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whumpshaped · 6 months

Note

sunshine for the bingo? :]

BINGO. also technically this is the second time but the first was so tiny it doesnt count. after this

masterlist bingo card

tw vampire whumper, vampire whumpee, accidental whump, burns, past trauma, lady whumper, flashbacks, conditioned whumpee, death talk and corpses

Helle knew they would have to let go of Beck and begin cleaning up at some point. The entire place was wrecked, and it hurt their heart to know they'd just managed to do a bit of tidying up a week or so prior. Wasted effort.

They glanced towards the bodies and the blood seeping into the carpet, and they just knew all of it was soaked, both the fabric and the wood below. Was it ruined now? Were they going to have to call someone to redo the entire floor? Surely not. Surely, it could be salvaged...

They groaned in frustration. Okay. They just had to start.

"Will you actually stay in my bedroom this time if I bring you back?" they asked gently, already scooping Beck up before he could've answered.

"I'm sorry for leaving," he muttered. "I got so... so worried."

"Yes, yes, because I am wholly incapable of defending myself. What would I do without the help of a runt?" They pushed the door open and carried him inside, then took a calming breath. "Never do it again, yes? I will not praise you for disobeying me, if that is what you were hoping for."

Beck looked up at them with teary eyes. "I don't– I don't want praise, I was just... I was hoping maybe you'd... you'd forgive me for it, if I ended up being useful..."

"I do forgive you. But I need you to promise you will never do such a thing again."

He slowly nodded, his expression full of guilt and the pain of rejection. He must've felt so heroic in that moment when the stake had hit him, knowing he'd likely saved their life, and now here they were, scolding him for it. But they didn't need to encourage something as stupid as heroism. Self-sacrifice. What good did that ever do? Beck was way too willing to get himself killed, and with his abilities, it'd become a reality sooner than later if they were to indulge him.

"I promise, Master. I'm sorry."

"Good." They walked over to their closet and picked out a shirt, then tore off a strip of fabric. Then another. Then one more. They didn't want to go and get the actual bandages until all the windows were covered up again, and they didn't want Beck completely soaking the bed until then either. This seemed like a reasonable compromise, and something that would hold him over until he healed. They had too many shirts anyway.

He looked more than grateful to be patched up by them, mumbling thank yous all the way through. "I can help with cleaning," he said eagerly. "Once– once it doesn't hurt as much–"

"I am counting on that. Your family made a mess of this place."

He winced. "I'm sorry. I'll... I'll come help as soon as I can, Master."

Annoying. So annoying. So many little glass shards to pick up. So many corpses to throw into a pile by the front door. So many layers of clothing to put on so they wouldn't get burned. They could've waited for nightfall, sure, but they didn't want to spend their night doing this.

Helle huffed as they tried to put another ripped off curtain rod back in place, securing it with regular nails and a hammer. They didn't own a fucking drill, they never thought they'd need it. And this was the easier part, too. Hanging up the curtains themselves was a major pain in the ass, and they were not looking forward to it.

They went window by window, holding at least three nails in their mouth at all times. They were so immersed in their work that they didn't even hear as the bedroom door opened and closed, nor the soft patter of feet drawing nearer and nearer.

"The bleeding stopped," Beck announced sheepishly, almost startling them enough to fall off the ladder; but instead they ended up letting go of the half-secured curtain to steady themself, letting in the last rays of the evening sun as it swung to the side.

Beck let out a bloodcurdling scream as the light hit his sensitive body, and Helle jumped off the ladder without thinking to pull him into the shadows. "What on earth is wrong with you?" they snapped, desperate to cover up their horror and nausea with righteous anger. "Your only job for the night was to stay away from goddamn trouble! Is that really so difficult?"

The poor thing was crying and whimpering from the pain, his hands, neck, and face burnt and twitchy. Helle was pretty sure he couldn't even see with his eyes having gotten such a direct hit — he was probably blind for the moment.

"I– I'm sorry– I'm sorry–"

"Oh, be quiet." They wanted to strangle him. They wanted to throw him against the wall and hear his ribs crack. They really wished their stupid, idiotic, overzealous, overexcited puppy of a vampire servant could've resisted the urge to throw himself in harm's way for just two seconds. "What did I tell you? What the hell did I tell you? I told you to stay in the goddamn bedroom."

Beck whined, so pitiful that Helle couldn't stand it. They shoved his burnt body further into the darker parts of the room, letting him stumble and fall when he failed to find a single thing to hold onto. Not that it would've helped, given how ruined his hands were. "I'm sorry," he repeated brokenly, staring at nothing with those stupid doe eyes of his. "I'm sorry, I'm s-sorry–"

"Quiet."

He flinched and curled in on himself, sobbing, making it impossible not to draw a comparison to when...

"I apologise!" they cried for the hundredth time, body covered in lashes and fresh burns. They couldn't stop trying every time the lady pulled them away from that terrifying, poisonous patch of sunshine in the hallway, whenever they got a moment of reprieve and they weren't just screaming incoherently. "Please, forgive me–"

She pushed them forward again, plunging most of their upper body into the light to sizzle and melt like wax.

Beck tried to weep as quietly as he could, afraid of being punished further than he'd already punished himself by accident. They shook their head a little, dispelling the memory.

"I shall draw you a cold bath after I have finished the work," they said coldly. "Do try to writhe as little as possible; burned skin cracks and tears quite easily."

@whumpprentice @starliight-whump

taglist: @whumpsday @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @florissimps @nicolepascaline @oliversrarebooks @the-cyrulik @pirefyrelight @there-will-always-be-blood @pigeonwhumps @echo-goes-mmm @whumpycries @morning-star-whump @d-cs @watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees @tauntedoctopuses @blueyellow8green @typewrittenfangs @whumpsoda @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @auroragehenna @whumpedydump

#at my beck and call #whump #whump writing #helle #beckett #vampire whumper #vampire whumpee #accidental whump #burns #past trauma #lady whumper #flashbacks #conditioned whumpee #death mention

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cosmicclearwater · 1 year

Text

Promise Me

Genre: slight fluff, angst (?) Character: Embry Call Word Count: 2k Warnings: cursing, mentions of blood, mentions of death/dying

Y/N's POV

Maybe wandering off into the woods right before a storm wasn't the brightest idea, but I wasn't exactly known for having those. In my defense, I didn't think it was going to start so soon. I guess I should have expected it, having lived in Forks all of my life, but we can't all be perfect.

About half an hour into my hike, it began pouring. The trees could only do so much to block the heavy downpour. With the soil beneath my boots having quickly turned to mud, and mixed with the foliage, my trek through the forest was becoming much harder. I was seriously regretting having left the comfort of my home. Not just because of the storm, but also because I'm now remembering the warning my best friend and boyfriend, Embry, had clearly given me hours ago.

"I know you love your daily hikes but things are beginning to get a lot more dangerous around here. No more venturing out alone. Promise me you won't."

"Okay." I replied with a tight-lipped smile.

If we are being technical, I didn't necessarily promise him not to. I was just simply agreeing, therefore I'm not breaking anything. Despite that, his words were the only thing running through my mind as I stomped through the thick forest, continuing my journey to the reservation. I would say that I was about 15 minutes away from my destination when I tripped over a tree root hidden in the messy ground below me.

An immense amount of pain began shooting up my left leg, starting at my ankle. It was definitely sprained, if not fractured. I had also managed to scratch up both of my knees and the palms of my hands. The wet denim fabric of my jeans made it difficult to check the wounds on my knees, but I could tell they were probably pretty nasty considering the amount of blood that was quickly beginning to soak through my pants, adding to the inconvenience of the whole situation.

After about 10 or so minutes of looking myself over and trying to conjure up a plan of how I'm going to make it the rest of the way without injuring myself further, I got up and began to hobble my way down the path again. I hadn't made it very far when something rushed past me in a flash, causing me to stumble backwards and fall right on my ass. I looked around and saw nothing, however, that didn't ease the tightness that I felt in my throat. If I had been anyone else, I would have shook it off and kept going, but living in the world that I have come to know, I knew that that only meant one very terrible thing.

'Vampire.' I thought as I finally spotted her standing about 200 feet in front of me.

My first instinct was to get up and run, but I knew it wouldn't have been possible, even without a messed up ankle. I was royally fucked in this situation.

• ───────────────── •

Embry's POV

I had been out patrolling like normal with Quil, Jared, and Collin when we came across a lone vampire wandering around our territory. A newborn. Collin left to go inform Sam and the others while Quil, Jared, and I began our chase. It wasn't long before the others had joined us in the hunt. It took a little while but we had finally gotten close to catching it. We almost had her. Almost being the key word. I'm not sure what her original destination had been but something had caught her attention and she began to change course. We had been chasing her West but she suddenly began running South in a frenzy-like manner.

"Do you smell that?" Brady, one of our newer and younger pack members, questioned. "I'm picking up someone's scent. It smells familiar but I can't figure out who it belongs to. The rain is making it harder to pick up on it."

Everyone in the pack began lifting their snouts in the air. It took one sniff to pick up the scent, and when I did, fear instantly sank into every fiber of my being.

"Y/N!" I quickly began running in the direction her scent was coming from. The very same direction the leech had just previously gone in. Panic coursed through my veins but I tried my best to stay level-headed. I had to if I wanted to save her.

I could faintly hear the rest of the pack following after me. We rushed through the forest as quickly as we could. At the speed that I was running at, I didn't think it was possible to go any faster, but I proved myself wrong when Y/N's scream sounded through the forest.

• ───────────────── •

Y/N's POV

I began taking in my surroundings, trying to think of something to help me at least gain some kind of advantage. It was absolutely pointless though, because in the blink of an eye, she was suddenly standing right before me. Her feet mere inches from mine.

"Hello." she greeted, voice sounding innocent despite the condescending grin she had on her lips. "You seem to have hurt yourself a little. What happened?"

"I-I" I stuttered before taking a deep breath in attempt to mask my fear. "I tripped. Wasn't paying enough attention and failed to notice a tree root sticking out of the ground."

"What a shame." she snickered, crouching down to my level. "You should be more careful. It would be awful if something worse had happened, don't you think?"

"You're absolutely right." I responded, forcing out a laugh, hoping it didn't sound as nervous as I felt. "I should really get going. Need to clean my wounds before they get infected or something."

Placing my hands on either side of me, I began to push myself up. I was abruptly stopped when I felt white hot pain coming from my injured ankle.

"Not so fast." The grip she now had on me tightening. "That's not a good idea. Not with the state of your ankle."

"P-please let go." I breathed out heavily.

"Or what?" she smirked, gripping so hard that I swear I heard my ankle crack as clearly as I felt it.

A loud, pain-filled scream ripped through my lungs. The pain now so intense that I thought I was going to faint. Tears blurred my vision as I tried to pull away from her. When she finally let go, relief washed through my body but it didn't last longer than a second. Her hand that was once wrapped around my ankle was now around my throat, lifting me off the ground and completely cutting off all the oxygen to my lungs.

"I wish it didn't have to be this way." she feigned guilt, before replacing the frown on her face with an evil grin. "But I must admit that it's a lot more fun."

The last thing I remember as I closed my eyes was the evil look in her's and her bared fangs. I waited for the feeling of her teeth piercing my skin, but it never came. Instead, I was flung to the ground, my head hitting hard as I fell.

As my lungs began to fill with oxygen again, I slowly became more aware of my surroundings. I could here growling and the sound of heavy paws hitting the ground. Turning my head as much as I could, I saw several large wolves tearing the vampire into pieces with their massive jaws. The pack had made it just in time and saved the day once again. A small smile made its way onto my face and I could faintly feel tears of relief sliding down my cheeks as the world finally went dark around me.

• ───────────────── •

I'm not sure how long I was out but it must have been a while because I definitely wasn't in the forest anymore. The sound of beeping machines and the warmth of whatever room I was in made it very apparent. Opening my eyes, I was met with bright white lights. Once I had adjusted to them, I realized I was at the hospital. I began to try to sit myself up in the bed when two warm hands stopped me.

"Careful!" the familiar voice of my boyfriend exclaimed. "Let me help you."

"Hey, Em." Was all I managed to whisper hoarsely when I was finally situated in a sitting position and could clearly see the man in front of me.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"Like I've been hit by a bus. Or seven." I chuckled weakly.

"I bet. You definitely look like you could have been."

I could tell he was trying to keep things light-hearted but there was no humor found in his words. I could feel the guilt creeping in. I was regretting not having listened to him. For going against his words when all he was trying to do was protect me. Seeing the sadness in his eyes as he trailed them over my injuries made me wish I would've stayed in the comfort of my home with a good book and a hot cup of tea.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, biting my lip to hopefully hold back the sob threatening to rise from my throat.

"No, I'm sorry." He sighed. "If I had gotten there sooner, we wouldn't be here right now."

"You don't have any reason to be apologizing. You saved my life. Had you and the pack showed up any later, or not at all, I wouldn't be alive." I argued. "I was the one that ignored your warning and wandered off into the forest alone. I caused you and the guys trouble because I couldn't stay put like you had asked me to. I would hate me if I were you."

"I could never hate you." He smiled reassuringly, his warm hand finding mine. "Yeah, you're extremely stubborn and you drive me absolutely insane sometimes, but I still love you all the same. As sad and angry as I am with the way things happened today, I'm just glad that you're alive."

"All thanks to you and the guys." I smiled at him, lifting his hand to place a soft peck on the back of it. "Speaking of which. Where are they? I would like to pass on my gratitude and appreciation to them myself."

"We're right here." Jared spoke, walking through the door as if he had been given a cue.

"Happy to see you still breathing, Dumbass." Paul greeted as he pushed his way past Jared and into the room, followed by Sam, Quil, and Emily.

"We all are." Emily smiled.

"But on a more serious note." Sam interjected. "You're lucky we made it when we did. The worst you got was a broken ankle but it could've been a completely different story had we been even a minute too late."

"I know." I nodded. "And I will forever be thankful. Honestly. Thank you for saving me back there. All of you."

"Any time." Quil responded, half joking and half not.

"When can I get out of here?"

"We are just waiting for the CT scan results." Embry answered. "Sue's working tonight and requested to be your nurse. She says that if everything looks good, you can be discharged within the hour."

Everyone stayed and chatted until Sue showed up 15 minutes later. The results came back clear and after giving me aftercare instructions for all of my wounds and injuries, she sent me and Embry on our way.

• ───────────────── •

"Don't ever scare me like that again?" Embry whispered as we laid in bed together later that night, faces only centimeters apart. "Promise me."

Ever since we had arrived home, he hadn't been able to keep his eyes, or hands, off of me. Almost as if he was scared that I would just suddenly disappear.

"I won't. I promise." I leaned forward and pecked the corner of his mouth softly.

"I thought I was going to lose you today." His voice shaking slightly as if he was trying to hold back his tears. "I-I don't know what I would have done if I-"

"Don't. Don't think about the what if's and the could have's, because all it's gonna do is drive you crazy. All that matters is that we are here, together, right now."

