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adourly · 16 hours

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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: office activities with alhaitham, zhongli, and diluc. 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: a little ooc with zhongli's part, reader is afab, semi public sex, adultery in zhongli's part, nothing too explicit, semi food play with diluc, no actual sex, let me know if there's more to add ! 𝐚/𝐧: hiyaa ! my requests are open for thirsts, fic ideas etc. ‹𝟹 also play miniskirt by aoa [] this was so bad im sorry

⋆ 𝓐lhaitham — 512 words.

you walked to alhaitham's office, holding a stack of blank contracts regarding his work. as you approached his door, you were delighted by some of your coworkers, waving and greeting you with good mornings. your black heels stopped at the front of his wooden door, as you took a moment to pull up your miniskirt, showing a little peek of your thighs with the black tights you were wearing.

you knocked on his door, a slight twinge of nervousness making your palms sweat. boss haitham wasn't up for small talk and wasn't a fan of long conversations either. as usual, he spends his days in his office and comes out occasionally for a cup of coffee.

''come in.'' he said, your hands twisted the doorknob to finally reveal the state he was in. his hair was messy, empty cups here and there, but all organized in one spot. he glanced up at you while you turned around to close the door, noticing how you swayed your hips.

''did you miss me?'' you asked him, walking up to his sad desk, and placing another pile of papers. you walk to the side of his table, taking all of the empty paper cups and stacking them on each other. ''do you ever come out of your office?'' ''when did you learn how to behave like that?'' he rebutted, staring at the loose button on your dress shirt, revealing a small sight of your cleavage.

''what do you mean?'' you ask, leaning on the desk, giving him a better view. he sighed and looked away, sorting the freshly printed stack of contracts you placed on his table. ''you know what i mean,'' he said, taking the cap off of his pen to start signing away again.

he was gone for 5 days, away on a trip to somewhere he didn't mention to anyone for a meeting with an important client. even though he treats everyone in his building like total crap.

it would be an understatement if you said you missed him. after all, you were his favorite. ''i just wanted to check up on you as your loyal operative,'' you said, going behind his chair and turning it around to face you. ''i'm busy.'' he warned, as your finger hooked his tie, pulling him towards you, straddling him.

''aw, i thought we could have some fun.'' you said, playing with his navy tie and silver buttons. his hands moved on instinct, placing both hands on your waist. he lifted you up and placed you on his desk, your miniskirt lifting up to give a view of your inner thigh.

''how does it feel?'' he mutters, unbuttoning the buttons left on your dress shirt. three of your colleagues walked past his office, thankfully his blinds were closed. you heard them laughing, probably talking about some random stuff that occurred to them in their day. ''acting like a slut to your coworkers frequent?''

he slips a hand under your shirt and fondled your boob. ''then, i'll make sure they know how needy you are for me.''

⋆ 𝓩hongli — 440 words.

zhongli was also a prolific worker, never seen tired or with eyebags coming out of his office. some would say he wasn't the one doing all of his work and had someone that does it for him.

it wouldn't be that surprising, considering his building looks like it came out of marvel. he would visit your little corner sometimes and would claim it was just for ''inspection''.

''how's that paper going?'' he asked, watching you from behind eagerly. you jump at his sudden approach, but you continue working. ''it's going great.'' you reply, your hand evidently shaking on your mouse. zhongli sighs, setting his cup of tea on your desk and leans in from behind.

your boss only had eyes on you. whenever you came to deliver papers to him in his office, purposely making you come back and forth to his space every so often.

some of your coworkers joke that you were hired as his maid, not his employee. but, that didn't sound half bad. you didn't mind being at his beck and call whenever he wanted, as long as he promised to hide it from everyone else.

thankfully, zhongli was good at it. small pecks here and there, light squeezes on your ass, his eyes were anchored to you and you only. you didn't know what you two were. you heard of these before, friends with benefits? no, you two have never even fucked yet.

you could feel him breathing as his hand landed on top of yours on the mouse. ''it's ctrl+d, darling.'' he spoke, doing the command flawlessly on your keyboard. his neck was close enough to your face, his strong versace eros making you clench your thighs. ''ah.. i forgot...'' you mutter, instantly distracted by scent.

his authority over you only made you wetter and crumble under him. this is wrong, you thought. a lot more because his wife talked to his employees in the other room, sharing laughter and smiles. a part of you was filled with regret, all of these moments you two share were forbidden;

but it only made your head spin more.

he hummed, his hand tightening around yours. ''be quiet for me.'' for a split second you were wondering what he was talking about. suddenly, you felt his warm breath on your neck. ''w-what?'' you ask, your breathing becoming rigid. ''try not to make noises, alright?'' he nips at your skin, occasionally licking and kissing here and there.

your hand landed on his head, gripping his hair, your mouth letting out a small moan that only he could hear. he whispered on your skin, ''good fucking girl.''

⋆ 𝓓iluc— 699 words.

ragnvindr was intimidating. he never spoke to anyone, and never needed anyone's help, he was a lone wolf when he worked. he's always the first one to arrive, the last to leave.

he was never interested in any celebration his employees would have, even if it would be his birthday. he prioritizes his work, but you knew a side of him no one else does. behind closed doors, his headstrong and fierce attitude was contrasted with his caring and subtle side.

he called your number and asked you to bring his delivered food from the lobby to his office. it wasn't out of the ordinary that your boss only eats once a day, many of his employees would bring him food but offer it to someone else instead.

''understood,'' you reply, leaving your chair and taking the elevator. his building was big and modern, a big sign with his brand tattooed on the front of it. you head down to the lobby and see the delivery guy.

''for y/n?'' your eyebrows knit together in confusion, but you take the food anyway. you could smell the scent of it from miles away. you walk up to the elevator and press floor 5, pondering why your boss would name it to you.

nonetheless, you make your way to his office, but a few of your coworkers are interested. ''hey n/n! is that for us?'' your friend jokes, as he waves to you. ''nope, you've already eaten all of the snacks sir ragnvindr provided.'' your friend scoffs at your joke, then giving you a smile as you smile back.

you finally reach his doorstep, knocking subtly. ''it's open.'' the man says from his desk, giving you permission lazily. you open the door. ''good afternoon, i have brought your food.'' you voice, walking up to his table to set the paper bag down.

''have you eaten yet?'' he asked, but you smiled. ''i'm full at the moment, but i appreciate your concern-'' ''sit,'' he demanded, you pulled the chair out of the table and sat across him. you were confused, first, he named the food after you, which isn't normal. usually, the name would be the company's name or his, but this time it was yours.

you were eager to know, but you kept silent in the meantime. he took out the sticky honey roast from the paper bag and took the plastic knife, slicing it in halves. your mouth waters at the sight, of your favorite food ever.

''eat with me.'' he asked, he grabbed the two places he must've requested from the restaurant and placed one in front of you. ''sir, i have work to do. i cannot take breaks in your office while my coworkers are out there working-'' diluc sighed, putting two slices of the roast on your plate.

''i heard this was your favorite,'' he said, completely disregarding what you said, as you smiled in defeat. diluc didn't waste time to take a bite out of it before you, a sparkle in his eye appearing from the taste. you cut out a piece and ate it, not noticing the honey spread on the corner of your lips.

diluc had noticed, ''come here.'' he asked. you tilt your head in confusion, ''why?'' ''just come here.'' you leaned on the table and faced him, your faces inching close to each other. his hand trailed on your cheek, rubbing his thumb on it, as it wandered down to your lip.

he scooped up the honey off the corner and licked it off clean. ''tastes sweet,'' he remarked, while his hand placed itself behind your neck, pulling your face in for a kiss. it was nice, slow, and passionate. you tasted the honey in his mouth, and you were sure he tasted it in yours too.

your hands landed on his shoulders, latching onto him as the kiss deepened further. you can see from the window the view of the paparazzi outside of the building and many people scattered around to take pictures beside it.

he then pulled away, licking his lips once more to savor your taste. ''but, you are sweeter. come here and let me feast on you.''

©adourly 5/11/2024 - do not copy, translate, modify my works.

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bravo4iscool · 2 days

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Hi! I was wondering if you could write a friends to lovers x reader for any of the 141 (you get to choose) where the reader is plus size and she avoids them touching her? Because she knows she's plus size and doesn't think this super attractive soldier would ever even like her, much less her body, and every time she is touched she kinda pulls away, but our soldiers are so down bad for her? 👀 And ultimately maybe she gets pulled onto a lap and immediately tries to get off? Smut or no smut, it's up to you!

Thank you lovely!! 💞💞

i like this. i like this very very much hehehehe. i chose simon (i always chose him, i really have to change that😭) (i hope you're okay with that tho. it's my personal headcanon that that man is a chubby chaser by heart lol).

as someone who's also plus-size i adore requests like this so much! i hope i could write it the way you imagined it :)

also, sorry this took me so long😭. i had a bit of a slump lol (also, please give me feedback on the smut part, i never really write smut🥲 and im a virgin lmao)

smut, plus-size!reader, unprotected sex, p in v, fem!reader, not proof-read!

(masterlist | join my tag list!)

REQUESTS/ASKS OPEN!!!

tag list - @yazt09 @blackhawkfanatic @bumblebeesfromvenus

"don't touch me simon," you mumble as you push his hands away. "you know i don't like that..." you shuffle away from him and clutch the little notepad you scribble down your customers orders.

he frowns—as always—and gives you a small smile. “‘m sorry lovie. i forgot.”

you nod and straighten your back. “your usual?” you ask, already knowing that he’ll answer with yes. and he does. then you look at the rest of the team, one eyebrow raised. it was rare that they took something else than their usual.

