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#and I mean directly clowning on you
flowerslut · 1 year
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I love seeing people use the locked tomb tags as a place to declare a moral stance on bad shit like abuse/incest/various upsetting things. bestie, this is the locked tomb. you’re in the Various Upsetting Things fandom. you’ve read the books. “if you ship campal you’re disgusting” baby these kids play with corpses like legos and regularly sweat blood “we HAVE to talk about ianthe and corona’s terrible relationship” yeah let’s talk about how their codependency rocks and I think they should get grosser and weirder and worse “stop shipping pyrrha with the younger characters“ baby she fucked a corpse. I hope pyrrha puts her dick in literally everyone. grow up
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beaft · 3 months
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I made astarion be the audience volunteer at the clown show because I thought it would be funny but then the clown just. Murdered him. he got murdered by a clown and it was objectively my fault. How do we move past this
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tequiilasunriise · 6 months
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When Steph and Cass get married they don’t take the last name Brown (Daddy Issues™️) or Cain (Daddy Issues Prime™️) or even Wayne (Steph absolutely REFUSES to become a Wayne nosirree), but a secret fourth thing (Gordan).
#BARBRA GORDON IS CASS’ MAMA AND TO AN EXTEND STEPH’S TOO OKAY#yes Steph still has Crystal but yall can NOT tell me she didnt lowkey look up to Babs as a secondary mom figure#the only one who is in on the jig is Kate bc shes officating the whole thing bc DUH and the way she fucken WHEEZZEEDDD when Steph explained#the way Kate would stand at the podium and anounce with such a smug grin#looking DIRECTLY at Bruce#‘I pronounce you…. MRS STEPHANIE AND MRS CASSANDRA GORDAN!’#the sheer fucken UPROARRRR#Steph LAUNCHES herself into Cass’ arms and kisses her senselessly as her now wife effortlessly carries her in a bridal carry#babs takes a second to process before instantly losing her NIND bc oh these crazy kids did NOT no no shes not crying#(she is. she so is. her date Dinah is handing her a hankerchief)#the batbros minus dami are hollering and cheering bc YEAHHHH STICK TO THE MANNNN#dami himself is dismissive and muttering about how could anyone throw away the wayne name like this#(on the inside he actually thinks this is pretty funny and must admit Barbra’s last name is a worthy rival to the Wayne name)#Bruce. Bruce is stunned. shell shocked. this girldad just lost his fav kid his princess#Jim is just having a damn good time bro is clapping Bruce on the back and having a good laugh over it all#also does this mean he has two honorary grandkids? no? well suck it bruce theyre my grandkids now#the other gothmanites who were invited like the birds of pret or the gotham city sirens are also all clowning on Brucie Boy#dc#stephcass#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#batfam
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vicsagesux69 · 7 months
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Malice Do'urden cringe fail zin-carla reference spotted
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All you did was ask if the weirdo was Neil Gaiman, then provided a call out. You didn't tell that LITERAL CHILD not to put themself in danger. Because that's what it is. When one person WAS concerned about a literal child contacting a potential predator, you made it about pro-shipping, not the issue at hand. You also called the concerned person deranged. You're more concerned with pixels kissing on the internet than you are a child PUTTING THEMSELF IN A SITUATION WHERE THEY COULD BE RAPED/KILLED/KIDNAPPED/OTHERWISE HARMED. That kid is doing things that have gotten other children murdered and tortured in a way they will never recover from. NEVER. If a CHILD tells you that they contacted a dangerous adult and you're an adult, you are morally bound to tell that kid not to do that. It's the same thing as a kid running headlong into traffic. Luckily, the person emailed (hopefully) killed the conversation quickly. Predators are master manipulators and kids don't know when they're being played. That could have gone very, very, VERY wrong. Shame on you for not condemning that action. You're the adult in that situation - you need to fucking BE RESPONSIBLE.
Fellas, if you send an E-Mail to a YA author and you’re in high school, is it inviting Murder Most Foul?
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sovamurka · 2 months
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Margenia, my beloved <3
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psalmsofpsychosis · 2 months
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after my ✨️third✨️ attempt in the past 4 days to expose myself to standup comedy and build my lukewarm-jokes survival muscles i'll hereby conclude that jesus christ i'd rather fucking die
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katyspersonal · 7 months
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^^^ I got this video recommended after watching a couple on UTDR dramas and it is honestly extremely spot on? I am impressed to hear a really thoughtful analysis from the "other side" of the situation, that addresses problems on both sides; creators being more worried about being shunned from the community than about what they did and damage-controlling what is said about them, but also strangers psychoanalyzing a person they don't know who is already irrational from fear and pain in bad faith.
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I am not sure if anyone here finds it handy since I am against the idea of "building up platform" for as long as I remember (I even had instances of purging my following to remain small artist), and I've made sure to cultivate the audience (all ten of my fans xd) with the same mindset who just want to quietly chill with the friendly faces in the corners 🤔 But I never know when one of those "platform and community" kids is looking in my general direction, so why not xD And yes, it is certainly helpful from the side of the observer, to not judge the creators the wrong way. The brain biology bit is hella correct, again, I am impressed by how well it is explained!
#internets#video#use later#youtube#clown world#people#I am against 'cancelling' to a sometimes extreme degree because yeah#like this youtuber correctly said the 'community' does appear to be a blood-hungry monster concerned more with-#-ruining someone than with actually fixing the problem#but in the end it is only a small portion of the community and most people are understanding#fear-mongering of the 'blood-hungry ones' can only do that much if creator genuinely picked themselves up#so yeah a lifehack: 1) step away from the internet until you are calmer and colder#2) come back and apologize genuinely without any regard to what happens with your reputation#again most people know how emotions and mistakes work even on instinctive level without any psychological education#but then the witch-hunters won't use your EXPECTED irrational reactions as 'proof' that you are a bad person#and yes for the love of god never search up your username and avoid reacting to and 'defying' the backlash as much as possible#both people that tried to drag me down I acknowledged directly exactly once and it was more to rant than to 'undo' anything#you both can not and SHOULD not#normal people will see who is the real one and who is malicious just as long as you're honest (like me lol)#defending free speech means defending people's right to talk shit about you unfortunately#I chose to only get involved when there is a legitimate harm towards me (like stalking+lying or hateful ableist propaganda)#Youtube
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larrythefloridaman · 2 years
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maybe J0hn for the character bingo? owo
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love this man ive been attached to him since he first showed up <3 dont have too much new i can think of to say about him though
#the 'literally me' one is only filled in because the discord kin-assigned me j0hn#and because i look at his issues with empathy and how he likes the company of unhinged people and go Same Hat#that said i still think its so funny that people in-universe seem to think he's nicer/more normal than larry#we warned him abt prism and what does he do? immediately seek her out. let her vent to him. and then left to talk shit abt her with us asap#hell outside the nccts he didnt even apologize for the sephiroth incident. he asked the guy he almost got killed to call his girlfriend#to sub in for the guy that tried to kill him. and then larry apologized on behalf of both of them the next episode.#larry's mean but hes nice and j0hn is nice but he's mean. you go to an appointment with them and larry's playfully antagonizing you#but then you leave and larry's like 'love that guy.' bc he was trying to make you laugh#and j0hn's like 'most annoying motherfucker.' because he was being professional and fast bc he was trying to get you to leave faster.#but i do think if we got to know whats going on in his head more directly#there'd be a bit of the phoenix wright effect. he's so nice. but if you heard his inner monologue#you'd hear every bitchy little comment he thinks about everyone every day that he just doesnt verbalize because he Chooses To Be Nice#until someone gives him good reason to be mean at which point the snippiness comes out see: orange intros#where crimson makes one (1) snide comment about his relationship and j0hn totally changes his tone with him#j0hn voice 'if anyone is mean about/to my clown the cyberbullying begins i dont care if you're god'#also larry has more of a self-preservation instinct than j0hn. larry gets a gun pointed at him and says 'hey HEY lets be reasonable here'#and j0hn says 'do it pussy you won't' and completely bluffs his way around it while making you feel like an idiot in the process#because he noticed you like. loaded the bullets wrong or some shit so the gun wont fucking work anyway#note: his kindness is real i just think his willingness and joy in being a lil mean sometimes is fun and interesting#larry abt peppermint: 'eh she not the most girl ive ever met'#j0hn: pitbull snarling sfx blasted through body speakers
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anonymouspuzzler · 10 months
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HAPPY UPDATE DAY!!! 🏠
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After all this time, all this hard work, I can finally tell you all more about my work on Welcome Home beyond "Dude Just Trust Me I Work On It I Swear" !!
I've been calling myself the "production manager" because a lot of what I've done has been in that realm - making checklists and spreadsheets, doing research, sending emails, and generally keeping our wonderful team on track to do the incredible things they do, with all the support they need! I'm very lucky and grateful to get to support Clown and all the incredible actors and artists we've brought on!!
that said, over the time I've been part of this project (I looked back and realized February 1st this year is when it all Officially Began, can you believe it), I've gotten to work on some more obvious, visible things you'll find on the site today as well! most prominently, I am very proud to say, I was the curator of the very real Welcome Home exhibition!! Clown was extremely generous and supportive in letting me bring his work into the world this way, and with their help it became bigger and better than I ever could have dreamed! Though this iteration was very small and private due to our venue, I hope the few of you I know who attended enjoyed it very much, and for the rest, know we hope to find ways to host the exhibition in other and more public venues in the future! (Where and when, I don't know, but I'll work hard to make it happen...!)
As part of the exhibition, I was able to create a lot of new props to help build the world of Welcome Home! Most excitingly, I was able to create a real working toy telephone, and help Clown to find our talented group of voice actors to provide the recordings! And of course, I was able to meet dear sweet Wally and Home themselves, who were the sweetest little peanuts and a true pair of professionals! Just delights to work with!!
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Though this was my most prominent contribution, somehow, that wasn't all! You will find bits and pieces of my art and writing all over the newest website update (some places more obvious than others...), and I was able to contribute to building many of the new and updated site pages as well! We've all worked so hard on everything you'll find there, so I hope you all enjoy the exciting new additions to the neighborhood!
