#clearly the best one
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no one asked for this but i was in the kitchen makin instant ramen and poleaxed by the thought of landoscar puppy play post-melbourne in the style of a fic i thought was gemjam's but now can't find where mark webber gave his then-protegee mitch evans a collar to help with homesickness anyway whatever have some fuckin words
edit: fuck's sake cassian obviously it was a collar and a kiss by zeraparker
mild warning for hopelessly undernegotiated kink
"Don't you ever get homesick?" Oscar could count the number of people he'd less like to be having this conversation with than Lando Norris on one hand and one of them's the bored immigration officer who had to tell him he'd not got his passport stamped right in Doha.
Lando snaps his gum, looking up to the ceiling like he's actually thinking about it. "No? Not really. I was sick of fucking Bali over Christmas, jesus and I don't want to go back to Dubai but like, home is everywhere innit?"
"No." Oscar closes his eyes, pinches the bridge of his nose. Obviously Lando doesn't experience this, he could literally drive to his parents' house on half a tank of fuel, straight out of the MTC car park. Straight from Oscar's flat, where for some reason he's letting Lando crash as though him seeing the post-Australia comedown is a good idea.
"Hmm." Hearing Lando think is always disturbing. "Well, what can I do about it?"
Oscar has to open his eyes again in disbelief. 'What do you mean do about it?"
Seeing Lando cocking his head on one side, like a dog, makes something painful sear across Oscar's temples. "You're sad, I want to fix it. Max always-"
"Don't tell me about that." He can't hear about Max Fewtrell right now. The guy haunting the garage all weekend was enough. Oscar doesn't need a reminder he's not Lando's first anything, needs to keep the thoughts about breaking up with his girlfriend so they can properly be a thing to himself.
"Well." Lando is literally sitting on his hands. "Then you have to tell me about it yourself."
Thing is, this is too much. It's not the kind of thing he should share with Lando. Lando who he just got team-ordered for, Lando who he needs to match the tyre management of, Lando who will sit there and smile angelically and get his fucking way on anything they ever diverge on about feedback.
Oscar's clenching his jaw so hard he can almost feel the ache where they took his wisdom teeth, though. Another thing he didn't know he'd really miss this much.
"You can't fucking laugh at me." Why's he said that, for fuck's sake? Lando laughs at everything, would probably do it at a funeral in his weird, stressed-out way when he doesn't know how to socially behave.
"Ok." Lando's eyes are very big and he's looked up from his phone. "I can order TimTams on Uber Eats?"
That's actually quite sweet. But not what Oscar needs right now.
"Just - stay here." Lando's fucking weird, he's probably into some of this shit himself. If not something freakier, lying around his Monaco flat in a gimp mask, suffocating himself or god-knows-what shit.
It doesn't take long to find the box. Oscar's consciously never accumulated too much stuff in this flat, like he might have to move out of it any time. Like everything might have to go in a suitcase because the contract review board said it's over, kiddo, go back down under and pretend you understand your dad's business enough to pay him back.
It's not got very much in. Oscar doesn't like to wear too much, when he's like this. Just a t-shirt and shorts or his boxers. He doesn't think he's ready for Lando to see him shirtless, like this, make his eyes crinkle up in glee at how much of Oscar he can touch.
It'd be better if Lando did it, if someone put it on for him but that's too complicated to ask for, so Oscar does it himself, mostly. Puts the soft shorts on, an old Prema shirt that's a little too tight to wear outdoors but feels comfy, soft, reassuring on his skin.
The ears are easy but the collar. He can't do that, himself. Can't give himself the ball, the well-chewed, if pristinely laundered, beanie toy. Whines, unhappily, about it.
"Osc-" obviously, Lando heard him. The sounds of him chaotically standing up, nearly falling over Oscar's rug and stumbling towards his bedroom door, are already clattering through the flat. "Can I come in?"
