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lotr-sesa · 4 months

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Lord of the Rings Secret Santa 2023 Masterlist!

To date, we have FORTY stories and two pieces of fanart. The mods would like to thank all the writers and the pinch hitters, and also extend a special heartfelt thanks to those who filled prompts without signing up with prompts of their own. Thank you! ❤️

All the links in the masterlist go directly to the work on AO3. Go, read and enjoy, and please don't forget to leave kudos! And if you received something, please thank your writer or artist!

A long Journey Home by Plant_Murderer for octopus_fool

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationships: Éomer & Théodred, Éowyn & Théodred, Théoden & Théodred, Thèodred/OC

Characters: Théodred, Gríma, Théoden

Summary: Thèodred, now older and called Aldred, thinks back on the events that led him to be mocked and scorned in the home of his birth as he rides through night to get home.

A star docks at Balar by Kirta for Plant_Murderer

Rating: General Audiences

Relationships: Elrond & Elros & Elwing, Eärendil/Elwing

Characters: Elwing, Elrond, Elros, Eärendil

Summary: Vingilot docks at the Isle of Balar near the end of the War of Wrath, brilliant with light and the gleaming of crystal dust undimmed by the scars of battle. (in which Elwing is fully prepared to carry on the family tradition of rules-lawyering)

Aftermath by ingenious_spark for silvergreyleaf

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Characters: Maedhros, Eluréd, Elurín

Summary: Maedhros searches for Eluréd and Elurín in the aftermath of the Sack of Doriath. He cannot allow Celegorm's last act to be this tragedy.

All day I had the feeling a miracle would happen... by I_did_not_mean_to for cilil

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationships: Irmo & Námo & Nienna, Námo/Vairë

Characters: Irmo, Námo, Nienna, Vairë

Summary : Right after the beginning of everything, it soon turns out that "everything" is not quite...what it was promised to be. Námo, Nienna, and Vairë struggle with their purpose on account of a certain lack. For once, Eru actually intervenes positively. Enter Irmo, stage right... Welcome to my reimagining of canon. No warnings--it's all very tame!

And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? by I_did_not_mean_to for Melkor (Melkors_big_Tits)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con

Relationships: Manwë & Morgoth, Manwë/Morgoth, Morgoth/Oromë, Morgoth/Tulkas

Characters: Morgoth, Manwë, Oromë, Tulkas

Summary: This is Melkor, Cílil, and my little person. Please heed the tags and take care of yourselves-this is your official warning not to proceed without asking yourself long and hard whether you really want to do that.

Anoint My Love, Under the Sky by Maironite (noxeos) for Anonymous

Rating: Mature

Relationship: Arien/Eönwë

Characters: Arien, Eönwë

Summary: Telling her that he worries for her, that he craves her full attention is selfish - not in his nature. Eönwë is there to guide them, to protect them, to fight for them. He is his Order firstmost, and his own person secpond. Manwë's Herald has no time for matters of the heart, no right to claim a specific person. And yet-

Athelas by nyctophilic0vitnir for atamascolily

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Category: Gen

Characters: Éowyn, Aragorn, Théoden, Éomer, Daisy Baggins, Celandine Brandybuck, Elendil, Isildur, Eärien

At the Mirrormere by Caiti (Caitriona_3) for Jarakrisafis

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Aulë/Yavanna

Characters: Aulë, Durin, Yavanna

Summary: Family is found and created in many ways, and a son will always seek to match the example, the legacy of his father.

Basic Instinct by BaccaratBlack for Anonymous

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Eönwë/Gil-galad

Characters: Gil-galad, Eönwë

Summary: During the War of Wrath, Gil-galad seeks comfort where he can find it. He?s simply not prepared for the peculiarities of his Maia comrade.

Berry cakes and elfling plagues by GoschateWabn for Lost_inMiddleearth (between_thepages)

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Erestor/Glorfindel

Characters: Glorfindel, Erestor, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond

Summary: The (failed) attempts of lord Glorfindel of the golden flower to propose to head councillor Erestor.

Budding Romance by ingenious_spark for Lost_inMiddleearth (between_thepages)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationships: Elrond/Gil-galad, Celebrían/Elrond, Celebrían/Elrond/Gil-galad

Characters: Elrond, Gil-galad, Celebrían

Comparative Studies On Eldarin Cultures Across Aman and Middle-Earth by maironite (noxeos) for sallysavestheday (illustrated fic)

Rating: General Audiences

Characters: Silvan Elves, Avari Characters, Laiquendi Characters, Noldor, Sindar, Vanyar, Falmari

Summary: An artistic rendition on the various different ethnicity amongst Elves

Dawn Comes For All Of Us by maironite (noxeos) for Anonymous

Rating: Mature

Relationship: Fingon/Maedhros

Characters: Maedhros, Fingon, Sons of Fëanor, Fëanor, Nerdanel

Summary: And would have Maedhros ever imagined to get such life, a life he still felt that deep down he did not deserve. But loving someone wasn't only about whether or not you felt you deserved it, it meant becoming the best version you could for them and Fingon, his sweet loving Fingon had awaited ages for his return. For Maedhros to put back together a sense of identity not tied to the cursed stones, not tied to a bloody oath, not tied to a doomed legacy. Until he could stand on his own two feet and accept love in his life once more without the broken shards of a looming tragedy awaiting in every shadow. It's the Winter Solstice in Aman. and Maedhros' family is here.

Excerpt from Flora and Fauna of the Third Age, Volume 1: Flora by Galadriel for atamascolily

Rating: General Audiences

Characters: Alphros, Original Characters

Summary: A page taken from celebrated non-fiction author Barahir Elfwine IV's botanical guide, Flora and Fauna of the Third Age, Volume 1: Flora. This exclusive excerpt concerns the habitat and history of the mysterious simbelmynë.

Finding Our Way by Melusine6619 for likethenight

Rating: Not Rated

Relationship: Imrahil/Legolas

Characters: Legolas, Imrahil

Summary: After getting to know each other, Legolas and Imrahil confess their feelings and take a first step together.

Forged by Jarakrisafis for Tathrin

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: character death

Relationships: Celebrimbor/Narvi, Celebrimbor & Sauron

Characters: Celebrimbor, Narvi, Sauron

Summary: In the ashes, what is left?

Geriatric Gas Giant by I_did_not_mean_to for cilil

Rating: Mature

Relationships: Eönwë/Gothmog, Eönwë & Manwë, Eönwë & Finarfin

Characters: Eönwë, Gothmog, Manwë, Finarfin

Summary: Yes, that was a weak pun-ny title...sue me! Here we go, friend, I am a woman of my word. Firebird à la sauce Twilight... I am afraid I'll end up insulting and offending everyone, but that's a risk I've got to take :D

Haladriel Fill by nyctophilic0vitnir for Anonymous

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Galadriel /Halbrand

Characters: Galadriel, Halbrand, Sauron, Finrod, Felagund, Celeborn

I Do Wander Everywhere by Empy for facethestrange

Rating: General Audiences

Character: Elanor "Nori" Brandyfoot

Lanternlight by Empy for Anonymous

Rating: Mature

Relationship: Bard/Thranduil

Characters: Bard, Thranduil

Summary: Thranduil pays a late visit to Dale at Yule and Bard receives more than one gift.

Letters from the eve of despair by octopus_fool for Kirta

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Category: Gen

Characters: Fíriel of Gondor, Faramir (son of Ondoher), Artamir

Summary: On the evening before riding to battle, Faramir and Artamir write each other and their sister Fíriel letters in the knowledge that they might not see each other again.

Life just over there by oakenting for Anonymous

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Elwing/Maedhros

Characters: Elwing, Maedhros

Summary: Sometimes you just have to break out of the life you live and do something stupid. Elwing goes to meet Maedhros, and they connect.

