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kyo-kris · 17 days

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Shigaraki Tomura x FTM Reader HEADCANONS

❥ Telling him that you're trans

Fluffy Headcanons.

Pronouns for reader: he/him

♡ You and him were having a chemistry, even if both never would dare to talk about this, and no one from L.o.V (except for Toga. Im sure she would shipp you and Tomura)

♡ Well, but when you noticed that you were liking him, you got nervous. So. Fucking. Nervous. You didn't know that they had a trans member in L.o.V and you were afraid of being just rejected or humiliated because of your gender.

♡ Well, you decided one night to open up to Twice about your gender, you were fucking SHAKING. Ending up discovering the trans member and that nobody gives a damn for what you identify yourself, as long as you are strong and help them, you will be respected.

➥ (If you don't like Twice, just imagine another member or you discovering by yourself that information) (pls who doesn't like him...)

♡ This information just relaxed you so much, and you just felt safe to talk about it to Shigaraki. But now how would you do it was the problem. He was always busy with his plans.

♡ But one day, you found your chance. Only him in living room, the others were outside doing different things. Doesn't matters. You took the advantage and courage (of course the courage of a few months thinking about this).

♡ You wasn't totally surprise because you knew about the member, but you hadn't seem any expression so genuinely like this. People tries to support or show that they support you, or they treat you differently (most time in a bad way). But this pookie? Nah. He was just "ok, and?"

♡ "W-what do you mean with 'ok, and?', you already knew it??" you asked with wide eyes, but at the same time you were so greatful for him not turn this a headache.

♡ "No? I mean, good for you, I'll keep calling you the same way as I always did." He said, same expression as if you just told him that you were going to sleep or something like that.

♡ "Thanks. I always feel like if I don't tell, the person will be mad or feel trapped. It happens more than I wish"

♡ "Trapped? What the fuck. Why would I?" You didn't know if was a rhetorical question or you had to answer it, but you just let a light laugh come out.

♡ "Is that all the reason you wanted to tell me you are trans?" He seemed to notice your nervous face.

♡ "Do you... Do you wanna go out with me sometime?" You felt your cheek burning like a fire "y-you don't have to accept, I was just wondering maybe we.. Uhm could-"

♡ "Yes" He coldly (or softly. You were too nervous to notice) said, turning his head away from your look.

♡ "What?" You heard it right?

♡ "Don't make me repeat myself" You thought maybe he was annoyed or impatient, but it wasn't, he was blushing as hell. And when you noticed, you made your way to tease

♡ "Whoa you're so red. Are you running a fever?" You tried your best to hold back your laugh

♡ "Im changing my mind!" His voice was slightly shaking, and you also noticed that, but decided to keep to yourself. It was just so cute seeing him like this!

♥︎ You could see a short smile on his face. Maybe you didn't need to be nervous at all. Everything went right.

Notes from Kyo ♡: Hello again! Well, my "I wanna feel safe and loved" is here, isn't? Two fluffy posts and the same character XD. Now you can suggest anything on my blog, can be anonymous too, feel free.

Here a list about what I do and what I don't:

#ftm reader #soft #shigaraki tomura #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #ftm safe #transgender #shigaraki tomura x ftm reader #x ftm reader #x male reader #sfw #league of villains

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cerseimikaelson · 1 month

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HIII CERSEI GUESS WHOS BACK (YOUR FELLOW WOTG FAN) WITH MY THOUGHTS ON COTG:

It is such a funny book, my fav jokes being the 'shrek, fiona, donkey' joke and an underrated classic in my mind, the scene where percy is like "There was screaming, crying and running in circles, and that was ✨just me✨" when talking about blanche's story (its so brutally honest and funny in a vulnerable way, which I will expand later on with the vulnerable part of it). It had so many iconic moments

It was a very low stakes, slow plot. You can tell Rick wrote it for the experience of reading our fav characters again (adding on to the fact that rick was made to write it by disney as additional marketing for the show, you can tell the plot wasnt thought of much), and ive seen people get mad over it, id love to know what you think!

This is a bit of a touchy topic. I've seen the people on the internet calling percabeth abusive with the constant name calling and the physical ??violence?? ( i obviously dont agree, but thats another topic), but something I've observed that everything that anti percabeths pointed out was toned down in the book?? Another post confirms that the majority of seaweed brains in the book was from percys pov and not annabeth actually saying it (like when hes looking at her expression and saying things like 'she looked like she was trying to say,....') and also when it comes to physical 'violence' (it feels so wrong to say bc i cant find another word lolol), the only things i found while rereading were 'lightly pinched my arm' and 'nudged me with her toe' which is wayyyy more toned down than ricks usual 'swatting my arm' or 'punching me' or 'judoflipped me'

One thing I admire so much about this book is the way he's written the characters vulnerability. percys way more open when he talks about crying whereas in the books its brushed over a lot, which is something the lovely @demigods-posts pointed out. annabeth tearing up when sally compliments her on something small like a cupcake, grover scared of percy and annabeth leaving him, and ofc percy. i saw someone interpret the river god scene as a ptsd induced panic attack, and i admire how rick has written it with so much angst, but still kept it light for the tone of the books.

another thing i love is how the characters dont revolve around percy as a main character (which is probably something rick learned while writing the tv show). annabeth has hobbies of her own, she's in her dream school, she is a busy woman and good for her. grover regularly goes to camp, and has his own conflicts with his gf and stuff. sally and paul are on their own arc with the baby on the way.

the fluff needs a special mention. every moment is so cute and sweet, there are way too many instances, especially with grover and percy which there was a severe lack of in hoo. them turning to seven year olds, percy and annabeths daily night iris message routine, the domesticity of the jacksons family

As usual, I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions too, im so happy i get to talk about it with you :))

Heyyy friend, how are you? Thanks for the ask!

Since you mentioned her, I LOVED Blanche. Iris is one of my favourite goddesses, so it was great seeing her. And I loved watching a god actually be ignored by their teenage child for once instead of the other way around. Blanche being a propel rebel with the monochrome was golden. (also, pink hummingbirds? lol)

It is obvious there wasn't much in terms of an actual plot with real structure, but it was fun and light-hearted and it does set the foundation for something in the future. Not all quests need to be high stakes, all-hands-on-deck, the world is coming undone. I liked watching the trio have semi normal lives (meeting up for smoothies after school) instead of constantly being on hero mode.

I genuinely had no clue people were upset about Percabeth's interaction in this. But seriously, violence? Did those people forget Annabeth judo-flipped Percy in New Rome, or was it okay then because it was a grand romantic gesture? How is punching someone in the arm to tell them they are being an idiot (provided you don't turn them black and blue of course) abuse? Percy and Annabeth are in a relationship, obviously they are going to be tactile with each other. Not to mention, people often nudge each other in real life and nobody shouts abuse then. I am rambling now but honestly this is the first I've heard of this and I have opinions.

I know Rick wrote the PG version, but can we talk about Zeus literally objectifying Ganymede at brunch and nobody but Hera (and Percy silently) batting an eye? Honestly, I am not a hardcore Zeus hater (although he is an a**hole) but the way Rick writes him he has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I officially volunteer to be Hera's divorce attorney.

I really liked the idea of Annabeth having a secret fan club and having dinner with Sally, Percy and Paul every night. That was excellent.

I am already brainstorming theories about what the third book is going to be. Does it matter that WOTG isn't even out yet? Absolutely not. I kind of want it to be about Athena because her interactions with Percy are always 10/10, but that probably won't happen.

Feel free to send me asks about your favourite gods and goddesses, any headcanons you may have or anything you wish to discuss about PJO. You can also find me on ao3!

#cerseimikaelson #percy jackson #percy jackson series #pjo fandom #the chalice of the gods #ask #greek mythology

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artsyunderstudy · 20 days

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An ask game for writers to procrastinate working on your WIP(s)

Thanks for tagging me @cutestkilla @ivelovedhimthroughworse @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @valeffelees @emeryhall @monbons @thewholelemon @whatevertheweather @aristocratic-otter @bookish-bogwitch @orange-peony @shrekgogurt @wellbelesbian @theearlgreymage @ic3-que3n - I definitely shouldn't be procrastinating writing because I'm overdue but I'm a sucker for a good Q&A.

1. 🦈Tell us the name of your/ one of your WIP(s):

I technically have a handful of WIPs I haven't given up on posting but I'm not actively working on. Après la Pluie, le Beau Temps is the one I'm actively working on. I'm in the planning stages with All the Lonely People which is a fic I'm planning to cowrite with @cutestkilla my beloved. Then I have Sober, Water Grey, Close Your Eyes, and A Mild Case of Madness (yes I haven't given up on AMCOM I was actually thinking I'd try and finish it up after I'm done posting Après)

I don't actually work on more than one fic at a time but I also had like a flood of ideas once I was done writing Someone Wicked and that's why the pile of WIPs. Also I was trying to do discovery writing and realized that I hate it.

2. 🍄Describe your WIP/one of your WIP(s) in the format of “___ + ___ =___”

Why is this so hard???

Okay. Um.

Roommates who (pretend to) hate each other + alcohol induced vulnerability = publicly getting off with each other on a stranger's couch in the middle of a rager, probably to the dulcet sounds of goosebumps by travis scott.

