#i am so sorry for making you read a giant block of text that may not have even helped you at all
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I love you chickens and offer two of my own. Do you have any advice on how to improve my backgrounds? I have a lot of trouble with flowers and other plants, like the purple hyacinths in the first drawings?
all your BAWKtobers are so cute I love them
!!!!!!!!!! I'm so glad you are enjoying BAWKtober! It is the highlight of my year. And my goodness, these are lovely! Your choice of colors are so nice to look at, they feel like a soft place to rest your eyes.
Honestly, backgrounds have always been something I myself struggle with, and I don't know if that makes me more or less qualified to offer advice, but I can pass on what I have found helpful for myself.
1.) Start with something you LOVE. Trying to draw something you struggle with can already flick the little task avoidant I Do Not Want To Do This switch in your brain, so we are going to stack as many positives against it as we can in an effort to get our mindset as far away from This Sucks and I'm Not Doing It zone as we can, so: Start with something you love.
Are you passionate about nature and plants? Start practicing with nature backgrounds. Fascinated by roman architecture? We're gonna get drawing those pillars. Have a bunch of OCs that live in a fantasy setting and desperately want to be able to draw them interacting with the places you've imagined in your head? Get ready to get worldbuilding. If it's a subject you are already interested in it is going to feel significantly less like pulling teeth at the start than if you are stuck doing Boring Square House In 2 Point Linear Perspective (unless you love Boring Square House in 2 Point Linear Perspective, in which case, follow your heart).
I do this a lot with my BAWKtober drawings. I love drawing chickens and want to be able to have them interact in fun environments. The Chickens Part of the drawing are easy and familiar for me. It's something my brain is comfortable with. So I use it as a bit of a mental touchstone to keep myself skirting just shy of the This Sucks edge long enough to stay motivated on the background part of it.
Find your "Chickens."
2.) SIMPLIFY! Even complicated things are just many big and small shapes. Learn to break things down into their most basic shapes and use those as the building blocks to map out your background. Everything is Shape. Think Shape.
You don't have to get hung up on finer details right now. Those can come later. I did this with the rows of wheat field in my Harvest Moon prompt. Envisioned them as large blocks laid out next to each other. I mapped out shadows by darkening the sides away from the source of light (Big Ol' Moon Circle),
And after i got that base work i built off it with details (notice how you can still picture those shapes underneath it all). While this is by no means a Complicated background, the general method works for more intricate things too.
It's also helpful when trying to map out lights and darks. I do this a lot when I am trying to get a sense of depth and shadows for an environment:
Start with the really basic shapes. I like to imagine the background, middle ground, and foreground are all on different layers stacked atop each other facing the viewer (think those cut paper shadow boxes).
GENERALLY speaking, you are gonna have things closest to you be darker and more vibrant colored, and objects in the distance will be lighter and less saturated as they fade into the atmosphere. There are of course instances where this is not the case ( a background of a dense jungle or mouth of a cave may do the reverse, getting darker and darker the deeper you go, to show the lack of light and shadows that grow the further you venture from light) but it is a good rule of thumb when starting out, especially with landscapes.
Once you have that figured out, you can start slapping down more details~
3.) REFERENCES! I know everyone and their mother says this but it's true. The human eye and memory can be so, so faulty when trying to think back on how something looks. You might THINK you know, but when you try to sit down and draw it you sit there and have a 10min existential crisis (If you don't believe me, just try to draw a bicycle completely from memory. It's miserable).
So look at real things! Pay attention to the way your fav walking path curves over the hill on your walk home. Make note of how the distant skyscrapers on the outskirt of town fade into the soft pinks of the sunset much more the the stark, towering ones right outside your window. Look at cars and bushes spaced out in your local wal mart parking lot, take pictures of the flowers in your grandmother's window box. What's the simplest shape they can be broken down to and still be recognized? You are training your eye to see things in a new way and help you get good at positioning them in 3d space. Eventually, you will get better at this and won't need to reference things as often (but you always CAN. References are your friends!)
4.) Lastly, JUST DO IT!!!
JUST DO IT OH MY GOD JUST DO IT! JUST DRAW tHE BACKGROUND. I know, i know! It sucks and it's hard and it's not as fun as drawing the characters that you love and it might look bad at first but jUST DRAW IT BAD.
In the past i've spent so much time getting in my own damn way because I somehow get it in my head that there's some hidden knowledge or information or tutorial that i am missing, and if i wait until i Learn It i will finally understand the thing and Then i can go about learning it the "right way." Which is a wonderful way of shooting yourself in the foot before you even take a step.
It's really easy to get bogged down in the mindset of "i'm not good at this right now, so i have to wait til i Get Better so i can do it right" and this is Lies. This is the devil on your shoulder talking. This is the mind killer, and it is also a paradox. You want to get better at The Thing before you Do It, but you have to Do It to get Get Better. So you just do Nothing and then you feel bad 'cause you haven't moved anywhere.
So, just start trying. Pick something you love and let that carry you through the hard parts of the learning. Try not to care so much about how it looks at first. You are learning a new language, a visual one. If you get frustrated take a step back, or try drawing something else. Keep it simple, at least at first. And if you feel discouraged, remember i recently had a 10min existential crisis when i realized i couldn't remember how to draw an egg carton, which I see and hold in my hands every single day.
TL;DR DRAW IT BAD, BUT DRAW IT!
#i am so sorry for making you read a giant block of text that may not have even helped you at all#i don't usually do tutorials but i hope you find even a fragment of this helpful or relatable#everyone has their own method that works for them#the important thing is to just let yourself start somewhere and don't give up#backgrounds my beloved and belothed#backgrounds (affectionate and derogatory)#kenna answers#Makenna Made a Questionably Helpful Tutorial#chickens#tiny fluffy dinosaurs#the BEST animals#BAWKtober#asks#long post#demonicchicken1121
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fell a little behind, so today imma cover the extras in Trigun vol 2 - "Day In Day Out" and "Trigun Pilot" 😁
(NOTE: I'm reading the Dark Horse [physical] and the Overhaul [online] translations side-by-side)
after all the heaviness of ch8, depending on how you look at them, these extras are either a palate cleanser or they give you a bit of whiplash 😅 personally, I enjoy them. they're good fun, and it's interesting to compare these earlier Vashs with him at the end of vol 2. now, without further ado...
DAY IN DAY OUT
(Dark Horse on left, Overhaul on right)
just an interesting little translation discrepancy here - there aren't too many context-changing ones in these extras.
oh but I do love that both translations describe how early Vash wakes up (which, judging by the clock, is 4-5am so about the time Charlie gets me up for First Breakfast) the same way - "Earlier than the rooster's crow, children on Sunday, and the morning paper."
...ah yes, the Noman's Land rooster...
[[insert Trigun character recreating the "look at all those chickens!" vine but with toma here]]
Overhaul at it again, providing more context and clarity =u= although I do think both translations, while different, give off a similar vibe, pointing out little contradictions or things that seem counter-intuitive here.
(Dark Horse on top, Overhaul on bottom)
again, similar enough imo - but I enjoy the Overhaul's translation more bc it's sillier 💕
speaking of which...
...minor translation discrepancies here, but "All Days" VS "Oldies" is cracking me up bc I think I know how Dark Horse got what they did - it's a mistake/some confusion in what foreign (to Japan) word Nightow meant!
in Japanese, "imported" words tend to be written in katakana rather than hiragana. it's kind of like how, in American English, you might see "imported" words printed in italics in some books. anyway, I looked up the Japanese word for "Oldies" and it brought up オールディーズ (literally "oorudeiizu"). and here's the thing: there's no "dee" (like in "deer") sound in Japanese. to denote that in katakana for an "imported" word, then, you'd use the character デ ("de" like in "den") + the modifier ィ ("i" like in "eerie") + symbol to indicate an elongated vowel sound. hence, "oorudeiizu" - which I guess Dark Horse then mistook, thinking it meant "All Days"
(...but if that were the case, wouldn't it originally have to be "aarudeiizu"...? dgixgujgx I'm getting sidetracked, sorry - I am ① an anthropologist who ② took some Japanese classes way back when, so I got excited 😵💫)
ANYWAY.
......"Sonic Sodom" eh? I mean, alright! 😆
notable translation discrepancies, but either one does its job: makes this creep seem like more of an ass
now, the second extra...
TRIGUN PILOT
first page, first translation discrepancy. it's minor, but again, the Overhaul gives us more info. second panel, first block of text. Dark Horse has "Even if we're sheltered beneath a giant umbrella, we don't know what tomorrow may hold." meanwhile, the Overhaul has "Even if we're sheltered underneath an umbrella of our old technology, we don't know what the future holds."
there's another discrepancy on the second page, second block of text. more significant difference here. Dark Horse has:
Vash the Stampede is now known as a "localized disaster."
meanwhile, the Overhaul has:
Having caused massive amounts of destruction, he is now under suspicion of being the world's first "localized disaster."
lmao what an ass
and it's interesting how we see the kind of person Count Bostalk is right from the start...
and then we have Vash dancing in listening to his transistor radio. classic. 🤣
🤨
blegh. translation discrepancy that changes the context. I already liked this bandit guy, but the Overhaul makes me like him more. less "macho" more "I HAVE to take revenge for the heinous things Bostalk did"
the pilot does such a good job setting up the complexity of the conflicts in the Trigun 'verse 💕
and I don't like this one 😑 Dark Horse's translation here is...kinda jerk-like. condescending, kinda? anyway. let me sing another love song to you, Overhaul~
finally, I had to put these panels together. the translations are close enough, so no complaints there - the sass of this exchange just didn't hit me until now. Vash is such a lil shit and I love it 💕
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WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN INTERACTING WITH MY BLOG - Customizable Edition
BASICS !
Name / Alias: Ti
Pronouns: Any is fine with me. But default is they/them
Blog type: single muse | Multi-muse | non selective | semi selective | selective | mutuals only | private | other (temporarily mutuals only until i have more free time)
Type of muses: canon | OCs | both | other (specify)
GENERALITIES !
Triggers people MUST tag: nsfw. Animal abuse. Child abuse. Chain mail/messages.
Interest tracker / checker: I have it and it's mandatory | I have it, it's not mandatory but I'm more likely to follow back / interact with the people who fill it | I have one and I prefer it if people fill it in | I have it but it's to people whether to fill it or not | I don't have one | other (specify)
Reblog karma: I practice it | I practice it sometimes | I don't practice it | I always reblog memes from the source | indifferent | other (specify)
Rule passwords: I have one and it's mandatory | I have one and it's optional | I don't have one | I send passwords | don't sent passwords | [space for eventual additions / explanations]
3-5 ESSENTIAL RULES PEOPLE HAVE TO RESPECT
I can be slow on threads. My muse leads me to what they wanna reply to. Sometimes a thread has more of my attention and muse than others. I also work a job and have other hobbies. I won't always be here.
Please tag your NSFW, especially if it's an image. Please no fancy tags, just tag it simple nsfw or something easy. Having fancy ways to tag something that I CANNOT black list it, might get you unfollowed.
Do not send hate of any kind or spread hate of any kind. This can be with call outs, or reblogging things of 'every time this gets reblogged *insert person* dies.' It will get you unfollowed.
3-5 IMPORTANT PET PEEVES TO KEEP IN MIND
People who CONSTANTLY pester me for threads or telling me they replied (I am okay of course if I give you PERMISSION to tell me when you reply. I have one person I asked to tell me when they reply cuz their replies don't always show up on my blog.) I am fine if you ask me about a thread once in a while, but doing it every day or really constant will get you blocked.
Really bad grammar.. I don't mind mistakes, I make mistakes too in my writing. But if it's constant, I'm sorry I can't do it. It bothers me too much. I am WAY more lenient to people who's first language isn't English, but tbh, those people have WAY better grammar than people who is first language.
People who take art as icons and cannot say where they got them from (giving the artist credit.) I'm not saying you have to have a BIG ASS list on your blog of all the credit. But it someone asks who made your icon, please be able to tell the person the artist. Please be able to credit artists some how if asked. (The icons I didn't make I can say who made them when asked on Shigaraki.)
2-5 THINGS THAT WILL LEAD TO INSTANT (SOFT) HARD BLOCKING
I changed it to hard blocking. I do NOT soft block. I either unfollow or hard block. Unfollow = We can still RP together, it's just that your content on your blog bothers me. Hard block = I will no longer talk / RP with you.
Reblogging call outs. I want no drama on my dash, including call outs. Talk it out like adults instead of spreading rumors and bull shit. All y'all claim to be adults but you certainly don't act like it. I've seen my friends called out and everyone blocks them without asking for THEIR side of the story. So yeah, I want none of that on my dash or in general ANY drama. I admit if it's a few times you post drama, I am okay, I get you may need to vent. But if it's a constant thing, I'll hard block.
As stated above, really bad grammar and sentence structure. I cannot read run on sentences. It gives me a head ache. The same with GIANT blocks of texts-- no paragraphs just a big wall. I don't like that either.
People I just don't vibe with. If you give me bad vibes, I'll block you.
People who soft block me or block me, I will block in return.
2-5 THINGS THAT LEAD ME TO UNFOLLOW / SOFTBLOCK A MUTUAL / SOMEONE I INTERACT WITH
This kinda goes with the above mentioned...
People who post really long posts that are NOT RP. Like that color of the sky post. I hate it. Posting long posts that take me a few scrolls to get by might get you unfollowed.
Posting politics.
2-5 REASON YOU DON'T FOLLOW (BACK) SOMEONE
You are a personal blog or all it seems you post is musings and ooc. If I see NO RPs from you, I won't follow. I will also unfollow if I see no RP content from you. That being said, SOME personal blogs I DO follow, esp if they're a friend.
You are a bot / p0rn blog.
I just happened to miss you. It happens. If you RP I usually follow back. And if I don't follow you-- Just RP with me and I probably will notice I am not following you and follow. MY BLOG IS NOT MUTUALS ONLY.
tagged by: I yoinked
Tagging: YOU
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Okay, apparently my brain has nothing better to do, so I got a SINGLE prompt for ya. U ready?
...✨Living with the turtles✨
Rottmnt headcanon: living with the turtles
———
-living with the turtles is both fun and... not XD
-lets be really, Mikeys an early bird!
-you simply can’t sleep in past 8 there’s just no way
-Mikey wakes up every morning like it’s Christmas
-“there’s stuff to do today! You can’t be a slug and stay in bed! Move move move!”
-lots of jumping on your bed until you wake up
-usually everyone eating breakfast together is not a thing, as everyone is usually doing their own thing
-but if you cook anything you better be ready for all the turtles to ask for some
-you’re also now the honorary judge for literally every single competition
-need someone to judge who can do the best kick flip?
-you’re their human
-need someone to see who can balance more fridge items on your chin?
-there you are
-lots of working with splinter in that field
-you’re also the one who anyone else goes to for validation
-for some reason you can’t understand, they can never compliment each other’s work
-“hey I need you to look this over, tell me if there’s anything wrong with it, possibly-.”
-“compliment you about your work?”
-“well, if you insist.”
-will drag you to his lab or drag his lab work to you so you can admire it
-doesn’t matter if you’re reading or sleeping
-when he’s ready for you to see it then you’re ready to see it
-“it’s literally 1 am.”
-“come on get up I need you to compliment my work!”
-“alright just stop pulling on me!”
-as for GIVING attention he’s not very good at it
-he’ll try, that’s for sure
-but heaven knows he won’t compliment you to your face
-the only physical affection you receive is if he goes to you first for help
-“I only need you because I need you to hold these wires and you have more fingers than you know what to do with.”
-it’s not just Donnie though.
-it’s Mikey as well
-“look at what I drew!”
-“wow this is awesome! How long did it take?”
-“oh... about an hour?”
-“that’s really good!”
-“really?”
-will even ask you to put it on the fridge
-you give in and get a bulletin board in your room for him to pin all his work
-it’s covered with his drawings by the end of the week
-needs lots and lots of hugs
-randomly jumps on your back for a piggy back ride
-you gotta be ready for him at any given moment or else you’re both gonna end up on the floor
-and who could forget Leo
-not you that’s for sure
-he’s make sure you’d never forget he needed attention
-Leo’s definetely the type of guy to get ready to pull a stunt and dedicate it to you before doing it
-“for Y/n’s honor!”
-“Leo you’re gonna break you’re neck if you do that!”
-“it’s for your honor so it’s okay!”
-jumps out from every corner to scare you
-can never seem to get you to flinch
-this boy’s gonna get you to jump one day though
-don’t be surprised if he walks up next to you and just casually rests his elbow on your head or drapes an arm over your shoulder
-will randomly poke your side just to see you jump
-Raphs no better than his brothers in the attention department
-especially with weight lifting
-“5...6...7 *notices you walk in* 37...38...39...”
-he doesn’t go around giving affection like Leo and Mikey though
-his love language is helping with anything you need, such as as helping you reach a high shelf
-very comfortable just picking you up and moving you out of the way
-doesn’t matter if it’s to get you out of danger or if you’re blocking his way to the pizza that just arrived
-only responsible roommate out of the four
-only one that washes the dishes
-video games all the time
-you can’t live with the turtles without liking video games
-you and Mikey bake and cook all the snacks for video game night
-of course, Leo also has a rivalry with you
-not one like the old rivalry between Leo and Raph in other versions no no
-it’s the playful “hey wanna take me in hockey? I bet I’ll wiiiiinnnn~” or “I’m gonna best you at this and you’re gonna go crying to splinter!”
-winner gets bragging rights
- you also can’t live in the lair without being besties with April
-come on, she’s cool as hell!
-she’s the one you talk to about human problems or just complaining about the turtles in general
-nosey boys
-very very nosey
-there’s no way to have secrets in this lair
-you have a diary?
-expect Leo to go through it in one night
-you read fanfiction or write fanfiction?
-oh Donnies keeping tabs on each chapter
-he’s updated all your tech, he can definetely see what you look up and access it from his computer
-hey, living with them isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows
-you’ll always find Mikey in your room admiring any decorations or books
-he’s constantly borrowing your stuff and not asking
-Raph is probably the only one that understands personal space
-...unless it comes to him worrying about you when you leave the lair
-will text you all the time, asking if you’re okay, even if you’re just hanging with a friend or going to the store
-since they always invade your privacy, they always know if you aren’t feeling okay
-the moment you step foot in the lair they’re asking what happened
-and if you try to say there���s nothing wrong oh ho ho ho you’re in for it
-Donnie is pulling up articles, Mikey is bugging you, Leo is trying to activate his face man powers, and Raph is sitting in front of you and asking what’s up
- the only privacy invading they do that you actually enjoy is when you’re in your room at like, midnight, watching a movie
-you’ll be watching peacefully and then Mikey just appears in the doorway
-he’s got blankets and he’s got snacks
-you just wave him over and let him sit on your bed
-then Leo shows up, no offering other than his presence
-don’t bother trying to push him away he’s gonna watch that movie with you and Mikey even if it kills him
-once you three are settled, Donnie shows up with a movie projector so you don’t have to watch on a tiny phone
-he ends up staying, even though he denied that he would
-Raph shows up with pillows for everyone, the only turtle to actually ASK to join
-you can’t say no to the giant teddy bear
-you may have started off by yourself in your dark room but you ended in a giant cuddle puddle with your roommates
-sometimes though you don’t have time to hang out with them
-school
-school happens
-you have to deny them because of homework
-Mikey will help you with flash cards, decorating them so they’re fun and make learning interesting
-Donnie studies with you and probably knows the material better
-he’ll help you so it’ll be over faster
-Raph is simply your company
-he’ll sit quietly in your room and play relaxing music, offering any advice or comments he had
-Leo just tries to convince you to ignore it
-it’ll still be there tomorrow! As of right now, he needs you to watch the skating tournament with him
-once you’ve got everything done you’re immediately dragged into whatever shenanigans they’ve got going on
-you’re also the self appointed camera man, using your phone to capture every harebrained plan AND failure
-living with them isn’t always sunshine and rainbows, but it sure is never boring
Sorry this is all I got!
If anyone has any headcanon or oneshot requests send em my way!
#wattpad#fanfic#rottmnt mikey#rottmnt x reader#rottmnt raph#rottmnt oneshots#rottmnt leo#rottmnt imagine#rottmnt headcannons#rottmnt donnie#rott spoilers#rottmnt movie#tmnt fanfiction#tmnt x reader
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Drunk Texting Is(n’t) Bad for Your Health- Chapter Two
Series Summary: Talk about your unconventional meet-cute! Bucky receives a text by mistake requesting he prove he's not Reader's sister. The easy dialogue between Reader and Bucky sparks a natural friendship, but could it lead to more? Bucky still deems himself unworthy of any form of affection or love. Reader is hellbent to prove him wrong. With the help of some (meddling) friends along the way, Bucky may get his happily-ever-after after all.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word count: 2921
Warnings: bad language words, blink and you’ll miss the angst, just some fluff
A/N: divider credit- @firefly-graphics
DO NOT copy or replicate without my permission
You awoke with a start, feeling as if you were late for work or something important and forgot to set your alarm. Your heart beat an erratic tattoo against your ribcage. Scrambling for your cell phone, you blindly reached across the side table near your bed in a panic. Unplugging the phone, you brought the device an ungodly closeness to your face. It was only 6:17. On Saturday.
Your pulse throbbed behind your eyeballs, and a strange stickiness coated the inside of your mouth. Did you drink that much last night?
