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letsperaltiago · 3 years

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🌟 HAPPY 12TH OF DECEMBER: DOOR TWO 🌟

Welcome to door two of four!

Behind my Christmas calendar’s second door is a... dating, kind of early-relationship, Peraltiago Christmas oneshot! ♥️

Summary: Amy feels like Christmas is crumbling around her and when the stress becomes too much, boyfriend Jake steps in and takes care of it. Takes place somewhere right before S03 E10: Yippie Kayak.

Rating: G

Words: 4k (just barely)

Read on AO3 here

🎁⬇️OPEN DOOR TWO HERE ⬇️🎁

my gift to you is all my heart

Christmas 2015 is the most special one so far, Jake dares to admit - and that’s coming from a guy who really couldn’t care any less about the season of families pretending to be picture-perfect and a 'shallow but pour some glitter on it'-kind of joy. Slap some red and green colors on an otherwise dysfunctional world and call it a happy place for a month or two.

It’s not that he wants or aspires to hate Christmas; it’s not that he wants to be the cynical one in a crowd of happiness and optimism. There just happens to be a lot of wounds, never fully healed scars, from the many lonely Christmases he spent as a child and teenager. Between his dad considering his parental role a part-time job and his mother working full-time to make a living for them, there wasn’t much - if anything at all - for Jake to love about the holidays and more specifically Christmas. On the contrary, the season rather emphasized how dysfunctional his family was...

Perhaps this year, he really hopes, the season of joy and light will feel more… like a season of joy and light. This year he has Amy which is an experience he’s never, obviously, had before and something he’s more than excited to try. His girlfriend loves Christmas and hopefully, it’ll rub off on him even though he’s surely the Grinch in their relationship the second Thanksgiving hits. It’s almost as if, for a month or so, he and Amy’s dynamic is completely flipped upside down. Not that he's calling his girlfriend a Grinch! Although, a secret to no one, Amy does take on a more serious role in their relationship. All that aside: the second the holidays come around, Amy is the most bubbly and cheery about silly, in Jake’s opinion, stuff like napkin-like turkey, too many pies, secret Santas, seizure-inducing fairy lights, and the only thing worse than normal vegetables: baked vegetables… Meanwhile, he’d rather isolate himself in his apartment, with his mayo-spoonsies and Die Hard, as the delusional world outside goes on.

Then again: he hasn’t had Amy around, at least as a girlfriend, before.

It’s a few days before Christmas eve. An evening he’s not looking forward to since Amy’s leaving tomorrow to spend the day and weekend at her parents’ place - which means not with him, and it’s definitely activating his so far decently subdued inner Grinch. How come Christmas wants to come off as this super jolly season when actually it forces him to be away from his girlfriend? What a scam.

About an hour ago he arrived at Amy’s place to find the door locked, which was weird considering that it was her precious day off. Luckily Amy’s already figured out that her boyfriend is of the clingy kind, which she enjoys, so she’s given him a key to her place. This so he can - quote Amy - “Come and go as you please. Like a cat. A really cute, hot cat.”

He’d chuckled at her comment, then kissed her out of sheer happiness because he has a girlfriend that wants him to have a key to her place! A girlfriend who wants him to drop by and cuddle her, laugh with her and annoy her - whenever!

And so here he is: flopped down on his girlfriend’s couch, watching Die Hard, since it’s the only Christmas movie he can stand to watch. He’d sent her a text telling her he was here, making sure he wouldn’t scare her whenever she was to arrive, but alas never heard anything back. This he suddenly realizes as Hans Gruber is taking the people inside of Nakatomi plaza hostage. He hopes she’s okay, suddenly feeling a bit worried. However, the feeling doesn’t last for long. Basically stumbling through the door comes Amy holding what looks like a thousand shopping bags, which impresses Jake so much that he misses the worried frown and sweaty glow on her forehead.

Being the good boyfriend he is, something he takes a lot of pride in, he of course jumps from the couch to help her. “Hey, babe. Need any help?”

“No, don’t worry about it.”

His offer just barely manages to make it out of his mouth before she’s already dismissed him and disappears into her so-called happy place - in reality, a room dedicated to all of her books and crafts.

Even though he doesn't comment on it, it's unmistakably unusual behavior for her. “You sure? I can do whatever you need; help you unpack, make you some coffee, look cute…”

In her little office, Amy is marching, all at once systematically and chaotically, around the room like the devil is after her. It’s as if he isn’t there, as if she’s avoiding him, and just barely takes the time to stop and throw him a vague glance. “Jake, please. I just need some space. I have presents to wrap and… stuff.”

Oh. Space. The word doesn't go by unnoticed and makes Jake's stomach drop. Space is usually not a good word when coming from a partner, he’s experienced, and this time around it seems to sting that much more than back with Sophia. Is this the end of him and Amy already?

Everything they've done runs through his mind with the speed of light. Things were going so well, he thought. Just yesterday they’d been snuggling on her couch, sharing lazy kisses and giggles as their favorite show (they have a show!!) played in the background. Things like “I love my family but I can’t wait to see you again after Christmas” and “Can you believe how far we’ve gotten since this time last year?” were said, making Jake feel so infatuated and sure. They'd even kissed and made stupid remarks at each other under the mistletoe Jake put up in the door frame leading to her bedroom.

Now, suddenly, it seems as if he’s the last person Amy wants around. Without even consciously deciding to do so he backs away from the tiny office, thus allow his girlfriend some… space. God, he hates that word and every memory associated with it.

Communication is key, Jake knows. However, it’s not as if it went well the last time he kicked down the doors when a girlfriend asked for space. Hence why he doesn’t dare to kick down any doors, literally or metaphorically, when the one to Amy’s office is closed.

He doesn’t know what to do; he doesn’t know what he can do? Make coffee - he can do that right? At this point, he isn't sure of anything. His heart starts beating faster and faster against his ribs, and he knows it’s because, maybe not that deep down, he’s afraid. Afraid of losing the possibly best thing that’s ever happened to him.

Coming from behind the shut door Jake can hear thumps and paper rustling. Jake isn’t the big Christmas-connoisseur but even so, he finds, what he believes is, Amy’s present-wrapping abnormally loud and chaotic - something that seems as unlike Amy as can be. He’s brewing a pot of coffee, for the both of them, something he hopes will be well-received, when suddenly the sounds coming from his girlfriend’s furious wrapping-project goes silent. All at once, with a thump, as if she’s hit a wall.

The silence lasts, and though Jake expects the rustling to pick back up any second, it doesn’t. He can feel himself grow considerably more worried. A big part of him, the one that’s still suffering Sophia’s actions even though he is fully and completely over her, haunts him. It feels a lot like being in a tug-of-war between pressing his way into the room, thus whatever is going on with Amy, and staying back and out of his girlfriend’s sudden need for space.

What does it for him is the sound of a loud mix between a groan and a whine. He has to go in, he quickly decides. Gently he pushes open the door, just enough for him to peak his head inside the room, and the sight before him certainly doesn’t calm his nerves: Amy, sitting at her little office desk with her computer before her, with her face buried in her hands and ripped wrapping paper surrounding her. He can’t tell if she is, but just the thought of her crying makes his heart wrench.

“Amy?”

The way her posture completely changes in reaction to the sound of his voice, from hunched over the desk to sitting straight up, as if she’s hiding something surely can’t be good. Even though she tries to be discreet about it, Jake can tell how she quickly wipes her eyes with the back of her hands. In a motion she hopes is discreet but isn't. If Jake’s poor heart wasn’t scratching the bottom of his gut already then it definitely is now. Still, he pushes the door wide open and tries one more time with a voice so soft and attentive that usually only comes out when they’re being really emotional; something he’s trying to grow into and better at. For her.

“Ames… Are you okay?”

Even though there’s no one else but them in the apartment - hopefully, it is Brooklyn, after all - he closes the door behind him to give them some privacy.

“I’m fine, Jake.”

Fine is definitely not how she sounds, a shakiness to her voice, and how she looks averting his gaze, rather diverting her eyes to her laptop screen. To make it even clearer she starts typing - she isn’t fine. Anything that can keep her busy and from unveiling the true colors of the situation seems to be on her agenda.

The urge to back out is so strong, overwhelming, and Jake quickly recognizes the old, certainly bad habit. Although this time around, with Amy before him like this - hunched over and so far from the confident Amy he knows - he also feels the opposing yearning to stay and challenge his former habits. For himself, for Amy, for them - the best six months of his life. Seven, to be precise. The fact that he cares to keep up with this, how long they've been together, says a lot about where he’s at. With her he’ll count every month, week, day, hour, minute and second he gets to be with her.

Emotions are key. He needs to do emotions - the very serious kind.

“You’re…” he halts for a second, feeling as if he’s about to jump off a cliff - not that he's ever tried it before. But it must feel scary. Kind of like this right now. “You're not fine. Obviously.”

Slowly he walks towards her and, after hesitating with his hands waiting in the air above her, contemplating whether it's what he should do or not, he places his hands on her shoulders. The way she stiffens under his touch has him alarmed, but just as quickly as she's tensed up she relaxes. As if she realizes she can safely surrender whatever fears or worries she has to him.

“Tell me what’s wrong - please. Is it something I did?”

“No!” She flies around in her seat to face him to hopefully undo whatever worries about them she's ignited. The first thing Jake notices then is her somewhat red eyes and a look that begs for him to believe her. Hesitantly, he does. Still, it doesn’t make the sinking feeling in his stomach vanish.

Amy turns back around in her seat to face the lit laptop to hide. Frustrated she runs her fingers through her otherwise perfect hair and ruins her perfect ponytail; small tufts of hair on the loose and going in whichever direction they please. Something he's only used to seeing first thing in the morning or late in the afternoon before bed. And even though Jake loves sleepy Amy, morning hair, makeup-free face and all, he wants nothing more than to fix her hair for her, carefully weave the flyaways back into the otherwise still somewhat neat ponytail.

“Ames, I’m just kinda worried. Tell me what’s up, please… Even if it has something to do with me.” His hands never let go of the soft grip on her shoulders as he says this. Right now holding on to her feels like the only grounding element in his universe. She suddenly feels tense under his touch again and he hates that he might be the one doing this to her.

“It’s really... stupid.”

His eyes wander across the lit laptop screen in hopes of a possible hint. USPS Tracking Service.

“I’m sure it’s not stupid, babe.”

“I just-” her hand reaches for the mouse but then hesitates as if touching it will expose her. Either way, she decides to go for it; she grabs the mouse and opens the program containing, what he recognizes as, her day to day calendar - the step down from her life calendar. "I bought this really beautiful necklace for my mom for Christmas…”

He figures they’ve got some time ahead of them and gently pulls over an extra chair for him to sit on. In his seat next to her he follows the cursor on her screen, flying all over the different dates, boxes, color-coded labels and appointments - the many perfect elements of a Santiago-calendar.

“But then earlier, a few subway stops before home, I got an email from USPS saying that the package's arrival would be delayed! So I tried to work a timeslot into my schedule, for me to shop for a new gift from my mom, but it’s impossible." Every word flies out of her so fast she can barely catch her breath and the last part basically comes out of her in the tone of a wail. Jake can easily sense that she’s riled up and is making it hard for herself to calm down. With every word, she grows more and more frantic, panicky, as she switches back to the window with her calendar. What he sees shows, indeed, no room for gift shopping. He knows she thrives on it but he sometimes wonders how his girlfriend lives her life, densely packed, like this.

“I knew it’d be hard to fit in, with me working a full shift tomorrow, the polar swim and then leaving for my parents’ right after, but I thought it'd be possible! Turns out it isn’t... I’ve tried to re-arrange the next 24 hours in my calendar in every way thinkable and nothing works. Nothing.”

“Honey...” he consoles, calmly placing a hand on top of hers. On his face is a small smile, one that can rest in the fact that there was indeed nothing wrong with them, even though he of course feels some concern for his girlfriend who is clearly completely beside herself. Though she's finally speaking up rather than shutting him out, it's obvious that it doesn't come easy to her and there's a vulnerability to her panicky explanation. But it's not, never will be, something that'll scare him away. "... It's okay."

"No, it's not, Jake!"

Yelling isn't exactly the right term but it's clear that the two are of a different point of view.

