Vent post, sorry; I try to avoid posting such things on my main, but I just need someone to talk to, so I'm talking to the void that is the Internet.

I'm still really going through it. Even though some of the moving problems have somewhat diminished, it feels like I just keep running into bad luck. I've been trying to look on the bright side of things, but for some reason, I can't seem to. None of my usual coping skills are working. I don't have a therapist yet, since my old therapist that I had for close to four years couldn't treat me in this new state, and I also don't have any medical insurance, so I can't get a new therapist without that (out of pocket is $150 a session). I feel exhausted constantly, I'm extremely irritable, and I feel generally unhappy. I know moving is a big stress, and this is my first ever time moving at all; not only was our moving process extremely rushed, but it's not like it was a new city - it was halfway across the US, from the West/Mid-west to the East Coast. I don't think my body or mind are adjusting well, and I know absolutely no one here who can support me. It's only been a few days, but all my efforts to meet new people have not worked thus far, unfortunately. Everyone has been rude and unresponsive. A lot of people have given me dirty looks. I can't help but feel it's related to my gender identity, especially since there is a house with a Trump flag (didn't know those existed???) just a block away in my neighborhood. I'm not really liking this place. I honestly don't enjoy it here, and it's ten thousand light-years away from every major city, even the major ones in the state. Honestly, I kind of hate this move, and truthfully, I didn't want to move anyway. :/

I don't feel welcome here. Even the house gives me this strange feeling of "I don't want you here". I can't unpack any of my altars or protective wards because the movers broke my dresser, so we have to wait four weeks for the new one before I can even unpack most of my room. I'm frustrated and stressed and anxious. I'm supposed to attend college this Fall, but I have yet to even visit the place I'm attending yet. And weirdly, it has no clubs or organizations on their website. I asked about that, since I found it odd, and they confirmed that they have no clubs or special activities. How the fuck am I supposed to get to know people? Also, naturally, the only places nearby that are hiring are all shitty retail jobs. I absolutely hate retail, due to trauma, but I can't find any delivery jobs or even ma & pa shops that are hiring. I've spoken to the owners directly in-person and get told they're not hiring. Where am I meant to work during college? What am I meant to do? I don't know this area at all, and that honestly upsets me because I don't know anything about it - the places to work, the local culture, the area's views on LGBT, how to converse with people here, etc. I don't know anything, and I know it's supposed to take time to get to know all that stuff, but I don't want to wait. I didn't even want to come here in the first place, but now I have no choice but to learn everything all over again in a place I don't even want to be. It'd be different if I actively chose to live here, but I did not. It was a decision that was forced on me.

So many people tried to reassure me, some with just a dismissive "it'll be fine" and some by accusing me of being a "drama king". Moving is statistically one of the most stressful life changes for most people. And honestly, I feel like all those reassurances have now been wasted because I'm here, and it's awful. I'm here, and I don't like it. I'm here, and everything keeps seeming to go wrong. Was this even "for the best"? Was it?

Gods, I don't know. I'm just so upset about this and the fact that I don't have any support, for the most part, because even my online friends are dealing with stuff (finals time in college and such). I feel alone and isolated. I don't really know what to do or how to feel. I'm just exhausted.

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I was showing the song to my mom 🤦

Tagging: No tags, just do it if you want c:

thank you @rose-margaritas for the tag!

Instructions: This picrew + the last song you listened to

Tagging @chickiefoo, @differenceenginegirl, @hyperfixatra, @obliobla

I love seeing people’s passion for their deities

I love seeing people’s eyes light up when their deities come up in conversation

I LOVE SEEING PEOPLE LOVING THEIR DEITIES 💞

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happy lesbian visibility week btw(!!!)

Wawawawa, drew Apollon instead of doing my school work (It do be like that dkjasfds.) Also, drawing Apollon in a somewhat more modern time is fun! :^)))) (Idk, man... Idk)

✧ A Mothers Revenge ✧

A kestrel seeks revenge on a European Starling after it kills and eats her chicks. In the U.S, European starlings have a devastating impact on our native ecosystems in the entire United States. This species is known for their aggression towards other cavity nesting birds, outcompeting native species for nesting spots and food sources. They’ve been known to kill many native species from bluebirds, to woodpeckers, to kestrels. They are violent towards competing species, destroying their nests, and pecking holes in eggs laid by other birds. Not to mention, they also destroy crops and devour multitudes of grain each year.

