😵‍💫

I haven't done lists in a while and there's a lot pilling up just this week so it's time to bring it back.

1. I'm revisting Old Hollywood again now that I've watched most of the films nominated for Oscar this year. The Be Kind Rewind youtube channel has been sort of the trigger for going back to the past and for that I have to thank @shimako for the recommendation 🩷 I've watched the 2 hour and a half video essays on the Valley of The Dolls and the behind the scenes story is far more interesting that the film itself.

Not to say that the themes addressed in the film wouldn't be, like disillusionment in Hollywood, personal grievances, what it means to be an actress and especially not a really succesful one. It reminded me of Didion's Play It As It Lays (which I think it's a better piece of literature although the film adaption seems to have turned into a failure?)

2. Anyway, that made me go down the rabbit hole and watch other essays on Ruth Gordon (amazing woman) and Katharine Hepburn.

3 . Speaking of Hepburn, I realized yesterday that I've only seen her paired on screen with Cary Grant and not with Spencer Tracy (I know!). So I rectified that mistake and I watched Adam's Rib (George Cukor, 1949) and I finally understood what all the fuss was about and I have some sort of theory. Grant and Hepburn together are like this very performative version of a couple in which the constant bickering takes center stage, but even when they do get together, it lacks something. A bit of authenticity. But with the Hepburn-Tracy duo, you can almost feel it. It's right there in the small, natural gestures. Instant chemistry and love. They work so well together. I guess the off screen affair of 26 years helped that as well.

3. I love Mommy Dearest and Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford. The screaming, the crying, the makeup, "No wire hangers!". Poor baby Christina. It's a shame though that Faye Dunaway distanced herself from it because of how "bad" it turned out, but I understand why she felt she had to do it.

But I also couldn't help but think of DeNiro in Cape Fear and his own campy performance in a very 90s ridiculous film that allowed Scorsese to try his hand at that type of thriller. DeNiro's career didn't suffer because of it, as opposed to Dunaway's version of camp, which I prefer actually. It may have been hated at that time, but Mommie Dearest is a cult classic.

*Bonus: Currently listening to another You Must Remember This podcast series. It's Gossip Girls: Louella Parsons and Hedda Hopper, aka the famous old Hollywood gossip columnists.

Now, for some ridiculous internet & showbiz drama:

4. People going conspiracy mode over Kate Middleton? Some of us lived months without any sign from Jimin. They could learn from that. But love the memes.

5. I feel sorry for those kids in Glasgow. They really experienced the effects of AI used by assholes who wanted to make some money. The lady in green hair has been all over twitter and whilst funny for us, it is shitty to be in her shoes. The Unknown! 🤦‍♀️

6. Who was an ass to Rebecca Ferguson on set? The consensus is that Jake Gyllenhaal was the culprit and I wouldn't be surprised. But it needs more investigating.

7. Over in K-Pop Land Karina gets a boyfriend, her fans are devasted and Koreaboo is pumping "articles" by the minute. What else is new?

8. Stans of all types are stanning and fighting. One day 🐥 girlies, the next day 🐰 girlies and all the other crazies all week long, no break. I do read the stuff in my inbox, but I'm really not in a mood to comment on every shitty thing that happens so often. I know that once I do it, then I just invite more and it's just pointless. There's no actual JM and JK which is frustrating enough and no travel show on the horizon and it's just too bleak at this point.

We're waiting, clock is ticking. At least release a travel show as a summer content, ok?

9. I did see that Billboard kpop 100 top. Yeah, I don't understand the logic of including individual artists if they haven't charted on their own. Don't these people have editors to point out the flaws in the listicles? It's just dumb.

innocence - 32

PAIRING: bodyguard!bucky barnes x innocent actress!reader

WARNINGS: drunkness, nightmares.

NEXT CHAPTER

    - Sharon? 

There she stood, in all her elegant and precise posture dignified of someone who had been trained to be a spy. Y/N had spoken to Sharon before yet it had been brief so all she knew about her was what she had learned from the media and what Bucky had told her. Yet, Bucky wasn’t one to share much about his life as a Winter Soldier or an Avenger. Despite all this mystery surrounding the woman standing in the kitchen, she trusted her. She was Bucky’s friend and Steve’s girlfriend, a decorated scholar and agent. If she wanted to hurt her the chance was very, very low. Besides, she doubted Bucky would’ve just gone around giving people his address. He doesn’t even tell anyone but the barista his coffee order, not that it is too hard to guess.

    - Bucky asked me to look after you while he’s gone. - she said before Y/N could even question her. - He said you’d feel more comfortable with a woman watching over you.

    - He really left, uh? - Y/N knew he had left, after all his dog tags were hanging from her closed fist, but her more optimistic self, the more happy look which wanted to believe he was gonna be told this was mistake and he could return to the normal life he had paid by with blood, sweat and tears.

    - Do you wanna go for breakfast? There’s a nice spot just a few blocks away from here. - she tried to distract her, kind smile forming. - I always thought you and me should get to know each other. You know, Steve and Bucky are like brothers so we’ll see each other a lot. 

     - Yeah, I hum ... I just need to get dressed. - Y/N wanted to be her happy, cheery self and she knew Sharon was only trying to make her feel better but all she could think about was Bucky and if he was safe.

She knew she was no super soldier, no super spy, not a witch or an agent but she just wanted to help him. She was already helpless in her own life, merely following along as others guided her, too afraid to step too much out of line in fear of losing what she had worked for. After all, many people wanted what she had, many people wanted a contract with a household agency thus she had to be compliant. She had to step on the breaks before she even turned the key. However, if there was something she had agency on it was her relationships and she wanted to help him. God, she wished to never see that look, the look he gave her that morning after that call. It was pure sorrow mixed with anger and she wondered how long he’d felt that way. She wondered if anyone had tried to help him rather than weaponise him. It was not her choice to decide what Bucky wanted to do with his life, it was not her right to demand him explain her demons to her but it was her choice and her pleasure to be by his side and right now she wanted to be by his side. Even if her mother had raised her not to rely on a man. It wasn’t relying on him, it wasn’t being only completed when a man was around, it wasn’t her feeling incomplete whenever he was around. No. It was none of that. It was merely wanting to hold the hand of someone who had for the longest time not had anyone to hold his hand. It was loving someone so much, she’d be okay with holding his burden with him even if he didn’t want to. It was merely loving someone, darkness and light, and she loved him. 

Her hands gripped the sink of the bathroom, eyes gazing onto the mirror in front of her and as such her own face. She watched every line, every corner, contour and shadow of her face, the dog tags softly dangling around from her neck, the only part of him she had near her. Y/N splashed cold water against her face, trying to let her own optimism flow into what was now a negative outcome. She stepped outside of the bedroom, a soft smile drawn on her features.

   - Should we go? - Sharon suggested, grabbing her coat which was laying over the couch. - It will make you feel better, Y/N. 

   - Yeah, I’m just ...

   - He’s one of the best operatives in the field. - Sharon interrupted her. - He will be fine, I promise you. 

   - You can’t promise me that. - she said as she took her own jacket from the hooks on the wall.

   -  I’ve seen him fight before, Y/N. I’ve been where you are, it’s shit but ... you gotta trust someone who’s strong enough to carelessly break a brick, will be fine. 

Sharon meant well, she knew she did and she was glad she was there but Y/N felt nothing but completely numb to what was happening around her. It seems as he had left with her heart and now she was longing his and hers didn’t get broken in the middle of HYDRA’s crossfire. She didn’t know much about HYDRA or even the Winter Soldier, her parents had shielded her and her siblings from the bad of the world and while she had seen Washington in the TV and remembered when Captain America had been regarded as a traitor, she had never been explained much about HYDRA and all that was out in the internet was glossed over with a paint coat of big, bad monster. Funny how big, bad monsters don’t look like monsters at all. She’d not even been in the country when the first modern Winter Soldier attacks had occurred and she was younger, much more naive. What she could remember was circled with rumours of politicians then blaming every single event on the soldier, turning him into a folklore-like creature but he was not folklore, he really existed. Conscious or not conscious, he existed. She didn’t know how Bucky felt about it, he’d never tell her but what she knew was that he drew a line between who he had been and who he was now, and he hated to cross that line.

The harsh sound of the coffee steamer from the coffee machine took her from her own head. The coffee shop itself was mostly empty, highly due to it being later in the morning and all she wanted to do was return to her bedroom and stay there until she had to go for her photoshoot. However, the waitress was already taking their orders which meant she had to at least stay here until the two of them had eaten whatever Sharon had prepared. 

   - How do you do it? - Y/N blurted out, clearly losing any control over her mind to mouth filter. - The missions ... I mean, Steve must be going on them all the time. 

   - Well, whenever I don’t go ... it’s hell. - she smiled tightly. - One thing is going on a mission yourself, the other one is someone who you love going. And for what? Crocked politicians? 

   - I get a feeling you’re not a big fan of the government. 

   - You’d be right. So, what’s the schedule for today? Bucky didn’t really explain what your job entails.

   - There’s a photoshoot today at 3, then it’s free days until Monday where I have to go on set to film the last scenes. 

    - Photoshoot? Sounds fun. 

    - The Virgin Bride for Vogue.

    - Oh ... - she agent scrunched up her face. - Not so fun.

    - They’re doing an issue on the types of brides. You know ... because type casting not only occurs in Hollywood, it occurs in life too. You got your bridezellas, your over 30 brides, your rebel brides and the virgin bride. Being the virgin bride does fit with the image they want for me. 

     - I never really understood type casting, if I’m being honest. You know, the rat, brit, brat pack. Never really made sense.

     - It’s a marketing strategy. It is easier to market someone as a type rather than a complex person.

She liked photoshoots, she mostly got to dress up and get photographed almost like a big makeover like in those 90s movies she still curled up against her comforter to see. This particular one did make her upset, to be in a white wedding dress, surrounded by soft white fabric was particularly cruel. She knew her wedding was not going to be what she dreamed of a kid and unless she wanted to get her agency or the government in the business, the two of them would’ve had to get married in the civil hall. However, it did not matter to her where she got married, it mattered that the person she wasn’t engaged to was not here. It was almost like being dressed as a left at the altar bride ... like a widow. 

She unpinned the veil from her hair, taking off all the heavy jewellery that had been used to adorn her hair and put it on top of the desk where all the makeup was still open. The dress was pretty but it was big, it was too big, it almost swallowed her, it made her feel small but it reminded of him. She wondered where he was, what he was doing, how he was feeling, if he was safe.

    - That was boring. - Sharon said as she stepped inside the dressing room, holding two coffee cups. - I know that look. What’s wrong?

    - I hate this dress. - Y/N sat down in the chair. - It’s too big.

    - You look like a wedding cake.

    - Right. - Y/N moved the fabric up playfully. - I don’t think I can even move correctly. 

    - You should be thinking about your own soon. - Y/N gave Sharon a confused look. - Steve told me. Don’t tell Bucky, he’ll get upset and then Steve will be upset, big mess.

    - Well, it’s good to be able to speak to someone about it. - she smiled. Only Bucky and her parents knew, so she did not have many people to tell she was engaged to or to even speak about it. 

    - So, how do you envision your wedding dress?

    - Oh, I don’t ... I don’t really think about it. It’s most likely gonna be in city hall so it’s not worth it.

    - What? That’s bullshit. Everyone wears a dress. 

    - I can’t really go anywhere ... the paps would go crazy and that’s the last thing I need.

    - Still, everyone wears a dress even if they go to city hall.

Y/N merely shrugged. Her head was not in the right space and for the first time she was looking forward to go to set. It didn’t matter if being on set was dehumanising sometimes, it mattered that her head would’ve been somewhere else. She knew that as a perfectionist, her mind would be on finishing those scenes and not on Bucky. As she got home, she couldn’t help but get lost inside her mind again as Sharon put some old sitcom on the TV. She was surrounded by him, by memories of him, things that reminded her of him. Looking to her left there were framed photos of him, his jacket was still hanging from the door, the broken shards of porcelain were still on the sink. There were pieces of him everywhere and half of her felt ridiculous it was affecting her so much as it was but she loved him. She loved him.

    - Right, get your jacket. - Sharon got up from the couch.

    - Why? Where are we going?

    - You will see.

Y/N followed Sharon through the half lit Brooklyn night down to the back of several shops. The lights flickered, illuminating the bins filled with black plastic bags which laid in the back fronts of several shops. She watched as Sharon made her way towards a particular store back, taking a key from under a seemingly unseeingly rock which opened the heavy pad lock keeping the door shut. Sharon motioned her head towards the door and Y/N followed her into the dark shop. The agent closed the door behind them before she turned the lights. The bright white lights illuminated the shop floors and she noticed she was surrounded by hundreds of glass see through closets with various white dresses. Was she in a bridal shop?

    - You need to take your mind out of him. - Sharon sat against one of the pale pastel pink couches laid around the store. 

    - Is this legal?

    - You’re engaged to Bucky Barnes, how come you care about legality so much? 

    - I don’t want to get arrested, Sharon.

    - It’s one of my friends bridal store. You said you couldn’t do it without paps walking around and photographing you, so ... here you go.

    - I ... I don’t ... What if he doesn’t come back? - Y/N’s lip trembled as she crossed her arms and looked to the side.

    - Y/N, he will come back. It is one man against a soldier with the strength of five. Trust me, if not for anything else, he’ll come back to you. Now, dress, what dress do you want?

    - I don’t know. 

    - Come on. Pick one and try it on. We are not going home until you try a dress on.

    - Fine.

Y/N stared at the dresses, grabbing the first one she could find in her own size and dragging it onto the dressing room. It definitely was not her type of dress, at least not the type of dress she had envisioned getting married in. It was pure white, sleeveless with a cut which went down to her sternum, skin tight, hugging her body in a flattering way but it just wasn’t her dress. It wasn’t the dress she wanted to get married in, but right now it wasn’t the time to think about what dress to wear when Bucky was out. She shouldn’t be playing dress up. 

She waddled back to where Sharon was sat before she stopped in front of her, hands on her hips. Somehow, she had found some prosecco and plastic flutes and had her feet on top of the pale pink couch. 

   - Are you happy now? - Y/N sighed, mostly out off nuissance. 

   - Don’t give me that tone. - Sharon sipped from her own flute, handing Y/N the other one. - Come on, what do you think?

   - It’s ... uhm ... fine. - her hands gestured around the fabric.

   - What? That’s the first one you try. Why aren’t you crying? It isn’t the one if you’re not crying. That’s what they do in the movies.

   - I can cry.

   - No, spin. - Sharon waved her finger around and Y/N spun around slowly. - It ain’t it.

   - But Bucky ...

   - From now on every time you say the words James, Bucky, Buchanan, or Barnes, you’re drinking. 

   - But I don’t know if Bucky ...

   - Drink. - Sharon interrupted her. Y/N scrunched her face not really believing her but she looked dead serious. She took a sip of her prosecco, placing the flute on the table near her. - Come on, what does your wedding dress look like.

   - I don’t know ... I don’t want something skin tight, I want some floofy fabric.

   - Yeah, go on.

   - And I don’t want it to be too long, I want my shoes to show ... like Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face.

   - Let’s find it. 

Both she and Sharon went through tons and tons of dresses, through so much lace she was sure to dream about it for the next week until they found something that resembled what she wanted. Y/N ended up rather dizzy on the prosecco, not used to drinking too much, running around barefoot with the dress that was her dress in a rather subdued white which showed her legs from the ankle down, a voluminous little shirt which cinched at her waist. A rather short veil fell from her head, pinned to the crown of her head with a fake baby pink rose prong clip. The two ended up laying on the pink couch, heads leaning against the rather comfortable pillows as they nursed the rest of the bottle of prosecco.

   - Okay but I have a question ... - Y/N said, bringing her flute down. - Is it weird dating the same guy who kissed your great aunt?

   - Listen, Steve is a kissing whore. - she tried to say it with a straight face but ended up breaking into laughter. - It’s true. He’ll kiss anyone, unstoppable. The blonde girl from the army, my great aunt, Natasha. If it hadn’t been for me, Steve would be Captain Kisscam instead of Captain America. 

   - Captain Kisscam. What superpowers would he have? 

   - Making people kiss each other? No that sounds terrible. I don’t know ... to be honest what even is Steve’s superpower?

   - Ultimate ... - Y/N broke down laughing before she could continue. She put her hand in front of her chest, taking a deep breathe as she tried not to laugh at the joke in her head. - Ultimate frisbee.

   - You know? Sex on top of the shield? Terrible, so uncomfortable.

   - Sharon!

   - What? I was curious, it is a weirdly unbreakable shield, isn’t it? Besides, that’s not even the craziest thing we’ve done.

    - What’s the craziest thing you’ve done?

    - We did it at the Smithsonian.

    - SHARON! There’s children there. It’s ... a hall of science, and ... memorabilia ... and ... I don’t know, I’ve never been to the Smithsonian.

    - Oh, c’mon. What’s the craziest place where you and Bucky have done it?

    - You said Bucky, drink. - Y/N pointed her flute at Sharon.

    - So did you. Drink. - the two girls drank what was left over in the glasses, throwing them to the side. - Come on. Tell me.

    - I don’t know ... What are we counting as doing it?

    - 3rd base.

    - I do not understand bases. 

    - Handjobs don’t count. 

    - Oh ... then ... the parking lot of the set in his car. 

    - And the car didn’t break?

    - Come on, it’s not that old of a car.

    - It’s ancient, Y/N. - Sharon chuckled, passively looking at her watch to check on the time. - We should get going before the shop opens.

She went back into the dressing room to take off her wedding dress. It wasn’t until then she realised she was still wearing his dog tags, the cold metal against her warm skin, a side effect of the alcohol coursing through her veins. She was reminded of him again on that moment, wondered how he was doing, how he was feeling. She hoped and begged he was okay in her mind, and the memory of him haunted her mind even as she laid down in bed to go to sleep. There was a direct line from wedding gowns and dog tags to her fiance and wherever he was. Her blood distracted by the unhinging of the alcohol coursing along it, was filled with hate. Not for him but for his situation, for how helpless she was to helping him. 

She turned around in her bed, forcefully shutting her eyes as a way to ensure she went to sleep instead of dwelling on those thoughts. However, she simply didn’t have a choice to leave. As her consciousness dissolved into unconscious she woke up in the same bedroom but the environment was blurry, very highly saturated yet the colours were candy bright. However, the environment wasn’t inviting at all and soon broken through the candy bright atmosphere she could hear screaming. She tried to untangle herself from her sheets, running through the bedroom yet her movements were slow and her running was more like a slow motion run. She pushed open the door, coming face to face with the same candy coloured blurred bright world but in front of her was him but not him as she knew him. Not at least as she had known him. His hair was much longer, slightly past his jaw which was covered by a mask, a muffle. His clothing was restricting, the top almost resembling a straightjacket, as if he was dangerous. He was so close but so far away, on his knees with someone whose face was blurrier than the atmosphere itself.

   -  Don’t worry. - the blurred person’s voice was as distorted as the vision, mechanical even as he rose a gun up to the head of a Bucky Barnes she had never met. - We will help you.

   - NO! - she lunged forward as the gunshot echoed through her ears and like a rubber band she was pushed back to reality. She rose her torso from her bed in pure agony, eyes wide open and red, hand holding the sheet against her chest which rose up and down in fast paces.

Looking around, nothing was candy coloured and everything was clear. The room was dark in muddled shades barely lit by the moon light peaking from the small rips in the curtains Bucky had first gotten when he first moved in. Everything was as it was, his sleeping shorts were still hanging from the chair next to the dresser, the dead flowers were still in the vase he had once put them when they were fresh. Everything was as it was, yet she couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was lurking. The feeling that both of them had just crossed the bridge past the point of no return. 

taglist: @disasterbii @lookiamtrying @buckysteveloki-me @americasass81 @jamesbarnesappreciationclub @lostinthebeans @mariahthelioness29 @oh-nohoney @peaches-roses-sins @theadorasabditory @sipsteacasually @saiyanprincessswanie @booktease21​ @noiralei​ @learisa​ @everythingisoverratedbutgreat​ @uglipotata72829​ @naturalthrone22​ @husherstan​ @mandiiblanche​ @vicmc624​ @newyorkgoddess​ @itsallyscorner​ @chipilerendi​ @emzd34 @writerwrites​ @bluevxnus​ @that-girl-named-alex​ @captnrogers​ @nsfwsebbie​ @sarge-barnes-sir​ @niki-is-a-thing​ @cynic-spirit​ 

Chapter Six. 

SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 13.8k

WARNINGS: sexual content

come talk to me about wtsgd! i’d love to know your thoughts! 

January 4, 2018 

With every article of clothing that flew from the closet, Harry neatly folded each piece as he laid them flat in Luci’s suitcase. He remained seated on her beige rug, leaning against the side of her bed with an open luggage that was sat next to him as he intently listened to her ramble nervously about the new adventure she was about to take on. 

Luci had a flight tomorrow morning that was quite early for her own liking, and she was just now packing her belongings. To be fair, she had been busy meeting Samantha for extra discussions about work, and she even met her new manager, Thea, who had been so excited to meet her and manage her. Thea was a forty-two-year-old woman who had quite the experience in being a Hollywood manager. Her and Samantha were a dream-team, as they would like to call themselves, for a few years now and they’d managed to raise the newest stars up on the Hollywood sign itself. Their work was promising, and Luci put her trust and her career in the hand of the two women. 

For the past three days, Harry and Luci had been spending as much time with each other. They were saddened to be together for only three days, which was the exact amount of time they’d officially been in a relationship. But they were making the most of their time with making dinners together and sleepovers since that was the only available time Luci had since she had been so busy during the day. Harry was lucky school wasn’t back in session yet so he could put his full attention on Luci. 

Once her luggage was filled with all different types of clothing and shoes, Harry closed it for her, rolling it over next to the front door before grabbing the duffel bag he lent her and dropping it next to the luggage. It was nearing ten at night and Luci had to leave for the airport at four in the morning since Thea had booked her flight for six because she was going straight to the studio to meet the rest of the cast and do table readings. 

Harry found Luci leaning against the countertop with her back towards him. He could tell just how tense she was because of her anxiety and nerves that were boiling in her body; her shoulders seemed like they were frozen because of how tense she was, and he knew her neck started to ache because she kept rolling her head around to relieve the pain. All he wanted her to do was relax, and he could only do so much to help her ease the nerves. 

He’d learned that Luci’s love language was words of affirmation, indicating that she needed constant reassurance. It seemed fitting because as an actress, she always wanted feedback on her work; plus, she was always one for needing validation for every single thing she was proud of. And Harry seemed like the perfect guy to give her that reassurance because he loved uplifting her mood, hyping her up, and making her happy. 

Pressing his chest against her back, he wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his chin against her shoulder. His hands rubbed her lower stomach, and just the mere touch had made her relax as she loosened up in his arms; he held her up tightly so she wouldn’t have to anymore. 

“You okay, baby?” He asked, knowing it was a dumb question, but he always wanted to make sure. 

“Yeah, I’m alright. Just nervous,” she responded, even though he had already known. 

He kissed her cheek, and Luci melted. “You’re gonna do amazing, I just know it. The producers were so impressed with you that they wanted you to be in their movie. No one could deny your talent, Ci, I can promise you that. You’re fucking marvelous.” He had said the exact words that Luci needed to hear; she smiled, caressing his tattooed arm with her soft hand. 

“Thank you, baby.” She turned her head to the side, meeting his lips before planting an appreciative kiss for all that he had done for her. 

“C’mon, wanna show you something.” He unwrapped his arms, making her turn around suspiciously before leading her into her bedroom. 

On her bed was a photo album that had a brown leather exterior with black trimmings to protect the edge of the book. They both sat on the edge of the bed as they looked down at the front of the album. 

“This is just a little something that I thought you would appreciate,” Harry said before handing it to her. 

Luci slowly opened it to the first page of the album. Taped on a thick white construction paper was the Playbill booklet of the show, along with Harry’s ticket that he purchased next to it; at the bottom had the date of the night Luci had performed for the first time in Harry’s handwriting. On the back of the first page was every single good review everyone had to say about Luciana Suki. The reviews were cut out into strips as he tried to fit as many reviews as he possibly could on the square paper. When Harry was glueing the reviews on them, he left out about ten critics because they simply couldn’t fit on the paper; a sense of proudness had washed over him because Luci was just a likeable person along with her amazing talent—no one could not like her, 

Flipping the clear plastic sheet protector, the next page was Halloween, where Harry printed the pictures Nina had taken of them. He did not forget to write at the bottom of the page that it was Luci who had asked him out, along with the date. They both laughed once they read it because it was a memory they simply would never forget. 

On the back of the Halloween page was their first date. They had taken a selfie in front of the sunset, moments before their first kiss, capturing their well-spent day together. Along with their picture was the fair food Harry had taken, imitating a food blogger; a picture of Luci with wide eyes, staring into the camera as she took a bite of her food. Harry had smiled, heart fluttering after he’d taken the picture. 