"I had ordered my mom the perfect Christmas present, one that would so surely beat my brother David's, and now? It's ruined. I won't receive the stupid present in time and I don't have time to shop for a replacement, which, either way, will be less good. I might as well stay home for Christmas this year and spare myself the embarrassment."

It takes a beat of silence for Jake to assemble his thoughts and form an answer. The smile from before is once again back; he knows how to kill her insecurities - with kindness.

"While I would not mind you staying here with me..." He leans in to place a soft peck on her shoulder. "... I'm sure there's no way your mother would want you to stay away simply because of something as silly as a present - no offense."

"Jake, I appreciate your support but you don't know her like I do."

Though the situation reminds Jake of just how stubborn his girlfriend can be, something both frustrating but also endearing, he also remembers just how stubborn he can be. Maybe this time, for once, the latter can come in useful. If there's anything more stubborn than a panicked Amy then it's without a doubt a Jake who wants to see his girlfriend smile. He's a man on a mission - Amy's very own John McClane.

"Okay... I know I have a questionable track record but hear me out..."

She looks at him and for a second, upon seeing the anxiety in her eyes, he stutters to assemble himself one last time before showing her, at least trying to, that he can take control and help her handle her problems - even the worst which honestly isn't as bad as she might think. Softly, making sure to not alarm her, he reaches over to remove her hand from its tight grip on the mouse and replace it with his own. With it, he moves the cursor on the screen to point at the blue '9 AM to 5 PM'-time slot labeled Work, followed by a yellow 'Polar Swim'-slot at 5.30 PM.

"... I was supposed to be off a bit earlier tomorrow but let me fill in for you instead. You can leave at 4, go get your mom a gift, which she by the way will love, and make it back in time for the polar swim. I'll stay till 5 for you. I'll run the arrangement by Holt so you don't have to worry about it."

The silence is loud but not loud enough to hide her thinking; it screams through the way she bites her lip and eyes wander all over his face in search of some kind of truth. She turns her entire body in her seat to fully face him and, somehow, she suddenly looks both cheered up but also remorseful.

"Jake, thank you, but you don't have to do that for me. I know I'm just being crazy. My mom can do without a gift this year."

"Amy Santiago," he reprimands before grabbing both of her hands in his, making sure to keep a hold of her gaze in the process. "Maybe I don't have to but I want to. Ames, let yourself live out the full 'Peralta boyfriend'-experience. Also, stop calling yourself crazy when, in reality, you just care a lot. That's good; to care like you do."

Finally, after it being gone for so long, he catches a glimpse of her characteristic glow. Her eyes are also once again shiny and inspired, and he knows he's doing something right. Everything within him wants to do right for her. For a moment they quietly stay back, in each their seat, and look at each other with admiring eyes. Both wondering how they got so entangled in the other's very much different lives. Yet both eternally grateful. Amy's the first to break and throws her arms around his neck.

"You're the best, Jake," she declares with newfound peace of mind. "Thank you so much."

"No need to thank me." His arms have returned the favor and are securely wrapped around her waist. He's forever sure; nothing feels better than holding her like this. Happy. They stay like this for who knows how long, for seconds or hours, until Jake suddenly retreats into his seat and offers her a cocked brow along with a teasing smile.

"By the way... What's up with the wrapping paper-mess?"

"I had to test the new wrapping paper I got!"

He chuckles. God, he adores her.

"But why the mess?" He hicks a ripped piece of paper lying at his feet.

"Turns out I've bought the worst kind of wrapping paper and I got... pissed." She timidly looks down but still smiles, Jake hopes it's because she knows he likes her love and passion for all things crafty. They go silent and he can tell she's thinking. She pushes a strand of hair behind her ear, rather insecurely and not affectionately like she would with a double tuck.

"By the way..." She clears her throat then looks at him. Right in the eye. "I'm sorry for earlier. I didn't mean to cut you off and push you away like I did. That wasn't okay - at all. I just-" the words get tangled up and caught in her throat to which Jake reacts by reaching over and softly clutching her knee followed by a comforting squeeze. In his eyes, she sees an invitation to speak her mind and she wonders, every day, how she ever lived her life without him by her side like this. The least she can do is explain her actions, ones that were actually just caused by a stupid defense-mechanism.

"I just didn't want you to see this... unfavorable side of me, I guess. I know I can be a bit much."

"Amy," he coos hearteningly. "Of all the sides of you that I've seen, or you will come to show me as this relationship evolves, never have I ever found any of them unfavorable. You're not 'a bit much'... You're everything I want and need."

Though he doesn't dare say it, not quite yet, this feels a lot like an undefined definition of love - one, he's quite sure, comes from everything she's taught him, shown him, and made him feel these past seven months.

She leans over the gap between them. Their lips collide in a kiss so meaningful that it speaks louder and more clear than any words ever could. He tastes like cinnamon and coffee, and with him she feels safe, like there are no ugly truths about her for him to see through. Every day with Jake is like coming home is. It's no longer just unlocking and walking through a door: it's being herself, even during critical moments, and still feeling welcome in her boyfriend's embrace and eyes. Her hands cling onto his cheeks for dear life, pouring all her emotions into the soft movement of her lips, and it's the most accepted and cherished her A-type self has felt in a partner's presence. Who would've thought that this kind of string of emotions would be a reaction to the touch and care of Jake Peralta?

On his part, with the three magic words just barely clinging to his tongue, he internally decides to hold back and keep them for a more suitable moment. Even if, something he's learned from their relationship, there is no such thing as 'the right time'. 'The right time' is only a theory made up by hopeful, sometimes also hopeless, lovers. Much like themselves just barely a year ago. But with this one declaration, what he hopes will be the greatest I love you of his lifetime, he does want some control. The moment shouldn't be surrounded by ripped wrapping paper and tipped over shopping bags.

Hopefully, she can wait just a bit longer. Then he'll tell her, even yell at the top of his longs, that he loves her. He loves Amy Santiago.

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deans-baby-momma · 4 years

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Mommy’s (Not So) Good Girl-18

By New Year's Eve Mom was over her disappointment at the lack of a ring and a proposal and had thrown her all into hosting the block's best New Years party ever.

As I was growing up, Mom and I would attend the others' celebrations but usually ended up back home before the ball dropped and would watch it together, cuddled up on the sofa at home.

That happened more regularly once Ben arrived; being closer to the bed for when the kid went to sleep.

This year though Mom had apparently volunteered to hold the annual party and from the time we woke up on December 31st, we were put to work getting things set up.

Ben and I are left at home, working on cleaning up the house while Dean and Mom run to the store for some last minute items and more booze.

As I'm putting the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher, I think back to just seven days ago when on Christmas Eve, Dean had given me the item he had visited the jewelry store for.

FLASHBACK

"It was your bracelet that had me going back to that store," he explained. "The incompetent sales guy couldn't get the protection sigil correct. I kept having to return it."

"Why? Does it really matt-"

"Yes-" he whisper-yelled at me. "Yes it matters. It has to be flawless. One small imperfection and it doesn't work. "

The way he demanded that the bauble be correct made me wonder if he actually believed in the power of something supernatural. Then again, he must because he has the same symbol tattooed on his chest. It made me see Dean Winchester in a whole new light. He was superstitious.

END FLASHBACK

And I’m not going to lie, it made me feel…...loved. That he cared enough for me to get something that he believed would protect and shield me. Wait, did Dean love me?! No, we were just two people fucking around, right? No feelings or emotions involved.

As soon as I start up the dishwasher I rush back to my room and go straight to my jewelry box. The hinges creak lowly as I open the lid and pull out the bangle. I stare at it and smile, realizing the significance of the gift. Dean loves me. Dean wants to keep me safe. Tears pop into my eyes as I look at each charm. Each one holds a special meaning, an understanding between the two of us; only the two of us.

The heart with the words ‘Baby Girl’ engraved on it is special because that it what Dean calls me when we are intimate; the disc shaped with the word ‘Daddy’ on it because that’s what I call him in those times; the diamond encrusted dollar sign because he actually listens and pays attention about my hopes and dreams of becoming a finance advisor someday. And then of course the protection symbol; he wants to protect me and keep me safe.

I can feel the love and adoration just by simply looking at the bracelet. Which, come to think of it, Dean probably realized that and bought it so I could feel his yearning while away at campus. I close my hand around the chain and bring my fist to my heart. “I love you too,” I whisper into the air before I place it back into the box and shut the lid.

When Mom and Dean return, I can’t help but steal looks and glances at the man I am falling in love with. He is so generous, so big-hearted, honest and trust-worthy. I am glad that the person I have finally fallen for is a man who should be admired. A man who should be cherished. I vow right then and there to make sure he doesn’t go a day without knowing how much I appreciate and value him.

When the house is full and the party is thriving, I take a chance at getting a drink. Yes, I am 21 years old now and this would not be my first adult beverage but I have never attempted this in the presence of my mother. How is she going to react to see me enjoying an alcoholic drink.

Then, I remember she has been witness to it. The fucking video of me at Halloween, grinding on Taylor and talking about sex. With Dean; with the man she has been living with for the last 8 months!

I carry the red solo cup through the house, smiling and greeting people as I pass until I get to the back patio where some of the more inebriated couples have seemed to congregate. I guess the illusion of the darkness of night has lured them outside. ‘Hopefully the ones out there are with the ones they arrived with or this could really turn into a mess,’ I think as I open the door and step out into the night air.

It’s chilly and there are traces of snow on the ground from the storm we got last week but the temperatures have been mild and on the warmer side so here it is New Year’s Eve, a few hours before midnight and people are mingling outside.

“Abby!” Brad calls when he spots me and I roll my eyes. He is standing in the corner with Debby, another girl from our high school class. From the look on her face and the glare she sends my way, I definitely interrupted something between them.

“Hey Brad,” I say as I approach them, keeping a decent distance.

“I see Mommy’s good girl isn’t such a good girl anymore,” he smirks and looks down at the cup in my grasp. “Or is that just soda?”

“No Brad,” I sneer. “It’s not just soda. Ya know, I turned 21 this year. I am legal. Are you or her?” I ask, nodding toward Debby.

“Oh that’s right,” Brad says as he steps away from Debby and approaches me. “You got a lot for your 21st birthday didn’t you? Got yourself a ‘Daddy’.”

I look at Brad wide-eyed and he chuckles. “Yea I saw the video. I think the whole world has seen the horny bunny talking about her Daddy. Just exactly who is this Daddy character that’s been messing around with my girl?”

Brad places his arm on my shoulders and I quickly shrug it off. “I’m not your girl, Brad. Never have been, never will be.” I turn and walk back into the house.

Brad continues to provoke me as he yells out, “Does he even exist Abby?’ and laughs as he makes his way back to his date.

Back inside, the music was louder and conversations were harder to hear; only snippets of dialogue. The Parks from across the street were in the dining room discussing something with the Jackson’s, and Brad’s parents, from down the way; Mom and Dean were in the kitchen talking with Stan and his wife, Monica from next door. Others were throughout the house debating this and that.

I walked toward my room, where I could be alone. Even Ben had a “date” as he was in his room with Noah playing video games. I was the odd man out. I had no date and no one to talk to so why even bother to mingle?

At a quarter to midnight, Mom knocks on my door to inform me that everyone's gathering around the television to watch the new year come in. I follow her down the hall to the front room where all the couples, excluding Ben and Noah, are hugged up and looking excited to watch 2010 become 2011.

I, on the other hand, couldn’t care less. I didn’t have anyone to celebrate it with.

5...

4...

3...

2...

Everyone in the house yells out “Happy New Year” and then I am surrounded by eight couples kissing while the ages old song, Auld Lang Syne is played through the tv speakers. I quietly tap my foot waiting for them all to break apart so I can bid them all a goodnight and retreat back to my room.

What I didn’t expect was for Dean to pull away from Mom and head toward me, a sheepish grin on his face. Was he going to kiss me? In front of Mom and all the others? What the hell is going on? Am I dreaming?

I must be. I am probably still hiding out in my bedroom, asleep on my bed, dreaming of getting to kiss the one man I want to on this night because there is no way in hell that is about to happen!