How could you not? Timmons was a fair boss, and you enjoyed your job, but that dude loved the sound of his own voice.
The quarterly business dinners were mandatory for all employees, even for the P.A.s. Typically, they weren’t so bad, but last night, Timmons felt the need to toot his own horn for landing a massive contract with Stark Industries slash The Avengers. He went on and on about how great it was for the firm.
He was like a giant kid in a candy store with his ramblings. ‘We will be promoting the face of The Avengers and everything that goes with it,’ he spouted off like the firm was god’s gift to public relations.
You groaned at the reminder of last night’s presentation. The contract wasn’t even in effect yet, and you were sick of the Earth’s Mightiest Heroes. Timmons could be a real buzz kill.
Rolling to your back, you brought your phone up to tap the screen to read the emails you received overnight. On display was a text from 11:04 by someone named James. It read: “Goodnight, (Y/N).”
Your mind went back to last night again, trying to recall who this James was. He must be significant if you plugged his contact information into your phone already. Had you met someone last night?
Drawing a blank, you clicked on the text bubble to pull up the thread. Briefly scanning through the numerous texts, everything came rushing back. In an attempt to text your sister, Robyn, you mistakenly texted this mysterious, James.
You felt like an utter buffoon when you learned he wasn’t Robyn. You always did have a way with the cute boys. Probably why you were single. You groaned out loud as you read on.
You im safely inside my apartment. Pretty sure no one followed me home
James Did you triple check the lock on the front door?
You yes dad yeesh
James There are a lot of bad people out there. Just want to make sure you’re safe.
You sounds like you watch the news too much but its sweet of u to care
James I know from experience.
You r u the bad guy or have u been the one mugged?
James Let’s just say I have friends that have dealt with the bad things of the world.
You right i almost forgot ur a military-trained assassin athlete mchottie
James Did you ever send your sister a text?
You shit thanks for reminding me i have such a crazy story to tell her
James Only good things, I hope.
You oh yeah all the good things an enigmatic yet handsome stranger cares more about my safety than any of my ex-boyfriends ever did.
James My ma raised me right.
You id say
James_ I hate to cut this short, but I think you need your rest. Especially if you’re meeting your sister tomorrow._
You i dont want to agree but ur probably right
You whats ur name btw?
James My name? Why? Do you plan to continue texting me after tonight?
You duh ur fun to talk to
James Oh.
You or not its cool if u dont want to
James It’s James.
You nice to meet u james im (y/n)
James Nice to meet you as well.
You my sister just texted me back and were still meeting at 9 i should go
You goodnite james
James Goodnight, (Y/N).
Oh. My. God. Had you seriously drunk-flirted with a stranger and offered to keep texting him? You had no shame with a few drinks in you.
You brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of your nose and sighed loudly.
What did you know of this James? He had a New York area phone number. Check. He could have been a real dick about your mistake but wasn’t. Understanding. Check. He worried about you getting home safely in your inebriated state. Caring. Check. Not too forthcoming with the nine to five. Secretive. Check. His mouth looked so soft and plush, and his eyes were made to drown in. Gorgeous. Check.
A heat simmered beneath your skin as you recounted the shortlist you’d made. Were you lusting over someone you’d exchanged less than forty texts with? Had you somehow woken back up in high school?
Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you stared at the screen displaying the message thread. Were you really considering this? You nodded your head to answer your own question. Where was the harm in a little shameless flirting? If worse came to worst, you could always block him.
With your mind made up, you began typing into your phone, constructing an apology.
You Good morning! First off, I want to apologize for the way I behaved over text last night.
You Though, I do like to imbibe in the occasional drink or two, I am, by no means, a lush.
You Please take everything I said with a grain of salt. Apparently, I get loose-lipped and cheeky with free wine. 😐
You Again, I’m sorry and understand if you wanted to cease our correspondence for my behavior.
You blew out a breath and tossed your phone aside. It was up to fate now and a stranger named James.
You laid in your bed for several minutes staring at the ceiling, contemplating between whether to send a ‘haha just kidding’ text and what the weather would be like, so you could forego shaving your legs in the shower today.
Your phone chimed during the pondering of hair removal, indicating a new text. You knew it was James proclaiming you a freak and to forget his number, but secretly, you hoped it was Robyn canceling today.
Seizing the phone from your mattress top, your heart’s beat increased with each second you went without looking at the screen. Finding the courage, you flipped the device over to read the message.
James Quite the formal apology, Ms. Professor.
You smiled at the text. It didn’t tell you to pound sand or eat shit. No, it was teasing and in jest. You sighed in relief.
You Cease our correspondence too much?
James No, no it was perfect if this was 1863, and you were breaking up with me via telegraph.
You Stop!
James Exactly! ‘Never speak to me again!’ Stop. ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ Stop.
A belly laugh disrupted the tranquil air of your bedroom. You quickly thumbed out a reply once you caught your breath.
You You’re incorrigible.
James I’m glad to see you are using proper capitalization and punctuation this morning.
You Ha!
You When you are buzzed and/or tipsy, capitals and periods be damned. Like you’re so perfect when you’re drunk.
James We all have our flaws.
Was he implying he was a sloppy texter when drunk, too? You shrugged it off as him being cryptic again.
You What are you doing up so early on a Saturday? I didn’t wake you, did I?
You were suddenly stricken with guilt. You should have waited for a more reasonable hour to send out rapid-fire apology texts. Not at 6:36 in the morning. You didn’t want last night’s behavior hanging over you, though. Better to clear the air now than later. You could always ask for forgiveness again if you had disturbed his sleep.
James I had just gotten back from my run when I saw your texts. I have training this morning.
You Oh, right. For your hush-hush, super top secret mission/quidditch game.
You You ever gonna tell me what you really do?
James_ Maybe. Someday._
How far away was someday? Was he planning to text you until you both died or until he got bored? How did texting relationships even work?
You Or is it one of those situations where if you told me you’d have to kill me?
James 😈
You There you go again--being all mysterious.
James Keep ‘em guessing and coming back for more.
You Has that strategy worked well for you in the past?
James Got you to text me again this morning, didn’t it?
You scoffed at what he had suggested. He was correct, but your stubborn streak would deny everything.
You The only reason I texted you this morning was to apologize for acting like a drunken fool last night.
And to squash the curiosity burning in your veins. But he didn’t need to know that.
James Oh.
The reply caused you to furrow your brow and your stomach to drop. You regretted not adding more levity to your last text. Of course, it wasn’t the only reason you were drawn to him.
You I appreciate that the selfie you sent wasn’t a dick pic. And you genuinely seemed to care about me getting home safely. Thank you.
You And maybe- a teeny, tiny bit- is honestly interested in getting to know you better.
You waited on pins and needles for his text, watching the pulsing ellipsis on your screen. Was he just humoring you?
James Hook. Line. Sinker.
Reading his response generated a flush from your jaw to your hairline. You growled in embarrassment. You fell for the oldest trick in the book. He baited you for a compassionate answer, and you delivered beautifully. Hook, line, and sinker, indeed.
You You’re an ass. I take everything back.
James Don’t be mad. I wasn’t sure how it was going to go, but you played into my trap wonderfully.
James If it makes you feel any better, all kidding aside, I want to get to know you better too.
James I fell asleep with a smile on my face last night and woke up with one this morning.
James Because of you, (Y/N).
A flutter broke apart in your chest. You hadn’t time-traveled back to high school; no, this was junior high territory.
You You’re lucky you’re so damn charming, James.
James Doll, you have no idea.
The subway ride into Manhattan usually gave you the chance to get a little reading in since it took nearly fifty minutes from Queens. Not today, though. You spent the entirety of the train ride texting back and forth with James. It was mundane stuff, but you were getting a grasp of who James was as a person.
You Favorite color?
James Black. You?
You Blue.
You Favorite ice cream flavor?
James Chocolate. Yours?
You Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia.
James I didn’t realize we were getting specific.
You We weren’t, but that’s my favorite.
You Favorite movie?
James I like the classics- The Wizard of Oz, It’s A Wonderful Life, Frankenstein.
You I have too many to list, so don’t ask.
You Okay. Lightning round because I’m almost to my stop.
James Where are you going again?
You paused your reply for a brief second, wondering if you should divulge your destination. You’d known James less than twenty-four hours; although, it felt like weeks after this morning. Where was the harm in telling him where you were meeting your sister? There were nearly nine million people in this city. There was no way you’d ever bump into each other.
You A bakery in the Upper East Side called Two Little Red Hens. Ever been?
James Don’t think I have.
You Well, since you like chocolate, they have a fantastic cake called Brooklyn Blackout. Super rich but delicious.
James Sounds right up my alley.
You Cats or dogs?
James I’m gone too much, so cats.
The answer piqued your interest. Maybe he was an athlete. Wouldn’t it be practice and not training, though? Or he’s FBI or CIA.
You Socks on or off for sleeping?
James Off.
You Silver or gold?
James Silver.
You Morning, noon, or night?
James Night.
You How do you take your coffee?
James Room for sugar and creamer.
You Boxers or briefs?
James Boxer briefs.
You laughed out loud, looking around the subway car to see if anyone was paying attention to you. Per usual, they weren’t.
You Touché.
As soon as the train stopped, you gathered your purse close to your body and made for the exit. You followed the crowd of fellow passengers through the turnstile and ascended the stairs onto street level.
The morning sunlight caressed your skin like a warm blanket. The humidity wasn’t too bad, yet, but the threat of afternoon thunderstorms still hung in the air.
Even with the reasonably early hour, the sidewalk was stuffed with people, carrying to-go coffee cups or shopping bags. You fought for your little spot of real estate on the grimy concrete.
Stopping at a red traffic light, waiting to cross, you typed out another question for James.
You Pineapple on pizza--yay or nay?
The light changed as you finished, and the throng of pedestrians around you guided you across the street. You spotted Robyn outside the bakery as your phone dinged with a new text alert.
“Wow, I’m surprised you made it on time,” Robyn said as you hugged hello.
You looked at the clock on your phone. 8:58. “You and me both, sister.” Glancing back at your phone’s screen, you giggled.
James What kind of monster puts pineapple on their pizza??
“What’s so funny?” Robyn asked as you accompanied her through the bakery’s door.
With a grin on your face, you punched out a quick reply:
You Well, it was nice knowing you, James. It was a swell friendship while it lasted--a whole 11 ½ hours.
Robyn elbowed you softly in the ribs with a look on her face, seeking an explanation.
“Ow,” you grunted. “What?”
“You tell me. I half expected a zombie to walk through the doors today after your text last night. Not Suzie Sunshine.”
You both edged closer to the counter as the line in front of you dwindled.
James Say it ain’t so, doll! Pineapple on pizza? Really??
You let out a low chortle as you skimmed the text. You glimpsed up at Robyn as you shuffled forward in line again. “Believe me, I’m pretty hungover,” you replied, shoving your phone in your back pocket. “It’s a funny story. I’ll tell you everything when we sit.”
Robyn stared at you warily, still trying to figure out what had come over you. “Okay,” she conceded, stepping to the register to order.
With each of you supplied with an iced coffee and a peach ginger scone, you found an empty table by a window along 2nd Avenue and proceeded to tell Robyn about James.
When you stopped to catch your breath, remembering the whirlwind the last twelve hours had been, you peered at your sister for her reaction.
She stared at you like you’d grown a second head. She shook her head in disbelief. “(Y/N), what where you thinking?”
Your brow pinched in confusion. Was she actually scolding you? You crossed your arms over your chest. “I was thinking about how my big sister is always telling me to meet new people and how it’s time I thought about settling down.”
“Not like this it’s not,” she hissed. “This is how your body parts end up in someone’s freezer!”
You choked on the piece of scone you shoved in your mouth before she started ridiculing you. After coughing to clear your airway and taking a sip of your iced coffee, you leered at Robyn. “Oh, my god! Dramatic much? Have you been binge-watching Dateline again? Jesus Christ, Robyn, he’s harmless,” you countered.
“You think you’ll be so careful, but you’ll let one little detail slip, and he’ll find you,” Robyn said before taking a pull from her coffee.
“You mean, like, how I was meeting you at Two Little Red Hens at nine o’clock?”
Robyn’s mouth popped open in an O. “What the hell, (Y/N)?” she stage-whispered. “Are you trying to get yourself kidnapped and sold into sex trafficking?”
“Please,” you drew out in one long syllable. “He doesn’t know what I look like. How would he snatch me?”
“He could look you up on Facebook.”
“Without a last name?” You shook your head, no.
“What about a reverse search on your number?” Robyn asked, pushing the plate holding her scone away. “That’s a thing.”
“Perhaps, but it seems like a lot of effort for a mistake I made. It wasn’t like he was seeking me or anyone else out.”
Robyn huffed out a breath and folded her arms in exasperation. Always the protective big sister. You could tell you were breaking her down, though.
“C’ mon, Robbie. It’s all in innocent fun. I’m not saying I’m hoping he’ll turn out to be Mr. Right, but the banter is fun,” you remarked. “James is charming and witty and nice to talk to.”
Robyn shook her head once more, frowning. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”
You reached across the table for her hand and squeezed gently. “Me too.” You smiled slyly, remembering last night’s dinner and Timmons gushing about The Avengers. “If not, I know how to get ahold of a couple of centenarians who know chivalry isn’t dead.”
Chapter One | Chapter Three
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#drunk texting is(n't) bad for your health#dtibfyh#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x you#bucky x reader#bucky x y/n#bucky x you#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky fanfiction#bucky fanfic#fanfiction#fanfic
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Lukanette June 2021 Day 26 - Do Not Disturb
Another for @lukanettejune
Thank you lovebug community for your support. Because of you lovely lovebugs I was encouraged to post this...I just hope it doesn’t suck too much I edited it a few times and it’s late...I just wanna post.
I think the alternate title for this fanfic is “The Laws of the ‘Do Not Disturb’ Sign,”
Also this may just be my first Alya salt...Then again a majority of my Miraculous fanfics are alternate universe where Alya is a much better friend.
But this fanfic still contains Alya being Alya. And if you can’t handle Alya being Alya (like I can’t!) then you may want to advert your eyes!
Also as you lovebugs may have suspected from my preview...There is a few instances of sexual innuendo...Nothing big enough for me to slap on the mature rating though...
So without further ado...
"What are Marinette and Luka doing?" Alya asked.
Marinette and Luka and all their friends were all vacationing at a resort. Alya and Nino decided to meet up with Marinette and Luka at their hotel room.
Although it is 9:30 in the morning, their hotel room door already has a "do not disturb" sign hanging on the doorknob.
Alya and Nino were absolutely bewildered.
"I know Luka and Marinette have a sickenly sweet romance, but this is ridiculous!" Nino said.
Alya was ready to disregard the sign and knock on the door, but Nino took her hand before she could knock.
"We should respect the rules of the sign," Nino said. He was a bit disturbed thinking about what Luka and Marinette could possibly be doing at this time of the day.
Alya was also ready to text them, but Nino encouraged her not to.
"They don't want to be disturbed Alya, I think that includes phones!" Nino said.
Alya ignored her and tried to call Marinette, but a revelation hit her like unexpected rainfall.
"Her phone is on 'do not disturb' too!" Alya cried.
"Must be serious," Nino said.
Alya sighed, and she and her boyfriend decided to leave, but she stopped for one moment to look back at the door.
"Well, we came to the resort to vacation, so they better not ditch us for the sake of wrecking a hotel room!" Alya cried, not caring if hotel guests passing by gave her slight side-eyes.
Nino placed his hand on his girlfriend's shoulder. "It could be anything, Alya."
But after two hours, their other friends started to wonder when Alya single-handedly told everyone. Marinette and Luka were still nowhere to be seen.
Adrien and Kagami started to stop by next, and the two of them stared at the door for a good 3 minutes, wondering just what on earth the two were up to.
"We should respect the law of the 'do not disturb' sign," Adrien said.
Kagami pouted slightly. "All of us are about to eat lunch. It would be strange if Marinette and Luka weren't present."
Adrien gave his girlfriend a worried look.
"A simple knock shouldn't hurt," Kagami said.
Adrien didn't feel like arguing because he did agree with her. He and the guys were already causing lots of fun mischief at the pool, and it wasn't the same without his best friend, Luka. And now Luka and Marinette were skipping out on lunch.
Kagami made a gentle but firm knock. 5 agonizing minutes passed as if nobody was inside.
"Nothing!" Kagami cried, slightly irked now.
But the sound of that knock was blocked out by the sound of Marinette's sewing machine. She was sewing many sun hats for some clients while her boyfriend Luka was helping whichever way he could.
Marinette wiped the sweat off her forehead, frustrated that she was given projects to work on the first day of the vacation but determined to finish the projects anyway.
Marinette smiled as her blue-haired boyfriend gave her some ice tea and a towel like a guardian angel.
"Pace yourself Marinette, you can always finish this tomorrow," Luka said. "I am sure our friends will understand…."
Marinette went to work making giant butterfly hair clips. "Luka, the reason I suggested putting 'do not disturb' on the door and on our phones was that I knew our friends would bug us."
"I know they love us, but this is an important matter, and I need to be away from everything right now and give my 110%..."
Marinette stood up and gave Luka a quick kiss on the cheek before returning to super gluing model butterflies on hair clips. "Except for you, of course."
Luka blushed.
"You have been amazing, absolute perfection, and I know I will finish these art projects by evening," Marinette said.
Luka smiled at her and sat on the bed, but Marinette took a moment to rub her stomach.
"Ok, I wish I was eating at the buffet with the others," Marinette grumbled.
Luka stood up. "I'll get you food, Marinette, and I will make sure to not catch anyone's attention."
Marinette smirked. "You would do that for me?"
Luka pulled his hood over his head. "You need food, or else you will faint. I'll get you whatever you want. Chinese food, pizza, sandwiches, anything!"
Before Luka got out the door, Marinette raised her hand.
"Wait! Take one of the wigs and one of the outfits before you go!" Marinette said.
Luka understood and took the long blonde wig and the purple tuxedo with sparkles on it. He figured none of his friends would recognize him in this attire.
Marinette took a moment to giggle before heading back to her work. "Perfect!"
Luka went into the bathroom, changed into the tuxedo, covered his blue hair with the blonde wig, and covered his blue eyes with black sunglasses.
Marinette had her eyes glued to her projects, but she heard her boyfriend's voice and was stunned to see he looked like a completely different person.
"Don't worry, Marinette, I'll bring back food as quickly as possible."
~~~~
Back at the resort pool Luka and Marinette's friends sat at a table eating lunch and were totally bewildered as to why Marinette and Luka weren't present. But they still had fun and knew they shouldn't stop having fun regardless of some people who would rather spend all their time in hotel rooms/
Kim looked like he desperately wanted to say something, but he held his tongue.
Adrien and Kagami ate snow cones but glanced at Kim for a moment.
Max used his high IQ to try to read him.
"You ok, bro?" Nino asked.
"Oh yes! I am doing great at a resort!" Kim said as he brought his drink glass to his face.
Juleka sighed as she ate her food. "Let's just leave them be, you guys! It is the law of the 'do not disturb' sign. Besides, my brother is in love! Give him a break!"
"You use that excuse every time Jule," Alya said.
"Yeah, Luka and Marinette must be having some serious fun in that hotel room," Kim blurted out.
Such a remark lead to multiple spit takes from his friends.
"Kim, why?!" Max cried.
Alix, on the other hand, smirked at the thought as she continued eating her parfait nonchalantly. "I'm not surprised. Good on the adorable couple!
Rose, Max, Nino, and Alya all did a spit take at once, and Kagami gave Kim a disgusted look while Adrien was just speechless.
"Sorry!" Kim cried, gritting his teeth.
Kim then frantically got out of his chair. "Y'know, I am just gonna go for another swim!"
Kim ran for the pool, but Nino stood up.
"Yeah, I hope you enjoy a water fight, Kim!" Nino cried as he ran after him.
Max stood up, "Wait for me!" He cried as he followed the boys.
Alya got out of her seat. "Kim, you will regret saying that!" She cried as she ran after the boys and dived into the pool.
The friends that still sat at the table went back to eating their food in silence. But now, Juleka was starting to become curious about the whereabouts of her brother and his girlfriend.
"They have to come out any moment now," Rose said as she sipped what was left of her strawberry smoothie.
Juleka placed her elbow on the table and rested her face on her hand. "Maybe they ran off somewhere by now."
Adrien was busy shifting in his seat, and Kagami looked to see what her boyfriend was staring at.
"Hey, look at that guy! He's got a nice tuxedo," Adrien said.
It was a bit strange for them to see a guy with much longer luscious blonde hair than Adrien and wearing a purple tuxedo with sparkles at a resort. His eyes were covered in sunglasses, and he was carrying multiple take-out bags.
"Hey, brother!" Adrien cried as he waved his hand.
That man in the tuxedo seemed a bit startled as Adrien called to him. Luka was afraid that Adrien saw right through his over-the-top disguise.
"Great tuxedo, brother! And you gotta teach me how you get your hair so shiny!" Adrien said.
Luka merely waved back and then walked away to avoid further interrogation.
After that, all of Adrien's friends turned to him.
"What? I admire a guy who could make his hair look good at the pool," Adrien said.
Kagami grabbed her boyfriend's arm and rested her head on his shoulder. "You're fine, dear! That man's hair looked like a doll's hair."
Everyone managed to laugh a little except Juleka, who couldn't shake this feeling.
