Why Don’t We Love The New Polyamory Flag?

I’m going to keep this brief because no one needs a lecture.

It was claimed that “polyamorous people voted” and this was “the word of the community” and yet no one seemed to know this vote existed or was taking place?

In the argument of “well this one is better on the eyes” there have already been designs keeping the original themes that solve that issue.

It removes some of the history attached to the original flag, history that no one seems to care about anymore. Even if you think that the pi symbol is stupid, there have been versions made with the infinity heart, a universally recognized symbol of polyamory.

The flag is very hard to recreate in many designs. As someone who makes pride bracelets, it’s very easy to recognize the blue, red, and black. This flag is harder to recreate.

It’s been said that the colors are easily mixed up with the bisexual flag or the androgynous flag, and removes that iconic individuality that the polyam flag colors have.

This isn’t me saying it’s ugly or that criticisms of the original flag aren’t valid. I’m not here to point fingers and say that it’s “problematic” and that “we need to stop using it”. I’m not even here to cry about how annoying it is that everyone calls the original flag ugly when someone of us actually like it and how tiring that negativity gets to be to hear a piece of art you like trashed. I’m simply here to say that this is NOT the new universal flag, and according to a poll *I* put out on tumblr, 60% of people reject the new flag. What you have is two camps of people, one camp that voted this new flag into existence as the majority of people in some mysterious poll and those who support this decision, and another group that has worked to keep the original flag in tact and/or has an issue with the unconventional design of the new one. At least here on tumblr you’ll find a lot of the big polyamory blogs like @polyamorouscultureis @polyamoryfacts @polyamorousmood @polyshipprompts @polyamory4life @polyamory-ponderings @polyamory-place @polyamory-imagines and so many more still using some version of the original flag. It’s not going anywhere, and I wish people would stop acting like we all threw it in the garbage.

tired of arguing over which flag is most inclusive of trans ppl when the answer has been obvious all along.

the green stripe is for the money that cis people give trans people so we can pursue transition, the white stripe is for the whipped cream, and the red is for the blood of our enemies.

“Masc presenting amab enbies cant use the t slur” “Bi women cant reclaim the d slur” “trans men saying they hate femininity is misogynistic” “neopronouns are baaaaaad actually” “the toothpaste flag is appropriative and a recolor of the lesbian flag” what if i hit you with a truck. What then.

tumblr making the colors of the gay tag the ocean gay flag is one of the hardest fuck yous to toothpaste flag haters ive ever seen. i hope twitter users saw it and cried

“The gay flag copies the lesbian flag !!!!🥺🥺🥺” mfs when the ocean flag was based on the toothpaste flag which was based on the sunset flag which was based on the lipstick (+ butch) flag which was based on the cougar flag which was based on the bear flag which was based on the leather flag which was based on the Gilbert baker flag

No more flag discourse these are superior

ripped this off pinterest cause i think these flag discourse idiots should take a look at this (don’t mind that this is mlp)

I remember in the beginning when I first got on here on Tumblr, I would see a lot of discourse around the sunset aroace flag and such, people saying that the flag is offensive to use because the creator of the flag is an exclusionist???? I think??? It's been awhile since I've last seen discourse on the flag so I could be misremembering. And as a baby aroace, I was confused and terrified, I wasn't sure if I should continue supporting the sunset aroace flag or not.

Just an early memory/ experience I had within the community I wanted to share.

Oh god yes, the discourse around this bloody flag.... Alright lesson time!

The main issue a lot of people have with MANY pride flags is the problematic actions of their creators. A reminder that just because the persons actions are questionable, does not mean we throw out the whole flag and in some fucked up cases the sexuality.

If we go down that route we end up throwing away a lot of flags, including flags like the Pan flag (most well know one, pink-yellow-cyan) The Gay man flag (green-light green-white-light blue- blue), basically every polyamory flag has some drama around it and even the iconic bisexual flag and well known lesbian flag aren't safe from this.

Bottom line is; its stupid as fuck. It doesn't matter and it tears the community apart for no reason. If you have the energy to fight about fags you have the energy to fight about real-world issues.

In case you didn't know, Emily Gwen — the creator of the 'sunset' lesbian flag — is mspec lesbian exclusionary. This isn't a call to stop using the flag; I hate flag discourse, and believe that if you like and feel represented by a flag, you should use it. However, I felt it necessary to make this post, so I did.

Its frankly tiring being part of two subsections of the LGBTQ+ community that are some of the most spoken over because of the privilege the other parts think we have. 

transandrophobia is real. Trans men talking about the transphobia we face doesn’t affect the visibility of transfemmes. Its not a pie, and saying we should shut up for the benefit of trans women is just silencing us which is, you guessed it. Transphobic. Most of the time, we don’t even bring up transfemmes when we talk about our oppression. Stop making it about them. Its not about them.

Let gay men have things. Let them have their labels, let them have their flags. If you think the ocean flag is problematic because its a copy, then you are going to be devastated when I tell you about what inspired the original lesbian flag. If you think it has no meaning, I would be happy to correct you. If you think it just reinforces pink=girl, blue=boy, then you are going to be devastated x2 when I tell you about what the colors on the trans flag represent. If you think it shouldn’t be used because the original was made by a problematic person, even after the Ocean flag has moved away from said person, you are going to be devastated x3 when I tell you about the lesbian flag.

