#dont try to talk to me abt the other series i dont know shit about them
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these guys am i right
#sorryhaving a tos moment rn#oops!#star trek#star trek tos#spock#captain kirk#leonard mccoy#james t kirk#jim kirk#mr spock#dont try to talk to me abt the other series i dont know shit about them#i saw the reboot movie like when it came out i dont remember anything except a handful of visuals#star trek fanart#i have like two other color variations idk maybe ill put em on my ko-fi
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GETAWAY CAR — rockstar!e.m. x f!reader
CHAPTER SEVEN: SHE'S THUNDERSTORMS
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✦ summary: in which corroded coffin performs at the hideout (wc: 9.3k+)
✦ warnings — angst, ANGST, arguments, FINALLY SOME DESERVED FLUFF, jealousy, jealous!menace!eddie, the kiddos make an appearance!!!, uhmm kissing,,, eddie and p are an old married couple, drinking, smoking/weed, uhm thats it i think.
✦ pairings — rockstar!eddie munson x fem!reader, past billy hargrove x fem!reader
✦ authors note — not proof-read i tried but i cant do it. pls ignore all mistakes. SO VERY SORRY FOR THE WAIT. hopefully this makes up for it. as usual the song is by arctic monkeys, and the other song mentioned is lover you should've come over by jeff buckley. but we'll pretend like its all by corroded coffin so shshsh.
anyway ily all pls interact + like + reblog to support me! i'd also LOVE LOVE to chat about anything abt this series it literally is my baby!! pls dont hesitate to send me an ask about anything mwah thank you for reading💗
series masterlist | series playlist
“Dude, I’m telling you it was not my fault.” Gareth exasperated desperately, hands up in the air in defeat.
But Eddie was quick to shake his head, “You drove her here, how is it not your fucking fault, Gareth?” He spat, bitter and angry.
“She insisted! She wants to apologize to Pinky!”
“What?” Confusion etched across Eddie’s face.
With an annoyed sigh, “Yeah, the whole fuckin’ world has to revolve around her,” Gareth muttered under his breath, knowing that saying anything about you would drive Eddie crazy.
“Watch it,” Eddie warned, mouth downturned in disgust almost immediately.
“What? It’s the truth.”
“Gareth, I’m not gonna tell you this a second fuckin’ time, okay? Don’t do that shit around me and never say one fucking word about her again, you got that?” He gritted through his teeth, his hand unintentionally clenching into a fist.
“Jesus Christ.”
“I mean it,” Eddie spat.
“Fine, fine!” Gareth threw his hands up in defeat, both of them downing their drink before scurrying away.
Shit.
You knew you shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, but it wasn’t your fault. You were just trying to get a drink for the group, surfing through the sea of people—which was unusual for The Hideout. Still, you guessed the only celebrity from Hawkins was enough to have people swarming in, and Gareth and Eddie happened to be chatting right behind you.
Even though it stung to hear Gareth talk of you like you were the fucking anti-christ, hearing Eddie defend you like that had that familiar warmth spread through your entire body. And you hated it, you hated the soft spot you’d always have for him, how it would take you back to five years ago when he would be there for you, every single time.
Fucking great, you had so many people to avoid tonight; Chrissy, Gareth, and Eddie.
With a sigh, you quickly disappeared into the crowd, carrying a tray of drinks for everyone. Plopping it on the booth with a slight sloosh.
Everyone reached for it and you were quick to slap away Max, Lucas, and Dustin’s curious hands. “Oh, come on!” Max protested with a groan.
“Not legal,” you hummed with a narrowed gaze. “Yeah, I’m sure you were legal when you were shotgunning beers and smoking joints like it was your lifeline during senior year,” Lucas mumbled under his breath, quick to get settled into his seat with a huff.
You gasped dramatically, “Lucas Sinclair!” Exclaiming as he gave you a simple shrug.
“So what’s new with you and Mr. Rockstar, now?” He teased, and you narrowed your gaze at Max who snickered underneath her hand.
“Nothing,” You mumbled, shying away from everyone’s gaze on you.
“Good thing, we can always ask the other party, too,” Dustin chimed in with a smirk, head pointing toward behind you.
There was a slow tap on your shoulder and you were quick to jerk your body around.
Of course.
Eddie.
His soft gaze was dumbly addicting, that boyish grin curled deliciously on his lips while amber eyes took you in wholly.
His gaze wandered to your figure, the midnight blue dress embracing your figure, accentuating your curves, its hem grazed against your mid-thigh, allowing him to get a glimpse of your sun-kissed legs, simple but exuding how breathtakingly pretty you were.
He couldn’t place why your brows were so tightly pinched together, or why your arms were crossed against your chest, plump lips downturned with a pout. Still, you looked so pretty, so alluring that he could barely form any sentence.
Mind captured entirely by you, almost feeling paralyzed while he took you in.
“H—hey!” He stammered, awkwardly putting his hands in the back pocket of his chained black jeans. He was just him, and oh, god, you were you.
Plush lips that curled into the prettiest smile, the most captivating eyes, even when you seemingly looked upset, brows pinched together, those glossy lips downturned, you were perfect.
You ignored Eddie’s greeting, your piercing glare was still not that noticeable to him, all he could think about was how beautiful you looked, and how he was glad that he saw you before his set. He wanted nothing more than to see you watching him perform the songs he wrote all about you.
“Wow… Uhh—you look… amazing,” He mumbled, breath getting hitched on his throat when he saw your unreadable expression.
And all you could do was give him a tight-lipped smile. Almost immediately wiping that glow off of his face, face going momentarily blank.
But he should’ve expected this, he knew you wouldn’t jump into his arms at any opportunity, he deserved this. He needed to do more, he needed to win you back.
He opened his mouth to speak, desperate, needing your approval, but you interrupted. “I—I’m going to get a drink,” you mumbled, face flushed with heat, you didn’t know how to act either.
Eddie glanced over at the tray of drinks on the booth, with his head tilted, “there’s a bunch of drinks over there,” he mumbled, he didn’t want you to leave.
“I can see that, but I still want my own,” you sassed with a narrowed gaze, not letting him talk back once you left to go to the bar.
Eddie watched your figure leave with a deep sigh, turning to the booth to take one of the drinks. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?”
“Yup,” Steve muttered with a nod, and Eddie was quick to give him a death glare.
“So, will you finally enlighten us on what happened with you and Mrs. Grumpy over there?” Dustin huffed impatiently, grabbing three drinks from the tray now that you were gone, handing the other two to Max and Lucas with a grin.
“She didn’t tell you guys?”
“No! Which is a shame because she usually can’t say no to my adorable face.” Dustin blinked quickly, batting his eyelashes while Eddie shook his head at him with a chuckle.
“Oh c’mon, Eddie, just tell us!” Max let out an impatient huff, her captivating icy blue gaze was pleading in a way that he could never say no to.
These doofuses would always be his weakness.
“Yeah, Eddie, pretty please?” Lucas added exaggeratedly, mocking Max as she hit him in the chest playfully.
“Fine, fine!” He sighed, running his hand over his forehead in frustration.
“But nothing really happened and I don’t think it’s—” When he felt everyone’s gaze piercing through him, he was quick to shut up. “Okay, okay!” He huffed.
“She came to my trailer guns ablaze and then just slammed the note against my chest, calling me a coward, and then I told her off—”
“Wait what?” Max was quick to interrupt him, brows pinching together.
“Yeah, I told her I wasn’t the one who left.”
“Uh, I’m sorry, didn’t you kiss Chrissy in front of her?” Max taunted.
“Yeah, and did you not bring her to Steve’s?” Dustin added.
With a huff, he turned back to Steve. “Jesus, Harrington, did you gang up all of them against me?” He just gave Eddie a shrug.
“That’s not even the point! Everything has just become too convoluted with us,” He spat, anger returning quicker than you intended to, while the rest of the gang sipped their drinks with an ‘oof’.
“It’s not convoluted, just tell her how you feel!” Max inquired, gently, almost like she was trying not to tip him off.
“I—” He took a deep breath. I will. He wished to say, but saying it out loud felt too real. And you were right, he was a coward.
“I’m gonna properly apologize and make things right by her,” he muttered, taking a big sip from his drink.
“You better hurry up, rockstar,” Steve taunted smugly, the weird face he pulled was making crinkles appear on Eddie’s forehead.
Eddie’s head cocked toward Steve, aggressively. “You better tell her how sorry you fucking are.”
With an all-knowing snort, Steve’s finger accusingly pointed towards something behind him. “Or someone else might swoop in.”
“Fuck off, Harrington,” Eddie mumbled, rolling his eyes before he turned around with a huff.
Oh, shit.
Everyone’s gaze turned toward Steve’s accusatory finger, a slight ‘shit’ escaping from Robin’s lips which Nancy elbowed gently to shut her up.
Eddie could barely move, his entire face feeling hot and jaw clenching involuntarily, jealousy shooting through him faster than the alcohol swimming in his system.
Because there you stood, in front of the bar, with your head tilted sideways, a pretty grin sitting on your lips, mellow gaze looking up at the guy in front of you—dirty blonde, hair cut shorter than Eddie’s but almost as long as Steve’s, wearing the most expensive and tidy outfit Eddie had ever seen—making him feel stupid for choosing to wear those black chained jeans.
His scowl was anything but pretty, brows furrowing in a way that made him look like a complex puzzle, eyeing the way this stranger was touching you.
“Oh, isn’t that—” Robin spoke up, and the entire table shushed her because they also realized exactly who that was.
James.
Your ex, not Billy, of course, the other douchebag before Billy.
He really wasn’t much of a douchebag, a genuine, nice guy, and to make matters worse he was a total gentleman; attributes Eddie would never call a typical high school Jock.
The relationship only ended because he went to college one too many states away, the distance getting between the two of you, but Eddie always referred to him as ‘the douchebag’ The jealous feeling sunk into his chest even then.
Rich kid, a jock in high school, older than both of you, someone who had his life together. Everything that Eddie never was. Everything Eddie always wished to be.
But now, seeing you with him made something almost click in Eddie’s head, like he was meant for you as he suited you much better than Eddie ever would.
He could treat you much better than Eddie would, sure Eddie had his name now, the riches he never had back in high school. But he was still just Eddie.
And he was certain James never kissed Chrissy, he’d never fuck up like Eddie did.
He watched the way your eyes lit up when he was animatedly talking, his gentle touch on your arm, the smile that curled on your lips.
What if he asked for your number? What if he wanted to reconnect? What if you said yes? Just because Eddie had been a total fucking idiot and couldn’t see what was right in front of him?
He tried so hard to push the idea of the two of you together back into his mind. To make sure it never left, to make sure it never manifested.
But the way his jaw clenched and the deadly glare burning through both of you showed that he couldn’t.
He was jealous, a type of jealousy that quickly translated into anger, one he could almost feel on his skin, hot and prickling rage stabbing into his body, agonizingly slow, making it harder for him to stay glued there and not do anything the more he eyed the hold James had on you. He was standing too close for Eddie’s liking.
Usually, he’d let this feeling sink back into his mind, take a breather, smoke a couple of cigarettes, and then act like nothing was wrong for the rest of the night while he spent it sulking. Keep that rage caged in his chest, so he could keep his feelings contained.
But he couldn’t do that this time, no. He wasn’t going to be stupid enough to let you slip through his fingers, not again. He was going to fight for you, he was going to show you that you belonged with him.
No matter what Mr. Fancy Pants could offer to you, he needed to tell you how he really felt, he needed to make sure you knew. Because even if he could feel the insecurities jabbing into his brain, he always knew, deep down that there was something there between the two of you. Something always left undiscovered because both of you were cowards.
He couldn’t let that happen again, he wasn’t going to go down without a fight.
“Oh, I get the appeal now,” Max murmured, breaking the silence between everyone, and earning a hard glare from Eddie.
“What? He seems nice, has pretty hair, much better than Steve’s, and that outfit probably cost more than your wedding,” Max spoke bluntly, now earning more than just the hard glare of Eddie, mouth hung open Steve looked offended, Nancy and Jonathan narrowed their gaze, but Robin snickered behind her hand, almost giving Max her approval.
“Max!” Lucas reacted before them and Max furrowed her brows, a smirk earning her way to her lips. “You’re still my number one Lucas, don’t worry,” She hummed, pinching Lucas’ cheek and ignoring Dustin’s groan.
“Dude, why would you do that?” Dustin whispered, eyeing Eddie worriedly while nudging Steve by his jacket.
With a dramatic huff, Steve pulled his collar back, “Relax, I know what I’m doing.”
Eddie’s fingertips absentmindedly traced the rim of the glass in front of him, his eyes never leaving the two of you when he downed the drink, slamming it back on the booth, making everyone flinch.
“I’ll be right back,” Eddie muttered, a forced chuckle escaping his lips.
“What are you even going to do?” Robin inquired, almost mocking.
A smirk landed on Eddie’s face. “I’m not going down without a fight, Buckley.”
“Not this fucking time,” he hissed, almost all the brows of the gang raising at his determination.
“I’m gonna tell her how I feel, and I’m not letting another douchebag ruin this,” Eddie mumbled, and a dumb smirk was placed on everyone’s face almost too quickly.
He was going for it, and the soap opera was continuing, the gang watched in excitement.
“Was he ever really a doucheba—” Dustin’s worries were quick to die down when he threw him a deadly glare.
