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#but anyways that doesn’t matter bc they got back together and are clearly very much in love 🥰🥰
luciferthelesbian · 6 months
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Finished Invincible in a week, and I still don’t understand the hate the fandom has toward Amber. Other than… y’know, blatant racism.
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geonwooz · 3 months
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♡ JEALOUSY HEADCANONS — HONG WOOJIN + KIM GUNWOO
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bf!woojin + bf!gunwoo x reader | wc : 0.6k words | content : possible grammar and spelling mistakes, lowercase intended, domestic fluff, established relationship, mentions of jealousy, skinship | request : hello 👋 if it's not a bother for you can i pls request dating and jealousy headcanons for geonwoo and woojin? it's alright if you don't. thank you anyways ❤️❤️
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🐯 ok so this babygirl is a softie at heart and can get very jealous at time
🐯 his love language is physical touch, so you best bet he’s always got his hands on you in some manner whenever you are together
🐯 aka only an idiot would try to flirt with you bc you two are clearly a couple
🐯 woojin is also protective over you (honestly, that could also be his love language bc he is protective over his loved ones as well)
🐯 he’s not possessive, i’d say — just overly protective at times
🐯 so you best bet the second he sees a man approach you, he’s swimming mountains and climbing oceans to make sure he’s by your side with his hand on your waist
🐯 woojin has a ton of facial expressions too, so if he was ever jealous of smth you were doing, i doubt he’d be able to hide it
🐯 one look at his face and yk exactly what the man is going through
🐯 even tho he isn't exactly vocal about being jealous, you can tell as soon as you look at him and will make all the effort to assure him
🐯 if he's jealous bc you are socializing with other people, you'll immediately make him the topic of conversation so that he's included
🐯 plus, it's a discreet way to introduce him to everyone as your partner
🐯 that is if they hadn't already noticed his hand placement on your waist
🐯 he absolutely adores how you do little things like that to assure him and always tries to keep his jealousy at bay
🐯 but every once in a while, there'll be someone who is testing his limits
🐯 “the lion, the witch, and the audacity of that bitch! why tf was he still tryna flirt with you when i was right there?!”
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🐼 gunwoo is such a soft-spoken man
🐼 even if he’s jealous, he wouldn’t speak up on it
🐼 but also, it’s very rare that he gets jealous since he trusts you very much
🐼 and although he trusts you, that doesn’t mean he trusts other people
🐼 esp the men who are very much so trying to throw a line at you
🐼 he’s all for you being your own person and socializing (if that’s your thing) bc he wouldn’t want to hold you back for being your extroverted self just bc he’s an introvert
🐼 and being an introvert means being observant, which gunwoo definitely is
🐼 he’d let you mingle on your own but the second he sees you getting uncomfortable from unsolicited interaction with other men, he’s by your side in a heartbeat
🐼 no matter wherever you go in a room, gunwoo always has his eyes on you
🐼 so yk the second some man is trying to flirt with you, your boyfriend is gonna be by your side within the next minute
🐼 when it comes to jealousy, he isn’t really possessive bc he talks things out
🐼 if smth is bothering him and you don’t notice initially, he’ll give his feelings some time to marinate (just to see if he’s overreacting) before talking to you
🐼 he is very vocal with you regarding everything so the moment he feels like there’s smth that’s coming in the way of your relationship, he’ll speak out
🐼 knows very well that you are his safe space, and you won’t judge him for anything
🐼 honestly, don’t you just wanna put his man in your pocket ??? 😭
🐼 “jagiya, i’m sorry if i was being rude earlier. i guess i was feeling a little jealous.”
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bisluthq · 14 days
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Harry and Taylor clearly hooked up on and off for a very long time. There are whole songs about it by both of them. That’s not a love story for the ages, but denying what’s spelled out is just… weird.
You don’t have to be a Haylor or like them together to analyze the evidence and come to an objective conclusion. I don’t even like Harry and never have. I also don’t dislike him, I guess? He’s just there for me. I don’t think they fit together, I don’t find them particularly compelling as a couple. Context aside he’s probably one of the least interesting exes she has for me, right behind Conor Kennedy and Taylor Lautner.
But that doesn’t mean that if she says she thinks about jumping off a building to see if he shows up, I’m gonna act like “yeah I mean, I’m sure there were some feelings involved.” Like, you guys want to avoid being Haylors so much you end up being the other side of the same coin.
He wrote really devastating songs about her that he ended up not even releasing, probably because they were a bit much. None of us know the actual truth aside from Taylor and Harry, but my god, the woman said in an interview, when talking about Style, “it’s about that person that comes in and out of your life and you feel like the narrative is never truly over.” And there are pictures of them at the same party, dancing side by side, weeks before she got with Calvin.
Yeah, of course she dated Matty in the middle. Harry was literally dating some blonde model as well, that doesn’t mean they couldn’t hook up. Neither is a bastion of morality when it comes to this sort of thing and I doubt either of them were in committed relationships with those people anyway.
Why else would Calvin have such a visceral reaction to Harry? Cause idk if you guys remember but he used to block people with his face as their profile picture on sight. And when he and Taylor broke up, around the time of his tweeting rage about her, he followed Harry on instagram, who the hell knows what he wanted to accomplish. But it seemed like a pointed attack.
Harry legitimately wrote a sob song about Taylor dating Calvin a year into their relationship. You heard it, I’m sure, you talked about it.
“She dated Matty in 2023, so she couldn’t have hooked up with Harry in 2014/2015” is not a logical conclusion. Truth of the matter is that whatever she did with both or either of them was kept private and we’re all speculating, but there’s reason to believe one thing and absolutely nothing to back up the other.
As for Question, I fear you’re analyzing in too much detail with “I don’t think Harry is that confusing.” First of all, that’s not a reason to dismiss him as the muse lol. And second of all, she spells out how confusing he is in soooo many 1989 songs, an album written pre-first Maylor iteration.
Taylor is pretty straightforward with her Easter eggs and cross references. She interpolated a song that’s 100% about Harry, and then referenced lyrics from said song. And the song actually does fit Harry, and this thematic of “we always end up together” that she’d talked about in the past.
It’s possible it has Matty elements as well. I personally don’t see it, but I’m not gonna become a shooter against it bc I don’t actually care that much, but if she’s referencing Harry/his songs in it, then it’s most likely about him, and everything else is just cope from fans who don’t want it to be about him, for whatever reason.
And no, I don’t think Matty and Taylor were “super unserious and it was nothing hahahahaha” like some Swifties insist on saying, trying to erase the fact that she legitimately said “I love you” on stage. I just don’t think the first iteration of the relationship was that deep. There’s no indication that it was ever more than anything physical that happened a few times. I don’t think she was pining over Matty fucking Healy for 8+ years and close proximity while working on the album blah blah blah.
AT MOST Taylor and Matty hooked up for 2 months, given the timeline. Then it was Calvin, then Tom, then Joe, with basically no breaks in between, not really time for them to explore anything further.
With Harry they started something in the spring of 2012 and were on and off (most of the time off, of course) at least until fall 2014 with possibly one last encounter in early 2015. She admitted a bunch of stuff about Harry both in the OG 1989 and in the Vault tracks.
I also don’t think she was pining over him, or that she has feelings for him now, or that she wrote Question because of a 5 minute encounter at the Grammys.
I think Question was a result of seeing him in what looked like an adult serious relationship and also not feeling particularly good on her own. Wondering if things would be better if that person who she once thought would interrupt her wedding came sweeping in and saved her from how awful she felt in her current situation.
It’s not about Harry in particular. I don’t think she has delusions that they’d be compatible now. But it’s the most normal thing in the world to be sad about a partner and reminisce to good times with an ex. Obviously Calvin doesn’t elicit good feelings, Tom was a nothingburger, Matty even more so, at that point, I don’t even have to explain why her brain wouldn’t go to Conor, and who else is there? Joe Jonas? Married with a child. Jake and John? Who she knows had inappropriate relationships with her? Taylor Lautner? Also married.
It’s a process of elimination her brain probably did on her own. She explained what the songs were about quite well, and I tend to believe her and her very direct allusions and hints.
I think either extreme about Haylor is just fans wanting to bend reality to their perception, and I love you, but you always tended to minimize Haylor to a point that was almost like “they fucked a few times.” And then both of them had songs released/leaked that had you having to adjust your perception of them in real time. And I think, honestly, that you still have some leftover hesitance from then.
Admitting that they probably went on hooking up for quite a few years, even with long breaks in between, and that she allowed herself to think what if while having her heart shattered by who she thought was the love of her life does not mean you think they’re star crossed lovers and it was right person wrong time or whatever the fuck Haylors believe lmao
this is very well argued. I don’t necessarily agree but I am happy to respectfully disagree if that makes sense? I think you’ve made some excellent points. I genuinely do. The main reason I think Question is about Matty is because they’ve kinda said that? He had it on his pre show playlist and took it out when they started going on the fritz. He was also around when she was working on Midnights so while I agree she might’ve thought about other people and situations (including Harry) to me the song seems to pretty explicitly be about Matty and wondering if they could’ve worked out (which she then actively tried to do lol like shortly after). I think context wise it does seem like it’s about Matty? And she does rededicate songs regularly so I wouldn’t say something being “explicitly” about someone is necessarily proof it always will be. Love Story was explicitly about a specific guy but now it’s about her relationship with her fans yk? So I don’t think interpolations are proof of anything idk.
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redrobin-detective · 3 years
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Ok, I’ve tried and tried and tried to write this fic because I see it so clearly in my mind but it’s just not going no matter what I do. But I don’t want the idea to die with me. The closest this came to being written was exile which was an attempt to bleed out some of the energy of this au.
Anyway, so it starts off vaguely similar to canon only more aggressive. There had been underlying tension between ghosts and humans for a while, the dead jealous/angry at the living for disrespecting them. The successful creation of the Fenton ghost portal (and another halfa) was considered an act of war and so the ghosts responded in kind. So basically all of S1 occurs fairly close to canon except ghost attacks are more violent and have increasingly more consequences as time passes. Also the attacks aren’t just in Amity Park with ghosts becoming a worldwide issue but Amity is a focal point. Regular people know the ghosts hate them though they don’t know why. Phantom is very much a controversial figure as he is a ghost but also clearly is fighting off the more violent ghosts. 
One day, not long after the events of Control Freaks, Amity Park wakes up to find three of their own are gone. Danny Fenton, Sam Manson and Tucker Foley are nowhere to be found. There’s a massive manhunt, the parents go on TV and beg for information but they cannot be found. Curiously enough, town hero Phantom was also missing. There’s some evidence they left of their own volition so the Mansons and Foleys eventually relent that the kids fled on their own. The Fentons are 100% certain the kids were stolen/killed by ghosts as a statement. And the fact that Phantom went missing around the same time means he was the one who killed them. Jazz knows Danny was Phantom but had no idea what was going on and knew her parents wouldn’t listen she just, kept quiet and privately tried to piece together what happened. 
Three years pass and finally it looks like the Ecto War is coming to a close. Young, naive ghosts attempted to raise Pariah Dark in a bid to win. It went disastrously but Phantom (who was periodically spotted around the world, deep in the worst battles of the war) and group of loyal allies subdued the king. By the law of ghosts, Phantom was named heir apparent and he declared that the fighting would stop. Humans and ghosts would have to negotiate and co-exist in peace. But he’s not king yet, no he needs to be crowned at the place where it began, Amity Park’s Fenton portal (”where it all began” has a double meaning of the beginning of the war but also symbolically where Phantom began as Kings assume the crown where their living life ended to show their abandonment of their first life and the commitment to their second). Amity is NOT happy to hear that their former hero is coming home.
Amity has been through the wringer, ghost attacks got pretty bad. The Fenton’s throw themselves into their work to cancel out the grief, they create a group of ghost hunters nicknamed the Reds (for their red blood, ghosts are nicknamed Greens) to control the threat. Valerie heads the young adult division and is considered one of the best, she drops out of school to devote herself to it full time. Oh also her dad is now the Mayor as most have died or didn’t want the job. There are still people who like Phantom and see him as a hero (a lot of Casper Kids) but it’s generally an unpopular opinion in town. Maddie and Jack are ready to obliterate the ghost that took their son’s life the moment he’s within city limits. It’s a powder keg ready to blow. It all comes to a head when Phantom and his entourage arrive.
First off, Phantom looks very different, much less human looking than when he left. He’s clearly aged like a normal teen but his eyes look much, much older.  His skin is dead white with a blue tinge to it from his ice core and his aura is super cold. His hair is longer and is very misty that kind of swirls around him and his has fangs and claws. When he’s deep in battle or his obsession, his sclera turn black and he looks scary af. His entourage is ghosts who have sworn loyalty to him, who he picked up along the way after battling beside them for 3 years. Fright Knight, Skulker and Frostbite are recognizable allies. They are not happy that their future King is back in Amity (secretly fearing they’ll lose him once more to his human life). J&M have a shot and are going for the kill when they see something that shocks them; Sam and Tucker are in Phantom’s entourage.
There had been whispers that Phantom interacted with humans, that humans were in his inner circle but this is something else together. And so are Sam and Tucker. Sam is Phantom’s General, she is talented and collected and half feral. She used to be a pacifist but the trials of war and understanding that peace sometimes needs to be fought for made her compromise. She’s covered in scars and an extremely talented fighter. She’s missing her right hand up to her forearm, she can form a ‘phantom limb’ (basically borrowing ectoplasm from her future ghost) to do some things with some powers. Tucker is the support, he uses human and ghost tech to organize, weaponize and generally keep things running. He’s covered in homemade tech (shields and weapons and computers) and he rarely removes. Both he and Sam have kinda forgotten how to interact with and really BE human after so long among the dead. They had attempted to conceal themselves but they had forgotten how strong parental love and recognition is. J&M want to know about Danny, the teens don’t know how to respond but assure them he’s alive. Phantom can’t bring himself to look at them.
This is where I start to lose track of things but there will be parallels of Valerie/Maddie vs Sam as female warriors on opposite sides who are willing to go behind, possibly compromising the things important to them, for victory. Tucker will be contrasted against Jack/Jazz as the one making weapons but also generally keeping the human parts of the team mentally/physically afloat. *Severe* PTSD for all three of them. They’re also unnaturally codependent on each other, get super anxious when one of the trio is out of sight and sleep in a big cuddle pile. They will fucking Kill You if you look at one of them wrong. Vlad will be involved, he had been jailed for war crimes but convinced Walker to stage a coup to overthrow Danny and take the crown before he’s actually declared King and is too powerful. Vlad is more unhinged here, more ghost than human (a hint on what could happen to Danny if he’s not careful). He is eventually defeated but he sacrifices his life for ghost power which, in the end, is what makes him able to be beaten.
 There’s lots of ideas on what it means to be live or dead and where the divide really is, is it a heartbeat or it is how you choose to use your existence. On how duty shouldn’t mean you need to give up everything. Because Jack and Maddie believe that Phantom killed their son and, in a way, they’re right. Before they left, the ghost war had gotten so bad and the rumors of Dark being resurrected were going around. Amity attacks were at an all time high, people in their school were being killed just because Danny went there. He realized he had to choose between Fenton or Phantom and he chose to protect the world. He abandoned his human identity and went off to fight in war. Tried to convince Sam and Tucker to stay but they followed him through hell and back. Because Danny spends so much time as Phantom, Fenton is severely neglected. His long hair is cool and floaty as Phantom but is unkempt and stringy, hanging in his face as Fenton. He’s wan and underweight and looks like a walking corpse. He knows his human half will give out soon if he doesn’t give it more attention but he just can’t there’s too much to do, too many people to save.
It would end with Danny being outed to the town, not the world, just the town. Jack and Maddie need to recon with the fact that their boy DID leave of his own choice but only because their failure to protect him (from both the portal and ghosts) made him feel he had to take all this responsibility on his shoulders. Danny also has to recognize that he (and Sam/Tuck) can’t do all this on their own and they can trust and rely on the people around him. Phantom is crowned King but he decides Amity will be his base. The trio eat more, sleep some, catches up on school all the while continuing their duties as King and court. The ghosts also see that Phantom’s humanity isn’t a weakness but a strength and will bring peace to the Earth/Zone so they also take some of the burdens off his shoulder. 
Basically I load up heavily with angst at the beginning and end with all the love and comfort imaginable. I just can’t fucking figure out the middle and my motivation will not let me write this shit out. But I can’t let this AU die bc it fucking keeps me up at night.
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stargazer-balladeer · 4 years
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Jealousy [Genshin Impact]
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Characters Included: Kaeya Alberich, Diluc Ragnvindr, Venti & Razor
Notes: Heyo! I was inspired to do this while playing Genshin Impact. Sorry if some may seem OOC, especially Razor’s. Hope ya’ll enjoy this and have a lovely day. 
Reader’s Gender: Neutral
Warnings: None
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Kaeya Alberich
— I can see him as someone whose jealous not that often. Like he’s actually more amuse at the fact that someone is flirting with you when its obvious you’re dating the cryo-wielder knight.
— This guy is so chill (pun not intended) ngl. He leaves you be because he knows you can defend yourself from them. Though he will tease you afterwards.
— It just shows how much trusts he has in you. He loves to initiate affectionate things like hugging or kissing or picking you up bridal style. So pretty much everyone in Mondstadt knows you two are together by this.
— But if he sees that someone is clearly making you uncomfortable, its time for him to intervene. He will smoothly slide to your side, with a hand on your waist pressing you to his side, while smiling (or smirking) at the person. He will act his cheery self until that person takes a hint and go away.
— If you started hanging out with Diluc more often, he wouldn’t get jealous at all. In fact, he encourages you two to hang out. He loves the idea of his (adopted) brother and partner getting along. Though if you start hanging out with the pyro-weilder more often, Kaeya will surely drag you away to make you notice him. Leaving an bemused Diluc behind.
— Overall, Kaeya isn’t gonna be jealous, even if you tried.
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Diluc Ragnvindr
— I can see him being more of a jealous-type than Kaeya but not too much. Like he trusts you to not leave for another.
— If you start to hang out with opposite gender, Diluc would leave it be. He lets you have the freedom you want. But if he sees that you’ve been hanging out with them a bit too much, then he’ll get jealous.
— How is he when he’s jealous? He grumbles while glaring at the person from afar. You can also see a pout on his face as he stares (reads: glares) down at the person. This usually leads to someone (ie: Kaeya) to tease him, much to Diluc’s dismay.
— Diluc wouldn’t say anything about it, since we all know he’s not much of a talker. He usually do something to attract your attention to get his daily dose of affection from you (like tugging on the back of your shirt, twirling a strand of your hair, or just standing in front of you). But unlike before, when he’s jealous, he’s much more affectionate. Like he’ll initiate a hug or kiss (or maybe sex) with you. But expect him to be blushing while doing it.
— You can instantly know when he’s jealous. Please don’t tease him though lol
— He is not a person who easily meddle with other people, especially your’s, affairs. But when he sees that someone is clearly making you uncomfortable, he wouldn’t hesitate to stand in front of you and stare at the person. No matter who it is, they’ll take a hint and run away (well, except for people like Kaeya or Lisa).
— The person he’s jealous of is none other than Kaeya. He is instantly a bad mood when he sees his adopted brothed talking to his significant other. He likes the idea yes, but he prefers with distance and not THAT close! He would definitely push Kaeya back, pick you up and bring you somewhere (preferrably at his house) while leaving a laughing Kaeya.
— Overall, it’s easy to make him jealous.
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Venti
— He’s an easily-jealous guy, even though he’s a God 😐. Out of all the guys here, he’s the one whose easily jealous. (Let’s hope that this wouldn’t turn into a Yandere one 😐)
— Venti spends the last 500 years all by himself, so of course he wants your undivided attention. But he knows that its important in the human cycle to gain and lose people, so whenever you hang out with other people, he’ll pout and sulk but he understands.
— But he usually just join you and the person you’re hanging out with, it goes two ways. One, the other person being uncomfortable in Venti’s presence or, two, a trio hang out :)
— Venti is jealous of most people since he knows the sad truth that you’ll someday leave him to find another of your kin or die. Venti is scared of these possibilities. And that resulted in him being so insecure.
— He might comes off as clingy but please don’t leave him 🥺 He just doesn’t want you to leave him just yet.
— Believe it or not, he’s actually jealous of the Traveler, Aether (the male protagonist). For some reason, whenever he sees you two together, it sets a horrible feeling in his stomach. He hates it.
— Venti loves affection, just like Kaeya, but much more extreme. So expect him suddenly kissing you out of nowhere and hugging you unexpectedly. If you’re shorter than him, expect him to wrap his arms around your waist with his head on top of yours and sway you left and right. I can’t help but gush at how cute it all seems.
— Anyway, if he sees someone making you uncomfortable, he will appear next to you, smiling innocently, as he begans to talk with that person. I don’t think anyone would take him seriously so whoever that person is would ignore him. Venti would probably get annoyed at that, so you might need to drag him away before he could give that person a “piece of his mind”.
— If he sees you hanging out with Aether, he will definitely sulk or whine about it. If he sees someone else, let’s say Diluc, he would pout but wouldn’t whine. He grew to respect Master Diluc ever since the Dvalin’s incident. Besides, free drink :D
— Overall, he’s easily jealous and it wouldn’t be hard to make him jealous.
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Razor
— I recently got him and just got his mission (bc I just finished the Dvalin’s Prologue thing), so yeah. Sorry if he’s a bit OOC.
— He doesn’t understand the emotions very well, since you know, he was raised by wolves. But I feel like he’ll be easily jealous, he just doesn’t understand what that feeling is.
— So if you start to hanging out with other people, he would feel lonely and (actually) envious. He will pout but wouldn’t call your attention, instead, just watches you from the shadows.
— Razor can’t talk fluently and actually doesn’t like to talk since it’s hard for him. So he prefers just doing the action, albeit similar to Diluc in a way. Though you might need to teach him how to do some things about being a couple.
— He’s jealous of everyone, not even the same gender is out of his list. He’s jealous because of how fun you seem to be having with them than with him, and how you look so animated while talking.
— Razor’s an insecure wolf boi, so he might copy what other people are doing with you. Like intertwining your hands, hugging you from behind and other things. He might also start giving you things like meat, flowers, etc.
— You might need to reassure him that you wouldn’t leave him all because of his “unique” traits.
— If he sees someone making you uncomfortable, he would raise a brow while frowning, clearly not knowing what’s happening. Yet despite this, he decided to go near you and ask if you need help. The other person might mock him because of his “language” and appearance. This time, it’ll be him trying to drag you away.
— If he sees you hanging out with someone else, he would follow you and that person around. He’s actually quite sneaky when following you, with a few close-calls. Though you might catch on once you notice a strand of light blue hair sticking out of a rock.
— Please just ask him to join :)
— Overall, he’s a jealous-envious kind of person.
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[x] Main Page || [x] Mondstadt Page
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euphoricsunflowers · 3 years
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calling you daddy — monsta x
scenario: they ask about your kinks and you ask them to call you daddy
a/n: this is written with a fem reader in mind but is not strictly fem reader as no pronouns or anything is mentioned.
a/n: was this a request? nope tbh this was written for myself bc i’m sick and tired of seeing people call these men daddy so uh pls enjoy
word count: 2k
content: sub!monsta x, dom!reader, daddy kink obviously ajshdhs, minhyuk is kinda bratty? kinda??, lots of teasing and begging, mentions of consent and stuff
son hyunwoo/shownu:
he falls silent. he doesn’t know what to say in the slightest. he worries that he might hurt your feelings or say something out of line, but it just stuns him, “you don’t have to do it if you’re uncomfortable with that, bear. your consent is just as important,” you say.
but see that’s half of what’s stunning him. he’s not exactly uncomfortable with that. shownu’s nature is pleasing you, he doesn’t mind filling any role or position for you, this was just a little more intense than that.
“you know what? just forget we had this conversation. i don’t want you to feel pressured, and it’s not a big deal, okay?” you say.
but the idea lingers in his head whether or not you want it to. as the days go by, his mind wanders, and while it may not exactly be what he’d be into, he’s not against doing it for you.
as you manhandle him a little bit, he says it softly, “ah, daddy-,” it’s even more embarrassing than he imagined, and his cheeks and ears are flushed and hot, but when he says it, softly under his breath, just whispering it out to test the waters, he sees your shock and then your small little smirk.
“now that i know what it sounds like to hear you say that, and what that does to me,” you say, sneaking your hands under his shirt and letting them wander, playing with his chest a bit, “i don’t think it’s a good idea to say that if you wanna make it out of this bedroom spotless and in one piece.”
he blushes even more, a little shy and hesitant, but he likes having this kind of effect on you, so that may not be the last time he says it. besides, who says he cares if he makes it out in one piece? and spotless? his neck and chest and thighs were too clean anyway.
lee hoseok/wonho:
it was in the middle of you riding him, his wrists bound above his head with a rope that made his skin look so pretty against it. he’s already cum once, but you’re not stopping until you do, and he’s trying to keep himself together. your hands roughly playing with his chest is overstimulating and he’s overwhelmed. he pleads for mercy aimlessly, almost thoughtlessly.
but then, “if you’re gonna beg, call me daddy,” you murmur. he’s not even sure he hears you right when you say it. he looks at you with wide eyes, and he assumed he did because of the way you act. he knows he could stop you at any time because you’re very clear on consent and it’s not like this was completely out of left field considering how you’re already always in charge in the bedroom. he was just stunned.
and while he’s a little bit stunned, he also won’t deny that it is a little bit hot.
so he does, “please, daddy, it’s so much- i- i can’t handle it.”
he sees your smile, with just a drop of sadism behind the curl of your lip, “just a little more, baby, i’m close. you make daddy feel so good,” he gets so excited by the praise that he attempts to stick it out, forever still the man that just wants to make you happy and please you.
he forgets about himself and his own body for a moment when he feels your body tense up around him and you hold onto his chest as you orgasm, using him to get the most out of it before you slow down to a halt.
your heavy breathes and sweet nothings whispered in his ear are heavenly.
lee minhyuk:
“really? you’re into that? i honestly thought it would be the other way around.”
taken aback, you ask, “really? what gave you that impression?”
