#i am feeling things lately | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kaeyachi · 1 year

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-“Though we could not restore Khaenri'ah to life, we of the Alberich Clan should lead lives as those who blaze like fire, rather than those who wallow in the embers.”-

Kaeya is not afraid of fire.

How could he ever be afraid of it? Fire reminds him of home, after all.

It reminds him of the scorching sun in the summer, the perfect time to visit the beach and collect seashells.

of the nights when he and Diluc would sneak around the mansion, way past their bedtime, with only a single candle to help them see.

of the day Diluc received his vision. It was a joyous occasion for the entire family. It was a proof that Diluc is a step closer to becoming a captain in the knights.

Even after being faced by the fury and power of that said vision, pyro, he still approaches fire, like a moth to a flame.

He'd pair up with Amber on missions occasionally. He enjoys teasing and pranking her. The work is far more entertaining when she's around.

He'd spend the time helping Bennett with using his sword. He'd even join him on adventures to make sure he's safe if he could spare the time for the young adventurer.

He adores Klee so much that it hurts. He loves babysitting her and caring for her. He wants to keep her fire safe from the horrors of the adult world for as long as possible.

And no matter how unrecognizable his relationship with Diluc now seems to be, in the remains of that one tragic day, he still gravitates towards him. Frequent visits to Angel's Share and Dawn Winery by his choice, and when fate is feeling playful, they'd get pitted with each other, as if they were fated to be doomed together.

So no, Kaeya is definitely not afraid of fire at all...

...he worries that he loves it a bit too much, actually.

He worries that the words of his birth father stuck to his mind like a leech. He worries that the allure of the feeling of warmth would someday burn him to a crisp. He worries he'd throw himself into the fire if it means to keep that fire burning.

His cryo vision just makes him ache for the flames even more.

With growing horror, he realizes that he'd willingly face the fire time and time again.

#kaeya #kaeya alberich #kaeya headcanons #kaeya angst #i totally forgot i could tag that oops #i am feeling things lately #he should be afraid of fire based from his history and yet he seems to stick to pyro characters a lot which formed this idea #pyromaniac kaeya but we dont notice because he uses cryo to smother the flames quickly lmao #kaeya loves fire there i said it

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egophiliac · 7 months

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so excited for Kalim to save the day by swiper-no-swiping this dip. you can do it! I believe in you!

god I hope this reads properly

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #stage in playful land #stage in playfulland #i feel like kalim and the marshmallow test operates under roger rabbit rules #whether he passes or fails depends on which option is funniest at the time #anyway HEY things are finally actually happening!#so glad fellow agrees with me there #did he even expect them to make it to the show. did he very quickly have to choreograph a poppy little dance number.#honestly in retrospect i am also shocked that they lasted as long as they did #i mean. floyd is there. c'mon.#speaking of which i did really enjoy floyd going BYE JADE! MAYBE I'LL COME BACK TO SAVE YOU LATER IF I FEEL LIKE IT!#revenge for the popcorn #sorry if this is nonsensical! somehow it became like 4 am while i wasn't looking #i am super digging the evil theme park shenanigans (now that they're actually happening)#it's just Very Late!

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arsenicflame · 11 days

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Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?

#ive been super curious about this because people seem to have really strong opinions on the queue! so many people seem to HATE it #but i love using the queue! i dont really know exactly why i like it so much- i started using in like... 2016 and its a fundamental part of #my tumblr experience now. i think i started off just using it for offline hours so id hit most my american mutuals (/ for aes posts)#but these days basically everything goes in my queue (cept time sensitive things & like. current hype and original posts-#anything 'normal' posting is in the queue)#idk it feels. nice to me! i like to spread out my posting and not rb 30 things in half an hour and then disappear for the rest of the day #esp since my spaces are so circular- the same post runs on my dash a dozen times minimum. and i get to put it on ur dash a week late!!!#and its so nice to have small interactions with mutuals in incompatible timezones; to open up my notifications in the morning #and go: oh! my friends were here <3 #its such a Part of the tumblr experience for me i dont think i could ever truly change now. maybe switch to timed queueing #but my availability changes so much i prefer to just. know i guess #but (i am so sorry for all that) im curious about how other people feel!!!!!! itd be so interesting to hear abt why people do/do not like i #i know some people like the experience of spamming and going. some people think it makes this seem to much like influencing or whatever #everyone has their reasons and i want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#nyxtalks #poll #queue #no see answers option because you must fall into one of these