@lostinaseaoffictionalbliss @spnbaby-67 @tftumblin @sea040561 @delightfullykrispypeach @larajadeschmidt13 @vicariouslythruspn @squirrelnotsam @death-unbecomes-you @sandlee44 @blacktithe7 @deanwanddamons @hoboal87 @marvelfanbrenda @vicmc624 @smoothdogsgirl @elliloumom @stoneyggirl @kricketc29

#series #Mommy's (Not So) Good Girl #dean winchester #lisa braeden #abby braeden #ben braeden #dean x lisa #dean x abby #canon divergence #supernatural #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #Smut #angst #fluff #season 6

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strugglingartistno16 · 4 years

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Let’s open that first door

A/N: This drabble is a part of @writerofbts “25 Days Of Christmas Challenge”! I really hope that you’ll enjoy it and please check her blog out if you haven’t already, she’s an amazing writer.

Prompt: Opening The First Door Of The Advent Calendar

Pairing: Kim Namjoon x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Wordcount: 1539

~ Regular Masterlist ~

~ Masterlist for 25 Days Of Christmas ~

It had been a couple of tough weeks, if not months for your long distant relationship with Namjoon. Of course, being so far away from one another for so long at a time can be difficult, but you were pushing through.

Deciding that you wanted to surprise him while he was at home and working on some new songs, you were glad to have finally reached your hotel hours after leaving your home country. As you dialed up his phone number, ready to finally hear his voice again, you made your way to his apartment.

“Hey Y/N!” Namjoon greeted you happily. “What’s up?”

“Oh, you know. Just hanging around,” you giggled as you reached his street. “Listen, there’s something important I have to tell you.”

There was a moment of silence before Namjoon answered. “Really? What is it?”

Another small laugh escaped from your lips as you stood in front of his door. “Maybe I could tell you in person?”

It only took him a few seconds before the front door was ripped open. There stood a completely overwhelmed and perplex looking Namjoon, but as soon as you threw your arms around him and plastered his surprised face with kisses, his tensed shoulders relaxed almost immediately.

“What are you doing here?” He mumbled into your hair, as he pulled you tighter towards him, the realization that you were indeed here with him finally setting in.

“I came to surprise you,” You explained, as you followed him into his home.

Namjoon nodded as he immediately headed into the kitchen, preparing a hot cup of tea for the two of you. The temperature had dropped rapidly in the last few weeks of November in preparation of the even colder months which were to come.

You watched as his long, slender fingers slipped around the kettle, filling it with enough water for the two of you and setting it aside to turn it on. How long has it been since you had seen him last? Two, maybe even three months? He had lost a bit of weight, his cheekbones and jaw more prominent, making you worry about him overworking himself. But as his head turned towards you, bright smile and dimples prominent on his face, your worries were swept aside.

“Sit down, you must be exhausted,” You tell him, as he restlessly walked around the kitchen, preparing something to eat for the two of you.

“I am the one who’s supposed to be exhausted?” He laughed, shaking his head lightly in disbelieve. “You have traveled hours upon hours just to see me.”

You waved your hand in dismiss as you let a small smile slip across your lips. “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”

“Wow, cheesy very much?” Namjoon giggled, as he finally sat across from you, two steaming mugs in both of his hands. He slid one across the table for you to take it, and you gratefully put your freezing fingers around it. “So, how’s life back home? How are your parents? Must be quite exhausting with the holidays coming up,” He asked you, as he took a sip from his hot beverage.

“Oh, it’s alright,” You shrugged your shoulders, but the memory of something made your eyes light up in excitement. “Actually, my parents have prepared this really awesome advent calendar for me. I’m looking forward to opening the first door tomorrow.”

“Well, have you brought it with you?” Namjoon tilted his head as he looked at you with expectant eyes.

Your smile fell as you groaned out in frustration. “I had actually intended to take the first few doors with me, just to open them here, but I have forgotten them at home.”

Namjoon bit his lip as he examined your disappointed face. How could you have left them at your apartment? Of course, you had been late for your flight once again, quickly picking up the last pieces you wanted to take with you for your week-long stay, but the one thing you so desperately wanted to travel with had carelessly been left sitting on your bed.

“I’m sorry baby. Look, if we’re lucky we can go out and maybe still find one,” Namjoon suggested but you shook your head.

“No, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it, it’s just an advent calendar.” You smiled at him as you placed your hand over his on the table. “Let’s spend some time together instead. How about watching a movie? Or going for a walk? It’s supposed to rain really badly tomorrow, so I’d suggest we go out now?”

“That sounds lovely,” Namjoon nodded.

The two of you had spend the remainder of the day and most of the night together, never leaving each-others side. The time was filled with watching ridiculous Christmas movies, eating an insane amount of cookies and cuddling under a warm blanket on the couch.

You had closed your eyes only for a few seconds as Namjoon’s warm body pressed against yours, giving you that feeling of security and home that you had yearned after the past few months, but you knew that you had dozen off and slept much longer than you had intended to do when you opened them once again. It was bright outside, the sun being dimmed by heavy, dark clouds.

You knew that it was raining, as the small droplets of water raced against each other down the windows and it must’ve been freezing outside. As you raised your exhausted body from your warm nest, you noticed that Namjoon was nowhere to be found.

You called out his name a couple of times, but there was no reply. Where was he?

After you roamed every room in his apartment in hopes of finding your missing boyfriend, you finally gave up, as you went into the kitchen and turned on the kettle for some hot tea. Even though it was warm in his home, parts of the outside world still reflected onto it, making you shiver in your light shirt and pajama pants.

You had just fished out two mugs from the cupboard above the stove when you heard the keys turn in the front door. Wiping your head around, you saw an utterly drenched Namjoon stand in the corridor, with two big bags in his hand.

“Morning,” he mumbled as he threw off his soaked shoes and put down the white shopping bags.

“What the hell,” you groaned as you rushed towards him, helping him to get the wet clothing off of his shivering body. “Where have you been?”

Namjoon gave you a small smile as he gestured towards the bags. “I’ve been a bit of Christmas shopping.”

A simple raised eyebrow from you signaled him that you didn’t believe him, but he waited with his answer until he was changed into something warmer and less wet.

As the two of you finally sat down at the kitchen table once again, his cold hands desperately held onto the hot mug in an attempt to take all the heat in. “You can look inside of them, if you’d like,” he informed you as he took a sip from his cup.

Without hesitation, you peeked into the first bag, and to your surprise there were three advent calendars. Two with different kinds of chocolate, whereas the third one was a sort of make up one.

“What is this?” You asked him in confusion as you looked into the other bag with similar content in it.

“Well,” Namjoon began as he turned to you. “You were so upset about your advent calendar at home that I went into the stores as soon as they opened this morning. I didn’t know which kind of calendar you preferred, so I bought all of them.”

Your cheeks turned a bright pink as you suspiciously examined the calendars. Had he really gone out of his way and bought you these calendars just because you had forgotten yours at home? It was freezing outside, the rain never stopping, and he still went out to make you happy on the first day of December.

The warm feeling inside of your cheeks spread inside of your stomach as well, making you feel all giddy and happy inside. “Namjoon, you shouldn’t have,” You grinned as you sat onto his lap, throwing your warm hands around his cold neck.

“But I did. And look how happy you are.” He insisted, his own smile spreading across his face.

You couldn’t wipe off your own, even if you tried, but you quickly replied, “But not because of the calendars.”

When he looked at you with a raised brow, you giggled and placed a soft kiss onto his lips. “It’s because of your gesture, Namjoon. Nobody who’s right in their mind would’ve gone out at this weather to buy their painfully forgetful girlfriend a freaking advent calendar on the first of December.”

“But I’m crazy for you,” Namjoon retorted and you simply rolled your eyes.

“I see how you’ve picked up some lines from Jin,” You teased him as he pouted at you.

But he quickly recovered and began to spread small kisses all over your face. “Come on you brat,” He smiled as he took your hand into his. “Let’s open that first door.”

39 notes · View notes

paulvibe · 4 years

Text

The Assistant (Paul McCartney x Reader) Pt. 6

Words: 3.2k

Warnings: none

A/N: thank you for being patient with me. I’m not gonna lie, I've been a little uninspired lately, so writing has been hard. I also started a new job and have been working so much. But, without further ado: part six :) enjoy. <3

December 1968

November had flown by with little thought about your situation. You’d been so busy with the boys that it hadn’t crossed your mind. Morning sickness was kicking your ass, but you still managed to get up and get into work on time so no one could suspect anything. Ringo, nearly the whole month, kept asking if you’d told Paul yet- to which you’d answer ‘No’ and then looking longingly at the black haired man.

You’d noticed Linda had stopped coming around as often too. And when she did, there was usually a heavy tension between her and Paul. Was this your fault? You didn’t know if Paul had told her or not, and that was the reason, or if their relationship was starting to fall apart. Whatever it was, you still avoided Paul and Klein kept that enforced. There would be times where he would be playing a little tune on the Piano and you felt a longing feeling in your chest to sit by his side, lay your head on his shoulder, and listen as he sang. Ringo could sense your frustrations, longing and want for Paul. It broke his heart to see you so torn over him, and he wished he could slap the bass player to make him realize what he’s done to you.

However, time passes as it will, and it was now late December. Christmas was in a week which meant most of the crew had begun their Holiday breaks. John and Yoko flew to New York, George and Pattie had gone somewhere warm, Ringo and Maureen stayed in town, but they were spending as much time with family as possible; which left Paul and you. Paul hadn’t made any Holiday plans, and continued to show up to the studio to work. You didn’t have any family in the city, and didn't feel like seeing your family to begin with, which meant you were going to be spending the break alone.

You arrived to the studio shortly after 10 today, deciding to let yourself get some extra rest. You were up late the previous night feeling sick and figured since everyone was on break, it was okay. The studio was quiet, save for a handful of people puttering about; the ones who ran the business side of the operation. You made your way to your makeshift office, which was a larger closet with a small window, and entered the room. You tried to decorate the space to give you some Holiday cheer, but your sad decorations didn’t seem to be doing the trick. Your plastic, one foot tall, Christmas tree had somehow gotten bent and now stood in an upside down L shape. The tinsel hung along your desk and doorway had started to come off and droop, and someone had stolen your bowl of festive chocolates. You groaned upon seeing the sad decor, and set your stuff down onto your desk with a heavy sigh. Just as you did so, a knock sounded at the door.

“Come in!” You called, sitting down. The door creaked open revealing Paul. The man walked in, and closed the door behind. You felt your nerves pick up slightly at his presence.

“I brought you tea.” He spoke softly. You now noticed the two mugs, one in each hand, as he held one out for you to grab. You gently grabbed it from him, feeling your fingers tingle after brushing his.

“Oh, thank you.” You commented, feeling a blush cover your cheeks. Paul smiled at you, sitting in a spare chair. He sipped on the tea, and gave you a soft glance.

“Any Christmas plans?” He asked, settling into the chair better. You shook your head before answering.

“No, it’ll just be… me. Have you got any plans?” You finished off, thinking about the little being growing inside of you. Maybe you could buy a few baby clothes to open on Christmas morning.

“Linda is going to visit her family in the States. I decided to stay home, see Dad and Mike.” The man spoke, giving you a look. You nodded, taking a sip. You wanted so badly to go sit on his lap, to cuddle in his neck, to… tell him about his baby.

“That sounds lovely.” You responded instead, and tried to straighten your bent in half tree.

“I was thinking that possibly... You and I could have dinner at some point soon.” Paul spoke so quietly, but you still heard him loud and clear.

“Oh, Paul, with everything going on right now… I- I don’t know if it’s a good idea.” You rushed your answer, standing up now to fix the fallen tinsel.

“Please?” He asked softly, also standing up. His hands gently placed themselves on your waist, and turned you around to face him. Your heartbeat picked up, as your eyes met and you could feel Paul pulling you close enough so your bodies were flush. Your body didn’t know how to respond, though it had been yearning for his touch, for his warmth and attention.

“O-Okay.” You answered, looking up into his eyes. Paul leaned forward, kissing you, adding more pressure with each second before he pulled away. You blinked, feeling happiness warm up your body, as a grin crossed your features. That was the first time you kissed since you had slept together.

