#because this show bangs so much so im being picky
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ok sorry for being a hater but i will say that im kinda disappointed marcille wasnt bloodier and grimier in the new ep. like i need my girl disheveled and dirty and looking like a used tampon. and i know that a lot of it is animation constraints but i dont think it would have been that much of a problem to just add a little more blood? idk. i really liked the ep overall and im happy with it i just wish marcille was more disheveled because it literally represents how far shes willing to go to save falin. its the shocking contrast to before. marcille being grimy and covered in dragon guts is essential to the yuri!!!
#also. well#this is trigger. and. u know. female characters in anime#it does smell a tiny bit like we cant make her too ugly she has to still be appealing. which is more of a general problem with anime i guess#let the girls get ugly and gross…..at least make the blood go up past her ankles#yeah im being a hater but its because i care#because this show bangs so much so im being picky#trigger is doing an amazing job but thats why i complain u know. out of love
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hi there, haven’t been able to write all that much lately which bums me out but i wanted to share a story of mine i think some of you may be interested in.
if anyone here doesn’t know, im experienced within sex and im a very erotic person online as well as in real life. i haven’t had many sexual partners but with the partners i had been with, ive done a lot of experimenting. i wanted to share the first time i used a strap on a girl and the embarrassment that held within that.
during the springtime after my birthday, i had taken upon myself to invest in a strap on. i would always jokingly look on sites like adam and eve, window shopping at all the ones id like to get, feeling as if id never be able to, mostly cause i was scared shitless of my parents finding out that their offspring was buying a sex toy, let alone a fucking strap on. i went to spencers where they had a very limited selection, i wasn’t too picky, even though i stood in that section for god knows how long. it was a gummy purple five inch dildo, with a black harness that felt like a belt of a car— it was rough, complicated and left my skin feeling like i had rug burn. maybe it was because i didn’t know how to properly put it on or maybe the material was just that shitty… i don’t have it anymore so i can’t really test that theory.
my girlfriend at the time and i were very awkward with one another, we couldn’t even look at each other without geeking out and needing to squeal but when i had sex with her the first time (without the strap) it wasn’t as bad as i thought it would be. i was lucky enough to have a good enough tongue and a perverted mind where my hands would touch all over her like she was gold. the lead into that was funny though… i kept laughing and hesitating to do things like kiss her neck, touch her thighs… even taking her bra off, my hands were sweating and it seemed like the clip could not budge. i accidentally hit her nose (twice i might add) and i was not able to use dirty talk for the life of me… i hated my voice and saying ‘baby’ to her during a time like this made myself want to cringe knowing that i was able to hear what she could. but as we eased our way into it, the better it became and the more relaxed we started to be. by the point of me getting the strap, we had sexted two nights before, me being confident thinking i can totally ace the work of a strap on due to the numerous homemade lesbian porn videos of women straight banging their scene partners. she didn’t know i would buy one and she didn’t even mind the idea that we’d never even use one, but i got so turned on by the image of me using it on her so i worked on impulse and got it.
as the weekend approached, i believe the last day i was going to spend the night, i showed it to her. she giggled so hard, covering her face, telling me how she couldn’t believe i owned one. she was more excited than i thought she would’ve been and it only built the start of my ego to think id be any good at using it. thing was… my anxiety began to rise as things got more intimate. i felt like i couldn’t kiss her correctly and touching her body felt like my first time, shaking hands, constant deep inhales, and i would stutter, tripping over my touch as i tried talking sexy to her.
putting it on in front of her felt like i was being watched by the devil in the depths of hell… maybe even deeper— my body was so hot, i couldn’t stop trembling and i almost dropped it i think three times. she was nervous too and with the lack of communication it didn’t help much of anything.
i didn’t know how to start… i knew to prep her with my mouth and fingers and lube but as i started, it took so many times to get it inside of her… i kept saying i was sorry, asking her if she was okay and the frustration on my face was enough to almost break the mood. with her laying on her back, i finally got myself inside of her. moving my hips felt like i was pushing a bolder— they were so stiff and inconsistent. they got sore so fucking quick and i ended up stopping so many times just to ease the tension. it felt like hours and nothing was progressing and took into account that maybe using a strap was not something id ever use again. she didn’t cum from it so i just took it off, feeling embarrassed and stupid for not looking into how to use the damn thing. i just continued to do what i usually did and left it at that.
as some of you may know i value my partners pleasure and even if they’re satisfied, i strive to be better and with that night alone, i thought of the worst… i thought she was going to break up with me. i thought she wouldn’t think of me as this could person she’d always seen. i felt like i had ruined myself and there was no fixing it. i thought she was going to hate me. fortunately, all of my worries were resolved by her saying it was okay.
the next time we used it was probably a half a month later and it worked better… to put it lightly. she did cum from it and that eased me up by a million. i still didn’t think id be able to use it as much as i wanted and with her i almost didn’t. i was too worried thinking that id be worst than the first time and each time we had sex i thought she’d view me in a way that i was unable to pleasure her. as time continued and i let that worry slip, build up my strength in my hips and my stamina, it got better.
that’s pretty much it i guess… im too lazy to go too much in depth but for people saying im a sex god… i wanted people to know that i most definitely was NOT one. i was a shy, eager and anxious dude and with that girl, i felt like my sex performance was the most lackluster… if you want any more stories about my experience… you can ask, im gladly willing to share.
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JUYEON :: GAME CATERERS x SVT | 02
[editors captions] | speaking
warning: food mentions
for context, during the filming of game caterers she was blonde. she dyed her hair again soon after.
ep 2-1
jinny's first part is in like the first few seconds lmao
she was wandering around with hoshi & vernon
she was third in the shop line behind hoshi
for her task, jinny had to name a foreign candy brand
[ (Foodie gets a question right up her alley ) ]
she named the first american one she could think of and took the earth arcade plushie [we'll pretend dk took something else..]
[ (Can you spot the difference between her and Torong?) ]
you can see her sitting with woozi & watching jun eat the lemons !!
then after she goes around and lays in the grass with hoshi & shua with her prize
[ Jinny joins them with Torong ]
she doesn't go again after getting her prize but she does sit and watch
jinny didn't talk much soo there wasn't that much of her here
when myungho did the relay & went to the back, the camera zoomed into her telling him you're so cute, gēgē~
[ (Winner compliments another winner) ]
jinny : [when seungkwan said wwksb to dino] seungkwannie.. stop being open minded..
jinny can be seen sitting with the others a couple of times but for the most part she just sits there quietly talking to the members
there was a cut of her talking about torong to a staff member saying how cute it was and how happy she was to get it
the staff was looking at her so fondly..
everyone loves jinny :sob:
her last scenes were her walking into the break room, sitting with jeonghan, and laying her head on his shoulder
she also helped clean the spill !!
[ (Was laying down right next to the mess) ]
[ (Stood up second) ]
thats it for 2-1
ep 2-2
PLEASE this was made for jinny omg.
she was on hoshi & seungkwans team because she grabbed hoshi by reflex LMAO
she sat in the middle
yes there could have been 7 teams of 2 but idc.
jinny : ["why are you disappointed?"] don't be disappointed, oppa~ we'll lead you to victory!
[ (Holding hands as they go) ]
[ Dramatic/Torong/Tiger ]
jinny : ["were you attracted to your partner by instinct?"] woah.. we totally were..
seungkwan : why does that sound so sarcastic..
jinny : don't worry about it. [eng]
she made everyone laughksejrjhuih
[ (These three are notorious for teaming up against one another) ]
[ (Today they're working together) ]
for the flaws hoshi & seungkwan agreed on the fact that jinny argues too much on shows LMAO [playfully..]
jinny : a flaw? hm. for seungkwan-oppa, he's too picky.. and for hoshi-oppa, he's, like, obsessed with tigers..
she can be seen a few times talking with seungkwan & hoshi and yells the slogan with them
jinny smiled so big when pd said it was a music quiz
[ K-pop professors at MIT ]
jun / woozi : that's what seungkwan and jinny are good at
[ (K-pop prof) (K-pop producer) (Performance Team leader) ]
[ The best players teamed up ]
hoshi : shinee
seungkwan : sher -
jinny : - lock!
my boosoonyeon crumbs i love them
jinny ate that dance up let me tell you.
[ (Living up to their team name) ]
jinny : i would've been disappointed if we didn't get that, the dance is engraved in my brain
[ (They did a cover of the song for MAMA 2018) ]
[ (And again at the HYBE Family Picnic) ]
yes im writing that cover in because we all know svt would absolutely end if they covered sherlock
she got up so fast for stayc !!! yoon's jinny biased btw.. (luckiest carat ever?)
they didn't get it but she still danced
jinny : ASAP!!
[ (Jinny) (Wrote a song on this album) ]
[ (Punch) ] [ (Punch) ]
when drink less and talk more said the 4th (5th? i forgot pls) it was seventeen she was so confused LMAO
jinny : really? thats seventeen? baby you helped make this song.
[ (JINNY) (Composed most of SEVENTEEN's songs) ]
[ ('CLAP' composed by JINNY) ]
[ They didn't recognize their own child? ]
please jinny just banged her head on the table in disappointment
giving jinsoul hitting her head..
hoshi / seungkwan : ..??? are you okay ???
[ (Disappointed in herself) ]
jinny : ["jinny, what happened?"] i..have no words. you cheated me. [eng]
shua and vernon were giggling.
jinny : ["but someone still got it"] still!
5th song!! you already KNOW jinny jumped up from her seat
the three of them are still splitting the songs into three syllables sobbing
[ ('Hype Boy' produced by JINNY) ]
[ (I'll dance over here then) ]
she was still close to the table and they went to the far right side...
[ (Let's play together) ]
jinny : i love this song. newjeans, i love you. [eng]
[ (A message for the bunnies) ]
jinny : seungkwannie, you just embarrassed yourself in front of the camera..
jinny : don't cut that out please!
[ (Don't worry Jinny, we won't) ]
the amount of force jinny hit hoshi with at txt istg.
she was sitting not paying attention and then all she hears is "run for you"...
the second time around she was the one who said run away
cause she didn't trust hoshi LMAO
[ (Jinny, who's brother is a TXT member) ]
[ (Disappointed in her teammate, but still dances with charm) ]
that was her last scene bcz she took a bathroom break and then got carried away while getting a snack.. yes she confirmed it herself..
#svt ; jinny#svt au#svt oc#seventeen female addition#seventeen female member#seventeen addition#seventeen added member#seventeen 14th member#kpop extra member#kpop female oc#kpop added member#kpop addition#kpop oc#fake kpop idol#idol!oc#idol!au#idol oc
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https://www.tumblr.com/struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor/733626243826794496/im-sure-geffen-couldve-done-more-but-it-also?source=share
Won't sugar coat anything since you don't like back handed things I'll say i agree with anon. some of the relies that you gave to these chart related things shows that you are not that much around the charts of these songs so you don't know much. Just like anon said Geffen is their company who restocks Albums for all the members so they shouldn't be picky about who's CDs they restock and who's don't. All memebrs should be given same level of support atleast act based on the demand? Cause i remember them not restocking LC from 7months till now and just yesterday Along with v, yg (idk if other members' CD were released or not) that too just 235 without any notice and that too got sold out within 5min. They have been restocking seven's CDs for so many times since it's released even tho the previous CDs were not sold out in the first place so how you gonna restock CDs of a song who's previous CDs are right there without moving sells but the fans are tagging and almost beginning you to restock LC but you didn't move your finger at all?? How does that makes sense to U? Then you say it makes sense this and that like if the demand is there why you as a company won't fullfil it???
What doesn't make sense is the idea that Geffen is showing preferential treatment. If they are, it's from a business perspective. I don't even know the point of this post. I mean, not restocking albums impacts charting, right? I didn't consider that, because, like you said, I don't know much about charts and don't keep up with stuff like this when it comes to BTS. I occasionally see these types of posts but not often.
However, you don't have to restock an album only when it sells out. If you have a huge hit, or a song with huge potential, like Seven, you restock it so it never sells out and you keep making a profit.
Obviously, there is demand for Layover and Face so I don't know why the CDs weren't restocked. Are the suppliers the same? I don't know about these things, but if the company chose to only restock Seven because they had to prioritize it, then it also makes sense because Seven was literally one of the biggest songs of the year. But they should be able to restock all their biggest artists. I don't know. But the thing is, there are also things you don't know, on Geffen's side?
Like, yeah, Jungkook is being promoted a lot more and on a bigger scale, and from the remixes to discounted albums, etc. they're going all out on every level to support him. But SB and Bang PD are using him as a pilot for their US expansion so there's that. However, all of this is business? Businesses can be terribly incompetent and Hybe for sure is sometimes but these people know how to make money so it's weird that everyone's making it seem like the members aren't being given a chance to best Jungkook because Jungkook is getting preferential treatment. If they thought Jimin could do better than JK, they would've promoted him more, but I doubt Jimin wanted to do everything Jungkook has been doing or releasing an English pop album, and without that...
Okay, I'm done with these posts because I keep saying the same things over and over again and don't even understand what I'm defending anymore. I'm also unsure of my own opinion. I don't even know what's right or wrong right now.
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I have been diagnosed with bpd for a few years now but im scared it might actually be a misdiagnosis for autism. I have been reading how a lot of high functioning, high masking autistic women get misdiagnosed with bpd instead because it looks too similar. I’m very dependant on my noise canceling headphone, cant leave the house without them, i get really nervous and overstimulated in spaces like public transport or malls, and sometimes i feel these breakdowns/meltdowns coming and i need to isolate myself from the world not to embarrass myself, if they happen in public i usually end up snapping and saying mean things to people i love or crying in public etc just because im overstimulated. Usually happens after a long day of being out in public, in crowded spaces, after lots of interaction etc. I’ve never been good with people or making friends and I get really upset when plans change last minute. But then again I dont think i have any special interests, im not a picky eater, i love traveling by myself and trying new things. Im not sure how to bring this up to my therapist or address it because i dont fit the stereotypical picture they’ve created with shows like Big bang theory :/
there's so much ignorance and stereotyping surrounding autism. all the more so when it comes to adult women and afab identities. i ofc am not fit to give you a diagnosis of any kind, but i can speak from my own experience, and i can tell you that i also have bpd (shifting erratic sense of self, impulsive possibly destructive behavior when triggered, black-or-white vision especially when the mental health is not great, splitting when needs or expectations are not met etc.) but, from independently looking a bit into autism (thanks to informed activists online), I've been able to relate to a few traits. i even talked to my sister about it (the person who knows me best on this entire earth) and she was like. "hm. makes sense. not surprised". 😭😭😭 so i always say i have "a few autistic traits" (namely the seeking of comfort and repetitive rituals, loath to change, prone to sensory overload when overstimulated, hyperfixation on interests, chronic boredom unless my mind is entertained, need to recharge after a social event, etc.), but i myself dont feel confident enough to say i am autistic because i am still highly functional and can make myself do even the things i hate the most and sit through the most hideous unpredictable overwhelming loudest event and pretend im enjoying it, even, when actually my brain is fighting the fight of its life. plus, I'll never be able to get a proper diagnosis anyway 🤷🏻♀️ but you must, by all means. drop that imposter's syndrome and talk to your therapist about it. or if you feel like you need to gather more data before you make up your mind, then seek out activists and autistic public personalities online. or share your misgivings with someone you trust and who knows you well, and ask for a second opinion. oh and PLEASE for the love of god ....... stay tf away from harmful ableistic media like the big bang theory. i have a guy muted on ig (a friend of my husband's) who labeled himself "asperger" in his bio specifically because of big bang theory lmao as if that's not the most ignorant ableistic snowflake kind of term to be using for a white cishet guy who just feels "gifted" and "misunderstood".
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hi! i saw that your request are open, so im guessing the matchups are too? if not im so sorry 🙏🏼 you can put this off if it isn't!
could i get a matchup for genshin impact?
my pronouns are she/her and im bisexual leaning to male. im a scorpio and my mbti is INFP/INTP. im around 150-160cm, i have straight and wavy black shoulder length layered hair with bangs and black eyes with transparent glasses. im very introverted and awkward until i get to know a person, then i'll show them a side where im more comfortable and clingy. i face an overwhelming amount of emotions at times so i ghost people super often. im very studious, i take pride in my academics and it's one of the only thing i actually care about. i like anything vintage, like grandpa sweaters, etc. i journal alot, writing down my thoughts & interests. i like to read as well as listening to music and i love cats, especially my 4 cats! i dislike random people touching my things, alot of food (im super picky) and loud noises. thank you so much! have a great day
Hello Anon! Yep, all requests are open, including matchups. I actually gave you two characters because I couldn't decide which would be the better match for you. Hope you like your matchup.
In Genshin Impact, I match you with...
You and Chongyun have a lot in common. You're both introverted and awkward around people you don't know. But once you get to know people, you both get more comfortable.
I feel like Chongyun would enjoy sitting with you while you study. As long as it doesn't distract you, he'd revise his exorcism practices and do his own study.
He'd love your cats. I see Chongyun as someone who likes animals in general. Hopefully your cats like him as well.
Relaxing days spent reading and listening to music together.
Chongyun has a preference towards relaxing music but being friends with Xinyan has given him some appreciation of many other types of music. He's pretty happy to listen to whatever you put on.
You can help each other with your emotions. Chongyun has had years of practice so he may be able to give you some tips but he still struggles himself.
He'd greatly appreciate it if you would help him when his emotions get out of hand. You can join the Victims of Xingqui Club.
A relationship with Chongyun is one built on mutual trust and self-improvement. He values your relationship greatly.
I also match you with...
Tighnari is someone who can appreciate your studious nature.
Like Chongyun, he would enjoy sitting with you while you study. Whether he's doing his own study, or just taking a break and enjoying your company depends on the day.
Not too sure about your cats. I see him as slightly more of a dog person but not much of a pet lover in general. Animals are part of his research. He prefers to keep work and life separate.
Definitely a fan of your vintage aesthetic. Modern au Tighnari definitely wears sweaters so if you two would probably swap clothes a lot (assuming you're comfortable with that).
Enjoys listening to music with you. Just don't have it too loud. He's almost always thinking about something or working on a project and his ears are sensitive!
Tighnari doesn't mind your quiet side. He's surrounded by overly extroverted people like Cyno, and enthusiastic people like Collei.
He finds your company peaceful and relaxing.
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touch of the devil - k.hongjoong 18+
↣ pairing: hongjoong x fem!reader | ao3 version (mxm seongjoong)
↣ genre: angst, fluff if you SQUINT, nsfw, fantasy, supernatural, demon!hongjoong, emo rocker!hongjoong, there do be plot tho.
↣ wc: 9.0k
↣ summary: you came to make a deal with a devil sure, but this is the last thing you were expecting out of a night in a dingy bar.
↣ warnings: explicit smut, mention of death, demons, it’s actually really heavy on plot and angst and less focused on the smut
↣ a/n: again i know it’s my birthday but this is my present to you guys, i am a person who prefers to give rather than receive on my birthday and this was the first thing i wanted to work on during my hiatus!! i’ve got so much inspo and motivation rn that it’s crazy and i can’t wait to have everything all set out for you guys when im back :3
﹊ ﹊ ﹊
Everything about the air around you is heady and thick in a way that chokes you as you step through the fogged bar. This isn’t your sort of scene – not one you would typically find yourself frequenting on a Friday evening without even so much as the company of a friend – and yet here you stand with hands pressed into the pockets of your black leather jacket. There remains a dull thrum in the atmosphere of the club, a steady rhythm of bass and vibrations that makes your ears ring but you do your best to ignore it in favor of reaching the bartender.
“Just a rum and coke please,” you murmur, hand sneaking out of your pocket to lay a few bills flat against the wood counter. You tug your ID card out as well and flash it in the man’s direction when he raises an eyebrow at you, but upon seeing it, he relents and steps away from you to get the drink.
The question remains of why exactly you are in such a dismal and hopeless scene full of people too drunk off their rockers to even fumble around the bar with some sense of dignity. You, who is neither dismal or hopeless yourself nor are you drunk in the slightest (at least not yet).
The answer is simple. This is a breeding ground, a festering cesspool of desires and greed, and it is the prime place to find what you are looking for in terms of deals with the devil. Maybe not one specific devil, but certainly whatever demon you can get your hands on tonight. And you have quite the lot to choose from it seems, because as you glance around the neon-lit building, you can spot many pairs of red eyes glinting under the lights. You know you have no right to be picky — any and all of them will get the job done — but you can’t help but to note that none of them are as appealing as you imagined they would be. When your friend said that these demons thrived off of lust and appeal, you figured that meant they would purposefully up the ante in terms of physical appearances.
