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#he does like helping people out he does. he’s just also emotionally detached so he tallies his favors and good deeds to bring up later if—
mcybree · 3 months
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Ok ok ok I'm not Tryna start discourse but bluestars prophecy was my first ever warriors book and bluestar will always be my favourite so I'm gonna make some counterpoints to you about her being a Smajor character
bluestar has always been led by an intense loyalty and dedication to those she loves and cares for - this includes her mum, her sister, her clan, eventually Firepaw when he joins the clan, and she has a VERY strong moral compass when it comes to doing the right thing - when she sees thistleclaw teaching tigerpaw to hurt a then baby scourge she very much discourages it and is against it
Afaik scott is Not like that, he doesn't have an emotional or love-driven moral code, he does things because they're smart decisions in the long term or because he wants to. Granted I havent seen a ton of his stuff but I have seen his limited life and 3rd life perspectives and he is very much a singular team player there, there to look after himself and well if people align with him that's great he's got allies (jimmy and Martyn) but he won't go out of his way to care for them
Bluestars defiance of starclan in the first series is BECAUSE she gave herself to them and what the warrior code demanded so much - yes she broke clan rules by having kids with crookedstar but she did everything in her power to make sure they'd have a happy life and felt terrible that thrushpelt was willing to say they were his to save her reputation. She didn't do it out of a selfish want, she only ever wanted to help her clan and those she loved, and her becoming clan leader is emblematic of that want. When she rejects starclan so wholeheartedly in the first series it's because THINGS KEEP GOING WRONG WHEN SHES TRIED SO HARD TO STOP THEM FROM DOING THAT - starclan has never cared about the sacrifices she made to keep her loved ones and clan safe, she lost her mother, her sister, her kits, her mate, literally everything, and things STILL KEEP GETTING WORSE. it's not a demand that she deserves to have everything good, it's a cry for help that shouldn't something go right after she's tried so hard???
C!Scott isn't like that. He puts himself above others and inherently believes he will get the best if he just plays his cards right, and he is good at it, he's very competent at lasting a long time in life series and getting what he wants - the ruthlessness of gem driven by desperation kills him in secret life, Martyn's complete fucking about face kills him in limited life, and I'm pretty sure it's etho who gets him out in 3rd life by luck. He doesn't plan to look after the ones he cares about, because he cares about himself first and foremost. Yeah you can argue when he doesn't get what he wants he gets annoyed, but his is less of a 'why don't I get this don't I deserve it' and more of a 'oh fuck this didn't work. Ok new plan double down on getting what I want by appeasing to people cos they're easy to read and therefore account for'
I don't doubt Scott would make a bluestar adjacent character if he made a warrior cats oc BUT his character would honestly be closer to darktail or ashfur than bluestar and that's that on that.
(sorry you activated 13 year old me's unskippable cutscene sjdjsjsjja this isnt meant to be a serious argument I just love bluestar a lot and love talking about her)
OKAY 1. this is fucking awesome thank you 2. i am going to do something new and exciting (advocate for scott instead of beating him to death with sticks) because unfortunately this bluestar info has only made me believe she is a smajor character even more.
As a general note when I talk about smajor characters as a collective here I’m referring to characters more in the realm of esmp/traffic/rats/pirates/etc, less vampire scott or necromancer scott who are intended to be villainous.
Scott characters tend to operate under a “If I am not a Good Person I may as well die” rule, and consequently abide by a strict moral code to keep themselves feeling clean. For instance: traffic Scott will never go back on his word, he will avoid dishonesty, and he won’t take from others unless he is sure that he can repay them. He will never betray his seasonal primary ally (even when they betray him first), and will often give people things just because they asked him nicely. He stakes a lot of his own identity on this, because it is through being a “good person” that he justifies his superiority (and, by extension, his own existence); in his mind he deserves the best and *is* the best because he is such a good person. When things don’t go his way, he thinks he doesn’t deserve it because he has been nothing but good, so he tries to place a reason. He often assumes that somebody must “have a vendetta” against him, even if this somebody is the world (see: him asking if limlife episode 1 boogeyman is some kind of joke played on him for not giving in to the boogey curse in Last Life.) which is very Bluestar to me, convinced that her misfortunes are a divine punishment.
This is all to say that Scott does have a strict moral code and deep sense of loyalty. Being a “good person” and devoted partner in the ways he understands it are so ingrained into what he is that I think he definitely has the capacity to be a Bluestar if he were raised being taught clan values, even if his internal systems are often built around never letting gross emotions be fully felt rather than what those emotions compel him to do.
#ive always wanted to partake in pointless character debate on tumblr#considered maintagging this but didnt want people looking at your ask weird. sorry yall we serve fucked up scott here#“But bree” you might ask “what about pearl? He wasnt a very devoted partner then!”#and to that I say: pearl isnt a person to him. and neither is jimmy. Scott fucked up with both of them and unfortunately if he is not good-#and justified 100% of the time he loses his entire identity so convincing himself that they are incompetent or crazy so that he#doesnt have to self reflect is how he gets by. he would literally rather kill himself than earnestly admit fault for anything#… huh. about the above tags I dont remember the lore but is there any parallel there with the whole bright heart thing#genuine question bc I do not remember why blue star did that and I dont trust the wiki#(Trying to space out names so they dont tag)#I really hope this makes sense btw bc I feel like I usually list a lot more examples… but im tired#I can elaborate on any point here if need be ig. I dont talk about this aspect of him often because the literal entire fandom does already#Every scott analysis post out there is about his damn loyalty… anyways yeah scotts loyalty is transactional more often than emotional but#It’s still loyalty and also. hard to draw the line between where the emotions stop sometimes because he can stop giving a fuck about—#most things on a whim. How much scott genuinely cares about something is a forever undefinable concept#asks#he is genuinely a very good ally to have usually. like jimmy was very much the exception there#he does like helping people out he does. he’s just also emotionally detached so he tallies his favors and good deeds to bring up later if—#someone he’s helped decides to go against him. If that makes sense#sorry man I just keep talking. I love this blue animal…….#thanks for the ask genuinely I love when paragraphs about characters#anyways im gonna pass out and. Shakes myself STOP ADDING MORE TAGSSS i think im so tired man
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shiut · 2 months
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Both danganronpa and even rain code have this underlying but incredibly persisting theme of the cognitive dissonance between one's personality vs their own nature that I can't help but think about a lot.
In my head I tend to call it the "Leon paradox" because he's the first and most obvious character I think of in regards to this, though he's far from being the only one. Despite being an effortlessly talented baseball prodigy, he dislikes doing it and his actual passion is becoming a musician. However, he's pigeonholed into doing something he doesn't enjoy simply because he's good at it and it's a means to an end since it's his only way of getting anywhere.
This gets expanded in dr2. Imposter's dissatisfaction with having to always be someone else. Akane not caring about being a gymnast much at all aside from the perks it gets her. Nagito's disdain for his luck talent that brings him constant misery while also acknowledging that it's the one thing about himself that he can count on the most.
