my former therapist told me "everything you are and become and will be is something learned; you cant be something if you didn't learn it somewhere. nothing is inherent about anyone, except for something genetic" and honestly it is still messing with me on some level

My Thoughts on Episode One

Keep in mind that these are just my thoughts that I've written down as I watch the show, they may change or I may expand on them later.

"Former Jedi Knight Ahsoka Tano-"

Bitch, she was never Knighted! She was a padawan!

I see we're already starting off strong /s

Although, I will say, I'm glad they put "the EVIL Galactic Empire" because the way some people talk about the Empire is like they're trying to make it seem like it wasn't that bad---at least this shuts those bootlickers up. So, silver linings!

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Ngl I think Dave Filoni was trying way too hard to recreate the "hallway scene" with Darth Vader in Rogue One and failed miserably.

Also, if people keep referring to Ahsoka as a "Jedi" throughout this episode, I may or may not explode.

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"The Order doesn't exist anymore."

And I am once again reliving Order 66 and crying, thanks a lot.

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"Let's just say I didn't follow 'standard Jedi protocol.'"

Given what we see of her interrogation tactics in that one TCW episode with Luminara, as well as Anakin's tactics, when not following "standard Jedi protocol" ...I'm more than a little concerned by what Ahsoka means by this. Did she torture Morgan? Did she take Morgan's mind apart like Maul did to Jesse?

C'mon Ahsoka, what did you do that wouldn't have been standard Jedi protocol?

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"They seem to have abilities like you."

Hera, you were literally basically married to a Jedi and you were also captured by Maul at some point, Kanan talked to you about this stuff and you experienced it...you know what a Sith is.

Ahsoka, you also know what a Sith is.

They're literally wielding red lightsabers in the holo.

Why are both of you acting like you don't know this?

Also, why is Hera talking like she wasn't literally at the battle of Lothal and like she also didn't know of/have beef with Thrawn?

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Once again with calling Ahsoka a Jedi.

Also, Ahsoka has always said "I am no Jedi' or said that she isn't a Jedi anytime someone has called her that since she left the Order, so why isn't she denying it now?

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LOTH CATS OH MY FUCKING GOD-

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Ok, I know Ezra's recording is supposed to be this really emotional spurring moment but like...

1. The dialogue feels so utterly flat- (so far most of the dialogue has felt that way for me tbh, it's like...none of the characters are really talking like the characters, yknow? And it all just feels so stilted, like they don't know themselves or the people around them).

And 2. Ezra wouldn't have had time to make a recording??? Him taking out Thrawn was a spur of the moment decision, they didn't know everything was gonna happen the way it did, so how exactly did he make this recording???

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FDSLKJALJHFJA IT WAS A NIGHTSISTER TEMPLE???

MORGAN IS A NIGHTSISTER???

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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"Ahsoka Tano's former apprentice is on Lothal...you're looking for Sabine Wren."

I assume this is gonna be explained later, so I'm attempting to hold in my judgement---but since when did Jedi start taking non-Force-sensitive apprentices?

Kanan taught Sabine how to use the Darksaber so she wouldn't hurt herself and so that she would let go of her fear/anger/pain so she could face her family---so why in the world was Ahsoka teaching her, and since when is taking a Force-null as an apprentice a thing?

I'm just so confused.

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"There is nothing easy about being a Jedi."

AHSOKA HAS SAID REPEATEDLY THAT SHE IS NOT A JEDI, WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM????

Also, again, since when can Force-nulls become Jedi?

I'm assuming that they're taking the "Sabine is Force-sensitive" route for this, even though it's very weird considering she never showed signs of it in Rebels, but I still feel like they should've already revealed that if that's the case---because right now it's just confusing.

If they don't go that route then I genuinely already hate the route this is going as far as Jedi stuff goes.

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"Anakin never got to finish my training. Before the end of the Clone Wars, I walked away from him...and the Jedi."

*long sigh* not this bullshit again.

Ahsoka he literally helped Palpatine commit genocide against the fucking Jedi---that was probably a bigger factor in you not finishing your training than you deciding to take some time to figure yourself out. Seek therapy, please.

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I'm gonna be honest, this lightsaber battle between Sabine and the apprentice is...so disappointing.

To be fair, though, I've been disappointed by every lightsaber duel since everything set in the Prequel era---nothing can really live up to those duels.

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Since when can people live through getting stabbed with a lightsaber, without drawing on the Dark Side?

Sabine should be fucking dead, like Qui-Gon was in TPM.

And before anyone says- "oh it's the end of the episode, you don't know if she's still alive" -yes I do, because I already know she's in episode 2.

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My thoughts on episode 2 will probably either go up tomorrow night or sometime this weekend, I don't know yet because I'll be moving into my dorm tomorrow.

Already though I can safely say: my expectations were literally in the ground and I'm already disappointed.

how did you arrive at your progressive punk christianity outlook after being immersed in conservative christianity?

ooh!! good question. see I don’t really think what I was immersed in was particularly conservative—in circles I’ve been around we’ve always dissed Americans for being conservative (kinda mean I know) and my dad used to take me to climate change protests in the 2000s and I was always taught the 6 days of creation aren’t literal, the rapture isn’t real, women in stem etc. idk how it was anywhere else but the part of sydney I grew up in was just Like That, there was encouragement to give to the poor to actually end poverty and people actually did even though none of us really had heaps and I guess I wasn’t raised to be okay with entitlement but simply be kind to everyone? And I didn’t even know what conservative was until I was maybe 17 (I thought it was a style of fashion for ages and then I thought it meant conserving nature and history). It was always just Christians are meant to be genuinely kind and not have sex til you’re older and preferably married yknow?? and work hard, like the protestant work ethic was def a thing but somehow in a non ableist way as much as this is possible— I get real impatient with people bitching about stuff getting taken away from them, not realising how much they have when I probably have less and I’m usually giving away as much as I’m able and as much will put me in a state of perceived danger. It’s definitely a form of rebellion against them to see how little I can survive on which I’m working on. I also didn’t even know that so many Christians were transphobic like I thought it was only the extreme theobros. I also had a really lovely geography teacher in high school who was also a Christian and used her faith to drive environmental action, my biology teacher was a Christian and stood up for trans rights and I also had acccss to the internet to read up on clobber passages and hear peoples stories and it was always like ‘oh yeah some Christians believe different things based on how they read this stuff’ and I don’t think it was until I was old enough to actually vote and saw what propoganda was going around I really realised the power dynamic behind it, with the rise of the Australian Christian lobby which felt like it was straight out of the US. I fully thought voting was just liberals if you like fossil fuels, greens to save the environment, and labor if you’re a people pleaser and like fun little rhymes like ‘Kevin 07’ and attempting to be feminist but not really getting anything done. I actually met Martyn Iles once and was like ‘damn this guy is a fake Aussie this isn’t how we do Christianity’. I also got super burnt out by how hard and how biblically I tried to love my classmates on top of the Protestant work ethic about my schoolwork I never really cared about for myself, and was well versed in theology enough to be like HA! Grace means that we don’t have to do all that and can just do our sustainable best, still thinking my view was mainstream. I went to uni to study enviro sci at 17 and I thought my convictions to not drive unless Absolutely Necessary were driven by Christian ethics (which they were, how rigid I was with it was a pda response though). Then over the years realised very belatedly how people often didn’t validate my views and experiences and I’d expect they would (bc they were biblically rooted) and got quite hurt when they didn’t. Spent years in different volunteer ministries trying to put together the kind of community talked about in books like Philippians only to constantly be let down and feel isolated and that only driving me to work harder, despite knowing God’s grace meant I didn’t have to feeling like I couldn’t stop while my earthly needs for connection were unmet, saying yes to things I’d previously said no to because I got a sense of temporary community and belonging every time I joined a new serving team. Tried extra hard to make places inclusive and expected everyone else to be working as hard on it as I was and feel the desperation like I did and got super hurt when they didn’t, oh I guess I’ll have to do it all myself then.

