#and you totally hit the nail on the head relating it to my characters
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I started dating some1 who in the beginning was rudely sarcastic & talked to me like I was dumb. Getting to know him + having better communication I told him what crossed my boundaries. he was upset with himself & wanted our relationship to work. not saying he shouldnt be held accountable but he had a hard childhood, like talking down to me was something his father did on the daily (I witnessed it at a family event) it makes me think of ur characters and whats 'normal' to some is toxic to others
oh my gosh anon, thank you so much for sharing this with me!!!
first and foremost, i want you to know how proud i am of you for standing up for yourself and setting those clear boundaries. that can take a lot of bravery, and it’s incredible that you’re looking out for yourself and being open and honest with your partner (as you’ve touched on, communication is so important!!!!!)
if that’s how he was raised, and that’s all he knows, it makes sense that he thinks this type of behaviour would be ‘normal’ in a relationship. exactly like you said, this isn’t an excuse to be an asshole and he definitely needs to be held accountable + do better next time, but it does help you understand him better and explains why he was acting the way he was. i absolutely love your last sentence here, where you say that what’s normal to some is toxic to others because it’s so true. if this is all you’ve ever known and if this is all you’ve ever grown up with and been taught, of course it seems ’fine’ to you, you know? but those raised in healthy and loving homes know that this type of behaviour is neither normal nor acceptable.
this is what i mean when i say people are messy. people are inherently flawed; not one human on this earth is perfect. and no, that’s never an excuse to be abusive, obviously, but what it means is that people are going to make mistakes. they’re going to make bad decisions. and a lot of those times, those mistakes and decisions are going to be informed by that persons past and/or emotions. and to expect someone to be perfect all the time is entirely unfair because it is entirely unattainable. relationships with anyone, whether it’s romantic or not, take WORK. hard work put in by both parties. they require communication and compromise. they are not and will never be perfect.
the very important and very good difference between your partner and my characters is that once you brought what was bothering you to his attention, he took responsibility for it and (i hope!) has now vowed to be more conscious of that and work on it/work on bettering himself—presumably because he cares for you, and he cares for the relationship, and he doesn’t intend to or WANT to hurt you. that is a crucial difference. that is growth! this, in my opinion, is so much more important than the mistake itself. the behaviour after, the reaction after + actions taken after the mistake, and whether or not the person has learned from it or is trying their best to learn from it; to me, that is what makes someone a good person. that is what ultimately shows their true and authentic character.
it is these concepts and the sheer complexity of not only each individual human (especially based on traumatic backgrounds) but also of MORALITY as a whole that fascinates me and that i enjoy exploring within my work. thank you so much for sharing this with me, anon <3 i feel very honoured that you chose to share something so personal, and i really enjoyed digging into this because like i said, it is these notions that intrigue me the most. i wish you nothing but the very best, and i hope you and your partner are doing well <3 always sending lots of love your way!!!
#to be honest with you i think about this a lot in relation to my father as well#because i know how rough his life was; and has been ever since#but then i remember how his behaviour in particular is a pattern and he doesn't often take responsibility for it so :/#either way i understand where you’re coming from#and you totally hit the nail on the head relating it to my characters#because their traumatic backgrounds and experiences absolutely inform their behaviour#but again like i said the crucial detail is that they DONT change#not all of them anyway hehe#once again i thank you for sharing this with me!!! it was really interesting to answer this question <3#please enjoy your thursday and stay safe!! don’t forget to drink water! <3#inky.bb#clari gets mail
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haikyuu!! boys finding out you're a big 'ol nerd
hello i once again return with some headcanons no one asked for B)
what if some nerdy boys found out that you were also a nerd?? I feel like when I tell people I like manga or video games it somehow changes their perspective of me so I tried writing it :)
cw: fluff, mention of bugs, gn reader
characters: kenma, tendou, tsukishima
wc: 700+
kozume kenma
when he hears you’re a gamer, he lights up so fast; like a cat when you open a can of food
if you’re talking to someone else, he’ll pretend he didn’t overhear, but really he’s hanging on to every word you say
if you’re talking to him, he’ll begin asking you your favorite games with a sparkle in his eye
if you ask to swap friend codes he’ll gladly oblige
once you accept his friend request he’s immediately scanning through your library to see what you’ve played
if he sees that you play a lot of games that he plays as well, he’ll get butterflies 💕
in the future he’ll definitely be more open and trusting towards you, since you’re a fellow nerd
will send you video game news and announcements through text, asking if you’re going to get the new game or whatever
he definitely loves it when you send memes or geek out about a game, no matter how much you may spam him he’s reading all of it!!
if you ask him to put his minecraft bed next to yours (even as a joke) he might malfunction for a bit
congrats you now have a high level friend that can carry you on all the hard bosses
he’s also the type to give you a bunch of high level items and money when you play an online game together (because he's absolutely enamored 😳)
kuroo points it out and is totally dramatic about it
“damn, you’ve never given me that much stuff when I play. I almost feel hurt, do you like them more than me now?”
“no comment.”
tendou satori
if you tell him you read shounen jump he’ll probably fall in love on the spot
ok maybe not that fast, but he’s definitely excited to finally have someone to talk to about weekly chapters
he’ll ask to swap numbers too so you can send each other memes and theories about the mangas being serialized
sends a “good morning!” and “goodnight!” everyday to you with a meme or cool fanart related to the manga you’ve been discussing
he absolutely loves it when you ramble about characters, storytelling techniques, how the good the anime adaption is, and other extremely niche nerdy details
if you cry when your favorite character dies, he’ll think it’s so cute and endearing
he’ll tease you at first, but will comfort you nonetheless without being condescending or judging you
he will subtly try to act like characters that you simp for
tendou worries that your reputation might take a hit if you’re seen hanging out with him all the time, so he asks you if it’s okay
“of course it’s fine, talking to you makes my day more fun! plus, who else would I cry to about fictional characters?”
he’s frozen for a moment before bursting out into laughter with heated cheeks
if he hadn’t fallen for you already, he definitely knew this was the final nail in the coffin 💘
tsukishima kei
ok i’m imagining a gecko or bug that accidentally got into the classroom and no one wants to touch it because they think it’s gross
tsukishima would, but he doesn’t want to attract any unnecessary attention so he just sits back and watches his classmates scramble about
until you show up and gracefully scoop up the lil guy with tenderness and adoration, carefully heading towards the door to release it outside
he probably already thought you were cute, but now he has a reason to talk to you that doesn’t seem forced
he stops you before you get out the door, asking to see the creature in your hands
you ask if he wants to hold it, he’s a little surprised but will say yes
when your hand brushes his, adrenaline explodes in his body but he makes no outward indication about how nervous he really is
you excitedly ask if he likes creatures too, which leads to a wonderful conversation about how bugs and stuff are actually really cool
until you both remember that he still has a bug in his hands that needs to be outside
you continue chatting while heading towards the door and it might seem like he’s not listening; responding with one word answers and nods, but he’s just trying to keep his cool
if you exchange numbers, he’ll send you pictures of bugs or reptiles he finds outside that he thinks you might like
if you have any pets that require tanks (fish, bugs, reptiles, amphibians etc) he’ll subtly ask to come over so he can check them out
“hey, we should study at your place sometime.”
“you know you can just ask me if you wanna see my pets lol”
"...hmpf"
#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu!! headcanons#my work#haikyuu x reader#kenma x reader#tendou x reader#tsukishima x reader#haikyuu hcs#sfw#haikyuu#kenma fluff#tendou fluff#tsukishima fluff#kozume kenma#tendou satori#tsukishima kei#gn reader#haikyuu!! x reader#haikyuu!! hcs
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For @sambuckylibrary TFATWS Anniversary Event! How late is this fill? Yes. I just couldn't get the idea out of my head.
CW: Grief and related discussions
Sam didn't jump when the door to his suite in Sharon's place opened. He didn't even turn off his phone screen, like a kid being caught up past their bedtime. Or like a superhero whose phone rang in the middle of a delicate mission. He did set the phone aside and turned to find Bucky in the dimness of the room. Despite the thriving nightlife and the pulsing neons of Madripoor outside, the room remained dark without the overhead lights on. One lamp, in the far corner, provided all there was.
Bucky paused halfway between the bed where Sam was sitting and the door he'd just come in. "Do... do you want to be alone?" he asked hesitantly.
Bucky was impossible to figure out. Every time Sam thought he had his temperament down, Bucky hit him with something else. Sam thought he was broody and a loner; Bucky made friends with strangers on the street. Sam thought he was confident and sure; Bucky deferred to Sam's judgement before answering. Sam thought the adrenaline would be coursing through him after running for his life; Bucky showed up in soft athletic shorts with a quiet voice.
Sam gave a quiet, bitter chuckle. "The opposite, actually," he answered. He picked up the phone and waved the lit screen at Bucky. "I wish someone very specific was here."
Bucky came over with padded, but heavy, foot steps and sat beside Sam on his bed. He took the phone and scrolled through the line of texts on it. "Romanov?" he asked in surprise. "Were you two...?"
Sam shook his head and took his phone back. "No. We were just friends. And I really miss her ribbing right now. God, do you know how much shit I'd have to hear if she was around to find out about my phone ringing during that debacle with Selby?"
Bucky offered him a small smile and handed his phone back. "I didn't know her as well as you did. Tell me about it. Tell me what you wanted to tell her."
Sam turned the screen off, then tapped his thumb nail against the black box of it. "I told Fury once--after DC, when Steve and I were getting ready to find you--I told Fury I was more of a soldier than a spy. Nat found out I'd said it--swear it was Steve who ratted me out--and she made it her mission to train me in the ways of spycraft. It was usually silly stuff, things you'd expect out of a children's book, the fun, easy, practical stuff. But I think the first thing she told me was to always leave my phone on silent. As soon as it rang in there, I think I heard a thousand lectures all at once. Man, she probably would've made me take a bunch of laps around the gym for that."
"She made you exercise when you were a bad spy?" Bucky asked in amused confusion.
"Nah, because she woulda been chasing me," Sam corrected with a small laugh. "And then you in that club, when that guy tried to dance with you? God, I just wanted to take a picture and send it to her."
"He was brazen," Bucky agreed.
"It was the first time you really dropped character all night, y’know? The Winter Soldier woulda just pushed him away but you froze and got all wide eyed and old-fashioned."
"I am not old-fashioned," Bucky argued with a roll of his eyes.
"Nat would've agreed with me," Sam said with a total confidence in his voice. He watched his own reflection in the screen of his phone and then sighed. "She'd love all of this. I bet she had Madripoor on her map. I wanted to call and ask her about it when we first heard about it. Steve always called what she did 'intel gathering' but I think half the time she already knew what he was asking about. She was so smart and so sharp." A pang shot through his chest and he squeezed his eyes shut, swallowed away tears in his throat.
Bucky's hand came to rest on Sam's thigh, lower down by his knee. "I'm sorry she's gone," he said softly.
"I wasn't even there to say goodbye," Sam whispered back. "She died for us, to bring us back, because we failed in that fight."
Bucky's fingers tightened on Sam's knee, and then his arm moved around Sam's shoulders instead, pulling him into an awkward half hug. It was made all the more awkward when Sam collapsed against Bucky's side and hid his face in the meat of Bucky's shoulder. The day had been long and exhausting and exciting and terrifying. For so many years, he'd had people to fall back on after days like that. There were jokes and greasy foods and other people who had gone through it too waiting in a crappy motel room.
And now what he had was a fancy but empty room, a partner who didn't trust him, and a gnawing hunger in his stomach for something he was never getting back. The danger persisted in this country and a whole new crop of problems awaited him back home. Legacies and prejudices and desires and expectations, all coming from a thousand places, all pulling him in different directions.
All he wanted was to hear Natasha laugh at him and Bucky for tripping over their own feet on this one. He wanted to know what she'd say about the shield. He wanted her next to him no matter what decision he made. She'd instantly defied the Accords to be next to Steve when Peggy died and Sam could really use that kind of selfless, unconditional support right now.
Bucky curled closer to Sam, using his other arm to brace him upright. "I'm right here," he murmured. "It's going to be okay."
Sam nodded against his shoulder. Maybe that would be enough later. And maybe one day it would be enough to keep going in the future. For tonight, he let himself feel safe with Bucky and let himself miss Natasha with an ache so profound that maybes and optimism weren't cutting it.
And still despite that, an optimistic maybe lingered as Bucky rubbed his back and stayed right there, just like he promised.
#sambucky#sam wilson#bucky barnes#captain america#sambucky fanfic#the falcon and the winter soldier#writing#tfatwsanniversaryevent2023#tfatws
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TOTAL DRAMA REVIVAL TIERLIST + THOUGHTS
After binging all of the new season, I've updated my initial tierlist! Priya stays winning, no surprise there. Thoughts about the ENTIRETY of the new cast (with spoilers) under the cut!
Let's just start off by saying that the over the top toilet humor and intro aside, this was a great season. While Pakhitew Island was rancid with blatant obvious character tropes, this season managed to make most of their characters relatable while parodying at it.
But as for Caleb, Scary Girl and Ripper... Those were on the nose too much for my liking. Caleb got the season 1 Justin treatment, Scary Girl is literally Jinx from League of Legends, and Ripper is nothing but a shoehorned character for fart jokes. It sucks because I thought Ripper was going to be great. His personality is pretty solid and reminds me loads of McArthur.
Now that I've got the slog out of the way, time to dissect the more intriguing parts of this show!
Nichelle, Damien and Axel were tremendously robbed this season, and you know it.
Axel's dexterity and agility would have no doubt gotten her far. Unfortunately, her prickly attitude got her booted very early, akin to Eva's elimination back in the original TDI. She's definitely the Shawn of this generation though. And hey, which begs the question — is she his kid? It's been 15 years after all...
Nichelle was nothing like the mean girl label everyone pegged her for. Just a typical rich, famous celebrity that's never been out of her comfort zone. Rude and vicious? No, she had the team spirit and was always ready to pump up her team. I love Dakota, so I am definitely a fan of Nichelle, the two being so alike. In her elimination episode, she had a breakdown where she realized that she wasn't "all that". It was honestly pretty sad to see.
Damien was the person with the most common sense on that show. It's funny how he's just wants the million bucks and never seen the show before. But when he sees what there's up against? He's totally done. FINALLY, A CHARACTER THAT GETS IT. He's a whole vibe. In the end, he decided he wanted to stay after he did some awesome heroics, but his team voted him off like he wanted... Better luck next time.
