my brother was very drunk last night and apparently got into a “fight” with an igglepiggle arcade ride and almost concussed himself 😭

stealing your question as promised: what authors do you think shaped your writing the most when you were first starting?

-mothmage

sdjkgas in middle school my favorite authors were Anne Rice and Francesca Lia Block and I think they have SENSUALITY in common even though their writing styles are SO opposite. As a teen when I was first writing I think I learned so much from both of them, like the seriousness and drama of AR but at the same time, FLB is so concise and punchy and sometimes her books are like these waterfalls of adjectives and I tried to think in that way too! Like I'm a very visual person so FLB books were like fucking crack for me, just heaps and heaps of descriptions of color and glittery and starry night skies and flowers growing where they shouldn't and it feels like poetry!

(I opened a random FLB book off my shelf and this is what I mean: We walked up and down the hills until our legs ached, then rode the trolley car to feel rushes of salty, misty air. We had picnics and fed the swans on the lake under the flowering terra-cotta arches, drank tea and ate pastries in rooms with cupids and rosebuds painted on the walls, strolled through the park, green-dazzled, fragrance-drunk, gasped at treasures gleaming gold in the half-lit glass cases of the museum. Then we'd return with spices, fruits and vegetables from Chinatown, seafood and baguettes from the wharf.

Her writing is so simple but it's just like heaps and heaps of sensory details !! And it's an interesting spectrum between her & AR to see how much you can say and like what type of efficiency you can find, because both of them give me that same feeling and feel so sensuous to me. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT EVERYTHING LOOKS LIKE AND SMELLS LIKE AND SOUNDS LIKE, TAKE ME THERE!

So as a teen I think I was learning a lot from them both and like I remember a fic I wrote with someone at a mall and it was like my FLB moment, I was like OMG I MUST MENTION THE TACO SMELL IN THE FOOD COURT AND THE PERFUME KIOSK AND THE HOUSE MUSIC BLASTING FROM A HAT SHOP AND THE CRUNCHY SUGAR ON A PRETZEL! And that's something that's stuck with me a lot, I think. I always want to tell you how things feel and smell like we're going on a journey, okay!

They both also have a way of treating cities/locations like characters--FLB actually does this quite literally by describing cities as if they're women (like LA is a blonde woman with big sunglasses and NYC has dyed black hair with severe red lipstick that stains on her cigarette butts, etc something like that) and it feels really specific and made me think a lot about locations and settings and how they affect the characters and story! They were also both the first books I ever read with queer people! FLB's short story Dragons in Manhattan was the first story I ever read with a trans person back when I was like 12 or 13.

AND THEN as a final nail in the coffin LOL I read I Know This Much is True by Wally Lamb when I was in 9th or 10th grade and it just really like !! IDK broke my head open for character voice. I don't think I'd read it so well done before, or maybe not noticed before. LIKE I MEAN this entire concept is like asking what did WE discover as kids or whatever, like so much of it is happenstance and if it hadn't been these authors it would've been someone else, and it's not like I stopped reading LOL like I still learn things from reading all the time! But Wally Lamb really brought this home for me. Like the way he writes Dominick's narration is just so like cynical and rugged and full of hurt and it made me think a lot about like how to profile a character with the language we use. I don't think FLB does this too much bc her writing is so breezy anyway and AR is so wordy that I don't think I could pick up on it as a teenager. I get more nuance now and see it better but it's there's a base level of like fanciness and purple prose that can be hard to see through on the first try, at least for me as a teen.

ANYWAY SORRY THAT WAS A REALLY LONG RESPONSE I JUST GOT REALLY EXCITED but Anne Rice + FLB + Wally Lamb wombo combo for emotionally torturous sensory overload cynical guttermouth style.

“The star-crossed lovers.”

1.

- - ┈┈∘┈˃̶༒˂̶┈∘┈┈ - -

A/N: I know it’s repetitive with the Cedric interactions ;-;

She had been sat uncomfortably in that chair for a long period of time.

"Chin up, Astrid." Her mothers voice rang in her ears that she actually winced as she adjusted her chin slightly. She was stuck in that pose for an hour longer just enough time for the artist to her a good base. They exited the portrait makers shop and into Diagon Alley.

"We are going to the Quidditch World Cup tonight, be prepared."

"The World Cup? Why?" She looked up at her mother.

"We were invited by the Minister, the Malfoys will also be there." She didn't even spare her daughter a look as they walked.

.・。.・゜✭・.

She could hear the roars of fans from outside the stadium, Oliver's hand was nimbly held in hers as they entered. Lucius and his son Draco were infront of her and her family. He had said something to..who was that? She looked up and it was Harry Potter. 'Oh.' She waved subtly at the boy. He waved back. The closer they grew to the ministers box she felt eyes on the back of her head. She turned and saw a familiar face.

He was smiling brightly "Astrid!" He grinned he had moved past his father to his friend.

"Cedric! What are you doing here?" She smiled.

"My father brought me and the Weasleys! You?"

"Ministers box, we were invited." She sighed. Oliver was staring at Cedric with his big eyes. He waved at the younger boy with that same smile.

"That sounds like fun,"

"It won't be, my father will just be talking about politics."

Cedric chuckled "well you could always join me if you wanted."

"I would if I had a choice." She bent down to Oliver's level "you would too wouldn't you buddy?" The boy nodded his head very fast. He didn't speak much. "Well I'll see you later, Cedric." She grinned standing up again.

"I'll see you as-well."

-

She was so painfully bored her mind numb from the buzzing of her fathers voice. When would he just shut up?

.・。.・゜✭・.

They made it back to their tent without a problem, the sounds of fireworks and screaming seemed usual as the Irish had one the tournament. She was busy preparing her brother for bed when screams of terror began coming into ear shot. Her mother stood up heading towards the opening of the tent and immediately beelined towards her kids.

"We have to leave,"

"Why what's going-" a loud explosion could be heard nearby.

"Now!" She scrambled to pick her little brother up, the small trio leaving their tent and belongings behind other than you know their wands. She covered Oliver's face as they ran, soon the crowds got thicker as terror ran through them. "Mum!" She yelled out her mothers voice becoming drowned out with everyone else's.

She was now stuck in the middle of a DISASTER without her parents. "Fuck."

"Fuck." Oliver repeated, she looked down at him with wide eyes.

"That's the first word you say? REALLY?"

"Fuck."

"Oh Merlin's beard."

-

They eventually got out safely and home. She could hear her parents arguing in the den.

.・。.・゜✭・.

Platform 9 3/4

She re-read the sign at least four times. She tilted her head as she blinked. "What and interesting sign." A male voice hummed. She jumped in response she turned to see the one and only Cedric Diggory.

"You scares me you, Bloke!" She hit his arm.

"Ow! Hey, not my fault you didn't hear my ten name calls."

"Asshole."

"Your favorite one."

-

The sound of the snack trolleys wheels filled her ears. She squinted as she looked up, "trolley cart... you got any Galleons?" She whispered to her friend. He rolled his eyes and nodded. "The usual?" He asked. She nodded.

"Only for you."

"Only for me!" She grinned.

.・。.・゜✭・.

They eventually arrived at the school making their way to one of the bridges. She looked up to the sky noticing the Pegasus drawn carriage. "Oh my! Cedric look!" She bumped his arm, he looked up. "What is that!?"

"Carriage dummy."

"I know that but what's- is that a SHIP?" She turned her head to the ocean. "It's a bloody ship Astrid! Oh Merlin's beard!" He was excited.

"We need to get our stuff to our common room and fast!" She giggled, he held some of her luggage the two running to Hufflepuff's entrance.

-

They now sat in the great hall, waiting for some news about what was going on. Rumors started circulating but Dumbledore shut it down instantly with his words. "We will be hosting the Tri-Wizard tournament!" Her face lit up.

After the whole ordeal of dinner and the announcements she and Cedric stood in the main hall.

"You gonna join?" She asked in a low whisper.

"Most likely, you?"

"Yeah let's see how that'll turn out. I'm a tad scared." She frowned.

"Hey! Don't be let's hope I get chosen and bring Hufflepuff internal glory." He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

.・。.・゜✭・.

The sound of rain hitting the sides of her window awoke her from her sleep, she turned her body sideways a pillow covering one side of her head in hopes to drown the noise out. But.. it was futile.

A few sharp knocks hit against her door frame, "Come on Astrid wake the bloody hell up! We're gonna be late for breakfast!"

"Huh..? Cedric- crap! Oh Merlin's beard!" She stumbled out of her bed whizzing to open the door. "I'm so so-"

"Save it, you owe me extra toast and a butter beer."

"You bloke."

"A lovely one."

"Ugh."

.・。.・゜✭・.

The two made it to the great hall in one piece, the smell of freshly cooked food filling their airways.

"Do I smell.. oh.. it's delightful traditional English.. perfect." Cedric was smiling with such glee, his eyes closed his lips slightly apart. His eyes opened once more as he raced her to their seats.

"Ew so many beans." She grimaced.

"The beans are the best part." He frowned.

"To you."

"Always." He winked as he began to dig into the meal, she rolled her eyes as she placed some eggs, toast and bacon onto her plate. Taking a piece of bacon in between her lips she heard a familiar voice.

Her eyes lingered on a certain red-head, he was smiling and joking with his twin. She wasn't going to lie she did fancy George a bit but not too much. It was like he could feel her stare and turned a bit winking at her as he kept his conversation with his brother. Her face reddened.

She turned away as Cedric turned to her.

"Now what was that?" A small teasing tone in his voice.

"Don't, I swear I'll turn you into a toad."

"Who says I wouldn't like to be a toad?"

"Me, because I'll use you for my next potions class Cedric."

"Ouch quite mean don't you think?"

"Not mean enough."

.・。.・゜✭・.

"Oi, Evergreen!" She turned her head towards the voice, there stood Draco Malfoy.

"What do you want Malfoy."

"I was just wondering how you were considering what happened after the cup." He had his hands on his robe as he was towering over her. She rolled her eyes.

"I'm fine, what is it that you actually need?" She glared at him.

"...." He had murmured something under his breath.

"Speak up!" She hit his arm.

"Oi! That hurt. I need..the babbling beverage ingredients." She stared at him blankly.

"For..what?"

"A prank..just a small one."

"No."

"What do you mean no!?"

"No! If you want me to steal from Snape it's a no."

"Please! I'll pay you."

"Get the Weasleys to do it, and pay them well." She moved past him. What an odd way to start her morning.

-

Herbology, her safe space her love. It was her love until she could feel Neville's breath on her neck. "Neville."

"Astrid." You may be wondering what in the world is going on here? It's plain and simple. Rivalry, he had moved up into advanced classes and she was his competitor for another spot in a class.

"Move the bloody back."

"What do I have to do to get you to get out of the running for that spot?" He whined a bit. She stared at him.

"You are so much cuter when you aren't whining Neville."

"I know your mom-" she smacked his shoulder.

"Don't bring the muggle jokes in, not right now." She had a smile on her face, it wasn't one of those we hate each other rivalry just mostly a frenemy one.

𝐔𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐄𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟕.𝟕𝐤 𝐍𝐁: 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥, 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐚

Tuesday, 13 December 2017

Tooley Street was always busy, whether there were a horde of people walking to and from the riverside and underground, or cars driving by at a ridiculous speed. London Bridge station on the other side of the road to where Y/N and the gang sat at Caffé Nero, looked like a small insect in comparison to The Shard that reached like a pillar above the partly cloudy winter sky. The blue painted brick building beside it, The Shipwright Arms pub, was a lively addition to an otherwise very bleak street.

The winter wind by the riverside was horrendous, but Y/N had offered to come with Annalise on her cigarette break, so she had only herself to blame for exposing herself to more of the biting cold than completely necessary. From where the two were sitting, they could just make out Tower Bridge behind them, bare trees rising up along the streets that indicated summer was long gone and winter had arrived.

Y/N had spent a lot of time just sitting outside the last few days. Whether it was on a bench by Regent’s Canal, in the grass at Shoreditch Park, or at a table outside a café with a coffee in hand. She had just been sitting there, staring out at nothing. Thinking. All she had been doing since finding that watch was think.

She had tried to find some kind of logical explanation as to why that watch had the coordinates for her family’s Newport cabin, but there was none. What kind of connection did George have to Newport? To that cabin? Had he just fucked her and left it there because he knew who Y/N’s sister was? And where was George now? She had not seen him since that night in October, was he still around? Or had Y/N just missed him when he had been, and this had all just been a huge coincidence. But Y/N somehow knew, deep down, that this was far from a coincidence and she should not treat it as one.

“You have to come to Monnickendam,” Annalise said, blowing out a puff of white smoke.

Y/N looked away from a man across the street who was arguing passionately with someone on his phone. Shoving the thoughts of the watch that was laid on her desk in her room, out of her head. She had not told anyone about it, this was not something she wanted everyone to know about because she had no idea what it meant. The only person that knew was Harry, and she would like to keep it that way.

“I’ve never been to the Netherlands,” Y/N said.

“Even more of a reason to come.”

Y/N smiled. “Buzzing. I haven’t travelled much in Europe, mostly been to Brazil with my family.”

“When you come to Monnickendam, we have to take the train to, like, Germany or France. Andorra is also so beautiful, I think you’re gonna love it.”

“Make a roadtrip out of it.”

“Exactly.”

Y/N’s smile grew. “Had you been to London before you came here for school?”

Annalise brought the cigarette up to her mouth. “Loads of times.”

“Really?”

“Yes, we went here around Easter in 2012 the first time, and I fell in love. Went here four more times, then to an Open Day last year.”

Y/N nodded. “Was Helmond your first choice then? Did you like it the best?”

“No, Battersea was, but I’m happy I ended up at Helmond.” Annalise breathed out white vapour. “Helmond’s prettier.”

Y/N laughed. “The aesthetic is more important than the uni itself, innit? If you can’t take decent Instagram pictures there, what’s the point of spending the next three years at that place?”

Annalise laughed along with Y/N, taking a last drag. “I rarely use Instagram.”

“I used to. I loved to like document my life, to let all my friends and family know what I was doing at all times. But then I found Snapchat, and it’s just better.”

“You know that if you, like, save a picture or video in the Snapchat app, Snapchat owns it?”

Y/N blinked.

“At least what someone at home told me once.”

“Doesn’t Instagram do the same?” Y/N asked.

“Think so,” Annalise said, walking over to the litter and stumping her cigarette out in the ash tray on top of it. “Ground rule: don’t save anything onto social media. Anyone can save and see your pictures.”

“Basically,” Y/N mumbled, looking over at the man she had watched earlier. He was still arguing with someone over the phone.

“Ready to head back inside?” Annalise asked.

“Yeah.” Y/N got up and the two strolled back over to the Caffé Nero their three other mates were sat in. Thian, Hayden, and Chloe were all sat with their laptops in front of them and books in the centre of the table behind their screens. Chloe was talking animatedly as Y/N and Annalise approached, Hayden busy with something on the laptop in front of them while Thian sat with a book in his hands, looking at Chloe as she spoke. Y/N took off her puffer jacket, hanging it off the back of her chair as she sat down, adjusting her black V-neck jumper and loose denim jeans.

“…the problem isn’t that. The problem is the fact that they never clean up after themselves. That’s the problem,” Chloe said, groaning loudly. “And when I ask in the flat groupchat if anyone wanna be social, no one answers. I swear, all of them hate me.”

“Maybe they’re just busy,” Thian suggested.

“They always say that, but I know two of the boys are in Dave’s room playing something on that PlayStation.” Chloe crossed her arms over her chest. “Should I learn how to play FIFA?”

“You don’t have to impress them,” Y/N said, turning her laptop back on to finish the essay for Critical Reading that was due that Friday.

“No, I know. But if I want to hang out with anyone in my flat, I gotta do something. What games do you play in the PlayStation, Thian?”

Thian stared at Chloe for a second, mouth working before he mumbled, “I didn’t bring one to uni.”

“Alright, then what did you play at home?”

“Call of Duty.”

Chloe scrunched up her nose. “Isn’t that a war game?”

“Yeah.”

“Nah, I’m not into that.” Chloe grimaced, looking at something further away. “I’ve never really played PlayStation. One of the blokes I dated in college gamed a lot, but I couldn’t be asked to sit around and just watch.”

“The three in my flat play GTA,” Y/N said. “At least that’s what Nathan wants to play, Harry and Mason just go along.”

Chloe’s face instantly lit up. “Oh, my word, Y/N. You have to make Harry teach me how to play something on the PlayStation.”

There was a slight pang in Y/N’s chest at the sound of his name leaving Chloe’s lips in that way. Y/N opened, then closed her mouth, then opened it again. “I don’t really hang out with them when they play it. I’ve had so much to do these past months.”

“That’s fine, Nathan can keep us company,” Chloe said, leaning back in her seat. “Make Mason come, too. God-“ She grinned, letting her head fall between her shoulder blades. “-Your flatmates are fit.”

“Harry’s fitter than Mason,” Hayden chimed in.

“No, definitely Mason,” Annalise said.

“I can’t choose. Depends on my mood,” Chloe mused.

Thian kept quiet, staring pointedly at his laptop.

“Can you do it? Make them teach me?” Chloe begged, sticking her bottom lip out at Y/N.

Y/N took a deep breath. “I’ll try.”

Chloe grinned.

“They might be busy, too. Might not get to it till after Christmas break.”

Chloe waved her hand. “That’s fine. I just want to hang out with someone from my flat eventually.”

Y/N glanced down at her laptop again, trying to forget the conversation she had just had with the other three. Chloe continued chattering on about something of no significance, Y/N did not care to listen as she wanted to finish her essay before she had to leave for home coming Saturday. Though her coffee was cold now as she took a sip of it, Y/N still appreciated the taste of caffeine. It woke her up, made her more alert and focused.

Ever since she was seven years old, her papai had made her coffee to drink. He always said “coffee is as vital to a Brazilian’s existence as tea is to a Brit’s” and she had drunk it ever since. She loved the taste of it much more than tea, but seeing as tea was much easier to make, she had come to resort to it here in London. Home in Nottingham, there was always a brew in the making or one ready for whoever felt like having a cup, made with a proper coffee machine that Davi had invested proper money in. He had bought it back in 2001, and it worked just as well as it did back then. Y/N, like her papai, loved the coffee from that old coffee maker more than anything else. She could not wait until she was home with her parents so she could drink proper coffee all the time without going to the nearest coffee shop to do so. The instant coffee Nathan often made smelled and tasted rank, Y/N would have no other coffee than her papai’s and a cup made at a coffee shop.

“I’m gonna go buy a muff,” Hayden said, getting up from their chair. “This essay is doing my head in, I need something to sooth the pain.”

“Oh, could you buy me a scone?” Thian asked, putting his hands together as if he was begging on his knees. “I’ll pay with five stellar knock knock jokes.”

“Make it six.”

“Deal.”

The two shook hands and Hayden grinned as they looked at the other three. “Anything from the trolley, dears?”

Y/N and Annalise chuckled. “No thanks,” Y/N said, Annalise saying the same thing.

“No, I’ll just add to this,” Chloe said, patting at her stomach.

“Add to what?” Hayden asked.

“A belly.” Chloe gripped the little that was protruding from her tight denim jeans. “I’m trying to start working out for bikini season, to remove that extra uni weight, you know?”

Hayden looked absolutely lost, so did Thian, and Annalise looked to not be paying any attention at all. Y/N, however, felt a familiar pang in her chest. It was a small explosion she had felt before, one that would taint the rest of her day. Instinctively, she put her scarf around her chest, letting it fall over her stomach.

Hayden did not comment, instead they just walked up to the till, ready to tell the lady working there their order. The table fell silent, but not for the reason Y/N wanted it to. No, they were all just busy with their essays. Y/N knew that it would be impossible for her to concentrate on the assignment now that the only thing she would be thinking about for the rest of the day was Chloe’s comment. Chancing a look over at her friend, she saw her flicking through a book in her lap, completely unbothered, Annalise was cocking her head to the side as she wrote something on her Mac, while Thian was watching Hayden pay for their food. None of them had batted an eyelash. Which was nothing new, Y/N was used to no one picking up on covered up fatphobic comments.

She knew that Chloe had not said those things with her in mind, that the statement had been about her own body only. But Y/N could not help but feel the comment in her very soul. She could remember her mates from school in Nottingham making comments similar to that one, so hearing it wasn’t alien, but it stung as much as hearing it that first time.

“Here we go,” Hayden said, putting the scone down on Thian’s keyboard.

“Scones are so bloody good,” Thian moaned, taking a huge bite out of his. “If we had to fuck a food, I’d fuck scones.”

The table went quiet, all looking at Thian. He just continued on eating, humming some Alesso and Conor Maynard song that was always playing on the radio.

“Why did you just say that?” Hayden asked.

“Felt like sharing my thoughts with the class.”

Hayden raised their eyebrows before looking at the laptop in front of them. “The class did not need to know.”

Thian shrugged his shoulders and Annalise laughed, Chloe joining in after a little while. Y/N smiled at them, but her thoughts still drifted back to Chloe’s comments just a minute earlier. She spread her scarf out over her stomach, wishing she had worn something that wasn’t so tight fitted.

Friday, 15 December 2017

“Sorry we’re late,” Mason said as him and the rest of the rugby team streamed into the seminar room. Hayden, Y/N, Thian, Chloe, Annalise, Nathan, and Annalise’s two friends were all sat around one table, already having started a round of Uno.

“Oh, don’t worry,” Hayden smiled. “I’ve put Uno decks on the other tables.”

“Cheers.”

Mason and the rest of the team sat down, all chatting amongst themselves and letting go of heavy sighs as they took their seats. It was clear that the last training session for the team this year had not only been cold, but also immensely tiring. They all looked very ready to travel home for Christmas break, and it looked like a few already had.

Y/N felt their struggle with the cold. She herself was wearing a mini linen skater dress in black. The skirt was loose, making it comfortable to hide her belly in – she had not stopped thinking about Chloe’s comment all week, but it would not stop her from looking really fucking good – and the waist was open, baring some of her skin and rib tattoo to everyone. Her skin protruded around the straps that were wrapped around her waist, connecting her skirt from her top, but there was nothing she could do about it, so she just tried to stay out of Chloe’s vision. The plunge neck revealed a very deep cleavage and skin, making it so Y/N had put on two silver necklaces to top of the outfit. The rest of the top had long sleeves and a nice collar, which was why Y/N had bought the dress. It was slutty, but in a modest way.

The rest of the gang around the table had also dressed up, ready to go out after this. They all had their last lecture of the semester today, meaning that their Christmas break had just started, and they wanted to celebrate before everyone travelled to their separate locations the next day. Chloe to Oxford, Thian to Bristol, Hayden to Sheffield, Annalise to Monnickendam, and Y/N back home to Nottingham. It would be weird not to meet up with them, to not go to lectures and stress about assignments for the next month. Then again, Annalise had made a Snapchat and Messenger group to ensure that the gang would talk every single day. And knowing her mates, Y/N was sure they would.

During a break between rounds, Y/N got up from their table after making sure that her polyamide shorts underneath her dress didn’t roll down her stomach. She wore them to prevent chafing, knowing that if she did not wear them underneath her skirt, it would be hard for her to wear anything the next day. She did the zip of her chunky sock boots before making her way over to Mason’s table.

“Alright, Y/N?” Mason said as she came closer, giving her a small smile.

“How’re you lot finding the society?” she asked, looking around the table, meeting Kai’s eyes.

Kai beamed. “Good, it’s nice to spend some time with the whole team off the rugby pitch.”

“You’re dressed up,” Mason pointed out. “What’s the occasion?”

“Uno Society.”

Mason smiled. “Trying to pull some rugby players, are ya?”

“No. No, rugby players.”

Mason only raised his eyebrows as if he didn’t believe her, smile widening.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “You’re just as unbearable as Harry sometimes.”

“Nah, Harry’s worse than me.”

“Right.” Y/N took a big breath. “Chloe over there, the blonde,” Y/N said, motioning behind her with a nod of her head. Mason’s gaze immediately fell on Chloe. “She’s wondering if you and Harry can teach her how to play the PlayStation.”

Mason blinked, looking over at Kai as the bigger man clapped his hands together before laughing.

“Is that funny?” Y/N asked.

“No, it’s not. I just knew Kai would react like that,” Mason said. “But I’ll do it. After Christmas at some point.”

“Nice, I’ll tell her that, then.”

“Why does she need someone to teach her how to play PlayStation?” Kai asked, and though there was laughter in his voice, Y/N could tell his question was sincere.

“Some blokes in her flat never want to be social, they just stay in this one room playing PlayStation, and she’s kinda left out ‘cause she doesn’t really know how to play.”

“That might not work out,” Kai said, smiling still.

“Worth a shot, either way.”

“Maybe she just wanna spend time with this hunk,” Kai grinned, putting a hand on Mason’s shoulder. “Or the other hunk that’s not here.”

“Speaking of him,” Y/N said, putting a hand on her hip. “Not that I care, but where is he?”

Kai grinned, sitting back in his chair. “You don’t care? Not at all?”

“No, Y/N doesn’t like Harry much,” Mason explained, completely unbothered. “He’s working. The team’s popping by The Stag’s Head later to check on him since it’s his last shift and all that.”

Y/N nodded, suddenly remembering how Harry had told her that a few weeks ago.

“What’s the bellend done to you?” Kai asked.

“Another time, Kai. We’re in the middle of a round,” Mason said. “I’ll find a day that’s good for Chloe to come over.”

“Wicked,” Y/N smiled. “See ya.”

“Later, mate.”

Y/N walked back to her table, sitting down in her seat again. “Sorry,” she said when Hayden gave her a look. “Chloe, Mason said he could teach you how to play PlayStation sometime after Christmas break.”

Chloe squealed. “Really?!”

“Yeah, he’ll text me saying when.”

“Ahh! Buzzing!”

Y/N gave her a smile before the gang went back to playing.

Though she was physically present over the next hour or so, Y/N’s mind travelled back to the flat and the watch on her desk. Besides assignments, Christmas, and what Chloe said on Tuesday, that was all Y/N had spent her time thinking about. She would be in bed, about to go to sleep, then just get out of her bed and look at the watch, study it carefully. Maybe there was another message of sorts on it, maybe she was supposed to do something with it. But other days she did not want to touch that watch. There was something about it, something about how it had just been left in her possession so casually, something about the fact that she had not seen George since that night, that did not sit right with Y/N at all.

Throughout the rest of the night, after the Uno Society, while the gang was sat at a pub, and then dancing at a club later, Y/N could not bring herself to enjoy herself thoroughly. All her energy went back to that watch. She wanted to understand what it meant, why George had it, and what she was supposed to do with the information. Was she even supposed to do anything at all? It only made her want to travel down to Newport even more. She had to now. Her parents might think about getting rid of that cabin, but Y/N had to revisit it one last time before that happened.

Y/N did not drink that night; she was afraid of the conspiracy theories she would form if she did. She had one cocktail at the pub they went to, but could not do more than that, and her mates did not ask questions as to why she was not drinking, something she really appreciated. It was late when she announced she would be going home, and so she called Nathan and made him stay on the line with her as she took the tube back to Haggerston Station. Once she reached Orsman Road, she could hear his snores on the other end, and hung up halfway down the road to the flat. However, in the distance, she saw a stag’s head sign hanging out on a metal pole, protruding from the building opposite her flat building. She suddenly remembered what Mason said, and crossed the road, making her way over to the pub.

A small group of lads made their way out of the pub as Y/N reached it, the last one holding the door for her. She smiled and thanked him before walking inside. Now that she wasn’t affected by alcohol, Y/N was finally able to take in the pub properly without having the slight haze of alcohol taint it. The lights were comfortably dimmed, not too much so you could not read the menu, but just enough so that a person’s facial features would be a tad blurry. The red that ran along the wall behind the dark bar counter was subtle, giving the bar a sense of holding onto the secrets of each person who walked through the front doors, like a Victorian murder mystery. Y/N could see Sweeney Todd’s barber shop trapped in the same colours.

“Excuse me, miss,” a man walking out from behind the counter said, grey hair and broad shoulders. “We’re closed.”

“Oh,” she said, looking around the dark pub. “I… I thought I might find Harry here.”

The man narrowed his eyes a little. “He’s got a new girlfriend? So soon after the other ones?”

Y/N felt herself narrow her eyes back at the man. Girlfriend? Harry’s had girlfriends – plural – since he started working in The Stag’s Head? There was a very strange combination of a lot of different feelings that swarmed around Y/N’s body, suddenly making her feel seasick. She was about to abort her mission, to say she would just catch Harry at home, when there came a voice from the door leading out into the smoking area.

“Y/N,” Harry said, turning the lights off outside and closing the door. It looked as if he could not quite believe his eyes as he saw her standing there, like he had not thought she would ever show up to his work like this. Without seemingly able to help himself, his green eyes fell down to her green dress and her exposed legs. He quickly looked to his other co-worker, clearing his throat as he walked behind the pub counter. Y/N could swear she saw a slight pink hue to his cheekbones.

“I’ll leave if you’re busy.”