“Come over Friday evening, I’ll have a meal prepared, so don’t worry about bringing food.” The man spoke eagerly, a smile also adoring his face. You bit your lip and nodded. Paul quickly kissed you again, squeezing your body close to his. You could feel your small baby bump pushing into him, but didn’t care… You were going to have dinner with Paul.

Friday

You arrived to Paul’s estate shortly after 6 in the evening. Snow had begun to trickle down right before you reached the home, turning the darkened sky a slight purple and gray color. The street lights emitted a gentle glow, showing off the small snowflakes as the came down. Paul’s home radiated, each window was lit with warm yellow light and smoke was coming from the chimney, signalling he’d lit a fire. You felt warm fuzzies take over your nerves as you approached the home and knocked. You could hear heavy footsteps trot to the entrance right before the door was swung open. Your eyes met those of Paul and a smile crossed your face.

“Hello love.” The bass player spoke as you entered and shucked off your winter coat.

“Hi,” You spoke softly. Paul took the coat from your grasp and hung it on the coat rack nearby. You took a moment to admire the man’s home. It’d been decorated for the Holiday, tinsel was hung along the stairs banister, and above entry ways. You also noticed the multiple Christmas trees around the home; one smaller, potted one sat by the door, one stood in the front room, lavishly decorated, and a small one could be seen on the stairs landing.

“How was the drive?” He asked as he put his hand on the small of your back, guiding you towards his living room.

“Alright, it’s snowing though.” You added with a little smile.

“I saw,” The man commented, gesturing for you to sit, “That’s why I started the fire.” He added, pointing to the fireplace. You watched as he made his way over to his small bar, and began pouring drinks for the both of you. You bit the inside of your cheek, knowing you can't drink.

“I appreciate it,” You answered, “It’s quite chilly.” You felt your stomach drop as he walked back over and handed you a cup partly full with some type of dark liquor. You swirled the liquid around the glass, feeling a look of disgust cross your face. The alcohol smell was making you sick. Keeping down what little vomit decided to come up, you set the cup onto the coffee table. Paul took a sip from his own drink before sitting next to you on the couch facing the fireplace. Another Christmas tree sat just to the left of Paul, decorated with gold-colored ornaments and red tinsel.

You could feel the warmth of the fire envelop your person, mixing with Paul’s body heat next to you. He coyly wrapped his arm over your shoulder, leaving his hand resting on the side of your right arm. Being so close to him felt lovely and comforting. Your hand gently rest over your still small baby bump, and your head found Paul’s shoulder to lie on.

As the night went on, you two stayed in the living room chatting about random things before dinner was ready. Then, once everything was prepared, you transitioned to the dining room. Upon entering the space, a handful of candles had been lit and placed on the center of the table, and two set table mats sat adjacent the other as well. Two offset lamps were placed in the corners of the room, giving off a soft yellow glow that bounced off the walls. You noticed the large chandelier hanging over the table had been left off.

‘He’s setting the mood.’ You thought with a little grin. Paul pulled your chair out for you, then pushed you in once you sat. He then began to take lids off the food, revealing chicken Marsala with a few separate dishes of green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, and a little cake for desert.

“Oh my goodness, Paul,” You began, “This is so much, just for me?”

“It’s a special night,” He smiled, pouring two glasses of wine.

“What do you mean ‘special’?” You asked, furrowing your brows. Paul shrugged, setting the wine bottle down and placing a glass in front of you.

“(Y/N), I-,” He paused, “I’ve been holding back about how I feel.” You watched quietly as the man processed his thoughts. As he did so, he began to dish out the food, first serving you.

“Go on, love.” You encouraged him, though feeling electric yourself. He sat down across from you, and looked into your eyes. His normally hazel gaze appeared dark in the dim lighting and his hair and beard contained shimmery accents from the candles. He reached out his hand, silently asking you to hold it. You obliged and gently laced your fingers into his, feeling the roughness of his callused hands.

“I like you… I say to sound like a schoolboy,” He chuckled a bit. You couldn’t help but notice the mild blush cross his cheeks, causing you to giggle as well.

“Well, I like you too.” You responded, biting the inside of your cheek. “I mean, it was kind of obvious three months ago…” You trailed off, reminding him of the night you slept together. He chuckled again, an endearing expression covering his face.

“I thought it was obvious from when you started.” Paul added. You beamed, feeling a blush cross your cheeks but you didn't care. The two of you went quiet for a few moments, beginning to eat. Your mind, however, was swirling-- as well as your stomach and nerves. You two had just admit your feelings, and now sat like a married couple eating dinner. Oh yeah, and you’re pregnant still. What the fuck. God, you wanted to tell him so so badly, but every chance you had, nothing came out of your mouth and you would stand there like a fish out of water. You thought back to your conversation with Ringo at the restaurant. ‘He deserves to know,” The drummer’s voice echoed, then yours followed ‘I’ll tell him when I’m comfortable.’

“Paul,” You began, a little distress lacing your tone. Paul looked up at you, his lashes only adding to the gaze.

“Yes, darling?” His voice was softer, picking up your mood shift. Your emotions started to act up and a lump formed in your throat. You wanted to tell him so badly; It’d been three months of silence. Every moment you faced him was agony because of the little voice inside your head that kept pressuring you to tell your secret; keeping it for so long was eating you up.

“I- I have something to tell you.” Your voice wobbled with the lump only growing in size. A tear slipped down your cheek, but you hastily set down the fork in your hand and wiped it off.

“What’s going on?” Paul whispered, furrowing his brows and grasping your hand again, squeezing it gently.

“Oh Paul,” You whispered, looking down at your plate. More tears fell down your cheeks as you squeeze your eyes shut. You then finally spoke. “I’m, uh, expecting.”

“...Expecting?” He repeated, confusion laced his tone. His hand, however, never left yours.

“I’m, well… I’m pregnant.” Your voice was no louder than a whisper. However due to the quietness of the space, Paul heard you loud and clear. His grip tightened around your hand, and then released as he scoot back in his chair. He used a cloth napkin to wipe his mouth before he spoke.

“Y- you- Are you sure?” He asked softly. You hung your head and nodded sheepishly, feeling knots form in your chest. Paul’s eyes stared at your face then went down your body-- from what he could observe, as you were seated-- stopping at your breasts of course, they had grown in size; then continued down your abdomen and stopped at your stomach.

“Yes, I’m sure. I’m three days shy of fourteen weeks.” You commented, a slight endearing tone overtook your voice as you gently rest your hand on your lower abdomen. Movement in the room caused you to focus on it, witnessing Paul stand up and start to pace. He ran his hand through his hair and then stroked his beard, occasionally looking in your direction. You remained silent, letting the man think through what he needed to. It was a quiet few moments before his voice sounded.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” His tone alone broke your heart, causing the preexisting knots to only tighten and gnarl more. You then stood up and approached the bass player carefully as to not stress him.

“Paul I- I just couldn’t.” You began, “You were busy with the album- and Linda- it’s just, you don’t understand how difficult these past months have been for me.” You were a bit of a mess and you knew it too. You could feel the tears dripping down your cheek--, causing your makeup to smear-- along with the heat radiating off your cheeks. Paul quietly padded over to you, and wrapped his arms firmly around your figure. You sniffled into his chest, trying your best not to ruin the top he was wearing. He gently kissed the top of your head, allowing you time to calm down.

“So, where does that leave us?” You murmured, still secure in Paul’s grasp. The man remained silent for a few moments.

“Well, we can’t go public because of Klein.” He spoke quietly, gently rubbing your back.

“You’re still technically with Linda…” You trailed off, remembering the woman. Lord, you felt disgusting. It’d never occurred to you how awful Linda must feel, and is going to feel once she learns the situation.

“So, we keep this under wraps, at least until we can go public. After the record is out, and all ties are severed from the group.” He spoke, pulling away and turning you to face him. You wiped your eyes and smeared makeup off with a nearby napkin, whispering ‘Sorry’ as the black makeup would stain the cloth.

“Okay,” You murmured, looking up at the man you adored. He gently kissed the top of your head again, pulling you in for another quick hug. You two didn’t speak more on the subject, you merely cleaned up dinner, and then transitioned back to the living room. The fire had died down slightly, so Paul added a few more logs then joined you on the couch. He wrapped his arm over your shoulder, pulling your body close to his. The room was quiet, save for the crackle of the fire. Snow still trickled down outside, as you could see the white powder from a window that didn’t have the curtains drawn. You gently rest your hand over your stomach, and Paul’s free hand quickly followed laying on top of yours.

“I always wanted my own.” He murmured. You looked up to meet his gaze. The fire light added a beautiful golden glow to his hazel eyes and black hair.

“Really?” You asked, elated.

“Yeah. I loved playing with Julien.” He murmured. You nodded, remembering the photos of them together, and how happy the little boy was to be with Paul. Your stomach ached slightly, thinking back to how negative you were about the baby, and it’s father.

“I was so worried you’d want nothing to do with me.” You spoke quietly, playing with a seam on your shirt to avoid eye contact. Paul’s eyes softened at your comment.

“Why would you think that?” He asked, a slight hurt tone to his voice.

“I didn’t have a reason, I just did.” You spoke quietly. Paul sighed and pulled you back into his grasp, kissing the top of your head. The fire crackling interrupted the silence that fell. You began to feel sleepy, being so warm in his arms. You haven’t felt this relaxed in months. Paul didn’t move, though he occasionally kissed your head.

“Darling?” Paul murmured after a couple minutes of silence. You didn’t realize you’d dozed off until you woke with a gentle ‘Huh?’

“Would you like to stay the night?” He asked just as soft. You nodded, sitting up and stretching while Paul stood up and offered his hand to help you stand. You graciously grabbed it and stood up as well. The man put out the fire quickly, then turned off most of the lights. Afterwords, he led you up the stairs to his bedroom. The room was decorated nicely. White sheets donned a king-size bed. Two night stands sat on each side of the bed, with a matching lamps on top. A walk in closet was at the wall opposite the bed, along with the entrance to the bedroom’s attached bathroom. Large windows were covered by white and gray curtains, blocking the view of the city and the falling snow.

Paul was quick to change out of his clothes, remaining in a t-shirt and underwear. He then walked into the closet and pulled out a basic nightie for you to wear. It was probably one of Linda’s and you felt gross even thinking about wearing it, but you didn’t want to sleep in your day clothes.

“I’m going to change in the toilet.” You said softly. Paul nodded, and climbed into the bed. You made your way to the little room and closed the door after flipping on the light. You caught yourself in the mirror, really seeing your appearance now. You had little black smudges around your eyes from where you’d cried then rubbed, and deep blue bags under your eyes. Your nose was slightly red, along with your cheeks. A deep sigh escaped your lips as you moved your gaze from the mirror to the nightie in your hand. It felt like silk, expensive no doubt. You wondered if Paul’d purchased it for Linda. A deep feeling of guilt filled your gut as you changed, but you did your best to push it down before you finished and entered back into the room. Paul smiled at you, gesturing for you to climb into the bed. You did so, climbing close to his figure. Your bare legs touched, causing butterflies to fill your stomach, expelling the guilt. This felt good, you felt good for the first time in months.

--------

Part Seven

#paul mccartney fanfic #paul mccartney fanfiction #the beatles fanfic #the beatles fanfiction #paul mccartney x reader #the beatles x reader

48 notes · View notes

blueplanettrash · 5 years

Text

Day 2: Family Reunion and Unions

Anyone that hates Curtis and Shiro being together can come fucking fight me. Hope you enjoy! 💙

It was almost a relief when the universe didn’t need Voltron anymore. The only problem was, they didn’t know what else they were supposed to do. Even before they left Earth, they were training to become space explorers, but even a few years later, they didn’t want to fight anymore.

Lance was the first to leave the Garrison behind, yearning for the simplicity of life. He took Kaltenecker and the mice and return back to his family’s farm. None of them said it, but they knew that he didn’t want to fight anymore, he was looking for anymore glory. He just wanted to surround himself with the people he loved.

Keith was the next; Krolia and Kolivan put the idea in his head that he could change the way the Galra were seen; help them undertake a new way of life and be proud of the choices they make for their future. It was his own idea to convert the Blade of Marmora into a humanitarian relief after seeing the devastation that stretched across the galaxy. He was proud of the changes that were coming.

