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gojonanami · 6 months

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FIVE TIMES NANAMI WANTED TO PROPOSE BUT DIDN'T - NANAMI KENTO

✴︎ summary: nanami wanted to propose to you so many times - but it was never the right time, and then, there was no time left. ✴︎ contents: 18+ only, swearing, ANGST (major spoilers for jjk 120 (probably next week's episode, character death, exploration of grief, if you wish to avoid the major angst: stop reading after part 5), SMUT (fingering (f! receiving), oral (f! + m! receiving), panty sniffing, semi public sex, nipple play, creampie, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms), pet names (love, sweetheart), happy ending (sort of?) ✴︎ wc: 10,121 (i have a problem) ✴︎ song: the archer - taylor swift (blame laney for this)

One.

The first time Kento Nanami wanted to propose to you shouldn’t count.

And it won’t because it was when he first met you — enrolled into Jujutsu Tech along with the other first years, he first laid his eyes on you at a welcome party that the soon to be menace to his sanity, Satoru Gojo, had organized. Well, he could thank Gojo for one thing it was introducing you to the room — because he may have had to find the words to ask you himself. And he didn’t know if that was possible with his tongue in knots.

But he managed to talk to you — mostly with Haibara leading the conversation. You were reserved, at first, but he saw the spark in your eyes whenever you spoke about something you were passionate about — reading was one, one thing you both shared a love for.

“Yeah hauling my books to Jujutsu Tech wasn’t an easy feat, I had to ask Geto-senpai to have some of his cursed spirits help me haul it up to my dorm,”

“By the way, you still owe me lunch for that,” Geto smirks as he slips past, and the flush that settles on your cheeks is one Nanami wanted to see — again and again.

“Aren’t the upperclassmen supposed to buy lunch?” You grumble, pouting as Gojo interjected himself, resting himself on your shoulder with his arm, making you jump.

“Not here, here the kouhais earn their keep,” he grins, tilting his glasses down, “can you?”

And Nanami opens his mouth to reply, irritation creeping over his senses, before you brush Gojo off, “I’ll buy you lunch, but next time, if that’s what it’s gonna cost me, I’m going to have you two haul my books by hand up those steps,” You stick out your tongue, before your arms curl around his and Haibara, “let’s have cake,” you smile at both of them, gaze lingering on Nanami, “and we can exchange book recommendations?”

That was the moment he wanted to propose — could see himself living in a home with you, filled with both of your books lining the walls of a personal library, but your living room as well. He could see himself falling asleep beside you as you read to him, your fingers carding through his hair.

But no, no, it was irrational, he chided himself, as he talked to you, his lips curled in a smile that had damned him from the moment he saw it. He just had met you — he had barely been ever moved by another person, much less fallen in love. And it shouldn’t happen this quickly — it only happened this quickly in books — not in real life.

But you — he watched you and Haibara chat and laugh — you were someone that might just be the thing of books.

~~~~

Two.

The second time he wanted to propose, he didn’t care to remember.

And he barely did.

He remembers the facts of the mission. It was supposed to be simple — exorcise a grade 2 curse, simple enough for him and Haibara to handle by themselves. Not that they had a choice. Jujutsu Tech’s resources were already far too spread thin — Gojo himself being sent all over Japan and even overseas to handle things himself that no one should be able to. But their mission? It should have been simple — dangerous still, but simple.

But nothing was simple when it came to curses.

He remembers sensing the curse — the manifestation had frozen him and Haibara for a moment — their bodies taut with fear and adrenaline — but they couldn’t move. Even as the cursed spirit screeched before them, he couldn’t articulate what was happening — it was supposed to be a grade 2, it was supposed to be a grade 2, but no — this was a grade 1.

And then it struck — Kento barely had enough time to react, but he did, pushing Haibara out of the way when it did.

He didn’t remember much after that.

He remembered the squelch of Haibara’s flesh, the blood seeping through his clothes, the way his body crumpled on the ground, and he remembered the next moment was the first time he landed a black flash — stunning the curse enough for him to grab Haibara and escape.

But not enough to save him.

Haibara had made him promise if anything had ever happened to him — he would make sure his sister wasn’t recruited to Jujutsu Tech. And he had to make the call to his family — he couldn’t bear the thought of some higher up taking advantage of their grief to manipulate another into their clutches.

No, he couldn’t let that happen.

And now he sat in the morgue with his body, towel covering his eyes — Geto had come and went — and now he sat waiting for the body to be examined and taken away to be burned. Burned to ash with nothing left — that was the way all sorcerers bodies were disposed of. It was if they never existed in the first place - pawns in a never ending war that would have them piled like corpses on a sacrificial pyre.

What was the point?

Haibara had always told him — if there was something only he could do, he would do it. And for him it was jujutsu — but wasn’t there something else? Something else for him to do that didn’t let him up like this? A body on a metal slab waiting to be incinerated. What was the point?

Was there even a point? People lived and people died. He had lived and Haibara died, but he didn’t know why. Why or how do people live one day and disappear the next? He had seen death before but not of someone so close — someone so precious to him. And the chaos was too much for him. To be killed by another’s twisted feelings manifested into a monster — it was almost poetic if it wasn’t so fucking tragic.

“Nanami?” And he pulls the towel from his eyes, and sees you — your eyes glassy and red tinged — tear streaks you didn’t hide well left on your face, “Nanami—“ and you don’t know what to do with yourself — as you come to him, hesitating, “can I—“

But he’s the one pulling you into his arms, nearly into his lap as his fingers dig into the fabric of your jacket, “I’m sorry — I’m so sorry I wasn’t there—“ your voice breaks, and it’s enough to break him — he hadn’t really cried, not around another person, but tears well at your words, as your fingers card through his hair.

“You have nothing to be sorry for — I’m the one—“ and his voice breaks in turn, as the words stuck in his mind going round and round, until they were nearly had shattered his sanity and skull along with it, “I’m the one who couldn’t save him,”

And you pull back to look at him with tear stained cheeks, “that’s not your fault, Nanami—“

“How is it not?” His words are laced with more venom that he wishes them to be, a little more bite than he wished to chew, and the hurt in your eyes was enough to make him regret speaking altogether, “I’m so—“

“No, it’s not your fault, Kento,” and his eyes find yours, your lips twisted in a frown, and your gaze unwavering, “I know a part of you knows that — knows that…Haibara’s death is nothing but a function of this shitty system we’ve been funneled into. Nothing more. Nothing less. And you know,” your voice grows softer, “you know Haibara wouldn’t want you blaming yourself for this. You know what he’d say?” You almost chuckle, “he’d tell you not to sweat it. To keep going. That you got it, right?”

He gives a terse chuckle in return, shaking his head, as his head tilts into your chest again, “How do we—“

“I don’t know,” you murmur, you don’t need him to say more, “I don’t know how we do this without him, but we have to. We have to for him,” and your hand cups his face, tilting his chin up so he looks up at you, “together?”

And he wants to ask you then — ask you to marry him. He doesn’t know when he would get a chance. You were the only thing that made his life make sense — the only thing that made him feel okay, feel safe, for once. He was so tired of never feeling that way. And he had just lost the one other person who made him feel that way.

He knew you wouldn’t say yes. You couldn’t. You were both so young still, still reeling from Haibara, still stuck in this system that could kill either of you at any time. But still…wasn’t that all the more reason to do it?

But as you pulled him into another tight hug, he knew he wouldn’t last much longer in the Jujutsu world. He couldn’t — he couldn’t take another loss like this. He didn’t know if he could bear it. But as his tears wet your jacket, surrounded by you — your scent, your soft breath, your warm presence — he would try.

He would try for you. And his eyes slid to Haibara’s body covered by a sheet — and for him.

~~~

Three.

“After graduation, I’m leaving,” it was a late night, a couple days before graduation that he told you. The soft pitter-patter of rain was the only thing heard from int the silence before he spoke. You laid on the foot of his bed, reading a book, while he sat cross legged at the head of it, his eyes fixed on you.

Your gaze lifts from your book, brow furrowed in confusion, “Leaving?”

“I can’t be a jujutsu sorcerer,” his words are as plain as always, “I can’t do it. I’m going to go to college and pursue some other line of study—“

And you sit up slowly, putting your book aside, and he expects protests, expects you to convince him otherwise, expects you to try and stop him, but all you ask is one question, “are you sure?”

It catches him by surprise — as you always seemed to. He could anticipate enemy attacks, analyze their next moves five steps ahead, plan three routes of escape, and even predict what garbage will come out of Satoru Gojo’s obscene mouth, but you — you always could surprise him.

“I am,” he finally answers softly, “this society is shit, you know that. And these past few years have shown me that the difference I make isn’t worth the toll it’s taking, especially when I’m not changing anything,”

“Kento, you do make a difference,” your fingers find his, intertwining with ease, such ease he can’t help but think that’s what it was meant for, “you do — even if you can’t see it, I just want you to know, you do. For the people you help, even if you don’t see them, for the other sorcerers you inspire, and for me,”

And he chuckles, “even you?” And you roll your eyes, pouting — the same pout that makes him want to lean over and kiss you until your lips are utterly ruined.

“Even me,” you toss a pillow at him, and he catches it with ease, and you scowl playfully, “y’know i’m gonna miss you, but I’m not gonna miss that,”

“What? My quick reflex—“ and you smack him with another pillow and giggle, the noise making his lips quirk into a smile even as you laughed at him, hands covering your lips.

“What was that, Mr. Ratio? Your quick—“ and he’s tossing a pillow right back smacking you in the face, making his lips curl in a rare grin (though not so rare when he was with you—“

And you pull the pillow off, your face grim, “Oh, it’s so on—“ you’re tossing a pillow, but it’s only a diversion as you lunge for him, assumedly to mess up his hair, but he’s caught you by the wrist, his other hand around your waist as he’s gotten you pinned to the bed.

Time stops.

He’s breathing heavily, and you are too — from the rise and fall of your chest, but he can hardly hear anything over the blood rushing in his ears. Your lips part as you look up at him — you’re dressed in your sleep clothes, a thin tank top and shorts — and it would be so easy to lean down, let his palm slide under his shirt. He sees your eyes flicker down his body the same — climbing back up before pausing at his lips.

It wasn’t a good idea. He was leaving. You both were graduating. Who knows when he would see you again — yet, he couldn’t bring himself to pull away. Not when this is what he wanted for so long, when he wanted you for so long. But maybe he should — maybe it would be easier, he couldn’t ask you to leave Jujutsu Tech. Just as you couldn’t ask him to stay. He knew you would stay to honor Haibara’s memory, to carry on his legacy — the one thing sorcerers could do for their fallen comrades.

Sometimes the only thing.

And sometimes it was the only thing they couldn’t do.

“Kento—“ your voice pulls him from his reverie, as your fingers brush against his cheek, “are you going to hover over me forever, let me go, or…” and your teeth graze your lip, “are you going to kiss me?”

And he’s blinking, cheeks most assuredly flushing, as your fingers graze the back of his neck, and his mouth is dry, as he looks down on you.

But he doesn’t need to asked twice, as he leans even closer, delighting in how your breath catches, looming over him, “do you want me to kiss you?” And the telltale quirk of his lips makes you gape at him, drawing a laugh from him.

“I hate you,” you murmur, as his lips finally brush yours, swallowing those playfully bitter words with them — and your lips are even softer than he imagined, your fingers settling themselves on the back of his neck, brushing the hair that rested there.

And when he pulls away; his heart squeezes at the sight of your kiss ruined lips parted as you pant slightly, eyes fluttering open to look up at him as if to ask why did you stop? And he can’t help but smile.

“It’s too bad because I love you—“ the words slip from his mouth — but he doesn’t regret it. How can he? When he might not get another chance.

And he thinks his heart will stop at your silence again, the pitter-patter of raindrops ringing in his ears again, before your lips finally curl.

“You love me, huh?” You’re leaning up and kissing him, lips finding his again and again — and how is it that he’s already addicted? You taste like honey, and sunshine, and something headier — sending heat warmer than liquor throughout his body that only made him crave more of you, and you finally pull away, and you’re smiling, “good thing I love you too,”

And he can’t believe his ears, he can’t believe you love him too — all these years he thought it was one-sided, that he was deluding himself with all the times your fingers found his, your eyes met across a classroom with a smile, and the times he found himself falling asleep next to you all those nights neither of you wanted to be asleep, your arm curled around his.

But you did. You loved him. And he loved you.

And as your lips met again, he knew, he knew he still couldn’t ask you. Couldn’t ask you because he knew you maybe wouldn’t say no — and he couldn’t ask that of you. Not when it wasn’t what you wanted. Not when he knew you could do the good he couldn’t bring himself to do. And you would — because you were the best person he knows.

He loves you. And therefore he had to let you go.

