#first words out of my mouth were what the fuck are you so cheery about KDHDKDDH
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morning people are so fucking scary. rolling over and seeing good morning 😁😁😁😁 is such a jumpscare
#first words out of my mouth were what the fuck are you so cheery about KDHDKDDH#‘it’s morning and you’re here’ 🙄🙄🙄 that’s so sweet but i still don’t believe that people live like this
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the neighborhood keeps getting smaller
joel miller x reader
cw: 18+ MINORS DNI, p in v sex, joel has a big dick, breeding kink, size kink, pet names, MATING PRESS BRRR, slight dumbification, unprotected sex (wrap it up kids don’t be dumb)
can be read as a sequel to hold me across state lines
you and joel have been going slow whether you like it or not, you finally get a chance to spend some together when ellie is out for the night….
ellie had caught on pretty quickly that things had changed between you two. in fact the next morning at breakfast she blurted out, “you guys are fucking aren’t you?”
“oh my god ellie.” you clutched your head with your hands, elbows on the table as you felt a headache incoming. joel grumbled next to you and ellie almost gagged at his cheeks coloring pink. i mean, could you even blame her? you woke up this morning dredging into the kitchen in only what appeared to be joel’s shirt, looking around like a lost puppy until you met his eyes. joel wasn’t any better, his jaw dropped a little bit and his eyes swept over you quickly. ellie didn’t even hold back an eye roll; it wasn't like you two were paying her any attention anyways. you couldn’t raise your head and look the teenager in the eyes, you’d let joel handle this one. besides it wasn’t like you two had fucked you’d just gotten more intimate than two platonic partners ever did.
“ellie, first of all don’t talk like that especially when we’re eating, secondly we’re taking it slow and when we’re ready to tell you anything we’ll let you know.” joel’s tone, although gruff and stern, soothed your nerves. this wasn’t a one time thing and he was making it clear to both of you in that moment. when you woke up from the deepest sleep you’d had in a while you expected him to be next to you, so when you wandered into the kitchen this morning you needed comfort, you needed confirmation.
“okay fine but it’s not like it’s a surprise to anyone. the whole town thought you guys were practically married.” with that ellie scarfed down her remaining pancake and took her plate to the sink. you looked up at joel who looked equally confused as you were. were you both such fools? it seemed you two were the last to know. you waited until you could hear ellie stomp all the way upstairs and close her bedroom door behind her.
“God how am i gonna look her in the eyes?” you were a motherly figure to the girl, you felt mortified just thinking about facing her again.
“it’s fine, clearly the whole town was thinking it anyways.” joel had to admit he felt a sick thrill knowing the whole town thought you were his. it certainly explained why none of the younger eligible bachelors who snuck glances at you, but dared to approach you. he had likened it to his glaring, but clearly it was something more.
“jesus christ, they were, weren't they?” you scoffed and couldn’t help but take in joel’s appearance. he looked well-rested and as cheery as joel miller possibly could be. no wonder ellie had suspected something. “uhm joel.” joel didn’t think he could hear his name come out of your mouth without picturing you laid out for him, arched in pleasure and crying out his name like it was the only word you knew.
his mind stopped working for a moment as he looked at your messy hair and swollen eyes, and then he responded realizing he could only stare at you so long. a simple hum from him caused you to shiver as you scouted to the edge of your seat, your bare thigh brushing against his denim one.
“did you mean it when you said we’re taking things slow?” joel’s gaze traveled from your dilated pupils to your parted lips and found their home in your flushed cheeks. he wanted nothing more than to clear the table and cap off his meal with the dessert between your legs, but he wanted to know what you wanted. this was his last way to give you an out, to let you get ready of him easy. so it was only natural when he spoke next. your wide pretty eyes were clinging onto his every word as soon as his mouth opened and he itched to pull you close and kiss the air from your lungs.
“it’s up to you darling.” his voice was deep as he ground out his words. darling. with his southern drawl and your proclivity to find every word the man said to be sensual, you couldn’t even hide the chill that traveled down your spine. you were absolutely dazed as you swung your leg over his thighs and settled onto his lap. you barely fit in the space between him and the table but you didn’t care, you’d nestle in between his ribs if he let you. joel’s eyes took you in like you were the only thing in the world, studying your features and the pretty flush on your skin that seemed to go with him wherever he went. he wished he hadn’t wasted so much time with you.
“if you keep calling me darling, we’ll have to continue where we left off last night.” you leaned forward, whispering it into his good ear. joel could feel his blood traveling south, you sure knew how to make him feel young. fortunately, you were not quite on his bulge, otherwise he’s not sure either of you would be talking much longer. joel had his hands on your waist, he’d done it purposefully because if they went any south he’d have to find out just how south he could travel without you stopping him. he’d bet it was as much as he wanted.
“is that all it takes? pretty girl like you probably heard things like that often.” joel can imagine men and women alike throwing themselves at your feet. you were so damn gorgeous and good he felt like he’d won the lottery. a deep grumble resounded from your chest at his pet name once again, you’d let him do anything to you if he kept sweetening you up.
“don’t you know i’m gone for you miller?” you were slowly blinking, sleep still in your eyes and joel thought he felt his heart skip a beat. you looked like an angel sent just for him, he didn’t deserve an angel.
“i’m starting to pick up on that.” if you were far gone, joel was off the deep end.
“hmm well, it’s just you, no one else affects me like this.” you moved closer, your arms looped around his neck tightening. you could almost feel his bulge and joel had to groan as he felt his self-control slip. you smelled so good, like sex and honeysuckle. joel pressed a kiss to your forehead, you melted into him a little bit more.
“that makes us two of us sweetheart, but we should probably wait for when ellie’s not here.” he was warning you, trying to stop what was coming as he saw your eyes darken, your breathing picking up as your breast pressed into his chest.
“i can be quiet.” you were gonna be the death of him.
“tempting, but i’d rather hear you yell my name like you’ve gotten so fucking good at.” a small little smile painted your lips and joel fell a little more in love. instead of being shy, you seemed proud of yourself, like his name was made for you to scream.
“alright but go around calling me sweetheart, i might just crack.” you pressed a kiss to his cheek, your soft lips grazing against his rough beard, as you swung your leg back over and gave joel a good glimpse at your underwear.
it did nothing to help his hard-on.
since that breakfast with ellie you both had been good, stealing kisses when you could. the next night you both fell asleep with joel holding you close, just like you always did. but there was something simmering in both of you, you could feel it travel between your thighs and remain unattended. you three were having dinner at the community hall, when a girl ellie’s age asked her to watch a movie. you’d seen the girl hanging around ellie before, knew she was close with her as much as one could get to the wary teenager. “finish your dinner hon, then you can go do whatever you want.”
“is it okay if ellie sleeps over? the movie will end late.” you exchanged a look with joel, you weren’t giving up your kid that easily. you moved to stand up, the girl a little intimidated by you. you wondered if she’d start crying if joel had taken this one.
softening your expression slightly you asked, “where’s your parents?” the girl pointed in the direction of two people standing in line for food, ellie groaned in embarrassment and you ruffled her hair to tease her a bit more. it felt so plainly familiar that you thought about all the times you’d do the same with your little sister. joel couldn’t help but feel a shudder at the way you treated ellie, you always were so warm with her and he wished he could do it as easily as you did. ellie saw you as a mother, there was no doubt in his mind about that. you moved towards the couple with the girl following you. the couple was painfully normal and sweet, they seemed so well-adjusted you wondered if they’d ever even seen a clicker. despite your slight disdain for their blissful ignorance you couldn’t deny that they seemed perfectly normal and harmless. it also didn’t hurt that you were sure your ellie could take them any day of the week. with that you nodded at the parents and told the girl that ellie would find her after dinner. walking back to the table you found joel’s gaze on you, a look in his eye you couldn’t quite comprehend.
dinner passed by and joel and you said goodbye to ellie, telling her to be kind but not to hesitate to leave if she feels unsafe. it was the first night you’d spent apart since you joined them.
joel took your hand in his as you walked to the edge of town and made your way to your condo. you were surprised by his touch but welcomed it nonetheless, with joel you’d take whatever he gave you. “you think ellie’s okay right now?”
“just thinking about that myself actually.” you knew joel was as worried about her as you were. he didn’t let on just how much he worried but you knew, you could tell from the permanent frown had gotten deeper.
“we can swing by their place, i already asked maria for their address.” you and joel could probably break in and check on her but that would be a bit extreme even for you two.
“of course you did.” joel shot you a smirk, making your heart beat pick up. you both entered the home and you kicked off your boots, throwing off your jacket and hanging it up. you watched as joel did the same, taking in his broad chest that stretched against his shirt as he took off his jacket. you could watch him all day.
“gonna hop in the shower darlin’.” you nodded, slightly in a daze, following joel like a puppy as he walked towards your shared bedroom.
“can i join you?” joel pressed a kiss to your lips as he grabbed a towel and opened the bathroom door. you shivered at the feeling of his hot breath against your lips.
“how bout you just sit pretty and wait for me hm?” he motioned towards the bed and you nodded eagerly, joel found your enthusiasm maddening. he wanted you just as badly but he’d rather take you in the bed, it was the least you deserved. meanwhile you didn’t care where you were with him, as long as you could have him. after what felt like the longest 5 minutes of your life, the bathroom door cracked open, to reveal joel in only a towel around his waist. you didn’t even think twice before you padded over only in socks and one of joel’s shirts. your eyes widened as you outstretched a hand to feel the graying chest hair and maddening small gut surrounded by strong muscles. joel watched you wordlessly as your eyes narrowed at scars he’d gained over the years, your small hand inspecting and feeling whatever you could. joel felt something swell in his chest as you eyed him down, there was no hesitation in you to reach out for him. when you finally seemed satisfying joel stepped to the side so he could at least pull on a pair of boxers. your eyes never left him and joel could’ve laughed at how hungry you were for him if his mouth wasn’t salivating at the sight of your hard nipples through his fucking t-shirt.
joel toweled his hair dry, watching you as you continued to ogle him. he wasn’t any better, in the few seconds he wasn’t looking at your eyes he was taking in your curves or how he didn’t want you in anything other than his clothes. it was just as sexy as the suggestion of fabric you’d worn as lingerie before.
“come here darlin’,” you blushed instantly, moving towards him as he threw the towel to the side. your hands came up to smooth his hair down, it looked wild and you wanted to mess it for yourself later on. you raked a hand through his hair, your fingernails scraping his scalp, and joel let out a content grumble. your pussy clenched around air from the sound, you were exposed under this shirt, cool air making it clear to you how wet you were already getting. joel’s hands came up to your hips, squeezing and earning a gasp from your lips as your hands cupped his face. he pulled you closer, leaning down as he pressed a kiss to your lips, his tongue trailing the seam of your lips and you moaned out his name in response. “bed, now.” you wasted no time in backpedaling with joel’s hands still on your hips, not even breaking eye contact as you sighed out in content. when the back of your knees hit the bedframe, joel lifted you over it and dropped you onto the bed like you weighed nothing. you almost let out another whimper. joel climbed over you, his thighs caging you in as he sat up and raked over you.
“y’don’t know how long i’ve been dreaming about this,” you gasped as his hands traveled down until they reached the edge of your shirt, his rough fingertips brushing the bare skin where the shirt met your thighs. you whined and grasped the bedsheets as you tried not to just pull him to you, you were already so desperate you didn’t know know how much more you could forsake your dignity.
“how long?” you practically whined it out when his fingertips dipped under the shirt, slowly making their way up.
“ever since i saw you.” you whined out his name as his hands found their way to either side of your hips, the calluses on his thumbs created friction as they swiped along your soft skin.
“no underwear huh?” joel’s brown eyes were wide, his pupils blown out like you were sure yours were. you swallowed down as his eyes kept staring you down, staring where you needed him most.
“why waste time?” you noted, as his hands shoved the material up, past your belly-button leaving you exposed. joel pushed the material up until your breasts were exposed and your nipples poked up into the air. you would’ve felt shy if not for the low curse joel muttered under his breath. without warning the man dove down, his mouth traveling up your navel leaving kisses and bites along your center. your hands found refuge in his hair, tangling the damp strands between your fingers and pulling when he bit you a little harder than you anticipated. joel, tantalizingly slow, kissed his way to your breasts. his mouth latched onto one nipple as his fingers teased the other. the bite of his teeth, the suck of his mouth, and the rough pad of his finger felt like fire against you and it made your mind swim with desire. joel was mean to your breasts, not letting up until you could see red marks blooming on your chest. you had tried to be quiet, knowing joel didn’t want the whole neighborhood to hear you but you couldn’t help it when he pulled you between his teeth and moved away, “joel!” the fucker laughed at your reaction, pressing his now free thumb to your lips. without much thought you stuck your tongue out to lick it, joel’s grip on your hip tightened.
“want you inside.” joel’s erection was straining his boxers and you wanted to feel him, you’d beg if you had to. he nodded at your words, seemingly in a daze from your actions and words. lowering down as his hand followed and moved to finger you. he pulled your ankles to rest on his shoulders, giving him easier access. although you loved his hands, you wouldn’t last much longer, not with him looking at you like this and not with desire coursing through you more than any sensible thought. you wanted to come with him, placing a hand over his you spoke. “joel please just fuck me, i’m prepped.” joel seriously doubted that being that you struggled to take three of his fingers last time, but nonetheless he nodded and pressed a kiss to your ankle. joel pushed his boxers down, taking them off in one swift movement and your jaw dropped.
it was the biggest dick you’d ever seen, thick and long, perfectly cropped gray dark hair at the base and your mouth watered at the sight of it. despite your desire, doubt creeped into your mind, “joel it’s so big, i don’t think it’ll fit.” your words sparked a fire in him and joel had to push down the very real need to plunge into you and make you sob from the stretch but he needed to soothe your doubt. and despite your wide eyes he could see your pussy clenching on air as if begging to take him. joel had to stifle a smirk at the sight.
“you can take it doll, you’re a big girl.” you swallowed as you nodded, trusting him implicitly and sitting up as you watched him. despite your earlier comments, joel still had to check that you weren’t too tight and he didn’t need to grab lube to make it easier on you, he stuck two fingers into you, a low moan resounding from your throat at the feeling of something finally touching you where you needed. sure enough, joel found you were practically dripping. he looked from his fingers glistening from your ichor back to you with a teasing curiosity in his eyes and you just sighed in defeat, throwing your head back. joel took this time to move closer to you, your ankles going past his head as your legs glided over his shoulders, lining himself up. joel looked at you for any hesitation, except you were just looking past his face, nodding in anticipation.
joel does his best to move slowly, pushing his head in first, you gasp at the stretch. you’re burning up and yet you need more, you want him to break you. your eyes roll to the back of your head when he pushes two inches in and joel thinks he should take a picture of your face to save forever. he can keep his composure, control his speed until you look him straight in the eyes and smile so wide he thinks he might be imagining it. joel can’t help but plunge into you. your mind instantly goes numb, the stretch burning and his tip hitting your cervix, tears sting your eyes as joel gives you time to adjust, “so fucking tight pretty girl, it’s like you were made for me.” and you can’t talk, the pleasure cutting off any connection between your mind and your body. joel feels so suffocated by your pussy, he’s not sure he’ll last long, not when you look so pretty crying over his cock or when you’re so warm and wet for him he feels overwhelmed by the notion alone.
so he starts moving slowly, fractionally moving in and out, you start clenching less as your body gets used to him. it doesn’t stop the mind-numbing shock you feel when his dick kisses your cervix, but it still keeps you sane. joel feels himself going insane, even with his bad ear he can perfectly hear how fucking wet you are and the downright pornographic sounds your bodies are making. he’s still a gentleman, still has some decency to warn you before he fucks you dumb.
“safe word is texas okay.” you nod enthusiastically, clutching your breast as joel pulls out completely and fucks into you with his full length. your jaw slackens, tears pooling at the edge of your eyes, and you can’t help but scream his name. joel’s pace doesn’t relent after that, he’s bruising your cervix and your mind and body can only agree on one thing and that’s joel. you scream his name as the angle of your bodies does nothing to help the intense pleasure you feel. joel stretches you and you don’t think you could ever want another dick in your life, not when you can feel his veins imprinting on your walls, or the throb of his cock inside you. you cum when he angles himself even deeper, white painting your vision as you arch and stiffen against him, joel whispering praises as he keeps his brutal rhythm. you feel joel grow close when his grunts turn to curses and interchange with your name.
you think joel must be feeling as brainless as you do when he starts muttering, “this pussy is mine, y/n fuck can’t have anyone else after this.” you feel yourself close to another orgasm and then joel pushes against your hips, your legs stretching to get him closer, your bodies flush against each other and while you thought that joel couldn’t stretch you any more you were totally wrong. he’s dragging against your walls like he was made for them. pressing into you like he wants to put a baby in you, and you are so fucked dumb, words barely escaping your mouth as he slides in and out of you. you’re babbling nonsense and joel thinks he’s no better as he feels himself close. his thumb finds your clit, massaging until he feels you clench around him.
“come with me doll.” you cry out his name and joel takes it as a yes, his pace slowing down to an equally torturous slow and deep one. he moves to pull out and you whine. joel almost loses his mind.
“no no no please want your cum.” you’d deal with the consequences tomorrow right now you’d go crazy if you didn’t feel filled by him. and he can’t bring himself to deny you. you have tears streaming down your face from desire, and he’s not a monster. joel comes inside, burying himself to the hilt and you feel warm from his cum, feeling it fill you up and it’s so much you’re starting to think you’ll never feel fuller. when joel pulls out, your juices combined with his spill down your cunt, and joel thinks he’s worked up an appetite.
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#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller smut#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x reader#joel miller#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal#tlou joel#tlou ellie
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How to Lie to a Behavior Analyst
Feb. Requests-4
In which Spencer and Y/N are dating and it’s great but the only problem is… she’s Rossi’s daughter
Warnings: semi-smutty scenes, dirty talkin… fluff, lying, horny!Spencer, spence being reckless and reader being scared 💀
Spencer Reid x fem!rossi!reader
All parts of this are up on my pinned masterlist!
“Ohmygod, Spencer!” Y/N giggled as she inspected his face. She sat on his lap, touching his skin where she had noticed a bruise.
“I know…” He groaned.
Y/N eyes flickered up to his. “And you didn’t think to tell me that the guy beat your ass before you knocked him out?” She said, talking about the unsub from the last case Spencer was on.
Spencer rolled his eyes. “Okay baby, first of all, he did not beat my ass. He punched me once before I hit him with a crowbar. And second, can we stop talking about creepy psychopaths so I can fuck you?” He asked watching her face turn red.
Y/N kissed his lips and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. His hands found her hips naturally and he kissed her back, rubbing his thumbs over the hip bones. Now, this process would have moved a lot slower had she still had pants on but the moment Spencer got to her apartment he took them off of her. Now she was just left in a pair of her underwear and a loose t-shirt.
She moaned as one hand slid from her hip and between her legs, rubbing softly. She pulled away from his lips and hid her face in his shoulder, breathing heavily.
His lips found her neck as he kept rubbing, chuckling at how wet she was and he had just started touching her. “You miss me while I was gone, baby?” He asked into her skin.
She nodded, a whine leaving her lips. “I missed you and those hands of yours.”
Spencer smirked and helped her sit back up so he could look at her face. “What about my di-“
His words were cut off by the sound of one of their phones ringing. He groaned and held onto her ass, not wanting to stop trying to make her feel good. Y/N kissed his lips and crawled off of him, smiling at the fact that his hand stayed on her ass as long as it could before she was out of reach.
She looked on her bedside table and groaned when she realized that her father was calling her. “It’s mine.”
Y/N cleared her throat and picked it up. “Hey, dad!” She smiled, glancing back at Spencer who pressed his lips together and widened his eyes.
“Good morning, Y/N/N my beautiful.” He spoke. He sounded extra cheery this morning.
Spencer climbed up next to her and placed his hand on her thigh. She glared at him with her eyes but smiled with her lips. “What’s up, dad?”
Somehow, Spencer ended up laying between her legs pressing soft kisses on the insides of her thighs. Y/N dropped her mouth open wanting to moan so badly.
“I’m having a dinner on Saturday night and I want you to be there.” Rossi said. “Uncle Hotch wants to see you. So does the rest of the team.”
Spencer looked up at her, smirking and nodding as he continued to tease her. She grabbed his hair and pulled it harshly trying to get him to stop with a smile on her face.
He did not stop. In fact, his lips turned into his tongue, licking and biting the insides of her thighs. His hands grabbed the outsides, squeezing roughly.
“Y-yeah! I would love to come.” She replied, her mouth falling open when his lips got closer.
Closer… closer… closer—
“Sweetie?”
Y/N snapped out of her thoughts. “Sorry, dad. Got a little uh… distracted. What did you say?”
Rossi chuckled on the other end. “Uh I know you’ve got this… crush on Reid but…”
“Sorry— what? You’re breaking up.” Y/N furrowed her brows.
“I said I don’t want you to have a crush on—“
“Whoa— sorry dad. I can’t hear you. I have something in the oven that’s gonna burn— gotta go. Bye, love you!”
She hung up the phone, tossed it somewhere and shut her eyes. Spencer propped himself up on his elbows and smiled at her. “You have a crush on me?”
Y/N rolled her eyes. “I’m gonna kill you.”
Spencer chuckled and swiftly flipped them over so she was hovering over his face. “By sitting on my face?” He quirked an eyebrow. “I’m okay with that.”
.•.•.•.•.•.•.
It was Thursday morning and Y/N though she would stop by her dad’s office and bring everyone donuts.
She walked through with the box and smiled at the people who greeted her. She walked into the bullpen, Derek spotting her first.
“Hey, Rossi Junior!” He called out. “Good to see you, girl.” He smiled as he hugged her. “Even better to see you with food.” He kissed her cheek as the other started walking over to them. Derek took the box from her and set it down on one of the desks.
Rossi and Hotch walked up side by side and Spencer behind them with JJ and Garcia. “Hi, sweetie.”
“Hi, daddy.” She smiled as he kissed both of her cheeks.
Hotch gave her a hug and greeted her swiftly. Garcia squealed as she hugged Y/N and rocked her back and forth. “Ugh! I haven’t seen this beautiful baby face in so long!” She said squeezing the woman.
“Pen— can’t… breathe.” Penelope apologized and let her go, pinching her cheek and going to see what kind of donuts she brought.
JJ and Emily hugged her next and then it got to Spencer. She glanced at his sexy face before nodding at him, knowing that he doesn’t really like physical contact.
It was crazy because she was sitting on his face not too long ago.
“So what brings you by, Y/N/N?” Derek asked, chewing on a glazed donut.
Y/N walked over leaning against a desk next to her dad who wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Oh, I was just on my way to work and I realized how much I missed you all so I brought you donuts and myself.” She smiled, motioning to both things.
She could swear she felt Spencer’s eyes on her. They usually were.
“Aw that’s sweet.” Emily smiled.
Y/N nodded. “I should really get going now.” She kicked off of the desk. “But I’m gonna go use the bathroom first.” She added.
Rossi rubbed her arm. “We’ll be in the round table room briefing so we’ll see you Saturday.”
Y/N smiled, kissing her father’s cheek. “See you all Saturday.”
They all said their goodbyes and she walked towards the bathroom.
When she got in there she smiled and waited by the door. A few moments later there were three knocks and she opened the door, quickly pulling her boyfriend in.
Desperate lips met hers and she reached behind him to lock the door as she kissed him. “I missed you.” She said in between kisses.
Spencer chuckled. “You saw me yesterday.” He smiled as her kisses grew deeper.
She hummed. “I wanna see you all day, every day.” She spoke, pulling away from him with a small pout on her lips. “How’d you get away from them?” She asked.
“I told them my mom called.” He whispered, pecking her lips. He gasped in shock when she hit his shoulder.
“Don’t use your mom to lie, Spencer that’s not nice!” She shook her head.
Spencer tilted his head to the side. “Would you rather me have told them that I was coming to make out with you or…” Y/N rolled her eyes.
“Whatever, get back out there. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She giggled, pushing him away gently.
Spencer shook his head. “No, you’ll see me tonight.”
She gave him a sweet smile. “Yours or mine?”
The man caressed her cheek gently. “Mine. I’m gonna cook you dinner with all of the fun kitchen gadgets you made me buy.”
Y/N scoffed. “Spence, you didn’t even have a can opener!” She patted his chest and laughed.
He chuckled and kissed her once, twice, three times before she pushed him away. “Go before they get suspicious.” She whispered.
Spencer reluctantly pulled away and unlocked the bathroom door, slipping out discreetly and leaving Y/N to stand there with a warm smile on her face.
.•.•.•.•.•.
It was Saturday night and Spencer watched Y/N try on four different dresses from his spot in his bed.
They would leave from the same place but take different cars so it wasn’t suspicious. Spencer would take the longer way there and Y/N wold take the short cut.
“I don’t know, I think I like the blue one.” She said, turning so she could see the back in the mirror. She had on a blue satin dress that had a little bow on the back.
Spencer bit his lip. “Yeah… I definitely like the blue one too.” He said, looking at where the neckline swooped down.
“Stop looking at my boobs and come zip me up, please.” He rolled his eye with a smile and slid off the bed, walking up behind her and slowly lifting the zipper, stopping right before it was at the end.
“Are you sure I can’t unzip you?” He asked. “We’ve got thirty minutes and with the way you look, I only need five.” He dipped his head down, kissing her neck.
Y/N’s shoulders raised and she hummed. “You can take the dress off me when we get back here after dinner.” She said, planting her hand in his hair. “I can’t get all messed up. The they’ll know we’re together.”
Spencer groaned and wrapped an arm around the front of her, swiping his thumb across her red lips. “I can’t wait to see this pretty little makeup all smudged.” He said lowly into her ear. Her mouth dropped open and her chest heaved.
She wrapped her lips around his thumb and shut her eyes, her tongue swirling around it. He groaned. “I honestly don’t think I could ever get it up for anyone else.”
Y/N smirked and popped his thumb out of her mouth. “Change your tie. It’s the same color as my dress. We’re gonna look like we’re going to freakin’ prom together.”
Spencer rolled his eyes and stalked over to his closet.
.•.•.•.•.•.
Spencer arrived at Rossi’s 20 minutes after Y/N. She was chatting with Garcia and JJ over a glass of wine. She looked so pretty laughing and smiling.
“Hey, kid!” Rossi greeted, snapping him out of his trance. He smiled at the man. “There’s wine in the dining room, dinner will be done soon.”
“Great.” He smiled.
He was about to make his way to the dining room but Garcia called his name. “Boy Wonder! Over here!”
He stopped and sighed before turning to them with a smile. Y/N smiled at him, crossing her arms and sipping her wine.
“Soooooo, what are you doing for your birthday this year?” The blonde asked, grinning.
Hopefully getting my dick sucked. “Uh…” He shrugged. “I think I’m just gonna take my mom out to dinner and go buy some more books.” He nodded.
Derek came up behind him, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “Uh, no.” He shook his head. “You can do the mom thing just no books, you nerd.” He spoke. “I’m taking you to a strip club.”
Y/N’s breath hitched and she slid her tongue across her teeth. Spencer glanced at Garcia before looking at his girlfriend. Hotch and Rossi joined their circle.
“Uh… I’m okay, actually. I’d rather just stay home.” He nodded, sticking his hands in his pockets.
Derek scoffed. “Why? You got a girl or something?” Spencer tired and successfully avoided glancing at Y/N and shook his head shrugging.
“No, I just… don’t really wanna go see a bunch of naked girls.” I only wanna see one naked girl.
Emily snorted. “What planet are you from? What man doesn’t want to see a bunch of naked girls dancing around, swinging their hoo-has in your face?”
“Swinging?” Y/N grimaced. “What strip clubs have you been to?” She laughed.
Emily scoffed. “The good kind.”
Garcia shook her head. “Okay— anyway, I think Reid has a girlfriend, who’s with me?” She raised her hand.
Everyone including Y/N raised their hands. She pressed her tongue to the bottom of her mouth to keep from laughing.
Spencer rolled his eyes. “Guys I don’t have a girlfriend.” He said, pulling his hand out of his pocket.
“Why is your thumb red?” JJ asked, nodding at his hand.
Y/N pressed her lips together and looked at the ground.
Spencer opened his mouth but shut it again. “I was making Kool-Aid earlier and that stuff stains like a bitch.”
Y/N sighed and shook her head slightly. Literally everyone on this room knows I live off of Kool-Aid. Literally had a Kool-Aid man themed birthday part, I am so obsessed.
She looked back up to meet her father’s stare. Y/N/N, Can you help me with the Carbonara?” He asked, nodding his head to the kitchen.
She swallowed and nodded, putting a smile on her face. She glanced at Spencer before following her father into the kitchen.
“Ooh, It smells good, dad.” She hummed, hoping that he wouldn’t try and talk to her about what all the awkwardness with Spencer was about.
“I remember when you were a little girl and you first learned how to make it with me.” He smiled, leaning against the counter on his palms.
Her phone buzzed in her bag and she took it out quickly.
Dick Dealer💘
How to lie to a behavior analyst: Don’t maintain excessive eye contact, keep your voice even, say my name if you refer to me, don’t fidget— I love you
She inhaled deeply and slid her phone back in her bag, setting it on the counter. “I love cooking with you, dad.” She smiled.
Rossi nodded towards his spice organizer and she walked over grabbing the black pepper and garlic powder.
“Can you be honest with me for a moment, sweetie?” He asked as she sprinkled the seasonings in. She glanced at him.
“Yeah, always.” She shrugged, smiling.