Limit Testing by cilil for Melkors_big_Tits

Rating: Explicit

Relationships: Morgoth/Sauron, Gothmog/Morgoth

Characters: Morgoth, Sauron, Gothmog

Summary: Melkor suggests an experiment - testing the limits of physical pleasure. His two favourite servants are more than excited to participate and fulfill their lord's wishes.

Middle-Earth's Greatest Tourist Trap by octopus_fool for Adsters

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Characters: Hobbit Characters, Sauron, Original Baggins Character(s)

Midwinter by Lost_inMiddleearth (between_thepages) for sallysavestheday

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Éomer/Lothíriel

Characters: Lothíriel, Éomer

Summary: It is Midwinter in Rohan, and Lothíriel, recently wed to the King, joins the celebrations for the first time.

Mission Impossible: Dragonhoard by GoschateWabn for octopus_fool (fanart)

Rating: General Audiences

Character: Ravens of Erebor

Summary: In which the ravens of Erebor would like their share of the treasure, thank you very much.

Ode to a Nightingale by ohboromir for Anonymous

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Aragorn/Arwen

Characters: Aragorn, Arwen

Summary: An unkempt stranger pays a visit to the Elven-Queen of Gondor. Neither of them are disappointed.

Old friends by silvergreyleaf for Anonymous

Rating: General Audiences

Relationships: Celebrimbor & Narvi, Annatar/Celebrimbor

Characters: Narvi, Celebrimbor, Annatar

Summary: Narvi has died of old age and learns of the fate of Ost-In-Edhil in the halls of Mandos. Enraged, he seeks out his old friend. A conversation ensues.

Out Of Love Cometh by chiliadicorum for Anonymous

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Irmo & Námo

Characters: Irmo, Námo, one sleeping Elf

Summary: The Valar have decided to invite the Elves at Cuiviénen to move themselves to Aman, but Námo didnt say a word during their entire council. Irmo seeks him out afterwards to find out why.

Parure by Empy for Anonymous

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Gimli/Legolas

Characters: Gimli, Legolas

Summary: A series of vignettes. Legolas does his best to court Gimli properly.

Perfect Moments by Lillithsea for Anonymous

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Maglor/Turgon

Characters: Turgon, Maglor

Summary: Turgon falls in love with his cousin, almost without realizing it.

Sharing is caring by I_did_not_mean_to for Anonymous

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Caranthir/Haleth/Caranthir's Wife

Characters: Caranthir's Wife, Caranthir, Haleth

Summary: Here is my tiny take on Haleth/Caranthir/Caranthir's wife.

Songbird by facethestrange for oakenting (Fanart)

Rating: General Audiences

Character: Disa

Summary: Sometimes Disa likes to go outside to sing and make some winged friends in the process.

Spinning by I_did_not_mean_to for BaccaratBlack

Rating: Mature

Relationships: Curufin/TurgonCaranthir/Turgon

Characters: Curufin, Turgon, Maedhros, Fingon, Celegorm, Caranthir

Summary: Here is my take on your beloved having a little bit of fun! I love you dearly, and I hope you'll like this :D

The Edge of Flames by BaccaratBlack for Anonymous

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Elwing/Maedhros

Characters: Elwing , Maedhros

Summary: After ages together as unlikely companions on Elwings lonely isle, she has her ways of both comforting and haunting Maedhros.

The Egg is the World by cilil for GoschateWabn

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Eönwë /Gothmog

Characters: Gothmog, Eönwë, Sauron, Morgoth (Mentioned), Manwë (mentioned)

Summary: When Gothmog's attempt at helping with brooding and hatching their precious egg ends with Melkor and Mairon discovering and seizing it for their own collection, Eönwë fearlessly marches on Angband alone to retrieve it - by any means necessary.

The hands of a healer by GoschateWabn for Plant_Murderer

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Arondir/Bronwyn

Characters: Bronwyn, Arondir, Theo, Aragorn, Sam

Summary: The moment Bronwyn touches the cursed swordhilt, she and Arondir are whisked away to the battle at Weathertop, where another cursed blade has just done it's damage.

The quest for a book by GoschateWabn for Anonymous

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Ori /Original Female Character(s)

Characters: Ori, Original Female Character(s)

Summary: In which Ori makes a friend at the library.

These Our Braided Lives by sallysavestheday for Anonymous

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Gimli/Legolas

Characters: Gimli, Legolas, Thranduil, Thranduil's Wife

Summary: Legolas and Gimli among the Elves. The challenges and delights of marrying into the Greenwood, in a chain of drabbles.

This is Our Place by tehhumi for Anonymous

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationship: Fingolfin/Maglor

Characters: Fingolfin, Maglor

Summary: Two regent-kings glare at each other from opposite sides of the lake. There's nothing more to it, just cold calculated politics. (That's a complete lie)

When the Hurly-Burly's Done by sallysavestheday for Kirta

Rating: General Audiences

Relationship: Elrond & Gil-galad & Celebrimbor

Characters: Elrond, Gil-galad, Celebrimbor

Summary: Elrond and Gil-galad and Celebrimbor picnic on the edge of the world.

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antimony-medusa · 27 days

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How To Set Up An Ao3 Exchange

One of the first things I say whenever anyone asks me about running exchanges is that if you have more than about 30 people in the exchange, do NOT try to match it by hand. That is so much work and takes so much time. Use Ao3's matching algorithm. And people say sure, and then they look at how Ao3 works and they go uhhhhhhhhhh I think we can make a google form work. Because google forms are reasonably intuitive to make work, and Ao3 exchanges are— not.

But the thing is, once you understand the underlying logic for Ao3 collections, they are not that bad, and seriously I can't overstate the benefit of having Ao3 do the matching for you. That's like the difference between 80 hours of curating data as it comes in and then matching it (what happened with hand-matching 325 people for holiday exchange), or 2 hours of double-checking the matching (what happened with matching 125 people for 48 hour exchange). You have to put in extra work to get an Ao3 exchange set up, but it super pays off in the end. So! Here is an intro to how Ao3 exchanges work on the back end. This explanation assumes you know how to sign up for an exchange because I've posted ones like that before, for example, here.

Let's get into it.

THE COLLECTION

The first thing you want to do is set up your exchange collection. If you go to your right-hand drop-down menu, you click on My Collections.

That brings you to every collection you have ever made, and you go to to the right and click "New collection".

That brings you into the back end of the collection. You want to go down and put in a name for the collection that will be the url (so no spaces), a display name, an email for the collection to email when something happens to the collection (this will be public, so use a fandom email), and a basic description.

There's places there to do custom icons and headers, but those are optional, but you can go in and make your exchange pretty later if you want!

We are still in the "setting up" stage of the exchange, so once we go to preferences, you want to select all the tick boxes and make it look like this.

Moderated means that you'll have to manually approve things to be added to the collection (not absolutely necessary but can keep out trolls, and it also means that you can manually check that gifts meet minimums before you let them in to the exchange), Closed means that no one can submit things to the collection yet (once you open your exchange you de-select this), Unrevealed means that any works in the collection will show up as "mystery works" and not be readable (so you keep it unrevealed until the posting date, so people can post early but not spoil the surprise), anonymous means that all authors will be anonymous (this depends on if you have an anonymous portion of your exchange, so it's optional), "show random works" just means that you get a selection of different works when people visit the collection at different times, "send a message to the collection email" is optional but is useful for moderation (like if you're checking people off a list when their gifts get delivered), and "type of challenge" you want to be set to "gift exchange".

and then on this page the only other things of concern are places where you can put in an FAQ, a description and some instructions, but those are all optional! I normally host the FAQ on tumblr, so I just say "go check the tumblr at [link]".

And then you hit the submit button.

Now we get into the nitty-gritty.

