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loveharlow · 4 months

Text

SEVEN - 002

PAIRING ‧₊˚ JJ Maybank x Fem!Reader

SYNOPSIS‧₊˚[6.5k] based on 1x02.

WARNING(S)‧₊˚ swearing, mentions of parental neglect, mild violence, mentions of death/grief, disturbance of a graveyard (?)

NOW PLAYING‧₊˚

A/N‧₊˚ I've been wanting to do an OBX rewrite for a very long time so here it is, the first chapter from yours truly.

˗ˏˋ series masterlist ˎˊ˗

“DO YOU REALLY THINK BIG JOHN COULD STILL BE ALIVE?” Kiara’s slightly digitally distorted voice came from the other end of the line. Your phone was pressed between your ear and shoulder as you searched the hangers in your closet, bath towel wrapped snug around your frame and your hair thrown up into a bun, which was presenting more like a mess of damp strands.

“It doesn’t matter what we think, Kie,” You made clear, eyeing a cute shirt you thought you’d lost. “We should just be there for him.”

“Yeah… but what if we’re just feeding into a fantasy? Wouldn’t that make us bad friends if we weren’t honest with him?” You could hear her shuffling around on the other end of the phone as well, dresser drawers slamming occasionally.

“Maybe you’re right.” You sighed, throwing your outfit onto your bed and heading back into the closet to find a bikini to wear underneath. Living in the Outer Banks meant you had a plethora to choose from. “But the way I see it? If it were my dad that went missing, I’d be looking for him too. I’d give anything to even have that small hope that my dad was still alive back, but I know he isn’t… so, I understand.”

“I didn’t think about it like that…” It was sad to hear her so conflicted, as if she’d said the wrong thing.

“Well, I wouldn’t expect you to. And I would never want you to be able to understand that feeling. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.” You reassured, putting the girl on speaker to toss the phone on your bed and slipping the bikini you picked out onto your frame and tying the respective knots. “That’s why if John B thinks his dad is alive and wants to look for him? That’s what we’re gonna do. Because alive or not, John B is like a brother to me and leaving him to do this alone is what would make us bad friends.”

“I guess you’re right…are you still meeting up with the guys today?”

“Just J and John B for right now. Pope said he’d be around later after helping his pops.” You told her, slipping an oversized shirt over top of the bikini, eyeing your closet shelves for a pair of shorts.

“Alright, I might swing by if my parents aren’t up my ass about work.” She complained. “Talk to you later.”

“Later.” Was all you said before the end-call sound rang out in the expanse of your bedroom.

A swift series of knocks met your closed door from the other side, you shouted for them to come in, assuming it was either your mother or your dog Marley’s tail hitting the wood. The 2-year-old golden retriever had a knack for sitting outside your bedroom door on the rare occasion that it was closed and she wasn’t inside.

The knob twisted and in walked your mother, adorned in her signature navy blue pencil skirt and blazer, still a half hour to spare before she had to head off to her office for work. Rebecca Reyes was the Outer Banks’ most notable and renowned lawyer. Even when you still lived on The Cut all those months ago, she was still the island's number one defender. Moving to Figure Eight and getting rich, almost overnight, just gave her the resources she needed. You still questioned where all the money spawned from, chopping it down to your father’s life insurance coming through.

But the bank said that could take a while and you never assumed it was enough to buy a house on Figure Eight. But that’s adult stuff, you thought to yourself.

“You got home late yesterday,” She began bluntly, adjusting the diamond bracelet on her wrist. The smell of her expensive perfume already wafting into your space. “Where were you?”

“Just out with John B and the others.” You said with a shrug, walking out the closet with a pair of sneakers in your hands as you undid the tied laces.

She hummed, eyeing the space around you as if she’d never seen it before. “Did you hear about the boat they’re searching for? Scooter Grubbs’ boat?”

You side eyed her quickly, not quick enough for her to catch however. “Yeah, the whole island is losing their minds over it.”

“You and your friends haven’t come across anything, have you?”

“...I doubt we’d have any luck coming across a Grady-White, mom. Especially after the hurricane. That boat could be oceans away for all we know.”

“Right.” She agreed, but she seemed far away. Off. Why’d she care about Scooter Grubbs’ boat? “And what’s this I hear about some kid with a gun at The Point?” Your heart dropped.

“A gun?” You acted semi-shocked. “I don’t know, I wasn’t there.”

“Hm.” She droned. “Well, if you find anything don’t hesitate to tell me. Or Shoupe, for that matter. He said two out of towners showed up for the boat search yesterday, looked sketchy. So, be careful.”

You hummed in agreement, watching as the woman strutted out of the room without even a small ‘goodbye’.

You and your mother were nowhere near as close as you used to be. Your father’s passing caused a rift between the two of you that seemed irreparable. You just felt like she had become so cold and closed off, nothing like the woman who used to bake every weekend or plan family nights in the backyard. She was more secretive, dismissive. You couldn’t even remember what her smile looked like. She’d changed so much. She used to hate Sheriff Shoupe, said he was a dirty cop who worked under the rich snobs of Figure Eight. Now, it’s like they’re business partners of some sort and she is a rich snob on Figure Eight.

She even changed her last name back after your father died and wouldn’t tell you why. That was what made you feel the most alone. Rebecca Carter was now Rebecca Reyes but you were still Y/N Carter and your father would always be Owen Carter.

It was like she was trying to erase him and everything they’d built together.

You hated to admit that sometimes you wondered what your father would think of the woman she’s become. If she would be as unrecognizable to him as she is to you.

YOU SAT IN THE BACK OF THE VAN, legs bent as your journal rested atop your thighs while you scribbled down your thoughts and recent events — namely the events of yesterday. You had one earbud in, your playlist on shuffle as you half-listened into JJ and John B’s conversation that was happening in the front seat, the bumpy ride making your handwriting a bit chicken scratch-ish.

“I don’t understand why you don’t at least try with Kiara,” JJ started, his heavy boots kicked up on the dashboard. “She clearly likes you. She’s like ‘Oh, John B!’. She’s sketchy about you diving and then she kissed you, bro.” The blonde continued.

“She kissed me on the cheek. It’s not like we were makin’ out.” John B denied, brushing off the girl’s clear affections.

“Low-hanging fruit, bro.” JJ cut him off, the statement making you cringe in silence as you continued to scribble. “I see it in your eyes. You’re like ‘I kind of like that’.” JJ said in a mockingly low and seductive voice.

“Okay, you want to talk about me?”

“Yeah, bro, I wanna talk about you and your lack of game.”

“My lack- my lack of game? Okay, what game do you have, JJ? ‘Cause I haven’t seen any improvement in your case.” JJ’s head whipped between you and the boy in the driver’s seat within milliseconds before he was swatting John B’s arm.

“C’mon, dude...” He warned in a hushed tone. John B just chuckled.

“That’s what I thought.”

Moments of silence passed before their voices were heard again. “I gotta admit, your dad’s compass in Scooter’s boat? Freaky, man…” JJ claimed, twirling the newfound object between his fingers.

“That’s why we’re going to talk to Ms. Lana and figure this whole thing out. She’s his wife, she has to know something.” John B told him.

“And what makes you think she would want to talk to us?” You added, spooking the blonde boy in the passenger seat.

“How long have you been listen-”

“I’m always listening.” You spoke bluntly, a blank expression on your face as you averted your attention from your journal to him. “Anyway,” you dismissed. “A group of teenagers showing up to ask her about her dead husband, the boat that the whole island is looking for, and the compass we found inside of said dead husband’s lost boat? She’ll either think we’re criminals, FBI, or crazy.”

“Well, this is our first resort.” John B replied, eyes looking at you through the rearview. “We gotta try.”

“KNOW WHAT THIS HOUSE LOOKS LIKE?” JJ said, leading the group of us to the front yard of Lana Grubbs’ residence. “Whoever lives here smokes too much weed.” He observed the small, shack-like house — the walls were overgrown with weeds, the yard looked like it’d never been cut, the place was a mess from the outside.

The three of you stopped, more like flinched, in your tracks when you heard glass-shattering from the inside of the house followed by crash after crash. It sounded like the outside of a rage-room or a gun range.

“Maybe we should come back…” JJ advised, taking small steps back. But John B persisted, even as the two of you stood back in fear.

“No, no, shut up, JJ.” John B reprimanded absentmindedly.

“Tell me where it is or I’ll fuck you up!” A deep, brassy voice boomed from the inside. The voice so authoritative it made you shudder, but it didn’t worry you as when a woman’s scream followed. You could only assume it was Ms. Lana. “I’ll sink you in the fucking-” A crash, louder than the rest, cut off the sentence, almost covering the sound of Ms. Lana’s blood-curling screech.

“You’re hurting me!”

John B beckoned JJ and you on with his hands, urging the both of you to move forward. Reluctantly, and after a weary glance at one another, you and JJ followed the brunette boy who was edging closer and closer to the side of the house.

“Where the fuck is it?!”

“I don’t know!”

The three of you quickly dashed and ducked beneath the window seal on the only open window when you heard something hit the wall from the inside. You had just parted your lips to say that, just maybe, this was a bad idea. A terrible one, even, before a phrase yelled by the angry man inside had you shutting up.

“The compass wasn’t in the boat! Where is it, Lana?!”

“I don’t know!”

Your heart dropped as things continued to get thrown and slammed inside the house and you prayed those ‘things’ didn’t happen to be Lana. The paint and wood started to physically chip and fall off the walls outside, landing on top of the three of you crouched against the side of the house, wood particles falling into your eyes.

“Let’s get the hell out of here, man…” Another male voice commanded, followed by two pairs of heavy footsteps against the wooden floors inside. The three of you peeked around the corner to watch the two men disappear from the grounds through the front door, stomping angrily towards their boat.

The same boat that had been shooting at you only 24 hours prior.

“Those were the guys that shot at us.” JJ whisper-yelled.

“Go back.” John B commanded, pushing you all back behind the safety of the wall so they wouldn’t see you all. Once the boat sped off, the three of you slowly tip-toed your way into the house. The sound of Lana’s cries getting louder and more heartbreaking the more you entered the house, shoes crunching on wood and glass. Photo frames and dishes all broken into smaller fractions and littered on the floor, holes in the walls, kitchen cabinets hanging on by a single hinge.

“Ms. Lana?” You called out, voice laced with concern, eyeing the broken windows before they found Ms. Lana’s curled up figure on the bathroom floor right below the sink that was hanging on by a singular pipe. “Oh my God.” You gasped, kneeling right next to the woman and laying a hand on her shoulder that caused her to flinch and shrink in on herself.

She had tears running from her red, swollen eyes, curled up like someone’s child.

“She is tweakin’.”

“Shut up, JJ.” You hissed, shooting a mean glare at the insensitive blonde before turning your attention back to the feeble woman. “Do you need a doctor? We can call a doctor for you.” You assured, examining the multiple cuts adorning the woman’s face and arms.

“We can call the sheriff’s department-” John B was on the verge of suggesting before Lana cut him off frantically.

“No cops, please!”

“Mm, that’s not good. Let’s bounce.” JJ urged, weary of the woman’s persistence to avoid law enforcement.