The disdain must show on your features as the bartender begins to speak again as he sets your drink down before you on the counter.
“None of them are for you,” he utters, and you twist back to look him in the eye.
“What do you mean?” You inquire, chin tilting to the side in question, and the man huffs out a small laugh.
“They have their prey already. Picked ‘em the second they walked through the door. All it takes is one look to figure out what these needy people crave from them, what appearances they need to take, what voices to use, what outfits to wear. For people like you, though, something more is required before the real games begin.” He points a single bony finger at your face, staring you down over the length of his digit like it’s the barrel of a gun, and that has you shifting in your seat a bit.
“Something… more?”
“One must have a particular level of certainty before coming to make a deal with a demon, ma’am. But you — you don’t seem to truly know what it is you want. And for that reason, the King will see you with no ruses or deception.”
On the contrary, I wouldn’t have dared set foot in here if I didn’t know what it is I wanted, you want to say. However, your attention is held rapt by his final sentence, the one that held unspoken promise to it.
“And by that you mean physical alterations?”
“You catch on quickly, Miss.” The man leans forward, tongue darting out to swipe over his lower lip, and you glance over the motion only once before pushing away from the counter. He notes the slight annoyance in your features a moment later. “The King will like you quite a bit.”
“When can I expect for this ‘King’ to present himself?” You prop an elbow up on the counter and give one last forlorn glance around the bar in the hopes that someone will come over your way, but it’s to no avail.
“Patience, human. The show hasn’t even begun yet.” He motions towards the middle of the bar, the starkly empty space with a glossy stage set in the center with only a microphone held delicately in its stand and nothing else. You had been hoping to make this a speedy trip — a quick in and out with your deal made and nothing else — but it seems you won’t be having that luxury. And it is a bit frustrating, honestly, to come to this place with the expectation of having a demon cater to you and your wants only to be told that you aren’t certain enough for these supernatural beings, so you’ll have to wait on a demon who won’t cater to you or come to you immediately.
You take a quick swig of your alcohol with the desperate hope that perhaps drinking will make you more certain of what you want, although you already know it won’t. The bartender offers a shrug in response to your annoyance then pulls away to tend to other customers, and you take it as an invitation to swivel in your stool and face the stage. It’s still fucking empty, but at least it gives you a better view than the old wood of the counter that now sits under your elbows.
“Leave it to men to make me wait on them, demon or not,” you mutter under your breath, breath fogging the side of your glass a bit.
You nearly choke on the liquid inside in your next breath because the swirling red neon lights come to a halt on the center of the stage, and the suddenness of the shifting lights startles you so much that you have to sit up straight and inhale deeply to keep from coughing on the alcohol in your mouth. The hazed mist hovering above the floor of the bar seems to swirl towards the stage under the beams of light. You watch the movements as though in a trance, slowly leaning forward until your elbows come to rest on your knees. Out of everyone in the bar, you seem to be the only one interested in what’s going on at the center of the room. Mind you, everyone else is preoccupied: demons with their humans, and humans with the mask-wearing demons who cater to their desires. And while you have no reason to be so intrigued by the scene before you, you truly cannot bring yourself to look away, especially as the dull thrum of music in the bar heightens and gains momentum.
There is no way of describing the sounds rumbling around you. Perhaps if you were fully in your senses, you would be able to distinguish the instruments and beats of the song, but the bass clogs your mind and leaves you squinting at the hazy stage. It could be poetic, the way a lone figure pushes his way through the crowds of the bar like he holds all the power in the universe, studded black leather jacket slung around his shoulders. And as the red lights come over him, you can see his features better. Dusty brown hair that shines a bit, one side exposed and cut shorter than the other, which has bangs that hang loose over the side of his face. Metal bars line both ears, another near the end of his left brow, and a final more intricate one that loops around the middle of his lip and connects to two long metal chains. You follow the path of those chains with your eyes, watching them trail downwards until they loop around his chest and disappear behind his jacket. It’s just a black turtleneck that he wears underneath the dramatic leather regalia and chains but somehow he makes the garment look expensive. You dare glance a bit lower, just enough to make out the frayed and distressed jeans that cling to his skin like a vice, leaving hints of enticing skin underneath to peek through. You can’t see his feet thanks to the fog, but you can practically hear his footsteps drumming in your ears with the rise and fall of his shoes.
Simply put, you are entranced by the sight of this man — if he can even be called that, because you wouldn’t find yourself at all surprised should he reveal himself to be a demon on the tail end of this encounter. He barely looks up from the floor on his trek to the stage, only stopping when he comes before the mic stand and exhales against it in a way that sends shivers down your spine. It’s hardly reasonable for any creature to hold your attention in the palm of his hand the way this one does, but there is no chance of you looking away now, especially as his voice begins to drawl through the microphone and coat your ears like honey. There are words, you recognize enough in the music to know that it should be a song you’re familiar with, but none of them truly process in your daze.
It’s all you can do to just sit there and watch his performance. Between the gentle sways of his shoulders and hips, the teasing drag of his tongue over his lower lip whenever there is a break in his lyrics, and the overall intoxicating nature his aura exudes, you are hooked on every breath he takes. You don’t realize how relaxed your body has become under his spell until it’s too late, and that happens to be the last note of the song as well. It is accentuated with the drop of the glass in your hand and a sharp shatter of the cup against the floor. And just as you inhale a startled gasp and break out of your reverie, his deep crimson eyes flicker over to find yours across the bar. Those twisting lips churn something ugly in your gut. You can’t find the strength in your body to move.
“Mine.”
Your heart leaps in your chest as the word leaves his lips, and while you can’t hear it grate against your ears, you can clearly read his lips enough to know what he’s saying.
His eyes glint a bit in the darkness. It shouldn’t leave you wanting more, but that bitter taste of curiosity is nipping at the back of your throat, and you are far too intrigued to turn back now. You just want more. If he seems to understand that at all from the gleam in your eyes, he makes good on it, stepping off the stage and letting his hand drag over the mic in a way that is almost tantalizing. Step after step, he comes closer to you with his lips still curled into a smirk, and the way the lights hit him makes him seem to glisten and glow in the darkness. You don’t realize you’ve been holding your breath until he breaches your personal space and you release a shaky exhale that seems to fog in the air between you. He stretches a hand out to close the space between your bodies and curls his index finger under your chin. The touch is simultaneously hot and cold — your whole body seems to light on fire under it, yet at the same time, the chill in your bones deepens to an alarming degree.
“What is it you desire above all other things?” You can hear him now, loud and clear, and whilst you heard his singing beforehand, the simple rasp and lilt to his regular tone is something that has you unashamedly weak in the knees. “I can give you everything,” he whispers as he presses closer to you. Your knees brush against his form but he keeps on pushing forward until he’s slotted himself between them. The chain hanging from his lips rattles like a chime, singing its unknown song like church bells in the night, although you are far from God and heaven now. “All you need to do is ask.”
You cling to some semblance of reason while you can, knowing full well that it will all leave you soon enough, but for now, it lets you choke out a single statement that has the demon before you laughing under his breath.
“That’s not how it works.”
“And who are you to tell me how it works?” His finger curls a bit harder at your chin, and you can feel the blunt of his nail scraping over your skin. Your eyes are glued to his, so enamored and consumed that you can’t even think to look anywhere else.
In that moment, it is as though the universe is nothing but a speck of dust in the corner of your vision. Something so raw and whole like the man standing before you is all-powerful and vigilant in a way that has every nerve in your body at full attention, ready for whatever his next step might be. And that turns out to be quite the curveball as it seems because he leans closer to you, breath intermingling with yours, and you subconsciously curve your back into his touch to reach him closer. Still, even though you physically show how ready and desperate for the touch you are, he waits and glances over your features.
“What is it you desire from me, human?”
You have to vehemently restrain yourself from simply saying ‘you’ and getting on with it.
“Your name.”
“Is that all you would have from me?” As a demon, it is his life’s work to know the inner-workings of the festering desires of humans. You have no doubt in your mind that he knows exactly what is it you want, even if you are not sure of it yourself, and you do not doubt that he won’t use that to his advantage either. But that’s what you asked for in coming here, and that is exactly what you both expected and wanted out of this.
Perhaps it is shameful, but just for once, you wanted to surrender control. Too often are you asked to have everything set out and planned and under control, and too often do you find yourself wanting someone to just tell you what it is you should do. That could be why the bartender labeled you as ‘uncertain’ because even in this moment of vulnerability, there is still the thinnest thread of thought tethering you to that control. And as of now, you want nothing more than for this demon before you to break that thread.
“I would have your name before I asked for anything else from you. Calling you demon over and over would certainly wear out its welcome, no?”
“That all depends on the context, my dear. But… you can call me Hongjoong, if that’s suitable to your tongue.”
“Hongjoong,” you try, testing the way the name rolls off your tongue in such a delicate manner that the demon before you flutters his lashes a bit.
“Sounds so pretty coming from lips so innocent.” He tilts his head to the side, and the movement flashes the pretty expanse of skin below his jaw. You aren’t shy in the way you let your gaze slip over it before trailing back up to meet his eyes again. “Would you close your eyes for me, doll?” He doesn’t have to ask. He could just make you do so with no resistance but still, he asks as though you could say no if you wanted to. You don’t though, and as such, your eyelids fall shut and your vision turns to black for the time being. “Do you know who I am?”
“Th-The bartender called you the King.”
“And do you understand what that means? Truly understand with every fiber of your being?” The question is heavy on your bones, and it is one that you feel like you should know the answer to yet you can’t find any response to his inquiry. Perhaps he means to confuse you because you hear the soft huff of a laugh fall from his lips. “King of the Underworld, Lord of the Dead. Some would call me Pluto, others Hades, it varies from religion to religion and in every culture. Sometimes I pick up rather banal and common names, other times I find myself seeking something extravagant and luxurious. Now… Hongjoong will be a good middle-ground for us.”
You should be falling to the floor in absolute shock due to his words, but the steady finger under your chin keeps you steady. That and the growing fear in your gut as you come to realize that this man holds so much power in just his pinky finger and could absolutely crush you under his heel whenever he wishes. What are you to a god besides an insignificant fleck of dust on the pavement?
“And what of your appearance? Is that… manifested as well?” You dare to ask.
“I have many faces, yes, but this one is one I wear boldly and frequently. You could say it is my natural form. After so many millennia of fantastical myths and legends, however, I’m sure that would seem odd to you.”
“Are you truly a demon then?”
“King of demons, yes. Whether I am truly a demon myself is something that could be ambiguous, I suppose, but if they are all part of my creations, then would that not make me one myself? Though you could say they are all fragments of my own being, making them all mythical gods. It’s all a matter of perspective; however, I doubt that you came searching this place for a lesson on perspectives.”
“No, I came for…” You trail off, and that blossoming uncertainty from before presents itself again.
“There are two things your heart wants right now. One, I can give you with ease and grace, only if you would allow it. That desire is a fleeting one, however, and I do not think it is what you are truly after in being here. The second… that is a wish I cannot deliver, and I think you are more than aware of that. The reason everyone left you to me is because of what you want. It is a domain only I could ever touch.”
You blink your eyes open in haste, searching his deep crimson gaze for some sort of confirmation of the words. The demon dares to look forlorn and lets his stare drop to the floor rather than looking you directly in the eye. Confusion blossoms in your gut. Yes, you figured there was a slim chance that your wish could not be granted, but still you clung to the desperate hope that maybe there was just a small window of opportunity for such a wish to be granted.
“Death is irreversible,” the demon, Hongjoong as he wishes to be called, says in a quiet tone. “I cannot give that which you want more than anything else.”
“Then what can you give?” You ask, squeezing your eyes shut as tight as possible to keep your emotions from slipping out the corners.
“One of two things: I can give you time to speak with him once more or I can make you forget the pain.”
“And if I choose the latter?”
“It would make you forget everything about him and leave you with no memory of him at all.” Hongjoong exhales a small sigh, the bouncing rhythms of the bass rumbling against your ears along with the sounds of his breaths. “You need not decide right this instant. The payment will be the same either way, so we can settle that first if you’d like.”
“W-Wait,” you stammer. You dare to open your eyes once more. “How would I be able to speak to him if you can’t bring him back?”
“I cannot bring him back the way you want. He… he is gone, and though I am the King of the Dead, there are powers even I do not have. Bringing him back to life is impossible, but I can create a doorway for the two of you to speak through for a short period of time. I have no control over how long it would be, just a forewarning. That is all up to him and his willingness to see you.”
“I can’t imagine he wouldn’t want to see me,” you murmur, but the pang in your chest tells you otherwise.
“Sometimes, death and the underworld change fundamental parts of people. They are no longer alive, after all, and as such, those human vices and personality traits dissipate. How you knew him in life could be vastly different than the spirit who now resides in my domain. It is all a matter of weighing risks, my dear. What matters most to you? Remembering him or him remembering you?”
“So if I ask to see him, I would remember him but there’s a chance that he would have no recollection of me? And should I ask to forget, there will be no way of knowing whether he remembers me in the afterlife or not?”
“Precisely.”
That is a hefty bargain to weigh. It is almost too much for your shoulders just to think about it. One is starkly more selfish than the other, but if he’s dead, what good will selflessness do you? It won’t bring him back, that’s for sure. Either you are left with the painful realization that he does not have any memory of you in the afterlife, or you forget it all to avoid that pain. Maybe thinking about the payment before deciding would be a good idea after all.
“As for the payment? How many years do I owe you?” Demons have no use for human currency or trinkets that could be traded for favors. You can barter the only thing you have — years of life. Whether it shortens your lifespan or turns you into a personal slave for a certain amount of time, that is a price you must be willing to pay for such services. You are more than prepared to barter it all off right now if need be.
“None,” Hongjoong answers coolly, and you quirk a brow upwards at the nonchalance in his tone. “I do not deal in years of life. Not often, at least. My abilities are bound in… passion. Lovemaking, fornication, sex, fucking – whatever you wish to call it. Of course, it wouldn’t have to be that exactly, should you not desire that. The other option is a blood pact, a ritual that would take hours to complete, although both could take quite some time depending on your stamina.” There’s a breath of silence that allows Hongjoong’s lips to twist into a suggestive grin, and heat brushes the base of your neck as you fight off waves of embarrassment. “I cannot guarantee that the blood pact would be painless. With sex, I could at least provide some comfort that the pain would only be temporary; however, the choice is yours. Both are binding and would mean that you could never make a deal with another demon again, and you would be marked as mine for eternity.”
“What does being yours entail?”
“Nothing diabolical or unsavory, I promise. Just… when the time comes for you to pass on and join the Underworld, you would take a place at my side.”
“How many people have you laid claim to? Did they all agree to the same terms? How can I trust your word?” The questions tumble from your lips without relent.
“For what you desire, the cost is far less than what I would usually ask for. Those lucky enough to deal with me in the past paid less for their debts. The blood pact… the fornication… both are binding elements. The real cost is your service. Most have agreed to give me their servitude in the afterlife, all with their own places in my domain. That is what you would be offering as well. You will live just as long as you would without making this deal but make up for it after your death.”
“And that’s it?”
Hongjoong’s eyes twinkle a bit under the lights above your heads.
“What did you expect from me, doll? Savagery? Unfairness? Everyone deserves a fair price for what they want, regardless of station in life or status in society.”
“Deal,” you utter without any more hesitation, blinking up into Hongjoong’s dark orbs. There lies a lingering sense of regret in your gut, one that you cannot chase away no matter how hard you try, but you do not need to dwell on it any longer.
“And how would you like to bind our deal, my dear? Neither can be handled immediately. The blood pact requires special preparations for the ritual, but the other — I would not have you in such a place as dirty as this.”
“I-I, um, sex will work just fine,” you bite out, the skin of your cheek caught between your teeth.
“Then when the time comes that you are ready with your decision on what it is you truly want, all you need to do is take this—” Hongjoong retracts his hand from where it rests gently against the column of your throat and digs into one of his pockets. He pulls out a gilded card, one that is black and gold with flecks of red across the surface, but there are no other adornments to the material. “Tear it in half and it will bring you to our meeting place, and I will join you there to seal the deal. Should you decide that you do not want this after all, then all you need to do is burn the card. The decision lies in your hands, and yours alone.” He has to lift one of your limp hands and forcefully place the card into your waiting palm, closing his fingers around yours to make you cling to the item.
“I – th-thank you,” you stammer as you blink from your closed hand to Hongjoong’s features.
“The pleasure is all mine, doll.”
Those are the last words you hear from the demon before he slips away from you, the dense fog lingering in the air swirling up around his body, and within moments, his shadowy form disappears entirely from sight. The air grows cold around you once more. You are left with only the fleeting desire for that warmth to return, for you to feel less alone than you are in that moment, and even if it’s the briefest visit ever you just want one last chance to tell your lost lover how you feel without mistakes this time.
///
The night, as per usual, is cold and unforgiving. It allows for too many opportunities to be alone with lost feelings and thoughts. It has been weeks (if not months) since you visited that dingy club and your fateful meeting with none other than the King of the Dead. Yet you are still here, wallowing in the memories that you’ve been left to suffer with alone, and the gilded black card sits in your nightstand untouched. You open the drawer just to stare at it from time to time, when the nights are particularly rough, and it already had begun collecting a thin layer of dust the last few times you looked at it.
It isn’t that you haven’t made your decision about what you want from your deal with Hongjoong. The more terrifying fact is that you are fully aware of what it is you want, and you simply cannot rectify the guilt that comes along with the pure selfishness of your decision. The feeling is so potent that it swarms your every thought. You know it wouldn’t be an issue once you meet with Hongjoong; the demon will take it all away and leave you with nothing. You won’t even know enough to be guilty any longer, but the pain of committing to the decision is strong enough to make you sick to your stomach.
Wooyoung — the one who suggested you go to the club and make the deal in the first place — will not shut up about how worried he is about you. You won’t recall the deal or why you made it, so what’s holding you back? A temporary guilt that won’t exist longer than a few seconds once you’re actually in Hongjoong’s presence? As he said, you just need to swallow the feeling and get on with it. Prolonging the regrets any longer won’t do you any good.
You huff out a quiet laugh in the silence of your darkened room. The black gilded card taunts you again now, gleaming up at you through the shadows with its faint hints of gold and red. Maybe Wooyoung is right and the only way to get rid of missed opportunities is to forget about them entirely. Yeosang was but a chapter in your life, one that is past and gone now, and as Hongjoong said, there is no reversing death. Seeing him one last time won’t give you anything but pain.
You stretch a shaky hand towards the card in the drawer. It’s cold to the touch, dust billowing up with even the slightest touch of your fingers. You have to dig your nail under the material to pull it up, and once it’s safely set in your palm, you drag your thumb over the surface to brush the dirt away. No words on the surface, no sign that it has been touched by a demon, and not even a hint as to what it could possibly be for.
It is surprisingly flexible, at least moreso than you would have imagined, and you give it a few testing bends to see how easy it would be to break. Hongjoong simply gave you the instruction to tear it in half and that was all. You don’t expect him to suddenly materialize before you on a whim, but surely such a creation is bound by some sort of magic on his part. It is hard enough to believe that demons are real living creatures, but magic as well? Maybe you’ve passed on and just don’t realize it yet. Still, you exhale one last huff of air into the darkness before letting your eyes flutter shut. Taking the card between your hands, you begin to slowly rip the material until it separates with the force, torn in two mismatched pieces.
Nothing fantastical happens.
That fact alone is so overwhelmingly disappointing that you really think for a moment that Hongjoong was just some goth rocker in a stoner bar who pulled an elaborate trick on you. It can’t be too difficult to get your hands on some weird red-toned contacts and weave some elaborate story about being the King of Hell. You could do that yourself. Why did you think he was incapable of such a charade?
Because he knew what you wanted without you having to say it.
Yes, well, Wooyoung claimed that your regrets and grief were evident in your features every time he looked at you. Maybe Hongjoong could see it as well.
You fall back onto your bed, flattening your back against the mattress with a small shout of frustration. The urge to cry is strong; if you’ve spent all these weeks uselessly worrying over something that could all be a farce, you don’t even know how you would react. You squeeze your eyes shut tight, blinking away the tears that blossom in the corners there as best you can. The rolling emotions in your system distract you from the sudden shift in temperature, and before you know it heat washes over you and fills the void of cold in your body. You jerk but refuse to sit up quite yet, eyes flying open in your shock only to choke on air as a bright golden light fills your vision and swarms you with warmth. The cushion under your body doesn’t feel the same either; it is not your bed, it’s too plush and soft, too warm under you, and you feel like you are absolutely drowning in the sensation.
