#he really went for it but instead he ended up gay and also became a father
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Can we see the Alpha turning a couple of gay betas who used to be boyfriends into pussy obsessed straight bros?
Someone clearly saw my post about Alphas and sexuality. When I talk about Alphas I usually talk about them in general terms, since getting close and personal with an Alpha is practically begging to get turned into their beta. I usually don’t name names or get into specifics. But since you asked…
Meet Alvin and Benny. They’re boyfriends, or at least they were when this photo was taken. They used to be a loving couple. Alvin, the bigger one, loved to travel and dreamed of taking a trip to Paris. He was an outgoing, friendly guy who was always very kind. Benny, the shorter one, was slightly less social, being painfully shy. Still he had a good heart, loved to write, and once you got to know him he was the funniest person you’d ever meet. Alvin and Benny were great together, being an ideal couple. They brought out the best of each other and supported eachother in everything.
And then they met Cal.
Neither of them really remember how Cal came into their lives? Was he their new neighbor? No, that wasn’t right. Was he Alvin’s new coworker? That didn’t ring true either. Maybe he was Benny’s childhood friend who had come out of the woodwork? Whoever he was, he quickly integrated into their lives. It started off with small things, like skipping drag brunch with their other gay friends to hang out with Cal, or eating a salad instead of a donut because Cal suggested they try to eat healthier. But things escalated quickly, as they usually do with Alphas. Soon Al and Ben, as they now liked to be called, were working out like crazy because they wanted to keep up with Cal. They started talking differently, using words like bro and dude almost constantly, because Cal talked like that, and they were Cal’s bros. They quickly started to forget they were ever anything but Cal’s bros, his betas. Still, through it all, they stayed a couple. It was… weird. Cal was kind of impressed honestly. Usually by the time someone became a beta they lost all interest in relationships with anyone but their Alpha. But these two… they had hung onto it, despite everything. It was impressive… and it pissed Cal off. He didn’t mind that they were gay, but he fucking hated that they were still resisting him. He was their fucking Alpha, and they were his Betas. He should have complete control over them. But he was confident in his powers, like all Alphas are.
So he made a game of it.
He decided to see how far he could push them, how many changes they could handle while still being a gay couple. It wasn’t hard to increase their libidos, nor was it hard to give them an intense urge to fuck pussy. It took 3 months for the changes to finalize, and Cal found it hilarious to watch the two former fags slowly transform, how they’d insist they were gay while also bragging to eachother and Cal about all the pussy they were getting. How they were still convinced they were boyfriends when the closest they’d get to being intimate now is when they’d spit roast a bimbo together on their cocks. In the end there never was never an exact moment where they went from gay to straight. Overtime they just slowly forgot that that was what they used to be. They didn’t think about it anymore. Their relationship with their Alpha was far more important than their relationship with each other after all. And if their Alpha wanted two pussy obsessed straight douchebags, that was what he’d get.
Maybe Cal would let them be a couple again one day. Or maybe he’d make them both into his personal cock suckers. But for now Cal was happy to watch the former fags act like a couple of straight bros. All for him.
**Another Gay to Straight story, this time taking place is my ‘Alpha with a Capital A’ world. I love it when people ask me to expand on the stuff I’ve made, and I had fun writing this. Hope you liked it! If anyone ever wants to see me expand more on anything I’ve written before, just ask!**
#muscle growth tf#jock tf#jock transformation#jockification#twink to jock#muscle tf#alpha with a capital a
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can we get a Paige x reader where Paige is like coming to terms with being gay or like coming out pleasee 🙌
✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡awakening,,
paige bueckers x fem!reader
paige vividly remembers the day she realized you were her gay awakening.
the two of you met in a human development class. you came in late on the first day and sat down right next to her, some of your hair sprawled right onto her computer. you immediately apologized, pulling your hair into a bun and sending her a soft smile. obviously it wasn’t a big deal and she told you that, helping to ease your nerves.
you thought she was pretty, hair also pulled back in a bun and sat comfortably in a sweatsuit. she smiled at you with such reassurance it melted you, maybe she knew how nervous you were.
you and paige quickly became close. you worked on assignments together, went out to lunch after class, and she even introduced you to all her basketball friends. you also introduced her to yours, hiding your blush when your friends sent you suggestive glances. but it wasn’t like that, paige was just your friend. you didn’t even think she was gay. whenever the two of you talked about your past relationships, she only ever talked about guys.
it was your first year at uconn, so you were definitely trying to just navigate your way around your first year. you also really missed your parents. when paige got her injury during a game and couldn’t play anymore, you saw how much it affected her. you remembered telling her all about your family and she said they sound super fun to be around, so you asked her if she wanted to go back home with you.
she said yes.
everyone loved her, to say the least. she felt so welcomed in your home. your mom even made her a ‘get well soon’ cake. your younger siblings clung to her, asking to play basketball and video games.
paige really loved your family.
you carried her bag to your room and told her that you’ll have to share a room since there’s no other space. you even offered to pile up blankets on the floor and sleep on that, but she refused to let you do that. i mean, it wasn’t really a big deal. you’ve shared a bed before.
you both took your respective sides of the bed, but paige’s heart was pounding for some reason and she couldn’t stop thinking about you. your scent was everywhere, permeating her senses and making her mind all fuzzy.
that’s when it happened. that’s when she realized she was so in love with you. so enamored by you that she hadn’t thought about anyone else since she met you. but she quickly pushed those thoughts back down. she knew you didn’t like her. there was this guy back at school that you’d been talking about and things seemed to be going pretty well. so instead of talking you to sleep and leaning into your warmth, paige turned her back to you and faced the cold-front.
after you guys got back to school things felt different.
you were going to one of the team’s games wearing a nika mühl shirt since paige couldn’t really play at the moment. when she saw, she insisted you change to her jersey. you said no because nika was also your friend, but she really kept pushing it.
“this is stupid.” she heard you mutter it under your breath, probably hoping she wouldn’t hear. you ended up not changing, and paige gave you the silent treatment. she started to regret introducing you to her friends, she only wanted to you care about her.
another incident happened when paige met the guy you’d been talking to, jeremy.
he was hanging out at your dorm with you watching a movie. Godzilla or something. it was alright, but you couldn’t really say you were having fun. he was really nice and funny, but he wasn’t really what you were looking for. maybe he’d be more fitting as a friend.
paige, not knowing you were hanging out with him, walked straight into your dorm blabbing about how she bought you snacks for your movie night. the same movie night she said to cancel because she couldn’t make it.
“these were the last two bags they had and i got so freaking excited-“ she’s looking up at you, letting her jaw fall before she quickly catches it. she didn’t know he’d be here with his arm draped around you. she didn’t even know you two were still talking.
paige had been telling herself that she didn’t like you ever since that night at your house. she’s not into you and definitely not gay. but now, in this moment, she feels that mask slipping away and being taken over by hurt and anger. you must’ve been glad she canceled plans so that you could hang out with your boy toy.
“paige.. this is, um. this is jeremy. jere, this is paige.”
jere. she’s mentally rolling her eyes but putting a smile on her face. you’re walking towards her in the kitchen but when she notices him following behind you all she can think about is stepping back and far away from this situation.
“hey, nice to meet you.” he’s holding his hand out for paige to shake, and she does. all while feigning her perfect smile. you see right past her though.
“nice to meet you too jimmy.”
“jeremy.”
“oh, yeah, my bad, jeremy.”
she catches you glaring at her and begins to feel a little bad, but this guy doesn’t deserve your attention and your time. she knows you’re too good for him. she’s really just looking out for you, being your best friend. because that’s what you two are. best friends.
“well jeremy-“
“is it ok if i just, steal her away for awhile? really important stuff i gotta tell her.”
a flood of relief washes over you because he’s nodding and kissing your cheek as he walks out the door. you wipe his kiss away and take a seat on one of the stools against the counter. you can’t believe the audacity on paige, but you’re silently thanking her for getting rid of him.
“what’s going on? what’s so important that you have to tell me right now?”
“oh, that was just an excuse to get him out.”
“what?!”
“well i could tell you didn’t want him here so..” she didn’t actually know if that was true, but she wanted him gone. and now he is. the grin on her face angers you, even though she’s right. how smug shes being about it rubs you the wrong way and you’re almost embarrassed because she’s right—you didn’t want him here.
“aw thanks paigey. i really wanted you to kick out my date.”
paige wants to scream in your face about how much she likes—no, loves you. she refrains though. she knows you don’t feel the same and doesn’t want to lose your friendship. the friendship that has held her together when all she felt like doing was falling apart.
she goes on the defensive because she doesn’t like your tone or the fake smile you’re giving her. she just wants to lay down with you and catch up on life, maybe ask why you didn’t tell her about him. but as soon as she starts talking, she regrets it.
“sorry i was trying to be a good friend. sorry as soon as i said i couldn’t make it you decided to have your fuck buddy over to take my place.”
“are you being serious? you canceled on me! and by the way, he’s not my fuck buddy.”
“then what is he? your boyfriend?”
you don’t really know what to say because she has a point, he’s not your boyfriend. in your heart, he’s nothing to you romantically, but you don’t want to give her a satisfaction of being right.
“i don’t know, maybe! he fucks me like he loves me.”
you’re walking away from her and into your room, searching for your pajamas. you switch your clothes out and you hear her footsteps tracing yours.
she stands there watching you change, feeling her whole body light up. what does that even mean, he fucks you like he loves you?
it’s when her stomach sinks that she knows you’re all she cares about, and she’s not afraid to admit it anymore. she’s never felt this type of jealously before. she’s never been in love like this before either. with a girl. is this what it’s like?
“what does that mean?”
you grow hot under her gaze, wondering why it’s bothering you now that you’re half naked in front of her when it’s never bothered you before. she’s got this solemn expression on her face and it feels like she trying to look into your brain.
“what does it matter to you?”
you realize you didn’t like jeremy because you really just wanted paige. it hurts that you’ll never have her and you’ll just have to find someone else, hoping they can make you feel a fraction of the way she makes you feel. you realize with paige that even if you’re arguing, you’ll always be happy to see her. to feel her presence in any room. she’s always saying the stupidest things and making you smile.
paige fears the same thing. is she going to have to settle for someone else that isn’t you? all because it took her so long to be ok with who she is and how you make her feel. even now, your anger all directed towards her, she admires and loves you. you’re so beautiful and genuine. she remembers when you two went out last month, probably the last time you hung out without arguing, and you had the biggest smile on your face. she realizes now all this is because of her. she argues with you and pushes you away because she’s too drawn to you. if she keeps you close, she can’t stay away.
“because.”
“because? because what, paige?”
“because i really love you.” she pauses, trying to find the wording so she doesn’t fuck this up. you’re staring at her, wide eyes, and you think deep down maybe it’s as more than friends.
“i really love you. more than anyone else i think. more than i’ve ever loved a girl, or a guy. i love you in the type of way where i can’t stay away from you and i have this weird feeling whenever i see you. like butterflies. i love you in the typa way where i want to hold you and kiss you, and spend all of my time with you cause when you’re not around all i do is think about you. even when you’re around, i can’t think about anything else. i.. yeah. i know that i love you.”
“paige..”
“and i hate that you like that guy. jimmy or whatever. i hate him because you like him. i wish i could be him, i wish you felt that way about me and not him. i’ve never liked a girl before, especially not fallen in love with one, but you changed that for me. when you flung your hair all over my damn computer the first time we met, even then i had it out for you, just didn’t know it yet.”
her word vomit concludes and you’re both shocked. she’s shocked she admitted it and you’re shocked she feels that way. about you, of all people. you wish you had recorded it so you can listen to it on repeat forever.
as soon as you open your mouth to speak, she closing her eyes and leaning her head back against the door frame. she didn’t really think about the repercussions too hard and now she has to prepare herself for the rejection.
