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irisintheafterglow · 1 month
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um blah blah blah something about knight!katsuki tearing through panicked crowds to find you slumped behind a knocked-over table, paling when he sees the growing red patch under the hand on your side.
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"shit," is all he manages to force out, and it's all he can say for the next thirty seconds while he tries to figure out how to get you out of here. "no, no, no. you're not fine, dumbass," he snaps when you insist that you're fine. he registers a figure sprinting towards him with an axe and throws a dagger from his belt without even thinking, the assailant falling onto the dirt. "this is all your fault," he mutters as he pulls you from under the table and into a nearby alley.
"i can't believe you're blaming me for my own assassination attempt," you exhale shakily, your breathing too uneven for his liking. "all i wanted was to pick some flowers."
"we could have had the flowers brought to the palace," he argues, raking a nervous hand through his hair. "but you wanted to see them straight from the farmer's market."
"there's not much we can do now that i am bleeding out," you groan, fighting down the bile in your throat when you see how red your hand has become. katsuki's hand gently but firmly grips your wrist, forcing it out of your field of vision.
"don't look at it. just look at me," he commands, scarlet eyes revealing his panic. for the first time in your history together, katsuki looked scared. "just keep looking at me, okay? i'm gonna move you to a safehouse a few blocks away."
"no, please," you plead with him, grabbing his wrist before he can loop his arms under your legs. "it hurts when i move."
"the other option is for you to die, princess, and i'm not letting that happen," he swears. "i shouldn't have ever let this happen to you in the first place."
"it's not your fault," you whisper, your thumb smearing red across his cheekbone.
"isn't it, though?" the expression of pure grief on your knight's face disappears in an instant and, before you can protest, katsuki lifts you from the ground like you weighed nothing at all. you muffle a broken cry into your hand and squeeze your eyes tight against his chest, shaking from the white-hot arc of pain cutting your side. "just stay with me, princess. you're gonna be okay."
"it hurts, kats," you sob quietly and a part of him dies. "it hurts so much."
"i know it does, baby. just stay with me and the pain will go away soon."
katsuki isn't there when you wake up in the palace infirmary, but the news of the pub bloodbath where several members of the criminal underworld were being investigated reached you eventually. your knight was supposed to be leading the investigation, but dragon keeper kirishima revealed that, after the attack in the market, he had taken matters into his own hands.
he had a single thought as he inserted his dripping sword back into its sheath. long live the princess as long as he lived.
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Our Little Love part seven - OT7 Mafia/Yandere au
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What’s that saying? One step forward two steps back? 👀 6K words containing: manipulation, toxic yandere men, non-consented acts of affection, lies, possessive behaviour, jealousy, allusion to crime and kidnapping.
“Little love,” Jin calls for you absentmindedly, frowning when you don’t look up from your book to answer him. It’s one you had read a million times before, maybe you didn’t hear him.
“Little love?” He tries again, looking confused as you let out a disgruntled sigh of annoyance.
He can see your jaw clench, something had pissed you off. Your foot became restless as you sat in the arm chair, it was only when Jimin cleared his throat obviously he remembered the terms and conditions you had enforced.
This time he lets out a big sigh, one of tested patience. He mumbles an apology before turning away, a bitter feeling creeping up his chest. Fuck, he resented the fact he couldn’t call you that anymore, it was like asking him not to breathe. Fuck fuck fuck, they needed to earn your forgiveness soon or this might actually kill them. Not that they ever underestimated you, but you really did know which weapons to pull to hurt them the most, and fuck did he have to admit they deserved it. Didn’t mean he had to like any of it.
Jimin follows him out, a quick glance back at you to see if you were paying any concern but of course not. Since the day you announced the break you’d been keeping your distance, Jimin had complained about it childishly with tantrum tears in his eyes but you had patiently explained you needed the space to clear your head. 
Jimin scoffs at the memory, feeling sour about it still. The pout he wears gives away his thoughts when they both find Yoongi in the kitchen.
“Little love giving you a hard time?” he says almost amused. 
It’s Jin’s turn to scoff dramatically, ears burning so red, Yoongi swears there’s steam. 
“We can’t call her that anymore,” he complains, sulking. 
Yoongi smiles a little, not because he truly found his hyung’s pain entertaining, but because he understood the pain. 
“It’s a difficult situation,” Yoongi agrees, “but the alternative would have been so much worse.”
Jimin and Jin stare silently at him, their gazes aggressive as if they wanted to hit the male but they didn’t because he was right. The worst alternative wasn’t expecting you to leave, they all knew they would never let that happen, but if you had become a ghost of yourself, if they had broken you so badly there was nothing left to rebuild, then what would be left of you? 
“When did you become so considerate?” Jimin scoffs, rolling his eyes. He didn’t like any of it, he didn’t care if you were right and they were wrong, you had taken away their most prized and valuable possession, you. He couldn’t help the internal tantrums as if someone had taken away his favourite toy. Call him childish, call him whatever the hell you wanted, he hated this situation, and he couldn’t hide it. 
They apologised, and apologised, and apologised, and you still gave them the cruellest punishment you could think of. 
“You’re still thinking with anger,” Yoongi acknowledges, knowing when Jimin cooled down from this he would probably be the one with the most regret and remorse, what he didn’t know is Jimin was clinging to his resentment with all his might, because once that gave way he would have so much to answer for. 
Men would pay money to see Jung Hoseok hesitate, but that was exactly what he was doing now. Another book in your hand (you were reading a bit too much lately, he didn’t like it, it was as if you knew you couldn’t leave physically so you were doing so mentally), and he was stalling himself with interrupting you. 
Your rejection cut holes into him, and that’s what he was afraid of when approaching you today. When he was younger he used to be afraid of everything, but after indulging in the horrors of survival and the syndicate, nothing terrified him any more, or so he thought before his heart belonged to you. 
“Litt-” he catches himself before he says it too loud, clearing his throat quietly hoping you didn’t hear him. “Y/n?”
He sounds more confident, his more serious persona going up as if that would protect him here. He knew he needed it, any sane person after experiencing his pleasure and pain games would run at the sight of him, and a part of him was getting ready to catch you if you did.
You look at him and it has him crumbling. Something in his chest physically hurts him so bad he thinks he needs to go see a specialist, one glance from you and he’s ready to beg on his knees again for your forgiveness. The distance between you, although you were here in front of him, killed him. It felt eerily similar to what it did when you left, and it confused his brain and body so much. 
He had to remind himself every day, you were still here, you still loved them, this was just temporary. 
“I-I wasjus- I was just heading to the b-basment,” forget money, men would lay down their lives to see Jung Hoseok stutter and stumble over his words. 
You frown in question when he doesn’t continue, but stares at you expectantly, until he realises he hadn’t explained what he wanted.
“For a workout!” He rectifies himself quickly before taking a breath to calm himself, “I wondered if you wanted to join me?”
He mentally pats himself on the back quickly for sounding more put together, but then his nerves start to shake again when you don’t respond immediately. You contemplate it, for too long in his eyes, stretching out the pause until you have the man sweating. Who needs a work out, just piss your girlfriend off and try to spend time with her while she's still mad. 
“Yeah, okay,” you nod, finally putting down your book (he should get Jimin to burn them all). “I’ll go get changed.”
The relief and joy that floods Hobi almost makes him pass out, a genuine smile he hasn’t felt on his own face for days bursts through. This was a step in the right direction, you didn’t hate him or you would’ve shut him down. With the amount of hope in his system, he was getting giddy.
You wanted some time alone this evening, without them lingering around you, with poor attempts of covering their intentions with busying themselves. As if you couldn’t see Jimin’s imploring stare as he walked past you from the corner of your eyes. Or the way Jin would walk towards you, hesitate and then walk away. 
You didn’t say they couldn’t talk to you, you were just on a break. Part of you knows you should seek them out and start civil conversation but that part also knew once you opened the door they would come barging through. An inch would turn into a mile and you would be back where you started. 
So now you were busying yourself with the world’s worst chore, just to escape and breathe for a second, laundry. You were sorting through the load at a snail’s pace, knowing when you were done you’d have to endure them again. You’re so embedded in your own thoughts you don’t feel another presence join you.  
Arms wrap around you, making you still. His figure almost engulfs you from behind, his nose already finding purchase on your neck as he buries himself against you. You try not to sigh, you were sick of hearing the sound yourself but it was always  one of patience.
You understood how hard it was for them to accept your decision for a ‘break’, but all you wanted was some respect for it. And this broke your no touching rule.
“Tae let go,” you say without an ounce of emotion, continuing sorting out the laundry in front of you.
His only reaction to your words is the opposite of course, holding you tighter against him making your heart skip too many beats to count. Your skin sizzled with something akin to longing, a fire he only seemed to ignite when his breath hit your neck.
You don’t give in. You throw the item of clothing in your hand down, both hands on the edge of the basket as you still, standing statue as he tries his hardest to work through your defences. You don’t respond when he nuzzles his nose against where he’s buried, or to the rumble of his chest when he breathes you in deeply. His eyes are closed, you know they are, he’s relishing the moment all he can before you take it away.
He doesn’t feel you respond the way he wants you to, he wants you to melt against him and the urge is so strong but somehow you resist. He whines, the sound so soft near your ears you almost miss it. He tries holding you tighter still, his thumb stroking soft circles on your skin, trying to tempt you to break your resolve. Gentle, almost whisper like kisses are placed on your shoulder as he finally breaks away.
“Are you done?” You say almost coldly as he steps back, picking back up another item of clothing.
You hear him sniff but you don’t let it move you.
“Heaven, please,” he begs, a fist in your top clutching onto you.
That’s when you turn to face him. If he expects to see any softness in your gaze he’s sorely mistaken, it’s not a glare you’re giving him but it’s close enough that it burns. You don’t even flinch when you see tears in his eyes.
“I asked you not to touch me,” you state quietly but your words are firm. “Or that if you did, you asked first.”
He looks down, partly in shame, partly in grief. You can’t stand to see the sight, it makes your heart ache, so you walk away.
“Y/n?” Jungkook asks for your attention, biting his lips in worry. “Can I ask you about the book you’re reading?”
The others in the room feel an overwhelming sense of envy when you smile at the maknae. Jimin’s jaw goes slack as you scoot over to let Jungkook sit beside you. Envy was a dangerous thing, how he wanted to pluck the youngest of them out of the seat and take his place, but he hadn’t calmed his emotions down enough yet to approach you properly, and he knew if he did he’d ruin whatever rebuilding the others had done. No, he had to be patient with himself and withdraw, even if that meant physically. He was playing cards with Yoongi and Seokjin, but he places his cards down and leaves. 
Jin’s pout overtakes his face when he turns away from the sight of Jungkook grinning while you talk animatedly, putting down a card without thinking and letting Yoongi take the win this round. Yoongi didn’t even notice, his gaze goes soft at the way you laugh at a teasing comment Jungkook made, a sound he hasn’t heard in what felt like forever. The sound even makes the corners of Jin’s pout pull up. 
The youngest of the group honestly thought he was in paradise, he didn’t even care about the book he just wanted to hear you talk without reservation. His focus was on the way your eyes lit up, the genuine smile on your face, how does he try to make this moment last forever? He pays attention to every word you utter, asking the right question to keep you going, even making a joke here and there and feeling so pleased with himself when you laugh. 
How did the relationship regress back so far that he felt like this was the start of it, like he was still pursuing you to give him a chance, like he had to work up the courage to ask you out all over again. The answer of course was in their mistakes, the thought dampens his mood but he pushes it away. He didn’t know when he would get another moment like this, he had to soak it all in and cherish it before it was over. 
Your defences go up when you spot Jimin bringing Taehyung to you, the shorter male holding his hand guiding your bear like boyfriend in front of you. You look at them both expectantly, wondering what the theatrics were for. Taehyung sniffles, his face hanging low, his red hoodie pulled down as far as he can get it to hide himself. 
“Taehyung has something he wants to say Heaven- I mean angel- I mean Y/n,” he corrects himself repeatedly with a shake of his head, cheeks burning in slight embarrassment at the blunder, but he wouldn’t apologise for it even it that made him a hypocrite for what he was making Taehyung do. 
He pushes his friend gently, encouraging him to speak.
“Tae?” you say gently, remembering how harshly you spoke to him the other day. 
Apparently that was all it took for the man to break down into tears in front of you, falling to his knees as he bawled. Your jaw drops in shock at the action, but you’re more surprised at the fact he holds himself back from launching into you for comfort. 
You can see how hard it is to do so, he’s hugging himself, but his nails dig into the fabric of his clothes. He still doesn’t look at you, his gaze on the floor. You give him a second to compose himself, the sobs turning into little hiccups as he wipes his face with his sleeve. 
When he looks at you it's your turn to grip the armrests of the chair with all your might, those glassy eyes beg you for love and it takes everything not to smother him in your embrace. But that would undo all the work you’ve been doing, you had to talk it out first and then maybe if this was resolved you could reward him with physical affection, just a little. 
“I-I’m sorry,” he says through a hoarse voice, the sound only breaking your resolve further. “About the other day, I s-should’ve asked first.”
He tries to take a deep breath in but it’s shaky, for some reason what he wants to say next breaks him out into more tears. He covers his face as he cries, Jimin rubbing his back providing him with the comfort you couldn’t give just yet. 
“Doyouhateme?”
The muffled question breaks your heart, Jimin can see it on your face and it has him fighting down a smirk. He may have played a hand at manipulating the situation, convincing Taehyung this was the best way to get back into your good books.
“Tae no,” you breathe, eyes watering but you blink back the tears. You didn’t want to show them any weakness anymore. “I don’t hate you.”
You sigh, eyes to the ceiling, as if begging for control over yourself as you try really hard to not give in to the feeling of wanting to crawl into his lap and hold him. 
“I just really needed some space that day,” you explain, “and you caught me at a bad time.”
That wipes away Jimin’s elation, all this talk about space and distance, it already felt like you were living on Mars. How much space did you want? In his opinion there had been too much space, that was the problem, or were you forgetting the long agonising months of your absence? 
Taehyung nods, thankfully retaining your attention away from Jimin who couldn’t hide his thoughts from his face. 
You can’t sleep, tossing and turning from your side to your back and then to your side again. Were you fighting a losing battle? Were you being unfair in asking them to change? You remember cases of forgotten wives refusing to leave their no good husbands, the amount of inane times you heard the cries of ‘I can get him to change’... had you become one of those women? Then of course came the others, the women who knew they could not work miracles on their partners and gave up. Some left, some stayed, and you remember watching them all in the years of your career, arrogantly thinking it would never be you, no man would ever trap you like this. There was a joke in there somewhere, one man certainly didn’t, but seven did. 
The knock on the door thankfully interrupts your endless circle of pity, a meek Jungkook peeking around as he opens the door. Something about the scene felt familiar but the shoe was on the other foot. He was waiting for permission to come in, you don’t know why the sight made you smile, made you warm. 
If anyone was proof that they were trying for you it was Jungkook, Yoongi had kept his distance out of respect for your rules, you know he only did so because he couldn’t help himself if he got too close. Jimin was similar although, you could see he was keeping his distance mentally, angry with you and your conditions. It would pass, you were sure, or at least you hoped. 
Jungkook was the only one that accepted everything without complaint, and you knew it wasn’t easy. You were so grateful to him for it, for respecting your boundaries sincerely, for giving you hope that this relationship could be salvaged. 
He almost trips over himself when you pull the covers back wordlessly, inviting him in, the stumble of his legs as he races towards you makes you giggle. He climbs in without hesitation, about to reach out for you but he stops himself, eyes looking up at you, wanting to ask you out loud but too afraid to. 
“It’s okay,” you reassure him quietly, as if talking loudly would break the peace you felt with him there, that you’d second guess yourself.
Arms you’ve longed for wrap around your waist, pulling you towards him. You hold him back gently, not letting yourself get lost in him the way you wanted. In the darkness, your gazes meet, talking loudly in a way filled the silence. 
“I’ve missed you,” he breathes out hard, unable to hold it in any longer. 
“I’ve missed you too,” you admit.
He bites his lips to refrain from saying anything else, to break the illusion that everything was okay.
“I used to think I understood your darkness,” you murmur, stroking his hair out of his face.
He pulls you closer, burying his head against your chest, the youngest didn’t like how that sentence was going and part of him didn’t want to hear the rest.
“But I don’t think I ever did,” you confess in a whisper, starting to ramble. “I don’t get it Kookie, why me? This obsession, I thought I felt it the same as you, I thought you guys understood me too.”
You let out a shaky breath, trying to keep up with your thoughts when you felt the hands of sleep trying to catch you.
“Maybe I was just trying to excuse my own darkness,” you sigh, almost in defeat. “Or maybe I just fed yours too much.”
“You gave us your love,” he mumbles against your skin, eyes closed as he breathes in your scent. “Your acceptance, you didn’t feed our darkness baby, you just didn’t see the extent of it.”
The silence is suffocating. Yoongi normally appreciates it but in this situation it was unsettling. They’re all in the living room, some pretending to do their own thing, but no one was paying any attention to anything other than you. Yoongi and Namjoon did so blatantly, Yoongi sitting on the couch away from you but his stare is nowhere else. This didn’t break the rules, you didn’t tell him he couldn’t soak you in with his eyes whenever he wanted. 
The others were also very obvious with their glances towards you, Jin was dusting the same spot of the living room over and over. Hoseok flipping through the tv channels with Jungkook sitting beside him, the maknae biting his lips in worry with every peek he took, a habit he hadn’t had since he was a teenager. Taehyung and Jimin uncharacteristically played chess but all the pieces were in the wrong places, arbitrarily moving them just to keep appearances so you didn’t call them out. 
And Namjoon… the man was staring daggers into your form. Elbow on his thigh, leaning forward, his chin on his thumb, his finger on his face tapping away on his cheekbone impatiently. He was supposed to be going over the papers in his lap, but they were being scrunched in his other hand. Yoongi thought he looked like a bomb about to explode, and he wasn’t wrong.
“That’s it!” Namjoon almost growls as he slams his file down, standing from his seat while everyone stares in shock at his outburst.
He walks towards you, and you meet his glare but refuse to move from the comfort and safety of the tub chair, you don’t even close your book.
“This ‘break’ is over,” he snarls, gestating with his hands trying to find a conduit for his anger. “Do you understand, little love?”
You look up at him with eyes simmering a fire he only ignited, meeting his glare head on.
“I decide when this break is over,” you say calmly, refusing to fight him at his level.
“No.”
“No?” Your brows scrunch in disbelief and anger, there goes your plan to remain calm. “What do you mean ‘no’?”
You throw your book back into the seat as you rise to meet him eye to eye, although he’s still looking down at you.
“I mean…” he breathes gruffly, grazing his hand with yours at your side. “No.”
“You can’t b-“
Your voice is smothered by his lips, his soft touch turning into an iron grip as he pulls you closer, devouring you like a man starved and in his eyes that’s exactly what he was. You push him away, but he doesn’t allow for any space between you.
Even when you’re banging your fist against his chest, unable to breathe, he doesn’t budge. You’re at his mercy, only when he decides he’s had enough (for now), does he pull away.
You look dishevelled almost, breathing hard, your eyes glistening with tears. The sight shouldn’t arouse him but it does.
You have the audacity to childishly wipe his kiss away with the back of your hand, a tough swipe that does nothing to erase the force he handled you with. He chuckles, the sound makes your ears burn, feeling the warmth of shame colour them in.
The others stare with the jaws wide open, fear settling in that this was taking too many steps in the wrong direction. It takes everything not to call you back when you storm away, it takes everything not to follow. 
No one says a word, but they all glare accusingly at their leader except Taehyung, who only looks down in shame. 
“Where do you think you’re going?” Yoongi asks gruffly, sleep still in his voice.
“Out.” You respond bluntly, avoiding his gaze.
“I asked where,” he pushes when you pull Taehyung’s hoodie over your head. You were drowning in the fabric, and he pretended the sight didn’t make him ache for you. The same way you were trying so hard not to let his sleepy state bring down your defences, no matter how cute he looked in the shorts and grey top.
“What does it look like Yoongi,” your head was spinning with too many thoughts and you needed to clear it. “For a run.”
“I’ll come with you,” he says it like an offer but it’s not, you know it’s not. 
“No,” you refuse simply, finally meeting his stare. “Send one of your men to keep an eye on me, it's what you did before anyway.”
He’s quiet, observing you for a moment. You hated it when he did that, it was like he could see inside of you and yet, despite that, you felt like he couldn’t understand anything he saw. You break eye contact first, putting on your trainers while he continues to stare. Why couldn’t you read him the same, how could he still get under your skin with his silence even after all this time?
“I’ll send Jungkook,” he says as you open the door. “He’ll keep his distance.”
He doesn’t take the slam as you leave personally, he knows you just need to vent your frustrations, but because you were so isolated- sorry, because they isolated you, you had no one to vent to, no one who was objective to talk to. Physically stretching your mind would maybe do you some good. 
“Did you seriously let her go out unsupervised?” Namjoon seethes as he approaches Yoongi, quick to dial one of their men regardless of what nefarious time of the morning it was. The first call goes to voicemail.
Yoongi sighs, he was on his way back to bed, guess not.
“She deserves our trust,” he replies. “And I was about to send Jungkook.”