Hunk was reluctant to go, but after a bit of a push from everyone, he created his own culinary empire. Wanting to teach everyone the wonders of cooking and how it brought everyone together. He employed anyone who wanted a chance, they just had to be loyal, passionate, and a fast learner.

Pidge was the last to go; she enjoyed working with the Garrison but at the end of the day, she wanted to help lead the next generation of Legendary Defenders. She and Matt were working on a facility to train recruits alongside the MFE team.

The only part of the team left at the Garrison was Shiro, and it would be a lie if he said he didn’t miss them. At that point, it had been over a year since he’d seen any of them and they were all busy, so they couldn’t always just sit down and chat.

So many things seemed to be changing, at least in his life, things were. It got to the point where he kept forgetting that none of his friends knew about his relationship and he’d realize at weird points throughout the day.

“Takashi, what kind of flowers were you thinking about?”

“Ohhh fUCK,”

“What the fuck Takashi…”

He really wanted to have a get-together or something so he could tell all of them the good news but there never seemed to be a good time. As usual, Lance saved him without even realizing it, in the form of a phone call.

“Takashi Shirogane, speaking,” he answered one evening at his desk.

“Whoa, you sound like an actual authority figure,” Lance chuckled. Immediately Shiro’s spirit lightened and a smile spread across his face.

“Lance! Buddy! What’s up? Man, it’s great to hear from you,”

“Yeah, we haven’t talked in a while, huh? I was just wondering what your plans were for Christmas,”

“Christmas?”

He hadn’t really thought about it. He and Curtis didn’t really have anyone to spend Christmas with, except each other of course.

“I don’t have any plans, why?”

“Great! You’re coming to my house!” Lance exclaimed and Shiro had to pull the receiver away he yelled so loud.

“Am I now?” Shiro laughed, looking up as Curtis walked into his office.

“Yes, unless you want to be the only paladin of Voltron not there,” Lance teased.

“Wait, everyone’s gonna be there? I thought Keith and Hunk were in space,”

“There are, until December 25th that is. So, what do you say?”

“Of course I’ll be there!” Shiro said excitedly, eyes glancing over toward Curtis, who was watching him with a fond look on his face.

“Oh, can I bring a plus one?”

“Takashi, are sure about this?” Curtis asked nervously as they walked towards the front door of Lance’s house.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?” He asked, trying to hide his own nervousness.

“They don’t even know that we were dating, now we’re engaged. I think that's a bit of a shock,” Curtis pointed out. “And they barely even know me,”

“Well, now they’ll know you better,” He said as he knocked on the door. It swung open and he was immediately crushed in Hunk’s arms.

“Shiro! Ah man, it’s good to see you,” Hunk sighed cuddling him closer to his chest. Curtis let out a snort as Shiro was lifted off the ground.

“Curtis? Man, I haven’t you in so long either!” He said dropping Shiro back down to scoop Curtis up as well.

“Hey, Hunk!” He said happily, as he tried to breath through the crushing hug.

“Everyone else is in the other room,” Hunk said, leading them further in the house.

“I thought Lance was supposed to be hosting,” Shiro teased.

“Yeah but he’s been working all day and I wanted to cook for everyone so I told him that I would take care of it,” he explained. “Hey, guys! Look who’s here!”

They all jumped up excitedly with smiles stretched across their faces. They all looked so different, even though it hasn’t been that long. They looked so much older than when he last saw them.

“Curtis? What are you doing here?” Keith asked in confusion, breaking Shiro out of his own thoughts.

“He’s my ex-boyfriend,” Shiro stated with a crooked grin.

“Takashi, I told you to stop that,” Curtis laughed, smacking Shiro in the arm with a grin. “I’m his fiancé,”

There was a beat of silence as everyone looked at the two with wide eyes, enough that Curtis looked over at Shiro nervously.

“OH MY GOD!” Hunk and Lance suddenly sobbed as he ran around the table and hugged the two of them tightly, bodies shaking.

“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Lance cried, pulling back to look at the two of them.

“To be perfectly honest...I forgot,” Shiro admitted, yelping when Lance punched him in the flesh arm.

“I want to say I’m surprised but I’m not,” he groaned in exasperation before turning and dragging Curtis over to the couch with him.

“Now then, Curtis, we’re going to have a talk,” Lance said with gleaming eyes. Curtis gulped and glanced over at Shiro.

“Umm, o-okay?” He gave a small, nervous smile.

“You’re gonna tell me,” he trailed off eyes boring into Curtis’. “Everything that’s happened between you since the beginning,” he grinned excitedly.

“Oh! Sure!” Curtis perked up. “I guess I could start with how Takashi asked me out or tried to at least,”

“WHAT! NO! CURTIS PLEASE!” Shiro cried, running forward trying to cover his mouth, but Hunk got behind him and held him back.

They laughed as Curtis revealed Shiro’s bad attempts at flirting, trying vastly different approaches to get his attention and then pretending that he wasn’t looking for it. Or how he’d leave something at his station and look away when Curtis looked over at him.

“I always knew it was him though because his ears would get super red,” Curtis laughed, grabbing Takashi’s hand and rubbing his thumb soothingly over the back.

“Stop exposing me,” Shiro grumbled.

“I thought it was really cute,” Curtis cooed. Shiro’s face went red and he ducked between his shoulders even as he smiled.

“I was the one that finally asked him out though, I didn’t think that he’d ever be able to,” Curtis teased.

“Yeah, yeah, my hero,” Shiro mumbled, with a playful eye roll.

“Well, I don’t know about you guys but I’m starving and dinners just about ready, so why don’t we move this to the dining room,” Hunk suggested after a short bout of silence.

The rest of the night passed with stories of what they’d been up to, what their next steps were, laughing about the past, playing games until they were all spread around the living room asleep. Except for Curtis, who sat on the couch, with Shiro’s head on his lap; fast asleep and drooling on his leg. And Keith who was carefully making his way over to him, tiptoeing overtop of his friend’s bodies.

“Hey, Keith,” Curtis said quietly, stroking Shiro’s hair out of his face. “Are you here to give me the shovel talk?” He chuckled as Keith sat down beside him. Keith snorted and shook his head.

“I’m pretty sure Shiro could take you out all by himself if he wanted to,” he said, pinching Shiro’s nose closed for a second until he let out an ungraceful snore. “I actually wanted to thank you,”

“Thank me?”

“Yeah, I haven’t seen Shiro so happy in a long, long time,” Keith admitted looking down at his brother. Keith’s chin wrinkled up and he covered his eyes as a small sob escaped his mouth. “I’m just happy that he finally gets to relax and be happy,”

Curtis didn’t even think before he had his arm around Keith’s shoulder and tugged him into a hug.

“It definitely goes both ways, I don’t know what I would have done if I didn’t have him,” he admitted. They sat in comfortable silence, Keith letting out the occasional sniff before he finally pulled back and rubbed his eyes.

“Are you okay?” Curtis asked softly. Keith nodded his head, before giving him a small smirk.

“I better be a part of your fucking wedding,”

#vld #voltron #voltron legendary defender #shiro #takashi shirogane #curtis #curtis (voltron)#lance #keith #hunk #pidge #blueplanetchristmas #wedding #fanfic

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madam-wakefield · 5 years

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Christmas Time With You (1/3)

Berena | Fluff | Smut (later chapter) | FR18 | 2,091 words.

Serena sets out to make their first proper join Christmas truly magical for Bernie. My gift for the @berenasecretsanta

I hope my giftee @megredgrave likes what I have written for her prompt “berena in love, fluff, smut, christmas, happiness!”

Also Avaliable on A03

Serena loves Christmas. She always has and always will, so naturally the first year she is due to spend Christmas with Bernie in their shared house, she wants to find out what Bernie thinks Christmas is about.

“What makes Christmas magical for you?” she asks, one morning in late November when the two of them are both still slightly sleep-mussed but cuddled together, with no alarm to rush them out of bed.

“What?” Bernie states dumbly, completely nonplussed by Serena’s question. Bernie looks down at Serena where her head is laid against her chest, trying to understand exactly what she wants to know, thinking maybe she wants present hints.

Serena starts speaking again. She can’t try to meld their Christmases into something special and amazing for the both of them if she doesn’t know what Bernie likes. “Is there anything special you do at Christmas time, any family traditions, any special ornaments that have be hung in a certain place or certain way?”

Bernie shakes her head gently. She thinks she doesn’t need to give more of a response until Serena pushes for it. “What do you mean, no? There has got to be something.”

Bernie smiles gently at Serena, loving the fact they still get to learn new things about each other every day. “I spent so many of my Christmases in different countries—often not even realising it was Christmas Day—I never really got around to making any Christmas traditions.” And Serena gets that when Bernie explains, but it doesn’t mean she isn’t a little saddened by it, so she promises to herself to make Bernie’s Christmas the best one she’s ever had.

The conversation is forgotten, at least by Bernie, until early December. They are in their shared office, which is now decorated for the festive season, catching up on paperwork on what it an unusually quiet shift, especially for December. Serena looks up at Bernie from her computer screen, a smile lighting up her face at the look of concentration on Bernie’s.

“What do you want for Christmas?” Serena then asks out of the blue. She’s got a few ideas but definitely not enough to fill under the tree and Bernie’s stocking.

Bernie taps her computer keyboard for a few more seconds, clearly finishing whatever sentence she was in the middle of writing before looking up at Serena. “I don’t want or need anything, and I wasn’t expecting anything either. I’ve got exactly what I want already.” And the loving look Bernie sends her way leaves no doubt in Serena’s mind that she means her, and she can feel her heart expanding in her chest with the love she has for Bernie.

“I love you,” she states for what must be the millionth time in their relationship, but it doesn’t hold any less meaning than it did the first time she ever uttered the words to Bernie. “I also love that you feel you have everything, but it’s Christmas so there has to be presents.” Bernie can’t help but think this sounds similar to a conversation they had not too long ago about Christmas traditions and once again begins to explain herself

“I love you too, but in my experience, Christmas doesn’t always mean presents. When I was deployed, I was lucky if Marcus actually remembered to take the time to send me a care package Christmas present. And the children spent multiple Christmases without presents while I was abroad because he was too busy and forgot. So honestly, to have someone that’s actually thinking about my needs, while loving, cherishing and adoring me is honestly all I really need.”

Serena’s heart clenches with physical pain and her hate for Marcus grows ten-fold. She’s never been his biggest fan, but since becoming Bernie’s girlfriend, she has learnt a lot about the man that makes her dislike him and this has to be the worst. She cannot believe that someone who claimed to have loved Bernie could forget to send his wife and the mother of his children a present while she was busy serving the country.

Serena decides that right now she can’t continue with paperwork. “Oh Bernie, I’m so sorry. I understand why you feel that way, but I will never not buy you Christmas presents, no matter where in the world you are. And right now, I think we both deserve a break and a strong hot coffee.” She walks around the desk to Bernie’s computer, offering her hand to help her up, and as they leave the office together, she vows once again to make Bernie’s Christmas the most magical ever.

Serena starts to put her plan into action that very weekend. It is traditionally the weekend she puts up the Christmas tree in her house, and always has been. Even if she is at work, she always finds time to decorate the tree. But first she realises that all the decorations are hers and Ellie’s, the little kid ones they made and brought home from school that no parent can ever bring themselves to part with. She decides that Bernie needs to add her own decorations to the tree, so early Saturday morning finds the two of them out shopping.

They spend a while walking around the Christmas market in town, picking up a few presents for Evie, and for Fletch and Mikey. Bernie never knew Christmas could be like this, not suspecting that Serena would buy things for a lot of the people on the ward as well as Fletcher’s children who she makes sure she sees at least once over Christmas.

They find a lovely ornament stand where Bernie finds a wooden wolf ornament that she just falls in love with. And Serena can’t help but think it’s perfect, and will really be Bernie’s own stamp on their Christmas tree. Serena is so excited to get a spend a first magical Christmas at home with Bernie.

The next day Ellie wakes them up bright and early with a knock on the door. “So much for sleepy Sunday morning sex,” Bernie mumbles as she kisses Serena gently before forcing herself into the bathroom to get dressed, leaving Serena to go and answer the door. Before long, however, Bernie almost completely forgets about sleepy Sunday morning sex.