“positive,” price replies, as well as gaz.

“i’ll take whatever ye gimme,” johnny winks and you feel yourself blush. simon just rolls his eyes. he’s getting fed up with his best friend already.

you give johnny a honest smile and scribble something down. “10 minutes and i will be back with your drinks,” you tell them, turning to leave.

once you were out of reach johnny elbowed simon into the side, a devilish smirk on his face. “have ye told ye lassie that ye like her?” he wants to know, wiggling with his eyebrows.

“zip it johnny,” simon only grumbles, starting to bounce his knee. “i ain’t tellin’er nothin’.”

“but why? ye clearly like her.” johnny frowns. if he were in simon’s position he would’ve shot his shot weeks, if not months ago. you were—you were perfection. those curves, those hips and—god forbid—your stomach.

you were hypnotising and you didn’t even know it. johnny didn’t understand how simon could just sit and watch you. he would’ve done anything to get a taste of you, or even just a glance.

“she ain’t interested n’me johnny,” simon sighs after a moment of silence. “i won’t destroy what we have over my stupid feelings.” and with that the debate was over for simon.

before johnny could answer you return with the drinks, placing them down onto the table. “here ya go,” you smile.

“thanks lassie,” johnny grins, patting your hand. you immediately pull away.

you try to overplay it. “no problem. let me know if you need anything else.” you leave with hurried steps, praying you wouldn’t encounter touch again this evening.

‘fuck’ you thought when you realize: all seats were taken. this was not good, nope. you just wanted to turn around and leave without anyone taking a notice of you.

but then soap notices you, “ey lassie. com’ere!” he smiles and waves at you. with hesitant steps you walk in his and simon’s direction. giving a apologetic look to the other people. this was a movie night, not some coffee gossip round. it was rare that you were on base and on most occasions you tried to avoid it but johnny and gaz practically begged you to come so you had no other chance than to say yes.

a few moments later you stood in front of the group of men—your friends—unsure what to do. were you just gonna sit on the ground or… before you can even finish that thought a arm wraps around your waist and someone pulls you into their lap. you can‘t suppress a small yelp, your eyes blow wide.

“‘s j‘st me,“ simon whispers into your ear, sending a cold shiver down your spine. you wanted to leave. now.

“simon,“ you hiss. “let me go. i‘m way too heavy for you—“

but instead of following your request his arm around your waist only tightens. “i‘m a big guy. i can handle it,“ he only says in a low voice. with that the topic was done for him and you knew arguing wouldn‘t make sense. once simon was determined about something there was no way to chance his mind.

so, you sat in his lap the whole movie, squirming from time to time; afraid you were too heavy for him, afraid that you would hurt him in any way. meanwhile, his hands were caressing our waist, pulling you closer to him so you‘d stop wiggling around. if you wouldn‘t stop he‘d some have a problem…

beside simon johnny was throwing side glances at him, smirking when he noticed the struggles his best friend was having. he wished he was in that position… if only he‘d been a tad faster than simon you‘d sit in his lap right now and he knew he wouldn‘t be the same after than.

“y‘alright lassie?“ johnny asks as soon as the movie is over and the lights got turned on. your face was red and your pupils blown wide. you only manage a nod, trying your best to get off simon‘s lap as normal—and fast—as possible.

“i think—i think i‘ll go home now. i have work tomorrow morning,“ you smile, still embarrassed. “i hope i‘ll see you tomorrow or are you shipping out?“

“not for at least two weeks,“ simon answers and you nod and turn to leave but then he gets up too and you stop in your tracks. you raise your eyebrow at him and he shrugs. “‘m gonna get ya home,“ he simply says and you nod again.

“alright. see you soon guys,“ you wave your goodbyes to gaz and johnny.

once you and simon where out of reach johnny started to smirk. “ohhhh, he‘s tryna get laid,“ he laughs, glancing at gaz beside him.

“100%“ the other man agrees, hiding his laughter behind his hand. “the question is if she‘s understanding all the signs…“

you unlock your door, simon towering over you from behind, his presence like a burning sensation you couldn‘t seem to ignore. “and we‘re there,“ you chuckle, stepping aside. “you can, uh, leave now,“ you tell him but instead of turning around he takes a step inside your flat, closing the door behind him.

“what if i don‘t want to?“ he asks, slowly coming closer to you. “what…if i want to spend the night with you, mh?“ he‘s looking down at you, his hand itching towards to your face.

you swallow, trying to hold his gaze; it seemed impossible. “why would you want that?“ you want to know, unable to phantom any reason he—out of all men—would want to spend a night with you.

he smiles at your question and lowers his head. “because i like you,“ is his answer before he starts to trails kisses down your throat. your breath gets caught and your hands rush to grip his arms. what was happening right now? this must be a dream…

"if you want t'stop, tell me," he mumbles against your neck, slowly pushing you back until your back hits your drawer. you swallow but turn your head to give him more space. it just felt so good.

your breath hitches when he finds your weak spot. "i don't want to stop," you manage to say and you feel him smirk against your skin.

he scoops you up into his arms and you yelp. "that was what i wanted t'hear," he says and seconds later his lips collide with yours as he makes his way to your bedroom. you feel like a feather in his arms, so light and free.

"been wantin' t'do this f'r a long time," simon breathes against your lips when he gently drops you down onto your bed and he pulls back. "y'look so beautiful..." his eyes admire you and you start to blush. you weren't used to being appreciated like that. especially not by men like simon.

he sits up, kneeling in front of you. then he pulls off his shirt in a smooth motion, tossing it aside. your eyes widen and you swallow again. oh steaming jesus, he looked better than you thought–

and suddenly you get aware of your looks again. you try to hide behind your arms as fast as possible, not wanting simon to see but he beats you to it. with gentle hands he grabs your wrists and pulls them away. "why're you doing that, mh?" he wants to know and you avert your gaze.

"i...don't know..." you mumble. "i just–"

he cuts you off before you can finish, "y'think i don't find ya attractive, do ya?" your blush is answer enough and he bents down. "you're the most attractive woman i've ever laid m'eyes upon..." he tells you in a whisper, placing kisses upon your face.

"you don't–"

"oh, i mean it. with every fiber of my being," he, again, cuts you off, not wanting you to doubt his attraction to you. you were beautiful, etheral even, and he didn't know how other men didn't see it. "let me worship you," he pleads, kissing your lips.

he pulls slightly back again and looks in your eyes. he wanted your consent before continung. if you'd say no, he'd stop. if you'd say yes, he would ravish you.

you hesitate for a second before you drag him back down by his neck and press a kiss to his lips. "please," you choke out, looking at him with hooded eyes.

he smiles, his hands slipping beneath your shirt, pushing it upwards. "your wish is my command love." with gentle hands he starts to undress you, trailing kisses all over your body. he wanted to you to feel good about yourself, to feel attractive.

and with every passing moment he was itching down towards your core, smirking when he feels you twitching and shuddering.

“si—simon,” you moan when his lips ghost over your clothed cunt.

he does it again, looking up at you through hooded eyes. “shhhh,” he coos, his tumb caressing your thigh. “b’good f’r me, will ya?” he was straining himself to not rip your clothes off when he started undressing you piece by piece. he wanted to cherish you, burn the image of you sprawled across your bed—naked—into his mind. who knew when he’d be able to see you like that again?

it felt like a haze, the way he was undressing and worshipping your body, his eyes rarely leaving yours. he wanted to you feel seen, to feel lusted after because that was exactly what he was doing.

he came face to face with you again, his lips finding yours while his hand cupped your pussy. your breath hitched. “so ready for me,” he chuckles, his tumb carefully starting to stimulate your clit.

a whine escapes you when he pulls his hand back after a few moments and he can’t suppress a smirk. “oh, ya needy, aren’t ya?” you only manage a nod, your mouth falling open when you feel him slipping one finger inside. “gon’ work ya well open first, love,” he tells you before he starts to litter you with kisses again.

with a steady rhythm he pumps his finger in and out of you, trying to pay attention to your body’s reaction as best as possible. he wanted to make this about you and you only.

he was sucking bruises onto your skin while moans dripped past your lips. oh, he felt like he was in heaven. “keep makin’ them sounds f’r me love,” he mumbles as he starts to hump your bed. his dick was painfully hard by now and he needed to feel some relief.

you gasp and writhe and whine, grabbing his arm to feel something between your hands. “please simon,” you cry out with your back arching off the mattress. “i wanna—“ he shuts you up with a kiss.

“i know what ya want.” and exactly that is the moment your orgasm ripples through you. a dragged out moan leaves your mouth and your fingernails bore into the flesh of his arms. “j’st like that,” simon coos, carefully removing his hand from your cunt.

you gasp for air as you come down from your high, still not 100% sure if this was real; because it didn’t feel like it. you release simon’s arms from your grip, swallowing when you saw the marks you left.

in the meanwhile simon fully undressed himself, his painfully hard cock finally getting set free. he looked at you and a smirk tugged at his lips when he noticed you staring. he tugged at his cock before he crawled back onto the bed to hover about you.

you look up at him, unsure of what to do. it’s been probably years since you’ve last had sex. it wasn’t that much of a regular thing in your life.

“ya ready?” he asks you after he connects your lips in a gentle kiss. you nod and he carefully starts to open your legs further. “i’ll be gentle, yea?”

simon’s hands caress your thighs before he aligns his cock with your entrance and trains his eyes on you as he starts to push himself inside.

your mouth falls open and your hands find their way back to grip onto his arms. a tear slips past your eye and a loud moan drags past your lips. “simon—oh my god!”

he grunts, doing his best to hold himself back from restlessly pounding into you. he didn’t want to hurt you. “no god ‘ere love. only me.” he bends down to kiss you and one of his hands starts to stimulate your clit again.

when he fully bottomed out it took all of his self control to not come immediately. he’s dreamed of this for months, years even and not it was finally happening.