“paige, i love you too. as more than a friend. i never actually slept with jeremy because i just wanted you. i never said anything about it because i thought you weren’t into girls and-“
she’s got you wrapped around her, clinging to you and she’s kissing you with so much need it might consume her. your lips are soft and moving against hers so perfectly she thinks it might be a dream. she’ll wake up and realize none of it was real. because that’s what you are to her, a dream.
you pull away and look at her, foreheads pressed together. she’s looking at you too, a stupid smile on her face like she’s just won the lottery. in her own special way, she has.
“love you so much, you have no idea.”
she’s pulling you back into a kiss, cupping your face with gentle hands and pulling you impossibly closer. in this moment, you feel heaven’s eternal sun shine on you and paige, melting your souls together and making you feel all warm and bubbly.
“so, i’m gonna do this better later i promise, but will you be my girlfriend?”
“yeah, yes, i will.”
she’s kissing you again and now she’s certain it’s real. she feels you holding her and knows it’s real. she curses herself for not just admitting how she felt sooner, but it ended up with her here in your embrace, so how bad could it really be?
✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩୧⋆｡🕯. -ʚɞ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊
HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS!!
living for these requests atm
also i hope you guys listened to the song, it’s so gay awakening core
#paige buckets#paige bueckers#uconn wbb#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers x reader#uconn huskies#uconn women’s basketball
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Am I the asshole for telling my guy friends I'am a lesbian?
I (29 F, cis, probably bi? A bit ace, definitely like women more) came out around 9 years ago and have mostly dated women. I’ve had a few makeouts with guys, and slept with one guy, but I am still on the fence about my sexuality overall. I like referring to myself as a “bi lesbian, because the lesbian flag is prettier”.
A few years ago, I was in game design school, and was the only girl in my class. The guys were nice, but I still felt a bit othered. I also was paying a lot of attention to how I dressed, and was very feminine. Then one day I talked about my girlfriend, and their attitudes shifted. I started shaking hands in the morning instead of cheek kisses (we’re french), wearing jeans and sweaters, and I became “one of the guys”. People generally assumed I was a lesbian and I wouldn’t really correct it unless it came up. A friend of mine even openly came out, saying I gave him the confidence to do so because of how open I was about my sexuality, and it was just a really nice vibe for the remainder of my time there.
Ever since then, I’ve started being vague about my sexuality, just saying “I’m gay” or “I’m queer”, or “I like girls” when asked, when interacting with guys I wanted to be friends with, or, and that’s, I think, the biggest assholery there, guys that I think were likely to develop a crush on me or try their chances, but I wasn’t interested. If I felt like a friend was becoming too chummy, I’d find the opportunity to be like “oh yeah I’m a lesbian”.
This happened with my current group of friends. There’s one guy I get along with super well, and he’s awesome, one of my best friends, but I felt that he was treating me a bit differently and feared he’d develop feelings for me, so I really hammered in the fact that I was “a lesbian”.
Today, he asked to talk to me in private, and he confessed his feelings for me. He said he would regret it if he didn’t say anything, and that he values our friendship a lot and doesn’t want things to change between us, but he needed to get it off his chest. I thanked him, and turned him down gently, being like “obviously I can’t reciprocate because I’m a lesbian…” but also pointing out that there were other factors that influenced it (distance, culture, general outlook on life and certain political issues, religion…) but it was a very fruitful conversation, and we ended up chatting about stuff and reiterating how much our friendship counted for us, and how much we liked spending time together as friends.
I would like to say I feel guilty, but the truth is I don’t… It feels easier for me to say I’m a lesbian, and give me a way out of these conversations. I feel like if I went in depth into my feelings towards my sexuality, I’d give some of my friends false hopes that they might have a chance with me and ruin the vibe of our friend group.
Should I come clean? Or is it ok to try to protect myself in this manner?
What are these acronyms?
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would anyone be interested in an art stream where I just draw and talk about my ocs and books being:
the three idiots in a world with systematic oppression based on magical vs non-magical blood going on an adventure to find a missing person (Pheobe's dad Edmund) where Miles (magical) has to arrest Edmund from defecting from the magical army but doesn't know his location so uses Pheobe to find him, Lewis (sus non-magical) is coming along because even though he should be arrested he can potentially be pardoned for his crimes for assisting, and Pheobe (non-magical) just wants to find her dad and the three of them end up getting twisted up in a plot to resurrect an eldritch god
Eve and Maddie are besties in college but Eve is a vampire and Maddie has no idea because vampires and werewolves and other supernatural beings are just common in the world but not known to humans because they dont exactly fit the myths that the world has strewn about them and they go on cryptid hunting adventures together and there's gay tension but also there's a couple of murders happening around town that starts to reveal the world of the supernatural to Maddie which makes her a target
The story of an abused girl running away from home set in a dystopia/futuristic setting where automations and humans are commonplace but there's a societal divide and on the run she trips over a corpse in the snow but its not really a corpse but rather a war-machine robot that escaped from the facility it was being created/held who really has no sympathy or understanding of humanity and they end up traveling together on the run as fugitives because its easier to run away if you have the guise of a 'gaurdian' figure aka the robot for the child and for the robot everyone thinks he's a funny looking nanny bot or something so they become less suspisious and eventually found family happens
or the unnamed dnd kid that was abandoned as an infant, found and raised by goblins but that caused disruption so she was dropped off in a village a few years later in the hopes that a good human samaritan would take her in but no one did, so she became a street rat stealing and pickpocketing, later sneaking onto a ship to steal gold she eavesdropped was on there, but it undocks and she's found and it turns out the ship workers didn't work for the empire but actaully were undercover pirates and they debate on killing her but are uncomfortable with but cant let her go now that she knows so they take her in instead to make her pay off her dishoner, and the crew and captain become a psuedo crime family with her and she's taught langauge and healing from the captain and ect until one day years later; the ship is raided and she's knocked out and when she wakes up the crew is gone, no signs of how or where they went and she has to go on an investigative mission to find them
or the one where
bye hold on im realizing how many book wips i have
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I have an issue with the "the giga cover is likely fujobait" because I can't help but think:
if it was truly fujobait, why now?
Why try to get their attention if MHA is now in the 100M club? The series now so popular, hori/jump doesn't need queer shippers to increase its popularity.
Why try to get fujos and queer fans, if it's already popular in that group? Wasn't it apparently shown that MHA is more popular with women and LGBTQ+ fans?
Why try to get that audience when hori had the chance to do that back in 2016-2018 when Kr//bk was the popular gay ship? Wasn't there an interview where someone pretty much asked hori if he's for kr//bk, but instead of playing along, hori made it about bkdk (the ship that no one took seriously at the time) and said he saw the hand hold more about bkdk angst. Kr//bk was a popular ship, it had bones making official art of them. The smash parody manga had moments of it. Two heroes was their movie [I believe hori didn't really help in that movie. However, notice how in the second movie, (he was a part of that one one), focused on bkdk (again, the ship no one took seriously)]. Hori had the ability to use that ship as bait, but he seemed to be the only one out of everyone else to not go for it. Instead he kept pushing for the ship that was thought to be too toxic to even become a platonic ship.
If horikoshi did not want bkdk to seen as romantic, why isn't he stopping jump for implying it? You really can't say that he has no ability to, the guy went to bones and told them the ending. Now, notice how bones suddenly stopped making iz//ch moments and added a bkdk moment in the recap episodes (something that they would never do 2 seasons prior). The assistant (whom hori is friends with) is a loud speaker of dkbk lol. Hori follows him on twitter, there's no way that hori hasn't seen his dkbk art once. Same for katsuki's JP VA (who is also a friend of Hori).
Why try to bait the audience when the manga is ending?
Idk, maybe there's a chance he is actually queerbaiting and make iz//ch canon, but again, after everything?
After the togachako arc? He had made ochako confess her crush on midoriya, only for seconds later to not only brush it off as unimportant (unimportant in the sense of it was more of way to relate to toga and speak with her, it wasn't really used as a "canon izu//ocha" moment), she tells toga that she could have ochako's blood for the rest of her life (and we know that's toga's love language of returning/accepting her feelings) and she told toga that she had the cutest smile in the whole world. Like, didn't hori say that toga was made for ochako's character? I feel like it wouldn't make sense for hori to do all of this, then have ochako end up with midoriya, it would feel like a middle finger to toga tbh.
After chapters 285, 322, 362, 367, 403, and 404? The apology? The "you're the closest one to midoriya izuku, therefore I need to kill you in order to make him go crazy". The heart shaped black whip after seeing bakugou's dying body? The "their feelings became one" double spread? this bullet point could be spread to about 2-3 document pages, but I'm just going to summarize for this post lol. But overall, these chapters (and a few more), show me (imo) that it the "fujobait" claim isn't really strong to use against bkdk.
Again, maybe this is queerbait, because I know that there are times where other media/anime have done simliar and still had the MC in a heterosexual relationship, and leave everyone dumbfounded lol. Once again, all I say to this is "let's see what happens."
P.S. Isn't this the same author who said that he thought that naruto was going to end at 698 (the implied SNS ending) lol? Idk if it's true, that's just something I've heard.
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How did you find the courage to start posting online?
Finding courage is actually why I started this blog!
I’ve always loved writing. The first book I wrote was in high school (and very rarely sees the light of day) back in 2010. I gave short stories to my family for Christmas in 2011 and I did write a little bit of fanfic back then.
But I never tried to query my work and I never posted anything online. I felt like my work wasn’t good enough for a multitude of reasons - too short, too long, choppy dialogue, not interesting, wrong punctuation, etc
Then I went to college and I studied English/psychology/writing for a little bit. One of my writing professors really pushed me to consider publishing (at that point I was on track to get a psychology degree) and I realized that that’s what I wanted. I wanted to be a published writer
But I was too scared!
I was frozen for years. I would write all these stories for fun and never had anywhere to put them. After I left the cult (lol) I ended up not having many friends to read my work either. I had my sister and my best friend from high school (both of whom I owe a lot) and they lived in a different city for most of that time.
College was a really bad time for me all around. I don’t talk about it that much because I very dearly want to be someone who can heal from trauma. But my writing at that time was viciously angry. I felt like I couldn’t share it because it would show everyone how awful I was. So I didn’t post online then either!
I left school and became an EMT with this idea that I was going to be a writer but I still couldn’t bring myself to query. “I need to experience more of life to write,” I thought. “I’m not good enough yet. The things I write are all too depressing or too escapist. One day I’ll write something amazing and I’ll know it and go from there.”
It was during that time (around 2016) that I honestly got sick of myself. I had a lot of insecurities and life was very difficult. It’s hard to explain exactly where my head was at. See, up until the creation of this blog, I was putting writing as a low priority in my life. I was going to keep driving an ambulance. I was going to go back to school. I was going to only engage In The practical side of writing (copy writing) and do other Meaningful Work like driving ambulances or maybe going to law school
But I wanted to write. And I knew I was scared. And I knew that part of what was holding me back were all these expectations from my family and from myself that I needed to focus on finding a career rather than in what made me so happy
So I made this blog! “No one I know will see this,” I thought. “I don’t have to tell them. I can write whatever I’d like without having to worry about hurting anyones feelings or making anyone upset.”