Without another word, he stormed off to the side of the bar. Quick, too fucking quickly that it almost gave him a whiplash. He didn’t know what had taken over him, eyes burning the back of their figures as everyone else at the table watched him with a proud look.
But the child-like jealousy he felt within his body was uncontainable, it felt like his face was almost too hot to touch, he was desperate, quite literally.
The tap on James’ shoulder was anything but gentle, making him turn to Eddie with his pair of brows furrowed, and Eddie’s muscles were quick to tense.
His dark gaze only softened when he looked back at you, muscles relaxing, and creased brows returning to their normal form.
The jealousy eased inside of him, not dissipating quite enough, but slowing with one gaze from you.
Back in the booth, with another sip from his drink, Lucas huffed, “Five bucks says they’ll confess by tonight.”
Robin was quick to snort at him, “You’re trusting them too much, kid, Steve’s ‘little push’ might help them,” She mumbled with a roll of her eyes. “But Jesus fucking Christ, just look at her face, she’s going to go off at him. The most they’ll probably do is have another fight, get just a little bit close to talking about their feelings, and then do it all over again.”
Steve, ignoring Robin’s theories, exclaimed with a smirk. “Ten bucks that Pinky will sleep with Eddie tonight!”
“I second that,” Max said with a grin.
“Steve!” Nancy warned with a disapproving tut.
“What?” He huffed.
“They’re kids!”
“We’re nineteen!” Max groaned.
“I turn twenty next month!” Dustin chimed in.
“Still!”
“Fine, fine!” Steve sighed with a glare at Nancy, “Then ten bucks that they’ll kiss tonight!”
“No fucking way.” Robin shook her head.
“Nah, they’ll at least kiss tonight,” Jonathan said with crossed arms.
“Are you guys seriously betting on our friends?” Nancy said with a furrowed brow.
They all nodded vigorously, “Fine,” Nancy muttered.
“Then I second Steve, ten bucks for them sle-kissing.” Nancy corrected herself, earning a wicked grin from Steve.
“Come on!” Robin groaned, dissatisfied by Nancy’s answer.
“I agree with Robin,” said Dustin with a shrug.
“Finally!” Robin exclaimed, hands rubbing together in victory. “Someone with common sense. There’s no way those idiots are going to do anything but fight, just watch her come back here, all fuming about how much she hates Eddie.”
They all shrugged, going back to continue watching the soap opera unravel in front of them.
“James!” Eddie greeted with faux excitement, a grin playing on his lips, amber gaze remaining on you. With your brows creased, ‘What the fuck are you doing?’ you mouthed behind their awkward hug.
He shrugged, and his hands clutched James’ shoulder harshly, making him chuckle awkwardly. “Munson, the man of the hour!” He greeted him with a beaming smile.
He really was too nice for his own good, wasn’t he?
“I’d ask what you were up to, but it seems you’ve been doing just fine, rockstar,” James exclaimed, returning a friendly slap to Eddie on his shoulder—in a much nicer way than Eddie intended with his.
You smiled uncomfortably, your gaze still throwing daggers at Eddie, who was actively avoiding it. “I have to say that last album? Fucking Christ, had it playing over and over again for days.” He beamed again, much to both of your dismay.
That all-knowing smirk on Eddie’s face disappeared, the unexpected compliment seemed to make him uncomfortable, conflicting with the defensive walls he had put up.
“Uhh—thanks man,” he chuckled awkwardly, casting a quick, scrutinizing glance at you, catching the small smirk on your lips.
“What have you been up to?” He asked, curiously, desperate to know what the two of you were talking about, nervous to see if the two of you would do anything more than this.
The confidence in the way James held himself, his slicked hair, his fancy outfits up close, Eddie’s insecurities washed him over once again. Now with that part of his brain convincing him that the two of you would somehow end up together again.
“Oh, you know, I was just in town, got a nice job here, thought I’d stop by to see Corroded Coffin play, been seeing the posters everywhere—great marketing by the way,” He hummed, flashing Eddie a smile.
And Eddie returned a forced one, lips pursed together in annoyance. “and then I thought I’d get a drink, but then I heard this familiar voice next to me, yelling to the guy next to her to fuck off for attempting to steal her drink, and I thought oh that’s Pinky.” Eddie couldn’t help but not keep his gaze on you, studying your features, almost gauging your reaction, trying to nitpick something to fuel his jealousy.
“Been a long time, but I’d never miss this one’s sassy voice and that pretty face,” He mumbled with a sly smirk, making Eddie’s face scrunch and almost making him scoff out loudly.
“Oh, stop it!” You mumbled with a smile, all flattered, and Eddie’s gaze narrowed, jealousy overtaking him again.
“So you two are… reconnecting for the old times' sake, huh?” Eddie asked through gritted teeth and you rolled your eyes at him.
“Eddie—”
With a smile, James turned to you, “I mean I’d love to grab a drink, are you free tomorrow?”
“Ah! I wish I could, but I need to help Nancy out with some wedding stuff.”
“How about next wee—”
“She’s busy,” Eddie interjected quickly.
“Eddie!” You warned with your brows raised, heat rising to your cheeks, what the fuck was he doing?
“Can I just—steal you away for a minute?” Eddie turned to you with his jealous gaze, hand gently having a hold on your arm.
“Oh, sure, man!”
“No!” You and James exclaimed in unison.
James stared at the two of you with his brows furrowed, both of you breathing heavily, an intense gaze connecting the two of you. With a sigh, you followed him out of the crowd, an apologetic smile thrown toward James.
“What the hell are you doing?”
You scoffed, “Me? What the hell are you doing, Eddie?” You snapped, naze garrowing.
“I’m not locking lips with James that’s for sure!”
“Jesus Christ I was not locking lips with—” You halted abruptly, the absurdity of the sentence hitting you like a wave. Taking a moment to breathe, “What are you a child?”
“Well, if pointing out the obvious means I’m a child then so fucking be it!” The words tumbled out of his mouth harshly, almost lost in the din of the bar.
“The obvious? Do I need to remind you that you were the one who kissed Chrissy?” You accused sharply, your anger returning and cutting through Eddie’s jealousy like a knife.
“Look, I—I’m genuinely sorry for that, Pinky, I am. I should’ve never done that, it was a mistake—” His voice strained, getting lost amidst the background clamor, their set was about to start and Eddie could careless.
He took a step closer, but you didn’t budge. “You don’t kiss someone as a mistake, Eddie! You don’t invite them to brunch as a fucking mistake!” You snapped, tone a poignant mix of bitterness, jealousy, and an equal amount of hurt. Teary yet ablaze gaze bored into Eddie's, breaking his heart more and more.
His shoulders sagged under the weight of your words, the realization of the irreparable damage sinking in.
He took a step closer, a desperate attempt to bridge the emotional gap.“Will you just listen to me?” Eddie's plea hung in the air, the room seemingly shrinking as you and Eddie’s gaze connected. Your breaths mingled, heavy with unspoken words that pulsed between you.
Only inches apart, and you couldn’t help it when your gaze drooped down to his lips, then back to his mellow eyes.
“Eddie, this is the fifth fucking time they’ve been calling you.” Gareth’s irritating voice snapped the conversation, loud enough to have you almost jump back, as you threw Gareth a daggering gaze.
“Just fucking wait for a second,” Eddie spat, trying to dismiss him, but the moment was gone.
And Gareth wasn’t having it. “No way, dude we go on in like five minutes,” He scoffed, momentarily dragging Eddie by his arm.
“Fine, fine!” Eddie scowled, shaking off the hold.
“You should uh— go.”
“Let me explain,” He almost begged, desperate.
But with another dismissal, you left.
Eddie wanted to drop everything and run to you, apologize, tell you what he felt, but somehow, some way he was always managing to fuck up the things between the two of you, now.
It was like he was fourteen again, his dad letting him know that he always managed to fuck up something good, that he was destined to the Munson name. Like he could never manage to do something right.
Wayne, Jonathan, Corroded Coffin, and Nancy all changed that belief.
But, you? Oh, god, you made him believe that he was good, you pulled him out of that darkness, you were the first one to believe in him, you were the one who encouraged him. You made him feel like he was on the right path, always.
And you were the one who mattered, if he didn’t have you believing that now, what else did he have?
With a hand on his shoulder, Jeff was dragging him back, he stared at your figure leaving, and with a sigh, he headed backstage.
-
Aurora was the fifth song they sang, and it should’ve gotten to you, the way his gaze didn’t leave yours, how vulnerable he sounded, the way he barely even made eye contact with the guitar he was supposed to be focusing on, that should’ve gotten to you.
But it didn’t.
Your glossy gaze and your crossed arms, as everyone else around you cheered for him, did nothing but upset you more and more.
Everything was so confusing that you couldn’t even make sense of yourself anymore. Yes, you were mad about everything with Chrissy, but you also knew he didn’t know everything that transpired between you and her.
Chrissy and Billy should’ve been enough for him to not want anything to do with her, yet you still believed him when he told you it was a mistake, that he would’ve never done it if he knew. And the pool… the things he said in the car. Hours ago when you went to his trailer.
Sure, he was sorry, and he said he’d prove himself to you.
But none of you ever out loud said anything, it had always been a cowardice dance around your feelings, and you were afraid that if this dance ended, then it would be all too real. It would all be over.
A heave of breath exited your lips, attempting to drown away the worries, but they were spiked up the second the song ended and Eddie spoke up again.
“This next song is for my friends over there, Nancy and Jonathan,” He exclaimed with a grin, finger excitedly pointing towards the two of them, it was the first time his gaze had left yours, involuntarily your head turned to your right.
“They’re getting married this weekend, and were kind enough to let me and my dipshit friends play,” He said with a sheepish grin, and Nancy and Jonathan shyly smiled at him, waving him off in a dismissive way,
“So this is for the soon-to-be newlywed couple, and for the special girl next to them, who’s mad at me for a lot of reasons, and she has every right to be, I was a total ass.” He earned chuckles and some cheering from the crowd, who unintentionally all faced you.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart, but hey, maybe this might help my case, huh?” He said with a grin, his gaze was dangerously addicting, full of promises, and you couldn’t help the way it made stupid butterflies appear in your stomach.
It was so easy for him to get you like this, you were starting to feel pathetic.
Speechless, and the heat quick to rise to your cheeks, you were trying to ignore the whispers and stares from the crowd, but it was basically impossible.
The opening chords were enough to rattle your memory, the dreamy guitar riffs from Eddie sweeping in echoing the space as if it was just the two of you.
You knew exactly which song he was playing.
And the vocals, added with Eddie’s smooth, sultry voice were enough to have your heartbeat raising making you almost feel small, haziness overtaking your mind.
And it only brought back one memory to your mind.
FIVE YEARS AGO.
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA.
Another job interview, another opportunity you feel like you have missed.
It hadn’t been long since the two of you had arrived in Los Angeles, yet every passing minute felt like you had been wasting away your time, you needed a job, and no one in stupid LA was hiring you.
A groan escaped your lips when you plopped yourself onto the couch, right next to Eddie who was way too into scribbling something into a notebook.
Wait… was he using the…?
“Is that… the notebook?” Your eyes lit up happily. It was such a small, stupid thing.
But for you, it was important. That notebook was important. And you never actually thought he’d care about it, but it looked like he was carrying it in his back pocket.
“Is that a crime?” Eddie sassed.
With a scoff, you narrowed your gaze. “No, doofus! I just didn’t think you’d actually use it.”
Almost taken aback Eddie sat up straight on the couch, knees brushing against yours now. “Are you kidding? Half of this bad boy is filled with lyrics.”
“What is the other half made of?” You asked with a dangerous grin.
“You’d have to kill me to find out.” Eddie enunciated dramatically, tone drooping lower to mimic mystery.
“Oh, come on!” You huffed, curiosity getting the best of you. Scooting closer to him, you pouted. “Can’t you at least give me something?” You asked, all doe-eyed, tone sticky sweet, in a way that always got to Eddie.
“Oh, sweetheart,” He groaned, almost melting into you, “You know I’ll give you anything if you ask that sweetly.”
You grinned happily, clapping your hands together in victory once he ripped up a page and handed it to you.
“That is the chorus of a song I’m working on,” He mumbled, eyes nervously following you, waiting to read your reaction.
She's thunderstorms
Lying on her front, up against the wall
She's thunderstorms
Your eyes blinked quickly to process everything. It had been not too long since the both of you had come to L.A., Eddie was desperately trying to send the band’s best material to any label who was willing to sign them.
And you had just gotten out of a horrible relationship, things had not been steady enough for the two of you to ever discuss anything about your feelings, always tip-toeing around it, but too scared to ever actually delve into it.
Yet, you could tell this was about you, something about being described as thunderstorms stuck to your mind, maybe he somehow meant it as good. But all it reminded you of was destruction. And he wasn’t wrong.
It was like everywhere you went, something horrible followed, exactly like a dark cloud looming over, waiting to strike anyone daring to be near you.
Your hand flew to your mouth, teeth grazing through your nails anxiously. “Who’s this thunderstorm girl?” You asked, masking your nervousness with a brittle smile.
He snatched the notebook back, ignoring your little huff. “Someone I went to school with,” He answered cooly and then leaned further into your face with a grin. “I was drivin’ around one day, then saw this girl’s car on the side of the road, to be nice I helped fix her car but then she became totally obsessed with me.” He recalled the first time he met you, animatedly.