“takin’ me s’good,” simon whispers in your ear, slowly pulling his hips back, making you whine before he pushes them forward again, pulling another moan out of you. “this pussy was made for me, huh.” a cocky grin was on his face.

you nod and babble, too overwhelmed by that pleasure that was so unknown to you. “wanna be good for you,” you cry, clutching his arm with your hands. “please simon.”

he starts to trail kisses down your throat while he keeps his thrusts in a steady rhythm. he felt his orgasm building but he wouldn’t come before you didn’t. this wasn’t about him and his pleasure, this was about you.

you moan, “oh—oh—“ when you feel the knot in your stomach tightening. “i’m gonna come simon,” your voice trembles.

“i know,” he grits out as he fastens his thrusts and keeps stimulation your clit. the way you were clenching around him had him seeing stars. you were so close.

and then he pushes you over the cliff, your orgasm rippling through you with a force you didn’t know as possible. your vision fades to black and your mouth falls open as simon fucks you through your orgasm.

he’s trying his best to keep his composure when you clench around him, almost milking him but he pushes through, managing a couple sloppy thrusts before he comes with a deep moan, fully burying himself inside you.

his eyes are closed as he tries to take a deep breath, a faint ‘i love you’ leaving his lips.

(i’m sorry the end is like that. i’m terrible at endings🧍🏼. i didn’t know how to properly cut this😭)

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littlexdeaths · 3 days

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hi mari!!

first of all i LOVE the way you write! i love how you write eddie so much and i had a request for whenever you get the time and if you want to write it… so, i saw this spicy video (iykwim) and there was this thing that honestly made everything so much hotter. when the guy took off his girls panties he hung them on himself (he was already hard obviously) and he then f*cked her like that until they finished even on different positions……. i was speechless i have never seen anything like it and it was hot as hell!

so i was thinking of maybe you writing something like that where eddie surprises the reader by hanging her panties/thong on his hard pack and doing the reader like that. i just thought that was such an eddie/dilf!eddie thing to do i had to tell you hehe tell me what you think👀🤭

hi darling!!

and thank you so much, that really means a lot to me 🥹

also, im so sorry this definitely isn’t what you asked for, but this thought is just stuck in my head and i had to get it out. besides i needed something to make me giggle today.

so i hope this okay 🥺

18+ ONLY MDNI

warnings: eddie is the biggest dork of all time, allusions to oral & sex, dick talk lmao

“Eddie, take them off please?” you whine, as he continues to brush his fingers over the elastic band.

He’s been at this for the last twenty minutes, touching you over your now soaked underwear. Before teasingly running his fingers back up along the seam.

And in turn driving you absolutely mad.

His eyes meet yours, mischief clouding his irises as he hooks his fingers beneath the elastic. He tugs them down slowly, letting his fingers graze along your thighs as he goes.

Once they are finally off you breathe a sigh of relief, spreading your legs wider for him. But he’s not looking at you now. Instead his gaze is focused on the pair of panties he has hooked around his index finger.

He swings them in a circle, ignoring your groan of annoyance, “Come on, Ed, what are you doing?”

If he hadn’t been teasing you for so long you might find his actions funny, but right now all you wanted was his face buried between your thighs.

“Just… hold on a second, babe.” He says, attempting to hold back a laugh. “I wanna try something.”

You watch in confusion as he suddenly pulls his hardened cock from the confines of his boxers. That confusion turns to mock horror as he hooks your panties around his shaft.

Eddie places his hands on his hips as he begins to swing them in a circle. The article of clothing begins to swing slightly, but it’s his cock that is gaining more momentum.

“Seriously, what are you doing?” You can’t help but laugh at the utter ridiculous display in front of you.

Your boyfriend peeks up at you from under his lashes, as he continues to swing his dick around even faster. His tongue pokes out from between his teeth, as a familiar look of concentration passes over his features.

“What’s it look like, sweetheart? Tryin’ to see if I can swing ‘em in a circle.”

#freaks got mail 📮#nonnies 🫧#the freak writes 🫧#also i can definitely expand on this idea in another lil blurb if you want #or continue this one?#idk im in a silly mood #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x fem reader #eddie munson x female character #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fanfic #eddie x you #eddie munson x female reader

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achveronx · 3 hours

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Pookie could you do Serval with a fem! S/O who has a limp and is often made fun of cause of it?

(No im not basing this on my who told you that ha ha ha ha ha.....)

I'm here for you

Synopsis - Serval with a female!reader who has a limp and finding out she's getting made fun of it

Warnings/content - Men dni!!, fem!reader(prns not mentioned), hurt/comfort, mentions of bullying, use of pet names, protective!serval, use of swear words, insecure!reader, tons of comfort, established relationship, description of blood, possible grammar mistakes, not proofread - wc: 1.3k

A/N: I had to search what i limp was, but im hoping i wrote the correctly, but lmk if i did smth wrong! (i love serval sm, shes my fav 4 star as of rn). This is probably my favorite fic so far, but is quite long.. This turned out way more angsty then intended-

Tags: no one yet

Serval loves you to death, that's for sure. She doesn't care that you have a limp. She loves you in any way (even if you were a worm). Serval has only been kind and helpful towards you. Getting ice packs for you whenever your pain gets to bad, making sure you do certain exercises to not make it worse, making sure you also get as much rest as possible, etc.

You really appreciate Serval for helping you, but it makes you feel like a burden to her. Which is the reason why you haven't told her yet that you are getting made fun of. You don't wanna burden her any further . Serval seemed to notice something was off with you and asked what is bothering hoping to help you with it, but instead you answer that it's nothing. Serval didn't believe that one bit, but she didn't wanna make you uncomfortable so she didn't pry any futher

You thought you could keep this away from her, untill they went to far. The person who made fun of you pushed you a bit to hard that you fell on the ground, gaining a nasty wound on your knee. You mentally cursed when you saw blood dripping on the concrete ground. You knew well enough you couldn't hide this from Serval, no matter how hard you tried. Your bully was already long gone when u got up, probably because they knew that they screwed up. You too knew that they won't get away without facing Serval's wrath.

You stumbled into Serval's workshop hoping she was anywhere else but here, but that came all crashing down when you heard the all familar cheery voice of Serval.

‘‘Oh hey babe! I've been looking for you everywhere.’’ Serval exclaimed with a small sigh of relief

‘‘Ah, sorry if you worried Serv. I-I was just.. uhm taking a walk!’’ you replied trying not to sound like you're hurt. You heard the sound of her heels approaching you. ‘‘No, no, it's fine love. I was just wondering where you we-’’ Serval's words where cut off when she saw the state you where in.

She immediately rushed to you, worry written all over her face. "What happenend? Are you okay?" asked with visible concern in her voice.

‘‘I'm fine Serval, i just tripped’’ you tried muttered trying not to wince. ‘‘Well clearly you're not fine, you knee is fucking bleeding!’’ she answered with harshness evident in her tone. You flinched at her tone and that did not go unoticed by Serval. Her demeanor softened, but the harshness still remained. ‘‘I'm sorry (name).. i didn't mean to scare you like that, but you're not fine. Your knee is bleeding, so let me take care of it. Okay?’’ she replied with the same gentleness she always treated you with.

‘‘I- Okay..’’ you mumbled in defeat, knowing she won't take no for an answer. Serval carefully guided you to a chair and asked you to stay still while she went out to go get a first aid kit. It took a few minutes till Serval came back with the aid kit and seated infront of you. She first cleaned the blood off, then carefully inspected the wound. You heard her curse under her breath.

‘‘The wound is quite deep, i need to put on some antibiotic oil on there to refrain from it infecting, so it's gonna sting for a second.’’ Serval explained. You grimaced at the words, but nodded nevertheless. Serval gave you thigh a small squeeze of reassurance. She grabbed the antibiotics and smeered it on her hands.

‘‘Okay, i'm gonna put in on now.’’ she spoke. You winced at the sting that you felt. ‘‘I know baby. It hurts, but i'm almost done.’’ Serval cooed. You just let out a small hum. When Serval was done putting the antibiotic oil on you wound, she wrapped a bandage around it, to prevent it from bleeding.

‘‘All done! see that wasn't so bad now was it gorgeous?’’ Serval spoke with a soft smile adorning her face. ‘‘I suppose it wasn't to bad’’ you mumbled. Serval gave you small peck on the cheek, before letting out a sigh. ‘‘Hey (name), i wanna talk about something i have noticed.’’

Your breathe hitched, you really hoped she won't ask you about the one thing you tried keeping away from her. ‘‘I wanna talk about how you have been acting lately.’’ Serval continued. Eveything started to freeze in time for you for a second before snapping out of it.

‘‘Uhm.. uh, I don't know what you mean Serval.’’ you nervously said avoiding eye contact with her.

‘‘I feel like you are hiding something from me (name).’’ Serval muttered. ‘‘You have been acting off for a few weeks now and it's worrying me..’’ she explained, taking hold of your hand. You bit the inside of your cheek debating whether to tell her or not. After a dreading silence you spoke up: ‘‘I'm sorry for worry you Serval, but theres a something i was supposed to tell you way sooner..’’ you murmured trying to hold back a sob.