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inkskinned · 1 year

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i keep thinking about hobbies and how i often spill over myself to pick up new ones. i have adhd, i end up trying something for like a month and then just getting far enough in it that i move on, satisfied.

and that should be fine; but it's never fine.

i am a pretty decent artist; but i can't just make art for my dnd campaign, i should be selling dnd maps and character designs and scene setting pieces. i can't just make my friends matching earrings, i need to get an etsy and ship them internationally and take bulk orders. i make pretty good props and decorations and use them to throw my friends parties - but i should be running a party planning business and start taking paying clients and networking and putting my skills to actual use.

for some reason, i never figured out the specifics of pottery. it was a fun class and i enjoyed myself - and still, i'm embarrassed, years later, that i put in all that useless effort. everything i make has to be stunning. stellar. i should have applied myself more. maybe i'm too lazy. maybe i'm broken and selfish and needy. actually creative people would have kept going; they would be bettering themselves at every possible opportunity.

we find ourselves in this trap, even accidentally: we need to commodify our time, because it is a commodity. if we spend our efforts and our time not earning, isn't that the same thing as burning free money? and god forbid you ever take up a hobby that ends up being more expensive than you thought. you sit in your car and you look at the receipt and in your head you hear a conversation that isn't even happening - your mom or your friend or your partner all saying oh great. not this shit again. it's always something with you, and it never actually means anything.

i have realized this horrible thing, recently - i'll get excited to start a project, pick up a new hobby. and then i just... stop myself. i start thinking about the amount of time it will take, and how it'll look in my monthly budget. what if i can't even produce a good enough final product. sure, it's exciting to think about how i could make my friend her own custom dice. but i'm just polluting the earth if i don't get it right. better not bother. better not try.

restless, i get caught in the negative space. the feeling that oh god, i want to create. and that horrible sense - yeah, but i don't have the time to just put to waste.

#hobbies #writeblr #what stage of weirdness to write about hobbies on my hobby writing blog #although i know OBJECTIVELY i am a creative person #i often forget to label myself that bc i don't feel im an ARTISTIC person bc i don't do anything like that professionally #writing doesn't even feel like a hobby i think that surprises nobody for me to be like #it would be easier for me to stop . like. breathing.#which feels cheesy and trite but listen im running late for a meeting and all i really want to say is like #i couldn't even consider writing my hobby bc it makes my skin crawl bc it makes it sound like it's not important to me #bc we really devalue hobbies. like entirely.#it HAS to be a job. it must #also idk if this is clear but i personally get stuck in this space where i CANT create bc i am putting so much pressure on myself #to make it RIGHT #and im like ... idk i only have an hour #so probably shouldnt get involved in this thing

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journey-to-the-attic · 28 days

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uh oh

#art #obey me #obey me raphael #jtta ik #forcing myself to have a go at shading things. if i never try i will never get better!!!!!!!#mind if i brain dump real quick bc i've been thinking lately about how i refer to myself as a writer but never an artist #whenever i mention it i always say 'i draw stuff' or 'illustrate' instead #it's not like i feel particularly inferior about how i draw bc of course! i haven't gotten around to even touching an art course!!#but to me 'artist' encapsulates a sort of abstract skill and i always feel like i draw much more objectively #it is just The Thing That I Am Depicting and that's prob why i have such trouble with shading and any non-literal colouring #the best thing i've made so far is that one satan thing and i have yet to remember how i managed that #anyway i've been trying some new stuff out!! slowly but surely #that's all mostly stuff i'll keep to myself though #anyway if you actually read through all that Thank you i love you

