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xxsabitoxx · 3 months

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Ryomen Sukuna NSFW A-Z

Part of my 20k follower celebration (past due)

Warnings: if it isn’t abundantly clear, this is smut :)

A/N: in honor of hitting 20k followers a while back, I’m going to be posting 10 NSFW alphabets for JJK men — scheduled post 11 :) - I've developed an unhealthy obsession with true form Sukuna... he is all I think about now. Forgive me because this one is for sure a bit OOC since he like... loves you

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

If you managed to break the hollow icy shell that is Sukuna’s heart and make yourself someone important to him… Sukuna is pretty damn good with aftercare. He’ll clean you up, even ordering someone to get numbing salves because he tore you the fuck up and he know’s you’ll be sore and aching within a few hours if you aren’t already. He’ll use two arms to cradle you gently while his other set works on cleaning you up and making sure you’re okay. He’ll wait until you’re sleeping to whisper praises to you, telling you that you did so well for him and that he adores you. He’ll never really say these things to you when you’re awake though.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Sukuna loves your legs and thighs, he loves your hips and your stomach too. He loves having things to hold and your body provides so much softness for him. He loves to kneel before you – that’s right the king of curses kneeling before you – to lick all the way from the top of your foot up to your inner thigh. He’ll cover your legs in bruises and bites, making sure everyone is well aware that you are his property and nobody else can have you. He adores your stomach, often resting his head against it and letting you pet his hair lovingly. Sukuna will only show this level of vulnerability to you, letting down some – not all – of his walls.

Sukuna loves his entire body, four arms, two mouths, two dicks, and all. He considers it his masterpiece and it deserves to be worshiped. He has no shame in proclaiming this either.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

If he’s not dumping several loads into your cunt/ass then what’s the point? Sukuna treats his cum just as he treats the rest of his body… It's sacred and a privilege to have it. He toys with the idea of painting your face or chest in it but ultimately doesn’t see the point in letting something so valuable go to waste. So creampies are the only way in Sukuna’s eyes. And trust me when I say this man cums a fucking boat-load. I don’t care if it’s realistic or not, he’s making you look bloated by the time he’s done with you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Sukuna would let you do anything you wanted to him… he just hasn’t found the strength to give you that knowledge yet. He hates the idea of someone holding power over him, which is why he’s ever so mildly terrified of you. You may not realize it, but you have Sukuna wrapped around your finger… that man would kill the entire planet for you if it meant seeing you smile.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Sukuna is very experienced, having tens if not hundreds of harlots laying around for his use. But that was before you. You changed his view on that sort of thing and he got rid of every single one of them… you are all he needs to remain satisfied and that is a feeling Sukuna never thought he'd experience in his existence. Sukuna knows what he’s doing and he knows what he’s doing well.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Sukuna’s favorite position is holding you up so your back is pressed to his chest. He has a hand hooked under each of your knees and he’s holding you up that way, spreading you apart further than your legs really allow. Sukuna is either sitting or standing and honestly he prefers when a mirror is present so he can watch your face contort in a mix of pain and pleasure. He has you impaled on his cock, easily able to trust in and out of you as you fall apart.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Not even a hint of goofiness in this man when he fucks you. He is all about business… I mean for real it was actually kind of terrifying at first but now you’re used to it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Sukuna doesn’t really give a shit about his hair down there… and yes it’s pink like the rest of his hair. It may sound fucking bizarre but if you want to trim and clean him up down there? He’ll let you do it. You bathe him often so it’s not necessarily out of your comfort zone to sit there and groom his nether region. He doesn’t really care what you do down there either. You can simply trim him to your liking or shave him bald. Whatever you’re into, he truly doesn’t care.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Sukuna is… romantic in his own way. He’s not detached from the situation at hand and he’s not focused entirely on himself. Sukuna shows his “romantic” side by letting you cum, maybe sparing you a few kisses, rubbing his thumb across the nail marks he left on your legs… he’s not one to say “I love you” or really express how much you mean to him. But it’s the small, subtle little things that hint towards his affection for you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He’s got four hands, you’d think he’d use one of them to get himself off but he simply doesn’t see a need for that when he can have a random whore come do it for him. When it comes to you though? You never leave him, like Uraume, you’ve earned your spot by his side. He has you to assist him with those kinds of needs when they arise (heh). Though, he’s amused you once or twice by jerking himself off for your own enjoyment. Making a show of using two hands to jerk off his two cocks but stopping just before he comes because – as i’ve said – he doesn’t like to waste any of it, not a single drop can be spared.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Slave/Master kink for one… he just likes the feeling of being superior even though he doesn't need to “roleplay” to get that feeling. BDSM… or whatever equivalent there is for the Heian period. He likes it rough, messy, even a little bloody. Sukuna has a massive breeding kink but doesn’t want kids, he just likes the idea of filling you over and over again (regardless if you have the ability to get pregnant or not). Dacryphilia for sure, your tears turn him on. Orgasm control (both denying and overstimulation) are just another aspect that plays into his love of power. Sukuna loves restraints in any form, not him, though. He will for sure try and fist you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere. Sukuna will fuck you where ever the fuck he wants too with no shame. He’ll fuck you on his bed, ruin the luxurious sheets and break the bedframe over and over. It’s gotten to the point where he actually got rid of it all together because he was sick of the wood splintering and nearly hurting you. Sukuna can and will fuck you on a raised platform in front of his petrified subjects. He wants everyone to know who you belong too – even if you don’t need to be fucked stupid in front of hundreds of people for them to know. It’s quite obvious. To be totally honest, Sukuna loves the mess and mayhem of fucking you in the tub. Watching the water slosh everywhere then ordering a maid to come clean up the damage, it makes him laugh.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

There is an innocence to you that really gets Sukuna going. You’ve done the most downright filthy things with him, you’ve stood beside him as he makes a bloody mess of someone… but somehow you still retain this sort of innocence to you that he loves to try and taint. It’s not to say you’re oblivious… you’re very smart in Sukuna’s eyes and he knows you have a mean streak. But when you’re with him… there is something about you that he wants to break so badly and he has such fun trying to do so… you’re resilient which would usually piss him off to no end… but with you it’s endearing and he can’t figure out why he can’t get enough (you’re in love dumb ass)

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Shit. Yeah no that’s the one thing he can not and will not deal with. He’s had his fair share of bodily fluids – to say the least without going into detail. But he draws the line at anything to do with vomit or scat. It disturbs him… which is saying a lot. He’s had women offered to him as sacrifice that have done several things in fear and he can say he truthfully cannot handle it. Also, no threesomes ever. He’s not sharing you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He’s a healthy combination of both (shocking). Sukuna loves watching you struggle to even take one of his cocks in your mouth nevermind both. But your mouth feels so damn good even though you struggle to get more than the tip past your lips. Sukuna loves to go down on you though, keeping your thighs spread apart so he can eat you as he pleases. Your arousal just tastes so good to him, he can’t get enough and he will not stop until he’s satisfied.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Rough and cruel for the most part. But he can be even meaner when he goes unbearably slow, splitting you open agonizingly with two cocks opposed to one just to see those pretty tears slip down your cheeks as you beg and plead for mercy (mercy he never gives). Sukuna will fuck you stupid with one cock most of the time, that’s his little bit of kindness towards you, but you’ll get fucked twice at least… ya know… gotta get the second cock off too. He’ll give you a choice, get fucked twice with one cock each time or get fucked once with two… mind you it’s never just once even if it’s two cocks at the same time or one each. You’re smart enough to take one cock multiple times unless you want to be bedridden because you can’t walk. Both options have happened to you many times though… so you really can’t tell why he offers you a choice.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Sex can take up a whole day when it comes to Sukuna. So, no, he despises quickies. He doesn’t like to be rushed, he doesn’t care if he gets caught, he’ll make people watch. What is there that would really appeal to him??? It seems more annoying than anything really.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He will experiment but only on his own accord. He won’t say it outright but Sukuna is at least a bit mindful of the experiments he does… he doesn’t want to really hurt you or scare you away. So he picks and chooses what he wants to try on you. If there is something very intriguing to him that he worries will make you uncomfortable? He’ll force two other people to play it out while he watches and decides from there… he’s oddly considerate of you in that sense.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

As you saw above… sex can be an all-day process for Sukuna. He can last as long as he wants to… and I mean that seriously. His stamina is infinite, nothing will stop him but himself. He can go multiple rounds until you’re so fucked out you’ve lost count. He can last anywhere from 15-25 minutes per round, he could last much longer but his goal is inevitably to cum so why bother… praying for you honestly.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Toys like we know today don’t exist within his era (the Heian period) and honestly?? Sukuna is a fucking jungle gym in his own right so you really don’t need toys… and even if they did exist and were at his disposal? Sukuna isn’t using them. Why the hell would he rely on a stupid little toy to get you off when he’s more than capable?? He’s not intimidated by them, he just would think they’re absolutely useless… modern day though… if you begged him for a vibrator he would probably cave and get you one. He may even find amusement in it.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Sukuna and fair do not belong in the same sentence so it should shock nobody that this man will tease you until you are nearly dry heaving with how hard you’re crying. He will tease you for hours, to the point it feels like genuine torture, before he feels like getting you off. Then, the unfair attitude continues because he will not stop even when you start begging him to. He likes how quickly he can make you regret your words, seeing those pretty fat globs of tears leaking down your cheeks only makes the experience better for him.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Sukuna will curse and groan but that’s about it. He won’t try and hide his noises, either, but he will try and make sure he’s not too loud. It’s rare to get a moan, whine, or whimper out of him. Especially since he has such good control over himself. But he will not hesitate to groan about how good his cock is feeling because of you… he has to give you a little something to get you to stick around, ya know? Not that you have a choice… and not that you’d really want to leave him anyways… giving up your luxurious lifestyle and being on the king of curses’ good side isn’t something just anyone can obtain, you know.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Sukuna hates your family, ever since you were dropped off to him to be a sacrifice. He doesn’t care about his donors and their sacrifices since all of them are mediocre pieces of shit at best. Though he knows a scumbag like him is not one to talk. But you? You arrived to him nearly beaten to death, half naked, with little to no emotion left in you. What the hell was he supposed to do with that? Where was the fun in playing with something that was already half dead. Though, as he was about to kill you, something in your expression moved his icy heart. That truly petrified him but he’d never let anyone know it. He kept you instead of killing you, ordering for the immediate execution of your rotten family instead. He likes to joke that he had the perfect specimen nursed back to health, in his eyes you really were perfect.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Sukuna is a tall man… while we don’t know his exact height in true form… he’s been guesstimated to be anywhere from 7.5 feet to 9.8 feet. A tall man is going to have a monstrous cock… or cocks in his case. When he’s soft he’s about 8.5 inches in length, and when he’s hard he’s just over 11 inches. He’s monstrous, girthy and sticks straight out… both of them do. He will hurt… he will make you feel like you’re getting ripped in half and he will often try and fist you to prepare you for him. He cannot fit all the way inside of you, as much as he’d love to, he's not trying to kill you by rupturing your organs. He’s a tan color, one dick is circumcised, the other is not… he was feeling quirky, and has a deep rosy pink tip… or tips… you know what I mean.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Sukuna has to fuck you at least twice a day, if he doesn’t, he’s extremely irritable. He has at least 5 hours of his day set aside just for you. But really he makes his own schedule so he can do whatever the fuck he wants when he wants to. His sex drive is pretty damn high and he does absolutely nothing to deal with it or hold off. He will get off the moment he wants too.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Sukuna prefers falling asleep after you do, which can be pretty instant considering how long he may have been fucking you. So the answer is anywhere between 30 seconds and 10 minutes.

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eustasskidagenda · 6 months

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anon asked: Hi! I just read your Kid, Zoro, Law & Sanji hc with a s/o afraid of having sex and I just loved it! Your writing is amazing and I really enjoyed it. I struggle with vaginismus so I pretty much know how stressful this situation could be. But I’m actually curious to request you the same hc but with much BIGGER boys, especially Doflamingo, Crocodile and Katakuri. Please feel free to add other big men bc I honestly can’t get enough of them.😭😭😭

Hi hi! So I feel really dumb because I accidentally deleted the request, but luckily, I had copied/pasted the text of my doc before. But sorry, anon D: Anyway, thank you so much for liking my work and for requesting! That was pretty fun to write. I decided to add King and the sweet Corazon. And before starting, please have a look at this, lol. Those guys are so BIG, help.

☆Doflamingo, Crocodile, Katakuri, King & Corazon with a s/o afraid of having sex

CW (generals) : smut, MDNI, v!sex, f!reader, oral sex (reader receiving), fingering (reader receiving), size kink

WC : Oh my God, I got carried away... 4,3k. Enjoy. :D

⇢ You can read the part one here & the part three here

Doflamingo

CW : a lot of teasing, creative use of devil fruit, slight praise, slight dirty talk, unprotected sex, pet name

Doflamingo is, let's say, complicated. Of course, he considers you as a part of the Donquixote family, and he cares deeply about his close ones. But, on the flip side, he can't help but love when people are stressed or afraid because of him. It plays with his constant need for dominance. So first, he would grin, almost laugh, and be extremely pleased with himself. "My poor little bird is afraid… because of my size?" While running his fingers along the length of his cock through his pants. "I'll make it good for you, don't worry, just leave it to me."

Doflamingo craves dominance, so he would be more than satisfied with this situation, his eyes roaming over your body with eagerness. He's a really patient man and also loves to play and tease you all the time. "Lay down comfortably on the bed." He would say, placing his heavy, large hands on either side of your hips, slowly pushing you down on the mattress, his eyes shining with nothing but pure desire.

He loves how tiny your body looks when he's towering over you. It makes you look so vulnerable. Oh, sure, he loves when his s/o is smaller than him. Again, it plays with his constant need of domination. He finds it fascinating that he could destroy you with one hand. Luckily, you're his precious bird, so he would probably play with you and inflict some pain on you, but only what you're able and willing to take.

His hands would be surprisingly feather-light while running all over your body, tracing all of your curves, and fondling your breasts. Then, pinching your nipples, rolling them between his thumb and index, delighted by all of your shivering and sighs.

"Mh, you're so needy, y/n" with a low, teasing laugh as he slowly runs his fingers down your trembling thighs, tracing along the sensitive skin before slowly, really slowly reaching for your wet folds. He would smile, his eyes fixed on your pussy, fascinated by how needy you are already for him. But that's not enough. He is eager for more. "So pretty"

He would begin to tease you mercilessly, tracing soft patterns on your inner thighs and lower-belly. He likes to play with anticipation. He's not the kind of man who just roughly and mechanically slides his fingers inside you. Without teasing, there's no fun.

The more you squirm and moan, the more he's pleased, watching your pussy becoming more and more wet.

"So eager already." Purring close to your ears, making you shiver even more, leaving a trail of goosebumps along your spine. "What should I do now? What do you want y/n, my tongue or my fingers?"

You'll have both in the end, so don't worry.

It's clear that Doflamingo has mastered using his long tongue. And the same applies to his fingers always fidgeting when he uses his devil fruit. He's probably a master when it comes to fingering and oral sex. So he would slowly sink between your thighs, licking your soft skin before finally allowing you to feel his tongue against your sensitive folds, keeping your thighs open enough for him with his heavy hands.

You just can't help but arch your back as he eats you out, turning you into a whining and moaning mess. He would drink your juice as if it was a precious wine. "That's it", humming against your slit, licking your clit. Slowly, he would slide a thick finger inside of you. His mind would probably be a bit dizzy, thinking about how good he would feel with his cock inside of your tightness.

"You're so responsive, little bird," before adding another finger and hitting that sweet spot, still licking your clit.

And he won't stop until you cum all over his tongue and fingers. "Good girl"

With eyes darkened with desire, he would finally removing his pants, his heavy and extremely long cock springing free, leaking in pre-cum and twitching in anticipation. You can't help but look at his length, stressed. "Do you like looking at my big cock, little bird? Does it turn you on to know that I'm going to fuck you senseless?" So sure, he would grin again before lying on his back and letting you ride him.

He perfectly knows how to control himself so he won't just push roughly while you line your pussy with his cockhead, trying to brace yourself-up. You definitely want to do it, but you feel nervous. "Need some help, little bird?"

As you nod, he would use his devil fruit to guide you. With one broad hand wrapping around your waist and the other guiding the strings, he would slowly force your hips to move down, impaling you on his breathtaking thickness, his eyes sparkled with mischief. That's the moment you would see him lose his grin as he can't handle how tight and wet you feel all around him. "So tight…"

"You can take more?" As long as you tell him to keep going, he would continue to guide your hips down his length, groaning softly, with his hand fondling the flesh of your waist. "That's it, take it, take it all."

As you start to moan, he would say "What's up little bird, you love how well I am stretching you?"

And as you slowly get used to his cock stretching your walls, his cock throbbing inside you, Doflamingo would nicely use his strings to guide you moving up and down, delighted by the sloshing noises. The way your core swallows his length would be mind-blowing for him. The sight of your wetness covering his cock every time you move up and down is something he would love to see more often. Be prepared to entertain your king again.

Crocodile

CW : slight domination kink, praises, he's smoking because well it's Crocodile, oral sex (Crocodile receiving), slight hair pulling, using of his hook in a slight creative way but nothing extreme, belly bulge, unprotected sex

Another DILF and dominant man.

Crocodile is a silent man. So the second you tell him you're nervous because it's been a while since the last time you had sex and that you're also nervous because he's both long and thick, he would just raise an eyebrow. Just like Doflamingo, he would love the feeling of you being intimidated, because Crocodile definitely has a thing (and a kink) for dominance. He likes when you acknowledge his rank and qualities.

"You're afraid because of my size?"

He would lead your hand until you reached his cock. "If you're nervous, then you have to become familiar with it." So he would feel the girth and the veins, breathing deeply, delighted by the sight of your small hands trying to correctly wrap his thickness. "That's it, y/n. Touch it and get used to it. Soon, it will be all within you."

He would talk with his usual deep, raspy, and calm voice, the one that always sends shivers down your spine. And sure, he would act all dominant, smoking his cigar while you try so hard to satisfy him. Of course, he would look down at you. You are in his hands. So let go of all your intrusive thoughts and just focus on him. Only him.

"Suck it."

He would watch closely as you try to wrap your tongue around his cock, tracing all the veins, and licking hungrily all the pre-cum leaking from his cockhead. He would grab a hand from your hair with his heavy and broad hand, leading your head back and forth, while watching you drool and struggle to breathe all over his cock. He would slowly lose his composure, sighing huskily, unable to handle how cute you look with your mouth full of his cock, trying to figure out how to take more of his length. He would find the sight of his member glistening with your saliva to be quite entertaining.

"That's a good girl. Come get your rewards."

The moment he blows out his cigar and removes his rings, you know the real deal is about to start.

He would likely use his large hook, carefully running the sharpened tip along the soft skin of your stomach. Before slowly leaving a trail of kisses along your neck. Avoid running your hands through his hair and stay still like the good girl you are. Otherwise, he might punish you with a hard pinch on your nipple and a rough slap on your ass cheeks.

Slowly but surely, then, he would reach your inner thighs and then your pussy. He would eat you out with his hand holding your thighs apart. He would you lick your pussy in a classy way, not like a vulgar starving. He would be fond of all your moaning and incoherent mumbling as you can't handle how good it feels. "You won't cum until I say so." While circling your clit with his thumb, teasing you, drinking your juice. Your shivering and tremblings are both entertaining and satisfying. Crocodile rarely goes down on someone, but when he does… oh, it's quite mesmerizing.

"Stay still" if you start to squirm because of how good it feels.

And, once you're finally reduced to a whining mess, he would use his hook to grab one of your thighs, pushing them apart, spreading your legs wide enough to fit in between. "Spread your legs for me." He would put a pillow under your back while manhandling you. And then, again, he would use his hook to slightly raise your upper body, until your pussy is lined with his cock.

"Can you take it?"

He would enter you in one go as soon as you nodded. Not in a forceful way, but he doesn't see the point of taking a lot of breaks. Once his cock is buried deep inside you, he will soothe your trembling thighs by running his hand along your lower-stomach, feeling the bulge created by his cock. "Good girl. You're taking me so well." He would likely hold your legs tightly, trying to fight his own desire to fuck you roughly.

He's a patient man, so he'll wait until you're ready for him to start thrusting.

So deep and slow at the same time while he stretches you further, his cock throbbing and twitching. Not a grunter, but a pretty deep breath as you tighten around him. For this occasion, he will spare you from his usual roughness. But next time… you better be ready.

Katakuri

CW : The reader is smaller than him, but there's not a BIG size difference, food play, unprotected sex

"I know, love." Yes, he would speak before you even have time to express your fears. Blame it on his haki. Katakuri has a lot of sisters, so he would be well-aware of those kinds of thoughts. If you're nervous, he would take some time to ask why, making sure to fully understand the situation.