He just whines again, an animal thing. Oscar needs permission, like this, doesn't give it.
"Ok you better not be dying because I never finished the first aid-" Lando stops in the doorway. "Oh."
Oscar sinks to the floor, his knees bending beneath him, shoving the box at Lando before he folds down on his knees and elbows, looking up at the guy he's supposed to do anything to beat.
"Good..." Lando moves his mouth around for a moment, licks his lips. "Puppy?"
He doesn't have a tail to wag, although he has thought about one of the plugs, sometimes. Objectively, the bit of Oscar's brain that's still somewhat functioning says wiggling his arse must make him look ridiculous, especially when he paws at the box and whines again.
Lando crouches down, touches the ears. "Do you want to go out?"
Oscar cringes back, shaking his head violently. God, imagine the headlines.
"Ok." Lando does his head-cock thing again, then sticks his hands into the box. "Do you want your collar?"
It's pretty shameful, the way Oscar crawls forward so easily, smushes his face against Lando's knee and maybe he should have asked about this properly but Lando goes easily, scritching behind Oscar's ear. "Oh you're such a good boy, look at you."
Lando fumbles the collar for a second, not getting the buckle right the first time and it's nearly uncomfortable enough Oscar stands up, right back out of it but then it goes and it's snug and tight and good, Lando's hand in his hair.
"Are these your toys?" Lando shifts to kneeling, lets Oscar get his head right in his lap, nuzzling against Lando's stomach through the pouch of his hoodie. He doesn't need to answer that one, it's pretty obvious.
"Well, I don't think Oscar would want you breaking his stuff, so I'm going to leave the ball here." The third person is a jolt, like a nod to camera but it feels right. Oscar is elsewhere, can worry about that later.
"Come on then, good dog." Lando stands up, with the beanie toy in hand. It's a koala, a stupid joke. "Come and play, then."
It's not a comfortable flat to get through on your hands and knees, hard wooden floor jarring him in a way that'll probably bruise a bit, tomorrow. Lando's walking easily, waggling the beanie like he thinks he needs to keep Oscar interested.
Not Oscar. Puppy. It feels good.
Lando pushes the coffee table away, scraping on the floor in a way Oscar's landlord will probably have an opinion about when he comes to pay the deposit back. But puppies don't worry about that kind of thing, so Oscar just crawls over to where Lando's sitting, legs spread and outstretched, on the rug.
"Come on," Lando holds out the beanie, waving it by Oscar's mouth. "You want this, yeah?"
Oscar growls, nips at it. It's not the toy he wants, really, just the -
Ah, perfect. Lando pulls Oscar forward by the toy, right on top of him as he leans back. Oscar can paw him like his, Lando laughing delightedly and twisting away.
It's - he's seen the video, McLaren posted it for some national day or something last year - the same way Lando plays with his family's dog. Silly, rolling around the floor, letting Oscar half-hump him while Lando's shrieking and trying to get out of his grip, only to dive back in, wrestling with Oscar.
The rug scoots across the floor under them and they nearly crash into the telly, Oscar ending up on his back, against the sofa, Lando tickling his tummy but the toy in Oscar's mouth, triumphant.
"Are you submitting? Are you letting me lead the pack?" It's a bit on the nose but yeah, maybe. Oscar kicks out a leg, half-heartedly, to show he isn't always going to be ok with that.
"What a good boy." That, he is always ok with. More than human-Oscar would like to admit.
Lando lies down next to him, face a bit flushed and eyes bright from playing. "Always wanted a dog. You can even come to all the races."
#emptyhalf fic#ramen is cold now bad vibes#but then again it was the indomie chicken flavour so not exactly storming anyway#why does NOWHERE ever have the hot pepper one ffs#clearly the best one#though i do respect that og chicken comes in a giant pack called a hungriman and an even bigger one called beliful
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Dp x dc idea 159
Danny is being hunted. Both his parents and the Giw. They all think he is a villain so he might as well be one.
