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quitealotofsodapop · 2 months

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[Once Mac learned that Wukong got possessed trying to take down LBD, the shadow monkey almost 99% decided that he wasn't going to lose his King to that bony biotch. And depeneding on how messy the Samadhi Fire ritual goes, the last thing Wukong says to Macaque is along the lines of "You ruined everything!", and Macaque doesn't want those to be the last words he hears his King say…] + [And soon Macaque started to remember how much him and Wukong discussed Having a family once the war on heaven was over, and how much they both wanted to be parents…]

he spent this whole time trying to put the... whole thing with Wukong on hold until he was free from LBD's control. keyword being trying, ofc. things don't really work like that when you're tasked with hunting the other monkey in question and his friends down, so he accidently made things worse and know he's trying to reign everything back in long enough to have even a chance to fix it.

[Its also around the time Macaque really has it sink in that; "Oh sh-t. I attacked the Monk and fought Wukong when he was pregnant. No wonder he killed me." He isn't sure how to build himself up to discussing this fact with Wukong yet, but he'll get there.]

it's probably something he decides to bring up shortly after the whole s4 debacle. Between the fight from right before ep 1 to the world almost ending again, he doesn't want to risk his death potentially being another surprise argument that gets out of hand or risk another world ending event getting in the way of any substantial healing again. he knows disagreements are normal and even healthy in any kind of relationship, lest the relationship be codependent, but he'd rather not fight about that.

[Red's hair is ruined with baby monkey drool by the time someone gets Yuebei off of him.] + [Nezha, angry flames flaring up: "You mean to tell me that you were "with Stone Egg" during the ritual to separate the Samadhi Fire!? She could have suffered the same fate as Ao Lie!" Wukong, guilt-ridden: "Yeah. Don't remind me. She kicked me non-stop for days afterwards."] + [Yuebei: *tries grabbing Nezha's skates to test the "spicyness"*]

Wukong is laughing at Red the whole time.

Ne Zha def feels a bit guilty about his first reaction being to bring up Ao Lie's death, probably knowing how Wukong feels about it.

and aww no, no I'm picturing Wukong so in pain from Yuebei's distress that he's basically bedridden. I imagine he'd spend this time resting with Ao Lie until they both recovered (atleast on the surface) while the other pilgrims fuss over both of them.

Ne zha can only squawk indignantly when Yuebei manages to get her mouth around one of his rings, immediately trying to pry it from her little jaws. with him and Wukong combined it takes 10 minutes and the promise of a lot of fruit to get her off. luckily the rings aren't perpetually on fire.

[And the dragon's last words to assure his friend that he never blamed him for the accident, nor his baby. Ao Lie was just sad that he'd never be able to meet the cub in this lifetime. He just wants Wukong to stop being so hard on himself for it. If only the dragon he tell him that in person.]

Scroll of memory! Ao Lie already broke the mold by interacting with Mei, he breaks it again when MK + Macaque are scroll diving for Wukong by telling him to pass on the message to the king that his stance on the matter hasn't changed.

[He def makes an awkward apology once they run into eachother at the start of S3. He refuses to let Wukong get into danger or exert himself tho - Nezha's a momma's boy at heart after all.]

Wukong insists it's fine, and that Ne Zha couldn't have known that he kept it from basically everyone, but Ne Zha still feels bad about everything regarding the ritual. he intends to make up for it by doing whatever he can to protect Wukong and his little one now (even if Wukong insists its not nessecary)

[Spider Queen hears the sounds of a thousand knuckles cracking and realises that she's looking at the person who might as well be the Monkey King's Mama. SQ ain't even mad by the end of it.] + [And although SQ kinda trusts the demon a little more, she's far more hesistant to step on the Monkey King's toes than before if his Mama's gonna respond. SQ is a lot more scheming for the rest of S2.]

I love the mental image of Guan Yin using their hundred hands to aid in their righteous beat down

Spoder Queen knows she kinda deserved this, she did put a heavily pregnant person who is practically made of magic in a magic draining web. she was basically asking for this.

she will take this loss with the dignity and grace of the queen (believes she) is and not bother Wukong again (yet) she promises- please don't punch her again.

[LBD almost in the same fashion it tried absorbing the Samadhi Fire so many years ago - guess his baby found the ancient demoness "less spicy".] + [BTW I love the art you did for this scene!! Stone Egg had enough of LBD's nonsense and was Hangry, and Bama had spoken some sense into Baba, and now Nom NOM NOMNOM.]

she is very icy!

and I'm glad you like the art!

[Oh gosh Macaque realising that the baby looking like him brings Wukong joy too would make him cry even harder. He almost cost his mate everything by risking the world over his own debt to the Bone demon. Mac would gladly have died all over again if it kept the baby safe.]

Macaque is an inconsolable sobbing mess of emotions for a while after first meeting Yuebei, for a lot of reasons. and imagine how hard he cries when Wukong first names her out loud officially calling her "Sun Yuebei Xing" for the first time, Yuebei being a moon inspired/adjacent name. he's practically wailing at one point.

[She plants a big kiss on Yuebei's forehead, forgetting that her lipstick stains. Her husband chuckles, still teary-eyed, at his wife's embarassment at planting a big kiss mark on the baby's head.] + [MK is having unknown instinctual urge to curl up with Yuebei (his honorary sister) next to the other monkeys. Pigsy laughs that MK did the same with his fave plushie for years.]

Wukong laughs at the befuddled chirp Yuebei makes when PIF kisses her.

he would also very much welcome MK into his nest with his sleepy little family.

[Also, Mac is def the kinda guy to use exaggerated versions of the Brotherhood's voices when narrating villain characters in Yuebei's books. The little raspberry noises (or "Boos" as Mac likens them to) she makes at the voices encourages him even further.]

I love this. He so would. Wukong would be laughing his tail off the first time he hears Macaque voicing a villain with an over exaggerated Peng voice, Wukong actively encourages him to do this as well.

[And considering Yellowtusk is the only one with the sense to feed and bathe the hostage infant, he's not surprised when she turns on Azure and Peng specifically.]

I'm now thinking of a scene where yellowtusk manages to get Yuebei away from the others long enough to give her bath, and she's fussy about it but baths with her Baba and Bama in the mountains hot springs were usually fun and calm and she felt better afterwards so she didn't put up much of a fight when Yellowtusk tried to get her into the water. anything that reminded her of her parents is comforting right now. but she's crying the whole time and chirping for her parents as she's very far from home and with no one she recognizes, but this elephant is giving her fruit and cleaning her as best he can, so maybe he's okay? she ends up clinging to his trunk like how'd she would cling around her parents neck, and thats how he got his sore trunk during Yuebei's "tantrum". it wasn't her getting mad at him the same way she got mad at Azure and Peng, she was just scared and clung to the first person she felt was safe with, her uncontrolled baby strength leaving it's mark despite him being the only one she didn't really feel threatened by.

kinda sad note on Yuebe missing her parents, but I feel like she'd have seperation anxiety after the s4 debacle. she needs at least one of her parents in the room with her at all times when she's awake or she's wailing at the top of her lungs.

[Some of Peng's feathers are stolen too (Yuebei had a mouthful of them) and Macaque and Sandy turned the feathers into a cat toy. Mo and Yuebei both adore it.]

this is amazing Macaque would so let Yuebei keep a "trophy" of her victory over Peng in the form of a baby appropriate toy. he also is def never letting Peng live down that they lost to a baby if they ever meet face to face again. hell, they day he got Yuebei back he was ragging on Peng for their loss before the bird could even be peeled off the ground

Sequel to this Slow Boiled au post.

[he spent this whole time trying to put the... whole thing with Wukong on hold until he was free from LBD's control. keyword being trying, ofc.]

Yeah, Macaque is having a not-so-fun time trying to get used to being alive again, being still in love with his former mate (who killed him), having his soul indebted to a omnicidal Bone Demon, his former mate having a baby etc...

After finding out about MK and the Stone Egg; Mac was sorta half-hoping that he could duck LBD enough to slowly absorb the whole Wukong situation, maybe meet up with some old allies, get some answers, that sort of thing. The Mayor kidnapping him really threw those plans out the window.

[it's probably something he decides to bring up shortly after the whole s4 debacle. Between the fight from right before ep 1 to the world almost ending again, he doesn't want to risk his death potentially being another surprise argument that gets out of hand or risk another world ending event getting in the way of any substantial healing again.]

It's def a super awkward thing to approach, especially with Yuebi literally just being born and stuff.

Wukong now knows that Mac knows, and is super guilty for not having told him back then. At the same time, Wukong is confused why Max seems so... ok with it suddenly??? Like;

Wukong: "Dude, I killed you." Mac: "Yeah, and I attacked you while you were carrying a baby. Lets call it even." Wukong: "You didn't *know* at the time!" Mac: "Don't matter. Lets just drop it ok?"

Mac does have his own super complex issues regarding the whole "being killed by your former mate"-thing, but in his mind - he really could have killed Wukong and Yuebei if he hadn't been careful. He also knows that in his heart-of-hearts, he wouldn't have even considered fighting Wukong had he known about the Stone Egg ahead of time. He ultimately doesnt want to open up any old wounds Wukong has from the incident since he's been living with the outcome of that fight far longer than Mac has.