“It’s not about trust,” Namjoon bites back, another call unanswered, “it’s about safety, or are you forgetting our enemies hunt our weaknesses.”
“Our enemies know if they touch her they’ve signed their own death certificate, no one would dare cross us now, not with the amount of blood we’ve shed,” Yoongi groans in aggravation. “Not to mention you’ve bought out the police Namjoon.”
“But not every policeman, or Captain, or are you forgetting what we did to him?”
“You gave him a warning, he’ll behave,” Yoongi states, ready to leave the conversation but he can’t help himself with what he says next. After Namjoon’s actions last night, he was feeling a little vengeful, even if he didn’t completely mean his words. “We should’ve left him unharmed, we knew she didn’t want us to hurt him.”
The shock in Namjoon’s eyes flashes for a second before they compose themselves to a stare. He puts his phone back in his pocket, maybe Jungkook was the best one to go, you didn’t seem to punish him as harshly as the others.
The silence between the men turns the air cold, their gazes stoic but speaking volumes. Namjoon wouldn’t stand for mutiny or disloyalty, he especially didn’t stand for anyone questioning his decisions.
“He hurt her,” he explains himself patiently, “he wants to take her away from us.”
Yoongi scoffs, a humourless grin on his face as he stares back in ridicule at their leader.
“We hurt her,” he states, eyes blank of emotion, “where’s our bullet to the knees.”
If you were being honest with yourself, you hated running, you hated the way each breath burned as it filled your lungs, how each limb could feel like lead, but the pain was better than the thoughts you were trying to clear. 
You remember at the police academy, Suho and Kai used to run circles around you, but somewhere along the way your competitiveness got the better of you, and you trained harder than them both. It used to annoy you to hell that they were physically much stronger than you, but those days were some of the best. The three of you were so close, each other’s confidants when things went sour, the two you’d hang out with when a case went wrong. Now who did you have to confide in?
Maybe it’s your conscious or unconscious thoughts making your legs move in a particular direction, but you don’t realise where you’re headed until you see the sign above the door. The breakfast place… where everything went to shit a third time.
You barely glance inside as you run past but the sight of someone familiar makes you double take. Think of the devil and he appears?
His eyes catch yours when you stop in your tracks, he’s sitting at a table alone and the sight of him brings back that day like a breath after being underwater for so long. An apology is at the tip of your tongue, your eyes start to water, you know you have to keep running, if any of them finds you here with him, he’d be dead. You’re about to turn away when he waves at you, a simple smile that didn’t meet his eyes sent your way as he watches the realisation hit you.
His hand was covered in thick bandages, and your stare doesn’t leave them. There’s no thought in your mind as your legs move you into the building, ignoring the waiter's greeting as you walk towards your old Captain with dread. 
He shifts in his seat, letting you see the bandages on his leg, around his knee, the crutches resting on the seat next to him. Your eyes are wide with shock before your gaze turns into one of mournful rage. Tears start forming in your eyes as you shake.
The sense of betrayal that overwhelms you has you reaching a hand for the table, gripping the edge tight to steady yourself. 
They lied. 
They looked you in the eyes and lied. All of them, including Jungkook. You don’t let yourself sob, not when a fire burns any attachment you felt towards them to dust. 
You move your gaze from his injuries to his face, his stare never having left you. 
“Arrest them,” your voice is hoarse but without a morsel of regret, anger paving the way forward now, filling the loss you felt deep inside of you. 
They must’ve thought you were fucking stupid, they must’ve laughed behind your back, humoring you with their acts of trying to change. Fuck, you were a fool, they played you again and again and you just took it every fucking time. There was never going to be any change, and you refused to be their prisoner any longer.
“I’ll be your witness,” you say it with conviction, although a part of you grieves. “I’ll give you all the evidence you need, just send them away.”
Suho doesn’t say a word, and that makes it all so much worse. You can feel something creeping around you, shadows of them that have latched onto you, crawling all over your skin. You wanted rid of this dark energy, you wanted out. 
You don’t break his stare, not for a second, you can tell he’s deep in thought, contemplating your resolve, and if he saw a hint of uncertainty in you he would do no such thing. Why would he risk it? They hurt him, they could hurt him again. 
He reaches for his phone, and you take a premature breath of relief.
“Make the call,” he commands, handing the device to you. 
When Yoongi dragged Jungkook out of bed this morning, the maknae had begrudgingly crawled out of the house. His body ran on autopilot when he left to find you, eyes half open, yawning in the morning air. His hoodie pushes his hair to fall in his face but he’s too tired to drag the fabric back.
It wouldn’t take long to find you, he could run circles around you if he wanted but the thought of maybe spending some time with you alone made his legs pick up the pace, a goofy grin on his face as he thought about it.
Yes you were probably mad about Namjoon’s actions yesterday, not that Jungkook blamed him all that much, it was hard to stay away from you, but he was starting to understand your perspective a little more. Especially after the last time you pulled away, and he couldn’t let that happen again, he wouldn’t survive it another time. He wouldn’t blame you if you gave him the cold shoulder, he just hopes you don’t punish him because of Namjoon, deflecting your anger wherever it did damage.
He’d calm you down, he’s sure of it. He’d tell you that what their big bad boss did was wrong and he was on your side, he’d tell you that he loved you and respected you, and it didn’t matter how long you took to forgive them he was sure the relationship would heal.
He’s so lost in thought he doesn’t realise how far he’s travelled, it’s only when there’s still no sight of you his grin begins to fade. He should’ve caught up to you by now, this was the route you normally take, and you knew better than to go another way.
What if… no. You wouldn’t dare leave again, you wouldn’t. Jungkook breaks into a sprint, running every route he can think of, not stopping for a moment even when his lungs and legs burn. He’s looking round like a mad man, but he can’t find you. What if something happened? What if someone got to you or hurt you? Memories flash in his mind to long, long ago when that was almost the case. What if?
Shit. A hand to his pocket tells him he’s left his phone, he couldn’t contact the others to join him. His best decision was to get back to the house asap. Jin would still have the tracker on your phone, they would find you, it was all going to be fine.
The fear that seized his heart was not fooled by such idealistic thoughts, his eyes had seen the true brutality of the world, sometimes caused by his own hands, and now his mind played a myriad of images of his little love in all the situations of pain he caused others. He always wondered if karma would catch him one day, he never thought it would take you.
He slams the door open so hard it struggles to stay on the hinges.
“I CAN’T FIND HER!” He yells into the open space of the home with all the air in his lungs.
It doesn’t take long for the hoard to assemble.
“What do you mean you can’t find her?” Jin yells back, reaching for his phone to track you without prompt.
Jungkook doesn’t miss the way Namjoon glares at Yoongi, the shorter man ignoring him.
“She’s probably taken another route,” he says calmly. 
“You better hope that’s all,” Namjoon says through gritted teeth. 
“What if someone’s got her?” Jimin panics.
“No,” Hoseok shuts that idea down, “everyone knows there is nowhere in Seoul to hide from us.”
“There’s always one idiot that’s willing to try, or have you forgotten the last time someone tried to take her?” Taehyung says heatedly.
“And we know how that ended,” Hoseok growls back.
The bickering among themselves grows in volume, so loud that they almost miss what Jin says. 
“What?” It’s Yoongi that dares to ask him to repeat himself, the drumming in his ears drowning the words. He must’ve misheard…
“She’s at the police station,” there’s no mistaking it this time. Jin looks solemnly at Namjoon while all their heads spiral.
“She’s not gone there of her own will,” Yoongi shakes his head in denial, “they’ve arrested her or something.”
Namjoon says eerily quiet, his breathing hard, his jaw clenched. 
“Namjoon we own the police,” Hoseok pushes, “make a fucking call see why she’s there.”
“Fuck making a call! I’m going over there,” Jungkook announces, turning back to the front door, but the sight of a police van pulling up at their mansion makes him stop in his tracks. 
“Are they dropping her home,” Jimin asks stupidly, unable to comprehend why else they would be there. 
The older four men look at eachother knowingly. 
“Should we run?” Jin asks, making Taehyung and Jimin whip their heads to stare at him incredulously. 
“Why would we run?” Namjoon breaks his silence, “they’ll take us right to her.”
As if on queue a smoke grenade rolls into the room, blasting off within seconds, covering the air. Namjoon almost laughs, they sent the fucking swat team, how ridiculous when they could’ve settled this like gentlemen.
Bodies swarm in, yelling commands and they all fall to their knees as instructed. On any other day, if you were home, these men wouldn’t make it through the door, but Namjoon was right, they were a one way ticket to finding you.
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steddiehyperfixation · 5 months
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don't you forget about me (part six)
(part one)(part two)(part three)(part four)(part five)
Steve allows himself a brief mental breakdown in the shower when he gets home. He lets the water mix with his tears as he curls his arms around himself and wishes with everything he is that they were Eddie’s. There’s nothing he wouldn’t give right now just to be held by him again, just to feel Eddie’s arms around him one more time. All it took was a tiny kiss on the back of his hand for Steve’s skin to remember just how much it missed that feeling. Now Steve’s entire body craves Eddie’s touch, and he shakes in its absence like an addict in withdrawal. 
Then he puts himself back together, gets dressed and styles his hair and heads off to work. 
They’d defeated Vecna before he could split the world into pieces or whatever his diabolical plan had been. So while Steve’s whole world may have been torn apart, while Steve’s whole world lays bruised and bandaged and amnesic in a hospital bed, the rest of the world carries on none the wiser. The rest of the world still rents VHS tapes and has movie nights and date nights and no fucking clue that they were seconds away from being dragged down into a hell dimension a couple weeks ago, so Family Video is still open for them. Fuck that. 
“You’ve gotta handle the customers today because if someone starts asking me stupid questions I can’t promise I won’t snap at them,” Steve tells Robin as he drives them to their shift. 
“Aw, but it’s so funny when you snap at them,” Robin quips. 
“Robin.” He gives her his best I’m so fucking serious look. 
Her humor dries up immediately and she nods solemnly. “Alright, yeah. I got it.” 
Steve sighs, pulling into the parking lot. “Thank you.” 
He busies himself with cataloging and reshelving and rewinding returns while Robin takes over the customer service part of the job. It’s mindless - mind-numbing - the monotony of the tasks exactly what Steve needs to dull out the thoughts in his brain and distract himself from the way the back of his hand still tingles from Eddie’s kiss. 
When the afternoon rush dies down after a few hours and the store is all but empty, Robin sidles up next to him where he’s putting away a stack of fantasy films. “Hey.” 
Her voice cuts through his focus and nearly startles Steve out of his skin. “Jesus! Don’t sneak up on me like that.” 
“Sorry.” She grabs half the stack of tapes and starts helping him shelve. “Just wanted to check in with you, we haven’t gotten much of a chance to talk today. How are things going with Eddie?” 
“It’s fine. He’s fine,” Steve grumbles, glaring down at the tape in his hands. It’s got a dragon on the cover. He thinks Eddie would probably like it. “He still doesn’t remember me, but he’s starting to see me as a friend now at least, so.” Steve shoves the movie into its spot on the shelf. “That’s something, right?” 
Robin raises her eyebrows at the sharp bitterness in his tone and how forcefully he put the tape away. “Okay. Yeah. So I see we’re in the anger stage of grief now,” she comments. 
Steve scoffs. If this is a stage of grief, he thinks he’s been going through them in the wrong order, or maybe all at once - a neverending ebb and flow of denial and anger and depression all swirled together into one fucked up cocktail of grief. “I’m not angry,” he says, rubbing his hands over his face. “I’m just tired- emotionally burnt out, I don’t know. I just miss him and it’s not fair and I’m so fucking sick of feeling like this.” 
“Yeah, that’s anger, Steve,” Robin says, infuriatingly blunt. She slides the last tape in her stack into its place and then leans against the shelf. “Did something else happen to set this off, or are you just generally overwhelmed?” 
Steve sags against the shelf beside her. “Both. I don’t know. It’s stupid, it’s so fucking stupid. He just- he kissed my hand this morning, that’s it, and it wrecked me.” 
“He what?” Robin questions, curiosity widening her eyes. 
“He kissed my hand,” Steve repeats. He sighs and adds context, gives her a full recount of the events of that morning.
“Oh my god?!” Robin practically squawks as she backhands Steve’s arm, which is definitely not the comforting words or touch he needs from her right now. 
“Ow!” he yelps, rubbing his arm. “What the hell was that for?” 
“Dude. He was flirting with you,” she tells him, eyes even wider now like she’s trying to explain to him something obvious. 
“What? No.” Steve shakes his head, looking at her like she’s crazy. “He definitely wasn’t.” 
“Ughhh,” Robin lets out a long, dramatic groan, dragging her hands down her cheeks and pulling down her eyes. “I cannot do this with you two again. He totally was.” She drops her hands from her face so she can use them to illustrate her point as she starts to lists off, “First of all, he literally called you daddy-” 
“As a joke,” Steve interrupts to protest. 
“Yeah, a flirtatious one,” Robin retorts. She continues, “Then he said you have a magic touch, and then his heart literally started racing for no reason-”
“Because I was stressing him out!” 
“Only after his heart rate went up in the first place, which, as I was saying, was for no reason other than the fact that you were smiling at him and holding his hand-” 
“That literally doesn’t-” 
“And then, he kissed your hand - pressed his lips to your skin - and told you that you were his good luck charm,” Robin finishes, looking smug like she’s said something novel and not just completely reiterated exactly what Steve had just told her only with more emphasis. 
He sighs wearily. “Your point?” 
“He likes you, dingus,” she says, whacking his arm again. “Don’t you get it? His mind may not remember still, but his heart is starting to.”
Steve doesn’t know what to do with that. A lump rises in his throat, a rush of jumbled emotions chafing against his already frayed edges. “Don’t say that. You don’t know that.”
“I think you should tell him what you were to each other,” Robin suggests. 
“Right, yeah, okay, sure,” Steve scoffs, somewhere between sarcastic and hysterical. “And while we’re at it, I think you should tell Vickie that you like her. Because telling people things like that is so easy, isn’t it?” 
Robin gives him a withering stare. “That is not the same thing at all, and you know it.”
“No, yeah, you’re right,” he agrees. “Because I know Eddie, and he would not take that news well. He already gets a little weird whenever I seem to know too much about him - if I tell him I know him biblically too-” 
“Ew, don’t tell him like that!” 
“Doesn’t matter if I tell him like that; I say we’ve been together for 9 months, he’s going to assume we’ve-” 
“God, okay, I get it!”
“See? It would freak him out,” Steve concludes, crossing his arms. “Even if he does…like me again or whatever, he definitely wouldn’t anymore and it would just generally make him uncomfortable. So I can’t tell him. I just have to keep waiting for him to remember on his own, even though it’s fucking killing me,” he says, his voice harsh as he tries to keep it from breaking. “It’s what’s best for Eddie.” 
“Steve-” Robin starts, frowning like she’s only just beginning to realize she may have pushed him too far, but whatever it is she was going to say is cut off by the ringing of the bell that announces the front door being open. 
“Customers.” Steve points his chin towards the couple who just walked in, a bitter jealousy boiling in his stomach as he watches them walk hand in hand towards the romance aisle. It’s not fucking fair. He shoves himself away from the shelves and mutters, “I’m taking my break.”
He stalks to the breakroom, closes the door, and sinks to the floor with his back against it. The tears in his eyes feel like they’re made of acid, like they would carve tracks into his skin if they were to spill down his cheeks. He wraps his arms around himself again. The thoughts in his head are made of acid too, bitter and burning and cursing everyone who gets to enjoy their lover's touch while he suffers without his. 
Steve’s brain feels corroded, corrupted. “He likes you,” Robin’s words echo there too, “his mind may not remember still, but his heart is starting to.” Would Eddie touch him now if he asked? Would he trace his fingers across Steve’s skin, kiss more than just the back of his hand? Steve digs his own fingers into his sides. He feels gross, he feels rotten. It wouldn’t be right to ask that of Eddie without him knowing the truth, to take advantage of him like that. It wouldn’t be the same, anyways. The superficial touch of a boy with the beginnings of a crush is not the tender lover’s caress that Steve craves. 
That is if Robin is even right about Eddie redeveloping feelings. Which she probably isn’t.
Steve’s just being stupid and selfish again. He wants to remove his brain from his skull so he can stop thinking, tear his heart from his chest so he can stop feeling; both so burned and decayed he thinks if he held them in his hands they would dissolve and crumble to dust and ash and sludge between his fingers. 
Fifteen minutes pass, and Steve forces himself to be fine. He peels himself off the breakroom floor and returns to work, continues the tedious tasks that he hopes will numb him out again. 
Robin catches his eye from across the room where she’s sorting a customer’s cash at the register. I’m sorry, her expression says, I didn’t mean to make you upset. 
Steve gives a tiny shake of his head and a small smile. It’s okay. It wasn’t your fault, his own expression reassures her. You meant well. I’m not mad at you. 
They don’t talk about Eddie again that day. The next time there’s a lull in customers and they’re able to chat again, Steve tells Robin he honestly just needs a distraction right now, and he lets her ramble on about Vickie and band and school and her impending graduation and the movie she watched last night and whatever other random thoughts are bouncing around that hyperactive head of hers. Her voice fills in the cracks in Steve’s brain, keeps it from falling apart completely. She’s always been good at that, and he’s grateful for it. 
Then he drops Robin off after work and he drives away alone in silence because all the songs on the radio are love songs, and he drives back to the hospital - back to the source of his grief again and again like some sort of fucking masochist - because Eddie needs him. Because Steve loves him.
~
Eddie cannot help the way his face all but beams the second Steve walks back into his room that evening. “There you are, Stevie! How was work?”
Steve returns the smile, genuine, but there’s a tiredness to it. “It was alright. Bit boring, really, uneventful. How are you doing?” 
“I’m good,” Eddie says, adding with a jaunty grin, “All the better now that you’re back.” 
It comes out a bit more flirtatious than he intended, but thankfully Steve just laughs it off. “Alright, smoothtalker,” he scoffs through a chuckle as he takes his usual seat by the bed. “It’s nice to see you again too.”
“Oh, the actual doctor came in to talk to me today. Good news, don’t worry,” Eddie tells him, the last bit tacked on quickly before that concerned crease can appear between Steve’s brows. “She says I’m healing up nicely, and I might be able to be discharged soon. A few more days’ observation and then they're gonna see how well I can actually move since, you know, the bats chewed through half the muscles in one of my legs. But, yeah, I could be out of here by the end of next week.” 
“That’s great, Eddie!” Steve brightens. 
“Yeah.” Eddie smiles. “I can’t wait to be somewhere familiar, feel normal again. Or, well,” he amends, smile falling a little as he realizes, “as normal as I can feel given that I’ll probably be walking with a limp for the rest of my life and be covered in nasty scars all over.” 
A strange expression crosses Steve’s face then, something happy and sad and sympathetic all at once, and his voice is soft as he says, “We’ll match.” 
Eddie blinks at him. “What?”
“The scars,” Steve clarifies. “The bats got me too, you know. I was lucky, it wasn’t as bad for me as it was for you, but, uh- yeah, we’ll match. See?” He stands and pulls his shirt up a bit. 
Eddie’s heart rate immediately kicks up again, blood growing warm, as his eyes snap to Steve’s stomach, to skin and muscle and body hair and- oh. Two giant, jagged red scabs cover Steve’s sides, the edges fading into skin bumpy and pink and white with the beginnings of scarring. The bite on Eddie’s own side twinges in sympathy. “That’s-” He swallows back the word hot, and breathes out instead, “Holy shit.” Without really thinking, he finds himself reaching out to skim his fingers over the ridges of Steve’s scars. 
Steve gasps - full body shudders - at the touch, and Eddie instantly pulls his hand back, afraid he’s hurt him. “Sorry,” he mutters.
“No, it’s fine,” Steve manages, though it sounds a bit shaky. “You didn’t hurt me, I just- I wasn’t expecting it.” 
Eddie tentatively starts to reach back out; Steve nods. He slowly traces the outline of the wound again, every uneven edge, feeling the evidence of hurt and the evidence of healing and the ripple of each breath Steve takes - breaths that echo in the quiet that falls between them. Eddie doesn’t realize just how intimate this silence has become as he runs his hands across Steve’s skin, until he glances up to find Steve just…watching him. It’s impossible to tell exactly what emotion is behind his eyes, but it’s intense and it’s devastating, and Eddie suddenly feels like he can’t breathe. 
“Uh-” A nervous laugh stutters out of him. He rescinds his touch. “Twin scars, huh?” he remarks, cracking a crooked smile and attempting to change this strange, suffocating energy with a joke. “Hell of a matching tattoo. Next time let’s just exchange friendship bracelets like normal people do, yeah?”
Steve huffs, a short burst of laughter that escapes from his chest like it’s been punched out of him. “Since when have you ever done anything like a normal person?” he teases in return as he pulls his shirt back down.
Just like that, blown away by Steve’s playful smile, the weird tension lifts. Eddie grins back. “Alright, fair point.” He adds, “Those are gonna be some pretty metal scars, Stevie.”
“Not as metal as yours,” Steve says warmly, settling back in his chair and kicking one leg over the other. “You’re the one that literally survived death, Ed. It doesn’t get any more metal than that.” 