It even becomes a focal point with Hajime, who did everything to fight his nature of lacking a talent. However, Chiaki points out that it's the fact that he has no specific talent that gives him more freedom than any of the ultimates that he admires. Turned out, gaining every talent put Hajime into his own prison, and it's his loss of personality that made him essentially useless.
Even in V3 you have Kaede who actually loves her talent so much that she feels like it's an obsession that affects her ability to socialize normally. Kokichi also seems to have brief moments where he acknowledges that his talent is a huge barrier to being able to actually connect with people and causes his loneliness, but decides that it's a compulsion that's too troublesome to change so he just accepts it.
Shuichi sticks out to me when it comes to this theme. He's extremely good at detective work and will often do it on impulse regardless of reward. However, even just stumbling on his first murder case and solving it before the police could even touch it, he could not cope with the results of the person he'd affected. His emotional sensitivity traumatized him into being avoidant, even using a hat as a literal blinder. He was prepared to die in the first trial in fear of revealing the truth. His compulsion to do detective work even kind of ruined Kokichi and Kaito's plot in ch5, as he got so ahead of himself with revealing the truth that just kind of blurted everything out before realizing that he shouldn't have. His compulsion with detective work even seems to make him comparatively calmer and more focused during investigations than the other protagonists, despite easily being the emotionally weakest-willed out of all of them. He repeatedly keeps falling back into his talent despite the emotional toll it has on him because he just can't help himself. He kind of acts as an example of one of the reasons why Kyoko was trained to be emotionally detached.
Jin actually is very much like Shuichi. He tries to actively avoid detective work because he despises the emotional detachment required for it. You wouldn't even know that he's actually really good at it, but you see glimpses into his skill in the novels where he'll end up figuring things out before even Kyoko does on more than one occasion. I can talk a lot about Jin, but I do get the feeling that one of the reasons why he works at Hope's Peak is because he knew more about what would end up happening there than he let on. He probably could have gotten quite a few things done if he wasn't so insistent on fighting his own nature as a detective.
Very honorable mention to Yui, who turned down an invitation to Hope's Peak for her high-jumping talent in order to pursue her passion as a very mid detective. She might've even lived if she went to Hope's Peak because I'm pretty sure she would've graduated by the time of the tragedy, but at least she died in the most based way possible by rejecting them.
And of course, Junko is a prime example of the detrimental effect of talent. Because of her analytical abilities, she can practically guess everything that's going to happen. Her obsession with despair is a desperate attempt at being mentally stimulated in a society that has let the status quo stagnate to such a critical degree that it's the reason why the very concept of talent had been rotted to this point. Sorry to Kodaka, who has repeatedly said that Junko is meant to be a truly evil villain with no motivation, but he did kind of accidentally give her a motivation in dr0 where we're shown for a fact that without her memories and ability to analyze, she's relatively normal and tame. That is her nature, just a kind of weird girl who wants to be a tradwife and go grow corn somewhere. However, I think it can be argued that what is meant by "pure evil with no motivation" is that she doesn't have any sort of tangible tragic backstory. You can even say it's not her analyst ability alone that caused her madness, since there's plenty of normal non-world-ending analysts. It may simply be that her personality happened to mix terribly with her talent, and that's the nature of what makes her pure evil, because both of those aspects of her are part of her nature that she can not (nor does she even want to) control despite the misery it causes her. She simply learned to love the misery.
Makoto himself is very clear about being bitter about his luck. For the most part, what's apparent to him is that it causes him constant trouble and the good that it actually does for him is so subtle and disjointed that he doesn't even realize it's his luck. However, I think what makes him different from people like Nagito or Junko is his personality. He doesn't obsess like they do, and his optimism makes him bounce back easily. I think his luck even feeds into his personality and, inverse to Junko, it's the unpredictability of his luck that makes him hopeful and optimistic. Since he never knows what's going to happen to him, he had to develop a way to roll with the punches.
The aspect of personality vs ability also carries over to rain code. The master detectives are people who have innate psychic abilities that are seemingly based on their nature, and then it gets refined and specialized based on their personality. Not only does their personality help to refine these powers, but you see that their personalities and abilities often have detrimental impacts on each other.
Halara can't see living things in their postcognition because they aren't good at looking at people. Pucci's ability makes her hearing so sensitive that it's at least partially caused her emotional detachment. Melami not only likes fashion so much that she must wear the clothes of someone to use her power, but she also has to actually like the clothes too. Vivia is constantly fatigued and has depressive tendencies due his tenuous attachment to his spirit.
Former Number One/Makoto are a great example of this sort of destructive feedback loop of cognitive dissonance. You can infer that their empathy and obsession with helping people is what gives them the ability to use coalescence and share anyone's abilities, yet it's the fact that they can do anything that makes them feel like they must do everything. Ironically, the fact that they've convinced themselves that they must do everything makes their ability essentially useless because they end up only working alone. As a result, Former Number One became detached with every emotion except for his obsession, and it's what caused Makoto to ultimately spiral.
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ikamigami · 25 days
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I believe what Dark Sun told Foxy is true.
Maybe it's because of what he said about our Sun not surviving..
This.. I think that this cements it for me that Dark Sun isn't actually that bad.
I mean I think that he's not telling the full truth when he says that he only cares about his own ass.
Cause I think that he cares about something here. In our dimension. Or maybe about someone?
It might be just my wishful thinking but what if Dark Sun feels some kind of sentiment towards our Sun?
Cause when he was watching a bits from the channel it seemed to me as if he saw there something that he maybe wanted to be with his Moon or maybe he just in our Sun something he lost after all these times Moon refused to cooperate..
We were wondering on Discord when I still was active there how Dark Sun would feel about our Sun if he met him.
We didn't have them meeting each other and while Dark Sun didn't state that he hates our Sun for being a punching bag or that he feels a bit sympathetic towards him or that he doesn't care about him at all.. I feel like those little bits show that Dark Sun might actually feel sorry for our Sun.
I mean cause look, he told Moon that he should be worried about Sun and let him know where Sun is.. even though he could just simply say for example "don't worry about your dear Sun, check the lighthouse".. but he didn't. He said "you should be worried about Sun.."
And when Dark Sun was counting people who could built Eclipse - people who knows how to copy paste a personality - and he made a weird pause when he said Sun's name.. people thought that Sun is actually the one who is working with Ruin and helped him bring Eclipse back. But I think that Dark Sun hesitated because of how much our Sun doesn't believe in his own smarts. Sun can copy paste a personality - he did that with Moon's computer.. but remember how he said that it was just dumb luck?
And Dark Sun also said that Sun won't survive the aftermath of Ruin's "thanos' snap thing"..
And him watching their channel - he only later went to the episode with Ruin's interrogation - he was watching one of the games at first..
Doesn't it all seems odd to you? Why Dark Sun would be like that towards our Sun who "failed" in every way Dark Sun didn't?
Shouldn't he be angry at our Sun for being a doormat to everyone? For not being able to stand up for himself? Not being able to speak his mind to Moon?