“You shouldn’t be here...” Lana cried, her eyes focused on John B, speaking as her lip quivered and her voice shook.

The brunette’s face twisted, kneeling next to me to level his gaze with Ms. Lana’s. “Do you know those guys?”

“They were… looking for something.” Her voice wavered.

“...Does it have anything to do with this?” John B asked her, pulling the compass from the back pocket of his board shorts. You and JJ shared a glance, both knowing John B probably shouldn’t have shown it to her. “This was my father’s and Scooter had it. Do you know why?”

Why did John B think showing a woman his father’s compass and saying he copped it from her dead husband was a good idea? You had no clue. Interrogation tactic? Impulsiveness? Stupidity? Lana’s eyes were wide and teary, she looked like she was seeing ghosts.

“Scooter didn’t have it, okay? Don’t tell anyone that you have that. They can’t know that you have that!”

Your lips pulled themselves into a thin line and you were starting to feel less bad for Lana and more suspicious of the distressed woman. Maybe she wasn’t as innocent as she appeared. She didn’t seem to be a threat but she clearly knew things that she shouldn’t. You nudged JB’s arm, whispering in his direction even though the woman could most likely still hear you. “We should go…”

“You’ve gotta get out of here!” Lana cried, fearful gaze eyeing the compass in John’s grasp.

“What do you know about the compass?” John B raised his voice over her frantic one, still questioning Lana as JJ pulled him back and the three of you stood to leave.

“Go! Get out!” Was the last thing you heard as the hysteric woman yelled at your retreating figures.

“SO, YOU SAW THE GUYS THAT SHOT AT US, RIGHT?” Pope asked with his head in his hands, stressed after listening to JJ’s dramatic rendition of events. The three of you had returned to The Chateau and summoned Kiara and Pope not too long after, the events of today on the tip of your tongue. “Did you get a good description of them? Anything we can bring to a police report?”

You shook your head along with JJ and John B as Kiara and Pope sighed at you all's lack of response. There was nothing special about these guys. Sure, they seemed out of place but that’s because nobody on the island knew them. That was one perk about living in Kildare, everyone knows everyone. But these weren’t leather jacket, ski-mask wearing criminals. They didn’t stick out like sore thumbs.

“That’s not very helpful…” Kiara huffed.

“But, but,” JJ started again. “They were burly. Like the men I’d see at my dad’s garage. You guys know he made cargo hides for drug smugglers...” He reminded you all carelessly. “I can tell you with full confidence that these guys? They’re square groupers.”

“Like Narcos square groupers?” Pope questioned with little amusement, his face dropping as he watched JJ smoke against the brick wall.

“Like, Pablo Escobar square grouper?” You added on, just as skeptical from your seat on the patio floor, legs stretched in front of you and crossed over one another while you leaned on your elbows for support. JJ just nodded, blowing out smoke.

“You guys, not everything is a kingpin movie.” Kie reprimanded from her place next to Pope on the patio furniture.

“Okay,” Pope started. “What does a square grouper look like? Hm? Because clearly, you don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“Okay, you weren’t there! I wasn’t taking little mental polaroids the entire time, dude! I was under duress!” JJ whined to which you and John B rolled your eyes.

“Why would they want the compass?” Kiara probed, leaning forward in her seated position, resting her forearms on her thighs.

“That thing’s a piece of shit, you could pawn it off for five bucks if you wanted to… No offense, John B.” Pope claimed honestly, watching as John B flicked the object open and stared at it longingly, paying no mind to the boy’s insult.

“Well, clearly it’s worth something.” You popped in. “Considering these guys are willing to kill for it.”

“...The office.” You all turned to the scruffy brunette. A silent question on everyone’s face. “My dad’s office.” John B continued, shooting up and walking inside The Chateau as you all scurried to follow, shooting one another confused glances. “He always kept the office locked ‘cause he was worried about his competitors stealing his Royal Merchant research. Remember?” He directed at you and JJ, looking back but still walking forward. “We used to laugh at him like he was actually going to find it. But now that he’s…gone, I just left it as he kept it.” He said despondently.

“Yeah. For when he gets back.” Kie backed him up with a light-tipped smile. Keys jangled as John B unlocked the room you hadn’t seen in years. Not since before Big John went missing. Before all of this.

“I’ve slept over here like six-hundred times and I’ve never seen this door opened.” Pope said aloud, eyeing the office like a museum.

This was like being hit by a tidal-wave for you. And you’re sure it was the same for John B. You can remember the countless nights you’d slept over before and after Big John went missing. Before he went missing and you, JB, and JJ would peek inside just to watch him just write and type like his life depended on it. It even brought back memories of when your dad would stay a while after dropping you off to spend the night just to share beers in the backyard with Big John.

The nights after his disappearance weren’t as sweet though. Sleeping in a group hug around John B after his dad went missing. Then your friends all slept in a group hug around you after your dad went missing. Then they slept in another group hug around you when your dad’s body was found, washed up on the shore for the entire island to see. With the plethora of events, The Chateau became a haunted house in your mind.

“Look,” John B said, pulling you out of your stupor. He’d taken a bulletin board down off of the walls that was decorated with paper scraps and old pictures. His index finger pointed to the photo at the very top, a sepia-like tint to it. “This was the original owner of the compass.”

The paper pinned against the photo read ‘Robert Q. Routledge. 1880 - 1920’.

“There’s the lucky compass right there.” Kiara showed you all, pointing to the object clutched in the old man’s hand in the picture. You wouldn’t exactly call the compass lucky, though. And if it was before, it surely isn’t now.

“Actually, um. He was shot after he bought it…” John B informed. “Then the compass was shipped back to Henry.” He continued guiding you all through the timeline, pointing to the next picture. “Henry was killed in a crop-dusting accident when he had the compass.” You happened to look up at the exact same time as Pope, the two of you locking eyes with visible worry. “After he died, the compass was given to Stephen. Stephen had it when he died in Vietnam.” The boy ranted. “After that, Stephen passed the compass down to my dad.”

“This is painting a very bad picture, JB…” You warned, hand on the back of your neck as your face twisted.

“Yeah, he has a death compass.” Pope deadpanned.

“I do not.” John B denied, rolling his eyes and sitting down in the nearest chair with the compass still in hand. “My dad used to talk about this compartment here.” He explained, fiddling with the article between his fingers. “Soldiers used to hide secret notes.” He twisted the back of it off, revealing a word scratched into the top. He sat up with surprise as he spoke. “...This is my dad’s handwriting.”

Pope scoffed. “How can you know that?”

“He’s right.” You assured the doubtful male absentmindedly, squinting your eyes and craning your neck down to see the word written into the metal. “Big John had horrific handwriting and his R’s always had a point to them. I always used to think they looked like big-headed baby chicks, in a way. That’s definitely his handwriting.”

“Weird observation…but she’s right.” John B backed you up, his eyes going back to the compass. “Redfield…” He muttered. “What’s Redfield? Is it a clue?”

“A clue? C’mon that’s-” Pope began until you shot him a nasty glare, silently telling him to be helpful and supportive or shut up. His eyes widened as he gulped. “If it is a clue, m-maybe it’s an anagram?”

“Yes!” John B jumped up from his seat, beckoning you all to back up some. “Anagram. Perfect. You need paper.” He directed at Pope, eyeing scanning the cluttered space. Handing the boy an old, crinkled sheet of notebook paper, Pope got to work with the help of JJ and Kiara as John B and you scoured the desks for anything else of use.

Your ears were quick to pick up on the sound of an engine over the chatter of the brainiac bunch behind you. Eyes perking up to see a black truck pulling onto the yard.”...Guys?” You spoke, but not loud enough. “Guys!” You shushed them, all eyes turning to you. “Somebody’s here.”

The five of you crowded around the window, peeking through the blinds and peering through the dusted glass. Two males got out of the car and you recognized them immediately. “Those are the guys from The Marsh and Lana’s house.”

John B was quick to turn towards JJ. “Where’s the gun?”

“I don’t know-”

“Now you don’t have the gun? The one time we need the gun?” Kiara panicked.

“It was in my backpack and then I-...it’s on the porch.” JJ quickly realized, sighing before biting his lip out of frustration.

“Go. Go get it.” John B urged quietly but you were quick to step up, tugging the short sleeve of JJ’s shirt before he could open the door.

“No, no, we are not sending JJ out there to be pummeled by square troopers, square groupers, whatever they are-”

“We need the gun-” The bandana-wearing boy hissed.

“I don’t care. We stay put. We stay together.” You insisted. But JJ gently swiped your hand down and backed out of your reach, one hand up in surrender. “What’re you doing-”

“It’ll be quick, I swear. I’m like a ninja-”

“JJ.” You said simply, disappointed as you curled your fist in annoyance.

“I’ll be on my Batman shit.” He whispered before leaving the room quietly with the door cracked behind him, allowing you all to see him leave.

“John Routledge!” A country man’s voice boomed, causing JJ to turn around and slide his way back into the room quietly before he’d even made it two steps outside of the office. “C’mon out now!” JJ closed and locked the door as you all heard the pairs of footsteps enter The Chateau. The men began smashing and throwing things around just as they did Ms. Lana’s house. Was this their MO or something?

‘Window’ Kie mouthed, pointing to the window that led straight into the yard, towards the chicken coop and the surf shack. JJ and Pope rushed over to it as John B held down the door, which was just him standing against it with his hands above his head. JJ and Pope tried to lift the frame but it wouldn’t budge. Your face twisted in confusion, walking over to where the two boys were struggling and attempting to pull up the window seal yourself with no better luck.

“It’s painted shut.” You couldn’t help but smack your teeth, cursing under your breath as your eyes quickly scanned the room for something sharp as you patted the back of your shorts, feeling an object in your pocket. Digging your hand in to reveal a pen, the one you’d been using to journal that morning. You whispered for the guys to move before ejecting the pen and sliding it quickly along the seal to break it as quickly as possible.

Suddenly, one of the square groupers began kicking the door down, John B running across the room.

“Hurry!” Kiara whispered.

“I’m going as fast as I can!” You hissed. When the seal was completely broken, you wasted no time in opening the window, being the first to jump down into the backyard and making a b-line for the coop. The five of you piled inside one by one, the space surprisingly big enough for five fully grown teenagers as you crouched in tense silence. Just then, you heard a shot ring out from the inside of the house, assuming the man shot the door down.

Everyone could hear everyone breathing, shaky breaths all throughout the small enclosure. And the roosters. One rooster would not stop crowing. You were hoping, praying the damn thing would stop making noise. It wasn’t long before the guys were seen leaving the house, carrying at least two crates of books and research each.

“Pope, shut him up.” JJ demanded, referring to the rooster next to Pope that was making the most noise.

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Pet it or something, I don’t know.” Kie cried. Suddenly , JJ got up and grabbed the rooster by its neck, pressing it into the ground until its neck audibly snapped and its clucking ceased. You couldn’t help but cringe and look away, the sight somehow prompting you to gag. JJ’s eyes met yours as if he was making sure you were okay, you giving him a sickly nod in return. One that wasn’t as reassuring as you hoped. Kie was crying silently and you didn’t miss the way John B grabbed her hand in comfort.

