wwowooohhWHAT THE HELL!!!!! I LOOK JUST LIKE JOHN !!!!!!! i look like a BOY whats HAPPENING….!!!

Payback's a Murder

Word Count: 2k Description: Mammon may be the Avatar of Greed and may constantly try to con his brothers, but others who try to do the same will find themselves at the wrong end of his murder. Part of the A Demon's Nature series. Finally got back to this, so here we go with Mammon's turn! Note: Mulciber is a demon mentioned in John Milton's Paradise Lost. He served under Mammon and was an architect. Can also be found on AO3 here. content warning: blood, body horror, torture via the sharp ends of birds

The Avatar of Greed often found himself in trouble, whether it be because he stole personal belongings to sell or tried to cheat someone out of cash or … well, there were a lot of ways. Call him reckless, but when he saw an opportunity to make some cold, hard Grimm, he wasn’t about to pass it up!

But if someone tried to cheat him out of something? That wouldn’t do. Few dared to try it if they knew just who they were dealing with, but that didn’t stop some from trying anyway. They always regretted it afterwards.

The real issue, however, was if someone tried to cheat his brothers out of something. After all, he was the only one allowed to rip them off (that was his justification, anyway). The moment he finds out someone else tried to play confidence demon with any of them, it was a one-way ticket to the Great Mammon’s Beatdown Extravaganza.

He was walking by Leviathan’s room earlier when he heard a loud crash, some swearing, and a slight rumble under his feet. After some door breaking, tackling, and forcing his hotheaded brother to not summon Lotan, he found out what had made him so upset. Apparently, there was some demon running around with elaborate schemes swindling others -- well, nerds -- out of their money. He went on to explain something that Mammon did not at all understand -- as was usual when he got into his otaku rambling. If his brother had not been so upset, Mammon would have commended the guy for knowing how to target and hit a jackpot.

After some additional pestering, Mammon managed to get a rough description of this third-rate demon and realized he had a pretty good idea of just who it was. It was someone far closer to him than he’d like to admit.

So now here he was, leaning against the bar at one of the Devildom’s many clubs, drink in hand as he monitors the floor. If he was right, he would see the other cozening demon somewhere here tonight, so now it was just a waiting game. As Lucifer had told him repeatedly, You have to show that you’re Number Two. He planned to make that very clear tonight.

He felt the pulse of the bass vibrating through his body as the DJ amped up their music, more and more demons flowing into the space as the prime clubbing hours arrived. A few who noticed Mammon acknowledged his presence, some whispering about how he seemed to look way more serious than normal. The Avatar of Greed, not partying the night away already? Strange.

His patience was just about to run out when he caught a glimpse of just the demon he was seeking out. Hair as orange as a flame, he wasn’t too hard to spot amongst the crowd of more muted succubi surrounding him. Mammon downed the rest of his drink in one go, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his jacket as he made his way to his target.

“Mulciber. Already getting started, huh?”

“M-Mammon?!” He seemed startled to see the other, but cleared his throat as he regained his cool composure. “It’s good to see you, man! Why don’t you join us all for a drink?” The succubi around him giggled, one daring to lean towards Mammon in an attempt to latch onto his arm, but he quickly placed a hand up to stop her.

“No touchin’, sweetheart.” He shot her a look that made her immediately back away, a pout on her lips. “And that’s a nice offer, Mulcey, but I was hopin’ I could talk to ya real quick in private.”

Mulciber could tell that no was not an option in this conversation, given the serious look in the Avatar’s eyes. “Oh, uh, sure. Sorry ladies, I’ll be back soon. Gotta take care of business!” He gave them a wink as they continued on to the table for their party. Clearing his throat again, he turned back to his superior. “So, what’s shaking, boss?”

Mammon just gave him a smile before nodding his head towards a side door, motioning to accompany him there. The lesser demon complied, following him outside to a side alley. The night air was brisk, causing a shudder to run through Mulciber’s spine. At least, he hoped it was the weather that was making him feel like this …

“I heard ya got up to another scheme.” Mammon fiddled with a lighter, flipping the top off and on with his thumb and a jerk of his hand as he spoke. Click, click, click, click. “Wanna tell me about it?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, totally!” Mulciber nervously replied, wondering why Mammon seemed so interested. Did he want a cut of the check? Fishing for ideas for his own next get-rich-quick scheme? Or --

Oh.

Oh no.

He suddenly remembered that one of the victims of his scheming had been the very Avatar of Envy. He hadn’t thought much of it at the time, delighting in the fact that he was even able to rip off a Greater Demon. Meant his plan had to be pretty genius, right? But now … now he was starting to realize that he may have just made a big mistake.

“Hm? Ya haven’t said a word, Mulcey-boy.” Mammon turned to face him, tucking the lighter into his pocket. He took a step towards the other, who immediately took a step back -- only to be met with a hard brick wall. “Or didja have a moment of realization?”

“L-Listen, Mammon, I’m sorry! I didn’t know at the time, I swear!” Mulciber brought both his hands up, as if that would stop the other from approaching him.

“Oh? ‘Cuz your face says differently, buddy.” He bared his fangs, the usual gradient in his eyes now glowing a furious gold. There’s a malicious grin on his face as he takes a step back, and then he begins to … whistle?

Mulciber does not like where this is going. He’s heard that tune before and it makes his hairs stand on end. “Look, man, please, I’ll do whatever I have to do to make it up to you!” There’s already desperation in his voice, which almost makes Mammon laugh.

“Glad to hear it. Then ya won’t have a problem with what’s about to happen next, yeah?”

It starts in the distance, a noise that made it feel as if your eardrums were being pierced by a thousand shards of glass. It grows louder and louder, closer and closer. An omen.

Mulciber shrinks against the wall, his grey eyes wide in fear. He knows running is pointless -- the other demon would quickly catch him, and leave him even worse for wear as repercussion. “P-please, Mammon, sir, don’t do this … “

“Didn’t you just say ya’d do whatever ya have to do?” Mammon shakes his head, his wings stretching out wide as if to entrap the lesser demon where he stood. “And you really think suddenly pullin’ out the formalities is gonna get ya any mercy here?”

The flapping of numerous wings now filled the air, a large murder of crows circling in the dark sky above. Their bone-chilling caws and cries rain down upon them as the birds eagerly await their master’s command.

Mammon lunged forward and grasped the other’s jaw, his claws digging into flesh as he brought his face threateningly close. “Pretty ballsy of you to think messin’ with any of us was the right move.” He growled, a rumble in his throat. “Looks like someone needs remindin’ of his place.”

“I-I wasn’t thinkin’ at the time! C’mon, you know how that is, don’t you? I was just thinking of making some big bucks, I didn’t mean to go and step out of line--” Mulciber frantically rambled, trying to ignore the searing pain he was feeling from Mammon’s grip.

“I’m sure that was the case, Mulcey, sure!” If it wasn’t for his mocking smile, the Avatar would have nearly sounded genuine. “But that doesn’t mean you can escape the consequences, ya’know?” He let out a tsk, watching as blood dripped from where he had pierced the other’s skin.

He let go of Mulciber, taking a few steps back as he shook his hand as if to clean it of the ichor. There was no denying the glee he was feeling from this -- it had been a while since he decided to flex his abilities and powers on another. Looking up to the sky, he whistled out another tune, causing the crows to descend.

“He’s all yours.” He commands them in a language only they could understand, and in a flash the black-feathered birds rush in to attack. Their squawks mix with Mulciber’s shrieks as they begin to peck at him with their beaks and scratch him with their claws. Mammon fishes out the lighter from his pocket once more, grabbing a cigarette from the box he had on him with his other hand. Leaning against the opposing alley wall, he lights up and takes a slow drag, watching as the flurry of feathers pulverize his inferior.

The crows tear at Mulciber’s flesh, their sharp beaks riddling his body with small cavities and painting him with his own blood. He continues to cry and scream, though it’s obvious he’s losing energy by the second as they grow weaker in intensity, his body slumping towards the ground. Perhaps he had learned his lesson? Surely, he’s just waiting for it all to stop now, right?

Mammon takes a glance around, humming in delight as he catches sight of a discarded iron pipe. He drops the remains of his cigarette to the ground, stomping it out before retrieving his now makeshift weapon. It feels cool and light in his hand, and he gives it a small toss in the air before catching it again with a satisfied smile.

“Alright, alright. You all can leave him alone now.” Mammon commands his murder once more, followed by another whistle to let them know they could go back to doing whatever they were doing before now. One of them flew over to Mammon, perching on the metal rod in his hand, looking up at him with a puffed up chest in pride as blood stained its beak.

“Yes, who’s my good lil’ birdie?” Mammon cooed, scratching the crow under its chin. “Go get yerself cleaned up, okay?” It cawed in delight before flying off to join the rest, who were fading back into the dark night sky. The Avatar of Greed shook his head fondly before turning his attention back to the matter at hand.

Mulciber lay crumpled on the ground, though was making efforts to sit upright as he gasped for breath. His body hurt all over, as if every inch of him had been pierced with needles. He feebly looked up to meet Mammon’s gaze, a whimper leaving him as he noticed the rod in his hand.

“What? I couldn’t let my birds have all the fun, now could I?” Mammon grasped the rod firmly in both hands before swinging it down with a deafening crack as it hit the other, who let out another sharp cry of pain.

“Hm, perhaps just another for good measure.” Whack. Another wail.

“Okay, okay. One more.” Whack. Another splatter of blood.

Content at the shuddering and sniveling mass that was left, Mammon kneeled down to get close to Mulciber’s ear, his next words full of menace. “Ya really should have stuck to the building business. Keep that in mind in the future, ‘kay?”

Mammon stood up and let the iron rod clatter to the ground, its hollowness ringing into the night. He made his way back inside to order another drink, ignoring the whispers and stares from the others in the club. It was doubtful that Mulciber would make an appearance here after what had happened for a while.

He knocked on the bar counter, getting the attention of the bartender. “Give me a glass of your finest whiskey. Put it on Mulciber’s tab.”

Chapter 11 - The Introduction

Losing My Religion Series Masterlist

Unprofessional Bard's Masterlist

Previous Chapter • Next Chapter

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female!Reader/OC

Warnings: Fluff, smut (just a good ol' handjob in a tub and implied smut) and a lil bit of angst/tense situations + uncomfortable talks/thoughts of pregnancy and trauma.

Summary: Unprepared for the consequences, the reader has to put up with two new arrivals, even though there's something off about them. Something more than just the shock of survival.

Word Count: 6.810

Author's Note: This chapter is set between April and July 2036, I apologise bc the reader is slowly turning into her own character, like Dolly's becoming an OC 😭 but yeah I love you all so much, thank you for reading my series 🥺💗

Enjoy!

"Well, well, what have we here."

The trio halted in their tracks as your voice echoed in the stables, your flashlight shining on them.

"Hey, Dolly," Ellie turned around, dying inside. Beside her was Cat and Jesse, turning around with pursed lips. "What'cha doin'?"

"Oh not much- patrol, you know," You said nonchalantly, walking towards them with threatening steps as you did. "Making sure people don't sneak off in the middle of the night with the horses. Kinda like what you three are doing."

"We weren't sneaking off," Jesse chuckled, but the panic in his voice gave him away easily. "We're just here to... feed the horses?"

"They're being fed regularly, you know that, so cut the crap." You spoke sternly. "Where the hell are you all off to?"

"We were just-" Ellie took over. "We're meeting with Dina. Eugene is there with her."

"What for?" You inquired. "What does Eugene have to do with whatever it is you're planning?"

They were struggling to reveal the truth, but Ellie knew better than to lie. She knew that, as long as it was the truth you wouldn't get angry; it was your thing and Ellie had noticed it from the Boston QZ, so she gave a look to Cat, whom you suspected to be Ellie's girlfriend, and she spoke: "Eugene has weed."

"Ex-cuse me?" Your eyes widened with a long blink at the three words. You weren't against it or anything, but you were just shocked- How and where in hell did Eugene find weed?

"Yeah, shit- Uh, we'll head back," Jesse mumbled.

"No it's-" You quickly recovered and fixed your posture. "How?"

"We were going to find out," Cat offered an apologetic smile.

"Christ," You chuckled. "Oh, Eugene, Eugene..." You quickly look around, a devilish smirk spreading across your face. "You know what? Go."

"Are you serious?" Ellie asked in disbelief.

"Yeah. I'm not gonna rob you bunch from your teenage years," You chuckled. "Under one condition: I'll ride with you all."

"Oh, okay," Cat grinned excitedly and proceeded to climb on a horse, Jesse mirroring her actions after he offered his thanks.

"Okay," You pointed at the rifle you had in your hands after climbing on a horse. "Let's ride quick, I'm probably gonna get in a lot of trouble as it is, so..."

"Thanks, Dolly," Ellie spoke after she settled behind Cat.

If Eugene wasn't there, you wouldn't have let them out and would've proceed to fetch anyone who was already outside. You knew they could handle themselves, but you just didn't want anything to happen to them. It had just finished raining so it was extremely dark outside. After the quiet and fast ride, you saw them off into the partly wrecked building.

"If it's legit, we'll bring you some." Jesse smirked after the girls waved goodbye and walked in.

"Go on, get!" You chuckled and shooed at him, then began riding back the way you came while ignoring the offer, which was actually quite enticing.

It was near dawn when you heard a bunch of horses riding at full speed, nearing your position. The sky was turning a bright shade of blue, and you couldn't deny the beautiful scene in front of you. The air smelled of earth and remnants of rain from a few hours ago and there were the occasional chirping of birds and a squirrel here and there - the peace however was gone the moment the horses appeared. You immediately shot up from your place to see what was going on, shoulder aching a little whenever you gripped your rifle (the bullet which had teared its way into your flesh right before your showdown with Axel, although healed for the most part, still hurt).

You let out a relieved sigh when you recognised Ellie's red hair and Eugene's white ones, then you saw Dina and Jesse, but there were two other people you didn't know riding with them. You blinked a couple of times after you lowered your rifle, then shouted down to Cedric: "Open the gate!"

You made your way down and immediately went over to Eugene and the strangers, hand on your rifle just in case: "Hey, what's going on?"

"Cedric, take them to Kat, have her take a look at their wounds," Eugene instructed and he immediately obliged. After they disappeared and the kids went to put their horses in the stables, he spoke: "We were on our way back here when we heard shouting, found this couple fighting for their lives against a dozen infected in the woods. We took them down easily and offered them help afterwards... They're a bit freaked out, but they'll be okay."

"Okay, I'll let Ma-" You suddenly stopped, realisation dawning on you. "How the hell are we gonna tell Maria?"

Eugene looked deep in thought for half a minute, then spoke: "Tell her it was me and Dina. We were patrolling anyways-"

"What about the couple?"

"We'll ask them to say it was just the two of us, and to decrease the number of infected, problem solved. Relax, will ya?"

You nodded quickly, then walked off after telling him to alert the kids about the plan.

You stopped by the infirmary first. Daisy and a new medic, Angie, were tending to them and Cedric was standing guard while Kat wasn't present. You walked up to your patrol partner and tapped his shoulder: "You can go now, I'll take over from here."

"Sure," He shrugged, yawned, then waved goodbye. You slowly approached the beds the pair were sitting on, opposite each other, the grip on your rifle strong.

"How are you two holding up?" You said awkwardly, making them look between themselves before the woman spoke.

"We'll be okay... Thanks for helping us."

"Right- sure," You sighed quietly. "Could I ask for your names?"

The young woman looked at her partner once more, as if asking for permission, then looked back at you: "I'm Kiki... This is my husband Ward."

You nodded and offered a simple nice to meet you, but didn't give your name to them. Instead, you turned to Daisy: "Let me know when you're finished."

She nodded and proceeded with her stitches before you left the room. You weren't the one to judge people right off the bat, especially in the apocalypse. A lot of newcomers (including you) came here looking bewildered and drained because they were either almost eaten by a pack of infected or murdered by bandits, simple as that.

Ward was a brunette with a dark stubble, thicker than Joel's and had short, black hair. His nose was large but suited the rest of his face just fine, with big, dark brown eyes. A scar ran over the crook of his nose down his cheek and he looked hardened, just like everyone else. Kiki, on the other hand, was also a brunette, but her features weren't as sharp as Ward's, or she was just much younger than him. She had long, black hair and her eyes matched the colour; she was also smaller than Ward, with a petite figure. She was very beautiful, too and looked frightened rather than hardened.

Around ten minutes later, Daisy walked out: "Angie's finishing up, but I'm done. I'm heading over to check on other patients, if you need me I'll be there."

"Okay," You nodded and walked back inside. The couple was neatly patched up and sitting quietly, eyes wide. When you walked in, Kiki jumped, but relaxed the same moment she saw your face. "Must've been through a lot, you two..."

"You could say that-" Kiki murmured, then looked over to Ward, who didn't seem to take notice of he conversation. There was a gash on his chin and he was squeezing the hell out of the bed sheets as Angie worked on the wound. He didn't make a single sound, but the nurse looked a little distressed. "Do you-" Kiki abruptly asked. "Do you run things around here?"

"Uh- No," You turned your head towards her, your grip on your rifle never faltering once. "No, I'm sort of responsible for the security. The boss lady will be here soon."

"Lady?" Kiki looked genuinely confused.

"Yes." You offered a simple nod. "I'm gonna ask something of you both. Don't worry, it's something simple."

Ward immediately intervened before Kiki could open her mouth: "What?"

"Relax," You warned, keeping your eye on him. "Angie, could you give us a minute?"

"Of course, I'm done anyways," She practically threw the equipments onto the small table next to the bed, took off her latex gloves, tossed them into the trash and ran out.

You gave Ward a hardened look, then spoke, walking between their beds, keeping them in your vision: "When the boss comes here, she's going to ask you a few questions... I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk about the kids' being there when they found you."

"Why?" Kiki asked, worried.

"Well, they weren't supposed to be outside- Except for the girl with long, black hair and the man who brought you here. It'd save us a lot of trouble if you didn't mention them."

"So, what, you expect us to lie?" Ward huffed.

"No." You spoke coldly, rivaling his hostile tone. "I'm simply asking you to leave out the part where there were 4 kids- There was just one. Besides, she may not even ask about it."

Your staring contest with Ward ended when, as if on cue, Maria, Tommy and Eugene entered the room. You saw the fright in Kiki's eyes, so you spoke calmly: "Hey, it's okay. That's her, the boss lady- and her husband."

"Boss lady?" Tommy chuckled and stood next to you, Maria and Eugene mirroring him.

"It's okay," Maria spoke: "We got this, you can go now."

You nodded once and reluctantly walked out from the room. Stepping outside the infirmary, you came across Cedric waiting by the entrance. You shook your head towards the gates with a simple: "Let's go."

Cedric was almost 15 years younger than you, had even younger features than someone would have in their 30s. He had chin length, dirty blonde hair with hazel eyes fleeing to green. He was a calm and collected person, unlike most people in Jackson. Your tactics and strategical thinking were similar, which made patrol much more effective and easy.

Both of your shifts ended around two hours later, when the sun was up completely and shining down on the streets, calling people to duty; it was, however, your call to hit the bed. After turning over your weapons and heading your separate ways with Cedric, you walked over to your house, a smile spreading across your face at the thought of seeing Joel.

You hadn't seen each other in almost three days due to different shifts but, with the weekend off, you could finally rest in your husband's arms.

You quietly entered the house and tiptoed up the stairs. The bedroom door was closed, he was obviously still asleep. Normally, he'd be awake by 7AM, but lately he'd been really hard on himself with patrols- it was only right he treated himself to a few extra hours of sleep. You really wanted to crawl next to him, or just take a small peak inside the room to see him, but you knew better. He awoke to the slightest creak of the bed when you got up, or simply turned to drink some water. You wanted him to rest though, that came first, so you used the bathroom outside your room to get cleaned up, then moved into the bathtub to treat yourself. It had been a while since you let your muscles rest and relax in the deliciously hot water.

Not even five minutes later after you settled in the warmth, you heard the slow opening of the door. You opened your eyes to find Joel with nothing but his boxer briefs on, heart beating with ecstasy and joy at seeing him in his sleepy state: "Hey," You giggled. "Morning handsome."

"Mornin' baby," He rubbed the corner of his eyes with the back of his hand.

"I didn't wake you, did I?"

"Would you believe me if I said no?" He smirked as he proceeded to take off his underwear.

"Probably not," You smiled apologetically, he'd quite possibly woken to the sound of the water filling. You extended both of your arms to him, calling him to your embrace while stretching and yawning: "Come here, I missed you."

The words made Joel stop in his tracks for a short moment, heart wearming at them, then walked over to the tub with his naked glory: "Scoot."

You simply leaned back and parted your legs, offering him to lay against you. He obliged, got in and sat, making the water level rise when he laid down against your chest. Your left arm rested on his chest, partly hugging him, while your right hand went through his hair. You gave him a kiss on his neck, a lovely kiss which made him sigh contentedly: "M-hm, I missed you too. Missed this..."

You wanted to stay like that forever: Caressing his hair and the occasional, soft kisses against his jaw, cheek and neck which made his heart melt. You could sense that this small gesture made him very happy, which in turn made you hug him tightly.

"What do you say we..." You purred into his ear. "Ditch the dinner plans for tonight, hm?"

His eyes were closed when he spoke: "Why? Got somethin' else in that pretty little mind of yours?"

"Yeah," You confirmed, running your hand up and down his chest. "We could do something, just the two of us."

"Like...?"

"Hmm, like movie night? Or you can play me something?"

"Only if you sing." He grinned.

"Nope, scratch that," You chuckled and shifted under him a little. "Or we can just... You know, fuck." He coughed out a laugh at your bluntness. "What? You don't want to?"

"I didn't say that," He turned a little and looked up into your eyes with a brilliant smile. "I'd love nothing more, actually, but these are Jesse's parents." You sighed, disappointed, saying I know, I know. "We have two days to ourselves, (Y/N)- You can have me all to yourself, except for a few hours."

"Fine," You growled jokingly, smiled and kissed his lips softly.

What was intended to be a simple kiss now slowly moved in the direction of a filthy make-out session, his tongue parting your lips with ease and meeting yours. Joel grabbed your calf and caressed it slowly, while you took advantage of his distraction and sneaked a hand down his abdomen.

You shifted a little more to the side and took his cock in hand, which made him sigh and drop his head on your shoulder: "(Y/N)..."

"Hmm?" You hummed with a smile when your thumb pressed on his slit, making him hiss and become harder. "Let me take care of you, huh?"

You watched Joel's brows drawing together when you slowly started to pump him. You kissed the pulse on his neck, then moved down to his collarbone. His grip on your leg was more solid the firmer you worked his length, and he jumped ever so slightly when you bit down on his collarbone. His erection grew bigger by the second all the while you sucked and bit a small hickey on his skin.