“Now who’s the smoothtalker?” Eddie smirks, and he hopes he isn’t blushing. Steve Harrington calling him metal with so much pride and affection in his voice is doing numbers on his heart. Curse this stupid fucking crush.
Steve eyes divert briefly to the heart monitor, which has not once calmed down since the second he’d lifted up his shirt, and Eddie is so sure that he knows then, that he’s finally made the connection between what’s got Eddie’s heart racing, but he doesn’t say anything, just laughs it off again, smiling like everything’s completely normal as he looks back at Eddie and rolls his eyes and mutters in return, “Shut up.” 
“Make me,” Eddie mumbles, not quick enough to bite back the words before they fall from his mouth, only managing to lower his voice enough that maybe Steve didn’t hear him. 
“What?” 
“TV?” Eddie grabs the remote, pretends like that’s what he’d said in the first place. Real smooth. 
“Oh, sure.” Steve shrugs. If he noticed Eddie’s slip, he gives no indication of it. 
Eddie turns on the TV and they spend the next hour or so laughing and making fun of the bad acting on the show that’s playing. Easy, normal, platonic. Eddie’s heart rate stabilizes, remaining even so long as he doesn’t look too long at Steve’s smile. 
When sleep starts lapping at Eddie’s consciousness, he doesn’t fear it anymore. Silently, he holds out his hand, and Steve takes it, wrapping him in the warmth and protection that allows Eddie to let himself drift off undaunted. 
And in his dreams his hands skate across Steve’s skin again.
(part seven)
taglist (CLOSED): @romanticdestruction @daydreamsandcrashingwaves @paintsplatteredandimperfect @hallucinatedjosten @mugloversonly @estrellami-1 @alongcomesaspider @thatonebadideapanda @tell-me-a-secret-a-nice-one @dragonmama76 @wxrmland @nuggies4life @sirsnacksalot @myguiltyartpleasure @lolawonsstuff @marklee-blackmore @vinteraltus @sebastiansstanswhore @0happyeverafter0 @scarlet-malfoy @hotluncheddie @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @emsgoodthinkin @alyelf @warlordess @stevesbipanic @lil-gremlin-things @rockandrolodex @badcaseofcasey @bat-outta-hel @fandomcartographer @manda-panda-monium @littlewildflowerkitten @giopandaonice @mightbeasleep @queenie-ofthe-void @krazyperson @worldofshea @marvel-ous-m @tartarusknight @a-little-unsteddie @xenon-demon @goodolefashionedloverboi @xxsky-shockxx @mc-i-r @bookbinderbitch @aspenshade88 @slowandsteddie @thedragonsaunt @daydreaming-mood @space-invading-pigeon @irregular-child @a-lovely-craziness (taglist continued in replies; please lmk if you'd like to be removed from this list. if you didn't make the taglist but still wanna follow along, you can follow the tag #dyfamsteddiefic to keep up with new updates!)
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minty364 · 25 days
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DPXDC Prompt #58 Part 3
Gotham Academy High School was the sort of school where almost everyone was elite in some way or another. Some of them were from old money like Damian who held himself up to a very high standard in his academics and was the top of the class. Others from new money like Dash and the rest of his cohorts became very hateful of somebody like Danny who was given a scholarship by Bruce Wayne, in their eyes Danny was taking advantage of Damian not even knowing that Damian approached Danny for companionship two years ago.
This also meant that everyone including the teachers would compare Danny and Damian to each other even though they weren’t brothers. That didn’t matter though as Danny was associated with them so that was all the reason they needed.
Danny groaned as he sunk into the seat next to Damian. The lunchroom was filled with chatting students and Danny was glad he shared the next class with Damian, which happened to be English. Dash never bothered Danny when Damian was around, probably because Damian had threatened the jock. How he was threatened Danny didn’t know, Damian never told him what happened and he was a little scared to ask. 
The guy hadn’t stopped harassing Danny since he and Jazz transferred a couple years ago. The school year had barely begun and Dash had made Danny his primary target like he was making up for lost time over the summer. Danny sighed as he dropped his paper bagged lunch on the table with a little plop. Jazz had packed for him this morning hopefully before his parents arrived and contaminated the entire kitchen.
“Dash again?” his sister asked across the table, she was seated next to Tim.
“I was paired against him in dodgeball again,” Danny lamented, his head resting on his arms that were crossed on the table.
“Danny, could you just talk to Mr. Lancer or something?” Jazz asked before she took a bite from her sandwich.
Danny sighed again and unpacked his lunch, “I have but no one will listen! They all act like I’m lying or something.” The teachers at this school probably wouldn’t listen to a charity case like him. Dash was a football player and had plans to become captain of the team. Everyone at the school loved Dash and it was precisely why everyone except maybe the four students at the table they were seated looked down and sometimes even bullied Danny.
Danny ignored it all eventually, it was better just to let the jock tire himself out. 
Once Danny and Damian finished eating they made their way to English. Luckily it was easy to carry the material for a class that only required a small binder and whatever book they were reading, in this case it was ‘gone with the wind’. Danny didn’t really care about reading old literature like this but he did what he had to maintain the grades he had. He’d endure anything, even Dash’s bullying, to become an astronaut.
Danny could hardly concentrate today through his afternoon classes. For some reason he had a bad feeling that something was going to happen. He tried his best to ignore it, he was probably just tired or something. Soon the school day was out and Danny packed up whatever homework he had for the day and headed outside to wait with Jazz. Damian and Tim were probably wrapping up their classes. Tim had an AP class that ran an extra 30 minutes and Damian’s last class was art, they were doing a painting and it wasn’t unusual for Damian to finish up what he was working on as he found out over the last few years that he enjoyed painting.
“… Do you think it’ll work?” Jazz asked a hint of hesitation in her voice. Danny knew she was talking about the portal, the both of them had talked about it before. Danny glanced over at his sister, he could tell she was having trouble sleeping lately, her face looked tired and her posture was stiff with her arms crossed in front of her. Both of them had anxiety about the possibilities the portal possessed, and they were especially worried that their parents wouldn’t take it well if the portal didn’t work. 
He was equally concerned that it would work. “I hope not…” he said eventually. It was something that brought the siblings closer as the whole of their family fell apart. How their parents managed to pull off getting the funding in the first place seemed to be a miracle. Everyone called their parents crazy and dismissed all of their science as ludicrous garbage.
Danny wondered how they even managed to stay under Batman's radar, he thought that something like this would be cause for the vigilante to look into it but maybe the thought of ghosts was just that outlandish that even the dark knight himself thought it to be crazy too. Danny himself didn’t believe in anything his parents published, some of the papers even seemed to be biased somehow, even though his parents hadn’t ever actually encountered a ghost. That last part was probably the reason no one bothered to actually investigate his parents, there wasn’t really much to investigate.
The siblings waited in silence and eventually Tim and Damian showed up after their classes and the four headed to Alfred waiting by the car. 
If anyone tried to start a conversation with Danny he wasn’t paying attention. If he was being honest, his parents' portal scared him a lot. He wasn’t sure why he felt so nervous about it, both him and Jazz renounced the thought that ghosts could exist. Something deep down in his guts told him that he should turn and run, that what his parents were attempting was taboo and that his parents were tampering with forces unimaginable. 
No one was going to listen to a fourteen year old though so Danny kept his feelings to himself and ignored them. 
Soon they were pulled in front of their apartment and true to their word, Damian and Tim asked Alfred to park nearby. Danny and Jazz took a hesitant glance at each other as they walked into the house. 
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sirbird · 3 months
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Chapter 15 has had me in a chokehold for a while 🧍‍♂️
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(un)dead beat dad (Chapter 1)
I hope you all suffer as much as my beta readers do, love you guys @justagaygoosehoard and @le-maidenless
and for those of you who wanted to be tagged, enjoy :) @starkcravingmad @terzatheunderscorerima @sunsetdew0101 @onyxlightdragon @ace-aro-agender @roseinbloom02 @aikoiya @blacksea21090 @the-legal-shipper @paperlicense687 @cursedchaosboys @corfinnsunrise @ascetic-orange @eonic @frostedthroughghost @readerkayden @reach-for-the-horizon @xno-more-smilesx @undead-essence @bluebeariis
edit: please ignore my misspellings im super sick :)
Danny spits blood onto the floor of the tower he was in, his hand pressed against the cuts in his chest, barely holding himself together. He cursed as he felt the ice melting around his chest and dripping to the floor. With a shaky breath, he froze it up again, not as thick this time though. Damn. Danny stood, using the wall to stabilize himself. Smearing his glowing green blood all over the wall. He stumbled up the stairs, spilling puddles of green throughout his walk. He got to the top and fell into the door, black impeding his vision as the large blue-skinned figure floated towards him. “Heya clocky,” Danny whispered with a wet chuckle as he lost consciousness fully, slumping to the floor in a pile of green blood as the white rings encompassed his body.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Fuck” clockwork said out loud. Somehow, some way, he had not seen this reality. I mean, of course, he had seen the realities where the Fentons had reacted… badly… to say the least. And of course, he had seen the realities where Danny ventured into the ghost zone to find help, hell he had seen every single one and ancients did his heart ache at those. But this? Clockwork hadn’t seen a reality where Danny came to him. How had he not seen that? How had he glossed over that reality? Maybe if he went back through all of those again and tried another time, maybe he could see what he was supposed to do to stop this, maybe he could see what direction he was supposed to go, maybe he could see what he's supposed to do now-
A cough cut him out of his thinking. For once, time is the thing he didn’t have. He thought quickly, what was he supposed to do? He can’t take care of Danny himself, and Danny wont last much longer if he just stays here thinking but ancients what is he supposed to do…. Clockwork snaps his fingers and carefully picks Danny up in a bridal carry, careful not to upset the angry-looking Y-shaped wound on his chest bleeding through his torn medical scrubs. Clockwork waved his staff the best he could while holding Danny, making a portal, and floating through.
~~~~~~~~~
Gotham had been having a wonderful night. Her knights had taken down more than a few of her least favorite assholes, and, as a reward, she made the sky a bit more clear. She loved when those stars shone through her sky. Well, her night had been going well, until she felt a familiar portal open up behind her. 
“Ahhhh, my favorite stuck-up bastard. How's it going clockwork? Time treating you well?” She said in her sweet new-jersey accent; snickering and smiling at her pun, taking a drag of her cigarette. Holding the opera-length cigarette holder just past her lips, she blew out the smoke. She rested her other hand on her hip, her sparkling sangria-colored dress flowing over her plump hips. She turned around, her gorgeous crown of black corkscrew curls coming together in a beautiful afro, bouncing as she looked at clockwork. She took a moment to assess the bleeding boy in his arms before looking clockwork in his ruby eyes. “Clockwork, love, what the fuck.”
Clockwork sighed and floated toward Gotham. “This boy… This is the king. He was attacked in his own home by his guardians. He came to me but… but I've never seen this timeline. I wasn’t sure what to do with the boy, but I knew you had knights that could protect him.” Clockwork stared down at the boy in his arms. Gotham took a moment to digest the new information.
“The king, his majesty phantom, is this boy?” Gotham asked, disbelief clear in her voice, Clockwork only nodded and held out the boy to Gotham. 
“Yes, he is. I don’t have anyone else to bring him to. I’ll make this easier on you, as thanks.” Clockwork said, handing Danny to Gotham. Gotham flicked the cigarette and its holder out of existence, her feathered boa tickling the boy now in her arms.
“A bit scrawny, is he not?” She smiled lovingly down at the boy king. Clockwork smiled at the two and brought his hand to Dannys' head, a deep blue glow found its way between his hand and the boy king. Gotham stared in wonder as Danny shrunk in her arms. She looked at Clockwork in disbelief for a moment. “Clockwork, I usually do not question your ways, but what are you doing this for?”
“All as it should be. Good luck Danny.” Clockwork smiled and patted the small boys black hair, though it was caked in blood.
Gotham looked down at the boy in her arms, “Daniel. A name fit for a king. Now, I know exactly which of my knights to bring you to. No need to worry your highness, He will take care of you as none else have.” She turned her head to where clockwork was with a thank you on her lips, seeing he already left. She huffed in annoyance and turned towards the streets of her city, she knows exactly where her knight is.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Jason was having one hell of a night. I mean, the muggings, a robbery, and the riddler? A great night, really. Well, his patrol was finally over, so he crawled through the fire escape to his house and stilled at the chill in the air. Someone else was in his apartment. Jason swung his arm around, pistol cocked and ready to fire, pointing at…. Nothing? A huff of laughter came from the too-dark shadows in the corners of his living room. A tall woman with deep ebony skin sashayed her way from the shadows, a gorgeous dress hugging her thick curves in all the best ways. She smiled at Jason and held the boy in her arms higher, so Jason could see him.
“My knight. I have a request of you, a friend of mine has placed this boy in my care, but I know nothing of raising children.” Jason tried to cut her off with a ‘you think I know jack-shit about kids either???’ but she shushed him with a wave of her hand as she laid the small boy on his beat-up couch. “Of all of my knights, I have deemed you to be the most well-suited to take on this task. This is Daniel, High King of the Infinite Realms. Though he looks younger than he truly is, do not underestimate him. He needs medical attention and someplace to call home. You, Jason, are the best and only option for this task.” Jason stood there dumbfounded. Who the fuck does this lady think she is? Coming out of nowhere giving him a kid and talking to him as if she knew him? And she knows his secret identity! 
Jason went to say something but found no words on his tongue as the woman before him dissolved into smoke before his eyes, leaving a bloody kid on his couch. Jason sighed and took off his mask, leaving only his domino. “Well, fuck me I guess” He ran his fingers through his sweaty hair and took off his jacket. Who on earth was that? And how did she disappear like that? How on earth did she get into his apartment? Why did she leave a bloody kid- oh fuck the kid-
Jason stopped what he was doing and stared at the bloody kid on his couch. The kid looked bout six, if he had to guess, but was far too skinny for a healthy six-year-old. Jason paced over silently and let his eyes wander over the small boy. Jason breathed out a small ‘fuck’ and bent down to where the kid's eyes were and tapped his shoulder… nothing. He tapped again and a small groan escaped the boy, huh. Jason gently shook the boy and watched as the small boy's eyes fluttered open to reveal an icy blue. The kid took a moment to adjust, as he glanced around the room, his eyes landing on Jason. Immediately, the boy jumped up, falling over the backside of the couch with a loud thump, scooting to the wall behind him. Well… that wasn’t, exactly what Jason was expecting. Loud heaving breaths were heard behind the couch and jason crawled around, to peak at the boy. As soon as his eyes found the kid, his breath hitched in his throat. That's a lot of blood.
“Hey bud,” Jason started softly, “your names Danny, right?” He asked. Jason tried to scoot closer but when the bleeding boy in front of him moved he stopped. The boy Danny glanced over Jason, taking a minute to observe him before deeming Jason safe, nodding his head yes.
“Well, I’m Red Hood, nice to meet you. A friend of yours dropped you off with me, said you're a king or something?” Jason said slowly, lowering himself to sitting criss-cross on the floor. Danny blushed heavily in front of Jason. 
“They… they said that?” Danny said, his voice squeaking out. Danny looked confused for a second and quickly glanced down at his body, ‘he's so small’ Jason thought. Apparently, Danny thought the same as he looked at his body in confusion flipping his hands over in front of his eyes. Jason moved again snapping the boys’ attention back to him.
“So, Danny, Your friend said that you needed some help and that I could help you out. If you trust this friend, I’ll trust them too. You don’t have to trust me right away, but know I’ll help you out the best I can, okay? Sound good?” Jason said, turning his palms flat up to show he wasn’t a threat. Danny took a second to think about it and nodded his head again, slowly, but hey a yes is a yes.
“Alright, kid, we need to get you patched up, I have a friend who can get you fixed right up-” Jason was cut off by the boy frantically shaking his head
“oookay, uh, no hospitals?” Jason guessed. 
A slow nod. 
“My friend’s clinic?” 
A shake.
“Well, I can't do it myself…” Jason smiled in realization “What about my grandpa? He patches me up when I’m out on patrol, that sound good kid?”
There was a moment of silence. Jason was thinking he might have to just call Alfred at this point when the kid hesitantly nodded. Jason let out a sigh. “Alright kid, I’m gonna have to carry you there, okay? “ another nod. Jason scolded over and carefully scooped Danny up in his arms and walked over to his still-open window and crawled out.
“I’ll be as careful as I can, alright? Let me know if anything hurts.” Danny nodded again and Jason carefully hopped off his fire escape, he wasn’t getting any sleep tonight.
Chapter 2
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jayflrt · 5 months
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𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 𝐂𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐌𝐀𝐒! 08. good girls get their microwaves back
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SUMMARY ▸ in which sunghoon hates christmas, so you consult wikihow to get him in the holiday spirit.
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plush-rabbit · 11 months
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Simmering and Smothering
Part 2 to It’s Always Coffee
Word Count: 7K
A/N: I’m soft for this guy rn. He’s so !!! Anyways, I um don’t know what else to say
- You stand with a group of people, a lanyard hangs from your neck, and you pinch at the plastic cover that holds a card reading “Visitor” stuck on it. People part of the group peek through windows, trying to catch a glimpse of the wonders behind the glass. You're sure at some point you saw Dr. Ohnn standing close to a coworker. He must have felt your gaze, because he looked up and you had to fist your hand to restrain yourself from waving at him. But when the scientist beside him puts their hand on his back, returning his attention to the project in front, you find yourself digging your nails into the flesh of your palms.
You look around, but nothing catches your eye as it should at Alchemax. While you knew that they wouldn’t show a tour group all the dark and gritty experiments, a part of you wishes that you were able to slip away to explore, but any chances of that were snuffed out with a warning at being kicked out and banned should you stray. However, you do enjoy getting to step foot into the building. The group is led through glass doors, and you hear a few people sigh in relief. Walking in, windows line the room and let in a nice glow of sun. 
“Okay,” Dr. Octavius says with a clap of her hands, “this is the cafeteria where we will be having lunch. Those tables over there-” she points over to a cluster of tables that have been protected with stanchions- “will be where you all will be eating. Lunch is one hour, and if anyone needs to go to the restroom, please contact a security guard.” Her gaze is friendly, smile wide and tone with the slightest hint of superiority, she speaks to all, before her gaze lands on you, her smile falling ever-so-slightly. “If you fail to inform a guard, and are caught wandering, you will be immediately removed from the premises.” Smiling, you give her an “okay” symbol, and in response, she looks away from you. “Okay!” She chirps, taking a step to the side, she sweeps her arms towards the selection of food. “Enjoy your lunch.”
You’re at a cart, holding a tray consisting of fruits, and a bottle of juice. You peer over the selection of bread, holding a saran wrapped bagel. You pull your mouth into a line, wanting to put it back, but unsure if that’s okay to do so. Sure, it’s saran wrapped, but what if it’s not okay to place things back. You’ve already picked it up, and with a sigh, you place it on your tray. You look over the rest of the selection of the grains, and perk up at the sight of a muffin. Happily, you reach to grab at it before your wrist is grabbed at.
“Hey-” You bark out, pulling your hand out of the grasp and turning to look at whoever it was that clutched your wrist. You stop short when you realize that it’s Dr. Ohnn. “I feel like we talked about appropriate ways to greet others,” you muse, grabbing at the saran wrapped muffin. 
“What are you doing here?” he hisses, and you frown. 
Your eyes scan his face, and you fold the tray closer to you. “You’re upset,” you conclude, tilting your head with furrowed brows. 
“Of course I am,” he hisses. Your ears begin to burn, and you look around the cafeteria, many of the patrons sitting down and ignoring you- including the tour group you are a part of. When you look back at him, he continues. “Why are you here?”
“I’m part of the tour.” You jerk your head over where your tour members sit behind the stanchions. “Fisk was promoting it- something to show off Alchemax and how family-friendly it is. But if you ask me, I think it’s just a cover to stop people from asking-”
“I don’t care,” he rushes. 
You pull your lips into a thin line. “Okay, you don't have to be rude.” His eyes widen, and his shoulders rise. He opens his mouth, but you press forward. “Listen, I paid my way in, okay? If you’re upset with it, then I don’t know what to tell you.” He stays silent and you look back to your group. Turning back to him, you start. “Is that all, Dr. Ohnn? May I go sit down, or do you want to continue reprimanding me?”
He opens and closes his mouth, and when you turn on your heel, he calls your name. You turn to him with a waiting look. “I apologize.” You encourage him with a nod of your head. “I just-” he looks around, and grabs your wrist, pulling you to another station of food, grabbing a tray, and standing in front of the selection of fruits. 
“You just?”
“I hadn’t thought that you would be here. I-” with his middle finger, he pushes up his glasses by the bridge- “I wasn’t aware there was a tour going on.”
“Does that matter?” You ask, grabbing at a cup of peeled mandarins. 
“Scientists are usually the one to lead groups,” he says quietly, "due to the fact that it is our projects we are showcasing. We all take turns with it given that leading groups take time away from our projects. This should have been a group that I would have led. Dr. Octavius must have seen your name on the roster and decided to lead it for the day.” He gives you a look. “I’m surprised that she let you in.”
“I paid,” you shrug. “She isn’t happy about it or anything, but-” you end it with a shrug. “Anyways, I won’t bother your lunch or anything. I’m simply here to see the building and enjoy lunch.” You give him a smile as you lift up your tray. “Have a good day Dr. Ohnn.” You nod your head, ready to walk away before he stops you.