He walked around the kitchen island and sighed. “Are you… involved with Spencer Reid?”
Y/N furrowed her eyebrows and looked at him, her lips quirking up. “What? No, of course not.”
Rossi nodded. “I just… I just noticed some weird stuff back in there. The way you got… jealous when Derek mentioned taking Spencer to a— his birthday plans.” He grimaced.
Y/N laughed a little, trying to keep her voice even. She looked at her dad, making eye contact with him. “Well, like you said you did figure out that I have a crush on Spencer. I was just jealous about that.” She shrugged.
Rossi nodded. “A-and I’ve noticed how weird it is that you seemingly ignore him when we’re all together. What’s up with that?”
Y/N scoffed. “God, dad. Do I need a lawyer or something? Why are you grilling me?”
The father sighed. “You’re right. I’m sorry, I’m just a little protective.”
His daughter smiled and looked back down at the pot she was stirring. “No, it’s okay. I get it but there’s nothing going on between Spencer and I.”
He smiled and kissed her head. “I’ve got it from here if you wanna go back out with your friends.”
Y/N bit her lip. “I think I’ll stay here with you. We need to catch up. How’s Crystal?”
.•.•.•.•.•.
At dinner, Spencer sat across the way from his girlfriend. He was sitting beside Rossi so there was no way he could see the looks that he was giving Y/N.
He was mostly giving her worried looks because she wasn’t making eye contact with him at all.
Once dinner was done, she stuck around to help clean up. Spencer bit his lip as he left the Rossi household, glancing at Y/N through the window before getting in his car and driving home where he would meet Y/N.
.•.•.•.
“Fuck!” Y/N panted and rolled off of him. Spencer gripped her hips even as she collapsed on the bed beside him, squeezing his eyes shut.
She shut her eyes and bit her lip, scooting forward to wrap her legs around his waist and laying her head on his chest. “M’sleepy, Spence.” She mumbled.
“So what did you and your dad talk about?” He asked, rubbing her skin.
Y/N popped her eyes back open. “Are you really asking me about my dad not even thirty seconds after I rode your dick?” She grimaced.
Spencer chuckled. “M’sorry, baby.” He kissed her head. “I just— you got all weird during dinner. You weren’t even looking at me.”
Y/N sighed. “He just asked me if I was ‘involved’ with you. I denied it, of course but I’m still not sure that he fully believes me.” She shrugged. “Did he say something to you?”
Spencer shook her head. “Nope.”
Y/N bit her lip. “Good.” She pressed her forehead into Spencer’s chest again and kissed it. “I’m going to sleep unless you wanna go again?” She smirked.
“You horn dog. Go to sleep.” He chuckled. “I love you.”
Y/N hummed and giggled sleepily. “I love you.”
An hour later Spencer was still awake, running his fingertips across the bare skin of Y/N’s back gently as she slept. His phone buzzed on the bedside table and he sighed, pausing his movements and reached over to grab it.
Rossi
I know she thinks you two are hiding it well. I’ll let you get away with it for now. You hurt my daughter, I shoot you in the face.
Spencer’s eyes widened and he almost groaned loudly had Y/N not been asleep on his chest.
He gulped and put his phone down deciding that he wouldn’t tell Y/N that her dad knew about them until it was a problem.
Which even when it was, he would still do everything to make sure she never got hurt.
.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.
I ABSOLUTELY LOVED WRITING THIS OMGGG
AND I LOVE YOU READER (WHO ASKED NOT TO BE TAGGED) If it’s not how you’d hoped, I will happily rewrite it:)
Spence and Y/N really we’re just horny this entire time💀 also Derek is an asshole 😭
#spencer reid#spencer fluff#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid smut#criminal minds imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x original female character#criminal minds#spencer x oc#spencer x reader#crimimal minds#spencer x you#Rossi!fem!reader
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so first off all i wanted to say that i LOVE your writing.
but, if you don’t mind, could you make an NSFW fic about a dilf! toji with his babysitter. but like cheating.
so basically toji has a wife but he’s cheating on her with the babysitter(whose like 10 years younger than him).
i’d really love if you could do it
thanks bookie🫶🏽
Pairing: dilf!Toji x babysitter!reader
Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~1.7k
cw: age gap (reader is 21, Toji is in his 30s), language, cheating, smut – PIV sex (doggy style), breeding kink, daddy kink
Author’s Notes: Thank you for your kind words, you are too sweet! This is my very first Toji fic EVER, so I was very excited (and nervous!) to write it. I hope I did it justice, this is such a delicious idea for him. Also, I have never read the manga, so if the characterization is off, I’m so sorry! I really, really hope you like this one! Divider created by @/fic-dumpster.
You stand in front of a quaint house, checking your watch for the time. It’s been almost ten minutes now since you knocked, no answer. You gave the number from the listing a call, still nothing. Rolling your eyes, you take a seat on the steps leading to the door, waiting.
It’s the summer before you head back to university for your senior year. In an attempt to make some extra cash, you took a job as a babysitter through local ads in the paper. The first two clients were completely normal; this one is already leaving a bad taste in your mouth.
Fifteen minutes have passed. You try once more, pounding on the door with your fist as loud as you can. Heel turned, ready to leave, it suddenly swings open, revealing a muscular man with black hair, glaring at you. “What the fuck do you want?”
You step back, startled by his intimidating presence. Stuttering, you answer, “I’m the babysitter.”
He continues to stare at you, eyes following your body up and down, studying it. “Babysitter?”
Before you can explain any further, you hear a car rolling into the driveway. A woman in professional attire steps out quickly. “I’m so sorry I’m late!” She rushes towards you, holding her hand out to shake yours. “We spoke on the phone. I got stuck in traffic, I’m so sorry.”
You smile at her. “It’s okay.”
She faces the man, expression switching from cheery to dreary in an instant. “Toji, where is Megumi?”
He scratches his head. “Huh?”
“Megumi. Our child.”
He sighs. “Right. Uh, I’ll go get him.”
While he’s gone, the woman pulls you aside, speaking in a hushed voice. “That’s Toji, my husband and Megumi’s father. Unfortunately, he’s a complete deadbeat. That’s why I want to hire you. I started my new job and I need someone to take care of Megumi while I’m gone during the day.”
She swallows hard, blinking to fight off oncoming tears. “I have no one. I’ve been shunned by my family, my husband doesn’t give a shit about ours, and I’m all alone trying to give Megumi a good life. I know this is a lot to ask, but I’m desperate. This is just until I can save enough money to hire a full-time nanny.”
She grips onto your wrist with both her hands, begging for help. Truthfully, it’s a lot to unravel, more drama than you anticipated. But the anguish in her eyes tugs at your heartstrings. Plus, knowing it’s temporary doesn’t make it seem so difficult. How bad can it be? “Okay. I’ll do it.”
Relief washes over her. “Oh thank god. Thank you. Thank you. Let’s go inside and I can give you a tour.” She leads you through the entrance, removing her shoes as you follow her. “Oh, and one more thing.”
“Sure.”
“Toji is home most of the day, but he’s always couped up in his room, doing god knows what. Just leave a meal or two outside his door twice a day. That should be enough.”
“Huh?!”
She glances at you with a nervous smile on her face. “Yeah. I told you, he’s good for nothing.”
You don’t respond while you maneuver through the house, barely paying attention while she shows you around. It almost sounds like you’ll be babysitting two children…
~~~
The first two weeks of your new job go by smoothly. Megumi is an adorable baby; he’s almost two-years-old with hair as black as his father’s. While he never really smiles, he doesn’t cry either, expression usually stern, unless he needs a diaper change. He’s self-sufficient, always immersed by his own toys until it’s time to eat. Overall, he’s easy.
Toji, on the other hand, is another story.
You follow his wife’s instructions, leaving two meals outside his door, breakfast and lunch. And this asshole has the audacity to critique it! The bread wasn’t toasted enough. The eggs were too runny. There wasn’t enough seasoning on the meat. All this criticism while each plate is licked clean, not a crumb to spot. He’s never even uttered a simple thank you.
But what he lacks in social skills or personality, he makes up for in his physique. In between meals, he works out in the living room lifting weights, doing push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups at the frame of the door. It lasts for over an hour, and by the end of it, he’s shirtless, dripping with sweat. You’ve done everything in your power to avoid staring but it doesn’t prevent your mind from conjuring all types of lewd thoughts about him. You’re ashamed to admit that he is physically attractive, only because everything else about him is utter trash. Still, it doesn’t hurt to look, right?
On the third week, there’s a shift in energy between you two. When he isn’t working out or going out to meet with his sketchy friends, he’s usually couped up in his bedroom, ignoring you and Megumi. This morning, he actually joins you in the kitchen. You stare blankly at him, stunned by his sudden appearance. Megumi is unfazed by his father as he tries to pull your wrist towards him to get a spoonful of mushed up peas.
When he catches you, Toji glares. “What?”
“Um, nothing. Just surprised to see you here.” You clear your throat, focusing back on the baby.
He rolls his eyes. “This is my house. I can do whatever I want.”
“Yes, of course. Sir.”
For some reason, this triggers him. He stands up abruptly, stepping to you, leaning his face towards yours. The scar on the corner of his lip twitches when he gives you a wicked grin. “That’s right. I’m in charge here.”
You flinch from him, scared, maybe even slightly aroused. He’s intense, that’s for sure. But part of you finds it exhilarating to be in his presence.
Megumi whines for more food, to which Toji grabs the utensil from your hands to start feeding him. “Damn kid, he’s hungry all the fucking time.”
You sit up in your seat, regaining your composure. “You shouldn’t curse in front of children.”
He faces you, chuckling. “Curse? Seriously? What are you, five?”
You cross your arms, answering, “I’m twenty-one.”
“Interesting.” There’s that naughty smirk again, as if he’s thinking something obscene in that twisted head of his. And while you should be turned off, you’re not. You squeeze your legs together, pussy throbbing between your thighs. And of course, he notices this. He must, because he leans forward, lips grazing your ear, whispering, “Come by my room whenever Megumi is taking his nap. That’s an order.”
~~~
This is bad. Very, very bad.
You're supposed to be better than this. Clearly, you aren’t, because you’re currently getting railed by your employer’s husband while his child sleeps peacefully in the next room.
“Fuck, this pussy is tight,” he groans, pumping his thick cock in and out of you. You’re bent over the edge of the bed, his hips smacking against your ass as he thrusts into you. He’s got a tight grip on your hips, nails digging into your flesh, pounding away at your greedy pussy, absolutely drenched with arousal and lube. Your face is sticky with perspiration, pillow soaked with sweat and drool. It’s a fucking mess, but it doesn’t matter, because all you can think about is Toji fucking you until you’re seeing stars. Until your head is empty and nothing but his fat cock is occupying your thoughts.
“God, you’re squeezing me so fucking hard, princess. You gonna come again?”
You nod erratically, reaching your fingers to your clit. He smacks it away, doing it himself, his thumb flicking against your swollen bud. “Fucking come on my cock then. Make it nice and creamy for me, got it?”
His cock is buried deep inside you, hitting your sweet spot over and over until you unravel, gushing around him once more. You’ve lost count on how many orgasms you’ve had in this short amount of time.
After your climax, he doesn’t pull out, fucking you even rougher. Your body is pliant around him, yielding to his every touch like putty. You’ve lost control of yourself, completely enraptured in the intense pleasure he surrounds you with.
He leans forward, chest pressed to your back, lips brushed to your ear. “I’m gonna knock you up. Give Megumi a little brother or sister. Would you like that?” He’s crazy. Completely unhinged. Absolutely fucking psycho.
“Fuck yes, I want that,” you moan. “Give it to me, daddy. Breed me.”
And apparently, so are you.
“Oh fuck yeah, take my fucking cum then,” he growls. The bed creaks violently below you, his backshots brutal and frantic now, cock desperate for release. “I’m gonna get you fucking pregnant. Make you mine.”
He shoots his hot load inside you, stuffing you full of his cum. He doesn’t stop until he’s fucked it deeper into your pussy, watching with that sexy look on his face as his creamy cum leaks out of your slit.
Lifting you up to lay comfortably on the bed, he rolls beside you, kissing you sloppily until Megumi’s whimpers blare through the baby monitor, indicating that he’s awake. Toji laughs, smacking your ass as you crawl over him to return to your real job.
~~~
You spend the remainder of your summer employed at the Fushiguro household until you have to go back to school. You and Toji continue to fuck each other silly every day that you’re working.
The day before you leave for college, you say your goodbyes to the family. Megumi’s mom, who remains blissfully unaware of your sins, hugs you tightly. “Thank you so much for all your help. I’ve finally saved enough money to afford a full-time nanny, so we’ll be fine.”
“It was my pleasure. I had a lot of fun. With Megumi,” you clarify, avoiding Toji’s gaze as he watches from the kitchen.
“Seriously. You’re a good person. I hope you know that.” She smiles, truly grateful. “And thank you for taking care of my good for nothing husband too.”
As the guilt of this dirty, filthy secret eats away at you, Toji stares at you from across the room, smirking.
#toji x reader#toji fushiguro#jjk toji#dilf toji#toji smut#toji x you#toji x y/n#fushiguro toji#toji jjk#jujutsu kaisen toji#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#toji fushiguro smut#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fushiguro x you#jjk request#requests#toji request
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♡My Dear, Don’t Ever Disappear | Neteyam S.
❦Summary: You wake up with a pounding headache and no clue where you are. It’s only after your cries for help your best friend appears. Except… it seems like he’s the reason for all of this.
❦Tags: Stalker!Neteyam - this man is actually crazy, muder🫢, porn w plot, dubcon/noncon, smutty af, kidnapping, pet names, biting, bondage, knifeplay, he loves you in a insane way. Word Count: 3k +
❦Author’s Note: NO PROOFREADING WE RAWDOG THIS! The voices got to me and I made this. Ooc Neteyam for mf sure but it’s just- ugh. My brain couldn’t stop thinking abt it<3
You woke up groggy, the first time you noticed was a severe ache in the back of your skull. What the hell happened? You opened your eyes to find you were not at home, nor in a hospital, you were in a cold concrete room. It had to be the old lab, a basement you hadn’t found yet. Well, that is unspeakably unsettling, you thought to yourself as your heart picked up its pace.
You winced as you tried to sit up, Your whole body was a dull throb, your arms stiff from their position. It took mere moments before you felt the cool touch of metal against your wrists, you tried to move away, but the sounds of chains clinking together gave away that they were keeping you on the floor. Panic slowly begun settling in the pits of your stomach, a looming sense of dread washing over you.
You were just going to work, walking out of base camp, and then nothing. Nothing at all. Trying to remember made your head pound, you didn't know what day it was, the fucking time, or if you were even in the same village. “Hello?”
Your voice echoed against the walls, the only response being the drip drop of water leaking through the walls, you were underground. That much you could tell. As your eyes adjusted to the dim light you noticed another presence, a figure standing at the door with their arms crossed.
“Boo.”
Your body jolted upwards, the chains pulling you back. You felt your blood go cold. They were tall, so tall you could hardly see all of them. You felt like the breath had been knocked out of your lungs, your mouth was dry and you could only stutter as he stepped forward. “No, no, no, no,” you mumbled to yourself, as he crouched down in front of you.
“Don’t fucking touch me! Somebody help! Help,” you screamed at the top of your lungs, the man didn't seem perturbed at all by your cries. “My Ewya, you’re loud,” he reached up, pulling the sloppily fashioned skull mask from his face. “Neteyam?!” You were baffled. Why was Neteyam here? This wasn’t some sick joke was it?
“Thank god you’re awake,” he sighed, his hand moving to push your hair out of your face. His fingers brushed against the gash on your forehead, causing you to wince. “I thought I hit your pretty little head too hard and put you in a coma.” His fingers trailed down the side of your face, his thumb swiping against your bottom lip, and you couldn't help but recoil. There was something different about him, he wasn't the same Neteyam that was so sweet to you.
“Neteyam what the fuck are you-” you were cut off by his voice, a crazed smile spreading across his face. “Surprise!” He yelled, throwing his hands up, he seemed ecstatic, and you had never felt more terrified. “I really wanted to do this differently, honestly, but it was so hard to get you alone.”
You could only stare, not wanting to say a word, the silence making your throat tighten. Neteyam looked down, his fingers tapping on his knees. You had never seen him like this before, his normal cheery and kind nature completely gone.“I-if Kyle finds out-”
Neteyam’s change in expression cut you off quickly, his eyes changing into something dark, his brow furrowing as his lip curled into a snarl. You swallowed thickly, not sure how to handle him, or the situation. “And what the fuck will a human named Kyle do to me? For Ewya’s sake I do not understand your obsession with this creature. He is weak, frail, short, pale skinned and so stupid.”
For just a moment you had a mere second to think and you were insulted on Kyle’s behalf. Yes, he wasn’t as tall as Neteyam or buff or particularly attractive but he was human. Neteyam huffed, his hand reaching up to pull your face towards him.
You were pulled back into reality as his fingers touched you, you were so pathetically helpless, chained to the ground, and at his mercy. His thumb rubbed along your cheek, and his eyes narrowed on yours. “It’s doesn’t matter now, yawne. I took care of him.”
Your blood ran cold, a sudden fear that he was speaking the truth, It made you want to vomit, a horrible pit forming in your stomach. But the way he said it, like he was proud of his actions, the look in his eyes as he stared down at you, it all made your heart drop. “You’re insane!”
“Only for you,” his smile reached both ears, a look that made the hair on the back of your neck stand on end. Your heart beat wildly in your chest, and your eyes started to water, your brain running a million miles a minute trying to come up with a solution, but nothing came. Neteyam leaned down, placing a kiss against your forehead.
It was… Oddly comforting, unnervingly soft. The way his lips felt against your skin was a stark contrast to his behavior, it was almost loving. “you’re so pretty when you cry, yawne,” his breath was hot on your skin, his voice soft, and it made your skin crawl.
“Fuck you, Neteyam.” You tried to turn away, but his grip tightened on your jaw, keeping you firmly in place, the chains digging into your wrists. You didn't want to look at him, and you certainly didn't want him looking at you. “You’ve read my mind, pretty.” You tried to squirm, and pull away, the chains biting into your skin and cutting into the delicate flesh. Your hands were numb from being locked in place, the muscles tensing and relaxing with the blood circulation.
“I really wish we could have done this in a nicer way… but you are so hardheaded. I was so nice, I did everything in the world to impress you... and not once did you notice me.” Neteyam unsheathed a blade you didn’t realize he was carrying, the metal glistening in the dim light. You felt tears well up in the corners of your eyes, the sight of it alone making your stomach flip, a knot forming deep within you.
The chains rattled as you squirmed, his grip tight on your chin. The metal slid across the delicate flesh of your jaw, it was cold to the touch and sent endless shivers down your spine. Neteyam traced his way down your neck, slowly running down your chest, stopping just before he reached your top. “I’ve dreamt of this for so long… of you, without these ugly human clothes, beneath me, whimpering and crying, of me, inside you... of you saying my name.”
A new feeling began creeping into your thoughts, it wasn't fear or panic, but something else entirely. His words, his voice, everything was too much, and it was beginning to make your head spin. Neteyam moved it slowly, slicing the fabric from the front of your chest, the knife easily cutting through the fabric of your blouse and bra. You didn't notice the cold air hitting the exposed skin, and all you could think of was his dagger as it trailed down your abdomen.
He let out a guttural growl as he stared down at you, his eyes transforming into something more animalistic. “You’re so perfect. I should have killed Kyle sooner…” Your core began to warm, a heat growing deep within your belly as his eyes roamed over your body, a new wave of shame and humiliation washing over you. This was turning you on, which was completely repulsive considering the situation.
Neteyam slid the knife along the inner part of your thigh, the sharp edge scraping against the supple skin, making you gasp. He took his time cutting the fabric, his movements precise, and careful, his gaze focused on the task at hand. Neteyam let out a sort of chuckle, pausing his movements as he gazed up at you, a curious look in his eye. “You like this don’t you?”
The next words came out as a stuttered, incoherent mess of denial. “N-no- you’re c-crazy! I hate you.” His blade sliced the thin string of fabric between your legs, cutting the material with ease. “Don’t lie to me, pet. I can smell you.” You bit your lip, not daring to make eye contact. The blade pressed against the inside of your thighs, dangerously close to your heat, and you felt your legs twitch.
You didn't understand this, the way the knife made your pulse race, the way his fingers danced across your skin made you burn. His hand moved slowly, the blade pressed against your skin, the metal cool against your warmth. You felt the knife drag, and you bit down harder on your lip, trying not to show any sort of reaction, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.
Neteyam moved the knife upward, dragging the metal against your gaped lips, the smoothness of the blade making your core tighten. Your mind was swimming, unable to concentrate, the blade was pressing harder, the sharp point breaking the delicate skin. A drop of blood seeped through, and Neteyam's eyes seemed to glow, his mouth hung open slightly.
Neteyam dropped the blade, the clatter echoing through the small room, his lips reaching out to touch the wound, a small red spot where the knife had been pressed. If there was any blood, it was washed away as his tongue lashed out, cleaning the area with long, slow movements.
Your mouth opened slightly, and a small whine escaped. Neteyam chuckled into your mouth, his hand snaking up your body to grasp at your throat. You couldn't help but moan softly, as his grip tightened around your windpipe, constricting your airways.
“You’re an ass,” you hissed, his hand loosening. You had a feeling the knife had been a trick, the way he had played it up and teased, the way he had made you feel. It wasn't a true threat, and he knew it. “Oh, you don’t want to play nice anymore? He pulled the chains that binged your wrists to the wall, yanking you out of position with a yelp. Neteyam pulled you so your face was mere inches from his, “ I see you, pet. I can be meaner, hm?"
You realized in this moment how his strength truly outmatched yours, his arms easily forcing you onto the ground. You tried to pull away, the cold floor biting at the bare skin of your back. Neteyam leaned down, forcing his mouth onto yours,his tongue slipping past your lips and into your mouth. You couldn't help but let out a muffled groan, the taste of blood lingering on his tongue.
His hands groped at the bare skin of your hips, his touch sending waves of heat throughout your body. He kissed you with an urgency, like he was starving for it, his teeth tugging on your lip. The sensation made a low groan slip past your lips, and his lips curled into a wicked smile. Neteyam’s tongue slipped out of your mouth, moving down your neck, his sharp teeth nibbling at your skin.
You felt your body begin to react, your blood pulsing, your chest heaving with each labored breath. It was disgusting, and humiliating. You were completely under his control, and you could do nothing about it. You could only watch as his hands wandered, as he moved his tongue down the front of your chest, the feeling of his dangling braids tickling your flesh. And for some reason, not even ewya could explain, you were enjoying it.
His lips wrapped around one of your breasts, his hot tongue gliding over the flesh. You threw your head back, moaning softly, his tongue flicking over the sensitive tip, his teeth lightly nibbling at the sensitive skin. Neteyam let out a deep groan, his mouth closing over it. You were so absorbed in what his tongue was doing to you, you failed to notice his hand slipping between your thighs.
You let out a strangled moan, as his long fingers brushed against your dripping folds. Your eyes snapped open, the sensation was so foreign. He slid a finger inside, pumping it slowly, his thumb circling around the sensitive bud. It felt incredible, and you hated that, the pleasure washing over you.
You could hear Neteyam let out a chuckle, the sound vibrating through his lips. "Look how wet you are, pet." He began forcing in another finger, stretching you out and filling you with a burning heat. You felt your eyes roll back, letting out a soft mewl, the sound of him thrusting into you echoed through the room.
"M-more, please," you begged, his fingers moving faster, the feeling overwhelming, making you squirm. "Please, more," you panted, your pussy beginning to clench around his fingers. “Beg louder.” Neteyam's hand gripped tighter around your neck, his fingers forcing themselves deeper, stretching you.
You could feel a coil building up inside, the sensation was too much, and you were so close. “Splease, Sso good,” you slurred. Neteyam proded at the spongy spot inside you, making the coil tighten further, your walls starting to quiver around him. “P-please! Teyam please!”
Neteyam pulled his fingers out suddenly, your orgasm being cut off immediately. You let out a loud whine, a pitiful plea to keep going, his fingers leaving a trail of your own slick as they moved up. Then, he slapped you clean across the face.The sound echoed through the room, and you felt your whole body tense up. The force of the impact was surprising, and it was quickly followed by a painful stinging.
"You thought I was going to let you cum so easily? After the attitude you’ve had all night? No way, brat, I’m going to ruin you first." Neteyam was so calm, his voice so collected, it was almost unnerving. You were stunned, obscenely horny, and mildly terrified of the monster in front of you.
He sat back, admiring his handiwork. You were spread out, bound, and completely nude. Your eyes met his, and a dark laugh bubbled up in his throat. "you should see yourself," he cooed. “You look so pretty all disheveled for me.”
Neteyam leaned forward, his long, deft fingers wrapping around your throat, forcing you up, the chains chafing the delicate skin. His mouth connected with yours, the kiss more heated than the others, his teeth tugging at your bottom lip. You could feel his excitement through his loincloth, the heat radiating off of him, his length straining against the fabric.
The sudden shift in emotions made you dizzy, his touch becoming rough, and violent. Then twisting into slow and sensual, the way his tongue gilded against yours, the way his lips moved expertly against yours, the way his hands moved along your body. "I'm going to mark the fuck out of you so no man ever comes near you again.”
Neteyam grasped at your hips, proving his superior strength by flipping you over with ease. One of his large hands wrapped into your hair, the other pulling your ass up so you could feel him. He was undeniably huge, so thick, and in no way was he going to fit inside you. The sensation alone made you whimper, and it only got worse as he rubbed himself against you.
The sound of him unfastening his cloth, the jingling of his jewelry was enough to make your core tighten. His cock slipped between your folds, the head rubbing against your clit. Neteyam let out a low growl, the feeling of him making you shudder, his hands gripping the back of your neck.
Neteyam forced himself inside of you, the sudden intrusion making you scream out, and tears well up in the corners of your eyes. He was impossibly big, filling you entirely, stretching you. You let out a series of broken moans, as he slid out only to thrust back inside. Neteyam's free hand slid down your spine, his fingers gently caressing your back, before he slapped your ass.
“That’s it, baby. Keep screaming my name just like that.” Neteyam's voice was strained, the words coming out like a hiss. His grip tightened on the base of your neck, holding you firmly in place, while his hips pounded against you. The sounds of his body hitting yours echoed through the room, his cock stretching you with each thrust.
He wasn't going easy, "F-fuck me!” you cried out, as his cock grazed your g-spot. Neteyam dropped his head into the crook of your neck, his teeth leaving an imprint, his hands holding you down, his body flush against you.
The knot began to build once more, and Neteyam picked up his pace, fucking into you with reckless abandon. You moaned and whimpered, unable to stop the obscene noises that fell from your lips. His heavy panting sent chills down your spine.
Neteyam let out a deep, animalistic growl, his nails digging into the soft flesh of your hips, his teeth biting into your shoulder. "You feel so good around me, baby.” His cock throbbed inside you, his tip pounded at your cervix. You felt your pussy clamp around him, the feeling making Neteyam's hips jerk, and you let out a loud, pleasured wail.
You were so close, and the knot in your belly was tightening. “Please can I cum?!” You yelled out. Neteyam pulled himself from the warmth of your body, and you could hear his breathing turn ragged. “No no no, I have to see you.”
You didn't have to wait long, Neteyam flipped you onto your back, and his lips met yours. You felt his cock press against your folds, the head of him pushing past the entrance. His lips attached themselves to the side of your neck, his hands sliding up your chest to wrap around your throat.
Neteyam's hips met yours, his cock pounding inside you, “keep begging, yawne.” His long fingers moved to circle your clit, his thumb rolling the sensitive nub, making your eyes roll back. “Please, Neteyam,” you cried, “sgood, please can I cum!”
"Are you going to be a good little girl from now on?" Neteyam hissed, his fingers moving faster. You nodded, as you let out a low cry, "y-yes! P please, I’ll be good! You were on the verge of tears, your mind clouded. Neteyam let out a guttural groan, his pace picking up but his movements getting progressively sloppy.
Your legs began to shake, the knot was beginning to unravel. Neteyam's cock throbbed inside you, and you knew he was getting close too. "i-im gonna-" His fingers curled around your throat, stopping your sentence. “Cum on this dick like a good pet.”
Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, your body started to convulse, your muscles tensing, and then unraveling. Your orgasm ripped through you, causing you to thrash, and scream. You felt your pussy clench tightly around his length, the euphoria making your mind hazy. Neteyam's body trembled, his cock twitching as he spilled inside you. His seed filled you entirely, warming your belly, and dripping out onto your thighs as he pulled out slowly.
You were spent, too weak to move and too dazed to think straight. Time passed fast, the loss of his body heat lost in your head. You felt him shift beside you, his head dangling over yours as he peppered kisses onto your face. “You’re so pretty all fucked out…” he cooed, his hand gently rubbing your head.
You murmured something in reply, not fully hearing what he was saying. “I’m so happy you’re here with me, yawne.”Neteyam spoke, his voice soft. You heard his voice echo through the room, the words becoming jumbled as sleep overtook you. He continued petting your hair, watching you sleep peacefully. This was nice, harder than he expected, but it was nice.