But — as he lingered over you on his bed, his body hovering over his as he dragged his thumb over your red, puffy lips, before leaning down for another kiss —

He didn’t have to let you go this second.

~~~~

Four.

It’s years before he sees you again.

It wasn’t purposeful. Not exactly anyway.

It was just easier. Easier not to have to think of you still at the place he once was. Still fighting the same curses he would have been fighting with you. Still risking your life day in and day out. While he…he only had money to worry about. To think about. To obsess about.

Money. Money. Money. Money.

How was this somehow shittier than what the jujutsu world? He had considered going into a more humanitarian profession, but when his goal was to retire early, why waste time? If he wanted to help people…he glances at his phone — the one vice he allowed himself, a picture of you that you had sent him when you got promoted to Grade 1 saved as his screensaver — he could have stayed by your side.

No, he wanted to retire. Find himself a nice place to retire to — he hadn’t decided the exact location yet. Somewhere peaceful. With nothing but beaches and sky and sand and books for him to read, to reclaim his life page by page. But to get there — he had to slop through this shit work — making the rich richer.

The same in the jujutsu world, and the same here as well.

And it was one day after he had exorcised a curse from his favorite bakery’s worker, he had felt anything good — anything remotely good — in far too long. Your words rang in his ears — you make a difference.

Was he making a difference by lining the pockets of the rich? Maybe his sorcery wouldn’t change the world, move minds or hearts, pivot the course of history — but maybe he could have his own impact. And not feel like complete shit when he woke up every morning.

And he wouldn’t — he knew he wouldn’t — if he could just see you smile again. Even if he could just see you again. He pulls out his phone, staring at your picture. And maybe…maybe even more.

“Hello, Gojo? I’d like to return to Jujutsu Tech,” and he hears laughter on the other end, “why are you laughing?”

“Kento?” You drop the pen you’re holding, as he steps into your office. And your lips are parted in surprise, your eyes fixed on his, “what are you—“

“I’m coming back, to Jujutsu Tech, I’m going to be a sorcerer again,” and he knows what you’ll ask, he knows you’re going to ask why — you’re going to ask him if he’s sure. And he doesn’t know how to tell you except by saying it’s because of you.

But you don’t say anything, your chair screeches back as you get up, clattering backwards and suddenly as you’re running into his arms. Your face is buried in his chest, and he can feel the tears against his shirt, and his arms curl around you, fingers running through your hair, “I missed you so much,” you murmur, and then you look up at him, fingers tracing his cheeks, gingerly moving his glasses away, “you look tired,”

“I am, but I’m better now,” he’s murmuring — and how is it that you send him right back to where he started, right back to where you always send him. It doesn’t even take a touch — only a glance, a whiff, a second — “I missed you too,” he adds, “a lot,”

And you push him playfully, pouting up at him, “Could have fooled me. You barely ever called or texted me all these years. You talked more to Gojo than you did me,”

“That’s only because that flippant idiot won’t stop calling until I pick up,” he grumbles — Gojo was the last thing he wanted to talk about in his moment — his fingers caress your cheek, tracing the line of your cheekbone, “I wanted to talk to you — I did, I just, I knew if I talked to you, I might say something I’d regret,”

“And what would you regret saying to me?” You raise an eyebrow, and his eyes are sliding away from him.

Asking you to come see him, asking you to leave Jujutsu Tech for him, asking you to be with him — every question that he wanted to ask, but never could.

“It’s not important—” and your hand cups his cheek guiding his eyes back to yours, and he knew you weren’t going to let this go, “If I talked to you, I knew it would end one of three ways — one, I’d ask you to leave Jujutsu Tech; two, I’d come back to Jujutsu Tech; or three, you’d ask me one of these yourself — but I knew I couldn’t do that,”

And your brows knit together, “Why not?”

“Because it had to be our own decision — I couldn’t leave and you couldn’t leave, just because the other asked,” he murmurs, his gaze softening, “it wouldn’t be fair to either of us — or the other — to feel like the only reason we’re together was because of guilt or want for the other, not for ourselves,”

You consider his words for a moment, “I would have left if you asked me,”

“I know, and I would have come back if you had,”

“But we didn’t,” and your fingers cup his face, “you remember what I said to you that night that we kissed?”

And he swallows the lump in his throat, his heart rattling against his chest, “You said, you didn’t want to go further because it would only hurt more when we had to go our separate ways,” and your hand slides up his chest slowly, the other already resting against his neck, and his find their way to you — one hand holding your waist and the other cupping your cheek, “but we’re not separate anymore, are we?”

“I hope the wait was worth it,” you smile, as both close the gap, lips meeting again and again — and you taste the same, but even better somehow — and he’s only pulling you closer, lips curled in a smile so wide that he hadn’t felt in so long, so long.

“Always, when it's you,” he murmurs against your lips, before his lips begin to trail kisses down your jaw and then your neck, his teeth brushing against your pulse, pulling a gasp from your lips, “good girl,” And he feels your knees buckle against his and he’s walking you backwards into the edge of your desk, “is anyone left on campus?” and you’re shaking your head, your eyes flitting to the door, as he makes you sit on your desk, thighs parted for him to settle between.

“The door—”

“Locked,” he replies, drawing back only a moment to take in the image before him — your lips red and ruined, chest rising and falling as you look disheveled at best, sexed at worst, and your eyes — your eyes swirled with lust, half lidded and desperate for his touch— “didn’t want any interruptions,”

Just as he was.

His fingers draw up a strand of your hair and kisses it, and your lips part, “Kento, please—”

“Please, what, my love?” his voice is low and teasing, as his fingers peel back your jacket, pulling it off your shoulders, “you’re going to have to be more specific,” his lips find your neck, soft, wet kisses that has your body leaning into his, “I’m not a mind reader,”

“But you are a tease,” you pout, and he only smiles, leaning down to do the thing he always wanted to — he kisses the pout off your lips, moaning lightly when your lips part for his tongue, his hands dragging down your sides, as your fingers loosen his tie, “I think you will be doing overtime with me today, Nanami-Sensei,”

And he grunts, as your fingers free him of his tie, joining your jacket on the floor, “I’m not going to be a teacher, just a sorcerer,” his teeth graze right under your chin, nibbling, “so you’re the only sensei here — are you going to teach me what you’ve learned the last few years?”

And you toy with the top button of his blue button-up, “Oh, I’ll teach you, Kento,” and you’re starting to undo his buttons, as he busies himself undoing yours, “the question is whether you can handle it,”

“Beautiful,” he murmurs in reverence, and his fingers finally undo the buttons, sliding your shirt off your shoulders, eyes raking over your chest — sharp blue gaze lingering on the erect nipples poking through the fabric for your bra, “You’ve always been the one thing I can’t handle,” his mouth leans down, closing around one clothed nipple, while he teased the other with his fingers, and he delights in your gasp, the noise sending heat right down to his already aching cock, “but I’m willing to try, my love,”

“You still love me?” You murmur, as he shrugs off his own shirt, perfect abs teasing into a v-line, all this muscle hidden under his business attire — and you knew he still must work out, and he did. He did in case he ever needed to come back — come back for you.

“Who says I ever stopped?” His nose buried in the nape of your neck now, as his fingers teasingly snap the strap of your bra, “you smell so good, so perfect,” and his fingers undo your bra and it joins the pile of clothes growing on the floor, “there wasn’t a day I didn’t think about you — a night that i didn’t dream of you, that I didn’t want you,”

“Kento—“ you whimper, as he tugs at your skirt, a quick glance for your nod, and he slides it down your legs, bunching at your ankles until you kick it off. Your cheeks burn as he’s kissing your way down your body, his mouth teasing the other nipple he had neglected, trailing hot kisses down your stomach, until he reaches the fabric of your panties, “I need—“

“Been wanting to taste this for so long,” and he’s kneeling between your parted thighs, still calloused fingers parting your plush flesh, tongue flicking over his dry lips at the sight of the dark wet patch at the crotch of your underwear. And you look down at him, eyes glazed over with unadulterated lust that is almost enough to have him cumming in his pants, “so sweet,” he’s murmuring as he noses your clothes cunt, and you jerk, as he pulls the crotch aside, “wonder if you taste as sweet as you smell,”

“Kento—“ and his tongue drags over the length of your dripping cunt, nose bumping against your clit, as your thighs curl around him, pulling him closer, closer — “fuck—“

“Such a filthy mouth,” he tuts, smiling against your cunt as his tongue teases your folds, “almost as filthy as you are down here,” and his finger begins to part your walls, making your thighs shake and quake, his lips close around your clit, sucking.

You’re a mess of moans and pants, hips grinding against his touch, as one hand tries to muffle your moans, the other is curled in his blonde locks, “taste even better than I imagined — just f’me, only for me,” You’re so close, as he parts your folds with another finger, sinking knuckle deep, as his fingers brush against that one spot that has you parting your lips in a silent moan, head thrown back — and the heat deep in your stomach is going to snap.

KNOCK KNOCK.

You both freeze, your cunt jerking around his fingers, as you bite your lip — maybe if you’re silent, they’ll go away— but Kento clicks his tongue, a smile on his glossy cum covered lips, mouthing, “Speak,” and you gape at him, chest still heaving, as you shake your head, before he’s curling his fingers just right.

Fucker.

You hear Gojo’s voice, calling your name, “You in there?”

You swallow thickly, meeting Kento’s gaze — he’s not backing down, “Yeah, sorry I’m in the middle of something — do you need something?”

“I was just wondering if you heard from a certain salaryman, or should I say, ex-salaryman?” the very one that was burying his face back in your still sensitive pussy, slurping and licking, despite Gojo being right outside.

You have to bite back your moans, swallowing them as you speak, “You mean Nana—ah—mi?” And you feel the very same sorcerer smirk against your abused cunt, a third finger finding its way inside you, “ha-haven’t heard from him, and what do mean ‘ex?’”

You do your best at acting, but it’s hard when his mouth closes around your clit, sucking hard, as your fingers curl in his hair, biting your lip so hard, as he fucks your pussy in earnest with his fingers — how can Gojo not hear the nasty squelch of your cunt?

“He left his job. He’s coming back to Jujutsu Tech,” and he takes a beat, “I’ll take my leave,” and he chuckles, “have fun you two, and Nanami?” You feel your face flush, “don’t be too rough with her — we need our best teacher available to teach tomorrow,”

You hear his laugh all the way down the hall, and you’re covering your face — those fucking six eyes — but Kento’s tugging your hands away, “Pay attention to the one who’s filling you, love,” and he’s burying his face in your cunt, fucking you even harder — hitting that spot over and over, until you cum, back arching, as he’s pulling his fingers out to lap up the slick dripping from you, “delicious,” he murmurs, kissing your still sensitive clit, before he’s looking up at you — all fucked out, your chest rising and falling with every pant, your lips kiss ruined red — “and so beautiful,”

His licks his lips clean of your cum, wiping the rest with the back of his hand, as he rises to your feet, “Kento, please,” you’re murmuring, his hands slide over your body, squeezing your hips, “I need you,”

“What do you need—“ and his words are cut off by your fingers reaching for his buckle, the clink of the metal as you undid it, along with the button, tugging his pants and boxers down.

He hisses as his too sensitive dick slaps his stomach, your lips parting, eyes in a trance, “So pretty, Kento,” your fingers traces one of his veins to his already leaking tip, “and so fucking big,” you murmur, teasing the bead of precum on his slit, making him groan, “can’t wait to have this inside me — been waiting ten years,”

And he’s sliding your hand away, pressing his hips flush to yours, as your legs wrap around his waist, “That long huh?” And his lips find yours again, letting you taste yourself, “and I thought I was the only one pining,”

“So you admit you were pining for me?” And he laughs, as you smile up at him — like all the times he had hoped you would — “I had a crush from almost the moment I met you,”

“You could have fooled me,” he presses kisses up and down your jaw, drawing a moan from both of you as he teases your puffy clit with his aching tip, “I thought you had a crush on Geto,” and you scoff.

“Geto? So you were jealous of him — that’s why you always had that sour look whenever I studied with him,” you grin even wider, “well you had nothing to worry about - I had a crush on very gloomy boy and no one else ever caught my eye,”

And he softly smiles, and it seems to ebb away the years — the trauma and the tiredness — and left only him, your Kento.

“Is that right?” He asks before kissing you again, his fingers finding the back of your neck to deepen the kiss, as you moaned, muffled by his mouth, “I want—“

“I know, me too, please — don’t keep me waiting any longer,” and how could he refuse a request like that?

He’s sinking into you, thick cock parting your dripping folds until he hilts himself fully in you, his fingers digging your hips — and you’re so full, too full. And you’re perfect — perfect walls wrapped around him, so warm and so tight — it’s enough for him to neatly blow his load then and there.

But he can’t, can’t when he’s waited this long to do this. You’re whimpering, “S’good, Kento, too good,” your walls flutter around him as his hips shift lightly, “please, please move—“ his hands find your legs, lifting them higher to find a better angle, fingers digging into your soft thighs.

And his hips slowly thrust into you, edging you with his shallow thrusts, and you’re whining, “Kento—“

“Look at the mess you’re making all over your desk,” he’s guiding your gaze with two fingers on your chin, making you watch where his cock is sunk into you, “taking me so well, practically swallowing me, good fuckin’ girl,” he grunts, “want it harder? Want me to fuck you?”

Your desk is already creaking under your weights and the movements, you’re nodding wordlessly, lips parted, “Kento, please, I need—“ and you watched his cock pull out only to slam back in. Your head falls back, moaning his name again and again.

The squelch of your cunt rang in his ears over and over, as he grunts, barely keeping himself from cumming, especially when you begin to roll your hips into him, “You’re so pretty, and all mine — just mine,” and his lips find yours again, just as your walls flutter at his words, “like that? Like it when I claim you, love with my cock fucking you?” And his vulgar words only makes you tighter, and he grunts, “‘m close, sweetheart,”

“Me too—g’nna cum—“ and his dick reaches that spot right as his thumb bears down on your clit, teasing it in circles, until you’re moaning his name as you cum. Your walls clamp down, soaking his cock, a white ring of cum around his base as he fucks you through your orgasm.

His eyes meet yours as you do, watching your high overcome you, twitching and moaning — and he doesn’t last much longer. His hips stutter against you in shallow thrusts until he’s notching himself deep inside, groaning as he cums, hot seed painting your walls white.

“So perfect,” he murmurs, as he kisses your sweat slicked forehead, “so good,” and he’s grunting as he pulls out, watching your mixed releases trickle out, leaking all over your desk and onto the floor. He drags his cock over your weeping cunt, watching it flutter around nothing.

“Kento,” you murmur, gazing up at him, utterly blissed out as your lips curl, your legs slipping off his waist as he settles down on your desk, “I love you,”

And his heart squeezes — is he dreaming? He must be dreaming — because nothing in his life has ever been so good. So wonderful. So perfect. It didn’t happen for him — it never happened for him.

“I love you too,” he murmurs reverently, his fingers trailing over your jaw, “so much — you don’t know how much, darling,”

“Think you can quantify it for me, Mr. Salaryman?” And he snorts, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

“Don’t call me that,” he kisses your neck — you smelled so good, were you real?

“Then what should I call you?”

And he wanted to ask you then — ask you to call him your husband, to marry you, to buy that ring he had looked at from time to time when he thought about marrying you. But you just found your way back to each other — hell, he had just slept with you in your office, not even a bed. It was too soon, but — his lips curled — he was closer than he had ever been before. And he wouldn’t wait, he wouldn’t hesitate, not when it was you. He wouldn’t let you slip through his fingers.

He smiles, “Just call me yours.”