Well, I did make people upset! Hahahah, for some reason 22 yo me wrote a prompt fill of God trying to set up Satan with a guy. A looooot of people (like 6 which seemed like a lot at the time!) sent me messages about how awful I was for writing that and how I needed to take it down
Instead of taking it down or stopping writing, I looked at why I wrote what I did. I’m Pagan. Wby did I feel driven to write a story about God?
The prompt used language I disagreed with (I believe it called satan “a homosexual” like those old anti gay propaganda films) and I wanted to write something that was more positive and nuanced. The story accepted the idea that, at one point, being gay was a sin (I was just coming out at that point as well.) But I also wrote a God that was flawed, who recognized their flaws, and admitted that they made a mistake by trying to control love like that. God apologized to Satan for making him feel he was wrong and that he couldn’t love who he wanted. That story meant something to me who, despite being from an amazingly supportive family, still worried about people being jerks when I went out in public with my girlfriend.
And after looking at all that, I stood by my story. That’s important to why I keep posting online. I stand by what I write. Even if nobody enjoys a story, I like it. And so it stays up.
(Though I will admit that some aspects I’ve had to improve myself on. I had one person point out that I only used Anglo-Saxon names for all my characters. Meaning I only wrote white characters. So, after a lot of googling and reading, I set out to diversify my work! I wrote Firebreather after that, starring Nadezh and I am so obsessed with her.)
I kept the God prompt up and started receiving positive comments on it! I started writing more prompt fills. I’d write after hard 12 hour shifts. I’d write while in the ambulance. I wrote a very popular story from my phone!
I’m very, very lucky! I’ve always received very positive feedback on my stories here. There are people who won’t ever know it but they supported me through very difficult times.
Why have I written all of this? I definitely haven’t shared everything about my writing journey, or my life journey, but these are the highlights. Why share such a long answer to a very straightforward question?
Because I want you to have the context for when I say that the courage to post online comes from a deep and unending love for writing. For your own writing. For the magic that writing helps you create, for the excitement of finishing a story, for the thrill of understanding yourself a little better.
For me, the creation of this blog was an act of self love. I’ve said that on here before. I took an amazing gamble and I won! By posting online, I forced myself to confront my writing head on. People were seeing it and commenting on it, good and bad, and it forced me to interact with my work in a way I hadn’t before.
I started being able to look at my writing from a distance. There were some warts, for sure. But I looked at it and loved it all the same.
I stopped being so ashamed and fearful. My whole family knows about my writing now (that’s actually how I came out as bi to a few of them lmao) and I’ve self-published my own work.
I will say, that I’ve been very lucky on Tumblr. My experience doesn’t seem to be very typical and my blog is a bit more popular than I ever intended! I’m very grateful and blown away by it still.
Courage comes from confidence. Fake it til you make it! I used anonymity as a shield until I gained enough confidence to own my work proudly.
Thanks for the ask and thanks for bearing with my long response. I’ll most likely talk about how posting online affected my mental state and career more at a later date :)
Tl;dr: Love your writing unconditionally. Accept its flaws and know that you have the ability to improve it.
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Alexis Sara's Top 10 Most Anticipated Games Of 2024
We're about to enter 2024 and with that we have all the lists, lists I am not immune to making because I slowly build them up all year. Last year I played a fuck load of games and so this year I wanted to talk about 10 games I think look really fucking cool that are coming out in the next year or two. Some of these games are likely to release in 2025 instead but it'll be fun to see if they remain on the list next year then. I mostly just wanted to spotlight some art that looks cool to me outside of the context of a Sapphic Games Guide or a Review and maybe get others on the hype train with me. This list is not in order and just 10 games I think look like they could have an impact on me, I may not even buy every game on this list but there the 10 that look like I am most likely to check out.
Gales Of Nayeli
So this is one of two games on the list I've already purchased. I backed the kickstarter of the game a while back and I thought "it looks alright and when I asked if there was gonna be any sapphic content the creator told me in depth what content he had already made so sure I'll back it. What was more if a thank you for being so kind and responsive so fast has turned into my most hype game of the year. Blindcoco and me have become friends over time so I am biased but I was actually sold on the game before me and him became buddy buddy when I played the demo and saw the amazing work that went into it. Then the extremally positive response from him and the community towards my desire to focus in on women and sapphic women only added to my excitement for the game.
The game genuinely seems to be raising the bar for SRPGs and really feels like it is a step above Fire Emblem and not an emulation of Fire Emblem. I loved the demo and the concepts in the game so much it inspired me to start working on my own SRPG studios game knowing what is possible at the high end of investment in the system can really be something special and really cool. I love that there is a focus on trying to cast voice actors who match ethnicity to the diverse cast, I love that there is a wide range of diversity in the revealed cast, I love the amount of queer women I am aware of in the game, I love the animations and sprite work, I love the gameplay, I am really really excited about this game and I think this game has a high shot at being one of my favorite games.
Fields Of Mistria
I make fun of farming sims a little on my lists and stuff but only because I actually love farming sims especially in concept. This game probably has my favorite art style of the whole lot of games today. It's lovely 90s anime style sprite work is just AHHHHHHHHHH so good. I do in fact want to kiss the women in this game very badly and I would enjoy playing the game for the sake of dating them alone.
Rune Factory: Dragon
Let's bang out the second farming sim while we're at it. We don't know a bunch about this game but it really just has to do two things for me to be into it. One, let you be gay like the newest RF and Story of Season games already let you do and Two, keep up the art direction and bam, I'm in. My biggest problem with the last Rune Factory game was that the art style made every woman look like a 12 year old and not in the like chibi story of seasons way like they just looked like they were kids. This however, has a much better set of art direction and it makes me think there might actually be women I'd want to gay marry.
Mahou Senshi Cosplay Club
I really love Behold's previous game Chroma Squad but when I got this demo I had no idea they were the Chroma Squad people. The mix of dress up and RPG gameplay is a dream come true kind of game and the outfit customization is leagues beyond a game like Fashion Dreamer despite likely being made on a much smaller budget. The PSX style graphics actually work here with them evoking nostalgic graphics while also not actually being restrained by a Playstation One's issues. I just really loved the process of making the outfit and character in this game and honestly that alone is a potential game seller. The gameplay element was solid and I really want to play more of this.
Beastieball
BeastieBall seems to be a really fun take on the Monster Taming genre. Having the monster friends play a sport and naturally be inclined to play the sport makes for a very cute and wholesome premise to which you become more a coach than an owner to these little cuties. It's a pretty simple concept in the demo but it's promising and cute and I do like that the monsters you collect build relationships with each other, I think that is something really special and neat and something I'd like to see more monster tamers do.
Love In A Bottle
There is a lot of nice looking visual novels coming out but Love In A Bottle is dating sim that is really capturing my eye. You play as a demon girl, bam okay I am sold. You date other monster girls okay I'm sold. And it's got more then the basic one outfit you expect from a standard visual novel dating sim type deal for characters that is yet another sold factor. It seems really cute, seems fun and I hope I can smooch all the women at once.
Fantasy Life I
While I said we were done with farming sims, I didn't say we were done with sims as we have Level-5's Life Sim, Fantasy Life. I won't be buying the game if I can't be gay in it but I really loved the first Fantasy Life on the 3DS and I think if it can keep up the charm and fun of the original game and add a homosexual seasoning on top it'll be a perfect cute and fun time. I love the wide array of jobs and how these all build into each other, it's a very one of a kind experience and really fun.
Princess Peach Showtime
This is the true triple A game of the list and the only one that has captivated me in all the shows of all the consoles and developers I've seen of late. Peach is barbie now and I am here for it, let her have a million jobs and have a game based around her doing these different roles and being an icon in each of them, sounds good, I'm in, it's a really cute and fun concept. It looks really fun and the art style looks great.
Our Life Now and Forever
There is no other games like the Our Life games and getting to be sapphic in this one means I finally get to go ahead and experience the series I have been curious about for a while now. This game will let you be polyamarous which is the only game on this list I can say for sure will allow you to do that and that alone is something that would keep me engaged. However, getting to grow up with characters, change your pronouns, your name, anything about yourself as you do and having the characters change with you is amazing. I love the concept of this game and the wild reactivity the games demo has always provided just to a simple thing like me choosing to be trans in the childhood phase is amazing, it is truly such a considered and thoughtful game with such masterful crafting that the act one demo alone is probably worth money. So I did back this one on kickstarter as well so this is my other pick up.
Unlike other games on this list I am fairly confident this is a 2025 game and not a 2024 game but I want to talk about it now because people on the Patreon will be getting to play updated versions of the game over the course of the year akin to early access. I think the game is for sure worth a look.
Izrand Allure
After playing the previous game in the series I am totally sold on wanting to experience Izrand Allure. Luxaren Allure was a really special experience I had this year finally checking out the game after I think years of putting it off and beating it I really want to play this follow up. This game seems far more in depth and far more artistically masterful then Luxaren as well so I really want to see everything this game has to offer. I love a good job system and this game boasts one. I really want to see this lesbian RPG and I hope I get a chance to play it very soon but obviously Unity the dev should take her time to make it. Regardless, I am just gushing every time I see the game and I think this has potential to be a massive game of the year type hit for me.
If you enjoyed this post, I got a lot more end of the year lists coming up when it's actually next year so I can tell people what I enjoyed in December. You can also support me in making cool queer art by checking out my Patreon and Ko-fi.
#Gales Of Nayile#Izrand Allure#Games 2024#Games#Our Life Now and Forever#our life: now and forever#Our Life#Peach Showtime#Fantasy Life I#Mahou Senshi Cosplay Club#Beastie Ball#Love In A Bottle#Fields Of Mistria#Sapphic Games#Lesbian Games#Indie Games#Beastieball#Rune Factory: Dragon#Gales Of Nayeli#2023
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it's time for!!! a ds9 update <3 wow <333 last night we watched "past prologue" and "a man alone."
past prologue:
FIRST OF ALL, THAT LITTLE GAY DOCTOR
idk what i expected but the scene i've seen gifs of was the VERY FIRST ONE right out of the gate. i was so thrilled. for some reason garak is WAY different than i expected. like, he's just as gay, of COURSE, but for some reason i expected him to be like...meaner. and instead he's sooooo friendly and he's also a fucking tailor. julian bashir needs a new fucking suit.
that said, bashir is so slow on the uptake literally all of the time. the suit thing and something in the other episode that i forgot. king how can you be a doctor when you are so stupid...not that i'm complaining. i wouldn't change it for anything. he's so funny.
HILARIOUS that immediately after he has any clandestine conversations w garak he has to IMMEDIATELY run to the "bridge" and tell everybody about it. he gets so excited. he really is hilarious i don't think he's done a single thing so far that wasn't funny. the fact that he was late to this little party also sir get it together
i think this ep had excellent character stuff for kira, who we've only known 5 minutes. it sets up her history and her current position so well, and her conflict of interests is such a real and tangible thing that i felt awful for her. like you knew from the beginning that guy was gonna betray her but OUCH. ending the ep on her getting called a traitor was Such a choice.
i also loved her little scene with odo..."i don't do pretense" alright autism king. and yet he talked her through it and then sort of took the decision out of her hands at the end (which was a very compassionate thing to do) when it became clear what most of her wanted to do...he's like. a really good person actually 🥺
HE TURNED HIMSELF INTO A RAT.......i love getting shocked when random objects turn out to be odo. i love playing this game. also, there was totally a leaky pipe in that scene too. ds9 feels so fucking lived in...you'd never have those on tng.
i also think sisko did a good job threading the needle here, even if kira had to go over his head to get him to see reason. you gotta do what you gotta do but he was mostly compassionate to kira's dilemma and even let her take point when she requested it...AND THEN LOL smiled while threatening her if she ever went over his head again. WHICH IS WHAT KIRA DOES. SMILES WHEN ANGRY. it was really good. i like him so much
it was such a nice touch to add o'brien telling him not to hand that guy over to the cardassians. the implication being that he was in the room when picard was transported back to the enterprise post-torture which like of COURSE he was. i don't think him outlining in detail picard's torture by those guys would have swayed sisko's opinion much because it's picard so it was also smart that he didn't go into particulars. but it does hammer home that what the cardassians do to people is real to the bajorans and to o'brien in a way that it is not (yet?) real to sisko.