I’ve always struggled with the concept of hell, tbh I heard about it way too young and never had a drop of self preservation instinct in my body only didn’t want to let God down by saying no. I’ve particularly always struggled with the whole urgency motivation like I’m trying, I’m doing the best I can, I listen to people and actually speaking the gospel into their lives in a way that hits home for them (bc I was thinking about how to do this in an empathetic and understanding and autonomy respecting way from a Very Young Age like I used to attempt to evangelise on moshi monsters to get an idea) and shit, I’m like 19 years old at this stage and I’m tired. If only I could just have one last hurrah to change places with someone so they can go to heaven instead of me? Id take it. and I basically worked myself to the point of being that suicidal and kept fucking going because God made me good at science so I can save the planet and end world hunger, and I had this conviction to contextualise (this is what we learned at afes btw) the gospel to really be real to queer folk and indigenous folk and other people of colour and marginalised people (it’s easy to see oppression with my background and my neurotype tbh) and maybe I could make myself suffer now bc God wasn’t gonna let me do that for eternity? anyway eventually left afes bc I was being so stretched and getting so isolated and the work I was doing there wasn’t achieving any of these things and I realised if I stayed I might end up dead and I wasn’t ready to go to heaven yet when my work wasn’t done. or at least so constantly dysregulated I wouldn’t be as able to be kind to others and show them the gospel.

around this time I’m also putting together a pretty comprehensive framework for how to actually solve global problems in a productive way, I’ve unpacked the pride in a lot of Christian mission projects and how they often were a feel good thing but not actually respectful or effective and I’d come up with literally hundreds of ideas for projects I could do to actually help, none of which I obviously had time for I think I was working up to 3 jobs while studying and serving in church and doing my hobbies that kept me kind of sane as well? which was discouraging to say the least, driving a kind of rageful resentment. Around that time I also discover PDA and my whole life makes sense, I start on my adhd meds which I had to jump through a million hoops to get and realise maybe I can finish uni.

a pda framework as I dive more into that and how to be actually neurodivergent affirming and actually recover from burnout long story short makes me realise how ableist much of our concept of sin and holiness really is and how much we need to destigmatise sin and stop using it as a way to intellectualise actual things happening in our brains and nervous systems and maybe we’d feel a lot less hopeless about it like it’s some big mystery if we actually did unpack the fear and threat responses and trauma behind it. Which we always say we will do but practically, church doenst give a space to do that bc you’re gonna be shamed. even for the people who are non affirming I’d be like, but isn’t it a logical step to someone who’s not yet been convicted to celibacy (if that’s something they think they should be) and realised this whole thing is unrealistic, not because the bible is wrong but because people think you can control your own brain by simply trying and trying again every time you fuck up as if that’s not gonna drive learned helplessness or actually traumatise you when you so desperately want to do better? Either that or drive you to be numb about it which I realised is what usually happens, there are certain sins people are blind to in every congregation and they’re actually intellectually unable to be convicted of that as sin because they’re stretched as far as they can go covering all other bases and being like ‘Christ covers that I didn’t Choose To Sin I’m trying not to even though it doesn’t really work’ like I’m a solutions person. if something isn’t working we’re gonna think of a new method and suddenly I understand how my brain works and those of so many others especially those who feel marginalised by the church!

and so long story short when I eventually had to quit what I was doing at church because someone cared enough to realise I hadn’t been doing well for years I was like I’m gonna follow this urge of the Spirit or simply my own head and desire for true connection I often found In exvangelical spaces and hear as many experiences as possible and use it to shape my worldview and get a bunch of hope from people who yes they’ve been marginalised but the gospel is real to them. that’s my only criteria I’m not gonna judge based on theology and I’m not ever gonna think my theological takes make anyone else wrong I’m just gonna be open to listen and shape them so there isn’t any cognitive dissonance and the grace found at the cross is real and practical and doenst have weird arbitrary limits, and I’m also gonna listen to those hurt by Christianity who some might judge as being hard hearted but I know how trauma works. and I’ve been doing that ever since, gradually getting there more and more and I think the best/funniest thing is even in more conservative spaces literally everyone I still talk to has been super encouraging of it and if we have any disagreements they’re pretty minor compared to the fact that we all believe the gospel is for everyone and we all wanna invest in social justice too (which makes me question how conservative those spaces ever were tbh). like there’s def parts of my story I won’t always tell but I feel like I come with a perspective people respect these days no matter where I am, and that’s nice in contrast to being that weird kid trying to do adult things being told either not to worry or that I don’t understand.

I honestly love the delancey bros like they're lowkey bad people but I love them. gently holds. (some of the emotion reading may be off, idk man got a touch of the tism I'm bad at this)

I already spoke abt them in another post but now I'll do it again (off the top of my head)

So. Both their parents were out of the picture, father left them in the refuge and shit. They get paid to basically do dirty work I guess (eg. beating ppl up) because they're scary fellas yknow. They beat up the trolley workers for striking (one was their father) and as Oscar says "Guess he didn't take care of me"

Next. During Carrying the banner: the gate scene. Oscar has hit bit with Race where he shoves him and stuff, but Morris specifically only kinda dived at the bars after Race (and the rest of the Newsies) insulted him and Oscar. "You want some of that too? You lousy Cr*p" No Morris don't say that. In Jack's words, that's not nice. But. He only did it after Oscar shoved Race, making me think maybe he only did it because he thought they were gonna get in a fight or something? Obviously he could've just done it for the sake of it but still.

Next. So it gets to counting the papers and shit and it looks like Oscar flinches a little when Jack kinda lunges towards him. I like that detail. Also Oscar making that awkward ass face when he's giving Crutchie the papers is brilliant

Next. Before the world will know. When Davey is talking about his mum. THEIR FACES HURT. The way Oscar looks so sad, and Morris looks more. idk like angry? like still sad, but angry and I guess protective? Then again, Oscar flinches when Jack hits the box.

Next. Before Seize the day, first off they're idiots "We got bum word about a strike happening" (It shows Oscar smacking Morris to get his attention to point up at the 'STRIKE' Jack is writing. But also the "My skull busting arm could use a damn rest" It's supposed to be intimating, but added with the brothers past + details about actors portrayal (Specifically Mike Faist and Devin Lewis) it seems more of a defensive thing. Devin Lewis' Morris comes across as Loud=Scary, it seems like he's trying to intimidate the Newsies. Same with Oscar during Carring the Banner

Next. Crutchie getting arrested. Can't excuse Oscar spitting on him, or Morris calling Crutchie a Cr*p. (Going from after Wiesel shows up, because I don't fully remember the little scene before that) When the Delanceys are shown with Wiesel, they look guilty. Probably because they know how bad the refuge is. I also noticed about how they seem to exaggerate things when around adults (I'll talk more abt that further down)

Next. The bottom line reprise. specifically the cellar scene. They seem to yell everything "I've been polishing my favourite brass knuckles (eg.) Or when Morris bangs the press. As I said they seem to exaggerate it all which could be for two reasons.

1. They're dramatic

2. They're making sure the adults hear everything, making sure Wiesel and everyone else can hear that they're doing their job.

They could yell everything or act dramatic to show they're tough, it could just be how they are but it could also be an act to show that they can do their job. They might be trying to show Wiesel that there's no reason for him to fire them or put them back in the refuge.

Next. right before Finale. They both look more relaxed to me, like they're relived to be back to how it was where they were just selling papers and stuff.

Basically I really like looking at the Delanceys as characters rather than Villans, they're just 2 kids (assuming they're around the same age as the Newsies, maybe a little older) trying to survive, and growing up in the refuge has taught them that violence is the way to survive. In my eyes, with all the little background details of when it's just them to (Before + During the World will know) they're just these lonely fellas. I mean, all they have is eachother really. Wiesel only took them out the refuge to work for him. They were being used as goons by him and its not like they could go against him because they'd loose their work and possibly be chucked back in the refuge.

anyway. This was mostly based off Livesies (2017) and what I could remember from a OBC bootleg I watched. (I also haven't watched the 1992 one enough times to speak about those Delanceys, in my mind the Broadway and 1992 are separate characters)

How do you keep track of your pokémon's levels and exp? I've always been taught to do it manually, writing it down and such, but I've come into the knowledge that most people use apps.

which is. Kinda obvious if I think about it.

I’ll be completely honest with you- I haven’t counted my Pokémon’s levels in years

Don’t get me wrong: When I did my gym challenge back in trainer school I did (over a decade ago lol). When I first got my mons I did. I have several journals built up from trainer school to ranger academy days when I did it. And even now the apps I use for work have an exp tracker and all that jazz so I can make sure my team is in shape. But I honest to Arceus haven’t kept up with their actual levels since I graduated my first run at the ranger academy.

I mean my team and I are pretty strong. We made it all the way up to our second elite four member before finally whiting out during our gym challenge. My earliest members have been battling for well over a decade- but when you’ve been going for this long, I’ll be honest, the actual “levels” your pokemon are on doesn’t really matter.

I’d say that they’re more a formality than anything- a way for younger trainers to track their progress and reach certain milestones yknow? And a way to track experience or rank for a formal battle setting so everyone is on some even playing field. I don’t think it’s useless or anything, I’ve just reached a point where I don’t really need it anymore.

I certainly do track my team’s exp gain, like I said up top. A regions Ranger Union usually have their own apps in place for us to use that log exp based on various factors alongside all the other boring work stuff. And there are rangers who register their Pokémon’s levels in the system.

For me tracking exp is like tracking steps taken or miles walked, it’s a good way to check the physical payouts of the day! I mean, levels aren’t even the one true way to quantify a pokemon’s strength (like how a fully evolved Pokémon isn’t necessarily stronger than an unevolved or single stage ‘mon). A good strategy and the right items can just as easily turn a battle outmatched by levels. I’m sure we’ve all seen those people who’ve swept tournaments with a level 1 rattata.

