#even if youre not in danger of it its like a society that fucking demonizes not emoting right or having the right reactions and its like Hm
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therapy being sensationalized is the worst fucking shit ever bc you cant go onto ONE therapy video for youtube without it being like 'heres why these people dealing with these issues are gross unfeeling inhuman Things' and a bunch of self described superempaths agreeing with them in the comments
#its fucking exhausting the way theyre all about healing until the person has Bad Person Disease and theyre like actually you should be shot#do you people not realize how close any of you could be to becoming Person With Asshole Disease based on what others spin about you?#i use the capitalized words with heavy sarcasm btw#even if youre not in danger of it its like a society that fucking demonizes not emoting right or having the right reactions and its like Hm#where have i heard that before.#i refuse to accept fucking platitudes or support from somebody who is like oh youre fine but those Nasty Sociopaths-#like im autistic and i have the emotional range of a brick thanks to horrific abuse i have more in common with them than YOU#id be put on crystal empath TikTok and torn to shreds for not getting social cues right.
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the devil’s cup
pairing: demon!haechan x (f) reader
genre/warnings: smut, oral (f receiving), demons/underworld, mentions of death and self-destruction, unprotected sex/breeding (don’t be silly, wrap your willy!), edging, very slight degradation
summary: In a world where humans and demons are separated by earth and the unknown, you’re curious about the creatures that most mortal beings are too frightened to investigate. More specifically if they can please you sexually. As they say, curiosity killed the cat.
wc: 6.8k (this is the shortest fic I’ve done in a minute)
a/n: quick (and short) write! as always, feedback is appreciated!
There was a bit of division between the upper and underworld.
That said, that never prevented the interaction of humans and infernal spirits. It only limited them, though even with said inhibitions in place, forbidding could only go so far within mortal control.
Not everyone was god-fearing. Least of all demons.
Though you weren’t exactly fearless, you were curious to a fault. Human knowledge of the underworld was limited. You lived in a world where plenty of supernatural beings - werewolves, faes, vampires and the like - coexisted in an integrated society, but demons lived in an unexplored world of their own.
Which, obviously, was the underworld.
The church insisted it was for your own sake. You had practically never mentioned your intrigue to anyone, though that was chiefly because you were terrified to. The pastors were passionate in their sermons, deeming anyone who played with the devil a sinner beyond redemption and a betrayer of faith. You knew you’d be thrown scornful glances in an instant.
You weren’t the only curious one. There were plenty groups of people who conjectured about the underworld and its occupants. Which was not an option for you for many reasons. First of all, they teetered on extremism. Second, you would undoubtedly be banished from society for so much as breathing near them.
Your only option was your friend. Who happened to be supernatural himself.
Ten laughed. “Let me get this straight. You want to fuck around with the devil?”
You frowned. Though you definitely preferred the ridicule over the comtempt. He, however, wasn’t exactly in the place to mock you. “Come on, Ten. Didn’t you call on a succubus?”
“Correction - you want to fuck the devil.”
“Ten,” you whined.
Ten shook his head. This was hilarious, because you were completely serious. It was also somewhat worrying. Most humans that had toyed with the devil for too long never survived. “Babe, I’m a vampire. Have been for sixty-two years. I’m technically in my eighties. You, sweetheart, are a human. Incubi can kill mortals like you.”
No wonder he tended to act like a cranky grandpa. You folded your arms stubbornly.
The truth was that you were searching for a way to spice up your sex life and strangely enough, a demon sounded like exactly what you needed. You were desperate at this point. The men earth had provided for you were useless. You could count on both hands how many times you had given them a try and were ultimately unsatisfied. You were out of options.
“One time won’t hurt, right?” you asked, batting your lashes. “Please, Ten. I just want to try. I can only die if I do it continuously.”
Ten blew out a sigh. “Woman, you’re insane.”
You whined, “Pretty please? I’ll literally buy you those Starbucks drinks you like everyday for a month. I need this.”
Ten mulled the offer over. On one hand, this was not only dangerous, but deadly. There was a chance that he could risk losing you in the process. But on the other, you were a responsible adult woman. It wasn’t like you would be selling your soul. You’d simply be testing the waters. “Fine. I’ll help you, but you better only do this shit once. I’ve had to bury a friend before. I don’t wanna go through that hell again.”
You lept up excitedly and cheered, “Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you so much.”
“Whatever,” Ten said, rolling his eyes. “I’ll be back later with the stuff. And I’m taking it back after tonight.”
Frankly, you couldn’t care less. You knew your best friend was only trying to protect you, and you genuinely didn’t intend on disobeying. You were curious, not stupid. Nor did you have a death wish.
Ten reappeared later that night with the materials necessary to summon a demon. Technically, you could have done it without them, but that would’ve been a much more ineffective, chance-based approach. It also most likely would have taken way longer. According to Ten, the board had a ninety-percent success rate.
He had told you, “Unless you’re like, extremely unfuckable, it’ll work for sure.”
You snorted.
That was how you met Haechan.
Black smoke rose from the ground, wavering murkily with a ghastly noise until it dwindled fainter and fainter. You took a step or two back, holding your breath with curious fear as you waited for the mist to clear.
Once it did, the handsomest man you had ever seen materialized before you.
You audibly gasped. Frankly, you weren’t sure what you were expecting, but it wasn’t this. His dark hair was slicked back, forehead exposed to the breeze that temporarily coursed through your home, and he was tan-skinned. Like the heat of hell had graced his body.
His pretty lips curled into the utmost smuggest grin. “Aren’t I lucky? I could feel that you would be gorgeous.”
“You could feel it?” you repeated dumbly. In your defense, you were stunned.
The average idea of a demon was a grotesque blood-hungry monster and needless to say, this nameless boy didn’t fit the bill. Part of you was half certain that Ten was pranking you, firm in his decision that it was foolish for a human to engage with a demon. He seemed like a regular, everyday being. Except maybe not. Most men weren’t this beautiful. And his presence was inexplicably strong.
Haechan scoffed, “Yeah? How else do you think I got here? I could feel your energy. It was calling me.”
The room reeled. The air felt different, thicker. Your body lighter. There was an air of danger to this boy with a trace of something else that you were equally drawn to.
Energy. Was it possible that you could feel his energy too?
Given you were in a state of mental narcosis, more or less the effect of his aura, Haechan gleaned you wouldn’t respond and instead approached you. It felt like you were jolted awake when his warm skin pressed to yours, his lips and breath ticking your neck.
“Haechan,” the demon whispered, but it felt like the thrumming of the wind. “That’s the name I want you to say tonight.”
Heat wafted over you. You nodded, because you couldn’t say another word. As if an invisible hand was clasped around your throat.
Haechan coiled an arm around your waist, forcing your back flush against his chest. “Tell me what you want,” he purred. Your thighs were bare and he snagged the opportunity to grope them, free hand leisurely rising higher. For now, they landed squarely at your ass. “So I can help you.”
You swallowed hard. Part of you was afraid, but the other was enticed by the danger. It always had been. Your voice lacked complete confidence. “I… wanted something new. The men here aren’t adequate. I needed something else.”
“Oh?” Haechan cocked a brow and snickered. “Don’t worry about that tonight, baby. I’ll make you forget about everyone except me.”
For a while, you had been at war with yourself, dithering between your options. But Haechan had tempted you. Whatever fight you had abandoned you as he brought you to your bed.
Every alarm in your body was ringing, sirening to you that danger was near at hand, but the soft lulling of his voice abated your panic. The horns were blown, but you were too far gone to hear them.
Haechan lay you at your backside and you swayed like a leaf, throat parched dry when you glimpsed into his eyes. They were red with lust, dark as blood. “Don’t look so scared,” he reproached, but it was of little substance given the smidgen of a smirk you’d seen on his lips.
You were still tongue tied and at a loss for breath, never mind words.
Haechan’s touch wasn’t gentle in the slightest as he came to tear your clothes away, shredding them layer by layer. His fingers skimmed against your body and your skin scorched where he touched you.
Admittedly, it was somewhat true that you were frightened, but this was exactly what you needed to fill the empty chasm of excitement in your sex life. Between thrill and fear, the feeling that coursed through your veins was indistinguishable.
You had cycled through mortals and been left unimpressed each time. There was bad, and then there was decent. You wanted neither. You wanted someone to go above and beyond. They tended to do only enough to barely get you there. If even. You’d seen it all; you wanted mind-blowing.
You shivered at the cool sensation of the air against naked skin, but it was immediately negated by Haechan’s body heat. Still, it wasn’t enough. You whimpered, “Touch me.”
“Eager, aren’t we?” Haechan snickered. “Say please.”
You didn’t hesitate. “Please. I need you to touch me.”
Satisfied, Haechan snatched your panties with a final tear and skirted a hand between your thighs. They were already open and parted, welcoming him keenly.
It was only when you felt his slender fingers scissoring between your thighs did you notice how wet you were. The thought alone had been arousing. The sight of him even more. It was the weaving of those individual factors that had you gathering in his palms like water.
Haechan shook his head with mirth. “Something tells me that you don’t get wet like this too often. Do you, baby?”
The answer to that was so embarrassingly obvious that you wanted to shrink until nothing remained of you. Your cheeks stung. “No. Not really.” The more you thought about it, you couldn’t remember the last time you had been so aroused.
If ever.
“Aren’t you a little sinner,” Haechan said and chuckled to himself. Needless to say, he was amused. A pretty girl like you that could most likely have any guy she wanted calling on a demon because the men on earth can’t satisfy her? He was delighted. And almost humiliated on their behalf.
Like the cruel demon he was, he added, “It’s a little pathetic, don’t you think? Getting wet for me when you could easily find a human to fuck.”
You whined, but ironically pulsed around his fingers. Those words were as true as they were humiliating. His fingers coaxed into you with a loud, wet squelch.
Haechan eyed you with the intensity of a ravening werewolf. The likes of you were familiar - pretty girls that were too curious for their own good and went looking into entities where they had no business for pleasure. Never would you be the first or last, though regardless he had a job that he was more than glad to fulfill.
Pleasure played out on your face. That said, you wanted more. You had always considered that maybe you were the problem. Maybe you were the one at fault because you were too greedy, too insatiable. Enough was a word of little subtance to you.
But you noticed a sort of stark divergence here. With your previous conquests, you were unsatisfied because they took pleasuring you as if it were drudgery. This was more or less a job for Haechan, yet in spite of that, he seemed enlivened.
Boys came a dime a dozen. Pleasure like this? It was a luxury far beyond your worth.
“Fuck me,” you whispered. You were even willing to beg, if that was what it took.
“Mm, no. Not yet,” Haechan said, having a good chuckle at the look of incredulity on your face at your expense.
Never had you ever been turned down. It was always you that turned people away. Men that were bound to be disappointments in the sack lined up for you. They never hesitated to take advantage of your desperation.
Haechan curled his fingers, sending every wall of the room reeling. Your pupils dilated when he leaned in, firmly holding your jaw to make you meet his stare. “Human boys don't build you up, do they? They just take what they want and leave. I'm going to take my time with you, baby.”
You doubted anyone had ever uttered anything like that to you before.
His grip slackened. Not many words needed to be exchanged, the two of you content with the sounds of your soft moans and wet cunt filling the air.
The glimmer of mischief on Haechan’s face turned pensive. “Can’t decide how I want to fuck you. What about you, pretty thing - how do you want to be fucked?”
You felt your cheeks warm in response to his question, though you had a contemplative answer. Any additional eye contact would have landed you in an early grave, but you wanted him to take control. Too many times had you had to take the lead because you chased your own pleasure. You were in dire need of relaxation.
And if you were being honest, you'd let him have you any which way.
“From behind,” you replied, clinging to the pretense of indifference.
The mischief returned at the speed of light and Haechan taunted, “Scared to look me in the eyes?”
You blurted, “Can you read my mind?”
“Yes.”
Every functioning gear within you halted and your body slammed on the brakes. Made worse by the serious look on his face.
Then, Haechan erupted with laughter. “Sike.” You were relieved, though not amused. “I’m just fucking with you. I’m not psychic.”
As if to apologize for the massive scare he’d only just now given you, Haechan swept in and pressed a brief yet unnaturally hypnotic kiss to your lips.
You felt like you could die at any given moment, but strangely enough, you liked it.
It was game over when he interposed another finger between your walls, tall and slender. You were plagued by so many emotions all at once that you hardly realized how close you'd gotten in no time at all. Time expedited, but the minutes ticked slower.
You grabbed Haechan’s wrist, fighting for control of his movements, though not that he needed much guidance. It was an act of bad habit, you supposed, but Haechan smirked and let you do as you pleased. For now.
“Haechan,” you whimpered, reminded of the name you were instructed to say.
The man in question eyed you with a lustful awe. It was the first time you’d said his name and brother, was it a delightful noise. He hummed, “Close?”
You bobbed your head. No words needed to be said. The way your entire body responded to his touch as if it was owned by him was enough of an indication.
In a mere instant, you felt empty and desolate, warmth fading into crisp ice without warning. You whimpered, turning to look at the culprit, but met with only a smug smile.
No way in hell had this demon just edged you.
Haechan beat you to a word and explained, “I want you to cum on my dick. Is that alright, princess?”
“Please, hurry,” was your desperate response. You had no protest. You simply needed to feel him as soon as possible.
Haechan had a nice laugh at the sight of you trying to find his hands anew and fuck yourself against them, but retrieved them, bringing his fingers that were coated in your slick to his mouth and sucking them clean. Ironically, you tasted like heaven.
You moaned when Haechan kissed you, his saliva palliative to the ache of the wait and wanting. It took your mind off of the throbbing between your sensitive thighs while he shredded what remained of his clothes. You were so wrapped in his dark magic, a pawn in his devilish game, but you didn’t care. He could destroy you until you were no longer flesh and bones and you'd say, “Thank you.”
Haechan was ready with burning lust and he growled, “Hands and knees.”
You didn’t hesitate to scramble into position, as if he'd punish you for wasting a second of time. Every voice in your mind was subdued and you only listened to the thudding sound of your racing pulse. It screamed even louder the closer Haechan’s body came into yours.
A gasp tore out of you the moment you noticed his cock stretching you open, ceasing the long wait. It was accompanied by another hushed growl, Haechan’s hands finding purchase at your hips. He filled you nice and slow, the pace so agonizing that you were tempted to believe he was testing you for the sake of toying with you.
“Don’t tease. Please,” you begged. “I want you to fuck me - hard.”
Haechan cocked a brow, but made no protest. “Whatever my pretty girl wants.”
You fought for breath when every inch was encased between your warm and wet walls, pulsing around his thick cock. Haechan penetrated you with a hiss at how you swathed around him so tightly.
Your body came alive at the touch of the undead, responding to his body with voracity. Haechan had no intention of restraining himself, ramming his hips into yours vigorously. He set a brutal pace, enough to sate you and your unnatural urges. For now. Your flesh scorched with fever, broiling under his fingertips yet craving more of him, more of the singe. You were indescribably elated.
Haechan seized you to a bruising extent and braced his teeth into your shoulder, effectively smothering a noise. You let out a cry of pain and pleasure, warped together to create some inexplicable sensation.
“So goddamn tight,” Haechan hissed, giving your ass a smack or three. Every thwack sent you clamping even tighter. “You like it rough?”
Between a thread of moans, you whimpered, “Yes.” But the way he drove his cock into you - hurried and ruthless - bundled your head into the mattress, your cries smothered by the pillows.