“Oh, is that so?”
“Yeah, didn’t leave me alone for years.”
With a narrowed gaze, “Asshole,” you bantered.
“That’s so weird,” He hummed with a smirk “That was her favorite nickname for me,” quipped Eddie and you stuck your tongue at him childishly.
With a slight push on his elbow, he drew closer to you. “So… what did you think?” He coaxed nervously, you could tell it was important to him, yet being this close was making your mind spin.
“I like it,” you muttered, unable to face his beautiful features when he was so close, and your mind spinning with the fact that Eddie thought of you as destructive, too.
“That’s it? You… just like it?”
“No that’s not it, it’s just—” With a sigh you snatched back the notebook from his hands. “It’s just… isn’t this bad?”
“What?” His brows creased together in worry, “W-which one did you not like I can change it-” You shook your head, interrupting his anxious ramble.
“No! I love all of them! But describing… uh—this girl,” Tip-toeing around it, causing Eddie to smirk. “As thunderstorms? Isn’t that bad?”
“No, not at all. It’s a metaphor.” He shook his head, explaining gently.
“She embodies the essence of thunderstorms—unpredictable and explosive. She has the power to create chaos and destruction, and on the surface that might sound bad, yet within that destruction she sparks a new life. You know, making it so much better,” He hummed, licking his lips.
“And she also feels like a thunderstorm, intense and electrifying, shaking up your life, in the best way possible.”
“Oh. Wow,” You mumbled, gaze turning mellow with how well he explained everything, heart melting with how he saw you, not just from the surface, like he could peel the intricate layers of your existence, appreciating every part of it.
“Uhh, then I love that actually,” you concluded with a smile, attempting to mask the fluttering in your stomach. Did he really see you in that way?
Did he really see you as someone worth all of this? You tried to ignore the tears prickling in your eyes, begging to pour out, but you weren’t going to ruin this moment.
You didn’t deserve him. In the slightest. He didn’t deserve to get caught up in your bullshit. You shouldn’t have dragged him here. You were being selfish, but, god, did it feel good.
To finally feel safe, to finally have someone take care of you, to finally have someone you could rely on. After everything, didn’t you at least deserve to be a little selfish?
But that feeling ate away at you, even though you shook it off for the moment, it was eventually going to return. And it did.
“You do?” His brows raised in surprise, it made you want to fuck all and just grab his cheeks and kiss him, lips plush together until the two of you couldn’t breathe.
But you couldn’t afford that, you couldn’t afford the feelings, nor could you afford the fallout. You couldn’t lose him.
“Mhmm,” You answered with a broken smile, hoping he wouldn’t notice. He always did.
“She sounds special.”
“She is,” Eddie agreed, eyeing you with a worried look. “Very, very special,” He repeated, he could tell something was off.
But it was okay, because he was here for you now, and he wasn’t going to leave.
NOW:
Suddenly the room felt suffocating.
Eddie’s gaze on you felt mocking.
It was stupid, he had just dedicated the song to you, yet all your mind could focus on was everything bad that had happened. Ruining everything good that happened with him.
How were you even going to be with him if you couldn’t even handle this?
Fear, trust issues, being afraid of not knowing how things were going to go, if you would fuck this up too, then that was it for you. No one else could compare, and you knew that.
Maybe if you just knew that the same went for Eddie, if you just could see that the five years you spent apart had been just as hell-ish for him if not more. The constant thoughts in his mind reminded him that he could never be over you, truly. Sure, it hurt less now, but the scar was still there, scabbing the second someone mentioned you. The realization of knowing no one could ever be you etched onto his skin.
“Hey… you okay?” Steve’s concerned voice snapped you out of your thoughts, Eddie’s voice served as a background noise while his gaze was still stuck on you.
“Y-yeah, I just—” You faltered, face growing numb and anxiety increasing when you suddenly needed some air.
Too much, all of it was too much.
Eddie could almost sense it, he grew worried at your frowny brows and your tear-streaked gaze.
“I’ll be right back,” you mumbled, body jerking back scurrying out quickly when you ignored everyone calling out for your name.
Eddie’s vocals almost halted, missing a few notes on the guitar before Gareth was quick to snap him back to it.
His head cocked toward your direction, desperate, nearly begging to stop the show, but all of them shook their head quickly, and once Eddie turned back to see the look on Jonathan and Nancy’s face, he realized he couldn’t do this to them.
This was his friends' wedding, and he owed this to them. When the song ended, he was quick to mouth to the others, “After the next song, we’re taking a break.” It wasn’t a request, it was final.
And frankly, the rest of them were too tired out to even argue with a hot-headed Eddie.
“So how is your plan working, dingus?” Robin jeered at Steve.
“Shut up.”
There were a couple more people outside, all leaning against the wall, chuckling while talking over each other loudly, the smoke of their lit cigarettes quick to take over your senses.
With a cough, you leaned further away from them, mind still unraveling what had just happened. You didn’t even know what was happening anymore.
You wanted to smoke, hand itched to reach for the pocket of your jacket and light one to take away your stress, but you could barely breathe as it was right now.
A light tap on your shoulder snapped you away from your thoughts.
Who was it now?
You huffed loudly when your head cocked back.
Fucking great.
Chrissy.
“Oh, Jesus Christ!” You pinched the bridge of your nose in annoyance, this just had to be your luck, your feet picked up quickly, hand quick to reach for the door and go back inside.
“Please, please don’t leave,” She pleaded.
Your hold on the door remained, barely glancing back at her, “Just leave me alone!” You snapped.
“I just want to apologize, please, then I’ll leave you alone, forever.”
“Please, just five minutes.”
You shouldn’t, you really shouldn’t.
Your hold on the door faltered, and with a deep sigh, you turned to her. “Fine.”
“Five minutes,” You warned, your patience already wearing thin.
Her face lit up, blinking a few times to make sure she heard you correctly. “O-oh, okay, good,” She cleared her throat.
“First of all, I’m sorry, for everything, for what I said five years ago, for what I did with Billy, for using what he did to you like a fucking joke. For w-what I said about your parents.” She stammered.
“It’s too late, I know, I fucked up, I shouldn’t have done any of those things, you didn’t deserve it. You deserved a better friend, someone like you.” She almost looked at you like she was waiting for your approval, gauging your reaction, your expressionless face encouraged her to continue.
“I was bitter, jealous. Which isn’t a fucking excuse, I know, I was just—” she took a deep breath. “You were everything I wanted to be, careless, had all the boys' attention, and you didn’t even have to try, you didn’t have to do anything, and they’d just fall at your feet. And I was stupid, bitter, and insecure enough to envy that.”
“That’s not my problem, Chrissy.” You spat out with your gaze narrowing, you couldn’t handle her pity party right now.
“And really, you wanted to be me? Chrissy I didn’t have parents, my boyfriend was a narcissistic asshole.I was broke.” You scoffed with an ironic chuckle, shaking your head in anger.
“I know, I know. It was stupid, and I was stupid, and you didn’t deserve any of that.” Sincerity. Something you haven’t seen from her in years.
“I just wanted to tell you that none of it was your fault.” Now your gaze narrowed, a chuckle rolling on your lips.
You opened your mouth to speak, to protest. “No, I know you’re going to say you didn’t think that but I know you do. Even though you hate me, which I don’t blame you, I know you like the back of my hand, you blame yourself, you always did it. And I’m telling you shouldn’t because it was all my fault. A-and I shouldn’t have done whatever I did with Eddie, I practically took advantage of him like he did to me and then got mad at him, oh god, I’m such a fucking bitch, aren’t I?”
Your eyes blinked quickly to process all of it. Her apology didn’t mean anything, her words didn’t mean anything. But deep down, you knew she was right, even if you wouldn’t admit it. Because you spent many nights blaming yourself, for even opening up to them in the first place.
“First of all, breathe,” you mumbled with annoyance.
“Second of all, yes you are,” you huffed.
“And, taking advantage? What do you mean?”
“Some fucked up part of me wanted him because I knew you wanted him back then, a-and he was right there and he was being nice to me and—” Chrissy took a deep sigh, big blue eyes staring into you knowing that you were not going to like what she was going to say.
“I should’ve known.”
With puckered brows, you crossed your arms against your chest. “Known what?”
“That he was still hung up on you,” she muttered.
You were quick to roll your eyes, “Chrissy—”
“No, no just listen.” But she wasn’t going to let you spiral.
“Look you were dumb enough then—” You threw her a glare, so daggeringly cold that she stopped.
“Sorry,” she muttered before continuing, “Look, the two of you wasted a lot of time. And I know it’s funny hearing this from me because I took part in it, but I’m only saying this because he’s a nice guy, even though I don’t particularly like him right now, he’s a nice guy, and you deserve someone like him.” She enunciated, azure hues embodying such sympathy that had you taken aback.
“You loved him back then, too. I could see it, and I could see it in him, too. That’s what I always wanted, and maybe that’s why he intrigued me so much. But I knew he never got over you.”
You could feel your heart skip a beat, it wasn’t anything new, but hearing this from her, it meant something.
You needed to take control of your feelings, and hearing Chrissy’s words was doing nothing but fuel them more. “Chrissy stop—”
“No, Pinky! He told me! He told me it was you! It had always been you!” She exclaimed, her face growing a nice pink color as you stood frozen.
Your brain felt mushy, rest of your body felt so warm, but still that anger lingered. Why couldn’t he just tell you this? Why couldn’t he just show you?
“What?” You mumbled, brows pinched together.
“Yes!” She exclaimed, sighing at your reaction.
“Look, I just wanted to tell you this, and tell you to get your head out of your ass. I know I’m the last person you wanted to hear this from, but I had to at least make one thing right for you because I know I fucked up every other thing.”
You wanted to tell her to stay the fuck out of it, you wanted to tell her it was all because of her. That she basically ruined your life. But it wasn’t true. It wasn’t all her, it was Billy, too. It wasn’t all her, Eddie played a part in it, too.
But you weren’t going to waste your breath, you didn’t need to blow up in her face for her to know she was wrong, she needed to let that feeling sink in. You weren’t going to forgive her, and you didn’t need to make a fuss about it to feel real.
This was it. A closure.
“I’m sorry, for everything. And I know that you won’t forgive me, but that’s okay. I’m sorry, but please listen to what I just said. Please don’t get in your head and try to ruin something this perfect, okay?”
A peaceful smile appeared on your lips, and you took a deep breath. “You’re right, I won’t forgive you.” You weren’t going to give her any satisfaction or approval, her words didn’t mean a thing.
“Goodbye, Chrissy.” You mumbled.
You could see her stammering, struggling to open her mouth, because she couldn’t say anything else, and this is what she promised, five minutes. It was over.
You backed yourself against the wall, fingers fishing out the pack of cigarettes sitting in the pocket of your jacket.
Without having anything else left to say, she left. And you heaved a sigh of breath, the tip of your cigarette smoldering when you lit it.
You inhaled with eyes squeezed shut, head swirling with much to think about. But at least you were alone. Finally, some space for you to think, and to lay out a little bit of your stress with the most unhealthy outlet.
And of course, that peace lasted for about a few minutes, just when you had finished your cigarette, squishing the remains on the nearest trashcan, Eddie appeared, lightly squeezing your arm to have your attention.
“What?” You snapped when you saw him, eyeing the way he looked taken aback.
His hands held up in front of his chest in defeat, clearly not understanding your sudden rage. The laughter around you had died, people who were smoking outside the bar were clearly more entertained by your drama.
With a huff, you dragged Eddie away from it all, still close to the bar but far away to not have any other distractions.
He sighed, brows etched with worry. “Why did you leave?”
Your hand flew to your forehead, trying to calm your nerves, trying to clear your mind. “Eddie, are you kidding me?” You scoffed, arms wrapped across your chest defensively. “You can’t just drag me away from James, dedicate songs to me and—”
His forehead puckered. “Why not? They’re all about you anyway,” he said with a sly smirk.
“Aurora, She’s Thunderstorms, Zero, Forget Her, Resolve, Fool, two fucking albums, all dedicated to you, you know that.”
“These notes? These stupid notes I’ve been carrying?” He huffed loudly, hand quick to fish inside of his back pocket, aggressively flipping through the pages. “Even if every nerve in my body were numb I’d still be able to feel her.” He turned the page toward you before flipping again.
“I have tried to forget you but I can’t, you invade my dreams, my mind, my whole fucking life. You’re stuck in me and I don’t have the heart to get you out.” He shook his head, reciting it all like it was nothing, but you felt all of it.
His notes making you dizzy. His words scrambling your mind like never before.
“She’s the tear that hangs inside my soul forever. That one is uh—in a song, too,” he mumbled, cheeks flushing with how passionate he was getting, and you held your breath, it’s like you were staring into his soul.
Stark naked. Laying bare, he really was doing this. And you didn’t want him to stop, even though your mouth suggested otherwise.
“And so much more embarrassing stuff that I don’t want to include to not ruin my chances,” he muttered with a lazy smile, and you hated that you could feel it in your skin, the flutters, stomach flipping in the best possible way.
“All fucking about you. Because it was you, from the moment we met.”
“S—stop,” your mouth betrayed you, it was the furthest thing from the truth, and you needed to hear more. You needed the reassurance, you needed him to convince you. More than anything in the world.
