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apomaro-mellow · 2 years

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Part 3 of Steve Disappearing

Brittney was feeling less good about this as the night went on. There was no way Mr. Eddie was gonna let her babysit again if he found out about this. He was one of the least strict parents she knew, but even he would’ve drawn the line at this. Driving a bunch of kids under cover of darkness to Hawkins seemed like a good idea at the time though. That is until Lucy revealed she didn’t know exactly where to look. Or what they were even looking for.

“Why don’t we go to the sites of the murders?”, Noah suggested.

Brittney slammed on the brakes. “Murders?! That’s what we’re doing here?! I thought we were gonna, I don’t know, go somewhere important to you and your dad.”

“Important....let’s go to the high school!”

Brittney let out a breath. She had been reading books on teenage development (never mind that she was still waist-deep in her youth) so she felt that she should guide Lucy even in her misguided actions. And her dad was all rock and roll and down with authority, so he’d understand if they broke into a school in another town, right?

“The school records would have info on gang activity with students, right? Even if it was just regular fighting, that sort of stuff goes on your permanent record”, Lucy said.

Ashley looked up at the intimidating walls of the school. “This is gonna go on our permanent record if we get caught.”

“Actually, we’ll just go to jail”, Noah said.

“No, you’ll go to juvie, I’ll go to jail”, Brittney said. “So let’s be stealthy, look at those records, and be outta here.”

Lucy was prepared to look for a window to sneak in through, or perhaps try getting in through the roof, when she heard the creak of a door. Somehow, the gym had been left open. What luck!

“Guys, let’s go!”

Not waiting for an answer, she raced for the door, only for it to shut right behind her. There was a bit of light from the windows, but she took out her flashlight too.

“Guys?”, she pointed it towards the door.

She felt a chill creep up her spine and she looked around. It was a normal gym. Just a basketball court and some bleachers. But these places always seemed creepier at night. Lucy wondered if her dads stared down gang rivals here. Then it got so cold she could see her breath. And then it seemed as though that mist was filling the room. And then it turned to black smoke. Lucy rubbed her eyes. It was past her bedtime but there was no way she was this tired.

Then the smoke began to form a figure, first unrecognizable, and then slowly it turned more familiar. From the smoke emerged her father, Steve.

“Dad?”, she gasped. Lucy was in such shock, she didn’t hear the door slam open. “Dad!”, she started to run towards his outstretched arms but someone held her back. “Wha?”

“That’s not your father”, an old woman said.

“Lucy”, Steve called. And it was his voice but also not only his voice but Lucy didn’t know what that meant.

“We’re not falling for your tricks.” Lucy turned her head at the new voice and this one was an old man who seemed like someone she knew but couldn’t completely recall. And he had a gun aimed at her dad.

Steve tilted his head. “I’ve never tricked anyone. I have only ever spoken the truth.” He looked to Lucy. “I am not your father. But I have made him better.”

A bullet went into his shoulder, but it flew through in a haze of black smoke. Like he wasn’t even there.

“You can’t stop me anymore. Not when I have everything that I need now.” And then he melted back into the darkness. Lucy was scared and confused and tired and overwhelmed and it finally all hit her as she fell to her knees and cried out for her dad.

Heavy footsteps pounded the floor.

“Lucy!!” Suddenly she was being scooped up in a familiar embrace as she sobbed. She thought she’d been getting too big to be carried like this but Eddie held her no problem, like she would always fit perfectly in his arms.

“Joyce, chief, thank you so much.”

“I haven’t been chief in years, kid.”

“And he hasn’t been a kid in years”, Joyce said. “You know I take Code Reds seriously.”

Eddie was stroking her hair as he tried to calm her. He had only come in the moment Lucy broke down in tears. He’d have to get the whole story later. Because from their reactions and the tension in the room and the unseasonable coldness of the room, it could only mean one thing. The Upside Down was back.

Eddie sends Brittney and the other kids back. The least involved the better. But he takes up Joyce’s offer to go to her and Hopper’s place for the night. He needs to tell Lucy everything. Now. So he gets started on the ride over, holding her hand as he follows Joyce’s car. Tells her how he was indeed accused of murder when it turned out to be an otherworldly demon doing it. And how that demon was of a realm that Steve had been fighting against years before.

“So...you guys weren’t in a gang?”

Despite the ice that had been in his gut, he chuckles. “Not officially, hon.”

He tells her how they narrowly thwarted Vecna back in 86. He tells her how back when she was nine years old, El and Will both felt something going on and they thought they had to fight one last time. They got to the house and the story paused as they got set up. Joyce made them some tea and told them to help themselves to the leftovers and Eddie continued.

“Your dad, El the Hero, and Will the Wise, all went down there for a final showdown.”

“This has to be the end of it”, El said.

Everyone nodded in agreement. That much was certain. Even if they couldn’t destroy the Upside Down, they could cut it off from their world for good.

“That means we’ve gotta be firm on this”, Steve said. “When we finish this, we get out, no dilly-dallying. And close the gate once and for all.”

“No dilly-dallying? Are we talking about a demon dimension or a trip to Disney?”, Robin teased.

“Steve’s right though”, Mike said. “Whoever goes down needs to be quick. We can’t afford to go slow.”

“And it can’t be too many of us”, Nancy added.

“So who goes?”, Lucas asked.