Speaking of next time, apparently these three do have another shot. They've all been invited back for another season, which means that we can explore these characters far more! Let's hope that the writers do not miss this opportunity.
As for someone that I don't think overstayed their welcome, MK definitely takes the cake. She was honestly a great character with witty comebacks and superior intellect. I think she got just the right amount of screen time. We got to see her in action while making room for other character's developments to shine. Nice.
Wayne and Raj are what happens when you combine Katie and Sadie with Geoff and Brody. I found their bromance pretty sweet actually. I don't think they had much time to grow more distinctively from each other though. And I know how everyone was betting their money on them or Caleb/Bowie as the gay couple, but I'm so so glad that they weren't.
Instead we got a delightfully surprising pair — Bowie and Raj. While I did want to see more build up, with 13 twenty minute episodes, you can't really do much. But no matter, I still thought they were plenty cute! I needed to see them smooch in the finale though. It would've been loads better than...
Chase and Emma.
How this pair irks me to no end. Chase is an incel and Emma is stupid for going back to him. Really hit the nail on the head with the on and off again couples of the world. Seen this way too often.
Speaking of which, I think you all owe RR Emma an apology. Because RR Emma actually had loads more character outside of her boyfriend. We got to see her in action, taking charge, her fiesty attitude, the great dynamic with her sister!
But this Emma? All she did was whine nonstop about how Chase was a horrible boyfriend only to go back to square one. Every second of her on screen was either her wanting to torture him in the best way possible or lusting after him. Girl... After everything Chase's done to you, him granting you immunity in a round does not cut it.
I'll give some points for the Bowie/Emma friendship. Except for the fact that it centered around Chase mostly, UGH. Bowie going "ew straight people" is how I felt about this whole ordeal.
And in case it wasn't obvious enough, Chase deserves to be ejected into sun. He radiates toxic masculinity. He wanted to change Emma's name to "Chase's Girlfriend"? He thought a guy should win the finale? He can't take no for an answer and keeps pursuing his ex? I hope he rots, ew.
Bless Zee's heart for being bros with him. Goodness knows I could not do that. But let's face it, Zee is bros with everyone on this island. He's that stoner friend everyone needs. Just chilling, making some unintentional funny comments, you get the gist. I first pegged him to be the scaredy cat type, but seeing him in the zone instead was hilarious. And he's the amputee! How cool is that?
Now I know I haven't talked about one of the best parts of Total Drama — the villains/antagonists.
Julia was a very fun twist villain. At first, she was just Dawn but if she was a social media brat. I was surprised to see that facade crack and her true colors shine. Instead, she's a two faced teenaged girl, which I see a lot in society. Putting on a show for others only to bash them in private. Watching her let loose was a thrill and I was here for it. Her manipulation, scheming and determination is unmatched.
At least, that's what I would say if Bowie didn't exist.
How Bowie absolutely dominated that competition. He was here to win and he meant it. Seeing him pull the strings was a sight to behold. He convinced the team to vote off Caleb at first glance, outsmarted Julia at her own game, ruined Priya and Millie's friendship, and snagged a pretty cute boyfriend too. If that's not absolute winner things, I don't know what is.
Which brings me to the part I've been waiting for. Last, but certainly not least of all, Priya and Millie.
These two are MY Total Drama inserts, I'm so sure of it. Millie disgusted by her own generation and Priya's obedience to follow her parent's dreams were things I felt in my soul. I know that they weren't popular when the characters were first leaked, but I'm so glad that they beat the early boot allegations.
Millie's character arc is one of the best things of the season. She came here to write a book slandering the people her age and thought of herself as above everyone else's nonsense. But then Priya happened. Priya was nice to her, she was the first real person to ever make Millie feel good about herself. And that was the wake up call Millie needed and the turning point of her life.
Priya also learned something too — self worth. She was too eager to be friends with Millie off the bat and have nothing but good energy all around. Only to realize that maybe she's putting more effort into their friendship than the other person is. And as someone whose been in that position multiple times, it absolutely broke me.
And everything went to hell when Bowie gifted Priya the notepad in which Millie was writing smack about everyone. Of course, Millie had changed her mind and was trying to be a better person, but karma catches up to you. Priya finally let herself be gulfed in anger and Millie truly got hit with the great significance of Priya coming into her life.
In the end, Millie managed to apologize and pour her insecurities out to Priya about everything. It brought both tears to me and Priya and the two of them reconciled. This was the best friendship story I've ever seen written on Total Drama. It's like what Gwen and Courtney could've gone through in All Stars...
Also, Priya wins. How cool is that? I rooted for her at the very start AND SHE WON. I'm loving this so so much. I'm sure there's another alternative ending where it's Bowie but the one I watched was Priya so that's the true happy ending to me :3
Sidenote: Anyone wanna talk about the Priya/Damien ship tease? Honestly I'm glad Priya didn't blush at anything Chase said; I know the fandom thought they were going to be a couple. But the best girl Priya and the best boy Damien had a hint and that's another win for me.
Think about it, a girl who's prepared for Total Drama all her life with someone who's never seen it before? GOLD. They were even paired for the finale! Do you think next season will have them be a couple? Manifesting that so bad with a real Chase/Emma breakup. And more Raj/Bowie while we're at it too, yeah?
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I was tagged by @magic-ace in this post where they wanted me to answer all of them, so here it is:
🎱 ⇢ post your AO3 total stats
🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction?
A classic tale of "my favorite character didn't get enough screen time" led to this.
🌵 ⇢ share the link to a playlist you love
🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?
Give it a 5. I don't mind it but it's difficult to focus on the proofreading side of it.
🛼 ⇢ describe your latest wip with five emojis
🔥🔥🌞🔥🔥
🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?
@magic-ace @mecha-milkers @i-am-an-omen
🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love
I haven't finished it, but Descent by Zakharie.
💌 ⇢ how many unread emails do you have right now?
Zero.
🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis
@brockendrems
🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both?
Original characters. Reader inserts aren't for me.
🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before
I will share one of my favorite taekwondo stories from many years ago because I think it is funny. Two different short dads I was sparring with managed to accidentally nail me in the face with the same kick on two different occasions, months apart. (You cannot hit the face in taekwondo but going for a headshot it happens a lot.) The first time miraculously didn't knock out any teeth but my upper lip got stuck in my braces and I had to rip it out while laughing maniacally. I looked like a corpse for weeks. The second time was straight in the nose, so my nose is still slightly crooked and makes a crunchy noise if I wiggle it to this day.
Both of the dads felt terrible but I was a teenage boy so I thought blood on my uniform was cool.
The "short dad curse" was real for a bit there and the only reason it hasn't continued is because I am now the short dad myself.
🎲 ⇢ what stops you from writing more in your free time?
I don't have this problem.
🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings
Knock Out and Breakdown roughhouse a lot.
🧸 ⇢ what's the fastest way to become your mutual?
Reblog my shit with silly tags.
🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now
I'm learning to animate, which is cool.
I'm feeling a little more hopeful about finishing my degree.
My friends are wonderful.
📚 ⇢ what's the last thing you wrote down in your notes app?
I don't use the notes app.
🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character
I know better than to share that on this hellsite.
🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?
Typical murder-related writing searches.
🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on
I got a small notebook to write tasks in, things I've done, what and when I ate, etc. This has been very helpful for memory loss and blackouts.
❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?
Don't have one, but one of these days I want to write something more hopeful, something along the lines of a 2010s-era superhero cartoon but as a novel. Don't have a plot for that one yet. It's rotating in my head, though.
🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity
One of the best pieces of writing advice I ever heard was "give yourself permission to suck." When you sit down to write you can't be fixated on making it perfect the first time. All your first draft has to do is exist. Anything you write down you can change later, but you gotta get it down first.
🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh
My roommate and I keep saying "inch resting" and "ingredience" to each other.
🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?
Any.
🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate
He makes admittedly funny puns. That's it. That's all I'm giving Silas.
🥝 ⇢ do you lie a lot? what's the most recent lie you told?
I don't lie except for safety.
🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately
Grief.
🦴 ⇢ is there a piece of media that inspires your writing?
A few.
🍅 ⇢ give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing
Don't give my characters enough time to "rest"--it's one crisis after the other. That's the way I like it but someone get em therapy what the hell
🐚 ⇢ do you like or dislike surprises?
It depends what kind.
🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here
She barely made it halfway down to the gallows before something slammed into her, knocking her into the side of the building and shattering a line of windows. The crowd gasped and looked up, and then all Suncatcher could see was shadows and broken glass and the gun someone shoved into her face.
“If you can’t sit back and watch nicely,” Crossfire said, “then you can’t watch at all.”
“Go to hell,” Suncatcher said, and the blades on her forearms snapped out and stabbed into Crossfire’s midsection.
☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username?
Thought ShortCircuit would be a good pen name for Transformers fanfic. It eventually became a new pen name overall, though I still use NobleRunaway in other spaces.
🐝 ⇢ tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them
@magic-ace @mecha-milkers @i-am-an-omen I love you guys so much. May your pancakes always be fresh.
🌸 ⇢ do you have any pets? if you do, post some pictures of them
So remember when I answered one of these with "grief"
🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it
This doodle of Knock Out because it speaks to me.
🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?
I wrote an entire rant and deleted it because the internet can't read. But there is something and it falls under mischaracterization.
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surprise bectha totally didn't expect me 🥴 n e ways, managed to choose only 5 intead of 12 hahahaha totally joking hahahaha sorry 😔😔 // 1 - 23 - 44 - 57 - 129
i totally did not expect you, not at all HAHA thank you for your enthusiasm regarding my book ramblings x.x it's nice to have someone discuss books with me here bc i literally have nobody *cries
book recs ask game!
#1 - a book that is close to your heart
looking for alaska by john green. i'm not really sure what's with that book?? it's not a 5-star read and i keep finding more and more flaws on it every time i reread it but i do it anyway. i think it's close to my heart in a way that even i can't figure out yet.
#23 - a book that is currently on your TBR
the thief by fuminori nakamura. someone i trust reviewed it as 'what the fuck did i just read' and i think that's the only criteria for my tbr atm :D all i know is it's crime/thriller/mystery and ik the japanese always nail that so i have high expectations. here's to hoping that i won't hate it!
#44 - your favourite fantasy novel
it's a tie between six of crows by leigh bardugo and iron widow by xiran jay zhao. both are interesting but on opposite ends of the fantasy(?) spectrum. (also these aren't high fantasy, really can't get into those i'm sorry :<) the former is more tied to magic while the latter is more involved in sci-fi. 5-star reads with well-written characters (read as strong women), highly recommend them :]
#57 - a book you want to hit bonk your head with
i think i've mentioned this before but a little life by hanya yanagihara. maybe if i bonk my head with it, it would match the heartache this goddamn book put me through.
#129 - a book with beautiful prose
aside from vuong's books that i'm sure you know HAHA, the white book by han kang!!! paragraphs upon paragraphs of good writing man. not a spoiler, but the author's just basically metaphorically writing about white things and how they relate to the central plot but it's sooooo well done. i wanna write like that ;n;
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I posted 2,256 times in 2022
That's 800 more posts than 2021!
29 posts created (1%)
2,227 posts reblogged (99%)
I tagged 2,238 of my posts in 2022
Only 1% of my posts had no tags
#our flag means death - 693 posts
#the locked tomb - 233 posts
#nona the ninth - 72 posts
#dracula - 67 posts
#taika waititi - 54 posts
#gideon the ninth - 42 posts
#harrow the ninth - 37 posts
#our flag means death spoilers - 33 posts
#uk politics - 31 posts
#what we do in the shadows - 26 posts
Longest Tag: 140 characters
#i really really really really hope that olu truly being that comfortable in the captain's quarters is a sense of foreshadowing that pays off
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Chapters: 12/19
Fandom: Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, My Fair Lady (1964)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Characters: Jaime Lannister, Brienne of Tarth, Tyrion Lannister, Bronn (ASoIaF), Catelyn Tully Stark, Renly Baratheon, Podrick Payne, Hyle Hunt, Margaery Tyrell, Pia (ASoIaF), Josmyn "Peck" Peckledon
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Historical, The My Fair Lady AU no one asked for, Well except for me, and then i decided to write it, Jaime as Henry Higgins, Brienne as Eliza Doolittle, romance and shenanigans ensue, Lots of found family in this baby, I wrote this originally for the JB of it all, but the secondary story is Brienne Having Supportive Friends Rights
Summary:
When Brienne Tarth's speaking voice is insulted in the streets of King's Landing by Professor Jaime Lannister, she decides to take him up on his offer for elocution lessons.
--
Chapter Summary: Hyle Hunt attends the Unification Feast and meets Miss Brienne Tarth
5 notes - Posted January 24, 2022
#4
My totally serious, not-at-all-influenced-by-the-acetone-fumes-in-the-room 5 star yelp review of my sister’s nail salon/therapy business, now open with a badge that says she can do what she wants, trust me
TRULY impeccable service from a Professional here at @madebycoffee‘s “Not Allowed to be Applebee’s” salon. Ms. Coffee provides excellent nail art while serenading you with either ABBA or My Chemical Romance. (Make sure you don’t intend to join her in singing; you WILL be cautioned as it could ruin your nails) Then about halfway through the last coat of polish, she’ll hit you with a one-two punch of The Giggles that’ll unlock a secret emotional breakthrough (breakdown?) that only shrimps are aware of. It will be life-changing. Also your nails will look fabulous.
5/5, definitely will come again
6 notes - Posted June 9, 2022
#3
I’ve been writing all day, and I feel it’s important the world know that I’m currently working on an Actual Kraken Edward Teach fic because I’ve gone full brain-rot:
“Is this—is this new?” Stede reaches up, and touches the tip of a black tentacle brushing hair away from his face.
Yeah. Since—yeah. It’s new.
It aches to hear the clipped way Ed’s voice echoes in his head. It aches even more to know he could have prevented it by finding this new strain of courage a few days sooner than he did.
“Since I left.”
The tentacles holding him steady in the water don’t tighten or relax in any way, but they begin to tremble.
Since you left.