“WHAT BETTER PLACE TO HIDE A MESSAGE THAN A FAMILY HEIRLOOM?” John B tried to muse from the driver’s seat of The Twinkie.

“Maybe somewhere more easily accessible.” You said bluntly, laying back on the floor of the van, your foot on Pope and head in JJ’s lap, Kiara in the passenger seat. “Like a hidden jewelry box compartment or a locked drawer. Not inside of a death compass on a dead man’s sunken boat.”

John B simply ignored you. “He had to know it was gonna get back to me, right?” He spoke hopefully, referring to his father.

“It’s possible.” Kie agreed from the passenger seat next to him, not wholeheartedly however.

“It could also be possible that you’re concocting wild theories to help deal with your sad feels- Ow!” Pope was interrupted when you kicked his knee, shooting him a glance that said ‘what the hell'.

“You know how I process my sad feels,” JJ started, your eyes drifting to him as your head craned slightly back from its place atop his thighs. “Dank nugs and the stickiest of ickies.”

“Preach.” You agreed, dapping up the blonde boy.

“Look, I’m not concocting, okay?” John B nearly shouted in frustration. “My dad’s trying to give me a message.”

“...If it helps you believe, John B.” Kiara tried softly.

“I don’t need a therapy session. I’m not trippin’ out.” He dismissed the four of you. “My dad is missing, okay? Missing. You guys don’t know what it’s like to have the person closest to you vanish and have no idea what happened.”

Suddenly, the two pairs of eyes in the back of the van turned to you. You couldn’t help but curl in on yourself slightly. “Stop it.” You demanded, averting your eyes to the window, watching the palm trees pass by. You hated when they acted like you had to be shielded from things because of what happened to your dad.

“It’s been almost a year.” Kiara nudged JB, letting it go. “But fine. What do you think the message is?”

“Redfield.” The brunette reiterated hopefully. “Redfield Lighthouse. My dad’s favorite place.”

THE LIGHTHOUSE LOOKED A BIT DIFFERENT THAN YOU REMEMBERED. It looked older, more rickety. You could swear it was leaning now. The five of you stood staring up at it before John B turned around to face JJ.

“You’re gonna post up out here and look for bogey’s. Alright?”

“Wait, why me?” JJ asked pitifully.

“...JJ, there are independent variables and dependent variables. You’re an independent variable-” Pope tried to reason.

“Shut up.” The blonde-haired boy dismissed with a snarl.

“We don’t know what you’re gonna do!”

“Just shut up!”

“Listen to me,” John B broke the boys up, pointing an assertive finger. “Pope, you stand lookout with JJ. Y/N, you make sure they don’t rip each other’s heads off. If we get split up, we meet back at JJ’s house.” You watched as Kiara and John B hopped over the fence and onto the lighthouse property. You slid your back against a nearby tree, one earbud placed in your ear as you drummed your fingers against your thigh, playing with blades of grass between your fingers.

“I’m gonna work on my merit scholarship essay. I’m trying to keep felonies to a minimum.”

“All right, would you just shut up already?” JJ sassed, you rolling your eyes and scoffing at them both. A few beats passed before JJ spoke again. “They’re probably boning in there right now.”

“Jesus, JJ…” You breathed out.

“What? You don’t honestly believe they don’t have a thing for each other, do you?” He defended.

“Maybe you’re just jealous.” Pope offered from his place in the grass.

“Jealous? Of what?”

“Because John B’s trying to move in on Kie and you have a thing for her.”

“Listen, dude,” JJ started with his hands out in front of him. “Kie’s hot and all but she’s a kook. I don’t see her like that.”

“That’s what they all say.” You sang playfully, causing JJ to whip around to face you.

“Oh, really? And what about little miss pretty & popular?”

You visibly cringed. “Ew, don’t ever refer to me like that again.”

“You’re telling me you aren’t crushin’ on someone? No rich, polo-wearing kid swept you off your feet during you and Kie’s kook year?” He egged on.

“Knock it off, JJ.” Pope defended when he saw how your face fell at the mention of it. You hated when they brought it up. Technically Kie’s kook year was longer than yours, considering you’d joined her kook friend group when you moved to Figure Eight. That was an era of your life you’d love nothing more than to forget.

“Fine, fine,” He backed off, his hands thrown up in mock surrender as he backed some steps away. Just then, the three of your heads whipped to the dirt road behind you at the sound of police sirens. You snatched the earbud out of your ear and pocketed it, standing up from your place against the tree. They were clearly headed for the lighthouse.

“What do we do? Do we wait?” Pope asked frantically.

“We can’t, man, c’mon.” JJ urged, sprinting towards the van with you and Pope following close behind. He jumped into the driver’s seat, pulling off before you and Pope had even closed the side door completely. You could only have faith that your other two friends made it out okay.

“NEXT TIME YOU END UP AT THE SHERIFF’S OFFICE, YOU CALL ME FIRST. DO YOU UNDERSTAND, JOHN BOOKER?” Your mother reprimanded the poor boy, her heels clacking against the pavement outside of the department. You didn’t expect a call from John B after you all had run from the lighthouse, coming from the Kildare County Sheriff’s Station from John B saying he and Kiara had been “arrested”.

“Yes, ma’am.” He affirmed. By the time you’d arrived at the station, Kiara had apparently already left with her dad who’d refused to bail John B out as well, leaving the boy with only one other option. The three of you stopped in front of your mother’s car as she now turned to face the two of you.

“Shoupe already has enough to deal with. The sheriff’s office doesn’t need a couple of rowdy teenagers on their radar. I don’t know what you kids were doing up at the lighthouse that led to this, but drop it. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” You both blurted out simultaneously, your mother having a newfound knack for intimidating people. She didn’t hesitate to jump in her car and start the engine, giving one last look as a goodbye.

YOU WERE AT THE DOCKS WAITING ON JOHN B, SITTING ON THE WOOD AND SWINGING YOUR FEET. You’d gone with him when he realized it was time for him to work, an employee saying Ward was looking for him as soon as the pair of you had arrived. He was up on The Druther’s, Ward’s boat, talking to the man himself. You couldn’t tell what the conversation was from your seat on the docks, so you waited. It was only minutes before the boy himself came stomping down the marina, prompting you to get up and dust yourself off.

“Is everything okay-”

“I just got fired.” He blurted, not even making eye contact with you and he brushed past you. You stuttered at his passive nature, scurrying to follow behind him.

“What do you mean you just got fired?”

“Ward found out about the gear.” He scoffed, and even with his back to you as he breezed through the working people to leave the dock, you could almost feel his frustration. “I can’t believe her.” He muttered.

“Who? Who are you talking about, John B?” You soon got your answer as Sarah Cameron walked by, you and the girl making brief eye contact with a mutual snarl on both of your lips before her attention turned to John B, who she somehow saw after you.

“Hey, John B.” She greeted, her hands full of paper bags that were filled to the brim with groceries, a large, brimmed hat on the top of her head. You weren’t surprised when he continued walking as you followed without a word to the girl, but she persisted. “That’s it?” Sarah scoffed. “Not a ‘hey, how you doin’’? Not a ‘kiss my ass’?”

You didn’t expect John B to turn around and swiftly walk over to the girl, getting all in her face. With the noise of the busy marina in the back, their close conversation became hushed but it was still audible enough.

“Your secret’s safe with me? Really?” Your friend pressed the girl. “I just got fired because of you. And I know you can’t imagine that but some people need jobs, so they can eat.” Nothing shocked you more than when he smacked the bag of goods from her arms, leaving Sarah stunned as fruits rolled in front of her sandals. Her jaw slack and eyes wide.

“What the fuck?” She hollered.

“You are exactly who I thought you were, Sarah Cameron.” He reprimanded, turning and leaving behind a stunned kook girl. Although, you would’ve paid money to see that again, it was such an odd interaction.

You knew he worked on Ward’s boat so he was bound to come across her but you weren’t aware they really talked. If you didn’t know either of them, you’d assume they were a high school couple arguing out in public.

The brunette brushed past you once again, taking his time and seemingly building up the courage to break into a run.

“Wh- John B!” You called from your place in the parking lot. “John B, where are you going?!” But it was no use as he simply left you behind and continued sprinting away. You figured you’d just give him some space to himself.

YOU’D RECONNECTED WITH POPE AND JJ SOON AFTER BEING LEFT IN THE DUST BY JOHN B, meeting them on the docks in The Cut. The three of you had been there for some hours, you helping Pope fix a generator while JJ smoked unhelpfully to the side when John B pulled up in The Twinkie.

He honked, beckoning the three of you into the van with a finger and none of you questioned what was happening or where you were going as you hopped into the rickety vehicle. You were mildly pissed about being left at The Marina but you got in nonetheless.

THE SUN HAD SET AND YOU ALL STILL HADN’T ARRIVED YET. John B briefly explained the destination and plan but you half-listened. You’d been driving for a long time, picking up Kiara along the way, with no clue as to where the five of you were going.

“Do you mind if I sit this one out?” JJ asked tiredly. “It’s been a long, weird day…”

“Look, I know I was wrong about the lighthouse.” John B acknowledged. “And wrong about everything else. But I was right about one thing — my dad is trying to tell me something.”

Just then you pulled up to a graveyard, the five of you piling out of the van with a flashlight each in your hand. “This place is scary.” Kie voiced. “John B, what are we doing?”

“You know how you’re trying to remember a song but you can’t remember who sings it?” He started. “Redfield. This whole time, I thought it was a place.” He explained as you all followed him further into the mess of graves and tombstones. “But it’s not.” He held the lantern in his hand up once you all stopped in front of a tomb, one of the tallest ones in the yard, revealing “REDFIELD” engraved in the stone. “It’s a person. My great-great-grandmother, Olivia Redfield. That was her maiden name.” He spoke longingly, looking up at the stone letters. “Help me with the door. C’mon.”

Pope stepped forward as the remaining three of you flashed your lights in the pair’s direction as they attempted and failed to push the tomb door open.

“Are you pushing?” Pope said to the brunette.

“Yes, I’m pushing.” John B strained out. Then JJ was jumping into help but even with his addition, the boys had no luck opening the door. They all jumped back when a snake hissed, peeking its head out from a crack in the stone structure.

“Woah! That’s a moccasin, alright” JJ started, jumping back almost cartoonistically. “Ye-old cottonmouth. Death in tall grass. Roof! Roof!” JJ started barking at the snake. Sometimes, you questioned his sanity.

“JJ! Shut up!” You warned the erratic blonde.

“You’re gonna wake the dead.” Pope slapped him on the shoulder, grimacing.

“Dude, they’re afraid of dogs. Everybody knows that.” He breathed out, straightening himself back out.

“Look, John,” Pope sighed, turning his attention back to John B. “We’re not gonna get in there, it’s not budging. We should probably just go.”

You were examining the tomb carefully, flashlight trailing the structure up and down before you noticed something. “I think I can get through.”

“...What?” John B spoke.

“You think you’re gonna fit through that hole?” Pope asked, worried.

“I’ll do it.” You reassured them, ignoring their concerns. “Just help me up.” They all shuffled to help you up — Kiara and John B holding the vines away and to the sides while JJ and Pope intertwined their hands for you to use as a human step-stool.