Haechan latched onto your hair, letting out a hollow, breathy laugh when you moaned. You were so eager to take him, never shying away from his actions.
It was paranormal, like nothing you had ever felt before. You'd yet to discern the invisible shroud of mist that billowed in the air, the spine-chilling gale that swept over you and chaperoned his presence, but you loved it. It kept you on your toes and made you hold your breath. Something to this extent felt forbidden, like you were getting a taste of pleasure beyond human capacity. It was an ethereal and otherworldly type of pleasure.
You felt so light that you could topple over from one breath.
Haechan’s eyes lingered on the way your whole body tremored at the impact of his thrusts, your ass meeting his cock with a slap and your breasts bouncing underneath you. Your body was gradually beginning to be coated in bruises and scratches, remnants of him that would linger even after he was long gone.
You loved that he was rough, loved that he fucked you like there was no tomorrow without overdoing it. He only had one night to give you the best dick of your life and was successful so near in.
Many had tried, but many had failed to fuck you like this. You knew you would be sad to see him go.
“Oh my god,” you cried, your voice given an outfall for speech courtesy of the way Haechan lifted your head by your hair. You were melting into abyss.
Haechan tugged at it a little rougher and demanded, “Tell me you love this.”
“I love it. I love it so much,” you babbled. Your thoughts were revoked. Your body was on fire. You knew one thing and it was the feeling that lit you off and riled you up.
The demon boy smiled. He wasn’t psychic, but he knew how you felt without saying. It was in how your body responsed to his, submitting to his every move. Your body betrayed you, presenting all of your emotions on a silver platter.
Haechan discerned you were near your climax and leaned closer, teeth grazing over your shoulder when he growled, “You’re close.”
It wasn’t a question; you were close. That much was obvious. You could only bob your head, blabbering more hardly coherent sentences that he found amusing.
You fisted the pillows and sheets for dear life, clinging to whatever you possibly could to anchor yourself. You felt like you had been put together solely to be destroyed afresh. As if his intention was to shatter you piece by piece.
In that case, he was doing a damn good job.
If possible, Haechan’s pace became even more merciless. “Let go,” he coaxed surprisingly gently, strumming you to climax with his fingers at your clit. Your body one-hundred percent intended to obey him, unable to defy its urges.
You screamed with orgasm, burying your face into the pillows to smother your cries of pleasure. Tears welled in your eyes, rivulets trickling down your cheeks. Your body felt whole and empty all at once, overcome by an overwhelming sense of relief. Even after you came, you were still pulsing around his cock, eager to get him there.
“Cum,” you begged, still waiting for him. “Please?”
The desperacy in your voice practically finished Haechan then and there, and he grunted, “Fuck.” There was no way he could tell a pretty thing like you, “No.”
Haechan found a bruising grip on your ass to anchor himself and his cock twitched with release inside you, his mouth parting with a series of moans and growls. You whimpered when he filled you, painting your walls with warm cum. Only then did your spent body slacken, collapsing exhaustedly against the sheets.
Haechan flipped you on your back and kissed the corner of your lips. There was something abnormally soporific about the way he tasted, because your eyelids began to weigh more than your body altogether.
“That’s it, baby. Go to sleep,” Haechan whispered, lulling you to sleep with his gentle voice.
There was nothing to fight. Your body lost all strength when you climaxed, and you succumbed to sleep in a matter of mere seconds.
“Atta girl,” was the last thing you heard before pitch black darkness bled into your vision.
When you roused from your sheets in the morning, Haechan was - as expected - no longer there, but traces of last night remained. Your bed was a mess, but you were in shambles, hair tangled on your bed and your body stained with tears, scratches and bruises.
Humorously, though somewhat questionably, only none of his semen was there. You wondered if demons could get humans pregnant.
You were elated, but somewhat disappointed. From the beginning, you were aware that you couldn’t see him again, but after last night, you were desperate. There was no way in hell he could show you a good time to simply never see you again. It was unfair.
The sound of your front door being pounded mercilessly startled you and you jumped out of bed, scrambling to cover your bare body and then rushed to the door.
When you opened the front door, Ten awaited you on the other side.
“You look like hell,” commented Ten offhandedly. You were always in wonder at how vampires could roam in the daylight, but allegedly, it was courtesy of potions and spell work.
“I had a long night,” you deadpanned.
Ten chortled and stepped inside. “I’m sure.”
You shut the door behind the pair of you and led him to your bedroom where your sheets were a disheveled mess on your bed. Last night had left the board on the floor to be forgotten.
Disinterestedly, you plopped on your bed. There was a question billowing like fog in your brain and you feigned your most indifferent tone when you asked, “Will he want to come back?”
Ten thought nothing of your question and shrugged, leaning over to pick up the materials you'd abandoned. “Depends. Demons know these… arrangements get messy. Some care, some like messy. It's not rare. Just in case, I’ll have a witch friend of mine fix a spell to ward evil spirits off.”
“Oh,” you replied, playing innocent. But that wasn’t what you wanted. You dwelled over last night and the thought of Haechan coming back for seconds. You weren’t special, that you knew. Demons of his kind has a nonselect variety to choose from, but you knew only he could pleasure you like that again.
Like he was catching on, Ten added, “It’s not a good idea to give him a chance to get attached. Some demons are bitter and possessive. The moment they want you to be theirs, they’ll hurt you and anyone else who gets in their way in response to a perceived betrayal.”
His warning spooked you, but not by much. You assured Ten that you understood and would leave that night behind you. After all, with all the measures taken, it was out of your hands.
One night became several.
In your defense, you weren’t the one that summoned him. It was because of your energy. He always claimed he could feel you. You frequently laid brooding in your home, yearning for him to return.
And then, he appeared. You knew when Haechan was there and when he wasn't. It was his presence. You could feel it in your chest. You couldn’t explain it, but whenever he was in range, a gust of cool air would sweep over your shoulders and a thick gale would strike your lungs, rendering you breathless.
Haechan materialized in that same shroud of mist, snickering to himself when your startled figure trembled.
You gawked when you saw him in full glory. “How the hell…”
“Your friend isn’t the only one who knows a sorcerer,” Haechan grinned smugly. “I felt your yearning - did you miss me?”
Oh, did you. You had spent the past couple of weeks trying to get yourself off the way that he had, but to no avail. There was only one remedy for you and you were forbidden to have him.
“A little,” you admitted. Though you had a feeling he could see right through you, it was a lot easier to say compared to admitting you thought of how his hands felt on your body every time you touched yourself.
“I think you missed me a lot,” Haechan teased, stepping closer. Meanwhile, you were riveted in place, unable to move. You gasped when his hands browsed up your dress, targeting your damp panties. “Are you saying this isn’t for me?”
You tensed and whined, “Haechan.”
Haechan gave you a smile, the same devilish one he always wore. He slipped your panties to the side and brushed his slender fingers against your dampening cunt. “Tell me you missed me.”
“I missed you. I missed you a lot,” you confessed without hesitation. “I… I’ve been thinking about you all day.”
He cocked a brow and crammed a pair of fingers inside you. “Yeah? You been thinking about me fucking that tight little pussy?”
Your knees were bucking. You needed him more than you’d ever needed anything before in your life. “Please,” you cried. “Please, please…”
The demon silenced you with a kiss that made you feel so light, you almost tipped over. He caught you in his arms and carried you to your bedroom.
When you were finished, Haechan fell heaving at your side and groaned, “You’re always so goddamn tight.”
You giggled. “You love me.”
Like you had said some forbidden word, Haechan switched on a dime and gave you a fair warning. “That’s the snag, baby girl. I can’t love you.”
That you knew, but it stung to hear aloud. You were by no means in love with the demon you'd only fucked on two occasions, but hell, he seemed like the best option. There was a bit of venom in your tone when you responded, “But you fuck me.”
“Yes. Because that’s what I do. I have sex with you needy little humans and drain you to death of your energy. Then the next one comes along and the cycle repeats. I can’t love you because you’re going to die some day, babe. Even sooner the longer you mess around with me.”
You blinked. He was a hell of a lot more forthright than you expected. Haechan was going to fuck you within an inch of your life. Literally.
That was how the cycle began. Haechan informed you of a simpler way to summon him and he began to visit you more often, stealing your nights away. You never mentioned him to anyone. If Haechan didn’t kill you in time, Ten would undoubtedly burn you alive.
You loved spending nights with Haechan, and over time, those moments together bled into days and mornings. More often than not, you would talk the day away, discussing everything under the sun and moon.
Six years ago. Those events culminated in this later two-part dilemma you’d brought upon yourself.
Weeks turned into months. You were growing weaker. The venom was slowly killing you, contaminating your blood far beyond human reclaim.
Additionally, everything the two of you had said about loving each other had gone terribly south. The more you got to know Haechan, the deeper you fell. And watching you fall drastically ill under his influence tore an unfamiliar feeling from his cold heart - fear. Losing you cooled his already icy blood.
Haechan heaved a breath, trying to remain calm. The two of you knew that this would happened, but goddamn, he would have never predicted that he of all people would fall in love. It was almost laughable. “I can immortalize you, but there’s a catch.”
You eyed him expectantly. “Like what?”
“You’ll watch the people you love die,” Haechan said morosely. “Your entire life will fade with your mortality.”
You frowned. That was a given, but you loathed the thought of that day. No matter how far in the future it may have been. There were always immortal beings to befriend at your disposal, but the current mortal ones - your family - would pass on without you.
But even more, you loathed the thought of them having to bury you. You would take the pain in sacrifice if it meant they never had to feel the empty ache of lost.
“Okay.”
Haechan shot you a look. “Okay, as in what?”
With shaky hands, you blew out a breath and told him, “I’ll do it.”
Haechan interlaced your fingers between his and pulled you close. The last thing he wanted was to lose you, but he also wanted you to do this completely out of your own free will. “Are you sure? This isn’t some reversible shit. No take backs.”
“I would rather bury my family than have them bury me,” you whispered fiercely. It was all you had the strength to do. “I made this mess, now I have to fix it. I can’t let them be miserable over a stupid mistake I made. I won’t.”
Instead of recoiling from your slight outburst, Haechan held you even firmer. It was a sensitive spot for the both of you. There were available alternatives, none long-term. This was by far your safest option.
Death was not an option.
“If this is what you want,” Haechan said, like he was giving you one final chance to reconsider your choices. But you were firm in your decision. This was the price that you had to pay. “Everything will be okay. Baby, I swear.”
God, you wanted to believe him with everything you had, but you were terrified. For as long as you'd known him, Haechan had always been more calm and self-controlled than you ever were, but even now you could see cracks in his demeanor. He wanted to be strong for the both of you, knowing you would shatter the moment he did, but this had him rending at threat of rupture.
Haechan lowered himself to your height to be eye-level with you and asked, “Can you get dressed?”
You bobbed your head. You weren’t completely deprived of your vigor. Not yet, although you had been passing through the days on preservation potions and the like. They could sustain you temporarily, but not for very long.
The demon boy you loved brought you to a secluded area in the woods, timing your errand perfectly. Before dusk was preferable. Evil creatures lurked in the wilderness, preying on vulnerable humans like you. Not all were fond of humans and vice versa.
And you were already ailing.
There was a tiny cabin across a river, lying at its bank. According to Haechan, it was home of a wizard.
“Your friend’s a wizard?” you had asked.
Haechan nodded. “Basically. But Mark prefers being called a warlock. Apparently, wizard is an offensive term that’s only used in fairytales. I still call him Wiz, though.”
You gave him a tiny nod. Many if not most magical beings lived in areas isolated from humanity. There was long, unaccounted for history between the two races and you couldn’t blame them for any resentment.
But it also presented the fair chance that he wouldn’t want to help you.
Haechan opened the door to the cabin and you treaded behind him like he was safeguarding you. There was a man behind a cauldron that billowed with green smoke.
You took a glance around. The cabin was dim, sunlight filtering through the blinds of a single window upstairs. Candles and lanterns burned, scattered elsewhere. The warlock spared you not a glance, engrossed in his brewing, though you noticed a crystal ball on the table, reflecting a perfect view that overlooked the bridge.
It most likely had warned him someone was approaching.
Haechan put on his cheesiest smile and greeted, “Sup, Wiz. Been working out lately?”
Mark slammed on the brakes and bristled. “Hell no. Whatever you want - the answer is no.”
Your demon boyfriend frowned, walking beside his friend to give a slight nudge to his side. “C’mon, bestie. I didn’t even ask for anything.”
Mark didn’t waste a second. “I know. And every time you compliment me, it’s only because you want something.” Then, the warlock shifted his gaze and seemed to finally notice you. “Who’s the chick - new piece?”
Haechan rubbed his neck. “Yeah, about that…”
“Haechan, hell the fuck no,” Mark interjected as soon as he put the pieces together. “You know you have to talk to Johnny about that.”
“See, that’s the thing. Johnny will kill me. And I’m technically already dead,” Haechan joked, trying to ease the mood.
You swallowed like you could gorge all of your burdens with one gulp. Part of you was ready to accept that death was inevitable and tinkering with your fate was deadly. As a spirit from the underworld, maybe you could meet the boy you loved again, but you’d fade into a distant memory to everyone else you loved.
Mark removed his spectacles and massaged his temple before he sighed. “Do you love her?”
“Yes.” It was instant. He didn’t even need to consider it. That made you smile.
“Like, for real?” Mark pressed. Like he was in disbelief. “I can’t waste time and casting energy on a pretty girl you just want to keep around for a little longer.”
Patience slowly dimming, Haechan snapped, “When have I ever cared if they lived or died, Mark?”
You came to clutch his arm, and Haechan softened, switching on a dime. Much to Mark’s surprise. Even he couldn’t deny that you seemed to have an effect on Haechan - a grip that no else had.
Haechan took a deep breath. “Look, my bad. But she’s special. I don’t know how it happened, it just did. And it would be easier to do a cord-cutting spell and toss her away, but I don’t want that. I want her.”
A strained moment of silence passed before Mark finally groaned, “Fine.”
“So?”
“So, I’ll do the spell,” Mark said stubbornly.
It felt like a weight was lifted from your chest and you could breathe easier when those words left his mouth. You watched Haechan’s face twist with relief, and he whirled you into his arms, hauling you with a supernatural strength that made you squeal and giggle. “Fuck. I forgot you’re not yourself,” he said and placed you back on the ground.
You shook your head and smiled. Then, Haechan turned back to Mark with open arms and smirked. “Come here.”
Mark grimaced. “Absolutely not. I’m warning you. Come any closer and I’ll get Phantom.”
“Phantom?” you repeated, blinking.
Mark whistled, and suddenly you heard a low caw fill the air. Then, you saw a creature fly from the single window at the speed of light and finally come to a rest at Mark’s shoulder.
It was a raven.
“My familiar,” Mark explained proudly. “Every warlock - and witchtress - has one.”
Ignoring the way the raven - Phantom - was staring down your soul, you gave a quick nod and asked, “So, we’re really okay?”
“Yes. I’ll work on a spell for you as soon as possible,” Mark replied.
Haechan smiled and swept you into a kiss, then Phantom immediately began to caw as if she was trying to wake the dead.
Haechan snickered and put his arms between you both. She was very prone to attacking. “Ladies, ladies. No need to fight. There’s enough Haechan to go around.”
You snorted and rolled your eyes. But you were happy. You still had Haechan, and you always would. Nothing would come between you. Death or Phantom.
Five years ago.
Now, you were alive and well. And not only you, but someone else.