‘‘You probably want to know why i always wear sweaters, why i act so nervous and all. Well uhm.’’ you took a deep breath. ‘‘I have been made fun of behind your back. That's also the cause of the wound of my knee..’’ you avoided eye contant with Serval to prevent from the dam that's holding you back from becoming a sobbing mess.

You continued speaking: ‘‘The sweaters i used were to hide the bruises i got and the reason i'm always s nervous is because i didn't wanted you to find out..’’ you shakily admitted.

Serval was speechless. She had so many questions, but the lump in her throat made her unable to ask them.

‘‘Why..?’’ was the only word Serval could muster up. She grabbed her girlfriends chin. The sight of your saddened eyes made her heart shatter. ‘‘Why?’’ she repeated while wiping away the tears in the corner of your eyes that you didn't even notice they were there.

‘‘I-I just.. I’’ you stumbled over your words holding back tears. ‘‘I didn't wanna burden you any further that i already am. That's why i didn't told you..’’ you muttered while a sob came out of your mouth.

‘‘Burden me..? what do you mean by that name.’�� Serval questioned

‘‘I feel like a burden to you Serval. You already waste your time by taking care of me! I feel like if i told you this it would add more weight on your shoulder than you already have.’’ you sobbed

‘‘Oh baby.. you were never a burden nor did i waste my time on you. You know why? It's because i love you okay. I care about you, more than you know. You wll never be a burden to me, do you understand that (name).’’ You weakly nodded, to exhausted to answer.

Serval pulled you in a hug and made a circular montion on your back. You sobbed into her shoulder, sputtering apologies over again. Serval hushed you before kissing your forehead. ‘‘Don't apologize (name). You did nothing wrong.’’ Serval reassured you while comforting you

After a couple of minutes passed. Your sobbed turned into sniffles still flushed against Serval. ‘‘I-I still feel bad for not telling you sooner..’’ you murmured

‘‘(Name) please look at me.’’ Serval gently asked. You reluctantly pulled away from Serval's embrace. ‘‘Theres nothing to feel bad about. I'm proud of you that you even told me. Just promise me that you will tell me if this happens again and remember that i'm here for you.’’

‘‘I promise to tell you.’’ you rasped. ‘‘I love you Serval.’’ you mumbled while nuzzling back into her shoulder.

‘‘I love you too (name).’’ Serval softly whispered back.

Reblogs are appreciated!!

@𝒂𝒄𝒉𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒙★

#★achveronx writingメ #serval x reader #serval x fem reader #serval hsr #serval landau #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr x reader #x fem!reader #lesbian #wlw

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soracities · 22 hours

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Me and my gf of 4 years broke up recently and the last few months, as things got worse, I was writing really well. You know that Siken tweet about the vocabulary of loss being the dictionary? But now that we've finally broken up I cant write anything.

I've always used writing to process things - I need to write stuff, to sound it out, to see if thats how I feel. I don't know what's going on. I assume I'm just not feeling my feelings but I don't know how to do it.

I'm sure I'll be fine, this is not an SOS, but do you have any tips? It feels like Im stuck and its frustrating.

Love ur blog and your kind words, stay safe, have fun, X

I'm really, really sorry about your breakup anon, and I'm sorry too that you're going through such a frustrating an difficult time in the wake of it all. Someone asked about writer's block a while back which I answered here, though I don't know how much of it will help in this particular situation.

I think it's interesting that you make a distinction between processing your feelings and actually feeling them--why are they different? do you think you're removed from your feelings when you're writing to process them? And if so, is writing in order to process something actually putting you in touch with the real, raw emotion or simply breaking it down without fully acknowledging and being present with those feelings?

I ask because I'm also someone who needs to write and sound my feelings out sometimes, but I've found I'm also someone who runs a deep risk of intellectualising my feelings when I do write about them--writing, even when processing, happens at a distance for me and in some ways I've found it's more an escape than a confrontation; my feelings, when I write about them (and I rarely do it because of this, and other reasons), turn into a narrative that circumvents the simple acknowledgement of "x happened. I feel y," and moving on. I'm not saying that this is you, but as someone who often has difficulty feeling my feelings, even through personal writing, it may be worth asking if your writing, much as it helps you process, might also be a way of avoiding a necessary confrontation with your emotions and just sitting with them, before writing about them. As I said, feeling my feelings is something I struggle with, but a dear friend shared this chart which has done wonders for me, so maybe it can help you, too (I hope)

I think it's also important to acknowledge that 4 years is a long, long time to be with someone and then no longer be with them. And if things, as you said, were particularly bad in the past few months before it happened, it could simply be that you, your mind, needs a period of stillness and recovery to full come to terms with what has happened. You have to let the reality of it all settle in, and maybe you cannot write as you used to right now because that settling hasn't fully happened yet; some things don't need to be analysed in the moment--they simply need an acknowledgement and that alone is enough to give some breathing space. I don't know if any of this will help you, anon, but I sincerely hope you can take something from it. I hope in time you are able to come back to yourself in the healthiest way for you 💗

#ask #Anonymous #notes from elsewhere #please ignore the reddit mens lib thing

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toomuchracket · 2 days

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thinking about matty's brief stint working in cafe nero... being coworkers when ur like 20 and he pisses u off because he is so incompetent but u also have a lot of fun... you know those tiktoks about friends working together so very simple tasks become a 2-person job (im talking mopping the floor, and his job is standing next to you and moving the bucket around, so closing takes 2x longer than it should)... until your manager realises she shouldn't schedule the two of you together anymore and matty, now entirely disinterested in the job, quits. (this could actually be very early flatmate if you wanted... she gets him the job maybe)

this is so fucking funny he would so be like that. also though like you said - flatmate coming into the shop you work in part-time when you guys first meet and he's like "oh you're hiring? maybe i'll apply", and you're like "no you'll distract me and then we'll never get put on shifts together and really what would even be the point of you working here if not to hang out with me". like, CLOCKED. and matty's all flustered like "that's not the ONLY reason i'm considering applying" and you're like "no? damn. it would be mine if it was the other way around"; mind you, you've not been friends for that long, so matty literally does not know how to cope when you say that bless him lmfao. again, truly ridiculous that it took you seven years to get together (and another five-ish to get married). this was not at all what you asked but it's where we've ended up, so... yeah. sorry lol <3

#mads answers asks #matty asks #fluff asks #flatmate!matty

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koqabear · 19 days

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You know, in your page, the description "Stay a while, come and chat" was it? You know what I read that as? "Stay a while, come and EAT" 💀

-🧁

alkdghhkg i think your subconscious is trying to tell you something....

y'know,,, sometimes i think about changing it, but then i never know what to change it to, and then i just give up. plus, i fear it's been too long and you're all probably used to it saying that, so. why change it now?

#sometimes i see all the cute and clever and poetic things #people have as their descriptions #and i think “omg i should do smth like that too!”#but then. my mind blanks.#it'll stay like this till the end of time i fear #rambles #koqabear asks #🧁anon!#also im so sorry for taking so long on your asks

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askchuuyanakahara · 5 months

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why cant he go to the cinema :(

Dazai: "Hmf.."

@megaroniandcheez

Chuuya: "You're acting really strange, y'know."

Chuuya: "After all, you don't get all fussy when I go out with Akutagawa or Kajii."

Chuuya: "Hey.."

Chuuya: "You haven't made any dumb or stupid remarks in the past 5 minutes and you're awfully warm.."

#long post #ask #update #anonymous #megaroniandcheez #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #bungo stray dogs #skk #soukoku #(Oops neither of them can escape from this one now)#(Aaaand I'm off to take a week break cause it's the holidays and all)#(Have fun with this cliffhanger(?))#(Yeah youre welcome!!)#(also sorry if the qualitys kinda off Im not working off my usual computer so I dont have all my brushes n stuff)

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cutie-lumi · 4 months

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Every femstars artist I've seen draws Mugi with big boobs and I'M NOT COMPLAININGJFKSNGK I just love how she has the biggest boobs and then nat is like.... Flat.. I feel kinda rude saying thatdbsknf😭 I love them so much ❤️❤️

I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE DRAW THEM LIKE THIS!!!!!!! it's my ultimate hc for their bodies ever since I?? started shipping them ig?? Fem!Tsumugi not caring about her looks yet being well endowed while Fem!Natsume is like. always looking super pretty, but being flat as hell (and a little bit jealous of mugi's overall body proportions)? SIGN ME UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP IT'S MY FAVE SHIP DYNAMIC. I EAT IT ALL UP ALL THE TIME. I love seeing other artists having this as their hc as well!! Imo it suits them so much OUGHHHHHHH i need to thank all the artists who also draw them like this bc you're the reason why im so well fed. thank u for your service.