7 notes - Posted April 10, 2022
#2
Chapters: 11/19
Fandom: Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, My Fair Lady (1964)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Characters: Jaime Lannister, Brienne of Tarth, Tyrion Lannister, Bronn (ASoIaF), Catelyn Tully Stark, Renly Baratheon, Podrick Payne, Hyle Hunt, Margaery Tyrell, Pia (ASoIaF), Josmyn "Peck" Peckledon
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Historical, The My Fair Lady AU no one asked for, Well except for me, and then i decided to write it, Jaime as Henry Higgins, Brienne as Eliza Doolittle, romance and shenanigans ensue, Lots of found family in this baby, I wrote this originally for the JB of it all, but the secondary story is Brienne Having Supportive Friends Rights
Summary:
When Brienne Tarth's speaking voice is insulted in the streets of King's Landing by Professor Jaime Lannister, she decides to take him up on his offer for elocution lessons.
Chapter Summary: Before the Feast
--
My only REAL solid NY resolution is to finish this fic this year. I can SEE the finish line. I can TASTE it. So here we fuckin’ go.
8 notes - Posted January 4, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
🎵
"I'm Going to Go Back There Someday" from The Muppet Movie
song | lyrics
It’s the night before Joffrey’s wedding, and there is not a single room in the Keep that isn’t filled with people Jaime cannot bear to be around. His brother has been sullen and more drunk than normal, stewing in wine and resentment that too easily cracked through his usual façade of nonchalance. Jaime has seen flashes of the war playing out between his brother and his father since his return, and while he can’t blame Tyrion for disappearing into his cups, it doesn’t make him exactly fond of being around him when he smells of rotten grapes.
Cersei is no better. Jaime is not about to remark on the common ground she and Tyrion share, but her only passion in the weeks since his return have been the rages she only dares to fly into when she and Jaime are alone, seething with a white-hot venom at the plans their father has put into place. She had told Jaime that he had been too late, accusing him of refusing to move forward with the march of time, and yet Jaime cannot rid himself entirely of the thought that Cersei is the one clinging to the past: a past where she refuses once again to defy Tywin, a past where the world conspires to harm their children, a past where Joffrey is still a sweet boy, and their love is still alive enough to taste fresh. Jaime can feel the love he has for Cersei still, and perhaps that is a part of his heart that refuses to catch up to the world, but there are days where the love is not as fresh as it was when they would tumble into the nearest chamber in defiance of a boorish king. It is slowly preserving itself in amber, to be remembered.
So Jaime avoids the family he fought so hard to return to, and finally finds himself looking out to a calm and quiet sea with the noise of the pre-wedding festivities booming behind him. He strides along the parapet, and soon he discovers he is not alone, and he resolutely strides towards the figure looking out to sea.
“Not one for palace intrigue tonight?”
Jaime knows it’s her even before she turns at the sound of his voice, knows where he can find soft curves in her strong and broad shoulders, knows the way moonlight turns her plain, straw-like hair into something celestial. He is not certain, but it feels like he would know those things about her even before he had seen every inch of her dripping with water and fury. It’s unsettling to imagine how well he knows her sometimes, so it feels safer to approach her with aloofness, with quips. That is how Jaime knows to survive a tender heart in the Red Keep.
Brienne frowns at him, and Jaime catches the familiar glower in flickers of torchlight. She no doubt recognizes the bitter undertone in his voice, and she is clearly in no mood to be his punching dummy simply because Jaime is in a bad mood. His mood sours even more when she does not reply to him. She simply steps to the side, making room for him in her small corner of the walkway. Jaime remembers this treatment too well from when she had him chained. He had talked himself hoarse on more than one occasion, and it had been a rare event indeed when his constant haranguing had forced a response from Brienne.
Tonight, however, he is too tired to continue the pretenses. Jaime sighs, stepping next to Brienne. “Ignore me, Brienne. I came out here to escape people in foul moods; I shan’t bully you out of a similar refuge just because I have apparently been infected with their sourness.”
Brienne nods slightly, Jaime watches the tense line of muscle in her neck relax slightly, and they stand in silence, looking out to the moonlit waves. Jaime can’t hear Brienne breathing, but there is enough of a shift to her shoulders in his periphery that Jaime feels like they are breathing in tandem. Perhaps it’s simply both of them breathing in rhythm with the sea.
“Do you miss it?”
Brienne starts at Jaime’s sudden question, and she peers at him curiously.
“Miss what, Ser?”
Jaime hopes he never loses the thrill of Brienne calling him ‘ser’, that he never loses the cool wave of peace that brushes against him when she utters that word.
“Tarth. Your home. Your family.”
Brienne turns back to the sea, her blue eyes searching the horizon for her home island, the sapphires in her eyes searching for the Sapphire Seas that almost led to her death in the bear pit.
“I don’t know. I left Tarth dreaming I would be awash in glory on the battlefield, and I hoped that it would bring my father honor as I could not do so a—as a more traditional daughter.”
Brienne’s smile is as bitter as Jaime’s had been when he approached her, and Jaime resists the urge to reach out. Even as they stand alone, there are too many spiders in the walls of the Keep who would relish the chance to spin a single comforting touch into a wild tale of the Kingslayer passionately embracing the Maid of Tarth, and that is risk enough to stay his hand. That the comfort might be seen as unwelcome is an even larger risk that Jaime refuses to admit.
“But I know my father loves me as best he knows how. There is something of his love within me every time I have raised my blade; I do so to protect myself, but it is also protect my father’s daughter. I would not bring him more grief.” Jaime has not seen many smiles from Brienne. Most of them have been bitter or bordering on sneers, another wall of patchy armor Brienne has had to cobble together to protect herself. He recognizes that type of smile all too well. But now she turns to him with a beautiful and sad smile, one that feels dangerous with the depth of its sincerity.
“It is dangerous for me to dream of returning in glory, but I do wish to return—once I have fulfilled the duty set before me. I wish to return to my father and be unashamed in who his daughter has grown to become. I--” Brienne pauses for a moment, and Jaime has never seen her so vulnerable. “I miss the blue waters of my childhood. If I cannot obtain glory and honor, I would see them again before I die.”
It is possibly the most Jaime has ever heard Brienne ever say, and he dare not destroy whatever magic has created this outburst of trust from her, so Jaime bows.
“Thank you for indulging my question, Lady Brienne.” Jaime holds up his false hand, knowing Brienne is ready to protest at being called a lady. Her eyes flicker over the intricately carved gold, and she closes her mouth. “No—peace. I shall leave you to your thoughts. Have a pleasant evening, my lady.”
Jaime turns, resolute that he will not glance over his shoulder. That night, he dreams of the sea.
11 notes - Posted January 16, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#LMAOOOOOOOO LAUGHING AT MY GOAL TO FINISH MY FAIR MAIDEN THIS YEAR#I AM LAUGHING IN MY CLOWN MAKEUP AND PIRATE HAT#sweet baby angel#all it took was for taika waititi to kiss his best friend to send that resolution into a spiraling tailspin
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Honestly you can’t compare the drama between the WNBA and the NWSL The WNBA has 25 years on the NWSL 10 years that’s the equivalent of like a 25-year-old grown person Vs a 10-year-old kid Lol anyways it’s a very young league with very young fans who are idealistic. But the question you’re always asking is can NWSL fans forgive players for awful characters Yes I know and most likely No.
Anyways you hit the nail on the head when you said that soccer fans really don’t like chaos Vs basketball fans do Love chaos totally different and very interesting.
Yes, exactly. It does seem like the basketball fandom is a little more capable of forgiving and forgetting. That's just different and interesting, not better or worse. I want to clarify again that I wasn't implying one is better or worse than the other. I guess it came off that way and I offended a few people. But that wasn't my intention. But they are different sports with different cultures and different fandoms. And those fandoms do overlap. So it's interesting to me to compare them.
And not just the fandoms. It's interesting to compare the athletes too. They can all relate to each other on the basis of being elite athletes. But a lot of their other experiences are wildly different. I touched on the national teams earlier, but it's a great example. The women's national soccer team gets no love at all from US Soccer. They have to sue their own federation into not screwing them over. But they get all the media coverage and ticker-tape parades. The women's national basketball team gets real love from USA Basketball. But they get an apathetic shrug from US media. They don't get parades or talk shows after winning.
For elite basketball players it feels like a thankless year-round grind that no one sees. But some of those overseas teams pay good and USA Basketball flies charter. For elite soccer players, it's a year-round grind appreciated by a big cult following. But no one pays well for women's soccer and the national team is a legal headache.
Also, as far as influence, female soccer players definitely have more media influence. But due to the way USA Basketball is organized, female basketball players know some extremely influential NBA players. So they have some pretty influential networks, even if that isn't reflected in how much media coverage they get.
Anyway, I just find it interesting to compare the different worlds and cultures of the two sports.
One last thing. I honestly hope the NWSL never gets WNBA levels of drama. I hope NWSL players never have to deal with a murder mystery or hostage crisis. It's awful. I hope female soccer players never have to risk their safety for a paycheck like that. I don't want that to carry into the future for women's sports.
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗
thanks for sending this ml 🫶
fun fact, i uploaded my first ever fic on the 6th of november 2023, and over the five and a half months since then i have posted an additional 55 fics, bringing my grand total to 56 as of the 20th of april 2024 😭
here are my five favs 🫶
TRANSGRESSION
You're in love with Spencer Reid. He's in love with somebody else.
WARNINGS: SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE MAEVE ARC, LOTS of misunderstanding, Spencer is kind of a bad friend, lots of arguing, major character death
pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader
genre: ANGST
wc: 8.2k
a/n: this is basically just angst after angst and although technically it has an optimistic ending for the reader, poor spence does not get the same courtesy—
COPYCAT
A copycat killer recreates a notorious case that the FBI solved in 2004, and their best option for solving it comes in the form of the original killer themself, you.
PART ONE, PART TWO
pairing: s3!spencer and gn!unsub!reader
genre: mystery, crime drama
wc: 4.5k, 14.4k
a/n: it’s a two parter but i’m putting it here as one fic because it’s just one continuous story 🫶 sociopath!reader you will always be famous in my heart
JEALOUSY
6. "Don't touch me."
WARNINGS: spencer is a bit of a twat but apologises profusely afterwards, arguing, happy? ending
pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader
genre: angst
wc: 2.5k
a/n: part of the climacteric event that just ended a few days ago, i love making characters suffer for the sake of entertainment 🫶
FORGIVEN
You lied to him with good intentions, but when he finds out the truth he says something detrimental in the heat of the moment. After weeks of radio silence any chance of reconciliation is almost lost after you get critically injured in the field.
WARNINGS: SPOILERS FOR IAN DOYLE ARC, harsh arguments, death wishes, gun mentions, major character injury, details of gun related injury
pairing: spencer reid x gn!reader
genre: ANGST with a happy ending
wc: 3.7k
a/n: this has gotta be one of my top favs just because i really think i managed to hit the nail on the head for the angst part of it
LITTLE THINGS
You'd like to say that you were entirely successful in emotionally removing yourself from your coworkers, but Spencer had managed to work himself into a crack in your emotional wall and the rest of the team is starting to notice.
WARNINGS: fem!reader, reader being dismissive and cold duh
pairing: spencer reid x cold!fem!reader
genre: fluff
wc: 1.5k
a/n: i knew i wanted to add a cold!reader fic in this list, but i wasn’t sure which one, so after some deliberating ya girl settled on this one, it’s a cute introduction methinks
thanks again @cumulo-stratus for sending this my way, and fic authors please don’t hesitate to self promote even if it’s not prompted by anyone else, put yourself out there my guys
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#spencer reid angst#criminal minds angst#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds fluff#mgg#red’s masterlists 🍒
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A TAXONOMY OF LOVE (2018) BY RACHAEL ALLEN - SPOILER-FILLED REVIEW
For the review WITHOUT SPOILERS, click here. To continue WITH spoilers, begin reading after the cover photo.
Overall Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
I am actually surprised with myself for giving this such a high rating as I am easily very bored with the teen romance novels. Of the few YA romance that I have read in the last year this has been my favorite which was a total surprise! I actually almost gave up reading it in the first 50 or so pages because I found the initial few chapters from Spence’s point of view unrealistic. For some reason I just didn’t feel like the dialogue and thought processes going on in this 13-year-old boy’s head felt accurate to the tween boys I’ve known growing up. There wasn’t enough swearing or boyish grossness. For instance, I feel like he needed a bit of a sprinkle of yucky (belching/ nose-picking/ farting/ name-calling) like the boys in Stephen King’s “The Body” aka Stand by Me (1986), The Sandlot (1993) or Stranger Things (2016) because many boys at this age are generally just pretty gross and obnoxious in my experience. (I grew up tween to teen between 2008-2018 and babysat lots of kids and now I work with middle school and high schoolers…)
HOWEVER, I think Allen did nail Spence’s dorkiness, which is why I ultimately kept reading because he is pretty adorable and his taxonomies are pretty funny.
Unlike John Green (The Fault in Our Stars, 2012 and Turtles All the Way Down, 2017) and Becky Albertalli (Simon vs the Homosapien Agenda, 2015) who are two of the best teen writers that can accurately display the minds of the opposite sex in my opinion, I feel like Allen struggles a bit with writing Spence’s point-of-view. I found Hope’s p-o-v more realistic (and relatable) as a female, but I think that Spence became more realistic as the book progressed from age 13 to 19. Especially once he hit puberty, I think the romantic stakes and thoughts were more accurate to a teenage boy. Haha. But what do I know? I’ve never been a teenage boy.
Hope reminded me a lot of myself because I’m generally happy-go-lucky, but I had a major emo-phase in high school that really warped my attitude at the time (and admittedly comes out to play occasionally as an adult.) I wish we had more chapters from her perspective. I was bummed out when her sister died. It's hard to lose someone so close to you, especially when they're so young. The only thing I didn't like about Hope was her last name, Birdsong. I think it was just a little too on-the-nose. If we're really going for the "girl next door" she could have just had a basic last name like Smith or Miller.
I really liked all the little parties the characters through for the holidays and the references to Hamilton (2015), Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975), Grease (1978), and Pokémon. Jayla and Spencer's Pikachu and Ash costumes sounded adorable. I feel like Hope’s transition over the story is actually a lot like Sandy’s! Also, the two girls at the Halloween party who were Sandy before and after, such a cool costume idea!
Jayla and Dean were both kind of annoying at times, but ultimately, I think they had good hearts, but were just a little too self-involved for their own good. I really appreciated after Dean went to college and grew up a little and started to stand up for Jayla and Spencer.
I also like that the book goes over some important topics like racism and the Civil War, disability awareness, bullying, mental health, and using sexual situations as a coping mechanism.