“What am I looking for?” You inquired, eyes fleeting to John B.

“You’ll know when you see it.” Your hands slapped your thighs. Helpful, you thought, but you didn’t ask anymore questions. You put your flashlight in between your teeth, like a dog carrying a bone before laying a hand on each of the boys shoulders, you put your foot over their connected hands and boosted yourself up.

It was a tight squeeze but you made your way through, landing on your feet and removing the flashlight from your teeth. It took your eyes a minute to adjust, staring at the walls of the spooky space.

“You alive in there?” JJ called.

“Alive and kickin’.” You called back, aiming the flashlight everywhere, scanning over everything. But the space was much bigger than you thought and your one flashlight didn’t seem to be enough. “I need more light, please.”

“Gotcha’.” John B said, pushing his arm holding the lantern through the crack of the wall, illuminating the space by tenfold. And that light was just what you needed.

“Oh my God…” You breathed out. John B may not have led you all on a goose-chase after all.

feedback is appreciated! thanks for reading.

SVN Taglist; (let me know if you'd like to be added!) @esquivelbianca @fallingwallsh @calmoistorm

©loveharlow.

#Spotify #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank #jj mayback imagine #jj mayback x reader #obx jj #SVN #obx fanfiction #jj maybank x you #jj maybank fluff #obx jj x reader #jj maybank smut #jj maybank imagine #obx jj maybank #obx netflix #obx x reader

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gonzo-rella · 2 months

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Headcanons: Being Married To Old Man Ray Stantz

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Relationship(s): old man!Ray Stantz x gn!also old!reader (romantic)

Warnings: Possibly inaccurate science words, because I'm a simpleton. (Let me know if I need to add any)

(A/N: Here's my first Ghostbusters thing! I've got a few other Ghostbusters fics in the works, mostly Ray-based reader-inserts because I'm in love with him, but I've also got a Phoebe-centric character study in the works that's based on part of her storyline in Frozen Empire. By the way, I loved Frozen Empire! I've already seen it three times, and it's such a joy. I'll try to catch it a couple more times at least before it leaves cinemas. Anyway, I haven't included any explicit spoilers for Frozen Empire in this, so you're safe to read this if you haven't seen it yet. I'd love to write more old man Ray Stantz fics, especially something involving Phoebe. I'm really excited to write for Ghostbusters, so feel free to send in requests! I've only seen the movies, but I plan on watching the Real Ghostbusters at some point soon. Also, even though I took my mum to see Frozen Empire the other day, I still don't have anyone to talk to about this movie, so please feel free to talk to me about it!)

It’s evident that, even after all of these years, Ray is still madly in love with you.

The adoration with which he looks at you is clear as day.

Venkman has always loved to tease you both about how sickly sweet your relationship is.

He will make fake gagging when either of you are affectionate to one another when he’s around.

(He won’t admit it, but he actually finds your relationship to be kind of cute)

It’s not like either of you are overly lovey-dovey, especially now.

Ray’s naturally a very passionate and expressive guy, but he’s rarely mushy.

Still, you show one another how much you care.

I have this idea that your silent way of saying ‘I love you’ to each other is holding the other’s hand, stroking their knuckles with your thumb and smiling at them.

It just seems so cute to have this thing that you’ve been doing for your whole relationship.

Ray knows you like the back of his hand, and you know him just the same.

It’s almost scary how well you know one another.

I can imagine that there’s been a time that someone’s asked one of you a question, and the other has been able to answer it with ease.

I love the idea of Ray being with someone who’s not a scientific mind like himself.

So, if you’re not as knowledgeable about the supernatural as Ray, you’ll still have picked up on plenty of information against your will, and Ray will always be impressed with and proud of you when you manage to regurgitate or understand his ‘science-y word salad’ (as you have referred to it).

He will also find it very attractive when you talk supernatural or science to him, but he tries not to make it obvious.

His eyes still light up like he’s a kid on Christmas when he explains supernatural stuff to you or tells you about a new psychically charged item he’s bought, and you find it so endearing.

Also, I can imagine him practically forcing you to listen to Podcast’s podcast when he discovers it, and you both end up getting really into it.

As devoted as he still is to his work and his supernatural endeavours, spending time with you is his greatest priority.

He might miss being an active Ghostbuster, but the silver lining of it is that he gets more time with you than he ever used to.

Even if you both used to be Ghostbusters, it’s nice to spend time together that doesn’t involve being covered in ghost slime and shouting over nuclear accelerators.

If you’ve not got anything else to do, I think it’d be sweet if you kept him company in his store.

Phoebe and Trevor are your honorary grandkids and you and Ray are beyond proud of them, especially Phoebe, who you’re closest to of the two of them.

Phoebe will always remind the both of you of Egon, so whenever she does something particularly Egon-like, you will exchange a knowing glance, and when she’s gone you’ll end up reminiscing about your old friend.

If Phoebe or the other Spenglers ever want to hear about Egon, you’re both more than happy to talk to them about him.

Even in his golden years, Ray is still the same sweet, passionate, excitable man you married all those years ago.

Sure, the regular excitement that came with Ghostbusting is long behind you both, but you both cherish this quieter time together just as much.

#ghostbusters x reader #ray stantz x reader #ghostbusters #ray stantz #x reader #x gn!reader #x gender neutral!reader #x gender neutral reader #x gn reader #phoebe spengler

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heavenlyhischier · 2 years

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hit the target - jason todd

summary: jason wants to teach you how to shoot a gun. you end up hitting a target; just not the one he had planned for.

word count: 1.9k

warnings: author has no knowledge of how to use a gun, maybe some inaccuracies, kissing, maybe a little angst, unedited

note: i have never written for DC before so pls forgive me if anything is off. also - this isn't based off any specific version of jason so picture whichever you'd like

Jason snuck into your apartment early in the morning, instructing you to get up and dress warm before leaving to presumably raid your kitchen. He neglected to inform you on what exactly he was dragging you to do, but you knew him well enough to assume it was probably something ridiculous. After sluggishly getting yourself ready, you walked out of your room to see Jason leaning against the counter with a bowl of cereal in his hands.

You paused your movement, admiring the way his shirt clung to his biceps and the way his tousled hair covered his forehead. There was no denying that Jason was a beautiful person, but looking was all that you could do. Once Dick had introduced you to Jason and took notice to the way you watched him, he implied that getting involved with him wouldn’t be the best idea. You could never figure out a real reason as to why, and he never gave you one either.

“A picture might last a little longer,” He teased, eyes unmoving from the bowl.

A light blush creeped its way on your cheeks as you walked forward, “Oh, I’m sure it would. What are we doing anyway?”

“Well, princess, I’m going to teach you how to shoot a gun.”

Naturally, you had assumed that he was going to take you to one of the training areas Bruce had at the manor, but he pulled off down some unmarked road into the trees instead. You knitted your eyebrows in confusion, but kept quiet for the time being. He parked near some sort of open area and stepped out of the car before going to open your door.

“Remind me again why we have to do this is out in the middle of the woods,” You questioned, leaning against the car to watch as Jason lay a few small handguns on a fallen tree, “Bruce has a perfectly good and warm indoor area for stuff like this.”

“Felt like it would be easier to focus with just me and you,” He shrugged, turning to give you a mischievous wink.

It would, in fact, not be easier. Your body warmed at the thought of Jason standing behind you, placing your hands in the correct position on his weapon with his body flush against yours. The way his breath hit your face as he told you what you were supposed to do filled your mind and that was enough to form an all too familiar knot in your stomach. You were so far wrapped in your own thoughts and fantasies that you didn’t realize Jason had been calling your name.

“You there, princess,” He chuckled as he gently shook you by the shoulders, “Lost you for a second.”

“Sorry,” You mumbled, too embarrassed by the images that had just been at the forefront of your brain to say anything else.

“Now that you’re back with me, let’s get started! We’re gonna start you off with a 9 mm because they’re easier to control than the ones I normally use,” He explained as he took your hand and pulled you over to a more empty area, “Here, take this.”

You take the small gun from his hands, the coolness of the metal making your skin tingle. It had a little more weight than you anticipated, but it was small enough to fit in your hand almost perfectly. You listened as he gave you instructions on how to eject the mag and load it correctly. You managed to do that as soon as you figured out where the button to eject the mag was.

Once it was loaded, you watched the way his hands moved along the gun like it was second nature to him, which it kind of was. His instruction fell to deaf ears as you remained focused on his hands and thoughts of other ways he could use them filled your thoughts. Jason noticed the way you spaced out on him, again, and it made him wonder what had taken you so far away. He knew he could just ask, but he’s known you long enough to know that you wouldn’t tell him. You never did.

“Alright,” His deep voice cut through your daydream, “I want you to first make sure the safety is on. Then, hold and aim the pistol the way you think you should so I can see what we’re working with.

Ensuring that the safety switch was indeed on, you gripped the pistol the way you thought you had seen the others do many times. You glanced towards Jason who was sporting an amused smile as he watched you hold the gun. You looked so out of place and awkward as you attempted to grip the weapon correctly, but Jason was going to take the opportunity to get closer to you.

Shaking his head, he moved so that he was now behind you, the front of his body pushed up against the back of yours. Your cheeks flamed red at the proximity, and they worsened once his large hands took your own and changed the position that they were in. “You were close, but you should always have your dominant hand underneath your non-dominant one.”

“Okay,” You whispered, doing your best to ignore the way he made your entire body ache for his own.

He clicked the safety off with his thumb as he started, “Now, to load the barrel, just take this hand,” He guided your left hand with his own to the slide, “And pull it towards you. Once it’s gone back forward, it’s ready to be fired. You only have to do this with the first round, everyone after will automatically slide in. This gun holds twelve rounds. You want to make sure you always count how many shots you take so you’re not fucked when they’re out. Got all that?”

“I think so,” You mumbled as your eyes darted over to his. He was close enough to you that you could see just how blue his eyes really were. You wanted to admire him a little more, but he cast his glance towards you and you quickly looked away in embarrassment.

“Never, and I mean never, look into the barrel even if you think it’s jammed and never aim it at something you don’t want to shoot. For now, I want you to aim at that tree right there, and shoot it,” He pointed at a tree he had drawn a big red ‘X’ on at some point.

He quickly moves his hands down to your hips and moves you so you're angled towards the target instead of facing it head on. He lightly kicked one of your feet forward and moved your arms so they were in the correct position. Assuming you had been placed in the right position now, you aimed the gun at the tree and fired. The recoil from the pistol wasn’t bad, but you still weren’t expecting so much. You stumbled backwards into Jason’s chest, making sure to keep the gun pointed away from the both of you.

“You definitely did not hit anything,” He laughed, his right arm holding you close to him, “But it’s a start.”

“It’s hard to focus when you’re so close to me,” You let out, pushing yourself off of him as you groaned.

Jason swiftly took the gun from your hand as you took a couple of steps away from him and unloaded it so quickly that you didn’t even notice. “I do have that effect on people,” He joked, trying to suppress the nerves bubbling in his chest. He wasn’t sure if what you said was good or bad and that intimidated him.