“And you’re going to be here with me forever…”
My beloveds - @xylianasblog @strongheartneteyam @criticallybella
#neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan#neteyam sully#neteyam x avatar!reader#neteyam x f!reader#neteyam x reader#neteyam x you#neteyam x y/n#neteyam smut#neteyam fic#neteyam fanfiction#atwow smut#atwow fic#atwow x reader
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such a good puppy
pairing: kirishima eijiro x reader
summary: eijiro opens up and tells you he’s into pet play. you’d never given it a thought, so you say you’re willing to try. fluffy smut follows.
tags: aged-up characters; bf!eijiro; pup!eijiro; fem!reader; pet play; puppy play; puppy hood & harness; fluff and smut; praise (m receiving); oral sex (f receiving); tearing clothing; manhandling; strength kink; kiri is a golden retriever in human form, this was bound to happen at some point
Eijiro is on his hands and knees before you in nothing but a chest harness and a black and red puppy hood, panting with bright, crimson eyes. Your heart swells and your knees go a little weak seeing the love in his gaze.
When he first told you, he expected shock and disgust. Rejection. There was a reason he hadn’t dated much despite being in his mid twenties, and this thing he kept in hiding was a large part of it.
“Oh!” you’d said with a look of surprise.
Clearly it wasn’t something you’d expected, but you hadn’t rejected him outright. You were quiet, almost painfully so, gathering your thoughts.
“You know, sweetheart… it’s never something I've considered, but we can talk about it. I’m so thankful you trust me enough to tell me,” you’d said with a gentle smile.
Butterflies filled his stomach. He could have cried. In fact, he almost did, heat prickling at the corners of his eyes before he could stop it. “R-really? We can?”
“Of course. I want to see you happy and fulfilled. If that’s something you want, I see no harm in trying it.”
That was almost four months ago. You never expected your heart to skip the first time he slipped on his neoprene puppy hood just days later in a moment where curiosity met vulnerability, but it did. You never thought your thighs would grow hot, your cheeks would flush, or your thoughts would race seeing his broad chest fill out a leather harness with the sweetest look in his eye, but god did they ever.
It hadn’t dawned on you yet how fluid all of this could be, that something as small as a piece of gear or a few choice praises would not change the way Eijiro fucked you - used you - if and when the mood struck. Now that you’d experienced it, just the thought of how he’d moan and lose himself, relentlessly taking what he wanted with a little encouragement and a tug on his harness made you blush.
And now you’re here.
“That's my good boy,” you say in a cheery voice. You scratch his chin and lean down to give him a kiss on the head.
He’s nuzzling into your bare thigh, the heat of his lips beneath the red muzzle sending goosebumps across your skin as he places excited, sloppy kisses up your leg. Eijiro is so animated that - even as you feel a wet ache pooling in your body - you have to giggle at his playfulness, and he loves it. He’s following the warmth of your skin as you back away slightly.
Soon, you’re up against a wall and Eijiro has you trapped while he’s on his knees, mouthing his way up your thigh and over the thin fabric covering your cunt with a low groan that vibrates through your core. He rips your panties apart before tossing them aside, taking one thigh onto his shoulder. The way he savors your body with his mouth and his thick fingers as he stares up at you has you dripping and trembling around him faster than you’d care to admit. You grind your hips into his embrace as your climax hits and you moan his name, praising him over and over with the few words you can form.
“Y’such a good boy, fuck, Ei. ‘M so proud of you, makin’ me cum so hard. My big, sweet puppy,” you say, running a hand over his head as he pushes into your touch.
His eyes are hooded with lust as he looks back to you without a word, waiting for direction. You look down at him, still in a bit of a haze.
“Gonna keep bein’ good for me, sweetie?” You already know the answer just by the mischief coloring his eyes as you speak.
A low growl falls out of his throat as he snarls at you.
“Oh, really now? Is that so?” you reply, your smile growing.
Eijiro answers by hauling you over his shoulder and carrying you to the bedroom.
It would seem that today, you are his pretty toy, and he’s come out to play.
#cleaning out my drafts#aged up characters#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#boku no hero#millennialmagicalgirl#bnha smut#mha smut#kirishima eijirou#kirishima x reader#fem!reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#smut
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How would huge cock!R initially meet Natty?
Or maybe Giselle, Natty, and Joy all have R on as an "assistant" and take turns every so often? ;P
Damn, dude, you really took my answer to give me a more challenging ask...well, challenge accepted 🫡 Let's see what my brain craftes this time lol
So, idols are human too, right? They also have their needs and sex is, of course, one of them, but fucking is not enough, no, they need THE fuck. The one that blows their minds and relieves all their stress and anxieties.
Natty, few days before her debut, was clearly so stressed and also panicking a bit; she needed a bit of leisure, so she went alone to this nice pub near her dorm. She was having a drink and scanning all the guys in the place for fun: too short, too elegant, that one looks like a criminal...
In short no one got her attention... except you. You were normal-looking, but, damn, the bulge in your pants made her gasp so hard, that she had to have a chat with you. And, well, the chat was basically flirting with you from the first second. Another couple of drinks and you two were in the bathroom stall, making out and ready to fuck. And you would have done that, but first she needed to have a taste of that beast you were hiding in your pants.
Unzipped your pants, she pulled your cock out and immediately took it in her mouth, her lips pressing hard on your huge cock, while her hand was massaging her balls. It was hard for you to resist to such a slut, so you collected her hair in a loose ponytail and you used it to facefuck her, ruining her make-up and filling her stomach with your first shot of cum.
But it was not over, the thai slut was still needy of your fantastic cock; so you sat on the toilette and let Natty move over you. You could clearly tell that she was a dancer because of her core and legs strenght. She was bouncing, no, she was impaling herself on your with so much strenght, that her big boobs came out from her tiny top, making her bounce right in your face. But she didn't care at all, because your cock was giving her so much pleasure that she reached her orgasm so fast, releasing her juices all over your cock, that was keeping to fuck her through the climax, making her body have spasms, until you cum too.
That was THE fuck for her, so obviously she took your number, in order to fuck you even after her debut. And over the numerous times you two meet to fuck, you really tried everything: titfucking, anal, 69 and the list is still long. And soon the voices about you and your huge cock started to circulate...
Did you know what they say about SM idols? That the are the best to take care of their body. So, how could Joy not give you a chance? She was very bubbly and cheery from the beginning but, damn, if in bed she was nasty. She would spit out such harsh words while you were basically ravaging her. "Yeah, fuck this pussy with that disgusting cock, it's the only thing you are good, you would be nothing without that", it's an example of the things she has said to you, but, once again, you were fucking her so good, that her brain would be too blurred to compose a sentence. Once you were done tho, she would return to be all cuddly and sweet. "Aww, baby, you fucked me so good, you are amazing", she would say with her arms around your neck.
And do you know else is in SM? Exactly, Giselle. She had to try too the fantastic good that her unnie suggested her. And she was so glad about thrusting that suggestion because no one before trusted in her ass with the intensity you had. You not only had an huge cock, but you were also so talented in fucking silly the slutty idols like her, putting them in their places if they were acting bratty, filling their holes with your sticky hot cum.
#kpop smut#kpop thoughts#girl group smut#kpop x male reader#girl groups x male reader#red velvet x male reader#red velvet smut#red velvet joy#joy smut#joy x male reader#kiss of life x male reader#kiss of life smut#kiss of life natty#natty x male reader#natty smut#aespa x male reader#aespa smut#aespa giselle#giselle smut#giselle x male reader
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letters to my favourite author.
in which, within the darkest times of your struggles, a secret yet admiring fan is there for you.
contents. unknown bllk character (revealed towards the end, check tags if you want to know beforehand) x gn!reader | fluff | 6.591k words | writer!reader | self esteem issues | one argument (reader and isagi are harsh) | slowburn (?) | isagi is your childhood friend
a/n. thank you to yumi and ray for the help !
"I wanna be a writer."
It's summer of your final year of primary school, radiant sun sinking into the horizon, vibrant hues of orange bleeding out into the sky. The taste of soda lingers in your mouth, drops of the melted ice block gently plop onto your skin, the cold sensation makes you jolt a bit.
"Really?" Yoichi, the boy who's been by your side since forever piques with fascination. He pauses from eagerly sucking on his popsicle, turning towards you with his azure eyes, interest blazing within them.
You nod, ignoring part of the melted ice block dribbling down your chin. "Miss told me I was really good at it, she said to write everyday, I like stories. I don't want to stop making or reading them when we're adults." The liquid smeared onto your face remains neglected, as your heart begins pounding at your teacher's words.
"This is amazing, you have to keep writing. I want to read so much more."
It's not like the first time you've been complimented, but being called good at a game or sport can't even compare to someone craving more of what you created. There's an indescribable sense of pride heating up in your chest, maybe one day you could even write something, something that has people glued to every word on the page, something that someone couldn't resist putting down; something that's like the books you stay up reading.
You've finally found it, the soccer to your Yoichi, what you want to continue doing for the rest of your life, what you want to dedicate your life to.
"I think it's awesome! Your stories are always read out in class. You could beat Detective Conan!" He's too engrossed in this new found dream of yours, not even noticing the melting ice block in his hand, coating it with sticky syrup.
"Yocchan that'll never happen… All stories are beautiful, it's not like soccer where you have to be 'better'." Despite telling him off, another smile creeps up on your lips, with your best friend's support and teacher's encouragement, this new objective of yours seemed attainable. Either way, you were determined to work hard and persist no matter what.
Yoichi's hand grasps yours, the joyous glint remaining in his eyes. "Doesn't matter, I'll be the best striker and you'll be the best writer! Promise?"
"Promise." And with confident grins scrawled on your expressions, you race home, popsicles long gone and forgotten, melted away in the suffocating heat.
"Y/n, what the fuck is this?"
The cursing and vexation threaded into his voice and tone catch you off guard, a complete juxtaposition of the peaceful atmosphere of the classroom, with now only you and Yoichi there, soaked in the comfortable sunlight. Gold stains the room as cheery exclamations can be heard in the distance, as students rush to their after-school plans.
"What's wrong?" Your lips curve into a frown, scavenging through memories in an attempt to figure out what's wrong. Though you'd been struggling recently, none of those issues translated to your friendship with him. "Did something happen?"
"Oh my fucking god, I'm talking about this crap." He slams a sheet on the closest desk— yours. It's your career path form. You recognise your own handwriting, the occupations "psychology" and "law" written as the main two paths you're interested in.
"What about it?" You're still not sensing the issue here. "It's my future, I'm interested in those paths." There's a puzzled expression as you wonder, why Yoichi was so annoyed at the degrees you might want to study, it's not like you're altering his life.
Your confusion only seemed to amplify his anger. "What the hell happened to writing? Weren't you supposed to become an author?" So this is what this was about.
"It's just a hobby. Other jobs make more money anyways-"
"Fucking hell, since when did you care so much about money?"
You don't. Obviously money matters significantly within one's life, but you're not striving to be filthy rich. Realistically, studying at university would bring a lot more success than writing, at least, not at how you are currently.
"Yocchan— I still need to make a living, I can't make much out of being an author—."
"So? You haven't even tried."
Because it's obvious it'll never work. "Writing isn't a career I can succeed in, I mean, just look at Haru. Someone like them. Or anyone else I know who writes." "Haru"'s a friend of yours, one that you met on the website you frequently post your works, among plenty of other writers you've befriended. They're popular, only being on for a few months and managing to rack up thousands of likes, as well as plenty of followers.
You're over the moon for how well they do, you truly are, but it doesn't and can't stop the envy and insecurity creeping up on you; a fatal disease slowly infecting you, tainting you with overwhelming jealousy.
You can't help it, not even their account makes your achievements look pathetic and insignificant; if Haru were to have an off day and receive less attention on any of their uploads, it'd amount to what you get on a good day, actually, probably even more.
"Oh. My. God. Haru this, Haru that, you don't see me getting upset about Hiori or Kurona everyday do you?" Yoichi scowls, seemingly getting more upset at you and this whole ordeal. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."
"Sports and writing aren't the same. You wouldn't get it." He really wouldn't. In soccer you can practise the same kick over and over again, until it really drills into muscle memory. But when writing, you can't rewrite the same metaphor, or simile, or anything really, then be able to write something beautiful. Repetition can't save an author.
"Fine—, but one thing I understand is having a dream." That day twelve years old you announced your new life goal of becoming an author flits through your mind, and gosh you'd do anything for that oblivion, the oblivion of how harsh reality is, the oblivion that provides innocence the privilege of dreaming freely.
"You don't get it, writing needs talent." Or whatever the hell it is, because no matter how much effort you put in and how much wellbeing you sacrifice, there's always someone doing better; attracting more attention, more compliments and more love.
"And you have it. I know how you and Haru write, you're equally good, actually, your writing's so much more interesting. Talent isn't the fucking issue, it's you and how you're not trying enough"
"You're only saying that because you're too stupid to differentiate." Guilt is quick to stab you in the stomach, and you're already feeling the consequences and hurt of your words, as if they were targeted towards you.
Yoichi only scoffs. "And you're too fucking sad and undisciplined to work hard." And he's wrong. Completely. Yet it's salt to the wound, to be perceived in such an ugly manner by someone so valuable to you. “I have training now. Bye.”
You're mustering a response, wanting to apologise, beg for forgiveness; whilst desperately finding the right words to defend yourself. Yoichi doesn't give you a chance to respond, as he leaves, you notice the frustrated grit of his teeth and how even his footsteps sound livid.
"Yocchan—"
You follow, unsure of what you want to do. You want to cry, but you also want to scream out of rage. You're doing your best to chase him down the corridor, your legs are tempted to give out from the sheer emotional torment the argument was; yet you insist on pushing through the discomfort.
Yoichi's long gone by now, either sprinting home or running to the comfort of his soccer team.
As a sigh of defeat leaves your lips you return to the classroom for your stuff, chewing on the inside of your mouth out of frustration, not caring about the consequences nor the ulcers that'd appear there in a few days.
Fights are normal, they're inevitable in all kinds of relationships. They're not foreign to you and Yoichi considering how you've been friends since diapers, you both put the effort in communicating afterwards, and knew how to properly apologise.
But not once has Yoichi ever sworn at you like that.
It's immature to ignore issues instead of making an attempt to resolve them, but if you keep telling yourself to focus on going home for now, you can deal with your emotions once you were okay physically.
The pencil case returns to your bag, and your books are about until you notice the post-it stuck on it, sky blue with thin writing resembling fish bones.
Hello [username]
I've enjoyed reading your works for a long time now, they're such fascinating pieces that I find myself rereading and staying up late for.
I know I had no right to eavesdrop, however it was not intentional in the slightest. I don't think you and Haru are comparable. They may have more followers but your ideas and there their execution are a lot more beautiful in my eyes. Popularity, followers, and likes don't define you, or anyone.
I can tell you work hard I respect and admire it but take care of yourself. You take priority.
As you finish reading the pale blue post-it, you finally register the sense of dread.
The words are sweet, they're wholesome and what you've needed to hear for so long. Roses of warm comfort bloom within your heart at the sight of someone acknowledging the effort you put in.
But thorns of trepidation remind you that someone knows your online alias; someone at school nonetheless.
Ah.
You're screwed.
Your online presence has always been a secret, for the better. Someone discovering all the love stories you posted online would simply be embarrassing, that's for your follower's eyes and theirs only.
Normally you'd ignore the message, and just pray they don't decide to reveal your identity.
Yet you find the pen in your hand dancing across a piece of paper.
[To the light blue post-it, thank you so much ! It's really appreciated]
Then you don't stop there, pinning it onto the class noticeboard with a push pin. What were you thinking? Or expecting? You weren't exactly sure, and found this trivial attempt at contacting a stranger foolish, yet you still give your message displayed on your board the last hopeful look, before going home.
By the next day, your note was nowhere to be seen. And this time, instead of a post-it, it’s a pale blue envelope, carefully slid between your notebooks.
"And here, with the context of the Egalitarian and feminist era, we can tell…" The teacher's words are drowned by your fascination with the letter, as you carefully open it, ensuring only you get to witness the contents.
Hello again
i'm I'm glad to hear that my words could mean something to you. It's an honour for you to respond, I wasn't expecting anything back. I hope after yesterday you feel better, even if it's the slightest bit.I've been re-reading your stuff a lot recently, especially on the bus, train and before sleeping.
It's oddly weird, I never liked reading. I can't seem to find books that I don't give up on. Even so I never thought I would read romance. I always thought it’d be a bit uncomfortable to read.
I don't have much time since I've been busy, but if you have the time I'd like to receive a letter back. As long as it's from your heart. It's a lot for just a follower to ask. But I find you as interesting as your writing. If you're okay with sending a response can you slip it in the very last locker in our class? It's unused so it works for now.
There's a faint tinge of disappointment at them remaining anonymous, but it's cancelled out by the overwhelming joy tugging your lips into a smile.
Someone likes your writing enough to put the effort into a letter.
You still continue to ignore the teacher, tearing out a page of your English book, eagerly writing a response for whoever this. The now familiar blossom of warmth is back, you could almost start giggling at how exhilarating you found this all.
The pen skims across the torn out page, your reply gradually materialising. The world around you is completely dismissed, right now it's only you and the letter.
It's not until your teacher snaps at you, demanding your attention, earning a quick switch in demeanour; from accumulating excitement to fabricated focus and a feigned interest in classic texts.
Have you made up with Isagi?
Your heart drops at the mention of Yoichi in today’s letter, nails digging into your palm with frustration; because the answer to the question is no.
I'm not trying to intrude, but you should try to if you haven't (it looks like you haven't talked about it yet). Fighting is normal among people, but it's dangerous if you don't do something about it quickly.
With time, it can become irrepairable irreparable. And I don't want you to go through that with someone you care about cherish.
It's been around a week, a week of these note and letter exchanges, slipping them into the empty locker. Lately, you've found yourself patiently waiting for their messages to appear alongside your possessions. They didn’t always write letters, if they didn't have time it was a post-it note instead, either one had you fully engrossed, clinging onto every word written.
I can't really offer advice. It might be a bit scary but anyone can tell you and Isagi care about each other a lot. He looks upset at training. You seem to be the same during class too.
And they're right, ever since that heated exchange of untruthful words in the classroom, Yoichi's been avoiding you. Eyes avoiding yours, opting to eat with his soccer teammates instead, and the absence of time spent together leaves you feeling empty.
So don't beat yourself up about over it. Stress and anger can make you say things you don't mean. I know you'll be able to fix things.
They're right again. You didn't mean to call Yoichi stupid; all the insecurity and doubt had been accumulating recently, internalised with the suppression of expressing yourself, it had gotten to a point you couldn't control it. As a consequence, you unwillingly took it out on Yoichi, he retaliated and the pointless argument left both of you hurt.
A few glances of the classroom inform you that he's not here, either out speaking to someone in a different class or at a meeting for soccer. You ask Bachira, a teammate of Yoichi's.
"Hm? Isagi and Rin had to go do something, it might be about the upcoming game." Bachira pauses for a moment, pondering what exactly it might've been about. "Somethin' about them having to figure out who plays striker, probably." A quick thank you sends him buzzing away, on this way to go bother Kunigami.
After school it is.
Time passes rapidly, as you're preoccupied with selecting a work in progress to continue, brainstorming the potential trajectory of the events. Mechanical pencil rushes over paper, transcribing your thoughts into potential story. It's not until the bell drags you back to reality, as Yoichi calls out to you. Speak of the devil.
"Can we talk? After school and at our usual place?"
You nod "Was going to ask you the same." The convenience of how the two of you always seem to be aligned would've earnt a grin, if only it wasn't for such a serious and uncomfortable topic.
He reciprocates the nod, returning to his desk, as you fail to ignore the creeping dread ensnaring your heart.
You're not quite sure what you're exactly so worried about.
It's either:
a) Possibilities of another argument occurring, with the recent avoidance and discomfort, it’ll be worse than last time. It’s likely, given how tense the atmosphere was yesterday, regret and hurt lingering in the air yet simultaneously suffocating you.
b) The tiny sliver of chance that Yoichi wants to stop being your friend, rather than talk about the argument. Although this outcome is unlikely with how close you are, paranoia couldn't care less about logic and rationality.
c) Being unable to articulate your recent inner turmoil and conflict. Despite your passion for interpreting your thoughts and emotions into fiction, it feels impossible to explain yourself to Yoichi; words getting stuck in your throat and choking on the bitter self doubt.
Maybe it’ll be a combination of the three. Struggles with communication melt into another heated dispute, which would then solidify into a heavy burden within your heart, as Yoichi decides your insecurity is intolerable and disappears from your life.
You shake off the thought, as you make your way to where you’d always hang out with Yoichi; the rooftop. It’s prohibited for all students but with enough messing around you had managed to pick the lock, every break period invested on it was worth it; within the hours spent in school the pale cerulean and cotton like clouds were only for you two, accompanied by the wind playing with your hair.
By the time you arrive, Yoichi’s already there.
You analyse every crevice of his face, searching for any emotion and attempting to map out his thoughts. His eyebrows are slightly furrowed, and his arms are crossed, leaning against the fence.
“Yoi-,”
“I’m so sorry.”
And he doesn’t give you the opportunity or time to respond.
“I don’t know what I was saying, I know better than anyone else that you’re always working hard. Heck you probably spend more time writing than anything else. I didn’t mean anything I said last week, ‘m so sorry, I don’t know why but I was angry and took it out on you.”
It almost all comes out as a whine, not the kind with a bratty tone but the kind that an apologetic child would have as they cry. It’s not out of character, he’s always been a bit of a crybaby, especially as a kid, bawling at the slightest jump scare or change in weather. With how much older you are now, you’ve almost forgotten this side of Yoichi, it’s easy to grow used to the sharp tongued and brutal character he now adopts when on field.
“Those are my words… I said everything that day because I was anxious, not because I meant anything.” Relief washes over you and you’ve never relished in it so much. “I’m sorry for taking it out on you…” There’s a slight pout in his cheeks as he pulls you in for a hug.
“You were kind of right though.” Before you can refute he keeps going. “I don’t understand all those weird English techniques, and to be honest I still google a lot of the words you use because they’re too complicated.”
“But even then, I know your writing’s amazing. I was worried. I thought you had given up on it entirely, all because you think Haru’s better. It’s— I don’t want you to give up because you think you’re not good enough—, because you are. Writing to you is like soccer to me, I can’t imagine what it’d be like if either of us quit. But if writing doesn’t make you happy anymore I’ll respect it. Or if you’re not aiming to do it professionally.”
As kind as his words were, it doesn’t loosen the grip insecurity has on you. It doesn’t change how others have so much of what you want; Paragraphs of praise instead of the short, brief and shallow compliments, popularity; As Haru hit impressive milestones you were wondering why some of your works got so neglected. Everytime you hear him make some sort of self-deprecating comment, crescents of frustration being dug into your palms; because he’ll always have people waiting for his posts, typing out long paragraphs eulogising everything he writes. It doesn’t exactly matter how much he doubts himself, people will shower him in praise either way. It seems a bit hateful, but it can't be helped with how you'd do anything to receive even a fraction of the love he gets.
You have someone like that, remember? The letters come to mind, they’re a foreign yet comforting presence.
Writing is such a significant component of you, yet it leaves you feeling so empty at times. But even if there’s one person; someone who only knows you by your writing and willing to support you purely based on that.
Someone, is better than no one.
Although Yoichi’s been supporting you from the day you started writing, that's a different story, Yoichi has your friendship, the creator of the letters doesn’t.
“You’re worrying over nothing.” It’s far from nothing. There’s still uncertainty in the confidence of your work, you’ll probably never eliminate the grasp of jealousy asphyxiating you each time you notice the difference in feedback and attention in comparison to your friends. Maybe it’d be better for you to quit, to move on from that silly little dream you declared to follow as a kid, and accept that some dreams will always remain as dreams. “I’m still passionate about it, but I’m interested in other things too.”
“I understand,” His pout is replaced by a grin. “Whatever you choose to pick ‘m always here for you, ‘kay?
Tell him. Tell him how the sight of your friends’ success leaves you and your heart thirsty for the same love and attention they receive regularly. Tell him—
“Of course you are, you’re my best friend.” —instead comes out. “You always will be.” You’ll tell him another day. Probably.
Tick. Tock.
The clock in the kitchen reminds of you every passing second, as you're quietly bringing and preparing a drink for the night. You quickly re-read today's letter, getting ready to write out a response
I know you already told me that you and Isagi made up, but has the topic of the argument gotten better?
It might be a bit invasive to ask about it, but I'm worried. I'm an athlete, and I know it's different to being a writer. But what I do understand is what it's like for someone to seem so much better and out of reach. There's a lot of doubt and you start to question why you're even trying.
I can't guarantee results, but I like revisiting my favourite parts of my sport. It helps remember why you started. Sometimes we care too much about others' opinions and forget who we are.
When and why did you start writing? What's your favourite part of it? What made you love it so much? (There's no need to feel obligated to answer these. They've just helped me a lot and I hope they can help you too.)
Please remember you're enough. You always have and will be. You're more than enough.
Drawing in a sharp breath, you stare at those words, relishing in the soothing solace of their kindness. Unknowingly you've craved that saccharine emotion for so long, despite not asking for it or expressing the struggles burdening you.
Before you know it, your pen's gliding across the page, you're engrossed in completing a response, expressing your gratitude for his goodwill.
To be honest, I'd love to become an author. I love the idea of having a book. The thought of having my words printed with a cover, and bought and enjoyed by others brings me indescribable joy. But I'm scared. It's a risky career for anyone, but I'm scared it'll be like my presence online; almost non-existent.
You blink a couple of times. Conveying your thoughts wasn't even that hard, yet you struggled so much to tell anyone else, not even being able to muster an attempt.
But your subtle confusion evaporates, as you continue the letter, everything else disappears, including your worries. While the hours pass, it's just you, the letters and your racing heart.
xx / xx / 23
Your recent work was compelling. The confession was my favourite part, I enjoyed how it wasn't perfect. It's unrealistic and gets boring when they're perfect. I know that's the purpose of fiction but a bit of realism is appreciated. You always achieve the right balance, something that seems impossible to happen, yet believable and not weirdly convenient. I had a lot of fun reading it on my way to school this morning, thank you.
A letter from this morning, a couple of hours after posting.
xx / xx / 23
Training was a bit longer than usual, but I wanted to say good luck for our upcoming exam. I hope maths isn't too bad for you. The topics we're going over seemed tricky… You'll be fine though, you're always studying hard when you're supposed to.
Before the maths exam from the other day, the one that everyone was panicking over.
xx / xx / 23
This is for you. You mentioned craving it last night. Hope you enjoy it.
The day after you posted on a whim "I feel like royal milk tea and idfk why."
The notes, both the latest one and a few from the past days are enough to earn a verbal reaction from you, "Oh my god— I adore them so much." Beaming, you re-read the notes a couple of times, savouring their feedback and sincerity. A few were carried around, while the rest remained safe either at home or in your locker.
Yoichi pauses from sipping on his drink. "They're still writing to you? You really are popular." He shuffles a bit closer, "Wow, they even went far as getting a drink for you. It's already been a few months."
"They already read my recent post too." You're already writing back, depicting your appreciation for their feedback. "That was quick though, I posted it before leaving the house and they had already written a response by the time I got to class."
"Hm." Yoichi hums a bit, gazing up at the sky and swallowing a piece of his onigiri. "How'd they find out it was you, only I know your username, you don't use your real name as your alias, and you're not public about writing as a whole. I can't guess anyone on our team, but that's the only clue we have, right?"
You nod, "They're also in our class." Too many questions and no answers. "I should ask them in my response."
He pulls out his phone, opening the notes app and typing the only two clues you have. "Right, but making a guess should be fun. It's a bit like all those general ability tests our parents made us practice, no? C'mon we'll figure something out if we work together."
"Why not." You recall everyone in your class. "Soccer team and in our class, aside from you there's Bachira, Kunigami, Yukimiya, Reo, Rin, Otoya and Chigiri."
"Well first we can eliminate—"
"Bachira." To his amusement you finish this sentence.
"Yup, I don't think he's physically capable of reading, or writing legibly. Besides, he'd be straightforward about it. If it was him everyone would've found your account by now." So that limits the possibilities to six people.
"Kunigami doesn't seem into reading either."
"He isn't, if he's not at soccer training he's either at the gym, eating or sleeping. There's no way it's Otoya, he only talks to people he wants to date, and does it straightforwardly " You'd question what kind of person would behave like that, but for now you'll save it for another day.
"Reo studies and reads a lot, doesn't he?" That would explain how they rectified any errors.
"Business and economics related books mainly, but he reads fiction too. He could've gotten his dad to pay someone to find you. Something like that."
"…" The soccer team was certainly a unique group.
"It's definitely possible it's him. But he would've been extra about it, I mean he's the heir of the Mikage Corp, 'course he'd do something extravagant as a fan. Who else again?"
"Rin, and Yukimiya, oh and Chigiri."
"100% Yukimiya. I guarantee you. If not, then Chigiri." Yoichi, then that's not a 100% guarantee, but you keep that thought to yourself.
"I thought Yukimiya would hate reading, since he said art strains his eyes."
"He reads as a hobby. So does Chigiri. Rin only likes horror, all your works are romance."
"Can't you just ask?" As fun as attempting to deduce who the fan was, your curiosity couldn't be contained.
Yoichi shrugs. "It'd be awkward if we're wrong. You'd rather not risk someone else finding your account."
"Wonderful point." You glance at your phone and notice the time, break's about to end. "Let's get out of here, before we get caught."
"I don't wanna go to maths… Not on a Monday afternoon please—" Those were his last words before you dragged him back to class.
"Wait, where's my phone?"
It's finally Friday, the conclusion of the week and the long awaited weekend. You had just left the school to go out for dinner with Yoichi and Bachira, until you realised its absence from its usual pocket in your bag.
"You must've left it in the classroom." Yoichi asks, "Bachira and I can wait here for you. Or I can go run up to get it for you."