After hours on your feet, you had never been more relieved to sit down. Ten eventually came to accompany you, having a good laugh at the weariness prominent on your face at your expense.
“Tired?” he asked.
“Try exhausted. I’m ready to drop,” you drawled.
Ten laughed, then shook his head and smiled faintly. “Tell me how it’s been exactly four years and I still can’t believe I’m a godfather?”
“Please,” you chortled. “They’re growing up so fast. I can’t keep up.”
You had discovered the answer to a previous thought. Demons could get humans pregnant. As it turned out, you also had to confess to Ten that you’d been sleeping with Haechan for longer than he'd thought. After all, the evidence had been growing in your belly for nine months.
Not one child, but two.
Ten gave you a tiny nudge. “Haechan really did a number on you.”
Through the corner of your eye, you could see him approaching and joked, “Speak of the devil.”
Haechan plopped down beside you, head in your lap, and said, “I’ve never had to work for anything in my life before those two.”
You and Ten giggled. “Get off me, you big baby,” you said lightheartedly. “Who has them?”
“Your mother,” Haechan replied, not budging like a boulder.
Or so he thought. You were both caught off guard when your two four-year-old twins eagerly came running after you, refusing to give their mommy and daddy a break.
Ten came to the rescue and leapt up, exclaiming, “Who wants cake?”
As expected, your two tiny twins turned around as soon as they came, shouting, “Me!” Gratefully, you mouthed, “thank you” to Ten, who led the little army away to dessert.
Haechan climbed into the seat beside you, and said, “We made this.”
“We did,” you replied, beaming. “And I love every part of it. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
“Me neither,” Haechan said, pressing a kiss to your lips. Now that the coast was clear, a mischievous smile crept onto his lips. “So, I was thinking that once we put the kids to bed, we could have our own little party upstairs.”
God, that sounded like heaven to you right now. “Say no more.”
Haechan snickered and lifted you into his lap. You rested your head against his lap comfortably. “I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you, too,” you said, a smile tugging your lips.
Those three words summed up everything. There was so much you wanted to say. You wanted to tell him that you always wanted a family with him, that you wouldn’t have it any other way. That you knew in your heart that this was the way it was meant to be. But you settled for, I love you. And you settled because he already knew.
“As much as we fuck, we should have expected twins.”
Those words snapped you out of your train of thoughts and you stood to your feet. “Save it. We have a birthday party to celebrate.”
Haechan followed you, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Yes, ma’am. Mind if we go hit the dance floor in celebration?”
“Not at all,” you told him.
And it was easily the most magical moment of your life being twirled around in Haechan’s arms, the rest of your little family soon coming to join you both.
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Part 3 of feral mc but with Belphie being released from the attic. Just imagine Belphie trying to kill mc and they just bite him. Not even Barbatos could handle the child so I highly doubt Belphie could either lol.
Feral Child Mc (part three)
MC Gets Betrayed & Bombastically Side Eyed Their Way To Beating A Bitch.
A/N: I like my writing to be nothing short of silly goofy, i also wrote this at like 4am two weeks ago and was so surprised to see it in my drafts. Did i proof read it? No.
Enjoy anyways💕
Now, you have been a menace since you've arrived
Only truly unstoppable by Diavolo, Lucifer and Barbatos on a good day
Today
Was not one of those days
No
Not at all
You see
Late in the night after being very snuggly tucked in
And then duck taped to the bed
And then your pajamas stapled to the bed
And then tied to the bed
In their defense
Not a single brother has gotten a single decent night of sleep
Not since Mammon awoke one night to see your little face peeking out from the vents
You screamed at him and launched from the darkness, stealing his sun glasses before scrumbling deep into the walls
no one has ever heard Mammon scream so loudly
Needless to say they were pretty fucking done with your scrumbling
Besides, they tied Satan to the bed and look at him! A totally chill and normal member of society :D
Anyways you were built different and managed to escape
You had to check on your little friend in the attic after all, it had been a few days
Upon going in, you glared at eachother for exactly three minutes and fourteen seconds
Before he started the whole sweet act on you
"Awh hey, you can let me out now right? You can do that? Whose a good little human?"
Offense taken
You werent a dog
though you wont lie and say you havent growled back at Cerberus before...
No you know what
Who does this man think he is?
You are a child with 6 of the deadliest pacts in the world!
...
...
...
Wait a second
Who thought that was a good idea
Genuinely
You are feral
A monster
The other students at RAD cower before you
You made the Angel's cry
YOU CHOKED BARBATOS WITH A SHOE LACE
WHO IN THE 7 CIRCLES OF HELL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO MAKE A PACT WITH YOU OF ALL PEOPLE
well whatever it's not like this is gonna come back and bite you
But you werent gonna release the bitch from his kennel
Not without a price
Mammon would be so so proud of you!
It took a lot of back and forth, but he promised 12 firecrackers, a new plushie, and a trip to the candy store
Hell yea candy
Open up oh magic lock
Oh he fucking kicked you across the room
Well that's not fucking candy
Lying prick
So this fucking incel loser started ranting about something or other
To be honest you didnt care
In fact you decided he didnt get a monologue
You were pissed off
You freed him
Were you the embodiment of capitalism while doing so?
Maybe
But that doesnt mean he can just hit you
Like
You have such a cute face
He's just mad that you're the baby of the family now
And that thought gave you a great idea!!
"I'm telling Lucifer"
Would have been your final words
Had you not been
Well
You.
Next thing you know he's chasing you down the stairs, grabbing you and choking you out
Which
Not gonna lie
Was a bitch move
So you kicked him square in the jaw and started screaming, just like papa lucifer taught
Stranger danger kids
Dont release strange men from the attic in exchange for candy
It's not worth it and they are lying
So obviously you pissed off what's his name
You're pretty sure its bitch boy
Anyways so you pissed off bitch boy and he started trying to stab you with a chair leg
Which was like
So rude
And the others were like bro stop
Except more panicked you're pretty sure but you werent a crybaby bitch like this loser so you know
You had to go for the knees
You slid around him, kicked him in the back of the knees
This wasnt your first rodeo
Apparently
Because you climbed on the demonic cow and grabbed the horns man
You were holding on for dear life before you just bit into his head
Like
I dont think he even knew what to do at that point
You ruined his WHOLE SPEECH
THEN FOR SOME REASON YOU GOT MAD AT HIM
gee I wonder why
THEN HIS BROTHERS SHOWED UP
THIS WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE HOW IT WENT AT ALL
PRICK
Recounting this tale now, a few months later, you'd like to think that he was just being the most frfr brother out of everyone
You two had to be torn apart like a pair of summer popsicles
You were kicking and screaming
He was kicking and screaming
Mammon was kicking and screaming, somehow his leg got caught in between you two
It was a warzone
The hallway was destroyed
Multiple bedrooms? Just gone
The brothers?
So
So tired...
None of that fake shit
Deep down you know you would've won though
You still call him bitch boy💕
#obey me#obey me headcanons#obey me imagines#obey me scenarios#obey me barbatos#obey me diavolo#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me solomon#obey me asmodeus#obey me belphegor#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me beelzebub#obey me luke#obey me simeon#obey me feral mc
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Hi so wednesday x reader who is basically itadori who has sukuna inside of them and has already eaten 2 fingers hope its not too complicated
This was a whole lot of words and none of them were probably even what you wanted.
Your an absolute sweetheart who could do no wrong nor harm a fly. Sure you could seemingly outrun a fucking cheetah but other then that there wasn’t anything unusual about that anyone could make by staring at you.
Only until you point out the two occasions where you had swallowed two of the twenty fingers of an all powerful king of curses. That earned you a few unconvinced stares until a sharp tongued mouth and a demonic eye appeared in tandem just under your cheekbone, spouting curses and death threats towards each and every one of your friends. Fun.
The demonic bastard ruined your perfectly normal life and made you an outcast in your old school, which you were then bullied out of the entrance doors by the kids you went out of your way to save and then sent away to Nevermore by your parents who had grown deathly scared of the monster within you that threaten to re decorate the walls of your home with their blood, use their internal organs for decorations and finally utilise their hollowed out heads as lamp shades/candle holders.
Weems was notified by the most notable names of the potential danger you could unintentionally bring upon the school should the king of curses continue to use you in his hunt for the remainder of his fingers and retaining every ounce of his long forgone and mythologised power.
So with two of the twenty fingers haven been swallowed, you were already too much of a problem for Weems and Nevermore but she knew that if she left you out into the streets of Jericho and the king of curses happens to greet everyone with his own eyes, Nevermore would be finished indefinitely when word got out that she sent you away because you were too much a danger to human life to be allowed in. So much so the entire town of Jericho was slaughtered because it.
So in order to satiate her growing fear, Weems tasked the nightshades to keep tabs on you and make sure that your…demonic friends didn’t come out to play. However after the first week of no evidence of you being a massive danger to the school. The nightshades -minus Xavier and Ajax because they went out of their way to befriend you during this time- didn’t see what Weems was so worried about and left you be to do their own thing that they would’ve liked to have been doing in the first place.
So when the one time that you did loose control to the king, Ho boy he was no at all entertained by the so called secrete society that was meant to keep tabs on him. That when Ajax and Xavier were about to head down to the library the saw you or what they thought was you standing near the Poe statue; almost as though you heard them breathing you moved to look them in they eye and that’s when they begun to know why Weems was so afraid. The person staring back at them wasn’t you but the king of cursed himself.
“Shouldn’t have let your guard down Nightshades,” he spat venomously as he threw Kent at their feet to see that his pendant had been obliterated to pieces much like his face was, “this is your line of defence against threats? How pathetic, I shouldn’t have to be trying this hard to maintain my presence within this body but this punk is stronger then I originally thought them out to be.” The king spat as he felt your tugging at him getting stronger by the second as he felt his time quickly slip away.
So before he could allow you to take this moment away from him, the curse stared at the two frightened boys and heeded a them a grave warning. “I shall come back for blood, for this puny moron couldn’t ever hold me back like this forever because one day, oh-ho one day, I shall slaughter every man, woman, child and how many others in this school and in Jericho.”
Once you had regained control, Ajax and Xavier were quick to realises that the black tattoos on your body also faded away. Weems told them that you had only swallowed two fingers and they were already shitting themselves at what you/the king of curses could do if you swallowed just one more if you/him were already able to hand Kent his ass on a silver plater at just two fingers. Ajax dragged Kent to the nurses office whilst Xavier carried you back to your dorm which you didn’t have a roommate as for their safety more so then yours and camped outside your dorm until the next morning.
Ever since Ajax and Xavier have been the only two nightshades to keep an eye on you 24/7. So when Wednesday came to school. She noted that there was something odd about you that she just couldn’t put her finger on. At the comment a mouth and an eye appeared just under your cheek bone, glaring/snarling angrily at her. “What did you just say about me you freaky little meat bag?!” You slapped a hand on the mouth to shut the curse up and looked at the addams apologetically. “I’m so sorry it’s just that I ugh, it’s a stupid story really so I’ll cut you the embarrassing part and tell you that I’m now the host of a potentially powerful curse king.”
“Potentially?! You piece of shit, I AM POWERFUL! I am the fucking King of curses!” The mouth then reappeared on the back of your hand as it boldly shouts to the heavens of it’s title. “Shut the fuck up!” You hissed at the mouth as you threateningly brought out a some sour candy juice spray from your back pocket. “Don’t make me fucking use this on you again!” The curse hissed in distain like a cat but disappeared back into your skin.
“He really hates this stuff, one time I missed my mouth by a long shot and it sprayed into his eye and he wouldn’t stop screaming for hours on end.” You laughed at the memory of the powerful king of curses howling in pain over a misjudged projectile of sour candy spray. You secretly hoped you didn’t ruin anything but were already preparing to move away if you had, however once you had prepared to move elsewhere Wednesday asked, “where are you going?”
“I’m…leaving you be as I don’t want him to hurt you or anyone else in this school and I don’t if you’ve heard but, I’ve already lost control once and almost killed Kent during my blackout.” You told her truthfully but she still looked unfazed by all that you’ve just said. “And?” She asks and that was when you were beginning to worry about her mental state. “And I don’t want you to be nearby incase I do black out and he does come out again.”
Wednesday looked you over before saying with confidence, “you look in control to me, so I have nothing to fear until later events and even then I wouldn’t run away as I would merely find some way to detain you until you regain consciousness.”
“She’s most certainly an interesting one, worm. Then again it must be a trait that every Addams descendant must’ve acquired at birth or something.” The curse told you that night as you were brushing your teeth, “one of ‘em got this close to actually ending me.” “How close again was it?” You asked, the curse groaned “I said this close.” The eye under your cheek bone then began to bring it’s lid down until you could just barely make out the eyelashes that were tickling your skin before it burst back open again.
“Did you catch it this time you twerp?” The curse asked you through the mirror. “Yes I did the first time actually but you were stupid enough to believe me and do it again for a second time.” You snarked back as the curse groaned at how he got duped but you told him to have it in the morning as you were already tired enough as it was and went immediately to bed and fast asleep the moment your head hit the pillow.
The closer you got with Wednesday the more it seemed that the curse also noticing the attachment you were forming with her. So on the occasion the curse would threaten to take over and kill her last so that when you woke up, you’d see her dead body in your bloody arms. Yet you’d always bite back that he had every opportunity to make that moment a reality for you but never did, you went as far as to call him chicken shit but the curse would just offhandedly told you that it unfortunately wasn’t time yet for that.
So whilst you waited for ‘that time’ you and Wednesday began having dates in cemeteries, crypts could abandoned house and so on with the king of curses being a nuisance now and then by popping up now and then in hopes of ruining your moment but to his dismay you had the sour candy spray on hand and would always spray it into his big mouth, where it hit him in the back of his throat and for the rest of your date you were forced to listen to him scream and cough overtly loud in reverb within your consciousness all the while you tried to remain outwardly unaffected.
Wednesday knew that you/the king of curses were a dangerous game but she was always drawn to those types of games but she would always make sure that you wouldn’t be taken over so easily like before. She also knew that the while you were conscious, the king was also conscious but to a lesser extent. His power flowed through you at a weaker rate then it did within himself which meant that when you were fighting to regain control, not only were you reliant on your own willpower but you were also somewhat reliant on a small portion of him that didn’t seek to fight those he was obviously on a whole other level then.
The curse was growing ever more intrigued by Wednesday and sooner or later abstained from his usual barbs with her in favour of doing to towards the likes of Ajax or Xavier who, in his opinion, were more fun to to scare shitless then you or Wednesday seeing as you’ve grown numb to his threats or too cocky in your ability to pull yourself back into consciousness. So he merely watched from within you, make his barbs before leaving to scheme for the day where he would finally obtain full control without your pretty interferences. One day, you, Weems, the nightshades, Nevermore and Jericho will rue the day that you dared crossed paths with the king of curses for it shall be your last.
Thornhill was already planning ahead in helping the king curse within you by tracking down the remaining fingers, then soon she’ll be on to her second phase which is to giving you the fingers then thirdly, allowing the king of curses to be able to create pure unadulterated chaos.
#wednesday addams fanfic#wednesday addams x reader#wednesday x reader#Wednesday Addams imagines#Wednesday Addams imagine#Wednesday Addams fic#Wednesday Addams x you#Wednesday x you#Wednesday imagines#Wednesday imagine#Wednesday fanfic#Wednesday fic
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I think we should keep something in mind this Christmas/holiday season. As the Christian narrative floats around, the white swaddled newborn plastered on billboards, and the focus on what's "sacred" and "holy" circulating through churches around the western world...