Bumping around Wukong's memories in S4 really dredges Mac's buried resentment and confusion about the last fight to the surface. Questions like; Why was Wukong protecting the monk that hurt him? Why was Wukong going on this Journey and not returning to his throne? Why did he hide the Stone Egg from the world?

MK is politely trying his best to let Mac vent to him about what happened between him and Wukong, but ofc they quickly stumble into MK's shared history with the Monkey King.

Lots of hugs, peaches, and family counselling is required afterwards, not doubts about that.

[and aww no, no I'm picturing Wukong so in pain from Yuebei's distress that he's basically bedridden. I imagine he'd spend this time resting with Ao Lie until they both recovered (atleast on the surface) while the other pilgrims fuss over both of them.]

Ao Lie and Wukong are quickly panicking over eachother while their other bros are forcing them to rest after the Samadhi Fire Ritual. Wukong was in so much pain that he was convinced that he was going into labor, or that he even lost Yuebei as a result of joining in the Ritual. Eventually though, the Stone Egg calmed down. Ao Lie's pain did not.

[Ne zha can only squawk indignantly when Yuebei manages to get her mouth around one of his rings, immediately trying to pry it from her little jaws. with him and Wukong combined it takes 10 minutes and the promise of a lot of fruit to get her off. luckily the rings aren't perpetually on fire.]

Yuebei mistook the rings as chew toys and liked the shiny gold colour. It takes Nezha a solid minute of apologizing to Wukong for his past behavior to notice that the little monkey cub has clamped her mouth over one of his skates. Wukong is laughing hysterically, especially as Nezha tries his best to gently remove the ring from Yuebei's mouth without activating it. Luckily all it takes to distract the baby is for Experienced Dad™ Pigsy to pull the oldest trick in the book.

Pigsy: "Got your nose, mooncake!" Yuebei, drops ring: :O! Nezha, quickly picks it up: "How did you know to do that?" Pigsy, still holding Yuebei's "nose" as the baby grabs at him: "You'd swear MK was half-garbage disposal from how much stuff he tried to eat as a toddler. Stealing his nose always worked." Wukong, a little wistful: "Tell me more, please?" Pigsy: "Sure thing. Guess little monkeys aren't much different from little MKs." *gives Yuebei her nose back*

Nezha makes note of hiding anything flammable whenever he visits the monkeys.

[Scroll of memory! Ao Lie already broke the mold by interacting with Mei, he breaks it again when MK + Macaque are scroll diving for Wukong by telling him to pass on the message to the king that his stance on the matter hasn't changed.]

Oh gosh... Imagine this though... Wukong trapped in the Scroll, busting on through his memories. Suddenly he hears a familar voice...

Ao Lie: "Wow! She really did make us all wait, huh?" Wukong, frozen in his tracks: "What?" Wukong: (*slowly turns to see the memory of Ao Lie, far older/frailer than what Mei had seen, standing by and watching the memory of Yuebei's first day of life.*) Memory!Ao Lie, smiling: "She's a perfect little pup... Mei was right on the money when she called her a ball of cuteness! She really looks like you! The blue eyes are a little unexpected, but considering that your mate dragged himself out of Diyu to be there - I guess anything could have happened!" Wukong, lip quivering: "No... you're just that memory curse. Ao Lie never got to see her! You're not real!" Memory!Ao Lie, frowning: "Why are you so stubborn to admit that it wasn't your fault? I really truly never blamed you, or her." Wukong, crying: "Why were you so ok with it? Because of me, the Samadhi Fire it... hurt you." Memory!Ao Lie: "I would rather die protecting my family than live and let them be hurt in my stead." (*quietly moves to hug Wukong*) "That includes you and your pup, Wukong. Always has." Wukong: (*now sobbing, hugging Memory!Ao Lie tight*)

Eventually the Memory!Ao Lie has to remind Wukong that he has friends to reunite with in the present. Wukong hesistates to leave Ao Lie alone again - the memory reassures him that he'll be fine as long as his pilgrim brother lives his life without the weight of the Ritual upon his shoulders. And to make sure to spoil Yuebei in his stead.

[Wukong insists it's fine, and that Ne Zha couldn't have known that he kept it from basically everyone, but Ne Zha still feels bad about everything regarding the ritual. he intends to make up for it by doing whatever he can to protect Wukong and his little one now (even if Wukong insists its not nessecary)]

Ofc Nezha feels like garbage for treating Wukong's actions during the Ritual as a failing.

Wukong thinks he has it bad with DBK, PIF, and Pigsy forcing him to rest? Imagine how stubborn Nezha is when he's worried over the Monkey King.

[I love the mental image of Guan Yin using their hundred hands to aid in their righteous beat down] + [she will take this loss with the dignity and grace of the queen (believes she) is and not bother Wukong again (yet) she promises- please don't punch her again.]

Spider Queen isn't sure who she's afraid of more; the spooky ancient bone demon pretending to be a little girl, or the 1000 Armed Bodhisattva that just whooped her hard (but mercifully let her live) for hooking the Monkey King to the power-draining Spider Mech. Spider Queen makes sure not to directly target or interact with the Monkey King or his protege if she can for the rest of S2.

The Spider Gang has nightmares of Guanyin coming to beat the rest of them up like she's a Jojo stand.

[she is very icy! and I'm glad you like the art!]

It's really great art!!

Also LBD's soul probably tasted like shaved ice with a hint of chalk. Lots of it, but pretty bland. It filled up Yuebei at least!

[Macaque is an inconsolable sobbing mess of emotions for a while after first meeting Yuebei, for a lot of reasons. and imagine how hard he cries when Wukong first names her out loud officially calling her "Sun Yuebei Xing" for the first time, Yuebei being a moon inspired/adjacent name. he's practically wailing at one point.]

Aww ohoho! Macaque makes so many joyous squeaking/hooting sounds during Yuebei's arrival. To hear that Wukong has named her his little "Moon Comet Star" just makes him cry harder, especially with how casually Wukong names her. Like he'd had it it long before this moment, before he even knew that Macaque was back in his life.

I think in older Chinese traditions, the parents typically wait for the Man Yue (30 Days) celebration to publically announce the baby's name. But I bet Wukong is just so happy that he tells everyone Yuebei's name long before that time.

Nezha insisted on being at Yuebei's Man Yue to bless her, as that's his whole Patron God of Children thing.

[Wukong laughs at the befuddled chirp Yuebei makes when PIF kisses her. he would also very much welcome MK into his nest with his sleepy little family.]

There's def a bunch of photos of the incident with Yuebei looking at PIF with the most confused doe-eyed look ever, a huge red kiss mark on her head. The Princess looking embarassed and adoring all at once. It's PIF anf DBK's fave baby photo of Yuebei - besides the one where she tried eating Red Son's hair.

MK is very tired after the battle, so the gang has no problem just letting the kid rest in the nest with the monkeys. t

[I love this. He so would. Wukong would be laughing his tail off the first time he hears Macaque voicing a villain with an over exaggerated Peng voice, Wukong actively encourages him to do this as well.]

Heehee, Macaque finally agrees to read Yuebei a kids-friendly version of JTTW at MK's insistence, and when he gets to Camel Ridge, he pauses before looking towards Wukong for confirmation. At Wukong's excited nod, Macaque grins evily.

Macaque, narrating: "In the kingdom of Lion Camel Ridge, there lived three Great Demon Kings." Macaque, exaggerating the real voices: "Azure Lion! Yellow Tusked Elephant! And the Golden-Winged Peng!" Yuebei: *blows raspberry at the villains!* >:P! Macaque, normal voice: "Yeah, boo! These guys sucked!" Wukong: *laughing hysterically!* MK, sitting cross-legged on the floor: "Did they really sound like that?" Wukong, trying hard not to cry from laughter: "It's closer than you think!"

Macaque also deliberately exaggerates the voices of their allies like PIF and DBK so Yuebei doesn't accidentally associate their voices with the muddy past shown in the book.

[I'm now thinking of a scene where yellowtusk manages to get Yuebei away from the others long enough to give her bath, and she's fussy about it but baths with her Baba and Bama in the mountains hot springs were usually fun and calm and she felt better afterwards so she didn't put up much of a fight when Yellowtusk tried to get her into the water. anything that reminded her of her parents is comforting right now. but she's crying the whole time and chirping for her parents as she's very far from home and with no one she recognizes, but this elephant is giving her fruit and cleaning her as best he can, so maybe he's okay? she ends up clinging to his trunk like how'd she would cling around her parents neck, and thats how he got his sore trunk during Yuebei's "tantrum".]

Awwww..... :(

Yellow Tusk brings up the matter shortly after their takeover. Their former ally's cub is very fussy (especially since Azure has had her for about half a day now) and is starting to smell... ripe. Peng takes one sniff and recoils in disgust. Azure is clueless and isn't sure if monkey cubs work like lion cubs or not. Yellow Tusk has the sense to ask the remaining servants for help with tending to the infant - a group of seven brave orchard maidens stepped forward to run the baby a bath and prepare her a meal. Yellow Tusk is sure that he recognises them.