"No it's fine, the place is nearby anyways. I'll meet you there."
Either of them don't get the opportunity to protest, rushing back into the building and up the stairs. How inconvenient of you to lose your phone, especially on the one day you're dying to leave immediately.
You finally arrive at your classroom, but there's someone already there, hood concealing their face, despite it being summer.
And they're at your desk.
"What the hell—" You waste no time, sprinting to your desk and grasping their hood, pulling it off and exposing their face, whilst having a grip on their wrist.
A shocked gasp leaves their lips; your name, but instead of your real one it's the one you use online. Is he—?
Adorned with captivating and noticeable eye lashes, alluring, deep beryl eyes stare right back at yours. Accompanying them on the pale canvas of his skin were faint pink and glossy lips. His teal hair's a bit messy, almost covering his eyes and contrasting the soft rose dusted on his cheeks
He's ethereal.
"Itoshi…Rin?"
The silence is loud, neither of you knowing what to say.
With the release of his wrist, you decide to break the silence.
"You're the one who's been writing letters to me?" Now that you've registered the surprise and who he is, you notice the sky blue envelope in his other hand, confirming your suspicions.
"Guess I got caught."
"Wait, that doesn't make sense—? I never told you about my account."
"I know you didn't." He responds verbally, voice hoarse and raspy. "I recognised your writing style after seeing sir show the class your writing."
That was from a year ago. "You knew me from that?"
"And some intuition. Whenever you made a post rambling about something at school, it matched up with whatever was happening here. So I took the risk and wrote that note." You're still in disbelief, Itoshi Rin, popular with his seemingly permanent stoicism, wrote all those affectionate words.
"To be honest, I know it would've been better to approach you normally. But I'm not—." He pauses, before continuing, roughly stuffing the envelope in his pocket. "I'm not like Yukimiya or Karasu, I can't express myself well through words and I was a bit worried." That explained his anonymity.
"Every time I read whatever you write, letter or not, I love it. A lot. I found your writing through a mis-click and I don't regret anything, your works are so addictive." There it is again, the sweet, warm words that sooth your scars and hurt.
"I like you, a lot. Though I can't say for sure if I love you, but I know I am with your writing. I want to talk about how much I cherish you and your hard work, instead of expressing it through a letter. I like the expression you make when you're focused, or how you smile while eating your favourite foods." Sunlight drenches the two of you in warmth, colouring the classroom gold.
The sun isn't the only reason why you feel so hot.
It's so infatuating, despite him not being a close friend at all. The way he speaks of you and your writing so highly. Your heart's pounding against your chest, begging for more of him.
"I don't want us to be just writer and fan. I want to grow close to you, and eventually end up as lovers." Rin's face is a bright red with embarrassment, averting his gaze from you. "Gosh, your writing is almost as pretty as you."
It almost feels like a dream, to finally feel some reassurance of your insecurities, even if Rin had been sending you letters and notes for the past few months. Something tells you to be a bit daring. "May I?" Your fingers reach up to his face.
It catches him off guard, and the flustered expression on his face is adorable as he nods. His hair's soft, as you brush it away from his eyes.
"Rin, I'd love that. You've been my lighthouse, I've felt so lost recently and those words you left me saved me." You're already regretting using a metaphor in regular conversation, but it's what you do best, even if it is embarrassing to say it verbally. "If it weren't for you, I think I would've quit writing entirely."
It was completely unfamiliar to you, for someone to praise you with that much effort, to finally have a source of comfort that seems to understand the relentless storm of self doubt; yet you can't imagine things without Rin anymore.
What has this boy done to you.
"It was my intention to prevent that." Despite him maintaining his calm and cold tone, he's still blushing heavily. "I'll be your lighthouse for as long as you'll allow me to then."
You joke around a bit, amused at his words. "I guess you'll be by my side forever then."
"That'd be ideal, sweetheart."
He relishes the growing blush on your face, chuckling at leaving you speechless and flustered.
"I can't believe you out of all people would do that. Why the hell would you gaslight me?"
"Listen, I didn't gaslight you."
"Lies, Isagi Yoichi, you're the reason my phone went missing that day." His lips curve into a delighted grin, as he helps you carry the heavy boxes.
"I was setting you up with the love of your life."
"You also knew the letters were his. You tried to convince me it was Yukimiya or Chigiri." Books are placed onto the shelf.
"I was trying to surprise you, I can't believe you didn't notice that. Didn't you find it weird how we spoke about the argument the same day the letter mentioned it, and after Rin spoke to me? Dude you ditched Bachira and I for him—" More books now. "You've grown up so much though— I can't believe you've publishing a book and you're in university already."
"You're literally the same age as me."
"I was born a few months earlier."
"Yet I'm taller." The faux offense on his expression is priceless.
Before he retaliates, you're called out to by a few people.
"y/n!" It's Reo, followed by the rest of his team, most you recognise, Nagi, Chigiri, and Yukimiya.
"Long time no see!" Violet hair tied up and with his expensive outfit, he looks like he's going to a business conference rather than meeting up with an old classmate. "Congratulations, it's doing really well already. You should've told me you've been writing since high school, I would've loved proofreading for you."
"Thanks, but aren't you guys busy with training?" Rin mentioned a few important and upcoming games.
"I have my priorities. I really loved the fireworks chapter—"
"124-136." Nagi butts in.
"Hm?"
"The page numbers. If it was really your favourite you would've recognised them." Not even you, the author remember that. "You're a fake fan Reo."
"Congratulations." Ignoring Nagi doubting Reo's 'loyalty' as a fan, Chigiri approaches you with a smile, a copy of your book in hand. "Mind signing my copy?"
With a thanks and a nod, your pen (Yoichi insisted on you keeping it at all times) glides along the cover, producing your autograph.
"Someone's popular." A familiar and raspy voice comments—, it's Rin. "Sorry for being late, Coach was being annoying. Did I miss anything?" Similarly to Reo, he's overdressed for the situation, covered in designer brands.
Chigiri scoffs. "You never apologise for being late to practise."
"Shut up princess." The nickname makes Chigiri chuckle, joining whatever chaos Reo started, muttering a comment about love birds under his breath.
"Rin, you already know you didn't have to come— Yoichi and I were only helping Anri restock."
His arms wrap around you from behind, head resting on your shoulder. "I'd rather be with you than train." Rin's hair tickles your cheek as he places a kiss on it. "I knew you could do it." Pride is laced with his voice, almost as if he was talking about one of his soccer games.
"It's thanks to you."
"Bullshit. You're the one who took the initiative to send your manuscript, you're the one who spent hours working on it, you're the one who didn't give up. My support can't compare."
A lot of things come to mind. The initial letters and notes, which became him bringing your favourite foods and drinks during your all your writing sessions. Rin was always there, ensuring you never overworked yourself, proofreading every word and providing his input and feedback. He even went as far as utilising his and his team's fame to assist with the promotion.
"It still meant the world to me. And it still does." Despite it being a regular way of him being affectionate, it still manages to make your face heat up, probably colouring them pink by now.
Though it's been years, there's still a bit of uncertainty. Even with a published book, it's scary knowing that it's out there for criticism.
"You're going to be okay." Rin, as always, notices the change in mood, hand caressing yours. "I'm always going to be by your side."
"I know just— it's so weird." It's surreal how you went from contemplating giving up writing to signing something you wrote from scratch. "I'll probably have to make alt accounts just in case of hate comments."
"Don't think you have to worry about that, Reo already sued some people. Pretty sure Isagi and Nagi stay up fighting people online. So don't worry about anything happening, we're all here to support you, you're my favourite and I love you." He concludes his speech with a peck on the lips, ignoring everyone who recognises him. "Let's get out of here."
"Wait, aren't we having dinner with everyone?"
"Change of plans, I only want to spend my money on you." Rin's already walking out the store, holding you hand. "You said you wanted to try Kobe beef, no?"
"Fine— you win." A high school reunion will have to wait for another day.
From milk tea to infamous and expensive beef, it's sweet how he things have changed yet have still remained heart warming, just like how he went from fan to lover.
tagging : @yuzurins
© kitorin : do not repost, plagiarize, change, or translate
#I HAD TO GET IT OUT OF THE WAY#now i can focus on school#unless i hyperfixate on another wip#bllk x y/n#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#bllk#fluff#blue lock x male reader#blue lock x you#blue lock x y/n#itoshi rin#bllk itoshi rin#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi rin x male reader#itoshi rin x gn!reader
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Cheater
Summary: When finally toe to toe with Daryl after him cheating, you are given answers you rightfully deserve
A/N: First wanted to say this fic was inspired by @starrydixon 's fic, i legit got so angsty that i wanted to write my own and my own little interpretation of it, so definitely go read theirs <3. But enjoy this complete mess i made in literally 2 hours lmao.
Warnings: Cheating and angst
Word count: 2.1K
You stood in front of him like a deer in headlights, you were terrified to even speak. The Daryl Dixon, the asshole, the cheater, the love of your life was standing in front of you, something you promised never to let happen again. This is the first time you had been in the same room after the incident, after he had told you the thing that ruined your entire life.
Part of you wished he would’ve just kept it to himself, letting you live out your perfect love life with him but part of you was so glad he told you. You would much rather be depressed the rest of your life than be looked at as a fucking clown by everyone but not know why. You hated them though, you wanted to slit his throat right here and right now, Daryl felt so bad that he’d actually let you too.
Either of you were too scared to speak, too afraid to bring up the very thing that broke your relationship in the first place. You were afraid simply because it had been going okay so far, nothing like how either you anticipated your first time seeing each other in 2 years would go. Daryl came to help with the water treatment and you were there, all sweaty and worn out. You froze when you first saw him, looking over at michonne who was looking at you looking at him.
She never even told you he had come to visit Alexandria, no warning but simply because she thought he wouldn’t stay long enough for you to see him. He just came for some supplies but ended up sticking around to help out with Alexandria, it was still his home after all. After the water treatment was finally up and going again, you did the unthinkable… you invited Daryl into your once shared home for a glass of water.
“Just to make sure the water treatment is fixed.” You tried to be cheery abit it but something about his eyes made you angry.
Why did you invite him in? You have no idea, maybe because you missed his presence or you wanted to ask the questions that were constantly running through your head or maybe you just wanted to kill him then and there. Daryl was hesitant but he would not pass up the chance to spend time with you, before or after even if he felt terrible for what he did to you.
So here you were, standing in front of him, watching him look at anything but your eyes. Good, he didn’t deserve to look into your eyes after what he did. The house was silent as you drank your waters, neither one of you wanted to bring it up but you decided to rip off the bandaid before it got worse.
“How long did it last?” You asked, the only thing coming out of your mouth in the past 10 minutes.
Daryl could’ve played stupid but he knew what you meant, he knew the answer would leave you more devastated too. Daryl racked his brain to give an exact estimate of how long and each answer created a deep puncture in his chest.
“6 months.” He said plainly, his eyes dropping down to his now empty glass.
Your entire body had gone frozen, your heart crack open more and more as the answer lingered through the air. You knew It was long but 6 months was too long. Your first 6 months with Daryl he had told you he loved you, he fucked you like there was no tomorrow and his told you it would only be you and him for the rest of your lives. What did she get in those 6 months? Did she get the same treatment? What could’ve possibly happened in those 6 months?
“6 months?!?” You damn near yelled, making it known how upset you were.
Daryl just kept his eyes down, he felt so ashamed of himself and he knew you were too. He didn’t speak, just let you have your moment because after all he’s done… you deserve that. Now the question we’re piling up in your head, you didn’t just want answers now you needed them. You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and asked another question.
“What was her name?” You asked, not even knowing if you wanted the answer.
“Leah,” he said without letting the question linger for too long.
“Did you live together?”
“Yes.”
“Did you fuck her?”
“Yes.”
You questioned him rapidly, not even taking a break before going on to the next. You felt you deserved these answers after the long 2 years of them burning in your brain. You asked about her, you asked about him and you asked about what they were. With every answer, even if they were yes and no’s, your heart would break more and more. You needed that though, you needed Daryl to break your heart so you felt sick even looking at him, just so you could move on and heal.
“Why?” Was the only thing you said, no context to what you meant but somehow Daryl knew.
He thought about it, he had no idea why… it just happened. That question had him frozen, struck on the biggest question you’ve asked so far. He racked his brain, trying to find the words for how he really felt and why the hell he did something so stupid. He was stupid was plain and simply put an answer but you deserved an explanation. He finally got the courage to look at you standing there, eyes streaked with tears as you grabbed onto your own hoodie violently. Daryl still thought you were the most beautiful thing but right now he felt he didn’t even deserve to see you.
“I’m stupid y/n, I really am but when Rick disappeared I was sad. I don’t know why but I still had hope he was still out there and I knew I was going out all the time to hurt you, I could feel you getting more distant.” He paused, racking his brain to find more words. “You got so distant that I thought you wanted me out of your life so I did, I stopped coming around because I couldn’t bear to see ya. Then Leah showed up. I knew that when me and you first met, the thing we had with each other, the love we made and the memories, it filled a hole in me… you filled a hole in me Y/N. I was expecting the same thing to happen with Leah, I thought the hole you used to fill could be filled with another person… but it can’t.”
You sobbed even more, tears rushing down your face and you couldn’t even stop them anymore. Daryl’s words were something you needed but when you got it, you couldn’t handle it. His words were too much, they didn’t make you feel any better but only worse. He tried to replace you, he needed to replace you when you needed him the most. You craved him back then, you just wanted your stupid boyfriend to hold you for a while because Rick's death didn’t only hurt Daryl.
Rick was your brother, not by blood but by souls he was. He cared for you, he made sure you were safe and he even saved you in so many ways, even from yourself. So when he died, you couldn’t… you were depressed and Daryl leaving all the time did not help, Daryl was looking for ghosts when you needed him the most.
“I needed you Daryl…I needed you and you weren’t there.” You said simply, shoving your face in your hands as you continued to sob.
Your sobs broke Daryl, he could feel his tears starting to spill over his eyes. He never meant to hurt you, as a matter of fact he promised he would never hurt you and as if you needed more of a reason not to trust anyone again… he broke that promise. He deserved to rot with the walkers for what he did to you and hell he even tried at one point, but he wouldn’t hurt you again… you couldn’t handle another death.
“I’m going to ask one more question Daryl….” You said, taking in a breath before asking. “Did you love her?”
He wanted to laugh at that thought, him loving Leah?? Impossible. He fucked her, he cuddled her, he even let her say he was hers but he knew deep down… He was yours, always and forever. Even if you don’t forgive him now, he will always be yours no matter what. You found him at his worst, you gave him a chance and he fell in love with you. He had never felt that way about someone before, let alone someone like you. A pretty, smart and strong person like you… he never even would’ve thought you would give him the chance you did.
“No… I couldn’t.” He stated, voice cracking as his tears continued to flow down his cheeks.
“You couldn’t?” You asked, confused about what the fuck he meant. Daryl was never good with words and you knew it too.
“I just couldn’t, deep down I knew it was always you I wanted and loved. Y/N what I did wasn’t because I stopped loving you, I did it because I loved you and the feeling you gave me was too good… too pure and when I thought I lost it, I had to get it again but I couldn’t.” He started, explaining himself with words but not even knowing if he was saying anything right.
You stayed silent, the words engraving themselves into your brain. You just sat there, looking down at your shaking hands. You never knew a man could do this to you, leave your sobbing and shaking as he explained why he couldn’t love anyone else but you. You couldn’t forgive Daryl, you couldn’t… you had a soft spot for him but it wasn’t that soft, you wouldn’t just let him break you down again like that.
“I’ll leave you alone…” Daryl set his glass down, picking up his things before turning for the door.
“Daryl!” You yelled before he could even step another foot away from you. Daryl stopped in his tracks, turning once again to face you.
“If you step outside that door… I swear on everything you will never see me again, and I promise you that I will not let you step foot back into Alexandria… you know I have that power to do so.” You threatened, you were angry… he was leaving you again.
“You want me to stay?” He asked, adjusting the crossbow on his shoulder uncomfortably.
“No… no, yes… I mean FUCK! Daryl I want you to stop leaving me, stop running away from us Daryl!” You yelled, not even sure what you meant. “I fucking hate you Daryl… I fucking hate you so very fiber in my body but not because you ruined what we had.. but because after everything you put me through, I’m still so madly and pathetically in love with you.”
You were quite literally pouring your heart out for Daryl and he took it all in, he just hates that he was the one who caused you to do this. You weren’t sure what you wanted but right now you knew you didn’t want Daryl to leave you alone again, you have been alone for too long and you needed him here again but if he left once again you couldn’t bear it.
“So please Daryl… please just stay with me, don’t leave me again.”
Daryl couldn’t bear to see you like this, your eyes wet with tears and lips red from your biting them… what’s worse is that he caused this. He didn’t know what to do in the situation but what he did he for sure thought was the right thing to do. He dropped all this stuff, engulfing you in a hug as you sobbed. You didn’t know if you should hug back or not but you were too broken down, too afraid and too fucking sad to push him away. You wrapped your arms around him, squeezing him close to you like it was your last time seeing him.
His hands made their way up to your hair, lightly scratching your scalp because he knew you liked that. You just buried your tear streaked face into his shirt, causing his shirt to become damp.
“I’m here bunny… I’m not leaving again…” he said, cringey at the pet name but you needed it right now, you needed to know he was there with you.
You were not sure if this was going to spark something once again between you two, you had no idea but having Daryl here with you and speaking to you like he once did, it caused your thoughts to stop for a minute… letting you just feel the way you used to for a minute. If all you got was 2 more minutes of that feeling, you were okay with it.
#daryl dixon smut#daryl dixon fanfiction#the walking dead fanfiction#daryl dixon#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixion imagine
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What Is and What Should Never Be Ch.2
A/N: So, I’m aiming to have the chapter released on thursday or friday nights, as long as nothing gets in the way(i.e. work, life, mental health). but as always, love you and i hope you enjoy🤍 P.S. This is all fictional, straight from my imagination. Please don’t take it too seriously💖
Word Count: 8.3k
Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, Smut(none yet, but for future reference), Bossy/Possessive behavior. Reader Discretion Advised.
You’re just a daydream away. I wouldn’t know what to say if I had you. And I’ll keep you a daydream away, just watch from a safe place, so I never have to lose.
If looks could kill, Jake would’ve been on the floor with a chalk outline surrounding him. “What the fuck is your problem? Do you understand how embarrassing that was?” He sat on the edge of the desk, completely unbothered as he stared at you, “I’m a grown woman, Jake. If you have an issue, address me like an adult, don’t talk to me like I’m a fucking toddler.” You stood from your chair, releasing a frustrated breath, “Is this funny to you?”
He had a slight tilt to his lip, eyeing you with amusement, “Actually-.” The look you gave him made him bite his lips in, trying to straighten his face out, “No. No, you’re right… It’s not funny.” He was fighting to be serious but he lost when his grin came about in full force, showcasing his perfect teeth, “You’re kinda like a rabid chihuahua when you’re pissed.” He was cackling at you, and if it weren’t for how angry you were, you might have even found his laugh cute.
“This isn’t fucking worth it.” You turned around, ripping the office door open, and grabbed your bag from below the register, “I quit.” You didn’t bother to look back at him as you stepped around the counter and headed for the front door.
Jake was planted in the office doorway, “Learn to take a joke, peach.” He called out, still a hint of laughter in his voice, “C’mon, you’re not really gonna leave.” The amusement faded when he realized you weren’t stopping. Just as your hand landed on the door, he was coming after you, “Hey, Y/N, wait.”
You ignored him, pushing through the door, only to run face first into someone coming inside. Your bag slipped from your hand, hitting the ground, “Great… This day just keeps getting better.” Grumbling to yourself, you knelt down to pick the tote bag up, rubbing your hand over your nose. You were prepared for a verbal lashing from whoever you’d collided with, but to your surprise, you were greeted by Josh’s cheery voice.
“What the- Y/N? Where are you off to, speed racer?” He was chuckling until you looked up at him, “Shit, are you okay?” Right as the question left his mouth, you could feel the first drop roll over your top lip. You clamped a hand over the lower half of your face and tried to wiggle around Josh, but he grabbed your shoulders.
You mumbled into your palm, feeling the blood pool in your hand, “Josh, let me out before it drips on the floor.” Your second attempt to squeeze by him was stopped by not only him, but his twin as well.
Jake’s hand was on your waist, turning you away from Josh to face him, “Move your hand.” He was holding a fistful of napkins, trying to survey the damage, “Y/N, move your damn hand and let me see.” His assertive tone was overshadowed by Josh’s soft one.
“Hey, let me have a look.” His hand circled your wrist gently and you allowed him to pull it away from your face. Your eyes widened at the amount of blood covering your palm and Josh was quick to ease your panic, “It’s not even that bad, Y/N, promise.” He took a few of the napkins from his brother and held them against your nose, “Does it hurt at all?” You shook your head at him, “Okay, then it shouldn’t be broken…” His free hand went to the back of your neck, angling your head down, “Try not to swallow any blood, I’m gonna grab a towel or something.” He took your bag and pressed your hand to the napkin, prompting you to hold it as he scurried deeper into the store.
Jake was grabbing your opposite hand, wiping away the crimson stains, “You need to sit down, come on.” You wanted to rip away from him, but the way his palm flattened against your back had you trailing beside him as he led you back to the office. He sat you in the chair just as Josh came barrelling through the door, “Can I take this?” He placed a small trash bin between your feet and pointed to the bloody napkin in your hand. You nodded and he knelt in front of you, carefully moving your hand to peel the tissue away and drop it into the trash, “Josh, did you get a towel?” His eyes stayed trained on you as he asked the question.
“Yeah, here. I ran it under some water.” Josh handed the rag off to his brother, “Is it still bleeding?”
You allowed Jake to dab at your nose, “No, I think she’s done.” He continued to wipe at your face, his gaze on your mouth as he slowly dragged the wet cloth across your lip. He looked up, realizing his distraction, and caught your eyes on him, “Uhh, here…” He shoved the towel into your hand and stood up, “You should go to the bathroom and clean up.” He backed away, giving you the space to get up.
Shielding your face to hide whatever mess was there, you turned to Josh, “Where…is the bathroom at?”
“Oh. It’s- I’ll show you.” His eyes flicked to Jake’s before he ushered you out of the office and walked you towards the back of the store, “Jake didn’t show you where the bathroom was?” He led you into a small hallway, one door on each side and one at the end. You shook your head as he stopped in front of the door on the left, pushing it open, “It’s here, I’ll give you a minute.” You went through, closing it behind you. A defeated sigh left your mouth at the sight of yourself in the dirty mirror. You turned the faucet on, letting the water get hot, and rinsed the rag to scrub the drying blood from your face. Of all the things that could happen on your first day, it had to be this. Everything was a shit show and you couldn’t wait to just go home, bury yourself in a mountain of blankets and never step foot in this place again. You could get a job literally anywhere else and surely there were other record stores in the area…Or you could always just order your vinyls online. You ripped a paper towel from the roll and dried your face and hands before stepping out of the bathroom. Josh was still standing in the hallway, waiting for you to come out, “I’m really sorry, Y/N. You just collided right into my shoulder, I didn’t see you com-.”
“Josh, it’s fine. I’m fine, really. It was my fault.” You stalked out of the hallway, ready to grab your things and go.
You could hear his footsteps following behind you, “Why were you in such a rush? Were you leaving?”
Your bag was on the counter where Josh had dropped it to search for a towel and you grabbed it. There were a couple people in the store now and you locked eyes with Jake as he was talking with a customer a few feet away from you, “I just… This isn’t going to work out. Me working here, I mean.” You were talking quietly to avoid making a scene.
His eyes followed yours to his twin before coming back to you, “What did he do?” You shook your head and kept walking, finally making it out the door and onto the sidewalk. You took a deep breath, filling your lungs with the city air, and released it as you dug through the bag for your phone. Bellamy had dropped you off in the morning and took your car to work, so your only option was to walk home or call a lyft. You hadn’t noticed that Josh followed you outside until his hand was on your arm, turning you to face him, “If he did something, you have to tell me. I’ll deal with him. Just…don’t leave, don’t quit.”
“Josh, I don’t think your brother likes me very much.” You jammed the phone into your back pocket, “And I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let anybody treat me like a child… It was nice to meet you.” You didn’t leave room for a response as you turned away, opting to walk home.
“Treat you like-? Y/N, can you just-.” You felt his hand curl around your wrist again, effectively stopping you with the soft grip, “Let’s go get lunch and talk about this. I’m sure we can resolve whatever issues there are.” His pleading eyes and the way his fingertips sent a wave of warmth up your arm and through your chest made it hard to tell him no.
You ran a hand through your hair and looked past Josh, catching Jake watching the two of you through the storefront window. You looked away quickly, “There’s nothing to talk about. I just want to go home and pretend this day never happened.” You couldn’t help the whine that escaped your mouth, causing his lip to twitch into a small smirk.
He finally dropped your wrist, shoving his hands into his pockets, “You like fries? The Melt has great fries, c’mon.” He walked by you, not even bothering to check if you were coming. You gave in, following him to his car. He was already pulling the passenger door open for you as he fished his keys from his pocket.
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“Their burgers are good too.” Josh was seated across from you, looking over the menu in his hands. You couldn’t see his face behind it, just the wild curls poking out from above it.
You sipped on the iced tea in front of you, looking down at your own menu, “You had me sold on fries, honestly. I think I’m just gonna get an order of the garlic parmesan.” The waitress was coming back to your table to take your orders with a polite smile.
Josh closed his menu, and picked yours up to hand them over to her, “Are you sure that’s all you want?” You nodded at him as he looked up at the young girl, “She’s just gonna have the garlic parm fries and I am gonna do the sweet potato fries and a patty melt.” She was writing the order down in her notepad, “Actually, make that two patty melts, but can you box one up to go?” The girl replied with a quiet ‘sure thing’ before departing. His eyes fell on you and you tried to look anywhere else, “Will you tell me what happened?” You finally looked at him, catching his big brown eyes that he strategically paired with his dazzling smile.
“I don’t even know what happened, Josh.” You were stirring the straw around in your cup, listening to the ice clink against the glass, “He was in the office and a customer came in, so I did what I thought I was supposed to do and helped the guy… Some girl, Olivia, was watching the whole time. I don’t know when she disappeared, but she was there.”
He was resting his head on his fist, listening to you, “Yeah, Jake texted me and told me she wanted back on the schedule… She’s sweet, but kind of a nightmare.” He waved his hand dismissively and told you to continue.
You couldn’t help the sarcasm lacing your voice, “She’s a real sweetheart.” You tucked your hands into your lap, to stop them from touching random things on the table, “So, I have this dude ready to buy two albums and the next thing I know, Jake is yelling at me to go into the office. He accused me of flirting with the customer and then sent me off for a fucking timeout… It was humiliating.” You shook your head as you thought back on it, “And then he just laughed about it, like it was some kind of game to him. I don’t know what I did to make him hate me.”
“He doesn’t hate you, Y/N. Jake’s just…He’s got a kind of…sardonic sense of humor, I guess?” He shrugged, trying to find the right way to describe his twin, “I’m sure he didn’t mean to upset you.”
Jake’s mocking tone floated through your brain. Learn to take a joke, peach. But the way he was staring daggers at you and your customer didn’t seem like a joke. “If that’s how every shift with him is gonna be, I can’t do it. I’m sorry, I just-.” You were interrupted by the waitress bringing your food out. She placed the dishes on the table and told Josh his to-go order would be ready in 15 minutes before she left again.
He was already shoving a few fries into his mouth, “It’s not. It won’t be, just trust me.” He mumbled around the hot food, blowing steam through his lips.
You watched as he went in for a couple more before swallowing what was already in his mouth, “I don’t know, Josh…”
He dropped the fries, wiping his fingers with a napkin before folding his hands in front of his face, “Take a day to think about it. If you really want to quit, I won’t hold it against you…but if you think you can stomach another try, come in wednesday and you’ll have me and only me. Jake won’t be around, it’s his day off.” His bright grin made it impossible to say no, so you compromised.
“Okay. I’ll think about it.” You tossed a fry into your mouth.
“Brilliant!” Satisfied with your answer, he picked his sandwich up and chomped into it with a delighted hum, his smile never fading.
You sat and ate, carrying on small conversation for a bit. Josh was incredibly open about sharing his life and you’d learned a lot about him. His parents opened the record store when he and Jake were young and passed it onto the twins when they were 22 and moved back to their home state. Now, almost four years later, they’re turning 26 and still running their family business successfully. “Our birthday is actually coming up in a few weeks.” The waitress came out with the to-go order and the check, placing them in front of Josh.
“How much was mine?” You pulled your wallet out as he placed his card on the tray and handed it back to the girl.
He swatted his hand at you, “Don’t worry about it. It’s the least I could do after giving you a bloody nose.” He pulled his lip between his teeth, “And a pretty girl should never have to pay for her meal…or is it drinks?” He scratched his chin, brows drawn together in thought, and the sight made you giggle.
“The bloody nose was one hundred percent my fault, but thank you, Josh.” The young girl came back, giving Josh his card and receipt as she muttered a ‘have a good day.’ and moved on to her next table.
He picked up the pen, writing a tip and scribbling down his signature, “You ready to go?” He stood up and you followed him through the restaurant and out the door, “I’ll drop you at your car, I gotta run Jake his lunch anyways.” He pulled the passenger door open, waiting until you slid into the seat to close it.
The short drive back was quiet, only the dull melody from the radio filling the air. When Josh parked his car along the curb you hopped out, “Thanks, again, for lunch, hun.” You offered a wave before starting down the sidewalk.