The body being "sacred" has nothing to do with some fucked white European idea of chastity or purity. It has absolutely EVERYTHING to do with making sure people are able to feed themselves and their children, not be straight up poisoned by pollutants, or fetishized and exploited for profit. Holiness has nothing to do with being clean or looking your Sunday best.
It was never actually about "purity" or "virginity" or "cleanliness". If it was, why the hell would Jesus have been crucified? The real historical dude said stuff that pissed off people in power so much they fucking merked him. Nothing pisses off agrarian feudal lords or modern capitalists more than telling the masses that they aren't simply morally justified, but on the side of GOD when they steal medicine and food for their children. If you don't believe me, I highly recommend reading William Herzog's "Parables as subversive speech", read about what theologians actually think historical Jesus was talking about all those years ago. Whether you believe in God or not, think religion is a plague or pray a rosary every night, I think keeping this in mind is like super important.
Christianity becomes dangerous and, in the opinion of this demon girl, blasphemous when it is removed from the context of its social cause, when it's co-opted by those in power and disarmed of the radical rhetoric that it was born from originally. I think that's exactly what we see in broader society. I think that an entirely rational response to this is to equate all of Christianity or even all of religion with evil... But I think there's nuance here.
To be clear, I stand with the satanists who support the fight for separation in church and state by chastising the corrupt institutions who have become the opposite of what they claim to espouse. I stand with the atheists who keep the naive theologians in check, and offer peace to the people who have been ravaged by the monster modern Christianity is to so many. Don't stop doing what you're doing. If Jesus was standing here today he'd be standing with you. You're fighting modern day pherisees out here and I'm for it.
Now, this is not to say there aren't problematic things that were always present in the Christian religion, of course there are. And they're quite abundant. I think Christians need to be very aware of that as well. There's nuance there. What I'm calling for here is a realization that the religion of the oppressed is not the same as the religion of the oppressor, and that the religion of the oppressed, when not stripped of its merit and co-opted by systems of greed, can be a force for good. And when we use that lens to look at this bizarre spectacle we call "Christmas", we can learn some interesting stuff.
What I'm saying is, if you're trans, gay, whatever, for the love of God, literally, please LIVE. Listen to your friendly demon izalith. By existing as who you are, you are sacred. Don't let the people wearing robes and claiming to be on the sides of angels and "God" tell you who you can or can't love, or what you can or can't be. If there is a God out there, and he's with those punks, then he's no god. I spit on his name. Angels are overrated anyways... It's the demons, the poor person who steals from Walmart to feed themselves and their children, the prostitute who is proud of their job and the life they work hard to sustain, the fat trans person who goes to Christmas mass in goth makeup... It's those people who the religion was originally made for. It wasn't made for the rich, the white, the straight, the normative. It was made for us. For all those people who are downtrodden, cold this winter, unable to buy food, scared and tired. Fuck that shit they used to traumatize us and belittle us when growing up. It's all lies and venom anyways. If no one loves and accepts you, this demon will.
#christianity#counter-culture Christian#some demon theology#blasphemy is kewl#jesus would scoff at whatever the hell y'all been calling Christianity. especially if we're basing that off the greek orthodox jesus#queer theology#liberation theology#religious commentary#religious trauma#trans#Christmas#tw: religon
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~Seongtae x Jaha~
-Master Seongtae x Master jaha-
Warning: NSFW (thank me later) a bit of ahem..jacking off, cussing, a bit of sex, pleasing and venting, murder, a bit of comedy, very attractive men going at it. go wild and go crazy.
+Made by your favorite Rotmd blogger-Ocean+
____________________________________________
Jaha. The mad demon. Known to be one of the most dangerous martial artists across the wind of china. known to be ruthless to men that do terrible things without saying a word to the innocent and then just shit on them, expecting the innocent and the poor to eat their shit and then gulp it up like it's 2 day old soup from a dirty pot. jaha is known to have a heart for the innocent and the defenseless. even when they can't wield a blade correctly in battle or engage in hand to hand combat if a gamble has been lost to a fat bastard that takes from the poor and gives to the rich. whatever enemy takes from the poor. jaha will coat his black hare's tooth with their blood. and cut their body up into peices. he wouldn't stand for a man who uses people for no reason. this is just giving an example to the black sea wolves leader. You have commoners at your own living establishment but choose to drown yourself at your own wealth just by these people eating dirt for dinner that has probably been stepped on by dirty shoes. He is such an inspirational man. go from a errand boy.
Serving people their beverages and food to get spoken whatever people want to speak to you as.
To a badass master that doesn't give a flying fuck about fat men towards their women, masters to their town to take from the innocent, to the men that can kill off their own army to take down the main hero. the selfish kind. spread across their blood around the white steps of snow in hopes of getting their mind set right for what they are doing. Their ticket to heaven is revoked.
Their innocence is revoked from the moment they are born into the world of ancient China. you either live to be a normal citizen who is forced to live in a world that can kill you when a fight breaks out between the factions or live as a title to yourself. It's how things work, after all. If society as humans didn't have a formatted system to follow, then it's just pure chaos.
insanity is like an ecosystem. It can spread everywhere across the earth and be the scent of everyone's noses, and then the scent starts to become addictive as if it's being used as a drug. we all live around madness since it's supposed to be referenced as an ecosystem that is manifesting through everyone's minds in this sick reality we live.
jaha looked at his sword, "the black hare's tooth," customized to the leader of the black rabbit clan. that bastard is burning in hell, like william afton paying the price for committing child murder. his eyes scrolled up and down to its further appearance. Getting a kick out of the rabbit bastard's way of weaponry. his hand slowly flinged out his two fingers to caress his clear skin to the body of the sword. trying to see if this weapon is worth fighting off formidable enemies with weapons that are durable, powerful, and sturdy and able to even slice a brick wall in half by just one swing.
A presence swayed right in like a ghost. it's a timid knock. Is it hongshin? Is it the head maid of black rabbit? Who could it be to have a knock so light and so soft to make a door blush. its seongtae cha. a master swordsman and a potentially revoked manager of ilyang prefecture. formidable in wiping ass when he's being commanded to or maybe not. his smile expanded to jaha's glances of disturbance. "Hello jaha. what are you doing here?" jaha's hand flinched to grab the sword to keep his blood pool of eyes raving the details of the sword. "trying to look at my sword. I'm still waiting on my pole that the blacksmith clan is going to promise me in the future. I can predict that the black hare's tooth isn't going to be held in fighting the demonic cult. the number one enemy of murim." The golden artifact defining seongtae's eyes look up to the sword in property of jaha. he's right. Only a weapon he used for a lot of killing can't hold against every faction of murim.
"I see. Hopefully, I will be able to fight alongside you in the future. just in case you will be more a madman than what you are today. while I will be the light demon. it's to compliment your goal into becoming mad demon. while I shine a beam of light to the enemy of the factions. and then will be blinded by my beauty, for I have the power☆" he had a lot of confidence and self-love into speaking that so bluntly to the man that threw a glass across his face. jaha's voice snickered in comparison to his serious act to blind the enemies with his utmost beauty.
"Hopefully, they won't die of ugliness or have the overbearing weight of being gay." his breath trickled, turn shackled to his claim as his head almost went lollipop red to his snickering. but that insultive snickering seems like a laughter of enjoyment into teasing the great seongtae cha.
"You asshole. Your hair looks like the long black haired version of Medusa. watch me get stoned by black musk." his head was boiling to jaha openly, starting to lose his footing to the enemy of laughter when his head was turning red and it was boiling hot water just how angry he was. "I'm s-sorry. It's just that you would either say your name multiple times to powerful enemies or glamorize them with your beauty." his head banged itself on the table when his mouth spat out laughter. never had the mad demon be this so full of genuine laughter instead of laughing out of insanity.
"Fine! If you are going to insult me, then I will call arson upon your inn motherfucker. see how that feels." his laughter shut off like a lightswitch. he turned from kind to badass in a second. his glaze shook seongtae's bones to bring up his inn even though it's been burned down two times already. his fingers slipped to the waist of the sword like he's going to stab him at any second. "a-ayo chill, it's a j-joke. don't take it offensively, jaha."
"Take it back right now. don't target my inn." At a full flash of a fire blow out of candle. seongtae's back has been pushed to a wall as he's trapped in a position. he can't move at all. since seongtae's strength is nothing but a polygon to jaha's strength. 1- point for differences. their faces were so close to each other that even their eye colors started to gleam like a sunset. trivial red to red hot pink red (based on jaha's eye color) to seongtae's light gold eyes. his breath exhaled to clear off his attitude to their unexpected closeup. "I don't want to deal with more fuckers that think its ok to burn down my inn just because I was a errand boy. I do not want to deal with that anymore. I got truama, ok?" his head bopped up and down to his share of having truama about his inn. seongtae cha definitely understands him. But it's something about this that makes seongtae want to be close with him.
The crave to want to kiss his lips is rising up on his mind right now. Even jaha was being silent about it if their minds merged within each other. like a cosmic dying star colliding with a new one to regain some life force.
His legs gave it to the floor. but jaha acted quickly, for he grabbed a chunk of his royal silk only to just throw him back to his border of his lips. being so close as to completely emerge himself to his cunning attitude. "You must see that I'm threatening you as the mad demon. we are demons of our own. don't fuck with me seongtae." blinking to pat off some of his anger to him. but he did an action that would leave the great seongtae cha in a state of shock, surprise, and scarce undying lust for the virulent insanity of his general personality, only to be shattered by the definition of normality.
jaha's lips stuck himself against his, overbearing his taste in hopes of charisma sparking in the mind of the plum blossom pavilion manager. seongtae pressed himself on him like a sticker on free wet wood. just slowly pulling his self-worth and love into it as if jaha begged for it to be thrown in the fire. until his mouth begun to do a sound banging in the walls like a cave.
he struck a little moan as he tilted his head down to press his lips onto his more. he pushed his body up to dominate him in such a way that would even make a military brute shit their pants to handle in this. jaha's hand slowly slid down with his finger asserting possession to his skin. "Why is he being like this now?" seongtae thought in his head before he opened his eyes to see such a sight never to be seen in his life.
Only to see jaha completely hot with a shade of dark blush taming the skin of his face down to sit, his hair nearly done as his tie is hanging on for dear life support and his hand wanting to get access to the insides of his pants. and then he did.
sensually sliding his hand down to seongtae cha's short but lustrous cock wanting to crave human touch since he been doing that just now. the golden eyes of seongtae rolled back to his touch and just gave in to the mad demon's sensual unexpected craving. even a little droplet of pre-cum started to leak from its tip. the palm of jaha's hand adjusted to what his pleasure is going to do. jacking him off while his other hand closed up his way to break out of this.
This is a luxury to him. Especially getting jacked off by the same asshole that threw a table full of food at some men and stomped on them out of anger. pampering him with his seductively aggressive mood to his inn and teasing seongtae a bit. Isn't it funny to see such a serious man do this? his breathing turned shaky, his body is shaking too to jaha's sudden rapid hand movement to his sensitive cock. but he continued to kiss him much harder than before to shut up and take the estacy to rise.
That was...quick.
jaha quickly flings out his hand to see a white liquid ooze from the skin of his finger. it coated his hand a bit since it stinks. his fingers played with it to see how much it can be used for delectable things in his order. he discarded himself from their unbearably long make-out session as jaha's hair bounced and flinged back to his longing estacy to seongtae sudden lustful side to the mad demon "fuck me please. I want my self worth to be restored..please fuck me down.'' he glanced at his face like his confidence been bombed into flames but wants to be destroyed in a way that is....way different instead of indulging himself to his own riches to be happy about what he wants. if seongtae wants to be included in something. Then he has to. jaha tore the clothes into pieces.
to see his skim chest and his slim white banshee looking body to scan in the hell that is jaha's eyes. he rose his head down to lay small timid kisses on his abs to mark more of his possession on him. to let his subordinates know that the manager of ilyang is know his property. but he did something else.
he slowly slid his pants down, but as soon as he did that. He shoved him back just so that his face could be in the riverside of the wall and that he's forced to be an obedient pet and raise his ass up. jaha stuck his fat cock out to let its vibrant scent wither his nose to let him know that he's about to give his request granted. The stinky scent of his cum...their make-out session, jaha jacking him off.. this is a paradise to his mind. but he flinched when he felt it arrive to the insides of his anal. He didn't waste no time.
thrusting right in, seongtae's mouth bled moans.
Someone came right in the middle of this.
It's a random assassin with a knife balmed with the name: "Dark faction." On it.
He let go of seongtae in an odd manner when he took one glance at this random bastard that interrupted their time as technically a couple. now he's mad about it enough to have blood gushing through his veins violently. 2-point for pissing me off.
"....what should we do? I knew my sounds were gonna catch the wrong kind of attention." At an action. he flunged a random shattered glass at the guy, and he succeeded in stabbing him in the head. having a sprinkle of blood full in the halls of the golden dragon palace. but he's glad that nobody is in the palace to see this.
"Ah-"
"Jaha. Are you ok?" his chin raised up to jaha's ridiculous handsome face, touching the border of it. "We will deal with this later."
(Here you go, guys. man kinda feels like I got upgraded somehow. (Even though I feel like I'm constantly ignored by people ah-) but hope you enjoy it.)
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The ‘bastards are dangerous’ crowd is getting real vocal with the airing of HOTD which is unfortunate but i cant pretend to be surprised.
This stupid opinion is beyond maddening. I wont even be nice and say it is anything else besides and incredibly narrow minded opinion that you should be ashamed to have. I see a lot of people who want so bad to say they are progressive echoing this opinion which is laughable. Let me be clear:
You aren’t some paragon of progressive opinions if you say shit like this.
You are perpetuating an incredible fucked up system by doing so. Bastards are not bad or dangerous people they are normal people, i know surprise. But to help keep certain bloodlines in power and to help keep this system going they created this hate and fear for bastards (Among other groups). Which you are now validating by saying such stupid shit.
You are literally falling into the same trap your favorites did by demonizing these characters for being bastards. But actually its so much worse because you are literally reading this book that ACTIVELY criticizes the way bastards are treated within society. You should have the ability to read this book, see the very clear theme and NOT go ‘Actually maybe these people are right for oppressing bastards’.
And if you cant do that much i think its time for you to get off the internet and read some my little pony books or whatever.