Thank you! I kinda just. Realized i pay for all my own stuff & have for years so whats stopping me y'know. Oh we love to hear about the fall of far right leadership i hope that turns out well & you can get your eventual hrt as well. Oh yeah i never wear swimsuits to the beach typically. Always been with people i dont like or too many strangers for my liking. But i like to find seashells & stuff. Oh? English is such a weird language having a partner to learn from who's fluent is like. Required almost. So im glad you had one. I appreciate when people are chill as long as you try its nice & leaves room for mistakes that'll happen inevitably. Got confused for a moment & the concept of having a birthname you dont have listed in your bio lost me like. What do ya mean you had any different name what. Both mine are easy so i dont have that as a first name problem. Where is tromso? I wish you luck in that fall/winter trips are so nice. I especially love to go camping in them because less people so more space. Oh she just gets all the counters wow. Gonna have to focus on her a bit for sure. I dont know if i have enough for guaranteed kafka but i will probably try. Just to see what happens. If nothing else i hope bronya or welt come home for you. Fontaine is one of the regions im most interested in so ill stick through for it but i might squeeze a break in towards natlan honestly. Chasm was. A pain anyways i do not blame you for skipping it honestly. Thats an average day in warsaw? Wild. Ohhh that sounds like it was a blast please pass belated birthday wishes to avery for me. Hair dye is such a fun thing to do congrats on the red! I wanna dye mine again soon. Eyeliner is a thing i wanna teach myself to do too ive just been. Forgetting a lot

yeah thats very understandable!!! and thank you!! after a long time i finally feel at least a little hopeful ab this countrys future but well see. yeah i have the exact same thing but at the same time drying a lot of clothes is Annoying [esp on camps since thats the main place i actually go into the water on] so i often just put regular clothes over a swimsuit. win-win situation. seashells ARE fun to find but i always forget to bring sth to carry them sjdjflksjf plus its pretty hard to find actually nice ones, over here at least. YEAH god plus the way english is taught in polish schools does NOT help so honestly if i didnt have additional lessons i probably wouldnt have learned anything despite studying for a looooong time. and yeah its that way with almost anything isnt it. AH I DO THAT EXACT THING SO OFTEN i genuinely forget that people Have birthnames. or even names in general i just treat usernames as first names a lot of the time. tromso is the place in norway i was in!! pretty far up north but very charming. thank you!! ahhh i almost never go camping but perhaps One Day..... yeah clara has been my best friend ever since i got her. shes so fun to use. thankies and good luck to both of us!!! already got 106 pulls ready + the 9 more from the login event + 20 days left to grind so while i defo wont get enough for guarantee i think it might be possible for me to get her. honestly the region im most excited for is snezhnaya and thats gonna be the last one released iirc so. still a while until that happens. but at least when/if i come back im gonna have a lot of stuff to check out so thats fun. i unfortunately suffer from having to see everything thats new Immediately so i often speedrun new versions in 3 days and them im like....... What Now........ until the next update and then the cycle repeats. ah i should play more games that arent released this way. but yeah while the chasm was quite pretty imo and the story was. well. it wasnt STUNNING but it was fun. but the exploration aspect SUCKED good lord i hated how i could never quite tell if im in the region displayed on the map or below it. agh. glad thats over. and well yknow how it is with big cities, at least i live in a fairly peaceful part so we dont really have big stuff like that often. i will!! and thanks!! i agree hair dye IS very fun but unfortunately my hair texture makes it really hard for dye to stick so it washes off quickly :'] but alas. and yeah fair jdjfklg i have the same thing PLUS. its annoying i can never get it even

What do you think the defining differences in mannish and elvish cultures from each other?

I think a big one for me is mannish communities is that they have generational shifts, which like means they don’t stay the same for years. Stuff changes all the time, sometimes old stuff comes back but it will always fall out favor eventually. Like I think about how gondorian sindarin probably in practice could be considered a different dialect than normal sindarin because like human language changes over time when alive people speak it. Like I think change is a very big difference between the two

And it’s not a bad thing either. Men change because it’s in their nature and elves don’t bc its theres yknow. (I guess I’m prickly about the idea because it’s a mannish thing in tolkien it’s bad when humans aren’t bad on like sight)

Thank you - this is a fascinating question to examine! I think you’re absolutely right that generational shifts are one major element: they make Men more apt to rapid change, as you say, and they also introduce an element of forgetting that isn’t present in the same way for Elves. Knowledge and memory can be lost in mannish cultures much more easily than in elven ones.

Another aspect is the impatience of Men, and a greater willingness to take risks. As Túrin observes, Elves can wait around hundreds of years for an opportune moment to come; they’ve got more space for estel within the walls of the world. Men, with their briefer lives, naturally want to act and risk and venture to make the world better within the short time span that they have; that’s why the ‘eventually the Valar will bail us out’ perspective, true as it may be, doesn’t connect with Túrin. Elves are naturally more risk-averse: if you act now, you could die (particularly impactful during the years if the Doom when the Noldor expect their deaths to be permanent), whereas if you wait things might get better; for a Man, you’re going to die in a relatively short time one way or another, so why not take some enemies down with you?

This also connects with the previous concept of remembrance and forgetting. Most elves will have experience both of times of good and of evil, of growth and of beauty and of loss, which gives them a longer-term perspective. It’s not the same with Men. A Man who lived during the Long Peace might never be aware of the war at all. A Man who lived during the dark years between the Nirnaeth and the War of Wrath might have no experience of peace. This contributes to greater generational change.

Additionally, there’s an element mentioned in the Athrabeth:

“And we find that [the Eldar] do not understand the saying that goes among men: too often seen is seen no longer. And they wonder much that in the tongues of Men the same word may mean both ‘long-known’ and ‘stale’. ”

Elves don’t ‘get tired’ of things in the way that humans do. Thus may give them greater joy in the world (“there is no weariness in the eyes of the elves”) but I think it would also make them less afaptable and resilient. In the same way that your eyes adjust to more or less light; in the same way that if you hear a steady noise for a long time, or a bad smell, your senses will filter it out, humans can acclimatize to bad conditions; they can put their brains on autopilot and endure. Elves can’t. An elf who is miserable or tormented experiences that intensely, for every moment. Many of the elves who live in evil times retreat to a few secure and beautiful places - in the First Age, Doriath, Gondolin, Nargothrond, Ossiriand; in the Third Age, Rivendell, Lothlorien, or across the Sea to Valinor. They don’t dig in and hang on like Barahir’s group in Taur-nu-Fuin or the House of Hador as thralls in Hithlum. (The Silvan and Sindar elves hanging on in Third Age Mirkwood as it’s slowly overwhelmed by giant spiders and other evil creatures is a striking and impressive exception.) Men can grow calluses, and elves cannot.

On top of these differences in nature, there are the differences in treatment. The Elves are invited to Valinor and learn the origins and nature of the world from the people who shaped it and who existed before it began. Men’s first, and for the most part only, experience of the Valar is the War of Wrath; they aren’t invited, aren’t taught, aren’t protected. They don’t understand the Valar, being far more different from them in experience and kind than the elves are, and the Valar don’t understand them. They need to take things on faith much more than the elves do; and it’s not a great surprise that many of them don’t. At the same time, perhaps because of the lack of such intermediation, Men can have much closer connection to Eru than Elves typicall do. Elves pray to Varda; Men (including the Númenoreans, in their better days) pray directly to Eru, a concept that is - as we seen from the final conversation of Maedhros and Maglor in the Silmarillion - so alien to elves as to be literally unthinkable.

I saw your comic where ven gets down on his knees and calls Sora his liege. Do you have any more headcanons for that?

no shade anon this makes it sound like he’s proposing that’s not the intended readi—

anyways not really, most my thoughts r in the tags. Sometimes you get possessed and make an idea and then throw it on the table and walk away yanno? It’s not an au or anything. a phrase attacked my brain and clawed at it and screamed until I did something about it. Though I’m CONSTANTLY thinking about the wayfinders. I really badly want to know Daybreak-Scala-Twilight Town/Radiant Garden etc history?? Ansem the Wise is (was) apparently king?? Eraqus is of royal descent? Were we like legit feudal there for a while or what? Like HOW feudal, were we. Knights (graduated students) and apprenticeships and stuff fantasy feudal? I feel like Daybreak ran on oligarchy or whatever with like the master kind of in a monarch position. Did Scala do that? Like have a monarch? They seem to have a dark academia oligarchy… aristocracy… thing. Happening. Organization. This is not what you asked for

Anyways. yes. Actually the answer is yes I lied to you. the wayfinders are, barring yen sid who doesn’t seem like the Sharing Information At Will kind of guy, the last living remnants of a dead culture, and I think they’d try to introduce some of it to everyone else. I don’t think it’ll ever be revived the same just like daybreak is not scala is not twilight town but we have holidays (I think they would celebrate the equinoxes! I also think they have a spring holiday where it’s kind of just a celebration of life and how nature relies on other pieces of nature to live like bees need flowers and birds need bees and foxes need birds and worms need foxes and flowers need worms, I think they should have a lot of flower decorations. I also think they have a harvest holiday that marks the end of the year for them as fall is the LAST season and winter the first — like. yknow. out of darkness into a world of light this is how it goes you start in darkness. New Years is in November. This may coincide with the winter equinox holiday (FREE WEEK OF HOLIDAY TIME OFF) I am getting into my headcanons a little much) and important life milestones (obviously visiting a world is a big deal, but I think PICKING a world to keyblade-master-graduate in would be so HARD… not to MENTION picking a world or worlds to celebrate your marriage in!! They have to be symbolic and important to you and willing to host and — and you have to get gifts from each one and—) and history books saved from wreckage and recipes that are more useful because they use things you can gather and, importantly, bonds. I have always thought d-links were kind of funny! It’s exactly what Sora does, just, not, and not for summoning your friends all the time just keeping them in your heart literally? They were all taught how to do that. It must be or have been important. Lots of different kinds of bonds… mastery, acquaintanceship… etc. play the hit ttrpg Interstitial ANYWAYSlove is very important. Loyalty is important. Having love and loyalty as links would be like Yes we are part of each other’s lives now you can talk to me okay! we are here for each other! That’s what he means, ven I mean, he sees it like look I’ve known you for 16 years and in a place where people die a lot and travel a lot I would stick by you and die for you until you no longer need me and then further you understand this right and soras like (100% only seeing the very real implications of this and none of the background that led to this point because he was born in literally regular fantasy the phillippines but small or something) HUH! Meanwhile in the bg all of soras other friends are like yeah that sounds right I could do that but idk if thats appropriating anything or not,

well sorry for lying to you anon but also naw I don’t really have more headcanons about it. Ven’s like 1000 he gets to be a slightly terrifying reminder that all of these things are much, much older than you and you can’t possibly understand them not because you can’t know them but because you can’t Know them, you were not there and will not have the presence of mind to fully grasp them, and only three other live people in the whole universe will ever get close, because I say so

Are we allowed to hear the rant on A Tale of Magic? I hate it as well and wanna hear more opinions on it

FELLOW ATOM HATER HELLO FRIEND

You can indeed hear the rant! Word of warning: i was up till midnight last night and am a bit scattered, and i have not read the book in awhile, so this may be slightly incomprehensible. I'll be pulling some stuff from my actual review, too.