He stepped out as well, “Where’s your car?”
“Bellamy has it, I’m gonna walk.” Before he could open his mouth to protest, you added, “It’ll give some extra time to think over my decision.” You continued walking, only glancing back after a minute or so to see him leaning on the hood of his car, watching you go. He flashed a smile so bright, you could see it from a mile away, and waved before heading into the store.
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Your best friend was yelling over the blender as it pulverized the frozen fruit, “Don’t go back. That guy sounds like an asshole, Y/N.” She hit a button, effectively ceasing the noise.
“He is an asshole… Or was anyways.” You sat on the countertop beside the blender, watching her attempt to make strawberry daiquiris, “Josh practically begged me to stay though and he’s so freaking cool, Bell, like so different from his brother.” You plucked the fraying threads on your jeans, “It was kind of weird, though… When my nose started bleeding, Jake was a completely different person, like…sweet, almost?” Your mind wandered to the way he was looking at you as he carefully wiped at your lips.
“So which one is it? Which one do you wanna sleep with, babe? Josh or Jake?” Bellamy pursed her lips, waiting for an answer, “I’m serious, Y/N. I can see it all over your face.”
You hopped down from the counter, “I don’t want to sleep- I just met them, Bellamy.” She wasn’t buying it and frankly, you weren’t sure you were buying it yourself, “I just think that I could be really good at this job and that I might actually enjoy it. I don’t want to go back to making shit tips, waiting tables.” You pulled the bottle of rum from the cabinet and handed it to her, “But I need to get along with both of them if I want to stay there and the only way to do that is to try, B.”
She poured the liquor into the blender, measuring with her heart, “I hear you, sweet pea, I do.” Replacing the lid, she put the bottle on the counter and turned to face you, “I just don’t want to see you get caught up in a messy situation…especially with brothers.”
“There’s no way for things to get messy because there’s nothing to get caught up in. Promise.” You reached over and clicked the button on the machine to avoid any response she might’ve had.
Once you settled into bed for the night, you really began to weigh the pros and cons of keeping the job. Pros: Music was something you loved, deeply, and to be able to work in a place where you could talk about it all day was a dream in itself. There was also Josh. He was fun and kind and you found yourself happy to be near him, like he was someone you could truly vibe with. And Jake… He seemed cool enough, even laughed at your jokes and he has great taste in music. But the cons? You don’t know which version of Jake you would get. The arrogant dickhead or the almost sweet guy that was quick to take care of your nosebleed today? As you pondered your list, your phone pinged with a text.
Unknown 10:43pm: sorry about today. don’t quit.
Josh? He must’ve gotten your number off of the application. You were about to text back and let him know that you intended on staying when another text came through.
Unknown 10:47: come in tomorrow at noon, peach.
Peach? Jake…
You locked your phone and plugged it in, leaving it face down on the nightstand. Why did he text you? Why couldn’t he just have apologized this morning? You left the texts on read, clicking your lamp off, and pulled the comforter up to your shoulders. Now you were faced with a new decision to make; Face Jake tomorrow or avoid him and go in with Josh on wednesday. Too tired to forge another list of pros and cons, you closed your eyes and allowed yourself to fall asleep.
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Tuesday 11:15am
You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror, securing your second dutch braid with a tiny rubberband. You tried to convince yourself all morning that it was better to just go in on wednesday, that working with Josh would be fun and you wouldn’t have to worry about every little thing you might be doing wrong. Yet here you were, checking your appearance one last time before inevitably starting the 20 minute walk to Highway Tunes, complying with Jake’s request again.
Pushing through the front door with a heavy sigh, you looked around for him, but he wasn’t in sight. “Hey there! Welcome to Highway Tunes!” The voice startled you, causing you to jump and look at the man it came from, “Is there anything I can help you with today?” Your eyes wandered up to his face. He was tall, thick dark hair, cascading in waves around his face and past his shoulders. His smile was sort of goofy, but in a beautiful way, outlined by full, pouty lips.
You opened your mouth to answer, but Jake’s voice came first, “Sam, leave the customers alone, you don’t work here.” Your view of him was obstructed by the tall boy standing in front of you, “You need to go back to class, I don’t have time for this today.”
Just then, the boy, Sam, stepped aside to face him, “My next class doesn’t start until 1.” Jake’s eyes fell on you as the other boy continued, “And you were busy, so excuse me for trying to help.” He turned back to you with an apologetic shrug, “Sorry, about that… He’s always a grump. Where were we?”
“I’m actually here to see the grump.” You pointed to where he was standing, still watching you, and scrunched your nose at the boy, “He’s my boss.”
“Ahh. You’re the new hire?” He glanced at Jake and back to you, looking you up and down, “No wonder he’s on edge today… I haven’t seen him this bad in a while.” He pulled his lip between his teeth to stifle a laugh, and before you could ask what he meant, Jake was at his side, pushing him towards the door.
“Time to go, Sammy.” You watched Sam struggle against him, trying to shout in protest, “Come back on Josh’s shift, later.” He shoved the boy out the door and pulled it shut, waiting for him to walk away before turning to you, “He’s a fucking nuisance. I’m sorry.”
He walked by you, going towards the back of the store, “I don’t know… I thought he was kinda cute.” You kept a playful tone, making it obvious that you were joking, but you saw Jake visibly tense up, “Kidding…ha ha. You’re supposed to laugh.” When he didn’t say anything, you were sure you’d made a mistake coming in, “Or you can yell at me and accuse me of flirting again…Goodbye.” You turned away, heading for the door just like the day prior.
“Wait…” You didn’t bother to stop or even look back at him, until he yelled, “Goddammit, would you stop doing that!” When you finally turned back to him, he was only a few feet from you, clenching his jaw, “Do you get enjoyment out of ignoring me?”
“Ignoring you?” A humorless laugh fell from your lips, “Why am I here, Jake? Did you tell me to come down here just so you could fucking berate me again?” You were glaring at him, waiting for a response, but he remained silent, staring directly back at you, “Well, if you have nothing to say then-.”
He stepped forward, his hand curling around your wrist before you could walk away again, “Y/N, just- I’m sorry, okay?” You took note of how gentle his grip was as the door chimed. He looked over your shoulder to whoever had come in before dropping your wrist, “Go wait- Can you wait in the office? Please?” He went to greet the customer and you went in the opposite direction. You stood behind the counter, watching Jake lead the older woman around the store with a polite smile. There was something admirable about the way he carried himself, the confidence he displayed. He moved like he knew you were watching him; always angling himself so you could see his face, without ever looking at you. He would run his fingertips over his lips or his chin with a subtle smirk, drawing attention to his hands and mouth. You found yourself staring, keeping up with his every move, until he was coming towards you. Standing up straight, you attempted to look distracted, but his face said he knew you were eyeing him, “Alright, Ms Grace, I’m gonna have Y/N check you out while I go put that order in for you, okay?” Jake came around the counter to stand behind you, placing his hands on your shoulders, “Can you do that for me, peach?”
Turning your head slightly, you caught his eyes and gave a nod, “Y-yeah… No problem.” Your voice was barely a whisper as you tried to focus on anything other than the electric current his touch sent through your body. You directed your attention to the woman, probably in her 60s, “Hi, did you find everything you were looking for today?” Jake dropped his hands with a smile and went into the office.
“For the most part, yes.” She placed her findings on the counter and slid them over to you, “Everything except Frank Sinatra.” She shook her head as you picked up the vinyls and began ringing them up; Unforgettable by Nat “King'' Cole and I Put a Spell On You by Nina Simone, “I can’t believe they sold out of Sinatra…” She slapped her palm on the countertop.
“Oh… Ms Grace, is it?” You waited for her to confirm, “Well, Ms Grace, you still got some really great picks today. I adore Nina Simone, but I also know how great Ol’ Blue Eyes sounds on vinyl.” She nodded her head, impressed with your sentiment, “Jake will get your order put in and I’m sure it’ll be here by Friday with our regular shipment.” Putting on the sweetest smile you could, you gave her the total, “For these two, it’s gonna be $64.97 today, hun.”
She placed her bulky purse on the counter, digging through it, “You tell Jacob and Joshua to call me the minute my order comes in, okay, honey?” The woman retrieved her wallet, pulling a few bills from it, and handed them over.
You accepted them, placing them in the drawer and handing back her change, “Of course, Ms Grace. I will pass the message along.” You tucked her two records into a bag and gave it to her, “You have a great day!”
“Oh you too, honey!” She took the bag from your hand and slung her purse over her shoulder, “Good thing they replaced that snotty blonde girl… I like you a lot better.” She waved her hand with a scoff as she turned to leave.
You watched her go, chuckling to yourself when you felt Jake standing behind you, “Grace likes you, now you have to stay.” He was so close, you could smell the smoky scent of his cologne, “She’s been telling us to get rid of Liv since she started.”
“She might be onto something…” You shuffled away from him, moving to the opposite side of the counter to look at him face to face, “Give me a reason to stay. I need more than just the approval of one of your regulars.” You watched his lip curl into the familiar smirk.
He was too relaxed, leaning on his elbows, “What does everyone have against Liv? She’s my gold star, always bringing in the sales.” He laughed as you rolled your eyes at him, “Okay, alright, peach… You’re good here. Not even two hours into your first shift and you managed to sell not just one, but two albums.” You crossed your arms over your chest, silently telling him you needed more, “That kid yesterday was fucking smitten with you, kept saying how much of a help you were.” You could see the distaste in his expression over the boy’s interest in you, “and I heard you talking to Grace. You know music. More than anybody else we’ve ever hired. I can tell it’s something you’re passionate about and we need more of that here.” Your face broke into a grin at his admission and now he was rolling his eyes, “Are you gonna stay or not?”
“I might consider it if you set me up with that cute guy that was here when I came in.” You waited to see how he would react. Maybe he would shrug your comment off or maybe he would tense up again, maybe get angry, “He had a pretty smile.”
He pushed his tongue into his cheek, forcing his shoulders to relax, “You gonna let both of my brother’s take you out to lunch, peach?” He shoved his hands into his pockets and walked away, heading towards the back of the store, “When do I get my turn, huh?” He vanished into the back hallway, going through the door parallel to the bathroom.
You were dumbfounded, partially from his inquiry, but also from finding out the tall boy was he and Josh’s brother. You toed down the hallway, leaning on the door frame, “How many brother’s do you have?” He didn’t answer, just continued moving through the room. There were boxes scattered around the floor and tucked into shelves. It must’ve been storage, where they kept their inventory and overstock, “Okay…well you should know that jealousy isn’t a good look on you.” You cocked an eyebrow as he finally looked at you, “And if you want a ‘turn’ all you have to do is ask.” His mouth hung open as you turned to leave, smiling to yourself. You called from the end of the hallway, “Send me my schedule. I know you have my number.” As you made it back to the front of the store, you heard him call out a ‘Bye, peach.’ before you pushed through the door to head back home.
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The next few weeks ran smoothly. You worked with Josh a lot and those shifts were always fun. He made the environment comfortable, but shifts with Jake were also fun in their own way. Josh was the type to turn a slow, boring day into a childish game of hide and seek. You would be standing at the counter, mindlessly scrolling on your phone, only to get a ‘come find me’ text from him. You’d spend the next 10 minutes running around the store, checking all the nooks and crannies you could find, searching for him. And every time, you would give up and text him back with some excuse that would force him out of his hiding spot, calling you a sore loser. He was all flirty comments and goofy jokes all the time, sure to draw giggles from you whenever he opened his mouth and you absolutely adored it.
Working with Jake was completely different. There were no games, at least not the kind Josh would come up with. It was a back and forth match of snide comments, or sarcastic remarks that would have you two glaring at each other one second, just to turn your backs and smile the next. Sometimes he’d display an odd, almost possessive nature; He never pulled you away from a customer like the first day you’d worked, but with some customers, specifically the younger men, you would always catch him lingering close by or keeping his eyes on you from wherever he was. When you finally asked him why he did it, he’d just played it off like he had no idea what you meant.
You got to meet the other employees as well. There was Charlie, an older man in his late 40s. He’d worked for the boy's parents for over a decade and stayed on after they’d handed the store down. He only works a few days a week, but he’s the one Jake and Josh rely on to run things when neither of them can open or close up. Then there was Nate, a young, high school kid who picked up a shift or two during the week, after school. And, of course, Olivia. Or Liv, as Jake called her. His gold star. God, Josh was right when he said she was a nightmare. You didn’t work with her very much, but the shifts you did share with her could never go by quick enough. It was always you, her and Jake, and she wasn’t exactly subtle in the way she threw herself at him. Sometimes he would indulge her, grasping her hips to move around her or brushing up against her to grab a record that she ‘just couldn’t reach.’ Everytime, it made you irrationally angry and you didn’t know why. But after this Friday shift, you were happy to have the weekend off..now you wouldn’t have to see her until Monday night. You grabbed your bag from its place, below the register, and clocked out, “Josh, I’m heading out! See you next week, hun.” You called out to him, unsure of where he may have been.
“Shit…Y/N, wait!” He came flying out of the back, tripping over his own feet. You let out a soft laugh as he bounded up to you, “Hey.”
“Hey…”
He stood up straight, pulling at a few of his curls, “Do you- Uhh…what are you doing tonight?” He left no room for a response as he kept talking, “My birthday- or, our birthday, me and Jakey… It’s tomorrow, that’s why we’re closed.” He was rambling and you tried to stifle your smile at his flustered appearance, “We were gonna go out to celebrate tonight. Did you wanna-? Are you doing anything?” He had a hopeful look in his eyes and you felt guilty for having to turn him down.
“Josh, I’m sorry… This and the first weekend me and Bellamy have had off together since we moved here.” You placed a hand on his shoulder with an apologetic frown, “We made plans to go out and explore the bar life in the area.” You felt his shoulders drop in defeat and pulled your hand back, “I’ll make it up to you… I’ll bake you both a cake or something. I am really sorry.”
“Naah, it’s okay. I should’ve mentioned something earlier.” His smile returned, bright as ever, “Have fun tonight, and I’m gonna hold you to that cake.” He was already heading back to the storage room, “I like vanilla, Jake likes chocolate. Figure it out!” You watched him dramatically wave his hand before disappearing through the doorway.
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“Do my tits look good?” Bellamy was standing on the curb, using a random car window to check her reflection.
You pulled your dress down to ensure your ass wasn’t hanging out as you moved to look at her, “They look as perfect as they did the last time you asked, B.” You turned your back to her, looking up at the neon sign that illuminated the bar entrance, Blondie’s Bar, “I swear to god, if this one is filled with frat boys too, I’m calling it a night and going home.” It was ticking closer to midnight and your first San Francisco bar crawl was turning out to be a let down. Of the four bars you’d already been to, the first was filled with snobs, drinking wine and while classical music played quietly in the background. You didn’t even stay for a single drink, Bellamy was pulling you back out of the door before it had a chance to shut behind you. The other three were places the two of you would normally find a good time at, but after a shot or two, the testosterone ridden college jocks would become insufferable at their attempts to flirt. You couldn’t make your disinterest more obvious to them. After paying the cover and walking into the fifth bar, you weren’t feeling very hopeful.
Bellamy looped her arm with yours as you went through the door, “It doesn’t seem terrible.” The space wasn’t very large, but it was especially packed for a Friday night and there was live music, “Oooh, and I think I see potential.” You tried to follow her gaze, but there were too many people to tell who she was looking at.
“Alright, let’s get a drink before you run off to charm some poor boy.” You dragged her to the bar as you both laughed. The bartender greeted you with a nod, “Hi, we’ll take two shots of Jameson and- What do you want, Bell?”
She leaned in close, talking loudly to the bartender, “I want a long island!”
Her nose was tinted red, telling you she was decently buzzed, “Okay. Two shots of Jameson, a long island and I’ll have a whisky ginger, please!” He poured the shots, sliding them over to you, and went about making your drinks.
Bellamy threw her shot back and picked her glass up from the bar top, “I’m gonna try to find that guy I saw when we came in.” She was looking around the space, “Are you gonna be okay?”
“I’ll be fine, B. I don’t need a babysitter.” You took your own shot and placed the tiny glass beside hers, “Go do your thing, babe!” She gave you a hard peck on the cheek before slinking off into the crowd. Part of you wanted to do the same thing; run off to find some cute guy that you could take home… But at the same time, you had no interest in hooking up with a random guy. Back home you had a regular no-strings-attached hookup that you could call to scratch that itch, but here, you didn’t know anybody. And you didn’t give yourself the time to meet new people when all you did was go to work and go home. You ordered another shot as you sat by yourself, occasionally looking around for your friend. After finishing your whisky ginger, you got one more shot or Jameson and stood to go and find her. It had been about a half hour since she’d gone on her search. Weaving through the crowd of people, you started to feel the effects of the liquor, but you pushed through and headed into the bathroom to pee.
When you reemerged, Bellamy was in your face, gushing about the guy she’d seen, “Babe, I found him! He’s so fucking hot. Fuck, I don’t remember his name…” She bit her lip in thought for a moment before shaking her head, “Doesn’t matter. I’ll ask him again later. But he wants to take me back to his apartment.” She let out a squeal loud enough that you could hear it over the band playing on the small stage, “Do you think you can get home by yourself?”
“Wait, you’re leaving? Bellamy, what if this guy is like a murderer?” You were staring at her, trying to focus through the blurring in your vision.
“He studies photography in college, I doubt he’s a murderer, Y/N.” She was practically pleading for your approval with her large, puppy eyes.
You gave it thought before relenting, “I want your location before you even leave this bar.” She pulled her phone out, clicking a few times, and sent your live link for her location. “Thank you. Be safe, Bell. I love you.”
She wrapped her arms around you in a suffocating hug, “I love you more, sweet pea. Let me know when you get home, okay?” You watched her vanish into the sea of bodies again and headed back to the bar to close your tab out.
You climbed onto a stool, waiting for the bartender to finish the flirty conversation he was having with the red headed girl at the opposite end of the bar, when a deep voice startled you, “Funny seeing you here, peach.” You looked up to see Jake sliding onto the stool next to you, “Josh told me you weren’t coming out tonight.”
“Me and Bellamy were looking for a good place to get drinks…ended up here.” You were playing with the straw in your empty glass, poking at the melting ice, “I didn’t know this is where you guys would be.”
“Ah. The infamous Bellamy. Do I finally get to meet her?” He looked around you, trying to figure out which one of the women could be your best friend.
The bartender came over to you now, asking if you wanted a refill. You politely declined and asked him to close you out., “She left already, unfortunately. Some other time, I guess.” You hopped down from the stool and pulled your dress down over your thighs just as the man laid your card on the bartop, “I think I’m heading out too…I’ll see you Monday, boss.” You flashed him a smile as you turned away and you tripped on air, sending yourself towards the floor.
Jake reached out, hooking an arm around your waist to catch you, “You’re not driving are you?” You could hear the concern in his voice as you shook your head, “Well how are you getting home, Y/N?” He made sure you were steady on your feet before letting his arm drop.
You put your palm over your forehead, squinting through the lights, as you started to realize how much you’d had to drink, “Uhhh…Walking. I’m gonna walk. It’s only a few blocks, I think.” You opened the small bag you were carrying to retrieve your phone, “Shit. Bellamy has the house keys.” You groaned out loud, fanning your face as the room started to tilt and shift, “Is it hot in here? I’m sweating. Are you hot?”
“Let’s get some fresh air, yeah?” He was leading you through the bar quickly, “How much did you drink, Y/N?” His tone was almost scolding, mirroring how your dad might have talked to you after doing something you shouldn’t have, “Y/N, how much?”
The cool air hit your face as you waved dismissively at him, “I like it better when you call me peach.” You could hear yourself slurring the words, “Can you just call me peach, Jake? I like how it sounds coming from these lips.” You poked at his mouth with your index finger. He caught your wrist to stop your prodding but he didn’t pull your hand away from his lips, just kept his eyes locked on your own. That same electric current you felt when he had his hands on your shoulders or every time his fingers would graze your skin in passing, it was there, sparking through your veins and lighting your nerve endings on fire. You leaned into him, so close that you could feel his breath against your face. “I have to go home…” Your voice was a meek whisper as you pulled your arm from his grasp and stepped away.
You barely stumbled to the curb before he was at your side again, “You can’t walk home, peach. Let me get you a lyft or something.” He dug his phone from his pocket, opening up the ride app, while keeping a hand on your waist. “Okay. Ride’s gonna be here in two minutes, you’ll have to tell ‘em your address.” You nodded as you began to sway and your head dropped to his shoulder, “Hey… Hey, are you fucking sleeping? Peach?… Goddammit.”
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The sound of a door closing echoed in your head, forcing your eyes to open. Your hands came up immediately, digging the heels of your palms into the sockets in an attempt to combat the blinding sunlight. Once they were accustomed to the brightness, your eyes wandered, taking in your surroundings. It was a room you didn’t recognize. Did you go home with someone? A feeling of dread started to consume you as you realized the clothes on your body weren’t yours. You sat up in the bed, searching for any indication of who’s bedroom you were in, when a soft knock on the door stole your attention. You stayed silent, unsure if you wanted to know who was on the other side.
“Y/N, are you up?” The voice had you tossing the duvet from your body and clambering out of the bed. You misjudged how far down the floor was, causing you to tumble as you rushed to swing the door open, “Finally… Here.” Jake placed a bottle of water in one hand and a paper coffee cup in the other before turning away, “Water first, then coffee, peach.” You watched him disappear through a doorway as you stared after him in disbelief.
When he didn’t come back after a minute, you placed the drinks on the closest table and followed him. Turning into the room he’d gone into, you found that it was a kitchen and Jake was sitting at the breakfast nook in the corner, flipping through a stack of papers. You studied him for a few silent moments, trying to work up the nerve to ask him a difficult question, “Umm. Jake…” His eyes flicked to you briefly before setting back on the paper. When you didn’t say anything he dropped his pen and fully faced you. Your gaze dropped to your hands as they tugged at the hem of the t-shirt you were wearing.
“I slept on the couch, peach. Nothing happened.” He picked his coffee up, taking a long chug, “Did you drink that water?”
You took a few steps towards him, “How did I end up here?”
He motioned for you to take the seat across from him. Once you sat down, he stood up and left the room, returning a few seconds later with the water bottle and the coffee cup, “Drink.” He pushed the water in front of you, “At least half.” You sat in a glaring match with him until you finally broke and twisted the cap off, chugging it down, “Good job, peach.” He picked the pen up and went back to his paperwork, “Do you remember anything?”
“The last thing I remember is Bellamy leaving the bar and I went to close my tab…Then you were there…” Your eyes shifted back and forth as you combed your brain for any memory, “I think…Fuck, I don’t know. I never get that drunk.” You buried your face in your palms with a whine. “Why am I here? Did you change my clothes?” It sounded like an accusation but you didn’t mean it that way.
Jake let out a quiet chuckle, “You changed your own clothes, Y/N.” He put the pen down again and pushed his papers aside, “You were trying to walk home by yourself last night, could barely stand up straight. I ordered you a lyft to get you home and you passed out while we waited for it.” He leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest as he looked at you, “I don’t know where you live and I wasn’t just gonna leave you on the sidewalk to get yourself home, so I brought you here… You were in and out the whole ride. Once I got you inside, you said you had to pee, so I walked you to the bathroom and left you to do your business, but you were complaining about your dress riding up and you started taking it off.” You could feel your face growing red with embarrassment and he was trying hard to hide his amusement, “I grabbed some shit that I thought you would be more comfortable in and left it on the sink for you. You must have changed at some point, because when you finally came out of the bathroom, you were in the clothes I left and your dress was thrown in my shower…I just put you in the bedroom and let you sleep it off.”
You laid your forehead on the tabletop, “I’m so sorry…” How could you let this happen? Lifting your head to look at him, you caught his eyes, “Thank you, Jake, really. But, I’m so fucking sorry.” Your eyes widened as a realization hit you, “Oh-Oh my god… It’s your birthday… It’s your birthday and I- you just-.”
“Let’s go get breakfast, I’m starving.” He tipped back the last of his coffee and stood up. When you didn’t move, he tapped the table to gain your attention, “Peach. Breakfast. Let’s go.” He nodded towards the doorway.
“Jake, I don’t have clothes. I should just go home.” You finally pushed yourself to your feet, “Where’s my stuff?”
He pulled his phone up to check the time, “It’s in the bedroom and you can wear what you have on. I’ve been waiting all morning for you to wake up so we could eat.” You stared at him, confusion evident on your face, “Jesus, Y/N, go get your things.”
At a loss for words, you scurried around him and back to the room you’d awoke in to gather your stuff. When you came out, he was standing at the front door, holding the booties you wore out the night before. You took them from his hand and slipped them on hastily, “Are you taking me home?”
“After breakfast, peach.” He pulled the door open, ushering you out, and locked it behind him. You tried to protest but he held his finger up to silence you, “It’s my birthday, you can’t be a fucking brat today.” He moved by you, purposely bumping your shoulder as he passed. You rolled your eyes, mumbling to yourself to mock him. He whipped around to face you, “What did you say?”
You plastered on the brightest smile you could muster, batting your eyelashes at him, if only to get under his skin, “Oh… Just happy birthday, Jakey.” He was stuck in place, staring at you with a slight gape to his mouth. You just shrugged and pushed past him, bumping his shoulder right back, as you walked down the apartment building corridor, “Breakfast. Let’s Go.” You looked back at him with a smirk, repeating his own words.
“That fucking mouth…”
.
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If you're up to it, can you write insecure or guilty Miguel? Do I want guilty Miguel after his hesitation in your omegaverse story? Yes, yes I do. And are you keeping us, readers, fed? Yes, yes you are.
hello yes, i'm so happy to keep y'all fed >=3 this is rly helping me get out of my writing slump
anyways, i wasn't entirely sure which of the omegaverse ficlets you were talking about since there's two of them. i ended up picking the first one i wrote, about Miles wanting to be collared.
for anyone who wasn't read those ficlets, you can find them here and here. that second link is the collar one.
The guilt hits when Miguel is out shopping. Maybe it's how mundane the task is, standing there in a supermarket in Nueva York with it's harsh fluorescent lights and faint cheery but stale music. Maybe it's the plastic of the collar he's holding, plain white and smoothed into an unpleasant slickness, like it's got a thin layer of oil on it.
What the hell is he doing? Buying a collar for a fifteen year old Omega as some kind of show of ownership. It's not uncommon for Alphas to collar their mates; they're naturally possessive that way. But those collars are engraved or have tags to prove ownership. Only unbonded Omegas wear the kind of plain collar Miguel is looking at. Which just goes to prove that Miguel knows exactly how wrong what he's doing is.
Miles is too young, and Miguel too old. What's he trying to play at, pretending this relationship could ever work out? No matter how amazing Miles smells (bright and warm, like sunshine and spices), or how attractive his growing body is, the coltish legs, the broad shoulders he hasn't quite filled out yet, the stubble he'll need to start shaving soon. None of it is an excuse for what Miguel is doing.
And still he stands there, staring at the stupid collars.
Does Miles even want this? a voice in his head asks. An angry Alpha was bearing down on and manhandling him, of course he'd say something to placate you.
Miguel winces internally and shies away from the thoughts. They fit too well with the guilt he was already stewing in, making him feel like some kind of lecherous pervert. Exactly like the kind of Alpha he's always hated.
With a faint growl of annoyance he snatches a black leather collar off the shelf, lined with soft red velvet, and stalks towards the registers. Several Beta women scatter from his path, and the faint flashes of fear he sees on their faces makes that guilt twinge all over again. He's not a monster but fuck does he feel like one sometimes.
oOo
Miles is passed out on Miguel's couch in his HQ apartment when Miguel gets back. He looks soft in sleep, if not a little ridiculous. Splayed out with limbs slightly too long for him all askew. It would be a calming sight, Miles in his home and safe, if not for the livid bruise on his throat.
What had Miguel been thinking? That's just the thing though, he hadn't been. Seeing Miles being chased after by other Alphas just brings out the worst in Miguel, gets him growling like a dog with its hackles raised. No thoughts in sight besides mine and protect and mate.
"I can feel you staring at me, stop it," Miles murmurs suddenly. He doesn't move besides slitting one dark eye open. "You're so weird, old man."
Miguel doesn't wince. He's not a man who flinches from anything. But the words old man still ricochet inside his brain. Maybe now's a good time to try and talk to Miles about this, see if he can't chase the teen off before Miguel does more damage than he already has.
Sighing, Miguel drops the collar on his coffee table then shoves Miles' legs out of the way so he can sit on the couch. Miles squawks at the rough treatment but scrambles until he's sitting up all the same.
"What's gotten into you? You're grumpier than usual," Miles snarks. Then he pauses, looks closer at Miguel, and all that teenage rebellion melts away. Concern takes it's place, his brow knitting and mouth pulling down. "What's wrong? Did something happen?"
Miguel shakes his head. "No, I just...I think we should talk."
That only makes Miles' eyes go wide. "Uh, you know that's like, the most panic inducing thing you could ever possibly say to someone, right?"
"Cállate," Miguel snaps, unable to help the harshness of his tone. Realizing he's behaving exactly how he doesn't want to, he groans and drops his head into his hands, elbows planted firmly on his knees. "Fuck, Miles, I'm sorry." The words are sour on his tongue.
"Uh..." Miles says, then Miguel can feel the couch shift as the Omega moves closer. "You're kind of starting to freak me out here, big guy. What's going on?"
"What's going on is that I'm not good for you, Miles," Miguel says without lifting his head.