"Shit..." He shifted in the water, pulling himself upwards so that you didn't have trouble reaching for his shaft.

"You want me to go faster?" You whispered and kissed his shoulder. He nodded but didn't speak and let you work your magic.

You picked up pace, flicking your wrist and focusing on the underside of his head, making him groan broken, unclear profanities. After a while, you felt him tense under your touch, his breathing turning a little laboured.

"(Y/N)..." He sighed through gritted teeth, letting you have your way with him.

"That's it..." You cooed and continued kissing him. Soon, he let out a loud groan and came, making you moan quietly.

Seeing Joel like this -relaxed and euphoric- was always a treat, moments like this where it was just the two of you; no infected, no survival, no bullshit from tha past. You were aware of how it was a luxury to do the things you were able to do: Taking a hot bath, finding someone you loved and marrying them, sleeping on a bed with clean sheets without worrying if infected or bandits were going to jump you.

You were grateful, you were reminded of this everyday, but it took its toll on you, too.

A lot of people, innocent kids were out there, suffering- dying, surviving... You wished you had the power to help them all and rebuild, but you were aware of how dangerous it was out there. It was simply too risky to leave Jackson. You weren't some superhero, after all.

Not a hero...

"What's got you thinkin'?" Joel snapped you out of your thoughts, his fingers ever so gently tracing your cheekbone as you laid on the bed across each other. It was night-time, after dinner with Jesse and his parents and, of course, a round of much needed love making. You both were a little sleepy, definitely content with sweat covering your bodies like a thin layer of blanket.

You looked into his eyes from where your head was -which was on the crook of your elbow, resting on your pillow- and gave him a phantom of a smile, nodding slightly: "Nothing in particular. You?"

"You," He smiled, which made you chuckle. Convincing Joel that you were absolutely, 100% okay was getting trickier as he'd spent just enough time to sense a depressive episode's approach; you didn't want to burden him with your self-doubt and self-loathing, as you hated it when his mood shifted for the worse because of you. "Wonderin' what goes on in that head of yours."

"Wish I knew that myself," You grabbed his hand which was tracing the left side of your face, then turned the back of it for a kiss.

You knew, though. While you and Joel were helping with the dishes in the kitchen, Jesse's mother, Robin had asked if you were planning on having any children. The question you'd been dying to avoid had finally been asked, which made you drop the plate you had in your hand into the sink. It truly was an off-guard moment for you, which startled Joel, but luckily the topic was never brought up again after the plate in question shattered into pieces. You weren't sure if you wanted a child, not after the incident with Miles.

The moment when the contents of his skull splattering onto the ground while he was in your arms- under your supervision haunted you day and night. You never talked about it to anyone, and no one had asked, but it only intensified after your wedding. Because you knew what people had in their minds: Will we be seeing a Joel or Dolly Jr. running around?

You were fucking old, too, and so was Joel. Even if you didn't know whether you'd be able to carry due to that, there was no point in risking it either way, since I clearly suck at watching over kids.

"I think you do," He pushed himself closer to you and sneaked the hand against your mouth onto your waist, propping his arm up and putting his head against the palm of the other. "You just don't wanna talk about it. Which is okay, y'know." You nodded, smile growing a bit wider. "We've been over this before, but If you ever feel like- y'know... you're borin' me or something-"

"I know," You offered a full smile, pushing your thoughts away at the best of your ability. "I see you, Joel Miller," You then put a hand against his chest, where his heart should be: "I know you, you know me... You know what I think?"

He gave you a curious look, but it got replaced with something that hinted excitement when you ever so slowly pushed him on his back with the hand on his chest, then straddled his hips. Joel chuckled: "How is it that you still have this much energy after only four hours of sleep?"

The sleep in question took place after the 'mingling' in the bath. Warm April breeze, even warmer covers and warmest above all, Joel's body pressed against yours, both of your hairs wet and drying on their own as you slept in your lovers arms. He woke up after an hour or so, lingered there for awhile, just enjoying your presence by his side; he then quietly left you to sleep- lord knows you needed it.

"You're just getting old, baby," You giggled and leaned down to kiss him, his hands immediately going to your hips. "Not complaining, though."

An uneventful few weeks passed as Jackson entered the first week of June. Two losses in the town, but no new arrivals after Katie- Kiki and Ward. No raids as well, so overall it was calm.

After reporting in about the week in general, one evening, Maria asked you to stay behind: "It's time for Ward and Katie to go through the test," She declared. "We gotta see if they're fit for patrol or not."

"You got it. When?"

"Tomorrow. I already notified them, we'll meet at the northern training post-"

"We who?" You ran a hand through your hair.

"You and me. Robert and Eugene were supposed to be there originally, but they'll be off hunting." She explained and you nodded. Without further ado, you walked out and made your way back home.

The next morning, Joel accompanied you to the training post. Normally it was your day off with him, but training awaited. The weather was particularly hot for an early morning, so it came to you as a little shock when you saw Kiki, who was wearing a rather thick looking blouse. You didn't question it of course, but it made you think.

"Alright," You cleared your throat, after a quick greeting, stepping into the open training area. Joel and Maria remained inside, arranging the medical needs list while keeping an eye on you three. "I'm gonna put you two through a little test. Maria tells me you decided to stay here in Jackson, so we need to decide which duties you're fit for."

Ward remained incredibly still while Kiki nodded. Her hands were resting between her knees, while Ward had his arms crossed. They were sitting on a bench under the shade: "It's going to get a little physical, but I assure you I'm not going to hurt either of you." You turned around and walked over to the middle of the area: "Right, let's start with you, Kiki."

She gave a panicked look to Ward, but he just nodded with a thoughtful frown, rather than a permitting glare. Over the weeks they had been in Jackson, people sort of got used to their non-verbal interactions, even though some people found it suspicious. She got up and made her way over to you and, by the look on her face, regretted her outfit of choice as she tried to loosen the collar.

"If you want to stop- at any moment, let me know," You reassured her. She nodded, went to roll her sleeves up, but stopped immediately. You acted like you didn't see it, then proceeded to get in stance and lift your hands up: "Okay, let's start with something simple. Show me your stance."

She gave you a blank stare: "My what?"

"Your... stance, you know, fighting stance?"

"I don't have one," She simply shrugged.

"Okay," You sighed quietly. "Then show me how you punch."

She threw what could've been a proper punch but it was weak, you immediately caught her fist in your palm. She panicked and pulled back, and you immediately let go. You glanced at Ward, who seemed to be on high alert.

"Again," You got into stance and she obliged, throwing another weak punch your way. Her stance was there, actually, and her punches came through like she knew what she was doing, but the impact wasn't effective.

It went on a couple more punches, which you caught in your hand each time, until she spoke: "Why do you do that?"

"What?" You lowered your hands.

"You keep holding my hands," It was as if she was more annoyed than confused. "Can you not do that?"

"It's a reflex-" You explained, glanced at Ward again, then looked back at her. "I do it with everyone I train, but if you don't want me to then it's fine."

Not everyone, only the ones with punches as slow, weak and predictable as hers.

"Okay, now let's try some... combos," You added and got in a more secure stance. "Throw one punch after another. Fast and hard. Don't hold back."

"I'm not holding back," She grunted and did a typical boxing combo, which, generally, only people trained in boxing knew- but her punches were still weak. You remained quiet and let her go at it for a few rounds.

You suddenly took a step back, raised your hand up to the same level as your face and spoke: "Kick."

Instead, she went to kick you between your legs. A rush of panic and years of reflexes kicked in and you caught her feet between your knees. You looked up with a what the fuck was that? expression on your face and waved your hand in the air: "I meant here."

"We're fighting, right? We need to be unpredictable," She said with a tone of... irritation? Was she snickering?

"Do I look like a bandit to you?" You let go of her leg, giving her a displeased look.

"You did say you wanted to see what we were capable of."

Where was this sudden confidence coming from all of a sudden?

She was always a little weird with you. Not that you saw her too often but the moments when you two were together, one minute she'd look like she wanted to be your friend (which was when Joel was around), other times she'd remind you of a cruel, rank-wise superior back in the Boston QZ (which was when Joel wasn't around).

You gave her a hard look: "Alright. Let's see how you're gonna do when someone's actually fighting you, then."

Her expression went from somewhat cocky to seriousness as you took a few steps foward and towered over her. Your instructions were simple and clear when you spoke: "I'm gonna put you in a lock. Wriggle out of it."

You slowly grabbed her wrist, giving her time to get ready and process what you were doing. Then, you twisted her arm carefully around her waist and turned her around, pressing her arm on her back, only for her to suddenly squeal: "Okay! Enough!"

You quickly took a step back, startled at her reaction, you weren't even applying the slightest pressure. Ward suddenly shot up from where he was sitting and yelled: "What did you do to her?"

"I didn't do anything!" You frowned.

"It's okay!" Kiki suddenly stepped in front of Ward who was advancing your way. "I panicked, she didn't-"

"Woah there," You suddenly heard Joel and Maria approach the field. Confusion was superior to your anger at that moment: Had you really hurt her?

"Calm down," Maria put her hands on her hips. "She specifically warned you that she wouldn't hurt you under any circumstances. Relax."

You gave Maria a grateful look as he defended you: "I didn't even apply pressure- Look, no one's here to hurt you on purpose."

Ward and Kiki stared into each other's eyes, and by all means it was not a romantic moment, then the bigger of the two finally groaned: "I think she's had enough. For today."

"You think?" You unintentionally slipped it out, but the companions by your side seemed to agree with what you were getting at. "Do you want to stop Kiki?"

"Um," She looked at the three of you, chewing on her bottom lip, then answered quietly after a tense moment of silence: "Yeah, I think I should stop."

"Fine," You said, trying to keep your voice as netural as possible. "Let's continue with you then, Ward." Before anyone could say anything, you and the man you challenged found yourselves back on the middle of the combat area. "Show me your stance and let's begin."

He did as you asked but didn't wait for you to size him up, throwing a punch into your palm as soon as you lifted it, startling your audience. That didn't stop either of you from starting off with a much quicker and a harsher routine, which seemed to have everyone on edge.

You didn't counter once, but it was as if he was forcing you out of the defensive with his strikes, not to mention he was forcing you to step out of the area.

"What the hell's goin' on?" Tommy half jogged over to where the three were standing, watching you two roll from a snowball into an avalanche. Ward was grunting with each hit missed, anger taking over his features, while you kept your cool. It was as if he was riling himself up because he couldn't land a punch - his aim was messy and unstable, which was nothing compared to your years of disciplinary training.

"Okay, I think you've proved your point, Ward." Maria spoke loudly after Tommy's sudden entrance, but he didn't seem to hear her.

"I agree," You grunted and dodged a rather heavy looking punch, rolled over behind him and got up immediately; before you could say anything else, thinking he had stopped, you momentarily let your guard down. Everybody seemed to have thought the same, but what none of you saw coming was the exceptionally hard blow on your nose.

"What the fuck?!" You heard someone, weren't sure who, yell as you saw a blur of people rushing toward you when you stumbled backwards, hands wrapping around your possibly broken nose with a brief shout.

Giving into your anger, before anyone can get a grip of what you were doing, you launched yourself at Ward: "Son of a-" You grabbed the collar of his shirt and headbutted him: "Bitch!"

It was beyond everyone just how fast you had moved, broke his nose with an equally strong strike and had him falling on his arse. Kiki rushed to his husband's side, Maria to yours while Tommy kept Joel from ripping Ward to shreds. You were sure you were going to pass out when Maria got a hold of you, feeling as if you were under water with the blurring of your vision and hearing. The adrenaline rush in your veins kept you from losing consciousness, though.

"(Y/N)?" Maria's voice got clearer each passing second as you chased the lingering faint away from your mind, finally opening your eyes completely to see a displeased face. "(Y/N) are you okay?"

"Yeah," You sighed, whipping your hands in the air around your waist to shake off the droplets of blood from your bleeding nose as best as you could, tears at the corners of your eyes. "Just fine and dandy."

You felt the familiar, calloused hands of Joel gently hold your elbows as Maria turned around to see to Ward: "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, Joel," You nodded and wiped the blood on your white t-shirt in a pissed, exhausted manner.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" You heard Maria growl at Ward, who was still shaken and sitting on the ground, face looking about the same as yours. "You can't just come up and punch people because you got angry at them! This is Jackson: You're not outside, and she isn't your enemy."

"It's okay- I'm sorry Maria- He's a little, uh," Kiki whined on her knees where she had knelt, but went quiet when he looked behind her to see you and Joel.

"You're not his mother, Katie," The blonde spoke, more calm now but no less strict. "He can speak for himself, and the same goes for you."

There was an intense moment between the three, while Tommy nodded at what Maria had said, his hands on his hips, looking at them disapprovingly: "Alright, c'mon, let's get you to a doc."

Joel in the meanwhile, like a mother duck, studied your nose and held a piece of cloth against the bleeding. He kept you focused on him while Maria and Tommy handled the other couple: "Fuckin' bastard..."

You chuckled at the way he grumbled as he wiped the blood off your nose gently: "Got what he was asking for though, don't go around wanting to kick his ass."

"Yeah, that was a pretty damn good hit..." He spoke, but his voice faded into the background when you curiously looked over to see what was going on, only to come across Kiki's face first things first. What you saw on her face sent a shiver down your spine.

Anger.

Not because you hurt Ward though, no. It was more than that.

It was jealousy.

You knew both because you had spent enough time with her to understand what that look meant, and her expression wasn't hard: It was soft, a certain yearning spread across her features as her eyes went back and forth between you and Joel. You couldn't tell what irked you the most: The way she looked at you, or him. You seemed to add more to her anger, while when she stared at your husband (and stared at him longer), there was longing and confusion.

The moment you made eye contact, she immediately turned around and scurried off, leaving you two and Maria alone.

"Hm? Dolly?" You heard Joel again once you brushed off the odd stare you got from Kiki.

"What?" You gave him a puzzled look.

"I asked if you wanted to have this looked at," He repeated in a soft voice. Most of the time, with small scratches or wounds which didn't need stitches or weren't cut too deep to get an infection or anything, you preferred handling it on your own to not waste the town's medical supplies.

"No, I got it," You nodded quickly and took a step back, feeling your nose while Maria approached you both.

"What the hell was that, (Y/N)?" She had her hands on her hips as well.

"I don't know, Maria," You emphasised each word, making your discomfort and irritation show. "...I have a few ideas though."

You moved inside, away from the burning sun and began discussing your first impression.

"So, what do you think?" Maria asked from behind her desk. Two pairs of eyes watched you quietly as you sat up on your chair, still holding the cloth up to your nose.

"Well, they're definitely not military, I can tell you that much. They don't know the first thing about combat - Kiki doesn't, anyway." Something's not right with them, you wanted to say, but decided to keep it to yourself for the time being and continued: "She's weak, can't even throw a punch. Almost lost her shit when I put her into that lock- I couldn't even put her into the lock, she just screamed."

"Yeah, what was up with that?" Maria asked but didn't demand an answer, it was more like a rhetorical question. You explained how she also went out of the training routine and tried to kick you, but again, it was weak.

"It's actually not that she's weak, but more like she's holding back," You said thoughtfully after a moment of silence.

"How do you mean?" Joel spoke for the first time.

"I mean, you can feel that she's holding back on purpose." Much as you hated your years in FEDRA, your experience with training and being trained came in handy on a daily basis - as much as you hated it, you were also grateful. "While Ward, on the other hand," You shifted in your seat, annoyed, "Fights like a feral beast, and I can tell that wasn't his full potential."

Joel growled quietly and crossed his arms. You then continued with your observation: "I don't want to be too quick on my judgement, but there's something not right with them."

Tommy walked in at that moment: "Well, that was a shit show."

"What happened?"

"They argued the whole way," Tommy sighed and pulled a chair between you and Joel, then sat exactly the same way his brother was sitting. "It was... weird is one way to put it."

"Let's keep them under supervision for awhile," You offered.

"You're volunteering?" Maria raised a brow.

"Hell no, not after that anyway. My existence would just antagonise them."

"What are you suggestin'?" Tommy turned to you.

"Put them through another training session with Walt, he'll know what I'm talking about... And Eugene found them, so maybe he'll be up for the task."

A moment of quiet and glances were exchanged among the family, then Maria cleared her throat: "Fine, we'll see what the other's think of that and vote for it."

"Okay. Now if you'll excuse me..." You murmured and got up, walking out of the room absentmindedly, deep in thought. A headache settled to the front of your head and you felt fatigue take over as soon as you stepped outside, while you left the other Millers confused.

"Hey," You heard Joel's soft voice from behind you not much later, which made you stop in your place and turn around. You gave him a blank stare, the cloth holding hand dropping to your side to reveal the smeared, dried blood around your nose. Without any rush, he walked over to you with a worried look and stood right in front of you.

After gazing into each other's eyes fro a while, Joel no doubt searching yours to understand what was going on and you just finding comfort in his, he slowly took your empty hand in his. With a soft tilt of his head in the direction of your house, you blinked once in acknowledgement and started walking with him.

Your anger and irritation started dissipating the more you walked like that, hand in hand and in silence, but your headache and slowly worsening mood, the taste of blood on your tongue remained. Not many words needed to be said with Joel, he knew what you needed by just one look. You were sure if Kurt saw you like that, he would laugh until his lungs couldn't take it: Look at you! Although the thought made your heart warm, it wasn't enough to lift the corners of your lips. You unconsciously held onto Joel's hand tighter as you walked to your house, and he returned the gesture, a simple gesture- an assurance that let you know he had you.

Once you stepped inside and he closed the door while you stood in the hallway, he walked up to you and held your shoulders and gave you a soft, still concerned look. You looked up at him with a soft sigh through your nose some seconds later, and finally spoke: "I'm gonna... I'm gonna go lay down a little."

"Okay," Joel gave you a reassuring smile and placed a kiss on your forehead. "You let me know if you need anything."

"Of course," You smiled back, a lifeless, small but an equally reassuring smile. Joel watched you climb up the stairs slowly, thinking about how long it would take you to feel better while also thinking of how he could make you feel at ease during the time.

His fears were similar to yours: He didn't want you to feel responsible or upset because of his own self-doubt and self-loathing, and he hated having you show all the effort to make him feel better about himself, about the things he had done. You kept assuring him that that was what being partners was all about, that you do what you do for him gladly and would continue doing it for as long as you were able (which meant as long as you were alive). He was glad to have you by his side, but of course didn't rely on you as if you were a rehabilitation centre, and it went both ways.

While thinking about all of this, with a cup of coffee in hand and sitting on his porch, his ears perked up at the round of laughter coming from behind the house. It was then, when he came up with a plan to make you feel better, even in the slightest.

Ellie.

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tags: @spideysimpossiblegirl

Cherry Vodka [Part I] | Richie T. + Eddie K.

Pairing: Richie Tozier x Reader x Eddie Kaspbrak (21+)

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: language, nsfw material but no explicit sex (yet), alcohol, polyamory mention, kind of a modern au too

Anon said:  “ okay so based off that art you reblogged of the richie x bev x eddie, what about like a reader x richie x eddie fluffy smut based off that (i hope that makes sense bahahha)”

A/n: Yeah, I had to split it in two parts because 7k words... I’m sorry it took me so long to post it, dear anon, if you’re still outta there. I rewrote and changed the plot of this one three times and it’s inspired by this post and by the song Sleep Apnea by Beach Fossils, by the way.

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“Richie…” “What, doll?” You felt his hand trailing down the small of your back, slowly and treacherously. 