KLINGON SISTERS. when they first appeared i was like "holy shit those boob windows" even though i didn't recognize their faces at all. i recognized only the boob windows. then when they said their names i was like I KNEW IT. what a funny little throwback
side bar i also love that they call the station itself ds9. they don't say deep space nine they say ds9 just like we do
a man alone:
holy racially motivated hate crimes, batman
wait sorry actually let me start at the beginning. the first scene with julian getting shot down 1000 times by jadzia (or are we supposed to call her dax...) was really funny. i'm trying to figure out in my mind palace if he's a bi king or a gay-but-closeted king.
also, so much happened in this episode. there was an a plot a b plot AND a c plot but instead of feeling rushed it just felt comfortably chaotic. i was never waiting for one plot to be over so we could get to the one that really mattered, you know? i liked everything that was going on except for the lack of garak i want him to be in every episode so bad
i like everything jadzia had going on this ep...like, people react to her different as a super hot lady than they did as an old man. sisko's talk about fucking the twins was especially hilarious. dude you can still fuck twins with her if you wanted. but the way that like 3 different people had romantic tension with her and she's just out here to do her job AND ALSO is like "i try to rise above all that" so true aroace queen. although i do actually know she has a romantic plotline with worf (who should be fucking riker and deanna) and also that *** ****, which sucks a lot.
i liked keiko getting an actual plotline in this episode. like this place didn't even have a bed for jake when sisko got here, of course she doesn't wanna raise her daughter there, and of course she's bummed out that her field of expertise is fucking useless there, although i agree w her husband that somebody needs to plant some fucking trees. i do disagree with her that it's less safe than the enterprise, though...that ship almost blows up every fucking week. anyway the fact that sisko was ready to give her whatever she needed was very nice. please treat her really niceys. side bar her baby is AODRABLE that child wanted her hands on that little bell soooo bad
speaking of jake!! it was nice to see him again. i like that when he gets in trouble his dad is obviously pissed without it being like a Problem. like he's pissed and jake is in trouble and sisko is gonna lay down the law but it's not a relationship-threatening issue. it was harmless teenage fun.
unfortunately sisko did kinda carry the idiot ball for the rest of this ep...i feel like there were so many choices he could have made to maybe NOT put a giant target on odo's back and it also took him a lot longer than i would have liked to step in once the mob started going, but he did step in, so that's what matters.
i loved odo in this episode!! he's just as angry as kira is in his own way, and his relationship with both her and quark (WOWWW more on that in a sec) feel so lived in, you can feel the years between them...it's also just now apparent to me that he's actually really protective, which, aw. i love also the lore that every 18 hours he has to just exist as goop in a pail. so true king me too
odo also aroace king he simply chooses not to couple. so true. that said whatever he and quark had going on was FUNNN i love a little sexual tension in my star trek. is he aroace or is he gay for that little ferengi. only time will tell.
on a more serious note odo's quarters getting hate crimed really drives home how set apart he is from others...and the mob section was GENUINELY scary. and he's so protective it was a little sad that kira was the only one really standing up for him :(
I NEARLY FORGOT TO ADD: julian bashir straight up growing a guy in a bubbly goopy little vat just to catch a killer? insane. thats a whole ass person who is about to be part of society who exists "just because." imagine the existential issues lmao
TONIGHT: "babel" and "captive pursuit." technically after babel we're supposed to watch "ship in a bottle" from tng, but i've been informed it's a barclay episode which means i will be watching it myself later tonight on 2x speed. it's not the first time we've fucked with the order a little bit lol (i was famously late finishing tas) so i still count it as mostly watching in release order
#personal#star trek blogging#ds9 lb#MY DS9 POSTS ARE LONGER THAN MY TNG ONES LOL. wow#it's still too early to tell but contenders for my favorites are kira odo bashir and sisko. and garak. so like half the fucking cast
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I have an idea for a cute Dylan x reader request! So Dylan’s 6’2 making him very tall with a girlfriend reader who’s like 5ft or so who Dylan’s likes to tease and torture since then she will have to ask him for his help to get things that are taller and that he likes to help him and get stuff from her in return. (He moves her stuff on purpose) But during the summer camp she’s been noticing a lot of her stuff being moved higher with Dylan who always helps, so she decided to tease him in return by asking Jacob to get those items instead (since he’s also tall and got explain what’s happening so he gladly helped) and Dylan’s like wtf man and she tells him what he does which he tries to deny but she just stares at him like really? And he confesses why and that’s she’s really cute with her height
Disclaimer: I will not write for Dylan and a female reader in any capacity as I believe he is gay. However, I will still write these kinds of requests for male readers as I believe they deserve the content.
I combined the two above requests as I didn't want them to either be too short or too similar. Also never apologise for sending in too many requests!
Word count: 894
Genre: fluff
If there was one unfortunate truth you had to face early on in life it was this, you were short. You were almost always the shortest person your age everywhere you went and now as a counsellor at Hackett’s Quarry even some of the kids were taller than you. Causing you to develop a spiritual presence that more than made up for your lack of physical stature.
It had been a few weeks at camp and Dylan had quickly established himself as the bane of your existence but you had well and truly gotten it through his skull that one more short joke would lead to a punch in the dick. He’d quickly backed off from most of the verbal teasing but every time you needed to reach something off a high shelf he would inexplicably be there, standing with his body pressed against yours to reach the object for you.
At first you hadn’t really suspected anything but then items you had sworn were placed on lower shelves suddenly appeared in places you definitely hadn’t left them. Places outside your current reach and sure enough, Dylan would be there with a grin and item in hand before you could protest. Narrowing your eyes as he held the latest item over your head in an attempt to watch you jump, you decided that two could play at this game.
The next day you tracked down Jacob to enlist his help, explaining that you thought Dylan was purposefully moving your things to higher shelves and that you wanted Jacob to help you get things down. Jacob readily agreed to help just happy to be included. Unfortunately, he couldn’t always be around so Dylan still had to help occasionally but you and Jacob had taken it a step further and fixed your schedules to near match the others. A lot of extra time spent around Jacob had you realising how sweet he actually was and the two of you became pretty good friends.
Dylan was getting irritated, initially he hadn’t clocked onto the fact that Jacob had replaced him as high shelf object grabber. The first few times it happened he just figured that Jacob had seen you struggling before Dylan could help and the counsellor being the good person, he was offered to help you. However, a week had passed and he noticed that Jacob was suddenly inexplicably always in your space. He had been replaced and what was even worse was that you actually thanked Jacob every time he helped, with a genuine smile and everything. He’d even upped the ante and moved more and more of your stuff at more frequent intervals but now Jacob was pretty much constantly around you. He had found out from Nick that the two of you had moved around your schedules so your timetables were similar. He had ended up confronting Jacob that afternoon, grilling him on your alleged relationship only to be further frustrated as the man in question just laughed and said you were really good friends.
It had been a few days since Dylan had helped you get something down and you were beginning to wonder what had changed. Sighing once again as you noticed the book you had been reading placed above your reach you were grateful Jacob was already in the room as he grabbed it for you without needing any words. Turning your head a the feel of eyes on you, you noticed Dylan’s dejected gaze on you, watching as Jacob handed you something yet again. Deciding to finally confront the tall menace you thanked Jacob before heading over to where Dylan was standing. Stopping in front of where he was sitting you raised an eyebrow.
“You know if you wanted to talk to me, you didn’t have to keep moving my stuff” you said pointedly, one hand on your hip.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about” he tried to dismiss but faltered under your intense gaze. “Ok, I’ve been moving your stuff” he admitted “I just wanted to spend time with you and I thought it was really cute when you couldn’t reach things. I’m sorry it got so out of hand” he sheepishly admitted, averting his eyes and nervously twiddling with his hands. Laughing lightly you nudged him
“If you stop moving my shit I’ll hang out with you all you want” you promised causing his gaze to shoot to you with wide eyes. “In fact we can start now” you said, grabbing his hand you dragged him out of the lodge, his form towering over you comically.
That was how Dylan spent the rest of the summer camp, being hauled around behind your smaller body. The kids and even your fellow counsellors laughing at the scene in front of them, neither of you cared much, and Dylan looked forward to inevitably being dragged around by you. You had also started to initiate much more physical contact to his delight, pulling him into hugs that ended up engulfing you in his form. Whenever Dylan was feeling in more of a cheeky mood he would swoop you into his embrace, squishing you against him and preventing any hope of escape. You couldn’t say you minded too much though, it was comforting and you had grown to enjoy being trapped in your now boyfriend's arms.
#the quarry dylan#the quarry oneshot#the quarry#dylan lenivy x reader#dylan lenivy x you#the quarry imagine#the quarry requests#dylan lenivy
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Ok so, @destielification asked about my Simon Amstell joke, and I'm not going to hijack poor @centurieslove's post but...
(Sorry, this isn't Merlin-related but it's tangentially about Colin Morgan, so it is at least Merlin-adjacent.)
Simon Amstell, if you didn't know, is a British stand-up comedian and certified weird little man.
I'm not, like, a Simon Amstell fan or anything, but I do like stand-up comedy. And I became aware of Simon Amstell some years ago after watching one stand-up show of his on YouTube, which is Do Nothing, which is still available, in fact, and you should definitely watch if you haven't because it's pretty good.
Now Simon's openly gay, and in Do Nothing he talks a lot about his romantic life, or lack thereof, and he jokes a lot about the type of men he finds attractive, who he describes as "ill-thin", "timid" and "vulnerable".
And one of the funniest bits in the show is one where he recounts an extremely awkward encounter with one such man — an actor Simon had "fallen in love with", despite never having talked to him.
So Simon went to see a play starring this actor in the hope of meeting him afterwards and maybe talking to him a bit, which didn't happen.
What did happen, though, is that a few weeks later Simon randomly bumped into the very same actor, love of his life, in a shop. And he decides there and then that it's destiny, and he must shoot his shot. (You can skip the quote below if you intend to watch the show, but I'm pasting it here because it's hilarious).
I saw him there, he hadn't seen me. He was about a metre away from me. There, that thin. And what I thought... For some reason, what I thought would be really cool and seductive would be to just stand in the middle of the shop and shout his full name.
He turned round, alarmed. I could see the terror in his eyes, but because I'd started at a certain volume, I thought it'd be too odd to get any quieter. So I'm there just shouting about the good reviews this play has had and he's going, "Oh, I don't really read reviews." And he's all timid and vulnerable, which is why I love him.
And I think the difference between us, because I think we were both quite shy as children... I say, "I think" — I did a lot of research on him.
And that man's name? Ben Whishaw. Apparently.