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I wanted to portray something intense to kind of grab people’s attention to this problem. Most people don’t know how horribly invasive they are. While they’re pretty birds, they’re not meant to live in the United States. I wanted to use colors like red (to represent anger, sadness, revenge, betrayal) to portray what native species have to endure every year towards a bird that was never supposed to even come in contact with them. And colors like yellow (to represent wrongfully perceived innocence and guilt).

The spills of blood can be represented as the successful revenge the kestrel has, or, the multitudes of blood spilled from native species by European Starlings.

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Did you know? All the European Starlings in North America descended from 100 birds set loose in New York’s Central Park in the early 1890s. The birds were intentionally released by a group who wanted America to have all the birds that Shakespeare ever mentioned. It took several tries, but eventually the population took off. Today, more than 200 million European Starlings range from Alaska to Mexico.

I've officially set up a Ko-fi! There's no pressure to donate; it's simply an option if you wish to. c:

I appreciate your addition!

Does it greatly affect the success of a spell if you don't exactly believe or if you doubt it will work? And if so, how do you fix this? I thank you greatly for being so kind and informative in all your posts,,, you're a brilliant person and I'm glad you exist in this universe 🤍

Hey, Nonny, thank you kindly for the compliments! That was very sweet of you to say. c:

I'm not exactly sure. 🤔 It's been awhile since I've been able to cast anything, and unfortunately, my notes are packed away atm. I would suggest asking this question to @jasper-pagan-witch , @windvexer , or @stagkingswife (unsure if Stag would know, but I've seen her post about witchcraft before!). Hopefully, one of these lovely people can be of more assistance to you. c:

Take care, Nonny, and my apologies for not having an answer! Have a good day/night. 🧡

How do i boop u 🤔

Like this

Hey. Do you maybe have some books you'd recommend? And how did you learn?

Hey, Nonny!

For books, most modern ones I am in the process of reading or I have in my "to read" list. Hellenic Polytheism: Household Worship by Labrys is one that I've mentioned a few times now. I'm still in the process of getting through it, but it's interesting so far! For another modern book, I've been told Greek Religion by Walter Burkert is good, but it's still on my "to read" list. I've also been told Hellenismos by Tony Mierzwicki is good for beginners, but apparently isn't the best if you're already pretty acquainted with Greek polytheism. It's something that is also on my "to read" list, though I'm not too interested in it after hearing it's not as good to read as an experienced practitioner. A modern book I'm really excited to start reading is Worshipping Olympus by Hester Butler! I haven't seen many people talk about it, but it's a book with various modern hymns to the Greek pantheon. I hope I can check it out soon!

Regarding ancient sources (which I love reading the most), here's what I've got. If you're interested in magic, I suggest reading the Greek Magical Papyri which has a ton of useful knowledge regarding ancient Greek magic. The ancient books I've enjoyed the most so far have been The Iliad (Homer), The Odyssey (Homer), Theogony (Hesiod), The Library of Greek Mythology (Apollodorus), and The Bacchae (Euripedes). I tend to enjoy reading ancient plays, too, although I suppose they don't technically count as books, I guess. Also, I haven't read it, but I've been told Works And Days (Hesiod) has some good devotional pieces included in it; I'm not entirely sure how accurate that is, however. Not books, but I also really enjoyed reading the Homeric and Orphic hymns to the gods! The Orphic hymns are my favorite due to their poetic phrasing.

As for how I got my education, it's mostly from four years of experience and research. I do quite a lot of research (lots done in the beginning of my practice but still doing so today) and have read many historically educational articles. I'm friends with quite a few classics and history majors as well which definitely helped lol. I mostly focused on the historical side of things (ancient resources) first and foremost when gathering information, as I find it to be more trustworthy. I've learned that the best way to avoid misinformation tends to be looking into the original sources yourself, to the best of your ability. Doing so has saved me a lot of time and headaches. I'd recommend anyone to do the same.

I'm not sure if this is what you were looking for or interested in, but I hope this helps! I know more about historical books and sources than modern ones, so I'd recommend asking @teawiththegods , who has read and discussed many modern books, if that's more your style. Hope you enjoy my recommendations anyway. c: Have a good day/night! 🧡

It's ok to not forgive someone for how they hurt you, even if they apologize. You are not obligated to forgive anyone. You are valid in your decision not to.

