#also somebody give this boy a hug | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tommydarlings · 10 months

Text

Boys? Men! | t.w

pairing: dom!toto x sub!reader

warnings: smut, chocking, blindfolding, inappropriate usage of a tie, spitting, ruined orgasm

w/c: 3k

summary: Dating Toto Wolff right after you broke up with Mick Schumacher is something you can definitely argue about, but you just realised that older man do it way better, especially jealous old man that are rather possessive over what's their's.

check this out: my masterlist <3 // my ko-fi to support me! <3 // my PayPal to support me! <3 // my Patreon to become a member! (get access to +45 works) <3 // Save a Life carrd made by me! <3

Honestly, you didn’t even wanted to put that black little dress on and drive in that old timer Mercedes with your boyfriend toto to this 'super important' event that he had to attend.

But since you’re his lovely girlfriend, you’ve decided to join your hardworking boyfriend.

And you definitely didn’t regret your choice as soon as you saw Michael Schumacher’s golden retriever son, mick.

You and mick had a tiny bit of… history. You’ve met each other through formula one — since you are actually a pretty well known photographer in the industry — got pretty close friends, hooked up multiple times, kind of acted like you were a couple but never put an actual label on it and then decided that staying normal friends would be the best option.

And none of you cared about the fact that the two of you got some history… not until you started dating his boss — right before he joined Mercedes—, Toto Wolff.

Was it maybe a tiny bit bold? Yes. Did you care what others had to say about it? No, not one bit. You didn’t even think about it that much.

But what you definitely do think about is walking up to mick now and starting a harmless conversation with him, tilting your head to the side before you set your champagne glass down and leaned into Toto’s touch,

“I'm gonna be right back, darling.” You mumbled into his ear after he bend down to hear you better.

He briefly stopped taking with some random, old dude you’ve never seen before, putting his attention onto you now. “Where are you going, Schatzi?” He asked you, furrowing his brows.

You cleared your throat, “I-I’m just gonna have a quick chat with somebody.” You replied as you looked up at him.

Toto clenched his jaw before he quickly threw his gaze in the big room, eyes scanning the place before they landed on mick on the other side off the room, making his lips turn upwards into a very tiny smirk before he looked down at your figure again, “Alright honey.” Briefly bending down to give you a quick peck before he turned around again and continued his conversation.

You gulped before you made your way over to mick, squeezing through a few people before you finally reached him, smiling at him as soon as he noticed you.

“Y/n, hey!,” mick started as he went in for a big hug, “What are you doing here? Supporting your man?” You nodded at his question, briefly checking him in that neat black and white suit that he’s wearing out before you put your eyes onto his face again.

“Yep, gotta be supportive, right?” You chuckled, slowly making your way over to him and leaned your back against the wall right next to his taller figure, turning your head to look at him.

“You’re here alone?” You asked him curiously.

He sighed as he put his hands into the pockets of his black slacks, “Why would you care?”

His answer suprised you a bit. You knew that the break up was mutual but you also knew that in the end it was always mick how wanted an 'us' more that you did. You gulped again,

“I don’t, I’m just curious mick.”

He briefly shook his head, “Yeah, s-sorry,” he whispered.

You looked up at him, “it’s okay,” you answered.

You removed your gaze from mick and looked across the room to put your eyes on your tall boyfriend standing at the other side of the room, still chatting with that random guy.

Mick briefly grinned before he cleared his throat, “I mean, as long as you love him, everything’s good, right?” He turned to face you again, seeing your grin now, desperately trying to hold a giggle in.

Your ex tilted his head to the side, “what’s so funny?”

Then you just shook your head before you started singing your's and mick's favourite song that you’ve danced to a dozen of times when the two of you were still together.

“As long as you love me,” you suddenly started imitating the backstreet boys's iconic song.

Mick chuckled at your obviously awful attempt to sing the song, “Who you are,” he continued.

“Where you’re from.”

“As looooooong as you loooooooove meereeeeeee.” He dragged out the o's in a rather loud manner, making you lean into his side and laugh into his chest as his head fell on top of yours, both of you squeezing your eyes shut as you just unstoppably laughed at your extremely bad singing voices.

But then, as soon as you opened your eyes, you were only able to see your boyfriend, Toto, spitting daggers your way, tightly holding his champagne glass before you removed your body from mick's warmth again.

You gulped before you looked up at the blond man, “I’m gonna go back to toto again, was very nice to see you tho, mick!” You told him as you slowly made your way over to your visibly angry looking boyfriend.

He nodded and smiled at you, “yep, no problem! See you, y/n!” He kindly answered before you turned around and went to the boss of your ex boyfriend, eyes only staring at the floor.

Toto cleared his throat as soon as you stood in front of him, silently forcing you to look up at him. You briefly bit your lip before you raised your head and looked at him.

“And? How was your little chat with your dear ex boyfriend?” He asked you in a rather mad tone. You rolled your eyes at his tone, making him quickly get a hold of your upper arm, pulling you closer to his body.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me and answer my question,” Toto told you harshly, making you gulp before you spoke up,

“It was good, funny,” you answered, making him grin.

“That’s what I’ve already guessed since you leaned your body so close to his after he told you some stupid joke.” You were only able to bite your inner cheek at his jealous behaviour, desperately having to stop yourself from rolling your eyes again.

“He just told me a joke, what’s your damn problem here?” You asked him in a mad tone, making the men that stood behind him turn around and take a long look at you.

“You’ve got a problem as well, or what?” You asked one of the man that stared at you like you’re an alien, making toto quickly turn around and apologise before he squeezed your upper arm even tighter and pushed your towards the exit of the big building, swiftly opening the car door of his black Mercedes before he basically threw you in the passenger seat, shutting the door in a harsh motion before he got into the drivers seat, starting the engine.

“That hurt, Toto,” you quietly told him. Toto briefly grinned, “That won’t be the only thing that will hurt tonight,” he mumbled very quietly as you furrowed your brows and gulped at his words.

- - -

The air was definitely very thick between the two of you as you entered the big mansion that Toto let you live in ever since you started dating him.

You quickly went to work and removed your black high heels from your feet, putting them aside as you watched Toto’s gaze following every single move of yours while he removed his blazer and loosened his black tie a bit before he pulled it down, keeping it in his hand.

Just when you wanted to make your way upstairs into the bedroom, toto stretched his long arm out and stopped your moving body by your stomach, not even looking at you when he spoke up,

“Where do you think you’re going, little one… huh?” He asked you in a deep tone, hand now slowly gliding up to your throat, gently wrapping it around your soft skin.

You slightly furrowed your brows before you gulped, “Upstairs, to change,” you answered innocently, but Toto’s hand only tightened around your throat, swiftly pulling your visibly tinier figure in front of his taller one, forcing your to look up at him.

Toto grinned at your answer, looking down at you with a gaze that you already knew all to well, pure anger and jealousy.

“You’re going nowhere tonight, baby,” he whispered before he put his big palm onto the back of your neck and forced you to walk with him towards the other side of the room, harshly pressing your body against the wall, immediately burying his nose into the back of your head.

Your formed your hands into fists as his mouth hovered above your ear, warm breath hitting your sensitive skin now.

“I asked you to come to this gala with me just so I could show all of my colleagues and friends what for a pretty little thing I got myself here,” he mumbled quietly into your ear from behind, slowly unbuttoning his black slacks now,

“But instead they saw what a disrespectful little brat I got myself here,” he finished off while you felt him pushing your thong to the side, exposing your wet cunt.

You whined in a high pitched tone as he swiped his long fingers through your pussy after he spit on them to wet them. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as his hand was placed around your throat again, softly squeezing it as he watched your wet pussy, swallowing his finger as he shoved two of them into you.

You gasped as he started to thrust his fingers in and out, thumb caressing the side of your neck as he fucked you knuckles deep from behind, making your legs shake.

You leaned your head forward, forehead now pressed against the white wall, “F-Fuck, please t-toto,” you sniffled as tears formed in your eyes, orgasm already approaching you since you were already quite horny in the car,

“P-Please don’t stop…it f-feels so good, oh my g-god,” you whined in a high pitched tone before you heard toto chuckle at your words.

He briefly kissed the top of your head, “Tell me one logical reason why I should let you come right now, sweetheart,” he demanded in a rather kind tone, fingers only going faster by now.

You gasped as his movements got harder, legs already shaking, “I-I, please, I d-don’t know…but please!” You begged him loudly, not giving a damn if the neighbours hear you.

“You don’t know?” He asked you teasingly.

You shook your head, tears gliding down your heated cheeks, “N-No, I’m so s-sorry toto!” You whined pathetically, squeezing your eyes shut as his fingers suddenly slowed their movements down, making you gasp.

“N-No! P-please toto, I'm sorry-”

“Shut. Up., alright?” He tilted his head to the side as his finger left your begging cunt, legs still shaking from the now ruined orgasm.

With shaking legs you fell onto the hard wooden floor, palms balancing your now visibly weak figure while you sniffled, only noticing in the corner of your with tears filled eye how toto sighed before he bend down and brushed some of your hair out of your face.

Tie still clutched in his hand, Toto looked down into you eyes, slightly smirking as he saw how glassy they actually are.

Then, after calming down a tiny bit, toto stood up again, towering in front of your now kneeling figure as he let his black tie dangle in front of your face — smiling as your small grin fell, fresh tears covering your vision again.

“I don’t think that you deserve to see me, schatzi,” toto mumbled in quiet tone, slowly brushing your messy hair behind your ear before he leaned forward and put the tie around your head, covering your vision with the expansive piece of clothing.

You gasped as he glided his fingertips over your neck and down to your shoulder blades, thumb still drawing unknown figures on your heated skin as he spoke up,

“Get up.”

You gulped at his demanding tone but quickly got up and played with your fingers due the nervousness you were currently feeling. Toto got a hold of your waist then and guided you towards — what you’ve guessed — another room. And your guess was right as soon as he turned your body around, picked you up and placed you onto the cold surface of the kitchen counter.

You bit your lip as he spread your legs, quickly removing your bottom lip from in between your teeth again as you suddenly felt him kissing your stomach, making his way towards your begging pussy which was still extremely wet.

“You know, sweetheart,” Toto began as he kissed his way around your pussy lip but then going up your thighs again,

“I though you wanted someone who’s mature and earns a lot of money and is, well… visibly older than you because you just love being seen as the pretty little girl that got herself the rich old man, the CEO of the Mercedes formula one team, you know?” You only nodded and gulped as his lips got closer to your pussy.

“But then you leave my side and walk over to,” he made a brief pause to use his fingers to spread your pussy lips, fingertip of his pointer finger now gently touching your clit, “this immature, young, almost 'no-name' boy and laugh with him and touch him and stare at him like he’s the love of your life,” he told you quietly before he spit on your clit, letting his spit run down to your entrance.

His fingertips were only teasing your clit now even more, spreading the spit all over your clit and entrance, “that’s pretty pathetic if you ask me, baby,” he mumbled under his breath, fingertips now leaving your wet pussy before he blew some air on your clit, making your legs shake again and gasp.

You swallowed and sniffled at his feather light touches and breath that was hitting your clit at the moment, “O-Oh my god,” you whined loudly, “Please toto, I l-love you,” you gasped again as he leaned forward and gave your clit a peck, “I o-only love a-and want you, y-you know-”

“Do I? Do I really know that?” Fingertips only gently touching your big clit now, teasing it as tears made their way down your red cheeks, some falling down your temple, some landing in your open mouth.

He cleared his throat, “Because if I know that — like you claim I do — then you should know, that you should have never even started this conversation with your ex boyfriend, you know how much I hate seeing you with oth-,” he briefly stopped, tongue touching your clit now as he moaned at your taste, briefly spitting on it again before he ran the tip of his tongue all over your clit, “boy's, because they are no men yet.”

You whined in a high pitched tone as he closed his mouth around your clit, sucking on it and flicking it with the tip of his tongue, basically making you see stars while your tears of pleasure and slight pain were still covering your vision — and the black tie, of course.

Your hands gripped the side of the counter as he shook his head from side to side, tongue not leaving your drenching wet pussy for one single second, making entire body shake and fall slightly forward.

“Toto, c-can I-, fuck! O-Oh my g-god, can I p-please see you a-again, please!” You cried out while he didn’t stop eating your pussy like a starved man, groaning and moaning into it, sending strong vibrations through your begging cunt.

Toto briefly removed his head after sucking on your clit for a few seconds, spreading your legs even further apart, almost forcing your knees to touch your collarbone before he went back in to eat you out, slurping your juice up and lapping onto your clit like his life depends on it, quietly humming a low 'mhh, mhh' into your pussy, basically telling you 'no'.

Obviously, you whined as you heard his answer as a new orgasm approached you, tears already staining the black tie that’s still covering your vision. You gasped before your fingers left the kitchen counter and tangled themselves into his hair, slightly pulling his mouth more and more into your pussy.

He briefly looked up at you, flashing you a quick smirk before he started to flick your poor clit with his tongue at an almost unimaginable pace, making you cry out,

“Can I-I please cum, t-toto…please,” you begged in a high pitched tone as your legs started to shake again, fingers gripping his hair now even tighter as the tears only continued to run down your temple.

“I wanna c-cuuuuum,” you cried out as Toto’s movements got even sloppier, making it even harder for you to hold everything back.

He quickly squeezed your thigh to grab your attention since you're slowly falling into subspace, “Tell me you're mine and mine only and I let you cum,” he mumbled into your pussy before he shook his head from side to side again.

You screamed as you almost choked on your tears as he did that again but quickly focusing on your answer since you really needed to cum.

“I-I am yours, toto,” you took a deep breath before you continued, “I'm all y-yours, and yours o-only…I p-promise!” You almost screamed at the top of your lungs as you felt your entire body starting to shake.

Before you came all over his mouth, you saw him smiling like a proud boyfriend, slowly nodding at your answer, “Then you may cum, pretty girl,” he whispered right before he licked all of your cum up, spitting some of it onto your clit but also swallowing some of it, groaning as he did so.

He kissed his way up your things before he stood up and wiped his lips with the back of his hand, looking down at you.

You sniffled as you tried to calm your shaking legs down but nothing helped, as your boyfriend noticed that, he put his arms around you and put your head on his chest, stroking your head.

“Shh, it’s okay… I’ve got you, I always do, don’t it? I’m yours…just like you’re mine.” He told you in a bit of deeper tone, clearly implying the situation with mick. You looked up at him,

“I love you.”

“Oh baby, I love you too,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head.

#fanfic #fanfiction #f1 #toto wolff x reader #toto wolff smut #toto wolff #toto wolff mercedes #toto wolff fanfic #smut #f1 fic #f1 smut #f1 x you #Toto Wolff x fem!reader #Patreon

2K notes · View notes

positively-mine · 4 months

Text

Possessive om boys

how they show it and ideal situations (not nightbringer)

tags: gn!reader, slightly suggestive, a little red flag at Satan's & belphie's part, lmk if there's others!

A/n: I hope this isn't too messy but I literally can't think of anything else 😔 might do for the other characters as well.

Lucifer

Touching/ holding you somewhere on your body. Resting his hand on your nape, hands resting on your hips to pull you closer etc. He likes to use his thumb to gently brush your neck back and forth or he'll even use the blunt part of his nails to gently glide around your nape. You know, that tingly feeling. Biting when he's really angry or upset. Maybe you've been spending too much time with another demon and he can smell their scent on you. Bite. You're not focusing on him? Bite. The areas he likes to do it on include the shoulder area, neck and inside of your wrists (inside of your thighs as well).

Mammon

Similarly to Lucifer, but more aggressive. If you spend too much time with his brothers or other demons, expect something to happen. He likes to mark you by leaving his scent on you or big bites where everyone can see them. He'll be pouty or throwing random fits when he remembers it. But once you're both in the comfort of the house of lamentation and in your bed, he's head is under your shirt and on your stomach. Giving you small kisses all over it. And bites. Like so many tiny bites you'll have to ask him to stop.

Leviathan

Scenting, always attached to you and I have a personal HC that when he feels strong emotions or jealousy (obviously) he's tail will pop out. And the tip of his tail will either curl around your ankle, your whole leg or your wrists. If he's not too embarrassed to do it that is. Cuddling in his room means being wrapped and trapped under him for a longgg time. Like hibernation. But shorter and lots of gaming sessions in-between.

Satan

:) Big bites and confrontation. Or glaring. At the demon, not you. May or may not leave small little scratches on your arms, nothing painful though. He's a cute little kitty that frowns and stares daggers at the other demons if they take up too much of your time. So be careful or he'll scare away all your classmates. When he scents you, he likes you to be wrapped up in his arms or vice versa and reading on the couch together. Bonus points if he sees you asleep. He'll bookmark the page he's on and pull you tighter to him, basking in each other's presence.

Asmodeus

HEHEHE LIPSTICK STAINS EVERYWHERE!! He understands that it's inappropriate to go out looking like that but it doesn't stop him from leaving them secretly. If you have long hair, he likes to push it away from the back of your neck and leave them there. If you have short hair, he likes to leave them right under your earlobe. Don't know if this counts as well but matching accessories. Earrings, bracelets, necklaces, rings keychains, nail colour whatever he can get his hands on. Also biting your earlobe or your lips.

Beelzebub

I don't really see him as possessive but at times he can be hungry for all your love. No shame, so even if you're talking to somebody he'll hug you from behind or straight up turn you around and pull you into his chest. Holding hands is a big thing here. He's sacrificing his hand to hold yours which means one less hand to hold all his food. Cuddle sessions with him means his head is tucked into your neck and his arms and legs wrapping around your body. Can't say for long though because he gets hungry, but it's the thought that counts right.

Belphegor

Scenting, and lots of biting. He'll drag you to the attic and lay down with you until every part of you smells just like him. His legs will be tangled with yours under the sheets and he'll hold onto you tight. His is kinda general but is very possessive. Won't let go of you even if you need to pee. He's a little bratty boy that won't stop until you comfort him. Timing to pacify him varies from how upset he is. Also will put you to sleep if you still insist on leaving. Don't know if it's a red flag or not but I'll just leave this here...

teeth by @/mmadeinheavenn

barbed wire by @/benke1bear

reblogs appreciated!

936 notes · View notes

dizzyjelly · 1 year

Text

Kryptonite(18+)

Word Count: 4.2k

Summary: ellie hated everyone, except you. You go out to the bar one night and some guy bothers you, she punched his ass ofc. You get into a small fight but then you guys go back to her place and things get freaky;)

Cw: fighting, drinking, smut, strap-on sucking, strap-on sex, scissoring, rough sex, degrading, praising, spanking, the tiniest bit of overstimulation

A/n: ooh this is seriously dirtyyy! 😭 sorry if I missed any content warnings but I really think that's all. Also, I've been going back to my previous fics and rereading and I just now realize I misspell so much and like forget words, so I'm sorry for all my grammar fuck ups lmao

Ellie Williams was many things, but nice was not one of them. People usually tried to steer clear of her, knowing her mood was negative more often than not. But of course, there was the occasional time when somebody made the mistake of trying to be friendly with her. It typically ended with Ellie cursing them out, or insulting them somehow. And then you'd come around, always calming her down and putting a smile on her face.

Everybody found it odd, from the minute you'd been welcomed to Jackson, Ellie was always so sweet to you. It honestly had jaw dropping, everyone was shocked to say the least. On top of that, it made no sense. I mean, some random girl comes into town and she just happened to be Ellie Williams kryptonite? Absolutely zero sense.

Nobody dared to question it though, and anytime they did Ellie had a lot to say. The main point she'd give was that it was simply 'none of their fucking business', among other things. You, yourself, found it a bit odd. You'd heard stories about Ellie from various people around town, and it was hard to believe she could be so harsh and mean. Was she really as cruel as they'd said? You'd never know, because she was nothing but kind to you.

-------------------

After deciding to get ballsy on patrol, Ellie was sentenced to the unbearable punishment of laundry duty for a week. The only good part of it being that she got to see you, you had been a clothing designer before all this apocalypse shit happened so you knew a lot about clothing. This being the reason for your permanent work assignment staying laundry duty, you'd requested that it be permanent. Maria had no issue doing thst for you, and you were beyond thankful. You and no interest in getting yourself into any kind of danger, doing patrol or something else.

Currently, Ellie was trying to figure out what the hell she was supposed to do with the laundry detergent. She looked at the various bottles, grabbing then to read the instructions on the back. After a minute of trying to comprehend what she was meant to do, she let out a frustrated sigh before slamming the yellow bottle back in its place on the shelf.

"I could help you out, you know?" A brunette boy suggested with a sweet smile, he was younger and very clearly meant no harm.

"Fuck off" She scoffed harshly, "I don't need your help." Her tone was aggressive as she walked back over to the baskets of clothing.

She decided to sort them by color instead, that was something she was capable of. Five minutes or so passed and you came in, late. Very unusual for you, you were one of those people who was either early or on time. But late, you were never late. Ellie's face immediately lit up when she saw you, she smiled from ear to ear as she ran over to pull you in for a hug.

"Oh, hi" You laughed, wrapping your own arms around the girl, "somebody missed me." You joked.

"Shut up" She smirked at you, rolling her eyes, "why are you late? You're never late." She asked, a hint of worry in her tone.

"Um, I was just talking to Gavin, guess I got caught up." Your cheeks flushed red, Gavin was the guy you had a crush on for weeks now.

Ellie couldn't wrap her head around why, he was such a dick. Not that you'd be able to figure that out by the way he acted. He pretended to be a nice, caring guy. But he wasn't either of those things. And since he had you in a chokehold, for some unknown reason, you'd have to find that out the hard way. Ellie tried to tell you, relaying stories she'd heard from friends who'd been with him. But you were just lovesick.

"Oh, k." Her smile dropped now, and she spoke monotonly as she had no interest in why you were so busy talking with Gavin.

You furrowed your brows slightly at her sudden change in demeanor, but ultimately you ignored it. Smiling, you walked over to greet Samuel, the brunette boy who'd usually help you out with laundry.

"Good afternoon, Samuel! How are you today?" You asked, but he seemed kinda down.

He hadn't given you an answer, just shrugged, so you walked over to him and asked what was up. He motioned for you to lean in, so that he could whisper in your ear. Samuel told you about how Ellie had told him to 'fuck off.' And you let out a dramatic gasp.

"Ellie Williams! Did you tell my sweet bo Samuel to fuck off?" You asked sternly, hands on you hips as you made your way over to the girl.

She bit her lip, her cheeks flushed red as she knew she'd been caught.

"Maybe... I'm sorry!" She apologized with a frown, looking at you with pleading eyes.

"Do not talk to my sweet little helper that way, he's my friend." You scolded her just a bit more, and she nodded in understanding.

"Oh, hey could you help me with the detergent? I'm not really sure what to use." She asked you, pointing her thumb in the direction of the shelf filled with various laundry detergents.

"Yes, if you promise to be nicer to my dear friend Samuel." You raised your brows.

"Promise..." She smiled with a playful eye roll.

You proceeded to help her with the detergent, making sure she'd remember for next time. Ellie would continue her work duties, bored out of her mind as she prayed to be let back onto patrol early for good behavior. At a certain point in the day, she'd just be eyeing the clock, counting down the hours until she could finally be free from this torture. You, however, didn't mind the job one bit. It actually brought you joy, helped you to relax even. It reminded you of the days before.. everything.

Once it did fall time to clock out, Ellie was quick to rush out of the laundry area, waiting for you outside. You'd chuckle to yourself and shake your head, she was so dramatic. On your way out, you waved a goodbye to Samuel then smiled as you found Ellie leaning against the wall with her arms crossed.