First up is some optional stuff— you can add in the times that you're going to do things! This is useful for communication, but not necessary. We're still setting everything up, so you do not want Sign-Ups to be open, that is only selected once you have everything ready to go.

Then scrolling down, you get to Requests and Offers.

This is where you specify the absolute minimum ships or characters that you want people to give you to sign up. 10 is the maximum Ao3 allows, so I always set it to 10 for both "allowed", which is the maximum the site will allow. And required is the low number. I usually set it to a minimum of three, to make sure someone doesn't sign up with "i will only write one ship" or something. This way, people will have to do a minimum of three separate requests and offers.

The "requests visible" is part of the back end thing, and it's up to you if you want to select it or not. If you keep it unselected, the only person who will be able to see requests is the mods, and eventually each person will see their assignment. If you select it, people will be able to browse everyone's requests and both maybe target offers so they can write for a specific person, and be able to find treats (extra bonus gifts) to write for people whose requests they like. Each side has its own benefits or negatives, it's up to you which ones you want to go with!

And here we get into more of the matching info! Let's look at Request Settings.

Now this is what the settings would look like for a multi-fandom exchange. The "details/description" box you want to make mandatory because that is where people will put their DNW and their prompts (and you absolutely want to make sure everyone has a DNW), and the url is an optional one which lets people link an off-site letter on google docs or dreamwidth.

Fandom allowing up to three fandoms means that people can do crossovers if they want (or tag a request something like 3rd life/hermitcraft), and if I wanted to say that people had to request 3 separate servers I would say "must be unique" but I'm okay if people sign up with three Dream SMP relationships in this idea hypothetical exchange, so I'm not selecting the unique button.

I'm ignoring the characters button cause that's extra complication, the only other thing I want to look at is the relationship button. A minimum of 1 ship per request (and there's a minimum of three requests), and let's say you can go up to 20, so people can request LOTS of different ships. I did select "must be unique" so someone can't sign up with the same ship three times. The "allow any" button is off, which means that I will have to select relationships that fit under the fandom that I selected one up, I can't request Shubble/Niki Nihachu (Origins), and put it with a fandom request for Hermitcraft. This has set it so that the absolutely minimum someone can sign up with is 3 relationships (3 requests * 1 relationship each), and the absolute maximum is 200 relationships (10 requests * 20 relationships each).

Requests will look much the same, except I am not putting down details/description or a URL, because I'm not letting people submit requests about what ship they "really" want to match on, they are going to be equally matchable to everyone they offered. Some exchanges will let you submit a requests DNW, but honestly that is so much extra work for the mods, I would not recommend it unless you think it's necessary to stop people from dropping their gifts later.

Okay, so now we take a brief digression into a tag set.

THE TAG SET

Okay so basically a tag set is an extra set of sliders that lets you fine-tune your exchange. If you do not use a tag set, when people sign up they will be able to use every canon tag on the archive, and only canon tags. Which is a LOT of tags, but when I ran an exchange without a tag set there were multiple times of hitting non-canon relationships or tags. But it's also a definite extra complication, tag sets are extra fiddly work and they are even less intituive. If you just want to go without a tag set, skip down to the matching segment. If you do want to avoid hitting people signing up with non-canon tags, keep reading.

I'm gonna say right off the bat that tag sets are the single most like "oh I am getting into the GUTS of the machine" part of running Ao3 exchanges, but if you can make them work they can super streamline both the sign-up (for your participants ) and the matching process (for you).

Oh boy, tag sets. Here we start getting into how exchanges start squeezing the interface to make it do what we want it to. I'm using a tag set, so first I clicked on the "tag set" url there and I made my tag set, and then I came back and selected its name from the drop-down menu on the collection. I leave all the tick boxes open, because selecting them will again restrict you to canon tags, and we specifically want to be open to noncanon tags both because of issues like "ijevin & tiny tim" not being a canon tag, and because the way MCYT tags are wrangled and made canon does not work for how the exchange machine reads information. We specifically want a collection of non-canon tags tuned for our needs. More on that later.

So, I started a new tag set, and I'm over there on that screen, looking at it. What does that screen look like?

Okay so, part of the appeal of a tag set is that your participants are able to specify the difference between "Rendog & InTheLittleWood" and "Rendog/InTheLittleWood". You don't have to worry about people getting undesired shipping, because people were specifying if they wanted shipping when they signed up. You can reduce a great deal of people getting matched badly by using relationship matching, because most of the time even if people want a Tommy-centric fic, there's a pretty big difference between people who want "Tommy & Technoblade" and "Tommy & Dream". By specifying who you want the gift to be about, you remove a big hurdle of matching right away. That's why most exchanges run on relationship matching.

However, if there are 37 people on a given server, that's something like 2,600 possible combinations of people if you include both romantic and platonic, and that's before you start getting into trios, and that's just way too many tags for the mods to enter manually. So what you do is run a nomination period, and for a week or two weeks you go to all your participants and you go "do you want to sign up for this exchange? Nominate the tags you want to use now! If it doesn't get nominated, it can't be used!" And then people head to the tag set to nominate.

So, on this page, you want "visible tag list" to be selected, because you want people to see what's already been nominated so they don't duplicate, and you want "currently taking nominations" to be selected because you will be taking those nominations instead of doing them all yourself.

So you have to set up limits on those nominations.

The point of taking nominations is to make matching easier, so people normally use the same fandom and relationship limits as they are going to use on the sign-up, to make sure there aren't dozens of tags in the tag set that nobody's using, just cluttering up the space. It also helps stop the issue where someone sees a tag in the tag set, goes "oh man I love that ship" and signs up, but its an extra tag that no one intended to offer, so they don't match to anyone. That's why sometimes people keep the amount of tags that can be nominated low, I've seen people limit this to 10 tags, or even 7, so that's up to you.

And you save, and now when you link your participants the tag set, they will have a "nominate" button.

They will hurry over to press that button, and then they will see a page that looks like this.

This is a thing where you absolutely want to give your participants detailed instructions, because what Ao3 will try to do is auto-fill people's nominations with canonical tags. WE DO NOT WANT CANONICAL TAGS. CANONICAL TAGS ARE THE ENEMY OF EXCHANGES. CANONICAL TAGS ARE THE ENEMY OF MCYT EXCHANGES IN PARTICULAR.

Remember back when we clicked the button that says tags have to be unique? The canonical tag for Philza & Technoblade doesn't have a server on it, and people might want to be requesting that relationship for SMPEarth, Dream SMP, Origins SMP, or arguably even QSMP. If you only have the canonical tag, people can only request a specific dynamic once, for one server. And that is a problem for every situation where people interacted on multiple servers, and with the network of overlaps that is Empires/SOS/3rd Life/Hermitcraft and DSMP/Origins/SMPEarth/QSMP, that's going to lead to unhappy participants. So you tell people to nominate the ship and also "disambiguate" it, and add the server in parentheses. And then all your participants will hit the button to submit, and you will go into the "review nominations" button, and you will let those tags into the tag set.

Now I just distributed the tag set to a couple friends, so let's look at what this looks like behind the scenes.

Brace yourself, it's gonna be wild, but I believe we can get through it.

Now here is a perfectly standard look at tag set nominations after a few people have gotten into the tag set. This is why they pay tag mods the big bucks.

As you can see, there are a few things to be gathered. The first things is a bunch of people used the canon tags (because that's what Ao3 tries to get them to do), someone else nominated an x-reader ship, we have one tag there twice (spelled differently), and the tags are Piped (they have both the person's tax name and the username). (You can let tags in that are Piped, but I find that it makes the tag set harder to read, and usually exchanges are character-focused unless you're writing video blogging rpf anyways, so I ask people to submit tags unpiped, using usernames.) And for the tags that were nominated in a way that I want (unpiped, and disambiguated so they're unique), Ao3 is trying to get me to use the canon tag. But I don't want the canon tag, I want a unique tag, with the server on it, with no pipes. So.