Look, I have no idea who claimed it first. I don't know if Simon admitted it in an interview at some point, or what. But it became An Established Fact™️ that the actor he was talking about was, indeed, Ben Whishaw. And if you watch Simon Amstell's show, and you know about Ben, well. It tracks. It makes perfect sense, actually.
Anyway, Simon talks to Ben, gives him his email address with some excuse or another. Ben promises to email him. And then, he doesn’t. Cue sad noises from the audience.
And that could have been the end of it, except that Simon, certified weird man, decided to be weird about it. And instead of letting it go, he elaborates his trauma by incorporating it into his writing.
And in case you think I'm exaggerating — here's what Simon himself wrote about it some time after the fact, in his own book. Straight from the horse's mouth.
A year later, the actor was in another play at the Royal Court. So I thought I’d give myself one more go at making him love me. I felt I’d written and performed all the insanity out of my head and was now ready for something real. I believed this because it would have been unbearable to accept that after all that transformative, healing comedy, I was still the same lunatic. (source)
So what Simon did was write a sit-com, in which he played a fictionalised version of himself, and in it he put a character called Ben Theodore, a pretentious theatre actor and also, basically, Ben Whishaw. (Like, if you know Ben Whishaw, you cannot not see it. That's him talking.)
But hang on, you might say, I thought this was going to be about Colin? Why are you going on about Ben Whishaw?
Well, Simon, in case you don't remember (and at this point I hope you don't) is also the writer and director of the film Benjamin (BENjamin), starring Colin Morgan as the lead and title character.
A Colin Morgan who, I might say, has something of a young Ben Whishaw about him. And he doesn't play a pretentious actor this time — in fact he plays a version of Simon Amstell himself — but the fact remains that he's exactly Simon Amstell's type, kind of looks like the man Simon was admittedly obsessed with, and even bears his name. And Simon cast him in his film to play himself, which is weird but also funny and very on brand for him, because he's self-obsessed like that.
So, to come back to my joke — I just thought the idea of Simon Amstell developing an obsessive crush on Colin Morgan and going to see The Tempest specifically to see him and missing him was hilarious.
But he did get to have him in his own film, so.
(I can't censure Simon too much for his obsession with Ben because... well, same, and also it resulted in Simon giving us Colin Morgan looking Peak Gay and serving cunt in Benjamin — in his own accent! — and I'll be forever grateful for it).
here's another post about it
#I'm doing that thing where you dissect a joke like a frog#and it's not funny anymore#but you deserve to know about simon amstell and his obsession with timid thin actors#you'll never be as obsessed with an actor as simon was obsessed with ben#the fact that ben and colin are friends is sending me SJKDFJSLKJ#i didn't even know!!#i still think it'd be funny if colin did a ben whishaw and just went “oh i have a husband actually” some day#it wouldn't even surprise me#do you think simon saw those b&w pictures of those two in pj harvey's studio and started hyperventilating#like i know HE KNOWS about it#simon amstell#colin morgan#ben whishaw#benjamin 2018#*not merlin
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☆ punch out sexuality headcanons ☆
im running out of funny things to say help me, also tw for mentions of homophobia & transphobia
Glass Joe
- aromantic asexual (sex neutral, romance positive) + trans, he/him
- Just because hes ace doesnt mean he doesnt make inappropriate jokes on a daily basis, if there was a ranking of who made the most sexual jokes he'd be at the top
- when he came out as trans to his parents they were suprisingly supportive even though they didnt understand much, it just went like: "mom, dad, im a boy and if you dont like that too bad" "we dont care as long as you dont murder anyone" And they were generally chill with him
- when he first binded he used bandages & cloth instead of a actual binder (before he came out) and due to that he almost wasnt able to get top surgery
- has faked a lot of crushes to fit in during his childhood, ended up dating 3-5 people he didnt even like
- thought his gender envy was attraction until he just asked himself "do i wanna be them or be with them" And boom, gender confusion
- fell down the "im not like other girls!" to "im not a girl." pipeline
Von Kaiser
- demiromantic, demisexual + bi with a preference for men, he/they
- when he didnt know the demi labels he just saw himself as a picky dater, when he saw the demi labels he was like "Wait thats me" And pretty much ascended on the spot
- thought everyone just liked both men & women until he said it out loud and got met with pure shock
- his first crush was a famous model he saw in a fashion magazine, also slipping down the "do i wanna be them or be with them" pipeline
- his dad wasnt really supportive but became a bit more open minded once he realized that his hatred distanced himself from his son even more
Disco Kid
- nonbinary,gay, he/she
- okay with both feminine & masculine terms
- somebody tried to call him "princess" to insult him when he was little, instead he took it as a compliment and saw them as a friend, still in contact with said person & theyre besties now, the princess thing has become a nickname for him
- when he first came out his parents were like "the closet was wide open" and were not suprised at all, they saw it coming 1000 miles away as soon as he started it out with the "i have to say something important"
- started doing make up & playing around with dresses thanks to a close friend of his (the childhood friend) , when he first put on a dress he was like "i think i realized something"
King Hippo
- #1 label hater + all pronouns
- if he were to use labels, he would count as gender apathetic and pan oriented aroace
- labels are for losers to him
- not out but his parents know that he doesnt give a shit about labels, they first found out when he didnt care about being called "queen" and liked it, they have no problem with it
Piston Hondo
- pan, cis (?) + he/him but likes to refer to himself with feminine pronouns in japanese
- not out to his parents but dropping hints, theyre struggling to pick up on it and hes going mad over it
- going through some major gender questioning™
- playing around with dresses & femininity and enjoying it
Great Tiger
- polysexual (prefs are enbies, men & genderqueer ppl), genderqueer + all pronouns
- closeted it but trying to make it clear hes not straight,its just flying over his parents head like "oh me oh my our son is sure close with his friends!! Such close bros"
- likes dresses not only for spinning skirts but also how comfy they are
Bear Hugger
- gay, bear (ITS IN THE NAME. COME ON THE CLOSET IS GLASS), trans + he/him but ok with they/them
- when he first came out there was a lot of crying, not in the "i wont accept this wahh" way but more in the "i cant believe you trusted me enough to tell me this" way
- didnt know he was trans until he said "yeah i like being called son, yeah i like being called manly, im a girl though" out loud and he was like "wait a minute"
- has had 2-3 boyfriends during his teen years and is still in touch with them since the break ups were done without any harsh feelings & grudges, hes the only person that can see his exes all chatting together and not die of a heart attack on the spot
Don Flamenco
- gay, trans + he/they
- got called gay way before he knew it since he kept calling his male friends handsome often, always passed it off like "cant a man call his friend handsome?"
- the only feminine terms he will accept is queen and aunt, refer to him as anything other than that and he will punch you to orbit
- cut off contact with his parents since they didnt accept him & kicked him out, the only person who took him in was his aunt, she helped him get t & bind safely before he got top surgery
Aran Ryan
- genderfluid, pomosexual + all pronouns
- label hater but still uses them because why not
- came out in the most casual way possible, was just chilling on the couch with his dad and he just said "i kinda like being called miss sometimes" from boredom just to see dad go "huh??"
- sometimes does drag when he feels fem
Soda Popinski
- gay, cis + he/him
- Rocky dating history, most break-ups of his were really sad since it was either forced by family members or over arguments
- exes with bald bull but they still get along & dont care about their past, they just had better platonic connection and decided together
- out but not, making it clear hes a bit fruity but not too much for it to snowball into "the rumour come out: does soda popinski is gay?"
Bald Bull
- Boyflux, gay + he/they
- flamboyantly gay and cannot hide it no matter how much he tries, the closet is not even present, show him someone he has a crush on and you'll hear the gayest squeal in your life before he evaporates into thin air and holds you at gunpoint
- has the Don Flamenco issue going for him, compliments his male friends and calls them handsome wayyy too often, this time its 99% more obvious
- either really bitter with his exes or close friends, no inbetween, if you tell him "yeah your exes asked about you, theyre there" theres a 50% chance its gonna have his soul physically exit him and another 50% chance hes gonna walk right over to them and say hi
- not out publicly since it would cause a shitstorm, only out to a few people he trusts, has issues trusting people to not say his secrets since a close friend of his outed him during his teen years
Super Macho Man
- bi (slight pref for women), cis + he/she
- didnt really come out, he just showed up to his parents door with his (now ex) bf and was like "heyy say hi to my boyfriend" and everyone just kinda accepted it
- thought the attraction to men was envy for a long time until he learned the fact that wanting to be lifted into the arms of a man and making out with said man is not really straight
Mr Sandman
- gendervoid, demiromantic, acespec, pan + all pronouns
- feels like he should be more masculine but cant bring himself to it,he cant force his behavior to act in a way that doesnt fit him
- out and about, hes not repressing himself for anyone
#tw homophobia#Tw transphobia#punch out#headcanon#punch out wii#punch out headcanons#don flamenco#bald bull#glass joe#piston hondo#aran ryan#great tiger#von kaiser#disco kid#king hippo#i had fun doing this#i like researching about identities a lot so this was very enjoyable#“Why is most of the minor circuit ace & arospec-” FIREBALL ATTACK#if u disagree: nuh uh
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I'm a Bisexual a Steve, Nancy and Johnathan girlie first and foremost, but I've been thinking about the potential for Steve and/or Nancy not even knowing being homosexual was an option for them. The whole "yes, I've dated the opposite gender but never felt quite right about it". As an ace aro person that has "been there-done that", I'm really interested in the topic.
So, have a little gay Steve steddie ficlet with some bisexual Eddie, because why not (I usually headcanon him as gay but you know, thought it could be funny for this fic). Probably will do a Nancy one too.
Warnings for uses of queer as a slur, 80's general homophobia, and internalized homophobia. Also long post :
Steve has always been into girls. Obviously. He's Steve "The Hair" Harrington, king of Hawkins High. He's been suavely flirting his way through half the school's population since day one. The female half, obviously.
It was something that made his dad proud of him in ways only basketball and swimming had before. "That's my boy!" He'd said anytime Steve related his latest conquest. His son being a Lady's man was another badge of honor on the list. Sure, his Steve wasn't the brightest, but he was charismatic in that way only True Men of Business were. He did not need to know that Steve was simply copying those same men.
At first it came naturally. He wanted to emulate his heroes. His father, the movie characters the were "the only true Men left in this dammed country" according to his dad, the movie stars he laughed with, telling little Steve "now that's what I call charm!".
So Little Stevie got the message, just like he'd gotten the message that he had to be good at sport and all the other things his parent's love was condiotional upon. It was only natural, all parents wanted to be proud of their children. It was the child's job to make them proud, but instead of money they payed in love. So easy even little Stevie could understand it. He simply followed the instructions.
Girls came after that, and really, it was more of a side effect than anything else. The men he looked up to always knew how to sweep girls off their feet: just a little sweet talk and a shiny smile. He had not put a lot of thought into what happened afterwards though, he was just a kid after all.
Soon enough, he understood that his parents thought it was great that their little Romeo was the most popular boy in school. More so when the mothers started gossiping about "what a suave little cassanova the Harringtons have!". His mother fawned and chuckled with them, clearly loving the compliments her son received.
So Cassanova it was. He learned soon enough that dating had its own set of rules, just like friendships and sports and school and dressing. He needed to keep this perfect balance between easy to fall for and hard to obtain. When he became a teenager he understood his father found his salacious stories about making out with girls funny, but that he would not approve just any girl. If he was to bring anyone home for a proper dinner, she had to be pretty, rich, soft spoken, smart but not smarter than his dad, christian, dressed appropriately...the list went on and on.