~~~~
When the sun started to set, everyone was at their wit's end.
Alya was practically stomping to Luka and Marinette's room, and Kagami tried to calm her down, even if Kagami was a bit upset herself.
All of Marinette and Luka's friends stood in front of the door.
"So should we all knock," Alya asked.
Adrien and Nino were starting to regret being a part of this.
"Guys! The laws of the 'do not disturb' sign!" Nino cried.
"Yeah, maybe this is a bad idea," Adrien said sheepishly.
"But what if something bad happened?!" Alya cried, almost breaking the being quiet in the hallway rule.
Juleka bit her lip. "Maybe Alya is right.
Rose grabbed Juleka's arm. "Juleka, just because you watched a bunch of murder mysteries that happened in hotel rooms doesn't mean anything is wrong."
Regardless Juleka pulled a room key out of her bag. "I got an extra key."
Kim towered over everyone else. "Well, let's get Marinette and Luka out of there!"
Juleka walked in front of the door while everyone else waited in anticipation. She was starting to think maybe this wasn't such a good idea, but she was also paranoid that something terrible happened. So she quickly swiped the room key and gently pushed the door open to see a pile of Marinette-made crafts.
Juleka was the first to quietly step through the door, and then everyone heard what they thought was a moan.
"Now you did it, Juleka!" Max cried softly.
Guilt filled Juleka, but Alya walked in apologetically. Juleka tried to run after Alya as they passed the living area filled with hats and butterflies made by Marinette.
Alya was about to peek through the sleeping area.
"Alya, no!" Juleka cried softly.
But Alya ignored Juleka and lingered in the doorway.
"Aww!" Alya cried.
Juleka froze for a moment before shamefully peaked through the doorway as well. Luka and Marinette slept soundly on the hotel bed. Nothing suggestive at all. They were just napping.
Juleka admitted this was cute, but she tried to tug Alya's arm so they could leave, shut the door, and prevent any drama.
But in their smiling sleeping states, Marinette and Luka were starting to open their eyes.
Juleka and Alya both gritted their teeth as Marinette screamed.
"What are you two doing here?!" Marinette cried.
Alya and Juleka shared in their humiliation.
Luka managed to calm everyone down and call everyone to the hotel room like a council meeting.
Marinette paced around the room, rubbing her temple, visibly annoyed.
"I just wanted to get my projects done today, so I can spend the rest of the vacation without stressing out!" Marinette cried.
All her friends were mortified. They were all visibly regretful but felt any apologies would be moot after getting on Marinette's bad side.
"We wouldn't have bothered you, Marinette!" Alya cried.
Marinette gave Alya a sour look. "I don't believe you, Alya! I would be distracted even by text messages!"
After moments of remorse, Kim threw his hands up. "Well, at least everything is alright! No murder and no…." Kim paused. "Fun stuff!"
Alix and Rose couldn't help but cover their laughs with their hands.
Marinette rubbed her forehead again and threw her hands up. "Well, I am done now! But I think I need to spend the rest of the night with Luka because he stayed here and helped me the entire time, and breaking the laws of the 'do not disturb' sign are not easily forgiven!"
Everyone gave soft agreements. Luka smiled and wrapped his arm around Marinette. "Let's go out to dinner," Luka said, and through Marinette's aggravation, she managed to smile.
Juleka walked up to the couple. "I'm really sorry, you two. I used the extra key Luka gave me. I was just worried!" She handed the card key back to Luka. Although he pushed the card key back to her.
"Keep it. I left it with you for a reason, Jule," Luka said.
Juleka still felt guilty about this whole thing and clenched the door key in her hand, almost attempting to crush it to get back in Marinette's good graces. But Marinette didn't argue with her boyfriend's decision and seemed to calm down after letting her feelings out. Juleka felt it would hopefully be water under the bridge by tomorrow.
Kagami and Adrien walked up next.
"Just so you know, I had no part in this tomfoolery, and I wish you and Luka a pleasant evening, Marinette. But I hope you two will at least join us for lunch tomorrow," Kagami said.
Marinette smiled. "I will." And Marinette and Kagami gave each other a quick hug.
Adrien placed his hand behind his neck. "I understand you two were busy, and it's great you got those projects done. You two certainly missed out on a lot of fun, though."
"Heck! I tried to befriend a guy with long blonde hair and a tuxedo. I wonder if he was a Vegas performer or something."
Luka blushed in embarrassment, and Marinette giggled. The blue-haired man had to explain to Adrien that it was all just a disguise so he could get take-out and avoid distraction.
Adrien ended up having a good laugh which caused their other friends who witnessed Luka's disguise to laugh as well. Kagami looked like her sides were hurting as she leaned to her boyfriend's side, and Adrien placed his hand on her shoulder to keep her stable.
"Looks like you found your next concert outfit, big brother!" Juleka teased.
Luka sighed.
Adrien took a moment to place his hand on Luka's shoulder and smile.
"Maybe you should try dyeing your hair blonde one day, Luka." Adrien winked at his best friend. "Then you'll really be my brother."
Marinette threw her arms up again. "Alright, everyone! I love you all! Even you, Alya! But everyone, get out of the hotel room and let me eat dinner with my boyfriend!"
Everyone mutually agreed and said their goodbyes.
Luka then took Marinette's hand and smiled down at her. "Alright, now the vacation can officially begin." Marinette smiled back at her amazing boyfriend.
~~~~
When Marinette and Luka got back to their hotel room after dinner, Marinette let out some last vents while she took off her earrings and her coat.
"I swear, what did they think we were doing in the hotel room this entire time?!"
Luka didn't mind listening to his girlfriend vent. He laid on his side on the bed as she continued.
"I mean, we came here as a friend group! Of course, we wouldn't ignore everyone to spend all this time in a hotel room…."
Marinette paused for a moment and placed her fingers over her lips.
"...Oh."
Luka smirked as a selfish part of him wanted a little fun in the hotel room. It was a long day, and he could use a recharge too.
But this was a time for friends.
Luka got off the bed and placed his hands on Marinette's shoulders while bringing his lips to her ear.
"We can also plan another vacation in the future, just the two of us," he whispered.
Marinette blushed hard, and she could have sworn she almost bled from her nose at the thought.
"Well, um…" Marinette said.
"Hmm?" Luka said as he nuzzled her from behind.
"We told our friends this night was just for us," Marinette suggested as she gently pushed her index fingers together.
Luka lifted his head. "You mean…"
Marinette let go and headed for the bathroom. When she came out holding a bath bomb in hand, Luka smiled at her.
"I made this galaxy bath bomb, and I…." She paused, rolling the sparkling sapphire orb in her hands. "I would love to try it with you."
Marinette saw Luka's smile of approval, and she didn't waste time running back to the bathroom to run water in the tub. Humming one of Luka's romantic tunes.
Luka ran to the nightstand and quickly grabbed the "do not disturb" sign and excitedly placed it on the doorknob of their hotel room.
Thankfully none of their friends were asinine enough to disturb them that night.
Author’s Note: God...I was actually tempted to continue that. Marinette and Luka bathing in a tub of galaxy bath bomb...
But again I doubt I can write anything that intimate!
Anyways, I hope you lovebugs enjoyed this and...Jeez! We are approaching the last days of Lukanette June 2021 and I am getting really sad! :( This was my first theme month!
*sigh* Anyway, this is Emiko Gale and....Goodnight sleep tight! My beloved lovebugs!
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HDHSKWBS THANK YOU!! the drabble for the request was amazing!! since i may as well, i have yet another song for you!! this one is a bit more light hearted, so same rules as the last one, and make sure to have fun!! your song shall be “gimme love” by joji! again, thank you!! — 𓂉.
“Gimme Love”
Kuroo Tetsurō x Fem!Reader
Genre: Fluff, Angst
WC: 1.1k
Warnings: none
a/n: Hi my loves! This prompt kinda hit home for me in an unexpected way, since this is a pretty upbeat song. But I think the longer you listen, and the more you read the lyrics, the clearer it is that this song is actually pretty somber. That feeling of wanting love from your lover, but not vocalizing it. How we each want someone who can understand without needing words, someone who can sense that something is wrong, even if it’s not relayed verbally. We all just want to feel loved. And we want someone to notice that.
“Give me love. Even if I say I don’t need it or want it.”
5:30 AM. Wake up. Brush teeth, comb hair, a quick shave. Pull on a suit, sling a tie over the shoulders, grab an apple and the briefcase.
5:47 AM. Feed the dog, grab a coffee to go.
5:50 AM. Kiss her on the cheek, pull up the covers, slip out the door.
Kuroo Tetsurō was accustomed to this schedule. In fact, he appreciated it; it kept him sane.
It allowed him to take a glimpse, though a short one, at that angelic sleeping face of yours, all curled into the now-empty space where his body had been.
That was a sight only he was lucky enough to see.
On his early commute into the city, his mind wandered, as per usual, back to his cozy home, all things warm and tender, filled with love, filled with you.
Something ached deep inside him—that ugly beast rearing its head once again. He tried to shake the feeling, telling himself that he was only being selfish.
But he would be lying to himself if he said it wasn’t lonely.
-
You awoke to the cool, slick sensation of your two-year-old Siberian husky pup lapping eagerly at your cheek, the buzz of your alarm sounding at your bedside table.
“Morning Lola,” you grumbled, ruffling her marbled coat and stretching your limbs, sighing as you clambered out of bed.
Shuffling into the kitchen, you stifled a yawn, feeling around the countertop for your favorite mug.
Pouring yourself a cup of the lukewarm drink, you frowned slightly at the pot.
He made extra for me.
It had seemed that Kuroo was always the one that was taking care of you. His new job undertaking the majority of the financial burden of your living expenses while you finished off grad school. Waking up at the crack of dawn and somehow not making a single sound, slipping out of your arms and off to work. Absorbing all the stresses from your daily life like a giant sponge, never complaining about the burden of your emotions.
He seemed fine. Almost too fine.
It was as if he was always on. Always at the lab, always listening to you talk about your day, always making time for you, for friends.
Though he didn’t show it, you had assumed it was beginning to take some sort of toll on him.
You wondered if he was truly doing it for himself anymore. Did he feel weighed down by you, on top of work? Was there something he needed to get off of his chest?
Was he scared to confide in you?
-
6:43 PM. Pack your things, grab your overcoat, say your goodbyes.
6:47 PM. Take the elevator to the ground floor. Walk two blocks to the parking garage, start the engine.
The black SUV rolled its way out of the garage, turning onto the congested street as Kuroo found himself slipping back into his thoughts.
He sighed heavily, his back muscles relaxing into the red leather as he stared mindlessly out into traffic.
Could he even muster the courage to tell you? He knew how swamped you were; between work and your part-time job, you didn’t need the added stress of his futile thoughts. Knowing your personality, you’d drop everything to cater to him, which was something he did not want.
But what did he want?
He wasn’t exactly sure.
-
The sound of keys jangling in the lock at half-past seven was promptly followed by Lola’s excited barking as she scratched at the door.
“How’s my little girl?”
Kuroo’s voice was low, a bit raspy as he greeted the pup, bending down to scratch her lovingly behind the ears. Slipping out of his Oxford’s and making his way inside, he padded his way into the kitchen, where you were putting the finishing touches on dinner.
“Evening, my love.”
His arms found their way around your waist, his chin coming to rest at your collarbone as his body slumped against yours with a heavy exhale.
You smiled at his touch. Turning to face him, your lips brushed softly across his cheekbone as he nuzzled your cheek, humming as you leaned into him.
“Tired, baby?”
He shook his head, though the constant throbbing inside his skull said otherwise.
Dinner was delicious, as usual. You had a way of knowing exactly when to make his favorite comfort foods, the meal settling comfortably in his stomach to ease the pain of the day.
After sifting through emails and unread text messages, Kuroo placed his phone and glasses on the bedside table, blowing out the smoldering flame of the candle with a soft huff.
Reaching across the sheets, his fingers grasped a cold hand, a chuckle escaping his lips as you instinctively moved closer.
“You sure you’re alright?”
Your question hung in the darkness for a quiet moment before he answered.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m good.”
The voice inside screamed, clawing its way up his throat. “Can’t you hear me?”
“Ok.”
You were silent as he shifted, the mattress creaking beneath him. His back now faced you, blank and cold.
The bedframe squeaked once again.
Kuroo stiffened against you as you curled against his back, arms weaving around his torso, squeezing him tightly.
You placed a gentle kiss to his shoulder, finding your way into the crook of his neck.
“You’re not okay. Let it out, love.”
You had known. How could you not? This was the man you had spent half of your lifetime loving; you knew every nuance of his personality, the meaning of each expression, how his sighs sounded different when there was something weighing heavily on his chest.
His back shuddered against you, his entire body shaking as he tried to muffle his sobs, anguished whimpers escaping his lips as his bit down, hard, on his clenched fist.
He turned in your grip, instantly burying his tear-streaked face in your chest, letting the cries wrack his body as he bowed into your touch, allowing you to hold him.
Your hands clutched his agonizing form to you, one stroking the back of his head tenderly, the other rubbing gentle circles into the small of his back.
As his voice quieted, sobs turning to shaky breaths, you felt his body release the tension it had been holding, his muscles loosening into your hands.
“I’m sorry.” His voice was barely a whisper as he panted against your chest, his hot breaths tickling your skin.
“Look at me,” you ordered, softening your own voice.
As he tilted his face upwards to look at you, your expression melted, seeing the vulnerable expression that rested upon his features.
Cupping his cheeks, you tugged him towards you so his forehead lay against yours, his skin slightly sticky with sweat.
“You never have to apologize to me. Not for your feelings. Not for anything.”
“I love you. And I hear you.”
-
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I Like The Way You Move - Leonardo
A/N: This was something that started as a self-insert Mikey fuck but turned into a dom-ish Leo moment and I’m not sorry. (No that’s a lie, I am sorry that I never got my self-insert Mikey fuck)
Enjoy. Or not. IDC man, you control whether you read it or not.
Its smut.
Pairing: Leonardo x reader
Word: ~3100
You hitch your backpack so its sturdier on your shoulder as you approach the building your studio was renting space in, sending a quick text to Leo that you made it safe.
Not that you needed to. You knew he was watching you. Ever since you and him tipped into the 'we aren't together but we actually kind of are because I don't have eyes for anyone but you but neither of us have made an actual move yet because this is kind of like foreplay and its exciting' territory, you could feel his eyes on you everywhere you went. At home. At the gym. At your favorite shops. At the park. At work.
Everywhere.
And he was there as you weaved in and out of the people in the city as they rushed to get wherever they were going, watching as you slipped the key into the lock and went inside. Watching as you entered the fifth story room and waited for the other dancers to arrive.
He was always watching.
Guarding. Protecting. Treasuring.
You have never felt more safe in your life.
Even the rowdy construction men who hooted and whistled like the pigs they are whenever you passed by the construction zones down the block from the studio didn't register as a threat to you anymore, despite being triple your size and aggressive.
Leo was bigger. Leo was stronger. Leo would never let them harm you.
You sighed dreamily, feeling the stirrings of arousal pool low in your abdomen as you thought about him.
How he'd grip you tight against him to pull you from those who would try and take you from him. How his body would shield yours as he tore the hands off anyone who'd even think to touch you without permission. How he'd carry you away and check you over thoroughly to make sure you were unharmed....
The door opened, ripping you from your daydream, and Mila walked in, smiling at you and tossing her bag near yours. You made polite conversation until the rest of the students and Mr. Parker arrived, doing everything you can to try to ignore the wetness in your panties.
"Y/N," Mr. Parker calls once class is finished, motioning you over in the universally recognized signal for 'I need to speak to you.' You pull your baby blue sweater on - something you deliberately picked because you knew Leo would feel some type of way about seeing you in it - over your bodysuit and make your way over to him, making sure you are directly in front of the window.
"Yes?" you ask, tilting your head to side.
"I just wanted to congratulate you again on all your hard work," he smiled, green eyes squinting, "You are one of the most talented dancers I have ever taught and you deserve the role of Ella."
You beam under the praise, "Thank you sir. It means a lot."
"But," he exclaimed abruptly, "make sure you practice! You may be the perfect dancer but Ella is a powerful woman. Fierce! Confident! Sensual! She is more than just perfect landings and pirouettes! Her soul is one with her body!"
You promise, unable to keep the grin from your face. You had been cast as the lead character - Ella - in an new play created by a well-known playwright and it felt like all your hard work over the last few years was finally getting you some where as a professional dancer.
Mr. Parker rolls his eyes fondly as he ushered you out, "Bright and early tomorrow Y/N."
And you do come in bright and early. So early in fact, that it isn't even bright out and Leonardo hadn't even finished his patrol before you had left your apartment and there is no one at the studio and there wouldn't be for hours.
Which he wasn't too happy about but you couldn't be bothered to care when his message suggested your 'punishment' would not necessarily be something you wouldn't like. He kept it as vague as he possible could but the undertone of arousal and promises had you aching for the rest of the day.
Still, despite the wetness between your legs, you eventually manage to channel Ella in all her sensual glory. You can feel her energy, her passion, her elegance streamline into your very veins as you go through the routines. She envelopes you, guiding you until you are no longer alone in your body and you can feel her as deeply as you can feel yourself. There is a buzzing under your skin where she has settled and you feel warm all over.
You end the final routine with your knees splayed and head tossed back, forming an arc with your spine, gaze resting on a blank bit of ceiling as you try to regulate your breathing back to normal. There is sweat dripping down your body, sticking your bodysuit even closer to your skin.
So far gone into your head space as you were, you almost didn't realize that you were being applauded.
But when you did, you jumped, terrified. No one was supposed to be in the studio aside from you. You snap your head around, scrambling into a less vulnerable position off the hardwood floor, eyes zeroing on the intruder.
Leo's eyes are dangerously dark as he leans against the wall by the door, strong arms folded over his hard chest. His makeshift armor was gone but his weapons were placed on one of the chairs in the corner, suggesting he had been watching for a while.
"Leo!?" you question, voice no more than a whisper. He smirks, straightening up and making his way over to you until he was standing in front of you, blue eyes looking into yours.
The Ella inside of you nudges to the front of your brain, whispering 'Get closer.'
"What-what are you doing here?" you ask, leaning in to him a bit before you overthought it.
"I saw you through the window," he purred, "I wanted a closer look."
"O-oh."
He tilted his head down and for a brief moment you thought he was finally going to make the move. The move that will transform the current state of your relationship with him into the one that you both wanted.
"Keep going, lovely. I want to see it again," he murmurs, the faintest touch of his lips on yours as he does and your breath stutters, a whine bubbling and dying in your throat. You loved being called soft, feminine nicknames - it made you feel womanly and perfect and beautiful - and the timber of his voice molding around the world did wonderful things for you. His dark eyes roam over your face, licking his lips, before stepping back and taking his place by the back wall.
You turn back to the giant mirror, taking in your wanton appearance, the very visceral, physical effect he has on you obvious, and take a few deep breaths before calling Ella back to the forefront.
You start the routine over from the beginning, determined to give Leo a show. You ease into it like you would if you were alone. You were used to him watching you and the proximity of where he was didn't change how you felt about it. Besides, Ella was powerful and self-assured. She knew what she wanted and she takes it without hesitation.
With her at the helm, you felt like, maybe, you could too.
Landing on the bar after a high jump that has your thighs burning, you break the silence. "I like when you call me lovely. And sweetheart. And a good girl." You can see him in the reflection in the giant mirror, watching you shamelessly, and your body hums in pleasure.
His eyes narrow, smirk widening, "Do you now?"
"I do," you choke out, an admission, but suddenly Ella is gone and its just you now. The confidence is gone but its too late to take it back. Leo is on his feet and crowding you again, a hair's breath away and smelling way too good for it to be natural. He smells like man and strength and slowly dissolving restraint and you want to bury yourself in him.
"You like when I call you a good girl," he repeats calmly, eyeing the way your body is perched on the bar and putting his hands on your hips, "Then I guess you wouldn't mind is I called you 'my good girl' hmm? You want to be my good girl, lovely?"
A whimper rips from your lips before you can stop it and you nod desperately, no longer caring about anything aside from his hands on your body. He runs them over your legs before skirting back upwards and over your nipples through the bodysuit. Electricity fires through you at the touch, pushing back into his hands as he flits them over again.
"You like it when I touch you sweetheart?" he coos, catching you as you buckle, keeping you from collapsing onto the floor.
"Yes," you whine as he hoists you up like you weight nothing. With his mutant strength, you probably don't and the possibilities that the image of him holding you up invokes sends a thrill down your spine. He hums darkly, setting you on the ground, moving your hands to his shoulder to brace yourself so he could wiggle the bottom half of your bodysuit and leggings down.
A flash of insecurity floods over you as he tosses your clothes off to the side and grips you so your body is flush against his, fingers dancing along the edges of your soaked panties. Leo's face is set in stone, stoic aside from the darkness flashing in his eyes, and you worry that your body isn't what he wants. Maybe he doesn't like what he sees?
"I always new you were pretty, lovely," he grumbles, his fingers flexing and pulling at your body, encouraging you to press into him and grind into him. You could feel the bulge in his pants pressing into your mound and you try not to buck into it. "But this - you naked and needy and dripping - is so much prettier than I was ready for."
"I don't- I-I" you gasp as his hand trails down your back and grips your butt, spreading your cheeks wide and kneading the flesh.