“idk, you don’t have this aura of dominance, so i didn’t really assume that was your thing.”
“is that- is that okay with you?”
he gets closer, teasing in the way he wants to make you shy, “you seem pretty bashful for someone who just asked to be called daddy in the bedroom.”
“minhyuk-,”
he rolls his eyes, obviously trying to get a rise out of you, “come on, i don’t even know if you have it in you.”
and something about his careless, taunting tone sets something off inside you, like he was challenging you. but it’s a challenge you take on when you approach him. your touch is softer, lighter than he imagined. he thought you would be lit aflame with a need to prove yourself to him. but you lean in to press a kiss on his neck and your wandering hands settle on his hips.
you’re gentle with him initially, yet he melts a little bit when one hand tightens and another begins to unbutton his shirt, giving your mouth access to his chest.
you push him onto the couch, straddling him and using a hand to hold both of his arms above his head, when you pull back, he looks dazed and needy, all those teasing smirks having faded off his features, “why are you so affected? i thought i didn’t even have it in me,” you say with a smirk this time.
he breathes heavily, “y/n- please-”
“oh please, that’s not my name anymore, min.”
yoo kihyun:
“you want me to what?!” his voice is randomly high pitched, loud, almost like he’s nervous or scared.
despite that anxious feeling you’re feeling too, you try to stay calm, “i understand if you’re uncomfortable by it, but you asked about my kinks, kihyun.”
“yeah i know- i just- i wasn’t expecting that- really? you’re not messing with me? that’s really what you want?” he looks exasperated.
“yes. i really want you to call me daddy.”
he goes silent, trying to comprehend in his head what the hell was going on and what he was going to do and why the more he thinks about it, the less vehemently against it he becomes. and he had spent the entire relationship making it clear that he cared about what you wanted (because he does) and it’s not like… he hates the idea of it, but it’s just so out there to him that he can’t even fathom or imagine it.
he asks for a few days just to think about it, and though the awkwardness lingers in the air, by the fourth day, it seems like you had mostly forgotten about it or at least it didn’t seem to be on your mind. he spends those days really thinking, trying to imagine what it would be like, why you would even want that.
but the next time you’re together alone, your hands and lips are on him and he experimentally says it, “daddy, please.”
the whiny, begging voice, coupled with the word, leave you stunned. you pull back with wide eyes, and he felt so embarrassed and shameful with your eyes on him like that, but then you pulled him back into you and kissed him with a certain kind of feverish desperation that made his knees weak.
chae hyungwon:
his reaction is oddly pretty calm. he asked about what you were into, and you told him. maybe he was expect something a little different, but to be honest, he knew you liked to be in control, and he usually just went along with it. he didn’t mind it especially because you always made sure you both felt good and that was all that matters. that and he kinda likes being told what to do.
so it doesn’t exactly surprise him, especially when you add, “but only in a sexual context! i don’t need you to say it all the time.”
“good because there’s no way in hell i’m calling you daddy in front of my friends,” he can see the thoughts behind your eyes wanting to take up that challenge, but he decides to ignore it, “as far as they’re concerned, i’m daddy.”
“sure, wonnie. sure,” you say dismissively, before looking back at him, “are you actually okay with it though? i know it’s… weird.”
“it wasn’t what i was expecting, but if that’s what you want, then i’ll do it.”
and as soon as you’ve got him under you, with kisses and marks trailing down his neck and chest, leaving him helplessly turned on and horny, he says it so naturally, you wonder if he even thought to do it. but whether or not he’s doing this solely for you, or because he might have found it a little hot, is between him and himself, “ahh, daddy, please- be gentle with me- i have a photoshoot in the morning- oh my god that feels so good please daddy don’t stop-”
lee jooheon:
he likes the idea of it when you mention it, he just gets kinda shy, “do you- do you really want me to call you that?”
you come closer, holding his hand and rubbing your thumb against it in a comforting manner, “yeah, i really like the idea of it. if you’re not completely against it, i’d be really happy if we could try it.”
“it’s not… the worst thing you could have told me you were into,” he laughs as your hand starts to massage his thigh instead, “we can try it. i'll tell you if we need to stop, but i think it’ll be okay.”
“good, i’m glad you’re reacting this way, honey,” you murmur as you kiss him, and he smiles, which, even if it makes the kiss a little awkward, is really cute, “sweetheart,” you whisper as you pull away, “can you say it? i just wanna hear you say it.”
your hands wander his skin nervously, he can tell you’re worried about him being uncomfortable, “ahh, d-daddy, please touch me more,” he whines, and he’s never been more compelling before, but somehow the use of that word really makes you want to give in and give him anything he wants, “please touch me.”
your hand falls a little lower upon his request, and he groans lightly, pulling you a little closer, “you’re perfect, baby, so pretty.”
“ahh, please,” he huffs, clearly growing shy with the praise, but it’s obvious he really likes it, so you touch him more and whisper sweet words into his ear with a kiss, “oh- oh my- daddy- please i-”
“you’re so cute, sweetie pie, especially when you’re feeling good, you look so pretty and content. it’s my favorite sight,” you say adoringly, looking at him with the biggest heart eyes.
“wow, i didn’t expect to like this this much but-“ he whispers, “-i kinda love it.”
im changkyun/i.m:
he doesn’t react much when you say it, making you wonder if he was uncomfortable or not into it, but in any case, you assume it’s going to be forgotten in a few days and there would be nothing to worry about.
until he’s trying to get you to play with him and you’re trying to work. he can’t deny that he gets horny easily and you’re right there! he tries to tease in an way he can think possible, but to no avail. you’re still just sitting there, typing away on your laptop.
“just another thirty minutes, and then im all yours, baby,” you murmur to him, and he pouts subconsciously out of frustration.
he gets an idea, and i’m sure you know what it is.
“alright, you’re busy and i respect that. i guess i’ll just leave you be and go play by myself, daddy,” he giggles when you look over at him for the first time in this encounter and then he walks away.
as he sits on the bed in your bedroom, he awaits the sound of your footsteps, knowing he’s won. the door opens, and you walk in too casually, enough to make him suspicious, until he’s pulled onto your lap with your lips on his shoulder. your hands sneak under his hoodie, and his hands brace himself on your shoulders for stability, “ah- y/n-”
“baby, i did not set aside my work that’s due tomorrow morning to come fuck your brains out just for you to call me that,” he shivers, so incredibly turned on, “try again.”
taglist: @lovingonrepeat @neosincity @sub-hoshi-enthusiast @multidreams-and-desires @hobilluvvr @vanillaknj @yr-domxfantasies @treasure-hwa @fleurshopsub @rubyscloud9 @silencefavarchive @nct99 @bigkpopstan @monstaxdirtywonk @domreaderrecs @mochi-ficz and always feel free to ask to be added to/removed from the taglist <3
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yesimwriting · 3 years
Text
The Promise of Rain, blurb 2
The Promise of Rain (part 2?? technically) 
A/n I was not originally planning a second part for this but some people wanted it and this idea came to me and it works better with the context of ‘The Promise of Rain’ but it can technically be read as a stand alone :))
Anyways this might turn into a small series of kinda connected blurbs that are all kind of canon with each other but aren’t necessarily connected except for the reader’s background (the reader is a very sunshine-y person and knows Kaz bc she’s a runaway princess that he was hired to bring back home but she managed to convince him to let her work for him instead)
--
The night air had left me with a chill that made me want nothing more than to have my covers draped over me as I read. I’m normally more sociable after a job, especially after such a simple and safe ending, but a lot of tonight had left me wanting to be alone. 
Well, not truly alone. The company of my books is always welcomed, but tonight I can’t seem to find much comfort within the pages. After almost every paragraph, I find myself distracted by gusts of wind and thoughts of the heavy, silver clouds that seem to make up tonight. A part of me longs for the rain. I know it’s ridiculous to expect rain each time I desire some sense of comfort, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it. Especially when the sky so clearly implies it. 
“This must be the fifth time I’ve come here and you’ve been reading.” Kaz’s sudden appearance is almost enough to shake away my lingering somberness. 
I roll my eyes slightly, turning my attention back to the page in front of me. “That observation is just a testament to how often you come in here.” 
His glare is half hearted, a look I’d find endearing if I was less annoyed. “Where else am I going to find a reminder that good people exist in Ketterdam?” 
I think he may have a sixth sense that warns him when I’m treading the line between being annoyed and displeased. Everytime I find myself mad at him in a way that makes me want to avoid him instead of yell at him, Kaz makes some ridiculously heart-melting comment. He steps further into the room. I don’t miss the way he eyes my stretched out legs. Ever since the conversation we had after he woke up after an injury, we’ve fallen into the unmentioned habit of silently inviting the other to stay by moving to make room for them. 
It had started the day after the conversation in which Kaz had admitted that he wanted me to stay with him. He had been sitting on the small couch while discussing the details of a job. Shortly after I walked in he made a point of shifting so that he was clearly on one side of the couch. I didn’t think much about sitting down, but Inej and Jesper exchanged a look. 
Now, though, I keep my legs stretched out on the bed. He eyes my position on the bed, something grim crossing his features. 
“It might rain tonight.” 
He knows me so damn well. I hate it. “I hope so.”
I turn my head, analyzing the way the world seems to be on the cusp of something. I stare at the silver clouds until I feel something hard tap my leg. The tap is firm but not painful. I’m quick to look at Kaz as he lowers his cane. The mention of rain had been a distraction. 
“You distracted me on purpose.” 
“The first rule of the Barrel is to always be prepared.” There’s a slight uptilt to his lips, something I’ve learned to interpret as a sign of teasing. 
How is he so easy to be around one second and so cold the next? I resist a smile. “I’ll take notes.” 
Kaz ignores my passive aggressive tone. His focus seems to be on my legs that have still not moved to offer him a place next to me. “You wear your emotions too openly.” Great, he’s going to make us talk about it. “What reason could you possibly have to be mad at me?”
“I’m not mad at you.” It’s a partial truth. 
His expression harshens. “Don’t lie.” 
“I’m not thrilled with you, but I don’t think that’s the same as being mad.” 
Kaz lets out a partial sigh. “No, they’re not the same.” Such an early concession feels like a trap. “With you, the first option is worse.” I don’t have anything to say to that. “Is this because of what I said to Jesper?” 
My posture straightens on instinct. “He wants your validation more than he’d ever admit and I understand that expressing praise isn’t exactly something you do, but would it kill you to not actively insult him?” 
“I didn’t say anything that was wrong. He thinks he’s a gambler but he’s just someone born for losses.” The look I give him must mean something to him, because Kaz is quick to tact on, “That doesn’t make him less valuable of an asset or less relatively dependable.” 
I eye him cautiously, the slightest bit of vulnerability playing at his features. “Don’t look at me like that--and don’t tell me that. Jesper’s the one who could use the occasional reminder from you that you hold him to any regard with positive connotations.” His lips press together like he’s thinking about scolding me for scolding him. “It’s only because I know you care more about Jesper than you’d ever let on.” 
“Jesper’s esteem can handle the blow.” The curtness of his voice is a blow in its own sense. “And he didn’t exactly deserve to be in my good graces after what he did tonight.” 
My sigh is not weighted enough to match Kaz’s newfound fountain of emotion. “We were successful--”
“He left you.” I didn’t know Kaz’s voice was capable of such harshness. “I paired him with you, and he left you--and you almost didn’t make it.” I let the weight of his words take up all the available space in the room, keeping the silence that follows them until some of the heaviness has dissipated. “He could have cost me one of my best people.”
Oh. His harshness, his unwarranted coldness, had been a manifestation of his concern. For me. Guilt knots my stomach. Potential words that may offer Kaz some sort of support raise and die back down in my throat. Kaz turns towards the door. 
“Kaz.” He pauses. There’s a long moment in which I think he won’t turn around, but finally, he does. I tuck my legs beneath me, forcing myself to sit up a little straighter. “I told Jesper to leave because I knew the job would have failed if he had been trapped in that room with me.” I drop my gaze towards the window. “I was right, the job was successful, and I got out in time so it was worth it.”
“You risked your safety?” The harsh facet of his being is making its return in full force. 
“For the job,” I’m careful to keep my words factual, “It’s what we’re supposed to do.”
Kaz’s jaw locks. “When I said that keeping you near me would ruin you this is what I meant.” 
Is it really this big of a deal? I made it out. “Kaz.”
“This wasn’t my best idea.” His words are leached of anything. “You’re going back home. Tomorrow I’ll arrange the voyage myse--” 
“Kaz Brekker you may get to live your life doing anything you want but you don’t get to control mine.” My chin raises an inch, an instinctual act of subtle rebellion. “I am not going back there, even if I’m technically indebted to you because you didn’t return me to my father but that does not mean I’ll--”
“I’m not trying to control you.” His words are sharp, boarding on a yell. “A job like that one wasn’t worth you.” 
From Kaz, I know those words are heavy. There’s a lot of things I could say to that. I could tell him that I wanted to do something for him. I could say that I appreciate him telling me that. I could even say that in his own way, Kaz giving Jesper a hard time because he left me, is kind of cute in a misguided way. The thing is I think all of these responses will make things worse. 
“Kaz,” I keep my voice as steady as possible, “I’m fine, you’re fine, it all worked out.” Scratching the back of my arm, I exhale gently. “I’ll be more careful next time, I promise.” 
I watch him carefully, there’s a slight slump to his shoulders as he exhales. Is the fight leaving him so easily? He walks further into the room. “You better.” He sits down in the space I provided for him slowly. “If you’re not you’ll have worse things to worry about than anything that can happen to you on a job.” He moves his cane forward easily, tapping my knee in a swift motion. 
I roll my eyes at the mock threat. “They do say that there’s nothing to fear in the Barrel like the Dirtyhands.” 
“Remember that.” Any edge in his voice is forced. I fight against a smile that seems to always want to break across my face whenever I think I see something resembling lightness in Kaz. 
“I don’t think I could forget anything about you.” 
He turns his head slightly. “You should.” 
“Too bad.” 
Kaz leans his back against the wall, untensing slightly. “I think you just like disagreeing with me.” 
There’s no point in lying about it. “Only because when you argue with me you give me this really particular look.” 
“A look?” 
Adding insult to injury, I smile. “Sometimes you look like you’re too focused on being angry, like you’re compensating for something.” 
Kaz lets out a bitter sigh. “Maybe if you were less of a puppy I wouldn’t have to--”
The laugh that escapes is most definitely a mistake. “Did you just call me a puppy?” I don’t give him a chance to reply, laughter taking over again. “I mean this in the least argumentative way possible--but you’re so weird sometimes.” 
He rolls his eyes, tensing. “I’m leaving.”
I stifle the rest of my laughter. “No. I was--I was kidding!” I keep my eyes on Kaz, expecting some type of annoyed glare, but his expression is a lot more weighted than that. Odd. “Kaz?” 
“You need to be more careful.” I understand Kaz’s pause as something he does before saying something outside of his nature. “I’m not asking you this as a Crow or a Dreg.” 
On instinct, my posture straightens. “I promised and I meant it.” 
“Sometimes I wish I could believe in Saints,” his voice has taken off a distant quality, almost fragile, “That way I could believe something existed to help what matters.” 
Oh. “You never fail, even if I didn’t believe in Saints I’d believe in you.” 
“You’re wasting your faith.” The sound of lightning cracking is almost enough to make me jump. The rain finally came. 
I know I’ll never convince him that that’s not true. “I don’t think so, but that’s why it’s called faith.” 
“I have faith in some things.” His expression is far off. 
“Like what?” 
Kaz’s eyes find the window. “People that find meaning in the rain.” 
Something in my chest swells. “You’re like the rain.”
We sit there in silence, watching raindrops glide down the window. “What were you reading?” 
The question has me dropping my gaze to the forgotten book on my lap. “I stole this book from the palace before I left. It was my mom’s favorite, she’s read it so much the spine’s completely cracked and the cover is practically falling off.” 
“Hm…” He mumbles. “Read some, the books read in a palace must be worthwhile.” 
A part of me wants to tell him that elitism has no place in literature, but his request leaves me frozen. I nod once, turning to the first page of the book. “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife--” 
“Your upbringing makes sense--” 
“You can’t judge it off the first sentence,” he’s insufferable, “It’s setting up irony, and if you’re going to complain--” 
He lets out a conceding sigh. “I’m listening, I’m not interrupting.” 
I keep my eyes on him for a second longer than I should. “Okay.” Dropping my gaze back to the book, I adjust my grip on the worn paperback, “Good.” 
And then I keep reading. 
--
@theincredibledeadlyviper @grishaverse7 @lonelystarship @mentally-in-northern-italy @uhanddreag 
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mc-lukanette · 3 years
Note
do you have any lukanette ideas with chat/adrien salt? the newest episode reignited my annoyance towards him and his stans acting like he didn’t do anything wrong is not helping. i mean, flirting with ladybug while he’s dating kagami? getting excited over a possible akumatization?? and since i know that behavior won’t be addressed bc adrien is “perfect” and “the love square is endgame” therefore he gets a pass for any bad behavior, i was hoping for some fanmade salt (and lukanette is always a great addition to any story)
I can appreciate how starved you guys are to hear me salt on this blog.
But yeah, I came up with something considering that quite a bit of Chat’s behavior happens before Truth appears in “Lies.”
So hear me out--
Truth is a threat, considering that Luka is the only hero outside of Ladybug intended to be a planner. All others take orders directly from Ladybug herself, but Viperion could plan on his own.
This means that Truth realizes quickly that his strategy of asking for the heroes’ identities isn’t going to work because they’ll shout over him every time. He has to get creative and comes up with the idea to divide the heroes.
He comments on their teamwork, perhaps saying vaguely about how their teamwork can’t outmatch his and Pharo’s. Chat obviously takes the bait, talking on and on about how he and Ladybug are the best team and that they’re made for each other.
“Really?” Truth asks casually. “You’ve never done anything against her?”
Chat Noir responds, his white lips moving to say, “Of course I have!”
Ladybug gapes, and Chat looks calm for a second before his eyes immediately widen in panic.
He tries to say that it’s not what he means, but Truth’s power is active, so he just blurts out, “That’s exactly what I mean!”
He tries to cover his mouth with his non-Cataclysm hand, but gets shot by Pharo.
“I told Theo Barbot that we were dating and it got him akumatized!”
“You did what?!” Ladybug asks, having never heard this before.
Chat doesn’t stop - he can’t - and his mouth keeps moving. He admits that he sacrifices himself because he knows it won’t matter since Ladybug will fix it, and it means he’ll always leave an impression on her. He admits that he didn’t care when Nadja or Alya were egging on the LadyNoir ship because he feels like Ladybug will come around eventually. He admits that he doesn’t take her seriously when she goes off on him because “she’s cute when she’s angry.” He admits that he wanted an akuma to happen even though he knew Ladybug was busy, just because he wanted to spend time with her. He admits to telling his kwami he’d quit while Paris was underwater if he didn’t spill what Ladybug was hiding.
Honestly, even Truth at this point is like, “man I wanted to divide your teamwork, not your entire relationship.”
Ladybug eventually manages to snap out of her trance and deal with the whole situation (mostly by herself), but the damage is done. Even after the akuma has been purified and Truth turns back into Luka, Chat’s words linger and Ladybug ignores him.
“Are you okay, Luka?”
“Huh? Ah, yeah, thanks...”
Chat is awkwardly standing nearby, his tail in both hands as he fiddles with it. “So--ah... Bugaboo--”
“Don’t,” Ladybug cuts in, not even looking at him. “Is that why you use that nickname when I’m mad? To butter me up? Try to earn points? Do you think it’s funny?”
“No, no!” He waves his hands frantically. “It’s not--”
“See, the thing is that now I won’t know whether you’re lying or not,” she points out, the situation feeling all to familiar to when Tikki lied to her, only this was worse. She honestly wanted to trust Chat Noir; he was her partner, irreplaceable in the sense that he was there from the start.
But maybe not irreplaceable elsewhere.
“I wouldn’t lie to you!” he swears.
“But you’ll keep things from me,” she counters. She sighs, gently taking Luka’s hand and helping him stand, then addressing him as she says, “I’ll take you home, alright?”
Luka’s gaze briefly flickers between the two of them, but he asks no questions and nods. “Thank you.”
She guides him up the staircase to take him up to the balcony, Chat Noir rushing over to stand at the bottom of the steps.
“M’lady--!”
Ladybug turns to him with a silencing glare. “I really don’t want to be around you right now. We’ll talk later when I’m ready.”
(He’s going to be in for a long talk when they finally meet back up again, and suddenly, he isn’t so eager for an akuma to come rushing by to force them to come back together as a team.)
And with that, Ladybug goes up to the balcony, takes Luka in her arms, and leaves. Things are quiet at first, her taking in a few breaths of the night air as she tries to relax.
The past few days had been a mess, and that was putting it lightly. The kwami, dating, the akuma (that Chat Noir had apparently been soooo excited about), and now this big revelation. The stress must show on her face too, as she can occasionally feel Luka’s concerned gaze on her.
In a way, it’s nice, just having her boyfriend care like this, even when she’s in a mask. He’d put up with way more for her than she felt like he should’ve, and she knew that he’d disagree if she even dared to voice that thought.
Without really thinking, she starts talking to him. She talks about Ladybug, about everything; being thrown into this life that she didn’t ask for, and being happy to save Paris but sad at the emotional toll it takes. She tells him about all the friends who tease her for her lateness, and while it might’ve been funny at first - she was genuinely absent-minded at times - it doesn’t become as funny when knowing that it was something that couldn’t be helped.
“...I’m sorry you’re going through that,” Luka says in an offer of comfort. He sighs, not recoiling from her but it feels like he’s distant anyway. “I know it didn’t help that I was akumatized. I hope I didn’t do anything to Marinette.”
Her gaze softens; of course he’s thinking of her again. It’s Luka, she has no right to be surprised.
Chat Noir, meanwhile, was just thinking of himself.
“Actually,” she corrects, something occurring to her, “I think you might’ve helped in your own way.”
Luka tilts his head at her, puzzled.
She changes course just slightly, specifically to a spot not too far from the Liberty; one that is very familiar to both of them, and she can tell by the way his brows raise that he’s surprised by where she’s about to land.
Underneath the bridge, in the spot where he’d initially asked her - when she was Marinette - where she’d always been going, just before he got akumatized.
She sets him down, then paces around to try and clear her head.
“...Like I said, I didn’t get a lot of choice in this,” she begins. “I tried to give my miraculous up once in the beginning, but there was so much pressure and everything was going wrong. Then, things would just--happen around me, things that I couldn’t really think of--and this is coming from me!” She turns to him dramatically, gesturing to herself. “I imagine things going wrong all the time and I still can’t predict when they actually do!”
Luka chuckles lightly at that, but otherwise stays quiet, unsure of where she’s going with this but giving her his full attention.
“Me becoming the new guardian of the miraculouses so out of nowhere... it was a lot, and suddenly I had a bunch of kwami around my room who all wanted to get into my stuff or mess around. I didn’t choose to let them out; it just happened when I was trying to see how the box with all the miraculouses worked.” She groans a bit, rubbing her forehead as she paces around again. “Then in came Shadow Moth and all the akuma showing up, and now I’m even busier. I can’t even make time for my boyfriend.”
There’s a flicker of emotion in Luka’s eyes at that, but he doesn’t say anything, though his fingers twitch slightly at his sides.
“Then--” She looks down. “--there’s Chat Noir. I didn’t choose him either; the old guardian chose him for me, and he wasn’t even fully trained. I was Chat’s partner and that was it; I didn’t get a choice to give up, it just... was, and I have to deal with whatever the relationship--” She makes a face at the word. “--we have is, because if something goes wrong then everything can go wrong, and then Paris is in danger.”
She shakes her head, realizing that she’s rambling. She continues staring quietly at the ground, then releases the tenseness in her shoulders.
“But...” She looks up to meet Luka’s gaze. “I did choose you, Luka. I finally got to choose something for me, and the only thing I regret about it is everything that I can’t choose. You chose me and I chose you and...” She almost laughs. “It’s weird that it’s that simple for once.”
He’s clearly pieced the puzzle together by now but hasn’t quite processed the result. She can see the whisper of her name on his lips and she smiles at him, taking a step back and spreading her arms wide.
“You’re my real partner, Luka. You get me, you care about me, and we’re similar but different and it’s great.” She swallows, feeling her nerves building a little but pushing forward enthusiastically nonetheless. “So I want to make a choice for us, because we trust each other and I want to give you something no one else has.”
Then, she closes her eyes, taking a breath and briefly tightening her hands into fists.
“Tikki, spots off.”
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Text
perfect now - a close reading
only pure and true love for this one. it’s soft and sweet because the one he wrote it for is and needs cheesy uncool romcom soundtrack-worthy affirmations and it’s the most wonderful thing oh my the flurries 
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some album booklet art for your viewing pleasure
((just a warning for below: while the lyric analysis was kept fairly neutral and close to the words and their meaning, more and more parallels did ensure me larrying out by the time the analysis kicked off so if you’re not into that, you can skip this one!))