Once Serena and Bernie are both dressed and dosed up with coffee, Ellie sets a totally cheesy Christmas playlist to play through her Bluetooth speaker before they begin the mammoth task of decorating the house and tree. Bernie being Bernie offers to be the one to remove all the decorations from the loft. And she can’t quite believe just how many boxes there are. The years she was home for Christmas she knows they never had more than three boxes of decorations each Christmas, and one of them was the Christmas tree.

Serena sets about untangling the tinsel, laying it out into nice neat rows, and Ellie works on rearranging the mantle. Bernie feels a bit lost, not quite sure what to do with herself. In the end she ends up untangling and testing the Christmas tree lights, replacing any bulbs that are dimming or have already burned out completely.

At exactly 11 o’clock there is a knock at the door, and the local Christmas tree farm has arrived with their tree. Bernie has to admit that once it’s in place in the living room, even before it’s decorated, it looks better than any fake tree she has ever had. And the smell that it emanates from it is just as lovely, and does make her think of Christmas.

Serena makes placing the lights so easy. Bernie has never quite been able to work out where to start, or how not to get them tangled on the tree, or how to make sure they equally fill all the branches, but watching Serena work is magical, the smile on her face is genuine and Bernie is very content to just watch her girlfriend. Bernie is roped into helping with the tinsel, standing around the back of the tree, while the three of them feed the tinsel around to each other to ensure that it is placed just as well at the back as it is the front.

Bernie takes a step back once the tinsel is in place and watches Ellie and Serena set about placing the ornaments with practiced grace. It’s lovely watching the two women work together. She knows Ellie didn’t get on with her too well at first but they have come a long way since then.

“Hey Bernie, come over here and help instead of just staring at mum’s ass, will you?”

Of course, Ellie would bust her like that, but it’s just proof of how far to accepting them as a couple she really has come. And Bernie has to smile. To be welcomed into Serena’s family group like this is more than she could ever have imagined. It also makes her heart yearn for her own children. While Ellie has come a long way in accepting their relationship, her own children still haven’t forgiven her for everything that happened with their dad, and she’s lucky if she gets a short phone call from each of them every month.

She shakes the sadness from her mind for a while, wanting to actually be able to savour these good memories that she’s making with Serena and, of course, Ellie too. She stands to allow Serena to kiss her gently, knowing that her girlfriend knows what she was thinking about, before taking the bauble she offers and setting out to find a place on the tree to hang it.

After she places her first few decorations on the tree, Bernie really starts to get into the swing of it. Her own smile is genuine and she can’t think of anywhere else she’d rather be. When they are close to finishing, the tune coming from Ellie’s speaker changes to ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’, and even with her rubbish music knowledge, Bernie recognizes a few songs when she hears them. “Well, at least I don’t have to worry about that this year, right,” Ellie jokes over the top of the song.

“No, you just have to worry about this instead,” Serena jokes back, before taking two steps towards Bernie and pulling her into a long but chaste kiss. Ellie makes fake sick noises behind them and they all end up in a fit of giggles, unable to continue with any tree decorating for a good five minutes. Once the tree is finished, under Serena’s instruction, Bernie picks up the little paper bag containing her new wolf decoration and places it gently onto the tree. It blends in well with all the elegant decorations hanging there. At the sight of it, Ellie smiles before speaking.

“Wait there, I have something else,” she says before departing the room, Serena and Bernie both look at each other puzzled, but they don’t have any time to ask questions before Ellie is barreling back into the room. She hands Bernie a very similar paper bag. Bernie holds it in her hand for a minute before Ellie prompts her to open it.

Inside is a wooden B engraved with snowflakes and her name. Bernie’s eyes tear up. “Mum and I both have one that she got us our first Christmas alone, and I thought it only right you have one to match to really make you part of the family.” At Ellie’s words Bernie can’t help but let her tears fall as she throws her arms around Ellie, and after a few seconds, she feels Serena join them too.

“Thank you, Ellie, it’s beautiful, and thank you for accepting me into your family. I know you haven’t always found it easy, but it really does mean a lot.” She pulls back then not waiting to push Ellie too far.

“You really have just made me so proud, Ellie,” Serena says, and Bernie can tell from her voice that she’s been crying too. Bernie places the decoration on the branch next to Serena’s similar one, before Serena announces that the tree is officially finished.

They eat a shared lunch and because it’s Christmas, Serena opens a bottle of shiraz—as if she needs an excuse—before the spend the rest of the day decorating the remainder of the house. By the end of the day, Bernie can see why Christmas can really be a magical time, and knows there is nowhere and no one she’d rather be spending Christmas with.

#berena secret santa #Megredgrave #BSS #Holby #Berena #Madam Wakefield Writes

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tetsuwan-atom · 3 years

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@averageisms - Unprompted Starter

It had been three weeks since a certain meeting. Some gifts would be left at the door of Artemis' apartment. A box of chocolates, all assorted. A new Animal Crossing game. A big, blue, cuddly teddy bear, made out of such nice, touchable material.. and a whole bouquet of pink cherry blossoms. There was also a white envelope, the name 'Artemis' written in neat cursive, along with a <3 symbol underneath.

Inside the envelope was a letter, which read as follows:

My Sweet Arte

I hope I didn't take too long in writing this to you and presenting to you these gifts. I wanted to give a little bit of time before properly reaching out to you. I also had to gather my thoughts. I know I was very distressed when I tried to see you again, but please understand, it's not your fault. It was never your fault, for anything.

I feel I don't think it would matter if I tried to explain why I was gone. It is not relevant to the now. It was a really bad ordeal. I thought I was going to die. I know it sounds like some fantasy novel, but putting all the details aside, I was without any way of getting out, I was stranded, alone, for several months. I had nobody to talk to, nobody to help me, until I was eventually rescued. I tried to reach you just before I lost all communication. Literally, I pressed the send button the moment my signal died. If you ever want to I can show you the message I wanted to send, it's still logged, it just never went through, but that is beside the point.

I truly thought about you every day I was gone. Even as weeks went by, I thought of you. I was worried you were scared, about where I had gone, indeed if I had upped and left you. As months went by I got scared myself, that it might have been too long, that you wouldn't want to see me again. I missed so many things, events, my birthday, Christmas. I so wanted to be with you in December. I wished I could have gotten you so many things, I wished we could have done so many things. I never left on my own accord and I can assure you I would never abandon you willingly.

I know you are insecure about yourself, that I might have been too good for you. I understand you were always scared that I could have left you for another woman, some 'better' woman. I never thought that, not even once. Even when I was nearly rescued I never entertained the thought of trying to find someone else if you had moved on. I don't want to. I never want to.

I love you, Arte.

I love you with all of my heart and soul. I yearn to cuddle you in the bed we once shared, to do the things we used to do, to make you mine in carnal desire. I never forgot the times we had sex, when we kissed, when we just chilled. I still remember one day I left work, we went to bed and you just gave me such sweet kisses, such sweet words. That was one of the best moments of my life, as was the day we made love for the first time. I remember the day you cooked a curry for me and I loved every bit of it, I cherished it like it was more than gold, because you made it. I remember when I took you to my own home,we enjoyed eachother in my own bed. I could never forget any of those moments. No relationship is ever perfect, but I always remember the good times. I want that again. I love you, I need you, you drive me crazy, you still turn me on to no end. I think of how we were back then and I yearn for you. I want to lose myself again with you. I miss you terribly, I miss your warmth, your teasing, your libido, I miss everything about you.

I will do anything for you.

Your happiness means more than the world to me, to take away all of your troubles and put a smile on your face, to make the days as good as they can be. I know who you are, what you're like. I love you for who you are, I accept you in every single way. I really do accept you, you are the woman I want to spend my forever with.

I understand, the time apart has been long, I understand now how you were before, that you were over it all, maybe over me. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being away. I'm sorry for not being there, to ease your fears, to hold you, to love you, to tell you that you are the happiness in my life because you really are. I'm sorry you went through such turmoil when I was away. I'm sorry for all the pain I had caused in my absence. I wish I could make it all better.

I'm sorry for losing you.

You never deserve to be alone, ever.

I wish for a second chance with you, I promise you I will not let anything come between us again. I'm on indefinite leave, pending a decision whether or not to go back to the job that took me away from you. They say I can go back with a reduced workload, but I would honestly leave that job, if it means being with you. I would uproot my whole life if it means being with you. I'm dead serious, I will literally do anything to have you back again. You say it, you name it, I'll do it.

I want to make you happy.

I understand that this is not an immediate thing, I don't expect it to be. This is something that I believe can take some time and I do want you to take that time to think, remember, how our lives were then, how I want all of that again. I care about you so deeply, Artemis. If you want me to wait, I promise you I will wait, you are worth waiting an eternity for. If you want us to take it slow, we can take it slow, get re-accustomed to one another, talk, remember what we liked, what we were like. We all have our insecurities, the things that make us special and unique.. and you are beyond unique.

I feel better in writing this to you to get out the feelings i have. I don't blame you at all, it was never your fault for anything, you never did anything wrong in my eyes, I could never leave you for anything. We’ve been through much together.

Please enjoy the gifts I got for you. I don't know if you've got the latest Animal Crossing, I remember you loved that so much. I remember how you loved cherry blossoms too. The chocolates are from home, Haigh's in fact, best chocolate around. And the teddy, that's for you to keep you company at night, whatever happens. He loves you just as much as I love you, he hopes to make you happy, just as much as I want to.

The memories we share will be with me forever, how I want so many more in the future with you. Say the word and I will be your forever. You mean more than everything to me, you matter, your happiness, wellbeing matters. Everything about you matters to me.

If I have that second chance, to be yours again, I will cherish it, cherish you, with every waking moment, every second of my life. It will be the greatest gift I ever had, on par with the gift of your life entwined in mine that time ago. It was all so precious to me, you are precious to me.

I could say so much, I wish I could convey all of this in actions rather than words, hold you, never, ever let go.

Whatever happens, please be happy for me. I want your future to be bright and wonderful. All I wish for, is to have that future with you, for all of our days.

I’ve left my mobile at the end of the letter and I’m also staying at an apartment nearby, just going back and forth from there to my home, a complicated thing but let’s just say they’re connected in a certain way. It’s pretty close, should be in walking distance, just to enjoy the world for a while longer and reminisce. You’re welcome to come by any time, call, text me any time. Even if it’s 4AM I will gladly let you in, I guarantee you that.

I love you. I will always love you, my dearest Artemis, with all of my heart, from the deepest corners of my soul. Thank you for making memories with me that I will hold dear to me forever.

Eternally Yours,

Bowen Chuuno.

And at the end of the letter there was a mobile phone number and the address of where he was staying, giving her the opportunity to see him or talk to him, should she so choose.

#averageisms #IC : Investigation Underway

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aurorahartt · 7 years

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What: Lyanna has a surprise for Aurora--New Years just got a little better. Where: Rockerfeller Center When: December 31, 2016 - January 2, 2017

Lyanna: "I honestly don't understand the point. It's just an excuse to drink and make promises you have no intentions to keep." Lyanna muttered over the sound of her chopping up an orange. "And here I thought Princess Aurora unfroze your cold heart." Grant chuckled, knowing his friend was bitter about a lot of things. "Yeah well--" Lyanna's voice trailed off as she such on a piece of orange, Sasha lightly whimpering for one below her. She shook her head at the dog, knowing he would just spit it out before she went to go sit in her kitchen. "Lyanna look, New Year's Eve, cheesy or not, is about being with the ones you love and sharing your time with them. If you catch a plane now, you can be with her tomorrow." Glancing over at the calendar, Lyanna shrugged, even though she knew her friend couldn't see her. "I don't know Grant, we left things on good terms but I just feel... I don't know." Lyanna ran a hand through her head. They spent Christmas together which was good, but other than that, Lyanna didn't know where they stood. Or what if Aurora already had plans for the holiday? Though it would be nice to surprise her. "I'll think about it." She said before hanging up. The medical examiner chewed on her bottom lip as she looked at the photo of her and Aurora she had hanging up on her fridge. She missed her like crazy, and she was sure the feeling was mutual. Lyanna then grabbed her laptop and looked online for flights. She knew everything was probably booked, everyone would most likely be flying in the city for a holiday. The last seat left was a first class one and it left in an hour. There was no way she could make it. However, Lyanna's heart yearned so much for her lover that she made an impulse decision. Running upstairs, Lyanna packed her bag and then ran out the door. But not before calling her neighbor and making sure they would watch over Sasha. Making her way to the airport, Lyanna's hand nervously rested in her lap as she looked out the window. This was stupid, she shouldn't be doing this. She was a rational minded person. Still, love made people do crazy things, or so she thought. When she was finally all situated, making her flight at the last second possible, Lyanna closed her eyes and put her headphones in as she thought of all the scenes that could happen. Aurora could be with someone else, or she could be working, or she could be out. Lyanna wasn't sure, but she knew how she felt about the girl and the thought of kissing her at midnight made her weak. In the knees. The flight was long and strenuous, but Lyanna got there, around 2 in the morning, on the 30th. Checking into a hotel since she wasn't technically on the show and she still wanted to surprise Aurora, Lyanna plopped on the bed before glancing down at her phone. In the morning, she would see Aurora, for now sleep. When she finally woke, the dim sun peered in and she peeked over to the clock. Jet lag hit her hard. Running a hand through her hair, Lyanna took a shower and then prepared herself for the day ahead. Pressing Aurora's contact, Lyanna waited for the rings to end as she sat in her hotel room.