My final little statement while I have my sweet little soapbox here... every last one of you who has provided support, even just one ko-fi tip, has Directly made this update Possible!! Not only do these tips allow us very literally to pay for supplies, art, voice work and the like, it very directly Supports and Improves the livelihoods of every single person involved!! so if you have the means, and would like to do so, please do consider tipping or subscribing to Clown and/or any of the other artists and actors involved!
And with all that... thank you, neighbors!! And Welcome Home!!
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cannedinternets · 2 months
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Yanno, a thing i see a LOT in fics is that the Batfam think Danny is a meta, b/c ghosts don't exist. Which is valid, i mean they ARE a team of detectives with a shitton of wacky themed rogues and, at least on batman's part, a noted distaste for and disbelief in magic and the supernatural.
But bruce and tim have both worked with ghosts directly. (Maybe the others too? fuck there's a LOT of comics and animated series and-) So i think it would be much funnier if they think he's not a ghost, b/c Ghosts Don't Work That Way.
In fact, b/c Communication Is Not The Batman's Strong Suit, I think it's funny if all of them are wrong but for different reasons.
Bruce - has worked with Deadman. You can't see or interact with ghosts without magical outside intervention. Thinks Danny is a magic user who transforms a la Shazam/Captain Marvel.
Dick - Clown trauma? Mind control Trauma? One of your rogues tried to brainwash you to be his son/weapon? Damn kid you're like me if i had it even worse. Thinks Danny is a "regular" kid vigilante with a schtick.
Babs - Well the video evidence she can find deffo lines up with him being a super, but there's a hardcore blackout around his town, he doesn't legally exist, AND any outside info she runs into is usually cutoff by someone (tucker or technus depending), AND he's mentioned cloning. So he's probably a designer "cloned" (ugh dc that's not how cloning works) meta kid that's being taken advantage of by the government and/or cadmus.
Cass - Thinks Danny is a terrible liar (true) who is counting on the refuge in audacity to keep people from realizing what he is (also true). Thinks he's someone who got themed meta powers in a lab accident and is playing up the ghost thing b/c he fights ghosts constantly.
Jason - Glowing green eyes? Ability to manifest green constructs that look like they're made of goo? Constant death jokes? Aww, this dude is just another me but he is also a meta/somehow got anime girl powers out of getting dunked in the lazarus pits.
Tim - worked with Secret. Ghosts can fly, shapeshift, go intangible, teleport, posses people. Thinks phantom is an actual ghost that is possessing/overshadowing Danny, possibly consensually? He's looking into it. Ironically, is the closest to the truth.
Steph - Hasn't seen Danny do anything that the other bats can't do, and HAS seen him work on an engineering project for 16 hours straight. Thinks Danny is something like the bats, either under-powered or completely non-powered and makes up for it with tech and mystique. Also thinks Danny is a great ally in gremlinship.
Duke - his Ghost Sight does NOT play well with ghosts, ironically. Thinks Danny is some sort of eldritch horror with a human guise. He seems cool tho, Duke isn't gonna judge someone based on looks even if they do give him migraines.
Damian - thinks that Danny is a Pit Demon and you are all insane.
Jarro - thinks Danny is a Green Martian. Also thinks Danny is awesome.
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phas3d · 4 months
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Celebrity Crush|| Slytherin Boys
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type :: fluff
tw/cw :: suggestive jokes (all)
contains :: draco malfoy, tom riddle, mattheo riddle, theodore nott, lorenzo berkshire
summary :: you're either friends or enemies and they see you freaking out over your celebrity, making them jealous. they search them up only to find out that the celebrity looks almost exactly like them
alternative :: your celebrity crush looks nothing like them
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DRACO (enemies)
Your group just watched the newest movie that came out
Ever since then, you couldn’t stop gushing about how hot the villain was
Although the villain was an awful person, you still went on rants about how fine he is
Your friends kept laughing at how out of pocket your jokes were
“I can fix him I swear, just give me a chance” you grieved as if someone died
"I'm gonna get on all fours and start hitting my chest like a gorilla if he keeps looking this fine" you said with passion, not scared of the whole school hearing you
Draco, despite not wanting to say it, was extremely jealous as he gripped his fork extra hard as he heard you
He was a dick, why didn’t you like him? Maybe he wasn’t hot enough? He’s always been slightly insecure about his appearance
The second lunch ended, he ran to the bathroom and secretly looked up the actor
But as he looked at him… he realized he wasn’t too far off from the actor
Their faces were almost completely different but, they both had short bright blonde hair, cold blue eyes, always wore green, and had similar body types
From seeing that, he smirked to himself and got an ego boost
He goes to sleep with a fat ass grin on his face
He won’t directly say the actor looks like him, but he’ll know it deep down
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TOM (friends)
Although Tom could stand being around you, he wished he could mute you out
You two were studying together in his room
Or… he was studying while you kept replaying the same edit of some random celebrity
“He could take my eggs and eat it like skittles”
Tom has literally killed and tortured people but he still widened his eyes slightly at your comment
He felt a small bit of jealousy, but he wasn’t sure if it was because he was scared of losing his only friend or because he liked you
(It’s because he likes you but he’s not that emotionally aware)
Tom has always been nosy, so he tilted slightly to see your phone
That’s when he saw a man with pale skin, brown eyes, and wavy brown hair
But beside those basic attributes, he also had the same nose as him along with a resting bitch face
He doesn’t show it, but on the inside he felt much calmer
It gave him a small sense of hope that maybe one day, he could actually be seen as attractive by someone
No one has ever confessed or even liked Tom romantically throughout his whole life due to his insane hobbies
He sleeps a little bit better with the thought that maybe someone could like him
And he really hopes it’s you :)
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MATTHEO (enemies) (I made this so long on accident... whoops)
You two clash constantly due to Mattheo’s class clown behavior and your goody-two-shoes attitude
He was always cracking mean jokes and bullying your friend group since you were kinda nerdy
You despised him and have beaten his ass multiple times (with magic) but he still doesn’t learn his lesson
But that's mainly because he thinks it's hot when you beat his ass and yell at him
Once again, he was walking towards your group to pick on you guys once more, especially you
But that’s when he heard you freak out over some random character
At first he thought it was just some lame anime character, that's how you usually are
But when you start showing your friends the photo-card in the back of your phone, he realizes it’s a real person
Instantly, he's pissed and jealous of a stupid piece of paper
He stalks you until you repeat the celebrities' name so he can google him and ruin his career
But once he looks up the idol, he sees that he also has dark curly hair with deep brown eyes
He actually researches and tries to learn about the idol more so he can take note on what you like
That's when he learns that the idol is known as a funny and protective person, just like him
He giggles to himself and decides to be insanely cocky
He prints out a photo of himself in the same pose as the idol, rounds the corners, and even puts his own signature on the back
The next day, he hands it to you and is smirking to himself
But... surprisingly... you didn't know it wasn't the idol????
You smiled widely and freak out, you thank him and quickly put it in the back of your phone case
From that, he smiles insanely widely. Not only at how cute you were from freaking out, but by also knowing he's on the back of your phone without you even knowing
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THEODORE (friends)
He's always known you were a fangirl but it was normally for weird things
You've had a few celebrity crushes over the years, but it's never been this extreme before
"GOD I WANNA LIVE IN HIS TOILET!!!" You shouted as you stared at a photo of the celebrity
Theo never understood how people got so attached but he was curious
How hot was this guy for you to like him THIS much? and why was he so jealous?
Theo has always been confident in his looks since he pulls bitches left and right
But, for some reason, he's suddenly strongly craving your validation
He asks you to show him the celebrity, only to see an almost exact clone of himself
Light fluffy brown hair, green eyes that were the same shape as his, thick brows, and a strong jaw
Theo smiles lightly and shakes his head, you perceived it as him making fun of your crush
You hide your phone from him and proceed to watch a pile of edits of this man on loop
Although he didn't get the hype of being a fangirl, he supported this one
He researches the celebrity during his free time and tries to become more like him slightly
Of course, he doesn't change anything drastically
But he might get the same shirt or shoes as him
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LORENZO (rivals?) (can you tell he's my favorite?)
You and Lorenzo were constantly at the top of your charms class within the entire school
Both of you have constantly gone head to head with each other just to compete for first place, only to tie for it together
There was no hatred or extreme feelings, just a fun rivalry that was oddly flirtatious at times
While you were in the library with a few friends studying, you suddenly start slamming your fist on the desk
Lorenzo was often in the library in order to check out new books to read in order to beat you
He looked over, worried that something bad happened
But all he saw was you on the floor, as if you melted, with your phone held high showcasing a man
He was curious as to how you got to the floor so fast despite banging on the table only 2 seconds ago, but he didn't care
Many people in the school shipped you and Lorenzo, but you both always denied it in order to not make it awkward
But, Lorenzo has liked you for ages. Despite that fact that he's a fuckboy, he would give up everything just to kiss you
"I would save his nail clippings and make a necklace out of it" You said in a harsh whisper that made all your friends hold back a laugh
Lorenzo was shocked, he's never seen you be so vulgar
He felt slightly hurt, not only by the fact that you were freaking out over some celebrity but also because he's never seen you act like this with him
"The things I would do for this man is un-ex-plain-a-ble" You aggressively whispered as you slammed your fist on the desk again
The librarian came around and told your whole group to shut up, which made Lorenzo happy
He decided to do his usual routine, he walked up to you and flicked you on the head as a joking gesture
You wince and hold your forehead, that's when he looks at your phone and sees the name of the celebrity
He repeats the name over and over and over and OVER in his head until he gets to his dorm and instantly searches him up on his phone
That's when he sees how similar he is to the celebrity
At first, he was doubting it since he didn't want to be cocky
But he told Theo and Theo instantly agreed, saying the celebrity looks just like him
Sharp jawline and cheekbones, fair skin, soft light brown hair, brown eyes, and even the same body build
He smiled to himself, feeling a bit of self love for himself from seeing how similar he is to your favorite celebrity
He's always been slightly insecure of his body build due to most of the guys in Hogwarts being buff as shit while Lorenzo was slightly more lean
But seeing the celebrity be called the heart-throb of the year made him really happy
After he knows all of this, he's much more confident around you and even finds subtle ways to bring up how he knows your type
Uses this as evidence against you to make you blush during petty arguments
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explicit-tae · 6 months
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Ungodly Hour: Day 3
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You’re feeling petty, so sending Jungkook nudes is how you get your revenge on him for leaving you.