⟼ check out @bluewinnerangel​ ‘s magnificent post with all the parallels to 1d/h&l bc it’s exhaustive and was a source for mine <3 thank you again for your service <3 bc this song really is a fanpiece of every song that has been important to them throughout their career so far, whether they wrote it or not, and it’s honestly kinda impressive
SUMMARY
you’re sad and i love you so much i will do anything to make that undone but while you’re sad know that i sill very much love you and you’re also strong enough to conquer all of this on your own but i’ll be by your side anyway
lyric breakdown ft. the many parallels, incl. little things, through the dark and wmyb
what this says about louis, his partner and the relationship he is in
never gonna dance again frenzy
identity 
louis is a marvellous majestic sonofabitch basically <3
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walls, track 10
~ little things “you still have to squeeze into your jeans, but you’re perfect to me”
You don’t feel pretty and it’s hard to miss
You don’t feel pretty and it’s hard to miss
later lyric: “like a neon sign” - i see through you trying to hide away your insecurities
I wish that you could see my point of view As someone staring back at you
“you” is also staring at him, but perhaps is too insecure to realise how mutual the adoration is
i wish i could get you out of your own negative spiral and give you a look at yourself from my perspective
~ wmyb “everyone else in the room can see it, everyone else but you” 
~ wmyb “right now i’m looking at you and i can’t believe you don’t know you’re beautiful”
~ little things “you never love yourself half as much as I love you, and you’ll never treat yourself right darling but I want you to. If I let you know, I’m here for you, maybe you’ll love yourself like I love you”
On Friday night when we’re all out I turn to you and you’re looking down And you don’t wanna dance I know you love to dance You never stop given half the chance
heavy echoes of kmm again, but the opposite: the “nightmare on the dance floor” doesn’t want to dance
when “you” is confident rlly not being subtle with who i think that is, they love to dance <-> tpwk “feeling good in my skin, i just keep on dancing”
“i know you love to dance” = i know what you love bc i love you
“given half the chance” 
~ tpwk “giving/given second chances”
given a chance tattoo, making another appearance (see below for more tattoo meltdowns)
Just keep your head up, love, keep your head up
term of endearment <3 
~ dlibyh
this album is full of encouragement to keep going and as much as it gives me life it ruins me 
Don’t hide away, don’t ever change
“be happy, proud”
~ “just hold on”
“pick someone who’s supportive”
Keep your head up, love, keep your head up Don’t look away, don’t look away
don’t look away from me
~ through the dark “and I can see your head is held in shame”
Cause everybody’s looking at you now, my, oh my
they have the stage to themselves / new career paths they’re doing on their own
could also mean ppl they’re going out with are looking at them, which “you” interprets as sth negative, which makes them self-conscious, while they’re actually admiring them bc they steal the scene
~ wmyb “you’re turning heads when you walk through the door”
I guess some queens don’t need a crown And I know why Even when your tears are falling down Still, somehow, you’re perfect now
“you” is royalty to louis, to put it simply 
they don’t need something on their head to make it known to everyone else - they’re a queen and everyone knows it
gendered: female - also used in drag contexts - the only time L has used any gendered word to identify his partner on the entire album (more on this below)
~ steal my girl "she's been my queen since we were sixteen" can't believe i forgot this one thank you @mortalenemiestolovers for reminding me!!!
~ falling
~ through the dark “you tell me that your tears are here to stay”
You never do, but if you asked me to I’ll tell the truth lying next to you
“you” never asks for affirmations directly, but by saying shit like their pants are too tight make it clear enough to L that they do need to hear once in a while that it’s not true
Cause you’re the only one when it’s said and done You make me feel like being someone 
Good to you even at your worst
~ always you
i love you so much you are a force of life to me, and even when you hate me i want more
~ drag me down “If I didn’t have you there would be nothing left, the shell of a man who could never be his best. If I didn’t have you, I’d never see the sun. You taught me how to be someone” (sung by louis first, harry second) 
~ through the dark “even if you scream and shout, it’ll come back to you and I’ll be here for you
You steal the scene and it’s unrehearsed
reference to working on a stage - their natural presence wins everyone over - that charisma is never manufactured
Don’t you wanna dance? Just a little dance I’ll never stop given half the chance
L keeps encouraging them, will also not pass by any chance to dance with them
Every insecurity, like a neon sign, as bright as day If you knew what you were to me You would never try to hide away
“it’s hard to miss”
L sees through them trying to hide their insecurities, pretend to be strong
~ through the dark “but I know you were only hiding”
SYNTHESIS
Perfect Now is not a fan favorite and I am so not here for that discourse, so please do not pester me with negativity about this chocolate drop of a song. 
As others have pointed out, the parallels with other songs written by Louis, Harry or for One Direction are extremely present. Especially Little Things is echoed loudly, but there’s so much more to be read, as you’ve seen. These are songs that are clearly near and dear to Louis, bc he wrote them or bc performing them was special, like with Little Things and What Makes You Beautiful. A lot of the same emotions come back in Louis’s writing, so much so that you can’t help but see the larger story behind it all. Throughout Walls you can hear him singing about not giving up and holding your head high despite hardships, and if you look back at his earlier writing, it’s always been there. Through the Dark is an early and striking example of this style of Louis song: you’re sad and i love you so much i will do anything to make that undone but while you’re sad know that i sill very much love you and you’re also strong enough to conquer all of this on your own but i’ll be by your side anyway 
basically through the dark’s chorus:
Oh, I will carry you over Fire and water for your love And I will hold you closer Hope your heart is strong enough When the night is coming down on you We will find a way Through the dark
It is very clear that Louis is faced with a partner - I can freely say it’s Harry now right? are the antis gone by now? i think so - that struggles with his body, with his identity, with how he wants to present himself vs how opinions on that might push him down and dampen his spirit. Louis, always the supportive boyfriend, then tries his best to make him see the light, while keeping that space for his sadness, his struggles, or their joint struggles. Accept the sadness but don’t lose your heart to it.
I’ve linked @bluewinnerangel​ ‘s post at the start of this post, but I need to stress how good it is once more as I also shamelessly insert a screenshot from it here bc it makes me feel a lot and summarizes perfectly just how deeply Perfect Now is woven into the history of their lives, relationship and especially “you”s/Harry’s personal struggle with their identity/body/confidence...
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Because yes, i absolutely think these tattoos are being echoed in the song. “Never gonna dance again” as a lyric and then as a tattoo on Harry’s legs like shackles around his ankles represents the sensation of shame, of being stuck, bc of your desires, bc of your sexuality. Obviously we can never know why Harry got the tattoo, as in what experience pushed him to choose those lyrics or what exactly he recognizes in himself, but it’s safe to say it’s about the struggles of being queer and navigating relationships with that identity and with others.
Most importantly, the sense of shamelessly dancing, dancing like no one’s watching, dancing together with your lover, as a celebration of self, life, love, is the key here. Harry got that tattoo ages ago, at a time when he undoubtedly felt way more stuck. When he couldn’t dance freely the way he wanted to and with whom he wanted to. Perfect Now is a reminder to him, an encouragement to still dance if he wants to, no matter what people say or think. Significantly, then, Harry’s own Treat People With Kindness heavily features that same sentiment, but in an extremely positive light: i have found a place (in life and in myself) where i feel like i have given and was given second chances and now i dance bc i finally feel good in my skin.
Louis has obviously been there from the start, or at least from when or before Harry properly started experimenting with/questioning how he likes to present and how he identifies as. Before he ever dared to consider pulling on a pair of women’s skinny jeans, never mind a ball gown. Louis has seen him limit himself as well as being limited by others ofc and has always seemed to have been there, with a secure hand on Harry’s back, to encourage him. Even at a time when boys wearing nail polish or skirts was unthinkable. Just remember how much encouragement Harry needed when growing out his hair; Louis literally joined him. yes this might make me cry okay i need to stop bc i’m going off track and this is just becoming a larry breakdown while i was trying to hype up this beautiful song. 
What I’m trying to say is: Louis has always seen all of Harry. He’s always had his back, no matter what. He’s loved every part of him. And now, on a completely gender neutral album, in the sweetest, softest song off of the entire thing, Louis puts in the word “queen”, and that is so very deliberate it makes me want to scream. It’s Louis confirming his love again and again while affirming the multitudes contained by Harry, including everything involving his gender journey. brb crying
It’s a raw Louis, an honest, sweet, kind, loving partner, and both of them are fucking lucky to have each other, and I also wish that all of us end up in a caring and wholesome relationship like that. I truly do.
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babypinkhearts · 3 years
Note
Hello i was wondering if I could request a headcannon for dating killua or gon (you can choose who bc i can't)😆😆😆😆
ahh! i can’t decide either!
...
how about both? :)
pairings: gon + reader & killua + reader
warnings: none!
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gon freecss
now...
this relationship is definitely a rollercoaster
gon is a naturally hyper and out-going person
which means-
you’d have to adjust in some way
your relationship is built on pure trust in each other
no trust - no way of getting through to him
he relies on people too easily - so it isn’t hard for you to nudge yourself into his life
the two of you had known each other since the start of the hunter exam
from there on - your years spent together morphed into the realization that you two exchanged mutual feelings
therefore - causing the two of you to become a couple
gon as a boyfriend is an interesting concept to think about
he loves conversations
give this kid a topic and he could talk to you about it for days
he’s a social person - it runs through his veins
not from ging though
an upside of gon’s unique personality is that he’s practically always happy
rarely do you see him reflect any other emotion
excluding the chimera ant arc
he’s a positive outlook on your life
you admire him - he stays optimistic through difficult times
for one-
when going through the journey of finding his father, he hardly got frustrated
a determined grin was plastered on his face the whole time
he’s ready for almost anything - it’s frightening... but admittedly admirable
if you’re in the slumps, gon will try to talk to you and lift your mood
motivational words can be spoken from him
impressive, given his lack of the ability in grasping information
you think his short-circuits are cute, though
gon practically worships the ground you walk on
he’s very blunt - so sometimes when he verbally expresses his feelings it can catch you by surprise
he loves watching the flustered look on your face though
when he introduces you to somebody, he always says “this is my my girlfriend, y/n!”
clearly, he’s proud to call you his
vice versa
but of course - there’s downsides to every relationship
as seen from numerous occasions-
gon can be selfish.
this can sometimes apply to your own relationship, as dreadful as it sounds
the worst part is that half the time, he doesn’t realize the effects of his actions
or - maybe he plays clueless
you can’t tell the difference
skipping dates, leaving you abruptly, or forgetting events are all occasional occurrences that could be expected from him
at times, he does things to only gain for his benefit
he genuinely forgets important things
most of the time, he has something else on his mind that he deems is worth more impotance
though, that doesn’t entirely mean that YOU aren’t important to him
you’re his s/o! he loves you to death
it’s just that if he craves something, he’s willing to risk everything he has just to obtain it
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killua zoldyck
bless the both you
a relationship with killua would be packed with pure teasing and shy exchanges
killua isn’t much of a verbally or physically expressive person- he much rather keep his thoughts to himself
but you’re there to help him
so you do
overtime, you two build an emotional attachment to one another
this is when he realizes that he’d much rather stay with you for the rest of his life than be limited to being good friends
so you become his s/o
dating killua is much like being in a relationship with your best friend
the two of you click amazingly
your favorite thing about him?
he’s an AMAZING listener
and he gives the best hugs
no one can convince me otherwise
if he listens to you, you’re gonna have to listen to him
that is, if he wants to talk
killua’s past is traumatic - it’s clear. he doesn’t like to talk much about it, though it’s apparent that’s it’s damaged him in the long-run
he’s scared of commitment, and new things make him wary
but you’re here to coach him through it all! :)
i feel like he’d eventually open up after a bit
and i also get the feeling that he’d tear-up while doing so
he’s so touch-starved, please give him affection
he tries to play it off cool and act like he dislikes it, but secretly he savors all of your touches
you make him so happy
his world is content when you’re there
much like yours is when he’s there
killua likes to tease you a lot
he’ll never go to far! he knows his limits
but he does enjoy seeing you fake-roll your eyes at him
it makes him smile so wide
you’re genuinely perfect to him aw
now!
in the hunter world - there is bound to be some evil lurking
being in constant avoidance of his family - killua tries his best to ensure you never meet any other zoldyck that isn’t alluka or milluki (and maybe kalluto) - aka his least threatening family members
from illumi’s perspective - you could possibly be inadequate for killua
which grants your name in his list of targets
quite obviously, this doesn’t sit well with killua AT ALL
sure, it had been a while since he had seen or heard from illumi, but he still wasn’t sure if he was stronger than him
back when he had confronted him at the hunter exam, he was a pure shrimp compared to him
but now - needless and powerful with nen, he’s positive he could put up some fight
he’ll keep you protected at all costs
it doesn’t matter if you can fight for yourself - he’ll step in anyway
any fight, any problem
it’s sweet of him, though you can’t help but feel he thinks of you as incapable of fighting your own battles
you’re sure he doesn’t mean to come off that way
also! you are by far alluka’s favorite person
sorry killua
the three of you go on adventures all the time, and you never as for a better group to be with
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bbhyeoliskooks · 3 years
Text
«❝ 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 ❞» - PT. TWO
Yeonjun was the one to break up with you, so why does he want you back now?
➸ check part one out here!
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«────« ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
Pairing: Yeonjun x Reader (female)
Genre: 335 cups of fluff and 3 cups of angst
Warnings: a bit suggestive maybe??? cursing, eating, cheesy cringe stuff hehe, ++ unedited so there may be a lot of mistakes !!
Song: I’ll Never Love This Way Again
(YUH OMG FINALLY I FINISHED THIS REQUEST IM SCREAMING OMG??? i’m so sorry that this took so long, i know a lot of people waited for it 😭😭 and for the anon who requested this bc there wasn’t a notif- keah accidentally deleted it 😭😭. ngl i would die for yeonjun in this. ANYWAY, i hope you enjoyyy~~ i rlly liked doing something like this and yes i have to mention the happiness it gave me at 1am when i finally finished it 😌💕)
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
As easy as it was to say compared to real life, Choi Yeonjun was a wreck. A horrible, horrible and you must’ve forget to say- horrible wreck! That is including the duration of time before and after the second time you left.
How he roused one morning to you no where in sight after a vicious night of going out was something he deeply regretted. He would do anything to go back to that day, of course. He wasn’t sure about how you were doing, but jeez did he want to see those bright glints in your eyes whenever you saw him again. To see you smiling like nothing was wrong or giggling when he finally made ticklish contact on those sensitive places or even how you’d frown before him due to his carelessness. His mind drew him back to the ungodly hour of 4am when you scolded him for the scar on his arm he didn’t seem to realize until later and the way you made sure nothing else on his body was hurt. Yeah anyone could tell that didn’t go very well considering he was a boy and you were a girl, but that wasn’t the point!
In simple terms, he missed you more than anyone he’s ever laid eyes upon and the plain truth was that. You weren’t easy to be shaken off his mind after that ordeal of getting you to himself for one, final night. It hurt him most to see the disgusted expression on your face as if you were staring straight at a pile of elephant poop on the ground, not wanting to do anything with it because it was useless and foul. He couldn’t possibly make it your fault too, which meant he shouldn’t have been surprised. Breaking your poor heart by insulting you and taking you for granted, everything was wrong with him for thinking this way!
Whether he liked it or not, his heart said differently about this matter.
Perhaps it was the way you looked that night- he could say- however, it was more than that. With your adoring, sparkling eyes that weren’t easy to miss and your stunning, contagious smile that caused ripples of happiness to fly across the room, he couldn’t blame anyone for falling in love with you. After all, he was a victim of it himself so there was no way he could’ve not in the end. All of those things were true especially, but taking in everything to account as well hanging out with you, your unique individual beauty meant nothing.
He just loved you for you. Loved? No, not loved. Loves. He still loves you for you, and he was a fool to realize it this late. He just lost the best thing in his life due to his stupidity; he knew fully well that you couldn’t ever bring yourself to talk to him face-to-face again if the two of you met again. Would you two even come to meet in the first place? That was the true question here. He and you both knew that due to your resistance and remorse for what happened last weekend that you would never permit yourself to see him. Like he said, he couldn’t blame you for that either.
And yet, why is he trying to convince himself that he’s the only one for you? Your every smile was originally because of him, but now... but now, you’d never let him hear that for one, last time. He couldn’t redo his mistakes of the past of hurting you even if he promised never to do that again. And judging this situation, destiny wouldn’t allow that to happen anyway. With all of your encounters, it seemed as if they all turned out the same way. Everything was ripped into shreds.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
“Wait, so you sLEPT WITH HIM?!” Soobin’s voice reached to a dangerous while the two of you paced around the hallways together, trying to quietly talk about last weekend until he so rudely screamed about your untrue administrations. You clasped your hand over his mouth in instinct, punching his shoulder as a warning to keep quiet or else. His body heaved with hearty chuckles while you screamed, telling him to keep his voice down so that you could truly tell him the whole story.
“Soobin! That’s not true; I wouldn’t do anything like that, ever!”
“Well, he’s your ex- and he’s hot, so why wouldn’t you sleep with him?!”
Now some of the students subtly shuffled around to eavesdrop on your conversation, and you groaned at the newfound attention. Just what were you thinking about telling him when sometimes he could contradict himself to be this loud?! It was steaming tea, yes, but no one else had to hear about it! You should’ve told him this stuff at lunch when the two of you were alone.
Swiftly pulling Soobin to the vacant hallway where thankfully no one else was walking, you made sure to keep your voice to a faint hush. You weren’t sure if he could hear you, but you couldn’t risk involving anyone else in this personal matter. Students passed by all around you in the other hallway, holding conversations and walking in groups which was a good sign you could actually speak normally since no one was paying attention anymore.
“So did you or did you not?” He mused, ruffling the top of your head. You pushed his hand away, rolling your eyes at his playfulness when the gravity of the situation needed to be comprehended instead.
“Soobin, I told you we never slept together in that sense last weekend. We were both drunk and shared the same bed! It doesn’t mean anything and we aren’t going to get back together,” you held your breath through those words as you watched the amused smile on his face turn into a pitiful, pouting lip. His adorable puppy dog eyes that were begging you not to get mad at him didn’t seem to work now, and you found yourself telling him off even if you didn’t mean to in the first place.
“You’re so stupid for thinking that, you know?! Yeonjun’s a jerk, I have no clue why I ever got with that bastard in the first place! God, if you never let us meet together then you know I would’ve been happy now. Just why did everything have to turn out this way?!”
The walls of your heart you tried so hard to buttress through your words and actions crumbled with every second you spoke, disintegrating into pure dust the moment your voice leveled to reach your anger. Your chest was trembling as you choked out the last few words, unable to say anything anymore as a lump appeared in your throat. You hated being weak in front of him the most because he’s seen you so many times like this before and he’d very clearly think of you as a crybaby.
He seemed to understand this, shooting you a gently smile as some small encouragement. It was that smile that urged you to snap out of your evil trance immediately. For saying all those rude things to him, it was contradictory since at that very moment you wanted to take everything back. The guilt ate you up in an instant once you took in his dumbfound yet soft expression, causing you to envelope him in a warm embrace as contrition. He never deserved this treatment when it wasn’t even his fault anyway.
“I... I’m sorry, Soobin. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. It’s just so hard on me now since I know I shouldn’t have done that with him last weekend. We didn’t do a lot, and yet I still want to say that I love him...? Even now I won’t allow myself to cry and be weak but,” your voice faltered as your body slightly shivered, “I can’t do it. I just can’t be strong anymore. It’s so hard.”
Soobin sighed, generously allowing you to lean on him like last time. You were so strong- you had always been so strong in front of him, and it hurt him to see that you were slowly breaking no matter how much you tried to stop it. He could see right through the so called smile you shot him this morning as soon as you saw him. He knew right then and there that something happened to you during the weekend and when he heard it was all about Yeonjun... he had to contain himself not to beat up his best friend or else the friendship he treasured dearly would crash, fall, and wouldn’t withstand.
However, the truth remained. Little by little, you were shattering due to Yeonjun’s actions and he could only watch helplessly as you flew freely to the ground. It was an understatement to say that he was starting to hate his best friend for doing this to you, but in the end he believed you. If you did it before, then you could do it again right? And you knew that Soobin was always right there for you no matter what.
Last month you gave it your all in order to move on. He truly admired that you kept running and running towards the future even if you felt that there was no end, a quality he secretly cherished of you. As a person, you were strong in your own way and Soobin was proud of you. He just didn’t know how to say it now without making the bright atmosphere droop. It was always like this whenever a problem with your relationship arose. He brought you closer to his arms.
“You’re not weak at all for crying, Y/N. I think you’ve been holding it for too long now. You’re always welcome to come to me, alright? I’ll save you from that stupid Yeonjun and make you happier than he ever has! You deserve someone much better. You and I both know this.”
He wiped your every tear which streamed against your cheek with his thumb gently, and somehow you finally smiled. Ardent, genuine, and sincere, your smile was enough to cause another one of his own towards you, a great deal of blinding happiness all around you. You were sure Soobin was waiting for this after a while, although it came out at a surprising time. You didn’t expect it either.
This was another feeling you couldn’t ever get enough of, for it reminded you of the time when Yeonjun asked you to be his... but comparing it to this wasn’t right at all.
No words were spoken between the two of you, but it really did mean a great deal of comfort to you. How could he offer up this ample amount of support towards you? You made a promise to yourself to make it up to him one day.
A few minutes later, you reluctantly pulled away from his sweet hug to check the time on your phone. You weren’t sure how long you’d been holding each other like this (and you really did enjoy it), but if you kept dawdling then you would miss every single afternoon class. Your eyes scanned through the upper numbers.
Crap. You already missed the first few minutes!
You scrambled to get yourself off him, pulling your bag over your shoulder in a haste. “Wait, I’ll tell you the details later!” You waved your hand for a flimsy goodbye, rushing to get every paper in your bags in check. It was a pathetic bye, that was for sure. You rushed out before Soobin could even mutter a bye, hoping to get there in good time so that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself in front of everyone. Oh, well. You’ll see him later.
Your footsteps faded away little by little and yet another set rippled through his ears through little clacks on the spotless floor. He wondered if you were coming back to ask him something but before he could turn around, sweet words that were due to a familiar tone made his heart stop in place.
“Please, take care of her for me.”
...
Upon hearing that voice Soobin halted in his tracks, looking back at a pair of warm, brown eyes that met his own. By the looks of it, he heard everything you said. Not to mention that it was the second time the boy eavesdropped at that.
“Soobin, please? You can date her even if it hurts but just please... if I can’t look after her, then who else’ll take her to her favorite restaurant?”
The pleas did not matter to him all the more, if he was being honest. This game was something he didn’t want to be involved in but looks like fate had its plans. It was obvious now. He hated this and although he said you deserved better, it was clear that the two of you were destined to be together.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
The door clamorously creaked as soon as you entered, making you cringe at the sudden but minimal heads that turned towards you. You shyly offered up a smile, reorganizing the books in your hands to pass off some of the attention somewhere else. Some of the people there were doing their own things and focused on talking to each other to an extent. You sighed gratefully. Thankfully you could sit alone at a spot where no one would notice you at the top of the row.
After you wondered where the rest of the students were and the professor whom you searched for in every direction, you gave up with a relieving drop of your shoulders and decided to sit down. Glancing at the time, you muttered how stupid you were under your breath for reading the clock wrong. You were fortunately five minutes earlier, but looks like you have to wait now until the lesson starts.
Getting situated in your spot was an easy thing and you toyed with your phone when you heard a shuffling of clothes sitting next to you on the right. It wasn’t such a good time to be socializing right now since you felt like crap but if you were going to make new friends, you might as well do so now. After all, college was supposed to be a good experience minus all the endless assignments and projects to prepare for your future.
You managed to steal a look at the person who sat right next to you but became paralyzed in your spot when you realized who it was, whipping your head where you wouldn’t be able to get distracted by him. That dazzling, blue hair was unmistakable. And the perfect, rosy lips were too! How could you not be tainted when he chose to sit next to you?! Seeing as the latter was impossible when you heard his deep voice murmur the words ‘good morning,’ a bead of sweat collected at your forehead. He was never this bold before after you broke up, and you pondered if he wanted to be good friends again after what happened. The audacity was unbelievable.
You couldn’t understand why he’d choose to be beside you when there were many more other open spots in the room. He must’ve been mocking you, making fun of you after how weak you looked a few days before.
The question was though, why the hell was he sitting right there?! Right next to you?! You could feel the words becoming stuck in your throat as you choked out a good morning back, too anxious to say anything or else it’d initiate a conversation between the two of you. That was the least thing you wanted to do as of now, wasting all your energy on the time spent convincing yourself he’d make up some small talk. That time however never came, and you were left politely smiling at the one and only Choi Yeonjun when you randomly found him staring at you.
The professor finally arrived, lifting off a heavy burden on your chest when you could’ve been dreading the lesson instead. You should’ve left before as to not create any conflict, but anymore absences and your future would’ve been as good as dead. Although you could look at the bright side now! Yeonjun wouldn’t be able to talk to you or else he’d miss some important things which would in turn affect his grades. You threw a grateful smile towards the center of the cavernous room, becoming a little bit relaxed even if some part of you was still freaking out he was that close to you.
The class was a blur, pointless information echoing throughout the room you didn’t care to learn since you were dozing off. Your mind was too busy looking back at the events that went down last weekend, becoming more tired with every second that passed. It was hard to get your brain off that addicting stuff called overthinking every single time you caught Yeonjun staring at you with tender, soft eyes. Simultaneously, you were hoping no one would call you out for daydreaming of what could’ve been, so you hid behind a tall person’s blonde head, hoping not to be caught.
Sadly, you were brought back to the room when a chorus of sighs collected together to make a violin whimper of disappointment.
“You will be working with the person beside you on the right,” the professor declared, clearing their throat while most of the class groaned altogether. Wait so that means...
In an instant, everything seemed way too overheated in the room now. Were you the only one feeling hot or what?! You knew fully what was supposed to come next since you were the only two sitting on the top, the rest of the bottom being filled out by tons of people who were tuning in to the lesson.
Sometimes life doesn’t work the way we want it to. That itself was obvious. Otherwise you’d be somewhere else being happy instead of working with this jerk!
You couldn’t help the frustration of curses you thought in your head, glaring at the boy who was giggling cutely to himself.
“Oh, looks like you’re paired up with me! I can’t wait to work with you, Y/N~” The tone of his voice made your heart skip a beat, the all too familiar teasing getting to your head. As you expected, whatever he said would have an effect on you, instantly making you heat up at how true that statement was.
Smiling, you gulped, feeling too parched all of a sudden. God only knows how much you wanted to get out of there right away. You were dying not to embarrass yourself, collecting your books together as you slathered a polite tone to your voice. Somehow you got the words out despite making clear eye contact with him way too long for your own good. It felt so wrong to say he was a masterpiece but it felt so right to keep looking at him like this.
“Where should we work?” Yeonjun asked once more.