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ewwww-what · 2 months

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What a cool dude, I hope he isn’t haunted by memories of his dead friend lol

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toytulini · 11 months

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listen im ace and im pro kink at pride and whatever, but the way some of yall are wording your posts in response to the backlash against it is uh. really taking me back to the ace shitcourse era.

yall know theres nothing wrong with being a "virgin", right? that its not inherently shameful to have not had sex, to never have sex, even if youre not ace, even if you do want to have sex someday, like, its fine that you haven't had sex?

maybe if your problem is that theyre trying to police your behavior and shame you for expressing your sexuality, you can say that? instead of resorting to "haha stupid virgin gets no bitches" like my god. do you not hear how fucking regressive that attitude is? i know, i know, youre "joking".

get a better joke

#toy txt post #god im going to regret this post im gonna regret it so much i can feel it in my bones #let it flop..........pls #internalize my message let it sink in and understand what i am saying and then let the post flop #i say. knowing the ppl who need to see such a message are the ones who will make me regret this post and regrwt not having #1 million bajillion disclaimers #virgin is in quotes bc its a bullshit made up stupid purity culture concept anyway and quite frankly i hate even seeing the word #disclaimer: the previous sentence is not me saying that it is a slur for asexuals. it is me a single individual saying this specific word #grosses me out to read and see everywhere when its a stupid bullshit binary made up or at least historically largely used #to shame largely women and i dont know why we're still using it in 2023 #and ive just been. seeing such an uptick in this whole like. attitude? lately and like #im ace im minorly sex repulsed. mostly about anything sex at me bad. other adults sex at each other consensually? go wild #i like to think im pretty chill about it. i try to be. i think its fine ig to be like 'my meat is huge i fuck so much so good'#like okay not my thing but good for you. love that for you #but then some of yall have started turning it back around back to. 'haha your meat so small and shriveled you get no bitches'#'haha stupid incel virgin' like okay. didnt realize we all went back to fucking. middle school but okay #god im gonna run out of tine to get ready for my thing writing this stupid post UGH evil #but like idk we've kinda circled back to being like haha being a virgin still is stupid and silly and shameful #and if im quite honest. i do think the acecourse played a part in that bc i felt like we were making good progress in like #hey guys is fine to not have sex ever if you dont want to its fine to not want sex its fine #and then aphobes went fucking rabid on us and splintered and destroyed online communities all over but especially on tumblr #and so many aces went back in the closet we stopped talking about it we stopped spreading awareness and now this stupid goddamn like #and now this stupid bullshit attitude is back where its like funny to call someone a virgin as an insult but like no bro trust me its okay #its okay for me to do it bc im a hot queer person with huge meat instead of a cisstraight frat bro with huge meat #? like you know the issue was the behavior right? not the fact that it was straight dudes saying it? its bc the thing being said was shitty?#you know you can dunk on the puritan bitches trying to police your behavior at pride without getting us as collateral damage right #stop making me read that stupid ugly ass word ur not cool or funny #whatever #if you come on to this post to start shit i will not only block you but as many of your mutuals and followers as i can find. i will scroll #i will block this entire fucking website if i need to do not test me. i am exhausted and the acecourse ate up all my tolerance in 2015.

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bit-odd-innit · 1 year

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I know the common headcanon is Steve can cook and Eddie can’t but CONSIDER: The Reverse.

Steve who has no idea what to do with that big empty kitchen, who subsists on frozen meals and take out and leftovers from Mrs. Henderson. Eddie who knows how to stretch a meal to make it last, who taught himself to get creative with the limited resources at his disposal. Eddie who uses Steve’s kitchen to make him a home cooked meal. Steve who eats it and tells him he loves him for the first time.