“No,” Harry said, the word coming out a little too quickly as if desperation got the better of him. “No. Not busy.”

The grey-haired man raised his eyebrows at Harry. He must have seen something in Harry’s demeanour, because he said, “You’ll be alright to close up on your own?”

Harry smiled. “It’ll be a nice way to end my time at Stag’s Head.”

“Nice,” the man Y/N now suspected was Harry’s boss, said. “Pop by with the keys tomorrow, will ya?”

“Yes, sir.”

The man gave both Harry and Y/N a smile each before he started on his walk up to his office. The pub was suddenly very quiet, not a single sound came from inside, just the distant siren outside and the low buzz of the city. A place that was usually bustling with noise, energy, and anticipation, was now left with the latter. Y/N looked around the place, unsure of what to do with herself now that it was only her and Harry there. Harry watched her, picking up the Cif spray from where it stood under the counter. She felt his gaze on her as she walked along the booths, touching the red velvet cushions, a rush of goosebumps travelling up her spine at the knowledge that she had his full attention.

She turned around, leaning her bum against a table as she took in the liquor behind Harry. He was washing the counter, looking over at Y/N again, eyes falling to her mid-area that was expanded slightly at the pressure the surface behind her was providing. He quickly looked away again, biting his lips together as he focused on the counter in front of him. Y/N could not help a small smile.

“What made you show up to my work, then?” he asked.

“Can’t a friend show up to another friend’s work?”

Harry let out a strangled chuckle. “Alright. That’s very nice of you, but I don’t buy that for a single second.”

Y/N raised her eyebrows. “You don’t?”

“There’s gotta have been another reason as to why.”

“Okay…? What’s that?”

Harry shrugged his shoulder, spraying more Cif onto the counter. “You were bored. You didn’t want to be around your other mates any longer. You wanted to see a delicious man with an irresistible Northern accent clean up a pub since it’s his last shift ever here tonight.”

Y/N let out a laugh, placing her hands on either side of the table beside her. “None of the above.”

“Alright,” Harry said, coming out from behind the pub. “What didn’t I cover?”

“You weren’t at the Uno Society meeting.”

The answer came so effortlessly, as if her subconscious had been holding onto the answer for Y/N until she was strong enough to know the real reason. Her hands instantly gripped the table harder, feeling embarrassed for admitting vulnerability so easily. She blamed how easy it was to talk to him, how he just seemed to throw a lasso around her deepest secrets, her most private desires, and drag them out of her.

Harry looked over at her from where he was cleaning the tables a bit further away in the pub. “Had work. Would’ve been there if I didn’t have to be here.”

She nodded, looking down at her black boots. For some reason, his words warmed something inside her. Hearing someone care about something she cared about made her feel special. Then again, someone she just met on the street could tell her they hated Marmite, something Y/N also did, and she would feel equally as fuzzy inside. Finding small bonds, small preferences, small somethings that connected you to other people, made you feel like you weren’t alone, but it also made you feel special, made you feel seen and understood. It was as if someone opened a door into their soul, and giving you a warm handshake, welcoming you into them and their life.

“The lads had a blast,” Harry said, now closer to Y/N as she had zoned out for a minute and some.

“They did?”

“Yeah, it’s nice to just sit down and relax like that. We don’t really get to do that.”

Y/N watched as Harry hovered by a table, leaning over it to clean it. His black tee shirt stretched over his broad back, his shoulder blades visibly working as he ran the cloth over the table in front of him. The outline of his muscles, the way they were so hard against the soft fabric of the tee shirt, made Y/N’s body feel very hot all of a sudden. He worked so carefully, sliding his hand holding the cloth so slowly over the table, paying it his undivided attention. She adjusted her position against her table, looking away from Harry as he stood back up, his black trousers that had been tight around his buttocks, slacking at the lack of pressure on the material. Get a fucking grip, Y/N screamed at herself in her head, focusing on the wall in front of her. She saw Harry look at her over his shoulder, gaze lingering on her for a few seconds. Y/N suddenly found it very hard to draw a proper breath.

“You’re mad I didn’t show up?” Harry asked.

Y/N was silent, her brain completely blank. “Didn’t show up…?”

She could see his smug smile in her peripheral vision. “Yeah.”

“To what?”

His smile widened and he focused on a table closer to her. “The Uno Society.”

She closed her eyes. Her checking out Harry while he had his back to her had not just made her forget the whole reason why she had showed up to The Stag’s Head in the first place. His body looking the way it did, him caring about the society, him teasing her to get a reaction out of her… Why the fuck did he have that effect on her?

“No,” Y/N said, refusing to look at him still. “I’m not mad.”

“Then why won’t you look at me right now?”

Y/N could feel her hands instinctively grabbing harder onto the table behind her. “No reason.”

“You know,” Harry started, she could hear the smirk in his voice. “You can try all you want, but I still know you.”

She huffed. “You wish.”

“I don’t gotta,” he said, chuckling a little. “Don’t gotta wish when I already do know you. Wish I knew you better, wish you’d just open up to me like you did so easily before, but that’s for a later time.”

That made her look over at Harry, her eyebrows drawn together as she just watched him clean yet another table. He… Did he really think she would one day open up to him again and they would go back to being friends like they used to? Was he really that optimistic? Had he thought about it? About them and their friendship? And what a future with her alongside him at uni would look like? Her eyes landed on his bicep as it flexed, holding his body weight as he leaned against the table again. Her gaze following his arm all the way down to his hand, long slender fingers wrapped around the edge of the table, and the thick veins over the dorsal part of his hand made something in Y/N’s brain short circuit. That along with the casual way he was leaning his hips against the table, staring down at it with his head cocked.

What the fuck, Y/N said to herself again, looking away from him. What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck?! How was she supposed to stay neutral, to not find him attractive, to not want to sink right back into old habits when she allowed herself to study him and look at him like that. She had to stop. This was getting out of hand.

“You’re uncharacteristically quiet tonight,” Harry said, working slowly as he cleaned up the table in the booth beside the one she was stood leaning against.

“No, I’ve just got things on my mind.”

“What things?”

Your broad shoulders. Your hands. The way you stick your tongue out of your mouth when you are concentrating. But Y/N said none of those things, as doing so would sentence her to a lifetime of humiliation.

“Insignificant things.”

“When they’re taking up a lot of space in your head and preventing you from being present, they’re not insignificant,” Harry said, sounding a little serious all of a sudden. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, there’s nothing inherently bad on my mind, just… I’ve got a lot of… thoughts,” Y/N said, not knowing how else to explain it without giving something away.

“What thoughts?”

Y/N narrowed her eyes at him. “Thought you did Architectural Studies, didn’t know you also had a degree in being Nosy.”

Harry let out a laugh, coming to stand in front of her with the spray and the cloth in his hands. “I’m very nosy.”

“Glad to hear you’re self-aware.”

“But right now I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

Bloody hell, Y/N thought, could he just fucking stop being so nice? So fucking adorable? And fit? It made hating him so much harder than it already was.

“I’m okay.”

He took a step closer. “What’s been on your mind then?”

“Just… life.”

“Has uni exhausted you?”

“Yeah, but it’s not what I’m thinking about.”

Harry took another step closer. Y/N’s palms were suddenly very clammy.

“What’s on your mind?” he asked again, a small smile on his lips as if he was challenging her.

“Maybe you just have to face the fact that I won’t tell you and you can’t figure it out on your own.”

“Nah,” Harry said. “I’ll figure you out.”

Y/N watched as Harry took another step closer, her heart suddenly beating very fast inside her chest.

“I just gotta…” He trailed off, now standing directly in front of her. Tip of his shoes against the tip of hers. Without a warning of sorts, he leaned closer, bending over her until his head hovered beside her own. Chest wavering above hers, touching as she drew in a precipitous breath and he did the same. Their bodies did not brush against one another again, an invisible, burning shield was built to keep them apart the second their upper bodies made contact. As if the universe was telling them that by touching like that, the world would go up in total flames around them.

Harry’s sudden closeness made her breathe in a little too harshly, she was sure he must have heard it but she simply did not care. The reaction her body was having to him being so close was electric, it made all the hairs on her body stand on end. She didn’t know what he was doing that close to her, thinking at first that he must have wanted to whisper something in her ear, to say something to her that would undoubtedly make her glad she was leaning against something solid for support.

But she heard the familiar sound of the Cif spray, and a second later, Harry reached his cloth behind Y/N’s back, cleaning the table. She felt his breath against her neck, triggering something radioactive inside her. The oud aroma of his cologne, with notes of cedar, patchouli, and spicy saffron filled Y/N’s nostrils. In those seconds when Harry hovered above her like that, his warm body inches from hers, breath fanning against her skin, his aroma, and aura mere inches from hers, Y/N was conflicted as to if she wanted time to speed up or slow down some more. She knew that if she stayed like that, with Harry so close to her, for much longer she would go absolutely mad and have an impossible time resisting him if he were to try something like he had done in the living room the week before.

No sooner had she thought that, he pushed off, face lingering just centimetres from hers. “I just need to take a look,” he said, speaking as if he did not mind if the whole world was watching them. He raised his hand, about to touch her chin. For what reason, Y/N did not know, but she didn’t ask any questions. However, he stopped, as if touching her was something he could not do. Y/N was glad he hadn’t, because God knows how her body would have reacted had he tenderly touched her jawline like it looked like he wanted to.

“Take a look?” Y/N mumbled.

“At you.”

A small breath left her lips.

“Maybe the answer to what’s been on your mind is somewhere in your eyes,” he said, eyes suddenly falling to her lips. “Or your lips.” He glanced at her forehead. “Or in the slight lines that appear between your eyebrows when you’re deep in thought.” He looked down at her hands on the table edge. “Or the way you’re gripping the table so tight right now.”

Jesus Christ, she was about to explode. Y/N let go of it immediately, standing up and forcing Harry to take two steps back. His intense glance lingered on her, falling to her lips as she opened her mouth to take a breath.

“It’s getting late,” she said, fingering the hem of her leather jacket as her heart continued to hammer away inside her chest.

“Wait for me, yeah?” Harry walked over to the next table to clean it, doing it way faster than all the other ones. Biting his lip and moving his hand with the cloth over the table as if to make up for time spent on something else, cleaning very slowly and standing too close to her.

“No, I can walk home by myself.”

“I know you’re capable of walking, but I don’t like you being out in the streets all alone late at night.”

Y/N looked over at Harry as he cleaned the last booth, seeing the determination to finish as quickly as possible.

“It’s just across the road,” she said.

“Please just let me walk you across the road, then.” Harry walked behind the bar counter, putting the cleaning supplies away.

“You make me sound like an old lady.”

“Just-“ He appeared from behind the counter. “-Wait.” He then disappeared into the backroom where he only stayed for a few seconds. Y/N would have thought that since he enjoyed working at The Stag’s Head, he would have at least lingered for a few moments to take in the last time he would ever be back there. But instead, he emerged wearing his coat, locking the door behind him, mere seconds later. He turned the lights off, and, walking over to where Y/N was standing, placed a gentle hand to her lower back, guiding her in the direction of the door that she could only barely make out in the dark. Goosebumps instantly ran up Y/N’s back and she inhaled at the pressure of Harry’s hand on her body. He held the door open for her and Y/N stepped outside, watching as Harry locked the front doors to The Stag’s Head for the very last time.

He looked around them after locking the door, checking up and down the three streets that came to a crossroad just outside the pub. Once his eyes finally met Y/N’s again he gave her the smallest smile, then motioned for her to lead the way back to their flat. She wanted to roll her eyes, but she could not find it in herself to do just that in that moment. Though it was just across the road, she very much appreciated Harry’s company back to their flat. Distance was nothing when the roads were dark and the faces of the figures walking past were left blurred by the dim streetlamps.

Harry held the door for Y/N once again, letting her be the first to enter the building. She strolled upstairs, unlocking their front door and watching as Harry gestured for her to walk on inside. The flat was dark, except for the warm yellow lights Nathan had twined around the railing of their terrace and the changing colours of the luminous Christmas tree in the living room. The kitchen was usually left in darkness, as was the rest of the flat, but since their eyes were used to night outside, it wasn’t hard to navigate their way to the stairs. They took their jackets off, and without her leather jacket on, Y/N was very aware of how much of her skin was exposed to Harry. Her dress showed off her legs, arms, and parts of her back to him, and she knew that, if he walked behind her up the stairs, he would get a good look at her bum.

She took her boots off and started up the stairs with her purse in her hand, hearing Harry make his way up them as well. If any man were to walk behind her up the stairs, Harry was one she trusted not to take the mick, to not look up her skirt and make her feel uncomfortable. But… after everything… she still didn’t want him to see her knickers. However, facing her door, she heard Harry walking up the stairs. Taking a deep breath, she turned around to face him once he reached the first floor. What happened next happened so suddenly that Y/N barely managed to wrap her head around it before the moment was gone.

She had just turned around to face Harry when he walked up over to her. Taking a step back at the sudden closeness, she felt herself breathe in sharply as Harry’s face lingered only centimetres from her own again. Though the person standing in front of her was a man, a completely different person, something inside her brain took her back to that night when they were 16. He hadn’t been this close to her since then, had not touched her or looked at her like this since then. His eyes flicked down to her lips, and then to meet hers, wet lips parting as if the anticipation was killing him.

And Y/N had to painfully admit, it was killing her, too. As much as she had tried to fight it, it was impossible to now. She wanted Harry to kiss her. Not tenderly kiss her like you would peck a person you were in love with, or to gently rub his thumb over her cheek as a show of affection, or to hug her tight when they met up for lunch. No, she wanted him to fucking kiss her. She wanted him to grab her face and kiss her hard; desperately, needily. She wanted them to fumble to take each other’s clothes off, and for him to make up for how bad that first time together was. There was absolutely no denying it, Y/N wanted Harry. She really wanted him. All these months, all those moments spent trying to push the thought away, she simply could not anymore. There was a hunger inside her for him, but only in the sexual sense. She could never fall in love with this man, she just wanted to fuck him. And she wanted to fuck him bad.

Her own lips parted, and she looked into his eyes with an expression she hoped he could read, because she needed him to understand. Once again, Harry raised his hand, hovering between them as if he were unsure what to do with it. Fingers twitching, she could see he was conflicted, whether he should touch her cheek as it looked like he wanted to, or if he should stop himself. Y/N let her eyes fall to his hand, to tell him she wanted him to touch her. She wanted to feel him somewhere, anywhere on her. Just looking at him, she could see he wanted the same as her. He wanted to feel her body, to explore it in a completely different way to last time.

Harry’s hand fell out of view, and just as Y/N thought he was going to let it hang limply, uselessly, at his side, she felt something on her waist. A warm pressure, snaking around the black linen of her dress. She waited for him to pull her closer to him, for their torsos to connect, but it never happened.

“Y/N,” Harry whispered, eyes falling to her lips again.

She did not answer, instead just tilted her head so it would be easier for him to kiss her. With her eyelids hanging low over her eyes, her body language not showing any sign of protesting, and with her lips parted, Y/N hoped the message was coming across clearly. Harry leaned in closer, his nose almost touching hers. Her heart was beating so fast and hard it hurt. Her hands were clammy. All her attention focused on Harry and the electricity they created on that spot where his hand rested. He leaned down, lips hovering just over the crook of her neck, making her close her eyes. Breath against the hair of her shoulder, lightning shooting up Y/N’s back. He slowly leaned back out again, nose hovering beside hers. The anticipation was absolutely killing her.

“I…” But he drifted off, eyes falling to her lips again. She could feel his breath on her mouth, could smell his cologne. The tension was making her dizzy, she just wanted him to bloody kiss her already.

She was just about to do it herself when she felt his warm hand drop off her waist. She blinked, and the next second, Harry took a step back. He only looked at her, mouth working as if he was trying to find the right words to say, but there were none. So, as if blinking himself awake from a sort of dream, he took another step back. Suddenly, he opened the door into his room. He stopped in the doorway, looking back at Y/N. Again, he tried to say something that must have died on the tip of his tongue, because again, he did not utter a word. It looked like he physically could not say them out loud. Instead, he closed the door, leaving Y/N standing alone out in the dark hallway.

Y/N’s eyes rested on the door to the bathroom, trying to go over in her head where it had just happened. Had… Had Harry just walked away just now? Had he teased her in the pub, then done almost the same just now, only to walk away? What had gone wrong? Why had he not kissed her? What had made him step away? What had made him stop? Y/N could not answer a single one of the questions, and she doubted Harry would give her any. She closed her eyes, resting her head against her door behind her. This was exactly why she had not wanted to live with Harry, this was why she had not given in to his charms and flirts before. Now, because of what had just happened, because of how awkward that had just been, they were back to square one. Just living under the same roof as him infuriated her. She could not fucking stand Harry Styles.

NEXT UPDATE: Sunday, 4th April, 9PM GMT!

Huge thanks to my AMAZING beta readers! 🏛️ @aileenacoustic 🏛️ @devil-in-bw-the-sheets​​ 🏛️ @sunflowerstache​ 🏛️ @fromyourstrulyh​​ 🏛️

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Your from the UK right??? Not to make u sad but imagine going to Asda with Ben at 2 in the morning (u only went for some milk) and u end up coming out with almost the entire shop in ur trolley 😂😂 Happens to the best of us

YAY

“We’re only going for milk.” He quietly mumbled as he aimed the keys at the car and pressed the lock button, hearing the sound of the mechanisms working to ensure the car wouldn’t get stolen from the car park. He held his hand out for you to take before he crossed the zebra crossings, giving a silent nod to a car that’d stopped so the two of you could pass.

It was a gentle reminder but also a jest at himself, considering the last time he’d gone to Asda this late, he’d returned home with a new DVD player for your living room, an abundance of on-sale Easter chocolate, and a DIY friendship bracelets set (it was located in the 6 years and over section, but he wouldn’t tell anyone that part.)

The bracelets aforementioned had been tied to your wrists for a month and a half now, yours was a braided black, white and yellow band while his was black, white and red. He somehow matched his outfit, black jogging bottoms, a red Nike hoodie and the best part of all…. socks with sliders. You’d claim that if he wore those out of the house, you’d pretend not to know him, but later decided that it was more endearing than embarrassing. His socks were black with red love hearts printed all over them, some you’d got him for Valentine’s Day as he claimed that “a pair of socks is the best present you could ever buy a man.”

You, on the other hand, wore a pair of black leggings, paired with an extremely worn “Rolling Stones 1979 Tour” acid wash t-shirt. Ben had insisted that you wear one of his jackets, given the fact that your local Asda always seemed to be freezing around this time, so it was topped off with a navy blue Nike Air Max windbreaker. Your fluffy bed socks really pulled the outfit together.

You each had one of Ben’s AirPods in your ear, currently listening to a song by The Lumineers, one that Ben described to you as making him feel as if he was “running down a sandy beach trying to get to you.” His pinky finger slid around your pinky finger as he strayed to the shelter where all the trolleys (shopping carts) were located.

He always pushed the trolley, claiming his driving skills were better than yours, but you knew the only reason he enjoyed pushing them so much was so he could “fly down the aisles”, an act in which he would push the cart extremely fast when there was nobody near you, and lift his feet from the ground, letting the cart take all his weight.

The song ended and changed to a Snoop Dogg song, to which you quirked an eyebrow, asking, “What fucking playlist is this?” with a laugh.

You walked through the sliding doors, Ben already getting distracted by some plants that were on clearance at the front doors, silently placing 2 small plant pots with some sort of pink flower in the middle into the cart.

There was a display as soon as you entered the shop floor, a large green cardboard cut out of the grinch, next to it sitting a handful of Christmas DVD’s, letting all the customers know that they could “Buy 1 Christmas DVD and receive a free 9” pizza”. Ben’s eyes immediately lit up, turning his head towards yours as he exclaimed that Christmas films and food are two of his favourite things ever. You shook your head in disbelief as you picked through the DVD’s, most of them being new and animated films you’d never heard of.

You were looking for one in particular, though you had little faith that it would be in the same pile as these cartoon ones. Ben loved The Nativity, one of the funniest Christmas films in the world, he reckons. He thought Martin Freeman was one of the best actors ever, and that along with Marc Wootton, it had to be the best film ever.

You rifled through the array of cases, finally picking out a white cover that read, “The Nativity!” You placed it in the cart, seeing Ben’s eyes light up as he bounced up and down in excitement, like a child.

“Can we get pepperoni on the pizza? Please!” He whined, earning a “yes” from you, to which he skipped down the aisle and giggled like a schoolboy.

You reached the fridges, Ben picking up 2 pints of milk and putting them in the trolley before giving an accomplished nod.

“Can we ‘ave a look at some vinyls?” He asked, with a pleading pout that he knew always won you over.

“Ooh, yeah actually, Gwil said he wanted the Hamilton vinyl a couple of weeks ago. Might be a good present, yeah?” You suggested, knowing it would result in Ben realising he hadn’t yet bought Christmas presents for any of his friends yet, something you’d been trying to gently remind him of for the last couple of weeks.

You made your way to the music section, getting distracted by anything and everything you could find. Ben was clinging onto a t-shirt with a green dinosaur on it, lit up by Christmas lights with a star on top of its head, the phrase “Tree-Rex” printed underneath it.

He held up the knitted fabric to you, and you both whispered, “Joe.” at the exact same time. It was folded and placed into the cart.

A pack of 250 small Christmas cards was the next thing to grab your attention, Ben telling you that the two of you “had to send the neighbours a card this year, considering the amount of times they’ve had to endure foolish giggles and the  creaky bed really late at night!” You’d simply nodded with a chuckle, though he didn’t put them in straight away. He noticed the box had been busted open at the top and went on a hunt for an unopened box. He reached his arm all the way back into the shelf, jokingly asking you to hold his hand so he didn’t get lost. He finally grabbed a pack, throwing them into the trolley from about a meter away and doing a celebratory dance when they went in.

One of the lights overhead flickered, which caused Ben to turn to you with an over-exaggerated gasp, claiming “Asda is haunted!!!!” and running away from you frantically. You guffawed at his antics, lightly jogging after him while trying to catch your breath from laughing.

After collecting your pizza on the way to the music section, Ben made a quick turn down the homeware section. He browsed the cushion cases, holding up a few colours and patterns that he thought may match your living room sofa, all of which received a horrified glare from you (this was the exact reason you didn’t let him take the lead when you decided to start decorating your flat together… his first suggestion was warm brown walls with a stripy turquoise and black sofa…)

He reached the mirror section, finding an extremely large plain mirror, with no frame, slowly running his finger over the edge of it.

“Might buy us this for Christmas.” He stated.

Your brows raised in confusion, tilting your head to tell him you were unsure why he’d said it.

“One of them naughty mirrors…… when you put it on the ceiling so I’d be able to see everything when you’re ridi-“  your hand quickly shot over his mouth, your eyes widening as you took in what he meant. You could feel his lips sporting a smirk beneath your palm. You shook your head and giggled along with him.

“C'mon babe… know you’d love seeing this juicy cheeks every time I’m on top of you…” you lightly smacked his chest and delivered a sharp, yet humorous, “enough!”.

Once you’d finally made it to the music section, Ben appeared to be in his element. He’d picked up the Hamilton vinyl for Gwilym, as well as a new Ariana Grande record for Lucy. He was eyeing up Taylor Swift’s newest release, hoping you wouldn’t notice when he slipped it into the cart. He groaned when you looked him directly in the eyes and shook your head with a knowing smile on your face.

“I was gonna give you that for Christmas! Now you’ve ruined the surprise!” He whined with a pout.

“You are all I want for Christmas.” You replied, already cringing wondering if anyone else had heard you.

He, too, shook his head, but still gave you a quick kiss on the cheek to show his appreciation for you.

The next aisle was the clearance aisle. This was a dangerous one for Ben. His Mum had always taught him “never to pass up a bargain, cause you’ll see it one day, regret not buying it, go back the next day and it’ll be gone!”.

Within 5 minutes of browsing the shelves, he’d picked up a large Christmas-themed Yankee Candle gift set for his brother, a turkey-shaped dog toy for Frankie (this one you’d suggested) as well as a pack of 3 photo frames and a new flower vase for his mum.

Walking to the checkout was always a dangerous game, as the bakery part of the shop was located right next to all the tills. He’d always claim to be “just looking” while you unloaded the trolley onto the moving belt so the cashier could scan your items, and most times he only came back with a box of flapjacks or at the most, 2 jam donuts and a reduced fat chocolate eclair cake.

What you weren’t expecting today, however, was for your boyfriend to return with a basket he’d picked up from somewhere, filled with pastries and cakes that made your mouth water.

“These’ll be alright til Christmas Eve won’t they? Can watch Nativity with our little pizza ‘n then fill ourselves wi’ these after? Yeah?” You didn’t really get a chance to reply before the food was placed down onto the belt. You’d never seen him so happy with himself, thinking he’d just come up with the best idea in the entire world, even though you’d done basically the same thing for the last 2 years of spending Christmas together.

The cashier gave you your total, a whopping £110, even though you’d originally come in for 2 pints of milk, which should’ve brought your total to around…. £3.

He shook his head with a small smile as he took his card out of his wallet, swiping it over the reader and thanking the lady when she gave him his receipt. He rolled the trolley out onto the car park, you following closely behind telling him to unlock the car so you’d be able to hear the beep it made and find it, considering how dark it was outside. After locating the vehicle, he gently placed all the items in the backseat, taking extra care to make sure the pizza was cushioned by Joe’s new shirt and Frankie’s new toy. He dropped the trolley back off at the shelter before getting into the car, strapping his seatbelt and turning the radio on.

Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” filled the speakers, causing Ben to let out a quiet, “What a fuckin’ banger!”.

You couldn’t resist the urge to lean over and give him a peck on the cheek and a ruffle of his hair. You simply were having a wonderful Christmas time.

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt.8

Shopping with Shiro was god awkward. Being a local, everyone was too damn cheerful as they did polite thing and say hello, some asking who Shiro was, and another pondering the question which would lead to rumours at a later date. Lance didn’t like to brag, but he was pretty well known in Garrison for making a “haunted house” his home. There weren’t any ghosts there, only the long dead skeletons of rats and mice, and the occasional spot of mould. He was also well known as being a bit “odd”, 26 with no partner struck some of the older community as a bit strange, as did the fact that he’d live in such a large home alone. Still, Lance blended himself in as seamlessly as he could. Earlier in the year he’d thought about picking up a few shifts at a local bar, only to change his mind over the fear of somehow cutting him and cursing the local drunks. Plus, people really sucked when they were drunk. He was more than likely to blow a fuse if he had to be flirted with every single damn shift simply because he looked at the peak of his youth.

Sticking to his usual routine of picking random things that he knew he could make a meal from, he found himself schooling Shiro in the ways of bulk savings, and discount brands. Shiro didn’t know how to process that he was a vampire who ate garlic... other foods in general. He really wasn’t living up to his role as a vampire at all, yet, despite how hard he tried not to, part of him decided it had to go and like Shiro as a person, despite the fact he’d clearly vandalised his own car and lied through his teeth when they’d met. Buying way too much food, the dude at the check out pretty much had bug eyes when it came to loading up the belt, because Lance never brought as much he was right then, then paying for it as Shiro insisted on placing the bags back in the trolley, as it was “the least he could do, all things considered”. Lance kept trying to consider him a pain, but now he was actually wondering if this had been how his family felt when he’d suddenly come back home different to the rest of them. He wanted to ring his Mami and ask her advice over the whole matter, but the idea of her baby boy living with two men who kill vampires for a living would send into a fit of hysterics over his safety.

Taking his keys from him, Shiro was good at insisting things. Insisting he needed his rest, and that he should cover his face so the sun’s rays wouldn’t burn up his skin. Shiro was fast feeling like a big brother that Lance had desperately wanted, but denied he needed. The fact that Shiro didn’t seem to want to murder him left him with all kinds of conflicted feelings that were too muddled to sort out. He was a vampire, Shiro was a hunter, that was the black and white of it, those damn shades of grey in between were making all of this far more difficult than it needed to be.

A tad too proud of an inanimate object, his bronco was a good girl, not starting for Shiro until the third time he tried to turn over the engine. Not used to the closeness of the H on the clutch, Shiro ground the gears more than once, then proceeded to bunny hop over that damn ditch in Lance’s driveway. Forget Shiro being the older brother, he was giving Lance’s younger self a run for his money, though his problem had been that even at accelerated speeds things seemed slower than the normal speed limit. His glasses helped with that, as had keeping the one car for his adult life. Bunny hopping to a stop in front of Lance’s house, Shiro shot him an embarrassed look, Lance quick to reassure him he wasn’t about to tell anyone over the mistreatment of his beloved girl.

Getting the shopping inside was a whole other drama as he wasn’t allowed to help with that either. Sent to his living room, he found Shiro had made himself at home, cleaning up the trashed remains into something more put together yet nowhere near Lance’s high standards. He still needed a new coffee table, provided he’d be living long enough to enjoy it. With that room not needing dire attention, Lance found himself in his kitchen, not trusting Shiro to be near any open fire unsupervised. The clock already read 4:30pm, a little, lot, later than he would have liked the time to be. Lugging the last of the shopping bags in, Shiro hefted a sigh of relief before dropping himself down in the first available dining chair. Boy, if the man thought things ended there, he was in for a tough ride.