Leaning back in, Embry's lips locked with mine. The kiss was sweet but intense and full of so much emotion. As if he was pouring every ounce of love, sadness, relief, fear, etc. into it. When we finally separated, we were both breathing heavily. With his forehead resting on mine, our noses brushing softly, he smiled at me.

"I love you." He spoke quietly, lips ghosting mine as he did.

"And I love you."

#twilight wolf pack #twilight wolf pack imagine #embry call #embry call imagine

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sirendeepity · 1 year

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Books I've read in 2022

I'm starting this on 24/09 because I know the time this is going to take me will be too much, so (present-me note: it didn't take me too much, just an hour or so, I was just feeling lazy)

77/ 22 (updated to: /52)

The Foxhole Court ★★★★.5

The Raven King ★★★★.5

The King's Men ★★★★.5 (there's not a single right thing in here but yes?? Read this shit??)

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue ★★★★ (not as life-altering as they said it would be but oh, Luc)

The Inheritance Games ★★★★ (the vibes were there but everything else was not? TikTok what are you doing?? At least it was fun tho)

The Hawthorne Legacy ★★★.5

Caraval ★★★★

Legendary ★★★★★ (Tella <333 Dante <333 Jacks <333)

Finale ★★★★★

House of Sky and Breath ★★★ (where do I begin: loved Bryce, but now not anymore, loved the story, now it's giving me the ick, Hunt was neutral, now I lowkey hate him, Tharion wtf is wrong with you, but the Rhun, Flynn, Dec trio with Ithan and the new (female) addictions? Immaculate. Ariadne is queen aND I WANT HER WITH FLYNN THEY ARE SERVINGGGG)

The Love Hypothesis ★★★★ (I read that this year? Mh)

From Lukov With Love ★★★

Shatter Me ★★★ (half a let-down, half a mind trip, but Kenji <333)

Destroy Me ★★★★★

Unravel Me ★★★.5

Fracture Me ★★★.5

Ignite Me ★★★★

Restore Me ★★★.5

Shadow Me ★★★★

Defy Me ★★★★

Reveal Me ★★★★

Imagine Me ★★★★

Believe Me ★★★ (I kept asking myself why Aaron was still a bitch until I realized that's how morally gray characters are supposed to be and not the watered-down version aka "I'm a bad guy until you learn about my trauma and how misunderstood I am, and magically I'm the perfect saint character to ever exist" and, yeah)

Flock ★★★

Exodus ★★★★ (we love rainy days, don't we baby?)

The Finish Line ★★ (useless, I hated it, it shouldn't exist)

Corrupt ★★★.5

Hideaway ★★★★★ (Nikova mf Banks ladies and gentlemen)

Kill Switch ★★★★.5 (Damon is a psycho by day and a poet by night, also he and Andrew are the same person in different fonts)

Conclave ★★★

Nightfall ★★★★★ (WillEmmy SERVED but BanksEmmy had so much potential, which wouldn't have gone to waste if someone *looks at Penelope Douglas* got her head out of Erika Fane's ass.)

Fire Night ★★★★

Punk 57 ★★★★

Addicted to You ★★★ (my very first comment to this was mean, like mean-mean, so I'm censuring past me and saying: I don't hate LiLo anymore, they're still nowhere near the top but we like some good character development here)

Ricochet ★★★

Heartstopper 1 ★★★★★

Heartstopper 2 ★★★★★

Heartstopper 3 ★★★★★

Heartstopper 4 ★★★★

Only a Monster ★★★★ (I literally cannot remember what happened at the end of this? Like, I remember, but I don't? Anyway I loved it and AARON MY GOODNESS you're a little Malfoy and I love this for you. I'll definitely do a reread before the sequel comes out)

House of Salt and Sorrow ★★★.5

Shadow & Bone (reread) ★★★.5

The Risk (p.s. I refused to give a rating to this because some things should just not be rated and whatever tf this series was is one of those things)

Sidetracked

Scarlet Angel

All the Lies

Paint It All Red (what in the jesus christ was that-)

Twisted Love ★★★.5

Twisted Games ★★★★

Twisted Hate ★★★★★ (JULESSSSS MF AMBROSE YES)

Twisted Lies ★★★.5 (I don't remember a single thing because I was too distracted by JulesJosh to actively read this </3 but one day I'll reread this the right way, pinky promise)

They Both Die at the End ★★★ (it's written in the goddamn title why was I surprised?)

Blade Breaker ★★★★ (Sorasa Sarn aka mommy-)

A Good Girl's Guide to Murder ★★★★

Good Girl, Bad Blood ★★★★★

As Good As Dead ★★★★.5 (mind-blowing. New fave series, new fave author, new fave everything. Don't sleep on Ravi Singh or I'll come for you)

Kingdom of the Feared ★★ (I am so not happy with you, Kerri, and I'd like to personally buy a vibrator for you because your horny inner teen should be left outside of your books, thank you very much)

The Final Gambit ★★★★★ (I was ready for the misery and this book managed to disappoint my expected disappointment? Make it make sense? Anyway Jameson might have gotten the girl but Grayson got me so a win is a win)

Every Heart A Doorway ★★★

Love on the Brain ★★★★.5

King of Wrath ★★★

If We Were Villains ★★★★.5 (De Nial is a river in Egypt, your husband is gay!)

Greywaren ★★★★ (everybody shut up I'm in my feels)

Cruel King ★★.5 (*sounds of dying*)

Deviant King ★★★.5

Steel Princess ★★★ (halfway through this one I got bored of the couple so I have little to no memory of what happened, so don't ask)

Twisted Kingdom ★★★

Black Knight ★★★★★ (Kimmy <3333)

Vicious Prince ★★★.5

Ruthless Empire ★★★★★ (SilverCole for the win I said what I said)

Royal Elite Epilogue ★★★.5 (the guys' groupchat 💀💀)

Addicted for Now ★★★.5 (it only took me 7 months!!!)

Kiss the Sky ★★★★

Hothouse Flower ★★★★

Thrive ★★★.5 (tandem reading this with the two before saved my ass because I could already see the other 7 months of nothingness)

Addicted After All ★★★.5

Fuel the Fire ★★★.5 (I was expecting a bit more from this but we can't always get what we want)

bonus: The Demon in the Wood, The Witch of Duva, The Tailor, The Too Clever Fox, Kill Joy.

Also, I am currently reading ("reading") Siege & Storm, The Atlas Six, and Long Way Down. I'll probably finish all of them in 2023 because I'm not in the mood to read anything right now *hides Wattpad and its trashy slytherin boys' fanfictions* so yeah, 77 books in a year is pretty damn good, isn't it?

#dee reads #2022 reads #this was a productive year #well not really since I had so much time on my hands #otherwise there was no fucking way I would've been able to read so many books

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fixingmysociallife · 1 year

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Letting go of emotional pain

G'Day Depressos,

back again and with a serious burner this time. I know I tend to ramble quite a lot anyway and this time, my story is a long one. The life lesson at the end is worth it tho, promise.

Last April was my last day of highschool and I was in bliss for about three weeks. Being out of hell finally gave me time to sleep, de-stress, plan a few nice projects and just calm myself down. However, I didn't realise what kind of risks this time in my life would bring. Today I know that I am hugely dependent on clear routines, tasks to work on and emotional support by my friends. Last year, all that stuff wasn't quite clear yet.

So naturally, my mental health slowly began to decline without me figuring out why. I became an unmotivated insomniac with rising anxiety levels and when I tried to lean into my support system...it collapsed right under my sorry ass. In this story I will especially focus on one particular friend. She and I got very close in 11th grade and from that point on, I had given her everything she could ever needed. I gave motivational speeches, hugs, carried emergency chocolate, ordered a pizza into school and went for late visits to watch a comfort movie together. She was not really stable and I was, so I didn't mind pouring some love into her, knowing that she would return it if needed.

Well.

I called her multiple times, crying and hyperventilating (surely over some bullshit that triggered my anxiety, but still) and got immediatly cut off because she was busy, usually with her boyfriend. She also never texted me afterwards or even replied in unter two days and I did not see her alone for two months. To me, it sounded like now that I required some attention and support from her, I was no longer useful or worthy of interaction. So I stopped contacting her.

My overall condition was getting worse and worse and I desperately tried to gain new friendships fast, going out with someone every other night to hang. Didn't help. By the start of summer, I was deep in a depressive phase, a new experience for me. This caused me to be all over the place, miss my friends' birthday and frankly not having energy left to deal with just myself, rather than other people.

And I didn't choose to communicate any of it to her, continued to be a bad friend without given reason and was mad about it. A few times we had a little contact, minor discomforts or arguments, but nothing serious from my perspective. I invited her to my 18th Birthday, she ghosted me for five days and then rspv'd no. Suddenly, it was the end of September. She was scheduled to leave for an exchange in middle of the month. Without a word, she was gone. And I had no idea why.

Damn, I was mad and hurt. I decided to let myself grieve, bring distance between me and the situation and get my life back together first. Maybe that was wrong, maybe that was my last chance to have a talk. Idk. Anyway, college started, I slowly got back on track and am happy and healthy now (more or less, see the entire content of my tumblr blog). She got back, I waited two weeks and then asked to meet up and talk, telling her that I didn't really know why we drifted apart. She declined with the reason that she clearly communicated her feelings and that a talk most likely wouldn't change anything.

???

Of course, I was a little perplex. It didn't sound like her to not let someone speak for themselves and completely disregard the changes a person normally goes trough in half a year and more. It was rude. It was unfair. It was wrong. But you know what? It wasn't my decision to make. Also, I had wanted an open discussion about both our faults, reasons and circumstances. Whilst she had washed herself clear of all guilt in her reply text, basically informing me that the conversation that I imagined couldn't have happened anyway. I was in a bad mood for an evening, laid off homework to watch Newsies (1992) and Legally Blonde, cried a little and got to sleep. And the next morning, I was over it.

Because I realized that, when someone doesn't want closure or help, investing energy simply isn't worth it. The memories of my friend and I together are bittersweet now, but it couldn't have that back anyway. She changed in a way that I dislike and I probably did too.

Recycling is great, but sometimes, broken things cannot be repaired and that's okay.

See you around with the next of my social adventures,

Byee!

Let's be real no one will read this monstrosity of a post.

Oh well

#self help #personal improvement #social problems #project #self improvement #emotions #friendship #positive mental attitude #social anxiety #insecurity #breakup #break up #healing #mental health

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early20sfailingplenty · 2 years

Note

Hello, i saw the post about the cards from the sinclair brother and i wanted to see if you could do me one? (Three(four)?)

My name Is Malena and i would like all the brothers (+ you if u want)

I'm rn very stressed over the preparations for holidays and school that is right around the corner, and i'm also very scared because i don't remember anything and i fell like a failure/burden to my family

If you feel uncomfortable doing this erase it without problem, i will not get mad <3 Have a nice day. -M

Hey, Malena,

Thought I'd leave y'a lil' somethin' t'keep y'company while y're at school.

I know y're worried about not bein' able to 'member anythin', but I've seen y'work on homework an' y're so determined to get it right. Y'spend so long on just one question, just wantin' t'get it right, but y'ain't gotta be scared, sweetpea. Y'doin' amazin', so so proud o'ya. I couldn't be prouder if I tried, but I do. Tryin' is half the battle, Malena – look at'cha.

Don't matter what grade y'get or don't get, y're never a burden or a failure. Not t'me or m'brothers, not anyone. Grades don't define who y're or where y're goin'; they're just letters on a page. Important when y'get 'em, but there are ways an' means around 'em. Y're working so hard and y're gonna be jus' fine, sweetpea, I promise ya'.

I'll pick y'up tonight, yeah?

See ya', love ya', miss ya'!

Lester

Malena,

Listen, darlin'. Take y'time wit' everythin' y'got goin' on, and y'KNOW y'got m'brothers an' I. None of us are gonna' leave ya' for even a SECOND, not when y're okay an' definitely not when y're feelin' like this.

M'gonna' keep y'safe, darlin', from y'self an' everythin' else puttin' pressure on you. Y'only do what you can do each day, and anythin' else can wait until tomorrow. It ain't goin' nowhere. An' neither are you – ain't no failure or burden on anyone, you hear? Echoin' Lester now (we're sharin' paper 'cause we stole it from Vincent) but aren't things said twice by two different people almost always true? Only good things, mind. Ain't talkin' about shit talkin', tha's a whole other thing.

Go out ther' and kick some ass, darlin', I know y'know how.

Lester ain't the only one proud o'ya.

From, Bo.

Malena,

I don't know why Bo and Lester thought I wouldn't find out that they had stolen paper from me. The sneaky bastards left the torn paper remnants on my desk and the sketch pad was out of place. Do they think I don't have my own method of organisation down here?

They've never been able to hide things from me, even when we were kids.

My brothers and I will help you with any holiday preparations (I noticed neither of them addressed that part of your message but that's because they didn't want to be the ones to volunteer. Next time, just tell them you need their help. They won't refuse it if you phrase it like they have no choice), as well as anything to do with your schooling. It's not easy but you're doing your best and I'm very proud of you.

Don't be afraid to ask me for help. I can break into some of daddy's books if I need to. They haven't been touched for decades but that's all right. The data may still be of some use to you.

Yours, Vincent.

Hi, Malena!

I'm so sorry this was so late – it got lost in my inbox :(

I hope you enjoyed these letters, it was a challenge to follow the same theme without repeating myself so I hope each one scratches a Sinclair itch (if you're still into this fandom, I'm not too sure but I wanted to reply to this just in case).

If you ever want to vent or anything, please feel free to send an ask or DM me – I'm almost always online so I'll reply quickly!