But it was all so scary, and he was so close to you that you could feel his passion integrated into your veins.
“Why, Pinky, why should I stop? Why do we have to tip-toe around each other, huh?” He was desperate, eyes flashing with a newfound of desire for you, he wasn’t going to let it go this time.
And it scared you, him being this determined, getting so close to what you actually felt was making your skin crawl, because the way you could feel your heart thumping against your ribcage wasn’t normal. What he was making you feel wasn’t normal. “Because w—we can’t!”
“We can’t what?” He complained, a deep sigh escaping his lips.
“W—we can’t do this, you can’t—”
He shook his head with his brows puckered. “Who are you to decide that? I want to, I so badly want to,” He spat, taking a step closer to you, face merely inches away from you.
His gaze was dangerously inviting, those alluring amber eyes melted into yours, making your pupils dilate, breath hitching as you struggled to keep him away. “Please, Eddie, d—don’t.”
You gulped, hand raising to put a space between the two of you, but it was impossible. He was in your veins now. “Too much has happened, you with Chrissy and—” You didn’t even know what you were blabbering about, just anything to stop your feelings from getting out.
“Chrissy was a mistake!” He retorted with a hiss. He hated that you saw Chrissy as a problem between the two of you. Yes, he fucked up, but it really was a mistake, he’d take it all back in a heartbeat if he could.
Your gaze narrowed, that pettiness returned when you scoffed. “Which time, when you kissed her or when you brought her to brunch?”
Eddie let out a bitter chuckle, shaking his head when he looked at you with a dumbfounded look. “Jesus fucking Christ…” He took a breather. “I can’t believe you’re doing that again,” he mumbled, realizing that it wasn’t going to be easy to get you out of this mindset.
It was going to be hard, to convince you of anything, and he understood that, he had trust issues himself, but he wasn’t going to back down. This was it.
You crossed your arms against your chest, gaze avoiding him momentarily. “Doing what?” You muttered.
“You just— you get scared when things get serious, running away when it gets just even a little bit too real,” He scoffed, angling closer to you, fingers ruffling through his curls in frustration.
“Excuse me?”
“Yeah! You call me a coward and fucking look at you!” He snapped, hands gesturingly pointing to you.
“Scrambling just at the thought of us being together.” He argued, some part of him feeling a bit insecure, that maybe you didn’t want this. But, no, he saw that glint in your eyes, he knew the little angry twitch on your lips. You felt the same. And all you needed was a little push.
You breathed, mind scrambled and trying so hard to convince yourself to leave. “T—that’s not it, you—uh you just don’t get it!” You complained with a huff.
Another step closer. One more step and his lips would be on yours, Eddie knew this, you knew this. His gaze momentarily drooped down to your lips, then back to your dilated pupils.
“Then make me understand, let me help you, don’t fucking run, not this time.” It was a little jab, but something needed to get you to spill, he was playing all the right cards and you were getting overwhelmed.
“J—just stop!”
“Why? Fucking why? Tell me one good fucking reason as to why we shouldn’t try it, we never even gave it a chance!” He ranted, veins in his forehead popping with how much he was trying to keep it all together. And you weren’t even trying.
“We wouldn’t work, okay?”
He shook his head. “Not good enough,” He argued.
“W—we’re on two different paths now, Eddie.” You didn’t have any good excuses, he was right.
“Not good enough.” Once again, that same arguing tone.
You huffed. “Too much time passed and—”
“Not fucking good enough!” He cursed, hands landing on your shoulder to keep you in place, and your cheeks flushed immediately, while still trying to deny it. You were pathetic.
“Stop being a fucking coward!” He seethed, eyes fiery and red.
Why were you insisting on being so fucking stubborn? You were driving him crazy, yet it wasn’t going to stop him.
Coward is what had you scrambling. Because you knew he was right. “Fuck you,” You spat, body jerking quickly to leave, feet picking up quickly as Eddie groaned loudly.
So. Fucking. Stubborn.
He was quick on his feet, letting curses slip past his lips before he yanked you to him, earning a small gasp from your lips before you finally faced him.
Gaze mellow, but just as fiery, your furrowed brows and dilated pupils only encouraging him more and more. Flutters in your stomach had never left, your skin was burning, everywhere, but specifically on the hold he had on you.
You didn’t manage to utter anything else, you couldn’t because he had you this time. There was no running away from it, your heart was hammering so hard inside of your chest that you were sure he could hear it.
His hold on your arm was firm but somehow gentle, letting you know that he wasn’t going to let you go.
You opened your mouth, wanting to speak, but he interrupted, his hands now firmly cupping your cheeks, squishing you with force, and you couldn’t help the contended sigh that left your parted lips. “I’m not letting you run away, not this time,” He mumbled, words sounding like silk falling from his lips, all you could do was gaze into him. He stood inches away from you, breath fanning against your face.
He licked his lips desperately, gaze drooping to your candy-glossed, needy lips. Face so close that you could feel the desperation radiating off of him. And you shared it. You managed to take a quick breath before his hand fisted your hair and his mouth crashed down to yours.
He pressed you harder against his chest, breathless, your lips molded together, a perfect fit. And he could taste the Cosmopolitan on your tongue, a tinge of alcohol mixed with your sweetness, making his head spin, a taste he realized he’d never have enough of.
Those little thumps your heart did were now out of control, possibly pounding a million beats a second. His small stubble scratched against your chin, rough, it should’ve made you uncomfortable yet all it did was make you kiss him harder, shutting up your brain as your mouth replied to him, kissing him back with just as much force, you melted into him, melted into his hold, and you let him engulf you, fully, completely.
Plushy lips slightly parted apart, his tongue slipped past between your teeth, your hand finding its way to his hair, feeling the curly strands between your fingers, it’s softer than you expected and your lips parted to let out a slight whine as you tugged at them.
All those years of wishing, all those years of wanting, yearning, and needing exploded into this. Kissing like your lives depended on it, chests pressed against each other, Eddie’s hand slipping to your waist, desperately tugging you closer to him as if that was even possible.
Your heart exploded into your chest, his tongue not wavering the chance to explore yours, sucking on it, greedily, desperately.
The background noises disappeared, the cackles of the girls, the booming music coming from inside of the bar, and the honks from the busy street. They ceased to exist and it was just you and him. Feeling each other, completely, fully.
You knew at some point one of you had to pull away, but none of you dared to, it was just pure desire, a hunger that couldn’t be sated.
All the years spent yearning and pining, acting like two fucking idiots.
He wanted to breathe you, drink you in, and he wasn’t intent on letting you go. Ever.
You from five minutes ago who wanted to refuse him, refuse this was an absolute fucking idiot. Gone. You tasted like the sweetest honey and he tasted like everything you wanted and more. It’s even needier than the first kiss, more sure, it’s like a promise.
This is it. Both of you can feel it. This finally changes everything.
final authors note — uhhhh so yeah... if yall wanna talk about that my asks r open LMAO.
#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson series#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson angst#rockstar!eddie munson#rockstar!eddie x reader#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x you#getaway car series#getaway car
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talking abt that one thing in velma thats on my mind a lot for the past few days (that turned into a big incoherent rambling about gay rep in media)
i'm seeing jokes about how the queer representation in mystery inc being so much better than the queer representation in velma and honestly it makes me want to go on a whole tangent about my thoughts on queer representation nowadays vs the more subtle examples decades prior.
There's this weird debate that goes on online about what is "good" queer representation, and one of the most notable and honestly annoying examples is that queer representation has to be so subtle that you could easily miss it/ignore it. i've always hated that take because its a claim mostly said by straight people who are uncomfortable with seeing characters who are openly queer and/or state their identity, but they present it as some sort of push for subtle and nuanced writing. personally i do prefer it when a character just, identifies as how they are without explaining their identity, but that doesn't mean flat out explaining your orientation is inherently bad representation. its why i will always defend the very clunky and awkward high guardian spice scene. it is absolutely poorly directed and written, but that doesn't make it "bad representation". however, I do consider the character who explains that he's trans bad representation because he is flat, uninteresting and very clearly a creator self insert. he doesn't feel like a well rounded character who's also a trans man, but just an incredibly sanitized example of trans representation.
i have many, many issues with helluva boss/hazbin hotel and i do genuinely find some depictions of queer characters just flat out offensive (you can argue with me about how angel dust being written like your average 90s gay stereotype is woke actually because he has trauma, i dont care), but i do admire and appreciate that the series doesn't want to sanitize its queer characters, even if its done poorly. though i could go into a whole rant about how i find it very telling that female characters that are queer are far less sexualized or allowed to be problematic compared to their queer male counterparts.
anyways back to velma. that show does something that i've always found pretty irritating in queer representation which is just this weird lack of faith in its audience. characters can't have a slow burn anymore. internalized thoughts, anger, frustration, longing. you have to immediately know that two characters are gay for each other, even if they're lifelong enemies. its like when modern horror movies open with the gore because they're scared people are going to be bored or leave early. there's no subtlety or chemistry between daphne and velma, they're just lovers because idk, its two girls who hate each other and who doesn't love that.
then i think about how mystery inc handled velma and her sexuality, how she was allowed to be well rounded and nuanced before you slowly realize that "oh, she doesn't like boys". i know her whole thing with shaggy is controversial among fans but i always loved how she does do something pretty unlikable but not immoral. yeah, it is shitty to force shaggy to choose between her and his dog, but i can understand her line of thinking and empathize with her. and i do like how they become friends in the end despite their awkward break up. It's always fun rewatching it and realizing that their incredibly awkward and cringe relationship was meant to be awkward and cringe. it was supposed to be weird and difficult to watch, because those two weren't meant to date each other. you could see how hard velma was trying to make the relationship work despite the fact that you never get the vibe that either character was full invested in it, unlike daphne and fred's relationship.
then you had velma and her relationship with marcie, which started off as sort of a catty rivalry (not full on attempted murder, i mean holy shit hbo velma) that slowly grows to where you're completely convinced that these two did gradually like each other. and i do really enjoy stuff like that, more subtle writing like that. which doesn't just apply to queer rep btw, my favorite ships are relationships that feel understated, something you have to really dig for and pay attention to. its why i consider bubbline the best f/f representation in cartoon. because its subtle, but not too subtle where it feels out of no where when they kiss, and nuanced in ways that enhances the relationship AND characters.
there's a good amount of relationships i see in cartoons where the creator, who is usually queer themselves, often wants to depict queer relationships, but is weirdly adverse to depicting the uglier aspects of that character, and refuses to add subtlety to it. steven universe is a show i've always felt conflicted on its handling of queer representation because on the one hand i appreciate writing lesbians that are messy, traumatized and make constant mistakes. but on the other hand, the show goes out of its way to ignore these issues and/or make excuses for it, making the decision to make these characters messy and complicated genuinely baffling (this is also one of the big issues i have with catradora and stolitz).
it makes me think back to my own work too. i really enjoy making fluffy, easily digestible gay content for my followers and myself because it puts me in a good headspace. But even now and then i like exploring those little nuances too, because i don't really enjoy stories with little conflict. Because of that acknowledgement of how satisfying it is to write fluffy, queer rep, you end up putting yourself in other creator's shoes. you're so used to media that either dehumanizes gay people or tells people that they don't exist that you push yourself to make the most in your face queer rep you can but its at the cost of an interesting and subtle characters. characters that don't really have arcs or places to learn and grow.
With bugtopia i made a joke about how i want some of my queer rep to feel like you're being queerbaited. It's not literal, obviously, but mixed in with characters who are already married and in same gender relationships, i really want to write dynamics that feel subtle enough for a bit of a slow burn. even if you know they're going to end up together, to at least value the characters on their own before centering them on their relationships. queerbaiting is something that deserves all the criticism it can get, but it is embarrassing when queerbaiting feels genuinely more interesting than actual queer rep because queerbaiting has that factor of "maybe they won't get together" that adds that bit of intrigue, vs so many shows that repeatedly hammer in your head "don't worry guys, they're gonna be lesbian lovers".
mystery inc (and many other shows) being forced to keep a relationship obvious while subtle to get through censorship really forced creators to be creative with their storytelling and not center characters around their relationship and identity. but nowadays i think shows like to take the easy way out. for me, i always thought the most impactful example of queer representation in steven universe is "Rose's Scabbard". I genuinely don't enjoy that episode because it's a good example of the show thinking that trauma is an excuse for shitty behavior, but i cant deny that an entire episode of pearl breaking down and finally accepting that she wasn't the center of rose's world. it's the crew being forced to be creative and push through censors to telling a compelling story about a traumatized lesbian slowly realizing that she basically deluded herself into thinking she was someone's savior.
I think it's silly to try to place good queer representation in one box. like subtle queer rep is good, but also queer rep where a character flat out states that their gay. where I think it falls apart is when it either reinforces stereotypes without properly deconstructing or expanding on them, makes the characters so overly kind and non-controversial that the relationship is just boring, or try to make your messy and complicated characters but the narrative refuses to hold them accountable or at least acknowledge that they're doing something wrong. and to clarify on that last part, i'm not asking for some hays code nonsense where every bad person goes to prison and/or promises to stop being a bad person again. i mean the narrative doesnt just fucking sugarcoat their behavior. i don't want to see helluva boss ignore the fact that stolas made blitzo call him out for only using him for sex and then pathetically rush to justify their relationship by giving them a bizarrely sanitized and sweet backstory. and i don't want to see catra literally end the fucking universe and only do something good because she's straight up out of options and the show just decides that that was her redemption and she doesn't need to do anything to atone for what she did (including repeatedly abusing and verbally berating adora).
anyways velma has none of those interesting qualities and i'm pretty sure daphne and velma kissed because the creator is a weird pervert who thinks two girls kissing is hot.