#IM SO SORRY FOR TAKING TO LONG TO RESPOND TO YOUR ASK ANON #i know it's been. almost a month. but im trying my best ok #do you ever think about how fem mugi probably has THEEEEEEEEEEE most perfect body proportions.#she's a perfect idol #yet she doesnt give a SHIT about it #which just makes her even more perfect imo #but natsume? she probably looks FLAWLESS on a daily basis. she'll be dead tired but you won't notice bc she's always wearing makeup #i also think natsume would have like. more of rectangular body shape while mugi's would be an hourglass #i have lots of thoughts #i'll try to answer more asks with drawings later!! i just need to draw them first JGHFJDHGDFKG and it might time some time. but bear with m

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chalkeater · 1 year

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ur art is crunchy /pos !!! how do you have the confidence to use stuff that isnt pencil and cant rlly be erased if mistakes are made?

make more mistakes

ACTUAL ANSWER BELOW because it got too long. oops lol

anyway. i wrote “DO IT ON PURPOSE” because when it comes to doing a whole drawing with ONLY a pen- you gotta force your brain get creative- at least practice. in other words- work with what you have. it’s basically like solving a problem every few seconds-

because sometimes my hand eye coordination glitches for a split second. or maybe my hand shook or maybe the line is actually shit looking. but instead of scrapping the thing entirely i gotta to try and make it work. ok so if my line looks like crap here maybe i can make it a Part of the drawing by making everything look messier. OR maybe i can even just. hide it!! by coloring a thicker line along it too!!

you can actually HIDE a LOT of mistakes with a pen without erasing anything. and sometimes the mistakes are part of the art- like when i see the most beautiful art online and i see an uncolored pixel. what matters is your final output not the things you cant change now or mean nothing in the big picture

honestly going from sketch to lines and rendering with a pen is about weight control (like with a pencil- sketching yk) and not beating yourself up. in order to gain the “confidence” you gotta absolutely ANNIHILATE the need for 200% perfection. because theres beauty in a mess.

anyway so. when you get the basic stuff down like “in order to to make less mistakes with pen stuff- make sure youre used to what youre drawing already!!!” or “draw/doodle stupid shit with your pen and make it (pen) a PART of you and not some scary beast (pen)

i think it all stems down to forgiving yourself and just having fun. having fun is always my motto. if you ever go “oh no i made a mistake!!!” imagine me yelling “WHO CAAARRESSS!!!!!!!! (#love #positive)” in your EAR

#deltarune #susie deltarune #myself #ask #susart #GAHH SORRY ITS SO LONG OR SOMETHING #we have chronic ‘if you ask any of us a question ill literally take 5 paragraphs to answer it bc idk detail and context or shit’#ok bye how this helps????#mintyblitz #i would include more of our pen stuff but idk whats worth showing lol #bc we sketch with pens a lot. actually fucking hate sketching with pencils sometimes because ughh #when youre studying fine arts and have 500 black drawings ???? um. yeah. no. i dont want to touch a pencil everr AGAIN!!!!#GOD GRAPHITE EVERYWHERE!!! on my shirt on my FACE!!!#of course we still do painting and drawings with pencils and then line them after #but if im gonna doodle?? yeah. pen #also not to be a pen apologist but when a sketchbook ages the pencils fade #but pens are fucking awesome because water and air wont let it fade away #we actually use waterproof BALLPOINT pens (our fountain pen oviously is not waterproof)#(Not aponsored but buy panda oens theyre so cheap and you can paint watercolor on them girls)#anyway so the worst our penned sketches get is like. a lottle bleeding but thats cool ask in a sketchbook #pencils?? gone. blank canvas.#pencils are great but i need people to understand how convenient oen is #also pen for filling in form?? but can be used to draw? versatile. she can do anything

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widevibratobitch · 6 months

Text

so i am singing that vitellia in the end... but at what fucking cost.

'you gotta sing this softer'

'what'

'this is mozart'

'this is vitellia'

'this is mozart'

'im singing about how much i hate this mf and want him dead before the end of the day'

'this is mozart'

'i wanna murder a guy'

'this is mozart'

'...'

'softer. gentle. mozart'

'...ok'

#they're killing me here #i already bargained for ONE (1) note in chest (thank you so so much that i am ALLOWED to sing an A3 in chest voice <333) and now THIS #THIS is why people hate mozart. fuck you.#i recorded that rehearsal and the first version sounds SO MUCH BETTER. after i did what she asked me to do its just. so fucking boring.#i hate it here #i love this duet so much but frfr im not sure i wanna do it if i have to do it on their terms.#also like sorry to be a bitch but you're a pianist girl. just stick to your stuff and let me take care of mine.#just because you're playing this like you're constipated because tHiS iS mOzArT doesnt mean the rest of us dont care either.#its possible i never will get the chance to sing the entire vitellia so i want to do justice. as much as im able. to this one chance i get #it took me A Long While to deal with the fact that i wont be able to bark that 'indegno' and 'regno' like i always envisioned.#but like. ok. whatever. i can still make it Entertaining. THIS however. no. no fucking way.#and its not even about me being a big-headed know-it-all who thinks she's better than everyone because. lol and lmao clearly im Not #but this is about having a fucking SOUL. its about actually taking the libretto into consideration too. its about trying to figure out #WHY mozart wrote it the way he did. like sorry but this is another fiordiligi case where its CLEAR that the amplitudes the crazy jumps #are there FOR A REASON. the reason is HE WANTED A CONTRAST. some fucking EMOTION. he sure as hell didnt want it to be Soft And Gentle.#i know it because i talked to him and he told me im right about everything as always and you can eat shit girl bye #grrrrrrrr im so angry #i knos i sound so arrogant here but please. please i just want to make this music fun and enjoyable. i just dont want it to be boring #please understand my vision im begging you

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wavesmp3 · 4 months

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shawna!!! i picked up “the sea is yours to take” and genuinely so In love with your world building! can i know how you plotted the story out or how this world even emerged :OO

omg genuinely so excited to answer this ask, like you have no idea. i pulled out my laptop for it hehe

so as a disclaimer i must start by saying that i first started creating this fic and the world around it in 2019 (which can you believe was 5 years ago lol) AND i haven't really revisited all my notes since i was working heavily on this world in 2020 AND my notebook with all the details and brainstorming i did is at my parents' house and therefore do not have access to for the time being...

all of this to say that i am a little muddy on all of the nitty gritty details, but we continue forward nonetheless!

so as i said the initial idea that turned into this world came to me in the summer of 2019 in a silent chapel in the form of this drabble

(which, a note on the silent chapel part lol, i'm not a very religious person and i had never been to one before that but i think going to a place like that and thinking of the drabble there is why the piece has a strong emphasis on religion and like religious institutions, a lot of which was inspired by catholic ideologies such as the very idea of seven sins and seven gifts. and a lot of the emphasis on the religious beliefs of that world might not be as obvious in 'the sea is yours to take' (tsiytt) but it has more importance in the other installations (read: the world is ours to remake, posted as an original work somewhere on my blog as well as the crown is his to wear which was supposed to be the third and final installation that i never got around to writing rip)

but back to the point -- the drabble kind of set up the main plot which, to put it briefly, is that there is a king who is up to no good so much so that his own son is looking to overthrow him.

(note that the drabble was slightly different when originally posted and had been edited after the fact once i had created the entire world and overarching plot, but it was mainly the same as it stands right now apart from the naming of a couple things. fun fact: the gifts were called the virtues in that drabble)

and from there i kind of let my mind run wild.

i can't remember if i did most of the plotting/creation of that world during 2019 summer or if i did it during 2020 summer, but the main point is that i had almost a full year of just on and off thinking about this piece and this world

so from there (ignoring the timeline of all this world building) it was mainly just figuring out the answers to a whole bunch of questions like: why is the son trying to overthrow the king? what is the 'no good' that the king is up to? why did the prince seek out this other character in the drabble? what does that character know that can be of help? how or why do they specifically know it?

and it continued and continued like that for a long time until i had a pretty good understanding of what i wanted the plot to be. and because of the nature of the overarching plot with the plans to overthrow the king it kind of also did a lot of the world building too. i again had to ask and answer questions like why are all the sins and gifts apart from fortitude dead? why would the nomads know something that the rest of this world doesn't? why have the nomads ceased communication with the rest of this world? and a ton of other questions and answers that literally wouldn't even make sense with what is discussed in tsiytt but kind of helped informed what tsiytt needed to set up for following installations to make sense.

(note: kind of hate the naming of the nomads and the nomads land, it just feels wrong and a bit offensive of a word to use in the context that it is. i was young and really the only thing i was thinking about was the fact that it sounded like no mans land)

anyways this whole lengthy explanation is again just to say that i knew a certain couple of scenes needed to happen to drive the plot forward: like not knowing why fortitude sent the prince away, fortitude killing lord seth, the ending scene, and then a couple others that i won't say because they're probably spoilers.

and from there i just got to add in scenes to build out the love story as well as the characters. i wasn't following a very serious outline (especially when i started to write in may 2020) but rather just following my heart and letting words and scenes come out as i was writing them. but then because i was just thinking about this world and this piece so much i started to think up scenes that i wanted to write that would only happen much later. and so from there i was following a very loose outline. which was really just a whole bunch of bullet points of scenes i wanted to add. like they were so unserious. and to show how unserious, here is a sc i pulled of them (thank you google doc version history)

LOL

anyways i think that's kind of all i have to say right now, but i could really talk about that piece and that world for years, there is so much depth that will unfortunately never leave my little brainstorming notebook. even details like the zalazar river have so much more history and meaning to it than is explored or even brushed on in tsiytt.

i really apologize that this got so long (and if you can believe it, this is me trying to keep it short) and if it makes absolutely no sense. but if you have more questions or things you wanted to discuss or ask pls pls pls go right ahead. my ask box or dms are always open!! i love any excuse to talk about this world and these characters. they're my heart.

#asks #the sea is yours to take #the world of gifts and sins #i wonder if i'll ever pick this work back up #also moni im loving your new icon!!!#sorry if this didnt even answer your question also #its been so long since i really digged into this world #when i remembered back to it it felt like looking through a massive library and not knowing where to start lol #another side note that some of this world and the style of the writing/world building is inspired by kirsten cashore #and specifically fire and graceling by her #i def rec those books #theyre some of my absolute faves

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axolotlclown · 28 days

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Would you happen to have some studies to back up the "more than one coffee means you're addicted" thing, please? Pretty sure I've seen that disproven as a lens to understand addiction through at all

~ 🪴

Hey! So sorry I never saw this anon. It never appeared in my notifs and I'm really bad about checking my askbox.