- Erika💖

#slasher letters #bo sinclair #vincent sinclair #lester sinclair

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strider-rambles · 14 days

Text

holy shit the first motherfucking ramble is an emo one this shit crayz

anyway. uhm. man. as a kin(?) <- dubious but thats how ill be referring to myself for now ive always like. had such a tough time finding not only canonmates, but just.. sourcemates. in general. that i vibe with. i think perhaps my vibes are occasionally mad atrocious, but it's also like. OTHER PEOPLE are half of the issue too you know

takes two to motherfuckin tango, and bro, i'm stepping on these bitches' feet like it's dance dance revolution and like as a dave kin specifically. one who like. was quite young when i got into the fandom however many years ago and, even if i didn't know the term kin back then, i kinda.. knew. or, maybe the fuckin chicken (me) came before the egg (the kin) or whatever but

whatever. it resulted in me being.. kind of in a kinshift for like 4 years during the most formative years of my life

cray-z right

doesn;t matter its just like. because it's been such a present thing through my life ive met.. so many individuals who are like. you know. other kins which is great and all, but like

i haven't found people that i've vibed with for homestuck. the majority of the people i know and interact with now are comfortably in my little kin circle or whatever, are sort of the closest thing that i have to canonmates

nothing for homestuck. well nothing beyond a dirk. but i got lucky with him and i KNOW i got lucky with him because i. we're both kind of outcasts in the community, in the sense that we're. neurotic striders, i guess.

but he's like. helped a lot with the whole feeling alone and being all emotionally constipated about it thing.

but that doesn't help with the other shit

the missing my friends shit, the approaching so many fucking people bein' all like yooo whats GOOD bros and being hit with vibes that clash with mine or WORSE. vibes that WORK WITH ME. but they already have their dave

so whats the point you know?

i'm not going to be THEIR DAVE.

i have so many diverging fucking timelines and like

im dave. im davesprite. im every goddamn iteration of this stupid fucking asshole and MORE.

and

i hate the idea of being the secondary one, i guess. which is funny because. gestures. but like

it's gotten to the point where im so DESPERATE to find people. so DESPERATE to find my bros and my homies and my gals that i like i promised myself i wouldn't do this but i'm actively going "hey i can be your secondary dave, haha" you know. all fucking pathetic and shit

but i just.

i MISS my friends. so bad. and i think part of my struggle is like this is an OLDASS FANDOM. at least in terms of the internet, and so its harder to find people who have those roles unfilled, because like it's already.. you know.

and so like.

i'm stuck here. rambling into the fucking VOID on tumblr because i'm too. fucking. i dont know late??

funny to be late as a time player but womp womp motherfucker, pull yourself up by your bootstraps and start damage control

but like

in all seriousness. i'm losing mad hope

ive gone from being like hey, yall need a dave? to hey, yall need a davesprite? to. radio motherfuckin silence.

and as a result i kinda yap at dirk too much, which totally makes me tweak the fuck out, like, dude. he has a life (albeit a totally like. chill one, that aint all that busy) and he doesnt have the time to like tend to you like youre a child with scarlet fever, and every last word that your whiny little vocal cords can muster could be like... you know. your last. like his ass is NOT writing your obituary

and so like i pull away kinda. and like. because of that pulling away i suddenly have this like. yapping desire that needs to be fulfilled but like i like having peer review. like it keeps it from being a massive fucking echo chamber of just misery and bullshit and like.

yeah

and so i.

i don't know, man. i made this blog for a reason.

i don't know if i thought it would help, or if it would like. help me connect to people, or what

what am i even doin here dawg

like theres just this existential feeling of DREAD here. doomed timeline type shit lmfaoooo i don't know though i

it could bring something good

or this could be something terrible for me

or it could be like journaling. which i used to do in physical books, because i liked doodling back then, but, ive lost that hobby, so like

this exists

but i only journaled when i didn't have friends

i have friends

i think

i just understand that those friends don't want to listen to me. frankly i wouldn't either, i mean like. read this shit again. would you really wanna sit down with your bro and hear this type of shit i don't know. this kinda turned into. something horrible haha

i'm better mentally than i was 4 years ago but whats the point when i be bitchin and moanin and whinin like this still

point is:

i miss my friends. i miss yapping (at) with them. i miss having friends in the first place. i miss feeling like i'm home, kin wise. the irony of the matter is im LOCKED OUT OF THE HOUSE. instead of uhh (checks notes) HOMESTUCK.

haha. im so funny. haha. yeah. uh. ramble over for now. i might pick this shit back up.

#emo shit #homestuck kin #homestuck #this will probably be the only post i tag homestuck. just to really get myself out there. you know. see if someone. sees this shit #shinji chair image

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silentexplosive-diary · 3 months

Text

2/13

So the last time I posted was the 4th, and honestly, so much has happened and also absolutely nothing has happened at the same time. I haven't had time to come here and rant about it, but I've been sitting on this in my brain for a few days now.

Today is Tuesday, the day before Valentine's Day. My partner and I got into a little fight on Saturday, our first fight actually. We're fine now, but I'm just going to summarize it for context.

So my partner was fired from their job a few weeks ago and spent a week looking for jobs and applying before they got hired. Turns out, they're now working as a solicitor and making commission instead of salary, so it's not a very stable job. I thought from the start that it was shady, but I did my best to be supportive and just keep my negative views to myself, as I always do in any given situation. My partner throughout the week would give me updates on how their day went, and someday last week, they had the cops called on them twice and a gun pulled out on them. They're fine, but was a little shaken up due to having PTSD from being in the military.

That was kind of the last straw for me with this job. Then came Saturday night, when they're supposed to come over to my place and spend the night so we can spend Sunday together when we're both off. I usually cook us dinner and we just hang out and spend time together.

They warned me beforehand that they were going to be late, but gave me no specific time. I texted around 5, they said they were still going to be late. I texted again around 7:30, they're still out there knocking on doors. By this point, I've talked to my mom who I live with about what I should do and if I even wanted them over anymore, and I've texted my best friend about it to try and sort out my feelings about this. I end up texting my partner that maybe they should just go home since it's so late and my dinner plans were ruined at this point (since dinner was going to take over an hour to make), and after two more hours, my partner texts me that they're just up the street.

They make it to my house around 10pm, and they can see that I'm clearly not happy. After getting them inside and locking back up, I start to talk to them and explain why I'm not happy, the main reason being that it's dangerous to be out and knocking on stranger's doors to sell shit at fucking night. I then said I wanted them to look at other jobs since this one was shady, and I pointed out details about why they're shady that I won't disclose here, and my partner heard me out, and apologized, which honestly shocked me.

This brings me to the thoughts I've been having for the past few days since we made up and are good now.

They listened to me. They apologized, more than once. And I mean an actual apology, not just a half-assed sorry. They promised to do better so I wouldn't worry or be stressed out, and I felt that they meant it. I'm not used to that.

It's no secret that I was in an abusive relationship about a year or so before my current one. My ex was a cheater and a liar all around, and I was too blinded by what I thought was love to see it. They used me to cheat and I just saw it as affection, then they cheated on me and I didn't find out until we were over. They would lose their temper and blame me, depsite taking it out on me, and their "apologies" were always manipulative as fuck. Always "I'm just a horrible person and you deserve better," or "I don't know what you want from me, everyone expects things of me."

So to now have a partner that actually listens and wants to do better? It's crazy to realize it. I was standing there in front of them, listening to them apologize properly and tell me how they were going to do better for me because they want a life with me, and I was immediately back to telling myself that it was a lie, because all previous apologies I was used to were lies. I had to convince myself to trust my current partner and remind myself that they are not my ex. These are two very different people.

So, yeah. That's what's been circling my head the past few days. Might tell my partner about it when they're back this afternoon. Who knows.

#dear diary #diary #diary entry #journal #journaling #writing #digital diary #tumblr diary #self worth #therapy #tw abuse

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shshshshshowrunner · 10 months

Note

14, 18, 29, 32, 38, 4, 20, 23, 24, 33

oh went really went for the jugular here friend.

14- biggest turns offs

it's more of a vibe than any particular thing. i can't pinpoint what happened most of the time but sometimes i will just entirely shut down and start spiraling. so i guess sometimes my brain just does the Big No and makes me smack my head into a wall

18- most traumatic experience

probably when i lost Rion and Steri. I was fully feeling then, i wasn't numb like i was when i was created. Rion and Steri, they were both cursed by a witch to be deer, and I managed to uncurse Rion most of the way. Most. he ended up being murdered by townsfolk in front of me. this was before i learned necromancy, and actually what drove me to do so. promised myself i'd never be caught off guard and lose a friend because of a skill issue ever again. steri, he... he ran off into the woods. i was driven away. i never did find him.

29- reason i've lied to a friend

wouldn't you like to know *xigbar dying in kh2.gif*

32- what words upset me the most

i super don't like when people insult me but for whatever reason it sets me on f i r e when people insult me as a (ex)wife or a mother. like bitch hello. i'm gonna insult you as a breather. the fuck do you mean you think i was a bad wife i was the best wife now shut your bitch ass mouth before i punch your teeth so far down your throat the tooth fairy's gonna need to do a colonoscopy. not fucking budging on this i was the best wife it just so happens that he was an atrocious husband. anyone would have ran, and sooner. cunt ass bitch. perish.

38- my childhood career choice

"childhood" "choice" lmao

4- do you drink

swamp sauce babie when i am stressed and crisis-ing or when xigbar becomes silly with it involved.

20- what i hate most about myself

i can't stop trying to help people and it never works and they never want it and i make everything fucking worse and i need to s t o p but i can't fucking stop because i was made to do this i can barely- if- if i don't try to help i feel like tearing my skin from my face its- literally not to quote supernatural here but the very damned touch of me corrupts i fuck everything up always.

23- my relationship with my siblings

i think about this. see, i don't have siblings, or even siblings in law. unless you count... um. gods my family tree is fucked up. if you squint and ignore the turning in your stomach, paph and arme are my half siblings. and now im trying to do math for... but no, i won't, anyway things are okay with my kids i think

24- my relationship with my parents

i killed my husband actually and i intend to do it again (date night!) and i've never seen aphrodite in the flesh after the very first time. xigdad though we watch x files on the regular it's great

33- what words make me feel best about myself

when people i care about engage with me in shared interests without it feeling like they are tolerating me or humoring me. the narrator teared up with me about destiel over lunch that was pretty great. as for specific words i like 'doll' but only coming from xigbar anyone else can die by my blade. i like 'friend' also and 'bestie' and that can come from anyone im kh-close with (have talked twice). 'bestie' can also be used by other fans of supernatural as is customary. uhm i also like being reassured that im not colossally fucking up at every turn so when people go 'yes' or 'great' or 'good job' in genuine ways it's like 'oh thank the gods i didn't just throw my whole life down the drain by fumbling that interaction'

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n3onstarss · 2 years

Text

Chap. 1 Part 3

We remained still a few minutes longer, Moon still crouched infront of me. I pretended to be absorbing and processing the words and he seemed to be inspecting me and my reaction. i wasn't really absorbing, i already had, i was just inspecting him and taking him in. He had no nose, that part was rather prominent. His eyes were comprised of a bright red, glowing even, acelera, white iris and red pupil. it looked more like there was a white ring in his eye then anything. his hat was insanely huge, tapering down to a whip-thin end and a bell. stars adorned the dark blue like freckles. speaking of freckles, Moon certainly had a few across his cheeks and what i could see of his shoulders under the vest. his once white crescent was now dull and dinged, lacking the shine it once held. his eyes were soft, watching my every movement with care. i slowly moved my hand up to cup his face, he stared apprehensively at it as if it were a snake coiled and ready to lunge. his mouth opened slightly and i could see two rows of sharp teeth, the furthermost one barely visible until his mouth was open wide.

He moved quickly, and it startled me. I slammed by eyes shut and prepared for a wave of pain.. but it never came. i peeked my eyes open to see that moon had my hand in his mouth, but wasn't biting down. simply.. holding it, in a way?

Soft chuckles emitted from Moon as my hand was released. right as i began to zone out and try to figure out why he'd do that, Moon stood up. I had ZERO clue what was going on as he walked away until i registered his hand reaching back for mine as he continued to walk away.

i jumped off the desk, almost propelling myself right into the wall. as i caught myself, arms pinwheeling to keep balance, i heard soft laughs. i began to sprint in a desperate attempt to catch up.. and slammed myself right into the floor next to moon, still reaching for my hand and i for his, as i tripped over my own two feet.

And so that was how the day continued, Moon leading me around and giving me a tour of sorts or my work area and me falling on my ass half the time. By the end of our walk me and Moon were deep in conversation, becoming fast friends.

~•~

It was the end of my shift, time to leave. i dreaded leaving Moon, especially after being informed of him being alone for so long, but i had to go home. I promised him on the way out that I'd bring something fun for tomorrow. I mean, who wouldn't being something? my shift is 10+ hours depending on the day (unpaid overtime not included) and all i have to do is sit at the desk, clean up Moon and the daycare, and keep him occupied. The notes also mentioned keeping him safe from Sun, but i didn't pry into it anymore then that.

I gave Moon a quick hug and left before either of us had time to think. helmet in hand i dashed out the door and to my bike, 7 at night, not bad! i rode home and gathered my thoughts while walking up three flights of stairs. When i passed Mrs.Daisy's door i made sure to knock in our little pattern (knock-knock pause hold two three knockity knock knock) and then, when prompted by a 'Come in!', hollered through the crack between the door and the wall that wouldn't be able to make it tonight due to work tuckering me out. a light chuckle and a okay we're hollered back and i wished her a goodnight before going home. exhausted i flopped onto bed, set my alarm, and lazily rolled into the land of dreams.

(ah, a shorter part 3! in Part 2 what events will y/n and their new best friend get into??)

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harryscuddles · 7 years

Note

Hi sorry if this is weird I’m so very very unable to socialise.. I finished rereading y&b yesterday bc you reblogged something about it. I was wondering if you had any other favourites you would mind sharing? If it’s too much of a bother please just delete this,, (I’m so sorry for being annoying alfkfk)

hiiiiii!! noo youre not weird or annoying at all!! i’m glad you asked tbh i mean most of these are the classics but theres some other really really good ones that are really worth reading!

so as requested, here’s a list of some more of my all time favourites:

Love Is A Rebellious Bird

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who “has made Mozart cool again” according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.Don’t hum Bolero.

Unbelievers

It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan.

Or: The one where Louis and Harry definitely aren’t friends, and football is everything.

Here In The Afterglow

“If you hadn’t noticed, I don’t have many friends,” Louis whispers, the blossom of insecurity in his stomach unfurling and clawing its way into his throat.

Harry is silent for a long time, and then he speaks; a soft, slow uncurl that makes Louis’ stomach shake. “I’ll be your friend.”

1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

Wild and Unruly

Harry is a cowboy sitting on the biggest oil reservoir in Wyoming, and Louis is the paralegal assigned to pressure him into selling his land.

Love’s Truest Language

The first part was meant as a joke. He didn’t really expect Harry to buy anything. It was just Louis’ way of softening the ‘get the fuck out’ blow.

“Where’s your order forms, then?”

“I don’t want your flowers.” Louis chided before directing all of his attention to the arrangement in front of him.

Harry laughed under his breath as he stood to his full height, “Who said anything about them being for you, love?”

your love is as bright as ever (baby love me lights out)

Harry’s got a late night talk show, Louis’ got a couple of Grammys, they’re best friends who like to kiss.

We’ve Got Nothing To Lose

“Oops!” A deep and slow voice fills Louis’ ears as an arm reaches around his waist, to keep Louis from rebounding into another white-outfitted body – this time a short young girl who could only be gymnast.“Hi,” Louis replies as he turns to smile up at the person and thank him for preventing Louis’ life from dissolving into a real-life game of Pong, but the words dry up in his throat when he sees.

The person is a boy, tall and lanky with curly brown hair pushed away from his face messily and held back by a gaudy Union Jack scarf, green eyes sparkling from all the camera flashes and impossibly pink lips curled in a wide smile that nearly encompasses his whole face.

And Louis recognizes him instantly. And he thinks that maybe if walking into the Olympic Stadium during the opening ceremony wasn’t enough, having Harry Styles’ arm around him might be the killing blow.Also known as an Olympics AU where Harry is a pro tennis player, and Louis is a pro footballer. They meet at the opening ceremony and fall in love, obviously.