Does Dark Sun might actually feel sorry for our Sun?
Maybe, and it might be my wishful thinking once again, Dark Sun isn't angry at our Sun because he.. gaah I can't find the right word xp..
Maybe Dark Sun admires, is sentimental about Sun's kindness?
I can't word it out how I want for the love of all that exist QwQ
What I mean is that Sun has this kindness and lots of empathy which is what Dark Sun lost. And I think that maybe Dark Sun feels some sort of grief.. for lack of better word.. it's like he's grieving who he was.
Cause like many people speculated me included that Dark Sun just became so cold, distant and emotionally detached to be able to stay on his ground, to be able to cut off the toxic people from his life - Moon literally and creator and Stitchwraith got killed. He has his peace but at what cost?
I think that our Sun is for Dark Sun a bitter-sweet reminder of what he had to sacrifice in order to achieve his peaceful life. I think that our Sun reminds Dark Sun of how he used to be as if he was looking at his younger self.
You know what I mean? It's similar to when you see yourself in someone else and you see all those aspects of you that were sweet but they're gone and you're not like that anymore. And you can't help it but to feel sympathy towards that person.
I think that the same is with Dark Sun. I think that he feels a little bit of sympathy towards our Sun because of how Sun is still kind and compassionate and forgiving. And Dark Sun used to be like that as well. And now he looks at Sun and can't help but to feel sympathy towards him. And he can't help but to feel sorry for Sun because of how much Sun struggles all because of his kind heart.
And because Dark Sun has a star - and interdimensional star at that - he probably saw things from future and he saw that Sun will try to do something to himself. Or that's what I think is the case.
I might be wrong but for me it can't be a coincidence with the way Dark Sun is whenver he mentions our Sun.
And that's why I think that he might want to try to prevent this from happening. But will he be successfull? Will he be able to convince others to listen to him?
We shall see. I can't wait to see what showrunners have in store for us.
At the end I'll say that I'm really happy to see that Foxy tries to do better as a father of FC this time and that he took FC with him to try and if kid can help with anything awwwww 💗
Also I wonder what are they doing wrong with the way they're trying to bring Solar back.. maybe they need Eclipse's help? Hmmm..
Either way something interesting will happen on April 8th to say the least.. I can feel it.
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anti-endo-haven · 24 days
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honestly thank you for saying that being 'source connected' is not *always* a bad thing. for some it can be bad, yes, but for others its not. for us its sorta in the middle, like, if they fully believe they are source and are boderline delusion / psychotic about it -- then thats bad, but a majority of us who are source connected are just like "haha thats me /silly" and find it hard to watch source cuz of psuedomemories, but thats literally it.
we also came up with different terms to describe our source connected-ness level! (COPIED FROM OUR GOOGLE DOC!!)
✪ Source Connected - Alters who are source connected are alters who are almost fully connected to source. They may consider the person in source to be similar / almost the same to them, they may find it extremely hard to watch source due to memories, and they may not refer to themselves as something separate from source. 
Although many systems consider this to be unhealthy, for us it is perfectly fine as it does not cause issues for us mentally. All alters who are source connected are at the very least a little bit aware that they are not the same person they see in their source and are fine with that.
✪ Source Disconnected - An alter who recognises that they are from a source, but does not care about it. They aren't completely different from source, as they still take the name + form + etc from source, but they don't identify with the actions committed in source. They can still be attached to source in some aspect (i.e: it's a special interest or hyperfixation for the system), but it doesn't regard their identity.
✪ ★ Source Attached - An alter who is somewhat source connected, but is aware and understands that they are not the person they see when interacting with source. They might call the person in source "me", but they don't consider themselves to be the same person. They might also be emotionally connected to source.
✪ ★ Source Detached - A term we created for alters who are basically fully 'removed' from their source. This may be due to the fact the system / alter has little to no memories of their source, or due to the fact the alter just formed with little attachment to it. They can still take the form + name + etc from source, but don't consider themselves to be ‘disconnected’ as they formed detached from source, and ‘disconnected’ implies they were once connected. i myself am source attached because im well aware the guy in the tv isnt me, but hes also me /silly and i love source so much (it's our special interest), but my husband is source connected because he still gets insanely upset about things he did in source, despite knowing hes not source, and he also struggles to 100% separate him from pictures of the guy in the show, and it makes him feel weird to see pics of his source in the wild (but also, we are autistic, and will gatekeep our interests......... )
also.. you can be source disconnected and still use the name from source!! and use a pic from source as your icon / pfp / faceclaim!! its crazy how people think to be source disconnected and you NEED to change your appearance (which they proabbly cant do cuz not all alters can shapeshift / not all systems can change IW appearances easily) and NEED to change your name or else you are DELUSIONAL!!! sorry for rambling i just hate how the did community has made it out that source connected is ALWAYS a bad thing and means you're DELUSIONAL and PSYCHOTIC and NEED HELP!!!!!!!! -🪐🫀
Bewoop! Mainly because I don’t entirely know what all to add but I do want to add something that’s popped into mind while reading this.
Even if an alter is connected to a problematic source, it can still be something that needs to be healed within you.
We have an alter, Eddie, who is from what some might consider a “problematic” source. He’s an introject of Eddie Gluskin from Outlast: Whistleblower and with his healing, he is helping us heal from the misogyny we’ve faced and kept ourselves in and is a primary factor for us finally having the motivation to heal our more feminine sides to be more comfortable in a body that we fairly enjoy.
Just wanted to say that as a means of things.
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charalysis · 9 months
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Darksiders: Strife
As a third entry into my Darksiders series, let's discuss Strife!
Of the Four, so far, he's the one we know the least about, even with the inclusion of the book and comics as a source. What we do know, however, is that he's the funny one of the gang. He's snarky and cracking jokes, with some snark sprinkled in. He's essentially the rogue of the group, using ranged weapons (ie guns), as well as daggers for melee if needed.
Strife has also been shown to be a bit temperamental, following Fury in quickness of frustration. He's also straight to the point when he has to be and can even be rude. His rudeness and brashness is particularly noticed when interacting with Death in Abomination Vault, in which he points a gun at Death.
Its not the first time he's threatened his brother's either, having threatened to shoot War to death if he didn't calm down after a rampage, resulting in War's arm being cut off.
And finally, Strife is shown to be the most empathetic of the Four. He feels immense remorse for killing his fellow Nephalem, and he cares a great deal for humanity, wanting them saved and Fury to see them as more than what does at first.
Strife's certainly the most emotionally expressive of the Four, which balances out when paired with the brother he's closest to, War. The two often butt heads, especially around the Council and Nephalem, but they help each other very well. Strife listens to War's more thought out advice and Strife helps War learn to joke and relax a little.
He expresses grief and remorse far more often and easier than the others as well, finding the fact that their people were killed by their hands very distressing. It even angers him when War seems dismissive or detached about it. Connection and community actually seem to mean something to him, especially given he chooses to hide amongst humans on Earth.