Series Masterlist
Word Count: 3.212
Warning: jungkook getting clowned, face riding, oral sex, smut, simp jungkook, dirty talking, ass slapping, shit talking reader bs that's what she does, slight sexting
You ponder what life would be like if you lived with Jungkook - the weekend is long and waking up besides the man felt nice. He cooked breakfast after allowing you to sleep in, you two eating together. You’d shower, spend the day together (sex came randomly in between) and then go to bed.
Work was a task you’d dreaded, but you’d refuse to give up so quickly, even when Jungkook agreed to your joke of quitting, stating that you could always live off of him - an agreement the man was too quick to settle for.
Even after your boring, easy job, you acted as if it was the worst day of your life. Jungkook had bought takeout to make up for it and you were content for a while.
And now, you and Jungkook are in his bathroom, you attempting to concentrate on your task. You were dressed in nothing but a black silk robe - a gift from Jungkook - the both of you fresh out of the shower. He has a match one that he tied loosely around himself.
“Is it supposed to burn?” Jungkook asks, opening one eye to look at you. He sits on his closed toilet, you directly in front of him.
“If you ask me that one more time, Jungkook, I swear-”
“You want me to fuck you so bad, Y/N.” Jungkook closes his eyes, his hands reaching out for your waist to bring you close to him. 
You groan, squirming out of his reach. “We’re doing face masks.” you deadpan, your mind not comprehending how the man could be thinking about sex at a time like this. “Nothing about this is sexy, Kook.”
Jungkook scoffs - he begs to differ. There was never a moment Jungkook didn’t want you - but he was a man and maybe that was just the way his body reacts around you. He’d remain quiet, however, to make you any more irritated with him. Your irritation only fueled his sexual desire.
“‘Kay, done.” you lean back to admire your work on Jungkook’s face. Now the both of you matched - both sporting a cream colored face mask. “Our skins going to be so smooth when we’re done!” you squeal, and for a moment you’re excited - until you see the smile on Jungkook’s lips. “Ugh, didn’t mean to do that. Don’t think I like doing things like this with you.” you quickly scoff.
Jungkook cackles at your fraudulent change of tune. “You’re so down bad for me, Y/N.” Jungkook snatches your waist this time, bringing you closer to him. He then stands.  “Give it a few more months, baby, and you’ll finally admit it outside of sex.”
“Fuck off.” you murmur, hands pushing Jungkook back - even if you didn’t put that much force into it because you actually did like his embrace.
Jungkook brings his face closer, the need to kiss you heavy. He doesn’t get the chance to, however, a loud banging noise sounding throughout his home. His eyebrows furrow. “Someone’s at the door.” he says aloud. “Be right back.” 
You turn away from the man to clean up the mess you’ve made. As you turned on the water to clean the silicon brush, Jungkook takes it upon himself to slap your ass.
“Jung-” you swung around to snap, but Jungkook’s already out the door and down the hall, a loud trail of laughter echoing behind him.
Jungkook makes his way towards his front door, not caring about his appearance as he swings it open. 
“Oop, jump scare.” Jimin walks past him, shoving three large pizzas in his arms. “Why do you never answer your phone?”
Jungkook is dumbfounded as Hoseok and Taehyung steps in, as well, and for a moment he thinks about what he’s going to say.
However, Jungkook remembers that it’s Sunday - and Sunday’s were movie nights. He swallows the lump in his throat. 
He didn’t need Jimin knowing that you were here - not because Jimin hated you, it was quite the opposite. Jimin loved you (from afar) and your antics. He liked you and him together, stating that you made a good couple. 
Jimin knowing that you were here meant that Jungkook forgot about the weekly movie night - and then he’d have to hear Jimin’s mouth about how “pussy was worth more than the friendship” as he liked to put it.
“I was, uh, showering.” Jungkook responds, closing the door behind Hoseok. “Where’s Joon?” he questions, as if he wasn’t the one who lost track of his days. 
“Running late.” Jimin takes off his shoes and proceeds to go to the living room. “I wonder what’s new on the streaming services. Not like I’d know…” he trails off, side eyeing the younger male.
“You’ll have to get over that.” Hoseok snickers, taking his seat beside Jimin. “We all know Jungkook would find a girl that would take all his time.”
Jungkook laughs awkwardly, placing the boxes of pizza on the coffee table. 
“Ah, yes.” Taehyung sits on one of the leather chairs, a boxy smirk on his lips. “So…did Y/N teach you any new tricks?”
“Or is barking all you do?” Jimin scoffs, then proceeds to go out in full laughter, followed by Hoseok and Taehyung.
Jungkook rolls his eyes. It was bad enough he had to hear it in the groupchat. This was a moment they’ll never let him live down.
“I just want to be a fly on the wall.” Hoseok shakes his head. “Y/N has to be doing something lethal to have you bark-”
“It was a joke.” Jungkook hisses. “Pick a movie while I take this off.” he murmurs, making his way down the hall and back towards the bathroom. Jungkook opens the door and eyes you, face mask already off. “So, we have a dilemma.” he mumbles, coming towards the sink.
“I heard Jimin.” your arms are crossed. “Is he talking shit again?”
“It’s Jimin.” Jungkook scoffs. He begins to wipe the face mask off of his skin, scrubbing aggressively. “I forgot tonight was movie night.”
“Movie night?” you furrow your brows. “But I thought you said we were continuing Law & Order?”
Jungkook sighs. He turns off the water and turns towards you. “I did,” he admits. “but we have movie nights every Sunday and…” he trails off.
“And…” you shake your head, not comprehending. Jungkook grabs a small hand towel and wipes his face “...you’re saying fuck Lieutenant Olivia Benson? Because you want to watch a lame ass movie?” you cross your arms, even if you couldn’t be upset about it. You just wanted a reason to give him shit.
Jungkook licks his lips and smirks. “You’re so jealous, baby. I knew you’d-”
“Ew. Go watch your lame movie with your lame friends.” you push him away, fighting the smile stretching on your lips when you feel his hands on your wrist. “I’ll be in the room, I guess.”
Jungkook pokes his head out the bathroom door to assure no one was looking. Then, he drags you towards his room and shuts the door. “I’ll sneak you some pizza.” he murmurs. He rushes towards his closet to change into clothes.
“I…I can’t come out?” you scoff in disbelief. 
Jungkook shakes his head. “They’ve been cooking me in the groupchat and when they walked in. You walking out will only be my 13th reason.” Jungkook is dressed in under a minute, a black shirt and iron man pajama shorts. He comes towards you when he sees your wide eyed expression and wraps you in a sudden embrace, peppering your face with kisses. “I’ll let you sit on my face later.” he murmurs.
“You do that everyday.” you deadpan.
“Exactly.” Jungkook smiles. “So you’ll be okay for a few hours. I’ll try to kick them out after one movie, though.”
Again, Jungkook slaps your ass, but this time brings you in for a kiss. He’s out the door before you can say anything further. You eye his bedroom door for a moment and scoff with a shake of your head. 
“Hyung, when did you get here?” Jungkook asks when he strolls through the living room to see Namjoon. “Did you find a movie yet?”
“Got here a minute ago.” Namjoon responds.
“Haven’t been on here in so long. Forgot how to work the app.” Jimin retorts.
“Eventually you’re going to have to get over it.” Jungkook makes his way towards the kitchen to grab a plate. He then walks back towards the livingroom to gather a few slices of pizza for you. 
“Forget about the ultimate betrayal?” Jimin scoffs. “Never.”
“Where are you going?” Taehyung asks, eyeing Jungkook. 
“I’m just saving myself some pizza.” Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. “Might be hungry in the middle of the night.”
Taehyung doesn’t respond.
Jungkook makes his way down the hall and back towards his room. “Special delivery.” he scurries in to drop the plate on his bedside table. “I can’t  wait for you to sit on my face later.”
“Don’t think you getting any pussy after keeping me in this room.” you retort, not removing your eyes from the screen. 
Jungkook snorts. “We’ll see about that.” He doesn’t have time for a petty argument, because that would only turn it to him fucking you into the mattress - and now, he didn’t have time for that.
“Since when do you eat in your room?” Hoseok questions as Jungkook returns, a confused look on his face. “Since I got lazy.” Jungkook responds without a second thought, sitting next to Namjoon. “What are we watching?” Jungkook is barely able to focus on the movie. He eats a couple slices of pizza, his eyes watching the movie that his mind refuses to acknowledge. He would rather be with you watching Law & Order - he knows by now you two would be cuddling. You would rub your ass against him slightly, pretending to be occupied with the show and that would be his que to-
“You don’t look interested.”
Jungkook blinks a few times and then turns to Namjoon, the source of the voice. 
“Just thinking.” Jungkook shrugs. 
“About Y/N?”
Jungkook cracks his neck, only snorting. 
“Jimin told me you were whipped. Didn’t tell me you couldn’t go a day without thinking about her.” Namjoon teases, his dimples deepening when he smirks. 
“Are you two talking about Y/N?” Jimin crosses his arms. He’s laying against the arm of the couch, his eyes piercing at Jungkook. 
“I sense one sided beef.” Taehyung calls.
“Because of her,” Jimin starts, and Namjoon groans, having heard this rant time and time again. “I was removed from all the streaming services. Not just one - all.”
“I gave you several warnings.” Jungkook grumbles. 
Hoseok snickers. “Like what?”
“I told him when Y/N usually watches her shows.” Jungkook shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly. 
“You give her access to streaming services so she can watch True Crime.” Jimin deadpans, an unamused look on his face. “When you end up on one of those documentaries because she slipped something in your drink-”
Jungkook sighs, leaning back into the couch. “Can we watch the movie-”
“- and murdered you, Jungkook. I will be on there telling the audience that there was red flags.”
Jungkook’s phone vibrates in his lap. He unlocks it, your name popping up.