There's silence for a moment. Miguel isn't really sure what he's expecting; Miles is as tenacious as a pit bull once he's sunk his teeth into something. He's not going to just walk away from this quietly.
But Miguel is the adult here and he's got to stick to his guns.
A hand on his shoulder makes the muscles in Miguel's arm jump before he can settle himself. But instead of the harsh words or tantrum he's expecting, he gets, "Miguel, tell me what you're thinking. Please?"
Miguel lifts his head in surprise, turning to stare at the teenager beside him. Miles looks concerned and sympathetic, leaning into Miguel's space with zero hesitation. Like he has no fear of Miguel at all.
Breathing out harshly through his nose, Miguel sits up straight and rolls his shoulder to knock Miles' hand off. "I'm thinking that I'm a brute of an Alpha and you're an Omega who's way too young to know what he's getting into."
Once again, he's expecting some kind of tantrum. He's seen before how much Miles hates being talked down to or treated like a child. So much of his personality is just him trying desperately to grow into the man he's going to be, but it's too soon and he can't seem to see that.
But once again Miles surprises him. He doesn't blow up, though he does roll his eyes. But seconds later he's sliding into Miguel's lap, straddling the Alpha with ease and balancing himself with hands on Miguel's shoulders.
"I'm not sure where this sudden bout of insecurity is coming from, but it ain't a good look, babe," Miles says, voice teasing and light. "Let me tell you what I see from where I'm sitting. You're a good man, a good hero, and a good Alpha. The best I could ask for, honestly. And yeah you're a bit of a brute sometimes, and overly possessive, and a massive pain in my ass, but those are part of your charm, too. I'm sure I piss you off all the time." Miles pauses, eyebrow raised and clearly inviting a response.
Miguel scowls, unwilling to play this game. "That's not-"
"Don't you dare say any of that's not true! It is and you damn well know it." When Miguel doesn't interject again, Miles continues. "I like that you're older than me, too. It makes me feel safer and better cared for. And I'm not too young to know what I want in a mate. I want you and I'm not gonna settle for anyone less. I fought this whole damn organization once and I'll do it again, your ass included, just to be your mate. ¿Comprende?"
The words tumble over themselves in Miguel's mind, his guilt warring with his absolute adoration for the boy sitting in his lap. Miles is so terribly tempting and he doesn't even seem to realize it most of the time. Most. He definitely knows it right now, the way he's peering up at Miguel through his lashes.
When Miguel doesn't respond after a moment, Miles rolls his eyes again, then leans back so he can grab the collar Miguel bought off the table. He makes an appreciative noise while he turns it over in his hands.
"This is tight, good choice," he says, pulling the tag off. Then he holds it out to Miguel. "Now collar me, Alpha."
The words send a jolt through Miguel, so strong his body jerks with it. He's not sure when his hands found Miles' hips but they're there now, squeezing hard enough he knows it has to hurt, but Miles is just smiling at him.
Fuck, there's no winning is there? Miguel can guilt trip himself all day long, can tell Miles that he's the adult here and needs to make the correct decision for both of them, and it won't matter.
Because he's so fucking gone on Miles that it isn't funny.
"Brat," Miguel growls, and snatches the collar away. "Eres un dolor en el trasero, you know that? Tambien un incordio."
Miles just laughs, because he really is a brat, and tilts his chin up obligingly as Miguel holds the collar up. "I don't recognize that last word. Incordio? What does that mean?"
"It means nuisance," Miguel grunts, tightening the black leather until it's snug but not uncomfortably tight. "Because you're the biggest nuisance I've ever met."
"Eh, I've been called worse. Try better."
"One of these days I'm going to take you over my knee," Miguel says somberly. "Maybe then you'll learn some manners."
"Kinky," Miles laughs, tilting his head back down and reaching up to touch the collar. "I really like this, by the way. Thank you, Alpha."
Miguel isn't a monster, and for some reason Miles actually makes him feel like that's true for once. The brat.
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hi! I've loved all the fic's you've posted so far! could I please make a request for something where Jamie gets officially diagnosed with ADHD and the team (and Roy and Keeley) are like 'well that makes sense' and are just so supportive through the process?
This was a doozy, anon, and I hope I’ve done it justice. Sorry Keeley didn’t get a lot of screentime - it ended up being a lot more introspective.
Thanks for the prompt!
(Prompt Fill Masterpost)
—
It wasn’t like no one had ever suggested it before.
Jamie, in fact, could clearly recall those cautious, gently probing questions Simon had ventured a few months after they’d first met. He was a teacher - a genuinely brilliant one, at that - and had recognised certain behaviours in the smart-mouthed teenager he was suddenly spending an inordinate amount of time around.
Unfortunately, Jamie had been a stubborn, prideful 16-year-old with little more than vicious dismissals for his mum’s cheery new boyfriend.
Years of school report cards and conversations at parents’ evenings echoed the same things.
If Jamie could just focus…
If he really applied himself…
If he tried a bit harder…
Exasperated teachers, tutors and coaches all leaving Jamie feeling stupid and frustrated with their attempts to guide him towards being better. Towards acting normal.
He had learned to live with the fact that some things were just harder for him than they seemed to be for everyone else. He set multiple alarms and reminders on his phone for everything he could think of. He wore jewellery and clothes that he could tug or twist or pull at without drawing too much attention to himself.
He learned to hold his tongue when he was overwhelmed and irritable for reasons he couldn’t define... and tried his best to apologise when he couldn’t keep the harsh words or knee-jerk reactions under control.
He coped.
It had finally taken a suggestion from Dr Sharon, a woman who had built up such an impressive amount of Jamie’s trust in a startlingly short amount of time that he often felt like she knew him better than he did himself, before he thought about doing anything more than that.
She had referred him to a specialist. Jamie made an appointment and answered the questions as best he could. Now, weeks later, it was official. He had ADHD.
Sitting with that information was strange. Deciding what to do with it was worse.
The first person he told was his mum. Obviously. She was reassuring and supportive, like he knew she would be, and even offered to take the train down that weekend to visit. Jamie declined, but he did have another request.
“Can you tell Simon?” he managed to choke out at the end of the call. “I think he’d like to know.”
The next conversation was a bit more complicated.
In amongst the information he’d received with his letter from the clinic were recommendations for ‘workplace accommodations’ - things that could help make ADHD easier to manage in a professional environment.
Most of it was completely irrelevant. Jamie didn’t need to sit in meetings all day or focus on a computer screen - he just needed to play football and that was the one thing he’d never had any problem with. But the advice (which Dr Sharon endorsed) was to discuss options with a manager.
Problem was, his manager was now technically Roy Fucking Kent.
And Jamie had absolutely no idea how to go about saying ‘hey, apparently my brain works differently’ to him in a way that wouldn’t end in either ridicule or dismissal.
(He was aware that he was perhaps being unfair to the man who was in many ways one of his closest friends these days. But there was a long and colourful history there that shaded every new interaction between them with the potential for chaos.)
Finally, driven half demented by days of overthinking it, he printed out a copy of his letter from the clinic and tossed it more or less directly at Roy’s head while he was filling out paperwork in his office. It mercifully landed on his desk, rather than smacking him in the face.
“Well, fuck you, too.” Roy deadpanned, fixing Jamie with a half-hearted glare and making no move to open the folded paper. “What’s that?”
“You could just fucking read it.” Jamie sulked, shoving his hands deep into the pouch of his hoodie. “‘S a letter, innit? From the doctors’.”
That had Roy frowning, what Jamie recognised as concern bunching up his brow. He picked up the document and unfolded it about as aggressively as one conceivably could. Kind of impressive, actually.
Jamie pinpointed the exact moment the information sank in and averted his gaze, locking in on the one part of the desk that wasn’t covered in files or wires or photo frames.
“Right.” Not bad, as far as reactions went. In his peripherals, Jamie saw Roy nod and readjust his hold. “... thank you. For, um, letting me know.”
“Yeah, well.” Jamie shrugged, plucking at the seams inside his pocket and studiously keeping his eyes trained on the same corner of Roy’s desk. “The leaflets and that they gave me said I should tell my boss. So. Now I have.”
“Right.” Roy repeated, agreeing like that made sense. He cleared his throat. “I know fuck all about it.”
“Join the club.”
That eased some of the weird tension that had been brewing and Roy huffed a laugh.
“Fair enough. Are you alright?”
Jamie gave that due consideration and finally dragged his stare back to Roy’s face before answering. “I think so. It’s weird, being told your brain is all…” He waved a hand around. “But it’s… nice. Knowing it’s not just me.”
Roy narrowed his eyes, assessing the truth of Jamie’s words, and seemed to accept what he said. “Is it alright if I put it in your file? Nate and Beard might have some input. Higgins should know too, probably.”
“Whatever.” Jamie chewed on his lower lip, mulling the implications over. “I don’t want to have to, like, say anything about it. But, yeah, you can tell whoever.”
“That include the team?”
Jamie sucked in air through his teeth and pursed his mouth. Why that set his teeth on edge, he didn’t know. They were good lads - not always the most sensitive but they all (Jamie included) tried extremely hard to lift each other up when a difficult topic wormed its way into the safe space of their locker room.
This wasn’t Colin coming out or Sam fighting back against racist dickheads, though. It was just Jamie and his weird fucking brain.
“Dunno. I mean. Yeah. If you want.”
If Roy noticed his hesitation, he didn’t mention it.
Not a lot changed over the next few weeks. Jamie was still Jamie, after all. His quirks hadn’t disappeared overnight or become suddenly worse.
He coped. Just a bit differently.
And so did the people around him.
A few days after his talk with Roy, Jamie was confronted by a smiling Keeley bearing a colourful gift bag: a present of cool rings that had spinning bands and mini gears he could fidget with, for ‘no reason’ other than she’d been thinking of him.
He spotted Sam with a book on the bus after a match, the title confusing him until he looked it up later. And then it cropped up again and again: on the shelf of Isaac’s locker, in the passenger seat of Colin’s car, sticking out of Jan’s bag.
Higgins approached him with a quiet and pleasantly confident assurance that the club’s management would do everything in their power to ensure Jamie was granted approval to use any medications that became necessary to his wellbeing.
The coaching team gave him a (mildly offensive) signal to use when he needed a minute, either to stick in his airpods and tune out, or to shuffle down to the boot room and breathe. More often than not, Dani would be waiting for him afterwards, beaming and ready to provide physical contact or launch into a full discussion on any inane topic he could think of.
Everyone was careful not to get outwardly annoyed when he asked them to repeat themselves or if he lost track of time. They let him talk when he went on a tangent. They were quick to forgive when he interrupted them or spoke without thinking.
They were… brilliant. It was brilliant.
Jamie carried on his therapy and worked hard to manage his symptoms and learn new behaviours. Despite Higgins’ promises, he decided against trying any of the medications offered to him, too concerned about weight loss and what (to his mind) felt like an unfair advantage on the pitch.
Diet and exercise became about more than just his job, they were further tools he could use to keep in control. He felt calmer most days and when he didn’t, Roy was there with extra workouts and an open door if he just needed a safe space.
It wasn’t perfect, of course it wasn't. Jamie still fixated on it when he fucked up and acted impulsively, screwing over his team or friends. He still let people down sometimes and struggled to understand how or why. He still needed to be held accountable. Shame at not being better still occasionally reared its head.
But that was okay.
Jamie was coping. And he wasn’t alone.
#self-projection? in MY fanfic? it's more likely than you think#fic prompts#my fic#jamie tartt#roy kent#ted lasso#afc richmond
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Just some fun procrastination until I finish “Thoughtless…” I call this one…
“Let’s Stay In Tonight”
TW; violence. assault. mentions of blood. nothing too graphic, just a hungry thug.
A/N: NOT Proofread but working on it.
“Stay in? Stay in where?” You quirked a brow, looking to your- Well you weren’t sure what to call him. He was a guy you’d known for few months and in those few months you had dated for only one of them.
Never would you have ever thought you’d end up dating a model. Especially Choi San.
“Stay in at my place.” He answers so casually and your mouth opens, yet without words.
Usually that meant one of every few things. That and well, you knew he was pretty rich…You’d feel out of place probably walking into some lavish geometric abode, compared to your modest studio apartment.
In that moment it had felt like time had gone by so fast. As if the both of you had been dating for longer than it was already. You’d only been on four dates with him and it wasn’t exactly off to a very romantic start…At least not in the beginning.
One month ago…
You had just begun your shift at a modest little cafe run by a single owner and where their were only two other workers, including yourself. It was a small business, but very popular. It got business very quickly so learning all the proper procedures and recipes was done from staying on your toes. But you had a knack for the barista life and loved your little job at the cafe. That was until…
“Hello! Welcome!”
You heard the bell above the door ring as it opened. Though you never looked up to see them as you were still wiping off the counter, getting ready to finish opening.
“I’m sorry, you came a bit early, so we’re still getting opened up so it might be a bit of a-“
You went to apologize as you heard the man approach the counter, but before you could finish, he speaks.
“Ah, it’s fine. I’ve got time. Especially if you’re the one I’m waiting for.”
You stop mid swipe of the towel across the counter- His words were smooth and you could hear the smile in them. You had to admit, they did make your cheeks a little warm but at the same time- It was too early in the morning for this.
“Sir-“ You finally look up to see the man and fuck- Why was he already annoying AND gorgeous?
“Hm?” He gives a totally intrigued look, obviously expecting something but in his defense you were staring…
“U-uhm…Just give me your order sir, and I’ll make sure you’re served first when everything is prepared.” You answered, in a somewhat forced cheery tone. Obviously annoyed.
He tilts his head a bit giving you a confused look for some reason. As if he expected you to say something else. You raise a brow at him. “Your order?”
He shakes his head and clears his throat. “Of course. Im going to try your macchiato. Hot, caramel please, add a extra shot.”
As the man spoke, digging about to take out his wallet, and eyeing the bakery selection, you did notice a few things. He was very well-kept. Dressed in all black, but you’re pretty sure in a brand that most people you knew couldn’t afford. His jawline was damn near perfect, he hair was coiffed and slicked without a single stray except the strands that were left to frame. You also noticed his wallet. Also very expensive.
To be honest, he seemed very out of place to you now to be in your little cafe, and it made you curious- But he had an ego you didn’t want to prod at. So you kept to your own thought’s until he added a strawberry scone to his to order, and passed you the money.
You thanked him, and finished wiping the counter, now turning around to see what else needed to be done- But instead you were met by two pairs of eyes, peeking over the little island in the cages kitchen. It was your other two co-workers, also your best friends, crouched down and being nosy.
“What the heck?” You stopped, giving them a look.
“Do you have any idea who that was!?” One of them whispers loudly.
“Do you!?” The other girl follows up.
“N…No? H- hey be careful!” Your friends had come from behind the island so quickly and rushed you, making you turn around to the man’s direction. He was now sitting at the furthest corner by the window, piddling around on his phone.
“That’s Choi San!” The girl whispered loudly.
“THE Choi San!” Your other friend followed up.
“Okay? The Choi San who?” You asked, intrigued since the name meant absolutely nothing to you.
Your friends gasped and you rolled your eyes. They were literally so dramatic.
“Don’t you read?! Watch television, look at magazines?!” On of the girls rambled.
“He’s a model! From that really big agency that just signed that soloist you like! And he’s about to be in a new drama.”
“His acting is soooo good!”
Meanwhile as your friends ranted on, you had to admit it made you even more curious. What was a guy like that doing in a little nook of a cafe like this?
“Okay, okay! Well we’ll talk about it after work, come on guys he actually has an order we need to get ready! Other customers will be here soon.” You turn around making your friends do the same, and shoving them along to their duties.
Meanwhile, what none of you had known, was that SAN’s phone wasn’t even on. And he was taking his fingers around on the dark screen, just entertaining himself with everything you and your friends were saying.
A week later…
Ever since then- Ever since, “the” Choi San had decided to visit that cafe, every single day. He would always come in at the buttcrack of opening, and right before closing. He hadn’t missed a single day or opportunity to get on your nerves. His empty little flirting that irritated you and nosy little questions. Though he did make you smile a time or two…Or three. Maybe four. You didn’t want to feed his ego. Guys like him weren’t really your type and you’re pretty sure he was just after one thing. But you had gotten used to the routine and he wasn’t a TOTAL jerk at least…You occasionally had to curse yourself for finding excuses for him because there was no way he could look that good, and NOT be the egotistic stereotype. Your friends constantly drooled over him and that’s the types they usually went for. So you couldn’t be wrong.
Later that evening though…
You and your friends were closing up. All that was left was some little cleaning and waste, so you let your friends leave early.
“I can’t believe he didn’t show…” One of your friends posted as she shuffled around the counter, hugging her bag, coat draped over her shoulder.
“Me either- He probably gave up and ran off thanks to that hard ass over there.” Your other friend added and you looked up to see both of them giving you an evil.
You couldn’t help but laugh. “If he’s gone because he didn’t get something he wanted like that-? That’s not a problem for me. Now go on, get home.”
Jokingly one of your friends gives you a nasty look up and a down while the other clicks her tongue.
“We worked closing today, it’s only 9! We’re going to the club. When your done meet us, huh?”
You stopped what you were doing, bringing a finger to your chin and giving a hum as you pretended to think. “Mmm, I don’t know…My friends were really upset with me-“
“Oh you whore, just come!” She stamped her and foot and you laughed. She knew very well you’d there.
You shooed them out and told them that your all meet up in about an hour to head out. Though a few minutes later, you heard the bells from the door chime.
“What did you forget?” You asked without turning around to see them as you were counting the bakery waste for the day.
“Ah- Nothing actually I was waiting.”
You hear a familiar voice and whip around to see none other than Choi San. This time dressed a little more casually. A simple blazer with some slacks, all black of course, Eleuthera a rather form fitting black shirt.
“Well hello- Your fan base just left really pissy you didn’t show up today.” You joked, and getting his little chuckle after that was kinda worth it.
“Mm- I’ll make it up to them later.” He shoves his hands in his pockets as he saunters up to the counter. “I actually was waiting to see you…Alone.” He admits, and you tilt your head to the side.
“Me? Alone?” You look around as if you’re going to find another person inside the cafe. “Me for what?”
“Well I-…I-“ He starts- Then begins to look a bit confused. Hands digging into his pockets and fricking himself at this point. “Shit- Hold on.”
You couldn’t help but find it a bit amusing, watching him run out of the store. Watching mister perfect finally having an everyday normal persons malfunction- Thiugh you weren’t sure his issue was, you went on o back counting waste until he returned.
You heard the bell.
“Well that was quick. What’d you go do?”
There was no answer.
“Well?” You turned around to face him, but only saw another man standing inside as well. He looked absolutely deshovled. Really rough, and he HONESLTY reeked of alcohol. “I’m sorry sir…but we’re uh, we’re closed…”
“Please ma’am I’m just hungry- I’ll take anything, just please before you out it in the trash?”
“Sir, I-“ You stop and sigh. You were usually told not to do things like this, but you could tell the man seemed like he really needed a meal. All you had were desserts but at least it was something. “I can bag you up a few things, just- Wait right there.” Yo turned back to the waste you were counting, picking what you had left that was still considerably fresh, so the man wouldn’t be given anything stale.
Of course, it was all in vain…
All of a sudden, a strong hand grips you by the hair, causing you to scream as he snatches you back. Your hands reach up to try and grab his.
“Stop it, let me go! Stop!”
The man had such a tight grip on your hair, you could feel his dirty fingernails digging into your scalp, and you screamed again. He was dragging you out to the floor where he threw you down onto a corner. You held your hand over the pain as you tried to scuffle back, and he grabs you by your leg, dragging you back towards him. You kicked and flailed and you could feel your blowsnlanding but this guy didn’t seem to car. The poor old man was suddenly some freak with a crazed look in his eyes and a sick smile on his face.
He simply licks the blood from his bottom lip and fights you down to the floor, trying to get on top of you. But he’s never get it. You may have been scared but you still screamed and fought and managed to keep him off of you long enough until…
Suddenly the man’s entire weight was gone, you quickly scuffling back into the corner to see San- Lifting the man up by the back of his clothes, and throwing him over the counter. As the man hit the floor, he quickly made an attempt to scurry up and make a run for the door.
“So you like to hurt women?! Look at her!” Just as the man had grabbed you by your hair, San had taken and handful of his and dragged him back to face in your direction. You weren’t sure what wa s happening now and you looked between San and the filthy man that had cursed him.
Without a word, he slams the man’s head down onto the counter. “Apologize. You should apologize after doing something wrong.”
It was literally only a few seconds after San spoke that he slams the man’s face into the counter again. “I said apologize!”
“I-I’m sorry! I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” The man finally pleads and San looks to you.
“Are you hurting? Does it still hurt?” He asks you as you finally lift yourself up off the floor, wincing a bit as you touched the back of your head, bringing your fingers around to see blood on them.
That was an answer enough for San. He slams the man’s face against the counter once more, before father him up by his clothes again, and throwing him over one of the tables in the cafe. The man backing himself into the corner, much like you had done earlier trying to escape. You heard him pleading for whatever mercy he thought hed be shown, and was only met with a heel to his head, officially knocking him unconscious.
“Did you jsut kill him ?!”
“No? But I can?” He looks over his shoulder and says it to you as if it’s nothing. “Just call the police. We’ll wait for them to come get this guy.”
You gave San a look, watching th way he was watching the man on the ground. Did the guys deserve it? Yeah he sure as shit did. But yeah no way was murder an option. After you made the call and explained everything that happened, the police were on their way along with an ambulance. Taking your statement and arresting the man, while the treated your wound. Even San’s manager had rushed to the scene and wasn’t happy about his Anne being all over the news now with an incident like this, but he insisted that he was helping a ‘friend.’
A friend ?
Were you friends?
It felt odd to call him your friend but it also felt a bit odd to call him anything less than that…
“Well the medic said you shouldn’t drive home with that head injury. So I’ll take you home.” After everything was done and the scene was clear, San was offering you a ride home.
“Ah- I don’t need one I take the bus home it’s fine. But thank you-“
“Im driving. You home. Your hurt, and I jsut want to make sure you get home safe.”
You sighed, giving the man a defeated look. After all of that and well- Him most likely saving your life, you really couldn’t say no.
“Alright…Alright, fine where’s your car?”
“The blue one there.” He points to the only blue car on the block, and it was reflecting under the street lights in all its steely glory.
He walks you over to the car and you stop before you even approach it. It was a steel blue, Genesis G90.
“I-it’s…It’s so nice.” You gawk at the vehicle, slowly tipping around to the passenger side as he opened the door for you.
“I’m glad you like it. Because I hate it” He smiles as you climb in, giving him a dumbfounded look.
After he finally gets in, you look him as is if he’s lost his mind.
“How could you hate a car like this?! It’s so pretty! Oh, and it’s so comfortable!” You let yourself melt into the seat, resting your sore head back against the cushion. “I want to die right here. It’s perfect.”
The man couldn’t help but laugh at your reaction. Of course he wasn’t going to say it then, but im he found it all too cute. But he was glad to see that you weren’t so shaken up anymore after everything that happened.
“Well there’s a difference between trying to be pretty and trying to show off. I didn’t even get to choose it. My manager makes me drive it. My company bought it.” He admits after fastening his seat belt and then starting the vehicle.
You give him a curious look as the car begins to move. The ride really is so smooth you can’t even tell it’s running.
“So you don’t…Like all these things?” You ask him as you run your fingers along the sleek dash of the interior.
“I like having nice things. But I don’t like boasting…That’s not exactly me.” He says as his eyes are focused on the road.
You hum to yourself wanting to ask more questions, but you keep to your thoughts for now. Seems San may not have been the stereotype you thought he was.
Ring ring !
Suddenly your phones rings and you pull it out of your bag to see who’s calling.
“Oh no! Hello-!” You answer the phone quickly to see it’s your friends. Hearing the loud music in the background as you answer.
“Where are you? Did you forget ?!”
You groan rubbing your forehead. “No I’m sorry there was some mess at work and I think I’m gonna stay in for tonight.”
“Trouble? What happened?”
“Uhm- Well- “ you didn’t want your friends to worry and rush over to your house but you also don’t want to lie to them.
“Y/n!? What happened?”
Before you could open your mouth to say anything else, San take your phone from you.
“Hello? This is San- Yes, your regular. I wasn’t able to come see you girls on time, but I did show up in time to see your friend had a pretty bad fall and hit her head. She can’t drive and I just want to make sure she’s home safe…Yes- Of course- Ahh, you girls have fun- Oh? You want me to come over after? Well just give me the name and we’ll see~. Thank you~.” He hangs up abruptly and then holds your phone out to you…And you snatch it from him.
“You really have to stop and make DATE plans with my friends on top of that excuse too?”
He gives you a surprised look. “Well you seemed like you were struggling and they know you’re okay. Problem solved.”
“You LITERALLY just made a date with the two of them.”
San shook his head with a sigh. “It’s not a date, I was invited. If you want, I can tell them everything when I see them.”
“Oh so you are going to see them.” You grumble turning to face the window. Arms folded.
“I-“ Sam glances at you. “Y/n?” You didn’t answer him and he turns his attention back to the road. “Are you jealous?”
You scoffed, letting out a chortle as you spoke. “Jealous? I’m not jealous, jealous for what?”
“Well then why do you care so much?”
“I don’t.”
“You obviously do.”
“Do whatever you want.”
“I already do.”
“Okay, good!”
Suddenly the car stops, and you look forward to see that you’re at a red light. The silence is suddenly heavy in the car, and you take your attention back out to the window. You hear San fiddling around but you don’t pay him anymore kind than that. After which, you feel something touch you. On your lap. And the car is in motion again. You look down to see a small, flat square box on your lap.
“What?” Is all you say as you look down at the box.
“I wanted to go on a date with you.”
Your eyes widen a bit before your brows are knotted in confusion. “What?!”
“When I left you alone in the cafe. I was going back to find where I had left that in the car. I waited for your friends to leave so I could ask you to dinner one on one…Then everything else happened.”
As you listened on to his little confession, you carefully picked up the little black box in your hand, and slowly lifted open the lid. You noticed the design of a velvet choker adorned with a hanging bow made of Swarovski crystals and a set of teardrop pearls dangling at the ends of the bow shape crystals. After that you noticed the brand name on the inside of the box, “Joomi Lim”. You gasped and quickly shit the box.
“This is expensive! This isn’t how you ask someone on a date!”
“Well I noticed the kind of things you wear and I thought it would suit your style.” Is all he says before adding. “And it isn’t really all that expensive.”
“Maybe not for you!” You scoff before looking down at the box in your lap. It REALLY was your style. But it was also REALLY something that was too expensive for just asking someone on a date.
Soon, the car stopped and he’s looking up at your apartment.
“So this is your place?” He asks as he puts his vehicle into park.
You didn’t say anything to him and climbed out of his car so fast. San looking confused and quickly climbing out after you.
“Hey- Hey!” He calls to you as you make your way to the door of your apartment.
Before you go inside, you stop abruptly and turn quickly to face him. Holding the box out towards him.
“I can’t accept this. Not for a date.”
“I…” The look on his face is so defeated, but he slowly take the box from your hands.
“My friends my be all googly eyes at your sparkly gifts but that’s not going to win me over. I really am thankful you saved me tonight, but don’t spend your money like that on a girl you barely know.”
“Then jsut go out with me/“
“San-“
“One date! One date and let me get to know the girl so maybe she’ll accept my gifts…I don’t want your eyes to sparkle at my gifts, but at me.” He admits and there’s something in the look on his face that just leave you dumbfounded, staring at him even though he’s waiting for an answer from you.
You move your mouth to speak, but there’s no words. Your phone begins to buzz constantly in your pocket, but as soon as you take it out of your pocket, he’s taken it from your hands again.
“Let’s exchange numbers. You’ll text me when you’re feeling better or if you need anything.” He says all while ignoring the mass of texts from your friends, before holding your phone back out to you.
You give him a soft glare before snatching it from him. “Thank you for helping me…But I think I’ll be okay from here. Goodnight, San.”
With that, you make your way into your apartment. Quickly going up to your floor, punching in your code, and slumping against your door with a heavy sigh. You took your phone into your hands seeing all the mass texts from your friends trying to probe you about San. You sighed, ignoring them for a moment and going to look at SAN’s name in your contacts. Moments later as if he knew, you saw that he had started typing.
I’m sorry
But I don’t want to date your friends
Consider going out with me
Sleep on it, and sleep well
Goodnight 💤
After getting his little string of messages, you move about your little apartment quickly, running over to your bedroom, now peering out the window where you could see him finally climbing into his car. You bite your lip, thinking for a moment before sending him a simple message to drive safe. You can see him checking his phone from the driver seat before he’s peering up to finally see you at your window. Giving you the biggest smile before obnoxiously revving his engine, and speeding away.
“Freak.” You can’t help but laugh to yourself, now slumping down onto your bed.
A date with Choi San.
Definitely worth being considered.
The following weekend…
The weekend had finally arrived. You enjoyed four days off from work recovering from your injury and getting a little pampering for yourself with the help of your friends and…Then some. You were able to enjoy a good time at the club yesterday in now today… You clipped on a simple pair of crystal earrings. They weren’t anything too flashy but they suited you well. You looked over your hair, your makeup, and the black, draped, satin split thigh cami dress that you still had in your closet from a dinner party last year. It was for a different friends wedding and was probably one of the most elegant things you owned. Thank God it was perfect for the current occasion and you wouldn’t have buy another one.
You went back into your bedroom, slipping on your heels. Just as you had gotten the second one settled on, you heard a car horn outside. You smiled. A big grin across your lips- Before shaking your head and catching yourself. Wondering why you were so excited, no way were you going to be that excited. It wasn’t anything to be grinning so big about- It was just- Him.