The last page was recent; the day Harry asked her to be his girlfriend. He’d managed to make a copy of the photobooth strips since he wanted to keep the real ones on hand. The date he asked her was written in between the third and last picture as those were the exact moments he’d asked her and she said yes. 

The scrapbook was the most sentimental and thoughtful gift Luci had ever received; the time and effort Harry had put into making the entire thing showed within his creative scrapbooking skills, and it was the sweetest thing anyone had ever given her. 

“Harry…” her eyes were blurry from the tears, threatening to fall out. 

“This’ll be our little memory book. I know it’s very early in our relationship, but I just want you to know how much you mean to me, and that I’ll look back on these memories and smile because we had the best times. And I’ll keep this going and fill it with all future memories and your accomplishments because I’m so incredibly proud of you.” He delicately took her face into his hands as if he was holding a piece of art as he caressed her soft cheek with his thumb. Luci’s tears had hit his finger, overwhelmed with how much adoration and admiration Harry was giving her. 

“Thank you. I…adore you so much.” 

Far too early to say those three words, she settled for the second closest thing that verbally told him how she felt, but her feelings were just as close to the real thing, no matter if it was too early or not. 

Harry blushed. “I adore you, too.” 

Just like her, he felt those three words swimming on the tip of his tongue. His heart was beating unbelievably fast for how early their relationship was, and he made no effort into slowing down his heartbeat because he quite liked how she had that affect on him. 

Gently, she connected her lips with his. They kissed and swirled their tongues together as the electric spark ignited inside of them. Luci held onto him as tight as she possibly could, savoring his presence, his touch, his closeness since she would go months without any of those things. 

He pulled away from their intense and passionate kisses, making Luci pout and he quickly pecked her lips, kissing her frown away. 

“Can I show you how much I adore you?” 

The question had caught her off-guard. “You wanna…” 

“Only if you’d let me. I wanna take care of you,” he said genuinely. It didn’t take Luci long to nod yes. “Let me hear you say it. Please, I need your words.” Harry pleaded. 

She looked at him intently before she softly said, “Take care of me, Harry.” 

Her words only brought him relief before he kissed her cheek and pushed at her shoulder to lie back. Luci got comfortable as she laid in the middle of the bed; Harry had moved his lips down to her neck, kissing and nibbling at her skin but not hard enough to leave a mark. She softly moaned at the feeling; his lips had affected her quite a lot, and it always left her wondering what else he could possibly do with those pink lips of his and she was finally going to find out. 

Harry settled in between her legs, which she was quick to welcome him. He was hovering over her, kissing every bit of exposed skin that he saw as his hands were toying with the hem of her sweater. 

“Can I take this off?” He asked, referring to her sweater.

“Yes.” She nodded.

Harry lifted her sweater, chills entered her skin as her warm sweater was taken away from her and thrown to the side of the bed. The newest bit of skin that he hadn’t seen only made him want to kiss every inch of her, to learn and memorize every crevice and dip of body. Eagerly, he kissed the valley and tops of her breasts.

“You’re so beautiful, Luciana,” he complimented. There was something about Harry telling her that she was beautiful and adding her full name with it that made her feel like snow on a warm day; she had melted entirely just by his statement.

He took her hardened nipple into his mouth, sucking and licking and pulling at it. Luci’s hand met his hair, scratching his scalp lightly as she let out soft breaths of air. Kissing down her body, her eagerness heightened as she subconsciously bucked her hips slightly into his torso as she felt Harry smirk against her stomach. 

“Don’t laugh,” she said, looking down at him. Harry looked up as her elbows were slightly propped up against the bed with a smile that matched his. 

“Not gonna laugh, baby.”

“Okay…” she dragged out, her tone teasing. 

Continuing, he kissed the skin above the hem of her leggings before he asked if he could take them off, and she said yes. Kneeling on the bed, he took off her dark grey leggings as her legs went straight up; she was left in her cotton nude underwear, and Harry felt like he could come on the spot. He’d truly never seen someone so beautiful until he met Luci, and his admiration for her had only increased. 

“Stunning. Gorgeous. Every fucking synonym for the word ‘beautiful.’” He was amazed by her beauty, and he clearly wasn’t afraid to let her know. He loved the way she looked when she was shy and flustered, and when her cheeks would heat up too much for her own liking. But Harry thought she was absolutely adorable when she was feeling those emotions. 

“Harry, you’re too sweet.” 

“Mm, and I bet you are too?” He raised his brows, a smug smile appeared on his face. Luci bit one side of her bottom lip before she licked her lips. 

“Then why don’t you hurry up and taste for yourself.” In all honesty, she was impatient, and she was eager to feel his mouth against her. 

Harry chuckled, grabbing one of her ankles as he pressed a kiss to it, trailing his lips along the inside of her legs. He felt the goosebumps that had pricked her legs, and he loved having that sort of affect on her. Once he got to her thigh, he put her leg down and laid on his stomach in between her legs before proceeding to kiss up her thighs. 

Satisfaction was handed to him when he heard Luci heavily breathing through her nose due to his heavy and teasing kisses when he hadn’t even touched her where she wanted it the most. 

“Baby, please.” Luci’s tone was desperate as her arousal only increased, anticipating the relief she was going to feel once he touched her core. 

“Alright, alright. Since you said ‘please.’” He removed her underwear and dragged them off her legs. The sight and scent of her only salivated his mouth, only ready to devour and pleasure her to the fullest. His blood had rushed below his waist, slightly straining against his sweatpants. “Fuck, aren’t you a sight.” Luci felt shy and intimidated under his stare, causing her to close her legs, but he was quick to stop her before she closed them all the way. “No need to go shy on me, Ci. Just admiring your beauty because you’re absolutely marvelous.” She thanked him, a small smile found her face. “Now, can I please get a taste?” He asked once more. 

“Yeah, make me feel good.” 

He kissed the crevice of where her thigh and vulva met before he licked her clit. A spark was sent through her body as he continued licking, sucking her sensitive bud into his mouth, pulling back slightly. 

The feeling of his mouth on her was everything she ever hoped for. She had been so stressed about the changes that were happening quite quickly that made her feel on edge and extra needy. Especially when Harry was her boyfriend, looking extra good, she was particularly eager to jump his bones. 

“Mm, yeah, like that.” She moaned out, bucking her hips against his mouth as the tip of his tongue rimmed around her entrance, collecting and tasting her arousal. 

“Taste so good, fuck. Could be down here for hours,” he said before he boldly licked a long stripe from her weeping hole to her clit. 

He took his thumb and rubbed the bud, making her jolt because of how sensitive she was already while taking his middle finger, lubricating it with her wetness before inserting it into her hole. He pumped in and out, curled his finger, and caressed her walls, all while slowly rubbing her clit in circles. Harry earned a throaty moan, and since his hands were occupied, he finally had a moment to really look at her and take in her appearance on what he was doing to her. 

His beautiful girlfriend had her legs wide open with her back arched. She let out a string of moans and a series of curses as she placed her hands on her tits, kneading the flesh and playing with her nipples to only add to her sensitivity and pleasure. 

Harry was rock hard once he had a taste of her, but seeing her playing with herself, touching herself was the cherry on top. As if he could help it, he bucked his hips against the edge of the mattress as he let out a soft moan of relief, even though he’d rather have Luci touch him herself. 

“Harry. Harry. Harry.” She chanted as if it were the last and only thing she knew. His name off her tongue sounded like poetry—so sultry, so sensual, and so seductive. He never wanted another person to say his name again because for all he knew, Luci had possession of it. 

“C’mon, baby. Get there. Get there for me, yeah?” He never once stopped his movements, and he would beat himself up over it if he did. 

“Another…finger.” Luci requested, and he complied. Adding his index finger right next to his middle, he curled both of them up in sync, hitting the soft part of her upper walls and her g-spot. 

He relentlessly hit her sweet spot over and over again, and it had Luci moaning loudly; her sounds bounced off the walls of her room, going straight to Harry’s ears. Just as Luci was, he was on the edge as well; he continued rutting his hips against the mattress and wanted to release so badly, but he was waiting for Luci’s pleasure to wash over her. 

Replacing his thumb that was rubbing her clit so graciously with his tongue, he flicked his tongue up and down in a fast motion as he kept fingering her. She was quick to respond to the change as she tightened around his finger. 

“When you’re ready, baby, come for me.” 

Those were just the words that she needed to hear; her breaths were staggered as they were caught in her throat. For a moment in between the anticipated orgasm she’d been waiting for, she looked down at Harry because she knew that with just one look at him, she would combust. And when she did, Luci met his jaded eyes that were looking so hopeful for her release, like he was hungry for it. Her mouth fell open, disconnecting her vision from Harry as she threw her head back onto the pillow while her orgasm had tickled her skin into a toe-curling, back-arching, and loud-moaning pleasure that took her breath away. 

The rough tugs of Harry’s hair from Luci’s hands and the taste of her orgasm on his tongue only gave him the release that he was working for. He moaned against her core as the vibrations were sent through her body, making her shake. Harry’s hips slowed its movements as he breathed heavily through his nose, licking and tasting every drop that Luci had to offer him. 

Harry rested his head against Luci’s thigh; they both were catching their breaths from their orgasm as soft huffs came from their mouths. She propped her elbows up and looked down at the gorgeous man below her who was pressing kisses to her inner thigh. Running a hand through his hair, Harry looked up and she gave him a sweet smile. He crawled onto the bed, still in between her legs as he propped down onto her chest; Luci giggled at his adorableness. 

“You’re…,” she couldn’t finish her sentence as her orgasm made her speechless. Harry planted his elbows next to her, coming face-to-face with Luci before pressing a kiss to her lips. She could taste herself on him as she swirled her tongue with his. “Thank you.” 

“Anytime, anywhere, Ci. I should be thanking you, though.” Luci tilted her head in confusion. “I, uh, seemed to have taken care of myself also,” he said bashfully as her eyebrows raised. So, that’s what all the moaning and heavy breathing was about, she said to herself. “I’m sorry, that’s kinda embarrassing-”

“No.” She immediately stopped him. “That’s not embarrassing at all. That’s actually pretty fucking hot.” She reassured, the corner of her lips turning up. 

“Really?” He’d never came before while eating someone out, but he’d been so captivated by her sounds and her taste that he couldn’t help but let himself go. 

“Hell yeah, baby.” She placed a hand on his cheek, pulling him in for a kiss. Their kiss didn’t deepen or lead to anything more than just sweet affection; it was enough to ease all of Harry’s worries away. 

Once they giggled and shared a few kisses, they cleaned up and refreshed themselves for bed. Harry’s ability to make her feel incredibly good had made her forget that she had a flight to catch early in the morning; and it would take her away from Harry for four months. Her sadness and anxiousness had begun to settle once they finally got comfortable under the covers—more so, Harry was comfortable as Luci was anxious. 

Despite the dreamy orgasm, her body was tense against him, and he’d felt it easily. He turned his head to look at her, and her mind was present; she stared up at the ceiling, toying with her fingers as she rolled her foot in circles, her ankles occasionally cracking once they returned to the starting point. 

“Hey,” Harry broke her away from her thoughts; Luci looked up at him. “You okay?” 

She nodded, though he could still sense her unsureness. “Just sad…nervous,” she admitted. 

Harry lowered himself on the bed so he could be leveled to where she was laying. They shared a pillow, which they’d done plenty of times and left no room for the ‘cold side of the pillow.’ But it was intimate and sweet, and a mix of both their scents combined. 

“Tell me what you’re thinking?” He asked softly. 

Luci took a deep breath before she started. “Everything’s happening so fast, and it’s making me nervous. I-I just don’t want things to completely change.” 

“Nothing’s gonna change, Ci. And if it does, it’ll be for the better. Your career is gonna take off and you’re gonna star in so many amazing films and shows. That’s what you wanted, right?” 

“Yeah…” The one thing on her mind had been bugging her for the past few days, and it drove her up the wall once she thought about it too much. But the only way for her to put her gear into reverse and come down from that wall was to tell him the truth. “I don’t want anything to change between us.” 

If he was being honest, Harry had thought about that quite a bit. Hell, he’d thought about it even before he asked her to be his girlfriend and when they were just friends. He had thought about how when Luci was famous, their relationship and friendship was bound to change. Would they still be together? Would they still be friends? Would she forget about him and forget about their time that was spent together? So many questions had scrambled in his brain that all of the overthinking thoughts felt so familiar to him. 

But he wasn’t going to spew out every single one. 

Instead, he kept an optimistic attitude about their relationship. 

“Nothing’s gonna change, alright? We’re gonna get through this. And if things do change, we’ll work together to adjust to it,” he reassured, although he was unsure himself. He didn’t want to add more fuel to the fire Luci had in her head at the moment because that would only make things worse. Plus, she had a flight to catch early in the morning, and she really needed to rest now. 

His words seemed to calm her mind down, and she was grateful that one of them was stable enough to comfort the other. So, she nodded, taking what he said to heart. They were gonna get through this, and she put her whole faith on them. 

She murmured a ‘thank you,’ feeling too tired to talk any more as it seemed her head had exhausted her. She got comfortable next to Harry, tucked away in his side as her fists huddled up the material of his sweater, wrinkling the area. Harry rubbed her back, soothing his girlfriend for a little before hearing snores, thankful that she was able to sleep with no trouble. 

He lied awake in a complete daze as the only thing on his mind was Luci and how amazing she was without the complete knowledge that their relationship was definitely going to change. 

It had been two weeks since Luci left for California, and Harry had never felt more alone in his life, not even during the times before he met Luci. He knew it would only get better with time, but he’d gone months talking and seeing her almost everyday until this moment. 

She made sure to text him whenever she got the chance to, which he was relieved about. Her texts had always provided a sense of comfort and happiness to him whenever he saw her name on his phone. Each greeting was filled with excitement and longing. Whenever it just so happened that Harry was busy and Luci was available, she’d text him ‘I miss you,’ along with other types of messages that practically begged Harry to get a glance at his phone to see who was blowing up his phone. 

Their new long-distance relationship was unfamiliar as neither of them had ever been in one before. It was unspoken how they handled it, besides from the basic ‘call or text me when you get the chance.’ However they knew they’d face the problem head-on together. 

“Alright, everyone, hope you all have a great and safe weekend!” Harry announced once the loud bell rang before them. “Make sure to catch up on all your readings, please. You know who you are,” he said in a teasing tone. 

He sat down in his black chair that swiveled and reclined, great for his back; a few of his students had asked him a few questions about their essays once he sat down, which he was happy to help and glad to see that they were using their time to ask him questions. He said ‘goodbye’ to the last student who was exiting his classroom and wished him a ‘happy Friday.’ 

Pulling out his phone from the top drawer of his desk, he smiled as his phone lit up, seeing a message from Luci that was sent thirty minutes ago. 

Finished with table reading :) Might go for some drinks with the cast. Hope class is doing well! 

Quickly, he typed back. His fingers seemed to take over, hoping she’d see his message before she puts her phone down for another few hours. 

Hi, baby. Just finished with class and gonna head home in a bit. Are you up for a call later tonight? No worries if you can’t and you’re out. x 

Harry set his phone down once he didn’t see the bubble pop up as he looked at their message thread for two minutes. He figured he could get some grading done and impute the student’s grades into the system so he could distract himself and make use of his time. 

Every five minutes, he would pick up his phone, and once he saw that there was no text from Luci, he’d put it face down and get back to work. He did that for the next two hours, and ended up staying until four, grading papers and constantly checking his phone. 

A knock on his classroom door had made him whip his head towards it, finding his colleague standing in the doorframe. 

“Not going home any time soon?” Carina, one of the math teachers, crossed her arms and smiled a bit. She was one of the first teachers Harry had made friends with and one of the closest in the school. She’d been working at the middle school for three years and had introduced Harry to the staff once he started teaching. Harry had to admit, he had the slightest bit of crush on Carina as her red hair and green eyes seemed to attract him. 

They hung out a few times, mostly inside one of their classrooms during lunch. Harry even developed the tiniest crush on her, only because Carina was a new person in his life and she was quite nice. 

There had been one Friday where Harry invited her to his apartment, and they popped a bottle of wine and talked and drank. She was nice, Harry thought. But the wine had gotten the best of both of them and they soon found their lips pressed against one another. Harry thought it was nice to kiss someone, but as Carina pulled his hair and stuck her tongue into his mouth, he realized that his crush for her had disappeared instead of heightening as it was supposed to. So, he stopped her by pulling back, explaining that they couldn’t do that anymore and that he was sorry. He truly didn’t want to lead her on. Luckily, she was understanding and told him that she was going to head home. 

But to his surprise on her way out, they ran into Luci who was just unlocking her door from a night out. On the inside, he was freaking out because his new neighbor had caught him red-handed—the neighbor he thought was incredibly beautiful. And he found himself completely drawn to her, pushing his feelings for Carina out of his body and welcoming the new profound feelings he had for his neighbor. 

“Uh, I’m not sure yet,” he answered. 

“Okay, well, since it’s still early, I was wondering if you’d like to hang out?” She asked confidently. Carina had always been quite confident and was a people person. Harry, on the other hand, wasn’t so much a talker when it came to new people; it really depended on that person’s vibe. 

He weighed his options in his head. He so badly wanted to talk to Luci tonight, or whenever he got the chance, and he was afraid that whenever she did text back, he’d be hanging out with Carina and not giving her his undivided attention because he hated being on his phone when hanging out with someone. 

“Uh, maybe next time? Sorry, I’ve been-”

“No, it’s okay. I get it, you don’t have to explain. Have a good weekend, Harry.” She smiled, although he could sense the defeat from rejection inside before she walked down the hall and away from his classroom. 

Harry felt bad, honestly. He didn’t like disappointing people or making them feel like what Carina probably felt. But he just hoped that his rejection still made them friends because he wasn’t really close to anyone in the teaching staff. 

A big yawn took over him for a moment as he stretched his back and arms into the air before he decided it was time to go home. He hadn’t had much plans after Luci left, seeing as most of his plans for the weekend involved her, and he hoped that he could at least hear a snippet of her voice tonight to help fill the void of her presence. 

But when Harry got into bed at eleven at night, he’d lost hope, and would try again tomorrow. It was minutes of tossing and turning, not finding the right position for his liking. So, he accepted his discomfort and laid on his stomach, arms and legs spread across the mattress. After a few moments of lying in silence, his phone began to vibrate against his bedside table. He looked at his phone that was face down on the wooden table, the slightest bit of light shining from the edges. Sighing, he decided to take a look at who might be calling him, and his heart skipped a beat when he saw Luci’s contact picture and name plastered all over the screen. 

Quickly, he pressed the green button to answer. “Hello?” 

“Harry!” She said loudly against the speaker phone. He could hear chatter around her and utensils hitting the glass plates, so he assumed she was at a restaurant. 

“Hi, love. How are you?” 

“I’m good.” She dragged the word ‘good’ out, giggling at the end of it. Luci had been drinking for a few hours now, casually sipping her drink that was barely enough to get her fully drunk as everyone was talking amongst themselves and eating. But one of her cast members had bought continuous rounds of tequila shots, so she was now to the point of drunk—tripping over her step, finding everything funny, and wanting to talk to her boyfriend. “I miss you.” 

“I miss you more, love. I’m so happy I get to speak to you, even if it’s just for a moment,” he said honestly. He truly believed that not talking to Luci up until he slept at night was the reason why he was up, completely sleepless. 

“Me too. I’m sorry I didn’t text you back…” she said softly as she stood in the middle of the hallway of the restaurant that led to the restrooms. 

“No worries. I’m glad you’re having a great time, though. That’s all that matters to me is that you’re happy.” His genuinity made her eyes full with tears. She wasn’t usually someone one who cried when she was drunk, but just hearing Harry’s voice and not being physically next to him made her emotional. Sue her. 

“I am having a great time. Just wish you were here.” 

“Me too.” 

“Miss everything about you.” 

Harry smiled, laying on his back with one of his arms propped behind his head. “Yeah?” 

“Mhm. Missed your hugs, your kisses, your eyes, your lips. Swear, they’re the best lips I’ve ever kissed.” Her voice was low, not wanting the people who passed her to hear what she was saying for Harry only 

He couldn’t help but blush at her flirting. Even over the phone and on the other side of the country, she still managed to make him blush while his heart flipped. 

“Well, now you’re just flattering me, baby.” His accented voice that was crackled through the phone had sent a chill down her spine, making her bite her lip as she leaned against the wall. 

“I’m being serious!” She exclaimed, talking over the loud clatter of plates and glasses as the restaurant was cleaning up for closing. 

“What else do you miss about me?” Now, he was just teasing. It stroked his ego to hear her tell him everything she’d missed about him; it made him feel good inside. 

“Missed…” she paused for a moment as she was unsure if she should say such a thing in public. 

“C’mon, tell me, Ci,” he encouraged. His tone was pleading, and if she were right in front of him and not across the country, he’d be on his knees in front of her just by how he presented his words. 

“Missed you between my legs.” She curled his lips into her bite, preventing herself from biting her lip as she might accidentally seduce someone that passed by. 

Harry smirked. “Yeah? What do you miss about that?” He heard her sigh, and he knew that she was trapped under his spell that he’d miraculously casted from New York. With that certain memory, he constantly thought about it. The sounds she made. The way she tasted. How she felt in his hold. It made sure she was tattooed in his mind. 

“Missed how you made me feel good; how your mouth and fingers felt inside of me.” Her voice itself was enough to get Harry’s cock to twitch inside of his sweatpants as it was extra raspy because she was trying her hardest to keep her volume at a low level. Now, she couldn’t stop confessing everything she missed about him, and who was Harry to tell her to stop? “I miss the way you would lick me, how you would tease me a little even though it drove me insane. I missed the way your hair felt between my fingers, and when you would moan because I pulled at them roughly. I, especially, miss the way you made yourself feel good and how you came just from seeing me come. That was my favorite part of that night.”

She crossed one of her legs over the other as she squeezed her thighs together. Her words had given her blinks of flashbacks from their last night together; and oh, how she so badly wanted to make that moment last. Harry was fully hard underneath his pants, and he tried his hardest not to relieve the straining pain. 

“Fuck, baby. You have no idea how much I miss you.” 

“Promise me you’ll show me once we’re together again,” she demanded, and a smug smile appeared on his face. 

“That’s definitely a promise, Luciana.” 

There he goes again with her full name, Luci thought. Before she was about to respond, she saw the group get up from their chairs from her peripheral view. 

“I’m looking forward to it, baby. I-I gotta go.” Their chat had sobered her up just a tad bit, and the wetness of her panties had slightly woken her up, wishing Harry was there to take care of her. 

“Alright, love. Get back safely, please, and text me when you get back to the house,” he requested softly, not necessarily wanting to know her every location but to know if she’s safe. 

“Will do. I…adore you.” 

Harry smiled. “I adore you so much more.” 

With that, they hung up. Luci said goodbye to her coworkers before getting into an Uber to Thea’s home, where she would be staying for the time being; and Harry relieved himself by touching and making his hard-on go away with the thought of Luci in his head and how she tasted, which made him realized that he was going to need another taste of her so she wouldn’t disappear on his tongue, 

After three weeks of rehearsals and getting to know each cast member and crew on set, Luci was exhausted. Ocean’s Eight was mostly going to be filmed in LA, where the production had a set built, but she anticipated the two to three days where she gets to be in New York to film in the Met Museum. So, being in the same state as Harry only excited her further. 

It hadn’t even been a month yet nor had they even begun shooting for the film, but getting through table reading, rehearsals, and an entire run-through of how the movie was going to be filmed was taking a toll on her physical health. She felt like she hadn’t slept properly, or had gotten a good amount of sleep ever since she left New York; and mentally, she was missing her family and Harry. 

Her family had always made sure to check in with her to see how she was doing because just like Luci, they shared the same excitement for the first movie she was acting in and missed her dearly. She continued to make contact with Harry, but it wasn’t as much as she would like to. Work had been so busy for her that whenever they started to have a decent conversation other than the usual ‘hi’ and ‘how are you?’, her break would be over and she would have to walk away from her phone, which was the closest she’d been to Harry in three weeks. 

It was almost five in the evening on a Wednesday night when everyone had wrapped up for the day. Sighs of relief were heard through everyone as they all knew that rehearsals were over and sometime within the next few days, they were going to start shooting. 

Luci packed up her belongings, taking an extra water bottle for the road before she said goodbye to everyone and headed out of the studio. It was a chilly evening as the soft winds brushed past her while she quickly made her way to her car that she’d rented out. The white Honda Civic keeping her safe on the roads of Hollywood was nothing like the subways of New York, but it was a nice change since she hadn’t driven in a while. One thing she absolutely hated about driving in LA was the traffic and the aggressive drivers in said traffic; and all Luci could do was groan, saying that they weren’t going nowhere with that kind of traffic. It’s always the Prius drivers who’re reckless, she thought. 

Just as she was about to get inside the car, one of the producers, Jane, had called out for her, catching her before she drove away. 

“Hey, Jane. What’s up?” Luci rolled down her window. 

Jane took a deep breath, catching her breath. “I’m glad I caught you before you left. This is the new schedule for next week with all the scenes that are scheduled for each day. You’ll start filming in a week, so you have a small break. So, you’ll come back here for a few days to film a few scenes as needed, and then, we’ll be off to New York, and back here again.” She explained. 