Y/N 🥰: does jimin want to fight me?
Jungkook smirks.
“When are you going to admit you like Y/N?” Jungkook asks as he responds to your text. 
“And while we’re on the topic,” Taehyung pauses the movie. “how did you get her mother’s number?”
You were only curious in the conversation outside the bedroom once you began to hear speaking. You never turn down an episode of Law & Order, and thankfully you had. You were told by Jungkook that Jimin liked you - his words now say otherwise.
You were growing bored. The pizza was already gone and Jungkook didn’t bring you anything to drink.
But the most important thing was that you were bored - and feeling petty. 
you: I miss you
You didn’t miss him - you were bored and that’s different.
You watch as Jungkook reads the text instantly and begins typing.
kookie 🍪: i miss you too 🥹😍😏
you: can’t tell
you: you’re shit talking me with your lame friends
kookie 🍪: never. I got jimin to admit that he likes you more than he admits 🤙🏻
kookie 🍪: are you hungry still?
You grunt. You couldn’t be petty with Jungkook if he was offering to feed you.
you: no
you: just bored…
You bite your lip as Jungkook types. You suddenly open the camera app and take a picture. It’s a simple picture, you smiling in the camera.
Jungkook swallows, his eyes zoning in on the picture of you. Your robe was opened slightly more and he has a peak at your breast. 
“If it wasn’t for me he’d still be in the friend zone probably leasing cars for her attention.” Jimin retorts at Taehyung. Hoseok laughs at the comment. 
kookie 🍪: you’re so beautiful ♥️
kookie 🍪: the robe is nice on you
kookie 🍪: i can buy you more if you’d like
You snicker at Jungkook’s response. The man didn’t know what to do now and his first option was to spend if it meant that you’d send him more pictures.
“I feel like I should be compensated for my hard work.” Jimin exclaims. “Who else can say they got Jungkook out of the friendzone?”
“They were fucking. Don’t think that’s just a friend zone.” Namjoon announces. “Raw at that.”
Y/N 😍: i seem to be the topic of conversation tonight
Y/N 😍: i wish you were as interested in me as your friends are 🤭
Jungkook glances up at his bickering friends for a moment before texting back.
kookie 🍪: im beginning to think i spoil you if you cant be without me for a few hours… 😌
You’re taken aback by the tone in the message. As if you needed him - you didn’t. You were just bored and feeling a little confrontational today. 
Besides, Jungkook wasn’t going to have the last word.
“I still want to be a fly on the wall.” Hoseok adds. “Whatever she’s doing that has Jungkook worshiping the ground she walks on needs to be studied.”
“That or you’re just a pervert.” Taehyung shrugs. 
Jungkook glances down at his phone and coughs. Eyes turn to him suddenly and Jungkook stands. “I-I’m not feeling…my stomach hurts.” he makes his way down the hall and goes to open his bedroom door.
You giggle when you hear the bedroom door twist.
You’ve locked it before sending Jungkook the picture. You were already naked, mind as well use it to your advantage.
kookie 🍪: oh
kookie: open the door
you: enjoy your movie night
You hear the door knob shuffle once more. 
kookie 🍪: open the door
kookie 🍪: stop ignoring me baby
kookie 🍪: i can always break the door down
kookie 🍪 : then they’ll know you’re here
kookie 🍪: and hoseok already wants to be a fly on the wall
kookie 🍪: and i have no intentions of stopping once i have you on my tongue
You flung the door open with wide eyes. “Are you-”
Jungkook pushes you inside, closing the door behind him. “Just sit on my face.” he grumbles, hands pushing you backwards.
It doesn’t take long for your robe to be discarded on the ground. He takes in your naked sight and sighs with a shake of his head. “So needy.” he murmurs, laying down on his bed. “You missed me, huh? And it hasn’t even been a full movie length.”
“Did not.” you reject, pussy already in his face.
Jungkook clenches both of your legs. “Is that why you’re already wet?” his tongue licks your clit and hums. “It’s okay to admit you missed me, baby.”
Jungkook doesn’t give you a chance to respond, he’s already diving head first into your. He suckles and slurps loudly, his hands keeping you in place. This time, he doesn’t care if you preferred him to now watch - he does anyways. His eyes are intense on watching you be pleasured by him - the cute needy moans, the fucked out look on your face. He wanted to experience it all.
“Your friends are gonna know you’re gone.” you whimper as Jungkook laps his tongue slowly between your folds. 
Jungkook leans back only slightly. “Do you want me to stop?” he questions.
You shake your head, and that’s all the convincing Jungkook needs. His right palm slapped your thigh. “Then I won’t. Now just ride my face until you cum.”
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his excessive need to make you cum.
However, you do as you’re told. Your hips buckle against his tongue, your head falling back - mainly to avoid Jungkook’s gaze. It was his favorite part, he once told you, to watch you cum. 
Jungkook’s tongue feels amazing - and it’s the same tongue. It shouldn’t feel better than the last time, but somehow it does. Maybe it’s the way his hands rub along your thighs as you ride along his tongue - or maybe it’s the way he grips your breast and pinch your nipples that are an added bonus. 
Jungkook’s hands never stayed in one spot. They’re soon cupping your ass to encourage you to grind against him harder - how he never suffocates is beyond you.
“O-Oh, fuck.” Jungkook hears you hiss and he squeezes your ass even harder. His own breathing increases as he watches you - he can do this for as long as you wanted. You were so beautiful when you were aroused and cumming - it’s a sight he has engraved in his mind.
“I know you’re about to cum.” Jungkook says muffledly. His head bops back and forth, in rhythm with your grinding. He also knows how you enjoy the way he touches you, your ass being your favorite part. He probably will never know why girls enjoyed pain mixed with pleasure, but he was nothing but a man made to pleasure you.
So, Jungkook slaps your ass encouragingly, making sure to give it a good grip after each slap.
You needed to know what it was about Jungkook - and his tongue, fingers or cock - that has you cumming so harshly on his tongue like he wants you to; and even then he refuses to stop until you’re twitching.
Jungkook doesn’t allow you to fall back like you want to, his hands grasp your twitching form and assures that you’re placed on the bed.
Licking his lips, Jungkook smirks. “My pretty girl.” he says, kissing your forehead. “I’m going to continue my movie night, okay? Then I’m going to come back here and you’re going to sit on my face again.”
You nod your head lazily, not having it in you to argue. 
“I knew you were so down bad for me, baby.” Jungkook teases. He places the blanket over your naked body. “One day, I won’t need to fuck it out of you for you to admit.”
“Fuck you.” you hiss when Jungkook is half-way out the door.
“Trust me. I will.” Jungkook chuckles, closing the door behind him, leaving you in a state of arousal and anticipation.
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his good dick, fingers, tongue and heart.
Series Masterlist
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@suciedad-divina @satisfied18 @y2k5bby @petalsofink @swga-ficrecs @rrrapmonste-rr @xtrataerrestrial @bangctans @danielle143 @taekritimin123 @thelilbutifulthings @jksjx @tasha-0795 @busanbby-jjk @joonlover1207 @hollowtree11 @amberpanda99 @parkinglot-nights @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @hoseokteardrop @jingerbreadoutofstock @subtaegguk
1K notes · View notes
choism · 9 months
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Jester's Game | b.tc
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Captain Buggy x Pirate!afab!Reader
Genre: smut, angst, fluff (If you squint)
Summary: Trying to overtake Captain Buggy's ship leaves you asking questions, and surprisingly, getting answers
Word Count: 2.7k
Warnings: top!buggy, afab!reader, unprotected sex (pls dont), cunnilingus, fingering, creampie, squirting, rough sex, gentle sex (yeah wild), inappropriate use of detached limbs, spit as lube (also a no no), overstimulation, pet names (sweetheart, princess)
A/N: WOOHOO ITS MY FIRST NON KPOP FIC!! I knew I would write for other stuff eventually but I definitely did not expect it to be a recent hyperfixation. Buggy just has me bricked up okay! Anyway I hope y'all enjoy, don't forget to let me know what you thought of the fic in the tags !
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It’s a rather unfortunate series of events, really. Sure, you could’ve told your navigator to sail away from the ship with the giant clown crossbones flag. Yeah, it might’ve helped if you had told your crew that they were about to fight some of the toughest pirates in the East Blue. But where’s the fun in that? As their captain, it’s your job to seek the adventure, and well, this was an adventure all right.
It started with you telling your men to approach, cannons firing, your crew hopping their ship, the infamous ship commandeered by none other Buggy The Clown. Yes, the ship your measly crew has decided to board. Listen, it was strategic! Buggy had somehow gotten the map to the grand line back, and your ship just so happened to be within the vicinity of his, so why not seek the opportunity to take it? Well that was your first mistake.
Now, you find yourself here, hands bound behind your back and kneeling with your crew in front of Buggy’s stupid, dumb throne in his stupid, dumb circus tent cabin.
“You all truly are fools for thinking you could take on my band of freaks,” Buggy lazily sprawls over his throne, seemingly unimpressed by your, in his words, ‘lackluster crew’.
“It’s funny actually, how pathetic it was, I mean even Mohji got in a few punches! Ha! Truly a fine show.” The man you assume being the Mohji that Buggy had just poked fun at, slumps his shoulders sadly at his jab. “Now, time to get to the good stuff…” Buggy trails off, standing up and taking a few strides in your direction, his dirty boots stopping directly in front of you. He detaches his hand and uses it to lift your head, pointing your chin up to look him in the eye.
Looking up, you spit and it lands on his cheek, he simply swipes it off with his attached, gloved hand. “So what if you defeated us, it doesn’t make you any better of a pirate, and doesn’t get you any closer to the One Piece.” You tilt your head and smirk. He may have overcome your crew, but he will never overcome your overwhelming ego and pride. It matches his just as equally.
“Ah, that's where you’re wrong, princess,” His grin is just as wide as yours, and briefly you’re confused, what could he mean? “Given your set of thieving skills, probably some of the best in the East Blue, I’ve heard, you’re gonna join my band of freaks, and I’m not giving you a choice sweetheart,” Buggy removes his hand from your chin, and it floats to his arm, re-attaching itself.