#stranger things #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #I am in my FEELINGS about domestic Steddie lately

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 5 months

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Izutsumi character study

#dungeon meshi #izutsumi #One of my goals for this year was to spend more time doing art studies.#What better way to start than with my favourite danmeshi character (not seen: a whole page of figuring out her features)#I feel like she is by far one of the most poorly understood characters in the series. Partially due to her 'late party member' status.#'She's abrasive and mean' - 'she's a picky eater' - 'she's a catgirl who acts like an asshole cat ' YES and that is the point!#Everyone in dungeon meshi is traumatized and messy about it but izutsumi is just less polite in how she tries to cope.#Izutsumi is a extremely traumatized teenager who has utterly lacked autonomy her entire life.#She is the epitome of a “If I can just have X thing then all my problems will be solved!” character. And the X is 'Freedom'.#Her epilogue was one of the best and wrapped up her character so wonderfully (WARNING: I WILL NOW SPOIL PART OF THE ENDING)#Because she finally gets her freedom! She can go where she wants to and she doesn't need anybody! Yet...it doesn't fix her.#She is so focused on doing only what she wants that she forgets her own needs. Sometimes you have to eat the things you don't want.#And sometimes you have to face the hard truths that you need more than just one thing to make you happy.#Life is not all about only seeking pleasures and avoiding pain. You need to be balanced in order to grow.#Eat your vegetables (including the metaphorical ones: I am eating more art veggies this year by doing art studies!!!)

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sensitiveheartless · 1 year

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StressTM

#I’ve gotten a ton of nice asks lately sorry I’ve been slow responding to them!#I am currently feeling like this ^ so it might take longer than usual for me to get to things #I’m fine I’m just feeling like a small skittish animal #~ ✨life events�� ~#my art #bsd #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs

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royalarchivist · 2 months

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Pac: Oh, Nenê... How cute... 🥺💕

After dying to an atomic creeper in a cave and stressing over potentially losing all his items, Pac returns home to set his spawn and receives a sweet surprise:

His cat falls asleep on top of him and purrs when he goes to bed :')

#QSMP #Pactw #Pac #March 28 2024 #I had the exact same reaction as Pac my heart frickin melted THIS IS SO CUTE.... AND THE PURRING.... MY HEART #I desperately wish Pac got to hang out with Madagio (in his cat-form)#because cats clearly adore Pac just as much as he loves them #Maybe in an alternate universe Madagio spent a day with Pac #And in that time he learned why Fit came to care for this man so much #I don't need more WIPs on my plate but I am Pondering the idea #If the cat-hybrid Cellbit thing was canon I could crack a joke about the ''cats clearly adore Pac just as much as he loves them'' thing #but alas #For real though lock Madagio in a room with Pac for 12 hours and he'll leave being grudgingly charmed by him #aghhhh #Anyways this is so cute #but also really sad #because how many times do you think Pac's been in his room depressed over his missing son / friends / roommate #only to have his cats burrow under his arm and nudge their way onto his lap?#Don't get me started I'm feeling Emotional about cubito Pac lately

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goldensunset · 3 months

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joining the war on autism on the side of the autism etc etc

#i’m never drawing again i swear (lie) (i enjoy suffering)#n harmonia #natural harmonia gropius #zekrom #pokémon #pokemon #pokemon black and white #pokémon black and white #pkmn bw #pokemon bw #my art #bw #AAHHHHGHGGGHGH blorbo. i’m very tired but like #i have to commemorate every game i play!#i would say i am this guy’s biggest fan but i’m like 13 (14?) years late to this party i know i’m not #i haven’t even put scratched the surface of blorboposting yet i’ve seen some wild and good stuff out there i gotta step up my game #hope this looks ok i was kinda rushing to get it done while it’s still february lol #(i have a self imposed rule that i have to draw at least one thing a month)#zekrom can be wildly too small to scale. as a treat. i needed it to fit in the frame LOL #i’m quite proud of this i think. we’ll see how tomorrow’s me feels!#usually i regret posting something immediately after finishing it esp when late at night but as i said i’m rushing lol #one of the first pokémon i’ve ever drawn and it’s a Complicated Legendary. goody #but like look at my boy n right #[edit: fixed a few minor issues]