“Do you have to sit down with the others?” You turn to him, and look at him quizzically. “We um- We never finished our conversation from the other day.”
You tighten your grip on the tray. “Yeah,” you breathe out. “You kinda left without exchanging numbers. But I don’t think I’m allowed to sit elsewhere.” You look back at your group. “I’d invite you to sit with me, but I’m not sure if I could give you quite a riveting conversation as your work buddies.”
“You can. You have,” he says so, without any hesitation. “Our last conversation was entertaining.” 
"You think so?" 
He opens his mouth, before being interrupted by someone calling his name. "Jonathan," calls someone far too cheery from the door. A few heads turn to watch as another scientist- you think that they look familiar- and turn back around once the scientist enters the cafeteria. They turn on their heel to wave at another and it clicks- it's the scientist that touched his back.
You look back to the doctor, giving him a raised look. He has a sort of flush that colors in his face, and you purse your lips together. 
The scientist walks toward the both of you, but their attention is solely on Jonathan. "Jonathan-" they say his name with a sickly sweet tone- "I thought you were going to wait for me so we can have lunch together." They smile brightly at the other and you watch as they reach over to squeeze at his bicep. "You hadn't forgotten, had you?"
"My apologies, Dr. Owens." You don't miss the way that he refers to the scientist by their last name while they refer to him by his first. A frown tugs at corner of your lips- they refer to him by his first name. You glance between the two and a pit settles in your stomach. "I hadn't forgotten, but I got distracted. It must have slipped my mind."
"You don't normally get distracted," they note, and their eyes dart at you. With the consequence of being acknowledged, you smile at them. "Ah. Part of the tour group, huh? No wonder you bothered our precious doctor." They're far too sweet with their words, it makes you uncomfortable. You open your mouth to apologize, but they continue on. “I was wondering if we could get the chance to go over our notes?” You feel as if you're in the middle of something. Standing besides Dr. Owens, you feel unsure of yourself. You clear your throat. They turn to you, and their smile is beaming. “Ah, I didn't mean to interrupt. While I’m sure Dr. Ohnn would love to engage with others about theories and his work, I do have to steal him away from you.” Their smile turns gentle, and you feel silly standing between them. “Sorry,” they apologize with a smile. 
"Uh, yeah." You grit your teeth- that came out less eloquently than you would liked. "Sorry, Dr. Ohnn." You tap your heel against the ground. “I’ll leave you to it.”
"Oh- Um-” he looks at you, and you smile at him, shrugging your shoulders. He returns his look towards the other scientist, and you let your gaze drift down. You walk away, catching only a glimpse of their conversation. “What would you like to discuss?”
Sitting down at a designated table, the other tour members greet you. You smile and pick at your bagel, taking small bites, regretting not getting some kind of topping. You bite at your muffin, nodding along as the other group members talk about the experiments going on at the building. 
It would make sense for him to have a partner. He's attractive, and has a good job. With the one conversation that you've had with him, he was well spoken. You eat your mandarins, letting the citrus fill your mouth. Dr. Owens isn’t unattractive and they certainly seemed nice. You do your best not to look at the doctor and his partner, keeping your head down as you listen to the other people in your group. 
You know why you feel so bothered by it all. It’s dumb. You only had one actual conversation with him, but it was nice. He was nice- much nicer than you had ever given him credit for. You feel silly over being jealous of a man you only knew for a minute. 
-
"Fuckin' driver," you mutter under your breath, your lips curled in disgust. Fixing yourself, you cross your arms and decide to walk to the train station. It's incredibly late and something that you actively avoid doing, but you don't want to risk yourself with another driver. "Now I gotta walk." 
A part of you pays with the idea of putting in your headphones and at least having a calming walk, but you shake your head at that idea. You will not be murdered just because you wanted to listen to music. 
Headlights flash by and you bite the inside of your mouth every time. A car passes by, and you watch as the red tail lights blink on. You stop in your steps, taking a look around. No one else on the sidewalk acknowledges the car. 
“Okay”, you think to yourself, “I can't get abducted in front of other people.” You take a step forward and pause. “That's dumb. Yes, I can.” You scowl and tap your foot against the pavement, holding tighter onto the strap of your bag. 
However, no one else seems fazed by a car pulling over, and that gives you confidence to walk further. At the end of the car, you see the passenger window roll down. You hesitate again. Sucking in a breath, you roll your wrists, and as you walk past the car until you hear your name being called. 
You turn, and through the windshield, you see a familiar doctor waving at you. Looking around, you clutch onto the trap of your bag before making your way towards him.
"Dr. Ohnn?" 
He smiles nervously. He looks far too tense for someone in their own car. "Hello," he calls you by your name. "I was sure you would have left ages ago."
"Tour ran late- one of the kids explored without permission," you explain. 
"I'm surprised it wasn't you." You weren't aware he could tease. 
"I wasn't in the mood for any trespassing charges. Maybe tomorrow." You shrug, and send him a grin. “Who knows? Night’s still young and all.”
He turns his head, and you follow his gaze out onto the street before the both of you. "Why are you walking?"
“People had their own rides, and I didn't. I took the bus. After the whole fiasco, I missed it. I got into a taxi, but uh-" you roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest- "the driver was being too sleazy for my tastes so I decided to take my chances walking.” 
“Oh- I’m sorry to hear about that.” He leans over the middle console of the car, with his hand pressed down on the passenger seat. “It’s quite late,” he tells you.
Your lips stretch into a thin grin. “Correct. It’s no wonder that you’re one of the top scientists at Alchemax.”
“You’re hilarious,” he deadpans.
“I try,” you tell him. The soft glow of the streetlamps casts him in a warm glow. “But I'd be more inclined to believe you if you were actually laughing.”
“Yes, well, I’ll try to laugh next time.” He rolls his eyes, and you smile sharply at him. 
“Is that why you stopped? To hear my humor?” You tease, taking a step forward, and he tilts his head to look at you. 
“No, actually. I thought it was you,  and I wanted to know if you would like a ride?”
You’re taken aback. “Oh! Um- No, it’s okay. I’m okay,” you correct yourself. You turn looking down the street where the crowd of people slows. You look back at him. “I’m sure you have your own plans for the night. I wouldn’t want to intrude or interrupt or anything.” You twist the strap of your bag in your hand. “While I appreciate the offer, you don’t have to worry about me Dr. Ohnn.”
“You wouldn’t be interrupting anything. I don’t have any plans.” 
You stay silent, weighing your options in your head. While you’d like to be in a car and taken to your home, you also can’t just enter his car. Even if he is the one offering. No. You can’t. There has to be a line. You have a crush on him- maybe. You’re attracted to him. Wait, that’s actually worse. You shake your head.
“I shouldn’t.” You bite your bottom lip and look at the air freshener that hangs down the rearview mirror. “I would want to get you into any sorts of trouble.”
“Trouble?” He says in a quiet voice, but alarm is still laced into his words. 
“You know-” you wave your hand in front of you- “with Dr. Owens. Would they be okay with you giving me a ride?”
He gives you an incredulous look. “What does Dr. Owens have to do with this?”
Your chest begins to burn, and it travels upwards to your face. “Would they appreciate you giving a ride to a stranger?” 
“You aren’t a stranger,” the way that he calls your name has your breath hitching, and heart racing. “I wouldn’t feel comfortable with you walking so far to a station at night.”
“Okay,” you shrug. “But you have to put in the directions on your phone. I’m easily distracted and won’t be able to give you any good directions.”
“Fine by me,” he pulls away and the door unlocks. You open the door, and the window slowly raises. “Between you and I, I’m not entirely great with navigation.” The noise from the outside mutes as you close the door, the lock clicking down on itself.  You click the seatbelt as you give him a look. “I get lost easily,” he admits. He grabs his phone and sorts through his applications, finally passing it your way with the map function on display.
“Don’t you have a PhD?” You enter your address, and return the phone, watching as he places the phone on the holder stuck to the car. 
“Doesn’t mean a thing if a shopping center has me turned all sorts of ways,” he admits, setting the car to ‘drive’ and pulling away from the sidewalk. You laugh, it starts as a snort, and forms into a chuckle and it has you hiding your smile behind your hand, trying to quell the laughter. 
You turn to look at him, the corner of your lips tilting upwards and wrinkling at your eyes. “I don’t even think I could picture you getting lost in a mall.”
He sits up straighter, and casts a glance through the corner of his eye. “It isn’t a particularly good image of me,” he confesses.
Humming, you lean back into the seat, fixing your bag onto your lap, playing with the zipper. “No, I’m sure it is,” you hum. “A renowned scientist, lost at a mall.”
“It can be quite traumatizing.”
“I’m sure it can be,” you muse, trying to hide the smile that slowly grows. "Many children often fear the mall for that same reason." 
He scoffs at your remark. “Did you learn anything interesting on the tour?” He asks, and you cross your ankles.
“I think we learned about atoms?” He chuckles at that, and you feel warm. “I gotta be honest, I was hoping for something a bit more, ya know?” 
“Atoms aren't enough?” 
"Not nearly,” you tell him softly. “Maybe if they brought out some secret project or like showed some sort of light show, then I’d be impressed.”
“Oh, of course,” he says with sarcasm laced into his words. “A secret project shown to the masses, especially where one child had gone missing.”
“Explored,” you correct, turning our head to look at him.
The GPS voice speaks, and he misses a turn. He mumbles an apology, the application already rerouting him. “If you join another one, I’ll make sure that there’s a light show.” He casts a glance, and misses another turn, his hands tightening around the steering wheel. “I’m thirsty,” he tells you.
You blink at him. “You can stop somewhere and get something. I don’t mind waiting in the car.” The metal zipper of your bag shines under the passing streetlamps.. “You’re already doing me a favor by driving me home.”
“The coffee shop is still open. Would you mind accompanying me for a drink?”
“Oh! Uh, yeah- sure. I’d be okay with that. I still owe you that cup of coffee. You know, from when we met at the shop?”
He shakes his head. “Consider it my treat. I am inviting you after all.”
“But you did win that little wager, and you are driving me home. I could at least buy you a cup of coffee or something.” He shakes his head. “Come on-” you slap the back of your hand lightly against his bicep- “don’t make it difficult.”
“I’m not making it difficult,” he frowns.
The GPS continues to tell Dr. Ohnn to make a right when he can, and he fumbles with turning it off, grumbling under his breath until you offer your hand out. The phone is placed down, and you shut down the application. The phone is held in your hand, the application minimizing to show his background- a picture of- the phone is pulled out of your grasp.
“I don’t even get to learn what your background is?” You give a faux pout, leaning back against the seat. “Come on, I didn’t even get a chance.”
“Don’t worry too much about it,” he tells you. “It isn’t all that exciting.” You stick your tongue out at him in response and he fails to suppress a smile. 
Pulling to the side of the road, you place your bag on the floor, snagging your debit card before zipping the bag up. Getting out of the car, you’re careful not to slam the door. You rush to beat him from opening the door. “Okay,” you draw out the vowel, slipping to move in front of him, “how about this. You buy my cup, and I’ll buy yours. I’ll even let you get a pastry- you know as a thank you for driving me home.
“You don’t have to. I offered to drive you home, it was completely my own volition.”
You give an exaggerated sigh. “Whatever you say, but the offer is there.”
As he orders his drink, you press your card against the payment terminal, telling the barista that it’ll be two separate transactions. You can feel his eyes on you and you can only smile, nodding when the barista confirms. Lacking your energy, he pays when you order your own. You’re sure that the barista is annoyed with the two of you, but at this point, you had a win that he was owed. 
With the lack of patrons, the two of you find a table placed beside the window. The two of you sit across from each other, and wait for your drinks to be called. Tapping your hands against the table, you look out the window, watching the people and the cars. 
“I was more than happy paying for your drink,” he comments. 
You look at him through the reflection, and he meets your gaze there. “I know. But you’re already doing me such a favor by taking me home and stuff-” shrugging, you turn to face him- “might as well buy you a drink.”
“You didn’t have to,” he mumbles.
“I wanted to.”
Looking at you, he opens his mouth to speak, but closes it when he can’t find the right words. You nod, letting him take his time and to continue with whatever he is going to say. Clearing his throat, he can only get a breath out when the two of your names are spoken. You turn just in time to see the drinks placed on the counter as the barista walks away.
“I’ll go get them for us.” He stands from the table and you watch him. He takes long strides, his head bent and arms close to himself, as if trying to make himself to the public. You hadn’t realized that he had such squared shoulders. He almost reminds you of a rectangle.
Placing your drink in front of you, he takes a seat. His teeth bite at his bottom lip and he brings the cup to his lips. Placing the drink down, he clears his throat. “Why did you ask about Dr. Owens?”
Ah. Maybe you should’ve kept quiet about that. “What do you mean?”
“You mentioned that I would get in trouble with them if I had driven you home.”
“Oh um, yeah. It’s whatever, don’t worry about it.”
“I’m not worrying, I’m asking.”
“Okay,” you whisper, your gaze focused on your drink. “They just seemed into you is all. I thought there was something you know-” you lift your head looking at him- “between you and them.”
“You thought they were into me?” You choose to ignore the wonder in his voice. Opting to stay silent, you nod. “I can assure you, Dr. Owens is not into me.”
“It sure seemed that way,” you mumble into the rim of your drink. He stares at you, and you shift in your seat, hiding behind your cup. “What?”
“What made you think they were into me?” 
Your molars grind against each other. The rim of the cup is brought to your lips, but you don’t take a sip, you only press your lips against the opening, before lowering it back to the table. “Oh gosh, are you into them? Look, that's sweet and all, but I’d rather not play matchmaker to some scientists.” He stays silent, and you look outside the window, watching a couple walk past by. “You really wanna know?” He makes a noise of confirmation, and you let out a held breath. “In that little time that I saw the two of you, they had no trouble touching you. And they call you by your name, too.”
“My name?”
Nodding, you twist and untwist your legs. “Yeah.”
“Is that usually an indicator?” 
Lifting your hand, you make a see-saw motion. “Sometimes, I guess. Depends on how it’s used and all. Context, ya know?”
“I call other people by their names,” he counters. You nod, letting him continue. “I call you by your name.”
“Oh yeah- I um, I guess so,” you mumble, taking another sip of your drink, desperate to keep yourself busy.
“You never call me by my name.”
“I wasn’t aware that I was allowed.”
“Of course you are. Why wouldn’t you be allowed?”
“I always thought you found me annoying.”
“I did.” You frown, and he gives you an apologetic smile. His hand lifts up, grabbing at a strand of hair and twirling it around his finger. “That doesn’t mean that I disliked you. I have to admit-” he lets go of the strand and it falls back to place- “I always did find your drive admirable. You weren’t one to give up. You’re quite stubborn.” You stare at each for a few moments, heat blazing itself against your skin, making a chill over your body. He breaks eye contact and tilts the cup, making a circle with the bottom edge. “Do you really believe that Dr. Owens likes me because they call me by my name.” You nod, your mouth too dry despite the drink in your hand to even consider speaking. “Hm, okay,” he hums. His hand runs over his stubble, and you wonder if he’s growing out a beard. “You said that they touch me.”
“I um, saw the two of you in an office- while on the tour.” Your hand pulls up to scratch at your shoulder. You feel the need to hide from him.
His smile stretches even more. “I thought I was losing my marbles.” You take a sip of your drink. “I thought that after all my imagining about-” he clicks the last consonant, and you straighten yourself, leaning forward- “I thought that finally, after all of your incessant questioning, that I was beginning to imagine you.”
“Mhm,” you hum, taking another sip of your very diluted drink.
“You were saying.” He rolls his hand expectantly.
“When you turned around- when you saw me- they immediately turned you back around.”
“So? I believe we were discussing the recent project that we’ve both been assigned on”
Grabbing a napkin, you dab at the table where a ring of water from the condensation has formed on the table. “It was how they touched you. They touched your back and lingered their hand on you.”
“I’m not following.”
You make a noise of discomfort, and fist the wet napkin in your hand. “I can’t explain it in words. It’s- It’s in the details and stuff. The observer's point of view.”
“Can you show me?” 
“Like?”
“Touch me.”
The napkin is clenched tightly in your hand, your nails ripping through the soft paper. Warmth flushes through your body, and you fear that he can notice the change in you. You know that he doesn’t mean it that way, but for him to say something so- so, intimate sounding, without meaning to, made your heart skip a beat. His eyes widen, and he stumbles over his words. “No- Not- Not like that. I hadn’t meant for it- I’m so terribly sorry-”
“It’s fine,” you reassure, waving your hand in front of you. “It’s cool,” you smile at him and he stops his ramble of words. There’s a rapid beat that bruises inside of your chest at his words- even if he did mean them innocently. “But you know, they touched you at the cafeteria too. They went up to you and touched your bicep.” You lift your hand, reaching over the table, letting it hover over his forearm. Glancing at him, he’s watching you, and you close your fist, pulling your hand back to you. 
“And you believe that all of those actions are due to the fact that they like me?”
Shrugging, you suck in your bottom lip. “It’s just my theory,” you whisper, embarrassment laced into your words. “They wanted to eat lunch with you too.”
The two drinks remain untouched and outside, you can hear sirens. His hand lifts up to rub over his mouth, and he has this faraway look in his eyes. “Okay,” he mumbles. 
“Okay?”
“Is there anything else that you want to add?”
You pout. “No.”
In the corner of your eye, you see a worker clean a table with a rag. You watch for a moment, and turn your head when chairs are fixed back into their positions, scraping along the floor. A part of you feels unsure about the conversation. While you wouldn’t believe that the scientist had a crush on you, you had at least humored the idea, but knowing that he isn’t interested in you, makes you want to go home.
You open your mouth to speak, and he beats you to it. “I’m hungry,” he states.
“I told you you could have gotten a pastry,” you point out.
“I want dinner. An actual dinner.” Sitting straight, it’s as if he has a new resolve. “Are you hungry?”
Blinking in surprise, you lift your shoulders. “Oh, uh, yeah. I guess I could eat something.”
“Good,” he nods to himself, and stands up, the chair squeaks against the floor. You follow his eyes, looking up at him as he adjusts the chair and stands by the table. “I’d like for you to accompany me to dinner.” Clearing his throat, his shoulders bunch together, and any confidence that he did have, is slowly evaporating. “That- That is if you want to, of course.”
You scoff with a smile. “Yeah, I’m game with that, Dr. Ohnn.” 
“Jonathan. You can call me Jonathan. I don’t mind it if you call me that.” He twists his hands, interlocking them, and pulling on the back of his palm, his skin stretching thin over his knuckles. 
Straightening yourself, you nod. “Okay. Jonathan it is. The same um, goes to you of course. You can call me by my name.”
“I already do,” and the way that he says your name, softly and tenderly, held with a smile, makes you turn your head and scratch at your neck in a desperate attempt to hide how wide your smile is.
“Mhm,” you squeak out. Standing up, you make sure to push the chair in and grab at the loose napkins and your drink. 
Following behind you, he throws his drink into the trash. This time, he’s made sure that he stands in front of you, stretching his arm out to hold the door open for you. Mumbling, you thank him, standing beside the door as he goes to open the passenger side door.
None of what he’s doing is helping quell your attraction to the scientist.
Clicking his seatbelt, he starts the car, driving away from the coffee shop. “Do you have a preference?”
“On food?” He nods, fumbling with the radio that plays the song of the week. You tap your foot to the beat. “Um, I think I’m good with most stuff. Restaurants are pretty inclusive about diets and stuff most days.”
“There’s a burger place on the way to Alchemax, do you know the one I’m talking about?” 
“With the really good burgers?” 
“Yes. Would you like to go there?” 
“Isn’t that too far?”
“They opened one relatively nearby.”
“Oh okay,  yeah.” You nod. “I’m game with that.”
“Good. That’s good.”
The drive to the restaurant passes by quickly as you chat about miscellaneous things- the weather, work, different coffee shops. Uncomfortable with silences, you keep the conversation going, jumping from topic to topic, trying to make something stick. However, the driver seems to be content with silence, nodding and giving one-worded answers, only really contributing to the conversation when you give your opinion on something.
Pulling into the restaurant, he takes a glance at you, and you smile in response. He opens his door, and steps out, and you follow close behind. The door is held open for you, you order your own meal, and before you can pat your pockets to find your card, he’s already paying for the meal. You aren’t sure how to feel about the whole situation. You feel good- happy and flustered even- but you can’t kid yourself. It’s dinner. With a scientist who you have pestered for a good while about what exactly is going on within Alchemax. It’s dinner with a guy who you had coffee with- twice. That’s it. 
When he sits in front of you, and smiles, you think you’re about to pass out.
Oh. He’s really cute.
No. Whatever feelings you’re having is a moment of weakness. Maybe you should download a dating app or something. 
Your newfound emotions aren’t settled by the end of the meal where you tell him a story about an old job that you used to work. He’s an avid listener, expressive and laughing when you start to smile uncontrollably. He pushes his tray closer to yours, letting you snag what little left of fries that he has. Even with bags under his eyes, he remains attentive during your story.
“No, and like my supervisor tells me “Well whole milk is regular milk,” and I’m so adamant-” you laugh mid-sentence- “that two percent is regular milk. Or like can be qualified as regular milk.”