He leaned closer to you, leaning on his hand as he maintained an direct, intent gaze. Your lips formed into a straight line, hopelessly wishing he wouldn’t see how much of a mess you were in front of him. Then he licked his lips. That was the end of you! He and you both knew that it was meant to be flirtatious. Your ears burned at the sight. Well that was enough to be looking at his eyes now! You foolishly turned away.
“Hmm, how about we meet at the bakery everyday at five? Are you okay with that?” Yeonjun suggested, raising an eyebrow to comprehend your unsure expression. You nodded your head acceptingly, albeit a bit defeated. He shouldn’t have been expecting anything. You were fine with whatever place you could meet up by, but didn’t he know that you weren’t fine working with him?!
After the quiet and easily awkward atmosphere, you turned on your heel getting up from the exhausting spot. It was much too uncomfortable for you to plan out a schedule with him, and second you weren’t able to catch the directions with him chatting it up a bunch.
Of course you wanted to be mature about the situation, but it was impossible for you. If it was another person, then you would’ve been fine. You could ask around but that itself was scary too. Your heart was in a tugging predicament with you in between, and you weren’t sure what to choose. Seems like Yeonjun was your only choice now. It would’ve helped you move on but with him right there, it would be harder to really think about yourself for once. You shot him one more look, hoping it would be the last.
“Yeonjun, don’t think you’re fooling me with this flirting. You know I can’t work with you after what you said. I’m sorry, but find someone else who’ll be open to being your partner.” You opted to get up from your seat, trying to dash away as quickly and quietly as possible until he said something that made you paralyzed as you got up.
“Y/N, please wait!”
Suddenly the world stopped and in it, you could only see the two of you with Yeonjun clinging gently to you.
He grabbed your arm before you could move to another seat, holding on tightly just to make you stay. You winced at how warm it was compared to your shaking arm, avoiding his vulnerable eyes due to embarrassment. You didn’t know how you were supposed to do this project anyway when you couldn’t even look at him in the first place.
“I know, and I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have done whatever we did while we were drunk and bothered you like that. Just... can you work with me this once? I want you to get a good grade with me.”
Gradually, his words became inaudible at the end, as if too ashamed to say it out loud. It was an understatement to say what he said was surprising. Therefore you couldn’t help but gasp at how vulnerable he got when you tried to move away from him when you thought he would’ve let you go after what happened. It was clearly too much for you to see his adorable puppy dog eyes, glistening and sparkling with sincerity when you safely decided to look back at him, feeling weak in the knees with uncertainty of what to say.
And although you wanted to say no so badly, you spoke without thinking and murmured something only he could hear.
“Okay then... Let’s do well.”
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
Before you knew it, five pm rolled by and you were face-to-face at the bakery where Yeonjun was waiting for you. At this point, you were reluctant to go through with this since you could easily say you hadn’t found anyone to do the project with. But knowing that the teacher was stubborn and hardheaded when they made plans like these, it would be impossible to convince him to let you work alone. Plus, you actually got ready instead of throwing your favorite hoodie this time! You couldn’t let all your extra effort and special preparing to go to waste just because it was Yeonjun.
And gosh, you just had to remind yourself it was Yeonjun again.
The advances were simple. You had brought all your heavy books relating to the subject, hoping they’d be able to help but now all they seemed to do was weigh you down from getting the door. The wind was heartless, sending icy gusts through your clothes as you heaved out a sigh. It would’ve been good if you just left now instead. But this would only make matters worse. You swiped your phone again, purposely ignoring the contact name of ‘Stupid Mean Jerk Jjuniebug.’ He hadn’t texted you yet saying he was there so you hesitated a tiny bit before reaching for the golden door handle and eventually going inside.
The warm smell of cookies, cakes, and a variety of baked breads welcomed your nose, making the corners of your lips turn up with satisfaction. Out of all the distractions in the world, the Boulangerie was such a perfect place to go to do anything, really. If it wasn’t for your stupid project, you’d probably relax and enjoy a cup of your favorite drink paired with one of the delights they had here! It sounded like flawless idea. Happily, you made a mental memorandum in your head to plan out a day with Soobin where the two of you could hang out and tell stories to each other. He would definitely enjoy this place because of all of the bread you could order.
Surprisingly, Yeonjun was there already and you assumed he was writing something important down due to the determined expression on his face. He furrowed an eyebrow, slightly biting is lip while you inched towards him. You couldn’t help the smile that arose on your cheeks because of how endearing he looked as he worked hard, holding tightly to the books in your arms when you finally came close to him.
He looked up from his little notes of hearts and bunnies he was doodling as soon as a pair of shoes made unpretentious clitter-clacks, eyes lighting up with admiration when he realized that it was you standing there.
“I ordered your favorite dessert while waiting for you. Do you still like it?”
The words got stuck in your throat. He got you something? He must’ve been thinking of your arrival too attentively otherwise there’s no way that was true, but gosh did Yeonjun prove you wrong in a second.
Glancing at the sweets before you paired with a dainty teacup of your favorite drink, a gasp left your lips that embodied awe since he still remembered what you liked to order whenever you came to the Boulangerie with him. The snow white lace of the table fabric created flashbacks in your mind and you tensed up in realization. You hadn’t come here in two months- the last time you were able to picture your last date with him. Although, that wasn’t the point at all.
You were not to be expecting anything after the two of you separated even if the two of you were exes. It was just in Yeonjun’s moral codes in life to be kind to anybody and especially you whenever he please just because it was normal to him. You adored how pure he was, but at the same time you couldn’t shake how he acted towards you almost two months ago. That hostile expression on his face- one you’d never seen before- couldn’t ever be erased from your memory no matter how much effort you put in it.
But the past was the past. No bad things could happen like that now, could it? It was all because the two of you broke up. You were exes.
And yet, you could smile freely like nothing of the sort happened towards the two of you. After all, it was the right thing to do wasn’t it? Yeonjun would’ve wanted you to do that too, you knew it deep inside despite desiring to deny it. To move on and not have any feelings of pent up frustration and anger towards each other. Joy swelled in your heart at how much maturity you were gaining because of heartbreak. Maybe the two of you could be friends. Maybe.
“Thank you so much for doing this even if you didn’t have to, Yeonjun. I’m surprised you even came since your friends are much more interesting than me. I’m glad that you did though.”
You decided to take a bite in the delicacy, immediately not regretting the dulcet decision as you relished in the simple sweetness that came with it. Honestly, you missed this wonderful, mouth watering taste so much! Just like what you remembered, you shut your eyes in pure content, not being able to take in the sight of the boy in front of you who chuckled to himself.
Yeonjun heaved a breath of amusement from his chest, cheek laying down on his hand again as his eyes showed nothing but the sincere feeling of endearment towards you. He shifted comfortably on his side, grabbing one of the crimson, bright strawberries from his plate as he bit onto the juicy tip of it.
“You know, you’re always cute when you smile like that,” he whispered, not caring whether or not you heard it- which you obviously did.
You puffed your cheeks out at this.
“Shut up...! We’re here for a project, remember? Not to... flirt, silly.”
The mischievous yet saccharine grin on his face made you flustered and you glanced away from him, pretending to look at the tray of enclosed desserts that you saw when you first entered the bakery. You couldn’t allow yourself to become distracted like this! Not to mention that looking at him straight through doesn’t seem to help either!
“Oh, but when I look at you I can’t seem to focus on anything else. I’m being serious here; I just really can’t seem to take my eyes off you.”
The slamming yet gentle sound of you slamming the spoon you were holding on the table gave everything away and his eyes turned into euphoric crescents that only signaled delight.
“Yeonjun, I said shut your trap. All these cheesy compliments and I’ll... we have to do our project, so please cooperate and let’s put our work together to actually do something good.” You pulled your books together in a pile, acting as if you were really doing something in order to distract him from teasing you. The raging beat of your heart begged to differ, so you hoped he wouldn’t hear it or else that would give him another reason to make you flustered.  
“As you wish, princess. We’ll work so well together that you’ll miss me once I drop you home!”
Princess...?
He’ll drop you home...?
You groaned in annoyance at the nickname and offer although you kind of enjoyed it, wanting to smack Yeonjun in the mouth for not listening to your request. He must’ve been deaf or something because the whole time he kept throwing coy phrases you’d never heard before or trying to whine about how much work it all was for the two of you.
You were only starting to understand how annoying he was whenever he got cranky and dozed off for thirty minutes, leaving you to search through all those books and gather information yourself which was luckily a lot of help. It was a nice silence for a while but once he got back to annoying you endlessly, you swore you could rip all your hair off from the frustration building up from inside of you.
How were you going to do a week of working with him when you couldn’t even look at him in the eye every time he made pouty, kissing lips? Or take him seriously whenever he called you a pet name for that matter? You wished future you the best luck, unfortunately not knowing what would arrive in the times to come.
...
“Hey, could you look at this for a second? I’m having trouble if I should or more exactly- how I should put this down when it makes no sense.”
You laughed at how clueless he was when it came to his favorite subject, shuffling right beside him to see what he was struggling with. It was too natural, too suspicious for the both of you not to know this. You contained the snickers of mock once you put it all together, silently calling him stupid in your head for not being able to jot down this simple effortless thing. You twisted your body towards the notes, enough for your shoulders to meet together.
Little did you know that Yeonjun only wanted you to come close to him, and it was more than suffice to say it worked out in his favor.
You were explaining everything to him but the only thing he could focus on was the little things about you. The bitty, endearing gestures of your hands while you connected two of the subjects, the way your chest heaved up and down when you took a tiny breath of air, and even how your lips opened and closed was enough for Yeonjun’s fluffy cheeks to heat up and bloom into a rosy red. The words droned off as it echoed between the two of you, easily becoming pointless since he wasn’t paying attention anyway.
A couple of seconds passed between the two of you when the bakery suddenly became silent, and he gripped the pencil he dropped earlier on the table as you shot him a shy smile. Yeonjun’s knuckles became white with every second his stare lingered on you. You were way too cute for your own good, and you didn’t even know it- so why was he surprised? He, too, was hoping you wouldn’t be able to notice the aggressive thumping in his chest.
“Yeonjun? You got all of that, right?” Your symphony-like voice snapped him from out of his trance.
“Okay, then I’ll put that down,” he breathed tiredly.” It looks like he was getting exhausted too, huh? You were about to say a few words of encouragement until he cut you off with his own.
“We’re almost done researching; just hang in there, alright? You’ve been doing so well, Y/N.”
The gentle, supporting words was enough to send ripples through your heart and you nodded your head, all the while checking through what you noted and what you forgot. You wanted to keep thinking about what he said and how it motivated you to keep going. You didn’t want to upset you and most definitely not him. However, the fatigue coating your eyes was too much and you slowly closed the heavy lids, head slowly turning to the side before you fell on something all too familiar.
A sudden yet light weight on his shoulder made him look up from what he was writing down, stunning him in his spot when he saw you had fallen asleep on his shoulder. He must’ve known that this much thinking wore you out after such a long while. A tender smile decorated his lips and he took in your every feature, hoping to draw out the face that made him feel alive.
“She’s so cute...” He grabbed his jacket from the side he’d taken off earlier, laying it gently upon you with his other hand as if it was something he’d done since the beginning of time. You nuzzled your cheek against his way too comfortable shoulder, becoming more snug with each minute that passed by. He couldn’t help the skip in his heartbeat when you muttered his favorite nickname in your sleep, this ‘Jjuniebug’ being much more different compared to the past because he knew you were dreaming of him.
When such a sight like this was to be treasured by anyone, he decided he didn’t want to work anymore. Like the gentleman he was, he gathered your books together, pushing your plate to the side before laying his head against yours. He intertwined your hands with his, grinning gently from ear to ear at the warmness he felt from inside.
He stole one more glance at you, fingers delicately dancing from your cheekbone all the way to your chin, tracing your jaw as gingerly as he could. This was what he was hoping for after such a long time of not receiving it. That itself was rightfully so, yet having you near meant the world and so much more to him.
Then he glanced out the window where rain was drizzling, creating a dreading gray atmosphere which was nothing but chaos. It could’ve been something that alerted him on such a dreary day, making him anxious at how he was going to get home in a mess. But to him, he wouldn’t trade this peaceful present. Always, he wanted to be close to you like this. It couldn’t have been too much to ask, honestly.
“Tell me,” he said to no one in particular, “how can you make a moment last forever?”
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
Tuesday passed as quickly as Monday did and you swiftly got prepared for five pm later. You were bouncing with excitement, ready to see the boy who’d been waiting for you over at the library, a place you decided together when he texted you during lunch break. To be true to yourself, you couldn’t wait to work with him. All day you were waiting for the horrid, slow hours to pass of lectures and countless assignments online, lingering silently through the minutes that seemed to go by forever in hopes that everything would go faster. The relief you felt when you were dismissed for the day and the joy that swelled in your heart when you went home, preparing yourself as best you could.
You didn’t understand why you were buzzing with energy over meeting someone like this, for wasn’t it true the two of you were exes? Two months ago you broke up; that was quite obvious. It didn’t help that and that number one: he was a jerk after a while of dating you, and number two: he was probably playing with your heart if you decided to be smart. But then again you always rewarded that guilty pleasure by saying the past was the past and he bought you your favorite delicacy. He may have hurt you before and because of that, you promised yourself you wouldn’t ever date him ever again.
With that thought in mind you threw your favorite outfit on that you planned just the night before, looking in the mirror twice just to make sure you looked okay. Deep down you knew it was a lie to say you weren’t doing these special things for him, trying to convince yourself that in doing so- this dressing up would do your ego a favor. Yeonjun didn’t have to see this, not at all! It was all because you wanted to look decent. Just that.
So sneakily, you crept out of the house while slipping your shoes on since nobody would notice you were gone. You checked your phone at least twice before opening the door, clearly not ready for the surprising sight your eyes landed upon as soon as you left home.
In front of you was the boy who had taken your mind captive all day, smiling from ear to ear as his fingers combed gently through his blue hair.
You gasped at how he actually came to your house after teasing yesterday that he would, but you never knew he’d carry out his plan. He would keep poking your cheek while saying something under his breath like how he’d visit you one day to pick you up. He would never do that, right? Well no, you were extremely wrong and just a day after your project date went well.
Nonetheless, you couldn’t stop the touched grin on your face to know he was waiting for you.
“Hey, Y/N,” he shyly giggled and that itself made your heart skip a beat, “let’s walk to the library together today, alright? Wait, let me take your books, please!”
Even with your protests and several no’s, he still took your books and placed it snugly against his left arm, teasing about how light they were together. You glared at him for a second before taking a few steps when he suddenly grabbed your hand.
You turned around, eyes wide in a daze.
“What is it?”
An overwhelming heat rose up to your cheeks and ears, making you feel hot in the face as you realized he was still holding on.
“If it isn’t too much to ask, can I hold your hand today? I really miss the warm feeling you gave me last summer.”
He held his hand out expectantly, waiting for you to take it on your own accord. You easily obliged- albeit a bit hesitantly- putting your hand against his and allowing him to guide you to wherever- whenever he wanted. The way his eyes lit up as he lead you to the place was precious, making you feel soft with endearment at how gentle he treated you.
Now this? This was bad. So, so bad.
On the day you left Yeonjun’s house in tears, you weren’t expecting any of this to happen. You weren’t sure how you could trust him so easily after everything he’s done- maybe it was the way you felt his sincerity in every smile he sent you or how tenderly he had grabbed your hand just now, but the happiness bottling up inside you did not lie. You felt pure jubilation whenever you saw him.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
It was Wednesday.
Wednesday, the middle of the school days where you desperately wanted to claw your eyes out from how tedious everything was. Wednesday, a day where nothing significant happened but nothing too horrible happened either. Wednesday, a reminder that you only had two days left- counting today and Thursday- to work with Yeonjun. You hated the bitter taste of having to really say goodbye, but the future had to be on the brighter side then. After this, you swore you wouldn’t ever see him and his damn handsome face for another accidental time.
Just about reaching four in the afternoon, you decided to go with Soobin over to the Boulangerie where you’d been promising yourself to take him since Monday. It was luck on your side today that you actually went out for some fresh air, carrying out some of the awaiting plans you had on your checklist. Sometimes it was nice to have a breather in the middle of the week when everything else was distracting.
It started off as usual, and you realized you hadn’t seen him since that very day of hearing Yeonjun’s offer to be your partner. To be quite honest, you didn’t really think about telling him since it shouldn’t be that important, but the boy knew it was important just by from the hesitance in your expressions. His fingers placed the glass filled with chocolate milk on the table gently and curiously prodded.
“Y/N? You’ve been acting strange lately; is everything okay?”
You glanced up from the china plate, eyes widening with surprise. You weren’t sure what he was talking about. It couldn’t have been anything important, could it? Or were you being so obvious about your giant, giant problem?
“Yeah, everything is fine, Bin! Trust me, there isn’t anything going wrong but I guess you could say that... from your perspective.”
You made sure to look at the way he reacted and seeing how his head titled with wonder, you chose to give it a try.
“Well... I should’ve called you about this but I’m working with Yeonjun for a project. We have to turn it in by Friday, but we’ve been doing stuff on it since Monday. It doesn’t mean anything though, and we’re supposed to meet up at the park (Moonlight) today.” You intentionally left out the fact he asked you and those sweet moments since you were afraid of his reaction.
You knew he was one to be respectful and kind no matter the person, although because of all this tugging back and forth between his best friends- you couldn’t blame him for wanting to sock either one of you for being so stupid. And stupid were you and Yeonjun for not being able to get enough of each other, at least that’s how you viewed it. Soobin wouldn’t dare to hurt either one of you since the two of you were best friends; physically wouldn’t cut it. You hoped he would just remain patient like he’d always have- one thing you were grateful for, obviously, instead of freaking out at the recent moments you’ve experienced.
That being said, the look on Soobin’s face was absolutely priceless once you told him about your predicament.
“You two? On a project? TOGETHER?!”
Glumly you nodded your head, expecting him to say something but his mouth was filled with shock to the brim that he couldn’t even bring himself to say anything.
“Yup, that’s true. You didn’t know about it?” To say the least, you were surprised he didn’t know about it since Yeonjun was one to trust him about everything. Little things like this would count, yes, and you could very vividly remember how he blabbed to Soobin when you first started dating about how to keep a girl on her period happy.
In response, he shook his head, hand still glued covering his mouth. Your lips slightly turned upwards at his melodramatic feedback.
“No, he didn’t tell me anything at all about it! Why are you guys keeping secrets from me?”
Ouch, that stung. But at the same time, what were you expecting?
“That’s a surprise. I thought he couldn’t keep his mouth--”
The deafening, shuffling sound of the store bell rang throughout your ears, causing you to shudder at the intermittent sound. This was a popular Boulangerie so you didn’t need to be surprised whenever a new customer came in, but it stunned you at the worst times. You shrugged at Soobin’s suddenly ghost white reaction, thinking he was just kidding with you again and went back to the cup of a refreshing drink. Honestly, you couldn’t care less about it unless it was someone you knew.
You lifted the cup to pass through your lips until the familiar sight of messy radiant, blue hair caught the peripheral vision of your eye.
It had to be him. It couldn’t be anyone else.
“Y-Yeonjun...?”
As your heart dropped to your stomach, your voice broke out gently, making you the only person to hear it muffled with both distress and disbelief. There was no possible way you were witnessing what was happening in front of you. You didn’t want to believe it, squinting your eyes over and over again just to get a good look. It was still him no matter what you did, no matter what you changed.
Somehow, he didn’t notice you.
He sat down at a table, sending a sugary smile towards an alluring girl who sent him the same one back. Your back became rigid at the too close proximity of their faces. They chatted for a little bit about anything that could cross their minds, obviously flirting with the stares sent back and forth and back again until it turned into a full discussion- both of them laughing their hearts out. Happiness from the ideal ‘couple’ (as anyone could’ve mistaken them) spread around the Boulangerie contagiously, making everyone awe at the sight of them fully enjoying themselves. But you? You? Your heart shattered piece by piece while watching this play out.
Too many questions flooded in your mind at once as well as too many insecurities, paralyzing you in your spot as you couldn’t find the correct way to breathe again. It was getting too hard to find the air in, you realized. Soobin called your name out many times- to get you to listen, to get you out of your stupid trance, to get you to do anything else in the world but look because it’d hurt you just as much as it did for him!
To this, you were only sitting still, staring and staring like a dormant painting hanging in a museum just to find out that you wouldn’t ever be able to change anything, but only see the people in front of you. You didn’t want to look at the face of pain in front of you but... if you looked away then something else might happen.
You cradled yourself in your arms, trying to stop the icy cold breeze that whirled pass your rips and over to the tips of your toes. It didn’t make sense to you. Why even bother putting effort into winning him back? You wouldn’t be able to be as good enough. You shouldn’t have even tried in the first place.
You gulped down those insecurities again, trying to calm your shaking hands.
It wasn’t possible to be that perfect... not at all. She was such a stunning girl, the epitome of everything you weren’t and what you didn’t have. She had such sparkling eyes, such a gorgeous smile, and not to mention an impeccable complexion that had every single girl in the world jealous. Everything about her was simply perfect and that drowned your own specialties into the deepest ocean called hatred.
Once again you glanced at Yeonjun who seemed to be having fun with the deep chuckles and smiles he was freely giving up. Oh, how bad you wanted it to be you but this reminder was one that gave you a wake up call. You never really had a chance in the first place.
He then turned his head a little to the side, ultimately being able to see you sitting next to Soobin just like you had planned. His honeyed brown eyes changed from smug into something unreadable you couldn’t put your finger on before changing in a split second to look back at the girl.
The decision dawned on you, and you clenched your fists until you felt flashing, white pain run through your fingers.
He didn’t even care.
You were stupid enough to believe he actually liked you back again. You were stupid enough to think that with all these sweet interactions and words, he was warming up to you for another countless time. You were stupid to think he was being truthful that drunken night, saying he needed you clearly as much as you needed him. Finally, you were stupid enough to think he loved you. Now the proof was smack dab in your face, blinding you from your goal of hating him, and you were such a fool to be thinking he would really be yours after such a long while.
The glossy tears gathered in your eyes, angry, frustrated but pointless words with no explanation becoming more stuck in your throat when you glanced once more at the sight across from you. Time passed by through the regal clock, ringing in an ear and out the other. One way or another, you needed to get out of there and you needed it to be now.
You hastily slung your bag filled with papers over your shoulders, making sure you hid the flowing tears from everyone’s sight. Just one turn and he’d probably see you so pitiful at the wrong time. You certainly didn’t want to look pathetic, especially not in front of Yeonjun, whom you still loved with all your heart.
In a dash, you aggressively swiped the entrance of the door handle and into the day where you just wanted to disappear. Bell ringing haphazardly behind you, you weren’t able to perceive you were out of the bakery until another customer ignored your everblooming sadness, struggling behind you to get the door. Tears soon fell on the ground after holding them in for too long, signaling your vulnerability as you crouched down behind the bakery to let everything keeping your heart captive out. This time, for real, you really weren’t going to see him again even if it meant your grades being obliterated.
You hated him. You hated him so much for what he did back there.
And yet here you were, running away from your problems again.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
“Y/N?”
It was a mistake. It was all a mistake. You shouldn’t have pressed accept without looking at the contact name. You were just so stupid that it was funny. Just another one of the reasons why he wouldn’t ever want to date you again. How could you blame him for breaking up with you?
“Y/N, you there?”
He was seeing another girl, you should’ve known. Why didn’t you know? Why did you have to be such a fool to be used in the first place? And why the hell were you sad about it when you could be using this opportunity to be getting over him?!
“Y/N, you’re not responding and I’m getting worried. Is there something I can do? Please...?”
You were just exes. Exes, for crying out loud! Exes. That’s all.
“Y/N, if you’re there just-”
“yeah, I’m right here,” you murmured quietly, caring any less that he might have not heard you in the end. If he was able to really see how you accidentally looked at him earlier, then surely he would’ve known how the world crashed on your shoulders just by looking at you. Oh, but it was funny wasn’t it? It didn’t matter anyway. After all, he wouldn’t give a damn right? Not what he did back there he wouldn’t.
Because of that, you realized that this conversation with him was not needed. Whether it was because of the project or if it was for a favor, you wouldn’t be able to do it without looking weak in his eyes. Your finger hovered over the red button, tempted to press hang up until again, his act of using a concerned voice tugged painfully on your heart strings.
“Wait, are you okay? Do you need me to be there? Something’s wrong, I know you’re not okay,” he tried for another time, breathing through the call tiredly as if he was oblivious to what went on earlier. The hate for him smoldered in your chest, and your fingers tightened around the phone so arduously that they turned white, shaking hysterically.
“No, I...” you felt your voice break, and you covered the change in pitch by clearing your throat. With the lump so gigantic that you couldn’t even breathe, it hurt to tell him a lie, much less speak at that moment. You put on a tone to make it more believable. “Everything’s fine. Just busy right now.”
“You’re lying,” he whispered so softly into the receiver you were wondering yourself if you had heard him in the first place. You forced yourself to laugh at his statement, but it came naturally, knowing it was all too true.
“I’m not lying, I promise! I just took a nap, that’s all. No need to be so worked up over me.” You figured that teasing him would be the best way to cover up your sorrow, giggling alongside him because you were so bad at lying. Nonetheless, you hoped he would take this approach, waiting silently on the floor for his best answer.
On the other side he hummed hesitantly, mumbling a few words that you couldn’t quite comprehend because you knew he didn’t want to hear them. You barely noticed you were in the corner holding yourself, rocking back and forth as the anticipation of just hanging up crept up on you.
Before you could start, Yeonjun grumbled in concern.
“Well... okay then. But if you really want to convince me you’re fine then you’ll keep your promise and meet at Moonlight today. We still have a lot to do, so let’s meet up at the usual time. You’ll be there, right?”
“Um... I...”
What else could you say? It would be rude to decline and you weren’t in the mood to lie after all that. Well, he didn’t buy it all but at least he got off the topic. You were thankful to him for not budging, although this had to be one of the worst things he could ever suggest. Not only about how you feel in the end but about the project too. As far as you were concerned, you only a little left so you were able to work separately anyway. He didn’t have to go so far to do things his way, but this would show you he didn’t need you at all.
You spoke on impulse hastily after the long, deafening silence.