“Boys, throw their crew overboard, we have no use for them.” He rolls his eyes and sits back on his throne, “Oh! And go show them to their new quarters, make them feel at home.” Buggy laughs a deep boisterous laugh, one that genuinely sends shivers down your spine.
The pirates lead you into, what is actually, quite a nice room in the lower deck of the cabin, lit by a few candles, and a cot in the corner. Surprisingly, they cut you out of your ropes, and shut the door without locking it. What’s their deal? Don’t they know you can escape at any time if you wanted? Sneak out and steal one of their emergency boats, and sail to the nearest Island? Granted, you aren’t sure where the nearest Island is, you’re a thief, not a navigator.
Instead of worrying about escaping, you roam the small room, admiring your surroundings. The whole ship is clown themed, front he flags to the cabin to everything, but this room is different. Not a single sign of jester-like decorations anywhere. In fact, it’s as if this cabin was decorated specifically for you. Before you can think more of it, the door opens suddenly.
Buggy enters, and closes the door behind him. When he enters you’re sitting on the cot, legs crossed and unamused.
“Not thinking about escaping? Not that you could anyway, we are miles away from the nearest island, and realistically it would take you days to get there on one of our measly boats.” He rolls his eyes, as if annoyed by how small and fragile the boats are, before sitting backwards on the chair at the short desk next to the cot.
“So what do you even need a thief for? Why am I here?” You blurt, already growing impatient from the lack of information being given to you.
“I need you for many reasons, being a thief is only one of them, sweetheart.” Buggy grins and removes his hat, setting it on the desk. “You already have connections at the grand line, and while I know you need my map to get there, I know that you know the people I need to talk to, to gain safe entry without slaughtering half the fucking pirates there.” He leans back and relaxes a bit, observing your facial features.
“And why do you think any of the people I know would want to help you? You’re just some lowly pirate.” You spit at him, angered by his casualness. In what world would you even willingly help him? Who does he think he is?
“Ha…Me? A lowly pirate? This coming from the literal captain of a crew is hilarious! Tell me another joke, please.” He grins knowingly, he knows how to get a rise out of you for sure. You look over his facial expression, smugness overtakes his face and it makes your stomach twist, not with disgust though for some odd reason, with another feeling you don’t quite recognize. 
This whole situation has you feeling all kinds of anxious. How did you just happen to raid the ship of a pirate who just happened to need you for this specific thing, and why is his presence making you feel so…weird? Something isn’t right here, and it can’t be because of your connections to the grand line. No, he’s hiding something. 
“What are you hiding, clown? There’s something you aren’t telling me.”
His face drops, and he gets suddenly very serious, “Listen here, princess,” Buggy gets up from the chair and gets close to you, leaning down, your noses almost touching. “You’re gonna get me to the grand line, I don’t care if I have to torture it out of you, got it? No more questions tonight.” He gets up and suddenly grins very brightly, as if nothing ever happened. “Night night!” Buggy walks out and slams the door, then you hear a locking sound.
Fuck, he locked you in your room. You should’ve expected this, honestly. The way he reacted to your question was so strange. You knew there was something fishy, but you didn’t think whatever it was could’ve prompted that kind of reaction out of him. 
***
The next day you wake up to yelling outside of your cramped room. Yawning, you get up and put your ear to the door,
“I’m sorry Captain Buggy! I didn’t know that was their ship I swear I promise!”
You hear what sounds like a kick to the jaw and a yelp,
“Didn’t know? Didn’t know?! You couldn’t tell by the giant crossbones flag that very obviously bares their symbol? I’m tired of you, someone go throw him off the deck.”
You hear screams and pleads of “No please!” and “I didn’t know I’m sorry captain!” before hearing water splash, then silence, then- oh shit footsteps coming towards your room. You scramble back to your cot and lay down, pretending to sleep. You hear a couple of knocks before hearing a feint “What the fuck am I doing, I go where I want!” Before Buggy barges into the room after unlocking it.
“Get up, I know you heard everything.” He spits gruffly, sitting back in the chair again the same way as yesterday. You sit up abruptly. Last night you couldn’t shake this feeling, of what you felt when Buggy had gotten so serious, and it’s just gotten worse being in his presence. Your abdomen feels hot, your ears feel hot, everything feels hot. It’s like butterflies in your stomach if the butterflies were armed with knives.
“Yes, I did hear, what do you mean by my symbol? I thought bumping into you was a coincidence?” Buggy smiles faintly, and chuckles.
“Yes, it was, I wasn’t informed of what ship we attacked, just that my men captured you all, oh but when I saw you…I knew.” Buggy stands up and motions for you to do the same, getting so close to you, your chests almost touch. He brings his hand to your arm, caressing down the length before gripping your wrist harshly, causing you to wince. “Do you….” he trails off, “Do you really not remember me?” He brings his eyes from your arm to your face, making direct eye contact.
You struggle to find words, what does he mean, remember? Yeah, he gives you a strange feeling everytime you're near him, but you’ve never met this man in your entire life. You think. Honestly you can’t remember anything before the age of seventeen.
“I– no, no I don’t…”
His smile fades, and he lets go of you, “I thought you would remember once you saw me, we were on Gold Roger’s crew together years ago, but you went missing after a particularly tough battle.” He pauses, thinking carefully about what to say next, “You– We– We were close, and I was devastated, I thought you were dead.” He’s being surprisingly vulnerable right now, and it’s kind of scaring you.
“I don’t really remember anything before I turned seventeen, All I know is one day I woke up on an island, a group of pirates took me in, I left, and I’ve been on my own since. The only reason I am where I am today is because I wanted to find who I was, and I figured I could find that out at the grand line.” You feel overwhelmingly sad. Why are you sad? You don’t even know him.
There’s a long silence between the two of you, it’s uncomfortable, tight, and makes you want to leave, until he says, “Let me show you.” He says abruptly, and you think you see a blush across his face.
“Sorry, I mean, please,” Buggy steps into your space again, this time his eyes flit between your lips and your eyes, back to your lips. “I’m sorry we couldn’t find you, I’m sorry you had to go through that, I missed you so much y/n” That was the first time he’s said your name this entire time, but it’s not one you recognize.
“Is that my name?” Your lip quivers, he’s so close now, your lips are inches apart.
“Yes it is, y/n, sweetheart, princess, I’ll call you whatever you want, just let me show you.” The thick air has disappeared and is now replaced with tension. Something deeper, heavier, fills the room. But it’s not a bad thing.
“Let me show you who you were to me.”
You let his face drop to yours, and your lips finally connect.
The kiss is slow, languid. It’s like his lips were meant to connect with yours. Buggy wraps his arms around your waist. Pulling you in closer, and kissing you deeper. His tongue slips into your mouth, and you let him kiss you as deep as he wants. The pace quickens and he slots his leg in between yours, rubbing against your pants and providing much needed friction.
You moan into his touch and he walks the both of you backwards until the back of your knees reach the bed. He lowers you onto it and hovers above you, kissing you again before departing. “Is this okay?” Buggy asks, brushes his hands underneath the bottom of your shirt, slowly lifting it.
“Only if you return the favor.” He chuckles and lowers his head to your neck, sucking and biting gently while riding up your shirt until your chest is exposed. You sit up briefly to take off your shirt and as promised, he does the same. He isn’t overly ripped like most pirates are, but he’s still well toned. His muscles flex as he shifts lower, kissing down your chest, down your stomach and stopping just above the navel.
“When I saw you were the one my men captured, it took my breath away,” He lifts your hips so he can remove your pants and undergarments, “I was scared, anxious, I didn’t know what to do, so I pretended I knew you for your skills, not for your past.” After removing everything, he pushes back, kissing your thighs before sitting up, taking his gloves off with his teeth and throwing them to the side. Man that was hot.
Buggy detaches one of his hands and lets it roam up your torso, reaches your neck and gives it a gentle squeeze. Before leading his fingers over your mouth, asking for entry. You grant it and his index and middle finger slip into your mouth, swirling your saliva around and coating them generously. “When you suspected I knew more, I didn’t know what to do. When you boarded I just knew you by name, not face, there was no way I could’ve expected this.”
He removes his hand from your mouth and moves it down to your center, rubbing through your folds gently and inserting two fingers, scissoring you open and prepping you for what's to come. Buggy uses his still detached hand to remove his own trousers, his cock springing free from its confines. He strokes it slowly, clearly getting off to his detached hand fingering you open.
“Buggy…” You moan, you can’t even reply or form a sentence, the pleasure too good.
“Shhh just relax sweetheart, I’ll take care of you.” He brings his hand away from your now dripping cunt, reattaching it and leaning down. You feel his breathe over your core, he kisses your clit before taking it in his mouth, lapping up your taste and fucking you onto his tongue. You can feel your orgasm approaching quickly as he flits between sucking on your clit and tonguing inside of you, but he pulls away.
“Fuck! Why’d you–”
You’re interrupted by his cock entering you and your legs being lifted by his hands so he can enter as deep as possible. You don’t think you’ve ever felt so full before. His cock fits so nice and feels so good and he hasn’t even moved yet.
“Fuck you’re so tight and wet for me, so fucking good huh? Letting me fuck you like this.” His pupils are so blown out, he watches his own cock pull out and start to thrust into you, it just fuels your arousal further. Buggy starts out slow, just getting you used to his size before he picks up the pace, fucking into you even deeper and faster.
“Shit, gonna cum Buggy please.” He moves your legs to prop onto his shoulders and he grabs onto your waist, pushing down and holding you in place as he fucks into you roughly.
“Gonna cum for me? Go ahead sweetheart. Cum all over my cock.” He moves his hand over your abdomen and presses down, the pressure making you feel dizzy. You feel white hot, the band finally snapping as you come. “Fuck, gonna cum soon too, gonna fill you up so good.”
Buggy relentlessly fucks into your cunt, overstimulating you and causing a pressure to build that’s unfamiliar. “Wait Buggy I, fuck I feel weird it feels good.” Soon, with a loud cry you feel a wetness rush between your legs, causing you to let out a loud string of moans and curses.