Waiting all of thirty second for Shiro to start relaxing, Lance clapped his hands, earning himself a groan

“What are you doing sitting down?”

“Wha...?”

“The real work starts now that we’re home. We’ve got a dinner party to cook for, and don’t think your lack of kitchen prowess is getting you out of it. You’re staying under my roof, which means you’re helping out. Besides, “Sleeping Beauty”, is gonna wanna eat sometime before he expires of old age”

Shiro sighed as he rose to his feet

“You’re right. You’re really serious about this, aren’t you?”

“If you’re asking if I’m serious about my friends enjoying themselves, then yes I am. If you’re asking about Keith, he’s got a nice enough face, but that’s as far as it goes. He won’t eat what I cook, unless you want to lie to him about it. So, you’re helping, that way you can tell him the nasty blood sucker didn’t taint his precious food”

“That comment... it, um, it really got under your skin, didn’t it?”

“It’d be like me slandering all you hunters as wild beast killing Barbarians. I’ve come across them before, it’s kind of hard not to when you’ve been around a while, they usually prefer to be more direct with their kills”

Shiro nodded, his left hand moving to grab above his elbow on his right arm, as if Lance’s words had triggered him to remember some deep self-conscience secret

“I guess it is. But for the most part we are”

“Touché. I don’t want to admit this, but I don’t think I hate you as much as I should”

“For a vampire you’re not that bad”

“I could have told you that. Now, what does Keith like eating?”

“Something quick and easy”

“Thanks for that. Let’s put it this way, is there anything he’s allergic too?”

“He’s a bit iffy when it comes to milk... I was going to try make him some soup”

Lance couldn’t count the number of ways that could have gone wrong

“I can do soup. I got chicken today, so we’ll do chicken and vegetable for “Madam Dramatics”. You’ll be in charge of slicing things. I assume you’re skilled with a blade enough to know not to stab the vampire with pointy end”

“I’ve been around a blade or two”

“Good. Wash your hands then wash the vegetable”

Shiro stared at him blankly, Lance groaning

“Okay. I’ll wash the vegetables. You can work a peeler right?”

“I don’t know...”

Lance cast Shiro a serious frown. Vegetable peelers had come a long way since Lance was a child, but there were now easier than ever. Noticing the minute movements of Shiro’s lips, Lance wanted to smack him, yet instead he did the adult thing and used his words

“You’re fucking with me, aren’t you?”

“Maybe a little”

“You know what, I take it all back. You’re not like an older brother, you’re like a dead beat father. Get to work on the vegetables while I start on the rest”

Having Shiro in the kitchen nearly ruined the joy of cooking forever. Lance didn’t really enjoy cooking the way Hunk did, but giving up on human food wasn’t an option when he was just another normal human being. He felt he’d be giving into his curse to give it up completely, and if he had the money, why not spoil his friends with some really good food? Asking Shiro to use the bones to make a chicken broth resulted in the bones being burnt. Then Shiro left the tea towel a fraction too close to the stove top and that started to smoulder. By the time the clock struck five, and that big beautiful best friend of his, also known as Hunk, walked through the kitchen door, Lance was nearly crying tears of frustration. He’d tasted Shiro’s soup, then promptly rushed to the kitchen sink to throw up, tiny flecks of metal stared up at him and Lance cursed Keith again. Walking up to Hunk, Lance wrapped his arms around him

“Thank god, you’re here”

Patting Lance’s back, Hunk laughed nervously

“Um, thanks, man. Hello, Shiro. Nice to, um, see you again”

“Keith left his camera behind, he’s bad in the morning without his caffeine. Lance offered to let us stay for dinner. We came to collect it. You know how it is”

Hunk knew how unhappy Lance was about house guests. His friends knew that staying in his house wasn’t an invite just any old random got, unless it came from Pidge

“Man, it’s lucky that you left it here and not somewhere else. Not everyone is as kind hearted as Lance”

With his face so close to Hunk’s neck, Lance could hear Hunk’s heartbeat. He could see the veins that carried that fresh blood to and from Hunk’s brain. He’d never feed from him, but Lance was definitely having control issues. He needed blood, he needed to bring himself back under control. His body felt like he was wearing the meat suit of a stranger

“Man, are you okay? You’re totally bundled up”

“I’m fine, Hunkeroo. Just a bit of a sniffle, probably from that window breaking. Shiro’s volunteered to be your sous chef for the evening, thought I wouldn’t trust him with anything other than the chicken soup”

Hunk nodded, Lance stepping back out of his hold. Thank god he was so thickly padded Hunk couldn’t feel him shivering

“Wait, if Shiro’s here, where’s Keith?”

Lance opened his mouth, but it was Shiro’s voice that piped up

“Keith doesn’t like to admit it, but he gets pretty bad car sickness. He needed a nap before dinner to sleep it off”

Hunk nodded sympathetically

“I get that too. It’s horrible. I’ve got this new medication I’m on that really seems to help, I can give him the name if it’ll help”

“I don’t see the harm”

Shiro lied so naturally that Lance wondered if Keith did get car sick. Keith’s bad arse image was in tatters now. The next time the idiot tried to pick a fight him, Lance wasn’t going to hesitate in teaching his ego a lesson

“Right, well. Shiro’s here to help, he can’t be left unwatched. This one has the skill of burning water in an off kettle. I need to check my work phone, and I want to check in with Miriam”

Shiro questioned

“Miriam?”

Hunk nodded, already slipping into chef mode

“That’s his grandmother. Sure, dude. Take your time, but you know, not too much time...”

Hunk was taking a leap of faith, taking Lance’s “trust” of Shiro to mean he could take those tentative steps too. Hunk’s naturally loveable and huge hearted self didn’t need much of an excuse to love somebody. He prayed that whatever happened, Shiro would spare Hunk the pain of a broken friendship.

The door to Lance’s office had been left ajar. Making the most of it, Blue was curled up on his office chair, Lance softening immediately at the sight of his princess

“Blue... hey, baby girl”

Blue let out a “rowrr”, rolling over and stretching herself out in the chair, her head turning his way as it bobbed a little, like she couldn’t quite focus. With her precious little toes reaching towards him, Lance smiled down at his girl, not wanting to lift her off the chair where she was so comfortable. Walking over, he knelt down, scratching between Blue’s ears as she nudged up into the pats

“So this is where you’ve been? Daddy’s sorry. I left you all alone, my baby”

Laying his cheek on Blue, her fur tickled his nose, still too hypersensitive, but finding peace in Blue’s strong heartbeat. What was happening to him? All of this was strange, all of these heightened senses were scary. Disgruntled over being reduced to his pillow, Blue moved from beneath him, sticking her butt in his face in a half kind of squat as she licked her back, an accusing glare cast in his direction

“You’re the one who moved. I didn’t want to disturb you”

He swore Blue understood every word, his girl quick to jump off the chair and strut away out the door.

Sighing as he was left alone, Lance hadn’t actually wanted to call his Mami. He didn’t want her knowing he was sick or stressed, but his list of go to people were short. With his body changing, he figured he should reach out to Coran for answers, but was scared off at the idea that Shiro or Keith might have bugged his office. Vatican sanctioned hunters were no joke. God’s love was found in the light, while his species were seen as unworthy night freaks that should be decapitated at the first opportune moment. It wasn’t like him to be so depressed, he needed to get his shit together and keep strong, so why was he letting himself spiral like this? He’d met hunters before, forced to flee long ago and barely in his late 20’s. He thought he’d done such a good job of blending in, of being likeable to everyone. Now he was just too damn scared to think of his next move. A truce between him and Shiro could surely not last longer than tonight. Shiro only agreed not to kill him due to his human friends. It wasn’t fair. He didn’t want to drink Keith’s blood in the first place, so why did he have to be punished when he’d pretty much saved Keith from himself.

“Freeze, bloodsucker”

What happened to Keith being in bed? So weak he needed his big brother to fend for him? Turning his head, he rested his other cheek on the chair as he looked to Keith. Keith looked sleepy, yet unamazingly alive. A proper nap would fix up much of his appearance, as would a series of face masks to help with the whole “black bag panda” look he was rocking. Pointing a gun in his direction, Lance couldn’t even be surprised by it

“Just so you know, Shiro and I have a truce at the moment because there’s a human in the house”

“You think I care? You fucking turned me”

Lance moved his head again, flipping back to the other cheek and staring at his desk

“You’re not a vampire”

“I am too! You bit me”

“You punched me in the teeth”

“You still turned me!”

“Keith, fuck off. You’re not a vampire”

“I am! I received a vampire’s bite”

“Nope”

“I’m turning. I can feel it. My body feels different”

“That’s because you’re a dumbarse. Relax, you’re still human”

“I’m not! You ruined my life, the least you can do is die!”

Before Keith could react, Lance was standing in front of him. Grabbing the muzzle of the gun, he held it up to his chest in line with his undead heart

“You’re not a vampire. Fucking shoot me if you want to, but I never fucking turned you”

It was interesting to hear Keith’s heart begin to race with fear. His eyes were something else, Lance staring him dead in the eyes, feeling like those eyes could steal his very soul

“You turned me”

“I didn’t turn you. Now, either you shoot me right here, or you go back to bed like a good little boy. Shiro’s worried enough about you as it is”

“You have no right...”

“I have no right mentioning his name? Is that it? Sorry to break it to you, but until tomorrow morning, and my friends have all gone home safely, your stupid arse is stuck here. Now, I’m going to have a bite to drink while you go back to bed. Neither of us are going to tell Shiro you pulled a gun on me while a human was in the house, and you’re going to get through you think mullet covered head, you are not a vampire”

Letting the gun go, Lance turned and walked back to his desk, making a show of calmly pulling down a wine glass and opening his safe. His blood supply had been fucking halved, probably by Keith, and Lance kind of hoped that the idiot would have taken a sip by now and see he was still the stupid human he’d always been. Feeling Keith’s eyes remain on him, Lance sighed

“Can’t a man get a moment of privacy in his own home?”

“How can I trust you? How do I know you aren’t planning on pulling out your own gun”

“Because you fucking tossed my office already. If there a gun in here, your dumbarse would have found it. Now, shoo”

Keith did not “shoo”, either the whole encounter had taken so long Shiro got worried, or Hunk had mentioned Lance was headed to his office, whatever it was, Shiro didn’t take long to interrupt the one sided staring match

“Keith! What are you doing out of bed?”

With Shiro finally there to break the tension, Lance poured himself out a third of the blood bag

“I’m not human any more, Shiro...”

“Keith. I get that this change is hard for you, but we’re going to get through this together. Lance has people over tonight, we can’t make a move until they’ve left”

“He’s a vampire and he fucking turned me!”

All Keith needed to was start stomping his feet and he’d have impersonating a cranky toddler down pact

“Keith, please. Whatever he’s done to you, I won’t rest until we have a cure. Right now, Lance is only source of information. I know it hard, but you need your rest”

Lance’s opinion of Shiro’s intelligence dropped. He’d told Shiro that Keith wasn’t a vampire. Yet there Shiro was, assuring Keith they’d find a cure. The only cure was death. The whole “kill the sire” thing didn’t work, the two who’d sired Lance had to have been killed off by now... unless they were born into the vampire way of life. Lance actually hadn’t the first clue about how a vampire was “born” and not from being bitten and turned. Perhaps blood in the infants milk? That was the only reasoning he could some up with. Maybe if he hadn’t clung to his human roots, he would have ventured out to learn more about the beast he was.

“Fine. Tonight, and only tonight, I’ll let you off, but come tomorrow, you better tell me everything I need to know before I kill you”

Whooo hoo. One last dinner, at least it’d be with his friends. Keith’s carrying ons were enough to make his headache increase tenfold, bitter as he muttered

“Go away already”

Sasuke comes home - Part 3: You’re special to me

“Man, that cockroach was huge..”, I muttered to myself. It was the third of the day. This kitchen sure was filthy. I had managed to clean out the cabinets under the sink and the sink itself. The stove was wiped down with soap and dried.The fridge needed some serious sponging. Thankfully, I had cleaning supplies in the closet. I was a very proper, clean kid once upon a time. Living in an underground cave and on the road for the rest of my life had shot a bullet through that side of me. I had temporarily started to live like a dirty vagabond because, a dirty vagabond I was.  But now, it was time to revel in wiping down refrigerator gunk. That’s depressing. I sighed woefully as I removed the shelves from the fridge and scrubbed them down with soap water. The whole process must have taken at least an hour to do. Should I have just gone and bought another fridge..  I observed my work of art, a little smirk showing on my lips. With a sense of finality, I reached over and turned on the power to the fridge. I had had the good sense to check the power first of course, and as expected, it hummed to life.  After a quick mop and wipe of the counters, I was ready to hit the market for groceries. I quickly washed up and headed to the village produce market.   Everywhere around me I saw supermarkets and convenience stores. There were a few obasan selling vegetables off to the side, but too few in comparison. I went into one supermarket, feeling strange.  I, Uchiha Sasuke was wheeling a trolley down the vegetables aisle looking for carrots. I felt several pairs of eyes on me as I picked out tomatoes. I got myself some potatoes while another lady busily picked some out too. She handed me a larger potato that she didn’t need in exchange for two small ones from my basket. It calmed me, this simple act, I don’t really know why.  When I was done with vegetables, I went to get myself some condiments and spices. Shoyu was a must, as was sweet vinegar. A little boy came running into the aisle. We both stood side by side looking at all the different spices in little bottles. We both looked on with awe. As he reached for the chilli, I picked it up and handed it to him. “Arigato Sasuke san!”, he yelled cheerfully and ran back the way he had come.  Does everybody know who I am? I got conscious suddenly and readjusted my bangs, making sure to cover up that weird eye. Well, my other eye was weird too put apparently not as weird. I really really really don’t want a kid coming up to me asking to see my Sharingan. I groaned slightly at the possibility and suddenly wished I had just asked one of Kakashi’s chunins to do the shopping. 

I wheeled my cart towards the cashier as fast as I could. As the young woman billed me she said, “Do you cook Sasuke-san?”, beaming at me as she did. I muttered quietly in the affirmative, pretending to be busy picking out the change from my wallet. I grabbed my bags and headed back towards my shitty little flat.  It was about 6 pm on a Saturday. The Saturday that Sakura would be coming over. And bringing things for the apartment. And having dinner with me. And..  My eyes widened with panic. She’s coming to my home. This was very poorly planned. What would we talk about. What happens after dinner, do I just ask her to leave? Will she leave on her own? Dinner guests tended to leave on their own, right? I couldn’t bear to ask her to leave. What if we just talked all night and she fell asleep here. How much would we even talk, that’s not possible. 

I started to wash and cut the vegetables. I had bought some duck as well at the poultry shop next door. I set about cutting off its head and draining the blood from the body. Before I went ahead, I put on an apron I had bought. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any other kinds of aprons at the combini. I felt like an idiot, but it didn’t matter right now. Kiss the shinobi cook would have to do. 

Ridiculous. Itachi used to make duck roast for us when our parents were away. It would take him exactly 3 hours during which he’d get all the sides done. I smiled at the fond memories flooding my mind. I left the skin on the potatoes and cut them the way he’d taught me to. I remembered cutting my pinky finger once while doing this chore. 

Niisan, make chocolate pudding now. Itte ittee. You have to make it now cause it’s my favourite. 

Sasuke! Did you cut yourself just so I’d make that. Seriously, you’re such a- 

Niiiisaaaaaan- 

With a large grin on my face, I started on the sauce. The cut vegetables were boiling. I put in shoyu, chilli powder and vinegar and let it simmer. The duck needed to be cut up, washed and basted. After about half an hour had passed, I put the readied duck breast and legs in the oven. I’d add in the vegetables after about an hour. While the duck cooked, I put some rice in the little steamer I had borrowed from Hinata. I’d fry it up with some ginger to flavour it, to go with the duck.  The clock showed 8 pm before long. The last leg of the preparations was in motion. The duck was sitting with its vegetables, the fatty juices bubbling and bathing them. I took out the duck pieces and put them in the fry pan to glaze with the now cooled sauce. The smells in the kitchen were making me mad with hunger. I contemplated eating a leg or two, nothing she would notice- but then settled for some cola from the fridge. 

At 8:45 pm, the duck, rice and miso soup were ready, sitting on the kitchen counter. I wiped down and brought out plates and chopsticks for us. Carefully, I set the plates down on the little table, the glasses for water, the chopsticks. I even bought napkins for us, the nice smooth velvety kind. I arranged the duck and rice on the table, leaving a bowl of miso each on either side. For a minute or two, I kept fidgeting with the duck breast, aligning it one way or the other. Taking a sharp breath in, I saw the time was 9:05 PM. As I stared at that dusty grey, rectangular clock on the wall I suddenly realized that I had forgotten dessert. Kussoo. I looked up at the ceiling in despair, wishing I had made that chocolate pudding. I would have loved to eat it after this tiring day.  Then I heard a knock on the door. My head snapped in its direction and I immediately walked towards it. Taking a deep breath, I wondered if I should open it with a smile, or if I ought to say something the second I opened it. There you are! or I hope you like duck! No, that would be stupid. Just open the fucking door.  I quietly opened the front door and saw an anxious faced Sakura standing before me. Her hair was put up in a little bun, little chunks of her hair fanning around it, loose strands falling to her neck. Her neck. She was wearing a dress, no sleeves. Her neck was very visible right now.  “Sasuke-kun?”

The color of her dress matched her eyes well, I thought. It was a jade green, her dress. Her neckline went lower than I’ve ever seen. 

“Sasuke-kun.. can I come in..?”  I suddenly snapped out of it and realized that I hadn’t said a word to her for a while now. I now noticed that she had bags on the floor next to her, with little frames and things sticking out. “OH- yeah. Sorry. Come in..”, I managed to say. She started to pick up her things, and I helped her. 

We carried the bags to the couch. “What’s all this?”, I asked her curiously. She beamed at me. “Why they’re for your apartment of course! You asked me to brighten up the place.. right?” 

I started to take out the things from their bags, smiling at them, when in fact I was smiling because she had remembered. Sakura looked embarrassed as I pulled out framed photos of cat after cat, all cartoons or paintings. “Um- it’s a sort of neko overload- sorry”, she said. I started smiling wider as I pulled out a shuriken shape. “Is this for the wall? To hang?”  She nodded gleefully. “I mean. We could have just hung up an old shuriken of yours, but I figured you’d rather use that in actual battle than put it on a wall...”, she explained in a quick breath. 

I found a bundle of cloth in one of the bags that I unfolded. “Oh- perfect. I needed curtains.” 

“You like them? I’m sorry, all they had were Sakura prints-”

I looked at her and smiled. “Red and black are some of my favourite colours-” I stood up and put the curtain against the window to show her. The little sakura flowers were red on a black background. She smiled at my reaction and pointed at the rest of the stuff, starting to apologize again. 

“I really love them. Thank you for getting them for me. The cats are- great. Really..”, I chuckled and tapped the cartoon of a chubby calico. She laughed too.  Then her gaze went to the table with the food on it. Her eyes swallowed in every detail it seemed, which made me nervous. She stood up slowly and turned to me. “You made all of that.. for tonight?”  I felt my cheeks burning and looked away from her eyes, “Yeah.. I hope it tastes good-” She was looking straight at me now. I couldn’t help but make eye contact. Her eyes sparkled as they trailed from my face to my chest. I felt extremely conscious all of a sudden, and also like my chest was ugly for some reason.  She was struggling not to laugh, but a little giggle escaped her pink lips anyway. “That’s a cute apron..”  I stared at her for a second or two, slowly processing what she was referring to. Her lips pulled in different directions as she bit them, to stop the laughter. Then it dawned on me. I quickly put my hands on my chest and scrunched up the cloth to hide it, blushing severely as I did. I started to remove the apron and tried my best to sound dignified, “The stupid shop didn’t have normal aprons so I had to take this silly fucking thing.”  “NO it’s-it’s really cute. Just.. doesn’t go with-you..”, Sakura giggled some more, some strands of hair falling over her face as she shook with laughter. I looked at her, wanting to touch her hair again, smiling at her laughing. There wasn’t a purer sound in the world than that.  “The food will get cold. Let’s eat.”, I said and pulled out a chair for her. I sat opposite her. “Itadakimasu”, we both said in unison and started on our soup. I served her some of the duck and rice with it. “OISHII! SASUKE-KUN! YOU COOK LIKE THIS? WHY HAVEN’T YOU EVER TOLD ME!”  I looked at her, surprised at her reaction. She tended to be loud. “Uh-Yeah I guess. I really haven’t cooked a lot in my life..”, I shrugged it off, not wanting to talk about myself too much. It was strange to be under the spotlight, even if it was a small spotlight between two people at dinner.  “It’s so good, I want to die!”, she said with her mouth full of rice. A grain or two fell out of her mouth and she patted at it with the napkin, looking embarrassed. That made me smile a little too much. She must have thought I was laughing at her. I really hope she didn’t think that.  As we ate our meal, I was panicking slightly. I didn’t know what to talk about. Small dinner banter was really not my thing. I looked up at her from time to time to gauge her mood. She seemed to be in a pleasant mood, but I couldn’t read anything else. She also looked up at me from time to time and smiled. All the things I ought to be saying and all the things I could be saying were flashing through my mind. Instead my eyes strayed to her neckline again. 

In an instant, Sakura’s napkin fell off the side of the table. I was about to pick it up when she stopped me and proceeded to do so herself. That’s when I saw her leg come out of a slit in her dress. I could not for the life of me pull my eyes away. Oh God, you’re being creepy. At least say something while you check her out. Don’t just stare.  I really could not be bothered to come up with something to say at the moment. I could barely manage to chew my food straight. Sakura straightened up and continued to eat. She looked so beautiful in that dress and I hadn’t even worn a nice shirt for the occasion. 

She really did look beautiful. It was a strange feeling, to notice that in a woman. I had noticed it about her before, but this was different. This was very pointedly about her appearance. 

My thoughts went back to when Karin used to dress provocatively around me. That couldn’t have just been coincidence like I had imagined then. She had made some advances too. But it hadn’t fazed me in the least. It was so strange, the difference- how I had felt nothing biting into that woman’s neck, and how I felt just looking at Sakura’s neck right now.  I felt so horrible for looking so much, she had no idea even. It was plain wrong. I forced myself to stare at my empty plate instead. She’s an attractive woman. Sure. She knows that. We all know that in Konoha. You just noticed. That’s nothing to be announced.  I looked away from the table, to one bag that we hadn’t opened. And then I remembered something to say, though I said it unhappily. “I forgot to make dessert-” My voice resounded in a disappointed way.  “Oh I’m so glad! I brought us some flavoured mochi.”, she smiled at me. “It’s my favourite kind, strawberry. I wanted you to try some, my mom makes them.”  I stood up and started to clear her plate. “Sakura isn’t your favourite flavour?”, I smiled back at her. She made a face, “No- sakura mochi is just weird.” She began to help with the dishes. We put them in the sink one by one.  “Well- I like how sakura tastes”, I said unwittingly. Sakura started to go red standing next to me. I don’t think I go red when I’m flustered, but I started to sweat. 

Why are you such a goof. Change the fucking subject, NOW. 

My eyes moved to the unopened paper bag sitting on the couch once again. “What’s in that? Something else for the house?” She looked relieved that I had broken the tension. “The mochi is in there- oh and a little present for you.”  I looked at her perplexed. “Wasn’t all of that enough of a present-”, I laughed.  When we were done with the dishes, we sat on the couch and she brought out the home-made mochi for us. She also pulled out a bottle of sake with a pink ribbon tied around the neck. “Thought you might like this. It’s a nice flavour..”, she placed the bottle on the table.  I chewed on the sticky mochi with delight. It was yummy stuff. “It’s really nice Sakura.” Her legs poked out from the slits in her dress slightly, taking up a large chunk of my attention span. They seemed to be looming up at me. I quietly ate my mochi, trying not to look too hard. 

She adjusted herself a bit to hide them. I felt like screaming. I made her conscious about it because I was staring. What is wrong with me. I’ve seen women before. Why am I behaving like a 13 year old.  The tension between us was very palpable now. She was clearly uncomfortable, probably regretting the whole thing already. I eyed the sake and immediately said, “Why don’t we open that now- that’s a good idea.”  Sakura protested politely, “You don’t have to Sasuke-kun. It’s for you-” I grabbed the bottle and went to find glasses for us. “When am I going to drink something alone anyway..” I found glasses, and washed them a bit, before bringing them to her.  “Well okay. If you’re sure.. I’ll have some-”, she gave in a little too fast. I looked at her suspiciously. “Don’t tell me you drink like Tsunade does now..”, I teased her. She rushed to defend herself, “NO- she doesn’t drink all that much anymore. She’s treated me now and then after a hard week of work that’s all!” I laughed a little and poured for us. “You don’t have to explain all that to me- I’m not judging.”, I clinked my glass with her’s and drained it down my throat in one go. She blinked at me in surprise. “Sasuke-kun, when did you start drinking like that?” I poured some more for myself, thinking back to the days travelling in Hebi. I was so sour all the time, I found that downing a few glasses of sake would help with my mood. I’d stop with that much, cause it was just enough for me to not snap at everyone around me, but not too much that I’d let Karin snuggle up to me and not move.  I downed another glass. “Ah it’s just for the nerves.”  “Why are you nervous?”, she sipped at her glass. She was clearly holding herself back, I could tell. 

I sat very still for some time, thinking about what I could say next. As I sipped my third little glass of sake, I looked at her. “You really drink that slowly? Or are you just trying to be appropriate. Wait-am I being inappropriate? Drinking with you like this?”, the questions kept piling up in my head and I kept vomiting them out with abandon.  She smiled at me slowly. “Well Sasuke-kun, I happen to know that this sake is stronger than the kind I usually take. It’s a special variety.”  I thought back to the sake I used to drink. It was some awful cheap kind that we found in little stores on our travels. It didn’t taste half as good as this did.  “OH-OH I see..”, I exclaimed. I considered being quiet for the rest of the night, but it just didn’t seem to work, my plan.  She sipped some more and crossed one leg over the other. She looked very strong and poised at the moment, leaning back. I turned on my side to face her. My head resting on my hand, I looked at her. 

She began to speak,“Thank you for making this meal for us. You really didn’t have to.. You could’ve ordered in or even made cup ramen for us-”  ”Hey-Hey, I’d never make fucking cup ramen for you the first time you came over...”, I frowned at her, my eyes narrowing. I started to laugh. “I’d make cup ramen for that doggy guy- Kiba or someone if they suddenly came over one night-” She started smiling and biting her lip.  ”Sakura- you’re special. I’d only ever cook a proper meal for you if you came over”, I said to her face. Her eyes fixed on mine, her lips parted slightly. I felt very conscious suddenly and tried to make light of what I had said. “You know that! You’re- you’re a member of team Kakashi- we’ve gone through so much together...” My voice trailed off and my eyes struggled to find a place to rest that wasn’t her eyes or her neck. Her hair seemed to suffice for now. I looked at her hair, the little jade stone comb she had fixed in place, the etching of a flower on the stone...  ”Sasuke-kun...”  A thought occurred to me, a rather scary thought. Before I could process it, I decided to tell her because it was worth sharing. It really was a scary thought. I looked at her alarmed, “I mean, Naruto is a part of team Kakashi too but I don’t mean him. I mean he’s special and all that but that’s not what I meant-”  ”Sasuke-kun!”, Sakura raised her voice a little. My mind snapped to attention. Seeing that, she smiled widely. Then her smile faded until just a little smirk remained on her pink lips. Her eyes lowered as she said, “I’d really love that... you cooking for me, the way you did tonight-”  That look on her face was driving me crazy. I felt like I’d cook every single meal in the day for her just to have her look like that when she talks about it. I’d pack her a bento when she went to the hospital, and she’d look like that when she opens it.  I gulped slowly, the sound of my heart was filling the room. Please don’t hear this. I sipped some more of the sake, trying to calm down. I felt foolish. I was praying she brings up a topic, something we could talk about it and not just have extreme blushy reactions to.  “Where did you even learn to cook so well?”, she asked excitedly. I smiled at her and looked up at the ceiling to remember. “Ah I’ve learnt since I was 5 probably-” I looked back at her face and continued. “Itachi used to cook for us as kids. He was so good at all of this, he was a freaking genius!”, I smiled really wide, my teeth showing. I tried to hide them by pursing my lips, but my eyes glimmered with the memories of a past life. “He would make excuses to our parents, say that he used up all his pocket money- and get more to buy expensive ingredients. Then when they were out, he’d try new recipes and have me taste them.”  I put my legs up on the couch and hugged them to my chest, my eyes glazing over. “He made me the best chocolate pudding ever, every time I’d fall or scrape a knee-” Sakura moved closer to me, and put her legs up on the couch too. I looked at her, she had her chin in her hands, her hands resting on her knees. “EHH really? That’s amazing. What a great niisan-”, she said, her eyes sparkling.  She totally knew I was drunk now. But she didn’t seem to notice. She didn’t care. Sakura just listened to me with her beautiful green eyes pouring over my face, her pink hair bobbing around every time she laughed, her lips always stretching into a smile at just the right moments.  I stopped thinking about what I was saying now. I just talked and talked and talked. I felt like I was 6 years old. “Niisan used to lie to me, saying that he’d teach me the shuriken- but he never did. He just lied to me all the time-”, I said frowning slightly, taking another swig of the sake.  Sakura took the bottle from me and took a small swig too. Her speech was slurring slightly. “Awww- little Sasuke-kun must have annoyed him wanting shuriken practice all the time! You can’t blame him!”  I turned to her feeling indignant. “Well- I didn’t need him. I learnt on my own-” She laughed loudly at me and put her hands on my lap, “Gomen! Gomen! I didn’t mean it like that- awww look at your face-”  I didn’t know what she was talking about. I felt like I ought to be annoyed with her, stop this game right now.  But I couldn’t. I could not stop wanting to play this game where she laughed at me and her giggling was uncontrolled. Her hair was almost all out of her bun now, strands of pink getting in her eyes.  She kept struggling to take the hair out of her eyes, and then going back to laughing. I leaned forward a bit and carefully parted her hair, removing it from her eyes, tucking it behind her ear. 