“Yeah, okay. S-see you then.”
Abruptly, you hung up before the tears could start again. Not even letting him throw in a sincere goodbye to your predicament.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
Just like what you remembered, Moonlight was still a breathtaking place where the golden sun shone during the day and the moon peeked out from the dim curtains of nighttime. You sighed, staring longingly at the beautiful scenery before you and sat down under one of the trees. It’d been so long since you chose to come here, especially by yourself this time. There were happy memories that came along with this place and you didn’t want to think about the bad ones, of course. However everywhere you looked, it would only remind you of him and that was the least thing you wanted to have at the back of your mind right now.
Checking the time, you made sure you didn’t arrive too early or too late. It was a few minutes after five and true to your word, you actually came. You were surprised at yourself for showing up voluntarily with your mind in such a bad condition, acting as if you were okay just for a stupid project. If you’d done this earlier, you would’ve definitely said no. Perhaps it was the way he was worried about you- although, you thought it was fishy- that you wanted to come. Maybe then you would’ve gotten the attention you wanted after all this time, with this being the final time you’ll see him.
Eventually, you saw the familiar blue haired boy arrive just a quarter after your planned time. He was panting heavily and you swore you almost felt bad for him until the image of him catching eyes with you from earlier rearranged your thought process by miles. You stood up expectantly as he ran over to you, planting his hands on his knees in order to regain breath.
“So sorry for being late, Y/N,” he choked out restlessly, taking your hands into his as an apology. He held them tightly in place, squeezing in an attempt to excuse himself for why he was late. Instantly you gasped at the contact, slowly pulling away so that he wouldn’t realize that you more or less hated his affection. At times when you’d be melting at this, you failed to realize that your suspicions were true and he was playing you behind your back.
A tight lipped smile that screamed passive-aggressiveness became of your lips and you were eager to take a few steps away from him, shuffling to get under the spot you sat earlier. You backed away a little bit but weren’t able to get far because your shoes slipped from something shaped like a square underneath you. The breath was knocked off your lungs as you fell towards the ground and you plunged back, waiting to hit the ground. That is, until someone caught you by the waist.
You opened your eyes after a few seconds of waiting and as soon as you did... you felt all the blood rush up into your face.
“Y-Yeonjun...”
You weren’t expecting anything like this. Nothing sweet like this at all! Said boy was intently gazing at you, holding you by the waist as you were too shocked to say or hell- even do anything with him this close. Your head tilted away to the side this time, trying to think of anything else that would stop the intermittent pace of your heart beats. Gossiping with Soobin about what happened just now, the way you fell at school a few years earlier and embarrassed yourself and how he helped you up out of everyone else right after, the first moment you laid eyes on him and met the blue haired boy just like that... But no, all you could think of was him, him, and only him!
He seemed to be getting a kick out of this, teasing you with an adorable smile that had you awestruck.
“Were you scared...? Don’t worry about it anymore; I’ll always be here to catch you when you fall, I promise.”
It was then that he started to lean in after chuckling at your shyness, bringing your face closer to his as his eyes ran across yours. Your breath quickened just by looking back at him turn towards you- his gorgeous eyelashes that you felt the need to count each, his nose that was sculpted by the angels, his cherry blossom pink lips you so desperately needed- memorizing every valley on his face as you had done earlier when the two of you dated. Oh wait, dated...?
In a moment, you flung yourself off him. What were you doing with him?! Whatever this was and whatever he was doing- it wasn’t right! It just wasn’t right... It wasn’t right when he was choosing to see someone else, and that girl back there no matter how much you couldn’t help but despise her- did not deserve it. It wasn’t right.
Your legs felt like jelly, unable to stand by yourself as you carried out an attempt to get away from him. It didn’t seem so long ago that you couldn’t get enough of him but now you were itching to be left alone. You wanted to deal with this yourself, not reignite the fire of the hopes that he would return back. He lost that chance and you lost the chance of loving him again- even if yes, you still did love him. It was enough for you anyway- the love he gave you before only serving as a unreachable memory. You realized you needed to relinquish him.
Immediately you pushed him off you, watching the sweet expression on his face bend into something broken. The distance between you became even farther and farther with every breath your chest heaved. You gulped.
“I’m fine. Let’s just get to work so we can finish this,” you deadpanned, bringing your books that used to be laying dormant on the green grassland against your chest, moving under the tree where he broke up with you. This way you would be able to remind yourself that it wasn’t meant to be.
Surprised by your ill nature, Yeonjun nodded carefully, deciding to ponder in his head what was making you act this way instead of asking more questions. There was obviously something wrong, but he didn’t want to bother you more. To him he was unable to think of what he had done wrong and certainly hated the tense atmosphere when you refused to touch him, much less look at him. He just went along with it unknowingly like a fool that it was because of him the whole time.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
It was too hard to concentrate.
Your eyes searched despondently over the materials over and over and over again to write down something- anything that could possibly benefit the project, but it didn’t help at all that your mind was still on the boy sitting in front of you. Like a mantra, the memories of him smiling with that flawless girl kept replaying in your head as many more times as you bit by bit became insane with wrenching love.
Again, you couldn’t help but steal another glance at him before quickly ducking back down so he wouldn’t be able to catch you staring. He looked so peaceful while retracing his steps in the books, laying on his hand as a stand for his cheek. You hated how he could act so fine while you were left with nothing but hate towards him. Could you even call it hate anyway? It wasn’t true at all.
Yeonjun’s soothing voice snapped you out from your daze of pity, but it did the least to heal you and your pathetic attitude.
“Hey, do you think we could rest a second? I might fall asleep here if we have to keep reading about this nonsense stuff.”
You didn’t look up from your book, allowing him easy access to rest on your shoulder as silently as he could. His heart leaped with joy in his chest, but there was no chance he’d ever say it out loud. He graciously laid his head down upon it, becoming enamoured with your scent as he reached out to touch your hand. This need of affection easily leveled the desire which screamed out he needed you, but he wasn’t sure if he’d ever get an opportunity to be yours again.
You, on the other hand, was dying to tell him you loved him- but it wasn’t right when he simply had the same love as you for another girl.
But at the same time, you wanted to be strong. You had to be strong in order to convince him you were doing fine without him even if the truth was far from that. You had to put on a mask to hide the pain you were going through just because of him and his stupid, contagious smile that makes you grin every time you see it. You had to be strong, otherwise you’d never fool him that you needed him more than anything or anybody you’ve ever wanted. You had to be strong... but why were all your actions simply betrayed you no matter what you did?
“Get off me.”
Your shoulders started to shake aimlessly, shuddering when you felt his head bury more into the crook of your skin. He must’ve not heard anything, and you clenched your jaw until it twitched with pain.
“I said, get off me!”
As hard as you could, you pushed him off you- enough that you were just inches apart from him. It didn’t compare to the distance between you that you came to note before.
The tears were hot against your cheeks and you collapsed into your shaking hands, unable to hold it in anymore. In all your life, you’ve never felt so humiliated before just because a boy lied to you willingly. You felt pathetic.
To say the least, Yeonjun was taken aback, his eyes wide with shock as he hopelessly reached out his hand to you. All the love you bore just for him crashed into waves upon your chest, and you slapped his fingers away harshly before he could even say something.
Miserably you hid your face from him, not allowing him to see such a mess that he caused by his own hands.
“Who even are you? Are you the Choi Yeonjun who broke up with me or are you someone else?! I don’t understand how you can act like this after everything that happened... tell me, are you just playing with me or something?”
“Y/N, that’s not what I meant to do...” he tried tiredly, scooting closer to no avail as you turned your back away from him.
You laughed at his words, still not being able to look at him straight in the eye.
“Not what you meant to do? You’re telling me that it’s not what you meant to do?! Then who- who was she? Because it seemed to me that you were happier with her than you could’ve ever been with me!”
The silence that broke you apart was too deafening as you caught another look at him.
“Y/N, that’s not true... just listen, please,” Yeonjun begged, gazing at you desperately with unreadable but melancholy expression that had you on edge. He knew that you wouldn’t stay if he physically bound you in his embrace, but he had no clue what to do or what to say. He just wanted- no, needed you to really live.
Your heart broke all the more at the words he tried to pick up in order to explain- which you were sure he could hear even if he seemed very far. Easily you trashed his attempt away, getting up from your spot since you didn’t want to hear anything- anymore lies that would hurt the person you tried so hard to protect and shield away from the inevitable demise of love... that was you.
Yeonjun hurriedly got up along with you, leaving the pile of your books abandoned on the floor as he rushed out to match your pace. He ran with all his might to catch up with you but every time he reached your side- you would push him away like earlier and he didn’t have time to find his breath.
“Yeonjun, leave her alone. Haven’t you done enough, already?”
Seconds later upon hearing another voice, you rushed to someone else’s side, hoping that he would be able to protect you from the danger. It was pitiful with you standing right behind him as if that would help, but it did more than what you could ever be grateful for.
Yeonjun tensed up at his spot, stunned to see Soobin when he could’ve sworn nobody else was at Moonlight. In his mind, he could see the two of you right there apart from everything else- the two friends that looked so good together... it had to be much better than him after what he’d done. He came to a thought, letting his guard down while words of Soobin asking too many questions towards you occupied his head.
“I knew it. I knew you two were dating. I-I should’ve known,” he mumbled under his breath, his morals paralyzing him in place as he dropped his gaze towards at the ground instead.
Somehow Soobin heard this muttering and smugly smirked at this silly situation, taking a fresh opportunity that could probably boost destiny’s way before hiding it with a deep frown. He pulled you flush against his chest, holding you when you surprisingly really needed it from someone else.
“You finally figured this out? Leave us alone; you lost your chance the minute you broke up with her, pal.”
As Soobin dragged you along, you took one last look towards Yeonjun and gasped when you saw along with yours- two longing eyes flowing with tears that were nothing short of love. You wanted to reach out to help him not to cry like that even if he hurt you, but it would never work out and he’d leave you just like he’d done before. This only showed that you weren’t meant to be, never in a million years.  
And with that you left with the help of Soobin, leaving Yeonjun alone at Moonlight. Time passed to the point where he gazed upon the stars- wishing that you would come back because he wanted to say he still loved you- by himself.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
It was Thursday, the final day where the two of you would ultimately finish this project. The death of having an obligation which ripped your heart out, for better or for worse. The demise of whatever love you shared. The end of seeing him because you really wanted- no, you needed to. Everything was over in a blink of an eye and you were left feeling bittersweet about the situation... more bitter compared to sweet because you wanted more time with him. You knew deep down inside it wasn’t too much to ask, but... ending this would be for the better. It must be.
You were on your usual pathway home from the library after trying to bribe the librarian to excuse you from losing your books (when you actually accidentally left it there with him) while along the way thinking about what to do to make a grand finish for the project. Since the two of you worked on it a lot for a few hours before you exploded on him- something you weren’t sorry for in the least bit because it got your feelings out- it was safe to say that he wouldn’t bother you about it anymore. He finished his side, you were assuming, so he didn’t have to see you for the time being unless he ever decided to talk it out with you. Other than the fact that you totally hurt him back there, it honestly served you a great victory on a silver platter as you waited for the dragged out day to be over.
It was petty, of course it was! But after what he did back there at the Boulangerie while not to mention, make eye contact with you- sweet revenge had to be one of the best tastes a connoisseur could ever call upon.
And the project? Oh yeah, that’s right. It was a good thing that it was the final day so you wouldn’t have to act civil with him, for better or for worse.
After a few more blocks finally, you made it home, causing you to sigh out in relief. Hurriedly you grabbed your keys from your purse, fumbling with several of them to find the one that fit perfectly. The familiar touch never came though, and you groaned loudly, cursing yourself in your head for forgetting it in the library. It was when you set it down next to the book you were reading before you confronted the librarian- poor old woman- and somehow, you forgot to pick it up the second you got up.
Great, now this.
You opted to stare at the horizon in front of you, letting the breeze freely cool down your body. The sight was nothing less than pretty. It was a windy, golden sunny day outside but you didn’t want anything to do with it. All day you were planning to mope around the house and watch your favorite shows, procrastinating ‘til the last minute until the due date of every assignment arrived. They hit differently whenever you grabbed a bag of chips downstairs to finish them along with the homework, and you giggled at every moment that flashed in your head.
There was nothing else better to do but call Soobin, right? Although you didn’t want to bother him because these months have definitely been annoying for him whether he said it or not.
Defeated, you then stared down into the white porch as if it was at fault, feeling fear rise up your throat. What were you going to do? There was no one else you had given the key to, except...
“Y/N? Can we talk?”
Oh, no. Oh, no... Oh no no no!
When you heard that voice you were instantly glued to that spot, feet affixed on the porch as your heart beat too fast for its own good. Your mind must’ve been hallucinating and playing tricks on you; clearly you weren’t ready to see him yet!
Swiftly you moved your head to the side, eyes widening with appall to see that he was actually right there. Expression nothing less than sorrow, hair messed up and fluffy right in front of his eyes, cherry blossom lips curved into a trembling frown: it was Yeonjun, alright, but yet it was someone you couldn’t recognize due to the complete change of attitude in him. He was tightly holding onto your books but seemingly refusing to hand them over as if that would do anything better and increase the need for conversation. Unlike his stiff posture, his eyes held firm intent though, and you quivered at the determination sewn in them.
“Do you need anything?”
Instead of acting childish like you played out in your head, you simply responded it a curt voice because it was better than saying nothing and benefiting the sworn silence. More than anything you wanted to get out of there and leave the awkward tension, but there was nothing else you could possibly do without embarrassing yourself due to the fact you lost your keys.
“I... I...” This time, he avoided your eyes, words caught in his throat as he couldn’t find the exact thing to say. It wouldn’t make things any better, you realized. It just wasn’t meant to be.
You pursed your lips, locking them into a line. Whatever he had to say- it didn’t matter. Plus, there was another thing. As your eyes were already tearing up, it would be hard to stay for long to listen to his words. There was no telling what you’d say if tears automatically streamed down your cheeks.
“If you don’t have anything to say, then I’ll l-leave. We can just work on the project separa-”
Clack!
Clack!
Clack!
Before you could even stay true to your words, Yeonjun took slow steps towards you that had you walking backwards... without you looking.
Soon enough your back hit the door, and you gasped at the close proximity between the two of you now as he leaned in. His hands reached out to cage you in between his arms, tilting his head to the side to study your reaction. The soft blue hair brushed against the top of your head- showing how dangerously close he was. His breath fanned across your lips and his heavenly cologne infiltrated your sense of smell. If he decided to torture you even more, then you’d be able to touch noses from how near he was.
Look, you weren’t sure how to describe it at that moment other than- he was pinning you to the damn wall?! Suddenly you felt all the blood rush in your face, and it was then that you couldn’t make eye contact with him anymore- especially because he’d see how embarrassed you were! He didn’t have to be that close!
“yes, I need something. Or more specifically, you.”
His voice was much more huskier than you remembered it to be, and his eyes fell upon yours, begging for you to look back if not for your anxiety that he was this close. You immediately shut your eyes, heart beating erratically in your chest even if you tried to stop it by focusing on something else. But Yeonjun... how could you not think of anything else but him?! He was nothing short of breathtaking but seeing him this close and personal... it didn’t do good things for your heart!
“M-me?”
It was obvious that the boy was amused even if he felt guilty about the problem, making a quick exhale through his nose to show entertainment. His chuckle that came heartily through his chest caused your ears to heat up with shame since it showed how weak you were- just for him.
“Yes you, you silly baby,” he cooed endearingly, “who else could it be?”
“You’re one to be calling me silly! Don’t pretend like you were the one the other day who asked if frogs have blood!”
In a split second, his face morphed into something nothing less than serious and his left arm dropped to his side. You couldn’t help but wonder at the duality he managed to have when the gravity of the situation hit him.
“I miss things like this. I miss it so much. I miss joking around with you and chasing you around the house just to tickle you. I miss how attached you were because little did you know, I was just as much attached to you as you were to me.
“I miss the sweet look you give me every time I ask you out on a date. I miss having you right beside me whenever we studied together because you were the only person who cheered me on even when it was two in the morning. I miss giving you random kisses out of nowhere because I can’t get enough of you and that adorable, surprised face whenever I did so.
“I miss slipping my hand into yours whenever we would walk home together, letting you cling onto me so that I could protect you from all dangers. I miss giving you victory every argument we had because I hate making you cry. I miss cuddling you on the couch as we watched our favorite shows together whenever we were too lazy to get up and how I couldn’t stop smiling every time you laughed.
“I miss kissing the top of your forehead and you never knew because you were asleep. I miss waking up with you by my side and seeing something so gorgeous it would stay in my head all day even if I studied the same materials over and over again. I miss looking up at the stars with you at Moonlight and resting my head on your lap as you ran your fingers through my hair and how we’d do it every single week.
“Can’t you see? I miss you and every little thing you do, simple or exquisite. I know why you acted that way yesterday and I hate myself so much for not realizing it until later. I owed her something after she told me a way to somehow get closer to you when I’d done such a horrible thing. You can love Soobin- I don’t care about myself anymore as long I get to see my favorite girl smile due to the fact that she’s in love.
“Y/N, you mean much more to me than anything and it’s okay if you’re happy not loving me again because at least I got to experience the full joy and sadness that visited along with the love of my life. This may be the last time you may ever want to see me, but please... let me tell you how much I need you one last time.”
His eyes were shining, full of sincerity that you were able to feel even if you weren’t him. Tears resembling glistening pearls streamed down with his cheeks as he finally told you the truth he’d been dying to tell you, allowing you to see his vulnerabilities inside out. And yet, he was genuinely smiling as he confessed this, happy enough he got the chance to tell you loved you one last time.
Gradually he extended his arms out wide, allowing you to have your personal space while he took a few steps backwards and towards the grass where you followed him. By the end of it all, you weren’t able to help the tears welling up in your eyes at how touched you were from the inside. It was him, the boy who promised to love you until the end of time.
“Y-Yeonjun, I...” he cut in through your words, closing his eyes in fear of the pain that would soon become of his body if you did in the end, choose to grant his wish. It simply wasn’t enough to level the agony of his heart, but he was willing to take all the pain instead of burdening it on you.
“I’ll let you push me. I’ll let you hit me. I’ll let you get back what you deserve. You can slap me, as long as you let everything out. I don’t want you to hurt anymore because of me, so just do it!”
...
...
...
Silence.
Oh, the euphoric relief coursing in your veins that really pushed you over the edge.
Immediately you threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him as tightly as you could because you never wanted to let go. You melted into his embrace upon contact, burying your head against his chest that was warm and overflowing with passion. Yeonjun hesitantly embraced you back, unsure of what happened just now.
You couldn’t help but giggle at his dumbfound expression.
“You silly baby,” you teased, repeating his playful words from earlier, “I’m not dating Soobin and I never have. Why would I date him when I’ll never love this way again?”
You booped his nose as quickly as you could, smiling when he finally reciprocated the same grin back.
“Choi Yeonjun, you were such a fool to lose me, but I’m even more of a fool to love you again. I’ve never stopped loving you, although I’m sure you already knew that, hEY-”
With happiness overflowing the boy, he picked you up and you were swept off your feet in a second. Wide smiles reflected back and forth from his face to yours as he spun you around him a few inches from the ground, pure bliss surrounding the two of you since you both were complete again. He let you laugh in his hands, tickling your sides unintentionally while you snickered at him to let you down. He only chuckled at this, stopping in place but still refusing to listen to your request.
“I love your very big brain that’s so smart it makes me frustrated with how dumb I am sometimes,” he brought you down a little bit to kiss your forehead. He then trailed down to your nose.
“I love how you ask me for opinions of perfume when you know deep down instead I adore your natural scent instead,” he kissed your nose and you laughed at the feeling it naturally gave you.
“But most importantly,” Yeonjun placed you down on the golden grasslands again and ceased right in front of your lips, letting his breath fall upon them, “I love you.”
Then he connected your lips together, bringing you closer towards him than he had ever done before.
At last, everything was finally perfect.
«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»
Posted: 3/29/21- 1:37am (yes i did stay up halfway to two am just to get this finished. priorities people- it’s just a sweet early monday here 😔🧍)
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hwangsies · 4 years
Text
LIMERENCE
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(n) the state of becoming infatuated with another person
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pairing: hyunjin x female reader
summary: you haven’t spoken a word to hyunjin since he ghosted you after a fun new years eve together, so what’s the worst that could happen when fate (or chaeryong,...well, same thing) pairs you up for a road trip across the country?
warnings: e2l (ish), university student!au, non idol!au ,a lot of swearing. alcohol consumption,long flashback, mentions of infidelity, hyunjin is a giggly sweetheart, smut as in: dom!hyunjin, unprotected sex (wrap it up luvs),fingering, oral (f recieving), slight choking, praise kink, hand & strenght kink (manhandleing oopsie), slight overstimulation, hyunjin is really enthusiastic about consent (as you should be, periodt), reader is nervous and scared of hyunjins big pickle (ew i hate myself), motel sex (but it’s not trashy i promise!)
8.6 k words ,meaning grab a snack and a drink,
and enjoy!<3
---
"alright everyone" your professor rubs his hands together "that was it for today... i hope you all have a great break and i'm very exited to see all of you again next semester. hopefully in person again" he chuckles.
You and your classmates exchange goodbyes with him before one after the other exits the zoom call.
"fuck" you sigh after closing your laptop and lean back on your bed.
"you did it girl" your dormmate chaeryong claps, at which you giggle before shifting your eyes to her on the other side of the room.
She's sitting on her bed, folding her clothes before putting it in her suitcase thats placed in front of her.
"finally" you sit up and watch her roll up a pair of socks.
"my last class was yesterday and mrs kim teared up" she giggles "it was kinda cute not gonna lie"
"oh god" you snicker.
"hey did you find someone to take to yongin?" you ask, remebering chearyong talking about wanting to find someone to share gas expenses with in exchange for a ride to her hometown.
"oh yea, i did" she turn to you "i think you know him, seo changbin?"
You furrow your brows in thought, you feel like you've heard of the name.
"he's a music major, one year above us, hes also from yongin" she continues folding a pair of jeans "funny you'd ask actually cause he told me one of his friends was looking for a ride to seoul, isn't that where you're going?"
"Yea i was thinking about finding someone honestly because gas is really fucking expensive if you aint rich" you say, placing your laptop onto your nightstand.
"Mm you aint gotta tell me girl" chaeryong mumbles, folding a sweatshirt.
"so who's that friend?" you ask, stretching out on your bed.
"he's in his grade, hyunjin"
Your neck almost cracks from how fats you whip your head “hwang hyunjin?”
"Oh yea" she points at you "you know him?"
"unfortunately" you huff.
"o-oh, what"s the tea?" your roommate wiggles her brows at which you shake your head.
"nothing much really" you sigh, leaning back again "he's just like the most arrogant and stuck up fuckboy ever"
"wow, well thats not nothing" chaeryong laughs "any reason as to why you think that?"
"you could probably ask any girl on campus and she'll tell you the same" you scoff.
"really girl?" chaeryong squints an eye at you playfully "cause i've only heard of him being hot but never of him being a hoe. And you know i'm the first to know the hot gossip" she winks.
Laughing defeatedly, running your hand through your hair.
"it's just- we hit it off at the campus' new years eve party, like really hit it off- at least thats what i thought"
"oooh spill it spill it" chaeryong leaps over to your bed to sit at the end of it.
"well there's really not much to spill, i gave him my number and he was talking all that smack about taking me out and stuff aaand to make a long story short i never heard from him again"
"well" chaeryong speaks slowly, biting her lip guiltily "i dont think you'll be very happy about me giving changbin your number for him, then?"
"you did what???" your eyes almost pop out of your head.
"sooorryy" she jumps up from your bed, clutching her hands apologetically "i didnt know"
"aaaaarghh" you whine, burying your face in your pillow.
"maybe he won't even text you though" chaeryong tries to console you, but the damage is already done...
-
unknown number - hey i got this number from changbin, i heard you're driving up to seoul, i'd love to tag along if you're looking for someone to share expenses with -recieved at 9:12 am
You huff looking at the message on your phone.
After chaeryong had left last night you really convinced yourself that he couldn't possibly dare to reach out to you.
But here you are reading his message after just waking up, and your day is already ruined.
you - who is this? - sent at 9:56 am
You know who it is, but you're not going to give him the satisfaction of thinking that you do.
Scoffing when he answers almost immediately.
unknown number - this is hyunjin, did i reach the right person? - recieved at 9:57 am
You have two choices at this point.
1. be petty and bitter about a boy who probably doesn't even remember you.
Or 2. move on and help someone who is also just trying to get home and also maybe get some closure.
So you curse your mother for rasing you so well and suck it up.
you - yea sure, i planned on leaving tomorrow at around 6 pm - sent at 10:02 am
Damn you and your common human decency.
he sus - oh okay great :) i only have one suitcase and a backpack btw so i wont take up alot of space or anything - recieved at 10:05 am
he sus - also i feel weird bc i dont know ur name or anything changbin literally just sent me the number and nothing else lol, also 6 sounds good should we meet at the main building then? -sent at 10:06 am
You're quite honestly not shocked that he seems nice over text because he was the same when you met on new years eve.
you - sure lets meet at the main building, my car is white and my name is y/n - sent at 10:09 am
Cringing as you press the send button because you are 99% certain he won't answer anymore; not that you'd care, obviously.
he sus - alright y/n see you tomorrow at 6 then :) - recieved at 10:14 am
You raise your brows when your phone lights up with his message, does he really not remember you?
Was he that drunk?
Well, it doesnt matter because you don't want to pay for all this gas alone and he seems to be the next best option to fix that.
So you shrug it off and get out off bed to run some last errands and start packing.
-
Your heart is beating unreasonably fast when you take a turn towards the main building at 5:55 pm the next day.
Calm down y/n it’ll just be 5 hours and who says you have to talk to him?
However you do know deep in your heart that you only wanted to arrive just a little early so you could complain about him being late.
That plan got cut short because your eyes fall on him as you pull up to the main building.
He’s- oh my god he’s blonde. You stop your car and he looks up at you.