After many hours of figuring out just who would be taking the dive again (arguing, debating, pleading) the team was decided. The stakes were known, but Eddie had no idea what he could stand to lose until Steve pulled him aside.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen down there. I mean with those two it could be a piece of cake”, Steve said, gesturing to the Wonder Twins. “But anything’s possible.”

“What’re you getting at?”, Eddie asked.

“No matter what happens, once the gate is closed, it needs to stay closed.”

Eddie gave him a look like that was obvious. And then Steve leveled him with a stare of his own and Eddie understood, not that he liked it.

“Steve...”

“I’m not saying it could happen. Just, if it does, if for some reason I don’t make it out, don’t keep the gate open. Don’t open it again. Don’t come looking for me.”

Eddie’s eyes began to glisten, hypotheticals be damned because he knew there was always, always a chance it could happen.

“How can you ask that of me?”

“Because you’re the only one they’ll listen to if it comes to this. Husband rights and all.”

“What about Lucy?”

“Hey, I’m doing everything in my power to come back. But someone’s gotta think of worst case scenarios.”

“So dad’s been stuck in that place since then?”, Lucy asked, having eaten just a couple of bites of her food during Eddie’s story.

Eddie ran a hand through his hair. “Well, the thing is, if he was, El would’ve been able to find him. But she never could. From what Joyce and Hopper told me, you saw Vecna using an illusion of his body as a mouthpiece. Vecna can conjure up visions. But him having you father’s physical body...and somehow...cloaking his entire being so he can’t be found would explain the disappearance. The question now is why did he do that, besides for his survival, and why did he reveal himself now...”

Then Eddie looked to her barely touched plate and his own uneaten food and sighed. “We can figure it out later. Let’s get to bed.”

Tagged

@captain-winter-wolf-aehs

#gonna be honest i imagined the reveal scenes like 10 different ways #im still not sure if im satisfied #but that's what fics are for #maybe in the coming months ill write alternate versions #apo writes #stranger things #steddie #fanfiction #also is this the longest part?#this might be the longest one #i was gonna cut it off with eddie getting there #but i wanted him to finally tell her #captain-winter-wolf-aehs

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localapparently · 9 months

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/ orv epilogue spoilers (read comic right to left)

If only I could turn back time

#orv spoilers #guess! who! finally got around to finishing the epilogue! i was dragging it on for nearly a month #i am fucking distraught #she didnt fucking deserve that ending. she didnt fucking deserve to disappear just like that.#she was the one that saved him. and until her final breath #she just wanted to tell him that it wasnt his fault. she grew up with him. she saw him grow through the comments.#and just like how she saved him. his comments made her love her life a little more too. i cant fucking do this. and shes just gone. she jus #omniscient reader fanart #orv #orv fanart #omniscient reader #omniscient readers viewpoint #kim dokja #doksoo #han sooyoung #hankim #kdj #hsy #crit's art: orv

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michelle-jacksons-art-blog · 15 days

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Try these out!

#my art #fan art #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #nandor the relentless #monster high #draculaura #mh g3 #redrew an oldie #bc I didn't like it the first time and now I love it #she's older than him by like 900 years #but she's NICER and also not afraid to break societal norms that would prevent her from dating a certain group of ppl #and also they're friends #they probably wouldn't be friends #but i think they could talk about how lonely it can get. living for so long. until you meet the right group of people #i think they would tell anecdotes to each other. once Nandor got past the silly relentless warrior act. and she finally got to talk to-#someone closer to her age that didn't look down on her #idk man I just think about characters so much. I want them all to be buddies #AND ALSO THEYRE BOTH ASIAN YAY

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liauditore · 6 months

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it's gotta be you.

#bdoubleo fanart #bdoubleo100 #bdubs #trafficblr #secret life spoilers #traffic spoilers #my art #DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL WANTING BDUBS TO WIN!!#DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL HANDING OFF THE CLOAK TO BDUBS BECAUSE SHE NO LONGER HAS ANY NEED FOR IT!!#DON'T THINK ABOUT HOW BDUBS WHO HAS NEVER TRUSTED HIS ALLIES FULLY FINALLY HAS SOMEONE HE FULLY BELIEVES IN #TO THE POINT OF REFUSING TO BETRAY HER BECAUSE I QUOTE “SHE WANTS ME TO WIN”#DON'T THINK ABOUT PEARL WHO'S BEEN ISOLATED IN THE PAST FINALLY HAVING ALLIES WHO CARE FOR HER #DON'T THINK ABOUT HER TRYING TO RUN AWAY FROM BDUBS AND JOEL ONLY FOR THEM TO ASSURE HER THEY'RE NOT GONNA BETRAY HER #DON'T THINK ABOUT BDUBS TELLING PEARL AND IMPULSE HE DIDN'T THINK THEY WOULD FIGHT THE DRAGON WITH HIM.#DON'T THINK ABOUT BDUBS TELLING PEARL NO. SHE HAS TO WIN. BECAUSE HE CAN'T DO IT.#im so normal im so sorry #cw caps

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chirpsythismorning · 4 months

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Can we talk about how Jonathan might've been able to clock Mike simply because of what happened with him and Nancy in season two?

This will be a long post, so you might want to strap in or save it for later.

In Will and Mike's case, it would obviously be much different from Jonathan and Nancy's situation, given that you know, they're gay. But we still have Jonathan arguably going through a similar experience as Will, while Mike is going through a similar experience as Nancy.