My top three favorite parts are:
The Vice Principal’s Surprise -- I mean DICK CONFETTI? How much better can it get?
2. The Tree Stand in the Rain -- My little heart at all the romance:
3. The Lightning Bugs -- Just such a sweet and magical moment.
Would I Read this Book Again?
Low key kind of want to read it again right now! I hope they make a movie of this!
#book review#spoiler review#ya novel#rhps#rocky horror picture show#tourettes syndrome#disability rights#disabled community#ya romance#teen romance#georgia#grease#pokemon#hamilton#rachael allen#a taxonomy of love
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Yo, I feel you!!!! I hate it when people get rude when you aren't social. Like, there is a difference between lacking high energy/not being talkative/not engaging and just straight up rudeness and disrespect. And I feel like a lot of outgoing, social people think it's acceptable to be rude or take things personally when you don't act the same way they do and also dare to be in their presence. Like, not talking is not an attack! And it's very weird how there is this odd group think that everyone needs to act the same way. Do you not know what a personality is? Like, sorry for having one?
I don't know how many times I've had people say that they thought I was mean or a bitch because I wasn't talking and they thought I was intimidating. Or they just straight up were rude and attacked me because I was quiet. Like, if I wasn't even thinking about you and you tell me that, what does that say about you? Your insecurities are not my problem and my mother did not give birth to me to entertain you. Like, if you are so social, don't you make an effort? Or go talk to someone else. I know my attention or lack of it is that special, so what's your problem?
I sound bitter but I've dealt with this my whole life. I've even had supervisors be assholes to me because I was quiet and didn't engage the way they wanted. So I can only imagine how it is at work 🫥🫥🫥 I also think it's insane that people let their feelings show like that at work. It's a professional setting, why are you turning this into High School Musical?
I do hope it gets better. It would be ideal to get a new job but I totally get how tiring that is.
And I am def gonna chat to you about The Bear!!! I have literally been counting the days. I'm so excited to see Tina and Ebra's story and also Sugar! She wasn't my favorite in the first season but to some degree I did relate to her (as a responsible sister who is never taken seriously). I kind of feel like she and Sydney might get close and I would love that. I love high strung characters for some reason so Sugar is really growing on me. Obviously excited for Marcus too. Have you seen the trailers? What do you think of Molly Gordon's character ahowing up? I cannot wait!!!
You've definitely hit the nail on the head!!! Sorry that you've had to deal with so many assholes like that, too. I'm such a people pleaser that I have a tendency to go out of my way to make sure people DON'T think I'm intimidating because but then it ends up draining because being super chatty is not naturally who I am and you're right - I'm not here to entertain them/make sure they're comfortable. Like, at some point I just gotta be me.
I just watched the trailer! I knew it was out but hadn't got around to seeing it. I forgot how much I really loved the chaotic vibes of this show. "Hell of a lot of Sydney's in here" loll - Tina and Ebra at culinary school is going to be so interesting! That small snippet of back and forth between Carmy and Molly Gordon's character has me hooked like idk who she is but I'm intrigued. Also I'm tired and delirious rn and the Original Berf shirt made me laugh way more than it probably should have 😂
#also yess it'll be cool to see more of Sugar especially more around everyone and the shop#bestie anon#ask
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I posted 105 times in 2022
29 posts created (28%)
76 posts reblogged (72%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@mybeautifulmultitudes
@black-kpop-fans
@bonemarr0w
@love4hobi
@hob
I tagged 81 of my posts in 2022
Only 23% of my posts had no tags
#kuroko no basket - 9 posts
#kuroko no basuke - 8 posts
#kuroko's basketball - 8 posts
#fuck - 5 posts
#knb - 4 posts
#genshin - 4 posts
#about the author - 4 posts
#kuroko - 4 posts
#murasakibara - 3 posts
#villain archetypes - 3 posts
Longest Tag: 128 characters
#i couldn’t find the right photos and it wouldn’t have adequately expressed my love for you to just carelessly throw out any 😞😔
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
KnB Main Boys as Archetypes
Kuroko- The Stalker (possessive, spasmodic)
Kagami- The (Mission Oriented) Serial Killer (violent, unrepentant)
Aomine- The Sadist (sociopathic, reckless)
Midorima- The Master (psychopathic, selfish)
Murasakibara- The Monster (detached, unstable)
Akashi- The Kingpin (greedy, domineering)
Kise- The Devotee (obsessive, narcissistic)
A/N: What do y'all think of these? Did I hit the nail on the head or miss the mark? I'm writing up expansions for each of these now, and I'll probably include Hanamiya (a.k.a Kyle), Imayoshi (a.k.a Trevor) and Haizaki (a.k.a Nick) after I finish up the main guys.
(P.S I'm taking very light inspiration from formal psychology on these and kinda just feelin' out how I would personally interpret each of the archetypes and how they would present in(ex)ternally in each boy on a mental, physical and emotional level.)
24 notes - Posted November 23, 2022
#4
WHEW CHIIIIIIIIILLLLLLE, THAT TEPPEI KIYOSHIIIIIII!?!!!??!!!😩😩😍😍😍🤌🏾🥵🥵🥵🥵
That man?! Dat man right der?!?!!?
He can, and when I say this I mean it in the most polite way possible...
✨𝑅𝐴𝐼𝐿 𝑀𝐸✨
Like he possesses my ENTYRE. HORT. OKEH?!
I love him so much it's ridiculous.🙃
He's the perfect mix of sassy and sensitive and confident and humble and FUCK. 😩
What I wouldn't give for him to be real...
27 notes - Posted March 20, 2022
#3
So, I recently started Kuroko's Basketball and lemme tell you...
Aged up Midorima, Aomine, Kuroko and Ponytail Murasakibara™️ can GET. IT.
Like, I want them to ✨ 𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒍 𝒎𝒆 ✨
Collectively and disrespectfully.🙃
(And by me I mean a fictional extension of myself that manifests through one of my conjured OC's since I am actually ✨𝓪𝓮𝓰𝓸𝓼𝓮𝔁𝓾𝓪𝓵✨.)
But anyway! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Das all.✌🏾 (Oh, but also, does anyone else think Murasakibara is totally not hot if his hair's not pulled back?)
40 notes - Posted February 24, 2022
#2
Aight, so this may be common knowledge, but Sephiroth is ✨𝑮𝑶𝑹𝑮𝑬𝑶𝑼𝑺✨
And also sexy as fuck 🥵
And he's just a bit of a creeper...🙃
But real talk, LOOK AT HIM:
See the full post
49 notes - Posted May 14, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
One (1) Sex-Related Headcanon for Aged Up!Generation of Miracles ft. Kagami
A/N: Hey hey y'allll! I feel like I haven't actually written up and posted anything on here in some time, but I have been hella busy lately with school and work and prepping for my driver's test and just life in general. But anyway! Today I have for you one (1) sex-related headcanon each for the aged up main boys of Kuroko's Basketball. I will be expanding on these very soon and creating full lists for each boy. In the meantime, enjoy!
Tag List: @lamnwar @sailewhoremoon
Koko- Is a pussy eating GOD 🥵
Seriously, this man will have you shaking, crying, screaming, squirting and creaming with just a few well placed flicks of his tongue.
He is absolutely cunt obsessed, and his naturally giving personality combined with his slight oral fixation makes him unbelievably skilled
And WHATEVER YOU DO...sit on his face
I cannot...just- 👏🏾...sit on his face, he will literally have hearts in his eyes if you do
Kiki Aomine- Has a hand kink 🤚🏾
See the full post
61 notes - Posted March 12, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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物の哀れ ( ‘the sadness of things’.)
Characters : Alpha! Jungkook x Omega ! OC.
Genre : Arranged Marriage / Temporary contractual Marriage.
Warnings : Non- Con/ Extremely Dubious Consent . High functioning alcoholism. Genre related consent issues. Implied suicidal thoughts.
Summary : A recently widowed Jungkook agrees to a contract marriage to keep his company afloat. His grief overwhelms him and it is hard to look at his new wife as anything other than an intruder .
[ Author’s Note : 物の哀れ ~ Mono no aware can be translated as ‘the sadness of things’. It comes from the words 物 (mono – thing) and 哀れ (aware – poignancy or pathos). The ‘sadness’ in question comes from an awareness of the transience of things, as taught by Zen Buddhism. When we view something exceptionally beautiful, we might feel sad because we know it won’t stay so beautiful forever – but appreciation only heightens the pleasure we take in the beautiful thing in that moment. ]
Chapter 1 Chapter 2
Chapter 3
“Yoongi left a bunch of painkillers for you. He said you can take up to three per day.” Jin said calmly , carefully slipping the sleeves of my t shirt over my wrist as i held my arms out for him. He slipped the shirt over my head gently but his arms hit my shoulders, jostling me. I swallowed the whimper of pain that shot through me at the movement. Mina was now awake, happily wiggling around on her rocker.
It was a little past seven in the evening and Jungkook wasn’t due to arrive for another hour .
“I could sleep on a bed of rusty nails right now. I’m so tired and i don’t know why. “ I whispered, staying still as he carefully drew the fabric down over my ribs, before stepping back.
“I’ll sleep in the nursery with her. You should take the bed. You’re in no shape to be up and taking care of her when she wakes up. Jungkook’s asked me to stay here during the day because I’m not going to be performing for a couple months anyway and I’ve been losing my mind, rattling around that huge ass mansion all by myself. ”
The phone rang, startling both of us.
I groaned before moving to get up but Jin oppa held a hand up.
“Stay in bed. I’ll go see who it is.”
I watched him disappear out of the room, settling back against the pillows and reaching for the ice pack in the small cooler by the bed. I had to ice my ribs every hour or so and while it didn’t seem to be helping much, I definitely appreciated the temporary numbness it offered.
Jungkook’s guilt had driven a new wedge between us and he hadn’t so much as looked at me in three days.
I wasn’t sure entirely if this was a good or bad thing. The fact that he seemed to be considering that he had to get his emotions under control to stop hurting the people around him was a welcome change. But the idea of going back to being ignored and treated like furniture , wasn’t really all that appealing.
“Jungkook’s parents are on the way.” Jin’s voice broke through my reverie and i jumped.
I resisted the urge to sob out loud .
Mr and Mrs. Jeon were on the opposite side of the grief spectrum and just as annoying.
Where Sooah’s parents were intent on making Jungkook remember their daughter as often as possible, Jungkook’s parents were intent on making him forget her.
The only thing the two of them had in common was a burning hatred for me.
Jungkook’s parents had wanted him to quit the company and sell it when it went into loss but Jungkook had categorically refused because that would result in all of his employees getting laid off, and back then Jungkook had been nothing if not ridiculously compassionate. Jungkook’s parents firmly believed that if it hadn’t been for me, their son would be back in Busan, letting them raise their granddaughter.
“Great, that’s great. Did you tell them their son is not around?” I grimaced. I’d only met them three times in total and the last time was in the hospital two months ago when Jungkook had crashed in the middle of a board meeting, weeks of starving and dehydration catching up to him. It hadn’t been a pleasant experience, getting cursed out in front of the doctors and nurses and it probably won’t be any fun in the privacy of my home either.
Jin gave me a sympathetic smile.
“He’s already told them he’s on the way. I’m going to take Mina out on a walk. Give you guys some privacy. Shoot me a text when they leave.” he said gently.
“Can’t I come with?” I begged and he laughed.
“That would be a bad idea, even if it weren’t for the cracked rib. Just relax. Smile and nod and let them spew whatever nonsense they want and then they’ll leave. ”
I opened my mouth to tell him how many flaws there were in his plan when the doorbell rang.
“And that’s my cue. Text me, yeah?” Jin moved to pick Mina up from the rocker before reaching for the baby carrier on the table.
I debated the pros and cons of staying in bed and finally decided against it, gently throwing my legs off the edge and raising myself up to a sitting position. I heard vague voices by the front door, Jin’s sweet tones mingling with Jungkook’s slightly gruffer ones.
I heard the door close and the stillness of the apartment was as oppressing as ever. I could hear him quite clearly though. The clink of the keys as they hit the bowl, the small click of the door as he locked it.
i could imagine him, exhausted from the day’s work, briefcase held in one hand while the other tugged on the knot of his tie.
I imagined for a second, what it must have been like for him with Sooah. She was a bright , incredibly cheerful person. Everyone kind of faded into the background when she was around. Sooah had always been the first to smile at a stranger, the first to laugh even if the joke wasn’t funny. The first one to stand up to help someone in need.
I swallowed, clutching the sheets to ground myself.
I guessed that she must’ve always rushed to greet him at the door. I could imagine him wrapping both arms around her waist, drawing her into a hug or even a kiss.
How was your day, Kookie? (I’d heard her call him that, once when they had been at my father’s house for a charity dinner. )
I wondered if perhaps the very sight of her would have taken away all of the day’s exhaustion from him. Perhaps, he would forget all the ways his company had been failing back then at the sight of her beautiful laughing face. Perhaps losing his company hadn’t been as terrifying as losing his job.
And perhaps once he lost her, he just couldn’t bear the thought of losing his life’s work too. And so he’d agreed to meet my father’s demands.
My fingers began trembling a bit .
I could imagine her moving around the house, pregnant and glowing, laughing as he nuzzled into the curve of her belly. Had he perhaps pressed his lips to her skin, whispered sweet endearments to his daughter through the fabric of his wife’s clothes? Had he perhaps loved Mina, deeply? WAs it just his grief that made it hard to be near his wife. Or was it perhaps me? Me holding the baby that should have been in his beautiful wife’s arms.
The wife he had been so madly, deeply in love with.
Love, I thought vacantly.
It wasn’t something I had ever felt, for anyone until I’d began caring for Mina.
But what Jungkook had with his wife was something different wasn’t it?
The love a man had for a woman. Laced with desire, longing and passion. A love that made you put their happiness over your own.
Love like that had never been in the cards for me.
Ever
I was an Omega. Rare and hated and known for being selfish and greedy. People didn’t love my kind. They avoided me. They always assumed I would take advantage of them. My peers growing up had treated me with so much contempt.
The girls would whisper how I was trying to seduce their boyfriends. The boys would call me a tease, even when I stayed far away and did nothing to attract their attention. I’d gotten used to it. It didn’t bother me. it was the way of the world for me. Ad it wasn’t like I could honestly deny some of it.
