between us all as humans. No one hand is the same. Like our eyes, I feel they are also portals to the soul.

You are all about empowering women. How do you convey this in your work?

Confidence can be instilled in many ways but I have never seen more confidence instilled within a female more than when she enjoys a photo of herself. Living in this overly extroverted world, it’s common to find that most women compare themselves to everyone. Even men. I know this to be true because I can testify myself. I’ve grown up riddled with anxieties I’ve whispered to my inner conscience for so many years, without even realizing it. A photo can translate emotions and feelings you didn’t know you had. A virtual avenue. A portable capsule of what existed at that time. There is growth in a photo. People glorify in the beauty of a butterfly but fail to remember the stages of growth it took to become that butterfly we see. So for me to be able to capture the growth of is something one of a kind to me. Anyone or anything can have it’s photo taken. But it’s all about the subject. I stress to validate the women in my photos through our shared experience and what they represent passionately. Who are these women and how can I uniquely translate what they have made me feel through a mere photo for the world to perceive.

Talk about your experience collaborating on this project.

Norma! I’m extremely flattered you would have asked me to be a part of this project as it is so pure and beautiful. I love to share my thoughts and feelings and often feel I am overlooked and underestimated. Every once and awhile I meet someone who makes me feel human and included at the same time. I look up to you Norma as you are an incredibly vivid photographer with natural ability only acquired through patience, growth, focus, determination, and skill. I often wish we had met sooner. But there is a reason for everything and the influence you have provided has guided me quite a bit. I truly love Jelly and KNOW without a doubt that dog has a great soul. I’m lucky to have friends who aspire to create, as this will be so enjoyable in my older years to look back on and cherish as I fade.

Who is your fav photographer?

This is probably the hardest question you put on here but I’d have to say my grandfather.

Whose work has influenced your work the most?

I honestly wouldn’t be able to narrow it down but i enjoy and source my inspiration from lots of the lasting images of these timeless talents below….

Keegan Gibbs (so fucking fire)-

Atiba Jefferson (skateboarding essentials)

Mike O’Meally (classic skateboarding essentials)

Henry Chalfant (innumerable amounts of graffiti documentation)

Tobin Yelland (filmy skateboard shots)

Duran Levinson (insane portrait photographer)

Craig Stecyk (Z-town documenter/skateboarding essentials)

JR (graffiti/wheatpastephotographer)

Martha Cooper (80’s legend in street art journalism)

Alex Fakso (skate & graffiti essentials)

Ruedi One (for those wet blk&wht artsy street nights)

Ed Templeton (almost forgot this legend)

Nan Goldin (female legend)

Haris Nukem (vivid portrait photographer)

Ruth Orkin (female legend)

Who are you currently listening to, music-wise?

I have this private playlist I made myself I play every morning after I get up to get ready for the day. I’m revealing the first 3 songs but the rest is secret.

Rebel without a pause-Public Enemy.

Leaving Babylon-Sublime.

If 6 was 9-Jimi Hendrix.

Besides the essentials I‘ve been playing a lot of lo-fi hip hop beats/scratches/mixups while I work or create lately.

I usually have either an Alchemist or Madlib CD in my car stereo. I use a lot of CD’s and cassettes lol. Let’s just say my auxiliary option is variably unreliable so CD’s are solid lol.

What is your favorite photo you’ve taken and why?

I thought for so long on how to answer this. Haha. I have to say that every photo is my favorite. Not to feed the ego or anything but maybe in other words I’m a hoarder. Any and all photos I take fall into my collection and that to me is something that holds my life’s work and ultimate value. My archive. The best way to put this answer into perspective is the idea that I’m not done yet. I’m still constantly & avidly pursuing higher dimensions through photography, through life, through myself. For me to choose a favorite photo would be for me to say that I’ve reached some finished point. Don’t get me wrong I have favorited shots over others but like I said I love every photo I take because I love life.

Digital or film? Why?

Film is permanent. Technology isn’t built to last forever. You don’t need technology shooting film. Art in a post apocalyptic world is a priority. Creating something tangible is far more lasting to me. Especially one with an element of surprise.

A fixed restriction makes you think twice, I’m sure. Film is exactly that. Knowing you have that limited amount of shots, each one seems to count more. Film is a spectrum balance between a premeditated photo or a foggy moment in time. I’m a fast paced shooter but with shooting film I catch myself staring at nothing till I see something. Essentially, it’s something that actually slows me down and I need that.

Movie you’d recommend an aspiring photographer to watch for inspo.

Recommendation for inspo for an aspiring photographer hmmmm!

I’d say watch any Tim Burton film. That’s a given. I’m a major fan ofTim Burton’s movies and stories.

Then I’d say, Across the Universe and Inherent Vice. And after that watch some of Quentin Tarantino’s films. Those are all classic.

FEMALE POWUR PLAYLIST

https://open.spotify.com/user/normal_genes/playlist/351NQKgAj4lfzEnuamHKAm?si=V4TwoqWoQgWXME8Rzlzh1A

EVA PHOTO GALLERY

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NORMA JEAN ORTEGA aka NJ

Sign: Gemini

Background: Filipino American

Born: Las Vegas, NV

Being self-taught, how do you educate yourself on new ideas and techniques to take better pictures?