"Hey, wanna go to the bar?" She asked with a cheeky smile.

You sighed through your nose, hesitant as Ellie was a terrible drunk.

"Fine. But Ellie, please don't get too drunk." You asked, taking her hands in your own.

"Ok... come on." She smiled as she held your hand and walked the two of you to the bar.

Once you got there, you took seats at the bar and Ellie ordered for the both of you. Alcohol wasn't really your thing, but she seemed to know her way around it pretty well. And you trusted her, which was a good choice because when you took a sip of your drink it was absolutely delicious. After another drink and the passing of some time, Gavin had made an appearance.

You saw him and a smile spread across your face, your eyes lit up and your knees felt weak. Ellie took notice to your mood change, following your eyes to see the man himself. She rolled her eyes and let out a small groan as she rested her head in her hand. You turned back around, sipping from your drink and trying to act cool. Then, Gavin had come to sit beside you.

"Hey Y/n, how you doing?" He greeted, the sound of his voice had you giggling.

"Hi, I'm good. How are you?" You asked in return, playing with your hair a bit.

"Oh I'm doing just great. Who's your friend?" He asked, gesturing to Ellie who was now on her third drink.

You sucked in a breath through clenched teeth.

"Oh, this is-" Ellie had cut you off.

"I'm Ellie." She answered him with a harsh tone.

"Well, nice to meet ya Ellie" Gavins voice trailed off as he looked at the door, "I've gotta go." He sent a little wave your way.

You waved back with furrowed brows, then frowned as he was meeting a girl who just walked in. She was pretty, long blonde hair and a striking figure. You sighed, dropping your head down on the bar with a groan. Ellie sighed.

"What's wrong?" She asked in a soft tone, bringing a hand to rub up and down your back soothingly.

"I'm a fucking idiot." Was all you muttered, not picking your head up until a minute later.

You turned around and honestly felt like you could cry when you saw the two of then dancing together, he had his hands on her waist and pulled her unbelievably closer. She laughed as her hands wrapped around the back of his neck. You turned back to look at Ellie, the pout on your face more evident than anything.

"Oh, come on, he's an asshole anyways" Ellie rolled her eyes, glancing over at the dancing pair, then she stood and reached out a hand, "come on baby, dance with me."

You smiled, placing your hand in hers and letting out a small laugh as she pulled you to stand with her. At first, you just held hands and bounced around to some faster songs. But then about two songs later, a slower song came on. Your cheeks flushed red and you took a step back, only for Ellie to snake a hand around your waist and pull you closer.

"Ellie.. what are you doing?" You whispered as she held your waist and pulled you in tight, so that you were practically hugging.

"Dancing." She whispered in return.

You giggled and brought your arms around her shoulders, leaning in so your head rested on one of them. Ellie smiled as her eyes fell shut, your perfume greeting her kindly. You sighed as you relaxed under her touch, nobody could make you feel the way she did. Her hands found their way to your lower back, rubbing small circles onto it. You'd nuzzle your face in her neck, smiling as you brought your hands to play with her hair.

"Fuck Y/n.." Ellie groaned under her breath.

You giggled, lifting your head to meet her eyes. She looked at you like you were the only girl in the world. You looked down at your feet, then back at her. Your breath hitched as your eyes couldn't seem to focus on hers anymore, but rather on her slightly chapped lips. She had to have noticed because a smirk slowly formed on her face. Before you'd do anything you would regret, you stepped back from her. The loss of her touch left you feeling empty, but you would ignore it and just smile as you excused yourself.

"I have to use the bathroom." You simply said, and she took a seat at the bar once again as you made your way to the restroom.

You didn't actually have to go, so instead you washed your hands underneath cold water. And you splashed some on your face for good measure, you'd been getting unbelievably hot during your dance with Ellie. Once you could no longer feel your heart beating in your ears, you left the bathroom to return to Ellie. Unfortunately, there had been someone waiting for you outside.

"Hey, you know you look really good tonight." Gavin spoke smugly as he leaned against the wall.

"Yeah? Thanks." You scoffed, "shouldn't you be getting back to your date?" You spoke matter of factly, trying to push past him.

Your efforts didn't get you much of anywhere, his hand now finding a tight grip on your forearm while the other went to hold your face. You rolled your eyes with a frustrated sigh.

"Ok, come on Gavin I'm really not in the mood." You spoke coldly, willing him to just take the hint and leave you alone.

He tsked, leaning down to whisper in your ear,

"Come on angel, just let me show you a good time." You shuddered at his words, disgusted.

That was your last straw and you found the energy to shove him off of you and into the wall with a hard thud. Then, you saw Ellie turning the corner, her fists balled at her sides as her brows knitted together with anger.

"The fucks going on here?" She asked gruffly.

"Ellie, it's nothing. I'm fine." You placed a hand on her chest, trying to convince her.

Of course it didn't work because the next thing you knew you were watching as she punched Gavin so hard he'd fallen over. Her knuckles were red, and his face began to bruise.

"Ellie!" You screamed as your hands went over your mouth in shock.

Before she could get any other hits in, you'd held her by her shoulders as you dragged her outside. She yelled at the poor guy the entire time. Sending a good amount of threats his way.

"What is wrong with you!" You shouted at the girl as the two of you now stood outside in the chilly night.

"Me? He deserved it and you know it!" She'd shouted back, gesturing with her hands, something she did often when she was angry.

"Yeah maybe, but still! You can't just go around punching every guy that bothers me, I can take care of myself you know?" Your hands were on your hips.

"Oh god, this again? I can't keep having this fucking conversation with you, Y/n!" She gritted her teeth.

"What conversation? The one where I have to constantly remind you that I'm a full grown adult, and I am entirely capable of taking care of and defening myself? I mean seriously Ellie, what's the problem? Do you think that I can't take care of myself?" You asked with a frustrated sigh.

"What, no! Of course I know you can, but I just- I care about you a lot and you shouldn't have to take care of yourself. It makes me feel good to defend you, I don't know why it just does. And I'm... sorry." Sge struggled to get the apology out.

"It's ok. Let's just go home, sleep it off." Your suggestion sounded good, but Ellie stopped you with a hand on your wrist.

"Wait." You looked at her with questioning eyes, wondering what else she had to say.

Turns out, she didn't have anything to say. Instead, she had brought one hand to your waist and the other to the back of your neck. She bit her lip, her eyes flickering between your own and your lips. After a minute or so had passed, she just couldn't resist. She pulled you in and connected her lips with yours, kissing you like it was the end of the world.

"Ellie~" You whined as you parted from the kiss for a moment, immediately diving back in.

This time, you pressed your tongue to her bottom lip. And she gladly let you in, opening her mouth wide so she could taste your tongue on hers. It was something from another world, you'd felt dizzy and giddy, and there was something else too. There was this heat between your legs, it almost hurt. You whimpered into her mouth at the unfamiliar feeling.

"What's wrong baby?" She asked, her forehead resting against yours.

"I don't know, 's all achy down there." You admitted, embarrassed as you'd only dare to stare down at her shoes.

Ellie let out a sinful chuckle,

"Well, I think I could help with that." She gave you one last kiss before taking you to her house.

You stood in her living room, your hand coming to scratch the back of your neck awkwardly as she rushed upstairs to grab 'a little something special' from her room. You'd wondered what she could be grabbing, but not for long as she returned swiftly without her bottoms now and a large black strap tightened around her hips. Your eyes widened at the sight of it, and you knew you wanted it inside of you. Your mouth watered at just the thought of her fucking your brains out.

She walked over to you with a smirk, pulling you in for yet another kiss. You smiled into it, letting out small moans here and there as the taste of her tongue felt so good against your own. You'd sighed as she pulled your top off, now placing kisses along your jaw and neck. It wasn't long before she was placing feather light kisses to the top of your boobs, then palming them roughly as she watched your face contort with pleasure.

"Get on your knees." She ordered after a minute, and you were quick to oblige.

Getting down on the floor, you looked up at Ellie with lustful eyes. She grabbed a fistful of your hair, taking a step closer to you as she held her strap in the other hand. You licked your lips before chewing slightly at your bottom one.

"Open that pretty little mouth of yours for me baby." She cooed, her hand tightening in your hair as you'd opened wide.

She chuckled as she pushed her cock into your mouth, watching with nothing but joy as she shoved it as far as it could go. You'd gagged, unable to help it, then you let out a small whimper which was muffled by her large cock. She groaned at this, tugging your hair a bit, which brought a lengthy moan from your lips.

"Fuck baby, look at you being a good little slut. Taking my cock down your throat so well. Good girl." The praise she'd given you had gotten you even wetter, if that was even possible.

Ellie would continue to move your head up and down for a bit longer until she was satisfied, carefully she removed her hand from your hair and let you pull back. Your lips left her cock with a satisfying pop sound and she smiled sinfully as she pulled you to stand. She brought a hand to your chin, wiping your saliva that had dripped down your chin while you were kept busy deep-throating her.

She'd snaked her hands around you now, gripping at your ass before giving it a harsh smack that made your body jolt with pleasure and excitement. Another kiss was brought to your lips by her, but not for long as you'd pulled away quickly.

"Ellie, please." You whimpered, she only let out a small chuckle.

"Please what? Use your words baby." She kept a finger under your chin.

"Please," another moan, "fuck me. Fuck me good and hard, please I need you." You were begging shamelessly now, and she loved it.

"Well, aren't you cute. Your wish is my command, princess." She smiled as she backed you up to the couch, lying down before pulling you on top of her.

You sat straddling her for a minute, she rubbed your thighs with her hands soothingly before ridding you of both your jeans and panties in just one motion. You bit your lip as she held your hips, lifting you so the head of her strap just grazed your dripping hole. She'd continue to tease you for what felt like ages, before you just couldn't take it anymore so you'd taken it upon yourself to lower down onto her cock. You threw your head back with a loud, pornagraphic moan as you felt the burning stretch inside of you.

Ellie scoffed,

"Did I say you could do that? Eager little slut, you're gonna regret that." She groaned as you continued making the sweetest sounds as she gripped your hips harder.

She'd waste no time, immediately thrusting into you roughly and at a fast pace that had your head spinning. Occasionally, she'd bring a hand up from your hip to place a firm smack against your ass, in the same spot every time. You were sure there'd be a mark, but you didn't care because it felt so fucking good. Then, she'd angled herself just ever so slightly differently and began to hit a spot that you didn't even know existed.

"Oh, oh god! Fuck yes, right there Ellie. Fuckk." You moaned as you called out her name, your hands finding their way to her chest as you began to grind your hips down against her.

"Oh yeah, you like that slut?" She asked, using the rather vulgar name that only got you hotter.

You nodded, feeling as if your vision went hot white at the pleasure you were feeling. It was so phenomenal, you almost thought you mightve been dreaming. But then, she stopped and held your hips tightly so you couldn't move an inch.

"Fucking answer me." She commanded.

"Yes yes. Yes I love it. Please keep going. Please." You whimpered, tears welling in your eyes.

"That's my girl." She smiled as she resumed her rough thrusts, loosening her grip on your hips so you could rut against her as well.

She bit back a moan as the strap had been hitting against her clit just right, that and the sight of you was more than enough to make her cum. The way your tits bounced underneath your scarlet red lace bra, and how beautiful your face looked as you moaned loudly. And oh the way you said her name was just so fucking sexy.

"Ellie- I'm gonna" your breath hitched with a gasp, "fuck 'm gonna cum." your moans got even louder somehow.

"Me too baby, come on cum with me. Come on baby." She'd finally let out a small moan and that sent you over the edge.

However you didn't just cum, you were gushing all over her beautifully long strap as well as her thighs. Ellie moaned louder at the sight of you squirting all over her cock, and then got her own release. She didn't stop pounding into you as she rode out her own high, and it didn't take long before you were feeling overstimulated. But you'd do anything to watch as her eyes squeezed shut with the pleasure of her orgasm.

"Mmn- fuck." She let out a small groan as she removed her cock from your hole, a small string of your slick connecting it still.

You let out a small sigh of exhaustion as you layed against her chest, smiling as her hands came to rub up and down your back. You lied there together for a minute or so before she finally spoke.

"Let's go to my room." She whispered, and you didn't say anything in return.

You'd just followed her upstairs and watched as she removed her strap, sitting on the bed and patting the spot next to her. You joined her and sat with your back against the headboard, leaning forward as she came to kiss you. You'd pulled at her shirt and giggled a bit as she ripped it off, revealing her black sports bra. Then, she'd used one hand to spread your legs before getting into position.

One of her legs straddled your hip, a hand on your shoulder and the other on your waist. Her eyes fell shut as she let out an airy moan when she'd ground her throbbing clit against your own, and you'd let out a similar sound.

"Fuck, baby. Your pussy feels so good against mine." She bit her lip, letting out more moans as she thrusted against you.

Sure, the way Ellie had pounded into you earlier was amazing and beyond pleasurable. But there was just something so euphoric about her sopping wet pussy gliding against your own. The feeling of your slicks mixing together just drove you insane. Apparently it had the same effect on Ellie because she was louder than ever, moaning and whimpering with great pleasure.

Your breath quickened as you felt yourself getting close again, and began to move your own hips against her as well. This made Ellie let out a guttural groan.

"Oh yeah, just like that baby." She said in an almost whisper, her eyes falling shut with pleasure.

And with a few more thrusts, the both of you reached yet another release. Now you weren't the only one making noise, Ellie was moaning while also letting out "thank you's and 'fuck's. After fully riding out your highs, Ellie lied down next to you. She brought a hand to wipe her forehead, it dribbled with sweat and her hair stuck to it a bit.

You felt your eyes vetting heavy, snuggling against Ellies side as you let them fall shut. She'd hold you for a minute before standing up.

"Don't fall asleep yet, baby. I wanna get you cleaned up first." She placed a kiss to your forehead, going to the bathroom then returning with a wet rag.

She wiped you down gently, placing soft kisses along your body on the way. Once she finished that, she'd given you a t-shirt of hers to wear to sleep. She climbed back into bed, pulling you to lay on her chest. You snuggled your head into the crook of her neck, bringing your hands to wrap around her shoulders.

"Goodnight Els." You said sleepily.

"Goodnight baby." She responded with a kiss on top of your head.

#ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x y/n #ellie x reader #ellie x y/n #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x you #ellie x you #ellie smut #ellie x fem reader

2K notes · View notes

rainbowchaox · 8 months

Text

Pissa Headcanon Post:

1) Philza likes to hug Missa with his wings a lot. He is always sorta hovering next to Missa. Missa is cold? Wing. Missa is hot? Wing. Missa is happy? Wing. Missa is sad? Wing. Missa despite this doesn’t realize this is unusual for a avian to be so affectionate. I like to imagine Missa just think this is normal for avians to act like this.

2) Philza is protective of their shared home because in his avian brain that’s their nest. Which is why he is so reluctant to let people access and why he always reminds people it’s “Phil and Missa”. Because it’s theirs. Not his. Missa doesn’t realize this is big. Someone needs to slap his brain with a book about avian courting rituals. Philza has started courting Missa from practically day 1. Missa doesn’t know this. Again someone help him.

3) Missa has been gifted Phil’s feathers and the fact that avians only gift feathers to someone they are courting. Philza would even braid the feathers into Missa hair. As a subtle way to say back off.

4) Missa is taller than Phil. Despite this Phil will pick up Missa easily. I imagine soon into their government assigned marriage Phil realized it’s the best course of option to do to get Missa out of sticky situations. Phil will also perch on his shoulder when he really decides to be playful.

5) Because of Avian instincts Philza really want to preen Missa. But obviously he doesn’t has wings. So instead he tends to play with his hair a lot. And take out whatever debris Missa managed to get in it. He will literally take out like twigs out of Missa hair in front of people once it started bothering him.

6) Missa had to learn quickly how to preen Phil’s wings. And high-key he is the best at preening on the island. Even more so than other Avians. Because boy was high-key must be the best for his husband. Especially considering Phil tends to get his wings dirty easily from all the exploring and adventuring.

7) Like most Avians if you touch his wings randomly Phil would probably attempt some sort of violence. The only people that have unlimited wing access without asking is literally his family and Missa. Again Missa would not realize how big a deal this is. Missa can fully touch Phil’s wings anytime. And knowing Missa would take advantage because softness.

8) Phil avian side immediately found Missa attractive because he was a good singer (a common way for avians to court). Phil is abyssal at singing so the common way he courted is with so much gifts and acts of service.

9) The reason Phil stopped sleeping in the double bed Missa and him shared is because Missa scent left and that made him low key depressed. The main reason behind once Missa came back Philza and him had a massive cuddle.

10) I like to imagine once Missa came back Philza was finally free of most of his stress. His wings not a mess. No eye-bags. Skin clear. Smiling at everything and nothing. And the only thing that happened was Missa coming back. And others that never met Missa and Philza before Missa went away are kinda scared. Because Philza the angel of death himself is all soft and happy. Not dying of stress 24/7.

11) It’s my personal belief that Avians are private but very affectionate. So Philza is actually very affectionate towards Missa. Missa meanwhile can’t handle Philza complimenting him and saying good things about him. Missa is so weak for verbal affection. Please somebody give the poor guy some confidence.

12) Philza is one of the few people that Missa feels safe enough around to take off his skull mask. Most of the island has never seen Missa without his mask.

#special thanks to pepper and co in the discord #pissa #Deathduo #qsmp shipping #Qsmp #I love them your honor

695 notes · View notes

luveline · 1 year

Note

Hi!! I was wondering if you could write anything else for the steve zombie au with the established relationship! It's seriously so good I can't get enough

hi I hope you don’t mind me using your request for the kidnapping fic! r and steve live inside a community during the apocalypse, and she gets kidnapped :( but he’s not gonna stop til he finds her :) pls forgive typos

steve zombie!au <3 fem!reader. tw abduction, drugging, mentioned SA (reader is NOT sa and there is no graphic imagery), guns, general violence. 8k words

When you get 'home' that evening, arms aching from a full day in the community pantry, there's somebody sitting in your bed.

"Fuck, Stevie," you say with a flinch, hand hitting your chest with an audible thud.

"Sorry!" he apologises immediately, springing up to meet you. He's in pyjamas, a foreign sight, freshly washed up. "I got home early and thought you'd be happy to see me."

You reach for his wrists, relief that he's not a murderer or a zombie dulling the panic. "I am," you assure him softly, "of course I am. I missed you."

He smiles and moves in for a hug, kissing your cheek quickly. "I missed you too."

Missed isn't truly the right word. Steve goes out on scouting and scrounging missions for the community voluntarily, and every time he leaves you worry he's going to die, because it is a very likely outcome. There hasn't been a community fatality in weeks, but that doesn't help soothe the ache of his absence.

"You smell really nice. Did you get a hot shower?"

"Perks," he says, faking modesty.

"Perks," you grumble. "I spent the whole day lifting canned tuna and I don't get a hot shower."

His smile doubles in size. "No? Well then, it's a good thing you have such a nice boyfriend," —he digs in his pocket, unveiling a green plastic shower token with a smirk— "huh?"

"Is that for me?" you ask, grumbling completely gone.

"If you want it. There's a catch, though."

"What's the catch?"

You can both hear how in love you sound. In a world where hot showers are rare and valuable as diamond, his giving you a shower token may as well be an "I love you'. It's selfless.

"Kiss before you go?" he asks.

"That's not a catch," you say, taking his face into your hands. His cheeks are soft, stubble shaved away.

You rub his bottom lip with your thumb. "Get into any danger?"

"None. Not a geek in sight."

"Good boy," you say, thumbs either side of his lips now, leaning in for a perfect, prim kiss.

You move back and rake the hair away from his face, upward, and for a moment he looks as he did before again. His hair falls back down and he's still beautiful, the guy you love.

"Are you sure I can have it?"

"I got it for you," he says, "but if you really don't want it-"

"No, I want it," you deny quickly, eyes narrowed at his nearly ditzy smile. He can be so evil.

Steve climbs into your bed, a myriad of blankets and quilts and sheets, anything to stay warm. Honestly, you and Steve are pack rats now you have a place to keep your things, and you love to be comfortable together. That means soft things and nice smells are a must.

You turn to your bathroom hamper and pick up one of your two shower gels, a silver of soap, and the brand new bottle of shampoo you'd been given a few days ago. It's your prized possession.

"Don't take that soap," Steve says, "there's a new bar by the sink, take that one."

"We really shouldn't waste it."

"We won't."

You shake your head at him fondly. "It's fine, I'll use it. Keep the new one for cold, sad showers."

His head sinks back into your pillows, his face turning toward your side. He couldn't be less obvious about it if he tried, pulling your pillow toward him until the pillowcase is rubbing his nose.

You wrap your things in a towel, also nice and soft, and hesitate at the door. Steve's eyes have closed. You know he isn't sleeping, and that if you ask him to, he'll come and sit outside of the shower stall to fend off your paranoia. But you're trying to give life here a chance, a proper one. You have no reason to fear for your safety — the shower block is only five minutes away in the old College's gym.

You put your stuff down at the end of the bed and climb on knees beside him.

"I'm gonna go shower now," you say.

Steve goes to sit up, eyes fluttering open, and you hold him down, peppering his cheek with three, four, five quick kisses. "No, stay. Love you."

“You stay and sleep. I’ll be back soon. So soon.”

"You sure?"

"Yes," you say, smothered against his cheek. You give him another kiss for good measure, a selfish one, as most of them are. You hope he enjoys receiving them as much as you love bestowing them. Your lips practically tingle.

"Okay. Love you. See you in twenty."

"Twenty," you promise.

Another kiss sneaks its way in there before you're grabbing all your stuff; your bathroom necessities, your change of clothes and your room key on a string you hang around your neck. You slip out the door and down the hall of Little Hawkins, stepping over a hallway game of speed played by two opposite tenants you recognise from high school and slinking sideways round one of Mallory's huge art projects propped up against the wall.

It's dark outside. To keep a low profile, the community you live in, sometimes called The College, or some variation of its real name, Valley Pine Community College, opts to keep the lights off at night. There are fairy lights strung up to gently guide anyone who needs to move around, and considering it's not even 7PM yet, there are lots of people outside.

"Hey, kid."

You hug your bundle of things closer. "Hi, Hopper."

Chief Hopper is standing in the middle of the squad with Joyce Byers and Jeremy Livingstone, his second in command and his co-leader, respectively.

"Shower?"

You smile sheepishly. "Steve gave me a token."

"How romantic," Joyce says sweetly.

"He's a secret sweetheart," you mumble.

"Could you tell him to be a little more secretive? He's setting a precedent here," Jeremy says.

The three adults laugh. You nod politely and bid them goodbye with a smile, cutting over the grass of the quad where a path has been worn by shoes just like yours to the gym.

There's usually someone there until 10PM. Everyone needs a shower after a long day, and lukewarm ones are totally free. It's hot water showers that need a token, because they need the generator to run. Jeremy does his best to keep the distribution of tokens fair, but people still use them to barter for other things. You imagine that's how Steve came to have two.

Sure enough, a young woman you think is called Tori sits in a chair by the door to the shower room, foot propped up on another chair and crutches on the floor.

She accepts your token and puts it in a basket with the others, all handmade and flimsy. "You need me to do it?" she asks.

"No, that's okay. Stay sitting." She smiles gratefully.

The shower room is clean and cool. You put down your towel, grinning at the leftmost shower. There you are, you think cheerfully. Then a sound behind you, the soft fall of one step.

You don't remember much after that.

—

Steve falls asleep waiting for you.

He wakes, reaching for your body in bed next to his, expecting an armful of your softness, your tummy or your chest. He opens his bleary eyes in search of you when he comes up empty, mumbling your name in the dark. His arm feels heavy as he lifts it to check the time. 9.44PM. He looks around the entirety of your small room. You're not here.