I looked at handsome alphas and wanted them. I wanted to be held and cherished. To be bought pretty things and cared for. It had taken decades for me to beat that part of mine into submission. To remind myself that if I ever let that part of me out, it would destroy me.
But love? Being in love with someone?
I didn’t know what that could have been like for Jungkook.
Or maybe I had but I couldn’t recognize it because I’d never received it myself. Whatever the cause, it was for me, a fairytale. It was hard to imagine people loving each other so much, to the extent that they would die for each other. ( Jungkook’s words still hung in the back of my mind : that he had wanted to follow her even in death )
Jungkook was right.
I could never know what his loss was like.
Because I would never know what he had lost.
It felt a little like being dipped in an ice cold lake in the middle of winter. My skin broke out in shivers, hair standing on end and I felt my throat go dry so swiftly. I’d never wanted to run away so much. I wrapped a hand sound myself, scooting back on the bed again. I reached for the blanket, wanting to pull it over my head and curl into a ball.
Shut out the world and all the things that didn’t make sense.
“Are you alright?” Jungkook’s voice broke through the haze in my head and I swallowed. He had an alpha’s voice and my body responded even if my mind resisted. It didn’t happen all the time. Jungkook couldn’t control me. But sometimes when I was feeling vulnerable, instincts took over . I was already dropping the blanket and smiling softly.
“Mina’s out for a walk.” I croaked out, surprised at how awful my voice sounded.
I felt the press of something against my fingers and I blinked, staring at the glass of water Jungkook was pressing into my hand.
“Don’t worry, I called them and told them not to come over.” He said quietly , watching me drink with still trembling fingers.
I swallowed and stared at him.
“I... Thank you. “ I said fervently, feeling a few knots come undone in my gut. I couldn’t really stand up to Jungkook’s parents the way I did with Sooah’s parents. Because Jungkook loved them deeply and hurting them would be the same as hurting him.
“There’s a party in a couple of days. It’s my birthday. I’m turning 34. Yugyeom’s organizing the whole thing, so I’m going to hire a babysitter for Mina, because Jin hyung will be there too and you need help caring for her anyway. You can stay home and rest. ” he said .
I scoffed.
“I’m going to come with you.” I said firmly.
Jungkook frowned.
“What?”
I glared at him.
“I’m not letting you go to a party organized by your shit for brains friend, Jungkook. You’ll probably end up getting drunk out of your mind and killing someone and I’m not going to hang around to clean that up. I’m coming to that party and I’m making sure you don’t have more than one drink. “
Jungkook’s frown deepened into a scowl.
Did you ever look at your wife , like this? With so much loathing? I thought stupidly. Or did she only ever get to see the sweet and wonderful side of you? Did she ever annoy you the way i seem to every second of the damn day ? Did you hate certain things about her too? Or was she so perfect that you could only feel love ?
“ I can take care of myself. Its my birthday , I can do whatever the fuck I want.“ He snapped.
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.
“Not unless you’re a five year old kid in the sandpit, which you’re not. You’re an adult and when you make stupid decisions as an adult, very real people end up paying for it. You’re old enough to know this Jungkook and for once, just listen to me. You can drink, fine. But I’m going to be there and if I see that you’re getting drunk, I’m going to bring you home. You either agree or I’m going to call Yoongi oppa .”
That made him pause.
“Fine. Fuck you.” He snapped, turning on his heel and stalking out of the room. A few seconds later I heard the door to the shower slam shut.
I wanted to follow him and shake some sense into him but before I could decide if it was worth jostling my body, when another sharp pain lanced through my ribs.
Oh great.
I took deep breaths the way Yoongi had taught me. Apparently, pneumonia was a thing that could happen, so i had to breath carefully to reduce the risk of that happening.
The birthday party organized by Yugyeom was going to be a whole entire migraine inducing disaster. I could already feel the headache come on. It still amazed me that Jungkook was friends with him and his cronies.
Yugyeom and his friends were the typical; brain dead alphas who thought themselves superior to all other ranks. Even worse, they viewed omegas as objects: fucktoys to be more precise and I bristled when i remembered the way he had always stared at me.
Well, if he stepped anywhere near me, I would kick him in the teeth.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Jungkook’s mother turned up at home the next day, I wasn’t entirely surprised. I wasn’t surprised but it didn’t make things any more pleasant.
“We’re willing to take Mina for a couple of days if you would both need time to prepare for the party. This is the first big event Jungkook’s holding after Sooah’s passing and we want it to be perfect. As his wife, i hope you’ll do your part.”
Mrs Jeon’s pinched face did nothing for my already frayed temper.
“There’s not much i can do with a cracked rib, mother.” I said politely. It stung, having to call this bitter, cruel woman mother but then, such was life. It was late afternoon and Jungkook was probably sitting in the comfort of his air conditioned office, being flattered and doted on by his smitten secretary while I sat here entertaining his vicious mother.
“Nonsense, you’ve probably just scratched it. I know how you omegas like to exaggerate. “ she waved off my injury easily. “ There are so many details that need to be decided on and its unfair to drop all of those responsibilities on poor yugyeom’s head. Why don’t you go with him and help out a bit?”
The idea of going anywhere with Kim Yugeom was easily the most repugnant thing to me.
“I’m sure he knows Jungkook much better than I do. If i interfered, I’d only be getting in his way.” I said politely.
Mrs. Jeon hummed.
“Well, its good that he’s agreed to the party at least. That woman never let him meet with Yugyeom or his friends when she was around.”
That woman being Jungkook’s late wife.
I felt a sudden fondness for her. Clearly she had also recognized Yugyeom for the absolute pig that he was and kept her husband away from his rotten influence . But unlike with her, Jungkook didn’t actually care about me. So I had no way of stopping him from meeting the idiots. Yugyeom’s family was rich and reputed and it was clear that the Jeons wanted the friendship and the connection. Why else would they keep pushing for it so much?
“Is there any particular reason you’re here, mother?” I said finally, after hearing her babble on and on about caterers and invitations and what not.
“I was hoping to meet Mina...why isn’t she here?”
“I’m not able to care for her well, what with the rib. The doctor has advised me to rest so Jin oppa takes care of her during the day. Jungkook picks her back up on his way back from office. I can send her over to your place with him this weekend.”
“That would be fine i suppose. Have you spoken to the decorators about changing the portraits put up in the house?”
I blinked.
“Sorry?”
“The penthouse, we’ve got it back now right? why don’t you move there. We have a cook and a housekeeper .”]
“this is closer to Jungkook’s office.” I had no idea where the penthouse was and could only hope it was farther way.
Mrs. Jeon frowned.
“This apartment is too small. Not to mention, you still have Sooah’s photos everywhere in this place. Surely that’s not healthy. Get rid of them and put up pictures of you and Jungkook.”
Jungkook’s parents didn’t know that our marriage had an expiry date. i wasn’t sure if this was a good or bad thing. But they saw me as nothing more than a way to get rid of Sooah from the deepest recesses of Jungkook’s mind.
“I’m sure, with time...Jungkook can make that decision by himself. When he’s ready for it.” I said gently, beginning the fresh throb of pain near my temple.
“Nonsense, Heejin. Men won’t ever move on until you force them. Have you considered getting pregnant?”
I jumped about a foot into the air.
“I...what.” I croaked out.
“You need a child too. He mated you. He owes you that. I’m going to tell him that he better do his duty by you.” She said firmly.
“Please don’t.” I shouted, stunned out of my mind. Was this woman even sane?
“Why not?” She frowned looking at me like i was the one being unreasonable.
Why not? Because its barely been four months since he lost his wife of seven years to childbirth. Surely, you don’t think the remedy to that is to have him go through it all over again.
“ Mina is still small, mother. I’m sure we can wait a while. Maybe after she’s one or two.”
Jungkook would probably move on by then. Of course he would. Grief was overwhelming but it was also finite. It did get smaller over time. Easier to cope with. Jungkook would eventually be able to navigate his life around his grief. He would learn to make new connections and who was to say one of those wouldn’t be a compatible match?
So two years from now, there was no reason Jungkook shouldn’t meet another lovely woman, a beta maybe and eventually expand his family. Of course i would be nowhere in the picture at the time. But that was fine.
I remembered something I’d read somewhere, a while back.
If two people are like ships that pass in the night, they meet by chance for a short time , then do not see each other ever again.
Like ships passing by each other in the night, I reminded myself. That's what Jungkook and I were.
“Well, if you think that’s wise.... fine. But now that Jungkook’s doing well, why don’t you entertain people more often? You haven’t had a dinner party here yet, have you?”
And so it went on, over an over for a whole two hours until I was wrung out from sheer exhaustion, my head throbbing and nails having dug half moon indents into my palms from fisting my hands too hard.
By the time i finally closed the door on her face, I couldn’t help but sag against the door, sinking to the floor in a heap, cracked rib be damned.
I glanced up at the solo portrait on the wall. The one my mother in law had wanted gone.
“She must’ve really hated you, huh?” I said casually pulling myself up to my feet and moving to the dining space to stare at her face more closely.
She was dressed in her wedding gown, a fitted mermaid dress with lace and satin detailing. She had a bouquet of white lilies in one hand, elbows bent and the blooms resting on her shoulder while her other hand curved around her slender waist.
Beautiful was an understatement, I thought vacantly.
“ You look like you didn’t put up with people’s bullshit. That’s cool I guess.” I smiled a little. “ You know in another world, we may have been friends.”
I bit my lips.
“Yugyeom was shitty to you too huh? He seems the type. i’m glad you kept Jungkook away from him. I wish you’d somehow help get him away again. He doesn’t listen to me. Thinks I’m trying to control him or something. ”
It was ridiculous. What was i doing.. Why was i talking to a framed picture on the wall. God.
But now that I’d started, I couldn’t quite stop.
“About what happened with Jungkook... I don’t want you to think i was seducing him or anything. And when i said that I hated him calling your name when we... well you know why i said it right? It wasn’t anything personal...i was just pissed. I don’t enjoy the sex by the way... I don’t think he does either but he’s an alpha and you know how it is…they need that release or they kind of lose their mind .. So trust me we both hate the principle of it.... but at least he cums and well I don’t. He’s never made me cum. That should say something about how we feel about each other.......”
“Uh.. Should I come back later?” The voice near the doorway was so unexpected my heart jumped right to my throat and I screamed, stumbling a bit to the side.
Min Yoongi stood framed by the door, one hand wrapped around a bouquet of flowers and the other clutching his bag and stethoscope. He still had his white coat on over his shirt and slacks, hair mussed like he’d run his finger through it.
It took me a second to remember that Yoongi had a key to the house.
Another second to remember exactly what I’d been doing when he came inside.
Good God.
Had he heard the part where I’d talked about Jungkook not making me cum? Surely not? Oh Please no.
“Jungkook told me to check on you. That you couldn’t sleep last night? Are you in a lot of pain?”
Jungkook and I had shared the bed in his room last night and I had apparently, tossed and turned and whimpered through the night in pain. Or so Jungkook claimed.
“Uh... I’m not sure. He said so... so..”
“you guys sleep together right?” Yoongi asked casually, taking his coat off. I stared at the way the material of the shirt strained over his shoulders, my throat just a little dry.
Yoongi smelled so ridiculously good. He was a doctor and he was so handsome and kind to me. The attraction would have been there even if i had been a beta but as an omega, the urge to just fling myself at him and beg him to make me his, it was kind of horrifying.
Tamping down that part of me, I gave him a casual shrug, heart still pounding.
“Yeah. There’s just two bedrooms here and one is Mina’s nursery. So ...” I finished awkwardly, watching him move around and place his bag on the table before unwinding the stethoscope, placing it around his collar.
He gave me a small smile.
“I’ll just take a quick look and check how your breathing sounds. that okay?” He asked gently.
“Oh... sure. You need me to take my shirt off?” I asked curiously.
He gave me a quick little smirk.
“Not for medical reasons no.” He winked.
I felt blood rush to my face along with guilt. What was I doing? This was Jungkook’s best friend!! His hyung. Someone he trusted and I was his....
His what?
Nothing. I was Jungkook’s nothing. When was the last time someone had flirted with me . Someone who wasn’t a grade A creep.
Yoongi moved closer, sitting down on the kitchen stool and beckoned me to come stand between his thighs. i moved, achingly aware of how much more potent his scent was up close. He looked up at me through sooty black lashes, a small smirk on his lips, feline eyes warm and open .
“Put your hands on my shoulders, yeah?” He prompted.
I hesitated, fingers shaking just a little before reaching out to rest on this shirt. I kept the touch feather light , the softness of his shirt the only thing I could feel.
He hummed and bending down to lightly tug the hem of my shirt out of the waistline of my jeans. I bit my lips to stop myself from squirming.
He glanced up , eyes meeting mine and holding my gaze.
“You good?”
“Uhuhbuh.” I stuttered and he grinned wider, pulling the fabric up to the curve of my breasts. He lightly ran his finger tips over the bruised skin , humming thoughtfully .
“You’ll be fine in a few weeks. Hang on.” He pulled back, plugging the steth in his hear before holding the other end up to my chest. He pressed it against my skin, just before the underwire of my bra and it was unexpectedly cold .
I jumped, fingers curling on his shoulder and squeezing down.
“Hey.. what’s wrong?” Yoongi whispered, hands reaching for my waist, gently holding me steady and I flushed. He looked genuinely worried , lips turned down and brows furrowed and i felt absolutely stupid.
“Sorry. Sorry.... It’s nothing.. i just.. it’s a little cold.” I laughed nervously and his gaze softened.
One hand still curved around my waist, he brought the diaphragm up to his mouth, holding my gaze as he gently breathed warm air all over it.
My throat went instantly dry and i had to swallow. He pressed it against my chest again and this time it was so much warmer. .
“Better?” He prompted and i nodded, guilt and discomfort churning in my stomach. What was i doing? I had no business indulging him. i had no business indulging any man. Ever.
I looked away, pulling my hands up off his shoulder, pushing his hand off my hip as well . He didn’t say anything his shoulders stiffened at the subtle rejection.
A mantle of awkward tension settled over us, a small thundercloud of regret and that threatened to rain misery all over us. I wanted to kick myself. He was older than Jungkook by four years. Thirty eight years old.
Did he have a girlfriend? Oh god, what if he was martried?
Nausea threatened.
“Your breathing sounds fine. Are you practicing those breathing exercises , I taught you?” He asked casually and I nodded . I couldn’t trust myself to speak.