You have asked a question that falls in line with a field I am very passionate about! I found some interesting articles in my school library. I'm going to go ahead and write this response, but I'm still waiting on access to a few journals. I'll have to convert those ones to PDFs as they are likely behind paywalls.

Anyway, here's my long post where I intend to rant about a lot of different barely related topics. Caffeine addiction is one of those really controversial but historically significant subjects in psychology!

So let me start off with how to read and break down a journal. It's one of those things where if you don't go to college and specifically major in a research related field, no one ever teaches you how to do it. That sucks.

So when you're looking at a journal, the first thing you want to do is background check the author. What school did they go to? What degrees do they have? (For research, they should have a Ph.D. no matter what.) What is their current place of employment?

Often companies, or other private businesses, will commission someone to do some research and fudge the results to make that company look better. We saw this recently in regards to gender affirming care. The United States House of Representatives had proposed legislation to restrict gender affirming care for transgender youth. The Republican sponsor of the bill had presented a single piece of research that he claimed was significant. The research found that transition regret rates were somewhere in the 30% range. (I don't remember exactly and I know that I could quickly look it up, but I just spent the past two hours reading addiction research. I'll find it tomorrow.) Upon looking into the author and the sponsors of this research, psychologists found that the journal the congressman presented was commissioned by a conversation therapy center in Florida. The research held obvious bias, poor peer review, and inconclusive results. The bill didn't pass. I'm not sure they even voted on it, actually.

Anyway, this is why we need to be critical of the research we read. Chocolate, wine, caffeine, gender dysphoria, and autism are notorious subjects that require more scrutiny before reading.

So, caffeine addiction. This is a subject that more than one field is interested in. Before you read an article, you need to be sure what question you are asking. Psychologists are concerned with a more scientific or factual approach. In this context, a psychologist would be researching the concrete effects of caffeine on mood, sleep, and other psychological disorders. Sociologists are more concerned with the overall social consequences of caffeine addiction. They would be asking how mood and sleep affected family, work, and personal welfare. For your question, we're going to look into the psychological aspect. Also, I'm studying psychology, not sociology, so I would feel like an idiot answering those types of questions.

This distinction matters. When I opened my school's EBSCOHost database, I simply typed in "caffeine addiction" to start. I was bombarded with sociological articles and journals about the affects of caffeine addiction on productivity at work and on mood. Strange overlap with psychology. Two problems: some of the top articles had researchers with ties to coffee companies, and all "caffeine addicts" were self-reported. For the latter, this meant that there was no standard for how much caffeine was consumed. Rather than being a concrete article about caffeine consumption, it was more of a survey of public opinion. You want to avoid those unless you specifically want to know about the public opinion. Even psychologists run surveys all the time (they're cheap and easy), but people often lie on surveys, even if they're anonymous.

So I typed in more specific key words and came up with these articles. I'll talk about some without leaving a link, but that's because I had to request the PDFs for sharing. I'll come back to this post and link them. (Let me know if the ones I do link are broken.)

Okay, so I'm going to start off with a journal that interested me, personally. This study actually observed the effects of caffeine on psychiatric patients. This is an important reminder that different drugs influence different brains. Someone with ADHD experiences caffeine differently for a neurotypical person. Caffeine is a stimulant, and ADHD medications are stimulants. Cool. What about other disorders?

Here's the Sparknotes of the study, "Caffeine intoxication was more prevalent in psychiatric patients than in healthy subjects. The amount of caffeine intake was shown to be associated positively with the severity of pathology and inversely with sleep quality."

The study goes more into depth about the different psychological disorders that different patients had. There were 401 patients participating in this study (150 healthy individuals). Overall, continuous caffeine intake showed a decline in sleep quality and a general increase in severity of other mental illnesses.

So what causes that? What is caffeine? Here's an article that looks into studies about caffeine consumption and performance, as well as what the causes of an addiction could be and what constitutes an addiction. This is one I recommend giving a read, as it helps to illuminate a common problem with researching intoxicants.

Here's the big take away: "Although caffeine is widely perceived to have beneficial psychostimulant effects, appropriately controlled studies show that its apparent beneficial effects on performance and mood are almost wholly attributed to reversal of the withdrawal effects that occur after fairly short periods of abstinence (e.g. overnight)."

In habitual coffee users, the increase of mood and performance after consumption of caffeine is caused by the removal of withdrawal symptoms. Grouchy mood and lack of coordination are symptoms of caffeine withdrawal. Where one may perceive positive reinforcement for initial consumption, for habitual consumers, withdrawal symptoms become a negative reinforcement.

So, for people that drink coffee everyday, it's less about getting the positive effects of caffeine, but rather avoiding the negative effects of withdrawal. This can be classified as an addiction. There is now a reliance on this substance.

Something this article also points out is that caffeine is not just found in coffee. It's found in chocolate and most medications these days as well. Therefore, complete stone cold abstinence from caffeine can be next to impossible, making control groups difficult to find. This leads to the varying research and controversy between psychologists.

Okay, but coffee can't be as bad as alcohol or anything right? Caffeine is practically harmless! Let's take a look into an article discussing the health impacts of caffeine. (I'll provide the full text to this one tomorrow.)

In Dr. Saimaiti's article titled, "Dietary Sources, Health Benefits, and Risks of Caffeine," she explores the benefits of occasional consumption of caffeine and weighs them against habitual overconsumption of caffeine.

While occasional consumption can actually improve mood and cognitive ability, these benefits are lost with daily consumption.

Few people drink their coffee black. For those that put creamer, milk (especially oat), or straight sugar or syrups in their coffees daily, they may be overconsuming sugar. This is especially hard on an empty stomach. This is part of the reason you "crash" later in the day. The sugar raises your blood sugar. For most healthy people, this may not be the biggest deal in the world. For others, it could be a key factor in developing diabetes later in life. In general, don't drink coffee on an empty stomach. Have it with a meal. It's also easier on your liver.

Speaking of liver, what does your body do with the caffeine after you drink it? Caffeine follows the same principle as alcohol. Occasional consumption of red wine can help thin your blood and lower your hemoglobin (something that women may be more concerned about as they get older). However, daily consumption of wine can cause stress on the liver and potentially lead to dementia later in life (I say potentially because there has been a correlation, but no solid research as to why. While correlation does not always mean causation, it's important to acknowledge them in the meantime.)

Caffeine behaves in the same way. Continuous consumption of caffeine can put some real stress on your liver over time.

Caffeine is dangerous for those with cardiovascular problems. While this seems like a "duh!" point, many people don't know that they may be prone to cardiovascular issues until an event happens. This sounds like fear mongering, but it's something to take into account.

The article discusses pregnant women as well, but I would hope that's intuitive? Maybe not? If you're pregnant you should avoid intoxication in all forms.

I'll drop this quote from the conclusion of the article for now (I felt weird quoting text that you can't access yet, so I'll come back with more quotes when I can give you the PDF): "the long-term or over-consumption of caffeine can lead to addiction, insomnia, migraine, and other side effects."

The point is, caffeine consumption can be more dangerous to some than others in general, but excessive consumption with lack of knowledge can lead to long-term damage to one's health.

Okay, that study talks about a relatively small niche. Let's get broad. Let's talk about sleep and cognitive performance. (Another study I'll have the PDF for tomorrow.)

In Dr. Gottselig's article titled, "Random Number Generation During Sleep Deprivation: Effects of Caffeine on Response Maintenance and Stereotypy," she looks at the effects caffeine has on cognitive performance during sleep deprivation.

The conclusions of this research makes a very important point: "caffeine preserves simple aspects of cognitive performance during sleep deprivation, whereas caffeine may not prevent detrimental effects of sleep deprivation on some complex cognitive functions."

This article particularly found that while small cognitive functions such as motor ability improved with caffeine, complex cognitive functions such as problem solving and memory declined.

While a college student could read this and understand that pulling an all nighter and drinking 10 Red Bulls probably won't help them pass their test, there's something much more to be said about these findings.

One sleep deprived night won't kill you, and certainly drinking a cup of coffee to get you through the day won't either. But caffeine cannot prevent the damage that regular sleep deprivation does. Sleep deprivation leads to memory loss, worsening symptoms of depression/anxiety/ADHD, increased chances of developing dementia early (this one is real), and a decline in overall cognitive ability.

Rough. But it is a trap. If you have insomnia, caffeine may feel like your only choice to be somewhat functioning throughout the day. Caffeine promotes symptoms of insomnia. It's a vicious cycle if you can't afford proper treatment, and one, that I hope, that will be addressed with time.

So if you have the ability, it's better to prioritize a good night's sleep. I'll come back to this.

For now, why is caffeine addiction so controversial then? Well, it may not be for long. While there was a push to add "caffeine" to the list of diagnosable addiction in the DSM since the 1980's, the inconsistent and inconclusive research has led to a standstill. As we say with Dr. Jame's article, it is difficult to get a control group for caffeine. However, as research for alcohol and marijuana progresses, our knowledge of how to properly study intoxicants does as well.

The long-term health side effects of caffeine are still being studied as well. While this aspect isn't unique to caffeine at all (marijuana, for example, is just now getting approved for research, where before it was illegal), it's still worth acknowledging what we do know, for now at least.

So, coming back to the DSM. There's a new one coming out pretty soon. It's the talk of the town among psychologists right now. Everyone is arguing about what should be in the DSM-6. It'll be crazy when it does come out. Autism, OCD, Gender Dysphoria, Borderline Personality Disorder, and Facial Dysmorphia are just a few examples of disorders that will likely be completely recategorized.