He bolts up fast, bone deep nausea spreading and pervasive, his neck protesting the sudden movement with a twinge. Thighs swung over the sheets, he stumbles onto discordant footing.

You're not out on the quad, and neither is anyone else. He follows the string lights to the gym and there are no signs of life. He makes it all the way to the shower room before he sees somebody, a girl on crutches hobbling toward him with a flashlight helmet clipped over her forehead.

"Hey," he says, slowing, "have you seen Y/N? She's this tall, wearing a royal blue hoodie? You can't miss her."

She falters. "I- yeah, I saw her. Maybe an hour ago?"

"Is she still here?"

"The building's presumably empty."

Steve skirts around her to look for himself, but she says, "Wait, wait."

She readjusts her grip on her crutches. "I didn't see her leave, but she wasn't in the showers. I checked."

"You didn't see her leave?"

"No, I thought it was weird, but I figured she'd had too long in the hot water and felt guilty about it. I was gonna tell Hopper at the town hall."

The town hall isn't a town hall at all, it's a space cleared in the cafeteria. Hopper lingers there most nights so people can talk to him without feeling pressured by their peers. You and Steve always call it the 'snitching hour', instead of the witching hour.

"You're sure she's not there?"

"I checked every stall."

He doesn't believe her, because if you aren't in the shower, where are you? You haven't made any friends yet, you aren't situated, you have Steve and you have the older lady Mallory, and that's it.

He's not too proud to admit he sprints to the shower room, calling your name and checking behind each stall door, each changing partition curtain. The only thing he finds is a slither of soap, the shard of bar soap he'd told you to throw away, lying on the floor.

You'd insisted you wouldn't waste it.

He picks it up and pockets it, throwing his gaze around the room in another circle to be sure.

You aren't here.

He runs back up the hallways and through the front entrance, where the girl on crutches is hobbling toward the main building that houses the cafeteria. His heart races with a strange adrenaline — he shouldn't panic, right? You could be anywhere, and anywhere doesn't have to mean somewhere unsafe. You could be with Mallory, with Robin. Hell, you could be with Dustin. He's half expecting to find you in the canteen, fresh and smelling sweet, sitting at one of the long dinner tables for club night. You'd said you wanted to learn gin rummy.

You aren't in the cafeteria and neither are the cards club, but Hopper is. He has a paperback in his lap, and a cigarette is held between his lips pointing down, illuminated by a small lamp on the table behind him.

"Woah, where's the fire?"

"Have you seen Y/N?"

Hopper doesn't like his tone, the panic it's laced with. His expression hardens from surprise to concern, paperback closed. "Hours ago. She was on her way to the gym. She didn't come back?"

"No."

"She usually stray?" Hopper asks.

They both know the answer is no. You don't go anywhere that isn't scheduled work or the gym showers without Steve; while your distrust of this place and the people here has waned since you arrived, it's still very much alive.

"Never."

"Don't panic," Hopper says, though he looks a little unsettled himself. He hides it swiftly. "Half the people here are your age, she probably just got to talking."

He stands up, shoving his paperback on top of the fold out chair and zippering his jacket closed.

Steve rubs his mouth, in a daze, searching his thoughts for where you'll be.

"Harrington?"

"What?" Steve asks, looking up.

"You might want to get some warmer pants on. We'll start searching. Door to door. Wake your friends up." Hopper clears his throat. "She's here somewhere."

His confidence eases Steve's roaring pulse. He looks down, finds he's still wearing the polka dot pyjamas he'd fallen asleep in. He'd been too worried about you to notice.

—

You feel majorly unwell. Eyes so sore they beg to stay closed, throat raw like you've been forced to eat sandpaper. Your hand knocks out and hits something solid.

"Stevie," you say. Your voice is patchy, frosted over. "It's freezing. Did you," —you cough as you raise your head from your pillow— "leave a window open, baby?"

A cold gale of wind rushes over you. Goosebumps erupt down the lengths of your naked arms, and your eyes open finally, searching for the cause of the desperate cold.

You fear for a moment you've gone blind.

The sky is dark. A deep, formidable blue with a smattering of stars. Your breath catches as you take them in. They appear by the handful, flecks that well like drops of blood to pinpricks.

You are not in bed.

This is not your room.

"You've been sleeping for hours. You're fucking heavy, did you know that?"

You turn your head slowly, prey and predator, hoping your stillness will deter any sudden movements.

"Where are we?" you ask, trying to get a good look at the body next to you.

You're not sure if it's the right question. He likes it, though, and his hand squeezes yours where your fingers rest, intertwined, against his chest. Sickness wraps around your stomach and wrings it, a strange haziness concluding your thoughts.

"Don't worry about it."

Panic lights every nerve ending and a wretched trembling runs down your arms, your legs. You try to make it stop before he can feel it. You know your fear is a currency.

"Are you cold?" he asks. His voice is neither warm nor frigid, each syllable said with an impassiveness that leaves little to be inferred.

"I don't have my coat." The words don't want to be said.

"We left in a hurry."

"We did?"

Your throat aches. You try to remember why you're here, fingers dead still in his hold. There's something soft behind your head, a throw blanket that scratches your cheek. You don't know who he is. You don't recognise anything about him, moonlight splashing milky light over his face and neck. He has a broad scar under his jaw, but beside that, this man is completely unassuming.

"You don't remember?"

You shake your head. "No," you say softly.

"You fell in the shower. I helped you up. You told me you wanted to leave."

"Leave?" you ask.

"The College."

"I said that?"

"You didn't have to say it. I know you hated it there."

You swallow, uselessly, over and over. The night sky pours Onto you. Your pulse bumps, bumps, bumps.

"Who are you?" you ask.

"You don't know me?"

His fingers tighten around yours.

"I- I'm new," you defend.

"Of course you don't know me. Nobody fucking knows me. I thought shit was bad before all this, you know?" His grip tightens worse. "Invisible at work, at home. And there were so many people, I mean, fucking thousands of people, I was a nobody. I thought maybe now I'd be somebody, but you don't know who I am."

Please, you think, please. What's his name?

"Connor," you say quietly, hoping to pass it off as nothing if you've gotten it wrong.

His grip relaxes ever so slightly. "I knew you were different. You see me, and I see you."

He moves toward you, and he must see you flinch backward into the solid, frozen earth behind your back. His smile flickers. He leans over your face, dark, long hair tickling your cheek.

"I know you hated that place just as much as I did. So we left."

Looking back, you'll wonder why you acted as you did. Acting into his delusion. That night, you wait hours for him to fall asleep. He never does. Each time you try to pull your hand from his, you're met with a fiercely suspicious look. You feign sleep.

The sky slowly lightens. You stand when he stands and you pull your hand from his whether he wants it or not, so cold you feel like you've been burned all over, so tired you're surprised you have the strength to scramble backward.

He turns, and you notice the gun tucked into his waistband for the first time.

"Where are you going?" he asks, hand inching up his leg.

You take a step toward him, wobbly on purpose. "I think I'm stiff from the floor." You smile at him awkwardly.

He sees bashful where he should terrified. "I will miss the mattresses. Don't worry, we'll find you something to lie on." Your skin crawls.

"Where are we going?"

He points southward.

You're no genius, but you assume that means The College is northward.

A bullet can follow you a hundred feet away. Running brazenly won't work. Though you're guessing he'll kill you outright rather than let you escape, which may not be the case. He's running on delusion — he has a saviour complex, clearly, to have stolen you like this. He wants you, and you have to assume he wants you alive.

"Can I have some water?" you ask.

The ache in your throat is a burn. You imagine this is how it feels to have a geek maw deep in your flesh, a sizzling burn, a heated fear.

He digs through his singular rucksack and pulls out a litre bottle of water full to the cap. You take it, guzzle it, and choke when he cusses. "Fuck- Stop! Are you stupid? We have to make it last."

Water dribbles down your chin as he snatches it out of your hand.

"Sorry," you say. It feels as though you've swallowed a stone. "Sorry, I didn't know. I couldn't know, I don't know any of your plans, Connor."

He stuffs the water back into the bag and procures a white length of plastic. It takes you a second to realise it's a zip tie. Much less to feel terror reignite itself in the depths of your stomach.

"Wrists together."

"Connor, I don't think-"

"You're smart, aren't you?"

Quiet stretches. The sun leaks desperately needed warmth through the thick tree branches, sun rays painting his skin blazing white as he rags your wrists together and wraps the zip ties around them. The plastic bites into your skin unapologetically.

"I wanted you to take me," you say. "What's the need?"

He smiles. Teeth white, gums red. Stark.

"You're smart," he repeats. "I'm smarter. Now come on. Walk."

—

Steve doesn't find you.

Hopper gives him invasive free reign over the community like a dirty cop. He tells everybody at breakfast exactly what's happening. He asks if anybody has seen you. He asks if you've made plans to run away. He says that, if you're in hiding, he'll protect you, even if that means protection from Steve.

Steve's not even mad. If you are hiding from him (you're not, of course you're not, but if you are — Steve almost wishes you were, just so he'd know you were safe) you're doing an amazing job. There are no traces of you, and as the hours stretch into a full day without you, Steve's borderline homicidal. He has slammed on every door. He has checked every dormitory room, every public space. He has pulled boards from closed over windows, and kicked in weakened door jams of every building within the fences.

Currently, though, he's having a breakdown. Tears, ugly and messy and loud, race down his face. He's running so hot they practically steam. Robin stands on the other side of the stall. He's really hoping she'll pretend she can't hear him, but she says, "Yikes, Steve."

"Where the fuck is she?" he asks, sounding about as numb as he feels.

"I don't know."

Her response is softer. Robin knows Steve isn't angry at her, and doesn't take his scathing question personally. The fear he's feeling is overwhelming, hence his tears. (The tears are made of worry, too.)

"Somebody-" God, the thought is like white hot heat cattle poked into his spine, anger wells to the surface. "Has her. Somebody's fucking done something to her. She wouldn't just leave."

He stares at the stall door and wills tears away. This isn't helping you.

"Steve," Robin says, "don't bite my head off. What if she did leave?"

It hurts because it's what he's been asking himself. Under the anger and the fear for you, there's fear of you. What if you've abandoned him? Loved him this long to toss in the towel at the finish line?

Still, he defends the you he knows you are. "Fuck off, Buckley. I love you, but fuck you."

"No, listen to me Steve."

"Robin-"

"I believe she wouldn't 'just leave' but that doesn't mean she didn't leave," Robin says in a rush, fighting to be heard. "I know she's- I know you're both in that gross, disgusting, married for sixty years, buried in the same plot, holding hands kind of love-"

"The point?"

"So I'm agreeing with you, asshole. I don't think she'd leave of her own volition, but she's not here."

"What if she is? What if I go look for her and she's here and Barney from the kitchen has her tied up under his mattress?"

"We've looked," Robin says, anger colouring her own tone now. "We've fucking looked, Steve, you and me and Dustin, Mike and Hopper, we've been in every room and hashing this out won't make her magically reappear, we need to go look for her. Maybe she did fucking leave you, and maybe she's lost. Whatever it is, you're gonna kill yourself not looking.

"Time to make a decision," she adds. "The longer we sit here the further away she gets."

Tears burst unbidden in a race to his jawline.

He knows you better than he knows himself. He knows you've loved him for a long time, maybe since the day you met. He's loved you almost as long, and he doesn't care how selfish it sounds when he says he loves you so much more. If the last time you'd spent together is it — sorry, but Steve can't accept it. A slurred out 'Love you' and your kisses warming his cheek. That can't be all there is.

He'd spend the rest of his life looking for you, if only to feel the weight of your body between his legs, your sleeping face tucked under his chest. Your hands, forever cold, chasing the heat of his spine as you slip them under his t-shirt.

Hopper looks reluctant at the suggestion.

"Kid-"

"I'm not really asking. I need permission to get my bat back from the armoury, and food. Or forget the food." Someone knocks into his back and apologises. The cafeteria is teeming with people. Steve doesn't stop to look back to see who it is.

"It's not about supplies. Everybody is accounted for, we checked, do you know what that means? Nobody else is with her." Nobody took her, he implies. She left of her own volition.

"That's exactly why I need to go."

"She took a rucksack with her."

Steve blinks.

"Three litres of water. Enough food for a month, and a pistol."

You're smarter than three litres of water. And—

Steve's heart skips. "She doesn't know how to use a gun."

He knows exactly what's happened to you. Even if everybody else thinks he's crazy, or stupid, or plain naive, he knows you wouldn't take a gun, so somebody else took one, and then they took you. He imagines you with the barrel pressed to your nape and brims with indignation.

Hopper grabs Steve's arm tightly before he can turn away. He likely doesn't want a scene in the cafeteria, not when the arts and crafts club is sitting two tables away, a whole classroom of children with delicate dispositions.

"You're sure you want to go out there and look for her? Kid, nobody saw her leave, there's no signs of struggle. Chances are she left willingly."

"You really believe that? Honestly?"

His expression says everything Steve needs to know. Hopper doesn't believe what he's saying — he's feeding Steve a narrative in the hopes that it'll spare him. His decision is a hard one to make, prioritising the lives of the many over the few, and it's noble, but Steve couldn't care less about the risks.

Hopper realises his plan is not going to work. He roughs up his hair and sighs.

"Can't work a gun?" he asks Steve, nearly defeated.

"She would pick the knife."

"Fine. Better round up anybody stupid enough to go with you."

—

"I think you're handsome," you say.

Connor glares at you. He'd been in the middle of a self-hating rant, how he's ugly and how girls are all shallow. He's not even that ugly, but his expression, so full of hate, makes him monstrous.

"I do," you further.

"Yeah, right."

Your wrists hurt. The zip tie cuts into your skin even in efforts to hold your wrists together. You're raw, almost bleeding. And you're so fucking cold; this guy's an idiot, and you're gonna die of hypothermia if you can't charm him into giving you his coat.

Your plan is awful and it likely won't work. You're trying to seduce him so you can take his gun, and hope you don't have to actually fire it. You've never killed somebody before, but you're willing to do what you need to if it means you'll survive. Your thoughts won't stop spiralling about Steve. He loves you. He's looking for you. If he never finds you, his life will be more ruined than it is already, and you'd never forgive yourself for that. You care about him too much to want to put him through the guilt of losing you. How he'd been looking for Robin, you don't want him to be that version of himself again. Closed off to everything, and everyone.

Under all that you're still hoping he's going to save you. You're gonna hear him calling. You hope — you know — Steve won't think you've left. While you haven't been quiet about your doubts living in The College, you wouldn't leave without him. Steve is the safest place in the world.

"Connor," you say, eyes on his face and unflinching, determined to lie well, "are you kidding? Out of everyone, I only showed you how I was feeling. Why do you think that is?"

He stares at you.

You make a show of shivering. It isn't difficult.

"You're the kindest person there, I know that," you say. "Nobody else would risk what you are to help me escape. Nobody, not even-" You wince. "Not even Steve."

"Ugh, don't talk about him," Connor says. "You won't ever have to see that mindless idiot again."

"You promise?"

He stops walking. "You don't want to see him?"

"No," you lie. "I- look, Connor, I know it's not something to be proud of, and I'm not proud of it, but I knew he could take care of me, you know? We were all alone, and I just needed someone to look after me. I was so scared. And I felt like I owed him."

"You could've left him the moment you got to The College."

You put on a sad little smile. I'm sorry, you think desperately. I'm sorry, Steve.

"He wouldn't let me."

Quiet prevails again, the only sounds the wind and your shoes over brittle foliage.

"I wanted to talk to you, and I think he could tell. He'd always pull me away when we s-s-saw you."

His eyebrows furrow gently, a softness on his face that might seem genuine if there were any light behind his eyes. Connor peels off his jacket and tries to help you into it.

"My wrists."

"Right," he says.

He pulls out a penknife. You know what to do, planning how you'll enact your next move in your head as he cuts you loose and helps your numb arms and fingers into the sleeves. He zips you up. You try not to breathe.

He takes a half step back, and his breath turns to a grunt, hands cruel at your wrists when you throw yourself at him. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Trying to hug you…" You say, heart a hummingbird in your chest. "I'm sorry, I just- I just wanted to say thank you."

"You want to say thank you?" he asks,

You regret it. You've already decided, as horrible as it is, that if he tries to hurt you or force you to do anything intimate with him, you're going to run, gun or no gun. This decision changes every other second. Better to let him hurt you like that and live, or better to die?

"Yes," you say breathlessly. "I want to say thank you."

"There's a cabin not far from here. That's where we're going. I've been getting it ready for us. You can show me how grateful you are when we get there, so pick up the pace."

"A cabin?" you ask, tripping over your untied laces in your hurry to do as he says.

"I've been getting it ready for weeks," he says. "Sneaking back and forth hasn't been easy, you know? Fucking migraine."

Sneaking back and forth.

Who is he? Sneaking? Why would he need to? Who the fuck is he? You know of him as you know most people, and you'd been lucky to remember his name. If he hadn't gone on supply and scrounging trips with Steve, you wouldn't have.

A memory.

He'd been with Steve.

Two weeks ago, Steve had come home depressed. Deflated, he'd encouraged you down into bed and laid out on top of you, frown pressed to your collar. You'd drawn a confession from him in ribbons, one hand rubbing his back until the tension he'd carried slipped away, the other resting at the back of his head. He'd been on a scouting trip, and he'd lost his partner. No sign of him, no signs of a geek death, nothing. He'd disappeared.

That had been Connor, and everybody thinks he's dead.

If they believe you left, they believe it was by yourself. You have to hope Steve believes you'd never go without him.

If he doesn't, you are completely alone.

—

Robin ties her shoe laces tightly. They're new, and they're startlingly white. Nothing ever looks so white these days. Bleach is a resource they can't make, and it gets hoarded by the medical team whenever they find any. Clothes here aren't dirty, but they'll never be pristine.

She puts her foot back on to the floor next to Steve's back, where he poked around under her bed for useful things to take. Her torch, her batteries, her rucksack.

"Robin… is this a fucking illegal food store?"

"That's blowing it out of proportion."

He climbs out from under the bed and drops her armful of twinkies, moon cakes, and a single Hershey's cookies 'n' creme.

"You can take that one," she says, pointing at the Hershey's. "A treat for lovergirl. You may need leverage to win her back."

He takes it. At this point, Robin's sure he'd cut his own hand off to bring you back with them. She kicks the rest of her contraband haphazardly under the bed and gets into a sweater, then another sweater, before zippering a winter coat over top. Robin's young, and mildly fit, not in shape but not out of it, so she volunteers for supply runs when Hopper asks for them. She can climb, and she's skinny enough to fit into places that other people can't. She's ready to go look for you.

Steve stands and makes his way to the door, swinging his rucksack over his shoulder.

They move out to the quad, where a sad roster of rescue squad applicants wait. Jonathan Byers sits on the low wall of the fountain, with a girl called Vanessa on one side, and a guy called Christopher on the other. Dustin and Mike stand talking, and Steve is barely in hearing range when he says, "You aren't coming, Henderson."

He stops in front of the fountain. "Are you ready?"

They all stand. Jonathan, surprisingly, has a gun strapped to his hip. "Hopper's orders," he says, sounding how Steve feels.

"Steve," Dustin says.

"You aren't allowed to come, for starters."

"I am, we're sixteen, we can-"

"Can't. That's why Will isn't here, right? Or Lucas? Because they actually listen when Hopper says no."

Mike glares. "I'm not here to go save your girlfriend."

"Awesome." Steve relaxes the tiniest bit, slapping Dustin's arm as they pass. "Thanks, Henderson, but you can't come. Stay here and make sure nobody claims our room."

Dustin shouts a string of expletives at their backs.

They pass through the North fence checkpoint. They're trying to retrace your steps. There aren't many to retrace. They assume you've gone North of the camp because South of it is Indiana, and Steve can't see why you'd backtrack.

They walk for hours. The sun moves through the sky all lazy and slow, tortuously so, and the only thing Steve can think of is you. It burns.

The first hint of you is a scrap of fabric. It isn't yours as far as he knows, but he and Robin look at it, look at each other, and then pick up the pace. A half hour later they almost miss it, a black button in amongst dry earth. An hour later, there's a water bottle cap.

"Holy fucking shit," Robin says. "She's leaving us breadcrumbs."

"She's a smart girl," Steve says, too defensive considering Robin's praising you. "Of course she is."

"I've been thinking," Jonathan says, his voice low and gravelly from a long period of quiet. "The theory is that she's uh, been kidnapped, right?"

"That's the theory," Steve says tightly. Trying his best not to be a dick, because Jonathan hasn't done anything wrong.

"So who took her?"

Steve's migraine throbs. He has this tension like a knit behind his eyes. He doesn't know who took you, he can't work it out, and it doesn’t make any sense. Hopper checked the lists and everybody in the community had been accounted for, and Steve had seen nearly every face himself hammering on doors.

"My mom poured over that list, she ticked everybody off," Jonathan continues.

"It doesn't make any sense," Steve says, "I know that, but she wouldn't leave like that, not–"

"No, I'm not saying that," Jonathan says quickly. "I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm saying we have to think outside of the box. Whoever took her isn't on the register."

"But they somehow knew enough about The College to take her without anybody seeing them," Vanessa says timidly.

"They took her from the shower room," Steve says quietly. "Her soap was still there, 'nd the girl on duty said she never came out of the first door again, so they took her from the back, and quietly."

"Maybe she got lured out," Robin says. "Maybe they tricked her."

Jonathan closes the small walking gap between himself and Steve, face earnest and concerned. He looks like a friend.

"Remember Tina and Sadie, they left two weeks ago to look for their mom? They're not on the register, they could still be close."

"But what would they want from her?" Christopher asks sceptically.

Steve feels an inkling of memory…

"Steve," Robin says apprehensively, giving him major side eye.

"It's fucking–" Heat like nothing he's ever felt burns behind his eyes. If he could, Steve would squat down on the ground and just sit there for a while, until this rush of fire and fear and missing you had toned it down, but he can't stop moving, so he staggers to keep walking. "Connor. It's Connor."

"The Creep?" Robin asks.

"I thought he died?" Vanessa asks.

Steve picks up the pace of his steps, and tries to explain coherently, though his voice sounds ragged as his thoughts, "He didn't die, he– he disappeared. And he was so weird, he kept asking me about my girl, and just thought he was a perv, he–" Steve looks at his small group. "He was too interested in her. I should've seen it."

"So he's not dead?"

Steve's thinking that might be up for debate.

—

The cabin is a shit show. When Connor bragged about fixing it up, you'd stupidly believed he actually fixed it up. His delusion stretches beyond you. It's cold to the point where your worries of hypothermia are no longer worries but eventualities, especially now he's realised the same thing and taken his coat back off of you. It hadn't fit well anyhow.

You huddle in the corner of the room where a small wood fire burns in the stove, not too shameful to hold your numb fingers over the flame. Connor rages behind you, grumbling hate to himself and slamming whatever it is he can find against other things. Door to the frame, chair to the wall, his bag kicked across the room. You know that, eventually, his anger will turn to you. Projection of anger has rules. The wall won't look nearly as satisfying as a bruise.

You turn to look at him over your shoulder as demurely as you can. You've smoothed down your hair, wiped your dirty face, and while you're no angel, he chose you, right? You must at least be his type.

Or maybe you'd been an easy target.

You wish you'd listened to Mallory all those weeks ago when she'd told you that having only Steve was a terrible idea. Not because having Steve is terrible, having Steve is everything, but because you can't imagine many people who'd be willing to fight for you. If he's coming to find you it's likely all by himself. Can Steve overpower this guy? You'd thought you could but you're not so sure. He's a tall man, an easy six foot.