Baby monkeys instinctively cling to whatever is nearby - especially in situations where they feel scared or unsafe. So when the elephant gently put Yuebei in the warm bathwater and offered her mashed fruit, she instinctively clasped around his trunk like it was the arm of her parents, making sad hooing sounds as she sucked on her fingers. Yellow Tusk felt his heart break at the sight. He simply cannot fathom harming her in any sense of the word.

Azure must be mad to think that Sun Wukong won't kill them all to ensure this child's safety.

[kinda sad note on Yuebe missing her parents, but I feel like she'd have seperation anxiety after the s4 debacle. she needs at least one of her parents in the room with her at all times when she's awake or she's wailing at the top of her lungs.]

Absolutely.

Baby monkeys are already super clingy - the trauma of Yuebei's kidnapping during S4 only intensified this. She fears that if either of her parents leave the room, that they might not come back. Considering it was her parents arguing and "something" (aka the Scroll) taking her Baba away preceeded her kidnapping...

The first few times it happens, Wukong and Mac + the extended fam are terrified and aren't sure *why* Yuebei is so distressed. Eventually they figure out it's her anxiety, and are able to at least keep a clone posted to ease the worst of her worries when the others babysit. MK thankfully is one of the figures that Yuebei is calm around, and while she loves her uncles and aunts; Yuebei still starts wailing after a few minutes of realizing that she can't find her Baba or Bama.

It takes a long time for the baby monkey to be comfortable to not have her parents in sight. And considering how worried and overprotective that Wukong and Mac can be of her, they aren't in any rush to force her independance.

[this is amazing Macaque would so let Yuebei keep a "trophy" of her victory over Peng in the form of a baby appropriate toy. he also is def never letting Peng live down that they lost to a baby if they ever meet face to face again. hell, they day he got Yuebei back he was ragging on Peng for their loss before the bird could even be peeled off the ground]

Imagine the smug look on Macaque's face as he sees Peng reduced to a chicken burger on the ground by a *baby* with not even a tooth in her head. Mac would make a show of picking up his baby girl and kissing her all over while commenting in baby-talk; "Did you have fun with the birdy and kitty, moonlight? Yeah? Do you want Bama to take something to remember your little play date?"

And before Peng could make a snarking comment, they squawk! at the feeling of feathers being removed. They look up and see Yuebei playing with a handful of golden feathers. The Shadow Monkey grinning like a cat who's caught a mouse. The celestial bird faints from embarassment.

Macaque has one of the feathers preserved as a bookmark. It brings him great joy.

Again tysm for being so invested in this au!

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pablitogavii · 10 months

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Vacation Mornings

Summary: What does it look like when you get to spend mornings together when pablo is on vacation <33

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Reader

Warnings: none just pure fluff <33

You woke up first so you turned around in Pablo's arms smiling at his peaceful sleepy face knowing just how much he needs sleep after the draining season he had.

When you look at him, he was only your Pablo, an 18 years old sleeping baby, but then you remember all of his achievements and how he has to spend most of his year being the professional player.

When he finally had a break, you wanted him to rest up and recover as much as possible so you decided to let him sleep in for as long as he wants to in the next month.

Your hand touch his face gently careful not to wake him up as you slowly start leaving kisses to his cheeks, then his neck and chest getting a little too much into it. You heard his giggles looking up feeling guilty for actually waking him up but he didn't seem to mind.

"Mmm I love vacation mornings..." he said and you blush moving up and kissing his lips lovingly as he pulled you on top of hi deepening the kiss and holding you tightly in his arms.

"I'm sorry I woke you up cariño.." you say but he shook his head kissing your lips again while his hands went through your curls down your back slowly.

"I could never complain being woken up by your kisses anjo..if only I can always wake up like this" he said sighing and you smiled touching his face and pecking his lips.

"Then I am going to wake you up like this every morning during this vacation.." you said and he smiled nodding his head before you kissed some more.

"Y/n! Should I wear this dress?" Aurora just rushed into the bedroom and Pablo jumped putting the blanket over you on top of him instinctively although you weren't even naked.

"Don't you know how to knock!?" Pablo said and you giggled when Aurora flipped him off and walked to show you the pictures of the dress she was talking about. It looked very nice on her and you said she should wear it.

"Oh and I knew you weren't naked since for the first time there was no noises and I could sleep!" Aurora said before rushing to the door as Pablo threw a small pillow at her.

"I love staying at home for vacation with you but maybe we start locking that door preciosa.." he said and you giggled nodding your head kissing him again.

"This is where we left off, isn't it cariño??" you said and he smiled kissing you again this time with a bit more strength and you moaned quietly.

"Mhmm..morning besitos..I'm going to get hooked on them" he said and you smiled into the kiss nodding your head before laying down on his chest and just cuddling up some more until it's the time to start your day.

When you walked downstairs finally meeting his family already done with the breakfast, you walked up to Belen who giggled at her sleepy son who saw searching for a cup to make himself coffee.

"So grumpy in the morning..like his papa" Belen said and you chuckled walking up to Pablo taking the cup and telling him you'll take it and he should go eat something.

"Te amo princesa..graciass" he said like a whiny child and you giggle nodding your head as he pecked your lips and sit down with his dad to eat some breakfast. You asked Sr. Gavi if he wanted coffee but he politely declined saying he already had his earlier.

"Made you and me some oats, hermanita" Aurora gave me the bowl and I sent her a kiss before finishing Pablo's coffee while munching on it and then bringing it to him kissing the side of his head.

He took it smiling and pulling me to sit on his leg which I obliged as we talked to his dad while finishing our breakfast. He kissed my shoulder softly before sipping on his coffee and finishing his breakfast.

"You kids want to have a pool day today??" Belen said and Aurora nodded at the same time as me while Pablo whined but seeing how excited I was about her he also agreed.

"You're lucky yo te amo muchisimo princesa!" he said and you giggled nodding your head and kissing his lips before you both went upstairs to change into some swimsuits and have another amaizng day on vacation together <33

I know it's short but I really like this idea of Pablo being grumpy in the morning hehe <33

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nullbutler · 6 months

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because it's impossible to truly get into the depths of a very hyper specific situation, here's a checklist of 'am I being groomed' [specifically for ONLINE SPACES]

keep in mind that grooming, in this sense, could not be seen as inherently rigged for sexual exploitation. there are a lot of different examples. this also works as a checklist of the intrusive worry of 'am I accidentally grooming someone.' as long as you aren't doing any of that, there's no reason you'd think you would be a groomer. this isn't even age specific. it can happen to anyone at any time if they are susceptible.

none of these specifically mean anything, but together/if added together, they should be cause for alarm

any victim of this sort of behavior should know: it's not your fault, you can always recover, you deserve better friends, you deserve to be happy, you don't deserve to be isolated

I honest to god felt the same way about a year ago. And, now, while I'm still coming to terms with it, I have never been more happy and sure of myself now that I'm out of the situation. and I want the same for you, genuinely. it's isolating and bizarre.

and here: the checklist

are they showing you pornography or explicit content that makes you uncomfortable?

are they encouraging you to seek out specific pornography?

is that pornography in a moral sense illegal?

are they encouraging you to do illegal things or things that might put you in danger?

do you wonder if they ever actually care about you?

do they only talk to you when you're emotionally vulnerable?

do you feel like you need to act outside of how you'd typically act to please them?

do you feel like you need to expose yourself to things you wouldn't normally want to to please them?

do you feel isolated from people outside of the opinions they hold?

do you feel like 'if everyone knew who I really was, they'd hate me?"

do you feel like you're secretly a bad person

do you feel like you can't hold any moral stance on issues because your morals are too far gone?

do you feel like you can defend heinous actions because you (and specifically this other person) are just as guilty your selves

are they telling you that they're the only person/group of people who can 'fix' an issue you have?

are they telling you that looking at upsetting and triggering material is the only way to fix yourself?

are they making you feel as though you don't have a choice about something about yourself?

are they telling you to disregard belief systems that are in place to keep you safe?

are they desensitizing you to things (showing you something bad, showing you something bad, showing you something worse; you don't perceive it as worse)

do you feel like their values are more important than your own morals?

do you feel like you're beyond saving because of what they've told you?

The best course of action to this kind of thing isn't even legal based because that's impossible to determine/prove; it's : please leave. please find somewhere safe to go.

#psa #cw grooming #serious post #textpost #honestly you can come to me if you relate to this kind of thing VERY hard i can commiserate w you #im not saying im at all liscensed but sometimes you need someone to talk this out with #+ I get it

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harunayuuka2060 · 2 years

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MC: *feeding Luke*

Luke: *his cheeks puffing whenever he chews the food*

MC: *feels satisfaction that he's now fully-recovered*

Luke: MC?

MC: ?

Luke: Can I visit you in the House Of Lamentation?

MC: ...