Gold flickers above you, twinkling lights that glisten like small stars above you, and the ceiling is so dark that you nearly think it’s just an opening to the night sky. You sit up in a mad panic. The gold and red decorations littering the far too lavish room barely process in your vision as you look for a way out, and you don’t even see the figure coming up along your side until he’s upon you. A hand stretches out to brush over your forehead. You nearly shriek in your state of terror, but the sound is all but stolen from your lungs instead.
“It’s only me, doll. You’re safe.”
Hongjoong. Ah, Hongjoong. Then… he was telling the truth. It wasn’t a farce or a deception meant to be a game. He claimed to be the Devil Incarnate, and here he stands before you in a room too rich and exquisite for words. You can’t find it in you to think he’s lying now.
You dare to glance up and meet his gaze, finding it so soft on your face that you have the audacity to blush under his stare despite the things you’ll be doing with him soon enough.
“Have you made your decision then?” He asks, tone soft and light. It isn’t one that demands an immediate answer. You know he could ask what took you so long to decide, complain about your hesitance, say that you kept him waiting for far too long — instead, he exudes patience with you, hand slowly combing over your forehead down to your cheek and brushing over the skin there with a touch so featherlight that you almost don’t realize it’s there at all.
“I-I have,” you whisper like the two of you aren’t the only ones in the room and it’s a secret meant only for your ears.
“What would you have from me first then? As I told you before, the payment is the same regardless of your decision, and as such, we can bind the deal first if you’d rather.”
You swallow around nothing. There is no harm in going through with the decision now, but your nerves are so frazzled and out of sorts that you almost desire the sex simply as a means of stress relief. Hongjoong steps in front of you, fully coming into view, and you are shocked at how… mundane he looks. You blink fervently at the man — demon, rather — and take in the gentle part of his hair, the soft glow of his skin that makes him look simply ethereal under this light. He hardly looks like a demon to you; his features are too smooth and perfect for that, from the curves of his lips to the even line of his nose. Although you suppose that’s all he wants you to see, yet it still seems oddly intimate to a certain degree.
“You aren’t worried that I’ll try to run away after my wish is fulfilled?” You ask. Hongjoong arches his brows at you, and his neutral expression slips into one of momentary shock.
“Where are you going to go, my dear? I brought you to this place, and you will need me to send you back once we’re done here.”
It sinks in at that moment how you are completely at his mercy right now. Not that you had any plans of running away, but the question was moreso just to test the waters, see if he is truly as merciful as his features make him out to be. The underlying danger in his tone proves your point and sends a chill down your spine.
“Is that something I ought to be worried about, doll? Should I claim you now to make sure you keep your end of the bargain?” The question sits on your ear like warm honey. It chokes you, fills your senses with Hongjoong’s scent, and you almost find yourself leaning into his curling lips before catching yourself. That seems to pique his interest in the very least, and his smile twists a bit more. “The decision is in your hands as always. I won’t do anything you don’t give me explicit permission to do.”
“Permission granted,” you mutter before catching a hand on Hongjoong’s collar. “Do it all.” You aren’t too worried about damaging his clothes as he’s not wearing anything drastically fancy or expensive-looking, and thus you twist your fist into a ball around the fabric of his black tee and yank him down to your height. He bends at the waist, hands catching on the mattress before his forehead can smack hard against yours. There’s a bit of tension in his neck, and that keeps him far enough back so that he doesn’t kiss you quite yet. It’s almost as though he is waiting for something else, eyes carefully tracing your features with great care before he settles on your lips, and a sharp inhale of breath follows before that thin line in his composure snaps.
His lips hit yours with a surprising amount of force, and the kiss isn’t at all what you were expecting — well, to be more accurate, you aren’t quite sure what you were expecting in the first place. It’s much more pleasant than you could have imagined though, and Hongjoong isn’t shy with the touch at all. His tongue is quick to swipe over your lower lip, hands darting upwards to brush over your sides before reaching your face, and he brings a knee down on the mattress to support his weight as he leans over you. You follow the motion when he pushes forward and lean back until you have no choice but to scoot back on the bed. Hongjoong moves with you with the same amount of fervor, still pressed to your lips without relent, and you don’t even think to stop as he completely drapes himself over your body, knees still up and supporting his weight. The cushion of the mattress dips by your head, a telltale sign that he’s placed his hands there, and you use that as your opportunity to stop for air. Hongjoong surely has no need to breathe like you do since he is undead, but he still pants above you, chest heaving as a pretty flush rises to his cheeks.
“Putting that much power in a demon’s hands is dangerous, is it not?” He mutters. You let your lashes flutter shut as he moves back to your lips, hot breath ghosting over your skin. “Are you sure you want to do that?”
“I’ll tell you if it’s something I don’t like,” you murmur, opening an eye to peek at him. He meets your gaze with a soft laugh, but your answer seems to please him enough to bring his attention back to your lips. You inhale as his tongue breaches your mouth and pushes into the wet cavern inside. There’s no chance for you to fight back for any sort of dominance because he only thrusts deeper and coats the inside of your mouth with his taste until you can feel his tongue brushing over your palate. A quiet moan reverberates through your throat and against his lips. You feel the barest hint of a smile in the kiss, then his lips are suddenly gone from yours. You gasp for air with the freedom. Heat pools in the depths of your gut, a pleasant one that leaves you wanting more, and you aren’t sure if it’s simply been so long since you last had sex or if Hongjoong truly has that effect on you.
He returns to touching your body a moment later, hands trailing to the row of buttons on your nightshirt, and one by one, he pulls them apart until the material is barely clinging to your skin. His lips replace his fingers then. First at your jaw placing a wet trail of kisses and soft nips that leave you with goosebumps. Then he reaches the midpoint of your sternum and rests the flat of his tongue there, tasting and teasing your skin until you can do nothing but writhe under him because he is taking so damn long. Your impatience is laughable to him, as evidenced by the quiet huff of air that leaves him next.
“I want to taste every inch of you,” he mumbles against the skin of your stomach, hands pulling your nightshirt away to expose more of the skin underneath. He makes good on his words, and that damn tongue traces lower and lower until he reaches the band of your pants and underwear. You instinctively dart a hand down to tangle in his hair. “F-Fuck.” The curse slips out when you give an accidental tug to the hair close to his nape, and you nearly think that you’ve hurt him in some manner until you catch sight of the blissed-out expression on his features.
“D-Do you — can I…?”
“Do it harder while I eat you out,” he growls. His fingers close hard around the remainders of your close, and you don’t even have time to nod before he’s yanking both your pants and underwear down in one fell swoop. It leaves you more than a little exposed — you’re suddenly nearly nude before the demon who is still fully clothed, and that realization draws your thighs tight together in a sudden rush of embarrassment. You swallow hard around nothing, eyes darting away from Hongjoong’s prying gaze.
All of a sudden, he shrugs your hand off his hair and sits back on his heels. You don’t understand what his reasoning is until you settle your eyes back on his body. He’s leaned back to start stripping layers of clothes off in a rush, hands fumbling and struggling to pull them away in an orderly manner. There is no composure to his actions, only a hastened fervor that has him tossing his shoes far from the bed along with random articles of clothes until he’s laid fully bare before you. You really try your hardest not to glance down at his… you know, but the urge is overwhelming. Before you can even catch a glimpse, however, Hongjoong is on you again, hands latched around your thighs and pulling you to the edge of the bed as he kneels before you on the floor. The sudden movement has you squealing in surprise, and that noise is broken off into a startled moan when Hongjoong’s lips brush through your folds without warning.
“O-Oh god,” you gasp out. Hongjoong’s tongue gives a long and dragging pull through your heat, teasing some of the juices out of you with little restraint.
“Far from it actually,” he replies against your clit. A cheeky grin eats away at his features, but it quickly disappears as he returns his focus to your cunt. Your hand finds its way back down to his hair once more and tugs hard at the strands. Each tweak of his tongue through your folds has your legs jerking a bit, and he has to tighten his grip on your thighs to keep you from moving so much under his touch.
“I’m not — I w-won’t last, pl-please, I–” You can’t even finish the sentence as Hongjoong flicks the tip of his tongue right over your clit and cuts you off. He repeats that same motion, again and again, brings you right to the precipice of an orgasm only to tear you back down from it with soft kisses pressed to the outside of your folds. You can’t keep track of how many times he repeats that process, but it is more than enough to have you shaking from exhaustion and desperation even though you haven’t even been able to come yet.
“Are you going to beg for it, doll?” Hongjoong hums after what feels like hours of pleasurable torture. “I promised to make you feel good, did I not? You just have to tell me what you want.” His words are so taunting that it burns you with embarrassment. The need for that orgasm hangs on every nerve ending of your body, and you could cry just out of the need to come.
“Please,” you whisper in a tone broken from constant moans and cries.
“Be more specific.” It’s so cruel. He dangles the promise of pleasure before your eyes again, this time nipping ever so gently at your bud, and you really do cry this time, fingers digging harshly on his scalp. That draws a prolonged growl from his lips, and it reverberates against you so nicely that you could come from that. Hongjoong pulls his head back too soon though and the sensation is dashed away.
“N-No, no, please. P-Please, Hongjoong, I — please let me come. I need it, I need it so badly. Shit, just – just please let me come,” you wail as tears slip out the corners of your eyes and spill onto the sheets under you. That’s the breaking point for him as well, or so it would seem, because the next time his mouth brushes through your cunt, he doesn’t relent. You come undone on his tongue, riding out the waves of your intense orgasm as he fucks his wet muscle into your heat. He won’t stop chuckling either — a low noise that just prolongs the pleasure and makes you quiver from overstimulation. He doesn’t let up until a dry and choked sob pushes past your lips.
Suddenly he is back up on the bed, bent over your body to be eye to eye with you. His fingers trace over your wet cheeks then clasp hard around your jaw.
“Too much?”
“N-No,” you stammer through the wet cries. “So good. So so good.”
“Mm, can you take my cock too, doll?” He all but purrs the words against your skin. His soft and trailing kisses return to your skin, peppering the line of your jaw just past his fingers.
“Yes, please, I c-can. Please. I want i-it all.” You never thought you could sound so overwhelmingly desperate, but the tumbling sensation that swerves through your stomach as Hongjoong’s demeanor shifts has you falling into absolute shambles. He shifts your position, pushing you up higher to rest against the pillows, and you start to drape your legs around his waist. That must not be the position he had in mind though, because his hand clamps down hard on one of your calves and pushes it to the top of his shoulder. Before you can even blink, he does the same with your other leg, effectively folding you in half and into a position you weren’t even aware that your body was capable of. That shock is momentary as you feel the tip of what must his cock rubbing over your pulsating hole. You can’t do anything but ball your fists around the sheets under you and cling to them like a vice. It’s the only thing that can prepare you for his girth; the stretch may not be as much as you thought it would be, but it still stings like a bitch even after he bottoms out in you. That pain must be showing on your features – in the way your brows are tightly knit together and your eyes are screwed shut so that excess tears from earlier slip out.
The soft caress of lips touches your forehead. It’s so gentle and delicate that you nearly miss it in your efforts to grow used to the sensation between your legs, but Hongjoong repeats it time and time again until your breathing steadies and your chest stops heaving as much. It’s only then that he dares to resituate his hips. You crack an eye open to look at him, and it’s abundantly clear that he’s trying his hardest to hold back and keep from fucking into you with reckless abandon.
“I’m okay now,” you whisper, pulling a hand off the bedsheets to brush some loose strands of hair out of Hongjoong’s vision. “Please fuck me as hard as you’d like.” You snake the same hand around the back of his neck. When he still doesn’t move, you offer a sharp tug to the hair that falls over his sweat-slick nape, and that spurs him into action. His hips snap roughly against yours, pushing your back further into the crude curve it’s already in. Now that the dull throbbing pain has dissolved into a sensation of pleasure, you drown yourself in the drag of his member inside you. It’s quite possibly the best feeling you’ve had all night with the way his tip rubs over your bundle of nerves at just the right angle.
Hongjoong drops his elbows to the pillow under your head, and you greet him with a kiss that is mostly just an awkward clash of teeth for the most part. He gains enough composure to shift the angle to one that’s easier for both of you, hips still working hard as he rocks into you with the same force and speed as before. You are so lost in the euphoria that you can’t even feel your next orgasm sneaking up on you, but when it does, it pulls a noiseless scream from your lips. Hongjoong mouths at the corner of your lips as you ride it out. He still seems far off from his own high, even as he slows the pulses of his thrusts. You claw your way back from the high of your orgasm to grip his hair tighter and pull him closer to you.
“In me. I need you to come in me or not at all,” you demand through a huffed out sigh. It’s a moment of throwing caution to the wind, one that is quite worth it thanks to the expression of hunger and lust that fills Hongjoong’s face.
“You can’t just say things like that, doll,” he growls into the shell of your ear. You try to laugh but he interrupts you with a thrust harsher than any of the ones before. Every sound that falls from your lips now is stuttered and broken at the seams, and you let him fuck you with that same level of passion until he finally seems to tire and lose his rhythm. The only warning you have that he’s about to orgasm is the slight whine to his tone when he moans next. You push what strength you have left into clenching hard around his cock, and that is ultimately what tips him over the edge and pulls a delightful moan from his lips as he spills into your tight heat. He releases his hold on your legs, letting them slip away from his shoulders and back into a more comfortable position on the bed, but he refuses to move off your body.
You aren’t sure how long the two of you stay like that: with Hongjoong continually mouthing small kisses to the underside of your jaw and you just staring blankly at the glittering ceiling with a mind nearly empty. However much time passes doesn’t quite matter because once you recover your senses enough to be coherent again, you recall what is supposed to come next. Shaky hands find their way to Hongjoong’s arms and trail up to rest atop his back.
“Take it all away,” you exhale through a pant, hands clinging desperately to the milky skin of Hongjoong’s shoulders. “I don’t want to remember him anymore.” His chest heaves against yours, and a few loose strands of dark hair fall forward to stick to his sweat-slick forehead. This time when he kisses you, it is hot and searing, a brand against your lips, one that burns the inside of your mouth and sets your tongue alight. The sensation slips down the back of your throat, fills your gut, burns you from the inside out, and all your thoughts go hazy under the touch of his lips. With that one kiss, Hongjoong takes it all away. He gives into your desires, heeds your wishes, and grants you the ultimate peace and serenity you so deeply craved. He continues to cling to you like he’s never held something so desperately or lost in his infinite existence. You return the embrace in full while you can, strength already leaving you in the afterglow of your fornication, and you rake your nails down over his back if only to leave him with some sort of trophy to leave with. He is already leaving with your memories though, a trophy to hold close to his heart should there ever be a time when you ask for them to be returned to you. Perhaps in your afterlife, you’ll ask for them back, and Hongjoong would gladly give them should it be what you desire.
That is what he is, after all. As much as he takes, the Demon King of the Underworld gives in return, where he can with what he can. His duty, his bond, the sole purpose for his existence is to maintain that balance between giving and taking. But if it’s for you — a creature so lost, dismal, and hopeless — perhaps he can tip the scales a bit further in your direction.
At least, that’s what he thinks as you curve your body into his and press your lips with more fervor than before. That maybe, just maybe, endless years of his own hopelessness and confusion were all meant to lead him to finding this: a purpose in his undying life.
﹎ ﹎ ﹎
#atzinc#kdiarynet#kwritersworldnet#ateez smut#ateez x reader#ateez angst#ateez imagine#ateez imagines#ateez oneshot#ateez scenarios#hongjoong smut#hongjoong x reader#hongjoong angst#hongjoong imagine#hongjoong imagines#hongjoong oneshot#hongjoong scenarios
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i.changkyun / reader
genre: yandere!changkyun, librarian!reader (sex worker!changkyun)
warning(s)!!!: clubbing, mentions of sex/sex work, obsessive behavior, stalking, ‘love at first sight’ but messed up, masturbation (male), implied violence/murder, manipulation, changkyun plays the nice guy role but isn’t, changkyun is also pretty messed up (oops), y/n is oblivious to an astounding degree, implied drugging, chains/collars, confinement, kidnapping
w.count: 12.3k
Series | One-shot | Two-shot | Drabble [Rated: M]
synopsis: im changkyun is a prime sex worker at a local club. nothing gets his pride swelling more than any poser off the street willing to come into his club and pin bills between the elastic of his fishnets and skin. what he finds more exhilarating than any show, pole climb or heated one-night stand, however; is the one sober woman sitting among her group of wasted friends in a velvet, vip booth. he’ll do anything to know everything about her; putting on a friendly smile was only the first step.
a/n: you can blame DAZED for this mess (hi, just in case you need a reminder, this is purely fiction and not at all who changkyun rly is as a person. nothing about this is okay in irl)
This was nothing new. This was just the way his life always played out. An exhilarating erotic number on a stage with a pole, fishnets and teasing personality followed by the highest bidder to continue his line of work in a more secluded section of the club.
Fantasia Dyed may have been a newer club against its competitors that have been around for years, but the workers and staff inside raised the bar previously set. While clubs can be shady to begin with, what with the use of alcohol at every turn, murmurs of drugs, and agreements to met up for a quick money job- Fantasia Dyed had a reputation of the best line of sex workers you could get your dirty hands on. If you had the money, that was.
Im Changkyun was the front man of that line up. Wanted by men, women and anyone in between- if you had the cash he demanded for his services, he was yours for the night. He had no qualm so long as you paid and used the protection he required to keep your own STIs to your damn self. He really wasn’t picky, and he never stopped to ask himself as to why.
So, this- crawling out of some random woman’s creaky, box spring bed and pulling on the clothes he had lost earlier- was nothing new. He looked over his shoulder as he ran his black painted fingers through his blond hair.
The woman was passed out, a fuzzy, brown blanket covering her body as Changkyun turned away from her. Throwing his shirt back on, flinging his jacket over his shoulders and thrusting his arms through the sleeves, he shimmied on his black skinnies and boots. Grabbing his abandoned black, clutch bag from the stranger's couch he unclasped it to look at the envelope of bills he had received just hours earlier from his ‘client’.
Throwing himself on the couch, he crossed his legs and counted the bills, smirking when he was adamant he was paid in full- with even a small service tip he assumed- to cover over his asking price for the night. Satisfied, he got up and left that small apartment he had stumbled into.
It was only when he entered his own home- the top floor penthouse of some wealthy building- did he wonder just for the briefest of moments if he was truly satisfied.
-x-x-x-
“Y/n, if you don't come with me to Fantasia like you promised you would 2 years ago when it opened now that I finally have the money and the chance for my birthday, you’re being grounded.”
You, who was busy replacing books that you had been wheeling around on your return cart back on the shelf, had the lovely company of your best friend sitting behind you at a library table as you worked. She’d been going on and on about her birthday plans and while you were happy she was excited about them, she was adamant on adding you to the attendee list.
Maybe it was cliche, but the oh-so-thrilling life you lived as a librarian of your local public library painted a rather ‘stay at home’ picture of you; and that is exactly how you wanted it. The whole reason you took this job opportunity was because the head librarian noticed you come in every other Wednesday for a new list of to-reads to rent and offered a position after she got to know you a bit better.
Had you had the choice, you’d stay cooped up in your house with a good book, a nice warm drink, a rainy day and peace and quiet for the rest of your life. But, of course, that was a fantasy. Your social life was barely breathing, with Halie-the insistent best friend behind you- being the center of your social solar system.
You were a prime recluse, you didn’t even keep in touch with your parents as often as you should since they were so utterly upset you were throwing so much ‘potential’ away when you decided to be a librarian instead of going into some out of this world career field.
You had Halie and Halie had connections with just about everyone ever. She was easy to adapt to personalities and was generally kind to anyone she meets unless they’re rude first. She was a prime example of a modern ‘dream girl’ that people had. Though, she was still your friend no matter who she is with anyone else.
Was that naive of you?
“Y/n, I’m telling you, you’ve gotta cooooome,” she whined. Sitting backward in her chair, leaning back and pulling on the back of the chair. You sighed, pushing a spine of a book into its rightful you had just mapped out. “Please,” she begged in a pathetically, high pitched voice.
“If I go, will you stop whining?” You asked with your back still towards her, but you could practically see the smile on her face with the small, over-dramatic gasp she let out. You almost immediately regretted your choice, and wished you could take it back. You knew Halie wouldn’t let it happen though. You’ve spoken and now her selective hearing will kick on and she wouldn’t hear you even if you changed your mind.