#asoiaf#got#asoif/got#hotd#hey babes your nasty ass opinions are classist#leave those poor kids alone you freaks#‘have you see what happens when bastards are treated with basic human decency?? they steal trueborns things >:(‘#or whatever those morons say#house of the dragon#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire
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cilla my beloved not to bother you in the asks again BUT i realized i’ve never seen your LOK thoughts & i’d love to know them! (i just saw ur tags & u mentioned the animated movie probably wouldn’t be any better than lok - agreed - so i assume you’ve seen it, but if u haven’t then feel free to ignore this!)
have a great day my bestie!!
bestie you literally cannot bother me in the asks i don't think it's possible. i love seeing you pop up in them! it makes me so happy <3
if i'm being perfectly honest, i've only seen 3 or 4 episodes of lok, but i do have a vague understanding of the plot and it's such a mess??? some of these things i say could very well be misinformed, so don't hesitate to correct me lol.
honestly i think korra herself is kinda cool. she reminds me a lot of katara tbh because she wants to fight and she's really good at it. her design is cute and i do like her shorter hair as well. i think her little gang is also pretty fun and they all had some good potential. it's also never going to not be funny that korra and asami both date mako and then decide that dating each other is better. also bolin seems like he's a cute little dorky guy, which i whole-heartedly support. they all deserved better characterizations but the overall concepts weren't bad at all.
something about korra that really bothers me is that energybending isn't exclusive to the avatar. it seems pretty dangerous for the average person to use, so i wish that it had just stayed as something the avatar could do to maintain peace when absolutely necessary. it just feels wrong to take a core part of someone's identity. kind of reminds me vaguely of the way our restraints work at the hospital i work at. we consider chemical restraints to be much more severe and intense than like literally tying someone down to the bed because takes their identity and very being away from them. we have some pretty nasty patients here in america and i have never seen us use chemical restraints and my unit has some batshit people. so yeah, something about that whole thing rubs me the wrong way. i think taking away ozai's bending was valid because he had abused it, but that conclusion was far too easy for aang to come to. it is not something that should be taken lightly.
i also hate they solve the airbender crisis by just "now everyone bends" because it just kind of fuels this idea that if you don't have an exceptional skill, you're not as good as other people. like nonbenders have their strengths too??? getting rid of them does not solve the problem, it will only create new weaknesses. becoming too reliant on something that can be taken away is dangerous. we want a functioning society, not a building on the edge of a cliff that will crumble if one little stone chips off.
one of the worst things about korra is how they treat bloodbending though. do you have any idea how fucking useful that could be??? literally life saving. so many zutara fics under like 100k handle bloodbending better than a 4 season show and that's just ridiculous. katara should have been able to hone the skill and find its weaknesses and strengths. it's honestly very ignorant and just shows that they have a very poor understanding of the importance of blood in the body, which i could excuse if they didn't also demonize the skill and treat it as pure evil. i swear part of the point of the oringial show is that no form of bending is inherently good or evil and then they do that??? they don't even have a proper understanding of their own themes.
i don't think i really need to mention that the show is just full of blatant sexism towards katara doesn't get a statute, autonomy, accomplishments, etc. but that happens to all the women??? like where tf is suki??? you're telling me this girl that hijacked an airship and just vanished off the face of the earth??? yeah, i don't think so.
also yue??? she's badass of her own accord--and this a bit of a tangent but yue is a badass in a feminine way. like katara and suki are both feminine and badass, but they're badass bc they'll beat you up in the street if you're out of line. yue is badass in the sense that she is endlessly serene and patient and can calmly take you down without a single rude word. she will not be a pushover even tho she is kind and she is understanding, yet stern with her judgements. she is so cool snd it literally does not make any kind of sense that she is not mentioned or given a statue or any kind of acknowledgment. its literally so ridiculous and infuriating.
toph is treated slightly better, but is still a bad mom and everything surrounding her is just a mess. the fact that the stupid cabbage guy (sorry i don't really like him that much lol) gets his own statue makes my blood boil. like i know it's supposed to be a joke, but it's just a slap in the face because none of our beloved female protagonists get the same respect. it's disgusting.
i really don't even have the strength to get into kata/ang and their children and the damaged relationships and ignored cultural values and all of that, but just know that it's absolutely horrifying that katara had to give so much of the culture and identity she was proud of up for a man. no one should ever have to give up a piece of their identity for their partner.
anyways thanks for the ask bestie <3 you're welcome to drop in anytime i really do love hearing from youuu!!
#anti kataang#anti bryke#lok is a bit of a mess#the writing isn't great tbh#like i just... no#katara deserved better#so did suki#and toph#and sokka#i forgot about him for a sec but he does too#and yue#everyone does really#even aang#he didn't need to be a bad father#but here we are
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"I suppose i love this life, in spite of my clenched fist.”-Andrea Gibson
Amira is so smart and badass and I'm love her😍😍😍
I am terrified for the magical blackouts :)
Poor Rafe kdhdkdjdk, he wanted to keep it a secret and now everyone but Anjali knows 😂
“I think we’ve been taking warlocks for granted,” LOUDER FOR EVERYONE!!!
No attacks since David went to the Silent City is DEFINITELY not a good sign....
Mundanes are not to be fucked with bc we are scarier than demons, and that's not a compliment....
Kyle and Victoria getting married?!?! Really?? Right in front of my salad??
It was all very confusing. I feel her on a feel level...
Amira and Selena's friendship>>>>>
I NEED to know more about Kamran!! Plis I'm begging!!!
But then she had healed slowly.
She remembered how it wasn’t easy. She remembered how her family had been with her every step of the way.
I say go off girl!!! You've hot this shit and your family has your back😎
Amira is an AMAZING centurion!!! With her and Gigi, shit is about the get real!!!
“You have to find the time to do your own shit or it will never get done otherwise.” This applies to everything actually
Mama had told Gigi that there was nothing and no one more dangerous than a man who refused to admit he was wrong. So, yeah. Screw him.
She is the only valid one😎😎
Amira and Selena, Gigi and Camilla... I'm being blessed with amazing friendships🥺🥺
AHHH LOVEHOLLOW!! MY UNPROBLEMATIC FAVES😍😍 THEY RAE THE CUTEST ISTG-
It's finally coming together!!!!
Some people were born to use magic.
David knew Max was one of them.
He would never ask Max to give it up for him or for anyone else.
I just KNOW this is foreshadowing!!! I feel it!!!
A girl. A girl who wanted to hurt David.
A man. A man who had hurt David badly.
I am ready to commit murder 🔪🙂
But his necklace started to pulse faintly.
No.
No.
No!
“No!” David yelled. “No! Go away! Leave me alone! Please!”
Fuck!! It's also something demonic, this is NOT good at all!!!
I am once again grateful for Magnus Bane's existence!!!
He knows about the dark prince!!! I read some theory about it being Lucifer and now I am fearing for their lives!!! 😭
Magnus can't under any circumstances lose his magic, or I will kill everyone in this room and then myself 🔪
David shook his head. “I felt…I felt I don’t know how to explain it, um-” Free? Unrestrained? Reckless? Brave? I...am still fearing for him, don't get me wrong, I am all here for feral David, but this can go south...
Chopin in its little dog bed. Chopin in its little dog bed. Chopin in its little dog bed. Chopi-
“It wasn’t a ghost or a demon. Someone has been intentionally poisoning you.” Maybe the name starts with M and ends with alloy... Just saying... Although that was an intelligent plan, damnit!
He knew if she came inside his house, she wouldn’t be able to do that. They had tested it after all. I don't understand this and I feel it's so important 😭
Rafael had tried to do something good and had monumentally fucked everything up. DON'T BLAME YOURSELF!! I mean it's so sexy of him to take responsibility of this plan, but still!! I don't want him to suffer 😭
Rafa and Mila🥺🥺🥺
The shadow world needed magic. It would fall apart without it – that much very clear. Warlocks and magic are the backbone of society huh?
Rafael be like: yeah the bride was beautiful, I wonder how beautiful Anjali would look like in a wedding dress😍
Anjali took a deep breath. “I don’t know. But we’ll have to figure something out."
“Then we will,” Rafael promised. “We always do."
She pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I know."
What is better than a couple of hot, badass people that get shit done??💙💙
All the fucking scene with Marcus!!! Omfg that was INTENSE!!!
He didn’t even deny it. “I have to make people see." EXCUSE ME SIR, WTF????
He knows. He knows everything about us. There is no scarier villain than the one that knows a little too much of the characters...
Don’t fear the ignorant people, Rafe, the man had said. Fear the arrogant ones. Alec speaking FACTS AND WISDOM as usual I see😎
Anjali grabbed Rafael by the arm and pulled him back. His hand immediately went around her waist and pushed her behind him.
Rafael: I will protect you❤️
Anjali: No, you🔪❤️
Anjali shook her head. “We’re not those people, Rafael.” I wouldn't actually mind, morals out of the window if it means protecting them🥰
Rafael chuckled and laced her fingers with his. “I wouldn’t have let it happen.” *crying softly* they are so beautiful I can't😭
He looked at her.
He smiled.
She smiled back.
It seemed enough.
IT IS ENOUGH!!! FORGET THE 8 PAGE ESSAY!!!
On one side HOLY SHIT YESS NICOLAS THORN IS COMING!!!
On another: really???? He was so close😭😭
Your reaction made me realize that LBAF has a lot of 'women support women' and girlboss friendships and I AM FUCKING HERE FOR IT BRO.
Like it wasn't even intentional lmao. I just like it when women >>>
SEE YOU SOON x
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Heart’s Choice - Chapter 34
*Warning Adult Content*
Carlos
"Can't we talk about this?" I ask, apparently having reached the 'bargaining stage' of the hostage experience.
Ignoring my question, Rafael hauls me from the back of the van as Rexi hops from the driver's seat and slams the door.
"It doesn't have to go down this way," I say, trying to sound reasonable and not as if I'm begging for my life.
"You know how dangerous this shit can be. One misstep and it can literally go to hell. Why risk it? Besides, the cops are onto you. Skip town; take me with you. We'll work together and no one has to die."
I can only hope this last part is true and that John, at least, can use his Dracula skills and find me in time.
Unfortunately, Rexi seems unimpressed as she comes around the side of the van and pulls a small black duffle bag from under the front passenger seat.
We're parked along a utility access road, with a bramble-choked canal on one side and a chain-link fence on the other.
"You think we're stupid?" Rexi slings the bag over her shoulder and stands in front of me.
"Yeah, cutting the timeline short is risky but not as risky as missing this opportunity altogether. Too many people have died already for us to waste our chance. If it makes you feel any better, it's nothing personal, Carlito."
She pats the side of my face as she walks past and beckons to Rafael.
"Come on. Get him inside."
The nickname reminds me of my aunt.
Unfortunately, so does being forced to serve as a host during a ritual of demonic exorcism but I'd still give just about anything to see Toni right now.
Fuck... I'd give just about anything to see 'anyone' but judging from the fact 'Rex and Rafi' aren't bothering to keep their voices down, we're alone.
With one hand tight on my arm and the other holding the gun, Rafael walks me towards the fence, where Rexi pulls aside a section that appears to have been pre-cut for access.
On the other side, I can barely make out a weedy parking lot and the back of an old building.
Even in the dark, though, I recognize the abandoned theater near the edge of town.
I know about it thanks to one of my regular customers at the garage.
She belongs to the local historical society and instead of leaving her vehicle for me to work on in peace, she likes to hang around and watch.
To pass the time, she tells me things I'd almost rather go deaf than hear about, like the scandalous capers of her fellow bridge club members, how her most recent colonoscopy went and of course the daring endeavors of the Spring Lakes Historical Society.
This theater came up a lot.
It was one of the last small places to go under when the big multiplex moved in and the historical society bought it in the hopes of preserving the building, which is over a century old.
They intended to rent it out to performing arts groups and schools or some shit like that, until they found out there was lead in the paint and asbestos in the walls, after which its doors shut for good.
The surrounding area is as abandoned as the theater, home to a partly defunct rail depot, an empty lot, an old postal building and some county offices, which go dark and silent as a graveyard at five p.m. on the dot.
At this time of night, I might as well be in space for all the people who would hear me scream.
Giving me a shove, Rafael nods at the gap in the fence.
"Through. And don't try anything or I'll break your fucking legs."
Shaking him off, I duck through the opening.
As Rafael's jacket snags on the snipped links and he stops to untangle himself, I briefly consider making a break for it.
They're planning to kill me, anyway... at least I'd have a say in how.
My courage fails me though and I stand like an obedient idiot as Rafael makes it through and re-establishes his grip on my arm... as if I've any place to run now, unless I want to play 'ring around the building' within the confines of the fence.
Rexi comes last, letting the piece of fence fall back into place with a rattle and as Rafael drags me along towards a set of concrete steps leading up to the theater's back door, she extracts a set of keys from her duffel and takes the lead.
"So, Lucille was a member, too, wasn't she?" I say, eying the set of keys while Rexi fumbles for the right one in the dark.
"I remember now. Barbara thought she was a bitch. Didn't like her much."
"What are you talking about?" Rafael mutters, shifting impatiently as Rexi tries a key, fails to open the door and tries another.
"Hurry up with that, Rex."
I realize he's nervous as I continue my ramble.
"The historical society. Lucille was a member. That's how you have the keys."
"Should have the keys," Rexi murmurs, trying yet another.
"Fuck. Why are there so damn many?"
"'Cause the stupid bitch keep 'em all on one ring," Rafael says.
"Like, all the keys to everything. She said it was labeled."
"Well, I can't fuckin' read in the fuckin' dark, Raf," Rexi snaps, turning and thrusting the keys at him.
"You try. We're wasting time."
"You're wasting time," Rafael grumbles, handing her the gun and taking her place.
He pulls out his cell-phone and uses the light to examine the tiny label on the head of each key.
"If you got the keys, why cut the fence? Why not just unlock the gate?" I ask.
They're both on edge and maybe if I can keep them talking, their sibling rivalry will give me an opportunity or at least stall them and give John a better chance of finding me in time.
"Because the third ritual requires preparation," Rafael says distractedly.
"Couple weeks of it. There are security cams facing the street. Just one on the front of this building but more on the places opposite. It was easier to go around back."
Rexi laughs derisively.
"Keep telling yourself that. If we'd gone with my plan and pretended to be contractors, we could have performed all three rituals here and Lucy could still be alive.
"Contractors do actual work, Rex," Rafael returns, having found the correct key and struggling to open the door.
"Besides, nobody's nosier than a bunch of old biddies with nothing better to do with their time than attend... historical society meetings. Someone would have noticed and come... poking around."
He grunts as he finally gets the door open, yanking it ajar on rusted hinges.
In the effort, he drops the keys.
They land with a dull jangle and he swears and bends down to pick them up.
The keys slide away from his reach as if kicked by an invisible foot and as my breath fogs in a suddenly chilled pocket of air, I realize I'm not alone after all. Kyle.
"What the fuck?" Rafael reaches for the keys again, in that split second, my body takes over where my rational brain failed me and I take the chance and kick him in the head.
With a howl of pain, he topples to the side, clutching his face.
At the same time, I shove Rexi almost by accident, off balance from the kick but I take her by surprise and she falls against the rusty rail.
She goes over, dropping the short distance to the ground and landing with a thud.
Unfortunately, she never let go of the gun and now another decision freezes me, go for the weapon or run.
Rexi makes the choice for me when a bullet sparks off the metal door an inch from my head.
She recovered fast.
Rafael isn't down for the count either, despite the blood pouring from his nose and makes a grab for my leg.
I dance back a step as I would from a striking snake and then... astounding myself more than anyone... stomp hard on his arm.
He yowls like a scalded cat and curls in on himself, cradling the limb to his chest and I bolt past him and into the theater as another bullet narrowly misses me.
"Stop shooting, you stupid cunt," Rafael screams, pain making his voice shrill.
"We need him alive."
"Not for long we don't," Rexi replies coldly.
I yank the door shut and fumble blindly for a lock but it's got one of those push bars instead of a handle on this side and I can't find a deadbolt.
Thankfully, it's one of those doors that locks automatically when closed and I hear Rexi swear on the other side.
Still, they've got the key and it won't take them long to get it open again.
I've bought myself thirty seconds, at most.
Backing away from it, I blink in the nearly complete darkness of the theater, shaking with adrenaline and with panic burning my chest.
"Kyle?" I whisper. "A little help, buddy?"
A flicker of light catches the corner of my eye and I turn.
My vision, already adapted to the night outside, adjusts a little further, allowing me a dim glimpse of the building's interior.