MC: Luke, you know you're always free to go there.

Luke: *smiles* Because it's been a while.

MC: ...

MC: I'm sorry.

Luke: Why are you apologizing? I didn't say that to make you feel guilty.

MC: ...

Luke: *gets the plate from them and set it aside*

Luke: *holds both of their hands* But next time, don't end our friendship like that or you'll see me get mad. Hmph! *puffing his cheeks*

MC: ...

MC: *nods*

Luke: *giggles*

Simeon: *enters the room* Luke? Ah, MC. You're here. Good. I need to talk to both of you.

Luke: Huh?

Simeon: Luke, after you get discharged from this hospital, we will go back to Celestial Realm.

Luke and MC: *both look shocked*

Luke: I-Isn't that too sudden? We haven't finished the student exchange program yet—

Simeon: Diavolo said that it had to be postponed.

Luke: Oh...

MC: ...

MC: Does that mean Luke has no reason to stay here?

Simeon: Yes, MC. I'm afraid.

MC: ...

Luke: But we just got— *sad frowns*— How about extending my stay here for a few days?

Simeon: *smiles understandingly* I'll ask.

*Simeon managed to talk it out and Luke was allowed to stay one more week in Devildom*

Luke and MC: *has been spending the remaining time cuddling in their room while MC tells him stories told by their mother when she was still alive*

MC: In the end, the hawk and the rabbit had to depart separately.

Luke: That's quite sad...

MC: ...

MC: But mother said, the hawk continued to protect the rabbit from the distance. Stopping other hawks from hunting the rabbit.

Luke: ...

Luke: Was the hawk being careful though?

MC: *nods*

Luke: Would it continue to eat its meal and be healthy?

MC: *nods*

Luke: That's good! Because I'm sure the rabbit will see them again!

MC: ...

MC: *nods* No matter how much time passes, I'll be still your friend.

Luke: Hm! Maybe in another 1000 years, I'll be an archangel! Then, I'll be a proper big brother to you!

MC: You're already a proper big brother to me.

Luke: No! Big brothers cuddle! Not being cuddled!

MC: ...

MC: *hugs him tighter*

Luke: ...

Luke: *tearing up* Always take care of yourself, okay?

MC: *nods*

Levi: I've heard that Luke already left.

Mammon: Yeah. Simeon came to fetch him.

Levi: ...

Levi: How about MC?

Mammon: They didn't say anything.

Levi: ...

Mammon: What? You're not thinking of going in there so you can comfort them, are you?

Mammon: *mutters* Trying to replace Luke as soon as he left.

Levi: *blushes in embarrassment* I'm not thinking that way! And besides, it's not like I see MC as a friend or a sibling—

Asmo: Ooh~! Did I hear that right?

Levi: A-Asmo! What are you doing here?

Asmo: Too bad, Levi. You're too late.

Levi: Huh? What do you mean?

Asmo: I'm sure it's more likely that MC will end up with Beel. Not you or Satan.

Levi: ...

Mammon: How come?

Asmo: Eh? You didn't know? Before Luke left—

Luke: Beelzebub! Make sure no demons will try to make a move on MC while I'm away!

Beel: ...

Beel: Not even me?

Luke: Wha— What do you mean about that?! Of course that includes you!

Simeon: Luke, I think it isn't right that you restrict MC from having a relationship. *sweat drop*

Luke: I'm not restricting them! It's just that— no one deserves them here in Devildom!

Beel: Um... Me?

MC: ...

MC: I don't remember you being interested in me.

Beel: I am. I'm just not being obvious.

Asmo: And that's how it went.

Levi: ...

Mammon: Yo, bro? Are you okay?

Levi: *fumes* I'm not okay! Tell me where Beel is! How dare he be sneaky?! *runs to find him*

Mammon: ...

Mammon: You just made that up, didn't you?

Asmo: Nope. That's totally true.

Mammon: Er. People are forgetting that MC is still scary and intimidating.

Asmo: Lucifer is scary and intimidating but almost everyone loves him.

Mammon: Good point.

#obey me #obey me mc #obey me luke #obey me simeon #obey me mammon #obey me levi #obey me asmo #obey me beel #misunderstood!mc

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caritobbg · 1 year

Text

Coffee Disaster - P1

Bucky Barnes x Barista!Reader x Father Figure!Tony.

Summary: Tony and Bucky's feud has reached its limit of tolerance. What can happen when you leave a supersoldier and Iron Man alone for a few minutes? Answer: disaster.

A/N: well, this is my first Bucky's oneshot! This idea was a dream i had a couple of days ago 😅 I couldn't let it go, so I decided to write it. It might be a multi-chapter because of everything I've been writing 😅😂.

I hope you like it and enjoy it as much as I did while I was writing this story 🥺

TW: SO MUCH ANGST - Bucky&Tony being stupid - angry reader (yes, it's a warning) - sad Bucky - heartbreak

English isn't my first language. Sorry if there's any mistakes 😅

Tag: @ro-is-struggling @luciasimmer96 @themorningsunshine @mads-weasley @aquanova99 @alexsoenomel (if you wanna be tagged, just tell me 🥺❤️)

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

"Y/N's Coffee Talk - CLOSED INDEFINITELY".

"Reason: ANTHONY EDWARD STARK - JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES".

Those were the signs that had all the people in the Avengers Tower furious. The tower's barista had decided to close her coffee bar because of a LITTLE INCIDENT a few days before between her father figure and the man she had fallen in love with. Although they didn't know what happened, they could imagine why Y/N was more than upset with them.

The enmity between them reached its limit for such a silly reason! They both wanted the best for her, but their differences did the opposite.

Neither spoke as they pulled out and threw away what was destroyed, each in their own mind carefully planning every step to take to recover that broken relationship and avoid every person in the tower lining up to have their heads as a reward.

Bucky: We should get to work - breaking the overwhelming silence and finishing throwing the last piece of broken wood into the dumpster - this has gone far enough.

Tony: I know - feeling just as guilty - Y/n had put a lot of effort into her work to get all this done.

Bucky: we'll have to do our best to reverse this situation.

Bruce: I want to talk to you two -approaching them with Nat- what did you do to leave the place like that? You know that y/n...

Tony: Yeah yeah, we know - rolling his eyes - that's why we're going to get to work right away.

Nat: Can we know what happened? Steve didn't give details, but even he's itching to rip your heads off.

Tony: It's a long story, but...

Bruce: start talking - impatient

Bucky: what happened was...

Flashback:

Y/N: Good morning James - opening the door and letting out the beautiful smell of freshly brewed coffee - the usual? -with her trademark smile -double shot of espresso with a spoonful of sugar?

Bucky: Good morning Y/N/N -smiling at him- yes, please.

Y/N: Funny so early in the morning here, I thought you were going for a run with Sam?

Bucky: I was -laughing- I needed a moment of peace before the birdbrain makes me kill him -she just laughed and shook her head- also...-dubiously- I wanted to talk something with you

Y/N: mm? What is it? -purging her machine to place the sieved filter holder in it

Bucky: I wanted to know if...

Y/N: Oh no -pulling out his phone-

Bucky: What's wrong?

Y/N: Steve promised to help me upload the new order, they brought beans from Ethiopia, they are some of the best and with an indescribable flavour! -anxious and happy- and it looks like it's already arrived because he just texted me to say it's downstairs.

Bucky: uh.. Ok, it can wait -giving him a warm smile- don't worry.

Y/N: -serving his coffee- are you sure you don't want to tell me now?

Bucky: really doll, don't worry. I'll tell you later and... You make the best coffees in the world

Tony: Speaking of coffee, how about my cappuccino? -looking at the scene before his eyes- I thought it would be ready by now.

Y/N: You're going to have to wait Stark, until I get back I'm not going to make you your beloved cappuccino -passing by his side and grabbing a list of the order-.

Tony: But...

Bucky: Leave her alone Tony, Steve's waiting for her downstairs.

Tony: Did I ask you something?

Bucky: Don't rush her, she's got to go get...

Tony: -ignoring him- come on girl, I need your cappuccinos- behaving like a little kid

Y/N: -hanging up her apron- Tony, wait for me in about... -looking at the time- 30 minutes and I'll do it. I'm not leaving Steve alone downstairs with the three bags of coffee at 3kg each!

Tony: Fine -annoyed- but you'd better...

Bucky: Yeah yeah, make your cappuccino when she's back. Leave her alone Stark

Tony: Shut your mouth Barnes, nobody asked you anything here.

Bucky: And what are you gonna do if i don't...

Y/N: OK YOU TWO -separating them- what did I tell you about arguing here?

Tony&Bucky: that you'll ban us from entering until we settle our differences.

Y/N: exactly -checking that nothing is missing- well, in 30 minutes I'll be back here. In the meantime -seriously- behave like the adults you are -leaving them and closing the door while putting up a "be right back" sign.

Tony: What are you doing here winter? -crossing his arms-

Bucky: None of your business, tin man - sitting down near the bar.

Tony: Uh-huh, right. You never miss your morning jog with Sam or Steve, something brought you here early.