“So, you’re going?!” She screeched as you turned around and shushed her. She was in a library. With a few more accepting statements from you solidifying your attendance to her birthday, she left happily as you finished stocking your shelves in dread before sitting behind your check-out counter with the same dread- only 10x stronger.
You watched the time tick by on the computer screen at work, the watch around your wrist on the way home, the hanging clock on your living room wall and the alarm you set on your phone for 9 pm when you were set to get ready. Time passed far too fast for your liking- you couldn’t even squeeze in a nap to help the nerves.
Before you knew it, you were walking out of your home, locking the door behind you with the only acceptable club outfit you could think of as you made your way to Fantasia Dyed, texting Halie that you were dreadfully on the way.
-x-x-x-
“Hey, Kyun! Take ten, dude!” Changkyun, who had just stepped down off of the high perched stage covered in sweat ruffled his blond hair that clung to his forehead in strands. He nodded as he grabbed his bottle of water, slouching in a nearby domed-stool.
One of his ankle high, black platform boots propped up on the stool’s ring with the other on the ground. The white tank top he had personally cut off to end at his rib cage and expose his stomach drenched in spots of sweat. Black skinnies clinging to his toned legs and his fishnets showing loud and proud through the open knees of his jeans and wrapping around the perfection of his waist. Having left his faux fur coat in the employee lounge for the night.
His dark eyes scanned the floor level he was currently occupying the best he could from his seat at the juice bar- for the lameizoids who wanted something non-alcoholic at his club. He glanced at the wristwatch strapped onto the inside of his wrist and checked the time. It was only just past 10 as he smirked.
The night was still young.
From not too far off in a different area than he was, he heard a small commotion starting to murmur. From the looks of what he could see over his sips of water and his bangs hanging in his eyes as he flipped them annoyingly out of his way over and over, it may have been someone’s birthday. Guest after guest going into the same area with the same woman in stockings and a cocktail dress hugging and greeting them.
A VIP birthday reservation; that did ring a small bell somewhere in the overbooked mind of the club worker. Perhaps it would pay off if he did some of his work within their sights. Birthday crowds almost always paid off in terms of after work lip service and bonus pay.
Stepping his foot off the lower ring of the stool he had been comfortably sitting on, he stood as he set his bottle on the juice bar. The tender at the particular unpopular drink selection area took it and tucked it away under the bar where Changkyun always asked him to put it so no one tried to get creative with it.
Walking around the venue area, he strutted by the lower ground VIP booth surrounded by thick, velvet ropes. Whoever this birthday diva was, she sure went all out to keep her and her group uninterrupted. A lower level 10 person booth, a table full of booze and a secure perimeter to keep outsiders rightfully out of her hair. Just from the set up, she must’ve been some spoiled princess.
However, what really caught his gaze was one particular woman. A woman dressed in a tank top, a cheap looking fake leather jacket and dark jeans. Perhaps not ideal for Fantasia’s club etiquette and whatever she was sipping on in her clear glass certainly didn’t seem like any alcoholic beverage to his trained eye. His pierced brow ticked up as he walked fully by and the table of rambunctious party-goers left his sight around the wall.
“Must be a prude,” he murmured but somehow, he almost felt guilty when the words left his mouth. He couldn’t fathom at all why. It stalled him physically as he stopped in his tracks for just a moment before strutting further away from the booth to scope out a good area to work his magic.
The moment midnight hit Changkyun was being flagged over by the absolutely smashed table he had passed earlier that night. The VIP birthday booth had confidently called him over. As he moseyed his way over, with a few of his coworkers already there to entertain the group, he was greeted by some drunken man hanging off his shoulder.
Among the group of drunk or passed out party goers, there was the same woman from earlier who still seemed completely sober. Changkyun raised his eyebrow as he shook the man on his shoulder off as he stumbled around and clung to the next nearest bod. He walked over to your side and sat himself down beside you on the velvet booth.
Crossing his legs, he watched you flinch when he plopped himself down, his elbows rising to rest on the back of the booth, his hand hovering close to your face. He sure made himself comfortable. He had to admit though, as you sipped on yet another refill of something nonalcoholic, you were pretty easy going on the eyes.
“You sure don’t seem like you’re having any fun, lady,” he chided as he lifted one arm off the back of the booth to push his hair back out of his eyes for only the millionth time that evening. He heard you nervously chuckle beside him and something about the sound of it stirred pleasantly in his chest.
“Well, this isn’t exactly my scene,” you told him. Your voice was soft like Christmas bells, but it erupted in his ears, making the background of sounds and voices and bass all drown out. He was solely focused on your lips and the sound they produced when you spoke he couldn’t hear anything else.
“Not your scene, but here you sit in mine,” he teased as he smirked at you. You tapped the side of your glass that had become a slipping hazard from it’s condensation. Changkyun looked at the friends around you who seemed to be having the time of their young lives. “You’re friends seem to be enjoying themselves.”
“Well, they go out a lot. I really don’t like these kinds of places,” you told him before you looked at him with a slightly apologetic smile. “No offense.”
“Club scenes aren’t for everyone, I understand that. If you hate it so much, why did you come here?” He asked as you sighed, dipping your chin. He felt a small spark of panic rise in his throat as he saw you suddenly even more forlorn than you have been. Did he put that look on your face by asking your dumb questions?
He mentally halted himself, once again wondering why it affected him so much what you did and did not like or how you acted.
“It’s my best friend’s birthday so she pretty much begged me to come with her tonight,” you lifted your head and looked over to where she was, downing yet another shot. You’d have to remember to book a cab for her to go home- if she doesn’t go home with the staff member she keeps clinging to. “I probably won’t stay much longer since she pretty much forgot I’m even here,” you pouted.
Changkyun’s eyes swelled at the precious pout to your lips as you whined about being forgotten because you were sober and weren’t partying like an animal. What was wrong with him?
“Do you like coffee?” He suddenly blurted out. He couldn’t stop the words from forcing their way out of his mouth before his brain could functionally filter them or even stop them. He gulped when you turned to look at him in the eyes for the first time that night. Maybe it was the neon lights in the club or maybe it was the dim atmosphere that made them so enticing to gaze into, but he was locked in your gaze- unable to break away from you. His jaw nearly dropped open as he explored the color of them surrounded by the club's aura.
“Coffee?” You asked in clarification. He just clamped his teeth together before nodding once. “Well, I’m not the biggest coffee fan in the world, but I like teas’ and I can handle a frappe if I’m in the mood for it.”
“I get off at three,” he told you as he desperately tried to keep eye contact. “If you find the stomach to hang around another three hours, we can get some?” He pitched as his voice that was normally always confident- as it should be for his line of grade-a work- shook just slightly with the booming club bass.
Your eyes shifted when he put the offer out there, and he started to internally panic. Would you say no? Would you politely decline him and try and carry on like he never said a word? Or would you turn him down and leave? Then, it hit him. You were in a club; a club popular for sex work and Changkyun happened to lead that gaggle of workers. It’s pretty damn obvious you were assuming he had some ulterior motive. For once, he didn’t.
He dropped his elbow from the back of the booth as he turned towards you slightly, scooting forward to the edge of the booth seat.
“I don’t mean to hook up or anything,” he clarified, “I just want to get to you know, so I wanted to get coffee at an ungodly hour.” The hands he waved around to try and help convince you quickly settled onto his jean torn, and fishnet covered lap. “If you want to.”
You sat and considered his offer. It was Saturday, and the library was closed on Sundays so you could technically afford to be out later than you typically would. And a late night chat with someone other than your wasted party of friends did sound tempting. He seemed kind enough, even with his get up and the flashes of a performance you had glimpsed earlier with him on the lifted stage and poles. You should never judge a book by it’s cover, just because he seemed like someone who slept around all the time, didn’t mean he was a bad guy, right?
You smiled at him and his breath left him in one fell swoop. It was like your smile materialized into a pro-boxer and just gut punched him. And he loved it.
“A three am frappe sounds great,” you told him. He smiled back wider than he knew he could. He thanked you before he excused himself to go back to work. However, before he went back to the floor, he practically sprinted into the single employee bathroom and locked himself inside.
He slammed his back against the door as his knees wobbled and he grew weaker. His breath was staggered as his chest heaved in unsteady shudders. His fingertips shook and he had shivers running up his back from the memory of your eyes and that smile. He started chuckling to himself in the empty bathroom as he felt his cheeks flush.
God he felt so euphoric in the moment, it was practically erotic. Whatever was wrong with him, he started questioning if it was really wrong if it made him feel so good.
-x-x-x-
It was ten till three in the morning when Changkyun did one last check to make sure you hadn’t left yet. Almost your whole party was passed out, had gone home by cab or with someone else at this point. The club was nearly ready to shut down for the night as they started to chase people out. You saw him peek around into the VIP booth area as you smiled and waved to him reassuringly. That same tightness coiled in his chest as he rushed to the employee locker room.
A fellow pole dancer who was peeling off his skintight, laced finger-less gloves perked an eyebrow up at the rushing blond. He hadn’t seen the worker so eager to get out of there before.
“Some kind of big surprise waiting for you outside those doors or something, hot stuff?” He asked. Changkyun shook his head, too busy searching for his clutch behind his fur coat so he could meet up with you. Yanking on the furry sleeves that felt almost too warm all of a sudden, he snatched the no longer hidden clutch from his locker shelf and slammed it shut.
“Something better,” he breathed in promise to himself more than his coworker as he jogged out, his long coat bouncing off the back of his knees. He came out of the room, seeing you standing and in the company of a different worker who was still relatively new to Fantasia Dyed. A rookie at best and his eyes hardened as the man spoke to you.
Leaning far too close to you, breathing too close to you and smiling far too seductively at you. He was clearly looking for a bed to crash in, but Changkyun hated it. Loathed it even as he felt his lips pull back in a grimace mimicking a defensive mutt. He stomped towards you and inserted himself between the nuisance and yourself.
Pushing his palms against the worker’s chest, he harshly shoved him backwards and took a few steps back himself towards you. He felt like he was on fire, feeling you standing directly behind him. He thought he could feel your warmth radiating onto his back like sun rays and it almost made him sweat. He felt torn between feeling ecstatic that you were so close to him or completely pissed off at the man who stood shell shocked after being pushed away.
“She’s taken already,” Changkyun growled. He shocked even himself with his tone, something coiling further and beating in his chest so violently he swore he felt his chest jerk forward with each beat of his heart.
The coworker raised his hands. “Chill out, man. ‘Didn’t know she was yours.” Something ignited the coil in Changkyun’s chest and sent sparks in his mind at the man's words. His? Yes… that sounds exactly right.
It sounded blissfully perfect as the man walked off and the blond turned around to see you and properly escort you out of Fantasia Dyed. He watched your back as you left in front of him- ladies first- and he let a grin crawl across his face. Unaware of how his eyes looked as they burned into the silhouette of your body.
His.
Changkyun led you out of the club, but neither of you expected it to be raining at three o’clock in the morning. You gasped as you instinctively brought your hands up above your head. You were wearing makeup and if it got wet, it was all over. Changkyun was quick to rip the coat from his shoulders and sling it around you. It had no hood, but he placed the collar of it above your head as you grabbed the edges of it to pull it around your body.
He nearly gasped when his finger brushed your hand, handing off his coat before he was pulling his keys from his clutch and pushing buttons to unlock his car that was parked just around the corner on the side of the building. He reached around your shoulder and started directing you in the rain.
It was only when he sat you in his car, nice and dry, when he ran to get into the drivers sid, slam the door shut, start the car and crank the heat to get rid of the wet shivers you had due to the rain, did he realize he had just touched you again. Although his coat was under his arm, so were you as you ran through the rain. He had to contain yet another delightful shiver.
You shimmied the coat off your head to around your shoulders before you pulled it out from behind you and placed it on your lap as you pulled the seatbelt across your chest. You looked at Changkyun who was already looking at you, but flinched and started fidgeting with his wheel and knobs for the radio in his car to distract himself.
“I didn’t realize there was rain in the forecast this morning. I wouldn’ve have brought an umbrella.” You briefly blessed the idea that Changkyun asked you out because you had taken the bus and walked the rest of the trip to Fantasia, so getting home would have been a long walk considering the buses don’t run at three freakin’ am.
Changkyun cleared his throat, whipping his blond, wet bangs out of his face and onto the top of his head, clearing his forehead as he shifted out of park.
“So,” he started, “where do you want to go?” You tossed ideas around in your head and it was so early, hardly any place would be open except the occasional fast food place or gas station. Offering him the choice between an open, probably dead lobby for some fast food or grabbing a drink and hanging in the car in the rain, he was driving off to the closest food location.
As nice as it sounded being secluded in a car with coffee and the sound of rain, he wouldn't be able to look you in the eyes as you spoke as well.
Changkyun took you to the place he would often stop for some after work food before going home or meeting up with someone. Because he knew the manager so well (and because the manager was always in store by three to start preparing for the staff to come in at six) Changkyun was allowed an early entrance.
Even though you offered to get your own drink, Changkyun wasn’t allowing you to pay for anything since it was him who asked you out. Besides, it wasn’t exactly expensive to buy some caffeinated drinks- especially since he got a special discount too. The manager who always got him his food or drinks ready at this hour was shocked to see him with company this time around.
Time seemed to become truly nonexistent to Changkyun as soon as the both of you sat down at a back corner table- away from anyone's eyes from outside as to not cause the manager grief if someone should come demanding entrance because Changkyun was inside. You both talked about anything and everything he could think to ask you to get to know you better.
He learned that you were a librarian and that you didn’t go to school- forgetting about any further education after high school because you weren’t sure what you really wanted to do with your life. He found out bits and pieces about your family situations- gathering that you weren’t close and that you had no siblings to speak of. Your friends were small in number and that you weren’t really close to anyone aside from Halie- the proffered birthday girl at the club.
He mentally thanked Halie for begging you to come to the club, considering if you hadn’t Changkyun would have never laid eyes on you.
In turn, he shared what he could in return for your stories. He had been working in the sex world for a few years now, quickly and unfortunately getting roped into it after a nasty breakup when he had just turned 21. When he realized just how desirable he could be, he started working out and eating better to keep his physique so business kept rolling in for him. He was actually scouted by the assistant manager of Fantasia Dyed to work there- but it was the pay and benefits that really dragged him in. He didn’t dislike his career, so he had no reason to say no anyways.
At least with Fantasia Dyed, he had benefits to get himself into the doctor if one of his clients ever lied and gave him some gross sex disease- then of course he’d sue them into the ground for not following his work guidelines. He told you about why he pierced his eyebrow and even the stories behind the tattoos on his back.
Oddly enough, despite your absolute opposite backgrounds, you both spoke and got alone brilliantly. It was a balance of lifestyles and Changkyun basked in everything you had to say. You didn’t shun him or sneer at his life as a sex worker and maybe it was the lack of disgust and prejudiced that really flipped something in his head.
You did not judge him. You did not hate him. You laughed at whatever joke he pitched. You blushed at whatever lame pick up line he slid into conversation. You groaned playfully at his equally playful flirting. You were making him fall and he did- hook, line and heavy sinker.
He was absolutely, unbelievably head over heels for you and he felt like he was on fire.
You both talked and talked until you had noticed that the sky started to change color and the rain had stopped. The sun was rising and you were suddenly overly aware of how exhausted you really were. Changkyun saw you stifle a yawn and although it felt like his heartstrings were going to tear in his chest, he was quick to get up and offer you a ride home as the manager started to truly open the lobby for business as nearly all morning staff were present.
As you sat in the car with him, directing him on what roads to take to get to your home, he found himself memorizing every turn. When you told him to keep it slow and then pointed out your small little apartment duplex, he looked at every crevice his eyes could see from the car window. The neighborhood was somewhere small, but there was a small park just across the block so he expected it to be fairly busy during the day.
As he bid you farewell, and watched you get safely inside before driving away, he struggled to contain his breath. When he rolled into the apartment parking lot and up to his penthouse, he was quick to lock his door and lift his coat to his face.
It smelt different than usual. It had your shampoo’s scent embedded into its fake fur. It had the smell of your perfume and the smell of you inside of it. He fell asleep that morning until afternoon with his coat curled around him instead of a blanket. That feeling of euphoria chasing him until he finally fell asleep- only to have a set of specific dreams involving you in one of his reserved back rooms at Fantasia Dyed.
-x-x-x-
Over the course of the next week, Changkyun did his damnedest to keep his eyes on you at all times he possibly could. He’d wake up in the afternoon and find a way to enter the library you worked at and slip into a corner behind a bookshelf with a book to disguise his obvious staring of you. When you’d leave the desk to replace books, he’d move to avoid your eyes, when you’d help a guest with their books to check out, he’d growl when it was a man that you smiled at. When you got off work, he’d trial behind you just enough to stay unnoticed. He’d watch you get home every afternoon and one night he even put a small camera on one of the fake branches of your fake bush you hand sitting in a pot on your porch.
He’d sit in his car or in his penthouse and watch the feed on his phone if it buzzed with a notification of movement. If you were leaving, he’d jump into action to try and find out where you were going if it was an unusual time. He’d watch you go to the store to shop or into some food place for something to eat.
He’s even seen you meet up with Halie a few times and each time he did, he hated that wench more and more. That obviously spoiled princess wasn’t good enough to be around you, acting like a typical romance villain and obvious snake. You were smart, so he was curious as to why you trusted her so much. She was clearly brainwashing you and keeping you around as a tool.
Changkyun had a mental list of enemies and people he hated, and she was ranked number one among that list- along with all the men he saw speak or flirt with you. He wanted to get them away from you, throw them out of the picture and clean your mind of their filth.
During his work hours, and after even, he’d still get randoms to get into bed with him- but his mind would be filled with everything about you. The person underneath him would disappear and your face and body and voice would take hold in his brain like some sort of spell. He’d fuck into man or woman with such fervor he’d be getting calls from his manager that he was requested for service back to back.
He hit euphoria and erotic highs with you just in his mind, he nearly came undone when he thought how it would feel actually fucking you. He’d go home from work, from another sex session and he’d lay on his bed, on his couch, sit at his table or collapse in his doorway and wear himself thin with his hand at the thought of your touch instead of his or someone else.
He sat on the cold floor of his front door entrance, his leather, skintight pants unzipped and cock slipped through the hole in his boxers. His hand squeezed his length as his fingers rubbed and pinched and squeezed around the head and slit. It was so dry as his hand slid up and down painfully on his shaft. His hips bucked to meet his hands motions and his legs twitched in their perched, spread position. His stomach was tight as his opposite hand came to pinch and twist his nipples- his shirt discarded as he slid down the door upon his entry earlier.
It was so dry- it was hardly enjoyable- but it was painfully erotic. He couldn’t stop and the precum leaking from his cockhead wasn’t nearly enough for his hand to not pull on the delicate skin making him hiss. Taking his lip between his teeth and breathing so heavily he stuttered, he watched his hand abuse his cock.
The hand that played with his nipples shot down to hold his wrist as he finished himself off, cumming with the sound of your name spilling from his lips in lewd, breathless moans. He lay on the floor, slouched and exhausted as cum stuck, drying to his chest and pants.
He was so utterly, disgustingly, blissfully obsessed with you and he felt like he was losing his mind. His mind was filled to the brim with you, you, you. He spent every waking hour he could preparing. Yes, he had to make sure that everything would be perfect for when you’d finally come to him.
You deserved nothing short of perfection- and Changkyun would fuck anyone, get paid anything and obtain whatever it was you desired to make sure you got exactly that. However, it would take time- much to his dismay.
He knew he had to get ready before he could possibly have you. He started cleaning out a room he used as storage in his penthouse and got to work.
It was ten days after your three am date that Changkyun decided to play innocent and ‘bump’ into you at work one day. He was impatient and couldn’t wait any longer to speak to you again, to hear your voice directed at him again and not at someone else.
He entered the library confidently that day, dressed in blue jeans, low heeled boots and a tee that was stretched just a bit at the collar. His hair unstyled and glasses on his nose with his clutch under his arm. He didn’t want to go over the top in style, so he tried to match your neutral style of dress.
He took a moment to look at you before he took a breath and walked up to the desk, placing a fake smile of shock on his face when you looked up to see him. He nearly fell to his knees when he saw your eyes shine and your mouth split into a smile and wave at him. If he could, he would’ve ran the rest of the way to the desk instead of walked.
When he walked at the desk, he leaned and laid his arms in front of one another on the desktop, bending and crossing his ankles together and grinned at you.
“Well, fancy meeting you here, madam librarian,” he greeted, acting as if he hadn’t been here daily for the past week just to see you work.