In s2, we see Nancy confront Jonathan about how she waited for him before getting back with Steve, which is a revelation to him. Then they're at Murray's and she's struggling to say she loves Steve, after a handful of moments between them that felt like she might return Jonathan’s feelings. And you can clearly see it in his eyes, listening to Murray imply that they have feelings for each other, with him looking back and forth sort of in awe of what's happening, like he's starting to question if she might actually like him back.

Will doesn't have that same affordance as Jonathan to really hope, at least not anymore. Which is why these relationships in s2 and s4 end differently for these two brothers.

Based on all the signs he was seeing that Nancy felt the same, Jonathan decided to take the plunge to admit to Nancy how he felt, and at that same moment Nancy had the courage to show how she felt. In Will and Mike's case, Will wasn't ready to take the plunge to admit to Mike how he felt, at the same moment Mike didn't have the courage to show how he felt.

What's so painfully hilarious to me about all of this though, is that Jonathan arguably starts the season in the same shoes as most of the audience, where from his perspective, it's becoming obvious to him now that Will like's Mike, but that Mike does not feel the same way.

First at Rink-O-Mania, Mike appears a little uncomfortable upon hugging Will. Then as the happy couple continues on their adventure into Rink-O-Mania, he watches Will lagging behind moping. And then unfortunately he's out of commission for the rest of the evening...

But once he's sober and back to being an attentive brother the following morning, we see him watching them at breakfast, with Mike barely sparing Will a glance, all while Will is blatantly staring, almost like he's waiting for Mike to look back, only for Mike to get up and walk away.

All of these instances gotta be SCREAMING unrequited gay love to Jonathan. He's already gotten signs for years that Will is gay, these are now just the signs that are instilling his suspicions that Will has feelings for Mike. He could have easily interpreted their relationship in the early seasons as young best friends, with Will seeming to have a crush on Mike, and with them growing up and that potentially including Will's straight friend distancing himself from him because he doesn't feel the same. It's not the most unexpected thing in the world considering.

But then there's a shift.

Suddenly he's creeping up on them talking in his room. And we know he was listening in on the conversation because he brings up Owens when he sits down. As he's eavesdropping, he's probably thinking something innocent like Aww they're making up! And like, hey! Even if Mike doesn't feel the same, which is okay and entirely expected honestly, at least he still cares about Will enough to make things right after acting so out of character. Still, I'm not gonna lie, that sounded a lot like flirting to me--

Then he's knocking on Will's door like 30 minutes or less later only to find Mike and Will back on their bullshit. Mike suddenly isn't going out of his way to ignore or put Will on the back burner. In fact, he's on his bed and they're talking, again! The door is even closed this time, which is interesting. This has gotta be a good sign in Jon's eyes. Nothing to worry about! Right? Right...?

But then suddenly this shift continues, going in a direction he probably didn't expect.

I mean, this is literally an identical jancy parallel we have here with byler on the hood of the car, with Jonathan right there to witness it. Despite him maybe only now subconsciously picking up on the similarities between Will and Mike to him and Nancy here, he's at least taking note (I mean he's even got his gay map out and everything).

It isn't until the van scene happens, that I think Jonathan starts to genuinely consider his suspicions, which is that Mike might actually like Will back.

EVERY time we get a shot of Jonathan looking back at Will and Mike in the van, followed by a shot of his POV from the rearview mirror, we're faced with Mike looking at Will while Will is looking away.

As Jonathan is hearing Will confirm his suspicions about his feelings for Mike, he's simultaneously witnessing Mike not looking at Will with disgust, but something more akin to reverence. All of those moments in the van that we witnessed, including all the ways Mike looked at Will and everything that was said, Jonathan was right there.

And what's even more insane about this scene, is that it circles back to Jonathan as a character himself.

I remember when people were talking about how odd it was that we never saw Jonathan with a camera in s4. After 3 seasons in a row of making his passion for photography a big part of his identity, that part of him was apparently absent entirely this time around... But was it really?

This is the same guy that said, "Sometimes, people don't really say what they're really thinking. But you capture the right moment, it says more."

Jonathan might not have had his camera in s4, but this was without a doubt one of those moments where he captured something more.

Something that I also think get's highly overlooked about this scene, especially when it comes to Jonathan looking back at them, being followed by a shot of Mike staring at Will, is that he could see both of their reactions the whole time, from beginning to end. Will nor the audience had the affordance of knowing because Will was facing the other way at the end, while we on the other-hand were blurred from even having the chance, despite Mike literally being in the frame. But not Jonathan. He even lets us see what he sees, a few times, but not at the very end, which would have been nice after they didn't let us see Mike's reaction seconds before this.

Let's just stop right there for a second though and circle back to what I consider to be the first time Jonathan really picked up on Will's feelings for Mike, which was at the end of s3, in a sequence that is a little too relevant to the van scene if you ask me, given that they are almost direct parallels.

While these parallels are pretty spot on visually, they are also near spot on narratively when it comes to the evolution each of these characters are experiencing.

For Will in the first scene, it's sadness that he's moving away from his friends in Hawkins and also feeling like he's losing Mike, after what looks like him and El making up, which makes him scared he'll distance himself again. For Jonathan, it's sympathy for his brother who appears to have some very deep feelings for his friend, feelings he can't quite grasp yet but soon enough will.