With her eyes wide, Luci took the freshly printed schedule that had a calendar outline until the end of April. Jane had highlighted her scenes, in which she’d have to go on set, and it seemed like she was booked until April. 

They talked a bit more about some scenes, and Jane let her know that she may need to be on set even if she wasn’t filming but her actual start date for shooting was a week from now. They bid each other ‘goodbye’ as Jane told her that she’d see her next week, and Luci had a surge of happiness rush through her as she headed back to her temporary home for the next few months. 

Unlocking the front door, Luci stepped into the dark hallway as she immediately kicked off her shoes and hung her coat in the closet right across the front door. She quietly tiptoed to her room down the hall, her feet covered in fuzzy brown socks that padded along the wooden floor as she made her way straight to the bathroom to shower off the long day she had. The scalding hot water hit her skin as she washed her scalp and used her coconut-cream body scrub that she’d been using for years, lathering up the suds and spreading it on her skin. 

Once she finished in the bathroom, she headed over to her bedroom, pulling the soft pink comforter back before she laid down on the mattress as a breath of relief took over. She shifted towards the left side of the bed, towards the figure that was sleeping on her side; the familiar scent engulfed her senses. 

She pressed her chest against his back, wrapping her arm around his waist as she placed a soft kiss to his neck that was exposed from his t-shirt. Her worries had washed away once she took him in her arms; the amount of comfort she found was astonishing, but she was grateful for that comfort. 

He shifted and turned around in her arms, making her pull back a little bit as to not wake him from his slumber. He was now face-to-face with her, eyes closed as his eyelashes fanned out against the top of his soft cheekbones while soft breaths puffed out of his mouth. Carefully, she pushed back his floppy hair that had landed in his face, and she admired more of his beauty. 

After a few moments, he moved once more but this time he felt a pair of arms around him, making him jolt as a way to wake himself up. Luci stared at him with an amusing smile on her face as she watched him wake up to realize that she was in front of him. 

Blinking a few times, his vision cleared and what he saw struck him—he felt like he was dreaming, though he's not complaining if this was a dream. 

“Luci?” 

“Hi, Harry.” She responded, a smile plastered on her face as her eyes glossed, from what he could see in the dark room. 

“W-What are you doing here?” He leaned against his elbow, slightly sitting up to fully wake himself, testing to see if this really was a dream. 

“Came to see you.” Luci simply stated, brushing the side of head. Harry’s eyes were droopy, confused, and still sleepy. 

“But…how-”

“Shh, we’ll talk when we wake up again, okay? It’s, like, five in the morning.” Harry had no energy to protest, but he also didn’t want to sleep because if this was an actual dream, and the next time he woke up again and Luci wasn’t holding him, then he would be very sad and disappointed. 

As the minutes passed by, the two found themselves laying together and looking at one another; neither of them spoke a word as they basked in the silence and beauty and elegance they found in each other. The moonlight hanging far up in the sky and the distant lights from the city as a few people were getting an early start of their day was seeping through the curtains of the small window in Luci’s bedroom. 

And this moment, dream or not, they held each other tight as they let exhaustion and sleep take over them. 

The next time he woke up, Harry woke up in a frantic, gasping for air as his lungs shook him awake, begging to breathe. He looked over at the window, seeing that it wasn’t dark anymore but it was bright out in the cold and blue atmosphere. Recollecting his dream, he turned his head to the space beside him but there was no one next to him; the sheets were wrinkled and cold as he must’ve shifted around a lot in his sleep. 

The time read 10:23 a.m on the bedside table. There was a moment of panic because it was a school day, but he remembered that he took the day off and called a substitute teacher in advance. 

Groaning, he rubbed his eyes, grabbing the large glass of water on the bedside table before chugging the entire thing to fulfill his thirst. He walked to the kitchen to grab some more water until he saw his girlfriend in a wrinkled Whitney Houston tour t-shirt and some sweats as she flipped a pancake on the stove. Luci was swaying her hips, humming a tune, and Harry realized that she had earphones in, so she hadn’t heard him walk in. He stood still for a moment, wondering if this was another dream, but he wanted to act upon his thoughts where he would attack her with hugs and kisses, but disappointment would seep through him once he realized it actually was a dream. 

But this wasn’t a dream. He wasn’t blissfully in his slumber, dreaming about his girlfriend. This was very real. The sharp sting of his fingers pinching his arm had reddened his fragile skin; he purposely bumped his elbow against the wall, hitting his funny bone as he bent down in hysterical pain; he gently slapped himself a few times until he realized this was all real. 

Finally, the corners of his lips turned up as he walked to stand behind Luci. He placed the glass on the counter in front of her, making her jump as she turned around, pressing her lower back against the edge of the white countertop. She took out her earphones, setting them aside as she smiled, finally getting the chance to properly greet Harry. 

“You’re here,” he said, bewildered at the thought. He turned the dial of the stove off before placing his hands on the edge of the counter, trapping her in his arms. 

“Yeah, I’m here. Thought I said ‘hi’ to you when I got here, no?” She tilted her head as she looked up at him, running her hands up and down his arms; goosebumps enraptured on his skin. “Happy birthday,” she greeted; he thanked her, though he had almost forgotten it was his birthday. He hadn’t even checked his phone since he’d woken up as he was sure there would be plenty of texts from Anne, who was most likely getting emotional that her baby was getting older; and Gemma, who was having a blast that was turning twenty-eight since he always teased her for getting older. But the first thing he did was find Luci. “Oh, and happy one month.” 

“How…” 

Luci chuckled because he still seemed to have the same reaction when she’d arrived. “I was informed that I don’t start filming until next week. So, last night, right after rehearsals, I booked a flight out here to see you on my time off, just in time for your birthday.”

“Wow, I…” Harry was speechless. “If I’m being honest, I thought that was a dream. I was sad to see you weren’t in bed when I woke up.” He pouted dramatically. 

Luci chuckled. “I’m sorry about that. For the new few days, I’ll make sure to stay a little longer until you wake up. Speaking of, I’m glad to see you made use of my spare key.” She raised her brows teasingly. 

When she left three weeks ago, she’d given Harry a spare key to her place just in case anything happened, so he would have access to it. She also told him that he was allowed any time in her apartment whenever he felt like it, so a couple of times a week, he would let himself into her place and sleep in her bed. Her scent that was displayed all over the pillows and the entire apartment had brought him some sort of comfort, but her sweet fragrance couldn’t compare to her presence where he could wrap his arms around her body instead of a pillow and her comforter. 

Harry smiled bashfully. “Well, you did say…” 

“I know what I said, and I don’t mind it. I think it’s really adorable that you sleep here sometimes.” Luci pulled the sides of his t-shirt, bringing him forward so he was closer. “Now, can I get a proper kiss hello? I’ve missed you.” 

He smirked, pressing his front against her before he took her face in the palms of his hands, leaning down as Luci tiptoed, they placed a loving and tender kiss to each other’s lips. Neither of them knew how they'd gone so long without the other’s touch because once they kissed each other, they couldn’t stop. 

Everything seemed to align when they felt each other’s touch; the day seemed to get brighter, the birds chirped louder like they were singing a tune, and their admiration was stronger than ever. Every emotion and word was told through their kiss, and it was a kiss of longing and yearning.  The pure desperation to compensate for the time that wasn’t spent kissing; a kiss that simply said ‘I missed you. Please don’t let me go this long without your lips.’ 

Matching swollen lips and a flustered state that was plastered on their faces seemed to be the theme of Luci and Harry’s reunion as they pulled back to catch some air. Harry quickly took her lips into his again before he bit down on her bottom lip, pulling back slightly, making a throaty moan escape from her, which ultimately caused Harry’s cock to bloat up. 

“You can get more than just a kiss ‘hello.’” Harry muttered against her; Luci inhaled sharply. “I did promise you a little something once we were together again, right?” He challenged, a smug smile emerged on his face. His thumb caressed her cheeks, and she wrapped her hands around his wrists. 

“You did.” She confirmed. “But it is your birthday, so I think I should take over today, no?” Her voice and words were doing everything right to his body. He felt every single word she spoke, and her sultry voice was going to be a broken record in his mind every single day. All he did was nod, not trusting his ability to speak. “Words, Harry, I need your words.” She’d said his words that he used when they were last together, when it was him who made her feel good. 

“Yeah, take over, baby. Please.” He was completely under her spell, physically and mentally luring into her. Luci reached up to give him a brief kiss before she pulled his arm, leading him to her bedroom. 

The back of thighs hit the edge of the bed, and she gently pushed at his chest so his back landed right in the middle of the mattress. She climbed onto the bed, legs astride his thighs as she began to kiss his neck, leaving a small hickey on his skin that he would admire until it faded. Playing with the hem of his shirt, she pulled away, giving him a devious smirk. 

“Can I touch you?” She asked, looking so intently in his eyes. 

He nodded. “Please.” His dreams and fantasy were coming to life as his mind had been filled with Luci’s body and touch when his nights were extra lonely. He didn’t need to fulfill himself with the minor satisfaction when Luci was prepared to do that for him as she lifted his shirt up, exposing his tattooed torso to her sight. 

Harry took off his shirt, throwing it onto the floor before watching her become so immersed with his body. The permanent ink fascinated her, and she delicately touched the tattoos that were exposed to her eyes like it was a prized possession. Leaning down, she planted a kiss to the swallows on his collarbones, trailing down to the butterfly that was plastered on his stomach; Harry’s breath hitched as he felt himself get hard underneath her. She then licked down to his lower abdomen, where his happy trail lied between two ferns; and she opened her mouth and nibbled on the skin in between his laurel tattoos, making Harry internally groan at her tasteful teasing. 

Running her fingers along the hem of his sweatpants, she asked him if she could take them off, to which he breathlessly responded: “Yes, please. Take everything off.” 

His cock rested on his stomach while Luci took in his large size. Her mouth practically salivated at him; and she was eager to get him in her mouth, to get him inside of her. But she wanted to take her time to appreciate and admire his endeavours. 

“You’re beautiful, Harry,” she complimented genuinely. Harry looked down at her, and just as he was about to thank her, her tongue licked the base to the tip of his needy cock, earning a loud exhale from him. 

She slipped the head of his cock into her mouth, sucking and tasting the pre-come that had spilled out of the tip, swirling her tongue all around. Harry moaned, throwing his head back onto the mattress as he gripped the sheets harshly, wrinkling in his hands. 

Luci took him into her mouth further, holding back the urge to gag. She breathed through her nose as she bobbed her head up and down while raking her fingernails on his torso, increasing and adding to the sensation. 

“Fuck, Ci.” He breathed out, panting. The slightest bit of embarrassment took over him for a moment because he felt like he was on the edge of an orgasm; it had been way too long since he’d felt another person’s touch, another person’s mouth on him. 

Pulling him out of her mouth, a string of saliva followed as it connected to her bottom lip and the middle of his cock. “Like that, hmm?” She asked, batting her eyelashes at him flirtingly. 

“You have no idea…” he trailed off, burying his hands into her hair. He didn’t mean to rush her into blowing him again—all he wanted to do was touch her, and the closest thing was her head—but Luci took that as a sign to continue her movements again. 

“Fuck my mouth.” She requested. Harry’s eyes widened, not expecting to hear that from her; but everyday, she surprised him. “Please. Want you in the back of my throat.” She was trying her hardest to take him further than she would like, but she couldn’t quite reach that point. “Think you deserve that, birthday boy.” 

Harry inhaled sharply, containing his demeanor as a smirk landed on his mouth as he sat up, sitting on his knees. Luci’s feet were planted on the floor as her upper body was laying flat on the mattress 

He leaned down so his mouth was next to her ear as he whispered, “Best birthday ever,” before giving her a quick kiss. Luci placed his dick back into her mouth, wrapping her lips around his tip as she waited for him to take over. Harry tangled his fingers into her hair before slowly bucking his hips forward as he slid into her mouth. Placing her hands on the back of his thighs, she pushed him further, urging him that he could go faster; Harry complied. 

Harry felt like he was on top of the world, like nothing else mattered except for this moment right here. It was like he was in between the soft clouds that could be matched for the blanket and mattress underneath him; like he was looking down at the nature and beauty of the world conform to the beauty of Luci below him; like he was screaming at the top of his lungs his secrets for the world to hear, which corresponded to the filthy words he was spewing out and his loud moans that filled the room up; and it was like the world was screaming back at him, which was a wild Luci moaning around him, sending vibrations up his body. 

He was feeling everything all at once. 

And he fucking loved it. 

When he pulled back to check on his girlfriend, she gasped for air. She had tears in her eyes—a few had streamed down her face—her lips were swollen, and her hair was a mess—and Harry absolutely loved it. Luci kissed up his body, meeting his lips as she gave him an eager and sloppy kiss. Their mouths connected, and he tasted himself on her tongue with the side of Luci. The best flavor ever. 

“Want you so bad.” Harry managed to say between the heated kisses. 

“Have at me.” She moved past him, laying down on the bed before she quickly stripped her clothes off, throwing it onto the floor where it landed next to Harry’s clothes. 

“You sure? Thought you wanted to take over?” He smirked teasingly. 

“Unless you wanna take over, I’m very sure.” She reached into her bedside drawer to grab a condom—an unopened pack of condoms and a bottle of lube. “Mind if we use lube? I know I’m pretty wet, but I don’t know if I’m that wet, and I want you inside of me already and I want it to feel good for the both of us.” 

“Of course, baby. Whatever you need to feel comfortable, feel free to do it.” He kissed her reassuringly before smirking, wondering how long she’d been waiting for this moment. 

He grabbed the foil packet, and rolled it onto his aching cock that was begging for a release. Grabbing the water-based lube, he squirted some of it onto his hand and rubbed it on his length before running his hand up and down her slit, and to her sensitive nub as he circled his finger, making her mewl. He settled in between her legs, placing his arms near her shoulders as he hovered over her, kissing her sweetly. 

Asking her once more if she wanted to push through with it, she gave her consent, grabbing his dick before lining it up with her entrance. Harry slowly pushed in as Luci gasped at his size; he was stretching her out so well that tears pricked her eyes, the overwhelming invasion of his girth and length had made her pant. 

Once he was fully in, Luci looked down in between them, seeing he was balls-deep inside of her; they both moaned in unison. 

“Baby…you’re so big.” She squeezed around him, causing Harry to hiss, gripping her hips tightly. “Move, please. Need to feel you.” She couldn’t count the amount of times she’d dreamed and fantasized this moment; her fingers and her vibrator weren’t cutting it anymore. 

He began to thrust; her arousal lubricated his dick even more as he smoothly slipped in and out of her. Leaning down, he took her breasts into his mouth, licking and sucking as his hand fondled the other before switching. Luci slipped her hand in between their bodies, touching and rubbing her throbbing clit; Harry smiled at the sight. 

“You look so fucking pretty touching yourself, Ci. Making yourself feel good?” She nodded, closing her eyes as she threw her head back. “Am I making you feel good?” Harry’s thrusts began to quicken as his hips slammed against the back of her thighs. “Tell me.” An urgent praise needed to fill him, and her filthy words needed to be spoken. 

“So good, H. Fuck…” she continued rubbing at her swollen nub as the tip of Harry’s cock brushed against her g-spot. “There. Right there. Please, don’t stop. You’re so fucking good.” She cried out into the air as he continued his movements, sweetly hitting her special spot. Unexpectedly, she grabbed one of his hands and wrapped it around her throat, covering his large with hers as they squeezed her neck together. 

Harry felt like he could come right there and then at the sight of their hands wrapped around her neck. He felt her squeeze around him once more, making him groan. 

“Pretty girl, Luciana. Can’t get enough.” Even in her filthy state, she still managed to get shy at his words, making him chuckle. “Don’t go shy on me now, baby. I’m fucking you, and now is the time you get shy?” He squeezed his thumb a little bit more into her skin, feeling her pulse point that was quickly pounding hard. He took his other hand and rubbed at her clit since she stopped due to all the sensations she was feeling at once. Luci began to involuntarily buck her hips, moaning louder than ever. “C’mon, Ci, give it to me.” 

After a few more thrusts, a few more rubs, and a few more squeezes, she came so intensely that she saw stars. Part of it was because she was lightheaded, but her orgasm had washed over so powerfully that her body began to slightly convulse. Harry came into the condom a few moments after as a raspy groan filled the air. 

Once they calmed down, Harry gently pulled out of her, taking off and throwing the condom away in the trash before he laid down beside Luci. He pulled her exhausted body to his chest, and they laid there for a moment, regaining their energy back before they could greet one another. 

Luci was the first one to break the silence. “Happy birthday.” 

“Thank you, baby. Happy one month.” He brushed her hair out of her face, placing a kiss on her forehead. 

“Happy one month. So many more to go.” 

Harry smiled at her words. He felt a certain reassurance once she’d said that, like he wasn’t the only one feeling the intense and quick feelings that laid between them and their relationship because he truly felt like their relationship was for the long-haul, and she felt the exact same way—no matter if they’d only just started dating. 

So many more to go. 

“I have your gift,” Luci said, detangling herself from his arms. They’d been cuddling for the past twenty minutes, talking about random things that came to mind. 

“You didn’t have to get me anything.” Harry sat up against the headboard as she opened her luggage, pulling out an burnt-orange knitted sweater. 

“I should’ve wrapped it, sorry, but…” she handed the folded sweater to him. “Happy birthday.” 

“This is so cute! I love it.” His fingers touched the soft material, observing the details and the stitching. “Thank you so much.” He held her hand, gently pulling at it so he could place a kiss to her lips. 

“I’m glad. I’ve been knitting it since October, and finally got the chance to finish.” Harry’s eyes widened as he felt his heart swoon at the fact that she was doing something entirely sweet and thoughtful for him before they were even dating. 

“I truly love it. Thank you, Ci. Your talents continue to surprise me.” Luci smiled, nodding her head as she thanked him. Looking at him with bright eyes, she saw the world within him. She was so insanely lucky that Harry was her boyfriend, the guy that she met the day she moved in; a certain fondness fell over her. 

For Harry’s birthday and their one month celebration, he wanted to take Luci to his favorite Chinese restaurant called Tasty Plates, two blocks away—the restaurant that he bought food from for Luci’s birthday. He wore the sweater Luci gifted and made for him since he was quite excited to wear it one of his girlfriend’s creations. 

Upon entering, Luci noticed a very friendly atmosphere as the employees chatted with their customers as if they’d known one another for years, which they probably had. The smell of fresh and authentic Chinese food filled her senses, and she could already feel how home-y this place was. 

The restaurant was a self-seated restaurant, so Harry led her to one of the tables next to the wall that had frames upon frames of pictures and signatures of famous celebrities, athletes, and chefs that had the privilege of visiting the restaurant. 

“You’re gonna be up there one day.” Harry interrupted the intent observing that she was doing to the wall. 

“Hmm. You think so?” 

Harry nodded his head as if it was the most overt belief. “Absolutely. Being on this wall is, like, equivalent to having a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. I already know they’re gonna have a picture frame bigger than all the others because they’d want everyone to see your picture.” 

Luci smiled, appreciating the sweet compliment as she reached across the glass table and held his hand. They chatted for a bit before one of the waitresses, who was also the owner, had taken their order. Kai, greeted Harry with a wide smile, glad that he was able to visit their restaurant. Harry introduced Luci to Kai, to which he earned a teasing expression from her; Kai practically knew almost every detail of Harry’s love life since the day he entered the restaurant, and Harry really didn’t mind—Kai provided him with some of her wiseful advice on relationships since she’d been in plenty of them in her time; but a piece of advice that really stuck to him was when she said ‘You’ll meet hundreds of people as you grow older, but you’ll know when you’ve met the right person. And if there’s anything that I’ve learned, it’s that when you have that person, don’t let them go because you’re going to regret it.’ Kai was speaking from personal terms, and she proceeded to tell Harry the story of when she met her husband, the co-owner of the restaurant, and how they went years without talking and loving, which were the most difficult years she’d ever went through. 

And Harry carried that advice everywhere he went. 

Kai brought out their food in a record-breaking time, saying that since Harry was her special customer, he got special treatment at the restaurant. The three joked around, laughing and teasing before Kai left their table, allowing them to eat. Luci excitedly told Harry everything about work—her cast members, famous actors and actresses along with producers that she’d met on set, and her upcoming schedule. She was glad to have someone to share this information with, aside from her family, and just the thought of telling Harry everything excited her. 

“I’m pretty booked until the end of April…” she mentioned. 

Harry looked down at his food before looking back up at her. He noticed a certain look that she carried, and it was a look of guilt. He placed his chopsticks on top of his bowl of rice before he grabbed her unoccupied hand, holding and caressing her skin. 

“Talk to me,” he said softly. He didn’t want to assume what she was thinking; he’d rather hear her voice her thoughts. 

“I feel bad, y’know. I mean, we just got together and we’re not even spending time with each other because it’s my fault-”

“Nothing is your fault,” he objected. 

She looked at him sadly. “If you think about it, it kinda is. Harry, we’re spending our one month anniversary when we haven't seen each other in three weeks. What the actual fuck is that?” 

“Well, I know you’re not going to quit the movie; plus, I wouldn’t let you.” He pauses for a moment, furrowing his eyebrows, mouth turning into frown as if a realization had just hit him. “Unless this was a mistake-” 

“No!” She shook her head, and Harry immediately felt bad because she looked like she was about to cry. “This will never be a mistake. One of the best choices I’ve ever made when I asked you out.” She reassured him. “It’s just…we’re supposed to be in the honeymoon stage, y’know? How could we do that when I’m always working and on the other side of the country?” 

Harry understood, he really did; and he didn’t know the way to answer her question since he didn’t know the answer himself, but he tried his best and said, “Well, then that just means when you come back home, we’ll still live through and be in the honeymoon stage four or five months from now.” And that answer seemed to satisfy her as she smiled, looking down at her lap as her cheeks heated. 

Drifting away from the serious topic, they enjoyed the rest of their lunch by talking and laughing. 

“What’s your mom like?” Luci asked, wanting to everything about him. 

Harry’s heart fluttered. “Her name’s Anne. She’s great—one of the kindest women I’ve ever known.” Luci smiled as she listened to him talk about his mother. “She’s done a lot for me and Gemma, and even though we’re older now, she would do everything and anything for us all over again. That’s just the kind of person she is—selfless, kind, and definitely knows how to crack a joke or two.” He smiled at the memory of when he was a child and how his high-pitched laugh would come out when Anne would joke around. 

“Is that where you get your love for jokes?” 

“Definitely. Can’t say I have better jokes than her or else we’ll have a joke battle.” Luci laughed; she loved listening to him talk about his family. His face lit up every time, and he had a smile that replicated his childhood photos. 

They talked for an hour before the conversations were coming to an end as a comfortable silence was washed over them. Kai brought out custard tarts, which she knew were Harry’s favorite Chinese dessert, that was on the house. They thanked Kai for their wonderful food, service, and for the dessert before Luci paid, tipping extra. 

Kai told Harry that he’d better not be hiding Luci because she really liked her, and hoped that he would bring her back soon. Harry promised, even Luci said that she would visit even when Harry wasn’t with her, which made Kai very happy. 

Back at Harry’s apartment, they ended up cuddling on his couch and eating ice cream together before he turned his body towards Luci and asked, “Can we talk about this morning?” 

Luci turned her head towards him, raising her brows. “You mean when we had sex?” She wondered, and he nodded. So, she put her finished bowl of ice cream on the coffee table in front of them before giving him her full attention. 

“I just wanted to know what you thought of it. Feedback is very much appreciated.” He smirked.

“Are you saying that so I could feed your ego more than I already do?” Luci teased. 

“Maybe…” 

She chuckled. “I liked it a lot. Sex had never felt like that before,” she responded honestly. No matter how many times she had sex before Harry, how many partners she’d slept with, Harry was undeniably the best one; and she thinks it was because he was her boyfriend, but either way, there was this compelling connection between them that had their minds and bodies were on the same page. 

“I agree. But I also wanted to ask if you were open to new ideas in the bedroom. I know that we’ve only had sex once, but I couldn’t help but notice-” 

“That I like being choked?” She took his words right out of his mouth, putting a devious smile on her face as she said them. He nodded, a bashful smile on his face.

“I’m pretty open, yeah. I haven’t tried many things, but there’s a first time for everything. So, I’m up for experimenting and I’d want some of my first times to be with you,” she straightforwardly said. He loved how honest and open she was, and it was just a quality that was going to be added to the long list of why he adored her. 

“I feel the same way.” He smiled. 

“Can I just say, though…I loved it when you talked to me the way you did. It’s really sexy and it makes me feel sexy.” 

Harry smirked. “Noted.” 

For the rest of the night, they talked about things they’d want to try on each other. They had a growing list of ‘yes’ and ‘no’ on things to try in the bedroom, which ranged from being handcuffed, blindfolded, over-stimulating, and mutual masturbation. Luci was open to spitting and slapping if Harry was down to try it, and he told her that was up for trying anything with her, but he answered that he’d love to test out the waters on those two to see if they both liked it. 