“Hey...” He said gently and I flinched.
“I’m sorry.” I blurted out. “ I didn’t mean to lead you on or tease you in any way and I’m sorry if i came on to you ...”
“What?! Heejin, stop. That’s bullshit. You never did any such thing. This was all me.” He said firmly.
I stared at him.
“I know you’re married but... your marriage, its going to end right? Eventually.”
I made to step back but he grabbed my waist again, this time a few inches over my jean and his fingers on the bare skin of my midriff made me want to melt. He had long slender fingers, a surgeons hands, and the press of it on my skin felt so foreign and gentle and different and good.
“We don’t have to do anything. I just... I thought we could get to know each other. Over coffee or dinner.”
I wanted to sob at the unfairness of it all.
Because Yoongi was beautiful and handsome and so good and so much more than I could ever even dream of, but he was and would always be so intricately woven with Jungkook and with Jungkook’s life. And I couldn’t imagine anything more messy than sticking around and watching Jungkook and his daughter forget me and move on.
“It’s.... probably a terrible idea. “ I said roughly, shaking my head. “ Its the kind of idea that would never end well.”
“Are you sure? Because unlike Jungkook, i could probably make you cum.” He winked and I felt my face flame red.
“Oh God...” I hissed, stumbling back. This time he let me move away, merely chuckling and reaching for his coat and bag .
“I won’t bother you again. But the offer’s always open, yeah?” He smiled again. “ You need me to send over more pain meds?”
I shook my head mutely, begging him to just leave already.
He nodded and held his hand up in a casual wave before walking out of the door. I collapsed on the stool and dropped my head into my arms , groaning.
What had i gotten myself into.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn’t actually see Jungkook for a couple of days. The meds knocked me out and he worked overtime, only arriving after I’d slept off and leaving before i woke up. Jin brought Mina around everyday and there was something absolutely exhilarating about watching her clutch at her little teething toys and rattles, gummy smile peeking out every few minutes.
On a whim, i told Jin what had happened with Yoongi and much to my surprise he actually laughed.
“About time . He’s been pining for what three years now?”
I gaped at him, completely thrown.
“I..he.. what.” I couldn’t quite wrap my mind around what I had heard.
“He saw you at that art exhibition you put up in the Hyatt . By the way, don’t you paint anymore?”
I flushed.
I had no proper response to that. What could i say? That my painting had just been yet another way to control me, only appreciated by father when he could use it to make more money. And that part of my marriage contract included that I wouldn’t paint or make any money off my art for the duration that I stayed with Jungkook.
It was just yet another way my father reminded me that he controlled him. I didn’t fight him because he would win anyway. And the only thing he loved more than controlling people was winning battles that were always rigged in his favor. i wouldn’t give him that satisfaction. I would soldier through this awful marriage and at the end of it , i would disappear without a trace.
I shook my head vaguely and Jin hummed.
“Yoongi doesn’t understand art but he hung around the entire nine hours , morning to night . Three whole days of him just pretending to look at the artwork while secretly making moon eyes at you.”
I could only stare in sheer disbelief.
“i... i never knew.”
“How could you? Yoongi’s idea of courting is pretending he doesn’t exist and fading into the background. “ Jin rolled his eyes. “ He tried approaching your father to officially court you but your old man shut that down rather brutally.”
I swallowed .
“I... I’m sorry.” i said feeling foolish. Three years...what? I couldn’t think beyond the shock of the information.
“Does Jungkook know?” I asked , scared.
Jin shook his head.
“Like I said Yoongi never made it known . He was afraid it would make life difficult for you. He didn’t want any rumors around because everyone knew your father was looking to offer you to someone rich and young. Yoongi was what , fifteen years older? That’s quite a difference.”
“Thirty eight isn’t old.” I said sharply and Jin’s brow went up.
“Oh?” He questioned teasingly and I flushed.
“Jungkook is eleven years older. What’s another four more years?” I shrugged.
“You’re interested then.” Jin said thoughtfully. I recoiled, shaking my head quickly.
“I...what? No. No I’m not. “
“Why not? If it isn’t the age, then there’s no reason to say no. Yoongi is handsome , settled and a great guy all around and besides, your time with Jungkook is finite right?”
“I... I won’t cheat on him.” I said firmly. “ i can’t... I... besides, Jungkook and I... we’re... we have sex.” My ears turned red, “ I can’t do that with two guys... I’m not like that. “
Jin nodded.
“Its alright.. Heejinah ...I’m sorry if i pressured you or anything. You don’t have to do anything. I know you have a lot on your plate right now. Yoongi probably got carried away . More than likely he’s going to panic and avoid you for a year just to recover.” He laughed and I smiled reluctantly.
“He’s nice I don’t want to hurt him. “ I said softly.
“ Sometimes that’s just inevitable . People get hurt no matter what we choose.” Jin gave me a sad little smile. “ Jungkook is just as nice a gy as Yoongi. If not better. He’s just...not in the right headspace to show that side of himself to you. I wish you’d known him before Sooah. He used to be this...playful and funny kid. We all went out of our way to keep him safe. Sooah was just as amazing. Usually , we try to find flaws in people our friends date right? Well trust me Sooah was hard to dislike .” He laughed, eyes misting over as his gaze landed on her portrait over the mantle.
I followed his gaze and swallowed.
“Do you think Jungkook will ever get over her?” I asked simply.
Jin hesitated.
“Someday? Probably yes. But it won’t be easy. He’s ... He feels things deeply. He always has. He loved her deeply, he cared for her deeply and so its only obvious that he’s going to feel the loss of her presence very deeply too.”
I nodded.
“Its his birthday tomorrow.” I said softly. “ I have a gift for him. Well its not a gift from me, but a gift nonetheless. But I’m not sure if I should give it to him.”
Jin gave me a surprised look.
“What do you mean?”
I smiled bitterly.
“Just that sometimes fate can be very cruel when it chooses its players. I’m forever wondering if he would be better off or worse without me in the picture and I just can’t decide.”
“Different. He would just be different.” Jin said calmly.
There was nothing else i could say to that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yugyeom had rented out the rooftop restaurant in one of the poshest Hotels in Seoul and although the party was a pool party, I hadn’t bothered dressing for it. I wore a plain sequined top and burgundy skirt that fanned out around me knees.
The place was teeming with people his age , friends acquaintances and business partners. The women had changed into bright , skimpy bikinis and lounged about in the brightly lit pool tossing a ball around .
The older people were being hosted by the Jeons on the lower level of the restaurant in a posh ballroom. Jungkook and i would have to visit them later but for now I was content sipping a mocktail, leaning against the bar while Hoseok and Lisa flanked me on either side, pointing out who was sleeping with who.
Jungkook was in the pool with Yugyeom and Jimin and it was impossible to tear my eyes away from him. He looked happy almost, laughing and shaking water out of his hair as he moved around with the strength and agility of an Olympic athlete. Yoongi was in the pool as well and on the opposite team with Jin and Namjoon....and it was increasingly obvious that the half a dozen bikini clad women were there simply for an excuse to touch the handsome alphas as they worked up a sweat.
“Jungkook is such a competitive bastard.” Hoseok laughed. “But I don’t know what’s gotten into Yoongi today. i can’t believe he’s in the pool. “
“Of his own volition. “ Lisa added. “ usually someone has to strip him and toss him in.
Yoongi kept glancing at me every few minutes. It was impossible to miss. It was also impossible to miss that at least three of the six women in the pool were trying to get into his pants.
I sighed and turned back to the bartender asking for a refill. when i turned back around, Jungkook and Yugyeom were climbing out of the pool and Jin was moving to the opposite side to take their place with Jimin.
“Jungkook and i are going to go get a drink. Anything for you , beautiful?” Yugyeom reached out to touch me and I almost fell in my haste to get away from him.
“Keep your hands off me.” I snapped . Jungkook frowned.
“No need to be rude, Heejin , he was just being polite.” He said softly and i smelt the alcohol on his breath.
“Don’t drink too much Jungkook.”
“Oh come on, beautiful., Its his birthday let him live a little...” Yugyeom laughed and I glared at him.
“I’d rather have him live longer “ I snapped. “ And that can’t happen if you keep trying to give him alcohol poisoning.”
Yugyeom rolled his eyes.
“Is she always this dramatic, Jungkook-ah.” Yugyeom laughed. Jungkook didn’t laugh but he gave me a look that said, ‘ please don’t make a scene’ and I bit my lips.
I didn’t want to ruin his night. He looked ....so close to a normal person tonight and whether I liked it or not Yugyeom had contributed to that. The music was apparently Jungkook’s favorites only, the pool because he loved volleyball in the water and the buffet had all his favorite foods. Yugyeom had gone out of his way to make the party perfect and i suddenly felt like the troll stomping on Jungkook’s happiness.
Swallowing my own instinct to drag my husband away from the alpha who had his arms around him, I turned away and walked off to the pool. Yoongi’s face lit up when he saw me.
“Hey there, angel. Here to watch me kick some ass? “ He cupped his hands in the water, before tossing a handful of water at me. I blinked in surprise, laughing a little.
“I’m just here to cheer Jin oppa. “ I said impishly, moving over to the lounge chair near his side of the pool. Yoongi’s pout was adorable and I couldn’t help but laugh.
Maybe I could stop worrying about Jungkook for a while. Yugyeom wasn’t dangerous. Even if he got a little drunk, I was still here. So were all of our friends.
It would be fine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
it wasn’t fine.
An hour later, I found Jungkook in a room filled with cigarette smoke and light music, yugeyom and his friends scattered around the place with a few beautiful women lounging about on their laps.
“You said one drink Yugyeom...he’s completely out of his mind.” I said shrilly staring at where Jungkook sat on the couch , shirtless and laughing as some girl in a bikini ran her fingers up and down his arm. She had one leg draped over his thigh. I felt sick at the very sight of it.
its because he’s drunk , I told myself. He’s drunk and can’t consent, that’s why you feel sick, nothing else.
Yugyeom gave me an easy smile.
“Guy just wants to have some fun. Reina’s a friend of mine. She’ll take good care of him don’t worry. She’s the birthday gift i got him. “ He leered.
I resisted the urge to punch him in the face.
Glaring at him,
“Jungkook, we’re leaving. Come on.” I made to move towards him but a hand shot out, gripping my wrist like a vice.
“Not so fast baby.... I already paid for her. You can’t just waltz in here and take away her livelihood.” He sneered. “ Unless you want to take her place. This is a special bar you know. All these lovelies, they have something in common with you.”
I stared at him frowning.
“What does that mean?”
“I hired them from an omega escort agency...you know because that’s all you omegas are useful for anyway.”
I rolled my eyes, yanking on my wrist.
“You and your medieval ideals can go to hell. I’m going home. Jungkook!!” I yelled again and this time Jungkook turned eyes landing on me.
“Heejin?” He slurred.
“We need to go home, Jungkook.” I said firmly.
“Now?” He blinked. I nodded.
“Yes now.” I made to move away but this time Yugyeom wrapped both arms around my waist, pinning me to his body. Pain , sharp and unbearable shot up my ribs and I whimpered. He was squeezing too hard and God what if the cracked rib just snapped?
Panic began setting in and I yelped.
“Let me go you bastard.” I struggled to get away, staring in disbelief at my husband .
Jungkook was standing but he swayed dangerously. There was no clarity there and his eyes were hooded. He was drunk. Really, really drunk.
“Jungkook tell him to let me go!!” I yelled , trying to tamp down the panic that was rising up my throat.
“Don’t worry Kook. Just gonna ask her to wait outside for a while. Why don’t you finish your conversation with Reina.. i’ll entertain your wife for a while.” He drawled and i felt my entire body go ice cold at that.
Jungkook was blinking rapidly, the words clearly not registering and genuine terror began to bleed into my veins. Jungkook couldn’t even fathom that i was in genuine danger here, let alone help me. Oh God, why had i come alone? Where were the others??
Yugyeom held me tighter and i swallowed a groan . My ribs felt like they were on fire.
“Let’s take this somewhere private, Heejin?” He whispered into my neck and i couldn’t believe it. Yugyeom was drunk yes, but was this idiot also insane?
“Wait...no.. Yugeyom don’t be a fucking idiot. If you touch me, that’s fucking rape...You can go to prison for that .” I shouted, trying to drill some sense into his head. He wasn’t going to risk prison to make a point was he??
“Not if you seduce me angel...and you’re going to... Or I’ll just tell people you did...same difference , right?” he whispered.
And then he began dragging me off to the corner and my eyes fell on a side door leading out of the room .
If you let him take you there this is going to become frighteningly real, a voice screamed in my head and I inhale deeply, ready to scream loud enough to get the attention of everyone in the damned building.
The door opened just as I opened my mouth and I froze, watching Mrs Jeon walk into the lounge, looking lost.
“What is this place?” She muttered out loud looking around and the arms around me fell away so fast, I crashed to the floor.
“Heejin-ah!” Yoongi’s voice came from right behind her and I flinched, willing my shaking legs to stop trembling.
“Mrs. Jeon...” I muttered, voice strained and ribs throbbing.
“Heejin? What is going on here? Where’s my son?”
“Fuck... Jungkook-ah...” Yoongi moved to get him and I took a deep steadying breath.
Years ago , I’d taken a self defence class and one thing i’d definitely enjoyed learning was how to throw a punch. And It wasn’t something i’d forgotten.
Planting my feet firmly , i lightly rotated my hips, a subtle shift, before engaging my core , drawing all the fury and helpless rage inside me into my fist. I pulled my shoulders in and took a deep breath. Punch past your target , i told myself. You’re not just going to break his jaw you’re going to put him in the hospital tonight.
“Mrs. Jeon, Jungkook had a great time toni-” His voice was all i needed to hear to know exactly where his mouth was behind me.
i relaxed my muscles as i threw the punch, contracting them just as my fist landed on Kim Yugyeom’s face.
The satisfying sound of flesh on bone felt like music to my ears and Yugyeom’s sharp cry of sheer agonizing pain even sweeter.
He crashed to the floor in a heap and I could feel my fist throb like hell. I was going to bruise so badly. But it was worth it.
“That was for telling me that you were going to rape me and tell everyone that i seduced you.” I said calmly.
Yoongi let out a noise of disbelief.
“What the actual fuck.....” He shouted.
“Yugyeom what the fuck man? Are you out of your damned mind?” One of his friends yelled. Yugyeom merely groaned.