He's scaring you.

You would try to calm him down if you weren’t worried he’d want you to show you how grateful you are for being rescued. You’d rather he rail at the window than touch you.

A sound like splintering wood has you flinching forward and away from him, hands dangerously close to the fire. You pull them away with a gasp, reminding Connor of your presence.

“What?” he asks.

“Nothing,” you say hurriedly. “You should come and sit down, huh? You’ve been walking all day.”

He sits down beside you after a pensive, dramatic minute rubbing his own head. He drops his bag by your feet and you take whatever warmth you can, hiding your shoes underneath it.

When he puts his hand on your thigh, you try to pretend it’s Steve. Steve sitting next to you, warm and soft and ready to pull you into his lap, that place between his legs, chest to chest and eye to eye. You want his hand in your hair, and his hot back under your frostbitten fingers.even when you were new, not quite in love, he’d let you hide your hands under his t-shirt. He’s that kind of good, right down to the marrow in his bones.

You wish you’d known what was going to happen. Not even to ask him to come with you. You think after everything the two of you deserve a proper goodbye. All that pain and all that affection and this is how it ends?

Connor’s hand creeps further down the length of your leg. You think, alright. Alright. I’ll do whatever I have to do if I get to see Steve again.

A sound like cracking wood echoes outside.

Connor is up and against the wall in two blinks. You follow him, breathing shallow as you peer outside. You’d agreed to the wood fire, knowing you’d get irretrievably sick without it, but you hadn’t mentioned the rule. You and Steve didn’t have too many, just enough to keep you alive, and the most important was to know the area before lighting a fire while it’s still light out. The smoke is a dead giveaway every time.

Another sound.

Someone has seen the smoke.

“What do we do?” you whisper.

He holds up his hand.

“What are we gonna do?”

“Let me think.”

“Should we put out the fire?”

“Shut up!” he says harshly. “Shut up, Jesus Christ. I can’t think with you jabbering in my ear.”

Connor opens his backpack and takes out a zip tie.

“No,” you say, shaking your head emphatically, “no, you can’t.”

“It’s this or I handcuff you to the radiator,” he says.

A silence stretches between you both. He grabs your wrists and closes the zip tie around your wrist until you’re sure your hands will fall off, plastic digging cruelly into the lines already there.

“You’re evil,” you murmur.

His eyes turn to frosted glass. For the second time, you think, There’s nothing there. Nothing kind. Obviously not: he’s such a loser he felt he had to take a girl captive to get some. Fucking freak.

He takes your face into his hand, squeezing your jaw in his paw of a hand. You whimper, your teeth grinding and your bones creaking from the force of it.

“Stay quiet.”

You stare.

“Say ‘yes’.”

His fingers dig into your skin so hard you know you’ll have fingernail welts.

“Yes,” you say, feeling as though you’ve choked on your own tongue. “I’ll be quiet.”

He throws your face away and your head smacks the wall. No more happy families. You cringe and slide down into yourself, a curled ball as he leaves the room. The gun clicks in his hands as he switches off the safety, and another metallic sound follows. You know it isn’t good.

You cower for a moment, freaked out beyond words, and then you pull it together. For Steve. You sit up and press an awkward hand to your aching, stinging jaw. There’s blood on your fingers when you pull your bound hands away. You slide onto your knees and struggle to stand, shoulders riding the wall. Your ears are posted for a sound. There are a hundred options and you don’t want any of them. Run away, get killed by whoever’s out there. Run away, get killed by Connor. Run away, get killed by a geek. Run away, survive, and never find a way to unbind yourself. Run away into the hands of someone crueller. Run away and never find Steve.

A female voice calls out.

“We just want to talk!”

That’s nobody you know. It’s not Robin. You try not to feel heartbroken, and when you do you try to hold it rather than have it drag you down. It’s not Steve, fine, but it’s a woman, and she’s probably a whole lot safer than Connor.

“I’m armed!” Connor shouts.

You walk slowly to the window and peer through. Down the cabin steps and in the grass stands a dark silhouette you know is Connor. Further along is a woman and another figure. You’re not sure who.

“So are we!” she calls.

“Fuck,” you whisper, tears pricking the corners of your eyes. What are you supposed to do? What’s the answer here?

The shouting out front continues, but that’s not what distracts you— there are sounds coming from behind. There’s someone at the back door. You cast your gaze around the room to look for something that can help you. There’s a fire poker on the floor near the wood stove. You rush to grab it, almost falling at the weight of your own head.

The first pop of the gun makes you drop it. Tears roll down your cheeks as you scramble to grab it again, hands shaking hard as footsteps sound in the hall. Another gunshot makes you gasp, the third has you swallowing a sob. You press yourself hard into the wall with the poker held aloft.

The door opens.

For a second, a split-second, you don’t recognise him.

“Steve!” Jonathan Byers shouts, grinning, “I got her!”

Thudding races from the kitchen and down the hallway. Steve appears behind Jonathan like a dream, a dizzying relief to see in all his pale sweetness.

You drop the poker and a sob comes so hard you can’t keep your eyes open. You’ve never felt anything like this. A nightmare over so suddenly and all you can do is fight to open your eyes.

Steve crosses the room, steps over Connor’s tantrum like it isn’t there, and wraps his arms around you. It’s a different kind of tightness, nothing like the cruel press of Connor’s fingers. Steve pulls you together, steadies you, cheek smashed into the top of your head and arms circling your shoulders. Your fingers shake, you can’t move your hands, and still you curl them around his coat uselessly. You can’t get a hold on him, but it doesn’t matter. Steve has you.

“It’s okay,” he’s saying, strands of panic sewn between the reassurance in his lovely voice. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Come on.” You’re crying like a little kid. You can’t stop, and you can’t breathe. “Hey, hey, it’s okay.”

Steve draws away from you, barely an inch, to slide the blade of his pen knife between your wrists. The zip tie splits and you vy for him weakly, your hands to his waist.

He shoves the pen knife into his pocket and grabs your arm. “I know, I know, but we have to go. We can’t stay here, the noise’ll draw company we don't want.” His hand roams up to your neck. He cups your face, his palm blistering to your chilled cheek. “Hey,” he says, smiling a rare smile. “My girl… it’ll be okay. I’m gonna fix it. Everything’s gonna be okay, I promise.”

He nods at you hopefully. You swallow your sobbing until it’s a wet gasping sounds and nod back. He looks at you for a charged second, before he wraps his arms around you again. Gentle, so, so careful. Your head rests in the crook of his arm, a crop of kisses laid over your cold cheek.

“You’re freezing,” he murmurs.

“I’m okay,” you say. “I’m fine now.”

—

Steve sits in the path of the window, afternoon light drizzling into his eyes and over your sleeping face. He squints against its brightness and stands to pull the curtains closed, fingertips on your shoulder. He has to stretch to reach, but he refuses to stop touching you. He’s worried you’ll disappear if he does. Contact keeps you here.

Curtains closed, he sits back down tentatively, looking for your hand in the mess of blankets and quilts covering your body. He’s wiped the blood from your cheeks, tended to your small inflamed cuts with disinfectant. He’s wrapped your sore wrists, spent hours rubbing your frostbitten fingers, worried the cold killed your circulation. You’ve slept for hours now, only stirring when he had to use the bathroom. He’d been gone for less than a minute, a heart attack in sixty seconds, and you’d been awake and trying to get out of bed when he got back.

He stays close.

He just wants you to rest.

Steve pulls back the blankets and slips in beside you slowly. You turn into his movements, and when he’s flat on his back you let your weight rest on him completely. Your breathing tells him you’re waking up, not quite slow, not quite deep.

He takes your hand into both of his and hugs it. Found it, he thinks.

“Stevie,” you utter.

“Yeah, I’m here.”

You smile and push your face into the juncture of his neck.

There aren’t really words for what Steve feels. Relief like a hurricane. Guilt something worse. Love, anger, worry. It’s all mixed together and he can’t pull one from the other, but he knows one thing.

“I couldn’t live without you,” he mumbles.

“Good,” you say. You snort into his skin. “Not good, baby, that’s awful, but-” You pull your hand from his to wrap it around his shoulders. He pulls you up onto his chest. “Good, ‘cause I can’t live without you.”

“You don’t have to.”

Your voice is scratchy from a lot of tears. He never wants to hear you cry like that again. He’s only heard it once before, when you’d fallen through the first floor of a dilapidated house a hundred miles away, and after hours where he’d assumed you’d never wake up again, you did, and you’d been in so much pain you couldn’t stay still. You’d shook for days.

“I would’ve looked for you until I found you,” he says, unsure what he wants. He thinks, selfishly, that he’d like some comfort.

“I know,” you say, your hand moving up, up to his hair.

You lean back to see him, the two of you nose to nose, and stroke his hair away from his forehead one strand at a time.

“Will you kiss me?” you whisper.

“Depends,” he whispers back. “What’s in it for me?”

“Anything you want.”

He smirks at you. “Already got everything I want right here.”

“In that case, you’ll have to consider it part of your philanthropy, handsome. I’m a charity case.”

“How dare you say that about my girl,” he says, his feigned indignation hard to believe with the mildness of his tone, and his lips so close to yours.

He kisses you, worried you’ll fall apart. It’s a sad kiss, not what he’d expected, though it’s better than the terrified one he’d stolen before you fell asleep. That had been nervous energy and imprecise, all the urgency of your first kiss and none of the finesse.

“Are you okay?” you ask, peeling away from his case to frame his face in your hands.

He could say no. Tears burn behind his eyes, his nose stings, he could burst into tears in your arms.

“How can you ask me that?” he asks, watching as your eyes pinch into a squint and all your eyelashes kiss.

“I love you,” you say.

He chokes on air. “I know that. I love you, too, but you’re the one who got hurt. You’re the one who’s hurting, why would you ask me how I am? You’re—“ Too good. Too good for me. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Steve.”

You have tears in your eyes and he’s flooded with guilt. He brought it up too soon, he knows. It’s barely over — you need to feel safe, and won’t if he keeps reminding you.

“I’m okay,” he says softly. “How are you feeling, huh?”

“I’m actually starving,” you admit, squishing his cheeks with your hands.

“You want me to go get you something?”

You look down bashfully. “I really need to shower, Steve. You might be blind to my grime but I’m gross right now–”

He kisses you to cut you off, a sharp, saccharine kiss that makes you giggle. “That’s my girlfriend you’re talking about, idiot.”

“Your girlfriend is a creature.”

“A creature!” He uses his weight to push you onto your back, pressing his forehead to yours. “You’re done. You’re done,” he repeats, beaming at your infectious laughter, “you think you can talk about yourself whatever way you like, don’t you? It’s not happening.”

“Okay, I won’t,” you say, your eyes locking with his.

He watches your lips part, feels the rise and fall of your chest under his.

I’m so sorry, he wants to tell you.

You’re finally smiling. He won’t ruin it.

“Thank you,” he says, pulling his lips into a big smile.

It’s easier than he anticipates to smile. You needle your arms over his shoulders and tug him to your chest, your own smile like a brand next to his ear.

“I missed you,” you say. “I know it’s stupid.”

He exhales heavily. “I missed you too.”

#steve zombie!au #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington #stranger things x reader #stranger things fic #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things 4

2K notes · View notes

https-immotmari · 4 months

Text

❝ But I can't help myself when you get close to me ❞ ─── pjsk boys!

WRITER'S STARTER NONSENSE!

first request, yahey!(❁´◡`❁) and I should probably put request open for anyone getting confused if I'm open for requests or not. Also, I don't know if you want romantic or platonic so I'm doing romantic if you don't mind ^^* cute username and pfp btw!

fandom! .project sekai character(s) used! .akito shinonome, toya aoyagi, tsukasa tenma and rui kamishiro gender of reader! .gn!reader head start! .mention of toya's dad🤢

. . .akito shinonome!

dude is perplexed the moment you snake your arms around him. It's like he hasn't been given affection (he's touch-starved)

he should have known the first time he met you, you were as bubbly as bubbles from the powerpuff girls, or even more, and just like that, you've been a daydream and nightmare to him.

back when you two were friends, you kept it minimal such as asking for his permission whenever you want to hug him and even then, akito was, and still is, a flustered mess that it gets to the point that his brain is filled with you and you alone.... okay, maybe a bit of toya but, that's a bit, kay?

now that you two are a thing thanks to an, kohane and toya, you "innocently" used the knowledge you have to make this man a mess. as you should tbh

like, run your fingers through his hair while you're cuddling him, and HE'LL MELT FASTER THAN HE CAN RAP

only in private though, when you two are out in public and you feel the urge of cuddling him there and then, he can shyly give you a side hug for now.

like, poor baby is getting multiple heart attacks whenever you just pop out and immediately attacking him with your cuddly self.

when in private though, you won't waste time in cuddling this man to death, in which he secretly appreciates it, however, can't admit out loud due to his pride and ego.

to be honest, I headcannon him being a human heater when flustered like, you two are just cuddling, you are being your beautiful self and cuddling this man to death while he's just flustered as a boiling kettle. You can even see smoke coming out of his ears.

thanks to being his human heater self, his warmth is only making you want to cuddle him more!

also, thanks to ena and mizuki teasing little bro, he prefers you two cuddling in your house since no so-called annoying older sister and her friend teasing the living daylight out of him.

SMALL SPOON! HE'S FR A SMALL SPOON! he's so touch-starved for your affection, like, after finishing band practice, he rushed to your side and waits for you to have your urge in cuddling him, in which you immediately do it.

though, he still denies being the small spoon since quote-on-quote he's the man of this relationship.

just shut him up by pecking him on the lips and he'll immediately shuts down, use this to your advantage and cuddle him.

. . .toya aoyagi! (my fave<;3)

another touch-starved baby since his father didn't give him enough love till now. L in the comments for toya's dad.

now, unlike your human heater, this guy is your human cooler.

so, whenever the summer hits and you feel like you're getting cooked to a T, just cuddle this guy and you'll feel like you're in the north pole. (merry christmas btw)

baby over here is melting from your cuddles and his gleeful smile and fond chuckles explains it.

I feel like he'll read you a story whenever you two are cuddling on his bed, since this is the only room he can have privacy besides the bathroom, he'll just one hand on the book and the other hand is wrapped around your waist or on your hair, twirling a strand or two.

even though he's fine with public pda, he's still cautious about his actions, his what ifs are like "what if somebody insults them whenever we do this" since toya cares about your feelings very much and he doesn't want your day and your feelings to be ruin by somebody who pokes their noses in other people's business. #stantoyaaoyagi

still, he'll keep an arm around you because toya wouldn't want to make your pretty head thinks he's tired of your cuddles,

it's actually the opposite, he's can never get tired of your affection and you.

though when in private, you can bet this man shows you his touch-starved self.

your cuddles are the medicine to every bad thing happening to him like, that one time where he and his dad got into a serious argument, he would go to your house and cuddle you there. once you open the door and see his rather saddened looked, your arms are already around him, whispering sweet words to him till he feels better.

no words can describe how much he places you above everything, even himself sometimes, baby just grateful to the gods above that he gets another person he can cherished besides his friends.

he was quite shy when you two were new but as time passed, you influenced him with your affection and cuddles, and now look at him, the same cuddly person as you are, maybe even more.

you guys having an unspoken rule on who's giving more cuddles and you damn well when it comes to game, toya aoyagi isn't losing but, he'll make an exception just for you<3

him being small or big spoon depends on his mood that day, like when he's feeling lovely as ever and wants to return every affection you've given him, he'll be the big spoon, especially if you had a bad day. this guy is a good listener and he'll be understanding of the situation. of course, you as well return his affection ^^.

and him being small spoon when him feeling tired after band practice, having a bad day, or whenever he feels like it.

you sometimes tease him about him being your baby and he just blushes, he doesn't deny it since he sometimes admits that he can be quite clingy and cuddly as an infant.

. . .tsukasa tenma!

this dude is ecstatic to have a partner like you (≧∀≦)ゞ

just two sunshines cuddling each other, nothing to see here~

to be honest, he doesn't care if you two are in public or private spaces, just cuddle the man right there and then.

though, if you're shy in public, he'll be understanding after teasing you a bit.

whenever some nosy people give their comments about give singles respect and blah blah blah and if it makes you feel bad about your cuddles, he'll declare war on them. he's a theater blonde, of course he's gonna do that.

it's rare seeing you two separated tbh. like, in school, every student can see you two having your arms around each other, in phoenix wonderland, his band mates, the guests, mascot, AND EVEN MIKU can see you two cuddling each other, even at his or your home!

you two just can't get enough of each other (●ˇ∀ˇ●)

though, whenever he's needed somewhere while he was cuddling with you, he'll whine before carrying you. he'll bring you everywhere since he needs his darling co-star to refill his energy whenever he feels tired.

his band mates just shake their heads and let their leader do whatever he wants.

tsukasa has the tendencies to squeeze you, he sometimes thinks you can squeak whenever he does that like a stuff toy he had when he was younger that he used to cuddle in his sleep.

though, speaking of family, his family especially saki adores you!

for saki, she's happy that her older brother has a partner like you since he always tires himself out just for her so it's wonderful seeing his brother having someone cuddly as you.

he flexes you to others. like, "look at my beloved starling! aren't they the cutest thing your eyes have ever seen?" and it's a picture of you sleeping while cuddling him and the person is just "huh?"

he flexes you as if you're a trophy or a great achievement in which you are.

it honestly relaxes him whenever you cuddle him, especially when it's such a peaceful day and without rui's inventions blowing him up. just you and him, in his bed, cuddling each other in peace while you two tell each other about your days and how it's been doing.

he cherished those moments with you, and nothing can replace those moments even when it's something expensive as gold.

like toya, him being small or big soon depends on his mood. if he wants to be pampered by you and your affection then he'll be the small spoon but, if he wants to return those pampering from you then he'll be the big spoon and pamper you! it's a win-win situation.

you make his heart go crazy, as well as his mind, that he made a play dedicated to you and you only.

. . .rui kamishiro!

aye! you like cuddles, he likes them as well! after some reassurance from you that is

from the start of your guys' relationship, he was not sure about being touchy with you but once you accepted him in those warm arms of yours, he's in.

like tsukasa, he doesn't care if you two are in public or private but, if you're too shy in public, he'll just give you a teasing cat smile and just gives wraps an arm around you all the while teasing you.

it ain't rui kamishiro without him teasing you at least 10 times a day.

you know those two faces/personality octopus plushies? the ones where each side has a different expression of the octopus plushie, you two have those but quite different from the normal ones, thanks to mizuki's help, he made two plushies for the two of you. one of the sides of the octopus plushie has a '^^' expression while the other side said, 'I'm having the urge to cuddle you rn'.

so, whenever you want to cuddle this man and you're too shy to say it, just flip the octopus plushie and he'll understand. I can imagine him being the big spoon cuddling you while both of your octopus plushies are on top of your guys' head, having the "^^" expression on them.

it's so cute that it'll give other cavities q(≧▽≦q)

just like his leader, direct over here will carry you everywhere just for the dose of his daily cuddles. he can either carry you bridal style, on his back, or maybe on his shoulders if he's feeling very teasing at that moment.

surprised attack cuddles!

you'll have to make a perfect plan to catch him off guard since he's always on guard due to you doing your surprised attack cuddles very often.

but, once you did catch him off guard with your surprised attack cuddles, he'll simply chuckles and say "such a sly partner I have~" but if you squint, you can see his cheeks being painted with the beautiful colour of red.

yes, rui kamishiro can be flustered, you just have to work hard on it.

sometimes nene just third wheel you two while you two cuddle and she's just playing her game, she doesn't feel bothered by it since she's grown used to the two of you being like this, i mean, she was the one who helped along in setting you two up.

if he was a cat, he would purr in your embrace. little kamishiro just can't get enough of you and it shows.

you're as cuddly as a teddy bear if he were to describe you. whatever occasion the world has, you two simply cuddle each other like every other day yet rui feels like he's on cloud nine.

he's mostly the big spoon when it comes to cuddles since he wants to just have you laying on his chest while he ruffles your hair, something peaceful he needed in his rather chaotic life.

however, if you want to be the big spoon this time, he'll reluctantly agree, after teasing you of course, and be the one being pampered by you.

every picture of you in his phone is you cuddling on him, and he cherishes those pictures, two of the pictures are set as his wallpaper in home and lock screen.

he just can't wait to get home after practice so you can attack him with those cuddles of yours (/≧▽≦)/

WRITER'S ENDING NONSENSE!

my goodness I feel like some sort of creature possessed me and gave me motivation for this! Hope this tale satisfied you, @hearts4saki! ヾ(≧▽≦*)o

rules! + masterlist!

#❝ Dream that I can never have again ❞ ─── mari's tales #project sekai x reader #toya aoyagi #toya aoyagi x reader #pjsk x reader #akito shinonome #akito shinonome x reader #rui kamishiro #rui kamishiro x reader #tsukasa tenma #tsukasa tenma x reader #xreader

276 notes · View notes

strawberry-cowmilk · 1 year

Note

Reaction to mc saying she's pregnant? Like they had NO idea. It's their child, maybe she hide it with magic or something and they generally couldn't tell, if that is okay! It's okay if not,

I just think it's a cute conecpt, like just pretend barbs doesn't look into the future,

Again it's okay is not! No pressure,

Wolf !

Hi, wolf! Of course it's okay! I hope you like it

they find out mc is pregnant after hiding it

-> brothers and side characters x mc (no luke)

mc's gender is not mentioned, but is pregnant, not proof read (somebody lmk if the tag is wrong)

content warnings: pregnancy, mild angst

-----

Lucifer

he's a little offended (??) hurt (??) that you hid it from him, were you afraid of his reaction or was he scary?

regardless, lucifer loves both you and the child to death from the moment he finds out they exist

he's going to take great care of you (though he might come off as a little overprotective)

if you are standing up for a minute too long he will let you sit down

Mammon

oh no, you were play fighting just yesterday, did he accidentally hurt you or the baby?

when those worries ebb away, mammon is so happy he's telling everyone at rad about it

yes he's sad you hid it for a long time but the happiness is way stronger than the hurt

'mc I'm gonna go to the mall to get baby's first gold bar' 'mammon the baby isn't even born yet-'

Leviathan

of course you hid it for a long time, imagine you're the child and you find out your dad is a gross otaku

you're gonna have to calm him down

it takes levi a while to warm up to the idea, but when he does he's really excited for his baby

he's going to want to read tsl to your stomach as a bedtime story (if the baby is a boy he wants to name him henry too)

Satan

satan is kind of in denial, if you were pregnant he would have known right? why didn't you say something?

he's never thought about being a father, he needs a moment to let it sink and do research on babies

but he warms up to the idea eventually, and he'll be the softest you've ever seen

satan got little children's books and those cute music boxes for when the baby comes

Asmodeus

out of everyone, asmo would me the most upset you tried to hide it

but he loves you and the baby so he forgives you soon

asmo might not know how to be a father at first, but he's willing to learn and raise the baby with you

plus he's going to want one of those maternity photoshoots, but if you don't it's okay

Beelzebub

yes he's not happy you kept it from him but baby :))

beel would do anything to make you and them happy

he's really worried you're going to get hurt though, if you're cooking together beel does not let you pick up a spatula or get close to the stove

also beel loves to hug your stomach, it's basically what he does every night now

Belphegor

he's not happy about it at first because he honestly did not want a child

but seeing you pregnant, realising you'd make a great parent, it changed his mind

belphie gets the best pillows and blankets so you can be comfortable while sleeping

if the baby is keeping you awake belphie will try to calm them down

Diavolo

he understands why you hid it from him, imagine getting pregnant with the demon prince's child- oh no are you scared?

it doesn't matter whether you are actually scared or not, diavolo will take his time to show you all is well, he's really happy to welcome his child

he took a picture of you and your cute baby bump, made it his ddd wallpaper and stares at it when he doesn't want to work

Barbatos

it took him by surprise, but barbatos can adapt quickly

he's really happy to be having a baby with you, he's ready to give you anything you need to make the pregnancy easier

do you want tea, a massage or something else? barbatos has got you

he can't wait to meet his baby, he doesn't want to use his powers and spoil it for himself

Simeon

...so that's why you could eat solomon's soup last week without getting sick

he forgives you for hiding it, surely you had a good reason

simeon loves the baby so much he sings lullabies he used to sing to luke for them already, this man's face physically softens every time he sees the baby bump

but really, maybe you should stay away from food that randomly appears in the fridge that simeon didn't make

Solomon

he's a little upset but that's okay, in all his years he's never felt this happy

he can't wait to hold his little baby for the first time

being a human too, solomon knows plenty of stuff about human pregnancy so that's great

'simeon why are you stopping me I'm just going to offer mc a sandwich I made'

2K notes · View notes

renjunphile · 1 year

Text

if my wishes came true, it would have been you | mark lee

PAIRING ✧ nct's mark lee x female reader WORD COUNT ✧ 12.0k TAGS ✧ idol!mark x idol!reader, exes!au, exes to lovers!au, really quite angsty, happy ending, fluff, non-linear narrative

PLAYLIST aka SONGS BY YN ✧ the 1 by taylor swift ; 21 by gracie abrams ; i miss you, i'm sorry by gracie abrams ; champagne problems by taylor swift ; in between by gracie ambrams ; somebody by hwasa and loco ; i know it won't work by gracie abrams, dancing with our hands tied (acoustic) by taylor swift

SUMMARY ✧ persist and resist the temptation to ask if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? (alternatively, every single time you and mark get a chance to talk about your breakup, it never goes as planned)

MAY 2021

"NCT are here."