“Squirting for me already? God you’re full of surprises. Shit, I’m coming.” A few more snaps of his hips and you feel his hot cum fill you up, as promised. It feels so good. He slows down and pulls out, his load leaking out of you and onto the sheets below. “So good for me.” He whispers, leaning down and kissing you gently. He cleans the both of you up quickly and gets dressed, ready to go back to his quarters for the night.
“Wait Buggy, before you go…” You trail off and he turns around, listening intently. “If you don’t mind, can you tell me more about my- about our, past? I need to know where I came from, what happened.” Buggy smiles gently, walking up and kissing you on the forehead.
“Of course princess, later”
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© Choism 2023. do not repost or translate.
2K notes · View notes
courtingchaos · 11 months
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Teeth
Eddie Munson x Fem Reader
Summary: You and Eddie are freaks. He has a little accident, you have a fun little hobby, and he shows you how he really feels about you’re whole Deal.
Warnings: Teeth. I mention them a lot. Blood, cursing, sex.
A/N: Did I start another blurb series before even publishing the series I was supposed to start last month? Shut the hell up oh my god why are you up my ass about it????
18+ NSFW No Minors
Eddie hooks his chin on your shoulder while you stare at the giant shadow box on the wall.
“Are they all human teeth?”
“Mhm.”
“Isn’t it illegal to own human remains in the US?”
“Well, remains and bones are different categories.”
He knew that would set you off, your phone pulled out for google to fill in your blanks. Eddie laughs at the first result, The Bone Room, and the two of you get a good chuckle out of it for a solid minute.
“Okay so I was wrong, but do you want to own a random set of teeth? What if they’re haunted?” Eddie watches your reflection in the glass front and can’t help but laugh when your eyes go big.
“One could only hope.” You whisper.
“Okay Morticia.” He leaves you to peruse the case of teeth while he wanders over to the weird clown doll corner. This was another little oddities shop you’d found online and asked to go to and he was more than happy to oblige. He also liked weird shit and there was usually a record store close to these kinds of places and of course you needed to find a coffee shop and it would always turn into a fun day date for the two of you.
When he finally gets away from the dolls he finds you at the main counter looking into the glass display while the clerk explains the jewelry inside.
“What’d you find?” He asks, bending directly in half to stare at the tray of rings in front of you.
“More teeth.” You give him an over the top smile that he returns, snapping his jaws at you while the poor woman behind the counter watches your flirting. She tells you prices instead of paying the two of you any mind and you hem and haw while Eddie just takes his wallet out to slide his card across the glass.
“Ed.” You don’t even look up at him when you warn him.
“Which one was it? Is it the big molar? It’s the big molar isn’t it?” He gives the clerk a scoff. “Can you believe this? I take her out here and she thinks I’m not buying her a tooth ring?”
In the cafe you’d found ahead of time you inspect your new ring while he chews on his straw, watching your rub the crown of the tooth.
“You really didn’t have to buy me this.” The barista comes over then with your coffee and a massive croissant. “Or that.”
“What? It’s a sweet treat for my sweet treat.” He tears a piece off and wiggles his eyebrows. “Also a sweet tooth for my sweet tooth.”
“Now you’re pushing it, Munson.”
“You love it.” He pauses when you kick his boot under the table and it turns into a violent round of footsie.
“Can I ask why teeth?”
“I don’t know. I just think they’re neat.” You shrug and fiddle with the ring on your middle finger. “They make a cool sound if you click a handful together. Very satisfying.”
“Yeah?” The smile is evident in his voice, even if you don’t look up to see it. “Sure there’s nothing else?” He goads, waiting for you to look up and narrow your eyes at him.
“And maybe I also want to crunch them like a sugar cube.” You make the exact face he thought you would and it makes him feel a warm coil of familiarity.
“There it is.”
“What?”
“I knew you wanted to do something weird with it.” His laugh turns into a cackle when you discreetly bring your hand up to click the ring against your front teeth.
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“Okay so if it’s loose like…No I mean I can see it moving in the socket…ugh god, yeah…alright…” Your tone doesn’t give Eddie any hope and when you scrunch your face up while the dentist office tells you something longwinded, he sighs.
“How much? Oh shi- yeah okay. Thank you though.” You hang up and shoot him a steady look. “Guess.”
“I’m gonna loose it?” Eddie says, bag of frozen green beans held against his cheek.
“No shit.” You set your phone down and make your way to him leaned back on the couch. “You could potentially keep it for a cool $600 though.” Your hand replaces his on the slowly thawing bag and the sharp intake of breath isn’t from the new pressure on his bruise.
“$600 for one tooth?”
“Mhm.”
“Fuck it, I’ll just pull it.” Eddie sighs at the ceiling and closes his eyes. He’d been fucking around, trying to swing his guitar around his shoulders during practice. Had actually managed a few turns but when you’d come to pick him up he wanted to show off. A fast toss over his shoulder and he didn’t see the corner of the body barreling for his cheek.
Your loud gasp and a lot of blood down his front later, he was in pain and slightly humiliated but definitely not out $600.
“Will you help me?” He gently rolls his head your direction, his cheek cradled between veggies and your palm.
“Of course.” You smile sadly at him. “It’s gonna hurt though.”
“Yeah but I like that.” He wiggles his eyebrows and you slap his chest, t-shirt still stained red.
“Come on, ladykiller.”
In the bathroom he braces his hands on the counter while you try to find the best angle to pull his tooth out at.
“I’m trying to not just have my whole fist in your mouth.”
“That’s hot.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“Yes ma’am.” Eddie grins at your flat look. You blindly grab the pliers from behind you on the vanity and take a deep breath before holding his mouth open.
“Please don’t bite down.”
“Eye hot yuh yiked hat.” He’s drooling around your hand and trying to be cute. It’s unfortunately working on you.
“Not like this, no.”
He feels the pliers on his tooth, a gentle tug while you rearrange and then you look at him. Eyebrows scrunched and a concerned look in your eyes. “You okay?” He nods. “This is gonna hurt baby, I’m sorry.”
He barely has time to process what you’ve said. He was waiting for a count down but instead you’ve yanked once, swiftly and without remorse. There’s a small clatter where his tooth bounces around in the sink and then he feels the pulse of pain. A new rush of blood floods his mouth and he doubles over the sink to spit and moan.
“You didn’t even warn me!”
“You would have bitched out and you know it.” You rub his back while he pouts and keeps spitting into the sink. When you disappear to get him a glass of water, he rinses out the sink and picks up his tooth to inspect it. “What tooth is this anyways?”
“The tech said she thinks it’s a premolar from what I told her.” You answer as you come back into the cramped bathroom. He pulls his lip back to stare at the dark space between teeth.
“You don’t already know which one it is?”
You just roll your eyes. “She did say it was good that you didn’t crack it, could have been worse.” You shrug and Eddie holds out his hand to you, tooth sitting in the middle of his palm.
“It looks cool.” He says, rolling it around until you pick it up gingerly and inspect it. There’s a little bit of blood stuck in the root but you keep turning it over, running the pad of your finger over the ridges.
“You’re gonna keep it right?”
“Duh.” He laughs. You hand it back to him and help him clean up from his traumatic afternoon.
A couple of aspirin and a hot shower later and he’s ready for bed, just waiting on you to finish in the bathroom. He watches your shadow under the door where light seeps out and runs his tongue for the umpteenth time through the new space in his teeth. He’s not trying to make it worse but it’s a foreign void that he can’t stop fucking with. The bathroom door opens and you’re already staring at him, head cocked to the side. “I can see you tonguing that spot from over here.”
“You’ve got a spot I can tongue.”
You don’t respond, just turn off the lights on your way into the bedroom where you climb over him on the bed. Before you can drop onto your side he grabs your thighs to hold you above him.
“Thanks for not laughing at me.”
“You looked pretty cool, right up until you smashed your mouth.” You brace your hands on his chest and lean in close. “The blood really distracted me.”
“Yeah that was quite a bit.”
“Still hot.”
He grins and you can spot the missing tooth in the dark before he pulls you in by your chin to give you a kiss. When he opens his mouth to deepen it, your tongue immediately finds the new space like his had. He laughs into the kiss and sits up on his elbows to be closer. It’s a slow make out session that he has no intention of taking further, mostly delighting in you running your tongue along the inside of his mouth, probing.
“What are you laughing at?” You ask, annoyed at him huffing into your mouth.
“You keep trying to feel it with your tongue.” He grins at you in the dark, features highlighted by the light seeping in through the curtains.
“It’s a new spot in your mouth for me to tongue.” You mumble and Eddie says something about tonguing your new hole and it devolves into a slap fight that ends with you two sleepily kissing again.
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For a few weeks his tooth kicks around the house in a little ring box you had laying around. Jokingly he stuffed a scrap of ribbon in it and called it a coffin, started giving a eulogy to it every night after dinner.
“Craig had the toughest job-“
“I thought he was Neville?”
“I changed it. Craig is a working man’s name.”
“In what country?”
“Coal country.” Eddie jokingly bangs his fist on the table and continues on about Craig and his 52 family members.
Wayne comes by for dinner and sees this little atrocity and just stares at it for a good while, you and Eddie tight lipped trying to not laugh at his blank expression.
“I don’t know what to expect when I come over here, ever.” He’s not judging, in fact he’s almost too accommodating when him and Eddie disappear after dinner for a smoke on the balcony and he gives his nephew pointers on what dremel bit to use so he doesn’t crack the tooth.
“A matching necklace? Christ Eddie don’t tell me you knocked out two teeth!”
“No! I bought the ring for her, this was just a mistake.” Eddie gestures at his mouth and Wayne chuckles at him.
“Always gotta show off.”
“For her? No shit. If I don’t, she’ll realize how much better she can do.”
Wayne tilts his head and fixes Eddie with a stern look. “You know how I feel about that.”
“I’m kidding.” He tries to wave him off.
“Well I’m not. Who else is gonna bring her home a tooth on a chain?” Eddie can see how that makes Wayne shudder, even when he’s trying to be forcefully reassuring. He pats his uncle on the knee before standing and stretching.
“True. There aren’t any many of my kind left.” He says it wistfully, staring off the balcony into the dark until Wayne huffs at him to get inside and help with the dishes.