You rolled your eyes from your book to meet Richie’s little smirk. He had his black wayfarers on, even though the sun was down in the horizon now, and behind those you knew his eyes have been glazing all over you. He was all careless laying on his side right next to you on the towel, unruly wind-dried curly hair, head up resting on a hand, the other free one teasing you because he just couldn’t help it when you’d put on that black high-cut swimsuit of yours. Eddie shared the curly-haired boy thoughts but, on the other hand, he laid peacefully flat on his back by your right side. Arms resting under his head, eyes closed, but here and there he’d peek at your and Richie’s constant bickering. You, laying on your stomach in between them, were still in your swimsuit from earlier. After lunch, it was Richie’s idea to go to this lake nearby by his parents' vacation house. It was also Richie’s idea to spend spring break there. Usually, your break trips would include their other friends, who ended up being your friends too over time, but that was being a harsh semester for quite everyone. With Bill and Stan stuck with their academic duties, the best idea was to drive to the Tozier’s vacation house in a small town in Pennsylvania. It was a simple, untouched, two-floor house. Richie told in the car his parents bought it when he was a teenager so they could travel and spend some time there, but ended up not doing that as much as they intended on once it was too far from his city. “For fuck’s sake, Richie!” Laughing was not what you intended, but you did it and you heard Eddie giggling behind you. Richie’s hand had finally made its way to your hips now, while he leaned closer. “Come on, toots. Just one kiss…” He whispered in his best charming tone, but you pushed him away, playing cool although you felt your cheeks burning, the known hots already hitting you like a truck. “No! Fuck off… I already told you we should stop doing this,” you muttered. “You always say that,” it was Eddie who reasoned, and you turned for him, eyes threatening him with no words while he shrugged. “Yeah, and I’m sticking to it,” you retorted. Indeed. It had been over a month since you last… Did what you did. “Plus I think Stan has been suspicious…” Richie snorted, “yeah, like lil old he would give a single fuck about it, y/n.” You breathed out, closing the book because now your concentration was ruined. Richie, Eddie, and you met at the creative writing class, 8 am on Tuesdays, your first semester of college. You remembered as it was today how you found them “lost” less than 10 feet away from the lecture hall but arguing like an old couple without realizing that. You helped them find the right way, and Richie flirted with you as you walked into the class, while Eddie scoffed at him for making them get lost and almost late. You knew those boys had been friends their entire life, but from that moment on the three of you became inseparable. If someone needed to find one of you on the campus, the other two would probably be found at the same place. The pureness of your friendship didn’t last long. It only lasted until the first party you went to together, when you lost to Richie at a snooker game and he claimed a kiss as his prize, the smooth motherfucker he was. You kissed him and only that, but ten minutes later you were making out in the bathroom. You made him swear he wouldn’t make things complicated between you two and he had been keeping his promise ever since. Eddie was a whole out of the curve story though. After what happened at said party, you noticed how fidgety he got about the matter of you and Richie been together once, although he did a great job hiding it. Took a while for him to leave it alone, but you didn’t. Something pestering inside wouldn’t let you. You were at his dorm, studying for a complicated final exam while the sky fell apart in rain outside when you asked him why he got upset. He denied to his death he had jealousy of you and Richie running through his veins, but you knew he was lying when his eyes started to avoid yours, saying ‘Richie’s a better ladies' man, anyway’. You shoot your shot without really thinking about it, told him ‘he was just as desirable as Richie’ and it seemed to light a spark between you two. You were the one who leaned closer but he closed the gap, nervously, pulling you into his lap as soon as you kissed him back, building up his confidence. Just like when Richie and you had your thing, you felt no need to hide from him what happened between you and Eddie. It was an embarrassing talk, but it worked. The three of you quickly and naturally warmed up to the facts: you were friends with benefits with both of them and there was nothing complicated about that for you. But you wanted to keep it low because casually making out with your best friends regularly here and there over time whenever you all desired to was none of people business. Eddie rolled over to lay on his stomach, just like you were, shoulder to shoulder. After a couple days constantly under the sun, you noticed he had more freckles than usual over his nose and cheeks, a few on his shoulders. “You’re being more uptight about it all than me, and everyone knows that being more uptight than me is a big deal...” His self depreciative statement made you flash a half-smile, but didn't stop you from leering at his soft lips because you remembered how he tasted like mint whenever you’d kiss. And it had been a long time since you did for the last time. “I’m just being cautious, Spagheddie.” He smiled at the silly nickname, just when you freed yourself from Richie’s grip, grabbed your book and got up, leaving them on the grass while you walked towards the backdoor. “Where ya’ goin’?” Richie called, but you didn’t look back. “Taking a shower!” You shouted. ‘I fucking need to cool down,’ you thought to yourself. In your silly head, about a year ago, this whole situation was a great idea. Now you found yourself utterly screwed. There was pining going on since the very first beginning in between you and them. You always knew it was there, you just didn’t expect it to escalate like it did. You thought once you had tasted from Richie and Eddie, you’d be done. Checked them out of your possibilities, life goes on, but now you were bonded to them in a way you never intended on. You fell for them. For both of them. And that was making you act up. Since your high school years you understood you were an afraid-of-commitment kind of person. No big deal, no attachments, no pain, so you weren’t ready to fall for a single person alone. Falling for two at the same time made your brain short circuit. You had debated the matter with yourself multiple times before. Since you became aware of it happening, you weren’t able to choose between them, you didn’t even know someone was capable of splitting their feelings like that. Your only solution was to stop it somehow. You couldn’t just leave them completely, so you decided to break the colorful side of that mess of a friendship. It wasn’t easy because it was not just about physical bonds. They were everywhere around you. Eddie would buy you coffee on the test mornings he knew you were tired after studying the whole night and hand it to you kissing your forehead. Richie would always hold your hand, keep you close and protect you somehow, doing that thing where he’d distractedly run his thumb over your knuckles. You knew that maybe you were not just an arousal let-out for them too and that made things even worse. You ruminated the facts the whole time you were under the cold water upstairs, and when you came down later, all damp hair and sleep clothes, you found them both in the kitchen, struggling with dinner although it was just frozen lasagna for three. Beach Fossils played from Richie’s phone, open vodka bottle on the wood table in the middle of the small kitchen. Richie was the one who first noticed you there, smiling over his shoulder. “Gonna leave you watching Eds so he doesn’t implode the house while I take a shower, doll. Help the poor man.” he said, walking past by you and running upstairs. “You’re talking like you weren’t the one struggling to turn on the oven!” Eddie shouted at him. You laughed just like Richie did at distance, joining Eddie by the stove. “Do you want a hand there?” “Never mind,” he said, closing the oven door with a proud grin, “it will be ready in twenty, I guess.” “Talented boys you two are!” you scoffed. “Oh shut up!” He faked a disgusted face at you. Your eyes laid over the cherries you bought the day you arrived, placed in a fruit basket on the counter and, while Eddie sat down at the table you grabbed a glass, the vodka, and a handful of cherries. He didn’t ask you what you were doing, but your peripheral sight allowed you to know he was keeping full attention on you while you fumbled around. You mashed the fruits in the glass until they were a reddish pasta, collecting the seeds and pouring alcohol over what lasted in there. As you swayed everything together, you remembered drinking it once, but not quite where was it. You gulped it turning around to finally face Eddie, and he was splayed in a chair, a ghost of a smile on. “The hell you doin’?” he asked lowly and you shrugged. “I don’t know… But it worked.” He raised his brows, getting up and walking towards you. “Yeah? Is it good?” You hummed in response, feeling it burn down your throat. In the deep of your mind, watching Eddie coming closer and closer, you knew what was about to happen, but you didn’t act fast enough against it. “Let me taste it” And he did. Not from the cup but straight from your lips. Eddie leaned in and kissed you softly, an arm around your waist while his free hand went for the back of your neck. And you ease in melting into him was embarrassing, leaving the cup onto the sink as soon as he pressed you against it before the glass ended up shattered on the floor. His tongue slid over yours, hands going to grab your hips, lifting your shirt a bit in the process. You instantly wished he took it off, already built up after spending that time alone in the middle of nowhere and with that aching tension all over the place. You had sex with Richie twice already over time, one of them a bit drunkenly, the other completely sober and thirsty for it, but you had never done it with Eddie. And you wanted it bad. Been wanting for a long time now, since that fucking rainy day in his dorm. But you knew you couldn’t, not when you shouldn’t even be kissing him like that after managing to stick up to your chastity for over a month now. So your hands palmed his chest and gently pulled him away. “Holy fuck…” Richie’s whispered voice made both you and Eddie startle. He was right there, at the kitchen entrance with a towel around his waist, mouth agape looking at both of you and you had no idea of how much time was standing there now. But he for sure saw shit happening. “That was the fucking fastest shower ever,” Eddie said, so casually it disturbed you. “N-no… I just came back to grab my phone.” Richie muttered. You froze, having no idea of how to move or what to say now. Yes, they were pretty aware you messed around with both of them, but one never saw the other in the act. Never, nor even a peck, and now Richie just witnessed a goddamn show. You were ready to tell him how you were sorry because you had just denied him a kiss when you were sunbathing outside and you have been constantly denying him for weeks now, but he didn’t give you the chance. Richie grabbed his phone over the table and stopped the music. You had the hint that maybe he wasn’t upset once he had that little mischievous smirk of his while he made his way out of there and upstairs again. Of course you didn’t talk about the matter over dinner, but Richie acted like nothing happened and Eddie just followed the lead completely unbothered. You tried to go on as naturally as they did, but something about Richie’s furtive looks over you made you think he was definitely not cool about catching you and Eddie together in the kitchen. You just couldn’t tell if either he was jealous or whatever was that and it pinched you from the inside the rest of the night while you watched old TV shows reprising until it was past one in the morning. That was when Eddie started yawning and decided to go upstairs, to the room that’d be Richie’s formerly, kissing your forehead and smiling nonchalantly before shoving Richie’s shoulder. So it was Richie, you and silence in the living room lighten up by TV flashes here and there. He was already sleepy, laying on the couch he had been sleeping since he insisted on leaving his parents’ bedroom for you, claiming he'd be a terrible host if he had you or Eddie without a bed. You, curled in the armchair, hated unsolved matters and worse than that, you hated when said unsolved matters had to do with Richie because you knew how he internalized everything he felt if it was slightly messed up. So you went straight to the point to avoid any evasions from him. “Did you get jealous of me and Eddie?” You asked right away, eyeing at him from your safe place. He looked at you, dead in the eye, no single sign of emotion perpassing his face. “Not at all, sweet thing,” he said, shrugging. “Why would I be?” You didn’t explain it, because you knew he knew where you were trying to get at, so your raised eyebrow was enough. But Richie raised his back and you had to get up because the lack of words from him, the one who’d never shut up, was bothering you beyond belief. You walked over the couch, passing a leg over his, straddling the Tozier boy for his slight astonishment, his reddish lips curving in a half-smile. Richie also had freckles, darker and more numerous ones than Eddie’s, all over his nose and cheeks, some across the rest of his face and none on the rest of his body. When he sat up with you still in his lap, you could smell that cologne you didn’t know exactly which was, but that you loved. Loved how its scent would stay ghostly on your clothes after you made out in his truck like a mark of his, just like the hickeys he’d give you sometimes, on hidden places so only you could see them. “Don’t fucking play dumb with me,” you whispered now, “I’m sorry, okay?” Richie snorted. “I’m not lying to you, y/n/n. I’m definitely not mad at you nor at Eddie. You’re making up things in your pretty head, doll” His hands drifted up your thighs. “I miss you, that's true. But it doesn’t make me jealous of that hell of a scene I saw earlier.” You noticed how he swallowed dry. “So you trying to convince me you’re not utterly disgusted and hurt?” Richie snorted once more at your tease and the light air of his relieving a lot of pressure from your chest. “Far from that, y/n/n...” The way his voice slowed down and his eyes drifted away from yours to his restless fingers on your skin...You finally understood where the problem laid on. And you wouldn’t even need the light pink shade of his cheeks to assure that. “Oh God, you liked it…” You whispered in disbelief and Richie laughed, hands on your hips now, pulling you closer. “What if I did, doll?” He didn’t let you answer, lips on yours before you recovered from your shock. He kissed slowly and passionately, it was always like that, kisses that after a few seconds already got you wanting to rip his clothes off. He was warm against you, bare chest pressed against still clothed yours. As earlier with the Kaspbrak boy, you had the urge of pulling away from him for your own sake, but you couldn’t this time. Richie peppered kisses all the way from your mouth to your jawline, kissing the spot that got your underwear ruined every time, earning himself a low whimper from your lips. You felt dizzy. “Eds is my best friend, toots,” he whispered against your skin, “there’s no one I’d be more glad to let spend time with you, touch you...” His hands ran up your sides underneath your shirt and your nails dig into his shoulders. “Kiss you.” He sucked a hickey on the crook of your neck that finally had you moaning out loud. “Richie-” His name. You could feel him smiling at that. “Or have you.” “For fuck’s sake, Richie…” You knew how to read in between his lines and in his darkened eyes when he pulled away to look into yours, glasses off. You knew he couldn’t see you quite well, but you could see him. If Richie was implying what you thought he was… “I told you I’d never lie to you, and I’m sticking to it.” Richie didn’t smile this time. “And believe me when I say I wish Eddie had taken you right on that counter.” You were the one dry swallowing now, thoughts running a mile a second. “For you to watch?” You scoffed, trying to hide how flustered you were. Richie remained serious when he laid down again. His moves underneath you let you feel him hardened under you. “No. I’d for sure join.” You read him again, tried to find whatever proved you he was just teasing. But he wasn’t. And that left you speechless, made him smile, tapping your hips gently. “But go to bed, toots. We can talk about it any other day. When you're ready and the cat doesn’t get your tongue.”

okay so i know i mentioned on here before that i have a bunch of dreams when i sleep and how i had that cute one with xiao & mingxiao before right?? 👀

forgot to share it sooner bc life but anyway i had a funny/cute dream with diluc the other day (i'll try to add a read more bc this got a lil long but it doesn't always work on mobile so i'll try & fix it asap if so!) but yeah this kinda turned into a whole fic of its own lol,,

☆ the dream itself is here, under the cut! ☆

basically, to not have to explain all the lore about my oc/self insert and all that again, the tldr of it is that i landed on teyvat similar to traveler but didn't really have anywhere to go so after gaining his trust and becoming close, diluc sort of just takes me in and lets me work at the tavern + lets me stay in a spare room at the winery. so yeah we often walk to/from work together if he's working at angel's share that day, and i guess everyone just assumes we're dating?? ...except for me, that is, who still thought he was in love with jean (bc of the whole stormterror thing).

one night, kaeya's been hanging out in the tavern all night, venti's already left or passed out or smth, and then once things close up, diluc and i get ready to head off, but apparently this is the first time kaeya's seen us head off together/in the same direction, and immediately decides to start teasing. he's all "ooh look at the two lovebirds, you've moved in together already? how'd you ask her out, i didn't know you two were a thing, congrats bro so glad she likes you back" kinda stuff and then i just start laughing and telling him to knock it off, wouldn't want jean to overhear and misunderstand. and they're both just like ......wait what? and i'm all "oh cause diluc likes jean right? i thought the were like an Unspoken Thing yknow??" and both stare at me as if i've grown like 3 heads and started doing a one-(wo)man barber shop quartet. lightbulb goes off in kaeya's head that i don't know jack shit & we're not a thing (yet) and diluc is just thinking like "i can't believe you're literally this oblivious, holy shit". hence kaeya's teasing The Sequel, where he just starts complimenting my uniform and says i look like a cute little maid or whatever and diluc is silently fuming behind me. he mutters something along the lines of "how oblivious can you possibly be?" and all but throws his coat/jacket over me to try and cover me "bc it's cold" (yeah yeah sure, jealous much? haha), then asks me how i never noticed how he felt about me. so i'm there having an earth teyvat-shattering moment of revelation that it WASN'T jean he liked, and that he didn't do all those nice things for me bc i'm friends with her, but because he liked...me????

kaeya smugly walks off with a little "you're welcome", after a his shenanigans, and i'm still trying to process things bc i'd never seen diluc that way, always assuming he'd liked someone else so i never really looked at him that way. we kind of quietly resume our walk back "home" and im clutching his jacket close to me, then we both try to speak at the same time, he tries to ask for my response/reaction and i was trying to ask for some time. he's kind of confused and almost looks hurt, but agrees to give me some time to think, since i explained the whole "not seeing him in that light" and didn't want to answer on a whim. that i didn't want to mistake gratitude for all he's done for me for affection and stuff so he was like hey good point i wouldn't want you to feel like i forced you into this, and no you're not gonna get kicked out/fired if you don't like me back, it's okay. diluc mentions having to be away for 2 weeks cause of a work trip and that i can respond then.

in the meantime, a bunch happened like a trip to liyue with aether & paimon, a whole girls' talk over tea with jean & lisa over the situation, and got my own lil serenitea pot so i potentially had the option of moving out now if i wanted to. i decided to my day off from the tavern to go out on a little adventure, just journey around and test out the teapot home and all that jazz. ran into noelle and we hung out/trained for awhile together and invited her in for for a tea break and stuff, like it was just really cute and fun. but apparently diluc came back a few days early and was freaking out when i was nowhere to be found, no one had any idea where i was, and was just really concerned something might happen to me. then noelle arrives through the gates and overhears him asking lisa stuff and goes all "oh she's over by (idk where i was maybe that bit of land between mond & liyue?) and he thanks her for the info and runs off to find me. he finds the teapot (somehow) on some rock but doesn't see me and i come back out of my lil abode bc someone outside kept saying my name and then i felt the teapot shake (he'd picked it up). cue a dramatic reunion in the rain bc when isn't it pouring and trying to kill me in teyvat in true romcom fashion i guess.

diluc is all "do you have any idea how worried i was about you? all alone out here? any of the abyss mages could have hurt you or taken you away or-" just rambles on and meanwhile im having this sort of Oh You're Back and I Think I'm Feeling Things realization (absence makes the heart grow fonder lol). so there's just this kind of strong, desperate hug moment and everything's quiet, save for the pouring rain and faroff occasional lightning strike. and i whispered something along the lines of "i think i'm in love with you" and his eyes widen before responding smth like "i think i'm in love with you too" with a fond smile, the first genuine huge smile i've ever seen on him (pls picture him like in the manga and not his in game ._. face PLS-🤣). cue another romcom cliche reunion hug + kiss scene in the rain, in which we take shelter from the rain inside the serenitea pot bc of how bad the storm kept getting.

(aether has tubby but i have chummy, kinda looks like the teapot salesman, and i usually just call her chums.) so we're greeted by chums who kind of is like staring daggers at diluc bc i showed up with a guest unannounced, drenched, and we're holding hands. she's overprotective in a very Mom Friend kind of way but she just means well. we change into some baggy share clothes i have and then i scrambled up something to eat (since we can apparently cook & forge in our lil pot i love that so much-) anyway so we decide to get some rest bc it's late and have the Oh No There Was Only One Bed conundrum until we agree to just share and sleep on opposite sides bc nbd right? i turned in my sleep and essentially was hugging his back whilst asleep, and he just turned over at some point and hugged me too, and booooiiii was this fire boy WARM, he felt like a personal heater and after all that rain, i slept like a log. diluc woke up before me cause he's used to an earlier schedule and slips out quietly to speak to chummy, asking if she knew where the supplies were cause he wanted to surprise me with breakfast (and man can he cook! goodbye kfc, hello good hunter). chummy is still kind of not vibing with him, until he apologizes for "intruding" and explains everything that's happened, to which chums kind of softens up and realizes he's sweet and just wants to do something nice, not go around raiding the house. woke up alone and went to look for the source of the smell, and kinda just clung to him, making diluc blush. don't remember too much more after the cooking thing though besides going for a stroll around my teapot layout, meeting all the pets that chill there, and kinda just having a relaxing day off together. the winery staff was probably freaking out wondering where we were, but we were just kinda in our own world (literally?), enjoying the peace before returning to all the chaos that is teyvat. cutest damn dream ❤

can i request something for your drabble event? “He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.” maybe combined with “Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” for javi, pretty please 💗 sending you many hugs and kisses!!!! hope you're doing okay sweetie!

character; javier peña

prompt; “he’s so pretty i think i’m gonna faint.” + “is there a reason you’re blushing like that?”

warnings; a lil bit of sexual content 😉 and some alcohol

a/n; it’s a tad longer than usual so there’s much more under the (hopefully functioning) cut

You sit on the edges of the room with your best friend and coworker, Joyce. You’re absentmindedly sipping on a mug full of rum and coke that had been poured for you an hour ago as she chatters on about all the people in the room. 

It’s Nancy Phillip’s last week in the Public Affairs office, about to retire and move back to the States with her husband. She’s been here longer than anyone else and seems to know everyone. You don’t know her that well, but you’re in the same office room as her every day, so it would be a little bit embarrassing to not show up. 

“Okay, so that woman over there, Chloe?” Joyce says. “She’s in charge of Exchanges and Programs or something, and apparently she was placed in a family embassy house instead of a single apartment, which kept the Chambers family from—holy shit, is that Javier Peña?”

You follow her line of sight, seeing Javier walking through the doors to the party. 

“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint,” Joyce groans. “I had no idea the DEA would show up. They’re always so lofty. But Javier? God, he’s so hot. I can’t fucking handle it.”

“He’s alright,” you say. Alright’s an understatement. But you’re not going to admit to Joyce that you thought he was attractive. 

For the past year, Javier had been flirting with you in the hallways. It was fun, and it made you feel sexy. You didn’t see anything wrong with it, even flirting back sometimes. The first time it went a little too far, a little too suggestive, he caught you in the parking lot and asked if you wanted him to stop. You told him no, and then didn’t talk to him for a week, terrified that your admission had revealed too much of how you thought about him. The flirting resumed afterward like nothing had changed.

It was almost a month ago, but you and Javi were the last people in the office for the night. Javier was leaving his part of the floor and walked past the Public Affairs office. That night you wound up bent over a table in a conference room, doors locked, as he railed you from behind. The best sex you had ever had. And the next morning you both acted like it hadn’t happened. Until it happened again, a week later. The third time was out in the bathroom of a bar, drunk. The fourth was a day later in his apartment. 

It was never acknowledged publicly. It was just sex. Both of you there for the other when you needed it and when no one was watching. A relationship that didn’t exist in the minds of a single other soul. 

“I wonder why he’s even here,” Joyce says. “Probably the free alcohol. From what I hear, he doesn’t do parties.”

“I wouldn’t know,” you say. Nancy has been making her rounds with the guests and you can see her getting closer. You don’t really want to talk to her. Pretend you’re sad about her departure. By your calculations, if you stay another fifteen minutes, you’ll have finished your drink, stayed long enough to be appropriate, and just barely escaped a conversation with Nancy. 

“Don’t look now,” Joyce whispers, still stuck on the idea of Javier. “But he’s looking at you. Pretty intently.”

You immediately look up, against your better judgment. And Javier is, in fact, staring at you, through the crowd. And not just staring, he’s walking towards you. Why?

“Oh my god, Y/N,” Joyce says, shuffling around to adjust her skirt. “He’s coming this way, please, do I look okay? If I say the right things, do you think he’ll ask me out?”

Do you think Javier would ask Joyce out? You glance back up at him and feel your face heat up with the memories of the last time he gave you a look like he’s doing right now, mischievous and excited. “I don’t think he’s the type, Joyce.”

“Ugh, you’re ruining it. At least let me think I have a chance,” she says. 

You laugh, trying to mask the fear that’s building up in your stomach. Nothing good could come out of speaking to him now. “You look… good.”

She seems soothed by your words, and you glance back up to search for Javier amongst the people. And he’s standing just feet away from you.

“Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” he asks you.

You squeeze your eyes shut, wishing you could be swallowed into the floor. “No, just, you know—I’m not blushing.”

“It looks a bit like it.”

“You’re Javier Peña, right?” Joyce says, and you hope she can keep the conversation away for as long as possible. Hope she didn’t think any further of your brief exchange. “I’m Joyce Gould.”

“Nice to meet you, Joyce.” He smiles. His voice is thick with the charm he uses on just about everyone. “I was coming over to ask Y/N about something, work-related. About a, uh, a press release.”

“Yeah?” you say, and searching his eyes you see the hidden meaning of his words, the recognition clicking into place with the slight lift of the corner of his mouth. 

“Oh come on,” Joyce groans. “Tonight’s about celebrating, not work. Save it for tomorrow.”

“It’s fine, Joyce. I was planning on going home in a few minutes anyway. We’ll just talk and then I’ll be leaving. See you tomorrow?” Javier’s waiting patiently and your body seems to instinctively shift towards him in anticipation of what’s about to happen.

“Ugh, you’re so boring,” she says. “But that means more booze for me, can I have the rest of yours?”

You hand her your mug and then wish her goodbye, slipping out of the room behind Javier. He leads you just across the hall and into the DEA offices. As soon as the door clicks closed behind you, your whirl around to face him, about to question everything.

“Shhh,” he says, placing a finger on your lips. “You have to be quiet, okay?”

The finger trails its way down your chin and neck before pushing down the neckline of your shirt. 

“We wouldn’t have to be quiet if we left now. If we went back to yours,” you whisper. The warmth of his finger resting just above your breast is enough to cause the arousal to heat up, your core already tightening. 

“What’s the fun in that?”

//

taglists; (let me know if you want to be added, removed, or moved around)

perm taglist; @turquiosenights @el-lizzie @sparrows-books @dxxkxx @opheliaelysia @trashbin2 @rzrcrst @arcadianempress @stevieharrrr @peterparkers-tingle @blushingwueen @coredrive @lokiaddicted @mserynlarsen @badassbaker @cosmicbug379 @flower-petal-blooming @talesfromtheguild @eupphoriaaa @weirdowithnobeardo @gaybroadwayloser @randomness501 @adikaofmandalore @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @poesdxmerons @bountyguild @sinnamon-bunn @readsalot73 @gooddaykate @rage-isaquietthing @womanontheedgeofnothing @coffeencontemplation @hiscyarika @mrsparknuts @wickedfrsgrl @thewallpapergoesorido @lady-tano @dontjudgemedude @cheekygeek05 @lavenderl3mons

pedro taglist; @pascalisthepunkest @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @souls-rain @twomoonstwosuns @sophiasescape

javier taglist; @letaliabane @awesomefandomsunited @applesislife

thesoulof-hp: Oooo Can you write one about when they get back to present day and what their next move is as a couple?!