"I'm a lucky turtle," he growls, voice somehow deeper and darker than before, "I see the way people look at you, princess. I see the way they move closer to you to get a better look or catch a whiff of your perfume. I see them watch you as you walk by, saying crude things about your body, your mouth. I see them want you. But they can't have you, can they?"
It takes you a minute to realize he wasn't asking a rhetorical question. "N-no Leo."
He hums approvingly, "And why is that honey?"
"B-because I'm your good girl?"
"That's right lovely. You are MY good girl. And you wouldn't look at any of them twice. Not when you have me at your beck and call. Not when you know I'll come running to you."
The impromptu confession of his devotion sent your skin buzzing and you could feel yourself calming down, the edge of desperation softening into a dull throb. This was more than sex. This was more than a game. This was a real connection bleeding into a different form of intimacy. He found you desirable but it ran deeper than lust.
A low rumbling churr vibrates under Leo's plastron once he focuses on your lace panties - dark blue and soaked even darker. Leo's large hand cups your face and you nuzzle into the comfort of it. The turtle's fingers are strong and thick as he pulls you to him so his lips could meet yours. His tongue wastes no time in forcing its way into your mouth, leaving you breathless as desire coursed through you. It was everything you had imagined but nothing at all at the same time.
"Princess," he murmurs against your mouth, "so sweet."
The praise envelops you like an aphrodisiac. Leo's fingers trace the edge of the lace before moving down, taking two fingers and swiping across your soaked entrance over the soaked fabric. Little sparks danced across your clit at the touch and you tried to grind down into his hand, whimpering when he pulled his hand away.
"So wet baby," he groaned, kissing you again hungrily, "Want me to touch you? Stroke your pretty little clit and stretch you nice and wide for me?
You nod, almost mad in your lust, bucking into his hand, "Please Leo. Want you. Want you so much. Don't make me wait." You are rewarded with another bruising kiss.
He removes one of his hands from your body to untie his pants and drop them onto the floor. His cock is huge, bigger than anyone you'd ever seen before, and dark with blood. You always pictured him to be proportional to the rest of his body but the reality surpassed all your fantasies thus far. He was going to be so big inside you -the stretch...
"I've thought about this princess," Leo murmurs, dark blue eyes fixed on your face again as he kicks his pants away from him and moving closer again. You could feel his cock against your belly, smearing precum on your skin. "Thought about how you'd look. How you'd feel. Hot and tight and mine. How'd you taste. Have you thought about me? Have you thought about me when you touch yourself at night? When you stick your pretty little fingers in your pretty little pussy?"
Shaking, you grip onto his arms to steady yourself and nod, "Yes, Leo." His fingers edge underneath the panties and slid them off you and you launch yourself forward into his arms, burying your face into his neck and clinging to him. You spread your legs, dripping as he teases your clit with his finger before tentatively testing the give of your entrance.
A load groan erupts from his mouth when it slips right in to the first knuckle and you clench around him, trying to pull it in further.
"Oh my lovely girl," he sighs, claiming your mouth in another kiss as you whimper and buck in his grip. "So good for me. All wet and wanting. I'm going to stretch you out nice and good."
"Please," you whisper, head tilted back as he moves down your neck, biting and nibbling licking as his finger slides deeper inside of you. He drags you right to the edge of an orgasm before pulling his finger free, grinning at the long winded whine it drew from you.
"Uh uh my good girl," he shushed, "You will come on my cock or not at all. Do you understand? Do you want to keep being my good girl?"
"I want to be your good girl, Leo please," you whine, canting forward to kiss him again. You could feel yourself being lifted, large green hands guiding your legs to wrap your legs around his waist so he is the only thing holding you up. The head of his cock nudged against your entrance as he hovers you above it and you try to cant down onto it, needy and wanting.
He pulls away from your mouth, panting, "Tell me I can."
Arousal made you slow and stupid so it took longer than it should have for you to understand what he meant. When you did, you trembled and nodded, pleas falling from your lips like a mantra.
Leo smirks, adjusting you in his grip before lowering you down, pushing the bulbous head of his cock into you. You fall against him again, licking and kissing his neck and shoulders as he lowered you down slowly, his cock sliding in inch by inch until you were stuffed full.
The stretch was so good. You feel so good.
Leo swears under his breath, nothing more than a growling whisper of words as you clench around him. He can feel you expanding around him, convulsing as you adjust to his size and grinding down to gain desperately sought friction.
Lifting you up, he adjusts his stance a bit for better leverage before gripping your waist hard and slamming you back down on him, praising you as he does. He's panting, breath ghosting over your slick skin as he lifts you up and down, impaling you over and over again like a rag doll. His lovely little fuck toy.
There are actual tears in your eyes from how wonderful it feels to finally be joined with him. Months of teasing and playing and flirting culminating into this desperate, passionate act of mutual adoration. You had waited so long for him.
"Oh baby girl. I'll never make you wait again." Had you said that out loud? As much as you wanted to be embarrassed, you couldn't be - not with the way he was thrusting inside you, hitting your special spot, and kissing your face and mouth.
"Feels - feels," you moan, breath hitching as sweat drips down your face and back.
"How does it feel lovely? Tell me."
"Feels so - so good. Leo. Leo! Leoleoleo!" You cry as you cum, writhing against Leo's plastron as he fucks you through it, hand slipping down to toy with your oversensitive clit. White lights dance behind your vision and you arch into the touch at the pain.
And oh, he likes that.
"Oh," Leo growls, sparks of fire dancing behind his eyes, "I'm going to enjoy you."
You preen, limp in his arms, and his pace builds until hes slamming into you brutally. When he cums, its deep inside you, burying his load and filling you up. A grunt forces his way out of him and you squeeze as much as you can around him, fucking him through it like he did for you.
You were always big on reciprocity.
You slump together onto the floor in a tangle of sweaty and sore body parts, enjoying the high as it ebbs between you both. He gently pulls out of you and you whimper at the loss and the feel of his seed trickling out of you.
Minutes tick by in silence before you open your eyes and stare into his. He's watching you intently, trying to gauge your reactions. He wants to know how you feel, how you are taking this new change in dynamic, if its something you want long term now that the game is over. He wants to know if you are his.
You smile, keeping your expression soft as you reach out for him again.
A beat and his smile presses against yours.
~~~~
End
~~~~
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the walls I built
this is for soy and that one anon who requested mean damian. you can tell which part is meant for who.
whoops
g/t mean girls
I knew I shouldn't have come into the courtyard to eat.
But the tiny cafeteria was crowded, and well- the giant one wasn't a choice.
But I would have opted for a bathroom stall over this.
"Why are you guys here." I try to keep my voice brave and level as I put my sketchbook away but neither giant in front of me seems to be buying it.
"Regina sent us, of course." Cady said. Damian just smiled.
"Please leave me alone." I don't bother fighting them. I don't have the energy to. My voice is soft and defeated and it should feel humiliating but I'm just too tired to care.
"Why would we do that?" Damian asks.
Why would you do that?
Oh, I dunno-
-maybe it's because we used to be friends?
Maybe because I thought you cared?
"Because you've already ruined my life! Twice now, I've lost everything. The people I cared about turned and made my life misery!" Both giants step back a bit at my lash out. Tears prick at my eyes as the sudden burst of anger fades. "So you could maybe give me one lunch period in peace."
Something registers on Cady's face but I can't read it. It doesn't feel very reassuring. "C'mon Damian. Let's leave space dyke be. We tried to be nice and talk to her. She just yelled at us like a bitch. Let's leave."
Cady grabbed Damian's arm and began to walk away, but Damian didn't move.
"Damian," Cady repeated. "We should go."
"No."
"I'm sorry?"
Unless it was Regina yelling at her friends, I never saw two plastics fight.
They always agreed and always acted under Regina's terms.
For Cady to pull away and leave-
I almost forgot what they were fighting about until the giants turned their attention back to me.
"Why don't you want to talk to us, Janis?" Damian asked. If I didn't know better, I think the concern laced into his features was real.
I felt cornered under the gaze of what was once my best friend. Somebody who was once my rock that I could always count on to be there. Somebody I could turn to and somebody I could trust. "I want to be left alone right now." Tears threatened to spill down my face and my voice was pathetically quiet.
"You heard her-" Cady tugged at his arm again. "It's not worth it here, Damian. C'mon I want lunch at some point today."
"Fine. We'll get you your lunch." Damian rolled his eyes. "Hey, Jan? You wanna come with?" He asks, feigning innocence.
"No, but thanks for the offer," I say, matching his sickly sweet tone.
"Oh come on! It will be fun! Cady, you want cheese fries?"
"I want to leave, actually."
Damian ignores her in favor of stepping closer to me. "C'mon Janis. It'll be just like the good old days. We can eat lunch together and chat. I'm sure Regina will be thrilled to see you." Damian reaches out and I instantly take several steps back, trying to keep the minimal distance we already have between us.
But I'm not fast enough.
I'm never fucking fast enough, huh.
Just before Damian can touch me, Cady's hand shoots out, grabbing his wrist.
I flinch backward at the sudden movement, holding my sketchbook close to my chest- like that will do anything to defend me.
"I said, we're leaving."
I was still shaking as I watched them walk away, Damian huffing about whatever Cady's problem was.
-
My pencil twirled idly between my fingers as I sat in my last period class of the day. I skipped all my giant classes, as I do regularly now, and zoned out in all my tiny once. Like this one. Can you blame me? I'm still trying to wrap my head around the events from lunch.
Regina's new favorite thing to do was send Cady and Damian to torment me instead of doing it herself.
It hurt more that way.
Regina knew that.
But my mind kept going back to Cady's odd behavior.
She wanted to get out of the courtyard so badly. But I wasn't in an ‘oh I can't be seen around Space Dyke’ way. It was different.
I couldn't figure out if that different was good or bad.
Damian on the other hand seemed more than willing to act on Reginas ordered.
My heart sinks to the bottom of my stomach.
Every day, Damian got less and less hesitant to be a bitch. He started having more and more fun in it.
Just like Gretchen at the begging- way back in eighth grade- and look at how she treats me now.
My phone buzzes, a message from a contact I thought I deleted, a number I could have sworn I blocked.
Hey, it's Cady. Please meet me at the pickup zone after school? It's just gonna be me. Nobody else. I swear.
I scoff, flipping my phone over. Yeah, that doesn't sound suspicious. At all.
My initial reaction is hell fucking no, but of course, the more I think about it, the more I start to consider.
That's often the case with Cady.
Even when Damian and I first met her.
I mean, there was a solid hour I had to wait and do nothing.
Maybe Cady will tell me why she was acting weird at lunch.
Or maybe I get attacked by four and one-sixteenth plastics who all hate me.
The bell rings as I make my decision.
-
"I wasn't sure if you were going to show up."
"I wasn't sure if I would either," I say stepping out onto the platform.
Just as Cady had said, there were no other plastics. I wasn't sure if being totally isolated with a giant made me feel better or worse.
"About lunch today-" Cady starts. I stiffen, ready to be slammed with slurs and insults. "I'm sorry."
Out of everything I expected, that wasn't it.
Cady looks away but continues talking. "I realized that it was wrong, to treat you like that. To treat anyone like that." She sighs. "I do so much to stay liked by Regina. But I'm hates and feared by everyone else. I don't want to be feared." Cady looks at her hands with mild disgust. "It's not worth it for the approval of one person."
We're silent for a while because I'm not sure if she has more to add.
When I think Cady's done, I speak. "It uh- sounds like you're going through your own little crisis. I don't really know how to help there but, thanks for apologizing."
Cady looks at me and I notice tears in her eyes.
I'm starting to get the feeling this episode of guilt didn't just start today.
"I miss you, Janis. So much. And I know I have no right to ask this for a second time, and I have no excuses for the way I've treated you. You don't even have to forgive me. But I can't deal knowing that you hate me and may even be scared of me. So I really am sorry. And I hope you can accept my apology."
"I-"
"You don't have to accept it now!" Cady backtracks quickly. "Or ever, actually. I was a shit person. I know that. But- I want you to know that I don't want to be. I don't want to be this plastic who's terrifying and will hurt anyone. And I don't know how to show that to you, but I promise I'm genuine."
I shift on my feet. Every part of me wants to believe Cady. But promises and nice words don't mean much anymore. Not after Cady left with Damian close behind. "I'll keep it in mind," I say with an awkward smile. "Thank you for earlier, though."
"Of course." Cady smiles. "And- just know I'm here. If you need a ride to class or somebody to drive you home- it's the least I could do. I know if I want to prove that I'm sorry I have a lot to work up from, but I want to do it."
I couldn't help the grin that found its way to my face. The optimism and good nature sounded just like the Cady Damian and I met in the bathroom on the first day of school. The Cady I missed.
"I'll text you if I need help," I say, with a nod. "I'm gonna go wait for the bus now, but thank you, Cady."
"Of course." She said with a small smile. "Thank you for hearing me out."
Our conversation replayed through my head as I walked away.
I didn't want to trust Cady again, at least not yet.
But there was something about that girl from Africa. No matter what happened, my walls always crumbled around her.
Maybe I wouldn't work so hard to build them up again.
wowie
@realmisspolarbear @smallsoysauce @musicallygt @sourishlemons
#g/t mean girls#tiny janis#giant cady#giant damian#its gay#only a little tho#its more of a sad fic then a gay fic#all my fics are angst#are you surprised?#ill change my url to marvinsangst
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All In How You Look At It || Orion, Tiaret and Winston
Things had really taken a twist, Winston wasn’t completely sure when everything had become a part of a horror movie, but everything was very dark right now. Not literally. They’d already done that. But in other ways for sure. They hadn’t been able to get Darwin on the phone, on the internet, and so they’d taken Rio, taken the ridiculous amount of research that they had done and put it in their back and then shot out to Darwin’s place. Pulling up outside of their house, Winston stepped out of the car and scratched the bandage that covered their eyelid and closed the door. “Hey, you got everything?” Winston asked with a frown, “I can take a look round the back but it might just be worth … you know literally knocking on the door.”
The eye, the demons, the visions had consumed his days. Orion could barely sleep and hadn’t really wanted to. All he wanted was to read and research and figure out what was going on. He had been surviving on energy drinks and snack cakes and whatever few hours of sleep he got through power naps. Just knowing that the eye was still on their hands and that it could come back to Orion at any moment was enough to give him insomnia. When they got to Darwin’s, Rio crawled from the passenger seat, slinging the book bag over his shoulder that held all of his books and notes. The thing must have been half the weight of Rio himself and hung along his back, forcing Rio’s posture straighter as he walked. Darwin had told him that he could grab some more texts on demons and that was exactly what Rio planned on doing. “Knocking is fine.” Rio agreed with Winston, heading up to the front door and hitting his knuckles against it a few times. “Someone’s inside.” Rio mentioned absent-mindedly, his heightened hearing picking up on footsteps within the home. “Just can’t tell if it’s Darwin or not.”
Tia had spent the better part of her day sleeping. Darwin's apartment was hardly a palace, but it was warm, and clean, and for the moment that was all she needed. Her eyes peeled open at the sound of someone speaking below her window. Rubbing her eyes, she sat up in her bed and groaned at the tightness in her muscles. Were humans ever not in pain? Ignoring it for the moment, she rose to her feet and crossed to the window, peering down at the two people who had interrupted her beauty sleep. She tilted her head and observed them as they knocked on the door of Darwin's shop and waited for him to answer. She wondered, for a moment, if she should stay silent and let them leave on their own accord. No, you have a deal. She rolled her eyes and left the window and took the short trip to the store, taking her sweet time as she strolled to the door. Opening it, she smiled at her new guests. "Has anyone ever told you how rude it is to disturb a lady's beauty sleep?" Tiaret greeted, leaning against the frame of the door. "Darwin isn't here at the moment, I'm afraid. You'll have to visit him some other time. Preferably when I'm awake."
The woman who answered the door was very clearly not Darwin. She really didn’t look to be that much older than Orion or Winston. But she certainly carried herself as if she was much more mature or regal. “Oh uh- Sorry.” Rio answered, scratching at his neck nervously, “I wasn’t aware that anybody lived here with Darwin.” He didn’t know what to do here. Clearly, the woman had no intention of letting them in. If her figure blocking the doorframe hadn’t been evidence enough, her next sentence instructing them to come back later cemented that. But Rio and Winston really needed those books. Rio felt like they could figure this out. Stop whatever was going on. He felt like they were getting so close. Like the picture of a puzzle finally coming together. All they needed were a few more pieces. Just a couple more clues and suddenly everything would click. “Uh actually-” Rio began, surprising himself that he hadn’t just shied away and crept back towards the car in defeat, “Darwin told me I could come by anytime. He has a few books that I am supposed to grab.” Rio tried explaining that to her, hoping she would accept it and leave them be. “I can pull it up on my phone if you need any proof. My name’s Orion. Or Rio. This is my friend Winston. Darwin has been helping us with some research.”
"Don't worry your head, it's a recent development." Tia was a selfish being. It wasn't a fact she disparaged against herself, she thought selfishness to be necessary for survival. When she had made her deal with Darwin to assist him and his friends in their dilemma, it was strictly because he was giving her a place to stay. "So you're Darwin's little friends," The ex-demoness smiled, looking up and down at the two. Darwin hadn't told her their names, only that they were looking for answers to put down… well, something ancient and powerful. That just happened to be her expertise. "The ones who need the help of… darker forces." She stepped out of the doorway and nudged for them to enter. "By all means, come right in. I've been expecting you."
Honestly, Winston’s first reaction was whether this was Darwin’s girlfriend, but considering that they were 100% sure that Darwin was gay, they decided that probably wasn’t the case. Honestly, Winston wasn’t sure if they had the energy for this. Once they’d grabbed the books there were still a million other pressing and urgent things to do. Their personal life had become such a mess. “Nice to meet you, sorry that we woke you, but Darwin did say we could grab this stuff and we need it,” after all this was as much for Darwin’s benefit as it was for Winston’s they knew that Darwin was enjoying this less then they were to say the least. Not to mention the blinking eye hanging above them, the eyes that were everywhere and the terrifying cultists that they were also now dealing with. “Rio do you know which books we needed?” Winston honestly wasn’t doing the best with the research at the moment, all the deaths and now everything with the eye had left with them with less time then they’d have liked to look into these things. Fortunately Rio had picked up the slack.
She was expecting them? That wasn’t creepy at all. Orion tried for a smile, hoping that the scepticism and apprehension didn’t leak into his facial expression. Whether or not he trusted her or not, Darwin apparently did. Or at least he did enough to ask her to help them with their research. Did they need the help of darker forces? Rio supposed the time for desperation had long since passed, but he couldn’t help but wonder if there were still other ways. “Uh- Yeah. Generally, I mean. There’s a group of books that he told me about. I know what I’m looking for.” He shrugged. He was convinced that a quick scan of the books would help at least. If he could just match up some of the demonic language he had with one of the books, then that would be a start. “So uh-” Rio realized after stepping into the entryway that she had shared her name with them yet. “You mentioned that you can help us? How exactly is that? You do ritual magic stuff like Darwin does?” He questioned. The blood ritual had given Rio more questions than answers, but it at least proved that there was something more sinister behind a cult and a squid. “Honestly, Winston and I will take whatever help we can get right now.” He wasted no time finding the books that Darwin had packed for him, scrounging through them and rushing through the pages as he waited for the woman’s response.
Tia watched them wander Darwin's store from her place near the door, making sure to lock the useless piece of glass and wood behind them. "By all means, your welcome to whatever you like." She said dully, walking until she came to sit at a nearby armchair. It dwarfed her small, human body, she realized as she got comfortable. That was the worst part of humanity, she believed, how stagnant they remained for years and years. Had she wanted, she would have appeared strong, terrifying. Instead she was left to give off the appearance of vulnerability, and that meant she was forced to compensate. If she could not be a demoness, she could certainly act like one. "Something like that," She lied, checking her nails as she spoke. "I'm an expert in demon languages, demon spellwork, etcetera, etcetera…" Tia forgot how much she enjoyed lying to mortals. Even if it was small, it reminded her of her life before it was destroyed. "You might say I'm a voyeur of sorts."
Winston didn’t miss the door locking behind them. “Thanks, I appreciate the help, we’re trying to fix whatever the hell is wrong with the sun and the only way to do that is to find out what we actually need to do.” The ocean had turned to ink, the sky was home to a giant blinking eye instead of the sun and there were cultists and literal eyeballs everywhere. “Wait?” Winston turned and looked at her interested suddenly, “If you’re an expert on demons and demon spell work and all that fun shit then you could probably help us,” Winston looked around and glanced at the bandage on their hand that was covering the eyelid on their palm. “The whole eye in the sky shit, I’m - I mean - we are pretty sure that it is because this cult is trying to summon a demon army or something into the real world and we might all die because of it at any moment. The cultists that are even more active then before are kind of proof of that and do you think maybe you could look at some stuff and see if it I don’t know - means anything to you?”
Orion lost the conversation pretty quickly after getting consumed by the books. He wasn’t being as thorough as he would have liked to be, but time was running out for him to be picking the texts apart word by word. Maybe after all this was ever, he could. Instead, he grabbed out any books that he thought may be old enough to help them, quite literally judging the books by their covers. He flipped through them, skipping paragraphs and then pages and then simply flipping through entire sections, looking for anything that stood out. “Did you say expert on demon languages?” Rio fell back into the conversation at the sound of that. It was funny how quickly his feelings for the woman changed when he realized that she was an expert in something Rio was passionate about. “Woah.” He definitely had questions for her. An entire notebook of notes to ask her about. “Right here!” Rio yelled out finally, pointing at a page and jumping up, “This word. It’s the same one from the knife. Water. Just like what the cultists were saying.” Rio brought the book over closer to the two and held it out, “All we have going for us right now are fragments of a story or spell or something. Water. A beacon. Joining bodies.” He sighed. They needed to find the thread that tied them all together. “Please.”