~~~~

Five.

Today was the day.

He was finally going to ask. That’s what he thought when he looked at you, still in bed, bathed in the dappled sunlight let in by his parted curtains. You were still fast asleep beside him, body curled up so your body was pressed against him. He ran his fingers through your hair gently not to wake you, “I love you,” he murmurs, as opens his bedside drawer, pulling a ring box and notecard from it — and he stares at it.

He’d ask you. He would ask you to marry him — finally take you on that vacation to Malaysia you both had talked about for too long, read all the books you both had put off, and lounge on the beach — and do much more in your hotel room. And then maybe, maybe he could ask you to retire from jujutsu.

He had always promised himself, promised that he wouldn’t be a sorcerer when he got married. He couldn’t bear the thought of leaving a family behind to mourn him — but even more than that, he couldn’t bear the thought to lose you, to call you his wife, call you his soulmate — and have you fall away from him.

He would rather be the one to die.

But this way — he rises, grabbing his clothes for the day, and slipping the ring and the note into his coat pocket — neither of you would have to worry about losing the other. At least to a curse.

“Where are we going?” You giggle as he drags you along the street, packed with people, more than usual. He keeps you close, an arm wrapped around you, especially for a Wednesday evening. What date was it? He had seemingly lost track of everything he had planned.

“It’s Halloween,” you remind him without him asking the question, “explains all costumed people and the packed streets — we should definitely avoid Shibuya — the crowds there would be insane,”

“How’d you know—“ and you tap his forehead with a smile.

“I could see your gears grinding, Kento,” you smile, resting your head against his shoulder, “and it’s just like you to forget it’s Halloween,”

“Is it?” he chuckles, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “well good thing I have you to remind me,”

“Very good thing, and I have you to remind me about everything else,” and he nods, and you elbow him, “you don’t have to remind me of that much!”

“You were leaving the house yesterday and you forgot your wallet, keys, and purse — you almost forgot to put on shoes—“ and you’re covering his mouth his your hand.

“How about you remind me about where we’re going?” And he smiles against your hand, before kissing it gently, pulling it from his lips and kissing the back of your hand as well, making you flush.

“Why ruin the surprise��” and then both of your phones ring — the two of you share a dark look, glancing at your phones and seeing the same message — Emergency: veil has fallen over certain areas of Shibuya. All available sorcerers report.

“I guess we are going to Shibuya,” you sigh, running your fingers through your hair, “we should—”

“We should stop by the apartment — we both left all our equipment there and I need to change,” and you nod, as his fingers toy with the ring box in his pocket, a sigh stuck in his throat. When will he ever get the chance to do this right? Finally, he had worked up the nerve and this—this had to happen.

“Hey,” you cup his cheek, a soft smile on your face, “I’m sorry our plans are falling through, and just when I was going to make you give up this secret surprise,”

His lips curl, as his arm pulls you even closer, “I don’t recall agreeing to give up any secrets,” and you lean up and kiss him, soft and sweet quickly turning heady — neither of you were ones for public displays — but for some reason, it just felt right. And you part, breath warming his lips with a wide grin.

“Oh, you would have,” and he laughs, squeezing your hips, as he rests his forehead against yours, “We’ll pick this up right after we deal with this problem.”

He nodded, leaning down to kiss you again and again, his fingers still toying with the box in his pocket. And he wanted to ask right then, just drop to his knee in the middle of this packed street full of costumed weirdos and freaks, mission be damned, jujutsu be damned — but he didn’t want to do it like this.

He wanted it to be a time where both of you were safe, where you could celebrate without the fear of danger beating down your necks, where he could talk to you, hold you, kiss you — without fear it would be the last. Because he always wondered when it would be the last. But it wouldn’t be — he’d do anything to make it back, to finally take that step with you, the one he’d been waiting for over ten years to take. Take that vacation you both wanted with his ring on your finger, and retirement from Jujutsu around the corner.

And he squeezes your hand, “Promise?” and you lean into him, pulling him along the street back to your shared apartment.

“Promise.”

~~~

He wouldn’t be able to keep his promise.

That’s what kept repeating in his mind with every step he took. He couldn’t really feel much — not anymore. That special grade curse had burned him — burned half of his body to a crisp, he could barely smell the burning flesh anymore. All he could do was keep moving. Moving. Moving. Moving.

But he didn’t want to move anymore — he was tired. So tired. He couldn’t feel much, but he could feel the weight of having to keep going, even if he didn’t want to.

And now, he stands before a swarm of…curses? Transfigured humans? He didn’t know — he could barely see at this point out of his one remaining eye — he could barely keep it open, still drooping even as the monsters loomed before him.

“Malaysia…Yeah, Malaysia…Kuantan would have been nice,” the recommendation he had gotten from Mei Mei when trying to decide on a vacation for you and him to take — who better to ask than the woman with all the time and money in the world, a little brother who’d take her anywhere she wished. You both had settled on Malaysia, still panning out the details of when, but he had planned to surprise you with open ended tickets for the both of you — paid extra for them, in case something came up.

He almost chuckles. Something always came up.

Maybe if you both had liked it enough, he’d have a private home built for the two of you — with the little library nook you always dreamed of having, finally getting around to reading the countless books you both had bought and never read, go through page by page and take back the time you both have lost.

But right now each step felt like an eternity as he walked.

Where was he going again? Oh yes, to help Fushiguro. And what about Naobito and Maki? What had happened to them? There wasn’t much he could do about that.

Tired. He was so tired. I’ve done enough, haven’t I?

Hadn’t he done enough? He thought he had done enough when he left — left it all behind like a nightmare he didn’t care to revisit. Left the loss, the pain, the anger — the curses really — all behind him, in exchange for another set — greed, money, power. What was really the best option? Had he made the right choice?

But then he thought about you.

Your smiles, your touch, your kisses, your laughs — all the times he spent with you — slow mornings spent reading the paper together over coffee and toast from the bakery you always went out of your way to buy his favorites from; lazy evenings spent watching movies or reading, your legs intertwined as you did, his arm around your shoulders, until you plucked the book from his fingers made it so you were only thing his eyes were on; and sleepless but perfect nights spent in each other’s arms. The many times he wanted to ask you — the one question he never got to ask you still burned on the tip of his tongue like a curse unspoken, and he knew if he spoke it now, it would be one.

And so he did what he did best, he dispatched the curses, quick and easy. And his lips curled despite himself — at the thought of you. He could almost feel your lips on his still from earlier, the sweet scent of you instead of the smell of blood or burning flesh, he could almost see you too.

A hand rested on his chest, stopping him in his tracks.

Mahito stared back at him.

Oh. Oh.

It was over.

I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m sorry I can’t keep my promise. I’m sorry I can’t propose. I’m sorry I can’t marry you. I’m sorry I can’t have the life we wanted. I’m sorry I came back only to leave you with the worst curse of them all.

“I didn’t know you were here,” Nanami says, staring back at the curse — and it reminds of that time — that time Mahito had him in his domain, he truly had resigned himself to death. Resigned himself to die — and then Itadori had come crashing in, crashing in as he did his life, saving him. Saving him by not only by his very existence as Sukuna’s vessel, but by just his sheer strength.

That kid had really grown on him — he didn’t want him to. Not when he had the same positivity, the same smile, the same kindness…as Haibara. It was illogical. He wasn’t Haibara — he was Sukuna’s vessel, and he wouldn’t acknowledge him, he wouldn’t until he proved himself. But he’d protect him, and he would do what he could. Because being a child isn’t a sin — but perhaps, being a jujutsu sorcerer is one.

“Yup. The whole time,” Mahito replies, lips upturned in a slight smile, “Wanna chat? We go way back, after all,”

Nanami’s eyes shift to the floor, the muddied and bloodied tiles underneath his feet — he didn’t care to divulge his deepest feelings to a curse. There were only two people he could talk to about this — and one of them, he supposed, was now closer to his being than the other.

Haibara, what the hell was I trying to do? He asks in his mind, not even daring to say the words aloud, I ran. Even though I ran away, I came back with the vague reason of finding the work worthwhile.

And then he sees him. Haibara appears in front of him, patented smile on his lips, as he points south — points right at—

“Itadori,” Mahito says, his eyes narrowing.

“Nanamin!” his eyes wide as he takes in his state — oh, he had hoped no one would see him like this, much less Yuji. He had already been through so much, so young — hell, he had already died once. He didn’t deserve to see this. He didn’t deserve to grow up like this — to have his youth ripped away. But, did any of them deserve it?

It was a marathon, a marathon that they found themselves in that headed only towards a pile of corpses — but each time, they had to pass the baton before they stopped.

Could he finally stop?

He had dropped his baton so long ago, dropped and left the track, but he knew it would be picked up by another and another and another — but it was his baton, his baton that Haibara had handed him before he died in his arms.

No, Haibara. That’s not right. I can’t say that to him. It’ll just end up becoming a curse for him.

But it’s a curse every jujutsu sorcerer had to bear — made to bear until there were either no curses or no sorcerers left.

But he couldn’t regret it now.

“Itadori,” his lips curl, smiling for the last time, “you’ve got it from here.”

He couldn’t keep his promise to you — but he kept his one to Haibara.

And you’d pay the price.

~~~

This wasn’t real. Was it?

You stood outside your shared apartment with Kento. Finally a stop to the fighting for a month for everyone to train — enough time for you to retrieve some cursed weapons you had left behind — not knowing the fight would drag on for this long. You had considering sending someone — maybe not Ijichi but someone else to retrieve them, but right now, you couldn’t bear the thought of someone else rifling through Kento’s things. Moving the things that he had placed just so — the last remnants of his life, the marks he left that proved he was there, that he lived — that he had lived.

Lived. Past tense. And now you were still living — living in a world without him.

You inserted your key and turned the lock, opening the door. And it did, just like it had every day. Each day you’d open it — sometimes before Kento, other days after — but each time, there was always a meal Kento had prepped or bought waiting for you.

And this was the first time that there wasn’t.

Not only a meal — there was no one waiting for you. Not here.

You closed the door behind you — no longer a home, just an apartment. You needed to remember the things you needed, your mind was nowhere to be found, and fled the country when you had heard the news. You didn’t cry. Not at first.

Yuji was the one to tell you. He shouldn’t have been the one to see it. You knew it haunted his dreams, you knew he blamed himself, you knew — because Kento had done the same. So you hugged him, let him cry silently into your shirt, comforted him the best you could — because you knew that’s what Kento would have wanted.

He loved Yuji — he loved Ino too, and the other students all held a special place for him, but Yuji — Yuji was a special case. You knew that from the moment he had spoken about him.

“Gojo wants me to mentor Sukuna’s vessel,” he told you one night in bed, having returned from a mission and having a drink with Gojo — not a real drink, Kento had clarified, since it had no alcohol in it — but a drink nonetheless.

“He has a name, Kento. Itadori. He’s sweet,” you smile, you had met him and all the other first years from teaching, “he’s a good kid — very new to all of this, but he has a good heart and some good skills under his belt.”

“A vessel for the ticking time bomb has a good heart? Glad to hear it,” he sighs, running his hands through his hair, “I don’t know — he was a normal kid two minutes ago, and now he’s running around with Gojo feeding him Sukuna’s fingers every second,” he leans back against the headrest, “what am I supposed to make of this? I’m not even a teacher,”

“And what have you been doing with Ino?” you raise an eyebrow, “that kid is constantly after you, dogging your every step — he looks up to you. “And I know a lot of the other students do too, the ones that know you,”

“It’s—”

“You should do this. It would be good for you,” and he’s hesitating, “Yuji needs a sorcerer to guide him — teach him the basics that Gojo has neglected to do, and show him how a proper jujutsu sorcerer who isn’t…a special case like Gojo, operates.”

Kento’s lips curl, “You know you can call him a moron,”

“Why call him that when I have you to call him that for me?” you snort, “now what do you say?”

And he eventually agreed — and it was the best decision for him. It gave him more purpose, more drive — he seemed even more fulfilled — the most you had seen him professionally fulfilled in quite some time.

“You got it from here.”

His last words to Yuji. You almost have to scoff at the poeticness of it all — the same words Haibara had told him. The ones he hadn’t told you for nearly a decade, until one night he had told you what he said.

“And why didn’t you leave any words for me, Kento?” you ask the empty apartment before you, “for so long, we didn’t have each other — we couldn’t. And we finally find our way back, we finally do all the things we said we would — you’re gone, again,” your voice breaks, “I wish, I wish you were here. I wish I could see you. I wish—” and you break off.

There’s no point for wishing for things that can’t happen. You had things to do, and little time to waste. You needed to get stronger too. You needed to be useful. You needed to fight. You couldn’t tarnish Kento’s memory, or — you look at a picture that you had taken of him and Yuji a few days before outside a convenience store you had stopped by after a mission — his legacy.