“Why were you so adamant about it?” He laughs softly, leaning forward.
“Honestly?” You lean forward, stealing a fry of his and plopping it in your mouth. “I just really hate being wrong. Anyways-” you wave your hand in the air- “we have this whole spiel about milk of all things. And I tell him that I like oat milk and he’s like-” you deepen your voice to portray your supervisor- “‘Oat milk isn’t even milk. How do you even milk an oat?’”
“How do you milk an oat?” He asks with knitted brows.
“I-” you pause and tap at the table. “I always thought you blended it. You know, like peanut butter?”
“Yeah, but people don’t drink peanut butter.”
“I bet you that there is at least one person in the world who does drink peanut butter.”
“Okay, you find me that person and I’ll buy you a coffee next time.”
“Yeah, yeah-” you wave your hand, trying not to let your competitive side leak out. “Anyways, I’m sure they make almond milk the same way. Blended.” You lift a hand and point with your index, swirling it in the air.
“I’m partial to oat,” he admits.
“I gotta be honest, I think all milk tastes the same,” you whisper out the confession, covering the side of your mouth with one hand.
“Oh, now you’re being difficult,” he says with a roll of his eyes, adjusting his glasses by the leg. 
“I’m not, I swear! It just all tastes the same. Doesn’t stop me from asking for it at the coffee shops.”
“Even if it tastes the same?”
“I like feeling fancy,” you lilt, and he laughs.
“So you’re tricking your mind?” 
“Oh totally.” 
“With the fake milks?”
“Real, regular milk,” you counter. “Soy is fake- I think.”
“Oh, soy is fake, but the others aren’t.” He scoffs. “That’s where you draw the line.”
You laugh, taking the final sip of your drink. “Yeah, obviously.”
He joins your laughter, dipping his head down, and stray hairs fall in front of him. When he lifts his head, his smile is wide and open, and he has such a nice laugh- deep and the type that shakes his body. Pride makes your chest swell and heat burn over your cheeks at making him not only smile, but laugh. Fighting back the urge to move away the tray pieces of hair that have fallen, you clench your hand into a fist, your laughter slowly dying down. 
A quiet moment befalls the two of you, and you both look at each other. You rub the bottom of your shoe over the top of the other, and check the time. With a click of your tongue, you gather your trash onto the tray.
“We should probably get going. It’s close to closing time for them,” you explain, nodding your head back to the register where two workers chat.
“Oh, should we?” Despite questioning you, he follows your example and gathers his own trash.
“As someone who used to work customer service jobs, yeah.” Tossing your trash into the designated area, you stack the tray overhead. “I’m pretty sure that the employees probably hate us by now.”
“Good point.” He holds the door open for you, and you follow him back across the mostly empty parking lot. Inside the car, he waits for the engine to heat, and he turns to you. “I apologize for keeping you so late.”
“No, this was,” you hesitate choosing your words, “fun.” You nod your head and pull your bag up onto your lap. “I had a good time.”
“I’m glad that you did,” he says softly, giving you a final look before he gives his attention to the road. 
-
After a long day, you stand in front of your building, Jonathan joining you. You’ve always been much more comfortable with chatter than you have been with silence, but as you stand with him, you don’t feel as uncomfortable. You might even like the silence if it gives you reason to look at him. You stand on the steps leading to your home, finally looking him in the eye, and you hate the fact that he has such soft brown eyes. 
“Thanks for driving me home. And getting me a drink.” You kick at the ground, scuffing up at the dirt that lays in a thin layer. “And paying for dinner.” A jitteriness falls over you, and you can only twist and grip onto the strap of your bag. “Thanks for all of that Dr.-” he gives you a narrowed look and you quickly correct yourself- “Jonathan.”
“You don’t have to add my title,” he tells you. Beside him, his hand twists at the hem of his shirt. 
“Force of habit,” you say shrugging. Clearing your throat, you start. “Still, thanks. This was nice, Jonathan.” You like his name, and you hate the way that it makes you feel.
He nods, and raises a hand to scratch at the back of his neck. “Well, thank you for accompanying me to dinner. I had a good time.” He says your name delicately, rolling off his tongue, and you never thought that you would want to hear your name repeated over and over.
“No worries,” you answer breathlessly. You can’t think around him. Everything feels as if it’s too much- too hot, too close, too sweet. 
It was one day- two technically- but it was a short amount of time. You wear your heart on your sleeve despite trying so desperately not to. All it took was one day with him, and you think that you might like him. 
Oh, how you wish he was with someone else, then you could give yourself a reason to look away from him. 
With cotton stuffed into your mouth, you don’t trust yourself any further. You think that you should go inside- that maybe you shouldn’t be taking up his time. A part of you wonders when you’ll see him again. Shifting your weight between each foot, you pat your hands on your thighs, drying off the clammy feeling. You wish he would start talking again. Or maybe you should. If you go inside, then this could all be over. You turn your foot, and wave your hand in a goodbye, when he starts to speak.
“Will you be joining another tour group?” There’s a hint of hope that’s weaved into his words. He’s looking at you, and you wonder if you look pretty.
“As much as I enjoyed it, no.” You think you imagine seeing his shoulders slump at your words. “It wasn’t really for me. It was nice, but much more kid-centered.” His glasses are slipping down his nose and you wonder if he’d get upset if you pushed them up. “Will you be going to the café tomorrow?”
“I work tomorrow,” he admits.
“Oh,” you clear your throat, and fighting away the burning feeling that is burning in your chest, you suck in a deep breath. It makes sense to do this now. You have to take a risk. It’s dumb and highly unprofessional, but you need to tell him something. He has to stick around, just for a moment longer, just so you could get whatever pink and sweet is in you, out. “Would-” he word comes out much softer than you would have liked- “Would you want to exchange numbers, maybe?” You hope he says no.
“Really?” He looks so shocked, and so happy. A grin tilts his lips upwards, and like seeing his smile.
Nodding, you rub the flat of your middle finger against your jawline. “Yeah. It would be a better alternative than meeting during lunch on a tour group or a random chance meeting at the café. Only if you’re okay with it.”
“I’m okay with it,” he says eagerly.
You nod eagerly, unable to fend off your smile. “Cool, cool.” You suck in a deep breath, and wait for a moment, before you start to pat your pockets, pulling out your phone and clicking at the ‘New Contact’ section. Holding the phone to him, he grabs the device and places his information. 
Holding the phone tight in your hands, you tap your fingers against the back of the case. “I’ll message you later?”
“I’ll look forward to it.” He lifts his hand and waves at you. You watch his back as he steps into his car.
You can hardly believe that you even made it inside without dropping your keys from excitement and nerves. Behind your door, you clasp your hand over your mouth, pitifully trying to stop the smile that beams across your features. Oh, this isn’t fair. And oh, you can’t wait to message him.
377 notes · View notes
ruershrimo · 26 days
Text
take me back (take me with you) | f. megumi x fem! reader | chapter 6: beginning
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ao3 link for additional author’s notes | playlist | prev | next | m.list
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chapter synopsis:
'“Why else do you think I am the way I am? I may be shy and scatterbrained, or a horrible woman with a muddled sense of morality or what I think should and should not happen, when in reality it’s just what I want to happen. But this is why I’m so resolute, and so stubborn. This is why I love you so fiercely. All mothers are like that to some degree, even if my own would never let me bear witness to it.”
You haven’t told her you love her too in years.'
'And Itadori seems… like a good person. I think it’s good, that… you were able to find a friend like that.”
“It was. He’s a really, really good guy.”
“You love him a lot,” Megumi says.
---
You and Megumi set out to prevent an emergency involving Yuuji and a cursed object. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen. But at least everyone is fine in the end, even if it means you'll have to walk away from almost everything (or maybe it's the other way around).
You're going to be all on your own. Still, now it seems like this will hurt less now.
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word count: ~8k; tws: none for now :)
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17-6-2018 
The two of you walk down the lane. It’s midnight. There’s a loitering silence in the air, no words exchanged between you and him, and it twists your heart in brief moments of hurt when you’re not trying to keep your mind occupied with other things. Your legs move subconsciously without you caring to think of them, the route to the hospital ingrained in your mind as if intrinsically there. 
At some point, you think your hand with its sweat and its grip is going to leave imprints like a marring on his skin, but it’s of your own selfishness that you choose to hold onto his wrist anyway. 
There’s a million things you could say to him right now, things you’ll forcefully push to the very back of your throat, things you’ll keep under lock and key in a mangled mix of quiet anticipation and sombre anxieties. Right now you’re holding his wrist and that’s enough for you, to have him walking behind you if not beside, to be two people near each other— not together— in silence since any conversation is not an option; any conversation could lead to the last spark needed to be fanned into the flame for it to erupt bigger and brighter than ever before. 
If you asked about Tsumiki right now, or why either of them never bothered to speak to you since 2016, it could break you apart, of that you’re sure. And even without words it threatens to do so to you like a chandelier of melting wax candles hanging above you being suspended precariously from the ceiling or light lightning soon to be thrown down mercilessly from the sky. 
“The turning to Sendai Hospital is on the right.” 
“I know the routes better,” you let out, and rather disappointingly it sounds brasher and more derogatory aloud instead of the unobtrusive tone you were aiming for— you hope it doesn’t hurt him but then wonder why you still even cared that much about how he felt about what you said or did anyway, “I got myself accustomed to taking the one on the left that leads you through. Quick shortcut and all.” 
You’re not looking back, but the light pull of his hand from the hold of your wrist seems to suggest his slight reeling back in a small sense of surprise and an equal amount of shock, as if suddenly remembering the fact you were your own person, that you had your own autonomy as one, because somehow everyone thought you weren’t. 
It’s strange to look back at how you were before: meek, timid. Too shy to speak up. Too innocent to be angered by anything. Always dreaming, mind bleary as if on a cloud in blurred skies, hiding behind the backs of others like a petrified forest critter. 
And now you’re this— this person who frowns and disagrees and retorts at every little thing, and as much as you have to, as much as it was nearly inevitable the way you turned out, all you can think you share with the person you were when you first met Megumi and Tsumiki was your need to be useful— and even that has been exacerbated by how you’ve grown, how you’ve become this person you grew into. And a part of you— no, just you as a whole— doesn’t like yourself at all. 
Your father was right. That little girl was hopeful, obedient, kind, caring— you don’t know why even then you were dissatisfied with the way you were, or why your dissatisfaction would matter because at that time you’d cared so little about everything besides caring for people and having fun with the pair of siblings that you were so rarely bothered by it, that it was still just a slight whisper from the back of your head that could be shushed or tuned out with library visits and nights in front of the TV and the glow of old cartoons. Your father was right and this is proved even more by the fact that the whole situation just infuriates you on the surface, and just makes you feel like an empty, hollow shell left behind when you reach deeper into yourself. 
That little girl had potential, potential to be useful but kind, obedient and close to the people who raised her even if it meant abandoning her own ideals. But you’d been so devoted to them, you think, that she was killed and destroyed in the world she grew up in, and now there’s a space for her that’s left vacant due to the way she wasted away. You miss her, the girl you once were, you miss being her, how easy and lighthearted everything was and how all of you felt so content in every sense of the word. But you don’t want her back. Now that’s just what makes you miserable sometimes. 
Self-reflection just made you feel revolted by yourself. You keep your eyes on the road. 
“It’s here,” you state, pointing at the building in front of you. 
Sendai General Hospital is an institution made out of bare concrete. Its walls are yellowed and close in on its wards like a prison, coloured using old paint that hasn’t been repainted over and is as pallid-looking as the skin of the people sitting on the beds it is inhabited by. Just being in it feels like a hit to the body and the brain and the senses, too. There are old-fashioned tiles on its floors, their pale beige hue muted yet the blinding shine on them harshly mopped clean. Inside it reeks of an imminent presence of sickness or death or illnesses and conditions never to be able to be defeated and sterile sanitisers. Looking at the latex-blue curtains in it feels like a blindfold unwantedly, forcefully pulled over both your vision and your ears. 
“You and that Itadori seem close.” 
“We are,” you say, then you add, not really knowing why, “He’s my best friend.” Maybe you’re trying to make him jealous, rile him up a bit. But even then you wouldn’t want him to be riled up, nor would you be satisfied if he were to keep silent. Maybe you just wanted to hurt him, to hurt him back or something, if only for something small, even if you’d already resolved not to do so. 
You’ll make sure not to do that again, though. 
Instead he does something else, takes another route instead. “Then it seems you visit his grandfather often.” 
“Uh-huh,” you nod as the two of you enter the hospital, and you have to blink a few times as always in order to adjust yourself to the light and how it reflects off the detachedly clean floor. “My mother’s here, too.” 
“Oh, I’m sorry— is she alright?” 
“She’s okay, I… think. She… she got sick a while back and stays here now,” you explain, “Let’s not talk about that…—I mean, I… don’t really want to.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
“You don’t have to keep saying that.” It just makes people feel worse. 
He doesn’t push further and you suppose that’s okay. Your chest hurts a bit, like phantom pain on a wound that’s still there. There’s not really a way to explain it but almost everything makes you feel that way these days. Everything makes you feel horrible to some degree. Maybe it’s being a girl, maybe it’s being a teenager, but it’s not quite either, you guess. 
“He won’t be here for a while,” you say, “He’s either still in the room where his grandfather is or he’s buying flowers for him.” 
“Then I’ll just contact them and let them know the whole situation first.” 
Who’s ‘them’? 
“Okay.” You turn your back on him, “—wait.” 
“What?” 
“Do you have any emergency contact or something? Like, a trusted adult who could help you with any of this? In case things go really bad?” 
“...why would you need one?” he questions. 
You roll your eyes, “Just give it to me, damn it… if there’s anything I have nowadays, it’s probably foresight for stuff like this. For emergencies.” 
He gives you the number, albeit a bit begrudgingly. Why’d he have to be so pissy about anything and everything? 
“Okay, thanks. I’m going to visit my mother now.” 
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The air and the colour from it seems distant as always, the ward she was basically imprisoned in smelling of the indistinguishable mix of sanitiser and sickness. There her body chains her to her bed, and there is little she can do besides rely on and weakly cling to the nurses who assist her, a frail shadow of what she once was. 
“Hi, Mummy.” 
She turns to you, and your chest constricts. Her hair, once much longer, the type that you dreamed to have as it billowed in the wind, the type that invited you caressively to bury yourself in and take in that heady scent of roses that emanated from it— that hair is now replaced with a cloth wrapped around her head. Radiation. Chemotherapy. 
The wrinkles on her face make the difference between her now and her years ago all the more stark. Every visit you come back here, you’ve forced yourself to be acclimated to this new reality, one where she isn’t waiting at home no matter how tedious the fights get or how exhausting it was eating with someone who remained silent, someone who chose to continue suffering if it meant she could hurt and turn her daughter to guilt (as if that would change anything). At least she was there. 
Cancer is a terminal illness, especially the type your mother is facing— regardless of how much chemotherapy she would struggle through and how much you didn’t want to acknowledge a truth so plain and conspicuously bare, she would be confined to this bed until her final days, her illness like gyves tying her limbs and forcing her earthbound; the bed a cage she could never be liberated from. 
Sometimes she made it a point to you that she didn’t want to liberate herself from it anyway, and you’d never been so depressed yet irked by anything else. (You’d regret everything— not spending time with her, not appreciating her nearly enough— except for your decision to be involved in the Jujutsu world, if not as a sorcerer then as a doctor. That was, and is— your ultimatum. Your end all be all of this whole situation.” 
“Hello. Where’s that Itadori boy?” 
“Not here today, he’s still with his grandfather— maybe later.” You swing your bag over your shoulder, rummaging through it a while before pulling it out. “I’ve something for you, by the way.” 
“Oh! These,” she exclaims, and she smiles faintly, bits of colour rushing back to her face like watercolour dots on moistened paper. “I used to make them for you, sometimes. They used to be your favourite when you were really little.” 
“I know,” you explain, “That’s why I made them. I don’t like them anymore, but… I can’t remember your favourite food or if I ever asked, and I know you don’t like the food they give you here as much as… I don’t know. Your own cooking, I guess.” 
“It’s not my favourite,” she states, matter-of-factly, bluntly, “But thank you for the effort. My favourite will always be my own mother’s cooking.” 
Silence. 
“Now that I look back at everything, there are so many things I regret. Things I should have done but never did out of fear; things I should not have done and never apologised for out of pride. I’d like it if you could be different. Your grandmother went out the same way. At least, even if you had the same illnesses as we did, which I hope the genes for which have been curbed by your father’s— at least you would not leave the world with regret,” she looks down at her hands, staring down at them solemnly like a shadow, an excluded figure. “But it was a good life.” 
“...then maybe you can tell me more. While you— while we still have time. What was your childhood like? What was your mother like?” It feels strange, imposturous, maybe— to be referring to someone basically a stranger as “grandmother”, to name someone so far away from you so intimate, even if the only generation between you, tying the two of you together, was your mother’s. If you had a daughter it would be the same for her, most likely. There’s a part of you that would find honour in becoming your mother once you’d grown, but there’s a part of you that would think being such would accost you horribly, for all time. 
She sighs, “I’ll tell you later. There would be so much to say, like compressing all my words into one tiny paper. The stories have weight in them the same way letters and words in handwriting can be firm and large. But if I were to start,” she begins, “I’ll say that I was born as the daughter of two very powerful sorcerers. Now, I know how much this would sound like some nonsense spouted by your mother, but I think you should listen anyway. 
“My parents loved each other a lot, but my mother had come from an obscure clan whose name I can’t remember, but who had high hopes in them having a child with a powerful cursed technique as their last resort, since, if I recall correctly, there had been a crisis within the clan for it to keep surviving. 
“I still remember when they found out I had no cursed technique and how terrified they were. In me I had a bit more than the relatively normal amount of cursed energy most people have, and so I was expected to have techniques as powerful as they did. They loved me and treated me preciously, like a fragile object, so long as I was quiet and demure— and I guess to some extent I still was and still am today. They wondered what they could do to run from the clan, as if they didn’t have enough power when they were supposed to protect me despite my father’s bullheaded industry and my mother’s patience-formed strength. They lacked grit to grapple against them, and only in this did they lack it, I think; only against my mother’s family did they not have the ability to resolve things whether peacefully or violently. And eventually they just gave up and thought they would just… surrender me over when I entered my adolescent years. I was their daughter. I… suppose they didn’t love me enough. I know it sounds awful— thinking that they should have always protected me, through and through—” 
“No, it wasn’t.” 
“—when it could have been the clan itself that would have been mostly to blame.” 
“But they were still supposed to protect you! They were your parents—” 
“Why else do you think I am the way I am? I may be a shy and scatterbrained or a horrible woman with a muddled sense of morality or what I think should and should not happen when in reality it’s just what I want to happen, but this is why I’m so resolute, and so stubborn. This is why I love you so fiercely. All mothers are like that to some degree, even if my own would never let me bear witness to it.” You haven’t told her you love her too in years. 
“But then when I was an adult I met your father, who was a bit like a country bumpkin, but a formidable sorcerer and a kind, honest person, and I couldn’t help but fall in love with the person he was both inside and out. And for the next few years we struggled to have a child until I found out I was pregnant with you,” she continues, “Even though by that time I was well into my late thirties, we were overjoyed and decided to keep you.” 
Suddenly you wish there had been more time before things were ruined. Time for you to know her better, the beginning of your existence. You would have begged her for old photos, stories, mementos of her and your father. 
“And now the clan’s faded into obscurity, finally. The younger members left and the older ones passed away peacefully. Happy story, right?” 
“...yeah.” It all ended well, but you don’t know if you can say the same for your mother’s. At least, you hope, when she goes away, it can be swift and peaceful like the way her relatives did. 
Then suddenly there’s a buzz in your pocket. An inconvenient one, out of the blue. 
“You should go get that first,” she says. 
“...okay.” 
You lift it up to your face and feel like crushing the damn thing. Old number. Stupid number. Number you haven’t called in months because you’d given up on that bastard— oh. The two of you were working together now. 
You turn away from your mother, creeping to the edge of the room. “What’s wrong?” 
“I just talked to him, but I think it would be easier if you came back and was there with him too since you know him better than I do. And he… doesn’t seem like the brightest. He may think that it’s not important enough to hand over unless you ask him to or something.” 
You muffle your voice with your hand and whisper, “Hey, you shut up, you know nothing about him. He’s way smarter than people give him credit for. But I’m— I’m with my mother right now. Wait for a second. Just ask him to wait for me first; he wouldn’t need any of my help for all of this yet. Make a friend or get a life or something.” 
“...fine. But you’ll have to join us later. He’s bound to ask about you.” 
“Then just tell him I’m with my mother!” you snap, still whispering. 
“I’ll see what I can do.” 
“Wh— you little— oh, don’t you hang up now—” 
Weird thing is, he probably wasn’t even being so infuriating on purpose. And you wouldn’t have burst out at someone for being that way anyway. It was only because it was him, specifically. 
You’d sworn to put that past you. 
Your immaturity strikes once again. 
“If you have to go now,” your mother says, “You should. Just come back again next time. I can tell you the rest. Thank you again for the food, [Name].” She doesn’t call you ‘darling’ anymore, doesn’t she? Just your name. 