It was only going to grow from when they experiment and talk about it again. Their conversation had sparked up a sense of arousal in both of them that they were fretting in their seat and couldn’t keep still. Luci noticed him grow hard in his trousers, so she straddled his lap, and asked him to take her to bed, which he wasn’t going to say no to. 

He watched as she rode him to oblivion, throwing her head back as her tits glistened with sweat despite the cold weather on the first of February. Harry then ate her out, burying his tongue in between her folds. At first, he denied her orgasm, telling her that he’d allow her to let go once he gave her permission to because he wasn’t quite finished with licking her up. Luci was whiny as she cried out into the room, gripping his curls the hardest her strength would allow her. And when he gave her permission, she came on his tongue, his face, and his chest, wetting the sheets below her; and Harry swore it was the filthiest but hottest thing he’d ever seen. Their breaths were heavy, making the room even warmer than it already was with all the tension and passion that swirled through the air. 

After they regained their energy back, they went a few more rounds until they were absolutely exhausted. And they both knew they were going to be incredibly sore the next morning, maybe even the next few days; but they say that the best kind of sore is when you’re finished with a workout, so Harry and Luci both categorized their rounds as the best cardio. 

April 27, 2018 

Cheers and claps were spread all around as the director called out the final cut to the final scene of the film. It had been a long and tiring process, but a wave of proudness and relief was felt throughout the entire studio. 

Luci felt relieved she was finished with this project while still feeling a bittersweet rush of emotions. This was her first ever major film that she was a part of, and she felt nothing short of proud of herself at how hard she worked to get to where she was. But the journey wasn’t over yet as she couldn’t wait to start her next one, and where that adventure would take her. 

Harry was all she could think about. She couldn’t wait to finally go home to him for a while and not have to worry about anything. They only saw each other for one and a half days at the beginning of March when she was filming in New York before she had to fly back to California, but one and a half days were better than nothing.  

She hugged the crew and cast as a big smile stayed on her face for the remainder of the time she was on set. Everyone took pictures with one another after the cast had changed out of their wardrobe and costumes while the production crew was cleaning everything up. 

Thea and Samantha arrived on set once filming was over to congratulate Luci. They hugged and took a few pictures, which was now going to be a tradition after Luci was done with a project. After everyone had settled down, the adrenaline ceased a bit, Luci headed back to her trailer with Thea. Before she could enter, Thea pulled her to the side to introduce Luci to a journalist who was waiting for them by the side of her trailer. 

“Hi, Luciana. My name is Audrey.” They shook hands as Luci politely introduced herself and greeted the interviewer. 

“Audrey is just going to interview you, is that okay?” Thea asked, and Luci nodded, seeing as it was for harmless promo. She was a bit nervous because this interview was probably for an important media outlet, and it was her very first one too. 

Throughout the months, Luci had gone through media training since Thea mentioned that it was necessary and inevitable since she was now in the spotlight, so public appearances and special interviews were required for her to go through that training. Her media coach told her the basics: to be herself—people love to see true and raw personality to a celebrity; have interesting stories to tell upon asking because people will ask, and be passionate because the media loves to pick up on nitty gritty details about one’s appearance and attitude, which will cause them to flip the switch completely. 

The entire process had overwhelmed her a bit as later that night, she called Harry in tears as she explained the training to him as he tried to comfort her through the phone from across the country. 

He assured her that everyone was going to love her because she had a loveable and approachable persona to her that it would be difficult to not love her; Harry had almost slipped his three words that were lingering on his tongue to further prove his point, but he stopped himself, not wanting to say them over the phone. 

Thea let herself into the trailer, leaving the two to begin the interview. 

“Okay, do you mind if I record you?” Audrey asked, looking down at her phone, making Luci trail her eyes down to the voice memos app where Audrey’s thumb hovered over the record button. 

“No.” She shook her head, and Audrey pressed the red button. 

“So, Luciana, I was informed this was your very first major film project. How do you feel about it?” Audrey questioned in a professional interviewer voice. 

“I-I feel very honored to be working in this film with so many people that I’ve watched on the screen growing up. This film has such an amazing crew and cast that it felt like family; and I learned so many things from this entire journey, so I’m very appreciative and grateful to be part of this.” She may have rambled a bit, but it was a solid and genuine answer. 

“Who are your inspirations that you look up to while being part of this business?” 

Luci thought for a moment, gathering the actors and actresses that popped in her head. “To name a few: Meryl Streep, Sandra Bullock—I had the honor of working with here—and Cillian Murphy, to name a few. I’ve also really loved and was always inspired by Giulia Stone. I loved all of the movies she did in the seventies, and she’s just so iconic and a legend that I will always admire.”

Audrey then asked about her upbringing—where the new and potential star grew up, and her past job on Broadway. 

“Broadway was also a dream of mine when growing up, and the atmosphere was insane. I loved every minute of it, and I left the building with so much adrenaline and energy every night because the audience was always so wonderful.” 

They then talked about her role for Miss Saigon, and Luci was reminiscent of her part before she stepped into the world that was filled with well-known actors and a big industry. In a way, she missed the Broadway universe, and for the first month of shooting for the film, she considered quitting and going back to Broadway as she felt like she wasn’t fit enough to be part of the job, but she pushed herself through (with the help of Harry and her family). She believed everything happened for a reason, and perhaps her time on Broadway was limited to what she’d expected because the film industry was calling her name. 

“Last question to wrap it up.” Audrey chuckled. “Do you have a lover? Anyone special out there that has your heart? These questions will be asked frequently, so might as well get used to them now.” The curiosity poured through the interviewer’s body, and portrayed in her exterior as her eyes bulged, lips curled in as her hand moved her phone closer to Luci, making sure to get her answer on record crystal clear with no chance to mumble or hide her answer. Luci didn’t like how she said the last sentence, like it was an obvious question to ask. 

For some prideful and egotistical reason, Luci didn’t want to fill her satisfaction, to fill the media’s curiosity in hopes to feed people the latest gossip and the inaccurate news. Sure, Luci wasn’t a big name, people barely looked twice at the mention of her name, but something inside of her didn’t want everyone to know what her personal or love life looked like; frankly because it wasn’t any of their business. 

Confidently, she subtly leaned her head a little closer to the speaker of Audrey’s phone before answering, “No, I don’t.” 

Audrey pressed the red button again to stop recording, and Luci would later on know that she made a big mistake saying that.

come talk to me about your feelings, thoughts, favorite moments and scenes! thank you for reading <3 next chapter will be up next saturday!

What about a cis woman who has androgynous features and hates it and herself for it? I'd give anything for a more feminine face and not look so flat chested. Is this dysphoria too? Do you have any resources for this sort of problem? It seems silly, but when I see trans women having things like facial feminization surgery or going on hormones and getting breasts that are nice, I wonder if a cis woman who experiences the same pain over her androgynous features is in the same boat..

Aww, anon. I’m so sorry to hear that you’re struggling this way. I wouldn’t say this is gender dysphoria as gender dysphoria is involves a persistent sense of unease and conflict between a person’s physical or assigned gender and the gender with which he/she/they identify.  You are a cis woman who identifies as a woman, but wishes she looked more feminine, which is very different.

I would assess how strong your feelings are and if it’s extremely severe, to the point that your distress causes you to be highly preoccupied with it and it is impacting your school, work, home, etc or and you find yourself hiding away, I would consult a therapist. You may have body dysmorphic disorder.If it’s not quite THAT extreme, the I would say that what you’re feeling and struggling with is still totally valid and far, far more common amongst folks than you might think.  Whether you realise it or not, as a woman you are bombarded all the time with powerful systemic, societal pressures to look, dress, and behave in a certain manner every day - and all of that can really destroy how people feel about themselves.

Shoving the rest of this under a cut for length.

Let me just tell you right now - my breasts are fuckin’ tiny.  I know I literally just asked for advice on binders a few days ago, but I’m an A cup at best. Probably smaller.  The slight, itty-bitty ‘cup’ shape on my flimsy bralettes probably give these non-existent knockers more shape than they really have.  Even though I’m buying binders and what not, on a lazy day, I could honestly just slap some pasties on these nip-nops and call it good. They’re that small.

This is amazing and awesome now that I’m busily trying to minimize their existence as much as possible.  I consider myself genderqueer/genderfluid so some days I’ll be crushed over the fact that I can’t be this tall, jacked, majestic Tiergan-shaped dude, while other days I’ll be fine and dandy with looking like a woman, while MOST days I just want to be the purest manifestation of Gender Confusion Inducement™ in other people.  Me wanting binders over my itty-bitty nublet tiddies is just me wanting to go that extra mile to be flat as a fuckin’ wall.

But when I thought I was a cis woman? I felt crushingly ashamed by them.  

Back then, I didn’t really like myself or how I looked. I didn’t like looking at myself in the mirror. I HATED looking at myself in pictures. I rarely took selfies, because I thought I was not very attractive.  I thought I was bland and ugly looking.  Society had told me again and again that attractive women looked a certain way, were shaped a certain way, dressed a certain way, etc, and that clearly my unhappiness was based upon the fact that I did not conform to that mold.I thought to be happy and to feel better about myself, I had to double down on the womanliness and become more conventionally attractive. So I’d buy things like massive push-up bras that never felt good, comfortable, and I hated in a desperate attempt to conform. I’d buy these really specific types of shirts and clothes that I didn’t like at all, but thought was what was ‘pretty’ for women. I’d fumble through learning make-up, not because I was interested in the colors, the expression, the creativity, and accentuating my features the way I wanted, but because that’s just what adult women were supposed to do.  I’d buy certain shoes I didn’t really even like, but knew pretty women were supposed to like and wear.

I was trying so damn hard to fit the mold and in the end, it only made me feel worse.  I felt like I was wearing this awkward, uncomfortable shell. People would tell me I was pretty, but I didn’t feel happier. I just felt more miserable, because all this extra emotional and physical labour I was putting into myself just to fit this arbitrary bullshit notion of what an ideal pretty lady was supposed to be like was EXHAUSTING and I didn’t even really like how I looked. I didn’t want to do it all every. single. day of my life.

Realising I was nonbinary was absolutely liberating for me, because I thought  “Well… if I’m not a cis woman and none of the old ‘rules’ matter anymore, …what does handsomeness or beauty actually mean to me?” 

And for the first time in my entire adult life, I defined for myself what beauty and handsomeness truly meant for me.  It was wonderful and liberating.  The first thing I realised was that I didn’t really give a fuck about how big my boobs are. Society did. And BOY HOWDY it was GREAT not giving a flying fuck about that anymore.  I still keep a few bras around for costuming/cosplay purposes, but you could not catch me fucking dead in one otherwise.

I used to hate make-up and find it to be this long, cumbersome chore that I would lose interest in doing every day, but once I got to sit and experiment on how I personally actually wanted it to look on my face - I fucking loved it. I like experimenting with colors and want to play with more. It appeals to the artist in me to play on a canvas even if that canvas is my face.

Fashion as a whole became a wild new experience. I stopped thinking about what I felt pressured to buy because it would make me look a certain way and what I really, really wanted.  I made a pinterest board of fashion goals and pinned every single thing I could find that I liked - regardless of whether it was a man, woman, or theater major dressed up in costume wearing it so I could identify what I actually wanted.  I dyed my hair pink, but got it cut in a more masculine manner and I fucking love the way I look now.

You might be thinking “Yeah, ok, Tiergan, that’s great and all, but I’m not nonbinary.”

But the funny thing I realised was that even though embracing that I am nonbinary led me to this understanding that I could take back my own power and define for myself what attractiveness truly means for me - this was a thing I could have done at any point in my life if I hadn’t been so buried in all those signals from society on what beauty was supposed to be.

I’m not going to sit here and tell you “just accept ur natural self! Don’t change a thing! Body positivity!!!!!” Because: 1) I know when you’re in a place of feeling super down on yourself, that shit doesn’t help at all and just feels extremely inauthentic. 2) I changed A LOT about myself until I was happy with my appearance. I just didn’t change it in the ways that I previously thought I was ‘supposed’ to.

So instead what I’ll say is that if you’re willing and able, I would set aside an hour or two each week to clear your mind, dig deep, and try to visualize a universe in which nothing anyone else thinks about your appearance matters anymore, because YOU are God.  You have a blank slate.  

There is no pressure to look a certain way to be considered beautiful, because you’re God. You decide what is beautiful..  No one in this universe gives a fuck if you have big tiddies, little tiddes, medium tiddies or any kind of tiddy, because right now the universe is a blank slate and all tiddies are created equal in a blank slate.  No one in this universe cares whether or not you have the perfect heart-shaped feminine face or not, because you’ve not told anyone yet what is considered attractive.  You are the decider of beautiful things.

Now imagine that you, as God of this World, descend down to hang with the mortals.  You can’t really change your body without going back to your old weirdo universe back on Earth, but what you can change is your clothes, your hair, your make-up, etc.  Knowing that this universe is yours and you get to decide what beautiful is for yourself, what would you change?  

Remember, you’re God in this universe you’ve made - so you don’t have to impress fucking anybody.  Anyone who says shit to you gets smited or yeet into the sun.  As a god, you get to wear what makes you feel powerful, majestic, and appropriately godlike - what does that clothing look like?  Can you imagine it?  If it’s hard, maybe pull up pinterest and surf around for your god-clothes.  Would you get stylish sneakers or thigh high boots?  Would you get a lady’s power-suit or a lolita dress?  Would you get some neat unique godly jewelry? (If yes, I recommend Etsy. That site is gonna destroy my fuckin’ destory my wallet.)

What’s your make-up like?  Is it tough to imagine?  Pull up another pinterest. Use it to find your god-makeup.  And hey - are you putting this make-up on because it makes you feel GOOD and POWERFUL like the goddess you are, or to impress the mortals? Because again - you’re god. You don’t have to impress jack shit. This make up is for YOU and what makes you feel GOOD and POWERFUL and GODLIKE.

Do you still care about having bigger boobs? (Did you know a fuckload of actual supermodels and Hollywood actresses have small tiddies? So even in THIS universe, you don’t need big boobs to be beautiful!)  Do you still feel unhappy that your face is kind of androgynous according to the dumbasses back in the vastly inferior universe you originally came from?  Or do things in your universe where you’re god feel pretty great?  I hope so, because gods don’t really have time to worry about the funky assumptions of mere mortals. You’re too busy being fabulous and doing godlike shit.

Hope this sort of helps!

Why we love Kate, not Meghan

I’ve been seeing the “If you love her (Catherine) you don’t need to hate her (Meghan)” meme going around on IG. I had to clear things up for myself and anybody this resonates once and for all. Let me first start off by saying my feelings for Meghan Markle are not of hate. I find her and Catherine beautiful in their own respective ways. I only abhor Meghan’s behavior, actions, total disrespect for the Royal Family hierarchy, trying to curry favor with the public through her PR attempts, and blatant sense of entitlement.

We are only typing words online making it difficult to decipher a tone of voice. Since there is none to be heard or facial expressions detected, you can take it much more worse, dramatic, and catty than it really is. I try to write as clearly as I can to convey my meanings as fast I can churn it out for everyone to read. I do it so my opinions are not misunderstood to be of jealousy, hating, bullying, or racism. I feel I have to restate this as I’ve gained many new followers and likely new spies or just plain curious folks. It would be truly wonderful to meet everyone I interact with online, follower, spy, or passersby. That human interaction is missing from this very anti-social media platform.

So, let me say I am none of those four things above. In fact, I was quite enthusiastic initially with Meghan Markle’s debut into the royal scene. She of course is a far cry from the typical posh British blondes Harry dated. It was refreshing and new. She was a Californian, ethnic, and American just like me, who came from a disjointed family. She was a breath of fresh air as a new addition, but that quickly turned into mush when that engagement interview revealed her domineering, controlling, and insincere personality with the camera. I took her saying she didn’t know THAT MUCH about Price Harry, not that she didn’t know him or the royal family. This is often restated incorrectly. Her statement during the interview came off as if Prince Harry’s royal-ness wasn’t a big deal to her. That they’re equally on the same plane and their names hold the same weight as far as that statement went. That initial interview showed her ego on display and the Vanity Fair magazine she interviewed for as a tell all after it was revealed she was Harry’s girlfriend. Shortly before that, in November 2016, she had Harry write a foolish statement asking the public to leave her alone after she made a false report of someone breaking into her Toronto home. Then she goes on to do that Vanity Fair magazine. The hypocrisy. Harry could never turn back after that. It was more binding than a wedding if you ask me.

Even her ex-best friend Ninaka Priddy told DailyMail, “I know the Royal Family was something she found fascinating. She had one of Princess Diana’s books [Diana: Her True Story] on her bookshelf, and even when she was with Trevor she told me she wanted to go and stay in London for at least a month. I can’t remember exactly when this was, but she was married to Trevor and starring in Suits. She mentioned about wanting to go to London a couple of times. I wasn’t shocked or even surprised to hear about Prince Harry. I know she used to love The Princess Diaries — films about a commoner who becomes part of a Royal Family. She was very taken with that idea.”

Meghan would relish the thought of living a real life Princess Diaries scenario. Everyone in her family circle knew she was infatuated with the idea of being a modern day princess with power. She admired Princess She-Ra. In her defunct Tig blog she wrote, “I, for one, was all about She-Ra, Princess of Power. And grown women seem to retain this childhood fantasy. Just look at the pomp and circumstance surrounding the royal wedding and endless conversation about Princess Kate.”

That was a huge red flag to me. Her best friend knew her since she was 11 and they were inseparable like sisters, like family. So, I take her words seriously as to who Meghan really was. She stopped talking to her after three seasons of Suits. Fame got to her head. She left her then husband Trevor, who helped her get on the show. She was out for a more “empowering” position in life. She used who and what she could to get where she is today. She downplayed her knowledge and awareness of the royal family big time and it really came back to bite her.

Meghan had her sights set on expanding her name and fame somehow someway since Suits was wrapping up with her supporting role being axed soon. Unhappily, her marriage to Trevor Engelson ended abruptly by her (mailing her rings back my mail), after almost 10 years of supposed true happiness finding The One. According to her ex-best friend she knew since she was 11 years old. She left him for Corey Vitiello, a highly celebrated chef in Toronto after her career took off some with Suits. Corey was also cooking for Prince Harry when Meghan first met the royal. He runs a chicken restaurant chain called Flock. Roast chicken, anyone? Yes, Meghan has commented time and time again her specialty is roast chicken. She picked up this talent likely from living in common law marriage with Corey in Toronto. That’s also what she was cooking when Prince Harry proposed? Gosh, what a coincidence. The Sun said, “The pair split in May 2016 - with the Telegraph reporting that Meghan was still with Cory when she first met Harry. The prince was in Canada to promote the Invictus games in May 2016. The chef refused to comment on the rumours that the Prince was part of the reason their relationship ended.” Hmmm, also a suspicious coincidence.

I don’t knock her for watching out for herself and trying to put her name out there. It’s a dog-eat-dog world in the acting industry. She was only successful in Toronto with Suits. Hollywood was the ultimate goal and dream. Her father Thomas Markle was a successful Emmy winning lighting director for Married with Children. She basically grew up on set and likely salivated at the fame and attention she would get being one. As a narcissist, this would feed her ego majorly. She was never going to be more famous than an extra in those random comedies or low-budget made for TV movies. She was pushing nearly 40. That’s the career death age of actresses in North America, maybe everywhere. She wasn’t a Meryl Streep or Viola Davis. She had to think fast. She did. Man, did she hit the jackpot with Harry. Apparently, their relationship wasn’t even revealed to Harry’s family until 6 months into it. All that time, Thomas Markle kept his mouth shut about it. He was loyal to his favorite daughter and paid for her expensive upscale schooling her entire life, even some in college. She ghosted him for making a foolish mistake with the media when he didn’t recieve an invite to the wedding. This time period was key to her sinking her claws in to Prince Harry’s vulnerability, weaknesses, broken and damaged self. She does want to be another Diana, but all she is now is a mother-wife to Harry. As her ghosted former best friend said, she is very calculated.

Using others as a stepping stone or tool to get where you want is extremely cold-hearted, but that was her MO. There is a reason a trail of ghosted, dejected lovers, family and friends have come out of the woodwork since Harry said his family was the one she never had. HAH. Cry me a river. Samantha only came out when that was openly said. What a stupid, hurtful, foolish statement Harry. This was during the Christmas Service at Sandringham she attended when they were only engaged. That’s unheard of. Even Catherine Middleton, wife of the heir didn’t even get invited to any outings until they were officially married. I commend Prince William for his caution as he had much more to lose than Harry with his choice of a wife.

Prince William was extremely worried about the tabloids and press doing what they did to his beloved mother to Kate. They chased Kate around and staked out their cameras at her flat. They followed her to work. They shoved cameras in her face getting in and out of cars. She was very chill about it. Alarmed, but civil. It was chaos. She was a BIG DEAL. She was marrying the heir to the British monarchy. Prince William was a dreamboat. Many of us were very fascinated by who his choice was. When they married, there were years and years of ridicule with comments about her “Waity Katey” nickname. He made sure she has as much time living a normal private life before becoming a royal. She needed to withstand the public scrutiny as his on and off again girlfriend first. It wasn’t a matter of him getting coldfeet. He was protecting her. They were college friends first then fell in love over the course of 6 years or so. They had a solid foundation.

She even had a few incidents where her skirt flew up too high revealing too much as well as her chest. It’s all trivial superficial things, I know, but it matters as a royal. We do the same with Meghan. It’s the optics that need to be taken into consideration. I’m fine with critiquing dress style, as there’s a certain decorum needed in a royal family. She, Kate, needed to dress more prudently to avoid mishaps. There were several in her first few years. She has improved beautifully and has her style down to science. Kate had many of the criticisms Meghan shares as far as entering in the royal family goes being a commoner having to do with dress code and keeping her mannerisms appropriate at events. There are many comments on old articles saying how Kate was smiling way too much at this same event years ago. How her hair was too long. She needed to stop twirling it and have some respect for her role and the dignity of the event. It was the Remembrance Day Sunday event at Whitehall in 2013. The two years before that, she garnered the same scathing reactions from the public.

Kate has really come into her own despite the awful criticisms and judgement on her class. She has bore the years and years of cruel digs to her with great decorum and stride. She has NEVER COMPLAINED. She has come in to her own identity as a mother, wife, future queen consort, charity patron, and most importantly a genuine person with the public. I quote The Sun highlighting past labels calling her a "work-shy social climber, the lucky girl whose sole job in life was to sit around looking pretty until William proposed." That's all turned into something solid and magical.

She has an ease with others that makes them comfortable in her presence you don't expect from such a senior royal. She has bloomed. We love her for that and how she lets Prince William shine by supporting his role as heir through their duties and appearances together. She also shines equally if not more than Prince William. Her children are absolutely gorgeous and a delight. We have all come to adore her because she has earned it. Yes, with the public you have to earn our love.

With Meghan, it seemed as if they were marrying then having a baby at warp speed before Harry decided to change his mind without knowing her family and past. They weren’t allowing the public to let us see Meghan in a positive gradual light, but a social climbing one with all her past history written online for all to see; also through the testimony of friends, families, her attention-seeking Instagram posts, colleagues etc. She hadn’t proved herself worthy yet to the public like Kate. It was hitting the ground running to be her own brand and name through Harry’s family.

On a superficial level, Kate and Meghan are not fashionistas or supermodels. But they are always photographed with what brands they’re wearing for all to see. That’s the fun part of watching all royal women, their outfits and accessories. But with Meghan it goes PAST and BEYOND outfits and style. It’s an entire plethora of reasons. She’s a whole different “beast” as she likened her unfair treatment in that Africa interview. All that have nothing to do with her ethnicity. The criticisms we non-Markle fans share with her are as followed:

• ghosting those friends and family members she used to put a notch on her belt

• using Princess Diana’s name to beautify her tainted image

• using Harry and his weaknesses to crawl her way into the royal family

• portraying such an affected manner in which she speaks, interactions with others, and overall pretending to be royal instead of being herself

• wearing inappropriate revealing attire to events, not adhering to dress code

• being rude and demanding to royal staff and even film and restaurant workers before marrying Harry

• constantly stepping in front of Harry as if he was the non-royal at events, inserting herself in conversations and trying to be the center of attention, a know-it-all

• making herself out to be a self made millionaire when she was more like a thousand-aire after Suits owning no real estate, cars or possessions to note beside an expensive heel collection

• taking credit for things that she did not do entirely on her own but passing it off that she did

• upsetting Duchess of Cambridge who she should have allied with for assimilation

• planting her PR stories to try and break up the image and marriage that the Cambridges have naturally built

• constantly trying to one-up the Cambridges while they go about their duties, her seething envy is quite evident by trying to take the light away from their causes

• inconsistent stories of how she and Harry met, supposedly it's Misha Nonoo, but who knows

• implying she was pregnant, all but announcing it with that navy blue coat halfway open at Princess Eugenie's wedding

• overly flicking her coat open constantly and prancing around with her hand on her ever changing bump (whether real or not we will never know)

• embellishing her character by feeding us accolades of herself every chance she gets, especially on Sussex Royal

• rarely ever using the titles of more important senior royals, but overusing her HRH on herself

• having famous Hollywood friends constantly speak for her and how amazing she is, many whom she had NEVER met prior to marrying Harry, but invited to the wedding anyway; leaving out her own family members (especially her loving father who made a foolish mistake) on both sides who did nothing to warrant such cold-heartedness

• preaching about carbon footprints, only having two children, and saving the environment all the while jetting around in private jets around the world sparing no expense

• portraying this image of a humanitarian when she herself is seen constantly in astronomically priced bespoke, couture, and designer clothes and accessories that taxpayers find (well over a million now dollars as the 6th in line’s wide); paid or not by designers to advertise for them

According to The Star, “It’s a figure so staggering it’s worth revisiting. According to estimates — based on totalling up the approximated or stated retail values of everything she’s been seen wearing since November 2017 — the number is hovering around the $1.5 million mark. On her and Harry’s official visit to Ireland this spring, for instance, Markle wore over $52,000 worth of fashion in just two days.”