The door through which I'd come is located at the bottom of the auditorium, which is bigger than most modern theaters and probably sat several hundred people at a time.
Built in the days when it was fifty-fifty whether there'd be a film or a live performance showing on a Friday night, there's an old wooden stage in front of the movie screen.
The seats have been ripped out but the rows of skeletal metal frames remain, aligned in three columns ascending on a gentle slope above the stage, on which I see the source of the light in a single, flickering candle.
Jogging towards it, I inhale dusty air and cough, praying I live long enough to worry whether or not I'm breathing asbestos.
I mount the side steps to the stage and stop in my tracks.
The polished dark planks, worn smooth by decades of feet treading the boards, are covered by a huge, incredibly complex seal... circles within circles, cut by intersecting lines that form many-pointed stars, with arcane symbols in the spaces the shapes form.
Candles ring the seal, placed at the points of a many-armed star but only one is lit.
Rafael wasn't kidding about preparations... this must have taken weeks to complete and I see now why they chose the theater.
Finding a place for a seal this big, where it wouldn't be discovered or disturbed by people, animals or the elements, couldn't have been easy.
A chill spreads through my body like poison in my blood as I study it.
It's a real gate seal... one that opens a portal to another realm and now the Morellis' crazy plan makes sense.
They're not just planning to exorcize the demon... they're planning to literally send it and me with it... to hell.
Or a hell. Somewhere unpleasant, for sure.
I wouldn't bet my soul on tropical beaches and beautiful men bringing me free drinks for eternity, anyway.
The door screeches open, protesting on its rusty hinges and Rex and Rafi enter, Rafi with his outer shirt bunched against his bleeding nose.
They spot me immediately, thanks to the candle and Rexi raises the gun.
"Rex, no," Rafael grabs her arm and yanks it down.
"The seal."
I look down at the intricate design at my feet and realize what he means.
Even if they cleaned it, one drop of blood across the wrong line could mean disaster.
I move around to the top of the seal, where the single candle burns, thinking I understand why Kyle drew me to it and pick it up.
There's a good pool of melted wax around the wick and wax will take even more time to clean than blood.
"Don't come any closer," I call, holding the candle aloft.
"Or I'll ruin it."
"Ruin it and we'll kill you," Rexi returns.
"This is a lose-lose situation for you. Just give up."
I shake my head.
"At least this way, you lose, too."
"Fine."
"Rex, no," Rafael lunges for her but not before she gets off a shot.
The bullet strikes my left shoulder and I stagger back a pace.
The candle flies through the air and lands in the center of the seal, rolling in a circle.
Wax splatters everywhere.
I fall to my knees, Rafael and Rexi's shouts a distant ringing in my ears, while another voice comes through loud and clear.
"Mr. Martinez?"
Raising my eyes, I see Kyle's ghostly form standing on the opposite side of the seal.
Maybe because I'm close to the other side myself now, I see the energy in the seal, too.
It glows like pale blue fire along the lines and those interrupted by drops of wax flicker like a faulty neon sign.
Kyle flickers, too and suddenly he's right in front of me.
"Use it."
"Use it?"
My eyes widen.
Kyle is right. With the seal compromised, the demon could come through easily enough but it won't be held for long.
Raf and Rex wouldn't stand a chance.
On the other hand, they'd talked about the demon like it meant the end of the world.
Could I risk that for the sake of my own life?
"Trust me."
Kyle extends his hand.
Trust a ghost?
Sure, given the alternative.
In the peripheral of my already shadowy vision, I see Rafael and Rexi mount the steps of the stage, moving towards me as if in slow motion.
They can't see Kyle, of course... they think I'm just sitting here, bleeding and in shock, which isn't entirely untrue.
Looking up, I meet Kyle's unnervingly black gaze, which is like staring into the depths of space.
Do I really want to know what's out there?
Do Rex and Rafi really know what they're dealing with?
'Fuck around and find out,' I think to myself and then I take Kyle's hand.
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Good Omens Is (Queer) Therapy
Crowley uses the love he feels for Aziraphale to let it empower himself. He turns it into a strength. He uses it to think outside the box, to figure out their path, together. This makes Aziraphale feel safe and protected.
His fall gave him the freedom to explore and to learn how to love unconditionally, outside of expectations and structures. (he even still loves God, and is in awe of Job being able to speak to her directly)
Aziraphale still has to learn that. His love is very conditional. He wants to break free, but can’t (yet - we’re rooting for you, bud). He uses the love he feels for Crowley to break himself down. He turns it into a weakness, a danger, a threat. Something impossible to be proud of, something that by its nature needs to be hidden and kept secret. Something forbidden, something wrong.
This makes Aziraphale act defensively in moments where it’s about their relationship and where it really counts. For me, the key moments here are The Bandstand (s1 ep3) and The Kiss™ (s2 ep6).
He says what he thinks he should say, what’s appropriate to say, not what he really wants to say. And this, inevitably, makes Crowley feel as if he’s a bad influence, as if there’s something wrong with Crowley. Not good enough, needs to be better. This feeling of lack makes Crowley anxious and worried (he is, by his nature, a very optimistic being).
Moving on, we also have:
When fucking Armageddon was upon them, when it really counted, Aziraphale chose to tell heaven first when he found the real Antichrist, and not Crowley.
That moment was my main reason why (in the book) I understood them more as friends than lovers. Because you don’t need to have a strong obligation to a friend, there is no expectation, but you do to your partner. If you have top secret knowledge than can make or break the entire universe, you’d expect the first person you talk to about that would be your spouse/confidant, regardless whether he’s a demon or an aardvark. But Aziraphale told heaven first (well, Metatron, but you get my point).
Turns out this was in fact a good thing to happen in the story, because they might have fucked it up big time if they had gotten to Adam before the horsemen arrived. Could you imagine an angel and a demon arguing like they did at the bandstand, only now with the Antichrist between them? He would’ve probably blown up the world just to shut them up.
Anyway, this is a major trust break for me, and as a viewer I’m immediately siding with Crowley. But, and that’s the good bit, we’re all capable of change! And I think we might learn a thing or two about love by watching Aziraphale learn, and Crowley leading the way.
All Crowley ever asked of Aziraphale was that he puts him first. Before heaven and hell and all the other BS. And Aziraphale has literally done every single other thing except that. Except the thing that Crowley needs the most.
Be on my side, Crowley asks. But that is too much for Aziraphale. His love is still not free.
And I love this show so much because I think we, as a society, are more like Aziraphale than we’d like to think. We can’t or simply won’t jump over our own shadows for the people we truly love. As soon a things get tough we get triggered, fall into old patterns and get defensive.
For me, this whole series is a therapy session and I am learning about love, communication, trust, connection and what it means to be human.
Here’s to season 3!
#i have things to say#about my#ineffable husbands#ineffable idiots#ineffable lovers#aziraphale#crowley#aziraphale and crowley#aziraphale x crowley#crowley x aziraphale#good omens#meta post#my 2 cents#love is love#queer#gay#lgbtq#welcome to my ted talk#therapy#the court is in session#gomens#good omens 2#go s2#good omens meta#neil gaiman#not sure if y'all are ready for this conversation
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One thing that I find simultaneously very baffling and very telling about the current wave of LGBT+ conservatism and sex-negativity is...
Where did this obsession with incest come from?
Pedophilia, I get where that came from - our society is creepily obsessed with youth, and while "pedophilia" is...okay look that's a whole can of worms, clinically it refers to attraction to actual living prepubescent children specifically because they are children, colloquially it implies ACTION on that/an actual literal child molester, but it's been weaponized against so many marginalized groups (especially POC and queer people) that at this point it's just turned into a rallying cry implying "ATTACK THAT GUY TO SAVE KIDS FROM GETTING MOLESTED" to get people to turn their brains off and act without noticing the subtext and most fears of it are DANGEROUSLY misguided, but even so it's PAINFULLY easy to see how you can start from critiquing how creepily socially acceptable ephebephilia can be (which genuinely needs to be criticized!!) - and you see that most of the people who care about the difference are creeps trying to use it to say "nuh-uh, I'm not a creep, I want to molest TEENAGERS, not ELEMENTARY SCHOOLERS, that's fine!" and you decide "no, I'm not going to play your game, I'm going to use the word everyone recognizes as colloquially meaning 'child abuse' because call it whatever you want, abusing a 14-year old isn't 'better' than abusing a 10-year old" and that can get turned into the fear of...whatever else someone wants to demonize under the specter of pedophilia even in someone who knows about the corrupt usage of the word. Furthermore, child abusers are...somewhat good? at using the internet to find new victims - even though they're one of the least common online threats, mostly what you see is scams and most child abuse is STILL committed by family or authority figures offline, but that's another issue for another day, the point is that we know that assholes creeping on kids online is at least something that HAPPENS, so in that context, it's pretty easy to start from a place of concern for internet safety and end up destructively hypervigilant.
But incest?
One, how do you expect incest to ever be normalized? There are no even somewhat widespread phenomena you can point to that suggest this is even possible, like you can with "barely legal" being a popular porn category or manosphere memes that center on how teenagers don't know better than to run away from creeps like them. When incest shows up in media it's almost always code for deep corruption. It's a pervasive negative stereotype of the poor in red states. How do you expect a few people with taboo kinks to turn that completely on its head?
Two, if that WERE possible, what is the threat here, particularly to the people you're saying it's a threat to?
Incest is bad because some 99.something% of cases are abusive, yes. So that's definitely not something we want to encourage...not that it's exactly easy to encourage like I said, but let's pretend anyway. Let's pretend that person you called out for writing an incest fic absolutely does want to fuck their siblings, and there's a callout for them for that - that callout is likely justified by the claim that this is a DANGEROUS person, and...that's really where this falls apart, isn’t it? Sure, it's good to care about other people, but then why the big public warning of danger that...isn't to you, or any other random stranger online? You can't recruit new family members to abuse over the internet. The closest you can come is get someone to roleplay a taboo kink with you - which...isn't inherently abusive, as it turns out! Consensual roleplay isn't abuse! How about that!
....oh. Wait a second. That's right, queer people have been describing their relationships as "familial" and even legally adopting each other in lieu of being able to get married for at least multiple decades, and laws against incestuous abuse have been repurposed against us for just as long.
Hm. I think some of you got weasel-worded here. Whoops.
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transcription of slides under the cut:
[SLIDE 1] the vibes ao3’s top 9 mdzs ships give me (a really stupid thing i made on a lazy saturday)
[SLIDE 2] wangxian: the wholesome canon relationship (with a hint of spice)
ok maybe calling the union between a demonic cultivator and a secret sex fiend “wholesome” isnt exactly accurate…but that’s where the “hint of spice” comes in
other than that tho? i remember seeing a meme somewhere about wangxian and sangcheng and wangxian was described as “domestic gays with a house and a white picket fence and two kids” and honestly? yes
not that they cant be freaky. id say their particular brand of freakiness is vaguely surrealist suburban horror. make of that what you will
[SLIDE 3] xicheng: either its “pair the spares” or just about trauma
their dynamic is 500% “karen/enabling husband” but like in a good way
objectively the best-dressed couple you will ever meet. like seriously why are you even trying? theyve got you beat
jc would own a flower shop and punch you in the face for saying a single bad thing about his flowers. lxc would own a tattoo parlor and hand you a lollipop and tell you how proud he is of you for not crying while he gave you a tattoo
they dont strike me as a “every evening we relax and watch the sunset” type of relationship B U T every other week they go stargazing with a detailed map of the night sky
[SLIDE 4] xiyao: either a) the angst of betraying/being betrayed or b) the angst of killing/being killed
high society gays. they would both unironically wear tuxedos to a mcdonalds. lxc would see it as a fun couples thing and jgy would do it to assert his dominance
i swear they would be among the smiliest of the major couples. only one of them would give you a happy smile
dont mess with them. no like dont mess with any of the couples but so far jgy is the first one who would make your life living hell and keep you around long enough to suffer the consequences
[SLIDE 5] sangcheng: being simultaneously over- and underestimated
i saw a meme about sangcheng and wangxian where sangcheng was described as something along the lines of “wine aunt and vodka uncle” and honestly? yes
they’re both human disasters. nhs would have various splotches of color on his clothes and you cant tell if it was intentional or if theyre actually stains. jc is very neat and organized but will have a mental breakdown at the slightest inconvenience
sometimes they just sit down across from each other and. cry. its how they bond
idk why it popped into my head but they’re both ace Because I Said So
[SLIDE 6] xuexiao: cute domesticity but also murder
i refuse to believe that xy is anything but unhinged in every universe. whether or not thats a good thing is up to you
xy could and would murder you in your sleep and not feel bad about it until xxc told him off. even then he might still decide it was worth it
xxc doesnt exactly know about The Murder Stuff(TM) but he knows some shit is off but he trusts xy enough to not comment on it
they would meet and hook up in a bar and mutually decide that they may as well stay together for the rest of their lives the next morning
[SLIDE 7] xuanli: the token straights (but also? theyre really cute???)
i did not expect them to be as cute as they were but here i am
anyway jyl has jzxuan wrapped around her little finger and shes just too nice to use that to her advantage
if jyl asked jzxuan for some chocolate jzxuan would just buy her the entire hershey company and forget to give her an actual chocolate bar and jyl is too sweet to actually say anything about it
they would definitely have like 20 children. theyd fucking love being parents. the moment having another child became dangerous theyd start adopting left and right. theyre rich they can afford it and their hearts are big enough for all their kids so why would they not?
[SLIDE 8] songxiao: childhood friends to lovers AND perfect power couple
i know they have more nuance than this but i cant help but think of them as The Perfect Couple(TM)
not shipping-wise!! i mean like. theyre both law-abiding citizens. their house looks like a model house. theyre dressed super neat and handsomely. they both know cpr and first aid and one of them is a lawyer and the other is an award winning writer. idk who is who but yk.
they are who people call to deal with problems instead of the police and they delight in that fact. that is what i mean by them being The Perfect Couple(TM)
[SLIDE 9] chengxian: disasters through and through
uhh i am going to be spending the entirety of this slide ignoring the fact that i personally consider them siblings
they would live in a dingy studio apartment in the heart of a city and theyd both never be home
theyre both super fucking rich but theyd never have any money on hand so dont be surprised if they just starve out on the street one day because theyre just that stupid
they collectively have the self esteem of rotting cabbage but theyre keeping themselves and each other alive purely out of spite and sheer force of will
[SLIDES 10] nielan: childhood friends to lovers AND himbo power couple
psst heres a secret: neither of them are actually himbos
H O W E V E R they both 500% pretend they are. they intentionally act as stupid as possible just for the fun of it
the best part is when they stop acting stupid when something important happens. crouching-moron-hidden-badass at its finest
also the older brother energy is overflowing. it does not matter who you are or how old you are. if you meet them then youre going to walk away with two new big brothers
[SLIDES 11] the end (unless i gather the willpower to make a part 2)
#mdzs#mdzs hc#wangxian#xicheng#xiyao#sangcheng#xuexiao#xuanli#songxiao#chengxian#nielan#wei wuxian#lan wangji#jiang cheng#lan xichen#jin guangyao#nie huaisang#xue yang#xiao xingcheng#jin zixuan#jiang yanli#song lan#nie mingjue
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MC is Half Demon and Blah Blah Blah-
Time for the Group Retreat!
Part 1 Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Lessons 5-6 Lessons 10-12 Lessons 13-15 Part 3 Part 4
I’m quite hyped for this one, ladies, gents, and esteemed readers! For simplicity’s sake, since this is before M!MC and A!MC arrive, L!MC will go back to being referred to as just MC. Enjoy the Headcanons!