"I'll take care of you, everything will be alright." Despite his lack of words, you have faith in him. He's aware of the future, so if he says it's going to be fine, you can trust him and it's already really soothing.

The Sweet Commander is a gentleman and he's aware of size. He would never just slam into you, especially not if you're already afraid. Before even thinking of reaching for your pussy, he would start with a lot of soft kisses all along your neck, and then on your breasts, sucking on your nipples, pinching them nicely. He just loves your breasts. They feel soft under his palms. He could spend hours worshipping your chest. As you slowly arch your back, moaning softly, and relaxing under his touch, he would continue to kiss your stomach, honoring every inch of your body.

You're so beautiful. Despite his quietness, his eyes would be brimming with pride. Being intimate with such a beautiful woman like you fills him with pride. "You're doing great."

His voice would always be calm and deep, as usual. The control he has over himself is quite mesmerizing.

And well, Katakuri probably has a food play kink, so he would love to devour your body covered in cream. So intoxicating. Your body tastes amazing. The taste of sugar is also amazing. Both? Total heaven.

He would then sink his head between your thighs, eating you out like your pussy was one of his dearest donuts. He'd like nothing more than to please you, so feel free to guide him. Katakuri being both smart and observant, he would quickly learn all of your sweet spots, turning you into a whiny moan, begging for more.

If you don't tell him to stop, he could eat you out for hours. He can't help it; it feels so good and you taste so good. He would drink your juice, circling your clit with his thumb and wouldn't stop until you cum against his lips.

"So good."

He would take advantage of your wetness and dizzy mind from your orgasm to slowly push one thick and long finger inside you. It's so tight and warm that he would struggle to keep his calm composure. Especially because his haki showed him some really nice pictures of what's going to happen.

As long as you need him to continue, Katakuri would honestly just pamper you with kisses and caresses. He knows how big he's, so you have to tell him when you're ready to take him.

Katakuri would keep your thighs apart with an impatient hand, exposing your wet folds to his eyes. He would look hungrily. His cock twitching crazily in impatience, leaking in anticipation. "You're ready?"

He already knows the answer, but Katakuri is a gentleman and cares a lot about consent. It doesn't matter if his observation haki shows him everything in advance.

Katakuri would intertwine his fingers with yours before slowly easing his cock into you in one go. A slow, but steady one. And as he fills you up to the brim, he would lose his composure and sigh in relief. Your pussy feels like heaven around his cock. It's a perfect blend of tightness, warmth, heat, and wetness. "Y/N, you feel amazing."

He would adjust his pace to what you're capable of. If you need him to slow down, he will. And he would be more than happy to comply if you asked him to be rougher. He is here to satisfy you. And you will be satisfied. Reduced to a shivering, moaning mess. The way his fat cock slowly slides in and out and hits all your sweet spots is just too good. It's such a delight to see the big, stoic Katakuri looking his composure because of your body…

King

CW : The reader is smaller than him, but there's not a BIG size difference, kind of blindfold kink I guess (?), slight spanking, unprotected sex

Even with you, King doesn't like to show his face. He struggles with intimacy. Your confession would make him feel embarrassed. What is he supposed to do? He was about to fuck you without any further thought, but now he needs to take more consideration.

He would slap your thigh with a sigh. "Turn around."

While slowly lying on your stomach and complying, he would slowly remove his heavy mask, running a hand through his beautiful white hair. But you don't have the right to watch. The only thing you're allowed to do is imagine. You've already seen his face. So you close your eyes and imagine his beautiful, almost mesmerizing beauty in your mind: brown skin, white hair, and an expression that is both cold and determined.

He would make you feel. Feel his mouth licking and kissing your spine, leaving a trail of goosebumps. Wet kisses. His hair would softly caress your skin as he devoured the back of your neck, his big hands roaming along your waist to keep you steady. "Stay still" he would always speak with his lips near your ear, enjoying all of your shivering.

And suddenly, he would yank your panties or just push them asides, eating you out from behind, spreading your thighs. "Get on your all fours," he would command, just to have a better view of your glistening folds, before sinking back between your legs. He would keep your cheeks spread and lap at your pussy, intoxicated by your moans, your taste, smell, and how you feel against his lips. You're arched for him, exposed, so beautiful.

Even if he eats you out, he would love to spank your ass every time you squirm, forcing you to stay still. "Don't move and let me eat you out." He can sense that you're tense. And he doesn't understand why because usually, he can slide into you with ease. But he would take his time, fingering you, rubbing your clit, turning you into an almost crying, whimpering mess.

He would obligingly ignore his cock, twitching and throbbing in anticipation, taking his time to work on your tightness, stroking your back. "Shh, it's alright, we'll take our time."

He would love to watch how beautiful you are, with your ass up and chest against the mattress, and your head buried in a pillow. What a stunning sight. The way your pussy is messing up on the bedsheets is quite stunning.

He would use the fact you're unable to see him to his advantage, teasing you, running his fingers along your slit, then rubbing his cockhead, mixing his pre-cum with your wetness. "Please…"

Please keep begging, it's a lullaby to his ears.

And finally, he would grab your hips firmly, filling you up to the hilt in one go, hitting your cervix. He would fight against his own desire to destroy you by digging into your soft flesh with his fingers. His strong grip would leave bruises on your skin tomorrow.

With his huge cock nestled deep inside you, almost splitting you in half, he would let out a shaky breath. So good. So intoxicating. As you lie down, at his mercy, the sight of his cock slowly thrusting in and out of your tight hole, all stretched out around his thickness... it's too much to handle. As he plows into you from behind, he would moan. His member, all glistening and shining, covered in your wetness, the way your ass is swallowing him...

He just can't.

His hands would be glued to your ass cheeks all the time. "You keep sucking me in, it won't let me go."

He would try his best to stay nice. Stretching you out slowly. Even with slow strokes, his size is so overwhelming that it drives you crazy. Holding onto the bedsheets, closing your eyes, all you're allowed to do is imagine his jaw tightly clenched and his muscular body looming over you.

"Does it feel good, Y/N?"

The instant you say yes and he feels you loose around his thickness, he will smash into you roughly, grunting loudly, slapping your ass, intoxicated by your you. And you alone.

Corazon

CW : Body worship, praises, face sitting, protected sex, wholesome, soft sex

To end on a sweet note, the lovely Rosinante.

Let's assume it's your first time ending up in the same bed. Rosinante is always kind to you, and you know he won't do anything to hurt you. But still, if you explain to him you're nervous because he's big and also because you're always a bit stressed when it comes to sex… then, Rosinante would just be even more sweet.

"Sweetie, we'll take it slow. You trust me?"

He would be both careful and nervous due to his goofiness. What if he just falls on you? What if he crushes you with his weight? What if... oh, no, he's thinking too much again, his hands twitching on your body.

"It's okay Rosi, I trust you."

As you ease him down, he would kiss every nook and cranny of your body: neck, collarbone, breasts, stomach, belly button,... leaving red lipstick streaks all over.

His large, heavy, and yet kind hands would hungrily roam your figure, your shoulders, learning each of your curves, scars, and every single part that makes you, you. He would make you love everything you hate about yourself, making you feel safe and loved.

His hands would be soft and heavenly as he fondled your breasts, mesmerized by how warm and soft they felt against his big palms. Well, he's still goofy, so he might accidentally pinch you or scratch your nipple, apologizing again and again with wet puppy eyes.

And slowly, his hands and mouth would continue to explore your skin, kissing your lower stomach, and slowly reaching for your damping wet panties. "So wet for me."

He's genuinely amazed. Rosinante would be in awe: does he attract you so much? He just wants to smile warmly at you.

He would accidentally rip your panties apart, and then apologizes again. Please, just laugh or reassure him. After all, his goofiness is adorable.

He would be incredibly sweet if you're a bit nervous about exposing yourself fully to him. "Sweetie, I swear you're mesmerizing. So perfect and beautiful, I want to love every inch of your skin". While slowly running his hands along your inner thighs. "It's alright, sweetie. Just open your legs for me. Can you do this for me?"

If you're still nervous, then Rosinante would lie down and allow you to sit on his face with your wet pussy pressed against his lips. Rosinante would love to eat you out while rubbing his hands along your back, ass, and thighs. Soft kisses on your clit, hungry tongue drinking your juice while it flows down on his chin.

He would gently massage your bottom while slowly sucking on your clit and swirling his tongue. Rosinante would just love to have your thighs squeezing his cheeks. Move, all you want against his tongue, all he wants is to satisfy you and soothe all of your worries. His focus will only be on you, regardless of how hard his cock is.

He would slowly slide a thick finger inside you, curling it nicely to hit that sweet spot, making sure you're ready and aware of what's happening. The way you moan his name and use his mouth as you please is mesmerizing.

With two fingers gently stretching out, Rosinante would continue to worship your body with his hands and tongue. He's probably trying to hide his coughs because he's suffocating with his face stuck between your thighs. But who cares. The way you taste is like heaven.

If you want to cum, he would allow you to cum against his lips. If you want to stop before reaching ecstasy, that's okay too.

"I'm ready for you, Rosi."

Totally flushed and nervous, Rosi would let you ride him. He's too stressed by his goofiness, so it's better if you take the lead. And at least, you can control the rhythm and depth.

Rosinante would definitely use a condom. But, he would struggle to open the packaging and then roll the protection over his length due to his nervousness, excitement, and goofiness. His big, shaking hands would likely cause him to split one or two condoms. Please, help this poor boy.

The shows continue with the lube. It's likely that he would let the bottle to fall, spilling all of the liquid onto both your belly and his hands. "I'm so sorry, sweetie!" And he would stupidly try to steal some lube from your stomach to smear it over his length. You can't help but laugh warmly, caressing his hair. "It's okay Rosi, relax."

His heart melts as you straddle him, his length twitching and leaking wildly. He's big, both in length and girth, and he's aware of it. He would allow you to take all of your time to prepare yourself. The way he looks at you tells how much he cares about you and how honored he feels to have you by his side.

"Whenever you want, Y/N" with his deep, soothing and soft voice.

As he feels your tight entrance against his cockhead, he would bite his lips, grabbing the bedsheets tightly. Because he would never dare hold you roughly and leave bruises on your body. When he sees that you're still a bit nervous, he would sit up while you're still straddling him. He would slowly raise your hips before easing his cock inside you. Pushing gently, each inch, slowly yet steadily. "Shh, it's okay, I've got you, you're taking me so well. You're so perfect for me."

He would hold you tightly as you sit down on his lap, your breasts pressed against his chest. "It's okay sweetie, you're doing great, it's okay, almost there, just a little more, you feel so good around me." With his hands squeezing your hips to keep you still.

His entire body would be shaking. The sensations are overwhelming for both of you. You're so tight, so wet, and his huge cock is stretching you so nicely, throbbing inside you.

He would soothe your back gently as he finally penetrates you fully, his large size stretching you out even further. "There it's over. Look at you, taking all of my cock so well. You're such a brave girl. "

He would slowly guide your hips up and down, unable to handle how good it feels. " I've got you, let me take care of you."

A lot of kisses, soft, heavenly touches, his breath deep against your breath as he continues to slide gently yet firmly inside you. He would praise you all the time, worshiping your body. A bit goofy from time to time, loweering you to roughly down his cock, scratching you or biting your lips instead of kissing you softly.

But a really, really sweet moment, and a lot of cuddles during the aftercare.

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cevansbrat0007 · 1 year

Note

*clears throat* Ahem, if I may ask Mr. Andy Barber what are his favorite parts of his Baby Girl's body and personality? How does Mr. Sexy Daddy like to best worship his woman? If that's not too forward to ask of course, Sir.

Summary: Andrew Barber answers your burning questions about his feelings for his wife. Written from Andy's POV.

Warning: the following response contains mature themes, including references to sex, D/s lifestyles, pregnancy, ex-spouses, pregnancy, cursing, and more. Minors DNI.

A/N: For more insight into Andrew Barber and his Baby Girl, please check out my ongoing Growing Pains Series. All mistakes are my own. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated. ___

I ran this by Baby Girl last night and received approval to answer these questions however I see fit. The only caveats to this being that I have to answer honestly, and then allow her to read them once I’ve finished. Both of which are fine with me.

My sweet brat knows how much I love and adore her. And if she claims she doesn’t, she’s either lying or I simply haven’t been doing my job. Either way, please rest assured that I will seek to rectify that particular issue as soon as possible. And I will leave it to her to share the details of our reckoning with the rest of you.

Now, back to your first question regarding my favorite physical features of hers. Of course, the short answer is everything. I love all of her. But I also know that that’s not the answer you’re looking for, is it?

I suspected as much. As my woman can attest, I can be pretty quick on the draw when I put my mind to it. And that’s not some kind of backhanded euphemism about my sexual prowess. I’m a man who is incredibly confident in his abilities. I know how to satisfy my woman. Because I’m a good listener – and I know how to take direction.

But I digress. If I had to pick a favorite body part or feature, I think it would have to be her nose. My Baby Girl has the most adorable nose. I love the way it crinkles up when I say something ridiculous or when our girls make her laugh. And her laugh is…it’s just the best. She has so many. You don’t always know which one you’re going to get.

Is it going to be a sweet, demure giggle or a loud, slightly irreverent cackle? Both are fantastic, highly satisfying sounds in my opinion. Because regardless of whatever one I receive, I know without a doubt that she’s being her most authentic self with me. And, quite honestly, what more could I ask for?

I would also be remiss if I didn’t mention my wife’s stomach. I absolutely adore her belly, especially now that it’s swelling again with my babies. She’s worried about stretch marks, which isn’t a particularly unique concern or anything, but all I see is the beauty. Don’t get me wrong – my woman is a knockout. And I have no doubt that my two little girls, Bianca and Katrina, will follow in her footsteps.

Granted, I’d much rather have them look like her than me. But as a father, it also doesn’t mean I have to be particularly happy about it.

But during her pregnancies, Baby Girl is just damn near impossible for me to resist. Watching her body change and swell so that it can protect and accommodate the tiny lives we’ve created together…it just does things to me. She likes to claim that I tend to act a little feral when she’s expecting. She’s certainly not wrong.

And last, but certainly not least, I’d have to say that I’m a big fan of her derriere. It’s just so goddamned spankable. And biteable. And squeezable. That ass is doing the Lord’s work and for that, I couldn’t be more grateful.

As for my ladies personality, there are so many qualities she possesses that I find attractive. I honestly can’t get enough of her. But the most important quality, the one aspect that I hold the highest above everything else, is that she is an amazing mother.

She is the living embodiment of patience. And not just with our little ones, but with me as well. Baby Girl may doubt herself sometimes, but she is so sweet and caring. And best of all, it’s genuine. You can see it all, right there in her eyes.

My wife’s eyes are the window to her soul. That’s not just some throw away line, either. It’s part of the reason she can’t ever really keep shit from me regarding how she’s feeling. Those big, beautiful eyes somehow manage to betray her every time.

Quite honestly, I could go on and on about that woman. Spend hours praising her charm and her wit, her talent and creativity. Because she is my everything. The source of my strength. The mother of my children. My partner in crime.

But at the end of it all, my absolute most favorite thing about this woman is that she’s mine. And what’s more, I plan on fucking keeping her.

On to your next question. My favorite way to worship my woman, long before she ever became my wife, is to anticipate her needs. I wasn’t very good at this with my ex, but now I’m much better at it. Over the years, she’s shown me how to listen – not just to her words, but to her body as well.

Our relationship, at least in part, revolves around a particular dynamic. We don’t often talk about it with other people because, frankly, it’s nobody’s goddamn business but our own. But it works for us. And if it ain’t broke…

Well, I’m sure you take my meaning.

With my wife, my favorite way to worship her is by doing the little things – which also promotes intimacy. This involves making time for each other, which can sometimes be challenging with two kids in the mix. But as her Daddy, I make it a priority.

Whether it’s rubbing her feet while she catches me up on her day, or helping her apply her lotion after our shower (I’m big on conserving water), I try to make myself available. Grand gestures are wonderful, and they certainly have their place, but watching my woman melt over small acts that demonstrate the ways I’m constantly thinking of her…

Those moments right there are priceless.

But my favorite thing to do with her, which is actually something I’ve slowly begun to pride myself in, is helping with her hair. My wife has been blessed with a head full of thick, glossy curls. And little by little, she’s taught me how to care for it. I’m not a professional by any means, but there’s also nothing like hearing her sigh in bliss as I take my time oiling and massaging her scalp. Plus the products she uses smell amazing.

I’m even getting pretty good at doing my two daughters’ hair as well. In fact, it just so happens that pigtails are my speciality.

Well, that’s all I have for now. Hopefully what I’ve shared above will appease your curiosity. At least temporarily. Thank you for being so polite and respectful with your question. And if you find yourself with more, please feel free to pass them along.

Sincerely, Andrew S. Barber P.S. You didn’t ask this, but since the thought occurred to me, I figured I’d share. My favorite thing to see my wife wearing is absolutely nothing – save for her wedding ring. Although, there’s also this thing we do that involves a pair of heels that is probably a close second.

Not that I ever need an excuse to get on my knees for her. Guess you could say I was born with a bit of a sweet tooth.

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oldfashionedmorphine · 9 months

Text

hi friends!! i’m super excited to share Will’s perspective from the scene in the basement all the way back in chapter 4 of i’m a wreck (without you here)!!!

i highly recommend reading chapter 17 first!!! 😉

(it’s 2.7k words! oh and psa for anyone who has read my story so far—especially if you haven’t read this chapter in a while: i have gone back and fixed some things i didn’t like cause as much as i loved this chapter, i published it before i was 100% satisfied with it…but it works better now! also idk why but i kinda like Will’s pov more 👀)

🎵🎶 and look!! i even picked out songs!!! :D

tagging my fans: @across-thestars @boahey @magentamee @daydreams-in-the-moonlight @greenfiend @rebellius @booksandpaperss @castelobyers @total-serene560 @wheelersboy @sparks-olivarpente @hazmatazz @suzieburself @unrepentant-byler-shipper @quarter-pasteleven

Enjoy!

Cause It’s the Only Thing I Wanna Do

June 22, 2004 11:47 pm

“—I really wanna know how you’ve actually been, you know, from you.”

“Well, uh...” Mike starts to say, but then he pauses, eyebrows lifting, eyes wide—it looked as though he were trying to figure out where to start first. And then Will watches Mike pour himself another shot, slamming it down fast, and sucking his teeth before he continues, “Well...I live in an apartment, it’s not terrible. Rent is a little expensive where I’m at, so I have a roommate—he’s a law student and I rarely ever see him—but anyway, I had a lot of financial mishaps over the years, so I never quite got out of the cycle of renting to own anything...or heck, even live alone. But it doesn’t really bother me though—I have a cat, her name’s Josephine—that was her name at the shelter and I thought it was cute so I kept it—and uh...definitely no girlfriend…”

Definitely no girlfriend?

The way he had said it raised a tiny little flag in Will’s mind. And then there was a pause between Mike’s words—Will almost found the nerve to ask him to elaborate, but then Mike shakes his head slightly and he’s back to speaking, “And the weather is pretty dreary. Both Nancy and Holly were convinced I have depression. They’re probably right. They said the weather only makes it worse. It does get lonely sometimes too—my relationships—well, nothing ever sticks. Honestly, it's mostly sucked, but I can’t bring myself to leave.”

Will pulls his knees to his chest, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting to hear, but hearing Mike talk about feeling lonely and how his sisters were convinced he had depression didn’t sit well with him. Once upon a time, back during the darker days of being so incredibly furious because Mike had left him behind, there were times when Will had hoped he was miserable, but eventually he grew out of that mindset after his heart hurt less, and over the past couple years, whenever he thought of Mike, he liked to imagine he was happy somehow, even if it was without him. And all the things he knew from afar—the things Nancy had told him—were all positive because she had never once mentioned anything about depression, she only informed him of the highlights. Simple stuff like Mike getting a new job or how he had sent gifts for the kids, and he knew about the cat, just not her name, but of course each time Nancy would also add a little something to the effect of ‘You know, I think he misses you, you should try talking to him—I have his number if you want it’, but of course, he couldn’t do it. He wanted to call, but too much time had passed…and it wasn’t like Mike ever tried to reach out either—Nancy had his number too, so she probably offered it to Mike at some point as well. Ultimately, it felt like the damage was too severe to ever recover from. And it was also very hard to believe that Nancy was really telling the truth—that Mike actually missed him—and not just meddling to make family gatherings less awkward. Maybe she had hoped that if the two of them were friends again, then her brother would be more inclined to visit. Perhaps a selfish motive, but if that was the truth, then he could understand why she would try and make the effort. In the end, Will thought it was best to leave it alone, because there would be less chance of getting hurt again that way…

And when Will realizes Mike had left him a short window to speak, he takes it—he wants Mike to know he's listening. “Why not? If it sucks, why not move somewhere else? What’s stopping you? It’s not like you haven’t done a big move before. Just go somewhere more affordable,” but Mike’s face was still sour, so Will makes a small attempt to provoke a smile with a teasing tone, “and with better weather.”