#txt#i was thinking abt knocking off some of my longer posts on my tumblr but ya know its tumblr. its made for a blog#twitter isnt really a good place to write think pieces because its not really made for thinkpieces#i really enjoy expressing my thoughts on discourse and media but i don't want to over do it because ya know. you guys followed me for my ar#not my 2434334th post about why i think helluva boss is a bad show#but i've been thinking about sometimes prioritizing what i want to do vs what people want to see from me. so now you're getting#a long ass rant about why i think velma showing two teenagers kissing by episode 2#encapsulates the overall issue with modern queer rep
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since people apparently cant be formal im going to be: we dont use "q!" cuz people kinda dont want to talk abt the server, only spiderbit/guapoduo, so they decided to use "g!" or only "!", and when people are refering to other series they use the first letter of the series for example: "c!roier", i myself dont quite get the g!/! and understand why u dont like people not using "q!" when the universe they talking abt is qsmp
(people saw u complaining abt it here and start to shit on u without any context on twt and saying u complained that q wanst appearing in other fics even tho im pretty sure i didnt when ur distancing urself from him so i wanted to be formal :])
-🎀
(also can u explain y u dont like the "g!" or "!"???)
I can try to explain myself, but I'm also kinda crying answering this because I have a hard time with emotion regulation when I'm upset (autism thing)
OKAY! SO!
I don't really mind the new tag things? Like, I don't love them, but they're fine. If people want to distance themselves, that's fine. I'm distancing myself. Anybody who's been keeping up with my blog over the past half a year or so can see that I haven't really posted about the QSMP at all since Purgatory started. I haven't talked about Quackity at all outside of that shitshow of an awards ceremony in over a month when, for several years, I was a Quackity-centric blog (2021-early 2023)
My thing with the new tags, and with the Guapoverse thing in general, is that it really just isn't accessible for a larger audience. Sure, some parts of Twitter might understand it, but what about the rest of us?
As far as I can tell, the Guapoverse originated with a Twitter artist (Moone), and it blew up overnight. And I'm overall cool with it! It's a little silly, but so is fandom. I'm a fanfiction writer. Who plays Splatoon for like 4 hours every day. I know silly, and I love it
But then, BAM, I blink and everybody's abandoned the q! and they're changing their tags on Ao3 and making everything suddenly so much harder to find, and it's all about accessibility, isn't it? Like, don't get me wrong, I love a good multiverse, but when it inadvertently excludes a significant portion of the fandom, what are we supposed to do?
Like, say I go on Twitter looking for q!Pac fanart. But now it's so much harder to find because it isn't tagged or typed that way, it's !Pac, and that includes search results from every single au that has a ! in it, like if there was an au called AU!Pac? The !Pac would be in there. But I don't want to see AU!Pac, I want to see q!Pac.
And then there's the g! thingy. Like, that's fine, but a little more widespread of an explanation would've been nice. Like, what au does g! stand for? If you don't know what Guapoverse is, like A LOT OF PEOPLE don't, what are we supposed to think your art is? If we're looking for q!Cellbit art, we aren't necessarily going to like and retweet your art if it's labeled as g!Cellbit because we don't know that he's q!Cellbit.
It's kind of similar on Ao3, only that one's a little different because you can filter by relationship. But let's say you don't know how to do that. Let's say you're new to the website and you only know how to filter by fandom, because that's the first thing you learn how to do on Ao3- it's right there at the top of the front page: Browse By Fandom.
So you go to the QSMP tag looking for fics with Spiderbit/Guapoduo in them. But, here's the thing, you can't find any. Because they aren't being tagged QSMP, they're being tagged Guapoverse now even if the fics are being set in the QSMP setting.
It's just a general lack of fandom accessibility that gets me. I understand the distancing aspect, and I've been waiting for it to happen since the Elections when he Brazilian fandom started getting IMMENSE amounts of hatred from Gringo Chats. But it gets a little tricky when you're part of a fandom as large as this one is. How are we all supposed to share content and talk about things with each other if we can't even find each other anymore?
Like! I've lost so many cool fics I forgot to bookmark because they were taken out of the QSMP tag and moved into the new one! (The new one goes against ToS btw I believe, but go talk to a tag wrangler about that.)
People on Tumblr don't know what the Guapoverse is. TikTok doesn't. Reddit doesn't. Only Twitter does, and only a section of Twitter does. Because I haven't seen any English or French-speaking Guapoduo People talk about the Guapoverse, only Portuguese or Spanish-speaking people. And I get that the exclusion isn't purposeful and that the Guapoverse is meant to sort of heal everybody from the wounds the QSMP left, but I think that maybe even just spreading the news and not... you know... sending death threats and insults and smearing people's names would be better than this.
Thank you for politely asking. I thought I had made myself clear before, but I guess I hadn't.
I'm open to answer any more questions. I can't explain myself to my critics on Twitter, but I can answer your questions here, hopefully.
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Introduction/Fun Pearlie Facts
Was abt time I did one of these.
Hello everyone, my name is Pearl, Pearlie or Sam/Sammy if you're feeling like it. Friends also call me Martini sometimes.
I am a minor, my labels... we dont talk about them (fem presenting ftm gay/mlm + trying out gendervoid and verinix + bigender??) uhmm and I go by He/She, tho mostly He/Him by strangers- I can She/Her myself and close friends/mutuals are allowed! (I also go by neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)
I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.
I got the 'tism and the adhd, aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)
- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -
I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)
I like to roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are Life Series (+ evo + new life), Empires1(+ a bit of e2) and FNaF! (i dont rlly like the books tho lol..)
I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any fellow lifers or empires ppl, hermits aswell!! Tho I havent finished s8 or s9 yet...
Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!
- -💥-🐺-🌙- -❤️- -💛- -✨-💥-✨- -💛- -❤️- -🌙-🐺-💥- -
DNI prefferably:
- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)
- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.
- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.
- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much
CCs interact at your own risk. This is my domain, cyan man & moon lady. /hj
- -🪸-🐸-🌙- -💙- -🩵- -✨-🪸-✨- -🩵- -💙- -🌙-🐸-🪸- -
"Disclaimer"
- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao.
COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf
We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref
- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp life series/empires u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.
- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.
- -🌸-⛰️-🌙- -💚- -💙- -✨-🌸-✨- -💙- -💚- -🌙-⛰️-🌸- -
Special People Mentions!!
fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)
Family! <3
🌼@pehpurr* SISTER!! super duper cool, her art is great and you should check it out!! YOU. You're the brightest little girl (i say like ur not older than me) I'VE EVER MET ACTUALLY! You're so passionate and loving I freaking adore you!! I love you so much Scar, you're one of the best things to ever happen to me, Kanny <3
⚙️@gentlexmadman DAD!! you are my daaaad, you're my dad! woogie woogie woogie! ANOTHER amazing artist! mr "I know that guy-", very funny, Henry "Autism" Emily... the copper king, my father. Speaking to you is always comforting. Love you so much papa, you're amazing :)
Simply special <3
☕@insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love spending time with you guys and playing stuff together, you mean a lot to me and I'm so glad I met you. I hope we're still close for this year and many more! You're incredibly talented, not only at art, at everything you do. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world.
🍊Jack***, oh my dear Jacky, where do I even begin, sport... you really are my other half. Mi media naranja if you will. haha.. I love every second we spend together, I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and goofiness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. <3
New friends!
🍓@strawberrystarfield I know we met fairly recently but you're all incredibly fun to talk to, your art is also amazing, your accent is real pretty (cough for a bri-💥), you're real sweet and I love reading all your thoughts and critiques about things :} (love ya Aspen /gen)
🏜️@fagdykegtws My right hand man! I know we just met through the rarepair server but oh my god we're in the same brainwave!!! You're so fun to vc and chat with and you got the best ideas ever fr fr, love ya Chewy, you're real sweet even w how lil i know you ;)
That's it folks, love yall and see you around!
#intro post#introduction#c!pearl irl#sammy emily irl#delusional attachment#fictionkin#fictkin#fnaf irl#life series irl#empires irl#mcyt fictkin#mcyt fictionkin#mcyt kin#system friendly#endos dni#mcyt irl
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this is far overdue, so heres an introduction post
• you can call me queenie, im keeping my real name anonymous
• muslim (feel free to ask any questions, idm, theres no stupid questions only misinformation)
• minor
• my birthday is march 20th, astrology is full of shit because i am the epitome of a gemini but apparently im a pisces ??? no
• she/her
• poc
• intp (i know way too much about mbti and not enough about other forms of typology, like socionics, enneagram, etc)
• self-diagnosed autistic
• my special interests include writing (either original work or fanfics) and psychology
• hobbies include hyperfixating, reading, writing, listening to music, and ranting to my friends about books ive recently read
on this blog pretty much all i do is talk about my fandoms, which may include:
• riordanverse
• shadowhunters
• the folk of the air
• the ascendance series
• heartstopper
• anne with an e
(its mostly the first two tho)
and then the slew of anime i watch, which ill link here
my asks are also open in case youd like to request headcanons or fanfics, but obviously i cant do it if i dont know the fandom, so please if its anything anime/manga related, i cant guarantee that ill know it, so try to include the name in the ask
i also have a side blog @queenie-says-free-palestine. dont think i need to clarify what the posts are abt
uquiz masterlist (uquizzes i made):
• assigning you an ascendance series kin
• choose something about me and ill decide if i like you or not
• i assign you a percy jackson kin except the questions are stupid
more to come
kinlist here
my tags:
#queenie doesnt shut up
#eka asks
dni if you are:
• zionist
• ableist
• sexist (that counts as misogyny OR supporting #killallmen)
• racist
• religiophobic (including antisemitism)
• xenophobic
• proshipper
• sexualise minors (real OR fictional. idc if you age them up)
masterlist of my writing
i do have an ao3 account, which i will link here, but i only have like two works up on there as of april 2023
i also have a wattpad account, but its just the same fics as my ao3 account
also please follow the writing blog i made with my friendsss
tagging people who deserve some love:
irl:
@itadori-yujiii - sister who is always on the receiving end of my rants
@tinadablackthorn - other sister, sometimes forget she exists tbh
@greenmanwiththesauce - asshole friend who exists solely to make me question my existence
@velversess - my parabatai ily
@1tomie1 - one of my irl friends who is literally me but not really
@maybecordelia - cousin but also best friend also my fangirl buddy 🫶🫶
@ada-apolog1st - frenemy 😘😘
online (all of which are very cool people w amazing taste)
@aliciasfantasyxox - online-friend-in-law we have not conversed but hello
@moondust-on-the-hijabi - one of the first friends i made on here :D lovely lady lin rules over EVERYTHINGGG
@that-multi-fandom-hijabi - ARAB MUSLIM AROACES UNITE !!!!
@nerdy-girl3791 - showed up one day n i love seeing you around yes hello
@sleepy-vix - someone who likes heartstopper, bsd, sk8, thats hot people shit right there
@loife1m - LOLLIPOP :DD my love you are a breath of heaven walking upon this beautiful earth STAY STRONG BABES
@someonewhogotanaccount - rambling twinsies whos basically a confused n optimistic me
@heartstars - MY LITTLE SISTER I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH
@reyna-obsessed - my darling mini come lets be gremlins together
@hijabi-desi-bookworm - STOP CALLING ME [redacted nickname] OR I SWEAR TO GOD ILL SMITE YOU (jk ily esme<33)
yea thats pretty much it, may update later idk
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hiiiiiii bestie hiiiii hiiiiiii hiiii <3
no one else is asking so I will take one for the team. well maybe someone has asked but I will ask again if not. can you please tell us abt how kris and noelle meet in the drk au, and noelle’s uh. reaction to seeing dess again when she thought dess was dead? and ig by extension, kris. not sure if this is getting into spoiler territory so feel free not to answer or be as vague as you want :p
am also interested in hearing more abt ralsei and susie in this au. Please
have we talked abt this a bit? definitely. but the ppl on tumblr should hear it also and I like hearing abt it smile
hii hi hi <3
i do not know how much of this will be new for you but it will be new for everyone else so LETS GO!!!