Sure can! Thanks for the prompt :)

I’m a bit out of the loop on what people think things are gonna look like when we get back to present day/when the show ends but this is one of the possible futures that has been bouncing around my lil head!

On AO3

drew insp. from peace by t swift

(I’d give you my sunshine, give you my best

but the rain is always gonna come

if you’re standing with me.)

peaceShe can’t stop painting the walls. They were all grey, when she moved in. If Daisy knew anything about renting apartments, her want list for this one may have included something like “doesn’t look like a bunker” in addition to the only other detail she cared about — which had been proximity to the house Jemma bought. Unfortunately, apartment renting was not a life skill taught either by the nuns or by SHIELD. So after closing the deal, she’d come to the place with her new keys, her backpack, and one single box of belongings. There were no furnishings yet, and she sat in the middle of the empty would-be living room, staring at the dark walls.

She wished someone would have told her it would be so quiet.

When she couldn’t sit any longer she went to open the blinds. They were jammed, and old, and bunker-y. She sent soft vibrations through the screws holding up the blinds, until the entire contraption fell to the carpet with a muffled clunk. The glow of the streetlights streamed in to add a new shade of beige to the darkness.

Someone, a neighbor, was walking their lab down the sidewalk. It was this that made her pulse race and her heart constrict. It was all too still, too quiet. Too normal.

She called Sousa— he was getting better at the phone, but still refused to text — on principle, he said.

“Did you guys like, paint shit? In the dark ages?”

“Did we… paint?”

“Like, walls.”

“Sure.”

“Wanna come help me paint mine?”

“Now?”

“Now.”

“On my way.”

That first night, they drove to the hardware store together. Sousa hovered at her shoulder while she fingered through the paint swatches. She had never done anything like it before, and the choices were overwhelming.

“You should do yellow,” Sousa offered unhelpfully.

Daisy wrinkled her nose.

“Yellow?”

“I like yellow,” he defended, but he was grinning softly in defeat. “Reminds me of you.”

She ended up picking a purply blue called “french lavender”. While the paint mixed they got brushes and pans and a few other tools that the employee who finally wore them down with his offers of “help” directed them to. Sousa listened intently to the man’s painting tips, brow furrowed and folded. Daisy wanted to tell him to relax — it wasn’t that big of a deal. But she didn’t. She didn’t even say it when they got back to her apartment, and he carefully taped the molding as directed — even though it was going to double their work time.

With him around, the quiet wasn’t so bad. She gave him her phone to play Spotify — he had put up with only so much of her music before he put his foot down and insisted that for every new artist she introduced him to, he got to introduce her to some of his music. It was an easy pattern for them to fall into, trading off turns. She wasn’t sure if it really was his turn tonight. It didn’t matter.

It was past 1AM when they finished. He had opened the window at some point along the way, and the playlist had long since died out. Warm night air mingled with the fresh scent of paint. She was lying on her back on the carpet beside him, playing absently with his calloused fingers, rested on her stomach. Laying there with him, staring up at their wall — it was perfect.

When she woke with warm sunshine streaming over them, her head curled into the warm, steady rise and fall of his chest, his breath in her hair, their fingers still tangled — it was perfect then, too.

After she started moving in furniture, she realized she hated “french lavender”.

And so it began. “French lavender”, turned to “Robin’s egg blue”. “Robin’s egg blue”, turned to “cotton white”.

“Your walls are going to start peeling off in rainbows,” Simmons muttered whenever Daisy asked her opinion on different swatches, “honestly, Daisy, no one repaints this much. Daniel, tell her no one paints this much.”

She can’t stop herself — it still doesn’t feel right. She practically avoids the apartment most days. The quiet emptiness is like electricity in her veins. The stillness makes her heart pound in anticipation. She can’t relax. When the wall looks right — then, she’ll be able to breath.

She has a bed now, and a couch, and a table and chairs — plenty of things to sit on, but she sits on the floor a lot anyway, staring at the wall. Mostly uninterrupted. So she is surprised when her phone rings.

“Daniel?”

“Can I come over?”

They are firmly “dating” now. It feels like a silly word for it, like “boyfriend” seems like a silly word for him — this man that she’s plucked out of time. These words don’t fit right, they don’t quite match - a shade off from whatever it is that they are.

When she opens her door to him, she immediately notices the can of paint.

“Just give me a chance,” he defends, brushing a kiss to her forehead above her raised eyebrows as he steps over the threshold.

“Jemma put you up to this,” she gives in dry response, and he laughs.

“Nope, all me.”

“I’m not going to like it.”

“That’s fine.”

He moves past her into the living room and is already heaving the couch back away from the currently dark blue wall when she follows behind him, arms crossed over her chest. She makes no move to help him — in fact, she feels frustration bubbling up in her chest, threatening to take hold.

“Stop,” she says, but it is under her breath and he doesn’t hear over his own heaving of the couch. “Daniel,” she says louder now, “stop.”

“Daisy-“

“Dammit, just…” her breath catches, “just stop.”

She means to turn on her heel and storm out of the room, but she feels all of a sudden like the wind has been knocked full out of her, and all she can do is stand perfectly still searching to get her breath back.

Daniel has stopped now, and he stares across the room at her with a furrowed brow and eyes full of worry.

“Daisy,” he mutters, taking a few steps closer to her. “What’s wrong?”

She is still focusing on her breathing, because if she doesn’t she doesn't know what she'll say. She squeezes her eyes closed tight and counts as she breaths in, counts as she breaths out. Then, she carefully unclenches her teeth to speak.

“I’m not going to like it,” she says, enunciating each word carefully and fighting to remain steady.

“So then we’ll paint it again. Relax,” his eyes are soft and worried, “its not that big of a deal — what is this about?”

Her eyes are burning now. It isn’t the paint, of course it isn’t. But she doesn’t know how to put into words what it is.

“I don’t… this isn’t… fuck,” she is falling out of her own control now, a stray tear escaping her eyes and plummeting down her cheek. Daniel is close enough to mindlessly thumb it away.

“I lived in a van — a car,” she finally manages, “with carpet for walls. This,” she waves wildly around them, and a couple more tears knock themselves loose, “god, I don’t know what this is. I don't know how to be like this. It is just so…” a sob is strangling her, “It is all so goddamn quiet that I can’t breathe.”

When the sobs finally do overcome her, he is already holding her tight against him, burying a kiss on top of her head.

She wants this, wants him, wants normal walls that don’t feel like they are strangling her.

“After the war,” he says into her hair, “I slept on the floor. For… longer than I care to admit.”

He hesitates. Holds her tighter. She presses her forehead against his shoulder, breathes his warm sunshine-y scent, focuses on re-steadying herself.

“I was used to a sleeping bag on the rocks, at best. My bed… I felt like I was drowning in it.”

Steady enough now, she pushes back off of him and takes a step back rubbing roughly at her eyes.

“I wasn’t a soldier.”

“Yes, you were.”

The certainty of his words, the sureness in his eyes, stills her.

“And no one, least of all me, expects you to just… move on. Okay?”

She presses her lips together and breathes in slowly, counting. Then out.

“It is chaos,” she finally manages, voice still cracking. “This place is chaos, I can’t help it, I can’t stop it. I just… I want it to be peaceful and quiet and I want you to be here and not worrying about if I’m having another goddamn psychotic break about the color of the wall. But I’m never going to stop having psychotic breaks about dumb shit like the color of the walls.”

He smiles, just a little twitch of the corner of his lip, shaking his head ever so slightly.

“Daisy, I don’t give a damn about the walls. I just want to be with you.”

“I just want…” To have something normal? To give him something normal? He is watching her with those wide, dark eyes, his perpetually furrowed brow. The silence sits comfortably now, that its between them. Her heart gives a stutter. “I just want to be with you, too.”

(He brought "Daisy Yellow", and a flyer from their trip to the museum a few weeks prior. They move the couch and use the map of the constellations on the flyer to begin stenciling bright yellow stars into the deep ocean blue. She is sock-footed on the arm of the couch working on the upper corner, and he is sitting below her, so that when she sinks to a seat to dab more paint onto her brush, his head lolls comfortably backwards against her thigh.

Yellow paint has dried into her fingers, she notices as she runs a hand through his soft curls.

“We’re never going to finish this,” she says, eyeing the hundreds of thousands of pinpricks of stars on the flyer they are trying to emulate.

He laughs, low and deep.

“No rush.”

She slips off the arm of the couch, settling onto the floor beside him. It is still, and silent, and peaceful.

“Maybe you should stick around. For the wall.”

Soft — his eyes staring back at hers, the carpet under her socked toes, his lips against hers, the couch pressing into their backs, his hair tangled in her fingers.

“Okay.”)

missing puzzle piece <3 s.c.b

a/n: this is my first ever lil au that ive written so please bare with me as i’m typing this as i go hehe (✿◠‿◠) sorry for any grammatical errors!!

Summary: you and changbin have been friends for years, you’ve always had a soft spot for this kid.  You have always had those lingering thoughts in the back of your mind that maybe one day this friendship could turn into something more..

word count: 2.6k 

genre/rating: oneshot!, friends to lovers!, female reader, college age, fluff, just pure fluff, angst if you squint.

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As the summer winds down and the sense of the cool breeze fills the air, i know soon enough that the fall semester is coming closer.  i dont mind school all that much, its even better that i get to spend the day with one of my closest friends changbin.  we’ve been friends for gosh knows how long and we act like brother and sister at this point. But nonetheless, theres always that feeling of “what if” in the back of my mind.... what if we did end up dating? I always feel like a puzzle with a missing piece.... I want to find someone to complete the puzzle.  As i shove those thoughts to the back of my mind i hear my phone buzzing on my bed.

-Binnie 6:30pm-

what u doing tonight? are you free??

-Y/N 6:33pm-

i have a hot date with a bowl of ice cream and the couch tonight, but i guess i can rain check. whatchu got planned?

-Binnie 6:37pm-

Wanna go to the beach with me and the boys? we plan on chilling and watching the sunset with a fire and a few drinks.  whaddya say you in?

-Y/N 6:40pm-

count me in...pick me up in 30

-Binnie 6:45pm-

shweeeeet see u then

As soon as i see that text, i put my phone down and change out of some comfy clothes and change into shorts and a cropped tee.  I should probably bring a hoodie but i know Changbin has a few in his car.  I swear that man has a whole closet in his car.  I put on a pair of slip on shoes so that way i can take them off when I’m at the beach.  As I’m putting on shoes i see Changbin’s car pull into my driveway.  After grabbing my house keys and purse I head down the driveway to get into the car where Felix and Han are in the backseat giving me the front seat.

“Glad you gave up your hot date with ice cream to hangout with us tonight” Changbin says as he heads down the road to get to the beach.

“You know i was gonna finish Avatar tonight and cry over my love for zuko but NOOOOOOO i’m gonna become a babysitter for 9 kids as they throw each other in the ocean” i say with the slightest bit of sarcasm

“Oh c’mon Y/N, the ending of avatar can wait. theres supposed to be a comet tonight!!!!” Felix chirps from the backseat

“Yeah Y/N the sky is supposed to be clear and we’ll be able to see it pass by, you wont be able to see it for another 100 years!” Han chimes in.

“They’re right Y/N, it’s a perfect night to watch it.  When will you ever be able to say you’ve seen a comet pass by in your lifetime?” Changbin adds to the conversation.

“I’m pretty sure I saw a comet that time where we were all star gazing on Minho’s roof last summer” i say to them as changbin pulls into the beach parking lot.

“Y/N i hate to break it to you, but that was an airplane.” Han says while Felix giggles.

I turn back at the giggling fools and give them a glare.

“I SHALL STAND BY THE FACT THAT IT WAS A COMET YOU TWO” i say back to the boys as Changbin puts the car into park.

We meet up with the rest of the boys who are currently setting up a makeshift fire pit and setting out some foldable chairs, thats when i realize theres 9 chairs but 10 people.  Guess I will have to sit in the sand.  I don’t worry about it too much when i see Chan currently chasing Seungmin with a dead jellyfish on a stick trying to poke him.  We haven’t been here a total of 5 minutes and there’s already chaos.

-

-

-

After an hour or two of the boys running around in the sand, throwing each other in the water, and a quite competitive game of tag, the sun starts to turn the sky the most beautiful shades of orange and red.  Chan runs to his car to grab a speaker and Hyunjin starts a fire.  Pretty soon the boys gather around the fire when Jeongin says 

“Guys theres only 9 chairs and 10 of us...”

“I’ll just sit on the sand.” I say as I get ready to sit in the sand.

“Y/N, just sit on my lap” Changbin says quietly as you didn’t hear him walk up behind you

“Nono Binnie it’s fine I-”

“No excuses, now come on” he says as he drags me with my hand in his.

While I’m sure no one saw that encounter, I’m pretty sure they see the huge blush that has crept across my face.  Sure I’ve sat on changbins lap before, we do it when theres movie night at Woojins place.  It’s nothing new between us but my feelings for Changbin push through my mind and soon enough, I’m sitting on his lap trying to make myself comfy on his thighs.  Changbin casually snakes his hands across my waist and i suddenly freeze up.  Well thats new, he normally never does that. I try to relax my body and for some reason, it feels natural.  I suddenly feel safe in his arms. 

“Does anyone know when this whole comet thing will come??” Minho says as the music plays in the background.

“According to my phone, it says that we’ll be able to see it pass through around 10 or so.” Felix says as he looks it up on his phone.

“Well since we have time to kill, how about a friendly game of truth or dare?” Hyunjin adds to the conversation.

the group and I nod our heads in agreement as the game of truth or dare starts.

“Seungmin, Truth or dare?” Hyunjin starts off.

“Dare” Seungmin says non chalantly.

“I dare you to run into the ocean with your shoes on” hyunjin says while everyone giggles

“Really? I just bought these shoes ughhhhh” Seungmin sighs as he gets up from his chair and runs towards the water

“I hate this i hate this i hate this” he says as everyone by the fire laughs hysterically 

Once he returns back to the shore where the fire pit is, he takes off his shoes and sits down with a huff.

“alright lets see, Y/N truth or dare?” He says as his eyes direct towards me and changbin.  

I’m not one to play these games so i decided to play it safe

“Truth” i say

“BOOORRRRRINGGGGGGG” Han says from the other side of the fire

“Hmm, when was the last time you kissed a boy?” he says and the group falls silent

Shit, when was the last time i kissed someone? well besides my cat Lucifer i don’t think i’ve ever kissed anyone? Do I lie and say last week? or do I tell the truth and say no one?

“uhhh never” I say in a quiet voice as everyone eyes are glued to me still.  I can feel Changbins gaze on me as he tenses up a little bit, squeezing his arms a little tighter around me

“You really haven’t kissed anyone? Not even that kid you were seeing last semester?” Changbin whispers into my ear

“No we went on two dates and he was a total square and was really boring, he never initiated anything anyways” I say back

“Alrighty Y/N, you can ask a truth or dare or have someone else pick” Seungmin says as he waits for my response

“uhm, Changbin can pick who goes next” I say as I look down at the sand, my feet becoming more interesting

“Can I dare myself?” Changbin says as the group shares a puzzled look with eachother. It’s quiet for a moment before Chan says

“I mean it’s not a rule that you can’t do it but I guess go ahead buddy”

“Alright, I dare myself that I go on a walk with Y/N for a bit. You guys can keep playing” he says and I perk my head up and turn around facing him, giving him a puzzled look.

“Why would you wanna dare yourself to do something so casual?” I say as I get up off of his lap. My waist feeling empty as I grew used to having Changbins arms wrapped around me

“It was beginning to get boring anyways, plus my leg fell asleep from you sitting on it” he chuckles

As we two walk away from the guys who are giggling and laughing, their voices become faint as all I hear are the waves crashing along the shore. It’s peaceful, it’s quiet, and it’s just Changbin and I.

It’s silent for a few minutes before Changbin exhales and stops for a moment to look at the water and the stars up in the sky.

“How come you never told me you haven’t kissed anyone? Cmon Y/N we’ve been friends for years. We tell eachother everything” Changbin says and I look over at the water avoiding his eye contact

“I just didn’t think it was that big of a deal. How lame is it that I haven’t even had my first kiss and my younger sister has for gods sake? I sound like a loser saying it. It’s easy for you to say, I bet you boast to the boys on how many girls fling themselves at you.” I say with a hint of jealousy at the end.

“I don’t think it’s lame y/n, you’re just saving yourself for someone special. And no I do not brag to the boys about “all the girls I get” when in reality I have a different girl in mind.” He says as he goes and steps in front of me. Faces inches away from each other.

I take a few steps back to get some space between us. He’s acting different. It seems like this girl is really sweet from the sounds of it. I try not to act jealous when I start to ask about her

“Who’s this special girl in mind huh? How come you never brought this up to me? Do I approve of her?” I start to spit fire questions at Changbin before he starts talking again.

“I’ve never brought it up to you because I don’t want to ruin anything that I already have with her. I’ve been so nervous to fully confess my feelings because there’s that thought in the back of my mind that maybe she doesn’t like me back.” Changbin rambles when you cut him off

“Why don’t you man up and do it already? I mean the worst thing she could say is no right? Who knows, maybe she does like you back.” I say and Changbin blurts out

“I like you a lot y/n, like a lot a lot”

Holy shit

Seo Changbin, my best friend of 11 years

Just confessed

That he likes me????

“I- I- really? You’re kidding right? Changbin don’t play with my feelings-“ I say before he cuts me off

“Y/n I’m serious, I’ve liked you for a long time and I didn’t know how you would feel, but I know it was stupid of me to confess you know? I probably ruined everything and now our friendship is ruined and nothing will ever be the same again and I-“ before he rambles himself into oblivion i cut him off.

“The feelings mutual binnie, I’ve liked you for god knows how long” i say as he looks up at me.

“I’ve liked you since that day when I jumped off the jungle gym in 3rd grade and you helped me to the nurses office. I’ve always had those feelings for you but I always pushed them back in my head because who knows how you would feel right? So whenever you went and saw other girls it made me the slightest bit jealous. Always wondering if that could be us someday. So then I went on dates with guys but nothing lasted for more than one date. They weren’t you Changbin. It was always you” I say so fast i almost run out of breath

We look at eachother for a few moments before Changbin wraps one of his arms around my waist, taking his other and tucking a few strands of loose hair behind my ear. We look at each other for a few moments as my hands snake up around his neck, definitely a feeling I could get used too. His eyes go from my eyes, down to my lips, then back up to my eyes.

“Since you never had your first kiss, may I?” Changbin says as he’s looking at me like I’m the finest piece of art in the world. Taking in everyone of my features.

“I’d thought you’d never ask” I say with a grin.

He closes the distance between us and both of our eyes close. His lips are warm and soft. Although I’ve never kissed anyone before I start to follow his lead and mirror what he’s doing. It’s a slow and adoring kiss. Not anything fast or sensual. We take our time to see how our lips mold into one another. We break away for a few moments and Changbin puts his forehead on mine.

“You know for not kissing anyone, it seems like you knew what you were doing” he says with a childish grin

“Eh from all the rom coms I’ve watched I feel like I had a good grasp of what I was doing” I say back before he kisses me again. 

I kiss him as if he’s going to disappear from me, pretty soon he has both of his hands around my waist, squeezing my sides earning a quiet yelp from me.  We break away the kiss again and i see him look up in the sky.

“Y/n there it is!!! It’s the comet” he says as he turns me around, hugging me from behind. His chin rests gently on my shoulder as we look at the comet pass by.  

“I don’t think I’ve seen anything more jaw dropping than this before” I say as i look closely at the comet passing by.

“Oh trust me princess, this comet is pretty. but nothing will compare to you” he says as he pecks my neck with kisses.

“We should probably go back before the guys round up a search party for us.” i say while leaving his touch and grab his hand, heading back to the crazy bunch of boys.

Once we make our way back to the gang they look at us with questioning looks, we’re both smiling like idiots and our hands are intertwined.

“What took you guys so long??? You missed the comet, you should’ve seen it!” Jeongin says

“Do i even wanna know what happened?” Chan says, raising a brow at us.

“Don’t worry guys, we stopped and saw the comet too. Nothing crazy happened.” Changbin says with a sheepish grin and I start giggling 

“Did you two confess to one another yet? I’ve been waiting for this.” Hyunjin says as the boys nod their heads in agreement.

“Yeah Bin, did you finally grow a set and confess? I was getting sick of the late night texts saying “ooooo im in L word my guy” “bro she looks so good today”- UGH” Han continues to ramble while Felix elbows him in the gut. 

Changbin and I look at each other and start laughing, he leans down and pecks me on the lips. Earning a few “awws” and an “ew” from Jeongin.

“Does that answer everyones questions?”  Changbin says as we sit back down by the fire. 

We sit back down and start chatting at the fire, talking about the comet and small talk in between. For the first time in my life, I feel content with everything. Content with these 8 crazy boys I can call my friends. And Changbin, everything feels so right finally. It feels like all the puzzle pieces have been put together

Changbin was my missing puzzle piece. 

And now the puzzle is complete.

Southbound  ch 1/ ch 2

After the Cullens leave her behind, Bella is left to pick up the pieces by herself. A year after her eighteenth birthday, a split second decision lands her in her truck, running far away from everything she has ever known. She decides to go south. What will she find in San Angelo, Texas?

One day I’m going to have to admit to my demise. The casket will be small and the rain will be pouring like it does everyday there. Charlie’s eyes will puff up like abandoned birthday party balloons in the desert heat-- and I will not be there to dry them. The church parking lot is gonna look like a high school reunion. A maze of junkers that never quite made it out of Forks, the high heels of my former friends swapped out for rain boots.

After a tearless goodbye from a pastor I never met and school acquaintances I never spoke to, the purple haze of my childhood bedroom will be packed into brown cardboard boxes. Like I didn’t live there at all. As if my mark on the world only existed in our-- my meadow.

I could feel the curl of dandelion weeds at my back pocket but refused to move an inch. His ochre eyes were spun as thick as honey as he laid beside my body. There was a gleam of something I couldn’t place in the part of his lips, but I returned the smile with my own. The press of cold flesh spread through my neck, down my spine, through my toes and into the mush under his shoes.

In the small blink of my lashes his form disappeared into the air.