“I dunno. It’s stupid when I think about it now, but I pissed everyone off back when I first moved—and then you wouldn’t talk to me anymore—I guess I just felt like it all had to mean something.”

Will quirks an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

Mike keeps his eyes cast down at his hands, fidgeting with an empty shot glass. “I mean, that me living there, in Seattle, couldn’t be all for nothing. And I only realize now that I was being so fucking stubborn about it. It’s just that...half the time—half the time I was embarrassed that I didn’t live up to my parents expectations. I could have been more—or something. Something more. I had really hoped being somewhere else would have helped, like when people talk about a ‘fresh start’, but I just feel like—I dunno, like I’m going through the motions.” He scoffs. “I can’t believe I’m saying this but...if twelve year old me could see me now I’m sure he’d be pretty disappointed. I let myself get knocked down because of a couple dumbass choices—any normal person would have dusted themselves off and tried again. But not me.”

“Oh…” Will murmurs. He wasn’t sure what else to say.

“Not me...or I dunno, maybe I was just punishing myself.”

Again he watches Mike pour himself another shot of vodka, filling it to the very brim this time, almost to the point it spills over, and as he brings the shot to his mouth, some of the liquor drips onto his shirt and the floor. It was clear Mike’s coordination was wavering with each additional shot. And then Mike offers to pour Will another, but he shakes his head, refusing—Will knew his limits. Three shots of vodka was more than enough, possibly too much, because he was definitely feeling it. If he drank any more he’d regret it in the morning. Not to mention he wasn’t a big fan of getting drunk to begin with. He always feared he’d end up like his deadbeat dad if he wasn’t careful about pacing himself when it came to alcohol.

Mike sets the bottle back on the coffee table. “You probably know this, but I was also holding a major…major grudge against my dad for the longest fucking time because of his—well, cause of all those things he said.” He chuckles, which Will found to be a bit unsettling considering what Mike was saying. “At one point my mom even said that he was ‘sorry for everything’ and that he wanted to try to ‘make amends’…part of me thought she was just saying it to force me to apologize first, but I still couldn’t face him even if it was the damn truth. Like, I just couldn’t trust that he really felt differently after everything—well ‘cause, all those horrible things he said—the things he implied…even about you, they might as well have been…about me. Y’know? I mean, they were…they are, he just didn’t know it. And I really didn’t think he’d still be sorry if he knew about that.”

Wait—what? Did he just—

Will was stunned, though he wasn’t sure he heard him right. Because it wasn’t like he had said the words outright, yet it sounded a hell of a lot like he was implying that—

And now Mike was looking over at him, full of panic, with the kind of expression you’d expect from someone who just revealed a truth they never meant to share. His eyes remain locked on Mike, but the longer he stares at him the more confused it makes him, so Will drops his gaze to the floor and tightens his arms around his legs. No matter how Mike’s face seemed, it wasn’t confirmation of what he thought he heard—hopes he heard.

Out of the corner of his eye, Will sees Mike reaching for the vodka again, this time drinking straight from the bottle. Part of him wanted to snatch the bottle away from Mike—I think you’ve had enough, mister, you’ll regret another drop—except he can’t seem to move a damn muscle for some reason.

And after a moment Mike sighs, setting the bottle down. “Of course, I don’t exactly know how he would’ve handled the news—I mean, obviously I never told him—or anyone from back then—”

But what else would have upset his father so much? What could it possibly have been that he never told him…or anyone else? Drugs? No, because he said it had something to do with me too, so that can’t be it, not to mention the way he emphasized—

Mike hiccups. “As I say this now, you’re the first I’ve—”

Okay, but I’m the first what? I need you to say it!

“—and of course I never let it go with him...but then...it was too late. The option to even think about—well, about finally forgiving him...and telling him the truth about me—”

The truth about—okay, yeah, that has to be it—Ted must’ve said a bunch of homophobic shit to Mike and I was roped into the mix somehow, because Mike said his dad ‘implied horrible things’ that involved me, yet all of it also applied to Mike? So then he must’ve meant that he’s gay…or maybe he’s bisexual? What else would make Ted Wheeler lose his shit? What else would he want to conceal for so long? And that still had to do with me somehow—cause it sure as shit wouldn’t have been over video games…plus…no one—not Nancy, Holly, Karen, El, or any one else—has ever once mentioned anything to me about Mike having a girlfriend since…high school…

“—cut all the bullshit, but...it didn’t. And I didn’t even go—didn’t even go to his funeral. I didn’t deserve to. It’s stupid—or I’m stupid. And now with Nancy—I didn’t—fuck—I didn’t even...consider...that I had so little time left with her. And...my options were taken away...again. I could have—I could have...seen her more. I know we weren’t always...the closest, but she—she definitely made more effort than me—if I had just...been less of a dipshit and forced myself to visit...but now—well, I can’t do that anymore. She’s gone, Will. She’s really...” Mike pauses, then he whispers, “gone.”

And then Will looks back over at Mike—he was using his sleeves to dry his eyes, but his tears were relentless, continuing to spill over, and with snot also dripping from his nose. The mere sight of Mike in this state elicits tears of his own, as well as an overwhelming urge to comfort him, to offer him a shoulder, but when Will starts to inch closer to him, he hesitates. There was a time they used to hug, but what if Mike didn’t want to be touched?

Fuck it—he can push me away if he needs to.

Will must have caught him by surprise with his sudden impulse, because now Mike’s looking at him with glossy bloodshot eyes as a shuddered gasp escapes his pale lips. And then Mike starts to tremble as though he were on the cusp of shattering into a million pieces. But for a single selfish second, as Mike was falling apart right before his eyes, Will can’t help but marvel at the sheer impossibility of the situation. At how close he was to Mike. Their knees were now pressed together and the scent of his shampoo was so prominent—citrus and mint—mixed with a hint of alcohol coming from his breath. But the moment passes and then the instinct to wrap an arm around him kicks in, to draw him even closer. Mike’s head immediately falls onto Will’s shoulder and his sobs grow louder.

And between sobs and sniffles Mike starts stuttering, “I’m n-never gonna see her again—ever. Never hear her voice—see her s-smile. Never—and I missed out—the pictures—her! Never, n-never—I’m so stupid—stupid—” Without any warning, Mike moves to throw his arms around Will, seeming desperate as he grabs onto his shirt, pulling at the fabric so intensely that threads begin to snap, threatening to rip the seams apart entirely—hey, I like this shirt—except Will couldn't find it in him to make Mike stop. All he can do is try and hold him and hope that it helps. And when Mike starts to beg softly into his ear, the words tug even more at his heartstrings, “Please, please—don’t go. Please, you can’t go. Please, please s-stay—ple-please don’t go. I don’t want—I don’t want—don’t leave me again. Please, please don’t—don’t—don’t—” then Mike tucks his face into the crook of Will’s neck, his pleading words becoming too muffled to comprehend.

Will tries to ignore the small part inside of him that feels betrayed for allowing himself to get this close to Mike and risk his heart all over again. And he briefly thinks back to when he held that number in his hand, debating with himself for hours before he pushed a single button—before he ever left that voicemail—because he knew exactly what would happen. It was a slippery slope and the stakes were high. But of course, a larger part of him wanted Mike back more than anything, so he had set aside his fear and from the very second he dialed his number, he was all in—heart unsheathed and vulnerable. And now here he was, sitting on the floor of an old familiar basement, more than a little tipsy, with Michael Wheeler drunk and trembling in his arms, begging for him to never leave him again.

But tomorrow Mike would wake up and not remember any of this. And if Will were to ask him about it, he’d reply that he didn’t mean anything he said. That it was all a mistake. That it was only extreme grief and copious amounts of vodka that made him utter such words, but Will tries to ignore every invading thought. Thoughts driven only by fear—a defense mechanism designed to shield his heart by preparing him for some hypothetical worst case scenario like last time. Because something inside him was fully aware that he had slipped over that edge and he was falling once again for the idea of spending the rest of their lives together. And that maybe he wouldn’t survive this time if it all went wrong.

But it won’t. Not this time. This time it’ll be different—no more hiding.

“Hey, hey...it’s gonna be okay. I’m here...” Will whispers to him as he brings a hand up to stroke the back of Mike’s head, his hair the slightest bit damp to the touch, and then slowly his shaking begins to subside. “I know it hurts. But it’s gonna be okay... maybe not right now, but someday.”

Mike’s sobs taper off until the only sound filling the space in the room was REO Speedwagon’s Keep On Loving You;

“…When I said that I love you, I meant that I love you forever…”

Will rocks him gently side to side, humming the song as if it were a lullaby. Eventually Mike grows heavier in his arms and Will realizes it would be better for Mike to sleep in a bed, so he tries to rouse him. “Mike?”

No answer, so he tries again, giving him a little shake. “Mike…Mike?”

“Hmm.”

“Come on, let’s get you to bed—”

He groans at the suggestion.

“You can’t sleep like this, come on…”

Mike mumbles—it sounds like he was asking him to stay.

“I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

He finally manages to help him up, but they only get as far as the sofa bed right behind them. At first they both stay sitting at the very edge, with Mike still trying to hold onto Will, but in the end, Will gently eases him towards the pillow and he goes out like a light.

Will tilts his head as he leans over him, then reaches a hand out—at first it was to simply push back the hair from Mike’s eyes, but right after, he caresses his cheek with the back of his hand. Even with puffy eyes and tear-soaked skin with splotches of red, he was beautiful. Maybe more so now than ever before.

And Will felt guilty for wanting to capture Mike in such a dark moment. But that feeling didn’t stop him from picking up his sketchbook off the floor and opening it to an empty page…

#byler #byler fanfic #byler fanfiction #iawwyh

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fitbuturlosingit · 6 months

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My Fave Fanfic Authors.

I just wanted to do a shoutout post, for my fave fanfic authors. I am a sucker for a good fanfic, and these guys do it better than anyone else, in my humble opinion.

First up, we have my queen @negans-lucille-tblr (AKA Bee). Bee is undoubtedly my favourite writer. I’ve followed her work for a long time, through various different blogs, and for various different fandoms. Her Supernatural fics drew me in, then I fell in love with her Walking Dead and The Boys fics. I currently subscribe to her website, cos it has loads of cool members only stuff, and she writes a banging commission. (She will bounce ideas off you, and makes sure you’re always satisfied with the work). She’s also an absolute angel of a human being, and I’ve had some lovely conversations with her! ❤️

Next up, we have @kittenofdoomage who writes hands down, some of the best A/B/O dynamic fics I have ever read. I’m pretty sure her writing was my first proper discovery of A/B/O, and honestly, she blew my mind. If you like Supernatural, or the Walking Dead, then she should be top of your list. Pretty sure she also introduced me to some new kinks I never knew I had, haha!

Keeping with my Supernatural theme, I’m also going to recommend @pink-sparkly-witch ☺️ If like me you love Dean Winchester, and Jensen Ackles, then this is the blog for you. Her fics are incredible. She writes Jensen and Dean so well, it’s phenomenal. The way she writes paints such a vivid picture. I’m glad that I found her blog through other Supernatural themed blogs.

Moving on to my other obsessions now - The 1975. I’ve got a few authors that I follow, who write amazing 1975 fanfics.

First being @procrastinatinglikeapro who is very friendly, and answers any asks you send towards them. They’ve made me feel very welcome in this fandom, as it’s one of my newer fandoms. I love her writing style. I love how easy her master list is to navigate, she has a little key on there, so you know exactly what it is you’re looking for. Her posts are always a pleasure to see on my dash, and I just get all round good vibes from her. So, if you like The 1975, head on over and drop her a follow!

The next 1975 blog on my list is @tillthelandslide who actually follows me. I don’t have many followers so it meant a lot to me when she followed me. I’ve had some lovely interactions with her, which is always nice, especially when you’re new to a fandom like I am. (I’ve been in to The 1975 for just under a year, now). I originally followed her cos I loved her fics. Her fics are the reason I am now obsessed with Ross MacDonald, so thanks for that, girlie! Made For Me is such a good fic, and I bloody love it. Ross girlies, go read it! Again, her masterlist is easy to navigate, which I love. So yeah, go follow her!

We have the legend that is @lottiecrabie who is responsible for some of the classic 1975 fics. Fics like Don’t Fuck the Linecooks, and Choose Your Own Smut. I loved the innovation of Choose Your Own Smut. Very original idea, well executed. It was the first fic I’d read of hers, and I was HOOKED. Girl can write, hot damn. She’s definitely helped me become totally obsessed with the 1975, and now when I look at Matty pics I think “oooh this is PFMS coded”, or “this is so Linecook Matty”. It’s becoming a problem, haha!

@abiiors is another 1975 legend. Her masterlist is huge. So many incredible fics, so much talent. She’s responsible for me becoming obsessed with George. I never was a George girlie, but now I am. The “Threes a Party” fic changed my life. It was without doubt the hottest thing I have ever read. I still think about it now. Her posts make her seem like such a lovely person, and I feel like if we met, I’d really vibe with her.

@toomuchracket with the d word Matty posts. My god. I love her fics, and her blurbs. The blurbs are always fun little bits to read, and I find myself frequently looking through her masterlist to re-read my favourites. Again, seems like a genuinely nice person. I really enjoy her fluffy blurbs, as well as her smutty posts. Fluff doesn’t usually tend to appeal to me, but the way she writes it is so much more appealing, and interesting. It’s more realistic, and I do love that about her work.

Finally, @the1975attheirverybest is the blog I go to quite often. I find it very reliable in terms of news/updates so it’s a great way of keeping my finger on the pulse, in the fandom. I’ve had some really positive interactions with this blog. I’m trying to avoid using a gender as I don’t want to unintentionally misgender anyone, and I couldn’t see a clear indication of preferred pronouns, hence why I will refer to the blog as they. They have an extensive masterlist with Series, One Shots, and Concepts. It’s easy to navigate. I’ve read so many of their fanfics, and again, I really enjoy the writing style, and the blog itself, not just the fanfiction element.

Thank you for reading, if you managed to stick around until the end. I know it’s a lot of word vomit, and I’ve tried to keep it coherent, but I’m autistic, so my brain can’t always do that shit.

This post is just a massive love letter to my faves on tumblr, sending out good vibes, and love. You guys keep me sane, you give me a great way to unwind, and spend my time, and you keep me positive. So, thank you so much. Forever grateful for every single one of you.

#fanfic #fanfic rec #fanfic authors #supernatural #the 1975

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moonlitempty · 4 months

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“It’s our basic human right to be fuck-ups. This civilisation was founded on fuck-ups!”

And after roughly 3 weeks of waiting, hoping, and constant refreshing of the tracking page, here it is finally, I am able to hold it, and see it, and analyse every intricate little detail of its design, and its packaging. And it makes me feel somewhat fulfilled.

I honestly keep struggling to find the words for this caption, my thoughts are all over the place and it feels like no praise or fawning will suffice, no amount of love dumping will be nearly enough to describe how absolutely lovely this record is.

The World’s End is a film I was afraid I wouldn’t like, even when I was just getting into The Cornetto Trilogy and familiarising myself with everything around it, I could just TELL The World’s End was, not quite a black sheep, but the odd one out in the trilogy. I saw hordes and hordes of people rave over Shaun (rightfully), I saw thousand of dedicated followers of Fuzz (VERY rightfully), but at most I saw a couple hundred people campaigning for End to have more recognition. So when it came to finally watch it for the first time, I was honestly nervous and I vividly remember I had to keep pausing the movie over and over again whenever Gary said or did something dumb, I felt bad for him, he seemed enthusiastic and he longed for his old life with his friends and none of them even trusted him. So that set a very specific lens quite early on that I saw the whole movie throughout, and I think it actually helped me appreciate the movie from the get-go.

So I decided to put my big boy pants on, stop systematically pausing the movie, and sit through it, no more pauses or interruptions.

•“12 Historic Ale Houses!”

I quickly found myself enamoured with End, I loved the unapologetic and almost blatant Sci-Fi route of the film, after all, Sci-Fi in general is a genre I hardly consume, and it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that this film alone opened the doors of the genre to my once closed eyes. I grew to love the characters oddly quickly, my stand-outs obviously being Gary and Andy, but I also made room in my heart for Sam and Steven (the only survivors, ha!)

Also, it may have been the Blu-Ray doing its Blu-Ray thing but I thought the film looked PHENOMENAL, easily the most visually interesting film out of the Three, maybe it was also the use of more contemporary cameras and technology, it was an absolute treat to the eyes. The filmmaking and directing choices have been pointed out time and time again, Edgar Wright has the best directing style of any modern filmmaker.

But let’s get to the main subject, the soundtrack!

•The World’s End: Original Movie Score (Mondo Exclusive , Pressed on Crowning Glory Ale Vinyl)

This is a beautiful little record! It’s easily one of the prettiest in my entire collection, usually a splatter vinyl like this is pretty hit or miss, I’ve had my fair share of less than stellar records, but this one NAILED IT! I don’t know if you can tell from the pictures, but this record looks EXACTLY like a nice, cold, foamy and enriching pint of Ale, and the design of the centre labels is oddly satisfying, I lack the right words to describe it, but the entire film carries a sort of “vintage-ish” aesthetic in its graphic design and motifs, hopefully I’m making myself clear with that. It’s a mix of vintage and modern, if I had to describe it!

The record is very nice to the touch, it’s solid and quite heavyweight (which is a reassurance when it comes to vinyl), and it looks absolutely stunning when held up to the light. A detail I love is how the labels seem to slowly uncover the presence of The Network as they go on, by Side D the centre label makes it awfully clear that The Network is, a) a thing, and b) present everywhere in Newton Haven.

In the gimmick/fun little trinkets department, we have a small pamphlet! Styled as a tourist guide for the pubs in Newton, it features a full map of the town (the one Gary used to mark up the pubs), and the commentaries by both Edgar Wright and the composer Steven Price, these are frankly a treat to read and give so much more insight into not only the making of the score, but also the deeper meaning of the score, what Prince intended to transmit with the creative decisions he made while making and building the score, it makes listening to it a much more rewarding experience.

This will be forever one of my favourite items I’ve ever owned, period. Not favourite vinyl records, or movie memorabilia, items in general. And I feel immensely grateful to not only have it and hold it, but to also share it with everyone in a cohesive and engaging way. Writing this post has been an absolute privilege! Hopefully it is mildly decent and not just another one of my soliloquies.

If you got all the way here, you have my eternal gratitude and I love u mwah. here’s a cookie for your troubles 🍪

Let’s Boo-Boo.

#the cornetto trilogy #simon pegg #nick frost #edgar wright #the worlds end #gary king #andy knightley #vinyl #soundtrack #mondo #original score #vinylcollector #vinylcollection #vinyl records

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absolutebl · 1 year

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This Week In BL - I give out a bunch of 7/10s

Nov 2022 Wk 3

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying the most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Between Us (Sun iQIYI) 3 of 12 - I’m beginning to get concerned about where the plot, pace, and conflict is going to come from. So far it’s all angst and internal conflict, and I’m not entirely opposed to that, but there needs to be some external stressors in Thai BL or it’s not enough to carry 12 episodes (especially if it’s helmed by New). WATCH ALONG HERE.

Ai Long Nhai (Mon iQIYI) 9 of 10 - something actually happened in this ep, we got some of Ai’s family history & backstory. Evil mother is evil. Sister may be evil too. But it’s still shirtless so I’m pleased. Also, yay, no singing!

Remember Me (Sun Gaga) 7 of 12 - Name has finally made a new friend. JaFirst remain the most interesting. I actually don’t mind the show when it’s focused on them, but most of the rest of the time I find it, if not boring, at least not something that engages me personally. Although, the younger boy flirting with Em after cheer practice was kind of cute.

I Will Knock You (Fri Gaga) 2 of 12 - Thi is such a pushover. Look, I’m just not wild about this lead pair dynamic and I absolutely can’t stand the score.

609 Bedtime Story (Sat WeTV) 1 of 11 - Didn’t drop to WETV in my territory, no idea what’s going on. I’ll have a bit of a hunt when I get home.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

My Tooth Your Love (Taiwan Fri Viki) 8 of 12 - Every week I look forward to this show the most. We knew it had to happen, but it’s really sad to see our traumatized bar-boy break our beloved dentist’s heart. We all know they’re in love with each other, they also know it. But Bai Lang is very very scared of commitment and the dentist is a good boy who keeps getting hurt by other’s inability to trust and open up. The past romance was really sad and sadly true to life. Is it better to have a friend’s love or pity, if all you really wanted was friendship? I like how complicated all of these characters are. I love the conversation the leads had with each other after Bai Lang finally admits to his true feelings. Such a good show.