They also stated “The majority of Markle’s expenditure this year went toward her two wedding dresses: That Givenchy ceremony dress is thought to have cost around $330,000 and her Stella McCartney dress (or the capsule collection’s 46 replicas released after the wedding, at least) sold for $5,800. That’s a bargain compared to the $93,000 she spent on the Ralph & Russo frock she wore for some of her engagement shoot. Add in a $6,500 Oscar de la Renta dress to a wedding here, a $5,000 bespoke Carolina Herrera frock to a Trooping the Colour there, and well, you get to that million mark pretty quickly.”

• then there’s the vacant Forgmore Cottage that wasted taxpayers money if $3 million to renovate; apparently they don’t even live there as she’s in SoHo accommodations and he in his Nottingham Cottage

• playing media games with the facts and dates surrounding the birth of Archie and never allowing him to be photographed until it was on African soil for a docu-drama

• pleading for privacy over and over then showing up unannounced at events uninvited,

• filming a tone-deaf tactless documentary in Africa, revealing how she felt she's didn't have a fair shake in the royal family, the absolute nerve of she and Harry

• suing the press for racism and hate stories when she herself courts the press daily (she did pap walks in London right before it was announced she was Harry's girlfriend), when she has herself and Harry to thank for all the negative press as there's not one story pointing out criticism of her ethnic background

• lastly, there are the extreme fans called the “sugars” who go around defending MM every chance they get in a rageful manner like packs of rabid dogs if we comment on how we don’t like her style of dress or try to reason with a differing opinion to theirs on a certain news story

Have I missed anything? Likely so. I’m still new to this whole Markle debacle so excuse my errors and typos. The soap opera does go on and there are so many details and shady ways Meghan has portrayed herself past and present. From what I’ve seen, heard, and read from her own mouth and those who knew her well, “she’s a witch” as Candace Owens put it bluntly. I truly wanted to give the benefit of the doubt to her when she kept shooting herself in the foot.

She is NOT where Kate was when she married Prince William either. Kate was 29, unmarried and very close to her family with no previous marriages. Today, her family appear to be her rock solid support outside of Prince William. She assimilated well with the other royals who she now calls family. She listened to counsel, respected the centuries of tradition the monarchy had always followed. She won our hearts. Through and through, she can credit her great inner strength she possessed to overcome the constant ridicule to become the well loved future queen consort of Britain. That is no easy feat.

Meghan was 37 and many times divorced (one annulled with Joe Giuliano, an attorney she married after college), so maybe three if you count the common law marriage with Cory in Canada. Trevor was her first official one. So Harry may be her 4th! She had lived many lives before with connections to SoHo, being a yacht girl, then there are her ties to the wretches Jeffery Epstein, Hillary Clinton, Weinstein and their global agenda machine I would have to write a dissertation on to explain.

She appeared to have used her first official husband Trevor, a successful producer in his own right (she got a cameo in his film Remember Me with Robert Pattinson) to get her role on Suits as he’s done excellent for himself in the film industry as a producer. Meghan was somewhat popular in Toronto from the supporting role. She was being phased out soon after her relationship with Corey started as well. She needed a plan, along came Prince Harry one fine clucking night. Then, she set her sights on getting setup with him by Markus Anderson or Misha Nonoo; who knows with all these conflicting stories.

I said good for her at the start. At first it was incredible to see an ordinary girl from LA had married into such a high profile family, to a real titled Prince, no less! It was inspiring and fun to fantasize. Nevertheless, Meghan’s actions listed above, the various first-hand testimonies of people who were family and friends pre-Harry, her hellbent PR attempts to heighten her name, her lack of honesty, her contrived behavior pretending to be a coy ingenue, the scary desire to be Princess Diana by hunting Harry like a sport, and all the stories coming out about how she was searching for a famous British man to elevate her profile, and likely so much more to come, are why we are here with these accounts today.

Hate is such a blanket word overused nowadays in the media. But she has earned that word all on her own. We’re here to disprove and retort the stories churned out daily by her team Sunshine Sachs that continue to deceive the public. Everything is out there to see. Her character is out there to decipher online. You just have to stop reading the fluff and self-promotion and find her true nature pre-Harry to see her scheming social climbing insincere self-serving ways. So, please don’t make us out to be hating, racist, jealous, bullies because we don’t love her like we do Kate. Move past that because we’re tired of hearing it. There’s no other argument anymore for her sugars it seems. Excuse me for not buying Meghan’s pseudo feminism and humanitarian image. She is far from that of a humanitarian. Everything is written on the wall for her. She only has herself to thank for it.

(Disclaimer: if you wrote this and don’t want it up, send me an ask and I’ll take it down)

Snippets of Geordie James’ letters to Claire, May-August 1974

Letter 1:

As you've probably noticed, there aren't enough of us Stockwell fans around. Before my first letter about Dean and Guy was published in the January issue of RBH [Rona Barrett's Hollywood], I felt a bit paranoid in my affection for them. I knew they must have fans somewhere, although maybe few and far-between. Now that I'm corresponding with several other fans of theirs, I can't believe it! I really enjoy exchanging praises about Dean and Guy. They are two subjects I never tire of reading or writing about. I hope you feel the same.

I know that when you wrote your letter, you didn't know how much I adore Dean -- as you've probably guessed by now, I've done as much research as possible on him. The one thing I didn't know about Dean was that he's living with Russ Tamblyn. I had heard from this fellow who wrote a book about former child stars that Dean "lives in Topanga Canyon with a very beautiful roommate." Now Russ Tamblyn is attractive, but I must admit I had something else in mind!

************

Your letter is very interesting and intelligent. This has been the case with all the Dean fans who have written me. If it's true that certain artists attract certain types of fans, I'd say that Dean definitely attracts mature and intelligent people.

Dean fans are generally older than are the fans of others, which prompts me to ask your age, if you don't mind telling me?

About myself -- I'm 27, a Pisces like Dean. In fact, his birthday is the day before mine.

*********

The most up-to-date information I've heard about Dean is that he was in Albuquerque in March of this year, on stage in a comedy called "Relatively Speaking." In an interview from the Albuquerque newspaper, Dean said that he would "prefer to exclude neurotics" in his roles in the future. He complained of being typecast, probably as a result of "Compulsion," his success at playing a poetic, deranged genius, his common character up til now. He said that he would like to do comedy and work with Mel Brooks. Reviews from the play raved that Dean was brilliant in comedy.

How does this news impress you? I ask because I'm wondering if you share my views, which are in complete sympathy with Dean. From that old "Bonanza" segment Dean did, I knew he had comedic sense that was very appealing. If you'll recall, that show opened with Dean playing a drunk, begging for whiskey in the saloon. When taken out of context from the story, that swaying, groping drunkeness showed a great scope for comedy. He is fantastic, able to play it up or down. It is Dean's subtleness, somehow, that makes him so great -- he could never be described as a ham, don't you agree? His acting style is convincing and he makes it look so easy! Just a look, the tiniest gesture, and he says everything. Dean definitely has a charisma, some sort of magic that only a few actors have shared. I often compare Montgomery Clift to Dean, which must be very terrible to do, but I consider Monty to have been the similar type of acting genius Dean is. I'd call it "realism," I guess. When an actor is charged with so much emotion in his work and is able to convey it without over-acting, that's something to praise.

**********

I'm sure I know that look you describe on Dean's face, that disgusted look. When reading this part of your letter, I could see him doing it, so you must have described it well. When I watch the adult Dean acting, I always wait for that subtle, quick scratch. Do you know what I mean? Usually it's his eyebrow that itches him, sometimes his nose. Somehow when I see his scratch, I know everything is all right. I realize I sound a bit like a nut here, but I'm so fond of Dean that I love his little quirks. I think if I ever saw him act when he didn't scratch something, I'd probably think something was wrong. Perhaps I'd better change the subject before I sound like a genuine nut!

*****************

Have you by any chance ever heard from Dean? I ask because no one who's written me has. Personally, I have written Dean half a dozen times at various addresses without any luck. For some time now I have been trying to get in touch with him and ask his permission about starting a fan club for him. All we Dean fans have agreed that we need some means by which we can keep abreast of his career, but the main snag is finding Dean. I'm continuing to try. Right now I have several lines out – if only I can get a bite.

Letter 2:

I agree with you completely in regard to Dean's scope for other characters beyond the neurotic ones. I've read several places about actors and actresses who really suffer prolonged, damaging traumas related to typecasting in neurotic and mercenary roles. Mercedes McCambridge blamed her alcoholism on just such typecasting, as one example. I heard from someone that Bette Davis said that celluloid villains were always the nicest people in Hollywood and now that I consider it, it seems to be so. I think Dean is very together, but all the same it must be very frustrating to see that producers invariably think of him as "the perfect nut" for the part. It is frustrating for any creative person to be confined to one outlet of expression.

"The Happy Years" is one Dean movie I haven't seen, but I'd really love to, especially now after you've described the scene in the classroom. I agree about his flair for comedy, though, in what I have seen of him. What bothers me most about Dean's dissatisfaction is that he just might give up acting, if only temporarily, if producers continue to see him as the perfect nut. This is a secret opinion, never before revealed to another soul, Claire, but have you noticed Dean's lack of enthusiasm for his most recent roles? In particular, that "Police Surgeon" segment, you'll recall, wherein Dean played a prosecuting attorney who was kidnapped in exchange for the mobster he was trying to convict. Dean's fire just wasn't burning very much in that part, unless it was my imagination. Was it? I thought it very refreshing that he played a Good Guy for a change, but something seemed wrong somehow. I don't know if you get "Orson Welles Great Mysteries" there, since we get it here through Canada and it is a British-made series, but Dean was fantastic in that. He had another Good Guy part, as an innocent fellow accused of murdering his girlfriend's husband. What, by the way, do you think of Dean's "ponytail?" I think that I'd love to see his hair let down long -- I'm very curious how he'd look if he "let his hair down." I like long hair on men, anyway, so long as it's not ridiculously long, but in a broader sense Dean's endears me to him more because of its obvious symbolism. Dean is unique, an odd mixture of flashiness and seclusion, a mystery. Someone called him a "male Greta Garbo" and in a way it befits him. I see him as very real, don't you? As a person one could talk to, though I'd probably be terrified to speak to him, I must admit. However, I'd love the chance to be terrified.

"Compulsion," which you mention for its fainting and rape scenes, is one of my favorite Dean films, although I feel like a traitor for saying that, since this movie was the most responsible for his typecasting, it seems. So much was left out of "Compulsion," probably because of the time it was made, but the homosexual relationship, the sado-masochism between Artie and Judd, the helplessness under Judd's superior attitudes. . . so much was trimmed and altered or left out entirely from the book, but Dean put back every word with his eyes, with his gestures, with those melting looks, the never-quite-smiles. For that reason "Compulsion" is one of my favorite films, because never did Dean say so much by saying nothing.

I think my favorite movie from Dean's childhood is "Home Sweet Homicide," so far, but I haven't had the opportunity to see them all. Dean was precious in HSH, don't you think?

Did I tell you last letter about reading how Dean worked as a field laborer in Mexico when he quit acting in his middle teens? I meant to if I didn't. Had you ever read about that?

Letter 3:

Protocol would have me first apologize for the small delay in replying this time and secondly thank you kindly for the adorable pix you copied of Dean for me -- but I know you will forgive me for being rude this time, since I have some fantastic news that just came today. First, I heard from Dean!!! Second, he wrote personally! And thirdly but not leastly, he actually authorized ME to start a FAN CLUB for HIM. Can you believe it? I am so excited that I have scarcely touched the ground all day, as you can imagine. I am absolutely thrilled! He wrote that he has never even felt inclined to endorse a fan club before this, "in all my years," as he phrased it, but recently he has had a change of heart and feels he should "involve" himself in the "give and take" between himself "and those who admire and enjoy my work." He writes a very intelligent letter, needless to say -- and he has told me to go ahead and conduct the club any way I choose and that he will cooperate as much as possible. I repeat, can you believe it? He said I should notify him of receiving this letter and he will write more and contribute information, which of course I did immediately.

***********

As for the fan club we'll be putting together, we will have to start out on a small scale and build through publicity. Of course, you and the other Dean fans who write to me are automatically members, which goes without saying, but we really do need the publicity to reach the masses of Stockwell fans. Have you any suggestions? Any help you can offer would be very much appreciated. I plan to order some printed ads to send here and there and of course I will try Rona -- I have the National Fan Club organization address somewhere -- they print ads, too. Right now I'm so excited that I feel like going door-to-door!

***************

No, I didn't get the Albuquerque interview from Richard. I received it from a very nice woman by the name of Olive White who lives in Albuquerque. She just happened upon my letter in Rona's mag and sent me the available material from the newspaper. We now correspond – she's very nice. Yes, I thought too that it sounded just like Dean to say "a bit of fluff." He has a really unique way of writing and speaking as himself, in my opinion, because he sounds very intelligent and yet very -- "free." If you know what I mean. That's a combination one doesn't find every day.

************

Dean mentioned in his letter that he has just returned from eight weeks location filming in the Phillipine Islands, but he didn't go into detail about it. I asked, of course, and I'll pass that information along to you as soon as he responds again.

I agree with you about that "Police Surgeon" episode Dean guested on. Like you, I feel he just didn't try to get into the part. I'm not sure I understand why an actor would accept a part that he wouldn't really give his best to, expecially when the actor is as gifted as Dean. (Only Dean is as gifted as Dean, come to think of it.) Perhaps it was a question of timing or maybe he was sick or something like that. I know

Dean is a veteran, though, and a trooper, and I'm convinced he could sing and dance with a 104 degree temperature if he wanted to -- I guess, in conclusion, the only thing that makes sense is that Dean didn't want to do the show and yet for some reason or another was obligated to. Perhaps he and the director were at each other's throats two minutes after they were introduced. Any speculations from you? I think I've run out of possibilities.

****************

On the question of Dean's ponytail, all I know is that he apparently had it still in March, during his Albuquerque run. The profile long-shot I received shows it clearly, but the photo was definitely inferior for copying material. I would assume he still wears it, probably lets his hair down at home. I think it's very becoming, don't you?

*****************

About your questions on Dean's marriage [to Millie Perkins], I have no facts, only gossip I've been collecting. I don't know how they met but the implication seems to be that it was through Fox, where both were under contract. They supposedly secretly married on a hiatus together and didn't reveal it til they had to -- they opened a bowling alley together -- how's that for a weird fact? Millie retired from her acting career and refused to fulfill her contract to Fox, which caused her several hassles. The general gossip is that Dean said one actor in the family was enough, what with the nomad's life actors lead and all the separations they might face, so Millie gladly retired, wanting only to be his wife. She followed him everywhere and they faithfully shunned photographers and refused to grant interviews. Naturally, Dean was blamed for making Millie "aloof" since he always had that "aloof" reputation. She married him in her heyday, career-wise, I would assume. In any case, I have a small clipping about Millie's reaction to the divorce which heavily insinuates Dean divorced her, and that she was heartbroken about it for awhile. She pulled herself together, one reporter observed, and was determined to "make a comeback" in films. A footnote to this, though, was that she was blackballed for her behavior during her marriage to Dean.

Letter 4:

As far as Dean's side of the club goes, he's still in there supporting and contributing his best. He said that he has no intention of withdrawing his support (I had feared that he might, since it took him so many years to agree to a fan club). He's sent me quite a bit of information, but more on that in a moment.

***********

The fact of the matter is, Dean has established personal communication with me and I am the only one he has entrusted with his home address and telephone number. In a way I am naturally very honored and in another way, I feel very MEAN indeed having this privilege when you and others love Dean as much as I do. But I'm sure you understand that I can't break Dean's trust because he has really given of himself a great deal to go this far. He told me that he intends to get a post office box number in his home (the city in which he lives, I mean -- Topanga) for the fan club members to use, if they'd care to write.

***************

Dean sent me a monstrous, fat collection of papers -- his biography, a copy of which should be sent to each member. It's several pages long and would cost a fortune for me to copy, just for a few members. Now I'm holding off having it copied myself, as I'd like to know if you could have it copied free of charge?

***************

I have constructed a newsletter about Dean's doings which I am getting copied immediately to be sent to the members of the club.

************

I have spoken to Dean twice and he is really wonderful, Claire! He is very kind and very natural. Naturally he is very intelligent and has an amazing kaleidoscope of interests. What impressed me singularly about Dean from the phone conversations is that he is very real, very easy. He gives one a very calm, happy feeling about things. My biggest thrill happened when Dean went off in a verbal fantasy, when talking about his hottest new interest, a martial arts form called arnis. He started to act, heatedly talking about this martial art. A performance for me alone. I smiled for days afterward!

*****************

I agree with you, I would like the club to be unique and mature, a true reflection of Dean's greatness. I certainly would not want the club to be teenybopperish, as you say, or in any way an embarrassment to Dean.

The star of the upcoming film “Widows” needed to know what kind of wig or extensions she should wear to play Veronica Rawlins, the leader of an unlikely band of robbers scrambling to pull off a dangerous heist. Director Steve McQueen’s answer shocked the Emmy-, Tony- and Oscar-winning actress.

“I said, ‘Your own hair is beautiful — just wear it that way,’” recalls McQueen. “Veronica is a wash-and-go kind of girl.”

For Davis, the decision to appear on-screen in close-cropped, curly hair was liberating and represented an important social statement.

“You’re always taught as a person of color to not like your hair,” she says. “The kinkier it is, the so-called nappier it is, the uglier it is.”

McQueen stressed that he was interested in reflecting reality. More women looked like her, he told the actress, than like the artificial and idealized images of female beauty that Hollywood frequently projects.

“We’re into a zeitgeist where people are fighting for their space to be seen,” says Davis. “People have to know that there are different types of women of color. We’re not all Foxy Brown. We’re not all brown or light-skinned beauties with a big Afro. We have the girl next door. We have the older, dark-skinned, natural-haired woman.”

If “Widows” succeeds, it can help ensure funding for several Davis-led passion projects, ranging from a biopic about Texas congresswoman Barbara Jordan to a drama about an all-female military unit from the Kingdom of Dahomey. It will mean that an actress known for her volcanic intensity and commanding presence will finally get the roles she deserves. For too long, Tennon notes, his wife has had to make do with supporting turns, often playing maids or mothers, while ceding the limelight to white actresses. Davis may have scored raves and award nominations for “Doubt” and “Solaris,” but often she had only a few minutes of screen time to create a fully fleshed-out performance.

“She specialized in taking a piece of chicken and turning it into filet mignon,” says Tennon.

John Patrick Shanley, the writer and director of “Doubt,” the 2008 film that put Davis on the map after years of character work, knows firsthand about the paucity of roles available to African-Americans. He says every black actress of a certain age was up for Davis’ role because, though the part lasted only eight minutes, the aria of maternal love that the character was asked to deliver presented an important opportunity.

“This kind of role isn’t usually out there for a woman of color,” says Davis. “Widows” is a female-driven enterprise, offering up meaty roles for Michelle Rodriguez, Cynthia Erivo and Elizabeth Debicki, who play the other members of a gang of widows who must pull off a heist in order to pay their husbands’ debts to a drug dealer.

Women of color don’t get paid less than just male actors — their salaries pale in comparison with those of white women.

“There are no percentages to show the difference,” says Davis. “It’s vast. Hispanic women, Asian women, black women, we don’t get paid what Caucasian women get paid. We just don’t. … We have the talent. It’s the opportunity that we’re lacking.”

The movie business is outwardly liberal, but the mostly white men who run the major studios tend to cling to certain prejudices when greenlighting projects. In particular, there is a belief that films with people of color in the leads don’t do as well internationally.

That logic is being challenged. The blockbuster success of movies with women of color, such as “Crazy Rich Asians,” “Girls Trip” and “Breaking In,” may be softening old stigmas. Yet a recent survey by the USC Annenberg School for Communication and Journalism shows that the number of speaking roles for women has been virtually unchanged over the past decade. It gets worse when it comes to women of color. In 2017, 43 of the top 100 films lacked any black female characters, 65 were absent Asian or Asian-American female characters and 64 did not depict a single Latina character.

Davis doesn’t think change is possible unless executive suites across Los Angeles become more inclusive. “We’re not even invited to the table,” she says. “I go to a lot of women’s events here in Hollywood, and they’re filled with female CEOs, producers and executives, but I’m one of maybe five or six people of color in the room.”

“Widows” is a heist film anchored in grief. Unlike in “Ocean’s 11” or “The Thomas Crown Affair,” where the criminality is portrayed as a lark, Davis and her accomplices break the law because they have no choice and because they have troubled home lives.

“I have issues with stories of people who just get out of bed and start robbing banks,” she says. “As an actor, I needed to know what would drive a seemingly together woman to do this, and it always starts with someone reaching bottom.”

The film is as interested in painting a sprawling portrait of urban corruption as it is in laying the groundwork for the final caper. It touches on police shootings, political back-scratching, domestic violence and economic despair.

Davis says that wrestling with demons on-screen can be “torturous,” and she’s built a career by being able to radiate a kind of operatic fury and anguish. In “Fences,” for instance, her character Rose doubles over into a snot-dripping, tear-streaming state of indignation and regret after learning that her husband has cheated on her. And while her character in “Widows” is more tightly controlled, she has moments where her eyes reveal the deadness of a crippling depression. Yet those who work with Davis say she’s able to access this well of emotion without relying on a kind of Method acting intensity.

For Davis, film provided an important escape hatch at a key moment as she was growing up. At the age of 11 or 12, she remembers sitting around her family’s dilapidated television, which rested on top of another broken set and had an antenna caked in aluminum foil to get a stronger signal. She was watching “The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman.” Witnessing Cicely Tyson, an acclaimed black actress playing a defining role, age from 23 to 110 had an electrifying effect on the young woman from Central Falls.

“This beautiful, magical transformation happened in the midst of all that poverty,” recalls Davis. “It elevated me out of my situation and stimulated my imagination. I knew I needed to make a life doing this.”

  A very condensed version of Viola’s interview with Variety. Try to check the full one if can.

The night we met.

BRAD

I hated being home. I hated that this cold and empty Hollywood Hills house was now my 'home'. I spent most of my free days riding my motorbike, letting the roar of the engine drown out my thoughts. I missed my family. I even missed Angie. Though, if I were being honest with myself, not nearly as much as I thought I would.

I rode all across Los Angeles. I rode out to the desert. Joshua Tree. Death Valley. I didn't have any work to keep me busy. Not for a few weeks at least. Most of my friends were off working. George was busy with Amal. Cate, David, Ed... everyone was busy. They knew about the breakup, though the public didn't yet. They'd offered me their sympathy. I needed something more than that. I needed a distraction. I needed to get laid.

My phone vibrated in my pocket. I slowed down to a stop and took a look. My manager, Cynthia, wanted to know if I was going to the event tonight. I'd forgotten. Julia had invited me a few weeks ago to the opening party of this new restaurant and bar that she and her husband had invested in. I'd told her I'd go. I was sure I'd be fine by then. I hadn't been out much since Angie had kicked me out of the house we'd shared. Maybe this was just the time. Maybe I'd meet someone who would scratch that itch. Or maybe I'd feel worse than I already did. It didn't seem likely.

I texted her back that I'd be there. I rode home to get ready. I looked at myself in the mirror. This was 53, I thought. My hair had started to grey. I had wrinkles all around my eyes. At least I'd kept fit. Robert Redford was what? 80 now? He looked alright. Should I shave? I touched my chin. I'd let a short beard grow. My hair was short, a little messy. It'd do. I showered, changed into a pair of grey trousers and a grey button down. I put on some black dress shoes and organised a car to take me.

HAVEN

"I don't wanna go!" I whined. I'd already agreed. I'd already drank the required amount of pre-drinking alcohol that Cali had laid out for me. I was tipsy.  But it wasn't the good kind. It was the kind that reminded me how sad I was that my boyfriend of the last six months had dumped me for gaining a few extra pounds. Even if it was for work. I'd always been a little too curvy for the industry as a model. But a few more pounds, my agent assured me, would put me on top of the plus size modelling industry. If it meant I got to eat dessert now and then, I was all for it. Leo, however, was not. In his words, "I can't be seen dating a fat chick."