You see, Tony considered Y/N like a daughter. Ever since he met her in that coffee shop in downtown NYC and, months after learning that she was out of work and that her parents had died -years before- in an accident, he swore he would protect her with everything in his power. And that protection included keeping a certain super-soldier away from her.

Bucky: I told you it's none of your business - texting Sam.

Tony: What do we have here... -pulling out his phone and checking it

Bucky: HEY! STARK, GIVE THAT BACK TO ME -chasing him all over the place until he stopped abruptly-

The big ironman couldn't believe his eyes. He kept seeing those messages over and over again.

{SW} AND? Did you tell her? What happened?

[BB] No, not yet.

{SW} Why?! Buck, you have to invite her! Don't waste your time!

Tony: Really Barnes?! I told you to stay away from her! You were going to ask her out!?

Bucky: so what? -putting his phone away- yeah, I want to ask her out, is there a problem with that?

Tony: I'm not going to let you....

Bucky: What you're not going to let? A retired, recovered assassin asking out his best friend?

Sure... "best friend." Since the day they met, Bucky can't get her out of his mind. Y/N was amazing, someone he could spend hours and hours talking to about whatever was on their minds, the one person who could calm him down when his nights were plagued by nightmares of his stormy past. His love for her reached a higher level where he loved her as more than just his best friend.

Tony: I told you, stay away from her -pushing him away-.

Bucky: Stark, I'm warning you -threatening- don't provoke me. You're not her real father.

Tony: Uhh that's scary, -mocking him- and no, I'm not her father, but I'll do anything to keep her away from the monster that...

A fist connecting directly to his face prevented him from speaking any further. Indeed, his provocation brought out the worst in the supersoldier. Tony landed on one of the tables, knocking it completely off and leaving only splinters.

Tony: -still giddy- that's how you want to play it, huh? -slowly getting up and wiping away the small drop of blood that was falling on his lip- we can fix it.

Bucky: Do it

And the fight began.

They both dodged all the blows of their nemesis with speed, though some of them landed on their bodies. They used EVERYTHING there was to defend themselves: chairs, tables, cups, anything they saw was a "weapon".

Bucky: come on tin, it doesn't have to end like this - throwing himself on top of Tony and putting his legs in a headlock on his neck.

Tony: I'm not going to let you beat me, Terminator.

Out of nowhere, a turbine noise is heard coming through the window.

Bucky: You're a... -One of the suit's gloves hits him and sends him flying to the bar where moments before Y/N was preparing the coffee.

Tony: -going to Bucky grabbing him by his clothes- now I'm going to give you what you deserve.

The door opens at that instant and they both go pale.

Steve: What the... -leaving the roasted coffee to one side and unable to believe what was before his eyes.

Y/N: Steve, what's wrong? -appearing from behind him- what...

Her eyes couldn't believe it. Her coffee shop, the place she had staked all her savings and dreams on, totally destroyed. From all the furnishings to the crockery and...

Y/N: m... My... My cafeteria... -looking all around- no... Nononono... WHAT DID YOU DO! -noting that Bucky was right on top of her espresso machine- YOU DESTROYED MY CARIMALLI! -looking at them furiously- DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I SAVED TO GET IT!!!!?????

Looking around, the two realised how much trouble they were in. Regret and shame at their behaviour were the first emotions they felt.

Tony: Y/N/N...

Y/N: - turning totally red - Anthony and James, I told you to behave like adults, not to fight like the two little boys you are, but it seems that every time someone asks you to do that, you ignore it - raising his voice even more and getting closer as they backed away and Steve was only an observer of the situation and enjoying every second - I told you I'd be back in 30 minutes, you promised me not to do anything, what did you do? DESTROYED WHAT MADE ME MOST HAPPY, -pushing them both, although it didn't do much to hurt them any more than they already were.

Anthony and James. Their full names. Steve slowly approached his side to avoid further altercations between the trio in front of him and to call for help in case something happened to Y/N.

Bucky: Doll, we're sorry. We made a really big mistake and....

Y/N: sorry isn't going to fix anything James - walking away with her hands shaking, eyes teary and agitated - this.... There's no turning back

Bucky: are you okay? -scared to see his condition

Y/N: No... -trying to breathe- I don't want you talking to or looking for me...either...both of you.... -her anxiety was reaching its peak- I need to leave. Steve... I don't... I don't feel well

Tony: princess, please -seeing her get out of there as fast as possible

The three men stood alone looking out over the war territory. Steve was disappointed that Bucky was letting Tony's provocations get the better of him, he knew this was going to happen someday, but not a fight on this scale.

Steve: -watching them for a moment- really? Bar fight?

Tony: Rogers, we know we screwed up and let the grudge get the worst of us, but I wasn't going to let Barnes make her suffer. It's HIS fault for starting this.

Bucky: MY FAULT? You started provoking me and treating me like something I'm not anymore.

Tony: Sure, you didn't throw the first punch, did you?

Steve: OK, ENOUGH! -seeing Steve angry wasn't an everyday occurrence- you have to fix this mess now and it better be soon. This ends now

F.R.I.D.A.Y: Captain Rogers, Miss Y/L/N needs your help.

Steve: What's going on?

F.R.I.D.A.Y: I detected that her stress levels are very high and she can't breathe. She is in her room.

Steve: tell her I'm on my way - scrubbing her face with his hands - clean up and start doing something. Now.

Tony: Now we're screwed.

______________________________________

Tony: And after that we saw Steve take her to the medical wing because her anxiety was getting worse and worse - feeling guilty about what caused that situation.

Bruce: You've got to be kidding me -in disbelief- did you really fight over her?

Bucky: Yeah -embarrassed- we realised too late what we did and ended up hurting her in the worst way.

Nat: By ignoring her and breaking her trust in both of us over a stupid argument?

Tony: Ouch.

Bucky: That hurt, but.... Yeah - wiping the dust off his hands - we'd better start now, there's no time to waste.

Tony: Yeah, but where do we start? -heading with everyone to the tower- we destroy her dream coffee shop.

Bruce: What does she like? -helping them a little, he felt sorry for these two- there's got to be something that you know about.

Bucky: -getting on the elevator- umm... one of the renovations she always wanted to do was to change the current colours for brighter ones and the chairs and tables for ones that...

Tony: well, that's a start - clasping his hands together - let's go to the lab to plan....

The doors opened and they found Y/N in the living room. Nat approached her slowly and placing a hand on her shoulder and only gave her a faint smile that faded as she saw Bucky, as Tony continued on his way to his office in the lift.

Bruce: Nat, I need you to help me with something, - understanding what was about to happen- now

Bucky: Y/N/N... -seeing that they were all alone as they disappeared through the kitchen doorway

Y/N: my dream was always to have a coffee shop of my own -sighing- no matter the place or the people, I always wanted that, besides starting college -the painting she was holding in her hands ended up broken in the trash before he could say a word- now I know that what everyone said was true.... I'm never going to be able to fulfil it. All thanks to you two

That broke Bucky.

Bucky: doll, don't say that, of course....

Y/N: no "doll" - annoyed - you let the provocations get to your head when I told you over a million times to ignore it!

Bucky: yeah, I know, I just didn't...

Y/N: I thought you'd changed James, that you weren't letting anger consume you anymore -disappointed

Bucky: what? -speechless- of course I don't let my past bring out the worst in me anymore, don't say those things, please.... -taking her hands- I wasn't thinking about what I was doing and...

Y/N: James. Stop it. - turning away from him with teary eyes - I asked you not to make a big deal out of it. You did the opposite. Everything's changed now. Oh, God! I even thought that... -biting her tongue- enough, it doesn't matter now.

Bucky: what did you think? -in a whisper and annoyed with himself- tell me

Y/N: nothing, it doesn't matter -getting up to leave

Bucky: don't go -taking her by the arm- please, tell me

Y/N: James, no, that's it.

Bucky: please, - locking his stormy eyes on hers- I want to know and I'll stop bothering you until I come up with a solution.

Y/N: -taking a deep breath- I liked you -letting go of his grip- I wanted to tell you that very day, I had worked up the courage. It's all gone now. -leaving him alone with his thoughts

He couldn't believe what he heard. Y/N, his best friend, had the same feelings as him, she reciprocated! On the one hand he wanted to jump up and down and scream with happiness, on the other hand he wanted to beat himself up for what his anger accomplished.

Slowly he walked to the bin where the picture was and curiously picked it up and was stunned. It was the collage with all the pinterest pictures they had taken together at the bar one night when neither of them could sleep. It took him a couple of minutes to react and go to Stark to start executing the plan.

Sam: Wow dude - bumping into him in the hallway - what's up?

Bucky: She likes me -shaken from running- she likes me and I ruined everything -showing him the painting- but I'll fix it.

Sam: - confused - and this is it?

Bucky: this is the dream coffee shop that Y/N always wanted - walking next to him - I'll do my best to recreate it in reality and make her happy - more than determined-.

Sam: so -crossing his arms- where do we start?