Oh Glory

Tomlinson looks Liam over, tilting his head. “Are you a swimmer as well?”

“Yeah,” Liam says, a little cautiously. Harry wonders if it’s Tomlinson’s fame or the unimpressed eyebrow that’s making Liam wary. “Distance, I’m doing the 1500m. Harry here’s a sprinter.”

“Ah,” says Tomlinson, turning his glinting eyes back to Harry. “So you’re not an endurance man.” A beat passes, and his grin grows, wide and filthy. “Shame.”

Harry Styles is Team Great Britain’s newest swimmer, and has spent his whole life training for this moment, a chance at the gold medal in the Rio 2016 Olympics. All his training, hard work, and dedication to no distractions is tested when he’s assigned to the same Rio apartment as Louis Tomlinson, British gymnast and Harry’s childhood crush.

These Inconvenient Fireworks

Future AU in which nobody tries out for X Factor but the boys end up finding one other eventually anyway. Louis is a jaded bastard who owns a cat named Duchess and teaches drama to teenagers, Harry is an idealistic aspiring photographer/part-time footy coach, Zayn teaches English lit and wears leather jackets, Liam saves people from burning buildings, and Niall is Niall.

Pull Me Under

AU. As the first British footballer to come out at the prime of his career, it helps that Louis Tomlinson is in a long-term, committed relationship. Even if that relationship is fake. (Featuring Niall as Louis’ favourite teammate, Liam as Louis’ agent, and Zayn as Liam’s boyfriend, who just happens to be good friends with one Harry Styles.)

In Vogue

‘Is that why David Beckham has been featured multiple times on the pages of your life’s work? Does your criteria seriously consist of one thing – a man’s ass?’‘Well the ass is a man’s best asset,’ Harry smirks, holding the Martini glass high up his face. ‘And don’t call the magazine my life’s work. There are far more important things in life, Louis Tomlinson, than what’s printed on the pages of a magazine.’

Fashion AU. Louis is the editor in chief of Vogue magazine, and Harry’s running British GQ. Featuring Zayn as the crazy creative director and Louis’ confidant, Liam as the sports writer that gets to sit front row at fashion week and DJ Neil as the only sane person in the whole story. (There are no skinny jeans in this fic)

Escapade

In the grand scheme of things, finding a date for a wedding should be no problem for Louis Tomlinson. He’s rich. He’s handsome. He’s reasonably well behaved. But when the wedding is for his lifelong best friend (and former boyfriend), and is happening in under a month, finding a date for the ceremony and accompanying festivities becomes more of an adventure than he ever could have planned for.

The Dead Of July

Being an Avenger means continuing to be Captain America and smiling and being honorable for the public and Harry does his best. But it doesn’t give him time to figure out who he is supposed to be once he takes off his uniform and puts the shield to the side. Just being Harry had always involved Louis, and Harry fears he doesn’t know how to exist without him.

or: Harry is Captain America, and Louis’ been dead for 70 years.

California Sold

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

Relief Next To Me

AU. What happens when a baker and a graphic designer meet via a very specific Craigslist post? Fate, friendship, food, and maybe more.

#hello this may have been more than you wanted but #i couldnt leave any out i got a bit carried away #also i promised myself i wouldn't half ass this and i didn't #also i really fucking love the olympics #also lmk if you wanted more obscure fics rather than the classics if you've already read them all #also #pleasdnjee come scream at me about these fics #my ask box is always open but like so are my messages #i would love it if you did #thanks for asking hun!!#mine #ask arsh #anonymous #fic rec anon

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soyouthinkucanwrite · 3 years

Text

The money thing (part 2/2) - Daniel Ricciardo

Warnings: SMUT! angst, confrontation... and more SMUT!

This is it, guys! Buuut... I think I'm gonna keep this story going, what do you say? Shall we find out about how shopping with Charlotte goes, and the party, and just how (y/n) handles this new dynamic overall? As always, let me know what you think! Read part 1 here!

When you got back at home, you were barely inside the apartment and Daniel was already pushing you against the door, kissing you passionately. You go down the corridor half kissing, half walking, Daniel chasing you all the way. You run to his room and then inside the shower, taking off your sweaty clothes on the process. You guys get under the shower and the feeling of the chill water along with Daniel’s kisses on your skin is just too good.

“You’re unbelievable” he says, letting your feet touch the ground again. You wash each other clean after that, running your hands through each other’s body and memorizing every curve, every detail.

After a while, you get out of the shower, dry your hair quickly then wrap yourself in a towel. You go to your toiletry bag on the sink and take your toothbrush out, brushing your teeth while Daniel finished showering. Then you take your hair cream and put some on, your hair is really starting to feel the damage with all this boy’s shampoo, you think. Then you take some skin serum and apply some drops on your face, spreading lightly. Man, you missed skincare and it missed you. Last step: body lotion. Daniel gets out of the shower and you know he's watching you.

“Why you’re pampering yourself all up?” He asked coming behind you and kissing your neck.

“I’m doing what I was supposed to do the last two nights…but got distracted” you smirk at him. He lifts his hands in mock defense. Then you open the towel and start spreading the cream on your stomach, then your legs, then your butt. He’s watching you still, so you smile. “You say you like my skin, well it takes a lot of creaming to maintain it”

“I thought that was my job, love” He says in a low voice from behind me, putting his hands on my hips.

“Not like-” you start but decide it’s not even worthy, he knows what you meant. You just swat him on the shoulder and he laughs, going back to the room.

“By the way” he says putting his head back through the door. “You smell amazing, so finish up and get your ass back in the bed so I can properly cream you up”

“Daniel!” Little shit. He laughs even louder.

When you go back inside the room Daniel is sitting on the bed, looking through his phone. You pass him towards the closet and decide to take a look at the clothes you brought with you, to see if there's anything you could wear to this party tomorrow. What do you even wear to a yacht?

You take a few outfits and place them in front of your body, testing them on the mirror, but nothing seemed appropriate.

"You want a shirt baby?" Daniel asks you out of nowhere.

"Hum? Yeah, sure" you answer him, hanging the clothes back in the closet.

"Are you looking for something for tomorrow? Just buy something with Charlotte" he said simply while putting sweat pants on.

"Yeah... I..." you took a deep breath, "It's just..." you tried to say, but nothing seemed to come out. You were scared he was gonna think you're being ridiculous.

"What?" he looked at you.

"Nothing, never mind" you gave up, putting on his shirt with your underwear and going back to his room. He followed you, wearing nothing but his sweat pants.

"I'm just guessing here, but I have a feeling it's a good one" he started, "It's the money thing, isn't it? You don't want to spend money buying an outfit for this party?"

"It's not that I don't want to, Dan. I just can't afford it!" you said raising your voice tone a bit. He just stared at you for a while. "I don't know if you've noticed, I'm not on a million dollars contract but I'm still living like I was!" you sat down on the bed, eyes filling with water. "I just can't do this anymore, sorry. It's killing me and it's so stupid, so petty, but again, it's not! Cause what would the solution be? You paying for everything? Me just becoming a leech? A gold-digger?" he was watching you quietly, but let out a laugh at that last part.

"Don't laugh! I'm serious!" you continued.

"Baby, listen to yourself. What do you want me to do besides laughing?" he smiled sympathetically at you.

"Well, I'm glad you're finding it amusing because I feel sick everytime the subject comes up. The clothes, restaurants, plane tickets... I can't be living like that, and it's not just that. It's also because I know there's only one way this is going"

"You finally understanding this is ridiculous and accepting the credit card I made on your name months ago?" he said sitting by your side.

"Us not being together anymore. We're just from too different worlds, it's not gonna work. You need someone that can keep up with this lifestyle" you said getting up and walking towards the bathroom.

"No, you're not!" he said pulling you back down to his lap by your waist. "Enough with this bullshit" he said kissing your face and wipping your tears away. "Tell me what the real problem is. This is not about money, money is only a tool, a means to something, we can't let it have this much power over us. There's always more where that came from" you just looked at him. He had a much more healthy relationship with money than you, maybe because he had so much to spare. "This is not about money. You're not greedy, I know you. You're just the polar opposite of it. The most generous person I know. Is that it? You're feeling guilty?"

"I think... kind of. It's not fair, how can I have so much, knowing that most people have never even seen that much money. We’ve spent the average person's paycheck on a meal, Dan!" you said.

"(y/n), baby... it's not your responsibility. You can't carry this weight on you. You already do so much for people, you volunteer and donate all the time... you can't deprive yourself because other people don't have the same opportunity, that wouldn't be fair either" he tried to reason with you.

"But what about you?" you asked.

"What about me?"

"I just... listen, I know, rationally I mean... that I don't handle the idea of money very well. If you must know, I couldn't even take money from my parents as a kid. I just can't help but think it wasn't fair to them and it's not fair to you, to spend it with me. It's yours! You worked hard for it! I’m literally leeching on you!"

"So, you agree? The money is mine, so I can do with it what I please?" he said.

"Yes, but-"

"Why can't I spend it with the person I love most in the world? Huh? What is so wrong with it? Even if I was choosing to spend it on you instead of on myself, which I'm not, why couldn't I?"

"I feel like I'm taking advantage of you"

"Baby, we're taking advantage of this life. I was given this unholy amount of money for doing my dream job. Can you see how rare and fucking blessed this is? I mean, I thought so, until I met you. I thought I knew what a good life was until you were in it. This is a good life, with you enjoying this fucking lottery ticket with me" he said pecking your lips and rubbing your back, while you leaned on him. "Is this why you wouldn't come to London with me?" you looked at him and nodded.

"Sorry about that..."

"No, I'm sorry I didn't push more on the subject earlier. This has been going on for long enough now. It's just money, (y/n). Just it. Just a tool for the wonderful life we lead together. You understand?"

"Yeah"

"Look at me" he said turning your chin to look at him. "Do you really? Will you let me pay for stuff now? Tell me whenever you have an expense or even better, will you accept the credit card I made for you?"

"I don't think that's necessary"

"Please baby. Let's try it my way? Will you use it from now on?" he asked again pecking your lips. "Say yes. Say yes, or I'll give you a minimal monthly spending goal as well" he smiled and you looked at him like he was crazy.

"I'm not comfortable with it"

"Just try, please? You can start by buying something tomorrow for the party" the look on his face changed and you knew he was about to tease you. "If you'd prefer, we can say you're buying something for me... you wanna be my sugar baby?" he laughed.

"Too soon to joke about it" you said but laughed anyway. "Okay" you said after a while, "I'll use it. But you have to promise me you'll tell me if you change your mind"

"You're scared I'll go in debt?"

"I know you would"

"Good. Because I would. For you. But I know you don't need me to, so if we run out of money we'll just be poor together. Good thing you have experience, huh?" he laughed.

"Asshole!" you swatted him on the chest.

"You know I'm joking. But you get it now, don't you? We're lucky enough we don't have to worry about it, so let's not worry about it. It shouldn't even take a second of our day, it doesn't matter. Us, being together and our happiness is what matters. Okay?"

"Okay. Thank you, for being so understanding. Sorry for being... you know"

"I love you. And I don't expect you to simply go on a shopping spree, although I do expect you to buy those plane tickets soon. But the thing is, I'm here for it, I'm here to solve every little obstacle that gets in our way, no matter what, no matter how silly you're being"

"You're being so mature about this" you smirked at him.

"Well, what can I say? Being the perfect human I am, I understand that other humans are not, I'm just humbled that I can guide you on your path of enlightenment" he laughed and you rolled your eyes. "In all seriousness now, you know why is that, don't you?"

"Why? Because you're just better than everyone else?"

"Well, yes. But also because I have it really clear in my mind what really matters. And that's you. Us. It's all that matters to me. Being good for you" he said looking into your eyes.

"I love you, so much. I don't deser-" he cut you out by kissing you deeply and pulling you closer to him.

You moved so you were straddling him now, your arms around his neck and your hands on his hair. His hands that were on your waist, keeping you closer, started to slip down your body, so he was holding your bum.

"I want you" he said against your lips. You smiled and started to grind down against him. You were only wearing his shirt, which was bunched up around your waist, and your underwear, which wasn't the sexiest piece you owned but you didn't think Dan would care. In fact, he didn't seem to care at all for your underwear, cause he was already slipping his hand under you, pushing the thin layer to the side, and sliding his fingers through your lips.

You moaned at the sensation, still sensitive from your adventures early in the shower. "I... Dan..." you begin to say, but couldn't form a full sentence.

"What is it, baby girl? You want to say something?" he whispered against your ear, sucking your earlobe lightly. Then he pressed his pointer and middle finger against your clit, circling them firmly against you and making you moan louder for him.

"I'm still sensitive from early" you said against his lips, laughing a bit.

"You want me to stop?" he asked looking at you deeply.

"No!" you answered almost too fast, making him chuckle. "Don't stop, please"

"Hum... since you asked so nicely" he said sucking on your jaw, then your neck. You took that opportunity to slip your hand down his torso, feeling his chest and abs, and then reaching for him through his sweat pants. He was rock hard already. This man is insatiable. You smiled at the sound he made when you grabbed him lightly.

"I just want to feel you inside me" you said pulling his pants down and out of the way. He lifted you both from the bed slightly to help you take them off, then you grabbed and lined him with your center, sitting down slowly, letting only the head in first.

“Babe, please,” it’s Daniel’s turn to beg now “I need you" and then you sink down on him, feeling all of his length while he bottoms out inside you. He sucks on your sweet spot, muffling the groan that comes out of his mouth.

"Oh my god Dan" you moan, dropping your head back and giving him even more access to your neck. You pull his hair a bit more, fingers clamped down so tightly you're scared you might pull his hair out. You stay like this, feeling him deep inside you, for a while. He pulls away to look you in the eyes and kiss your lips, massaging your tongue with his. It's so intimate, so truthful, like he said, the only thing that matters in the world.

"I love you" he says looking you deep in the eyes. You nod before replying because you want to make sure he knows you know. That you believe and trust him.

"I love you, so much" you say back.

Then you roll your hips, testing out the angle, and it's almost too much to handle. It feels like hours and seconds at the same time, but you find a rhythm together, a pace you can keep sitting on him, while he only worries about kissing you and keeping you both from falling from the bed.

You're sure you'll be feeling sore tomorrow. Actually, you already are. Your legs, tired from the running and all the sex you've been having lately, start to give out and you lose your strength. Luckily, Daniel seems to catch that before you have to say anything, so he brings his hands to your hips and starts to help you move up and down on him.

You sit up slightly, moaning at the different angle he hitting now and he groans, feeling you clench around him. "(y/n)" he moans your name, "baby, I'm go-" he moans, feeling you clench again.

"Me too" you reply.

"Where do want me to? Huh? I'm gonna cum for you baby" you kiss him, feeling your pussy spasm around him, making it even harder for him to keep a steady rhythm.