“It’s been a little bit, it’s good to see you Changkyun,” you said and he felt himself shift sinfully. “I’d ask you why you’re here, but it’s a library, so,” you chuckled at yourself. Oh, how he missed the sound of that laugh. “Did you come looking for something specific?” You asked as he jut his lip out in thought.
“Not necessarily. I just felt like cracking open a book, and what better place to start looking? It's a pleasant surprise you work at this library. It’s close to where I live.” That was true, there were two other libraries in town and this one was the closest to him. You hummed at him. “Could you recommend something to me?” He grew giddy when you smiled widely and stood from your desk chair and started to walk around the desk, motioning for him to follow you.
As you asked him what he liked and disliked, leading him down the isles and scanning book after book, keeping small conversation he wished he could push you against a bookshelf and have his wicked way with you. He knew better, however; you needed to be taken care of in a specific set of ways and against a bookshelf wasn’t it- tempting as it may be.
“Here,” you told him as you spun around and placed a book in his hands. As he took it, he quirked a small, teasing smile as he looked at you as if you were playing a joke on him.
“Twilight? Really, Y/n?” In his hand sat the book that sprung up the cheesy, cliche and overall, not so great movies he watched with one of his old friends for gags one night in his teens- completely drunk he may add.
“Hey, don’t judge a book by it’s cover- or it’s movies. It’s better than you think.” You shoved the book closer to his chest. “Just give it a chance, please?” When you ask so adorably with your lip jutted out just enough for him to fantasize leaning down to bite into it with his teeth, he had no choice but to comply. He’d read this book cover to cover, backwards even had you asked. He’d do whatever you wished.
He spent the afternoon halfway reading at a table near the desk and halfway watching you work until your shift concluded. When you were packing up, he scrambled to get his clutch and mark the page he had to reread over and over again because he couldn’t concentrate and rushed up and over to your side.
“Are you finished for the day?” He asked although he already knew the answer. You nodded as he touched your arm, grabbing gently around your elbow. “Do you want to go on a date with me?” He asked as he saw your cheeks grew in the most vibrant color of rose.
“I, uh,” you cleared your throat and rubbed the back of your neck with your free arm. “I’m not dressed for a date though,” you pouted. Changkyun licked his lips, desperate not to let you get away from him just yet.
“Then, tomorrow,” he pitched, “when you’re free tomorrow we can go out.” Tomorrow was Wednesday, and he knew that you always left work early on Wednesdays. He watched you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear as you licked your lips before rolling them over your teeth and then opening your mouth.
“I can do tomorrow,” you muttered, face fully flushed with redness flooding into the tips of your ears. He released your arm with a giant smile. He flicked his bangs out of his face as he felt his glasses slip just a bit further down his nose. He reached into his clutch as he dug out his phone and handed it to you with the new contact screen up.
“Let’s swap numbers then, and we can work out everything through the phone.” You didn’t hesitate to place your number into his phone before sending yourself a text with ‘it’s changkyun’ attached to the message. You promptly added him in your contacts as well. Offering you a ride home, which you took, he dropped you off and when he walked into his penthouse that afternoon he pumped his fist into the air. As well as stared at the palm in which held your arm earlier, gazing at it as if he had just touched the blessed body of a holy messiah.
As he sat in his living room on the couch, he felt himself harden in his sweats he wore before changing into his work attire. He had actually called in to take the night off since he had to be well rested for his date tomorrow. This hand had touched you, touched your skin. He was sure it would feel magnificent on his cock too.
-x-x-x-
Tomorrow didn’t come fast enough and Changkyun was bounding out of bed at the ass crack of dawn to figure out what he was going to wear. How would he style his hair? Would he fill all his ear piercings or change the stud in his eyebrow to a spike? Which shoes would he wear: sneakers, heeled boots, sandals? He couldn’t waste another second in bed, he had far too much to plan for the day to worry about sleeping any more.
He dove for his phone the moment he heard the specific notification he set for you. He talked to you a bit and you both decided on a time to meet up. Meeting up at noon for lunch and then he’d take you to a movie and then he’d walk around with you window shopping, talking about the movie you both saw and then he’d take you for dinner. That’s what he wanted to happen.
He showed up at the meeting place half an hour early. Wearing a black, white spotted button up tucked into a pair of black jeans with a thin, white belt around his waist, he adjusted the buttons at the cuffs of his sleeves. A simple, thin silver chain to show off his neck as his shirt was unbuttoned just enough to show off his collar bones. The heels of his shoes clacked just enough on pavement or tile to let people know he was coming.
“Changkyun!” He heard from behind him. He raised himself off the bench had had been sitting cross-legged on, staring at his phone and debating on texting you. He quickly spotted you waving to him from among the crowd of people on the hunt for lunch before their work break ends.
His mouth nearly dropped when he saw you. Running up to him with the cutest, apparel on.
A summer dress of pale pink with small white dots that wrapped around your chest and fell loosely at the skirt to hit your thighs. The sleeves off shoulder and sheer all the way down your arm until it wrapped around your wrist in sheere frills. Black, thin straps to keep it all up. A pair of white sandals that wrapped around your foot and ankle with the smallest heel to keep you from twisting your ankle. Hair done in two little buns on either side of your head, but still kept some down with a black, stretchy choker around your neck.
The pink, circular satchel at your waist that hooked over your shoulder probably contained your phone, wallet and the pink gloss that covered your lips as you came to stop in front of him. You were like a flower as he gazed at you. You quickly lifted your wrist to check the thin watch you wore, making sure you weren’t late. You weren’t.
“I hope you weren’t waiting here too long for me,” you giggled and he felt his heart try to burst from his chest. He shook off his stupor the best he could in front of you before he smiled and quickly denied it.
“I haven’t been here long,” he assured. You made a small jest about the both of you wearing something with small polka dots on it and he felt like he was going to fall to his knees at your noticing his attire and complimenting it. You were far too precious.
Throughout the day, he found out that you weren’t only exceptionally kind, but you were probably the biggest pushover he’s ever met. You’d follow after him like a little lost duckling and whatever he recommended doing, wherever he wanted to go, you were quick to agree and comply. With your ease of compliance, he was able to mentally go through the check list of plans he had set with little to no difficulty.
It was miraculous how easily you obeyed him.
Changkyun made note of everything your eyes lingered on, everything your fingers brushed, everything you expressed just the slightest interest in- he would remember. Changkyun wanted to spoil you, wanted to give you everything you desired- everything you deserved. You were an angel walking, cursed upon the earth and nothing anyone could say would change his mind about it.
The entire time you were out with Changkyun that day, you were smiling at him as he hung onto every one of your words. Every interest, every detail, every idea or opinion you had- he grabbed it and held it deep inside his chest.
It was coming close to around ten that night when he was finally getting around to dropping you back home, as he could see the exhaustion in your eyes and the slowness in your steps. He had half a mind to just drive you back to his home, but he couldn’t- not yet.
He walked you to your door as he bid you a final goodnight and as you unlocked your door and pushed it open just a crack, you turned back to him and smiled. He froze when he felt your fingers on his cheek before you stood to your toes and kissed his cheek. You rushed inside before he could say anything and before you could regret it.
The blond sat dazed and only managed to drive a block away before he pulled into a parking lot of a closed, daytime store. His cheeks were flushed, his skin burned and his breath was staggered. He could still feel the feeling of your lips on his cheek and that shiver of delight attacked his spine and spread until he was finishing himself off in the front seat of his car- the sound of your name on his lips over and over again as his fingers brushed his cheek trying to feel the essence of you in his skin.
-x-x-x-
Changkyun had the privilege of taking you out on two more dates over the course of the last two weeks (along with his library trips to visit you) and it was today, when he once again frequented the library- where he noticed you weren’t in your usual high spirits. He pulled you aside on your break and into a back corner library table as he made you spill your guts on what could be plaguing your mind.
It took all of his will power to not scream when you told him you had been being harassed by some library guest who always comes in. He always wants the same book renewed over and over and he always tried to pry your number out of you. Even after clearly telling him no and explaining to you that you were traveling among the silver lining of a relationship with Changkyun- he was persistent. It came to the point you were looking over your shoulder and even jogging to and from work.
“So, he’s stalking you?” Changkyun clarified, as you nodded weakly. He grit his teeth, his jaw tightening. Didn’t other people know that his woman was off limits, especially when it came to following you around? He kept you under his watchful eye, but these men were after something far worse and in his sick, demented mind- they were the offender and they were a disease.
Changkyun reached across the table and gently held your hand, trying to convey that he knew that you were scared and that he’d do anything to keep you safe. He could see the tears glisten around your eyes and a taboo sense of arousal shot in his stomach at seeing your so utterly weak and vulnerable.
He spent the remainder of the time with you on your break as he consoled and shushed you as he promised that he’d stay until you got off and when you did, he’d take you home. You were quick to agree.
That afternoon you rushed to Changkyun’s side and were discreet to point out the man who was hanging outside the library entrance with his nose in his phone. According to you, that was the perpetrator and source of your fear. You clung to Changkyun as he gently wrapped his arm around your shoulders and held you to his chest, walking out with you.
When he dropped you off and kissed the top of your head as he sent you inside, the gentle eyes he had been gazing at you with disappeared as you shut the door and he heard it harshly lock.
Turning around and stuffing his hands inside the pockets of his jeans, he waltzed back towards his car, but never got into it. His dark shirt allowed him to dip below the hood of his car as he started walking around in the shadows the street lights created. He stood behind a post as he watched the figure move from the side of the building to the front porch where he crouched below the windows.
You had pulled the curtains and shut the blinds just as he had reminded you to as he was quick to walk up behind the stalker and hook his arm under the man’s chin. The gasp that was pulled from the man was cut off as Changkyun’s arm tightened around his neck and he started to quickly drag the man backward and away from your doorstep.
The blond shoved the man into the backseat of his car, slamming the door as he quickly rushed to get into the driver's seat. Not bothering with his seatbelt, he started the car with tangible rage and started off.
“What the fuck, man!” The man from his backseat scowled as Changkyun only reached into his center console and pulled out a small, black handheld device, pressing the button on the side of it as it zapped. A stungun. The man in the back hissed as he instinctively shut up.
Changkyun’s aggressive driving made the man in the backseat fall back and forth along the seats before he finally gripped the passenger chair to steady himself. Changkyun drove and drove until he was well outside of city limits before he stopped and parked his car. He peered up into the rear-view mirror, seeing the man behind him look around anxiously.
“Get out,” the blond ordered as he stepped out of his car. The man didn’t move, too shocked to process his words and was then yanked out by his shirt clad shoulder when he didn’t listen quick enough for Changkyun’s liking. The club worker threw the man on the ground as he rolled to his back just quick enough for Changkyun to stand over him. His feet on either side of his hips, a glimmer in his eyes that was menacing to witness- even in the darkness of night.
The man on the ground shuddered as he weakly tried to crawl backward on his elbows. His heels kicked and dug into the ground, threatening to pull his shoe off, as he tried to get away from the look in the blond’s eyes.
Changkyun’s foot came to the center of the man’s chest as he stomped, pushing him flat onto the ground. He knelt, coming closer to him as he gripped the collar of his shirt. Changkyun eyed him around- he certainly wasn’t a looker that's for damn sure.
“You really thought you had a chance?” He asked lowly, almost in a growl. “I’ll offer you a bit of last moment advice for perhaps your next life,” he got closer to the man’s ear, before telling him something. “Stay away from things that don’t belong to you,” he seethed.
Over the course of the next few days, Changkyun was delighted to see you smiling again when you told him that the man who had been stalking you seemed to finally leave you alone.
He made sure that a week later when he saw missing person posters out in the streets, your eyes stayed off of them.
-x-x-x-
After a month of dates, library visits, phone calls and good morning and good night texts, Changkyun was finally- finally- able to call you his girlfriend. He was currently out with you at some cafe where you wanted to stop and get something to drink and he decided to walk in and sit down with you for a while.
You were on your phone, tapping away before placing it down and repeating. You were obviously talking with someone on the other end of your text thread, which already ground his gears, but the twisted brow on your face made him more curious than not. Someone was upsetting you and he already knew how to deal with someone who upset you.
“Hey,” he called, gaining your attention. You looked at him, placing your phone back down. “Who’re you talking to, Sweetness?”
“Oh, just to Halie,” you told him. The name of your ‘best friend’ making his skin itch. That fake fraud of a friend couldn’t even leave you alone while you were out with him? The audacity of the woman made him jittery. His knee began to bounce as he pressed further.
“Are you two fighting? You look annoyed.”
You sighed, solidifying that she was indeed bothering you. “She’s mad that I’m out on a date,” you grumbled. Changkyun cocked his head.
“Excuse me?” His resentment slipped out just a small fraction as he wanted to know immediately what this witch was putting into your precious little head. “She’s mad at you for what?”
You groaned again, placing your elbow on the table and your chin in your palm, you huffed. “I think she’s just upset that I have a boyfriend before she does since she knows more people.” The tone in your voice made your annoyance apparent to Changkyun who had spent the last month of his life learning every little quirk in your day to day life- including your vocal tone. “She’s got a whole list of friends and while I have just enough to count on one hand, she's mad about my relationship.”
Changkyun watched you toil the situation around in your head, trying to justify her words and actions, but he couldn’t let you do that. This was a prime opportunity. The perfect time to finally get that wench out of the picture and away from you.
He reached across the table where he sat in front of you, careful not to knock into your drink.
“Darling,” he cooed, gaining your teary, stress filled eyes, “maybe you shouldn’t be talking to her.” He watched your brow quirk and turn inwards at his suggestion. He readjusted his grip on your hand, holding it tightly. “If she’s so angry about something like us, then maybe you should go on a little break at least.”
“But-”
“I know she’s your friend,” he fought back before you could try and save Halie’s snake skin, “but every time you talk about her with me, it’s all things that stress you out or things she’s done that make you uncomfortable.” He vividly remembers the club night of her birthday. “Pressuring you into clubbing, then not paying attention to you at all even though you weren’t enjoying yourself. Never talking to you unless she needs something or someone to bother. Now, she’s angry because you’re happy with me? She’s just using you, Sweetheart.”
“I know she seems bad, but-”
“Y/n,” he breathed in a small, soft scolding tone. “You can’t keep defending her and giving her what she wants. She has to learn, one way or the other.” He watched your lips turn into a pout as he ran his thumb over your knuckles and brought your hand up to kiss the back of it. “I just want the best for you, you know that.”
He bit back a victorious smirk when you told him that you’d take his suggestion and advice to heart and think about it. A little more nudging and you’d drop Halie like a hat. He just had to wait until she brought something else up again that put a target on her back.
It didn’t take but three days for that to occur.
You were home, off on a Sunday, just sitting in your home, on the phone with Changkyun while he just woke up from resting since he had work at Fantasia Dyed that evening. He had some private show booked up so he couldn’t afford to flake out either. He needed the cash for his personal project he always teased, and this coming party was sure to deliver.
You both were chatting happily until you were cut shut but someone pounding on your door. You told Changkyun to hold on a moment as you set your phone down on the arm of your couch and went to the door. Changkyun on the other hand went and immediately opened the camera footage of your front door he had from that camera in your bush.
He growled and jumped out of bed when he saw the back of Halie in the frame. Her arms were crossed and her leg was bouncing as she slouched. When you opened the door, her crossed arms flared out and she was clearly shouting at you from the hiking of her shoulders and the fact that he could hear her obnoxious voice through the call line.
He jumped out of bed. Nothing but sweats on as he threw on a jacket, leaving his chest naked before he was out of his penthouse, racing down the stairs and in his car on the way to your home. He kept the call live- as much as he didn’t want to hear her voice- so he could hear the venom she spat at you as he worked her way inside. Stomping around and screaming like the bitch she was.
When he showed up to your home and jumped out of the car, he finally hung the call up as he stormed inside, knowing the door was unlocked from Halie’s tempertatrum. When he came in, he saw you against the wall with your ‘best friend’ not a foot away from you still screaming at you like you were deaf.
He worked his way over before he was grabbing Halie’s shoulder, shoving her away and placing himself in front of you, walking back into your space until he felt your hands push on his shoulders. He glared at the party animal blonde in front of him.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He seethed as she seemed taken aback by his language towards her- a lady.
“Excuse me?” She spat.
“I suggest you leave, or else I’ll make you leave.”
“You can’t make me do anything. This isn’t your home either. I’m just talking to, Y/n.” Changkyun stepped away from you, turning the woman around by her shoulders and started pushing her.
“Yeah? And you’re done now. Get out.” He told her, shoving her out the doorway once he worked her through the front room. Before she could fight back, he got close to her ear and told her one more thing before shutting the door in her face and locking. “Stay away, or I’ll make you.” The look in his eyes, the crazed dangerous gleam, made his threat very, very real.
When he turned back around, he saw you on the ground, curled up as you cried. He rushed to your side, rubbing your back and trying to get you to lift your head to look at him. He cooed when he saw your swollen eyes and fat tears rolling down your cheeks.
“Hey, it’s okay. I’m here,” he shushed as you just wordlessly nodded with choked hiccups and sputters. You were seriously an ugly crier, but what could you do? Your best friend broke your heart.
Changkyun shifted to hold you to his bare, jacket clad chest as you cried and he shushed you.
“Don’t worry. You don’t need anyone else. I’ll always be here.” He promised.
-x-x-x-
All it took was one more month, and everything was finally falling into place for Changkyun. Halie had officially left your side, with one or two more scraps between him and her before she finally called it quits. And with the queen bee of your circle gone, the rest quickly fell apart and you were left with no one but Changkyun- as you should be.
He was in his extra bedroom, setting up his project more when his phone rang. He jumped to it, knowing it was you calling after you got done with your shift at the library. He had told you to call him when you had the chance, since he wanted you to come somewhere tonight.
“Hello, darling,” he purred into the phone, hearing you slightly chuckle on the other line. “Did work go well? No annoyances?” He asked and he knew that you’d tell him about the computers or the receipt machine or the squeaky wheel on the return cart; but you never knew that he really meant to know if you were being bothered by any other man again. “Well, if your evening is cleared up, why not swing on by Fantasia tonight?”
He heard you pause on the other side of the phone call as he was walking out of the room, shutting the door softly behind him. It was almost perfect.
“I’m not sure,” you drawled.
“I’m working the floor tonight, bar-tending for staff out sick. You can sit at the bar with me.” Your hesitation was loud and clear for him as he continued. “I’d really appreciate the company, but if you’d rather not-” he quickly heard you try and reconcile and save the conversation but agreeing to his proposal. You were a sucker for guilt trips. “Really?” He asked in faux concern as he grinned, throwing himself back across the length of his couch.
“Yeah. I’ll come, just promise that you’ll stay at the bar.”
“I’ll do my best. If I have to leave, just hide in the bathroom until I’m back,” ‘so that you won’t be in contact with anyone other than me’, he added silently in his head. You agreed and he said a quick goodbye before he hung up the call. He sat up and peered down his hall, picturing the door of his extra room. Soon, you’d be with him always.
It was an hour after his shift started and he had just served yet another waiting patron when he felt his phone buzz in the back pocket of his pants. He wore a mesh shirt at the bar that showed off his torso. His tattoo in the middle of his back was on display when he turned around. His eyebrow piercing was a black ring this evening and he wore silver hoops in his earlobes. His knee high, buckle punk boots lifting him three inches higher into the air.
‘I’m here, where do I go?’ Your text read with a nervous emoji beside it. He told you the location of the mini side stage bar and soon your head popped out from among the mass of alcohol driver party goers. As you got to the bar and slid into a stool in front of him, he leaned on the counter and whistled at you.
“Well, look who dressed up for me tonight?” He asked, a purr in his voice as your cheeks flushed. He recognized this get up, it was a piece he picked out for you one night. It wasn’t something he thought you’d ever wear out, since you were rather reserved, but he thought you deserved it anyway.
It wasn’t anything fancy, but even a simple, black cocktail dress with lace running up the sides of it and looping around your neck and back looked good when placed on someone as breathtaking as yourself to Changkyun’s eyes. He could faintly hear you clicking your heels together underneath you as they were hooked on the metal foot ring of the stool. The bracelet and earrings were a nice touch.
“I thought it was appropriate since you bought it for me,” you muttered, unable to look at him in the eyes. He chuckled since it wasn’t hard to guess why. His entire chest was on display to see with only lines of fabric separating his entire torso from being nude. He halfway wished he had gotten his nipples pierced when he was on the fence about it months ago just to see how you’d react to that.
He stood back up and turned his back and he could feel your eyes scan the tattoo that rested between his shoulders. Large and taking up a good portion of real estate on his skin. He smirked as he felt you stare, a shiver wracking up his spine just as it always did with you. When he turned around, he offered you a glass of water he had so neatly prepared for you.