_________________________________________

Tell what you think guys 🥺 I will be uploading the following parts soon ❤️

#bucky barnes #bucky angst #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky x reader #bucky x reader angst #james barnes x reader #james barnes one shot #bucky fanfiction #Bucky x barista!reader #bucky barnes one shot

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gh0st-t0wn3 · 7 months

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You mentioned in your answer how DBK and PIF would take ACTION when they find their son absolutely exhausted laying his head on his desk ,passed out on a blueprint (probably) but what would be their REACTION, if it makes sence? Like the things going on in their heads? (I'm SO invested in this freaking thing I'm SO sorry----)

(this is very ooc, I know his parents are much worse in canon)

Absolute panic.

The first person to find Redson would be one of the Bull Clones who were patrolling the hallway that Redson's lab is in, it would notice the sudden silence and would request entry but after a few short minutes of no answer would enter anyways out of concern. After finding Redson in his weakened state it would immediately alert his parents who'd come running.

As I mentioned in my DBK and PIF headcanons, they both feel guilty about Redson's poor upbringing; PIF being too emotionally unstable about her husband to take care of him and DBK being sealed away for 500 years. Neither of them had much time to bond with him growing up, but finally have the chance to do so now that their family is together again; and even though they aren't quite sure how to show it they do truly care for Redson, so the news about their son being overworked to the point of being making himself sick would scare them.

DBK would be the one to take Redson to his room while PIF got any necessary medication, bandages for his blistered hands, etc; while the Bull Clones would be ordered clean up his workshop and put away any equipment that's been left out.

Due to how long Redson forced himself to stay awake it would be a good few hours, maybe a day, before he finally woke up again, and when he finally does, the Bull clone looking after him would update his parents on the situation.

DBK would be the most involved in his recovery, as it's the first time he's dealt with Redson while he's sick, he never got sick before he was sealed away so DBK would want to keep an eye on him and be as involved as possible to make sure he's okay and doesn't make his condition any worse, I don't think he'd trust the Bull Clones to look after him on their own.

DBK would be the one to make his meals (with the occasional help of PIF), he'd change Redsons sheets whenever they got dirty, he'd even move a chair into Redson's room to sleep there if he was feeling particularly sick, in case he needed something in the middle of the night. If DBK isn't able to be with Redson overnight, however, he'd ensure at least two Bull Clones are.

PIF truly does care for Redson, and she'd be grateful that he's okay, but I don't think she'd be as involved in his recovery as DBK. PIF seems like the kind of person who gets queezy at the idea of looking after sick people so if Redson was showing any signs of stress-induced illness she'd instead take care of him from afar. She'd help make his meals, get him fresh wet washcloths whenever necessary, a change of bandages, more medication, but she'd have a Bull clone or her husband bring said items to him rather than doing so herself, but would demand periodic updates about his condition nonetheless.

Once Redson has properly recovered enough that they allow him to leave his room again she'd talk to him about a better schedule and maintaining a good work/life balance.

Although they both have different ways of taking care of him, what's going on in their heads are the same: they'd both feel guilty about not noticing his behavior earlier, that they let him overwork himself to the point of passing out and never realized. After this event, though, they'd be sure to keep a better eye on him and make sure he doesn't work for too long at a time again.

(Don't be sorry, please, I love answering people's questions :) )

#lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid red son #monkie kid red son #hong hai'er #lego monkie kid princess iron fan #princess iron fan #lmk demon bull king #Gh0st ask

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zaenaris · 5 months

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I spoke with someone (who is anime only) and they told me that Koko wouldn't probably have gotten as much obesssed by money if he saved Akane and that Inupi was the one to have need of operations or he or he would have sseing how much Akane was upset because of her little brother's state.

Personally i'm not agree. Koko and Inupi were probably friends for years because Akane acted very familiar with Koko, so she knew him for a while.

And i'm sure that losing Inupi would have had a most terrible impact on Koko, because his feelings for Akane were a puppy crush and when he would have grow up our of it he would be shallowed by guilt to have not even thought to Inupi, to not have had enough money to save him. The feelings to be empty, the feeling to have been a horrible friend, the feeling of shame, and the guilt to not have saved him....it would have destroyed him.

He recovered from not have been able to save Akane and has Inupi to be here and to patiently wait him to get over his obessession but surely he wouldn't have recovered to have lost Inupi because nobody would have been here for him.

Maybe Akane would have tried to help but maybe Koko would have distanced himself from her because she looks too much like Inupi.

I agree with you @naehja

I understand that for anime-only people it may be difficult to understand immediately Koko and Inupi's backstory, there's a lot of new info, a lot of trauma and guilt involved, I understand it can be overwhelming and even readers had to re-read the whole story, analyzing the situation because, while I believe Wakui wanted Koko and Inupi story to be treated as a romantic one, (because the way he writes them and the tropes he uses for them, are strongly romantic-coded), I understand there are many levels of reading in their whole story and that

1)maybe Wakui wanted us to read it as romantic but decided to leave things a little ambiguous, just because, or

2)or what we saw in the manga is the best he could do, given the industry isn't the most queer-friendly around;

3)or he purposely decided to let readers free to have their own interpretation, romantic or not

but ultimately, if even now, when the story ended a year ago and we have plenty of confirmations regarding Koko andd Inupi's feelings for each other, manga readers still insists that Koko was an insensitive asshole that used Inupi "because he looks like his sister", then I fear we have a problem.

But this person you talked with is an anime-only, they still don't know how their last meeting before Bonten arc goes, etc etc, so I can understand if they are confused.

The problem is that many times people forget that, trauma or not, kissing your male friend when you're a boy yourself and you're perfectly aware of you you are kissing and what you are doing, isn't a very super-straight thing to do, especially when the writer made Akane (that in-universe represents both Koko's guilt and conscience) said to Koko "kiss only the person you like".

I understand many people (*cough*homophobic dudebros, generally*cough) prefer to see boy killing and do the worse thing to each other, but boys liking boys do indeed exist.

As us kokonui shippers always said, and as it was recently confirmed once again in the exhibition by Wakui in the extra chapter, Koko's crush on Akane was just that, an innocent crush that naturally faded; it became a major trauma only because Akane died an Koko felt guilty he couldn't protect her: at that point it wasn't even bc he had a crush at that time, it was because he felt he failed her, a nice, gentle girl, a person he cared about and that didn't deserve that terrible fate.

We know that in the end, with time and Inupi's help, Koko gets over -or at least, start to understand he can live without- his trauma and choses to be with Inupi as he always wanted, but without guilt.

In the end, if Akane survived and Inupi died, there would have been no one as close as Inupi has always been to Koko to help him, as you said.

Akane probably only knew Koko as Seishu's friend, otherwise they'd had no reason to interact, and Koko would have felt even guiltier for not thinking immediately to his friend; of course he'd be happy Akane is safe, but he would hate himself even more for not saving Seishu. I fear he would have kept making money but this time there would have been no one around trying to make him reason and make him realize he could live a life without his guilt, because, as we said, I doubt Akane and Koko would have any reason to interact without Seishu and in time, as we saw, Koko's crush was meant to fade anyway.

#tokyo revengers #kokonoi hajime #inui seishu #kokonui #inukoko #akane inui #asks #tokyorev anime spoilers #zae talks about tr

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khaire-traveler · 2 months

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I’ve been feeling very burnt out lately and have been distant from deity worship for a while. I don’t have the most accessible situation (small altar, can’t burn candles, ect). I can’t seem to start back up again, but I feel really guilty about it. Do you have any tips or suggestions to help?

Hey, Nonny, I'm sorry you've been feeling so burnt out. I hope this feeling passes for you soon. 🫂

My most important advice is to be gentle with yourself and go at your own pace. If you aren't feeling energized enough to engage with worship at all right now, then that's actually ok. I don't speak for the gods, but I think they'd want you to take care of yourself first and foremost, and pushing yourself far past your limits is definitely not going to help with your burnout. It's easy to feel remorseful for not being able to give your deities your best right now, but you can't give your best 100% of the time; sometimes you need to rest, and that's entirely normal and even expected. If it helps, maybe you can dedicate resting as a devotional act to a deity; self-care is always a good offering to give. I've found that dedicating self-care as an offering has also motivated me more to engage with it, but over time, try to focus on slowly shifting self-care for the benefit of someone else to doing it for the benefit of yourself.

So, yeah, my best advice is to allow yourself to rest. If you force worship when you barely have the energy to do anything else, your worship may begin to feel more like an obligation than something you're doing because you want to. Give yourself time to recover. If you find yourself struggling, it's ok to ask your deities for help, even if you're unable to give them an offering in return. Deities tend to be more understanding than the wider internet makes them out to be. Always prioritize your own well-being. Your practice isn't going anywhere.