He’d just choose who he’d be a villain for.
By then he had one choice. The flash. That man seems to care about his villain . He doesn’t think the man would let one of his villains be tortured or experimented on.
After his recent escape from the parties hunting him he sets out for central city. He’d just be a villain to an actual decent person instead.
I’m personally imagining him still a teen and doing the most mundane crimes. Just using his powers enough the cops can’t do anything to stop him.
#dpxdc#instead of asking for help#Danny on his infinite teen wisdom decided to play that part#he’ll be flash’s villain#clearly that’s his best option#flash taking one look at the situation#and going this isn’t right#right away knows something is up
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Assisting Acquaintance Acquired.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wen ning#wei wuxian#Ignore how Wen Ning's hair looks here because I messed it up. Let's pretend he just sported a different hair style for a brief moment.#I am not exactly great at consistency but I am trying very hard to work on that (immediately messes up again).#Absolutely *love* how Wen Ning clearly remembers and admires WWX...who does *not* recognize him.#This is the best day for Wen Ning and it means *nothing* to WWX. A painful one-sided crush made worse.#It is bittersweet to realize that we care about someone more than they care about us. Sometime we pour love into a relationship-#-with someone who just can't reciprocate. It isn't always a conscious things either. Some people just aren't aware we care.#And painfully - so painfully - You can't make them aware. No act of kindness or gift or self sacrifice will make someone care about you.#You can martyr yourself for someone and they will continue on unchanged.#I think a lot about the parallels between WN and LWJ. Not foils - just reflections. A theme repeated.#People who give so much of themselves to someone who doesn't have the capacity to give any part of themself away.#I will die on the hill of 'Wen Ning would be the love triangle romance if that trope wasn't being avoided'.#And to be honest - thank the stars above that is the case. I do not know any good love triangles in media.#We are skipping some of the sad Jiang Cheng content because I really want to finish season 2 before May.#Sorry JC emo moment lovers...I'll deliver another time.
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even if loki and mobius’s relationship isn’t, or never is romantic, i still love how important it is just for loki to have a friend. a real friend, someone who he feels comfortable casually touching and approaching when one or both of them is in a bad mood. someone who he can sit in comfortable silence with, someone who he knows how to read, someone who knows exactly how to read him in return. this is loki, who grew up alone and unwanted, who constantly competed with his brother because he never felt like he belonged, who learned how to close himself off from everyone else in the world. who learned how to be prickly, defensive, evil, because no one ever saw him as anything else. because he was told his birthright was to die as a child, and that he should be lucky he gets to beg for scraps at odin’s table.
this is loki, who’s never been friends with anyone who didn’t want something from him. who’s never been real friends with anyone at all. and for the first time, we get to see him just existing. comfortable with another person, laughing with another person, sharing his thoughts and feelings with another person like he hasn’t been alone for his entire life. and it’s really, really nice.
#loki#lokius#clearly i am in my Feelings today jfc#but honestly loki and mobius’s friendship is one of the best things marvel has ever done#it works so well and they have such insane chemistry together
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he would not say that, podcast/book edition:
#thin martins....#joos yaps#now that this post has a few reblogs: its fun to read the tags#most fun ones are where its clearly personal taste#ill add a few more petty ones of my own;#elias does not have eye earrings. he has eye cufflinks at best otherwise he dresses like the boring bureaucrat he is#used to be for emo/grungy jon but i was worn down and will now begrudgingly accept it as a phase in uni#(though he was Not In A Band. i stand by that)#for all of the latter ones i hope its clear i dont personally mind if people make fanworks which disagree. but they're wrong/j#thin martins are annoying on another level which ive gone into before and wont do now#oh right blond hair/blue eyed martin. no.#and any jon with a small anime nose isnt jon#again want to be clear: apart from thin martin this is all a matter of taste and in good fun plz keep drawing ostentatious eliasses
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Not the son you were looking for
The Fentons were sure that their son was dead. They didn't understand why Phantom pretended to be their little Danny, nor why he made so many illogical excuses like "being a hybrid" and so on. At first they played along, but they were angry, angry that the truth was being kept from them, angry because they were sure that the supposed hero had done something to their son, and he even managed to trick Jazz!