“Okay. Sorry.” 
You swing the bag back over your shoulder, wearing it this time instead of taking it off, easing your way out of the room. 
“It’s okay,” she assures you, “Goodbye. I love you.” 
“...I love you, too,” you say, but it’ll mingle with all the other sounds in the hospital, and it’ll be drowned out like a ship in the middle of nowhere, your voice soft and thoroughly soused by the cacophony of bleak noises like telephone rings and beeps from electrocardiographs outside of her deafeningly quiet hospital room. 
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“Hi, Yuuji,” you greet them in the dimly lit waiting area, “...and Megumi. Sorry to keep the two of you guys waiting for so long.” 
“Oh, hey; it’s okay!” he goes, although in his voice it seems that there’s been some of his usual energy seeping away from him. “Didn’t know the two of you knew each other until just now or that you were a part of some magic curse society. Are you guys childhood friends who met because of all that cursed stuff or something?” 
“Something like that,” Megumi explains. 
“It’s a long story,” you say, not exactly denying him nor conceding his words anyway. Once again, there’s a trace of anger despite your promise to be untethered to your puerility like this. “Anyway, are you okay, Yuuji? How’s your grandfather?” 
He pauses. “Oh, about that… he just passed away.” 
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Yuuji…” you hold the fabric of his jacket (sometimes it still feels wrong to try and hold his hand— it just makes your heart ache again like a scab being clawed at) and pull him into a brief caress, patting his back as gently as you can manage. 
“It’s okay, I’ll be fine,” he smiles as you pull yourself away, “Grandpa wouldn’t want me to be crying right now anyway. So don’t worry.” 
“Okay, I won’t. But if you’re sad, just know you can always talk to me.” 
He laughs, softer than the boisterous manner he usually does so in, “Yeah, I know.” 
Megumi clears his throat, pointedly trying to make a sound, “Anyway. Itadori Yuuji—” 
“Just call him Itadori. You don’t have to be so uptight.” 
“Nah, [Name], I’m fine—” 
Megumi sighs. “Anyway, we need you to give the cursed object now.” 
“Oh, yeah, that,” you start, “So, Yuuji, do you have the thing that Megumi would have explained to you? The cursed object? We need it for everyone to be safe, and all.” 
“Yeah! Hold on, let me get it. I told you I didn’t have it already, but here’s the box,” he says, tossing it over to Megumi. 
He retrieves the box. It’s ancient and wooden, the craftsmanship behind it elite and adroit, and the paper on it has the words for a buddhist sutra written on it like an inscription. You’ve heard of it before, the kind of curse it was meant to seal, but it definitely couldn’t be— 
He opens the box. 
Holy shit. 
“Where is it?” 
“It’s empty…” Megumi panics, “Wait— hold on!” 
Things are bad— as in, they couldn’t get any worse— not only was the school doomed by the loss of its cursed object, the cursed object was Sukuna Ryomen’s finger itself. 
You blame your inadequacy, your inability to have stopped everything sooner— if not for that nobody would have gotten hurt. If not for that there wouldn’t even be a risk of anything happening anyway. You should’ve tried harder to sense it, and you should’ve focused more on it to keep the student body safe and sound. 
It was your fault. No one else was to blame but your useless self, and even if that were wrong, you’d still have the most to be blamed for. 
Megumi has a hand on Yuuji’s shoulder, keeping the other boy from moving, his breathing erratic and his eyes wide in frantic shock. 
“...well, they were saying, ‘let’s open it up to see what’s inside it tonight’,” Yuuji clarifies, standing a few centimetres away from the door, “Why? Is that bad?” 
Sasaki and Iguchi? 
The air in the hospital feels particularly chilly tonight, gooseflesh terrorising your skin all over, and for all the kinds of reasons that would cause anything like such. 
“It’s way worse than bad,” Megumi declared, fear and grim so thick in his voice they were tangible enough to be cut through with a knife. “Your friends are going to die.” 
“We’ve got to go,” you rush, “Now! Quick!” 
It passes by like a blur, as if you’re in that moment and out of it simultaneously. Your mind has been bombarded with and pressed so thoroughly onto the moment, like tissue on a wet surface, that it seems it’s being blanked out, while your legs continue to run despite your mind nearly forgetting, at this point, why you’re running— as if your legs moving so frantically to help them was something intrinsic, something you didn’t need your mind for. 
Sasaki and Iguchi are in danger. Sasaki and Iguchi are in danger. 
You didn’t know them all too well, really— just through Yuuji, and Yuuji himself wasn’t as close to the two of them, being their junior and all. And although a part of you was doing this just because you could, like the way you did when you first discovered your cursed technique, you knew that another was doing this for Yuuji. If in any way they were hurt or could not survive, he would blame himself to no end. He possessed such a kindness within him, so much that it hit the depths of your soul sometimes; shattered your heart so gently a million times over or heated it in the kindly way mothers heated pans on stoves despite the heat of it being greater than that of blue flame. If anything happened to them, no matter how much or how little he knew of them, he wouldn’t be able to live after that. 
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The two of them are near the barrier separating the school from the street before you (you struggle with catching up to them— one’s a star athlete and another has been training for much longer than you, you’re sure), the gates tall and enveloped in darkness. You didn’t think much of school except for when it came to your grades and being with Yuuji, thinking of these gates— the ones that you and Yuuji use when you’re running super late— in particular as just a shortcut entrance you paid little attention to, just something treated with indifference as you passed through them whenever you were late. Yet now they echoed denial, refusal, and slim chances— it was unlikely that they’d be alright, especially since this cursed object in particular was the finger of Sukuna Ryomen. 
“Is that the building?” Megumi questions, “Where are they?” 
“Fourth floor— guh!” Yuuji seems to come to an abrupt halt, nearly slamming into what seems to be an invisible wall. A veil. 
“Yuuji!” 
“I’ll handle this,” Megumi declares, hopping onto the metal wires, more directed to Yuuji than you. So even he can tell how selfless Yuuji is, even after only having just met him. 
“I may not know those two that well, but—” Yuuji starts, “But they’re friends! I have to help!” 
“You’re staying here,” Megumi commands, “[Name], if you could— get your father or any sorcerers you know to come here and help.” 
He climbs over the gate. 
He’s going away from you again. Slipping away from your grasp. And now, all you can do is watch. There’s nothing else— nothing else you can do, at all. If you went inside now, you wouldn’t be able to help except— what?— tend to their injuries? Manipulate your own cells into weapons? The former wasn’t possible with how much you’d strained yourself from running so quickly earlier, and the latter was too dangerous: you hadn’t even started with the basics of that yet, on your father’s obstinate insistence that even if he’d let you play doctor he wouldn’t let you manipulate any of the cells in your body into any kind of usable weapon. Any simple wrong move could make things turn south in the most drastically terrifying of ways. If you went in there, you’d just die, and there’d be more casualties, more trouble, more problems caused by you and you alone. 
You can’t even call your father, either. That would always be your last resort— because even if you fought, you still needed him to rest. You didn’t want him overexerting himself by using his cursed technique at all. 
(You were selfish. You didn’t want to lose your father. You didn’t want to have to visit not one but two parents lying sick and tired and grey in matching hospital beds.) 
“Yuuji?” you start, turning to him. “You’re…deathly quiet. Are you okay?” 
His lips quiver slightly, a faint whimpering noise coming out of him. Is he crying? 
“Yuuji, look at me. Are you okay?” you ask, as gently and softly as you can right now, despite your ragged, unsteady, unathletic-addled breaths. You place a hand on his shoulder, slowly rubbing up and down from his shoulder and crook of his neck to his back. “It’s okay. …Megumi’s a good and… capable, strong person and jujutsu sorcerer. He’ll be okay, and they’ll be okay too. Just… just put your trust in him, okay?” 
“I’m sorry, [Name], but I’ve got to go,” he tells you, “You stay here, and call for help or something. I’m sorry, but I’ve just really got to do it!” 
He hugs you, quickly, deftly. And then he crosses the gate, leaving you all alone like Megumi did. You wish he’d hug you longer, that you could take care of him for a little longer— it was your last way to be useful now. 
Still, there’s someone you could call, now that you remember him.
The emergency contact. 
You snatch your phone out, resolute. 
“Hello! Gojo Satoru speaking,” the voice on the other line says. 
You’ve heard it plenty before by accident. 
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When Gojo and Megumi are back, Yuuji’s in the form of a figure slung over Gojo’s shoulders like he’s been reply entrenched into slumber, his body seemingly limp and his torso completely bare. There’s barely an ounce of movement in him, except for slow exhales and inhales you can see on his chest. Sasaki and Iguchi are both nearly the same, the former covered in bruises and in a deep, panicked haze, and the latter as asleep as Yuuji seemed to be while harbouring injuries he may never recover from. 
The only non-roughed up one here is Gojo, it seems; Megumi has a stream of blood running from the top of his head in rivulets, staining his sweaty, scraped forehead. 
“Wh— you two, what happened? Why are they all asleep? What happened to Yuuji? Are they okay? What—” 
“Calm down, kid,” Gojo says, “They’ll be fine. I mean, there’s a 100% chance that your friend can be executed, but…” 
“Executed?” you almost scream, “What the hell happened? You said things would be okay!” 
“Uh-uh, again, calm down. I mean, we don’t even know when they’re gonna make him kick the bucket! He ate Sukuna’s finger, by the way.” He holds his arms up in faux surrender. 
“Gojo you ignorant slut! Don’t you fucking dare tell me to ‘calm down!’ He ate Sukuna’s finger? Why weren’t you able to stop anything? What’s going to happen to him now? You know what— give him to me!” 
“You know, it’s not like I’m scared of being hunted down by your father if you use your cursed technique— I mean, I’m leagues stronger than him— but the stuff was too strong. It’s not like you’ll be able to get rid of the finger in your little boyfriend.” 
“He’s not her boyfriend!” Megumi interjects.
“Thank you, Megumi!” Your face is going hot like a campfire fanned by the wind. 
“Oh?” Gojo adds, a teasing lilt in his voice. “Anyway, we’re going to get him to a place where we can cover everything with talismans to surround him.” 
They’re going to execute him at Jujutsu High after.  
“I’m coming with you.” 
“You sure?” Gojo asks, “Your father isn’t going to like you travelling so far away without telling him.” 
Megumi shifts, a little sombre. “[Name], you don’t have to.” 
“...I’m doing this for Yuuji, not for you.” 
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“You okay?” Gojo asks while the three of you are back in the hospital. (You hate this building so much.) Iguchi’s been transferred to a ward, Sasaki having woken up and insisting on staying with him. “I’ve got kikufuku if you want some. You must be really tired since it’s so late, huh?” 
The whole situation is so incredulous you’re unsure of whether you want to burst out laughing or dismember someone. 
“...nothing. Wait, let me see Yuuji again.” 
Everyone is asleep, it seems— all except for you and Gojo. Yuuji’s been knocked out, and Megumi’s stuck in the world of his dreams. 
You can’t sleep. There’s just nothing to put your mind at rest. 
At least if there’s one thing you can do it’s this. 
Gojo picks him up by the sides of his torso (now temporarily clothed with a spare white shirt) like a child with a heavy book. “Woah— he’s pretty heavy for a fifteen year old kid.” 
You lay Yuuji face-up on the line of hospital chairs. There are thin scarlet marks right under his eyes— Sukuna’s eyelids, you’ve been told. 
You should’ve done more to protect him. 
Slowly, reticently, you kneel by the side of the chairs. You press your fingertips onto that pair of thin tiny lines. 
Nothing happens. You can’t picture his cells being able to grow back. It’s as if there’s been a slit on his face and its outline has been replaced with brand-new skin. His cells don’t budge. 
“Why don’t you help Megumi? I bet he’s got plenty of healable injuries.” 
“…I don’t think I’ll be able to help much. I could faint if I try helping him now. It’s better to leave it to Dr Ieiri or something.” 
“Pft,” he scoffs, “Shoko? She’s definitely not going to heal all of him. It’ll just be a waste of her time. You can just help him with the tiny scrapes and bruises first. And I’ll even tell her that you did it. She’s really fond of you, you know.” 
You give him a shy, modest smile. “Thanks, then.”
It’s time to get to work. 
Megumi’s skin is smooth like a baby’s just like the last time you felt it, though the frown on his face, ever-present, is bound to cause wrinkles there in less than a few decades’ time. You place your hands on him, bruised and bloody, watching in your mind and directing his cells as they work. 
Once the smaller injuries have been dealt with, you stop. “I can’t really work on the one on his head, since then you’d get another fainted person to carry around, but he should be fine with some bandages and patching-up there, because I’ve already kind of catalysed the start of that area’s healing process a little. Other than that, he should be completely fine. I’ll give it, say… two weeks or so for it to get better completely.” 
“Good work!” he smiles, the outline of his cheeks visible on his blindfold. 
“By the way, Mr Gojo…” 
“You know, I appreciate the respect you’re giving me now, but just Gojo is fine.” 
“Okay, Gojo. Do you think Yuuji will be okay?” 
“I mean, I’m pretty sure. And I’m going to ask them to suspend his sentence. I’ll just see whether he wants that or not once he wakes up.” 
“That’s the thing. I’m not sure if he even will.” 
Gojo laughs. “Don’t worry. He was really strong, and able to switch between being possessed by Sukuna and being himself at will. We haven't seen that kind of talent in a millennia! I’m sure they’ll listen to me, anyway.” 
“Thank you,” you sigh. Thank goodness. “If you need any type of payment, um… teleport to my house whenever you get inconvenient little cuts like bruises and stuff. I can help.” 
“Nah, reverse cursed technique’s got me covered.” 
“Oh, wait— I forgot about that— um… I can…”
“Just leave it to me! No payment required,” he exclaims, holding both thumbs up. “And for the record, the one who wanted to save Yuuji was actually Megumi.” 
You wouldn’t have imagined that would happen. Megumi— pragmatic, serious, unkind when he needs to be (no matter how kind of a person he actually is— no, was— at heart), different from Tsumiki in so many ways. There was no way he would have been the one vouching for Yuuji, someone he’d only just met, to be spared. 
“Really?” you ask, “I… wouldn’t have thought he was the one who would do it. I thought, maybe, you were just… really kind tonight or something…”
“Well, maybe it was because he saw how much you cared about Itadori and did it for you, or maybe he had met Itadori, liked him, and just wanted to save a good person,” Gojo suspects, “But if there’s one thing for sure it’s that your old friend saved your new one.” 
“...oh.” 
You’ll have to bring it up with him next time— maybe, if he’s still there tomorrow…
“I know you’re mad at him, but a lot has happened,” Gojo states, voice lower, softer like a schoolteacher’s, “Still, I won’t tell you that you have to give him a chance or any of that. If you don’t want to, you don’t have to thank him or anything. I’m sure he did it out of his own volition without expecting anything from you. He knew he probably didn’t deserve to if it were you.” 
You pause. “No, it’s just… I’ll talk to him again the next time I see him. Alone, most likely. And I can figure something out. I think that would be the best way to go around things. Thank you, Gojo.” 
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18-6-2018 
The aftershocks are still there, although you’ve come out unscathed. 
Last night was a mingled mess, a blur. You’d tried your best to help Iguchi by the time Yuuji was placed in the room of talismans and you could come back to the hospital and visit, but in the end he still needed better help than that. His injuries were too large of scale for how you were at that moment, already tired after healing some of the numbers done on Megumi. 
(You were useless. You couldn’t help anyone. You couldn’t prevent Yuuji from being hit with such soul-striking guilt., couldn’t help Sasaki from being traumatised, couldn’t help Iguchi enough for him to be back at school soon—) 
Sasaki’s injuries were limited to bruises and scrapes, but though you could help her physically, there was nothing you could do to assist her emotionally. 
You stayed with them for a few hours in the ICU and then one of the hospital wards (a floor under your mother’s), your father calling you once the sun had risen. 
“Gojo Satoru told me about everything that happened.” 
“Yeah. I know you’ll scold me, but… not now. I’m sorry, I’m just really tired.” You hang up. 
For all you spoke of wanting to be useful, the night when your powers were needed the most was when you were at your most useless— you couldn’t help them, you couldn’t help attack the cursed spirits, and the only thing you could do was call for an adult’s help like a little, scared and helpless girl. 
You needed to train, and train harder than you had been doing for the past few years. 
There’s a knock on the door, a dot-dot-dot-dot-dot. dot dot. It’s Yuuji, you know it is. How ever could you not? 
Timidly, movements quiet like the room itself, you pull the door knob, seeing him there, relatively unscathed. You sigh in relief, a moment’s respite before you return to the panic you had been living in before since you deserve the respite less than other people do— no, you don’t deserve such a break at all, you’re absolutely sure of that, not after what you pulled, how horribly and utterly useless you were, you’ll remind yourself of that again and again and again— the heart-piercing guilt and the worry and the constant need to care for the people around you, almost like a mother, maybe, but you don’t like that thought as much as you think you should. Maybe if your own mother knew, she’d disagree— maybe she’d tell you that you should be a mother, maybe she’d ignore that you were also a child at certain times— the most convenient ones, probably. When she thinks it good that you, a child, were someone’s caretaker because women should take pride in and appreciate that, she would encourage you to be one; when she thinks it bad that as a caretaker and a so-called ‘adult’ you can have your own autonomy, agency and opinions, then maybe she’d remind you that in her eyes you knew nothing of the world. But maybe, just maybe, there was also a chance that she wouldn’t be like that in any way. 
But you wouldn’t put it past her. 
“Yuuji, are you okay?” There are questions about to spill out of you, tears about to fall like gushing rivers, but you’re just happy he’s alive at this point. 
“Yeah.” His voice is soft. Your chest twinges; it hurts like an awful, intransigent little bruise. “Hi, [Name].” It feels so unignorable, the way it’s filled with such sorrow and worry that it weighs his usually loud and boisterous voice down. 
“I thought that—” you start, lips trembling, “I thought there was a chance I couldn’t lose you. The only thing I could do was—” you sniffle, “Hope that they could delay it or something.” 
“Yeah. I’ll explain it later,” he says, his voice sincere. 
You squeeze the wrist of his sleeve. “Don’t do things like that ever again,” you plead, “Promise me that at least.” 
“I promise.” 
“And keep your promises.”
“I will.” 
“...want to come inside?” 
He walks inside, and you step back to make way for him. 
“Sorry I came so late,” he says to you and Sasaki, who shakes her head in reassurance. “Hello, Sasaki,” he greets, “Is Iguchi okay?” 
They speak for a while— you don’t feel like it’s much of your right to join their conversation, since you did nearly nothing at all when they were most in danger, so you leave them be for a while. It would be better not to bother them right now, anyway. They’ve both been traumatised until it reached beneath their bones within the past twenty-four hours. 
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When you leave the hospital, Sasaki tells you that she’s going to stay. You tell her to take care, squeezing her hand one final time. 
You let her, patting her on the back. You’ll call them later— she’d given you her contact— just to check on the two of them. 
“Where’s Megumi?” you ask Yuuji. 
“Oh, Fushiguro? I’m not too sure, but that Gojo guy said he’ll be there soon.” 
“Where, though?”
Sheepishly, in peak Yuuji fashion, he scratches the back of his neck. “Actually, another reason why I came here was also because… I mean, I know you and him weren’t close, but I’m going to the place where they’ll keep Grandpa’s ashes, and I think… you know, you could come with me. I… I don’t think I’d be able to do it really well alone, even though he had definitely made it clear he seriously didn’t want me moping around after his death and all. Gojo and Megumi will probably be there, but I thought it would be better if you were there because I know you better than those two, and you’re my friend. So… could you come with me? I know that he never really showed it, but I think he had always liked you a lot. Like, he was happy we were friends and stuff.” 
“...mhm. I’ll always be happy about that,” you tell him, before pulling him into a hug. The guy must need one right now. You’ve never hugged him before. Your heart hurts. 
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The air is hot and humid with the breath of summer, bundles of mosquitoes bound to be breeding new ones these next few weeks. Up in the sky is the sun, bold and bright, glaring down harshly at the two of you. 
“Before he passed away, Grandpa actually said something. He… kind of cursed me, if I’m being honest,” Yuuji starts. “He said I was a strong kid, so I should help people. And I’m going to do that. So that was why when Gojo asked if I wanted to be executed immediately or just eat all the fingers before dying, I chose the second option. I… I think I want to help people that way.” 
‘You’ve already helped people enough. You helped me,’ you almost tell him. 
You frown, because that’s the only thing you can do right now. You search for words to say the same way you do looking for dog books in libraries chock-full with those of other genres. “I’m… disappointed, I— I know I should be grateful, grateful that you’re still going to be alive and all, but… you’re still going to be in danger, and you’re still going to be executed one day. I mean, again, I know I should be happy you’re going to have more time alive and that I can still see you, but what if things don’t go as planned? What if you lose control of yourself once you reach, like, the fifth finger or something?” 
You’re selfish like that. In a way, you’re just the way your mother is. You should’ve always known— you were her beloved daughter after all, and the people you know would be loved the same way she did you since the day she knew of your existence, and maybe even before that. 
“Don’t worry,” he grins, wide as always. Even in an over-enveloping darkness he still manages to be the light. “I’ll be just fine. I’m a strong kid, after all. And we’ll always be friends!” 