He seems to have a great respect, even love for mankind, defending them to Fury (as Jones) and living amongst them in Ulthane's tree. He cares for them and wants them to survive the apocalypse deeply.
He may also be the most introspective of the Four.
War doesn't see passed his singular goal of preserving the Balance easily and needs significant guidance to see truths. He almost tries to not see the truth at times.
Fury is egotistical and hot headed, refusing to see her flaws and faults until she's been significantly beaten down. She's blind to her own fragility and weakness.
And Death, whos relationship with Strife I want to inspect more of here, can't see outside himself, his feelings, and how he wants to run things. Death can't conceptualize the future either, too lost in his past and grief.
Strife looks at himself to see where he's messed up and he acknowledges it. He tries to be better than he was and can recognize where he has to improve.
However, he can end up just as lost in the past as Death.
Like Death, he mourns their lost brethren. He regrets destroying them and he also regrets other deaths he caused. In Genesis, he finds an item in Mammon's Hoard that triggers what seems to be a panic response. We later learn the item is tied to his past and tells War there's a lot he's not told him about himself. Strife seems to be pretty impacted by his last, but is unwilling to share it, meaning its too difficult to bring up, or he's worried his brothers won't support him and help him. Its similar to Death's reaction to hearing about the discovery of the Grand Abominations and his need to handle things alone.
Strife also seems to hide these deeper feelings with humor, snark, and by amping up his personality to 100 so others just think he's an idiot or unaffected by things. His openness around War seems to be a product of their bond however, as War frequently tries his best to comfort Strife, specifically trying to reassure him that he isn't who he was and he can change for the better. Strife seems to take this to heart.
Also like Death, he wears a mask to hide himself. In Death's case, the symbolism of his mask his a bit different to Strife's, as Death's is a mask that helps him hide from others and keep him from being vulnerable. Death's mask is as much a piece of his past as the Nephalem.
Strife's mask covers a lot more of his head and face than Death's mask, and his armor completely covers his body too. We don't actually know even what Strife's skin color is. All we know is his eyes seem to be yellow based on the helmet's glow.
Strife's mask to me says, "You can't know me, I won't let you know me". It also shows a lack of trust in others, perhaps related to his past. And I genuinely believe he doesn't trust people. Perhaps he trusts War and Fury, but certainly not Death or the Council.
The Council is an obvious thing to mistrust, but Death... Death seems odd right? Well no.
Death has hidden a lot from his fellows and Strife is aware of that. Death has hidden world ending information from them for his own comfort and hasn't consulted his brothers about it, or even let them in on it so if shit comes up, they can be aware and not caught off guard. Death is also very prone to running off in his own without warning.
To Strife, its possible Death has proven himself to be a liar and very unreliable. His distaste for Death is further shown when Death is telling them to stay behind and let him handle the Abominations. He outright aims his gun at Death (despite knowing it'll do basically nothing) and threatens him and demands an explanation, one Death refuses to give.
Death and Strife are also pretty similar in their handling if grief and emotions. Bury it and hide behind a mask and snark/comedy. And so another reason Strife me be antagonistic with Death is he dislikes seeing the person he could be if he simply released his morals and was more self focused.
Strife genuinely seems to want Fury and War to grow as people, to be happy. And yet from what we have seen so far, he's not too interested in Death's personal growth or if Death is better.
Another thing to note is he seems to be the most progressive in terms of adaptability. This can be noted in his appearance and weapon use. Overall, Strife honestly looks a little out if place next to his armored, melee weapon brothers. He looks a bit more like he fits a bit into a stealth game set in the seminear future, rather than a hack and slash fantasy. Strife uses guns, much more modern weapons than that of a great sword, scythe, and whip. That's not yo say the weapons aren't as impressive as his brothers, oh no.
Mercy alone is fascinating, being a four-barrell, one handed shot gun with auto replenishing ammo (though the presence of shells on Strife's belts implies he can change ammo types).
Strife is also adept at using daggers, as we see in Genesis, though he does prefer his guns, seeming to prefer to maintain distance. From these things about his combat, and how dodgy he is around his past, we can infer Strife was possibly a scout at minimum, or an assassin, or possibly some kind of intelligence agent.
Overall, we know little canonically about Strife and his presentation in the canon is inconsistent at best. I hope to see a game focused on Strife in the future so we can better understand him.
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4dkellysworld · 3 months
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Heyyy so I want to realize self but I find that I forget I am not my body or mind. When something “bad” happens I remember I am not this body or mind and detach but when something “good” or “exciting” happens I get emotionally invested and forget it’s not really me. How do I remember that I am not this body when I have those “inherently good” moments
I am (body+mind) naturally such an emotional person, empathetic, and sensitive.
Yeah I get it. It's just something you need to make a habit of - not identifying with life or things just because it gets "good" or "exciting", it's still part of the illusion. Next time something like that happens, you could try the exercise I described in this - it can be used to release the "good" emotions too. Just watch the sensations as the witness, the character/mind/ego/body is experiencing all this, not you. Also stop labelling yourself as ______, detach from the label of being such and such a person. Detach from all labels. Detach from the person, it is not you :)
Also, I think this might help others who don't recognise that the "positive" is to be dropped too (he talks about pride but this can be applied to anything "positive" too such as emotion or experience):
The pride regarding negative qualities can be left fairly easily, but it is not so in the case of pride regarding good qualities. Nobody wants to admit that he has committed any error, but the pride that one harbors when he has given meals to thousands who have visited the four holy places, or opened lodging for holy people, or worshipped the deity millions of times, becomes so firm in him that it becomes almost impossible to give up. It is when one recognizes one's worldly ways and is ready to relinquish them that he soon finds a Sadguru. However, the one who is sought after by everyone for performing many good deeds, gets so deeply buried in the flattery that is showered upon him, that his way to the Sadguru becomes lost due to his pride. Realizing this, one must conclude that pride about bad qualities is tolerable, but the pride about good qualities is best to be avoided completely. Both the pride about one's good qualities and pride about one's bad qualities are thorns on the path to Self-Knowledge. When one thorn is pulled out with the help of another thorn, there still remains the second thorn (pride of good actions) that one carries around in the shirt pocket. Will this thorn not also prick the chest or rib? If a thief is shackled by iron handcuffs and a king by golden handcuffs, does that mean that the king is not bound? from Chapter 1: The Importance of Self-Knowledge - Master Key to Self-Realization by Siddharameshwar Maharaj
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gvndhams · 5 months
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soudam lawyers au I made up when I played berry in radium girls (I'm normal abt them)
Kaz and gundham are on opposite sides of a case right, and it's a pretty like important televised case, which they're both enjoying for publicity reasons, but it's also pretty emotional.
Kaz is trying to stay detached and only do his job, sorta just working towards his own best interest because he's under a lot of pressure from 1. his parents and 2. his new wife to uphold everything, and doesn't want to let anything on to the public that could ruin his image or disappoint his family.