So were I moderating the tag set, after a few minutes it would look like this.

That's going through and disambiguating the tags (adding the server, which I could tell because of the fandom it was nominated under), removing the piping and using the usernames instead of tax names, and then re-ordering the names so they're alphabetical so people can find them on the list later, rejecting the x-reader tag, rejecting the duplicate and allowing the one that's spelled correctly through. Amazing. I have tags that I want to use (I did some other tags that were ready to go in other fandoms as well). I hit submit. Am I ready to go?

No, because tag sets are the most complicated part of exchanges.

I open up my tag set, and if I scroll down to "Unassociated characters and relationships" there are a bunch of tags that are are lost, Ao3 doesn't know where to put them. This is because we very carefully made unique tags that have not been wrangled anywhere, and Ao3 said "i don't know where these go" and shoved them all together in a garbage bin at the bottom of the page. So we have to manually go in to associate them to the right fandoms.

You hit the Edit button on the tag set, and scroll down to the bottom, to "tag associations", and start selecting where tags go.

Honestly this is a great time to be listening to a stream or a podcast or something, and then you have the tag set open in another tab so you know what all the unassociated tags are, and you just go down the list like a databasing machine. It is not hard, cause you disambiguated each tag with its own server, it's just time consuming. Note. This is why people go in and accept tags regularly during the nomination period, because if you do this all at the end you've got a BIG job ahead of you.

So, you turned on your VOD playlist and you associated all your tags, and all the tags are where they are supposed to go. You have a beautiful tag set.

But wait, you say, looking at this beautiful tag set. Some of those tags look at little different. What is the "Dream smp and only dream smp" that a couple of them have?

Well.

You see.

Ao3 designed tag sets to work a certain way, and nobody uses them that way. It turns out that "Quackity/Wilbur Soot (Dream SMP)" is a wrangled canon tag, and the system goes "ah, I know where this goes, this is a sub-tag of the major tag, and the top-level tag is Video Blogging RPF, so it goes under Video Blogging RPF, as all MCYT tags do. I am very smart. I have stuck this Dream SMP tag under Video Blogging RPF. I am a good machine". And then you go AUUUUUUUUGH, and then you turn up the podcast a little louder, and then you sit down and you delete the old tag and you write out a new tag that the system doesn't know what to do with, and it goes uhhhhhhh and sticks it in "unassociated tags" and then you go in again and you manually associate it into the right server.

It's not hard, it's just time consuming. Shouting at the tag set like STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO as it helpfully tries to stick dsmp tags in SMPearth and you wrestle it out of SMPEarth and into the right fandom bucket.

Deep breath moment. Honestly that's the most fiddly part of a fiddly process, so if you can get through this you're absolutely golden.

Anyways. You got clean disambiguated unique tags, and then you associated them in the right spot, and then you found the ones that got sorted to the wrong spot and you associated them yourself, and now you have a beautiful tag set ready to go. It's a thing of beauty. Shed a tear. Your participants can select from anything in this tag set, and you know they want to use these specific relationships, because they submitted them to you. What next?

THE MATCHING

Okay. You have your tag set set up and it's accepting nominations. Your participants are filling it out right now. You go back to your collection. it's time to tell it how to match.

This is the "minimum number to match" pane, and this is the minimum numbers to make a successful match. You want 1 for Fandom, and 1 for Relationship, and that's it. People will show up to the machine as a viable match as long as they have submitted a fandom and relationship that matches someone else's offered fandom and relationship.

This is a minimum viable exchange. You're ready to go. As soon as your tag set is done (or immediately if you're not using a tag set), you're ready to go back and open your exchange to sign-ups.

Congratulations!

FURTHER TWEAKING

HOWEVER. There is more that you can do. For example, do you want to allow people to request or opt into NSFW? There's an easy way to do that! First thing is you go back to your tag set, and you scroll down to the "ratings" section that you've been ignoring.

You select G and E, and that way, if people are opting into explicit that means they're okay with NSFW, and if they only select G, that means they only want a non-explicit piece.

Then on the collection you switch the requests and offers sections to include a place to specify a rating.

You want them to definitely specify at least one, and if you maximum allowed is 2, people can opt into both and say "i'm good with whatever"!

Then you scroll down to the matching section, and you tweak that to make sure that people will match on Fandom, Relationship, and at least one Rating.

Bingo. You now have a toggle to turn NSFW on and off.

But a lot of people like to match by TYPE of gift too, specifying if they want art or fic or playlist or web weave etc. How do you do that? Ah, at this point you are master of all you survey, and you can make tag sets do absolutely anything you want. You go back to the tag set and you scroll down to "characters".

Now we were matching on relationships, so the character box is unused. And it lets you put in your own tags. So what you do is you start to add in custom tags.

And then you go back to the Collection settings, and on the requests and the offers you go in to the "characters" section and you say "must select at least one, can select up to six".

And then, you guessed it— you go back to "minimum number to match" and you set that "characters" tab to 1 minimum, 6 maximum. Now people who specified that they wanted Art can be matchable to artists who Offered Art. You have unlimited power, the world is at your fingertips.

There's even more customization that you can do, too! There's "additional tags", which is entirely custom tags you add yourself, that can be anything from specifying if people want fluff or horror or hurt/comfort etc— with the recursive exchange we used it to specify the works people were recursing— I'm considering using it for holidays with the holiday exchange. You can let people opt in or out of major archive warnings by selecting "archive warnings" as a thing that's in the tag set and that you're matching for. Once you understand how the underpinnings of how the machine works, you can wrestle it into almost any shape you want.

So. Whew. That's how exchanges work, under the hood. When I say that this is significantly easier than hand matching the holiday exchange, I ask you to picture just how complicated hand matching gets. Go forth! Thrive! Set up exchanges if you want! The world is your oyster!

Feel free to message me if you have further questions.

#mcyt on Ao3 #fandom exchanges #ao3 #fandom exchange

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insecateur · 10 months

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tfw you're trying to show off how Pokémon Amie works but your test subject just Cannot Wait to get its tasty treat

#pokemon #pokemon xy #augustine sycamore #professor sycamore #eevee #samart #drawn for an ao3 exchange that just revealed so i'm posting it

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midnightwhisperingrock · 2 years

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Midnight at Whispering Rock - Post-Deadline Pinch Hits (Pinch Hit Round #2)

Pinch hits are requests in search of a creator! They have the same rules as assignments, including following DNWs, and meeting character/tag fulfillment and minimum requirements. Please help with fulfilling pinch hits to ensure everyone has a gift!

By default, post-deadline pinch hits are due at the same time as the inital reveals date (Oct 24 @ noon Pacific), however, pinch hitters may request an extension if they so choose.

You may submit a claim to a pinch hit via the Google form posted below the read more. You must have an AO3 account to claim a pinch hit, but you do not need to have signed up for Midnight at Whispering Rock beforehand.

This pinch hit round has 2 requests. Optional details and claim status for requests are posted below the read more. Reblogs may not reflect current claim status, so please check the original post for claim status.

Request 1: Barakuma

Format: Art

Characters: Augustus Aquato, Dion Aquato, Frazie Aquato, Norma (Psychonauts), Hollis Forsythe, Sasha Nein, Quentin Hedgemouse, Milka Phage, Elton Fir, Truman Zanotto, Gristol Malik | Nick Johnsmith, Razputin "Raz" Aquato, Phoebe Love, Donatella Aquato

Additional Tags: Scary Movies, Vampires, Scary Clowns, Trick or Treating, Monsters, Costumes, Possession

Request 2: the_angst_alchemist

Format: Art, Fic, Other

Characters: Bob Zanotto, Helmut Fullbear, Augustus Aquato, ALL: Psychic Seven, Fred Bonaparte, Boyd Cooper, Edgar Teglee, Gloria Von Gouton

Additional Tags: Dopplegangers, Dreams and Nightmares, Ghosts, Monster Hunters, Paranormal, Possession, Trick or Treating, Psychological Horror, Costumes

You may claim pinch hits via this Google form!