Sakura stopped laughing. She gulped visibly, and stared at my face like a cornered animal would its hunter. “What-”, I whispered. “I’m not going to eat you-”, I whispered again. She smiled and then chuckled. “Oh- I know that-”  I was very close to her now, her smell strong and intoxicating. I went a little quiet now, trying to gather my thoughts. I felt like it had to be said. I touched her face with my fingers lightly, trailing away. “Thank you for coming tonight..”, I said slowly. I frowned slightly, the memory of bad times filling my head, “I haven’t laughed like this since my parents died...”  She looked at me carefully, seriously. She took my hand and squeezed it with both of hers. Her eyes looked sad, as she nodded slightly at me in understanding. “I want nothing more than to do this for you, any time you want..”, she said to me.  I really wanted to lean in to her lips. I really wanted to hold her face in my hands and part her lips with mine... smell her...bite her. My eyes widened a little, I took a sharp breath, trying to knock out that thought from my head. I can’t bite her- get it together man. I pulled away slightly, ashamed. She seemed to come out of her dream-like state too. She was conscious of her bare legs uncovered now from the slits in her dress. I can’t believe I had actually missed that before. Well, they had my full attention now, and it was uncomfortable to say the least. 

I cleared my throat, and looked at the time. It was half past 2 am. She followed my lead and exclaimed in alarm, “OH MY- is that really the time? It is late- we should head to bed Sasuke-kun...”  I exhaled slowly as we made awkward eye contact. “I mean- my bed- our beds- our s-separate beds-”, she sputtered. I interrupted her, her panic infecting me as well, “Yeah- of course- you’ll be fine getting home? You won’t get lost or anything? It’s dark and you’re- inebriated...”  “Yeah- I’ll be fine. And besides, you’re inebriated too, probably more than I am-” , she giggled at me again. I was starting to absolutely love that giggle. I shrugged, “You know what you’re doing. Sakura-senpai, I have a lot to learn from you-” That little quip made her blush, as expected. I smirked a little at my sly manipulative skills. 

She stood up with me and instantly toppled onto me. I lifted her up, being careful not to let my hands or my eyes linger. I felt awful for enjoying that clumsy exchange as much as I did. She had no idea...  Sakura took the comb out of her hair. Her shoulder-length pink hair, though wild and pretty was now covering up her neck. I was saddened. She made her way to the front door, turned around and beamed. “Oyasuminasai Sasuke-kun!”, she shouted. I cringed and shushed her. “Oyasuminasai Sasuke-kun!”,she repeated but in a forceful whisper now. I chuckled at her and returned the phrase, “Oyasumi.” 

She tiptoed down the stairs of the quiet building and out on to the street. I watched her walk pretty straight for most of the way, till I could not see her anymore. Then, I went inside and threw myself on my bed.  I didn’t want to think about what this night would mean tomorrow. I just knew that I still really wanted to kiss her, really hard. I smiled to myself. How had she known exactly what to say.. My head was filled with images of her laughing as I fell asleep. 

Fist of Fire.8.

“Your first tournament is next week.” The entire classroom collectively choked on their drink. “Wait what?!” yelled back Ricardo. The AHA Combat Team had been training for a few months now, and Reverse had been running them hard. And it was beginning to have results. Ricardo could accurately shoot and move like a gunslinger of old. Riley could move faster than ever, with a punch backing up her speed as well. Emily could now move beyond her usual ‘kicking those below me’ style and for some reason had stopped bullying during her usual hours. Jade chalked it up to being too tired to hate. John has been getting better at moving faster and hitting more often, becoming a mosquito almost. Jade came to find out that quiet girl’s name was Grace, who had an quirk to cause fucking paralysis. Jade had to fix her ‘judging the book by their cover’ style fast, as she was certain it would backfire in the future. 

“Yes, a tournament. In order to keep this club running we have to actually fight other schools. I'm not going to sugarcoat it, it's going to be really tough for you guys. While you all have been improving your abilities and skills, these people have been in the Combat Sport for years. And none of you, save for very specific circumstances, have actually fought someone. So we’re going to fix that today.” Reverse walked to the door and opened it. In came the school nurse pushing a trolley of suit bags. Reverse gave the nurse a handshake before turning to the group. 

“These will be your uniforms for the competitions. They were each made to your measurements you all sent me when I had you sign the waivers. Now, unlike other countries,  the US Combat Sports Association does not allow for specific suit modifications to match a quirk power unless it is to allow body quirks. As such, they are just body suits. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t make them look cool.” He picked up one of the suit bags and opened them up. As he was taking out the suit he gave a small chuckle. “You see, even I have to get a suit, as the club sponsors have to fight each other before the competition to get the first pick of opponents.” Reverse unveils the suit, and it is as best as bodysuit can look. They were accented with blue and gold chevrons along the sleeves and legs, with a white body as a whole. The chevrons all connected to a bright red AHA on the chest. “These suits are made to be breathable and shit like that, but it looks cool too. I based it off of my favorite hero’s uniform. Now, you all will still be required to wear underwear and shit but -” The nurse cleared his throat.

“Oh right. You will be putting these on today for practice. We are going to fight each other, to get you used to how other humans think. Do not worry about getting hurt, my good friend here will put you right back together.” The nurse took a step forward and gave a friendly wave. “Hello hello! I recently bought 70 heads of lettuce, so I believe I can help you all get back to health easily enough!” The students did not know what to make of that statement. Reverse started grabbing his suit and gloves and walking out the door. The students took the cue and rushed to the cart to grab their suit and ran to the bathroom to change.

When they met at the gym, it was obvious to find those who were more comfortable with their body and those who were not.  There were the majority of  students who were trying to cover up parts of them because they were shy, and then there was Riley, who was standing there like a greek statue. The nurse was there with a camera and a giant shopping cart of lettuce head. He had also changed clothes, out his white lab coat and dress shirt and pants to what looks like a red Hawaiian shirt and cargo shorts. He had also donned a pair of sunglasses and brought a lawn chair. He seems to be getting ready for a good show, Jade thought.

Soon after Reverse walked in, and aside from Riley was the one who rocked the suit the most. His suit allowed for small cosmetic modifications, so had it all cut up into separate sleeves, leggings, and the initial torso covering. He also had a helmet over his head, which made him look like a huge buff biker. Jade was drawn away from looking at him when she heard something to the right of her. It was the short shy girl named Grace. She was muttering something under her breath, and had a twinkle in her eye. Her gaze was landing right on Reverse. Gross...thought Jade. Reverse flipped the visor and spoke, “I am going to assign you to pairs of two. You are going to fight each other, one at a time. Emily, Jade, you're up first.” 

It was like Reverse had poured a bucket of ice down her back. Wait, us up first? Right off the bat? Emily seemed to have lost any semblance of the shame she was wearing earlier, her arms dropping to her sides.  And while moments ago she was awash with a sheepish energy, what now radiates from her body was something akin to bloodlust. 

“Eh..Reverse?A word?” “No.” Jade would have to talk to him about that later. The two girls walked away from the group and stepped into a painted ring. The ring was fairly large, about the size of a basketball court. Inside the ring lay several crates that in some areas pile up to create cover within the ring. Reverse leaped from where he stood and landed on the tallest of the piles. 

“Alright, so I'm going to lay out the rules. Follow them or risk disqualification. They are as follows: Do not use lethal force.  That's it.” That's it?!?!?! Jade’s minds bellows. She was already uncomfortable in a suit that seemed to form to her body in a way that makes her very exposed, she has to fight her bully who has beaten her for YEARS without any warning...wait a second.

This could prove to be in my favor.

Reverse jumped away from the crate pile and next to the nurse. Jade looks across the ring straight into Emily’s eyes. “I'm not going to hold back. I'm going to get back at you,” Jade says to Emily, putting as much authority into her voice as she can. “I sincerely doubt it.” Emily put her arms above her head and did a lazy stretch, never breaking eye contact with jade.“This is routine for me, and I’ll treat it as such.” Emily’s reply is delivered with as much nonchalance as one could imagine.”Truth be told, I was afraid i’d be fighting anyone else. But when I heard it was you? I knew I could finally have fun again. It's been so long since we’ve had a moment.”

Reverse picks up a previously hidden bell and punches it. As it rings out across the ring and courtyard, he yells.”FIGHT!”

Immediately, Jade loses sight of Emily. It was almost too fast how she moved. Jade walked forward into the piles of crates and was looking around and up, scared. Around her she hears rustling everywhere, and is spinning in circles.”Stop running! Face me!” Jade calls out. She was not used to this, Emily would always do head-on beatings, she never would…

A crash is heard behind Jade and she turns around to see a crate flying at her. Jade leaps to the side and looks up to see Emily. She was floating in the air, standing on several towers of crates. Her hair seems to have grown exponentially somehow, looking like several spider-legs writhing around her head. A leg shoots forward and nearly misses Jade’s head. Emily starts floating forward, her hair moving like an insect crawling along a wall and pulling her with it. Jade scrambles to her feet and starts charging Emily. Emily’s face was a bit surprised at this, although she did not stop her advance. Jade’s arms started to begin their flame, the gasoline dropping to the floor, when she was clotheslined. A line of hair raised up to head level, near invisible, caused Jade to fly onto her back and knock her head. She looked up from the floor, vision hazy, and saw Emily quite literally lording over her. Emily had a look of complete sadism in her eyes, and was seen trying to stifle a laugh with her hand. “Oh Jade, you can’t ever compete with me. That little stunt you pulled earlier was hilariously funny, but not unexpected.” Tendrils of hair shoot down and restrain Jade in place, and Emily spits on her face. “You’ll never be better than me. Let this serve as a reminder to Know.Your.Place!” Her last word was said with malice, as a bundle of hair turned into a large fist and came rushing to her face and -

Jade woke up once again in the nurse’s office. She had an exploding pain in her head. But it was nothing compared to the pain she felt in her soul. She had lost. Not only lost, she lost to her bully yet again. After all those months of working out, those long nights of learning to control her quirk, those special sessions with Reverse… all for nothing. Why did I even think I could compare to her.. She’s always held herself over me. Jade swings her legs off the bed and stands up, stretching. I’ve been trying to make myself bigger than I am..I thought I could take on my father’s killer. I should have known better. I’m just a teenager. It's probably best to just leave it to Reverse.. Jade goes to the curtain surrounding her bed and pulls it back, expecting to see Reverse again.

But that is not what she sees. She sees Emily, lying unconscious on a bed with several bandages around her head. Her..bald head. Jade looked at her head and saw burn marks around her scalp, where the bandages cover her up. “What the hell!?” Jade audibly says. “You sleep for so long.” Jade turns around and sees Reverse drinking out of smoothie, sitting on the bed adjacent to Emily’s. “An hour shorter than last time, but still. I want to go home y’know?” 

“What the hell happened?!” Jade was scared, but not as much as she was bewildered. 

Reverse spends the next minute draining his smoothie. After a very satisfied burp, he puts his cup down. “Well, it went something like this..”

As the first fell towards Jade’s face, something happened. The courtyard, the whole city, was filled with bright light never really seen to that extent. The air was filled with heat felt before though, as this was Georgia. Emily, momentarily distracted by the sudden flare of light, soon found herself with something very alarming to take care of. She was struck with a bolt of light, pure white and bright light, to the back of her head. And in that strike, the entirety of her hair was lit on fire. And burning to ashes too. The tendrils of her hair began to fall off akin to leaves in a fire, burning away completely in the wind. Reverse shot from his spot next to the nurse and dashed into the air, catching Emily before she hit the ground. The impact of Reverse catching her, in addition to her flaming head, caused her to go unconscious. However, when Reverse was catching her in the air, he hit a crate on accident which fell right on top of..

“You dropped a crate on my head?!” “I don’t think you’re paying attention to the important part of this story.” Reverse stood up and walked to Jade, putting his hand on her shoulder.

“Jade, you summoned the power of the sun. You used your dad’s quirk.”

Full Marks

CHAPTER 6 Description - Ben just so happens to fall head over heels for a Mysterious Man who loves baseball and cracking terrible jokes. Mysterious Man also turns out to be the father of one of Ben’s students. Warnings - Full blown relationship Hardzello, with plenty of angst, fluff and future smut. Word Count - 1,712

The paramedics took another ten minutes to arrive, but Ben hadn’t moved much. Allen had helped him move to sit upright against the filing cabinet, and although he was breathing unaided, his chest was burning from a shortage of oxygen. Although he tired, he just couldn’t get enough air in.

He was lifted onto the ambulance trolley, kept in a sitting position but strapped down across his lower abdomen and legs to hold him upright. An oxygen mask was placed over his face, and Ben couldn’t get enough of the cold air coming in. His nose had clotted up and his mouth wiped to ensure he wasn’t breathing in any dry blood. They began to wheel him out of the class.

Headmaster May stood there waiting, tears in his eyes as he smiled softly at Ben. Someone in his family was hurt, and he couldn’t do anything to stop the pain. Annita stood at his side, holding her husbands arm in comfort. Ben raised a heavy arm to let him know he was alright. They continued down the hallway, and Ben heard a familiar voice call out his name.

Craning his neck, he saw Beth clinging to Joes neck, sniffling as she watched through tearful eyes as Ben wheeled past her. Ben felt his own eyes well up, and it wasn’t helped by the obvious tear tracks staining Joe’s cheeks.

As they went through the main door, Ben caught a glimpse of Rami rushing from the car park, probably coming to comfort his family, but what caused more surprise was Gwilym running from the same parked car.

“Ben!” The Welshman rushed to the trolley, grabbing one of the barriers as the paramedics continued to walk. Another set of eyes scanned his injuries, and Ben wasn’t surprised by the chocked gasp. Everyone had the same reaction. Allen couldn’t even stop from wincing at each wheeze.

Ben grabbed Gwil’s hand, still not willing to talk, and nodded slightly at the paramedics question if he was to travel with them. Gwil and a paramedic climbed into the back, the other paramedic moving to the front with the driver. They didn’t expect his condition to worsen suddenly, so there was no need to crowd the back.

Ben eyed the equipment shuffling to the side as much as the restraints would allow him. He wasn’t overly fond of needles or medicine, would much rather sleep off a headache or cold rather than take a pill. Ben’s heart rate increased as the male paramedic began rifling through one of the draws, not calming when Gwil held his shoulder. He sighed in relief once a heart rate armband was pulled out. The medic made swift work of getting his blood pressure, muttering to himself as he made notes when he tested Ben’s pupils.

It wasn’t long until they arrived at the hospital, and Ben was wheeled into the E.R. Gratefully, Gwilym was allowed with him as they wheeled him into a spare section, pulling the curtain around to offer privacy.

“When I got a phone call,” Gwil fell into the uncomfortable plastic chair next to his bed, “from school saying you got attacked, I was about ready to hijack a car”. Ben chuckled (which turned into a wince) at the mental image of Gwil breaking the law. “I started running there instead”. The house was close enough to Animal Ark that Gwil saw no need of an extra expense of a car to get to work, rather he just walked. “I just got to the end of the road when a car stopped next to me, and low-and-behold, Green Eyes from the other day was leaning out of his window and telling me to get in”.

Ben raised his eyebrows as he continued to stare at Gwilym. He hadn’t been expecting that.

“I don’t know how he knew where I wanted to go, but I didn’t even say anything as we sped towards the school,” Gwil fiddled with the sleeve of his jumper. The thread was beginning to become loose from his distracted habit, and the blue material took all the taller mans attention. Ben hummed next to him, eyes also focusing on the sleeve and the two sat there for a moment, comfortable with one another.

Gwil was used to Ben needed company, and understood that sometimes it worked better when they were both silent. Just having a familiar presence near him would sometimes be enough to calm the blonds nerves. Ben would take the weight of the world on his shoulders and would never burden anyone else with his own, pressing problems. If he was in a bad mood, it has been known for the blond to purposefully look for the worst to give himself a reasoning. It was bad during university, and he missed lectures and seminars due to it, and although it’s gotten better over the years, he still needs that calming mind in stressful or hurtful situations. So here they sat, two best friends on foreign ground, one in need of medical aid and the other there for support, doing what they do best: being there for one another.

--------------------

A nurse had come around and done a brief medical overlook, followed by a doctor and another doctor. They all were shocked at the scales of the injuries but were relieved at the lack of deep damage. “You’ll be fine within three weeks-” doctor Two had said, “won’t be any long term side effects”.

Ben was discharged seven hours after first wheeling through the doors after some observations and blood tests. The oxygen levels in his blood weren’t cause for alarm and the medical staff were happy for him to leave with some prescribed medication and a check up appointment scheduled for the following week.

It was only when Ben and Gwil blinked into the dark outside that they realised that they had no way of getting back to theirs. “Shit,” Ben croaked out, having begun trusting his vocal chords and throat when they had been there for hour two, and could near enough speak normally if he ignored the shooting pain of bruised muscles. Nothing louder than a stage whisper at the moment but he’d get there.

“‘Shit’ indeed,” Gwil mumbled before pulling out his phone and looking up the local taxi service. Uber and Lyft weren’t in use around these small towns, but there were plenty of other taxi services around that would be willing to come pick them up at nearing three in the morning.

Gwil wandered off a few meters as he talked to the driver and gave the address, but Ben was just focusing on how cold it was. Wearing a dress shirt was a good idea for the disaster of a parents evening but not so much for standing outside an isolated hospital in the middle of fucking nowhere. If it wasn’t for Ben’s anxiety surrounding hospitals, he’d suggest that they go and sit in the waiting room, but most of the red plastic seats of the small room were occupied and Ben didn’t feel like sitting in a room with people in pain or on their deathbeds. So, shivering outside was the option.

His taller friend returned, and gave the estimated time of five minutes to him. They both knew that five minutes was being optimistic, and they were correct, because seventeen minutes later, a little silver Honda civic pulled up in front of them and they climbed in. The driver eyed the hand-print bruise on Ben’s neck but said nothing as he began driving back to their house.

It wasn’t long before they scraped together the right amount of change (and a little tip for the late night) and climbed out the car, shivering their way up the front porch and into the familiar presence of their home. Frankie went ballistic, sprinting from Ben’s room and colliding into her owner at full speed. Ben stumbled backwards as he rushed to grab his dog launching herself up his body, and he collided with Gwil, who also then stumbled back out the house. Now holding a wiggling dog in his arms (who was both whining at the absence of Ben and the smell of him whilst also wagging her tail so much that it was hurting Ben trying to hold her), Ben turned and apologised to Gwil, who just shrugged and made his way back inside and into the small kitchen. He placed the bag of medication on the counter top, far away back that Frankie wouldn’t be able to get to them, even if she climbed up again, before making the two of them drinks. Lemon and a generous amount of honey were loaded into Ben’s cracked Jurassic Park mug, and once the steaming water was added, the two shuffled the short distance to the sofa. Found in a charity shop, like most of the rest of the furniture, the old sofa had stains and dog fur embedded deep into its material. Frankie stayed close to Ben’s side, tucked between him and the arm rest and her watchful eyes viewed Ben’s hand movements every time he took a tentative sip.

They didn’t talk about much, Gwil mentioning how Lucy was trying to convince her boyfriend to adopt the three legged, half an ear kitten which had been brought in the week prior, but mainly they watched some of re-runs of a show that neither of them cared about. The only light other than the TV screen on was of the lamp in the corner of the room, placed carefully between the TV stand and bookcase. The warm light reminded Ben of how tired he was, and with heavy eyes, an hour after coming home, Ben uncrossed his legs, wished Gwil a goodnight, placed his mug on the counter and shut himself in his room, Frankie weaving between his legs the entire time.

The blond shrugged off his shirt and dropped his slacks, toeing off his shoes and socks before climbing into bed. He shifted around under the duvet, body aching from the events, but eventually he curled up in the corner in a nest of pillows and blankets and settled down for sleep. It was only then, when he was alone, that he let the tears flow.

I’m so sorry you’ll had to wait so long but thank you for sticking around! Although I am back, I’m afraid it won’t be scheduled posting as I’m unsure when I’ll be having the free time! BUT it would encourage me greatly if you were to leave encouraging messages/reblogs/tags to remind me to keep going

The Pact, Part 8 [Masterlist here]

Pairing: Elijah Mikaelson x Reader

Taglist: @rissyrapp20 @idkhaylijah @curlyhairedblueeyedangel @hides2000 @dolans-lover

Sidenote: for those wondering where we are in the timeline of TWD, I placed it loosely around the time where they’ve got the prison going nicely. It’s been a while since I watched TWD but I’m talking about before they get sick in the prison. There’s also another music recommendation in this chapter! Basically this song is what gave me the idea for the story in the first place. I hope you find it fits the situation as well as I did. 

“Maggie was supposed to gather some supplies. We’re doing well at the prison but we ran out of baby formula-”

“Baby formula? You have a baby? In a prison?” Y/N interrupted Glenn. All four of them stood in the living room of the house they had met in front, a town map on the table in front of them. Glenn had marked the store where Maggie had intended to go, as well as the route she usually took to get there.

Elijah shot Y/N a look that told her not to interrupt Glenn, but she couldn’t help it. She hadn’t seen a baby in the last four years after all, this kind of news was big. Carol nodded. “We do. We’re quite a big group of people actually, if you end up finding what you’re looking for...” Carol’s gaze wandered from Y/N to Elijah, something that Y/N didn’t notice. “...if you end up finding what you’re looking for, you could join us. That is, if you answer our three questions right.” Carol’s gaze still didn’t leave Elijah’s face, and he stared back at her with a grim expression.

“Carol, can we please focus?” Glenn tapped on a spot on the map. “This is the store she was trying to get to. It’s cleared out and unless someone broke in, there’s no way for walkers to enter there. We should start here.” While the rest of them started to form a search plan, Carol kept rather quiet, her eyes still focused on Elijah. He could feel her eyes boring into him and he could only hope that Y/N didn’t notice.

The two of them had greeted Elijah like an old friend, hugs and smiles included. In these times, when people left, you could never be sure you ever saw them again, and Elijah could tell that they were genuinely pleasantly surprised by running into him.

“What are you doing here? Where’s Steve?” Carol and Steve had gotten along well in the time they had spent together, bonding over the mutual experience of being a parent to someone. It was only natural that she would ask for him. When Elijah didn’t reply right away, the smile fell from Carol’s face and Glenn cursed under his breath.

“When? How?” It was sad that these two little words could turn into such loaded questions. Elijah averted her gaze and cleared his throat.

“A few months back. Walkers got him.”

The silence that followed pressed on Elijah’s ears. The three of them mourned their friend for a moment, each of them thinking back to a moment with Steve that they had enjoyed. Elijah however could only think about Y/N and the guilt of keeping her in the dark.

“What are you guys doing here?” He tried changing the subject, but from the look on Carol’s face, he could tell it didn’t slip her attention.

“It’s Maggie. She hasn’t come home from what was supposed to be a routine run.” Glenn rubbed his face. He looked tired, worn out from the worry.

“My apologies. Is there anything we can do?”

“We?” Carol’s tone was sharp, and it poked right where his conscience was guilt-tripping him too.

“...right. There is something you should know.”

“Alright then, that’s the plan. You guys check out this side of the town, and Elijah and I take the other part. You guys got walkie talkies? What frequence are you on?” Y/N clapped her hands together. Somehow, having a straight plan, knowing exactly where to look, it made her feel good. Like they were finally on a good track, even if they weren’t exactly looking for her father. Carol and Glenn had promised to look for signs of her father while they searched their part of the town though, so all of this wouldn’t be in vain. And she knew that her father would have wanted her to help them.

Once they were all prepped, the party split up into groups of two. They had reached peak noon hours and the sun was burning down on them with relentless force. The heat flickered over the pavement and Y/N could tell beads of sweat running down her neck while she and Elijah took the first few streets on their plan.

“How do you know them? When did you guys meet them?” She knew she wasn’t supposed to talk because it made it easier for Elijah to scan the houses, listening intently for any sign of life - or undead, for that matter. But she couldn’t help it. This was the first time in over a year that she had run into someone that knew her father besides Elijah, who, much to Y/N’s dismay, was never very keen on talking about him. She missed her father, and being in the presence of people who had known him just made her miss him more.

She sensed that Elijah hesitated before he replied, and when he spoke, his voice had an edge to it. “A little after your father and I forged our alliance. We met Glenn and a few other men of their group out on a supply run. We joined forces for a while.”

They walked on while Y/N digested his words. She scanned the houses for any sign, anything that might look out of place, even though she knew it was mostly useless. Elijah would hear anything and anyone long before she could see them anyway, but it was a habit. Always be alert. Always check your surroundings. 

“Why do you never want to talk about him?” The question had tumbled from her lips before she knew it. Elijah stopped in his tracks, obviously taken aback by her words. 

“It’s just - I mean, I guess you were friends, right? So why do you never want to talk about him? You always get so cold when I ask you about him.” Y/N shifted uncomfortably and kicked a few stones around. When Elijah didn’t reply, she looked up to find him staring at her with a mix of surprise and... hurt on his face. 

“You know what? Never mind. Forget that I asked.” Y/N hurried on, wanting to leave the uncomfortable situation behind. She already regretted having brought it up at all, considering the look on his face.

“Y/N, wait.” He called out behind her and she stopped, half curious what he was going to say, half worried that he was going to dig into some awful memory that she had opened by accident with her stupid, stupid question. 

“I think it’s time that I tell you someth-” He was cut off by the sound of a gun firing. Y/N and Elijah looked at one another before taking of running into the direction that the sound had come from. They hurried past rows of broken down houses and rusty old cars, Elijah leading the way. While they were running, Elijah drew his machete and Y/N grabbed her axe, both getting mentally ready for a fight before they reached the scene.

Elijah motioned for her to halt in front of an old car shop. They were both breathing heavy, although more from the adrenaline that pursed through their veins rather than the jog here. 

“Stay here.” He motioned for her to stay put, but Y/N wouldn’t have it. 

“Are you crazy? We heard a gunshot! You don’t know what’s inside-” she hissed, but Elijah talked over her.

“And that’s exactly why you’re staying out here.” He headed for the door that hung crooked in its hinges, and despite his orders, Y/N followed him closely at his heels.

“Y/N, wait out here!” He hissed, but she ignored him yet again and slid through the opening. Elijah was about to grab her and pull her back when another shot went off in the garage behind the front desk. Y/N immediately broke into a run for the doors and Elijah had no choice but to follow her if he wanted to protect her and Maggie. Chances were that she was the one firing those shots, which meant that he was in danger, and he was a man of his word. He had promised Glenn that he would help bring Maggie back safe and sound.

Y/N slid to a halt in front of the double doors leading back to the garage and peered through one of the muddy windows. Elijah followed her example and couldn’t help but curse when he saw the insides of the big hall.

“Fuck.” How they slipped under his radar, he had no idea, but there they were - a giant crowd of walkers, roaming around between half-lifted cars, pushed over tool kits and trolleys. And in the middle of them, hanging out of a window of a lifted car was Maggie, yielding a lug wrench and bashing in whatever walker head came in the way of the makeshift weapon.

“I’ll distract them. You go get Maggie out of that car.” Y/N was about to push through the doors when Elijah pulled her back. 

“Have you gone mad? Impossible. I will not risk your life to save another one. I will go inside, whereas you will remain waiting out here.” His brows were furrowed and his tone was stern. With such a large crowd of literal walking danger next to him, next to her, his heart was beating so loud he was sure even she could hear it without supernatural hearing. The mere thought of Y/N ending up hurt, or worse, bitten - he didn’t even dare think about her dying - made his stomach turn. He still hadn’t fully come to terms with what he was feeling for her, not sure what the “what” was yet, but he knew that he would rather die before she got hurt. 