“it is you!” hyunjin smiles at you when you step out of the car.
“who else would it be?” you ask, a little irritated at his reaction.
His face drops a bit when he sees you clearly annoyed by him, but the doesn’t blame you; he’d be mad too.
You open your trunk for him to put his weirdly small suitcase into, looking him up and down as he lifts it inside.
He’s wearing dark baggy pants and a windbreaker jacket, the top part of his chin-length blonde hair is pulled back into a messy ponytail.
He seemed to have bulked up as well, shoulders looking broader than what you remember.
The hair is different than the jet black hair that you remember on him, but it suits him very well; to be honest he would look good in any hair colour, not that you’d care though.
The first thirty minutes of the ride go by agonizingly slow and in complete silence.
When you drive onto the freeway you can’t take it anymore and mumble something among the lines of ‘wanna listen to some music?’.
You don’t wait for an answer, pressing the radio button right as you finish your sentence.
“uh, actually” hyunjin starts, his hand lifting to turn the radio back off, your eyes snap towards him, is he serious? Turning off your radio in your car?
“I wanted to address this situation” he says rather quietly.
You scoff “what? You realized that this is awkward just now?”
“no- I mean- yes I understand why you would think that but I just really want a chance to explain myself” he stutters.
“explain yourself” you repeat after him before mumbling “sure because there’s so much to explain”
“listen, I know you think I’m an asshole who just ghosted you b-“
“listen, I can handle rejection, you could’ve just said that you weren’t looking for something serious and I would’ve accepted that. The thing I’m mad about though is you literally making false promises and shit” 
Hyunjin blinks at you “can I please just explain to you what happened?”
You let out a long huff “sure” you wave your hand “go ahead”
“when you and your friends left at around 4, you wrote your number on my arm with your eyeliner, correct?” he asks.
Glancing over at him, you nod.
“after you where gone, I was already pretty drunk but then my friends decided to drag me with them to a different party that was still going” you see him fiddling with his hands in your peripheral “well I got super fucking shitfaced at that party and ended up puking on this one guys shoes”
You raise your eyebrows and hold back a laugh, which he notices.
“its okay you can laugh” he chuckles as well.
“anyways that guy was not very happy about it and busted my lip before kicking me and my friends out, so then back in the dorm my roommate sat me in the shower because I was full of alcohol, blood and puke”
“ew” you chime in.
“and when I woke up the next morning your number was gone” hyunjin looks over at you “we don’t have any mutual friends, I didn’t know what your major is so I couldn’t even asks for you in the administrating office, and then the covid lockdown happened and here we are”
“you called the administrating office?” you look over at him, he nods a little smile on his stupid pretty lips.
“yep, so, sorry to tell you but your eyeliner is not waterproof” he jokes at which you playfully knit your brows at him.
“believe me, I wanted to text you. I really wanted to take you out; and when you sent me your name yesterday I didn’t know if this was a lucky coincidence or if you’re a different y/n, that’s why I didn’t say anything” he explains.
You take a deep breath as you realize you have to apologize for going off on him just now, you believe him but you hate apologizing.
“well, I feel like an ass for going off on you like that after hearing all this” you chuckle “I’m sorry” you eye him shortly before looking back on the road.
“it’s okay, you don’t have to apologize I get how it looked, very much sus” he laughs with you.
-
Coming back to your car after you took a bathroom break on a highway rest-stop, you see hyunjin sitting in the drivers seat.
“what do you think you’re doing?” you smile as you sit down on the passenger seat.
“I thought maybe you’d like to sleep since its dark already and you’ve been driving for almost 3 hours” he suggests while putting on his seatbelt.
“well, I wont say no to that” you shrug and put your seatbelt on as well.
“so when did you go blonde?” you ask curiously.
“uh- around end of june” hyunjin chuckles “it was a dare if I’m being honest but I ended up liking it and got it redone”
“oh okay” you check out his profile once more and follow his hair with your eyes “I like it”
“yea?”
“yea, which is weird cause I’m usually not into blondes at all” you wonder.
“hm” he grins “must be me then” he says before winking at you.
“pfff, in your dreams” you rebuttal playfully, at which he laughs and mumbles a ‘true’.
You don’t react to it because you think your ears are playing tricks on you.
“hey I have a question too” hyunjin says.
“what’s up” you lean your arm against the window as you look over at him.
His face is slightly lit by the lights of the other cars, no seriously, how can a side profile be so perfect?
“why did you even agree to take me with you if you thought I ghosted you?” he grins.
You laugh “well, I’m a nice person and I know not a lot of people there are from seoul and my mom raised me right, okay?”
“okay okay” he giggles, the way his eyes crinkle when he does makes you smile everytime.
“or…did you have such a good time with me on new years that you just had to jump on this opportunity?” he quips, carefully stealing a peek at you.
“sure, why do you think I was so upset when you didn’t text” you feign sadness.
The both of you laugh before falling into comfortable silence.
When looking outside your window, you think back to said new years eve.
-(flashback)
“oh my god” you said, stepping into the big hall that usually is the universities gym. But whoever planned this outdid themselves.
A dj was placed on one of the tribunes and a whole buffet of drinks and punches on the other, as well as a big disco ball hanging from the ceiling, making the room shimmery and shiny.
You could see people coming out of the doors that connected into the universities hall on one side and into the locker rooms on the others, as if it wasn’t already packed.
“this is fucking insane” lia, your roommate from last semester, squeaked while grabbing your arm and jumping a little, her voice overpowering the blasting music..
“I wanna get fucking hammered tonight” you turned to her.
“oh babe don’t worry,  we didn’t come here to drink soda” she laughed before spotting some of your other friends.
About five minutes before midnight you and some more girls gathered at the buffet of drinks and started doing shots.
You all had decided that instead of kissing someone at 12 o’clock you’d ring in 2020 with a shot, because alcohol can’t cheat on you.
You were laughing at something when some people started the countdown.
10!
9!
8!
7!
6!
5!
4!
3!
2!
1!
“HAPPY NEW YEAR”
Every one shouted and celebrated in union as you downed your shot.
“happy new year babe” lia hugged you after downing hers.
“happy new year!” you shouted into her ear, full of relief that this stressful year was over.
“lets do another one” she grinned widely after your whole friend group had shared their wishes with each other.
A girl you didn’t know very well handed you another shot, just as you emptied your glass you heard a guy yell something before stumbling into your back.
“jesus” you stumbled forward a bit before turning around, ready to throw someone a dirty look.
“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” in front of you suddenly stood a tall dark haired young man with almost too perfect facial features, frowning a little out of concern.
“nothing happened” you smiled, taking a step towards him so he’d hear you better.
“I’m glad” he replied, a grin slowly stretched across his handsome face
“I’m y/n” you giggled as you held out your hand.
His eyes crinkled with his smile as he took your hand in his “I’m hyunjin” he said before pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.
“okay guys let her have her fun lets go over there” you hear lia usher your friends away from behind you.
“happy new year y/n” he said before instinctively pulling you a little closer to him when a group of people passed behind you.
“happy new year hyunjin” you replied, a slow blush creeping on your face from how intensely he was taking in your appearance.
“well yea happy fucking new years to me for running into you” he joked before taking a sip, your brain wasn’t able to function anymore so you just giggled and nervously pushed your hair behind your ear.
It had been way too long since you’d talked to a guy, especially someone as attractive as him
“you’re fucking stunning” hyunjin complimented you and lifted your hand with his to make you spin for him, to which you complied because you took a long time getting ready and always appreciate being appreciated.
“thank you” you were crimson red by now but hoped he wouldn’t see because of the dimmed lights.
“how come I’ve never seen you around? I would’ve remembered you” he tilted his head.
“oh this was my first year here and I live on the other side of campus so…” you nodded slowly “but yea I would’ve remembered you too”
He grinned before downing his drink and putting on the table next to the both of you.
“wanna dance?”
That’s how you found yourself on the dance floor with hyunjin pressed against your back.
Slowly but surely the alcohol made you braver; and it didn’t take long for the dj to play perfect songs to grind yourself against his toned body to.
His reaction was instant, hands gripping even harder at your waist and his own movements matching your own.
You looked back at him just to have the air knocked out of your lungs, a barely there sheen of sweat was covering his forehead; his pupils were dilated and his lips were slightly parted before his tongue swiftly swept over his lower lip.
He looked like sex on legs and moved like it too.
His plump lips formed into a grin when he noticed you staring, you didn’t know if it was the alcohol running through your system but you so desperately wanted to kiss him.
“can’t stop looking at you either, pretty” he lowered his head to mumble against your cheek before pressing a kiss there.
“you’re so goddamn sexy” you blurted out as you turned around to face him, running one of your hands through his dark hair before positioning them on his firm chest.
He threw back his head as his chest vibrated with laughter.
“don’t laugh at me” you laughed as you locked eyes again.
“you’re cute when you’re drunk” hyunjin brought one hand to your face to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
“you dont even know me sober” you giggle “also i’m not drunk!” you protested playfully, his hands found your waist in the meantime to pull you flush to his body; at which you gasped almost inaudibly.
“oh really?” he looked down at you, clearly amused “didn’t you drink like 5 shots half an hour ago?”
“well well well, I didn’t know I had an audience” you countered, looping your arms around his neck.
Hyunjin prodded at the inside of his cheek with his tongue before looking away for a swift second, slightly embarrassed because he just exposed himself.
You felt yourself gush a little when he licked his lips again after bringing his gaze back to you.
“so you almost knocked me over on purpose?” you grinned even bigger when he shook his head laughingly.
“listen” he chuckled, leaning down unnecessarily close because you could hear him perfectly fine but you weren’t going to complain.
“I actually didn’t run into you on purpose, that was my friends doing after he saw me notice you” he said.
You mouthed an ‘ahh’ while nodding, feigning disbelief.
“I’m serious” hyunjin laughed “I still have to thank him later; I would’ve probably chickened out”
He got quieter at the end of his sentence, his eyes jumping to your lips when you wet your lower lip with your tongue quickly.
“i-m glad he pushed you then” you replied, trying to hide the fact that your heart was pumping your blood in record time.
“yea” he inched his face closer to yours as you tilted your chin up to meet him in the middle “me too”
His eyes switched from your lips to your eyes one more time before closing the gap between the both of you.
His lips were firm but soft at the same time in the way they moulded against yours, you swore you could hear lia squealing from somewhere but maybe you were just hearing things.
But when his tongue touched yours in the most tentative way you lost contact to what was going on around you, slinging your arms tighter around his neck and deepening the kiss.
A tiny groan escaped hyunjins throat when you carded your fingers through his hair to tug on it and release some of the adrenalin that rushed through you.
He was slow and explorative and let you take control from time to time before sucking on your lower lip and making you loose it.
You didn’t know how many songs had passed; to be honest you didn’t even remember what song was playing when you started kissing.
All you knew in that moment was hyunjins lightly flushed cheeks, swollen lips and dark glistening eyes.
“let’s go somewhere else?” he questioned in a whisper when you bit your lip, nodding at his question.
He grabbed your hand in his before manoeuvring the both of you through the dancing and celebrating crowd.
Before you knew it, hyunjin pulled you into the entrance hall of the university where multiple people had the same idea as you.
Couples scattered across the big room, some just talking, most of them however making out heavily.
“come on” he softly tugged at your hand, smiling when your gaze falls on him.
He lead you up the big flight of stairs onto a floor of the building you’ve never been to, stopping in front of a random room before pulling a small set of keys out of his back pocket.
After unlocking the door, he opened it to let you step inside.
It was a dance studio, the wall right across from you was just one huge mirror through which you could see the big couch in the back of the room and the water dispensers next to it.
“why do you have the keys for this room?” you asked, giggling.
Hyunjin grinned as he closed the door “I’m a dance major, we all have keys for the practice rooms”
“that’s so cool” you beamed “I wish I could dance” you looked around the room, walking towards the mirrored wall a little bit.
“you were moving just fine earlier” hyunjin came up behind you, nimble hands finding your waist as he looked you up and down through the mirror intensely, now that you were under the bright lights of the room.
You couldn’t help but to smile a little at that, the tight little glitter dress that you had chosen really did accentuate your curves in the best way possible, paired with the cute black heels which made your legs look way longer than they actually are.
“but that was like club sexy dancing, you know?” you elaborated.
“hm” he hummed amusedly “whats wrong with sexy club dancing?” you turned around to him.
He didn’t look to shabby himself, all in black, a chic button up with some jeans and a belt; accessorized with rings on his pretty fingers, a  dainty silver necklace and some small earrings.
Some might say he was underdressed, but the way he carried himself with such confidence, and that face of his must for sure be a panty dropper, you thought.
“nothing but… I don’t know, teach me something” you pleaded.
“what do you want me to teach you?” he laughed.
“I don’t know a pirouette or something” you suggested, laughing as well.
“okay” he grinned “this is like the base stance” he positioned himself correctly before looking at you to see if you were following his instructions.
“mhm” you hummed, replicating what he was doing.
“and then you get momentum with one leg to be able to swing yourself around, like this” hyunjin explained before executing a perfect pirouette and ending it back in the base stance.
“that was fast” you chuckled.
“your turn” he grins before moving behind you “try to keep your eyes on yourself in the mirror otherwise you’ll loose balance”
“okay” you said unsurely.
“I’ll catch you if you fall” he winked at you, at which you scoff playfully before carefully swinging yourself into a pirouette.
You landed on wobbly legs but before you could tip over hyunjin stabilized you with a firm grip on your hips.
“you’re a natural” he grinned at you through the mirror.
“well thank you” you playfully feigned cockiness before he spun you around himself.
A few seconds pass of the both of you taking in each others features in silence, the only thing you could hear was the faint music of the party downstairs, before hyunjin spoke up.
“can I kiss you?”
You fell into giggles again as you let your forehead rest against his collarbone before looking up again “we’ve kissed before”
“yea but that was like a moment and I don’t want to catch you off guard or anything” he mumbles cutely.
“mm” you nod “ you can kiss me”
And with a smile, he does.
You weren’t surprised when his first gentle ministrations turned into more desperate ones rather quickly because you could feel the warmth spread in your lower regions as well.
He walked the both of you over to the couch, only parting from your lips when he sat down on the black leather material of the couch.
“come here, pretty girl” he took your hand to help you straddle him, your dress riding up but you couldn’t care less if he saw your safety shorts, and he didn’t seem to care either by the way he feverishly connected your lips again.
His hands travelled down to squeeze at your waist before smoothing over your ass and grabbing a handful of each cheek, you moaned into the kiss when you realized how big his hands were.
Your own hands were squeezing at his shoulders before one moved into his soft hair while the other softly rested on his cheek.
The kiss was messy and desperate, teeth clinking together and tongues licking at each other.
The things that riled you up the most however were his groans and praises.
“you’re so fucking sexy” he groaned before moving down to kiss at your jaw and down your neck.
A needy whimper escaped from your throat when he started suckling the sensitive skin at the base of your throat.
“fuck-hyunjin” you moaned when his teeth grazed over your clavicle.
Your hands fumbled before landing on his belt, at which he pulled away from your skin, gently taking your hands off of his belt.
“I’d love to take you out first, actually” his pretty kiss swollen lips twitched up into a shy smile as he pants.
“oh” you were taken aback, you were almost certain that this was something regular for him “I thought-“
“I mean if you just want to fuck we can fuck of course” he chuckled “but- I actually think you’re really cute and fun and I’d love to get to know you better”
Your mouth stood a little agape “uh- I mean-I” you stuttered, your brain not functioning properly because of the alcohol running through your veins but also him!
“its okay if you just want, you know-“
“no!” you blurted out all over sudden, making him flinch a little “sorry, uhm- its just been a while since I had a date” you smile apologetically.
His expression visibly brightens “that’s okay” he giggled “so is that a yes?”
You grinned, leaning in to just barely brush your lips with his, his head twitching upwards in an attempt to connect them fully.
“yes” you whispered, at which he smiled brightly before pulling your in for a kiss by your neck.
-(flashback end)
“y/n”
“hey, y/n” you grumble when you feel someone gently rocking your shulder.
“mmm-what?” you peek your eyes open just to see hyunjin smile at you.
“good morning sunshine” he teases as you sit up in your seat when you realize you aren’t driving anymore.
“just kidding its not morning” he says as you look around your car, realizing your on a parking lot.
“where the fuck are we?” you whip your head towards him “did you bring me here to kill me? kidnap me?”
“wha?- no” he laughs “no, I’m sorry. Right after you fell asleep there was this huge traffic jam because of an accident and we stood there for almost 3 hours so I drove off and found this” he points out the rear window, where you see a small motel building.
You look back at him before checking the time on your phone, seeing it was indeed almost midnight.
“fuck” you swear to yourself.
“I didn’t know if you wanted to keep driving because I was getting tired so I thought maybe-“ hyunjin starts rambling guiltily, not wanting you to thing that this was an attempt to get in your pants.
“hey” you put your hand on his shoulder after taking off your seatbelt “this is good, you made the right decision I think we both could use some sleep” you say.
You each take your suitcases and walk inside, it’s an old building but it looks pretty clean for a motel off of the highway.
“good evening you two” an old lady sits behind the, probably just as old, reception.
“good evening, could we get 2 single rooms, please” hyunjin speaks up politely.
“I’m afraid we only have 2 double bed rooms available, if you’d like to take them, they will however be more expensive than the rooms for one” she explains politely.
“its okay, we’ll take one of those, please” you decide, hyunjins head snapping towards you.
“is that okay?” you ask him.
“yea- sure” he nods.
“alright, room 301 it is” she hands you the key before stating that you’ll have to checkout before 12 pm and what the room costs.
“do you accept card?” hyunjin asks at which the friendly old lady nods before taking his card and swiping it through her little machine.
“I’ll venmo you half of what you paid” you say after unlocking room 301.
He tsk’s at you before shaking his head “don’t, it was my idea so I’ll pay”
“are you sure?” you ask closing the door behind you when he turns on the lights.
“yup-oh” he exclaims.
“this room is cute” you say, it’s small but the walls are a soft sunflower yellow, decorated with paintings of autumn leaves .
The bed looks clean, and when you smell the mouse gray blankets and pillows, they smell fresh as well.
“stop smelling the pillows” hyunjin laughs.
“I’ve never been to a motel, I thought everything would be dirty or ancient” you confess comically.
He chuckles as he comes out of the small bathroom “the bathroom is clean too, don’t worry” he says when you look at him expectantly.
“I’ll sleep on the floor if you want” he offers as you open your suitcase to get out your toothbrush and pj’s.
“it’s fine, hyunjin I’ve slept in the same bed as a male before” you joke.
“well how am I supposed to know that?” he counters, at which you throw your pj shorts at him out of reflex.
When you realize what you had done it was too late, he was already holding them out in front of him before giggling.
“very cute choice” he mocks the small white shorts with red hearts all over it.
“stoop” you whine, trying to fish it out of his hands but he holds them over his head like a kindergartener.
“I remember why I don’t like you” you pout, crossing your arms.
His face drops alongside with his arms “I thought we were past that”
You use his moment of weakness to snatch your shorts out of his hands “gotcha”
-
“see I told you I was gonna take you out” hyunjin beams at you before looking down at the various snacks he took from the motels vending machine, which were laying in between the both of you on the bed.
“and so luxurious too” you joke, crossing your legs.
“only the best for you” he grins when you open a pack of fruit jellies.
“you know, I was thinking about new years” you say “ and I realized that it was your fault!”
Hyunjin throws his head back as he groans playfully “why?”
“if you hadn’t lost your phone when we got back downstairs, I wouldn’t have had to write my number on your arm; or you could’ve just given me your number and I could’ve text you. But you didn’t even know your own number!” you laugh in reminiscence.
“listen” he laughs “I was drunk and you’re hot! I couldn’t think” he defends himself before taking a bite off a chocolate bar.
You blush a little but play it off with a laugh.
“but yes, I admit, it was indeed my fault” he dramatically holds his hand in front of his eyes.
“yeeees!” you exclaim victoriously.
“I’m kidding though” you pat his knee “I forgive you”
“I’m glad” he smiles.
After the both of you are done eating way too many sweets, you find yourself being really comfortable when talking to hyunjin.
He’s funny, doesn’t seem like he’s full of himself and just in general seems like a very kind person.
“I thought you were a fuckboy when me met” you confess, looking at him.
Propped on one elbow looking down at you, while you lay on your side towards him, his face illuminated only by the little lights on each of your nightstands.
“you did?” he asks confusedly.
“yea” you chuckle “you were so confident and…sexy I don’t know” you place your hand over your face in embarrassment.
“oh that was the liquid courage talking, I’m usually pretty shy” he shakes his head smilingly when you peek through your fingers.
“don’t lie” you push his shoulder softly.
“I’m serious!” he laughs.
“you were the first guy to approach me at a party” you pause “like ever”
“no way, you’re lying now” he furrows his brows.
“nope” you shake your head.
“but I was really close to not talking to you as well, I’m sure there were many guys before me that just didn’t have the liquid courage, like I did” he speculates.
“maybe” you say.
“have any exes?” he asks after a few seconds.
“yea, one”
“well how did you meet him?”
“he showed me around on my first day of freshman year, I transferred like in the middle of the first semester so I wasn’t with any other freshmen” you tell him.
“why’d you break up if I may ask?” hyunjin asks carefully.
“oh we were only together for like three weeks, you can’t even call I relationship. He used me to make his hot ex jealous and cheated on me with her” you say “but hey they’re back together at least” you scoff.
“i’m sorry” he mumbles at which you look up at him.
“it’s not your fault” you chuckle.
“well, still no one should feel that way” he says “you know that you were way too good for him right?”
You nod.
“what about you? Have any exes?” you ask back.
He snickers “only one in seoul”
“why didn’t you last?”
“it was a long distance situation, she was super jealous and couldn’t trust me. which I can understand to a certain degree but everytime I went out she wanted me to facetime her and show her what kinds of people were there with me. That was just too much” he explains.
“wow” you chuckle “that doesn’t sound fun either”
Hyunjin shakes his head “nope, but hey we got rid of ‘em, didn’t we?”
“yea” you giggle “plus if I hadn’t broken up with him I would’ve probably never gone to the new years eve party”
“I guess I owe him something then” he grins as you scooch up on the bed.
“can I kiss you?” you ask after a few seconds of silence.
“hm?” hyunjins eyes almost spring out of his head.
“I don’t want to catch you off guard” you grin as you repeat his words from the night you met, sitting up.
He licks his lower lip as a grin stretches over his face as he sits up as well “do your worst”
You get up on your knees to shuffle over to him, when you get close enough hyunjin grabs one of your thighs and lifts it over his legs so you’re straddling him.
Once you sit down on his lap, your eyes lock again and you’re once again baffled as to how someone can be so god damn attractive.
His eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips expectantly, a shaky breath leaving his lips when you lean in.
Your lips connect and it feels like all the pent up energy of liking him since that night finally gets set free, sparks glowing behind your lit and his hands leaving a trail of fire where ever they go.
They squeeze at your thighs and waist, pulling you impossibly close to himself.
A whimper tears from your throat when his tongue licks at yours, he tastes like chocolate and what could only be described as him.
He moans into the kiss when you tug at the blonde locks that weren’t pulled back into the ponytail; before pulling the hair tie out of his hair to free it and finally card your fingers through all of the blonde glory.
Before you realize what’s going on, hyunjin lifts the both of you before dropping you on your back and crawling above you.
The fact that he just lifted the both of you from a sitting position as if you weigh nothing makes you feel all types of hot.
“you’re so hot holy shit” you pant as you push his long hair out of his face.
“ditto” he only grins before attaching his lips to your exposed collarbone and sucking a bruise into the skin.
“take it off” you moan as you tug on the dark blue calvin klein shirt he’s wearing.
His lips release the skin of your collarbone before sitting up to pull the shirt over his head.
If your mouth wasn’t already open from your heavy breathing, you would’ve opened it now because his body is more sculpted and toned than you had expected.
Your hand lifts to smooth over his abs, muscles flexing as he connects your lips again.
His one hand slides from your waist up to cup one of your breasts, gently palming the soft flesh.
“I know I said I wanted to take you out first but-“ he mumbles against your lips.
“you bought me a lovely dinner” you interrupt him, threading your fingers through the hair that’s falling down into his vision.
He grins, dropping a short peck to your lips before his the grin gets wiped off his face “I don’t have a condom with me”
“I’m on the pill” you let him know “I got tested before the lockdown and I haven’t been with anyone since soo…”
“yea, me too, I was tested a few months ago” he nods.
You nod back, biting your lip as you absently play with his hair.
“do you trust me?” hyunjin asks, observing your demeanour.
“yea- yea I do I’m just nervous” you smile awkwardly.
“no” he coos before kissing you “why are you nervous?”
“just haven’t been with anyone for a while” you confess.
Hyunjin nods understandingly “if you don’t want to do this we’ll stop”
“no I really want to” you look into his eyes as confidently as you can.
“okay” he smiles, planting his lips on yours again.
“can i?” his voice gives you goosebumps when he mumbles against the sensitive skin under your ear, his fingers slowy undoing the loose knot of your heart shorts.
“yes” you say when he locks eyes with you.
“I love these shorts” he softly presses a kiss to your knee, trying to calm your nerves a little, before he gently rocks your hips to pull them off of you.
You blush a little out of embarrassment but smile when you lift your hips to help him.
“cute” he whispers when he see’s your panties have a little bow on the front.
He chuckles when you hide your face in embarrassment, pulling you closer to him again by your thighs before you let him kiss you again.
“can I take this off too?” hyunjin whispers, softly pulling at the fabric of the tank top you’re wearing, at which you nod.
You are still wearing a bra when he pulls it off so you take it into your own hands and unclasp your bra.
Your nipples stiffen a little at the sudden exposure to air, as well as to hyunjin’s admiring gaze.
“fuck” he muses when palming your breasts in his big hands, gently pushing them together an running his thumbs over your nipples.
A whimper involuntarily leaves your lips when he wraps his plump lips around one of the perked up nubs and sucks gently.
“so fucking pretty, princess” you feel yourself pathetically clench around nothing at his praise.