You searched for the things you needed, placing them in cloth bags and then paper bags for easy and inconspicuous transport, but you needed to label them. You searched your apartment for a pen — but apparently you had misplaced every single one that you had — where the hell were all the pens? A question you’d usually ask Kento and he’d produce one from thin air. No matter what you lost or what you needed — he had it.

He always had it.

If he did always have what you needed, then maybe…you walk into the bedroom, over to his nightstand — he often kept a notebook for thoughts and notes in his bedside table so maybe—-

And there it was — a pen, but it wasn’t the pen that made you pause — it was the two things beside it.

A notecard and a ring box.

A ring box.

Your hands shake, and you almost want to close the drawer. Forget you say anything. Continue with the work you’re doing. It would hurt less.

But you can’t. You can’t.

You reach for the notecard first, fingers shaking as you gingerly pick it up — and you can tell this wasn’t the first he had written on. You could see the indentations from his pen, this card underneath the others as he had wrote. But his handwriting was neat, yet messy at the same time — his patented half print, half cursive scrawl that he hadn’t left.

Your legs buckle and you sit down on the edge of the bed — the side he used to sleep on, his arm wrapped around your waist, face buried in your back, his lips brushing against your skin when he finally stirred. And now it was empty.

My love, you don’t know how long I’ve wanted to ask you this. I’ve thought of ways to ask for years — I had to write it down just so I didn’t mince my words or ramble — you know I’m not one to drag out conversations. I love you. I’ve always loved you from the moment I met you — I know you’d tease me for pining for you, but I did pine for you and I’ve pined for you every second we’re apart. The other times I’ve wanted to ask you, the timing never worked out. But we have the time now, don’t we? Will you do me the honor of being your husband? I’ll spend every second making you happy, because that’s what you deserve, sweetheart. Only the best.

And your tears splatter against the corner of the card, before you put it down, as you let your sobs overcome you, screams you didn’t know you were capable of making— you didn’t even realize it was you, until your throat began to ache.

Why? Why? Why?

It wasn’t real, this wasn’t happening.

And your fingers reach for the ring box now, opening it only to feel more tears well — it was the ring you had showed him. One you had showed him one late night when it had showed up somewhere or another — you hadn’t even thought about the ring again. Until now.

You can’t bear to touch it. You can’t. Not when he wasn’t there to pull it from its box and slip it onto your finger. And he never would be. Not until you saw him again — one way or another.

You snap the box closed, tears slipping down your cheeks as you placed the box and card back into the drawer — noticing something else underneath — a printout? And you pull the papers out, scanning it.

You almost sob. A trip to Kuantan, Malaysia. The trip you two had talked about for months, but never had gone on. The trip was more for Kento than it was for you — and it was for you, in a way, because what you wanted the most was to just be with him. Time was all you wished for with him — all you wanted — but you knew you could have spent every moment with him for the last ten years and it wouldn’t have been enough.

It would never have been enough.

“I miss you,” you speak to the ghosts that fill your mind and haunt your dreams — Kento and Yu, “I hope you’re at peace. I hope you’re lying on a beach somewhere, reading the books you wanted to read, drinking an expensive drink, and eating the bread you love — I promise, I’ll find my way to you, someday,”

And you place the things back in the drawer, and shut it.

For now, you had other things to do. Other people to protect, other curses to exorcise. But — you stare at the picture of the two of you on your nightstand — his love was the one curse you could never give up.

Many months later.

You take that vacation he wanted. Packing the books he always wanted to read. Pocketing the ring he wanted to propose to you with. You’d pack a few shirts of his to wear on the beach, and maybe he would be lying beside you in spirit. You would find that beach he wanted to take you to — the one he had written down and had looked up several times while booking your trip.

You kept the seat beside you on the plane empty but you ordered a glass of wine and a sandwich for him regardless. You know you would have ended up ordering because he likely would have fallen asleep — old man he always was. And if you didn’t know better, you’d think he was sitting in the seat beside you.

He wasn’t dead. Not really, you think as you sit in the beach in one of his deep blue button ups thrown over your swimsuit, reading one of his books page by page, taking back the time that was stolen from him with your own — minutes and hours and days you’d wish you could take off your own and give to him.

He was alive, he was alive as long as you were, as long as the people who he was important to were alive. And he was alive — alive in your head and your heart and your very soul.

You read his proposal aloud as the sun sets, tears slipping down your face as you slip his ring onto your finger. And there it would stay.

Stayed all the seconds, minutes, hours, days, and years you lived -- lived in the house you built in Malaysia when all was said and done for you in the jujutsu world, just as Kento had wanted. Stayed until you finally saw him again. Saw him standing beside Haibara, softly smiling behind him, as your eyes fluttered open as he greeted you. Lips curled in that same smile that damned you from the moment you saw it.

“Don’t keep me waiting, love,” he smiles, the same words you had said to him, “we’ve both waited long enough, haven’t we?”

But neither of you had to wait anymore — as you run into his arms, warm and made of flesh and blood and real, so real — you had forever now.

✴︎ a/n: first, i'm so sorry lol. i don't know how the spirit of gege possessed me but i decided to inflict some pain. i have to thank @laneysmusings for proofing this for me and having to endure this pain. I also want to credit @/tempenensis for their post on haibara / jjk 120 that helped inspire/inform the third to last scene (but they don't like self-insert so i am not gonna tag them, but you should check out their tumblr!

✴︎ taglist: @your-local-simplol, @renawithane, @grooveandshit, @aemondseyesocket, @nitskilanara, @yunchans, @ackermanbby, @luminouslateralup, @multi-fandom3, @idktbhloley, @minteaful, @malleusmybelovedd, @lighttism, @lemonpoppy-seed, @nitskilanara, @wshwshi, @rreborn, @reyy-chanx, @kiradoki, @uroldall, @madam-milf, @elusivemoon

#sab [mlist]#nanami kento x reader #kento nanami x reader #nanami smut #kento nanami smut #kento nanami x you #jjk smut #jjk x reader #nanami fanfiction #kento nanami angst #jjk angst #nanami x you #nanami x reader

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exbeaut · 2 years

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I’m rereading mister impossible and it’s so funny reading my annotations

#I just kept writing fuck you bryde and I hate you bryde LMAO #and I also was writing my theories of who he is my main one was that he was glendower which I still think would have been sick as fuck #I mean I did like the reveal at the end but like it left me so confused and I desperately need it to be October 18th already #confused may be wrong word bc I get it like to me it’s his daddy issues manifesting lmao same way he dreamt Matthew without realizing u know #but I’m just like??? where tf do we go from here wtf is gonna happen #the part in this book where Declan is thinking like ronan doesn’t need a father figure...probably #but it’s like yeah he does lmaooo my poor child he had gansey replace his dad basically and now gansey left so here’s bryde to take over #but fuck like??? what IS GONNA HAPPEN HOW WILL THIS ALL END I NEED TO KNOW

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itsravenbitch · 1 year

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how i revised my boyfriend’s mother’s death

a little backstory

— for the sake of privacy, we’re gonna say my boyfriend’s mother’s name is kay

kay’s “death” was caused by a car accident (wasn’t her fault) and she later passed in the hospital. this all happened in new york, and my boyfriend and i live in georgia. but about a 2 days after we found out, we flew out there.

my bf and his mom were super close so that loss was a lot on him. he started burying himself in the gym, sleep, work etc & eventually he became really depressed. he would not get up out of bed and i could not take that. that was when i decided to revise her death, and this was like a week after she passed.

the moment i learned she was dead, i naturally entered the state of loss. so, i simply and quickly went over what state of mind i was currently in, and what state of mind i needed to be in.

now y’all know i love meditating <3 so ofc i meditated. the one i used is by edward art, i believe i’ve mentioned it before. but here’s the link 😌💘

so yeah after this meditation i had completely satisfied my imagination, i had a great feeling of serenity, and i was in the state of the wish fulfilled. + i let go of any need to control the 3d.

— reminder: don’t look at your 3d as something to change. things change when they change in consciousness/imagination. if you wanna manifest something, don’t point out your current circumstance as something that you need to change. be cool and fulfill it in imagination;)

— also sn: my boyfriend knows about the law but he doesn’t necessarily study or consciously use it. so, i didn’t tell him i was revising his mom’s death.

— and i had to continue to act like his mom was actually dead when i was around him, even tho at this point kay was 100% alive in imagination.

so in the morning, i would wake up and assume the state of fulfillment. throughout the day, when i would go check on my boyfriend, he always expressed his feelings, how i could help, and new ways he was trying to cope. honestly, seeing him so hurt and confused hurt me. and throughout this, one of the few things i always reminded myself was that, i’m not my emotions and i’m my thoughts, and neither of those things matter (in terms of manifesting).

another thing i always reminded myself of was the fact that i’m god, BUT i’m also human. so, the ‘god me’ was relaxed & satisfied. the god in me also didn’t have a hurting boyfriend with a dead mom. but the ‘human me’ did and he needed my comfort.

so that’s what i did, i comforted him because he was grieving the death of his mother. so what? i’m human, and i have human decency so ima comfort my baby.

HOWEVER, i didn’t attach myself to that (accept it). i didn’t look at me comforting him as “his mom’s dead and that’s final”, i just did it because he’s my bf and he’s hurt. but i still maintained fulfillment in imagination.

— i talk about this more in depth here. but basically the post acknowledges that yes, you’re god, but you’re also still human and you have a human life to respond to. so do that, respond to your life (when necessary) while simultaneously fulfilling the inner man.

as long as you continue to return to the state and fulfill SELF, you will manifest whatever it is you’ve fulfilled.

when it manifested

the night before it manifested, my bfs dad asked everyone (the family) over for brunch. just so everyone could be together during rough times and whatnot.

the next morning when we woke up, my bf.. it was like he completely reverted; he just went back to his regular self. i made sure to take a mental note of it.

as we were driving to his dads house he was acting very normal. all that pain, hurt, etc was not there. his whole energy was different. then what really got me was when we had got to a red light. he said “i already know my moms threw down, i wonder what she cooked”……….and i’m like, i know i’m not trippin. just went along with it and agreed with him cause what was i supposed to do lol😭?

so we pull up to the house and get to the door, and one of his brothers opened it. as we’re saying hi and walking further into the house we start smelling food and my bf goes “YUP! I KNEW IT!!”

then he walks into the kitchen and says “hey ma watchu in here cooking? it smells good”……. and his mom was literally standing there smiling before she gave him a hug.

this all happened naturally by the way. it was like… she never died😂😂 the power of revision yall!

anyways the whole afternoon went by like nothing ever happened.

i honestly thought it was pretty funny. knowing how they used to interact with each other while they were grieving kay’s death vs now was hilarious. and what makes it funnier is they never knew and never will 😂😂😂

so there y’all have it, how i revised my boyfriend’s mother’s death. sorry i made y’all wait so long:) i literally got so demotivated while trying to type this.

feel free to ask questions cause ik yall got some😩😂 love y’all 🫶🏾

#law of assumption #neville goddard #imagination creates reality #loa #states #revision #success stories #successstories #law of attraction #affirmations #success story

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alilarew23 · 1 month

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the law is always operating whether you’re experiencing what you want or not, so if you’ve been trying and trying and trying for months and all you’re experiencing is your own trying (and probably frustration/exhaustion), it’s time to stop.

before you throw hands, don’t worry, i’m not gonna tell you to give up on what you want. you’re meant to have it, you already do have it, you just need to operate from the state of fulfilled desire. so, let me help.

your “biggest” desire(s) materialized 30 minutes ago. you were fUcKiNg StOkEd, as you should be 🤭, powerful one, and then the excitement settled, and now you feel……………….

normal?

oop, yeah, all the manifesting stress skress is gonzo.

you no longer “have to” affirm or listen to subs or do SATS or any of that other stuff.

and of course you’re thinking about whatever you manifested, but instead of thinking of it as ~~~out there~~~ it’s now……………..

in your physical realm.

(which is still just consciousness, but whatever).

point is, you’re thinking about it like it’s here.

which it has been all along.

so, tell me, truly, what are your thoughts?

i love (SP) so much. i’m so relieved we are back together.

fuck i really needed that 1,000 bucks. now i can pay rent/put it toward buying my dog.

jk just manifest the dog lol. lord knows i’mma get my hound.

oooohhh baby! ya girl got hired, as she SHOULD. 💋 now it’s time to go get some fire office attire.

you get the idea. you’re thinking from your desire instead of of it.

that’s all that’s required to experience what you want!

so, do that. enter the state of fulfilled desire. whatever feelings/thoughts naturally arise are the “right” feelings/thoughts—because they’re natural, not forced—and otherwise, you just chill. live your life. be the coolest, kindest, most badass version of yourself.

and simply allow what’s already yours to materialize so fast.

now, you might feel a little fear at first, because there’s no way it can be this simple, but, 1) i promise it is this simple, and 2) it’s fine to feel fear. you can feel fear and still experience what you want! you can also look fear in the face and giggle because you know you’re the operant power, and, as within, so without, so like—what’s a silly mind-body sensation got on ya? nothing, that’s what. and, my favorite, you can transmute fear into excitement/gratitude.

but what if it doesn’t happen 😣😣😣 —> it already did happen! let’s goooooooooo 🤸🏻‍♂️

mmmmk. that’s what i’ve got for ya.

always here to help if you need it, but you probably need less help than you think you do.

you’re so goddamn powerful. know it. be it.

you want it? it’s done.

already written.

ALSO THIS POST DISAPPEARED FROM MY DRAFTS AND I WAS LIKE ABSOLUTELY NOT MY FOLLOWERS NEED IT I’M TURNING MY PHONE OFF AND BACK ON AND IT’LL BE BACK AND IT WAS. BLESS THE LAW. YOU’RE WELCOME.

muah.