I do have some links to other posts that may help, too, so I'll give them to you, in case they're helpful to you. There aren't any posts I could find that specifically relate to your situation, but some of these posts discuss similar situations or potential solutions. This one here is about general "deity disconnect". This one is about some ways you can bond with your deities. This is one about falling out of practice; it's just a general tip, but maybe it can be of some help to hear. Those are the only posts I could find that may help, so if you choose to check them out, I hope they're helpful to you. <3

I hope this advice was helpful for you. Please take good care of yourself, Nonny, and have a good day/night. <3

#anon asks #answered asks

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rainsandrains · 7 months

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in all honesty, i'm having a hard time with my atheopaganism. it's nearly hallows, and my focus is still set up for spring - i was here (in cambridge) until july, then i went home (to my parents' house) until the start of october, and although i've been back for about two weeks i still haven't touched my focus except to put my two spiritual notebooks back on it. i have hardly engaged with any of the things i consider spiritual practices.

the last time i was in cambridge, i was extremely unhappy. i was still in limbo regarding issues with my phd, i was having issues with my relationship to certain close friends, and i was, to put it bluntly, bordering on suicidal. i then went through hell for two weeks in july, and spent all of august recovering from that. i finally got good news about my phd and in september i started studying again, and i managed to make a tiny bit of progress with another personal goal i won't talk about here in case it's triggering to people. i engaged in my first proper full moon ritual, and managed to keep the promise i made to myself that night - a certain set of tasks for an entire lunar cycle. things were looking up. and then i came back to cambridge, to the place where so much went wrong and where i had felt so so bad, and it all fell apart again. i relapsed into a very bad coping mechanism and haven't yet had the energy to feel bad about it. i'm struggling to enjoy my main hobby because the choir is full of new people and because i'm tired and drained.

so no wonder the whole "connecting to the natural world" thing has fallen away. i'm just trying to get through the days, get my work done, and not snap at the poor freshers who haven't done anything wrong. i don't feel guilty about abandoning my practice. but i do feel like i'm lacking something. i do feel sad, and regretful, that i'm not feeling connected to the world.

and, for some reason, when i feel this way (and when i feel low and lonely in general), i've recently (as in over the last year or so) found myself drawn to polytheism. i know that gods aren't real. but i wish they were. i find myself... playing pretend, for lack of a better word. talking to apollo and lighting a candle i imagine he'd like, and then catching myself and feeling stupid. when i have to sing christian music with my choir, i think "khaire apollon, if you want to take any of this music as an offering, even though it's about the wrong god on paper, feel free. your presence would be appreciated" - because i feel so isolated even in that space, and because i need something overtly pagan to counteract the icky feeling christianity gives me. i know plenty of naturalistic pagans engage with deity as myth, as story, as metaphor... but i want it to be more than metaphor. but it isn't, and it never will be. i need to find a new way to engage with these ideas, something that fills the emotional void but that aligns with my naturalist worldview. i never think about apollo this way when i'm at my parents' house, probably because i'm less lonely than here where i live alone. maybe i need to spend more time with my friends, but it's cambridge, they're so busy all the time...

i don't know. i may well delete this post - i've never rambled so personally on this blog before, and it's not really in line with my original intention that this would be for reference and inspiration. but i'm stuck, and frustrated, and struggling, and i don't have anyone irl i can talk to about it because i don't know any other naturalistic pagans irl. only a couple of people even know i'm pagan, and while both are open-minded and kind about it neither of them are remotely similar (one is my college chaplain, and the other is a friend who is jewish - both lovely, neither likely to be on the same page as me about naturalism).

#atheopaganism #suicide tw #e.txt

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tiffanylamps · 1 year

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🔥🔥🔥🔥 of course, some beyond evil hot takes 🔥🔥🔥🔥 but also, what is some controversial opinion that you have about something entirely mundane :^0

ask me ask me ask me baby (Disclaimer: I started writing this, then had dinner, watched an episode of Bros on Foot, then had a shower and now I'm pretty exhausted (thanks rona + bad health). So my answers may seem a lil disorganised... they most likely are) Oh, gosh. I don't think I have that many opinions that are actually controversial when discussing be. But I shall still give it a go. I going to put a break here 'cause I really didn't know when to shut up. Also, sorry Iva but I feel like my answers are things we've already spoken about. So, I don't think any of this is new information to you 😩 TL;DR: Dong Sik and Joo Won shouldn't be represented by one aspect of their character. They're more complicated than that. (Including a mundane opinion at the end) (please excuse any weird funny business in this post (writing, grammar, spelling, clarity), we're trying our best here at Lamps HQ)

i. We as a fandom baby Dong Sik too much. I love Dong Sik. I adore him. He has seen and experienced far too many traumas, and I want nothing but good things for him in his future. What happened to him and his family when he was 20 was a tragedy that could have been avoided if the system (which should be in place to aid victims) wasn't systemically corrupt. He was beaten by police officers whilst in custody. He was framed and belittled, degraded, and humiliated. (the trauma he experienced is so layered and would take a lifetime for him to unpack and get closure from).

It almost completely ruined his life and future prospects, and it would have been done if Nam Sang Bae hadn't come in with his lvl 100 guilt and tried to make up for his actions. Dong Sik tried to make the best out of the awful circumstances that befell him and I sincerely admire him. Not everyone is as kind and loving as Dong Sik.... But but but... Buuuuut that doesn't absolve him of his actions. He murdered someone with his bare hands and allowed the system that was once put against him to be used in his favour.

Police officers shouldn't be murdering civilians. full stop. Yes, he was emotionally compromised- technically it could be seen as self-defence, but an unconvicted man, a suspect, was murdered and Dong Sik didn't face repercussions. Nam Sang Bae skewed the evidence so Dong Sik didn't get into trouble. Dong Sik took a year (?) off work after that event and to "help" him recover, Sang Bae got Dong Sik transferred to his substation (which Sang Bae had been demoted to as a result of one of his rookies dying on the job. Although, it wasn't deemed much of a punishment considering he was so close to retiring anyway). All the while, Dong Sik feels justified for his actions (as he did when he moved Min Jeong's fingers). (Screenshots from the translated script book/author's notes doc)

I think it's best that when discussing and exploring Dong Sik's character, we remember that he is a man capable of murder. He is a murderer. (Do I blame him for what he did? No, not really. I can see why he did it. Objectively, I fucking love it for the narrative lol). But yeah, he isn't a guiltless sweet baby angel who never did anything wrong in his life. (DISCLAIMER: obviously jokes are just jokes. I love them and I never want them to stop. I am super guilty of participating in this line of joking and I'm not about to stop any time soon. But when discussing DS in serious conversations, we shouldn't erase his history. By doing that, we are devoiding him of agency and retribution (which is one of the main arcs/themes of his character development)).

ii. Joo Won is autistic and people need to stop calling him stupid. I will die on this hill, I don't care. I fully encourage everyone to bully Joo Won, because, well, he fucking deserves it. I know that bullying him is a hilarious love language the fandom has developed and I fully participate in this pastime. I honestly love it. Yes, he has done a lot wrong and shouldn't be absolved of his sins (that being said, we should allow him the space to learn and grow. We should learn to forgive whilst still keeping him and ourselves in check). But where I draw the line is when people outright laugh at his characteristics/actions which are derived from the fact that Joo Won is coded as autistic.

I know not everyone is going to be particularly versed in neurodivergent symptoms and that is completely fine. I even didn't fully clock Joo Won being autistic the first time I watched the show- I "labelled" his actions as a result of one) his obscenely privileged upbringing and two) the fact that he (imo) has some degree of OCD (which is a type of anxiety disorder). Then it hit me one day that he is soooo autistic. A few examples (I'm too ill to list each one or go into full detail): 1- People say that he's a bad detective. Which, ugh. 2- That he should have seen the "obvious" signs that Dong Sik wasn't the killer earlier. This sentiment completely ignores the timeline of the show and the fact that the viewer is provided information that Joo Won doesn't have access to. And it also removes Dong Sik's accountability for being purposely obtuse and antagonistic. 3- the whole (very minor) narrative that joo won is lame because he has terrible people skills (or something along those lines, I can't quite remember the tags I read as it was a while ago). This one, in particular, ties in with Joo Won's autism coding. With a (relatively sound) understanding of what autism looks like in male adults, to me, it would seem that a lot of what Joo Won does (speaking bluntly, getting easily confused when provided a lot of information during an intense situation, overwhelm, struggling to gauge people's emotions/tone, being very black and white, hyper focussing on a topic of interest, struggling to adapt to new social environments, masking, issues with food and sensory stimulation, etc) can be credited to autism. Perhaps I'm connecting dots that don't exist and am projecting an ideal onto his character, but as someone who grew up with multiple friends and family members who are neurodiverse (and is neurodiverse myself), I can see so many similarities between Joo Won's actions, thought processes, and mannerisms to that of a person with autism.