You hum along to the track blasting in your left ear through the singular airpod. It's the first day of your comeback promotions, and while you should feel confident from the many months you'd practiced the song every single day for multiple hours, no amount of time could ever erase the nerves you feel each comeback day.

You're already finished with your hair and makeup, being the first to sit in the chair to give your members some time to wake up from their naps in the van. Though you should all be bright, awake, and preppy for your comeback stage, the reality was that all of you were obliteratingly tired from the near all-nighter in the practice room. Your makeup artists are true magicians for the way they cover up all signs of tiredness even under all those harsh, bright stage lights.

"Unnie, did you hear me?" your youngest member Kali poked your arm incessantly.

"Kali, stop," you whine, pushing her finger away, "I heard you."

"So why didn't you react?"

"Why should I?" you sigh, pausing the track on your phone.

She pauses for a while, choosing to craft her words before replying too hastily, "We should still go and say hi. Haechan is asking if we wanna film a TikTok with them."

"You know they only post with SM idols," you remind her.

"You were in SM too. It's just for fun," she mumbles, "You know how many idols feature on Haechan's private account. Please come."

"You're up to no good, Kali," you squint at her suspiciously, watching the room carefully to see if anyone had overheard. It wasn't really a big deal; all your managers were well-informed, just like your members, and your stylists were basically your friends.

"I already talked to our manager and Haechan talked to their manager," Kali wrapped her fingers around your wrist delicately, but pulling to encourage you to stand up, "Let's go."

The walk to the hallway where the NCT members agreed to meet the two of you wasn't exactly a long one, but the rumblings of nerves bubbling in your stomach made it feel like a million years. You weren't stupid; you knew exactly what to expect and you wouldn't put it past your maknae to meddle in a time like this.

"Oh look, they're here already," Kali was biting a grin behind her words as 3 figures came into view. Haechan gives you a warm smile and a famous bear hug before he was shoved away.

"Noona," you resist a pout as one of the boys you had been taking care of since you were younger wrapped you up in a big hug, "Haven't seen you in so long. Missed you."

"Missed you too Ji. You grow an inch every time I see you," you also resist the urge to ruffle up his perfectly styled purple hair out of fear of getting hunted by his hair stylist, "I like this purple on you."

He gives you an appreciative grin and somehow you still see him as the tiny, shy boy running energetically around the halls of the company building after being chased by his fellow trainees. Jisung moves on to greet your member, who was still in conversation with Haechan.

It's definitely not that you dread having to face Mark Lee. It's totally not the fact that he's your ex-boyfriend. Or the fact that you're still in love with him. Or the fact that he's still in love with you. No, none of that.

Totally.

"You look really pretty, Y/N," he begins slowly, taking in your appearance in front of him, having not seen each other for a few months.

Mark Lee stands in front of you stoic, hands by his side and feet together. It's almost like he's fighting his instinct to wrap you up in his arms like he's done most of his life because you sure know you're having to fight that instinct too.

"Thanks, Mark. I like your blue hair," you smile softly, "How are you?"

"I'm good. Amazing, even. I guess," he's mumbling, running his hands through said hair you just complimented and you can tell he's nervous, "I love the song. And the whole album. I can tell which songs you wrote. You always make me so proud."

Ouch. It stings your heart whenever he says things like that. How could you have let go of someone so sweet?

"Thanks. Congratulations on your first album and coming back with Dream."

"Ah, thanks. I fought so hard to come back to the group and I'm really happy they finally listened to me," he began, "You know how much I love them."

"Yeah, I know."

You're barely meeting his eyes, but when you do, it feels like he's hesitating in his words.

"Mark-"

"Happy birthday by the way," he rushes out, "For yesterday. I'm sorry that I didn't text. Or call."

"It's okay," you reassure him, knowing that that was probably easier for you both that he didn't.

"How did you spend your birthday?"

"The members got me cake. Coffee, my favourite," you recount, "I did a live for a bit, but other than that we were practicing all day for today."

"Oh, I'm sorry. That really sucks," he frowns.

"You know how it goes. I'll have more birthdays to celebrate anyway-"

"But you didn't celebrate last year either!" he protests.

"Maybe next year, then," you pull your lips into a tight smile, "It's okay Mark. Don't worry about it. I'm not really fond of my birthdays anymore and 22's not a big deal."

He sighs while looking at you, "You deserve to celebrate your birthday no matter what. I hope you can find some time to do something for yourself."

You chuckle lightly, "That'll be hard to come by. I don't know how you've done it with multiple groups all these years, Mark. I've only been debuted for three years and it's never got any easier. You were really stretching yourself thin, huh?"

"I guess," he's playing with his fingers, so you know he has something to say.

"Just say it, Mark. Whatever you want to say."

You can read him like a book and you've always been able to. It's not your fault that the book is wide open, as compared to the way you've always been- shut, bound, and locked.

"I just wanted to say I miss you. That's all. I just wanted to see how you were doing."

Thanks to the secluded hallway that Haechan had found and led you to, the coast was clear enough for you to close the distance between you and Mark even just by a bit more. His breath hitches as you place a hand on his arm.

"Thanks for caring, Mark. I miss you too."

He smiles at you softly and the two of you are so engrossed in each other to notice that Kali, Haechan and Jisung had disappeared a while ago. You know it's time for you to go back though.

The worst part of the whole situation wasn't the breakup itself. Of course, the breakup hurt both of you for a long time and you don't even think you're recovered. It did happen over a year ago, but that wasn't the worst part.

The worst part is knowing that every time you meet again, walking away hurts more each time. It's the fact that there's nothing you can do but listen to your heart break with each step you take away from each other. It's the fact that there's nothing you can do about the fact that you still love each other more than anything else in this world.

2014

Mark Lee was known to be SM's golden child. In the future, he'd be known as the most over-worked in the company, due to his talents and resilience, but now, he's just Mark Lee, second to you.

You'd done everything before Mark. You were born first. You moved to Korea first. You beat him joining the company by 6 months and you beat him getting announced as part of SM Rookies just by 7 days.

None of that mattered because it was always just you and him together, wherever. Sure, you trained and practiced separately, but lunchtimes, downtimes, company gatherings- it was always the two of you attached to the hip. There was really nothing the company could say- the two of you were barely 15 so what was the worst you could do?

"How long do you think it'll be before your debut?" the two of you are lying down on the grass in a park a few minutes away from the building. His hands are rifling through the blades, yanking them up every so often, while you made daisy chains quietly.

He hums in response, "I don't know. Soon I hope, but I've only been here for like just over a year. Realistically, I'd say like 2 years. Don't tell anyone I told you, but I heard Johnny hyung talking to the manager about some kind of project that the company has been thinking of for a while. Something about having a group with infinite members!"

Your eyes widened at the thought, "Wow, really? EXO debuted with 12 and I thought that was a lot!"

"Yeah, right? But there are only like 9 of us in SM Rookies right now. How many do you think they'll start with and how am I going to get lines in a song if there's so many of us?"

You nudge him, "Well, with your awesome talent and writing skills of course. I can't wait to see what ends up happening to you guys- oh yeah, by the way, how's that new trainee you guys are training with? Donghyuck, right?"

"New?" he sat up with wide eyes, twisting his body to look at you, "He's been here for like 5 months and it's been the worst 5 months of my life! He's just so infuriating. His voice is amazing, sure, but he never listens and is always talking and hanging off me! I told him that he makes me want to leave the company."

You laugh at his frustrated expression, "Ha, you'd never leave the company. You'd never leave me behind. Plus, I bet you'll be best friends in a few years. Opposites attract and all that."

"Hm, but you and I are quite similar. Don't you think?"

There were definitely some traits that you shared to both be enduring the same path. Resilient, hard-working, brave, and enduring were all ones. After all, it's a big leap of faith to train to have the chance to be an idol just at 12 or 13 with no guaranteed future.

When it came down to it though, you'd like to think that there were also traits you each had that weren't always necessarily opposites all the time, but traits that complemented each other.

Mark liked to talk; you liked to listen. Mark was optimistic and would always be the one to cheer you up on your particularly moody days. You were Mark's calm through it all. Mark loved to rap; you found your passion in singing. Mark liked carrots and would take them off your plate in the cafeteria and swap them with his peas. Mark's hands were calloused from his guitar-playing, while yours were smooth and soft when he held them.

"No, I think we're the perfect example of opposites attract."

"Well then that's why you're my best friend," he grinned over at you while you slid a daisy chain bracelet onto his wrists, "Forever and whenever."

"Always," you grinned.

AUGUST 2021

"What are you doing here?"

"No happy birthday Mark?" he teases, holding a bouquet of flowers and a grocery store plastic bag in his hands on your doorstep.

"Come in before anyone sees you," you pull him inside your dorm, sticking your head out the hallway to see if it was empty, "How did you get here?"

"Relax, Y/N. My manager drove me and I was in all this," he pulls out a mask and a beanie from his pocket to show you.

"Oh, good. Happy birthday, I guess, but what are you doing here?" you question him again, looking at the contents in his grasp.

"Well, it all started when Hyuck said that we were throwing a birthday party for me. Then Jisung invited Kali and obviously, you too. And your members, of course. Then you said you couldn't come because you're busy," his eyes dart to the episode of Modern Family on your TV and the blanket lazily thrown on the couch, combined with your pajamas, "So I didn't want to come to the party anymore."

"But all my members are at your dorm," you frown, "There's still a party?"

"Yeah, I guess. Gives Jisung an opportunity to spend more time with his crush, which I'm sure Kali appreciates."

"So they're hosting your birthday party," you hum, "Without you? And you came here to what? Check that I'm busy?"

"I know you're not busy. Erin told me so, which I suspected anyway. I know it's kind of rude for me to come to force you to spend time with me when you didn't even want to come to my birthday party in the first place, but I thought I would try." he shrugs, "Is that okay?"

Mark is adorned in a white T-shirt and grey joggers. He's clearly not dressed for a party and your member clearly told him that you're staying inside and moping to your comfort show while you try to avoid your ex-boyfriend on his birthday. Plan failed, you guess.

Here's the thing: you've always been the worst at saying no to Mark. The one time you did, the world crashed around you. You would've thought it would have got easier to say no to him after already experiencing the worst-case scenario, but looking into his slightly pleading chocolate eyes shows you otherwise.

"Of course, Mark. You're the birthday boy," you finally say after a period of silence where Mark felt like his heart was thumping out of his chest.

"There's no one else I'd rather spend my birthday with," he hums lightly, even though his words are loaded, "Here, a big bouquet for missing last year too."

The tradition started on his 15th birthday in 2014. Even though it was his birthday, he had got you a bouquet of flowers to thank you for being his best friend of one year and making him feel all the more comfortable in his first year in Korea. You were his dance partner, his classmate, his fellow English speaker, and his best friend. He got you flowers again the next year, then the year after, and again and again for being his partner through everything.

The last birthday you shared with Mark before the two of you broke up was his 20th birthday in 2019 and he had prepared his own bouquet that year, choosing all your favourite flowers and colours and wrapping it all up himself. Mark was selfless like that- thinking of other people even on his birthday.

"It's beautiful," you examine the flowers- pink and red camellias and carnations, white primroses, pink peonies, red roses and baby's breaths. Taking that flower language course with Mark back when you were both 17 comes as a regret now, with the messages he's sending you through the bouquet. You hope it's just a coincidence.

"Anyway, I brought us- or I made my manager buy us- some Oreo ice cream, peanut butter chocolate, some ramen, and chicken and mushroom pastries," he grins as he pulls each one out of the bag, "And I brought cake, obviously."

You hold yourself back from saying what you would say every time he presented your favourite pastry from your childhood home to you- 'you know the way to my heart'.

"I haven't had one in so long," you gasp, taking it from him and preparing your plate already, "Thanks Mark. Why are you so considerate on your own birthday?"

"I like to celebrate the people I love on my birthday too. I wouldn't be me without them," he plops himself on the bar stool at your breakfast bar while you sigh hopelessly. He'll never leave your heart alone, "I wanted to soften the blow too."

You turn to him slowly, "Soften the blow?"

He sees the panic in your eyes and lets out that melodious laugh you've always loved, "Oh, nothing like that. Nothing to tell you. I just wanted to bribe you to talk to me on my birthday. I thought after over a year you might be ready to talk?"

"About what?"

"Us."

You thank the manufacturers of the heavenly pastry slice that only takes 90 seconds in the microwave. You set the plate down in front of Mark and take the seat next to him.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Are you still my best friend?"

"Mark, come on," you began warily, knowing the difficult conversation you were about to have.

He meets your eyes and you feel the pain reflected in them, "When we decided to give our relationship a try when we were 16, we pinky swore that no matter what happens, we'll always be best friends. Always. Right?"

You find the power to break his gaze and stare down to your hands on your lap, "We did."

"So, why can't we go back to being friends? I know, I know when you broke up with me, you said that you don't think we could stay friends. I understood, of course, and I wanted to give you some space. Well, at least initially, but it's been over a year now and I really miss us. Your friendship meant everything to me even if I can't have you as my girlfriend." his tone is heartbreaking in the way that it's vulnerable and pleading.

"I told you when we broke up that breaking up was the hardest choice I'd ever have to make. It blew the choice to leave SM out of the water. I didn't want to break up, but it felt like I had no choice," you explained slowly, "When we first started dating, I knew I already loved you, but growing up together and debuting and going through everything I went through really taught me what real love in real life looked like and I could never have predicted at 16 how I felt for you at 20. Mark, you're everything to me, I hope you know. I said I didn't want to be friends when we broke up because how could I have lived with myself seeing you and talking to you still knowing I had you in the way that I did and knowing I loved you that intensely but not being able to show it anymore? How could I live with myself still having you around knowing I let go of the greatest thing that's ever happened to me?"

Mark Lee was brave at 16 when he kissed you for the first time and asked you to be his girlfriend against all the bans and rules. Mark Lee was brave at 18 watching you walk away from everything you both knew at SM Entertainment and for not running after you to stop you because you both knew it was for the best. Mark Lee was brave at 20 hearing you sob through the phone while you were halfway around the world because you just couldn't do this anymore. Mark Lee is brave at 22, taking your warm hands in his, and Mark Lee is brave when he lifts your chin up to meet his gaze and asks you this:

"Why can't we just get back together? This year apart is hurting us more than it's benefitting us."

People say that the eyes are the windows to the soul- that the eyes say everything someone can't say. Your eyes are filled with tears, yes, but also love and fear and all the emotions in between.

The problem was that your brain always rules your life, keeping your heart's true desires always suppressed deep within.

"Mark," you trail, before he cuts you off.

"I don't see the problem, Y/N. Both our companies knew we were dating and you're not a rookie in the industry anymore. I mean, we dated through your whole rookie era! I acknowledge everything you said and felt when we broke up and I wanted to give you time to work through those emotions, but I'm asking if anything has changed. Has it?"

"I've never stopped loving you, but I'm still scared Mark. I'm even more scared now as your career grows," you say quietly, "I don't want to hurt you. If anything gets out, it won't just hurt you or me, because I could take it if it only hurt me, but it's our members, Mark. You know how fans feel about idols who date and it's never ever as simple as 'if they're a true fan they'll be happy for me'. That's not how the industry works."

He squeezes your hands, "Then we'll get better at sneaking around! You know the boys love you so much and they know how much our relationship meant to me and they'd never ever get in the way of that. Or we can just text and call and I don't even have to see you in person when it's risky. I just want the chance to tell you that I still love you every single day as I promised."

There it is again, the sound of your heart breaking at the most loving boy on the planet.

"Will you let me think about it? At least about being your best friend still? I'm sorry that I can't give you an answer right now on your birthday," you murmur. The confessions from Mark came as no surprise, but he never fails to leave you speechless with no clear thoughts in your brain and your heart always full.

"I'm just asking for a chance. Just for anything you can give me," he smiles finally, "How about we eat all this and continue your Modern Family? It's still my favourite show, so I couldn't dream of a better way to spend my birthday."

"I'd like that."

2015

"I'm debuting," Mark barges into the near-empty practice room, huffing and panting like he just ran a marathon, "Y/N, oh my God!"

You're sat cross-legged on the floor with your phone propped up in front of you. Your eyebrows are stitched together tightly, indicating that you were probably either criticising yourself on a recording or trying to learn a choreography. The moment you realise that it's Mark, your whole body unclenches and you relax as you pause the video. You don't comprehend the weight of his words until he says them again.

"Y/N, Y/N, I'm going to debut!" he's practically screaming in joy as he belly slides towards you and crashes into you, wrapping his arms around you.

"Oh my God, Mark! Really? Tell me everything right now!" you squeeze him back, pride bursting in your chest.

When you both joined SM, you came with the obvious dream of being an idol entertainer. Sure, the company can make all these empty promises to you at the start, but with the way the industry works, nothing is really ever truly for certain. For you, the company had not given you any time scale or idea of what direction they wanted you to go in. You weren't even really that hopeful, considering the company just debuted Red Velvet one year ago, but you were still enduring.

However, it was almost time to debut a new boy group since it had been 3 years and counting since EXO broke into the scene. You were always certain that Mark was always a part of that plan.

"So, do you remember last year when I told you about the infinite boy group idea? It was true! The company gathered all the male trainees and showed them their idea- it's called NCT and it's so cool, trust me! So it's like they're going to debut groups within NCT like different members in each group!"

"Mark, that sounds amazing. Which group are you going to be in?"

"Uh, they said all of them?" Mark frowns in confusion, "Like the first is going to be this unit where members can switch out anytime and it only has a comeback whenever it wants to, and then the second one is like a normal permanent group which I think I'll be with Hyuck and the hyungs, and the third one is a group where we graduate once we hit 20! But I don't think that one's fully confirmed with members yet."

He's running out of breath explaining it to you and his eyes are going crazy so you just laugh and hug tighter, "That's a lot of information, but it still sounds amazing. See Mark, I told you that you're going to be the most important person in this building! You're literally the best."

Mark nudges you so that you break away, "Psh, shut up Y/N. It's still a few months out anyway. We're going to be writing and practicing the debut song for the first unit really soon though."

"And I'm so proud of you," you tell him sincerely, knowing that there are not many people who you can say have worked harder than Mark to achieve their dreams, "Do you feel scared at all?"

He swivels his body so that he's sitting in front of you and he starts playing with your fingers like he always does, "Naturally, I guess. Debuting is a whole new world and being an idol too, but this is what I've been working towards so why shouldn't I be more excited? I've been waiting for this day, but I guess it's human nature to have fear of the unknown."

"It's definitely not wrong to not be scared. I'd be over the moon if they finally tell me I'm going to debut," you sigh dreamily.

"And you will! They can't keep you hidden here any longer and you know that the company loves you so much! You've given everything for them so you deserve it all back," Mark is now rubbing circles with his thumb on the back of your hand, "I can't wait until we achieve our dream together. No matter how long it takes, we'll both be standing on that stage together as idols. It's so close now, Y/N."

You smile softly at the boy, ever the optimist, "I can't wait for it too, Mark. Don't let the fame get to your head so quickly and don't forget me when you're famous okay?"

"You're so silly," Mark laughs, "You'll always be my best friend- wait scratch that-"

"I won't always be your best friend?"

"No! You will! But this is literally the best day ever and I have all this adrenaline and energy right now and if I don't say it now, I don't think I ever will, but all I'm saying is that I've been by your side for nearly 3 years now and you're literally my other half and it's so goddamn obvious that I like you so much and I really want to be your boyfriend. Okay, exhale Mark."

Your eyes widen at his confession and you slide away from him in shock, "Wait, really? You like me? You want to be my boyfriend?"

He looks at you like you just grew two heads, "Y/N, that's literally exactly what I said. Do you like me back?"

Shyness begins to creep out of you while your whole face flushes red. You've never been the type to be shy around Mark, even in the times his words and actions make you feel giddy.

"Mhm, you're my first real crush that developed when we met. I thought I'd grow out of it, but it kept getting stronger the closer we got," you admit.

The first day that Mark Lee walked into the practice rooms and got introduced to the trainees, you thought he was the cutest boy in the world. He was dorky and shy at first, but when he performed in front of you, he turned into a completely different person that made you fall for him even more.

The two of you were the same age and he was your deskmate in Korean lessons. Though Mark had grown up speaking Korean, he had never lived in Korea speaking it almost 100% of the time, so the company thought it would be good for him to join your lessons, especially to get training for the language he would be using as an idol.

The two of you became very fast friends and by the end of the month, you were chasing each other in the cafeteria and sharing food in corners with your own inside jokes.

His face breaks out into a grin, tackling you into a hug, "Aw, my little Y/N likes me back!"

You roll your eyes playfully and shove him off your body, "First of all, I'm 3 months older than you, and second of all, you have been spending way too much time with Donghyuck."

"Yeah that little devil rubs off on people," he sighs, "Whatever. Does that mean we're boyfriend and girlfriend now?"

"Wait, wait, wait. We have to consider the implications! Especially if you're debuting soon! Are we going to tell the company? How is this going to work?" you bombard him with questions, playing your part as the realist in this friendship, "Is this a good idea."

"I mean, half the hyungs have secret girlfriends so we can ask them for help and at least it helps that you're in the company with me so if they do find out it's easier to protect the both of us," Mark replies, "I've actually spent a lot of time thinking about this, believe it or not. You keep me up awake at night sometimes."

"You're so cheesy," you mumble, turning away to hide your blushing face, "But I guess I do want to be your girlfriend- but what if we break up? I don't want to lose you as my best friend!"