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jujutsubaby · 3 months

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after hours (part 4)

☆ pairing: toji fushiguro x afab!reader, satoru gojo x afab!reader ☆ summary: you and toji FINALLY have some alone time...things are getting steamy in the fushiguro household...meanwhile, satoru gojo cannot keep his hands to himself, no matter how hard he tries. ☆ warnings: 18+. MINORS DNI !! oral sex (f!recieving & m!recieving) deepthroating, fingering, spanking, penetrative sex, slight power dynamic, dirty talk, hints of a threesome, masturbation, dirty fantasies ☆ tags: modernAU, babysittingAU ☆ a/n: OK IT"S FINALLY HERE U HORNDOGS <3 the toji smut i wrote once again with one hand 😈 i'm excited for the next chapter where i can finally write some gojo smut hehe 🤭 🖤🤍 series masterlist 🤍🖤

"be right back, gonna tuck megumi into bed really quick," toji says to before giving you a quick peck on the lips and heading upstairs.

you sit on toji’s couch, twiddling your thumbs, quite honestly feeling excited for the rest of the night. you’ve wanted this for long it feels like you manifested it and you just couldn’t wait any longer. you close your eyes and sigh deeply, imagining how toji’s hands would feel sliding up and down your body and shiver slightly. your hand starts wandering lower and lower down your stomach, but your thoughts are abruptly interrupted by your phone dinging. you immediately frown. getting a text from satoru is always an immediately boner kill…sometimes.

satoru: wyd wanna come over?

ugh, how many times do i have to tell him that i’m busy tonight? you quickly type a response.

y/n: dude i alr told u i was busy tn remember 😒

satoru: are u fr gonna let toji’s broke ass dick you down instead of hangin w me?? sad 😔

y/n: yes 🙃 best offer i’ve had tn

speech bubbles show up, indicating satoru is typing, and continues to type for what feels like hours (it was 30 seconds).

satoru: i guarantee u i can blow ur back better than he can. just ask anyone 😈

you stare at the text dumbfounded. what the actual FUCK is he on? you’re honestly so annoyed that he would try to slide into your thoughts right now, right before toji blows your mind.

y/n: kys

you put your phone on vibrate and mute satoru’s texts, not caring how he responds back. you go back to the fantasy you were thinking of before his intrusion and your hand starts sliding down your body once again. you’re imagining toji’s arms holding you tight and how skillful he was with his tongue last night. he never properly showed love to your tits, and you imagine him continuing what he was doing earlier in the night with your delicate buds. and satoru choking you while it happens. wait, what the fuck?

your hand immediately stops, shocked by your intrusive thoughts, but your lower body betrays you, soaking your panties.

as if your heart wasn't beating fast enough, you hear toji come down the stairs and you get up to meet him. he holds a hand out for you.

"have you ever been to my bedroom?" he asks, leading you up the stairs.

you giggle, excited to see toji's bedroom for the first time. "i haven't! i'm so excited! i feel like a person's bedroom says a lot about them and i just love-"

you're left speechless as you enter toji's bedroom, which is just plain sheets on a king sized mattress without a headboard, and a measly bedside drawer and dresser. you think you saw one of the two on the sidewalk last spring for spring cleaning.

"this is where the magic happens, pumpkin," toji says slyly. "i know, i know, contain yourself."

"there's no way you live like someone who's in kappa sigma. be so fucking for real right now, toji. you're literally a father..." you say, still in absolute shock over over his room. you vowed back in undergrad you would never hook up with a frat guy ever again and here now is this mid-30s man who you were about to link up with that doesn't have a headboard. you look up at toji nonplussed.

"i guarantee that you won't give a shit about how this place looks once i'm done with you." with that, toji lifts you up and starts kissing you deeply, tongue feverishly exploring yours. he slams your body down into his bed, and you're surprised that his bed is softer than you expected. your body melts into his sheets and you never break contact with his mouth, moaning into the kiss.

he breaks the kiss and flips you over, causing you to squeak. "let's get this thing off of you," toji growls, his eyes filled with hunger as he fiddles with the zipper on your back. you arch your back out, your ass meeting his hard member, and he hisses at the slight touch.

"calm down, pumpkin...so eager and slutty for me..." toji whispers as he finally undoes the buttons and zippers. it practically takes everything toji has to not rip your jumpsuit to shreds as he turns you over and peels your jumpsuit off of you, exposing your chest and your perky nipples.

he wastes no time and immediately latches on to one while kneading the other, and you let out a wanton moan, gripping his hair. the things he's doing with his tongue is sending electricity throughout your body and your back arches in pleasure.

toji moves on to your other nipple, and lightly bites and rolls it between his mouth, causing you to yell out a pathetic "toji, please..."

"what do you need from me, pumpkin?" he asks, lifting his head up and locking eyes with you.

"n-need...i need you in my mouth." you whimper, feeling so helpless to the lustful indulgence you were giving into.

toji grunts and places your hand on his hard member and you use your fingers to unzip his pants and palm him through his boxer briefs, whining for more. "can't keep my pumpkin waiting, can i?" he says, as he pulls his underwear down and his throbbing member bounces out.

your eyes widen at the sheer size of him, but you were never a quitter. your mouth salivates as your fingers wrap around him and start to move up and down. you kiss the tip and leave a trail of saliva connecting your lips to his throbbing member, before fully engulfing him in your mouth.

you hear toji let out a guttural moan before his hands fixate themselves as your makeshift ponytail. "just like that...yeah...you're taking me so well, pumpkin..." he says softly between throaty sighs. he starts moving your head up and down at a faster pace and you moan around him.

the vibrations of your constant moans sends toji into a frenzy. "fuck, y'think you can deepthroat me? think your little mouth can handle that?" he asks between deep breaths.

your eyes look up to meet his. you give him the green light, and toji wastes no time picking up the pace and fucking your mouth. your whimpers against him only motivates him to go faster. you don't think your mouth has ever been this full (and you're sure it's gonna be bruised tomorrow morning), and tears start to brim your eyes and mascara slowly smudges down your face. you're determined to take his full length into your mouth, or at least gag trying until he's close.

you should've known better than trying to fit all of him in. he's so incredibly huge so you don't get to take in his full length, and you end up gagging on him a few times. soon enough, toji finds a pace that allows your tongue to skillfully lick and suck his entire length while your hand takes over what you can't.

"f-fuck, pumpkin, you keep goin' like this i'm gonna get close..." toji says, his eyes closed, face flushed, and his mouth in an o-shape, taking in the sensations your mouth was performing. it really was a spectacularly lewd performance, as toji cannot recall another time another girl was so skilled with their tongue. none of the girls he fucked before compared to you.

you continue your ministrations, and just as toji warned before, he gets dangerously close before he abruptly pulls his soaked, leaking member off your mouth. you cry out at the loss of him inside your mouth, but finally relax your jaw as toji starts kissing your neck all the way up to your mouth, and then back to your neck.

as he starts to bite your neck and leaves, what you think will be, a giant purple patch tomorrow morning, you wantonly cry out. "t-toji~ please, i can't handle this anymore," as tears start to well up in your eyes from deepthroating him. "i-i n-need you i-inside m-mee~" you beg. your mind can barely form a coherent thought, as all you could think about was how you wanted to feel him. all of him.

toji lets out a breathy chuckle as he starts kissing you down your body, slowly removing the rest of your jumpsuit and leaving you in your - oh my god? why the hell are you wearing your pink panties with burger prints all over them?!

"ohmygod, sorry i totally forgot to change into sexy pant- ohh, f-fuck~"

toji kisses your wet clothed core deeply, hitting your bundle of nerves, causing you to stop mid-sentence. "these are fuckin' adorable, pumpkin," toji coos, his eyes never once leaving your clothed core, hypnotized by the sight of your wet panties sticking to your core in front him.

he slowly takes off your burger panties, and locks eyes with you, before his tongue flicks across your bundle of nerves, causing you to practically scream at how sensitive you were. toji smirks, knowing he quite literally hit the right nerve, before diving into it.

"o-ohh, f-fu-, don't stop, pleaaase~" you whine as you hold his head in place between your legs. you grind your core up and down, feeling your sensitive nub shoot pleasure through all part of your body and causing your toes to curl.

"you know, i think we forgot to get dessert tonight...", toji teases as he switches to his fingers rubbing rough circles on your bundle of nerves. "you taste better than anything we would've got..."

you breaths become heavier and shorter as you feel the familiar dam build up begging to release. "remember when i made you cum all over my face last time princess? let's do it two for two," toji says between licks to your sensitive and throbbing core.

"y-yes p-please, toji~" you nod, already feeling yourself coming undone. "i-i'm about to...please~" you beg, unable to stop the dam from breaking and you release over toji's mouth once again. toji takes in every part of you, making sure you ride your release until the very end, almost to the point of overstimulating you.

you to jerk your hips away from toji's mouth due to how overstimulated you got. satisfied, toji leans up to give you a wet open mouthed kiss that you whimper into pathetically, unable to properly prop yourself up after your first release. before you're able to say anything, toji flips you over on your chest and pulls your exposed ass up as he slips off his underwear.

"been waiting my turn for ages, pumpkin," he mumbles, as he licks his two fingers before sliding them inside your entrance, stretching and prepping your for his length. you let our a throaty moan as you feel yourself already ready for another release over just his fingers.

"think you can handle me, pumpkin?" he asks, taking his fingers out of you and you mewl at the loss of contact.

you bit your lip and widen your eyes as you look at him. his pupils were dilated and filled with lust, and you bit back a moan. "i can take you," you pout, feigning displeasure with toji's diffidence towards you. can you though? you've never had something as big as him inside you, and you knew it. but once again, you were never a quitter, always a pleaser.

he wordlessly chuckles, as he slowly teases your entrance with his tip. you shake your hips back and forth, eager to feel him fully inside you, and toji obliges, unapologetically sliding his full length inside your eager entrance.

he anticipates your long moan, and immediately slaps his hand over your mouth, and your cries end up muffled and muted. toji hisses at the way your walls immediately tighten around him.

"fuck, pumpkin. never met anyone tighter than you..." he grunts, slowly and rhythmically moving himself against your ass. you feel him hit the sensitive patch inside you, and your moans are muffled even further as toji tightens his hand around your mouth harder.

after pounding into you for a bit more, he releases his hand from your mouth, causing you to slur out toji's name. "t-toji~ i'm getting sooo clo-"

you're cut off by toji switching angles, as he pushes your back down, creating a harsh arch of your back. your face sinks headfirst into the pillows, and your ass flush against the base of toji's throbbing member. your whimpers are muffled against the pillows, as toji masterfully and ruthlessly starts to slam into you in and out. he's getting close, but he's determined to hold out until you are too.

toji's hand slips around your waist and his fingers start circling your bundle of nerves, causing you whimper and grab the bedsheets until your knuckles turn white. he switches up the sensation by giving your ass a harsh slap, earning a high pitched moan out of you. seeing the red palm imprint on your ass cheek spurs him on to hammer into you even faster.

you feel the familiar tight coil starting inside your core, spreading all over your body. your toes and fingers curl, and you're a moaning crying mess. your makeup is definitely staining toji's sheets but your don't even care. no one does.

toji alternates between relentlessly massaging your delicate nub and playfully slapping your ass as he's teetering closer and closer to the edge.

he feels your walls clench up around him and can tell your close. "need a release, pumpkin?" he says through gritted teeth and deep breaths.

you don't even understand what you say, your words slurred from the ecstasy of toji's sublime movements. how is he managing to hit your g-spot every single time?

"nnghh~ i-i'm g-gonna c-cu-"

you cry out in ecstasy as your walls begin to tighten around him as you feel the tight coil in your stomach unfurl with fireworks and spots blurring your vision as you have your second, and strongest, release of the night. your release directly results in toji's as you milk his hard throbbing pulsating member and he fills you up. he lets out quick, deep, guttural groans as he spills all over you. thank god you're on birth control.

you both are left breathing heavily, as you turn on your back, legs still twitching from how hard your body gave in to toji, who bounces into the spot next to you breathing heavily. you feel toji's seed slowly seeping out of you, but you can't bring yourself to care; you're far too fucked out to think a coherent thought.

he wraps his arms around you and pulls you close as you snuggle into his neck, just like a puzzle piece finding it's place. you sigh and close your eyes, hearing nothing the sound of your breaths in unison slowing down.

"that...was...so fun..." you whisper slowly in between breaths.

toji airily chuckles. "it was, wasn't it, pumpkin?" toji starts massaging your scalp an playing with your hair and you both sit in the comfortable companionable silence you both appreciated.

toji doesn't know when your silence turned into slumber, but when he gets up, he sees your eyes closed with your mouth slightly open, your mind somewhere far away. he knows he shouldn't wake you, but he also knows you really should use the bathroom before falling asleep. deciding on letting you sleep a bit more before waking you, he tries his best to slowly get out of the creaky bed and head to the washroom.

toji won't lie, he's also incredibly fucked out, and his eyes are droopy as he tries to stay awake while he brushes his teeth and gets out an extra tooth brush for you. once he's done, he approaches you silently and lightly shakes you to wake you up.

"mmmghh, stoppp i'm trying to sleep..." you mumble, clearly unreceptive to waking up.

"i know, pumpkin," toji coos, rubbing your body up and down, "y'gotta pee after sex, i read it somewhere i think..."

you sleepily giggle at his concern with your eyes closed as you lay on your back. "ugh, fine...but you have to keep my spot warm for me." you warn, as toji helps you get up.

"left you a toothbrush on the counter. it's the blue one."

"gotcha," you say with a thumbs up as you swing your legs over the bed. as you take the first step, you double down over the pain you feel in your abdomen and lower stomach and yelp.

a concerned toji runs over to your side, only to start grinning and laughing. he leans down your level. "ohhh, someone's sore..." he teases.

"shut up toji~" you yell in a loud whisper, frowning at him laughing at your pain. "this is all your fault," you pout.