3. 🌍What tags or warnings will one of your WIP(s) need if you intend to share it?

Amazingly my current WIP doesn't really require much bracing. But I am still intending very much to complete Sober (working title) which I talked a lot about last year. That would come with warnings for grief, alcohol and sexual assault. Which makes it sound so much worse than it is, but then again I always think that my writing isnt actually that sad but then i have people telling me i ripped their heart out of their chest and chewed on it so im not a good judge of that. i will say it definitely has more jokes than my usual fare.

4. 🧭An alternative title to one of your WIP(s)?

I am very decisive when it comes to titles, so I genuinely cant think of anything. I guess Sober, because I'm not sure that's the right title for the fic because it's not about addiction. It's about drunken hookups (and like, definitely some alcohol as a coping mechanism but like, mostly just uni students partying and going too hard as they are wont to do) so I was thinking of making it longer like "Kiss Me When You're Sober" but I dunno. It's not even close to done so I don't have to decide yet.

5. ⚠️Which WIP you're most likely to finish or update next?

Après la Pluie, le Beau Temps is the fic I'm actively working on and I'm going to post this guy next come hell or high water. It's just taking me a while, I'm a bit burnt out. But things they will come.

6. 💾What is your document of your WIP/ a WIP called? (not the stories actual title but what you’ve saved it as)

All my documents are the fic titles so nothing really fun there.

7. 🖍Post Any sentence(s) from your WIP.

“If you’re going to do this, do you actually trust him? After everything he’s done to you. Everything you’ve done to each other.” I sigh. “I don’t know.” All the things I’ve always believed I hated about him feel different now, filtered through a new lens. His relentlessness, his sharp edges, his poise. The way he moves across the pitch, and plays his violin, sweet-toned and sorrowful. The singe of his magick. “I just … see him,” I say quietly. “And I know I want him. The way I’m supposed to.”

8. ♻️A scrapped idea for your current WIP.

I don't know, I don't think I've scrapped any ideas for this WIP yet? Actually, I think earlier on in the planning I had wanted to have Niall and Dev being absolutely gross with their PDA through the whole thing, but I ended up writing a completely different side-story for them that's genuinely a ton better. Basically, they were a gag, and now they have an actual arc.

9. 🤔What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

Gonna mirror Dre here, we have been planning a fic to cowrite but we both have other fanfic obligations to fulfill first, so it's a little bit on the backburner until we are both freed up. Again, to parrot her, it's a canonverse AU based on a movie we both adore, older (late 30's) strangers to lovers, a ghost story but in a cathartic way, not a scary way, developing relationship. We have a shared trello and I can't help but daydream about it. I am so very very eager to start working on it in earnest.

10. 🤡How many WIPS are you actively working on?

One, actively. Two if you count the fic with Dre which we occasionally can't help but get into long discussions about.

11. 🛠Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now?

I am currently writing a genre I've never written before which has just been a little daunting. As well as this first chapter has zero simon or baz, probably, and THAT is hard too. But it has to be that way. For the setup. It just means I'm having to learn how to write a lot of side characters in a way I haven't done before, like Niamh and Niall (since i have a bit of experience with agatha and dev)

12. ❤️Not a question, just a second Kudos to send.

Everyone deserves so many many kudos.

Tags! @hushed-chorus @run-for-chamo-miles @j-nipper-95 @noblecorgi @facewithoutheart and @stitchyqueer <3

#tag game #artsyfic

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mugentakeda · 2 months

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Do you have any fic recs similar to your take on iroh? Treating him as an actual character with some fucked up issues is SO much more fun!! I love him and I am chewing on your art

YES!!!!!!!! everytime i post about shithead iroh moments i get nervous someones gonna think i dont like him or im anti iroh or whatever but i genuinely honest to god think his less than savory past and personality traits ON TOP of the things about him that make him so beloved by the fandom makes him better. like yeah i love all parent characters that are just big softies but big softie parents that also are kinda (very much ) fucked up are even better. to ME. and i dont usually judge how good characters are on the basis of how good of a parent they are which is oddly something that a Lot of people do but. U wont find any of that on this blog which is also why i loveeeee ursa.

BUT I DIGRESS! here is my absolute favorite. its unfinished but what is there is still very loaded. digs in deep to iroh. gets pretty nitty gritty with it too. it changed how i see iroh and specifically season 1 iroh. it balances his b1 behavior with his later revealed status as a grand lotus MASTERFULLY, and puts his manipulative and cunning side on full display. might even make you mad at him a little bit

this one is less of a take on iroh as like. a general and a grand lotus and the war side of him and more of him as a father. its short and sad and i adore all of this authors fics involving iroh. it still shines a good light on the consequences of irohs own actions though because lu ten dying was literally his fault. the selfishness and the manic desperation that bleeds through this monologue is kind of scary but also is tragically beautiful.

ALSO these specific parts near the end of salvage were REALLY good. i feel like iroh is definitely the kind of guy that does a whole lot of backhanded comments as a way of patronizing without probably even realizing he does it?? i think a lot of people forget that what makes iroh being “changed” different from zuko is that zuko is still a child, and iroh is like. in his fifties or something. a whole LIFETIME of probably doing everything zuko did pre-redemption but far worse, and plenty times over. take how young azula is when ozai let her loose into the world into account. take the fact that iroh was already a general by the time he was sieging bss into account. im not gonna compare and contrast crimes here but i am trying to put weight onto how long iroh has been in the game. nasty shit like this is bound to still creep in the shadows of irohs mind and will definitely slip out sometimes.

and i know i keep bringing up that one unfinished super gnarly au fic that features azulon putting zuko into irohs care following irohs return to ba sing se (after ozai disgraced himself in requesting azulon give ozai the throne since iroh lost his only heir). hopefully one day ill find it because i hate to think the author deleted it or whatever . but out of all the fics that dig into irohs crimes id say this one does it the deepest while also SOMEHOW managing to make iroh sympathetic just by how sheerly pathetic and miserable he is the whole time. ONE DAY THOUGH. i pray that i will find it. because i have like over 200 pages of history on ao3 and i cant remember when exactly i read the fic so . searching for it has been kind of difficult but if i find it trust i will post it lol

#i know this isnt much but for some reason depicting iroh like this is kinda. Uncommon.#WHICH STINKS but whatever.#asks

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emeritus-fuckers · 28 days

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Hi, feel free to ignore. I don’t know why this is making me panic so much but I’m a writer and I write Sodo being called Sodo instead of Dewdrop, some ghost fans seem to be getting a little mad that he’s not being called Dewdrop and I was wondering why you decided to call him Sodo?

Im unfortunately a chronic people pleaser and this is kind of tearing me apart part, I’m so very confused.

(I admire you very much by the way rat for sticking to your own beliefs and Hc’s and not going against your beliefs to please one person you don’t even know through a screen)

hi!

i believe the reason people get pissy about sodo being called sodo and not dewdrop (bleh) is because the man behind the mask is called the sodomizer and even has a tattoo of the word on his stomach, which leads people to apparently lose their minds because "it's disrespectful" to him by "blurring the line between him and the character" which is just nonsense, honestly.

sodo started out as a bassist, which would make him a water ghoul, so he was named dewdrop because compared to the rest of the band at the time, he was relatively small.

however, he is now the main guitarist. a fire ghoul. i do not see how a fire ghoul would be called dewdrop.

it's even more silly when you realize that papa called sodo that (well, sodomizer, which sodo is a short form of) multiple times. hell, at my own ritual, we were yelling out sodo.

the people behind the ghouls masks are very much aware of what we call them. at least some of them (sodo, aether and phantom definitely) are and they have no problem with being called that. sodo reacts to being called sodo.

fun fact, there was also a discourse about how apparently he's uncomfortable with dewdrop, but from what i've read, it wasn't from him, it was just misinformation which spreads in the fandom at a ridiculously fast pace.

for me personally, there are a few reasons i chose sodo over dewdrop.

one, it's a fucking fire ghoul. i'm not calling a fire ghoul dewdrop.

two, i view switching elements as something similar to being trans. partially because i'm trans myself. calling him dewdrop feels to me like deadnaming him.

three, it's a bit similar to mary goore's pronouns for me. while mary can be a he/they or a they/them, calling mary goore a "he" makes me uncomfortable. calling sodo dewdrop also makes me uncomfortable.

and lastly, i just don't like the name, in all honesty.

in the end, i believe that what he's called will depend on your own opinions and maybe when you joined the fandom, but calling sodo anything other than sodo feels wrong to me, so i'm sticking with that. i do accept asks where he's called dewdrop, but i always call him sodo either way.

if people are getting mad at you for this and making you panic, inform them that this is your choice as a writer and they are free to leave whenever they fucking please. it's your art. as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, you should be free to do anything you please with it. and calling a character a different name isn't gonna hurt anyone, trust me.

the people getting pissed at you probably have nothing better to do with their time. if i can skip a post with sodo being called dewdrop and ignore a post with mary being called a "he", they can ignore your posts/fics if they don't like a name or a headcanon. and if they don't and they seek out drama over something so petty, their opinions aren't worth caring about.

i used to be a chronic people pleaser, too, back when i wrote fanfiction on wattpad. and let me tell you, it made me feel terrible. i was pushing out chapters and publishing pieces i didn't like because people liked them. i was genuinely convinced my work was bad because it made me feel bad to write it.

eventually i decided to let go, completely switched out a fanfic in a way that people hated but also made me much happier. it's your writing and your decisions. other people don't get to dictate that. i'm sticking with my own headcanons because it's my blog. i made this blog. i am the main writer. if you disagree with a headcanon, you can move past my blog and go read someone else's fanfiction.

the best piece of advice that i can offer you, anon, is to remember that you're one of the people you're supposed to please. and the only one that truly matters in the end. if you ever wanna talk about those things, send me an ask on my main and i'll dm you (non-mutuals can't dm me for personal reasons) so we can talk more.

people suck. have fun writing.