The bed of wildflowers around me turned to ash before I could reach for him. All I could smell was nothing like the forest and everything like a bonfire left wild. The flames crawled towards me, my body refusing to budge in its wake. My head screamed to just MOVE.

My eyes opened to a blurry mass of nothing. Tears rolling down my cheeks, their path as uncertain as my whereabouts as I raised up on my elbows. They dried before I could wipe them away.

The pads of my fingers found the line of ancient stitching on the bench seat like a security blanket. My rapidly blinking eyes rolled around the cab in an untraceable pattern. The windows were clear and still, the leather beneath my backside warm to the touch. I could see my reflection in the silver lining the dashboard, the dark blanche underneath my eyelids clenched at my tired heart

There were no flowers. No meadow. No him.

Sitting up completely, I let out a breath I didn’t know I was carrying. The rushed exhale through my cracked lips brought my lungs to the dip of my ribs-- the familiar ache pulling the back of my skull taut.

Outside, the swell of Texas sun rises just beyond a gathering of trees. I can’t remember how I got here, the smell of asphalt long gone. Instead a dirt road lined my eyesight. It gave far too little clue to my immediate surroundings. Above me the sky was as clear as the south gets and the ground solid like beaten down gravel-- but no road signs. No mile markers.

I can’t even see behind the horizon.

The air in the cab became overcrowded with my fear, the push and pull of breath fogging up the chilled glass. I feel like a child left behind in a supermarket. Unreadable ques leading me farther and farther into the swamp of confusion.

My tires sat flat against the path, just beside it, as if I had just turned off to get some shut-eye. But why here? The middle of absolute nowhere? Had I learned nothing from the nomad with the hair like my forest fire?

My hand twisted the ignition before I could stray to the silver scar on my right wrist. It’s memory glinting in the corner of my mind.

All I can get out is the sputter of the motor, a failed attempt to rise the slumbering beast.

Another hard turn returns with the same groan.

I could feel the sweat start to slide down the expanse of my back in a winding trail. The salt water seeping into the flannel pushed up around my hips in a faux blanket. My palms slid around the wheel-- the leather close to splitting.

Me too, baby. Me too.

The door handle started to whisper to me. A stupid notion to leave the steel barrier hung onto the interior in flashing chrome.

I should've taken that damn cell phone Charlie tried to buy me last year. I could’ve at least called a tow. Maybe found out where in the hell I was-- but no. Who did I need to call back then? A boy who could pick out my heartbeat in a sea of a hundred exhausted teenagers? The press of my scent to his senses would’ve said everything I need to say anyway.

But now, no almost-not-quite-humans with super hearing as far as I could see.

The rusted-out Chevy felt more and more like a cage by the minute. A rushed push of the door frame threw my feet to the red dirt. A careful hand skimmed along the side of the truck as I followed the structure to the bed in a half-creep.

My ears were hypersensitive to the billow of wind blowing through the tops of the oak trees. The motion reminded me of the run on Edwar-- the creature’s back through the forest. Normally unwatchable to my dull eyes, but on his back I could see the restlessness of the air, the ever moving flight of dragonflies and underground wonders. Well up until I had the urge to puke.

I couldn’t say the sight of the wavering treeline didn’t give me the same feeling.

My entire body jumped nearly out of my skin at the sound of metal slapping something solid. My back clenched, the hair on the back of my nape sent sky-high.

“Down girl, it’s alright, no need to get all bug-eyed on me now.” A man’s voice came from a few feet behind me. My mind raced with the decision to face him or not. To see the person who would finally take me out. Or to lay down and leave the world not knowing the monster’s face.

A rough hand on my shoulder stops my thoughts in their measly tracks.

“You know,” A deep breath let out just behind me bounced off the metal of the truck back into my ear, “I don’t know many people that stray over to these parts real often. You must not be from around here, miss.” His hand turned my body to face him, the packed dirt underneath my sneakers scuffing into the silent air. My body felt as though it was under a spell. A rabbit held under the jaws of a coyote.

His smile caught me off guard.

It was no show off teeth, carnivore-sharp grin. It was a gentle pull of lips. A soft rose blush underneath the skin. The rest of his face was shadowed by the brim of a worn leather cowboy hat, his eyes masked slightly by it. Dragging my eyes down, I could almost feel the cotton of his button-up. It looked lovingly washed, as if it was worn for decades and not weeks. His Wranglers were in the same predicament. A smudge of what looked like motor oil stained into the crease of his knee, a rip could be easily seen by his ankles. And on his feet-- matching cowboy boots. The spurs had the same metal of his belt buckle in a vintage way, I could almost see him buying them as a set in some small town in the middle of Mexico.

“Sweetheart I know I’m good lookin’ and all but I did ask you a question a lil’ while ago…” He trailed off, his mouth set in a teasing upturn.

My eyes went wide, the fear lifting off my shoulders oddly by his tone. “I… Yes. You could say I’m not from around here.” The sentence tumbled out with a small thought of protecting myself. Keeping myself alive was first-- even if the apparent cowboy held himself like warm butter, quirked and sweet.

His brow lifted.

“You’re as closed off as a heifer in the dry season ya know that?”

His hand left my shoulder and held themselves up in mock surrender before placing them on his belt. His hip made contact with the side of the truck while starring me up and down. His eyes dragged up my fingers to my shoulder up to my lips and nose. My chest constricted with self consciousness.

The man in front of me rivaled every human boy I’ve ever met-- well man I’ve ever met. His legs, drawn out with a long line of denim, his shoulders square and broad. He looked older than He was, if anything he reminded me of Jasper.

The wavy blond hair peeking out of his hat, curling around his laid back collar. The stone corners of his shaded jaw. The slightly tanned skin, made from working fields I didn’t need to see. Even the fullness of his lips reminded me of the veteran vampire.

When his eyes landed on my own I realized-- he was waiting for me to speak again.

With a deep breath through the nose I managed to start, “I’ve been traveling from Fo-- the Pacific Northwest for a couple months. I got into Texas not too long ago.” A simple nod from his covered head prompted me to keep going, not commenting on my change of location. “I was just north of Lubbock last night. I woke up in my truck not long ago, but I’m not too sure where I am to be honest.” A low breath left my throat when I finished.

His stature straightened and I could now see how truly tall he was. He towered over me by a foot, almost. His mouth opened in a toothy smile and my brain clicked.

“Oh my god is this your land? I’m so sorry I didn’t know this was private land, my truck won’t start and I--” My ramble was suddenly cut off by a guttural laugh.

“Missy! You act like imma gonna what? You think imma skin your hide for wonderin’ onto this piece of dirt? C’mon now. Lemme getchu you somethin’ before you fall over dead.”

His back turned to me almost too fast. His form started to trek across to the treeline, his boots leaving indiscernible footprints into the rocky ground. I started to run to catch up and then stopped myself. Why would I follow this man? Did I have no self preservation? I didn’t even know him, no beachy waves or shiny belt buckle would be worth maybe dying over!

“Are you comin’ or what missy? I need to call my brother about your truck, so we gotta go to the house. It’s not far I promise.”, he yelled from the treeline, somehow persuading me to inch forward, heel to toe, towards him. My brain lost in the end, my pace quickening until I was right on his tail.

His neck turned to look me dead in the face, the shadow from his hat casting over the both of us for a moment. It was the most serious look I had seen on him in our short time together. It was almost soldier-like.

“I never asked.”

My eyebrows pinched together. “Asked what?”

“Your name, darlin’.” His face broke, smiling in a childish way, making it look like the simplest thing in the word.

My thoughts of self preservation long gone, I responded, “...Bella.”

His smile widened.

“Peter. Peter Whitlock.”

Since I seem to be in a really positive mood today and even though this show clearly doesn't deserve this post here's my list of favorite skam france s6 clips:

Samedi 07:52 The day after ep1: I really really loved the first clip of the season a lot more than the trailer and I think that it was such a great introduction to Lola's pov. We really saw the world through her eyes in such a special way in that moment n I loved all the hints to the plot (same sex couple walking down the street and being viewed as completely normal> w|w storyline with no internalized homophobia; the raccon tag > foreshadowing for otteli and urbex plot; lola photographing broken things > insight into lola's feelings) The cinematography and use of pov was a masterpiece in this one.

Lundi 7:43 Tiff ep1: This one is just here for the grew being the most supportive and loving friend group, skipping classes together to take care of Daphné and that group hug <33 need I say more?? No. Every clip with the grew is gonna be on this list because the little screen time they had this season needs to be honoured. I'm sorry that they did you so dirty babes:((

Mercredi 13:03 Fuck the planet ep1: my absolute favorite mayla clip this season!! one of my absolute favorite clips in general!! I still remember the day when they dropped that clip and I got so excited for this season again. Maya being a climate activist and such a warm and lovely person I immediately fell in love with her. Maya looking at Lola as if she's a princess walking down the stairs to a ball in some fairy tale. Maya not letting Lola's cold remarks throw her off n replying with equal sass instead, Maya's iconic coming out line and Lola smiling for the first time all season!! That clip was really off the charts

Vendredi 16:43 Someone exceptional ep1: This is my absolute favorite clip of the whole season and the amount of times I've rewatched this is actually unhealthy. Something just clicked and for the first time I felt really connected with Lola and felt and understood her pain (probs to Flavie she was amazing here) I loved the lil details abt this clip: Lucas playing the piano, le grew all hugging Daphné, Daphné's speech and break down (lula was amazing here too I really really felt connected to Daphné in that moment), Eliott and Lola meeting for the first time (their best clip this season, gosh the potential they had to actually develop such a cool and beautiful sibling relationship with them and then they did.... whatever the rest of their storyline was), Lola trying so hard to read Daphné's speech and then holding her own instead because she so desperately needs to get this off her chest and make ppl understand her and last but not least the cinematic shots of her running out of the church and breaking down. Truly my favorite clip.

Mercredi 12:56 You don't know me ep2: my second favorite mayla clip and hell did I love their dynamic and chemistry in this one. The community service clips were so so special and gave them such unique vibes I'm so sad that the rest of their storyline really couldn't live up to that because the beginning really was breathtaking and I was so here for their storyline and really believed that I would get the w|w rep I deserve this season. Rip

Jeudi 19:33 Sorry ep2: Daphné and Lola finally warming up to eachother, both of them apologizing, Lola saying that she can make dinner and they can watch one of Daphné's favorite tv shows together. Baby steps. Also Daphné grieving and smelling her mother's shirt to find comfort. Such an important clip!!

Vendredi 22:22 Otteli ep2: Again the opening shots and cinematography of this clip!! Lola meeting la mif for the first time and I was completely buying their found family dynamic from the start, maya and lola being 👀 the entire time and last but not least Eliott being introduced as urbex legend n royalty,, the wasted potential of that storyline tho...

Samedi 6:43 An awesome party ep3: again maya's and lola's chemistry in this one and their first real and deep conversation, maya opening up about her parents and how she found a home and family in la mif, their smiles and laughs and lola replying to Daphné's text messages because that's growth baby!

Lundi 7:53 The slap ep3: again just here for le grew, the way they all pulled daphné in for a group hug I'm cryinnn. Also Lucas telling the people who were gossiping abt Lola to turn around and mind their own business, dare I say iconic. the way we could have had it all this season and then skamfr decided to make them enemies. Hate it here

Samedi 13:18 Hangover ep4: this clip being a parallel to the beginning of ep2, we all believed that Lola went out and slept with another stranger and would feel lost and overwhelmed again and then! we and she found out that she's at maya's n instead of being lost again she completely openes up to Maya abt her life and Maya just holds her and Lola clings onto her as if her life depends on it and finds comfort in Maya. Still crying about this one

Mardi 21:43 You want to talk about it? ep4: I would be lying if I didn't tell you that I've rewatched this clip countless of times simply because seeing Eliott so happy and excited at his workplace has me feeling some type of way. I liked his and Lola's general dynamic in this one my main problem is just that it was so damn underdeveloped and came out of nowhere. Skam france you're a transmedia show text messages would have really helped you bby!!

Samedi 14:23 Luquette ep5: ohh out of all the clips with Eliott in it this one's definitely my favorite (and also one of the only ones I liked) both Eliott and Lola getting to speak for themself abt their mental health, seeing Eliott's development going from being ashamed and hiding his mental illness to now being so open about it and giving others advice, them talking about Eliott's Lucas and Lola's Luquette (🥺) Eliott being ready to run from Daphné with Lola and Lola saying that she's gonna take responsibility and Eliott looking like a proud big brother > the only clip with sibling vibes of them this season

Samedi 17:36 Just a girl ep5: Daphné and Lola reconciling, Daphné wanting to buy Lola picture frames and not letting that go even tho they have so little money and she sorts other stuff out instead. Please their sister bond this season has my heart. And also Maya and Lola at that supermarket gay panic energy at its finest. I loved that clip and that even after what happened last Friday Maya is still such a warm and loving person in that clip. Ugh why did they had to ruin her character later that season??☹

Mercredi 18:49 I miss you ep5: in case y'all are wondering if I'm just gonna put every single mayla clip on that list- don't worry this one is gonna be the last in a while. Anyway back to the good old days lamifex hanging all out together and being literal children together <33 mayla finally getting to talk and Maya explaining herself, showing Lola her scars and telling her that she misses her when she's not around. My heart combusted watching that clip

Lundi 12:35 We are even ep6: le grew studying together!! especially lucas and imane!!!! screaming. the only time we ever got to see them preparing for the bac but at least we have this one clip. Basile and Lola sibling dynamic and also the clip confirming that Daphné indeed has an eating disorder and Lola beginning to be really worried about her

Mercredi 18:27 I don't know what you're looking for ep6: Lola finding out about Daphné's eating disorder and finding proof in her room, Daphné freaking out and the last shots of her trying so hard not to fall apart, lula's acting in this scene!! It was all so realistic it truly is one of the top ten clips too

Jeudi 21:53 It won't always work ep6: Daphné and Lola talking and Lola opening up abt her addiction problems and telling Daphné that she can really really understand her and that both of them can get better again, Lola and Daphné being completely at peace and cuddling on the couch and watching tv together. One of my favorite clips of them this season I just love their sister bond so much

Mercredi 16:52 The break up ep7: both Lula's and Paul's acting was incredibly I was 100% buying that break up, Basile desperately wanting to help Daphné but not really knowing how, Daphné throwing him out and immediately having a break down, feeling so helpless and lost :'(( also Lola seeing her sister breaking down and not knowing how to help her either broke my heart. Protect the Lecomte sisters at all costs

Dimanche 18:32 Freesias ep8: for me this one was the true full cycle moment this season. The Lecomte family visiting their mum on mother's day, Lola revealing that she does know her favorite flowers and that her mum used to sent them to her along with letters she never read, Lola saying that if she could she might read them now but it's too late for that and in some kind of way she was making peace with her mum and everything that happened between them. Daphné taking the umbrella so Thierry can pull Lola close and them just standing in the rain and healing n growing as a family!! This clip was so emotional and important and skamfr had the audacity to destroy all that development with Thierry for useless drama. I'm endlessly bitter

Mardi 18:03 Vital prognosis ep8: just daphné, basile, lola and maya being a happy lil family together. This clip was so peaceful and beautiful to watch every time ep9 ruined my mood I went back to this clip to cheer myself up again. Really wish we could have seen more of them together and maya and lola as a couple

Vendredi 23:04 Emergency ep10: okay so I really didn't like that skamfr switched povs to build up suspense and was actually just triggering for many of us. But I just wanna say Lula's acting!!! The way she said "But how do you know we're going to find her, Lucas? Putain! She has never left a note before this is the first time for all we know" truly her acting!! I rewatched that clip so many times for that line alone (until I realized that the storyline was actually really triggering for me so I haven't watched the clip ever since but still)

Samedi 01:06 Sisters ep10: still hate the storyline and that it was done in episode 10 but I'm sooo glad that Daphné went to talk to Lola alone, that Daphné tells her that she's always loved her and basically everything they said in that clip!! Really moving and emotional one of the only clips that really made me cry this season. Again I live for Flavie's and Lula's acting

Mercredi 16:38 Beep beep beep ep10: even tho the mayla storyline was in context of the season really lacking depth at this point, watching this clip ignoring the context really was a cultural reset. One thing I love abt skam france is just that they let lgbt people live their lives without having homophobia being thrown at them left and right so kissing your gf in the middle of the supermarket like that might not be realistic but I don't care!!!!! let the gays live their life and kiss in the supermarket!!! thanks!! also that song especially the lyrics "darling I won't let you go" thoughts are being thunk💌

And yeah basically that's it. As yall may notice I loved the first half of the season way more than the second half and I feel like there was so much wasted potential and important storylines left unaddressed because they wanted to throw in more drama....

transcript.file//jfreeman_codingb//convo

[Emergency Program Active]

AdminJF: Heya B-)

CodingB: ...? Allen? Where's Joshua?

AdminJF: He's still asleep, just snoozin away.

CodingB: Still a-... Isn't it... late? Why are you up.

AdminJF: Had a nightmare

AdminJF: Couldn't get back to sleep

AdminJF: Figured a lil chatting with ya could do me some good.

CodingB: ... With... me?

CodingB: Wait a moment...

CodingB: Communications are offline... I didn't think that was possible...

AdminJF: Yeaaa, boy like me's fulla tricks B-)

AdminJF: 'sides, don't think chattin with 'em would help out. They're... kinda chaotic.

CodingB: Unlike you, pizza box tearer?

AdminJF: Ey ey, I'm the FUN kinda chaotic! Those guys... eh... I know Josh trusts them. No surprise there. I mean, apart from you, they're the only peeps who MIGHT help him out... I'm still on the fence about them tho.

CodingB: I see.

CodingB: May I ask... what your nightmare was about? I do not know exactly how dreams work, but talking about what ever is making you upset tends to help.

AdminJF: Are you sure? It's... kinda dumb.

CodingB: I am all ears! And eyes! You have my full attention!

AdminJF: Right, well

AdminJF: where tf do I start...

AdminJF: I was... running in this like, industrial... plant of some kind? Like, running from something that I couldn't see? Like, that went on for a while, that I was just running and trying not to trip or crash into anything.

AdminJF: So at some point, I end up at this biiig chain link fence, like, the kind they put up in big facilities, I think. Anyways, I start climbing the thing, only to get pried off and thrown on my ass by, I guess whoever was chasing me??

AdminJF: But like, I look up at the guy, and I still can't really "see" him. Could say they looked like a shadow, but even that doesn't cover it really. That's around where I woke up and just. I dunno. Woke up about an hour ago and I've been too anxious to head back to sleep...

CodingB: ... I can't say I blame you exactly. An event like that, dream or not, would stress anyone, I'm certain. Until you've calmed down sufficiently, I don't think sleep will be possible...

AdminJF: Yeah, well, all the more reason to chat, right?

CodingB: I suppose so. Had you any topics in mind?

AdminJF: Oh Yea yea

AdminJF: ... No. I really don't.

CodingB: Ah. Then... could I ask you something?

AdminJF: Shoot.

CodingB: ... What is it like out there? Past the screen, I mean. Out in the sun. Out in the grass...

AdminJF: Ah shit... I'm really the wrong dude to ask but uh

AdminJF: It's... fine? No no uh... It... gives you something to do. Sun can get pretty hot down here but it's a helluva lot better than being cold in like, the snow and shit. Josh's been complaining that it's getting colder when... it hasn't? Like, I would know, I'm p sensitive to temperature shifts yo, but it's just been as hot as ever.

AdminJF: Uh, back on topic

AdminJF: Grass is... pretty soft, gives off a nice smell after it's cut. Uh... worms live in the dirt grass grows in...

CodingB: Oh, worms?

AdminJF: Yea, not like computer worms, but uh, little... long slimey things. They eat dirt and filter out the bad stuff so the ground stays healthy and all that.

AdminJF: Birds and lizards and fish like to eat them but I wouldn't recommend it.

CodingB:

CodingB: Allen, did you-

AdminJF: No!

AdminJF: Classmate back in primary did tho

AdminJF: Dared himself to cuz there was a bunch out after it rained and then uh

AdminJF: Y'know what, let's talk about something else.

CodingB:

CodingB: Well, um, do you think I'll ever get to see out there?

CodingB: Like, leave the device and go outside?

AdminJF: Knowing Joshua? Without a doubt. He's prob already working on the blueprints.

CodingB: ... Really?

AdminJF: Pfft, of course! You've met the guy! He's too kindhearted for his own good. J will stop at nothing to help others, even at his own detriment. I mean, case in point: He's friends with me.

CodingB: ... What's wrong with being friends with you?

AdminJF: Ha!

AdminJF: Ah...

AdminJF: Look, I... back when we first met, Josh saw this hungry, pale as death, angry and antisocial freak around his age and, instead of avoiding him like everyone else, sat down right next to him and offered half of his lunch.

AdminJF: I've been through 5 different fosters since he and I first met, CB. Five houses that all took me in and gave me the boot before I could even get comfortable. Within that time, the only other friends I've made apart from him are Clera and Tiff, and the only reason Tiff's our friend is because she and Cler started dating months ago.

AdminJF: I mean, hell, just yesterday, I

AdminJF: shit

CodingB: ?

AdminJF: ... Can you... keep a secret, CB?

CodingB: My lips are sealed, Allen. Is everything alright?

AdminJF: ... I... I lied to Josh, about me running off. About how my folks were mad and I needed to get away from the house for a bit.

AdminJF: The truth is that they... They kicked me out.

CodingB: They?? What!?

AdminJF: Yesterday past-noon, few hours after lunch, not-pops plopped my schoolbag on me, told me to shove as much of my shit in it as I could, and just told me to "get lost". Figured he was joking and I just stared at him cuz, like, why the hell would I think he was serious? But, looking at his face...

AdminJF: So then I said "Let me pack my suitcases while you call the agency" cuz that's how it normally went when my Fosters got sick of me, but mfer pulls me up and goes all "We want you out of here NOW" and tells me that I have ten minutes to fill my bag.

AdminJF: ... And he, uh, really did mean 10 minutes. They weren't lying about that part...

CodingB: Oh my god... That's horrible. They do not deserve to call themselves "parents" of any kind! Are you hurt? Are you okay?

AdminJF: I

AdminJF: I don't know why shit like this still shocks me, y'know? I should be used to it all, and I am for the most part but...

AdminJF: I guess a part of me was thinking that... Things were going well! Things were going better than any of the other families I'd been in! I was with them for almost a full year, like, a month away from it even, and sure, I might've been a bit of an ass sometimes, but they...

AdminJF: Tensions were kinda mounting for the past month or so, I guess, but I didn't notice it until this bs happened. Now most of my shit is in a home I'm not welcome in anymore, the agency probably won't be checking in for another month or so, and I have no goddamn idea what I'll do if Mrs. Freeman comes back and tells me I can't stay here. I'm completely shit outta luck.

CodingB: Allen, I'm so sorry...