Tia blinked at them in surprise, shrinking back into the chair unconsciously for a moment. Usually she reveled in attention, but for some reason, a bout twisted in her stomach that she couldn't describe. Wordlessly, she took the book that the man- Rio she thought his name was- handed to her as he yelled about water and bodies and whatever else the humans had gotten themselves tangled in. When she arrived in town to find all the oddities, she had almost thought it hilarious, at first. Surely it was the work of a demon with a sense of humor. But they were right in their assertion, there was something malevolent about it all. Scouring the page, she read her native language with ease. Oh poor dears, they had been way off. "Not water and bodies- the joining of bodies of water." She said turning the book around to point it out to them. "A lake and the sea, more specifically." The longer she read, the deeper the crease between her brows became. Her gaze shot up to them, curious and what the humans may have called worry. "Where did you learn of this? This is… very ancient and dangerous magics. More ancient than I am, in fact."
“We’ve both kind of been working on this for a long time, there have been weird things going in town since the new year and we’ve been doing as much research as we can,” Winston replied hesitantly, they weren’t sure if they should just be telling everyone they met about this. But if there was someone that could help then they would need their help. There had been so much, so many deaths, so much loss, so much horror and so much terror that Winston was beyond enthusiastic about fixing this. “Wait, wait, you said combining the lake and the sea, that sounds a lot like something else that I’ve found,” Winston looked at the bandage on their hand again. They had been researching for months now and finally this was something that they thought was useful. “Do you happen to know if Darwin has a copy of a Theory of Demonology?” Winston asked curiously, “I’ve been looking for it everywhere, it is referenced everywhere but it seems rare.”
What had she meant... more ancient than herself? Orion knew what it implied and it had certainly piqued his curiosity, but he needed to stay focused. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to circle back around to that later. She made him uncomfortable, but maybe it was just because the two didn’t know each other. Maybe Rio could make friends, or allies. “Holy crap.” Rio proclaimed. The woman had fit the pieces together. “The lake and the ocean. I bet it has something to do with the beach, where the chest originally washed up.” But why now? What had started this? And what were the cultists planning to do at the lake and the ocean? What did joining the bodies of water mean? Most importantly, how did they stop it?There were still so many questions. “He has to have a copy right? This weird creepy stuff is like Darwin’s thing. Do you know anything about it?” He directed at the woman.
Tiaret watched the two babble to each other about their discoveries, her fingers dancing over the book. She itched to turn the page and find what else might have been hidden in methe thick, obviously extensive text. Perhaps there was something about curses powerful enough to mortalize a demon and how to break them. That was the point of them, wasn't it? All curses had a loophole to extort, even her own, she was sure. "Yes, beaches are crossroads, are they not? Between one world and another. It would make sense for a ritual to draw power from binding two bodies of water." Tia frowned at the them. "Do I look like Darwin's personal librarian? Look at this place, the book could be anywhere." But, of course, she didn't mention that she has spent a good amount of time snooping through Darwin's things. She turned her gaze back to the book in her lap, finding that reading the demonic language was somewhat comforting. Tiaret sighed and raised a black tipped finger to a bookshelf behind the counter. "He had a few books that sounded interesting over there, though I didn't look at them all."
Winston had stopped listening to Tia and Rio at that point. They were hastily looking through the stack of books and looking for anything that might give them more information. They had to find more information on the joining of these bodies of water. “This all does seem to revolve around the lake and the ocean, it all has been somewhat nautically themed in terms of all of the weird things that have been happening so I guess that would make sense.” Pausing for a moment, Winston bit their finger nail and spotted the title that they were looking for. What a rare stroke of luck. “It doesn’t matter if you’re his personal librarian or not, but I think I’ve found it,” Winston pulled down a large tome and placed it gently on a desk. Flipping it open, they began to do their best to struggle through the demon language that they were well aware that they did not fluently speak. “I think that this should have instructions on a very similar ritual, there was an account of it, something that they did in Eastern Europe in the 12th century,” but unfortunately they only knew that because of a note in a Scribes journal referencing it, they had yet to be fortunate enough to actually discover the book.
Orion’s mind was running a mile a minute. He stood, arms crossed and staring at the ceiling. He had his eyes clamped shut and he tried to think. To pull any information from his mind that may be relevant. That may help make sense of it all. The chest at the beach. The cult at the lake. The eyes. So many eyes. The eyes were the big thing here. The eye in the sun, the lake, washing up on the beach. And of course the creepiest ones of all, the eyes within Winston, Darwin and Rio’s hand that gave them visions of other eye shaped creatures. It made Rio shudder, goosebumps snaking across his skin. He rubbed his hands up his arms over the sleeves of his hoodie to try to get the goosebumps to go away, but it wouldn’t stop his skin from crawling. He glanced over at Winston, they were pulling a large tome free and flipping through it. “There was something about a beacon too. My best guess was some kind of lighthouse. Considering the connection with water.” He ran his hands over the closed scar where the eye had been last week. Would the woman know anything about the eye if he had it right now? Could she do anything to shed some more light on it? “I’m sorry. We didn’t want to disrupt your sleep, but we need answers. I really appreciate your help with this. Can you uh- Take a look at that book maybe? See if you can help Winston find what they’re looking for?”
“Eastern European magic? How fun.” Tiaret said in a dull tone, checking her black-clawed nails with deliberate interest. How worried they both seemed. For as long as she could remember, humans had always been selfish little creatures. Coming to her with their wishes and whims and expecting to give nothing in return. Could they truly blame her for having twisted their desires? When they were so adamant on obtaining them by any means necessary? But the two standing before her didn’t seem like those other humans. Neither did Darwin, now that she thought of it. Their concern didn’t seem mired within themselves. If they were unhappy with White Crest, they could simply leave, instead they were making the decision to stay and fight… whatever it is that plagued the odd town. She eyed them, an eyebrow raised and a curious glint in her dark eyes. “Well, since you asked so politely,” She took the book into her hands and set it across her lap, scanning over it idly. “Yes, it speaks of a ritual. Ancient, of course, but very powerful and very complicated.” A chuckle slipped past her lips. “I think there’s mention of a sacrifice. How lovely, sacrificial magic was always a favorite of mine.” She raised her gaze to look at the both of them. “There’s power in blood, did you know that?” Her eyes floated back to the book, her nail tapping against the spine rhythmically. “There are more instructions needed. An order to things. If that order is not followed, then…,” She frowned. “What is that term you humans use? Oh, right, how could I forget? You’re fucked.”
Pursing their lips, Winston gazed at Tuareg intently as she began explain what she had read. Winston’s demonic languages obviously needed some work because they were pretty sure they had red the symbol for blood as crimson milk which whilst sensical was inaccurate. “So there is a ritual involving blood, which of course makes sense because blood was what started all of this at least to some extent, blood is clearly a powerful tool that can be used to generate more power.” Winston wondered if they could combine it with their current project but they didn’t exactly have the time to be considering these sorts of trivialities. It was clear however that the order to things was not in the passage that she had just read from and Winston was convinced that they would need to do more research here. “Okay, the overall ritual itself requires two rituals to take place, the joining of bodies makes it pretty clear that one will have to happen at the lake and one by the ocean and then at least symbolically they will be joining the bodies, but that’s not anything on the actual ritual.” Winston was sure that they were going to hate this. “Rio, dude, I think we need to use the eye again to work this out. We don’t have enough information on the ritual and I can cast the spell Darwin did, he explained the theory enough, but it means taking another vision. Can you handle it?”
If Orion had any doubts before, the woman had now made it incredibly clear that she was not human. But what did that mean exactly? A vampire maybe? Some type of Fae? He knew stories about other, more ancient supernatural species though Rio didn’t know a lot about them. Sometimes he wished there was some spell to make him absorb all the information at the Scribe headquarters at once. At least then he wouldn’t feel so clueless all the time. “We are way too familiar with blood rituals.” Rio sighed, weighing whether or not he should ask her about her comments. About how she knew all of this information. But now didn’t seem like the right time. “Thank you- Uh, for your help. We need to figure out exactly how to do the ritual or we’re… what she said. Screwed.” Rio knew what was coming next. He hated it. He definitely didn’t think it was a good idea considering the last time. And yet it was Winston asking. And Rio couldn’t say no to them. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t complain about it. “I knew you were going to suggest that.” Rio groaned, crossing his arms as if to feign pouting over it. “Fine. Just know I detest this.” As if there were ever any doubts that Rio wouldn’t do it for Winston. “Do you want to help? You know a lot about this stuff, clearly. You would know what to look for. Or pick up things that we may miss.” He asked the woman, uncertain if she would want to involve herself in the blood ritual of two humans that were practically children still.
“You say it with such disdain. Blood magic is still magic, no?” In her long life, she had witnessed and participated in a myriad of rituals of all kinds. If there was one conclusion to be drawn, it was that humans were willing to go to barbaric and incredible lengths to attain whatever they needed. Often, those who came before her had walked a path of hell and high water to kneel and beg for her help. She thought on that for a moment, seeing flashes of people on their knees in front of her, begging for… Why did that make her heart clench? Her hand splayed over her chest where her heart lay, a small frown marring her features. Tiaret’s eyes narrowed in confusion as she listened to their conversation. What on Earth were they talking about? “...Am I going to regret this?” She asked as she rose from her seat and crossed over to them. “I will warn you, I have a vicious temper for people who attempt to harm me. So if even one of my immaculate blonde hairs are out of place, there will be hell to pay.” She smiled twisting her hands in front of her, palm up, as if to offer them to her. “I’d love to help. Do go on, whatever it is you both are trying to do.”
Shaking their head gently, Winston sighed. “It’s not disdain, we’ve just not exactly had the best experience with it, besides technically this is like fairly simple mental magic, we just use the blood as a spell component of sorts.” Winston didn’t really get the concept that there was magic that was forbidden. All magic was an exchange. Sometimes it took a lot. Necromancy for example, Winston had seen first hand how much that cost. It didn’t mean the magic was evil. Perhaps the motive. That was another matter though. “Well, I don’t think you’ll get any physical pain, but this is kind of disturbing, at least, we found it disturbing. Maybe it won’t be the same for you?” They didn’t wait for the answer, the eye had returned to their hand that morning and Winston hadn’t exactly relished it’s return. They had suffered a vision already and it was as bad as Winston had remembered it, leaving them shaking and sweating. Swallowing away their fear, Winston took a seat on the floor and held the eye out, taking Tia’s hand without pausing they quickly chanted the incantation and watched as the eyelid opened and the hazel eye gazed out of their palm up at them. It blinked once before Winston finished their spell. Immediately they were back there, in that place. Except, it was different this time. Rather then a horde of terrible monsters, Winston spotted something. They didn’t know how they knew, but a figure took the horizon and Winston knew that they were a Hunter, or a Slayer or a Warden. They didn’t know how they knew. They just knew.
“We aren’t dangerous.” Orion assured her, offering a smile as evidence and holding his free hand out towards her, “We are just trying to help the people in this town. I swear.” Too similar to a promise, his sister would say. Orion hadn’t promised, but was a swear close enough if the woman with them had been Fae? Did it matter? Rio hadn’t been lying. He did want to help the people and he wasn’t dangerous. Even if it had been binding, it wasn’t a promise that Rio would break either way. Winston took control of the spell this time, taking Darwin’s place. Rio wasn’t concerned about Winston leading, he had full trust in them. The only fear he had was for their safety, as well as Rio and the woman helping. But soon it didn’t matter, because the spell was done and the visions were there. There was a lot of information to take in. Rio could see the ritual, the parts taking place, step by step. And although nobody spoke, the words hummed inside of Rio’s head, explaining any portions missed. A group of people together. A hunter. A shapeshifter. A human. A demon. And someone to lead the spell. Rio cringed, feeling the pain as a shapeshifter was forced to harm the human, to spill their blood for this spell. All at the hands of a hunter. And then the demon’s blood was mixed in. Rio felt outside of his body, an astral projection floating above the gruesome scene he was forced into watching. All he wanted was for it to stop. But he couldn’t let go. Couldn’t break the spell. They needed to see everything or else it couldn’t be stopped.
Well, she supposed that was noble. To a certain sort. Still, Tiaret didn’t trust humans and she probably never would. She had seen the absolute worst of them and all throughout history they had proven themselves unworthy of her time. But now, she was… reliant on them. And in exchange for that reliance, she would have to offer all that she knew. Had she had her magic, she would have reveled in such a deal. Cautiously, and with all the willpower she could summon, she touched her hand to his. The feeling that coursed through her was in fact, quite disturbing. The images flashed through her mind so fast that she could barely comprehend them. Her very human, very non-magical mind was almost overwhelmed by it. Her fingers clenched around their hands, her muscles clenching so tight she felt as if she couldn’t breathe for a moment. And then, all at once, it was over. She wretched her hands from them, quickly reaching up to wipe away the blood that trickled from her nose. As she did, she noted the uncontrollable shaking of her hands. Still, she wiped it away with the back of her sleeve and looked at them both, her eyes pricking with tears. “The hunter turns its prey into a beast and the beast harms an innocent.” She said in a slightly wavering tone, clenching her arms around herself to stop the shaking. “A master of demons must then take the innocent blood and mix it with that of a dark creature… And then that creature must die.” For some reason, that fact made her… sad. The sinking in her stomach was more powerful than she thought it would be. But she tried her hardest not to let it show on her face, keeping her expression neutral. “Drown. The demon must drown, I mean. Before that, an exorcist must summon the power of both rituals into it so that when it dies, the rest of whatever ridiculously powerful creature you’re trying to eliminate will die as well.” She frowned at them judgmentally. “Do you make it a habit of fighting things above your caliber? This ritual is meant to rid this world of a terribly powerful being.”
As the visions and the spell ended and Winston was once more wrenched back to reality a terror truly set into their bones at that ritual. This was something that they might be a little under equipped for, but fortunately they had friends that they would be able to get to help them. The entire vision seemed to be a ritual and they were clearly instructions about what they could do to fix everything that was going wrong and Winston needed to write them down, they quickly set about typing what Tiaret was saying into their phone, making a digital copy in case something happened. It was too important to lose now. They had their answer and they knew how they were going to make things better. “God, fuck fuck okay,” Winston took several deep breaths and pulled their glasses straight. Running a hand through their hair they tried their best to think. “I didn’t pick a fight with this thing, squirdward just HAD to come and play in White Crest. This is probably why so much terrible shit has been going on but no one ever listens to any of us when we say that something weird is going on.” Swallowing Winston pulled out their inhaler and took a quick puff of it, the ventolin soothing their harried breathing. “Obviously Rio and I aren’t going to do this on our own, by the sound so fit we’re going to have to have multiple rituals, so we’re going to need to get help. Which is fine. We can do that.” Slowly standing, Winston grabbed an energy drink from their bag and swallowed several gulps in an attempt to replace the energy they had lost with caffeine, which was always an empty replacement. “We need to go, but thank you for your help.”
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[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 39
Last time: The Blondes finally met back up with the Brunettes, Yoki was an idiot who tried to burgle the Leto-damned ARMSTRONGS, and Scar either kidnapped or “kidnapped” Winry. Onwards!
New Intro! We’ve got the two young brothers separated by wind, then the title drawn in sand before it’s white text with a glowing red TC and the brothers running in opposite directions. Are we going to have a Party Split? Nevermind, they just slowed down to the middle of the screen. Bright light, Ed should have brought a hat to this sunny bunch of rocks. Then he looks off all dramatic like as camera goes to Al trudging through a desert before he too does the Dramatic Protagonist Stare. Both brothers back to back against the Xerxes mural ok seriously betting on a Party Split here with all the opposite directions going on. Now the Elric Brothers are running at each other and yep just phased through to become Red (Ed) and Blue (Al). Looking around for each other? Whatever happens I guess Al is with May since he has Shao on his shoulder and her gripping his hand, Ed’s got Winry in unzippered gear on his side. Camera pans out to show Al with May, Scar, and Marcoh to the left, Al, Winry, and Granny Rockbell to the right. Then a bunch more people start popping up? Can’t tell who is on which team anymore.
Short image of Al’s Body in the whitespace, becomes a Stone which shatters to show a smug-looking Pride. Now Ed’s running about striking shadow blades in a forest (Ed vs Pride fight?), Al’s in the rocky desert fighting more toothy Pride blades. Wrath in what looks like a basic longsleeve shirt and vest (no uniform?) fighting LING YES TURN AGAINST THE GOTHS MY GREEDY LITTLE PRINCE Envy’s in Titan form getting sliced up by YES BRING BACK BADASS NINJA BODYGUARDS. Now it’s Armstrong The Great looking serious, Sloth burst out from snow to be used as target practice by Sideburns and a bunch of tanks but Kimblee swoops in and blows the shells up. Beard’s walking along with his briefcase frowning towards Central in the distance. Ed and Al stand back to back in a TC in the desert (not as rocky as the one Ed was in, but not as sandy as the one Al was in), shot of the Door of Truth opening and shattering, ends on the Alchemist Watch covered by the title and silhouettes of the Elric Brothers.
Back where we left off: It’s a cloudy and windy day in Baschool, where Scar is carrying Winry’s limp form and glaring down at Kimblee. The Ishvalan comments on how they’ve changed positions from the last time they met, the Alchemist says he shouldn’t be so confident.
Episode 39 - “Daydream”
Oh no Winry’s in trouble so Ed is grabbing Kimblee’s coat and yelling at him for letting his mechanic get captured, Kimblee tells him to move aside while pulling off his gloves (hey, he’s kinda Roy’s opposite in that regard), Ed blocks his arms so that he won’t hurt Winry by attacking Scar. The Ishvalan then shatters the building, creating a nice big dust cloud to walk away in. Kimblee’s about to chase after him but a mustached soldier says that it’s too dangerous to go close to the damaged building, they need to fall back. Oh, and there’s a snowstorm incoming so they have to find shelter! Man, it has just not been Kimblee’s day, has it?
Ed, Sideburns, Al and some soldiers are walking along, Miles compliments Ed on his performance aha, called it! Ross Deception! Ed’s not happy about having to play along with the “stupid charade”, though.
Flashback! Scar isn’t apologizing for the death of Winry’s parents. She has every right to pass judgement on him. Winry… walks away, reaches into a box, and pulls out some cloth. Oh, wow. It it wasn’t already clear, Winry is Best Girl. Bandaging an injury on her parent’s killer? Ed and Scar are equally shocked at her compassion and what. What is that face. I’m sorry, this is a sweet and touching moment and all, but Scar? What is going on with your face here?
That is quite possibly the best Does Not Compute face I’ve ever seen. Just, Scar has no idea how to process this.
Winry’s saying that if her parents saved his life before, then there must have been a reason. But like Leto does this mean that she’s forgiven him for his murders. She’s not gonna cry though, she promised… wait, I thought it was Ed who promised that the next time she cried it would be tears of joy? Ah whatever.
Ok, you’ve got Scar bound up. Angry boyfriend proclamations aside, time to make him decipher the book NO DON’T CALL HEADQUARTERS YOU IDIOTS. Aaaargh. Wait Scar’s asking Sideburns what he meant by “one of your people”, can’t understand how an Ishvalan could stomach being part of the Amestrian military. Sideburns responds that he’s working on the inside to change Amestrian views of Ishvalans, Scar is shocked at such an idea, and that it was an Amestrian that set Sideburns on the path. Scar can only look down.
[Scar]: “Look at me. I am a festering wound of hatred born of the Ishvalan War. I am thankful that there is someone like you out there.”
Aaargh but just as Scar is realizing that maybe wanton murder isn’t the way to go about things the call goes through, and Kimblee is on his way to “deal” with Scar. This drives Marcoh and May to reveal themselves. Finally! Oh, and now May can patch up Scar’s arm!
Outside the Mustached Mook is noting the stormy clouds, Kimblee tells them to hurry up (gee, I wonder if he’ll get there in time?). Marcoh and May are yes thank you for Leto’s sake it took long enough they’re saying that they’ve got groundbreaking Alchemy/Alkahestry research but the only one who can read it is Scar. Sideburns notes that May is the Alkahestry girl they’ve been searching for as well, says that she needs to come back with them to Fort Briggs. Add in that Scar’s needed to read the notes and it’d be just as bad for Marcoh to be recaptured, looks like all three need to go back to the Fort. Ed’s just a mite unhappy with needing Scar’s help, Sideburns knocks him upside the head with the fact that the Goths are pulling some sort of giant TC shenanigans, they need all the info and help they can get right now.
Ed stands down after the suggestion that with Scar’s help they can disgrace Kimblee and get Winry away from his clutches. One Ishvalan Oath later Scar’s judgement is postponed… and the Chimeras are waking up, uh oh. The kids balk at Sideburns’ orders to kill them, the Chimeras sadly agree with Sideburns, saying that they can never go back to their old lives. Al tries reasoning with them, appealing to their families but they’ve been told they’re dead. And it’s not like they can go back like this, we’d just be imitating the 2005 Fantastic Four, and nobody wants that.