"How about this then," he extends his pinky out to you, "Let's pinky swear that even if we break up and this relationship goes horribly wrong, we'll be best friends still. Forever and whenever."

His words are dripping with sincerity and it surrounds you like a blanket. There's no one in this world that you trust more than Mark Lee when you entwine your own pink around his and smile at him, "Always."

Your pinkies are still attached a minute later when he's looking at you with a goofy smile.

You glare at him, "What's going on in that big head of yours?"

"If we're dating, then does that mean I can kiss you?"

The thought of kissing Mark had admittedly crossed your mind more than you could bare to say out loud. You wanted to play it off cool- shove him and roll your eyes or something, but truthfully, you really did want to kiss your dorky best friend Mark Lee.

"I mean, I guess," you shrug, "If you want to."

"Ha ha, I do," he starts leaning in closer and your heart is beating faster.

This was it. You were going to kiss your best friend-turned-boyfriend in the middle of a practice room. He was going to be your first kiss too!

Mark's face is so close that you can feel his breath on your lips. You can tell he's never done this before with how slowly and nervously he's advancing, but you can see the hope in his eyes.

Your eyes flutter shut. Your lips are almost touching, just ghosting over each others.

"Wait!" you groan as he opens his mouth, "If I'm your first real crush, then who's your first crush overall?"

You smirk, "Jongin-oppa. Duh."

2022

This was the biggest concert of your career. Playing the Olympic Stadium had always just been a distant daydream - something to dream about just to amuse you or occupy time. You'd never thought that you would actually live to see the day when that dream came to fruition.

It wasn't even a realistic dream. No girl groups had ever played their own concert at Jamsil Olympic Stadium, but your group was going to be the first.

Cameras were pointed all around you backstage as you prepared to go on for your opening.

"Leader, give us a pep talk," your bandmate Yana whines while nudging you. You gather in a circle, pretending you're not deafened by the noise of your fans screaming just past the partition, where they're waiting in anticipation.

The 5 of you lean closer, putting your heads together and your hands in the middle. Before that, you make sure to look at their faces carefully and examine each member's expressions.

Jian is a year older than you, but she's nervous as hell and can barely get any words out. You're not worried because she's proven time after time that she's born to be on stage and that she completely transforms in front of an audience showering her in love. Yana seems nervous too, but she's better at hiding it and it comes out through rambles of sometimes unintelligible speech. Erin is gripping her microphone tightly with a poker face, probably recalling all of her raps in her head quickly, even though you know it comes second nature to her. Your youngest, Kali, seems the most excited. That kid is the most fearless idol you've ever met and you're grateful for someone like her on the team.

As for you? Well, you're a mix of all of your members. It's coming up to a decade now since you started training and you still have to take everything that this career throws at you one by one. The feeling backstage is not exactly overwhelming- it's more pride and joy and excitement to be out there and perform the best concert you have to give.

"No one can ever take this away from us. We're the first freaking girl group to host a show here! We've worked so hard for this and we absolutely deserve it. Everyone out there is here for us, so we should give it our all and play the best show ever. Don't let your nerves get to you. Just relax and be the amazing and talented performers I know we all are," you breathe out, "I'm really thankful for you guys and I'm so happy to have you by my side with me for this. We're exactly where we should be. I really love you guys so much. Let's kill it, yeah? 3, 2, 1, Fighting!"

Your members release a chuckle and you all wrap your arms around each other in a group hug. Soon, your cues begin in your in-ear monitors and you break up to take your positions on the platform that will lift you up to the stage.

The concert starts off without a hitch. Everything is perfect and the energy you get as each song progresses is nothing like you've ever felt. The sea of fans is expansive and blinding and you still have to check you're not dreaming every few moments. You eventually settle into the stage and the concert slows down a bit with your solo performances.

Your company had encouraged you all to perform something of your own choosing and while you had a vast repertoire of songs tucked away on your GarageBand, they were mostly unfinished, too personal or waiting to be adapted to your group to go onto your future albums. The song had to be something that would only ever be just for you, but something you could bare to release into the world for everyone else to hear.

Okay, so maybe you let your emotions rule you and get the best of you. Maybe the song you chose was the wrong one to invite your fans to insert themselves into. Maybe it was too personal to sing a song about Mark Lee in front of the biggest crowd you'd ever played in your life, but when else could you?

The baby grand piano is gleaming in the centre of the stage and your blue dress is sparkling from the way the lights hit the crystals adorning the whole slip. You're admittedly more nervous about this, but you think it's more to do with the fact that you know Mark Lee is in the stadium, somewhere.

Your company had warned you that if you wanted to sing this song, you had to do a little speech before that would throw them off your scent, "Hi guys," you pause for their screams, "I know you guys enjoyed Kali's energetic dance and Jian's amazing original song! For my segment, I thought we could have a little chill time and not to dampen your spirits, but I wanted to show you guys this heartbreak track that I wrote after watching too many sad rom-coms. I really hope that none of you guys can relate and if anyone ever breaks your heart, just send them my way, okay? I hope you guys enjoy it. This is '21'."

You let out a deep breath and remind yourself that this was the right choice. Your fingers glide over the keys perfectly like it's muscle memory from the year you've been working on the song. You send a prayer to higher beings that Mark won't kill you as you begin the first lines.

"I missed your 21st birthday. I've been up at home; almost tried to call you, don't know if I should. Hate to picture you half-drunk, happy. Hate to think you went out without me. I'm sorry if you blame me, if I were you I would. Thought you'd see it coming, but you never could. I still haven't heard from your family, but you said your mom always loved me."

Mark celebrated your 21st birthday with you. Public dates were not a thing in your relationship, but this man made every effort to make the best out of your situation. He kicked out your members from your dorm after enlisting their help to decorate the place top to bottom in rose gold banners and balloons. After taking cooking lessons for weeks previously, he had then covered your dining table with expensive cloth and filled up two glasses with wine to go with the steak that he had perfectly cooked all for you. He then took you to the couch and serenaded you with a love song about how much you mean to him and how thankful he was for you. On top of all that, you had boxes and boxes of presents to unwrap that were all thoughtful, beautiful, or meaningful. Mark Lee was the perfect boyfriend.

For Mark's 21st birthday, you were sat cross-legged on your sofa with your phone placed on the table in front of you, face up. It was as if you were waiting for him to be the one to call when you were the one who broke his heart just a few weeks earlier and asked to not be friends.

You were drinking the wine that he poured for you on your birthday and you were half-drunk, punching in his number on your keypad, because even though you deleted his number, you already knew it off by heart. There was just something in you that refused to carry it through. You were a coward and Mark Lee celebrated his birthday without you for the first time in 7 years.

"I see the look in your eye and I'm biting my tongue. You were the love of my life since I was young. When the night is over, don't call me up I'm already under. I get a little bit alone sometimes and I miss you again. I'll be the love of your life inside your head. When the night is over, don't call me up I'm already under."

Later on that night, you're lying wide awake and staring up at the glow-in-the-dark stars that you and Mark had decided to plaster all around your ceiling when you were bored one day. The crowd seemed to love the song thankfully and it was easy to get their energy back up. People placed meaning into everything idols did, so you weren't surprised at the people who were making guesses about your love life and the subject of the song. Whatever, they'd never get it right, anyway.

Your phone ringing cuts through the silence and you curse, hoping it won't wake up the other girls in the dorm. They're probably dead asleep from the high-energy concert anyway.

"You're still up?" his voice is grainy through the speaker.

"You're the one that called. Did you not want me to answer?" you quip back, "It's the adrenaline, I think."

"Touché. I was going to leave a voicemail, but this is better, I guess," Mark uttered, "The concert was amazing, by the way. I'm sorry we didn't come and say hello backstage, but we really enjoyed it."

"Thanks, Mark and thank the boys for me too, okay?" you instruct.

"Mhmm, of course," he replies, "That song you wrote was good, you know. But you might've as well called it 'Mark'."

You're laughing softly at his comment, "I should've changed the number, I know. But shut up- if you know it's for you, then why don't you follow my words? I said don't call me tonight."

"I've never been good at following rules when it comes to you," Mark sighs, "Plus, there's not a lot of times I can just call you up like this. At least I had something to say to you."

"You can always call if you want."

"Would you always answer?"

You pause to think, but Mark takes that as confirmation.

"Have you thought about what I said? 6 months ago when I asked if you wanted to be friends again? Or even get back together?"

"That question keeps me awake every night," you joke, "But today, when I was just looking out at the fans and greeting the idols that came backstage after the concert, it really made me think about how much I wanted to be doing all of this with you. I've always regretted what happened between us because it wasn't a choice I wanted to make. There are no words to describe the way that love manifests in front of you from the fans. I always find myself wishing you were still here by my side."

"Hm, cryptic. Is that an answer to my question or do I have to wait another 6 months to call you up and ask again?"

"How long are you going to keep asking?" you uttered, the feeling of disappointment taking over your body as you still couldn't find the courage to finally give in and allow yourself to be happy.

"Until you say yes again."

JULY 2020

The world was still shut as you knew it, yet you were halfway around the world from the place you grew to call home. Your company was generous to give you two months off to spend with your loved ones, and you chose to spend some time cooped up in your parents' house and your childhood home because even though there were so many quarantining requirements to get between the two countries, you hadn't seen your parents in almost 3 years.

Of course, you missed your members, but you lived with them and would continue to see them nearly every day for as long as you could keep your career going. Of course, you missed Mark, but it's not like you could go and see him anyway with the tough restrictions imposed on the Korean citizens.

There was also one big- scratch that- giant problem looming over your and your company's heads. The bane of your existence and public enemy number 1 Dispatch had dangled over your heads the threat of releasing the photos they had grabbed of you and Mark abroad in Vancouver at the start of the year. It wouldn't have been damning evidence considering it was the only photo set they had acquired of the two of you, but you were holding hands with your eyes clearly in view.

Your companies had threatened to sue, of course, but Dispatch has never been scared. Then, your companies tried to play the guilt-trip card and interrogate them on why they would care to do such a thing when the world was suffering enough as it is. Alas, nothing got through to Dispatch. Eventually, your companies surrendered to pay a preposterous amount to get rid of the problem and it probably didn't even make a dent in SM's savings, but it surely hurt your growing but small company even if SM took the majority of the bill.

It was completely eating you up and tearing your insides to know that because of your slip-up with Mark, the trainees in your company had to get their debut pushed back by a good probable few years.

Mark had been the perfect boyfriend, supporting you through your change to your new company and your short training period before your debut. Mark had been there to metaphorically hold your hand as you got to know the other girls and make lifelong sister bonds out of it. Mark had been there to cheer you on in the early mornings when you were doing your first few stages. Mark had been there when your first comeback did even better than your debut and propelled you to the top of the industry.

So why, oh why, were you thinking about whether being together is good for everyone involved? There you found yourself in a dark room, the phone next to your head as soft cries and hiccups escaped your lips.

"Baby, please tell me what's wrong. I hate when you cry and it's really hurting me that I'm not there with you right now. Do you want me to come there? Cause I will! I'll say I'm sick or something." he's rambling through the phone and you can hear that it's raining heavily in Seoul.

"Mark, you know that I love you right?"

"Of course I do," he coos gently, "And you're my once-in-a-lifetime great love. I love you too, baby. What's wrong?"

You don't even believe the words that come out of your mouth when you whisper them, "I can't do this anymore Mark. I think we need to break up."

"What? Y/N, this is not funny," his voice instantly turns serious.

"I'm sorry Mark, but I'm serious," you're sobbing at this point and you're surprised he can even still understand you, "I really don't want to do this but-"

"So why are you doing this? Look, let's just talk when you get back, okay? You're coming home soon, right? Or I can take a flight there, but baby, don't make these rash decisions- we're just missing each other."

"The guilt is eating me up, Mark," you confess in hushed tones, "I feel like I don't deserve to be happy. And every time I'm with you, I feel only this sense of anxiety about being caught together that I can't shake. I love you so much, Mark, but I don't know why I feel like this."

"Y/N, we've dealt with so much over the years and we've fought through everything together! We can work through this together, I promise. Just give me some time to think about what to do and everything will be okay-" he's crying now too and it breaks your heart to hear it because he barely ever cries, "I'll get the company to pay yours back what you paid to those assholes. Come on, baby."

"Mark," you whimper, "I ruined the company. I don't want to hurt my members either. Even if we admit to dating, imagine the hate that my group will face! I don't want to let them down any more than I already have."

"I'll tell the fans to not hate- Y/N just tell me what I can do to stop whatever this break-up idea in your head is. We're meant to be, Y/N. We're each other's perfect match."

"I don't love you any less, Mark. Please remember that. I need to do this for my members and for my company that took a leap of faith in me. I don't want to walk away from you, but I don't see any other choice. I don't want to hurt you or your members either. I can't be seen with you."

His voice is small and strained, "You're breaking my heart, Y/N."

"And I'm never going to forgive myself for it."

EARLY 2018

This was definitely the hardest decision of your life and it wasn't one that you took lightly either. It was something you had been thinking about for over a year and more intensely when the company started to press you on extending your exclusive training contract.

Herin Seo had entered SM just before you did and she lived and trained with you. She was your best friend outside of Mark and it broke your heart when she left the company only after 4 years in 2017. There were only a few months left on her contract, but she was desperate to get an out and an idol survival show finally gave her the motivation to break free.

Right now, she's taking the seat in front of you after setting down your favourite drinks from your favourite cafe that she still remembers, "Iced vanilla matcha latte for me and an iced oat latte for my best friend."

"You're the best Herin! My treat next time," you promise as you take the first sip. It's been a while since you've come to the café since it hurts to go when it used to be your spot with Herin.

"Well better be soon because I'm leaving in 5 days," she pouts, "I'm sorry I could only come to visit for a short time."

"It's okay. I'm glad to see you anyway after all these months," you grin, "How's settling back in Manchester?"

"I mean it's always been home but it took me a few months to really get to grips with the fact that I wasn't leaving after a week like I did when I would visit during my training. It's really weird to know England is now my permanent home and that I'm going to start school again there," she looks outside the large window that overlooks the river, "I really really miss Seoul."

You take her hand and muster your best comforting smile, "I'm really sorry that things didn't turn out how we wanted them to."

"Ha, it's not your fault Y/N. I mean, you're in the same boat; what are you planning to do with this contract thing?"

You sigh at the age-old question that's been plaguing your mind for months. In fact, your meeting with the company to decide your future was tomorrow and you still had no concrete idea of what you wanted, "I really don't know Herin. SM has been everything I've known for 5 years and everyone I love is at the company. I don't even know how to switch agencies or what happens at other agencies. At the same time, I know they're planning for a group soon, but I have this feeling that I can't shake when I think about it. I look at Jimin and Minjeong and my sweet baby Yizhou and I don't think I'm what the company wants."

"But they've invested so much time and money into you!" Herin furrows her eyebrows, "Surely they're building a group around you, Yizhuo, Koeun, Lami, and Hina! We were a pre-debut team! They can't just disregard all of you guys, right?"

"I wouldn't put it past them," you're fiddling nervously with your hands, "They've been good to me, but they're a business at the end of the day. I'm so torn up and I was thinking you could help me. How did you know that you wanted to leave the company?"

She thinks for a while before answering your question, "Well the survival show was just the reason why I left before my contract was up, but I already knew that I wasn't going to stay on and re-sign. For me, it just felt like I had more to give, but the environment I was in wasn't letting me grow anymore. I felt like there was nothing more I could give to SM. Even though Idol School didn't work out for me, I was still glad that I went."

You nod along to her story, "I haven't told anyone about this Herin. Mark's been bugging me about my terms for re-signing my contract, so I don't think it's even fathomable for him for me to leave."

"It's about you, Y/N. This is your story, your career, and your decision. There are going to be a lot of people that are going to be hurt or angry, but they will never understand what you're going through. Especially not the people who already debuted," Herin advises, "Look, talk about it with Mark tonight, and don't leave it until after your meeting because that might hurt more, but if he really loved you and wanted what's best for you, he would trust in your decision."

"You're right Herin. Thanks for being there for me."

So, you called Mark later on that night to come over. You had cooked up a few dishes for you to share and asked your dorm mates if they could give you a few hours for some alone time. Telling Mark was definitely going to be hard, but you couldn't imagine the conversation with the girls, who were going to be the most hurt. You remember when Herin left- you weren't angry, but you were overwhelmingly sad about the thought of the girl you started your journey with not being there anymore. That was when you started to question if you should still be there too, but you were scared to instill this thought in your other younger trainees that maybe thought they still had a chance.

"Hi baby," Mark is beaming when you open the door to him. He quickly shuts the door behind him with his foot and wraps you up in a tight hug, making sure to plant a kiss on your lips and then all over your face, "I missed your gorgeous face so much- oh my God the apartment smells so good! What did you cook?"

"Just some beef and rice," you lead him over to the dining table with the food set out already.

"Oh my gosh, you're so amazing," Mark smooches your cheek affectionately and takes his seat on the table. You had lived at the dorm for your whole time at SM and along the way, Mark had chosen his own seat at your dining table for when you had dinners inside, which was almost every date you shared.

You start with small talk, letting him eat and enjoy his meal before you inevitably break a little bit of his precious heart. You hadn't seen Mark for a few days since he was busy with some schedules, so he tells you all about the boys and what they've been up to recently. They're working on the biggest project NCT has ever done so far- a full 18-member release- and it's going spectacularly well. The album itself was a few weeks out, but each unit had been dropping some songs along the way.

"Babe, the company is throwing a release party when the album drops in a few weeks! Isn't that so exciting? They actually asked us what food we want at the party so we're all going crazy. I think Hyuck asked for a fondue fountain, so I'm dying to see if they'll actually give that," he's chuckling, halfway through his plate, "Do you have any special requests?"

Okay, deep breath. Now's the time. It's all or nothing.

"Actually Mark, I invited you over to talk about something," you begin and the smile on his face drops at your warning tone, "Please don't be upset with me."

"Ah, what's wrong?" he's pouting and you have to look away to get the strength to say what you need to. If you looked in his eyes any longer, you would find some reason to convince you to stay just for him.

"My contract meeting is tomorrow," you gulp, "I'm going to leave the company, Mark."

The sound of his chair scraping against the floor makes you cringe, "What? Y/N, what? What do you mean you're leaving the company? Where are you going to go? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I just made up my mind today, Mark. I'm sorry I didn't confide in you, but this was a decision I had to make for myself," tears are welling up along your lash line, "I spoke to Herin today and I realised that the only thing making me stay any longer was you."

"But you're so close to debut!" he's arguing pleadingly, crouching beside you and holding your hand, "Babe, I can't imagine this company without you."

"I'm not Mark. You know that I'm not any closer to debut than I was when I joined 5 years ago. You're indispensable to this company, but I'm really not," you expressed, "I don't want to leave and I love you, your boys, and my girls, but I think this is what's best for me."

"But where are you going to go?" Mark sniffles, "I love you so much Y/N, but what's going to happen to us?"

You shake your head at his insinuations, "No, Mark. Don't worry. Nothing's going to happen to us and I'll make sure that whatever company I join will know about us and protect us. I hope you'll find it in you to forgive me for this."

He stands up and wraps his arms around you from above, "I'm sorry for reacting this way Y/N, but there's nothing for you to be sorry for. I trust you, okay? I love you and I want you to do what's best for you. I know I can't make decisions for you, but I'll try my best to support you however I can."

You look up at him with adoration dripping from your eyes, "I love you, Mark. We're going to be okay, yeah?"

He brings his head down and connects your lips in the most love-filled way that your heart explodes in that familiar overwhelming feeling that Mark always seems to do to you, "We're going to be okay, baby."

LATE 2022

The world was playing a sick joke on you- it really was. There was no way your whole career wasn't just some April Fools' prank or that you weren't just the main target of some joke show.

You always prided yourself on being close with the company's staff and higher-ups. As a leader of your group, you felt that it was integral to your success that you were able to communicate your wishes and worries to the company and this gave you more creative freedom too. Apparently, the company too was getting more comfortable with you.

"What did you just say?" your eyes were incredulous, peering towards your sheepish CEO, "That's actually the worst idea I've ever heard in my life."

"Look, Y/N, you wanted a feature on your song," your CEO chuckles at your response, "I think this is an amazing idea."

"You're literally giving Dispatch a green light to release those photos. Do you want me to email you a picture of me and Mark making out so you can just tweet it from the official account?" you counter, "Why in the hell would having my ex-boyfriend feature on my solo debut title track be anything short of a terrible idea?"

"Mark is incredibly famous and incredibly talented," she begins, counting with her fingers, "You have high standards. We have a good relationship with SM Entertainment. Your fans love shipping the two of you together since you're in the same age group."

"He's also my ex-boyfriend. Is that not extremely problematic? Everyone will hyper analyse every interaction we have or have had and then they're actually going to figure out that we dated." you ponder, "The worst part of this all is that I know he would say yes if his company lets him."

"Exactly- he's your ex-boyfriend, not your current one. By all logic, he's now just another fellow idol or colleague that you can collaborate with. Anyway, SM will definitely say yes; look how many of their idols are in relationships or at least feature on tracks."

"This is all Crush and Joy's fault," you groan, looking at the pleased expression on your CEO's face knowing that she had won the argument.

When your company proposed the idea of having a solo debut to you half a year ago, you had vehemently declined the opportunity, citing it wouldn't be beneficial to your group as a whole and that you wanted to be known for your group and not your individuality. Your members, on the other hand, had different ideas and talked you into at least hearing out the company. You had really only agreed to the debut when they told you that they would give you full musical freedom and the help that you personally requested. It only seemed like a good idea when you realised that someone in the group needs to be the one to start doing solo activities so the rest of the group can follow suit. You've always known that Jian has been curious about acting.

So you find yourself swiveling in your chair in the studio, waiting for Mark to find his way to the room. It's your first time working together for your solo debut and the last time you had spoken to him was a text he sent you asking if you actually wanted him to feature on the track before he gave a response to his company. You begrudgingly replied a yes because even though you still didn't think it was a good idea, you couldn't imagine yourself working with anyone other than Mark. The industry was crazy sometimes.

The knocking on the door snapped you out of your thoughts and you jumped up to open it to Mark Lee holding two cups on the other side.

"Hey pretty. I got us some coffee," he pushes a cup into your hand and you move aside to let him in, "How are you?"

"Don't call me pretty," you mumble as you turn away to hide the blush starting to appear on your cheeks, "But I'm okay. It's getting busier with the holidays coming up, so you know how that is, but the company thought this time was a great time to work on my debut."

"I feel you," Mark grimaces, taking a seat on the other spinning chair, "Don't tell anyone but Dream is actually having another comeback. It's going to be out just before Christmas."

"Another one?" your eyes widen in shock, "But you just released 2 Baddies and I know you definitely have a repackage soon!"

"Yeah, it's hard to be part of both units," he sighs, "Cause our new album will be over 6 months out from Beatbox, but only 3 months from 2 Baddies. Whatever, you know I love what I do."

"Doesn't mean you don't get tired," you cross your arms, "Now I feel bad having you on this track. You are way too busy, Mark! Why didn't you or your company say no?"

He shakes his head to reassure you, "Nah, trust me Y/N; you're exactly the break I need from the boys. Besides, I've never had the chance to formally work with you, so why would I give up the opportunity when it comes? We always made a great team back then."

You smile fondly, thinking about all those times when you and Mark were young teenagers and would huddle up in the practice rooms writing songs together and creating melodies on your guitars.

"I guess we did. Anyway, have a listen to this track. It's just something I wrote a while ago, but it always seemed unfinished so I thought that a feature would complete it," you hand him a pair of headphones and gesture over to your laptop with the track already loaded up, "If you like it, you can do your part in the second verse, but otherwise we can start from scratch."