Eternal Yesterday AKA Eien no Kino (Japan Thurs Gaga) 6 of 8 - This show is so sad. I sometimes wonder if Kochi remains alive entirely because Michan wills him to be so. Does anybody else wonder if the gay biology teacher who lost his first love is a nod to Boys Love? Just me?

Choco Milk Shake (Korea Strongberry Tues YT) 7-8 of 10 - The pacing is so good in this show. Also, I am completely and utterly in love with the ex-bf (hi, Wild Dog, long time no see, wanna run away with me instead?)

Happy Ending Romance (Korea Thurs Gaga) 1-2 of 8 - Very dramatic opening. I like it. Leo is stupid pretty. This is a complicated, if improbable, plot about writers and ego and reputation, but engaging. (For a change I like the OST, Leo is also one of my favorite main singers among the honey-voices of Kpop.)

Finished This Week

Ghost Host, Ghost House (Weds YouTube) 8fin - An excellent confession sequence. I was a little surprised. Usually confession scenes make me wince, but this one was lovely. I’m not a fan of the Kdrama “separation in the final episode” (see Big D) but in this particular instance, I understand why they did it. The characters did need to mature and build new lives. It’s just annoying that they couldn’t do it together. All in all? This is a light horror plus family drama built around a well executed BL trough-line that felt honestly queer with great chemistry from the lead pair. (I hope that we see more of them.) For me personally the surrounding cast, premise, and story didn’t resonate but if you like a touch of gothic in your BL this might appeal. RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS 7/10

Big Dragon (Sat Gaga) 8fin - I really don’t like Thailand copying Korea’s arbitrary “separation in the final episode” thing. So for me this final episode wasn’t very satisfying. Ultimately? This is a decent execution of enemies to lovers, exploring some darker themes and nodding at kink in a more respectful way than Mame could ever dream, plus excellent chemistry, but something was askew around plot, directing, and ending. RECOMMENDED FOR THE LEAD PAIR, BUT NOT MUCH ELSE 7/10

Kabe Koji (Japan Mon Viki) 8fin - Japan sure does love the “running of the gays” trope. Only this time around they ran together. Which was kind of cute. Honestly? This probably should’ve been my favorite BL of all time, but for some reason it just never resonated with me. Also, I’m over the no kiss thing. I’m tired. If they kiss in het, they can kiss in gay. IT’S FINE. 7/10

Apparently, when Japanese BL is good, it’s very very good, and when it’s bad I’m annoyed.

It’s Airing But I’m Not Watching It

War of Y (Thai Gaga) 20 eps - it’s just all too much for me.

To Sir With Love AKA Khun Chai 16 eps - could be sad v worried

2 Moons 3 (Thai Mon ??) 10 eps - Possibly a future binge watch. Rumor is it’s banal.

Love Bill (Vietnam Sat YT) - Bah Vinh is back but I’m too distracted. Also there’s a lot of fund raising and stuff going on. I’ll wait and binge.

How is he so hot? Asking for science.

In Case You Missed It

My Roommate (Thai YT) 32 eps of 2 minutes each now done, it’s terrible production values so I’m not bothering but it’s been repackaged into 8 min chunks on the youtubes.

Fahlanruk (Thai GaGa) 12 eps - I cut my losses at ep 5 but it’s finished now, someone who knows my taste tell me if I should I bother?

SELF (Thai Thurs YT) is complete at 6 eps, anyone watch this one? Is it sad? Worth watching?

LITA special - it’s exactly as trashy and kinky as you want it to be. Go indulge, you lushes. Rain & Payu, man, wow. Also, the sound is terrible. But no one cares much about the script, least of all the writers.

GAP the series (Sat YT) is a classic office set romance. WATCH IT! It’s GL and this studio needs our support! (Also, the stairs are back!)

Coming to Viki: Love in the Air, ITSAY & IPYTM, Remember Me, and new KBL, The New Employee.

Gossip:

GMMTV posted their pilot trailers for 2023. I reported on them all here. Fewer this year than last which is a good thing, they should slow down and focus more.

How did my predictions go? Not good. Scored a 6/10 maybe 6.5 if you’re feeling generous.

Next Week Looks Like This:

2022 still to come?

Dec 9: Semantic Error movie (Viki) - the repackage rumored to have some added footage.

Dec 19: Chains of Heart (movie? theaters?) trailer Suspense thriller about a forest ranger, smugglers, memory loss, and lost love. Stars Haii (Cirrus in TT2) and Poppy (Porpla in YYY). Adapted from a Y-novel of the same name by TJ Tommy. I don’t know if this is still releasing or if C19 has effected it.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Win, my love! Just call me his of the morning, hia. Just touch my cheek before you leave me, hia.

In Stongberry we trust! *consent in the house*

This week’s earworm: Just B - Me (srs where did these boys come from? so good)

(last week)

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whataperfectwasteoftime · 1 year

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penny i have to ask - how does marcus treat an s/o who is completely new to bdsm and being tied up for the first time?!

GREAT QUESTION ANON

I love how I'm the Marcus Pike BDSM writer. I've got my niche, LOL.

Warnings: alcohol mention, D/s vibes, soft dom Marcus putting the soft in soft dom, bondage, blindfolds, oral sex (f receiving), food play, let me know if I missed anything I've already forgotten what the hell I wrote.

You’re just finishing getting ready for your date with your new boyfriend when you hear three soft knocks at your door.

You smile reflexively. It's only been a few months, but you have a good feeling about this one.

You open the door and let out a soft exclamation when you see the little container of chocolate-covered strawberries in your boyfriend's hand.

“What’s the occasion?”

Marcus Pike leans forward to kiss your cheekbone in greeting. “Do I need an occasion to dote on you?”

You laugh. “Most people do,” you say, taking the little package and stepping back, inviting Marcus into your apartment. He follows you into the kitchen, where you set the strawberries down on the counter. When you turn, he’s right there–crowding into your space and kissing you properly this time.

“I’m not most people,” he murmurs, before capturing your lips with his own.

“No,” you agree with a laugh. “No, you most certainly are not.”

Marcus pulls back with a playful pout on his face. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re the sweetest, most caring guy I’ve ever met,” you say honestly.

“Is that a bad thing?” Marcus asks. You can tell he’s half-joking, half-not. His past relationships have left their fair share of scars, causing him to occasionally second-guess himself. You’re always right there to pull him back from the edge, though. After all–everyone has scars.

“Of course it isn’t,” you say earnestly, pulling Marcus back toward you for another soft kiss.

“No?” Marcus is smiling, this time–the word uttered playfully against your lips as though he knows exactly what that dark, teasing tone of voice does to you.

“Well,” you say, pretending to think about it. “Come to think of it, you could be a little… less sweet, in some departments.”

Marcus laughs. “Like what?”

“Rougher,” you clarify breathlessly. “H-harder.”

“Oh–oh,” Marcus rasps, his tone deepening as he catches your meaning. “Is that right?”

It is. Marcus is an attentive lover; a thorough lover. He’s never satisfied until you’ve cum at least twice every session. It’s still early days in your relationship, but he seems to know exactly what buttons to push, and in what order, to keep you in a constant state of arousal for him. He’s passionate, tender, loving…

But part of you wants to feel the sting of his teeth, the bruising grip that you know those large hands are capable of. Marcus handles you as if you’re made of glass, but part of you wonders what would happen if he lets you crack, just a little.

“It’s okay,” you assure him automatically. You think that this man–with his puppy-dog eyes and his goofy jokes and his propensity for old, romantic movies–might not have any rough edges to him. You don’t want him to think that you don’t love him exactly the way he is, softness and all.

“What’s okay?” Marcus asks, looking confused.

“It’s okay if you don’t like that,” you say. “If you aren’t comfortable being rough with me.”

Marcus’s eyes are soft and patient when he looks at you, and you know what you’re saying must be true.

“Is that what you want?” he asks quietly, without any hint of judgment in his tone.

“Y-yes. No? I don’t know,” you answer honestly. “It doesn’t matter. I just want you. In every way.”

Marcus melts further under your admission, but all he does is give you a soft kiss on the forehead. “Let’s get going, pretty girl.”

Dinner is wonderful, as usual. Marcus never fails to be an incredibly fun date–always there with a funny story, always listening intently to everything you say, and always sitting close enough to touch you but never making you feel crowded. His fingers gently skim across your own as he talks, the casual touch making your brain spark pleasantly.

Yeah, Marcus might be the sweetest, softest guy in the world.

You can’t say that you mind it.

One after-dinner drink turns into two, then three. You’re pleasantly tipsy as the two of you finally get up from the intimate booth to leave. Marcus’s hand is on the small of your back, his breath disturbing the shell of your ear as he murmurs, “Let’s go back to mine.”

You giggle and press back against him, feeling the already-stiffening length in Marcus’s pants. You hear him swallow a strained sound behind you.

The both of you are still giggling and breathless when Marcus finally unlocks his door just ten minutes later. You barely make it inside before he’s there–pressing you up against the wall and letting his lips trace a path up and down the side of your neck. The soft touch of his mouth always brings goosebumps to the surface and tingles down your spine. You’re sighing happily at Marcus’s tender affections, when suddenly, he bites down and sucks a deep mark into your skin.

Over your choked gasp, you hear him talk.

“Been thinking about what you said,” Marcus rasps. “Fuck, I’ve been thinking about it all night.” His hands grasp your hips as he presses forward even further, seeking friction on his cock and causing your back to slide against the hallway. “Baby, you have no idea what I want to do to you.”

“Tell-ah!–tell me,” you whimper, urged on by the surprising roughness in Marcus’s actions.

“Wanna tie you up,” Marcus murmurs against your neck. “Blindfold you. Wanna hear you beg for me.”

You think you’d fall down where you were if Marcus wasn’t effectively pinning you in place against his wall. “Marcus–”

“You think I don’t wanna be rough with you?” Marcus rasps in your ear. “Baby, you don’t know how much I’ve been holding back. How much I want to give you.”

“Okay,” you exhale.

Marcus pulls back. “Okay?” he repeats.

“Show me. Show me all of it.”

Marcus lets out a strange, pleasure-soaked sound that you’ve never heard from him before. He’s usually vocal in bed, seeming to know that his voice is one hell of an asset, but he’s always very self-controlled, very purposeful with it. Now, you finally get it. You understand–Marcus Pike has been holding out on you.

You think you know why. You’d told him that you hadn’t had the best experience in the past with sex–relatively late to lose your virginity, never quite understanding what was so great about it (and oh, Marcus has been methodically proving you wrong orgasm by thigh-shaking orgasm). He’s probably been afraid of scaring you off, or worse, hurting you in some way.

Marcus wastes no time in pulling you to his bedroom. His moves are the same: gently laying you down on the bed, covering your body with his and overwhelming your every sense with him. His hands slide up your shirt, his body presses against yours, his lips take and take and take until you feel like you can’t breathe.

Your clothes are shed gradually, Marcus removing every layer reverently and taking his time with each. You've yet to have a 'quickie' with this man–you wonder if he's even capable of it, typically not satisfied until he's tasted every inch of your skin and both of you are completely and utterly sated.

You smile up at him as he removes his shirt, taking in the gentle musculature of his chest and the slight swell of his belly. He's a gorgeous man–in shape without being overly obnoxious about it, naturally broad-shouldered, with a light smattering of hair that you found exactly one silver strand in the other day.

“How do you feel about being tied up?” Marcus whispers softly in your ear.

You don’t have to think about it. “Yes,” you answer automatically. “With your handcuffs?”

“Nah,” Marcus says, chuckling. “Those aren’t meant to be comfortable. You’ll end up with red marks all over your wrists.”

“What did you have in mind?” you ask.

Marcus’s eyes are sparkling with mirth as he climbs off of you for a moment, digging in his drawer for a moment before pulling out… is that rope?

Your eyes must be as wide as dinner plates as Marcus returns, placing it in your hands, letting you touch it.

“It’s so soft,” you say, surprised.

Marcus chuckles at your exclamation. “It is,” he agrees. “Won’t hurt that pretty skin.” He covers your hands in his, trapping the length rope between you and bringing your inner wrist to his mouth to kiss gently. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“I like it,” you breathe.

“Good.”

You lie back down on the bed and raise your arms above your head, looking up at him expectantly.

“Hang on,” Marcus says with an affectionate smile. “We’ve gotta have the safeword discussion.”

“I trust you,” you say automatically.

Marcus shushes you gently. “I’m glad, but we still need to talk about it,” he says. “Listen, I will always stop if you say anything like ‘no’ or ‘stop,’ unless we’ve talked about it beforehand, but I want you to think about how you’re feeling like you would a stoplight, okay? So if you’re green, everything’s great, yellow means to slow down because you’re getting close to your limit or feeling uncomfortable in any way, and red means stop everything immediately. Make sense?”

You think you may have underestimated Marcus Pike.

“Makes sense,” you agree.

Marcus gently grasps your wrists where they’re still raised above your head. “So, if I ask for your color, you say–”

“Green,” you answer with a gleeful smile. “Definitely green.”

“Good,” Marcus whispers. “Oh, fuck, I’ve wanted to do this, baby,” he admits as he winds the soft, silken rope around your wrists in a series of delicate loops and knots that manages to be both comfortable and snug. Your arms are perfectly immobilized as he secures them to the headboard.

Even though your heart is pounding in your chest, you feel safer than ever in Marcus’s bed. The man is looking down at you as if you’re the most precious thing he’s ever seen, and there’s a resulting ache in your chest at the look in his eyes. It’s hungry, sure, but you can see those three little words–the ones that neither of you have said yet–swimming just below the surface.

Marcus’s hands explore you, having open access to you without any hope of intervention. He rubs his thumb over your bottom lip, teases your nipples until they’re both rigid peaks, digs his fingertips into your ribs just to see you try and squirm away from him. No skin is left untouched, and suddenly, you get it. Why Marcus would like this. It hadn’t made sense at first–Marcus Pike, and BDSM? Blindfolds and handcuffs? You wouldn’t think that someone so incredibly gentle would have silk bondage rope in his bottom drawer, but you think you understand as you watch Marcus’s eyes roam over your body with undisguised lust.

It’s no secret that Marcus Pike is a possessive man. Not in a creepy or demeaning way, but in the way that you know he wants the two of you to belong to each other. You know that’s why he’s such a tactile person, always there with a hand on the small of your back or threading your fingers together as you walk. Restrained on his bed like this, you feel more like you belong to him than you ever have. His.

“Color?” Marcus asks, as his fingers skate down the skin of your belly, traveling south with a purpose.

“Still green,” you whisper with a serene smile.

“Good girl.”

Marcus teases your clit with delicate touches until you’re panting on the bed. When you start to squirm, he chastises, “Stop moving, or I’m gonna have to tie your ankles, too.”

You clench around nothing at his words. “Yeah,” you say breathlessly. “Yeah, do that.”

“Shh, one thing at a time, baby.”

“Marcus,” you whine.

“We’ve got time,” he whispers. “Oh, we’ve got time. And I plan–” he brings his fingers to his mouth to lick them clean of your juices– “to savor it.”

You whimper again and buck against the bed.

Marcus chuckles. “You really want more?”

You nod rapidly. “Please.”

Marcus lips are parted, his eyes half lidded as he watches you squirm and plead for him. “You perfect fucking thing,” he mutters. The words are barely audible, and you aren’t sure if he’d actually meant to speak them out loud, or if he’d been talking to himself. Either way, he gives you a soft smile and gets up again, going to his closet this time.

“I’m not tying your ankles to the bed, not this time,” he announces, pulling out whatever it was he had been looking for. You crane your neck to try and see what it is. “But I think you might like this, hmm?”

He holds up the object in his hand, and you realize it’s one of his ties. You watch as he kneels back on the bed at your side. “Lift your head,” he directs, and you do, allowing him to slip the fabric around you as a blindfold.

“Look at you,” Marcus murmurs. “Do you trust me?”

“Of course,” you answer immediately.

“Then hang on a second. Want to go grab something real quick. I’ll be right back, okay?”

You nod, and feel the mattress shift as Marcus leaves. You can hear him in the apartment, shuffling around, opening something in the kitchen, and coming back. You furrow your brow under the makeshift blindfold. What is he up to?

The mattress dips again, and you let out a soft sound of surprise when something cool and sweet drags against your lips. It… it feels like…

“Wait–do you have chocolate strawberries at your place, too?”

Marcus laughs sheepishly above you. “When I bought yours, I thought they looked really good, so I bought two,” he admits. “Now I’m really glad that I did.”

You laugh too. Adorable man. Your amusement fades when the coolness of the fruit touches the tip of your nipple, making you squeak in surprise. The cold is quickly replaced by the heat of Marcus’s mouth as he engulfs your breast, licking the sweet residue off of you with a little moan of satisfaction.

“Bite.” The strawberry is at your lips again, and you obey, humming at the contrast of the chocolate and the fruit.

Wet coldness bursts around your other nipple as Marcus moves the strawberry again, quickly followed by his mouth as he swirls his tongue around the stiff peak.

“Good girl, fuck, so good for me,” Marcus murmurs. “Can’t decide which is sweeter.”

You know he ate the rest of the strawberry, because his tongue, when he crawls between your legs and laps at your clit, is still unnaturally cool. You whimper and moan as the temperature climbs along with your rising orgasm, until you’re all-but-grinding on his face and Marcus is eating you out with his typical ravenous enthusiasm.

The thin thread holding your pieces together snaps, and you keen loudly as you cum on Marcus’s tongue. In turn, Marcus groans loudly and pulls you against his face harder, lapping up everything you give him until you’re shaking with overstimulation.

“Okay, it’s definitely you,” Marcus murmurs. “See?”

The bed dips as Marcus climbs up your body and kisses you deeply, swirling his tongue inside you much in the same manner he had been just moments ago somewhere else. The taste of your own desire bursts on your tongue, and you moan into his mouth.

Marcus pulls away and presses another strawberry against your lips. “Which is better?” he husks in your ear as you dutifully eat the fruit.

“The strawberry.” Your mouth wavers as you fight not to laugh–you know that wasn’t the answer he was looking for.

“Wrong,” Marcus growls playfully, taking your lips again. “Next time, I’m going to have to punish you.”

Something like adrenaline and desire swoops through your belly at his words. "L-like what?"

"I'll have to think about it," Marcus teased. "Maybe I won't let you cum until you're crying for me," he suggests. "Or maybe we'll see how much this pretty ass shakes when I spank it."

"Marcus," you whisper. "Holy shit, Marcus, you're filthy."

"I think you like it," he shoots back with a smile in his voice.

"I never knew."

The blindfold suddenly moves up and away from your eyes, and you blink in the unexpected brightness.

"Didn't wanna scare you off," Marcus confesses, looking down at you. "Not everyone… well, not everyone likes this." His eyes are far away for a moment, reliving a past unpleasant memory.

"I like this," you say quietly, giving Marcus a smile.

His stormy expression melts in an instant, his teeth showing as he rakes his eyes up and down your restrained body.

"Yeah," Marcus agrees, looking down at your pussy, which is still glistening with slick for him. "Yeah, I'd say you do."

You give Marcus a saucy look. "So do it some more," you command.

Marcus’s sparkling eyes are the last thing you see before he replaces the blindfold and you're plunged into darkness again.

#marcus pike #marcus pike x you #marcus pike x reader #marcus pike x f!reader #the mentalist #pedro pascal

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eternal-moss · 6 months

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AA THE SECOND EPISODE IS JUST AS GOOD

Honestly, I’m having so much fun with this, there wasn’t a single moment I didn’t enjoy. The way Hua Cheng manages to keep everyone ‘happy’ while maintaining composure and an aura of strength is so well done, and really displays his intelligence.

Also, he’s the biggest simp on earth. That mantou was mank beyond belief and he’s just there smiling while holding it in his hands like it’s the greatest treasure in the world. Xie Lian literally told him it was stale and he’s like :) but it’s from you :D… this man I swear.

Lang Qianqiu is so great!!! I love him and his steadfast morals & hotheaded nature, I really enjoy characters that are kind and impulsive at the same time. SQX, LQQ & XL are such a great trio, they really have a good dynamic. The episode was less centred around her, but Shi Qingxuan is still wonderful, I love how exasperated he sounded the whole time, and his disbelief at how Hua Cheng was acting despite being part of the whole Banyue Pass Debacle is funny as hell.

Getting to see the first crumbs of romantic Hualian scenes is great, it’s been a long buildup and the payoff is satisfying and so sweet. After Xie Lian having shit luck his whole life, Hua Cheng gently takes him by the hand and helps him overcome it. The whole scene, as ridiculous as it was, was genuinely heartwarming.

Well except for poor Lang Qianqiu, but his decision to go against the second highest supreme in his own territory was not the brightest. He was very lucky Xie Lian came with him, I’m not sure what the outcome would be otherwise. Although I do feel sorry that he got smacked by pretty much everyone including Shi Qingxuan..