But Al does get them to yell that “of course they want their old bodies back”, when they quite reasonably say that it can never happen Al does the helmet remove to show his Soul Armor state.
[Al]: “Well I’m going back. No matter how long it takes. I’m not giving up.”
Ooh, is Al getting some followers? Watch him form an army out of Chimeras tossed aside by the Goths, take them down with their own creations.
Unfortunately the snowstorm’s coming in, meaning that they can’t reach the Fort until it passes. And Kimblee’s on his way, so they need a plan-
[Yoki]: “This is a mining town, isn’t it? Why don’t we just go into the underground tunnels?”
[Everyone]: *turns in surprise to the secret tactical genius in their midst*
[Yoki]: “W-what’s wrong? I mean, this is a pretty large mine, right? So surely there’s a tunnel that can take us beyond the mountains, uh… I think?”
[Everyone]: “That’s it!”
[Yoki, Tactical Genius]: “H-hey, give me some credit; this is what I did for a living!”
Ha! Way to finally pull your weight, you C-tier flashback antagonist!
Confirming that the tunnels go past the mountains- wait. Wait wait wait. Isn’t the whole point of the mountains that they are between Amestris and Drachma? Ooh, do we finally get to see another country?! Please let my dream of missionary Drachma’s with Leto pamphlets be a reality! Sideburns gives Marcoh notes for any Briggs soldiers the meet after the tunnel (watch them run into Drachmans first and cause all sorts of problems: “These people have notes written in Amestrian! They must be spies from Fort Briggs!”). But what about Winry? If she just up and vanishes with them then Kimblee will suspect the Elrics of foul play!
[Winry]: “Um, I hate to be the one to suggest this, but, uh… What do you think Kimblee would do if I was suddenly taken hostage by Scar?”
Whoa, so kidnapped!Winry was Winry’s idea? Props to you, mechanic!
Mid-ep pictures of Winry Rockbell and human Jerso/Toad and Zampano/Boar.
Ed and Al are understandably uneasy with the plan, but Winry shouts them down about being able to at least choose her captor if she’s a hostage either way. Come on Protagonists, learn that you don’t have to or can do everything by yourselves! Scar again promises to protect Winry before Ed lets him loose, when the Chimeras as to be taken along as well. They’ve failed which means Kimblee’s going to kill them either way…
[Boar]: “Besides, we don’t want to give up either.”
Look at you go Alphonse, already with your two inhuman followers!
Also, they’re just a little confused and upset about all this talk of this band of misfits trying to stop some catastrophe that threatens their families along with all of Amestris. Y’know, just a minor detail.
Kimblee’s inbound, better hurry. Sideburns asks wait what they’re back to human? Uh ok, with all the talk about being monsters I was kinda assuming that their beast forms were permanent, not something that they could consciously deactivate. Kinda undercuts the whole “we want our human bodies back” if they can shapeshift back like this.
The groups are splitting up (to my surprise it’s not the Elric Brothers who are going different ways, at least for now), a soldier remarks that Winry needs to remove her earrings ok what. Seriously, what? This just totally broke my immersion, you cannot tell me that now is the moment when having metal earrings in the frozen north would cause discomfort and haven’t been an issue yet, especially when she came up north specifically because her boyfriend’s metal arm was seizing up. But whatever, she gives them to Ed for safekeeping before promising to see him back at the Fort. Ed gazes up after her, clenching his fist and probably crushing those precious earrings that he was just trusted with. Nice going, kiddo.
Explosion! Acting! Snowstorm!
Those left in Baschool are sheltering in a building, alternately looking at girlfriend’s jewelry, wondering where their fellow Chimeras have gone, and arguing for planning the next leg of the search. Then Sideburns gets a call from the Fort?
Ooooooooh, right. There was that whole “forces from Central showing up to look for Raven” thing going on last time. And our guys are walking right into that mess. Whoops.
Down in the tunnel Marcoh’s going on and on about how the Rockbell Doctors were widely respected during the Ishvalan War, how they helped all without regard for themselves. Meanwhile Scar’s walking in the back having flashbacks to Winry’s “I don’t forgive your wanton murdering”, an Ishvalan Elder telling Scar that while he should never forgive the Military’s “wanton murder” that he must abide it-
-to break the chain of hatred, and his brother saying he studies Alchemy to replace hatred with understanding.
And here is Scar, following the orders of an Ishvalan who willingly works in the Military to change it, representing the ideals of Scar’s brother and Elders. So what does that make him?
Yoki’s having the group stop in an underground office, to pick up a more detailed map of the tunnels. Man, who’d have thought that freaking Yoki would be the most useful party member at this point. Or ever? Inspired by Al, Toad and Boar are pestering Marcoh about any clues in the journal (that he can’t read), they banter with each other about their families. Aw, they’re actually friends! Nice to show that even the Central forces have loved ones, hopefully for real this time after that infuriating Bradley & Selim fakeout.
May? What’s wrong? Oh. Oh yeah. Her whole mission was to learn the secret of the Philosopher’s Stone, only to find out it’s based on suffering and the obtaining of immortality for one at the expense of so, so many others. And His Imperial Highness, aka her father, apparently would make one without a moment’s hesitation using any number of his people. So apparently he leans more towards Wrath’s philosophy of leadership than Ling’s. But if she doesn’t bring back the secret of immortality, her clan is in danger from all the others. Marcoh says that the notes might have the humane secret to immortality, they just need to hurry up get to the Fort so Scar can get a-translating.
[Ed]: “What do you mean, ‘the Fort is no longer safe’?!”
Welp. Just when we get Armstrong The Great as an ally, she’s been summoned back to Central and a Military Officer’s getting put in her place, along with a bunch of other Central forces. So now the Tunnel Team is walking into a hostile environment without knowing. They have to be warned, but how? Ed wants to go but he’ll freeze before he gets anywhere close…
[Al]: “There is a way! Listen: send someone who doesn’t have a body. That storm won’t freeze me to death!”
Uh, Al? Sure I guess you wouldn’t catch hypothermia, but you’re still a giant suit of steel armor. Remember how there was that whole “Ed’s arm freezing up” problem that was fixed by replacing his entire arm? You don’t have body heat like a living person, your limbs are just gonna ice up. Actually, how the Leto hasn’t that happened yet?
Huh. I guess Souls act as armor heaters too, Al’s having more trouble just seeing where he’s walking in the blizzard than actually moving. He sees the path but the winds picks up and the screen whites out from the snow GAH ZOMBIE AL! Oh shit how did Al end up in the Whitespace? Uh, well you’ve found your body? Quick, grab it and let’s get wait no it was an illusion. What, you getting snow madness buddy?
Oh. Oh shit. We’ve got a flashback to Barry musing that foreign bodies can’t hold souls for too long, Al’s freaking out about his body trapped in Whitespace, pulling on his soul as it’s rejected by his armor… he can’t think about that right now, he has to hurry. Without the map now, since he dropped it after that vision.
Oh hell it’s this asshole.
[Uncle]: “Alphonse Elric. Edward Elric. And also… there’s… Van Hohenheim. Izumi Curtis, she’s a possibility-”
Aside from all the awfulness of listing off Potential Sacrifices, which is looking a lot more like ‘killing all of these people, not just one or the other’, did you just purposefully knock over Izumi’s piece? Rude, and I can’t wait to see her punch you.
“That leaves one more.”
New end credits! Rapid guitar music as we race through a 3D hallway/tunnel, outside looks like Ed’s standing in the ruins of the Elric house, Al’s somewhere else standing among some tall square rocks. Flashes of red-eyed Envy, Gluttony, Wrath, Pride, and Uncle (what, no Lust, Greed or Sloth?) A look at Riza’s scarred back with that strange symbol before she turns and I am very sorry for walking in while you were changing ma’am, I’ll be going now. Roy’s still in his eveningwear outfit probably trying to get someone to take all those flowers off his hands, Beard is oh Leto what is happening with your face, are you actually smiling. That looks so weird, stoppit. Oh hey it’s Mama Elric, so sad that we lost you before we could fully appreciate your snark. Ah there’s the scowling Beard that we know, go kick Uncle’s ass. We’ve got Ed jumping and Al and LING YES BRING HIM BACK and a lion and monkey oh my Leto is Al actually going to build a Chimera Army this is the best thing of all time yeah there’s Toad and Boar we are totally getting Rebel General Al. Also there’s Alchemist-Slayer Scar on their side now but who cares CHIMERA ARMY ok fine we also get May and oh Marcoh’s getting in on the action looks like he lost a few teeth wait Yoki no we need you as the secret tactical genius get off the front lines. Selim’s there looking all cute and innocent in his little schoolkid guise until his shadow gets teethy and attacks Ed. Winry’s power walking through a hallway (can’t see if she got her earrings back). Then a bunch of hands reaching up, one larger one grasping a smaller one (which ship will sail?!) before we’re back in the tunnel, shots of Ed and Al and Beard before a final map of the country-sized TC.
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Hey I love your work and I wanna follow more embroidery and cross stitch blogs like yours? Any recs
You bet your butt I have recs! Lots and lots and lots, both here on Tumblr and also on Instagram. I’ve put the list behind a cut as I definitely got carried away and wrote more of a directory/novel–
First of all: if you like the pride flag planets, then you absolutely have to follow @sp8cebit! She makes beautiful pixel art galaxies, and has a stunning pride flag series of her own– and a Redbubble, too, so you can get them as shirts or books or phone cases or all sorts of other cool things. It may not be cross-stitch, but it’s very adjacent.
Also shout out to @scrixels, another brilliant pixel artist who’s been making daily pieces for 500+ days. Check out their massive Octobit piece, this adorable hummingbird, and the Svalbard Global Seed Vault.
Now for cross-stitch blogs:
On Tumblr (this isn’t everyone, not by a long shot! but a good starting list):
@ringcat: tiny, adorable pieces, LOTS of puns, especially food- & coffee-related (this bee!). Lots of good, cute sciencey stitches (Pi-neapple is my favorite). Inspiringly prolific, she’s always making something cool.
@theworldinstitches: really good colors! Does mostly seasonal and geometric pieces, always with a focus on style and color. Great photos too! Check out these sweaters, they look so warm, and also this lil’ cookie guy
@lpanne: has made millions of tiny, intricate fandom people, especially superheroes, animated characters, and wlw (check out her series!), but also several massive Great British Bake Off samplers and a really cool set of stitches from The Martian. Just a really cool and varied bunch of personal projects.
@parvumautomaton: the world’s best Star Wars cross-stitch (for real! look at all of them!), with plenty of birds, animals, and Avatar characters too. This one of Kitty Pryde blows my mind, the 3D effect is too good
@shitpostsampler: the meme the myth the LEGEND. Tumblr text posts turned into an incredible variety of stylish patterns; Batman is a fave, and I’m stitching their ‘No Offense’ piece right now. Patterns are pay-what-you-want on their Gumroad.
@tomkatsumi: innovator and certifiably clever dude, everything he makes has some sort of twist: the codes in his Henrietta Lacks tribute (I’m at 9/10 now, still haven’t got the Roman numerals), a hidden message on a dollar bill, and the entire premise of his Solar Calendar– it takes 164 years if you stick to the schedule. Also very active on Instagram.
@thestitchetywitch: a mixture of quality reblogs and quality original pieces, she posts really frequently and is a great place to discover something new. She’s made a lovely set of pride flag pendants, this beautiful Luna Moth, and a really funny stabby quote
@the-insane-cross-stitcher: Mesothelioma meme! They share a lot of other people’s stitches too, and have really good taste. Good nerd vibes, and also wholesome, supportive vibes.
@ribbonforest: another great place to find new stitching blogs! She reblogs all sorts of pieces: classic, modern, big, small, nerdy, homey… I’m always discovering new artists from the her posts.
@spazinstitches: reblogs all sorts of good cross stitch content: tutorials, WIPs, memes, and all-around cool stuff. The medal in her sidebar says she has one of the top 50 cross-stitch blogs, and you know what? I agree.
On Instagram:
Lord Libidan: video games & pop culture pieces, with a very impressive gallery to look through. Lots of ‘wow factor’– everything’s very big, very small, or very clever, and his Ecruteak model is somehow all three at once. He’s also got a cool space vibe going– check out the Saturn 5 rocket and the USS Voyager.
Stitchrovia: a professional graphic designer, and WOW does it show! Her pieces are always elegantly arranged with perfect colors and typography. I can would and will die for these little bees, and also these foods
Fuzzy Fox Designs: everything is cute and soft and huggable, with big, soulful bambi eyes. Animals, vegetables, cacti and planets– all adorable. Her cute rooms series is endlessly charming AND features a lil’ dodecahedron
Electric naan: currently stitching the Windows 3.1 program manager screen… what more can I say? When it’s right, it’s right.
Zoe Gilbertson: Art, capital-A. Very chill, soothing, and abstract works stitched on spray-painted canvas. Very ‘if Josef Albers lived above a yarn shop and also got into vaporwave’. This one’s my favorite.
Ulla-Stina Wikander: also capital-A, her specialty is household items covered in cross-stitch– like a wrench, a toaster, a cassette player. So far it’s all variations on the same theme, but I’m really, really hoping she’ll extend the concept and someday go full dada.
Dirty Cuss Stitch: funny/clever/cheeky pop culture quotes in great fonts with great colors and great borders, and also great frames. She loves variegated floss more than anyone else on this earth, and knows exactly how to make it look its best: see figs. A, B, and C.
Cloudsfactory: tiny fandom blob people are their bread-and-butter, but it’s their historical patterns that really shine: check out little Grace Hopper, or Rene Magritte, or Andy Warhol and his tiny, tiny soup cans.
Satsuma Street: famous cities and seasonal pieces with a strong sense of color and a storybook style. If you love purple and teal it’s a do-not-miss! Her whole aesthetic centers on vibrancy and strong shapes– very ‘Mary Blair does stained glass windows’, but cross-stitch. I love her Alpine Mountains and her Springtime Rabbit.
Owlforest Embroidery: a Russian cross-stitch blog that posts a lot of folklore pieces. Baba Yaga is just about the only one I recognize, but the style is beautiful. Check out these fairytale houses, and this giant turnip.
The Frosted Pumpkin Stitchery: the duo who inspired me to get into cross stitching 🧡. They’re…. just the best. They make cute themed scenes (Fairytales, National Parks, Fiber Arts) and seasonal sayings (winter and autumn and summer), and their details are always just right. Everything has a concept, a solid color scheme, tons of fun details, a beautiful cover photo, and, most of all, their patterns are designed not only to look good but also to be fun to stitch– no giant blocks of color, just piles and piles of fun little flourishes. I love their work– my dream in life is to see them come out with a math-themed piece.
And a final shout-out to Mr. Xstitch, who showcases modern cross-stitch and embroidery pieces from all sorts of artists. His Instagram is a great place to discover new people to follow, and I’m very partial to his ongoing magazine, too (I am also biased! Some of my own pieces are in it 😊).
Sorry this got so long! Once I started I couldn’t stop thinking of people to list. :) I hope you find some blogs you like! Also, I’m definitely forgetting some people, and also I’m always finding new people to follow, so if you’re reading this, feel free to reply with more recs!
#cross stitch#embroidery#ask#chit chat#long post#whew!#sorry this is so so so long#I started it a couple days ago but kept thinking of people to add!#also I tried to check and get correct info/pronouns/etc for everyone#so if you see a mistake please let me know!#anonymous
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We’ll Carry On - Chapter Fifty Nine
We’ll Carry On Tag
General Content Warnings: Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Substance Abuse, Abandonment, Minor Character Death, Transphobia, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Dissociation, Bullying, Homophobia
May 15th, 2015
Patton was worried about him, that much was obvious. He felt bad about it, because he couldn’t exactly do anything to reassure his brother that he was okay. Virgil was too busy hyperventilating.
His breath was coming in and out funny, and his lips felt tingly, and all this happened because someone slammed a door nearby. He didn’t know why he was so freaked out, he just knew he was. Patton was awkwardly rubbing Virgil’s back, and Virgil appreciated the gesture even if the touch felt a little bit like fire.
When his breathing finally steadied, Patton was looking at him warily. “What just happened, Virge?”
Virgil looked at Patton helplessly. “Sorry, Pat...but...I don’t know.”
January 15th, 2021
Virgil was shaking, just a bit. Just enough for Patton to notice. And Virgil knew that even if Misses Pastor didn’t recognize when he was stressed, not all the time, she recognized when Patton sent Virgil glances. He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. It was just a test that he was doing. It wasn’t life and death, it wouldn’t even determine anything super important in the long run beyond what math help he may or may not receive. Misses Pastor came over and murmured to Virgil, “Are you all right, Virgil?”
“Yeah, I think so,” Virgil said. It was a half-truth. He wasn’t in a full panic attack, not yet, but he was anxious.
“All right. You know that if you ever need to leave the class for a minute, all you have to do is ask,” Misses Pastor said.
Virgil nodded. Misses Pastor was definitely one of the good teachers. She taught the advanced math block in the morning, which he and Patton were both a part of, even though they had unfortunately been separated in their homeroom classes. They both wound up being in advanced classes with Logan and Roman’s tutoring and without worrying about whether or not they’d have the time to do homework. And Virgil had never been more grateful to have extra work, because it meant that he had Misses Pastor.
Turning back to his test, Virgil took another deep breath. This wasn’t life or death. He was scared, and that was okay. It wasn’t a bad thing, it was simply...there. A fact. He took another deep breath and looked at the math problem. They had gone over this, they had to find the area of a circle. He knew that he had to multiply the diameter by pi. And he had pi memorized. This was a problem he knew how to solve.
He did the math quickly and circled the correct answer. There. That wasn’t so bad! And he had plenty of time to finish the last two questions of the text. He continued measuring out his breathing when his anxiety started creeping up, but he was...managing it. On his own. Granted, he was taking some anti-anxiety medications, but he still sometimes got worked up with those medications in place. This was the first time he could ever recall being able to calm himself down from a panic attack before it started.
...Huh. Maybe all that therapy was useful after all. It was just a matter of finding the right person who explained everything the right way.
He worked through the rest of the test and handed it in, heading back to his desk and pulling out scrap paper to doodle on. He really enjoyed getting to draw. He doubted he could make a huge thing out of it, but it was a fun way to pass the time.
When the test was over, it was time for lunch, so Virgil and Patton went to their respective homerooms, grabbed their lunches, and headed to the cafeteria. Fortunately, they didn’t have to sit sorted by class for lunch, since they would be heading to recess afterwards. No one could get confused with which class they had to follow back. Virgil and Patton sat next to each other, just like every day. Patton pulled out a PB&J, and Virgil pulled out a turkey and swiss sandwich, just like every day. But unlike every day, Virgil was fairly relaxed, and wasn’t even shaking from everyone around them being so loud.
“You okay, Virge?” Patton asked.
Virgil nodded. “Yeah, I’m feeling a lot better than I have in a long time. Why do you ask?”
“I noticed you were getting anxious about the test earlier, and I wanted to make sure that you weren’t bottling up your anxiety over it,” Patton said.
Virgil shrugged. “I mean, it’s one test, Pat. Sure, it’ll be a part of my final grade, but we’re only in the fourth grade. It’s not like I’m not going to get into college from missing one or two questions on a fourth grade math test.”
Patton blinked in surprise behind his glasses, and Virgil frowned. “You seem surprised,” he said.
“I am surprised!” Patton exclaimed. “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you calmly explain why what caused you anxiety wasn’t a big deal.”
“Really?” Virgil asked.
Patton nodded.
“Oh.” Virgil took a bite of his sandwich and frowned, chewing food and thought alike. “Well, I’ve been trying to put stuff like that in context for weeks, if not months, you know? Miss Karen is a good therapist, and she’s been helping me go through these exercises that go through situations like that where I explain what would most likely happen, and what the most rational worst-case scenario would be, so even if it’s bad, I’m not...uh...catastrophizing? Yeah, catastrophizing.”
“And it worked?” Patton asked.
Virgil nodded. “It worked really well! I just did deep breaths and went over what I usually say in therapy, and just like that, I was calm again. Like, my anxiety would try and creep back up on me, but I was able to beat it back again and again when I needed to.”
“That’s great!” Patton said, but his voice sounded a little too cheery to be genuine.
Virgil frowned. “I thought you’d be happy for me?”
“I am happy for you!” Patton rushed to assure him. “It’s just...I’m a little worried and I can’t really explain why. I guess I just worry that...if you get better then you won’t need me as much anymore. And I like being there for you, and I like it when you’re there for me. I don’t want that to go away.”
“It won’t go away, Pat,” Virgil said, putting a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “It just means I won’t have to lean on you as much and as frequently as I did before. I still need my baby brother, you’re my partner in crime, the yin to my yang, we’re a package deal! I won’t stop coming to you with stuff, because stuff will come up. But hopefully it will be less anxiety about tests and worrying that people are talking about me behind my back, and more...normal kid problems, like my favorite character in my favorite book being treated badly or being killed off, y’know?”
“Oh,” Patton said, seeming to mull this over. “That’s good, then? We’re still the dynamic-est dynamic duo that has ever duo-ed? You’ll just worry a little less about ‘little things’?”
“Exactly!” Virgil exclaimed. “That’s it! Less anxiety, same me!”
Patton grinned. “That’s amazing, then!”
“I know!” Virgil said, practically bouncing in his seat. “I can’t believe that it actually worked!”
