#i would say i am this guy’s biggest fan but i’m like 13 (14?) years late to this party i know i’m not | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

maticide666 · 3 years

Text

my eurovision top 39 songs (finally)

anyway i finally got my top 39 completed. under a read more because it can get kinda long with the commentary i added klfdja;sflk (and by that i mean VERY long, maybe a wall of text if i have a lot to say about the song.)

none of this takes rehearsals into account.

basically, 39-37 i don't like, 36-35 are meh, 34-25 are decent, 24-18 are good, 17-12 i enjoy listening to a lot, 11-4 i love, and I would pay for votes for top 3 if i could.

39. Azerbaijan - Efendi - Mata Hari - Honestly, I kinda want to like this song. The instrumentation is nice, especially with the Azeri instruments. Efendi's vocals are ok during the verses. However, her vocals during the MA-MA-MA-MATA HARI part makes this song utterly unlistenable for me. It is just so distracting and ear-grating. Not great for my sensitive ears. And that is without taking anything else into account.

38. Estonia - Uku Suviste - The Lucky One - For some reason reminds me of a boring modern country song. Bland af. At least the melody of the chorus is nice.

37. Cyprus - Elena Tsagrinou - El Diablo - Discount Lady Gaga at the best points of this song. Feels like three songs at once. Also, the lyrics seem like they just went all "What Spanish-sounding words sound spicy? Taco? Tamale? Mamacita?" As a Spanish speaker and as someone of Mexican descent who enjoys those foods, this annoys the living shit out of me. At least I can make El Diablo/Fallen Angel memes out of this. (Honestly, I don't mind the gratuitous Spanish with the words El Diablo.) Also, this song got real old real quick.

36. Slovenia - Ana Soklič - Amen - The gospel vibe is nice, but there is just too much Christianity in it for me to enjoy this song. Sorry, Ana.

35. Moldova - Natalia Gordienko - Sugar - Sounds like a sugary version of Siren Song by MARUV. Kinda boring, but enjoyable in the right circumstances.

34. Georgia - Tornike Kipiani - You - Good to listen to when mind feels blank. At first I kinda liked this song, but nowadays this song has lost its charm. This won't sound out of place alongside boring 70s slow classic rock songs.

33. Austria - Vincent Bueno - Amen - Not something I would listen to regularly, but still nice. For me, easily the biggest downgrade from 2020.

32. Greece - Stefania - Last Dance - Pleasant to listen to, not much else.

31. Portugal - The Black Mamba - Love Is On My Side - Good song, but not my cup of tea. Unfortunately, some great songs have to be near the bottom of my ranking.

30. Germany - Jendrik - I Don't Feel Hate - A fun song to listen to. The novelty wears off after a while. The feel good vibes and ukulele are nice.

29. Israel - Eden Alene - Set Me Free - the song release version was bland and boring, but the revamp. Now THAT is good stuff. The song doesn't seem so empty anymore. I miss the key change from the original, though.

28. Spain - Blas Cantó - Voy A Quedarme - A very emotional and beautiful song from Spain. Again, not usually my cup of tea. However, the melody somehow gives me a nostalgic vibe.

27. North Macedonia - Vasil - Here I Stand - DAMN Vasil has a lovely voice. Nice that he's showing it off here. Too slow of a song for me to enjoy regularly, though.

26. Albania - Anxhela Peristeri - Karma - I don't have much to say other than this song is nice.

25. Bulgaria - VICTORIA - Growing Up Is Getting Old - Pleasant to listen to, but depending on my mood I think this is a beautiful song but not my cup of tea or a complete snoozefest.

24. Serbia - Hurricane - Loco Loco - Fun song, but it feels like something is lacking, and I can't quite put my finger on it.

23. San Marino - Senhit - Adrenalina - Once the initial hype from Flo Rida being on the song died down, this became another typical Eurovision bop.

22. Sweden - Tusse - Voices - At first I thought the song was completely unremarkable and couldn't understand how this won Melodifestivalen. Nowadays it's a nice song to chill to. I gotta respect a perfect televote score from the national final.

21. Ireland - Lesley Roy - MAPS - nice.

20. Croatia - Albina - Tick Tock - Grew on me slightly. Shoutout for including a verse in Croatian.

19. Switzerland - Gjon's Tears - Tout l'Univers - Another grower for me. Doesn't hit as hard as his song from last year, but I dig it.

18. France - Barbara Pravi - Voilà - Lovely chanson right here. I wish it didn't take forever to pick up, though. I was about to completely give up on this song in the middle of my first listen. I'm glad I didn't.

17. Belgium - Hooverphonic - The Wrong Place - Classy. Not much else to say.

16. Ukraine - Go-A - Shum - I'd definitely go rave to this song. I kept finding this song hard to rank due to the white voice. I couldn't decide if I absolutely adored it or if I found it grating. Maybe I just wasn't feeling well when I first thought about it.

15. Lithuania - The Roop - Discoteque - Lots of fun, doesn't have the charm that On Fire had last year. I would dance to this song.

14. Poland - RAFAŁ - The Ride - I actually kinda like this song???? Even with Rafal's vocals??? I know he has political controversies, but I can't help but think this song is nice. A better, less controversial singer would benefit this song, though. I'm not counting the revamp just yet since it was released too recently.

13. Latvia - Samanta Tīna - The Moon Is Rising - This song gives me nostalgic mid to late 2000s hip hop vibes. The guitars in this song are lovely.

12. Romania - ROXEN - Amnesia - Definitely something that can put me in a trance if I'm in the right mood.

11. Czechia - Benny Cristo - omaga - Nice, catchy, I would dance to this.

10. Malta - Destiny - Je Me Casse - Damn, Destiny has a lovely voice! And the song itself is wonderful. I'm not a fan of the amount of Swedish talent being used instead of Maltese talent, but I really do enjoy listening to this.

9. Denmark - Fyr og Flamme - Øve Os På Hinanden - another really fun song! This really grew on me. Nowadays if I want to listen to a Eurovision song, this is one of the first songs I think of.

8. The Netherlands - Jeangu Macrooy - Birth of a New Age - I can vibe with this. You can hear the passion in this song. I wish I could let my body do the talking right now, but y'all can't see that with just a tumblr text post.

7. Russia - Manizha - Russian Woman - I was NOT expecting this to come out of Russia when it won the national final. I wasn't expecting to like this either. The message is great, the instrumental is great, everything about this is brilliant.

6. United Kingdom - James Newman - Embers - A funky song. I LOVE James's voice. Massive upgrade from last year in my opinion. I'm a sucker for brass in an upbeat song. Unfortunately, I have had the staging kinda spoiled and I am VERY skeptical about this coming out of bottom five. I'm done with the BBC.

5. Australia - Montaigne - Technicolour - There is a Lot happening in this song and I am all in for it. I'm kinda terrible at parsing lyrics, but it's a non-issue when I can follow Montaigne's voice and forget about the lyrics. Ironically enough, it's Montaigne's voice that also worries me this Eurovision season - mostly whether she was able to pull off her live on tape performance off.

4. Iceland - Daði og Gagnamagnið - 10 Years - I didn't think Daði could pull it off against this year, but he did it. I like this just a little more than Think About Things, which was my favorite song last year. I'm still a little gutted that this pandemic robbed him of a probable victory, but I've made peace with it. I still need to learn the dance moves, though.

3. Italy - Måneskin - Zitti E Buoni - FUCK YEAH A KICKASS ROCK SONG IN EUROVISION! This song gave me massive rock en español vibes on my fist listen, and honestly this is something I would bang my head to if I had the same body I did when I was 15.

2. Norway - TIX - Fallen Angel - I was not expecting to like this song much, let alone becoming THIS obsessed with TIX. In fact, he wasn't even on my radar for winning MGP. I listened to Ut Av Mørket for the first time and thought something like 'this is boring af, but at least it's in Norwegian'. And then he changed it to English, which I wasn't a fan of at first. And then one day the lyrics clicked - especially with my own struggles with mental illness. To this day this is one of only two Eurovision songs to actually make me cry. Even now he still isn't my MGP winner (that honor goes to JORN), but he has definitely won my heart.

1. Finland - Blind Channel - Dark Side - To say that this song kicks ass would be an understatement for me. This song has just the right mix of rock, pop, and even metal. Ever since I found out that this song would be in the national final, I knew that it would be my favorite this whole Eurovision season regardless of who won UMK. Yes, my jaw dropped when I saw the lead Blind Channel had in UMK. I literally cancelled my plans to watch the MGP final live because of these guys. I am not disappointed. Even Måneskin couldn't bring these guys down in my ranking. And while the lyrics might be a bit iffy, they did get me through rough times. I hope these guys are able to bring rock music back like they want to. But for now, I will give them my (useless tbh) douze points.

#eurovision #esc #this post took me two days #and even longer to actually rank everything #mostly because half the time i couldn't decide which song i liked more #so something gerbear's sorter couldn't help with #i'm tired rn #of course my top 3 is predictable

8 notes · View notes

spaceorphan18 · 4 years

Text

Blaine Solos Ranked

With the success of the Kurt Solos Ranked, I thought I’d see if I could do Blaine’s as well. Which has become an interesting and complicated endeavor.

First of all - there’s the whole issue of what constitutes as a solo -- especially when he often times has an entire back up group singing along with him. Things like the Warbler numbers I counted -- because he sings the lead in the song by himself. Not counted are group numbers where he is featured - such as Hey Jude and This Is the New Year. Mostly, I stuck to what Glee Wiki counts as a solo, so if you have issues, take it up with them.

Secondly, when ranking Kurt solos, I took a lot into account of how heavily the song ties Kurt’s story. While nearly all of Kurt’s solos tie in with his story, the Blaine solos don’t always do so. So, mostly this is just what I think of them.

Thirdly, the Blaine fans that I have met are, well, fairly passionate about his music, so I want to say this. There aren’t really any bad Blaine solos. Unlike Will and Tina, who were subjected to poor song choices, Blaine’s performances, across the board, are pretty stellar. So, I’d like to remind everyone that this list is pretty arbitrary and based on my subjective biases.

So going in - take the list as it is, just a fun look at how one person ranks the solos. :)

Btw - the trivia on Glee wiki says that Blaine sings 31 solos, but I only found 29 -- do they mean the two songs added to the Warblers CD? Or am I missing a couple??

29. I’m Not Going to Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You (Prom Queen)

Look at the list of Blaine solos, and arranging it to a list of things I like more than other things, this just kept sinking down and down. The biggest reason is that I just don’t like the song. Yup, that’s it. Nothing exciting about that really. But I suppose adding to that is the fact that this performance feels way more Darren than it does Blaine, and that the onscreen performance is mostly Finn and Jesse fighting over Rachel. As I said earlier, there’s nothing /bad/ about any of Blaine’s solo, I just like all the rest more.

28. Piano Man (Movin’ Out)

This is a perfectly fine albeit generic rendition of this number. So, here’s my thing about this one - when they did Piano Man in season one, not only did the song fit a bit more into context with Will and Bryan Ryan being somewhat washed up losers, there was a grittiness in not only the song but the visuals as well, and we get to do something that TV can do, which is transport us into the atmosphere of the song. By the time Blaine gets to do this number, all of that context and TV atmosphere has been kind of washed away. And this feels like a number that everyone would have fun singing at Darren’s piano bar because it’s a classic, and less because it has relevance to any of the story.

Look - a lot of these numbers are fun numbers just for the heck of it, but since they had already done this one, and since this is supposed to take place of the NYADA audition, I’m marking it down. You can do a lot with this song, and this performance, mostly, didn’t.

27. Everybody Wants to Rule the World

This is another one where I just am not a fan of the original song, and I don’t go back to listen to it very often. That said - it is super fun to see Blaine joining all the clubs and being super interactive in school, even if it’s tinged with the sadness that he and Kurt aren’t connecting much these days.

26. Bills, Bills, Bills (The Sue Sylvester Shuffle)

This one has grown on me over the years. It is a bit random - the Warblers’ singing an impromptu (and somewhat obligatory) Destiny’s Child song for the Superbowl episode. It has zero story resonance. But it is hilarious to see how much furniture Darren Blaine stands on during the number. If nothing else, the number is fun, and the Warblers look like they’re enjoying the hell out of doing it.

25. When I Get You Alone (Silly Love Songs)

This one, still, is one of the cringiest things they did on the show. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hilariously ridiculous, and Blaine singing to a dude in The Gap about sex toys is just, well, something memorable. It also is getting points for Kurt’s annoyed looks and Darren’s pink sunglasses. But overall, it still makes me uncomfortable to watch.

24. Fighter (Big Brother)

So, mostly, this just isn’t a song I like all that much. Vocally, Blaine sounds fine on it - and does a decent job with it. That said, I can’t take it as seriously as I’m supposed to. There’s something I find unintentionally hilarious about this little, teenage grandpa angsting over his brother. I know it’s got the infamous shower sequence in here - and I get it, I do. But the fact that I can’t keep from giggling through it is why it’s a bit lower than the rest.

23. Against All Odds (Guilty Pleasures)

First of all, I’ve always confused by the debate about this song. It’s clearly for Sam, because Blaine’s an intense guy with intense emotions, and any song he sings for a person he has feelings for is going to be intense. Go back and watch When I Get You Alone -- that was intense for a dude he got coffee with twice. I love Blaine (and Darren) with a piano and his voice, and this is one of the ones that was performed live, so that’s cool. Not my favorite Phil Collins’s number - so that’s mostly the reason for the position here. Also not the most visually engaging. But the song is performed well.

22. Hopelessly Devoted to You (The Role You Were Born to Play)

I’ve never realized just how many angsty Blaine songs he has in his canon. It’s kind of like the equivalent of Kurt crying through his solos. He does it well, and I don’t really have any faults for this one. It’s visually entertaining as well as sounding pretty good. But not a favorite song of mine, and therefore just gets notched a bit lower.

21. Last Friday Night (Pot o Gold)

I actually really like this song, even if I’ve probably heard it enough to be fine with not hearing it again for a long time. The performance is cute - there’s a nice high energy about it (with the exception of Santana’s dower expression during the whole thing because random season 3 conflict). However, this is kind of the height of whole Jukebox Blaine thing, where he’s trotted out to sing the hot new single of the summer, and then we just stash him away in the background to sit next to Kurt platonically until he’s needed again. I like the song and the performance, but am frustrated by the gratuitous context.

20. It's Not Unusual (The Purple Piano Project)

This one is flirty and high energy and Blaine looks super cute dancing on the stairs. I don’t really have any faults for this number. But I’m not particularly emotionally attached to it, either, so so in the middle it goes.

19. Hey, Soul Sister (Special Education)

I unabashedly love this song - even though I feel like I’m not supposed to since it was way, way over played when it was popular. But I do. The performance, however, isn’t the Warblers’ best -- across the board I feel like competition numbers rarely are -- and I’d argue it’s one of Blaine’s weaker vocal performances (sorry Darren), but it’s still fun, and the arrangements for the Warbler songs have always been pretty stellar.

18. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' (Michael)

While the song itself is a bit strange, and while I’ve never been a huge MJ fan (sorry my dudes), I think this number is a lot of fun. It’s visually pretty entertaining, and I love the second half where they bring in all of the different styles MJ had donned over the years. It’s vocally pretty stagnant, so Blaine doesn’t have to do much here, but it’s about the spectacle anyway - and I enjoy what they did with it.

17. Something’s Coming

It’s always nice to hear Blaine do a Broadway number to give us a break from the mostly pop music he sings. While not Blaine’s strongest number vocally (he struggles just a little more on the Broadway ones), I love that he brings the stage alive when it’s just him singing. He’s incredibly visually engaging, and what he may lack (a little) with the vocals he makes up in energy and enthusiasm, which is always a joy to watch. Plus, there’s something particularly more attractive about early season 3 Blaine (possibly the fluffier, less gelled hair) that adds a nice touch.

16. Not While I'm Around (Bash)

Interestingly, the studio version of this song has everyone on it, and I’m so glad they let Blaine sing it on his own - because I feel it’s much more impactful that way. Not only is this the only real insight we get into Blaine’s head during this episode, but it’s raw and emotional (in a good way), and that adds to story unfolding on our screen. This might be, perhaps, the shortest number on the list, but its impact is stronger than a lot of the other numbers on the list, which is why I enjoy it a lot more.

15. Beauty School Dropout (Glease)

My favorite Broadway number that Blaine does on the show. I kind of love that there’s a lot going on during this song. Not only is Blaine doing an amazing Teen Angel, there’s the moment in the middle Blaine sees Kurt, and the layered look on Blaine’s face as he tries to hold it together is pretty remarkable. It’s one of my favorite acting moments from Darren, and one of my favorite times the story of the characters is layered over a seemingly disconnected performance. Plus, Blaine sounds fantastic on this catchy little number.

14. Silly Love Songs (Silly Love Songs)

This is one of those charming Warbler numbers that doubles as an ending feature that actually gives relevance to the story of the episode. It’s cute and sweet and flirty and fun and everyone gets something interesting to do during it. I don’t have a lot of commentary to add about it - but it’s a classic for a reason, and because of that, it deserves a higher spot on the list.

13. You're My Best Friend (Puppet Master)

I’m not sure I fully understand the casts’ aversion to the puppets (though I’ll acknowledge that it’s probably weird to perform with a puppet of yourself). That said, this number is kinda cool visually, and a nice break from what can be tedious choir room songs at this point in the series. I also enjoy the song and think Blaine sounds nice on it. Plus - Blaine totally has a backup career in children’s programming if he ever desired. It is weird that Blaine’s singing to puppets in the first place, but I do adore this one.

12. Don't Stop Me Now (Diva)

I enjoy that Blaine’s version of being a diva is just adding a leather jacket and pants to a number he performs exactly the same otherwise. Again, not much to comment on here, but I love the song, and Blaine sounds great on it, and while it isn’t hugely impactful to his story, I like that it shows Blaine being the ambitious little go-getter that he is.

11. Misery (Original Song)

This is another one of those songs that I unironically love. It is the most upbeat song about being miserable that I’ve ever heard, and while a lot of this song has to do with Kurt and his own mental state, has there ever been a more perfect song for Blaine? (well, yes but I’d digress if I went on about that.) I love so much about this song, from the choreography to Blaine’s obliviousness with Kurt as the number progresses. It’s fun and energetic and the most entertaining a subject as misery can get.

10. Cough Syrup (On My Way)

This might be the most controversial pick on the list, since I know for a lot of Blaine fans, this is their favorite number. I think it validates what a lot of people had been thinking - that there’s a lot going on underneath the surface of an outwardly peppy and energetic Blaine Anderson. And, I do like this song, and find it haunting -- it’s much different than the songs Blaine usually sings. It’s more emotional and tortured, and it’s fascinating to watch him sing his way through it. That said, the actual performance of this I rarely ever watch. It’s laid over Karofsky’s suicide attempt, and I find that sequence incredibly difficult to watch. So, while I do think a lot of the praise this song gets is completely valid, I can’t claim that it’s my favorite. I’m giving it an obligatory spot at #10 because I do think it deserves to be acknowledged as one of Blaine’s best solos.

9. It's Not Alright but It's Okay (Dance With Somebody)

Funny enough, as just a song, this isn’t one of my favorites. But I love, love what this song does. Clearly, by now I’m sure you’ve figured out, I love performances that have a lot of layers to them - and this one definitely does. There’s a great duality going on here between the awkward sadness that Blaine actually sings in the choir room versus the controlled anger that Blaine displays during his own fantasy. (It’s also one half of a conversation with Kurt that gets resolved when Kurt sings I Have Nothing later on.) I love the complexity of emotion that goes on during this one, and it remains one of my favorite performances on the show.

8. My Dark Side (Dynamic Duets)

Yes, this song is amazing! Again, another one of those performances that has a ton packed in it -- that has the additional quality of sounding and looking fantastic. I love that this song is entirely about Blaine, and where he is in his life. We get more tortured Blaine, but this time it’s in a more upbeat, pop-y song that suits Blaine incredibly well. But mostly, I love his interaction with the Warblers during it, the choreography is brilliant as they slowly start to bring him back in as their leader - and that moment where he parts them and he walks down the center reclaiming his position. There’s a lot to unpack here, as it easily meshes with the themes of the episode - of dark vs light and of heroes not always being heroic (but worth it anyway). I love when there’s deeper symbolism in a performance, and this has a ton of that.

7. All of Me (The Untitled Rachel Berry Project)

Look, it’s probably no secret that I really love Blaine (and Darren) just sitting at a piano singing. And I really love this song in general, too. Blaine’s last solo on the show (unfortunately!) is as tortured as many of the others on this list, but the thing that stands out for me about this one is its simplicity. It’s just Blaine by himself, working out how he feels about his situation through song. It’s not really meant to be heard by Kurt (or anyone else) but it’s also a shame that so rarely Blaine gets to let his real emotions be on display, which he does here. The performance is also beautifully shot, and intentionally evocative of another infamous Blaine solo that’s a little higher on the list.

6. Raise Your Glass (Original Song)

This is quintessential Warblers, and quintessential performance Blaine. This song is amazing on its own, truly. But the Warblers bring so much warmth and joy to it -- it’s such an engaging and energetic song, I often listen to it as a pick me up. No - this isn’t essential to Blaine’s character story, but I think it represents all the fun and ridiculousness Blaine and the Warblers arc brought to the show.

5. Somewhere Only We Know (Born This Way)

There’s something hauntingly beautiful about this one. Blaine (and the Warblers) sound great on it, and it’s the beginning of Blaine having a tortured and emotional underbelly to his personality. But more so, this song is about endings, and this is a turning point in Kurt’s and Klaine’s story as we say goodbye to Dalton and move on with the rest of Kurt’s journey. And it’s a dialogue between Kurt and Blaine, despite the sea of people around them, things are changing between them for better and for worse and for... just growing up, and this song encapsulates that beautifully.

4. All You Need is Love (Love, Love, Love)

Not gonna lie, this one is 100% about the context within the show. When I first heard the song, when it was released before the episode, it was kinda like - cool, Darren’s singing a Beatles cover. But the actual performance, the fact that this is essentially a love letter to the Klaine story, makes it one of the most precious and romantic numbers in the entire show. Blaine pulls out all the stops for Kurt here, and I can never just watch the performance, but always continue on to the proposal as well. It’s a beautiful performance, and a beautiful moment for Klaine and an utter highlight for the show itself.

3. It’s Time (The New Rachel)

Perhaps a number I’ve seen more than any other, I just love this number so much. Yes, it’s a good song. Yes, Blaine sounds great on it. And yes, the choreography is a ton of fun. But it’s also Blaine, very much himself, torn between being a child and growing up. There’s an unspoken dialogue between Kurt and Blaine during this song, about moving on from being stuck, and while this number is very childlike in it’s choreography, the subject matter is a little more mature -- being about moving on from the places your feel safe and journeying out in the world to be the person you’re supposed to be. There’s also a duality here -- where Blaine is stuck in the childlike land of high school as Kurt moves on to college and New York. This is another turning point in their story (as is all the songs done on these steps for these two), and I absolutely love that. But, it shouldn’t be discounted that it is a really good song that Blaine sounds really good on -- which is why it makes it one of Blaine’s best solos.

2. Teenage Dream Acoustic (The Break Up)

I’m sure that no one is surprised this at the top of the list. But what I can’t stress enough is that this is, hands down, one of the best performances done on the show period. Katy Perry’s original version of Teenage Dream is a trashy, forgettable pop song. What Darren Criss did with it is nothing short of magical. But then to bring this arrangement and add in his most phenomenal acting performance, even if it did break all of our hearts. The thing I love especially about the show version (vs the studio version) is that we get to see Blaine slowly break down and become unraveled while singing it. The performer that Blaine is starts to break down and this performance becomes an utter mess -- which makes it all the more powerful, moving, and heartbreaking. I love everything that this number chooses to be -- from exposing Blaine’s character, to the breaking of the fairy tale romance that is Klaine, to letting it be an end of one thing while the beginning of another.

Meanwhile, on another note, I’ve heard Darren sing this enough in his own performances that I have somewhat disassociated this version with the Klaine break up - but that doesn’t make this arrangement less powerful. Darren took a somewhat throwaway song and made something uniquely beautiful with it -- and that’s incredibly special, too.

1. Teenage Dream (Never Been Kissed)

I’m sure you’re gasping with surprise. But, this is no. 1 for a reason. While I think the acoustic version is better sounding (there’s just a tad too much auto tune here for reasons I’m unsure about), this number is the epitome of all Blaine numbers. It’s his introduction to the show, and so much of Blaine’s character was cultivated out of this performance. On top of that -- this performance made Kurt alive again, and it’s the beginning of a wild and beautiful story that would be the Klaine love story. It also became a major hit for the show - thrusting the music of Glee to a height that it never really could match again.

The scene is iconic and classic. The song is iconic and classic. Everything that is Blaine and the Klaine love story is wrapped up in this one. And every time I come back to it, I can’t help but smile - which is why this one remains at the top spot for me.

#blaine anderson #that's how s.o. sees it #huh #i've learned a lot about myself doing this actually #and a bit about blaine too tbh

85 notes · View notes

ungarmax · 3 years

Text

tagged by @herbgerblin, thank you!!! <3 answer 30 questions and tag 20 an amount of people; i don’t know 20 people, do you know 20 people??

1. Name/nickname: Zack

2. Gender: I'm a dude!

3. Star sign: Leo :3 rawr

4. Height: 5'10"

5. Time: 7:28 PM

6. Birthday: August 14th

7. Favorite bands/groups: At risk of dating myself, I would say Garbage and the Wallflowers.

8. Favorite solo artist: Herb said Regina Spektor, and that's a really good point. I will have to defer to that answer as well.

9. Song stuck in my head: I'm listening to a remix of Tal Tal Heights from Link's Awakening, and it's not really in my head, but listening to music makes it hard for music to be in my head.

10. Last movie: Um...roommate's niece and nephew were here the other day, and they watched some movie about bunny super heroes or something. I don't know. I don’t really watch many movies. At some point, I watched that movie about immortal people that everyone was talking about for like a week last summer, but I don’t remember when exactly.

11. Last show: I've been watching AGDQ all week. Does that count? I don't really watch TV either, whoops!!

12. When did I create this blog: Sometime in 2011.

13. What do I post: I mostly reblog cool stuff other people post, due to the fact that other people are funny and creative, and I am not either of those things. You can get raw, uncensored Zack over on my twitter, though.

14. Last thing I googled: I was looking up the lyrics to "Loose Lips" by Kimya Dawson because it was my anthem that got me through 2020.

15. Other blogs: I have 10,000 side blogs and rp accounts, but I really only use this and my twitter. You may know me from @withoutanumber or @meteor-shots though. I think those are my most popular other accounts, even if I don't really use them anymore.

16. Do I get asks: Not often.

17. Why did I choose this url: Because I'm Barret Wallace's biggest fan. <3

18. Following: 139

19. Followers: 1,674

20. Average hours of sleep: 4-6, generally.

21. Lucky number: 481

22. Instruments: I don't own any. I took 7 years of piano lessons when I was a kid, though, and I was in a choir for about 15 years. I wanted to play clarinet in school, but my school didn’t have a band class.

23. What am I wearing: Jeans, a Homestuck t-shirt, and a FNaF hoodie. Mega cringe, bro!

24. Dream job: Hmm, something where I make more than $11/hour, probably.

25. Dream trip: The negative aspects of traveling and being in an unfamiliar place outweighs any positive aspects of going somewhere for me. So I guess, um, my bed?

26. Favorite food: Ice cream!

28. Favorite song: 'The Price of Freedom' from Crisis Core. I'm aware of the irony here. (If you are unfamiliar, this piece plays while a guy named Zack dies.)

29. Last book read: One of the Murderbot Diaries, but I can't remember which.

30. Three fictional universes you’d like to live in: Animal Crossing, Stardew Valley, and Pokemon, maybe? I would like to have a big Snorlax to sleep on top of.

tagging (from my activity page because i’m lazy): @perniciouslizard @manyblinkinglights @bob-fish @starlight-seeker @enemytosleep @androidsfighting @nickleerie @thats-so-roentgen @madseason aaaand anyone else who wants to

#ask meme #feel free to skip i tagged you and you're not feeling it #or to do it if i didn't #you can tag me as having tagged you if you want!#shut up zack

7 notes · View notes

ragazza-paradiso · 3 years

Text

my eurovision 2021 ranking (before rehearsals)

hey!! 🤍 i’ll try to keep this short & sweet (and bear in mind some of these are subject to change & depend on my mood) but this is my rough ranking of this year’s entries based solely on the studio cuts <3

dislike:

39. 🇩🇪 jendrik - i don’t feel hate: i knew this would be my last place since i first heard it. he seems like a nice guy but this type of music is just. not for me? in fact i don’t think i’ve ever even managed to make it all the way through since my first listen :/

38. 🇱🇻 samanta tina - the moon is rising: i love love LOVE samanta & think she is an absolute gem but this song & me simply do not go together. that being said i appreciate both her voice & the message

37. 🇵🇱 rafał - the ride: while this is slightly catchy & seems to be an ear worm for me, i cannot take this song seriously. rafał looks ridiculous in those sunglasses in the music video. the lyrics are awful too

neither like nor dislike:

36. 🇦🇱 anxhela peristeri - karma: this is very strange because usually i am the no. 1 fan of ethnic influenced ballads at eurovision, but i just do not get this one. i can definitely see the appeal but it’s not for me

35. 🇲🇰 vasil - here i stand: i think his voice is great however the song doesn’t do much for me. i find it quite forgettable & think he was definitely capable of giving us something better which is a shame

34. 🇫🇮 blind channel - dark side: i enjoyed this quite a bit when it first came out but it’s quickly slid down my ratings. the lyrics are too edgy for me & it’s a throwback to a genre of music that i don’t really enjoy anyway. but i can appreciate that it sticks out & does something different

33. 🇨🇿 benny cristo - omaga: i was a massive fan of kemama last year & while i liked this upon first listen, i have to say its far too generic to really stick out after a while. plus some of the lyrics are a bit creepy lol. having said that i think seeing him perform it live could definitely change my opinion

32. 🇸🇪 tusse - voices: another year, another generic well produced pop song from sweden. should we be surprised anymore? it’s okay, i don’t hate it, but i’m struggling to find anything i like about it. plus the lyrics are the most “eurovision cliche lyrics” i’ve ever heard

31. 🇬🇧 james newman - embers: okay while this is ranked relatively low, i have to say this is better than anything we’ve sent since 2017. it’s a nice song, i enjoy it when it’s on, but i don’t have an urge to play it, if that makes sense?