"okay, go pee and brush your teeth and i'll make it up by playing w your hair again until you sleep," he promises, giving your ass a quick slap. you give him a playfully dirty look before heading to the bathroom to finish your business.

while brushing your teeth, you send quick text to shoko letting her know you're planning to stay the night with toji. immediately, you get a text back from her acknowledging it, but even more surprisingly, you get a text from satoru:

satoru: so ur spending the night at his place, huh? that good? 🤨

no way they're together right now. you furrow your eyebrows and send a quick text back.

y/n: what are you doing w shoko

satoru: i'm at ur apartment stupid i told u i got bored

y/n: stay away frm my room

satoru: too late i'm going to do 3/3 of my jerk offs in ur bed tn :/

you don't know why you snorted. i mean it was a little funny. you shake your head and finish brushing your teeth. you look at your reflection in the mirror and notice all the mascara and eyeliner streaks on your face and have to hold back a laugh. you're looking so ridiculous and fucked out, and you know shoko and utahime would find it hilarious (and partially very happy for you for having a fun time). you grab your phone and take a selfie of your makeup streaked face and send it to your group chat with them.

y/n: [1 Photo] it happened ya'll 🤪

utahime and shoko both immediately respond:

utahime: u deserve this queen u manifested it 💓

shoko: i do NOT want to hear that ur down bad ever again after this

shoko: also !! [1 Photo]

shoko sends you a screenshot of her and utahime's villager avatars on their animal crossing island, cottagecore witchy theme and all, holding hands. this might possibly be the cutest thing you've ever seen in your life and send at least 10 hearts in response.

you let out a big yawn and head back to bed. you have an early morning tomorrow, as you made plans with your friends to meet up at cafe amanai again to dissect the parent teacher conference. you can't remember why you were so nervous about tonight -- it went just as lovely as you hoped (aside from all the dumb texts from satoru).

"gotcha this also so you're not cold," toji mumbles, half alseep, pointing to his national park t-shirt on the bed. you put it on, and it's the perfect oversized fit for you. oh my god, it's kinda cute...should you keep it?

you get into bed and bonk toji's head lightly. "hey! you said you would play with my hair," you chide, facing away from him, but pushing your body snugly against his. he pulls you even closer, accepting his role as the big spoon, and mumbles something you can't hear starts playing with your lightly.

you hum in contentment. "by the way, this t-shirt..." you yawn. "it's...so dilfy."

"hmm..." toji says half alseep, "bet you say that to all the dilfs you fuck..."

you feel so warm inside when you realize you can hear his smile in that response, even half asleep. "you got me," you joke, as the sound of toji's breathing and his fingers caressing your scalp sends you into a blissful slumber within minutes.

meanwhile, at your apartment, shoko and utahime are bidding farewell to suguru and satoru. utahime is trying not to rush them out, but she really doesn't want her night to be more soiled by satoru than it already is, and shoko agrees.

satoru drives himself and suguru back, mostly in silence since it is past midnight, and they are both incredibly tired. once back at their apartment, like clockwork, satoru finds himself doing the motions to get ready for bed.

his head plops into his silk pillow and despite being obviously tired and having an early morning of gossip sessions, work, and classes ahead of him, he cannot stop thinking about the photo he sneakily saw of you on shoko's phone -- the one of your mascara running down your face.

if he recalls correctly, you didn't have a neck hemline in the photo either, so you were probably naked too. he's trying really hard not to think about him fucking your mouth like that. no, he really is, he swears his hands are just reaching down his boxers magically. he's also getting hard despite trying to replace your face with literally any other girl he's slept with, but it always reverts back to you.

satoru always makes jokes about blowing your back out, and he knows he's joking...right? it's just a cheeky joke he makes with one of his best friends, satoru thinks, as he's starts stroking himself more passionately.

his breath hitches, and he imagines you- no, not you, that, uh, other girl...what's her name? jessica? he imagines jessica's face tearing up as he casually rams himself deeper into your throat - no, jessica's throat!

fuck, satoru thinks, reaching closer to the edge of no return. at this point, he's shameless as he let's his fantasies run wild. he thinks of you on your knees, tongue sticking out, waiting for him to spill all over your fucked out face. satoru climaxes hard, and wishes nothing more than to watch you clean it up with your mouth.

god, satoru knows it's wrong but you both have bad habits of blurring the lines of your friendship...

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arisuworld · 7 months

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HOW TO IGNORE THE 3D?

A lot of people get confused over the phrase "ignoring the 3D." They think this means they have to “act as if,” lie to themselves and the people around them, and then end up feeling pretty delusional. However, i’m here to tell you that it's NOT THE CORRECT WAY. If you're doing this, you're probably gonna end up feeling like you're being delusional and lose faith in LOA overall. first of all, we need to rephrase the term “ignoring the 3D.” When neville goddard and other teachers said to “ignore” the 3D, they didn’t mean to literally ignore it. They meant to stop REACTING to it mentally, to what the 3D is showing to you. So the better phrase would be to “not react to the 3D".

જ⁀➴ FIRSTLY, YOU MUST KNOW THAT-

1. You're the god of your reality. You have the power to change anything you want. Nothing can stop you, other than YOU.

2. Circumstances do not matter. They're NOT permanent. They change in literal seconds.

3. Subconscious does not have eyes. What you tell it, is what it will assume.

4. 3D is nothing but a bitch of 4D. It will conform to your assumptions, right in front of your eyes.

• WHAT DOES 'IGNORING THE 3D' MEANS?

So, what exactly does not reacting to the 3D mean? It means to not mentally reaffirm unfavorable assumptions about the 3D. For example, if you’ve been affirming that you're your ideal height but suddenly you come across a mirror and see the opposite, DON’T MENTALLY REACT TO IT!!! Simply acknowledge it and know that you already have your desires and the 3D will conform no matter what. Also, keep in mind that it’s completely fine to react emotionally to the 3D. You can cry or be angry, you’re still human after all. But don’t let your thoughts slip back into the old story and old pattern of thinking because once you do, it will manifest the opposite.

I know, this is way easier said than done, but once you master this, all of your manifestations will literally come flowing in!!

: ̗̀➛ HERE ARE SOME TIPS TO HELP YOU CURB YOUR REACTION TO THE 3D

1. KNOW YOUR POWER: Whenever you face any unfavorable circumstances, sit back and take deep breaths.Remind yourself that you're the god and nothing can stop you from achieving the things you desire.

2. SUBLIMINALS: I know subliminals aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but i personally love them! There are some really great ones for self-concept, and a bunch for literally any specific desire. (i'll make a separate post in the future on subs and how to use them).

3. YOGA NIDRA/ MEDITATION: This is an excellent way to not only get into a calmer state, but to really tune into your thoughts and become aware of what assumptions are serving you are not. (I personally love Lizzy Hill's yoga nidra video!!)

4. IMPROVE SELF CONCEPT: When faced with an unfavorable circumstance, you may be tempted to let your thoughts spiral back into the old story. By keeping a strict mental diet, you can prevent this from even happening. Don’t even give your mind a chance to go back to your old assumptions.

5. CREATE NEW ASSUMPTIONS: By this, I mean creating a whole new assumption for whenever you react to the 3D. This can be something like “negative thoughts never manifest,” “nothing, not even i, can stop my desires from manifesting” or “everything works out for me.” Affirm these if you’re reacting emotionally.

At the end of the day, the most important thing to remember is to PERSIST despite what you see in the 3D!! Don’t ever give up on your desires. Your desires have NO choice but to manifest!!

#manifestation #manifestation blog #law of assumption #void state #loa blog #loassumption #manifesting #loa #manifesation

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thisismeracing · 4 months

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How you get the girl | DR3

― Pairing: Daniel Ricciardo x black!plus size!reader ― Warning: mentions of food and alcohol; Mclaren Danny and tooth-rotting fluff. (1.5k words) ― Summary: Yn is tired of going on dates only to realize that the guy she thought was great, was actually terrible. So that’s why when her friend tells her she knows someone who would match perfectly, Yn accepts the blind date. It’s gonna be her last attempt at love, and now Daniel only has one date to prove he’s worth it. (based on this request)

▸ my masterlist | my taglist | patreon guide ▸ support my writing by reblogging, leaving a comment (don’t forget to follow me if you like the piece), or buying me a coffee

There are many ways in which one can fall in love. Yn didn't expect it to happen with her on the first date. To be fair, she didn’t expect it to happen to her at all. Being a plus-size black girl she learned to love herself, well aware that the way society portrays beauty wouldn’t always include her. Her shade, shape, and experiences. Which doesn’t mean she was not pretty. Quite the opposite, she knew she was stunning, and no validation was needed for that, yet you can miss it every once in a while. It rejoices your soul to hear how good you look and how smart you are.

But she left it on the second plan, focusing on her work and studies. Things were good, great even, however, her friends knew she deserved someone good. And as it happens, they knew exactly the pair for her.

Daniel was not looking for love either. He liked how things were going, and liked how he was able to focus in a different light this season, however, he missed it. Missed having someone to celebrate post-races with, to cuddle, and to hold him when he felt down. That’s why when Adam and Amina, two of his close friends from a tight group, proposed to set him up on a blind date he accepted. There wasn’t anything to lose, and he liked to follow his own bits of advice about enjoying being naive, enjoying the butterflies.

Even though it was a blind date, it was Danny who set up everything, with the help of his friends, of course. According to them, Yn would like a beach date. So that’s what he aimed for.

And it felt just right when she showed up wearing an orange summer set with a shy, yet bright smile on her face.

Yn didn’t know at the time, but she had just given a whole meaning to the orange color for him.

“You must be Amina’s friend, Daniel, right?” Yn asked, voice being carried by the wind and getting mixed with the sounds of waves crashing behind them.

Daniel nodded watching her curls bounce and her lips stretch in a small smile, “Yeah-Yeah, it’s me.”

“Yn,” they shook hands with a shy smile because even though Daniel was anything but shy, something about that date seemed new to him, like something he never experienced before.

“I hope you like the beach, and pizza. I wanted to go for something private and chill, Amina and Adam agreed, but still, I hope I got this right.”

She smiles, looks at the blanket on the sand, the pizza box, and the wine, then nods, “I love it. It’s exactly what I would go for had I been the one to choose the setting.”

“Really?” There’s a slight hint of disbelief mixed with amusement in his tone, and it makes Yn chuckle.

“Maaaaybe this would tie with a coffee shop date,” she confesses.

“We can do coffee shop for our second date,” Daniel is quick to shoot his shot and Yn arches her brow, she wants to smile again.

“What makes you think we’re having a second date?”

“I’m just manifesting, throwing it to the universe,” he jokes and she can’t help but laugh while they walk side by side to the blanket. “See? I made you laugh, my chances are getting higher, aren’t they?”

“It all depends on the pizza flavor, now.”

“Good thing I got one slice from each, then.”

“You kidding me?”

“No, and I got a whole one of your favorite flavor, well, according to Amina.”

Yn watches in disbelief and Danny sits by her side and sure enough, opens the two boxes of pizza showing her a pizza with different slices and a whole one of her favorite.

“Ok, and that’s how you get the girl. You might have landed a second date, Daniel.”

He smiles brightly and she can’t help but think that he now has a third one too.

“So, aside from having a great taste in pizza, what else should I know about you?” He asks while opening the wine bottle and Yn chews on a bit of food before starting to tell him about herself.

They go back and forth, there’s never the awkward silence, and they realize they have many things in common aside from the two friends that set them up. Yn has no idea he’s a driver and somehow it makes Daniel even more enamored by her. She seems to like him for who he is truly, and not because of a cool side of his that happens to make him famous and rich. It’s warm and fuzzy, and fun, and the symphony of waves crashing down and giggles envelop their afternoon until the sun starts to set and they decide to head home parting with a timid kiss in the corner of their lips.

It’s on the second date when she makes fun of his milk foam mustache and sips her own coffee mirroring his image that Daniel realizes he might be in love. Her dark skin is glowing, and the hair atop her head is like a halo, while she smiles at his camera with a funny face pointing at her mustache. Both unaware there are other people in the small coffee shop.

Daniel can only see Yn.

And Yn can only see Daniel.

At the end of that date, he takes her home and kisses her at her door. It’s soft and warm, and it feels right. It feels perfect. They fit together like two puzzle pieces. His heart racing under her hand, and her face stretching in a smile under his. He gets inside, and they talk and kiss a bit more before he has to leave.

It doesn’t take long for the third date to happen. Just two days, both counting the hours to see each other while frantically texting. It’s a drive-in theater, Yn’s idea. They watch a horror movie while Daniel gets scared by the jumps every time, making Yn laugh. They also share a popcorn pot, fingers shyly caressing the other whenever they touch by accident. When the movie ends and the credits are rolling around, the moon and the gleam from the big screen in front of them casting a distinctive glow on Yn, Daniel is sure he’s in love.

“Hey, so- I have this race next week, would you wanna go with me? I can fly you out on Saturday, or you can go with me and see how everything works from behind the scenes,” he suggests, fingers crossed in the dark praying for her to accept, praying for her not to think he’s being too fast. Maybe he was indeed, but this was all new to him too. He was fast on the track, he was never this fast outside it, never this fast to fall, to want someone, to seek someone, to show off someone. He wanted her by his side.

“Wouldn’t it be like making things official?” Yn asks genuinely curious and Daniel can tell by the way she bites her lips and one of her eyebrows goes up the slightest.

“Yeah, am I going too fast?”

“I mean, you’re a racing driver, I would say it’s your job to go fast, isn’t it?” She jokes and he laughs throwing his head on the headrest.

“Yes, but outside the track, I only wanna go fast like this for you.”

“That was so cheesy.”