It all made sense when Phantom was declared Ghost King, of course, he surely had Danny captive! It shouldn't be hard for the King of the Dead to manipulate a soul, maybe he was gaining power from that. They were sure, they had seen the King argue with one of his ghost-capturing devices and keep it always guarded, a big secret surely.
Unfortunately for them, the GIW had disbanded, so they had to turn to their second choice: The Justice League. It was an organization of heroes that had only recently formed, but the Fenton's were sure they would help them, so they contacted them and explained the situation. The League was skeptical but when they heard that a child might be in danger they acted immediately.
They didn't confront the King directly, they weren't idiots, but they stole the thermos, willing to give the child trapped in it a break. They could deal with the Ghost King later.
Unfortunately for everyone, as soon as the Fentons hit the "release" button what came out was not their son's soul, no. Dan Phantom watched them with a wide grin, free for the first time in years. The League had a feeling they had made a grave mistake.
#dpxdc#ghost king danny#revelation goes wrong#kinda#The Fentons pretended to believe Phantom and he thought everything was fine#They never really believed it#They thought that Phantom had killed Danny and was using his appearance#Which doesn't make sense but they are concerned parents ig#dp x dc#dc x dp#Danny kept an eye on the thermos to make sure Dan didn't escape#It was a king's secret but a good one#The League believed the Fentons because all ghost information was erased#courtesy of Technus#Many were skeptical because it was a whole kingdom and it was very likely that the scientists were wrong#but upon hearing about the trapped child they decided to give them the benefit of the doubt and rescue the kid#they didn't face the Ghost King because he was clearly more powerful than them#instead they stole the thermos in a moment of carelessness#Clockwork knew it but he thought it was for the best#The League released Dan into the world#and the Fentons got their son back#just not the son they were looking for
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Favorite animal/animal you want us all to see?
Here is a toad tum. Pretty therapeutic, I think.
#and lord knows we all need therapy#frog#toad#animals#wildlife#cute#amphibian#Bufo bufo#no animals were harmed in the taking of this tum photo#check out those amazing inner and outer metatarsal and metacarpal tubercles#the whitish blobs at the base of the ahnds and feet#so strong!#clearly a good digger#as is indeed the case#answers by Mark#very-gay-alkyrion#I do not do favourites in asks#I cannot choose one#but this is perhaps the next best thing
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it’s a love song
#do not know how i feel about this one folks but once again i shall post it anyways#i love u hadestown <3 one of the best musicals ever#trevor zegras#jamie drysdale#nolan patrick#travis konecny#claude giroux#danny briere#mike richards#jeff carter#philadelphia flyers#i always overthink these but#i remembered about brioux literally seconds before posting this so clearly i didnt think about this one too much#mere.png#hockey poetry
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I think one of my favorite stupid details the Twilight Guidebook gave me is the fact that the Volturi spread rumors and myths about vampires to keep people off of their tail... so that has to mean a conversation like this had to have happened:
Caius: Okay, so we need to perpetuate false myths about vampires to keep us hidden from humans. Who's got any ideas?
Chelsea: How about we need permission to enter a home?
Caius, writing it down: That's good. Who else?
Heidi: We have fangs.
Caius, still writing: Great, what else?
Jane: We don't have reflections and... we sleep during the day?
Caius: Perfect, and I'll say that holy symbols harm us.
Marcus: Wood stakes though our hearts kill us.
Caius: You know what, sure, on brand.
Aro: And we have a weakness to garlic.
Caius: ...what?
Aro: Weakness to garlic.
Everyone: ...