Gundham is very emotionally involved in the case and isn't afraid to vouch for what he thinks is right (within reason ofc). He doesn't have many people in his life (he never had many friends and his mother passed away), so it's not an issue to uphold his own beliefs without fear of judgement from who he's close with
So during this case they flat out don't like each other. Gundham disapproves of how Kaz treats the case so casually because gundham believes that it should be treated with care, even if it's a means to make money. Kaz thinks that Gundham us too stuck up in his own beliefs and it's annoying how much he cares because it makes it harder for him to do his job when the other guy is way too involved.
They end up meeting each other in public outside of work at a grocery store and just side eye each other while they shop on the same aisle. They end up looking at the same thing and Kaz just turns to him and says "I don't like you." Gundham turns back kinda thinking like who does this guy think he is but just says "I don't like you either." from there they keep making small comments at each other until eventually Kaz storms away.
Little meetings like this keep happening every now and then as the case gets even more intense and goes on for longer and longer. They learn more about each other little by little, and Gundham seems to find Kaz fascinating, he thinks his outlook on life is interesting and can't help but want to know more, always coming up with little questions to ask him when they see each other again. Kaz starts to feel strangely about Gundham, wondering why on earth he looks foward to meeting him so much. He has almost everything he could want in life, a food job, a loving wife, parents who care about him-- all that's left is a child, but for some reason he just wants to be close to this man he's supposed to hate.
Things continue, but as Kaz and Gundham get to know each other their disdain turns into more of a playful rivalry. They learn from each other, Kaz starts to genuinely care more about his work and find things in it that he couldn't before, and Gundham finds things to enjoy outside of work so that he doesn't cry over every little lost thing in a case.
However, Kazuichis entire family hates Gundham. Whenever anything about the case shows up they all start shit talking him. Kaz tries to subtly defend him but he can't say much because they are on opposite sides of the case and he doesn't want to disappoint anyone.
Tension starts brewing more as the case starts to wrap up, Kaz and his wife are fighting more, they're constantly unhappy with each other, Kazuichi slips up sometimes which makes his parents angry, and he ends up just being miserable. One night after a particularly large fight, Kazuichi leaves the house and sits at the park for a while, and he finds Gundham walking a puppy. They sit and talk for a little while just kinda venting their frustrations and hanging out, and Kazuichi tells gundham how he feels like he just can't do it anymore, how everything is so stressful and painful, how he wants to run away. Gundham tries to comfort him and let's him hold the puppy for a while, then they part ways.
In the next few days the case comes to a close, Gundham wins. Kazuichi is a little upset but not quite bitter, it feels like a massive stress will be lifted off his back. They have a small conversation after the last trial and Kaz realizes "shit I think I'm in love with him" which he hadn't even thought of before. This kinda crumbles him because he knows he's already in deep shit with his family for losing and he can't handle this alongside it.
Long story short there is a massive fight between him, his wife, and his parents. Lots of things are said that weren't for so long and now it's too late. His wife wants a divorce and his parents want no contact. In short-- his life is over. He leaves the house to process his emotions and runs into Gundham and the puppy again.
Gundham is happy to see him and the puppy runs up to him, but Kazuichi is nearly in tears. Gundham notices and instead of trying to talk to him he takes him back to his house which is luckily nearby. They sit in silence for a bit and Gundham gets him some food and water and makes sure he's comfortable, all the normal things, and eventually Kaz starts talking. When he starts he doesn't stop and it just keeps going and he starts crying mire and more until he's just curled up in a ball on the couch with tears and snot dripping down his face. He ends his giant tangent by looking and gundham and just saying "and I think I'm in love with you."
Gundham looks at him and doesn't know what to say, but reaches out and holds his hand and starts to tear up as well. He opens his arms and let's Kazuichi lay in them while he tries to comfort and encourage him, although he's never been the best with that. After a few minutes they get to talking again, and they decide that while everything is out of hands with Kazuichi he can stay with Gundham and they can take things from there, they go on a few dates to see if there's any kind of spark and there is.
In the end, Kazuichi ends up cut off from his family, which is a struggle but he learns to live with it. He gets mental help and learns to cope with differthings, and Gundham stays with him. Gundham opens up and becomes a bit more social, still learning to enjoy people (as much as he can) and rebuild some of the childlike wonder that he used to have.
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thedecoy-if · 1 year
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Considering the MC was basically another parent to their younger brother growing up, I could see them being very good with children 🤔
Out of curiosity, how would the various LIs react to seeing the MC encountering a lost and crying child and immediately entering big sibling/parent mode trying to console and cheer up the kid, then enlisting the LIs help in reuniting the kid with their family?
Taleea: Taleea worked as a Healer for a long while, so she knows how to comfort and care for children. She has a natural instinct due to what she can do, so she'd be just as insistent on finding the child's parents as MC. Plus, she thinks kids are cute haha! She'd treat them like a lost bunny or something.
Azriel: would actually be on-board. His past has a lot to do with abandonment and familial issues so he'd feel closely connected to the child, however brief the interaction may be. Outwardly, he'd treat it with detachment and brush it off as: "This is a waste of time but whatever you say." Ha. He doesn't like letting people know something has impacted him emotionally.
Drenwin: Drenwin likes kids and adventure so he'd also be on-board. He'd try to cheer the child up with jokes and treat it like a little make-believe thing they're doing so the child doesn't panic.
Namara: Namara is a bit less...willing, but more because she isn't good* with kids. She would want to help as it is the right thing to do, but she doesn't know how to act around them that well.
Vale: Does Not Like Kids At All. They'd groan and huff and say "fine" and would make the effort to find the parents just so they can get the situation over with. Vale's interests all include things not suitable for children and they're a ruthless pirate captain so it makes sense they don't know how to handle them!
Ceris: Would be all for it as they feel like it's an obligation to help others and they made that vow. They'd be fully dedicated to finding the parents and get attached quite quickly.
Arwen/Arya: Would fall into the 'temporary' parent very quickly. They would tease MC for being so attached and warmhearted but they'd tag along not only for fun but to do some good. They'd make a lot of jokes and try to buy treats for the kid and just try to make it like some fun outing ha.