“Yes, Jason, you do,” You huffed.

He was hyper aware that you were avoiding eye contact with him now, and the last thing Jason wanted to do was make you uncomfortable. He always removed himself from the situation when he thought he was, but he couldn’t exactly abandon you in the woods.

“I’ll try and convince Dick to teach you some things, then. I know you’re more comfortable with him. He doesn't think you need it, but I think you should be prepared just in case anything happens to you,” Jason tried to hide the defeat and worry in his tone as he began to put his stuff back up, but you heard it.

“No,” You rushed out slightly too fast, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. You’re aware of his past and the way that he naturally assumes that everyone fears or hates him because of what he’s done. You had never felt that way towards Jason, and you were going to make sure that he knew that.

“I don’t want him. I want you,” You spoke through a surge of confidence that was sure to be gone as soon as Jason rejected that.

You watched as his movements froze, and you could tell he was trying to figure out how you meant that. Jason has wanted you to say those exact words for so long, and now that he had, he wasn’t sure what to do. All of the confidence he usually displayed was now replaced with a veil of uncertainty. It was too good to be true.

“We can pick up sometime tomorrow then,” He finally spoke, making the safe assumption that you were strictly talking about training, “We’ll have you hitting targets in no time.”

“That isn’t what I meant,” You whispered, gaze staying trained on his back Though if this went the direction you hoped; you would be hitting a completely different target.

The weapons thud against the tree as they fell from Jason’s grasp. You were still close enough to him that all he had to do was take one swift step and he was pushed against you. He was scanning your face for any sign that he was reading the situation wrong, but you had enough courage to close the gap between the two of you.

His lips met yours in a searing kiss that was sure to leave you seeing spots afterwards. One of his hands cradled your cheek, and the other moved to the lower part of your back to pull you closer. You buried a hand in his curls and lightly tugged, eliciting a groan from him that enabled you to deepen the kiss. You felt yourself becoming dizzy, but you had been waiting for this moment for far too long to back away so soon.

“This can not be happening,” A familiar voice broke through the tension filled air.

Jason pulled away and immediately unholstered his gun, aiming it at the intruder while making sure you were shielded by his own body. Dick stood there, slack jawed and eyes wide as Damian, who was a foot or so behind him, looked as amused as ever.

“What the fuck, Dick,” Jason groaned, safely sliding his gun back into its thigh holster.

“Me what the fuck? You what the fuck,” He yelled, pointing at himself then his younger brother.

You slyly walked over to Damien as his two brothers argued, and he gave you a teasing grin before he said, “Dick owes me fifty bucks.”

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd imagine #dc titans #dc batman #dc comcis #dc jason todd #red hood #red hood imagine #red hood x reader

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mixes-archive · 2 years

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König SFW Alphabet

Hello and welcome to the archive! It seems that a lot of guests have appeared since yesterdays advertisment, welcome! We do hope you enjoy your stay and make sure to read the rules :)

Requested by:

A = Affection

(How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

König is so affectionate, more so in private than in public. He loves calling you the most embarrassing german nicknames like Honigbiene or Mausi. Will mostly stick to Schatz when around others though. He also is very physical with his affection, leaning against you even if he knows you can't support his weight or carrying you around in various positions (man's is strong so he will carry you no matter what)

B = Best friend

(What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Becoming his friend might just be the most difficult thing you'll ever do. You'd have to be a bit careful around him outside of the battlefield, as to not scare him. But if you get him authentic Austrian alcohol or Mozartkugeln, he will be loyal to you forever.

As a friend, he'd constantly talk about his (and your) interests. König will also ask about your country a lot if you feel comfortable enough to answer his questions. He'll also actively seek your presence out just to be around you.

C = Cuddles

(Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

König is, once you get to know him, an oversized and touch starved teddy bear. He LOVES cuddles. Whatever position and wherever, as long as it's not infront of others. He will look for any excuse to wrap his arms around you though, yes, that includes "correcting your form" when you handle a gun he's even slightly proficient in.

Once home, or at base, you almost can't get him off of you.

D = Domestic

(Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I can't see him settling down, but if it was your wish, he absolutely would follow you anywhere to settle down, even if it was a country which language he didn't speak. But he'd probably ask to save up for a nice house where he doesn't bang his head on the door frames first.

He knows how to make a few Käsespätzle and that's it. If you know how to make Austrian cuisine like 'Oma', König will love you forever and beg you to teach him. He'll try to help you cook however he can, but DO NOT. let him near the stove.

He will gladly do the dishes and clean your home as a thanks though.

E = Ending

(If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I don't think he'd tell you, maybe write a letter and leave it for you to find once you get home.

That being said, you'd ever have to have fucked up massively for him to break up with you, or he's forced to for your safety. If the latter is the case, he will be back for you as soon as it's save to do so.

F = Fiance(e)

(How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

It'll take a while for him to realize your relationship is permanent, maybe a year or so, but it goes fairly quick after that. He's lowkey really scared of either you or him dying, so he kinda tries to rush a wedding.

G = Gentle

(How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Gentle giant baby boy <3

He'll be really gentle with you, since he knows how big n' strong he is, König will hold his strength back a lot. Although, if you're both on the battlefield, he will be much less inclined to care about that sort of stuff, just grabbing your hand and running or forcing your head down to avoid bullets.

He always thoroughly thinks about what to say before he says it, so if there's even the slightest chance something he says could hurt you, he won't unless absolutely necessary.

H = Hugs

(Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Much like cuddles, König absolutely loves hugs!! He's more inclined to stick to them on the battlefield since there isn't much time for affection there. His hugs are so warm and soft though, your face either stuck in his man-boobs or in the crook of his neck.

I = I love you

(How fast do they say the L-word?)

When either he or you confesses to the other. After that, he'll say it all the time. Alternatively, if you've been friends for a long time and your relationship just progressed in a romantic way, he'll have said it wayyy before he had those kinds of feelings for you.

J = Jealousy

(How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Probably not that jealous, unless someone is explicitly flirting with and not leaving you alone. In that case, König will magically find more courage than any person should have and scare them away at all cost if they don't leave you alone.

After, he'll give you a lil kissy and say something like "Niemand sollte dich stören wenn du das nicht willst, Schatz."

K = Kisses

(What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

A TON of forehead, nose and hair kisses. If his mask is on, he's more likely to kiss your hands, shoulders or neck. If you're really lucky, he'll even lift his mask up a teeny tiny bit and kiss you properly.

König is no more than putty in your hands if you kiss the corner of his mouth.

L = Love language

(How do they show their affection?)

GIFT GIVING, PARALLEL PLAY AND PHYSICAL AFFECTION. He loves collecting little trinkets for you!! Going from small flowers to an absolutely gorgeous necklace (he'll keep the secret of how much it cost to his grave). And honestly, König gets so giddy when he's in a 10 meter radius of you. If you leave the room to go sit somewhere else, he'll follow you around too. If he was drawing you, König will look at you like this >:(, but immediately melt if you just keep working and acknowledging his presence occasionally.

Also, just loves holding you however you prefer, he likes it warm >:)

M = Morning

(How are mornings spent with them?)

Trying to escape his iron grip to get ready. (spoiler: he will not let go ever)

You can however, convince him to let you go if you say you'll make breakfast. He'll consider letting you get up then.

N = Night

(How are nights spent with them?)

Cuddling and maybe having him talk to you in german. He'll try to teach you if you can't speak it too. If you respond, König will actually be so happy and fall asleep with a smile on his face :)

O = Open

(When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Honestly, once you get past his shyness, he's so talkative with you. If you ask, he'll tell you anything about his past and his childhood growing up in different parts of Austria.

P = Patience

(How easily angered are they?)

We all know how irritable he gets on the battlefield, but no matter what you do, that anger will never, ever be directed at you. You could literally murder his entire family and he'd be "Schatz, why did you do that? :( That wasn't nice :(( Please can we talk about this? :["

But seriously, if you do find some way to make him angry, he'll write you a letter and leave you alone for some time until he's cooled down.

Q = Quizzes

(How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Every. Single. Detail. If you told him about that one embarrassing thing you did in fifth grade, he won't only remember what you did, he'll also remember how you said it, the look of absolute horror in your eyes when you realized just how cringe it was and the way your arms moved was just so fascinating to him.

König will also write a lot of what you say down in is diary, occasionally reading old entries about you when he's separated from you for a long time.

R = Remember

(What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

(Trying) To make Schnitzel and Petersilkartoffeln on your off-day at base. König doesn't even think he'll forget the wretched smell the first burnt Schnitzel produced, but the payoff of the smile on your face and the final meal is unforgettable to him.

If he has the chance, he'll absolutely tell everyone about the story, his shyness leaving him for even just a minute or so.

S = Security

(How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

With his life. And his body too. König has been a meat-shield to you one too many times for your taste.

But in turn, you have to keep a little bit of a look out for him at social situations.

T = Try

(How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Maybe not effort, but a lot of thought. When it comes to tasks and dates at least.

König starts working on gifts month in advance, putting his blood, sweat and tears into it to get it just right for you.

U = Ugly

(What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

If he can't remember how to say something in English or misuse a phrase, he'll stop talking for a little while, sulking about 'not being able to communicate properly'. He also has the tendency to back out of social situations last minute.

V = Vanity

(How concerned are they with their looks?)

Only about his skin. Man's uses more skincare items than one of those clean girl grwm on TikTok. After he meets you, he'll possibly also care a little more about his hair, but that's it.

W = Whole

(Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He relies on you a lot. Both in senses of communicating with others, as well as emotionally and physically. If you're gone for a while, he'll start hugging pillows and writing romantic letters he never sends. He's much more shy when you aren't around.

X = Xtra

(A random headcanon for them.)

Loves to draw you and flowers specifically. Also keeps trying to dry them in his sketchbook, but forgets they're in there and opens it before they've dried.

Y = Yuck

(What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Probably someone who makes fun of him for being shy, or bosses him around all the time.

Z = Zzz

(What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Hugging you and pressing your face into his tiddies<3

König loves gathering a lot of blankets and just stewing them atop both of you!!

A/N: he is so bbg and I love him please keep the requests coming

#call of duty #cod x reader #könig x reader #call of duty x reader #konig x reader

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a-sweet-desperate-softie · 4 months

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Not gonna go into detail but I’ve finally gotten some health/mental health stuff figured out and my insatiable love for omo is back in full force! Long story short, I couldn’t focus long enough to enjoy holding, which sucked. To celebrate here’s a list (in no particular order) of sensations that I haven’t enjoyed in a few months and THOROUGHLY FUCKING ENJOYED yesterday 🤭

———

- When you can feel the first signs of fullness, like a warm tingle just above your pubic bone. A light press or a gentle trailing of your fingers sends butterflies all the way to the soles of your feet.

- When you set a fifteen minutes timer on repeat to remind you to drink 8oz of water (except, you get to “celebrate” at the top of every hour with juice, soda, or kombucha) and you KNOW you would be able to hold it all so you start to think of nothing else—eventually, you’re going to have to pee… how’s that gonna end up? In your pants? What pants? What underwear? Where will you be? What will you be doing? Do you want to enjoy it or do you want to feel ashamed? Either way, you’re going to have to pee, so you better start thinking.