Aro: Write it down.
Caius, sighing: Fine.
Aro: And we can turn into bats.
Caius: ...
Caius: Aro are you drunk?
#i clearly know best this is canon#one of those dumbasses brought up garlic and you fucking know it was aro#twilight#the twilight saga#the volturi#caius volturi#aro volturi#marcus volturi#jane volturi#heidi volturi#chelsea volturi
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Weiss + Understanding her friends
#rwby#rwby9#weiss schnee#yang xiao long#ccyy edit#weiss#yang#and to be real I am just lazy and don't wanna tag everyone#this clearly took FAR longer than I thought it would#any way weiss is the best and I really hope one day we'll address her feelings about losing her home
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#psychonauts#crispin whytehead#fred bonaparte#nightmaretheater#Hello Tumblr Pls Let Thist Post Go Thru Again#anyways. 11 or so hours on canvas. One of my best pieces so farrr Eeeehehhehehehe#Anyways fred definitrly put crispin thru electroshock . Thats how they treated mental patients back then.#I think fred should be a little evil. Makes his character more interesting#as someone in my server pointed out#both edgar and crispin are scared to see him out of his straits. Clearly hes not as good as we think#even if he had good intentions he clearly mistreated the patients#plus the way he so loudly and rudely calls crispin an inmate…. Ew#He most certainly didnt think of his patients as equals#I guess its karma he became one of them
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I really do think it's interesting that the way DE discusses ableism gets ignored by a lot of the fanbase. Because Harry is undeniably disabled and that's a core conflict of the game. He's living in an impossible situation that so many disabled people get caught in; he's physically disabled, even more so by the end of the game after being shot, but even at the beginning of the game he struggles with nerve damage, post-polio syndrome, partial paralysis in his jaw, withdrawals, and that's not even starting on the mental illness. He is sick and cannot ever properly heal under these circumstances because he cannot stop moving forward or he will start to sink. He's living in poverty. He has no safety net. No way out of the RCM. That night in Martinaise before the beginning of the game, he tries to quit- throw everything away. He tries to end his own life and drive his car into the sea because he cannot fathom a future where he's able to get out of this alive when he's so intrinsically bound to this abusive institution that he can't escape from.
And then comes Jean, deliberately forbidding anyone from jogging Harry's memory out of spite and anger, refusing to allow anyone else to help, calling him a fucking idiot and a psychopath, asking if he can go to the toilet on his own, telling him that he doesn't deserve his disability pension because it should go to cops who gave a shit instead (nevermind that Harry has been working at burnout pace for years, he's an addict so his contributions are essentially worthless, right?). He has a conversation with Judit, right in front of Harry, on whether or not he has learning disabilities.
This guy is a very interesting character! And I'm not denying that he's likely dealt with consequences at work from Harry's illness. But he also fulfils the narrative role of being a mouthpiece for the suspicion and even outright aggression that addicts face even while trying to recover. He fulfils the role of a representative of the RCM, with the ability to approve or deny Harry’s return and in turn essentially sentence him to a slow death in the seaside village. He is not there to help; he is there to judge and observe, and then blame Harry when things go bad even though his inaction is at least in part responsible for the deaths during the tribunal. And this is all very deliberate! The RCM, and by extension the Coalition, as an organisation is failing both its officers and its citizens- Jean, by extension, is one of the officers being failed! They are underfunded, overstretched, overworked, and shouldn't even exist in the first place. The expectation on partnered officers to provide emotional support to each other is ridiculous. But instead of directing his anger upwards towards the Coalition airships or superiors at the RCM, he directs it outwards, towards 'the liberals' or towards Harry, who as a disabled addict is a pretty convenient punching bag.
His vitriol towards Harry is not supposed to be sympathetic! At least the way I read it, you're not meant to look at him and think 'oh wow Harry's struggle has been so hard for him.' You're meant to question his language, to think more deeply about how society treats addicts, how punitive measures are never going to help someone get sober, about the importance of safety nets.