Since the previous Underground Tomb incident ended much less violently, Lucifer is now more worried than angry about MC’s rampant shennaniganery.
Like... his kid was poking holes in his totally foolproof “Your cow-uncle went to live on a farm in the human world” story. What if MC somehow got into the attic and got hurt?!
It didn’t help that they were still in this weird phase of their father/child relationship. On one hand, Lucifer obviously cares for his kid, and his kid likes him... but it’s also only been less than three months and we all know how emotionally constipated Lucifer is.
MC’s also getting REAL sus of all the secrets their dear old dad is keeping... doesn’t help that they STILL haven’t went up into the attic.
Anyhoo~ the announcement for the retreat was a barrel of laughs.
“I’m proposing, a group retreat!”
Everyone met Diavolo’s announcement with the exact same confused reaction. It’s like the entire assembly hall was doing the ‘Guy Blinking’ meme.
“A... group retreat?” Lucifer repeated slowly. “For what reason exactly, Lord Diavolo?”
The Crown Prince was giddy with excitement as he explained. “MC told me about their middle school overnight trip and it sounded like it would be quite fun!”
Simeon, Luke, MC, and Solomon were all seated next to each other in the ‘exchange student seats of less importance’. Luke leaned over and whispered a question to MC.
“Why are you so friendly with the crown prince?”
MC smirked and shrugged. “Lucifer had the Demon-Flu and couldn’t go meet with Lord Diavolo last week so I went for him. Lord Diavolo’s surprisingly bad at Connect Four but has really good luck in Snakes and Ladders.”
Luke’s jaw dropped in complete and utter shock and horror.
“We’re playing CandyLand and the Game of Life next time, want to come?” MC added.
“Play CandyLand... with him..?” Luke looked at Diavolo, who was still explaining his plan for the retreat, then looked back at MC. “I’ll only go to shield you from his corrupting influence.”
“Yeah... Corrupting...” MC had to hold back a laugh at the thought of Diavolo, who during MC’s visit lit up like a Christmas tree upon being called ‘Dia’ and believed that Mood Rings were the greatest human invention ever, being a corrupting influence.
“MC! Torture dungeon or no!?” MC was snapped out of their conversation by Mammon shouting at them from his seat.
“What?”
“Do ya think there’s a torture dungeon under the castle, or not?”
“I’m not sure,” MC turned to Diavolo. “Lord Diavolo, is there a torture dungeon under the Demon Lord’s Castle?”
There is in fact, no torture dungeon. Presumably...
Everyone packed up and headed out to the Demon Lord’s Castle!
The fabulous seven all broke several speed limits and traffic laws in order to be there early. Listen, they had to get there before Purgatory Hall, it was a matter of pride.
Besides, what’s the Royal guard going to do? Arrest six of the seven rulers of hell and a kid? Ha. No. Not when Diavolo controls their paychecks.
The rooming situation remained the same, Asmo, Simeon, and MC were roomed together, and MC got to watch Asmo get psychologically profiled by Simeon. It was truly a sight to behold.
MC was nice enough to assure Asmo that they really liked him and thought he was very sweet.
Asmo, not used to being complimented on his personality, almost started openly weeping.
So, the tour of the Demon Lord’s Castle began! Asmo got yelled at by his ex in the painting and the usual batch of idiots got sucked into the catacombs under the castle.
Lucifer wasn’t terribly sure how or if he should express his concern for MC being stuck in the labyrinth.
All these new fatherly feelings of worry are very very odd. He didn’t worry this much for Satan, mainly because Satan was usually the threat.
Even as a baby...
Lucifer found himself checking his DDD every few minutes to see if MC had texted or called from wherever the painting dragged them to, never mind that if they did text he’d hear the phone ding.
“Lucifer, don’t worry too much,” Diavolo patted Lucifer on the shoulder, a bright smile on his face. “Your brothers and MC will be perfectly fine! There’s nothing too dangerous in the catacombs that they wouldn’t be able to take care of.”
Resigning himself to the fact that MC was under the care of his last choices for babysitting, Lucifer put away his DDD. “I know they’ll be fine, but I’m not overly pleased with the situation.” He shot a glare at Helene in the portrait, who rolled her eyes and crossed her arms.
“Lucifer worrying about someone, I’m truly, genuinely shocked.” Hearing Satan’s attempt at goading him, Lucifer, flawless demon that he is, resisted the urge to throw his DDD at his brother.
“Quiet, Satan.”
————
“WHY THE FUCK IS A SNAKE DOWN HERE?!”
“ITS HENRY 1.0!”
“YEAH THAT REALLY CLEARS STUFF UP, LEVI!”
MC and Levi continued their screaming match as the group ran for dear life from a giant snake.
Yeah... nothing the brothers couldn’t handle... sure, Lord Diavolo...
They made it out of the scary catacombs... don’t worry.
Lucifer did that parent-thing where he cleaned the catacomb dust off MC’s face with a napkin.
Yay! Parenting!
Failed pillow fight attempt #1 happened that evening. Because Mammon was obsessed with being the fun-uncle and saw his brothers encroaching on his place as favourite uncle.
MC doesn’t know how to break it to him that he’ll probably always be the favourite uncle and he doesn’t have to be such a dumbass to keep his spot.
Scavenger hunt went on as canon dictates.
Asmo had his diva tantrum and stormed off, but MC also wanted to win so they didn’t go after him.
Clearly expecting someone to go beg him to come back, Asmo was very annoyed when no one went after him.
“Um, helloooo? Anyone going to comfort me~?”
“Nope.”
“Well I don’t want your comfort anyway, SOLOMON.”
It was very close, L!MC insisted their loss came from sabotage. No evidence was found but just LOOK at Satan’s face.
Time for the Formal Dance~
If you’re wondering why Luke didn’t say anything when MC was suddenly poofed into their demon form, you’re assuming that Mammon wasn’t in on the “let’s prank the chihuahua” plan.
“Mammon..? Is MC behind you?”
“Nope! Why?”
MC was able to get to the other side of the ballroom with Luke none the wiser! Hell yeah, nothing like screwing with your friend!
So it’s canon that Lucifer is like, a solid 20/10, therefore MC is ADORABLE. What I’m saying is, some of the younger demons asked them to dance.
Asmo was also being MC’s hype man, which was very nice of him. Mammon also tried to give advice on how to be cool and suave. Beel was there for moral support.
“Alright kiddo, you need to be aloof and mysterious! People love aloof and mysterious, that’s why I’m so popular.”
“Don’t listen to him, MC. He flew into a wall as a kid and it killed all his brain cells. Just be proper but not snooty, sweet but not saccharine, friendly but not annoying,”
“Ask them if they want to share some of the hors d’oeuvres.” 
“Okay, first, aloof and mysterious are the last words I would ever use to describe you, Mammon. Second, Asmo I have no clue what you’re asking me to do. Third... Beel that’s the best advice I’ve received in recent memory.”
None of that mattered anyway because MC got swarmed with dance offers.
“Well,” MC smirked and held out their hand at the demon that was bold enough to ask them to dance first. “I admire the confidence.”
The demon’s smile brightened, then dropped completely when their gaze drifted behind MC. “I uh... on second thought... I’m gonna...”
MC’s potential dance partners all quickly scattered to the snack table. The half demon growled and turned around to see their father acting like he didn’t just scare away MC’s groupies.
“Father! What was that for?!” MC huffed, Lucifer rolled his eyes and grabbed MC’s wrist and began to pull them away from the dance floor.
“You’re too young to dance.”
“That’s crazy! They looked like they were my age.” MC protested, their wings fluttering in annoyance.
“Even if they looked to be your age, MC, they’re hundreds of years older.” Lucifer said calmly.
“What about that equivalent age stuff you told me about? Like how Luke is hundreds of years old but by angel/human standards he’s technically younger than me?”
“That doesn’t matter right now.” Lucifer lightly pushed MC towards the hallway that led back to their room.
“But I want to dance with someone!” MC felt their wings involuntarily fluff up.
Lucifer turned and smiled at his dear little brat, crouching slightly to get to their level. “Not on my watch.”
MC’s face was literally this: >:0
Lucifer is out here being the dad in every comedy that involves someone bringing home their partner to meet their parents.
MC was banished to their room, they spent their time angrily reading the manga they had packed.
When Levi escaped the party slightly later MC grilled him for details of what went on after they left.
“Nothing too interesting... except... um...”
“Spit it out, Levi!”
“...lrddiavlondlucferdnced”
“I can’t understand you, stop mumbling.”
“Lord Diavolo and Lucifer danced together...”
“...”
“...”
“I MISSED THAT?!”
So yes, MC’s desire to get a picture of Lucifer sleeping stems from VENGEANCE!
How DARE their father send MC up to their room and make them miss their OTP dancing together!?
So they call up their troupe of idiots and get ready to go be menaces to society.
MC also invites along Asmo because he seemed like he could use the adventure.
And because MC couldn’t plan the prank without Asmo noticing so it was better to just implicate him as well...
“Grrr...”
MC brightened and clapped their hands. “I know that growl!”
“It’s not my stomach, I packed snacks.” MC couldn’t see this, considering the room was pitch black (it must’ve been some kind of magic because demons have excellent night vision), but Beel waved a bag of chips in the air and got to eating.
“No, I’m not talking about your stomach, Beel.” MC skipped towards the source of the growling despite Mammon and Levi’s pleas for them to stop.
Ah! There he was!
“Cerberus!” MC cooed, the three headed dog stopped growling and barked happily. “Whose a good boy? Is it you?”
Cerberus let lose a bark that would probably make anyone crap their pants, but MC giggled and kept petting him. “Yeah! You’re the good boy! You like cuddles! Yes you do! Yes you do!”
A flash of light from a camera caused MC to drop their baby talk voice and stare angrily in the direction where the light came from.
“Whoever took that picture better delete it or I’m going to feed you to the dog.”
Cerberus growled in agreement. What a good boy.
“Well, as nice as this is...” Asmo huffed. “We’ve clearly been duped because this is not Lucifer and Diavolo’s room.”
“Oh well!” MC chirped and continued to pet the three headed dog. “Look at the doggy!”
“MC, you’re crazy. Dontcha ever forget that.” Mammon whimpered as Cerberus growled at him.
So yeah, they couldn’t get out of the room, so they ended up opening up the other door and falling into the catacombs like a bunch of lemmings.
Asmo charmed Henry, and they got out of the labyrinth no problem.
Yay! No consequences! Oh no- hi Lucifer.
Lucifer gave them all the mother of all lectures. Satan showed up with the rest of the gang and brought popcorn.
Belphie wasn’t there, okay? Satan needed to be a little shit for him.
Ah yes, the pillow fight... Mammon’s crusade to be the best uncle culminated in a massive pillow fight that ended with MC, Lucifer, and Diavolo standing over everyone’s unconscious bodies.
So they uh... won the pillow fight.
MC couldn’t sleep. They legitimately couldn’t. As exhausting as the pillow fight victory had been, everyone was snoring, and MC was bleary eyed and awake at one in the morning.
They eventually sat up and looked around, Asmo was passed out in a very unflattering position, Solomon was chanting god knows what in his sleep, Levi was half hanging off Simeon’s bed, Simeon and Luke were sleeping like angels (hehehehe-), Beel was in the middle of eating his pillow in his sleep, Mammon appeared to be dreaming about winning the lottery, and Satan was... suspiciously absent.
He was there a minute ago... weird.
Deciding that this wasn’t worth it and they should just go sleep somewhere else, MC got out of bed and avoided stepping on anyone as they vacated the room.
The Demon Lord’s Castle at night could rival the House of Lamentation in terms of overall creepiness. MC had gotten used to the spirits and curses that littered their home, but they had only been to the Demon Lord’s Castle once before, so they were extra careful not to accidentally touch anything. Their stomach rumbled and they frowned.
Damn, they had the midnight munchies... they needed a snack.
MC made their way to the kitchen and on there way, noticed a peculiar room through a half open door. Taking a few steps back to peek into it, they noticed... doors. A lot of doors. And ivy covered steps. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to any of the placements, and the room was... weirdly chilly.
“You can come in if you’d like, MC.”
Barbatos’ voice nearly caused MC to hit a high note that they hadn’t been able to hit since their voice began to change. They straightened out their wrinkled pyjamas and stepped inside.
The butler himself was walking down one of the flights of stairs.
“Um...” Quickly remembering their manners, MC straightened their posture and cleared their throat. “Good evening Barbatos.”
Barbatos smiled and inclined his head in turn. “Good evening to you as well, MC.”
“How did you know it was me outside? You were up there a second ago.” MC asked.
“It’s a part of my powers. I can see possible futures, and I foresaw you passing by my room and getting curious.” Barbatos explained.
“Oh,” MC said, half nodding and continuing to look around. A the sound of a door closing out of MC’s vision made them squeak and look around for the source of the noise. “What was that?!”
“It’s nothing to be worried about.” Barbatos raised his hands in a placating gesture. “These doors in my room are gateways to different timelines and some are gateways into the past of this particular timeline. That was another version of me passing by.”
“Does this... happen often?” MC knitted their eyebrows.
Barbatos hesitated before answering. “Not really. It’s quite rare. Lord Diavolo has expressly forbidden me from using my full powers freely.”
“Ah... makes sense...”
“Now, I believe you came down for snacks?”
MC blinked in surprise. “How did you- oh... the time magic...”
“Yes, the time magic. Now, would you prefer yogurt and fruit, or apples and peanut butter?”
“Yogurt and fruit please!”
I’m sure MC’s knowledge of how Barbie’s room works will totally not come into play later. I’m sure.
Solomon and MC graced the brunch table with their cooking. I think you can guess how it would have turned out if Barbatos hadn’t intervened.
Rest In Peace to Beel’s tastebuds.
Anyway, the rest of the retreat was all fun and good.
MC may or may not have slipped up and called Diavolo ‘Dia’ in front of Lucifer. It would’ve sparked a lecture if Dia’s puppy-like excitement wasn’t so damn adorable.
Lucifer’s got a heart... somewhere... it’s probably all shrivelled up and tiny, but I’m sure it’s there.
Everyone went back home, brought closer together through... pillow fights and surviving Solomon’s cooking I guess..?
Anyway, MC got home, unpacked their stuff, watched Kakegurui with Levi and Mammon, let Asmo paint their nails, made and ate dinner with Beel, continued their piano lessons with Lucifer, and received a 100% fake smile from Satan.
It was a nice day with their new family, MC curled up in their bed and prepared to go to sleep.
“Help me!”
MC lurched upwards in their bed, whipping their head from side to side, trying to find the source of the voice. Their room was completely empty, the perks of being half demon extended to being able to see in the dark. No new smells either, they were alone in the room.
Auditory hallucinations were common before falling asleep after being sleep deprived, creepy, but not too unusual.
“MC!”
Okay- that one couldn’t be ignored. It was common knowledge that the House of Lamentation was definitely haunted in some capacity, but the ghosts never really bothered the demons living inside, MC was partly convinced that some of the ghosts didn’t even notice that the demons were there. So it couldn’t have been a ghost calling their name.
“MC! I need help!”
The voice reverberated through their head, like it was trying to hit every part of their skull to make sure it was at least felt if MC couldn’t hear it. MC massaged their scalp and got out of bed.
The House of Lamentation at night truly lived up to its haunted reputation. Cold, clammy, dark, even by demon standards. No spooky old house was going to scare MC though, they walked down the hall with their head held high.