He couldn’t answer, blood trickling down his chin and hands cradling his jaw, whimpers falling out of his mouth. My own fist throbbed like hell so the damage had to be significant.
Mrs Jeon looked horrified and when she opened her mouth i quickly held a hand up.
“I’m not doing this. Not tonight. “ I said calmly. Jungkook was quiet, the way he always got when he was drunk and I groaned.
It was going to be a long night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“We need to talk.” I said calmly and Jungkook swallowed.
“Heejin, I’m -”
“Hear me out first Jungkook.” I said sharply. “ I don’t need your apology, it means nothing to me because it means nothing to you. You’re not sorry that you didn’t help me last night. You’re just angry that you had to help at all. You don’t give a fuck about me. I know that and I’m okay with that. What I’m not okay with is you getting drunk to the point that you don’t even recognize that someone’s in need of help. “
I took a deep breath.
“If you did it to me, you’ll do it to your daughter too. Yugyeom is going to get you drunk someday when you’re taking care of Mina by yourself and then when she needs you, what are you going to do?”
“You’re right... I shouldn’t have gotten that drunk -”
“I’m only here , talking to you , because of your daughter. If it was just you, I wouldn’t give a damn because you’re an adult and if you make your bed , you can just lie on it. It wouldn’t bother me. But Mina...she’s not capable of making the right choices. She need a father who can make the right choices, because whatever shitty choice you make, your daughter is going to be there along for the ride whether she wants to or not. You drive your car off a cliff tomorrow , she’s going to be there in the car seat laughing because she doesn’t know the consequences of your choices. “
I clenched my fists to keep my voice even. To stop myself from yelling.
“I have something for you. “
I grabbed the brown paper wrapped canvas from under the table.
“It’s a painting . Your wife commissioned me to make this a year ago when she got pregnant.”
He froze so eerily still that it made me nervous.
“At first , i wasn’t sure if i should be giving it to you because well... because i was marrying you ... I wasn’t sure that it would be right, coming from me ...because I was taking your wife’s place after all...”
i laughed.
“Now I know that's just bullshit. I don’t have a place in your life. I’m a nobody. This isn’t about me. This is about you. She told me back then that you were nervous about being a father. That was all she said. And she wanted me to pain this. “ I held the canvas out to him.
“You can see it. I’m going to go stay with Jin oppa for a few days. I want you to see it. It shows how your wife saw you. The kind of father she hoped you would be. I want you to see it and make a choice. You can either get the help you need. “ i took a deep breath, “ Or I’m going to tell Yoongi that you’re incompetent to be a father. He’ll file charges , “ I had to close my eyes to get the next words out, “ and you will lose custody of your daughter.”
Jungkook inhaled sharply, hands curling into fists on his knees.
“i hope you make the right choice.”
I wrapped both my arms around myself and walked out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author’s note. :
I’m so exhausted I’ll tag people tomorrow!
.@girlinthemikrokosmos @xius-exos @sugainfireslex @yunkichiee@kpopstudybee @ephyraaaa @peachoney9795 @ggukkieland @veronawrites @blr1004 @tinyhoagiepartylover @btsis7okay@squishyjk @itsdingdong @emmmui @honeeybunneey @yeonkiminnie
@just-me-and-myselfs @delicate-snow-flake @kpop-lore @beautifulvirgobutterfly @sumzysworld @btsmylife21 @teresaisla
.@melrosaeparker @taestannie @dchimminie @ meraki--life @somewhereinthestarss @mawwnsterr @kookiesbreaky @chimchoom
#jungkook smut#jungkook fics#jeon jungkook#bts fanfics#bts smut fic#bts smut#bts fics#bts#jungkook#bts scenarios
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I Know (Part II)
Pairing: Changbinxfem!reader
Genre: smut
Warning: mild stalking, stripping, phone sex???, mutual masturbation, semi-exhibitionism, a tiny bit of corruption kink, and an even tinier praise kink, switch!changbin, switch!reader
Words: 2.8k
Extra Notes: like I’ve mentioned in the last part, everyone is above the age of 21 (think senior year of college age), so thats that. I’ve also noticed that the lyric is not that related to the story, but oh well :’) anyways, hope you enjoy this
And baby, I know, I know whatever city you’re in, you’re still the boy that I’d pick…
PLEASE READ PART 1 FIRST BEFORE THIS !!
youtube
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This is no way representative of the way Stray Kids act. They’re nothing but references of character, and in no shape or form is this how they act. And I am in no way romanticizing or glamorizing any toxic behavior exhibited, they’re just stories that is meant to be read. Readers discretion is advised.
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Changbin’s calling me…
What in the world does he want to talk to me about in this ungodly hour? It wasn’t late, but it certainly wasn’t early enough for a call like this. I looked back at the window and I still see the curtains still closed, assuming he was out or maybe in another room. I answered and put the phone in my ear.
”Hello?”
“Hey, (y/n)! I just wanted to call to check up on you,” he said, “how are you?”
Damn, he only called for innocent intentions... Why is he so damn cute?! (y/n), you got two choices to respond back; you either respond give him a nice sweet response, or you give a sly yet friendly comeback. It can work—
“(y/n)?” The voice out of the phone took me out of my inner self’s debate.
“Yes! Yes! I am fine,” I said, embarrassed and mentally facepalming myself. This is not doing well, he already thinks I am a creep and a loser. Or maybe not, since its seems like I heard a faint chuckle and the word “cute,” followed by, but that could just be a figment of my imagination. “How are you?”
”Oh, I am good, just came back from hanging out with Chan and Han,“ changbin responded, there were shuffling in the background so he could be doing something while on the phone, but what is it? I wouldn’t know. I heard him and Chris mentioning a ‘Han’ in our conversation we had while preparing for my apartment, so that name is familiar, however the owner’s not. “You should meet him one day, I think you both will be good friends.”
”Woah there, you better take me to dinner first before I meet your friend,” I teased. Keep it going, (y/n), you’re on the right track, you’ve definitely caught him off guard, like you always do.
“Give me a place, time, and date, you’ll get that dinner, or maybe I’ll let Chris take you.” Changbin nonchalantly said, oozing confidence just by his voice. That bitch… Always makes it harder for me than it already is. As if he saw my blushing reaction, he began laughing.
“What’s wrong, princess? Cat’s got your tongue?” He said it in a low voice. Usually, I would gag if anyone—let alone a man—calls me princess, but with him, it felt different. It felt… arousing? No! No! (y/n), get a grip!
I rolled my eyes and laid on my back to be more comfortable, “What is it, Changbin?” I said, changing the subject, “What is that you wanted to call me at 10 p.m?” Yes, pretend like he didn’t just call you princess in the sexiest tone of voice you’ve ever heard. Totally would work.
”I told you, I just want to check up on you,“ he confessed but he also paused to say something further, “and also I am bored and I kinda felt like talking to you. I’m not wasting your time, aren’t I?” Although I couldn’t see him, he does however sound really sincere with his words. I don’t want to sound naive, but he sounded truthful.
“No,” I shook my head, “you really didn’t, besides I just got out the shower and was just scrolling through instagram.” I said, looking down in my nails.
”Oh, really?” He said, “were you going to sleep?”
”No, I stay on social media for a long period of time, I don’t sleep that easily“
”I see,” he said, but then he stopped talking. As the awkward silence has erupted between us, I started to think more about the first time I saw him and how I felt. While I thought it would be better for me to tell him later on and on person, but this balloon inside of me was getting bigger and bigger as guilt is inflating it. I sighed and started to speak, “Hey Changbin.”
”Yeah?”
“Can I confess you to something?”
”Tell me anything, doll, I’m all ears.”
Dammit! You’re not making it easier.
I bit my lips, “uhh,” I am glad he wasn’t looking at me, grimacing and slapping my head.
”You know hitting yourself isn’t gonna help,” as soon as Changbin uttered these words, my heart sank. My eyes widened as I got up and looked out window. His curtains were open, and it showcase a very, very pleasant show.
I see Changbin, sitting at the edge of his bed, facing me as his black shirt was fitting his form really well, especially with the semi-flexed arm that has his phone near his ears meanwhile the other arm was holding the elbow of the occupied arm. He was look at me straight at my eyes when we made eye contact, and fuck, was that an image to look at. As I looked like a deer going through a headlight, Changbin tilted his head in confusion, but he still had a smirk, “what is it you wanted to me?” he said through the phone.
”I-I“ I stuttered. At this point, I’ve lost all sense of dignity and my self thought, I am about to get called a creep by a good looking man I met not too long. Here goes nothing.
”I may have invaded your privacy,” I said, which caused Changbin to furrow his eyebrows in even more confusion, still having a slight smile to it. “What are you talking about?”
”Ugh, Changbin, I saw you half naked when apartment touring numerous times!” I yelled in frustration, as he kept pushing my button. I looked away, not bearing to look at him, as I closed my eyes out of guilt. “I understand if you don’t want to be friend, even though we met for only a week, but I just couldn’t bear the guilt that I—“
As I confessed, I heard a laugh coming put of the phone, I opened my eyes and looked at Changbin looking down, with shoulders shaking up and down. Now, I have the confused look that he had, “What’s funny?”
“Oh, princess, you have no idea,” He said, still looking down. Me still being bemused, he noticed my silence and looked up at my frowned face.
”I know…” He smirked, while my eyes were widened. Son of a bitch.
”W-wh-“
“I thought you knew that I’m doing all this on purpose, I’ve been trying to catch your attention every single way.” He leaned forward, placing both elbows in his knees, “I thought you were smart, only to be a gullible baby.” He whispered the last part, as I gulped at the last part. God damn, he’s so intense with his gaze. His eyes wandering all over me meanwhile maintaining a very dark yet exciting aura, which typically puts me off but now, I’ve never wanted to pounce a man so badly.
I smirked at him, the guilt I had had fizzled away, only to replace with arousal.
“So you’re not mad?” I looked at him, with innocent eyes, now laying on my side, facing him, as my robe slipped and exposed a part of my shoulder and the upper of my chest. He breathed in, as he was examining me, “no, why would I be mad at you?” He leaned back, as his head was thrown back, neck exposed, placing his free hand on the back of his neck.
God, is he so fine…
”I could never be mad at my precious baby.” He smiled a seductive smile at me, which made me riled up by rolling my eyes and looking up. “You like getting called that, don’t you?” He may have said it in a question form, but it didn’t feel like one, it was rather a statement than a question. “Hm,” I said, looking back at him, eyes half opened out of hunger for him.
We had an intense eye contact, where if it weren’t for the distant and the glass that is placed in front of us, we’d probably be all over each other.
”Has your hang out with Han and Chris worn you out?” I asked, decievingly innocent. Man, the power this man has over me is no joke. He scoffed, “so you’re just going to mention other men like that?”
Ignoring him, I got up, letting the towel that was loosely in my head fall onto my bed, and went closer to the window, “let me relieve you of your stress, if you don’t mind.” I shyly fidgeted on my robe belt. He looked at me up and down, licking his lips, “I wouldn’t mind, if you don’t as well.”
There’s nothing more sexier than mutual consent. (y/n), shut up, don’t ruin the moment.
I smiled and backed away from the window. I put my phone on speaker and put it on the side. I looked back at him, as I held onto my robe belt, he looked at me with a smile. I turned around with a slight sway on my hips, as I slowly undid my belt, slowly exposing my back at him, smiling as I heard a shuddering breath coming out of the phone.
As the robe completely fell off my body, being just in my underwear, exposing whatever secret flaws that has been hidden from the public. I silently gasp at the cool breeze as I held onto my chest, sensing my nipples getting hard. “Turn around for me, baby,” Changbin’s breathy voice echoed all over the room.
We may not be in the same room, and we maybe exposing ourselves to whoever is above and under us as well, but neither of us care. In our eyes, we only got each other, and we’re the only ones in existence.
I turned to him, letting go of my breasts and letting myself be bare, only to see him palming himself through his tight pants, groaning at his lack of full on skin-to-skin touch. It’s like he was waiting for me to tell him touch himself, which proved correct when he said, “please, let me touch myself.”
I smiled sympathetically, and also slightly astonishingly. I have never met a man with such switch like that. His dominating demeanor has faded and been replaced to a submissive cutie, which I obviously seem to admire very much. Pretending to thinking, I sat down, and looked at him, putting my hands behind me, “only if you give me a show too.”
I smirked at his state. He was disheveled, and adorned a beet tint all across his cheeks and nose. He looked beaten, but I loved it, and he does too. He put his phone on speaker too, quickly got up, and rapidly got his shirt.
“Ah ah!” I said, which caused him to freeze, looking at me, desparation was seeping through his eyes. Menacingly smiling, “slowly.”
Which he obeyed, surprisingly patient and sensual, I jokingly remarked that “he got dancer hips,” with the way he took off clothes while his hips moved in a way not many who can control their bodies can. He chuckle, “you should see how it works wonder,” his cocky attitude has made a comeback, which should piss me off but it made the whole thing hotter than it already is.
We’re both in our underwear, looking up at our eyes and looking down at each other’s half-nude bodies. Changbin wasn’t the tallest man I have ever met—not that it matters—, but he got many aspects that makes up for it, and its not just looks or personality. Just by the outline, I can tell that his little guy wasn’t little.
I propped myself with my elbows as I spread my legs, for him to see the wet spot that is stained in my underwear. He grunted at the sight, while I chuckle, “you like what you see?” I faux-innocently asked as I trailed my hand from my neck, making my head fall back, down to the valley of my chest, onto the waistband of my underwear.
“Fuck…” Changbin cursed, admiring the sight in front of him. He didn’t realize how lucky he was to see me in a state like this, not many have the privilege, especially not with men I met in a short amount of time.
I tugged my panties, took it off and exposed a part that he was dying to see, which caused him to gulp. He sighed with a smile, “god damn, (y/n),“ he shook his head in disbelie, “I’ve always thought you were gorgeous, but now I’m convinced you’re a goddess“
I giggle at his words, “and you, sir, are a demon disguised as a greek god” I teased back, tracing my two fingers around my lips, I noticed that he still was in his underwea. He still waited for my permission. How adorable.
”You can take off your underwear, Binnie” I didn’t even mean to give him the nickname, but I was too excited to even think straight. I looked at him, and saw him reveal his friend, and I gasped loudly, which made Changbin alert. “What? Whats wrong?”
”Nothing, its just,” I chuckle, “you have a nice dick.”