I can’t say I was self-taught because my dad was photographer. So I essentially grew up with the concept of photography. One of my first jobs was at this photo studio at Meadows Mall. I learned the basics in color balance, posing models and composition. College is where I got my formal training in photography. I learned how to shoot strictly in manuel when I took 3 years of black & white film photography and I became obsessed to say the least. Practicing photography in this manner gave me a sense of meaning behind the photos I took. I loved the idea of building a concept for the photos I had taken and embraced the idea of suspension and surprise.

But to answer your question, I learn new techniques by trail and error. Stick to one camera for a long period of time until I feel like I’ve mastered it then move on to the next. YouTube is also a thing. LOL. What is it that you want to say with your photographs, and how do you channel your work to illustrate that? Why? My personal photography documents moments and captures feelings that I like to look back on. A photo diary for the most part.

The subjects I touch on in my more serious work, aims to unpack what it means to be an Asian American female—of course from my own person experience. I express distressing feelings from my childhood, my feelings towards Asian stereotypes and dissect the standards of beauty in Asian culture.

When packing photo gear for a trip, what all do you take with you and why? My olympus stylus, fujifilm 400/800. A majority of the photos I take on a trip mimic the documentary style that I grew up with, however instead of focusing on people I try to focus on a moment and gut feeling that I am drawn to capture.

What motivates you to continue taking photos, whether it be socially, economically, politically, intellectually or emotionally? Everything is cathartic for me. It is a way to release a thought or feeling that I wouldn’t otherwise know how to express. Writing was my source of releasing this energy but through photography, I love how subjective it is to everyone else. You can share your work and get a complete different reaction or thought for what it was intended. But for me, when I look at my images, I know exactly how I felt and what I was struggling with at moment. It is somewhat of a reminder.

Within the aspect of women and social culture, what would you say is the difference between capturing beauty vs. vulgarity?

I think that what is considered vulgar for women is a popular theme in art, where artists are trying to breakdown that social norm for women. What was expected of women is being shattered by the “vulgar” images expressed by various female artists and photographers. It is essential, necessary and about fuckin’ time. To be lady-like was a standard put together by men and women are fully capable of conducting themselves however they see fit.

How did you develop an interest in photography and at what age were you?

Grew up around photography because of my dad. So I guess I always had an interest in photography. I grew up with a camera in my face and albums of albums of every major holiday and moment in my life. One of my first jobs was working in a photo studio called Photomania. Kids would go there to take their high school photos and basically trade them to each other like Pokemon cards. Hahah!

But working there was dope! I got to learn how to print from an old school printing machine. Had to clean that beast of a machine and take it apart every night. But I never took photography seriously until college. It’s when I finally learned about the greats (like Ansel Adams, Robert Frank, Cindy Sherman, and Weegee) that I completely got turned on to it.

Whose work has influenced you most, any favorites? Francesca Goodman, Nan Goldin, Ren Hang, Petra Collins, Carrie Mae Weems, Stanley Kubrick, Catherine Angel and Kimber Beck

When you are out shooting, how much of it is instinctual vs planned?

Half and half. And some times it’s completely spontaneous which is the best because when you feel that it’s the right moment, you just gotta go for it and pray that the photo comes out the way you wanted it to.

How has social media played a role in your photography?

It’s influenced me in the ways of curating my posts. Before, I just use to post whatever. But I think moving along the years of Instagram, I’ve seen how streamlined people can get with their style and feel of their photos. I also have my job to thank for that too.

While, I do curated my post, the work os still all mine. So I still see my Instagram as a photo journal but broken down into different segments.

What advice can you dish for any entry level photographers?

By a cheap camera and master it. Don’t buy into getting high quality gear until you find your style. Also, hang out with the local photographers you admire. You want to surround yourself with people who will push you to do better. A good piece of advice I learned from my cousin, Ez. Thanks cuh!

and of course i almost forgot….Talk about your experience collaborating on this project.

From our initial meeting at 6th & Franklin, I knew you we’re a go-getter! Actually, I hadn’t even met you yet but people we’re talking you up so hard that I was honestly intimidated. But real talk, I admire your constant drive to create work and your strive to improve your skills as a photographer. You are a walking and talking think-tank!

Doing this project was another project that I felt drawn to do, just like with my first Doublexposure guest, Andi. Everything I pursue in terms of interviews is purely for the need to connect with people who I admire. I am proud for what you stand for as an artist and I will support you every step of the way. Love ya girl 😘

NORMA JEAN PHOTO GALLERY

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Double Exposure: Featuring Eva Mecham Double Exposure is a collaborative series that features the work of an admired artist. LightLeaks second featured artist is…

#art #artists #blog #blogger #blogging #empowering women #equality #femalephotographers #feminism #film #film photography #friends #photography #women photographers #women supporting women #womens history month

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