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pricklypear1997 · 1 year
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This is gonna sound so cringe, but I think the reason why for 7 years of reading ASOIAF, I was in denial about the subtle hint of Arya and Gendry’s budding romance is because I relate so much to Arya and I’ve always been fighting against the thought of love, intimacy and marriage because I too have felt like it’s been pushed on me since I was a child… seriously. I know we live in the 21st century, but people love forcing heterosexual romance (and romance in general, even) down their children’s throats. It’s more common than people admit, it’s just more subtle these days. As a young woman, I’ve always been told and expected to grow up one day and fall in love (with a man specifically) and have children later in life. I have seen and experienced a lot of things no child should and I have detachment issues as well as very poor self esteem. Like Arya, I feel ugly and have ptsd as well as severe depression. The idea of trusting another person, being intimate and in love with them is terrifying for me. I read Arya’s chapters and I see a traumatized girl who’s lost her family, has seen cruelty face to face, has had to kill in self defense and has been told her whole life that her freedom, feelings and body are not worthy of respect and protection. She’s also at war with herself and her identity (something I too very much struggle with in result by being adopted by a narcissistic emotionally abusive parent of a different background than me), so how can someone so unbalanced, scared and unhealthy like herself be ready to fall in love? It has to come out, in her own time eventually. It’s a hard lesson I’ve had to learn, but all humans long for companionship and family. We need it. It’s wired in our brains to find it, no matter how much we protest. The problem is when others constantly force it and create expectations that make us feel constricted and trapped. Arya needs to feel free, (I need to feel free). Gendry makes Arya feel free. He accepts her for who she is, wholly. He appreciates all her unique qualities and difficult personality to an insane degree, and that right there is true love. She also seems feel the same way for him, but unlike him, is so unaware of it… I want this romance to grow slowly. Let it simmer for a while. Don’t make them get together immediately. Arya still has a lot of healing to do. To an extent, I wish for something like this to happen to me in the future. Reading the series makes me hopeful. Reading about a character I deeply relate to on another level does help me understand myself better, and I appreciate George R R Martin for writing such an awesome dynamic character like Arya… I couldn’t thank him enough. All the characters he writes are very interesting, even the ones I despise and I feel we can all and should self reflect and learn from a Song of Ice and Fire.
A reminder; Read the books, forget the show.
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puppyocto · 19 days
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ok hi im writing the evo jimmy and martyn thoughts in here because i don't trust the tumblr replies stupid character limit. (please bare with me ive rewritten this like eight times trying to make it make sense)
so around the middle of the series the server members fight the ender dragon and get separated for awhile (according to jimmy he hadn't seen martyn "in three weeks" but alot of the people also assumed he was. Perma Dead which seems like a short amount of time to accept that a missing person was dead but sure man whatever).
martyn shows back up a little after jimmy does and jimmy builds a new base for them, to which martyn expresses relief because (i think this is the exact quote but no promises) "i can't live alone, i don't know how to cook or anything like that--"
they give themselves a new team name and everything and it seems like things are gonna go back to normal. except they dont? martyn shows up noticeably less and less in jimmy's videos after this point until the end where he only turns up for big group events. he's not like. Rude to jimmy or anything and i guess if you're willing you can make the argument they're still living together and just not hanging out in the videos we see but to me it's kind of a massive jump going from the beginning of jimmy's evo where martyn was always there.
and please bare with me here because. alot of this is based on pre-formed thoughts from how he acts in the life series. but martyn is very much someone who needs to play the role of provider in a relationship otherwise he feels like he's not "good enough" and detaches himself. in my mind it's like. up to this point him and jimmy were always happy to play this "you lead, i follow" dynamic until the dragon fight makes him realise that jimmy doesn't Need him to survive and it scares him off a little bit. ++ something something about the snowy mountain "slapped around" conversation and martyn taking the initiative to open up to jimmy again when he recognizes that jimmy needs help (but reacting badly when jimmy doesn't respond the way he wants)
so what im saying is essentially i think jimmy/martyn isn't a. Bad relationship so to speak but I don't think it was necessarily sustainable (at least not with the dynamic they were in) and jimmy is not only never prompted to fight for his own independence (because he never needed to with martyn, like w/ the xbox/ps thing lmao) but he is shown that (albeit not directly) dependence on your partner is Good and if you drift too far emotionally/physically/etc then they'll just stop talking to you ✌️ (because jimmy would never assume something like that is his beloved's issue, it's always him that's the problem and even if he doesn't believe so during evo I'd think that thought pattern being reinforced in everything after would make him retroactively believe that)
sorry uhhhhhh tldr yeah i agree with you
This is so interesting I love this so much. It’s really interesting that Martyn suggests he’s dependent on Jimmy and then seems to slowly abandon Jimmy. I don’t have a lot to say but I will definetely be using this to inform my Jimmy analysis
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coentinim · 9 months
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Innocent characters and how they would treat someone traumatized
Charles... he has a lot of his own personal baggage. He's arguably the most traumatized in the story, and when he commits heinous acts, he just mutiliates his own soul further. So if he has to take care of someone deeply traumatized, he would not know what to do. He'd likely distance himself as much as possible, but if he really had to help, he would offer his medical knowledge. While he does find the situation relatable, he will NOT open up about his own abuse or how he hates his job. He will talk about unrelated topics he enjoys, like medicine, favourite foods or maybe happy childhood memories that aren't too emotional for him. Geniuenly wants to make you feel better but has no idea how. Also depends on his mood.
More utc
Marie's unhelpful emotionally. I don't know if she's a psychopath or something, but she does not feel remorse for any of her actions, so I'm going with this term to simplify (I might analyse her deeper one day). Marie will not be kind to you if you're traumatized. She herself is a victim, and an abusive mother. I read that as symbolic rather than "real", but she gives 0 fucks about her child's safety. She might give you some advice or maybe give you money for support. She's more likely to kill your abuser than anything else.
Who else, who else... Anne-Marthe does not help people out. She uses them. If being curt to you benefits her, she will be curt. If it's better to fake kindness and understanding, she will do so. She's very cold in her manipulation. So she will make you dependent on her. It's not in her interest to make you mentally healthier lmao.
Dad- uh, Jean-Baptiste is similar in a sense, but he's not as manipulative. He might try to manipulate you, but it's not as severe. He is a very distant figure, so he'd likely react like Charles - distance himself. But if he does help, he probably gives you advice in that stern fatherly tone. And he scares you, he's scary, but it doesn't matter because I hc that he has this calm, stoic aura about him even if he's insane. So he can have a grounding presence I guess, but he's reluctant to actually help. He will patch almost anyone up without question though. (I was joking with the daddy I don't have hots for this moth man I swear)
The most helpful on this list is probably André. Even though he's very anxious and doesn't know how to help, he would listen well and try to find a solution to any problem. He would open up about his own trauma too! He tries to help a lot, but he's ridiculously clumsy about it, and can make it look like it's him venting instead. But he's still the most eager to help and actually become friends.
Louis would definitely just vent. He can hold your hand once I guess, but he IS a king, he can't just make people feel better, he has duties and all. I guess he would give money and look with sad eyes, contemplating your tragedy for a week before another tragedy shows itself to him.
I could only see Antoinette being helpful in a modern au (even then she wouldn't care all that much, we see a modern au in canon and she's no different) because in canon she wouldn't really care for longer than a few minutes. She would treat it like rich people treat a photo of a starving child. She might throw money at you or just watch how poor and sad you are from a distance. I love her, she has no malitious intents, but she's too detached from reality.
Subyss is the one who traumatized you, period. He has no desire to help and he doesn't. Or no, wait, you could get drunk together and complain about stuff, or start a bar fight (I kinda want to hit him idk he's infuriating). But it's not healthy coping so I'm not counting that.
You know who came to my mind? Zero. They are shown to bring light and joy to people's lives, and I can see them being a good listener who would share their food with you. They're just very, very weird to talk to since they have weird communication habits and a skewed perception of reality. But they would definitely better anyone's mood.