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dreamsy990 · 3 months

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some of the less nice thoughts about being aroace

extras below the cut

sketch

closeups on my favorite panels

bonus: adios

#doodles #kingdom hearts #roxas #axel #olette #aromantic #asexual #aroace #do i tag pence. hes in the background of one panel #ehhhh sorry pence no tag for you #also not tagging soriku and namixi #i mean by the logic of 'theyre in one panel so i wont tag them' i also shouldnt tag axel but. he has dialogue so #anyways i have a very irrational love of olette whenever i need a random side character in a kh comic? olette #i think she uses webmd. anyways im done talking about olette #so let me clarify about this comic #im aroace. this is all just things ive thought before #im not saying in any way these thoughts are real. theyre just thoughts #thats why it ends with 'but there isnt. its just me.' there IS nothing wrong with being aroace. even if it feels like it sometimes #im not trying to send a message im just trying to express a feeling ive had for a while #anyways. the aroace community is super positive and i like that. but not everything i feel about it is that positive #sometimes it feels like im missing something yknow #this comic seems like its about roxas. but its about me. congrats youve been fooled #drafted something similar to this for aro week but didnt finish it in time so this is spiritually part of asaw 2024 #btw sorry im not posting as many drawings lately #schools kinda stressful im pretty tired and busy most the time #i am throwing this drawing to you like a slab of meat to a pack of hungry dogs. take this meager ration in these trying times #alright i think thats it bye now

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kingofthecapybaras · 25 days

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lyrics from time adventure by rebecca sugar, 16/04/16 (jack’s song) by cavetown, and everything stays by rebecca sugar

little kinda-sorta webweave thing i threw together with some lyrics i’ve been thinking about in relation to leo leaving/the eggs leaving in general. sorry that 2 of them are songs from adventure time by rebecca sugar but in my defense: they are good songs

#qsmp #qsmp leonarda #qsmp leo #qsmp foolish #i feel kinda lame making this bc these r all songs ive loved since i was like. a cringey middle schooler. and i think u can tell #but whatever i am feeling emotions abt blorbos and the absolute state of things in general lately and this is how i am coping so. here

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lonicera-edulis · 4 months

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Finally figured out a design for Perry. And this piece can be concidered an art for HobbitCember Prompt Challenge, Shire Fashion.

#sansukh #HobbitCember #I wanted to do these prompts but I am late as usual #I will make other few prompts later #I still need to finish hobbits with kids and boffins fam from lotro and I think I can fit them in this challenge too #gimizh is literally a mix of gloin gimli and bofur I don't know #perry is a took but I decided to give him a distinctive nose and hairstyle #actually I had a controversial feeling about their story #first how am I supposed to read Gimizh and think of an adult dwarf now #second I was opposed to another hobbit/dwarf thing (but this opinion of mine contradicts with the whole idea of sansukh and tasâlalkhud)#like isn't it enough it happened once #but I like both perry and gimizh so let it be

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scintillatingshortgirl19 · 6 months

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i am begging one single person in this entire show to consider, for perhaps one single second, THE POSSIBILITY THAT THERE IS A REASON HOUSE HATES HIS DAD THIS MUCH

#everyone is so dreadfully shocked and confused by him not wanting to go to his own father's funeral #but not no one makes any real effort to find out why #and that's not to say house would actually talk about it #(though tbh he might if someone asked in a genuinely nonjudgmental way. and he does tell wilson a couple of things.)#but either way it just feels like everyone is assuming #that house is just being an asshole for the sake of being an asshole #and it has occurred to no one that house's late father could possibly be at fault for his son not wanting to attend his funeral #i just. it would be nice if someone would consider the notion #that a person not wanting to be at their parent's funeral might have a valid reason for that #(like abuse. or something)#anyway this was a good episode #i'm always up for for daddy issues and hilson road trips #(i am considerably less up for forcing abuse survivors to honor their dead abusers)#house md #house season 5 #house 5x4 #op #john house

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