“I know you don’t drink, sweetheart,” he told you as you graciously thanked him for the drink. Throughout the course of his shift, he was tending to people left and right. His charisma between patrons and ways of addressing person to person just by acknowledging how they seemed to looked amazed you.
You could never hope to be the people person he is. He was bold enough to get on stage, strip and get behind closed doors for his way of life. He was fearless in your eyes and you admired him for it. He had told you that he would stop sleeping around for money since he was in a relationship with you now, but you just told him it was alright.
You trusted him, and although the idea of him sleeping around did grind under your skin like ice and salt, you knew that was his job. He worked in this industry- the sex industry- so that was the end of it. He had started to dwindle down in client numbers though, never wanting to have the sex he was getting paid for last too long.
The clock struck midnight and Changkyun turned back to you the moment he had an opening to. He leaned over the counter and towards you again, just so he could talk to you clearly over the loud bass and whistling from the stage work.
“What do you say I make a drink for you?” He offered. You looked at your half empty glass of water he had refilled at least three times now. “Just one, I promise. It’ll be on me too. I just want my girlfriend to taste some of my work since I don’t get to work the bar often.”
“Well, when you say it like that,” you whined as he just chuckled and stood up, turning his back and started mixing. It was three minutes later when he was sliding a cocktail glass gently towards you. Inside sat a liquid of pink that resembled the color of pink lemonade, but you knew whatever was inside that wasn’t lemonade. “Voilà,” he told you. “That’s something new I’m trying out. You get to be the first to try it.”
His smile looked innocent enough to your eyes and as you started taking sips of it with a smile and a nod; however, you missed a sinister glint in his eyes. You complimented him on it and found yourself sipping on the drink, making it last until well after one since you didn’t want to have him make another. It was half after when Changkyun noticed you starting to sway in your stool seat.
He placed the towel he had in his hands on the bar before he rounded the bar to your side.
“Darling, come with me. You look like you’re about to pass out,” he chuckled. You couldn’t get your mouth to move or your voice to work as your mind was just as fuzzy as your eyesight. Were you really that much of a light weight? He took you back into one of his private rooms before he placed you on the bed. He sat beside you, brushing your hair from your face and running his fingers around your face, skin and shoulders down your arm. “Sleep. I'll come get you later,” he told you softly- the totally opposite tone of the smirk on his face.
You were in and out of it for the duration of Changkyun picking you up from the bed you vaguely remember placing you on. He picked you up and took you out of the room. The bass of the club had stopped and you only heard him speaking briefly with coworkers before he loaded you into his car.
It felt like he was taking you home as he removed you from the car again and heard the jingles of keys before a door was opened. You only remembered being placed in a bed before you felt him kiss your forehead and you were out for good.
You groaned as you were finally waking up. Your head hurt and you felt like your throat had sandpaper in it. You coughed lightly as you reached your hand up to rub your throat, but something was around your neck.
Feeling around, it felt like a collar or something. It was thick and leather, a small loop in the front of it. You also thought you felt tags near the loop that jangled. Groaning and moving among the mattress you realized that it was pitch black in the room. You were sure your eyes were open, but you couldn’t see a thing.
Sitting up, you felt around your body. Your cocktail dress wasn’t on you instead it felt like a nightgown was. Did you own nightgowns? IT feel off your shoulders to wrap around your chest and biceps with frills as it bunched around your thighs on the mattress.
Your head pounded as you rubbed your eyes. You moved to try and crawl from the bed when you felt something tug on your ankle. Feeling around, whatever was on your ankle was thick, cold and hard. At first you thought it was some anklet, but then you felt something protrude from the cold metal.
Pulling and tracing your fingers around it, you started to panic. It felt like a chain.
You got off the bed you were convinced wasn’t yours as you walked around like some cheap, budget-movie zombie in the dark room. You found a dresser first. Feeling around, you felt the knobs of the four drawers and on top it had what felt like boxes. Reaching further, you found the dresser had a mirror attached to the back of it.
Moving around in the opposite direction, you reached a closet door. Pull it open, you feel all sorts of soft fabric. Silks, satin, fur, cotton, linen- you felt all sorts of clothing.
You looked around the dark room in panic before you trusted your voice.
“Changkyun,” you called softly. You were going to call him again, but stopped short as you stepped on the cold chain that was around your foot. You screamed as you fell backward and before long, you heard someone padding up to the room and the door swung open.
You scrambled back, covering your face with your arms as you soon felt the foot of the bed push against your back, keeping you from going back any further.
“Sweetness, are you awake already?” Your arms that were up slowly lowered as you looked to the open doorway. It was so bright outside of the dark room, you had to squint from the stark contrast. Whoever was in the doorway sounded just like Changkyun, but- it couldn’t be. He walked closer to you. “Darling, can you talk?” His hand came to your throat, touching it with the pad of his fingers above the collar around your neck. “Are you thirsty? It has been half a day.”
You were speechless as Changkyun stood up from in front of you before he walked out of the room. You moved to your knees and looked around. The dresser and closet you found were indeed what you thought.
The bed was a canopy bed. A white frame with pink fabric hanging from it. The covers were red and white with a plethora of pillows at the head of the mattress. There was a rack of four wood dowels by the bedroom door, and three of them a different kind of leash, and the fourth had a pair of handcuffs.
The one window in the room was covered with black out curtains- you couldn’t tell if it was daytime or not outside right now.
Looking down now that you had the light from outside the room, you indeed did have a shackled ankle. You began to pull at it, the cold metal yanking around your skin- pinching and shafting it painfully. You hissed as your yanking was stopped by Changkyun shouting.
“Don’t pull on that!” He cried, dropping to your side to pull your hands from your shackle. “I need to put felt and fur on it before you can move around in it safely. It’ll ruin your skin, but bear with it for now.”
“Changkyun, what?” You squeaked. He smiled, but it was twisted in some sort of menacing light. Maybe it was the light from behind him into the dark room that made him look sinister. You felt yourself begin to tremble.
“Don’t you worry your pretty little head,” he told you, patting your head and tucking your hair behind your ear. “Changkyun will take care of everything. I told you to remember?” He caressed your hair, tracing his finger down your face and under your chin. He then moved to hook his finger through the hoop in your collar. “I told you, you don’t need anyone else. I’m all that you need. You are the princess, and this is your tower.” He flicked at the tags on your collar, one labeled ‘Princess’ and the other engraved with his initials.
He then reached to his side to the discarded glass of water he went to get for you earlier for your throat. He gently gripped around your neck and used the back of his hand to tilt your chin up.
The mixing of emotions in your eyes made him shiver and when you blinked out a small tear he gently moved to place his lips over it. The salty taste made him groan as he leaned back and kissed your nose to see your eyes glossy. He smiled at you as he brought the glass to your lips.
“Drink up, Princess.”
a/n: i’ve never ever written a yandere fic before in my life, and as my first try- i rly dont think i did all that bad LOL. Let me know what you think bc it’s very rare I post Monsta X fic content and I need to know if you guys are still into it ;n; (especially with Wonho’s debut days away and a fic for him in progress LOL)
#im changkyun#changkyun#monsta x#mx#changkyun x reader#i.m.#i.m. x reader#yandere!changkyun#yandere#yandere!changkyun x reader#changkyun x reader au#yandere au#changkyun fic#changkyun fanfic#changkyun fanfiction#tw
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Dee Little Snake
Series Summary: Janus uses age regression as a way to destress but has little control over it whenever he grows upset. Trying to keep a secret like that can be hard when you’re only four years old, and thus family bonding ensues in a way nobody expected, least of all Deceit.
Chapter 3: Carrots and Cuddles
Chapter Summary: Virgil and Dee are compromised by carrots; it turns out better than either of them thought it could.
Warnings: crying, mild panic, food mention
WC: 1 846
Taglist (ask to be added): @a-different-s1de @reptilian-with-scallions
General Taglist (ask to be added): @im-an-anxious-wreck
“Eat your carrots and then we can go play alright?”
Virgil leaned forward a bit and held out the fork, having taken it from Dee a few minutes ago when it became clear all he was going to do with it was push the horrible orange vegetables around his plate. Nobody in the mind scape liked vegetables except Janus- for whatever reason. Usually it was the only thing Virgil could get him to eat on the days he was feeling picky but now- Virgil sighed as Dee simply turned his head to the other side and pouted, little arms folded across his chest in a resolute pout.
“Come on buddy, everyone’s gone for now but we don’t know when they’ll be back. If you don’t eat these now you’re gonna be hungry later and I’m not letting you survive on cookies and juice boxes the entire afternoon.”
“Nuh.”
“Dee.”
“Nuh!”
Sighing again, Virgil lowered the fork. Not only was it apparently a picky day but it was also going to be a day where Dee was mostly nonverbal- which was perfectly fine besides the fact that Virgil now had no way of knowing what Dee might actually want at any given point in time, which when you have a time limit to leave the kitchen spotless by with a fussy toddler who suddenly decides to reject his tried and true favorite food it becomes the least ideal situation the living embodiment of anxiety could be in.
He regarded the carrots with distaste before holding up the fork again hopefully.
“Nuh.”
“Work with me a little Dee. No, you don’t want to play?”
“Nuh.”
No, you don’t want carrots? But these were always your favorite-” Virgil watched helplessly as the plate was firmly pushed away and arms crossed again. Did he just suck at this after not having taken care of him in so long? Were carrots not his favorite anymore? Did he just hate Virgil now because he’d taken so long to reach out again? He’d been the one to suggest that Janus take the day to be little to destress since everyone else would be with Thomas for a couple hours and they’d be free to do whatever until then, which Janus had agreed to and what they had been doing all morning until now- lunch- that Dee was stubbornly refusing.
“Just eat one alright? Just one and then I’ll make you another sandwich for later in case you get hungry.”
“Nuh.”
“Eat the carrot.”
“Nuh.”
“Dee-” Virgil was interrupted suddenly by a whooshing sound. One that sounded distinctly like someone sinking back into the mindscape. Early. While him and Dee were still sat at the table. Panicking Virgil could only stay frozen as the side began to speak, footsteps getting louder as they came towards the kitchen.
“...thought I left it in here but- oh! I didn’t realize you’d be-” Patton stopped in the doorway, a look of shock on his face as he took in the scene of Virgil sat stock still at the table with a forkful of carrot still held aloft and Dee stiff as a board as well in his own seat with his plate of uneaten carrots in front of him, both of them hardly daring to breathe as the air tensed.
“H-heya Pat! How’s it uh...how’s it going out there?”
Patton blinked. “It- um, It’s going...it’s going. Who might this be?”
They both looked at Dee who, with the air still tense and suddenly being stared at, suddenly became very overwhelmed, lower lip trembling as his eyes flicked from Virgil to Patton and back.
“Dee, you’re okay, it’s fine!” Virgil rushed out, dropping the fork in his urgency to reach for the smaller side.
“Dee?” Patton questioned and that seemed to do it. Tears spilled onto Dee’s cheeks as he began to cry, the panic of being caught finally settling in his mind as he realized Patton was not, in fact, ever meant to see him while he was small. Panicking even more, Virgil fought to keep his voice level as he quickly scooped the now bawling side into his arms and began to try and gently shush him, echoing voice betraying him as it only served to scare Dee further into his head and make him cry harder. Close to tears himself he looked desperately at Patton who seemed to finally snap out of it and sank out quickly, leaving Virgil to stare incredulously at the spot he had vacated. Was he going to tell the others? He knew he couldn't, right? Of course he didn’t he didn’t even know what was going on how would he not-
“Okay, had to step out and tell them I had a headache coming on and was going to make some tea and lie down. That’ll keep them out there and not looking for any of us! Now-” Virgil watched as Patton came a little closer, fully in Dee’s sights as he continued to cry. “I’m sorry I scared you so badly there kiddo, I just wasn’t expecting to see you is all. I can leave if you want me to but I’d like to stay and help if you’ll let me?”
Patton’s soft tones seemed to calm the toddler down significantly as he leaned more into Virgil but thankfully stopped crying, only jerking a little with lingering hiccups while he eyed the fatherlyside cautiously. Patton seemed to take it as a win however as he looked over to the carrots left abandoned on the table, wrinkling his nose in distaste. “The heck are you being fed kiddo?”
“They’re usually his favorite,” Virgil was quick to defend them both, twisting his mouth to one side as he looked at the now far too cold for comfort cooked carrots congealing at the plate. “At least they were…”
Patton didn’t comment, instead scooping up the plate and turning to Dee. “Well they can’t be any good cold. Why don’t I heat these up and maybe add something special, make them taste different hm?”
Virgil watched as Dee peaked through his slightly longer bangs at the other side, who only grinned happily and waited. Hesitantly he reached his small fist up and wiped at his eyes, nodding but still making sure to lean back into Virgil. Nodding, Patton turned and made his way to the stove, dumping the carrots into a pan and flicking the burner on. Smiling crookedly Virgil leaned down to nuzzle the top of Dee’s head softly, earning a giggle in return as he squirmed in his arms. Virgil set him back down in his chair gently and pushed his juicebox over to him while watching Patton out of the corner of his eye, who was currently trying his absolute best not to stare at them while he cooked. The carrots sizzled lightly as he added salt and what looked like brown sugar, caramelizing with the pat of butter he had also added. Virgil had to admit it smelled delicious and even Dee was leaning forward in anticipation.
“And here we go! Carrots for people who don’t like carrots!” He set the plate down gently in front of the small side, putting a clean fork next to the plate and carefully taking a seat next to Virgil. They both watched as Dee poked lightly at the carrots, Virgil ready to sigh in defeat, when he actually put a couple in his mouth, eyes lighting up and all but shoving the entire plate in his face.
“Slow down kiddo, they’’ll still be there if you use a fork!” Patton laughed lightly and turned to Virgil, who simply shook his head and mouthed “I’ll tell you later.”
“Fair enough.” Patton mouthed back. “Coffee?”
“God yes.” Accidentally breathing the yes out loud Virgil huffed out a laugh and offered Patton a smile before turning back to Dee. This...definitely wasn’t how he thought the morning would go but- he’d take it.
-----
“Age regression huh? I guess that makes sense.”
“It’s normal Pat.” Virgil’s reply came out sharper than he intended, making the moral side flinch a bit before shaking his head. “Sorry I- defensive. Protective. Whatever, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“It’s cute.” Patton’s eyes softened as he watched Virgil run his fingers through Dee’s hair, the latter fast asleep in anxiety’s lap. “You’re good with him; it’s clear he trusts and loves you a lot.”
Hiding his eyes behind his bangs so Patton wouldn’t see just how much that meant to him he nearly choked trying to answer. “Y- yeah?”
“Yeah.” Patton sat back against the couch and smiled. “I won’t tell anyone, I promise. Poor baby looked scared enough seeing me walk in, I could only imagine if it had been-”
Virgil lifted his head as Patton’s sentence caught, both of them knowing what was hanging in the air but not wanting to voice it. It was a thought better shelved for another day- one that didn’t have a four year old asleep in Virgil’s lap as he tried not to cry in relief that Patton was simply taking this in stride. Virgil could still take care of Janus when he needed it and maybe this would help his and Patton’s relationship like how it helped him and Virgil. Good. Those two needed to sit down and talk at some point and if this was the push they needed well...it was better than nothing Virgil supposed.
“Do you think he’ll be mad? That I saw him like this?” Virgil looked over at Patton twisting his fingers together painfully. “I can guess it was supposed to be secret- I really didn’t mean to walk in!”
Reaching over with his free hand Virgil batted his fingers apart to take a hand in his own. “I know, Pop-star. He’ll understand; he doesn’t hate you.”
“He doesn’t?”
Virgil looked up to see Patton’s wide eyes watering a bit as he pressed his lips together anxiously. He looked almost the exact same way Dee had when he had asked Virgil if he hated him, the memory stabbing through his chest as he squeezed Patton’s hand tightly.
“He loves you Patton, so much. He loves all of us he just-” has dumb ways of showing it. Virgil smoothed Dee’s hair down gently while rubbing Patton’s knuckles with his other hand. “He loves all of us Patton, you included. He just gets so wrapped up in playing the villain he forgets how to make sure you actually know it.”
Biting back the urge to hit himself over the head with his own hypocrisy he started a bit as Patton laid his head on his shoulder, intertwining their fingers as he relaxed. “It’s good to know that’s all it is.”
Pointedly ignoring the slight teasing tone, Virgil laid his cheek on top of Patton’s head and simply nodded. They’d have to move soon if they didn’t want to get caught but for now, being curled up on the couch as a small family felt incredibly nice. He supposed they could stay just a little longer.
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#false writes#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#dee little snake#janus sanders#deciet sanders#virgil sanders#patton sanders#familial bonding#agere#age regression#food metion
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Hiiii again 🥺 I was wondering if it’s okay if I could please request a basic matchup? Preferably with a male pls. Pronouns she/her. I am 5’4, an ambivert and a Latina. I have pale skin, mid-length brown wavy hair with bangs, and hazel eyes. I am described as someone who comes off as cold or aloof when I’m around people I don’t know. After getting to know me, I am the complete opposite. I’m just a bit shy at first lol. My friends have told me that I give good advice but like to joke about my stubbornness. I like to make people laugh and try to make the best of any situation. However I have a hard time expressing my emotions. I’m also described as easy going and fun to be around. I love animals especially dogs. I am a hip hop dancer and love to perform. Enjoy reading and playing video games. I love music especially hip hop, rap, & reggaeton. I also love to write music/poetry. I never show anybody though since I’m really shy about it. I really like drawing and painting. I can be playful and love to tease my friends. I also really like to eat and travel. I am a bit of a homebody but I enjoy hiking. I really enjoy having deep conversations. I can’t stand people who bully others and people who are fake. I like to be honest and helpful in any way I can. My style is usually anything comfy/casual and I don’t really like wearing skirts or dresses. I speak English and Spanish (learning Japanese & Portuguese). I would love to learn ASL one day as well. I enjoy watching crime investigations. I don’t really any fears, just not being able to accomplish my goals/dreams. I tend to daydream a lot and I’m also a big procrastinator 😭. I would say my love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch. I’m usually really cold towards the person I like lol. I tend to be a bit jealous/possessive in a relationship, not in an unhealthy way though. Just wouldn’t match with someone who is very flirty with other people lol. What I look for in a partner is someone that is selfless, mature and has depth to them. Also if they are really accepting because I’ve never had that growing up. An ideal date is pretty much anywhere honestly, I’m not really picky with that. Thank you so much!! 💘💘💘
DEE MATCHES YOU WITH…
SUGAWARA KOUSHI
❥ ok i believe that suga didn’t really like you at first ? like he thought you were self centered and such, but when he saw you get a little flustered when talking to someone he realized he was very wrong about you
❥ so like the sweet guy he is, he came to you and apologized about judging you too quickly
❥ that started a great friendship between yall. but that didn’t really last for long because when suga got to know you even more, he decided that he doesn’t want to only be friends with you
❥ as your boyfriend, suga is the perfect guy. he is very caring and supportive of you
❥ when you have a hard time expressing yourself, he will always be there right next to you telling you that it’s okay to not always understand yourself and that you should take all the time you need
❥ suga LOVES watching you dance and is 100% your top hype man. he would even suggest you guys try to learn a dance together
❥ you guys are always trying something new and visiting new places together
❥ seeing how brave you are is always a source of inspiration to him making him wanna achieve all sorts of things to make you proud of him
❥ late night deep conversations with him are super comforting, you guys are both able to open up and talk about all sorts of things and listen to each other freely
❥ for dates, suga really likes to take you on picnics where he also gets you guys some painting supplies so you could paint together
❥ on other days where you are both tired, you just end up ordering your favorite take out food and having a movie night in a makeshift blanket fort
❥ all in all, you and suga make quite a great couple, always inspiring and encouraging one another to move forward in life and to achieve more
<3
a/n : hdhdjdjdb IM TERRIBLY SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG IN THESE I JUST DIDNT HAVE MUCH MOTIVATION AT THE TIME IM REALLY SORRY
#dee.ships#haikyuu#haikyuu matchups#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu fluff#sugawara koushi#suga x reader#sugawara fluff#sugawara x reader
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My mom always used to say that it was good that we had mice - because it meant that we didnt have rats.