“Elijah, there are too many of them, even for you. What if you get bit? There’s no way I’ll let you go in there alone!” Although she was trying to speak quietly, her last words turned into a shriek. He quickly hushed her and pulled her away from the doors and to the side, afraid one of the undead might hear them. 

“Y/N, this is not a discussion. You will stay out here, even if I have to chain you to the wall.”

“No!” Y/N exclaimed, pushing against him. “I know you want to be the boss of everything, but I won’t let you go alone! I can’t - just - what if you get hurt!”

“I will not get hurt. But I cannot fight knowing you are in there with me, Y/N.”

“Shut the fuck up, Elijah. You can’t fight knowing I’m in there? I can’t stay out here knowing you’re in there. I’m coming with you, and you can’t keep me from doing so. Now let’s go and save Maggie, with each minute that we stand here and fight, we’re wasting valuable time. That car could come crashing down any minute!”

Despite the odd circumstances they were in, surrounded by filth, death and impending danger, with the combined look of desperation and fierceness in Y/N’s eyes, Elijah thought she had never looked more beautiful. And in that moment he didn’t care if he was doing the right thing. 

With one quick move, he spun her around and pinned her between him and the wall. He heard the breath hitch in Y/N’s throat and caught the surprise in her eyes before he leaned his forehead against hers until their noses touched and his lips almost touched hers. 

“Elijah, what-” Y/N began, but left the unspoken question hanging in the air, unfinished. She couldn’t concentrate, her vision seemed to go blurry while all her other senses came to life. She felt electricity buzz where his skin was touching hers, on her nose, her arms where he was holding her, the soft static between them where their bodies almost connected. She could feel his breath on her lips and felt his eyes on her, switching back and forth between her own eyes and lips. Before she could say another word, Elijah leaned in and closed the little gap between them. His lips connected to hers in a harsh, demanding way that left her breathless, but she didn’t care. It was as if his kiss cleared her mind and only left a sense of deep, quiet calmness. In that moment, it didn’t matter that they were about to fight against a bunch of walkers, or that she still hadn’t found her father, or that the world as she knew it had pretty much gone to shit. The only thing that mattered were how his lips felt against hers and how his hands felt on her body. She swung her arms around his neck and pulled him a little closer into him, losing herself in the kiss until a loud banging sound from the garage behind him send them flying apart.

They stood opposite of each other, panting, both trying to make sense of what had just happened. Then a giggle fought its way out of Y/N’s throat, causing Elijah to grin as well. 

“Well, I’m glad we got that out of the way. Now if we can please save that poor man’s girlfriend, so they can do later what we just did.” Y/N steadied herself and grabbed her ax from where it had leaned against the wall. She saw Elijah hesitating and was about to give him another piece of her mind, but then he just nodded.

[Listen to this song.]

“Distract them, and then run. I do not want them in your close proximity. Understood?” He waited for her to nod and she did. He quietly counted to three, and then he kicked the door in, sending it into the crowd and taking a couple of undead with it. 

Y/N rushed into the hall, swinging her ax as she went, leaving a trail of decaying splintered remains behind her. Elijah zoomed around the crowd, chipping away at it from the outside, sending arms, heads and torsos flying.

“Come on you fuckers, follow me! Lunch is over here! Come and get it!” Y/N yelled. She knew she should be scared, but the minute they had set foot into the garage, her fright had made way for an intense adrenaline rush that made her feel powerful and invincible. The herd of walkers was slowly turning their attention away from Maggie and instead focused on Elijah and Y/N, splitting the large crowd in two. Y/N could hear the typical moans and groans growing louder and louder as the number of walkers around her began to grow around her, slowly closing her in, but instead of feeling overpowered, she just felt more determined. She swung her ax relentlessly and brought it down on whatever head  or arm came into her sight, disconnecting jaws from upper mouths, splitting skulls and amputating hands wherever she could. Her blood was pumping in her ears and a thick soup of blood and rotting flesh slowly started to coat her while she hacked away at the party in front of her. 

Elijah made an effort to cause as much havoc as he possibly could. He was proud to see Y/N doing such a good job in a different corner of the hall, although he would have preferred if she had lead the walkers that were following her outside where she could have outrun them. He didn’t have enough time to worry about her though as he was becoming increasingly cornered himself, and a fair amount of hungry undeads were still pushing against the metal bars that kept Maggie’s car up in the air, causing it to shake more than he liked. He continued to chop away with his machete while his other hand decapitated heads all on its own, but the number of walkers didn’t seem to decrease. He was starting to get worried that they might have underestimated the crowd when Carol and Glenn stormed through the backdoor, bringing hellfire with them. 

Between the four of them, their axes, machetes, guns and rifles, they managed to eradicate every single one of the hungry beasts within minutes. Elijah rounded up the most numbers with his supernatural speed, but Y/N, Glenn and Carol killed a great amount themselves. Once Elijah decapitated the last one, he dropped his bloody machete to the ground and patted down his soiled clothes. 

“Well. Wasn’t that fun.” 

Y/N broke into a triumphant grin and made her way over to him to check if he was okay, but Glenn only had eyes for the car. He stumbled over the crowded floor towards the car lift and blinked up at Maggie, who had been watching the show from inside the car, unable to help without injuring herself. 

“Hey babe, you good?” Glenn asked, sounding a little sheepish. He helped Maggie climb out of the car window and the two fell into each other’s arms once she had reached the ground. “You’re a bloody idiot, you know that,” Maggie whined into his shoulder, but her face betrayed her: a look of relief was plastered all over it. 

Y/N was helping Glenn and Maggie load their car while Carol and Elijah stood watch. Elijah suspected that Carol didn’t truly anticipate more danger and wanted to talk to him about Steve instead. He silently watched the three pack the car when Carol quietly addressed him.

“You know it’s wrong. She has a right to know her father has passed away. Where do you think this will go? Do you want to keep her on the road forever?” He felt like a little child getting scolded with that voice she was using. 

“I know. I will tell her soon.” He could feel Carol still looking at him judgingly like she had all day, and he couldn’t blame her for it. He what he was doing wasn’t right. It wasn’t fair to Y/N.

Y/N, Maggie and Glenn were saying their goodbyes at the car, hugging and thanking each other for their help, and Elijah wandered over to join them. 

“Thanks again,” Maggie said and hugged Y/N. “I’m really sorry your father is missing, he’s a nice guy,” she added and gave Y/N a sympathetic look before getting into the car. Elijah shook hands with Glenn and Carol, who gave him one last stern look, then Y/N and Elijah watched the car drive off.

“You know, they asked me to join them in their prison. Apparently they have some kind of system going where they don’t just invite anyone in, but having saved Maggie and you and my dad having been with them before apparently earned us a green card. It would be nice,” Y/N said in a very casual tone that told Elijah that it was anything but casual to her. He sighed and cleared his throat, and with a heavy feeling in his stomach, he turned to her. “Listen... I think we need to talk.”

Y/N gulped at his words. “If this is about the kiss, no big deal, you know, it can happen... heat of the moment thing... fearing for your life... it’s okay, you don’t have to explain yourself,” she said while at the same time trying not to blush - unsuccessfully so. 

“No, it’s not about that, it’s - I - Y/N, I know where your father is.” 

She barely registered his words at first, mentally preparing herself for being let down gently, preparing to hear all about how it just wasn’t the right time for them. Once the words slowly sunk in, she turned towards him, confusion spreading in her head.

“What? How - did you find something earlier?” 

Elijah shook his head no, and she thought to find a look of hurt creeping onto his face. 

“He... he’s dead, Y/N.” 

Y/N blinked at Elijah, the words ringing in her head. He’s dead.

“Don’t be ridiculous. Why would you say that?”

The look of hurt on Elijah’s face slowly grew into a grimace of pain, but Y/N barely registered that. Blood began rushing into her head, the sound of it whooshing in her ears, and she could feel her breath picking up.

“Elijah, why would you say that?” Her voice now showed a hint of panic, and Elijah stepped forward and reached out to her to console her, but Y/N immediately took a step backwards out of reach. 

“It was five months after I had met him. We went into town separately like you and I do, and he got overwhelmed by a group of walkers... I didn’t reach him in time, they had already bitten him in the neck. He asked me to find you before he begged me to take his life, he didn’t want to turn into one of them...” The words now sputtered out of Elijah, like all the time he had kept them in they had bottled up and just waited to be released.

Y/N began to stagger. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing, unable to grasp the true sense of what Elijah was telling her. Surely, this was some kind of mistake, right? He was just pulling a mean stunt on her?

“Elijah, what are you even saying, my dad, he’s...” She couldn’t finish the sentence. She couldn’t say it out loud in fear that once she spoke the words, it might actually become true. Y/N searched Elijah’s face for any sign that he might just be playing a trick on her, but when she saw his tearful eyes, she felt something break inside of her.

“Why - why didn’t you tell me earlier? Why did you let me believe he was alive?” Her words were no more than a whisper, she wasn’t capable of more. It felt like the breath had been knocked out of her, and no matter how hard she tried to gasp for air, her lungs wouldn’t fill again. Her vision blurred and she stumbled backwards. Elijah reached out for her to steady her, but she slapped his hands away.

“Don’t touch me,” she snarled, her face pulled into a grimace of pain and betrayal.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry, I know I shouldn’t have-” Elijah started, but Y/N interrupted him. She couldn’t stand his voice right now, didn’t want to hear any apologies. Nothing of what he had to say could ever make right what he had done to her. He had given her hope and then crushed it within a second, and she hated him for it. The thought of him kissing her earlier now made her sick, and she just wanted to get away from him.

“Fuck off. Leave me the fuck alone. Leave me alone!” She shrieked as Elijah made another step towards her, and before she knew what she was doing, she swung her rifle around her shoulder and fired a shot directly into his heart.

Elijah stopped in his tracks, his eyes widening. He looked down at the entry wound on his chest like he too couldn’t believe what she had just done. He pressed his hands on the hole from which blood was now pouring relentlessly and tried to speak again, but no words left his mouth. Instead, his knees gave away under him and he toppled over, landing face first on the gravel before Y/N’s feet.

She stared at his lifeless body for a while. A sight that would have left her worried out of her mind just this morning now didn’t move her at all. If anything, it brought her satisfaction. She knew she didn’t have long before he would wake up again, and so she picked up her ax, swung her rifle back over her shoulder and started running down the street, back into the direction of the tree where they had stored their supplies in. Her chances of disappearing quickly enough before he woke up were slim, she knew that, but she had to try. There was no way she was going to face that lying bastard ever again. He had used her, for companionship and blood, using her dead father against her.

Dead.

The thought made her stumble and fall, but she was back on her feet within seconds. No time to think now. She had to get away, that was her only priority.

Apartment 54 ♡ Episode One: Are You Trying to Give Me a Boner?

Pairing: Byun Baekhyun X Reader / Park Chanyeol X Reader / Kim Junmyeon X Reader / Zhang Yixing X Reader Rating: 21+ *18 at least* Genre/s: Fluff, Implied Smut,  Summary of Episode: After quitting your previous job you found a cheap apartment that was suitable for you. Your first meeting with your next door neighbours was quite the introduction, but you haven’t even cracked out the bottle of wine yet... Warnings (this episode): Swearing, Talk of Masturbation, Masturbation, Drinking, Impure Thoughts, Kinky Confessions Author: ♡ Admin C ♡

Apartment 54, known to be the ‘cursed apartment’ due to people only staying there for a few months then leaving. The longest anyone has stayed there was seven months, before the couple split and both left. You just retired from your previous job, at age 23. Yeah it seemed early but that job was lacking for you.

You weren’t even paid very well, now you just needed a place to stay for a bit while you sorted yourself out. You have ten thousand dollars saved and ready to support yourself for the time being. As you were carrying groceries to your car you noticed a sign up on a board.

It was an open apartment, one bedroom, one bathroom and a nice kitchen as you could see in the photos. There was a lot of living room space where you could do your yoga, it seemed like the perfect place to live. You grabbed out your phone, holding it up and taking a photo of the sign with the details on who to contact and how much rent was a month.

This was it, this was your chance to get out of the shit hole place you live with your friend and find a new place and start a better life. You glanced at the other signs, seeing if there were any job offerings near the place. There didn’t seem to be but baby steps for now.

“Shit.” Baekhyun threw his head back as he pumped himself, the pornographic moans coming from his computer bringing him closer to his orgasm. The slick sound of his precum mixed with the vaseline echoing but the guys wouldn’t hear him. A soft moan left his lips as his eyes squeezed shut. He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, sucking deeply as he continued at the hard pace.

“Hey dude, I need to borrow your cap.” Chanyeol announced as he walked right into the room, Baekhyun didn’t have time to stuff himself back into his Calvin Klein boxers and just threw the silk sheet over his body before slamming his laptop shut.

“Fucking hell Chanyeol, do you not know how to knock or some shit?” He growled, stuffing himself away and pissed that he now had blue balls.

“It’s nothing I’ve never seen before man, thanks for the cap.” Chanyeol left and a smirk, knowing that Baek would be pissed for the rest of the day because of him most likely. Baekhyun was about to finish himself off when there was a knock on his door.

At least he knocked this time; he thought before mumbling ‘come in.’ Instead of expecting to see the giant enter his room he saw the dwarf and eldest instead.

“I just got back from grocery shopping, come help put shit away if you want food tonight.” Junmyeon said before walking off. He groaned before following out and starting to put things away. Baekhyun was the maturing one, meaning he tried his best to act like an adult but he was just too goofy at times and couldn’t care any less. He’s always been single and prefers one-night stands.

“Baek I’m keeping your cap until I find my one.” Chanyeol was the youngest and the immature one, he was always out partying or doing something reckless. He brought home girls but only the ones who aren’t clingy and want something out of sleeping together. He used to date a girl but that ended when he caught her cheating on him…in his own bed too.

“Is Yixing up yet?” Junmyeon was the eldest and the mature one, always taking care of the boys and making sure they had food. He worked over at the newspaper company not far from their apartment, he earned enough to pay for food and combining some of his money with the boys to pay for rent and bills. He too used to date a girl but it just didn’t really work out, he has gone on dates with girls since then to see if anyone caught his interest but none so far.

“I don’t know, but did you hear me Baek or are you too busy day dreaming about some porn star?” Chanyeol liked to tease Baekhyun a lot, especially about his ‘problem’ which he didn’t even see as a problem. But according to the guys, they reckon he has an addiction or a kink. Either way masturbating several times a day isn’t healthy.

“Shut the fuck up you dumbass! You’re lucky I don’t beat the shit out of you.” Baek barked back at the youngest before continuing the put things away.

“Does everyone have to be fucking loud at this time of the morning?” Yixing walked out, in only his boxers with bed hair and tired eyes. Yixing was very different from the others, he rarely dated, slept around or had anything with a girl. The guys joked that he was into guys but he never confirmed the joke or denied either. He just always shrugged his shoulders and let them think what they want.

He was a very closed off person, the guys spoke to him very few times only when he was in the mood too. He always spent a lot of time at the gym working out and staying in shape. He wasn’t immature or mature he was just…Yixing? He glared at the three boys making a large amount of sound in the kitchen.

“Well good morning to you too. We just finished unpacking all our groceries so you can do some chores when you’re decent.” Junmyeon said sternly.

“What the—” fuck was cut off by the large thud from outside their door, all heads turning towards it before hearing a faint groan followed by a loud sigh.

They all walked towards the door, well Yixing slipped on some sweats and a shirt first before opening up to see a man with a trolley and cardboard boxes being put into Apartment 54. The boys all looked at each other, who was moving in? They don’t remember seeing anyone walking around or touring the apartment.

“Excuse me, do you know who is moving in next door?” Junmyeon asked the guy who was wheeling things into the apartment.

“You boys sure are lucky.” Was all he said with a smirk, Junmyeon had a confused expression on his face. No idea what the guy meant by that at all, he went back inside with the others and closed the door.

“What was that all about?” Baekhyun asked as Junmyeon shrugged his shoulders.

“I don’t know.” Was his only reply, things went silent before they heard it. It had to be the new neighbour’s voice.

“Thank you so much for your help. I hope this can cover it.” They creaked the door open the slightest bit, peeking out to see who the voice belonged to.

“What do you see?” Chanyeol asked eagerly.

“Legs…long, soft, tan—”

“Are you trying to give me a boner?” Baekhyun asked frustrated still.

“Is it a girl? It sounds like a girl.” Junmyeon asked, waiting for Yixing to reply.

“Yeah so does Baekhyun but he’s not a girl.” Chanyeol said before receiving a punch in the dick from Baek.

“Bye~” It was a soft farewell to the man that helped you bring all your boxes up, your felt a little weird when he had looked you up and down but also your fault for wearing short shorts and a low-cut top. Hey, it was hot out. Your hair was thrown up into a pony tail, you popped the lollipop you had just started sucking on back in your mouth.

Enjoying the strawberry flavour that lingered in your mouth from it, Yixing closed the door and sighed.

“New neighbour, hot, short and cute. What do we do?” Yixing said as the boys all just looked at each other dumbfounded.

“Introduce ourselves?” Baekhyun shrugged his shoulders at his own suggestion, not sure if that’s what they were supposed to do. They never had a female neighbour that seemed to be single, hot, short and cute.

They opened their door to see that yours was closed, moving closer they all began to fix themselves up. Checking their breath, fixing their hair and clothes, licking their lips. Junmyeon knocked softly three times, waiting for you to answer. You were annoyed, that guy probably came back for a top or your number.

You walked to the door, opening to see four hot, young and attractive guys all staring at you.

“Oh, uh hi.” You said confused as to why they were at your day.

“Hi, I’m Junmyeon, this is Baekhyun, Chanyeol and Yixing. We live across from you. We heard you moving in and thought we might come over and say hi and welcome you.” You smiled and nodded, silently thanking yourself for your choice of clothing.

“I’m y/n, I just moved in. Come in, the place is a bit bad right now but you know. Being a girl and having all this heavy stuff—”

“We can move it all for you?” The one named Baekhyun suggested, you did need the help moving things around but felt like a bit of a snob.

“I mean, if you want to it would be nice. But you shouldn’t I’ll just call that guy again to come help out.” You said going to pull out your phone but the tall one named Chanyeol spoke up.

“No! Let us do it, we don’t have exactly a ‘welcome’ gift so this can just be it. Besides you’ve already done enough.” His eyes scanned you up and down like you were a snack, he looked ready to jump your bones.

“Moving! You’ve done enough moving boxes and unpacking yourself.” Junmyeon covered up for Chanyeol’s clear sexual comment with a normal one, not wanting to make you uncomfortable even though his own cock was twitching in his briefs as the sight of you and your lack of clothing. 

“Okay, well uhm we could start in the bedroom?” You suggested, the tips of everyone’s ears going slightly pink at how wrong it sounded. This is what happens when four boys are deprived of sex for weeks on end. You smiled and let them follow you to where the guy had just dumped your bed. 

It was in the bedroom yes, but it had been taken apart and you wanted it up against the wall. 

“Instructions?” Yixing asked, looking at the metal pieces of your bed frame. 

“I have no clue, they might be in the box.” You walked over to one of the stacked boxes in the corner and bent over to search through it. Immediately their eyes land on your defined, perfect--you turned around to the sound of Baekhyun coughing obviously must have sucked in too much air. 

“I’ll get you something to drink. Is soda okay?” You asked as they all nodded, you walked into the kitchen, searching through some of the boxes to fish out glasses. You at least had a working fridge that came with the place so when you arrived you made sure anything that needed to be cold was put in there. 

“What is wrong with you Baekhyun? You need to cool it!” Chanyeol hissed, keeping his voice as low as he could so you wouldn’t hear. 

“Me?! You were staring at her ass too fuckwit!” Baekhyun spat back, the two eldest rolling their eyes at their bickering before going back over to where you were previously and fishing out the instructions. 

“This should be easy.” Junmyeon sighed as they both began to sort out pieces and put the bed together. You grabbed glasses and brought them to the boys, approaching the two youngest first who seemed to have been arguing about something but you didn’t intrude. 

“I don’t know if you guys drink coke but it’s all I have for now.” You said with a smile as they thanked you and smiled back. 

Everything got put together like planned, you decided that to celebrate and your welcoming present is they stay for dinner. You ordered take out and sat around the small coffee table, trying to fit all on one couch was hard though that you just ended up sitting on Baekhyun’s lap. 

Until he knew that you would start to feel something that he would be way too embarrassed about and so now you were seated on Junmyeon’s lap. After eating you had grabbed a bottle of wine out and opened it, deciding to play a little drinking game to get to know everyone better. 

Five fingers were up and glasses were full and ready to go. Rules were simple, you simply say something that you have or haven’t done it doesn’t matter and if someone has done it they put a finger down. If they end up with all fingers down they have to drink their entire glass of wine. 

“Never have I ever...gone skinny dipping.” You said, watching as two fingers went down. Junmyeon and Chanyeol, the boys looking at them in shock. 

“Wait so when did you go skinny dipping?” Chanyeol asked trying to get the attention off him. 

“I do it pretty often actually, I used to do it in my pool a lot. I had a hot neighbour who took my virginity. Alright Yixing you’re next.” You said with a smile. 

“Never have I ever...put a bed together.” He said, obviously he was trying to keep things innocent which is what made you want to jump his bones even more. 

“Oh come on! Give us something that someone has actually done.” You said pouting at him. Oh how we wanted to take that bottom lip and bite down on it. 

“Never have I ever...had shower sex.” He said, well there goes your finger. The boys all looking at each other to see no one else put their finger down except for you. 

“You guys haven’t ever? What? But it’s the best, the hot water and steam gets you all lightheaded and wrapping your legs around someone.” The boys didn’t know what to say or think, you were this hot sexy girl who seemed to live for anything. 

“Never have I ever...jacked off to hentai.” Baekhyun said smirking at Chanyeol knowing his finger would go down. 

“You asshole! It was one time!” Chanyeol tried to defend but the boys just giggled. Your mind thought about it, how Chanyeol gets off to the high pitched moans the girls have, the rapeplay that happens. 

“Never have I ever...go five times or more a day.” Chanyeol said obviously trying to get back at Baekhyun. 

“Oh fuck you!” And a finger went down. It was now Junmyeon’s turn, he looked like he was thinking about what to ask.  

“Never have I ever...done BDSM.” His face tinted pink slightly and it did not go by without notice, you couldn’t help the slight smirk. You put down a finger, the boys looking at you in awe. 

“It’s fun, do you guys just have the girl lay in bed when you fuck her?” You asked, no one spoke though. Sex with girls was always quick and simple with the guys, they never really tried anything fun. 

“Have any of you done any other position besides missionary?” You asked, still no answer. 

“Let me tell you the pros and cons of different positions. Baekhyun, help me?” You asked the shy boy sweetly as he clearly gulped before nodding. 

“Get on your knees, just your knees though.” You said and he nodded, getting onto his knees and waiting, the boys watched with interest. You moved towards him on your hands and knees, lust clear in your eyes as your cleavage was on display for him while your ass hung out for the others to see. 

You turned around, pressing your ass right against his clear growing bulge, a light moan passed his lips that didn’t go unnoticed by you. 

“Now grab my pony tail and pull it back, not too hard but just enough for you to control my head movements.” Baekhyun followed, your head now pulled back by your pony tail as you rocked back and forth. 

“Doggy style, you can hit straight angles that you can’t in missionary. And if you’re really kinky you can spank the girl’s ass as you fuck her and pull on her hair. You also get more control of the movement of the hips.” You explained, the boys were all drooling, not really but their eyes said it all. 

Baekhyun was getting way too needy at this point, each time you rocked back against him his bulge was irritated by you. You moved back to your spot on the floor and you all continued the game. 

After the game everyone left leaving you to peace and quiet in your new apartment. While you were snuggled in bed, Junmyeon was trying to get some sleep cause he had work in the morning, Yixing was thinking about your smile and how sweet you are, Chanyeol was texting some girl in his class and Baekhyun was moving his hand up and down. 

He bit his lip as he tried to get himself to cum quickly, you were on his mind. All he could think about was the way you showed everyone that position and your body pressed against his own. How good it would be to feel the real thing. His toes curled as his orgasm approached, why wouldn’t he stop thinking about you? 

“Holy fuck!” He yelled, loud enough for the boys to hear as white long and thick ropes left his cock, he still twitched in his hand as he continued. He knew exactly who you were and where you came from now. 

“Baekhyun shut the fuck up and stop wanking!” Yixing yelled back before silence was all they heard. 

Who surprises the other in the middle of the day at work with lunch?

This also got crazy-long for a short reply so its under a cut again

Adjusting to normality included going back to work. The pay-out from Weyland-Yutani was enough that she didn’t need to ask for her shop back at the docks, however after a case of cabin fever combined with post-traumatic stress sent her into a mental breakdown, her (partner? boyfriend? lover?) suggested she find something to occupy her mind and hands, and possibly get her outside.

It was surreal, being back here after so long away, after so much happened. Here, the private engine shop that serviced everything from cars to crater rovers to flight carriers and segments of space stations, the biggest changes that happened since she had left was that their boss retired, and they hired a new electrical engineer. Oh yes, and they were all rather excited to tell her about the new lift. Utterly mundane.

Still, it was something to do, something to focus on and think on, and throwing herself into her work had always been how she worked through her earlier (though much more minor) issues. The new boss was a previous team member who liked her enough, and everyone welcomed her back with relative warmth. And coming home the first day to someone who had–against orders–made a nice dinner and procured a bottle of wine; followed by a back rub that she wasn’t sure made her more relaxed or more awake than she’d been all evening.

Ripley’s first two weeks went by as such, sometimes having to be nearly pulled out of bed by her well-meaning resident robot. By Friday he noticed, however, that while she always had a piece of toast, or handful of whatever fruit she could find (”Why do you do this to me?” “You don’t eat enough vegetable material and cannot survive off pad thai and pizza alone.” “I did so far and turned out–well, I’m alive aren’t I?”) and always a large mug of some kind of caffeinated drink. Once to his horror she had poured a bottle of emergency energy shot into her travel cup with a soda, and walked out the door as if it was a normal thing for her to do. Considering the level of soda left in the fridge, he realized that she’d been taking one to work each day; but the more he looked over their supply he realized that unless she was buying lunch on her break, she had been having a can of diet soda every day.

“Ripley? Someone’s looking for you,” the kid, one of the newer employees, gave her a cautions glance. He’s mildly afraid of me. Good.  “Looks like a guy from the company.”

“Jesus fuck.”

She sat up, turned off her welding torch and took her mask off, debating between preparing to defend herself, or to just start a loud profanity laced tirade against whatever demon they sent to her.

Instead, she was greeted by a much better scenario entirely.

“Chris,” she sighed. “You’re a cliche.”

“In my defense I didn’t think that you would have been welding on the dock’s electric again. Haven’t they replaced it?”

“Apparently not,” she nodded to an older patch job, about seven feet down where this scene had played out two years ago. “And not that I don’t like seeing your face, but….why are you here?”

“I brought you lunch.”

“You didn’t have to do that,”

“Did you pack lunch?”

“I–”

“A can of coke doesn’t count.”

“Okay so no, but you always cook dinner so I’m fine, really. I prefer to work while everyone else is on break anyway.” she wiped her arm over her forehead, in an attempt to clean up some of the soot and sweat, only succeeding in spreading the grim and adding oil to the mess. Samuels bit back an amused smile. 

“Too late, I already walked here–”

“You walked, that’s like…it’s a fifteen minute commute by trolley how the fuck–”

“My batteries last a little longer than a human’s.”

“……right.”

“And it’s already on your break room table, if you’d like to take your legally required thirty minute break now.”

“Company man to the core processor aren’t you?” she teased lightly, bumping his hip with hers as she walked past him and enjoying the half-second of flustered bewilderment it earned.

The break room table had a steaming bowl of oatmeal that didn’t look like the lumpy instant kind she usually bought, and a plate of various fresh fruits beside it.

“I had fruit this morning,”

“And the suggested amount for a female of your age and activity level is more than one strawberry on your way out the door,”

“I’m not a child,”

“Looking after your health isn’t a way of belittling you, at least not intentionally. I merely want to keep you around for as long as I can.”

Oh. That was sobering.

“How about I promise to pay more attention to my diet and you agree not to micromanage my phsyical health?”

“Agreed,” Amanda sat down at the table, giving his latest creation a hesitant taste, knowing full well it wouldn’t have the three spoons of sugar she usually dumped in hers. None. Still, it wasn’t bad, and she was torn between asking where he learned to cook so well, and not wanting to see his sheepish smile when he, in a guilty tone, mumbled something about just downloading the instructions. 

“Any good?”

“Very, thanks. Sit down, stay a while before you hike back,” 

“….Thank you,”

“You didn’t just thank me for asking you to stay with me?”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever fully adjust to you permitting, requesting my company.”

“Mmm, the adoration is nice now, but it’s gonna get stale quick. Adjust. Get used to it. I told you before that I’m keeping you–until you decide you want to leave. And then please, leave. But for now…” she smiled. “I like the view, and would like you. To. Stay.”

Amanda started to eat, no longer embarrassed at doing so in front of someone that didn’t need to, and Samuels reached across the table for her hand that wasn’t holding a spoon, another marvel, that he could request her touch, and she would grant it with a smile. 