And the cliffhanger!!!! Poor Lang Ying man, I’m looking forward to next episode but he just seems to have misery after misery.

#天官赐福 #天官赐福第二季 #花城 #谢怜 #郎千秋 #师青玄 #花怜 #郎萤 #Tgcf #Tgcf season 2 #Heaven’s official blessing #Hua Cheng #Xie Lian #Hualian #Shi Qingxuan #Lang Qianqiu #Lang Ying #Mossy rambles

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trashiewrites · 1 year

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Most of the HCs I've done! Graves edition!

I know there will be those mother fuckers who really really simp for graves! Tbh I get it, I really do... despite being morally questionable here is your food my children :) have some head cannon you feral fucks :D

Relationship: +he likes his women like he likes his job :) morally questionable. +honestly wants someone to understand the nature of his career and not judge his weird excitement of each mission. +CEO of loving his team more than you maybe +despite his career being hella hella classified, he tells you everything + "oh ho ho you should of see it (y/n ) THEY WENT DOWN LIKE FLIESSS! It's like watching those oddly satisfying videos online. You know what I'm talking about right?" + firstly its a bit off-putting that he compared it to that but at this point, you have accepted it :/ +he is surprisingly clingy +very v e r y protective +almost killed a man who catcalled you ohhh you wonder how he's a free man at times.

Sick: +This man is actually really good to be sick with :D +He has this really good passed-down homemade chicken soup recipe that he makes you +Lots and lots of blankets + Plays your favorite music, tv show, or movie. + the only bad thing is ALL YOULL EAT IS SOUP, ONLY SOUP! +When you finally aren't sick You jump to eat something that is SOLID! GOD 4 DAYS OF SOUP S U C K S

+About him getting sick? He doesn't and rarely does... +And when he does, you don't even know. +He will still like his normal self and do his normal thing. +You don't know unless one of his boys tells you. +In which case you yell at him and force him to rest but by the time that happens he is already almost better.

Christmas: +Christmas with this man is an interesting one... +Lively is the best way I can respectfully say it. + Bring out every kind of booze +Tbf wouldn't be surprised if they brought weed. Def seems like the legal weed guy. +OFC they didn't do this at your shared house, you would kill him if the stench stayed and he wasn't gonna risk that. +You didn't really care about what they do really as long as there are no hookers. +You are mainly with your family anyways for the holidays since you really don't like his team's parties. Been to it once and never again. +he joins you for a day on Christmas with your family and at least spends one day with you before heading to work again. + He got you a lovely little gold bracelet with little charms of your fav stuff + You got him a new fancy watch since he's been nagging about how his old one kept going out of sync. +Overall, a dandy time despite his mates sending pics later of their party which are usually really funny pictures odd him doing dumb shit.

Wedding: +OFC, he proposed, he was pretty classic about it. +It was the middle of winter and you two were chilling on a bridge and he kinda just went "Hey, you know why would be cool?"And he bent down behind you as you proceed to ask what and turned around "If we got married." +He had a smug look the entire time by the way... Smug ass motherhecker. +After saying yes, the next 6 months of planning were actually terrific. +He let you do all the planning since having a wedding was more your thing and he really didn't argue with you. + you had no price limit but OFC you didn't milk him dry. + You got your dream wedding, your dream outfit oh my it was amazing! +Most likely to be a Disney wedding :/ just feel like he would allow it +if you don't like Disney, just think of your ideal dream wedding and it prob happened with this man.

#philip graves #cod #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty #shadow company #cod mw22 #modern warfare #modern warfare 2 #cod mw #cod mw2 spoilers #maybe

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lunariamv · 24 days

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i love edgelords <3 adachi tohru x fem reader (part 3) | [Part 1] [Part 2] im late but i finally did it >:D adachi gets clocked by girlboss; featuring: female rage

The formidable shadow burst into a million particles. A satisfied exhale escaped you as you lowered your smoking gun. The leftover rush from the fight was settling in your veins. That has to be the last one, right? Everything was leading up to the end, and you were determined to clear this dungeon. You were getting closer. The finale was drawing ever so near, and you could feel it in your bones.

Turning your head over your shoulder, your hair swayed in the faint breeze. Standing behind and beside you were the seven high schoolers (and bear) you were in charge of. “Are you guys alright?”

Call it your maternal instincts kicking in, but you wanted to make sure the kids were prepared to keep going. Everyone needed to be at their best if you wanted to stand a chance at defeating Adachi. Losing wasn’t an option.

“Yeah, we’re good!” Chie replied. Honestly, she was pretty fired up. She could fight these shadows, and still be full of energy.

“Yes ma’am.” Kanji added politely. The others uttered similar notions.

Upon everyone’s confirmation, a smile formed on your lips. Glad to see you were all on the same page. “Okay, good. We’re almost to the end, aren’t we?”

Rise, the eyes and ears of the team, nodded. Since the way had been cleared up, her persona had an easier time detecting enemies. Adachi in particular. “Yeah. He should be down that way…!” She replied firmly. Teddy could sense it as well. All of you were almost to the final stage.

“Let’s go then.” You declared, and the leader of the investigation squad agreed. Stepping forward, Yu took charge and led the group.

Inside the winding nexus of concrete paths and caution tape, there was a singular path to the end. Just before your feet, there was a long stretch of path ahead. Taking a deep breath, you took off with the students.

This was it. You’d finally get the closure you had been waiting for.

As you kept up your brisk pace, Yukiko jogged alongside you. She turned her head to face you.

“Are you gonna be okay, Miss (Y/N)?” She held a look of concern. All of them knew that Adachi used to be an important person to you. To face him head on like this would be rough.

Upon hearing her worries, Rise, Chie, and Naoto slowed down to join in the conversation. It was horrible what Adachi did to you, betraying your trust like that. They couldn’t imagine what it was like for a person they liked to turn out to be a completely different person.

“...I’ll be fine.” You replied with a faint smile. To you, this was nothing.

Admittedly, it warmed your heart to see that the girls empathized with you. In fact, the days leading up to the dungeon were filled with talks from the girls. They were there for you in Adachi’s absence, and the reassurance was comforting. It was a reminder you weren’t alone in this endeavor. Your Ex’s reckless and twisted actions affected so many people. Soon to be many more. Whether you were prepared or not, you had to stop him at all costs. Everyone deserved justice.

A confident smirk formed on your lips. “I’m just ready to take him down already.” You joked.

The boys were in full agreement with that sentiment. Not only did they want to beat him up, but also for your honor and Nanako’s. “Hell yeah, we’ll kick his ass!” Kanji cheered, and Yosuke agreed.

The group was successfully hyped up now. The eight of you ran down the long narrow path littered with signs and caution tape. The red mist was vaguely hazy through your glasses. Off in the distance, you could see the end of the line. At the finish line was a figure standing there.

Upon spotting the edge, you picked up your speed. Closely behind, the others followed suit. Once you caught up to the figure, your movements skidded to a halt. All done in stilettos. It was impressive how well you moved in heels.

Adachi’s back was turned to your group. There was a brief pause, then he gradually turned around. As he did so, he offered your group a slow pity clap.

“Wow, I’m surprised you made it this far.” He observed. Though he said it to the group, it was mostly meant for you in particular. The drive you had to beat him was fascinating.

At the forefront of the investigation team, you crossed your arms. If he tried anything, you’d do your best to protect the kids. They took priority, as their personas were much stronger than yours. So you served as the support, and the first line of defense.

“I’m surprised you can even see.” You retorted as you placed him under heavy scrutiny.

He raised a brow. “Huh? Of course I can see.” For a moment, his dark nature dropped due to his confusion. What kind of observation was that?

You tilted your head curiously. Raising your hand, you pinched the temple of your glasses and lowered them about an inch. Just to be sure. As you expected, the scenery before you was barely visible. A foggy, hazy mess. Without the lenses, it was hard to make him out. You skeptically narrowed your eyes and moved your specs back up. “Really…? Isn’t it foggy?”

The teenagers with you realized you had a point. Does Adachi not need glasses because he’s a shadow or something?

“Oh no, I can see you perfectly fine, (Y/N)...” Adachi shook his head with a chuckle. The fog was nothing to him. In fact, it was comforting more than anything. Smirking, a low rumble left his throat. “And man, you look as lovely as ever~”

Gross. Needless to say, his compliments had you grimacing in disgust. Any of his flirting attempts were like a mouthful of sand. Glaring, you held your hip. Everything he said got on your nerves now.

“Enough.” Naoto noticed your mild discomfort. “Allow me to confirm the crimes you’ve committed thus far.”

“You had suspicions that this world was dangerous, yet you threw Mayumi Yamano into the TV. Knowing full well that Ms. Yamano died here, you did the same to Saki Konishi. Not only that, but you duped Namatame into taking over your murder attempts, while you watched like a spectator at a game. When the disappeared stopped dying, you sent a warning letter to ensure more victims.”

Adachi sighed with disinterest.

“Even when a copycat killer arose, you had the gall as a detective to eliminate a suspect under investigation.” Naoto’s glare burned. “Two people died in the last six months, and a young girl is now in critical condition… but that’s not all.”

“If at any turn something had gone wrong, many more would have succumbed… all for some foolish ‘excitement,’ like a criminal reveling in the chaos he creates!”

Naoto put it better than you ever could.

“You’re disgusting, Adachi. To think you’d go as low as to convince me to turn my back on everyone. These kids have a better grasp on reality than you do.” You spoke up.

Yosuke and the others were surprised by what you revealed. Adachi tried to trick you into joining him?! This guy was more than messed up.

Admittedly, Adachi was a little hurt by your words. “Oh come on, (Y/N). All I did was put people in here.” He retorted. His tone was normal and flat, as if he was a disinterested child being lectured. “It’s the world that really kills them, isn’t it?”

His gaze wandered over to the red sky. “This world reflects people’s thoughts… which… oh dear… does that mean the real culprits are everyone on the outside, including you?”

What backwards logic. “That may be fundamentally true, but who are you to lead them to the slaughter?” You glared at him.

It’s true, not everyone was strong enough to face themselves. That doesn’t mean they deserve to be taken advantage of and killed.

“Face it for what it is. If you didn’t do what you did, Mayumi and Saki would still be alive.” Your targeted gaze was narrow and filled with contempt. It was his actions that damned them to the afterlife. “Why don’t you be a man and own up to your crimes, instead of making up excuses?”

“Yeah, to hell with that!” Yosuke barked. Like you said, it was a shitty excuse. “You did that stuff knowing full well those people were gonna die! If that’s not a crime, then what is!?”

Adachi snickered in response. “Haha… you’re so self-righteous.” He retorted smugly.

Chie was appalled by his words. For an officer of the law, his attitude was so out of place. “How can you say that…!? Aren’t you a police officer!?” She questioned.

He was a detective, the same as (Y/N). While you became an officer to help people, here was this messed up guy in the same field hurting people. He was a walking contradiction. “Out of everything you could have been, didn’t you specifically choose to join the police!?”

“Don’t make me laugh. Just because someone joins the police doesn’t make them some kinda ‘agent of justice.’” Adachi scoffed in a disparaging tone. The credulous precedent made his skin crawl.

Upon hearing that, your fists involuntarily clenched. That crossed the line for you. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. “What are you saying? That’s the whole point… that’s your job…!” You exclaimed.

It both horrified and frustrated you to think he didn’t take his job seriously. Bad actors like him were an insult to your integrity as a detective. All of your talks with him of busting culprits, and helping people… it was all a lie. To think you thought he was being sincere when you opened up to him. Helping people and being a detective was part of your identity… so it was personal.

Why would he even bother?!

His eyes met your hardened ones. “Do you really wanna know why I applied, (Y/N)? So I could legally carry a gun… that’s all.” He replied, shrugging nonchalantly. “You’d be surprised how many are like that.”

Brows furrowing, your expression twisted to one of shock. “...You’re joking.” The corners of your lips turned downward. Just to own a gun…? Seriously? He’d compromise the principles of the police, just for a simple weapon?

“You wanted a gun?” Face stuck in disbelief, you stared at him in horror. It quickly changed to one of frustration. The notion was so absurd you had to reaffirm it. With one hand over your chest, your other swung your arm to the side. Though you originally wanted to remain calm when confronting Adachi, it was impossible. Rage was boiling inside you thanks to his absurdity. Growing more heated in the argument, your voice raised in volume. “Then move to the States! Their firearm laws are much more relaxed there…!”

While you agreed it was nice to carry a firearm, you didn’t understand his odd desperation for one. Going so far as to force an occupation just to get one. It didn’t make any sense. “There was no need to incriminate yourself and ruin the integrity of the police! Where’s your sense of honor?!” You argued.

While everyone bore some resentment for Adachi, they could tell your back and forth was much more heated. None of them had ever seen you this angry before. It was very personal between you two.

“Honor?” He tilted his head at you. A short, pitiful laugh escaped his lips. As much as he liked you, preachy garbage like that got on his nerves. “When you’re like me, you don’t get that sort of privilege.”

“Everything and everyone around me was boring. I was surrounded by idiots. Then one little mistake bought me scrutiny, and a ticket to Nowheresville. Why bother with honor or integrity when life is just a sham?”

You bit your tongue. Before all of this, you did think that compared to yourself, he was a lost man. What you didn’t know was the true extent.

“I was bored shitless and wondering what to do next… when I discovered this power.”

Kanji for one, agreed with you regarding honor. A piece of shit like Adachi didn’t deserve powers like the rest of you if he couldn’t even have a single shred of dignity. “For crying out loud… why a bastard like you!?”

“A gift for having to put up with this lame job out in Nowheresville, I guess.” Adachi said simply. His expression was plain again, the one you used to like. “I did that stuff ‘cause I could. And it got interesting, so I watched.”

“That’s your reason!? You can’t be serious…!” Yukiko scoffed. She couldn’t believe how apathetic the man was. It was horrifying to know this was the type of person they were supposed to trust with their safety. “You really don’t care what happens to our world!?”

“Let’s be honest. There’s nothing great about the real world, is there? It’s just dull and annoying as hell.” Adachi held a scowl. “No one accepts that’s the way things are… they’re just stuck with it because they can’t deny it, either.”

“Those who actually succeed in life… they just happen to be born with the magic ticket called ‘talent.’ If you don’t have it, you can either accept or deny that fact until you die. That’s your only choice.”

He averted his gaze. “Once you realize that, all you have left in life is despair. The ultimate game over. Wouldn’t it be better if that kind of reality was wiped away?”

“You don’t actually believe that crap, do you?” You couldn’t help but ask that rhetorical question. Hearing his defeatist rantings made you feel an ounce of pity for him.

As you spoke, you held your hand over your chest. Your eyes flickered with conviction. “Life can be unfair, but what makes it boring or exciting is up to you. Instead of giving up, you work and adapt for the things you want.”

Adachi went silent for a moment. Perhaps processing your words. Then he scoffed quietly.

“You’re so naive, (Y/N)... it kind of pisses me off.” He grinned at you. It appeared the advice went through one ear and out the other. “You don’t get what it’s like to be me. You’re pretty and you have talent. You have it easy, and you can have it much easier if you wanted to.”

It was impressive to him that you were a good detective. However, he wouldn’t have been surprised if you got advantages due to other factors. And even then, you could always be a trophy wife if you ever got tired of working. It wasn’t the same thing for him. He didn’t get those advantages.

“Shut the hell up.” You uttered with wide eyes.

Instead of screaming or yelling, you were eerily calm. Though you didn’t shout, your voice was laced with burning anger. It was enough to give anyone chills.

He doesn’t get to say that. You spent years of painstaking labor to get to where you were at. Even more for people to start taking you seriously. In truth, you had to spend years in a similar situation to Naoto. In a job you loved, but one where you were held back, shunned, or mocked just for being a woman in a male dominated profession.

Being pretty or ‘talented’ wasn’t strictly a blessing. It can be a curse. Drawing the ire of people just because of how you look. Talent can mean nothing when your mere existence decided your worth. Getting advantages or disadvantages because of how you are perceived. All you wanted was to work hard and be acknowledged for your skill rather than your looks. Even now, you were close but not entirely there.

He knew that, and he had the gall to say you had it easy.

Naoto herself understood how you felt, and she was just as disgusted by his speculation.

“Just where the hell do you get off saying any of this, Adachi?” You spoke up.

“You think you know true adversity because… you were given a slap on the wrist, and kicked out of the city? Your life got a little too boring, and you’re too lazy to spice things up?”

“Instead of turning anything around… you sit there and cry about it?” You scoffed. The rage was boiling over. “Poor Adachi. Wow, I feel so sorry for you. You pathetic piece of garbage.”

“I mean it when I said life is dictated by how you live it. Your life is boring because of your own choices. Holding a pity party whilst doing nothing to improve it isn’t going to change anything.”

“You’re coping when you say ‘that’s how reality is.’ It isn’t. I’m sorry your life is terrible, but not everyone aspires to live the same way you do.”

“So please, don’t patronize to me about your shitty life experience when you’re not even trying.”

“Hell yeah, (Y/N)! Tell it like it is!” Kanji cheered you on. Him and the others had been silent, but they were enjoying hearing you dress down Adachi like this. He needed someone at his level to knock him down a peg.

It was inspiring to hear you talk. It made them fired up for the incoming battle.

“That’s why… this entire farce is pathetic. It’s cowardly to destroy the world and ruin things for everyone else because you want to be cynical. It’s selfish, and childish.” It was hard to believe this was the same man you fell for. Should you even be calling him a man at this point?

His plan to turn everyone into shadows was ludicrous. You stared at him, your gaze shimmering with conviction. “You’re far too close-minded to decide how the world will run.”

Perhaps in another life, your words would have reached him. If your paths had crossed sooner, he could’ve turned it all around. But it was too late. The damage had already been done. He was too far gone now to be reached. The harsh truth was threatening to shatter his ego.

“Shut up…. shut up, (Y/N)...!!!”

Adachi glanced down. A faint blue glow began to overtake his body.

“Be careful! I dunno what’s happening!” Teddy warned the group. Whatever it was, it wasn’t good.

The blue light continued emanating off his body like smoke. His eyes were glowing yellow. It was the same phenomena that occurred when the others encountered their shadow forms. A haunting realization came to you. Here, there wasn’t a second Adachi to contrast the first.

Meaning they were one and the same.

“You all saw Shadows as mere monsters, didn’t you!? These things move on pure instinct! They go wild because you defy them!” Adachi’s voice was now distorted. “If you don’t want to be with me, but those annoying little brats… then so be it! You won’t be welcomed in the new world!”

“What new world? La la land?” You asked. A faint grin of amusement tugged on your lips. He was delusional if he thought you’d let him destroy the world and rebuild it in his image.

Adachi was at a loss. He couldn’t believe you were betraying him. The only person who brought him comfort was now against him. He was trapped in a corner.

It was all one big migraine. “Stop… stop trying to act tough, (Y/N)!” He lashed out at you. His composure was gradually getting worse. He was hunched over, as if in pain.

He held his temples, his entire body shaking. “You have no idea what kinda shit I’ve been through!!” He shouted.

“Get over yourself.” You sighed, adjusting your suit blazer. At this point, you’ve had it with him. “I dealt with a lot of injustice and nonsense. You don’t see me crying and scorching the Earth over it.”

Honestly, you didn’t mind being ruthless. It appeared Adachi had made up his mind about how he wanted to live. Therefore, all of the generous empathy you had for him was spent. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to change.

Adachi yelled out in rage. His body dispersed into particles of shadow. Everyone else got into their fighting positions.

“Here he comes!” Rise warned. “This will probably be our last battle… let’s hit him with everything we’ve got!”

“The world is about to change…” Adachi’s body materialized from the shadows. He whipped out his gun. “Your existence won’t belong there!”

“I thought I could just leave you be, but you’re like a plague… I’ll have to get rid of all of you!”

“So be it.” You exhaled sharply. As you spoke, your vindictive gaze never left him. It was hard to believe this was your reality now. A nightmare made real. The man standing before you, the person you had to fight was your former lover. However, instead of shying away from the truth, you’d embrace it head on. “Let’s go guys…! I’m not letting us lose to the likes of him!”

“Right! Let’s work together! There’s no way we can lose to this bastard!” Yosuke and the others agreed. It was finally time to kick his ass for all the things he’s done.

Looking at the others, you nodded. Whether or not you still held feelings, you’d take him down all the same.

It was an exciting set of circumstances too. Beating your ex, to save the world? A faint chuckle escaped you at how poetic it was. “I’m going to enjoy this.” You smirked. With a snap of your fingers, your card shattered into a million pieces. A shimmering blue flame sparked behind you, and your persona materialized in its place. “Let’s dance, Adachi!”

Adachi hated how cocky you were getting. You didn’t stand a chance against him. He had to crush that semblance of hope. “Shut up…! Get lost! Get the hell outta my sight!!”