Note: My first time posting something I imagined and wrote. Not a reblog, not a comment, my own hcs. So I was very anxious about it lmao.
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deerlirium · 8 months
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I love will he’s such a complex character. I rewatched twotl and he really does just shove them both off that cliff. And it’s like yeah maybe he did it so they would be together forever or something but maybe he also did it because he knows for either of them there is no coming back from it and he’s always been far more empathetic to the world than Hannibal. And he can’t let either of them continue being in the world, especially not together, because that would spell complete disaster for so many of the people they come across. It’s his final admission that what he and hannibal have done together is beautiful that also kind of seals their fate to die because he can’t live without hannibal, but he also can’t live with himself if he doesn’t do anything to stop hannibal. Wills internal turmoil has always been largely about his distress that he is so talented at thinking like a killer that he basically might as well be one, being in situations where he is forced to kill it comes naturally to him and doesn’t affect him the same way it affects other people. He’s lying when he tells abigail that killing is the ugliest thing in the world and he’s scared of how much of a lie that really is. I’ve always liked to imagine that that’s specifically why he became a profiler; in his head if his job is to stop killers, maybe it will fix him and he’ll stop thinking so much like one. But really all it does it put him in the perfect position to meet and be manipulated by Hannibal lecter, whose goal it becomes to show will what he is missing out on and to coax out the killer that he knows is inside. And partially will is genuinely being gaslighted and manipulated but he’s also on some level aware of what is happening (at least after a certain point) and allowing it to happen. And after the end of 3a his marriage to molly is kind of this desperate attempt to be like “see, I’m normal and I can live normally” and recover from hannibal, but he knows the truth is that nobody ever will know him like hannibal does and he will never fully be himself unless it’s with hannibal. So he’s stuck in this life that he doesn’t mind but that he’s not fully happy and not anywhere near fulfilled with (not that he doesn’t love molly or her son, just that it’s not the same) trying to prove to himself and to everyone else that he doesn’t need hannibal and he doesn’t need to think about killing people to get by. And then jack asks for help and he has to see hannibal and he spends all of 3b finally coming to terms with the fact that he can never truly be himself unless it’s with hannibal, and that he is capable of and enjoys violence like hannibal does and that he can be happy and fulfilled but only if it’s with hannibal, and only if they are killing people together. So when he and hannibal finally kill dolarrhyde it’s literally the happiest he’s ever been in his life, the most satisfied and the most at peace. And that’s also when he decides once and for all it has to end here, because what they did to dolarrhyde is quite literally only the tip of the iceberg of what they can and will do if they stay alive together. And while will can finally admit to himself the beauty they both see in violence, he is not a psychopath or at least as emotionally detached as hannibal tends to be. A lot of will is sacrificing his own mental, emotional and physical well-being for other people, so it makes sense that his final response is to fall off a cliff with hannibal. Can’t live with him, can’t live without him, can’t live with himself if he lets either of them live and wreak havoc wherever they go next.
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peony-pearl · 2 years
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I’m still going through The Promise but I’ve finally articulated one thing that I’m so mad about
Zuko really started withdrawing from the support group he FINALLY made after after everything he went through just to begin seeking out Ozai’s advice??? His father who BURNED HALF OF HIS FACE??? The man he tried so hard to impress for two and a half seasons until he finally accepted he didn’t need him?? and then he found his worth in others loving and supporting him and giving him advice and he just??? THROWS IT AWAY IN THE YEAR BEFORE THE RESTORATION MOVEMENT???
Also his behavior towards the guards and even to Kori and her parents feels like we’ve missed a LOT of context for his downgrade; there’s no buildup to his change in behavior because it cuts to ‘1 year later’ and he’s acting paranoid about assassins (even if there had already been attempts on his life, Zuko has been in worse situations. I can understand that he’s the Fire Lord now and he deserves to sleep peacefully and have guards; but he’s also THE FIRE LORD and a capable warrior and knows how to protect himself and blaming his guards comes off as old Zuko behavior) and then when he tells Morishita ‘I should burn this place to the ground’ for something ONLY KORI IS GUILTY OF sounds... wildly excessive.
Saying ‘I should burn this place to the ground’ comes off to me as an Ozai line in terms of context; Zuko, by now, should have learned to understand to listen to other’s pov’s; yes the colonies need to be addressed, and what Kori did wasn’t right, but a year after the agreement the work is obviously VERY sloppy.
Even if Zuko doesn’t have the Gaang and if Iroh is in Ba Sing Se (who we know would drop EVERYTHING to go help Zuko if he knew he needed it), giving Zuko some new support system just wasn’t in the equation?? Mai pops up to remind him she’s his girlfriend and is the first to be like ‘ay you look awful babe wtf’ and she’s the first character I see legitimate GROWTH from post-series. She’s showing true concern and care for Zuko and it’s sweet to see her acting out of love instead of being detached, it feels like she’s actually accepting her own emotions and I LOVE that! Sadly, it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere bc I know she ends up breaking up with him.
But like, does Zuko not have any kind of new support system? New aids or consultants or even friends that he’s made in his new time as Fire Lord?
Or even JUST friends? Azula had Mai and Ty Lee; we never saw Zuko with friends until the Gaang (I don’t count Mai and Ty Lee bc they were there on account of Mai being his eventual girlfriend and Ty Lee was there bc of Azula) and it’s kind of sucky to see he’s still just alone after everything he’s dealt with. Zuko has been isolated in so many ways for so long, putting him back in that situation just to show him emotionally rotting does NOTHING but regress that huge arc he endured and does a disservice to him.
But no we have to watch him slide backwards, and while it’s not a bad thing to have characters have a regression moment, Zuko kind of already had his in Crossroads of Destiny. Zuko was forced to go backwards on people all over again and it’s OLD now.
Let. The characters. GROW.
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Can I have 5 and 18 for all ur steps, if ur up for it?
Ooo these are interesting ones.
5. How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?
Ace: The most likely to go as far as it takes in the moment, and then regret it afterwards. He’s very emotion-driven, so he barrels through obstacles, but does have moments after the fact where he regrets some choices. He’s drawn the line at murder, but it’s not off the table if people get in his way. His biggest hurdle is going to be Chen if things go south…
Erin: She’s a terrible villain, honestly. She’s just not cut out for it (never really lost her hero urges). She doesn’t like hurting people most of the time, she won’t kill innocents or other heroes. Push come to shove, she’s the most likely to sacrifice her own wants to help others.
Wren: Draws the line at outright murder, but anything below that is fair game in her eyes. She’s only gotten this far and survived this long by being willing to push through, doing things she wouldn’t have done before Heartbreak.
18. is your OC more cold and detached, or up close and personal?
Ace: Absolutely up close and personal with pretty much everything. Refusing to back down with Chen, expecting to call his bluff in the alley. Jumping headfirst into fights and chaos. He’s impulsive and has a drive to prove himself.
Erin: She likes to think she’s cold and detached from the world, but is leaning a lot more towards up close and personal. Despite being a tactician, she’s usually flinging herself into trouble (hello self-destructive tendencies!)