- When you pretend to get up and use the toilet every time you feel the urge to pee. You don’t ACTUALLY get to use the toilet of course. No, you do, however, have to sit on the toilet, maybe wipe yourself to make your body feel even more desperate to pee—then you just have to sit there and not pee. It doesn’t matter if you have your pants pulled up or down, getting up and walking to the bathroom because you need to pee and then intentionally not peeing gets really frustrating by the third time in any given hour. And don’t forget to flush and wash your hands! Especially if others are home: we wouldn’t want anyone asking questions about what did or didn’t happen in the bathroom. Plus, don’t you want to caress your nice, warm, wet hands while your bladder is slowly stretching to capacity? 😘

- Mmmmmmm, and then, eventually, the potty dance. I’m convinced that potty dances are just like any other dance. They evolve from one basic movement and any variation from that movement risks losing connection with your body. Maybe you start with the subtle little left-right wiggle of your hips. It might be slow, it might be a little more hurried. Either way, the repetition quenches your bodies need to feel movement. It WANTS to move all the pee you’ve been collecting in your now slightly bulging bladder but you try to satiate it with your cute little dancing. But the repetition: left… right… left… right… left… it’s blissful until it’s not enough. Then your movements become more exaggerated—basic back and forth won’t cut it any longer. You start to feel your first panic moments. Sudden rushes of desperation cause the sphincter at the base of your bladder and all the small, interconnected stabilizing muscles to start to scream for release. But they’re small little muscles, so you don’t feel them as screams. No, you feel them as the sudden, seemingly-out-of-nowhere, “oh fuck did I just leak???” type of moments. You can’t feel exactly what muscle, what part of that delicate and oh-so-sensitive area finally gave in, but now every other part has to overcompensate for that failure. If you don’t do something more drastic it feels like your whole bladder is just going to burst from your urethra like a water balloon that you never take off the end of the hose. It just fills until the bottom blows out.

———

Alright, that’s good for now. I’ve got shjt to do today, but there might be more of this type of recounting throughout today. New adventures await me ☺️

#omorashi #pants wetting #desperation wetting #pee accident #intentional wetting #i’m a puddle on the floor #i’m in a puddle on the floor #stoned omo

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gemini-sensei · 10 months

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Not What You Think | Tattooist!Hawk x Chubby!Reader

Tattoo Parlor AU ○ Based off of this POST ○

CW: suggestive themes, vulgar language, mentions of needles and healing processes (unedited).

"So did she actually get a tattoo or did you fuck her?" Tory asked. She was sitting at the worktable in the lobby, working on a drawing for a client. Her eyes stayed on the paper, but her ears were pert as the parlor fell quiet.

Hawk was trying to eat a granola bar, having just sent his newest client out the door with a "have a nice rest of your day" and an appointment card to come back for any touch ups her tattoo. She'd been very sweet, very easy to work with. She sat well, except for one little uncontrollable thing...

She moaned a lot during the session. Hours on hours of moaning. Fairly loud moans as well.

He almost choked on the granola and chocolate in his mouth upon hearing the question. It still made him cough and as he did his best to not die, Tory barked with laughter. She was the only one.

Then Robby spoke uo. "I thought he might very been killing her."

"Oh my god, I know," Tory groaned. She stopped drawing and sat back in her chair, finally looking up. "No one should be making those kind of noises back there."

Hawk finally regained his strength amd wits, taking a sip of long overdue water. "Shut up. Everyone reacts differently to getting a needle stuck into them a thousand times. And I was tattooing the the backs of the thighs, she's a little thick, so they were sensitive."

"I'm sure she enjoyed you grabbing her thick ass thighs," Tory snickered.

Hawk glared at her, but she only smirked in response. However, before he could come up with a witty comeback, someone else interjected.

Demetri grimaced. "I can't stand here and listen to this anymore. It was bad enough hearing the... noises coming from your room. I don't need any speculative imagery to go along with it. I have a two o'clock coming in soon, so maybe don't talk about it anymore either."

With that, he let the room and walked down the hall to his work room. He shut the door for some peace and quiet. Tory rolled her eyes and gathered her stuff.

"Whatever, she's just lucky she was the only one booked while she was here. I saw how embarrassed she was walking out of here, so I can only image how much worse it would have been had the rest of us has someone here," she said. Then she stood up and sighed.

Miguel let out a huff that was between disbelief and astonishment. "Yeah, my client had to reschedule. Kinda glad he did."

Robby shrugged. "I'm just waiting on walk-ins honestly."

Tory smirked and looked at Hawk. "Lucky, lucky you."

"Shut up, Tory," he spat, tired of the teasing.

They all cleared out of the lobby except for Miguel and Hawk. Miguel was at the reception desk, working on the computer as the phone rang. He greeted the person on the other end with his usual enthusiasm and Hawk walked outside, looking for some fresh air.

As soon as he was outside and leaning on the wall, Sam was walking up from her car. She smiled brightly and pushed her sunglasses up. "Hey, Hawk!"

"Hey," he grumbled.

Her smile quickly turned into a frown. "What's wrong?"

If anyone had a fix to a problem, it was Sam. That was part of her job after all. So even though it was a little embarrassing, he told her about what happened. "I had this new client come in. She was looking for a new shop to go to because all the ones she went to before never wanted her back. I wasn't worried about it. She's really sweet, too, so I didn't understand what everyone else's problem was."

"Did he kick and scream or something?"

"Worse."

"Break something?"

"No."

"Then what did she do?"

"She moaned. A lot. Like, the whole time I was tattooing her."

"Oh." Sam's pulled an awkward face before fixing it. She became thoughtful. "So what's the problem?"

"She's coming back for touchups and the second half of her tattoo."

"I see," she mused.

Things became silent and Hawk thought there was no way to fix this. There wasn't even a "real" problem to solve, but it sure did feel like there was. He rested his head back on the brick wall behind him and sighed. Just as he thought there was no hope, only further awkward situations, Sam let out a loud,

"Aha! I got it!"

"What?" he asked her, standing from the wall and turning to her hopeful.

She smiled. "You have your own studio at home, right? I know you've tattooed Miguel up there plenty of times. So why don't you just invite her out there for a more private setting. Surely that will be a lot better for you and especially her."

"Invite a stranger to my house? Are you crazy?"

"What's the difference than picking up a girl and taking her home?"

They were quiet for a moment, then Hawk sighed, knowing she was right. He supposed it wasn't a totally bad idea either. So he relented and nodded to her.

"Okay, I'll call her in a few to rearrange some things. Can't be too hard, right? And it's just a tattoo. What's the worst that could happen?"

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i-turned-into-the-stone · 2 months

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Pickles!

GREETINGS!

WELCOME TO OUR COLLECTION OF PICKLES, OR AS WE LIKE TO CALL IT, "CASUAL SMUT."

WE'VE GOT A BUNCH OF THESE THAT HAVE BEEN MARINATING FOR QUITE SOME TIME.

EACH WEEK, WE'RE GONNA GRAB ONE OF THESE PICKLES, NO PARTICULAR ORDER, AND SERVE IT UP.

JUST A HEADS UP, IF I GET A COMMISSION, I WILL HIT THE PAUSE BUTTON ON CASUAL SMUT PRODUCTION FOR THE WEEK.

PLEASE REFER TO THE PICKLE JAR STATUS TO CHECK. THANK YOU.

Pickle Jar Status:

[ONLINE] - Casual Smut ongoing

[OFFLINE] - Commission Smut ongoing

[AFK] - Resting

Request is closed at the moment but questions and other stuff are welcomed.

Schedule:

❎ = Pending

✅ = Completed

🔛 = Ongoing

🔛 1. Karina ft. Winter

Plot: Bratty younger sister Karina that always threatens her brother to do her chores probably works better for the plot but we all know bitchy Karina Noona getting taught a lesson is way hotter.

❎ 2. Baek Jiheon

Plot: Hi, can you please write a mind-break non-con for Baek Jiheon, that adorable little kitten needs to experience some dick in her tight little pussy.

❎ 3. Rei

Plot: IVE Rei tricked into something else due to "language barriers".

❎ 4. Ahn Yujin

Plot: Secretary Yujin of a middle-aged Chaebol has more physical work than desk work contrary to what people think. On an average day, she starts the day warming her master's cock wrapping it with her warm holes. If there is a higher-up meeting, she serves gangbang while they talk about important business. Getting tossed from one man's lap to another one or two is her main job basically. Her boss even fuck her wherever in the office building he wants. The day ended with her all holes stuffed with cum and a wicked smile on her face getting exactly what this slut loves.

❎ 5. Shuhua

A/N plot: Please write a smut based on Shuhua's recent Instagram post where she uploaded a pic of her huge ass from behind. Please write a non-con as degrading as possible. Badass girl deserves hardcore punishment.

❎ 6. SuA

Plot: Bend over, tie down to a table, and force to take a train of men, each one’s penis bigger than the previous. Abused, pissed on, beaten, broken, and getting so far that something snaps in her mind, making her use the guys who broke her until they can't do it anymore and she gets mad for this, getting hysterical and screaming at them to give her more.

❎ 7. Swan

Plot: I see you're a non-con enthusiast, can you make me a Purple Kiss Swan smut? The twist is it's Swan who's doing the non-conning, and the reader can't help but accept the fact she's totally dominating you for being subtle about her feelings. (I don't say I request a non-con Yandere Swan but yeah)

❎ 8. Lily

Plot: Here's another idea for you if you're interested. Your daughter Haewon is behaving rudely to you and even misses Father's Day to go out partying, but her best friend Lily sees this and feels bad, and decides to make it up to you in bed, seducing you and even making you film it and send it to haewon.

❎ 9. Yoon

Plot: How about STAYC Yoon being accidentally mistaken as a prostitute by a sexpat?

❎ 10. Yeji/Yuna

Plot: For the cervix penetration I think if you choose Yeji maybe after deep penetration the cervix starts dilating, Yuna why not push it through 🫣

❎ 11. Bada Lee/Ryujin

A/N plot: Huge fan of your work! could you do a bada Lee or a Ryujin smut? (I know Bada Lee but not that interested in her so I might do Ryujin. I will see how it goes.)

❎ 12. Tzuyu

Plot: Volleyball player Tzuyu who gets injured during a game and the trainer! the reader who takes advantage of her while she can't get away.

❎ 13. Hikaru

A/N plot: What if for Hikaru, you still stand and carry, but you pass her around to other men?

❎ 14. Wonyoung

Plot: Wonyoung gets humbled by obsessed fans for acting cocky. So they put her in her slutty place by thoroughly fucking her every hole mindlessly throughout the night. And they didn't forget to stream it live either.

❎ 15. AleXa

A/N plot: Gets fucked and ruined by cocks larger than her arms.

❎ 16. Giselle

Plot: Gym rat Giselle getting mercilessly punished by real bodybuilders at the gym for teasing them with her thick ass and thighs. So they raped her using the gym equipment, to use her in deeper reaching positions. They pounded her ass until her tight hole loosened wide and she couldn't keep her shit anymore pooping uncontrollably in front of everyone. You can also add Somi in the story like she is the one who conspired against her out of her jealousy for thickness but the men fucked the shit out of both of them anyway.