You watch his face as he listens to the song and you're endeared to find out he still carries the same habit of letting his face do all the talking whenever he's listening to something new. His head is bobbing up and down as he nods along to the song and you can easily tell which parts he likes.

"So, what do you think?" you inquire.

He has a grin on his face, "I love it! Honestly! It's a cute song about a crush, I guess?"

"Yeah, I didn't want to go with any song that's lyrically strong for my debut. This song's pretty unassuming and you know how important it is to the companies to have a general public-friendly song," you shrug. They didn't really explicitly give you guidelines, but you knew what the company was really looking for- a hit, "Can you work with that beat? I'll send you the song of course and you don't have to rush or anything."

"I'll see what I can do," Mark teases, "Can I get an insider sneak peek at the rest of the album? You know, feature perks and all of that."

You flush even redder than when he complimented you earlier, "I'm going to be so honest Mark, the whole album is about you. Every song I've written is about you."

He shrugs casually, "I would've figured. You're a big inspiration to my writing too. Is that a no, then?"

You decide that there was no point shying away from Mark's request, considering that he would end up hearing each and every song whenever your album came out anyway. Plus, the two of you were artists and you understood being each others' muse- good or bad. Mark had seen you in every vulnerable state possible. Showing him your songs that you were comfortable enough to release to the public anyway was nothing to you.

"You can listen."

You don't bother giving Mark any explanations for any song- he's the one that lived through these experiences with you. You leave him with your tracklist on the laptop and tell him you would leave him for a few moments to grab some lunch for the two of you in the company cafeteria. You were hoping it was going to be a quick trip down and back up, but you had run into a producer you were also working with on the album, and that gave Mark at least 5 songs worth of time alone.

What you hadn't expected upon returning was to find Mark crying softly, his sweater paws rubbing at his eyes.

"Mark? Are you crying?"

Your surprise caused him to jump up and frantically wipe away his tears, "Ha. That's a really sad album, huh?"

The guilt continues to eat you up from the inside out, "I'm not going to release all of them, I think. A few sad songs and fill the rest in with inconspicuous tracks."

"Well your songs are beautiful anyway," he gives you a pained smile, "You're an amazing writer. I just wish I wasn't the cause of your pain."

"Hey," you scold softly, bumping his arm with yours, "Don't say that. You were nothing but amazing to me. You made me so happy. It was just the circumstances around us."

He chuckled bitterly to himself, "If we weren't famous- if this industry wasn't so vicious, I would still have you?"

"Mark," you warn, but he cuts you off.

"Have you thought about what I asked you?" he interrupts, "It's been a year, you know? I still miss you."

"Mark, it's not that easy," you counter, "Nothing's changed!"

"It's either you want to be with me or you don't. Don't skirt around it and just tell me the truth, okay? It would really make working together easier if I know where we stand. I won't stop fighting for us until you tell me to stop, so tell me what you want, Y/N," Mark pleads, standing up to face you, "I'm sorry for springing it out of nowhere, but I need to know. I can't move on until I know to let you go."

You hate yourself for what you did to Mark. He was the boy that taught you how to love and how to love patiently, sincerely, and passionately. He was the boy that held your hand and rubbed your back when you cried and the boy that celebrated every success with you. He was the boy that told you how proud he was of you, even every time you felt like the world was collapsing around you. He was the boy who would lay kisses on your forehead and whisper sweet nothings in your ear whenever you faced another setback. He was the boy that made flowers bloom out of your heart from his kind gestures and the way he showed you how much he loved you. And if nothing else, Mark was the boy that made you happy.

You remember a conversation with your youngest member the night before. You had confided in her how nervous you were to work with Mark and she lectured you on finally letting yourself be happy. You were already a 4-year idol and Mark was coming onto 7 years. You weren't rookies anymore and you had solid fanbases. It was clear that the companies weren't extremely opposed to revealing that the two of you were dating back then, so she told you that it would be fine now. Kali told you, rather cliché-ly, that the heart wants what it wants and your heart has been screaming and begging from Mark since the second you ended that phone call with him all those years ago.

"Y/N?"

"Mark," you meet his eyes and melt all over again, "It's you, Mark."

Mark wraps one arm around your waist and pulls you tighter. The other hand reaches up to your face to brush your hair out of your face and cradle your cheek as he brings it up to his own face. Your noses are almost touching as Mark lays it all bare for you, "Do you love me or do you not, Y/N?"

"I do," the feeling is cathartic when you finally tell him and when he finally presses his lips in a searing kiss that sets off all the fireworks in your heart. The feeling of Mark is familiar, but the kiss is longing and hopeful and you can't get enough.

You're both panting when he breaks the kiss and he rests his forehead against yours as he laughs softly in relief. He's been waiting to do that for over 2 years.

"I need you back, Y/N. It's been the worst 2 years of my life," he whispers against your lips, "Please come back."

You smile when he opens his eyes. They're that shade you grew to love all those years ago and they're sparkling like the day he first asked you to be his girlfriend.

Nothing's changed in your environment, that's for sure. What you're also sure about is that each time you see Mark again, you feel a little braver and more courageous. Each time Mark tells you that he loves you even though you shattered his heart like glass, you feel like his love can get you through anything. Maybe you needed those 2 years to see what you were missing or maybe you were just stupid.

Whatever. All you know now is that even 2 years on, Mark Lee is still begging for your love and your brain is losing out in its battle against your heart. It might've taken you two years, but now you see that all you need is Mark Lee by your side to get through the torrential storm that was heading your way and that you were going to get out on the other side to a bright and sunny sky, as long as he was holding your hand and leading you.

You place a kiss on his lips that tells him all he needs to know, "I'm here, Mark. It's always been you. You've always been the one. Always."

759 notes · View notes

sturniolos-blog · 3 months

Text

In trouble again? - Sturniolo little sister oneshot

warnings - swearing, fluff, arguing

—————————

Quick backstory behind this oneshot:

When Y/n was 14, her 19 year old older triplet brothers moved to LA. Upsetting her for a while, hard not seeing them around the house.

But after a lot of convincing, when Y/n turned 15, Marylou and Jimmy agreed to let her move in with them.

Obviously, nick, chris, and matt were okay with it.

You may wonder how a girl fit in with three boys, well it was easy for her.

Nick was the one she’d go too for boys, about her period (since he bought her pads and what she needed when she was on it), she'd go to Nick about a breakup, literally about anything that Matt and Chris would freak out about if she told them.

Then Chris was the one she’d go to if she needed too laugh, needed a hug, (chris gives really good ones), He always found a way too make her laugh, even when she was crying. Although when y/n was crying chris usually got emotional with her, so they cried and laughed together.

Now Matt, matt was the one she’d go too for a lot of things. Anxiety was a big one, she had a lot, so she usually asked for tips and stuff. Y/n also gets frustrated, annoyed, anything negative really easily, (like matt) so she usually went to Matt to calm down and take a breath. Y/n also usually slept with Matt, much like chris she hated sleeping alone, so she usually slept with, matt, but occasionally with math and chris because chris was usually found in matt’s bed.

Y/n also gets in trouble at school a lot! (Bad y/n)

—————————

2:03pm

I walked inside my house with yet another write up i got this week, it's only thursday and this is my third write up this week, (new record by the way) this time was for yelling at my math teacher how she didn't know how to teach. She seriously doesn't because if she did would not have a D- in her class right now.

"Is anyone home?" I yelled out, kicking my shoes off and throwing my bag down.

I see Nick walk downstairs, "Hey y/n!" He says cheerfully, "Matt and Chris went to return the jeans you didn't like and Chris wanted to go to get a new sweatshirt or something." Nick smiled before his eyes trail down to my hand. He let's out a sigh, "Y/n...Please tell me.." He trails off, his voice filled with disapointment.

I look down at the paper too, "Umm.." I clear my throat, "Sorry I thought they would've called or at least texted you guys already. My bad. Now can you please sign it before Matt gets home?" I pleaded, handing the paper to Nick for him to sign. Matt was the worst one for when i got in trouble, he changes a lot. He's like all sweet and then his face gets red with anger. It's scary.

Nick took the paper and grabbed a pen from the kitchen table, "I'll sign it, but they took Matt's number down. So there is no doubt he got that call or text." Nick says, signing the paper with his signature like it said too do. I let out a groan as nicks eyes glanced over the quick explanation of what happened.

"You went off on your math teacher?" Nick scoffed.

"I already told Ms.Reel I don't play! She kept testing me, literally and figuratively. She tried givin' me a pop quiz like I was 'bouta do all that. Yeah no thanks." I defended. Grabbing a water from the fridge and sitting down at the island.

"What exactly did you say, n/n?" Nick asked, giving me the now signed paper.

"All i said was, 'I'm not doing this.' and when she asked why I said 'because why would i take a pop quiz from a teacher that teaches like she graduated at the university of nowhere.' and when she told me to go to the office i said, 'gladly, i'd rather have 6 months of detention then ever come back too this bootlegged not teachin us nothin' classroom. And then i got kicked out." I explained.

Matt signed the one i got on monday for going off on a girl for making fun of my friend. He told me it was okay and that i was sticking up for somebody i cared about.

The one i got on tuesday was for walking out of the classroom when my science teacher didn’t let me go to the bathroom but let a boy out when he asked. Chris signed that one for me, Matt found out about it, i didn’t know they had his number, he was upset but he said as long as i didn’t get another one it’s fine.

So after this one i am definitely getting yelled at by Matt.

The front door opens and i hear muttering, sounding like bickering.

“Wait, i left my jacket in the car, can you go get it?” I hear Chris ask Matt.

I then hear Matt mutter something along the lines of, “You fucking idiot” before walking away.

Chris then speed walks into the kitchen, “Y/n, you seriously messed up. Matt was already in a bad mood since he woke up, and then at the mall workers were giving him shit for trying to return your jeans without the tags on them, and then he got a call about how you got in trouble. So you’re actually fucked.”

My eyes widened, “Um- yeah i’m just gonna go up-” I start to walk away but bump into Matt.

“Just the person i was looking for!” Matt says. sarcastically, his arms crossing as he stands in front of me.

“Go sit, now.” He demands. I rub my forehead and nod, sitting at the kitchen table.

Matt sits down next to me and grabs the write up slip, “Nick signed it already? That’s great.” Matt continues with the sarcasm.

“Don’t bring me into this!” Nick puts his hands up in defense as him and Chris are watching us.

Matt then gives nick and chris a look that makes them both go to their rooms.

Great.

I take a breath in before starting to talk as Matt reads the write up slip, “So on a scale of 1-10 how mad-”

“Don’t even finish that sentence, y/n.” He grits out.

I nod and bite my lip, i’m really fucking scared.

“You can’t- why would you- who even- where- what- the fuck!?” Matt stutters.

“I don’t even know what to say, y/n! This is the third one this week! It’s thursday! There are only five days in a school week! It shouldn’t be this hard to stay out of trouble!” Matt yells.

“I’m sorry i just-” I get cut off.

“No! You don’t just do anything, you can’t just do something like this and keep getting away with it. You don’t need to be acting like this.” Matt says, putting his head in his hands.

“I also don’t need your opinion, i mean why are you even getting so mad? Nick and Chris don’t care this much.” I say, nice going y/n.

Matt scoffs. “Go to your room.”

“But-”

“Now!” He yells.

“Whatever!” I scoff and get up, literally stomping to my room.

—————————

10:16pm

It’s been 8 whole hours since i last talked to Matt.

Which was crazy, Nick and Chris came in to ask me how i was doing but i just shrugged, i got to keep my phone so i was doing alright.

I get another knock on my door, expecting it to be Matt, i quickly say, “Come in!” But it’s Chris. I love him but i lay back down, scrolling on my phone.

He walks up and sits on my bed, rubbing my shoulder.

“I think you should talk to Matt.” Chris says, his voice soft and welcoming.

“He doesn’t wanna talk to me. He’s made it clear, we haven’t talked since the argument.” I sniffle, i was so upset.

“He does wanna talk to you, but he’s stubborn also, so he is not gonna be the first one to say something. If you go and apologize, and really mean it, like not just go in there because i told you too, then he will appreciate it and say sorry too. I promise.” Chris says as i sit up.

I put my pinky out, “Pinky promise?” I whisper.

He interlocks our pinkies, “Pinky promise.” He confirms.

I nod as he leaves my room, about 5 minutes pass and i decide to get up too.

I knock on Matt’s door, I hear some shuffling before the door starts to open, “Nick how many times-” Matt starts but stops when he sees me.

“N/n.” He says, his voice was much softer.

“Matt- i’m so sorry for getting in trouble and i’m sorry for saying that you get too and and it’s just schools been really hard and i hate it and everyone’s annoying and i don’t know what to do and i-” I sob but get cut off when Matt pulls me in for a tight hug.

“Okay, calm down baby.” He whispers, his fingers going through my hair.

I sob into his chest, that’s all it was. Stress and being overwhelmed.

“Shh..” Matt hushed, bringing me into his room with his arms still wrapped around me, kicking the door shut with his foot and bringing me to sit down on his bed.

“Y/n, listen.” He pulls away from the hug.

“You’re right, i have been harsher than normal, but that’s only because i want you to succeed, you’re in highschool! You are growing up so fast and i want the best for you. And i’m sorry that i’m not the fun one all the time. I’ll try, but if i try you have to promise that you will too, and if you’re ever feeling upset or down that you’ll talk to me.” Matt comforts.

I nod and wipe my nose with my sleeve.

“Can i sleep in here tonight?” I ask.

Matt laughs, “Of course you can.”

—————————

why is this literally the most basic thing i’ve ever written oh lord goodbye idk what happened with me today but im just gonna start dad matt tmr and it will either be done tmr or thursday (i pinky promise) hope yall enjoy this one!

#matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #spotify #sturniolo #littlesister

150 notes · View notes

ghostswithoutokday · 16 days

Text

Lucifer X reader| Vox x reader| they are Jealous!??

(btw this is not a poly relationship. These are two different scenarios and two different relationships. Also, if used please credit me. 😀).

(scenario one Lucifer)

Lucifer isn’t the type to get jealous easily a lot usually you’re the one who gets jealous if somebody even calls him by your nicknames or when they get a little too… Touchy with him your blood boil, but when Lucifer does get jealous, it tends to be a bit dramatic though nothing a little bit of cuddling and kisses will help. I’ll be back to golden retriever. self one day you were just walking around the palace, admiring The red decor until a servant kept up to you. He was just asking normal questions, but he seemed to be a bit touchy when Lucifer saw this he was not happy. But not mad as the conversation continue on he saw how more touchy the server was getting. “ DARLING. Uh ham- I mean Darling I need you to see some thing I made for you” Lucifer as he brings your hand to his looking at the servant as you both made his way to his office he slammed the door, kinda hard, but not as as if he wasn’t mad, but annoyed “ y/ n who is that fellow?” Lucifer, an angry tone. “ Servants.” You said. “ but he was touching you.” Lucifer said getting a little close to you. “ it’s fine Lu I mean you touch me all the time and it’s fine”

“ yeah because I’m your boyfriend that’s another story love you shouldn’t let people just randomly touch you” Lucifer said pounding you walk up a bit close to him “ Lucifer are you… Jealous?” I said, giving him a little smirk Lucifer blushes of it. “ what?! No no hehe Nono no NO” he said panicking a bit “ I mean I do but like not as if-“ you cut him off by giving him a kiss on his lips Lucifer was done for a bit, but soon kissed back “ Lucy why would you think I would let some else have me. I love you for you.” Lucifer looks a bit sad. “ I’m sorry, honey. I know it’s just after Lilith and everything. I..” held his chin, making him look at you. “ everything’s fine now I’m here. No one to hurt you no more…”

“you have me…”

. -. -. -. .- .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.—.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- . (scenario two Vox)

Vox had quite the temper he never get he never got mad at you don’t worry, but he still sometimes through tantrums like he was five years old and when you throw that in with jealousy problems start to well notice something even a glimpse of someone even touching you or accidentally popping into you he get all angry and protective because he doesn’t wanna lose you and how you’re his pride and joy one day you were talking to Val discussing about who knows when Vox came from behind you and put his arms around you as he was hugging you from the back staring at Val with cold eyes “ oh it looks like your little boy over here isn’t happy that I’m talking to you?” Val said in a teasing way later that day after everything happened, you stepped into Vox’s office “ it’s time for lunch Vox need to take a break. You’ve been here all. Morning “ he stepped in his office and saw nothing not even his computers were on that was odd soon the door slam shut you turn around quickly seeing your boyfriend who was a bit angry “ y/n why the fuck were you talking Val?” he said an angry tone. “ He was just asking for a project for designing clothes”

“ I get that, but he was a bit too… Clingy and touchy with you” you gave a small grin “ you were the one who was cling on me” “ that’s because I’m your boyfriend. I have a right to do that.” Vox said in an angry tone. “ I’m supposed to be the one who is you touching all over you I’m supposed to be the one to give you kisses and stuff not Val “ baby, it was just one touch that’s it and plus you have me actually and you do all those things what are you jealous or something?” Was a bit shocked by what you said a light blue blush. Appeared on his face. He cleared his throat. “ still though… you’re my partner, my lover.. not his “ I came close to vox giving him a kiss on the cheek “ don’t worry voxxy I’m not leaving you I would never leave you now now come on. Let’s go eat lunch.” I said, taking his hand soon leaving with him

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-/-:-:-:-/-:-:-/-/-:-:-:-:-/-/-.-/-/-:-/-

( thank you for reading my lovely’s I will be making a Adam, and Alastor one also later today so stay tune 😀😎⭐��)

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #Lucifer X reader #lucifer morningstar #vox x reader #vox #the vees

95 notes · View notes

teymars · 7 months

Note

Imagine reader giving birth to twins boys

they become 14YO, and they are famous in the clan as troublemakers and Neteyam and reader have to deal with them ..

Ah isn’t that CUTE!!!

THIS IS SUCH A CUTESIE IDEA !!

-no warnings, just some fluff, family dynamics & sweet Dad(dy)!Neteyam (also mentions of bullying + fights if that counts??)

Loud caterwauling blasted throughout the camp, reaching you and Neteyam from within your family-hut. You glanced at your mate, resisting the incredible urge to roll your eyes, there were only two possible candidates for the source of that noise.

“Pshh, I’ll go sort it out, again.” Neteyam sighed, chucking his hands up in defeat. He quickly rose from his spot next to you and hightailed it to the awaiting ‘crime’ scene. For the past few weeks, your twin 14 year-old sons had been causing fights consistently amongst the clan’s young trainees.

You crouched for a moment, subconsciously counting down the moments before your lover’s deep, authoritative voice boomed over the ruckus outside. “BOYS, GET OVER HERE!!” The scolding your two son’s were now receiving increased in volume as Neteyam dragged them both by the neck, back into your hut.

“Ma ‘Teyam-” he cut you off swiftly “How many times do I have to repeat myself to you two?? You can’t just go around fighting people!” Neteyam bellowed, his tail thrashing angrily behind him.

“Sorry, Sir. It was my fault.” Tsyalu, the youngest twin, piped up bashfully. He tried hard to avoid his fathers menacing gaze. “That’s bullsh- ugf’ come on bro, you and I both know Rahaylo deserved it!” The eldest, Myerìn, blurted without shame, barely managing to dodge using ‘foul language’ infront of both his parents.

“Enough, I don’t care wether it was ‘deserved’. Tsy, you have to stop taking the heat for this skxawng! And YOU-” Neteyam gestured to a smirking Myerìn “-need to quit causing trouble, you read me??” Both boys nodded silently before stalking off to different parts of the hut.

You had observed the scolding, originally aiming to hold back a chuckle of amusement, until something in Tsy’s gaze and the way he spoke left you irked. You sat quietly beside him, assisting in preparing the fruits for dinner. Thankfully neither him nor his brother had been injured in the skirmish, you noted.

“What is the matter, sweet child?” You cooed, stroking the side of his cheek as slight tears swelled in his defeated eyes. “It’s nothing, mama..” the boy assured you, trying to hide his face. “Don’t be silly Tsyalu, you can tell me what’s wrong.” You encouraged, faintly aware of your husband’s ears flicking in interest at your conversation, as he watched from his place by the fire-pit.

“Well, we only keep fighting-” he broke off in a quiet sob “-be-because Rahaylo has been bullying me..” Both you and Neteyam fell stock-still at his words, feeling an onslaught of guilt overcome you. “Yea, and Dad told us to stick up for ourselves, so we did.” Myerìn informed, rather nonchalantly. Neteyam looked almost shell-shocked, having realised the poor communication that led to all this.

He moved closer to where you and both your sons were now crouched, reaching down to rest a hand on each boy’s shoulder comfortingly. “I’m sorry, boy. I had no idea.. why didn’t you say anything about this though? Violence is not a good way to solve these issues.” Neteyam offered, sounding solemn. “I- we didn’t want you to think we are weak, we thought you’d be proud of us, because we are brave like you.”

“Oh, Tsy..” you whispered, feeling ashamed that your children ever had to feel that way. “I am proud of you, both of you. So is your mother.. we just don’t want to see you both fighting all the time.” Your mate assured them, providing both with a warm embrace. “It is okay to come to us when somebody causes you trouble, we will help you, I promise.” He continued, allowing you to curl up at his side, joining the family hug. They both hummed in understanding.

“We are pretty brave though, right Dad?” Tsyalu whispered. “Just like you?” Myerìn added, hopefully. “Of course you are! You’re the bravest little warriors this clan has ever seen.” You and Neteyam chirped, nuzzling both boy’s foreheads affectionately. The twins smiled contentedly, feeling relieved as they relished within their father’s hard-earned approval.

“Sooo, who won?” Neteyam mused, smirking at his sons pridefully. “Neteyam!” You chided, smacking the back of his head playfully.

“Oel ngati kameie, my sons.”

Sorry this is a little short, I hope it lives up to what you had in mind! 🤍

Neteyam be getting some insane flashbacks 😭

#neteyam sully #avatar 2 #avatar the way of water #avatar #atwow #neteyam #neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan #atwow fanfiction #avatar2 #neteyam x you #dad!neteyam #neteyam x reader

225 notes · View notes

girl-named-matty · 2 months

Text

Love Languages with the HL Boys

The boys and their love languages Tags: Fluff, fluff, fluff and more fluff. This HC set contains characters: Sebastian, Ominis, Garreth, Leander, Amit, and Andrew. Rating: General audiences. .. The girls version will be out tomorrow, lmk if you want to be on a tag list for that!

Summary: My HC's for the boys' love languages.

Sebastian:

Sebastian’s love language is Quality time.

He loves to spend time with anyone he’s close to. Whether it be his partner, his family, or his friends.

It reassures him that they still want to be around him and it's his way of showing that he cares too.

Sometimes it's not even having to do anything together. Sometimes it’s just simply him being in the same room as someone he cares for, just being around each other.

He loves one-on-one conversations as well. Conversations that are completely focused between him and the other person.

Those kinds of conversations are the ones that reassure him that the person really does care about what he thinks and of course, in return he gives his undivided attention to them, showing that he cares.

Ominis:

Ominis’ love language is Acts of service.

He loves to help. He offers it all the time.

And he also loves to receive help as well.

He’s struggled a lot in his life and for a long time refused help because he was nervous about what others may think of him.

But when he opened up, it was like a breath of fresh air.

Receiving these small acts of service reassures him that people really do care and that they aren’t going to shun him like his family did.

That the people he loves and cares about love and care about him too.

Garreth:

Garreth’s love language is Physical touch.

He loves physical touch so much.