- nosferatu

#ask #anon #nosferatu's asks

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sweetblossoms · 1 year

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saw your post abt rapunzel manipulating tim in their convo and god hard agree it Is concerning that so many ppl didn't see it. also crazy to me that ppl are mad at tim and defending rapunzel, saying that they would have taken the book too because tim was being rude etc. to me it seemed that both tim the character and ally the player Wanted to believe that rapunzel wasn't part of the plan and was good but just kind of strange, and both are successfully fooled. tim absolutely fumbles the interaction and ally could have played things better, but rapunzel was so clearly in charge of the conversation, leading him into saying worse and worse things and putting his foot in his mouth while tim was genuinely trying to be nice. tim is awkward and blunt and eccentric with Everyone, it's weird that ppl are saying he was being singularly rude to her or patronizing her or that he deserved to get the book taken. that interaction was clumsy as hell and so many words could have been chosen better but tim so clearly was trying so hard to fix his initial fuck up and be friendly w her in the same weird way he talks to everyone. I don't see how ppl came out of that scene on her side even if tim was a little rude and unfortunate w his word choice, and it's concerning to see ppl being like "ha take that stupid old man!!" abt the book being taken + in defense of a character we met an episode and a half ago and who we have been told outright is an expert at deceiving people. the princesses are so so interesting as characters and the morals going on are complex and that's a whole different conversation, but I feel like no matter whether you love rapunzel or not, ppl should be able to recognize that she was manipulating tim in that moment and taking advantage of his trusting disposition. not trying to start discourse in your ask box ofc!!! I've just seen No One Else express discomfort w rapunzel in that scene

anon this ask has been living in my head rent free since you sent it, i've been stewing over how to respond because y e s. for context, check out this post to save discourse on main (this is about to be a long one of fan critic analysis, get your popcorn and settle in if you wanna read, this is the longest post i've ever made), im gonna put my thoughts and response under a read more, sososo many spoilers under the cut read at your own risk

These were all in the replies and tags and I want to reply to all of them bc they're all worthy of being talked about bc i feel like the majority of the fandom is almost scared to critique?? So like let's talk about it since nobody else seems to be taking this approach from what I can tell (thank you to you anon for being on my side as well as the rest of you who are screaming with me) I will begin by saying that my original post is not critiquing ally the player, or any of the other players. i understand that they were in that dome, filming a session of dungeons and dragons, and improv acting and roleplaying for many hours on end with back to back episodes. i kind of get ally and the rest of the table maybe just wanting to "hope for the best", especially ally as they are quite a "hope for the good in others" type of person. it's frustrating from a viewer perspective sure, but i totally dont blame anyone ever for making a "wrong" or "non-optimal" choice while playing a ttrpg, they just have the misfortune of being filmed while doing so. i myself have made tons of bag fumbles while playing dnd, even when i thought everything through ten times over. so anything i have said or will say forward isn't to put any shouldering on to the people playing these silly storybook characters, like, i Get It

What i do want to critique is the fan response, which is the more worrying one!!! like i said in my original post, i was surprised by my d20 watch buddy having a similar response to ally. the total "oh, maybe she's just quirky bc of the self isolation, maybe she's autism rep" approach. my friend, love her to death, is also one of those "sees the best in others and hope everyone is always aiming to be their best selves" type of person, very similar to ally. i came online after that episode expecting everybody on the fanbase level to be screaming with me in a "i told you so!!" way

instead. i came online and saw people just on the attack and the defense in absolutely skewed ways!! out of NOWHERE, all these fans have come on to post about how "tim was patronizing her, and thats why she stole the book" "wow i would have hated being called girly and honey as well" "wow these conversations really didnt go their way why was tim so mean to her :(" or the opposite of "rapunzel is the evilest person to ever exist bc xyz these princesses are evil villains" or "we need to protect these princesses bc they just didnt know any better uwu"

i feel like, on a fan level, me and you anon (+all these lovely folks in the notes of that post) were the only ones screaming "hold on, that is literally not the same media i just watched"

i've seen before a lot of people be like "wow, media literacy is at an all time low" and i never really understood that until i saw the reactions after that episode. as a fan or viewer watching any media, we have the privilege of seeing more about the media than the people who are creating it. that's the best joy of being a viewer, we get to sit back and spot those foreshadowing moments and bite our nails in suspense when the music goes creepy and see the artwork and overall, we have the privilege of catching vibes that maybe those acting in it do not. this leads to those bonding moments of "i told you so" "wow im biting my nails and pacing" "oh they're gonna REGRET that". and, an "oh my god no no no do not hug her she wants to take your book god now she's feeling you up with her hair she's looking for the book ROLL INITIATIVE!!!!". it leads to glorious moments of ~dramatic irony~, a literary term for literally when something is happening in a story and the readers can catch it, but the protagonist probably didnt bc they're not seeing the full picture. While watching, from my perspective, yeah it was frustrating to watch the player bag fumble turn after turn, but it's a game of dnd, they film so many back to back, they don't get the same experience as us. however.

brennan did a great job at dropping the foreshadowing, to the point of not even so much subtly foreshadowing, he DIRECTLY TOLD THEM rapunzel was a liar and uses her words as knives. like someone pointed out, the players even PAID for that information, with the golden bridle. by the time they met these princesses, they probably knew the most about rapunzel's true nature over all the other princesses, that she uses her charisma to her advantage. the players made their choice to do the diplomatic route, to split up and chat. ally did the right thing for picking rapunzel with tim's 19 charisma stat, it would have been charisma against charisma, and an even playing field for someone they have been explicitly told is a master of words and deceit.

as fans, we've seen these episodes edited and put back to back. clues are lined up in a row. was it frustrating to see ally playing tim in a naïve way? sure. but tim's been pretty naïve this whole time, so you could stack it up to a character choice. what's more frustrating is seeing the responses of viewers being blindsided by the book thieving and chalking it all up to "evil vs good" and rapunzel's choice shaking them to their cores.

by this point in the story, by the time you get to that episode, rapunzel already gave enough bad vibes with the talk of her charismatic deceits and with her hair everywhere spying on them. maybe that last one wasn't explicitly stated, but it was heavily implied to the point of gerard writing the plans on a note instead of wanting them said out loud by elody, a scene that happened way before tim's. by the time we see rapunzel get to the kitchen, she is INSTANTLY catty. someone described her on the post as "eldritch regina george" and. yes. exactly. eldritch regina george. from our privileged spot as a viewer, rapunzel comes in, puts on the fake smile, puts on her fake tone, and says "what are you doing in here? :)". she was already ready to fight timothy. that first sentence was hostile. she was OFFENDED and checking on tim to make sure mother goose wasn't counter-spying. i honestly didnt think that would have to have been explicitly stated, she was in attack mode and plastered the fake smile for a show so that she had the upperhand in the conversation that was about to happen. this is something that fans should have at least caught on to right off the bat, we've been explicitly told that she is fake more than she is honest for the sake of being a "performative person"

the conversation happens, and she starts becoming more verbally hostile. "i dont know, what SHOULD we do hehe. it's ruined now :)" "no use in crying over spilt milk *pours milk with hair on the floor with a smile* oh no :)" "...or if it was on purpose :/ :)" "why dont you go get a mop :)" "i chose to be charming :)"

every sentence she replied with was carefully chosen. as viewers, we can watch brennan's face in full clarity of intimidation. we can have the knowledge that has been provided to not trust rapunzel as she is a charismatic spy who has words for knives. in my opinion, even without those clues before now, her show that she put on in the kitchen should have been enough as is to show that she is acting maliciously and with hostility. the smile is there as to not incite physical violence on tim's part bc then it would make TIM look like the bad guy if he attacked first. by the time she goes in for the hug. im sorry. but ally the player should have caught that, the whole table should have caught that, and-more importantly-the fans should have caught that. we all watched the same thing. we have all been told the same information. to purposefully ignore all of the red flags just to pull a "well tim was kind of mean and patronizing, and rapunzel doesnt have social skills from being locked in a tower, i forgive her, wow i didnt see that coming" is absolutely *batshit*

the lack of people catching on is what concerns me. i've met TONS of people growing up (sorry here, im all for women's wrongs, but mainly cis-girls tbh) who act like rapunzel does. from middle school and high school bullies/mean girls. mean girls at college. from parents or teachers or bosses. from normal adults in my life. they always have the same tone and inflections in the same places. the same faces with the wrinkled nose. the same sickly sweet smile. brennan played rapunzel, a known manipulator, perfectly. to a T. he embodied it fully. people JUST LIKE RAPUNZEL walk amongst us every day. i can guarantee you that even these fans that didnt catch it have met people like rapunzel in their own lives.