“The last time I was here, I wanted to touch you–oh that sounded…wrong. I meant in a…in the way a human would perhaps give a touch, social contact to give you comfort but even if my programming allowed me to do it…You gave off the sense that you would have broken my hand if I tried.”

“You’re probably right.”

“I love you.”

It didn’t shock her, didn’t surprise her in the least; once he had managed to say the words without stuttering, or outwardly panicking, he had been saying it at random moments, at least once a day. And each time he did it, it still seeped in and sent an icy heat through her. A reminder of the impossibleness that she wasn’t, as she always assumed she was, destined for isolation.

“There’s a supply closet in that door behind me.”

“Relevance?”

“Never mind,” there wasn’t enough time left to her break anyway, but the look he was giving her was melting her from the inside, and even if it wasn’t for sex, she wanted to hide somewhere with him, holding him close and tight, feeling his vitals hum under his skin he’s alive and he’s with me and we are safe, he’s alive, he’s here, we’re safe.

Someone in the main area of the shop starting a metal saw made her jump, and Samuels sprung up from his seat to reach over table, his hands on her shoulders “Easy, luv…”

“Sorry–I’m sorry nothing’s bothered me yet–I was just zoning out and  I–”

“I worry about you. I know you’re safe here, but…I still worry.”

“We’re a mess.”

“At least, for me, a synthetic could probably think of very few people to ‘be a mess with’ than an engineer. I’ve lucked out in every possible way.” he was perched on the side of the table to her right, one hand still on her shoulder, moving up to hold the side of her face.

“I have too. No one’s ever brought me homemade lunch at work before,” she pushed the bowl and plate aside, and sat up next to him, impressed the metal retired-worktable could hold them both. “I’m doing something nice for you tonight. Message me what kind of wine you want, or tea, or beer, or whatever you want. And then anything you can think of, I’ll do it.”

“You don’t have to,” he said softly, as she rest her forehead against his, their noses brushing before she kept hers to one side of his,

“Not just physical; I mean anything. Any movie you want, any updates, upgrades, decor for the flat…Let me do something for you,”

“It isn’t necessary,”

“Please?”

“I’d like…us to read tonight together, maybe work the micro-generator you brought home last week, take a bath, and then you can tell me about this place, and about your first job here,” 

her eyes crinkled a little, where confusion would be on its own with anyone else wanting to know specifics, there was also affection, and an annoying inability to hide her sheer joy at having a connection with another person. Even someone that few others would consider to be a person.

“Why in the world would you care about that?”

“I only know your past on paper, passive and one-sided, told by people that neither liked you nor knew you. And thus far, my dear, every time you display another facet of yourself, I find that my ability to care is only made…stronger. I like that feeling, and both selfishly, and for your own sake, I want to know everything about you that you could share,”

“Tonight….then tonight…like an interview then. You and me.” She leaned on him, and he leaned back with her, supported on the table by his free arm.

“‘Interview is rather clinical, so correct me if I’m wrong but couldn’t ‘learning more about one’s partner’ be considered a date?”

“Well you’re supposed to have those before you move in with someone.”

“I had no idea,” his sarcasm entertained her to no end, if only for how long it had taken her to realize he was capable of it.

“Now you do, and we have a date tonight.”

“Thompson?”

“Yeah?” 

“Who’s in there with Ripley? Boyfriend?”

“Company exec. I think he’s just a ‘droid though, so it can’t be anything too serious.”

“In that case go in and get her, then kick him out.  I don’t like those things–or those people–crawling around my shop poking for code violations.”

“Will do.”

Chapter 26 - Man, it doesn’t show signs of stoppin’ [part 1]

Birds Of a Feather

(title credits: Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!, Dean Martin)

“Aaaand here it is, the last one!” Layla whispered to herself as she put the last package under the Christmas tree. It was Eddie’s present, a nice set of hardcover composition books with a fountain pen and a ballpoint pen – a perfect gift for a writer. She had waited for him to go out for a walk so she could be alone in the house and position all the presents before leaving. He simply waved goodbye and wished her a happy holiday before walking out the door – it all took less than a minute and he was gone. On one hand she had more time to prepare her Christmas surprise for everyone, on the other hand she was disappointed because she was expecting a warmer goodbye. She wasn’t totally surprised though, she was used to Eddie’s mood swings and changes of behaviour: one day he was sweet and caring, actively searching for and apparently enjoying her company, the next one he seemed cold and distant and distracted, like today. He had been like this for a couple of days, after the show at the Moore Theater. <Maybe I did something wrong... Is it because I got jealous when those two girls appeared? What if I said something silly when he put me to bed?> she thought as she was walking towards the door, dragging her trolley suitcase behind her. She felt stupid for always considering herself at the center of people’s attention: after all it was Christmas time and he wasn’t going back home to San Diego, she assumed he probably had family issues or something like that. <What if there’s an ex girlfriend involved?> she kept wondering as she put her coat on. “What did you get me for Christmas?” Layla was suddenly startled by the voice of her friend and roommate – she turned around and saw her staring at her with a red packet in her hands and a smirk plastered on her face. “GOD, SARA! You scared me to death!” “It doesn’t look like a book... No, it ain’t a book – is it a movie? No, it’s too big to be a movie. Is it a collection of movies?” Sara asked feeling up the package then lightly shaking it. “You’ll find out in a few hours, darling!” “C’mon, give me a hint!” “Nah-ah” “Pleeeease” “Ok. It’s not a car” Layla replied with a grin. “... Fuck you, El” “By the way, what are you doing here? I thought you had left already” Layla took a look at her watch while Sara shifted unconfortably on her feet for a couple of seconds before answering. “So you were thinking about leaving without even saying goodbye, huh? I thought you loved me” she said, dragging herself dramatically towards her friend. “I was gonna call from the airport” “You were gonna leave me with a phone call?? Nothing can affect your heart of stone” “I’ll be back in a few days, and you’ll be with your family, it’s not like I’m leaving you here with Jeff or anything” the girl went on and Sara tried to ignore her once again. She cared for Layla, she was her best friend, and lying to her was getting harder and harder. “I think you wanted to leave without talking to me because you didn’t want to hear me talking shit about David and your stupid idea to get back together once again” <Mentioning her WC Boyfriend will surely make her drop the subject> Sara thought as she saw her friend rolling her eyes. “As I already told you, we’re not getting back together, we’re just meeting to clear things up and give a proper closure to our relationship” “I really wish it was true, El” Sara sighed. “It is!” “I know this is what you want now, but I also know that things are gonna be more difficult for you once you see that guy face to face and he starts talking and using his charm on you” “So you think I’m weak...” the girl retorted looking away. “You’re not, you’re strong. If only you knew how strong you are, you’d know you don’t need that asshole in your life.” Sara added and noticed that Layla was getting upset; as much as she hated that jerk, she didn’t want her friend to leave like that “Anyway, it’s actually your life and you have the right to do whatever you want. And I trust you, you’re the sensible one here, I know you’re gonna do the right thing in the end” Layla smiled and tackled Sara in a bear hug. “Thank you, Scroogie! Also for the present I found in my drawer, I’m gonna open it tonight” “Do you wanna know what it is?” Sara asked, still held tight by her friend. “No, I like surprises” Layla let go of her and wrapped her scarf around the neck. “C’mon, a little hint!” “Goodbye, my dear! Oh, you should keep these, I won’t need them in Boston” she grinned and handed her the apartment keys, then pulled her trolley-suitcase and went for the door. “Here’s the hint: it’s not a naked surfer with a red bow wrapped around his-” “MERRY CHRISTMAS, SARA! I’LL CALL YOU TONIGHT!” Layla basically screamed as she left and her roommate was doubled over laughing behind her.

************************************************************************************************ Eddie didn’t really know where he was going, he just wanted to run as far away as he could from his apartment and from the girl who was about to leave to spend Christmas with another guy who wasn’t him. He was almost surprised when he turned left and saw the turbulent motion of the lake water, he stopped and looked around. “I walked up to… Pier 62?” Eddie said to himself as he read the sign and spotted the Aquarium in the distance.   He shrugged and started to walk again, only at a slower pace, until he stopped at a bench, where he decided to sit. He lit up a cigarette as he took in the view of the dark cloudy sky reflecting on the waters of Elliott Bay and tried not to think about how stupid Layla was. <She’s not stupid though, she’s smart… and beautiful… fuck> he shook his head as he tried to ignore those thoughts, then felt the pocket of his jacket, smiling to himself when he found what he was looking for. He pulled out a notebook and a pen and started sketching what he saw – the creases on the water surface slowly growing into waves because of the increasing wind, the darker clouds in the distance, a couple of ferry boats returning to the port, a few people gathered around a fish and chips place on the left. <Why do I have to be like that? I’m lucky, I’m living my dream, making music, I met new nice people, have good friends that are pretty much family to me now, live in an interesting town that’s supposed to be like the center of the world for some. I should be happy. Fuck, I am happy. So this girl doesn’t like me the way I like her? So what? It’s not her fault and it’s not like she owes me anything. She’s lovely and cares for me enough to be considered a true friend and that’s more than I could hope for. I only wish she’d be with someone who loves her and respects her and… Oh shut up, Eddie! You just wish she was with you!> Eddie’s inner monologue went on for a while and he didn’t even notice the raindrops that started falling from the sky. He was brought back to reality when he felt something cold stinging his nose and noticed that the rain had turned into sleet. He shut his notebook and stuck it back in his pocket with the pen, then stood up and pulled the hood over his head as he started to run. The fleet turned into proper snow, which reminded him of a similar scenario many miles and many years away: Chicago, Christmas of 1984, when he first brought his new girlfriend home to meet his mom. Their plane landed incredibly late, their cab from the airport got stuck in traffic during a snow storm and when it was clear it was impossible to move they paid the driver, grabbed their bags and just got out of the car and ran for an hour in the snow to get home in time for dinner, freezing and soaking wet, but together, happy and in love. He was alone now, no hands to warm up with his breath, no turkey in the oven, no little brothers preparing tricks and pranks for him back at home. These thoughts made it look like the way home was taking much longer even though he was running. He breathed a relieved sigh as he walked past the Scarecrow Video Shop because it meant he was almost home, even though it also reminded him once again of the girl who worked there. <As if I wasn’t already thinking enough about her> Eddie ignored the elevator and went for the stairs, silently praying for Layla to be gone already. When he rang the doorbell and nobody answered though, he almost regretted his wish.

************************************************************************************************ “Is it just my impression or Mary Jane sucked a lil’ bit?” “You’re not wrong, Viv – I’m no expert but even I heard that strange squeak she did at the end” “Jesus H. Tap Dancing Christ! Girls, could you please save your gossip for later?? I have tons of glitter on my face and my hair looks like a fuckin’ nest, ugh” Sara rolled her eyes, silently asking herself what she had done to deserve to be stuck in a dressing room with those two dorks – they were technically supposed to help her, but instead chattered about whoever had been involved in the recital. “C’mon, Sara, live a little! You should be glad: that ‘sleep in Heavenly peace’ was horrible – and you hate Mary Jane’s guts!” “Right now I don’t have time to laugh about her poor figure: all I wanna do is reassuming my natural appearance and getting rid of all this fuckin’ glitter that’s comin’ out of my nostrils” “HA! So you admit it: she sucked big time!” “C’mon, Maux, just leave her alone” Vivian smiled at Sara, keeping on removing make-up from her face “And you… don’t you dare insult my glitter again! You looked like a proper little angel” Sara rolled her eyes for the umpteenth time, grinding her teeth every time her friends pulled a bobby pin out of her hair or rubbed cleansing lotion all over her face.   “… I’m still wonderin’ why they didn’t assign Silent Night to you, though” “No big deal, Maux” “Well, I got the feeling that next year it’ll be you singing it!” “I don’t think that next year I’ll be on stage…” “You said the same thing last year, primadonna” “… fuck off, Maux” Sara grumbled, cheeks flushing for the deep embarrassment. “Anyway! You did some justice to O Come, All Ye Faithful” “… and Father Steve was extremely pleased with your decision of singing some verses in Latin – ‘a wonderful surprise, and what an exquisite pronounce’, that’s what he said”   “Oh, great: now the Theology professor attends our recitals too – that’s exactly what I needed, a wonderful surprise” she wrinkled her nose. “Stop bein’ modest; I think that, deep inside, you really appreciate his attention” “… You’re a pain in the ass” “Love you too, honey pie!” Maux blew a kiss in her direction, then proceeded to wave the last bobby pin under her nose. “But it isn’t the time to celebrate yet; you still have to free yourself from Maux’s creation” Through her dollish ringlets Sara gazed at her own dejected reflection, still trapped inside a cloud of red tulle, and let out a deep sigh: her freedom was still far away. When the three girls finally came out, the campus was covered with snow and still heaving with students. “Well, girls – better cut and run if I want to arrive at Sea-Tac on time” Vivian looked at the watch on her wrist, then covered it again with a sleeve. “How much ‘til Cheyenne?” “5 hours and 10, I think… I just hope I’ll be home in time to exchange the presents with my family” “Is it a large one?” “Yup, four brothers but also grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins… we’re a tribe” the girl smiled fondly, then grinned at them “Group hug!” “Have a safe trip and don’t trade us for Wyoming dudes – right, Sara?” “Oh, yeah… yeah, don’t you dare pull that trick on us” “Never! Chicks before dicks” “… did you seriously just said it?” “Viv, don’t mind her! You’re hilarious” Maux reassured her, in between laughs. “Don’t worry: I learnt that it’s how she tells people she actually cares about ‘em…” Vivian threw her arm around Sara’s shoulder “Plus, don’t forget that, when Christmas festivities will be finally over, there’ll be a new recital around the corner…” “… and a new recital means another round of you falling into Viv’s clutches – and mine too!” the other girl almost squealed in delight, making the victim blatantly roll her eyes. “… at least I won’t be seeing the two of you for a couple of weeks – maybe I’ll be able to pull off an Alcatraz” “Shut up, Grinch!” her friends silenced her with a couple of snowballs that perfectly landed on her bonnet. “Say, what’s gotten into you?” “What? What should have gotten into me?” “You were distracted all the time… you still are” “Nope, just tired” “Yeah, Pinocchio, right – just tired” “D’ya think that Vivian’s Republican, holier-than-thou family has rejoiced when they found out to have a daughter named as Pretty Woman’s main character?” “What? Don’t change topic!” “… it’d be interesting to fly to Wyoming, just to stand outside their home with a boombox blasting away Roy Orbison” “… you’re impossible” “Pretty woman, walking down the streeeeeet… pretty woman, the kind I like to meeeeeet…” “I get the message, I get it!” Maux shoved her, then pulled a small package out of her bag “I’m gonna set you free, but not before getting the chance to give you this” “Maux, you shouldn’t have – I didn’t get you anyth-” “Shut up! Do you really think that I don’t know who got me that big book about Elsa Schiaparelli that I found in my bag last week?” Maux forced the package in Sara’s hands “I know it was your Christmas’ early present, I’m not that stupid” “Well, to dot the i’s and cross the t’s-” “Shut up and just open that fuckin’ package!” Sara let out a belly laugh and did just as her friend had commanded, a pair of dangle earrings appearing in her hands: the quartzes reflected blue, green and silver twinkles on her fingers, making her smile. “They’re beautiful – I love this kind of design, thank you” “Come here, you doofus” Maux hugged her, then playfully pushed her away “Now go, spend Christmas Eve with your family and don’t try to fly to Wyoming!” “HA! We’ll see, I can’t guarantee you anything” she followed her friend’s advice and finally went outside the campus. The snow had just resumed to fall.

⌜ * ☆ SCOTTISH SLANG WORDS/PHRASES MASTERLIST

i won’t lie, i rarely use these words/phrases just because where i’m from which is the capital, but where i live a lot of people use it, i was brought up in a a little better area before moving to where i am now, with that being said I just wanted to create a master list of things we say, it all really depends where you’re from as well, so if you’re creating a character from Glasgow you’d give that character a really rough scottish voice and use some scottish slang and that would be called glaswegian, and when you go further up the country the more of these words you’ll most likely here. so just keep in mind not every scottish person speaks like this it depends where you base your character from. 

aye — this is pronounced like eye, it means yes.

a, ah — means, I

a wiz like — means, I was like

am no — means, I’m not

a(h)naw — means, as well

aboot — means, about

aff yer heed — means, off your head

aw — means,  all

a am’ nae — means, i am not

amen’t ah — means, aren’t I

baccy — means, tobacco

bairn — means, child

bampot — i included this bc a tv show had it and actually put up a subtitle saying whit it meant, it means idiot.

banger — firework, but also penis. away you ‘nd chew ma banger.

batter — to beat up

bawbag — have ye heard of hurricane bawbag ?? it means scrotum.

baws — balls.

bawheid — ballhead

boaby — police

boggin — smellin, dirty, that’s boggin

bolt — go away.

buckie — gOT MA BOTTLE OF BUCKIE AND A FIVER DEAL. scottish finest that is buckfast.

burd — girlfriend

cannae — cannot

chum — you gonna chum me to the shops ?? to accompany

claes — clothes

cauld — cold

cummoan — come on

da — dad

dafty — ya dafty, someone is being dumb and silly

dinnae — don’t

diddy — did he?

dingy — to ignore

div — yer a div, an idiot

doon — down, as long as yer haudin’ me doon, doon, doon.... scottish 5h anyone??

dinna ken — don’t know

dug — dog

eh — what ??

empty — when yer parent’s are oot of toon, you’ve got an empty for the night have a fuckin’ party

fae — from

fag — cigarette 

fanny — vagina, but used as an insult, hERE YOU UR A FUCKIN FANNY.

feart — scared

fitba — football/soccer

gaff — house

gan — go

Gaun yersel' - Congratulations gammie - An injured body part ("Canny play, I've got a gammie leg") gaun - going ("am gaun hame"), or, go on/and ("gaun shut the fuck up) gantin'/Gaggin' fur it - begging for - (See her, she's pure gantin' fur sex)

glasgae — glasgow

goat — got

gonnae no dae that — please don’t do that, gonnae no dae that, why? just gonnae no.

gob — mouth, keep yer gob shut

greet — am gonnae greet, i’m going to cry

hame — home

hen — right naw do i look like a fucking chicken?? its our way of saying how are you love, but we say how are ye hen?

hoose — house

how? — why?

how no? — why not?

isnae — is not

jag/jab — injection/punch

janny — janitor

knob — penis

laddie — boy

lecky — electricity

lassie — girl

lugs — ears

mair — more

maist — most

maw/ma — mum

messages — groceries/shopping

mental — insane

mibay — maybe

midden — mess

minger — messy, dirty, smelly person

mink — unhygienic person.

mon(moan) then — challenge to fight

the morn/the morns morning — tomorrow/tomorrow morning

munter — ugly person

nae danger — no chance

naw — no

ned — troublemaker (chav)

nippin — stinging

numpty — the loving way to call someone an idiot

nut — no

oaf — off

Och awa' an' dinna talk pish - You're talking a load of rubbish

oan yer bike/trolley — go away

oot — out

oot yer nut — drunk

pan — pan ma windeez in, break my windows in

pish — piss

pished/plastered — drunk

polis — police

plenty — enough

pure — very, totally

quality — amazing, brilliant

radge — crazy or angry

rat-arsed — lets get drunk

reek — smell bad

raging — angry

scheme — council housing

scooby — clue (no clue)

scram — go away

scran — to eat

sesh — to go out drinking

shan — shame

shite — poo

simmer — calm down

skelp — to hit someone

skint — broke af aka me

solid — hard/tough

speccy — to describe someone who wears glasses

square go — to fight

swally — swallow

tad — tiny bit (it’s a tad small i say when i look at his penis)

tae — to

talking oot yer fanny lips — lying

tan — smash 

wallap (wa-lup) – to hit someone/thing

wan / ane — one

wank — short for wanker, wank, wank, good guy, wank, wank or when a male decides he wants tae cum but he’s got naewan, so he goes for a wank

weegie — someone from glasgow

whae — with?

whit/wit? — what?

windaez — windows

yeez — yous

yer — your

DOTW 51 - Full. With the nursery scene, it would have ended up being waaaaay too long, but now you know what's coming