Request 1: Barakuma (CLAIMED)

Format: Art

Additional Tags: Scary Movies, Vampires, Scary Clowns, Trick or Treating, Monsters, Costumes, Possession

wanted some shipping like (sasha/augustus or frazie/norma) with stuff thats tagged is most welcomed I dont have anything id leave out

Request 2: the_angst_alchemist (CLAIMED)

Format: Art, Fic, Other

Characters: Bob Zanotto, Helmut Fullbear, Augustus Aquato, ALL: Psychic Seven, Fred Bonaparte, Boyd Cooper, Edgar Teglee, Gloria Von Gouton

Additional Tags: Dopplegangers, Dreams and Nightmares, Ghosts, Monster Hunters, Paranormal, Possession, Trick or Treating, Psychological Horror, Costumes

Hi! Thank you so much for writing for me. I'm honestly honored!

My username here is the_angst_alchemist, but if you post it on Tumblr, then please tag BritishSass. (also, if you need any info on literally anything about my thoughts, then just send me an ask, I won't mind it at all.)

General likes:

-I love nightmare fics! I've written some myself, but any sort of thing with that is always a thing I love.

-Ghost-hunting would be an incredibly fun time ^_^

-I ship Bob/Helmut, Lucy/Ford, Lucy/Cassie, Otto/Ford, and Fred/Boyd/Gloria/Edgar, so if you're gonna include ships, those are mine.

-I'm a-okay with trauma, torture, etc.

-I love seeing Bob and Otto being buddies who argue a lot.

Do Not Wants:

-Leave Raz out of danger, oh my god, leave him out of danger PLEASE

-Do NOT portray Augustus as a bad dad. I am being serious.

-Don't portray Crispin as a good guy.

-Don't harm any rats or owls. Those two are my comfort animals.

-Vomiting squicks me out.

Extra prompts:

-The trick-or-treating one is specifically because I think it'd be cute to have a story of someone taking either Truman or Raz out trick-or-treating when they're young! It's just there if you absolutely cannot do the rest.

-I think that a ghost-hunting fic could be super neat, especially if you could include Thorney Towers folks as the ghosts, maybe? Up to you, though!

-If you've seen Mystery Skulls: Animated, that sort of plot is equally as cool to me! Totally up to you on what characters.

For art, i would prefer something cute with a couple's costume for Bob/Helmut or the psychic 7 dressing up together! ^-^

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fairyvearths · 1 year

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3 times you try (and fail) to kiss luffy and the 1 time he kisses you

FANDOM: one piece WORD COUNT: 5, 300+ PAIRING: monkey d. luffy x reader WARNINGS: none, for the most part. a hint of jealousy, but it’s very small.

NOTE: hello @hawkix, i am your secret santa for the @onepiece-blorboexchange. i hope this piece is to your liking. merry christmas, and happy holidays 🎄🎁 also cross-posted on archive

one

“You’re best friends with Luffy, right?”

Zoro is sleeping—or at least, trying to. With how rambunctious the crew is right now, and the way the ship rocks on the waves, it’s pretty easy to assume that the man is still awake. That, and, you had seen his brows flinch slightly when your shadow fell over his face.

But still, he pretends.

Fine.

You kick him.

Zoro catches your ankle before you make contact with his leg. “Oi,” he snaps.

You flail for balance, a squeal sticking in your throat as your centre of gravity tilts.

Zoro pulls you as you fall and you crash on your side.

“Ow,” you say, mostly for show, because your arm had cushioned your landing and you’ve been through much worse than this. Zoro knows it too.

“Quit being a baby,” he grouses, shifting himself up higher on the railing now that he’s officially awoken from his nap. “The Hell were you thinking, trying to kick me?”

You roll onto your back. “You were ignoring me.”

“I was trying to sleep.”

“But you weren’t, yet.”

“Yeah—yet. I was getting there.”

“So you just ignored me?” You bat your arm in his general direction. “What if it was an emergency?”

“It wasn’t.”

“You don’t care about me.”

“The Hell?”

You giggle because he didn’t say, ‘Yeah, of course I don’t’ and that’s a win if you’ve ever encountered one. “You don’t,” you sigh, carpeting the floor with your faux misery. “I could die and you woul—”

“Shut up.” Zoro actually jabs you in the arm with the hilt of one of his swords.

“Hey!”

“You didn’t hit your head when you fell, right?”

You scoff, mirthful shock coating your words, “Are you calling me stupid?”

“No—I mean, I made sure you didn’t hit your head when you fell.”

It takes a while for his words to click in your brain, and when it does—Oh. You turn your head to look at him, cheek pressing into the hardwood floors. “Why can’t you just say you care about me like someone who isn’t emotionally constipated?”

Zoro scowls, crossing his arms across his chest and looking away like he’s a four-year-old child throwing a tantrum. “Is this what you woke me up for?” he grumbles.

You want to keep ribbing him, but you understand that Zoro is being defensive, so you take his cue and reroute the conversation. “No, actually—I wanted to ask you a favour.”

He turns back, scepticism raising his brows. “About Luffy?”

You open your mouth to ask how he knows, but you realise you had asked about your captain when you approached Zoro. “So you did ignore me,” you gasp, slightly maybe a lot offended.

“Yeah, of course I did—I was trying to sleep!” he shoots back.

It’s your turn to cross your arms over your chest and cast your gaze to the sky. “I can’t believe you.”

Zoro clicks his tongue before tapping your leg lightly with his foot. “What’d you need help with?”

“Nah,” you push out with a breath, “I don’t want your help anymore.”

“Fine,” Zoro says, yawning. “Go somewhere else—I’m trying to sleep.”

You slap his knee. “Oi.”

“What do you need, then?”

“I wanna kiss Luffy.”

A beat. Then, “And you’re telling me, because?”

“Because, Zoro,” you say, turning to face him again, “last time I tried, you called his attention to a Sea King and ran off with him.”

Zoro snorts. “So, go kiss him now.” He jerks his chin towards the deck where he, Usopp and Chopper are gathered. “He’s not busy.”

“It’s not that simple,” you intone, stretching out your words. “I can’t just do it out of nowhere, it has to be proper and—”

“Oh, kill me now,” Zoro whispers in exasperation. He deflects another one of your attacks, knocking your hand out of its trajectory. “If you wanted romantic, you should’ve gone to the Cook.”

“But he’s your best friend,” you reiterate. “You know him better than anyone here.”

Zoro sighs, long-sufferingly. “Have you tried talking to him?” he asks, tired.

“No?” Bewilderment laces your tone, falling in a heavy heap on the ground. “I’m not telling Luffy I want to kiss him.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s weird; I can’t just tell him, I just gotta do it.”

“Then do it—He’s right there.” Once again, he gestures towards your captain, as if you’re not already hyperaware of his presence.

“Not like that,” you hiss.

“Oh, my God,” Zoro grumbles. “Stop being difficult.”

“I’m not! I just need to you to help me—”

“I’m trying! You keep dismissing my solutions. It’s so easy, here, look—Luffy!”

Your heart jumps into your throat as Zoro hollers, and you leap forward to cover his mouth. You misjudge the distance, punching him in the cheek instead.

“What the fuck?” Zoro rears his head back, slapping your hand away.

“Shit, I’m so sorry—” You retract your offending limb, covering your mouth in shock. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, didn’t hurt,” he says, and you can tell he’s not just saying it to make you feel better. The man’s been through so much worse, and you both know it. “Just, what the fuck, though?”

“I didn’t mean to,” you lament. “I just—You yelled, and I was trying to stop you, but I—”

“What’s up?”