rapunzel is a character yes, but she is a character that mimics a masterclass manipulator. she IS the mean girl, the regina george. it leaked out of her every word, tone, and inflection. every single thing told about her and shown was, in no world, some "uwu the sweet bean was locked in a tower and doesnt have social skills". that was her origin, her start point. just like sleeping beauty locked in a castle, snow locked in her coffin. rapunzel directly says "i chose to be charming. :)." she had her origin of no social skills, her sad origin of being locked in isolation in her tower, and said "this is my greatest flaw, so i am going to dedicate my life to improving this skill bc it's what stopping me from achieving my goals." she trained her social skills to be good. too good. so good that she hopes nobody will catch her sweet charming self in the act of malicious intentions. this. was. directly. stated.

it worries me on a psychological level of the fans. yes it shows a lack of media literacy, something is frustrating on a fan-to-fan level. it shows a lack of ability of critical thinking. it shows a lack of ability to participate in dramatic irony, a necessary literary device to instill tension into a horror campaign. but also, and to what is probably my main point in this novel long hot take: it has real world implications. mean girls like rapunzel are a guarantee in life. i'm sorry, but it's true. maybe the person acts differently, maybe they aren't as obvious or more obvious. but these people walk amongst us. they use the same tone and same cadence to their words. these manipulators see what they want, and devise a way to convince the person into giving them what they want. rapunzel did not use the Charm Person spell, or the Friendship spell. She used. her words. like a normal human being. and by doing so, we as the fans were able to catch on and should have had a moment of "RUN GOOSE, RUN AWAY, NO DONT LET HER HUG YOU". but instead, a lot of people turn a blind eye to these manipulators in their lives. they pull a "aw but they have a tragic backstory, they're just confused and need love :/" "they cant be THAT bad..." they see a sweet little smile on the face and an upticked tone of voice, and go "well, they're playing nice, so now i have to play nice bc otherwise im the bad guy here" which!!! you do not!!

this is exactly how manipulators worm their ways in, this is what ALLOWS manipulation to work in its various forms. it's how people get trapped in abusive relationships. it's how people get scammed. on a personal end, i lived a narcissistic manipulator for a long time growing up, and it was exhausting. once you could put down the rose colored glasses and see right through the act, you notice how every inch of their mannerisms are performative. everything they say and do comes with the caveat of them wanting something from you and are trying to butter you up in the meantime. if you catch and call onto it, they IMMEDIATELY turn on you, they sneer and retreat to their next target who it will fool. the cycle continues, the next target is selected.

on a fan level, if we as fans cannot play into dramatic irony as a practice, if we cannot exit our seats of mind to catch on to those "eldritch regina george" quirks at the bud in a piece of fictional media where the puzzle has been handed on a silver platter, then there is a l o t more work to be done on 1) general media literacy 2) ANY fandom perception on media and 3) general awareness of how to spot and deal with manipulators in real life. if you can't catch on to it in a silly fictional ttrpg media, how do you expect to catch on to it in real life? how many of these same fans are trapped in manipulative relationships around them? how many more will they fall for bc of the "oh no but they have tragic backstory so it's forgiven uwu"? as fans, you cant sit there in the same breath saying that tim was condescending to rapunzel and then follow it up with not noticing what was ACTUALLY happening in real time. if you wanna say that rapunzel was ALLOWED to be a manipulator because of her origin, what other manipulators are you defending in your real life? how many of these manipulators continue their tricks BECAUSE they know naïve people exist and will fall for it? how many have been enabled in the same cycle bc it worked on one so it'll work on the next?

i wish i had a fun way to conclude this absolutely massive chunk of fandom critique gibberish, but i just dont. i wish i could find a more comprehensive way to scream about this, so take this post as me SCREAMING about this, anon my dm's are open if we wanna rant some more

#i havent entered fandom discourse in awhile in ANY fandom but this one has been bothering me so fucking much #tldr anon my messages are open if you wanna scream with me some more #anon #ask #neevrafter spoilers #neverafter #d20 #dimension 20 #d20 spoilers

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krikeymate · 10 months

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Hope you’re going well!

(Im sending these as cute little happy things but let me know if im just creating more work for you to do!)

More hcs! (This is kind of a mix of all au’s)

Tara loves any type of sweets!

Sam is so athletic so she loves jogging and maybe hikes! She likes to take tara with her even though she knows it will probably end up with her carrying tara before they even reach the halfway point!

All of the core 4 play very rough with werewolf sam! I can see all of them trying the tackle the huge wolf!

Tara likes to take small walks outside and she always brings back flowers for sam! (they are actually weeds but sam doesn’t have the heart to tell her sister the truth 😭)

Mindy and chad were definitely intimated by sam in her wolf form at first.. they would bring her sticks and toys as peace offerings

I feel like sometimes Mindy would tell tara how hot her sister is just to piss her off (this one might not be right)

I saw your one post about how tara didn’t know how to swim… imagine tara still being timid being in deep waters after they teach her so the core 4 lets her sit on their shoulders so she can still have fun with them without being scared!

Little tara would glare and get mad when anyone got close to sam.. sam was with her all the time and tara would get jealous when someone else talked to her!

I LOVE YOUUU

These are wonderful and I'm happy to receive them!!!

Sam and Tara having a sweet tooth was genuinely one of the hardest things I had to talk about in Foster AU because I cannot relate at all lol. I feel like, given I've given Tara a chewing problem, she definitely likes hard-boiled sweets, lollipops, and fudge. Sam strikes me as a dark chocolate kinda person.

I'm loving the thought of Sam taking up things like hiking and rock climbing. Tara tries to go with her when she can, because she knows how happy the activities make Sam and she wants to be enthusiastic about the things Sam enjoys (and also because the idea of Sam going out alone to do potentially dangerous activities scares her)... but oh god it's the worst. She does her best, she throws herself at it with enthusiasm and grit, but she just cannot keep up. Some people would just tell her to stay home, to stop being a burden. Sam enjoys every moment of watching her sister force herself through it and carrying her the rest of the way. (She loves that she tries, how she keeps trying, just for her).

Little Tara absolutely brings back all the 'flowers' she can find for her sister whenever she goes out, because they're super pretty and she loves them! Sam never tells her they're weeds, but her mother does once when she sees her handing them to Sam. "They're ugly weeds girl, not flowers. Stop bringing trash into my home," she says. "Weeds are flowers too!" Sam spits back. "And they're my favourite," she promises Tara. They keep a vase of dandelions in their kitchen as adults.

In the same way that Tara is Sam's, Sam is Tara's. She does not share her sister. It's like being scowled at like a puppy, adorable and in no way threatening. She'll attach herself to Sam's leg and peer around her to glare at the other person taking Sam's attention away from her.

Werewolf Sam is prime wrestling real estate. She's so gentle with them, but she demands they wear thick clothes just in case when wrestling so she doesn't nip them too hard. The very idea of Chad holding out a stick to Sam as a peace offering is so fucking funny. He would be so serious about it, and Tara would be like "what the fuck are you doing... that's so racist, Chad, god!"

Tara reluctantly learns to swim, but she still hates the water. (Chad suggests armbands, and she pushes him under the water for that.) They'll all stay in the shallow water with Tara so she feels comfortable and can still enjoy it with them.

Mindy is a little shit so she absolutely flirts with Sam - who is oblivious - and raves about her to Tara. Who has to hear about her arms and her legs and her as- "oh my god Mindy please stop." Mindy does not stop. Chad begins to join in and she seriously reconsiders their relationship. She's mad she can't whine about their behaviour to Sam, because she does not want to start that conversation. She rats on them to their mom once, and is horrified to learn where they get it from when Martha goes on a 45-minute talk about beautiful women.

She hangs up the phone, and turns to Sam who has been giving her weird looks for the past 10 minutes. "Who was that?" she asks, confused, because Tara hates phone calls, and she was on it for ages. "Martha," Tara responds, a little dazed.

"What- uh, what were you talking about?" Sam's dreading the answer, because surely it's about her relationship with Chad. If it was marriage talk, Sam's going to start throwing fists. Tara is far too young for that sort of thing. Oh god, what if it's baby talk?!

"Women."

"Women?"

"Women."

#/mp #ask box #Scream #Sam Carpenter #Tara Carpenter #scream headcanon tags #WOAH DID YOU KNOW IF YOU HIGHLIGHT A WORD AND PRESS THE ' KEY IT PUTS IT AT EITHER END???? sorry. very exciting moment for me.