(Unrelated, but Autism Spectrum Disorder is a big one because a lot of psychologists are arguing that it shouldn't be classified as a disorder at all. The reason being is that Autism is so common, that psychologists are theorizing that the majority of the population falls on the spectrum somewhere. Either way, the diagnosis is about to completely change because of this fact.) (Well, all of them are big ones. I could make a whole separate post about it.)

Anyway, the push to make caffeine diagnosable is becoming a promising endeavor as research continues to come out.

One psychiatrist pushing for this is Ronald Griffiths. In his opinion piece, Griffiths recalls his patients experiencing caffeine withdrawal symptoms that led to a decline in the quality of life. One of his patients was diagnosed with breast cancer and needed to stop drinking coffee immediately. This patient struggled with severe withdrawal symptoms that were difficult to manage while on cancer treatment.

Griffiths explains how difficult it was to treat this patient because it wasn't something he could easily diagnose with the DSM-5, something insurance companies use to decide whether they're going to pay for care or not. Add on the bills for cancer treatment, and you rapidly have a distressing situation on your hands.

Joseph DeRupo, spokesman for the National Coffee Association in the U.S. as quoted in this article states, "What we have here is really the opinion of one scientist who is a lone voice against the accepted view of the scientific community."

Lone voice? In barely an hour I was able to find 5 credible articles, all backed by credible researchers, supporting the understanding that American society consumes too much caffeine. You can take a General Psych class in college and the textbook would spend half a chapter going over caffeine addiction and the controversial research around it. Coffee companies piss me off. And most companies use slave labor to harvest their beans and lobby to prevent legislation to prevent it. Guillotine.

Griffiths also claims that "[e]ven people who consume as little as 100 milligrams of caffeine a day—the equivalent of one small cup of coffee—can become physically dependent."

So this ask is pretty old, but I'm guessing it was in response to me saying that you should only drink one cup of a random beverage a day and the rest be water. This keeps you hydrated and helps cut out where the majority of your sugar intake is. I called it the "desert beverage" and that "coffee counts."

It really does. In the morning, one feels tired, foggy, and grouchy. "Don't talk to me until I've had my morning coffee." They would make their coffee out of habit, barely minding the taste of it—drinking to medicate the headache they've already caused.

Life is worth celebrating, and if we can find little things in our day to celebrate, we should! When coffee becomes a habit, it's just a habit. That's sad.

I worked as a barista for a while at a coffee shop that hired people with intellectual disabilities. That experience is what made me switch my major to psychology in the first place. But I saw the joys coffee could bring, and the damage it can do, too. I had a coworker who would come in and throw a tantrum if we didn't immediately stop what we were doing and make him a coffee—and again in two hours before the end of his shift. It's upsetting.

I do remember the joys, too. Our manager would show us a new niche coffee drink from a random country. We would make cubanos like they would in Haiti and talk about the different names they had in different countries around the world. It ruled.

I don't drink coffee every day anymore. But it's always a wonderful thing when I do. You don't need to have an "excuse" to drink a cup of coffee—you don't need to celebrate anything at all. Coffee, tea, wine, soda, and juice should be celebrated as they are. Drinking them out of habit destroys joy. Intentional habits create stable foundations in life. Unintentional habits create monotony and boredom.

Anyway, the sleep thing I said I'd come back to. So if you're having trouble sleeping, here's the hot tip: avoid screens 30 minutes before going to bed. That sounds easy, but how many of us scroll our phones, watch TV, or play a video game right before bed? It's not worth it.

Instead, do something away from your phone that you enjoy. I like to read, but you can draw, journal, listen to some music, practice an instrument, or write something. Doesn't matter, just don't use your phone or laptop. Set a 30 minute timer for time.

If you're still struggling to sleep, you may find meditation useful. Meditation uses techniques that make your brain send beta waves which relaxes you and is the first step to falling asleep. But! If you try to learn some meditation, you'll have to commit to practicing it every night for it to be useful. It's a skill that requires practice.

Anyway, I could make a whole separate post about evening/morning/afternoon routines as that is another one of my passions, but yeah.

TLDR; An occasional cup of coffee is actually great and wonderful, but you really shouldn't drink it every day, especially more than once a day.

PS. I love Red Bull cream sodas more than the God that created them, I swear, but I only drink maybe one or two energy drinks a year. Energy drinks will dissolve your liver faster than hydrochloric acid can. An alcoholic drinking 5 packs of beers a day will look at your liver and be impressed. Also the Panera lemonade should be illegal. That shit is CRAZY. That bitch had more caffeine than a Bang energy drink. It literally killed a man. Wild.

#anon im gonna be so incredibly transparent #before you read this #i spent four and a half hours researching and putting this together #and i still gotta add more sources tomorrow after my school send the pdfs to me #so i didnt proof read it #im tired #i hope it makes enough sense #also sorry if it sounds like i mansplained in the beginning and end #i dont know who you are or what your background is #so i tried to cover my corners as much as i could #anyway #i got a little buddhist philosophy at the end there to #as a treat for me #i hope it doesnt sound preachy #i need a nap bro #sorry for taking so long to get to your ask #i never saw it until now #BUT #i hope it worked as a good starting point if you wanted to look into more #let me know if the links are fucked and ill try to fix them #asks of dante #thoughts of dante #ill tag your little emoji bc i figured that was purposeful #🪴

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cathalbravecog · 11 months

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Man... I can't stop thinking about the things that were talked about on the stream, especially the answer on my question - so... get ready for a ramble! its a long one. oops. i dont even know where im going with this, im just dumping my thoughts somewhere. half is about ttcc lore in general and the streams, the other half is about cathal and me projecting onto him deeper.

before i even hop deeper into this, it wasn't until early today that i learned that there was a whole drama about cranky's answers (regarding the graham and flint question and the whole "keep it sane" thing. i thought it was...off, but i understood it as 'do what you want people, just don't start any harassment because of ships and your favorite pairs'.

definitely could have been phrased better, though. at least we got a good response and an apology later from maven on twitter. but i legit did not know this was a drama until those twitter posts were made LOL. i dont interact with the fandom so i do not know how that answer was percieved by most. or if anyone except for me and my friends have had any thoughts about the question i asked that got answered.)

and what im tryna get to is that i get cranky isnt the one to be answering lore things, and probably didnt know what to answer... but it's still something to think about

because being told "cogs and toons just dont become how they are out of the blue" (paraphrasing here) as an answer to what cathal initially thought of seeing his dad be bet up and thrown off a tower is... confusing? he did say first and foremost that it has to be built upon before saying that. i understand that this is... a lot of characters! and cathal did have some focus on him thanks to the comic and they wanted to focus on other managers... but some have deeper, more intricate lore that's easy to grasp (especially the more, well, angstier managers like chip and misty.)

and we have gotten some extra lore for other managers like belle, mary, tawny.... thanks to thomas' rambles.

and it's definitely difficult for a team of volounteers working hard on a fan game together to make lore for all the characters, that are still very young in their *life span*, having been around for less than a year. despite ttcc being more character driven and focused on the cogs, it's still a game they have to run so they cannot focus on lore only and some game management has to be done first. there's a bunch of things they have to consider, like consistency and how fans may react, or possible themes or what they want the story to be...

and. yeah. its hard since. come on lets admit it. clash has an issue with how these are all given to us. hell, there's lore bits i still dont know about and im still learning because it's..so all over the place. a new player will not know about it. maven acknowledged this in the tweet and i really appreciate that, as it's honestly been my number one issue with clash, especially as someone who is there for the lore. (i mean, and the gameplay, i know some people who don't play the game itself much. well i sure do a little TOO MUCH because i have PROBLEMS. but im interested in the lore, too, yknow?)

some lore you cant learn from the wiki, and unless you interact with the community, you may never learn *where* all of this even is. if you werent live for certain lore there, it's hardly accessible to you. lore locked behind one time events, an arg website, wikis, discord chats... all that. it's hard to keep track of! i'm sure it's like that for both the fans and the writers. these characters are great, fun, and i love them, but the way we are given this information is... not the best. it's very easy to miss certain details.

it's especially bad if you're like me - only ever interacting with a close group of people you trust, (because people are scary especially a lot of... lore driven fans. yeahnoimeanshippers.sorry.and just big crowds of people in general) having only gotten back into the game recently AFTER most of the major lore events (first played once in 2019, then never again until january 2023) and also you dislike youtube and video content, so you dont watch it. something in your brain would rather if you step on a nail than watch a playthrough video (especially with commentary).

like in general it shouldnt be necessary to go through all these hoops just to know the lore! especially for things that may have little lore...

anyways, uh, back to cathal. i cannot stop thinking about this.

it definitely wasnt an answer to what i specifically asked - but possibly more so about... why cathal is the way he is? and despite what my brain and low self esteem during hard times may tell me - i do not believe that anybody is truly "lazy". i just dont think that exists. there's always some reason behind a person being unmotivated or lazy. even the little things!

but like... that's just kinda obvious. all toons and cogs have motivations. thats like... one of the basics of writing characters. have motivations for characters and reasons for why they are how they are. doesnt have to be anything tragic, just.... how they are as people.

it's totally unrelated to the question of what cathal thought about seeing his dad like that... but oh well! i asked that because i made up my own story around that already, and i just wanted to see what someone working on the game thinks about the same idea.

not to be Tumblr User CathalBravecog, but, of course I have projected heavily onto cathal. i have already stated how important cathal is to me as a character, especially with appreciating myself when im.. not exactly the most motivated. when im not doing much. taught me to appreciate breaks. hell! i keep preaching this myself. its okay to take breaks! and yet i often end up not doing it and i overwork myself on games and art and other things.