Aurora: Since leaving Lyanna back in Sweden Aurora felt rather down. It wasn't just that she was away from the girl, it was that she had no clue what all of this meant. The woman was not used to this sort of confusion, not used to being unsure of where she stood with her relationships. Since coming home she worked. Worked until she couldn't keep her eyes open. She slept at work, relaxed occasionally at the house when she was forced to leave the facility. And when she was at home the girls tried to talk to her, tried to get her to do things, to hang out and forget her bad feelings. But it was impossible to forget the woman on he other wise of the world. So aurora continued to distract herself. It was late evening on the 30th when her boss, Richard, walked in and closed Aurora's laptop slowly till it's kid brushed her fingers. "Go home. Have a good New Year's Eve and don't come back till the 2nd. You need a break. The stars will still be here when you get back." He said in a soothing voice. Aurora looked at him frowning at first. But then finally sighed and pulled her fingers from the laptop, and Richard shut it completely now. "Shoo. Go. Do something fun." He said. "Fine. But I'll be here first thing on the 2nd." She said and packed up. She had a two hour drive home from the institute. It wasn't that bad, just boring. She thought of calling Lyanna, but the time difference wasn't in her favor. So she turned the radio and sang along with songs. When she finally made it home she shot off a quick text to Lyanna, "I hope all is good there. I miss you." She sent--only for it to not send. Frowning she wondered what was wrong, but figured she'd try again later. It was the next day before she did. Stirring as the sun rose, and to the sound of a cute little ringtone. On the other line was Lyanna. Her heart fluttered and she took a breath before hitting the green button. "Hello?"

Lyanna: "Hi there," Lyanna said, her heart fluttering when she heard the other woman's voice. "I have a surprise for you. Sent all the way from Sweden." She teased, not wanting to ruin her surprise yet. "It's at Rockerfeller Plaza. Near the ice skating rink." The older brunette knew she had a lot to makeup for. Since they only spent about two days for Christmas, she wanted to do everything with Aurora. In fact, she wanted to spend the rest of her life with Aurora, but she was getting ahead of herself. "That is, if you're not busy you should go check it out. You won't regret it," she said in a promising tone.

Aurora: "Lyanna," she said, her voice soft, happy. "A surprise for me?" She asked, voice raising a bit in excitement. The idea of a present from Lyanna, no matter what it was, was exciting for the astronaut. "Rockerfeller plaza? What are you talking about?" She asked confused. Pushing herself up in her bed and rubbing her eyes she woke up more as they spoke, "yeah--I'll go check it out in a bit. You caught me just waking up. I'm a mess." She paused letting the sound of Lyanna's breathing sooth her. It reminded her of their time together, how she awoke in the middle of the night. Hearing Lyanna's breathing made her fall back to sleep that night. And like that night, hearing Lyanna made her want to cuddle the woman and fall asleep. "What is at Rockerfeller besides skating and the tree?" She asked confused. "You've piqued my curiosity." Aurora continued, standing up now and making her bed as best she could while holding the phone.

Lyanna: "Well, I guess you'll just have to find out." Lyanna said. "I didn't mean to wake you though, I always forget the time difference." She said before checking her clock. "It's about, late afternoon." She said with a nod. She had to keep the charade up. "I bet you look adorable. In fact, I know you look adorable when you wake up." She said, remembering their time together vividly. "Well I should go, but I'll let you figure it out. Call me when you get there, I'll direct you some more. I love you." Lyanna said before hanging up the phone. When she was done, Lyanna pulled on black skinny jeans, a white cashmere sweater and a long green coat. She matched the outfit with brown boots and a nice plaid scarf before she walked out of the hotel. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, Lyanna felt nervous, but more giddy as she thought of seeing Aurora again. Waiting near the ice rink, Lyanna looked around before taking a seat.

Aurora: Frowning at Lyanna's words she huffed. It was tiny, but cute. "Fine." She joked. "And I know you do." She laughed now, a smile on her lips and it was easy to hear in her voice. "You would think I was cute waking up, my hair a mess." She sighed. "Okay, I will." She was about to speak again when Lyanna spoke. As the phone hung up she sighed, "I love you too." She said setting the phone down. She quickly started to get ready, a shower then changing into a new sweater she got. Light pink turtleneck with 'cold sholders', black pants were quickly slipped on after and simple black shoes. Grabbing her thick black coat she scooped up her purse as well and made her way through the house. A cameraman tagging along with her, as they wound their way out of the house, down the road and to the metro. A bit later she found herself at Rockerfeller center. She frowned confused and pulled out her phone quickly ringing Lyanna.

Lyanna: "Hey there." Lyanna said, an anxious grin crossing her face. She had left momentarily to get them some hot coffee. She was surprised at the weather, how warm it seemed to be. Well, it wasn't warm, but it was much warmer than Sweden. "So, I'm guessing you're there." Lyanna then stood up and looked around, before spotting Aurora across the rink. Hiding herself behind a pole, Lyanna then glanced back to Aurora. "Okay, start walking, right." She said before coming out from behind the pole. "Okay, now stop right where you are, close your eyes and count to ten." She said, before hanging up. Sliding her phone in her pocket, Lyanna then made sure Aurora did as instructed and crept up behind her. "Hi," she whispered, before wrapping her arms around her. She didn't want to scare the girl, so that's why she talked, indicating who she was. "Turn around, I think you'll like this surprise." Lyanna whispered, placing a kiss on Aurora's ear. She then smiled, donning a large red bow on her coat. She got it from a holiday store and knew Aurora would think it was cute.

Aurora: "Hey," she said cheerfully, feeling much more awake now that she was in the middle of craziness. A shiver ran through her body, it would take a couple minutes in the cold to truly feel comfortable. "I am. Near the tree." She said looking around. "What am I looking for?" She asked her leather gloved hand pressing her phone to her face. She did what she was told waiting to see whatever it is Lyanna had set up. She knew it could be anything, sure Lyanna wasn't on the show, but the show was known to work with people to do surprises. "Fine..1..." the phone clicked off and she kept her eyes closed, "2..." shoved the phone into her pocket and continued to count. "9..." then Lyanna's voice broke her concentration then her arms. She couldn't stop the smile on her face, the happy tears that sprung to brown eyes. She turned and looked at Lyanna, "Lya...." she said chuckling. Seeing the bow she laughed more. "You are the best present I could ever get." She said clinging to the older woman. "When did you get here."

Lyanna: "I know, I'm pretty amazing." She said as she leaned in to kiss the woman. "Oh about yesterday, very very late. I didn't want to wake you so I stayed in a hotel." She said with a nod. "I missed you." The medical examiner whispered, hugging the girl happily. She held her tightly, just inhaling the scent of Aurora into her lungs so she could never forget. "I missed you so so much." She said again, knowing the words wouldn't do her feelings justice. "Come on, I have some warm coffee over there." She said before taking Aurora's hand and leading her to the bench where she was recently placed at. "Grant talked me into this. Plus, I just had to kiss you at midnight tonight. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I didn't. Because you Aurora, have become quite a constant in my life, and well, I'm hoping that this year and the next year after that, and the one after and the one after that. Well you get the point, for as long as you'll have me, we'll spend each year together." Lyanna whispered, her British accent coating the words.

Aurora: "That you are." Aurora said not wanting to let go of the woman. She laced her fingers behind Lyanna's back and held her. She returned the kiss quite happily. "You could have woken me--I wouldn't have cared one bit." Aurora said looking her in the eyes. Seeing Lyanna back in New York made her happier than she could explain. "I missed you too." She said softly. Burying her face into Lyanna's shoulder and hair. It felt good to be held by her, to know she had the woman she loved in her arms. "You got me coffee too? That's it. You have no choice now." She said chuckling. "You're stuck with me for life." Given, in Aurora's mind Lyanna was the only choice, but it was the little things, like getting her coffee that made her realize how perfect Lyanna was. She followed her happily, and took the coffee. "I'll have to thank Grant." She said with a little nod. But when Lyanna spoke about the future she felt not just her cheeks redden, but her face, "I want nothing more than to spend every New Years with you." She said softly. "I would like nothing more than to call you mine." She said softly her face pink from embarrassment and from the cold.

Lyanna: "At two in the morning? After I knew you had worked yourself to the brink of your boss probably telling you to go home for the holiday? I don't think so." She said. Last night, Lyanna was so groggy from the plane she contemplated on sneaking into the house and just climbing into Aurora's bed, but that would go wrong so many ways. So she settled for a hotel room. "I know you Aurora," she said rolling her eyes at the girl's work ethic. It was something she both admired and worried about. Not that she was much different, she knew she worked way more than she should. "You're adorable, do you know that?" Lyanna commented, watching her lover's reaction. She said closer, and inward so their knees were touching, trying to huddle from the cold. She then placed an eskimo kiss upon Aurora's cheek, her nose nuzzling into the reddened skin. "I am yours Aurora, every part of me is yours, for as long as you want it." She whispered. And somewhere deep down, she knew that even if Aurora didn't want her in the future, a part of her would always be Aurora's. "I missed you princess, I missed this. Just being near you," Lyanna said before looking over to Aurora. She knew Aurora was joking about the stuck with me for life thing, but Lyanna wouldn't mind if it was true, not int he least bit. "You're my lobster." The examiner commented, a slight chuckle escaping her pink lips. So the TV in her hotel room only showed old reruns of 90 shows. Friends happened to be one of them. She wasn't particularly fond of the show, but it was cute.

Aurora: Aurora laughed at the woman's words. "You act as if I'm never awake at that hour." She smirked, 2am is a normal time for her, hell it was one of the best times to see the stars. "But, you're not wrong. He did send me home for the holiday. Told me to to relax." She said smiling, "now I'm glad he did. Otherwise I would have been three hours away at the center." She said. She felt her cheeks staying warm at the fact that Lyanna DID know her that well. Not many people did: and it msd her jelly to know the one person she loved more than anything knew her so well. "I am not that cute." She said softly, "but thank you." She added a moment later. Feeling the warmth from the others body, their knees touching, she couldn't stop the smile. She had missed being this close. "I don't plan on letting it go then." She said softly, almost a hushed whisper. It was hearing the word princess that caught her off guard. Eyebrows furrowed and she made a confused face. "Princess?" She said a smile tugging at the corner of her lips "I missed you too though. So very much. It's nice knowing you're here...that I can--" she reached out and touched her cheek. She lingered for a moment before pulling her into a kiss. "If I'm your lobster, then you're mine." She said squeezing Lyanna's hand with her other.