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moonjxsung · 2 months

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STAR IM DEVASTATED so i have a priv twt acc right w some irls and this stay from stayville req-ed me a long time ago and i was soooo happy that i was mutuals w someone from stayville and i THOUGHT everything between us was cool? but today they unfollowed me and removed me as a follower and im devastated i dunno why they did that :((( i don't think they had a problem w me saying nsfw stuff cuz they previously tweeted things like "cancelling someone over saying smth nsfw abt an adult is stupid" and also ive seen them interact w nsfw minsung posts so i dunno if me tweeting smth like "i wanna suck flxs cock sooooo bad" couldve made them wanna break the mutual??? i dmed them too and i was like "heyy is there a reason you don't wanna be moots w me anymore </3" and not even minutes later they turned off their message perms and im devastated. its STUPID bcs they'd barely interact w me Sure but it felt nice to have a stay be my friend on my priv twt that's usually just for my irls and i </3 it's ironic that they did that too bcs just earlier today (before they broke the mutual) i noticed that my followers went down (i have a very low amt already. like. 25. not even joking) and i tweeted "yall dont wanan be friends w me anymore </3" bcs like. my followers are QUITE LITERALLY only my irls + a skz writer so i was (i think rightfully??) alarmed that the number went down!!!! man im just Sad about it and SIIIGH i know i shouldnt care so much bcs at the end of the day they're just a person online but the least they could've done was dm me back and explain why and GHFSDDSJHFKJADDSDSAAAAA you get me!?!! also im sorry i dropped this on you randomly feel free to ignore LMAAOOAOAO can i be 💫 anon? thank yew <3

(Adding 💫 to the anon list!!! Also fun fact that’s my favorite emoji of all time. Slay)

I feel like I’m the LAST person who should be giving advice abt this bc one of my mutuals and a very good friend of mine who I’d been talking to every day randomly blocked me on everything this week after me literally being there to console this person for every little thing and playing into this pretend homoerotic friendship we had even though she was clearly looking for another boyfriend and would get mad if I even called another girl pretty (???) I wish nothing but the absolute best for her but like…. The double standard is WILD. to not provide closure to a months-long friendship is just genuinely a very mean spirited thing to do imo.

(If she’s reading this, best of luck with everything and I hope you know I cared for you a lot more than you think I did. I distanced myself because you were clearly looking for someone to fill a void in your life that I could simply not fulfill, and I didn’t want to lead you on, nor be kept around like I wasn’t allowed to talk to other girls either. Regardless, I hope you know I used to sleep with my phone on full volume in case you called, and I deleted a page worth of poetry in my notes app for you I meant to deliver on your birthday. I also deleted your number so I have zero way of contacting you, but I will always be here if you need me. Take care and I love you always, I hope you still see me when you look up at the moon)

It’s not the first time I’ve lost an internet friend to the magical world of blocking, but fortunately the attitude I’ve developed towards it is that none of this is real!!! These are people on the internet miles away you’ve never met irl and they have no real impact in your life whether they remain following you or not. I’ve lost internet friends nearly a decade ago that I don’t even remember anymore. Better ones will come along!!! Especially stays! This fandom has so many beautiful remarkable people who are actually worth following and they wouldn’t cut you off like that. Sending so many positive vibes your way and I KNOW that the universe will send you some better mutuals. In the meanwhile I will be your internet bestie and I would never unfollow you for nsfw content or without some form of an explanation. And I also want to suck Felix’s dick. 🩷🫶

(I love you, don’t be so hard on yourself!!!! You’re wonderful, angel 🩷 anyone would be lucky to be moots with you)

#💫 anon #ask

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assmuncher27 · 5 months

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mainly directed to thesquirrelqueer so my bad that i start using “you” and “your” 💀💀💀💀but this is also clarifying stuff about the two river bootleg causs its getting fustrating

not trying to b a dick on purpose but oh my god this fandom is making me kinda insane. also really really respectfully (i mean this in the nicest way possible im not trying to start something) can thesquirrelqueer maybe think before making posts

they’ve blocked me on everything, so they probably wont see this, but i lowkey kinda dont care, i jus need to rant

anyway yea, i’ve noticed thesquirrelqueer had made a bunch of posts about me, in which they “debunk” my two river posts. when did i ever confidently claim these screenshots/videos were from a bootleg?? i do NOT have a two river bootleg, i made an entire post explaining i dont have a bootleg. i have tried to make it VERY clear i do not have one

((screenshot from one of my posts)) HEEAVY on the “if” and “did”

how did you even get the idea that i have a bootleg????? the pictures are not from any bootleg, you dont need to debunk anything bro jus ask me n i’ll tell you the source IF i know it💀 i get making a post linking the sources, that’s totally okay n useful!!!! but calling it a debunking post is insane causs what are you debunking bro

i didn’t know the source of the screenshots, at first, but instead of making an entire post basically calling me a liar to your rabid fans, why couldnt you have jus reached out to me in private🙁 or sent me an ask telling me where they’re from ?? or maybe, you could’ve posted that without indicating i was lying about something i never even said was true

you BLOCKED me on tiktok n on tumblr ((for no reason????? i dont even interact with you)) but continued to make posts about my account . i had people in my asks genuinely harassing me saying i’m a “lying fuck” + even telling me to “kys” etc which is WILD

I WAS NEVER TRYING TO PROVE I HAD A BOOTLEG BROOO😞😞😞😞 WHY WOULD YOU TELL PEOPLE THAT

i’m not even trying to find a bootleg anymore, i’ve discovered that one DOES exist but its not accessible .im not posting screenshots to find a bootleg, i’m jus posting them for fun . it says that in my bio thing, i deadass changed it the second i stopped searching for a bootleg which was months ago

you keep saying the images i post are “off” what does that even mean sorry but why are you speculating

i never said this, i never said the screenshots/ videos were proof of anything .i THOUGHT they were, at first, but i never CLAIMED anything

i would really appreciate it, if you didn’t make me look bad for trying to help find a bootleg of a musical. also if youre gonna block me dont ????? make posts about me ??????? especially posts that paint me in a bad light, thats so shitty?????? you’ve blocked me so i cant even defend myself under the posts. thats why im making an entire post rn

im sorry to everyone if this comes off as aggressive or unnecessary but i genuinely had people mad at me solely causs of the way thesquirrelqueer had worded their post . im pretty sure they have a lot of followers on tumblr (tiktok too) i feel like this should’ve been handled better, especially considering thesquirrelqueer is over 20 years old or something .please try to understand my frustration

its so irritating to put time into digging up all these two river pictures and videos, solely for the reason of showing the fandom, only to get accused of “something being off about this image” or “he’s lied that he’s actually found the bootleg” or “its ai generated” LIKE GUYS IM TRYING TO HELP???????? so annoying why did death threats get involved n shi

do what the musical is called PLEASE i beg you all

((also thesquirrelqueer do you actually have something against me causs i swear you made a passive aggressive video about my will roland one on tiktok, immediately after blocking me there))

#be more chill #bmc #bmc musical #be more chill musical

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fktonofwhatnow · 1 year

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She doesn’t rub it in her face. It’s not Feyre’s fault and nowhere did the book even mentioned that she’s rubbing it in her face. We’re reading from Nesta’s pov and her narrative is coated with self-loath and ofc that affects her viewpoint on Feyre. If you read closely, she respected Nesta’s wishes to be away even though she tried to reach out to her. Let’s also remember that their relationship is so strained built with hostility and lashing. (and Nesta also being unnecessarily cruel to Feyre in the past) so they prob don’t know what the other needs.

H A SEE I TOLD Y'ALL THAT YOU LIKE TO TELL ME IM WRONG !

Thanks for the ask :)

Ok so let's talk about this, then.

What I'm hearing is that this is a difference of interpretation. I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that you're wrong, bc to me it sounds like we just read the same book and came away from it with different opinions of what happened.

I'm saying that Feyre, and Rhysand too I guess, both hold themselves like they're better. I got the feeling that because Feyre and Rhysand have already "beaten" their PTSD and depression, they are better than everyone around them who still struggles with it. It was never mentioned, nobody ever said it with their own mouths to Nesta's face but that's what I felt was implied. Everyone around Nesta treats Feyre like she's better than Nesta because her symptoms of depression were not as severe, it's not outwardly spoken, but it is implied. It has the energy of someone telling you that you shouldn't be sad because someone else has had it worse, except it feels like everyone says that to Nesta, and then turns as Feyre's warm, depression-cured glow shines upon their faces while calling her a saint for enduring what she went through.

You said that Feyre and Nesta do not understand what the other needs. But here's the thing: Feyre has been through the exact same things that Nesta has. The Exact. Same. Things. The same things, the same feelings, the same depression, and you're telling me that there is not a single thing that Feyre could think of to help her sister through a remarkably harrowing time that she is all too familiar with? that shit made me want to claw my throat out. I would not wish my depression on my worst enemy.

"If you read closely-" no :)

"Feyre respects her wishes to be away-" so... you've never had that little voice in the back of your head tell you that you should go back and check - like, really check - on someone you just talked to because they seem like they're not ok? Oh? Just me? My dude, it takes so, so little to get people to talk about how bad they're feeling. Feyre did not want to try.

"Lets also remember-" I think i need to start adding something somewhere that says that everything I write here is my opinion, the same way that everything you wrote in this ask is your opinion. This is the way you read the book. I stated in my post that my rant was emotionally charged, I am not "misinterpreting" the book. This is how I read it, and I chose to be mad about it.