“Nope.” You mused. “Let’s go, Isolde…!” Upon channeling your persona, you summoned a protective barrier around the group.

The first strike to him was your Maragidyne. Adachi was hit with a large blast of fire. Not only did you make the first move, it showed your blazing resolve. It cemented the fact that you were serious about fighting him. There was no holding back in this battle.

The adrenaline rush you got from battle flowed through your veins. It was the perfect outlet for all the frustration you had at Adachi’s betrayal. The anger you had over opening up and giving him your heart, of which he took for granted. Also hitting him was just pretty satisfying.

The fight was long and arduous. As much as you hated him, Adachi was a formidable opponent. In order to defeat him, you had to give it your all. Each attack you made was powerful, with smooth and fluid movements. It truly was a dance for the fate of the world.

The others jumped in with their own attacks. Each move weakened Adachi slowly but surely. His strikes were painful to endure, but you and Yukiko had spells to keep everyone at peak performance. You could keep this up forever, but could he?

It wasn’t before long, Adachi’s figure was starting to wane. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, his strength was dwindling. He was losing. His change in demeanor didn’t go unnoticed by you. In fact, it gave you a burst of energy. It was confirmation for you to keep going so you could finally end this once and for all.

A series of attacks followed your observation. Rise had pointed out Adachi’s state, and everyone in your group sent a fury of attacks. It was time to wrap this up.

It was only a few minutes longer into the fight that Adachi had grown weaker. Upon letting his guard down, there was a moment of weakness, and you took it. You sent the final blow. “Once more…!” A fire blast escaped your persona’s hands and hit the man.

That was it. He stumbled back before dropping to his knees. He was defeated. Adachi visibly grimaced, wincing as he held his shoulder.

“D-Damn… this is lame…” He grumbled as he grit his teeth. “Ngh… oh well…”

“Our world’s gonna disappear soon, no matter what… I didn’t have anywhere to go back to anyways… Everyone’s gonna become Shadows…” He chuckled before being met with a surge of pain.

To your dismay, beating Adachi didn’t completely solve everything. If only it had been that simple. It turned out he was a conduit for the true culprit behind the phenomena, Ameno-sagiri. It had been called upon due to the desire for mankind to live in ignorant bliss. Since they desired for the absence of truth, they would become shadows and live in the darkness of the fog.

You didn’t think you’d fight against a giant disco eyeball, but you did.

Upon its defeat, you opened Ameno-sagiri’s eye to the truth. You and the others showed the supernatural being the power of human potential. The fog was lifted over Inaba.

Once the being faded away, you approached Adachi, who was laying on the ground. You gently nudged the side of his arm with the tip of your stiletto. He’s still alive…

Adachi sighed as he stared at the sky. He was defeated. “So that’s it, huh…?” The world he wanted wasn’t going to happen.

“Fine… Live however you want…” He breathed out. It was clear he still had some lingering influence of Ameno-sagiri. His voice was rough and strained. “If you think… you have the power to change the future… then go right ahead…”

“I’m surprised you don’t know it’s very possible.” You raised a brow. Changing the future has been a believable concept since the dawn of time. Nothing is set in stone.

“Everyone has the power to do that.” Yosuke said in agreement.

Adachi let out a pained laugh. He wasn't sure why any of you were still around. Surely, you'd leave him to rot, right? “Get outta here… The Shadows will finish me off…”

“Just leave me be… you came to kill me in the first place… didn’t you…?” He stared at you and the group. He wouldn’t expect any less. He was a murderer who betrayed your trust.

“No, dumbass.” Kanji said to Adachi.

“You’re joking, right?” You held your hip as you glanced down at the man. Bending your knees, you crouched down next to him.

“You’re not getting off that easy.” From your pocket, you got out your handcuffs. With swift yet gentle movements, you took his arm and attached the restraint to his wrist. It was only fair Dojima got closure just as you did. Adachi needed to own up to his crimes as well. “I said I’d put you behind bars. Unlike you, I keep my promises.”

“Yeah, your stupid game’s over. We’re taking you back.” Yosuke said in agreement. “Live and face your punishment… that’s how it works in our world.”

“...Right…” Adachi didn’t move as you locked his hands up. There was a hint of humiliation he felt being put in restraints by you. It was the cherry on the bitter sundae of defeat. However, he couldn’t bring himself to resist anymore.

Naoto agreed with your wishes. “I’m sure that’s the outcome Dojima-san wishes for as well.”

As you kneeled close to the man, you glanced down at him. Amidst the momentary silence, he met your eyes. “We have the same power, but things turned out so differently for us…” Adachi muttered.

He wasn’t wrong. The two of you were in the same field, and granted the same ability, but that’s where your similarities ended. Like fire and water, you were complete opposites. While he succumbed to his loneliness and cynicism, you were optimistic and driven to your goals. Despite dealing with hardships, you managed to overcome and adapt. You had friends, family, and things to live for.

You were Adachi’s only gateway to a world of color. The exciting life he thought was long dead. He had a taste of it for a moment, and it felt nice… but then he ruined it. Foolishly, Adachi let his selfishness get in the way of his own happiness. He pushed the only person he cared about away. The woman of his dreams slipped out of his grasp, and he was the only one to blame.

Regret was seeping in through the cracks. “If only I had met you sooner… things wouldn’t have gone this way…” He whispered, his eyes softening.

Falling silent for a moment, you averted your gaze. “Maybe so…” You replied softly with a frown. Gently, you lowered his wrists about an inch. As much as you resented him for what he did, you did feel a small ounce of pity. It wasn’t an excuse, but you understood how he got here. “But I shouldn’t have to be the sole reason for you to change.”

You can’t magically fix someone’s problems overnight. Changing isn’t someone else’s responsibility, but your own. Change has to come from within. It wasn’t your job to save someone who can’t even help themselves.

“...Yeah, right…” Despite his begrudging acceptance, Adachi smiled weakly at you. His clarity arrived far too late. The damage was done, but his feelings persisted even now. In the fight he said he hated your resilience. In truth, it was one of the things he loved most about you.

After leaving the TV Realm, you were tasked with bringing him back to the station. You got into contact with Dojima and told him everything. Adachi was carefully taken into custody. As he was taken away by a stretcher at Dojima’s personal request, you didn’t speak any more words to each other.

The teenagers decided to go off and celebrate, but you hung back to go to the station.

Officers and civilians were coming and going through the Junes. As you walked out the glass doors, you were hit with a shining bright glare. What followed was a comfortable sentiment of warmth. Your eyes were shielded with your arm, and you slowly lowered it to glance up.

The sun was out. The fog was no more. It was a peaceful, sunny day. One that filled your senses with a feeling of tranquility. The light breeze gingerly swayed your locks as you stood there, admiring the sight. How long has it been since you’ve seen a clear day like this? Too long… A small smile crept up your cheeks.

Thanks to Adachi, you were back at square one. A single detective, able to return to the city and resume her life of chasing thrills and avoiding lows. However… that wasn’t entirely true. You grew a lot from this experience. Not to mention all the bonds you formed here during your time in Inaba. It made you appreciate living, whether it be materialistic or minimalistic. Thrills were fun, but sometimes tranquility was better.

Brushing the stray locks away from your face, you continued your walk to the station. Perhaps… you’ll stay here a bit longer.

haha totally not gonna use this as a blueprint for a persona game for girls hahahahahahaha whaaa???

anyways stan p4 detective y/n best mentor character

lowkey i wanted to do another part thats like aftermath interrogation stuff or ultimax or something but omg ultimax is longggg and id rather make my own persona type story instead hhhhh oh well maybe

divider: cafekitsune

consider following if you like my works :D

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#adachi tohru x reader #adachi x reader #x reader #x you #persona 4 #fem reader #x female reader #writing #fanfiction #fanfic #one-off writing

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the-empress-7 · 2 months

Note

You know how people say Catherine would be completely fine or probably better off if she didn’t marry William? Honestly, the same can be said about Meghan. I don’t know why she’s holding on to Harry at this point. (Well, perhaps love? lol) She could leave him, become the influencer she always wanted to be, or start whatever lifestyle blog or business she wants. Look at other former TV actresses who pretty much have the same level of fame Meghan had before Harry. Like Nina Dobrev, Dianna Agron, even Abigail Spencer. They attend fashion shows, travel, look glamorous enough on their instagram pages. If she didn’t marry Harry, she could probably be doing those things right now. Honestly I’m wondering if Meghan thinks Harry was even worth it. The princess experience of wearing a tiara, riding a carriage while waving to hundreds of people of the UK during their wedding was probably worth it though. I guess if it didn’t happen for her, she probably wouldn’t have been satisfied anyway and would always be wondering how high she could still go. Honestly I just kinda see Meghan right now as someone who had her dreams at the palm of her hands, but those dreams were thwarted somehow and she can’t get over the pain of losing them so she’s still somehow trying desperately to hold on to them.

Meghan wanted fame, and as a homely looking D list actress she had zero chance of attracting a A list actor. So she found a homely looking Prince instead.

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yoonieper · 1 year

Text

Pecattiphilia— Part 4 | PJM

Pecattiphilia is the sexual arousal from performing an act one believes is a sin.

✽ Pairing: Jimin x Reader

✽ Genre: Angel Au, angst, fluff, future smut, this is a slow burn (kinda?)!

✽ Rated: B for New Beginnings

✽ Series Warnings: This series will include discussion of religious aspects such as the afterlife and concepts of heaven and hell (There are no direct ties to any specific religion besides the mention of angels and demons— all aspects of religion was created by me for this series), this series includes a lot of violence (sometimes graphic depictions) and gore (nothing extreme, Jimin and the boys fight monsters sometimes), and mentions of sin (particularly revolving around sexual topics)

✽ Chapter Specific Warnings: The babies get a bit vulnerable in this chapter, flagellation, violent thoughts, violence (Jimin takes down some bad guys), things get a little gorey, nsfw thoughts wink wonk, things get a little heated ;)

✽ Word Count: 12k

✽ Summary: Jimin is sent to watch over you and as the years go by he gets more and more curious and sometimes just wishes he could get to know you. But he knows that’s forbidden, it's sin. However, a freak accident somehow causes Jimin and your eyes to meet for the first time with purpose. He knows it shouldn’t happen but he doesn’t want to break away. He wants you to look at him, wants you to touch him, wants you to be with him. The problem is none of this should have happened in the first place… what’s happening to him?

✽ Now Playing…: Sin City by Chrishan (slowed), Have Mercy by Chlöe, Blood Sweat and Tears by BTS, Lie by BTS (Jimin)

✽ Author’s Note: I’m so sorry for the wait guys… I posted about this in my last update, but parts 5 (maybe) and 6 (bigger maybe) I’ll try to get out this year, but next year I’ll be prioritizing series so this should get done sooner than the current pace! Idk if y’all noticed the slow burn, but things are just about to start getting interesting (hint hint part 6 is going to be fun) so please look forward to that~ I hope to post a more concrete schedule at some point so follow if interested 😘

No reposting, modifying. Translating is not allowed unless given explicit permission. Thank you so much :D

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You had to keep telling yourself that this was all just a dream. You knew it was, you had convinced yourself long ago that this was all in your imagination. One day you must have gotten so lonely your mind had managed to conjure up this beautiful angel to satisfy that crave for affection and your wish to be loved.

That still never stopped you from getting butterflies anytime Jimin would appear whenever you’d close your eyes.

It was pathetic, you knew it, but you never found yourself happier than when you were with him.

He found his way into your dreams pretty much every night. It was honestly more odd for him not to be there sometime during your slumber. After weeks began to pass, as crazy as it sounds, you really questioned at times if it was really all just a dream. How could this happen? Was it really possible to dream of the same person every single night?

You certainly didn’t think so and oftentimes questioned your own sanity. You might have actually lost it.

A quick search on the internet didn’t help your worries. You asked what dreams like this might mean and all that came up was a whole lot of cryptic bullshit about soulmates that you didn’t buy one bit. Honestly you believed the whole angel thing Jimin stuck with a lot more than that.

After you really never came to a conclusion you just decided to forgo the need for one and just enjoy the delusions while they last.

Each time you would be whisked away into some new fantastical date night with the angel. Sometimes you both would be frolicking in the fields while riding on the backs of unicorns, others you and Jimin would sit underneath the tree you first met and just talk about your day.

The longer it went on, the more you got used to it, and the more you needed him in your life.

It was a little strange. Despite the constant flirting that was seemingly happening between you two, besides the first time you met, things have remained almost strictly platonic. Jimin was your friend more than anything. Of course with you knowing it was a dream, you tried to take things a step forward but each time Jimin became standoffish. Instead of trying to force anything you kept it platonic as well.

Maybe Jimin was truly here to just be your friend.

That would be true but you knew it wasn’t. Jimin had made it clear he liked you and that your outings were dates that he took the time to meticulously plan. Yet still there was a notable distance, physically speaking, that sometimes had you doubting his proclamation.

Instead of thinking about that too hard either you just enjoyed your time with him. It was just a dream after all, no need to get caught up in messy labels and all that.

Jimin was just too nice to hang out with for you to care about the specifics of your relationship.

As long as he was with you, you were fine.

Just like today, Jimin had surprised you and swept you off your feet to whisk you away to the stars.

No this wasn’t a metaphor, a hyperbole, or any other rhetorical device, today you actually found yourself clinging onto the angel as he flew you up higher into the atmosphere.

You watched in amazement as the sky quickly turned from its normal light blue shade, gradually getting darker, before you both were in the vacuum of space.

It earned a quick reaction as your body instantly panicked about the logistics of it, but Jimin laughed, making you realize once again that this was all just a dream.

Just a dream.

Getting a true taste of Jimin’s speed, you managed to fly all the way to Saturn within the span of about 20 minutes. It was strange, the stars seemed to blur around you but you didn’t feel it at all. Things all seemed to be moving in slow motion as you admired the angel, him holding your attention more than the dark cosmos ever did.

On the way over you would get quick glimpses of the passing planets, he would also point out distant constellations, promising to take you to far away lands one day.

You couldn’t believe all of this was somehow in your head.

He landed you both on one of the larger rocks that made up the planet’s rings and magically pulled out a picnic basket.

Only with Jimin would you ever have a picnic on Saturn’s rings.

You both talked and laughed as you ate the array of foods, jajangmyeon like you had been craving all day along with the sweetest tasting fruits you‘ve ever eaten.

The date was sweet and absolutely magical like any time you both would meet, however, unlike most other days you came to visit, something was different.

It was obvious in the silence that would hang for too long in between conversations, it was in the way your smile was never able to reach where it usually does, it was in the way that staring off into the cosmos tears would prick your eyes.

For some reason you knew Jimin knew that today just wasn’t your day and that you were pretending, but he never said anything, instead let the conversations fade into nothing and let you cry out silently.

“Is— is that a comet?” You couldn’t hide the shaking in your voice.

Jimin hummed lightly.

You laughed, you were starting to feel the tears start streaming down your face.

“It’s so pretty, from here it almost looks like any other star.” You were rambling, you knew that.

For a while both of you didn’t say anything after that, it just became harder and harder to keep your sobs quiet. All of a sudden Jimin sat up and propped his head up with his hand so he could face you.

His eyes made you flustered and you quickly tried to wipe your eyes, but he grabbed your wrist. You were confused at first but he used his other hand to wipe your cheek gently.

“There’s no need to pretend.” His voice was soft and instantly had more tears spilling from your eyes.

His words seemed to be all it took to break your wall of composure.

“It’s so stupid.” You sobbed and Jimin just continued to wipe away the tears.

“No it’s not, I promise.”

“I’m over here weeping like a baby just because shit didn’t go my way today, I should be paying more attention to other things, we’re in space for fucks sake.” You didn’t look good, you knew it. You just couldn’t stop crying, your face was hot, and you could quickly feel your nose starting to run.

Normally with guys you like you would never show this side of yourself, but things with Jimin just felt different, him being there with you made it so much easier.

Jimin didn’t say anything again and just let you cry, eventually pulling you into his arms. It was exactly what you wanted.

“You don’t need to justify anything, it’s fine to just be sad.” Jimin eventually reassured. “Besides, I think she was a bitch too.” He added with a smile.

At this he finally got you to smile. “Dambi’s so annoying, I try not to let her get to me but…” You chuckled as you wiped your eyes.

The reason for your sadness was nothing more than a difficult day with a coworker, one who’s known notoriously around the office as just being awful. She’ll ridicule, call you names, and do anything to get under your skin. Most of the time you were able to avoid her, but your boss had you working together today and as soon as you got here with Jimin, for some reason you just couldn’t take it anymore.

Jimin continued to stare at your face and occasionally brushed away a stray tear.

“What does it feel like?” He asked absentmindedly. You looked over at him confused and you were shocked to see his eyes meeting your own.

“What do you mean?”

“To be sad, to cry. What does it feel like?” His tone was genuine, he looked at you like he was almost amazed. You couldn’t be more confused, he sensed this.

“I don’t get sad like you do. I feel down sometimes but even after looking over so many people I can never quite understand what it feels like to get to that point where water starts pouring from your eyes and you just…” Jimin turned to face the stars.

“Let it out, the pain. I don’t feel anything.” His voice was quiet, like he didn’t want you to hear.

You were waiting for the punchline, the joke, anything to indicate he wasn’t serious, but Jimin’s smile began to fade.

“I want to cry with you, to feel what you do.” He sighed.

At this point you knew he was being serious.

“You can’t cry?” You asked, sitting up.

Jimin shook his head.

“I don’t get sad like you do. It didn’t really matter in the past, but I feel like I can’t comfort you properly. I don’t know what you’re feeling.” He mentioned. Saying it out loud made it obvious the reason why.

He was not designed to be put in a situation like this. All he needed to do was watch his humans from afar, he was never supposed to interact with them.

You laid back down on the blanket, making sure to snuggle into his arms extra tightly.

“So angels can’t cry? You learn something new everyday.” You tried to joke but looking up at Jimin’s face, you knew it was more than that.

“It’s not just that… I don’t feel anything like you do.” You looked at him shocked. For some reason your mind went to how your relationship really hasn’t progressed anywhere. Maybe this might be the reason.

“All I know is what I feel for you, but even that seems so foreign.” Jimin furrowed his brows at the mention of it. It took him a minute to realize that he had said that out loud and what that must have sounded like to you.

“This probably doesn’t make any sense to you, I’m sorry space does this to me.” He tried to laugh off but you weren’t having it.

“Talk to me.” You finally said.

“I’m not really supposed to, besides you don’t even think I’m real.” Jimin had tried his best to convince himself that he was fine with you just thinking he was a dream, but the more time he spent with you the harder it was. He wanted you to think he was just as real as everyone else.

“Humor me, or at least with what you can tell me. Let’s pretend you were real, that an angel for some reason is visiting me in my dreams every night. What’s going on?” You were truthfully interested.

Jimin smiled at this and laid back down. “I’m not supposed to be here.” He put it plainly. “I’m risking a lot trying to see you.” Despite his words, he held that faint smile on his face.

“I’m not designed to feel anything. I take orders, see them through, and protect. I’m not made for anything else. It’s making things complicated on my end, because during my time with you, I’ve never felt like this.”

You couldn’t stop the way your heart nearly beat out of your chest.

“But, that’s a problem.” He quickly added.

“Why?” You tried not to sound worried, for some reason you wanted Jimin to like you, feel that same flutter that you did every time you met in your dreams.

He looked over at you. “I shouldn’t feel anything for you, yet here we are. Alone together on Saturn’s rings.” He chuckled weakly.

“What is that supposed to mean?” You pushed even further.

“That I must be broken.” The words seemed to linger in the vacuum, a weird mix of emotions was going through your head and Jimin knew about every single one.

He knew how off putting you thought it was that refer to himself as broken at the thought of him having feelings for you but he also knew how excited you got at him being open and honest with you.

Did you really feel this way for him? He could feel your heart beating out your chest, he could even feel the butterflies dancing inside you. Within a month’s time he’s managed to make you feel like this about him and it’s miles ahead of what he could ever feel for you.

He wants more, that even if he doesn’t feel those same emotions as you he could show you what he does feel is in his own way even greater. The fact he even felt anything for you was a miracle.

This was meant to be a solution, a way to be close to you without the repercussions of interacting with you in the normal plane, yet he’s somehow made everything worse. He wants you even more.

“Anyway enough about me, you wanted to talk about Dambi?” He tried to escape the questions and answers he knew you were looking for.

“Jimin we can’t just move on… you’ve been in my head before and I know you know what I’m thinking.” You sighed sitting up.

Jimin frowned.

“Y/n I don’t have answers for you, I’m sorry.” He was honest but also was lying. He shouldn’t be telling you any of this anyway.

“I mean… you literally said you have to be broken because of your feelings for me.” Your voice was shaky again. Jimin felt the pain in every syllable, he hurt you… again.