“If anyone could make it work, it’s you, Virge!” Patton exclaimed, taking a victorious bite of his sandwich. “You have the determination to keep at it until it actually works for you! You don’t try something once and give up, you keep at it! And that’s a super good thing!”
Virgil blushed a little and ducked his head. “Pat, you’re playing me up again!” he griped.
“Well, yeah, because you should be played up! You’re the best!” Patton exclaimed.
Virgil huffed and took a bite of his sandwich, but he was smiling regardless. They chatted through the rest of lunch, and headed out to recess eagerly, ready to run around and burn off a little steam.
The best part about recess, though, had to be the fact that they shared recess with the second graders. Which meant that somewhere in the sea of gremlins, there was... “Dee! Lucy!” Patton shouted, waving at two kids by the monkey bars.
Patton and Virgil dashed over, Dee and Lucy were waiting for them with grins on their faces. “Hey!” Dee signed. “We’re learning to read clocks! The ones with the hands!”
“Oh, cool!” Patton exclaimed. “Virgil learned a really neat trick today, too!”
“Really?” Lucy asked. “What is it?”
“I learned to stop my panic attacks before they start, at least a little bit!” Virgil exclaimed. “I think the medication helps take the edge off, but I managed to handle the remaining stress by myself!”
Dee started jumping up and down and made the sign equivalent of applause over and over, before hugging Virgil tightly. Virgil was a little surprised when Dee stepped back, revealing tears in his eyes. “I’m so proud of you!” Dee signed. “That’s amazing!”
Virgil gave an awkward but happy smile. “Yeah, it’s really great. It’s going to come in handy a lot, I can already tell.”
Dee nodded enough to make him look like a bobblehead. “That’s amazing!” he repeated.
Virgil coughed. “Well, enough about me, you guys. What do you want to play today?”
“Ooh! Let’s play pirates!” Lucy exclaimed. “I want to sail the seven seas and destroy my enemies!”
Patton laughed. “I hope we’re not your enemies?” he asked.
“No! You’re my crew!” Lucy exclaimed. “And Dee is my first mate, if you want to be?”
“Yeah!” Dee signed, grinning wide. “That will be fun!”
They climbed onto the tallest structure on the playground, yelling and laughing as they fired pretend canons and did sword-fighting with imaginary swords. Patton was laughing his head off, and Virgil was grinning wide. Playing with the little kids shouldn’t be this fun, or at least, the others in his class didn’t think so. But the younger kids were the ones with the best imaginations, they came up with the best stories to act out! They were fighting a giant kraken today, and tomorrow they might be playing spies, trying to steal the crown jewels or save the world from aliens! It was the absolute best!
They played together until the second graders were called inside, and then Patton and Virgil hung out at the monkey bars, taking turns making their way across. “Are you going to tell Dad and Ami about the anxiety thing?”
“Yeah,” Virgil said without missing a beat. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“Well, you’re sometimes hesitant to share mental health stuff with them,” Patton pointed out.
“This is different, this is positive news. I don’t want to share negative news with them all the time because I don’t want to come across as a bother or something, you know?” Virgil said, holding one arm with his other one.
Patton was so shocked at that statement that he dropped off the monkey bars and slammed into the ground hard. “What do you mean, being a bother?!” Patton asked. “You could never be a bother! You need to tell them to make sure that you’re taking care of yourself! If there’s a lot of bad news, that just means that you need more help! That’s not something to be ashamed of, and it doesn’t make you a bother!”
Virgil shrugged. “I mean, I guess,” he said. “I’m starting to realize that, but—”
Patton walked over to Virgil and gripped his shoulders tight. “No, Virgil, there’s no but’s about this,” he said, his eyes filled with pain and worry. “You’re completely worth it! You need to take care of yourself! You matter, so so much! And there’s nothing to be ashamed of for needing help to take care of yourself. That just means that you’re making doubly sure that you’re okay, and that’s a good thing. That’s a great thing. Don’t downplay it, or yourself, okay?”
Virgil stared at Patton in surprise. He had never seen this kind of intensity in Patton’s eyes before. He only saw glimpses when he...he swallowed. When he put himself down. And Patton was looking like Virgil might break at any moment. Patton was scared that Virgil would end up hurt, or worse, because of his anxiety. Oh. That would definitely explain why Patton had been so worried about him in the past. He was worried about losing Virgil. To better health or to...to worse health.
“Patton, I’m going to be okay,” Virgil assured. “You’re not going to lose me. We’re inseparable, no matter what. And no matter what, I won’t let that change. I can’t promise I won’t hurt, but I won’t let it get the better of me. Okay? Don’t worry about me. We’ll be okay.”
Patton swallowed and gave Virgil a nod. “Yeah, I know, Virge. Doesn’t mean I don’t worry.”
“Yeah, I know,” Virgil said, hugging Patton. “But maybe some of the stuff I’m learning could help you too.”
Patton laughed a little, and he relaxed. “Yeah, maybe. Teach me about it when we get home?”
“Of course,” Virgil said. “Anything for you.”
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WHUMPVEMBER #24: DROWNING
alright this is the Suicide Attempt fic that no one needs or wanted lmao. pls don’t read if this will be triggering for you. also, for those who are reading, i’m not massively proud of this one, but i really couldn’t think of anything else to write. AO3
Tony had been having a particularly good night when he checked Peter’s vitals. He did this occasionally. Peter patrolled like clockwork, four nights a week, and Tony took to checking on the suit once or twice on those nights, just in case he got himself in some trouble and didn’t want to call for help.
They weren’t particularly close, anyway. Tony and Peter kept a distant relationship, like Tony kept with most of the people in his life, and they spoke largely through Happy and the occasional bring the suit by the compound after school so I can fix it texts.
Pepper was curled up on the sofa, Tony’s feet in her lap as some movie he’d stopped watching a while ago played in the background. The compound was as quiet as always, now half the Avengers were gone, and while Tony scrolled through his phone, Pepper typed at her laptop. It was quiet and it was nice – honestly, one of the better nights they’d had recently. There was wine, the lights were low, and at some point Pepper would probably say she was going to bed and then inform him that he was coming with her.
A good night.
But Tony frowned as he logged into the Baby Monitor app he’d made to connect to the Spiderman suit. Peter’s heartrate was off the charts and he’d been sitting in the same spot on the Brooklyn Bridge for almost an hour.
It was almost midnight. The kid’s curfew was at twelve – he wouldn’t be making it back in time if he sat there much longer. Tony scrolled through the protocols and information transmitting from the suit; they listed out one after another. The heater was off. Enhanced Combat Mode was off. Karen – the name Peter insisted on calling his AI – was muted.
Why would he mute his AI?
Tony blew out a breath and elected to call him. This wasn’t exactly unheard of – occasionally Tony would watch Peter’s vitals as he bled out from a stab wound and call the kid, seeing as the kid was insisting on not calling Tony.
Pepper only glanced briefly out of the corner of her eye as he lifted the phone to his ear. He blinked when Peter didn’t pick up.
He hummed and called again. It rang all the way through and timed out. Hey, this is Peter’s phone, please don’t leave a message, just text me. Tony hung up.
“Damn kid,” he muttered, tapping at his phone screen. He wasn’t going to text the kid, no – instead, he tapped along the Baby Monitor app until he was brought to another screen.
“Is he alright?” Pepper asked.
“No idea. Not picking up. I’m gonna force it through.”
This time, Peter wasn’t given the option to decline the call. Rather, it rang twice, as a warning, and then Tony could hear wind and traffic and heavy breathing.
“Hey, Parker,” Tony greeted, mild. “Thanks for picking up at last.” There was a grumble that he couldn’t make out. “Say again?”
“Nothing, Mr Stark,” Peter sighed. “What’s up?”
“I’m just calling because your heartrate is crazy high right now,” Tony said, “and you’ve been sitting on the bridge for an hour. What gives? Are you injured?”
“What? No, no. I’m fine, Mr Stark. Really. I’m just--enjoying the view.”
“Sure,” Tony said, though he didn’t believe it. Peter’s voice held an edge that he wasn’t familiar with. “Enjoying the view. You okay, Peter?”
There was a moment where Peter didn’t speak, a lorry roaring past. “I’m fine, Mr Stark.” Tony hated that he recognised the lie when he heard it. He knew it because he’d sounded the same way before. He’d said the same, defeated I’m fine that Peter was saying, and he knew it meant the opposite. He knew it was a badly concealed cry for help.
Tony didn’t know how to handle this, though. Out of everyone he knew, Tony was the one with issues; Tony was the one barely holding it together. Rhodey and Pepper were the strongest, most collected people he knew, and Happy always had an underlying frustration, but he was never anything but put together.
What Tony knew, however, was that when he was feeling shit, he needed people. They weren’t close, but Tony was still a person with a beating heart, and maybe that would be enough.
“How’s your Aunt?” he asked, sitting up. Pepper looked up just before he pressed a kiss to her temple, covering the receiver with his hand and whispering, “I’m gonna check on him.” She frowned but nodded.
“Good luck,” she replied, as Peter spoke in his ear.
“Uh – she’s alright, I think. Fine, sure. She’s at work right now.”
“She’s a nurse, right?” Tony asked, heading through the living room and towards the balcony.
“Yeah. She’s working like, every day, all the time.”
“When do you see her?”
Peter paused. “Sometimes I see her before school. She takes double shifts and all the overtime she can, though.” He hesitated and Tony waited, slipping out the door and calling his suit to him. “I don’t think I’ve seen her in three days.”
Tony raised his eyebrows. “Three? Really?” He’d gotten the impression they were close. From his research, Peter and May were the last Parkers left standing. The other three had bitten the dust in unfortunate, and no doubt traumatic, manners.
“She was still asleep when I went to school this morning and she was at work when I got back,” Peter said. His voice sounded dull, inside and out, like he was used to this. Like this was just how it went for him.
The pieces of Tony’s suit snapped around him and he caught the faceplate, slipping it on. Tony transferred the call, ditching his phone on the balcony and shooting off into the sky. FRIDAY set a course for Peter and Tony upped the speed.
“And school? How is it? Last time I checked you were top of your class.”
“You checked?” Peter asked. “When was that?”
“Before Germany,” Tony replied, mild. “About the same time I was finding out your home address.”
“Oh. Well. I’m doing okay. I keep missing Decathlon practice – not, not on purpose, but last week there was that weird, giant rat that I had to deal with, so I missed it. And I was an hour late the week before because I got detention-”
“You got detention?” The kid, as far as Tony was aware, was as much of a goody two shoes as you could get.
Peter sighed. “It was a misunderstanding with some late homework. I did it, but my backpack got stolen when I was out Spidermanning so I couldn’t hand it in. So, detention. Late for practice... MJ’s running out of patience for me, I think. She said if I miss this week I’m off the team.”
While they spoke, Tony’s brain was running through the possible circumstances. Reasons why Peter would keep talking when he sounded so down – Tony knew he was a talker, but his rambling was always happy. This sounded like unloading. Like he’d been wanting to talk about a whole lot of things and he’d had no one to say it to. Tony guessed it was May who’d get these conversations, but May was at work 24/7 and Peter had no one to talk to.
Then there was the bridge. Tony didn’t like that they were having this conversation as Peter sat there. He didn’t like the connotations of it.
“When’s the next practice?” Tony asked.
“Tomorrow. Every Thursday after school.” Peter didn’t tend to patrol on Thursdays and maybe that was why. Last week’s giant rat incident had been both unlikely and unfortunate.
“You enjoy Decathlon, right?”
“Yeah. Yeah. It’s fun. But you only stay on Decathlon if you turn up and if your grades are high enough, and…” Peter huffed. The wind picked up in Tony’s ear as the city appeared ahead of him. “I don’t know. I’m trying but it’s just – it’s difficult. I can’t keep my mind in the right place, you know? And there’s- it’s-”
Tony thought he heard Peter sniff and he frowned.
“Hey,” he said, trying to make his voice sound soft. “It’s alright, Peter. It’s gonna be okay. How’s your friend? The- the one that hacked the suit. Ted?”
“Ned.”
“Yeah. How’s he?”
“He’s okay. He’s- he’s fine. He’s not around much right now – he’s in like three times the amount of clubs I am, and he’s getting extra classes for extra credit- I’d do it too but they’re on patrol days, and I’d prefer to be out here, you know?”
“Yeah, kid. You’re doing great as Spiderman.”
“You think?”
“Yeah. You help a lot of people.”
Peter was quiet and Tony tried rerouting more power to the thrusters. He just had a bad feeling in his gut, sinking further and further. There was this ache in the way Peter was speaking. He hadn’t said a positive thing since Tony called him – Peter was always excited about something – and he hadn’t even picked up the first few times. Tony was pretty sure the shiny appeal of Tony Stark hadn’t worn off yet – not picking up the phone was a big deal.
“I prefer Spiderman over Peter Parker,” Peter said, and Tony hated to be right for the first time in his life.
“I don’t,” Tony replied.
“Sure you do. You wouldn’t know me if it weren’t for Spiderman. We don’t talk unless it’s about Spiderman. Spiderman’s the only reason you have an interest in my existence, Mr Stark. I’m not- I’m not judging or anything, but it’s true. And Ned – he loves the fact that I’m Spiderman, but it’s all we talk about. It’s all he wants to talk about, and I’m just- I’m better as him. I am. Penis Parker gets shoved into lockers and beaten up behind the sport’s block. Spiderman actually does something.”
“Peter does a lot, too,” Tony said, but Peter wasn’t stopping.
“There’s just no point, you know? There’s no point in this. If I could be Spiderman all the time, I would. But that’s – that’s not how this goes, and I don’t want to be Peter, anymore, you know? It sucks, Mr Stark. It sucks because I’m stuck being someone I hate.”
“Peter.”
The bridge was still too far off. It was still a good minute away.
“I shouldn’t be bothering you with this,” Peter said. “You’re probably super busy – I’m- I’m sorry. I, uh, I tried disabling the parachute.” Tony’s heart crawled into his throat. He thought he would vomit it up into the suit. “Couldn’t do it without alerting you, so the whole leaping off a building thing wouldn’t work. I wasn’t sure if I’d do it, but I used up all my web fluid so I wouldn’t chicken out again.”
Again, again, again. How many times had the kid sat on the bridge in the last week? Tony hadn’t checked.
Peter was crying, now, and Tony hated the sound of it. There was a sixteen-year-old kid crying to Tony Stark on the phone and Tony couldn’t get there in time. Tony wasn’t sure he’d be able to save him.
“Kid, Peter. Don’t do this. You’re important, you mean something.”
“Thanks for all the help, Mr Stark. Really. It was cool, getting to be Spiderman. I don’t know if you’ll speak to her, but if you do, tell May I’m sorry. I left her a note, but I just- I don’t know. Tell her, is all.”
“Peter.”
Peter made a sound that was too similar to a sob. “I’m sorry.”
The line cut off.
“FRIDAY, all remaining power to the thrusters.”
“It’ll overload them – you’ll only have thirteen seconds before they go.”
“Just do it, FRI.”
The power shot him off through the sky, above the skyscrapers and towards the bridge. At six seconds, he searched frantically for Peter on the side of the bridge where he’d been. The tracker to Peter’s suit led to the water.
At eight seconds, he was plunging into the river, the faint lights of the Iron Man armour shining through the dark. Nine, ten. There was nothing, nothing – then a shape. A figure. A person.
Peter.
The red Spiderman suit looked muddy in the dark, and Tony grabbed onto it, pulling Peter into his arms.
Eleven, he was out of the water. Twelve, thirteen-
The thrusters sputtered out and they freefell towards the bank of the river.
Yelling, Tony grabbed Peter tight in his arms and span until the armour was beneath them, breaking the fall as they landed hard on the concrete bank. The suit scratched and scraped, squealing and sparking as the two of them ground to a stop.
Tony was took three deep, panicked breaths, then asked FRIDAY to open the suit.
Peter had rolled out of his arms somewhere during the landing and Tony scrambled to his feet, running the few metres to where Peter was slumped on the ground.
He yanked the mask off, Peter’s face pale and soaking wet.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck-”
He hadn’t been under that long, right? Ten seconds, maybe. Twenty at a push. Tony shoved cheek close to Peter’s mouth, and when he couldn’t feel any warm puffs of air he went searching for a pulse he couldn’t locate. He never was good at that though, so he tried rolling him into the recovery position, and when nothing happening; when no water poured out of his mouth, he tried CPR.
“Come on, kid, come on,” Tony muttered.
The water that Peter choked up when he started breathing again looked yellow under the street lamps. Tony sat back as Peter coughed, then helped him when he moved to sit up.
“Jesus Christ, Peter, are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
Peter mumbled something, eyes shut, as his soaking head came to rest on Tony’s shoulder.
“It’s alright,” Tony whispered. “You’re okay. You’ll be okay. Things will be better tomorrow.”
Peter didn’t reply, just cried quietly into Tony’s shoulder – whether for the fact that he was alive, or wasn’t dead, or just because there was a deep kind of sadness that was surrounding him, Tony wasn’t sure. But Peter was alive, and there was a chance for things to get better.
Tony would do anything to make things better.
He didn’t know Peter, not really. He knew the facts and figures about the kid. Knew his grades, his resting heartbeat, the amount of times a week he patrolled in a vigilante get-up. But he didn’t know Peter. Didn’t know him as a person, and so didn’t know what the signs would look like when Peter fell into a depressive episode he couldn’t climb out of; didn’t know that Peter wasn’t the kind of person to ask for help; didn’t know the deep-seated feeling of being a burden that weighed on Peter Parker’s shoulders every goddamn day.
But he would.
He would know because Tony would make sure of it. Tony would keep Peter alive long enough to know it all, long enough to learn everything about him and how to help him on the days he didn’t feel like breathing.
And somewhere along the line, Peter would know him, too.
But that night, beside the river Peter had tried to drown himself in, Tony held the sopping wet kid in his arms as he called for a car to take them home. He took Peter to the compound, to a doctor on site, and made a call to May, who sat somewhere in a storage cupboard in a hospital in Queens and cried.
That night, he did what he could. He made hot chocolate, found dry clothes for Peter and let him say as much or as little as he needed to. And when Peter finally fell asleep at three AM on the sofa, Tony carried him the bedroom closest to his own and then went to bed, himself, Pepper asleep by his side, as he read every article and essay on depression, on the feelings that he’d felt himself and Peter was currently, heartbreakingly, feeling, until he had an action plan on how to help.
And the next day, Tony supposed, would be a better day.
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hiraeth | 01
Pairing: Jaehwan x Reader
Genre: Sci-Fi, Royal AU
Word count: 1.7k
Warnings: PTSD mentions
It's a drizzly Friday evening when your past catches up to you.
It's a drizzly Friday evening when your past catches up to you.
The late train out to your neighborhood winds around all the outlying areas surrounding the Armistice mega city, making for a frustrating commute. Being the financial and cultural heart of the United Northern Federation, Armistice is a sprawling metropolis spanning almost twenty-five square kilometers, a melting pot of cultures from all nations. The city swallows up the entire semi-circle coastline formed by the Bay of Sipala and spreads out in all directions, which is a lot to ask for in terms of public transport.
Somewhere halfway through your three-block walk from the subway to your apartment, your phone buzzes in your pocket. Anticipating a co-worker asking for a last-minute code check, you grumble to yourself about being off the clock, but nonetheless tap the screen. The text is from an unknown number.
It’s cold out today.
Another buzz.
You should be wearing a scarf.
Another buzz.
Did you throw out the one I gave you?
You stare at the texts with pursed lips and tensed muscles, waiting for another vibration, but none comes. You immediately block the number, the third one this week, and shove your phone back in your pocket. Quickening your pace, you continue onwards, feeling even more tired than you had a minute ago.
You round the corner to your apartment a good two hours after you'd already left work, the sun long having set. Between your yawning and self-pitying stupor, you don't notice your landlady out to walk her dog until the fuzzy poodle mix runs up to you.
“Hey there, Belle,” you say, bent over to rub the dog's head. Tired as you are, the affectionate canine still manages to elicit a smile.
“Long day?” Your landlady stands with a hand on her hip, tutting mildly. “For such a fancy company, you'd think they could afford to give you more reasonable shifts.”
You straighten back to face her with a rueful smile. “I started barely a year ago, Auntie. Gotta pay my dues and all that.”
TirTech Telecommunications and Security, being a worldwide tech giant, had advertised their cushy benefits and flexible scheduling on all the job sites. However, you are newer hire, a junior consultant, meaning you’re usually saddled with most of the grunt work, requiring long hours in the office. The latest client assigned to you is some alternative banking startup, and their security procedures are essentially made of tissue paper, with all their confidential data on public networks.
She tuts some more. “A young girl like you should be getting ready to go out and do whatever it is you kids do these days, not working late and talking to old ladies like me.”
“You're not even that old, Auntie,” you laugh.
Promising her to take more time for yourself, you head inside, stopping briefly to collect yet more bills from your mailbox. You're so engrossed in reading your credit card company's new payment policy, you almost run into a figure standing at your door. You look up just in time, only to have your world turn upside down.
“Cha Hakyeon.”
The face at your doorstep is from another lifetime. Hakyeon leans on the door frame and flashes his painfully familiar, sheepish grin. “How is my favorite cousin doing?” At your nonplussed expression, his grin falls. “I'm sorry to drop in on you so suddenly. Have you been working late?”
He's answered with silence, your brain still working overtime to catch up.