Anyways sorry i got a lil salty there, all this shit with Nesta made my blood boil tbh. It hit a lil to close to home so oof i guess

Genuinely, thanks for the ask, anon :) I hope you have the loveliest of days!

#anti acofas #anti sjm #anti sjms awful character writing #anti feyre #nesta archeron #anti acotar #anti rhysand

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seeingivy · 9 months

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hii!

im sorry for bothering you and i hope this is not offending, but i was just wondering when will you release labor of love? i miss satoru soo much and that series really hooked me up and i miss it too. i hope ur doing fine and im not trying to force you to write it, im just wondering. luv ya<3

hi anon! thank you for asking in such a respectful way, I truly really appreciate it. for interest of transparency, I most likely will not be continuing labor of love.

there's a few reasons, that i'll briefly address because I feel like I owe it to the people that were genuinely excited to read and support the story but also as a way to kind of assert my boundaries with my stories moving forward. none of this applies to you anon, but more to other people, because you really are one of like five people who have respectfully interacted with me about this story. i'll just use your ask as my way to address it, kind of a one and done if you will.

one thing I kind of love to do with my stories is like an insane amount of fan service. the last few chapters of my fic roommates that I wrote were just me trying to include all the little things people wanted - things that people had mentioned to me like I want him to kiss the scars, I want this taylor song mentioned, etc. etc. because I knew it would make people happy to read it and I loved the ideas.

that being said, the feedback I received about labor of love kind of turned me off from the story all together. I had multiple people asking me not to include angst (which was a major part of that story in particular), asking me to make them kiss early on (which I did even though that wasn't in my plan), then other people getting mad at me for rushing it (are we seeing a pattern) - it just kind of got to a point where I would go to write the chapter of the story and in the back of my mind get so frustrated/sad with it because I knew I would get a barrage of comments that would make me feel horrible.

and I know that criticism is normal and that this is a me problem and im the one who needs to fix myself, but really I started writing these stories as a way for me to kind of escape and enjoy myself from the normal stressors of life. as a raging people pleaser, my stories are the one place where I get to have control and see things work out the way I wanted. I don't want to take that away from my writing because some part of getting to control things the way I do is so healing for me personally, after things I've been through, and I don't want to be controlled into doing something I don't want ever again.

all in all, I kind of just lost all my drive for writing labor of love. i do want to write gojo fics in the future, and hope that people will be more receptive to it, and i do still write for gojo. another thing is a lot of anons just usually send me messages like right after I post something eren related usually that "omg you don't write for gojo anymore" or "I post too much about eren" which kind of just makes me guilty writing on here. it kind of got to a point where I fully had fics ready but I literally had to wait until I posted a gojo fic in the middle just so I wouldn't get comments like that.

in general, just be kinder to the writers on this app - me and others - because it can genuinely be discouraging and offputting to feel this way in the place I intended as a safe space for myself. and please don't take this as a message to not send me requests or ideas for stories that i'm writing, because I do really love them. just don't ask me to change the entire plot of my story or to delete a chapter I literally just posted because you didn't like it.

#ok #I do love you all also I hope you know that #just wanted to get it off my chest #asks!#ronnie talking to herself

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munv · 3 months

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So, this is gonna be a long one Gang😞🙏🏿 get a snack or something caus ya girl is going all out.

So i met him 2 years ago or so right, in school, but the thing is i got his number and discord and we started talkin right

Pretty normal. But we like fell off and stopped talking the next year

Last year was it he found my tiktok (probably through contacts if you know the settings) and he started liking and reposting every video from my account.

So I reposted, he reposted

If I liked it, he would like it. And at some point it went to him tryna @ me in videos

But let me describe his character first. Glasses, tall from my point of view (I just reached 5 feet despite my big age,) and he’s pretty closed off. He has close friends that are my friends if ykwim

So after a while my friends who have known him longer than me started realizing what was going on. It was all giggles and laughs with him you know, the usual when we talked about the videos he also reposted and liked.

Then it started being a constant thing, so I’d check my notifications and 89% of them would be him. We never really talk that much about it at school but whenever we had classes I would turn to look around the room and he was just staring at me, and this would go on for months or so.

I would be taking notes for review, and my friend who I’ll call “T” would tell me to turn around because he’s looking at our direction. Then around christmas, well before christmas or maybe a month before we started going back to messaging each other.

Then the messages would escalate to saying goodnight, and good morning first thing, then he would heart my messages. Then we got into a lil “argument” which was a foolish one I got to say but then he refused to respond

So i felt bad and started messaging my friend who he also knows (she doesn’t go to our school but a different one with my other two friends)

And she messaged him bout it caus homegirl does NOT play around and stands on absolute business. And maybe im buggin out because you guys know im mad delusional but like…I see him sitting closer to me in class. He’s always one seat away or sitting directly in front of me.

At one point he sat next to me and our class is pretty big, so I thought “oh, maybe it just feels lonely because he sits on the other side of the classroom and stuff”

My friends threatened to beat me up by the way because I wasn’t noticing the signs and kept making up excuses for it.

So back on topic, he messages me during class and I check my phone, and look up and he’s sitting there as if he didnt just send me a message.

Which I forgot to mention after the “argument” I sent him a whole apology because I genuinely didn’t want to mess up what we were building for all those months. I realized after a while hes the type of guy who would stop talking to you and piss you off if he was really reallyyy upset with you, but also realized he’s kinda petty.

And the message he sent was talking about how he didnt understand on why I was apologizing and stuff but he was willing to talk out on why I thought he was upset with me and solve the tension.

With a attached video he sent twice by the way that stated I was cute.

Seeing this, I threw my phone and quickly picked it up before anyone noticed. Caus he IS NOT THE TYPE TO SEND THIS😭😭 and my friends who have known him for wayyyy longer informed me its not something he actually does because that means he must has taken some actual interest.

Thing solved right? Well theres more

His guy friends started teasing us about it and asking “when is the wedding” and calling me by his last name. And almost everyone kept on saying we were dating.

Now I was gonna take the bus home, but I wanted time to myself with people I actually like, and from some itty bitty posts you guys would know my parents aren’t exactly the best. (They suck shit)

So for half of that week I would stay in another teachers classroom who we all love. (He’s amazing)

And mr boy trouble was there too, he was staying late for a reason I didn’t know. Maybe to get work done or smt

And our friends were there too, so mid conversation they would pop in and start teasing us.

Then ONE fateful day, he sent me a portion of our argument on screenshot, and I was like “is this his way of saying he’s upset?” So i asked him and he left me on seen

But he doesn’t like being left on seen, and in one of our conversations he spammed me non stop because he didn’t like it. So im sitting here like “ok, maybe he’s just being petty again because he’s that type of guy”

During all of this happening our friends kept pulling us aside and asking on a serious note if we liked each other, but I never knew his response on it but mine was that he gave me mixed feelings and mixed signals

Caus tell me how one minute he’s calling me cute and sending me videos of bouquets of roses saying “for you pookie <33” and calling me “his pookie” then the next minute he’s completely off the radar and nowhere to be seen

Which I understand he’s busy but he’s literally online and ignoring my messages until he sees fit. Then acts as if he’s mad at me

Now my friends are explaining he doesn’t do this to anyone else AGAIN so he either got a lil crush or bros doing some courting ritual im not aware of.

Now when I ignore him, he plays around with my stuff when I’m not looking and sits down near me as if it’s nobody’s business.

By the way, I’m learning I’m bad at eye contact because whenever we look at each other I’m the first the look away not even a second later. Im starting to think my friends are right and I’m whipped the more I’m typing this crap out man😭

So he goes back to sending me videos and sending messages but when I decide on a good day to respond, he refuses to respond properly. Which is our biggest problem because he sucks at communication.

And my friend gives me a portion on what he said to me, and the screenshot says stuff like “I really do care for her” which really surprised me since he also explained he was gonna try and improve how he looks for valentines

Which I already think he looks cute but ok

Now I send him cute videos, immediately after he reposts them which I find wild once AGAINN

But now he won’t communicate properly and I kinda feel like its my fault

Another thing to mention

He told me “nvm” last week when I asked what he exactly he wanted to talk abt specifically, yknow

About the whole argument thing where I thought he was upset. He messaged my friend about it by the way, saying that we were good now. So he probably thought the conversation wasn’t needed anymore.

But now im scared that MY mixed feelings are turning into “oh I think Im crushing on this guy mad hard” and now we both probably have each other whipped or its one sided.

Help. Me.

I talked to him yesterday on some video he sent and he was like “i send stuff to a bunch of girls but dont check messages”

Then like

What the heck was I man?