Disclaimer: it's fine if you like it, good for you, now please go away. this will only upset you and i don't want to upset people.

So, let's get this out of the way first: Colfer abuses italics. Like, i love italics, and i still wanted to rip my eyes out by the third chapter. Instead of using emotional description and tags, he emphazies every other word, even when characters are having normal conversations. He also uses italics to represent it when people are yelling, and people yell quite a lot in his book.

Ok, i'll stop with the italicizing now, but that's what the book is like, right???

next: the magic system is shit! total shit! there is not a single part of it that makes sense! it is never once explained in any way, shape, or form other than "fairies have magic, humans dont, witches are evil fairies". I am fairly lenient with magic systems; they don't have to make total sense or make sense right away, but i think it's fair of me to... yknow... want even a little bit of context. A Tale of Magic is the seventh book in the LOS universe, and i still dont know what the fuck is going on with the magic.

Example of well-done vague magic: The Raven Cycle.

Example of well-done explained magic: Six of Crows.

Example of a shitshow of magic that makes no fucking sense in any singular way: A Tale of Magic!

next next: i hate the main character so fucking much, why couldn't Lucy have narrated, Bristol Board is--i dont use this term often but she is--a total mary sue chosen one Not Like Other Girls protagonist, i hate her, that is all i feel the need to say over this aspect

NEXT next next, i am quite upset with Bristol Board's "magiclexia" thing. For starters... "Colfer learn what words mean" challenge. Clearly it was supposed to be based on dyslexia, but the dys is "not" (e.g. disability, dysfunction) and the lexia is relating to words and reading. magiclexia is "magic reading", basically. He should have done literally anything else. fuck, "dysmagica" would have been better than this (though that makes my eyes bleed a little).

NEXT NEXT NEXT NEXT, this is the most exhaustingly heavy-handed metaphor for homophobia ever. I'm gay and i got sick of it within a few chapters. It's all "magic's not a choice, hate is! people are born with magic! magic isn't moral or immoral!" and the anti-magic people are like "magic is against god! magic is a choice! you can be a fairy, but only if you never use your magic!" it's exhausting and not subtle in the slightest. (Plus, there's no gay people in this homophobia metaphor??? thats. hm. not great). Also, his metaphor for gay people... are fairies... you see why having your gay metaphor be called fairies is bad, right...?

next next next next NEXT, Colfer has never in his life been taught "show, don't tell". Every single fucking event and emotion is expressly told, you never once have to use your own brain because he'll go like "she cast her eyes to the floor, blushing, and mumbled, 'sorry'", and then immediately add "she was embarrassed" NO SHIT SHERLOCK!

finally (not really but if i keep going i'll probably drive everyone insane with the length of this post) i don't know whomst the fuck this book is for, and that is a problem. It's content and character ages suggest it's YA, but the reading level, character simplicity, and humour is more suited for MG. It's not the weird space between YA/MG, either; i've seen books do that, and this is not the same place. Colfer's LOS series is middle grade, which moves into YA-MG for the last book, and this isn't even that; it's very obviously trying to be YA, but it has way too many immature, childish moments in places that don't seem to be on purpose.

Anyway, i told you i hate this book! this is just the one book! i didn't even mention the 6 LOS books or this book's sequel! do you understand the amount of wrath i have toward this book? because it's a lot!

ty for the ask and have a great day!

you were talking about something a bit similar yesterday so I'm sorry for being late to the conversation, but I just do not understand people who are fans of the LOV and yet are so vehemently hateful towards Midoriya, and in turn most of the other kids. I understand the criticism that sometimes the kids get things handed to them by the story, but tbh that is just to be expected of the protagonist characters in a shonen manga like this one. even so however, it's not like Midoriya gets off free of everything that he does? his actions and his sacrifices and very actually very rarely ever truly appreciated within the story, just because he is successful in most of his feats doesn't mean that the people around him necessarily Notice (him only getting one internship request after the sports festival despite displaying amazing power and critical thinking skills, the Stain Hosu incident, even in the VERY BEGINNING of the series when he runs forward to save Bakugou he says himself that he was only reprimanded for being so careless in his actions).

I see so many people who are (so ironically) only seeing the story in black and white, when in reality these kids, and Midoriya especially, are being negatively impacted by hero society just as much as the villains are, they're just experiencing it from a different angle. (Which adds a whole other layer to the Midoriya becoming the greatest hero plotline, because the society that he is also fighting against is the one that was shaped that way by his predecessor- albeit unintentionally.) Midoriya is going to be the one to try to save Shigaraki, Midoriya has already become the greatest hero by actively looking past the actions of Shig and the League and wanting to help them.

- I didn't get to finish my thought from the FULL ESSAY I sent earlier (my bad about how long that ended up being lmao) but...yeah I was saying about how Midoriya is already a better hero at 16 than most other pros because he actively wants to help the League. Midoriya is exactly the kind of hero that the villains, and Shigaraki in particular, needs in order to have the happy ending that so many want for him. I agree that the manga has been a bit of a drag-along for the past few...months tbh, and I am absolutely Livid at the way that Bones has structured the story, and it's causing a lot of boredom and Tons of tension with people, but I feel like a lot of villain fans are taking that out on the integrity of the characters themselves, which is causing a lot of the mischaracterizaton of Midoriya in particular. n idk, I just find it sort of ironic, DEFINITELY annoying, and in general just.... :/ yknow. just :/

I think it's completely valid for people to just simply not like certain characters for whatever reason they might have, im not here to police people's opinions, but when people's opinions come at the expense of misunderstanding pretty key elements of the characters / story they're talking about, that's when I have a problem. FINAL MESSAGE I promise lmao sorry again for the 600 page essay

You're good lol. In fact, I've discussed some of this in-depth in private with a tumblr friend. Again, I feel like my DMs are being read 👀 anyway lol

So obviously this is going to be a long ass post so I'll add a cut toward the top. But I wanna start off with: there's a lot to unpack here and I'm going to preface with, I agree with you. But I also have to say that I see both sides, but when it comes to vehemently hating a character and letting that hate for that character lead to bad takes (which I see for Deku and another character that I'll get to under the cut) I feel like the overall point people are trying to make loses its grip because it starts to just turn into bashing, and doesn't actually hold water with what's actually in the story.

"I just do not understand people who are fans of the LOV and yet are so vehemently hateful towards Midoriya, and in turn most of the other kids. I understand the criticism that sometimes the kids get things handed to them by the story, but tbh that is just to be expected of the protagonist characters in a shonen manga like this one."

I'll be honest, I see a lot of people love on the UA kids. Especially ones like Kirishima, Kaminari, Mina, Tsuyu, basically any of the ones with personalities that are beyond "I have to get stronger! I have to catch up with my classmates and live up to everyone's expectations!" Which I personally feel like pretty much all of the UA kids have as personalities, save for the main five, and the few above that I listed. But for the hatred toward Midoriya....oy. Where do I begin.

Well, I actually don't see a lot of Deku hate on my dash. I follow a very small number of blogs, most of which are pretty in line with my POV of the story and therefore, I don't see a lot of bad takes.

A little baby rant inside of this monster post:

Yes, I have come across extremist villain-stan blogs that, while I agree with some of their opinions on the villains, I don't agree with their opinions on the hero characters. I've unfollowed blogs like that, because they started exhausting me and making me upset, tbqh. Like yes, the villains are the best characters in the story. But guess what? They aren't the only ones in the story. We have other characters that are important to the overall themes and messages. I, personally, really like the hero kid:villain set up. Others I've seen want the heroes and villains completely separated in the story and for the villains to save themselves without any help from the heroes?? Makes zero sense because the story is about these becoming true heroes, and in order to do that they need to challenge themselves by saving a villain. So...blogs that were spouting that nonsense, I've unfollowed and stopped engaging with.

But back to Midoriya. Okay, I genuinely, genuinely like Midoriya! I've liked him from the beginning. He's not favorite, he's not even my second favorite. He's in my top 5 though. But the only dislike I personally see toward Midoriya on my blog is for these problematic things that have occurred:

Telling Shouto he thinks he's going to forgive his father because he's kind, making Natsuo feel bad for not forgiving his abusive POS father.