You feel one of his hands wander downwards to provide some friction for you, he slots his lips against yours when you tentatively roll your hips against his hand.
Hyunjin feels his cock get even harder when an almost desperate moan tumbles from your lips against his. So he ads a little more pressure and starts circling your clit with two fingers, your sighs of pleasure mixing into the kiss.
“you’re so sensitive baby” he whispers as he parts his lips from yours “can I go down on you?” he grazes his lips over your chest, looking up at you seductively.
You nod as you bite your lip, hyunjin placing a few kisses on your tummy before shortly sitting up to also free you from your soaked panties.
The first stripe he licks up your slit, and how he swirls the tip of his tongue around your clit expertly sends you to heaven.
His hands are gripping your thighs to prevent you from closing your legs, your hands are tangled in his hair and the sheets.
“hyunj-fuck” you cry out when his tongue enters you.
He carefully prods one finger at your entrance “is that okay?” he asks, his voice hoarse and dripping with lust.
“yea” you sigh.
Once you adjust to one finger, he adds a second one, curling them upwards to search for that specific patch inside of you.
“yes-fuck right there” you moan when his fingers press onto the sweetest spot inside of you, tugging at his hair a little harshly. But you feel him moan against you, getting lost in your taste as he sucks your clit in between his soft lips.
Your hips buckle against his mouth as your eyes roll backwards, feeling the warmth of your orgasm approach rapidly.
“fuck fuck yes-hyunjin” you cry out just before he tipped you over the edge with his skillful ministration, your orgasm rushing up your spine and into your head, endorphins spreading everywhere.
A cry of pleasure fills the room as your thighs starts trembling with the aftershocks, clamping around his head when he drives you into overstimulation.
“oh-shit-“ you pant as you softly pushed on his forehead to get him away from your clit, his fingers still inside you, guiding you through your high.
He nibbles on your inner thigh apologetically. You can still hear your heartbeat in your ears after hyunjin removes his fingers from you and sits up, gently holding your legs together to help you calm down.
“fuck” you mewl, a soft smile tugging at his lips.
He’s wanted to do this for so long and there you are, with all of your naked glory in front of him.
While he’s daydreaming about you, you sit up and start fiddling with his sweatpants.
“you want more?” he quips, once he realises what you’re doing, leaning in to kiss you.
“mhm” you humm into the kiss affirmitavely when his hand holds you close to him by your jaw.
With a quick last peck to your lips he simultaneously shimmies the soft black sweats and his boxers off of himself.
You apparently visibly gulp at the sight of his cock because hyunjin smirks cockily “like what you see?” as he crawls above you again, his lips finding yours again and not waiting for an answer.
“I don’t know if you’ll fit” you mumble when he suckles at the soft nook of skin under your ear.
“we can stop here” he offers softly before locking eyes again.
You shake your head as you reach down to fist his length, slowly pumping it and smearing the few drops of precum around.
“no, you’re just really big” you huff with a shy smile on your lips at which hyunjin groans.
“you’re gonna be the death of me, you know?” he mutters against your lips before kissing you deeply, his hand smoothing over the slope of your waist before coming up to gently pinch at one of your nipples.
Eliciting a soft high pitched moan from you, this only spurs him on.
Rolling his tongue against yours desperately and making you taste yourself before sinfully sucking at the wet muscle.
All the while you’re stroking him with your small hand before cupping his balls, as if he didn’t already feel like he’s gonna blow his load way too early.
“please” you whine, guiding his reddened tip towards your entrance.
Hyunjin releases a shaky breath before replacing your hand with his, rutting his hips against yours a few times, coating his length in your wetness.
This already had your toes curling, suppressing a whine as you lock your legs around his waist.
“tell me if it hurts, yea?” he breathes, only pressing inside you after you nod, dropping a kiss to your swollen lips.
“fuck” he swears softly, tucking his face in the crook of your neck when he breaches your tight walls for the first time.
Your fingers tighten in his hair at the back of his neck when a subtle sting flares up inside of you.
“ah-“ your body flinches a little when he presses further inside, hyunjin notices, observing your expression before kissing your cheek and sitting up slowly.
“you’re doing so good, baby” he lifts his thumb to his lips, swiftly kitten-licking the digit before bringing it to where your bodies join.
Gently rolling your clit under his thumb to distract you from the pain.
“you look so perfect like this” his other hand travels over your stomach to gently squeeze at your breasts “all spread out for me”
You whimper, arching your back when hyunjin thrusts into you carefully; the pain slowly subsiding and the ache to be fully filled up by him growing exponentially when his cock rubs against your g spot.
“hyunjin” you moan, gripping onto his hand, which is resting atop your breast.
“yes baby, I’m here” he groans at how tight you feel once he’s balls deep inside of you, abandoning your clit to grab you by the hips for leverage.
His other hand resting on your cheek now, after a few trusts you moan “harder, please”
Hyunjin groans and fulfils your wish, at one particularly harsh thrust, you latch your lips around his pointer and middle finger, sucking at them.
“oh my god-that’s so fucking hot” he grunts through clenched teeth.
His cock dragging along your walls deliciously, filling you up to the brim as you hum around his slender fingers in pleasure.
“you like my hands that much baby?” his jaw is clenched and the grip on your waist is rough , the contrast to how sweet he was just a few minutes earlier had you clench around him furiously.
“fuck-“ he breathes when you nod to the best of your abilities, eyes wide open and holding his gaze.
You only release his fingers from in between your lips in favour for a loud high pitched moan when his other hand finds your clit again, rubbing harsh circles into the bud.
“-gonna cum-huynjin” you dig your nails into his biceps, eyes squeezing shut.
“yea?” he grits through his teeth the fingers that were previously trapped in your mouth now wrapping around your bared throat.
Not squeezing tightly, just resting there as if to show you that you’re his now.
Your thought gets confirmed when he rasps “you’re gonna date me after this, right pretty girl?”
You do look so pretty right now, tits bouncing and skin slapping because of the fast rhythm that he’s snapping his hips into yours, not to mention the subtle sheen of sweat that’s coating the both of you.
A desperate breathy chuckle tumbles from your lips “ yes-yes fuck” you feel your second orgasm creeping up on you.
“cum for me princess, all over my cock” he urges you on, his tip hammering into the sweet spot inside of you repeatedly before you crash into your second high of the night.
Your body convulses in pleasure as you call out his name mixed with profanities, your toes curling so hard you’re not sure if you can ever uncurl them again, and your nails probably leaving painful indents in his skin.
His thumb on your clit slows down until you grab his hand for him to stop, his hand around your neck grabs your free one, holding both of your hands over your head now.
“so good, baby” he mumbles, kissing your lips; mostly just breathing into each other as he rocks you through every wave of your orgasm.
Hyunjin looses himself in you not long after with a guttural moan and his eyes squeezing shut.
You coax him through it when he rests his face against your neck again, running your fingertips through his damp hair and over his broad back, muscles tensing under your gentle touch.
i“don’t fall asleep on me” you whisper sneakily, grinning when he chuckles against your neck, tickling the soft skin there.
He props himself up again to scan over your features, pushing some hair out of your face before kissing you tenderly.
“you okay?” his hand resting at your temple as he gently runs his thumb over your hairline.
“more than” you assure him, cupping his cheeks to pull his lips onto yours again.You think you can never get enough of his lips, anything about him for that matter; not when he makes you feel so cared about and safe.
“so does this mean we’re dating now?” he whispers after he has cleaned you up and tucked the both of you in bed.
“hmh” you nod your head sleepily, positioned on his bare chest.
“so I can spoon you once we fall asleep?” he asks, grin evident in his voice.
“you can spoon me but you can’t wake me up in the middle of the night if you get horny” you mumble jokingly, enjoying his fingers running down your spine as your eyelids get heavier.
“okay” he giggles softly, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head before you whisper your good nights to each other.
And as promised, he doesn’t wake you up in the middle of the night because he’s horny.
It’s you who wakes him, because after 10 months of wasted time, you have a lot of catching up to do.
-
a/n: oml this is my first ever long fic so pls pls pls give me feedback, i had so much fun writing his even though it made me feel even more single but hey :))))
allsooo i waited til after work to publish this and i just saw i hit 500 followers?!?!?! thats crazy to me omg i started this like 2 months ago and so many ppl liked my stuff so much that they decided to follow me?? so i just wanna say thank u thank u thank u for hitting the follow button even though im very unorganized and everything i do is spontaneaous and not thought out well. but hey i guess there is a reason that u followed me so thank u!
(i’d love if u sent me an ask with the first one of my writings that u stumbled across, and how <3 ...only if u want tho no pressure) 
anyways thank u so much for reading if you’ve made it this far! i hope you have a great day/ night! much love
-aj
(this is a work of fiction and does not represent the real actions of stray kids or hwang hyunjin)
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ringmyheart · 3 years
Note
hey, i was wondering if i could hv headcanons with how to fight characters? maybe when their crush's parents scold them for getting bad score at school, like that time at the end of the semester. pls do it with seong taehoon and jiyeon woo. thank you! 🥺
SEONG TAEHOON
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The first thing he’s gonna do honestly is tell u to fight ur parents. U tell him about how u got a bad score and how it’s the end of the semester and the test/ur overall grade was important and he’s so used to living life the way HE wants he tells u to just. Fight them
And you’re first thought 2 say is idk how to fight? Bc what he said is just so sudden and kinda preposterous and ur upset and he’s like okay, I’ll teach u then and ur like I’m not fighting my parents 😭 and he goes okay then I’LL do it
And u have to rlly reiterate like” NOBODY is fighting my parents” first and foremost and after that he kind of just goes silent because he has no idea how to help you or what to do and u have knocked every idea he’s offered out of the park
Truthfully I don’t think he cares about grades too much for himself and this extends to you too. He doesn’t get why you’re so concerned, and his dad (I’m pretty sure form what we’ve seen so far) is really nice and laidback so it’s not like he’s ever being reprimanded so he’s also partfully angry at your parents bc they made u upset
Like rlly angry LMAO and as ur ranting to him ab how they yelled at u for bad grades he’s just like one day… one day he’s gna fight them 😐 he doesn’t make exceptions. He might tell u to tell them to watch out LMAO but he says it so dead seriously and u laugh but wonder if he’s even joking ?
He’s like okay well have u considered: running away
And u quickly dismiss that idea too bc u have nowhere to go and it’s literally just them scolding u ur like it’s not THAT srs... I’m just upset and he’s like u have a place to sta... nvm he’s not gonna b sweet if it’s not like absolutely necessary LOL
Bc of his lack of understanding or just overall interest in this kind of stuff, he just listens to u bc his advice clearly wasn’t cutting it for u.
He asks to see the grade and u hand him the test or the grade folder and it if ur grades weren’t even that bad, he’s gonna get frustrated w you and be like u have gotta b kidding me this is what ur stressed about 😐 what ur parents yelled at u for?? And he smacks u on the side of ur head and is like please tell me ur joking these are good. Anything above a C in his eyes is still really good
If ur grades were a D, he’s like neutral like okay yeah it was kinda bad but not the worst, don’t stress about it I’ve gotten tons of D’s.
And if it was an F he’s like oh okay yeah it was pretty bad like I get it. But this would just make things worse and ur like ur right I did so baaad and he’s like nonono oh no it’s not like that and he like stiffens and goes quiet when u get misty eyed I guess and wonders once again why this is so serious to you?? Who cares about grades?
He probably gets mad ur letting other ppl control ur life. We’ve seen that he hates other ppl living their lives for others or by others rules and he’s kinda frustrated at you and wishes he could just take over u for a day or something and tell ur parents off and ur talking about it and he’s narrowing his eyes at you but ur clearly upset so he’s not gonna yell at u rn. When u feel better ab this he probably will tell you to stop living by others standards but for now he’s kinda lost
He tries to convince u to rise up against ur parents and is like “are u gonna keep letting people in ur life control u?!” And it’s like a motivational pep talk and ur like “no!” And he’s like “are you gonna let THEM yell at you and hurt YOUR feelings?! Cause I sure as hell am not!” And ur getting more energetic and r like “me neither!” And he’s like “are you gonna let ur own PARENTS talk to YOU like that?!” And u go “no!!” Nd he’s like “we r sick of it!!” And u go “ya we r 😭” and then he thinks ur on board so he’s like good!! Let’s go beat ur parents
And ur like “what” and he realizes u weren’t on the same page the entire time so he eventually bedgrudginly will lie that idea go
And he tells you this, like he says it won’t matter in seven years, right?? So why does it matter? Pls cheer up and be doesnt outright say this but he’s like “don’t worry ur pretty little head about it” or something to cheer u up
If it works and he successfully consoles u he is rlly happy and doesn’t show it but he’ll shove his hands in his pockets and go “see?? I told you. I’m good at this advice thing.”
If it doesn’t, he’ll try to take ur mind off it and he probably just shows u his spinning back kick or something LMAO or take u to the dojo so u can either do stuff w him or just watch
But if u tell him what ur upset about isn’t grades but ur parents, he’ll listen to u tell him what they told u if it was mean or strict and if it’s rlly bad his eyes will go bloodshot and he’ll roll up his sleeves and be like okay let me at them then
Literally don’t even JOKE ab him beating up ur parents he will do it 😭😭 and worse thing is he’ll WIN. Don’t even be like “yeah I wish u would beat them up for me” bc he doesn’t draw the line between u joking and him actually doing it probably. Even if he knows ur joking, which he will bc he’s not dense he’ll use it against u and be like u have me permission and suddenly ur the instigator
He listens to u rant about them if u just want a listener and he can probably tell by ur body language… like If ur clearly wanting advice, he’ll offer u the best he can and will tell you to stick up for yourself or, if you’re really upset he’ll even consider talking to them for u. No fists to his chagrin but he’ll advocate for u and he won’t plan beforehand at all he’ll just say “I think u need 2 be nicer to ur child.” And will be like “this shit doesn’t even matter anyways” and will rip the test paper in front of them so this option is obviously not even a choice for you
If u start to cry he’ll first awkwardly do that thing that people do when they don’t know how to console someone and rub your arm and he’s like “Uhh, do u want water?” Bc he’s sad bc UR sad and doesn’t know what to do and it’s like what he’s doing isn’t that helpful but the tone in his voice is v consoling and comforting bc he’s suddenly kinda quiet 4 once
If ur sobbing he’ll hold u and u cry into his shirt and later he’ll talk about how you got it all wet but like when he goes home in the mirror and sees the tear stains it reminds him ur hurt and breaks his heart
He will study with you. And by studying it’s just him like sitting with you while you study. He doesn’t think you should study but if that’s how you want to solve this and feel better he’s down. He won’t read anything but if u have flash cards he will read them back to you and ask u questions and he doesn’t know the right answer himself (unless it’s math he’s probably rlly rlly good at math.) so u have to write them on the back. But he’s pretty good at helping u study
And if ur doing flash cards, he won’t tell u the answer until u guess it and he’s good at hinting to it and he gets annoyed VERY easily when ur not saying the answer u wrote on the back but bites it down
If ur parents make u stay home more and study as like a consequence of gettig a bad grade, he won’t have any of it
He will either confront ur parents and that either makes things somewhat better or incredibly worse
So if that’s what happens he’ll text u a lot and face time u in secret and call u a lot so even tho ur not together, every time u come home from school and open a book ur phone is hidden in the bend of it and ur fting and sometimes u don’t even talk he’s just FaceTiming u so u won’t b alone while u study and bc he misses u
Overall, he really couldn’t give a shit about grades but if need be, he’ll help u with urs, he’d be the best math tutor if ur looking, if ur parents lock u up a lot to study more bc they’re mad he will use any other option to see u, and he’ll try his best to console u despite not being that knowledgeable or understanding why you’re upset. His go to comfort option is distraction, but if it’s futile he’ll do whatever it is u wanna do. If u thank him for helping u he’ll kick something and will b like “yeah whatever I was just sick of u moping around.”
JIYEON WOO
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He understands what’s going on with you all too well. When you tell him ur parents scolded u bc u didn’t do so hot in a test or ur overall grades this semester, it’s like his heart is a weight that drops into his stomach and ties his intestine into a huge knot. Like he feels the dread set in
He’s takes a muuuuchhhh more calm approach than Taehoon tbh, like while ur talking he won’t say a word and will listen. He is SUCHHH a good listener and especially now he��s just staring at you and nodding his head to let you know he’s listening to make sure u know that like he is there and present and if ur sad he’s sad too like u guys r a “team”
While ur venting, if u begin to cry he’ll let u and he’s more of a “rub-ur-back-soothingly” type of consoler so he’ll do that and if u half hug him he’ll continue do it but he’s looking at u w the saddest eyes in the world ☹️
Doesn’t rlly know what to do at first besides listen and b nice
He might even get misty eyed with u too bc he understands so much. But he won’t bring up his home situation at ALL, it’s like ur stage and he’s just a listener, he won’t make u feel like he’s comparing ur pain
His fist clenched at his side because he’s angry at your parents AND his and he’s imagining what ur parents said in his mind and even if it wasn’t that bad, he’s fuming
He might even offer to run away w u too and he “knows a place” 😭and ur like omg it’s not that bad but after reminiscing on his own home life he just assumes you’re as sick of it as him
If you’re his s/o, you obviously know about his YouTube streams, so that week at the end of every stream he’ll take a risk and unmute it and go “and don’t worry about grades too much, guys :)” and ur “guys”
Either that or he’ll do something so he will stop streaming completely for that week bc it might make u feel like he’s rubbing it in ur face how much he studies nd how studious he is and yes it gets him in trouble w his dad but when u start to feel better ab ur grades and u smile and he’s like “I thought u were upset?” And u say “oh, yeah… I’m feeling better now :)” it’s all worth it
Since he’s so consumed w streaming if u weren’t able to ever meet in person, and u had to FaceTime or text him, he probably spams u and u guys have to text at like 3am bc he’s studying all other hours of the day so he’s under his covers and reading or calling u
Like it goes
‘My parents got mad at me bc I got bad grades :(((‘ and then he sees the text he reads it and then again and is like oh no bc is it like his situation???
And then u go get a snack or something and go MIA during texting but he doesn’t know that so he spams u bc he thinks that maybe ur parents took ur phone and r locking u up like his did him so he’s like
‘Are you okay?’
‘Hello…?’
‘Where did you go? :(‘
‘Are you okay?’
‘Please be okay…’
‘(Y/n)?’
And if he suspects ur parents took ur phone and r gonna read this he sends things a very lengthy and persuasive text that explains why this is cruel and unusual and to PLS give u ur phone back and then it says seen and ur like it’s still me :)) I’m okay but thx for worrying 😭❤️
And he’s like ‘thank god…’
Since he’s a part of that newtube company (XY or something? I forgot HAHA), he has connections honestly??? So if you’re that torn over this grade he might try and pull some strings to improve your grade, make classes easier or to reach your parents even. Like he affects his parents’ boss which then butterfly effects to you
Assures you that grades aren’t that important, or tries to, but it’s so horrible coming from him because he has such good grades and it always is gonna feel like he’s just saying that no matter what
If he could he’d fail a test too to make u feel better and like ur in it together but his dad would MURDER him. So he just tries to tell u it’s okay and graders aren’t that bad
If ur mostly upset over the bad grade, he’s like it’s fine, and even if it’s a grade he genuinely considers bad he’ll look at it like “...” before going this is fine too!! :) and in his mind he’s like if I got this my dad would kill me but would NOT tell you that EVERRR. He’s gonna do anything to preserve ur feeling rn and the next few weeks he’s especially nice to u
Will study with you to make you feel better but it’s hard because he’s really far ahead tbh :(( like he explains assuming u already have some ground knowledge. BUT he’s really good at being patient so if ur like I don’t understand and get frustrated he’s like “oh I’m sorry!!! Here, I’ll go over it again.”
U guys start spending time at the library and when his dad questions him he’s like I’m studying and he really is and it’s like a study date and it actually ends up being RLLY fun
Might even print u worksheets and stuff and leaves nice notes on them when he gives them to u like every chapter has another ‘u can do it’ of ‘ur already here?! Omg! Ur far ahead keep going!’ And lots of smiley faces and hearts in the margins
He is not above helping u cheat. He will give u answers in school, risking being caught nd getting in trouble, like he’ll find a way to sit as close to u as possible in class and “drop” his pen besides u that just happens to have a paper inside with all of the answers!!!!
And when you see it you’re so happy and you look at him and wink trying it be inconspicuous and it’s so obvious and he’s like omg (y/n) pls… but he’s happy ur happy and ur grades improve so much bc he gets every answer right and so of course you are getting them right too
But u both plan on u getting a few wrong to avoid suspicion and he’s so happy when ur happy bc ur grades improve so he’ll start sending u the HW, too
Will send u just study notes if u don’t want to cheat and they r so good and he’ll also send u his flash cards and everything and lend u notes from the past
He knows ur YouTube username so if u start to study a lot more bc of ur parents’ scolding and watch his streams to “study” w him despite the million viewers it’s like it’s just u nd him and when u comment like “here bc my parents yelled @ me and now im trying to improve my grades” he is simultaneously v happy ur there but also heart broken
If it’s mainly ur parents scolding u ur upset about, he’ll listen to u talk about it for hours on end over text, FaceTime, call, etc.
Makes a joke ab sending ur parents to the nursing home he volunteers at to cheer u up 😭😭 it either makes u son harder or laugh
Overall, he cares LOTS about grades, but his not urs. And if ur worried ab getting a job he’s like dw I’ll cover u in the future :)) and he’s very understanding bc he’s in a very similar situation and hates seeing u suffer like that or go thru that even if it’s genuinely not that bad. If u cry his works just SHATTERS and he’ll listen to u rant and cry for hours on end. And if ur grades were actually considerably bad, he won’t tell u that, and he’ll help u improve them bc THATS his solution to it and he’s good at helping u study. If ur not up to it he will help u cheat despite the danger of getting caught, so he can see u happy again :(( he’s rlly so sad ur going thru the same thing as him and will do anything to make it better. Won’t offer to fight ur parents but if need be he might rough one of them up if things escalate to really like mentally abusive-like proportions. But if it wasn’t that bad, he’ll just console u and help u to feel better no matter what !!
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I hope this came out well!! I’m so happy I’m getting how to fight requests tysm for that, <3 also it ended up kinda long and I lost my train of thought a few times but this felt like an emergency request and when I read those I like when they’re rlly long bc it distracts and comforts me. If it was one I hope ur okay and know u r more than ur grades!!!! ❤️❤️ ty for ur request :))
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bloodbenderz · 4 years
Note
Can I ask what your season 1 Lok reboot looks like?
this is about 3k words i checked lmfao dont say i didnt warn u
a key part of the whole thing is that korra gets way more perspectives and more experiences representative of like, normal people in republic city bc i think something that really defined what a good avatar aang was was how many people he met and got to know and how he didnt exclusively or even mostly associate w cops and bureaucrats and leaders. so mako and bolin. well first of all their backstories are a little more fleshed out and we get a less black and white view of the “triads” (lol) and mako and bolin’s experiences w them. cuz the show very much does the whole thing of like Criminals Bad but dont worry even tho mako and bolin did commit crimes theyre not Criminals!! so just a little more nuance on the alleged gang problem and the poverty in the city
korra does start out very naive w very black and white ideas (ex. “you guys are CRIMINALS?”) i think a really good way of developing her away from her sheltered naive worldview is putting her in whats clearly an incredibly complicated city w an absolute cesspool of political conflicts, ethnic tensions, the lasting effects of colonization, etc and having her try and understand the needs of “the people” in a more complicated way than “i have to save the good guys from the bad guys” ykwim? and i think the absolute WORST way to do that is what they did. bc we get mako and bolin who could contribute genuinely compelling thematic elements to the story: one parent who was indigenous and one who was from a colonizer background in the decades directly following the end of the war, kids who grew up in poverty apparently without any familial support, and who now are trying to be “respectable” members of society (especially mako). and then most of that is pretty much tossed aside bc asami swoops in w her capitalist dad and her piles of money and the class issue is just never talked about again.
so the way i’d fix all that is like. introducing more, like, normal people. some nonbenders, more workers, more immigrants, etc, to show what daily life is actually like for people. because. we dont know! we dont have any context about whether the nonbender oppression thing is actually an issue bc we dont KNOW any nonbenders with normal lives! and spoiler: the nonbender oppression thing is not an issue. bc it doesnt make historical sense. lok is set 7 decades after the end of the war. that is not by ANY stretch of the imagination long enough to heal from the scars of imperialism, ESPECIALLY not when lok is also set in a settler colonial state. like that fact should have featured PROMINENTLY in the political and social setting! realistically, nonbenders arent an oppressed class, earth and water nation people are, regardless of bending status! as in all settler colonial states, the colonizers and their descendants (in this case fire nation people) retain most of the financial and political capital, leaving the colonized and racialized immigrants (in this case earth kingdom and water tribe people respectively) generally impoverished and politically suppressed. like aside from the fact that theres no way toph would have become a cop, it’s so ridiculous to think that an established privileged class of fire nation colonizers would EVER accept being policed by earthbenders!
imagine how much more nuanced and interesting it would be to set republic city as a remnant of a colonial past still fraught w the violence and tension that colonialism and the associated ideology imposed?? instead of some vague ideas of criminal who wear 1920s outfits and harass shopkeepers think about why extralegal and violent groups like that might form! earth kingdom people trying to push for the reclamation of their land? ethnic groups protecting themselves against corrupt cops? ESPECIALLY w the history that the fire nation has of SPECIFICALLY jailing and killing earthbenders and waterbenders BECAUSE of the potential they have to resist against fire nation imperialism like it just makes no sense at all that earthbenders would be privileged on land that, 70 years ago, they would have been imprisoned on! like these various paramilitary groups falling along these different ideological or ethnic lines, fire nation or earth kingdom or water tribe, pro colonization or anti colonization, pro cop or anti cop, pro immigrant or anti immigrant, and then you juxtapose that w depictions of a govt thats failing to keep this all under control w tenzin trying desperately to keep it together despite the fact that it’s becoming increasingly obvious that the state has no interest in taking the conflicts seriously and would rather just point vague fingers at criminals and gangs? and THEN you bring in korra, who has no idea about any of this and thinks that all its gonna take is kicking some ass every couple days, meeting normal people who offer all kinds of different opinions abt the efficacy of the state and the different violent or nonviolent groups and ideologies clashing in the city and the way all this shit is affecting people’s lives and livelihoods and relationships w other citizens??