You didn’t scream.

You didn’t.

You just, got startled. Because it was Luffy. And he came out of nowhere. And if Zoro or Luffy said you screamed… well.

They don’t know what they’re talking about.

You whip around, heart hammering in your throat because you were just talking about kissing Luffy, and now the man is here, squatting in front of you, and you don’t know how much he may have overheard. “Nothing!” Your voice comes out high and nervous.

“Fucking—” Zoro sighs, nudging you towards Luffy with his calf because in your scramble to shut Zoro up, you’d landed on his leg. “Can you just ki—”

You’re more successful this time, shouting over the top of his words and slapping a hand to his mouth. “What the Hell is wrong with y—Ow!” You wrench your hand away at a sharp sting on your palm. “Did you just bite me?” At Zoro’s deadpan stare, you furrow your brows. “What kinda feral—?”

Behind you, Luffy laughs; so loud and carefree that your heart stutters in your chest.

You think you might pass out, but you turn to look at your captain because his joy is always a sight to behold.

“Wow,” Zoro muses aloud, “you are down ba—”

You jerk your elbow into Zoro’s stomach, cutting off his words. “Shut up!” you hiss.

“What were you guys talking about?” Luffy asks again when he settles down.

“Nothing,” you repeat, voice calmer.

Zoro rolls his eyes. “Really?”

“Except for the fact that Zoro is being a butthead,” you say pointedly.

“Butthead?” the butthead echoes.

“Ah.” Luffy nods sagely. “That sounds like Zoro.”

“Oi!”

You giggle, watching as Zoro grabs a sword and jolts the hilt towards Luffy’s face.

Luffy grabs the hilt to deflect it, but when Zoro pulls his weapon back, Luffy careens forward.

“Ah!” The shout is more from surprise than anything, Luffy’s knee colliding with your shin as he practically falls on you.

“Shit,” Zoro breathes.

“Oh.” Luffy scrambles himself off your leg. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” you dismiss his concern. “That actually didn’t hurt, I’m fine.” You’re hefting yourself up with your elbows, expecting Luffy to move out of your way.

But he doesn’t.

And now you’ve almost pushed yourself up against his chest.

And he’s looking at you so earnestly your cheeks are flushing. “Are you sure you’re okay?” he presses.

You nod, throat thick. Body warm. Your eyes dart down to his lips. The urge to kiss him rises tenfold. Maybe you could just do it. No fancy situation, no set up. Just… this. With him hovering over you because it just happened that way. Staring at you with concern swimming in his pupils.

“So, can I go now?” Zoro pipes up from behind you.

You startle, bumping a shoulder into Luffy’s chin.

Luffy recoils, effectively severing the moment.

“I am so sorry!” you gasp, reaching out to cradle his head. “Oh God, are you okay?”

Luffy nods in your hands, chuckling lightly. “’M fine.”

“Zoro, you can’t just do that!” you hiss at him.

“I have been here the whole time,” he deadpans. “But it seems I’ve done my job, so I’m gonna g—”

Luffy tilts his head. “What job?”

“Nothing!” you yell before Zoro can answer, letting go of Luffy like you’ve been burnt. “Nothing.” You slide out from between the two of them and clamber to your feet. “You take your nap,” you say to Zoro, “and you can go back to—” You signal towards Usopp and Chopper, “playing, I don’t know.” You smile at Luffy even though you don’t really feel it. “I’ll go.” You depart before the two of them can say anything to you.

“You were too much of a butthead,” Luffy says in a low enough voice that you know he’s not talking to you.

There’s the sound of something hard hitting something fleshy.

“How’s this my fault?” Zoro retaliates.

You duck into your room before you can hear if their banter escalates to sparring.

two

There’s a stabbing pain in your side, but you ignore it in favour of running across the rubble—or at least, try to. The sharp ache is all encompassing, and you’re pretty sure you’re bleeding out as well.

But right now, it’s of no matter.

What is of matter, though, is the fact that Luffy is on the other side of this debris, and you need to get to him.

You crest the peak and start down the slope towards the ground, towards your captain wobbling on his feet, bruised and ruffled. “Luffy!”

He turns when you call out to him, face lighting up when he catches sight of you.

You’re practically tripping over your own feet to make it over to him, teeth gritting at the jabs that lance through your ribs.

He crashes into your body when you enter his personal space, your legs faltering under the unanticipated weight.

You catch yourself on your knees, holding in the gasp that wants to escape because him jarring into you didn’t help. You wrap your arms beneath his shoulders to keep him up. “Hey,” you breathe out, chest releasing some of the air that had been trapped in there at the thought of your captain in peril. “You okay?” You’re frantically pawing at his face, thumbs swiping at the blood and cuts.

Luffy nods, a soft smile pulling at his lips. “’M good,” he manages to answer around you pulling on his skin. “Are you?”

“Yeah.” Satisfied with your inspection—his wounds are shallow and will heal up at a rate that still shocks you—relief pools into your stomach. “We’re good, we won.”

He furrows his brows, eyes scanning your face before they rest down your body. “You’re hurt,” he states.

“It’s fine.” You shake your head, hiding a wince because, yeah, it does hurt, but you don’t want him to fuss over you when he looks like this. “I’ll be fine.”

“You’re bleeding,” he reiterates, cupping a hand over your wound.

“Ah!” You shrink away from his touch, unbalancing both you and him because he had been essentially leaning on you for support.

Luffy circles his arm around you, righting you before you topple backwards, taking him down too. “You’re hurt,” he repeats, voice soft.

You stare at him, face so close to yours that you can see his eyelashes. You’re so pressed up against him that you feel him breathing on your chest, every rise and fall in tandem with yours.

His heart is beating quickly—or maybe it’s yours.

It probably is yours.

He’s so close to you, and your brain feels like mush; lightheaded and echoey. Your ears thunder with the sound of your own heart. Your breaths catch in your chest.

“We should get you to Chopper,” he murmurs. He looks behind you, over the debris, where the rest of the crew should be.

A part of your brain knows it’s urgent, but the other part can’t stop staring at his lips as he speaks. “Luffy,” you utter.

He snaps his focus back to you, gaze darting between your eyes. “What?”

You shift your weight onto his, and he takes it easily, tightening his arm around you. You can feel your breath blow back on your face with how hard you’re breathing onto Luffy’s. Your head fills more and more with cotton as you careen towards his lips.

You black out before you make it.

three

After the fiasco of employing Zoro’s assistance, you decide that he actually isn’t much help at all. So the next best thing is to go to Robin. Because she’s clever, and smart.

You sit her down in the quiet of the aquarium and tell her about your dilemma, and about Zoro’s ridiculous suggestion of ‘just asking Luffy,’ and how nothing you’ve tried has worked.

She laughs at the end of your recollection, a soft thing that she hides in her palm before standing up. “Come with me,” she says.

You follow her, recognising the walk to the library as you’re halfway there.

She settles you down at the table before disappearing between some shelves, to, presumably, find a book. When she returns, a light in her eye, you know she’s found something good. “It’s Christmas soon,” she says as though it’s a suggestion.

“Okay?” you ask, bemused.

She chuckles softly, rifling through the pages to find the spread she wants and places it on the desk, tilting it so it’s upright for you to read. “Mistletoe.”

You look down at the page, a drawing of said plant on display. “Uh-huh.”

“It’s tradition,” she begins, “for people to kiss when they’re caught under a mistletoe together.”

You glance up at her. “Oh. So, we just have to get some mistletoe,” you say. The plan sounds easy enough.

But.

“Where, exactly, are we gonna get some mistletoe?”

“Next time we stop by an island, I suppose,” she muses quietly. “It’s a Christmas tradition,” she elaborates, “so at this time of year, people will be selling these everywhere.”