"We're going," Cali said, pulling me up off the lounge. "You look so good. It's gonna be so much fun. You can meet someone to take your mind off Leo."

"I don't want to meet anybody," I argued. "I want to stay home and watch Netflix."

"And waste this good buzz?" she asked. "My agent got me two tickets to this thing. It's too late to find someone else. I am not going alone. Get your ass up!" Cali was a budding actress. She had talent and she worked hard but she needed the luck meets opportunity part of the equation. She was a friend from back home and we just so happened to be moving to LA at the same time a year or so ago. Rooming together seemed the reasonable thing to do. She quickly became the best friend I'd ever had.

I groaned. She was right. I was being selfish. I needed to snap out of it. Leo didn't deserve my sadness. He was an asshole. I knew I shouldn't date a guy whose last hundred girlfriends were skinny blondes. But he'd asked. I was beyond flattered. Romeo and Juliet was my favourite movie as a young girl. How could I say no? Well I regretted it now, didn't I?

"Okay," I said, rising, shaking off the melancholy and making sure I hadn't messed my black beaded mini dress with spillage or creasing. I was good. "Let's go."

"Are you sure?" Cali asked, as annoyed as she'd be if I bailed, she didn't want to be a bad friend and force me out when I wasn't ready.

I didn't want to be a bad friend either and bail at the last minute. She needed to network. I needed to leave the house. I nodded. "Let's go."

BRAD

Jesus Christ. Who the hell is that? She's young, I thought. But sexy as hell. My cock throbbed within seconds of looking at those eyes. I couldn't see what colour they were. She was too far away. But they were piercing. She caught me looking. I looked away. 

Not smart. Really not fucking smart. You came to this party to find someone to fuck and she was not the one, I thought. She can't have been more than 22. I was almost double her age. But that body. In Hollywood, a girl with some flesh on her bones was harder to find than a cocaine-free surface. Who was she, I wondered. An actress? A model? She had to be something like that. She was too pretty to be a nobody.

HAVEN

Brad Pitt. Brad fucking Pitt. He was looking right at me. Why the hell was he looking at me? We were in a room filled with Los Angeles' most beautiful women and Brad fucking Pitt was looking at me. And, looking embarrassed to have been caught in the act. And yet, he looked at me again.

"Cali?" I asked. She was chatting with another actress from her agency. "Cali!" I pressed.

She turned to me, annoyed. "What?" she hissed.

"Is he looking at me?"

Cali looked around, confused. I watched the confusion turn to shock as her eyes widened and mouth dropped. "Is that Brad Pitt?"

"Yes, is he looking?" I asked.

"He was," she answered. "He just looked again," she said excitedly.

I turned back and he was still looking. He smiled a little. I smiled back. I turned back to Cali. "Oh my god."

"You have all the fucking luck! Go over there," she said.

"Are you insane? I can't just go approach Brad Pitt."

"Why the hell not?" she asked. "I'll do it."

She was always much braver than me. That must've been the actress in her. She could do anything if she was pretending to be someone else. "No," I said, shaking my head. I glanced back at him. He was chatting to Julie Roberts. Pffft. No way could I go over there.

BRAD

I could barely followed along with what Julia was saying. Something about drama with the head chef. I just nodded, looking intermittently over at the beautiful girl. She looked intermittently at me too. No way could I approach a girl that age. That would be way too creepy. Julia excused herself as Rhys, an old acting buddy of mine, came to say hello.  "How are you?" he asked as he shook my hand.

"Good, how are you?" I asked.

"Yeah, good," he answered. "What have you been up to?"

I rattled on about nothing particular. He'd heard about the projects I had coming up. He told me about his. I asked after his kids and he asked after mine. And, Angie. I reluctantly told him that we were over. "Sorry man. That sucks."

I nodded. I looked back over to the girl. He followed my gaze. Shit.

"You looking at Haven Roser?" he asked.

"Who?" I asked.

"Haven Roser," he answered. "The model? Long dark hair. Massive tits." They weren't massive. They were proportional to her body. Angie was straight as a board. I'd loved her body but I missed curves.

"Never heard of her," I answered, hoping he wouldn't go on.

"She's dating Leo," he said. "Ah. There he is."

I looked over to see Leonardo DiCaprio in his usual newsboy cap, approaching her where she sat with a few other girls. He never did have a problem dating the young ones. Damn.

"Not his usual type but I'd fuck her," Rhys went on. Sure. As if she'd let him near her. He was as greasy as they came. I struggled to remember why we'd been friends as he went on about his latest conquests. I looked around the room for other women. I still had an itch that needed scratching. But I couldn't tear my eyes away from her. Haven. 

HAVEN

What the fuck? Why is he here? I swallowed as he walked right over to me.  "Haven," he said, a question on his lips.

"Leo," I said back.

"What are you doing here?" I could barely hear him. I stood up. "What are you doing here?" he repeated.

"I'm having a drink..." I answered, showing him my half empty glass.

He smiled straight and unhappy. "This isn't really your scene."

I furrowed my brows. "What does that mean?"

"It's an industry party," he continued.

"It's a restaurant opening," I argued. Cali and her friend were looking up at us then. I looked over to Brad, he was watching as well.

"Come here for a sec?" he asked, pulling at my arm, leading us into the corridor leading to the exit.

I pulled my arm from his grip. He'd never handled me like that before. In the six months we'd spent together he could be a little inattentive but he'd never manhandled me. Any part of him that was ever sweet to me seemed to have vanished from his personality. "What?" I asked.

"These are my people. You should go."

I laughed a little. Was he serious? "I was here first," I argued. "You should go."

He scoffed. I saw Brad approaching from behind Leo. He clapped a hand on his shoulder. God, he was even better looking up close. I lost my breath a little. Leo was nothing compared to Brad. Not now, not ever. "Leo," he said in greeting.

"Brad," Leo said, the charm switched on. This was the guy that asked me out. Oozing charm. "How are you?"

"Good," he said, before turning to me. "Hi."

"I hoped I'd see you here. Quentin told me you're in?" Leo asked.

"I am," Brad answered. He looked like he was waiting to be introduced to me. Leo seemed to have no plans to do that. "I'm Brad," he said, taking the initiative.

I shook his hand. Woah. His hand was warm. His touch electric. It shot straight through me. I took a breath. "Haven," I said, letting it out.

"Don't bother," Leo said. "She's no one."

No one. Six months and I was no one. I'd met all his friends as his girlfriend. We'd slept together. We'd gone for a weekend to Mexico together. I was a model with a relative amount of fame in my own right. No one? And he said it in front of Brad fucking Pitt. I mustered up the barest of smiles for Brad whose expression was unreadable and walked out the exit.

I was so embarrassed. I couldn't go back in there. I took out my phone and sent a text.

To Cali: I had to go. Don't be mad.

Hers came back quick.

Cali: I get it. See you at home x

I put my phone away as a figure appeared beside me. I turned to find Brad Pitt standing inches from me. What was that smell? Was that him? He smelled good. Like the barest amount of an oaky cologne and a touch of whiskey on his breath when he spoke. "Hi."

"Hi," I said back. It was all I could manage.

"He's a dick," Brad continued, with half a shrug. I smiled. He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing. Was he nervous, too? "Do you want to go for a drink?" he asked.

Oh my god. Yes. Yes. Fuck yes. Brad Pitt? "Yeah," I said, hoping my voice wouldn't betray the sheer joy I was experiencing.

He smiled a little, walked over to the street and hailed an approaching taxi. he held open the back door. "After you."

https://www.wattpad.com/story/176006419-brad-brad-pitt-x-katherine-langford-complete VOTED #2 IN BRAD PITT FANFIC

Daisy Ridley: A New Hollywood Heroine

[ scans: daisy-ridley.net | translation by @afterblossom​​ | copy edits by @sleemo​​ ]

Disclaimer: This interview was translated from English to Chinese by GRAZIA and then back to English here, so these are not direct quotes from Daisy. Please excuse any awkward sentences. Some sections were difficult to translate. If you are sharing any part of this elsewhere - please give proper credit!!

GRAZIA has an exclusive interview with the most-wanted female lead in Hollywood who is the heroine in Star Wars: The Last Jedi. People [in China] call her “Dominant Daisy” and “Naïve Ridley/Rey”. Her Rey is the first female Jedi in the 40-year history of the Star Wars franchise. She is not only a Jedi in the film itself, but outside of it as well. She is concerned about social issues and, most importantly, has stayed humble after becoming a superstar. It doesn’t sound much easier than saving the universe. 

— GRAZIA China, January 2018

Just before Christmas, the most anticipated film Star Wars: The Last Jedi held its premiere in Shanghai. If you’re wondering what it felt like to be there, besides that the film was fantastic and you need to book your tickets early, it’s that it was excruciatingly cold! I wore three layers and was still freezing after I came home. It made me shiver just seeing how dedicated Daisy Ridley was, wearing nothing but a cheongsam-style dress. Even though the cold made her cheeks pink, she still signed autographs for fans and each time she saw them pulling out their phones, she immediately stood by and smiled, showing off her white teeth and reminding us of the fluffy Jelly Cat Toothy toys.

One day ago, I still didn't think that way. The day before the premiere, GRAZIA had an exclusive interview with this new representative heroine from Hollywood, and I couldn’t help but do some research about her, besides that after being chosen as the new lead of the Star Wars franchise, she lifted weights for 5 hours every day. Here are some other fun facts about her:

• She is a strict vegan. That means milk, eggs, and even food containing these ingredients is a no-no for her;

• Before Star Wars: The Force Awakens she produced and narrated a documentary called The Eagle Huntress. This is a very feminist story about a 13-year-old Mongolian girl named Aisholpan who is trying to challenge a long-held tradition that’s only been passed down to boys over hundreds of generations. The girl learns how to hunt with an eagle with the help of her father and becomes the first eagle huntress;

• After her fame skyrocketed, she didn't move to Hollywood. She is still living in her house in London with her family;

• She has no social media, no Twitter, no Instagram, no Facebook. During the interview, she said, “I don't want to be a part of social media. It’s not good for your health.”;

• Oh, and she had a pitiful deaf and blind dog named Muffin.

Five hours prior to the exclusive shoot and interview, I reached the Shanghai Disneyland Star Wars Launch Base. I already felt myself walking through a long path, and I couldn’t help but think—not to prejudge her, but it must be a long, hard, and lonely path. Is she always hard on herself? Lifting the heaviest weights; having a dog that is difficult to care for; supporting her most vulnerable friends; walking the loneliest path; avoiding any temptations that humans like us fall prey to? Or should we describe her like a piece of iron?

Once we started the interview, my worries went away, because all these things I mentioned above didn't affect her cute, charming and playful personality. She is like the metal BB-8, doing big things but still being cute. She sat on the sofa, cupping her chin, with her big round eyes, rubbing the tip of her nose with her right thumb (she did this at least 5 times, oh poor nose) she looked to me like a husky dog, asking out loud: "Hey, how are you doing today?"

After that, she showed us some BiaoQingBao (表情包) expressions [@afterblossom​: this is the Chinese version of memes or emojis]. When we ask about the difference between JJ Abrams and Rian Johnson, she said: “JJ is like that YOYOYO kind of guy, and Rian is huhuhu. Both of them are Star Wars fans, are good directors and screenwriters, but their temperament is different. JJ is more like heng! Rian is like en~en~”

You don't get it? Let GRAZIA translate it for you: “JJ is like those ‘Hey hey hey, give me more enthusiasm!’ sort of directors. Rian is the type who would be smoking a cigar, leisurely doing his crossword puzzles. JJ is more capricious, Rian is more steady.” Please don't praise us for our cleverness, because if you saw her snapping her fingers, crossing her legs pretending to smoke, you would totally get what she meant.

Her musical background meant that she would sometimes sing during our photo shoot in her free time. She is bright like the sun, unlike Rey, who is an orphan and a scavenger with a depressing story. "Rey is very patient, I am very stubborn. She doesn’t judge people and is far better than me... I'm trying to channel all her good personality traits, but she's saving the galaxy and I’m just a human being.”

Daisy is very modest. After being announced as the lead of the new trilogy, the 22-year-old actress’s attitude during filming was quite uncommon: “It’s the first time. La la la, just enjoy it.“ After Star Wars Episode VIII, her audition for The Force Awakens was released online and it was the interrogation scene with Kylo and Rey. You can see tears falling down her face, and even though she is wearing a simple mint green sweater and messy short hair, as a viewer you feel her emotions keenly and you can’t help but worry about her. Could not imagine these were sensations outside of method acting [Improved translation by @reylocalligraphy]: "I don’t stay in character forever, I'm more of a rational actor." 

Daisy is very lucky, and her Rey is not a regular heroine or female lead. After watching The Last Jedi, everyone suddenly realized that, from the start, she was quite different from other heroines. A Mary Sue? Not at all. "Rey has more space to develop. For some female characters, the script does not allow enough time and space to do that. But in this movie, you can see how she grows and what her relationship is to the people around her. With the previous Star Wars movies, even though we had Leia and the great, awe-inspiring performance by Carrie Fisher, in the end they were still male-centric films and the fans were mostly guys. But things are different now."

Was there any risk in joining Star Wars? She shook her head and it was like some question marks appeared over her head: "What risk?!” What if the audience doesn’t like your performance? What if people only remember you as Rey? Once again, she had a puzzled look on her face like a husky dog: "Wow you really dare to ask... but no, when I started I asked myself, can I do it? But if I do it, I refuse to worry about how people think of me, otherwise there is no way to do anything. It’s just going to diminish your ability to perform." 

She’s not afraid to be typecast—after Star Wars Episode VII, she worked on four more films which is set for release this year and each role was different from Rey. "How do I say this. I know as an actor there is a limit to what I can do, what I can achieve... but I didn't deliberately choose these roles that are different from Rey. It's that these cool, interesting characters found me and I am very lucky, through Rey, that I found more opportunities. One of them is a rabbit, how could it be the same? Let’s go and see."

Just like her skyrocketing fame, Daisy went from an unemployed rookie to the most wanted actress in Hollywood. In fact, she has a hard time explaining what the difference has been. Rumors say she will collaborate on a new movie with JJ Abrams: "It's not settled yet. Actually I’m very nervous because a lot of things have change in the past three or four years. I’ve done a lot that I never have before so I’m a bit worried. Will I be as good as last time?"

Perhaps we can see how she's changed through her perspective on Hollywood. Back when she had just made her debut, she said: "I admire Carey Mulligan and Felicity Jones." Now she says: "I admire a lot of actors, but now I’m more concerned with who I want to work with, like Emma Thompson, Meryl Streep..." Everyone wants to work with the big names, but clearly she has much more opportunity to do that now. She collaborated with all the masters on Murder on the Orient Express and the forthcoming Ophelia and even had a supporting role. 

This change makes her nervous: "I feel I have more responsibility now. I have a deeper understanding of the unfair treatment that women experience in this industry and in movies. When I realized this, I was shocked and it's now something I worry about. Every time I see girls who like Rey, I think: 'Oh my god, they like my acting?’”

"I don't think any one quality makes for a strong woman. Every woman is strong, as long you stay true to yourself.” Don't dwell on the past, just run towards the future. This young female warrior represents the newest trend of Hollywood heroine. Your strength comes from yourself, just like the lightsaber tips she gave us: "Lift more weights! Because what's in your hand is heavy, you need to build muscle. Remember, you're stronger than you think. Every time I train I think: no no no I can't, but actually I can!"

DAISY'S PLANS FOR 2018: A pet dog, school, and beautiful clothes!

Grazia: Between BB-8, a porg, and R2-D2, which one would you choose as a pet?

Daisy: Of course it would be BB-8, he is caring, capable, quiet and not that annoying.

G: Do you think BB-8 and your dog Muffin could become best friends?

D: If Muffin was still here I'm sure she would, but she passed away a couple of months ago (G: Oh I am so sorry!) No don't be! She’s already lived for 18 years, long enough for a dog, I think she had a very good life. When she was still around, we had a small BB-8 toy, and she wore this ‘What the hell is that’ expression on her face. Muffin's been with me since I was very young and nearing the end of her life, she could no longer see or hear anything, so she became very lazy and didn’t want to go anywhere. But she's adorable indeed.

G: Do you prefer dogs?

D: Absolutely. I'm allergy to cats, and some have told me that cats are related to some witchcraft and I think... umm, dogs are great. But I still like cats.

G: Do you think about owning a dog again?

D: Yes I do! But since 2017 I’m rarely at home, so I can't take care of it. But I still plan to have a dog in the future.

G: Your middle name is Jazz, any story behind it?

D: Nothing special, my dad likes it, just like my second sister Kika, and my eldest sister’s middle name is Sophia. It’s just a cool name.

G: Why did you become vegan?

D: I saw some documentary and it was very scary, especially about the dairy industry. So I made a decision and the next day I switched to a strict vegan diet.

G: Does being vegan affect your work-outs?

D: No. When I started and I was very busy and tired, I couldn’t tell if my body was actually tired or if it was because of my vegan diet. The key thing is that you have to make sure you’re getting enough nutrients. Before, when I was working on a film, their food was so good. Now that it’s done, I have nothing to eat at home and I have to learn how to cook.

G: You studied psychology before. Why is that? Is it to help with your acting performance?

D: No no, it has nothing to do with acting. I'm very interested in psychology because I’m interested in the motives behind human behaviour, the human brain, emotions, impulses, what is behind these things? It's interesting, but in the end I studied social research. (G: How is it?) It's boring! It was an introductory course. There were two options for me to choose from, between humanities and social research. I had studied humanities before so I was thinking: wow, this time I’ll pick something different! And I chose social research... in the end... but anyway I finished it and passed the exam. 

G: Why don't you continue? Too busy?

D: Yes, but next year I want to do another program. It’s a part-time course and I have 16 years to get all my credits. 6 courses need to be complete and each take 8 months. This is something I have wanted to do for a long time, so I plan to finish it.

G: Did you like today’s photo shoot? Does fashion interest you?

D: I liked it. Yesterday when I went back home I was thinking, I need to upgrade my wardrobe. Otherwise, I wear beautiful clothes during the day and make a big movie, then go home at night just to wear casual stuff... It’s time to dress better.

G: What’s the last piece of clothing you purchased?

D: A Stella McCartney sweater. It’s the first piece I brought from them. Very eco-friendly, comfortable and fashionable.

G: This is your second visit to China. Would you like to try something new while you’re here?

D: I still plan to go to TongLeFang (同乐坊) [@afterblossom: a creative market in Shanghai with lots of galleries], there is a Chinese store called "Spin旋", it's awesome, I've recommended it to many people. I still want to go to the Great Wall, but my family won't allow me. They want me to take them together.

DCOM Rankings #96: Bad Hair Day

So I guess this is one of those “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” things. The thumbnail image on Disney+ made it feel like it was some kind of goofy comedy for little kids. And that I was going to be in for a miserable 90 minutes. Thank the lord almighty that I was wrong.

I don’t know what the 2010’s DCOM’s have been doing but these movies in general have not been that bad! Yes of course there were a few duds but so far I haven’t had to grade any of these with a D. This movie follows that trend.

The movie starts off like it’s going to be stupid. But once Liz shows up, everything gets so much better. And it probably helps that it’s the mom from good luck Charlie that plays her, and she does it SO effing well. Like she is an amazing actress and knows how to be aggressive without being too aggressive. She was made for both the roles she was given. But yeah I really liked her as a character. I thought she was the exact foil that morgan needed.

Edit: so about this particular actress, literally as I was typing this I saw a video on Reddit of her at some sort of school PTA meeting ranting about not getting vaccinated or the “bullshit”rules about masks. Said that she’s a “California refugee” and had a “very successful Hollywood career” and that she’s better than everyone. Oh boy. Now I lost pretty much all my respect for her as a person. I didn’t think she was that kind of lady in real life. I guess that’s why she plays the role so well…it’s so sad to see ex Disney stars go off the deep end like this. But just wanted to point this out!

I guess I’ll start taking about the other characters while I’m at it. Morgan started off as a superficial Internet mini star who used online polls to have everyone else decide what she wears, eats, etc. She never decides anything for herself. And at first you’re like “oh it’s 2015 now everyone uses the Internet and social media like this” but then she gets into the reasons for why she does it and it broke my heart a little bit.

Side note: this movie got deep a little bit. I was surprised. When I was watching it, it didn’t really feel like a DCOM at times, it felt like a regular movie. That’s probably the best way to explain it. Morgan’s mom left her when she was 3 years old. And she has carried that guilt that somehow it was her fault that she left, for the rest of her life up to that point. I mean, mom’s do sometimes up and leave because they couldn’t handle the kid(s), I mean that can be a reason, a shitty reason but a reason, to leave. Maybe she said something that wasn’t meant for little morgan to hear. You don’t know that piece but you can kind of draw your own conclusions on that one.

Anyway, she felt that by being herself she was doing something wrong and therefore started asking everyone else how she needed to act, and now it delved into the 2010’s Internet culture with her online polls. Of course she still makes some decisions on her own, like the necklace that started the whole shebang. But this is the kind of character that I love because I love to analyze them on a deeper level (if they get that deep to begin with).

The rest of the characters are all pretty generic and one dimensional but that’s okay. As long as I care about my main character(s) then that’s fine. And the two leads were really good! This movie kind of reminds me of zootopia in the way the story is set up, they go on a quest to solve a mystery, they run into issues along the way, and it’s just a buddy cop movie. It’s fun! I like these kinds of adventures. The build up to the conflict was very believable, the conversations were believable, and while some of the scenarios did seem a little far fetched, it’s not totally and completely out of the question. Even though I knew that the ending would be happy, I didn’t know how this movie was going to end. And I think that’s what I really like about this movie, it wasn’t so predictable. There was obvious linkage between Liz and Morgan when people called them “mother and daughter” a million times in the movie, but honestly that mistake could happen in real life too. So I’m not too annoyed about that.

The overall theme is a slightly overused but good one, with a good modern spin to it. You can’t please everybody, but you can please yourself. You’re the only one who always has to live with the decisions you make (whether or not they affect other people) and if everyone else is happy and you aren’t, is it worth it? This is one of those things that I’ve been trying to work on myself. I don’t have an opinion on a lot of things because I don’t want to “take sides” or have a portion of people be angry at me. Even though it almost never happens! I’m such a people pleaser because I think it’s always so much easier to do something someone else wants to do than have my own opinion. And that just isn’t okay, especially if it makes me upset. There are some folks in my circle that are very picky about what we do/where we go, and I just give in because it’s not like I’ll be extremely pissed if we do this right? I gotta do what makes them most comfortable. I’ve always been such a free floater but that also leaves room for people to take advantage of that “oh, don’t worry she’ll do it, she can handle it” without even asking me.

Sorry I got off on a tangent. Point is, I know what Morgan is dealing with to an extent. The pacing in those movie is really good! Every action leads into the next action and so on. And I feel like that’s usually the case with these buddy cop movies, where they just go to the next piece of evidence which gives them a clue to the next one, and etc. But hey if it works it works. I’m not asking for an Oscar quality movie here. The humor was pretty funny. Some of it was a little cringey when Liz was trying to flirt. Like…okay no one is THAT bad at flirting.

One thing that I thought was weird was when the jewel thief threatened Monica that he’ll do something to her dad if she didn’t show up with the diamond. And then he sends her a picture of her dad all tied up but it’s SOOOO photoshopped. It’s so bad. I legitimately thought that the thief was joking and doesn’t really have him but you know that’s not true considering the last scene with the thief. But still I thought it was all just a trap to get her to fork over the diamond but nope he was really there all tied up. They could have done a video of him struggling and then I would be like ohhh okay he means business. Idk that was one thing I thought was strange.

Speaking of the villain, he was fine. Nothing to write home about but he fulfilled his villainy tasks and he was pretty threatening at times. Not the best villain ever but he did his job as his role in the story and that’s really all I can ever ask from a DCOM. At least he wasn’t super mustache twisty and crazy like some of the other villains in this line up.

I don’t think this movie has many bad aspects to it, just some little flaws here and there. And now that I know more about the good luck Charlie actress I don’t know if I would watch this movie anymore. Which is a huge bummer because the ending was super sweet and exactly what Morgan needed. The whole movie was pretty good. It ain’t fair lol.

Grading time I guess. Okayyyyyy well I think I was going to have this at an A but I think I’m going to put it in A- just because I don’t think I’ll watch the movie again. Maybe someday but now I’ll just have a bad taste in my mouth every time I see Liz on screen and that’s a problem because she’s one of the leads! Anyway, still an A-range movie but just lower on that scale. Originally I was going to put this above Cloud 9 but I would watch Cloud 9 over this because it was just so much more comforting. But whatever, still A range!!