“But did you like it?” He grins, and Yn rolls her eyes playfully before her body bends over the dash to capture his lips in a kiss.

“I loved it.”

And so a few days later Yn finds herself on a private plane meeting a bunch of different people and being introduced as his girlfriend, because sure enough, Daniel asked properly when he dropped her home that night. He got her a necklace and everything the next day. She learns that racing and the whole Formula 1 thing is more hectic than it seemed, but still, it’s fun. Amina and Adam watch the Sunday race with her, making fun of the way she can’t help but cheer loudly sometimes and bite her nails.

That was the Sunday Daniel got P1. The same Sunday he ran to her before the podium and kissed her lips in front of everyone, giving her his biggest smile and thanking her for being there, his lucky charm.

That was also the Sunday he said he loved her for the first time while they celebrated in private after the party. Laced in each other's love, gazing into the other’s eye, the certainty of the truth behind his statement.

Their friends were right, they were perfect for each other.

────── ⋆🪩 VOICEMAIL: Hi, honeybees! I hope you guys liked this piece! <3 I wanted to add a huge shout-out to C (my coffee emoji anon on Tumblr) for proofreading this (Ily, C!)

If you liked this piece and want early access to new ones and exclusive access to others, subscribe to my patreon!💘

▸ check my main masterlist | patreon guide and my taglist.

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©thisismeracing ― do not copy, steal, or translate my work; do not repost on a different media platform.

#dr3 #daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo x black!reader #f1 x black!reader #f1 x plus size!reader #plus size!reader #f1 fandom #f1 fluff #daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo imagine #millie writes #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #f1 fanfic

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tarotphlow · 1 year

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Astro observations 6

🃏Libra Mercuries are easy to pinpoint in conversation because they usually reply with phrases like: that’s fair, that makes sense, understandable,

🃏 Jupiter in cancer is weird, cause like it’s exalted and everything, but the most exalted thing about them is an obsession with religion/ spirituality.

🃏 I feel like Saturn in Gemini get annoyed really easily with their father not understanding things if that makes sense.

🃏 if your Neptune is in retrograde you may be less likely to have an addictive personality

🃏 I’m once again, here to talk about Pluto in the 12H. 12H is such an interesting house it just somehow seems to embody everything else in the other houses somewhat. Anyways though, I’m beginning to realize this placement is a master at manifesting things, understanding the manifestation process is… well a process, but once they fully understand it’s intricacies it becomes sooooo incredibly easy for them, they may have manifested stuff without realizing it!

🃏 Jupiter in the 7H natives can manifest the properties of the placement in a couple of ways, Lots and Lots and LOTS of relationships (this placement can be an indicator of a playa highkey highkey 🤭) or being with people on the ✨bigger ✨end orrrr marrying into wealth! Yet again, it could also be a mix of the three.

🃏 Having Mercury at 6° in a natal chart can indicate a speech issue like stuttering or so.

🃏 Sun sextile Pluto can mean that your an old soul, or you’ve lived a different life before!!

🃏lastly, if the audience has noticed I’ve been studying degrees recently in my free time, I’ve been looking at a specific degree recently that has caught my attention, and that’s the 2°. The zodiac sign Taurus rules that degree and it’s such a powerful degree to have in your chart, if you have it, consider yourself blessed and lucky!🍀☺️. The 2° can show that you have near perfect or have perfected whatever placement the degree is in in your lifetime, I’ll give an example. A good friend of mine has neptune in 2°. Seeing as this degree is a sign of perfection this kid has like super omega awesome intuition, there’s a story of them talking with one of their friends about a boyfriend, the 2° native had noticed something was fishy about said boyfriend and tried to talk thier friend out of the relationship. The 2° native told their friend about how the relationship was going to go down why it was gonna go down and what time it was going to happen. Every single thing that kid said was gonna happened, happened. Down to the MINUTE. It’s insane right? It’s always so fascinating to see things like this play out in astrological terms!!! I’ve heard that placements that aren’t planets like AC, DC, IC tend to achieve great things in their lifetime so that’s also an added reason as to why this degree is so cool! I myslef have my Cap ascendant at 2° and my cancer descendant at 2° so ig something big or great is supposed to happen to me??

end of observations! I hope y’all enjoyed this one! I apologize about my inactivity recently, I’ve been like, going through it lol, life is kinda hitting hard rn so I’ve kinda gone into hermit mode a bit (guess what placement makes me like that lololol) but I’m still very happy that people appreciate these observations 🖤🖤🖤 likes and reposts are appreciated!!

Also… I have some news coming in during the next year! Stay tuned!!!

Oh also also! I now understand how replying to reblogs work now. Kinda embarrassed I didn’t realize it sooner but yea.

#astro observations #astrology #astro community #astro notes #astro placements #astro posts #astro blurbs

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justalia · 5 months

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I feel like when I’m not in the state of wish fulfilled I don’t have it and my progress is lost. how do get confidence and stand firm in the fact that I have it even when I feel tired of not having what I want?

you need to realize there is no progress.

there is no journey if not the one inside of you where you get more comfortable with experiencing what you wish inside imagination instead of allowing the outer world to dictate what you can experience.

drop all the terminology: stop manifesting, stop worrying about being in the state, stop forcing a feeling, stop looking for something, stop wondering if you’re doing it right, stop asking yourself if you’re “thinking from it” or “of it” and stop waiting for movement or proof.

there is no “i have to do this in this way so i will get this”, all you truly need to focus on is on making yourself content in any situation.

the real journey is becoming more and more comfortable and inclined to experience what you actually want inside of imagination no matter the circumstances outside of your mind.

yes we do say nothing is separate and both the 3D and Imagination are the same, but imagination is separate because in imagination you can change instantly no matter what is happening outside.

it doesn’t really matter if your sp told you they don’t love you, you can hear them telling you they love you inside of imagination.

it doesn’t really matter if you have short hair, you can see yourself with the longest hair in the world if you wanted to.

it doesn’t really matter if you have the lowest grades in class, you can imagine yourself as the smartest kid in the school.

nothing, absolutely nothing, can prevent you from experiencing something new and more pleasant in imagination.

nothing BUT YOU.

not even the 3D can stop you, YOU are the one allowing it to dictate who you are in imagination. YOU are choosing to ignore the more pleasant experience to what YOU FEEL it’s more real.

start by choosing what you want to experience in imagination and stop worrying about what’s gonna happen after you imagine it.

choose what your heart TRULY desires, without any judgement, and experience it with your imagination just for the sake of satisfying your thirst for it, experience it just because you want it now and stop waiting for it on the outside.

remember that even when something is happening outside of you physically, you’re still experiencing it mentally always. before, during and after the experience you’re experiencing imagination.

everything you live is inside of yourself.

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cursingtoji · 1 year

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𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 — 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥!𝐒𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚

part 2 of Sweet Sacrifice

summary: Chainsaw man universe where humans can form contracts with devils in exchange of sacrificing something valuable.

cw: chainsaw man spoilers (anime only), self insert into csm canon, reader is in love with Aki, dub-con, heavy oral (f -> m), deep throat. choking, bruises, spit, failed attempt of masturbation, Sukuna has a normal human form (at least for now), reader goes into Sukunas domain, as per the last chapter reader is a virgin 4k words.

note: this was very fun to write, quick info… for reasons of “just cause” himeno is not into aki in this series. also i have plans for the next chapters but feel free to speculate

After the last mission with Aki you felt like everyone at the public safety building looked at you weirdly, like they were trying to understand how a not so skillful hunter finished a strong devil by herself.

Aki thankfully taught you to not share too much about your devils and the contracts, so you knew how to defend yourself if anyone asked you about Sukuna.

“Makima-sama wants to see us” Aki said, joining your walk.

“Great” you mumbled ironically but followed him anyway.

Aki knocked and you heard Makima calling you in.

After a quick greeting she started asking about the report from your previous assignment together. You haven’t read it before Aki submitted it so you allowed him to confirm the information.

“...So you summoned Sukuna with a cursed word and he appeared beside you?” Makima asked you directly.

That was not what happened. Sukuna took your body. Aki would not lie about this, but you know the actual truth is not what he would’ve written as well. Having Sukuna taking control of your body was a huge risk for the public safety, the type of risk that could get you executed like a devil.

“Actually—“ he started.

“I’m not asking you” her eyes did not leave yours.

“No, my contract with Sukuna allows me to use his strength as it was my own, he does not manifest physically as another entity. If Hayakawa wrote that, my apologies, he was hurt and probably confused, I should’ve explained better” you took the fault knowing that Aki did not write what Makima said.

“Very well” she seemed pleased with your answer and you could hear Aki exhaling relieved, “What did Sukuna take?” the question got you in alert mode. That was your superior asking. What should you say? Would she know if you lie?

“Makima-sama, with all due respect, I don’t think she needs to disclose that information” your eyes widened, you never saw him standing up for Makima like that.

“It’s nothing that’s gonna be missed,” you added, not wanting Aki to suffer any consequences.

“Fine, congratulations y/n, thanks to your new contract you have an offer to join the 3rd division.”

“What?” Aki and you said at the same time.

Makima slid an envelope to you.

“They need an answer till the end of the week, you may go now. Hayakawa you stay” you bowed, still a little confused and left the room not without exchanging a look with Aki, “Leave the door open” she ordered.

On your way out you saw a blond kid waiting outside, upon hearing Makima's voice he quickly fixed his posture and entered the room.

You haven’t even taken the offer and Makima was already replacing you as Aki’s partner. Bitch.

You went back to your desk, and found that week’s patrol shift. Today you were by yourself, patrolling a chill area and replying to the radio channel which the police use to call for public safety back up.

You sighed, knowing this day was gonna be long and boring. Leaving the building you decided to walk to your area, using a path Aki and you would always take. But before you got there, something drew your attention to an alley. It was the middle of the day, you doubted a devil could be there, but either way you carefully approached the source of the noise and recognized Aki’s voice.

Hiding behind an irregular wall you listened to the conversation. You couldn’t see them without them seeing you but it was obvious he was beating the shit out of someone, you assumed it was the skinny boy from before.

“Makima-san is not the kind of woman a punk like you should be chasing” followed by the indistinguishable sound of fist hitting a face.

“Sounds to me you like her too” the boy replied. You felt your heart sinking.

Why was Aki defending Makima? So what if that newbie wanted to be her new pet? To hell both of them!

But why does Aki have to get involved? You wanted him to defend your honor and only you—

What honor?

You heard that familiar and yet strange voice inside your head.

You swallowed your shame and left the alley, wanting to focus on anything but Aki.

It’s not like you could have him anyways.

“You greedy asshole” Denji kicked Aki’s balls once again, “I saw you partner, what else do you want, huh?” he kicked again, “You get to hang out with a hot chick like that everyday and you’re giving me shit for wanting the same with Makima? Fuck you” before he could give another kick he saw Aki wasn’t getting up, “Shit”.

Two days later, when the sun was setting you ran into Aki when you were leaving a house after finishing executing a small devil. He was talking to the cops outside.

“Hey, I beat you on this one” you smiled at him.

“I heard you replying the call on the radio” he defended, “Just wanted to come by in case…”

“In case what? In case I couldn’t handle it? Please, that devil was the size of a pigeon” you made a sign to the cops that it was done.

“So, do you miss me already?” you teased him.

“In comparison to those two I miss you every hour of the day” he threw that statement unbothered, it was enough to make some blood rush to your face.

“That’s right, you have a fiend now as well” you giggled imagining how Aki dealt with the fiend, he confirmed with a grumpy face.

“Have you accepted the offer?” he asked.

“Oh I forgot about it” indeed you haven’t even opened the letter yet, “I’ll take till the end of the week.”

“Why?”

“I’m just not thrilled to work with a bunch of freaks.”

“That's basically what division 4 is now” you laughed and he smiled.

“They are living with me, you know” Aki picked up a cigarette and lit it up, you watched waiting for him to continue, he took a long drag and extended the cigarette to you, “Power, the fiend and Denji, the Chainsaw”.

“Chainsaw huh…” you wondered, “Why though?”

“Makima-sama asked me to” you felt that weird tightening in your stomach again.

“You’re an idiot.”

“I guess I am.”

Since you haven’t given an answer to the offer yet, Makima put you with division 4 on a mission the next day to recover a piece of the gun devil in a hotel. There you got to meet the new members and saw your senpai, Himeno.

“They don’t look so bad” you whispered to Aki, he even got the devils to call him senpai… after a bribe but whatever works.

“Give it some time.”

During that week so far you have been feeling weird, ever since that night with Sukuna actually, if you can even call it that. Every night after a stressful work day you recalled that event, silently expecting him to show up again, but nothing. So you managed to drift your focus to something else, by now that tactic only made you more and more horny.

“y/n will give you one as well” your attention was drawn back to the current situation when Himeno put an arm around your shoulders.

“What?” the team was looking at you weirdly, especially the Chainsaw boy, “I’ll give a what?”

“A kiss to whoever defeats the devil.”

“Not a chance.”

Denji started to talk about how he already decided who he’s gonna kiss.

“…when it comes to sex stuff it feels way better when its with two people who get each other.”

You couldn’t hold back a scoff/laugh, it was automatic given the situation you were in, no one seemed to have noticed your reaction but when your eyes met Aki’s looking at you weirdly you decided to put an end to that subject, Himeno seemed to have convinced Denji anyways.

“Let’s go” you called and all of you entered the building. The rookies leading the way meanwhile the three of you stayed a bit behind.

You let your thoughts wander, thinking about what sex would feel like with Sukuna.

Next time I won’t be so good.

That’s what he said last. You have no idea what he meant by that, or what to expect next, but something made you think you were gonna find it out soon enough.

A couple minutes later chaos seemed to have taken over, power killed a ugly fucking devil, then you all got stuck in the 8th floor, Kobeni was crying and trying to drink toilet water, Denji was sleeping like a baby. After looking around you gave up trying to find a way out and simply layed on a bed in an empty room.