But the thing Is he cant pull for the life of him, how do I know this? If you knew him you would know

What do I do gang

#{-muxis writes #.maki talks #boy trouble #boy drama #situationships #i think its one #i have no clue anymore #oh so the love of god help me #girl therapy #girl things #i think i have a crush #i dont know anymore #send anons #im bawling #im so dumb help #like 😭😭😭#pep talk

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thegeminisage · 3 months

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tng update time and oooooh am i ever mad about it. tonight we watched "hero worship" and "violations."

hero worship: i wanted to like this episode. but, firstly, it's just yet more evidence why children should not be on starships. this has been bothering me the entire time i've watched this fucking show. i hope there aren't any kids on voyager or whatever because this is literally fucking killing me

secondly, i felt really weird about everyone just...going along with this kid's idea that he was an android. i feel like there's a way to be lenient of his trauma without reinforcing the delusion or whatever sorry ik that's not how you're supposed to say it. it just didn't seem like solid therapeutical practice is all. i will admit there was also some secondhand embarrassment watching this kid's impersonation of data but i think it COULD have been cute (which seems to be what they were going for) with a better execution

i DEFINITELY think data's interactions with him should have been supervised too, not because i don't love and trust data wholly but because he has this way of missing certain emotional cues. and while that isn't a problem in day-to-day life, like, that's just the way he is and i resent anyone who would make him feel like it's a bad way to be/there's something wrong with him because he is PERFECT the way he is!!! for someone who is so vulnerable i think that data could accidentally do harm where it isn't intended (almost did a couple of times!), and data wouldn't be happy about that either because of course it would never be his intention. like i LOVE episodes where we just throw data into the deep end and let him figure it out, i love watching him go, but this is a child whose entire family/ship just DIED HORRIBLY who thinks he is responsible for the event. im not saying dont let data be his buddy data deserves so many buddies im just saying give data some INSTRUCTIONS at least. for both their sakes

anyway it was mid at best. it had a few good moments but ultimately not enough to salvage it for me

violations:

okay wait hold on i feel like i need to start a brand new text block for violations. you're only allowed 4000 characters per paragraph and i have stuff to say. i have Things To Get Off My Chest. please picture steam pouring from my fucking ears right now

actually forget the bullet list i don't need a bullet list this is not a normal liveblog Post. do you know every day i see threads on r*ddit and sometimes even tags here on tunglr dot edu about how people don't like tos because it's sexist. thats all well and fine and good. tos IS sexist. ARE WE SAYING TNG IS BETTER?????

tasha yar and the rape gangs. the naked time: 2! where both women got turned into insatiable sex object. deanna's impromptu and nonconsensual pregnancy. tasha's impregnantion by rape and her death at the hands of her rapist. that time they filmed deanna's feet. beverly crusher for all of season 1 having absolutely no personality outside of being a mother. lwaxana troi getting gang raped by ferengi for laughs. genuinely uhura on tos in the fucking 1960s got treated better than deanna troi on tng in the 1990s. yes tos has extremely bad moments sexism wise. JUSTICE for janice fucking rand. but truly how can you be as sexist against women when they aen't there. meanwhile, tng has women in every goddamn episode and all it takes is for one bad writer to

actually you know what is so funny. gene roddenberry and two women are credited with writing this episode. ALL of them are going to hell, gene roddenberry especially. i hate hate hate HATE his rape fetish. justice for janice rand AND tasha yar AND DEANNA TROI!

the thing about this episode is, it could have been good. there were good parts about it. for example: worf's joke about being probed. they knew what they were doing and it was hilarious. deanna getting to talk about her overbearing mother. riker's little speech to deanna when she was in the coma with literal tears in his eyes and this is a WHOLE separate rant but

my problem with tng is that you don't see them care about each other. we're TOLD that they care about each other. they SAY, "oh, x is worried about [character who's in danger this week]." but we almost never SEE them act it out. every once in awhile riker gets weirdly protective of picard, and worf seems kind of protective of everyone which i like, and picard also does a good righteous rage on behalf of others, but i don't usually get to SEE it. like when wesley goes missing or whatever he and his mom don't always immediately rush into each others arms on their reunion. when deanna passes out you don't always see riker abandon what he's doing and rush to her side. nobody asks "are you okay?" with genuine concern. and even when we DO get for example geordi driving himself crazy wondering what went wrong over data's fake death we don't get any follow-through - there's no reunion between geordi and data at the end the way there would be for kirk and spock.

BUT RIKER AT THE HOSPITAL BED. ohhh i was eating. it was so good. he wasn't even saying anything of merit but just the SIGHT of her passed out like that had him almost in tears. riker, who is the epitome of good humor and dealing with space horrors with laughter. IN TEARS. it was so good. a true show instead of tell moment. and in THIS fucking episode

my issue is: they had three on screen rape scenes. the first rape scene was extremely long. like they couldn't show anything explicit because this is 90s tv but it was VERY VERY LONG so it hardly seems to matter. and THAT was bad enough. but then they made us watch it AGAIN when he planted his dad's face in the memory and A THIRD TIME when he was like "ugh she's being so sweet to me even though i raped her i can't NOT rape her again." like at least that time she was able to hit him and get away but it feels like a hollow victory when he's already gotten away with it TWICE, AND!!! when worf had to come in and save her anyway at the end.

it was doubly horrible that he got away with the crime SO WELL that nobody suspected him - like, picard is out here asking deanna to let him into her mind a second time and she GOT RAPED. A SECOND TIME. deanna is like oh yeah you can come in! and it could have been a compelling mystery and plot twist to be like OH IT'S THE DAD but really it's the son except we SAW HIM DO IT the first time. there wasn't even any mystery to solve or anyone to suspect, he wasn't misdirecting US, we just got to watch him successfully misdirect this poor stupid naive trusting WOMAN

also, the thing about deanna's attack being a rape scene while riker's was someone dying under his command and beverly's was IDing her husband's dead body is that for riker and bev these are REAL THINGS THAT HAPPENED TO THEM. deanna never got raped by riker. like, he wouldn't do that and they wouldn't still be as close and comfortable with one another if he had. (i am mad on his behalf TWICE now that they left it open whether or not he committed that particular crime when every other piece of evidence says he wouldn't. the guy is not a closet serial rapist and leaving the endings open to be edgy is extremely poor form.) like, they literally JUST made deanna's attack a rape scene to sexualize her and feed roddenberry's fetish and HE'S DEAD. HE WAS DEAD WHEN THIS AIRED. HE CAN'T JERK OFF TO IT ANYMORE

they didn't even explain why that guy kept leaving people in comas. deanna i get because he was stalking her and wanted to fuck her but why riker? why beverly? that made it MORE suspicious. why all those other people on the other planets? was he raping every single one of them? how did he plan to keep going after he'd framed his dad for his crimes?

and it COULD HAVE BEEN GOOD. beverly's thing with IDing her husband's body was fun and terrifying. deanna could have gotten a memory that spoke to character development instead of being sexualized like this. in fact i think it was lowkey a pussy move not to deal with any of riker's close encounters because of the two of them riker is the one who has actually been raped! "someone died under my command" is generic and lame. but the way the telepathy worked was cool, the plot twist could have been cool, you could have felt real betrayal from liking this dude if he hadn't been all evil smiles from the beginning. and they dropped the ball SO HARD. and i could forgive them for doing that! i have given tng so many benefits of the doubt! BUT THREE RAPE SCENES IN 45 MINUTES?

the worst part is, there was no emotional resolution. they had that guy say the word rape out loud and then the credits rolled. deanna and riker didn't speak one word to each other. she was never like, i know you didn't actually rape me like that's not what happened. no one was like, beverly go have a hot drink and call your son. there's NO EMOTIONAL FOLLOWTHROUGH ON THIS SHOW. tos was guilty of that sometimes too but this level of it is fucking unreal

tng enjoyers im sorry for my meanie posts earlier. love who you love etc etc. i'm just. baffled. HOW IS THIS BETTER THAN TOS. at least what happened to janice rand (and uhura one time) was over quickly and didn't replay three FUCKING times!!! "tos is too/more sexist" I AM TURNING MY BRAIN INSIDE OUT TO TRY AND UNDERSTAND THIS FUCKING STATEMENT

#truly put the women back on the top shelf until you can treat them like they deserve. back to the boys club im begging you #sorry. i'm done now #personal #star trek blogging #tng lb #rape tw #uhhhh normally i say what we're watching tomorrow but i forgot already. and also idc <3 #justice for deanna fucking troi.