30. 🇲🇹 destiny - je me casse: i know this is probably blasphemy but i just do not understand the hype around this song. destiny has a great voice but i don’t see how this song sticks out in anyway that it’s the favourite to win? it’s another one that i won’t skip but i won’t seek out to listen to

29. 🇦🇹 vincent bueno - amen: i do enjoy this, but i wish it just had a bit more oomph. the lyrics for the verses are good but the chorus is just lacking something. i do think this could be a dark horse to qualify though

28. 🇸🇮 ana soklič - amen: i just realised the two amens are right next to each other on my ranking lol. anyway, this is only so high because of her amazing voice. the song doesn’t really do anything for me, but you have to appreciate that level of talent

27. 🇺🇦 go_a - shum: this is one i know i’ll appreciate more live, but i just can’t get into the studio version. plus i really liked solovey last year so this one seems worse in comparison

26. 🇲🇩 natalia gordienko - sugar: this is good but i think all “dream team” songs are a little bit dated nowadays. however saying that i love the music video & moldova always improve live

25. 🇵🇹 the black mamba - love is on my side: this has been a big grower. it’s not a favourite, but i think it definitely has its niche, and i can appreciate that

24. 🇳🇱 jeangu macrooy - birth of a new age: grow was in my top 5 last year, so it was always gonna be hard for jeangu to deliver something as good. this has grown on me, but i’m still not 100% on board

like:

23. 🇳🇴 tix - fallen angel: i didn’t like this at first because i was so heartbroken that keiino didn’t win the national selection, but i’ve gotten over it now lol. it’s cheesy but in a good way, i think this act doesn’t take itself too seriously either which makes it more enjoyable

22. 🇸🇲 senhit ft flo rida - adrenalina: it’s fun, catchy, even has a surprise verse from flo rida! probably san marino’s 3rd best entry ever (justice for complice & crisalide 💔)

21. 🇨🇾 elena tsagrinou - el diablo: it’s just a very good pop song. i’m not in love with it but it’s of a very good quality (well. apart from the lyrics). i’m sure the staging will improve it even more

20. 🇬🇷 stefania - super girl: greece is one of my biggest growers from last year, i think this is a MUCH better song than supergirl was. i’m really rooting for stefania

19. 🇪🇪 uku suviste - the lucky one: this has been such a big grower, it’s insane. i can recognise it’s not the best song but i just really like it for some reason.

18. 🇪🇸 blas cantó - voy a quedarme: i’m a sucker for native language ballads, and this is a pretty standard one, but it’s good to me. blas seems like a real sweetheart too, which helps :)

17. 🇨🇭 gjon’s tears - tout l’univers: this is another one of those songs that i really should love, and while i like it, i can’t really connect with it. gjon’s entry last year was my second favourite, and unfortunately this doesn’t scratch the same itch that did, it’s still a very good song & i completely understand why it’s one of the favourites to win

16. 🇧🇪 hooverphonic - the wrong place: i really don’t like hooverphonic as a band (actually it’s mostly alex callier that i dislike) but this is just a good song. i am still upset that luka didn’t get to go to eurovision though :/

15. 🇮🇪 lesley roy - maps: another massive grower! i much prefer this to her song last year. i really hope ireland can get their shit together & give this song the staging it deserves

14. 🇦🇿 efendi - mata hari: this is basically a carbon copy of cleopatra, and i guess i liked that so i like this. however i will say it has dropped in my ranking a bit. i’m ranking this solely on the song, efendi herself is a different matter & i’m not really educated enough on what’s happening in azerbaijan/armenia to comment but from what i’ve seen it’s not the best, let’s say

13. 🇱🇹 the roop - discoteque: i prefer on fire from last year, but this is definitely not a bad effort. i can’t see it as a contender for the win though. another one i will probably enjoy much more live

12. 🇷🇴 roxen - amnesia: i really like the message of this song. i just wish she would work on her english pronunciation, but that’s a minor complaint. but i really like roxen as an artist

love:

11. 🇷🇸 hurricane - loco loco: i love girl groups, and this is no exception. vocally they’re really good, i love that it’s in serbian, & i also just really love sanja vučić lol

10. 🇭🇷 albina - tick tock: i wish this was fully in croatian, but i think it’s a great song regardless. i loved her performance at dora so hopefully they’ll do something similar/even better at esc

9. 🇧🇬 victoria - growing up is getting old: i preferred tears getting sober from last year but this is still really good. the lyrics are some of my favourite of this year, they really resonate with me. victoria is a really interesting artist & i’m really glad she got introduced to me through esc

8. 🇮🇱 eden alene - set me free: the revamp has made this move like 20 places up in my ranking lol. she is so talented & i just hope they have a good staging concept!

7. 🇮🇸 daði og gagnamagnið - 10 years: think about things was good but i think this is even better! i love the retro influences & the lyrics are so sweet

6. 🇬🇪 tornike kipiani - you: i might be one of the only people who adores this song. the lyrics paint such a clear picture of a simple, strong love. and i think it’s quiet but powerful at the right moments. i know i will be heartbroken when this doesn’t qualify :(

5. 🇫🇷 barbara pravi - voilà: i played this too much & ruined it for myself, but i love it again now. very authentically french but without overdoing it (cough 2017 staging cough), just a beautiful song

4. 🇮🇹 måneskin - zitti e buoni: i’m not a massive rock fan, but a song like this i just vibe with. it’s just so good. italy is always either my no. 1 or in my top 5 since they returned (apart from 2012 & 2014) and they’ve done it again. this is definitely a contender to win

3. 🇦🇺 montaigne - technicolour: this song is eclectic but i love it. i didn’t like don’t break me, but this is so much better, and so much more authentic to montaigne as an artist. i know it’s divisive, but i’m on the side that loves it

2. 🇩🇰 fyr og flamme - øve os på hinanden: this is just so fun. i love the 80s vibe, the performance at the national selection was simple but still very engaging. this is one i will play for many years after the contest

1. 🇷🇺 manizha - russian woman: where do i even start. native language, ethnic influenced sound, important message, charismatic performer. this song is amazing. and i’m so glad i’ve found manizha to listen to!

so that’s it!! if anyone wants to chat about their thoughts please message me!! 🤍

#esc 2021

3 notes · View notes

dulce-pjm · 3 years

Text

tag game !

tagged by @jtrbluv !! ty love, i’ve seen this one going around and it looked fun !!

1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?

i only started writing fanfiction this year, so bts is the one and only lol

2. what fandoms are you currently writing for?

bts !! i think i’ll be sticking to just bts x reader fics during my time here :) (but i am def a big fan of other groups and post about them sometimes !! my other interests can be found through the navi and i’m down to chat/fangirl anytime)

3. how long have you been writing?

like five or six years? i used to write original stories on wattpad in middle school but i have unfortunately forgotten both the username and password to that account and just realized those monstrosities might still be floating around on there oof

4. on which platforms do you post your stories?

just tumblr !! i’m the process of making an ao3 in case something happens to my account, but i probably won’t crosspost unless i have to, just kinda depends

5. what is your favourite genre to write?

def fluff and comedy !!! i enjoy angst but i’m a bit of a method actor in that i deeply feel whatever i’m writing so i normally don’t make it far writing angst lol but i will try one day !!

6. are you a pantser or a planner?

planner for sure !! i have def written fics that weren’t planned, but i tend to feel way better about the ones that i plan out. they flow better when i plan them and when you know where your story is going it’s easier to foreshadow and actually build tension towards the climax and ending !!!

7. one shot or multi-chapter?

it really just depends on the story !!! it’s all in how i envision it tbh. if i see the scenes more as episodic and almost separately working towards the ending, then it’ll probably end up fitting into chapters. but if the scenes and arcs all really rely on each other and flow as a group, then yeah it’s a big one shot !! as a reader, i tend to binge anyway so it doesn’t matter to me lol

8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?

lol again it depends on what suits the story !! and i think it’s fun sometimes for there to be a variety of chapter lengths

9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?

stepsisters and squires at 11.0k, and yes it’s complete !! although my current biggest project is probably going to end up around 15k and if i had to guess, part two will probably be a bit shorter than that

10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?

hmmmm for sure @alpacaparkaseok’s request case closed!! i was being very silly writing it and had a grand time, but takes two to tango is a close second behind !!!

11. favourite request you've have written and why (if any?)

oh well there we go it’s case closed !!! i love some good silly ridiculous romance and i feel like i did an okay job achieving that lol

12. are there reoccurring themes in your stories?

awkward people finding love ???? LOL and lots of overthinking only to realize things aren’t quite as big as they first appeared wait omg yeah that’s it that’s the one lmao. scrolled through my masterlist and it seems that the central conflict is always the main character versus their own mind which is basically my day-to-day life so makes sense i guess

also i’ve accidentally written people talking over each other and then said something like “timing’s funny” right after in two separate fics and needless to say i’m disappointed in myself LOL how did i do that ??? tsk tsk

13. current number of wips?

ahhh i’m not really sure how to count them but i’m like actively writing around four or five, i tend to bounce around and then suddenly binge write an entire one

14. three things you have noticed about your own writing?

hmmm well 1) we’ve learned my characters are too caught up in their own heads (like me muhahaha), 2) i tend to write pretty colloquially even though i have the vocabulary to be more descriptive lol, and 3) even when i don’t mean to i tend to end up writing based off of things i’ve experienced before

15. a quote you like from a published story

lol this isn’t particularly well written or anything i just think it’s funny and i really enjoyed writing this scene. it’s from stepsisters and squires !

“Maybe you can trick the witch!” You suggest, words muffled by the dessert you’re chewing on as you blatantly talk with your mouth open. All manners have been abandoned as Taehyung is eating two eclairs at once, equally focused on the matter at hand. “Well, no, maybe trying to trick a magical scary lady is a bad idea.”

i’m very attached to tae’s character despite him making a very minor appearance and i love his and the oc’s chaotic energy together haha !! i’d like to write him his own spin-off sometime based on their interaction

16. a quote from an unpublished story

hehe imma keep teasing the tae twoshot in the hopes that it makes me ACTUALLY FINISH IT FJKDLSHGLSDKJF anyway ~~~

“Your singing, on the other hand, is just fantastic,” he adds, smirking as he side-eyes you. He suppresses a laugh when he sees your mortified expression. You’re quick to cover it, crossing your arms and feigning pride.

“I know. You guys are lucky I’m not participating in the battle of the bands. I’d crush you.” Taehyung full on giggles then and you don’t hate it all that much. It’s a little squeaky though. But then his eyes light up and he’s grabbing you by the shoulders, a desperate look in his eye.

“Wait, would you wanna join? Because we could really use a mezzo voice, it’d completely change the sound—”

hopefully an official teaser will be dropped soon we’ll see !!!

17. space for you to say something to your readers

thank you guys for being so patient and supportive :( i know i’ve been very sporadic about posting and really haven’t posted at all in like a month and a half. it was very much my intention to write a bunch and then release things on a schedule (and it still is!!) but things have been difficult recently and prevented that from happening. to get to the point, you guys are so great and every piece of feedback and every like and every follow absolutely makes my heart soar. you guys remind me that i’m still capable of writing even when i really don’t feel like it and i appreciate you !! much love <333

tagging @softbobamilktae and @hyungieyoongi my go-to’s lol (sorry if you’ve already done it !!!)

#tag game #jtrbluv

1 note · View note

let-it-raines · 4 years

Text

Catch Me If You Can (36/40)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

a/n: Whaaaat? Two chapters in two days? What kind of alternate universe are we living in?? 😉 This is totally to make up for the last few chapters taking forever even though they’re literally just sitting on my computer!

Thanks to @imagnifika for her awesome art, @resident-of-storybrooke for reading these words and so many other words of mine (it’s a lot), and to @wellhellotragic who prompted me with the idea that inspired this whole thing all the way back in June!

AO3: Beginning | Current

Tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35| 36 |

-/-

Killian fucking hates Boston.

It’s a great city full of good food, and in another lifetime, he’d mostly likely enjoy living here. Right now, the air is crisp with the scent of fall, and trees are in the middle of losing their leaves, the ones remaining a myriad of oranges and reds that remind Killian of sitting in a park in Cincinnati with his mother raking up leaves and then jumping into the piles before cleaning them up for the city. He had to have been four or five then, but that’s one of the first memories that he has. Looking out the window of his hotel room to a park that looks almost identical reminds him of that.

He should be happy, more than happy really, but when you’re trying to get to the World Series next week and are currently tied 2-2 in the AL Championship Series against the Red Sox on the way to getting there, happiness isn’t exactly the most common feeling.

And they’re playing in Boston tonight, and despite the fact that they won last night, beating both the team and the deafening roar of the crowd, Killian is not entirely convinced that they’re going to win again tonight. They could still come back from it by winning the next two games at home, but he’d really rather win here and then win the sixth game at home when he’s pitching and not have to deal with the nastiness of going to a seventh and deciding game.

Who in the hell wants to play sports for a living? It’s too damn stressful.

Losing won’t kill him, not at all. The fact that he’s having the season he’s having, especially with all of the ups and downs and lay-offs, is incredible and a full-credit to his team. But he got the taste of being the last team standing last year, and he wants it back.

Some players never get their hands on the trophy, and Killian is greedy enough to want it twice both for himself, his teammates, and his family.

And Emma. He wants it for Emma.

So, Killian really hates Boston and the fact that they keep putting them in close situations like this. Close games are often the best ones, the ones that have everyone on the edge of their seat, but Killian would kill for an easy night.

“The city isn’t going to implode just because you’re staring out at it with evil in your eyes.”

“One can hope though.”

“That’s entirely sadistic.”

He huffs and turns from the window to look at where Emma is sitting in bed (they’ve stopped bothering to get different hotel rooms now) with her knees pulled up so that she can rest her laptop there. He woke up this morning to her typing away. Apparently, she didn’t finish her work last night, so she had to wake up early this morning to send in a report before the deadline. Walsh’s firing has ended up having Emma needing to write more on top of her regular work, and even though she says she doesn’t mind – “I like writing,” she keeps saying – he knows that it’s kind of a kick in the teeth for her to have to do some of Walsh’s work.