#disco elysium#idk man its the social murder game people keep saying this#this is not to say that youre never meant to sympathise with jean or question Harry's actions either#like clearly pre-martinaise harry did some pretty terrible things that's undeniable#but can we do some more blaming the occupying government and structural issues for Jean's issues#and less villanising one of the best portrayals of addiction that ive seen in a long time?#please?#harry du bois#personal#suicide tw#DE rambling
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#poll#truly the most stimulating task for a self proclaimed evil genius: hunting down women who went to the same middle school as this one guy#ok but yeah. whats the best option here#itd be funny if he just lied. or if he was like 'oh i did kill every woman he was close to' (<- true. techincally. he killed all 0 of them)#i mean i went back and looked. theres no background rebel who is Clearly A Woman#which doesnt mean theres no women rebels#but. given the track record.#a single girl ofa user. a single girl nomu named 'woman'.......#how much credit do i really want to give#(i mean UNLESS the leaks this week show more? and we do get rebel girls now?? thatd be nice but idk i havent seen them.)#anyway uhhhhh#bnha manga spoilers
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Ongoing idea that the squip can’t control Jeremy while they’re sleeping, so like a week after blocking Michael they start getting dreams about like holding his hand, and they wake up like this every single time.
#this isn’t when he actually realizes hes bi either#it takes like three more months#I like to think it’s their brain being confused about the blocking#like going ‘hold on something is missing. have you noticed that something is missing?’#and Jeremy is like ‘I think this means I’m bi.’#early 2000s teen moment where you think having dreams about your best friend is gay I guess#I think this is honestly one of the most self-indulgent things I’ve posted on the internet and I’m very embarrassed about it please be nice#(clearly an over exaggeration if you’ve seen my main acct)#be more chill#bmc#jeremy heere#michael mell#bmc jeremy#bmc musical#boyf riends#undescribed#my art
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i swear, every week p’au appears on twitter to inform us that gemini and fourth were on that set improvising every single cute ass tinngun moment themselves… like sir, what do you MEAN that first kiss in the park was all gem and fourth’s doing?
the devil works hard but gemini and fourth on the my school president set truly worked harder 😭
#my school president#geminifourth#i mean - it makes sense that their chemistry is SO good when they clearly felt super comfortable playing opposite one another#and i’m so so glad!!!#they did such an amazing job with their characters and their onscreen relationship!!#the best friend to BL couple pipeline never fails lads. it never fails.#show: my school president#rs: gemini x fourth
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So uh. I might’ve found a pattern here.
From The Fellowship of the Ring, “Three Is Company”:
From The Two Towers, “The Uruk-Hai”:
From The Return of the King, “The Houses of Healing”:
Now I know Tolkien hated allegory. And I know LotR is not a copy-and-paste parable about WWII (which he didn’t fight in) or even WWI (which he did). But the man did see war, and so did people he loved, and he had a non-zero amount of trauma, and some of that is gonna make its way into his writing somehow.
And I think his soul might’ve had something to say about soldiers being forced to walk until they dropped from exhaustion.
#lord of the rings#lotr#honestly i think the first quote is the most chilling in this context??#like the second one pretty clearly portrays the horror of those marches#and the third seems like a realistic best-case scenario: you walk until you drop and then a familiar and beloved voice wakes you up#but the first is?? almost desperately happy?? like he’s reaching so far to say ‘no i swear this traumatic thing could be beautiful and good’#‘it could be good!’#‘IT COULD BE GOOD!! I SWEAR’#‘PLEASE JUST LET ME HAVE THIS’#and you get this sense of desperation#like he wishes a tall and beautiful Elf was there to help him and the other exhausted young men up when they stumbled and fell#i dunno if i’m making any sense but it kinda makes my heart hurt#i feel like i’m peeking into an open wound in this man’s soul
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