It’s not even a romantic thing, it just comes naturally to him since he was raised in a naturally affectionate home.

Hugs are casually given but they mean everything to him.

It’s so much more than just a physical thing.

And if he’s in a relationship with someone, he constantly wants to be holding their hand or some form of touch, even if it's slight.

Leander:

Leander’s love language is Words of affirmation.

He is an insecure guy, we all know this.

And although he tries to hide it, he can’t help but feel so much better at even just the slightest affirmation.

The genuine encouragement and the reassurance that he can do whatever he puts his mind to truly does help him.

Even the simplest “good job” means a lot to him.

Perhaps he wasn’t told it enough when he was growing up or perhaps it’s because he feels he has to live up to an unrealistic expectation but either way these words mean the world to him.

Amit:

Amit’s love language is also Words of affirmation.

He gets overwhelmed a lot really quickly and that causes him to doubt a lot with whatever he’s focused on.

So, words of affirmation help him calm down and realize he’s still doing a good job, even if he’s frustrated or doubtful of himself.

He also loves giving words of affirmation to those he cares about. It just comes naturally to him.

He’s also big on self-affirmation. It helps even when it comes from himself.

But it is just all around more caring and reassuring when it comes from somebody else he cares about.

Andrew:

Andrew’s love language is Receiving gifts.

But in a way different than one would think.

He loves receiving gifts but that’s because he also loves giving them.

Small little things that just let the person know that he cares about them. And he’ll leave the gifts everywhere for them.

On desks, beds, etc… Anywhere really.

And so when he receives a gift–especially from someone he often gifts to–it makes his heart soar knowing that they care about him.

It could be the simplest gift and still give him the biggest smile.

#hl #hogwarts legacy #sebastian sallow #ominis gaunt #garreth weasley #Leander Prewett #Amit Thakkar #Andrew Larson #Hogwarts legacy headcanons #Hogwarts legacy fanfiction #Sebastian sallow fanfiction #Ominis Gaunt fanfiction #Garreth Weasley Fanfiction #Leander Prewett fanfiction #Amit Thakkar fanfiction #Andrew Larson fanfiction

110 notes · View notes

bagopucks · 1 year

Text

A. Matthews - Winter Flu

✄————————————

Auston Matthews x Reader

Requested✨

Word Count: 4.1k

Warning(s): mention of throwing up, reader’s kid is sick, parental insecurities, little bit of angst.

The point of view for this does use you when talking about the reader, simply because this was a request that had more so to do with Auston and Hudson. So I didn’t put it in first person. Also, long as shit, so I proofread ONCE.

Also! With the summer season approaching, those of you who submitted requests with the lake house, and Hughes brothers. Requests that I haven’t gotten to yet. Look forward to those! Once I get past the wisdom teeth surgery, and the end of this senior year. It is solid with the summer content.

—————————————

“I’ll call the school and let them know you’re on your way.”

“They’ll let me pick him up?”

“Yeah. You’ll just have to give your full name and phone number.”

“Do I need an ID?”

“Probably not, Aus. It’s not that formal.”

Auston pulled gently at the dainty silver lightning bolt that hung from his earring. A Christmas gift from the lovely woman he grew so close to. You’d celebrated at home with Auston, and found a nanny to celebrate with his team when he invited you. The holiday had passed, as did New Years, but the decorations in both your and his homes were still up. Auston left his up because Hudson liked to look at them. You left yours up because you didn’t have time to take them down.

He was nervous. It had been the first time you asked him to pick Hudson up from school. But these were special circumstances. The school day was far from over, and Hudson was sick. Auston had to leave his morning skate early to be there, still dressed in a pair of compression pants and shorts, and a black t-shirt with his number on the sleeve. He stepped into the building, and stood by the window that looked into the office. He’d never looked after a sick kid before. Maybe the Marleau boys right after they got over a cold, but never in the midst of sickness.

“Hello. How can we help you today?” An older woman approached the window with a clip board, setting it down on the counter and sliding it through the window as she opened it.

“I’m here to pick up Hudson?” Auston hadn’t even considered using a last name. There was surely only one sick Hudson.

“Right. His mom called and said a friend would be in.”

Auston’s deep brown eyes immediately lifted from the clip board.

“Write your name and number here, and we’ll let you in the office while somebody finds him.”

Auston slowly scrawled his name and number out, sliding the clip board back in the woman’s direction. He would have texted you if you weren’t in the middle of a meeting. Auston stepped into the office when the woman opened the door, finding a seat in one of the plastic chairs.

A second secretary left the office, and Auston was left in an awkward silence, the woman in the room occasionally glancing up at him.

“Are you the kid’s dad?” Such a question surprised and offended him. Auston wasn’t even sure why. Possibly because of the tone in the woman’s voice.

“Kinda? I’ve been with his mom for a while.”

“I wondered.” He tensed, watching her disinterested eyes focus on something else.

Was it an insult? Did it have to do with the last name thing? Or the simple fact that he wasn’t related? He hated to think it would have been anything else. Auston’s jaw set, and for a moment he considered telling the woman off. He could recall the endless amounts of times his mother had never taken such disrespect. Even his father. But he refrained.

The second secretary entered the office soon after, with Hudson, sluggishly following behind.

“Mom?” He had called before his eyes even left the floor. His need for his mother made Auston feel even less prepared than before. He didn’t have the qualifications for this.

“Mom’s in a meeting, bud.” Auston gained Hudson’s attention, watching the boy’s eyes widen. Hudson sniffled and quickly walked over to hug Auston. He looked pale, but flushed in the cheeks. And he certainly felt warm.

“I wanna go home.” Hudson whined softly, and Auston slowly guided him back a few steps so he could stand up.

“That’s where we’re headed, little man.” He put his hand out, and Hudson quickly held onto it. “I’ll take your bag.” Auston held his other hand out, and took hold of Hudson’s book bag after the boy shimmied it off. “Thanks, guys.” Auston was swift to speak to the secretaries before he led Hudson out of the office and eventually out of the school building all together.

“How long is mom in a meeting?”

“Probably another hour or so. It’s just you and me for a bit. Your mom said you got sick?”

“Yeah.” Hudson sounded as exhausted as he looked. Once they got to his car, Auston tossed the boy’s bag in the back and helped him hop in and get buckled.

“If you need to throw up, you let me know, okay?” Hudson merely nodded, leaning back into the seat to get comfortable. If he wasn’t sick, his first complaint would have been about the lack of a car seat. But everything had happened so swiftly that morning, that there wasn’t really time for meeting up and taking the one out of your car. Perhaps it was just time to get one of his own.

Auston carefully shut the car door and walked around to the front, sliding in and turning the key in the ignition.

“Do you wanna listen to anything?”

“Uncle Mitchy’s music.” Hudson spoke softly. Auston hated to admit it, but he was always a little jealous of Mitch for getting the title of ‘uncle.’ Auston was patient. He knew Hudson was the only person who could grant him the title of, ‘father,’ but he hoped his face would light up the same way Mitch’s had. He hoped he’d feel that same overwhelming excitement.

Auston connected his phone to the car and opened Spotify to find Mitch’s profile and public playlists. One labeled ‘kiddos’ that he used around Patty’s kids, and Hudson. A plethora of music that ranged from Baby Shark to Kids Bop and Disney. Auston hated Baby Shark, but not near as much as Hudson did. So when that song came on, he skipped it swiftly.

“Can I lay down when we get home?”

Auston glanced in the rear view mirror as he backed out of his parking space.

“For sure, bud. Whatever you want.”

“Do you have Gatorade?”

Oh boy.

“No, sorry. We can check your mom’s fridge though.”

“I really want Gatorade.” Auston could hear the quiver in Hudson’s voice as he pulled out onto the road. The drive back to your place was short, and he was thankful for that. But he was more so worried about the protocol for not having something the kid wanted. Did you go out and get it? Was he supposed to call you? What if Hudson didn’t want an alternative?

When he pulled into the driveway, Auston was quick to park the car and hop out, opening Hudson’s back door to see the kid hunched over and asleep.

“Hudsy,” Auston carefully nudged him. Hudson winced, but his eyes fluttered open. He looked in distress for a moment before his face twisted into discomfort. Auston unbuckled the seatbelt and held his arms out. Hudson quickly moved to the edge of the seat and allowed Auston to pick him up. Once they got inside, Auston set Hudson down. He kicked his shoes off and considered his next options. Hudson quickly walked over to the couch to sit down, curling in on himself.

“You okay, bud?” Hudson merely nodded, and despite Auston’s uncertainty, he decided to go with it. Just for a moment.

Auston slipped down the hall into the boy’s room. He grabbed a blanket off the bed and a little dinosaur stuffed animal. As well as finding a pair of shorts and a comfy shirt Hudson could change into. Comfort always came first when sick. Auston walked back out into the living room, tossing the items onto the love seat before slipping off into the kitchen.

He barely had any more time to think before Auston heard a familiar shuffling in the living room. And heavy footsteps pattering down the hall. He was swift to follow.

“Hudson?” Auston had just barely made it into the bathroom, when the boy started to throw up. His initial reaction was to groan and look away, but Auston had to remind himself he was the adult in this situation.

“It’s okay. Just- you just gotta.. let it out.” His disgust shifted into immediate concern when he heard the quiet cries from the boy. Auston’s brow furrowed, slowly stepping into the bathroom. He grabbed a paper towel when Hudson finally sat on the floor, his body trembling from the exertion, but finally able to relax for a moment. Auston swiftly sat on the floor next to him, taking up most if not all of the space in the tiny bathroom.

“Here,” he held out the paper towel, and Hudson slowly took it, wiping his face and tossing the towel in the trash beside the toilet. Hudson leaned his head against the side of the toilet bowl, gross any other day, but Auston was a kid once too. He knew how easy it was to forget about everything else in the midst of sickness. A cold surface was a cold surface, and it was easing on a raging temperature.

“I want mom,” Hudson’s quiet voice quivered and squeaked, tears falling down his cheeks at a rapid pace. Auston’s chest tightened. He wasn’t cut out for this.

“I’m sorry.” It was a scary feeling, wanting to help somebody and not feeling equipped to do so. Especially when it was the kid you’d grown so close to.

“Please call my mom.” Auston hated hearing those words every time they were spoken, because there was nothing he could do.

“I can’t, Hudsy. She’s busy. I promise she’ll be home soon.” Auston carefully reached out to rest a hand on the boy’s back. Hudson shrugged him off and looked away.

“Hudson.” Auston spoke gently, earning the boy’s gaze. “Are you okay?” It was a stupid question, but he could tell he struck a nerve when Hudson began to cry harder. The little boy inched across the floor to hug Auston, sobbing into his shoulder. It was the first time he’d been sick without his mother. The first time she hadn’t had to leave work to pick him up. Hudson didn’t know how to feel.

“Can you tell me what your mom does when you get sick?”

Auston may not have been the most experienced with kids, but he was still smart.

Hudson wiped the tears from his cheeks, the quiet sporadic breaths interrupting his attempts to speak.

“Take your time.” Auston encouraged gently, rubbing the boy’s back. They sat quietly for a few minutes before Hudson managed to calm down. Exhaustion filled his red eyes, slowly pulling his head out of Auston’s shoulder.

“She lets me lay on the couch.. and I have stuff to drink. And she puts on tv.” He sniffled.

“What do you like to watch?” Auston asked as he brought a hand up to wipe the tears from Hudson’s cheeks.

“Spider-Man.”

“What? No way!” Auston feigned excitement. “Me too.” Maybe not the cartoon Spider-Man, but he grew up with the old movies.

“Really?” Hudson winced, one of his hands holding his stomach. Auston took notice of the action, continuing to rub the kid’s back.

“Yup. I have some stuff for you to change into, that’s a little more comfortable. And I got you a blanket and a stuffed animal. How’s that sound?”

“Good.” Hudson swallowed and nodded.

“I’ll go get your clothes, and you can change in here.” Auston stood up, quick to flush the toilet before he slipped out of the bathroom. He walked back down the hall to the living room, grabbing the change of clothes and turning to go back in the direction he came. He smiled softly at the sight of Hudson standing in the hall, waiting for him.

“Can you stay out here while I change?” Hudson slowly took the clothes from Auston’s hands. The hockey player nodded.

“I’ll be right outside the door.” Hudson slipped back into the bathroom at the promise. He pushed it halfway shut, and Auston leaned back against the wall opposite of the bathroom, waiting patiently. When Hudson came back out, he rubbed at his eyes and looked toward Auston expectantly.

“Where’s your other clothes?” Auston questioned.

“On the floor.” Hudson’s response earned a quiet chuckle from the man. He’d pick up the clothes later.

Auston led Hudson back down the hall, grabbing the blanket and the stuffed animal from the love seat.

“Go ahead and get comfy on the couch.” He watched Hudson climb up and lay down. Auston quickly draped the blanket over him, tucking the bottom under the boy’s feet and dropping the dinosaur stuffed animal on his chest. It earned a quiet and weak giggle from Hudson.

“We need one more thing.” Auston reached for the throw pillow at the opposite end of the couch. “Pick your head up.” Hudson did as told, sighing quietly after Auston slipped the pillow behind his head.

“Alright. I’m gonna go grab you something to drink.”

“You’ll be back?” Hudson asked quietly.

“I promise.” Auston slipped into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and rummaged through it before he found Sprite. Not Gatorade, but still good for sickness. He found a plastic cup to pour it in, with a few ice cubes. He popped a lid on the cup and found a straw, slipping it through the hole. Auston walked back into the living room, placing the cup down on the coffee table.

“Thanks, Aus.” Hudson whispered. Auston hated how miserable he sounded.

“No problem, dude.” He reached for the tv remote and turned the tv on. Auston flipped through various channels before he found Disney. “Spider-Man comes on after Frozen.”

Hudson whined out a complaint.

“I know, but I don’t think there’s much left of this movie.” Auston set the remote down.

“Can you sit?” Hudson whispered.

“On the couch?”

“No.. right here.” Hudson pointed to the floor by his head. “Please.” Auston made his way over and sat on the floor. He leaned back against the couch, his head resting on the front of the arm. Hudson let out a sigh before his hand rested on Auston’s shoulder.

“Mommy usually cleans.” He mumbled. “So nobody else gets sick.” Auston raised a brow.

“Do you want me to clean?” He turned his head to peek at Hudson.

“No. Just sit with me.” Auston nodded and slipped his phone from his pocket. He hadn’t heard from you. He set the device aside and reached a hand up to rest on the one Hudson placed on his shoulder.

“You’re gonna be alright, I promise. You just need a little time.”

“Auston?”

“What’s up?” Silence followed as Auston’s eyes settled on the tv, brow risen in expectancy. Waiting for Hudson to talk, but he never did. “Hudson?” Auston turned his head to look at the kid, who avoided eye contact. “What’s goin on, Buddy?”

“Don’t be mean, okay?” To say Auston was surprised was an understatement.

“I’d never. You know that.” He squeezed Hudson’s hand.

“Can I sit with you?”

“Yeah, come on.” Auston swiftly tugged the blanket off Hudson. He couldn’t imagine ever saying no or being mean about such a question. The boy needed comfort, and he was certain he could provide.

Hudson slowly slid off the couch, holding onto his dinosaur. He sat on the floor next to Auston and immediately leaned into his side while Auston wrapped the blanket around his legs.

“Better?” Auston whispered after Hudson got comfortable. The boy nodded. Auston draped an arm over his shoulders.

“Can I have my drink?”

“It’s not Gatorade, but it’s sprite.”

“That’s okay.” Hudson held his hands out as Auston grabbed the cup and handed it over. The boy took a few sips before he set the cup on the coffee table within reach. Auston felt Hudson heave out a breath, the kid’s full weight resting on his side. He peeked down at Hudson a few times to see his face focused on the tv. He may have gotten sick of Frozen from watching it all the time, but the boy still loved watching Elsa sing. He said she sounded like his mom. Auston didn’t quite believe it until he heard you sing Hudson to sleep one night.

Auston smirked the moment he heard Hudson’s soft whispers, quiet mumbled words following the tune on the tv. He moved his arm to rest on the couch cushion behind them, carefully smoothing down Hudson’s hair. He didn’t know what else to do other than let him rest. Soon, Hudson’s whispered words ceased, and he fell asleep.

Auston didn’t move. He didn’t want to. He was comfortable and happy where he was. It was an odd thing to be happy about, but he wanted to have these moments. He wanted to feel like Hudson was his kid. You only called because it was an emergency, but to know he was trusted with something like this, it made him happy. To take that stress off your shoulders, and to know a kid trusted him as much as he trusted his mother.

Auston lost track of the time as he sat there. His body started to ache, but he kept himself distracted with texting and watching whatever he could find in the tv. He was hopeful that Hudson had gotten whatever out of his system, seeing as he hadn’t woken up with any nausea. And you did say he didn’t stay sick long when he was throwing up, but Auston tried not to get too ahead of himself.

He felt far less worried when he heard the sound of a car door in the front drive. Auston sat up, placing his phone aside in hopes of greeting you from the floor. You opened the door slowly, stepping inside and wincing when your purse clinked against the door. Your eyes met Auston’s before trailing toward Hudson. It was relieving to see Auston had seemingly handled the situation well.

“He’s out?” You asked softly.

“Definitely.”

“If you give me like.. five minutes? I’ll change and put my stuff away, and you can go.”

Auston’s brow furrowed.

“I can stay.”

“Are you sure?” You pushed the door shut, slipping your flats off. Over time, you’d gotten much less argumentative over Auston’s consistent offers to be present.

“Yeah. He said you usually clean. If you want, you can come sit with him and I’ll clean.” You smiled and shook your head.

“He looks too comfy. I’ll clean real quick.” He didn’t touch much this morning, so it’ll be fast.” Auston nodded and flashed you a quick smile.

“Did he throw up at all when you brought him home?”

“Just once.”

“Alright.” Your eyes lingered on Hudson. “We’ll see how he feels when he’s up, and maybe I’ll make some soup.”

You couldn’t have been more grateful for the assistance. Able to clean without having to worry about Hudson waking up alone or getting sick without anybody around.

Another hour passed before you were carefully shaking Hudson awake, a sad sigh falling from your lips at the sight of his exhaustion.

“Momma?”

“I’m here.” You whispered, running a hand through his hair. Auston smiled at the simple interaction.

“How are you feeling, honey?”

“Okay.”

“Your stomach?”

“Okay.” Hudson shrugged.

“You wanna try to eat? And we can watch a movie?”

“Yeah.”

You and Auston shared looks before you stood to slip into the kitchen.

“Auston?”

“Still here.” Hudson reached out to grip the sleeve of Auston’s shirt, yawning and leaning back into his side.

“Why don’t you get up on the couch?”

“Pick me up?” Hudson peeked up at Auston, mustering up a pouty face.

“Fine.” Auston smirked, slowly standing up. He leaned forward and scooped Hudson up, setting him down on the couch. Hudson curled up beneath his blanket, setting his dinosaur aside.

“Good?”

“Yeah.”

“You mind if I go see your mom real quick?”

Hudson huffed and rolled his eyes. He had his mother’s sass even when he wasn’t feeling the best.

“I’ll allow it.”

Auston feigned shock before laughing quietly. His amusement brought a prideful smile to Hudson’s lips. He still looked exhausted and small, but he was feeling good enough for a bit of humor.

“Not too long though.” Hudson pointed a finger at him.

“Yes, sir.” Auston teased before he left the living room. He stood in the doorway of the kitchen for a moment before he made his way over to the stove where you stood.

“Goin’ good in here?” You jolted, almost hitting Auston before you turned to him.

“Jesus, Aus!” He shushed you immediately, laughing quietly.

“Sorry, sorry.” You smiled. “Shouldn’t you be watching a kid?”

“He told me I could come see you.”

“Oh he told you.” You taunted softly.

“He’s pretty gracious, actually.”

The both of you laughed softly, and you watched as Auston folded his arms across his chest, leaning his hip against the counter.

“What are you making?”

“Chicken soup.”

“Smells good.”

“It’s canned.” You shrugged, “nothing homemade.”

“My mom used to add paprika and garlic powder when I was sick. She said it helped.”

“I have a feeling Hudson won’t like paprika.” You laughed. Auston shrugged and reached for your arm.

“It did help though.” Auston informed you as he ran his hand up your arm, carefully stepping behind you to rub your shoulder.

“That feels nice.”

“We should go out soon.”

“I think for now we should just worry about Hudson.”

“That’s fine. I’m just bringing it up.” Auston brought his other hand to the opposite shoulder. Despite his words, you knew his persuasive methods.

“If you can find a babysitter, we’ll discuss it.” You entertained the idea.

“What about the woman that usually does it?Danielle?”

“She’s busy these next few weeks.”

“Mitch?” Auston tried.

“Will Steph be there?”

“That’s a fair point. I’ll have to ask when we decide a day.”

“If Steph isn’t there, I don’t think I fully trust Mitch with my kid.”

“Yeah me either.” Auston pressed a kiss to your head, pulling away at the sound of his name from the other room.

“Times up, Cinderella.” You teased, waving your hand in a dismissive manner.

“You almost done?”

“Soon, Aus. Go find a movie for us to watch.”

Auston nodded and slipped out of the kitchen.

“Alright, Hudsy. What movie do you wanna watch?” Hudson patted the empty space on the couch next to himself. Auston quickly sat down. Hudson handed his dinosaur over.

“Can you hold him?”

“Sure.” Auston tucked the green Dino between his arm and his hip as he picked up the tv remote from the floor, then the second remote for the streaming services.

“You wanna pick a movie?”

“Can we watch Cars?”

“Absolutely.” Auston worked on finding the movie while you finished the soup, pouring it into three separate bowls before carrying the first two into the living room. A plastic one for Hudson, and a glass one for Auston.

“Thanks, momma.”

“Yeah, this is awesome.” Hudson always had manners, but you liked to think Auston’s example helped solidify them. Auston’s example helped with a lot of things.

“I’ll be right back.” You disappeared back into the kitchen to grab your own bowl with a few paper towels. When you came back into the living room, you set the items on the coffee table, and walked over to the lights to shut them off. In turn, you flicked the lamp by the couch on.

“You still feeling okay, Hudson?” You asked as he sipped on a spoonful of soup.

“I think so.”

“Just don’t eat too fast, okay?” You added swiftly, and he nodded. You sat down on the couch opposite of Auston, Hudson in between.

“Do you care if your dinosaur sits on top of the couch for now?” Auston asked, “just while I eat?”

Hudson seemed to contemplate the idea before nodding, and Auston set the dinosaur on the top of the couch behind his head.

“Don’t let him fall.” Hudson spoke softly, glancing up at Auston.

“I won’t.” Auston pressed play on the streaming remote.

It only took Hudson a few minutes to eat what he wanted. After that, he’d asked you to set his bowl aside, and you did. He waited for you to finish eating before curling up against your side.

“Still feeling good?” You asked as you ran a hand over his hair.

“Yeah.” He paused. “Auston?”

“Sup?”

“Come on.” Hudson waved for him to come closer. Auston smiled and quickly closed the space between himself and the duo. Hudson got comfortable between the two adults, and Auston tossed his arm over the couch, his hand just barely resting on your shoulder.

“Am I going to school tomorrow?” Hudson asked, peeking up at you.

“It’s probably a good idea to keep you home and make sure you’re okay.”

“I thought you worked tomorrow?” Auston chimed in.

“I can do my stuff from home. But a sidekick is always welcome if you have time before your game.”

“Definitely.”

✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾❀✾

#nhl imagine #nhl x reader #auston matthews x reader #auston matthews blurb #auston matthews #auston matthews imagine

594 notes · View notes