His gaze softens. “Could we speak inside?”
Shakily, you enter your entry key on the number pad and step inside, followed closely by Hakyeon and a tall, blond companion that you've just now registered.
Your apartment is comfortable by Armistice standards, but right now you may as well be living in a cardboard box.
You're staring, and your eyes seem to be working, but your brain doesn't quite know what to do with this information. Cha Hakyeon, crown prince to the Kingdom of Asadal, and your older cousin, is in your threadbare living room, approximately a thousand miles and three time zones away from where he should be. He glances uncertainly at the blond stranger and takes a seat on your sagging couch. You'd laugh at the contrast between his expensive tailored suit and the blotch on couch cushion next to him where you spilled spaghetti sauce last week, but honestly your brain is still processing.
“What are you doing here?”
He actually pouts, raising his eyebrows up at you in displeasure. You note, with all the absurdity the situation requires, that his brows are meticulously shaped. “Ten years no see and I don't even get a hello?”
“Hakyeon, you're stalling,” says the blond in a sing-song way, still standing next to the prince. Your expression isn't quite a glare, but it's definitely getting there.
Hakyeon sighs. “I won't beat around the bush then. I need your help.”
“What the hell does the crown prince need my help for?” You don't mean to sound as hostile as you do, but a seed of panic has planted itself firmly in your chest.
“My father is a tyrant,” Hakyeon says, his eyes unable to meet yours. “He’s unhinged and dangerous, as you so unfortunately know personally.”
Of course you know. You know your uncle's cruelty and malice the way a shipwreck knows the breaking waves. The panic roots itself in your abdomen as you fight to keep your cool.
The prince stands and begins pacing, still refusing to meet your eyes. “I know I'm asking for a lot. It can't be easy to have me drop in on you out of the blue like this. But know that I wouldn't be here if I had any other options.”
“Spit it out, I don't have all day.” You might mean the hostility this time.
With a sigh he stops to face you at last. “Asadal needs its princess.”
The panic blossoms.
“Get out, Hakyeon.”
“Please!” He steps toward you, and you're forced back against the far wall to put some distance between yourselves.
“Think about what you're asking of me,” you say in a horrified whisper, fighting to stay calm. It's been a while since your last full panic attack, and you refuse to break your streak now.
“I know! I know what I'm asking. Please realize I have no choice, no one else to turn to,” he pleads. Between the tight line of his lips and his clenched hands, you've never seen your cousin this distressed.
“I can't.” You shake your head, willing yourself to keep the tears at bay, but memories resurface unbidden. Your limbs like lead, waking up with your lungs full of water. “You know why I left.”
“You'll be safe, I promise. I already have everything set up, you'll—”
“Hakyeon, they threw me in a river and left me to die!” You don't mean to scream, but it's all you can do to keep it together, eyes screwed closed tightly. He's silent for a second while you do your best to blink away tears.
“I know,” Hakyeon says, ashamed. “I know I can never answer for what my father's done to you and your family. The number of lives he's destroyed can't be counted.” He takes another step toward you and this time you have nowhere left to go. “That's why he needs to be stopped. And I need your help to do it.”
“Am I supposed to just put my life on hold to go help you on this useless crusade?” You're incredulous. “What you're asking for is impossible.”
“We can help make arrangements.” Hakyeon is in his stern prince mode and you know he can't be swayed. “I gave you ten years. All I'm asking for is a couple months of your time.”
The guilt digs in. There are some debts that can't be repaid. Still…
“Hakyeon. This is too much.”
He takes your shaking hands in his, forcing you to look up at him. “I swear on my life you will be safe. I have contingencies prepared for everything. And I brought Jaehwan,” he says, jerking his head toward the blond who has been listening quietly to your family drama this whole time.
Jaehwan gives you a peppy wave and a megawatt smile. You stare blankly, taking your hands out of Hakyeon’s. “Who?”
They both seem surprised. “Really? You don't remember—” starts Hakyeon, then seems to change his mind. “It doesn't matter. Jaehwan is my friend and an excellent bodyguard. He'll be watching over you as a favor to me.”
“I don't know that the king is going to be very afraid of one guy.”
“The king won't even know you're there,” Hakyeon says earnestly. “Please, I just need help gathering people, and maybe breaking into the king’s systems. You work for TirTech, I know you can do it.”
You blink in surprise, taken aback. “How do you know where I work?”
Hakyeon smiles softly, a smile you haven't seen for many lonely years. “You thought I wouldn't be keeping tabs on my favorite little cousin?”
“I'm your only cousin, Hakyeon.” You sigh, exhausted by this whole ordeal.
“Well, you're my favorite anyway.” Hakyeon takes your hand and squeezes softly. “Look, you don't have to decide right now. I have to get back to the Capital tonight, but I'll leave Jaehwan here in the city for the time being. He'll make sure you're safe, and when you're ready, you can make your way back home.”
The mention of “home” brings you a not insignificant amount of discomfort. Taking your hand back, you rub your temples. A mild headache has begun to form, and you still have to address those bills at some point today.
“I don't need a babysitter.”
“I'd feel better leaving him with you. Contingencies, you know?”
You don't argue further, anything for a little peace and quiet. Hakyeon straightens his coat, smiling down fondly.
“I have to go deal with some business now unfortunately,” he says. For a second you think he's going to hug you goodbye, but then he turns to the door, which is already being held open by Jaehwan. “Take care, little cousin. I hope to see you soon.”
You're left in your empty apartment with silence hanging in the air and a storm in your chest.
Next Chapter >>
#vixx#vixx fanfic#vixx au#vixx fanfiction#ken#vixx ken#lee jaehwan#vixx n#cha hakyeon#ken x reader#kpop fanfiction#f: hiraeth#here we go children#thus begins a journey
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Fly Away |Twenty- Nine|
Warnings: Child injury/death
Word Count: 3.5K
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
A/N: I just started school this week and it’s already killing me so I’m sorry if I don’t post very consistently or if my writing is bad. I hope you guys enjoy and if you like it please reblog loves!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
|Masterlist|
|Part Twenty-Seven| |Part Twenty-Eight| |Part Thirty|
____________
I stand on the sidewalk, droplets of rain running past my cotton shirt and the black and blue flannel that is two sizes too big on me. My hair has turned three times darker than usual. The weight of water filling my locks is enough to make the back of my neck ache. Parents and students make this already loud corner of the world even more chaotic. I feel my brain go into overload as I try to focus on one thing.
Instead, a giant wave of wind blows right into my face. The air, thick with water, blows straight into my ears and the noise around me grows ten times in volume. I sigh and bow my head. Droplets of icy water beat right against my nape, pushing fatigue further on me until I feel like dropping onto the sidewalk.
“Hi,” a beautiful voice says, abruptly drawing my attention away from all the obnoxious noise. I’m taken aback when I turn to face the kindest face I’ve ever seen. Her cinnamon lips drawn back on her find face to show me a smile. Hands the color of honey are holding onto each other. She holds her head high, seemingly unfazed by the rain. And her eyes, little orbs of purple that are gleaming with light. She keeps up her chin and extends her small hand towards me.
“You’re Y/N, right?” she wonders. I narrow my eyes and nod slowly, untrusting of anyone who comes up and talks to me so randomly. “I’m Heather. I’m in Mrs. Binford’s class too.”
My arms curl around my torso, this place that I’ve appeared in somehow both hot and freezing at the same time. This place vacillates between the two extreme temperatures as I wander around, unsure of where I’m going exactly. I actually don’t even know where I am for that matter. All I know is that this entire plain of existence is pure, blaring white. For a moment I try to shield my eyes, but the light attacks from all directions, and I defeatedly drop my hand back onto my side.
I continue watching the girl in front of me, who I infer is Indian based on the familiarity between her and the second-grade teacher next to our class who speaks with her native accent proudly and will occasionally pass out embroidered silk in history so that we can all inspect it. My hand raises and I shake Heather’s hesitantly. My sleeves are pulled past the base of my fingers so she can’t feel the thick scars lying just beneath.
“Are you waiting for your parents?” Heather asks and looks at the crosswalk as well. I study the way the rain rolls down her tan cheek. Little white freckles are sprinkled gently under her eyes and across the bridge of her nose reminding me of stars. For being just as young as me she seems otherworldly, and although my dad has never encouraged me to believe in anything besides magic, I know she’s an ancient just from the look of her. She had to have lived millions of lifetimes before this if she can hold her head that high and has such a sing-song voice.
“I’m walking home, actually,” I inform her matter-of-factly and start crossing the street. I’m glad for the constant noise of parents picking up their children disappearing. But Heather follows me, her brown lace-up boots that aren’t meant for the rain splashing into puddles.
“I have to walk a little too,” Heather says while catching up with me. She has to widen her steps to keep up, each pace of mine is a little more than one of her normal ones. “Not home though.”
I cock an eyebrow, surprised to hear that someone my age walks home alone by themselves too. Having become so used to the worried glances from other parents I figured no one else did it.
“You too?”I question. “Your parents let you walk home alone?” Heather laughs abruptly, revealing her pearly white teeth that are all perfectly set into her mouth, not one straying from where it should be. She hikes her backpack up on her shoulders to keep it from falling off.
“Your parents let you walk alone,” she remarks, the bite one would expect in a comment such as that non-existent. The only thing I can find in her whole soul is pure compassion. A love that feels more like family than anything I’ve ever known. “Anyways,” Heather begins and casts her gaze up to a sleek black crow that caws on a telephone wire above us, “we’re not walking alone anymore.”
My fingers dig into my sides, desperate to provide more warmth. I can feel bruises forming under the intensity of my grip so I force my hands up to my face and breathe into them. As I’m doing so an idea pops into my mind. I focus my thoughts and prepare to conjure my magic, only there is nothing to be conjured. All I find within myself is a void of what used to be there. An immortal black hole that looms within, simply waiting for the best moment to take the rest of me away.
I drop my hands enough to stare right at my scarred palms. The angry mark that stretches across the skin to serve as a reminder of what I used to have. Of what I used to be. All I can do is wonder what I am now.
“Oh.”
I nod, my thoughts racing through my naturally anxious mind. Mine and Heather’s eyes stay connected a moment longer before I look back down at the sidewalk. The water has become much less of a menace and even the rain doesn’t seem so troubling anymore. I start walking with Heather, this time slowing down so we can walk side by side.
“So,” I drone awkwardly, still very much unsure on how these “social cues” and “conversations” work, “if you’re not walking home then where are you going.” Heather points forward, not once stopping so she can point out a giant brick building a little way down the road. I eye the giant sports fields and the tall black gates. A blue and yellow flag whips around in the rain wildly.
“My brother is waiting for me there. Midtown high school,” she tells me, the topic already making her excited. “It’s a school for super smart kids. It’s called a ‘STEM’ school.” I think on that for a second, my eyes still fixated on the building.
Tears sting at my eyes now. I feel the need to drop onto the ground and let the chaotic temperature shock me to death. My feet stop moving and I stand in the middle of this infinite wasteland that is nothing more than an abyss to me. I feel my fists shaking by my sides; something that would’ve let my magic loose minutes earlier.
Or has it been hours? I try to think of where I was last. My head to turns to see where I came from but all I see is the white slate. Maybe it’s been more than just hours. I might’ve been wandering this vast place for days, weeks, months. Maybe I’ve been here for years. Maybe all I am is a distant memory to the people I once cared about. Maybe… they’re all already gone and I’m the last one left
“Do you want to go there?” I ask Heather, genuinely curious and not just acting on the few pleasantries I’ve learned. Heather’s smile grows and she nods ecstatically.
“Yeah!” she exclaims, her voice becoming a melody. “I want to be one of those cool hackers like in the spies movies I watch with my dad.” Heather turns towards me and grabs my shoulders all of the sudden. It’s like the joy coming off of her in waves radiates into me, making a smile of my own appear. “What about you? What do you wanna do? Maybe science? I think you’d be good at chemistry. My brother hates that class, but I think you’d be awesome. I quickly become overwhelmed because of her pure curiosity and excitable attitude. My mouth opens then closes, and then I look back at the school.
“I like making stuff,” I reply, thinking off all the things I’ve conjured with magic. Machines, and animals, and plants. “Is there anything for that?” Heather’s smile widens even more.
“Engineering!” she shouts loud enough for the entire block to hear. “You could totally do that! We can go to Midtown together and you can make the machines and I can put the computer stuff into them. We could be a spy team!” I watch as Heather explains what we will be doing the next ten years of our lives, a strange adoration I’ve never known lighting up everyone neuron in my brain.
I run my hands through my tangled hair, yanking some strands out of my school with a soft snapping noise that I can only ignore. Tears begin to fall from my bottom lashes and onto my hot cheeks. My eyes snap around wildly, hoping that if I look hard enough some sort of exit may appear before me. There is nothing though. Just a void for me to lose my mind in. A process that is nearly complete already.
I sit on the creaky swings with Heather. Her raven hair is blown back by the intense winds, revealing how her lavender eyes have focused on something far in the distance. There is a thick book in my lap. One that my teacher recommended that I didn’t read since it was so advanced. My eyes aren’t on the text though. They’re on my best friend of seven months who has not spoken a single word throughout the entire day. I huge feat for her.
“Y/N?” Heather murmurs her first word of the day. I can barely catch my name before it’s taken away by the wind. “Do you believe in reincarnation?”
A crow caws somewhere. My head lifts upwards and I shoot my bloodshot eyes around to find the source. The tears stop falling and I finally have a moment to breathe in and out, accepting the air that has somehow turned to a consistent temperature of about twenty degrees. A smile spreads over my lips as I stare towards an invisible horizon, prepared to see a beacon of hope in a place that I believed sucked hope dry.
I’m immediately taken aback by Heather’s question. My eyes study Heather whose brows have been knitted together as she gazes at the hazy horizon with clouds building over every skyscraper in sight.
“I guess so.” I remember when I first met her. How I automatically knew that she was an old soul by the way she held herself and spoke. To this day, I’m still a firm believer of that fact. “Why are you asking?" Heather bites the inside of her cheek, asking herself whether or not she should answer.
“Last night my brother said that it was all a lie. My religion,” she informs me. I twist the chains of my swing further so I can face her entirely. “He said there is no Kali or Ganesha and that there definitely isn’t reincarnation. He said it’s all a big fat lie to keep me from being bad.” I see the tears rimming her gleaming purple eyes. It takes every ounce of control I have in my small body to keep my panic from revealing itself.
I push myself forward on the swing, taking my time to think of an honest answer for Heather because that is what she deserves. “I think he could be right,” I answer, “but I also think that you could be right. I don’t think we’re meant to know for sure if there is someone special out there watching over us.” I bite my lip and shrug, taking a moment to close my book. “That wasn’t very nice of him to say that though, and I think that’s what made him wrong. No one knows that truth for sure. We just have faith. Some people have faith that there are gods, others have faith that there is one god, and some people have faith that there isn’t. We can only have faith in what we believe is right.” I watch the skyline too now, the beauty of the sun dipping below the buildings unbelievable.
The caw grows louder and I can hear the beating of wings as my friend approaches from wherever she may be now.
“You are allowed to believe whatever you want to believe and no one can take that away from you,” I reassure before taking her hand in mine and looking back at the schoolyard where other kids play.
Then we’re silent again. Heather’s raven black hair is blown backward by the wind. We both swing back and forth simultaneously as to not put any strain on each other’s arm.
“I’d like to be reincarnated as a crow,” she mumbles randomly. “I like crows. They’re pretty and smart.” I smile and look at my best friend.
“You’d be a really good crow,” I say back, confidence lining each letter. I think of what I’d like to be reincarnated as. I’ve never taken too much of an interest in most animals until Heather began pointing them all out to me, calling them by both there scientific name and short names. I think if I wanted to be reincarnated as anything, I’d want to be Heather’s sister.
Heather purses her lips, a habit I had noticed her mother doing when she would occasionally pick her up from school. She turns towards me, the chains holding the swing up creaking quietly. “Do you believe in magic, Y/N?” she asks. Her eyes lock onto me. I look down at my muddy shoes as I swing forward a bit, the only thing reminding me not to go so high I could fly away being the strain of Heather’s hand holding mine. Once my feet rub against the wood chips again, sending them flying to the sides, I look around.
“Icarus!” I shout, my voice cracking with every syllable but I find that I don’t care. I can hear my friend coming to me. Her wings flapping as hard as possible to reach me.
I twist towards Heather again, this time an intensity has settled into my eyes. “You have to promise not to tell anyone, okay Heather?” My friend gives me a confused look. “You need to pinky promise you will never, ever tell another soul about what I’m going to show you. Do you pinky promise on your life you won’t?” Heather glances around, almost looking for confirmation of what I just said.
“Yes?” she whispers back, the response sounding more like a question than a promise. I accept it though and pull my hands away from the metal chains. Hesitantly, I cup them and place them against my lips, beginning a simple conjuring spell. I watch closely as the young me executes the spell completely and places her two closed hands in Heather’s open ones. Slowly, she opens them, revealing a tiny butterfly.
“Icarus!” I try again. My hair whips over my face as I turn quickly, the direction fo where the noise is coming from still hard to decipher.
Heather’s jaw drops as she looks at my creation. I can’t help the smile that spreads across my lips as she raises the butterfly to inspect the small thing. I giggle lightly and raise her hands into the air, releasing the butterfly so that it may fly somewhere where it will be safe from the strong winds.
“So,” Heather drones as she watches the dark blue creature disappear, “you’re like a witch.” I chuckle again.
“I guess,” I confirm. “I like to think I’m a good witch though.” Heather’s grip on my hand tightens and she pulls me closer, nearly yanking me right off the swing.
“You’re like Glinda,” she yelps joyfully. “Glinda the good witch!”
One last screech is released into the void, the noise reverberating all around me. Then the beating of wings finishes and I’m left to wait and see if what I heard was real and not just me going mad.
All of the sudden I feel a pulse of energy behind me. I don’t dare turn around out of fear of what it could be. My father, done tormenting me and finally collecting me from this place so that he can take me to his "utopia". Dormammu, who has broken his promise and instead trapped me here with him so he may torture me with my own deepest fears. My friends. My family, standing around me, all of them dead because there was never any hope of us all surviving in the first place.
“Hey Glinda,” a melodious voice says behind me, shocking me straight from my imagination. I dare not turn around as I track the familiarity of the voice. I think of how every syllable sounds like a ballad, how there is a natural trill in her voice one would believe took years to master. I think of her voice, an eternal hymn that people sing on their holy grounds. My heart skips a beat, then another, and then it starts racing again, the realization dawning over me like the sun rising over the New York skyscrapers.
I walk past the alleyway next to our deteriorated apartments. It takes me only a second to sense something wrong before I turn down the dark street. Then I see them. My father and Heather. She has her hands weakly raised above her head, fearing and preparing for the next blow.
I stand and take a deep breath before finally turning to look her in the eye. Her pale purple irises stare right into mine, unafraid to look at me after so many years of being apart. She has developed a natural wave in her once entirely straight, obsidian hair. It dips just past her shoulders. Her smile is glowing with pure white teeth, the sight of something so sincere so striking in this strange place.
He doesn’t go for her head though. He conjures a blade in his hand instead and thrusts it straight into her abdomen. And then everything's a blur.
My magic thrumming inside as I use it to throw him away from my best friend. My sister. He flies ten yards and then collides with a brick wall. Even though I have stopped him I know I haven’t won because I see Heather gasping for air. Her entire face coated with her own dark blood, her hand reaching towards me, and the beautiful purple I love more than anything in the world, the strange and lovely mutation she was named for is fading from her eyes, and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
All I can do is cry as I drag her to the hospital, praying that she’ll get the chance to be reincarnated as a crow.
I take one step forward, then another, and then I feel as though I’m floating towards the girl who has, despite the four-month difference, grown slightly taller than me. She waits, patient as ever while I approach, fearing deep in my heart that if I go to quick she may disappear like she did all those years ago. All of the sudden, I’m standing right in front of her. My hand lifts without my permission and brushes against the skin of her shoulder, testing to make sure she isn’t an illusion.
“Heather?” I ask finally. Her smile grows wider somehow as she opens her arms to embrace me.
“I'm here,” she begins, "and you can always call me Icarus if you like that better." And then I’m hugging her tight. Tighter than I’ve ever held anyone. Heather laughs happily and pulls me against her as well, and suddenly all the pain of carrying her quaking body into the hospital emergency room fades. I can no longer feel the way her blood felt coating my hands or the way she whispered my name as the nurse brought her to the emergency room.
And there are so many questions I could ask. How long has she been with me for? Did she plan on falling into the courtyard that day or was that a simple coincidence? How many times did she come back? How many times until she finally came back as the crow? As my Icarus?
I find no reason to ask though. Heather’s here now. My sister, who was the first member of my peculiar family is holding me against her no longer petite body, her love for me rolling from her heart in droves and warming up every aching muscle in my body. As she and I are clinging to each other I think of every crow I ever saw after her death. I think of them all as Heather. Heather watching over me every day like a guardian angel. Heather coming back over and over again as her favorite animal, becoming my own personal flock to protect me no matter what.
____________
A/N: First thing first, Heather is based off a character in the book I’m writing. Secondly, she’s going to be really important to the story line if I decide to do my really stupid thing! YAY❤️❤️❤️
If you would like to be tagged shoot me a message in my inbox or comment below. Please reblog if you guys enjoyed to let others know about the story.❤️❤️❤️❤️
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