Alrighty! Next movie is a sequel! Wooooo! And I bet it won’t be nearly as good! (Or necessary) but we’ll see!

hey katie--could you do a ranking of all of the amber benson movies you've seen, from favorite to least favorite? :)

This is an EXCELLENT question, thank you, Clem! I took it a little too seriously maybe (and i’m a little drunk and long-winded), but you asked, so I’m giving a good answer ;) 

I pulled out my handy dandy masterlist of Amber’s work and started categorizing her movies! (fun pic to clarify that i am the world’s biggest nerd)

Also please note that these are just my opinions - I am by no means a film critic or an expert on anything, I’ve just seen a lot of Amber Benson movies! 

Never seen: (if anyone has links, send em over please)Hollywood, PennsylvaniaLong Island Confidential

Not yet released: The Griddle HouseSelling IsobelThe Nightmare GalleryGlossary of Broken Dreams

Here’s where it gets fun!

Terrible:Act Your Age - this movie is not very good, and she’s hardly in it, so it gets a “terrible” ranking, yikes!

Meh all around (worst to best):The Blue Tooth Virgin - she’s in literally two minutes. i couldn’t watch the restDon’s Plum - i’ve only seen her parts! and apart from her face, i found them pretty unlikeable. :/ SFW - she’s in like ten minutes at the end. looking very adorable with round cheeks and round glasses. the rest of the movie is just okJack Reed (all three) - TV movies. She was SO YOUNG but she’s only in a couple scenes each. From what I’ve seen, they’re fine, nothing groundbreakingSimple Things - this is just bad, and she’s not really in it that much, but it could be worse. somehow. don’t ask me howKiss the Bride - again, i’ve only seen her parts, and they’re underwhelmingThe Crooked Man - so she plays a nice mom, and then she has a shotgun, and then she wears scrubs and gets murdered. she’s so pretty and tragic. but the whole movie is just…. so shitty and she’s only in 10 minutes of it. so it’s meh

Okay for plot, not for Amber:The Prime Gig - this is actually a pretty good movie! i enjoyed it. she’s really not in it much at all - definitely a background character, and she only has a few lines. but i sat through the whole movie and she looks super badass in her few appearances.Imaginary Crimes - another background character, but with many more lines this time. she’s very young and very adorable. another movie where i watched the whole thing, because it was good all around, and not just for her face! 

Okay for Amber, not for plot: Taboo - oh my god, Taboo. I rewatch this all the time because she’s extra hot in it - she plays drunk the whole time, and at one point wears a nightie and a collar - but oh my god it’s so bad. the plot is weird, the dialog is stilted, the acting is so wooden. just a terrible movie, but with one hot amberIntermedio - see above! she had a broken foot when they filmed this, and is on crutches the whole time. her hair is super long and she wears a pretty short skirt. those are the biggest selling points…. oh and she gets chopped in halfTripping Forward - ugh, i kinda hate this movie, because the leading guy makes me feel uncomfortable. i just don’t like his face or voice or personality. but amber is beautiful and cool and has streaks of blue in her hair. honestly you should skip watching this movie and just look at the beautiful gifs maria made insteadHoliday Wishes - this is hard, because it’s pretty bad, but i want to like it! it’s a christmas movie, she’s in love with a ghost, there’s some body switching, ugh. the plot just really irritates me and i find different things to complain about every time. and whoever dressed her should be fired. but she’s pretty and she’s the lead actress, so that has to count for somethingOne-Eyed Monster - never tell amber this, but i don’t like this movie…. she really likes it so it makes me feel bad to dislike it :/ it’s about these people shooting a porno in the mountains. she’s the makeup artist. ron jeremy’s dick gets possessed by an alien, and it impregnates amber and kills everyone else. it’s so weird and so not my humor…. but amber loves is and amber looks great in it, so, watch it i guess? Attack of the Gryphon - this would be ranked better if the gryphon wasn’t so flipping bad! the cgi just ruins the whole thing. well that and the evil sorcerer’s weird slutty sidekicks. i dunno. amber plays a badass, sword-fighting princess, and at one point (where she’s kissing a mediocre guy) you can see her whole back, which is lovely. she does a cute accent too. this is ranked highest in this category because she worked so hard to do the accent, ride a horse, fight with the sword, etc, but she couldn’t save this movie. Pretty decent:Latter Days - a heartwarming film about gay love! amber isn’t a huge character but she’s good.Another Harvest Moon - another heartwarming one, this time about folks in a nursing home. amber has blue hair again (what’s with her and blue hair) and it’s very sweet! The Crush - just. iconic. watch it. she’s so little and it’s just a really really good filmDust Up - a slightly weird Western horror type movie. lots of gore and drugs. she is a total badass at the end. and holds a baby! mom!amber! Desire Will Set You Free - the biggest selling point is the lesbian sex scene. i don’t super love most of the movie, probably because i’m a boring old lady who’s not involved in the berlin gay party/drug scene. but her parts are excellent and she kisses a lady!!!! and protects a beautiful trans lady! she’s so good! King of the Hill - possibly her favorite film she’s ever worked on, and one of her first. it’s really good. young Jesse Bradford is the lead character. she’s got a small part as his neighbor. she got to dance with him and kiss him! and then have a seizure on the floor. she’s very good and the film as a whole is excellent. long and slightly depressing, or maybe just bittersweet, but definitely a good one. House of Demons - this is high on the list because i literally just watched it. she’s a hippie! who time travels! and she trips on acid! she’s very pretty and angelic, and the film has a really interesting premise. definitely will watch again. The Killing Jar - oh i unabashedly love this. she’s a small-town waitress who gets held hostage at her restaurant. no spoilers but she doesn’t die, woohoo, and is a lowkey badass. add her pretty face and southern accent and it’s just great.

Amazing:Can’t Hardly Wait - ok forget the fact that she’s in it for like two seconds, i fucking love this movie, it’s so goodBye Bye Love - tiny teenage amber and eliza! ahh i love this. another heartwarming one. she has a decently big role and she’s just so cuteChance - YES. love. so much respect for amber. she wrote and produced and directed and starred and edited. and kissed james marsters. and was amazing. go watch this! it’s on youtube! she’s incredible! Lovers, Liars, and Lunatics - all of the above (minus the kissing) but better. funnier and tighter. she’s an adorable clumsy burglar. it’s excellentStrictly Sexual - ohhhhh god oh god. she’s not the most likeable character but holy fuck is she sexy. there’s just…. a lot of sex and drinking and smoking, a lot of excellent outfits, a lot of cursing, a lot of amber being to-die-for sexy and gah. plus she’s in the whole thing! as ¼ of the main cast! lots of sexy amber! Race You To the Bottom - !!!! i love this movie!!! so much!!!! she is just incredible. and it’s a good movie too! i mean again she’s not the most likeable, and neither is her love interest, but it’s okay because she’s so hot! and she’s again in the whole thing, but this time as ½ of the main cast, and therefore she gets almost ½ of the screentime and it’s so so so good7 Things To Do Before I’m 30 - MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE AMBER MOVIE. oh my god it’s just the most amazing thing i’ve ever seen. she’s so adorable through the whole thing, and she’s IN the whole thing! as the star! the lead character! the one who all the plot revolves around! !!!!! do you know how groundbreaking that is for an amber movie!!!! not to mention she looks SMOKING the whole time. i mean how many times have i reblogged the bikini scene??? watch it for that alone. you’ll start it for the bikini and then continue for the adorable love story and her character arc. oh my god just go watch this movie now

to anyone who read this whole thing… bless your heart. thank you clem for letting me yell about amber so much. i think ive spent my whole tumblr career building toward this ask. thank you thank you and i love you clem and i love you all and i love amber benson the most!!!!

(see we’ve come full circle because clem made this for me and now i’m amber hugging clem) (does that make sense)

Grace Kelly, photographed by Jean Howard, on the cover of Everybody’s, a UK tabloid.

After only four years in films, Miss Kelly, daughter of a wealthy Philadelphia building contractor, has become the most sought-after young lady in Hollywood. Every studio, every director wants her, always to cast her as the leading actor’s “good, young wife." The Bridges at Toko-Ri will mark the sixth time in as many films that she has played the part. It is an odd, almost unprecedented role through which to achieve film fame. The answer may be that audiences like an occasional change, that they welcome Miss Kelly’s cold beauty and ladylike demeanour as a pleasant relief from all the blonde bombshells who have gone before. 

Kelly may grace the cover, but the interior article is a puff piece that focuses on her Bridges at Toko-Ri costar, William Holden. Click below to read it.

William Holden is his name, and The Bridges at Toko-Ri his latest film. And yet no one is less like a film star

As typecast by the public, the typical actor comes equipped with a long, low, snow-white sports car upholstered in red leather, a heated swimming pool shaped like a shamrock, a Filipino butler who lays out his ties and stalls eager ladies on the telephone, a camel hair polo coat belted with a knotted loop, a white silk scarf and brown or blue suede shoes.

It is impossible to think of Bill Holden in such terms. He doesn’t look the part, act the part nor react to the part.

He is a leading representative of a slowly evolving school of male movie stars, a new breed composed of uncrazy, non-mixed-up types as opposed to those who would strive to conform to the myth of Valentino.

The man who performed so brilliantly in Sunset Boulevard, who gained an Oscar for his work in Stalag 17, who played opposite Audrey Hepburn in Sabrina Fair, and now joins with Grace Kelly in The Bridges at Toko-Ri is no balloon-head who has suddenly soared aloft.

With him there have been no suspensions, no mysterious disappearances; no whiffs of marijuana, no gadding about the world as half of a twosome minus marriage lines. He is responsible, dependable, quiet in manner, and conservative in dress.

He is, in fact, a most un-typical movie actor. Some actors feel that intelligence doesn’t pay; that it’s unnecessary for acting; that it is a handicap and, if possessed, must be concealed. Holden refuses to admit the truth of such loony talk. He doesn’t admit that intelligence can be a drawback in any profession. When Bill Holden was still Bill Beedle, a late-teenage Pasadena boy, he was willing to pass up his chance of becoming a movie star in favour of a junior-college exam which he considered more important.

To backtrack for a moment to show what kind of person the Bill Beedle was who made this decision, it is pertinent to note that his father’s business had largely to do with fertilisers, and that Bill was not coddled during his early years.

He visited plants engaged in processing fertilisers, took a sample of the product they made, brought it back to his father’s laboratory for analysis. Most of the time it was a smelly job. He worked in boxcars from Mexico full of steer-blood meal or fish meal or bone meal. If it was hot, he emerged with so much dry steer-blood adhering to him that he seemed to be bleeding to death.

He also did a great deal of daredevil motorbike riding. One day his mother arrived home to find a crowd before her South Pasadena house. They were staring at Bill as he stood on the seat of his motorcycle, his arms spread wide, as he cruised up and down the street.

(“You set your throttle at a certain speed,” he told me. “You stood on the seat. You manoeuvred by weight and by balance. No hands; no brains either.“)

His mother called out, "If you fall, I’ll send you to the hospital.” He paid no attention. She raised her voice and added, “And I won’t come to see you.’”

“This isn’t dangerous!” Bill shouted back.

“Then why is the crowd watching you?” she demanded.

“Because they can’t do it themselves!’’ he said and continued his cruise.

Bill’s father’s ambition for his son to join him in the chemical fertiliser business never materialised. A school play about the Curie family of radium fame, in which Bill was cast as the eighty-year-old Pierre Curie, Sr., intervened.

A Paramount talent scout, Milton Lewis, saw the play, asked Bill Beedle to look him up the following morning.

"Sorry,” the youngster told him, “but I have an exam, and I don’t want to miss it.”

“Opportunity only knocks once,” Lewis reminded him.

“This one will have to knock twice,” young Beedle replied.

Lewis tried irony. “When you’ve taken care of the really important things, give me a call at Paramount,” he said.

A week later Beedle dropped in. Asked to portray a character from a play in which he’d appeared, he did the eighty-year-old Pierre Curie, Sr. His choice was not difficult. Pierre Curie, Sr., was the only character he had ever played.

But at least it encouraged the studio to give him a further screen test and as a result of that take an option on his services.

He was re-christened Bill Holden but received no work until his screen test was seen by another company. Columbia Pictures only asked to see it because of their interest in the girl who played opposite Holden. But, it was Holden who caught their eye.

He was so obviously the man to play Golden Boy, a boxing violinist, in their projected film of that title. They’d already tested eighty-five applicants. Now Holden the non-applicant was given the part.

Golden Boy made a lot of money. As a result, Bill had a prophetic, if fleeting, hint of what it could mean to be ‘hot’ in the industry.

Every studio wanted him. In his first four pictures, he worked at four different studios.

But then came the war. He gained a commission in the Army Air Force and was put to work on propaganda programmes and camp entertainments. He understood why he was put to such use, but he would have much preferred flying assignments, especially after the Japanese got his brother, Bob, who was stationed on a carrier.

He sums up his years in the Air Force in a few sentences. “I got married (his wife Ardis was also an actress). I went away to war. Then I came home and saw my wife. Our first son, Wes, was born in November of 1943. I went away again and came back again. Our second son, Scotty, was born right after the war.”

Bill went straight back into films after leaving uniform, although by now there was not so much competition for his services. It took him seven hard years to get near the top again, but then came Sunset Boulevard and he was there—this time, it seems, for keeps.

“The thing with Holden,” says Billy Wilder who directed him in Sunset Boulevard and Stalag 17, “is that he didn’t become, overnight, the biggest, the most sensational leading man in the profession, then two pictures later fall flat on his rear. He grew, and his growth was a healthy thing.“

Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles - 40+ - https://shorthaircutsmodels.com/julianne-houghs-short-haircuts-and-hairstyles/ - Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, The Special posted after. Showed off her new haircut on Instagram. She constantly changes her hair for roles. Lowkey is unfair on how he can pull off any style. He can shake a buzzcut if he wants. The sooner Julianne gets squeezed out of her hair. The more possibilities there will be one day. Celebrity hairstylist Nine Zero would find a way to do business in a salon Riawna Capri. Julianne allows her natural roots to grow to try something different Capri says. Blunt chic bob has never worked together for over years. I love that we can still do something new after all this time. Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, seems in vain to deny that all the shoulder dusty hairstyles she has shown us do not suit her. Every style she tried made us see her in a different light and gave her personality a different vibe. Julianne proves that those who think short hairstyles are limited are absolutely wrong. Julianne Hough's Haircuts and Hairstyles Here you will see 12 different and famous Julianne hough short hairstyles which will come in handy when we cut our long hair short. While Hair Trends tended to come and go every season, blunt bob remained one of the most popular haircuts from 2020 through 2021. Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, What makes the cut so appealing is its versatility. These hair types work well across a range of facial shapes and can be styled in a handful of shapes. Are you ready for the understatement of the century. Julianne Hough blonde hair Julianne Hough has beautiful hair. And we know we agree. years later he was one of the top sought-after celebrities Allure.com and so for thought and inspiration we have collected 37 of his most memorable appearances in the past decade. Remember the coronation braid. Julianne Hough's Short Hairstyles Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, And black headband days. How effortlessly about a low bun with a nailed crosshatch piece. You need to click on a few things that are abundantly clear. Julianne Hough parted her long blonde soft curly hair, which looked very pretty with this side. Julianne Hough's Haircuts If you're looking for a simple, easy everyday long wavy hairstyle that's comfortable no matter what your hair color is blonde brown dark or other colors, you can try it perfectly. This really is a gorgeous tousled long soft curly hairstyle for women. Jagged layers are cut from the edges and retracted to lighten the length and encourage the movement of soft waves this cut is perfect for summer days. Julianne Hough's Hairstyles Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, It's fun and easy to recreate the hairstyle at home with the right tools and products, where you need regular fixes every 5 weeks to maintain that long hairstyle and avoid split ends. This round oval square heart is one of the most popular everyday hairstyles for women, perfect for Triangular Face Shapes. Julianne Hough hair color That is love. Dancer and actress Julianne Hough has received a dramatic haircut and looks like a new person. For the past few months Hough has been rocking his signature blonde beach waves. But on Wednesday the dancer debuted an. Julianne Hough's Short Hair Julianne Alexandra Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, Anna Wintour-inspired haircut and is almost unrecognisable. Hough cut all the wavy locks in favour of the blunt bob and bang combo. As designers showcase their Spring/Summer 2020. Julianne Hough hair products Collections and style stars on the streets before and after presentations, it's safe to assume that your attention is currently being channeled across the pond. the ends and long layers of this are jagged cut and jammed with the product to achieve a well-defined look and feel. Julianne Hough's Hair Julianne Alexandra Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, This low fuss yet hairstyle is perfect for a. Long facial frame and is easy to maintain. Take a look at his previous appearances. With a hint of Old Hollywood glamour, Julianne Hough goes to wave softly rolling along the length reserved for her side. A combination of layers is cut from the sides and back. How do you get Julianne Hough hair? Julianne Alexandra Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyls, Making this hairstyle versatile enough to wear out and make it wispy or down and smooth depending on the situation. It needs product to keep cool and shine, and is perfect for turning heads on any day or night occasion. It corrects regularly every 4 to 6 weeks to maintain shape. Julianne Hough curly hair Julianne, who has a heart-shaped face shape and a low hairline, looks best with an overgrown fringe and longer layers around the face. This wavy bob creates a beautiful frame for his face and allows him to do his thing by adding his haire natural texture to the body and bounce it all over while softening up his jaw line. Julianne Hough's Best Hairstyles of All Time Julianne Alexandra Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, The brushed surface of her waves gives her platinum. Blonde locks a smooth and glossy look, while maximising body and volume. Julianne Hough hair stylist Of gold and bright blue eyes. This makes it suitable for hair colours with a yellow sole and can go super light as seen here. This platinum blonde tone is hard for most people to pull off but with her complexion and fine Tan This is a very natural look for Julianne. Does Julianne Hough have thin hair? Julianne Alexandra Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, Regular ash toning treatments are required to keep brassy tones at bay. Long layers are cut at the edges of this light blonde mane to facilitate the edges making it easy to tweak with the product to achieve textured ends. The upper middle part smoothed down the contour of the head with this making it a fab to make a rounded face frame. Most Famous Julianne Hough's Short Hairstyles This medium length has well-defined waves from the back and sides to achieve this striking shape, which is best suited to framing a long face for any occasion. The long blasts are swept sideways to soften the face and brilliantly complete the entire hairstyle. What Color Is Julianne Hough's hair? Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, The product is required to hold and Polish. There is no need for highlighting here as this hair colour looks the most vivid on its own. The deep side part and super swoopy fringe give this short coif appeal. Stunning do is easy to reuse with the right tools and needs strong retention product to keep you in place all day or night. Julianne Hough's Best Short Hair Looks This particular shade of blonde has cool ash shades that give her strands a cool look. Making this mid-length is best suited to compliment a long face worn in loose waves from the sides and back to look at plenty of movement and shape. These long blasts are swept to one side to soften the face and complete the hairstyle perfectly. How do you know if short hair will look good on you? The product is required to keep this style in place all day or night. and you can't be blamed because some serious chic stuff is falling off you've seen Kendall Jenner's fresh blonde hair, right?. But that doesn't mean fashion folks come stateside to a grinding halt. The crop have many stylish moments, and Julianne Hough's bob haircut is testament. Julianne Hough Hairstyles, Hair Cuts and Colors If you haven't had the chops yet, note that Hough's this trend is here to stay in the fall. As a judge on America's Got Talent this season, there was no shortage of glamorous moments as the dancer and actor walked both on screen and on the red carpet. Julianne Hough brown hair Hough stayed true to her plunging style in her glossy platinum blonde lob which slicked back all the way through and into a low ponytail. But in the agt finale, which aired September. How do you get Julianne Hough beach waves? The NBC At 18 star made a shocking and much shorter new do when she stepped up to her photo in a stunning red sequin number and matching op with little red lip. The polished real bob now falls a good couple inches above his shoulders which tends to favour him on the AGT set before grazing those glam sequined ensembles. Julianne Hough Short Hair Pictures Ideas Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, And according to hough and hairstylist Riawna Capri, she made the decision to do the scene impulsively backstage just before the show's finale. It's the only clue the fans have. She changed her hair a few times but it wasn't as dramatic as it is now. The 30-year-old dancer and actress went with a bold new look that is already turning heads. Who does Julianne Hough's hair? Celebrity hairdresser Riawna Capri first showed off Hough's new look on Instagram and has now shared photos of herself with Hough. His new look is a very short bob with bangs. Yeah, boom. It's a bold look that not everyone can pull off but Hough looks great. Detachment from what you know can be difficult but it can also liberate. The best thing about hair is how to create the game and just get to have fun with it. Julianne Hough hair in safe haven With just a few weeks left in 2022, celebrities are preparing to enter the new year by flocking to the hall for a new haircut. Following Kaia Gerber's a line pixie and Chrissy Teigen's 70s lovemaking, Julianne Hough is the latest star to overhaul her current look. Last week, Hough visited hairstylist Riawna Capri at Nine Zero One Salon in Los Angeles and stepped out with a 90s-inspired blunt bob. How do you get a Julianne Hough haircut? Capri revealed the star's new cut in an Instagram post. Julianne Bob is blunt structured and almost all Capri said in an email is the length of her hair. 90s chic gives us a bit of Claire Danes biting the so-called life/Wynona Rider in reality. Julianne Hough long hair Simple and stylish is a thick blunt classic bob but the modern twist is the way of styling to be super perfect and make just a little flare. Although he was well known for having buttery or platinum blonde. Julianne Hough short hair safe haven Hair Hough toned his colour. Working together for over 10 years, we've never done this kind of blunt super short bob Capri. Classic 90s chic inspired by Claire Danes supposed life and Winona Ryder's Reality Bites. A flashback reference to Danes from My So-Called Life shows the similarity between styles, with Hough only finished with a 2020 twist. The cut has simple blunt lines, which Capri explains. But the way you cut it makes it modern. How do you get the messy hair look for short hair? Julianne Hough's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, I like it a little messy not super perfect with a little flair. There's a new fashion model to follow recently who transformed this blonde mane into waves of fingers from the top for a classic look and feel. It needs time to build your hairstyle and is ideal for the product to hold and shine and for any special occasion. Julianne Hough is a two-time professional champion of ABC's dancing with the stars nominated for a. Julianne Hough haircut 2020 - 2021 Creative Arts Primetime Emmy for Outstanding Choreography in 2020. Of course, Hough's appreciation of her hair can't ignore the importance of her relationship with longtime stylist Riawna Capri. There is only one way to achieve. Julianne Hough new hair Such wonderful looks but the bravery style and lifelong friendships certainly won't hurt. Even if you're too young to get cultural references in the 90s and early 00s, a quick Google search of the best haircuts of the era will show you that these styles are cool again. Can you be pretty with short hair? For example Brad Pitt brought back the same floppy haircut he wore when he was married to Jennifer Aniston only those locks are left out to fall over shoulders showing loose waves added medium lengths to the ends for volume and body. Julianne Hough hair bob Long blasts are swept across her forehead to soften her face and perfectly complete her entire hairstyle. The product is essential for retention and shine, and regular ornaments will help prevent split ends. Julianne Hough natural hair color How short you are about it. The back and sides are tapered into the head while the top is layered and left long enough to wear forward and straight to achieve this head turning style. It is swept across the front to soften the face and completes the whole style magnificently. It corrects regularly every 4 to 6 weeks to maintain this shape, and a small amount of the product helps it stay on the ground all day or night. What is the best product for spiking short hair? These mid-length do ends are jagged to give a textured look and then sway from Root to tip, allowing the back and sides to fall flat for a simple but fab surface. This look is best suited for those with thin and medium hair and needs a small amount of product to shine. Julianne Hough new hairstyle Julianne Hough goes for a romantic look here with long tousled waves. He has a heart-shaped face with a strong jawline, beautifully softened by long loose waves. Julianne Hough safe haven haircut It is secured with a hot cylinder by rolling around sections of fog in front of it and with thermal forming spray until it cools. Roll back the rollers and use a soft furry brush to create rolling waves. Part to one side and then mist with the hairstyle to hold the middle to the finish. Julianne Hough is a triple threat known for her amazing song dancing and acting ability. She is a former judge on America's Got Talent and dancing with the stars. How do you spike really short hair? She also plays Jolene's iconic character in Netflix's Dolly Parton series heartstrings. Julianne and her brother Derek Hough recently filmed a Christmas special called Holidays with the Houghs. She learned to skate for a musical number for the special. It was madness to be thrown like a disc at the Olympics about it. You can't do anything unnecessary to tell Julianne. Julianne Hough became a style icon overnight last year when she cut her long waves for choppy bob, and what I became obsessed with. I'm not afraid to confess. Julianne Hough haircut safe haven Given her style has improved immensely since her dancing with the Stars day but it was her haircut that brought her new look full circle. And while many chose Bob last year, no one succeeds like Julianne. It's all about that perfectly messy texture. I love I want I need. How do you use texturizing spray on short hair? Seriously remember Julianne is another celebrity who would like to try up new styles and look equally glamorous with any of them. Okay, you can say she's lucky to have such good hair, but it's not just about genes. It's about her ability to choose a hairstyle that suits her best. We want you to draw inspiration from Julianne Hough's hair. You can try any of Julianne Hough's hairstyles, which are always an example of good taste. Julianne Hough hairstyles 2020 - 2021 The truth is, it's great when a woman isn't afraid to experiment with tissues. Let's take a tousled structure joined by smooth locks. Doesn't it look great? This was just one example, and there's so much more here. The most impressive hair she wears is wavy bob, which is utterly uplifting and overwhelming. He effortlessly carries all sorts of cool bob. The wavy relaxed one accentuates his special talent to perfection. What are the best hair products to use for a short pixie cut? The tousled ripples that flow through the air echo through her delicate and flawless facial features and silhouette. A Retro wavy person makes him look absolutely noble and untouchable. A gorgeous outfit with slightly curled back braids set a chic chic figure for the overall look. It also lowers her incredibly perfect long straight and wavy hair. Julianne Hough haircut Almost all her hairstyles glow with her look. Now you're obsessed with your hair. Why don't you buy one? Dancing with the Stars alum Julianne Hough is known for her shoulder length very light blonde hair. He also starred in the 2021 drama film Safe Haven. As an American professional ballroom dancer, country music singer and actress, her unique and unique taste in hair and clothes is truly uplifting for all of us and worth imitating. Julianne Hough hair 2020 - 2021 Who says short hair can't be styled. Julianne Hough is a great example of how short hair can have a wide variation of style, like long hair. With short hair braided into a Mohawk you're all ready and ready for a fancy event. Check out these short and cute braided hairstyles. Blunt bobs have been a favorite hairstyle among celebrities this season. Have you seen fresh cuts by Taylor Schilling, Demi Lovato and Mädchen Amick. Julianne Hough hair safe haven One recent lister to cut his hair is none other than Julianne Hough. Hough has Riawna Capri to thank for his new haircut. The hairdresser posted a photo of the awards ceremony on the front Billboard with fresh thick blunt chops in the caption. If you haven't heard of celebrities left and right getting into Bob's life, it's style and it's not going anywhere anytime soon. Hough pays homage to the 90s with a chin-length bob of the same length. Julianne Hough hairstyles short It makes your roots grow a little bit, because who cares. with perfectly imperfect tissue. The thing is here. Bobs should be effortless aka less work and you don't need to look much done. His big chops are courtesy of Star stylist Riawna Capri at Los Angeles-based salon Nine Zero One. The early 2023 and 2020 remix is even ier. Now Julianne Hough is taking us back. The 31-year-old actress has just come into bends to polish a fresh chin length bob piece y and add size to this loosely textured mid-length style. Julianne Hough new haircut Start with roughly dry hair. twist small sections of hair and wrap them around a loosely curled wand while holding a good grip at the end. Once all sections are done lightly tousle and shred with a drop of pomade. Julianne Hough hair in footloose Home and needs product for brightness and grip. Julianne Hough goes out casual or as simple and elegant as making here ideal for a formal night out. Julianne's hairdos look great with heart facial shape and especially have facial features as impressive as these dos. Her medium-thin hair was. Julianne Hough hair images Loosely pulled back into a high chignon that created volume at the top of the head. Strands of hair were swept back and left out to frame her face for a soft surface while it was safe. In general this hairstyle works well for the face shape and low forehead and makes the most of natural hair texture. Julianne Hough safe haven hair tutorial Julianne looks best in beige and platinum shades thanks to her natural dark blonde and tanned skin tone and bright blue eyes. An Instagram post was posted by hough about a week before the finale in which he used a pair of hair-cutting scissors. At least it's clear he didn't cut those golden locks himself. Julianne Hough hair short Follow up with furry ears and Hough cut the wires hidden behind the famous baby blue and pink cheeks and a classic red lip to uncover. But to add some interest she opted for a sprinkling of gold glitter in her piece ensuring all eyes were on the new style spur of the moment. Julianne Hough haircut short If anything this is the brightest example, but a bob is in line for next season. Lady Gaga's highly anticipated new film A Star Is Born premiered last night, and Julianne Hough took the opportunity to show something new on her own. a new bob haircut. Julianne Hough hair colour The dance pro stole the show with her cropped ‘do and bang paired with a white wide leg pantsuit and a beautiful berry lip. Hough's new jaw-length cut has no shortage of texture, and its fringes frame her face perfectly. Authority. We adore Julianne Hough. Julianne Hough rock of ages hair The singer dancer and actress is really a triple threat and recently on Grease Live and her career as a whole to be her gorgeous husband and as we discovered her hair and make-up. All wore these platinum blonde locks down the sides and back to give the style subtle movement and bounce on in loose waves. This comfortable style is easy to reuse with the right tools at home and your hair needs a little product to fly away and tame. Julianne Hough hair tutorial safe haven He takes a formal updo and creates an edgy hairstyle with much interest. Julianne usually keeps her hair medium-length to match her heart-shaped face. Julianne Hough short hair tutorial Here she softens her stronger jawline by wearing a longer side-swept fringe and some return branches. The deep side part and side sweep burst provide some coverage to the forehead while creating a look-out effect. Julianne has light blue eyes and a peach skin tone that makes her most suitable in soft beige blonde shades and icy platinum shades. Julianne Hough bob safe haven Multi-talented Julianne goes for a multi-dimensional blonde base with thin iced white highlights throughout. This gives her hair a natural-looking light blonde shade that flattens her peachy complexion and showcases her light blue eyes. Take an eye. add styling lotion to dried hair with a towel and dry it in various directions using a Denman or ventilation brush, depending on your hair texture. Julianne Hough short hair how to Run the styling cream from the dry hair, create a deep side section and push the fringe to one side. Inspired by the Claire Danes of the 90s, we dare say this is about my life and a modern classic. Even when Julianne tries to be comfortable with her looks she still knows they look unique and personalised. Blunt bob with dyed grey will always shake any short hair game. Hough has long put her hair in the hands of celebrity stylist Riawna Capri who crafted the star's newest and most drastic transformation. Julianne Hough hair extensions I'm obsessed with everything for this fresh death chic. She also tagged Mélanie Inglessis, who created the actress glowing make-up look. See Hough's latest hairstyle in the future. Perfect everyday hairstyle. Julianne Hough makes this hairstyle such fun. Julianne Hough haircut bob As you can see Julianne is rocking the waves as well as making it fun to give some much needed life and volume look. You will need to fix your hair every 6 weeks to keep the ends of your hair fresh and keep the style in shape. You also need to repeat the color every 6 weeks as well to keep the color from fading. Take an eye. Add foam or styling spray at the root and dry with a ventilation brush, removing sections at the root for light lifting. Julianne Hough hairstyle Meanwhile Riawna Capri Julianne Hough's stylist sees her actress as her muse. Maybe that's the reason behind all these super-hot hairstyles. Anyway, we recommend looking at all these beautiful Julianne Hough's hairstyles to find one for yourself. The Riawna Capri stylist actually cuts the rough texture to her hair. Julianne Hough red hair You need the product to keep it funky, and it fixes it regularly to maintain its brightness and shape. "With wet hair it's hard to see the texture and the finish tends to be more blunt, Capri said a dry cut provides a softer line. Julianne Hough hair footloose Instead of thick layers or a blunt bob, wavy ends will make any texturizing spray or pomade applied to the ends to add oomph to the cut. Tighten the hair to hold the product from just above the ears to the tips. Julianna always leaves her hair a little straighter to avoid the appearance of " great hair. How to get Julianne Hough hair New styles such as avantgarde updos for beginners try a signature and recognisable style mid-length of Girl siren red fibers and threads and the beach has maintained a balance that is almost impossible to secure in the waves. The deep side section and side-sweeping bursts give it some coverage while creating a look-out effect. Julianne Hough hair long Julianne has light blue eyes and soft beige blonde shades and a peach skin tone which makes her hair colour best suited for icy platinum blonde shades. Here she goes for a light ash blonde base with thin iced white highlights throughout. Julianne Hough short hair  This gives her hair a natural-looking light blonde, which brings out her eye colour and flattens her complexion. This medium-length make Rough Cut Cut then shake to add the body to the roots of the blow and jam with the product at the ends for a textured look and feel. This comfortable hairstyle is perfect for thin ones with medium hair and is easy to manage with regular fixes every 4 to 6 weeks. Julianne Hough hair tutorial Julianne Hough looks lovely here in a simple shoulder length bob with a windblown finish. This â€do high volume style jazz is a great way to add extra volume to a bob up and fine straight hair. Julianne has a combination of heart and square face shapes with a strong jawline. This makes it suitable for soft light styles with too many layers around the face. Julianne Hough burlesque hair Here her do frames her beautiful face while Wispy texture adds a soft surface around the jawline. The deep side part and grown fringe are also ideal for a low forehead and straight hairline. It's a stunning hairstyle with jagged layers cut from the edges to lighten the length, making styling easy for the shape. Julianne Hough hair red This is the perfect style for those with thin to medium hair who want a style with a long facial compliment volume. Another day, another bob. The actress and Dancing With The Stars legend Julianne Hough shed a few inches off her lob to try a blunt bob for the first time ever.