Plus. Its just a word. Its just a color pallet on a cloth. trying to scold us for making a word up for our oppression isn’t going to stop us from being oppressed, its just going to silence us. Scolding us for making a flag you think is problematic isn’t going to stop us from being part of the community, its just going to make us feel isolated and upset that we don’t have our own symbols of pride without being yelled at every five minutes.

I’m a proud trans gay man. I’m going to keep talking about transandrophobia. I’m going to keep using the ocean flag because I think it looks pretty and I like having something of my own. I’m going to keep on using these things, so you can either learn to live with me, or just leave me alone

Why I ( as a Romani person) Hate the Labrys flag.

This info graphic describes the following; the meaning of the flag and incorrect use of symbols, use of facist symbols, the flags resemblance to Ordine Nuovos flag, The harm and commodifying of the death of Romani, Sinti, and Jewing people( heavy focused on the Romani aspect thought) and why its an issue.

Thank you for reading, reblogs encouraged!

Option 1

Option 2

🏳️‍🌈HERE’S YOUR GUIDE TO PRIDE FLAG DISCOURSE THIS PRIDE MONTH 🏳️‍🌈

So, I’m going to callout some people for using these problematic flags-

Now that I have your attention, Angel Maxine is Ghana’s first openly trans musician, and she could use some support! 🏳️‍⚧️💕

If you have time for flag discourse, you have time to boost and support fellow LGBTQ people.

I thought I’d share my thoughts on this one, because DEAR LORD, is this a subject…

In my honest opinion, Flag Discourse is completely and utterly stupid, and half of it is just speaking over certain groups. There are real-world issues affecting queer folks that are leagues more important than if xyz flag is “problematic” or whatnot. Yes, there are some legitimately problematic flags, such as the Labrys, but I’m not talking about those. What I’m talking about is stuff like the debacles with the “toothpaste” flag, pan flag, etc.. Speaking of toothpaste, as a lesbian, WE SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN ALLOWED TO SPEAK ON THAT. OH MY GOD, were mlm spoken over to the high heavens on that one. (Fun fact: when I called out a bunch of twitter users for speaking over mlm about this discourse, they asked if I was mlm, which THEY WEREN’T EITHER.) In my honest opinion, I would much rather focus on the worsening discrimination against us worldwide than if a gay person’s flag “copies” my own.

(Image ID: Several flags of many colors and symbols on a white background. Above the flags is a thin green checkmark and bold black text that reads "Which pride flag should I use?". Below the flags is more bold black text in all caps, which reads "WHICHEVER FLAG YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE USING!". Below that is smaller text which reads "Because flag discourse is fucking stupid and is just thinly veiled queermisia at this point". End ID). Used the lesbian flags. pan flag, polyamory flags, aroace flag, bigender flags and the gay flags because those have the most discourse around them. Though I included the rainbow flags as well since there's like multiple of them and there's unfortunately a lot of discourse around them too (No joke, a few years ago I saw someone claim the Philadelphia pride flag, the rainbow flag with the black and brown stripes on top, was disrespectful to POC and AIDS victims???) Before anyone comes at me with "But the creator of this flag is problematic" or "But this flag copies that flag". One, just because the creator is problematic DOESN'T MEAN THE FLAG ITSELF IS PROBLEMATIC. Also, even if the flag was problematic, yall know that people can reclaim pride flags right? Second, each pride flag is a copy of one another lmfao. If we had no copies, there wouldn't be pride flags at all. And yes, I am going to say it: Telling people which pride flags they shouldn't use is just thinly veiled queermisia at this point. :/

I want to talk about MLM flag discourse.

It pisses me off so much how the people who are most vocal about this issue are non-MLM, and they are high key very homophobic in their arguments. Non-MLM can reblog this post as long as you don't start shit. I only care about opinions from our own community about this discourse. Period.

Let's start with the only valid criticism of the usage of the green, white, and blue MLM flag: the idea that it's just a recolored lesbian flag, and that this "fact" must make the flag design lesbophobic. If we were to use this argument, we would actually need to call the lesbian flag problematic for being a recolored MLM flag; the MLM flag came first.

The modern lesbian flag was created in 2018 (source) whilst the MLM flag was made in 2016 (source). Is the modern lesbian flag then homophobic? No! I support MLM WLW solidarity, and the lesbian flag has meanings for each color just like the MLM flag does. This is really a non-issue, guys. Unfortunately people in the queer community like to start shit for no reason.

Now, I absolutely support the right of any MLM to not use this flag, whether it be because of this, because they think it's ugly, or for any other reason. However, what I do not support is non-MLM, without being asked for their opinion, saying that this flag is ugly and should not be used. I will repeat what I said from earlier louder for the folks in the back, if you are not MLM you cannot speak on this discourse and have no place to be calling our flags ugly.

We have gone full circle back to being incredibly homophobic. Why is it that whenever we have words and community to ourselves, other queer people believe it is for them? If you are not MLM you can have solidarity with us but you cannot speak on our discourse, even if you are also queer. It is incredibly homophobic for non-MLM to say things like that, even to advocate for the MLM flag to be removed from queer art and other visuals.

Unfortunately, these are all talking points that I have seen people bring up, and it needs to stop.

It is a matter of personal preference whether you choose to use this flag or not, but if you choose not to use it, please don't be homophobic to others because they do use it.