“Great—thank you.” You already feel much better about her advice than you did with Zoro’s. You lift the page between your fingers, pulling the paper.

Arms sprout from the table, clutching at your wrist.

“What,” Robin says, a harsh lilt to her tone, “are you doing?”

“I just need to know what it looks like.”

“You’ve seen what it looks like,” she continues in the same voice.

“Yeah, but I’m not gonna remember it once we get to an island.”

“So, you decide to vandalise my book?”

“I’m not vandali—Ow, ow!” You let go of the page as she tightens her hold around you. “Okay, I made a mistake,” you cry.

The arms disappear. “I’ll buy it for you,” she resumes the conversation like nothing happened. “You can find some place to put it afterwards.”

You feel like you got whiplashed. “Okay,” you whisper, confused. “Thank you?”

It’s another three days before the ship docks at a small island, and Robin comes back with two sprigs of mistletoe. She hands one to you, keeping the other ‘just in case.’ You don’t really know what that means, but at this point, you know well enough to just leave her and her property alone.

“Where’s a good place to put this?” you ask, dangling the twig between your fingers.

“Where would Luffy spend most of his time?”

You sigh.

You burst into the kitchen, having checked through the windows to make sure it was devoid of your captain first.

Sanji looks up at your sudden entrance, scraping carrots into a bowl. “Dinner’s almost ready,” he informs you absently. He returns to cutting the vegetables. “Probably start cooking in ten minutes.”

“That’s not why I’m here.”

That piques his interest, the blond looking up again. “What’s up?” he asks, attention now more evenly split between the food prep and you.

“I…” You glance out the windows, as though talking about Luffy would summon him. “Need your help with something.”

“Mine?”

“Yeah.” You approach the counter where he’s working, sitting on a stool opposite him. “I need to put this,” you lift the sprig higher so he can see, “somewhere in here.”

Sanji stares at the plant. “Mistletoe?”

“Yes, see.” You tell him about Robin’s ingenious plan to help you kiss Luffy. And how Sanji knows the kitchen better than anyone, and knows where Luffy lingers the most.

Sanji lets out a sharp breath of amusement through his nose. “Okay.”

“Great! Just—not now. Christmas is in five days, so—”

“I got it,” Sanji says. “Keep it safe ‘til then.”

“Exactly, thank you!”

The following week is busy; the crew gathering to decorate the Sunny, and making quick stops onshore to find gifts for one another. Between draping garland and wrapping presents, you find yourself migrating to the kitchen a lot.

It’s not that you don’t trust Sanji.

But.

This is really important to you, and you don’t know if he’ll prioritise it the same. You make sure the mistletoe is still alive and fresh. Hidden somewhere out of sight and not easily disposed of if someone else were to help out in the kitchen. Most days, you volunteer yourself to assist, just so you know another crew member won’t find it, and then no embarrassing explanation would have to ensue.

It’s easier that way.

“Good morning,” Sanji greets, already anticipating your arrival with a cup of tea.

“Hey.” You take a sip before putting the beverage down. “Is—”

“Yep,” he says, already taking out the tin from the cupboard and sliding it across the countertop to you. “Same place as it was last night, when you checked. And the time before that, and before that too. And—”

“Alright,” you snap, no heat in your tone. “I’m just…” You shrug, at a loss for why you feel so obsessive over a piece of tree.

“Nervous?”

You sigh. “Yeah.”

Sanji pushes the tea over to your hands, and you smile at him. “How about, no more looking at it today.”

You frown. “I don’t think that’s gonna help.”

“Did looking at it help?”

You close the lid and pass it back to him. “No,” you admit quietly.

“I don’t think you’re stressed about the mistletoe disappearing,” Sanji says, voice incredibly soft as he addresses you.

You hum, tapping your fingers on the sides of the cup. “I just… want it to work.” Because if it doesn’t…

If it doesn’t…

That’s not something you want to think about.

“It will.” And he says it with so much certainty that for a second, you believe it too.

You don’t check up on the mistletoe for the rest of the day, but you do still help out in the kitchen.

You’re staring at the counter, where you know the mistletoe is. You know it’s there. You saw it this morning. Sanji let you put it back in there before closing the cupboard and declaring that place off-limits to you. And no one else had come in, other than to eat, and that was over here by the dining tables, not over there.

There’s still a gnawing feeling in your stomach, but you haven’t seen it. So, what if? What if someone came through, looking for something else, and in their search, saw it and took it?

“Are you okay?”

You blink back to the present, snippets of conversation tuning back into focus like a radio. Right. Dinner with the crew. Everyone’s here, eating and having fun.

Sanji is peering at you from across the table, waiting for your answer.

“Yeah,” you say. “Just—distracted.” You look back down to your plate, surprised to find that nothing’s been taken from it.

“Do you want to check it?”

You purse your lips in thought. It would help.

But.

“No.” You shake your head. “I’ve already gone most of the day, right?” you say. “No point caving now.”

“If you’re sure,” Sanji relents. At your nod, he sighs. “Can you just eat something?”

You stick your spoon into the rice.

A chicken drumstick is placed on your plate, and when you follow the hand attached to it, you realise it belongs to Luffy, sitting on the far end of the table.

“You look sad,” he calls across, retracting his arm.

“I’m fine,” you dismiss his concern, turning back to your food. “Thanks.”

The rest of the crew watches, astounded at their captain’s generosity, and your lack of response.

When Christmas finally arrives, you’re not sure how you feel. Yes, it’s Christmas, so you’re excited. But that means putting up the mistletoe and finally bringing your plan to fruition. And that part, you’re more reluctant about.

You’re the first one in the kitchen aside from Sanji, and he looks up, smiling at you.

“Door,” he says.

You turn, watching it close. “What?”

“The mistletoe,” he reiterates. “Put it up last night.”

“Oh!” With the new information, you tilt your head back. It sways gently from the door’s motions. “That’s the best place for it?”

“Luffy comes and goes upwards of twenty times a day.” Sanji sounds sure of himself. “If there’s any place that he frequents a lot, it’s that door.”

“Thanks, Sanji,” you say, beelining for the tea he’s left for you on the counter.

Sanji starts to crack eggs into a mixing bowl, and you stare at your drink. “How are you feeling?”

You shrug. “Still nervous, but… not much else I can do about it.”

“Just.” He takes a whisk from the drawer. “Don’t think about it too much.”

Scoffing, you take a sip of your tea. “I really don’t think there’s anything else for me to think about, right now.”

“What do you want for breakfast?” he asks.

“Whatever you’re making,” you say absently, “I don’t mind.” You’re two-thirds of the way through your drink when you speak again. “What if it doesn’t go right?”

“How?”

“Like, what if…?” You swallow something thick. “What if he doesn’t want to kiss me? Then I’ve just—”

Luffy crashes through the door, startling you out of your conversation with Sanji. He scans the kitchen, face lighting up when he makes eye contact with you, bounding over. “What are you doing in here?” he asks, plopping himself down in the chair you’re standing next to.

“Nothing,” you deflect, because you don’t really want to tell him that you were lamenting to Sanji about whether he’d kiss you or not. But your answer is suspicious too, so you retract your earlier statement with what you hope is a carefree shrug.

(It’s not.)

“I was helping out with food and stuff.” You turn to the eggs already beaten laid out in front of Sanji. Shit.

Luffy hums, a slight dejection to the note. “Come outside,” he says instead.

You pause, trying to think of an excuse. “But we gotta make breakfast, then there’s the big Christmas dinn—”

“But I miss you,” he says, frowning.

Oh.

“We donʼt hang out much, anymore.”

You blink, gulping your dangerously loud heart back into your chest. It’s suddenly warm in the kitchen even though the ovens and stoves are off. “Okay,” you croak.

Luffy beams at you, and your breath sweeps away. He grabs your hand to lead you out, and your palm feels clammy in his.