❎ 17. J

Plot: StayC J getting fucked silly while drunk at a frat party in her freshman year of college. Going to a party to try and meet people but ended up drinking way too much and passed out in a random bedroom. The reader finds her passed out and decides to take advantage of her tight body.

❎ 18. Taeyeon

A/N Plot: Write on MILF Taeyeon, please. And preferably noncon.

❎ 19. Sakura

A/N plot: PLEASE DO A MIYAWAKI SAKURA FIC 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

❎ 20. Miyeon

A/N plot: Miyeon, please make non-con of Miyeon. Her big boobs are such a tease recently.

❎ 21. Ahn Yujin

Plot: You are "fixing" her transmitter pack for the in-ear monitor. She is still within visual range of the VIP crowd for the sound check but what you're doing is conveniently hidden from her shadows. That's when you unzip and non-con her from behind.

❎ 22. Karina

Plot: Karina offers herself to sponsors to save her team members from the ordeal. But then she got brutally gangbanged at a private party, all her holes abused to the point that she started to question the life choices that made her into an idol, aka rich people's expensive fuck doll. Her only solace is she saved her sisters, but how long that is the question.

This blog will be occasionally updated!

#to do list #weekly

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coffeetank · 2 months

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Build CHARACTERS!

Every time you write a book, you're creating a journey for your reader. Your main characters are the medium through which this journey is carried out. Your readers see the events in the book through your characters' eyes. Thus, it's very important to have characters that feel human, even though they might not be (if you're talking fantasy).

Now, of course, if your writing fantasy and your character is a dragon or some mythical fox, they won't act the way a human would. But that's the best part about making characters, you can give them layers. No matter the circumstance, every character will have a way of responding or reacting to it. That's where your characterisation comes in.

Here are a few things I do to make my characters, well characters:

1. MORAL CODE:

Your characters, regardless the genre, are the immediate connection to your readers. Fantasy or not, they'll be carrying the story. So they need to have a set of values that they follow. When you're affixing a moral code to your characters, first take an example setting. Suppose, you've created a character named A. Let's say A is a man and a detective by profession. Now let the main event of your story be a case of murder. Obviously, there's going to be an investigation. Let your detective (A) find out that the victim, who is a woman, was a sex worker. After the victim's body comes back from a forensic search, let there be signs of sexual assault. Now conventionally, as a detective, A is supposed to jump into action and go above and beyond to find the culprit and bring justice. But here is where you can add a characteristic that isn't conventional. Even though A is a detective, make him look down on sex workers. That would mean that A believes that the victim probably 'asked' for whatever happened to her. Your character needs to have a moral code so that they can ignite some sort of feelings in your readers. This moral code further also revs the whole process of character development. In a nutshell, a moral code is a set of beliefs that your character has which can either be agreeable, or questionable, or both. We call them the white zone (virtuous/agreeable), the black zone (evil/questionable) and the infamous morally grey zone (both).

2. OPPOSING QUALITIES:

This is by far the most interesting advice I have ever received. Opposing qualities are actually simple – it's one quality (that's good) and it's inverse (which is a flaw). What you do here is, you give your characters a good/admirable quality and then you give them flaws based on those specific good traits. Some of these that I have used are:-

helpful :: people-pleaser (you character helps others but at the same time seeks validation from others, thus only helps people who validate them)

confident :: cocky (you're character is confident, but they often come off as cocky in situations requiring humility)

perfectionist :: obsessive (are they a perfectionist or are they just obsessed with having things go their way only?)

supportive :: nosey (sure, they support all their friends, but they also tend to poke their nose into everything which makes them ignore or overlook people's boundaries)

straightforward :: rude (they are straightforward and don't shy away from speaking their mind which is good; however, they end up saying things which could be harsh or hurtful)

reserved :: unfriendly (character can be introverted and reserved too, but sometimes they get away with being outright hostile all in the name of their introvertism)

protective :: possessive/controlling (this is easy to confuse as both parties involve an exceptional amount of care for their loved ones, but ask yourself - are protective and possessive really the same?)

practical :: ignorant (one of my favourites; is your character just level-headed about stuff? or are they just heedless to others' emotions?)

There's so much more you can do with this one! Use as many traits and their inverses as you wish! This tip really helps a lot (speaking with experience)!

3. BACKSTORY:

Probably the most important part of making a character. Everyone has a backstory. You. Me. Most importantly, your character. Backstories as just significant events that alter the mindset of your character. It can range from something minimal to something grave. It could be a cup of coffee or it could be a traumatic experience. The experience could be personal or they could have been an observer; anything works as long as it affects them and hits their weak spot.

The following questions are important to frame a backstory:

• how does your character think?

• what is their moral code? are they in the black zone, the white zone, or the grey zone?

• what are their emotional fears? how do they deal with them?

• what is their level of emotional maturity? do they have any form of issues (trust, attachment, etc)?

• how was their childhood? how were the parents? how were the sibling, the relatives or family friends?

• was their school/college life good? did they have any life-altering experiences?

• what kind of friend circle do they have?

Answering these questions will help you get to know your character even better. Thus, making it easier for you to create your character for your readers.

4. THEIR EMOTIONAL ENVIRONMENT:

Your character has a family, or doesn't. Maybe they're an orphan, or grew up in a foster home. Evaluate what type of effect that may have on your character. Was the foster family abusive thus making your character too shy and timid? Or was life as an orphan so difficult that they learnt to be hyper-independent?

Include their friend circle in this. What type of friends do they have? Are they friends with the good kids? Or the bad kids? Or is it a mixed group? If it's a mixed group, then further focus on how the differences in opinions has an influence on your character. Use your character's emotional surrounding to build their functioning.

If you've come this far, thank you! Do let me know if these tips seem helpful/have helped you!

- Ashlee.

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evilwickedme · 11 months

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I just. Ugh. Oh my God. The fucking PARALLELS this season of Good Omens. Y'all know I'm an absolute fool for a good parallel, so to get so many? I'm so well fed today

Crowley and Azira are like, the definition of soulmates of the kind that are made, you know? Like there is no one single other being in the whole of Creation that shares even a fraction of the same experiences. Six thousand years in the making, this ship is - even more according to this season !!! And YET, they are absolutely brand new. They've never been in a romantic relationship - not with each other, not with anyone - and as Crowley pointed out, they've essentially just gotten out of toxic relationships with Heaven and Hell. Except like, not really? Because we see Crowley really got out Heaven so heavily traumatized he never really put all that much stock into Hell. Yeah, Hell might've still been abusive, but Crowley was halfway out the door the whole time. Azira, tho... He still buys into all of it. He's technically out the door, but he hasn't done any of the deprogramming you need to do in order to move on (I feel like I'm mixing my metaphors a little by using cult-related languages, but also abusive relationships are essentially two person cults, so)

And this season sets this dynamic up so perfectly with Nina and Maggie!!!!! And we're supposed to think that Nina is Crowley because she's dark and broody and Maggie is Azira cause she's frankly precious but really it's the other way around and it's Nina who finishes the season being like "I can't be in a relationship right now because I still need to work on myself having just ended an incredibly toxic relationship" and it's just. Nina and Maggie don't end the season together because that's not what they need right now and bc of that they might still be able to be together later, but Crowley and Azira hold onto each other SO DAMN HARD that they end up losing each other SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE AZIRA CAN'T DO THAT SAME THING OF UNPACKING HIS BASE ASSUMPTIONS it's like leaving a cult cause they were mean to you once but still buying into the new agey stuff they used to love bomb you into joining the cult in the first place

And so that's the relationship part of things but also we've got like soo many parallels showing how broken the system is in the first place and obviously ineffable bureaucracy is what stands out here because of the literal lines coming out of various characters' mouths during this plotline but can we talk about how heavily brainwashed Muriel is and how clearly they're supposed to be exactly like a young Aziraphale, one who doesn't "have" Crowley yet!!! Like tell me that if you gave Muriel a fiery sword and told them to watch over the first ever pregnant couple in history they wouldn't give them that Goddamn sword. Nobody on either side is capable of questioning their position in life without exposure to Something Else, but it doesn't have to be like, the being you're going to run off to alpha centauri with. It could very much be a copy of The Crow Road

(sidenote, has anybody read this book? It seems like an incredibly deliberate choice but I've never heard of it! I think I might send in an ask to Neil Gaiman himself if I don't see any meta soon)

Anyway yeah um. I don't know how to end this. Parallels and shadow selves fuck (double entendre)

#ok I lied I do have Thoughts I just hadn't processed them yet #parallels are like my favorite thing #good omens #good omens 2 #ineffable husbands #ineffable bureaucracy #crowley #aziraphale #good omens spoilers #gail speaks

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thornybubbles · 10 months

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Playing Minecraft with the Stardust Crusaders

**Note: Originally I was going to have this be a story with just Kakyoin, but I decided to add the rest of the Stardust Crusaders. Also I decided to just do headcanons instead of writing a full story. I’ve been writing a lot of dark yandere stuff and I just wanted a break. So here’s something wholesome. PS. Polnareff’s part was my favorite to write. XD **

Joseph

He may be an old man, but he’s not completely out of touch when it comes to the concept of video games. It takes him a little bit to learn how to play, but once he gets the hang of it, there’s no stopping him. Joseph’s building skills are pretty basic. He’s more interested in the survival and exploration elements of Minecraft. Once he gets his house built, he does a little mining to get a full set of iron armor, weapons, and tools and then he’s off to explore. He’s almost never seen around the main base and spends most of his time many, many blocks away, discovering cool things. He will often ask questions about things he’s unfamiliar with and you explain it to him. Sometimes he hardly speaks at all because he’s too enamored with all the stuff he’s discovering.

Then there was the “Creeper Incident”. Joseph made the mistake of doing some exploring at night instead of going to sleep like a good little Minecrafter.

“Hey, what’s this freaky green thing?” he asked you.

“Freaky green thing? What kind of freaky green thing?” you said, wanting some specifics.

“It looks like a depressed cactus,” he explained.

Uh oh.

“Oh! That’s a cr---!”

There was a distant explosion followed by Joseph screaming, “Oh my God! Son of a bitch!!!”

After that, something changed in Joseph’s play style. He went from explorer to monster hunter. Angry at having been blown up and losing all his stuff, he goes on a vendetta to destroy all creepers. And why stop there? Zombies, spiders,skeletons or any other creature of the night that crosses his path were quickly dealt with. He goes deep into learning brewing, armor and weapon enchanting, and anything else he can think of to give him an edge against the hostile mobs. With Avdol’s help he builds a battle tower and protective wall around the base. He has very big dreams about taking out the Ender Dragon.

Joseph is a bit of a jack of all trades when it comes to Minecraft. He may not be the best builder but he has a lot of creative ideas that help all of you with whatever projects you might be working on, especially when it comes to base defense and monster fighting.