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getitoffyourchestofficial · 6 months

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hi this is a lot im sorry. i love to say words and dump shit that upsets me with no real correlation. my bad /gen (genuine) (idk if you know tone indicators im sorry ough)

you dont really Have to cook up a proper response to this i just need to put it somewhere where i wont immediately get piles of advice that i cant use. i know its well-meaning but ultimately the whole situation is ou of anyones control

(also putting this 🎪 here so i can try to find it later)

im stuck in a sisyphean nightmare of a weekly cycle: i have a good day -> my mood skyrockets -> i have a bad day -> my mood plummets -> rinse and repeat. at this point i think it might be a mental condition bc something doesnt even really have to Ruin My Day, i just have to face a minor inconvenience and then suddenly im all doom-and-gloom depression for 3-5 business days before springing back up as if nothing ever happened to do it all again. my mom says i might have bpd or bipolar disorder (i always get the two confused) because she has it and we just havent seen anyone about it, mostly because we dont have the money to see any doctors most of the time. i also kinda dont wanna have either of them? not in like an asshole way but in a these-people-face-stigma-that-i-dont-know-if-i-can-emotionally-handle way. in a im already queer and fat and poor and disabled in multipled ways and overall unsavory to neurotypicals/cishets/Default Settings way. yknow

todays inciting incident was a shitty shitty halloween carnival that didnt even have the thing i was excited for, didnt have any food, had lines that were miles long (hyperbole), was too hot, and i only got 8 shitty halloween things from -- half of which were lollipops, with half of those just being the same 2 flavors but Again. we stayed for 2 hours before my mom decided she didnt wanna be out of the house anymore as usual. i cant be too mad at her because shes mentally ill in the direction of "i dont want to go anywhere because my anxiety will spike" but unfortunately im mentally ill in the direction of "if i cannot leave the house to Do Things at my own pace at least once a week i will fall into a deep depression" so we clash pretty bad most of the time. this was also following multiple minor inconveniences mind you. and was also trailed by multiple minor inconveniences. it just has not gone well. this halloween is just shaping up to suck bc i was supposed to have a whole party but we had money issues so it had to be cut down to just 2 people for a sleepover, then one of them went out to see his grandma in another state and the other is apparently in the fucking hospital right now??? at least according to his posts. and i cant blame them for these either! schedules conflict and sometimes you go to the Fuckig Hosital. its out of anyones control but it still feels like shit. so its looking like my only shot at having any fun this halloween is the trunk-or-treat at my school and idk if im even allowed to go bc i had to drop out for mental health reasons and they told me i wasnt allowed on school grounds anymore. idk if that applies here. which btw. way to make a depressed kid feel worse. you can NEVER come to this high school again or we'll ARREST YOU. fuckin bullshit. BUT thats off topic the synopsis is that this halloween sucks so far and i dont really expect it to get better which extra sucks bc im turning 18 next year and i dont wanna let this be the last hurrah for my number one favorite holiday. i cant host fucking parties for my friends after then. im gonna be busy trying to fuck off to the other end of the country. i wont have TIME for it. idk. it sucks. this sucks. fuck art and fuck you /ref (reference) /nbh (nobody here)

Ik you don't want advice for this so I'll just put it on the blog.

And idk if you want it but here's a tea

☕

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autisticiyami · 4 months

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crazy? i was crazy once. they locked me in a room. a rubber room. a rubber room filled with rats. th

LISTEN TO MY AUTISM-INDUCED HEADCANONS BOY. i think about him a criminal amount i have his entire life planned out to fit with that ososan repainted idea i never did anything with that goes along with 80skun. do u see the vision. no? well ill show u. welcom to my freaking twisted evil mind. rant incoming.

also im gona be hopefully updating this semi-frequently as i draw more stuff and actually feel like explaining stuff. this post will be my Iyami Autism Diary now.

i dont have specific sources on any of these rn bc im writing this on my computer and also bc its probably something i saw once and didnt bother to save or anthing so. bear with me here.

-baby iyami. loveless child. born by a mother who always knew she would be better off without him and sharing the sibling moniker with an unironic sociopath older brother. emotionally neglected and naturally socially inept due to autism, along with like.. looking like that. you know he was torn to shred by everyone. japanese kids are RUTHLESS his entire elementary/middle school experience was getting his face dragged across the concrete and his lunch money stolen. i imagine he starts to become rlly jaded and outwardly mean as a defense mechanism in like 2nd/3rd grade, finally realizing that this shit isnt all sunshines and rainbows lil bro and that no one likes him. he went to school with both honkan and kaoru, honkan he would always get into scuffles with but kaoru was like the only kid that ever genuinely attempted to be nice to iyami. read: attempted. because iyami has bpd at the ripe age of 7 and a half and screams at him whenever hes around for no reason other than that hes really scared of him being a genuinely kind person. hes a fucked up kid in a fucked up situation surrounded by nothing but apathy and misunderstanding of how he works and thinks and wants. the scar on his face comes from an incident with his older brother who i imagine got so mad at him one time that he chased iyami around with a knife threatening to slit his throat open. luckily (or probably more unluckily) he just sliced the side of his face open. that was the first and last time that iyamis mother actually worried for him. and by "worried" i mean get mad at both of them for fucking around like that and then not taking iyami to get stitches because "he'd be fine."

-iyami's highschool experience is. slightly less horrific. mostly because hes kinda just accepted that everyone in the whole world hates him and at some point realized he should just live out of spite to piss everyone else off. he never really had any career dreams mostly since the only career he realistically could have was wage slave in the city, which would be like sending him to death row for him. due to his autism and prolonged abuse from all sides, hes become kind of an expert at knowing how people work, though he doesnt necessarily understand any of it. he realizes that he would much rather be a backpeddler on the streets than a corporate slave, so when hes kicked out at like 16/17 for being literally just a curseon his mother at that point hes right out there trying to charm his way into any way to make money. first couple years were difficult, i imagine he just. didnt finish highschool due to being homeless immediately. he always had a kickass sense of style though, and maybe bc he was younger he managed to pull off charm much more successfully. honestly i dont have too many any specific ideas ab this era sowwy... bc it kinda just exists as "the part before chibita" which speaking of

-his twenties and thirties is spent like the exact same way. like the autism is strong in this one hes very content with just being the worst. but thats only because he literally sees no other way for him to live because its all hes been offered to do by life. quite fucked up! but that leaves him with a great optimism and positive "nothing in life matters!!!!" attitude. i actuallyyyyy dont know exactly how to span this next part.... but i was thinking that he met chibita when the kid was around 6 and iyami was 30. iyami just kind of... adopts him? as a weird sort of nephew. but at the same time iyami is in a perpetual state of childishness so sometimes chibita is like the parent/uncle to iyami. theyre so strange. but speaking of iyamis childishness Yeah theres some side effects of prolonged neglect and trauma since first memory surprisingly!! iyami kind of aged backwards, having to mature early to try and protect himself and keep some level of sanity, he was never really treated like a kid especially not by mother and brother or even other kids. now that he's an actual adult his brain has sort of flipped over, now stuck in a weird area of feigning immaturity in every situation that isnt immediately "life-threatening" in his eyes. all that to say that iyami is agere and is basically regressed somewhat at all times and it just varies depending on the situation.

but yeah this era. a couple years after meeting chibita he ships himself off to the city suddenly hoping to be able to make something happen there Kind of an early mid-life crisis moment. and boy it is not great! this part is where i dump the rest of trauma on him but you dont get to hear that. something something tougou's crime ring. after like a bit under a year he ends up coming back and... HOLY FUCK IS THAT A REFERENCE TO THE FIRST EPISODE OF OSOMATSU-KUN 1988??? you bet your sorry ass it is. im literally so smart they shouldve hired me to make ososan dude.

-osokun '88 era happens ig?? his old situationship behated kaoru is a cop now apparently and he's stationed right in iyami territory. quite awkward! kaoru doesnt particularly like him 1 because like. cop/criminal dichotomy first of all. 2 because iyami was a cunt to him and honkan for seemingly no reason their entire childhood and 3 iyami seems to have a really weird complex of being mean and hating kaoru currently but also obviously going out of his way to get in kaoru's way. quite immature! i explained why that is though. kaoru in his infinite sweetnes though eventually just kinda feels bad for the dude because its kinda just pathetic at this point and also because he DOES know that iyami is actually a super cute sweet guy because there was one (1) time where as a kid iyami let his guard down around kaoru and played with him at his house after school just to be completely ripped to shreds literally and figuaratively by his classmates the next day when kaoru was acting super friendly with him and iyami just kinda blamed him for it for like 20 years. VERY pathetic! but he was like 9 dude. kaoru understands this and kinda just... lets iyami wreak havoc more than he would other people partly bc he still thinks hes pretty silly.

i have a whole big episode idea of the two getting together and probably hundreds of headcanons and ideas about the two together but tbh?? im gonna spare you and keep it as paraphrased as i can manage for both of our sanities. but watch me go back and edit this post or make a new one just infodumping ab everything about them.

but like yeah ig events happen. hey do u remember iyami's "daughter" who is actually his niece because there is no fucking way in any reality that this guy has procreated?? well she comes in sometime around here becasue her father (still an untreated aspd) kind of doesnt give a shit and neither does her whore mother and they choose to dump their kid off with uncle iyami for the summers now. yay!! i also have a lot of headcanons and stuff ab her (her name is hiyori btw) but thats for another post.

iyami's family turns into basically him, his husband, and his two (sometimes three) (some not actually legit) (and one is gone when it isnt the summer) neicephews. isnt that awsome??? i cry and scream and throw up just thinking about it. sometimes iyami is the nephew but thats awesome. sometimes a family can be some gay man and an orphan that is his husband's nephew and his husband's actual niece, his husband's lesbian best friend that is basically an aunt at this point, and his husband who is sometimes also his nephew/child because of cptsd and they are all autistic. truly beautiful stuff.

and yeah thats. that. like i said i'll be updating this with better explanations of stuff and hopefully actual art But this works for now!!!! no one wanted this but the world got it anyway. you can thank me later.

#my art #osomatsu kun #osomatsu kun 1989 #iyami #kaoiya #this might be my worst post yet #my headcanons #long post #like so long #lore dump #ig??#i dont actually care if anyone sees this btw #like i said its my diary now so idgaf!!

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