Instead of explaining himself he let the silence speak for him. What was there to say? It was true, he was broken.

“Jimin I don’t know what we’re doing, what this is between us, but… fuck, is it that bad you feel actually broken?” You tried to sound like it didn’t affect you, this was a dream for fucks sake, but it did, his words hurt.

Jimin didn’t say anything once again.

His silence made you think about the whole reason your brain contoured up this angel in the first place. You were so lonely and you knew no one wanted you. It’s what your last boyfriend proved to you, it’s what almost everyone in your life has proven to you.

All you were was just a pretty face and nothing more to people, over the years you’ve just accepted that fact and chose to be by yourself. People will come and go in life, no need to tie yourself down anymore— is what you used to tell yourself but if this month with Jimin has proved anything it is that you really were craving for more.

Did you really deserve it though? You thought this month together has been amazing, something you looked forward to everytime you would close your eyes, but for such a beautiful angel to think of any feelings that has sprung up as him being broken? Were you really that fucked up?

Were you really that unwantable?

“It’s fine, I’m fine. This is all just a fucking dream, none of this matters. I don’t even do relationships anymore so—” You tried to laugh at yourself but you could feel the tears running down your cheeks. Why were you getting so worked up over a figment of your imagination?

You sighed and laid back down to stare at the planet honestly waiting at this point to wake up. This was all so stupid, you felt so stupid.

It was then that you felt Jimin shift slightly on your right side, you didn’t really pay too much mind to it, honestly wanting nothing more than to be done with him, but suddenly he was on top of you and staring directly into your eyes.

“Is this what you want?” His voice was raspy as his hand came up to caress your cheek and he rested his head against yours. You felt your body come alive in a second, the words that have been bouncing around in your mind immediately forgotten.

“Is this what it’ll take for you to understand how much I want you?” His tone was very direct, he had to make sure you understood.

You were at a loss for words, too focused on how close his lips were to yours.

“You have to understand that I wasn’t made for this, I can’t give you everything you want.”

“Jimin…” you sighed, your body lighting ablaze under his touch.

“Y/n I don’t know what I’m doing I—“ You wrapped your legs around his waist to pull him closer.

You heard his breathing hick when you couldn’t possibly pull him even closer.

“Are you sure you want this?” Your lips grazed his cheek.

“Yes…” you sighed.

Jimin for some reason couldn’t accept that, instead he pulled back slightly and watched the look in your eyes as you started to remember. All the dates he fucked up that he started anew so you would like him, you even saw the first time he appeared in your dreams, the atrocious sight he let you see from his punishment for his sins.

He didn’t know how to do this at all.

“Y/n I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know how to do this at all.” He cried as he started seeing the tears return to your eyes. Jimin had no idea how to love you like he knew you wanted, the way you deserved.

He couldn’t, it just wasn’t possible.

“You don’t want this…” He sighed softly, using his hand to wipe away the tears.

Your attention focused on him but returned to his lips.

“We’ll figure this out, no one is perfect… we can learn how to do this right together.” You smiled up at him and he felt something inside him snap, a horrible burn on his wrist.

No one is perfect.

“Jimin I want you… please—“ You could hardly finish before you felt a pair of lips crash onto yours.

It was hurried, fast, a moment you had been waiting for since you laid eyes on him. His lips were so soft and you didn’t know whether it was the butterflies or was it a kiss from an angel that made your whole body tingle. It was electric, one that quickly had your body on fire.

You ran your hands over the soft fabric of Jimin’s shirt, your hands eventually making their way into his hair, needing to feel and be as close to him as possible.

It felt like everything was in slow motion, quick or one that lasted a century, you had no idea because all of a sudden you found yourself jerked awake and welcomed by your dark room once again.

You ended up laying there for a while trying to process everything. Really, what just happened?

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

Unbeknownst to you was the angel who was sitting beside you on the bed. He was not turned your way, instead a hand was ghosting over his lips, and his eyes were wide as he stared down at the ground in horror.

His other hand toyed anxiously with the chain that hung around his neck, it serving as a reminder of the sin he’s just committed.

It was never supposed to go this far, he never wanted it to go this far.

Jimin had now crossed a line he knew can’t come back from.

His attention turned behind him to see you a little confused, your face still wet from tears but he could see it on your face and feel the giddiness as you thought about the dream.

You kept replaying the moment again and again in your head, you couldn’t remember everything exactly except the warmth you felt when your lips met. What to you was just a dream was as much a reality for Jimin and he could remember every detail.

How it felt to have your body so close to his, how beautiful you looked underneath him, how your lips felt against his, and how much, despite how every part of his body burned from the sin, he wanted to do it again.

That was the very first time, at least in this life, he had ever kissed someone.

In the past he’d get confused at the strange emotions his humans would feel whenever he’d watch them kiss the person that their heart longed for or that they craved for a night of passion. It seemed like such a strange practice to feel such powerful emotions for. Lips touching lips, in the past he would get disgusted and would need to turn away, but more recently the sentiment would confuse him more than anything.

Even though Jimin was only empathizing slightly, the powerful emotions of a kiss would be enough to give him butterflies occasionally.

The last human he watched over, John— he could never forget that moment when he finally kissed his long-time crush, Ana, the girl he had a crush on since high school, who eventually became his wife. Back then that moment was enough to make Jimin blush, a deep dark desire of wanting to be in the moment, Ana had been so pretty under the moonlight that night and the explosion of love John felt in that moment made it hard to look away.

Jimin couldn’t help imagining himself standing in the place of his human, what it would feel like to hold someone that close and—

Jimin that day had to repent for the first time. Normally he was so clean, an occasional visit back to heaven would be enough to suffice for any minor sins, but that burning he felt just like now was hard to ignore so he did what he needed to. It worked back then but this time…

Jimin couldn’t even explain the symphony of feelings he felt. It was as if the most turbulent piece of music exploded into the fiercest of crescendos, a heavenly melody played in his ears as your lips moved against his. It was like kissing the purest of light in a world that was frozen, barren, and dead. You were so warm, so inviting, he was deprived, so so deprived of that warmth, it physically hurt him to pull away from your embrace.

What might it have felt like to be even closer? What new colors of emotions would he have experienced if he continued?

Jimin knew them all, colors that is, and he could see every possible ray imaginable. But with you he felt like he was looking at a masterpiece painted with all new parts of the spectrum that had only been created around you.

He wanted to see more. He wanted more.

That very thought made him feel so dirty. What has he become? Someone so easily lured into temptation? Has he really become that weak?

He turned around to you again this time his eyes filled with disgust. How dare you do this to him?

He got up and started pacing around your room.

Maybe if you knew what you were messing with you would stop. He could appear right here, right now in your room and set the record straight. He could yell at you for ruining him, he could scream all he wanted, but at the end of the day, as much as he wanted to convince himself that it was all your fault, he knew he was even more guilty.

It was Jimin that made the decision to visit you in your dreams, it was him that would always come back, it was him who was broken.

Jimin looked back at you again, you were mindlessly scrolling on your phone. You had thrown off the covers (a result of the dream) to reveal the oversized shirt you had worn to bed. You paid no mind to the fact that it had ridden up to reveal enough skin that made the burned words on his skin set ablaze all over again.

You tempted him to sin so easily and he hated it. He hated you. He didn’t want to but you were getting in the way of him performing his duties properly and his work meant everything to him.

No human has managed to make him travel this far down into sin, any burning he would ever feel would be enough to remind him of his place.

Why did it have to be you, the human he watches over to tempt him so much? You of all the humans?

It was so clear that there was something going on, a problem he needed to get checked out the minute he started to feel the flutter whenever you happened to meet eyes unknowingly. There was no reason to hate you but his eyes couldn’t tear away from your legs and how much a part of him wished you would shift a little so he could see more, he couldn’t stop the sinister feelings from erupting in retaliation.

Jimin looked down at the cross around his neck, a symbol of his allegiance, and he knew the best course of action was to just get out of here. He needed to get out of here.

He flew out your window and zoomed away without a destination in mind, he just needed to be away from you.

His head was spinning, the farther he got away from your apartment the more his heart was pulling him back to you and he fucking hated it.

Jimin found himself flying over a forest. His head at this point was starting to hurt so he just decided to stop and breathe.

Jimin sighed as he felt the soft blades of grass on the soles of his feet. He knew no one was out here for miles so he allowed himself to phase into the normal plane.

He would never normally do this when he was a guardian, but this just adds to the list of things that Jimin would never do before but for some reason these days doesn’t care about.

The birds chirped, the sounds of nature were almost deafening but the orchestra of life proved to be comforting in this moment. Jimin just hoped it would finally ground him.

He took a seat against a tree and tried to close his eyes to enjoy the peace and quiet.

He tried to focus on his awareness of the animal life around him; the bird that was on the tree next to him, the ant that was crawling through the grass behind him, the deer that had heard him come down and had run away.

He hoped this would be enough but even then all he imagined was your lips against his while his hand pushed up that oversized shirt you had to wear. What made it worse was that he knew you weren’t wearing anything, how easy it could have been to feel you if he had the chance.

His mind also couldn’t get over how you said you wanted him, you wanted him despite knowing the fact it was clear he didn’t know how to do this, how he lied to you, and you still don’t even remember the fact he erased whatever incident caused Jimin’s fall into temptation. Maybe if he told you you wouldn’t want him anymore?

Maybe things would be easier to get over if he knew you didn’t want him the same way. He knew how much you wished he was real, he knew that every time you go out you would search for the ‘mystery man’ who occupied your dreams. Your desire was making it harder to pull away.

But he wasn’t human and he was not meant to give in. His job was to be your protector and that was it. The fact that he was clearly defective was not only putting himself at risk, but more importantly putting you and his whole team at risk.

What if they found out he was defective? What would they do to them?

Jimin without thinking tugged off his shirt to reveal the gold letters across his skin blackened out with the sins he’s committed. The sight was appalling and made him sick to even think he could get to a point like this.

He hurriedly pulled out his handle and turned the dials, emerging from one side was a small whip that separated into nine different ends.

He needed to repent, harder. So much was at risk if he didn’t get it together.

Jimin got on his knees and clung to the tree in front of him. He didn’t hesitate in bringing the whip down as hard as he could.

He cried out as his grip on the tree tightened. Jimin once again was reminded he was insane, because in that moment all he could think about was you and how much he wanted to kiss you again.

Jimin quickly brought the whip down again.

He had to get past this.

You should stop lying to yourself.

I’m not.

You’re becoming corrupted.

No, I’m fine.

Do you want her still?

So, so badly.

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

Jimin had been watching you trying to bake a recipe your sister had sent you earlier that week of the chocolate magic cake she made you the last time you saw each other.

He had been fawning over how cute you looked trying to make each layer perfect. You had been stuck on the second layer for ages and for some reason Jimin enjoyed seeing how much effort you were putting into this measly dessert.

You were so cute.

Jimin had been so distracted that when he was getting the notification he was late to his team’s monthly meeting he was scrambling, trying to reach for his halo and rushing inside.

He was not surprised to find everyone’s eyes on him as he rounded the corner to their meeting room. Immediately the scorched words on his thigh sent a shearing pain in leg.

‘Guilt.’

To make matters worse, Jimin had never been late to a meeting before.

The silence that hung in the air was loud and made his skin crawl. Considering what he told them the last time they saw each other, he could tell that’s all they were thinking about to be the reason for his untimeliness.

What was even worse was that they were right. It had everything to do with his feelings for you.

Jimin took a cautious seat in his assigned spot, everyone’s eyes following him as he moved. As soon as he sat down the sting on his back served as a reminder that his plan of repentance had been a failed journey so far. Everyday he went back out to that same forest and tried his best to force these urges and desires out of him.

With how today went it was obvious he needed to work harder.

Has the burn of sin not been enough yet?

The only thing it had managed to do was convince him to not visit you for the last few days, but each and every day he missed you dearly and wanted to continue where you last left off.

Jimin could tell all of them wanted to ask where he was, what could have possibly kept him from their meeting. He could have easily lied and said he got caught up with a demon. He seemed good at doing that these days, but he couldn’t lie to them.

Instead Jimin wallowed in his guilt as Namjoon finally broke the silence to finally start the meeting.

“Anyway, I wanted to start off this meeting by saying the higher ups have informed me that we’re to be dispatched on a mission in 2 days time. I thought it would be good to go over the details before going over our reports.” Namjoon got up so he was standing at the head of the table, everyone’s attention now was all on him.

A hologram appeared in the middle of the table to reveal a building and a face. To any human it wouldn’t look like anything much but for Jimin’s team and any angel really this was an obvious case of a class 2 demon.

“This is Abigor— a demon that’s recently managed to escape from H.E.L.L.”

“What? Abigor escaped?!” Hoseok exclaimed.

“I know, we still don’t know how he managed to make it past the gates with how many people were looking for him, but he did and we only just now have gotten word that others escaped with him.” The hologram changed to footage collected from the outside of their fortress, with more class 2 demons patrolling the area.

“Holy— how did that many get out?” Taehyung asked, confused, everyone was.

“We have no idea, but it seems he’s managed to grow his legion even more since he’s escaped to earth. Some of the demons we’ve observed have been on our missing list for ages.” The hologram pulled up the few profiles they had managed to identify.

“This isn’t good.” Seokjin sighed.

“We’re hoping it looks worse than what it is in actuality, but that’s the reason we’re being dispatched so suddenly, to hopefully take care of this problem quickly and quietly.”

“Of course they send us to fix their fuck up.” Seokjin added, with an exaggerated eye roll. Everyone was a little annoyed this had happened.

“I feel like there’s been more and more of these cases happening, demons managing to get past the P3 angels patrolling the gates. It doesn’t make sense.” Yoongi pondered.

It was weird, in all the time they’ve been awakened they’ve never had this many calls for missions.

“I’ve heard the P3 angels have been complaining to the higher ups. They think something is happening and have been requesting backup.” Namjoon added.

“Well, whatever is happening hopefully they get it under control soon. I’m tired of dealing with all these calls plus being on guardian duty.” Jungkook sighed, leaning back further in his chair.

“Do you think we can convince the higher ups to give us another break after we all finish?” Seokjin chuckled and the others all joined in.

“At this point, they have to give us some type of break. We’ve been working overtime…” Jungkook tried massaging his temples, but the fatigue just wasn’t going to go away that easily.

“C'mon guys, we’re angels, we can’t get tired. Enough about how we feel, our jobs are the priority.” Namjoon tried to pep up spirits but for some reason there was a sudden uneasy shift in the room.

“Anyway I thought I would wait to hear the reports but it’s probably best to just get this over with before we need to start discussing our strategies. We don’t have as long as we like so we’ll probably be here for a while.”

Silence continued to pass for a while, everyone waiting for someone to say something first.

“I’ve gotten my zero.” Seokjin was the first to say.

“Already?” Namjoon chuckled, a little surprised.

“Don’t you guys remember I had the guy in the Lemian war?”

Everyone awed, it suddenly all made sense.

“He lasted a lot longer than I was expecting. I’m still a few months out, but I have my date and time.”

“That’s good— what are your projected numbers?”

“Better than average, since I knew I likely wouldn’t have much time with him I made sure to be extra careful in keeping him as pure as I could. I can’t say anything conclusive yet but I’m hoping to end with a 3.8~”

They all ooed at the number.

“Good job.”

“He’s a good kid, made things a little easier for me. I’m at a 3.6 right now, but I’m confident I can bring that up to .2 before zero hits.”

Jimin had managed to maintain you at a 3.9… the highest was 4. It used to be higher but because of the day Jimin randomly fell into your apartment, leaving you unprotected for 12 hours, his 3.96 went down. Stats like that without a zero were unheard of.

“Great, please make sure to make your final reports to the higher ups a little more detailed. You know how they get when our numbers get too high.” Seokjin nodded at Namjoon’s words, understanding the procedure.

“What about everyone else? What are your current numbers?”

The boys started to go through normal report procedures, going through a general telling of the last month plus their current numbers and projects and ambitions for the next month. Jimin usually enjoyed hearing what his team’s been up to since they parted ways, but at the mention of their humans his mind was suddenly back to you once again and the guilt of his sins.

How could he face them right now?

He felt like such a failure. His team had an image to upkeep, if anyone were to find out that Jimin— the same Jimin who would roll his eyes at the shear mention of a P2 angel fooling around with a human— had gone on to break so many rules to kiss the human he was assigned to protect…

And with all he wanted still despite everything was to see you and kiss you again. He wanted it so bad, he wanted to show you how excited he was to finally call you his. What if you thought he didn’t want you anymore?

The thought alone was laughable, if only you knew how much work he tried to get you out his head only for you to be back within seconds—

“Jimin?”

At the mention of his name he finally looked up to see everyone staring at him.

“What’s wrong with your face…? It’s like… all red right now.” Taehyung asked what everyone was thinking.

“Are you ok? You’ve been acting strange since you got here.” Yoongi glared at him suspiciously.

“I swear Jimin if this has something to do with Y/n…” Namjoon groaned, already sensing where this was about to go.

Tell them.

Jimin looked up to see their concerned faces staring at him, waiting for him to say something and if the guilt was bad before, under their gaze he couldn’t possibly have felt any worse. It was the closest he ever felt to bursting into tears.

“I’m sorry.”

“Jimin what the fuck have you done.” Namjoon groaned, already sensing he was going to hate what Jimin was about to say.

See.

And so he told them everything. He told them about the night that started this whole ordeal, how he suddenly transferred to the normal plane right in the middle of your living room. He told them about the weird effect it had on him and that’s why he had to bless you. He told them how even after the beatings from the higher ups wasn’t enough to sway him and he had been meeting you in your dreams. He even told them about the kiss you shared the last time you saw each other.

Jimin would always picture their faces before he would go into your dreams, how they would react if they knew what he was doing.

Nothing could have prepared him for the reality.

It was silent for a while after he finished, but their faces said more than any words ever could.

They’re disappointed in you.

They should be.

The silence was broken by Namjoon slamming his hand on the table, noticeably startling everyone.

“Jimin, what the fuck did we talk about?!” He was furious, that same disappointed tone Jimin knew he was waiting for him.

Maybe this is exactly what he needed, the people he cared about the most to look at him as crazy as he felt at times.

This is what he needed but it still hurt so much knowing his worst fear was becoming a reality.

“Jimin I know what we talked about last time, I only let it slide because I thought this wouldn’t interfere with your job, that this was a problem you could deal with!” Namjoon exclaimed, baffled he was hearing this from him. This wasn’t the same Jimin who he’s known for eons.

Namjoon looked around at everyone in the room, before running his hands through his hair.

“Jimin, I’m trying to figure out why you didn’t report this to anyone beforehand.” Namjoon tried to calm down.

What was his excuse, did he have one?

Jimin continued to stare down into his lap, unable to meet the eyes of anyone in his team.

“At first I was scared they would separate me from her and I thought I had things under control enough to make it to her zero…” Everyone in the room just sighed, the excuse not enough to beat all the protocols that have been seared into their minds. There was a system, an order, and to forgo everything that they learned just for some human…?

“It was only recently when things got out of control. When she looked at me…” Jimin couldn’t help but smile when he remembered opening his eyes up to see you worriedly staring down at him. Despite how awful he felt, you, having you there was worth any pain he felt.

“That moment right there, everything changed. I never wanted to go back, I didn’t want to be invisible to her anymore. I want her to know me, I want to know her–”

“Jimin, you know that’s not possible. You’re an angel! You’re not even meant to be having these feelings. She’ll grow old and die, you won’t! How would that ever work–”

Jimin suddenly slammed his hand on the table. Everyone’s attention returned to him and they all could see the scary look in his eyes. It was frightening, something they had never seen before in someone that was normally so sweet.

It was horrifying.

“Please do not talk about her like that.” Jimin said calmly, yet the dark look in his eyes made everyone in the room glance around at each other worriedly.

This wasn’t good.

“She wasn’t my only reason.” Jimin continued, finally meeting the eyes of his team.

“Something is clearly wrong with me, I was– am worried. What if they find out they can’t fix me…”

It was dangerous, a defective angel especially when it comes to them interacting in the normal plane is something no one in any division wants.

It is a procedure to deal with the issue as quickly as possible– if it’s determined you can’t be fixed, you’re “fired,” which everyone knows is just another term for forced retirement. To make matters worse, a team’s fate is largely determined by the well-being of every member.

The process of picking team members is very delicate, if that balance is off put by the removal of one member the success of a team is reduced by an astronomical amount. Unfortunately in most cases a team that has lost a member due to a battle lost or being “fired” the whole team meets their demise soon after.

“I can’t let whatever is wrong with me put you guys in danger.” Jimin was being earnest. He couldn’t stand knowing that it was because of him his whole team ended up meeting horrible fates.

Jimin would be a little more optimistic about seeing someone about his issues, but he strongly believed at this point they would think his sins are too great and consider him unredeemable.