Wren: Of the three, she’s the one skewed closer to cold and detached. Removing herself emotionally is how she’s learned to cope with -easier to bury everything under ten layers then process emotions. She also doesn’t like fighting, she doesn’t get the same rush the other two get, so she doesn’t see a problem with keeping at a distance.
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ethereallyjade · 1 year
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Namjoon When Upset
(Mostly) Mars Analysis
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Chart Masterlist
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For starters, let's look at what made him upset in the first place
Pride, especially with who he is and where he’s from (very prideful over his nationality, source of education, etc.)
Anything regarding loyalty. Does NOT take betrayal lightly
His loved ones and their safety. So help you if you come for his loved one (or if his loved ones come after him). He’s especially sensitive to them in every way
Having that said, because he’s only comfortable showing his deepest self to his loved ones, they can be the exact people he projects/emotionally dumps on even when his anger has nothing to do with them in the first place.
He’s also deeply hurt when his feelings are ignored or put down in any way, especially when done by someone important to him.
Now for how his anger manifests
If not already insanely obvious, dudes passive aggressive AF. and can be very petty as well. If not put under control, he can become whiny, hypocritical, and manipulative when upset with a tendency to assume he’s right.
Could be prone to crying when angry and/or makes sure you will. If you do him dirty enough, he will constantly remind you of what you did lol.
Despite his sensitive nature, he can easily detach from his emotions and become very cold when feeling vulnerable or that he’s wasting his time on someone/something. If we’re talking about a situation where he's like REALLY pissed, he can become brutal, immediately closing himself off to others and cutting people out of his life indefinitely.
He stays pretty quiet about his problems and is unlikely to speak about it for a while, which usually means his anger comes out in bigger ways than it was initially felt.
He tends to lose himself in his career as a means to distract himself from, well, honestly any overwhelming emotion really. The type to disappear for years after you dump him and then suddenly come back a millionaire.
May use jokes and sarcasm as a weak form of communication and coping mechanism. He wants to connect when he feels scared or hurt but is so resistant to letting others help him.
Because of his scorpio placements especially, it’s no surprise that he feels things very deeply and passionately and this includes his anger. He knows how intensely his anger comes in and easily consumes him, which is why he runs from it, because he fears himself. More often that not because he fears hurting others. He instead directs his anger inwards onto himself and because this anger is desperately trying to find the surface, it comes out as passive jabs.
When used more healthily, his anger shows through art and competition(being the best at whatever he sets his mind to).
A little NSFW, but I’m also seeing another big way he channels his anger is through s*x, but I'll touch back on that in another post.
For the most part he tries to just ignore his feelings and keep quiet, but again, it never works and often results in him becoming very moody.
In the end, if he sees the problem worth being resolved, he will communicate in a fair way and tries his best to choose his words carefully so each side is thoroughly heard.
But be warned, he rarely forgives and never forgets.
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kindan-no-kanojo · 8 months
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🪶. Independent Verse
Default, alternative verse for interactions with other muses. Unlike the Canon verse, instead of taking place after the Forbidden Voracity story ends, the Independent verse happens before it starts.
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Summary
Scarlett managed to escape her situation as a servant and continue on her own. Ghouls had broken into the manor while her master, Rhiannon, was not under her supervision, killing her before she could do something about it. Then and there, Scarlett snaps, attacks the killers to death and, under a panic rush, she escapes. However, she takes a different route than in the Canon verse, never running into Kino as he has no special need for her help.
In this alternative version of the story, Kino genuinely had no further intentions aside from saving Ghouls. Inspired by his LE Vampire Ending, where him and Yui find peace and the Promised Land together and decide to help Ghouls at all costs. We could say Kino stays with Yui in this verse, while Scarlett is set free and they never cross paths.
Note: The nuances (Yui's role, the time where this happens, etc.) only serve as an 'excuse' of sorts. I don't expect anyone to keep up with it or adapt their lore to this, just have in mind that Scarlett is free lol.
Aftermath
Scarlett shelters in an abandoned cottage after escaping, found in the middle of the forest. She spends months, maybe years isolated from the world, paranoid, on edge, sleepless and terrified of being found and captured again. Over time, she gets out little by little, and realizes the world has changed, this human world wasn't like the one she lived in... oh, so long ago.
While taking a lot of time to grieve and settle down, she makes that cottage her new home, practices what she's learned in the past in case she needs to defend herself, and feeds off animals if she needs to. It takes long before she realizes she really is free, no one is going after her, and so she ponders... In this new human world, where her appearance doesn't give her nature away instantly, is it really a sin to start a new life?
For so long she was forced to accept that weak creatures like her were only meant to be overpowered, no matter what. However, her memories always reminded her that it wasn't always that way... She didn't get that treatment as a human, after all, despite her premature death. She wishes to go back to that state, to be able to be herself, and so she can't help but wonder: would others treat her like a worthless creature as well? What if not everyone thinks that way? Will her experiences be proven wrong by finding happiness in immortality?
Scarlett refused to keep waiting to be saved again. Therefore, one day she forced herself to stop thinking the world was out to eat her, and stepped out of that house with intentions to eat the world first. How bad could it possibly be?
Tidbits
• Here, Scarlett is more mentally and emotionally unstable than in the Canon verse. Since she only has herself to rely on, she can be hostile towards new people, detached and defensive, openly challenging and threatening out of fear and reluctance of giving in. She's also a little more impulsive, driven by a "How much can I do? How far can I go?" mentality, testing the limits first-hand in a world she learns more of every day, while at the same time yearning for the control that was taken from her and demanding the respect everyone refused to give her before.
• Scarlett started attending school out of curiosity after she spotted other demons attend. She was assigned to the 3rd year when she enrolled in Ryoutei academy, passing the entrance exam with unexpected ease. However, after discovering a Grand piano in the music room, she barely does more than the bare minimum to avoid getting expelled and keep having access to the piano. Someday, her consistency and routine of filling the school with calm music (even if it was during class) may or may not give her the chance to become a music teacher...
• She doesn't know the Sakamaki or the Mukami brothers personally. She has basic knowledge about Founders and other high-rank races thanks to her past, and she is aware of Kino's existence. Digging deeper, Sakamaki brothers (and other purebloods) may be part of some repressed memories of her participation in the Coming of Age Ceremony, as one of the Ghouls attacking the participants.
• When the rumors spread and she learns that she's free because of Kino's actions, she feels immensely grateful to him, but continues to keep her distance like she does with everyone else. Learning this is part of what gave her more confidence to act more and be less scared of unfair consequences, although that doesn't make her immune to them.
• She is not aware that Karl Heinz = Trismegiste. In other words, she doesn't know that Karl is technically who created her/brought her back to life. She knows he's dead, though, and associates Karl to other deeds.
• She earns money from gigs playing piano or cello in events or fancy reunions she applies or gets invited to (unless it's the Teacher!AU, where she that as a full-time job). She can be pretty frugal with her money, though sometimes most of it is spent in new necessary clothes or gifts for someone special.
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