"Inside me. I need you to come inside me, please, please baby" and there's no time to think, to ask if you're sure. You feel his whole body tensing and his thrusts get sloppier. Then, when you feel the hot liquid spur inside you, he grabs a handful of your ass with one hand and slips his other in between the two of you, flicking your clit rapidly and precisely.

That's all it takes for you to lose it completely, your walls fluttering around him as your body trembles at the intensity of the pleasure.

You both ride your orgasms together, you rolling your hips slower and slower, and him holding you tighter and closer until you stop completely. The only sound being your heavy breathings.

After a while, you pull away to find him already staring at you.

"You are the most beautiful thing I ever laid eyes on" he says to you and you feel the warmth of his words.

"I'm yours. Forever" you say simply and kiss him lightly on the lips.

"I feel like I have so much to lose. It honestly scares the living shit out of me"

"I know what you mean. I feel the exact same, I promise. I don't know how I got so lucky to find you" you say.

"And I, you. But we're just being dumb, right? I guess it's good we know that, but also... that we're not going anywhere, right?" he asks and you can sense there's some insecurity behind his line.

"Right. We're only getting stronger" you say and kiss him again. "I love you, Daniel"

"I love you, so much" he says touching your foreheads. "Let me get something to clean you up, then we can cuddle the rest of the night"

"You're the only guy I know that likes cuddling this much" you smile getting up from him. He hisses a bit at the sensation but gets up right after you.

"You don't have to worry about other guys' preferences" he says rolling his eyes. Yep. If your thing is low self-esteem and money-related issues, his is definitely jealousy and overall insecurity.

"I don't, silly" you peck him in the lips. He seems to relax a bit and when he comes back from the bathroom his phone lights up, he goes to check on it after passing you the towel.

"Charles just texted Charlottes contact. I'll forward it to you, okay?"

"Yep" you answered and it was your phone's turn to light up. "Can I confess something?" you asked him, adjusting your clothes.

"Hum?"

"I'm really excited to hang out with her tomorrow. I kind of miss girl company during the GPs and even when I'm here in Monaco and you're busy" he smiled and put a shirt on.

"Look at you, making friends! How cute"

"Shut up" you playfully pushed him, while you guys climbed into bed. You texted her 'hello' and Daniel's address before locking your phone and adjusting in his arms. There's still a lot to figure out and you weren't sure you'd be able to handle the money thing any better. You hoped so, after all, you didn't know how much more Daniel can be understanding. But you could think about all that another time. Right now life was good in the arms of the man you loved and loved you back. You felt safe.

Tag list (this is so fancy! I've never done a tag list before haha): @scotlynaurora @your-favourite-blonde @unicornfairytail @c-d-9

@isntmadrid @lharrietg @sassybatflowerpaper

#Daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo smut #daniel ricciardo fic #daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo fanfic #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #dniel ricciardo x reader

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starlessea · 3 years

Text

Here Comes the Sun: XVIII. Seven Nation Army (Daryl Dixon/Reader)

Series Masterlist: Here Comes the Sun

Summary: Daryl Dixon scares the hell out of you climbing out of that damn creek. It takes hauling his ass halfway across Georgia and taking a bullet for him to realise that you're not half bad. He slowly starts to come around, despite grumbling about how much he doesn't like your singing, or that you can't use a gun for shit - and don't get him started on that ugly yellow tent of yours. It takes him a while before he starts to see for himself that he's found a best friend for life, and that he doesn't actually mind the colour yellow that much, after all.

Words: 6040

Chapter Warnings: Language, Not full-on nsfw but QUITE SPICY, Some canon divergence.

"You're good with 'er." Daryl said, like the words had just slipped from his mouth without him realising.

You held Judy in your arms, cradling her against your chest as she looked up at you with wide, innocent eyes. Daryl seemed equally as mesmerised by the baby, as he stroked his thumb over her supple cheek and watched her give him a gummy smile in return.

You glanced over at the man, leaning against him where he stood. "So are you." You told him, but he shook his head in response.

"Nah I ain't." He muttered, his gaze still resting over Judith like she was the most precious thing in the world.

You hummed back, not wanting to break the moment you were having by arguing with him. You wished that things would stay like this forever - that Judith wouldn't cry, and the governor would never come, or that Daryl would not have to leave.

"Where are you going?" You asked the man, as he took a few steps away.

He held up a hand, gesturing for you to wait, and offered a warm smile to reassure you of his return.

"Jus' gimme a minute." He mumbled, walking towards your shared cell.

You raised your eyebrow, watching him disappear behind the bars, before turning your attention back to Judy. You thought that she had Lori's eyes, as they stared up at you in childlike wonder. You continued humming your song to her, now that the man was out of earshot and wouldn't tease you as you sang it. Daryl had suggested sticking the walkman headphones on her every time she cried, but Carol had scolded him for even thinking of the idea. You giggled, remembering the exchange, and how you just watched the two of them get along like old friends whilst you sat in the corner bouncing Judith over your lap.

Daryl came back not even a few minutes later, dragging his rucksack over the floor. He didn't have many possessions to begin with, so you cocked your head in his direction - confused about what could possibly be in there. He returned to your side, resting his arm around your shoulder as he hovered over it to make a face at Judith. You giggled, wondering what the others would say if they had the pleasure of seeing Daryl like this. Though, at the same time, you almost wanted to be completely selfish and not share that side of him with anyone.

You watched as the man fumbled around in the backpack for a bit, before pulling out a familiar, child-size sheriff's hat that couldn't possibly fit on his head. He grinned at you, taking in the way your eyes lit up in response.

"Said we'd give it to lil' asskicker, didn't we?" He teased, before placing the hat gently over the baby's head.

The sight made you want to melt. Daryl began to call Rick over to see, but you slapped his chest and hushed him before he did, wanting to enjoy the moment for yourselves just a little while longer. Daryl narrowed his eyes at you, but his expression soon softened as he noticed the way you stared down at Judith, who was staring right back. You felt like you were holding the future in your arms - and that future wore a sheriff's hat and went by the name of Judith Grimes. What you wouldn't give for a camera; you wanted so desperately to take a photo of her with her brother, and gift a copy to Rick as a surprise.

Daryl had his hand resting over the small of your back. It had hovered there at first, uneasy as usual, but it seemed like he'd forgotten his shyness for a brief moment as he watched the pair of you. You felt like a makeshift, adoptive family, and you wouldn't want it any other way. The hat started to slip down Judith's head, still too big for her yet, and Daryl tipped it back up gently with his knuckle. It was like an impromptu version of peek-a-boo. Everytime the hat fell and covered her face, Daryl would prop it back into position and the baby would smile. You weren't sure you could take it anymore; the entire exchange felt too adorable to keep from the rest of the group any longer.

Just as you were about to call for them, Judy grabbed onto Daryl's finger with her entire fist - which still wasn't able to close all the way around it. You laughed softly at the man's expression, as he stayed perfectly motionless in fear of making her let go.

"I think she likes her uncle Daryl." You whispered, and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek in your attempt to unstick the frozen statue.

To that, you could see a faint blush spread over his skin, but this time you decided not to tease him about it.

The two of you made your way to the communal area after a few more minutes, and the others quickly gathered around to get a look at Judith before they left. It was a nice break from the tension in the atmosphere, and it helped you forget, too. Rick gave his daughter a kiss and headed outside to test the vehicle they'd be driving.

Soon, the meeting with the governor would be taking place. Andrea had set it up, like she'd promised, and so Rick, Daryl and Hershel would be heading out under the guise of diplomacy. However, you couldn't say for sure that you believed in the plan very much. As you'd all established before, the governor just didn't seem like the type of man who'd let both sides co-exist peacefully.

Carl had taken his sister from you at some point, and you watched as he compared their hats and made Carol laugh with his antics. Behind you, the Greenes were bidding goodbye to their father and reminding him to be careful, and Daryl approached you under the amused eye of Merle.

"Rick says it's time to go." He told you, affirming the words you'd been dreading to hear.

You put on your best, bravest face and shot him a smile that only faltered a little. He caught it, though - he always did. He pulled you into a hug, and you leant your forehead against his chest, feeling his heartbeat there.

"Be safe." You murmured against him. "Come home this time or I'll kill you myself."

The man chuckled, which you felt rumble through his torso. You looked up at him with a playful smile and he caught your lips, giving you a quick kiss there when he thought no one was looking. In moments like these, it was refreshing to get a glimpse of the old, shy Daryl - never wanting to be in the spotlight. You nudged him gently with your elbow, sending him on his way with a teasing ruffle of his hair. Perhaps you were being too nonchalant about the situation, but you didn't want to dwell on it - or you'd become a crumbling mess like the last time.

You stood next to Beth as the rest of the group filtered out, and the others returned back to whatever they'd been doing before. The girl smiled at you, watching the way your eyes followed Daryl's back as he left the cell block.

"I'll never get used to that." She said quietly, looking between the two of you.

You thought that she'd perhaps seen the exchange take place, but you couldn't really say that you minded.

"Me neither." You confessed, and Beth giggled in response.

You remembered the jokes you'd shared with her, back at the farmhouse. You'd made a promise to talk to her about boys whenever she was sad, and let her laugh at your misfortune in return. Yet, things hadn't exactly played out like that. Daryl was a world away from those bad experiences you'd once recounted to her, but you somehow seemed even more nervous to talk about him in their place. Perhaps it was because you wanted to keep the man all to yourself, just like earlier - as though the very act of speaking about him would disclose some kind of secret you weren't willing to share. Daryl Dixon was yours, but you felt almost too shy to admit it.

"I used to think that Daryl would be the last man standing." Beth confessed, startling you. "Out of all of us."

You nodded back, letting her words sink in.

"I can see why. He's like a one-man army." You replied with a smirk, thinking back on all the times he had proved himself so.

Though Beth shook her head, seeming to almost disagree with herself. You stayed silent, awaiting her response.

"But I don't think that anymore." She told you, like she was completely certain of herself. "It'll probably be you."

Immediately, you raised an eyebrow, wondering if you'd misheard her. Beth's expression didn't change, so you let out a snort in disbelief - amused by the seriousness of it all.

"Me?" You repeated, looking over at her like she'd gone mad. "Why's that?"

The youngest Greene bit her lip, as if deliberating whether to tell you her next words. Eventually, she gave you a light-hearted smile, as though having finally decided to reveal a secret.

"Because there's no way Daryl would let you go down before he did."

You spent the majority of your time waiting in your cell, trying to keep yourself busy by cleaning it up. Daryl had hauled his mattress into the room, and the two of you had abandoned the bunk frame in favour of pushing the two beds together on the floor - creating a makeshift double. You'd also stolen an extra sheet from the laundry room and hung it over your doorway for some privacy. It was still a far cry from the decor of Hershel's farmhouse, but it was starting to feel more comfortable nonetheless. Daryl had given you some thin rope from his rucksack, too, so you'd been able to replace the fraying string from which your polaroids had been strung up. It still wasn't a home yet, but it could be.

The last few days had been tense, so you couldn't blame yourself for slumping down onto the mattress and staring up into a starless, stone sky for a while. You followed the cracks on the ceiling like you were trying to create patterns there, and eventually you felt your eyelids grow heavy as sleep overcame you easier than it had done for as long as you could remember.

When you woke up, the room was dimmer than it had been before, and you thought that it had to be late evening. You'd roused to the sound of footsteps approaching, echoing over the catwalk as though the person wore thick, heavy boots. You smiled to yourself, instantly recognising who they belonged to. The metal doorway squeaked open, and some light filtered in as Daryl lifted the sheet hanging there, letting it fall back down behind him as he entered. You greeted him, but he was wordless in response. He shrugged his leather vest off and let it fall to the floor, not even bothering to place it anywhere.

You raised an eyebrow at the man, debating whether to scold him for making the cell messy when you'd spent your whole day trying to make it nice for him when he got back. Yet, you took one glance at Daryl's face and decided against it. The man looked exhausted. Probably not physically, you realised, but definitely mentally. He seemed to have a permanent scowl tacked onto him, and you could make out the frown lines over his forehead even in the poor lighting. So, you said nothing when the man tugged off his boots and flung them at the wall - where they fell with a thud into a pile.

Sitting up on the mattress, you plumped your pillow against your back and rubbed your eyes. You could almost feel the stress radiating off Daryl as he paced back and forth, so you patted the spot beside you and pulled back the covers to invite him in. He eyed you for a second, as if considering the offer, before taking a seat there. Though, he didn't allow himself to lay down or make himself comfortable, and instead stayed sat over the edge of the mattress with his back to you. Slowly, you crawled over to him, before perching on your knees and resting your head on his shoulder.

"How'd it go?" You whispered, but knew you could probably guess the answer.

Daryl's back was tense; you could feel it. Tentatively, you began to knead your fingers over it, trying to work out the knots in his muscles. Instead of flinching like he usually did, you felt the man relax into you as you pressed your knuckles along his spine.

He growled, but the sound became lost in his throat as you rubbed along his shoulder blades. "It ain't gonna work out." He muttered, eyes closed as he said it.

You hummed in response, more preoccupied with the sounds the man was letting out than his words. It reminded you of being back at the farm, and those days where he'd try to relieve the tension built up in your stiff arms and neck from learning how to shoot.

"Why?" You asked, feeling the deep breath he took underneath your palms.

"Jus' ain't." He replied, but his voice came out strained.

You ran your thumbs down his spine in tandem, all the way from the top of his neck to his lower back, and you felt him shiver slightly under your touch.

"Okay then." You said, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

Daryl opened his eyes and glanced back at you.

"Tha's it?" He questioned, like he'd expected something more from your response.

You hummed back, returning to pressing over his shoulder blades. Though, the man turned around this time, bringing his legs onto the mattress as he looked over at you.

"I trust you. And I trust Rick." You explained, meeting his questioning eyes. "Whatever we have to do, we'll do."

Daryl frowned, and looked at you like you didn't understand in the slightest. You did, but you didn't want to burden him any more than you had to.

"We gotta gear up for war." He told you, narrowing his eyes like he was trying to convince you of his words - or wait for them to sink in.

You nodded at him, reaffirming that you understood.

"Then we better start loading our guns."

Daryl seemed to break at your words, shaking his head like you'd answered him in the way he'd least wanted. This time you didn't understand, and ran your thumb over the back of his hand to try and coax out an explanation. The man sighed, and took your fingers in his palm as he pressed a kiss over the tips of them.

"Don' wan' ya to have to fight." He admitted quietly, but knew he didn't have a choice.

You shuffled forward a little, so that you were almost sitting in between the man's thighs. His head was low, and he couldn't quite meet your eyes until you spoke.

"That's not up to you to decide." You said, but did so as gently as you could. "It's not like lil' asskicker can hold a rifle yet."

His eyes flickered slightly at the mention of Judith, and you understood that completely. He realised that as much as he wanted to keep you safe, there were now other people who needed his protection more.

"I'm not worried." You reassured him, and pressed both of his cheeks under your palms until he pulled a face that made you laugh.

"I'll be fine because you're here." You told the man, and watched as his expression seemed a little lighter than it had done. "And you're all that I need."