The man is never fully going to go away, obviously. He and Brennan are like a bug that won’t die no matter how much you squash it.

“Are you almost finished with your report, love?”

“Yep,” she says. “I’m finished with it and have moved onto doing my prep work for today’s game as well as a little bit of online shopping because there are these boots that I really want but can’t decide if I’m going to buy.”

“That’s the hardest decision you’ve ever made.”

“Says the man who spends hours trying to decide which identical blue button-down shirt he wants to buy to ‘update’ his wardrobe.”

Killian scoffs and walks forward to flop down on the bed next to her, shaking the mattress with his movement, until he’s flipping over on his back and spreading out so that he takes up most of the space. Emma always hates when he does that.

“My clothes may not be as varied as yours, my darling, but it does take effort to look as good as I do on a regular basis.”

He turns his head to the side to look at her, a smile on his face, and she simply rakes her eyes up and down his body, very obviously perusing him. “You are currently wearing a pair of sweatpants that have a hole in the ass and a hoodie that I’m pretty sure has a permanent stain from some kind of baking accident. Your fashion sense is amazing.”

“You are literally in a pair of pajama pants with Snoopy’s face on them.”

“You wear the same two uniforms all the time.”

“Sometimes we wear the black ones.”

Emma hums. “Those are my favorite. I’ll stop making fun of you for things if you can convince the owners to let you guys wear the all black uniforms more often.”

“You were particularly fond of those on Players’ Weekend.”

“I’m a fan of a man in all black.”

Killian shifts on the mattress, propping himself up on the pillows until he’s mostly resting against the headboard. He can see Emma’s computer screen now, half of it covered with statistics and the other covered with Nordstrom’s website and a pair of boots. If there’s one thing Emma will splurge on, it’s boots.

“Buy the boots, Swan. Live a little bit.”

Emma arches a brow. “Am I made of money?”

“No,” he sighs, leaning over to kiss her shoulder. “That would be very convenient if you were. I’d never work again.”

“If you’re living off of my salary, you’re screwed because I’m definitely going to buy these super expensive boots. I think they would look really cute with the black suede skirt.”

“Ah, yes, I know the one,” he says sarcastically.

“Shut up,” Emma laughs, half-heartedly reaching over to slap his shoulder. “You do! I wore it when we went to dinner last week, and your eyes practically fell out of your head.”

Killian tries to think of what Emma wore last week, his mind blanking on everything at the moment, but then he’s brought back to a memory of the two of them going to eat at Palma on Cornelia Street last week. She’d looked gorgeous that night, her legs going on for miles aided by the heels, and they’d been late for their reservation because the street one block over was Jones Street and Emma insisted that he take a picture underneath the sign for her to send to Liam and Elsa.

He had not been amused, but in his defense, he really wanted to eat.

“Hmm, I think I do recall that one now that I think about it. You should definitely get those boots to wear with that.”

“I didn’t need your permission, but thank you for the approval. Do we need to be getting ready to go have breakfast with everyone?”

“I’m pretty sure breakfast is over down in the lobby.”

“No,” Emma sighs, clicking a few buttons on her laptop until he sees that she did indeed buy the boots. “We’re meeting everyone for breakfast at the café at the end of the block at ten.”

Killian groans and throws his arm over his eyes like the dramatic ass that he is. “That means I have to get dressed.”

“Well, I would prefer it that way. Your pants show off what you’ve got going on in both the front and the back, and I think you might get arrested for public indecency. That’d put a damper in the whole trying to get to the World Series thing.”

“Would you bail me out?”

Emma shrugs her shoulders and closes her laptop. “Eh, maybe. I might not have the money with the boots I just bought.”

-/-

They win that night.

It’s close, far closer than Killian would like watching from the sidelines, and he chews more gum than he thinks he’s ever chewed during a game. Rum would be preferable, but that’s not exactly the best solution when he’s got two nights until he’s got to pitch in the game that could bring them to the World Series.

Al really has far too much confidence in Killian for putting him in position in the line-up.

-/-

Killian fucking loves New York.

Sure, it’s hot and crowded and sometimes smells absolutely horrendous, but he loves it. He’s lived here for seven years, had his family live here for more than that, and he can’t imagine having to ever live anywhere else.

This is his home.

For awhile, he didn’t have one, not really. Everything changed when his mom died, the house feeling far emptier than any lived-in house should feel, and it only continued to empty as the years went on and Brennan became more and more of a distant figure. And as much as Killian loved Vanderbilt, that was simply a temporary home.

Manhattan? This is home.

One day he may like to move a little outside of the city to a place with a big yard and less traffic, but right now, everything he loves is here.

Everyone.

“Uncle Killian,” Lucy whispers, tugging on the hem of his shirt, “is it time to eat dinner yet?”

“Not quite yet, Luce. We can go ask Anna about it, though, yeah?”

He bends down and picks Lucy up, resting her on his hip while she wraps her arms around his neck so that she doesn’t fall. He’s picked her up thousands of times, had her little head nestled onto his shoulder twice that many times, but there’s something peaceful about it now as they stand in one of the sitting rooms at Liam’s house looking out onto the street in front of them as cars occasionally pass by and the leaves keep falling from the few trees that line the street.

They got in from Boston this morning, immediately went to practice, and then most everyone came to Liam and Elsa’s house for dinner as some kind of pre-game Friday night dinner to get everyone’s minds off of things.

There are more people in this townhome than it has seen in years, and he doesn’t think anyone is complaining.

Killian is a little bit, if only because his mind is very much focused on tomorrow and not screwing up to let everyone he loves down, and that’s why he’d walked away from the crowd in the kitchen and living room and wandered upstairs to the sitting room that no one ever wanders into.

Except for Lucy apparently.

Kids seem to foil all kinds of plans, and Lucy is not going to be having a fun day tomorrow since she’s most definitely up far past her bedtime.

He is officially an old man.

“What are we eating?”

“I think it’s lasagna. You know, like big spaghetti all moved together.”

“I know what lasagogona is.”

Wow, that was a butchering of the word lasagna if he’s ever heard it.

“You certainly don’t know how to pronounce it.”

Lucy scoffs, like she has never been so offended in her very short life, but she doesn’t say anything else as he walks down the staircase with the wood boards groaning beneath him. Immediately, he’s bombarded by people. Will, Belle, and Elsa are sitting on the ground with diagrams of seating charts spread out between them. Killian would have at least twenty-five questions about why they’re doing seating chart arrangements for the wedding tonight, but he already knows that it’s because they’re using Elsa to help figure out where to sit some of the more difficult people.

(He assumes he and Emma don’t count as those difficult people, but it really depends on how Will feels about him that day.)

Robin, Kris, Liam, Roland, and Addison are sitting on the couch in the living watching what Killian knows is Trolls because he’s been forced to watch it exactly seventeen times, and Eric and Ariel are standing in the kitchen with Anna cooking.

And, well, apparently Emma too.

“Are we sure we trust the blonde to cook for us?” Killian teases, putting Lucy down on the barstool. “Because I’ve had her cooking before, and I’m not sure we should allow her to feed so many people at once.”

“I’m blonde,” Lucy interjects.

“Yes, yes you are. Can you cook, little love?”

“Mommy doesn’t let me.”

“Funny,” Emma huffs, her eyes pointedly staring him down, “your uncle doesn’t seem to think I can cook either even though I’m only tossing the salad and am perfectly capable of that.”

“SoSo, we’re just going to forget the entire cucumber you dropped on the ground earlier?” Anna asks as she lays rolls out on a pan.

“What about the nearly slicing your finger open?” Ariel adds.

“What happens in the kitchen is supposed to stay in the kitchen.”

“Technically,” Eric sighs, “it hasn’t left the kitchen.”

“You guys are fu – fun,” Emma stops herself and changes the word, her eyes blowing wide when she remembers Lucy is in the room. “Luce, sweetie, do you want me to get you some carrots so you can take them in the other room to watch the movie with Addy and Roland?”

“Yes please.”

Emma turns around and opens the fridge, quickly grabbing a bag of sliced carrots, and hands them over to him for him to hand to Lucy. She takes them, mumbles a “thank you,” and then is sprinting to the adjoining living room to watch the movie.

“So you’re just bribing children now, Swan?”

“Yeah,” she shrugs, “but with carrots so it’s healthy. Babe, can you check my phone and see where everyone else is? Ruby said they would be here by now, but I haven’t heard anything from them. Or David and Mary Margaret. I guess they’re all in traffic or something, but it’s radio silence on their end.”

Killian bites the inside of his cheek to keep from giving anything away, hoping that his tan keeps his cheeks from flaming red. “Where’s your phone?”

“In my purse on the table.”

He nods his head and turns around, thankful that it’s a little bit out of sight of Emma, before he’s shuffling through her small purse to find her phone hidden behind every small object known to men. There is a string of texts from Ruby about Graham taking forever to get home and her almost leaving without him, and Killian sincerely hopes that Ruby didn’t actually leave without Graham. That would go against the plan.

Mary Margaret and David, though, are legitimately stuck in Friday night traffic, so at least he doesn’t have to lie about that.

“They’re on their way, love,” he tells Emma, putting her phone back in her purse and walking back to the island so that he can prop his forearms against the cool countertop. “Anna, you realize a few of us have to play a game tomorrow, right? I don’t think we can eat all of this.”

She waves a wooden spoon in the air, little bits of sauce splattering on the ground. “It’s called portion control. I’m sure you’ve heard of it.”

“Killian has. I haven’t,” Eric laughs. “Though, I’m more of a seafood man myself.”

“There’s only so much seafood that you can eat, though, before you become a fish.”

“You only say that because you don’t like it as much as I do.”

Ariel pats her husband’s chest. “Exactly.”

“Oh my God,” Will groans out, and everyone in the kitchen turns to look at him laying out on the floor. “This is impossible. Why do people get married?”

“I think you mean why do people have weddings,” Belle corrects him.

“I’m kind of questioning both at this point.”

Belle flicks a little name card at Will, and Elsa immediately snatches it back and puts it at the little diagrammed table where it’s supposed to be sitting.

“Why have a seating chart in the first place?” Emma asks. “Why not just let people sit where they want to sit?”

“My mother,” Belle sighs, this discussion obviously a frequent one, “is very traditional and specific about how things should be. She grew up in high society, cotillions and things like that, and even though Will and I mostly want this to be one big party, she has opinions. This is a compromise to make her back off until there’s something else she sets her sights on.”

“Huh,” Emma huffs. “Well, as long as I don’t have to sit next to Killian the entire time, I think it’ll be fine.”

“Shit,” Elsa mumbles under her breath even though the words echo throughout the room. “We don’t have cards for Emma and Killian.”

Laughter rumbles through Killian’s stomach as he walks back over to Emma to place his hand on the small of her back over her sweater before taking the strawberries and putting them on the cutting board to slice up. “Swan, it looks like you won’t have to sit with me because we’re apparently been uninvited from the wedding.”

“Damn. I guess we’ll just have to be wedding crashers.”

“I was thinking we could stay home and not wear uncomfortable clothes but still eat incredible food. We could probably dance a little too.”

“He means the horizontal tango, if you know what I mean.”

“We all know what you mean, Will,” Ariel sighs with a shake of her head but laughter on her lips. “But there are people here related to Killian who probably aren’t too inclined to hear about his sex life.”

“I’m not particularly inclined to hear about Emma’s,” David says, and Killian whips his head around to see he, Mary Margaret, and Leo walking thoughthrough the open garage door. “Or Killian’s. Though I hope they’re one and the same.”

“Okay,” Emma hums, dragging out the word, “we need a change in conversation, something like everyone greeting my brother and nixing this conversation entirely.”

“I mean, I’m kind of curious, but Leo is right here.”

“Mary Margaret,” Emma gasps, and Killian misses what has to be an absolutely priceless look on her face in favor of putting his knife down and walking over to Leo so that they can do their secret handshake that seems to change every time they see each other.

“I like you hat, bud,” Killian compliments. He tugs on the bill, and Leo blushes underneath it. “I think there are some other guys here tonight who would sign it for you if you want.”

Leo’s brows furrow together and the smile on his face completely goes away. Shit. What did Killian do wrong?

“Maybe another hat. I don’t want this one to get messed up.”

“Why not?”

“You signed this one,” he whispers, even if it’s not quiet at all, “and you’re my favorite player.”

“I thought it was your favorite because I gave it to you, kid,” Emma protests as she steps around him and leans down to wrap Leo up in a hug, squeezing him too tightly out of some kind of silent protest.

“I only asked for it because Killian is my favorite player.”

“You’re my favorite nephew.”

Leo rolls his eyes, and while he and Emma may not be related, Killian knows that he got that from her. “I’m your only nephew.”

“Which makes me your favorite.” She kisses his cheek, which makes Leo’s cheeks turn as red as the strawberries. “All the other kids are in that room right over there if you want to go hang out with them until dinner is ready.”

Leo runs off, and David and Mary Margaret take his place by stepping in and greeting everyone with a wave or a hug. It’s so many people, all of them from different social circles, and yet it’s amazing how well they’ve all managed to blend together. Killian knows that he started off with more people than Emma simply by the nature of his job, that most of the people in this house would technically be considered “his,” but he likes to think that they’re Emma’s too.

His phone buzzes in his back pocket, and he pulls it out to see a message from Graham just as Emma sits down and picks up a glass of wine.

Graham Humbert: We just pulled up outside. Can you send Emma out? Say something about needing help with the dessert. I think Ruby would like to tell her before she tells everyone inside.

Killian: Yeah, I’ll send her out. Congrats, mate! I’m happy for the two of you!

“Love?”

“Yeah?”

“I think Ruby and Graham just got here. Do you want to go out and see if they need any help?”

“Why don’t you do it?”

Of course she’s going to be stubborn about.

“I’m finishing this salad,” he lies, even though he really should finish the salad since he took it over from Emma. Will lets out another curse having to do with the seating chart, and there’s a reassurance from Mary Margaret that it will all be okay. “Just go help them. They have the dessert. You love dessert.”

Emma’s brows bunch together and her lips snarl, but she puts the glass of wine that she’s drinking down and stands from the barstool she’s sitting on to go walk out of the garage door and down the stairs. She’s going to be pissed at him for the entire walk out there, but he knows that it won’t be long. And curious as Killian is, he leaves the kitchen to walk over to the bay window so that he can look down at the street where Ruby and Graham are getting out of Graham’s squad car with boxes of pies in their hands. Emma quickly appears, her hands moving as she talks, and then Ruby puts her set of boxes on the hood of the car.

And while Killian can’t hear any screaming or squealing – Emma isn’t really the type – he knows that some kind of inhuman noise just came out of her before she launched herself forward to hug Ruby, squeezing so tightly that he imagined Ruby can’t breathe. And then Graham nearly drops all of the pies when Emma hugs him too. Killian chuckles to himself, a smile stretching across his lips, and then David comes up behind him.

“What’s all that about?”