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Gojo asks if he and Yuuji can talk in private for a while. You wonder if this was how your mother felt as she had to give the person she loved most away (but you will have to go away, one day), because you can briefly tell what Gojo is going to ask. You wonder if she felt this twice. 
Yuuji can’t stay with you forever. In the same way you can’t remain by your mother and father’s sides for all eternity. 
This won’t be the last time you’re here, you think. For a place of death, it’s quite a bit beautiful how there’s such large masses of grass and plants surrounding it. 
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Megumi nearly walks past you, his eyes on the old photographs of the deceased all around him. 
“Megumi.” 
He turns around. 
“I just wanted to thank you for wanting to save my friend, even if you may not have wanted to do it for me, specifically… um… I didn’t expect that you’d still be here. Are your injuries okay?” 
“I’m okay,” he answers you. “And also, I…” he hesitates, the first time he’s talked to you for something actually related to the two of you in a long time— nearly two years if you’re counting correctly, but the thoughts in your head are a bit too jumbled to count at the moment. “I didn’t really do it for you, though. It… it was for Tsumiki.” 
“Oh.”
“Wait! I’m sorry, that didn’t… come out right. But I should also apologise for something else. You wouldn’t have been thrown into this world anyway if not for my own demon dogs years ago.” 
“No, no, it wasn’t your fault. And I would have wanted to be in it anyway. There’s not many who can heal other people and all, so I just thought… even if I can’t do as much yet, since I don’t have reversed cursed technique and the drawbacks that come from mine are really bad, I can still help people sometimes if they’re dealing with relatively minor injuries. I can, um… make things easier for people. I can be useful like that. I’d keep to it anyway, because I’m stubborn, but… yeah. It wasn’t your fault, really.” 
“Okay. That’s good to hear.” 
“Yeah. Anyway, I’m happy to know that Tsumiki is okay.” 
Silence again for a while. The air turns a little more sombre, and a lot more awkward. 
“She is. And Itadori seems… like a good person. I think it’s good, that… you were able to find a friend like that.” 
“It was. He’s a really, really good guy.” 
“You love him a lot,” Megumi says. 
“I do. He’s a really good friend. If there’s something I’ll always know I know that, at least.” 
“I can see that. It doesn’t seem like he loves you back in the same way, though.” 
“...wow. Way to be blunt, Megumi. And yes, I do know that, too.” 
“Let’s just… change the subject.” 
“You’re the one who introduced it in the first place.” 
“Okay. How… how are you?” 
“I’m good. Wait, I think you should… go back to them. Maybe they’ll need you there right about now. He’s probably going to have to go to Jujutsu High, right?” 
He pauses. “Yeah. I’m sorry, [Name].” 
“No, no. That’s okay. I expected it. It’s just that I’ll miss him a lot,” you tell him, “He took care of me, kind of. You know I’ve always been a bit of an awkward or shy person, but he still approached me since I was new and we ended up hitting off as friends, kind of. We did a lot of stuff together.” 
Sounds pretty familiar, huh. 
“If you want I can make sure he’s safe for you.” 
“...you should be able to do that regardless of whether it’s my wish for you to do so or not…” you state, “But that would help, I guess. And I’m sorry for my attitude towards you for the past few hours or so. Thank you again.” 
“...I’m sorry I never spoke to you for so long, by the way,” he says abruptly. ‘By the way’? Classic Megumi… 
“I could tell you were. It’s… it’s okay. The two of you kind of have a habit of doing that.” 
All your rage, your loneliness, your feelings of abandonment— and this is all you can do. This is all you can say. You can only just let it go, in the end. 
“I’ll explain it all one day.” 
“You don’t have to if it’s hard.” 
He stays. “No, I will. I promise. And I promise I’ll start to talk to you again, as well. I was just… scared of a few things, maybe.” 
“That’s okay.” 
The two of you aren’t quite friends again yet, but it’ll happen soon. Maybe. And even if it doesn’t, you’re finally able to say, with an open, honest heart, that that doesn’t matter as much anymore. 
“I guess this is goodbye again, then.” 
“Not really.” 
“Oh, right— promise to keep in touch, okay? My patience is running thin with you,” you chuckle at that last part, attempting to joke and make things lighter again. 
“Promise.” 
“I’m going to go home now, by the way. Please tell Yuuji that I wish him the best and I’ll visit when I have my own money to visit Tokyo and all.” 
“I will.” 
“And help me say goodbye to him for me,” you add, “Hope that’s not too much for you to do. Sorry for the trouble. It’s just that I’d actually just about cry if I had to do it in real time right in front of him. Be good to him and be good friends, okay? Keep that promise, at the very least. That’s the one thing that I wish for the most.” 
“Bye, Megumi.” You turn back in the direction opposite of his. 
“Wait—!” 
His hand is on your wrist. Now you’re in front of him, like yesterday, and he’s holding your wrist, albeit a bit gentler than the way he used to pull it a whole eight years ago. 
His eyes are cast away from you, slightly avoidantly and in a way that’s a bit abashed. “I’ll miss you, [Name].” 
“It won’t even feel like I’m not there,” you say. Though his grip is slightly tight, he loosens it as soon as you try to slide it up, as if he’d let you be free of it if you want him to. 
You squeeze his hand instead, turning to face him. It feels warm. It feels like there’s blood coursing through you, the sensation more tender and tangible than it’s ever been. 
“Goodbye.” 
“Goodbye, [Name]. I’ll… I’ll call.” 
“Thank you.” 
Now you’re the one slipping away from his grasp. You move your hand away and walk back. The door slides open. 
2010. Springs, summers, autumns, winters. Hands on wrists, a back faced to your eyes, wide with innocence. Warmth and laughter and happiness and love. Days coloured with vibrant hues and time spent with dog books and in libraries. Frowns were greeted with smiles. Hesitance was non-existent. You didn’t feel a need to compensate for your uselessness. You were a child. You didn’t feel useless at all. You just felt this: a constant leaping in your heart, the corners of your mouth twisting up into a juvenile grin, braiding someone’s beautiful brown hair and tying it with a pretty cherry hair tie. 
You want to cry as you walk back home. 
You’re pretty sure you do. 
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taglist:
@bakananya, @sindulgent666, @shartnart1, @lolmais, @mechalily, @pweewee, @notsaelty, @nattisbored
(please send an ask/state in the notes if you'd like to join! if I can't tag your username properly, I've written it in italics. so sorry for any trouble!)
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wedonthaveawhile · 20 days
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Betraying the devil you know // Part I
Ominis Gaunt x f!MC
AO3 link // Wordcount: 2k // Tags: Explicit | Allies to lovers | Dark | Violence | Jealousy | Angst | Smut | Trauma | Forced proximity | Implied alcoholism | Non-canon deaths | Mafia AU.
Months. That's how long Marvolo Gaunt has been crushing the life out of you. One reckless decision was all it took to be dragged into his inner circle to pay for your sins. However, being his favourite informant has its perks—you hear whispers: a civil war is brewing among the Gaunt's.
Is it better the devil you know, or do you seek refuge in the arms of the enemy?
Read the prologue here.
For twenty-eight years, whispers of slander had perpetually preceded the name Ominis Gaunt.
The Daily Prophet had initially reported on the birth of the Gaunt's second son, however, the family had firmly abstained from providing any photographic proof. While they carried on parading their firstborn in the public eye, their second child seemed forever confined within the heavily guarded perimeter of their estate.
The less reputable newspapers fanned the flames of speculation, dubbing him a disfigured, mutated horror—The Broken Gaunt.
Needless to say, the glowering figure at the opposing end of the blinking wand had no deformed limbs or vampiric fangs protruding from his lips. Pale skin stretched taut over his razor-sharp, and undeniably human, features. He was taller than his brother, with a thinner frame but no less imposing.
The only departure from humanity were his eyes, which bore into her as he awaited an answer to his question.
You let us abduct you, didn't you?
"Yes," her admission came hesitantly, as if the inflection of that lone word could reveal every sin she had witnessed, and every one she had committed—her only leverage.
She could see walls of tightly stacked slate wedged between gnarled beams within the musty gloom. That and the smell indicated they were somewhere underground; the air was stagnant, poisoned with an acrid undercurrent of dark magic and scourgify charms. The combination made her stomach roil. Blood; it always meant blood.
"You don't appear overly concerned, which means my brother intended for me to find you, or you deliberately sought me out." The wizard's robes billowed as he swept closer, a glint of emerald trim contrasting against the dark fabric. "Which is it?"
"The latter."
A final crimson glow flared from his wand before he lowered it to his side, "I trust you understand the gravity of my concern. When Marvolo's lackey is found roaming alone, I..."
She thrust forward in her chair, shoulders wailing in pain from the unnatural posture they were contorted into. "I'm not... that," she bristled.
"Then what?" he retorted sharply, leather gloves creaking as his grip tensed around the notched hawthorn. "Are you telling me I'm wrong?"
"I'm no one; I was forced into this."
"His stories say otherwise."
"He lies."
"I'm well aware."
Her captor fell silent as he paced, grit skittering off the ground with each measured step. She expected his shoes to be abraded and sullied with flecks of blood as Marvolo's often were, but they were immaculate—the polished leather glinting under flickering torchlight.
He came to a halt in front of her, and she shifted uncomfortably with nowhere to go.
"An informant stationed at the Leaky Cauldron is not no one," he said, holstering his wand. "The tales you could tell would be most intriguing, I'm sure."
"That's one way to put it," she craned her neck to better survey the desolate crypt, hunting for any sign of Marvolo's silhouette in the shadows of an alcove. If a year of serving under him had given her anything, it was a crippling sense of paranoia. "I need your help."
"Is that so?" He drawled, brushing off a spider scurrying up his wrist—the epitome of indifference.
"I know you've been following me, and I know what it is you're looking for," she said with a harder edge than she felt. "I'm prepared to offer it willingly in exchange for my protection." 
"Protection from...?"
"From him. He warned us about you, said you've been search for a crack in his organisation, and what he'd do if any of us were caught..." She could feel the heat of Marvolo's breath hissing into her ear, his fingers constricting around her throat. She forced her voice to remain steady. "I'm your way in; I'll tell you everything I know for… I don't know, fuck… a safe house?"
One of the wizards stationed by the barricaded door let out a derisive snort, which was abruptly silenced by a piercing glare from his boss.
"I have veritaserum, and now I have you. Any reward you receive for the effort I've put in to obtain both would be nothing short of generosity."
"Are you generous?"
He found that amusing, smirking down at her briefly before snapping back to cold indifference. "How can you be certain I won't return you to him?"
"Because I know what he did to you."
A muscle twitched in his jaw—a fleeting tic, but she saw it.
"He shares a lot with you. He must trust you."
"Not at all; he just thinks it's impressive."
His ghostly eyes burned with distrust as he dragged a finger across his lips. "Then how did you fall into his circle?"
Her bravado dissipated as her humbled gaze fell to the floor, "I didn't know it was him…"
She flinched as a figure surfaced from the shadows to present a scrap of parchment before skulking back into the dark. Ominis Gaunt bit down on the tip of his glove, stripping it off before curling his fingers and gliding one over the embossed text.
A scoff broke free from her throat before she could rein it in—all those rumours swirling around him for years... His family's efforts to shield him from society.… all because he was blind? How anticlimactic.
She clenched her lip between her teeth as those sightless eyes pinned her down.
"Keep talking."
"I… uh, I thought he was just another drunk customer passing through. He was showing off some gold ornament, bragging about the risks he took to get it..." She paused to swallow her embarrassment. "My friend and I... we needed money."
"You stole from Marvolo Gaunt," he lifted his head with a scornful sneer of disparagement. "What did you take?" 
"A relic," she replied dryly, taking pleasure in how her words wiped the arrogant smirk off his face. "The relic he murdered your friends for."
The weight of his rage was palpable, his fingers twitching as he wrung the note clenched between them until the tearing grain finally broke him from his deliberation.
He gave a terse nod to the wizards on either side of the bolted door.
"Leave."
When the slam of oak against the stone lintel subsided, the room sank into a heavy silence. His body was still as marble, save for the methodical dart of his calculating eyes.
"I can't live like this," she pleaded. "I'm worth your time; I've been listening for months, soaking it all in just for the chance to share it with you. And when he shows himself to take me back, you could—"
His posture straightened with a renewed interest in what she had to offer. "You can lure him out of hiding?"
"He'll come for me," she said firmly, and she meant it. "You and I have a common interest, and I want us to work together to make it happen."
"That shared interest being my brother, dead."
The abruptness of the question clouded her thoughts in suspicion.
Was this a trap?
What if the Gaunt brothers were working together? What if the rumours of their feud were some bullshit story to—
"It's not a trick question," his silken voice sliced through the tangled ivy of her thoughts. "Is that what you want?"
If this plan went up in flames, she was as good as dead anyway, by her own hand or Marvolo's if he beat her to it. There was nothing left to lose.
"Yes."
He stalked around her, icy fingers closing tightly around her arm.
"Don't fucking touch me," she spat, wrenching away in a panic.
Such defiance would have earned her a backhand from his brother, but there was something distinctly less psychotic about this Gaunt than the one she had escaped.
"If I wanted you dead, I'd have you dragged back to where my men found you and let my brother finish the job." He sought out the rope and murmured an incantation to untangle her from its grip. "My hands are, and will always remain, clean. Don't delude yourself into believing you're worth tarnishing them."
Her arms spasmed as they hung limp and utterly useless at her sides; she was at a loss for what to do with them. "Thank you."
"Is everything you've told me the truth?"
"It is."
He withdrew a galleon from his pocket and altered its form into a chair, which he positioned in front of her and took a seat. She braced herself against the stiff wooden back of her own as she rotated her raw, chafed wrists.
"I want you to understand that I hate resorting to these measures, but it's necessary for corroborating your story."
"What measures?"
"Look at me, please."
Before she could process the implication of his request, connect the dots and realise the power he held, her eyes instinctively met his. He exploited the connection to slam his way into her mind.
His mental intrusion sliced through her memories like a sharpened blade through flesh, flaying each one until they lay exposed before him, ripe for his scrutiny.
He pulverised her every attempt to occlude and expel him from her thoughts, smothering her internal cries until it was near silence in the wreckage of her consciousness.
The psychological interrogation began with that night—she could hear her inner dialogue and see her life unfolding like a twisted theatre.
She was watching from the bar as the polyjuiced patron brandished his treasure, laughing uproariously as he recounted the price he paid to claim it. The Leaky Cauldron hosted a constant rotation of travellers; it wouldn't be the first time that something pretty found its way into her bag.
Suddenly, she was in the candlelit hallway of her flat, sliding off her shoes beside Poppy's and padding across the chipped floorboards to the kitchen.
She couldn't shut her eyes, couldn't turn away from the memory projecting onto the dark canvas of her closed eyelids.
Marvolo had followed her home; he had Poppy.
Please, stop.
Ominis' legilimency snuffed out her begging.
For the second time in her life, a Gaunt forced her to watch as the radiant light faded from Poppy's eyes. Scarlet spilled from her lacerated throat as the diffindo tore apart her efforts to scream run —the kitchen knife she wielded as her last line of defence lodged between her ribs.
Get the fuck out of my head.
She felt the mental pull to collapse, but her mind was a marionette, strings pulled taut to forcibly suspend it upright against her body's every instinct. It was excruciating; the occasions she had angered Marvolo enough to warrant a taste of the Cruciatus Curse were the only experiences that came close.
Ominis glanced over the tasks she had been compelled to carry out—ranging from thefts of the ministry's highest-ranking officials, to luring naïve wizards into an ambush, to the deliveries of forbidden artefacts...
He then flitted to what he needed to confirm her worth—Marvolo's threats, sifting through the warnings as if her mind were a catalogued library.
No one will ever touch your skin again; every inch of you belongs to me. 
If you ever try to run, I'll hunt you to the ends of the earth to raze you from it myself.
I'll rip out the throat of anyone who dares lay a hand on what is mine.
Satisfied, he finally wrenched free from her mind, nearly causing her to black out.
Words stumbled across her tongue, just beyond the reach of her unresponsive mind. 
"Don't…" send me back.
She reeled forward and felt fingers dig into her shoulder to stop her from slipping to the ground, followed by a rush of displaced air as Ominis Gaunt disapparated them both.
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night-market-if · 13 days
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Post Chapter Four - Milo
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The next instalment in our book 2, chapter 4 shorts. This time with Milo. And let me just warn you all, ANGST warning ahead! Because I like hurting him. Gives me joy. :)
Join at the Courtesan tier for this and other stories.
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hanshi-hanshii · 9 months
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So(u)l lives on my mind rent-free
@strawbubbysugar
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h0estar · 11 days
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parkitaco · 1 year
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"Mike," Holly huffs, standing over him with her arms crossed, "You're doing it bad."
Mike glances up from where he's sitting on the sidewalk in front of their house, covered in chalk and sweating. "Thanks," he says sarcastically, as Holly kicks her shoe at the drawing he's been half-heartedly creating on the ground. "You're the one who wanted to do this, remember?"
"You're hogging all the chalk," Holly whines, collapsing onto the ground and tossing an arm over her eyes in despair. Mike scowls; anyone who thinks he's dramatic has got him confused with the wrong Wheeler. "And you're not even doing it good."
Mike sighs, glancing down at his half-completed chalk drawing of a bunny, per Holly's request that there be more fun animals, Mike, it's too boring otherwise. She has a point - all his drawings have turned out sort of blob-shaped and ugly. "You do it, then," he says sourly, shoving the box of slightly broken chalk in her direction, and she grins all teeth at him.
Mike pulls his phone out of his pocket, grimacing when he sees the time. With Nancy off at college, he's been getting stuck on Holly-duty more and more often, and he's still got a solid three hours this morning before his mother gets home. Not that Holly's bad company, necessarily, though her incessant criticism certainly isn't helping her case. But it's summer, and Mike had had some vague plans of maybe going to the lake today, and hopefully dragging Will along with him. And besides, Holly's almost nine years old. She shouldn't need full-time looking after. Probably.
As if he's somehow read his mind from afar, Mike's phone buzzes with a text from Will:
hey :)
how's holly duty
Mike smiles, glancing up at his sister, who is currently scribbling out his misshapen rabbit drawing with a stick of red chalk, tongue poking out between her teeth as she concentrates on utterly destroying his attempt at art. It's hard to have authority over someone who knows you're a loser, he texts back, as Holly finishes scribbling out the bunny drawing and moves on to one of his earlier drawings.
don't call my boyfriend a loser :(, Will replies, and Mike's grin widens.
To be fair holly said it first, he types, and a piece of chalk hits him square on the forehead. He yelps and glances up from his phone, scowling at his sister. "Ow!"
"Stop texting Will," Holly says sourly, "and draw with me."
"Who says I'm texting Will?" Mike demands, snatching up the piece of chalk Holly had thrown at him. "And you said I was bad at drawing."
Holly stays silent, staring him down until he reluctantly leans over and starts drawing again. "I know you're texting Will because you have the dumb look on your face," she says, "And it's not fun if you're not drawing with me!"
"My face isn't dumb," Mike mumbles, but he goes back to drawing anyway. Maybe- fish are probably pretty easy to draw, right? He draws a circle with a triangle on the end that looks vaguely fish-like, and then sets about filing in multicolored scales.
Holly starts talking again, babbling on about whatever little world she's drawing at the other end of the pavement, and Mike nods along absently, doodling little circles around the slightly wonky-looking fish and praying that the sunscreen he'd hurriedly sprayed on before going outside is enough to protect his frighteningly pale skin from the blazing sun overhead. It's barely noon, but it's already getting hot, and the sidewalk is in direct sunlight with no trees around to shield him. Holly seems unbothered, though Mike can already see the bridge of her nose pinkening, and he'll undoubtedly get a lecture from his mother lately about taking proper care of his baby sister and whatnot. Even though Holly is literally not a baby, and Mike is pretty sure that when he was nine he was perfectly capable of putting on sunscreen.
It's a welcome relief, then, if a little surprising, when a shadow falls over him, and Mike jumps, dropping his chalk and raising a hand to shield his eyes as he glances up at the person standing over him. When he sees who it is, his entire body relaxes, a slow smile stretching across his face.
Will matches it, offering a little wave as he surveys the situation; Mike, covered in chalk and doodling multicolored circles all over the sidewalk, with his sister five feet away frantically scribbling out his earlier drawings. "Hi," Will says, amused, and Mike waves back, grinning a little sheepishly. "Are we having fun?"
"Hi, Will!" Holly chirps before Mike can answer, popping her head up and smiling brightly. "Mike is being a bummer," she informs him seriously, and Will laughs.
"Is that so," he replies, eyes flicking to Mike, and he nudges Mike's knee with the toe of his shoe.
"No," Mike replies sourly, giving Holly a scathing glare, "I'm being super nice, actually."
Holly is unperturbed, sticking her tongue out at him and going back to drawing, and Will laughs again as he sinks to the ground in front of Mike, crossing his legs beneath him and leaning back on his palms. He looks good like this, warm and tan in the summer sun with a teasing twinkle in his eye and his white t-shirt tucked neatly into his jeans.