Trying to "reach" Dabi the same way he reached Shouto, only to just cause more harm.

Saying Endeavor is a mentor who made him stronger??? TO Dabi??

Teaming up with the fucking top 3

So....basically...any time Midoriya has been interjected into the Todoroki plot line, he's been less than likable--AFTER what he did for Shouto during the sports festival. That was a positive thing, and it actually kicked off the Todoroki plot line really really well. It got us into Shouto's inner world and started his story off nicely I think.

And you can argue that Midoriya's flaw is being blinded by hero society and seeing the good in everybody, BUT--

This was LITERALLY THE FIRST INTERACTION between Midoriya and Endeavor. THIS set the tone for the Todoroki plot. So....all that stuff up there that people hate about Midoriya, is definitely valid. I mean...I don't think it's worth hating him for but people can like and dislike who they want. But this just reiterates my belief that so many things in BNHA come to a fucking halt for Endeavor's bitch ass. The main character included.

"it's not like Midoriya gets off free of everything that he does? his actions and his sacrifices and very actually very rarely ever truly appreciated within the story, just because he is successful in most of his feats doesn't mean that the people around him necessarily Notice (him only getting one internship request after the sports festival despite displaying amazing power and critical thinking skills, the Stain Hosu incident, even in the VERY BEGINNING of the series when he runs forward to save Bakugou he says himself that he was only reprimanded for being so careless in his actions)"

So, I don't entirely disagree but I do have to disagree to an extent. Midoriya's consequences have been a topic for a while now and everyone says the same thing. Nothing ever comes back to him, he doesn't ever actually fail at anything. His failures don't actually hold him back or push him to challenge his beliefs. Like...narrative consequences here is what I'm talking about. Midoriya only got one offer after the sports festival, yes that's a consequence of putting your body through ridiculous strain and self-destructing in front of everyone like that. But it ended up working in his favor because he went with Gran Torino who taught him his next big move, full cowling, which I think we can all agree was a major power-up for him. So...it wasn't much of a consequence in the long run. It wasn't a set back. And you're right, he was reprimanded for rushing in to save Bakugo in the beginning, which is coming into play now when we see that it's actually hard for people to step in and save others because everyone is so trained by society to just let heroes handle everything. Even though Bakugo would have died if not for Midoriya. BUT--what happened next? All Might gave him his power. That was a reward by the narrative. Granted that HAD to happen for our story to kick off, but I'm just trying to show how Midoriya doesn't ever actually have any set-backs.

"Midoriya is going to be the one to try to save Shigaraki, Midoriya has already become the greatest hero by actively looking past the actions of Shig and the League and wanting to help them."

"but...yeah I was saying about how Midoriya is already a better hero at 16 than most other pros because he actively wants to help the League. Midoriya is exactly the kind of hero that the villains, and Shigaraki in particular, needs in order to have the happy ending that so many want for him"

Fully agree here. I'll say that recently I've seen a lot of people making posts about how they don't think it'll be Midoriya doing the reaching and saving. How they think it'll be the LOV saving each other without the help of the heroes, how they'll reach each other's hearts?? Which...I don't even know what to say besides ask people who think that what they think the purpose of all these parallels and similarities drawn between him and Shigaraki are for, if not to bring them together in the end (and stay connected too--not just be yeeted from each other's lives), the two brothers who were separated from each other, and a teenage girl who was never accepted by her peers and basically forced to find family in a group of adult men lol. I'm not sure if you were responding to my rant yesterday with this ask lol, but if you are, I mean yeah I'm on board here. Midoriya is supposed to be that "true hero" that breaks through even the toughest, strongest walls, who in HIS case is Shigaraki. But not just him, Shouto, Ochacko, and Bakugo too. There's a kid:villain set up for a reason, so people who don't want that set up are either just....super super one-sided in how they're reading it, or it's just their preference and they're not actually caring about what the story itself is going to do. (Bakugo is kind of a seventh wheel....lol)

Again, I can't say I've seen too much irrational Deku hate on my dash. I avoid stupid shit for the most part. Most of the blogs I follow, while they may not like Midoriya, they still see the redeeming characteristics in him and still make valid takes on the story and take his actual character into account. But I have seen the irrational hate you're talking about, I've just successfully yeeted it from my dash.

Another character, and I know you didn't bring this character up but I feel this issue applies to them as well--is Hawks. Now...I do not like Hawks. I don't hate him, but I seriously just cannot bring myself to like him. I can't tell if it's his fans that have just ruined him for me, or just his overall vibe in the story. I don't even know at this point I've spent so long avoiding getting to know his character. But--I've seen villain-stan blogs hate him so much to a point where they completely forget that he is also a victim of society and has his own issues. And their takes on him come at the expense of....well, a clear understanding of the story. Now right now Hawks is being handled not-so-great, but even before this. Of course nobody has to like him, I mean I just said that I don't, but this irrational hate that comes at the expense of his actual character is annoying to me.

"I think it's completely valid for people to just simply not like certain characters for whatever reason they might have, im not here to police people's opinions, but when people's opinions come at the expense of misunderstanding pretty key elements of the characters / story they're talking about, that's when I have a problem"

Yep yep yep. I agree here too. So in a nutshell, no matter what character it is, if people irrationally hate them to a point where their takes on the story just stop making sense, yes I agree that it starts to wear away at the integrity of the character, and it also annoys me and I end up just unfollowing and I no longer take anything they say seriously. And there are a couple of blogs I follow that really don't like Midoriya at all, but they don't waste their time talking about how much they don't like him. They simply just...don't talk about him. That's what people should do because otherwise it fills EVERYONE'S dash with negativity that we didn't ask for. That's why I'm glad I've stopped getting so many asks about Hawks because I have never really had anything nice to say about him and after so many people sending me stuff asking to talk about him I started to feel like a shitty person for filling peoples' dashes up with that. I mean...I'm seriously mean to Hawks lol. I am. So yeah.

I don't particularly understand the extreme hatred either. I totally get not liking a character but that extreme hatred you're talking about I've made a successful effort to distance myself from. Thankfully.

Hello!! It's the anon from a while ago (about failing diss/half a page CV), I'm sorry it's taken me a while but I was trying to get hold of my thoughts there for a while. I was wondering if you could tell me a slight bit about how to research/find stuff that would let me to stay in touch with academia.

I know you said that my prof said that BC they think I would be happier in a different subject but I just. I know I won't. I have seen myself work with this subject and I'm so focused, so driven and I would trade the world for this. (But I didn't do my undergrad in the same subject as I did my master's in and we never had to write essays so when it came to that, everything kept falling apart and I kept trying to reach out to my profs about how I don't think I know how to write or read critically or if I am doing something wrong BC I sure feel like it and they kept ignoring it and my supervisor went kept saying, it's a great topic you've written good stuff and I was convinced that I hadn't because the comments suggested otherwise and I. I am trying very hard BC I want to do this and I know it's not going to be easy BC it's a whole different world but no one would help me and i know as a master's student, no one spoon feeds you but I just wanted to know how to do things right yknow? I have seen people do it and it's vvv different than what mine feels like, mine always feels a whole lot...trivial? And I wanted to know how to add/find depth and no one would tell me. I know where I lack and I know what to improve on and what I am good at, I just want someone to guide me a little but all my professors are either unwilling or think I don't lack what I think I do and it just...feels very unfair)

I'm sorry you had to read thru all of that but I was rly hoping for some advice on research, if you want to. (No pressure, ofcourse). Also, it's a long shot but as usual my professors aren't replying so I was wondering if you could tell me if it's possible to do a PhD from a good institution after getting um like 50% in your master's. Because in a couple of years when I'm better, I want to do that.

Thank you so much!! For listening and being here!!

(also I could come off anon for the research advice if that's going to be better!!)

Dear Anon,

I confess that I find this a self-contradictory message of yours. But I will do my best to respond helpfully.

Firstly, I do not understand how you can say that you would "trade the world" to work in your chosen subject, and also say that you do not know how to do research in it. Clearly you have done research in it. I presume that you have also talked to research librarians for help, and perhaps pursued independent reading based on the bibliographies of the monographs on which you've built your own thesis. If not, those are fairly obvious places to start.

Secondly, you say that your professors are "unwilling" to guide you. It sounds to me as though they are guiding you, but you don't want to listen, because you think they are either mistaken or lying to you. Your graduate supervisor has said that the scope of your topic and your handling of it are both good. This is high praise. That you are "convinced otherwise" because you got detailed feedback on your argument is irrelevant to the actual quality of your work.

You say that "no one would help you" but you also seem to describe a scenario in which you send emails saying you are anxious about your own reading and writing skills. Any graduate seminar is designed to help you practice and hone skills in graduate-level reading, analysis, and writing. My impression is that your M.A. was a taught degree, with coursework. So your professors are thus trying to help you improve those skills through their guidance in discussion and their often-detailed feedback on essays.