He thought he figured it out with Nancy, because Nancy was great. She was his first big love, the girl she actually enjoyed spending time with. Most of the others had been an exhausting amount of acting the part, pretending to be interested in things that bored him off his mind, and actually getting some pretty decent validation from feeling desired.
But not Nancy. She was actually fun to be around! Nancy always had a dozen new topics she was passionate about and could spend hours on end rambling about them while Steve thought about how lucky he was to have found a girl that didn't felt like chore.
His father was not thrilled. Apparently she was "decent enough", but he assured Steve that her Know-it-all tendencies would end up driving him up the wall soon enough. Steve hoped it wouldn't. It had been hard enough to find a balance between who he was expected to date and who he enjoyed dating.
Intimacy with Nancy was something he simultaneously looked forward and was terrified of. Seducing girls was half the job of. He also had to learn how to "rock their world" or else his reign would be a short one. He knew girls gossiped, they made sure to lock eyes with him before whispering in their friends ears and coyly waving at him giggling. So he studied the subject with the same feverish intensity he'd studied how to get his hair right. And the feeling of accomplishement he got from it was almost reward enough.
Nancy was a different story, you see. She was the one. She was the future Steve was hoping for, the mother of his kids. And he was dreading getting to third base with her. What if it felt like a chore? Spending time with Nancy had never felt like that, but what if the sex part was awful? He always got the impression the girls were getting way more out of it than he was, and he just wanted to feel like them for once. So when it all came to shit, he blamed it on the Demogorgon.
It wasn't Nancy's fault, nor his. It was just so incredibly awkward to do the dirty when the last time you did, your girlfriend's bestie got murdered! So they decided to take it slow, and Steve couldn't be more grateful. Their first time hadn't been so bad, it's just he had trouble remembering with all the upside down bullshit and Johnathan Byers punching him.
Johnathan was a queer. That's what his father had called him, so Steve called Johnathan a queer. That's the way the world worked. Steve understood enough about them: They were weird, they didn't like girls, they tried to ruin the people that were actually normal, and they carried a really fucked up disease. He hoped Byers didn't have it. Look, the guy may had punched him, but he deserved a break. Byers had been so brave for his brother, like a hero from a movie. Maybe his father had been wrong about him being a queer.
He learned that his father had most definitely been wrong when his girlfriend cheated on him with said Byers after calling Steve "Bullshit". It wasn't a slap in the face, it was a sucker punch to the heart. But he'd manage, he always did. It would be easier without Billy though.
The thing about Billy was that Steve hated him. With fervor. He was a racist asshole that threatened one of his boys and constantly tried to antagonize him. He had something about him that unnerved Steve in the same way Johnathan had, but unlike Byers, he did it on purpose.
His father hated him too, but in that way that meant Steve was at fault somehow. "You can let that queer beat you!" He always shouted after Billy managed to be the center of attention at all their matches. He had decided that Billy was a queer too, you see. He cared too much about his looks and he was from California, which apparently was were they came from. Steve wasn't too sure about it, after all, he had been wrong about Byers.
When robin happened, he almost cried. It had been his second chance, another girl he actually liked spending time with. Robin was funny and smart and charming. His parents were going to hate her but it'd stopped being about them a long time ago. Steve needed to like a girl for himself, to prove wrong the intrusive thoughts about Johnathan, Tommy H, Billy and the rest. But Robin had not been the solution he'd hoped for. Instead, she had been the catalyst that absolutely wrecked his life. Sure, she also made it a hundred times better, but still.
He did not talk to her about it. Not at first. It was so much, and he was still reeling from the fact that he was friends with one of the queers his dad hated so much. It took him a while just to unlearn the stereotypes and fear mongering rumours he had been raised in. Robin helped, she had decided that not getting bashed after rejecting him probably meant Steve was safe. So she explained to him the lesbian thing.
Steve didn't want to stop her. Clearly, Robin had no one else to talk to about it, and the relieve on her face when she told him about the sub culture, about liking Vicky about her feelings in general...he could not bring himself to take that alway from her no matter how much he wanted to. And God he wanted to. He wanted to go back, back to a time were he didn't have all this thought and doubts and nonsense. Because the things that Robin said about men...no. Robin had known she was a lesbian. If Steve was q...gay, he would have known by now. Yup.
Eddie Munson was the most unexpected gear to finally click in Steve's head. Honestly, he would have been way less upset about it if it had been Tommy H or Billy. Sure, he hated them, but The Freak??? That was several levels more life ruining than it needed to be. But God was it unavoidable.
It started with the kids raving about the famed Eddie Munson. The greatest DM, the most talented musician, the coolest dude on planet earth, and sure enough Steve was jealous. Who was this Munson guy to take HIS kids? He'd fought monsters for them, and that's how they repaid him? Ungrateful little shits. He barely remembered the guy from school, but he knew he was supposed to be older than him, and he was still there? Loser! Even he had managed to graduate. And then he met him.
The Vecna thing was a harrowing affair all by itself. He almost lost a couple of his kids and his emotional support Robin. But it was just an almost. Eddie managed to rescue himself and Dustin from the demo bats by "doing what I'm best at Harrington!". They've managed to steal enough time by blocking the gate with his wardrobe to steal yet another car. He violated several traffic laws just to get to the creel's house before the demo bats did and, well, that got Carvers attention. And thank God, because Lucas needed to climb on top of Dustin to reach for Max ears, powering El in the process. Nancy took care of Carver fast enough when a sprinting Eddie greeted them at the gate.
Steve did not now if it was the theatrics with which he explained the situation, or the fact that he saved Dustin, Lucas and Max, but the denial was over. He tried to go back, to ignore the feeling in his chest (those famed butterflies, making a mess of his ribcage), but it was too little to late. The way he smiled at him from the hospital bed while they patched up the gunshot wounds from Carver. The way he reassured a guilty faced Lucas that he'd survive "isn't that right Harrington?". This wasn't Billy's attractive yet hateable face nor an inconvenient crush on Byers. He was in deep.
Robin was as helpful as Steve had been to her when she needed to vent about her own homosexuality. By the end, Steve was Hyperventilating and in tears because what the actual fuck. And then Robin just... awkwardly hugged him and whispered "it's okay if we can't talk about boobies anymore". He laughed. Of course he'd laugh. A bit hysterical at first, but by the end of it both of them were joking about being "too much of a perfect match". He thought Robin being a lesbian would be the thing that ruined everything, but it was just the perfect fit. Sure, everything else was still awful, but they could be miserable together.
It became a dangerous game, guessing what else exactly had been a mask he put on to keep his parents happy. Surely it couldn't be everything, right? He still had a personality. The thought of having lived a complete lie his entire existence was the most horrifying shit he could think of. Worse than Vecna and the Demogorgon combined. Robin was helpful though, she kept him from spiraling too much.
Eddie had turned into a recurring problem. Apparently goodie two shoes Nancy Wheeler and King Harrington claiming that Jason was the actual killer and that Eddie was just his cover up was all they needed to exonerate him. Eddie was an amazing liar too, so he sold the story in under a minute to the police. Carver was hurting Chrissy, Chrissy came to him, Carver caught them and killed her in retaliation. But Eddie scaped so he had to improvise.
Apparently half of that wasn't a lie. Munson had confessed to Steve and Johnathan, high as a kite, that him and Chrissy did have some feelings. They never acted on them, but they were planning to when she felt safe enough to leave Carver. That was painful on so many levels... He'd vaguely known Chrissy in school and she was sweet enough, seeing the way Eddie spoke about her made her murder feel so much more painful. What if Vecna had done that to Robin? Or what if he'd actually tried to kill Nancy? But also, hearing from the guy your pining after that he likes girls was just a whole different can of worms. It made him feel awful, being jealous of a dead girl.
Life went on for a while, in that sweet sweet agony. Sharing custody of the kids with Eddie, joking about who was the mum and who was the dad, trying to save up to move out with Robin, becoming actual friends with Byers, having a proper platonic friendship with Nancy...it wasn't so bad. Sure he could never have what he truly wanted, but he and Robin had already planned to be each other beards, their friend group expanded and he could be close to the guy he liked. It wasn't going to be the happy white picket fence he had desperately tried to sell to Nancy in a last ditch effort to remain heterosexual. Not that he was ever going to be truly happy there either.
Things took the most unexpected turn thanks to Byers junior. The five of them were hanging out in the Byers-Hopper residence, their hangout spot since the kids preferred the Wheeler's basement. When Will weakly knocked on his brother's door, Steve did not expect to see him teary eyed on the other side. Soon enough everyone in the room was trying to console poor Will. Steve and Robin were both completely dumbstruck when Will finally opened his mouth to confess. They shared a look of "oh no, what's going to happen?". Steve had already a reassurance in his lips, trying to prevent anyone else making a hurtful comment, when Johnathan hugged him and told him it was okay. Everyone else followed, and now the look he shared with Robin was one of immense relief. He was quick to add on to the support, feeling extremely guilty at the way Byers senior seemed to relax, clearly on the fence about his answer.
Turns out Will was heartbroken due to falling for a straight guy, something that Steve could very much relate to. He wanted to say so but it wasn't the right moment, this was about Will, and no matter how relieved he felt for the Kid and his and Robin's sake, he didn't want to derail the conversation. Nancy and him reassured him that Wheeler was an idiot, and that he wasn't missing much. "You can do better than my brother".
It was Eddie who actually got Will to stop sobbing with a simple question "How do you know he's straight?". Robin pointed out how he had dated El to which Eddie gave the baffling answer of "so what? he could like both!". Johnathan and Nancy were quick to jump on his theory, while Robin and Steve exchanged incredulous stares. Clearly Robin had not known about that, or else she would have told him.
"Is that a thing?" Steve dared to hope, hope that this was not some plot to make Will feel better. "Yeah Harrington" Eddie looked at him with all that intensity he conjured for DMing "I'm pretty fucking sure." They both stared at each other, trying to read the other's face. Looking for a sign, while aknowledging it wasn't the time or place to talk. In the end, Eddie gave Will a ride to the Wheeler's.
Once he and Robin were in the safety of his car it was absolute madness. Robin's final words were "I may not have know that was a thing, but know I know and he was flirting Dingus!". He tried to shut her down, not wanting to get his hopes up, but once he was alone in his hose...that was a different story.
He managed about seven whole minutes of repeating the mantra "just because he's into dudes doesn't mean he is into you" before deciding "fuck it" and gunning it for the door. He needed to know know. Steve opened the door at the same time Eddie closed his van's. After that it was only a couple of long strides, a locked door and Eddie slamming him against it.
"Sorry if I didn't read this correctly but-" Steve didn't let him finish. And sure enough, this time he actually felt it. The butterflies, the fireworks, his heart pumping away like it was about to explode. There would be time to talk things out, figure out what they wanted, but right then and there Steve finally felt alive. And he couldn't care less what his parents thought about it.