“You’ll find out in a minute, I’m sure.”

“Secrets don’t make friends.”

“Yeah, yeah they do,” Killian laughs, smiling at David. “And I love how casually you’re referring to me as your friend. It really touches a man’s heart, Dave.”

“Watch it, or I’ll take it back.”

By the time Killian looks back out the window, Graham is gone, leaving Emma and Ruby out to talk. Killian is sure that they’ll be out there for awhile, probably far later than they intend to, and he knows he’ll have to go with them when the food gets here. The door opens then to Graham walking inside with the boxes. Ariel immediately rushes to help him, mostly likely because she likes to talk his ear off about all of the cases he can talk about (she’s very into True Crimes oddly enough), but Killian walks over to save him, grabbing Graham’s hand in greeting before pulling him into a hug and patting his back.

“Congratulations, mate.”

“Thank you,” Graham beams, his smile infectious. “I still can’t believe it.” “What can’t you believe?” Ariel asks as she swipes a finger through the whipped cream on a pie only for Eric to slap her hand away.

Killian looks over at Graham, silently asking if he wants to say something, and he nods, that smile still on his face. “I’ve asked Ruby to marry me today, and she said yes.”

“Congratulations!”

“You did what now?”

“How could you not tell me this?”

“This is so exciting!”

“Whatever you do, don’t do a fucking seating chart for the reception.”

It’s this big, loud chorus of voices and conversations, and it pulls in everyone from the living room too so that it gets so loud that Killian is sure the neighbors can hear. Killian isn’t even entirely sure which legs belong to who for how much movement there is, hugs being exchanged between people who didn’t even get engaged tonight, and it all starts to calm down a bit only for Ruby and Emma walk in the door.

Obviously, things never calm down again.

Ruby and Graham don’t even get to spend much time with this group of people, especially Graham since his schedule never seems to match up with any of theirs, so it’s nice to see the overwhelming joy that’s there for the two of them.

“Congratulations, lass,” he sighs into Ruby’s ear when she finally makes her way to him at the edge of the room, her arms wrapped around her shoulders. “Were you surprised?”

“Yes,” she sighs, her laughter moving through him. “I can’t believe you knew about it.”

Killian rubs his hand up and down her back. “I had to make sure Emma was out of the apartment when it happened because Graham just knew that she would somehow find a way to show up if left to her own devices.”

“I think I could kiss you for doing that.”

“I don’t think that’s very becoming of a newly engaged woman.”

Ruby pulls back and winks at him before leaning forward and kissing his cheek. “You know that I don’t like following the rules.”

“What is this I hear about you knowing about this before it happened?” Emma questions as she saunters up to him, a soft smile on her face and the slightest bit of mascara smudged under her eyes. “I thought we had an agreement about lying to each other, twenty-nine.”

Killian hums and wraps his arms around her back, pulling her closer to him while her arms lazily hang over his neck. “Yeah, well, I was under strict instructions that you weren’t to know because Graham didn’t want you to tell Ruby.”

“I can keep a secret.”

“It wasn’t my secret to tell.”

Her lip quirks to the side before she presses up on her toes and gently guides her mouth over his. “I’m glad you didn’t tell me. I like that Ruby was the one who got to tell me.”

“Me too, love.”

“All of our friends have to stop getting married. This is getting expensive.”

“Well, you shouldn’t have blown all your money on those damn boots.”

Emma slaps the back of his head even as she kisses him, and he wonders exactly where along the way did he do something right to get to have this be his life.

“Okay,” Anna yells over all of the noise, and Killian looks to see her standing on a barstool as if she needs any help commanding attention, “I know everyone is super excited right now, but let’s all be super excited over dinner. It’s time to eat.”

“Thank goodness,” Lucy breathes out. “I thought I was going to perish.”

“Where’d she learn that word?” Emma wonders as everyone starts laughing.

“I don’t even know.”

The conversation and laughter never diesdie down, not when there’s that many people around, and Killian’s stomach hurts from it all, his face a little too. His nerves about the game tomorrow and all that’s on the line haven’t disappeared, but they’re not at the forefront of his mind either. He has other things to focus on even if his mind is getting a little dizzy at the thought of keeping track of it all, but it becomes easier as the night passes, the light outside fading away into darkness, and as children move off to go to sleep, Addy and Lucy to their rooms and Leo and Roland stretched out in a guest room until their parents are ready to go home, everyone else settles into the living room with a replay of last night’s game in Boston on so that they can all watch some more footage in preparation.

He’s sitting on the floor in between Emma’s legs, and her hands are lulling him to sleep from the way that she keeps playing with his hair.

It’s like magic, her touch, and he’s utterly under her spell.

“I’m freaking the hell out about tomorrow,” Will whispers quietly as they watch him stumble over a catch in yesterday’s game.

“Me too,” Robin adds in. “Honestly, the only thing that’s keeping me calm, especially since I’m not playing, is knowing that not only did we make it to the Series last year, we won the whole damn thing.”

“Here’s the thing, though,” Killian starts as he leans her head further into Emma’s lap so that she can scratch his scalp. Damn, that might be the best feeling in the world. “No one gives a fuck about what happened last year. That trophy on our shelf from last year? It’s old news. All anyone cares about is what’s happening this year. All we should care about is what’s happening this year. Everyone always complains about those guys who can only seem to live in the glory days when the glory days are long since gone, and we’re not going to be those men. We’re not resting on our laurels. We’re going to win tomorrow, and then we’re going to win the next four games to win the whole damn thing.”

“What if we don’t?” Will questions, and for once, Killian can tell that Will is legitimately nervous.

“We’re going to, Scarlet. I won’t take another option.”

“Look at my little brother being all motivating,” Liam teases.

Killian does raise his hand and his middle finger at that. “Younger, you ass.”

“You’ll always be my little brother. I’ll stop calling you that when you’ve got three World Series championships to your name, yeah?”

“Oi, I know that I’m good, but I don’t know if I can rely on these guys to not only win this year’s but also another one after that?” Emma slaps the back of his head, and he leans back to look up at her. “I’m obviously kidding, my love.”

“Yeah, but that’s not a great way to motivate the guys for tomorrow when you had a pretty good speech going there.”

Robin coughs, something exaggerated and totally on purpose. “Killian saves his best speeches for right before a the game starts. Probably because he doesn’t have his brother and his girlfriend distracting him by making fun of him. Not that I’m complaining or anything. I’m all for taking that piss out of Killian.”

“Someone hand me a pillow,” Killian demands, looking around. “I want to knock the smirk off of Rob’s face.”

“That’s an impossible task,” Ariel starts, a bright, happy smile on her face. “Let’s go back to loving each other and watching game footage. I don’t know about you guys, but I want that trophy back. I get a bonus from both Eric and Killian’s contract for it.”

“I always knew that I liked you,” Ruby adds in, and everyone starts laughing, the long day and late night probably getting to everyone a little bit. “Do you share the bonus with your husband since he earned it? I’m asking the important questions here as someone who is about to get married?”

“Rubes.” Emma curls her fingers in his hair and shakes her head. “Are you about to be one of those people who works in that you’re engaged all the time?”

“For the next two weeks, you bet your ass I am. It would normally only be a week, but since I think all we’re about to talk about now is baseball, I’m asking for two.”

“I would expect nothing less than you.”

Everyone leaves eventually with sleepy smiles on their faces and leftovers in hand, and as nervous as Killian still is, he finds yet again that it’s not at all like last year when he was going through this all. He’s got Emma curled up next to him in bed and a happy life outside of work, and at the end of the day, his life won’t be over if they lose.

He simply doesn’t like losing.

-/-

Killian’s arm feels fine.

Good. Great even. It’s the best it’s felt in months, even if he’s still a little timid with how much he’s using it and the fear of it screwing up again since there is such a risk for that, but he feels good standing out here under the heat of the sun with thousands of people milling in the stands and thousands more sitting at home watching on their television just wondering if today is going to be the day that the Yankees officially cement their spot in the World Series with the Dodgers already waiting there.

It could be a repeat of last year, just like everyone thought it would be, and Killian damn well intends to make those thoughts come true. They’re not resting on the laurelsrelying on what happened of last year. They’re doing it for themselves once more like it’s all brand new and they don’t know the high of being at the top of the world.

Sweat trickles down Killian’s forehead past his cap, and he reaches up to remove his hat for a second while he wipes the sweat away with his forehead. It’s not hot out today, only around sixty degrees, but Killian’s skin is on fire with the rapid beating of his heart that hasn’t calmed down since this morning.

One. Two. Three.

Strike.

One. Two. Three.

Ball.

One. Two. Three.

Strike.

One. Two. Three.

Strike, he’s out.

Travis is out, the top of the fourth inning is over, Killian has thrown some damn good pitches in tight situations to keep the Sox from scoring, and the Yankees are up 4-0.

There’s still a long game to go, though.

Not for Killian, though. He’s out for the day. He knew going in that Al wouldn’t keep him in for longer than this. Honestly, he’s surprised that he allowed it for this long, but this is all so they’ll stay in the correct pitching order if they make it to the Series.

When.

Not if.

Killian wants to stay in the dugout and watch from out here, but he knows that he has to go inside and get massaged and do his cool-down exercises. He can watch from one of the televisions with everyone else who’s inside and make his way back out toward the end of the game.

It’s like all at once these games are five minutes and then suddenlysuddenly, they’re five hours.

But the time does pass as Killian goes through his routines to make sure that he’s healthy and that his arm is healthy, and by the time that he’s back out in the dugout changed into a pair of clean joggers and a pullover, his hat from earlier long gone, it’s the top of the ninth with two outs, only one man on base, and the score highly in their favor.

If they blow a 9-2 lead, they deserve to have to play it all out in a deciding game tomorrow.

“Come on, Lance,” Killian shouts out, banging his hands against the railing. “Just one more throw. One more strike, and you’re done.”

“He’s going to mess up if you keep yelling at him like that,” Al spits out as he chews on the gum he’s always chewing.

“No, no he’s not. He’s got this. We’ve got this.”

“You have far more optimism than any sideline coach should have.”

Killian turns his head to look at Al, a smile stretching across his lips. “It’s a damn good thing I’m not a coach then.”

And then there’s the sound of Lance’s ball hitting Will’s glove, the yell of the word “strike,” and the roar of the New York crowd as the game finishes.

They’re going to the World Series.

Killian’s heart pounds in his chest, emotion welling up in his throat, and all of the sounds become muted. Every single one of them except for his heart and the blood running through his veins. People yell and shout and scream, but he can’t hear any of it as he rushes out into the field to join his teammates where they’re jumping up and down, arms wrapped around each other as they become a mesh of one instead of twenty different men, those who played today and those who didn’t.

Someone pats his back, and the noises come back, cheers of celebration and curses and familiar voices of the people who he spends his life with.

They’re not resting on their laurels of last year, he thinks to himself once more. They’re achieving new things.

“Jones,” Lance calls out as the pile disperses and everyone starts moving around the field, “your girlfriend wants an interview with us.”

Killian arches a brow, spinning on his heel to try to find Emma, and he sees her standing with a microphone in her hand and Jeff standing with the camera behind her. She’s wearing the damn boots, the ones she just ordered, and if there wasn’t already a smile on his face, that would cause his lips to reach his ears.

He has no idea why Emma wants to interview him when there were five innings played without him, when Lance and Eric and Will are the guys who deserve the attention and the praise, but he knows that a lot of the time Emma isn’t in charge of who she interviews. That’s left up to the people behind the scenes.

Killian wants to kiss Emma and the smile on her face, wants to wrap her up in a hug, but he holds back, stepping up to her with Lance next to him as Frank Sinatra begins to play over the speakers. He’d think that he’d get tired of this song, but it never gets old.

“Congratulations,” Emma starts, her hand reaching up to adjust her earpiece. “That was just an incredible game. How does it feel to be going to the World Series for the second year in a row?”

She holds the microphone out to Lance. “No, no. Let Jones answer first. He usually takes the words right out of my mouth.”

“You sure?”

He nods his head, and Emma moves the microphone over to him. “Well, what do you say twenty-nine? How does it feel?”

Killian reaches up to scratch behind his ear. “I can’t curse, can I?”

“Only if you want to pay a fine.”

“Right then,” he laughs, smiling down at Emma and completely ignoring the camera. “It feels good. Better than good. This season has obviously had its ups and downs, especially for me, and I’m happy that I didn’t let this team down when they deserve so much. I’m – ”

Killian stops talking when all of the sudden Emma starts darting in the other direction, and by the time that he realizes what’s going on, the cool feel of Gatorade is being poured down on top of him so that chill bumps rise on his arms and his clothes cling to his skin. Killian sees Lance first and sees him shaking out the sticky liquid from his uniform, and then he sees Will and Eric running away with the orange container where the Gatorade once was. But then he sees Emma a few feet away absolutely laughing her ass off, and even if it goes against their agreement about how they’re going to act when working, he can’t stop himself from running toward her and immediately wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her to him as her hands push at his chest and laughter passes through her lips.

“You’re covered in Gatorade,” she laughs, still pushing at him even if he knows it’s not a true effort. “It’s sticky.” “And you ran way and let it happen.”

“Which was obviously useless considering I’m going to be covered in it now.”

“Exactly the point,” he chuckles while Emma stops squirming against him and casually wraps her arms around his neck, obviously having accepted that she’s going to be covered in Gatorade too. “We’re going to the World Series, Swan.”

“I know.” And then she kisses him.

-/-

Tag list: @authorarsinoe @stunningswan @eala-captian @galaxyzxstark @xellewoods @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @superchocovian @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings @carpedzem @tornadoamy

#catch me if you can #cs fic #cs fanfic #cs ff #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan fanfic

94 notes · View notes

yeaahishowedupatyourparty · 3 years

Photo

Disney’s Truth Booth.♥️

You can read this as OOC or an IC interview, I really don’t mind!