NOELLE AND KRIS
okay so. i think i've mentioned this in other posts before, but the whole event that starts off everyone finding out dess and kris arent actually dead is that kris dives into a dark world! theyre trying to close a dark world like dess does, because they think that maybe!! that way!! dess will come back and be proud of them and love them and then she wont leave so much! because kris can close dark worlds too, see? now they can go with her!
they tell this to frisk, swear frisk to secrecy, and then! vanish lol they're Gone. the way dark worlds work here also isnt fully solid but im treating them sort of like mystery dungeons in pmd, so they dont fully follow the laws of like, physics and the like which means that even tho where kris lives is Very Far from hometown, noelle, susie, and ralsei are still able to get to the same dark world from hometown!
do not ask me what this dark world is like. i have No Idea. probably somewhat inspired by kris's life but i have not gone so far as to plot it out lol. the important part is that susie and ralsei split off from noelle (like in cyber city) and so noelle ends up running into kris, who has not only gotten lost but is in WAY over their head lol, so she saves them and kris begrudgingly agrees to stick with her. they totally couldve done this on their own. theyre sticking with noelle for her own safety. and noelle is just like yeah sure lol.
while traveling through the dark world together, noelle and kris have no idea who the other is! not only do they not really remember each other (noelle has a few vague memories, kris was even younger when dess took them so they dont remember anything at all), but they've both grown up a lot and in kris's case are fully presenting as a monster. they bond a bit over both being deer-monsters!
they cant fully communicate, tho...kris would be nonverbal throughout this entire trip and since noelle never grew up with kris she doesnt know monster sign language. she might remember a few words from her childhood but not enough to understand kris and even if she did she is a stranger so kris wouldnt sign OR speak to her anyways lol. but they do help each other out and close the dark world together! they come out in hometown and noelle promises to help kris find their parent cause they did Not mean to come here lol, and that is when! she checks her phone and shes gotten a text from toriel about a missing kid, and she's like....hey so uh i think your parent might actually be at my house lol wanna come by.
(while kris was stuck in the dark world, frisk got Very Worried and did eventually spill everything to chara, and thats how chara and frisk end up in hometown desperately trying to find kris! they come across toriel who helps them out and thats why they're at the holiday-dreemurr house).
and so things are all fun and fine until noelle and kris get back to noelle's house, and go inside, and kris is reunited with chara, and when that happens toriel sees this child and is like. holy shit. is that my dead kid.
and the fic would end there lol! (in my head this is a series, so, it would span multiple fics) another fun thing is this is the moment where noelle learns kris's name--so it wont really be a surprise for the audience cause i feel like most people could catch on that this is kris (remember up til this point we only follow noelle and the hometown crew, so we think dess and kris are dead), but if you didnt...
NOELLE AND DESS
honestly i dont know how noelle would react... i feel like she wouldnt have as big a response as everyone else! to her dess is less a person and more like, the story she's told as to why she cant do all the same things her peers do, why her mom + stepmom are so overprotective, why asriel stayed behind instead of going to college...dess loves noelle but noelle is like literally who are you. so when dess tries to like, bond with noelle, noelle doesnt want this...she grew up without a sister and that bond isnt going to form again! she doesnt know who this woman is!
its. very hard for dess needless to say. and for kris who sees how much dess is investing in noelle and theyre just like. okay well why was she never like that with me. which then leads to tensions between noelle and kris, which pushes kris to make some Very Bad Choices, and and and. plot <3
RALSEI AND SUSIE
actually the relationship ive thought about the least if im being honest. but i was talking about them to you last night and i think that like...there IS a level of antagonism that doesnt exist in deltarune canon. ralsei is trying to hard to stick to the prophecy, and when susie in this story's version of chapter one ignores it to be a villain with lancer, that hits A LOT HARDER in a world where from the very start the prophecy is being broken (since its two monsters who fall lol)
plus ralsei is also dealing with a lot of feelings shes never felt before--jealously, envy, not being able to just ignore her dysphoria anymore...shes a lot more aware of her crush on noelle and so noelle having a crush on susie isnt helping...
LIKE THEY ARE FRIENDS i think ralsei feels a LOT of guilt about all of this, and when its just her and susie things are good! they make sense!!! susie makes her wanna BE things wanna feel like maybe these things she feels are okay...but then everything always comes crashing down and its. bad again.
annnnnd thats all i think!! as always anybody can ask for follow ups. i'll spoil this entire au lol im sure things will change as i write it and besides. this is gonna take A While so when i do post it in like 2026 yall wont remember what i said here lol.
#drkau#deltarune#ask#ash my beloved ash#the 2026 number isnt a joke btw in my head this is All Of Deltarune. so. yknow. a clean 500k words or something like that#IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS AU.
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Randomly have the urge to talk about how I got into this fandom lol..
Alright soooo..
I find it funny that I have more knowledge about the Cybertronian war then our own wars, it's kinda sad just knowing my hyperfixation is that deep. Let alone drawing an entire fictional homosexual alien robot race's ancient language on my arm. Just to say stupid things that no one else understands like "gay" or "fuck", and no one would know because it's in cybertronian lmao. Not only that i'v made way too many ocs to even count, and made about 3 Transformer cosplays all by myself. Even though if I think about it, I've only been really dedicated in the fandom for about a half of a year or more. Although when I was younger I watched glimpses of 2015rid, Rescue Bots and the Prime series.
Fun fact..
And i'v made a shit load of ocs since, plus a few of my own alternate universes, my main being TFWF (Transformers War Forged) Wich basically Optimus actually fucking dies and Megatron becomes Prime, and everything goes to shit.
I don't like Bayverse, but that's what technically got me into it. I had recently gone to universal parks at the time and saw the transformers ride, and I was like.. "TRANSFORMERS ARE AWESOME!!" So we went on the ride, and it was actually pretty dope ngl. But after that, I got a bumblebee hoodie and wore it around everywhere because it was 50 dollars and of course I was going to wear it a lot. But after I got home, I was in school in art and I randomly thought, I wana make a Transformer oc.. SOOO I did, and his name was Speedo (DONT PICK ON ME FOR IT I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS PRIMUS) And so it escalated from there, I watched a mix of 2015rid and Prime, and watched a bit of Rescue Bots and Rescue Bots Academy. (I never finished either of the Rescue Bots TvT) and then learned about the comics. (But never fully read them/I don't have them. But listened to dubs, and learned from others about it. Tried watching Cyberverse but Netflix is an asshole and doesn't have the first few seasons so I lost interest (I know it's on YouTube, don't attack me for not watching it) I also watched all of the Animated series and cried my eyes out at the end because the ending sucked ass. And I'm still currently trying to watch G1..
And I obviously watched the new TFES and IM REALLY EXCITED ABT IT DJDNDJDJ
/I absolutely loved the ROTB movie..
Yeah.. that's basically everything lol..
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i want to hear ur thoughts abt object terror, you philosophor
so disclaimer i havent seen OT in fucking months so this insane ramble isnt gna be. the best but
object terror is one of the best worst fucking object shows ive ever seen, literally the PRIME example of some edgy kid trying to make an object show that isnt ur grandmas object show. no. this is the REAL shit and they say SLURS and theres BLOOD and GORE (yes im serious theres blood and gore and death but itsnot that bad, definitely a bit shocking if u didnt expect it to happen tho)
theres also shitty voice acting and terrible mic quality galore, EX: theres a fucking cup that had this dogshit mic for the longest fucking time and it deadass sounded like bro was talking into a washing machine ohmy god, i remember there was a clip of him going around on twitter a while ago cuz of this (i think that was my first time seeing anything from OT too so theres that)
OH and theres cactus, i barely remember anything abt him but he had this fucking emotionless voice that made me HYSTERICAL. there was a scene where someone got him pissed and he said "you take that back" with. absolutely no emotion at all and since then me and my friends keep fucking quoting that line cuz its the funniest fucking shit ever
btw that slur line i said earlier wasnt a joke, one of the characters straight up drops the R SLUR in the FIRST EPISODE (funnily enough, that character became the creators objectsona i think? ik they kinda used him as a mascot for a bit which is so fucking funny) tho i dont think they drop anymore slurs after that but dont take my word on it
anyways i gotta talk abt my favorite fucking part abt this fucking show before i get to. mint
THESE FUCKING CUNTS.
before i watched object terror i got fucking warned abt these two because there was a . homophobic scene w them or some shit and i had NO idea what it was for the longest time so i was really excited to see what object homophobia was gna be graced upon my faggotly eyes
and then theyjust. started making out randomly. LIKE OUTTA NOWHERE and there were other characters there that were gna try to attack/kill them? but then they saw them kissing and were like omg ewww boys (i think. the stuff that happens after this scene is kinda blurry tbh and im NOT gonna go back and watch the clip to see what happens ok. i REFUSE) and im sorry but thats the best fucking object show scene ever
AND LIKE? IDK? MAYBE ITS JUST ME BUT I DONT GET WHY I SAW PPL SAY THIS WAS HOMOPHOBIC???? i dunno maybe its just me but like these two just kissed while watching tv and eating chicken AND NOTHING BAD HAPPENED TO THEM!!! THEY LITERALLY WON IMMUNITY BY THE END OF THE EPISODE TOO. THEY WON. THE GAYS WON. and its so fucking funny to me bro object terror LOVES the gays
ok now i need to talk about mint im sorry i hate this fucking thing so much I NEED TO KILL HIM WITH A ROCK!!!! FFFUCK!!
hes literally just taco ii but 100x worse, i dont even like tacos evil arc or whatever cuz i always found her annoying BUT MINT IS SO MUCH WORSE
never in my. almost 2 years of watching object shows have i ever hated a character so fucking much LIKE GENUINELY THIS THING MAKES ME SO FRUSTRATED. hes just that. lol XD random character FOR THE WHOLE SERIES. just annoying and loud and does literally fucking nothing AND THE JOKES W HIM ARE SO FORCED I SWEAR THEY STOPPED . EVERYTHING THAT WAS GOING ON IN AN EPISODE JUST TO FOCUS ON THIS MOTHERFUCKER CUZ HE WAS GONNA DO SOMETHING FUNNY. im not mad that im missing out on some "juicy" object terror "lore" im just pissed that i have to see this fucking disgrace on my screen
oh and in the latest episode (as of now, the series isnt actually finished yet and i hope to god it never gets continued) SUDDENLY mint has a fucking arc THAT WAS NEVER FORESHADOWED AT ALL IN THE SERIES!! SO SUDDENLY HES A SMART GENIUS THAT COULD DO ANYTHING CUZ HE HAS MACHINES N SHIT AND A WHOLE ASS LABORATORY ??????? THEN HE FUCKING DIES
do you know how many fucking. mid and uninteresting characters we had to lose for him
DO YOU KNOW THE LOSSES I HAD TO DEAL WITH CUZ OF HIM
he lived for too fuckig long in this show dammit it pisses me off that he's even a character that exists . i blame him for being the reason why i hate joke characters (except david ily david bfdi)
i dont wanna talk abt him anymore im gonna
OK OK BUT. 1 more thing. smore
smore is this guy that they introduced later on in the series and hes a FUCKING. DEMON FROM HELL and i need him so bad actually
i think at some point he tries to . kill mint too so im literaly making out with him rn oh my god HES SO
im so mad hes in object terror IM GETTING YOU OUTTA THERE BABY ‼ ‼ 🗣🗣
honestly tho he was so cool im a little mad that they introduced him so late into the show CUZ WE ONLY SEE HIM FOR LIKE 2 EPISODES GRAHHHH RAAGHHHH babygirl
anyways thats it i feel like theres more but im not gonna wring out any more object terror knowledge from my brain i think that'll kill me
hope u enjoyed my insanity anon heres a loser . hope this heals you
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yo yo wassup I saw that captured woody art and like I wanna hear abt your whole woody and jessi au thing because like it seems interesting.
Screams violently
hehe oki!! i'm not sure how much of it i've spoken about in the past (if at all) so sorry if i sound like a broken record.
woody and jessie were born on tkani prime as the second generation of kids born there (ex alongside izzy)... woody was born with cerebral palsy and jessie had just attached herself at the hip with him one day when they were kiddos. despite woody's disability he had big dreams and never stopped until he achieved them: becoming the sheriff! he takes himself and his job pretty seriously, spends years dedicating himself to the city and protecting his people to the best of his ability. jessie became his deputy along the line somewhere.
the sort of toy story parallel comes in when buzz and his gang come back to tkani prime after saving the entire planet from the zurg ship, and they've basically become stars again. space rangers became all the rage, instantly beloved and the talk of the town, and this sorta spotlight stealing is what pisses woody off. he thinks it's ridiculous that they get their names in the history books just because they did ONE thing, meanwhile woody's still just regarded as the dusty ol sheriff despite spending Years of his life dedicated to this planet and his people. i actually wrote a rewrite fic thing of a scene in toy story which highlights good points as to why he's so fussy with space rangers.
roughly, the rest of the toy story translation would go like... they get stranded on the dark side of the planet thanks to woody trying to hijack one of buzz's ships, buzz is still completely unfamiliar with most of the planets surroundings so he's not much help but he has to fix his ship somehow, and without sox's help this time that's not much of a choice so they start venturing off wherever. hijinks ensue. i dont know how to translate sid nor do i know how buzz got an explosive strapped to him in the first place (probably alien shit) buuuuut eventually that drawing i made happens somewhere along the line and they reconcile. my friend wrote a rewrite fic on that that i never linked, so shoutout to @solzer0
me and thanatos also plotted/translated some other parts of the toy story series but thats all the steam i got for now. just wait until i tell you about woody getting abducted by aliens for the toy story 2 rewrite
#lightyear#lightyear 2022#toy story#buzz lightyear#woody pride#THANK YOU FOR ASKING i finally get to drop my lore#asks .#chuck shut up challenge .