The bit dies off and the ring box ends up on your nightstand. Eddie thinks it’s a pretty romantic gesture the way you’ve given it a prime spot next to your Dracula figure. He also knows you’ll notice it missing so he takes the tooth when he gets home before you and knocks the box over and when you notice he plays dumb.
“Oh no, did you knock it over?” “No I haven’t been in your nightstand.” “Why would I take it?”
He brings it with him to work and Wayne refuses to touch it, instead standing off to the side and letting Eddie drill the minuscule hole. He texts you on his lunch and tells you he’s got some extra stuff to take care of, running late, don’t worry about dinner. He uses the extra hour to run by the antique store and buy a chain and he gets so lucky because you’re in the shower when he finally comes home.
Ring box stolen from your drawer and left oh so carelessly in the middle of the counter next to your big water cup. He doesn’t even change out of his shop clothes, just sits and waits for you to come out.
When you do, you give him a kiss in passing and then stop short in the kitchen. “Eddie?”
“Hmm?”
“What’s this?” You hold up the small red box and gently shake it at him.
“I made you something in art class today.” He says bashfully and leans over the arm of the couch to dangle his arms while you laugh at him.
“Aw, did Mr. Munson help you with your finger painting?” You pout at him and he flips you off. Your laugh cuts off when you open the box to stare at the necklace.
“Is this your tooth?”
“Yeah, I lied.” He grins at you, “I staged the crime scene.”
“You scum.” Your giggle gets him off the couch, the scrunch of your face makes him cradle your jaw, your whispered ‘thank you’ earns you a kiss and before you can fumble with the chain he’s pulling it out of your hands to loop it around your neck. He does the clasp up and smooths a hand down over the tooth.
“Oh you make that look better than I ever did.” His dimples push through his warm smile. “Almost like it was made for you.”
“God you are laying it on thick today huh?”
“I mean it, everything I am is for you.” He holds you close while you fiddle with your new jewelry. It’s so small for such a significant thing, at least to you. Especially when he starts talking like that. Eddie notices your pensive turn and pulls his head back to look down at you.
“Did I…did I read this wrong? Is it too much?” He knows he’s bad at that sometimes. He knows you like this stuff but maybe wearing a familiar tooth is a step too far. Maybe it feels like a weight around your neck instead of a thin rope of silver. It’s his turn to get quiet and he tries to pull away but you latch on around his ribs.
“This is the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever given me and it’s really weird and I love it a lot.” You mumble into his chest where your cheek is pressed tight. “Thank you.”
He watches you the rest of the night playing with it. Twirling your fingers through the chain and rolling the tooth around, staring down at it and once tapping it against your own teeth like you did with the ring. It gives him a new affection for you, to see you admire something he not only made you, but something that’s wholly him.
Later when he’s waiting for you in bed while you wander around and look for your phone, the intrusive thought he’d been keeping in finally breaks the surf of his mind.
“I’d knock out all my teeth for you.” He says it into the quiet and you pause at the foot of the bed to tilt your head at him.
“That’s so sweet.” You giggle quietly, the look you give him is contemplative.
“No I’m serious.” He leans up on his elbow to look you square in the eyes. “I’d hang ‘em all on a silver chain, drape them on you like pearls.” His stare gets a weight to it that makes you feel rooted to the spot. “I’d make you an altar out of them. Give them to you like little offerings.”
“You make it sound like I’m a deity you need to please.”
“Oh but you are.” He rolls up off his elbow to crawl towards the end of the bed and kneel in front of you. “Everything I do is in service to you and your good favor.” He splays a hand over his bare chest and you know he’s doing a thing but his wide eyed eagerness on his knees is doing it for you.
“And you’d hand over your teeth just for that?”
“I’d hand over my life.” He grabs your hand and presses it over his heart. “I’d leave imprints of my teeth all over you and then hand them over on a platter.”
“Why is this so hot?” You mutter at him, your body flush with heat suddenly.
“I know, keep playing along.” He whispers back, eyebrows twitching upwards. “I’m simply a vessel for your happiness and if that means sacrificing pieces of myself,” his hands settle up behind your neck to pull you down for a kiss, “then I’ll pull them all out by the root and leave them on the steps of your temple.” He keeps pulling you back until you have to catch yourself and climb over him, his lanky frame unfolding under you.
“Does that make you a patron or a priest?” You straddle his hips and break away from the kiss to stare at him, necklace dangling down against his cheek.
“I’m your most devoted follower.” He whispers in the small space between you two, eyes searching. “I’ve pledged my life to you.” His fingers dig in to your bare thighs. “Not for just a reward in the afterlife but in the hopes that you’ll grant me one look at your divine form.”
“Eddie!” You laugh at him and sit up, face and neck hot from his praise.
“What? I mean it! All of that for one…touch.” He slides his palms around to grab your ass and you laugh harder.
“That’s all you want? Just a touch?”
“Well maybe a long, continuous one.” He tries to slide his hands up further but you stop him at your hips. He looks determined to feel up your sides but your grip on his wrists holds tight.
“You wouldn’t want to anger your god now, would you?” His eyes widen at your sudden boldness. When you can tell he’ll sit still you unhand him to pull up the hem of your shirt slowly. “You give me a lifetime of servitude for a single touch?” Before you pull it over your head you give him a wicked a grin. “I’ll reward you with your single wish.”
He understands the game but his hands still twitch when you toss your shirt to the side, chest bared to him. You wiggle around until you get your underwear off, his hands still attached to you. He gets one touch and he won’t waste it, not now that you’re fully naked over him. You pull his boxers down, hands grazing sensitive skin and he pushes his head back into the pillow with a groan.
He clenches his jaw when you grind down on him, sliding over the head of his cock. His eyes rolling when you lean back and brace yourself on his thighs. You gasp with every roll of your hips and he whimpers.
“God damnit can I please touch you?” He grinds out through clenched teeth. The wet slide of your cunt has him breathing shallow and fast, the urge to buck up and fuck you settling low in the base of his spine. “C’mon, don’t I get some kind of fu-uck…” He stutters when your nails drag over his thighs. “You gotta show me some k-kind of mercy.”
“I’m already wearing a piece of you Eddie.”
His chest rises and falls, nostrils flared while he breaths heavy against his own willpower. The tattoos on his arms jump when he digs his fingers into your hips harder, an anchor he has to keep in place until you tell him he can move. “Why don’t you show me just how devoted you are?”
His first instinct, his first want, is to push you back and hold you down and make you sob about it. He’d like to hitch your legs up over his hips and make you remember the feeling of him deep inside for a few days.
But that’s not how you treat a goddess.
He slides his hands up your back with care when he sits up, his lips pressing softly into the space between your breast. He kisses up and over the necklace, warmed by your skin under it. Kisses up your neck until he has to pull your head down to meet his lips again. His fingers don’t grasp like they did a moment ago. They dance light over your skin, along the edge of your hair. They trace up under your jaw and over your cheeks, down your nose. He follows their path with his mouth, gentle kisses following gentle touch.
Your hips don’t move as rapid as they were and he uses it to his advantage. He presses up until he hears that gasp when he breaches you, soft heat clenching around his cock almost enough to set him off. He basks in the moment too long and you try to move your hips down against his but he makes a sound of protest, something in the back of his throat like a whine. “Give me a second, I’m having a moment with divinity.”
Your laugh travels through you, vibrations under his palms when you test his resolve again. Another gentle roll and he lays his face into the crook of your neck to mouth at you. Tongue running flat up the tendon on display when your head tips back and he finally buries himself fully. Your fingers wind in his hair while he snakes a hand between you, thumb finding your clit and you both groan when your movements speed up. He’s already too close, got himself all wound up in the role play but he needs you to finish first to put a nice bow on this evening.
“Y’really like it?” He pants against you.
“Of c-course I do.”
“Y’gonna wear it every day?” You nod and whine when he puts more pressure on his thumb. “Let everyone know what kind of freak you are.” You keep nodding and grinding down on him and that line of heat licks up his spine fast. “Gonna show everyone aren’t you?” He can feel your thighs trembling around his hips, knees digging in on every downward movement. “C’mon baby, wanna see it.” It takes him a lot of effort to pull his head up to watch you. Your chin tilted up, mouth hung open and panting, all for him. He can feel the tension building in you and can see the crease between your brows. The low whine that crawls out of your throat and goes on and on when he finally hits your peak.
He huffs, almost laughing at the way you break, amazed as always at the way you react to him. You sit flush against him and grind and pull his hair and his eyes roll back in his head, a line of curses spilling out of his lips that you catch with your own. He comes fast and hot, the edges of his vision going spotty while you keep his head steady and swallow all his grunts. In his foggy thoughts he can feel you run your tongue over the new space in his mouth, the feeling just foreign enough that it makes him shiver before he laughs again at your interest.
It takes a moment for you both to come down, you slouching into Eddie and making him fall back against the pillows, still out of breath.
“So I take it I’ve won your favor.” He grins up at the ceiling, running his hand over your back.
“You keep calling me a god, you can have whatever you want.” You roll on your side and nuzzle up under his outstretched arm.
“Don’t teeth have something to do with prosperity?” He snaps his fingers behind your head. “With all these new adornments, we’re gonna be swimmin’ in it baby.”
“Oh so that’s why you worship me, for my money!” You poke his side hard enough he flinches and curls around you suddenly, locking you into a hug and pinning you down on the bed. His lips brush your ear when he speaks lowly to you. “I worship you because you deserve it, the prosperity is a perk.” He keeps you close for a while until you both get too hot, sticky skin separating under cool sheets. He still has to touch you though and his foot finds yours while he reaches over to play with your necklace.
“I’m glad you’re cool with this.”
“I’m glad you’re cool with this.” You laugh. “We could have been having a much different evening otherwise.”
(Sacrifice for the read more)
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genericpuff · 5 months
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All That Glitters is Not Feminism - An Analysis of LO's Brand of "Feminism" and What Remains of its Fanbase (The Twist)
Alright y'all, I've been waiting a hot minute to talk about this because I wanted to see how it fully panned out before saying anything about it. And it's not even specifically about LO, but I do think it's very adjacent to it in a way that I'm sure you'll be shocked to hear. Much of it speaks to how we prop up white writers even at the expense of POC.