GENERAL QUESTIONS

1. Please state your full name: “Disney Cosette Hamilton” 2. Does your name(s) have any kind of meaning? If so, what is it?: “My Mum never wanted Park and I to have the same name as any other children around at the time - there were a lot of Lauren’s and Rebecca’s and so on...My middle name is my Mum’s - and my own - favourite character from Les Miserables.” 3. Do you have any nicknames?: “None that are said to my face, ha.” 4. Where were you born? And in which country?: “I was born in auteuil, which is in Paris, France.” 5. What is your date of birth?: “The 15th December 1995.” 6. Of course, the following question; what is your Zodiac sign? “Sagittarius.” 7. Do you believe in Zodiac signs? “Yes, but I don’t want to hear what you have to say if you don’t know your Big Three. I know many, many, many Sagittarius people that I can’t relate to because our charts are so different.” 8. Where do you live? “Violet Springs, it isn’t permanent. I plan to move to New York after.” 9. What is your home situation like? (ex. do you live with your family? Your partner etc.?) “I live with Brody and my two daughters, Dixie and Fleur, as you guys all know.” 10. Do you have any siblings? “I have a twin brother and two younger sisters.” 11. Do you have any kind of allergies? “Nope.” 12. Do you own any pets? If so, what kind of pets are they? “We have a dog - a Pomeranian called Marilyn - and then two ragdoll cats; Eliza and Angelica.” 13. Why did you apply to St Jude’s? “It was really by chance. I was initially going to go to Cambridge, but I also wanted to keep going with my acting career and St Judes just felt like a better option.” 14. Did you had to go through a lot audition rounds? "No, I didn’t technically audition. I was accepted on my resume and my previous work I’d done before coming here.” 15. What is the current course you’re following? “Acting for screen and stage.” 16. If you can switch courses, which one would you switch to and why? “Probably producing and directing. I feel like that’s an area I want to look into at some point anyway, whether I switch courses or not.” 17. What is your proudest project you’ve done? “Gigi on Broadway...The last person to have the role before me was Audrey Hepburn. How do I top that?” 18. What is the proudest project that someone’s else has done? “I feel egotistical for saying so because I’m in it, but Mason’s Gossip Girl was really before it’s time. I personally haven’t starred in a project I’ve been as invested in as that.” 19. Do you like FanCons? “Not particularly.” 20. What do you like about FanCons? “Meeting genuine supporters who have something to say for themselves, rather than just screaming at you and shoving a camera in your face.” 21. What don’t you like about FanCons? “The screaming and excessive selfies.” 22. A fan memory that always stuck with you? Can be positive or negative. “I’ve really started to enjoy getting to know the fans who work at our store. It’s really good to see them grow as people and have their own dreams - rather than just chase around people who are already living theirs.” 23. Your favorite event so far? “Good question, I really love Springs Festival.” 24. What kind of event would you like to see in the future? “I’d like to see more international events; we’re based a lot in London and the USA.” 25. Would you recommend St Jude’s to friends, family. etc? “Yes, but I’d push for them to go to Liberty or Sulayman if they could.”

PERSONALITY QUESTIONS

26. What are your positive traits? “Loyal, an overachiever and I’d say I have a good eye for aesthetics.” 27. What are you negative traits? “I don’t have any negative traits. Just ones people can’t deal with.” 28. What would other people describe you as? “Probably a perfectionist.” 29. What are your pet peeves? “People who put on a front because they want to be seen as a certain way. It’s so annoying that people would rather spend their lives pretending than actually working on themselves.” 30. What makes you happy? “My children.” 31. What makes you upset? “Things that have no place or excuse to exist nowadays; racism, homophobia, I could go on.” 32. What is something you love? “I love acting and fashion, also travel.” 33. What is something you dislike? “People who completely disregard veganism without really looking into it.” 34. What are you strengths? “Standing by my word and making things work in my favour.” 35. What are you weaknesses? “I might have a compulsive shopping problem. It’s completely possible.” 36. A misconception people often think of you? “I think a lot of people assume that I’m conservative or my family is conservative. They’re always surprised when we believe in the rich paying higher taxes, being pro-immigrant, being allies to the LGTBQ+ community. People seem to assume we’re all anti-that stuff.” 37. Do you have any fears? “Poor hygiene.” 38. What scares you the most? “Being satisfied. Imagine just, stopping? I couldn’t.” 39. What do you do to entertain yourself? “Work or shop.” 40. What is your MBTI? “I’m an ENTJ.” 41. How do you deal with stress? “I shop, or sometimes exercise if I’m feeling it.” 42. Are you a determined person? Are you a stubborn person? “I am absolutely both.” 43. Do you consider yourself selfish? “Yes. It’s not a bad thing.” 44. Would you like to be different? “Absolutely not.” 45. Are you more introverted (focused on your inner world) or more extraverted (focused on other people and the outer world)? “I would say I’m more extroverted. Although, I don’t agree with those definitions. Being an extrovert is getting your energy from external places; time with friends, the world around you...Introverts tend to be drained by it and prefer solo activities.”

ROMANCE QUESTIONS

46. What is your sexual orientation? “Heterosexual.” 47. Current relationship status? “Married.” 48. When was your first kiss? “I was eleven and it was at our family’s Christmas party.” 49. Do you remember your first date? If so, with who was it? What did you do? “It was with Brody, we were thirteen and it was after filming High School Musical 1...It was something really lame, like the cinema, but at the time it was the best thing ever for both of us.” 50. Have you ever experienced heart-break? “Yes.” 51. Have you ever been in love? (If yes, skip to question 53) “Yes.” 52. If no, how so? 53. How do you know when you’re in love? “You just know, I think it’s different for everyone. The same way that you know if you’re sad, happy or excited. It’s nothing special compared to those other feelings - people just put for weight on it.” 54. What would be your ideal date? “I’ve had it and it’s something I’d rather keep private.” 55. What is your perspective on marriage? “If it’s for you, that’s good, but nobody should feel pressured. Its not something you have to do.” 56. (only for non-virgins) Are you a sub, dom or switch? “I’m not answering that.” 57. What do you think of relationships? “They aren’t necessary but again, if it is something you want then you should go for it.” 58. What do you think of one-night stands? “They’re fine.” 59. Are you still a virgin? “I’m not.” 60. Most attractive trait in a different person? “Confidence. I hate talking to people who don’t mind or have no real opinions. I’d rather be with somebody who’s my complete opposite but stands by what they say, than someone who just borrows the opinions of others.” 61. What matters most to you when it comes to a relationship? “Perseverance.” 62. Are you comfortable with PDA? Or would you be comfortable with PDA? “In moderation, it can come off tacky if you do it too much.” 63. Are you more of a type to be asked out or the type to ask the other out? “I don’t pursue people. I’m only ever pursued.” 64. How do you express love to the other? “If I’m allowing you to vent to me or generally be in my presence for longer than a few moments and have more than surface level conversations, I obviously love you.” 65. Who is your celebrity crush? “Prince Harry.”

GETTING DEEP QUESTIONS

66. Do you regret anything? “No, regret is the enemy of progress.” 67. Is there something you woule like to re-do? So, start all over again? “No.” 68. What is something you would never share with anyone? “Yes, a lot of my personal memories. Some things between my family and I are just that.” 69. When was the last time you cried? Why did you cry? “It’s one of those never share things from the last question.” 70. Most memorable event that happened in your time in St Judes? This could be anything: “Can you remember when we all almost died in the Caribbean?” 71. One thing you wish you could do all over? “Nothing, didn’t I answer this?” 72. Someone you miss? “I miss my Grandmother a lot, we don’t see her half as much as I’d like. Especially now we have the girls.” 73. Something you wish you could forget? “Again, there isn’t anything.” 74. Who has the biggest impact on you? “Probably my Dad, there’s a lot that he’s taught me that I think has helped me with success up until now.” 75. What is your perspective on love? Is it beautiful? Does it scare you? “Neither. Love is something that you either choose to pursue or you do not. My perspective of love is that it’s been romanticised and turned into something where people go above and beyond to prove that they are more in love than someone else...I think love and romance get far too blurred. One is a lot better than the other.” 76. What has hurt you in the past that you don’t want others to go through? “I’d rather not say.” 77. What is something you have gained, something you have lost and something you let go of during the past year? “I’ve gained two daughters, I’ve lost too much sleep and I’ve let go of drinking. I was never a huge drinker anyway, but I drink even less now and it’s nicer than you’d think.” 78. Have you ever lost a friend? do you wish you would still be friends? “Yes and no. Anybody I lose, I lose for a good reason.” 79. Do you have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? “That’s a very personal question.” 80. If you could meet your 16 year old self, what would tell them? “Not to have so much self-doubt because you’re becoming exactly who you’re supposed to be. I think my 16 year old self was definitely more clued up than the average 16 year old. Also, you don’t have to dress like Cher from Clueless everyday.”

RANDOM QUESTION ROUND

81. Summer or Winter? “Winter.” 82. Cats or dogs? “Cats, I love both but cats are more independent. If they were people, they’d be better.” 83. Beach or mountains? “The beach.” 84. Phone calls or texting? “Texting.” 85. Have you ever skipped class? “Yes.”

#sjudestruthbooth #itsdisney

4 notes · View notes

isrustandstardust · 3 years

Text

1. What’s been the best day of your life so far and why?

Hard to decide, I had so many great days.

2. Describe your first kiss, who was it with, what was it like, where was it etc?

It was with my best friend at the time, in my parents garden. It was early morning after a night spent talking, her lips were really soft.

3. What’s your biggest regret? I know we all say we don’t regret things but obviously it’s how we learn, from our mistakes. So what’s something from your past you wished you could have changed?

I could have handled a break up better. I ended up hurting someone I cared for.

4. When was the last time you laughed so hard that tears fell from your face and what was it at?

With my husband, yesterday night. We were actually making fun of someone we know.

5. What is the craziest thing that you have ever done?

Moving in with a guy I barely knew in a city 400km away from all my family and friends.

6. What’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?

Nothing comes to mind rn.

7. Do you have any scars and if so, how did you get them?

I have my arms covered in scars. All of them are from self harming.

8. Where would you like to be in 10 years?

In another house, maybe abroad.

9. What are your views on drugs and alcohol?

I’m for the free of choice. I’ve tried drugs only a few times and not drinking atm.

10. What are your views on religion?

Brainwashing shit.

11. Have you ever thought about ending your own life? If so, why?

Yes, more than once. I tried, twice, when I was 21 and going through a lot. The second time I almost succeeded and woke up in the hospital after being unconscious and intubated for a week.

12. Write 5 facts people might not know about you.

- I am bipolar, borderline and have a schizoafective disorder.

- I dream about Satan and the end of the world on daily basis.

- When I was little I used look for little animals to bury and exhume after a while to see how decomposition works.

- I’ve been into witchcraft and rituals since I was 16.

- I write backwards like Leonardo Da Vinci.

13. What’s your zodiac sign and do you think it fits your personality?

I’m a Scorpio and it fits perfectly.

14. Pinpoint a moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

When my storyboard teacher remembered me from my online test because it was a perfect score.

15. Discuss your first love.

We were young and trying too hard.

16. Put your ipod on shuffle and write 5 songs that pop up. Explain why each song is on there.

- Don’t mess with me - Brody Dalle. It’s from the soundtrack of a game I love.

- Distance - 4bidden. It relaxes me.

- As the rain comes down - 0K(ill)’s. Because I’m working on their new videoclip.

- 8-MQ 16.10.2001 - 0K(ill)’s. Because it’s inspired by an Italian female serial killer. The title is composed by her initials and date of death.

- Rock and Roll - Gary Glitter. It makes me want to misbehave.

17. Name somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

Iceland.

18. What’s your earliest memory?

My dad taking me to Collodi.

19. What are your views on mainstream music?

It’s heartless and all about making money.

20. What are your highs and lows of this past year?

High: starting officially my character designer career. Low: my mother in law and old dog passing away in less than a month.

21. What are your strongest beliefs?

I believe in being direct and honest. Do no harm but take no shit.

22. Who are you closest to in your family?

My dad maybe.

23. How important do you think education is?

It’s fundamental.

24. What’s one of your favorite shows?

My 600lbs life XD

25. How have you changed in the past 2 years?

I’m more secure of myself and my capabilities.

26. Name 5 people who are famous who you find attractive.

- Tom Hiddleston.

- Mads Mikkelsen.

- Hugh Dancy.

- Michael Fassbender.

- Matthew Good.

27. Name your favorite movie and what it’s about.

3 Iron, in the mood for love. Because they’re sad but huntingly beautiful.

Stoker because psycho killers turn me on.

The fountain because is eternal and heartbreaking.

28. Who is someone who fascinates you and why?

I am fascinated by fictional characters. Like Hannibal Lecter. Yeah, again psycho killers.

29. What kind of person attracts you?

Intelligent people.

30. What’s a problem that you have recently had or are currently having?

My body is giving up on me xD

31. Name something that you miss.

The lake.

32. Share 5 goals you want completed in the next 30 days.

- Doing at least 15 designs.

- Double up my workout time.

- Completing my very first song.

- Take that online course I’ve been postponing for lack of time.

- Get a hold of a camera and go shooting.

33. What’s been the highlight of your month and the lowest point?

Highlight: doing a shit ton of sales on my shop. Lowest point: I don’t recall one, it’s been a pretty good month so far.

34. What’s something that you’ve done in the past that you would never do again?

Being the side chick.

35. What is you’re biggest insecurity & why?

Not being good enough. It can be traced back to my mom being a terrible mother.

36. What were the last 3 songs you listened to and what did they mean to you?

- Natacha Atlas - GAFSA. Because it’s in the soundtrack of 3Iron.

- Morcheeba - Over and over again. I find I’d perfectly fitting.

- Portishead - Wandering star. Because it remembers me of someone from my past.

37. Do you have a toy that’s really special to you and if so what is it, how did you get it etc?

I had a plush of a rhino called Mr. Turkelton [Scrubs reference] that was so dear to me. It’s with my ex, we bought it together and he kept it. Still miss him tho.

38. Have you lost anyone close to you to death?

My mother in law. She was more of a mom to me than my own mother.

39. What is your purpose in life?

Being happy and create beautiful things.

40. When was the last time you cried and what was it over?

I do not remember, but I guess it was during my mil’s funeral.

41. If you got to spend an entire day with your favourite celebrity what would you guys do?

I would love to spend a day with the Mass Effect’s cast playing the game!

42. If you could only listen to one artist for the rest of your life, who would you choose and why?

Tool. Because I’m a masochist.

43. What are 3 traits that you like about yourself and what are three that you dislike about yourself? Personality wise.

Likes:

- Being open minded.

- Being stubborn.

- Being so will powered.

Dislikes:

- Being insecure.

- Being so unable to handle rage that I keep extremely calm until the moment I explode and get cruel and violent.

- Being unable to let go of things that enrage me.

44. Can you cook? If so what are your favorite dishes to make?

I’m pretty good at it. I love to make fresh pasta.

45. What was the last decision you regretted making?

Drinking that glass of milk, now my stomach hurts.

46. Who’s opinion of yourself do you value the most?

Mine. And then my husband’s. I don’t care of no one else’s opinion.

47. What’s the nastiest thing you’ve ever said to another human being and what drove you to say it?

I demolished a guy who was in love with me telling him exactly what I knew it would break him. I did it because he tried to act like I was his property and then got aggressive when I didn’t act accordingly.

48. What’s the nastiest thing anyone has ever said to YOU? Or something that’s hurt you above anything else and why?

Nasty things don’t get to me, I don’t listen to what people say, especially when it comes from someone I don’t care for or I despise. The things that hurt me the most was saying goodbye to someone I was not ready to let go.

49. You can ask your favourite celebrity 3 questions and she’s taken a magical truth pill so she will 100% answer honestly, what do you ask?

Maybe some technical stuff, Idk. I have no ‘favorite celebrity ‘ so...

50. What mark would you want to leave on this world after you are gone?

I don’t care about leaving a mark in a dying world tbh.

51. What makes you most angry?

Liars, incoherent people, delusional people, copycats.