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what do you look for in character dynamics? i think you like desert duo a lot but i dont know what their deal is
don’t know what their deal is like you don’t know who they are? desert duo is grian and scar from the mc series third life. it’s a competitive series that turns into improv storytelling which i like to divorce from the game aspect and view entirely as a story, where all the players are actors cast as characters (the actual players do this as well, a lot of them referring to themselves or each other as ‘characters’ or leaning hard into a specific ‘character’ for the game (ren im looking at you))
what draws me to desert duo is the same thing that draws me to a lot of character dynamics i like—deep-seeded loyalty which has been purposely earned or gained, said loyalty based on a promise or formal roles, a leader & right-hand dynamic that is actually mostly equal, fun complementary characteristics, and a compelling test (and, sometimes, break) of that loyalty
anyway you’ve given me an opportunity to talk about desert duo so i’m taking it. gonan examine them against the points i look for in character dynamics. i’ll put it under a read more because i dunno how long it’ll be but i do know it will be long
first session of third life, grian accidentally kills scar with a creeper. everyone in the game only has three total lives (green, yellow, and red), and scar is pretty quick to die even on servers where their lives aren’t limited. losing his first life first before everyone else, in session one, in a game where you want to be the last one standing, puts him at a pretty strong disadvantage. so grian pulls him aside once he respawns and promises his first (green) life to scar. once he’s made things even and gone to yellow, scar’s on his own, but until then grian’s going to do whatever scar says and try his best to keep scar alive
which, check your boxes, ☑️ formalized promise and ☑️ a leader and right-hand!
grian then spends the rest of the next two sessions insisting he’s going to leave as soon as he can. any attempt by scar to talk abt lasting plans is shot down, and any scheme scar starts grian tries to undermine—he has to do what scar says, but that doesn’t mean he can’t warn the people they talk to scar’s trying to scam them (because scar is scamming everyone always in 3L. he spends all of sessions two and three scamming people. it works also. nat 20 charisma on near every role that man made for all of 3L)
all that said, grian’s actively building them a house in the meantime and, by the end of session 3, actively helping with some of the shit scar is pulling (such as encouraging taking a diamond chestplate). he insists when asked he’s going to leave, and often says he doesn’t care what scar is doing because “i have no stake in this,” but he already does
then scar dies. again. falls to his death, complete accident, putting him on red, his final life. red lives operate under different rules—while yellow and green names cannot attack other players or engage in pvp, red lives not only are allowed, but it’s their main goal. scar’s supposed to be attacking other players now. some people in chat float the idea grian should be allowed to leave now that there’s a red name at his base. if grian really wants to leave, he has an out
scar comes back on red and the first thing he does is throw grian flowers and ask “can we still be his friends?” now that he’s ‘scary.’ and grian assures him that yes, he will stay. he has to, right?
(this is a little loyalty test, and a step in building that deep loyalty, but hold off on checking those boxes quite yet) (this also makes me feel fucking insane)
now. grian’s favorite block in the game is tnt. so now that his partner is red, he starts immediately planning traps. grian can’t kill, but he can do it if scar ‘tells’ him to. you can now check off the ☑️ complementary characters box, because we have a fun parallel: a green name player who plays like a red life, and a red name player who plays like a green life. grian immediately gets the largest kill in the series, taking out three people with a bomb left outside the gate of ren, who scar antagonized/threatened when he was on yellow (and it didn’t really mean anything) ((3L ren also makes me insane))
scar talks a lot of game about murder, but he’s not really one for pvp—pretty sure he says outright to grian he’s all bark. grian talks a lot about having no stakes and following scar’s orders, but is the one calling the shots about who and when and how they’re going to get kills (check off the right hand and leader dynamic being ☑️ mostly equal, actually). grian digs his claws in deep with scar by killing a lot of the rest of the server—i think he gets like four kills incl the bomb and contributes to at least one other, from all three other major ‘factions’ on the server—which doesn’t exactly do him any favors when he’s ‘free’ of scar and needs somewhere to go. he still insists hes going to leave, but scar doesn’t acknowledge it. pretty sure the one time he brings it up, scar even says grian won’t actually leave, but i don’t think grian acknowledges that
session 7 rolls around, second to last. players are starting to be eliminated here—of the 14, three of them die permanently in this session. grian and scar get into a big fight against an opposing faction. grian dies. on yellow, he runs right back to scar. neither of them acknowledge it. he stays (you can check two points: ☑️ deep loyalty that is hard-earned. ☑️ compelling loyalty test). when grian finally addresses this alone, to the audience, he explains, “i just can’t let him die”
final session is session 8. it’s basically nonstop battle. the others are whittled down one by one—ren and martyn go on a fuckin killing spree and ren takes out three lives, eliminating two players (ren my beloved), then the survivors get into another large fight ending with four more dead (grian says to scar, right before this, entirely unprompted: “is this where we prove our true allegiance to each other and no one else?”). there’s five left, and this is where the betrayals start.
one person betrays someone who had helped him since day one, someone who had sworn his loyalty (the fun thing about improv stories is the thing that become foreshadowing by accident). now there’s four. scar breaks a promise to another person, having him killed. now there’s three. grian, scar, and a third, bdubs: another red name who just betrayed his day one and killed the fourth place winner for scar.
both bdubs and grian are following scer, so scar essentially just says “whoever gets this piece of paper i won’t kill” and drops it on the ground. bdubs get it. scar and bdubs turn on grian immediately, killing him and sending him to red
and that’s another check, there. ☑️ a compelling loyalty break. at the end of it all, grian follows scar to the end, and scar kills him.
but there’s still like ten godamn minutes left! grian hunts scar down, promising to kill him for being a traitor, and as soon as he gets there, scar kills bdubs. he turns around and tells grian “you can kill me, for everything you did to keep me alive this long” and encourages him to win. grian drops the anger immediately and insists he can’t do it
which is already insane enough as a scene. deeply fucking insane. but the people who have already lost insist there can be no double victory, and someone has to win. scar and grian go back to their mountain in the desert, drop all their gear, and fight bare-handed to the death.
something that interests me about the final fight is it’s impossible to tell if scar is throwing or if he just sucks at pvp. regardless, in the end grian wins. the entire fight is just them apologizing to each other. grian immediately turns around and jumps to his death, ending the series with no winners at all
…which is all the detail i’ll give abt the final fight bc i think about it SO much and this ask is long enough without me going into it. suffice to say the whole finale, from scar and bdubs killing grian to the end, is just… fascinating to look at through the lens of their loyalty. grian spends the whole series insisting he’s going to leave as soon as he can, but in the end, his whole life is dedicated to keeping scar alive. and it blows up on him! scar turns on him! grian fails to keep him alive! he kills scar in the end, and then takes his own life. its tragic and i’m obsessed with it
loyalty-based dynamics have always done it for me. Luffy and Zoro, for example, hit all of those points except the loyalty break: start with a promise, complementary characters, leader and right hand (but rather informal), Luffy earns Zoro’s loyalty over a number of important scenes, ending with Zoro’s sacrifice at 485. there’s even other third life dynamics that hit those points that i also really like (ren and martyn).
i find gradual growth and strengthening and tests of a bond/loyalty to be inherently interesting and i always have. watching two characters face adversity against their bond and choosing each other over and over is always compelling to me. the fact only one person can be left standing in third life adds an especially fun layer of flavor on their dynamic bc that loyalty is earned and developed and inherently doomed, it can’t be forever. it’s really fascinating. esp when it’s entirely unscripted improv, evolving like that on its own. the whole story is just so fuckin fun and i like it a lot
if anyone reads this far shoutout to you for being the bravest motherfucker alive. anon thank you so much for asking. if this wasn’t exactly what you were looking for and you want me to talk abt character dynamics more broadly feel free to send another ask, i’d be happy to keep going on this
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hello coda >:] riddle me this. i dont actually have a riddle i just came to ask as a newer petscop enjoyer if u have any fun petscop trivia? i literally just finished watching it a few days ago and i keep thinking abt it..on my mind..smoke the shit that made the pets scop
Hello! Wow welcome to the world of petscop. Sure, I'm not exactly sure what qualifies as trivia but here's a few things you might not know if you're new to things.
Something I find neat: Interestingly the majority of petscop's characters have existed for 10+ years across a variety of different projects. I mostly keep from talking about them because the guy who made these things buries at least one of them on purpose, but care& her immediate family has existed (albeit in a very different story with very different lives) since as early as 2009, while rainer and mike have existed since as early as 2012! ...we don't really know anything about the 2012 iteration of these characters other than it was mentioned but i always find it really fascinating that the majority of the characters are just one iteration of concepts that have shown up a bunch of other times. Paul, lina, and belle all appear to be new characters though! Which is neat.
Relatedly the symbols in the background of even care and that reoccur throughout the game are also old imagery from a former project, nifty (Which is for sure the reason why the nifty function in petscop is called nifty LOL)
Nifty's a fun little game, extremely old though, it's really surreal to see the pscop tiles showing up in it retroactively. This game actually played a really big part in people finding out who made petscop; its common knowledge now but was purposefully obfuscated until ~episode 22 iirc, i was amidst the group of people who were the first to find out haha, it was the same night that pokemon sword and shield released LOL Chaotic times
Oh also, the song from petscop "explore" also showed up first in nifty! i like this version a lot because it is just grating as fuck. This song is like, 15 years old.
Ummm here's paul leskowitz trying to say pieces of paper
Jeez what else. Oh petscop is made very strangely. It's something like a "digital puppet show", where inputs are recorded and then played back and layered over eachother recursively to create scenes in pretty much every case where multiple characters are on the screen interacting. These inputs are also often reused, which results in a phenomenon where movements across episodes sync up in perfect unison really often, which is thematically powerful, sometimes relevant to the literal story, and other times just really weird. Here's a neat video demonstrating a couple of these. (this is only from the first half of the series so there's a lot missing.) It's a pretty powerful demonstration of how intricate the entire thing is.
That's just a couple neat not-immediately-obvious things that don't really concern actual story or game mechanism stuff , which is kind of what i took you to mean when you said trivia. hoepfully that was what you were thinking of? maybe you learned something : )
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not to talk abt video games on this blog, esp tl*u2 (🤢🤮🤮), but i keep thinking abt how i compared wha to tl*u2 and its so weird. i dont know what to call it when that happens. i jokingly referred to it as cop propaganda in wha, but what is the thing where u try to justify/excuse (?) one thing, by bringing up an irrelevant thing...
in tl*u2, u meet the character abby, the fantasy post apocalyptic idf soldier bc neil druckmann is a weirdo, who brutally ambushes, and murders the father of the game's protag after he saves her. she did this because in the past he killed her dad, and he did this bc he wanted to kill his daughter (the protag), all those reasons and shit aside, the player most likely does not like abby because that is her introduction. she never changes her mind abt it, feels bad, sees any other side, etc., whatever. she is the immediate antagonist, and the player rightfully dislikes her like the protagonist does. the game then forces you to play abby; you get scenes like her playing catch with her police dog (who mercilessly attacks the protag/player), she is seen saving a zebra out of nowhere (paralleling to a past action the protag also did), she bonds with a kid (paralleling the father-daughter relationship of the original protag), and her scene w her dad dying is supposed to be sad (paralleling the protag's dad she kills).
in wha, the witch cops, whose names i cant even remember atm, fucking hate our 10 y/o protag. they want to apprehend her and wipe her mind because she used magic unlawfully to try and help some people, and she herself wasn't even originally a witch, which they think should be something people are born with. im being vague bc i haven't read it in a while, but the point is they've remembered this and highly suspect her of being ~evil~. the reader most likely doesnt like them, bc they're so callous towards a child who had no bad intentions. then u get this chapter with some of the witch cop's povs and the one has a bf (wow gay people!!), then they're shown being shunned by normal people (oh no, no one wants to speak to them...), then the one cop lady has a flashback of being saved by the group after she was sexually assaulted and blamed (obviously a bad thing), there might be more things beyond that chapter, but i cant remember lol.
anyways my point is both piece of media repeatedly bring up completely unrelated things in an attempt to change the viewer's opinion on the character you initially had strong feelings for either by trying to make u like them or pity them. its not bad to change your mind, but these ways feel so inorganic, like the creator has a gun to your head like "do you feel bad now..! see how sad that was? how cute that scene was?!?!" when something like playing catch with a dog who previously tried to maul the previous protag doesn't exactly make me feel better about it, or the one cop being gay has nothing to do w him kinda turning a blind eye to his coworkers aggressive behavior towards a minor. an organic way to change an audience member's mindset should be through things like the character actually changing their behavior, directly to the bad thing they did in the past. for example, if the mean attack dog was revealed to have been shown in a cage, mistreated by the soldiers, forced to fight, i might think "well, i guess, its not the dog's fault, its the horrible owners.", but i still wouldn't be like "oh i killed someone's puppy :(". when u play fetch w it as the other pov, i'm like 'hey, this is that asshole dog who hurt my character, fuck this dog." lol... im not gonna be like uwu doggo cute or whatever. and same w the witch cop characters... like ok, cool backstory, but u were still shit to the literal child, what does you being a victim of sa have to do with anything...
idk, like i finished watching extraordinary attorney woo recently, and there's a character who felt threatened by the autistic protag regarded as a genius, so mr tactician spends half the series trying to sabotage her, but he does eventually back down. he stops (one thing), then even sides with her and tries to connect (even more!). it's a good start to a "redemption arc" and changing the characters and viewer's mind abt him. he even had some "oh my family is sick, im just average, she's a genius", but the series doesn't use that as his excuse to treat the protag like shit. he goes beyond just stopping his behavior, and he can do more and actually address it w her and all that. that's a good way to change the watcher's mind.
either the character's actions change, or there is more information revealed, which i think is harder to successfully pull off. tl*u2/wha could count as that, but they weren't successful bc those other facts didn't relate to the action that got the character disliked. i can't really think of too many works that do it well, but ousama ranking when it didn't get weird last second was very good at it. the later chapters of trigun had vash in an argument w knives saying he's too quick to judge, and he doesn't know the whole truth, which i disagreed w vash's specific example used, bc imo that also didn't excuse them (if i even understood it right, i reread it over and over and never really was convinced/understood it or why it works as that, lol), but it can work when it is actually done right.
these two examples i've compared, the characters are associated with the military/police in some way, so it'd still kinda feel like propaganda, but it would've been so much easier for it to be some sort of misunderstanding first, then they try to make up for it, then i might want to give them a break or another chance, instead of seeing one is gay and ignoring what they did before lol. esp w their position, they have a "attack first, ask questions never" attitude which inherently is part of the problem. the one gay cop kisses his bf and marches off to assault this newly awakened fucking dead dude who is missing his orphan, disabled son. i don't feel bad for the cops in this situation, lol!