He pulled you into his chest and fell back against the mattress with you in his arms, and you giggled as your noses pressed together. You moved your knees so that they rested either side of his hips, not wanting to crush the man as he squeezed you tight against him.

"What I do to deserve ya?" He mumbled into your hair, and it tickled your ear.

You sat upright, so that you were looking down at him and watching as your hair trailed over his cheeks.

"Hmm, I don't know." You said with a grin. "Bribe me with pretty flowers and music players?"

He smiled back softly, and took the ends of your hair between his fingers, playing with them where he lay. You felt a bit exposed, practically sitting on the man's torso and straddling him as he just stayed perfectly still, content beneath you. For once, you felt like the shy one, as he rubbed over your thigh with his hand - tracing shapes over your jeans. You thought about his question once more, and decided that he deserved a serious answer, too.

"When I first saw you trying to haul yourself up that cliff, you gave me a purpose." You admitted smally, catching his attention like you hadn't even realised you'd lost it. "I think that's reason enough."

Daryl let the small wisps of your hair fall from his fingers as he looked up, focusing on you completely.

"A purpose?" He asked, like the word was foreign on his tongue.

You nodded, trailing your fingers over his chest absentmindedly.

"Even if it was just to get you back to your camp at first." You mumbled, almost like you were talking to yourself as you voiced your innermost thoughts. "Before that, I was just living day to day."

You smiled at the memory, thinking that it was perhaps your favourite one. You'd felt so young back then, but at the same time so old. The world had really had its way with you before you'd stumbled upon Daryl and his group. You might have only been in your mid-twenties, but those few months after the collapse had aged you more than you cared to admit. It wasn't until you met Daryl that you remembered how it felt to be young again.

"One of the first things you asked me back then was why I helped you." You recalled, letting your nails lightly run across his chest, sliding upwards to the exposed skin of his neck.

He stayed silent, like putty in your hands as you spoke.

"I remember finding it a really hard question to answer." You whispered softly, like you were revealing a secret to him. "I ended up saying that I only wanted the chance to be a good person."

Daryl's skin was warm as you ran your thumb along his jawline, surprised at how docile he'd become under your touch.

"But I think that was a lie." You smiled, and the words felt almost devious to admit. "I'd forgotten what it was to even be a person before I met you."

You leant down to press a kiss to his lips, and pulled away before he could kiss you back.

"Thank you for reminding me, Daryl."

You looked down at the man sweetly, like you'd just poured out your entire heart to him. And, he decided to give you his in return.

Suddenly your world spun like clothes in a washing machine as the man flipped your positions, and you snorted rather unflatteringly as your back hit the mattress. Your legs were still wrapped around his waist, but now he kneeled between them - with your thighs either side. Your laughs soon trailed off as you noticed Daryl's expression, and you suddenly became quiet without having even realised it.

He leant down to capture your lips, but pulled away before you could deepen the kiss - just as you had done.

"Ya can't just go sayin' shit like that an' expect me not to do nothin'." He growled near your ear, and you quickly realised how dangerous your situation had gotten.

You looped your hands around his neck and pulled him back down, threading your fingers through his hair and letting your nails drag along his scalp. He rested one of his palms over the mattress as he hovered above you, but the other one came to your cheek as your lips met again. You could distinguish Daryl's kisses so easily by now; you knew the soft morning ones from the emotional ones with trembling lips, or the teasing pecks that made you laugh - and that's why you could easily tell that this one was needy.

He bit your bottom lip between his teeth and you immediately whimpered against him, feeling your head spin at how fast everything happened. You'd gone from the washing machine to the dryer without even realising it, and you felt yourself get equally as hot and disorientated.

"Daryl-" you mumbled against his lips, hooking your ankles together around the back of his torso.

He moaned in response but said nothing, letting his thumb trail from your cheek to your neck, where he rested it over your quickly beating pulse. You had your palms pressed flat against his chest, rubbing over the area and feeling the warmth radiate from him. You wanted to take the shirt off, and feel his skin over yours, but you were too preoccupied by his lips on you to do so. He kissed you with more pressure, and you whimpered again as you felt yourself becoming more lost to his touches. You'd thought that Daryl Dixon was a shy man, but recently he seemed adamant to prove you wrong

You unintentionally squeezed your thighs tighter around him, as you felt your head being pushed back further into the mattress. Your jeans rubbed against his uncomfortably, and you felt the buttons dig into your hips and chafe your skin every time you moved. You pulled away for a brief second to catch your breath, and took in the dangerous sight of Daryl Dixon.

You realised that perhaps you'd made a mistake - when you looked at him, that is. His lips were swollen a blush red, and his pupils were blown as he watched you, watching him. You looked away first, feeling shy under his gaze. You wondered how this had happened - when it had happened. You hadn't thought of yourself as the nervous one, but you were made nervous for him.

Without meeting his eyes, you tugged at the hemline of his shirt - making it clear what you wanted. He kissed your forehead gently, and you almost got whiplash from how quickly the man could switch from giving you deep, intense kisses to leaving sweet pecks over your skin like he was afraid you might break. He moved back from you, sitting up so that he was kneeling in between your legs, and pulled off his shirt without you having to ask.

You bit your lip, taking in the sight of his barreled chest and toned muscles as he threw the shirt over his shoulder for it to get lost somewhere in the sheets. You didn't get too stare long, because he was back on top of you in an instant - almost like he'd never left. Though, you didn't mind much, because now you could feel the warmth of his skin pressed against your own chest. Softly, you gasped just from the intensity of it, but Daryl quickly caught your lips and silenced it. You ran your hands up his back, feeling the ridges of scars and the contours of his muscles as he held himself up. You allowed your nails to dig into him slightly, enjoying the way he moaned against you as you did.

Even inside the walls of a prison, Daryl's voice sounded so good up against your ear, as he left your abused lips to focus his attention on your neck, instead. You immediately turned your head to the side in response, feeling your cheek press into the pillow and muffle any noises you made there. You tried to stay quiet, but it seemed like Daryl was intentionally out to make you fail. His tongue ran along your neck and you scratched him particularly hard on his back, stuttering out an apology as you removed your hands and clenched the sheets instead.

It didn't seem to bother the man, however, as he continued to work his way down until his teeth grazed over your collarbone and made you cry out. You quickly shot him a warning look, and he glanced up at you for a brief second before he did it again. It felt utterly euphoric, so you moaned under him unintentionally before you felt him chuckle against your skin.

You would have scolded him, or pulled a face, but your words felt so far away that you doubted you'd be able to form a complete sentence even if you tried. One of Daryl's hands had wandered to your waist, and then dipped lower to your hip. His thumb ran over the bone there, and it sent shivers through you as he gripped your skin tighter. You ran your palms over his bare chest in response, still not entirely used to the feeling. He stopped what he was doing, probably leaving some marks over you without you noticing, and ran his finger along the oval collar of your vest.

"Take it off." He mumbled, his lips still pressed against the skin just above it.

A whine left your mouth before you'd even realised it, and you didn't think Daryl Dixon even knew how he sounded right now. He pulled back to look at you, cheeks all flushed and eyes glossy where you lay beneath him, and you nodded.

He helped you shrug the vest over your head, and left it lying next to you on the pillow. You turned away from his eyes almost instantly, feeling more exposed than you had in a while. He had trusted you, and you wanted to be able to give him your trust in return. Yet, you couldn't help but feel shy under a gaze that intense. You reached your arms over your chest, like you were trying to shelter yourself from the cold - despite being incredibly hot.

The man narrowed his eyes at you, not happy with your decision in the slightest. He leant down so that his lips hovered just above your stomach, and you expected him to place a kiss there in hopes of coaxing your arms away. Except, he didn't. He blew a raspberry against your skin and you all but screamed as you wriggled beneath him, and flung your hands out to push him away.

"Stop!" You yelled, but it had come out strained between a mixture of giggles.

You felt the man smile against your stomach as you panted deeply, in utter disbelief about what he'd just done. Your arms rested either side of you, hands tangled in the sheets just like he'd planned, but you weren't happy at the cost you'd had to pay. You glanced down, ready to chide him, but stopped when you noticed how quiet he'd gotten.

Daryl's eyes were fixated on your waist, and he ran his thumb gently over the small scar there - as though afraid to press too hard and hurt you. Your eyes softened when you saw his expression, and the way he chewed his lip between his teeth. You knew that guilty look from a mile away, and you wouldn't let him wear it any longer.

"Don't." You said into the silence, lifting his hand away from the little indentation there.

You brought his knuckles to your lips and left kisses over them, offering him one of your best smiles in hopes of coaxing one out of him in return.

"It was worth it." You told him. "I'd take another bullet for you if I had to."

Daryl let his forehead drop against your hip, like he was completely exasperated by the response, and muttered something below his breath.

"Why's everythin' that comes outta yer mouth so damn sweet?"

He crawled back up the bed and kissed your lips as if to prove his point, and you moaned against him - having missed the feeling. You were chest to chest, skin pressed fully against each other as you arched your back to try and get even closer. Your fingers trailed lightly over his arms, and you could almost make out the rhythm of his heartbeat as your chests heaved together in time. He reached a hand down to the button of your jeans, and pulled away from the kiss to wait for your response.

Nervously, you glanced over towards the entranceway of your cell, only covered by a thin sheet draped there.

"What if someone hears?" You whispered, suddenly aware of how loud you'd perhaps been beforehand.

Daryl dotted some light kisses over your neck, trailing them down as he spoke between each one he gave.

"Don' care." He mumbled, reaching your sternum.

"Don' care if Rick comes to tell us Randall's gone walk about." He said, and tickled your stomach with his lips.

"Don' care if Carol knocks to say the governor's here with an army an' wants his fuckin' walkman back."

He got to your hip, and this time noticed the tattoo that just about peeked out over the top of your jeans. He raised an eyebrow, and you smiled sheepishly in response.

"Don' wanna wait anymore." He said softly, and neither did you.

He sat up and rested his palms either side of you, looking down at your face with the most affection you'd seen from him yet.

"Okay, then." You whispered back, and interlocked your fingers with his. "I'm yours."

You woke up to warm, morning light streaming in through the pale curtain of your cell, and landing on your cheek. Your eyelids fluttered, and it took you a few seconds to adjust to the brightness - feeling the tears well up as you did. You hummed into Daryl's chest, lying over it with your palm resting there. You'd slept so well, but you'd woken up even better.

His bare skin was warm against yours, so much so that you didn't feel the need to pull the sheets up higher to cover you. You rubbed at your eyes, finally opening them to notice that the man was already awake. You'd been tucked in the crook of his neck, your head just over his shoulder, but he'd been looking down at you as you roused from sleep. Shyly, you smiled at him, and hid your face back into his skin. You felt his laugh rumble there, low and groggy.

"You been up long?" You asked, the words coming out thick as you said them.

You felt him shake his head, but weren't too sure if he was telling the truth. His arm rested over your waist, and you had only just become aware of the weight of it as he rubbed his thumb over your hip beneath the covers.

"What is it?" He murmured. "Didn't ask ya 'bout it las' night."

It took you a few seconds to realise what he meant. You shrugged back the sheet, looking at the part of your body he was referring to.

"I think you were a little preoccupied." You teased, and he pinched your skin there in response.

The ink stood out strongly against your paleness, dotted over your lower hip so that it was concealed even when you wore low-rise jeans. You recalled that night back at the Greene farm, where you all shared secrets over the campfire and the group had seemed surprised to discover that you had a tattoo. Nobody else had ever seen it; Daryl was the first.

"It's a rune." You told him, feeling his calloused fingers trace over the lines so carefully. "They were one of the things I studied before all this."

A small blush worked its way onto your cheeks, as you suddenly felt embarrassed under the man's intense gaze.

"Looks like an arrow." He noted, inspecting it closer.

You hummed in response, not having thought of it that way before.

"I guess it does, doesn't it?" You chuckled, thinking how appropriate it was for the archer to have been the one to notice.

"It's the symbol of the Norse god Týr." You explained, and he watched you talk passionately without interrupting. "Have you ever heard of the story of Sigurd?"

Daryl shook his head with a small smile, already knowing that you were going to tell him no matter how he answered.

"In the sagas, he slays the dragon Fáfnir and carves the runes of Týr into his sword." You said, excitedly. "They're meant to be the sign of a warrior. To ensure certain victory."

Daryl seemed perfectly content, gazing down at you as you spoke with so much life in your voice. It reminded you of that first night where you shared a bed together in the Greene's spare room. Even then, having barely known you more than a day, the man allowed you to ramble whilst he listened in silence. He'd made out like he was ignoring you, but every small detail you'd given during those early morning hours he'd seemed to recall - even a few weeks later. But now, you thought it was slightly different. He made no attempt to pretend like he wasn't interested in your stories, or that you talked too much for him to stand. He looked at you like your words were law, but he'd somehow ended up in a prison anyway.

"Tha' why ya weren't scared 'bout facing the governor?" He teased, once you'd finished your brief lesson. "Certain victory?"

You snorted, having only just realised the irony of it all.

"No." You admitted, slapping his chest lightly as you laughed.

Maybe it was the rune, but it was more likely the one-man army at your side who assured you of that victory.

"I think this tattoo would be much more suited to you than it is me." You confessed, tracing its shape over the back of his hand.

He watched you make your invisible markings, and remained wordless as you did so.

"I got it just after I started teaching. To remind myself to be brave." You told him, and this time he was the one to laugh.

"So teachin' students was as hard as slayin' a dragon?" He questioned, and you could practically hear the smirk through his voice.

You raised your head from his chest to look at him in mock offense.

"If I had a student like you, then maybe." You teased, and the man grabbed the sheets and bundled you up in them tightly as you struggled against him.

The two of you lay there for a while, not quite yet ready to face the day. You knew the inevitable would be coming soon, and you wished you could just pause this moment as easily as you paused the songs on your walkman - immortalising it in an old, labelled cassette.

"A lot of the time I don't feel very brave, but I've decided to trust it more recently." You mumbled, feeling the edges of sleep start to return.

Daryl questioned you, before realising that you had carried on with the earlier conversation - seemingly by yourself. You felt him trace over your hip again, but your eyelids were too heavy to look at him.

"There anythin' ya don't know?" He grumbled, but it was too playful to be considered so. "Yer too smart for yer own good, Sunshine."

You hummed against his chest, wanting nothing more than for the morning hours to drag along slower, and for the night that followed to stand still.

"I could tell you stories of dragons and knights, and speak to you in languages that have long since faded away." You told the man, but it came out half-hearted and muffled against his skin.

"But there are still many things I don't know, Dixon." You admitted. "Like what I did to deserve you, too."

A/N *mic drop* Ok but for real, who let me have alcohol whilst writing this??? Tipsy me gets WAY TOO SPICY WAY TOO QUICK- The chapter plan had way more in it, but I accidentally threw the plot out the window because I got preoccupied *cough*...