You say that you know that graduate work is different from undergraduate work, but you don't seem to have internalized this. There is no single way to "do things right" which you need to unlock via complicated quests or a correctly-worded email. (This is, by the way, equally true for undergraduate work.) You bewail that no one would tell you how to add/find depth... but also say that your supervisor told you that your argument and its scope were good. I'm not sure why you remain so convinced of the contrary. I'm not sure what kind of suggestions you were looking for but felt cheated of, and I'm not sure how to advise you on that particular question, because I can easily imagine circumstances in which professors would decline to offer you specific suggestions because the very practice of finding resources and assessing their value and relevance is also a graduate-level skill you need to practice! I do understand your frustration, and I think there are also lots of times when offering graduate students "starter kits" and specific research suggestions can be helpful and constructive. But there are other times when you've been put on your own for valid pedagogical reasons.

You say that you "know where [you] lack," what you are good at, and what to improve on. Your professors may, in fact, have a better idea of this than you do. I say this because this is kind of their job. Certainly my professors knew better than I did when I was an M.A. student. Because they were good and dedicated pedagogues, they told me this in no uncertain terms, of praise, censure, and suggestions for improvement and additional possibilities. All of the above can be constructive feedback. I know that that can feel shocking if you had an undergraduate experience of earning high marks and fulsome praise fairly consistently. One of the luxuries of graduate school is getting more, and more detailed, feedback on your work. And as one of my most beloved professors terrified a roomful of M.A. students by saying on our first day: we were all the smartest kids in the room in undergrad, and now we were all sitting at the same table.

I still have no idea what your subject is, so beyond the general suggestions I offered above, I can't offer you advice on research. But I will advise you to take your supervisor's expertise and encouragement of your work seriously. I say this based on my own experience of finding that some of my M.A. students (like nearly all of my undergraduates) still have wildly exaggerated/inaccurate ideas of what it is possible or constructive to undertake in a semester- or year-long project. Keeping your focus and scope comparatively tight is very often a good thing.

Is it possible to go on to a Ph.D. after a rocky M.A. experience and transcript? Sure. By all means, read widely and advocate for yourself. You might consider asking currently-enrolled Ph.D. students in your desired programs for advice. Also: take seriously the advice of experts. And in the meantime, I reiterate my advice on enjoying a year or so cultivating life and relationships outside academe.

Yrs,

Spinster Aunt of Tumblr

You put in the tags of one of your posts about how Catra’s redemption was rushed, that she was horrible to the Best Friend Squad and she abused them, and that her relationship with Adora was also a little toxic but Zuko also hurt the Gaang yet people love him and praise him just because he’s a guy

i wasn’t sure if i was gonna answer this but here i am. i’m not sure what post i said this in, but i do remember doing it so,,

first off, i like catra and i like zuko. they’re both interesting characters with troubled pasts and i like both of them as characters. i do see what you mean by how people praise zuko for the littlest things when he’s done tons of wrong things, and they love him for the exact reason that they hate many female characters, but zuko’s redemption was handled a lot better than catra’s.

we see signs of zuko’s redemption early on in the season, and we see him go through a lot in the three seasons – especially the second season where he starts to realize how the fire nation is wrong. catra doesn’t have that build up even tho the show is longer. we see her backstory, we see what she’s been through, and she has been through a lot but that doesn’t excuse the things she did. zuko’s trauma also doesn’t excuse the things he did – like attack all those villages and chase aang, katara, and sokka halfway around the world. he did have a reason for doing it tho and while that reason can be interpreted as selfish it was at least better than catra’s in which she was, what? trying to prove to adora that she was better? her main reason was revenge against adora and approval from shadow weaver and hordak (the latter which disappeared once shadow weaver left and stuff) because she was … i don’t wanna say obsessed because i think at one point the two of them loved each other but catra just wouldn’t let go of adora.

catra doesn’t go through stages where she realizes that the horde is wrong, i’m pretty sure she said in the first season that she knew all along but i don’t really remember. whereas zuko has to unlearn what the fire nation taught him about how they were better than everyone else, that’s one of the main points of his confrontation against ozai. zuko apologizes to the gaang about the things he’s done in the past, and he has to earn their trust by helping them. we see how toph had no qualms about him joining because he never hurt her directly, we see aang understanding him and choosing to forgive him but not forget, we see sokka to trust him after he goes on a suicide mission to help him, we see katara start to trust him after he helps her find his mother’s killer. zuko gains their trust by actively doing things to help, and catra just,,,sits down and eats one of those things glimmer made and then has a cute sneeze and says flimsily that she’ll try to control her anger for them to trust her? if my memory serves me right, she didn’t even apologize. i love the idea of catra joining the princess alliance and even the idea of catradora but i wish there was more development to it. i wanted to see scorpia mad at her and not forgiving her because she was a horrible friend, i wanted to see glimmer and bow a little cautious around her, and most of all i wanted to see adora very slowly forgive catra and trust her because shit y’all catra really hurt her and her friends.

i think that if they wanted catra and adora together it should have been done better. for five seasons (three years in the show’s timeline), catra physically and even emotionally abused adora (and her friends by proxy), and it was all just sort of forgotten. after everything that double trouble said to catra she just went back to her sort of obsession over adora. to really redeem catra i would have wanted her to, like, give up on adora, yknow? it would have been nice if she realized that adora made her choice and let go. catra really just needed to let go, and then she could have joined the princess alliance.

zuko’s arc is about aang, and his father, and his uncle, and about zuko. with a shorter show his redemption is much more fleshed out. it isn’t because he’s a guy that his redemption is better, it’s because he actually had time to redeem himself and learn what the fire nation did to the world.

i really love both these characters, and they both have many many flaws which is what i think a lot of people forget

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Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I was tagged by:

Sarah / @timothyolyphant. Sarah Sarah Sarah, where do I even begin. Started from the bottom now we here but it’s actually started from an ask I sent on anon about getting sunburnt in Bali, and now we here. Life always manages to remind me that through adversity you forge valuable bonds and you are one of those. Your gifs are amazing and your personality is even more stunning. I love talking to you and I love seeing much you love fostering people’s creativity. It has truly made me look at gifmaking in a different light and injected to much fun and positivity into this. So thank you, friend <3

Nums / @cillianmurphy. Nums, my love, fellow Bulb. What could I possibly have done so well in the past to deserve your presence in my life! Always teaching me new slang by osmosis and always a balm to my weathered heart, you lift even the darkest days with your kindness, consideration, and love for Paddington 2 best movie ever made. Plus your gifmaking brain is full chefs kiss. Thank you for teaching me so many things. One day when the world stops being so crazy I WILL visit you and hug you and that is a threat <3

Kumi / @hollywoods. Kumi, my cat icon kin. Simply said, I think your gifmaking skills are out of this world and your graphics live rent free in my mind. Your humour never fails to make me laugh and I need you to know that I STILL think about the time you described yourself as wearing a jester outfit jangling across the court for a laff. You’re a bright spot in my life and I’m grateful I’ve gotten to know you this year. Please never stop being so amazing <3

Cece / @nickyoung. Cece my darling. Thank you SO much for joining my lovecraft sideblog, I literally could not have done it without you. We don’t talk a lot but that doesn’t mean I don’t value you so much. Your creativity is incredible and your sets are SO fucking gorgeous and honestly goals. Seeing you flourish fills me with so much pride and joy and I’m so happy we got to know each other this year <3

Okay emo stuff out of the way, time for my favourite edits! There were a lot and im indecisive so here goes:

max max: fury road set - I like to call this set “kate learns how to make a colour set.” I learned how to make gifs and mmfr is one of my all-time favourite movies so it was only right that I made a set. I always thought this movie was only orange and blues, but making this gifset made me fall in love with the movie even more

birds of prey / dinah lance set - Dinah Lance love of my life. If you’ve followed me this year, you will know that I went into birds of prey a person and left birds of prey a dinah lance stan. I previously made a birds of prey colour set, but I wanted to do one JUST for dinah. I’ve seen one too many people say that it’s hard to do colour sets of poc so I had to see for myself and I’m SO proud of how colourful this set is. plus, yknow, I love her. 

pacific rim / stacker pentecost set - pacrim is one of my FAVOURITE movies and this character has so many iconic lines. This lowkey turned into a colour set which isn’t hard for a movie like pacrim. 

record stores in films set - I woke up one sunday morning and my brain was YELLING at me to make this set. I downloaded 25 movies that all have iconic record store scenes and watched every single one and ended up with ten perfect gifs. I cut so many movies bc they didn’t work as well and I’m so sad abt that but I had SO much fun watching the movies and ended up falling in love and finding a new fave in the compilation so it was really a Project and I had Fun. 

the old guard set - this line makes me SO feral and I just HAD to gif it. It’s one my favourites because it’s my new lesson for life.

BONUS: my Lovecraft Country sets. This show taught me SO much and despite it’s awful ending, I’m still grateful for the first 7 episodes and I did end up making 65 sets for it over 10 weeks so I feel it deserves a special place in my 2020 recap

women in history - learning about history through a show, is there anything better? This set in particular was SO easy to make and took me literally 20 minutes, but that’s because it’s built on a solid foundation of knowledge. I knew the moment I saw a character which person in history she was and I think that’s a kudos to the show and to how well they taught me stuff. Also these other historical sets. 

leti lewis outfits - took me FOR EVER. still fun tho.

episode 2 colours - speaks for itself but this show is so STUPID to colour and you can never use a psd bc every scene is lit differently but making a colour set was so much fun because of the challenge

this name etymology set - this took me four days and SO much time but im so proud of it because I tried new techniques and learned so much

Tagging some friends because I love seeing y’alls creations but I want to know what YOUR favourites are!