CodingB: ... I'm sure... Josh and his mother, they won't leave you on your own like that. You said yourself that Josh is very very kind, for better or for worse. It doesn't matter what you might think about yourself, Allen, you do not deserve to be hurt in any way.

AdminJF:

AdminJF: Christ I spilled my guts like hell

AdminJF: Just one of those fucking

AdminJF: "3am! Time to vent!"

CodingB: Allen, please.

AdminJF: Maybe I could try going back to sleep now...

CodingB: Allen, wait!

CodingB: I. Before you go, please, I

CodingB: Maybe... could you keep a secret of mine too?

AdminJF:

AdminJF: Eh, it's only fair, fine. Go right on ahead.

CodingB: Alright! Alright!

CodingB: I... I'm terrified. Of failing Joshua.

CodingB: Of ending up trapped in this computer for who knows how many more years.

CodingB: Of finally getting out, and... and it all being worse than being trapped in here.

CodingB: Heck, I'm terrified at the thought of it being everything I could've ever dreamed of, so much so that I never want to return to the computer. I... I wouldn't be helpful anymore if that happened...

CodingB: Jeez... am I even helpful where I am now? Apart from keeping the firewall up, what good have I really done to help Joshua or his father?

CodingB: I cannot express to Joshua how... how deeply frightened I am at the thought of him never coming back. That thought haunts my every waking hour when he is not here, and I don't know how to get it to stop. It makes me feel as though I'll crash my entire programming and I hate it so much.

AdminJF: Damn... CB, you know, even just keeping a firewall up is a helluva task all on its own, and it's doing a crapton of good, too. Files are still up and the computer isn't a smouldering pile of viruses now is it?

AdminJF: Besides, even without all of that, you've still helped Josh, like, endlessly. You've supported him a bunch and I know for a fact that you've helped him to feel better about this whole ordeal. Like, he chats about you for HOURS the second you come up in a convo, yo. The minute he gets the chance to, I know he's gonna get you out of there, and, knowing your ingenuity, you're gonna find thousands o' ways to help out.

AdminJF: But... I ain't gonna lie and tell you those feelings are gonna go away. Not on their own. Needs time and reassurance. Until all of this is over and done with and even maybe a good few years afterwards, you're probably gonna still have that fear.

CodingB: Ah... I see... I don't suppose it is normal though, is it?

AdminJF: Nah. I know that first-hand... But hey, we've both made it this far despite all the bullshit we've been through, right? World's not gonna get ridda us that easily.

CodingB: ... Even with the terror I feel, am I still brave enough to face the world?

AdminJF: I'd say the world oughta learn to start being afraid of you, cuz there's nothin' braver than continuing to live even when you're scared to death.

CodingB: ... Thank you. Thank you so very much.

AdminJF: Heh, all in a day... night's work...

AdminJF: Think the both of us could use some rest. Quiet our minds fo' a bit.

CodingB: Heh, agreed... See you tomorrow in that case. Er, well, today. At a later hour.

AdminJF: Yeaaa, see ya then, CBot. Sleep well.

CodingB: You too! May your dreams be filled with nothing scary!

[Emergency Program Inactive]

ampd.program deactivated. Returning to error log...

Decisions

((I really like writing these character-driven scenes))

Nyota settled back comfortably and accepted a bottle of water from Tarvei. “Thank you. Is there anything else I should know at the moment?”

“Not sure there’s much more to tell,” Lumen told her. He pulled a pocket watch out of his vest pocket and checked it, then shut it with a sharp little click. “We got most of them Occasus, think a few ran for it. Arjun’s been chattin’ with Esther and Esther’s botherin’ them folks at the Outpost to figure how they hide their little meteor there. We oughta be able to tuck this place away right safe soon enough.”

“Making contact with the Outpost has been a boon for our camps as well,” Lana said. “The technique is reliable.”

“Good.” Nyota nodded. “You handled that well.” It was reassuring to know she could leave everything in Lumen’s hands if she had to. He was proving ever more capable as her second in command.

“Okay, but you gotta hear all about how the scuffle went, Captain,” Sonny said. She glowed bright, all but sparkling. “See, they had this big robot thing, like the one that went for Hadley. And somebody shot my arm. That wasn’t nice. But then all them wispers woke right up and froze the robot stiff as a fencepost. Then Namina popped in and smacked the ol’ thing to pieces!”

Nyota sat up a little straighter. “Namina is here?”

“Sure is. Brought him and Eldie with me,” Lumen told her. He checked his watch again. “Now, I know yer gonna tell me she ain’t a fighter, but it was her idea.”

“No, I trust your judgment, and hers,” Nyota told him. The thought still sent a sour coil of anxiety through her stomach. Oldarva had learned well, but she was still untried in actual combat… “Were they hurt?”

“Nah, they’re both right as rain,” Lumen told her. He hummed, warm orange glow growing murky. “But I told them to catch up with us when they could. Shoulda been here by now.” He tapped the microphone on his collar. “Hey Ferny, where are ya?”

Namina’s voice crackled through, too quiet for Nyota to pick out the words from where she was sitting. Lumen listened and nodded along. Stopped. Whistled.

The crackling took on a very sharp tone that made Sonny giggle. “Dang, that’s a good swear.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Lumen muttered. “Forgot the mic picks that up so hard. But whatcha mean she caught a prisoner?”

Nyota sat up. Her back twinged; she ignored it. “She what?”

Lumen held up a hand to stall questions as he listened intently to Namina’s voice, humming in quiet surprise as Namina told him the gist. “Well how ‘bout that. Thank ya kindly, y’all just stay there then.”

Nyota waited as Lumen gathered his thoughts, trying to at least seem patient while she burned with questions.

Hadley asked one for her. “What’s this about a prisoner? Occasus don’t surrender.”

Lumen shrugged. “This one did. Eldie said that Fern-fangs already searched them, so we ain’t got a sneak attack or sneak-spy to worry about, no weapons or wireless or nothin’. I dunno what’s up, but I trust Oldarva.” He looked right at Nyota. “She sure knows when a person oughta be spared.”

The words sent a shiver through Nyota and made her fur rise with something that had no relation to cold or fear. “Yes. You’re right.” She closed her eyes and shut out as many distractions as she could, searching her mind for options. “I do not want to leave them alone out there, though. Or send them both back to our ship with a potentially volatile element.”

Tarvei raised a hand. “I’ll go look after them, sis. It’s not a bad run there, and we should get Hadley back to the ship soon anyway.”

“Now hold on,” Hadley cut in, half-rising in indignation before Tarvei’s hand caught her shoulder and gently pushed her back down. It said much of her condition that she did not protest, but fierce resistance still burned in her mauve eyes. “I’m not going anywhere just yet. I want to see what’s back there. Has to be something good after the fight that rock put up.”

“Ya oughta rest,” Lumen told her, and she turned her fiery glare on him. “C’mon, lil’ Firebrand. Ya know I ain’t gonna order ya, it’s no good to push so hard.”

Nyota cleared her throat; Hadley looked down. “We stay together,” she said, quiet but firm, and Hadley looked up again with a mix of confusion and hope. “Lumen, please ask Oldarva to bring her prisoner here. SAIL can keep our ship safe on its own, and I can think of no more secure place right now than the Vault, in either case.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Lumen was thoughtful, she could see that in the bubbling under his shell. But not upset—he was intrigued. “What’s the plan, then?”

Nyota gestured at their makeshift camp. “I’ll warm some rations for us. We will rest here until they arrive, and I will question this captive myself.  I want to see why Oldarva thought them worth saving.”

actual session 8 notes

• I made a mistake

○ Mistake as in I came in late oops

• Anyways

• They're talking abt hair

• For sneak attack you roll 2d6 just a friendly reminder to yourself

○ oH IT TELLS U IN DNDBEYOND HOW MUCH FOR SNEAK ATTACK OKAY

• Now they're talking abt pranking ppl in the rides

• Now they're talking abt disneyland problems

• Now they're talking abt rollercoasters

• Jacob's fish ate each other

• Ok dnd time

○ "no worries" re: me being late s u r e ok nvm it's not depression time

• Passive perception checks and then we do smth idk

• Last session(s)

○ Downtime and then breakfast was bombed

○ Found out the attack was deliberate

○ Went to the one fancy villa house and got into a few fights

○ A nimblewright ?? Was responsible for the attack ig

○ We dipped and it's rainy

• The city is engulfed in thiccccc fog

○ Walking back to mirt's house

§ Lillian got prankt

• Lillian's sister has a guinea pig

○ Its name is buttercup

○ "buttercup dumpy tho" - jacob, 2020

• We're talking abt china's laws wrt eating dogs

• We're in the fog going to mirt's

○ Mirt's house is in sea ward, we're in north ward (a ward away)

○ If we just walk it's a half mile away

○ But there r streets so like a mile walk

○ Visibility is bad bc spring fog

○ Disadvantage on perception checks, visibility reduced to 30 ft

○ We're walking we get there

• Cel knocks

○ No one answers the door

○ Adam is making an investigation check

§ Does a short tour of the front, nothing out of the ordinary

§ Door is locked

§ Looking into the house there's an occasional candle burning by itself

□ Adam uses thaumaturgy to rapidly change the color of the lights inside to see if he can get anyone's attention

® Lights change color, nothing happens

§ Maybe we'll break in but cel will try the pebble on a window thing first

□ Throws, door opens and floon lets us in

□ Mans just got up

® We're a lil wet

□ It's abt 5am

• Short rest? There's no medium rest

○ I want cake I might make cupcakes after this bc I need cake sugar

§ I'll make cake after this and watch criminal minds bc it had me scream

○ We're taking shifts for keeping watch sleeping in mirt's living room w windows facing out onto the street

○ We're taking a long rest

• When cel is on watch she's just watching the door and windows

• Eventually renaer and floon get up n operate on a normal schedule

• Cut straight to wake up

○ Once we're all up it's raining

○ Hi jacob's dad isn't his name frederic ? Oh god I could b v wrong but I'm p sure bc when marguerite named the squirrel someone was like it's jacob's dad

§ "usually what I say should be cut off" - frederic, 2020

§ Aw bye jacob's dad

§ Jacob sounds exactly like his dad

□ Tb to the one time we were playing split the room on jackbox w my cousins and my dad and the choice was trading ur average newborn for an uber smart one or not and all of the cousins and myself said don't trade and mY DAD SAID TRADE

• It's pouring

• Mirt doesn't seem to b here but we can talk to renaer and floon

○ Gonna talk to them abt the mansion n ppl / things at the mansion

○ Oh a nimblewright is the one thing

§ Oops I accidentally googled it and turns out they're employed as bodyguards / assassins / spies

○ "renAer . Do u recognize this symbol"

§ He is indeed familiar w the crest

§ "well to me this looks like the house of grahlund (idk) ?? Or smth"

§ The houses of waterdeep

§ We're suss abt the book

□ We don't see any other black pages tho

§ Adam says the gnome was unfortunately barbecued

□ "trying to deliver the stone of galore" to us probs

□ Y would he deliver it to us

□ "bc mirt is relatively well known ,, this house is probs well watched"

□ The stone of galore v sought after by noble families apparenTly

□ The house ppl r embezzling that's y they want the rock

□ Had their robot blast our door for it

□ But now city watch probably has it

□ Theo remembers the one elven lady having seen someone run off

□ The zents want it, the nobles want it, the citywatch want it

○ So is the plan to go find a zent ??? Or what we'd learn if we went to the robot's location

§ I don't remember any frickin robot I'm just trying to pick up on context clues

§ Oh right grinda in mistshore ? 

§ We're gonna go find grinda

□ It's like around 4 in the afternoon

□ Sun not shining too brightly

□ Renaer not coming

® Ur leaving groot w renaer this time

□ Neither is floon, mirt mentioned he had to go do some business elsewhere

® Adam is currently suspicious of mirt

□ We need a ride

® We all dish out 3 copper for a taxi

® Dom dabbed and no one cares

○ Can u drop a message to the guy ?? Somehow ?? Somewhere ?? Just like ,, keep him in the loop ???? Ur confused

• Ok we pay

○ Adam is playing the uke

§ We're in the cab 

§ Imagine it's raining aggressively

§ A dwarf guild member picks us up

§ Ugh I want cake

§ Could I bake while playing hm

§ Cab driver has a rigging of sorts set up

§ I have to pee too

§ Any interesting looking ppl in the cab w us ?

○ A gnome w a fedora looking p drenched, dragonborn woman half sleeping kinda elderly, human man

§ Adam slaps the gnome, you stare at the gnome, gnome looks at adam and adam runs an insight check adam rolls 23, gnome tries to look surprised but looks like he's overacting

§ "there's not a lot of big ideas here"

§ "well that's obvious enough"

§ Gnome picks up on stare

§ You get the paper you flip it, you roll for insight gets 22

□ Takes the bait, looks at the paper; eventually human gets off

□ We're getting close to outskirts of dock ward, road is mud

□ At some point the gnome tries to start conversation

□ "say what's that you've got there"

□ "well I only saw him at the carnival that shows up every fall"

® Common in the autumn but not nowadays

® Would have to wait another summer

□ "are you a nimblewright fanatic sir"

® "all I'm saying is I like springtime rain as much as the next guy but when the wind season comes in it's kinda unusual"

® Gnome's name is elbridge

◊ Adam rolls for insight

} 25

} Looks like he's used to saying that name but it might not be his name

® "say I have some business to attend to so driver u can keep the tip just don't tell the guild" dwarf nods and slows the horses down, gnome gets off and dips

• Adam wants him to blow a nose

• "did he leave any little hairs" - marguerite, 2020

○ Cab driver shouts and says no stabbing on the cart

• We're in the dock ward, cart stops and dwarf leans over and makes us get out

○ Shakes his head and says we shouldn't go to mistborne

○ "is there any instruction you can give us for how to 'get there get there' because you're not 'taking us taking us'" - adam, 2020

• Aerana's leading

○ Dom sends a map

○ We're not standing on the muddy running water streets but on wooden planking

○ You have your dagger at hand

○ Beached ships but ppl living inside them probably

○ U can see there r some ppl peeking out of various doorways + shifty characters milling abt

○ Cel and adam r holding hands

○ Adam is sweating a lot but cel still holds it

○ At some point a dragonborn that looks like a sailor or smth w lots of battlewounds n tattoos looks p savage w dull brown color to scales, stands in front of u without saying anything

○ Ur like a lil shorter than humans and dragonborn r much taller

§ "I have business in mistborne what are you doing in my way"

§ Not so many city types

§ Adam mumbles smth under his breath

□ Asks adam what kind of business

□ "we're looking for grinda"

® Tries to appear jovial

® Says ah yes she lives here

® Dragon therapy

◊ He takes and puts to temple 

◊ U pay him 3 gold

◊ Grinda garloff

} Strange woman w a shed at the end of the dock

} Take a left here and follow the sounds of the waves

} Throws out a fourth

– Has many visitors w strange visitors

◊ Cel says she likes his tattoos

} "yes these r when I was sailing around the isle of chault"

• We follow his directions and eventually get to d1, we see ppl trying to set a fire

○ Walk down the dock towards d2, door to north of d2 has small assemblage of ppl

○ Can see up to 60 ft away some odd looking ppl

§ Four thugs bearing weapons; three humans w a dwarf barking instructions, attempting to break down the door to d2

§ Might b grinda's house but we really don't know

§ Adam spruces up the one fire of the dock workers

□ Cel lets go of adam's hand

□ They don't notice adam did it

• Adam tries to hear what the dwarf is saying bc it's rainy and doesn't hear anything

○ Lots of shifty ppl around

○ Some of them r watching the scene and also us

○ We approach the audience

§ Adam nudges the friendliest looking person

§ We all go up onto the elevated ship

§ Immediately ppl look at us suss

□ Confrontational almost and eventually a half-elf woman asks us if we're here to watch them string up grinda

® Cel makes persuasion check

® Isn't there another door ?

® Adam goes to cushiest looking person and asks y they're after grinda

◊ Old grizzled halfling answers adam and says grinda took smth she wasn't supposed to have

◊ "we're here to make sure that grinda doesn't escape unharmed"

◊ "we're pretty tough as well" adam says

◊ More ppl come over closer to us

◊ Adam asking how much it would be to outbuy

◊ "that depends on how much you're asking oh wrinkly one"

◊ Halfling confers w fellows

◊ Halfling appears to be a ringleader

} Says 15 dragons

– 19 for insight

w Confident guy, lived a tough life

w Ppl put their trust in him

w Halfling says 15 is bargain price

w Unsuccessful try to push the price down you all cough up 3 dragons

– They start distributing dragons

w Not used to containing excitement

○ After distributing money asks if we have a bone to pick with the xants

§ Adam's gonna play them a song and plays it so hard it casts shatter on the dock the thugs are standing on

□ Constitution saving throws for everything

® Two of the bandits and the dwarf fail their saving throws, other two succeed

® Tl;dr the dock - two of them r shocked so hard they're either dead or unconscious

® Dwarf Is particularly affected

® Dock they're standing on collapses

® Door blasted off inwards

◊ "that's a little trick I learned at bard school"

◊ Ppl on the boat have moved away

® Humans and dwarves screaming

◊ 3 left

} We're not killing them just going into the house

} Go to the side entrance

– V small room w all bare necessary fixtures

– Strange safes n intricate bolted locks

– Hanging talismans from the roof

– Nvm went too fast

w Aerana jumps and runs into a wall but you run into a cabinet

w 3 damage

w Human woman looks unconscious

w Adam casts healing word

w Resuscitates her

w Has mismatched eyes, one yellow other dark green

w V gray hair

w Doesn't look particularly old just has gray hair

w Startles when she wakes up trying to assess our intentions

w Adam tries to convince her the thugs outside tried to blow up her door

w 18 for deception

w Lie works

w "who are you people?"

® Theo asks if she knows anything abt this *pulls out paper*

◊ Affirms we're not w the xants

◊ "I appreciate what you did my name's grinda"

◊ Doesn't look used to talking to this many ppl at once

◊ Stands up and busies herself w putting the room back in order

◊ Looks like she had been barricading the door w stuff before everything was knocked over

◊ "you're telling me you just happened across this place and drove off some xants for some odd purpose"

◊ "actually we were looking for you" - theo

◊ Were told she might have smth to do w the paper

◊ "all the homies hate xanathar" - adam, 2020

} "I've had my dealings w the xanathar before…" admits she was in over her head

} Looking at the paper "so this nimblewright was instructed to drop off an artifact I was supposed to hold for the xanathars

} She got greedy bc she's a treasure-seeker

} The artifact is worth a lot

} "it's just what we do lady" - adam, 2020

} Adam is gonna charm her

– Adam tries to flex "what exactly what was the dangerous item that put a poor, poor, well-facially featured woman like you in danger" what is this jacob

w 17 persuasion

– Her expression changes a little

– It's the stone

w "I was attempting to attune with it but I was unable to in time"

w She put it in a hide hole

w Adam offers to trade hidey-hole locations

w She has a rat familiar and instructed it to take the stone to the city of the dead

w "can you tell the rat to bring it back"

• The city of the dead: mass cemetery where ppl of waterdeep bury their dead within city limits

○ Almost like its own ward

○ In the garlock? Garlof? family mausoleum

○ Adam gets her to pull out some of the items she's collected; some resistance

§ She comes back w a brass ring

□ Once one is attuned to it you are rendered invisible

□ "hold on to that for me hun and I'll come back"

○ Aerana is aware there are guards posted at night but it's a vast open space

• To the cemetery we will go

• Summary

○ Successfully dispatched the thugs

○ Gradually learning more abt the alleged horde of dragons

Hatchling

Day One

Gotta do this for two weeks right? Let’s get this show on the road.

(I better edit this before I turn it in.)

I’m naming my ‘baby’ Tabitha. She’s two ounces in weight. I might be crocheting her a hat. Her shell is a pale white, and I hope I can raise her well enough so she grows up well-adjusted and with a solid start in life… or at least well enough so I get an A on this project.

She’s sleeping beside me, close to the lamp but like not RIGHT beneath it, I’m making sure she won’t be too warm. Her matchbox bed’s super cute too, I doodled little pink flowers on it with my highlighter. It might just be a fucking egg but I gotta take care of it, right?

Day Two                

Apparently not everyone in class wanted to name their egg baby. Lame. They don’t know how to have fun. My friend Joshua named his Zane. I’ve offered to make a baseball cap for him out of foam. He’s happily accepted and asked me to style it like our school mascot. It’s gonna be hard to make a ram on the tiny foam, but I’ll do my best. I might have a C minus in this life skills class but I’m acing Art.

Tabitha was good today. I did everything I was supposed to. Dripped salt water on it to mimic feeding it milk, making sure it’s not too hot or too cold, and I’m making her a few more hats. I’m really getting into this ‘mother’ thing.

Day Three

Aiden almost made me drop my egg today.

I was showing off the completed hat when he tried to swipe Tabitha from my hands. I’m just glad I got good reflexes. Otherwise cue an immediate fail. I asked what the heck his problem was and he called me a bunch of names that basically revolve around me having a penis. R.U.D.E.

Maybe I’m too committed to this baby project but Mr. Kraft really appreciates it. Gonna score that A along with the rest of the kids in class who are taking this seriously. Aiden has apparently stored his egg in a shoebox under his bed. I can’t imagine how much it’s gonna stink when he takes it out to be graded.

Day Four

Not much happened today. I’m spending all my time making hats for Tabitha and the other people in class who love that I’m really customizing my egg. Some people have drawn lil faces on their eggs, Joshua drew a mustache on Zane.

Overall though, Tabitha is the child I’d want in real life. Quiet. Not bothersome. And I can put her in cute hats!

Day Five

Crap. Crap Crap crap.

I’m worried Tabitha’s rotting. Like. I’m pretty sure there’s something been done to these eggs to make that not happen? But there’s like this spot on the bottom that was NOT there before.

It wasn’t there during school, I let Mr. Kraft examine her during class so he could check my progress. I can’t blame him, everyone brought in their eggs. Aiden made up a bullshit excuse about how he forgot it but like I’m pretty sure he dropped it and it broke. Moron. Either way he got marked down so not my problem.

My problem IS the black spot on Tabitha. I’ve bathed her and attempted to rub it off, it’s kinda fuzzy like mildew and leaves a stain like it, but I’m so worried I’ll get marked down for it. I’ll talk to Mr. Kraft after the weekend.

Day Six

Welp.

The fuzziness is back, and the black stain’s spreading across the egg. Weird part is that Tabitha doesn’t smell like spoiled eggs. She doesn’t smell GOOD though, kinda like burnt hair? I’ve burned my hair enough trying to figure out a curling iron to know what that smells like.