For Will in the second scene, it's heartbreak that he has to accept that Mike will never feel the same, knowing that supporting his relationship with El (encouraging it honestly) will likely turn out just as it did last time, with him losing Mike all over again, for the last time. For Jonathan it's sympathy for his brother who has now confirmed his suspicions that the feelings he has for Mike are more than just that of a friend.

Given that this parallel reinforces the same feelings Will and Jonathan had in s3 to now, why would this not also reinforce those same feelings that Mike had in s3 to now?

In the first scene, Mike was visibly distraught, with dialogue from Hopper in the background applying a little too perfectly with what he was feeling in that moment, which was scared. He’s apparently back together with El now, despite them doing just fine as friends for the last 3 months, as well as him and Will just having finally gone back to them being on good terms again. But now, it’s like he’s right back where he started at the beginning of s3, feeling obligated to be the perfect boyfriend to El, and as a result, having no choice in his eyes but to distance himself from Will. Mike then walks into his house looking like a zombie, almost emotionless stepping into his mother's embrace.

Now, I say almost emotionless because it looks like Mike was trying to hold back showing how he truly felt in this moment. He's not crying like he did in s1 when he lost Will that first time. Time has passed and things have changed (he doesn't want things to change). And he's trying his best to keep it together. But the in-focus close-ups make it clear that he is definitely not okay.

What's so impactful about these parallels is that it presents the inner struggle both of these characters are having, both queer and experiencing doubts, but in different ways and for different reasons.

Will is the one who covers it all up with lies, hiding the tears in his eyes, because boys don't cry.

Mike is the one who has never cried to them, just to his soul (RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY! TURN AWAY! RUN AWAY!!!).

If you actually try to get a gage on Mike's in-focus emotions in that first scene vs. his out-of-focus emotions in that second scene, well they're not that far off from each other.

We go from Mike smiling vibrantly at Will, to him now slowly turning away to look back down at the painting, with whatever the hell emotion this is...

It's near impossible to catch because of how out-of-focus it is, but looking a lot closer, it honestly appears like Mike is feeling something akin to sadness that he's trying to mask. For a moment it even looks like he turns his head to wince emotionally, only to correct himself.

And call me crazy, but these shots also low-key parallel each other. Mike looking down trying to keep his emotions in check and failing miserably, only to look up and meet eyes with someone whose witnessing it.

With each shot before this of Jonathan observing Mike looking at Will, with him showing all the emotions Will never got to see and everything else in between, I wonder what Jon saw this time? Probably another thing he didn't expect.

Can you just try to imagine the silence in this van, accompanied by Will's muffled sobs, and then try to imagine Mike turning to look down at the painting, only to sneak a glance, and then go right back to looking at the painting, IN SILENCE, and then try to tell me how the assumption that Mike didn’t notice Will crying makes any sense, like realistically?

Yeah me and Jonathan are confused too.

Right now, Jonathan's probably wondering why Mike was acting a little fruity and repressed during the painting reveal. And that although he may have a penchant for being able to 'capture the right moment', Mike is sticking with his story (despite all the stalling and doubt). He is 100% straight!

And so maybe this is where Jonathan tries to accept what is being presented to him as the truth, despite the contradictions in front of him. It's likely that despite the way Mike looks at Will and acts around him, in ways he would have assumed coming from Nancy in s2 would've been evidence that she felt the same, it probably doesn't apply to Mike.

Maybe Jonathan's ready to accept that it's a lot more likely Will is experiencing unrequited love as a gay kid growing up in a small town, the most predictable experience a gay kid could go through, and in contrast Mike just feels too bad to let Will down easy.

Or who knows, maybe Mike could still be a little bit gay too...

But it doesn't matter anyways. Mike seems to be adamant about this and so there's really nothing else Jonathan can he do besides tell his brother he'll be there for him no matter what. And so he does just that.

But then Mike just has to surprise him one last time.

For those that don't know, the line Mike gives here in his monologue was in part pulled from Will's monologue in the van. Most don't know this because this line didn't make the final cut for the van scene, but in the official script the writers posted, what we find is an almost a direct parallel.

Which makes the reaction shots of Will and Jonathan directly after Mike says this all the more epic.

From Will's end he was probably hearing Mike say this and just thinking 'Damn. Well, that's what you get for using your feelings to inspire Mike to profess his love to El.'

But from Jonathan's end, I don't think his outside POV of these events overlapping was nearly as naive as his brothers understanding of the events. Because why the fuck would Mike need to use Will's feelings to inspire him to profess his love to El in the first place? Is this what Mike has been struggling with? Really? Why before every moment Mike takes action in this scene, is Will's hand literally pushing him into it? Why is Mike being so dramatic about saying I love you, stuttering and rambling about her being a superhero, not saying nearly as meaningful of things as what Will said in the van?

And then it hits him.

Mike is reminding him a little too much of another Wheeler right now...

Nancy Wheeler, who was afraid of what would happen if she accepted herself for who she really was, leading her to retreat back to the safety of Steve. Because Nancy liked Steve, but she didn't love Steve.

And now here is Mike Wheeler, who has went from being incredibly distant with Will after reuniting with El, something that is very unlike the Mike he knew in previous seasons, to something more himself again after they make up, with him looking at Will with adoration after hearing his words in the van, only to turn away and look heartbroken. Mike who is now struggling to simply tell El he loves her with Will right behind him literally yelling at him to do it.

And now it's like all those little moments are starting to add up to Jonathan.