Eren's had spent a week in hospital, his omega then returning fully over the next two weeks. It was a roller coaster for both of them. Eren still struggling to control emotions. Some days and nights were better than others. Some days Eren couldn't even get out bed, thanks to being exhausted by his nightmares or the inability to get comfortable. Then some days, he couldn't get out of bed without being reduced into a panicking mess over the smallest of things. Like Levi closing a drawer too hard... he'd taken his bad shift out on the cutlery drawer, causing Eren to bolted into the bathroom. He'd stayed there for the better part of three hours before calming down enough to come back out. Then there were the sudden bouts of anger that seemed to well up from nothing at all... He'd bought eggs without thinking about it, eggs still seemingly taboo in the apartment. Eren had lost hit shit over it, throwing each and every single one of the dozen at him with angry screams. If it'd been anyone other than Eren, he would have been pissed. Handling the situation like a mature adult, he'd laughed. He couldn't help it. Eren had run out of curses after the forth egg, just defaulting to calling him a "constipated arsehole", before getting flustered at himself over it all. It'd been adorable. His boyfriend might be ridiculously tall, but he was, as Hanji would describe, an "anger muffin". Impossible to actually be mad at due to the fact he was completely adorable. At 22 weeks, his boyfriend was a force to be reckoned with. His affectionate side had come back, Levi enjoying every second of it. Eren would have dinner or breakfast ready, and a bath waiting for him. His omega seemed to be prefer baths to showers, and didn't want to bathe alone. It only dissolved into sex half the time... He couldn't keep his hands off his mates stomach, pathetically in love with the swell and the future it meant. He was acting completely foolish, almost unlike himself. His protective instincts were only growing stronger, each time he left work, he forced Eren to lock the door properly behind him. It was the only way he could make through his shifts. That and when Eren was awake, they'd message back and forth all day. His omega choosing to throw himself into working through the books Levi had ordered for him. His drive to learn so great, that Levi had been thinking about asking Eren if he'd like to enrol in some online classes, or at least find a way for his boyfriend to get his high school equivalency. With how determined Eren was, he was sure he could manage it, especially with only 18 weeks being left until the due date of their pup. It all seemed like it was approaching too fast. Like if he blinked, he'd miss it, and he didn't want to miss a single thing in both Eren's and their child's life. With things finally looking better, Levi was finally able to bring the nursery issue up with Eren. His boyfriend had plenty of ideas, which surprised him. He'd thought Eren spent his time alone at home napping, cleaning or working on his studies. He hadn't even considered the fact that Eren might sneak into the spare room to take measurements, and compile a basic list of what he wanted via screen shots. All of it was perfect... Almost too perfect... yet quite unlike him, he didn't find himself dwelling on all the "what ifs" of the situation. Labour was dangerous. It'd never been a safer time to be having children, yet 830 women died a day due to pregnancy and complications. Males at an even higher risk as their bodies didn't stretch the way a female did. He knew if the fluid situation didn't happen to level out, that Eren would most likely require a c-section, and he knew Eren would automatically blame himself for it all. Finally getting two days off in a row, Levi had hit cloud nine. He'd spent the morning having lazy sex and snuggles with Eren. Their bed a complete mess by the time the two of the had crawled out of it. This had been followed by a quick hard fuck with Eren bent over the bathroom counter. Then had come showering with, and carefully cleaning out his blissed out omega. Eren coming with a whimper as he did. He'd wanted nothing more than to curl up with Eren on the sofa, and binge on a bunch of bad movies, but they were going shopping for nursery and baby things. His "suppressed" alpha constantly reminding him of the fact, as it wanted to show how good it was at providing for their child. There was also the fact that Eren wanted his hair cut, after trying to cut it himself in the bathroom, and the fact that nearly nothing of the omega's fitted over his swollen stomach anymore. Personally, Levi didn't give two shits if Eren wanted to walk around shirt free, or just in his bra. His lover's body was beautiful, and his developing breasts were perfect for holding onto when he mounted him from behind. He was lucky Eren felt the same way. He'd succeeded in making Eren come in his pants, by toying with his nipples while making out on the sofa. Eren's white dress was the only thing that properly covered his bump. Coupled with a pair of yoga pants and one of Levi's hoodies, his omega really didn't want to wear shoes. There was no way he was letting his boyfriend walk around bared foot getting all sorts of nasty germs all over them. His firm attitude led to Eren crying, but allowing Levi to put shoes on him... while leaving Levi feeling like a bit of an arse. Eren had enough problems as it was. His depression wasn't something magically cured by the return of his omega, it'd just helped to take the edge off. They still had plenty to talk about. For instance, the fact Eren thought himself a murderer, but that was barely remembered once they'd started being physical again. Heading to the closest shopping centre, Eren clung to him adorably... even if it was from anxiety. With his heartburn making breakfast nearly impossible, Levi was determined to do as much as he could for Eren. He'd gotten him to drink some milk, so his stomach wasn't completely empty. Not that it counted as breakfast in his eyes. He'd just have to trust that Eren would let him know when he was hungry. Walking into the department store, Levi snagged a trolley "Now. Anything you like, anything at all, you can get" "Mmm... I know. I, uh... talked to Marco and Hanji a little" "You've been talking to Marco?" "I thought I told you that Hanji brought him to see me. He apologised for being a bad friend... he came and saw me again, without Hanji and we talked a little... it's not like how it used to be, but he's... yeah. It's better" Levi wasn't sure if he liked Eren hanging around Marco again. Not when Jean was such a fucking arsehole. Jean getting into Eren's head, would be... no. Marco had to prove himself to Eren first, then maybe he would be allowed to visit... sans Jean. He might just tear that fucker's throat out if he had the chance "Ok. As long as you're ok with it, then I'll... be ok with it" "Don't worry. I'm not rushing to have them over. Don't give me that look. Your expression said it all" "I might just kill Jean if I see him" Eren swayed, before shaking his head. Fuck. He should have picked his words better. Taking a deep breath, Eren brought himself back under control "You can't do that. Marco's pregnant again" "Again? Haven't they heard of condoms?" "He smelt like it" "How old's Mina now?" "Uh... I think she was born in... November? No. We went on holiday in November. I can't remember, but like 10ish months? It's halfway through September... She looks so much like Marco" "Lucky girl. I wouldn't curse my worst enemy with Jean's looks" Eren giggled "That's harsh. I want our pup to look like you" "I know... but I've seen your baby photos, and I've seen you grow. I would be the luckiest alpha in the world if our pup looked like you" Eren blushed "Aren't you already the luckiest alpha in the world? My throbbing arse says you are" Eren's comment went straight to his dick. It was hard to believe he could still get hard enough how many times he and Eren had indulged in each other's bodies. Clearing his throat, his voice was slightly husky as he replied "Listen here, brat. If you keep that up, the nursery is never going to be done" 22 weeks may be too soon to start preparing the nursery, but it had now been months since he'd suggested it. He wanted to give Eren the chance to change his mind if he wanted, and wanted to give them enough time that they wouldn't be rushing to put everything together. What he'd read online said it was common for omega's to even nest in there when close to their due date. This was their first child. He didn't want to fuck up. That's why he'd chosen to go shopping before cleaning out the room. They could spent today and tomorrow making sure every purchase was just right "I'm just saying..." "And I'm just saying that I love you" "You love me enough to ruin my arse?" "And your breasts, and your mouth..." Eren playfully punched him on the shoulder "It's not my fault everything you do feels... good" "I know this pregnancy hasn't been easy, but... you've really opened up over being intimate" "I still can't... on my own. But with you, I want it. Only with you" "Does it bother you when I touch myself?" Eren's blush deepened "It... it's hot" He hadn't been aiming for a reply, but Eren's mumble was cute "I'm just teasing you" "You're an arsehole, old man" "Yeah. Anyway, baby shopping?" "Shopping for our pup. Not quite baby shopping. I think one is going to be hard enough" "Alright, brat. Point taken" "Good. If you behave, I might be persuaded to give you a treat" "I don't know if I can behave" "Then no treat for you. Come on, I want to get all the soft stuff first. I want to make sure it's all washed and sorted" Eren bopped him on the nose with the tip of his pointer finger. His warm scent rolling over Levi like the fresh rains of a storm, barely a note of anxiety to it. He was so fucking proud of him, even if he was a little shit. Walking a few steps ahead, Eren didn't realise Levi was still rooted to the spot, momentarily stripped of basic functions as rush of love filled his gut with warmth. Why the fuck hadn't he just proposed? Eren knew exactly what he wanted, that was one of the joys of actually going shopping with him. Though pregnant, he wanted to just get in, get everything they'd settled on, and get out... Then they hit the baby clothes. Getting Eren more maternity clothes had been easy. Soft and comfortable yoga pants and stretch belted jeans, couples with a few long sleeved shirts and bras that converted to nursing bras. Baby clothes sent his omega into while different kind of panic. Eren had picked up a soft fleece onesie and broken down. He wasn't crying, but his scent was definitely troubled and everything he picked up, he placed back "Eren, what's wrong?" Placing his hand on his stomach, Eren turned to him. His bright eyes filled with pain "Do you think I deserve to keep this baby?" "What do you mean?" "I... I don't know if I deserve this baby anymore... Levi... what do I do?" "You tell me what's going on, and we figure this out together" "I... my dad... he did something... It was horrible, Levi" Reaching out, Levi took Eren by the arm, gently pulling him close "You're not your father" "He... he took babies from omegas. How many omega's lost their pups because of him... 10 years... hundreds of omegas, Levi. And then he just dies. He dies. He... How do I live with that?" Hushing Eren softly, Levi nuzzled his neck "You live by loving our pup with everything you have" "Why? Why should I get to keep my pup, when they didn't?" "Because you weren't the one to take their pups away. That sin. That sin is a stain on your father, not you" "The sins of the father are inherited by the son" "That's a load of shit. I don't even know my fucking father and I, sure as hell, am not going to start cleaning up his shit. You're not him" "But Levi..." "No. This pup. This pup is ours. You're allowed to want this and to be happy. What he's done, it's not ok. And I will tell you as many times as you need, you will be an amazing mother. You're allowed to be happy and to love this pup" "I feel so guilty. Looking at all this. It's like... they never got to do this with their babies" "That's because the world is shit. They treat omega's like shit and walk all over them to make themselves feel better. It's not fair. To them or to you. I love you, and when you're ready to tell me more, I will listen" Grisha could go choke on a bag of dicks... or maybe a sack of balls, seeing he obviously didn't have a set. What kind of fucked up shit had the man done? And why the fuck... No. he just had no words for him "I don't want to remember, but how do I forget?" "I don't know. I love you, ok?" "I love you too, Levi. I... think maybe we... I don't know..." "We can go home, if you want? Or we can get a few more things. Or we can get the furniture? Whatever you want to do" "Can we do furniture? This is just..." "You don't have to explain. I understand" "I really... I don't even know what I'm saying now" "You're saying how much you love me, and how we're going to order way too much food when we get home. You're going to take a bath, and..." "How do you do that?" "Do what?" "Love me, so easily. No matter what I say" "It's your arse. I... love your arse. I was born gay, just to be with your arse. I'm not giving that arse up to anyone" Eren sighed at him, nuzzling and kissing his hair as Eren's hand found his "Why am I bonded to you?" "Because you love me" "Oh... I forgot about that" "Shitty brat. Eren, thank you. For trusting me enough to tell me" "It seems like I'm pretty much stuck with you, not matter what I do" "You're only just working that out?" "I didn't go to school, remember?" "As long as it's not my fault that it's taken this long to realise that" "No... No. You... You're my strength, Lee. Coming home to you, that's the only thing that kept me going. I love you" "I love you, and I think this is getting too mushy for a shopping trip" "You're probably right. I never really realised how small baby clothes actually are" "It'd be a bit weird if you just gave birth to a full grown adult" "Don't go giving him ideas... I'm already scared about the labour" "You'll be fine. I'll be with you" "Yeah... as long as he doesn't get ideas about coming too soon" "Don't go jinxing it" "I'm not. You're the one giving him ideas" "I can't help it. I never thought I'd be a father. I never even thought I'd find a mate, or have a family. This is all your fault" "My fault? I'm pretty sure you said you were born gay to be with my arse" "It doesn't sound romantic when you say it" "It's not romantic at all. At least, not to anyone butt me" "Did you just...?" "Maybe. What are you going to do about it?" "Just you wait until we get home. I'll be happy to show you just how much I love that arse of yours" "Fuck. I'm slick as it is..." "All the more reason we should grab what we planned and get home. You've turned me into a horny old man, who can barely keep it in my pants" Eren paused as he moved to step towards the shopping trolley "Do you... do you really find me that attractive? I... kind of just... feel fat" "I found you beautiful before you even fell pregnant, and I can honestly say I find you just as beautiful now" "Even though I look like this?" "There is nothing wrong with the way you look. And if anyone dares say otherwise, I will bash the ever living shit out of them" "Really?" "I promise" "Then I suppose we should get you home" * Their playful banter had helped distract Eren from his guilt. His omega had perked up when they'd moved towards furniture, only to deflate again until Levi started teasing him again. He'd never thought Eren would be subjected to the harsh reality of those who used and abused omegas. Not after Zeke's death. Knowing the cause of Eren's depression made things much more understandable, while the strength of Eren's trust in him was a little terrifying. With his omega rejecting the pup, and his guilt over carrying, the fact Eren hadn't done something extreme like aborting it, only served to weigh heavily on his mind. Eren kept going through the pregnancy because he knew how much he wanted it. That was all Levi could put it down to. His omega who'd so desperately wanted this child, hadn't thought to get rid of it, because he didn't want to hurt him. Sure, now that his omega had evened out, his moods had improved, but it must have been fucking hard for Eren to keep that inside. He'd probably only confided in Krista... They were lucky to have found such an understanding therapist, and one that Eren could vent to. Returning home from shopping, they headed up to the apartment. The larger items of furniture were being delivered the following day, while the car seat and the majority of the bedding was still in the car. Eren having slowly run out of steam and needing a nap. Lunch leaving his lover seemingly more exhausted than before they'd started eating. Letting Eren in first, his omega made to the sofa before sinking down onto it, automatically going to curl up on it, only to stop before his shoes touched the cushions. Waving his arm at him, Eren groaned "I'm coming" "My feet are too far away. This wouldn't have happened if you'd let me get away with no shoes" "No. You'd be taking a shower if you weren't wearing shoes" "So mean. I don't think you understand fat and swollen feet at all" "Your feet aren't fat" "They feel fat. I feel fat" Draping his waving arm over his face, Eren sighed dramatically "I'm beached" "Hi, beached..." He didn't even get to finish his sentence before Eren was throwing a cushion at him "Please, Levi. Just... help" Closing the apartment door, Levi decided everything down in the car could wait. Placing the bags of Eren's clothes down by the sofa, he squatted down to free his omega of his shoes. Eren moaning the moment his feet were both free "Thank you... I have no idea how full term people walk around or wear high heels" "I honestly don't either. Do you want to nap here? Or in bed?" "Bed. I want cuddles" "Cuddles or sex?" "Cuddles during sex?" Laughing to himself, Levi moved to lift Eren from the sofa "Cuddles during sex?" "I don't know. Why am I so sleepy?" "Because you had a big day" "I don't feel like I did" "You did, and you did good. You told me when you reached your limit" "I feel like my limit isn't good enough" "Eren, trust me. You did good" "I trust you, but I'm still gonna disagree" "I bet if you told Krista, she'd agree" "We are literally about to fuck or snuggle. I don't wanna think about anyone else" Sitting Eren down, Levi helped him out his jacket and dress, then bra. Eren flopped back as if in defeat, lifting his arse to be free from his yoga pants "Eren, how would you feel about topping?" "Topping what? Like ice cream topping?" "Me" "Levi. My brain is like... already shut off... I'm sorry. I can't think" Stripping Eren down, Levi was far less careful when it came to his own clothes. Slick had soaked his boyfriend pad and underwear, leaving them almost sodden. Something that should have revolted, and once would have. Now it just had him itching to mount his mate. Propping himself up, Eren smiled at him "You're so fucking sexy" "Says the guy oozing slick" "Mmm, but that's your fault. And I notice you left my bra on. Do you love my breasts that much?" "You have no idea what I want to do to them" "Oh, is that right? Maybe you show me" "I thought you were sleepy" "There's no way I can sleep after looking at your dick" How could Eren possibly be so shy about masturbating, then sprout something like that? "Is that so?" "It'd just be cruel to make you sleep like that" Pushing himself up to sitting, Eren pulled him closer. His dick brushing over his omega's breasts "Fuck, brat..." "You could take the bra off?" "Mmm. I could, but then what would I do with your breasts?" "I don't know... but I think I want to" "I have an idea, but I want you to know I'll stop if you don't like it, or it feels uncomfortable" "I want to try more with you..." "Eren. I need to hear you say it" It was probably pathetic, but every time they tried something knew, or if Eren didn't initiate it, he still wanted to hear that it was really ok. Eren hadn't had a full blown panic attack from sex since falling pregnant, but he had had a few moments when Levi had needed to step back and let his omega calm back down, even if Eren hadn't noticed them "Levi, if it's too uncomfortable, it'll tell you" "Thank you" Freed from his bra, Levi now had a firm hold of Eren's breasts, pushing them together as he massaged them firmly. Moaning, Eren's legs were spread wide as Levi slowly rocked up against his boyfriend. His erection was trapped between the soft warm flesh of Eren's developing chest, with each trust making Eren mew. He hadn't been sure Eren would into this, but the constant stimulation seemed to be driving him wild, as Levi's desire to cum across Eren's face and chest grew. He'd never thought he'd into titty fucking his boyfriend, but it was fucking hot, especially when Eren slid one hand down to start jerking himself off. Building up a constant rhythm, he felt the tell tale feeling, knowing he was going to come all too soon "Eren, can I come?" "My mouth... I want to taste you" "Are you sure?" "Please alpha... let me taste you" Keeping his hand on Eren's right breast, he used his left to guide himself into Eren's eager mouth. His omega immediately hollowing his cheeks and bobbing his head. Shit. Eren's technique had him weak the knees "Eren..." Nodding around his erection, Eren's eyes met his. That was it. He was gone. His orgasm hitting hard enough for left knee to give out. Awkwardly half kneeling on the bed, he pulled out Eren's mouth as his mate started to choke, coming down Eren's lips and chest, as his lover's come hit his leg. Panting, Levi's head dropped forward, still coming as he tried to catch his breath. No one but Eren had ever made him come this fucking hard, it was seriously verging on ridiculous and felt like what he imagined a volcano erupting would feel like. For some reason that escaped him, it seemed like he came more now that Eren was pregnant. Almost like he was trying to get him pregnant all over again. Milking the last few drops free, he dropped down onto the bed, next to Eren who looked just as fucked as he was. Looking to his mate, Eren caught his eye before starting to laugh "What?" "That felt... kind of amazing" "You're laughing because it felt good?" "And because you have to help me clean up. I think I'm just going to fall asleep like this" "Give me a minute. I popped half a knot" Rubbing his dick, Eren rolled towards him "I'm so not up for kissing it better" "Says the guy covered in my come, and groping me" "Mmm. I just want to touch you. I want to remember every inch of you" "Oh?" "Mhmm. Especially these 9 inches" Leaning in, Eren's lips still held traces of the cinnamon and sugar from the donut he instead on having for lunch. The slow kiss slowly grew more hungry, Eren moaning into his mouth as he release his hold to climb into Levi's lap. Not wanting to break the kiss, Levi pushed himself up, Eren's stomach big enough to make things uncomfortable for him if he hadn't. Breaking the kiss, Eren whined as Levi started to stiffen beneath him. Rolling his hips, Eren started to ride him slowly, one hand on his stomach to keep his balance. With slick pooling in his lap, Levi let out a growl, his dick demanding to be inside their mate instead of just fucking him between his cheeks. Taking hold of Eren's arse, he lifted him enough to line up, the omega so wet and aroused that he could slowly sink into his heat without causing too much pain. It had probably helped that Eren was also still loose from that morning. Topping from the bottom, he held Eren's hips down as he thrust up, placing Eren's pleasure and comfort above his own. With each thrust, more come would dribble from the omega. Having just come, Levi took his time in reducing Eren into a fevered mess. Loving the way he moaned and mewed so sweetly just for him. As Eren's breathing grew more ragged, he started to clench and ripple, his orgasm close, but knowing another orgasm would leave him boneless, Levi lifted Eren, keeping just the tip buried inside as he flipped them over. Spreading his knees wide, his pace grew hard, the sound of squelching slick and wet skin against wet skin as he rode Eren through his orgasm and into his own, coming with a deep and almost primal snarl. Beneath him, Eren's eyelashes fluttered, Levi's heart stopping for a moment. Worried he'd hurt his mate he reached to cup Eren's cheek, before rubbing a soft circle with the pad of his thumb "Eren? Hey. Eren, can you hear me?" His mate didn't smell pained, nor did he feel pain from their bond. From what he could tell, Eren had passed out as soon as he'd come. He'd expected bonelessness, not outright passing out, though Eren had been exhausted. Climbing onto the bed was awkward, the position he ended up in wasn't exactly the best for collapsing into after sex, but he'd rather not cause any unnecessary discomfort for Eren. Resting his cheek against Eren's swell, he peppered kissed to Eren's stretch mark spotted skin. He knew Eren applied vitamin E cream to each stripe almost religiously, but he loved the marks. He didn't care if Eren's stomach never returned to being perfectly smooth. Pregnancy was changing Eren's body in so may ways, and other than his rank farts, Levi had no problems with it all. When Levi's knot finally deflated, he pulled from Eren. Given the fact his boyfriend had started to snore, he was pretty sure he hadn't hurt him. Retrieving a warm towel from the bathroom, Titan had appeared in his absence. Sitting on Eren's pillow, he scowled at Levi as he started to clean Eren down, as if blaming him for the current lack of cuddles. Making sure his boyfriend was as come free as he could be, Levi them grabbed a fresh pad and pair of underwear for Eren, getting him redressed and settled on his side of their bed. He'd completely forgotten the sheets were still a mess from that morning, so he'd settled Eren on the top sheet as it'd come through relatively clean, then grabbed a few of Eren's other blankets out the wardrobe to cover him with. Chucking Eren's clothes in the wash, he forced himself to shower. He wanted nothing more than to climb into bed with Eren, but his mind niggled at him, reminding him of the shopping waiting in the car. Eren was soundly asleep, and sorely needed it, giving him plenty of time to head down and retrieve everything. * Eren was in a forgiving mood. Actually, he was in the best mood he'd been in since bonding with Levi. Confessing his and his father's sin to his alpha may not have been planned, but it felt like the crushing tightness in his chest had eased. Levi had said it was ok to love his pup and to be happy. That what his father did wasn't his fault. It was completely different hearing it out loud, and from the alpha he loved so deeply. He could have told himself the exact same thing until he was blue in the face and he never would have believed it for himself. Having fallen asleep during sex, he'd woken to Levi cuddles. His alpha reading while playing absentmindedly with his hair. Eren couldn't help the rush of affection he felt every single time he looked to his mate. When he'd realised Levi wasn't going to propose any time soon, saying he was crushed was the understatement of the century, but gradually he settled back down, realising that perhaps Levi was planning something special and needed time to do so. He'd vowed to himself not to say anything, not after subjecting Levi to some of the foulest moods he'd ever experienced. Like seriously, who the fuck just throws a dozen eggs at their partner. It wasn't Levi's fault he didn't remember. His alpha worked his fucking arse so that they could live such a comfortable life. His own inheritance had been delayed due to the ongoing investigation into his father by Floch. Though he may have neglected to mention to Levi that man had called to tell him that. Levi would worry himself sick over it all. His alpha used to claim he was terrible at words, but every single word that came from Levi's lips was with love. Even when he'd had a horrible day at work, and was all broody and scowly, if he accident snapped he'd apologise right away. With the help of Levi, he'd showered and dressed, before his lover settled him down on the sofa in the living room. Levi so insistent on helping, he'd had to shoo him out so he could go to the toilet. Pregnant people peed a lot... like.... a lot. Equal parts impressed and annoyed, he eyed the organised mess spilling of their living area. While he'd been sleeping, Levi had moved all the new things for the pup to his room, and dragged everything out the spare room alone. With the smell of vinegar in the air, he could tell his alpha would have scrubbed the spare room from top to bottom already. Levi had once explained that vinegar kills mould, while bleach only serves to bleach it. Maybe it was the expectant mum in him, but the idea of the nursery stinking of bleach made his stomach roll. He wanted to be able to work in there, without worrying about the smell sending him scrambling for the toilet. Passing him his phone, Levi ruffed his hair on his way pass to the kitchen. Opening his Facebook up, he found himself doing something he never thought he would. First unblocking Armin, then adding him and the woman called Mikasa on his friends list. His father had told him how close they'd been, and with Levi's words of how he wasn't his father's sin or whatever it was, echoing in his mind. He sent them both friend requests, before placing his phone down and snatching up the TV remote. He'd expected to maybe feel some slight nerves, but he was just too happy to. When Levi joined him on the sofa, Eren sank into his warmth. He might be a horny shit, but cuddles felt even better. His alpha scent of warm free tea with the lingering touches of his body was had his omega internally purring. Starting to nibble at the sandwich Levi had made, his stomach rolled before rumbling "I'm not surprised you're staving" "I honestly feel like I haven't eaten in years" "That's because yesterday all you had was a glass of milk and lunch" "Yesterday?" "It's about 2 am. You slept for a solid 12 hours" "I don't feel like I have. Why didn't you wake me?" "Because making a baby takes a lot of energy. You needed the rest, especially when you didn't seem to have any nightmares" "I can't remember dreaming... I can't believe I fell asleep during sex" "You managed to scare the fuck out of me. I had a feeling you'd be tired, not that you'd pass out and start snoring" Eren's face dusted red with embarrassment, whining as it did. Levi was supposed to be nice to him! "Don't worry. I'm not mad" "I am. I didn't get my after sex cuddles" "No, but you're having cuddles now. You're not too sore, are you?" "No... my hips are, and my back, and feet, and my shoulders, and I feel bloated... I think I just want cuddles instead of sex" "I was thinking we could sort the boxes?" The things Levi decided to keep were going to be stored at Hanji's house, seeing she owned her own home, and had the space in her garage for them. Erwin had offered to help, but Levi had shot him down "Mmm. Ok. Let me sit up, and where's Titan?" "He was in your room. He wasn't happy I stripped our bed down" "Titan!" "You're supposed to be eating" "I'm still eating. I'm just worried about my fur baby" There was the soft but solid thud of Titan's paws as he came running, leaping up to settle on the sofa, then immediately trying to get to Eren's sandwich "You should have left him sleeping" "But then I couldn't have shared with him" "You're not sharing with him" Titan meowed at him, one large paw coming up to hover just short of Eren's plate. His big eyes stared up at him, silently begging "Leeevi. How am I supposed to say no now?" "I'll give him a tin of cat food. Just finish your sandwich" Titan was a cat who's love was easy to buy. The moment Levi cracked the top of the tin of cat food, the tom was racing off to the kitchen. Finishing his sandwich, Eren placed the plate down with a pout. He wanted Titan cuddles, and Levi cuddles. Now his boyfriend was hefting a box up onto the coffee table and Titan was too busy eating "I think this box is mostly clothes" He knew he said he'd be there for Levi as he did this, but now he was getting nervous. He was terrible at comforting Levi and making him feel better. He never knew if he was saying the right things or making it all a hundred times worse. Tipping the box onto its side, Levi joined him back on the sofa. Pulling off the tap over the top as it did and sending a whole bunch of things cascading onto the floor "Yeah... clothes..." All of Isabel and Farlan's clothes seemed to have been second hand. Isabel had tried to patch them the best she could. Digging to the bottom, Levi wrinkled his nose in clear disgust "There's nothing worth saving in here" "Are you sure?" "Don't get too close, the bottom layers are mouldy" "Can't you just wash them?" "Mould stains. Even if I did, it wouldn't be worth it. I should have gone through these sooner" His boyfriend sounded bitter, Eren whining softly as he placed his hand on his arm "I'm sorry" "No. No, it's my fault. I don't even know how the mould got in. Something must have been wet. It's my fault" "It's not your fault..." Levi huffed, brushing him off as he rose and moved the box next to the door. The next four boxes were mostly clothes, but they were used to wrap more interesting things. Small photo frames, tea cups, plates, glass figures and chipped Christmas ornaments were carefully unwrapped. Eren couldn't help himself as he collected each photo frame carefully. Levi sighing heavily as he leaned over to explain where they were in each of them. Seeing Isabel's bright smile and Farlan's faked scowl, his heart ached. Levi looked so young and happy with them. Like... genuinely happy. The smile on his lips completely unguarded, not a single wrinkle of grey hair to be seen... He knew his boyfriend was drop dead sexy, but fuck... He fell in love with him all over again, and desperately wished there'd been a way to meet Levi back then. The frames were carefully put aside. The mould had gotten in between the photo and glass in some of them, but apparently there was a way to get them restored. Levi wanted to bin the ornaments and figured, but Eren wasn't having it. Carefully saving them for storage at Hanji's, and the three badly hand painted baubles with Levi's, Isabel's and Farlan's name on them. They were definitely going on the tree this year. It The way Levi joked about how much Isabel loved the "shitty things" was all he needed to know. Levi wasn't quite ready to get rid of them, even if he said so. It didn't matter to him if once they were in storage never they saw them again, as long as they were safe for a day when Levi might want to. The box that really broke Levi was Isabel's books. Like everything else, it may have been second hand, but her books. They were something special. Crammed full of notes and slips of paper, the woman's passion clear. Levi's scent turned troubled, emotional pain infecting him through their bond "Levi" The book in Levi's hands started to shake due to his alpha starting to tremble "I bought her this book. Actually, I stole it for her. She'd worked so hard to save for it, but Farlan needed a fucking doctor and medication... Before you give me that look, we were back in high school. This was her first new book on birds. She'd stared at it for hours... and it wasn't like I didn't have the money. You do what you need to, you know. But they took one look at me and refused to serve me. I had the fucking money in my hand, but... they weren't having it. With Farlan being sick, it was the last straw. I waited until the clerk was busy, then I bolted. It was fucking worth it though. She was so happy. She read it over and over... Even at college, with all the new big and better books she could use, she still carried this one. Farlan would joke she loved her book more than him" Levi let out a shaky breath, running his fingers through his hair "Fuck. Sorry. I need a drink" "I'll get you one..." They still had a couple of boxes left to go through... but with how distressed Levi seemed to be, he wanted to do everything he could to calm his alpha and be there for him "No. It's ok. You stay here" Patting him on the knee, Levi took the book with him. The alpha first disappearing into their bedroom, then to the kitchen. Sitting back on the sofa, Levi had apparently drained his drink in the kitchen. His alpha looking at the neat pile of books with pained eyes. Climbing into Levi's lap, he wrapped his arms around his alpha. Nuzzling into his hair, in the hope of providing comfort "Eren... just... not now" Pushing him off, Eren was confused. He was only trying to make Levi feel better. He wasn't kissing him, or trying anything sexual. He simply wanted to comfort Levi. His omega was just as confused. Their mate was sad. He didn't like his mate being sad "I just wanted to hug you" "I think I want to finish this alone. Why don't you go to bed?" He wasn't tired... and he thought Levi wanted to do this together? Besides, barely talked about Farlan... he wanted to hear more about him "I don't mind..." "Sorry, Eren. I want to do this alone" "I..." "Go to bed..." He was trying to tell Levi he loved him, and if he changed his mind to just let him know... and now he being sent to bed like a kid. He knew it wasn't easy for Levi to talk to about Isabel and Farlan, but he'd opened up to him about his father... and about Zeke, and his mum. So why didn't Levi want to tell him anything? Didn't his alpha trust him? Eren didn't sleep well that night. He'd returned to their room, only to find he needed to pee. He didn't want to upset Levi by walking around the apartment, so tried to sleep it off. It didn't work. Creeping from their bedroom to the bathroom, he was just as "ninja" as he crept back. The bottle of scotch had made it from the kitchen to the coffee table, while Levi was patting Titan. The cat purring with his usual rumble. So Levi didn't mind Titan making a fuss over him... as long as it wasn't his pregnant mate. Feeling pathetically jealous of Titan, Eren returned to their bed. Levi hadn't even remade it... getting fresh sheets would mean leaving the room again, and he didn't want to do that. All he could do was grab one of his blankets from Levi's wardrobe and make sure he was completely covered by it. The cold plastic of the mattress protector sticking uncomfortable to his skin when he slipped his hand under his pillowcase free pillow.. which was covered with a gross feeling fabric protector. He was cold and uncomfortable, the pup spinning flips from the feel of it. Closing his eyes, it was hard not to feel like he didn't even belong in their apartment. Still just as cold as when he'd gone to bed, Eren crept out when things went silent. He'd managed to doze off at some point, waking up, Levi had been swearing. He'd been tempted to go help him, but several loud thuds followed, then some of the more colourful language he'd ever heard. Scared by his mate, he'd sunk from their bed to the floor, curling up in the corner of the room as he'd tried to hide under his blanket. Emerging to find the living room cleaned, Levi was passed out on the sofa with Titan on his chest. The bottle of scotch was empty, the lone item left out from the night before. Even the boxes to go down to the dumpsters were gone. Hurt over the fact Levi hadn't even bothered coming to bed, he'd been tempted to leave him sleeping without blanket. The apartment was fucking freezing, his toes growing numb... Fuck. He couldn't just leave Levi like this. Retrieving the blanket he'd used, he draped it over Levi and Titan, Titan giving him a glare, but not bothering to move. If Levi could go ahead and do things for the nursery without him, that must mean it's ok for him to do the same? After all, the nursery was the whole reason Levi was home. It sure as hell wasn't to spend time with him... No. No. He wasn't going to do this. Levi hadn't really done anything wrong. He'd just needed space to process everything. It wasn't like his alpha didn't give him all the space he needed... and then some... Dragging all the shopping from his room and into the nursery, that was the end of his will power. He didn't want to do any of this alone. He couldn't do anything anyway, they didn't have the furniture yet. He didn't know what to do. He didn't want to go back to Levi's room and sleeping alone held no appeal... Things without Levi were boring... Wandering back to Levi, Titan had abandoned him. Levi had turned to his side, his leg hanging off the side of the sofa in a way that looked highly uncomfortable. His stomach might be slightly bigger than the photos on google, but he was sure he could lift Levi. He didn't want to leave him on the sofa. Dragging the coffee table back enough to make space, Levi was too out of it to know. His alpha even stank of scotch... lifting Levi, his alpha groaned at him "Let me sleep" "Shut up, or I'll drop you" Scowling up at him, he'd woken Levi... but he'd come too far to back out. He'd managed to even get him completely off the sofa... Fuck... Levi better appreciate this "Just put me down" "Not an option right now. You're going to bed you drunk" "Eren..." "Shut up. I'm mad at you. You didn't even make the bed. Do you know fucking cold it is?" "You're freezing" "And you're doing that things where you're talking and I don't want you to" Levi let a giggle. An actual fucking giggle. He wished he'd recorded, because there was no way anyone ever believe he had. Dumping him down on his bed, his boyfriend flipped him off before crawling under the covers and patting the space beside him "Get down here brat..." Climbing under the covers, Levi rolled and clung to him. Pulling him flush and nuzzling into his nape "Mmm. 'm sorry. I'm a jerk" "You are. You left me freezing" "Fuck..." Placing his cold hand on Eren's stomach, Eren gasped as he tried to escape, Levi's hold making it impossible "You arsehole" "Don't leave me. I don't want to be alone, again" The playfullyness of Levi's drunken state was gone, his alpha sounding so fucking lonely that Eren forgot he'd been trying to escape "I'm not leaving you" "Don't want to lose you, brat..." "You won't. I love you" Levi huffed, Eren copping a blast of scotch breath. He'd thought his alpha was going to say something else... only, Levi started to purr instead. Eren had no idea that alpha's could even purr. Fuck. He needed his phone. Not only a giggle but a purr... he needed Levi to get drunk more often.

Chapter 16: Not What You Want for Your Birthday

Fic Summary: “Everyone had a link with their soulmates, some could hear some of their partners thoughts, some had a tattoo that would appear with their partners name; for me, I knew when they got sick.” For a while Phil has thought that his soulmate might have an eating disorder and doesn’t expect to meet him in the restaurant where he works.

Genre: a lot of fluff, recovery, really fucking domestic, waiter!Phil

Warnings: eating disorders, anorexia, bulimia, hospitals, panic attacks, references to past abuse, mentions of suicide, a lot of awkwardness, small amounts of smut. This is potentially triggering so for your own sake, please think twice about reading if anything this might affect you.

Disclaimer: I don’t have personal experience with eating disorders, but have done some research. If I have anything about them wrong, feel free to send me an ask and I’ll sort it out.

Word Count (for this part): 6.8k

[Uploads will be approximately every couple of weeks! (hopefully)]

A/N: Announcement - I have a new  sideblog, @philsdrill-updates, where I will post only about updates for this fic, so if you want a notification when I update, you can turn on notifications for the blog if you want! Also, next chapter should be sooner rather than later, as I’ve actually written it. This was going to be 11k, but I’ve decided to split it in two (thanks to those who helped me decide). Anyway, enjoy!

MASTERPOST

<= Previous Chapter

When the morning arrived, we found another thing for the day’s to-do list. As well as constructing our bed and phoning Dan’s parents, we would also have to go shopping. We’d had no milk for days, and now we were out of bread too. We were almost at the stage of having ice cream for breakfast, but not quite.

We made a trip to Tesco, something that I think Dan and I had only done together once. Usually we used the online ordering system, from the days when the amount of food in the supermarket would be too much for him to cope with. Today, he was feeling up to it, and it would be easier for us to get all of the things we needed without forgetting something.