THE WAITER - AFTER A DECADE OF BIDING HIS TIME BUSING TABLES AND POURING DRINKS, RED-HOT ACTOR MARK RUFFALO IS FINALLY STARTING TO CLEAN UP.

September 4, 2004

Author/Byline: William Booth - The Washington Post

Mark Ruffalo is sitting alone in the back of Victor's Deli in Los Angeles in late afternoon sun, a weekday, the place dead. He is wearing a blue velour jacket, jeans and a loose, white button shirt. The silver chain around his neck holds a St. Christopher medal, patron saint of protection. He is rumpled, hair and clothes, like he just came out of the dryer. He waves hello.

Not too long ago, during his decade as a struggling actor, this was the kind of place where Ruffalo punched a time clock. He was a busboy at the faux-'50s malt shop Ed Debevic's, where 10-year-old girls have their birthday parties. He was a waiter, doorman, caterer, bartender at a series of now-shuttered watering holes where he slung martinis and Midori cocktails to the Hollywood swells. He painted houses. And dug holes and stuck plants in the ground, and thought a lot about going back to Wisconsin to work for his dad, where he would make a new life sandblasting water towers. He acted in more than 30 plays in 10 years. At the bars he worked, Ruffalo would hand fliers to customers; they never came to see him on stage. "You're totally invisible," he remembers. "You're just a conduit between them and a drink. Like a drug dealer. Of course, 99 percent of what people say in bars is absolute crap. Girls come to understand this rather quickly." Ruffalo laughs; he laughs a lot, a slurry heheheheh. It's a good thing he didn't quit because now he's one of the most interesting actors working in Hollywood -- appearing in both the thriller Collateral and We Don't Live Here Anymore, an intense film opening Friday based on the short stories of Andre Dubus in which he cheats on his wife (Laura Dern) with his best friend's spouse (Naomi Watts). Maybe because he was trained in the theater, Ruffalo, 36, can actually act, and his work in even mediocre films is often singled out. He repeats a mantra: You serve the material. He possesses the craft to disappear into his characters, and some of them are not very appealing, but they are not dull. Ruffalo -- say "rough," not "roof" -- broke into the public consciousness by going east, earning an off-Broadway rave as a slouchy, funny, nihilistic brat in Kenneth Lonergan's 1997 play This Is Our Youth. A New York critic compared Ruffalo to a young Marlon Brando. That's the kind of press that changes a career. Ruffalo followed it with the lead in Lonergan's film You Can Count on Me (2000) for his turn as Terry, a boy-man, lost but redeemable. The kind of man women cook eggs for in the morning. Then he worked beside Robert Redford in The Last Castle and Nicolas Cage in Windtalkers. Then, just as he began to orbit, Ruffalo plunged back to Earth. It was almost like a movie: The talented young man had a very bad dream that something was growing inside his head. And when the surgeons laid him out on the cold table, and opened his skull, they found that he was quite right. He had a brain tumor that was, mercifully, pronounced benign. He's OK now. But he is also a changed man. And, he thinks, probably a better artist for it. But what a way to learn. He orders lemonade with iced tea. "I can't bring myself to call it an Arnold Palmer," he says.

A STREET-FIGHTER TYPE

To describe Ruffalo as good-looking doesn't do it. He is handsome in the Italian way, lean and lithe and hairy, dark meat to Brad Pitt's white, with a Roman nose and a full mouth and emotive eyes that, in his movie roles, register confusion and wound and hunger. "For all those years it felt like Los Angeles just didn't get me," he says. "This one casting director told me they don't look for guys like you out here in L.A. They look for guys like you in New York. ... Out here, maybe episodic TV turns out a beautiful, easily accessible type. I was blue-collar, street-fighter type. The darker tones, you know? That's what they said." He pauses. "Although you never really know what anybody is talking about. That's one of the problems with language." In his press clips, he's often referred to as the thinking woman's sex symbol, and as the New York detective in Jane Campion's kinky In the Cut (2003), he gives good reason for the rep when he sets upon co-star Meg Ryan like a starving man at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Ruffalo didn't go to college, instead attending the Stella Adler Academy, the well-regarded Los Angeles acting school that trained Robert De Niro and Chris Cooper. Benicio Del Toro was the star pupil. Ruffalo estimates that he went to more than 800 auditions in eight years. "I wasn't getting anything. I tried for voice-overs, commercials, TV, everything," he says. What he eventually got was a Clearasil commercial. Then he won a couple of parts in little horror movies. They were not good films. "It is so hard. Not a good job for depressives. For manics it's OK. I'm really envious of the manics," Ruffalo says. "I only got one-half of the equation." His talent agency dumped him. "I wasn't making them any money, so who could blame them?" he says. "I was doing whatever I could to get before a camera, even to the point of lying to do a non-SAG, nonunion movie so I wouldn't get bounced out" of the Screen Actors Guild. "But I got thrown out anyway because I didn't pay my dues for two years. I went to them and threw myself before the board: Man, I haven't been working. I'm starving. I'm depressed. They were like, cough it up." Ruffalo must have thought of quitting. "All the time," he says. "A lot of times where in the darkest night of the soul, you wanta give up everything. You work so hard, it means so much, and so little return, or encouragement, and you're just, screw this, I can't go on like this. It's too hard on me. Something about it, it's maddening. I mean, you go a little crazy from this total absolute wall of rejection." But Ruffalo kept working in his little plays. Twenty people in the audience, half of them friends. Casting directors would promise to come, then blow him off. He wrote; he directed. He says he isn't bitter. "Frankly, I probably wasn't very good at that time, so there was probably a reason I wasn't getting parts," he says. "I often think back to what would have happened if I had gotten all the things I wanted. I wouldn't be the actor I am today. I tell you, it was 10 years of acting before I began to have any sort of -- I don't know really -- interesting stuff going on in my work. It was only out of really difficult times that I grew the really deep roots I needed to be the actor I was hoping to become."

THE THING IN HIS HEAD

He never experienced headaches, blurred vision or problems with balance. There was a slight, almost imperceptible hearing loss in his left ear. He was newly married to the French actress Sunrise Coigney, and they had a baby, Keen. One night, "I dreamt I had a brain tumor, of all things. It was such a real dream, I followed up on it, and wham, bam, thank you, ma'am," he says. "I thought that was it for me."

The operation lasted 10 hours. He reacted badly to the anesthesia. Six months of recovery. He lost 40 pounds. Another 10 months before he worked again, in In the Cut.

"All these crazy things go into it when someone tinkers with your brain. What if they took away something important, that was talent? What if that was what made me special? I wasn't sure I still had it."

In many interviews now, he declines to talk about the brain tumor, saying he doesn't want to be seen as some kind of medical miracle. "But it is part of my life, you know? A big part," he says. "It focuses your attention and your intentions. It makes you aware of a lot more. The choices. The way you appreciate things."

It made him focus on what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. "If, you know, I survived and everything." Then the laugh again, heheheheh, and he exhales a long, drawn-out expletive.

STEADY WORK AT LAST

In the past few months, Ruffalo has appeared as Jennifer Garner's dreamy boyfriend in the frothy 13 Going on 30, the tech geek bouncing on the bed with Kirsten Dunst in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, the cop Fanning in Collateral, and now the cheating heart in We Don't Live Here Anymore. His performance in 13 was actually a challenge for him. "I usually play parts where I'm able to hide behind the character. I can disappear. But in that one, I was this nice, stable, normal, decent guy. And that was hard, man. I kept wondering, what do I do with my hands? Do I just keep them in my pockets?" We Don't Live Here Anymore is more of a Ruffalo movie. Took 25 years to get made. "The subject matter scared them," Ruffalo says. Originally, Dustin Hoffman was signed to play Ruffalo's part -- back in the 1970s. The movie is brutal. There are scenes that may remind some couples of their worst moments; but there is also something almost funny in the struggles of these mortals. "These humans are raked over the coals," Ruffalo says. "Can two people come back from such painful misdoings? This season of infidelity? I felt it was an honest and mature look at marriage in crisis, and everybody is afraid to make these movies nowadays. Everyone wants to be entertained, to make things easy." This was a chance to make a movie that is very much like the plays he spent his decade performing. "It's a script and it's acting. There's no tent pole, no set piece, no action sequence, no mystery, no suspense, and so I'm really proud of it as an acting piece. It had to be pitched just perfect. "What I like about it here are these people. The characters. The actors. They're on the line. They're vulnerable, out there, in the moment, no safety net. And what they really have to do is count on each other."

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Forgot to make a note on a needed correction in the article.  Ruffalo GAINED 40 pounds during his recovery from brain surgery, not the opposite.  It was a side effect of the steroids the doctors put him on.  Of course later, he had to lose the 40 pounds....

Kevin Cage of @spotlightsaga reviews... GLOW (S01E04) The Dusty Spur Airdate: June 23, 2017 Ratings: @netflix original Score: 8.75/10 **********SPOILERS BELOW********** 'The Dusty Spur' is only the 4th episode out of 10 in S1... That's really not a whole lot of screen time for such a big cast of 'larger than life' personalities. I saw Kenny Herzog of 'Vulture' (that's right I call out names. This is GLOW, bitch. Step into the ring!), get a bit restless in his review of the episode. Kenny is calling for a bit more action, but I believe GLOW is exactly where it needs to be, doing exactly what it needs to be doing... Really exploring origin stories and holding up a magnifying lens to its characters in a careful and steady manner. Any true fan of wrestling knows that it's all about the build and you simply don't have wrestling without well rounded characters... And you don't have well rounded characters unless you give them as many dimensions as possible, not worthwhile characters anyway. Truly, these characters in GLOW are so electric, they're literally sparking with depth. I want to see GLOW explore that depth, because once we get to the main events, that's the only way it's ever really going to take it to the next level and really put the show over with fans. I remember JBL recalling a match he had with the late, GREAT Eddie Guerrero on a podcast a few years back. I can't quote him verbatim but he broke down the psychology and and anticipation needed to truly make 5-Star matches. At the time JBL was no rookie, but the main event scene on such a grand platform is obviously one that can easily rattle one's nerves. Eddie had some wise words and tidbits of much needed inspiring motivation at the time. He literally told JBL that they would tease the crowd a bit, give them a slow back and forth, go into a headlock and hold it for an unnecessarily long time. Basically, bore them to death. Now, GLOW is anything but boring, but surely Creator Liz Flahive & 'The Dusty Spur' writer, Sascha Rothschild, took a page out of Eddie's book. The crowd will never genuinely connect in the truly engrossing and all-encompassing way that it needs to if we don't know who these people are. There is no need to rush... It's not about the finish line or immediate gratification, it's about building anticipation with the audience so that the show resonates with them long after S1 is over... Just like Eddie Guerrero's grandiose, emotionally charged matches. I doubt there is fan out there that can recall an important match of Eddie's that doesn't have a few points that they can still remember like it was yesterday, making the hairs on the back of their neck stand up as they tell it... Not just triggering nostalgia, but triggering greatness. That's what Netflix's GLOW team is creating here, something that will stick with us forever... Leave us pissed off we have to wait a whole year between seasons. That's how you do it! To be fair to Kenny, he wasn't bashing the show, quite the opposite really. Although he does go on to say that 'The show is sacrificing a bit of humor for authenticity'. See, now they just can't win... As if I recall Vulture saying the very opposite about OITNB. Both of these comments just struck me the wrong way. I know everyone is eager for these women to get in the ring, but we got a little ways to go. I doubt anyone will have to wait to much longer as the experiment has to begin sooner than later. None of these women who the creative team of GLOW are reimagining in their brilliant dramatization have a story like WWE's Sami Zayn. They didn't tour almost 15 years working their asses off in the Indies, then hit a performance training center and introductory WWE promotion like NXT for three years, and then finally and triumphantly make it to the main stage. No, no... They were pushed right into the fire, but that doesn't mean we still don't need to get these episodes where we truly get to know these women. Just like in OITNB, GLOW does a fantastic job of juggling many different character arcs, subplots, and focused character work, all while moving the core narrative at a respectable speed. We got a flash of the exact vision that Sam (Marc Maron) has for his big main event. Obviously, Debbie (Betty Gilpin) is already there... She may have her own drama, but she knows who she is and can naturally step into any part she's given anyway. It's Ruth who is still struggling with her 'would-be' personas. She comes up with a few ideas and pitches them to Sam but she's shot down. Sam even goes as far as to suggest that her gimmick's fate isn't even necessarily in her own hands... And can you blame him? Obviously there's something inside Ruth that's worth tapping into, but it feels like no one, especially Ruth, knows where to even start. Maybe Sheila the She Wolf (Gayle Rankin) can give Ruth a helping paw. Their pairing is so odd, but the fact that these two have ended up in the same room together makes for both great comedy and one of the most awkwardly dramatic scenes in the entire episode. Sheila has big issues with sharing living space with another human being... No, this isn't because Sheila identifies as a wolf, it's much deeper than that. Clearly, Sheila has worked hard to not only accurately express how she feels on the inside, but to keep any possible vulnerability that may open her up for ridicule swept under the rug. Ruth acknowledging that Sheila was sleeping with a wig on was probably the straw that broke the camels back, but as we've mentioned before... Ruth may not know who she is quite yet, but her passion and aspirations help define her while she embarks on her own existential quest. It's a bit like Ruth is a cockroach... It's going to take more than a couple of traps and putting roadkill in her bed to get rid of her. Ruth is just about awkward in everything she does, and that includes opening to Sheila and attempting to find common ground. I loved that Ruth was absolutely terrible at doing so, but just the fact that she was making an effort was met with respect from Sheila. These women are all making the most of their scenes and I hope that this becomes a huge launching pad for talented women like Rankin who have never been given this type of platform before. Another big shout out to our girl Tammé (Kia Stevens aka Awesome Kong/Kharma). Everything she's been handed in this series so far has been elevated to another level by her clear vision of her character and obvious professionalism. I think a lot of people are ready to easily dismiss wrestlers as jokes when it comes to the acting world but we continue to see many who have not just succeeded, but exploded into both 'Main Stream Blockbusters' & respected dives into nuanced character work. Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson immediately comes to mind. Sure he can carry a big film, but look at the incredible depth he provides his Spencer character on HBO's 'Ballers'. I honestly believe that Kia Stevens has what it takes to not just create a splash in Hollywood, but to inspire real, honest to God respect from fans, critics, and her fellow peers in the industry alike. Tammé is having some issues with her 'Welfare Queen' persona. It's an obvious insulting stereotype when looked at through a certain lens. She's literally wrestling with the fact that she's worked hard in life to give her children a chance to be greater than any stereotype society associates with people of color, especially in the 80s. But with the help of Cherry's husband, Keith (Bashir Salahuddin), and his very simple remark that he finds Marc 'to be more sexist than racist' paired with watching an old shlock film of Marc's that has an oddly timed video dating cut right near the end of the film, Tammé appears to be coming to terms with the character. She's learning how to separate pointless stereotypes with the benefits of 'kitsch' and championing irony in the stereotype's context... And in pro-wrestling, both men's and women's wrestling, that's something that's extremely important. It would be disrespectful for me to end this review without noting that our man, former WWE Superstar Brodus Clay aka TNA hired gun Tyrus (George Murdoch) makes an appearance as Carmen's sympathetic brother who appears at their training camp with their legendary wrestling father, Goliath Jackson (Winston James Francis). They are there strictly to retrieve Carmen after they quickly realize that the giant pile of pillows and shoes in Carmen's old bed are not actually Carmen. Goliath and Carmen's two brothers are primarily used as a reminder to the audience that no one, not even the parent and member of a wrestling dynasty family, believes that these women will be taken seriously on any level. Carmen is one of those characters on GLOW that I tend to perk up for. Her lovable giant and adorable 'Machu Picchu' persona aren't exactly cutting edge material here (not quite yet, anyway), but actress Britney Young is proving that she can hang with best of them. Her scenes with her new roomie Rhonda aka Brittanica (real life singer-songwriter Kate Nash) give off a bit of 'explorative' vibe, possibly lesbian or it could be as simple as the differences in body image as Carmen is so quick to point out. Whatever direction they go with these two is ok with me, the pairing up of all the characters in the hotel is doing nothing but helping the spotlight shine on each and every character just a little bit more... And trust me, to all those pining for action, you'll appreciate all this character work they're doing now when these women finally step in the ring and start doing what they all came here to do... Wrestle!