Suddenly all those signs he picked up on from Will when he was younger are now blending in with moments Will shared with Mike. It was Mike who jumped in after him and his mom's speech to Will in the shed in s2, with tears in his eyes recalling the day that they met (without being asked, let alone pushed to). And it's Mike who is now looking like he's at war with himself as he attempts to give encouragement to El, just like he did with Will in s2, but this time he needs someone to push him to do it, and that person just so happens to be Will. After just finding out about Will's feelings and also while assuming El wants him to love her that way still, Mike is stuck.

I don't think it's takes a genius to consider Jonathan is capable of realizing how fucked they all are in this situation.

As much as Mike isn't ready for a sleuth of reasons, Will isn't ready either.

This provides a huge contrast between the bylers ², because while Jonathan and Nancy went through a similar experience to Will and Mike, them being ready to accept it and act on it didn't involve nearly as many factors and risks. Will and Mike also have the added barrier that is homophobia.

Will's internalized homophobia lies in part with assuming Mike could never feel the same based on some of the words he said in their last two fights, with parts being painfully reminiscent of the things his dad and bullies used to say about him. These are also words that contradict Mike's own words and actions from the previous seasons, things that did once give Will hope. The shame and guilt that comes with falling for your best friend, who you now know will never feel the same after being foolish enough to believe it not too long ago, and who might not even want to be your friend anymore upon finding out the truth, is understandable. He can't have hope like Jonathan can. It's just not the same.

Mike's internalized homophobia lies with assuming El wants him to love her, along with their relationship being expected and socially acceptable from everyone around him. Though unfortunately for her he feels abundantly more in love in the moments he shares with Will. Despite trying to make it work with El as hard as he could, because she's amazing and all any guy could hope for in a girlfriend, he can't ignore the fact that the feelings he has for these two people are different. The shame and guilt that comes with you, a boy, falling for your best friend, who is also a boy, and who is starting to show that he feels the same, all while you can't muster up the courage to break up with your girlfriend, nor can you muster up the courage to tell her that you love her, not when she's begging you, dying or even just simply at the end of a letter, is pretty understandable too. He can't have hope like Nancy can. It's just not the same.

Spoiler: They were not ready.

PS: I'm still not over the fact that they low-key confirmed these events elsewhere in the story...

#byler #st analysis #pocketgate #lettergate #i'm aware this is a hot (big brain) take #but i'm like 76% sure mike understood will in the van scene #also why mike is gonna finally be dealing with some personal business in s5...#just want to add that this makes the scene at Nina hit harder #also #mike trying and failing to tell el he loves her or break up with her at surfer boy and stalling because he just can't fucking do either?#mike's face when will pushes him to profess his love to el right in front of him???#honestly i dont think mike would've gone through with his monologue if he didn't think this is what el wanted in large part #i think he thought that if he did break up with her she wouldn't need him at all anymore #or more specifically if told her the truth she might hate him for it and just not want to be in his life in the aftermath of that #this is why he struggled so much with being honest #it was either lie and suffer but get to keep her in his life most likely or tell her the truth and potentially lose her and still suffer #it's just that now he has literally no choice but to conform and be with her all while knowing it's not what his heart truly wants #the heart not being true to himself jumpstarted the apocalypse #everyone act surprised #byler getting jonathan’d in s5 can be something so personal #no but imagine jon getting even more signals mike feels the same 😭#and he tries to talk to will about it but will just gets upset like pls stop why are you saying this?#or imagine him talking about it subtly with Nancy and her being like no way #only to see it for herself #maybe then Nancy would try to talk to Mike about how he’s feeling #idk I could genuinely see byler just getting byler’d individually #but it’s clear at this point Jonathan is extremely suspicious #honestly all I think it would take is him having intel about their previous fights #if he found out mike defended his behavior by insisting that they’re friends…#jonathan would just be like… oh shit.. the first lie…

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thelaurenshippen · 8 days

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the way that silver said "I will stand here with you an hour, a day, a year" to flint and "I will wait a day, a month, a year, forever" to madi....I'm sick to my stomach. who is doing unhinged devotion like this man

#I have no doubt this exact post was made ten years ago or whenever the finale aired #but I'M NEW HERE #black sails #black sails spoilers #lauren feels things #the way that silver is just like...'oh there's a strong willed person who wants to change the entire world with their strong will?'#guess they're my life now!#the way that flint and madi are sooooooo similar #except that silver diagnoses flint perfectly! he mostly just wants to burn the world!#whereas madi actually has true strength of conviction and ideals #and silver #who has been living with james 'my way or the highway but also if you outsmart me I might grudgingly respect you #but my whims are going to be IMPOSSIBLE to understand or track' flint #sees madi and is like 'yeah she'll be mad for a little while but we'll move past it'#and maybe they do! but he soooo miscalculates I love it #also the way that he looks at madi when she is looking at flint after they're all safe #is........so insane #loves her knows she loves him #is obsessed with flint #and yet the fact that madi respects and trusts flint #and that they share so much naturally in their thinking that silver has hard won #drives him craazyyyyyy #ANYWAY I'M UNWELL CAN YOU TELL

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decaffeinatedpartymuggoop · 2 months

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Okay, we all know being a demigod is a shit position. Its scary and gets you killed in really nasty ways. But I feel like being a Big Three Kid has to be the shitiest position in all the shit positions.