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#fruity four#stranger things#platonic stobin#tw queer slur#tw queerphobia#tw homophobia#tw internalized homophobia
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barbie movie rewrite because it was okay but i know how it couldve been better
ya so i've only watched the movie once and actively as i was watching it i was thinking of ways to rework the plot.. and i wrote none of it down after i saw it. but i like this website and i should post here more so here's my nonsense thoughts :)
so couple of main changes need to take place for this movie to work as a proper feminist movie in my opinion. making it perfect or overly nuanced isn't my idea of fixing it; I would much rather improve the fundamental message and conclusion so it isn't a specifically flawed intro to feminism because that is a really valuable thing for movie's in this climate to be.
change 1: alan deserved better!
one of the biggest philosophy's of feminism i believe in is intersectionality. alan is in a very interesting spot in the barbie world which i believe makes him uniquely suited for the movie's core conflict- an opportunity that the writers squandered (number one pathetic character apologist here).
anyways, from what ive seen in the commentary and reactions this movie has, is that like weird barbie, alan is seen as a bit of a queer icon. but instead of his typical pre-movie interpretation of him just being a gay man, ive witnessed many also head canon them as non-binary as well (I'll stick to he/they pronouns for them here!) because of how much he chooses to associate with the barbies over the kens more often than not. i cannot believe that this wasn't explored more in the conclusion.
this leads me into my main argument for alan- instead of simply inspiring the resolution they should've been a much more important key player.
how this might happen starts with the dance off in the third act.
i think that pitting the kens against each other here was a pretty low blow narratively, it really establishes a pretty unfortunate theme for the ending which is just division between the two groups. (the barbie movie is really just misogyny but in reverse and doesn't attempt to fix any of the problems it acknowledges.)
instead of infantilizing the kens -which was fine at the beginning of the movie for shits and giggles but became less funny and more frustrating as the movie went on- i think a much more productive start to the beach dance-off scene could've been alan trying to talk sense into the kens (like gloria does for the brainwashed barbies.) it would have needed to fail at this point for the sake of conflict but it would have brought in an easy applicable solution for our real life equivalent of misogyny into the narrative - men (and those apart of their sphere socially) talking to and checking their fellow peers when they are doing sexist shit
after the barbies take over the supreme court and do their thing we have a bit of tension to resolve still. even though gosling's stereotypical ken (sken) has discovered that he is kenough, that can't be said for the rest of the ken's.
liu's ken #2 (real character name) should probably be the one to try to enforce the patriarchy just because of the preestablished tension. i think it would be a wonderful moment to see sken stand up to him properly here and really acknowledge alan's message here of respecting the other Barbie's as people and friends (shout out ace stereotypical barbie!) rather than objects. additionally they ask for respect in turn (equal representation on the supreme court because that ending was so foul wtf)
also maybe some hand holding action because i am nothing if not a poly sken/alan/ken2 shipper- this is still a tumblr analysis what did you expect)
change 2: ruth shouldn't have been god, barbie should've
barbie becoming human at the end was weird and gross. who would actually want to be human?
i'm sorry but if i lived as an inspirational concept to little girls around the world i think i would've taken that power a bit more seriously.
i'm so glad ruth was included in this movie and she should still play a key part in barbie's crisis and development. but.. instead of being god i think she should've acted more as a guiding spirit to barbie or a silly (possibly vengeful - literally just for fun i have no basis for this) ghost haunting mattel. after all, all of barbie's power comes from being an idea that can persevere throughout generations, and ruth is well... dead.
i think instead of asking to become human when she got agency the conversation shouldve gone a bit more like this :
ruth: what do you want barbie?
barbie: honestly i don't know, is that normal?
ruth: yes honey, (big dramatic monolouge about not rushing to find purpose.. etc)
barbie: after everything that's happened i still dont feel like i belong
ruth : that's okay too. you have all the time in the universe to decide what you want to be, youre in control of your own destiny
barbie: the universe sounds nice actually, but there is one thing i need to do before i go
*she fucking obliterates mattel's ceo and thats how she debuts as god*
not the best but better than her going to the fucking gyno as an ending
minor changes!
I think gloria and sasha should have gotten more development, making them mirror ruth and barbie wouldve been a nice touch. maybe an ending or after credits scene depicting the two of them having a similar conversation to the one i just described would have been silly. (also please take sasha more seriously that girl is right about everything and is listened to only a third of the time she actually gets lines. she could've been an excellent dead-pan comedic foil to the more absurdist jokes of the film, under utilized fave) big opportunity to make that conversation absolutely unhinged too:
gloria: you can be whatever you want in life kid
sasha: *actively pinning up pictures of warner bros ceo david zaslav on a bulletin board with a big red x and looks directly into the camera* I know mom <3
mattel's depiction was barely passable. i have had enough of major companies being posed as villains but keeping them silly and unthreatening- its unfaithful and disrespectful to real life. start them off as silly and shitty, thats fine. it matches the tone of the movie- but as parallels between real life and the movie converge in the third act, mattel should start acting like the predatory company they actually are.
their investment in reinstating barbie as supreme leader over ken despite him making more money in the name of "feminism" would have never in a star death ever happen. literally the entire board only being men was a joke they really fucking made and still had them supporting women- it ruins the entire thesis of the movie and makes the message muddy. fix that, keep them forcefully trying to pair up barbie and ken but change it so its true life: nothing more than an effort to make more of a profit and bring patriarchy to barbieland. this would've brough the climax to an apex and match the stakes to my barbie god conclusion.
anyways yeah i loved the artistic direction of this movie and the casting but not much else! let me know if i missed anything and thx for reading
#barbie#barbenheimer#the barbie movie#greta gerwig#ryan gosling#margot robbie#will ferrell#simu liu#michael cera#ken#kenough#just ken#barbie and ken#barbie 2023#barbie movie#movie commentary#barbie review#mattel#fuck mattel#feminism#feminist#nonbinary#alan barbie#not super expecting this to get traction because this movie ahs been out for two months but whatever
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HELLO HELLO! id like to make a request about AKAZA my BELOVED i can NOT shut up about him,,,, IM REALLY SORRY IF ITS A LENGTHY DESCRIPTION,, ok so ive been thinking about a male hashira who takes akazas offer to become a demon. (call me vanilla but enemies to lovers is the GOOD shit) a small description just for you to envision: same height as akaza. long wavy black hair. light grey skin. blue sclera and pink pupils. Both of them are on good terms at first (fights to the death here and there. just hanging out) but then it starts to get rocky because he feels that akaza is coming on TOO harsh upon him with the obsessive training and fighting to get stronger 24/7,,, like, he wants to do his own thing and not be bound to upper 3 forever yknow? terrorize people and have fun and fuck around. Enter douma. a bastard to be around, but SO VERY ENTERTAINING. Obv hes nowhere near on the moral compass as douma, but hes very fun to hang out with. you can guess how akaza feels about this. Honestly the scene is up to you now! I mainly wanted to see something of akaza finally gaining someone who feels like a 'friend' (unrecognized gay) and discovering jealousy. i love myself some angst btw
Ofc! I hope this has the right amount of angst for you my friend. ( I couldn’t think of a title i’m sorry-)
Akaza x M!Reader
2nd POV
You’ve known Akaza for a few months now. You first met him while you were on a mission to find a lower rank demon lurking around a village, but you found Akaza instead.
Before any fighting took place, Akaza offered you to become a demon and train to become stronger with him. You didn’t really have much in your life and the only thing you really accomplished was becoming a Hashira, So you accepted his offer.
The two of you figured out that you both have common interests and over the years you’ve gotten closer with him. Akaza kept his end of the offer and trained with you to get stronger. He taught you multiple things like how to catch humans and dispose of remains, how to use your Blood Demon Art, fighting skills and ways to impress Muzan.
Akaza has also been training you to fight since day 1 of becoming a demon. Everyday, he makes you train for a certain amount of time or until he see’s you’ve made progress. At first, the training was simple and easy, it was just basic kicking, punching, breaking objects, but as time went on, the training’s became more brutal. You noticed that Akaza was pushing you more than your limits and he would even make you fist fight him even if he was way stronger than you.
And that was the case today. You two were currently “Training” and Akaza wanted you to fight him and push your limits to the max (again). You’ve already been thrown around by him so many times tonight and you couldn’t handle anymore of it.
“Please Akaza, No more for tonight! I can’t take it right now!” you begged him.
Akaza walked up towards where you were laying. You swore you saw him roll his eyes but you were more focused on the pain you were feeling.
“Don’t beg Y/n. Begging is for weak people, and your not weak! Or are you?” Akaza questioned as he stood over you.
You lifted your head to meet his eyes. The words Upper Three carved into his eyes remind you that no matter how hard you tried you couldn’t match his strength. Maybe in a few years when you’ve been a demon longer or have better fighting skills, but not at this moment.
“Well? I’m waiting for an answer.” Akaza scoffed, looking down at you like you were a puny ant, which was how you felt.
You knew weak people made him feel disgusting and you didn’t want him to feel that about you. You wanted him to be proud of you and praise you of how much stronger and better you’ve become.
“I-I can’t. Please.” You tried once again.
Akaza just scoffed and turned away from you.
“I thought you were supposed to be stronger than this! How will you ever be able to defend yourself?” Akaza started to yell.
“Well I don’t need your abusive training to help me get stronger!” you snapped at him.
Akaza whipped his head around.
“Abusive?! My training is the only thing that has gotten you this far Y/n! Without me, you’d be dead!” he yelled back at you.
“Well if I were dead, then I wouldn’t have to feel this pain anymore, would I!?” You yelled back, on the verge of tears.
Akaza looked a little taken back by your reply, but his face expression quickly changed to a mixture of unimpressed and anger. He turned away from you once again and started to walk away.
“Where are you going?” You yelled at him.
Akaza didn’t reply. He just kept walking further and further away. You yelled at him to try and get him to stop, but he either didn’t hear you or didn’t listen. He kept walking until he was out of sight.
You slowly got up from your spot, holding your side, you made your way to a tall oak tree and leaned against it. You didn't even notice the first few tears that slipped out from your eyes, or feel them trailing down your cheeks.
Before you know it, you plopped down onto the ground and started sobbing.
"Why am I so weak? Is it my fault?" You mumbled to yourself.
As you continued to sob and mumbled to yourself, you didn't even notice the pretense that was right in front of you.
Your froze a little, thinking it was Akaza coming back to disown you more, but in reality it was Douma.
"Hey, Hey! Why are your crying? Did something happen?" He asked you, bending down to be level with you.
"Go away Douma, I'm not in the mood." You replied to him, burying your face into your knees.
"Now, now. Why don't you tell your friend Douma what's eating at you? I hate to see a handsome face like yours tainted with tears." Douma replied, sitting down next to you.
You lift your head up and sniffle. You didn't really want to tell Douma but you knew he wouldn't leave until you did. With nothing to loose, you let out a big sigh and explained everything to him.
You told him how Akaza pushed your limits everyday and how tonight it got out of hand. You told him how you guys snapped at each other and how he left disappointed in you. Douma listened to every word you told him, nodding in a way to let you know he was actually listening.
“Now, now dear. I’m sure Akaza is just having a moment. Lord Muzan has been pushing him a bit harder these couple of months.” Douma tried to comfort.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean he throws his stress onto me!” You replied, getting a little angry.
Douma put a finger on his chin and thought for a moment. He looked towards you and suggested something.
“What don’t you and Akaza take some time apart from each other? Just enough until you cool down.” Douma suggested.
“Where would I go? Akaza was the only one who really cared for me and I never found a place to stay during these years.” You replied, looking Douma in the eyes.
“Come live with me! We’ll have so much fun back at my cult!” Douma suggested enthusiastically.
You gave a little chuckle.
“Akaza would kill you if he found out I went to live with you.” You smiled to yourself
Douma laughed aswell.
“He can try~” He teased.
You and Douma talked for a few more hours, either trash about other demons, or making fun of random things. It made you feel better and almost fofrget about the incident that had happened earlier. A couple hours passed and the Sun started to peak over the horizon.
Douma noticed this and stood up from his spot.