^ (credit) here is an overview of some characteristics of autism in adults (obviously, it's a complex topic which differs from person to person. But I can definitely connect many of these examples to joo won's character and actions). [I feel like I could say a lot more about this subject, but it would be distracting away from the original point. I have thoughts on Joo Won masking and how he struggles to mask around Dong Sik]

How does this relate to Joo Won being "stupid"? One may ask. I will try to explain it as best I can (even though I don't fully have my answer planned out). Labelling Joo Won as stupid, as a stuck-up nepo baby who did nothing for the storyline, or just a useless dolt that needed Dong Sik to spoon-feed him, completely misconstrues the source material. Joo Won is intelligent, hard-working, determined, stubborn, foolish, annoying, pompous, proud, narrow-minded, snobby, short-sighted, dedicated, loyal, loving, persistent, and perceptible to change (and even more than that). We wouldn't have a story if Joo Won was stupid. We wouldn't have a conclusion if Joo Won was stupid. Downplaying Joo Won's intelligence and chalking up his characteristics as something that makes him less-than does a complete disservice to his character as well as his importance within the story. Beyond Evil is a story with TWO leads. It's not the Dong Sik show. I can NEVER subscribe to the act of bringing one character down in order to hold another up. Dong Sik is not this all-seeing, all-knowing, flawless character. If he was, he would have never been framed for murder, he wouldn't have been stuck for 20 years, and he wouldn't have needed help in uncovering the truth. He needed Joo Won (and Ji Hwa, Jae Yi, Jung Je, Ji Hoon, Du Soo, Sang Bae, etc). Without Joo Won, he may have never found out the full truth of what happened to his sister (as how many people in his life had a part to play in the traumas he faced). So, I think it's about time that people start to recognise Joo Won as a neurodivergent character (and stop giving him a hard time for not seeing signs that WE were given), as well as stop downplaying him. Kim Soo Jin, Sim Na Yeon, and Yeo Jin Goo created such a multi-dimensional, complex, flawed character with good and bad qualities, it does a disservice to their creativity and hard work when one belittles Joo Won down to one descriptor. Dong Sik and Joo Won aren't just the idiot and the downtrodden. They're more than that and fan interpretation shouldn't rewrite the facts of the show.

Anyway... there's a point in there somewhere... I think... I have no idea if I managed to construct a reply that makes sense. I don't think I fully relayed all my thoughts on this particular matter, but we live. tbh, I feel very icky when an autistic character gets labelled as stupid or useless. It gets on my nerves and if it wasn't obvious, I am pretty protective of Joo Won (maybe I shouldn't be, but... well... here we are!). Also, as a note: I don't expect anyone to agree with my opinion that Joo Won is autistic. But yeah, I was going to include more "controversial" opinions for be, but I have already said way too much. This post reads like a rant - which it probably is - and I don't want it to ruffle anyone's feathers. It's not an attack, it's just my opinion.

As for the mundane opinion: iii. kiwis are the scum of the fruit world. They're nasty and a lot of effort to eat (considering they don't taste great), and their texture is gross. But I do think their furry shell is pretty neat, even if it makes my skin cruel. (idk why this was the first thing that came to mind lol)

(sorry Iva. Maybe one day I will learn how to give short answers😂🫣)

#ask answered #ask game #chatty lamps #thank you <3 #beyond evil #i'm ill and yet I manage to write this beast of a post. this is what this show has done to me. i just can't help myself 😂#i do have more opinions for be that are less intense and a lot more fun but... i guess i wanted to have a bitch and moan #as a pre-emptive warning:#rn i will not be taking constructive criticisms. maybe in the future. but right now??? I'm trying not to be miserable #soooo if anyone thinks i suck for what i wrote then... 🤷‍♀️ idk... maybe keep it to yourself

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k0kichiimagines · 1 year

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GE!saeran w a suicidal partner...except the signs are subtle? like before he started recovering mc would make jokes like "i feel im gonna kms," "i feel like jumping off.." yada yada??

hurt/comfort

of course <3 i hope you're having a good day nonnie

[GE] saeran x reader

[we're not out of the tunnel yet]

TW : this work surrounds suicide and suicidal thoughts

i didn't put a community label on it because im still unsure what topics to use them for but pls lmk if you think i should !!

"I'm going to kill myself~" You hummed softly to yourself, in the similar way to how you'd sing your favourite songs while cleaning or working. The object in your hands simply wasn't cooperating, and while perhaps the average person would only get slightly irritated at such an ordeal, when everything in your mind is a constant wreck even the smallest thing going wrong is enough to make you hate yourself. You weren't going to cry, you'd feel too silly to shed tears over something like this, but you certainly were not happy, forcing a smile as you continued your self written song.

You'd assumed Saeran was elsewhere, he'd been typing away on his laptop the last you'd seen him, still overworking himself non stop to find out where the hell Saeyoung was. You'd made such jokes and songs often, but usually when you'd presumed him to be out of earshot, or quickly brushed them off when he'd frowned slightly and told you not to say that.

Only a week prior had seen you both in that little cabin in the woods, if you removed the situation surrounding you both it had been a nice place, you'd made a note to suggest visiting something similar one day in the future. Future. It was strange, you weren't one to plan for the future, or maybe you were one to desperately give yourself things for the future, things to reach to keep you going. Either way, you'd never planned in this way before. It was nice.

You wished to confine in him about the state of your mind, but you could write down a thousand and one reasons as to why you wouldn't dare. He's suffering himself, you'd feel like a burden, you'd only worry him, it wasn't too bad, you could push through it and ignore it. But that doesn't stop you sometimes, just for a single second, imagining his arms around you, his soft voice. It's a fantasy to think sweet words and honest kisses would cure you, to think him promising you it would be okay would fix you, would clean you up. But knowing that doesn't stop you dreaming it. Doesn't stop you selfishly wanting him to carry you in his arms and erase all the agony in your mind. But he would make it easier to bare, wouldn't he? No use for such thoughts. Don't be silly. Think of him. Think of how you'd stress him.

"Ugh, come on, this is my thirteen reason just work already-!" You were cut off by your adoring lover carefully taking the item from you and fixing the situation quickly, you jumped slightly in surprise and felt guilt yourself in way he seemed worried and guilty at your reaction. "I thought you were still in the sitting room." You reassured him, moving closer. You weren't afraid of him, that was in the past.

But he didn't return your smile, hesitating when he returned the item to you. "My love…" he paused, clearly being incredibly careful in choosing his next words. "Those jokes you make…"

"Saeran." You place the box aside, and quickly cup his face. He stares at you, nothing but love and concern for you. You stammer - how can you look him in the face and lie to him? You can lie to the whole world, but never him. "Don't worry about me." He frowns at your words, but you speak again quickly, too quickly. "Please, it's okay, I'm okay. If they make you uncomfortable I'll stop saying them. I kind of say it without thinking but I'll-"

"You say them without thinking?"

You freeze slightly. He's sharp, he'd work out the underlying meaning you hadn't intended. "N-not like that, but…" Your mind is blank, struggling to find an excuse that isn't a full out lie but isn't the complete truth either. "Uhm…".

An uncomfortable silence falls. In all the time you've known him, you've never felt this awkward and scared around him.

"Why don't you want to tell me?" His voice is quiet. He's barely started recovering, he has a million fears running around his mind, but he won't say a word of them.

"I don't want you to worry about me."

"Why not?"

"Because I'll feel bad." You confess. "If you stress about me and have to constantly pick me up… it'll be exhausting for you. I don't want to put that weight on you."

He closes his eyes and takes a breath. You expected him to be hurt, maybe annoyed - but he just looks sad. He looks sad. Sad for you.

You've made him upset.

"I'm sorr-"

"Don't you dare apologise." his words are sharp, but his voice is tender as always. "Don't you dare, never apologise." He pulls you into an embrace, arms tightly holding you. You relax, relax because he's holding your weight, he's got you safe. "It breaks my heart to think of you suffering, and it breaks it even more to think of you carrying it alone. My love, my life, your pain won't wear me down. I wish I could take it away, I wish you never had to shed a tear again, but I can't." He sits, you still in his embrace and now being pulled down with him. He cradles your body, positioning you to look at his face, eyes damp. "The idea of losing you…" He takes another breath. "I don't want to imagine it. I won't let you do that. If you'll let me, I'll do my best to support you, to care for you, I promised you and myself that I'd always love you."

"Saeran...I'm afraid."

"Of what?" although, perhaps he already knows. He just wants you to vocalise it, to use your voice rather then have him assume.

"Of getting better. It seems silly… but… it's so terrifying. The idea of having to change, to put the work in."

"It's not silly. I was paralyzed with fear when I was changing, I turned my fear to rage and took it out on you… but in the end I did it. It's not easy, every day is a struggle, I'm not aiming to 'be better', I'm just learning to live with it. For myself. I could do it because I knew… I know you're there to support me. So… don't do it alone. You're the only one who can change yourself, but that doesn't mean you should suffer alone." He holds out his pinkie finger to you. You stare at him questioningly. "We're both suffering. Let's make a promise, a promise to pick the other up, a promise to try, a promise to never…" He struggles to find the right wording that isn't blunt.

You latch your finger over his. "A promise to never give up. On ourselves and on each other." He brings your hands up to his lips and seals it with a kiss.

"To never give up." He moves to kiss your forehead. "You've made it this far. I'm proud of you for every day you made, and for all the ones I know you're strong enough to survive. My love."

#saeran x reader #ge saeran x reader #🍓... saeran #mystic messenger x reader #tw suicidal thoughts #tw suicide #saeran #msyme x reader

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