My family told this story over and over about my uncle waking up and finding a rat on his bed - it was when he decided he really needed to move
I was thinking about how the time we left, i heard rats in the walls.... just sliding down the fucking wall. And id bang on it to make them go away. For a moment i remembered it as just normal
But it wasnt. Most of my life at my house, we didnt have rats. And i was mortified when they showed up
But i just... got used to it. It bothered me... and i didnt like seeing them in the kitchen at night...but i just.... dealt with it
A hole appeared on my ceiling in the last couple years - it was the size of a the ink in a pen. My mother kept spilling stuff and it would pour into my room. I was fighting with her over it.
She broke everything that wasnt broken in the house. I started taping up the walls and the floors to keep the wolf spiders in the basement and out of rooms that i sat in
I was terried to clean the house because i knew at any moment a giant spider could come running out of where i was cleaning
The animals pissing and shitting everywhere could be changed if people didnt allow them. Shit being caked into the floorboards could be changed in my grandfather gave a fuck.
I can never show ppl the horrors that i saw because i never took pictures. I just got sick it was every few months and immediately started to clean. I didnt want to prolong the experience or resentment by taking pictures...
I didnt want to leave that house. It was my home. It will always be my home.
My creepy smelly haunted ancient falling apart infested home.
The toilets were like the first plumbing ever made when we moved in. There was black seaweed like stuff swimming at the bottom. It would overflow everytime you flushed it and pour through the living room ceiling...
he windows were disgusting and dirty and they didnt stay up on theirg own
My rooms floor was seperating from the wall. There was cat litter behind the radiator that no matter how hard i cleaned - i coildnt get - a reminder of my 18 year old cats habbits
The back door was broken. My mom put plastic on it which the cats ripped open to jump through like a doggy door - scaring the life out of me. The glass door past it didnt shut - my mom tied a leash to it and kept it closed that way. It would swing open with the wind and creek.
The ghosts scared me
The sheds were falling apart
The barn had carpenter bees
The hayfeild was next to the turnpike and two other major roads... it was loud and there was no privacy
The third feild was mostly marshland
The property was full of poisonous plants that could paralyze you and picky weeds that burned if they touched you. The small little feild at the bottom always had too many bees
The backyard sloped
But there was so much beauty. Though the crick was drying up from the houses built on the other side of the hill - i remembered the ducks and filling up water buckets and daydreaming in the tree above. Trying to get accross the rocks and my dog drinking. The big stream where i went swimming and once saw a lobster. The feild was open - multiflora rose gone to the hungry goats over the years. The trees that used to be apple trees where i sat and ate till i was full and the spot where my favorite one stood - where my mom and i had picnics.
That feeling from the back feild tbat felt like true serenity and the cool sheild from the summer heat beneath the congested bit of pine trees.
I remember my trecks down the crick - trying to jump from rock to rock
And the time i tried to stand on the ice where the marsh was - enjoying watching my family ice skate before falling and hurting my head
The quiet snowy nights that i sled down the hayfeild with my aunt
The warm fluffy feeling of a barn FULL of animals.
The sheds that alternated as storage or more room for more animals.
The path i used to take up to the barn before everything on the path fell apart
Id walk around and find peices.... things.... that my mom, me, or someone in my family had set down.... not knowing that it would never be picked up again
Our animal graveyard.... because we loved them so much...
The reminince where the big light used to shine over the ducks and backyard - when we had night parties with candles and tents and all the normal stuff a family has
The back of the house leading to the basement where my first dog used to live and my personal garden leading up to it
The dog yard with the table - the first place i played with my greatgrandmothers dog before we moved into the house
The comfort of my parking lot - knowing that im finally home
Driving to the top of the hill before getting there and looking down on my property- the send setting over the lake so beautifully.
My house was in ruins.... all my momories were there. All the love.... you could find peices of it everywhere
So i was just thinking.... how there were rats in my walls... but they ended up being just an annoying addition that i didnt put much thought into
Because id put up with a lot to keep something i love....
And idk what to do about it. Without my pets it was already hard. Watching everything i knew and loved break fall apart and be abandoned... was hard for a number of years. The place doesnt mean so much witout my animals and family - all the love that made it was a warm place. Even if i could have afforded to keep it... it wouldnt be a nice place to be alone...
But it all went so fast... just like my mom.... and i still dont know how to face that.
I always dream that im there. I always dream im with my mom.
I cant make another place full of love and warmth.... without everything and everyone that is was lost at that house....
Although its a skeliton now it still encapsulates those memories...: and while it hurt to keep remembering things that were gone... now i remember them but its not tangible
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It’s Vegas, Baby - Chapter II
Summary: Nesta goes out to the store and so does Cassian. Classic Nesta, she thinks he’s stalking her. Trust me it’s more interesting than it sounds lol(I hope)
Word Count: 2k
A/N: I'm back on my grind yall *sunglasses emoji*
Nicknames:
Feyby- Feyre(its supposed to be like feyre and baby put together cause shes the baby of the family)
Nestella- Nesta(its supposed to be nesta and nutella. u will learn more later;)
Tiny Ancient One- Amren(kinda self explanatory)
Mor Boobiez Plz- Mor(idk i just thought it was funny lol)
"I'm home!" Nesta calls out to Feyre. She can smell pizza and instantly strides towards the kitchen, where she finds Feyre with a large cheese pizza still in the box, half-eaten.
"Finally! I was beginning to wonder if you and Cassian finally acknowledged the sexual tension between yourselves and fucked."
"Feyre! That is not appropriate to say at all! Cassian and I are barely colleagues, we will never be anything so stop with your meddling!" Nesta replied, trying to will down a bright red blush. Feyre and her boyfriend, Rhys, had this insane idea that she and Cassian were made for each other, it didn't help that Cassian was constantly flirting with her either.
"We're back!" Mor and Amren had just gotten home from some party, with Mor holding Duchess, their shared Chinese Crested Dog. When the four of them bought a penthouse together Feyre and Mor wanted a dog, and Nesta and Amren didn't. After begging and pleading with her sister and friend to please give him away after they adopted him they finally decided to just lock her, Amren, and Duchess in a room together. They all became friends, and they found out that Duchess was, in fact, a boy. They had been calling him Duchess for too long, though, so when they called him Duke he wouldn't reply so the name just stuck. When the rest of their inner circle found out-"the rest" being Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys- they didn't stop teasing them for days. In their defense, he had a very small you-know-what and he was a very ladylike boy.
"Bring my baby boy to me! Oh I wove you so much you wittle cutie pie!" Feyre was letting Duchess lick her face, making Nesta gag. Sure she loved the dog, but seriously, he licks his butt.
"Ugh, Mor, your cousin is working me to the bone! And he won't stop trying to push me and Cassian together! He thinks he can push us together just cause we “have hella sexual tension”! Also, I was thinking about this last night, Rhys is dating Feyre and if I'm Feyres sister and he's Cassians brother, that's literally incest!"
"You know they aren't actually brothers, right? They're just best friends." Mor replied, trying not to laugh at Nesta's flustered expression. She put down Duchess and reached for a slice of pizza. Everyone knew that it was just a matter of time before Nesta and Cassian got together. Nesta and Mor were the only single people in the house, not including Duchess. And Mor was just recently dumped so she was in a big love life meddling mood. Amren was dating some guy named Varian, and Feyre... Well, let's just say that it's a miracle that she's here right now and not out getting nailed by Rhys.
"I know that, but still. They refer to themselves as brothers."
"So you're saying that if they didn't call themselves brothers you would have sex with Cassian! I knew it!"
"No, Feyre, I am not saying that! Besides, he flirts with everyone so even if I was into him- which I am not - we probably wouldn't become a thing."
"Keyword being probably." Mor says with a smirk.
"Enough of all this bickering, I'm hungry and bored so someone turn on the T.V. while I make some popcorn." Amren quickly breaks them up before Nesta tears off someone's head.
~~~~~
Cassian pulled up at the townhouse he shared with his brothers. All the lights were turned off which meant that Az was sleeping, or not home. The former was more likely because Az usually got pizza on his rest nights and there were three cold slices of meat lovers pizza left. Cassian was so hungry, he ended up eating them cold. He fought back a moan at how delicious the pizza was. He would never understand how Nesta was able to be a vegetarian. Shit. He had been such a dick to Nesta earlier. She was genuinely concerned about him and he had just pushed her away.
Cassian pulled out his phone and checked instagram. Mor had posted a photo of her and Amren with their dog, Duchess, at a party. He didn’t know if he should laugh or cry at the fact that a misgendered dog had a better social life than he did.
~~~~~
“Ugh, Feyre, Tomas and his little gang showed up at work last night.” Nesta and Feyre were chilling in the kitchen, the latter making a breakfast spread that would put Disney Channel moms to shame. Amren and Mor were nursing killer hangovers, so Feyre made sure to bang around a ton in the kitchen.
“Again? A-fucking-gain? Nuthin new, nuthin changed? Same old shit. Same old fuckin shit.” Feyre replied, forgetting that Nesta had no idea what that reference meant.
“I told them to leave and that I almost had the money to pay them back, but Tomas just slapped my ass and said ‘sEe YoU oN yOuR nExT sHiFt’ then he got up and left.”
“You do realize that we could end all of this by just telling Rhys? I know you have this whole thing about your pride and shit, but we could tell Rhys and he could pay off all your debts to him.”
“Feyre, I appreciate it, but I need to fight my own battles. I got myself into this mess, so I sure as hell can get myself out of it. Plus, I don’t like the idea of feeling like I owe my current employer money.”
“Nesta, sweetie, I love you… BUT YOU NEED TO PUT YOUR DAMN PRIDE TO THE SIDE FOR LIKE, TWO SECONDS AND ACCEPT HELP!”
“FEYRE-”
“Okay, can we yell about Nesta's issues at some time other than 6am? Also, is that bacon I smell?” Mor walked in holding her head and wearing one of Nesta's sweatshirts with some leggings.
“Yes, fattie. And it’s like, 10:30.” Feyre slapped Mor's hand away from a stack of pancakes cooling on the countertop.
“And I do not have any issues, Mor. I’m not the one that went partying with a dog last night.”
“Nesta, that is exactly the reason why you have issues. If you went partying with Duchess, maybe you would loosen up a bit. God knows you need it.”
“Brat.” Nesta threw a piece of toast at Mor's head.
“Thanks! Hey, Feyre, pass the butter.” Feyre slid the butter across the counter and cursed loudly when it just slid on the floor at Mor's feet. Facedown.
“Really, Feyre?” Nesta said in an exasperated tone.
“I’m sorry! I thought she would catch it!”
“That was our last stick of butter, you absolute dingbat!” Nesta sighed and picked up the keys to her car.
“Where are you going?” Mor asked, ever the worried friend thinking she had caused a family feud.
“To the store. We need more milk and eggs anyways. Tell me if you guys are gonna go out while I’m gone.” Nesta walked out the door of their spacious apartment and made her way over to the elevator, pressing the ground level button. She stormed over to her car, got in, and slammed the door shut. On her way to the store, she noticed that one of the local book stores was having a sale. She tried to ignore the voice in her head telling her that she had piles of unread books in her room, and all over the other communal areas of the apartment. She would just pop in after picking up the groceries. No big deal. She could restrain herself. Maybe.
~~~~
Cassian woke up and made his way down the stairs towards the kitchen at 10am.
Hey sorry don’t be mad but here’s the shopping list. I had to go out.
~Azriel
“Unbelievable.” Cassian sighed and picked up the piece of paper attached to Azriel's little note and crumpled it up. Then he uncrumpled it because he remembered he needed to see what it said. Cassian walked up to his room and threw on a sweatshirt, some slip-on vans, and grabbed his keys. He couldn’t remember why they decided to share groceries. He wanted to in the beginning, but now that he woke up without any food in the house because his brothers had eaten all of it he was thinking or re-evaluating that decision. Cassian slid into his car and made his way to the store.
~~~~
When Nesta pulled up at the store she checked her phone and saw that Feyre had sent her a text while she was driving.
Feyby*: heyyyyyyyyy nes can you pleeeeeeeeeease get me some chocolate while you’re out :)?
Nestella*: k. anything else? im walking in now by the way
Feyby: nope! thank you love you! :)
Nestella: love you too
Nesta made her way towards the dairy aisle and picked up some 2% milk, a pack of four sticks of butter, and eggs. She quickly walked over to the candy aisle and began studying all her options, she took candy selecting very seriously.
“Nes?”
~~~~
Cassian walked into the store and quickly picked up all the stuff on the list. Once he got to the last few items written he realized he wanted ice-cream for a movie night with the boys. He walked over to the dairy aisle and picked up a tub of cookies n’ cream right when Nesta Archeron stormed past him towards the candy aisle. He followed her because, well, he wanted to talk to her. But he needed to act like he wasn't stalking her cause she might yell at him.
“Nes?”
“Mother Above, Cassian! You scared the shit out of me don’t you dare do that ever again!”
Oh well.
“How did you not hear me coming? Are you really that focused on chocolate?”
“I’m selecting some chocolate for Feyre, and she is very picky so I was focused on reading what the ingredients were in each bar.” She seemed to have recovered from the scare because she just grabbed a random chocolate bar and stormed past him.
“Obviously you don’t care that much if you’re willing to just grab a random bar and walk away!” Cassian yelled at Nesta. Some other shoppers began to stare at him so he quickly said “Don’t worry, we work together. I know her, I’m not some random creep haha.” That just got him more strange looks though so he just made his way towards self-checkout and paid for the items and skirted outta there.
~~~~
Nesta was so embarrassed while walking away from Cassian. People were staring at her! Ugh, Cassian needs to learn to not yell in public places. She walked over to her car after checking out and loaded her groceries into the boot. She needed a black iced coffee stat. Nesta began the quick drive to one of the local coffee shops and once she arrived she quickly sent the girls a text letting them know where she was.
Nestella: hey bitches im getting coffee you hoes want anything
Feyby: i want a mocha frappe pleeease
Tiny Ancient One*: just get me a black americano girl
Mor Boobiez Plz*: i wanna iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel
Nestella: okay for everyone except Mor cause wtf that's not even an item on the menu
Mor Boobiez Plz: it is i swear! just ask them for it they did it when i asked!
Nestella: fine
“What can I get for you?” The guy working the register asked in a very monotone voice.
“One black iced coffee, one black americano, one mocha frappe, and one iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel sauce.”
“We don’t do that last one-” Nesta gave him a withering glare and he immediately changed his mind on what he was about to say.
“Those will be ready soon ma’am. Can I get a name for the order?”
“Nesta. Thank you.” Nesta walked over to the opposite side of the counter to wait while their coffee was being prepared.
“That was quite impressive the way you scared him into doing what you wanted him to, Sweetheart.”
“Cassian! Are you stalking me? Go away.”
“I’m not stalking you, I’m just here to get some coffee.” He smirked at her and picked up a latte that was set down beside him. He took a sip and looked Nesta up and down before smirking and saying “Hot.” he winked at her and left before she could yell at him. If he was being honest the coffee was actually the perfect temperature, but he just loved getting under Nesta Archerons skin.
#nessian#acotar#Feysand#puppy#coffee#groceries#penthouse#townhouse#azriel#nesta archeron#archeron sisters#sister love#mor#amren#varian#feyre archeron#rhysand#cassian#duchess#just best friend things#random tag#ok im done now
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Miss Jacki’s Wincest World
Tonight I have Wincest on my mind... I usually do, but more tonight than normal so Id like to share with anyone interested, my thoughts and headcanons about it, and maybe those of you who read this, may view Sam and Dean’s relationship a little differently, or, at the very least, see there are many ways to enjoy Wincest, and maybe even inspire you, writers and artists, to create around this view. I know not all my followers dig Wincest, so I’ll put in a cut so as not to spam your feed with something that may squick you. Anyone who is interested, please feel free to comment, ask me stuff, or share your own view. So click the cut, and enter if you dare 😎
I want to start off by stating that Im not into m/m sex, and I definitely don’t have an incest kink, however, Sam and Dean have something very special that I noticed and loved immediately when I first started watching. The first time we see the brothers together, I was hit with “WOAAH easy tiger” Dean’s smile. a breathless Sam “Dean?!” and I knew, this was gonna be interesting! At first I was intrigued, but still a little put off with how thick the subtext was, with all the sexually charged pushing each other into walls, unnecessary touching and grabbing, and heart eyes they would look at each other with, I remember thinking “the writers know they're brothers.... right?”But it wasn't long before I found all this downright adorable. and though I didn’t think the brothers have sex, when Dean sold his soul for Sam, I knew they had an unmatchable love. Something that goes far beyond familial love to something none of us will ever experience.
I don’t know when it happened exactly, but by the end of season 4 I was thinking “If they had sex, would it even be the worst thing they’ve ever done?” Sam and Dean do immoral, unethical and illegal things all the time, but for good reasons, so, if they crossed that line into banging each other, it would be for a good reason. Like, they love each other more than words can express and need each other more than oxygen. So really, is it a reach to think it would become sexual at some point?
I know it won't ever be canon, and honestly, I don't want it to be, but it’s obviously something the writers have always wanted us to consider, a risque thought to entertain, and maybe even accept between the 2 of them. Jared and Jensen aren’t offended by the thought, they play into it at con panels and on gag reels. Sometimes the show jokes about it, and the cast and crew even play into it. It was great to learn I wasn’t alone in thinking Wincest is the best ship ever!
Now, my headcanons and preferences are different than many other Wincest shippers, and that’s fine, there's more than one way to love this pair. but I must say that it makes it difficult for me to find a fic that matches my opinion. It’s not your fault, it’s that I am a picky little shit, and though I accept and respect the views of others, for my own personal satisfaction, sex between the boys has to be a certain way, or it doesn't do much for me.
I know for many, if not most of you, like the idea of the boys being sexual since they were young. I am absolutely turned off by any underage sex... Sam and Dean or anyone else... and I am also turned off by them being an age that wasn't played by Jared and Jensen. All that aside, I do understand the romance of the thought of the boys, lusty and passionate for each other and tearing at each other in the Impala after a hunt, that's all good, but for me I like all that tension to build up all these years, through everything they've been through together, and how they've felt when they were apart.
I've never felt that the boys lust after each other. It's pure honest love. They see each other as beautiful and the center of their universe. The sun rises and sets just for each other. It’s not “Damn he has a hot ass” (for me anyway) I don't think either brother is bisexual. This would mean they have an interest in men as well as women, and neither has shown they have any interest in men at all, but they have a bond with each other, that even they don't fully understand. They just know they belong to, and with their brother, in every sense of the word. Even death doesn’t part them. In fact, Death tried to, and Dean killed him 😉
I see them as not being together romantically until recent years. In fact, the later their “first time” is in a fan fic, the better. The longer that tension builds over surviving Hell, dying over and over, fighting, reuniting, watching people they care about die, and a world they've saved half a dozen times, still crumbling before them, Finally, the boys have nothing left to fear and give themselves over to each other.
To get more personal, and maybe even a little smuttier. I dont see either as specifically a top or bottom ( hehe) I think they switch depending on the mood. I think Sam loves his role in Dean’s world. The little brother that Dean would sell his soul to protect. Dean wants to be sweet and gentle with Sam. Worship him inside and out. This works for me because if you have noticed, when Dean barks and bristles up to Sam, Sam rolls his eyes and pushes through it, but when Dean talks softly or expresses how important Sam is to him., Sam melts like cheese on a hot plate. Dean enjoys melting Sam 😊
Dean, however, loves that his little brother is big and strong and nerdy as he may be, is a lethal mofo if someone hurts or threatens Dean. When Sam makes love to Dean, he likes to be a little rough, playful,. not overly aggressive. He likes to take control and Dean gets all tingly when he does (that's literally canon folks hehe) If you've noticed, when Sam argues with Dean but is being the nerdy, logical peace-maker, Dean rolls his eyes and blows him off. However, when Sam expresses emotions, whether he’s angry or sad, Dean listens and softens up to him. Dean responds best when Sam is passionate and emotional.
Dean also likes to feel Sam’s size and strength. As protective as Dean is, sometimes he needs protection himself and loves that his nerdy little brother is a freakin tank who would let the world burn to protect him.
Sometimes, sex is just fun. Awkward and sloppy. Laughing because they're too big to do it comfortably in the car, or maybe they played a stupid drinking game or lost a sexy bet on a football game. They trust each other implicitly and experiment sometimes, and both are comfortable enough to say if they like it or not.