@vicspedretti @daisylouisejohnson @dani-clayton @hannahsgrose @jodiewhittakerr @hannahjohn-kamen @robintunney @chris-evans @alex-krycek @clintfbarton @bosemanchadwick @chloebeale @hailesteinfeld @timeslord @melsmonroe @annelisters @owenjoyner 

oh my god... OH MY GOD. DO I HAVE THE STORY FOR YOU it’s the dream i just had... i just woke up from.... i needa write it all down before i forget. this is some messed up stuff. tw for blood, violence, fire, mentions of illness, mentions of... ion know. psychosis?, really graphic scenes, ed sheeran, some kinda existential- but highkey funny- shit at the end

ion think imma be able to go back to sleep lmao

so it starts off and i’m with a friend a knew back when i went to school. we’ll call her j. this part is kind of fuzzy for me, but we’re walking together on this long, winding sidewalk, and she’s chattering away about some party or something that we’re headed to. at some point, we meet up with some other people and we’re all walking together now, talking all close-knit and whatevs. at some point, j has me pulled to her side, and i think her tone’s gotten all sort of flirty as she talks me up to these people i vaguely know. then she pulls me close and presses this big, long kiss on my cheek, that has me confused and maybe kinda uncomfortable lol. sorry to shoot you down, hon, but i kind of had to push her away from me. then we both got kind of uncomfortable, and she even mentioned something about how i flat-out rejected her, i apologize, and then we both kind of laugh it off.

then suddenly, it’s like i’m being cut from one scene to another. it’s nighttime now. suddenly, i’m climbing out of a car to find we’re in, like... some sort of grassy field, right outside what looked like a fenced-off baseball field. there are people scattered about, laying on blankets and talking and stuff. i climb up on a sort of like... hill. but it’s barely defined enough to be considered a hill. but i get on there and i see j with our group and a couple other kids i knew from her time. and i’m like, “c- can. can i. may i. can i join y’alls group if you’ll let me” all nervous and stuff for some reason and then they say yes and i go to lay down near them but then we do another one of those movie scene cut things

next thing i see, i’m in one of two cars, parked in my driveway at home. i’m alone in one car while my family is all together in the other. then the passenger door in my car gets pulled open and my mom poked her head in, shining a flashlight around. i look over to note my father’s doing the same in the other car- and at this point, i guess i figure that i ended up falling asleep at the outing and my people had to come pick me up or something. but then i also get this magical feeling, and i just know that somebody ended up stealing my parents’ credit card or smth.

i don’t really know what happens between then and this next thing, but next thing i know, my father and i are walking together, crossing the street, approaching the first house we see with an open garage and lights on. we kind of step inside the garage and suddenly this rc car turns on and starts driving toward the gutter. and i’m like ‘ope, better grab that, then i can give it to the kid who’s no doubt on the other end” just as i grab the car, i turn around to find that the kid had in fact come out! he looked about my age, and he had short red hair, and his eyes were blown wide and his expression one of... shock maybe? or perhaps terror with what i learn next lol. he’s completely silent as i try to hand the car to him, explaining that “hey we’re a neighbor from down the street, we’re looking for some other neighbor(i guess at one point j was established as a neighbor i don’t know the exact address of?) called j, who may have stolen something from us idk.”

the kid kind of rushes inside without saying anything, and then out comes this ed sheeran looking fellow. he’s so short at first i swear i didn’t even realize he was different from the kid LMAO- anyway tho. he’s holding a beer and i give him the car, and then i’m sort of pacing around as i explain to him what’s up ‘cause that’s what i do. he’s kind of got this blank pleasant smile on his face, all the while, but i don’t really pay mind to it yknow? in a bit, i’m in the driveway, again near the gutter. my father’s on the far end of the driveway, maybe around the middle, standing near where the lawn begins. ed sheeran is standing right outside of the garage. i’ve just explained that we’re neighbors looking for a particular neighbor, and now it’s my father’s turn to offer his two cents. then i look up and suddenly i can clearly tell that ed sheeran’s been STABBED. his white shirt clings to his body, stained all sorts of red and brown. there’s almost a clear point of puncture right through his body. i’ve never had a dream in which i could smell but i’m sure if i could i’d practically smell the rot.

i look at him kind of wary, and then my father finishes whatever he says, and quietly i go, “..sir? you okay?” and i don’t really remember his answer, but i’m 80% sure it’s some stupidly simple, good ol’ pleasant thing. but then he’s running at me and he suddenly has a KNIFE. A KNIFE???? oh but, father to the rescue! he comes barreling over to protect me then suddenly the two are on the ground, in the street, fighting it out. kind of like an action movie, except it’s probably like the middle of the night and they’re a bit a ways from the light of the garage so i can only vaguely see them. now, i’m screaming. i’m yelling, “HELP” and “FIRE”(am i a psychic?) and lights are turning on in houses and i can already somehow hear people muttering in their phones for 911. but i’m desperate, just kind of standing there, watching the scene roll out “CALL POLICE” “CALL AN AMBULANCE” “CALL 911“ “HELP” like woah call the whole embassy why don’t you-

then suddenly, i’ve got this feeling. and let me tell you, it is not a good one. and now, randomly, a whole bunch of lights in the neighborhood turn blindingly bright and then explode. it goes from house to house, just exploding all the lights, as i think you’d see in a movie oh, but we’re not over yet. i get another terrible terrible feeling, and then i look toward the house we’re standing in front of. i don’t see it, at first, but i just know that there’s a fire in that house. and then, what do you know, a fire truck comes barreling our way. at this point i guess the altercation’s ended, because i’m pretty sure that’s my father’s silhouette in front of me, i think gearing to catch that kid up there- oh, what kid? yknow. i guess while i wasn’t paying attention when the fire started growing, but now it’s visible through the window. and now a kid has climbed onto the roof in front of that window, like we’re taught to in school. i guess my father’s rearing to catch him, but then the kid jumps and my father just sidesteps away, letting him plummet onto the concrete and ultimately his death. jfc dude

i don’t really know what happens between then and now, but next thing i know myself and my father are running down the road, back toward our house. i think i’m crying. but then he scoops me into his arms and comfortingly whispers, “don’t worry. it’s just an au. it’s just an au. that means it isn’t canon”

and then i woke up and bolted upright, and felt this short, strong sense of peace before deciding that “OH MY GOD THAT WAS A POWERFUL DREAM I NEEDA WRITE ABOUT IT IDUHFDJ” and like,, christ man. sometimes i have nightmares where they try to scare me, and it doesn’t really work... but it’s been a long time since i had a nightmare that really shook me like that. like fuck. i’m kind scared to go back to sleep lmao

What do your Gilmore Girls oc’s - as in, the ones related to the Gilmore’s, (Hope, Kit, etc), think of Jason and Lorelei’s relationship to him?

Um okay  lesse. 

Starting off with Amelia  she’s not super keen on him. Unlike Max he doesn’t bother trying to get to know Lorelai’s kids and that rubs her the wrong way. She’s also already dealing with Luke impulse-marrying/haphazardly dating Nicole ( iirc? I gotta look up the timeline but I believe so) and is kinda “can you two just be single for one entire year??” She doesn’t know much about him but her impression of him is that he’s cut from the same Hartford cloth as her grandparents and she very much wonders what her mom sees in him ( and asks Rory as much when they’re hanging out just the two of them) Also the insistence of “date me. Please date me.” prior to his relationship with Lorelai absolutely spooks her  and she’s constantly squinting like “do I Need to use the right hook dad taught me or nah?” and she might get some guys from the SHH football team to kick him out of the Firefly  when he pulls the whole “im not leaving until you agree to get back with me” because being the Gilmore Danes Baby comes with perks.

El likewise is sorta...put off by how insistent he is? He also isn’t sure it’s a good idea to date him since he knows it was Emily and Richard’s horrible behavior that sent her to call him. ( “and like I don’t Do dating/romance but dating someone because your parents  abuse you seems....like...like....not a good plan?” not that he says this to his mother of course but he does say it to Brad. It should also be noted that out of all my  Rory sibling ocs Elliot is one of the fastest to Actively call Emily and Richard abusive in re to their behavior to Lorelai. So he understands a bit of how that interplays with Lorelai’s behavior and dating Jason but all the same...he’s not thrilled. ) Elliot also actually liked Max and was pretty upset by how that all ended so he’s not open to his mom dating another guy that might or might not keep around. And again, Jason canonically doesn’t really  make an effort to get to know Rory so El doesn’t know him from a hole on the ground and sorta mistrusts him tbh. Everything from the fact that he works for Richard to the whole “your mother hates me so you should date me” ( which El’s just...he kinda sees it as Jason using Emily and Lorelai’s history in his favor and he’s...not a fan.) just puts him on edge tbh and he’s sad for his mom when it doesn’t work out but also lowkey relieved.