”Thank you,” He smirked as he sat down and looked at me, with full attention. I put my two fingers into my mouth, while maintaining eye contact. I then trailed my finger down to clit, which resulted in me letting out a blissful gasp. Meanwhile, Changbin was repositioning to a comfortable position as he began to touch himself, which caused him to let out a choked out groan.
”Binnie, as you touching yourself?” I half-whispered, but it was still loud enough for him hear along with my fingers movements that moved from my clit onto my slit, which made me moan.
”Ah-y-yes” Changbin groaned and nodded, as he was stroking his dick following the pace that I was going at.
After hearing Changbin’s groans, I began inserting my fingers at my slit, making me whimper in the process, “oh, fuck” I cursed, as I started to thrust my fingers in and out, noises coming out of my mouth along with the wetness of my pussy were getting louder, which excited Changbin, as his stroking was audible through the phone along with his beautiful groans.
“god, (y/n), if only I could touch you,” Changbin spoke through groans when he saw me fondling my breast and going faster. I was getting louder with my noises, in contrast of Changbin’s quite yet beautiful and audible noises. So much so, it sounds like Changbin was watching porn, rather than getting fucked at a distance.
“Ah-are-fuck-are you close?” Changbin asked through whines, his speech was getting difficult as he was getting closer to climax with his strokes going as fast as I was.
I nodded, out of struggle of speech, whining out, “Ah! Binnie!”
“Fuck, (y/n), I’m—“ Changbin grunted, as his strokes was started to get sloppy, he began to thrust onto his hands. I began to feel like something burning up in my stomach, moaning at the sensation, “Chang—I’m cummin— I’m cumming”
“Me too…” He choked on his words, as his groans and moans were also getting louder. Our phone voices combined was dirty but erotic, topped with the scene of two people masturbating to each other, now thats even a hotter view.
“Binnie!”
“Go ahead, baby... cum”
And just like that, I let out a squeal as I reached my peak, still playing with myself until I sensed an overstimulation. Not too long after, I was hearing a lot of grunt from the call and then I looked at Changbin, who ended up cumming onto his stomach, his chest raising up and down, letting himself catch his breath. Still out of breath, we both looked at each other, we both laughed at our fucked out state.
“Holy fuck, was that hot?” Changbin commented, taking the phone, putting it out of his speaker and back to his ear. I laughed at his sudden remark, nodding, “oh yeah, can’t wait to feel what you feel like,” I bit my lip.
”At least buy me dinner first,” He teased, referring to the remark I had at the time, which made me roll my eyes and him to chuckle. “You’re a dick,” I said.
”A big one, and a pretty one according to you,” He teased again. I started to jokingly groan at his words, causing him to laugh, “alright, alright, I’ll stop.”
I got up and picked the phone, looking at him, “I had fun, we should do this again,” him and I started exchanging a smile, this time it was more pure than the smiles we had earlier. He nodded, “for sure, but the next time is going to be in one of our beds, I really need to touch you.”
”The feeling is mutual.”
We began to talk a little more, until we both have felt that slumber was starting to sneak up onto our eyes. We both ultimately had to hang up, since we don’t want to raise our phone bills with our already long call. While facing away from the window, I couldn’t help but started admire Changbin in my head.
I typically hate men, but Changbin wasn’t just like any man.
He was Changbin, and I highly doubt that you’ll ever find a man like him.
#changbin fanfic#changbin scenarios#changbin smut#changbin imagines#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids smut#stray kids fanfic#skz imagines#skz scenarios#skz fanfic#skz smut
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Answering questions about Eagles 4x03–4x04 (Part 1) 🏒
Thought I'd do another one of these so I can try to answer all the asks I've received about the two latest episodes before the new ones drop!
I've gotten a lot of questions so they won't all fit into this post, which is why I'll also make a part 2. If you've sent in a question about the latest episodes but it's not included here, it will most likely be answered in the next part.
This question was sent in before the episode premiered, but you pretty much hit the nail on the head considering the scene we got in episode 4! I actually wasn't expecting a scene with Petra telling Elias about her past relationship with Mats but I guess he had to find out somehow.
I'm really curious to see if Amie will also find out about the relationship soon and what her reaction to it will be. I really enjoyed how Elias reacted by saying Mats was an idiot and then saying he wasn't like his dad. I think that's pretty significant evidence that Elias and Amie won't be a repeat of what happened with Mats and Petra.
Elias gets such heart-eyes whenever he looks at Amie and it's absolutely adorable. It was actually a little jarring to see Elias go from being totally head over heels for Amie to acting so aggressive when he got wasted at the party. I mean, I'm pretty sure he's still head over heels for her, but I don't think we've ever seen Elias behave like that before.
I hope that Elias's conversation with Petra means we'll get to see Elias and Amie find their way back to each other in the next two episodes. Even if that might be unlikely, this angst is already killing me!
Thanks for this ask @lovelygirlinbleu! I hope you're having a great day/night/morning as well. 💕
I don't think so, at least from what I remember! There was a scene in 1x06 where Elias and Felicia are watching a horror movie on Halloween and Elias has his "did you know vampires used to exist" monologue, but I think they were watching a different movie than the one Amie had on.
However, I do think we've all seen a variation of that scene where Amie watches the horror movie in some form or another—just maybe in a different show.
I thought the scene was funny so I'm definitely not complaining, but it's a pretty common trope to have a character be watching a horror movie and build up suspense to a minor jumpscare.
It reminded me a little of this scene from Mean Girls! It would've been hilarious if we saw Amie spill her popcorn like that too, because I've always found that scene so funny.
Elias is really adorable when he geeks out about stuff, like with the Norrsken movies! I can really relate to you saying you like Elias's lighthearted undertone, because that's one of the reasons why he's my favorite character.
Now that you bring up not rushing things with Elias and really exploring him, I'm starting to wonder if maybe this eating disorder storyline was introduced too late? I don't know, it's probably too early to tell and we'll see based on how the storyline unfolds, but I hope it won't feel rushed.
I have to admit, that was on my mind while watching the scene too! Otherwise it was really sweet, but I kept thinking that Amie should've at least thrown Elias in the shower first lol.
You're definitely right that the scene felt bittersweet considering Elias's problems, and it broke my heart when Elias said the whole thing was a stupid idea. But it was such a well-written scene overall.
Also, they really threw us for a loop by how they cut the "Then I'll break" line from Elias in the trailer. They made it seem like Elias would really be clinging to Amie, and then it turns out that Amie was the one who brought it up in the first place.
That was really clever editing on their part to cut out Elias's emphasized "then" in the trailer. In the trailer he says "Then I'll break", which made me assume that the whole concept of breaking would be Elias's idea. In the episode, where we get the full line and build-up to it, he instead says "Then I'll break". When the line is emphasized and in response to Amie claiming that Elias will break from his overworking, it totally changes the meaning of the line.
That's probably a tiny detail that doesn't really matter much in the grand scheme of things, but still! I wrote a whole post analyzing that line from the trailer only to be completely fooled lmao.
I hope it goes well too. But if I'm perfectly honest I would've preferred to not see Felicia in a romantic relationship this season, and instead just working on herself and not depending on other people for happiness.
This is probably going to be an unpopular opinion, but I just can't see any romantic chemistry between Felicia and Naima. I obviously knew the writers were building towards something with all the flirting, but an actual relationship? I don't really know. Their kissing scene felt strange to me.
Even if I did spot romantic chemistry between them, I feel like Naima wouldn't really be the right person for Felicia right now. I mean, we don't even know what caused Naima to end up in rehab. For her and Felicia to start a relationship when they're both right out of rehab seems like a recipe for disaster to me. I'm still not 100% sure about this storyline, but we'll see how things unfold!
I agree! I loved that Klara was immediately accepting of the relationship too. And now that you mention the detail about Amie hinting about her concerns about Elias to Klara, it got me thinking. This isn't entirely related to what you asked, but I'll write it down in case anybody's interested.
Maybe some people will disagree with me on this, but I hope Klara won't be the (main) person helping Elias with his eating disorder. That sounds bad, but hear me out. I definitely want Elias to get help, but I've noticed that the writers keep having Klara help people as a way to convince the audience that she's really changed and become a good person. I mean, she definitely has. But her character development should've come more organically instead of having Klara become this saint who solves everybody's problems.
So far Klara has helped Felicia after she attempted suicide, helped Ludde by taking him to the school nurse after he got injured and then helped him by (almost) reuniting him with Felicia, and also helped Amie with the contract. She even helped Mats and the whole Eagles team in season 3 by becoming their sponsor.
On top of all this she's a businesswoman at age 18/19, having no prior education about how managing a company even works. She's basically just learned things as she goes—all while balancing her studies and also managing to help all other main characters in some way or another. It's just a little too much, and that makes Klara an unrealistic character for me.
Anyway, back to your question! I think Amie's decisions really show maturity and that she's grown since season 1 and 2. She obviously loves Elias very much, but also cares a lot about his health and well-being.
I agree with you—I can't see Elias going back to train hockey in the US when hockey and elite sport in general has become such a destructive environment for him. My guess is that he won't be pursuing a professional hockey career by the time Eagles ends, and instead going to the US to pursue something else.
My personal prediction is that we'll see him follow Amie to the US to study at a university, with my guess being that he'll go to film school since Elias has shown an interest in movies. If he chooses to pursue a career in film, it would also make a lot of sense for him to go to the US (maybe Los Angeles?) with Amie.
It definitely wouldn't be healthy for Elias to go to the US to keep playing hockey. If that happened, I can see Elias thinking he needs to work even harder to prove that he deserves to be there and that would definitely break him.
I'm manifesting a happy Elias and Amie going to the US, with Amie getting a contract with Gabrielle and Elias going to film school. Imagine if Elias started directing Amie's music videos after finishing his education? That would be so adorable.
Same! I love all the Petra and Mats interactions we're getting in this season.
Petra really just appeared out of thin air in that scene, but it was fun to see her be so confident and straight to the point after all we know she's been through when it comes to Mats.
I think that Petra had a good reason to tell Elias to stay away from Amie, actually. She tells Elias that Amie has her career to think about, which is exactly what Mats ended up doing when it came to his hockey career all those years ago. My belief is that Petra was just reminded of her past experience and tried to be helpful to a young teenager who hasn't really got everything figured out. The dislike she harbors for the Kroons is obviously there too, but I also think Petra simply believes that pursuing your career trumps true love. Let's not forget that Michael also left Petra to study law.
In that scene with Elias, it almost felt like she was giving advice to her younger self. Petra isn't doing this to be malicious—she obviously just wants to save Amie from any potential heartbreak (and by extension, Elias).
Well, that's my take on it anyway. Coming from a very biased Petra stan.
Me too @lovelygirlinbleu! Things aren't looking too bright for Andreas right now, and they're probably about to get even worse when we find out what diagnosis he actually received. The scene where Andreas is singing about how his time is up and Sam is just sitting in the background looking completely crushed was so sad.
I definitely have mixed feeling about the scene where Felicia is crying in the trailer. She's gone through so much already and I just want to see her be happy for once. It wasn't just a regular crying seeing either—she looked absolutely broken in that shot.
This season really is bittersweet. I like what they've done so far with balancing it out with more lighthearted moments, so I hope they keep that up.
#eagles-translated asks#eagles svt#svt eagles#eaglesspoilers#ugh not happy with how the cover pic for this one turned out lol but the one for part 2 looks better
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First off, your page is excellent, and you almost always hit the nail right on the head. Thanks for saying the things that actually need to be said in this fandom. Now, for the mini-rant:
If your Zuko is…
…more principled and charismatic than Aang…
…more selfless and empathetic than Katara…
…more creative and romantic than Sokka…
…more intelligent and duty-driven than Azula…
…then congratulations!
That’s not Zuko. 🤡
That’s a totally made up character who you’ve given a bunch of positive qualities that there’s no evidence for him having in canon. 🤨
Seriously though, I like Zuko a lot. His nigh-ironclad egocentrism (which might be more relatable to a lot of us we’re willing to admit) is a unique trait that makes him compelling both as a conflicted villain and struggling hero—but just because I like the guy doesn’t mean I’m going to pretend he’s brilliant, sensitive, suave, or some paragon of virtue. 😑 Every character in the show has their flaws, but ironically it’s the protagonist whose ethics and motivation are the most questionable that’s made out to be perfect by much of the fandom. And honestly, I’m not sure I get it. Why is he put on a pedestal? Why has so much of his actual canon character been scrubbed in favor of ‘hello, Zuko here’ uwu and the soft Awkward Turtleduck? It’s gotten a little tiresome to see Zuko obsessed over—both by fans and the actual characters within fanfics and other ATLA media—when he seems hardly worthy of that. (And just to be clear, this is coming from someone who ships Zutara as well as Kataang, so it’s not as if my dislike of fandom!Zuko is rooted in that age-old debate.)
You are absolutely right about anything. It's only rarely which I see a fanfiction which features canon Zuko.
As for why fanon Zuko is so unlike canon Zuko, I've gone into this with more depth in the past, but I think it stems from six issues:
1. Zuko is a clear abuse victim, which leads to people to idealize him and treat him as a "perfect victim." This ignores that real-life abuse victims are often not "perfect, angelic" victims.
2. Zuko has a very compelling narrative, and that leads people to excessively adopt his perspective as the absolute truth. I think people often find his narrative the most compelling of any of the characters in ATLA and thus become fans of him. Moreover, we almost always see Zuko from his own perspective, and of course he looks golden from there.
3. The narrative frames Zuko in an extremely sympathetic manner from day one, and this leads people to ignore his actual actions.
4. People are generally uninterested in dealing with flawed and complex characters, and Zuko's flanderization results from that.
5. Zuko is male, and it's acceptable for him to be angry and violent, so people end up glossing over and ever forgetting that aspect of his character.
6. In general, people judge characters from their "vibe" rather than their morality, and Zuko gives off a "good vibe." People also tend to uncritically accept characters' explanation of their motives and actions, even when viewers should clearly look more deeply.
But yes, "awkward turtleduck Zuko" and "perfect, unflawed Zuko" are very annoying to see, because in many ways canon Zuko is a very interesting and compelling character due to his flaws. He has many good characteristics(although I feel ATLA's narrative didn't develop those well), and has a lot of room for very complex personal growth postwar. Yet those stories are never really going to be told, either in canon or in fanfiction, because the fandom has become so convinced that Zuko is "perfect."
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