They walked closer to walls and furniture, knowing that the floor was less likely to creak in those areas. How did they know that? Mammon had told them it worked like a charm. Well, it’d work better for him if he stopped tripping over the furniture and alerting Lucifer.
MC was much more nimble and careful, stepping slowly and lightly around the hallways until they reached the door to the attic. They reached out to clasp their hand around the doorknob, then froze. It smelled like…
Oh no.
MC leapt away from the door like it was rigged to explode if they touched it and practically dove for cover into an alcove. The all too-recent smell of Lucifer’s fancy cologne and the increasing sound of someone coming down the stairs made them clamp their hand over their mouth and crouch down.
What was their father doing up there?
He had said the attic was full of old junk and there was no reason to go up there, so why exactly did he-
The door slammed open and Lucifer stomped down the hallway back towards his room, MC presumed. They were about to let out a sigh of relief when the footsteps paused. MC felt their heart drop right into their gut when they heard the footsteps coming back in their direction.
What were they going to say to him when he found them? ‘Sorry! This isn’t where the bathrooms are!’ The last thing MC wanted was to add to their father’s ever growing list of stresses. MC was totally responsible and grown-up, their father didn’t need to worry.
MC clamped their eyes shut and tried to slow their heart rate. Demons were beings of darkness and shadow, they could blend in quite easily. They took a deep breath, cleared their head, and felt the shadows of the hallway shift and cover them like a blanket.
Lucifer’s footsteps stopped, MC heard a tired sigh, then the footsteps started up again, this time in the direction of his room.
They allowed themselves a sigh of relief before relieving themselves of their hiding space and opening the door leading to the attic staircase.
If the rest of the House of Lamentation was considered clammy, cold, and foreboding, the attic staircase was that multiplied by a factor of twelve. MC felt themselves shudder involuntarily when they stepped closer to the staircase. Every primal part of their brain was telling them to turn around and walk away, but one tiny part was holding them back. They placed their foot on the first step, waiting for any kind of resistance, nothing other than the feeling of passing through invisible cobwebs.
“MC?”
Upon hearing their name, MC craned their neck to try and get a look at what could be waiting for them at the top of the stairs.
“Are you coming, or not?”
The cascade of warning sirens that began to blare in MC’s head went ignored as they continued to scale the staircase.
When they reached the final step, they were met with a long hallway, with a single door on the right side of the wall.
“H-hello?” MC tried to instill some force into their voice, but it still ended up quavering a little.
“Down here.” Someone knocked on the wall next to the door, almost causing MC to jump.
Oh. Oh no. MC stood straight in front of the door, and when they saw who was looking back at them they nearly passed out.
“Belphegor..?”
Belphegor’s eyes flashed as he gave MC a once over. His eyes narrowed when his gaze snapped to MC’s. The analytical expression melted into a lazy grin.
“That’s me,” he said softly. “Nice to finally meet you, MC.”
#Obey me#Obey me Headcanons#Obey me!#obey me shall we date#obey me! shall we date?#Yay! MC finally meets the sleepy cow-man!#Obey me Lucifer#Obey me Satan#Obey me MC#Obey me Mammon#Obey me Levi#Obey me Diavolo#Obey me Luke#Obey me Barbatos#Obey me Dialuci#Obey me Belphegor#Obey me Simeon#Obey me Asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me! headcanons#obey me! mammon#Obey me! Lucifer#obey me! belphegor#obey me! beelzebub#obey me! leviathan#Obey me! MC#obey me! asmodeus#Obey me! Satan
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MC Who Does Not Fear Death x OM! Demon Brothers
Or maiming, or apparently any other consequences. You’ve walked into this situation with absolutely no filter and no fear. Time to tear down every structure of Devildom society.
Lucifer
You look at him with a withering stare when he tries to intimidate you into behaving.
“I was summoned out of my trashy apartment to this place, where literally anyone could snap me like a twig on accident. I’m just working on the assumption that I’m already dead.”
He sternly looks at you. “You’re under my protection during your time here. No harm will come to you.”
You snort derisively, which visibly irritates him. “Don’t worry about it. I won’t come back to haunt you if it happens.”
As you continue through your life in Devildom he keeps calling you out for meddling and all that, like usual, and he HATES that you literally *do not care* when he threatens you.
Like HE knows that he wouldn’t hurt Diavolo’s transfer student but YOU are supposed to be AFRAID of him dammit.
His frustration at this ends up turning into a form of respect. You’re about the only person who will stand up to him, and tbh like you’re so fucking fragile but you’ll yell at him all day? That takes guts. Annoying guts. But you’ve got guts.
But also STOP IT. He has enough stress in his life and now he’s constantly terrified that you’ve decided it’s a great idea to adopt a baby balrog
Which you did once. He’s just afraid that “Flamin Hot Cheeto” is going to come back since you somehow managed to imprint on it.
despite the fact that the BABY could easily tear your arms off on accident
Not to mention he gets the flack for EVERY SINGLE ONE of these following stories. You stress him out so much. Please. Please, stop.
He’s almost to the point of begging. The Avatar of Pride is three steps away from either locking you away for the rest of the year or begging on his knees for you to calm down.
But you know you’d find a way out if he locked you up so no worries. It’ll be a good challenge.
Mammon
“Well you WON’T be dead because it’s my job to protect you! Are you doubting the Great Mammon?!”
Stupid human. Yeah, you’re fragile and weak, but that’s why HE’S your bodyguard now, and there’s no way in hell (lol) that he would let you die on his watch.
Lucifer would kill him.
You welcome the challenge, and he thinks it’s funny at first but quickly becomes a flustered mother hen.
“NO, we are NOT going out to Madam Scream’s at 3am! Do ya know what kinda CREEPS are out there at 3am?!”
And you sneak out the fucking window.
He has had more heart attacks in the past week than he has had in the last 100 years of life.
He starts agreeing to your ridiculous adventures JUST because then he can actually keep an eye on you.
He adores the chaos of the laugh that bursts from you every time you narrowly escape death.
He HATES how often you have to NARROWLY ESCAPE DEATH. So he will never tell you.
He almost doesn’t have time for his own shenanigans anymore, because all his time is taken up by trying to make sure you stay alive.
And you’ve figured out that if you turn *any* of your ideas into a money-making one, he will join you whole-heartedly.
So you bribe him because what’s money to you anymore anyway?
Leviathan
I mean he doesn’t leave his room much, so tbh he probably just gets texts from you that make him want to scream.
‘hey uh levi say if someone were to hypothetically be stuck in a succubus’ devil basement to become an unwilling sacrifice to asmo what would that person, hypothetically, do?’
‘probably die’ is usually all he sends back
You always come back, because he always sends a text to the other brothers. In that case Asmo came to rescue you himself and scold the succubus.
You become the friend that he makes funny throwing-shade reddit posts about. (Devvit? Devil reddit? Eh??)
‘Levi so this has nothing to do with anything but is there a cure for a dangerously potent ‘always win at rock-paper-scissors' curse? Asking for a friend’
‘Friend is being held hostage tho so maybe be quick about a response’
He didn’t even know that kind of curse existed. None of them did. What the fuck did you do.
How did you get taken captive by playing rock paper scissors?
He doesn’t know. Nobody does. He expects the play-by-play so he can recommend it as a new anime to his favorite producers.
Somehow your chaotic plans end up with stories almost as great as TSL.
Beelzebub
He physically carries you around.
He’s like “fuck this you can’t get into trouble if I’m holding you.”
If Beel’s on MC watching duty, he’s almost the only one who is successful, just because you physically cannot get away.
But at the same time, he is very easily bribed.
So yes, he’ll go to Madam Scream’s with you at 3am. Sounds like fun.
But he is very protective after losing someone he cares about (who you remind him of so much….) so he keeps you close when you’re out and about too.
If you start getting into a fight with some other demon he literally just takes the fight for you and wins with no trouble at all.
You like having Beel with you.
Especially finding street festivals! You’re in a whole new world and there’s a MILLION things to try. Beel is more than happy to try them with you.
But that leads to arguments about whether deadly creatures to humans are still deadly when dead.
“No, you can’t eat that it’s on fire. I know even small fires hurt humans. I’ll eat it for you.”
“That hot sauce makes every demon I know cry. You really shouldn’t buy a bottle. Please. No, don’t try it. No, that’s too much for one-- oh. Oh no.”
He forgives you as long as you don’t actually get hurt and you give him your leftovers.
Asmodeus
“If I get wrinkles because of you I promise you will never hear the end of it. I will curse you forever.”
He swears on every single one of his lovers that you have started giving him grey hairs.
GREY HAIRS, MC.
Why can’t you just settle down and let them all take care of you? You don’t have to prove anything to the other demons!
But you will. You’re living in Devildom now, and by everything unholy, you are going to live that life to its fullest extent.
He was thrilled at first when you were all for joining him at his nightclubs and parties. Now he hides every party’s date from you.
That time you almost threw yourself off a balcony to try and emulate a very drunk demon’s newest dance move.
“I need to stay TRENDY, Asmo!! I’ll be fine!!”
Ever since learning Demonus doesn’t affect humans you have challenged every single stuck-up tough boy to a drinking contest.
And every single time you win, Asmo has had to *narrowly* save you from being killed by said demon.
And you just say “he deserved it” every time.
And like, yeah okay, he probably did but YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.
Somehow, you manage to out-party Asmo.
dON’T TELL THE OTHERS but he lives for the times when you practically fall asleep on his shoulder while coming home from a rager. You may not get drunk, but when you’re sleepy, you’re so affectionate and something in his heart melts.
Satan
At first, Satan was all for the rebellious “life life with no restraints” thought process you explained to him.
I mean, he didn’t like the assumption that he and his brothers couldn’t control themselves to not accidentally kill you, but also… fair.
But he didn’t realize that this mindset followed through for EVERY demon in ANY place.
Including RAD, where old and wizened demons were *really* not used to being contradicted
Which led to you “accidentally insulting” your 5000 year old Human Studies professor by giving them a pop quiz on current memes (which they failed).
And left Satan as the one who had to make sure that said professor didn’t kill you.
And the thing is, this keeps happening.
You’ve written all over the school’s library books, pointing out every error.
You *continue* to argue with the demons who threaten to kill you when you say silly things like “No, Solomon did not learn his sorcery at Hogwarts because Hogwarts isn’t REAL.”
(Solomon, meanwhile, refutes you vehemently and seems to grow three inches taller every time you glare at him.)
Satan assures you that he values knowledge and truth and all that, but could you maybe find a less dangerous way to push it?
No can do, Satan, because you already had plans with Mammon to use a curse that writes the history of the actual Sorceric Academy that Solomon attended like 400 years all over the desks in Human Studies. It’s activated by anyone saying “Hogwarts”.
No, no, Satan, it’s brilliant, because you can’t do magic. It can’t be you who did it.
Satan, no don’t tell Lucifer.
I thought you hated him. Satan, wait.
You are the only person in the history of ever who convinces him to come to Lucifer for intervention. You wear that badge with pride and also deep, deep, bitter sadness.
Belphegor
Like, through the plot your willingness to be a thorn in anyone’s side just to get more information really works for Belphie.
He’s like all I gotta do is ask? Sweet. Yeah. Go, human.
But then when he’s all big and threatening and “im gonna kill you” and you just kind of look at him and nod like “yeah, this checks out.”
Frankly, that’s rude, MC.
And then he keeps threatening to kill you and it doesn’t even PHASE you like. You just keep listening to him rant and going “OH i think i get it now”
He liked that you were always looking for more information when he was the one pushing you around, but now?
No. Human, he is going to KILL you here, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.
And then you do the time-travel bit, and see that he *literally has killed you in one timeline* and you just like
Shrug it off and keep talking about Lilith???????
Tbh what probably stopped him from doing it again is just that you’re fucking insane, MC
“MC, you literally just saw yourself dead in Mammon’s arms”
You wave your hand vaguely in his direction and say, “Yeah okay, but can we talk about the lack of communication in this household because it is tearing this family apart.”
What the fuck MC
When he’s back to normal, tbh he loves that side of you. He loves getting into shit when he’s not sleeping. He will 100% encourage you and be there to make sure that you *don’t* actually die again.
He’s the only one who doesn’t actually try to stop you. Who knew he was so into chaos.
But if you try to drag him to a plan when he should be sleeping he will be like Beel and literally just hold you down while he naps dammit. You brought this on yourself. He needs sleep.
#obey me#obey me!#obey me shitposts#obey me crack#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me beelzebub#obey me asmodeus#obey me satan#obey me belphegor#bast babbles#my writing#obey me headcanons#gender neutral mc#re-reading this makes me vibrate with the need to destroy things#tldr is that humans are fucked up
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look. one can personally believe in utilitarianism(?) and thus believe it’s justified to kill someone for the greater good - that an individual in question is too dangerous to let live; and they are better off dead to protect society and to promote the happiness and well-being of everyone else. That’s fair. That’s a personal philosophy.
But that’s not the story My Hero Academia is telling.
Not in regards to Toga (and the rest of the League). Especially not when it’s been shown multiple times that the ‘tragedy of Toga Himiko’ was entirely preventable. If her parents hadn’t rejected her; if school offered up quirk counseling that didn’t “end up emphasizing the inherent differences between us all”; if the media hadn’t sensationalized Toga’s stabbing of her classmate (broadcasting her parents calling her a hopeless ‘demon child’ is terribly irresponsible, I think). I’ll somewhat concede that during Heroes’ encounters with Toga, she is threatening enough with a knife that they were too focused on defeating her rather than talk her down; but that itself is a flaw of Heroism - they escalate the situation instead of defusing it. Toga was willing to talk. Toga was sharing her thoughts and feelings. Toga desired acceptance. That is a chance for dialogue. Lie to her, trick her into surrendering to be captured and thus end the conflict just like that without excess, sure. But was an opportunity without need to battle to the death, and no one took it and now everyone has to battle to the death.
(No, that is not ‘playing therapist’. That is a fucking government worker, a public servant dedicated to ensuring the well-being of all its citizens - yes, including criminals. It’s not an intimate interpersonal relationship between people who are supposed to trust and love each other - it’s a legal obligation of an enforcer towards people)
(I’ve been watching Criminal Minds - which is a show that does promote the idea that the law enforcement officers are nearly-flawless forces of goodness, justice, and morality going up against irredeemable evil - and when they have the FBI agents face off against completely atrocious serial killers, even then the general rule is that they try their best to talk them down and arrest them. Get them help if they can.)
It’s not even that MHA is asking for every terrible Villain to be redeemed - it wrote off Muscular, and AFO seems doomed to die because he really is just too megalomaniac and dangerous. Toga gets ‘should be saved’ treatment because of her fell-through-the-cracks-of-Hero-Society-and-this-was-unjust-and-treatable circumstances that Heroes must tackle in the narrative.
My Hero Academia is a story about society and it’s relation to individuals. It has shown as clearly that its Hero characters want to create a just and peaceful society; and it has shown as how on the margins, it has terribly failed the ones who needed help the most. The resolution naturally is Heroes doing their best to save these Villains. Killing the Villains without learning any lessons from them and without resolving to change things so another Toga Himiko can grow up better cared for (and not dismissed as a ‘parasite’ or hopeless) is straight up failure and against everything Heroes say they stand for. That is a tragedy, not a victory.
If the central premise of this is something you disagree with, I’m sorry the story hasn’t convince you and it’s just not your cup of tea.
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