Hearing the car horn again you roll your eyes this time quickly grabbing your bag and making your way downstairs and out of your apartment. As you did, he was standing there waiting for you, at this car, passenger door already being opened for you.
Choi San. Choi San and your first date.
You saw the look on his face and his eyes were literally, all over you. He looked surprised and at the same time there was something else behind his eyes that he just couldn’t help. He was only a man after all.
“Well, when you told me where you made the reservation, I had to look the part- Like what you see?” You teased, giving him a slow spin, to let him have a full view. The big smile you had tried so hard to get rid was right back on your face when you looked at him.
“You really wanna know?” He says in a certain tone that his him eyeing you up and down and you only shake your head before climbing into his car. He shuts the door and quickly makes his way around to pile into the drivers seat.
You would’ve freely ogled him as well, but…There was something about his eyes. Something in them that you liked to see when he looked at you. It felt good. You only knew the guy for a couple weeks but he looked at you…Genuinely. Not just the hungry eyes of a man on a mission, but a genuine, curious gaze. Almost puppy like sometimes.
“Hey? Did you hear me?”
San’s voice finally snapped you out of your thoughts and you looked over to him. “I’m sorry, what were you saying?”
He laughed before he spoke again. “I asked if you’ve ever been to the restaurant before? Since you picked a dress for the place.”
“Ah- I haven’t been to that one, but I went to another similar one for a wedding dinner party. So I know a thing or two about boujee eateries.” You said with a little shimmy of your shoulders.
“Well aren’t you in a good mood- Your head is all better, yeah?” He asks, and as he does you feel a hand gently caressing the back of your head. Careful not to hurt you? Carefully not to mess up your hair?
Whatever it was, it sent a shiver down your spine, especially when warm fingertips danced down your nap before he pulled his hand away.
“I- Uhm.” You swallowed. “Yeah it’s fine- It’s fine uh, completely healed. It wasn’t that bad. You know.” You were fiddling with your bag in your lap now.
“I’m sorry, thinking about it- You probably don’t wanna talk about it right now.” He says and you shake your head.
It’s not the situation at all, it’s the way your whole body started screaming because of his fingertips. Fucking fingertips. Seriously what were you a giddy girl in junior high all over again. You scolded yourself before looking to him.
“I don’t mind talking about it you just- Ask about me a lot, but I’m really okay. You jsut seem a lot more bothered by it than I am?” You lean a bit to see his face, teasing but the way he exhales tells you something else. “San?”
“I have a sister. She was getting off of work late and was trying to get home and she was attacked kind of like you were. He was one of our own employees at the office. She took a pretty big blow to the head and when she was resting at the hospital…Well, it was a month later until my sister finally opened her eyes again.”
“Oh…Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” A frown graces your expression now but for some reason he smile.
“Oh she’s absolutely fine now- And it’s okay how would you know?” He asks, glancing over to you for a moment.
“I guess you’re right.” You still couldn’t help but feel a bit mopey about the whole thing.
“Hey.” He takes a hand from the steering wheel, holding it out obviously wanting yours. You out your hand in his, and he brings it to his lips, your entire face matching the red lights in the distance you’re sure. “That’s what tonight is for. To get to know each other better.”
And for the rest of the drive, that’s where your hand was. In his. Fingers intertwined. His thumb occasionally rubbing over yours. Talking and going about it all so casually as if he was so comfortable. It’s not that you were uncomfortable, but you didn’t expect the little things to be having such a big affect. I guess you might have to admit it…You might have a thing for Choi San.
After you got to the restaurant, which was a little more than you had thought- Two valets approached his car, opening the doors for you both, and taking his keys. Leaving you to turn around to him looking a bit appalled.
“Okay so is this dinner or an event because I feel like a Disney Princess-“ You ask him as you look at the small line of people and a man with a GUEST list at the front of the entrance.
He laughed. “It’s just a pretty restaurant like any other. Except it has dinner and dancing.”
“Dancing? What- You didn’t- You didn’t say anything about dancing I-“ You laughed nervously looking all around as if there was anywhere to run.
“Y/n-“ He places his hands on your shoulders. “You don’t have to dance if you don’t want to. It’s just a theme. Not some stuck up ballroom gig. Now turn around and close your eyes.”
“Excuse me?”
He rolls his eyes and turns your around himself. Opening your mouth to bicker you only huff and mutter something under your breathe. Now feeling something soft and a bit snug around your neck and his fingers fiddling with a clasp.
“You didn’t-“
“I knew you’d end up wearing something to suit it, so yes I did. If you want to give it back after the date that’s fine, but I want to see you wear it. At least once.” He admits and you sigh.
It was indeed the same choker that you had returned to him a few days prior, the night everything else had happened.
“Fine. I mean- It suits me anyway right?” You going your fingers up to plays with the dangling crystals.
“Definitely.”
And with that, he offers you his arm, leading you inside. The man didn’t even bother checking the guest list, simply smiling and nodding at San as the two of you skipped the line, and went straight inside. Definitely not what you were expecting, but you couldn’t help but appreciate the privilege. You were starting to feel more like San was a prince and not some model and actor.
“My fathers a politician.” He whispers to you suddenly as he brings you closer, keeping you close to him as you move through the other tables to get to your own.
“Ah…Was I thinking that loud?” You joke and he puts a smile on his face.
“Your face said it all.”
After getting to your table, which appeared to be a nice little private are. With maybe 6 other tables in the room and an open area for dancing, the place looked gorgeous. Definitely not an aesthetic you expected to see a lot of in Korea, but it was nonetheless eye catching. The waiters pulled out your chairs for you, and already had a bottle of wine waiting at your table. They gave you your menus, and promised to be back with you momentarily. As you opened the menu you immediately shut it.
“San- Oh my god, what are they charging you for the whole crop !?” You whisper at him loudly.
“Don’t worry about the price, I don’t even pay for anything when I come here. And I’ve never been here.” He glances up above his menu giving you a look.
“What do you mean?”
“Well” He starts, flipping through the menu. “My father and some friends invest in the place. So my dad pays for my visits. But I’ve never actually come here.”
“But I thought you’d have been on lots of dates before…?” You ask now slowly opening the menu.
“I have.” He answers. “But not with girls that I would bring to a place like this. Not with girls I really liked.”
He says that and your eyes are wide, staring at him over the menu. His gaze meets yours and you can tell he’s smiling so big, quickly hiding back behind your menu.
After finally ordering and still unable to shake the feeling that this was going to dig a pretty steep ditch in someone’s wallet, you tried to focus on actually enjoying your meal, which was delicious, and your date, who was…Probably the most amazing guy you’ve actually met. Despite his lifestyle. You had asked you more questions than you were able to ask him. He was genuinely curious about you and all the thing you liked, where you wanted to go, your even shared a few stories about your childhood and your worst dates. The man you were sitting at the table with didn’t seem anything like the guy you would see when he was around your friends or other girls. Why, your friends had even met a bet that he was going to talk about himself the entire date or try to take you home. So far most of the conversation was about…You.
And now, you were in his arms, completely sharing your personal space with this man on the dance floor. You weren’t really a slow dancing or waltz kind of girl, but you knew how to. And the way he looked down at you was almost overwhelming. His eyes were reading your mind you were sure, and you were surprised with how warm and fuzzy your head was getting, you weren’t tripping over yourself. But something in his smile told you he knew the affecting he was having.
“You know I won’t bite, right?”
“Shut up, I didn’t say anything.” You counter, clearing your throat.
“You’re a really good dance though? A little stuff but, we can work on that.” He says before sending you out for a twirl and bringing you back in to be met with a scoff.
“Oh, so what’s that supposed to mean?” You ask, tilting your head a bit.
“What do you think it means?” He quirks a brow, that annoying but sexy smirk tugging at his lips.
“I think it sounds like someone assuming he’s getting another date?” You question, your hand that was at his shoulder now playing taking your fingers down to tease his chest.
“Well..I-“ This time he clears his throat, and looks away from with the most wounded expression and you can’t help but laugh, hiding your face in his chest to muffle the cackle.
“Yeah, how does it feel?” You tease looking back up at him with the biggest grin and you could see him failing to hide a smile.
“Oh shut up.”
“It’s okay.” You laugh. “We can go out again, for sure but maybe…Tone it down like 50 notches?”
He nods, giving you a sigh. “Agreed. To be honest I had no idea where I was going, I just started following the stuff that came to me in time before I embarrassed myself.”
This time you’re throwing a hand over your mouth to contain your laughter. This time he didn’t complain or tell you to shut up but he only smiled. Watching you get it all out of your system through a mess of laughing apologies.
“Glad to see you’re having so much fun then.”
“I’m sorry! I-I am I just- You’re really- You’re really a different guy than what I had started to think.” You finally calm yourself down, looking up to him with a smile. At this point your body was completely comfortable against his, and you’re sure you were mostly swaying at this point than slow dancing, but you didn’t really care. You had a feeling he didn’t either.
“Well I meant it. I’m glad you’re having fun. I’ve never had- A real first date like this. Definitely not one that was actually more talking and less- Well I think you get it.”
“I think I do.” you move your arms now to wrap them around his shoulders completely and you see the hues of pink rise in his cheeks and the goofiest grin on his face making you laugh again. “But this floor is killing my feet and I’m sure it’s way past midnight, so why don’t we call it a night, huh?”
“Ah- Shit..” he mutters. “I forgot you opened in the morning. I shouldn’t have-“
You press a finger to his lips. “It’s seriously okay. I had fun.”
After that, the two of you had gathered your things from the table. Leaving a tip for the waiter, the musicians, and the valet on your way out, and were back inside his car and on your way back to the apartment. Your face had never hurt so much from so much smiling and laughing. The two of you never stopped talking and the way San told his stories about some of his friends when he was in his element, probably would have had you on the floor. The two of you even turned on the radio and sang and danced along to most of the songs that came on. Even a few rap titles. He was actually so silly, and pretty sweet. Such the opposite of whatever stereotype you originally pegged him with…But in the back of your mind you didn’t want to let yourself get too deep. Unfortunately, that was too late.
As you reached your apartment, you looked up to your floor with a sigh. It was 1:30AM and you had work at 6AM. But nonetheless you still had such a good time, and honestly didn’t even feel that exhausted anymore now that you were here.
As he usually had in any other case, San comes around to open your door for you, helping you out of the car.
“Ill see you in the morning?” He asks you as he clothes the door to the passenger seat.
You sigh, now leaning back against his car for a moment. Looking up to him with a certain look. “I guess I’ll see you in the morning…I really did have a lot of fun tonight.”
“I did too. Definitely the best date I’ve ever had.”
After saying this, he moves to take your hand in his, raising it to his lips, and placing a kiss over your fingers. You feel that same feeling once again that you had when he had done the same thing in the car but…Something else.
“Is that all?”
You ask suddenly, surprising yourself for a moment as you didn’t actually mean to say the words the way you did. San now giving you a mirroring look. You swallowed. You didn’t want to say it. You knew exactly what you wanted it but you couldn’t verbally admit it. Your pride was already hurting from the surely pleading and desperate look you were giving the man. His eyes were glued to yours and he was in your space all over agains. Hands coming up in mere second to cup your face before his lips are on yours. Your body pressed back against his car and your arms thrown around his shoulders again. Making him move his hands from your face to grip at your waist. It was a bit rough, but the longing and passion was definitely reciprocated. He kissed you like he was hungry and you did the same, humming into his mouth the moment you felt a tongue slip past your lips. You didn’t bother challenging him this time, and comply let your tongues dance, letting him claim your mouth, tasting the delectable flavor that was Choi San now definitely stuck in your senses.
Yeah. You definitely had a thing for Choi San.
The next few weeks that passed, were almost perfect. San would come to see you every morning when he could and every night when he could. You would spend time with him on your days off, not full blown dates, but lazing around a park, going for a driven, and even spending time at your apartment. Cooking, cleaning, watching dramas, even taking a nap together. And not once had he tried to anything well, frisky. It was amazing. Even with his schedules keeping him away from you from time to time. Yet- Nothing was more miserable than this week. You wouldn’t be seeing San at all. He wouldn’t even be in the country. He had to fly out for work and it wouldn’t be back from finishing his scenes for an entire week. He called you of course. Had lunch sent to your work, and you FaceTimed. But it just made you want even more. You missed his smile everytime he saw you, hearing laugh right there next you, his hands, his lips, the way you could see his eyes shine when he looked at you. Everything that was Choi San. Was now thousands of miles away and you wanted to melt into the ground.
I’ll be back on the first flight tonight, so you’ll see me tomorrow morning
You click your tongue letting out an obnoxious sigh. “That’s still way too long you just don’t want to see me.”
Come on now-
“Probably posted up with one of your foreign side pieces.” You tease with a smile on your face.
You are the most unfunniest person I have ever met
You could hear the deadpan in his voice and couldn’t help but laugh. “Im sorry, I had to.”
Uh huh. What are you doing anyway.
“Well- I was, going to the club with my friends. This new place that just opened with an indoor pool, like what?! But then they flaked on me. So now-“ You paused as you were going to dig around for your pajamas. “Im getting changed, and gonna post up.”
Oh? That’s too bad. I really liked your dress.
“Yeah, we’ll-“ You paused for a moment. “Wait what?”
The sexy little red number you have on.
You furrow your brows for a moment before looking around your apartment- Then darting to your bedroom window. Now looking out to see San, leaning against his car and looking up at you with grin. You squeal, hanging your phone up immediately and you have never moved so fast down a flight of stairs. The moment you hit the pavement he was moving to meet you halfway, taking you up in his arms at you threw your arms around his shoulders and your legs around his waist. Peppering him with kisses.
“You ass, why didn’t you just say you were home?!”
He laughed against your lips, before pulling away, gently setting you back on the ground. “I wanted to surprise you. I may or may not have told your friends to do my a little favor…”
You smiled even bigger knowing what he meant, and couldn’t have been happier. Though you still really wanted to check out the club, this was still something you’d take any day.
“You wanna come inside? When did you even get back you must be exhausted.” You take his arms from around you now to hold his hands in yours, intertwining your fingers, and of course he’s raising your hands to his lips.
“I was thinking maybe we could have another date night.” He says, still taking his time place a kiss across each of your fingers.
“Oh? And where did you have in mind?”
“I thought maybe we’d stay in-“
“Stay in? Stay in where?” You quirked a brow, looking up to him. “Oh, you-…You want to stay another night at my place?”
“Stay in at my place.” He answers so casually and your mouth opens, yet without words.
Usually that meant one of every few things. That and well, you knew he was probably pretty rich at this point…You’d feel out of place probably walking into some lavish geometric abode, compared to your modest studio apartment.
“Unless you don’t want to?” He suddenly asks, you didn’t even realize how long you took to respond.
“Oh-! No, no I’d love to see your place.” You say with a pout before wrapping your arms around his waist, now smiling up at him.
He smiles at you, now cupping your cheeks before planting a kiss on your lips. “Good. Don’t change. Keep your swimsuit and pack an overnight bag.”
After that, he lets you go and quickly runs around to the driver side of his car.
“Wait- Wait! An overnight bag?! Hey!? Hey!”
He didn’t answer you, only blasting some super loud love song, now rolling down the window and singing the song at the top of his lungs and point to you as he danced in his seat to the lyrics. You couldn’t help the smile on your lips and shook your head before running back inside. Quickly packing an overnight bag before running downstairs and climbing into his car. Throwing the bag into the backseat. The entire drive, you couldn’t keep your hands off him. His hand playing up your thigh from time to time, and yours playing in his hair- Teasing up his thigh- playing with his ears. Just playful little touches while the both of you talked about his trip for his movie. You didn’t even realize how much later it had already begun to get while he was driving. A good hour and then some had passed. You had eventually decided on taking a nap, leaning your head up against the window. By the time you had opened your eyes again, you were looking on a luxurious structure. Like one of the houses you’d see one of the rich characters in a k-drama living in.
“Am I…Am I still asleep…?” You murmur, squinting your eyes a bit as you looked out through the window, taking in a view.
San chuckles as he shuts off the car. “No, we’re finally here. It’s one of my dads places.”
“ONE of?” You look to him making sure you heard him correctly.
“We have his actually home- A property where his does business, then there’s my place annnnd after that there’s this house.” He says as he climbs out of the car, now reaching into the backseat to grab your overnight bag.
“And what’s this one for?” You ask, finally getting out of the car with him, eyes still glued to the house.
“This one is for uhhh-“ He stalled a bit. “Recreation.”
“Recreation, huh?” You turn around to give him a certain look, watching the smile spread on his face as he comes around the car to you. Snaking an arm around your waist.
“Just get inside you pervert.” He says before tugging you along with him.
To be honest the house is beautiful. But it didn’t have that ‘lived in’ feeling so you assumed it was very rarely used, if used at all. You mostly followed him around, getting a quick tour on your way to- Well, your way to the main bedroom. He introduced you to all the features in mundane color scheme, not that you really minded, but he didn’t seem as intrigued.
“You don’t seem too excited about the place- You must’ve been here often?” You ask him suddenly, watching as he plops down on the edge of the bed with a sigh.
“I’ve actually never been here. I just thought you would like it and well- My house is still full of movie set equipment and I don’t think you’re quite ready to meet my family yet.” He chuckles.
You give him a playful pout, shuffling over to stand in front of him as he sat on the edge of the bed. Draping your arms over his shoulders and his hands now coming to your waist.
“Awh- I’m not good enough to meet your family?” You tilt your head to the side before he shakes his head at you.
“Don’t want my family to scare you off.” He admits before spreading his legs so he can pull you closer, now nuzzling against your stomach.
You give a soft chuckle, at his actions, and he doesn’t respond with much. His hands moving from your sides now to slowly play his fingertips underneath the netting of shirt you were wearing over your swimsuit. You closed your eyes with a hum, feeling his fingertips against your skin and tilting your head a bit more. As your shirt was brought up more, it was more than his hands over your skin. His lips, pressing slow kisses against your stomach…Slow and sweet before they were wet and hungrier. Your hands gripping his shoulders now as you felt his teeth from time to time. Letting his name fall out in a sigh from your lips. You weren’t sure where this was going, but you didn’t want to think right now. Just enjoy the sensations he was giving you right now. The moment you felt his hands on your breasts, you whimpered finally opening your eyes, but only to pull off the netting off a shirt and toss it to the side. The only thing stopping his actions, as he pulls you closer to straddle his lap. You could feel the erection in his jeans and there was a look in his eyes that made you want to just give in and give him everything. For that moment that you were absently rolling your hips against him, your soft pants loud in the emptiness of the room- He changes your positions, putting you on your back and hovering over you now. Evident lust in his eyes as he leans down to whisper in your ear….
“Get ready for the pool~”
And with that you see the biggest grin on his face as pulls away from you, now going over the dresser, to pull out a random pair of black swim shorts. You prop up on your elbows with an utter look of disbelief on your face.
“You’re kidding me?”
“What? You don’t wanna swim?” He says giving you the most innocent look and you’re grabbing a pillow of the bed to fling it at him. Watching him laugh before he runs out of the room and you only chase after him with the other pillow.
Some time had passed with your little playful game of cat and mouse around the house before you were actually settled into proper swimwear. You only having to take off your shorts. And after the embarrassing conversation since you failed to mention you couldn’t really swim- You were just fine watching your shirtless boyfriend swim around and splash at you from the pool while you two just passed the Tim until the stars hung so high. You’re sure it was much closer to midnight, but you didn’t care. But your mind had begun to wander. So much that you guess the look on your face made San worried as he swam closer to you with a concerned expression.
“What’s wrong? What’s the look for?”
You sigh shaking your head before speaking.
“It’s really just…We’ve been dating for like a month…I didn’t know you were- rich rich and I mean I just- It’s embarrassing that I didn’t even know who you were when we met…”
You hear the chuckle come from his lips and the splash of the water as he moves over to edge of the pool where you sat.
“Don’t be- That’s kind of what made me attracted to you. I don’t get to meet a lot of people that just- Be themselves around me you know?” He looks up at you with the most sincere gaze and your heart does a dangerous thing.
“Ah, well…I was kind of bitch when we met-“
“You have a strong sense of self.”
“I called you an asshole.”
“And my manager took your coffee and your parking spot.”
You both laugh as you reiterate the story. The moment felt so long ago, yet the two of you had only been about on 4 dates for the one month that you’d known him more intimately. You were a headstrong, struggling waitress and he was a silver spoon model. You had never really paid attention to his types before but- Well San was something a little different.
As you had caught yourself gazing out at the stars, you hadn’t realized how close he’d gotten until you felt his hands on your knees…Slowly spread your legs apart to put himself even closer to you. And as if he read your mind he asks you-
“What about you? What made you go on a date with me in the first place?” He asks you, wet hands rubbing up and down along your thighs.
“W-well uhm- Well I talked to my friends about you a lot. Complaining mostly- And uh- uhm they said that- They were making a bet that you’d probably spend half the date talking about yourself and…Trying to get into my pants.” You admitted a bit shamefully now and obviously distracted.
The laugh that came out of him honestly didn’t help and made your cheeks heat up even more. Kicking your legs at him but not really doing much good with him just cozy between them in the pool and you still plopped on the edge.
“I’m sorry- I’m sorry that’s just funny. I don’t sleep with anyone on the first date. It’s usually the girls that I go out with that try. But I had a feeling you weren’t like that. Of course that just made me want you more…” He admits, and you watch his gaze leave yours trailing down to somewhere else…
“W…What do you mean by that?”
“Well- You’re very independent. You gave the necklace back when I genuinely thought it might be something that suited you- I’m so used to girls that are bending over backwards for my attention…But you make me want to beg for yours.” Again, finally his eyes were back to lock with yours. Your words were stuck at your throat, especially with his curious hands working towards the obvious.
“My attention...huh?” You tried to sound confident but you’re sure he heard the tremble in your voice.
“Yes. Your attention. I was groomed and raised to be this- Perfect gentleman. Then when I got to the agency- I was given this stuck persona.” He shakes his head, now biting his lips, eyes trailing back down to the area between your legs. “But…”
“But…?” You question, swallowing the imaginary lump in your throat.
“But you make me wanna abandon all the proper gentlemen and smug model stuff. I just wanna be greedy…” His hands slowly slide back up to the strings of your bikini that were already loosely tied at your hips. “With my woman. I want you to be obsessed with me, and only me.”
You closed your eyes letting your head tilt back just a little. Trying to even out your breath as you felt him pull on the strings of your swim bottoms, untying them and taking a wet thumb already to rub between your folds, massaging over your clit.
“I know I’ve said I don’t sleep with girls on the first date…But the more time I spend with you the more I want you like this. But…It I do it then it’s just me. Only me. Even if you just wanna stick to fucking me after I’m gonna be the only guy you’re fucking.”
Your brows came together, and you whimpered just hearing his words. A chuckle coming from his lips and the motions of his thumb getting rougher, making your thighs tremble for a moment.
“I-I’m good with that…”
“Oh?” He quirks a brow. “So you just wanna fuck me huh?”
“N-no! I mean…If you wanna be the only guy-…” You bite your lip, tilting your head back even further. Not even getting to finish your sentence as he’s slowly plunging his middle finger inside you, and working his thumb back over your clit.
“Go on now, what were you saying?” He encourages, moving his finger in and out of you more suddenly as if that was his hurrying motion. Your words came out in a mess of soft moans.
“I want you, you can have me- I want you to fuck me.” You hum out not caring how it all looked or sounded right now.
Meanwhile, his eyes were on you, gawked, watching every little move you made. You miss the scene, but he licks his lips and slowly pulls his finger out of you. Then, you look back down at him with a disappointed whine, but not for long. The moment your eyes are on him, you’re watching him spread your thighs further on the pool edge, and lean in to swipe his tongue between your folds. Your grip the edges of the pool, sucking in a gasp with your jaw hanging for more moans to make their way out.
He’s teasing, slowly dragging his tongue between your folds, again and again, hands braced on your thighs. You’re moaning a lot more than you’d like to admit, but the ‘date’ was going along a lot better than you expected. Feeling his lips around your clit, sucking at the nub, your thighs jerk, closing slightly and you have a hand tangle in his wet locks. His name slips for your lips and his assault on your clit suddenly stops, and he’s slipping a greedy tongue inside you.
Both of your hands are in his hair now, back arching against nothing and sending your moans out to the stars. It’s only when you feel him lifting your legs to prop your knees over his shoulders that you have to topple back. Now propped on one hand as you catch yourself from falling on the stone. Your hips rolling now to meet the motions of his tongue- And his actions only seem to get hungrier. Chanting his name in high moans as your chest heaves, breathing becoming so frantic in the end- Your legs shake, you’re gritting your teeth and letting out a wordless cry as you release all into the mans mouth.
Panting heavily as you look down with erratic breathes, watching him pull his tongue away from you. A string of your juices still connecting his tongue to your cunt. Your eyes are teary, and you finally realize how tight you’re gripping his hair before slowly loosening your grip.
“I-I’m sorry…” You breathe out, catching your breathe finally as you move your hand from his hair, to take your fingers through yours.
For a moment you’re just there- Eyes closed trying to come down from your eyes. San’s tongue still teasing at your thighs and your pussy. Lapping up your juices, and suckling from time to time. Your body twitched from time to time before you finally grabbed him by his hair again with a groan.
“Come on, anymore of your mouth and you’re gonna dry me out.” You huff before hearing a hum come from him, hands now slowly lifting your legs from his shoulders to place them back into the water fully.
“Well- Time to get to that other part we discussed.” He says as he licks you off is his lips, hands massaging your thighs still, seeming to enjoy your trembling under his fingertips.
“O-other part?”
“Being the only guy you’re fucking part.”
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let you break my heart again (2)
part 1 | part 1.5
summary: you take the leap.
pairing: matt murdock x reader
words: 2.2k
an: i rewrote this like three times and i’m still not happy with how it turned out, bi foggy, you make the first move, gender neutral reader
cw: mild angst, fluffy, some explicit language
You didn’t know this, but later that night, Karen and Foggy started scheming. Foggy wasn’t dumb, and he’s known how you both have felt for a long while. Maybe they’d try to get you two alone in the office tonight. Or they could stage a dinner where they’d have to cancel. Every plan had a flaw. If you two were alone in the office, you might just end up working alone. Or at the dinner, no one would say anything to each other. Karen decided that it’d be best if she sat down and talked to you seriously. Although you’ve always been good at reading people, Matt was far, far better. You just needed the confidence to confess. Foggy was far less engaged in the conversation that Karen was.
Truth be told, it did kind of hurt. Foggy wasn’t in love with you (he hasn’t been since college), and he always wanted you to be happy, but he always held a tiny bit of resentment towards Matt for being far more successful in relationships than he was. Or maybe he held a tiny bit of resentment because he wasn’t the one in the relationship with him. Either way, the planning to get you two together was bittersweet. He’d be happy for you two if it went well. Or at least he tried to convince himself that was true.
“There is literally no way he doesn’t like you. He always responds differently from when me or Foggy talk to him.” Karen is perched on the edge of your desk, legs slightly swaying.
“Well he’s clearly not pining over me! And this is how he’s always treated me, it’s probably just because of Foggy. When he gets here he’s probably going to start talking with him about that woman he slept with last night.”
You glance over your desk, case files strewn about haphazardly. Everything is putting you on edge, including the chaos on your desk that is reflecting your current mental state, “Just like every other night after we go to Josie’s. Half of me wants to stop going just so I don’t have to see it. It hurts, Karen. I just want to get over him.” Your face falls into your cold palms, and you feel like your button-up is suffocating you.
“Maybe you should say something to him.” You hear her rise and you feel the gentle touch of her hand on your back.
“Maybe… I’m just so scared. I don’t want to fuck anything up.” You admitted, looking up at her kind face.
“I know. But sometimes we have to take risks. That’s why you guys started this firm. That’s why we do so much pro-bono work. And you both are mature enough to not let something like this affect your work.”
And that’s when Foggy enters. Karen stands up a little straighter and removes her hand from your back.
“Morning you two!” He’s cheery, as usual. That was half the reason you appreciate his friendship. It was ironic that his nickname was Foggy, because you always pictured him as the one who could clear the clouds away.
“Good morning Foggy. How was Josie’s last night?” You inquire with a faux nonchalance. You really just want to hear about Matt’s escapades and if he had really gone home with that woman, but you obviously weren’t going to let Foggy know.
“Oh you know, the usual. Karen left not too long after you, but I’m sure she’s told you that. Matt did seem a little off last night though.” He opens the door to his office, puts down his bag, and leans against the doorway of your office.
“Oh?” You can’t tell what his comment made you feel. A cauldron of emotions swirl in your stomach.
“Yeah, after you two left we kind of just sat there as he stared off into space. More so than usual.” Your mouth turned up slightly at his comment. You were a little confused though, there’s no reason that he would feel that way. Maybe something happened that day that you missed. Part of you started to regret going home early.
“So he… never went home with that woman? She was really gorgeous, that’s a shame.”
“Yeah, I think he was too out of it to seal the deal. Something’s up with him, and I can’t quite place it. You’d think I knew my best friend a little better.”
You gasp, faking offense. “I cannot believe you’d call him your best friend when I am right here Foggy.” The grin you were trying to hide to punctuate your teasing creeps up onto your face. Then the door opens.
“I’m your best friend?” Speak of the devil and he shall arrive. He has on a crisp suit with a burgundy tie. It’s one of your favorite colors on him, it compliments his glasses. He has a large brown paper bag in his hands.