Hope is super protective of Lorelai like to the nth degree ( understandably so tbh)  and understands on a personal level how parental abuse can leave you wanting to date people who really aren’t worth your time and energy and the why of it all. That being said both in spite of that and because of  that she’s so  so not here for his insistence and has considered pulling Lorelai aside and being “I love you but from one Gilmore Girl to another, anyone who you date after one of mom’s flagellations should be considered the same as someone you chose to date while drunk.” ( but  is also afraid that will push Lorelai away from her and she...Lorelai and Rory  are the only family that haven’t hurt her so it’s messy yknow)  She very much gives him a shovel talk and lowkey thinks his only redeeming quality is he wanted to tell Emily and Richard about them ( she understands more than anything not wanting to tell their parents...anything tbh because like Lorelai says “ When something good happens to me, I'm just afraid you're gonna make me feel bad about it nd when something bad happens to me, I’m always afraid you’ll say “I told you so.“  but she’s also “Lore...you can’t just keep hiding this from them it’ll come out and badly”) She’s overall pretty unimpressed by him and is very concerned by the fact that Lorelai  chose  to date him. She pretty much warms him upfront that if he’s trying to mess with Lorelai or take advantage of the fact that Emily  messes with Lore’s head they’ll never f-ing find his body. 

Sofia likewise is incredibly  protective of Lorelai and like on instinct distrusts anyone that her parents ( Richard and Emily) like so she’s pretty much “nope don’t trust him” from the get go. She’s mostly just glad Emily has someone to be a b-tch to that isn’t her and/or Lorelai (”she’s giving him the tripple freeze, makes it a lot warmer where we’re sitting”) She thinks the fact that he thinks Richard and Emily won’t ruin his relationship with Lorelai is sorta naive?(  like “of course they will. We’re seasoned Gilmore Daughters. We know this”)  But  also that pursuing it is sorta dumb. She’s pretty  cold towards him when they start dating but is also incredibly incredibly disgusted by his parents tbh and jesus she just hates that entire family and the fact that her father will associate with them. About the only good thing that comes from that arch from her is she gets a bit of a softer view of her mother since she actually knows the separation happened because of Emily asking Richard not to sue Jason after Lorelai begged him not to.

But also she ( this very soft spoken and quiet little girl who  in s1 would cry if someone glared at her) basically  tells him to get out of her sister’s inn before she grabs a gardening shovel from the tool shed when he pulls the thing at the inn.

Kit is probably  the one who has the least unfavorable opinion about him? Like he doesn’t really  know him that well and because of how badly Richard treats him ( and Emily sometimes) he’s really not that bothered by his mom dating someone in the merits of “it’ll piss the Harford Gilmores off” like tbh he sorta gets it. He does  get “lmao nope” when he pursues Lorelai  at the  inn  and is actually  the one to tell Luke Jason and Lore aren’t together and might be the one to make the call that his condo was on fire and considers getting a baseball bat tbh. But until then he’s pretty indifferent towards him. 

But also he’s absolutely disgusted with how Richard treated him like “that was his partner?? And he sold him down the river?? For people that screwed him ( Richard) over?? He tanked this guys business to keep all the money with that other rich asshole??” ( keeping in mind Kit is the one with the worst relationship with Richard and the one who gets treated the worst by Richard. And also that growing up with mostly blue collared people rich assholes ( tm) screwing over a new business is really something about the Hartford Elite/upper circles that he really abhors.) So mostly he’s just focused on how horrible everyone involved  in that lawsuit is and is like “anyways  im so glad im not involved with y’all because I’m The Dumb Gilmore and didn’t need a college fund” and pretty much just rants/talks to Tristan about it like “anyways babe you won’t believe what The Jackwagon Allegiance did this time-”

So like tbh none of them like Jason much and they absolutely  are “yeah but how bout no tho” when he gets uber pushy and their opinion absolutely plumets when the stuff goes down in Raincoats And Recipes.

But a lot of them ( Kit and  Hope in particular) also incredibly disgusted with how Richard treated him and how the  whole thing was handled ( Floyd calling PIs on his son? Asshole Move. Floyd suing Richard over petty  shit? Asshole Move. Basically everything that followed? Asshole Moves.) and all of them are also pretty critical of  how Richard told Lorelai she only cared about her boyfriend when she in fact broke up with Jason over him not droping the lawsuit ( Elliot who in Tristan’s words is “a bit of a paragon( affectionate)” might actually tell him about it and remind him that maybe he should say sorry in his very soft but not unsure Elliot way which might mean that Richard apologizes to Lorelai  bc honestly i need it) so they also don’t give him much thought past “why did Lorelai date him again?” and don't pay him much mind until the events of the s4 finale.

Honorary mention: Lily St James who grew up with abusive parents ( and thereforeis never here for Any toxic bullshit from Anyone), sees Lorelai as a second mom,  and has zero chill punches him in the face when he shows up at the inn and pretty much was “nah” from the start so...there’s that. 

mahiru shit the fuck off challenge

In Which I Bitch About Mahiru (kind of goes along with the takaya kagami what the fuck post and is about the same chapter but it’s just about her word choice)

Ok so also this is about the prologue of catastrophe book 5, in which Mahiru decides she needs to foreshadow major life events that will happen to Yu in eight years and thinks it’s funny that his life is a tragedy when he’s still seven and crying about his parents

Mahiru walks into the thousand nights place and goes “I want to see your seraph boys” and they’re like “we hate you but ok, the one you can take away is at the orphanage so IDK why you’re even here” and she’s like “I just want to monologue about my relationship problems to a 7 year old” and they’re like “fair but we’ll erase his memories bc we know you’re gonna foreshadow things” and she’s like “yes but I know he’ll remember because I’m so Special I’m going to make an impression on him forever” which like she’s kind of right, considering the recent chapters but it doesn’t mean I don’t still hate that

Like I hate that Mahiru makes valid points to Yu for all the wrong reasons. Literally all the wrong reasons like she’s all “yeah you should still live even if you’re a monster because you will need to protect people you love” which is something Yu still believes and basically makes up a LOT of his morals, but what Mahiru is taking that from is “I can kill as many people as I want because I want Guren to love me”

Also the fact that Yu is all like “I’m a demon” and Mahiru thinks it’s hilarious to say “you look human to me” when we know that he is literally the farthest thing from human??

Alkfdjslakdsjfla;sdjllds but thEN Mahiru feels the need to say like “oh, so many people are trying to kill me, there must be a rule among humans that the ones who don’t fit in have to dIE” which just literally translates to “People are trying to kill me because i’m Not Like Other Girls” Mahiru stop, she’s saying that because she’s trying to get a point across that you shouldn’t die just because other people want you to but you’re really not the best example of that Mahiru

The funniest thing is that Mahiru thinks that she’s somehow taught him a Great Life Lesson because she said she wasn’t like other girls I’m gonna commit toaster bath jfklsa;fdsjkla and thEN she has the A U D A C I T Y to say

“The question I asked him will stay in there, somewhere. Because it addresses the core of personhood. When the world tells you to lie down and die, should you? He’ll find an answer to that question, someday. And I have a sneaking suspicion that when he does, it will be in front of a certain someone I once loved...”

Um??? MAHIRU??? If you?? If you are fucking talking about what I think you’re talking about that is suddenly applicable and wasn’t when this book came out then I think I’m gonna need to take some Measures??? Why would Mahiru already know this? She literally has everything planned out to the MINUTE for what happens in the manga? Jesus christ Mahiru

I think this could honestly apply to,,, a lot of things. It could apply to back in the anime when Yu literally dies to save Guren and just straight up decides he’s gonna Not Die because he can do that I guess??

But it could also apply to... well. Chapter 90. What might happen in coming chapters with Yu and Guren applying to,,, all that stuff. It could also apply to the part where Mahiru is like “Yu do you remember me telling you all that” and Yu’s like “uh yeah my reason for living is Mika peace out” and MAHIRU YOU B I T C H I swear to GOD if she PLANNED THAT OUT

djsakld;fslaskjf so then I think the thousand nights guys are getting fed up with her too and they’re like “here are our spicy apocalypse beasts we made them we control them and if we wanted to we could tell them to r*pe you Right Now” and Mahiru’s reaction to that is basically just “cool”

hhhhhhhhhhh not to mention when she says “yes i am a demon,,, a dEmon who Yearns for L o v e” and then a page later goes “yknow I don’t think I actually have a heart” Mahiru literally make up your mind

And t h e n it gets even BETTER when it’s like, Yu is so touch starved and broken that he’d rather have this teenager bitching about her relationship issues than no one so he’s like “you’re leaving??” and she’s like...

“I am... I have my own battle to fight, so you’ll have to stay strong on your own. You do that, and someday I’ll come back to let you out of here.”

Oh. Mahiru. You did not just say that. She promises that when she knows that everything she’s saying is so fake, that she’s using him, that she’s going to actually fucking take away everything he loves and actually BREAK him and she has the AUDACITY to say “hang in there buddy I’ll save you :)))))”

as;ldkfjads and the cherry on top is when she says “see you later, demon boy” and fucking leaves, full well knowing shit like that is the entire cause of his trauma and just generally a really hurtful thing to say when he’s literally saying “i’m a demon I deserve to die” three seconds ago mahiru you can’t tell a traumatized seven year old you’re going to save them and then call them a personalized fucking slur five seconds later

oh oh oh wait there’s one more thing, when he asks “so what’s the point in living” and Mahiru turns around to say “I don’t think any human living is worth anything” like thanks that definitely helped Yu, then going on to say “Everyone is just a cog in the end. Get rid of this or that cog and the next one will be born soon enough to take its place” which hmmmm might be a reference to Yu being a clone but well

I’ve got one more thing to say about this chapter in relation to Mahiru’s words to Yu but that one relates to Mikayuu so I’m gonna make it another one, this is getting so long