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itsmadamehydra · 3 years

Text

My Savior || Wayne McCullough

A/N: Just some teenage girl trying to write the story inside her head, hope u like it.

Pairing: Wayne McCullough x oc

Warnings: rape, intention of rape, harassment, blood mention, bullying, language (a little strong)

.................

I've always like to watch him by far, he just seems different from the rest (and oh boy, he is).

The first time I saw him I was in 7th grade. I was just one more girl of the many others that her tities just had started to show and my period started to visit me. I remember that day clearly, I was sitting at the hallway with my bestfriend at the time, eating infront of our lockers when I saw him.

"Am telling ya girl, the answer of number 5 was c." I said trying to reason with her about the science test answers "I told you that if u needed help to study, I could help ya." I smile at her and move my arm upward to touch her shoulder

"Yeah, yeah, I know...are you sure it was not D?" she said frowning her eyebrows once more. We stayed in silence for a sec before bursting into laughter and tears

Little by little our laughs started to fade, allowing ears to hear the background and aswell some loud voices, it sounded like an argument but by the hears of it a fight was going to start soon. "What you think is happening over there?" Cassie murmured, I stared at the end of the hallway where apparently was were the voices were coming from.

"I don't know..." my lips formed a thin line while I was thinking about what could have been happening in there, "You wanna, you know, go and see?" I looked back at my friend

"Freak yeah" she laughed grabbing my hand and running down the hallway to see the soon to be fight.

Once we got there, there was a mass of students surrounding what appeared to be the ones who where arguing. "Ugh, I can't see, I hate been so small." I said, "Hey, that smallness is beautiful and you know you can use that in your own benefit" Cassia said and winked at me.

"I mean, yeah but I can't-" my word stopped at the moment I heard a want sounded and I believe to be a punch in the face. "You saw that!?" Cassie said, "That was freaking awesome, please tell me you saw it!" "Um, nah Cassie, I cant see a crap" i said while trying to find a whole where to see through.

It was only a matter of seconds until more punches were heard. I started pushing people more frantically, I wanted to see what was happening. When I get pass a few amount of studens I almost slipped, looked sown to see what was it and it was stains of blood, only a few but still.

"Oh gosh, disgusting." When I look up only a few students are still in the cafeteria and a guy wearing a grey hoddie was just there, staring at the bloodie face of another guy. I stared back at the hoddie guy and noticed a little hammer in his hand, and the words just came out of my mouth without even noticing, "Why the hammer? Want to be a constructed or something?" He just stared at me and pass by me without saying a word and keeping a neutral face.

"Who the hell was that crazy ass weirdo?" I hear Cassie's voice behind me. "I don't know" I responded, "But I will know...one day."

"Ok,ok, am not going to get in between your little search thingi but am sure he is not good news." Cassie said, "You saw what he did, and he has a FREAKING hammer, y/n! Covered in blood y/n!" She grabbed my shoulders from behind, "I think we all understood the message, stay the fuck away from him, honey."

And I just smiled.

Months later I learned his name. Wayne, Wayne McCullough. Fits the ring if you ask me. Everyone was speaking about how violent, crazy and wierdo he was, about how he was going to show up at your house to beat the hell put of you.

I just observed him by far, well, I like to think that I noticed him. I noticed how he usually beats up those who are some assholes jerks that have only one brain cell as much. Noticed that he is not much of a talker and a shy boy. Noticed how he makes his lips thin when he gets lost in thoughts. How he closes his fist when he is about to do something. His strangely high pain tolerance. His pale skin and dark hair appeared to me to be very llamative and aswell his strength. He was and is skinny but somehow has a great strength, maybe do to the unincredible amounts of fights he gets in. Experience makes the master is what the say...right?

Years went by, we entered to highschool and the nervousness along with the fast beating, sweating and butterflies were still there every time i either tought about him or saw him walking around.

Cassie stayed with me for a while until she decided to join the group of nasty ass bitches with no brain cells who believed no one was better than them. While I...well, I stayed small for a big part I guess, always with good grades, teachers love me and try to be nice with every one I guess.

Everything was going great until Cassie along with some guys recorded me somehow while being drunk and them trying to overpass the boundaries, and let me tell ya.. that was just the start.

The had videos of me at the school bathroom, pictures of my underwear under my skirts and dresses, them trying to touch me. I had to learn to defend myself, stopped using skirts, dresses, shorts even do I loved wearing the. Replace my shoes with tennis and always had hair ties.

"Y/n, wake up! You're going to be late for school, don't think ama wait for you!" I mom yelled.

"Yes, mom! Dont worry, am up!" I run down the stairs with my backpack, went to the kitchen, grabbed an apple and went straight to the car.

"Oh for God sake, y/n" she said went she looked at me and noticed my new hair style.

"What? You don't like it? I just cut it a little." I satered at her innocently

"Your father is not gonna like it and you know it." She said and the stress lines appeared in her forehead, "You know this is his weekend and-"

She couldn't finish her sentence because I started taking, "Am not going to that dickheads house, mother." I said strainly, "Don't want to see his and face of that bitch he cheated you with..." i lowly said but loud enough to hear.

"I know, honey but you have to and besides you get to see your brother!" She patted my thigh, "Haven't seen him in a while right?" She said with a sad tone

"You should be the one seeing him...not me." I stared outside the window, there were just some trees and houses and garbage.

Mom and dad divorced a while back, he cheated on her. The house was a mess that day, screams and broken glass everywhere. Sammy was lucky, he was at grandma's but I was home...listening to every single word. That was also the first time a sneaked out and the first time I sort-of spoke to Wayne.

"What are you doing here?" I heard someone said behind me, I looked and it was fucking Wayne

"Just trying to have some quietness i guess..." I stared at my fingers and started playing with them because of my nervousness, "...What are you doing here?" I asked softly

And he stayed silent...the whole time after that. Either way, his company was nice and the side profile, ufff, amazing.

"Ok, we are here." I stared at the building for a sec before giving my mother a kiss in her cheek and entered to the building.

"Hey y/n! Nice ass!" That was the jerk of all jerks, Jonathan.

I turned around and stared at him, "Oh yeah?" He nodded, "Want to see me shop of your dick?" Changed my tone while saying that into a lower and more serious tone. He just stared at me with sealed lips and left.

I continued walking to my locker and I come to see tgat my freaking lock is broken, I search in all the spaces but nothing is missing.

"Come on! They had just changed me of locker!" I silently yelled. Started grabbing my books for the next few classes when I felt a hand in my shoulder, by instinct I grabbed the wrist, pushed the person against the locker and added pressure in the throat with my other arm.

"Hey y/n" Orlando smiled, "New move?" I chuckled and removed my arm, now, standing face to face I respond

"You know you shouldn't do that Orlando bunny." I laugh st the nickname I gave him a few time ago. Orlando was one of the few FEW people who talked to me, well, he talked to everyone but still.

"I know... I just forgot I guess man." He looked down, "Y/n...have your tities grown bigger?" His face looked confused.

I slapped his head and punched his shoulder, "Could you please stop looking and thinking 'bout tities when am around you?"

"I mean, yeah sure...and sorry about your lock." He points the locker, "Wayne thought it was still his but since-" I cut him off before he could continue

"Wayne?" I asked confused

"Yeah, Is tha-" i cut him off again

"Why did he tho?" I murmured staring at my lock in hand.

"It used to be his locker but oh well...he missed school for 3 weeks and yeah." He grabs his backpacks laces after explaining.

"Oh...ok, is he still here tho?" I looked at Orlando

"I guess..." he was about to say pther thing when the bell ring and we started to go toour classes, "See you later gorgeous!" He yells from the corner of the hallway.

I stayed there...just staring at my lock for a while, then order my things fast and left to class. What I didn't know was that someone was watching at me.

Three days later, i was walking back home and i heard s car going at full speed and nasty comments were started to be listend. I kept walking trying tk pretend they didn't exist when the car is suddenly over the sideway and infront of me.

"YOU COULD HAVE KILLED ME ASSHOLES!!" I yelled.

"But...you are bot dead right, bitch?" Jonathan said getting out of the car. There were five, 2 guys and 3 girls. "Don't prefer to suck my dick and be my slut, promise I'll pay a good amount." He said infront of me,

"She is already a slut baby." Veronica said

"I bet she has sleeped with half school, wouldn't surprise me if you haven been org*e or something." You know, comments are comments, you are the one who decide what hurt you and whats does not, but being Cassie the one who said that...broke my freaking heart.

I couldn't stand it anymore, wanted to leave the place so i came up with a plan very fast. I walked closer to Jonathan trying to be the most seductive I could, touched his chest, abs and got closer to his ear and said, "You are going to regret everything" Punched him with all my strenght in this genitiles, stomp on his feet, punched his nose and ran the faster I could out of there.

"You bitch!" I heard from far but i continued running, I couldn't stop, i was scared, didn't know what could happen if the get me. I could hear the car engines behind me, but i didn't stop.

I was close a bridge, ran underneath it, passed some houses but i could still hear the voices and car. My legs hurt, i needed to catch my breath, i could hear my heart beat, my body felt on fire. When I less expected am suddenly trapped, there were some abandoned buildings and warehouses but no way to get put of there. This was it, my end.

"Couldn't escape from me you nasty little bitch!?" I heard his voice, i was never one to pray but believe when i say i begged to God to save me. "You ain't going anywhere...bitch" he was behind me, I could sense it.

My hair was pulled, he pulls me by my hair to his car and i notice that it's just him and another guy. Am not getting out of here.

"We are going to have so much fun!" He licks my cheek and i try to kick him wherever.

"HELP!" I yelled, "SOMEBODY PLEASE, HELP!" my voice sounded horrific, like if i hadn't drank a single drop of water in ages, "please" y murmure my last pledge before he finally puts me over the capo of his car.

"No one's gonna help you, you slut." He says, the other guy was just watching and standing still, doing nothing.

I gave up, didn't even notice I was crying until I tasted the salt in my lips. I felt him over me, unbucking my pants and then...i didnt felt his weight anymore, instead, i heard a cry of pain, and then another cry, and another and another.

I lifted my head and there he was, grey hoddie and little hammer in hand...my savior. I smiled.

My smile just grew bigger and bigger every second I saw that boy swing that motherfucker hammer, every second that Jonathan's blood was spilled. I lool around in search pf the pther guy scared that he might try to grab but I get calm when i see him unconscious on the floor.

A few minuts later th cries stop and i look up, Jonathan was missing 3 teeths and face covered with blood, i think he could even have a brocken rib or something.

Am sitting on top of the car's capo when a feel a slight, fragile touch.

"You ok?" Wayne askes pulling a string of my hair behind my ear.

"...now I am." I smile to him and he returns a little small tiny one with a grin. I was about to say something else when he suddenly speaks

"Want to be my girlfriend or whatever?" He says looking exhausted, I chuckle

"Try a little harder and I might be." I say soflty with a small thin smile and he avoids my eyes but I still get to notice a small blush.

...................

Hey! So, yeah. This is my first ever published thing. Hope you enjoyed it and if you want a part two or to keep writing, am open to any suggestion! Am not very good with the warnings section so if you could help me with it, i would totally apreciate that!

Thank you for reading,

#fanfic #wayne mccullough #wayne mccullough x reader #wayne mccullough x y/n #fanfiction #wayne mccullough fanfic #wayne mccullough fanfiction #wayne #wayne x reader

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impala1967dwinchester · 3 years

Text

Sam Winchester: Out of the closet

Pride Collection 2021 June 5th

Pairing: AU! Sam W. x Sister!Reader

Pov: Y/n

Warnings: Coming out, support from a family member. Mentions of Dean and John.

Summary: Finally feeling comfortable you tell Sam your biggest secret, but you think NO you know he can handle it seeing as he is your big brother.

Word Count: 1.4k

A/N- Bisexual, @firefly-graphics for the bisexual dividers Supposed to be posted on the 5th of June, but was unfortunately postponed to the 6th of June

Sam Winchester Master List

Main Master List

Pride Collection Master List 2021

Today is the day that I'm going to tell Sam my most important secret.

I've had this secret for years now. It started my last year in high school, and with Sam being the older brother is, when he left for college he took me with him.

Anyways, He got me set up in an apartment, he came and visited me every other day. Going to class, and just being normal was nice, and it lasted for a while.

There was a party for the seniors that year. I toyed with the idea of dressing up and going out or just stayin' home and studying. I was very much Sammy when it came to my schooling. Something that I'd just learned from him over the years.

I just made a choice deciding that one night of partying wouldn't hurt me or my schooling. So I dressed up in a short red dress, black flats, and the only thing I had taken with me before leaving Dean and John.

Slipping into a black jacket that was a size too big, but smelled like my older brother Dean. I grabbed my keys and left. I had never gone to a party if you don't include the father-daughter dance that John half-ass took me to the Sam ended up having to save me from. Or the random school dances that I had.

Showing up to this party everyone's eyes were on me. It was a weird sensation to be stared at but in a sorta good way. In a way that made me wonder.

Very quickly I had a few guys surrounding me, their actions were pointless as I ignored them, and I left them to discuss between themselves. One good thing that John has taught me was not to take shit from anyone, I think he forgot that also meant him.

But regardless of that, I went to go see if I could find a few friends. I was met with a beautiful woman, her long legs covered in jeans with thigh-laced-up boots and a relieving t-shirt.

It didn't click then, or later on when I was tapped on the shoulder by a taller version of the woman. He had short blonde hair, dressed like every other jock, but the immediate feeling, sense I got from him was nothing but lust.

Now it's been seven years, seven years for me to try out things with many different people, and figuring myself out along the way. I've come to the conclusion that I don't just like the men that serve me coffee in the morning, or the women that I do yoga with.

Sam's older now, just by a year his beautiful wife and his kids, live in a small starter home at the end of our quiet town. Sam's wife has always taken a liking to me. And their kiddos call me Auntie.

It all around a great part of my life to be around my family. To be around so much love and admiration for each other. But the fear of saying the truth, the fear of telling my older brother makes me worry.

Makes me worry that I'll spill the truth on a silver platter and be told I'm not worthy of that love and admiration that I crave to have, that I enjoy seeing.

Sometimes it floats around, I can see even if it for just a brief moment. I can it flutter around Sam's kids, or him and his wife the way they share just a longing happy look for each other.

"I hate to bother you two live birds, but I was wondering if I could take the kiddos out for ice cream?" I ask Sammy, he smiles and says "Sure just be careful. Love ya." I gather their two kids up and well chase each other to my car.

In moments like this, I sometimes wish I already had kids. I also wish that their uncle and grandfather could be here to see them grow and flourish into strong men and strong women.

But regardless, we listen and sing along to a special playlist that we made together. Just a thing for the three of us to enjoy. "Auntie, play our songs please!"

Sam's youngest says her politeness reminds me of him. "Yeah, Auntie you gotta play our songs and sing along with us this time!" Sams oldest screams, he looks like Sam, but in reality, has the personality and swagger of Sam's wife.