Lyanna: "You're right. I wish you were never awake at that hour. But I can't really chide you, you know I'm usually up at that hour too, pouring over case files." The Swede responded, rolling her eyes at her own foolishness. "A couple of workaholics are we. We make a great pair." In fact, Aurora's dedication to her job was one of the things Lyanna adored about her. Not only was she amazing at her job, but she also kept long hours and didn't complain when Lyanna had to cancel or work late. She didn't try and make a habit of doing either, since she didn't want to take advantage of Aurora, but she knew the girl understood. It's like she was finally dating an adult. "Well now you can. We have the whole weekend." She said with a nod. And maybe, if Aurora convinced her, she'd stay even later. "Lucky for me you are here. But you know I would've gotten into a car and driven to you anyways." She responded. "Yes, you are that cute. You're incredibly adorable yet wildly sexy." Lyanna whispered, her lips close to Aurora's ears so hopefully the microphones didn't catch it. Some things she just wanted to be theirs. "Now come on, I got us both a pair of skates!" Lyanna said, holding up the ticket stub. "Us Swedes are pretty good on ice." She teased, taking Aurora's hand and guiding her to the bottom of the staircase. "Princess Aurora. I honestly had no idea there was such a person, but apparently she was in Sleeping Beauty." Lyanna didn't grow up watching these movies, nor did she have any kids of her own, so she couldn't possibly know. She liked movies with substance, ones that really made her think. "That you can?" Lyanna asked, a longing in her eyes for Aurora to finishing her sentence. "Kiss me?" She whispered, soon after they pulled apart. "I'm real, I'm here. I'm yours." She whispered. "Always," Lyanna uttered before walking up to the skate rental place and handing the man their ticket.

Aurora: Smiling brightly at the woman she chuckled, "I wish you weren't either." She said softly, her hands brushing Lyanna's lovingly. "At least we're up together." Aurora continued. She nodded. "That we do." the astronaut said smiling. She enjoyed that they both were night owls--both hard workers, it made for easy nights when one or the other had to work. And now that they were talking long term--she looked forward to more late nights with the other woman. Nights where they could sit next to one another on the sofa doing their work feet touching small smiles dancing on lips...She let out a happy sigh at the thoughts. "Yes!" She said cheerfully, "I'm so excited about the idea that we get a whole weekend together." She said. "Though, I may not let you go come Sunday." She said quietly. "You would have driven to me?" She said eyebrows raising. "That's so sweet." She said smiling brightly. When Lyanna leaned closer to her and whispered a shiver rose over her spine from the closeness and her face turned red from the words. "I am--not." she said stuttering over it. "Yes, Princess Aurora from Sleeping Beauty--thats who everyone thinks I'm named after." She said shaking her head. "But yes, that I can kiss you. Kissing you is one of the many things I missed way to much." Aurora said pressing a kiss to the girls lips again. "I'm glad you are. I don't think I'm gonna be able to let you go this time." She said in a hushed tone. When, Lyanna leaned back suddenly and holding up tickets, made Aurora laugh. "I'm horrible on the ice. I'm going to fall and bust my butt." She said standing up holding onto Lyanna's arm.

Lyanna: "On opposite sides of the world," Lyanna mused aloud. On the nights that were particularly dreadful and Aurora was not at arms length, the medical examiner found herself writing. Just notes to the woman she loved. They detailed everything, love, life, sometimes just random thoughts that popped them into her head. She would probably never send them, something stopping her every time she came close to the mailbox. Probably because each letter contained a fraction of her soul, because for Aurora she would bare it all. Every piece of herself, she would surrender to be apart of Aurora. The older brunette longed for the day when she would wake up on the couch, case files surrounding her, a dim light coming from the study. She would walk in groggily and she her girlfriend sitting there, pouring over the dozens of charts that calculated the stars. And Lyanna would just wrap her arms around Aurora's waist and pull her to bed, knowing they both needed sleep. The thoughts, as mundane as they were, made her happy. "Darling, I don't care if I would have to walk to you. It would be worth it." Lyanna said. As cheesy and romantic as that sounded, it was true. "Well if you fall on your butt, I will of course laugh and then help you up." Getting their skates, Lyanna then sat on a bench and started to take off her boots.

Aurora: "To far." She said in a hushed whisper at the thought of them being on other sides of the world most of the time. It was a depressing thought to the young woman. While she was horribly passionate about her career the only other thing she really craved in her life was the stability that was offered from being with someone. She knew it sounded a bit crazy, but when she had been engaged to Barry she found great comfort in knowing she had someone to come home to every day, and when she met Lyanna--she came to hope that the woman would become that constant in her life. A small smile danced on her lips as she looked at Lyanna, "So you'd walk a thousand miles?" she said in a bit of a sing song voice, her nose srunching as she chuckled at herself. "At least you'll help me." She said, taking her skates and sitting down to slip them on. She was horrid at ice skating, but she knew Lyanna liked it, and she wanted to do, well--at least okay, for the other woman. Once her skates were on she looked nervously to the rink then back to Lyanna. "Just don't hate me if I curse this in a few minutes." She said.

Lyanna: When Aurora said that, a silent twinge in the medical examiner's stomach churned. She never wanted to be that far from Aurora, not even after the girl left college. She knew it was her own demons she was battling, but she was doing it for them. Because she wanted to come home to Aurora when she was open and ready. Those things took time. Lyanna had been improving her life, not spending so much time in the morgue, seeking professional help such as therapy. It felt weird to her at first, talking to a random stranger who knew nothing about you. Telling them intimate details about your life and then having them tell you what other people are thinking, like her parents, when her therapist didn't even know them. But it was worth it, it helped put things in perspective. Lyanna bit her lip as she heard the girl's singing voice. "Except, just to be the woman who walks for you." She hummed backed. Gliding out onto the ice effortlessly, Lyanna looked back at Aurora and smiled. "You're going to be fine. Remember, if you fall, I'll catch you. Always." Lyanna said, coming up behind her lover and steadying her.

Aurora: Aurora didn't think much about what she said, she just missed the other woman, and wanted to make it known. She only hoped that Lyanna was feeling better, getting better. A small smile on her lips as she watched Lyanna move to the ice. She looked so graceful on the ice, how she moved, everything about Lyanna on ice was whimsical. She smiled. "I'm holding you to that." She said as she clung to Lyanna's jacket and stepped onto the ice. Scared that she was going to fall and hurt herself on the ice. "How do you do this without slipping." She muttered as she lost her balance a bit and clung harder to the woman. She pushed herself up straight and huffed.

#we sorta just stopped sooo

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amandakayexplainsitall · 6 years

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12/2/2017 6:55 AM

I’ve been caught up in a lot of emotions recently. And as far as I can tell there isn’t one stronger then another which leaves me feeling all sorts of emotionally exhausted. First and foremost life is grand, this is one of the most wonderful periods of my life thus far.

My husband and I are in a HOME! We’re renting it but still we are in a three bedroom house with a basement and a backyard for our dog and I feel like an actual human being for once instead of an afterthought. Though acquiring it was unconventional and unexpected just having the house has given us room to breathe and relax a bit.

I‘m working in the field of my dreams doing something that’s as close as you can get to my actual dream job and they’ve asked me to go full-time! That means benefits health insurance the whole 9 yards. I’ve been so happy yet at the same time extremely nervous, as this is something I’ve never done before. I’m constantly having anxiety over if I’m performing my job as well as my superiors would hope or if I’m just in the way. I desperately want to find success in this field and at this job.

School is overwhelming. I have never been more proud of myself but I’ve also never been more disappointed in myself. School is pressure it’s hard work. But school is also a future promise of a better life. Or at least I’m hoping so. Admittedly I’ve dropped out of more classes than I would like to admit this semester. Though I do have to say dropping out is far better than failing a class at this point in my life. I believe I can still finish out the semester strong and at the very least not harm my GPA too bad. But I’m ready to slow down I’m not ready to stop but I’m ready to slow down. Life has taken my husband and I and places we really didn’t think we would be and now that we’re here I’m starting to wonder what my next steps should truly be. Because I still have that chance, I can change my mind if I want to. Just because I have a plan doesn’t mean I fail if those plans change. And for once I’m OK with that.

My husband has gotten a new job and has been promoted already at this new job to a salary wage position! This has never happened before! For either of us. This is another wonderful exciting achievement that has impacted our lives SO MUCH for the better. For the past four years of our marriage we’ve been significantly underneath the poverty level and this new opportunity actually puts us in a tax bracket. Something that almost didn’t seem achievable for a long time for us. So our financial situation finally feels less stressful. But if I’m being honest I am also petrified that somehow my husband will lose the job. After getting this kind of stress relief all I can worry about is going back to where we were before.

Baby fever has officially hit. I’ve always wanted kids and a family and all of that. That’s the way I was raised. And I used to want one far more when I was far too young to even be thinking about one. Luckily I learned to pack that feeling away and for the better part of a decade I’ve been able to not think or want anything to do with babies besides you know being a daycare provider and everything. But it has hit. The baby fever is real and it I have a yearning for it like I can’t explain. I believe part of it has been brought on from watching friends get pregnant and bring a child into the world as well as watching my best friend find out she was pregnant becoming over the moon excited only to be holding her hand while she miscarried twins. This is been a point of argument between my husband and I but it is turned into a point of understanding. I believe my husband truly knows me and understands that this is something I’ve always wanted and now a few years away from 30 is something I can’t stop thinking about. It’s not something we’re acting on immediately but it is something my husband has told me point blank “I see your yearning and your pain and I want to give you what you’re looking for“ and that has meant the world to me. He has promised within the next year we can actually start trying. ❤️

The relationship with most of my in-laws has always been a strained one. It hasn’t been an easy relationship to maintain nor has it been easy on my feelings or emotions. I’ve always wanted to have a wonderful close relationship with them but I’ve been met with a lot of resistance and quite frankly hate. But for at least the past few years I have learned how to navigate family get togethers. Which basically means I show up and don’t say shit and eventually leave. I’ve learned not to invest myself in the situations or people who make me feel hard to love or be around. But this year something has changed because at the last get together it was wonderful. It was actually enjoyable! My in-laws who routinely acknowledge my husband yet ignore me when I walk into the room actually held conversations with me. There was actually a feeling of a family atmosphere at the gathering. I know my husband appreciated it, to be honest I think he actually needed it. I think your relationships with your family have a ton to do with your own self worth and self confidence and I’m sure my husband’s has suffered because of our relationships with his family. Plus on the selfish side of things I really mean it when I say all I’ve ever wanted was a good relationship with his family. But I’m scared. I’m really nervous. The last thing I want is to let my guard down thinking they have changed and we can be a family only to have them treat me the same way that they did and have to look myself in the mirror and think “You fucking told yourself”. To think I could be that stupid to let my guard down after the way I have been treated and the things have been said to me. But I also know when it comes to his family structure versus my family structure I was blessed. He had a horrible family situation growing up and because of that most of his family just doesn’t get it. I know I have to be the adult and I will always have to be the adult if I ever want an actual relationship because they don’t know how to be. So I’m scared I’m nervous I’m hopeful and God I just want things to work out all right this time around.

I feel at odds with many of my friends right now. I’m not really sure if it’s something that they’ve done nor I’ve done or what the situation is or maybe it’s just school and work and my own personal issues that have me feeling a distance between them and I. My best friends will always be my best friends and I know a lot of this is probably just stuff that will pass. But my best friend has really hurt my feelings and made me feel used. I know there are events in life that hit us and affect us and part of me wonders if recent events are making my friend unaware of how I’m being treated or if it’s simple selfishness. But if you were only going to call me to get things from me or have me do things for you it doesn’t really feel like a friendship it just feels like I’m nothing to you. Nothing but free service and free stuff. Because you know I’m generous and concerned and basically I can’t help myself when it comes to helping others. Maybe I need to just go out tonight and shake that feeling off…

Decembers just started but it feels like Christmas is right around the corner. I’ve noticed from year to year there are moments I just don’t feel like it I don’t feel like doing holidays and then there are moments where I am the Holliest jolliest motherfucker you’ve ever seen. This year is one of those years. I put my tree up on November 1. Yeah you read that right a month ago I put my tree up. But I really think there’s something about being at a home for the first time with my husband just makes me so damn happy especially around this time year. But I’m excited, I’m ready for Christmas. I’m ready for that Christmas cheer. I’m ready for family and friends and gathering and food and drinks and memories and cold nights with a warm blanket and my husband and eyes feats tangled together with our puppy cuddled up right next to us.

This feels like a warm winter.❄️❤️

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