Jotaro

He only ever plays when either you or one of the other Crusaders asks him to. When he first spawned in he wasn’t too impressed. He had a hard time figuring out what he wanted to do. At first, he doesn’t bother building a house or anything and just bums around his grandpa’s house. He makes a snide comment about how Joseph’s house is just a big, wooden block with one window and a door. Joseph grumbles something about how his house didn’t need to be pretty, just practical. Joseph ends up being the one to teach Jotaro how to play, while you occasionally interject to mention something Joseph may have forgotten about. Jotaro just responds with non-committal grunts and wanders around the base, checking things out.

Eventually, he goes off on his own to explore and find somewhere nearby to build a house. He hasn’t collected any resources, has no tools, or crafted a weapon of any kind when he starts exploring. You try to warn him that he should at least get a wooden sword to defend himself with, but he ignores you. It isn’t until night comes and he is nearly killed by zombies that he finally decides to get some wood and stone and make some basic tools. He still hasn’t found a decent place to build yet, though.

After he’s wandered around for about 4 in-game days, he comes across a village. Jotaro watches the villagers run around, doing their thing, and is bemused at their silly appearance and sounds. But when nighttime comes and zombies start attacking them, Jotaro feels he’s found his purpose in the game. Somebody has to protect these dumb looking guys and it may as well be him. He teams up with Avdol and Joseph (who is a little miffed that someone found a village before he did) to form a “Village Security Team”. While Avdol fixes the village up by patching holes in walkways, correcting poorly spawned buildings, and starting work on building a monster proof wall around the village, Jotaro and Joseph stay up at night to fight off the monsters.

Eventually, Jotaro builds a massive fortress near the village and Avdol attaches the wall to it. This fortress serves as Jotaro’s home and the village becomes the secondary base for you guys. Joseph jokingly calls him “King JoJo” and “Your Highness” which usually has Jotaro grumbling under his breath. He spends most of his days decorating or improving either the fortress or the village itself. When he’s not doing that, he’s usually tagging along on one of his Grandfather’s adventures.

Kakyoin

The redstone wizard of the group. Noriaki’s beaten the game a few times already, but only recently started messing around with redstone contraptions. He set up an automated farm that both harvests and replants crops as well as a huge mineshaft with minecarts set up so that they returned to the surface to be unloaded whenever players filled them up with resources.

As innovative as he is, though, he often uses his redstone skills to be an absolute troll. And usually, his victim is you. That’s not to say that he hasn’t pranked any of the others yet, it’s just that you’re his favorite target. It’s kinda your fault though. It started back when you first started playing Minecraft together and you might have, possibly, sorta, kinda, completely un-accidentally pilfered a diamond or two from one of his chests. He knew you were the culprit because there wasn’t anyone else in the game at the time but the two of you. He didn’t call you out on it, though, assuming that you would replace the diamonds as soon as you got a chance. You never did. While you actually did have every intention of returning the diamonds to him, you just forgot about it. It didn’t help that you later developed a habit of helping yourself to whatever you found in his chests instead of going out and getting the resources for yourself. Hey, it was easier and it saved time!

Nori never said a word about it, instead opting to quietly plan his revenge. One day you went down into his storage basement to grab some cobblestone from one of his chests. You were only going to grab a stack or two and make a mental note (for the hundredth time) to replace whatever you took, but knowing that you’d probably forget. When you opened the chest, though, you didn’t find any cobblestone. Instead you found yourself staring into the sullen face of a creeper, its warning hiss in your ears. You let out a shriek of terror and braced yourself for the inevitable explosion, but it never came. You examined the “creeper” again only to see that it was nothing more than an armor stand wearing a creeper head and green dyed leather armor. It was inside of a minecart that was cleverly hidden behind the chest. You just stared at it as your brain slowly came to the conclusion that you’d just been pranked.

“Ah, I see you found my theft deterrent.” Noriaki said, amusement clear in his voice. “It’s a nifty little project I found online called the ‘creeper in a box’ prank.”

You can’t even say anything. He got you good and you know it. You made it a point to stay out of his storage basement from then on.

It doesn’t stop there though. That one little incident unleashed Noriaki’s inner troll and you’re the one who gets to suffer for it. From filling your house with dirt blocks to slowly rearranging your decorations over time to see how long it would take for you to notice, Noriaki just seems to love messing with you. You have to admit that while his pranks are annoying, they are pretty funny and too clever for you to really get mad at. Your “favorite” was when he hid a bunch of note blocks under your house and arranged them to play a certain song when you opened the front door.

“Nori, why is my house Rick Rolling me?” you demand of him, annoyed but admittedly amused.

“Why are you asking me?” he says, playing dumb.

He knows what he did.

You eventually do give him his diamonds back in hopes that will appease him. It does… for a little while at least.

Avdol

The master builder. Before being invited to play Minecraft with you guys, he’d never really played a video game before. But there was something about the building mechanics of the game that awakened something within him, possibly nostalgia for those calm times with building blocks when he was a little kid. Whatever the case, Avdol takes to building like a pro and all without any YouTube tutorials, too. You want a medieval style bakery? You got one. Want a modern bungalow? He’ll do it. Giant fire breathing demon chicken to put in the middle of the base? You can envision the weird looks he wants to give you, but he’ll make one of those, no problem. His best projects are the ones he does on his own, though, with no guidance and with minimal suggestions.

Due to his building skills, he finds himself constantly busy within the game as someone always has some kind of building project they want help with. He even offered to improve Joseph’s plain block house. The old man told him to do whatever he pleased and then went off to go treasure hunting with Jotaro and Kakyoin. When Joseph came back he found his simple home had been converted into a deceptively cute cabin. While Joseph was impressed enough with how cozy it looked, Avdol revealed that the cabin had a secret, a well hidden secret chamber that appealed to Joseph's inner superhero fanboy. He had his very own secret lair now (yeah, it’s not really a secret if everybody on the server knows about it, but let the old man dream)!

Over time, Avdol has added things here and there to the base to keep things from looking so plain. He’s added a decorated pond for fishing and just a place to hang out. There’s also a meeting area for when the whole gang gets together right before going on an adventure (brings back bittersweet memories. At least this time there’s no danger of anyone actually dying.).

And yes, he even added that giant fire breathing demon chicken statue you wanted so badly. Your odd tastes aside, Avdol managed to make the abomination of a statue look rather cool and stylized. Kakyoin wants it to be the mascot for your group. It ends up being put on any and all banners for the base, much to Avdol’s chagrin.

Every time he gets online with you guys he is either working on a project or starting another one. He never seems to run out of things to do. Surprisingly, his own home is rather quaint. Just a regular old farm house, but it’s very pretty. And yes, he has a chicken farm.

Polnareff

Chaos incarnate. This man got into the game and immediately started doing everything WRONG! Digging straight down, forgetting to sleep at least once to ward off phantoms, forgetting to crouch when standing at the edge of great heights, you name it he’s messed it up. So basically just Polnareff being Polnareff. He always manages to find danger or danger finds him. Every monster in the area seems to target him specifically. On one mining trip you actually watched around five zombies shamble right past you and head straight for a very startled Polnareff. They completely ignored you! He’s died so many times that you actually put in the “keep inventory” cheat so that at the very least he stops losing all of his hard earned resources.

Speaking of resources, when it comes to mining it’s the one thing that Jean Pierre is really, really lucky at. To the point that it makes everyone else jealous. He was the first to find diamonds and emeralds and the first to manage to get full stacks of both. You never even thought it possible to find 64 emeralds naturally, but Polnareff managed to pull it off. Joseph is quick to accuse him of cheating which results in a very childish argument between the two until you step in and explain that you were with Polnareff the whole time and he just finds diamonds and emeralds by chance. Joseph apologizes but grumbles when Polnareff laughs. Ever since then, whenever he comes across diamonds, or anything even remotely interesting, he is very obnoxious about it.

“HEY GUYS!!! GUESS WHO FOUND EVEN MORE DIAMONDS?!!” he’ll shout in an annoying sing-song voice.

This usually results in annoyed huffs from Avdol and Kakyoin, disgruntled “Good griefs” from Jotaro, not-so-humble requests for him to stop bragging like an asshole from Joseph, and a threat or two from you that if he didn’t stop rubbing your faces in it, you would shove him into the nearest lava pit. This always earns a mischievous giggle or two from him. He’s so full of himself about it. He does make up for it though, when he crafts full sets of diamond armor for you all. For all his arrogant bragging, he’s really rather generous with his finds. If any of you need diamonds or emeralds he’s the first to offer up his stash. After all, he has so many, why shouldn’t he share? ~ ❤

Whenever he goes mining, you usually tag along. You say that it’s so you can help him carry his loot, but actually it’s because you’re his self appointed babysitter. Just like in real life, it just isn’t a good idea for him to run off by himself. You never say that out loud though because you know how sensitive he is about being danger-prone. Besides he likes having you along and the two of you end up as mining buddies almost every time you play. Sometimes Kakyoin joins you as he’s always in need of redstone and other materials for his contraptions (it’s important to note that Polnareff is Kakyoin’s second favorite trolling victim and it always makes you nervous whenever he tags along because you never know if he’s up to something or just genuinely wants to collect resources.).

Whenever you and Polnareff go off on your own to do anything, the rest of the Crusaders server prepares their poor ears for the inevitable screaming and swearing that will follow. Something happens to you whenever you pair up with Polnareff. Your brain power seems to get cut in half and the two of you end up becoming an unintentional comedy duo that has everyone else either laughing or, in Jotaro’s case, muting you for being “too damn loud”.

There was one time that Polnereff was digging a strip mine that ended up leading right into the Deep Dark and the Warden’s territory. You can probably guess what happened. Before you could warn him, Polnareff’s antics end up summoning the Warden and the monster kills you both before either of you have a chance to panic. This results in Polnareff seeking revenge (or trying to) and going all the way back to the Deep Dark to fight the Warden again (and dragging you along each time), and (both of you) dying again. This happens about three more times before he actually manages to defeat the Warden only to find out that he doesn’t get any kind of reward for it (other than bragging rights, which believe me, he takes advantage of).

On a minor note, Polnareff’s inventory is always extremely unorganized. Whether referring to his personal inventory or his storage chests his inventory is in shambles. There’s no rhyme or reason for where he places things in his hotbar and sometimes he’ll end up hitting monsters with a stick or block of glass rather than his sword. He also has a bad habit of using the wrong tool for certain jobs, such as using his pickaxe on dirt instead of his shovel and it drives more organized players like Kakyoin and Avdol insane.

BONUS:

Iggy

(We’re assuming that the little gremlin lives with you) While he can’t exactly play video games for obvious reasons, he does kinda like watching you play, but that’s only if he’s not trying to take a nap (you’re kinda noisy). Most of the time he just plops down in his comfy spot and watches you struggle to survive in what he mentally calls the “stupid human block game”. He is really amused whenever you and Polnareff team up because watching you two together is comedy gold. Sometimes, when you’re playing alone, he’ll wait for you to be exploring a dark, creepy cave and suddenly bark very loudly for no reason, causing you to very nearly jump out of your skin.

Iggy: “BARK!”

You scream, swear, and jump back so hard that your headset falls off. Your mouse has been practically thrown across the room. You turn around and glare at the little brat.

“IGGY!” you shout accusingly.

The cheeky little doggo runs out of the room making sounds that can be interpreted as the canine equivalent of snickering.

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