there's... a lot of things "wrong" with me that i don't have names for yet, especially due to not having a diagnosis for them, but they're very real feelings and they cause me to be unable to do things a lot of the time. various mental blocks and a new member of the gang... physical pai! hooray.

this... endless productivity we are forced and expected to do. it can take a toll on you. breaks are just as necessary and to say it's a thing that has to be re-learned is... sickening. hooray for living in a Corporate (clash) society, fellas.

one thing i can say is that i absolutely headcanon that cathal has adhd - though, maybe not the same type i do. i do not think he gets randomly hyper and wants to (and does) jump around everywhere and blurt things out randomly and impulsively. cathal here has the low energy, yknow.

i like that a lot of the content around him doesnt even describe him with the words "lazy" and "sleepy" instead.

every day is the same... even if his job is relatively simple, just watching over the camera feed - it's definitely boring... and having to do it every day is not rewarding. and being mostly alone and without consequence, he gives into wanting to do something else. he's got these huge screens and a room to himself, and he loves watching shows and cartoons... so he's gonna do that. it's more fun. it's stimulating. and especially with his dad being the one to give him his position, he knows that he's got nothing to really worry about there.

i also think it's a bit hard to be motivated knowing that... this war between the cogs and toons is just. endless. hell, again, he has to see his dad *everyday* be attacked by them. his body damaged after the fall - only to be fixed again. rinse and repeat. i would too, find it pointless. especially if you're like cathal, since i pointed out before that he is very kind and caring towards the other cogs. he's also thoughtful, noting that yknow... a lot of stairs to get to his room.

why do all that when you can chill... and feel good. do something that feels nice...

i don't have any names for this, but with how sleepy he usually is, that's definitely a thing to consider too. and just, from experience... being tired and/or sleepy it... dismotivates you even more. its so hard to start tasks even if you *want* to do them. and considering cathal mooost likely doesn't want to do his work on his own - then these tasks can be just. impossible to start.

like, i have struggled with this my entire life myself, just because of my adhd screwing with everything, but after getting covid and most definitely getting a form of chronic exhaustion from it.. things have been even harder. i pull myself through day and i barely have the energy to even start anything. sometimes i dont even do anything all day and... woops! still no mood or energy to do anything. i just work on random bursts of motivation and things that captivate me...

not sure how it relates to cathal, but, hey, if im personal here ill ramble about it too because WOW it has been biting me in the ass and i need to speak to Professionals About It

like... i dont think hes being "lazy" willingly, yknow? theres a reason behind it. it definitely is just... being sleepy, the comfort... the fun and stimulation doing something fun he's interested in (his shows) are just... stronger desires and way easier for him to get to. why struggle through something when it takes up all your energy, and then you feel no reward for it? yeah. exactly. even just "not feeling like it" is a reson. "not having energy" is a reason. hey, are these things to get better about if needed? certainly. i wish i could get help with this, it would help me in my life so so much. but should it be seen as ENTIRELY negative and as being a "hinder to society". hell nah. and i think thats swag. cathal is swag he can do this, good for him lmaooo. my brain is deteriorating i apologize.

there was... another thing i wanted to say, but i forgot. so i'll move on.

but just... yeah. i dont think cathal is just lazy. i dont believe in "laziness". he's got reasons for why he prefers naps and just... watching tv instead of doing his work. perhaps he does want to do these things, but gave up on trying. its not worth the effort, it does not feel good. its not stimulating enough to keep him going.

#long #ramble #cathalposting #i...may delete this later i dont know. i both wanna talk to ppl i know about this #but also Do Not Percieve me. I am Afraid Of What People Think #Stay Back Foul Beasts !#alsoy eah i had other stuff to talk about...more on the negative side i guess but??? its. a bit difficult to #give and .. angstier things? negative thoughts? to a character who you see a lot of comfort in. they make you happy #they help you feel better about yourself. you want to see them happy. if theyre happy #youre happy. if theyre sad...well. you are sad. sadness is natural. its a real thing. it happens sometimes. its a part of life #and i have attached some of these things to cathal already. but a few things are hard for me to consider because of The Brain Worms.#i dont want to see him hurt either yknow.#anyways i hope you enjoyer my mental illness ramble. im not normal and you shouldve known that when you followed me #thank you for existing cathal ray toby braveswag #hey fun fact remember how i said i get tired of stuff myself easily well this whole thing made me tired. i was gonna #answer an ask but now im like. man. (melts into a puddle)#(doesnt take a break bc i need instant stimulation and makes things worse for myself)#do yall see why i like cathal so much now gamers?#ya. sorry this got personal. if any of you can handle reading this u deserve a reward.#and maybe i need to start talking about personal things this much. but whatever #this is my blog i can talk about anything and thats the COOL THING!#MWAHAHAHHAHAHA!#dies #ivegot a lot going on in my brain rn cant u tell

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thecherrygod · 1 year

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Robot hdb and mechanic/technician kim pt 2, more serious this time

@morphlingunderscore thank you for taking interest in this!!! originally i didn't have too many thoughts about it but.... Something shifted, and last night i couldn't stop thinking about it, sorry if it got a bit too long kdkdkgks i got more invested than i thought i would

Maybe he was made by Dora? As part of a prototype series of robots, i think hdb could be harrys model And maybe she even named harry just. Harry. Bc there was something about him, about how programming, that was faulty but made him special (the skills. They make him too human while not human enough) (also maybe part of his program knows he had a name but it got wiped too, and he is fixated on it, on having lost that. .... It could be kept as part of a letter in a compartment somewhere in his robotic body... Maybe even in his chest cavity... Maybe Kim finds it when having to fix something in there........ No concrete thoughts there, just a vague idea that I'm keeping here.)

At first this would be very interesting, getting herself attached to him (and i feel like it's also the thing that makes Kim so invested in him later down the line)

But. Things keep breaking, he has blackouts (maybe caused by overheating? Maybe the skills cause the overheating and/or short-circuiting?), He keeps messing up his tasks, and his system may not be fully capable of following the classic three laws of robotics all the way through. It gets exhausting, she has better projects to work on, others that can stop being prototypes, more worthy of time and resources, that will get recognition, and get her out of the place they're living in.

And so she leaves, and leaves her old lab and obsolete projects to gather dust never to be used again.

Kim, on the other hand, really just is a mechanic for the most part, but he can really work with any machine, and would know about programming and circuits and everything, having learned about this on his free time.

This interest starts properly after having moved from foster families a few times, and managing to get a mechanic to take him and teach him how it all works, getting his hands on an actual engine,tho hes always been interested even as a child, from what he could find in books.

He has his own garage now, and works on any machine you bring him, from cars to a microwave, anything that helps him pay the bills and allows him to work with things he enjoys. Also doing these kind of household appliance fixes makes him go out in search for any parts that he may need for his job, whatever's cheaper (por straight up free, of you know where to go)

I think that, like in canon, it's thanks to Kim that harry wakes up again. In this case maybe hes looking around for something and manages to shock harry in a way that his body starts right there and then? Idk too much about this kinda stuff and it's late. It could also be noise with enough vibration to make Harry's gears shift again. But as i said idk about machines I'm general nor if that makes sense/is possible)

The rest is basically this: harry helps Kim find parts, either that they can use on him or on other machines. He malfunctions more now bc both of the prevailing issues, the wipe out, and the passing of time, and Kim is willing to fix the parts he can, and understand the ones that seem to make no sense, and this, all this, new, can bring a change to Kim's monotonous life, spark something in him, also be confronted about some of his being stagnant by harry. Also the wipeout isn't a complete thing, this guy would realize Kim likes speedfreaks and would use himself as a radio to play it just to see him have a good time, for example. His skills still work with understanding humans (... Sometimes).

another way of doing this tho would be hay being made for the rcm (still Dora's creation imo). Faulty but good for all the same reasons + this robot will give you a ridiculous list of theories/keep track of evidence/of witnesses) alibis/the things that have no relation to the case you don't want him to remember but still does.

In this case one of his faults could also be in fact his memory, and it being faulty enough it had an almost full cleaning could be from people trying to delete info from it and failing. Or him doing it himself so he feels like he still has a reason for not being discarded by the rcm. And kim could still be part of the rcm but both as a mechanic and a detective, or just mechanic, or just detective on paper but with the knowledge

#my posts #disco elysium #harrykim #should get a name for the au so i can find it on my blog sldkcldkg #also!!! thank you for your interest!! and for thinking im funny lmao glad to know #... i am weak to speaking about harry and dora honestly it just captivatea me it feels important to add when i can kekvlehlw #also uhm. at the time of typing all this i didnt really see what i wrote in my own tags IFDKKSGKW something overtook me as i wrote this #so.. i hope this is kind of ehat you asked for!!!!#its the next day i added the rcm thing lmao #hdb #kim kitsuragi #dora ingerlund #also added more tags fkdkgks and the readmore bc it got a bit long oops i lovr them your honor #finally managed to proofread it also kdkgkw its 5 pm i wrote that at midnight sorry it took a while im still on a bus kgksvls #ok im poating it yet again thank you for your interest on this!!! i just think it can have a good potential #.... yeah!#... i still dont know if i proofread it properly lmao if something foesnt makes sense or anything please tell me #... or your ideas on this id love to ses other people's takes on it if anyone wants to kekgkehk #anyways!!!#you know what im editing out the readmore. look at my posts #robot hdb au #i think im gonna call it that #simple lmao #to find it in my blog later mostly

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