Like, imagine being Thalia Grace. Your dad is king of the gods, lord of the skies. Led a war to get rid of a tyrant. And the only thing you get is his scorned wife AND brother, who both try to kill you (with one technically succeeding), a drunk of a mother, and brother who you thought was dead. Oh, wait, he’s not dead! No instead he was used as an offering to appease your dad’s wife and help fight in a war and prevent mass destruction.

Or maybe you can imagine being Percy. Son of the sea god, the stormbringer, the earthshaker. You get to live with a disgusting, abusive man for around 6 years. Who smells like literal shit. All because your scent as a demigod is too strong, BECAUSE of who your father is. You see things that you aren’t supposed to see and do things that people can’t do and go years thinking something is wrong with you. That your the problem. Then you get to the one place where you’re supposed to be save. But! Here is the kicker! You’re not! Your uncles hate you and you’ve been accused of stealing a symbol of power. A series of events that will kick off a war, and guess what. You’re a center point for it. Welcome to Camp Half-Blood.

Mhm, but then there’s Hazel. Daughter Pluto, god of the underworld and riches. But that doesn’t really change anything does it? She’s still living in 1930s America, in a red state. One where confederate flags still hang if you go deep enough into the city. She go to a school where the kids are supposed to be just like her! They still don’t like her tho. She’s got no idea who your father is, only that he left her with a parting gift. Only it’s not really a gift. Sure, she can pull rubies and diamonds from the earth, all worth millions. But anyone who’s ever gonna touch it will die. She lives with her mother, a woman gone so mad with greed it kills her. And Hazel, by the way. Laying dead Alaska, inhaling oil. But it doesn’t end there! She can’t have her mother suffering for eternity, can she? The answer is no. Hazel gets to spend the next 70 years in the Fields of Asphodel. It still doesn’t end! Because when she’s brought back to life, she gets to fight in a war against giants, her sad story seemingly never ending.

Nico’s a son of one of the Big Three, one of the most ancient and most powerful. But most people look at him as something bad, something not worth taking a second glance at. Something too look away from, mostly. He’s from the 30s, spent years in a magical time casino with only his sister at his side. She doesn’t stay for long though, she dies soon after they discover their heritage. And he doesn’t remember his mother much, a name without a face. A face without a name. He survived an attempted assassination at 2, though it wouldn’t be the only time his was life was threatened. He clings to his sister, even though she’s dead. He’s the son of the god of the underworld, is he not? There had to be a way, and there is. Only she won’t talk to him, she seems more concerned with communicating with the guy who got her killed instead. She chooses rebirth, and he decides to lay it to rest. She’s not coming back, and he has a war to fight in. (He gets stuck in a jar and forcibly outed a few years later, but that’s a lot to get into for now.)

Jason Grace is a pillar of New Rome, their golden boy, their American boy. He’s a son of Jupiter, a natural born leader. He’s been at camp for as long as he can remember, he wants to be praetor soon. He’s had a rocky start, but maybe he’ll be one of the lucky ones. Retire a veteran and live a long life with Reyna in New Rome. Only that never happened. He has no idea where he is, there’s a girl holding his hand, and she’s cute but it feels wrong. They get attacked and people come in and call him a Greek demigod, familiar, yes, but still wrong. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t put things into perspective the way it does for Piper and Leo. He’s goes to a quest to rescue Hera, the name sounds wrong. He nearly dies but at least he remembers who he is. He spends the next 6 months trying to get back home, even though he isn’t too sure on where or what home is. He gets there, eventually, but it doesn’t stop there. He’s dragged on quests and battles and fights in the war but at least he survives it, he’s still there. Apollo needs help, he and Piper give him aid. He gets dumped. He doesn’t get to he a veteran in New Rome. Not with Reyna, not with Piper, not with anybody. He doesn’t get kids or grandkids. No, he gets shot down, another demigod buried.

You could be any one of them, really. Pick your poison, but I guarantee you won’t like any of them. Spending years trying to find a place where you belong, where you feel safe. Only for it to never come.

Percy, who, if you really look at the books, isn’t really all that well liked until he’s at least 2 years into camp. Only to then be sidelined because the courages, brave, fearless daughter of Zeus is back from the dead. Nico, the son of one of the most feared and hated gods. Who has death written all over him, who excludes it so much animals can smell it and humans can sense it, who’s been ostracized and pushed off to the side since he was 10. Hazel, who was treated like disease as soon as she stepped foot on camp soil. Who’s gone her whole life looked as something that’s cursed, that will only bring misfortune, a bad omen.

Shit positions, all of them.

#Hazel and Jason make my head spin #also jaosn and Percy #I like how they both in a way didn’t want glory or to be some hero #i don’t think Jason mentions it much but they kids and grandkids mention in BOO is very telling #Percy’s is from the musical but whatever we all know the musical is canon #and show Percy thinking something is wrong with him and that he needs a mental evaluation of some kind is #everything #I’m making that canon now #I’d love to get a Thalia book #a trilogy maybe #first book is her with her mom and Jason + Luke and Annabeth on the run #ending with her dying #2nd book takes place after her resurrection and during the the war #final book is life with the hunters #and how she found peace in a world designed for her to struggle #I feel like out of all of them big three kids she’s the only one who got her happy ending #and in the fandom the hunters have gotten the reputation of being where Rick puts characters that can’t be shipped with anyone #but I really don’t think it’s the case with her #she’s also one of the only demigods where I think her story has come to a close #like it’s done #Percy’s story is almost done too #Nico and Hazel I feel aren’t quite there yet #percy jackson #thalia grace #hazel levesque #jason grace #nico di angelo #pjo hoo toa #heroes of olympus #percy jackon and the olympians