As you’re leaving, Sanji clears his throat.

Luffy stops, turning around. “What?” he asks.

You turn too, a murderous glare pointed at the blond. Shut the fuck up, you will towards him.

Sanji flickers his gaze over your heads.

“What?” Luffy repeats.

“Nothing,” you say quickly, trying to step further onto the deck to steer him out of the kitchen.

Luffy purses his lips, standing his ground. He’s always been stronger than you, so your attempts to move him are rendered futile because he’s not cooperating. “No, I wanna know,” he presses. There’s a pout to his lips, and you can’t help but think he looks cute like this.

“It’s just.” You swallow thickly, tilting your head up to look at the top of the door frame.

Luffy follows your eyes, zeroing in on the lone green tendril hanging off the door. “Ah,” he says.

You watch him, trepidation drying your tongue.

“Why’d Sanji put food in such a weird place?”

“What?”

He shoots his arm towards it, clutching the plant in his hands—leaves and all.

And shoves it in his mouth.

“No!”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Sanji yells, vaulting over the counter. He grabs Luffy by the back of the neck. “Spit it out!”

“Luffy, that was mistletoe,” you say when you’ve gotten over the initial shock. Your hands are hovering over him, wanting to help but not sure how because Sanji is already there, and you’d only be in the way.

“So?” he manages to say around Sanji trying to pull his mouth open.

“Mistletoe is poisonous, you dumbass!” Sanji growls, realising that it’s already been swallowed. “We need to get you to Chopper.”

“But I feel fine,” Luffy protests.

You usher your captain out the door, heartbeat reverberating loudly in your throat. “No, please just—C’mon.” You walk around Luffy when you’ve exited the kitchen, pulling on his hand to lead him to the infirmary. You look at Sanji over Luffy’s shoulder. “You go…” You gesture back inside the kitchen. “I got this.”

“You sure?” Sanji asks.

You nod. “There’s a lot to do for today.” You turn back around, glancing at the rest of the deck. “Chopper!” you call out to him when you see the reindeer with Usopp and Nami.

Chopper darts his head up, looking at you. “Yeah?”

“We need you in here!” you say, pointing your thumb back towards the door of the doctor’s office.

There’s clambering as Chopper disregards his prior activities—unwrapping presents, judging by the colours on the floor—to run over. “What happened?” he asks when he’s closer.

“I ate something,” Luffy says when you open the door. “Sanji said it was poisonous.”

“Mistletoe,” you interject before Chopper can panic too much. You stand to the side, letting them in first.

“Mistletoe?” Chopper repeats.

“It’s… a long story.”

plus one

Chopper releases Luffy from the infirmary after coming to the conclusion that the captain’s run-in with Magellan has heightened his tolerance for poison. So eating a twig of mistletoe will do nothing more to him than upset his stomach, which should pass on its own.

After the little doctor confirms this, you breathe out a sigh of relief.

Luffy turns to you; a smile on his face, a comment on his tongue of how you’d been so worried over nothing, but—

You’re exiting the room, door shutting behind you.

“Hey!” Luffy scrambles off the bed, sidestepping Chopper with a quick ‘Thanks!’ before dashing outside to find you.

You’re faster than anticipated, halfway to the dorms.

But Luffy has abilities that you don’t, so he stretches his arms, hooking his palm around the mast to slingshot himself forward, landing in front of you with a grunt.

“Fuck!” you hiss, jumping backwards, eyes wild with his sudden appearance.

“Sorry!” Luffy is quick to placate you.

“What the Hell?”

“Didn’t mean to scare you—What’s wrong?” He interrupts himself with the question because thatʼs more important right now, and knowing how the two of you like to banter, you’d gloss over how you’re feeling in order to keep teasing him about startling you.

“What?”

“There’s something wrong with you,” Luffy says, because he hasn’t been seeing much of you this past week, and he thought that maybe you just wanted time for yourself to recharge, but you were always in the kitchen with Sanji, instead of hanging out with him like you usually did, and that—

He pushes that aside.

Not important right now.

“There’s nothing wrong with me,” you say quietly.

“Yes, there is.” He’s insistent, knowing that whatever it is is bothering you.

“It’s just… I wanted to—” You sigh. “Nothing,” you dismiss. Then, “It’s stupid.”

“What’s stupid about it?”

You pause, thinking about his question. “I… don’t know.”

“So, it can’t be stupid.”

Your lips quirk up, a brief thing that lights up your face for a millisecond, but Luffy watches, enamoured, because he hasn’t seen it in so long.

“It’s…” You shrug, hesitation dancing across your features. You stare up at him, and he really wishes your eyes weren’t apprehensive.

“Tell me,” he presses gently.

“I want to kiss you.”

“Oh.” He suddenly finds it hard to breathe. “And that makes you upset?” The thought of that squeezes his chest.

“No, no! That doesn’t make me upset, it’s just, I’ve been trying to kiss you for the past month, but things would happen, and I couldn’t do it, and then we came up with this plan with the mistletoe, but you—”

He stretches his arms, wrapping them around your waist to pull you towards him. He leans down and seals his mouth over yours, effectively silencing you.

You gasp in surprise, but the noise is swallowed up, lips chasing after yours. He’s squeezing you to him, waist pulled in so close he can barely think straight.

You wrap your arms around his neck, urging him closer, and Luffy tilts his head, fingers breaching the hem of your shirt to caress your skin. You whimper, so delightfully desperate that Luffy pushes against you, tongue swiping across your bottom lip.

He loves the noise—the neediness lacing your tone that he’s only ever heard you use towards him. Every time he’s been unimaginably close to you, he’d notice the way you’d stare at him, full of want and unadulterated longing that it fogs his brain and tightens his heart down to his stomach.

And how you’d whisper his name, like you did back in the forest, even though you were bleeding out. You were staring at his lips and he thought you were going to kiss him, and he realised that in that moment, he wanted to, too. And he would’ve. If you hadn’t passed out immediately after.

Then after he’d taken you to Chopper and you recovered, you pulled away, secluding yourself in the kitchen with Sanji, pretty much all day.

But, now.

Luffy gets to kiss you. He giggles into your mouth, something light bubbling away in his chest.

You pull away from him, breathing heavily. “Why did you do that?”

“Because you wanted to.”

“But did you want to?”

He thinks about you; his crewmate, nakama, friend. Someone he trusts with his life. Had gone through the biggest ups and downs of his life with you. Then he thinks about kissing you, of how many times he’d wanted to in the past, even before the forest. “Yeah.” And because he can, he pulls you in for another kiss, and he feels you smiling against his lips.

When you part this time, it’s his turn to ask a question. “Why didn’t you just kiss me when you wanted to?”

“Because it’s weird,” you say as if it’s common sense. “You can’t just kiss a friend out of nowhere.”

“But we’re not just friends. We’re… different.”

“Different?” you echo.

“The way I feel about you, and us, it’s different from how I feel about the others. It’s just different with you.”

You swallow and Luffy watches your throat move. “So, you’re saying, I could have kissed you, at any time, in the past few months, and you would have been okay with it?”

Luffy nods. “Yep.”

You purse your lips. “Oh, dear Lord,” you mutter under your breath, “Zoro was right.”

“About what?”

“He said I should’ve just asked you—I thought he was being daft.”

Luffy laughs, and you smile up at him, drinking in the noise. “You’re silly.”

You nod, before double taking as you catch sight of something over his shoulder.

Luffy looks up too.

There’s another sprig of mistletoe dangling from under the mast, metres high above your head.

“Don’t,” you say, before Luffy can react, “eat it this time.”

#op y/n secret santa #one piece x reader #monkey d. luffy x reader #luffy x reader #one piece #one piece x you #one piece.#luffy.#gift.#blorbo exchange.#long post #( i rly hope you like this #i also couldn't gift it to you on ao3 )

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