As we made our way around the shop, I thought about what we would eat for lunch. For days we had been eating the odds and ends we had left in the fridge and freezer, but now we had the opportunity to eat something decent. I’d missed cooking over the last few days, and was excited to get back into the habit of it. I picked up some chicken breasts from the meat aisle, with the intention of coating them, frying them and then using it as a sandwich filler. It would make a change from pre-packaged ham.

We picked up most of the things from our usual weekly shop, and it was just after I had found the KitKats that I noticed Dan spacing out a little.

“You okay?” I asked him, bringing the trolley to a stop next to the Doritos and studying his expression.

“Yeah, this is just a little overwhelming,” he told me, “Too many sweets, too many kinds of potatoes… just…”

“Okay,” I said calmly, “I just need to pick up some new socks and then we can leave.”

I rested one hand on the small of Dan’s back and started to control the trolley with one hand. The excuse of me needing new socks was really just to get him out of the aisles full of food, but now that I thought about it, I realised that I seemed to have lost a number of them recently.

I brought the trolley to a stop in front of the display of socks and picked out a couple of pairs. Dan seemed to be a bit more focused on the world now, so I could tell he was okay, but I thought we should go home. He didn’t seem like he was about to have a panic attack or anything, but then, we never knew.

“Okay, that’s us,” I said, “Anything you’re needing or shall we go to the checkout?”

“I’m good,” Dan said, and started to wander in the direction of the checkouts.

I went ahead of him with the trolley, picked the checkout with the shortest queue, and started to unload the stuff onto the conveyor belt. Dan did help, but he had clearly given me the leading role. I felt a bit like a Dad in the situation, where I was the one speaking to the cashier and loading most of the bags, while Dan was the kid who helped out a little, but mainly stood quietly by the trolley.

However, in Dan helping to pack the bags, there were moments when I was by the trolley and Dan was next to the cashier. She was a lovely lady, who made pleasant small talk and  would slow down to let us keep up. As the last few items came through, I was lifting another full bag into the trolley.

“Do you need another bag?” the lady asked Dan.

When Dan didn’t reply, I looked up from the trolley. Dan seemed to be staring into space and the cashier looked over at him, puzzledly.

“Yes please,” I replied, coming over to stand next to Dan.

I nudged his arm gently to bring him back to earth, while I filled the last bag. Dan noticed my nudge, looked a bit dazed, and then wandered back towards the trolley. I passed him the last bag to put in it, and then got my card out to pay.

“Is your friend okay?” the cashier asked me quietly, “He seems a little out if it.”

“He has anxiety,” I told her, not really knowing what else to say, “I think he just needs to get out of here.”

“Okay,” she nodded, not showing any understanding but smiling and passing me my receipt and vouchers, “On you go.”

I pushed the trolley to the car, with Dan lingering by my side. He wasn’t saying a lot, but then he could be quite a quiet person by nature. I brought the trolley to a stop behind my car, unlocked it, and opened up the boot.

“Can I go and sit in the car while you load it?” Dan asked, his voice sounding a little nervous.

“Yeah sure,” I told Dan, knowing that something wasn’t quite right, but not wanting to ask him in this open environment.

I quickly filled up the boot and parked the trolley, and before long I was climbing into the driver’s seat, next to Dan.

“What’s wrong?” I asked him, once I had the door shut.

“Nothing, I just… there was a moment where I just got freaked out by the amount of food and I’m fine now, I just needed out of there,” he said, stumbling over his words a little.

“Okay,” I nodded, reaching over and taking his hand, which was trembling a little, “Do you want a drink of water or anything?”

“Did we buy some?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I said, stretching behind me into the backseat, where I had put one of the six-packs of bottled water.

I brought the packet forwards, opened it and passed Dan a bottle. I put the rest of them back behind me, and looked at Dan, who was taking small sips of the water, but looking relatively calm. I made sure he was good to go, before starting the car and heading back towards home.

–

After putting the shopping away, we started on constructing our bed.  It was relatively simple, but due to its size, it took quite a while. We stopped for our fried chicken sandwiches at lunchtime, and I was grateful for the relaxing break that cooking gave me. We finished the bed after lunch, at about three o’clock.

We both lay down on the now completed bed and had a discussion about our plan for later, with our meal out. We decided on exactly which restaurant we were going to, and I called to book a table. I maybe should’ve booked a little earlier in the day, as we had to go for a time that was a little later than ideal; it just meant that I wouldn’t have time to come home before heading to the restaurant where I worked.

Dan and I were both tired, and we could fit in a little nap before going out, but we had one last thing to do first. Call Dan’s parents and see when Adam could come up.

We sat on the bed, with Dan’s phone between us. He made the call and put the phone on speaker so we could both communicate.

After the initial ‘hello’s and ‘how are you’s, we got down to the question, “Now that we’ve moved house and have a spare room, we were thinking we could have Adam up to stay for a few days. We thought it would be good for him and he seemed to like the idea when we spoke a few days ago. When would be good?”

Dan’s parents discussed for a minute or two, and I even heard Adam’s voice in the background. Shouldn’t he be in school? I guess things weren’t too good for him at the moment.

“Would Monday be too soon?” Dan’s mum asked us, “He could come then and stay for the week? It’s the mid-term this coming weekend so he’ll be off Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Monday anyway, and I think realistically he won’t be in school this Monday or Tuesday.”

Dan and I looked at each other and began to nod slowly, both of us agreeing that that was fine.

“That’s fine,” Dan told them, cheerily, “We’ll get the place organised for then. Give us details of his train when you have them.”

We spoke about a few more technical aspects to his visit, but soon we were ending the call with a promise to speak soon.

Dan let out a sigh of relief, “I’m glad that’s organised.”

I set an alarm on Dan’s phone, then we both lay down for a nap. We’d had a long morning, and we were going to need our energy for later. After our meal, I had work, and we were hoping that we’d have the energy for a little intimate time when I got home. Things had been stressful of late and we both needed the release.

–

Dan’s POV:

When we awoke from our nap, Phil and I agreed to take separate showers, knowing we were both lowkey too horny to be in such a steamy environment together. We took a bathroom each, and each got ourselves ready for our date.

It was strange to think, that after being together for all these months, this was our first time going out to a restaurant together. I was a little bit nervous, but I knew I would be fine with Phil by my side.

We arrived at the restaurant, and were very quickly taken to our table. Phil made small talk with the waiter, and even managed to tell the waiter that he was a waiter himself.

After gandering over the menu for a while, Phil and I decided on what we were going to order. We’d share a starter of garlic bread with mozzarella, each have our own main course: creamy Spaghetti Carbonara for Phil and tomatoey Spaghetti al Forno for myself. Neither of us could drink, with me driving and Phil working, so we each ordered a soft drink; Phil went for a bottle of Coke, while I just asked for some tap water. We wouldn’t have to commit to having pudding until later, which was perfectly fine by me.

The garlic bread was nice, but I restricted myself to one piece and let Phil have the other two. I wanted to be able to eat most of my main course. I’d ordered the smaller ‘Starter Portion’, but I still had a feeling that I was going to struggle.

Phil and I had made the agreement not to talk about anything stressful over dinner. The subjects of house moving, anxiety, illness and my brother’s soulmate issues were all off the cards, unless of course something came up and we had to speak about them.

We spoke about more simple matters, light-hearted conversation that seemed perfect for a date, without making things too serious.

We briefly discussed the weekend, and how the plan was to go to Phil’s parents house on Saturday, have our evening meal, then stay over into Sunday. I again asked Phil if he knew what we’d be eating, but he wasn’t able to tell me much more than the last time.

“My mum says it’s a surprise,” Phil told me, “But she says she kept you in mind, when deciding on it. She won’t tell me, but if you want to speak to her on the phone, she might tell you.”

“I might do that,” I told him, “It’s not that I don’t trust her, I’d just rather know.”

When had finished our main courses, and the dessert menu came around, I made the decision to stop where I was. There was only so much food by body could handle, and I felt I was already a bit too close to that limit. However, I persuaded Phil that he should order a pudding, that I shouldn’t hold him back from having something that he loved.

When Phil’s ice cream sundae arrived, he asked the waiter if we could have a second spoon. I could see Phil was going to offer me a little bit, and I felt that I could accept his offer as long as it wasn’t too much. Phil did offer me some ice cream, and while I didn’t have a lot,  I did enjoy my little sample.

We finished the meal off with a coffee, or rather a latte for Phil and a hot chocolate for myself. I wasn’t going to risk having any coffee induced anxiety to put a downer on our night, I’d have to make do with the energy from our nap.

Phil paid the bill, giving the waiter a tip, and we made our way out of the restaurant, feeling satisfied and full of food. There was a slight anxious feeling in the back of my mind, but I knew what I’d eaten wasn’t particularly unhealthy, and that I was allowed to treat myself from time to time.

Having a little time to spare before Phil’s work, we took a walk around a nearby park together to get some fresh air, a pleasant thing to do after being in warm restaurant full of food smells. Although a little cold, it was peaceful, and just what I needed to ease my mind. Phil and I held hands as we strolled around, and may have partaken in the cheesy romantic fantasy of kissing against a tree next to a stream.

As I drove Phil to his work, I reminded myself that our night wasn’t over yet. We’d have more time together when Phil came home, and we’d made an agreement about what we’d be doing. Obviously, if something changed and one of us was too tired, we’d put it off until the morning, but everything was looking good; Phil and I were well rested and we were looking forward to later on. I could certainly feel the lust in my veins, recently having found myself aroused by the smallest things.

I dropped Phil off at his restaurant, pressing another kiss to his cheek before he got out of the car. I told him I loved him, and reminded that I’d see him in a few hours, when I came to pick him up.

I drove Phil’s car back to our flat, and parked it in our assigned space. I made my way up to the second floor alone and let myself into our flat. I occupied myself with a bit of unpacking and tidying for a while, but I was distracted. I knew what Phil and I were planning when he came back, and I wanted to do a little preparation.

It had been a while since Phil and I did anything in that department, and I knew I would be way too tight to stretch quickly. To make things easier for both of us later on, I was going to get myself prepped a little in advance. After a bit of searching through boxes to find what I was looking for, I eventually made my way to Phil and I’s bedroom, armed with a dildo, some lube and a towel I didn’t mind getting a little messy.

I started with my fingers, coating them liberally in the slippery substance and slowly pushing in and apart. It was a very slow process, as I’d predicted, and it took a while before I found myself feeling comfortable enough to take something bigger. I was humming and hawing about using the dildo, knowing that I did risk getting carried away when I wanted to save myself for later. Eventually I decided that I would go for it, let myself adjust to the stretch, then take it out and leave things there.

I lowered myself onto it, biting my lip as the stretch was a little more than I’d expected. Eventually I bottomed out, and all I wanted to do was start fucking myself on it, but I mustered all my self control and kept still, saving myself for Phil. Another wave of arousal struck me, and I knew I had to take it out and distance myself from the idea. I slowly pulled the toy back out, and lay it to the side on the towel. I took a few deep breaths and stood up from the bed to retrieve my underwear.

I’d just pulled my boxers back up when suddenly my head felt a little fuzzy. I suddenly felt really really anxious and I didn’t know why.

I sank to the floor; I think I may have forgotten how to stand as my mind was elsewhere. After talking a few deep breaths and focusing on what was going on in my head, I realised that I was worrying about Phil.

Was Phil sick?

Phil never got sick though; I hadn’t felt anything through our bond since I was about eight. The more I tried to recall that time, I started to realise that this was how it felt.

So was Phil sick?

I guess we’d never quite got to the bottom of him feeling ill before we moved; maybe it was connected.

Suddenly I realised there was only really one way to figure out if he was okay. I got up, grabbed my phone from the bedside table and called Phil.

As the phone rang, I pulled my t-shirt back on, knowing that I may have to go and pick Phil up if this was what I thought. I froze and paid my utmost attention to the phone when I heard Phil pick up.

“Dan?” Phil answered, his voice sounding rough and a little shaky, almost immediately confirming my suspicions.

“Phil, I felt it; you’ve been sick, right?” I asked.

“Yeah,” Phil said, his voice trembling and catching in his throat, “I wasn’t feeling good so Chris is taking care of my tables and I came back to the break room and now -”

Phil paused, and over the phone I heard a bit of what sounded like him throwing up. He let out a pained moan and sighed.

“I’m getting ready to come and pick you up,” I told Phil, putting the phone on speaker and putting on a pair of joggies and some shoes.

“T-thanks,” Phil responded, but sounding like he was on the verge of tears.

“Try and keep yourself together for me,” I told him, “Should I bring a bucket?”

A hesitant ‘maybe’ from Phil was all I needed to know that the answer was yes. I kept him on the line so I could hear how he was doing, grabbed the bucket and my keys and made my way down to the car.

I had to end the call to drive there, but I told Phil I’d be there in five minutes. He choked out something about me finding either Chris or his manager and one of them would take me to him.

I made my way to the restaurant as fast as I safely and legally could. I was worried about Phil, and needed to be by his side as quickly as possible. I got hit by a particularly strong wave of worry after turning into the main road, and found myself struggling to pay attention to the road.

I didn’t really want to, but I pulled over to let it pass, knowing that if I kept going, I would be in a lot of danger. I took a couple of deep breaths, feeling a little nauseous myself. It hurt to know that Phil was struggling so much and I couldn’t be there with him.

Once I felt a little calmer, I started the car back up and continued on my way. I felt some relief come over me as I turned into the restaurant car park, knowing that Phil wasn’t far away now.

I pulled into the disabled space right next to the building, because fuck it, Phil was really sick and wouldn’t be up for walking very far.

I leapt out of the car, locked it and headed towards the door, not caring about my horrendously untidy parking. I doubted I’d be here long enough for anyone to complain.

Heading into the restaurant, I spotted Phil’s boss standing by the 'please wait here to be seated’ sign. I made my way over to him, ready with my question about Phil. He was probably ready for me to enquire about getting a table, but I was about to throw him off his routine.

“Hi, I’m Dan, Phil’s soulmate,” I introduced myself, “Could you take me to him?”

“Yeah, Chris told me he wasn’t feeling too good, so he’s back in the breakroom,” he said, gesturing for me to follow him, “Did he call you?”

“No I called him,” I told him, “I felt it through our bond.”

“From what I heard from Phil, I thought it was just when the other threw up, not just…” he paused, “Oh wait, has he thrown up?”

“Yeah,” I nodded, “And more than once. I’m guessing you’ve got a toilet back there?”

“Yeah we do,” he said, looking a little perplexed, “Do you know what’s wrong? Do you think he’s picked up a stomach bug from somewhere? Sorry to sound arrogant but hygiene is very important here.”

“I’m pretty confident this is connected to him being ill last week, and whatever’s wrong, he’s not contagious because I’m absolutely fine,” I told him, “And I completely understand why you’re asking.”

“Okay good,” he said, looking relieved.

“I’m starting to wonder if it’s a food allergy or something,” I explained, as we walked through a door marked ‘staff only’ at the back of the restaurant, “Because he seems to feel ill sometimes after he’s eaten, but he’s been fine for a couple of days. I’m going to take him to the doctor, probably tomorrow unless he’s really bad.”

“Could you find someone else to take his shift tomorrow?” I asked him, “I somehow don’t think he’ll be up for it.”

“Yeah, sure,” Phil’s boss replied, “I’ll get someone organised, can’t have him working like this.”

He pushed open a door, which lead into what was clearly the staff breakroom and cloakroom area. There were coat hooks, lockers, and a number of tables and chairs. At one side of the room, there were two doors labelled as toilets.

I followed the manager across to the door with a mens’ symbol on it. The door creaked open as he pushed it, and he called out Phil’s name, “Phil?”

A rough sounding ‘yeah?’ came from the end cubicle, and I heard Phil shuffling around a little.

“Dan’s here,” he said, “I’d better get back to the front desk, so I’ll leave you two to it. I hope you feel better soon.”

The boss left, and I wandered over to just outside of the toilet door.

“Phil?” I asked timidly, “Do you want to let me in?”

“Yeah, just give me a minute,” Phil replied.

I heard the toilet roll spin round and rip a couple of times, then the toilet flush. Phil then opened the door, whilst still sitting on the floor. I entered the cubicle and crouched down next to him. He was resting his head on the wall next to the toilet, and he looked incredibly pale.

“You’ve been sick, what, three times?” I asked him.

Phil nodded, “I still feel like I’m going to throw up again though.”

I gently rested my hand on Phil’s back, “You can have as long here as you need, but I’ve got a bucket in the car so we can get you home when you’re ready.”

“S-stay a bit longer,” Phil stammered.

“Sure thing,” I said, slowly rubbing my hand up and down his back.

“I think I either ate something bad or something didn’t agree with me,” Phil groaned, rubbing his stomach.

“Yeah,” I nodded, “It might not be, but I think this could be connected to how you felt before we moved. Like I think there’s something you’re eating that you’re maybe allergic to or something.”

“You think?” Phil asked, “But what? I tried not eating some things but it didn’t make a difference.”

“I think we should take you to the Doctor tomorrow and see if we can get the answer to that,” I told him, “But for now I think we should get you home to your own toilet and bed.”

“Yeah,” Phil nodded miserably.

“You want to get up and go then?” I asked him, “D'you think you’ll be able to keep the rest of the contents of your stomach in there until we get outside?”

“Hopefully,” Phil told me, “But can I get a hand up?”

I got up, then helped Phil to his feet. I brought my arms firmly around his waist to steady him, and we walked out into the sink area.

Phil wearily washed his hands, and I splashed some water onto his face, wiping some residue from his chin. After I’d washed and dried my hands, he returned to my side like a lost puppy, tired and barely able to stand on his own.

“You good to go?” I asked Phil, bringing my arm around his shoulders.

“I guess,” he said, “Can we go out the back door though? I don’t want to walk through the restaurant, feeling like this.”

“Sure,” I nodded, “You’ll need to show me the way though.”

Phil and I turned towards the back of the restaurant as we came out the room. We passed a number of doors, one of which was open and led into the kitchen. We hurried past this one as the food smells were a bit much, making Phil retch and clamp a hand over his mouth.

Phil pushed open the back door and hurried outside, bending over next to the wall and holding his stomach and his throat. Despite looking like he was about to, Phil didn’t throw up, and managed to take a few deep breaths and stand up straight again.

I helped Phil over to the car, which was fortunately just about as close as it could be. I opened the passenger door for him and let him get in, before handing him the bucket I’d brought.

“Let’s hope you don’t need that,” I said to him, “But it saves your car getting messy if you do.”

I went around the car and got back into the driver’s seat. I started the car, and started back home. Phil was next to me, clutching the bucket for dear life, looking very uncomfortable. There were a couple of speed bumps on the road into our apartments, which I hadn’t particularly taken any note of before now. I drove carefully over both, but the second one was too much for Phil, resulting in him making use of the bucket after all.

I kept going, pulling into our parking space less than a minute later, where I was finally able to comfort Phil. He wasn’t coping too well, choking out tears and strangled words.

“I feel so ill,” he cried, “Make it stop. I feel sick going over speed bumps at the best of times, but I just…”

“Phil, it’s okay,” I told him, trying to comfort him as he was panicking, “You’re going to be okay. Let’s go upstairs and get you some medicine and some water. We’ll go to the doctors tomorrow. Tonight probably won’t be great, but we’ll get to the bottom of this soon.”

Phil nodded, wiping tears away from his eyes and sniffling a little. I got out of the car and headed round to the other side to help him out. It was scary how my usually strong and happy Phil, was now trembling and in tears. I wish this didn’t have to happen to him. This time it was me helping him up the stairs to our flat, him being the weak one in the situation, the one who needed the support of his soulmate to lean on.

I helped the shaking Phil out of his work clothes and into some pyjamas; my first priority was getting him comfortable, so he didn’t have to get up again in five minutes. I got him to sit down in bed with his bucket while I fetched some medicine. I had to hastily move my things from earlier out of the way, but not without Phil noticing.

“Oh god, you were getting all prepared and everything, I’m sorry,” Phil blurted.

“Yeah, I was,” I admitted, “Don’t worry about it though. You’re ill; I can wait.”

I found the tablets that Phil had sneakily got from the pharmacy, and a bottle of water. I brought them to him, and sat by his side as he took them.

“Hopefully, those will help you feel better,” I said, putting an arm around him and getting ready to stay with him for a while.

His symptoms didn’t seem to be easing much after half an hour, and I made the decision to get him some paracetamol to try and ease the pain. He had adopted a variety of different positions over the last thirty minutes, and his current one was laying on his side, with his arms wrapped around his stomach, a look of intense discomfort on his face.

After Phil took the paracetamol,a thought struck me. Would some food disagreeing with him really put him in this much pain? Could it be something more serious like appendicitis? Or a stomach ulcer like I’d had?

Was there a way I could figure out the difference? Should I take him to hospital? It wasn’t something I wanted to have to do, but then, I didn’t really know what to do.

Phil let out another grunt of pain - the paracetamol was yet to kick in - when a thought crossed my mind. Who would’ve dealt with Phil being ill many more times than I had? His mum.

Despite technically being an adult myself, I was still young, and there were still times I needed help from someone older and more experienced with the things life throws at us. I took Phil’s phone from his bedside table, and informed him that I was going to call his mum. He tried to protest at that, but he didn’t really have the energy to utter anything more than a simple 'no’.

“Hi Phil,” Phil’s mum greeted as she picked up the phone.

“It’s Dan,” I told her.

I don’t know if it was something in the tone of my voice, or whether it was because I was calling rather than Phil, but she immediately noticed that something was up.

“Is everything okay?” she asked.

“N-not really,” I stuttered, feeling my own panic rising in my throat, “Phil’s really sick and I’ve given him medicine but he doesn’t really seem better, and I’ve just given him paracetamol because his stomach hurts a lot but I’ve just thought, what if it’s something worse and I don’t know if I should take him to hospital or…”

“Dan,” she said, in a soothing motherly voice that made me feel a little better, “Keep doing what you’re doing, I’ll come over and see. I’ll be there in about ten minutes, okay?”

“Thanks,” I said, feeling a little less panicky now that I knew an adult who could help was on the way.

I hung up the call to Phil’s mum and returned to Phil’s side, “You’re mum’s coming over. I need someone to confirm I’m doing the right things.”

I took some deep breaths to calm myself down, running my hand through Phil’s soft, fluffy hair. He relaxed a little under my touch, so I kept at it, hoping he would start to feel better soon.

When Phil’s mum arrived, I got up to let her in, and spent a couple of minutes explaining the context of the situation: what Phil ate for dinner, how long ago it is was and how he’d been a bit ill before the move. We even spoke about the specifics such as how many times he’d vomited and whether he was displaying any other symptoms.

“Dan, you go and take a couple of minutes to yourself in the living room,” she suggested, “I’m going to go in and see him, but I want you to try and calm yourself down a little.”

I went to the living room but found myself pacing around, rather than trying to relax and calm down. What if it was something really serious and I just hadn’t picked up on it? I stopped myself and took a couple of deep breaths. He’ll be fine. He’ll be fine. I tried to tell myself that, but I couldn’t bring myself to believe it. My throat felt tight, and I was starting to feel the slightly nauseous feeling that sometimes came with an anxiety attack.

I realised that I should take my anxiety relief tablets before things got worse; I had to stay strong for Phil. The only snag was they were in our en-suite bathroom, and getting to them meant interrupting Phil’s mum as she checked up on him.

Steeling myself with the knowledge that this was my house and I could go where I pleased, I pushed open the door and walked into our bedroom. Phil’s mum was sitting on the bed next to him, one hand resting on the lump in the duvet that was his leg.

“Sorry I just need to get my anxiety medication from the bathroom,” I rushed, explaining my intrusion.

I hurried into the bathroom, grabbed the tablets and hurried back through again. I took them to the kitchen, where I steadied myself against the counter as I filled myself a glass of water.

I downed the tablets and a few glugs of water, then forced myself to sit down on one of the sofas in the living room. I felt myself twitching, my anxiety wanting to get up and pace around and panic. I fought against it, trying to regulate my breathing while taking sips of water.

I was still shaking a bit when Phil’s mum came in, and I had adopted a blanket to wear as an extra layer.

“Dan, are you okay?” She asked, “Phil was concerned when you came in to get your…?”

“Anxiety medication,” I finished for her, “I’m fine, I’m just feeling a bit panicky and it’ll stop me getting worse. Is Phil okay? I’m worried and I was finding it difficult not to think the worst.”

“He doesn’t have a temperature, so that rules out a lot of things,” she told me, “I’ve spoken to him about it, and it seems likely that something he ate didn’t like him. I think you should take him to the doctor’s tomorrow and see if they can help figure out what’s happened. As for tonight, I think he’ll be okay; just keep an eye on him. Make sure that he’s breathing okay, because breathing difficulties could mean a serious allergy, but I think that would have sprung up already if it was an issue. If he gets worse, get him to the hospital and phone me, but I think he’s going to be fine.”

I nodded, feeling relief that she thought he was fine. I was still a little anxious, but it was nothing I couldn’t deal with.

“Are you going to be okay?” She asked me, “You don’t want me to stay over for support?”

“I’ll be fine,” I told her, “I just needed someone else’s opinion on what to do. Thank you.”

“It’s no problem,” she said, “Anytime, well hopefully that won’t be needed, but you know what I mean.”

“Yeah,” I laughed, “I’m going to back and see Phil, but do you want a cup of tea or anything?”

“Yeah, tea would be great, but I can help myself,” she told me, “I know you won’t want to leave Phil for too long.”

Thanking her for understanding, I headed for our bedroom. I slowly pushed open the door, and walked over to the bed, where Phil was now sitting up again.

“Hey,” I said to him, “Your mum thinks you’re okay too which is relieving.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, “I don’t feel it, but I trust her judgement. Are you okay? I was a bit worried when you rushed in for your anxiety stuff.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I told him, “I was just a bit worried and I could feel it coming and I didn’t want to have an anxiety attack.”

“I’d ask you to come here and I’d give you a hug, but you probably don’t want that as I’m all sick and gross,” Phil commented, laughing slightly.

“I don’t mind,” I said, hopping up onto the bed and sliding across to him, “Though you’re the one who needs the hug.”

I wrapped my arms loosely around Phil, still giving him the freedom to move if he needed to. He didn’t seem to relax particularly as I noticed he was still holding his bucket with a death grip.

“Relax,” I mumbled to him, “Being all tensed up isn’t going to help. Are you feeling any better?”

“I don’t feel so much like I’m going to throw up now,” he told me, “My stomach still feels all wobbly though.”

“Do you think we can put this bucket down then?” I asked him.

“I think so…” he said, a little uncertainly.

“Okay,” I said, taking it from him and lowering it to the floor next to the bed, “Tell me if you feel you need it again; we’ll keep it within reach.”

“Thanks,” Phil sighed, now leaning back against me tiredly.

I returned my arms to their position around Phil, and slid one up his shirt a little to rest on his stomach. I knew a cool hand sometimes made it feel a little better, but I wasn’t going any further, because the likes of a stomach massage would probably make him feel worse.

“What will we do about my birthday and Adam coming?” Phil asked, out of the blue.

“What about them?” I asked, a little confused.

“Like if I’m not better?” Phil explained.

“Your mum knows you’re sick; I’m sure all we’ll need to do is tell her if you’re not up for it,” I said, “And as for Adam; he won’t be coming until Monday and this is only Thursday, so you have plenty time to get better.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Phil agreed.

Phil’s mum suddenly poked her head around the door, “Either of you want tea?”

I looked to Phil first, before answering for myself, “We bought chamomile this morning; it might help your stomach a little?”

“Okay,” Phil nodded.

“Yeah if you could make us each a cup of chamomile tea, that would be great,” I told her, “No milk or anything though.”

Once Phil’s mum was away again, Phil snuggled further into me, “I’m really tired.”

“Yeah, we should get to bed once your mum leaves, I’m getting sleepy from my medicine too,” I admitted.

When Phil’s mum came back with the three cups of tea, we all sat and drank it together, Phil and I cuddled together at the top of the bed, and Phil’s mum sitting on a chair near the bottom. Phil seemed to be nursing his tea happily, it not having any negative effects. In fact, I’d say a little colour was starting to return to his cheeks.

I think Phil’s mum noticed that we were both tired, as, as soon as she’d finished her tea, she was saying that she’d better be off. I got up to let her out and lock up, but as soon as she was gone, I rejoined Phil in bed. We were both exhausted and happy to go to sleep straight away.

However, I had to do a couple of things first; I had to set an alarm for the morning, so that I could call the doctor’s and arrange Phil an appointment before anyone else got in there. I also made sure things were on hand if Phil got sick again in the night. The bucket remained on the floor next to his bed, and I made sure he had a glass of water on his bedside table.

Phil and I laid down, but I waited until he was asleep before letting myself shut my eyes. There was nothing worse than being alone and awake at night when you were ill. I’d been there many times myself, and knew that having someone watching over you was very comforting.

I refrained from holding Phil close, giving him some space in case he needed to get up. I shut my eyes and hoped with all my might that he would feel better tomorrow.

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