Foggy pauses for the briefest moment. “Yeah, you are. They left us last night at Josie’s all alone, so I think they deserve a demotion of the best friend title.”
“Yeah, well I had a headache, so you’re the bad friend for not being considerate of my feelings.”
“Speaking of, why didn’t you say something before you left last night? I wanted to say goodnight.” Matt walked over and gently placed his hand on your shoulder.
You could feel your heart start to pound, and you couldn’t discern whether it was over the touch or anxiety about the question that you didn’t want to admit the answer to. “Uh… well I didn’t really want to bother you. You seemed… preoccupied.” You force a smile.
“Well, you are more important than her. You should say something next time,” Your heart skips a beat, and his hand falls from your shoulder, “I, uh, I brought bagels for everyone.” As Matt shows everyone the bag, you see the logo of the bakery beneath your apartment.
“Thank you so much!” Foggy immediately goes to grab a bagel, and goes to his office, “No rest for the weary! I’m going to work on the Maddison case, you all should get to work soon too.” His office door shuts, and Karen nods.
“I should probably get to work too. I have a lot to do today.” You shoot her a glare, knowing that she’s just trying to get you two alone. She smirks, and you sigh as you watch her escape to her office.
“When did you go to the bakery?” You try to make your question nonchalant, but you can hear your voice betray your interest.
“I guess after you left, since you weren’t there when I was there.”
“What, did you want me to be there?” You teased, but you could feel the rush of blood reach your cheeks. You silently prayed thanks that Matt could not see you.
“And what if I did?” Your breath catches in your throat.
You quickly recompose yourself. “I mean that thought process is valid, I would want to see myself too.” You hope your smirk can cover the way you reacted to his statement.
“That’s where you have it wrong. I wouldn’t see you there,” A smug look forms on his face as you roll your eyes.
“Whatever Matt.”
“You love my jokes.”
You grab a bagel and usher him out of your room. “I actually have work to do, so I’ll talk to you later.”
Matt stiffens at the sound of a knock at his office door. He was so absorbed in the case he was reading that he tuned everything else out. He takes a second and recognizes Foggy at the door.
“Come in.” He raises his voice just a little so Foggy can hear him.
“Hey, uh, Matt, can we talk?” Foggy shuts the door behind him and sits in front of Matt’s desk.
“Of course,” Matt shifts some of his papers, “What’s up?”
Foggy takes a deep sigh, and pauses before he forms his words, “You should tell them.”
Matt freezes. “W-what do you mean, Foggy?” He tries to laugh away the nervousness in his statement, and anyone else probably would have fallen for it.
“I said, you should tell them. It’s really obvious that you like them, and I can’t stand watching you two dance around each other’s feelings even though you share them.” Foggy seems sincere, but there’s some other emotion that leaves a subtle aftertaste in Matt’s mouth.
“I know, they’re pretty damn good at hiding their emotions,” Foggy shifts in his seat to inch a little closer to Matt, “but I think it’s pretty obvious that they like you. Take it from their best friend.”
“Hey, I thought you said that I was your best friend.”
“Well, you both are,” Foggy changes back to his more playful demeanor, “Anyways, here’s the plan. We’re going to order takeout for the office, and then Karen and I get pulled away by a phone call. Then you two will be all alone. You should say something or you’re probably going to regret it.” He stands up, and opens Matt’s door.
Matt can’t get a retort in before his door is open. “Alright, well, thanks for helping me out Foggy.”
The smell of Chinese takeout hits your nose, and you immediately leave your office. “Thank God, I am so fucking starving.”
“Yeah, well, don’t be too excited, because I actually got a call from a friend and they’re in the hospital right now,” Karen says, “So I’m going to go make sure they’re okay.”
“Oh my God, is everything alright?” Your eyebrows furrow in concern.
“Yeah, they said it’s just minor, but I just want to check on them. Here’s the takeout, have a nice dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Karen puts the takeout down onto the counter.
“Yeah, call me if you need anything Karen.” You change your phone from silent to vibrate as Karen scurries out of the office. Foggy and Matt step out of their offices as you start unpacking the food. Everyone has a usual order, and you set them out according to the order.
“Smells delicious. I heard Karen leaving?” Matt walks up, cane in hand, and grabs his order.
“Yeah, one of her friends is in the hospital. I hope they’re okay.” Your face is covered in worry, and you can only pick at your food. You hear the ring of a phone, and watch as Foggy picks it up.
“Hey man, what’s up? Oh fuck, I’m so sorry, I’ll swing over right away. I’m so sorry, I totally forgot. I’ll be there in ten minutes,” He quickly hangs up the phone, “Sorry, I promised Tom I was going to help him move. I’ll see you both tomorrow though!” Foggy grabs his food and rushes out the door.
“And then there were two.” The corner of Matt’s mouth was slightly lifted.
“Yeah…” Your heart starts racing, and you silently are thankful that you get some time alone with him. The air is silent and awkward for a few minutes. You swallow hard, and decide to take a leap. It was now or never.
“Hey, uh, have you ever had this before?” You gesture towards your food, knowing that Matt could probably pick up on the context.
“No, actually. It smells really good though.” He smiles, and takes a bite of his own food.
“Would you like to try?” You start panicking slightly, but you’ve already taken the first step. You won’t back down now.
“Sure.” He grins at you, and your heart leaps. His smile has always been one of your favorite things about him.
You grab a piece of your food with your chopsticks, and walk towards him.
“Open your mouth.” You lower your voice.
He looks like he’s about to protest, but opens his mouth, and you place it on his tongue. He closes his mouth around your chopsticks, and you gently draw them out from between his lips. The face he makes is beautiful, and he makes a soft Mmm sound as he savors the food.
“This is really good. I can see why you order it.”
“Do you want another taste?” You hold your breath.
“Sure, you can have-” You cut him off with a kiss.
You can taste the tang of the sauce on his lips, and you know he can too. The kiss feels like a sigh of relief. You’ve wanted to do this for such a long time, and although your nerves are tainting it, at least you’ll have done it at least once. You were kind of proud of yourself, usually Matt was the one with the smooth pickup lines. Yours wasn’t the best, but it was still pretty cheesy. You hear Matt set down his takeout container to pull you closer to him, deepening the kiss. You gently push away, and you rest your hands on his broad chest.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.” He barely breathes out, his voice so quiet you can barely hear him.
“I could say the same thing to you.” You grin, and his face mirrors yours.
#daredevil x reader#daredevil#matt murdock x you#matt murdock x reader#gender neutral reader#not canon compliant#bi foggy#not actually unrequited love#mild angst#fluff#no use of yn#no use of y/n#friends to lovers#matthew murdock x reader
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Flirting with Death
Rating: Explicit/Mature
Word Count: 2,551
Synopsis: Reader can see an Angel of death doing his day to day job when she shouldn’t. Constantly intertwined…things get more intense than ever should have between the two.
Tags: angelofdeath!Bucky, possession of the sexual variety (non-con), pnv!sex, death and other things, NO DRUNK DRIVING, Bucky is Conflicted, Lots of angst/fluff/smut like literally a whirlwind.
A/N: I don’t make the rules Bucky was chosen to be an escort to the after life when he fell. Since this is my story I’d like to believe that they **** ***** happily together. So open ending but on a good note :) Also I don’t beta I die like a true spartan
Death followed you around. Literally. You could see the grim reaper. You wished that you were just tripping balls. He had a idiotic nickname. Also he was strangely cheery and grumpy simultaneously. Bucky. You were also in love with him.
You remembered the first time you saw him.
The boy in front of you was coughing and writhing on the ground. You watched in horror as his face turned purple, unable to draw breath. Your classmates screamed and cried, the teacher trying to dislodge the toy in his windpipe to no avail.
A man was standing just outside the circle. He wore a strange blue coat. Swept dark hair and a nice looking face. He stared at the boy and checked his watch. In the midst of the chaos he just stood and waited.
You walked to his side and yanked on a blue sleeve. It was horribly cold to the touch so you ripped your hand away in shock. He jumped and looked down at you, obviously startled. The man growled, “You aren’t supposed to see me.” You didn’t know why he said that. So you asked, “Why not? I see you just fine.”
He raised a brow, mouth agape in confusion.
“You’re very cold and weird, mister.”
The man in blue shook his head and stepped forward to the boy— lifeless in the teachers arms. Sadness twisted your gut at the sight. In a flash another version of your dead classmate was next to the strange figure, who grabbed the boy’s hand. They passed you hand-in-hand.
“Forget you saw anything. Must’ve been a mistake,” he grumbled.
After that first incident, you’d seen the man in blue a two more times. He was even more surprised than you were, getting quite angry about it actually. But you shrugged and told him you had no clue why he was showing up.
By the third occasion you were 13 years old. A girl had been struck by a car after school. There he was at the crosswalk. You deadpanned, “Do I always have to see you at the sites of horrific deaths? What are you, the grim reaper?” He narrowed his eyes in annoyance, full lips in a pout.
“My boss must have fucked this up,” he groused.
“Well, are you the grim reaper or not?”
He rolled his eyes, shoving his big hands into coat pockets. “I’m not the grim reaper, girl.” You frowned at his rude tone and spat, “What are you then? A man dressed in old ass clothes ushering dead people,” you chirped, “An angel!”
The man looked like he was going to take you next before gritting out, “I’m an angel of death. You happy? I got to get this soul to the afterlife now. Bye.” You watched him grab the girl’s hand gently, crossing the rest of the road. He was kind of hot, you thought.
It was a long time before he would make his appearance again but sometimes you swore blue eyes and a matching coat would swirl in your dreams. Life went on. You were bored most of the time, researching about the afterlife for fun. Which didn’t attract many friends.
It was after senior prom. You were dazed on the side of the road, nose bloody and cracked. The boy who had taken you was crumpled behind the wheel— pinched between the car and a tree. He was drunk, so were you, and the other two were either still in the car or flung to the pavement.
Heavy boots crunched in front of your face. Your eyes almost crossed trying to focus on them. The man in blue’s familiar voice sighed, “I thought I was going to have to take you tonight.” Blearily you turned to look up at the twisted angel. He frowned down at you, face ashen.
“C-can you help me up?”
“Yes. But be quick, I don’t wish to rip the soul from your body.”
His icy touch yanked you upright and let go. The skin on your shoulder burned and tingled from the freezing temperature. You slurred, “Need’ta call…the police.” Utter panic and grief was beginning to fill your chest. You looked at him and whimpered, “Please help.”
He kneeled down to you and shook his head, a sad smile on his handsome face. The angel murmured, “That’s not my job. I can’t change fate.” Fat tears rolled down your cheeks as you sobbed, “B-but we didn’t mean to! I should’ve called someone, fuck.”
He wiped a tear away, droplet crystallizing, the burn from the cold was less intense on your alcohol flushed cheeks.
He sighed, “You’re a stupid kid. You’ll have to live with it, I’m sorry. The police are on their way.” Your head hung between your legs as you cried. Crickets and the sound of wind echoed around— like nothing ever occurred.
You could hear sirens in the distance. The man in blue stood up. In a raspy crack you asked, “Whas’ your name?” He stilled suddenly, shoulders tightening. The angel of death had the police lights flicker over his sharp cheeks while he said, “James,” his jaw worked over, “Bucky, call me Bucky.”
“Bucky,” you whispered to yourself, shaking even in the humid air of the night.
Life got better after that horrid night. You’d gone to therapy and many court-ordered classes into your freshman year of college. You were getting a degree in history and religion. If the angel of death that frequented your life would show up maybe you could get some answers and make a shit ton of money from it.
You honestly didn’t care if that fell through— something told you that life would likely be a short occurrence.
After your 21st birthday you groggily laid in your dark bedroom. With a groan you flipped over, head aching like hell. Maybe old Bucky would put you out of your misery. Flipping around a couple more times you paused.
Something was off.
You felt a horrid chill in the room and the feeling of someone watching you. Bolting upright with a wince you shouted in fear, “Motherfucker!” The blue angel himself was standing over your bed, an amused smirk on his face.
“What the hell are you doing here? Am I dying?”
He chuckled, leaning against your drawers, “The guy below you will be in about ten minutes. I noticed you were around and wanted to say hello.” You squinted at him in the low light and muttered, “Well hello to you, Bucky the herald of death.”
He grinned rakishly and hummed, “How have you been holding up? It dawned on me how nice it would be to have a living person to talk to. The other angels are boring.” With a grunt he pushed himself up to sit on the drawer.
“Well. I’ve been studying a lot. Last night was my twenty-first and I’m very hungover right now to be honest.” He laughed and inquired, “What’cha studying?”
You told him about the history and religion stuff, even hinting at him spilling the deets for your eventual book. To which he scoffed and flat out said no. After a pointed pause and Bucky checking his watch one more time he asked, “Can I see you again?”
You shrugged. Why not after all? He smiled like a giddy boy and bid goodbye with a salute. Flopping onto the pillows you laughed, “What the actual fuck?”
Bucky was true to his word, visiting quite often. Sometimes he was in a good mood. Other days the angel said he wanted company and nothing more. Spending eternity escorting dead people to the afterlife was not the most cheery affair. When he was in better spirits the man could be a chatterbox, telling stories of other angels and bantering with you on the mortal plane.
You’d grown very fond of him, almost too fond. His presence would grow closer and closer until Bucky was perched on your bed, long legs slung off the side. You’d been wearing warm clothes to combat the chill he emitted. Down deep the yearn for Bucky’s touch intensified by tenfold.
One night you had taken a guy home, a tipsy hook-up and nothing more. You were on your hands and knees, the man drunkenly rutting into your cunt. You almost bit your tongue off when Bucky’s icy blue eyes were directly in your line of sight. A shiver rolled down your spine, nipples peaking almost painfully.
You glared at him, tilting your head for the handsome angel to leave. He pouted and whined, “Really? This guy fucks like a clown.” On a disjointed thrust you gasped, “Uh-huh! Sure.” Bucky tilted his head and a devious smile flitted over his features. He hummed, “Does he feel any good? Bet I could do better than that. Maybe I should possess the idiot and fuck you like you need.”
A warbling whine exited your throat at Bucky’s heated words. You begged, “Oh fuck, please.” His sharp white teeth flashed before your blue angel of death disappeared. Then the drunk pawing stopped, hands gripping your waist tightly. Lips found your ear, cooing, “That’s much better. Shame about his dick size but we can make it work.”
You didn’t want to know what he was wielding if this fling’s already decent sized package wasn’t up to his standards. Bucky— well the flesh bag that was housing him— laved at your neck. You moaned, “He’s, ah, not gonna die, shit! Or anything?”
Bucky laughed, “No, possessing someone is different than me physically making contact. It’s all fucking weird,” he gave an experimental roll of his hips, “Enough questions. Can I fuck my favorite mortal now? I’ve got about an hour.”
You groaned as he pounded into your suddenly sopping cunt. Bucky nipped along the column of your neck, murmuring about ‘how pretty’ you were. In a quick motion he jerked you flush to his chest, laughing darkly. You yelped and writhed around his pulsing cock, overwhelmed with his attentions.
He felt up your tits, tweaking the swollen buds. You turned to the strangers face and imagined it was Bucky’s, pleading, “Kiss me, c’mon Buck, please?” His eyes softened and he took your mouth hotly, tongues immediately into play. His lips massaged your own while sharing eachother.
The lip lock grew messy and slick while he drove into your most sensitive spots. Bucky teased, “That feel good huh? Pretty baby gets a little fuck-dumb,” he took in your glassy eyes with awe, “Betcha’ didn’t know that, just needed someone to treat you right.” All you could do was whine and shiver, desperately licking against stranger’s lips.
He nuzzled into your hair while holding on your waist— hips snapping brutally into your pussy. You wailed in pleasure, meeting his hips in sharp slaps and sharp cries. Bucky ran his mouth to no avail. Just accelerating the breakneck pace to your orgasm.
Wracking with a shiver you whined, “You feel so fucking good, god, don’t stop!” He groaned against your lax lips, “I won’t, not until my baby cums on my cock.” One of the man’s hands snaked to your obscenely swollen clit, drawing circles around the flushed bud. You cried out again, almost jerking away from the intensity if it weren’t for the arm snug around your waist.
He didn’t relent, fingers lazily striking the sensitive nerves. Bucky smirked and teased meanly, hoarse whispers in your ear. Your belly was growing hot, hot, hot and tight. Every nerve ending felt alight from Bucky’s onslaught on your clit and weeping pussy. You whimpered softly, him cooing, “I know babydoll, I know, feels s’good ya’ don’t know up from down. Let it happen.”
When the inevitable coil broke your body seized as pathetic noises left your throat. Bucky cursed and moaned at the feeling of you squeezing his notcock. Big hands rubbed at your waist and the soft skin under your breasts. He lazily rolled his hips through your convulsing and crying, eventually pulling out and spilling on your ass with a broken cry.
You panted raggedly and leaned back against a hard chest. He chuckled, “You good sweetheart?” A dumb shake of your head was all you could manage in return. He stayed in the stranger’s body to hold you, a hand rubbing your hip warmly. His blue eyes scanned you, almost wistful in nature.
You looked up at him and asked, “Think we could keep this up,” you paused, “Whole possessing and having good sex thing?”
Bucky chuckled softly.
You chewed on your lip, nuzzling the stranger’s body, “They don’t remember any of this do they? Then maybe we shouldn’t.”
“It will be like a dream for them. Weird memory or so. So yeah, I think we can keep it up,” he smiled, “I keep my eye on you anyways— I’ll find the time. But I’ve gotta go now.” Before you could speak he was back out in his usual blue form, face pouty. Scrambling towards the edge of the bed you reached out, “A kiss?”
Bucky frowned, blue eyes mournful. He murmured, “Only when it’s your time sweetheart. Gotta use the others. Have a good night.”
You frowned and let him go, flopping back onto the bed with the idiot you’d brought home. He wasn’t your Bucky that’s for sure. More research on angels of death will be your next excursion.
In the meantime you were deep into school, researching, and church of all places. Then fucking Bucky in another man’s form all over the place. On the couch, shower, bathroom stalls, tables in so many different positions. Heavenly.
But the ache to be one with Bucky, James, was growing fervent and strong. It was only a snap until you fucked it up or something. Which you did.
This time you’d brought home some dumb Nordic exchange student named Thor. He had a massive cock and that’s what Bucky requested. On orgasm number three, face shoved into the pillows you cried out, “I love you! James, Bucky- fuck- I love you!”
Then he was gone. Thor was slumped over, snoring. But you’d never felt so alone. Of course he didn’t want you, just needed a fix in his dreary life. You cried silently, apologizing to the void.
A couple of weeks later you sat on a park bench reading Dante’s Inferno. It was sunny and nice, something you needed after the depression from Bucky’s rejection. You flipped a page, wind sifting your hair.
“I want you to myself and I can’t. So I bolted like a coward.”
You whipped to look at Bucky’s handsome face, unbidden tears rising. Your lip jutted as you glared, trying to not cry. Bucky’s brows were pinched and his jaw worked. He mumbled, “I love you. I love you. I love you,” the brunette blinked back tears, “I’m trying to find a way. I am. I’d give up immortality in a heartbeat.”
You pondered over his words, nails digging into your book. Taking a deep breath you grumbled, “Don’t do that to me again. I was so..lost.” He nodded in agony, fingers twitching to console you. Bucky hummed, “I’m talking with my boss soon, maybe you can join me.” He checked his watch with a huff.
You nodded slowly and asked, “Do you want me to walk with you to the site?”
A tear fell down his porcelain cheeks, “Please.”
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Here's a fanfic I wrote called The Cold, I've never done this type of writing before but I have been obsessed with Otis so I thought I should give it a try. If you read this, hmu I would love feedback, or suggestions, or just a heads-up in case it's better than I thought, and I should continue it!! Much love <33
It was cold when I first walked down that path, gravel and dirt under me making the blistered soles of my feet burn. Eventually, passing a fork in the road, I kept walking, trekking what felt like miles beyond where I first escaped, to find a woman…just standing. Holding a tiny umbrella over her head she kicked her feet and looked for possible rides home, before locking eyes with me. I felt like a deer in headlights, her beautiful blonde hair blowing in the wind of what was now a roaring downpour of rain, I took off what was left of my heels and walked over to her.
“Can you help me? I need help. Can you please help me?” I asked out of breath, watching her body language become more friendly with my second pleading.
“Well sure… But Jesus girl what the hell happened to you?” She looked me up and down, noticing my shivering body and pulling me closer to her under the umbrella. “Jeez you’re cold.. Here take this.” She took off her coat and put it over me.
“Thank you… I…” I was at a loss for words, so paralyzed from escaping that pink convertible from hell, unable to shake the image of the man in the back seat…. He was skinny, pale, much older than I was… he didn’t touch me much but he had this death glare he never took off me, like I was a piece of meat for him to tear apart, barely saying anything beyond yelling at the driver and muttering curses while tugging on my hair. As soon as he put his hand on me I ran, I jumped out of that car so fast I couldn't feel my ankle snap as I met the hard concrete below. And that’s how I got here, bloody, broken, I could barely get a word out of my mouth before me and the mystery woman were met with a car in the distance.
“Hold this-” She said, shoving the umbrella in my hands as she ran into the street in front of the car and smiled widely at the people inside, yelling at them to open the doors. “Me and my friend here need help! Please can we hitch a ride?” She said in an infantilized tone, trying to baby-talk them into letting us in. Eventually they opened the door, shoving the blonde haired woman in the front, and me, next to the guys' girlfriends in the back.
I gave them a weak smile before saying “We really appreciate the lift.”
“No problem, where you headed anyways?” Bill asked, looking at me through the rearview mirror.
“My house!” Baby chimed in, sounding awfully cheery. “We were going to have a sleepover and you know.. One thing led to another and our car got stolen! Some bitches took it and ditched us to rot on the side of the road… Until you got us…” She bit her lip and played with Bill's hair until he slapped it away. I felt myself tighten up at her lies, unsure whether to correct her or to go along with it, all I wanted was to be somewhere safe and this was my only ticket to just that.
“D’you know about Doctor Satan? Someone a few miles back told us about a tree-” The man in front of me asked in a more unserious tone compared to his friend.
“Oh leave them alone!” Bill’s girlfriend scoffed.
“Yeah I know that tree! It’s right by my house!” Baby said, shooting a soft gaze back at Jerry, before suddenly a pop of the tire stopped us in our tracks.
“Fucking hell!” Bill said before getting out of the car, baby and jerry soon followed. “Did you do what I asked before?” Bill said frustratedly, no response he repeated himself. “Did you pack the extra tire like I had asked?”
With an embarrassed sigh he muttered “No, I did not bring the extra tire. I inflated it but I forgot to put it back in the car.”
“For fucks sakes Jerry!” He said holding himself back from slapping his friend. “What do we do now?”
“My brother has a tow truck, he should be able to help us. I live not so far from here anyway I can go get him!” Baby said, bubbly as ever. “You, me, and my friend in the back can go to my house.” I weakly smiled at the baby when she made eye-contact, prompting me to get out of the car.
“I'll be right back.” I said to Denise and Mary before hopping out of the car. Baby held my wrist tightly and smiled.
“We’re going on an adventure! You, me, and glasses here are going to my house so we can get my brother to tow the car. Are you excited?” She beamed at me.
“S-sure.” I said as happily as I could, losing feeling in my feet as we walked to the house, leaving the others behind. Baby’s grip on my wrist moved to my hand, her warmth helped me keep composure on our little walk, finally letting go of me once we arrived at the driveway.
“You two wait here, I’ll be right back!” She smiled widely at me and Bill and ran off, coming back with that same wide grin scaring the ever living shit out of the two of us. “My brother just left, for now I say we go inside and warm up.” She grabbed my hand again and guided me inside.
Only in the house for a few seconds it felt claustrophobic, walls cluttered to the ceiling with wallpaper, and dirt. Garbage and other unnecessary goods scattered about the space aside for the clean-ish living room. It felt inviting when Baby was holding my hand, but as I really took in the space it gave me an unnerving feeling. It didnt help that there was a stench stinking up every inch of the house I couldn’t recognize- it was as if rotting meat was left out near a litter box. As i sat down I watched as Baby averted her attention on Bill, teasing and playing with him, leaving me closest to the tv.
“Baby you didn’t tell me we were having guests over!” A voice said excitedly, i turned around to find a woman who looked just like baby saunter over to me, sitting next to me on the couch. “Hello sweetheart, what’s your name?” She said, giving me a warm smile.
“(y/n)…that’s a really pretty blouse m’am.” I said faintly admiring how her nightgown clung to her, feather boa draping over her shoulders with unseen grace.
“Thank you darlin’, please, call me mama.” She said rubbing my shoulder. “Oh dear you’re shivering! Baby go get our guest a blanket and see if Tiny’s home yet!” Baby rolled her eyes, stepping away from the paralyzed Bill, before throwing a blanket at Mama and walking out the door again. “(y/n) is such a lovely name…what happened to your foot honey?” She said averting her gaze to my blistered and bruised feet.
“I uhm..” I stuttered unsure how to admit it. “I was riding my bike and fell off pretty bad, a car nearly ran me over.”
“Well don't go lying to my momma girl.” A husky voice said in the shadows. It was the man from before, the death glare… He walked towards us with a slow stride and plopped himself in the chair closest to us. “She had a big fumble down the road so me and Spaulding took her in our car… Being sympathetic y’know? And this bitch jumps out of the car when we’re going damn near 80 m/ph and runs away from us!” He said in an angered tone.
“Is that true?” Mama asked concerned.
“Yes…I’m sorry for lying to you Mama.” I said while unable to take my eyes off of him.
Mama simply gave me a hug and said. “No need to apologize, my son has no manners when it comes to meeting new people.” She laughs softly. “Otis, can you take (y/n) to Baby’s room? Help her get new clothes?” My eyes widened, body stiffening under her gentle embrace as Otis glared back at me with that same glare, slowly getting up.
“Sure thing.. C’mere momma, I dont bite.” He said pulling my shoulder off the couch and in front of him, going further into the halls of this maze of a home. Blood, dirt, and grime stuck to every inch of the house, each one looking older than the last Otis dragged me up the stairs and into the bathroom.
“I thought she said to take me to Baby’s room.” I said slightly confused. Before answering he forcefully held onto my ankle as i sat on the tub, wrapping a bandage on it.
“She says a lot of things, i just thought you’d prefer a proper clean up before we get you new clothes.” He said somewhat sarcastically, dragging me back to my feet once the bandages were done. “I dont like my new plaything all dirty or upset… You have no idea what you just got yourself into momma.” He gave a devilish grin and dragged me into his room, walls full of doodles and drawings. “Sit.” He pointed to a chair in the middle of his room, it had what could only be blood splattered all over it much like everything else in his room. Too scared to move I quickly sat. “Good girl. You know why we picked you up earlier?” He asked, circling around me, tying my wrists to the back of the chair tightly.
“Why?” I said squirming against the rope.
“Because you’re a pretty woman, aren't you? You look like you know a good time when it’s presented to you right?” He kneeled in front of me, tracing the shape of my breasts through my wet shirt with a knife. I couldn't answer. Pressing the knife into the fat of my left breast a little harder than before he repeated his question.
“Yes.. yes ow please stop.”
“Good…well you’ll be happy to know I love a good time. I’m a bone-ified freak as a matter of fact.” He chuckled softly rubbing my knees with his other hand. “You feel cold.” He leaned into my face, not like he was going to kiss me but to rather, admire me. Studying how my face flintched, how my eyes were tired, and how I reacted to his touch.
“Why are you doing this?” I said weakly, stopping myself from trying to undo his knot on the chair. ‘It was no use’ I thought, wrists burning with each small tug I maneuvered before.
“Like I said before… you’re a pretty woman. You said you liked a good time right?” I nodded frantically feeling a panic bubble in my stomach, feeling too weak to try and calm myself down. Sliding a hand up my thigh he whispered real close into my ear. “I got a way of making you warm momma…You want to hear what it is?” He pulled back dug his nails into my inner thigh, it felt like cat-claws digging into me like knives.
“Y…No.” I held myself back from saying yes, blurting out my self-correction and immediately regretting it as he used that same glare from before against me yet again. Stand up, he let go of my thigh and held onto my shoulders.
“No? You’re telling me you dragged your pretty little ass out of that storm, trembling like a god-damn leaf and you don't want to be warm?!” He shouted at me, flipping my chair to face the window. The storm was roaring louder than before, clearly flooding the streets as thunder boomed around us. “You’re lucky you’re pretty, I would’ve gutted your dumbass already.” He mumbled, breathing right next to my ear. “Pretty girls like you should know better than to not answer to a man like me. But I’m gonna take pity on you… just a little.” He kneeled in front of me again, both hands digging into my thighs. “That ain’t an excuse to try and escape. The only way you’ll get out of this room is to take a piss or die. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes.” I said, tears flooding my eyes as I stared at the storm.
“Look at me when i’m talking to you god dammit!” He pulled on a lock of my hair, making me yelp and nod frantically.
“I said..Yes.” I choked up, unable to contain the sobs i so desperately needed to get out. Suddenly, I felt a knock at the door. It was Baby.
“Otis! Momma wants you! We got guests and if you dont get your ass down-”
“Shut the fuck up! I got business to attend to!” He barked back, switching to a more attentive tone, slowly getting up from kneeling in front of me to standing up again. “Wipe those tears little momma, i’ll be back to make you real warm.” He gave a shit-eating grin flipping the chair around to face the door- teasing me. Teasing the idea of escape.
To be continued (?)
#otis b driftwood#otis driftwood x reader#bill moseley#house of 1000 corpses#baby firefly#captain spaulding#first fanfic
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