"Hi," Will says again, low and soft, reaching forward and tugging at the collar of Mike's t-shirt until he leans forward for a quick kiss. In his peripheral, Mike watches Holly pull a face of disgust, and actively decides to pretend he doesn't notice. "I like your drawing," Will says, glancing down at the fish Mike has been slaving away at, and Mike flushes, whining in embarrassment and scooting away.
"Shut up," he grumbles, reaching for a fresh piece of chalk and halfheartedly filling in one of his circles with purple. "You're the artist, not me."
"Hey, I was being serious!" Will says, laughing lightly, "It's cute."
Mike presses his lips together, giving Will a scrutinizing look. "You're cute," he mumbles, which isn't quite the comeback he'd been looking for but is still, unfortunately, very true, and Will brightens, shooting him a brilliant smile.
"Hey, thanks," he replies, and leans over to steal the chalk out of his hand. "Can I draw too?" he asks Holly, who glances up from where she's drawing a mustache and goatee onto Mike's poor attempt at drawing a cat.
She looks Will up and down, weighing her options, and then nods once, shoving the box of chalk in his direction. "Don't break any," she chides.
"I won't," Will says seriously, placing a hand over his heart like he's swearing it.
Mike rolls his eyes. "You've already broken like half of it, Holly," he says, reaching for a blue piece and doodling another circle near his fish.
"That's why we can't break any more!" she says shrilly, which is a fair enough point. Mike lets it go.
Will smirks, leaning over and sketching out a few gentle lines on a blank stretch of sidewalk. "When does your mom get back?" he asks, as the lines he's sketching gradually take the shape of a much more realistic-looking fish than the one Mike had drawn.
"Like, three maybe?" Mike says with a grimace, pulling out his phone to check the time again. Tragically, it has been less than fifteen minutes since the last time he checked. "She has to do grocery shopping and then yoga, I think. I don't know, I wasn't totally listening."
Will snorts, picking up a piece of blue chalk and drawing gentle, wave-like lines around the two fishes they've drawn. "Okay," he says, chalk-dusted fingers brushing over the back of Mike's hand gently, "But you're free tonight, yeah?"
"Yeah," Mike confirms, "Why, did you want to do something?"
Will nods, filling in little white crests on each of the waves he's drawn. "Yeah. The lake, maybe? I don't know, I just want to hang out with you."
It's impressive, how easily Will is able to make Mike's entire chest fill with butterflies with a single phrase, especially such a mundane one considering how long they've been dating. He bites down a shy smile and nods as normally as he can manage, though he's pretty sure Will can sense the giddiness radiating from him anyway. "That sounds nice," he says, and then, because he can't help himself, "We are hanging out right now, though. In case you hadn't noticed."
Will rolls his eyes, lifting a chalk-covered finger and booping Mike's nose lightly, undoubtedly covering his face in green chalk dust. "I did notice," he says, jabbing his finger at him again, "But- alone, I meant. Sorry, Holly," he adds, glancing over at her apologetically, and she sticks her tongue out at him.
"Mean," she whines, and Mike rolls his eyes.
"Don't dish it out if you can't take it," he tells her, and she scowls, maintaining eye contact with him while she draws a giant red X directly over one of his earlier drawings.
Will's eyes widen. "Cold," he mutters, and holds his fist out. Holly bumps it dutifully and goes back to drawing.
His eyes flick back to Mike, and the corner of his mouth ticks up as his gaze darts over Mike's face. "You have chalk on your face," he informs him, looking like he's trying very hard not to laugh, and Mike scowls, lifting a hand and scrubbing at his face with the back of it.
"That's your fault," he grumbles, and Will makes a fake-sympathetic face as he scoots closer and bats Mike's hand away, raising a still green-tinged hand to wipe at his face. Mike lets him, leaning into his warmth, even as he says, nose wrinkled, "Listen, I can't see my face right now, but I feel like you're making it worse."
Will grimaces, and his hands tragically pull away from Mike's face as he surveys his work. "A bit, yeah," he acknowledges. "I kinda just spread it around."
"Idiot," Mike accuses, and Will grins all teeth, tilting forward slowly like he's falling into Mike's gravity before closing the rest of the distance in one swift motion and stealing another quick kiss. "Idiot," Mike says again, and leans in for another.
"Love you too," Will replies cheerily when they part again, and Mike shoots him the finger before remembering that there's a child present and quickly hiding it behind his back.
"I saw that," Holly says anyway, as she finishes whatever she's drawing and glances up at him.
"No you didn't," Mike says matter-of-factly, and Will elbows him.
"Don't gaslight her," he reprimands, and Holly points at him and nods.
"Come here," she demands, despite the fact that Mike and Will are sitting less than ten feet away from here. "I wanna show you what I made."
Mike wants to tell her to say please, or something, or at least take a slightly less bossy tone with the person who is literally in charge of her for the day, but Will is already scooting over to her, peering down at her drawing with genuine curiosity, and Mike has no choice but to follow. It's a little infuriating and all too endearing, how nice Will is to Holly, and most people in general. He makes people feel important. Mike in particular.
Holly's drawn a rainbow, Mike sees as he clambers over to sit beside Will, hooking an arm around his waist and resting his chin on his shoulder. There are little multicolored hearts all around it, complete with white clouds at either end, and Holly looks way too pleased with herself for someone who's basically just drawn a bunch of lines, but whatever. It's probably better than Mike could do.
"It's for you!" she chirps, grinning wide, and Will huffs a surprised laugh, hand absently coming to rest on Mike's knee. "Because rainbows."
"Aw, Mike," Will laughs, tilting his head back to look Mike in the eye, "Did you teach her that?"
"No," Mike says, squirming closer to him and grinning, "Nancy, probably. She keeps sending me all these lists of queer resources and shit."
Will hums a laugh, thumb tracing gentle circles into Mike's knee as he reaches for his phone. "This is very sweet, Holly," he says sincerely, and she blushes as he snaps a picture. "Thank you."
"You should take a picture of Mike's fish, too," she says seriously.
Mike frowns. "I thought you hated my drawings."
"Not the fish!" she says, and does not elaborate, which- yeah, sure. Mike will take what he can get.
"Here, you take it," Will says, passing Holly his phone, and she hops excitedly to her feet and shuffles over to the other end of the sidewalk to snap the photo.
Mike settles more comfortably onto Will's shoulder, enjoying the solid warmth of him even under the burning summer sun. "You know there's a twenty percent chance she's going to break your phone," he murmurs into Will's ear, still half-hugging him from behind, and Will lifts a hand to rest over Mike's where it's pressed against his side, threading their fingers together.
"She's like four feet tall," Will points out, "she can't break it any worse than I already have."
"You'd be surprised," Mike mutters darkly, and Will laughs, tilting his head to the side and pressing a soft kiss to the side of Mike's face. Mike leans into it, a smile creeping onto his face despite himself.
Holly flounces back over, dropping Will's phone unceremoniously into his lap and resuming her previous position amidst the chalk drawings. "You guys are gross," she announces, as Will presses another kiss to Mike's temple.
"You made a drawing for us, though," Mike points out.
"Doesn't mean you aren't gross," she says matter-of-factly, and Mike supposes it's kind of hard to argue with that. "You have chalk on your face, by the way."
Mike splutters something incomprehensible, and Will laughs quietly, slinging an arm around his shoulders and grinning up at him. "It's okay," he says seriously, "I like your face."
"I like your face too," Mike replies teasingly, leaning in to rest his forehead against Will's.
"Gross," Holly says again, and the sun keeps shining.
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certifiedcallahanstan · 2 months
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The memoir of a horny fangirl
chapter 2
Warnings: This is a pretty heavy chapter, it shows a really vulnerable side to Hazel and the shitty side of the reader. I had to get this chapter done, so the rest can be lighter and more *spicy*. The next chapter will get back to baseball hazel!!
This chapter contains: sa
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It’s been a couple days since you had received the picture and you know you shouldn’t be upset, Hazel is a grown woman and is allowed to kiss whomever she wants, it’s not like you two are together anyways. That however doesn’t stop you from trying to avoid her.
P.J invites you to the coffee shop with Josie and Brittany to do quote on quote “studying” which really means she wants to talk to you all about her latest hook up.
Despite your initial reluctance, you find yourself getting caught up in the conversation.
“and i mean it wasn’t a fucking normal sized strap, that shit was like- fucking xxl” P.J moves her hands at least a feet apart from eachother trying to demonstrate the size and josie scrunches up her nose.
“I don’t need to hear that P.J, you keep that to yourself” she huffs and you cover your mouth trying to stop a laugh from escaping.
For a brief moment, the weight of your emotions regarding Hazel and the photo fade into the background as you lose yourself in the conversation until eventually Brittany convinces everyone that we should probably study.
You pull out your notes adorned with doodles of different sea creatures and facts about them when you hear a familiar voice approach the table.
“Hey guys” the voice that belongs to the shaggy brunette starts “Josie told me you all were studying and that..” she looks at her phone reading the text “We are about to kill P.J, please come before one of us commits a felony”
P.J just responds with a huff a mutters something along the lines of “you all are just mad i get more hoes” as Hazel pulls out a chair and joins the group.
You scoot slightly more away from Hazel hoping nobody will notice. unfortunately these chairs are millenniums old and makes and obnoxious screeching noise
You cringe inwardly, feeling a flush of embarrassment creep up your cheeks as all eyes turn in your direction.
Hazel's gaze flickers briefly in your direction, her brow furrowing in confusion at the sudden noise.
"Sorry about that," you mumble, offering a sheepish smile as you try to play off the noise. "These chairs are... uh, not the most cooperative."
Everyone seems to accept that excuse as they get back to their previous tasks. You start shading in the sea creature you were previously drawing in your journal when you feel P.J looming over you.
“what the fuck knuckles is that” she says as she points at your drawing
you look down at a your notebook where you had draw what looks like a eel-shark hybrid
“it’s called a frilled shark” you start explaining as all eyes look at you “they get their name from the frilly appearance of their gill sets. In fact they’re one of the few sharks that eat their prey whole…”
You trail off awkwardly, realizing that you may have gone a bit overboard with your explanation when you see everyone blankly staring at you. Clearing your throat, you try to steer the conversation back on track.
"Anyway, um... yeah, it's just a cool creature I thought I'd draw," you finish lamely
“I think it’s sick”
you turn your head to the voice and see Hazel smiling at you “i mean a shark that moves like an eel?”
"Yeah, exactly!" you respond, a smile spreading across your face as you meet Hazel's gaze. "It's pretty fascinating how they've adapted to their environment."
fuck why does she have to be so damn irresistible.
your thoughts are cut off by the slamming of a text book and you see Brittany getting up “my brain feels all mushy, im going home to take a nap”
Josie nods, putting her computer in her back pack “i should probably get back to Isabel” and P.J mutters something about going to “fuck then duck” whatever that means.
Soon enough it’s just you and Hazel, you try to ignore the tension, but damn it’s so thick you could cut it with a knife.
For a moment, neither of you speaks, the silence stretching between you as you both seem lost in your own thoughts. You fidget nervously, unsure of what to say.
Finally, Hazel clears her throat, breaking the silence with a hesitant smile. "So... um, how have you been?" she asks, her voice soft and tentative.
You swallow, trying to push aside the swirling emotions that threaten to overwhelm you. "I've been okay," you reply, your voice slightly strained. "Just... you know, trying to stay busy with school and stuff."
and not making out with random red heads and getting chlamydia you add in your head.
Hazel nods, her gaze flickering briefly as she seems to search for the right words. "Yeah, I get that," she says quietly “hey um..have you been avoiding me? i’ve tried to text you but you haven’t answered and everytime i try to come up to you you walk the opposite direction”
your jaw clenches as you start putting everything in your shark printed back pack “what reason would i have to avoid you Hazel” your voice tinged with frustration and hurt.
she runs her ringed fingers through her hair and you try not to notice the prominent veins “that’s what i’m trying to figure out, did i do something?”
“not everything is about you callahan” you grunt out as you try to gather all your loose papers
“here let me help-“
“i don’t need your help” you shove her arm away and in the process her hand hits an open water bottle spilling water all over your notebook. the notebooks that has three years worth of research in it
A sense of panic washes over you as you scramble to salvage what you can, frantically wiping at the water with trembling hands. Hazel watches helplessly, her expression a mixture of concern and regret.
"I'm sorry," she says softly, her voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't mean to... I was just trying to..."
You cut her off with a sharp gesture, your own frustration boiling over as you struggle to contain your emotions. "Just... leave me alone, Hazel," you mutter, your voice thick with emotion.
she steps back as her eyebrows knit together “this wouldn’t have happened if you just let me help. Maybe instead of pushing people away talk to them”
You can see the hurt etched in her features, and for a moment, you feel a pang of guilt tug at your conscience.
"I'm sorry, I just..." you begin, your voice catching in your throat as tears threaten to spill from your eyes. With a heavy sigh, you toss your notebook into the trash and sling your backpack over your shoulder
"I have to go," you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper as you turn away, unable to face Hazel in that moment. With each step you take, the distance between you and Hazel grows, the ache of regret gnawing at your heart.
Hazel just presses her lips together and nods before you see the same red head from the photo calling her name in an annoying high pitched voice.
You watch in silence as Hazel hesitates, her eyes briefly searching yours for any sign of a response. Before you can gather your thoughts, she turns away, putting on a fake smile as the red-headed girl approaches.
"What's up, Becca?" she says, her tone polite but strained, the artificiality of her smile not escaping your notice.
you turn away, knowing that it's not your place to intervene in Hazel's personal life. And also if you stayed there someone would be getting punched in the face, and here’s a hint. it wasn’t going to be you.
—————————————
“Did you say sorry at least?” Isabel ask as you lay upside down on her bed, letting the blood flow rush to your head to try to forget about what Josie now calls “they great water incident” that happened last week
"Yeah, I did," you reply with a sigh, your voice muffled from your upside-down position. “kinda.. i dunno. I mean you should’ve seen the way that becky, bexar, what ever the fuck her name is held onto her”
P.J shoves a handful of chips into her mouth and shrugs “i say kill the bitch”
Josie tosses a pillow at her face and huffs “We already have one murderous charge against us, we don’t need another”
Isabel nods in agreement. "Exactly. We'll figure this out without resorting to murder,"
“fine” P.J huffs holding her hands in the air “but just know that i know people”
“mhmm” you hum as you launch yourself back into an upright position on the bed stealing chips from P.J’s bowl.
As the group starts debating whether han solo or darth vader would be better in bed, you can’t help but wonder at this exact moment what hazel is doing.
——————————————
Hazel sits on her bed in her apartment talking about how the frilled shark can unhinge their jaw and eat prey at least twice their size as the red head sits and stares at her.
Hazel has never been one for social cues, she sincerely honestly thought that Rebecca just needed a friend, and sure they made out at the party but in her defense her face looked similar to yours in the midst of her 6 shots.
So here they are in Hazels apartment, Hazel blabbering about the eel-shark abomination (that she most definitely didn’t spend five hours researching after finding out about it)
“Rebecca? did you hear what i said” she stops and tilts her head with wide eyes
Rebecca nods and turns to Hazel “mhm- yeah the shark is like- long or some shit”
“you seem distracted” the brunette mutters “and it’s not called a long shark it’s called a frilled shark because-“ her sentence is interrupted when she hears Rebecca let out a drawn out sigh and move closer to Hazel.
“Yeah that’s kinda gross Hazey and i’m bored so how about we have some fun…”
“i don’t know what you mean-“ hazel starts before the girl lifts her shirt off and suddenly Hazel realizes why this girl has been being so nice to her.
"I... I don't think that's a good idea," Hazel stammers, her voice tinged with unease as she shifts uncomfortably on the bed.
“come on baby” Rebecca whines as she crawls into an unwilling Hazels lap “I’ve heard how good you are in bed”
And it’s true, Hazel was amazing in bed and she has had her fair share of hookups, but usually she knows about them before.
"Rebecca, I... I really don't think this is a good idea," Hazel insists, her voice shaky as she gently tries to push Rebecca away. "I'm not interested in anything like that right now."
“shhh” Rebecca whispers out as she slams her lips against Hazels and suddenly everything seems too much, Rebecca’s lips are wet, the lights are too bright, the AC is too loud. Panic grips her as she struggles to push Rebecca away, her thoughts a jumble of fear and confusion.
"Stop," Hazel manages to choke out, her voice barely audible over the rush of blood in her ears. She pushes against Rebecca's chest with all her strength, her heart pounding with urgency.
Rebecca pulls back, frustration evident on her face. "What's wrong?" she demands, her voice tinged with irritation.
Hazel's chest heaves as she tries to catch her breath, her mind reeling with a flood of emotions. "I... I told you to stop," she says, her voice trembling
Rebecca's expression darkens, her features contorted with anger as she takes a step forward. "You're just playing hard to get,"
Hazel manages to push Rebecca off her lap and quickly stands up, putting some distance between them.
"I think it's best if you leave," she says firmly, her voice trembling slightly with the effort to maintain composure.
With a frustrated huff, Rebecca storms out of the room, leaving Hazel alone with her racing thoughts and pounding heart. As she sinks onto the bed she grabs her phone with shakey hands and presses your contact then the call button.
“Hey what’s up” your voice bellows out from Hazels phone
“Hey i don’t know what-“
“HAHA JK this is my voice mail, leave a message or don’t i don’t care” your voice interrupts and Hazel can’t help the tears that fall down her face
“Hey..i don’t know if you’ll see this but Rebecca was here and i thought we were just friends, i mean i know i kissed her but i was drunk and..anyways we were talking and-“ Hazels voice cracks “-and she climbed on me and i told her to get off but she didn’t and- and she kissed me and maybe it’s my fault but..i don’t know what the point of calling you is because i’m pretty sure you hate me. I dunno, i just needed to tell someone.”
She presses the hang up button and brings her knees to her chest letting out a sob. How could she have been so stupid? Flash backs of when her dad would buy her these new suits and buttons up because he knew you hated dresses, but then make her get dressed in front of him flashed back into her mind.
Despite her best efforts to push those memories aside, they continue to haunt her, casting a shadow over her as she cries herself eventually to sleep.
———————————
it’s not until two days later that you see the voice mail, you’re sitting in your biology class with your airpod in when you click the play button.
“What the fuck?!” you blurt out when it finishes and suddenly all eyes are on you.
You smile sheepishly as you gather all of your belongings and rush out of the classroom calling P.J
after three rings she answers with a “I’m talking to this really hot chick so this better be important”
“You remember when we said that we weren’t going to kill anyone anymore”
P.J hums “well YOU ALL said that, i never actually agreed to it”
“Yeah well…it’s time for some killing..or at least seriously maiming”
as you explained the situation to P.J, the last thing she said before she hung up was
“let’s go kick some leprechaun ass”
————————————
Okay so YOU didn’t kick some leprechaun ass, P.J insisted she could take Rebecca herself and you assuming it went well because as you were driving (well over the speed limit) to Hazels house you receive a message from P.J saying “i’m like 75% sure she’s still alive, anyways if police come questioning you, say a rabid bear attacked her”
You chose not to question her further.
You get to Hazels house and you take a deep breath, you’ve never been good at comforting people, usually you just pat their back and give them water. You assume that probably won’t work for this situation .
Taking a deep breath, you exit your car and make your way to Hazel's apartment. Each step feels heavier than the last, the weight of the situation bearing down on you with each passing moment.
you knock on the door three times fast, two slow, that was your signature knock for her since middle school. As the door swings open, you're greeted by the sight of Hazel, her eyes red-rimmed from tears. Without a word, you pull her into a tight embrace, holding her close.
“y-you came-“ Hazel mutters out as you pull away and she wipes her eyes
“yeah of course haze, im sorry i didn’t see the voice mail till today”
Hazel nods, her expression grateful as she steps back, allowing you to enter her apartment. As you settle into the living room, Hazel gestures for you to take a seat on the couch beside her. You can sense her hesitancy, so you squeeze her hand and softly smile.
“you can talk to me about whatever, you know that right haze?”
Hazel meets your gaze, her eyes reflecting a mixture of emotions—vulnerability, fear, and a glimmer of hope. With a shaky breath, she begins to recount the events of that night, pouring out her heart and soul to you.
And all you saw was fucking red. How the fuck could someone do this to her Hazel, her sweet, beautiful, funny Hazel?
Your heart pounds in your chest as Hazel's words sink in, each one feeling like a blow to your own sense of justice. Anger simmers beneath the surface as you listen to the betrayal she endured, your grip on her hand tightening instinctively.
Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, you meet Hazel's gaze with determination burning in your eyes. "Hazel, I am so sorry that you had to go through that," you say, your voice firm but gentle. "But I promise you, we will get through this together. I won't let anyone hurt you like that again."
Hazel coughs out a laugh and looks at you with wet eyes “That’s supposed to be my line”
You smile softly at her response, a flicker of warmth spreading through your chest. "Well, consider it borrowed for now," you say, returning her gaze with sincerity. "Because I mean every word of it. I'm here for you, Hazel, no matter what."
In that moment, as you sit together in quiet solidarity, you know that your bond with Hazel runs deeper than words can express. And with that unspoken understanding, you both find solace in each other's presence.
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etrevil · 7 months
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Chuuya next chapter? Skk in one panel together (without shooting the other) next chapter?? NIKOLAI HOLDING FYODOR'S DISMEMBERED HAND???
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