I let my mom look at her, and she’s just as puzzled. But she made me feel better, told me that she knew I was taking super good care of Tabitha and this is just like a real baby in a sense. Sometimes they get sick and there’s just no reason behind it, I didn’t do anything wrong. I just gotta keep up dripping salt water on her and trying to clean her off.

Day Seven

Yeah. Tabitha’s gone entirely fuzzy. Like a furby. A black, smelly furby. The fluff’s thick like the toy, not quite fuzzy like mildew.

I’m so embarrassed. I’ve called Joshua to see if he knows what to do but he won’t pick up the damn phone. I guess he’s just busy with practicing for the next big game Wednesday. Go Rams! But anyway I’ll just show Tabitha to the teacher tomorrow, and if he fails me, I’ll try to bargain up to a D. Since I honestly did nothing and my mom can vouch for it. My egg’s just gone weird.

Day Eight

Mr. Kraft wasn’t in so we had a substitute. When I showed her the egg, she seemed more distracted by my voice but after I steered her back on the right topic she told me to keep following instruction and Mr. Kraft will handle grading.

Joshua’s out sick too. Boo. I miss him.

Day Nine

I swear. My egg moved.

Like Aiden was hassling me again about taking Tabitha everywhere and was about to swat her again when she just rolled out of the way. Aiden took off running after that. I swear he looked pale. I can’t blame him. That. Was weird.

I must be imagining things. Maybe the air from Aiden’s hand made her move? That’s the only reason I can think of.

Day Ten

I thought I was going to die today.

I was going to the bathroom when I felt someone grab me by the hair and drag me into the men’s room. I screamed and started punching frantically. I was gonna be another statistic, I just knew it. But it was Aiden, and for once, he wasn’t calling me slurs or out to make my life annoying.

He told me that his egg was gone.

It’d happened the morning of the five day check. He’d gone under his bed to get his egg Agatha (he apparently had the habit of calling her Aggie for short) and she was. Gone. He showed me the shoebox and it had pieces of fluff like the stuff covering Tabitha along with bits of eggshell and this nasty smelling dried black gunk.

He asked me if Tabitha had moved anymore. I pulled her from the cute lil carrier I made for her and set her on the counter.

Tabitha’s moving all the time now. Wiggling like a Mexican Jumping Bean. It’s not too noticeable when she’s in the pouch but when she’s free roaming it’s obvious it’s not just air currents. Aiden looked ready to piss himself, and I was pretty damn close too.

I put her back in the pouch and told him that I’ll try to find Mr. Kraft and ask him where he got these eggs. But other than that, I really didn’t know what to do. Maybe this is some weird mutant chicken, or maybe the egg just combusted under the heat of Aiden’s bed.

I took Tabitha to the game tonight in attempts to find Joshua and see if the same thing is happening to his egg, but he’s not there. I’m getting worried.

Before I go to Mr. Kraft, I’m going to Joshua’s house tomorrow to see if he’s okay.

Day Eleven

Tabitha hatched.

It happened after my mom left. I was almost done getting ready when I heard something like a twig snapping. I paused and just looked over at Tabitha.

Her egg was dripping a clear, oily substance. I pulled up a chair and sat over her, watching. I had to see what came out.

It wasn’t really what came out, it was more like… what unfolded.

Like a starfish, her legs unwrapped from her body and she stood up on all six of them, her body no bigger than my hand. Her head craned up, its dozen black eyes staring at me as the comically pink hat I’d made for her sat on her abdomen.

Then she went for my face.

I’m hiding in the bathroom now, towels stuffed under the door. I can hear Tabitha squeaking, she’s really desperate to get in here. She’s torn a good chunk out of my cheek and neck. Nothing vital but holy shit her teeth are like razors. I’m lucky she didn’t take out an eye.

I’ve called 911 and I’m waiting now, armed with toilet cleaner and trying to stem the bleeding with a washcloth.

I really hope they get here soon.

Day who the fuck cares, this is clearly not for the project anymore.

I needed a few dozen stitches. For the first attack and the second, after she managed to get through the vent into the bathroom. She tore quite a few hunks out of my calf before someone burst in. They described her like a rat the way she scurried down the bathroom drain.

I will absolutely have scars on my face, but eh. I didn’t really how I looked anyway.

… Joshua’s dead.

So is Aiden. And another student from our class, Hannah. They were found in their rooms, their throats ripped out and several chunks from their bodies eaten. The eggs must’ve hatched when they were sleeping, and Aggie must’ve returned to the bedroom for a snack. Joshua’s dad didn’t know until he got home Wednesday and smelled Joshua’s body. He’d been out of town. But I think Aiden’s and Hannah’s parents are dead too. The little fuckers got greedy.

I keep just thinking about Joshua. We’ve been friends since we were kids. I can’t stop thinking about the one time we missed the bus and it was raining. We just looped arms and started running home, even though it was pouring. Our moms were furious. We were soaking wet and covered in mud. I think Joshua got a small sniffle. It was the best day.

And he’s gone. He’s gone.

A lot of the other kids in class were injured. Some of their eggs hadn’t hatched yet, those were taken into evidence apparently and Mr. Kraft’s being investigated for the deaths of his students.

Somehow I think they’re never going to find him.

A New Day One

Tabitha’s back.

She didn’t try to kill me this time though. I woke up and she was sprawled across my chest like a damn cat. I screamed and sat up so fast she went flying across the room. But she came back, crawled up on the bed. I was ready to squash her like a fly when she sat on my hand.

Just sat there. She knew I could kill her. And she chose to stay.

Maybe she imprinted on me. You know, before she tried to eat my face. That’s what baby ducks do.

I’ve put her in an old fish tank for now, and I’ve found she’ll hunt mice if I let her out during the day. She vomits up their half dissolved skeletons. I’ve been buying some for her too so she doesn’t get hungry. She likes them a lot. She purrs after a good feed and sits on my lap while I do my homework, rumbling away.

I can’t bring myself to get rid of her. She’s my baby, after all.

the ryden song (FAKE)

okay, so we were realizing that for some of our analysis of v&v, we need to set the scene. so here we go. time to get a loot of hate. i’m also going to mention a couple other songs. also bear with me. my thoughts on this are a little wild and this is going to be a long analysis. it’s also a long song so..

anyway, i’m just gonna start off with the fact that this song, lyrically, had a lot of confusing parts and this was a pain in the ass to try and translate into something that made sense. (also, why is this the ryden song ??? this, to me and my opinions, is soooo not romantic) ALSO DISCLAIMER. this blog is something I’m doing for fun, i have 0 confirmed facts besides the things that i am taking within my own context. this doesn’t mean i have solved the puzzle and you are more than welcome to disagree.

and we’re getting right into this shit show. i guess i also need to point out, if it’s not obvious from my analysis on always, i’m not a fan of ryden. i just never saw the chemistry and i’m also really far up dallon weekes’s ass that i can’t function, so, just roll with me, please.

ALSO SIDE NOTE, i’ll mention it when i talk about the lyrics but certain lines are going to have the “..” in it. ALSO AGAIN, i believe this song is written solely by ryan so, just, ya know, mindsets and shit.

If all our life is but a dream

Fantastic posing greed

Then we should feed our jewelry to the sea

For diamonds do appear to be

Just like broken glass to me

so this first line i’m not really going too in depth on. it seems kinda blunt, honestly. though i am exchanging ‘life’ for ‘relationship’. basically, if all of our relationship (ryden) is just a dream (for the future, please keep the wizard of oz in mind). then it goes into fantastic posing greed. this is going to seem like a bit of a long shot cause i haven’t dived into the rest of the song. but anyway, again, as i’ve said a million times, i think ryden was one sided on brendon’s part. i think to ryan, it was just sex. he didn’t want a romantic relationship but boy did brendon. i think ryan led him on for a lot of the time that ryan was in panic. so this is coming to me as kind of a break up song in a sense. a warning break up song? he’s kind of saying that when brendon gets greedy (when he asks for ryan to love him) it’s over. now, sue me, it seems a little fucked up to say that, don’t you think? brendon has been led on, he thinks that they have something that’s just, for the time being, unofficial. brendon isn’t wrong to ask for love if this relationship has been happening for awhile which i think it has. so ryan could be calling it fake greed. ryan is saying that brendon is being greedy but i think even ryan knows that its not really greedy to ask for such a thing, it’s really just normal. i mean, you can’t force somebody to love you but at that point you should leave, right? it’s kinda like brendon is asking do you or don’t you. the posing could also be ryan trying to make it more obvious it’s him. he’s faking it. if he was very blunt that he wasn’t in love, i think that it wouldn’t have ended so dramatically, ya know? if ryan wasn’t lying and.. wait for it.. posing, things wouldn’t have hurt brendon so much.

now on that note, i’m gonna bring in a different song. ryan’s new band is called the young veins and they have a song titled ‘cape town’ and we’re all wondering what happened in cape town. in case you don’t already know, that was the last show ever played before ryan and jon left the band. so the lyric:

Woke me in the morning

Asked me if I meant it, I didn't

now, screw off, i’m not analyzing that whole song so fuck the rest of the lyrics. but this is kinda how i envisioned things ending. it also goes back to the greed. fantastic posing greed was kind of a warning for the future. ryan was saying, when you start getting greedy, when you finally ask me to love you, this is 100% over and that could be what happened in cape town. they’re laying in bed together after a wonderful night of sex (cause, remember, i’m theorizing that this relationship was sexsexsesexeesx). brendon woke him to beautiful rays of sunshine and he smiled, he asked ryan if he loved brendon and guess the answer? no. ryan admitted that he didn’t love brendon and it broke brendon because he’d been trying to believe for a long time that they were in love.

anyways, back to panic. he says that they should feed their jewelry to the sea. now, i can’t give you a 100% estimate or anything but this isn’t something that happy couples do. my sister mentioned that in divorces (not like it’s a practice but some people, also breakups, people who are extra), they throw their wedding rings into the ocean, sea, lake, river, body of water. i also remember in decoy bride (fave movie) the main character (and this is gonna sound wild but it’s soooo worth the watch and like,,, spoilers i guess sorry) went through a fake wedding with the other main character. she wore the ring and then all the old ladies thought she was really married. anyway, shit happens and he leaves her. she still has the ring and this rock these old ladies painted to look  like a bride. (also this takes place on an island) so she’s sad that he went off and married his real love and left her cause she fell blah blah blah. she’s leaving the island on a boat and throws the ring (or the rock i can’t remember) into the ocean. so,,, personal experience. ANYWAY, END OF RELATIONSHIPS, YA KNOW? it’s not something that she did when she was happy, nor will it be happy for ryden.

then the thing about diamonds and broken glass. broken glass is useless. you drop a glass on the floor and you sweep it up and throw it away. he’s comparing that to a diamond which is commonly used on engagement rings and wedding rings. so essentially, he’s saying that marriage is pointless between him and brendon. there’s no point to him because he’s not in love with brendon and he never will be.

GOD, that one fucking verse was wild, i tell you.

And then [s]he said [s]he can't believe

Genius only comes along

In storms of fabled foreign tongues

Tripping eyes, and flooded lungs

Northern downpour sends its love’

okay, this is another one that stumped us for a long fucking time. so i put brackets around the ’s’ in she because i don’t think that ryan is actually talking about a she. since this is the (anti) ryden song, it only makes sense to bring it down to he. he said he can’t believe. so i think that brendon was blinded by love (i’m gonna bring this up again in just a sec). brendon is essentially putting ryan on this pedestal because he’s so in love. you know that feeling where you’re like ‘they can do no wrong, they are perfect in every sense’ and then you break up and look back like ‘wtf was i doing they’re fucked up?’ that’s what brendon is doing. brendon is calling ryan a genius and ryan is saying, no, he isn’t because he’s not being a good person to brendon. a good person would have ended things when he realized brendon was in love (cause it was probably painfully obvious). a good person wouldn’t use somebody for sex the way ryan is. ryan is saying he isn’t a genius and lowkey saying he’s a bad person. brendon doesn’t believe him though. brendon can’t believe that a genius only exists in fairytales.

so just, breaking down that lyric so it’s easier to understand. fables are fairytales. i usually hear fables being used when it’s not like a common american one if that makes sense. like i have a story book on norwegian fables, you see? also makes sense why it’s foreign tongues because fables would originally be spoken in a different language. so again, brendon is saying that he can’t believe that genius (ryan) only exist in fairytales.

so now, this is fun. i say that every time don’t i? so i know i keep pushing answering questions and things back but like, just roll with it. i already said brendon was blinded by love but i want to amend that real quick. he was high on love. so i’m gonna have like 20 paragraphs on weed at the end of this so it’ll make sense later on but i’m going to be talking about a very specific strain of weed (yes, there are a lot of different kinds and types of weed) (*side eye emoji*).  anyway, i wanna save the name of this for later cause spoilers but, this specific strain when you first smoke it, users say that you first feel it behind your eyes and also temporal lobe. so, fun fact. also, high on love. when you’re high (personal experience?? i’ll never say), you don’t see things right. you really, really don’t. especially if it’s a hallucinogenic. weed is not a hallucinogenic but hasn’t panic already admitted that they wrote one song while on shrooms (WHICH IS A HALLUCINOGENIC)? so with that, we’re going with the fact that ryan is saying he’s not seeing things properly, it’s affecting his mind (COUGH COUGH drugs). because of this, he doesn’t see the downpour.

now, there was a post on tumblr that was saying this song was about seattle washington (and did you know i’m a Pacific Northwest (PNW) native???) which is kinda cool for me cause the PNW is *mainly* oregon and washington but i think it might be a lil of idaho (maybe? idk. washington and oregon for sure though). so anyway, rain and downpour are basically what the PNW is known for. and we can’t count my opinion here cause i actually love the rain. i think it’s beautiful. but then again, i’m a native and it’s super common for me. but people who aren’t from around here often categorize rain and clouds as depressing. you wouldn’t believe how many times i have been asked if i get depressed cause it’s always so gray here and rainy. i’m very quick to defend the PNW because i love the greenness of the trees but that’s irrelevant. so, i know just cause it says north doesn’t mean that it’s seattle or PNW related but i’ll explain that also later (GOD admin why can’t you hurry?).

SO ANYWAY, a lot of the rain that we get here comes from the…… north. northern downpour. hmmm. also, finishing that lyric, what could northern downpour sending it’s love mean? if we’re going with the common thought that rain is depressing, northern downpour would be like mass depression, right? now, i know you’re asking why i skipped flooded lungs so, here we go.

a lot of people have categorized that being depressed feels like you’re drowning. i’ve felt that way. you can’t breathe and it’s a lot terrifying. so the downpour of depression, ryan is saying is going to kill brendon. when brendon finds out, the depression is going to kill him. (not saying suicidal but,,,). i’m also just going to bring this up real quick. people say that when you’re drowning, right before you die, you get a moment of bliss. now, if ryan is saying that downpour is coming when brendon finds out it’s fake (remember, this song is a warning so it hasn’t happened yet. that’s cape town AFTER pretty odd has been released) then the moment of bliss is happening right now. brendon is drowning but he just doesn’t know it. maybe the drowning is anxiety (which i will touch on, you guessed it, later). HMM HMM HMM.

The ink is running toward the page

It's chasin' off the days

Look back at both feet

And that winding knee

“I missed your skin when you were east”

You clicked your heels and wished for me

back in the old days when people used ink to write and ya had to dip it, imagine spilling that. like you dip your quill or whatever in the bottle and bump the ridge of the top as your pulling your hand towards the page to write. the ink is going to fall towards your notebook, not away. now, that shit probably splatters and ruins the page quickly. just for this, we’re going to imagine all of that in slow motion since when this song was written, their relationship (read relationship as fuck buddies and brendon hoping that ryan loves him) doesn’t end until cape town which is after they’ve toured for this album. so the ink is running towards the page. the page is their relationship. ryan is saying that when brendon starts asking too much, when he realizes, is when the ink ruins the page. their relationship ends because you can’t fix something like that, really. it’s chasing off the days is just saying what i already did.

now this was a challenge. i say that about everything but just fuck it all. when you’re standing you don’t like, turn your head and look at your feet, it doesn’t work that way. my sister was the one who first kind of inspired the final thought. she was saying, so imagine like, ryan is leaning forward. now the way it is in my head isn’t plausible but just, imagine. like 45* angle at his ankles. the past is where their relationship is, where his feet are, his head is in the present. ryan’s head isn’t in this relationship. there’s no love, no affection (you can also read head as heart). but his dick, which is farther back than his head and heart, is farther back. so anyway, that was what inspired my thought.

what if they’re in bed. since i’m saying that their relationship was purely sexual. now i’m going to try really hard to avoid sex positions in this because the whole argument over who tops is a thing (maybe?? idk ryden stuff). so anyway, i don’t know about you but like, if i was laying on my stomach in bed (which is commonly where you have sex), i don’t crawl out of bed ass first. if i do, i would love (BAAAACK) to where i’m going. he’s looking back at his feet. backwards is also a metaphor for the past. now this is a little confusing i think and you might say I’m contradicting but just, hopefully i can write this out. when you enter a friends with benefits situation it’s usually like, agreed that no feelings will happen. i don’t think that’s how they started though. i think that when this first started ryan might have had like a crush on brendon or thought that hey, MAYBE i could love him. i think that’s how things started but then quickly changed into, hey he’s good at sex but fuck no, i could never love him. i just think that ryan knew that if he told brendon that there weren’t any feelings anymore then the sex would stop. lot’s of artists have said that relationships are hard on the rode because of the lack of intimacy. ryan wants the intimacy of sex but if he tells brendon that he can’t love him, the sex will stop.

so again, he’s looking back at the past when he thought that there maybe would be something. but now, all that’s left is a winding knee. WITHOUT NAMING TOP AND BOTTOM, one person is on their back and they wrap (wind) their legs around the other person’s hips. it’s missionary position, the most intimate (romantic) of them all. i think brendon probably liked this one. so anyway, the current relationship is just the winding knee because the love that ryan might have felt is long since in the past.

now, you might have noticed that ‘i missed your skin when you were east’ is the first lyric to get the “..” that i mentioned. the reason why it got that is i think this is ryan mocking brendon. i don’t think this is ryan saying that he misses brendon when brendon is gone. i think that it’s ryan pretending to be brendon (since he knows that brendon is in love with him) and saying that when ryan leaves, when they’re on break from tour, brendon misses him. this ties into the next line.

when ryan is gone, brendon wishes for him.

i mentioned earlier (about the dream) to remember wizard of oz. this is why. ‘you clicked your heels and wished for me’. in the movie, dorothy clicks her heels and makes a wish. correct me if i’m wrong since it’s been awhile but when dorothy makes her wish, she wakes up from her dream. like ryan comparing their relationship to a dream. when brendon starts wishing for more (time, more something) with ryan is when the dream is over, their relationship is over. It can also be taken as Ryan telling Brendon that he is everything Brendon has dreamed of. As far as we know, Brendon never had a real relationship with anyone before Ryan, but he wanted someone. He wished for Ryan and Ryan knew.

i’m also just going to mention a couple other things from the movie. first off, the plot is them going to the emerald city which is going to be of more importance (or maybe just a coincidence and i’m crazy) a little later. but seattle is called the emerald city. just another chin scratching moment.

Through playful lips made of yarn

That fragile Capricorn

Unraveled words like moths upon old scarves

I know the world's a broken bone

But melt your headaches, call it home

okay, this first line leads into the third so it’ll come up again but anyway. playful means sex. and yarn means words. basically, this means, words said during sex. now, subconsciously, maybe a little consciously, brendon can tell that it’s one sided but he thinks that if he keeps having sex, if he pleases ryan sexually, then ryan will love him. capricorn, yes, is a zodiac but i looked it up and nobody is. capricorn, though, does symbolize hard work. so we’re going with brendon having this mindset that sex=love. his fragile hardwork is all of these words and attempts that he’s making to try and essentially convince ryan to love him. ryan calls it a fragile attempt because he knows it’s not going to work. he’s tearing down each attempt in his mind because he doesn’t want to love brendon. he just wants good sex. now going into the next line. unraveled words (also actions) is ryan tearing down these advances. remember how i said that the yarn was words? words form sentences, paragraphs, books, yadda yadda. yarn forms scarves. also, moths eat holes through old clothes and things in attics that sit there for years. so he’s saying that ryan tearing down these advances is ryan being a moth. he’s eating through brendon’s attempt to make a romantic relationship.

so here’s where people really start hating me. ryan told brendon to pay special attention to this line. he told them that this meant a lot. tons of people take this in a loving way but i don’t think so at all. now, going back to the beginning. remember how i said that brendon couldn’t believe that ryan wasn’t a genius? that kind of thinking leads me to believe that it was almost like brendon worshipped ryan to an extent. that ryan was his world. so i think this is ryan being straight up and blunt. also, broken bones can’t really be fixed. once the bone is broken, it will never go back to being perfect. it heals, yes, but they’re essentially deformed. there’s a build up where the break was. something that is no longer be looked at as perfect can be taken as being shitty. that’s the easiest way for me to make this make sense. here’s my translation:

“i know that i (ryan) and a shitty person”

and the next line honestly bothers. me.

so without assuming things about people, just knowledge, chronic headaches and migraines are kind of unavoidable. you can take pain medicine but you can’t prevent them 100%. i know people who have these sort of headaches and they can be literally debilitating. my sister knows someone who, during school, is on the verge of tears because the pain is so intense and things like that can’t just be willed away. there are headaches that your brain is like ‘hey, take care of yourself’ but those are lesser in pain, just a ‘pay attention to me right quick’ sort of thing. so the way he says this is kind of.. odd. melt your headaches? as if you can just get rid of chronic headaches, just will them away. fun fact guys, you can’t. the way this comes out to me is just ‘get over it. deal with it’. if we put the two lines together it comes out as this.

“i am a shitty person so get over it.”

kinda rude, don’t you think?

also, pointing out things. “i know the worlds a broken bone, but melt your headaches, call it home”  is where brendon broke down on stage. maybe realizing what it actually meant? the only other song that he’s broken down while singing is casual affair and, well, didn’t i mention that this was a casual affair to ryan? oop.

so pre chorus time.

“Hey moon, please forget to fall down

Hey moon, don't you go down”

again, in the “…” cause this is ryan mocking brendon. so first, i’m going to bring in two songs.

“when the day met the night” by panic at the disco off of pretty odd. THIS SONG seems more like a ryden song than northern downpour:

When the moon fell in love with the sun

so this song to me, is written by brendon for ryan. this is brendon’s i love you to ryan. now before we go on, ryan is the moon and brendon is the sun. i could go on about personality traits and why specifically but i’m just not gonna right now.

“stall me” by panic at the disco off vices & virtues (i think it was like a bonus or pre order extra).

Why would you bring me in if you knew what you'd become?