There was something inside him telling him there wasn’t some magical way to fix whatever is happening, and if they find out he’s so defective he somehow managed to fall to the normal plane unwillingly, they probably wouldn’t even give him a discharge ceremony to hurriedly make sure he didn’t cause anymore issues.

“I understand Jimin, but what about those we swore to protect. If there is something wrong with you and something ends up happening….” Joon tried to reason.

“All I ask is for your understanding until I take Y/n to get judged. I promise, the minute after I will see if there might be a problem.” Jimin was begging at this point. As much as he worried about his brothers’ fate, the thought of being reassigned and not getting the chance to ensure you were ok was too awful.

“And what if something happens in between then?! It might be different if you had your date but that could be decades.” Joon was getting angry again.

As the argument continued Yoongi noticed the blackened out letters on Jimin’s wrist.

“What if you end up becoming corrupted?” Yoongi suddenly said, interrupting the heated debate.

Jimin suddenly looked scared.

Yoongi pointed to his wrist.

Fueled by anger, Namjoon walked around the table and hastily pulled up Jimin’s sleeve. Everyone around the table gasped seeing the letters blackened out.

“Take off your shirt.” Joon took a step back.

Jimin didn’t even argue as he pulled the shirt over his head.

If all the bruises that painted his skin weren’t alarming, the words that were normally barely visible looked more like tattoos than what they truly were meant to be, reminders. They were meant to be reminders to keep him in line, to ensure that he didn’t stray far off the path, something since he had awakened had presented as a problem.

Jimin had been told by Celine and Atara that he was more susceptible to becoming corrupted for some strange reason. Despite their warnings, Jimin had remained one of the most untainted P2 angels of the sector, that was, well till he started watching over you.

“Jimin, you need to understand, we’re just worried about you. This does not look good at all.” Yoongi sighed, seeing that all the words he had on his chest were just as black as the one on his wrist.

“Please… just until I can take her to get judged.” Jimin looked around at everyone and he was faced with their concerned stares.

Joon took a seat at the head of the table, thinking and running through what would be the best way to proceed with this.

“Yoongi do you have any idea what could be causing the symptoms Jimin described.” Joon sighed, leaning back in his chair, one that stood apart from the others. It was bigger, grander, and posed more authority.

Yoongi was one of the few P2 angels who took the time to become a trained medic. Celine and Atara had noticed he might possess the rare skill, usually only reserved for P1 angels. Yoongi had stayed behind one of their few breaks and learned and mastered the skills needed to care for his team.

If anyone might have any idea what this could be, it would be him.

“Forcefully dropping to the normal plane? Feelings for humans? None of these are symptoms of anything I can identify. Maybe a P1 angel might have a better idea, but without the proper resources I can’t help you.” Yoongi said, analyzing how upset Jimin seemed.

Namjoon sighed again.

Procedure, what he should do is stick to the procedure and get his friend the help he clearly needed, but, but Jimin was right. There was no telling what might be causing these mysterious symptoms, what if he ends up putting his whole team at risk.

Namjoon’s job as the leader was to look after the wellbeing of each and every one of his team members. Knowing that all the help Jimin might receive could be forced retirement as well as the entire team’s downfall made him doubt his immediate reaction.

“Does anyone have any opinion about what we should do?” Joon asked, opening up the floor to anyone.

The room was silent for a while.

“I trust what you think is best. There’s risks no matter what we choose to do.” Jungkook mentioned and everyone just nodded. There really wasn’t a right answer here.

Namjoon sat back in his chair and stared up at the white ceiling, trying his best to organize his thoughts.

“Jimin, I won't report this.” Namjoon could hardly believe his own words. Maybe there was something wrong with him as well.

“I’m hoping, I’m hoping whatever might be causing this is something that might go away after you take Y/n to get judged. The minute, and I’m serious Jimin, the minute anything out of line begins happening– I’m sure everyone at this table will understand that it would be better to get you the help you need.” Joon laid out.

As much as he knew, he knew that he should just follow the protocols— the minute one of his team members or himself start acting strange he was immediately meant to take them to get evaluated. It was as simple as that, yet he couldn’t bring himself to possibly risk his teammate in order to figure out what the issue might be.

Jimin visibly looked relieved.

“Thank you so much.” Jimin looked Namjoon right in the eye, knowing he was going out of his way for him.

“No– Jimin on the condition of letting this go unreported, you’re ordered not to continue seeing Y/n in her dreams unless it’s an order from the higher ups. This is the only time I’m letting this go and to me it seems she’s the reason for your fall from grace. If you want to continue to be her guardian then these are the terms you must agree to.” Namjoon spoke seriously.

“Wait what–”

“It’s either that or we’re going to MP1s immediately.” Namjoon laid out. It was more than a compromise Jimin deeserved at this point, but Namjoon was too nice sometimes.

Everyone around the table nodded in agreement, seeing that also as more than fair.

Jimin wanted to protest but all he did was slump in his chair, mumbling a quiet ok.

Namjoon nodded, still clearly stressed, but relieved they seemed to be on the same page. But they weren’t, Jimin was experiencing more emotions he had never felt before.

Rage, he was seething to himself as the leader tried to direct the meeting into going over the plan for their upcoming assignment.

Jimin could hardly pay attention, he was so furious.

Anger was a very human emotion, one that always seemed so foreign to Jimin and really any angel. Anything that seemed like anger was normally an extremely dulled down version of what humans experience (much like any resemblance of emotions they feel).

It would take an astronomical event to make a being of his nature as upset as humans would get at the tiniest of issues and yet the thought of his leader banning him from seeing you was all it took for suddenly this new fiery shade of the emotion to manifest.

A word right on his chest burned with an intensity that Jimin struggled to keep it together during the meeting.

Fury.

It was horrible, the leader he respected so much being the target of such a nasty emotion. Jimin could hardly believe the images his mind conjured up in retaliation.

His handle was in his pocket, how easily he could have charged at the leader, quickly turning the dials on his handle to form a knife to demand the leader to take it back. Even worse, he imagined using it as well, hoping to make the leader pay for even suggesting never seeing you again.

Rage or any type of anger should never be experienced by someone who, in the name of such emotion, could destroy worlds or even the universe entirely.

The fact this emotion even managed to manifest in his mind made Jimin seriously consider following through with Namjoon’s order. Maybe he was right, everything in his life did get worse the minute he started getting close to you.

He should heed his leader’s warning.

Somehow he managed to make it through the meeting, but he needed to make a promise with himself in order to study the details once again. He hardly was able to pay attention.

Instead of going back through the way inside their home base of operations, they decided to walk through H.E.A.V.E.N. hoping the walk to the gateway would be enough to settle the tension that still lingered after the discussion earlier.

On the way, Yoongi said he needed to stop by the MedBay, so the rest of the boys waited in the common area for him to come back.

“Do you guys remember when we looked like that?” Namjoon asked as he looked over to the team of five practicing drills. It was a redundant question considering they all can remember everything that took place in their lives since the moment they awakened, but Namjoon’s question did make everyone in the group smile seeing the boys in front of them.

They all knew them, deemed TXT on the leaderboards, the team of five were a group who awakened some time after their group did. They were a group who were often compared to their own in the means of potential. They were still relatively young, but despite that their stats were remarkable compared to those who awakened around a similar timeframe.

Despite this new emotion still bouncing around in his head, the sight even made Jimin smile as he recounted his group doing the same when they were still up and coming.

The more he looked though, the more he noticed something strange.

As the group went through their drills, he noticed they were following the standard order of procedures exactly as Celine and Atara had instructed when they were still being trained.

They seemed almost robotic as they wrapped up their drills. The other members trailed behind their leader, in a perfect straight line like they had been advised. It was strange seeing the methodical way that they put away their equipment, they followed every procedure they were advised.

The members all saluted to their leader, perfect posture, heel toe, heel toe— they were perfect as they walked away from the training area.

Those unfamiliar with their sector might just figure for the young team to be possibly trying to show off for their higher ups, but one glance around their sector and everyone acted that way.

Everyone that walked past them followed their leader, mirroring their actions perfectly, anyone flying above them flew just like the leader guiding them through the halls.

Back when they were still training Celine and Atara always told them after Namjoon was assigned the role of guiding their team that the leader was the soul of their team.

Their team used to be just like everyone else. A few eons ago Jimin would have never been able to escape Namjoon sending him to the MP1s, a few eons ago he never would have asked in the first place.

So much has changed, it became more obvious the more he looked at how perfect everyone around him seemed.

Soulless, just drones carrying out orders, that’s what they were meant to be.

It was only recently that his team stopped following those procedures, they just seemed unnecessary. It was only recently that Namjoon stopped ordering the authority team leaders usually possess.

It was strange. Jimin could remember everything yet the moment his team disregarded the procedures wasn’t coming to him. It almost seemed like they were always like this, people who would easily joke and saw each other as equal parts of the team.

All faces that passed by remained expressionless, no smile, as they focused on making sure to follow their leader.

Even those that talked as they went by had nothing else to discuss other than their duties. What else was there to talk about really?

It seemed like just yesterday Jimin was probably the most pretentious angel around despite him not being a leader or a P2 angel, it was that fall from grace that made this whole situation seem so strange.

Has their team really changed that much? Has he really changed that much?

As much as he couldn’t remember being like this anymore, he knew his team followed these exact procedures up until recently but he couldn’t take off the rose colored glasses that told him otherwise.

Nothing was wrong, they were fine, everyone was fine.

Jimin looked over to his teammates and smiled.

Completely, 100 percent fine.

The procedures weren’t required anyway, they were just standard proceedings.

Yoongi came back soon after and they started flying over to the Drop room.

On the way he paid attention to everyone going by, none of them weren’t following the proceedings. Were they really that strange?

The concern started to become a little overwhelming, luckily they finally made it before it got too bad.

The room was like all the others, immensely white with gold detailing along the walls and vines streaming everywhere. What made it the Drop room was because it had a giant hole in the floor with thousands of angels going in every second.

“I trust you’ll listen to orders.” Namjoon said to Jimin as the group stared down at the warped view of Earth down below.

Jimin wanted to tell him to fuck off— a thought he would have never pictured being being directed toward his leader— but instead Jimin simply nodded, hoping that would be enough to stop himself from spilling out an unruly amount of profanities… or doing something worse.

“HB meeting at U##7:33– we’ll go over the details of the assignment once more and depart at U##23:33.” Everyone nodded at the leader's words. This is standard proceedings.

And with that, they flew down through the portal after a very awkward goodbye.

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

After Jimin arrived back by your side, this strange new emotion was not simmering in the way he hoped it would the minute he could get some space. If anything, seeing you cutely munching on that magic cake you finally managed to get right was just more fuel to the growing fire.

The minute he detected strange activity in the plane and he was faced with a gross giant sin in front of him. He decided that this would be the way he was going to express himself.

Purging sin would be a perfect form of catharsis.

Jimin couldn’t stop the sinister grin on his face as the tall, lanky, abomination with arms that dragged behind began charging at him.

The creature was mountains in height above him in this form, but Jimin loved the challenge.

It was just more to play with.

Jimin reached in his pocket and grabbed the handle, quickly turning the dials to have his angelic energy manipulated to form a sword. A classic choice, but he wanted to feel every slash he makes. A sword was perfect.

As Jimin quickly flew in to attack the creature Jimin couldn’t stop his mind from picturing the leader earlier and his orders to never meet you again.

He hated to admit that he knew Namjoon was just looking out for him and the team, but didn’t he hear the story Jimin told him? How he explained the moment you looked into his eyes, how much that changed him. The plethora of emotions, wishes, and desires he’s never experienced before all because you actually came into his life.

And he was only meeting you in your dreams? Was that really so wrong?

As much as Jimin wanted to believe what he was saying, what really was the true ignition of this flame was the fact Namjoon was right, painfully so.

Jimin’s changed so much in the short time since he fell into the middle of your living room. The scorched letters on his skin was enough proof of that.

He wanted to be right though, he wanted to continue meeting you with no consequences.

But that voice of his leader advising him on the right path just made him see red and it was all he thought above as he slashed the creature's legs, bringing it down with a horrifying shriek.

Jimin was easily able to immobilize the creature, and much like a tree in the forest, Jimin watched as its top half came crashing down from colossal heights onto the floor of the infinite white void.

Jimin made quick work of going for its arms, dodging any attempts at knocking him to the ground. Its ginormous hands were first, but that was not enough for him, he speedily flew around the creatures, slashing and cutting until its lengthy arms were reduced to just numbs.

Eventually Jimin flew so he was standing on the tiny torso of the creature. By now, black ooze had painted the white void and continued to pour out of its small appendages flailing around. Jimin was covered in it as well.

Some might be horrified at the sight, but each cut was exactly the remedy he needed in order to quell his anger toward his leader.

Namjoon and the rest of the team were the closest people he had in his life and ever will, it was probably the closest he will ever get to experiencing love.

It was nice knowing they cared and they were being more than generous in not taking him to the MP1s, he should be grateful.

Jimin flew up high before quickly soaring back down and piecing his blade through its horrid flesh. Jimin attacked it from the inside, not at all caring about the ooze and marveled at the horrible way it screamed for him and how his blade incinerated everything around him.

It was glorious.

When Jimin was done, the creature was hardly alive, only deepened sighs and ragged breaths filled the void. He easily could have finished him off that way, but he was feeling a little extra today.

Jimin got right in front of the creature's face and stared down at it with malice and disgust.

Pathetic.

Its head was way too tiny for its long body, it was always so strange to see that this was the manifestation of temptation.

Not in the mood to drag this out any longer, Jimin used his blade and with one swift, clean, cut across its neck the horrible noises finally stopped.

A clean beheading.

Jimin hurriedly stabbed his blade through the tiny head and that was enough for the creature– or rather, what remained of the creature– to disintegrate into ash, the purest form of what a creature like that could become.

He knew he was right in this helping him. He felt better already seeing the black covered ooze painting the void, knowing this nasty emotion was able to aid him in purging this evil from ever touching you.

Jimin smiled.

Pathetic.

I know.

That was not enough to stop you?

I’m sorry.

You’re not.

But–

Nothing good will come from this.

I love her.

You don’t know what love is.

…

I want her.

Want is not enough.

…

You disappoint me continuously.

Jimin shook the voice out of his head, choosing to ignore his other half. He had to stay a little longer and make sure not other creatures would show up. He wanted to hurry and get back to you.

He wanted to be selfish.

⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰

You were a little shocked later that night after crashing from eating all that cake earlier, to find yourself back in the beautiful meadow that you’ve found yourself in countless amounts of time this month.

Immediately after realizing you were finally having that dream again you quickly looked around to see if you could find him.

Jimin, where was he?

Like he’s proven too many times, it seems as if he heard your thoughts and suddenly you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around and you couldn’t stop yourself from immediately jumping into his arms.

He caught you, he always does.

You couldn’t stop yourself from bursting into tears the minute his hand came up to lightly stroke your hair, soothing you instantly at how hard it’s been not seeing him.

It was so dumb, you had spent the last few days sulking over a man in your dreams suddenly disappearing after a particularly strange last meeting.

He had been the reason for your sudden decision on baking that cake, hoping your sister’s recipe would be enough to soothe the ache your heart felt over an imaginary man. It was stupid, incredibly dumb, but having him here now made you realize how real your feelings for him were.

This was horrible.

“Jimin…” You sobbed into his light blue sweater, your grip a little too tight, worried you might lose him again at any moment.

“Did you really miss me that much?” He chuckled, but you noticed his strong grip on your waist.

You finally pulled away and looked up at your angel, and an angel indeed he was. He looked absolutely heavenly, his hair now a shade of blue matching his sweater, and his eyes now a dark blue akin to the waves of the ocean.

For some reason you could tell he seemed different.

“Where did you go?!” You exclaimed.

You had spent the last few days worrying that after the events of your last meeting was enough to drive him away entirely.

You worried if you might have been too bold, might have pushed him too much despite his concerns he voiced to you.

You couldn’t be happier to see him standing in front of him once again.

“I had a lot on my mind, but I’m here and I won’t leave you again.” The words made him smile but also guilt plagued his mind and body, the word on his thigh burning but he never faltered.

You looked him over and that’s when you noticed he was wearing gray sweatpants and lacked his luxury brand shoes now.

“Did you have a midlife crisis while you were gone?” You questioned and the accusation made Jimin think back to your first date (attempt).

Jimin sighed.

You can’t do this.

Shut up.

Jimin laughed lightly at your joke. “To be honest, I think this time I did.”

You were just joking, but the admission made you switch to actually being concerned. “Was it because of our last date?” You asked, worried you might have actually messed with your angel.

“A little.” He was honest. “But I just needed to figure out some things personally. Our date made me realize we were at a crossroad.”

“Crossroad?”

“I had been trying my best to avoid it over our time seeing each other, I know you noticed it as well, but seeing you think I don’t care about you couldn’t be the furthest from the truth and I had to do something.”

Your face warmed as you thought about it, his lips on yours and you noticed the way he smiled, getting a little shy at how vivid the picture was.

“Yes, that exactly…”

“Why did you want to avoid this?” You asked finally, curious where this was going.

“I already told you, I’m not really built for this type of situation. To be honest ever since we met I’ve been a little confused on how to handle all these new emotions you’ve allowed me to experience. I tried to dance around facing them until I could decide where I wanted this relationship to go.”

“Which is?” You couldn’t help trying to pry the information out of him. What did he decide?

“Either we never see each other again… or…” His gaze finally focused on your eyes and you thought you would end up feeling lost in those blue eyes.

Jimin wanted to tell you, tell you everything that has gone into making this decision. He’s going against everyone, all his higher ups, his team, H.E.A.V.E.N. itself just to see you and be with you, but as you looked up at him, for the first time in his life things just stood still. You were here in front of him and that’s truly all that matters.

His fate was sealed, the decision was made.

Instead of going on and on like he had prepared tonight about everything that has gone into making this decision, instead he just pulled you close and kissed you like he had been wanting to since you parted ways.

Your lips were so soft and he enjoyed feeling the peculiar way your heart sped up the minute you realized what he was doing. Everything about you was so sweet and soft and made the most complicated emotions do a dance inside him.

He loved this.

Disgusting.

He loved it even more.

Jimin never wanted to pull away, but eventually you did and his heart fluttered seeing how flustered you were.

“Well, what does that mean Jimin?” You asked breathlessly.

“It means…” He leaned in close. “You’re mine.”

Despite his attempt at trying to make you flustered, his words suddenly had images popping up in your mind about Jimin fucking you against the tree you both always sat under.

The word on his wrist burned, the ache doing its best to remind him of his place.

She wants you to touch her. What are you going to do about that?

It was like his other half was mocking him at the predicament. As much as he’s sacrificed continuing to be with you, that was still a boundary he would never be willing to cross.

Is she going to like that?

At this moment he wanted to smash his head in with a rock. He didn’t want to think about that right now and he didn’t want to tell you either, at least not yet. What if you don’t want this anymore?

You cleared your throat, trying to stop your wandering mind. It was enough to bring Jimin back from his own troubling thoughts.

“Oh yeah, this wasn’t the only reason I met with you.” Jimin finally said.

“Really?”

Jimin nodded.

“I wanted to tell you I will be leaving for a few days.” Jimin felt the way your heart sank at his words and he couldn’t help but laugh. You were so cute.

“You just said you won’t leave me alone anymore…” You pouted and Jimin hastily pulled you in a hug because how could one person be so cute.

“I have work to do…” He sighed, hating to separate so soon after such a big turning point for your relationship.

“Is my angel looking over others?” You asked curiously and you didn’t notice the way Jimin got red at the nickname.

It was what he was, it was like someone feeling all mushy over being called human. It was just in the way you said it, always with a possessive ‘my’ because he truly was yours.

“Nope, I’m yours and yours only. I have bad guys to take down.” He decided to tell you the truth, hoping that might interest you and immediately he could tell it did.

“Really?” You asked shocked like everyone did when they found out.

Jimin nodded.

“You’re gonna be ok, right?” That was a new one, usually most would rave in disbelief that such a soft soul could hurt anyone.

Maybe if most knew Jimin didn’t really have one anymore, or if they saw the way he could mutilate creatures like the one he did just before seeing you they wouldn’t be so surprised.

“I will.” He smiled at you.

“Promise…” Your voice was soft and he could tell you were a little embarrassed at your own words.

No one has ever worried for him. This was really new.

“I promise I’ll see you again on Sunday~” And his nonexistent heart couldn’t feel fuller.

“Sunday?” You giggled, finding the day all too fitting.

“I know it seems cliche, but I promise it’s just a coincidence.” He laughed along with you.

“Well then… If you really need to leave for a few days, can I have something to remember you bye?” You asked, but he didn’t even need to be able to read your thoughts in order to know what you were implying.

“Maybe that can be arranged…” He smiled before pulling you close once more.

He was really going to miss you.

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