Hey, so, I think I might be a lesbian, are there any deities associated with this kind of thing in any sort of way? I’ve heard some say Artemis but others say that thats interpretation and not necessarily true, and some say Aphrodite because she’d related to sexuality, some say Dionysus or Apollo because they’re related to queerness, etc.

Hey, Nonny!

All of the deities you mentioned make sense to me, actually. I've met many people who associate Artemis with lesbianism; I believe this may be a modern association, but I know there's evidence that it was heavily implied in ancient times. Aphrodite is a goddess of love and sexuality, so it makes sense that she would be able to help with discovering yourself. I've seen Dionysus be regarded as a god of queerness in modern times, actually, but even without that modern association, he is absolutely a wonderful god to help with embracing sexuality. Apollo is also often associated with queerness, and he could help as well; he's great with self-discovery. You may also consider Eros, who is a god of love and sexuality.

Truthfully, the Greek pantheon is pretty queer leaning in general. Many deities have been depicted in queer relationships within ancient myths, so it's not uncommon at all. I personally just suggest reaching out to whichever deity you feel the strongest pull towards. Who is the most appealing to? Who does your heart lean towards? Even if they don't have a specific domain in love, I think it's ultimately a better choice to go with the deity you feel the greatest connection to.

I hope this helped, and I wish you luck on your journey! Remember that being queer is a beautiful thing to be. Your sexuality and experience are valid. The feelings you have are entirely normal, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with them. Have a good day/night. 🧡

Hi, yes. Just wanted to pop in and say you’re amazing! You deserve the world, or at least your own domain.

If you were a deity, what would you be the deity of?

Thank you! I really appreciate the kind words. c:

Honestly, I've thought about this a lot since reading this question, and I'm genuinely unsure. 🤔 I'd like to think one of my strengths is my compassion, but I don't know if that fits me in this scenario. I think I'd really like to have a domain over animals! I love them a lot. Maybe psychology or something similar? I really enjoy that topic and have aspirations of becoming a licensed therapist. 🤞

Anyway, thank you for the interesting question! It was really fun to think about. I hope you're well, and take care. Have a good day/night! 🧡

Also I couldn't put messages on yo other acc but maybe for that one too? Like Norse offerings?

Hey, Nonny!

I'm unsure if you're the same person as the one I just answered or someone else, but I have no clue what you're referring to, I'm sorry. I currently have my asks turned off, but you're welcome to clarify in the comments or when they're back on. My apologies!

Have a good day/night! 🧡

I've asked too many questions but this is my last one, I think. Do you maybe have offerings for gods too? Bc I love devoting but OFFERINGS? like I don't know 😭😭

Hey, Nonny!

I'm sorry, but I don't entirely understand the question. Are you asking for general ideas for offerings? And for which pantheon or deities specifically? My answer would change depending on what you're looking for.

If you're looking for general offerings for Greek deities, you can usually give honey, wine, bread, cookies, pastries, milk, fruits, flowers, water (especially salt water), incense, olive oil, and herbs. You can draw their sacred animals, write poems dedicated to them, create a devotional playlist with songs that remind you of them, create a Pinterest board for them, collect objects associated with their sacred symbols, or just generally offer things that remind you of them. I encourage you to get creative with it!

I hope this answers the question you were asking, but I apologize if it doesn't. I currently have my asks off, so I can't get a response from you there, but you're welcome to comment on this post if you're comfortable revealing yourself as the anon (I can also delete your comments after I reply to it if you don't want people to know who you are for too long maybe???). Take care, and I wish you the best of luck in what sounds like a new journey. Have a good day/night. 🧡

Hi there! I was thinking of officially becoming a devotee of Apollo's, and I was wondering how to go about it? thanks so much, your blog is great :D

-@apolloshinesdown

Hey there!

Honestly, I didn't do anything fancy to devote to my deities. You're more than welcome to have a ritual to commemorate the occasion, maybe setting aside time to exalt Apollo and give praise. I don't personally believe you have to do anything special for it, but as I said, you're more than welcome to.

I suggest reaching out to Apollo directly before moving forward, maybe using divination. I think it's better to hear his thoughts on it first, just to get a good idea of where you both stand and to ensure you're both comfortable with it.

If you're planning to make an oath, however, that would change my answer quite a bit, but becoming a devotee doesn't necessarily require an oath.

I hope this was helpful, and take care! Have a good day/night. 🧡