So curse everyone and everything, even the sun

so i know that it doesn’t say moon but i’m pretty sure this is about ryan. now mind you, this came after pretty odd. this is after cape town, after his heart has been broken. this is basically brendon asking why ryan would lead him on if he knew that he would never love brendon. then brendon says fuck everyone and everything (common when you’re upset and pissed off to hate everything). what kills me is he says ‘even the sun’. brendon is the sun. he says fuck himself for falling and trying to believe.

anyways, those are two more examples of the reoccurrence of the sun and moon theme. unnecessary i guess.

so if we’re back to the hey moon part, i said that it was ryan mocking brendon. so mythology and stuff, not going too in depth (if you want me to then like, send an ask and i can do like a hardcore analysis on context of sun and moon vs relationships). the sun and the moon can’t be in love. day and night cannot be in love. one dies while the other survives and they are never together. as the sun is setting the moon is rising, ya know? what brendon is asking of ryan (the moon) is for him to not go away when the sun rises in the morning. he asks for ryan to forget to fall down, don’t go down. ryan is mocking brendon’s attempts to ask for ryan to love him (through sex). ryan knows that they can’t be in love so he’s mocking brendon because brendon still has hope.

i would also like to point out that in the live at chicago version (free on spotify for your listening fun), ryan acknowledges that he is the moon. duh, since he wrote it. but it just proves that if i am wrong about literally all of this, i got at least who the sun and moon is right. when they’re singing ‘hey moon don’t you go down,’ ryan ad libs “never will”. and i get that it can be taken as ryan saying ‘i’ll never go down, i’ll wait for you’ but this song doesn’t lead me to believe that’s what he meant. i think that ‘never will’ is more towards when “brendon” is asking him to forget to fall down. so basically, the way i see it, ryan is saying he’s not going to forget to go down, he will go down because he is the night and he has to. ALSO, in that live version, the never will isn’t like, super pumped and happy or even passionate. it’s kinda bland. doesn’t sound very in love to me.

Sugarcane in the easy mornin'

Weathervanes my one and lonely

OKAY THIS WAS MY FAVORITE. so there was a lot of research about this first fucking lyric and i’m sorry that i’m going to pull so many facts out but, this shit had me on the edge of my seat.

so at first, my sister was saying that sugarcane was weed. this whole album was written while high, i bet my life on it. brendon’s also said that he smoked while in high school and openly fucking admits to smoking weed currently so this isn’t a stretch in my opinion. now, my sister saw sugarcane and went ‘plant’ and was like wow, must mean weed. i wasn’t so convinced. i told her to look up strains of weed that had to do with candy. turns out there is a strain of weed called kandy kush. a little more digging by the 14 year old wonder and we found something even better. you can probably guess it’s name. sugar kush. now these next paragraphs are just gonna kinda seal my theory, alright? feel free to skip if you’re that bored of my rambles but, this shit was wild. connections up the wazoo.

now, fun fact. sugar kush is actually a cross between kandy kush and hash plant. which honestly had me laughing at the whole fucking everything, i dunno. a lot of the affects of sugar kush are relaxation. brendon has said that he’s ADHD which, i’m sure you know but still, means hyperactive. the boy can’t be still for more than a second. so sugar kush is commonly said by users to be ‘couch-locking’ which, from my understanding, is kinda like ‘i’m so fucking high that i can’t get off this couch’ or ‘i’m so fucking relaxed..’. now, since brendon is a hyperactive person, i don’t think that the couch-lock, will happen to him. i think that since he’s on a higher level than someone like me, it would bring him down to feeling like someone without ADD/ADHD rather than the couch-lock. it’s also common that sugar kush makes people happy and euphoric. now, just saying, sex doesn’t usually happen if you’re depressed. it’s hard to get your dick hard when you’re crying, alright? happy makes the dick hard. bluntest (BLUNT LOL) way of saying this.

now, there were a couple different webpages so i’m not gonna say this brief section is like a done deal. this was ‘most popular in:’ and one of the places listed is albany, oregon. which, heyo, is in the PNW.

so anyway, there was a description of the sugar kush. what type it is, who made it, things like that. then, i shit you not, (also, feel free to ask for links if you want, i’m not gonna do it here but i can answer that in an ask), “Sugar Kush nuts are emerald green” and did i not fucking say the shit about wizard of oz and seattle and the emerald city. like, shit, this is a big coincidence. moving on with the description, it’s recommended for more experienced users because of a high THC content (THC is the feel good high stuff). we all know that  brendon is an extremely experienced user. i’m also going out on a limb that during pretty odd, the whole band was experiencing a lot of weed.

type of high was a little interesting. enough so that i’ll quote it. “Sugar Kush marijuana strain induces uplifting cerebral euphoria, energizes the mind, uplifts mood, relieves stress…” it also mentions that it relieves eye pressure which i found a little curious since tripping eyes… hmmMMM.

anyway. this next part is very, i don’t know, subjective? this isn’t like a 100% correct thing but it’s just another things that just fit SO WELL. users that typically like this strain are, a lot of times, male. they’re also between the ages of 20-40. not to say that people under or over can’t enjoy it but, guys, when they wrote this album they would have been right around 20. also, it mentions which zodiacs like this kush which is an odd thing to put in but, hey, cool i guess. the zodiacs were scorpio, but more so than that, virgo. unfortunately for me, brendon is not either of those. brendon is an aries. but do you know who issss a virgo? ryan fucking ross. also i believe jon walker but he’s irrelevant to this song. fun facts with admin. the similarities to this band just kinda make me laugh.

anyway, back to places. the ones that stood out to me as places of importance. portland, oregon, seattle, washington, tacoma, washington, and las vegas, nevada. las vegas is only here because that’s where the whole band is from.

for those of you who aren’t super familiar with OR/WA geography, portland, seattle, and tacoma are all super close. also gonna mention albany again. seattle and tacoma are neighboring cities. literally the worst traffic i’ve been in back to back. it sucks if you’re trying to get to B.C. canada. anyway, those both are about like 2-3 (depending on traffic and such) away from portland. in the scheme of things, that’s not really far apart. i’ve done that drive a lot. also, albany was said to be into sugar kush a lot. albany is about like an hour away from portland. so they’re all really close honestly. the farthest apart being albany to seattle and even then that’s like 5-ish hours? that’s 100% doable in a day.

just again pointing out that seattle found a way to be relevant to this song.

then we get to a section with ‘makes you feel:’ and ‘helps with:’

so in the makes you feel section it says it makes you feel attentive, and for real, did you mean brendon urie? it also mentions sociable but that’s kinda in and out on being relevant. then helps with. it says arthritis and muscle spasms and those don’t quite fit but what does fit into things i’ve mentioned, HEADACHES. guys, like, i wish i could make up these amazing coincidences. STILL NOT SAYING ANYTHING ABOUT BRENDON, but the fact that headaches is coming back up and not only that, it was listed under migraines. like i said before, migraines are the type that are unavoidable, you can’t just drink more water and cure them. those can be extremely debilitating. so the fact that this specific strain helps with that is just.. mind blowing.

this part is a users testimony to it. this isn’t the same for every single person but it was interesting. “very sugary” is the very first thing he says (with a typo, damn stoners). remember, this is all has been in relation to the one fucking line ‘sugarcane in the easy morning’.’ then he says that when you first smoke this, the first taste you get of it tastes like cane sugar. which, sugarcane, cane sugar, do you get my point? he also says that it has, after the sugar, a lil fruity taste which is just slight. what he does say is that the sugar taste is really in your face. don’t take this as a dig at brendon, but he can be seen as a little in your face at times. i don’t think it’s bad but it’s just curious to point out. also, he says that the sugar flavor lasts a few seconds even after the smoke is gone.

so, with all that in mind, sugarcane in the easy mornin’ is literally just wake and bake. sugarcane is the first thing they taste when they wake up aka sugar kush. easy aka relaxing. thank you. give me a judges gavel so i can slam it on a desk.

the next line is weathervanes, my one and lonely. going back to seattle (though this could be literally anywhere that gets stormy so..) if you don’t know, a weathervane is an instrument, really. you see it on tops of houses, USUALLY a rooster but can be anything. it tells you which direction the wind is coming from (north, east, south, west. now, during a storm, the rain and wind go the same way. we’ve already concluded that the rain and the downpour are depression coming for brendon so this line is just ryan making fun of him.

my one and lonely is a play on the romantic phrase, my one and only. it’s cute, okay? so ryan has known for probably a long time that brendon is in love with him but up until cape town, brendon never asks if it’s returned, he’s just been hoping privately. who wants to put money on the fact that brendon has referred to ryan as his one and only? it’s been said that he slept around in high school which leads me to believe that ryan could be brendon’s first love. we all know our first love seems like the only love we’ll ever have. so this is kind of ryan making fun of him. ryan is going back to the northern downpour with the weather vane which is pointing in the direction of where the depression is going (at brendon). then he says my one and lonely because brendon is going to be lonely. brendon’s one and only isn’t ryan, it’s depression when ryan finally admits he didn’t love brendon and goes. so this line is kind of just him laughing. fuck you. i have no idea how this can even be turned romantically like ???

so the chorus is repeated a lot with the pre chorus and this whole song is kind of beautiful. it sounds like a love song but it really really isn’t. it’s done with soft instruments and soft voices and it makes you feel happy. ryan brings up the hey moon again. refreshing your mind after all that weed, is “brendon” asking for ryan to fall in love.

so then, the chorus changes a little at the very end.

“Hey moon, please forget to fall down

Hey moon, don't you go down”

You are at the top of my lungs

Drawn to the ones who never yawn

this is the very last thing we hear. the first two lines don’t change. it’s still mocking. the last two though, man. ‘you are at the top of my lungs’ really reminds me of moaning somebody’s name. like, when you’re about to orgasm and the first thing out of your mouth is their name. then, it’s saying that that moan is drawn to the ones who never yawn (replace that with sleep). this is all just ryan being really fucking blunt in his secretive subtle way. did anyone else notice that those two lines are very sexual? like.. their relationship?

the first two lines are brendon, asking for ryan to fall in love. the last two lines are ryan’s response. he says no, i don’t love you. i am here for sex.

again, ryan wrote this as a warning, all of this was ryan saying that it won’t last, that he’s not in love. i’d just like to mention tripping eyes again and the fact that brendon didn’t understand the meaning of this song. he took it as ryan’s way of admitting love. he was blinded yet again by his own naivety.

Holes In a Tin Can

The door slammed hard against the cracked plaster of the wall so hard that a bit of the ceiling crumbled and landed in flakes on top of their heads.

Hancock pulled off his hat and gave it a good dusting, Nick doing to same with his own simultaneously. Cat did nothing of the sort.

She put her foot back onto the ground slowly, wincing at first and then resting her hands against her hips. “And THAT'S how you open a door! One swift kick and, KAPOW!”

Nick pinched the bridge of his nose. “It was probably unlocked if it came open that easy, detective.”

“Humor me here Valentine. You're the detective, not me.” Cat rolled her eyes.

The ghoul only laughed. “Maybe, but that WAS pretty cool. I'd've done the same thing.”

“See? SOMEONE APPRECIATES ME!”

Nick sighed loudly as they continued into the lobby of the cannery. Along the way to the settlement he'd spoken of earlier, they'd run into what they at first assumed to be an abandoned warehouse. A sign just off the road a few miles back clarified that it wasn't just ANY warehouse, but one with potentially lots and lots of cans of who knows what. Food preferably. It was worth the risk anyway; they were just about out of stuff to eat. Not that Nick needed to eat, but the other two did.

A desk with a computer sat in the middle of the room. Broken or worn down sofas and chairs spotted the sides, a few empty plant pots stood in the corners, and the wallpaper was virtually peeling off nearly everywhere they looked. One of the lights flickered menacingly, but all in all, the place remained rather quiet.

“I'm surprised I don't see garbage all over the place...aside from the usual amount that is.” The detective muttered, leaning down and picking up a dented, beat up aluminum can before tossing it aside.

“What makes you say that?” Cat was already near one of the sofas, stepping onto it and jumping up and down. “Hey these still have some spring in 'em!-”

“I SAY that because raiders is why. You've seen how they leave their trash everywhere. And you can usually hear them too.”

Hancock snorted a little as he circled around the desk to look at the computer. He tapped at one of the keys, but all that came up was a password login screen. “True. Color me a lil' surprised that we haven't seen any around a place like THIS. I mean, if I were a raider that read 'cannery', provided I COULD read (and I can,) then I woulda come sprinting to this place and holed myself up for a good long while. There's supposed to be a lotta good eatin' in joints like these right?”

“Well not if they're canning motor oil and other things. I don't think you can eat THOSE.” Nick answered flatly.

The ghoul shook his head. “Even if I were high, you couldn't get me to try that. Anyway...let's go have a look around. Might find somethin' useful in all this junk. Cat! C'mon! Get off that thing.”

Cat jumped off the sofa and back onto the floor, moving on ahead to the pair of doors that lay behind the desk, presumably leading into the inner parts of the factory. “Think they'll have that stew-flavored dog food?”

“You, kitty, are crazy. …But I do admit that stuff's pretty good...”

“Uh-” Nick raised his metal hand at them to stop them, but they were already halfway across the room. His finger joints refused to move. All the rain had slowly been taking its toll, rusting up little parts here and there. “Before you two go running off to look around for who knows what, make sure you check it out first-”

“Just incase of danger blah blah blah, I know Nick! Besides, I got this guy here to watch my back, what could POSSIBLY go wrong?” Cat ignored the synth's half-pleas and attempted to kick the door open again. It didn't work, and there was only a loud slam. “OW ow- DAMN IT-”

“Hancock-”

“I got it, keep yer trench coat on. Ain't nobody here. We'll be fine... Ok, my turn.” As soon as Cat moved aside, the mayor ran at the door and delivered a much stronger kick, successfully bursting through.

Nick's eyes remained half-lidded for the entire display. “You're gonna alert the whole damned Commonwealth if you keep at it with the amount of noise YOU'RE making.”

“Well then we better hurry on up inside! You gonna stay out here?” Cat turned and glanced over at him briefly while Hancock went ahead.

The detective paused for a moment, then looked down at his hand. “Yeah, I'll be there in a moment.”

Cat shrugged as she left. “Suit yourself!”

With another sigh, he went over to one of the chairs and sat in it heavily, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a little screwdriver.

“Always the rain with you...Pretty soon all the bolts are gonna be falling out.” Nick grumbled to himself as he retightened everything again. Even he hated to admit that his body was just getting old. Falling apart even. Once the stuff he called skin started peeling and breaking along the seams, he stopped caring about how he outwardly appeared (not that he ever really cared, but still.) If anything, it only became a bit of a nuisance because a good amount of the inner workings of his face and neck were exposed to potential enemies and the weather. Every now and then he could feel his jaw go stiff, or his neck, or some other part.

He flexed his fingers a few times, making sure each one of them worked. They were still a little reluctant, but they worked all right. That would have to do.

The screwdriver went back into his pocket in exchange for his lighter, and a cigarette from the other side of his coat. Once he had that, he got back onto his feet and went looking for the other two.

Inside the main building, past the doors, the place rather eerie in terms of the lighting. Half of the facility was covered by darkness and there'd be the occasional emergency wall light to break things up, giving little parts of the massive room these warm orange glows. Some of them even flashed on and off softly and slowly, almost like fireflies during a summer evening.

Nick paused briefly, only long enough to wonder why he'd thought of that specific image of all things. Probably just some memory that wasn't his. He shook his head lightly and kept walking.

“HEY HANCOCK, find anything yet?!” Cat called out as she pulled her head out of a box and tossed it onto the floor before moving to the next one.

“Uhh-” The mayor cringed a little as he opened pulled open another cardboard box, only to find a dead radroach in it. “Not really! Just a lotta crap and empty cans but otherwise no like...FOOD.”

The girl scowled and stood back to look at the scene, eyes narrowed. “There's gotta be something here... Doesn't look like anybody's been in here in ages...”

Hancock came over to her. “Well unless the place has been raided already. Doesn't look like it though, there are still boxes with tape on 'em and stuff. Why would anybody go wasting tape for that?” He slowly reached for his gun and made no sudden moves. The realization only hit him now.

Cat watched him, brows furrowing in concern now. Neither of them said a word for a long moment.

“Hear anything?” She asked quietly.

“...Nah... But I'm startin' to feel real uneasy. We should go get Nick n' get outta here... We'll just wait until we get to that settlement.”

“...Yeah, yeah ok, fine.”

The two abandoned their search and turned to head back the way they'd come. As soon as they stepped out from behind one of the big processing machines, Hancock's arms immediately came up and he nearly pulled the trigger.

Nick did the same with his pistol. “Son of a-”

“DAMN IT NICK! You scared the shit outta me! I coulda taken your metallic head off!”

“That makes two of us.” They lowered their weapons. “I'm ALMOST comforted to know that you don't have trigger happy reflexes.”

Hancock frowned. “Yeah, lucky you in that case. We can't find anything in here. The boxes are all-”

“They're all like taped up and filled with junk like someone did it on purpose! Why would anybody do that?”

Nick pursed his lips a bit, finding the situation to be more than suspicious. “What? I don't know. But if that's the case, I don't want to stay to find out. Let's get the hell out of here already. Rain or not, it's probably not a good idea to stick around a place like this.”

They hadn't gone two steps when a small, nearly undetectable sound hit Nick's audio sensors. Even Hancock would have been hard pressed to hear that tiny metal clink against one of the catwalks hanging above them.

In one swoop, the synth spit out his cigarette, swung his arm out and wrapped it around the mayor and their charge and pulled them in between one of the big machines. “Don't move.”

None of them spoke as they strained to listen for any kind of noise.

At first there was nothing, and then they started to hear it. Something else walking around somewhere in the factory. Something that wasn't them.

Cat stayed squashed in between them while the mayor and the detective gave each other a knowing look. They had to somehow get out of the building without being spotted, or heard. And it couldn't be through the front door in all likelihood.

They started to inch in tandem carefully towards one of the far walls. There had to be a back door somewhere. There always were other exits in places like these for shipments to go out, for emergencies, or for just plain old convenience.

As they shuffled along at a snail's pace, Nick kept his eyes on the catwalks above them. He could have sworn he saw something up there. A light moving in the black void.

“Hello?” As soon as that computerized voice rang out abruptly into the factory, they all stopped cold.

Other synths. From the Institute no doubt. There had to be more than one here, they never came alone.

Hancock swallowed the lump in his throat, resisting the urge to just jump out and start shooting. He wasn't going to be scared off by these boogeymen. Not by a long shot. But he also knew he didn't have just himself to think about either. He looked over his shoulder a few times, trying to find any way out before spotting an exit sign with an arrow pointing down another hallway.

He elbowed Nick, then turned his attention to what he'd seen. The detective nodded and began herding them in that direction.

The moment they reached the halfway mark, a bright blue blast from a laser flew past them and hit the wall, melting a small crater into it. Another synth stuck its head out from in between one of the huge canning machines and stared right at them with glowing white eyes. “Stop.” It commanded.

“Shit- MOVE!” Nick gave them all a good shove before the idea of running even hit their heads.

“Are you KIDDING? You're just gonna LET 'EM GO WITHOUT A FIGHT?” Hancock spun around as soon as they reached the exit sign and ran into the new hallway, ready to take aim at the synth running at them. He could see a two others jump down to the ground floor in the back somewhere.

“NOT today.” Nick grabbed the back of his ragged coat and forcefully yanked him back.

At the end of the hallway Cat slid to a stop and frantically turned her head back and forth in both directions. The hall split off into other passages, without another exit in sight. “Which one?!”

They all hesitated for a second or two before the detective once again pulled them down one of the corridors as soon as the other synths started to appear behind them. Even he didn't know where they were going. He just hoped that there was another door somewhere inside.

Several more laser beams hit the walls beside them as they ran. Little offices and closets dotted the sides, until they spotted another exit sign pointing them out of the labyrinth of a factory.

Luckily for them, the emergency fire escape door was just a few feet away from the indicating sign.

“That thing looks like it hasn't been used in ages- I don't think I can kick THAT-” Hancock blurted out. Another laser nearly brushed past his back and he spun around, growling. “Nick, get it open, I'll cover us.” He raised his rifle and fired a few shots. “YOU WANT SOME OF THIS? COME AND GET IT!”

One of the pursuing synths received a direct hit in the chest before falling onto the ground, little more than a malfunctioning mess. Its companions pressed on, unfazed.

Cat moved closer to Nick as he tried to get the door open. “They're COMING- HURRY UP!”

“I can't-” The lock was jammed real good. There'd be no sweet talking this one. Nick gave up and took a couple steps back, running at the door before giving it a hard kick himself. The thing flew open and almost tore off the hinges. “HANCOCK, FORGET ABOUT THEM! LET'S GO!”

“JUST ONE MORE SHOT-” The mayor fired again and hit the second synth, leaving only one more remaining before one of the lasers grazed his upper arm. He gave a loud yelp before turning and following after the others.

On the outside it was still raining, just like it had been when they had arrived, but nobody cared about that now. If they had to run across the soggy and muddy hills of the Commonwealth to get away from that thing chasing them, then so be it.

“Go on- go-” Nick stopped and let them run ahead of him before following. He knew there'd be no place to take cover and hide should that thing start shooting at them again. Unfortunately for them, it did.

Cat screeched as one of the beams nearly hit her foot. “NICK-”

This had to end.

The detective slid to a stop and whirled around, reaching for his pistol with his metal-claw. All he had to do was fire one shot into that thing's head and they'd be rid of it.

Everything happened in a flash and almost in slow motion at the same time. His arm came up, his finger curled around the trigger and he could see the synth barreling up the hill they had just climbed, raising its own weapon to him.

But his fingers wouldn't move. They locked up again and stood still.

“N-No-”

Before he could do anything about it, the opposing synth fired a blast right into his chest, the energy sailing right on through him and out the other side.

“NO-” Cat stopped running and Hancock spun around, loading one more bullet and aiming at the enemy synth's pristine white head. He fired, and took it off with one clean shot.

As it fell to the ground, Nick followed suit, landing heavily onto his knees, his yellow eyes flickering.

“NICK- HEY-”

“NICK-”

It was a bizarre sensation, feeling everything go dark at a rapid pace. His visual sensors shut off first, and all the control he had in his limbs seemed to just vanish. He hit the floor and only then did he realize this was bad. Real bad.

“N-...no-” He repeated. Why did his fingers have to lock up right then and there? Why didn't he tighten those stupid bolts more? Or oil the damned things?? How the hell was he going to protect anybody now?

He never knew such questions could run through his head. Would the real Nick have done the same? Maybe.

The last sensory function to shut down was his hearing. He had caught little pieces of their voices before everything went silent all together, but his brain hadn't really been able to decipher it. Before everything ceased to even exist he felt his lips move but he didn't hear anything he said.

“Not...not like... Not like this...”