52. Who do you think is a really underrated artist and what do you love about them?

There are a lot of really underrated artists out there trying their very best and being bashed by online algorithms. Support the artists you like!

53. What are the main qualities you look for when thinking about a significant other?

Intelligence, honesty and having moral values.

54. What’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?

The first that comes to mind is waiting at home for me to return with a hot bath ready and a bed full of rose petals. It’s a cliche,Iknow. But I was young and in love.

55. What is one of your favorite memories?

I have so many, but thinking about the past makes me feel bittersweet.

56. What do you do when you really want to impress someone?

I just act normal, if they’re impressed, good. If not, it’s ok.

57. What are your 3 favourite animals and why?

- Snakes: They’re so fascinating.

- Crows: they’re extremely intelligent.

- Sharks: natural born predators.

58. What’s the nicest present you’ve ever received?

A trip to Paris and a trip to Disneyland.

59. People always go around saying ‘oh I’m their biggest fan’, but what does being a truly big fan of someone mean to you?

Idk, I just like people. I don’t obsess over them.

I obsess over things I like, but not over some individual I don’t know.

60. Have you ever wanted to change anything about your life? If so, what?

I want more money XD

61. What is something you feel like you are really good at?

Drawing. Hopefully making music, but it’s way to early to say.

62. What is something you feel like you can get better at?

Drawing, there’s always room for improving.

63. What is something you feel like you are really bad at?

Hiding when I despise someone. And bowling.

64. If you were given $3,000,000 to put towards 3 charities/foundations ($1 mil each obvs), what would you choose and why?

Wildlife protection, animal shelters, planet’s preservation.

65. What’s one thing someone has done for you that was really small but made a huge impact?

My roommates came back from Xmas holidays one day earlier to have dinner with me because I was alone. And another brought me Xmas dinner a few days before.

66. What do you do when you can’t sleep?

I work :/

67. What’s something that’s on your bucket list?

Make a nice home studio.

68. If you could change 3 things within your government, what would they be and why?

I would actually change the opponent party. They’re dreadful.

69. What’s your favourite holiday and why?

Xmas, because it feels like happiness.

70. What’s the kindest thing a stranger has ever done for you? Even if it’s TINY like holding a door open for you, something that you rememer even though they were a complete stranger.

A stranger helped me when my nose was bleeding like crazy and I was alone in a mall. He also bought me an orange juice.

71. Who’s your favorite cartoon character?

Motoko Kusanagi.

72. What’s the first song that comes to your mind while reading this and why?

Reptile - NIN. Don’t know why.

73. Put the 7 deadly sins in order of the one you commit the most to the least.

Wrath - Lust - Pride - Sloth - Greed - Gluttony - Envy.

74. What would you like to be the first dance song at your wedding?

I’m already married and we danced over Christian Woman by Type 0 Negative XD

75. Have you ever been told you look like a famous person, if so, who?

Someone told me I look like Butterfly from Death Proof and like Amy Lee from Evancescence.

I really don’t see it.

76. What’s one thing you can not live without?

Art. And music.

77. What is the most selfless thing you have ever done for someone?

Going away.

78. Do you hate someone.

No, I dislike a lot of people, I think the world would be better off if some of them would die, it I do not hate them.

79. What are 3 things that have happened in your life that you’ve never forgotten? Big or small, just things you know you won’t ever forget and still seem crystal clear now.

- Almost dying.

- Getting married.

- Signing for my very first house.

80. What comes first to you out of friendships and relationships, and why?

They’re equally important.

81. What’s your favourite children’s tv show/movie?

Muppets: a Christmas Carol.

82. What song makes you cry the most?

Together we will live forever - Clint Mansell.

83. What’s the funniest film you’ve ever seen?

Operation Petticoat.

84. What’s something crazy that you’ve always wanted to do?

Trying human flesh.

85. Has anything ever happened to you that you just can’t forgive?

A lot. Just, a lot.

86. What’s your biggest fear?

Being abandoned.

87. What is your favorite food?

Red meat, pistachio ice cream.

88. Least favorite food? Why?

Celery.

89. Have you ever felt ashamed about something? If so what was it & why?

Not that I recall of.

90. Do you keep a journal? If so what mostly goes in it? Random thoughts, feelings, stories?

I always keep a journal, I write in it pretty much everything, dreams, feelings, ideas, thoughts.

91. When was the last time you said something nice to someone & what made you do it?

This morning to my husband, because he deserves it.

92. How do you feel when someone says something mean/disrespectful towards your fave celeb?

Couldn’t care less? Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, even if it’s a shitty one.

93. What’s the saddest story/one that’s touched you the most that you’ve ever heard on the news?

Milena Quaglini’s.

94. If you were told you were going to have 3 daughters, what would you want to name them?

Violante, Lavinia and Artemisia.

95. Do you have a middle name and if so, what is it?

I have two. Valeria and Maria.

96. How did your name get chosen? What’s the story behind it?

My dad found it in a sci-fi book back when he was a teenager. It was the name of the first baby girl born on the moon.

97. What’s the craziest thing you’ve done for each of your faves e.g. waiting in line for hours, getting up early to see them on tv etc?

I watched a streaming reunion in the middle of the night on N7 day.

98. Are you a virgin?

No.

99. What are the stories behind your tattoos/piercings and if you don’t have any, would you like any?

I have wings because I’ve always been obsessed with winged figures and angels.

I have a lot of movies/books quotes because they all means something to me.

I have cherry petals because of Hagakure.

The snowflake is the reminder of a very important person.

The moth is for my self destructive tendencies.

The witch is a homage to me.

The strawberry is a silly Adventure Time reference.

The snake is a biblical reference to both Lilith and Satan.

The Santa Muerte and the black goat are both linked to my beliefs.

100. Do you want to say something to the world?

Stop being stupid, stop making stupid people famous, open a book.

#survey #me #about me #books #tattoos #ink #music

2 notes · View notes

sinsbymanka · 4 years

Text

50 Questions You Have Never Been Asked

Tagged by @lostinfantasies38! Tagging - @tuffypelly, @corylion, @eranehn, @silvanils, @fandomn00blr, @odekiax, and whoever else wants in!

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?

And immediately I have to reveal how high maintenance I am. I have four. They’re red, teal, and black and they’re all different no matter what my husband says.

2. A food you never eat?

Tapioca - I’m allergic (which is a shame because BUBBLE TEA. It looks so fun!!)

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?

Always cold - I struggle with pretty chronic iron deficiency so I’m an icicle.

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

I think I was eating Chinese food?

5. What is your favorite candy bar?

Twix. Either side.

6. Have you ever been to a professional sporting event?

I have been to far too many. The only ones I like are hockey (yay!) but I’ve been to Basketball and Baseball games. The last time I went to a basketball game, I read a novel on my phone. Husband was not amused.

7. What was the last thing you said out loud?

"Why are you like this?” - To the infamous watermelon head puppers as he put his whole damn noggin on my shoulder.

8. What is your favorite ice cream?

Mint chocolate chip.

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

Cream top tea from the Chinese restaurant

10. Do you like your wallet?

It’s the best wallet I’ve ever owned and I’ve had it for like four years. I refuse to get another one.

11. What was the last thing you ate?

Cold sesame noodles and dumplings

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

I don’t think so but I’ve done a lot of online shopping, it’s all a blur. I just wait to see what shows up in the mail.

13. The last sporting event you watched?

Does watching my husband play NBA 2K20 count? If no - then I think we went to a minor league hockey game in January or February?

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

ALRIGHT. Bear with me. Pop your popcorn and then dump some hidden valley ranch dressing mix seasoning packets on it. BEST. THING. EVER. (I’ve been told you can buy ranch seasoning shakers for popcorn, but I’ve never tried them, I just use the seasoning packets)

15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to?

My Husband: “I love you too babe.” cause we’re sweet like that.

16. Ever go camping?

Yes, I’m not a fan. I’m like a houseplant - I like the idea of outside but if you put me out there I will die.

17. Do you take vitamins?

So many.

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?

Nope and I never will again.

19. Do you have a tan?

Not currently, but I do tan! God bless whoever the swarthy skin tone came from.

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?

Chinese food.

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?

No? What kind of monster does this on the regular? Don’t use straws unless you have to - it’s bad for the turtles.

22. What color socks do you usually wear?

I dislike socks - I usually wear tights because I’m wearing skirts and dresses.

23. Ever drive above the speed limit?

The better question: Do you ever drive below the speed limit?

24. What terrifies you?

Many things. The biggest thing, lately, is that I’m not doing enough to get this world back on track and that I should be doing more. The time for discussion, negotiation, and bargaining for basic human rights is over. I want to smash windows, tear down institutions, and torch mansions.

25. Look to your left what do you see?

Watermelon head, just where he always is.

26. What chore do you hate?

I hate the sound of the vacuum cleaner. Absolutely hate it.

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

Immediately of Steve Irwin. I watched a shit ton of animal planet as a child.

28. What is your favorite soda?

I can’t drink soda very often because it makes be a bit ill - but I love coke.

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

I also can’t have fast food often because it me very ill. So when I do stop - it’s usually to satisfy my ever present french fry craving and I feel silly going in and ordering one thing.

30. Who was the last person you talked to?

The chinese food delivery guy or watermelon head if he counts.

31. Favorite cut of beef?

The other thing that makes me sick! I rarely eat beef, even when I cook it for my husband. The only thing I usually can’t resist is a mean sloppy joe or taco - so that would be ground beef done extra lean which probably doesn’t count.

32. Last song you listened to?

This is Me - Kesha from The Greatest Showman soundtrack

33. Last book you read?

Also fanfiction. I have no spoons for new fiction at this time. I’m making my way through some nonfiction books slowly - “Michael and Natasha” by Rosemary and Donald Crawford is my current choice.

34. Favorite day of the week?

Fridays?

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?

Possibly?

36. How do you like your coffee?

Flavored creamer if possible - if not just cream. I never seem to get the sugar ratio right on my own.

37. Favorite pair of shoes?

My utterly impractical, goes with one outfit, red high heeled mary jane’s. God I love those shoes.

38. At what time do you usually go to bed?

Between 10 and 11p - I take medicine that knocks me out pretty quick at night.

39. At what time do you normally get up?

Between 5 and 7a? I don’t know when I turned into my father - but I’m up with the fucking sun no matter what.

40. What do you prefer - sunrises or sunsets?

Sunrises - especially over the ocean.

41. How many blankets are on your bed?

On the bed? Two. Beside my side of the bed? Four more. Plus the dog has a blanket. Don’t judge me.

42. Describe your kitchen plates?

Vintage find - white with yellow and orange daffodils.

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?

Wine to get started, but I almost always end up switching to whiskey if I’m out.

44. Do you play cards?

I learned to play poker very young and I’m surprisingly good at it.

45. What color is your car?

It’s called Seafoam, which is a pretty pearlescent green <-- same?! @lostinfantasies38 do you drive a Subaru too?

46. Can you change a tire?

YES. My father, when he was losing his eyesight and I was sixteen, wanted me to know how to change my own oil and my own tires cause “he wouldn’t be able to see to do it.” Before that makes you too sad - he 100% still sat in the driveway and listened to me do these things while offering “advice.” Bonus: I was one of the only people of either gender I knew in college who could do these things.

Do I actually do them any longer? fuck no. I don’t want to get dirty and I got myself a husband.

47. What is your favorite province?

I’ve only ever been to Toronto, so whatever province that’s in.

48. Favorite job you ever had?

I don’t know if I have a favorite? I’ve gotten to travel a lot in my current job, and I’ve done a lot of presentations and met a lot of people I wouldn’t have otherwise, plus it’s less hazardous to my mental health. So. Grantwriter/Researcher it is.

49. How did you get your biggest scar?

In November 2019 (which seems like forever ago but I know it wasn’t) I was rear-ended by an 18 wheeler on the highway. It was a nasty crash and I still can’t quite drive on the highway. I was actually nearly completely unscathed despite rolling my car and it being totaled. I emerged with a concussion and two cuts - one on the back of my left hand which is small. I had another shallow cut which is mostly hidden under my hair, but I can feel the scar. It does creep out under my hair onto my forehead about a half-inch.

50. What did you do today that made someone happy?

On my morning walk with watermelon head, we stopped outside our neighbors house to wave through the window so their kiddos could see puppers. Judging from their faces - they were pretty happy (but who wouldn’t be to be greeted with watermelon head?)

#long ask meme #so many questions

13 notes · View notes

itszephoria · 3 years

Text

Saw this pop up and your followers ask you which ones they’re interested in. But people don’t really ask much when I post or they don’t ask the ones that might make you feel uncomfortable. And well, honestly I’m so bored that I’ve decided to break all the damn rules and just answer all the questions because I can. *shock horror*

So information dump on the ‘Be nosy’ that popped up in my feed today. If you’re interested.

Be nosy

1. What’s your sexual orientation?

Straight. But maybe for the right woman I could sway but wouldn’t go so far as to call myself bi or bi-curious though.

2. What are you obsessed with right now?

Obsessively obsessing about my health and how to get well and failing it all. Oh and anime movies on Netflix.

3. Ever done any drugs?

I do drugs everyday. But I assume this is referring to illegal. No and was strictly no up until recently. I now take marijuana oil on a regular basis for pain management. Also being stoned/high is not pleasant and I don’t understand why people would enjoy that as a leisurely pastime.

4. What piercings do you want?

I want to get my ears pierced again. Holes have closed up, but currently due to my health that’s not possible. I can’t even enjoy clipons :(

5. How many people have you kissed?

The massive number of 5.

6. Describe your dream home.

It’s tiny in the sense it has all the space I need. A cosy tiny-like home. But not one on wheels, fixed to the ground. And it would be made of all natural materials, stone and wood. It would be unique and resemble something out of a fairy tale. It would sit a beautiful clearing with only nature to view in the distance and all the animals and wildlife would stay well away because I’m pretty much terrified of all it,

7. Who are you jealous of?

Healthy, painfree people. I am jealous of past me who didn’t realise how lucky she was and miss her.

8. What’s your favorite show to binge?

I don’t binge any show on repeat. I’d rather look for a new show to watch or enjoy, there are so many. The last shows I binged in two days was Queen’s Gambit and Emily in Paris.

9. Do you watch porn?

Yep. But struggle with it because it’s overdramatic, unrealistic and would kill or someone to make porn with a decent storyline with people that can act.

I prefer to read it if I’m honest or maybe just write it for myself.

10. Do you have a secret sideblog?

Sort of? More like my other one I used I was known for all my slash writings in F1. But now I just hang out here.

11. If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?

No where. The world is riddled with co-vid and well, I’m probably in one of the safest countries and I’m at risk of death should I catch it. So I’ll stay here in my safe bubble.

12. What’s one of your fantasies?

I wake up tomorrow and I’m not me. I wake up and I can take a deep breath without gasping for air, I wake up in no pain, I wake up and my body isn’t terribly scared, I wake up and can have a ‘normal’ life.

13. Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced?