“Could have been worse” you murmured to yourself. You seem to have all this time and nothing to do.

The bed was pretty comfortable… your core still burned, would it be too bad if…?

You slowly brought your hand down your uniform till your finger found your clit over the material of your trousers.

You sighed, felt good, you needed some release. You closed your eyes, circling that spot and thinking of that night when Sukuna had control, but instead you imagined Aki to be one touching you and—

“AARGH” you screamed louder than you should’ve, a sudden sharp pain in your lower lips had taken you off guard. When you looked down you found Sukuna’s mouth in your palm “Did you fucking bite me?!” you accused. He clearly bit you through the pants.

“When I told you I was gonna be the only one touching I meant it, not even you can touch yourself got it?”

“That’s ridiculous I—“ your left hand seemed to have transformed into his again, bigger with sharp black nails, he went straight for your neck, choking you.

Down the hall you heard Aki calling your name, he probably heard your scream and was now opening every room to find you.

You panicked, not wanting him to find Sukunas hand around your neck.

“Sukuna” you begged.

“That’s not my name.”

“M-master please…”

“Say you won’t do it again” his grip tightened, cutting your breath, Aki’s voice was closer.

“I— won’t— I p-promise” you chocked out.

Right when he let go of you and you gained the control of your hand back again Aki barged in.

“What’s wrong?” he rushed to your side on the bed, putting his hands on your shoulders to take a look at your face while you coughed.

You managed to come out with a lie about having a nap then waking up from a nightmare and choking with nothing. He didn’t seem to believe it but didn’t ask anymore questions either.

“I need smoke” he got up from the bed, “Come on” and took your hand making you go with him.

You hated to lie to Aki, it was necessary, but whenever you felt his skin touch yours like that you almost felt like giving up on everything, on Sukuna, on being a hunter…

“Himeno-senpai, do you have any cigarettes left?”

“I want one too” you added

“Sorry, that’s the last one,” she replied.

Both you and Aki asked for it, Himeno gave him first then he gave you. You realized how close you were to each other’s faces when Denji screamed “indirect triple kiss!”You giggled while Aki told him to shut it.

More time had passed, you have no idea what time it is but you really wished you had taken a nap. Now, Himeno, Aki and you were lying on the hall facing the huge disgusting blob the devil had become.

Himeno asked Aki if he had a plan, he always had a plan, but this time the only thing you were certain of was not killing Denji since that’s what the devil wanted.

“I’ll use the sword” your heart skipped a beat, you quickly protested it as well as Himeno.

“I’ll use Sukuna first” you argued.

“Who? What’s that?” Denji asked.

“That’s one of the devils I have a contract with—“ you started to explain but Aki cut you off.

“He’s not gonna be useful here. If that thing doesn’t have any weakness there’s nothing Sukuna can do.”

“Oh and what can your sword do?” his words made your blood boil, was he trying to underestimate your contract with Sukuna?

“Oi, no fighting” Himeno interrupted, but before you could continue Aki got up, taking you with him by your arm before the devil moved in your direction, then you were running.

Fuck, you needed to do something.

The whole floor starts to bend in the devils direction, you found a stable place in a room, Kobeni was screaming about throwing Denji to the devil.

“I’ll use the sword” Aki said and you got the cursed word to summon Sukuna on the tip of your tongue.

“I’m not gonna do it” he said from inside your head.

Fucker.

“Himeno” you warned her, Denji was not about to become devil food, but you also didn’t want Aki to lose years of his life if he used the sword.

“Die!” Kobeni screamed and ran towards Denji with a knife.

“Enchain” you called.

You lost consciousness for no more than 5 seconds, but when you came back Kobeni was on the floor, a bloodied knife beside her and—

“Aki” you whispered nothing but the pool of blood coming out of him “Sukuna… what the fuck”.

“You called too late little hunter, that was not our deal, you’re gonna pay for it” he replied in that voice only you could hear.

You kneeled beside Aki while he defended Denji and Power tried to manipulate his blood, when she touched him he flinched and reached for the closest thing that happened to be your hand.

Himeno was freaking out, the Kobeni again, until Denji got up.

“If I manage to kill this fucking devil, I still expect to get that kiss” he screamed at Himeno but looked at you too before explaining his plan. That boy was deranged, but you liked him.

So long have passed, Denji was still slicing the eternity devil, Power really seemed to have stopped Aki’s bleeding, you managed to not fall sleep for too long while laying beside him, you wanted to make sure he was still alive, so you keep waking yourself up.

“Hey” he murmured, “you have awful eye bags.”

“I would punch you if you weren’t stabbed” you murmured back. He adjusted himself getting closer to you, he was pale but not as much as when he got hit by the knife, “I’m glad you’re okay” you placed your head on his shoulder.

“Can he hear us talking?” he whispered.

“Who?”

“Sukuna” you looked up.

“I don’t think so” you replied, Sukuna only seemed to be around when you were by yourself or in a stressful situation.

“I saw him” Aki moved some hairs away from your face, “When you said the word, I saw your features change, your eyes got darker, he didn’t do anything, but he smiled when I got stabbed, you smiled…” your eyes widened.

“I’m sorry, I should’ve done something myself” your heart broke, Aki sounded so fragile.

“It’s okay, I’m fine” he placed his arm on your shoulder, resting his cheek on your forehead, “Can you promise me something?”

“Maybe, what?”

“If you don’t feel safe with Sukuna, terminate the contract”.

Safe…

“I’ll think about it.”

Thankfully Denji was right, he managed to defeat the devil by himself, freeing everyone else from the 8th floor. While Power was holding Aki on her back, you approached Denji.

“You must be exhausted,” you murmured.

“It’s not so ba—“ you gave his cheek a peck when he wasn’t looking at you directly.

“Well, you deserved it so…” before you finished he fell backwards, but Himeno got him when he was about to hit the floor.

“Let’s get them to the hospital” Himeno said and you agreed.

With Aki and Denji spending the night in the hospital for observation, you decided to go back home and check on them the next day.

Home seemed to embrace you when you arrived, finally having your own food and a decent shower.

After a long time washing your body and hair you stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around you, but the second your toe touched the ground you heard a voice

“Enchain”.

And everything around you changed like you were transported somewhere else.

“What the…” it seemed like a dark cave, looking down you seemed to be standing on a wet floor, was that blood? It didn’t smell like blood, although the place looked like it was rotting it didn’t smell like anything weird. There were bones around, piles of them, and a huge spine above you.

“Don’t look around without permission” you heard him again, behind you.

“You—“ when you turned around you met his naked chest.

Only then you realized you haven’t seen Sukuna in a human form since your contract, you forgot how tall he was. He was wearing a white robe, tied around his waist, from that point up his torso was exposed, black lines adorning it.

You took a step back, raising your head to look at his face, he had an obnoxious smile and a look of superiority.

“Where the fuck am I?”

“In my domain, basically in my mind” he turned around and sat down on a throne made of bones.

“That explains why this place is so creepy... How do I get out?”

“You can’t until I say so.”

“Suk—“ you rolled your eyes and was about to say his name in a very disrespectful tone until you met his serious face, “What do you want?”

“Do I have to remind you of our deal? You said Enchain, now you gotta pay.”

“You did nothing” you crossed your arms, “I may have said it but you failed to keep your word.”

“Watch your mouth, hunter. Contracts have power, if I hadn’t held my end of the deal I would’ve suffered the consequences, but here we are. If that dumb head of yours wasn’t so busy thinking about getting fucked you would’ve realized that was nothing for me to do in that situation”

You opened your mouth to argue back, but quickly realized you were in no position to do so.

“Whatever, let’s get this over with” with that he pulled the only thing that was covering your body, the white towel, and threw it away.

You attempted to cover yourself, but he pushed your shoulders down until you fell on your knees in front of his throne.

“Sukuna, not here” whatever was under the wet ground was rough on your knees, and the whole setting made you uneasy. All the skulls laying around seemed to be watching you.

“I said I wasn’t going to be good, especially after you misbehaved so badly earlier. Tell me, little hunter, have you used that mouth of yours to something other than pointless arguments?” Sukuna leaned back on the throne, spreading his thick legs and undoing the knot on his robe. The angle you were in gave you a pretty good look on what you were going to be working with.

If there was a source of light behind Sukuna you would have his dick casting a shadow on your entire face.

“Sukuna…” you called his name in scared tone, all your confidence fading out as you noticed from up close the thick veins.

“Do I really have to teach you everything?” he pulled away from the throne backrest getting closer to you, roughly taking your wrist and turning your palm up.

When you met his eyes he had a mischievous look, he snorted leaving you wondering what about your expression he found funny.

Then he spited in your palm and made you wrap it around his length.

You couldn’t help but gasp, such a dirty act and still your thighs were pressed together as hard as you could to get some friction on your core.

You had no idea what the average size was, but Sukuna was definitely above that. Your fingers weren’t even close to touch, how were you supposed to…?

“Come closer” he spread his legs, Sukuna was back to his original position, back against the rest, looking down at you like you were a bug. You noticed the frown was gone, like he was more relaxed.

You obeyed, moving more into the middle of his legs your face now just inches from his dick.

His hand guided yours up, stopping before the head and going back down encouraging you to squeeze his base, his chest was rising faster as you learned the way he liked it. You approached the dark red tip, giving it a kitten lick to test waters, a satisfied groan from the devil made your face heat up.

“Don’t be shy” he placed his hand on the back of your head, pushing you down his hard cock as you put your hands on his thighs for support.

Sukuna pulled you back before he hit the back of your throat, when your lips reached his tip you sucked it and felt his hand closing and pulling your hair.

“Liked the taste?” he teased. You would never admit it out loud… but you did. The bitterness of it and his scent made you high.

Being a virgin you didn’t expect a cock to be so hot. Literally. You felt your cheeks burn just being this close to his hot skin.

Your tongue traced the underside of his length, the warmest point of him. Out of curiosity you reached for his balls too, they ehere even hotter and so heavy.

Sukuna adjusted his hips, tilting it a little but enough to make you gag on it.

“Open wider” his rough hand held your face, index and tumb forcing the sides of your jaw to stretch more. It hurt, you wined, sinking your nails on his thigh, “Relax…”

You’ve read porn before, you know what you’re supposed to do, in theory.

“I need to buy cigarettes, you can wait here” Aki told you when you reached a convenience store.

“I’ll go in with you” you replied, while Aki went to the counter you walked to where the maganize were. You picked the newest edition of a popular one, flipping through it you found an interesting article. It was a reader question for the recurring sexologist. My husband never comes when I suck him off, what should I do to improve my head game?

You brought the magazine closer, not fully reading the answer but just scanning your eyes over the words that stood out the most.

Create a vacuum by pursing your lips… focus on the frenulum… suck the balls… swallow when it reaches the back of your—

“You buying this?” Aki was suddenly beside you, your head was basically inside the magazine, thankfully shielding the content.

“No, there’s nothing good” you closed it quickly and put it back.

You should’ve come back for that.

Taking a deep breath you tried to relax your throat as Sukuna applied pressure to the back of your head, as soon as his thickness reaches the very back of your throat your eyes fill with water.

“That’s it, choke around my cock, little hunter. Allow me to bruise that throat of yours” he bucks his hips and you realize you have almost no control over it anymore, just surrender to the situation. A mixture of liquids accumulated on your chin, almost dripping.

Sukuna love this more than he should, you looked so helpless. But those eyes didn’t deceive him, he could see the lust, the hazy look and your delicate hand under his balls told him the secrets you didn’t.

“You’re such a whore, you know that?” you swallowed, “You know why?” he bent, one hand still on the back of your head and the other around your neck, he pushed you until your lips were amost at his base. All the heavy meat of his cock down your throat.

Your teary eyes looked up at him, the hand on your neck closed around it, Sukuna could feel his own shape through your skin. You eyes widened realizing you could barely breath.

“Because good girls don’t take dick like this” he trusted a few more times until you felt it twitch, your hair was aggressively being pulled but the hand around your neck kept you in place while he shot hot loads down your esophagus.

“Eat it” he commanded and you obeyed, shutting your eyes and swelling it, although it was a lot.

Sukuna pulled you away, mesmerized by the string of cum and saliva connecting your mouth to his cock.

You inhaled for the first time since this started but soon began to cough, your jaw ached and your legs were numb beneath you.

“Monster” you managed to murmur in a extremely husky voice.

“Please” he was catching up his own breath, through blurry eyes you could see his abdomen was sweaty, his thigh was slightly shaking. Sukuna bent, supporting his elbows on his knees to get really close to your messed face, his huge hand approached your face and out of reflex you fliched, but with a delicacy you would never expect he removed the strands of your hair that got caugh in your wet face. The sudden act made your face soften, he ran a thumb over your swallowed lips, rubbing the saliva off, he looked at you with a proud smirk. You felt vulnerable at that moment, his eyes didn't seem dangerous, and he was so close you couldn’t help but close your eyes and reach for a kiss.

You found nothing.

Opening your eyes again you saw the tiles of your bathroom, finding yourself naked on the floor. Droplets of your wet hair ran down your back, you took your towel off the floor and wrap it around your shoulders and attempted to get up, groaning from the pain on your knees. The groan scratched your sore throat and you started to cough again, moving to the sink you lowered your head trying to get some water but the image in the mirror scared you. There was a clear imprint of a hand around your neck, you traced it in shock. You thought about what to say tomorrow at work, should you wear a scarf?

But the most important question was: how deeply involved were you with Sukuna now that he had literally marked you?

#sukuna x you #jjk x reader #sukuna smut #chainsaw man x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #sukuna x reader #csm x reader #jjk smut #sukuna x y/n #devil!Sukuna

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