#personal#this is very long and is nothing. sorry FJHDFS#but yeah idk if i can call it bad writing or what#and like its kinda debatable on what it is but how the character who did the bad thing feels abt it could help lol#like if the one guy went 'wait maybe that was bad... maybe i shouldnt do that again. i'll go apologize.' that is something#instead the guy keeps glaring daggers at a kid and im supposed to like him bc he helped his cop friend?? i dont think soo#also i forgot to say but the moment thatd make the viewer dislike the character couldve been shown to be a one off moment#they dont normally do this/theyve never done it before/etc#but as i said it depends on like what the action is lol#anywayss
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hiiii! i absolutely adore enouement & lhc and i was wondering if you were planning on making it a whole series? with each of the boys? i honestly really enjoy the universe you made and the whole dynamic between each of the character. i also really enjoyed a chubby reader that is about other insecurites rather than their weight. it was refreshing!! i'm not trying to pressure you or anything i am just really curious. i do really enjoy your writting :D <3
so im kissing u on da mouth rn for this ask /j
first of all i wanna say it: ur so sweet!!!! thank u for enjoying my writing!! it means a lot <3
aaa okay so fun fact.... i had like... two more fics kind of planned for tht universe? one was another chubby reader w vernon (i think i've talked abt it before maybe?) and another was a gn!reader with dino where they were fake dating. vn fic has more planned for it as of rn (it kinda deals w some fatphobia n body image issues that arent exclusive to reader!!) and genuinely feels like a slightly heavier read? but its still something i'd enjoy writing lol
like at one point in lhc i mention seungkwan having to give up movie tickets and chan immediately snatches them up bc the other two ppl were vernon and a friend? that friend was gonna be the reader of dino fic!! they're friends lol the entire premise was "ppl gettin fuckin NOSY abt chan not dating anyone so he pitches the idea to his friend with a plan to stage a breakup later and whoops idiots fell for each other" bc im a cliche bitch!! which tbh could work as a later fic if i decided to write more members before then bc i could hit maybe on the pressure of dating someone when ur friends all start getting together w ppl. theres less planned for this one (i wanted to finish planning vn fic since chronologically it happens after lhc but before dino fic) but i did have like. a long convo planned out of chan dumping reader bc he caught feelings and his friends confronting him over it.
im not sure if i'm 100% down to write a fic for each member but like... i do genuinely rly like this universe? i'd have to keep track of how much time has passed between fics tho since LHC takes place a few months after enouement and untitled vernon fic takes place like... the following fall? im using western school year shit sue me lmao
but i'd at least be interested in doing it!! idk if i'd do multi-part fics for ever member or if i'd go back to a longfic like enouement for a few of them. i feel like there's def potential for more set in the universe! esp considering the number of members still in school lmao
like im open to a fem!reader in general. im open to more fem!chubby readers bc i rarely find those fics myself and im happy to help other ppl in my boat like... find representation written specifically for them yknow? but im also open to more gn!readers for the saga? i think i'd def want a balance in there ykno if im gonna write more fem!reader fics. i wouldnt want every fic to be fem!reader bc i feel like thats unfair to ppl who dont identify that way yknow?
also idk just know it like... genuinely means a lot to hear feedback on lhc and ppl who are glad i wrote a chubby reader whos insecurities arent fully abt her weight? lhc didnt really net that much attention which is fine lmao i really don't write for the attention i'm getting otherwise i'd write for a bigger group too. its just nice to know that other people also were kinda bothered by the way chubby reader fics default to the "im insecure bc im not hot :(" mentality since imo being chubby is like... way more than that. it just weirdly reinforces the idea that we should hate ourselves and our bodies for just existing.
like. vernon fic would have a chubby reader who deals with body insecurities but its more so "people are harassing me now bc of my body and its making me self conscious after i finally thought i grew past hating myself" than just the generic "i think i am ugly :(" feelings if that makes sense? also theres a reason for that harassment (this fic was Also once a smau like lhc was). like i said, kind of a heavier fic compared to lhc.
anyway ill stop rambling but to answer ur question for good: im interested! nothings really on the table outside of vernon + dino fics, but im def interested >:3
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Also like I see so many people say shit like "car boys but its just griffin playing" or "nick wasnt even that funny" and like no! thats the entire problem is that nick WAS funny and talented. He was an integral part of the series not only as cohost but as the one who edited the videos to be that emotional and impactful.
Sometimes, shitty people make good art and thats what makes it hurt worse, that their talent isn't proportional to their morality. I wish it could be that only good people made good art and bad people made bad art, like that Roald Dahl passage about ugly thoughts. but its not that easy.
#Especially in the internet age where a creator's persona is as much the product as the content they produce#You cant try to purge the artist from the art because the persona is part of whats being sold#You couldn't make car boys with some other cohost#you couldn't edit around nick to make some 'oops all griffin' version of carboys#because griffin and nick interact and bounce off one another#Literally one of the most memorable lines from the series is griffin yelling nicks name#And even if you could its too late!#car boys is already done and out there as it is#made by a guy who did gross shit#and its GOOD#and what the fuck do you do with that#not in the consumption sense I dont give a shit abt that#I feel zero guilt over his actions especially when he no longer profits from the content#but in the social sense#how do you talk abt or interact with the series without inevitably coming back to that point#how is ever interaction with it not soured#how do I reblog a post or talk about it without someone inevitably coming at me being like 'ummm you know what he did right'#how do I consume the content without prefacing everything with performative disclaimers of how yes I know the internet man did a bad#it cant just be anymore its always gonna have that stain#and we always Gott be like 'yes I know the stain is there yes its very ugly but anyway I liked this part of it'#and its just a fuckin bummer#Car boys
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Relationships: WayV
MaeKun
if it werent for the the laws of ncity he wouldve asked her to join wayv and stay in their dorms
Since they don’t live together or are part of the same unit they don’t really spend a lot of time together but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t want to be with Mae
Large parent/protective older brother energy
not as protective as 127 hyungs but you know
Yeah she’s a menace when she teams up with other WayV members but she doesn’t clown him as much as they do it’s cause she saves that energy for doyoung lmao
mae claims she visits the wayv dorm for him but he’s 50% sure she’s just there for the animals
the other 50% is because she wants him to cook for her which he does even if she doesnt ask
hes like those parents who insist on giving you leftovers to bring home to your family
he taught her to do magic tricks bc she was insistent on wanting to learn at least one
okay but honestly she thinks he really cool despite all the clowning she does to him
like singing? dancing? cooking? visual? magic? and he can fly a plane????
one of the reasons she has high standards ngl
MaeTen
ten has unofficially adopted her whether people like it or not
he has fought with taeyong and doyoung about it she is his baby
if mark and johnny are his brothers, mae is basically his younger sister
if you look at his photo gallery he has a folder dedicated to mae and mae only
any photo or video of them together is basically ten clinging to her like a koala
he looks at her like she put all the stars in the sky but the same goes for mae
she has admitted in an interview that ten is one of her role models because of his talent and work ethic
whenever she needs help with dancing he’s one of the first people she asks
xiaojun once asked him who’s his favorite between yangyang and mae and you could see him malfunction for like six seconds before jokingly scolding him
“yah how could you ask me that type of question?”
fun fact! ten was the person she asked to go with her when she got her first tattoo!
he arranged the appointment at the place where he got his and held her hand when she was getting it
Lowkey considered getting matching tattoos but never really took the time to think of what tattoos they’d get
MaeWin
another top ship among czennies
these two are so soft for each other omg
just one glance at the two and you’re already melting
You can see Yuta screaming about MaeWin whenever the group is together and they’re interacting
And if you can’t see it you’ll probably hear it
MaeWin: casually talking
Yuta: is this what heaven looks like
MaeWinMark is just yuta’s weakness and he doesn’t even bother to hide it
Okay back to MaeWin before I get ahead of myself and make an entire post about Yuta and MaeWinMark
If they’re gathered in a large group their interactions aren’t really noticeable unless you’re actively looking for it
While the others are talking you can just see Mae playing with his hands or winwin giving her a soft smile while patting her head
They talk more when they’re either in a small group or just the two of them
MaeWin shippers were devastated when they got separated so when nct 2020 happened they went feral
Every once in a while they go out for hotpot and talk about what has been going on
LuMae
this man right here
they first met when she was visiting NCT U dance practice for BOSS with food and she heard him from the hallway
its one of the reasons why she wasn’t intimidated by him even though hes a giant
she was excited to see what kind of energy and personality he would bring to nct
and she was not disappointed at all
personal hype man
whenever they’re on a variety show together and mae is asked to do something he just yells “FIGHT HAEYADWAE”
of course the same goes for mae but less loud bc last time she kept yelling she lost her voice and couldnt talk for the rest of the show
He just has this energy where if he’s hyped up about something she feels energized to be hyped up well so you just hear the both of them cheering loudly
its always interesting to see because you just see a gentle giant cheering loudly with this smol girl next to him trying to match his energy
he always makes sure she’s comfortable when they’re at a schedule
like we know how he’s really silly on camera but he’s also very observant and caring
one time mae complained about how her feet hurt from the heels she was wearing so he just picked her up bridal style and walked to the van without a word
XiaoMae
They’ve heard abt each other from Kun and ten and greeted each other when they passed by each other in the halls but they never really had a chance to grow close until nct 2020 happened
Mae wasn’t in the Make a Wish unit so there weren’t a lot of chances to get to know each other while promoting either but it doesn’t mean they’re not friends
ten also hogs her attention when she visits the wayv dorms but we dont talk about that
these two arent as close as the others but not to the point where they actively avoid each other
whenever they’re together they just vibe
theres no awkward silence or small talk they just talk about random stuff
“no lucas, i dont hate xiaojun hyung we just dont hang out as often as we do”
“yes hendery we do have each other’s numbers we just don’t talk often”
WayV is lowkey tempted to lock the two of them in a practice room together and do a vlive to see what’ll happen
prime candidates for “It’s Awkward but It’s Okay”
their dynamic is kinda DoRen where they pretend to be awkward around each other as a joke
like they went out together once and everyone as excited bc omg they were interacting
XiaoMae shippers are starved for content and will accept any crumbs that come their way
HenMae
the duo people didnt know they needed until they met
its not like people didnt want them to become friends its just that theyre energies match well
these two are such a vibe
you know how there are ppl who don’t see for long periods of times but you still want tackle them in a hug whenever you meet? yeah its like that
kun sometimes wants to separate the two bc of how much chaos they cause together
they’re the duo where they think something is a good idea at the time but ends up as something bad at the end
kun has banned the two from the kitchen bc of a fire they started
HenMae shippers are thriving because of all the stories of the dumb shit they’ve done
lowkey considered doing a series together on nct daily but then the channel stopped uploading vids so it was never mentioned again
one time he was on call with his sister when she walked in and accidentally mistook her as his gf and now they jokingly have each other as bf and gf in their phone contacts
ten nearly had a heart attack when he saw the contact name pop up and mae picked up the call
yangyang has the whole thing recorded on his phone and refuses to delete it
MaeYang
(A/N everytime i see this gif i need a moment to pause and try and remember my ideas cause my head goes empty when it comes to yangyang)
okay if HenMae are chaotic, MaeYang are worse
kun doesnt need to dye his hair gray bc of all the stress these two cause him
czennies thought they didnt interact much bc of different schedules and groups but once nct world happened they changed their minds
MaeYang slowly climbing up the ranks of nct ships
during one of his lives yangyang mentioned how he spoke a lot with mae and that she wanted to add him to the 00liner gc
czennies lost it that day bc 1) holy shit theres a 00liners gc and 2) why tf hasnt yangyang been added into it yet
insists that she calls him oppa/hyung even though theres only a one month difference between them
Mae and Yangyang: whispering in the corner of the room
kun: theyre either talking shit about someone or world domination and i cant tell whats worse
he tried teaching her some german once and she now knows like three sentences
“Hallo, Ich bin Mae. Was geht ab? Mir geht’s gut.” (A/N this is the outcome of my three years of german lessons everyone)
and basically all the swear words but we dont need to talk about that
haechan jokes that he’s stealing mae away from the dreamies so he wont be the maknae in wayv
#nct 24th member#24th member of nct#nct female addition#nct female oc#nct au#kpop female addition#nct addition#nct dream female member#nct dream female addition#nct 127 female addition#nct 127 female member
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