Nope and no desire too. Won’t that just hurt?

14. How would you spend a million dollars?

I’d by that dream house I described, set everything up to be self sufficient. Pay and travel to try every cure available for my diseases. And then bank the rest and live off interest. Or maybe donate it. I don’t want money and I don’t really want a lot of things.

15. Are you in a relationship?

Yep and it’s a struggle and am constantly fighting to prove it’s worth continuing. Oh and that’s a relationship with myself.

16. Do you follow porn blogs?

No.

17. Are you angry with anyone right now?

No, I suppose it’s more disappointed and let down by people more than angry. I’m working everyday on letting it go but it’s not easy.

18. What tattoos do you want?

I have always wanted one, but have never found something that I really loved and haven’t been imaginative enough to create something unique. The older I get though, I’m not sure I want one. I did for the longest time though think about getting a Ferrari tattooed on my inner wrist, but pleased I never did that. I don’t love the sport or Ferrari enough anymore to want a permanent reminder of that.

19. If you could change your name, would you? What would you change it to?

I am changing name actually. Hoping to action that in the next two weeks. I would have done it earlier but they closed the borders. I have a dutch sir name that has two words. It confuses every one, systems don’t get it, it has caused issues with plane tickets. And well I’ve decided no more and am dumping a portion of it.

20. What is something you’re obsessed with?

This is a duplicate. Skipping.

21. Describe your best friend.

When you meet her for the first time she can be a little crazy and wild, and she kind of scared at me first because she’s so unlike me. But as you got to know her, the *real* her she doesn’t let people see, you realise how kind and soft she is, and she’s the most empathic person I have known. She gives so much of herself to everyone, thinks so little of herself and her needs because she’s one of the most selfless people I know. I love her more than most of my family and would do anything for her.

22. Tag someone you think is hot.

Is this followers? Uh most I don’t know what they look like? I assume they’re all hot!

23. Who are five of your favorite bands/musical artists?

Don’t have any really. My music is varied and is based on my mood and really changes around. And with most bands, I generally lean towards one or two songs. This is one of those questions I really struggle with whenever I see it. Will say however, have been enjoying The Beatles recently and a bit of old school stuff.

24. What are three places you want to travel?

Japan. Norway. Canada.

25. Describe your perfect Friday night.

Generally hanging out with people I like. Enjoying a good wine, some cheese, either playing some board game or dungeons and dragons, or watching a really good movie. Good company makes any night a good night.

26. What’s your favorite season?

Autumn. One because I think it’s neglected as a choice and every season should be loved, and two because I love the colours of autumn and the colours associated with autumn.

27. What’s your pet peeve?

I’m sure I have a heap of them, but currently it’s people that have an issue with you and instead of being an adult and talking to you about them choose to silence and blank you. I’m so tired of it, I’ve quit being peacemaker in those situations, those people are no longer worthy in my book.

28. Who is the funniest person you know?

Uh... I don’t think anyone I know is super funny. Friends and family all have a good sense of humor. But out of my circle of life people I’m always told I’m the funny one, which I find the biggest joke ever.

29. What’s the most overrated movie?

Can not think of anything off the top of my head. I will say if I think a movie is getting too much hype I refuse to watch it, whether all the reviews are raving or not. It’s why I didn’t watch Harry Potter for like ten years or any of the new Star Wars movies. I just refuse to be apart of all the hype and jump on bandwagons.

30. Tag someone you want to talk to but have been too shy to message.

I’d love to talk to everyone. I’m shy to start any conversations to be honest and I think all the people I talk to regularly were the first to message me, and I love them for it.

31. Do you like paper books or ebooks better?

100% love an old fashioned paper book. The texture of the paper. The smell of a book. That being said, I don’t think I’ve picked up a proper book to read in years. I live in fan fiction more than anything or am busy writing myself.

32. If you could live in a fictional world, what world would you pick?

Any of the disney worlds, anything from the past, or verging on fantasy like. I want a simpler time not full of technology which I grow to hate more each day. The older I get the more I’m pretty sure I’ve been born in the wrong decade.

33. If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like?

I’d build the perfect wardrobe capsule. Everything would be of high quality, not necessarily brand name and all the clothes would be sourced from ethical businesses or be handmade.

I like classic pieces, love the fashion of the 50′s and 60s and while stylish it would be comfortable to wear and everything could be worn in public (sorry comfy tracky pants).

34. What’s your coffee order?

There ain’t no coffee order. I don’t drink it. Sorry @leoni-speedyf1 I know how addicted you are to it, happy to buy you anything you like though :P

35. Do you have a crush on anyone?

In real life? No one.

36. Do you still have feelings for any of your exes?

Not romantic. I have feelings in that I hope they’re doing well, achieving what they want and they’re all happy. I didn’t have any ‘bad’ breakups and all my relationships ended very amicably.

37. Have any tattoos?

No. See above for more on this.

38. Do you drink?

Rarely. Can’t with medication and condition. But on occasion I do enjoy a good glass of red. Pinot Noir is my preference.

39. Are you a virgin?

Nope.

40. Do you have a crush on any of your mutuals?

Not in a romantic way? The ones I talk to regularly I love immensely though.

41. How many followers do you have?

42. Describe the hottest person you know.

Uh all the men I know I am not attracted to. Probably a good thing as they’re either family or partnered with a friend or family member.

43. What’s your guilty pleasure?

Can’t think of anything. I try not to feel guilt for anything I enjoy to be honest, whether it’s food or an activity. Life is too short for that.

44. Do you read erotica?

Yep. Even write it.

45. What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?

It was a few years back. I met this guy online and we went to the city and spent most of that time just strolling next to the river for our first meet up. Why was it the worst date ever? Well it wasn’t the location that’s for sure.

The guy had two kids, and I’m a firm believer all parents have favourites, though I have yet to meet a parent that will voice that aloud. This guy, had no qualms with telling me about this favourite kid, and that wouldn’t be a problem if didn’t spend just as much putting down his younger son. It kind of left me reeling and wondering how his son felt if his dad didn’t hide just how much he didn’t like him as a person. The kid was four and the reason his dad didn’t like him was because he didn’t like bikes.

And so the guy was a bmx rider so he spent the rest of the time on our walk just pointing out all the tricks he could do. He didn’t ask about me, only talked about himself. It was also lunch time and assumed we would get something to eat together, but nope, no food was offered. And when I suggested to get something to drink because it was so hot and we’d been out in the sun for like an hour, he just took me to a subway and told me to get a drink and waved me to the line. No offer to join me, no offer to pay (which doesn’t bother me btw, but this was capping off a terrible day), no offer to get food.

I was so happy to get out of there. Didn’t speak to him again once I had left.

46. How many people do you follow?

I currently follow 59 people. I don’t follow anyone that creates drama, and try and follow only people that post about F1 as that’s all I use tumblr for now.

47. If you could marry any celebrity, who would you pick?

Either Sebastian Vettel or Ryan Reynolds. Both are married though, so I don’t think that’s going to turn into a reality anytime soon.

48. Describe your ideal partner.

I want someone that shares the same core values as me. Doesn’t want kids, isn’t super religious (grew up in a cult like religion so I avoid it now), is on the minimalist side and isn’t someone that needs new things things all the time or is desperate to replace something the moment they deem it out of date. Someone that doesn’t live their life on social media. Someone that prefers simple things, someone who is kind and giving, and someone that truly loves me - and it’s the last part that I struggle with finding more than anything with all the guys I have dated.

I am currently not looking for a partner, I am not in a place for a relationship and am fully focused on myself. And I am very content with that decision.

49. Who do you text the most?

Currently my bestie.

50. What’s your favorite kind of weather?

Clear blue skies and a warm day to enjoy the sun. But there are times when I simply love the rain, hearing it on the room, watching it fall endlessly and knowing that everything will be green from it.

#all about me #long read #tried to be open and honest

2 notes · View notes

hazzabeeforlou · 4 years

Text

Digging Deeper

Thanks @alienfuckeronmain for the tag, this I’ve loved reading everyone’s, and I tag @taintedlav @rahashirley @raisemybody @twopoppies @cuethetommo @metal-eye and @seasurfacefullofclouds1 if anyone wants to play!!

1. Do you prefer writing with a black pen or blue pen? ink color matters less than ball-point-ness...

2. Would you prefer to live in the country or city? I want a witch’s cottage with a giant messy garden on the edge of the moors and a forest a million miles away from everyone. So country.

3. If you could learn a new skill what would it be? I’ve actually stretched myself this summer! Am learning French and guitar, and idk if it counts but learning my new job which I NEVER thought I could handle lol since I’ve never worked retail

4. Do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? Honey ;)

5. What was your favourite book as a child? Well I have to say Narnia and Redwall, but when I was very tiny I loved this book about a girls who could whistle and speak to animals (named Mable) and the Velveteen Rabbit, and a book called “The Lost Princess” which is fucking amazing, by the precursor to CS Lewis, George MacDonald

6. Do you prefer baths or showers? I usually take showers because baths take too much time. Also baths are romantic and that makes me sad, and also I have to look at my body which, ug, not prepared to do that all the time rip

7. If you could be a mythical creature, which one would it be? Mer. Fucking. Maid. Though I’ve always wanted to fly too, I used to spend HOURS in the water just underwater swimming with my legs stuck together just pretending to be on ocean adventures

8. Paper or electronic books? I usually much prefer paper, but since I got these blue light blocking glasses I am finding i’m fine either way physically. Soul-wise though, yeah, paper

9. What is your favourite item of clothing? Probably my mango colored crop hoodie that I once smashed melting frozen blueberries on and then spent hours and days getting the stains out...

10. Do you like your name or would you like to change it? My real name is super boring and typical, though I do like it. I enjoy my tumblr name a lot, Toni, and it feels more genderless and constrictive than my actual name lol

11. Who is a mentor to you? I’ve had so many great teachers, but the biggest lesson I’ve learned in life is that so many you admire can be deeply flawed. I have lots of trust issues. I only take advice from a select few people, and they don’t include anyone ‘old and wise’ lol

12. Would you like to be famous and if so, what for? Oh for sure, I used to want to be an actress or a rock star or whatever. Famous author. I would fucking LOVE to have a platform and help people and cheer people up and see people grocery shopping and have instant friends. I know that sounds terribly naive but I’ve said before I share a lot of Harry’s personality, and I just love flirting with people and smiling with them and giving hugs. Now, I would want to be famous as TONI me and not real me, because then I could never be myself because my fam would find out rip

13. Are you a restless sleeper? Depends on my mattress. Currently, yes, ugg. I wake up in an omega nesting scene from a fic every morning

14. Do you consider yourself a romantic person? Unfortunately yes.

15. Which element best represents you? idk I usually say fire but I’m feeling more water lately

16. Who do you want to be closer to? I’m working on getting to know my amazing sister better, and that’s been lovely.

17. Do you miss someone at the moment? All my friends have been long distance for actual years, so i don’t miss anymore more than normal. I am missing just... the POTENTIAL for someone. This indefinite distancing is wearing on me.

18. Tell us about an early childhood memory. I was like two or three, and we were out on a full moon walk and I was in my stroller in the red sheepskin bundled up, and I remember coming up our sidewalk and looking at the world and moon and thinking, “remember this moment, or you’re going to grow up and forget how wonderful it was.” Also when I was five I had a breakdown on my mom’s lap because “I’m going to grow up and be too big to be sung lullabies to!” and I didn’t want anything to change EVER

19. What is the strangest thing you have eaten? I used to make a concoction of rye crackers, mustard, and pickles. Don’t ask

20. What are you most thankful for? all the opportunities I’ve had in life. I’m so massively privileged

21. Do you like spicy food? depends on how hot

22. Have you ever met someone famous? I saw a few celebs in NYC, Shosh from Girls, the guy from Monk, Tim Gun, John Oliver (and his golden retriever) and I passed a drunk as a skin Alec Baldwin outside Lincoln Center one day. Probably other people I didn’t recognize. Oh and S**** M***** rented my instrument right before covid hit here, and drunk him (or high him) couldn’t believe he had a h*** to play around on, and then I saw him staring at mountains being the most stereotypical rich white boy ever, also he did not send out gay vibes but don’t let that stop your Shiall, please don’t let it

23. Do you do you keep a diary or journal? I almost always start with the new year and do like. A day. And then forget.

24. Do you prefer to use a pen or a pencil? PEN

25. What is your star sign? Aries sun, Aquarius moon, Pisces rising

26. Do you like your cereal soggy or crunchy? Depends on the cereal, those golden grams were BEST thoroughly soaked in milk fight me

27. What would you want your legacy to be? make the world a little better

28. Do you like reading, what was the last book you read? Yes but you know, i’m the worst at making time for it. Still getting through that Brief Interviews with Hideous Men or whatever it is

29. How do you show someone you love them? Just thinking of them and doing little things to surprise them, I think

30. Do you like ice in your drinks? Yep the smaller and more crush friendly the better

31. What are you afraid of? I really do not. like. limb loss. no horror movies for me EVER

32. What is your favourite scent? wet Labrador because it means there’s a WET LABRADOR

33. Do you address older people by their name or surname? surname always unless I’ve always known them by firsts. Religion, man

34. If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? I have this dream of buying up all the land shitty developers snatch up in this country and ceding it back to its rightful owners. I’ve legit cried over little forests turned into parking lots, thanks Joni Mitchell

35. Do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? pools are so clean and have no sharks or jellyfish. that said, they also have no waves...

36. What would you do if you found £50 on the ground? turn it into the store it was closest to. I’m the lawful good box and yes I hate it

37. Have you ever seen a shooting star? YES in Breckenridge one year I saw a fucking meteor shower! I’ve wished on some, they’ve never come true I don’t think.

38. What is the one thing you would want to teach your children? I’m too scared to have children even if I could (I can’t) because of the pressure of what would fuck them up and what wouldn’t

39. If you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? I love my baby tat @alienfuckeronmain gave me, idk if I’d want another one someday, maybe a sister tat with my sis

40. What can you hear now? The fan, my typing, my parents watching old TV shows

41. Where do you feel the safest? With a pet outside in nature somewhere

42. What is the one thing you want to overcome/conquer? putting limits on things /myself/people

43. Of you could travel back to any era, what would it be? You know I used to really DREAM about this shit, but since I realized I would have genetically DIED in any other era, and that my dreaming was a literal result of white privilege since it would fucking SUCK to be anyone else (I mean even now it’s awful wtf) I just. Stick with the present.

44. What is your most used emoji? the laughing face. oops.

45. Describe yourself using one word. Supercalifragelisticexpialidocious

46. What do you regret the most? I have so many. social. anxiety. nightmares from my 28 years of life that haunt me

47. Last movie you saw? l think it was the Downton Abbey movie?

48. Last tv show you watched? Monk

49. Invent a word and it’s meaning. Surplumn. a really divinely wonderful thing, like ‘oh her lips are surplumn’ like a juicy chocolate mousse and perky breasts idk

#tag games #this was fun but did take forever lol #about me

7 notes · View notes