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mattodore · 4 months

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pay attention to theo’s beautiful face and not whatever matthias’s arm is doing... i liked the lighting more here than against the wall

#these are the last screenshots i wanted to edit from the ones i took on the 22nd and had been slowly editing throughout the week #will finally be putting mattodore in their thirties to rest 🙏⚰️#river dipping #echthroi #matthias evanoff #theodore doe #a burning house to live in #ts4 #ts4 edit #simblr #ended up not doing much to these screenshots tbh… i was so into the audiobook i was listening to i kinda just. stared at the wall a lot...#my brain was telling me this wasn’t worth posting bc i’ve done so many mattodore edits recently and this isn’t anything different but.#like i did actually spend a few hours with these edits so. on one hand i’m like this isn’t really anything #but on the other hand i’m like. well they’re my ocs whom i love dearly and i’ll probably enjoy looking back at this #the same way i do all my other recent edits which i open my own blog up to stare at like. multiple times in a day #obsessed atm……..#anyway.#god… matthias is so huge he always takes up so much space i’m constantly having to crop him out of edits 😭#and these are poses that weren’t even made from me…. so he’s not even at his full 6’3’’ height and size like 😭😭😭#he distracted me but that aside... i'm waiting for my game to open up atm so i can get back to tweaking alessandria's sim #her face is gonna take me forever.................................#ik i don't talk about my other ocs on here much anymore but alessandria is my third favorite oc (mattodore obviously being my top two)#so... i'm seriously gonna agonize over every update i make for them now kjdhknjf #ocs with tragic backstories save me...................#i’ll probably spend a few hours with alessandria in cas and then i’m going back to google docs to write more abt mattodore

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catzgam3rz · 11 months

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MORE! QSMP! DESIGNS!

Finally met Tallulah my BELOVED so I whipped up a design for her :D Also updated/tweaked my Wilbur design while I was at it!

#rambles #my art #mcyt designs #mcyt #qsmp #qsmp wilbur #wilbur soot #tallulah #wsmp tallulah #tallulah the egg #ITS SO NICE TO DRAW WILBUR AGAIN LMAO #I am SO happy with Tallulah though I think I may adjust some of her colours in the future lol #oh and she is inspired by an orca for her tail if you cant tell lol #OH and her sweater is actually a sweater I've drawn wilbur in in the past so I like to think she got it from him :)#finally gave wilbur the classic grian/quackity slit eyes like ive been wanting to lmao #jaiden is next to join their crew whenever I get around to drawing her #oh and thats a lmanburg and newfoundland flag on wilbur sleeve :)

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bumblingbabooshka · 10 months

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Hey, Star Trek Writers... -taps the glass-

#star trek #the only people from Voyager's main cast I could see wanting to be a captain are Chakotay ??? maybe? and DEFINITELY Harry Kim #Harry Kim is the only guy on that ship who I'd actually cheer and scream and cry and click my heels if he became captain #bc it's actually something I think he'd be suited for AND it fits with his personality/goals...<3 #like I saw a clip from Picard and like...Seven of NINE??? Why would she want to be a captain?? I think in that case 'making captain' is jus #shorthand for 'we finally accept you into structured society and you're no longer an outcast' which I do NOT like #also Tuvok's a captain???? Why???? Nothing about Tuvok screams captain material or that he'd even WANT to be a captain #I imagine him being chief of security or a professor (or both) until retiring - MAYBE a first officer #OH same with Janeway only she would HATE being an admiral and loves being captain #like next they're gonna tell me that B'Elanna Torres is a starfleet captain* - NO ! she is an ENGINEER!#Sorry I can't get over how bad Tuvok would be as a captain - he's not suited for it and does NOT seem interested #*so that we can all go 'oh yay I accept this as shorthand for the federation accepts her' - HEY #if the only thing you can think of to show that a character has achieved true happiness & respect & peace is becoming a 'respectable' rank #in the future pseudo not-military: maybe think about that more deeply

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lollytea · 8 months

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Huntlow situationship gives me such intense brain termites you don't get it