This is 'the twist' attached to my first post that I made just a couple hours ago that concerns an entirely other topic but I feel ties into this subject very well.
If you haven't heard, there's this author who recently fucked around in the Del Rey publishing scene.
Her name is Cait Corrain.
In the original tweet calling this person out, names were not dropped, but it was made very clear that what Cait did was unacceptable behavior.
You can read the entire thread that started it all from Xiran here:
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There's also a GREAT recap thread from one of the affected authors, Bethany Baptiste:
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I want to make it clear that Cait Corrain isn't just a debut author.
Cait Corrain is - or now, was (foreshadowing is a literary device that-) - a debut author who had an agent, a publishing deal with Del Rey (an imprint of Random House which is a MAJOR publisher) and even an upcoming Illumicrate deal - meaning, her book was going to be packaged in a monthly loot crate subscription shipped directly to people's doors, quite possibly one of the best marketing deals a debut author could ever get, usually unheard of in this industry. All the pre-reviews were strong and positive.
Cait's book was literally set up for success. All she had to do was sit back, relax, and watch the fruits of her labors roll in. She had written the book. It was ready for release. The hard part was technically over.
But I guess the racism brainrot got to her because as it turns out, since April - for EIGHT MONTHS - she's been making alternate accounts on GoodReads to review bomb the indie and debut works of her friends and peers, most of whom were POC and did not have the same opportunities set up for them as she did. There are loads of receipts to back this up that you can find in those above threads ^^^
To say that this is appalling is an understatement. This was an intentional and deliberate act of racism by a white queer writer who claimed to be "jealous" - of what, I can't imagine - so much so that she deliberately sabotaged her peers, people who had supported her and her book.
And then when she got caught? She doubled down on it and claimed it was a "friend", also an alternate account she made up.
The exchange between her and this made-up person is actually the funniest shit out of this entire thing, it's so poorly written and as soon as people noticed the time stamps were out of order, that was when it truly cemented her newfound clown status.
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"oooooh he's standing right behind me, isn't he?" energy right here LMAO
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yes keep expositing cait, that's really selling the "this is a genuine conversation that really happened with a real person" bit 🤡
Anyways, it became abundantly clear that Cait was just going to continue to dig her heels in over something she caused.
This has been a hot topic in the UnpopularLO Discord, not just because of how crazy of a situation it is that we had to talk about it - and we have people within the community who work in the literature and media sector - but because we noticed one very telling thing in the list of series that she had review bombed in her very own personal act of wrath.
You see, Cait made one fundamental mistake that led to her undoing - she didn't just review bomb the works of her peers, she positively reviewed her own book and others.
What's her book about though?
It's an Ariadne x Dionysus retelling set in space.
It's literally another "modern retelling" of Greek myth.
And wouldn't you know it, guess who else created a modern retelling of Greek myth that she included in her positive review raiding while she was sabotaging the work of her actual peers?
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Now, I think it goes without saying that what I'm about to say should be taken with MOUNTAINS of salt, I'm sure a lot of you are reading the headline and going, "Ugh, really? You're gonna make this about LO? Could you give it a rest already???"
I need you to understand, with the current state of Rachel's fanbase and 'modern' Greek myth literature as a whole, at this point Lore Olympus - and the works that are literally inspired by it such as A Touch of Darkness - has basically become the shopping cart litmus test of basic decency. It's like when someone says they like Harry Potter - you can't take it automatically at good faith anymore, because there isn't a whole lot separating someone who simply liked Harry Potter as a kid and still rewatches the movies from time to time from someone who fully supports the politics and agenda of J.K. Rowling. No, not everyone who still watches the movies or reads the books fondly is a TERF by default, but it's justifiably a reason for suspicion when the consequences are often too dire to risk.
There's this thing that's been happening in the LO fanbase that I frankly saw coming, but has really recently started to hit its peak. It's what I call the "Kanye Effect", where the comic has become so absurd and backwards in its misogyny and white feminism that the only people who seem to be left supporting LO are the people who are legitimate white feminists and misogynists - because all the normal level-headed people fell off the comic ages ago (or transitioned into the critical side of the community).
I mentioned it in my last post, but it bears repeating - Rachel's fanbase has literally been shipping Hera, a victim of abuse, with her abuser, Kronos. I'm really hoping a lot of them realize how fucked up that is now that Hera herself has called it what it is - abuse - within the comic, but I also can't count on the LO fanbase picking up on that or even noticing it with how quickly people swipe through it each week, it's very apparent at this point that most of LO's readers don't know how to chew their food and don't pay attention when Persephone and Hades aren't onscreen.
But I'm digressing. Or am I? We're talking about Crown of Starlight after all. The debut Dionysus x Ariadne sci-fi/fantasy romance that was quite literally advertised using Lore Olympus as its baseline-
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This. This is what the ongoing cultural erasure and white feminist uwu-fication of Greek myth is doing to the literary zeitgeist surrounding Greek myth as a whole. This is why we criticize Lore Olympus and works like it that are created by disingenuous people who only seek to use the assets of Greek myth material as a way to shoot themselves up into fame and stardom. This is why we demand better standards in the literature and webcomic industry, so that people like Rachel and Cait can't use their privileges to quite literally erase the source material that they used to make themselves famous in the first place.
If anything, Cait's actions didn't just affect the people she negatively review bombed, or the people she was affiliated with, but also the people she positively reviewed. While I don't support what Rachel creates, she wasn't the only one who Cait went out of her way to review positively from her alt accounts, there were many others as evident in the Google Doc - but all this really does is tarnish the legitimacy of these books and their ratings by artificially jacking up their numbers that are advertised to others.
Making Greek myth fanfiction or fun creative retellings was never the problem, but it's now being sabotaged alongside so many other genres and mediums by toxic white individuals who can't even keep themselves from committing hate crimes, let alone create something purely for entertainment that's transparent in its illegitimacy, lest it destroy the illusion that these people are qualified to speak over those whose voices are being stifled, often by these very same people. Many of these writers get caught and are still allowed to continue what they're doing - that was certainly what we feared with Cait.
Until today.
It was revealed today that Cait's book will no longer be featured in the Illumicrate May 2024 box.
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Del Rey has dropped Crown of Starlight from their publishing schedule.
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Daphne Press will be hopefully following suit.
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And, most telling of all, Cait's own agent has severed ties with her.
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For anyone not familiar with the inner workings of the publishing industry, Cait has essentially been blacklisted. Without an agent or a publishing house, she'll have to entirely rely on her own resources through self-publishing. Unless she manages to sneak her way back in under an alias (which I wouldn't put it past her to try) she no longer has access to the mainstream publishing industry that was already guaranteed for her before she let her 'jealousy' get the better of her.
Her career was already made for her. She had a red carpet laid out for her debut. Her book was getting good pre-reviews and she had quite literally nothing keeping her from her success. The best thing she could have done was nothing. Somewhere in her head, she made up a threat that didn't exist, and sealed her fate in acting on it, a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I think in these situations such as with Cait Corrain, Rachel Smythe, and - also recently and relevant - James Somerton, we need to become increasingly aware of how white voices are still overpowering POC voices, not just in their actions, but in the opportunities they're given over others which they then use to further stifle the voices of those they feel "threatened" by or feel entitled to speak over. While neither James nor Rachel have used sock puppet accounts to "take out the competition" (at least as far as we know lmao) James did quite literally steal the words and voices of queer writers who were deserving of their time in the spotlight, and Rachel's work is being quoted as "rewriting Greek myth" as if its blatant gentrification and appropriation should be marketed as some sort of positive.
It's all too common for these deeply-rooted prejudices to rear their ugly heads and for the people who carry them to act out in this way while justifying it as "jealousy" or "a mistake". This isn't jealousy. This isn't a mistake. This isn't someone "starting drama". This is genuine, targeted hate, with the intention of snuffing out the voices of others who should be empowered, not silenced.
All that time and effort, and for what? Racism and petty jealousy? It just goes to show, it doesn't matter how many opportunities you're given, how high up on the ladder you already are - it won't fix the deeply-rooted insecurity and racial pettiness that spurs people on to do such horrible things.
I've spent enough of my time and words today talking about Cait, and James, and Rachel. So to end this off, I want to join in with all the others who have highlighted the books that were review-bombed by Cait, and help in uplifting them so they can have successful debuts. I'll be pre-ordering a few of them, so I'll be happy to make dedicated posts for them in the future after they release. Please consider purchasing them for yourself if you want some new reading material <3
The Poisons We Drink by Bethany Baptiste:
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So Let Them Burn by Kamilah Cole:
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To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods by Molly X Chang:
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Mistress of Lies by K.M. Enright
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Voyage of the Damned by Frances White:
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(I'm sure there are plenty others so if I missed any here, please let me know so I can add them here and check out their books!)
If there's any silver lining to this, I hope that it makes people aware of the media they consume and who it's being created by. I hope it makes people more willing to seek out the books that aren't getting the same opportunities as Cait Corrain and Rachel Smythe. I hope it's a wake-up call to the industry that matters like this need to be taken seriously and that POC writers are still being silenced under their own noses. And most of all, I hope it's a reminder that we shouldn't even need at this point that this behavior is not okay, no matter what level a person climbs to - that just because someone is part of one minority doesn't mean they're not capable of sabotaging another. It sucks that that has to be said, it sucks that despite these groups being so intersectional there are still people within them who submit to their deeply-rooted insecurities and find ways to feel threatened that they use to justify hateful behavior.
Having a platform is a privilege. It should never be weaponized against your own peers or those who you simply feel "threatened" by for no reason beyond your own imposter syndrome or doubts or internal struggles. Because as much as you may feel like you've earned where you are, that never gives you the right to weaponize your opportunities against others who were never given those same opportunities in the first place. "Feminism" is not using your power to crush "other women". "Progressiveness" is not exclusive to the progress that only benefits you.
I wish only the best to those who were affected by the actions of Cait Corrain. You deserve to be heard and seen and appreciated for the work you do and the abuse you've had to tolerate. I look forward to your debuts in 2024 <3
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