“I should probably take my leave. Are you sure you’ll be alright?” He asked once more.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.” You assured.
He gave you a smile and disappeared right before your eyes like some magic act.
You remembered there was a little old cabin a few miles in the woods from here. It was in a thicker part which would allow you to have enough time to walk to it. As you were walking, you could feel yourself being watched by something, but just shrugged it off of as nothing.
You walked for about 30 mins before you reached the old cabin. It had a few holes in the wall but nothing big enough that the sun would peak in.
You walked in and plopped down on an old, dust couch. A dust cloud emerged from under you but you could really care less. You were tired from both training and crying the previous night. Before you could properly fall asleep, you heard someone enter the cabin and call your name.
“Y/n?” Akaza asked.
Your eyes opened and you sat up from your spot to see if it really was Akaza, and it was.
“What do you want” You asked, with a hint of “go away” in your voice.
“I just wanted to apologise.” He said, as he walked over to you.
You made no movement when he came over and sat down on the small spot beside you.
“It’s just been rough lately and were all being pushed more to find the Blue Spider Lily. He tired to explain.
“That doesn’t mean you put it on me!” You snapped and him.
“I know and i’m sorry! I didn’t know why I did it. I know it sounds like a lame excuse but I don’t want anything to happen to you. I can remember something bad happened to someone I really cared for in my human life, and I don’t want that for you.” He tried.
You look up at him and sighed.
“Okay, I accept your apologies, but if you ever do that again I will do what you hate the most.” You teased him.
“Oh yeah? What’s that?” he teased back.
“I’ll live with Douma.” You replied with a smug ass look on your face.
Akaza glared at you before answering.
“I promise you that’ll never happen.” He replied.
You both laughed and you opened your arms to invite him to lay on the couch with you, and he gladly accepted.
“Oh by the way, I did talk to Douma while you were having a hissy fit.” You confessed.
You could hear him groan.
“What did he do? Did he touch you? Hurt you? If he ever take you away from me i’m going to murder him more times than he ate women.” Akaza grumbled.
“Woah, slow down jealous, we just talked for a bit and then he left. He didn’t try anything, I promise.” You assured him.
“I’ll believe you.” he replied.
You smiled.
“Good. Now I am tired as hell and would like to sleep for the rest of this day if you don’t mind.” You said, as you rolled over to face the couch and closed your eyes.
“Alright. I’ll take a little nap with you .” Akaza teased, and he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer.
You giggled at him
“G’night Akaza.” You told him.
“Good night Y/n.” He replied.
You yawned one more time and let the peaceful wave of sleep overcome you.
========================================================
I hope you enjoyed it!
#kny#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#akaza kimetsu no yaiba#akaza#akaza x you#akaza x reader#akaza x y/n#kny akaza#request#akaza x male reader
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Aw, man, any thoughts about Rasticore?
YES HE’S MY GUYY
Ah yes, another example of a the whole running themes with Septarians being this “certain way.” Though, interestingly, unlike Seth and Toffee, he’s not as villainized as they are. Instead he’s literally just turned into the butt of a joke… which still isn’t great.
But I already kind of went into the show stereotyping Septarians as X and X in my Seth post, this is solely about Rasticore my boy and my thoughts on this dude!!
TL;DR: I love him a lot he is way too underrated.
Here’s some headcanons with thoughts mixed in there. (Though admittedly this is basically just Septarsis-Dragonfly AU Lore… but as long as it doesn’t impact the progression of the story it’s fine💀)
Rasticore is Seth’s (only and biological) son. He’s a result of a little fling that was mainly orchestrated to hatch a potential heir. Seth is a (very deeply closeted who’ll scoff if you even mention the notion despite his history of “flings” and “relationships” with men) 100% gay man, and even Rasticore is surprised by his own very existence.
Rasticore is older than Toffee by two decades (it’s not that long for Septarians they’re relatively close in age).
Seth and Rasticore have good standing and a good relationship, but they’re not particularly close
Rasticore IS however, extremely close with his Aunt, Princess Zarina, and handmade her robotic arm when Eclipsa permanently severed it with her darkest spell
The only reason he doesn’t outrank Toffee is because he not only doesn’t have the leadership skills, but also cares a lot less about the war effort than Toffee does. Seth is not the type to give Rasticore a higher rank for the pure sake of being his son, he has to earn it like everyone else. He just particularly didn’t put the work in. The war didn’t spark his interest until the Comet situation
While he didn’t like Toffee for a while as a child/preteen, they became incredibly close in their teenager days and formed a trio with Toffee’s then girlfriend, Ericka. They distanced again after the trio split and didn’t become “close” again until around Comet’s reign. This is all despite the fact that they literally live with each other in the castle.
While Toffee was studying as a historian and planning his destroy magic plot, Toffee’s (now ex) nerdy engineer boyfriend, Favian, designed and crafted Rasticore’s famous dimensional chainsaw (using stolen dimensional scissors). He also made several tracking devices that Rasticore ends up using.
It was around this time that he met Heinous (aka Meteora). Yes, they absolutely 100% dated on and off for a while, keeping it on the down low as a casual thing.
When Toffee volunteered to go to Comet’s banquet, Seth insisted that Toffee take Rasticore with him. This is really where the two men bonded again after all those years.
After Comet’s death and Moon’s spell, he retreated back to Septarsis. It was there that he finally admitted to his father that he was tired of being a “prince” and wanted to instead forge his own path.
He left Septarsis shortly after Toffee, renouncing his title and changing his last name from Kardona to “Chaosus-Disastervaine”
He has both of his eyes and both of his arms, he just uses the gem and robotic arm to better conceal his identity. He doesn’t actually think anyone would recognize him as the “Prince of Septarsis,” but he has to make sure. He also alters his voice sometimes for this exact reason.
He was pretty shocked about Meteora’s true heritage (go figure), but what disturbed him the most was the fact that she not only was Eclipsa’s daughter (he was WELL AWARE of Toffee’s friendship and falling out with her) but also the fact she kind of bore a resemblance to the baby who ambushed their meeting and blasted Toffee in the fact that one time. THAT’S why he skedaddled so quick and broke up with her (only to be blasted into an arm again)
A small part of Rasticore being with the other assassins trying to take out Eclipsa was deeply personal. He knows firsthand that Eclipsa not only took off his Aunt’s arm and killed many other Septarians, but deeply deeply hurt one of his longest and closest friends. Out of everyone there he had the most reason to actually want her dead.
He’s still working at there to this day, but with the arrival of the Echo Creek humans they’re not very popular and business is very slow. Part of him wants to go find a new job, but he’s made friends there who he doesn’t want to leave behind.
Yeah honestly most of these is just his backstory from my AU 💀 whoopsies. It’s hard to separate the two sometimes I just kind of lump canon in with my AU. But yeah that’s the gist of it! I think Rasticore is real cool and he’s one of my absolute favorites.
But then again I stan every single Septarian in this show so I am a heavily biased party
(My favorite Rasticore scene by far)
#svtfoe#star vs the forces of evil#rasticore of septarsis#rasticore chaosus disastervaine#ask#Septarsis Dragonfly AU#I love Rasticore sm#He’s nowhere near Toffee but he’s so cool#I wish the show did more with him#(that wasn’t stereotyping of course)#would’ve loved to see more of him and Meteora#YES I SHIP THEM SUE ME
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Thess vs the Foreign Secretary
Okay, it's time for another round of "UK Politics: A Summary of Shittiness"!
Today, we're going to be talking about David Cameron. Now, David Cameron was once leader of the Conservative Party. He actually got the PM-ship in 2010 in a supposed coalition government with the Liberal Democrats. However, the LibDems let the Tories walk all over them, so we might as well have had just a Conservative government. Anyway, he wound up surviving an election and ending up in a majority Conservative government ... briefly. Then he called for the Brexit referendum. He was apparently honestly expecting it to be a resounding "no", and for people to shut up about it after that. So he didn't bother to set up anything but a simple majority vote about a situation with wide-ranging repercussions, most of which were opaque at best to the average voter. He also let Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage lie through their respective teeth about Brexit without trying to stamp on the misinformation or in fact trying to campaign for Remain in any reasonable way.
...And you all know what happened at that vote. Through the tiniest majority, the referendum was a YES to Brexit. So he kicked off Article 50 right away, because apparently Will of the People. And then, instead of staying to try to clean up the mess he caused, he fucking resigned, so that someone else could clean up his mess.
I mean, there's a whole lot more shit regarding him, but that's basically the most egregious at this point. He lit the fuse, watched the explosion, then walked away instead of helping clear the debris he created.
Fast-forward seven or so years, and we've been through more PMs than I really want to think about right now (Theresa May, Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, and Rishi Sunak), and equal numbers of cabinet reshuffles. Which is where I pause a moment and explain about Suella Braverman.
See, Suella Braverman has been several things that are just ... damning, honestly. First she was integral to the current Brexit mess, as a standing member of the European Research Group (a massively Eurosceptic group which was probably pretty much behind the scenes of the Brexit movement to begin with). Braverman apparently believed in Brexit so much that she became an Under-Secretary of State for Brexit. And then, after a bit of leave, she spent a bit of time as Attorney General before being bumped up to Home Secretary.
She was the one whose "dream and obsession" was sending refugees to Rwanda under the auspices of "stopping illegal migration". She's been an absolute nightmare for human rights, to the point of trying to ban the Palestinian flag in general and claiming that the police are biased against far-right extremist groups because they apparently get arrested less often than peaceful protesters who aren't far-right extremists? I have no idea, but she has been the kind of boomerang bigot that boomeranged so hard she went right into fascism. There have been calls for weeks to get Sunak to sack her. I guess he finally had to listen.
Now, one one hand, this is good because Suella Braverman needs to be about a thousand miles away from the cabinet. So her being sacked is a good thing. However, the rest of the reshuffle ... well.
Okay, first of all, David Cameron is not being made Home Secretary. He's being made Foreign Secretary. No, the new Home Secretary is James Cleverly, who is very keen on Brexit and, when the World Cup was being hosted in Qatar and gay football fans were concerned for their safety, reportedly said that gay people should "show a bit of flex and compromise" when travelling to Qatar because "it's important when you're a visitor to the country to follow that country's customs". Sort of slipped some potentially Islamophobic remarks in there as well, and particularly given how there's been some noise very much against cultures that aren't white and/or Christian coming from those in Parliament lately, it's not ideal. We've honestly just lost one frothingly boomerang-bigoted Home Secretary and replaced her with another boomerang bigot who froths slightly less.
David Cameron dealing with foreign affairs, though? Not liking that idea very much. Honestly, all of the Tories have made such an absolute fucking mess of things that no reshuffle would satisfy me. Then again, at least most of the other newbies are actually MPs; Cameron had to drag his peerage out of mothballs in the shed he's been hiding in to be able to stand in the cabinet.
The one reshuffle that's probably not going to get a lot of attention (because Big Names) but probably should (because Big Conflict of Interest) is that the new Health Secretary is Victoria Atkins. No, not that Atkins, but nearly as bad - her husband runs British Sugar. Now, on one hand, her husband's company does deal with medicinal marijuana and it's possible that said conflict of interest might get medicinal marijuana a little more available. However, I also imagine there'll be a push to get the sugar tax (otherwise known as the Sin Tax) off the table so they could adjust the prices and have the sugar cost the same for the consumer while they got more money.
Either way, Sunak's rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic, and honestly Starmer isn't going to be any better, and I still hate living here. Buuuuuuut Suella Braverman got the sack so I'll just bask in that for a bit.
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