Wincest is just the best, isn't it? The show has done well at painting them as a married couple. Nowadays, Dean hasnt even shown much interest in finding a chick and getting laid, and Sam has had sex once in 6 years! They may never admit on screen that the boys have sex, but they’ve made it obvious that they dont need or want other people for anything anymore. 💕😍
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mnet global auditions callback ( the interview )
called out ; @rkkhg @rksuwoong @danielxrk @joohyunrk
as the performances come to an end and the judges start their evaluation of everyone, yugyeom notices that people around him are being tugged out of the room. he didnt pay much attention to it though until hyunggu was the one who was being called out, and the not long after yugyeom was being called.
ah interviews. he thinks as he’s guided to sit down in a setting that kind of similar to that of the initial audition. he figured something like this would happen. most survival shows tend to have a talk part where the contestants talk about what had been happening or how theyre feeling. these are the times when things tend to get edited and it’s when he knows he has to be careful to not say anything that could get edited badly. or that could be misinterpreted in a way he doesn’t want them to be interpreted.
he knows this from watching the previous shows as well hearing about it from last seasons.
that is to say that yugyeom has never been and probably will never be good at watching his own words. he hasn’t ever really cared--even at work he tends to be bad at it but luckily he hasn’t been in a situation where his words got him in trouble. there’s been a few close calls at work but the chicken shop ahjummas all love him to much to ever be really mad at him. he did get shoes chucked at him once but well... he probably deserved that one. he wished it hadn’t happened when he was working with dongmin. the ahjummas always do everything they can to ruin his image with the older male. how can he properly take care of dongmin if the other sees him getting beat by flying slippers.
he shakes his head at the thought.
he’s able to touch up his make up and hair before the interview starts which he’s thankful for. his lip tint having faded a bit since the beginning and he wanted to be a bit less shiny. though he only did one dance, he had sweated enough to make his face feel shiny. but that was taken care of.
then he’s sat and settled, legs crossed knee over the other, and sitting as straight as he can without appearing stiff. a casual position that still looks like he isn’t slouching.
"are we recording?” he asks, glancing from the camera to the interviewer who nods at him. and he blinks at the camera again before winking at it.
how did you feel when you received the callback?
the first question isn’t a surprising one, in fact he expected this. and he has an idea of what the other questions are going to be as well. his smirks though. “would it be cocky of me to say i expected it?” he asks in return, and maybe hyunggus dumb thing of always answering questions with questions has rubbed off on him. his tone comes off as kind of joking, but he seems serious at the same time. “i guess not expected so much as i hoped? i mean, i went in with all my effort and not to seem even more cocky but i know im a good dancer.” see, this is why he knew having the knowledge of watching his words would not be helpful.
yugyeom just doesn't care about watching his words. he doesn’t care about sugar coating his thoughts. it’s better to just be honest, right?
how was it seeing the set the first time?
another question he expected, and boring one at that. though he keeps that thought to himself. “ah, it was really amazing to see! i thought wow this is an important place. and really wanted to be on the stage to do well.” he nods, still speaking honestly even if he didn’t care much for this question. and he supposes that it showed as he didn’t spend very long talking on it as he had the first one.
before they can move on though something comes to mind that makes him laugh. “actually, i didn’t really get to view it all at first. see, i came with my best friend kang hyunggu, and of course were going to sit together since we were allowed to choose. so we decided on the right side.” he laughs, raising a hand to pat his bangs in a small show of embarrassment. “but i don’t know why... but i ended up going to the left side and realize oh no i can’t find ggu. he was supposed to be here. i thought he might have not come which was ridiculous and all. thats when i spotted him across the way and realized i was on the wrong side.”
a soft sigh leaves him, he looks very resigned with himself. “so i did the first thing that comes to mind and just boooked it full speed across the stage to his side. he didn’t say anything then but i now he won’t let me live it down.”
this time he turns to the camera and points. “yah, hyunggu yah, don’t even think of teasing me for this, okay?”
what did you think when the judges were revealed?
“i kind of expected something like that.” he responded, nodding as he did. “they were judges for last season too and this show is all about them finding new trainees and potential idols right? isn’t it better for them to be here to see the talent themselves? i didn’t think they would be there for the first episode but it’s really cool. it kind of shows how serious they are about finding people.” he hums, pausing his answer and picking absentmindedly at one of the rips in his jeans as he does. seeming to be thinking over his answer.
after a few seconds he raises his head back up and smiles. “makes me more excited to do well on the stage, like extra pressure and all but much more fun.” he nods again, agreeing with himself.
how do you think you did?
his eye brows raised at the question, having expected them to get to these kinds of questions eventually and he finds himself leaning back a little. it’s hard to not smirk. to not let that overly confident energy bleed out because yugyeom has always been confident. he’s always been cocky and even though his personality has tamed a bit in the last year he’s still yugyeom. still the same guy who walks into a room and thinks himself the best.
even sometimes when he’s with hyunggu who he acknowledges as a better dancer.
“me?” he starts, tongue peeking out to wet his bottom lip before he shrugs. but the modest, nonchalant act is not something he’s good at. it’s not who he is. and there was really no reason for him to pretend any other way. so he decides to be true to himself.
“i think--no, i know i did great.” he speaks with the confidence of someone who has the skills to back up his words. or that he at least believes he has the skills. “i can’t recall any big mistakes, or even any small ones. the dance was new to me, and it’s one i put together on my own, but i still felt comfortable with it. it was odd at first. normally i choreograph with hyunggu. he helps me out often enough, but this time we didn’t even talk about out performances.” he pauses, head tilting and eyes going up for a moment.
“but i think the dance came out well. i felt good on stage. felt like i belonged. honestly, i didn’t want to step off the stage.”
were there any performances you liked?
“kang hyunggus.” he answers without a second of hesitation, and then he ends up chuckling due to how fast he had answered. though it comes to no surprise to him that he did as he has always liked what hyunggu does when performing. even back when they only vaguely knew each other in the busking circles he had been a mild fan.
“he always brings so much to the stage. his energy and presence even when just dancing is so on another level. it makes people want to watch, draws them in.” he smiles. “thats how i feel at least. every time i watch him dance i always want to see more. i always feel so eager to see what hes going to do and it’s always so much fun to watch him.” his words are filled with so much sincerity, its’ very clear he holds a lot of affection for his friend. as well as admiration. if asked he would admit to looking up to hyunggu. “i mentioned earlier that we always choregraph together, and theres a reason i always turn to him for help with these things.”
“he owned that stage-- knew he would--and i almost wish i could have seen him perform longer.”
he takes a moment to think, tapping his finger to his chin before grinning. “i also really liked joohyun’s performance. i think she really showed her stuff. someone to keep an eye on for sure.”
were there any performances you didn’t like?
“also kang hyunggu.” again his words make him laugh, bit this time its more of a chuckle as he smirks. “see, while i really admire him for his skills i also acknowledge that he’s competition. this show is a competition, after all, right? he’s good. amazing even, and i’d be an idiot to not think of him as someone to watch out for.”
“also suwoongs performance.” this time he crinkles his nose. the two of them are friends, and yugyeom enjoys taking any chance he can to mess with the other male. so why not here and now. “i’ve never liked trot--though i admit he did a good job with it. im still just like why trot of all things.” he chuckles. “sorry su, but maybe try something cooler next time.”
what did you think of kang daniel’s performance? we noticed you spoke very briefly with him at the beginning.
“kang... daniel...” he says the name slowly, not because he doesn’t recognize it but because he does. and it makes him tense ever so slightly because of the history he has with said male. a history he really hopes doesn’t come to light should he make it onto the show farther than one episode. he knows his old drinking habits could come bite him in the ass.. but he really prays they don’t.
“i think...he’s got talent.” he continues in the same slower pace. as if weighing each word and being more careful with it than he had been before. “i remember seeing him on the last season but since he’s not signed now it goes to show he didn’t have the right stuff then. but well, it’s been almost a year since last season so who knows what kind of changes he’s gone through.”
“his performance was good--i think he kind of lacks in stage presence still. i thought that last season when watching. but i could be picky.” he shrugs, and the way he talks doesn’t give away if he likes or dislikes the other male. “anyway, i think he’s someone to watch out for if he makes it past this episode.” he decides to leave it at that, not wanting to say more.
is there anyone you are certain will move onto the next stage?
“i go back to my first question of would it be too cocky to say myself?” he smirks wider, sendin g a wink and a finger gun at the camera. that ever flirty, yet cocky attitude really making an appearance. and he knows it might not be painted well for him to be cocky like this as people tend to like modesty but well. someones gotta talk him up and who better than himself.
he’s here to get noticed one way or another.
“i feel pretty safe.” he says a bit more calmly this time, letting himself relax. “i danced with energy and with confidence. i was comfortable on that stage and i think i was really able to show my stuff for the judges. even if i’m not the best dancer, i’m confident in the fact i was able to show a good stage presence. that’s important for idols right? a good performance is also about the energy as well as the skill, yeah?”
“i feel comfortable in my ability for both.”
so yeah, maybe he’s going the cocky path for this. but well, he wouldn’t be kim yugyeom is he didn’t sound cocky as fuck.
“i guess if im confident in myself then i should also be confident in hyunggu. im not scared to admit he’s more talented--or well, more trained than i am. if i’m moving on then he has to be moving on as well.”
anyone you think won’t be moving onto the next stage?
“there were a handful of performances that i felt were lacking--people who maybe had the skills but didn’t match it with stage presence. or those who just lacked in both.” he hums, tapping his knee before shrugging. “i’ll admit, i didn’t pay to close attention to anyone i didn’t know, especially if their performance wasn’t good. so at this point i don’t really have any names. i kind of didn’t notice names--i knew my friends and i took note of those who caught my eye but other wise i didn’t care as much.”
“so i guess just best of luck to everyone.” he gives the camera a smile, a small show of the caring leader he has inside that keeps his stupid busking team alive, and looks after his friends who have begin calling him the mom friend. that cocky aura driiting away for the briefest of moments. “it takes guts no matter how good you are to stand on a stage like this and perform. i think every one who came today deserves a bit of merit for even coming. it’s intense, you know?”
“but, well.” and the kindness fades back into that same cockiness he had displayed through the whole interview. “those who know what they’re doing will be the ones moving on, yeah?” he smirks again, really seeming to just bleed confidence right now. “if you don’t have what it takes you won’t move on. the more the cut the less competition to worry about.”
“not that i’m worried.”
#txt; solo#rkkhg#rkmga5#rkmga5callback#rkmga5interview#THESE GIFS ARE SO CUTE#rkdongmin#rksuwoong#final wc; 2429#kill me#danielxrk#joohyunrk
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ASKS 08
rip it’s a lot of stuff, some good, some weird….
Anonymous said: do you like eating ass? I bet your booty is thicc and juicy :)
idk who would even send this but ummm I’m a bottom so yeah.. that answers that wedhfnsh have u nice day/night <3
@thesimpley2k said: your cc is so beautiful! and you’re a britney stan :) ily sis
thank youuuuu omg ily2 lmao I don’t voice my Britney stanness much but once B10 starts getting more hyped up I’ll be back up there! Thank you again and rip original make me MV
Anonymous said: Oof I need all of your wip hairs right now
oof you haven’t even seen half of them sweetie ;) I have 10 wip hairs as of now so like… you’ve seen 4 on this blog through edits/playlists. the rest are on my patreon and some go on my wips section in my discord (omg shameless plug im sorry but its true)
Anonymous said: Can we gift you packs through origin?
if u want?? idrk how that works tbh ;-; if u did tho like rsdfgfbvc thank you!!! I prob will only buy packs that I can use for cc from now on tbh ;-; my computer is at that point where i need to be really picky about stuff, plus imo they arent worth it wedfgdbfn i regret buying most of the SP’s
Anonymous said: Are you posting a shorter version of the Zoey Hair as shown in your latest post because it looks amazing?!!!!!
thank you!!! That is basically what the idea of it is lmao, but I think im gonna make an accessory hair clip for it too. Not 100% sure yet tho
@agentwashsims said: Crying over the wip hair and the grimes reference! Okay you’re still perfect and ily that it all okay bye.
aaah thank you! grimes is so good omg Art Angels is my favorite album but there are a lot of ongs on Visions I like as well. I like a little bit of Halfaxa toooooo
Anonymous said: Hi, would it be possible for you to just reupload the lydia hair post? As it’s marked as sensitive content, I can’t see the picture and I’d really like to be able to have a look at it before I download it.
Hi! I emailed tumblr support about it since it has been over a month since it has been up for review. Hopefully they get it worked out soon <3 there is a picture of it on my download page if you want to look at it there
Anonymous said: Hey, how do I do Patreon? I want to but i’m new to all those things of Patreon cause now I want lots of hairs that need it, and I wanna learn how can I Patreon you!
Hello! Hopefully you see this haha. Patreon is sort of like Netlfix in it is a monthly charge for goods. To get 3 cc hairs early each month, it is a $1 pledge. Higher pledges get better rewards(such as watching me work on cc, getting to vote on hair releases, and more). I think that Patreon is a great way to help support creators as long as they do it right (no exclusive CC). I really hope this helps you and thank you so much if you decide to pledge any ammount <3
Anonymous said: When are going to upload your maxis match hairlines? Like in a post
oml I am horrible lmao I deleted them and don’t seem to have them backed up, but I will maybe make more in the future?? I honestly don’t find them that usable on most hairs but everybody is different so we will see <3
Anonymous said: Is the black braided hair on your April Playlist a WIP? If not WCIF it cuz it’s gorgeous <333 Ily.
issa wip for Juneee
Anonymous said: how old are you?
18 d2f m4m
Anonymous said: What is your Origin ID?
spotharris
Anonymous said: Hey! I 🖤 ur content btw and I wanted to just like clarify something. Ur posts say u can recollect but don’t include the mesh. What does that mean exactly??? Do people still need the mesh for the recollections to show up in game?? Sorry if this is really dumb, I’m a new simblr. Thx!
hey!! sorry for the super late reply omg, welcome to simblr!! it is kinda crazy here but hopefully u can find ur peeps and make a nice home :) anywaysssss i think u mean recoloring, which is like when people add different colors other than the 18 EA base colors. I don’t allow people to use the meshes mainly bc I know that sometimes I have to go back and update things and this way the recolors don’t have a broken mesh and require that person to redo their package.
Anonymous said: whose ur fave member of lOoNa
my rankings as of right now: Kim Lip, Go Won, Olivia Hye, JinSoul, HyunJin, Chuu, HeeJin, Choerry, HeeJin, HaSeul, ViVi, and then YeoJin
also omfg if u have jinsoul/kim lip/choerry limited edition mix&match photocard and would like to gift me it then umm PLEASE they are impossible to find and i need for my collection ;-;
@disneynsims said: I am also a massive Britney Spears fan, and I have to say I appreciate you naming your hairs after her songs. I do make one small request, that a hair eventually be named after one of her best bonus tracks, “Up n’ Down”.
omg Up N’ Down is one of my least favorites on femme fatale grfbg but thank you!! I don’t really name hairs after her songs anymore :(
@issharky said: you’ve improved so much over the time! ive been following (on tsr and tumblr since i joined) since like 2016! ♥ still love your blog!
ygvhbjn i didnt have a tsr but go awf lmao thank you!!! i was a mess in 2016 and a lil of 2017 <3
Anonymous said: Ur such a babe austin
thx for sending this @dogsill ur a babe too 😘
Anonymous said: Discord? Patreon? And this are how a good simblr die
oof discord is literally like a groupchat thing but go off also patreon makes it so i release 3 hairs a month when before it was like 1 or 2 so ummm
Anonymous said: I have recently downloaded blender to make cc hairs, but I can’t zoom in, rotate, or do anything basically. Do you know of any tutorials that explain how to use it well/ in detail? (I have a windows laptop). Anyway, I recently discovered your hairs and I am in love!! Thank you for making so many beautiful pieces of cc!
urgg i really wish i could make video tutorials and stuff for blender and hairs :( I have tried about 3 or 4 times to record/stream and it is so laggy and just pure shit on stream and twitch. I kind of just learned stuff as i went in blender but a must have is a mouse of some kind, otherwise it is 10x harder
@alexschmidt629 said: Hey! I hope you’re doing a bit better than the last time you made your last post! I’m sorry to hear about all of that, being a senior is so difficult and college stuff is even more difficult. I hope you’re doing better!
thank you! I’m doing a bit better now :)
Anonymous said: holy shit it sounds like everything that literally could’ve gone wrong did. wishing u love and luck bb. and also i think its absolutely FINE that u put ur stuff up on patreon early, it’s still free in the end!! its just a choice to actually compensate cc creators for all that they do for us. god that person was just so rude and im kinda surprised at how kindly you took it. props to u xx
yeah dsgf everything kinda went shitty the past few months but hopefully it all turns itself around :) and I try not to pick at any rude anons/asks in general bc I feel like by doing that it just causes more attention on the issue and more people/trolls want to jump on the band wagon. Thank you!!
Anonymous said: Oh honey, you need prayers and I wish you the best of luck with fasts, college, moving, and the rest of your life. Stay strong hon you got this!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
thank you <3
Anonymous said: hi is there a version off the Ella hair that has a bun in the back or am I crazy? probs crazy honestly, but thx for answering
I think you are thinking of my Maja hair? It has a different bottom but it has those same bangs! It is here
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idk if you are still doing this, but im evil so for the ask thing: 1-65
UGH SOMEONE ALWAYS DOES THIS whatevs nonny ty for the ask also i did some of these already but imma just do em again cuz im basically a new person than yesterday. under the cuttt
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? i honestly have no idea what this means so.. no?
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? unreasonably.
3. The person you would never want to meet? hitler
4. What is your favorite word? *moist*
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? the one rotting from the inside out
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? “wow look im wearing boots with heels 2day im so tall”
7. What shirt are you wearing? a plain black t shirt
8. What do you label yourself as? an annoying female
9. Bright room or dark room? dark but i want a pastel one
10. What were you doing at midnight last night? trying to sleep and failing
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? i rlly enjoyed being 6 actually
12. Who told you they loved you last? probably my mom lmao
13. Your worst enemy? hitler
14. What is your current desktop picture? the one that comes with the laptop lolol
15. Do you like someone? i mean i like people (some of them) but i dont have a crush on anyone fjekomd
16. The last song you listened to? sippy cup by melanie martinez
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? nobody id rather push them off a cliff
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? umm the kid that calls me fat at recess lolol
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? hmm my brother and i would basically just make him bring me chickfila
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) hmm i like my hair its really long and
t h i c c
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? umm i would just look like myself with short hair and less chubby cheeks lol
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? i took hula dance class for 4 years
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? burning to death
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. okay i would have a sub with ham+lettuce+extraextraextra pickles+ pepper + oil + vinegar and thats it lol im v picky
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? parenthood pack and dine out pack
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? England!
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? apple juice plz
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? everyone is equal is society BUT there are representatives so like people dont have to vote for everything
29. What is your favorite expletive? bitch
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? laptop man
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? idk man i dont wanna erase any of my memories bcuz thats what builds me as a person.
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! England!
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? My grandfather but only if he wasn’t sick anymore because I never got to know him even though he was around until i was 10.
34. What was your last dream about? i was in a quidditch game.
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]? simblr? cuz no lmao
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? yes once but i also went to urgent care when i broke my arm so idk if that counts
37. Have you ever built a snowman? no
38. What is the color of your socks? not wearing any
39. What type of music do you like? pop/alternative like melanie martinez
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? sunsets because it gets cooler
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? oreo mint
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) um green bay packers cuz thats what my family likes but i dont like sports..
43. Do you have any scars? nah
44. What do you want to be when you graduate? photographer but that aint happening so lawyer..?
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? i push people away because i cant talk about my feelings to them
46. Are you reliable? what like, a secret because yesssss but if it means not being late to something then lol no
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? whats ur follower count? LOL IM JUST KIDDING DONT COME FOR ME
48. Do you hold grudges? yes literally all the time
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? a cat-corgi
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? one time i spent a solid ten minutes debating with my step sister about whether or not my dog was a good boi
THE ANSWERS YES
51. Are you a good liar? no (or maybe thats a good lie????????????? the real answers yes lol)
52. How long could you go without talking? approximately 2 seconds
53. What has been you worst haircut/style? i had bangs when i was little
54. Have you ever baked your own cake? nope
55. Can you do any accents other than your own? nope
56. What do you like on your toast? dont like toast
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? my teachers making us draw a poppy :(
58. What would be you dream car? a hybrid
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. LMAO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME FOR THAT I HAVE 50 POUNDS OF HAIR
60. Do you believe in aliens? sometimes my step dad says he was abducted when he was 11
61. Do you often read your horoscope? nope
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? omega
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? dragons OBVI (mostly cuz harry potter)
64. What do you think about babies? adorable
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of. THE ANON DIDNT ASK SO ILL TELL A STORY:
one time i fell out of a shopping cart and broke my arm
the end
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