theres so much good shit there so many incredible things u could do w that like Where do we go after colonial atrocities? is it possible for a settler colonial state to take revolutionary or indigenous ideas seriously? is liberal reform enough in a state like this? and then all the growth that korra could do going from a simple black and white life about mastering the elements to this messy complicated sociopolitical knot of a city? and all the different kinds of characters u could introduce in this city? like why would u EVER think that the most interesting characters that this story has to offer is a police chief a congressman and a billionaire????
but anyways. that’s what the Setting of my idealized version of lok is. as for the actual plot, it is as follows
it starts out similarly as the show. republic city is MUCH more fraught w political tension and violence and korra knows this but assumes that it’s just a matter of throwing a few gang leaders and corrupt officials in jail. tenzin manages to come see them in the south pole and intends give korra real lessons while he’s there but they receive news of a terrorist attack in republic city only a few days after he gets there so his family has to pack up and leave again.
korra stows away to republic city (katara catches her leaving and gives her blessing im a SUCKER for that moment). she does have a hard time adjusting but she doesn’t do what she did in the show lol the first person she meets in the city is this older woman who works on the docks, directs her to a place where she can eat and gives her a roof to sleep under for the first night. so korra’s first exposure to republic city is just about forming connections w ordinary people like ship workers and a family owned restaurant and people practicing their bending in the park. and by the time she reaches air temple island a day or so later her head is spinning w all this new information and the way that nothing is really what she expected it to be. tenzin gives her his own perspective on everything and pema gives her her own perspective on everything and even those two seem wildly different from all the people she’s already met. and so korra starts to get a kind of outline of the conflicts plaguing the city as extremely complex and a lot more influenced by older ideas of fire nation imperialism and earth kingdom land reclamation than she had any idea about.
mako and bolin are still pro benders but not like. super famous like they are in the show. korra’s picked up a couple friends by now and one of them takes her to a gym where a lot of amateur pro bending (is that an oxymoron? lol) matches happen and thats how she meets mako and bolin and joins their pro bending team. Unfortunately for korra, this gym is run by lin beifong, and also has the distinction of being one of the most notoriously anti settler state organizations in the country. lin beifong is NOT a cop but she runs this gym (and the pro bending league) as a way to offer support to local earth kingdom/water tribe youth, teach self defense skills, a center of community organizing, and sometimes to act as a front to hide revolutionary/combat organizing against the pro fire nation paramilitaries/police force. tenzin is DISTRAUGHT that korra does this and this is where the friction btwn them comes from bc (from tenzin’s perspective) she does things like this without thinking or even fully understanding the context behind them and tenzin will have to deal w the political fallout of the avatar openly aligning herself w a very divisive figure in the community and (from korra’s perspective) tenzin is too unwilling to take sides in a conflict that’s claiming lives and when the state is clearly not taking sufficient steps to protect people well then why the hell shouldnt she align herself w lin beifong, who IS taking steps to protect and support people?
as korra more fully integrates herself into the city and learns more abt how different people think abt everything going on this is where the real exposition abt the equalists begins. they’re a paramilitary group w an ideology thats gaining increasing support among middle/upper class fire nation people, esp nonbenders. on the face theyre abt putting checks on “bender oppression” but really it’s an excuse to persecute and surveil earthbenders waterbenders and airbenders, bc fire nation people have all this leftover fear about benders who arent fire nation Rising Up Against them and these people who r using their Savage Excuse for Bending to terrorize good innocent (fire nation) people. theres all too frequent terrorist attacks that the equalists claim credit for mostly against monuments to earth/water/air nation people and earth/water nation community centers (one like it was the event that forced tenzin back to republic city) but also like the govt doesnt take a lot of these seriously or if they do only a couple people are charged without doing damage to the entire organization
this is also around the time that they meet asami and she becomes part of their friend group. asami likes pro bending but her dad HATES it so she sneaks out to watch matches at lin beifong’s gym (korra says ironically like don’t u know how ~divisive~ that is and asami answers that the only reason its Not divisive is that gyms like beifongs are the only place where nobody recognizes her). and asami alongside korra is also kind of developing a more nuanced perspective on the city that she lives in cuz obviously the only worldview she’s ever been exposed to is her father’s right? and she keeps pushing it off making excuses not to bring mako and bolin and korra around to her house or even not to be seen w them in certain neighborhoods until they call her on it and she’s like Well honestly my dad might do something awful to u! and i dont wanna risk it!
and as time goes on we see more abt asami’s home life like her father’s hyper conservative politics and asami keeps these secrets abt her hobbies and her friends from him but she’s still clearly under his influence and mako bolin and korra r getting increasingly worried abt it cuz like...asami seems to tend to make excuses for him so that she wont have to be drawn into conflict and originally they think its just her being privileged and thats def part of it but the more they find out abt it the more they realize what a tight fucking grip he has on her and the way that like. asami sneaking out once or twice a week is the Only thing she does for herself. and it really starts freaking them out how influential this billionaire is and all the information theyre getting from asami abt what a piece of shit he clearly is. and so that whole plot thing comes about and shows us how deeply embedded these “equalist” ideas are in conservative republic city politics and how much influence theyre actually having in policy making and law enforcement.
asami suffers in the aftermath of this like being forced to truly confront the harm her father is doing both to the city and to herself. and she ends up leaving home when this discovery really breaks. but bc of the deep corruption in govt and police sato isn’t really....dealt with? like this big story breaks and everyones like Oh, My God! Hiroshi Sato Is Funding An Illegal Paramilitary Group! and theres all kinds of inane political discourse about it and he’s arrested but he bails himself out immediately and his finances are examined but he maintains control over them and after a few weeks the gang (bc they Have become close among all this w much less interpersonal drama lol) has to admit that this news story hasnt done what they thought it was going to it hasn’t dealt the equalists a real hit its just given them a very high profile ally
and this is when things really start to ramp up in terms of action like up until now korra’s daily activities are mostly like hanging around in the city w her friends  (which in part entails doing little avatar stuff that people dont feel comfortable going to police with, like Can you help me my ex husband wont pay child support or Please help i got robbed and i really needed that money for rent next month or Help my son keeps skipping school can you talk to him cuz im worried abt him being safe and doing well in school) and pro bending and airbending lessons (which i know ive neglected this part of the story in terms of her whole spiritual/physical conflict but it’s more of a subtle thing like it’s one of tenzin and korra’s more frequent arguments like tenzin says she needs to focus on spirituality and korra asks why she even needs to bc republic city is a sociopolitical problem not a spiritual one) but now the equalist threat seems to really be looming on every level of society like the storyline of equalists preventing pro bending matches happens here and everyones just at a total loss of what to do next. plus increasing and scary rhetoric about tenzin and his family that destroying the last airbenders is necessary to preserving the integrity of the united republic
and so theres the equalist takeover of the city. the people who are mostly resisting this are lin and ragtag group of people who have been resisting colonial rule for a long time (including suyin, who is part of a communist anti colonial community outside the city, because i said so and i think it would be fun), people who have been visiting her gym for years, members of her amateur pro bending league, plus asami and korra and tenzin. korra and tenzin have a sweet moment (bc they do genuinely care abt each other a lot even if their relationship has been marked w a lot of tension and arguing) where tenzin says like you know i think that ive lost focus on the kind of spirituality that might actually help you. korra says what do you mean? and tenzin kind of gestures to where theyre sitting with people buzzing around organizing to take care of innocents and civilians and to fight the equalists and he says this is a kind of spiritual too, isnt it?
and something something plot plot blah blah i havent decided on the details of the plot climax yet but that’s the climax of korra’s character development and what helps her connect w her spiritual side in order to protect the city: the realization that community is its own kind of spirituality. and it kind of represents the real development that i want her to have going from somebody who thinks that the world is divided into criminals and victims and she has to save the victims Into the kind of avatar who understands the people that she’s bound to serve. she becomes an avatar of the people!
and then happy ending lol korra and asami get together lin and tenzin reconcile after years of being at odds the show ends on a hopeful note that the inhabitants of republic city and the united republic as a whole Can move on from the scars of colonialism by reckoning w the remnants of fire nation colonial ideology and reparations to the earth kingdom people whose land this is and destruction of colonial systems that have maintained and enforced colonial violence all these years
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mst3kproject · 3 years
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The Giant of Marathon
For some reason, probably because I've seen them all so many times, I thought I'd already done all four Film Crew episodes.  Evidently this is not true.  Here's one, and if you haven't seen it... wow, Mr. Honcho was not exaggerating about the thousands of sweaty men.
Philippides of Athens is the greatest athlete there is, having won the entire Olympics. With the games over, he returns to his day job as commander of the Athenian city guard.  Followers of Hippias the exiled tyrant are plotting to take control of the city with help from the invading Persians, and they try to seduce Philippides to their cause by offering him wine, women, and homoerotic wrestling (it was ancient Greece, after all).  Philippides refuses to be seduced, and sets off to secure the help of Athens' old enemy Sparta in opposing the Persians.  His mission is a success, but upon his return a spy tells him that the Persians are planning a sneak attack on the harbour of Piraeus.  Can even Philippides get there in time to deliver the warning?
I don't actually know if it were possible to win the entire Olympics in ancient Greece.  I know there were several events and at least one of them involved reciting poetry.  The Battle of Marathon was in 490 BC and a table on Wikipedia suggests that there could have been up to twelve different sports, but some of them were only for children.
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The Giant of Marathon touts itself as a tale of epic battles, daring deeds, and political machinations.  I'll get back to the epic battles and daring deeds, but what stands in for the political machinations is mostly a bunch of people pining.  Unimpressive villain Theocritus is pining for the beautiful Andromeda, whose father has promised her to him but she thinks he's a dick.  She's pining for Philippides, who is also pining for her but thinks she's one of Hippias' followers, so refuses to speak to her.  Meanwhile Theocritus' concubine Charis is also pining for Philippides because he's the only man who ever refused to fuck her, I think.
These relationships are important to the plot, too.  Andromeda's love for Philippides is one of the reasons her father refuses to join the traitors, and when Theocritus realizes he cannot have her, he ties her to the prow of his ship to force Philippides to watch her die.  Charis' crush on Philippides leads her to her death, as she is executed for spying.  Yet none of it is ever developed beyond 'these two pretty people saw each other and now they want to bone'.  Philippides declares his love for Andromeda after a single five-minute interaction.  Charis has seen Philippides twice, and both times it went badly, when she decides to betray Theocritus.
Why do the writers hang such important plot points on the 'love' between people who have barely spoken to each other?  I can't decide if it's because they're lazy, or because they're hacks, and I lean towards a combination of the two.  There is absolutely no subtlety to the writing in The Giant of Marathon at all.  Everything is told, not shown.  We know that Theocritus and Creusus are traitors because they talk about it, in dialogue that's clearly written for the audience, not as anything that sounds like a natural conversation. We know that Charis and Andromeda are both in love with Philippides because they say so.  The only thing we're really shown is that Andromeda hates Theocritus, which comes through in her body language (though we are also very much told), so props to actress Mylène Demongeot for that much.
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The movie doesn't care about any of this character stuff, anyway.  It just wants to get straight to those epic battle scenes, and it's very obvious how much work and time went into those as opposed to everything else.  The battles are lengthy and elaborate, full of impressive stunts and props and miniatures being destroyed all over the place.  We get to see Persian chariots run down Greek infantry, and while I'm pretty sure this would have been orchestrated so the stuntmen didn't get hurt, I'm not nearly so confident about the unfortunate horses (and neither was Bill).  There are ships in flames and injured men screaming as they fall overboard.  There are even some pretty good deaths, like the guy who was hit in the eye with an arrow.  The desperate last stand of the city guard against the entire Persian fleet, with the Spartans arriving just in time to save the day, is very tense indeed.
I get the impression that this is what somebody really wanted to put on screen, and they did a decent job of it, but pretty much the entire rest of what ought to be the story is just an accessory to the fighting stuff.  It's as if the film-makers wanted so badly for their fight sequences to be epic that they forgot what makes epic-ness – which is the characters and their stake in the events. We don't know any of these people, none of them have anything we might call a personality trait, and so we don't care.
The focus on how epic it all is makes I seem a little strange that the battle ends on a shot of dead Persian guys floating in the water. You'd think they'd want to end with something that more decisively shows the Athenian victory, maybe the men cheering as the Persian ships turn around and flee.  Or perhaps some kind of victory celebration, which could mirror the celebration of Philippides winning the Olympics in the opening and call back to the scene where Philippides asks the goddess Athena to protect her city.
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Instead, we cut to a shot of Philippides and Andromeda walking across the farmland together.  This feels a little too sudden, and is also a poor fit with the rest of the movie.  The only time we've seen Philippides on his farm is when he's gotten disgusted with the politics of Athens and returned to the countryside to sulk.  If the farm is supposed to be a place where he's happy and at peace, the movie never establishes it.
So that's political machinations and epic battle sequences, let's talk about some daring deeds.
Unlike the Hercules and Maciste movies we've seen in the past, The Giant of Marathon wants to be grounded in real-life history.  This means that while the script does reference gods and mythical heroes, none of them ever appear and there is no hint of them working behind the scenes to bring events about.  Likewise, Philippides is not a demigod, so we avoid several of the tropes associated with the genre.  Nothing important ever happens (or fails to happen) because the hero was asleep, and he never bends prison bars or drinks a love potion – although a love potion is mentioned, as if to draw attention to this.
This doesn't leave Philippides a whole lot of scope for daring deeds, and when they try the results are a little lackluster.  His main feat is, of course, running all the way from Marathon to Athens (the proverbial forty-two kilometres) to let them know of the impending attack, but while this ought to be the highlight of the movie it's shot in terrible day-for-night and we have nothing to suggest how far this is... I think the writers just assumed everybody knows the length of a marathon.  If we'd seen the army tired from making the march earlier, we would have a better sense of it being a long and tiring journey even at a walk or with horses, and it would seem that much more formidable as a distance for one man to cover before sunrise.  Of course, showing us these things is apparently beyond the scope of The Giant of Marathon's writers, but you'd think they could at least have a character say something like, “it's twenty-six miles!  He'll never make it!”
His other major daring deed is when he pushes giant boulders down a hill onto the attacking Persians.  This is kind of weird because Philippides is not Hercules or Maciste.  He's good at track and field, but we haven't seen any evidence of him having godlike strength, and this is a universe where gods don't seem to do much anyway, so it comes out of nowhere.  The rocks are huge – there are similarly-sized ones at the park near my house and I know one guy couldn't move them no matter how buff he might be.  Did somebody just forget that they weren't making a Hercules movie?
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Between the battles and the various plot twists, The Giant of Marathon could have been a pretty fun sword-and-sandal movie, but it's like a tower without a foundation.  The fights have nothing to hold them up, so we just can't get into it. Also, what the Underworld happened to Hippias? We see him once, chatting with the king of Persia, and then he vanishes and the movie decides weaselly little Theocritus is the big bad instead. I'm sorry, but if you've got a character with a name as cool as 'Hippias the Tyrant', you really can't just drop him like that.
The Best Brains liked to complain about the tinyness of the costumes in these movies but honestly, nothing here is as off-putting as actual ancient Greek sports would have been to the modern viewer.  When I was in university I TA'd for a course called Introduction to Greco-Roman Civilization. It was an adventure in several ways – the students were mostly dumb freshmen who spent the lectures playing Farmville, and the professor didn't give a shit because she'd just been denied tenure.  I don't know how much anybody learned in that class, but I'm sure they all recall how, after the professor told us that Greek athletes stripped naked and covered themselves in olive oil before wrestling, somebody raised a hand and asked if they removed their body hair.  The professor cheerfully told him that they did not, so next time we see a Greek vase we ought to remember that these guys were much sweatier, oilier, and hairier than terra cotta can possibly convey.
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robininthelabyrinth · 4 years
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Sooo I know I’m abusing the power you gave me (let me send prompts) but I’ve a very good reason, I promise (I’ve Nie brothers feelings and I love your writing) and I need to ask for this “5 times everyone realises that actually NMJ is the pushover in the Nie brothers relationship bc let’s be honest NMJ let’s NHS get away with everything and every time NMJ tries to get NHS to do something he has to bribe him with fans or resign himself to never get that done” and I find that hilarious :p
1
“Your sons have quite a good relationship, Sect Leader Nie,” Jiang Fengmian remarked, but the man didn’t look especially impressed by the compliment.
“Especially given that they’re half-brothers,” Jin Guangshan added, and Jiang Fengmian sighed internally: the addition made the original statement into a taunt, which hadn’t been what he meant at all. “Rare to see such a good relationship in such cases.”
“Would you know?” Wen Ruohan asked, smiling poisonously. “And here I thought you had only one.”
“I’ve tasted pork; I don’t need to know how to butcher a pig. Look at how the older one lets the younger one around follow him around everywhere – certainly I wouldn’t have tolerated such a thing for one so much younger than me.”
“I always liked playing with others,” Jiang Fengmian said mildly. “The bigger the family, the better, in my view…it’s nice to help and be helped.”
“I don’t think the infant being carried around is doing that much helping,” Lan Qiren observed.
“And yet he’s clearly the one calling the shots,” Wen Ruohan mused, his eyes settling on the field where the two were playing – or rather, the toddler was demanding a ride and his older brother complying. “Given how stiff-necked the Nie family is, traditionally, it must be very reassuring to you, Sect Leader Nie, to see your son so – compliant.”
Sect Leader Nie abruptly changed the subject.
Later, he came to Jiang Fengmian, an expression of fury on his face. “It’s not any of my business, so I don’t care what’s going on with your search for that servant of yours and his family,” he said icily. “But I’ll thank you to focus on rearing your own children, and stop drawing unwanted attention to mine.”
Jiang Fengmian felt rather unjustly accused. It was true, he’d been thinking of Wei Changze’s son – of how well he’d get along with his own A-Cheng, if only Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren could be convinced to stop traveling around and come home for a little – but there was no reason for old Nie to be so snippy. There had only been the five great sect leaders around; what was he so worried about?
2
“You can’t be serious,” Lan Xichen said, pressing his lips together to try to restrain his laughter and altogether incapable of restraining his smile.
His smile only grew when Nie Mingjue’s shoulders rose up somewhere around his ears in embarrassment.
“I don’t see what the problem is,” he replied stiffly, and then he actually bought the – product.
Lan Xichen managed to hold himself back as they continued down the shopping street, and finally when they were back on the unoccupied path back to the Unclean Realm he let out a peal of laughter.
Nie Mingjue shot him a sidelong glare.
“Little Huaisang has you completely under his thumb,” Lan Xichen laughed. “You’re always buying him things, every time I see you – if it’s not new fans to add to his collections, it’s another animal for his little menagerie –”
“It’s not a menagerie.”
“He has a half-dozen birds, a mated pair of pangolins, and that – that beast you got for him –”
“The boar?” Nie Mingjue asked. “I didn’t buy that, I found it, and anyway the plan is to release it back onto the mountain once it gets a little larger.”
Lan Xichen waved his hand, dismissing Nie Mingjue’s little technicalities. “All that’s fair enough,” he says, laughter still in his voice and his eyes still curved up into crescents. “I would buy Wangji anything he liked, if only he had more hobbies. But even I would draw the line at purchasing my little brother erotic art.”
“He likes it,” Nie Mingjue said defensively.
“Oh, I’m sure he does,” Lan Xichen said, trying to move his eyebrows suggestively like he’d seen someone do once. Judging from Nie Mingjue’s mildly horrified expression, he wasn’t successful. “Still, don’t you think you’re sending him mixed messages? On one hand, you’re always yelling at him about not practicing his saber enough, and on the other you’re spoiling him rotten –”
“He hasn’t formed a golden core yet,” Nie Mingjue said abruptly, and Lan Xichen’s smiled faded. “Yes, still. It’s late, no matter what standard you hold him to – forget the Great Sects, forget regular sects, even by the children of rogue cultivators usually have the basics of a core by now.”
Lan Xichen didn’t know what to say. Lan Wangji had formed his core very early, earliest out of all his generation in fact – he had never had to worry about his brother’s cultivation, not once.
He wanted to tell his friend not to worry, that it would come in time, that Nie Huaisang would catch up…but he was right, it was late. In another year, they would be sending out invitations for select people to come study at the Cloud Recesses, where Nie Huaisang had been a few times before, but this time would be the first time all the sect heirs were in a single place.
If he didn’t have his core by then, there was a chance he’d never get it. That he’d live only the short life of a common person, shorter even than the shortened life of a Nie cultivator –
That Nie Mingjue would have to watch his baby brother grow old and send him off first.
“So I buy him things,” Nie Mingjue concluded with shrug that was anything but casual. “More things than he needs. If he finally forms a core, there’ll be time enough then to teach him discipline – and if he doesn’t, well. At least he’ll be happy for the few years he’ll have.”
3
“The answer is still no,” Nie Mingjue said, just he had said the first few times, and without paying the slightest attention to the table Jiang Cheng had just overturned.
“Why not?” Jiang Cheng snarled, incensed. “If we join forces together and win, we’ll strike a blow against the Wens that will be felt across the land –”
“And if we lose, the damage will be incalculable,” Nie Mingjue said, unmoved. He didn’t look up from the correspondence he was reviewing. “We didn’t come here expecting to find a Wen stronghold; neither of us brought enough people. No.”
Jiang Cheng sneered. “We didn’t bring enough people, no, but there are enough at hand if there weren’t exceptions being made.”
Nie Mingjue paused and finally put down the letter, turning to look at Jiang Cheng. “If you have something to say, just say it.”
“Nie Huaisang isn’t that far away, with plenty of cultivators acting as guards at his side,” Jiang Cheng said, crossing his arms. “If you summoned them, we’d have enough to tip the scales in our favor. But you don’t, just because he doesn’t feel like fighting – why do you let him walk all over you?!”
Nie Mingjue looked at him for a long moment, his gaze dark and angry.
Jiang Cheng began to feel as if he’d made a mistake, but it was too late to retract his harsh words.
“Very well,” Nie Mingjue said, and Jiang Cheng began to brighten. “I’ll write to Meishan while I’m at it; your sister can come bring along the ones who are guarding her, too.”
Jiang Cheng blanched. “You can’t! Jiejie can’t –”
“Why not? Her cultivation is mediocre, but no more so than my brother’s,” Nie Mingjue said, and he was very angry. “Or are you going to say that she’s the only one left in your family but you? That you don’t want the Wens to have a chance to take even more of your family away? Isn’t all that just as true for me?!”
Jiang Cheng hung his head.
“We’re fighting this war to win it,” Nie Mingjue said. “There’s no point in winning if we lose everything on the way. Get out and talk a walk; I don’t want to see you until you’ve beaten some sense into that thick head of yours.”
4
“Da-ge, you know you can’t keep the secret of the saber spirits from Huaisang forever,” Jin Guangyao said, and his voice was reasonable as it always was – calm and even and to the point, just the way that Nie Mingjue had liked so much when he’d been his deputy.
The tone mostly just irritated Nie Mingjue now – but then, most things did, these days.
“I’m aware of that,” Nie Mingjue said, scowling. His fingers were pressing at his temples – another headache, it seemed. They were happening more and more these days, and that didn’t help the quality of his temper one bit. “He doesn’t need to know all the details yet. He’ll have to bear the burden eventually, but – not yet.”
Jin Guangyao chuckled. “You always let what he wants make decisions for you, da-ge.”
Nie Mingjue ignored him. That was normal, too.
“Let me play for you again, da-ge,” Jin Guangyao said, and his smile broadened. “It might help your headache.”
5
Wei Wuxian was of the opinion that disturbing the unquiet corpses that had been sealed in the Guanyin Temple in Yunping City was a terrible idea, but sometimes you had to make sacrifices when politics became an issue. The once-more-ascendant-Nie-sect-is-asking-only-somewhat-politely sort of politics.
Every once in a while, Wei Wuxian cursed Nie Mingjue in the back of his mind. Surely, if he hadn’t spoiled Nie Huaisang so much, he wouldn’t have become so demanding – so insistent!
(So incredibly good at finding just the right weak spot to press on…!)
“Your brother is still going to be a fierce corpse when we open that thing,” he said. “You know that, right? He didn’t recognize you then, he won’t recognize you now – he’s an extremely powerful fierce corpse, which is going to make it very hard to control him right away. There’s a great deal of danger involved in being here.”
Nie Huaisang nodded. “I appreciate the warning, Wei-xiong.”
“In light of that,” Wei Wuxian continued. “Don’t you think you should watch from further away?”
“I’m fine. Thank you for your concern.”
Wei Wuxian sighed and lifted Chenqing to his lips, nodding at Lan Wangji, and together they set about unsealing the tomb.
Nie Mingjue’s corpse was just as overwhelming as he remembered, bursting out of the tomb a few moments before they expected it, and the backlash was enough to make Wei Wuxian, with his weak golden core in this life, cough up blood, which in turn made Lan Wangji stop everything to look at him, which meant that there was nothing between Nie Mingjue’s outstretched fingers, curled into claws, and Nie Huaisang, standing there with nothing but a fan in hand.
Wei Wuxian opened his mouth to – he didn’t know what, to try something to save someone who really had once been his friend, however he’d ended up and whatever he’d done, and who he still rather liked and who’d had pretty good reasons for things and who at any rate he didn’t want to see dead at the hands of his own brother –
Nie Mingjue’s clawed fingers stopped only a hair’s breadth away from Nie Huaisang’s head.
Wei Wuxian’s breath caught in his throat.
A moment passed, and then another – and then the direction of Nie Mingjue’s hand shifted, and he ran his fingers through Nie Huaisang’s hair with a delicacy that Wei Wuxian, an expert on all things resentful energy, had never thought a white-eyed fierce corpse was capable of.
Nie Huaisang smiled, content. “Da-ge has always let me get away with everything.”
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