#no i dont think its because Hunter needs time to heal first #i think if it was up to Hunter they would plunge into a committed romantic relationship immediately after the events of the finale #he would propose to her in like. 3 months probably #i know that sounds intense but i think this is what ''i literally died and came back to life'' mania does to a guy #he is so carpe diem minded hes become a little insane. he wants everything #no more waiting around. no more hesitating. he cant afford to do that anymore #would it have been the wise decision to enter a romantic relationship immediately #who's to say. but Hunter would have done it without thinking about it #its Willow that makes the decision to slow down and wait a while before they make any committments theyre not ready for #i dont think she's entirely learned her lesson about letting herself be emotionally reliant every once in a while #shes made progress but the events of ftf were such heat of the moment responses #once things are semi-stable she still needs to adapt to acknowledging that her feelings for Hunter are like. serious. and scarily intense #so like. yea Willow is slamming her pedals on the breaks for both their sakes. shes thinking about how this would effect Hunter too #but also. she scawwed.#when Willow tells him she wants to talk and she's like ''i think we should just be friends'' oh the face he makes is DEVASTATED #he didnt expect it was going in this direction at all. but like. once Willow explains how this is the most reasonable decision for now #he DOES agree. he understands what shes saying and he agrees that it's the best decision to take a breather before they jump into a romance #anyway even when theyre not officially dating the flirting continues insistently. they are very obsessed with each other and cant stop #Willow keeps trying to insist to herself that its just messing around. nothing serious. they find each other hot. its fine to kiss a little #but Hunter makes it very hard when he looks at her with big brown labrador eyes. looks at her like shes the entire world #i think if it was up to Willow they would have been trapped in that uncertain limbo forever. shes too scared to take the plunge #even if she wants to. she badly wants to #but Hunter just wont let that happen. every so often he says ''im ready whenever you are''#he makes his intentions very known. he is not the shy boy from Camila's house anymore #Willow cant just playfully flirt with him without worrying that hes gonna reciprocate. he talks now. he expresses himself #shes a little afraid of that. but she adores it too. he makes her feel safe but also he wont let her stay in this comfort zone #hes giving her the push she needs to pursue this relationship. gives her to push to feel like she can go after what she wants #because god knows HE knows what he wants #they make me so insane

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quietwingsinthesky · 14 days

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people are saying he « led her on » because he did. the fact that he kissed her in the first episode set the tone for the rest of the season and if you can’t perceive the flirting I’m sorry but how?? he didn’t make anything clear he sent the craziest mixed signals in the world. there’s nothing revolutionary about claiming that Martha was being pushy toward someone who was clearly not interested it’s 1) weird to claim in what it suggests about her 2) factually not true.

I wasn’t gonna respond to this at first because the top half of this ask is pretty much just individual interpretation and I don’t really care about it. Like, no, to me, the Doctor doesn’t seem especially flirty towards Martha. He’s just sort of Like That. That’s his damage, you know, Mr. I need to traumadump on anyone who tolerates being around me for more than five minutes. Mr. If I don’t develop an intensely codependent emotional bond with the companion I have currently I’ll die. It doesn’t read to me as him trying to lead her on because that bit’s honest, and he does it with damn near every companion he’s ever had.

And if nothing else, because we do see Ten when he tries to flirt intentionally and he’s a fuckin dork about it. Kind of guy who looked up romance in the dictionary and took notes. Kinda guy who draws diagrams to maximize kissing potential. It would have been obvious even to me (<- romance-blind as all fuck) if he was flirting with Martha on purpose because he’s not smooth at all; he flirts like he’s gotten lines in a play and he’s super excited to be the main star.

But anyway, as I was saying, that’s just how I see it. And if you see it different, no skin off my back, I just disagree.

But I take umbrage with you putting words in my mouth. I never said Martha was pushy towards him. Because yeah, she’s not. If I implied that she was, then it was a result of poor phrasing on my part. Martha’s not at fault for what she feels, for wanting there to come something of it. No more at fault than the Doctor is for not returning those feelings. It’s a bit weird that you’re assuming that I think one of them has to be the bad guy here when that was the opposite of what I was saying. My point was: When it comes to their romantic subtext of their relationship, it’s weird to pretend like either of them are to blame for them not being in a relationship at the end of s3, and even weirder to assert that as part of why Martha supposedly wouldn’t like the Doctor afterwards when they’re. friends. they continue to be friends into s4.

Martha’s not pushy. She has a crush on her friend. It happens. He doesn’t return it. This also happens. Both of these facts are pushed to the extreme because he’s a time-traveling alien with poor emotional skills and she’s put herself in the position of needing to help him from minute one of meeting each other. That’s why it’s fun to watch, because the Doctor is both so open and so unavailable in turns, because Martha’s feelings for him grow and change as she knows more about her Doctor until she decides to step back.

I don’t know, man. You seem to be coming at this as if one of them has to be The Problem™️. I don’t think either of them is, not so definitively. I think boiling their relationship down to that is reductive and an insult to the way they both grow over s3, to Martha’s choice to continue to be his friend while also establishing her own boundaries, to the fact that the Doctor is able to let her go without immediately trying to kill himself afterwards when she’s not there to catch him.

#the thing about the doctor is that if you want to tell me that he’s Extra Special Flirty With This Companion.#i dunno. feels like something that requires a lot of proof lmao. because the doctor is a freak who latches onto people like a barnacle and #gets way too invested way too quick and holds on like he’ll die if he even thinks of letting go. he’s just like that. he’s just like that.#he’s like that with rose he’s like that with martha he’s like that with donna amy clara bill!!!! these relationships are all different but #the common core is that the doctor is a freak! the doctor clings on too tight!!! the doctor will fuck you up he loves you so much!!!#idk! is it more leading on for the doctor to kiss martha to pull off a plan than it is for him to reshape amy’s life around him on accident #and then show up when she’s an adult to finally whisk her away. or to let clara do emotional infidelity with him for months while #insisting that he’s not her boyfriend. i don’t think ever he is. i think he’s just like gravity. mavity. you’re gonna orbit him because he’s #something cosmic and unknowable. and he’s also your best friend. he’s always too much and too tangible all at once.#am i making any sense here.#ask #martha jones #the doctor #tenth doctor #doctor who #idk man its like 7 in the morning where i am im not awake enough to talk martha/ten semantics. personally i think they should have made out #on screen even more without ever clarifying the nature of their relationship so that they had even weirder and more complicated feelings #about each other.

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