We make it to our favorite ice cream place. They always get the same things, no matter the time of the season. "You two outta try something different," I say to them, they give me a look of 'How dare you to tell me to get something different.' I giggle, and we walk out to the shop.

Getting the kiddos back, and in bed was a task. They gave their kisses to me, and then to Sam. Their mother takes them to bed, so nows it's just my brother and me. "Good night pumpkins, Auntie loves you," I say Watching the two of them holding their hands and walk down the hallway.

There's no better time to tell him.

"Hey, are you okay Y/n?" Sam asks an almost empty beer in his hand. He's sitting across from me at the dinner table. I'm in my own thoughts, I'm brought back when I feel Sam's socked foot hit the bottom of my foot.

"Yeah, you could say that I'm okay," I say back, I'm starting to worry about what he might say, maybe I shouldn't say anything.

"Look, I'm your older brother, I know when somethin' is bothering you," Sam says with a hopeful look. I frown, I might as well say the truth, that's something that Sam and I promised each other when we left Dean and John.

"Nothing is bothering me, Sammy, I just need to say something to you and I don't know how to phrase it." He puts his beer down and get's up grabbing my hand and taking me outside.

He'd always done this with me when we were younger. Dragging me to the open yard, he plopped down to the grass and drug me with him. He'd tell me when I was young, to look up in the sky and feel the earth below me. To let go of worries, and be calm be thoughtful.

"Sam, what are we doing out here? We aren't kids anymore." I said closing my eyes. "Y/n just please, do this for me. Maybe you'll figure out a way to phrase your thoughts." He said

I thought as he told me to do. It was nice to feel everything around me and not so much worry about things. "Are you better now Y/n?" Sam asked, I opened my eyes and smiled.

"A little yeah," I said, I might as well just say it, let it be in the open. Regardless of what Sam may think, or even say I'm just going to go for it. That's at least one major thing, Sammy, as taught me over the years.

"Sammy.. I've thought long and hard about telling you and even saying this out loud, but I'm bisexual," I said getting up and looking at my older brother.

He'd yet to give me a reaction, no change in his facial expression, no words yet spoken. It was just quiet, the weird unsettling silence, that gives me anxiety. Makes me worry that the sweet moment between a brother and his sister will forever be lost, that I'll never get to see my nephew and niece again.

But before I know it I'm encased in Sam's overbearing arms, he's hugging me tightly, reassuring me that he loves me, tell me that he proud of me. Everything thought that I had was wrong. He's my brother, after all, he knows me better than anyone.

"Can I ask a question, peanut?" He said, using a nickname he'd used many years ago. We were still hugging, I hummed. "Am I the first person you've officially told?" Sam asked.

I thought a minute, my partners that I'd been with hadn't really known, so yeah Sam was the first to know. "Yeah, I think you are Sammy," I said holding on tight to his hug.

"I just want you to know that I love you, and I'm always here for you peanut. Why don't you and I go out for the weekend tomorrow? Spend some quality time together?!" He asked. I smiled and hummed.

There was nothing better than being excepted and loved. Not only that but it also felt like a thousand-pound rock had been lifted from my shoulders by telling Sam.

Completed on: 06/05/2021

Posted on: 06/06/2021

Tag List: @sweetdetectivequeen @wonderfulworldofwinchester @hobby27 @fofisstilinski @doctorlilo

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boop-le-snoot · 3 years

Text

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 34

💖 first time reader click here 💖

A little bit of plot, but mostly ironstrange x reader filthy porn. Bukkake stuff. Stephen finally opening up a lil bit, I mean... I've slept through a 1/3 of a hospital and lemme tell you, doctors are kinky bastards. On the same note, there's definitely going to be a chapter where all three men are involved after the plot shit is resolved.

There was something big brewing. I had a hunch... which was more like a strong sense of doom... hanging over me and the rest of the world. Peter also had noticed the sudden spike in anxiety, quoting the sudden disappearance of many low-tier mutants from the streets. Usually, Peter dealt with at least a few enhanced enemies during his patrols but the closer it got to Christmas, the less enhanced bothered with small-time crimes, the more intense the buzzing of his Spidey sense became.

Now that my immediate lack of income wasn't a problem anymore, I set business onto that damn mercenary. I was no spy, I was no SHIELD operative but... I could be very clever.

First things first, I had to make sure I would stay alive no matter what. A subdermal tracker was a good guarantee of security and I spent many hours making one - having to keep it a secret was incredibly hard, I hated lying to my loves and I hated avoiding Wanda even more - I was constantly on the edge around the telepath, hyperfocused on keeping up the pretense of normalcy.

I wouldn't be me if I couldn't successfully pull off a whole ass façade. Unfortunately, the continued failures of the people searching left and right for the mercenary only fueled my strength for the inevitable fuck-fest that I would have to create in order to make sure my people get the peace they fucking deserve. The web of lies grew in size every damn day.

Subdermal tracker, an implant that reports directly to Friday upon activation. It hurt like a bitch - I had cut myself open, an inch wide gash on the inside of my forearm - and put it in without any anesthesia in my own bathroom, not even thinking twice before making up a lie that I had been careless in the lab and hurt myself.

An antidote to common tranquilizers, creating it gave me a headache the size of Moscow but I'd been successful; Tony assembled the whole team when he found it out, offering me a ridiculous amount of money for the formula. It was weird. SHIELD was interested, too, and I had to witness Tony and Coulson argue. Apparently, the agency wanted to recruit me and Tony was adamantly against it, totally forgetting the promise Natasha had given me. In the end, the spy and Coulson shared a quiet conversation and the man left, respectfully complimenting my skills.

I sold the formula to Stark Industries, unable to get rid of the weirdness of the situation. I had to shake hands with my own boyfriend and his ex-girlfriend... In a business setting. What. Just what. Bucky and Stephen couldn't stop laughing at the face I made all throughout that day - and Clint even went as far as to bake me a gag cake, a cartooney handshake drawn in frosting on top of it. I hit him with a spatula, Loki smiled in his direction for the first time in, like, ever. It was a trip and Tony had way too much fun with the incident.

Perhaps, turning myself into a cyborg stew wasn't the best plan that was possible to think up in a few weeks' time but I've never claimed to be exceptionally intelligent; if anything, I've always considered myself to be a moderately educated idiot. It is common knowledge that there are two halves of a whole idiot: my second half was on his way from California, having had received my very detailed e-mail about the whole cursed box fiasco and the consequences that followed. I could barely contain my excitement at the prospect of seeing uncle Eddie and his symbiote again.

Tony wasn't even half as excited; if anything, he bordered on outright hostile, bickering, and sassing everybody left and right. It could have been the situation at hand finally getting on his last nerves. It could have been his jealousy, the same that appeared every time I paid extra attention to someone that wasn't him, Bruce or Stephen. Either way, Bruce was sighing all the time now and Stephen's remarks began to fill with poison once again.

Just like the good old times, I guess. I was forced to pull a Me over and over, interrupting their petty arguments with increasingly absurd remarks. I felt like everybody was laughing at me these days, which ended in only one way it could have...

"Brat," Stephen's patience was paper-thin and, being forcefully distracted from yelling at Tony, he directed his angst at the nearest person - me. "I oughta put you over my knee. I swear to Cosmos..."

"Blah, blah, blah. Don't you ever get tired of listening to yourself talk?" I raised my eyebrows, tone deceptively calm. "You're talking too much for someone who can't even..." I didn't get to finish my sentence, suddenly finding my mouth firmly glued shut. It was magic - the sensation was pulling, but not unpleasant. Reminded me of a ball gag Tony had used on me in the early days of our relationship.

"Now, Dumbledore, hold your horses..." Tony interjected looking none-too-happy. The engineer placed a warning arm on the sorcerer's bicep, their little spat seemingly forgotten.

"What, Tony? She's been nothing but a mouthy urchin the past few days, I can't stand it anymore," They shared a meaningful look; no matter how much Tony wanted to argue, he knew Stephen was right. What he didn't know was that there probably have been a magic versus science altercation... Or worse. Humiliation was a small price to pay for some (relative) peace.

I did what I do best. I annoyed them further, throwing up a juicy middle finger to the two men and turned around with a huff, mind set on finding Loki to undo the mute ban Stephen gave me. Needless to say, I didn't make it very far.

In mere seconds, I was sandwiched between the two men, Stephen's finger delicately holding my chin to force me to look into his eyes. Tony was holding onto my shoulders from behind me - I could feel the tension, my engineer was almost buzzing with it. I was pretty sure my eyes were laughing anyway because Stephen's frown slowly transformed into a coy smirk once his stormy blues focused on my face.

"Brat," He repeated once again. "She's doing this on purpose."

"I can't say I'm surprised," Tony's breath tickled the nape of my neck. "That does sound like our little Princess," Apparently, it took all of a 0.1 second for Tony to switch from annoyed to horny. Men, they were so easy to play. "Baby, if you wanted our attention you could have just said so," He chastised me, hands sliding down to my waist.

I hummed, and then aggressively hummed some more until Stephen removed the magical gag. "Not like you'd notice it, being occupied with tearing each other's hair out," I pouted.

The sorcerer briefly averted his eyes, leaning down to softly kiss my pout. It was very unlikely I'd get an actual apology but a kiss I won't be complaining about either. "So, your best tactic was to annoy us even more? How does that work out for you?"

I pulled on the tied fabric around his waist, bringing him closer to me. "Pretty good, if I'm being honest. You're exactly where I wanted you to be," Carelessly, I began untying the layers of silks and cotton I had become intimately familiar with over the course of the past few weeks. Most of the time Steph wore his wizard garbs and while figuring out how to undo them was a trip at first, I had gotten him desperate enough a few times, for him to show me a few tips and tricks for easier access.

Tony snorted somewhere behind me. "You just want us for our bodies," His hands wormed their way under my shirt, brushing the underside of my breasts. Bra? Hardly know her. "Our beautiful, sexy bodies." Yes Tony, very humble.

"When will you learn, people?" I asked rhetorically, simultaneously leaning into both Tony's and Stephen's touch. "Why fight each other when you could be fucking me into oblivion instead?"

Stephen snorted, still not completely used to the at times crude things that left my (and occasionally Tony's) mouth. I had a hunch the sorcerer was holding back somewhat - for whatever reason - and I was eagerly waiting for him to get comfortable enough to reveal that special part of himself. Whatever it was, I just knew it was delicious and sinful and-

"Do you really think I will be giving you what you want after your little... Stunt?" Steph went balls out; his voice dropped and the intensity of his stare left me breathless. The hand that was stroking my face wrapped around my throat as he had some sort of a silent conversation with Tony.

"Yeah," I emphasized the word with an inaudible 'duh' behind it but obediently trotted along as Stephen backed up towards the couch, leading me by the throat like a pet on a leash. I was steadily going into 'no thoughts, head empty' territory.

"I like it when you get all bossy," Tony remarked casually but he was close enough for me to hear the strain in his voice. Every time we fucked, Tony eagerly gave up the control to Stephen. I definitely saw the appeal. Stephen Strange demanded authority effortlessly, his stern but fair attitude simply demanded to kneel.

That's just what I did. As soon as Stephen made himself comfortable on the Italian leather couch, I dropped to my knees, looking up at the man with big round eyes. Just like Tony and Bruce, Stephen had his own weaknesses when it came to moi and I wasn't ashamed to exploit them. Steph's stroked my hair, carding careful fingers through it, slowly unbuttoning his pants with his other hand.

"If you insist on being mouthy, I have a better task for you," He husked, pulling me closer towards him. I called it his doctor voice. Honestly, I don't have a clue how his surgical team could be around him with their pants on back in the day... The man was a snack on a silver platter.

Steph's erection sprang free. I didn't hesitate to wrap my hand around it, stroking the underside of his glans just like he liked it, looking to the side where Tony landed on the couch next to Stephen, a curious look on his face. Yeah, Tony liked to watch. Me and Stephen or me and Bruce... Me and Stephen and Bruce? That's an idea for later.

"Don't mind little old me," Tony smirked his trademark Stark mischief, getting comfortable, ditching his oil-stained shirt and unbuttoning his pants to lazily palm himself through his boxers. "Carry on," The smirk only grew when Tony noticed both me and Steph eyeing him with amusement.

I hid my grin, nodding my head, before wrapping my lips around the tip of Stephen's cock, relaxing my throat to prepare for the intrusion. Sweet and salty, the slit on his cockhead was mercilessly teased by the tip of my tongue.

Stephen murmured encouragements under his breath as I began to bob up and down, him controlling the pace with a hand in my hair, just the right balance between cruel and gentle. The sorcerer was always too good to me, bringing me to the point of overstimulation and instantly soothing the ache afterward; "Fuck, darling, your mouth feels like heaven," He groaned as I snuck a look upwards to see his lips parted and a steady flush crawling up his neck.

"She knows how to work a man, doesn't she?" Tony's lust had him panting, hips moving into his own hand. He leaned closer to Stephen, brushing my hair behind my ear with a tender hand. "Merlin needs to share," Tony began pulling me in his direction. I reluctantly let go of Stephen's cock, keeping up the pace with my hand as I scooted closer to Tony to be able to mouth at his stiff erection.

Watching me suck cock always got Tony hard enough to pound nails with. I couldn't blame him, I knew what I could do and did well; by the time I made my way down his thick flesh, drool was dripping down my chin and the make-up around my eyes was surely smeared by tears. My engineer was much less gentle than Steph, pounding my face without reservations.

"I know you can take it, baby girl, fuck," My face was held in his strong grip, thumbs digging into my jaw. "Such a good girl," The two words went straight down to my pussy and I had to squirm and clench my thighs together, whining at the lack of friction.

The air was pierced by a low moan - Stephen was fisting his erection almost desperately now, almost as desperately as I was humping the air, whining like a bitch in heat at the taste of Tony's cock in my mouth. I knew neither of the men would last long, not with all that pent up tension running through their minds and bodies.

"Fuck, come here, baby girl," The engineer yanked me off his cock, gripping the base of it so forcefully his knuckles turned white. I was all but dragged into the space between them; still kneeling, barely seeing with snot and tears smeared all over my face, I couldn't hold in the broken moan as the realization set in.

"Keep your eyes open!" Steph instructed furiously, scooting to tower over me. Tony followed in his steps as I obediently lifted my eyes to their cocks and then their faces; nearly identical furrowed brow expressions stared back at me, lips moist and eyes wide. Both men stroked themselves with renewed vigor.

I hummed softly before sticking out my tongue; their reaction didn't let me wait long. Strings of pearly white cum landed in my hair, on my face; I felt the warmth on my skin and tasted their salt and musk on the tip of my tongue, reflexively swallowing each and every drop that landed in my mouth, savoring it just like I savored the sinful groans that left their mouths.

"Fuck, you're so good to us," Tony panted, gracelessly falling backward onto the couch.

Stephen, however, didn't hurry to catch his breath, giving me a thoughtful look. His fingers shook more than ever but he paid no mind to the discomfort, gathering the cum dripping down my face with two fingers and offering it to me, holding them up to my lips as I gently cleaned them off. And he did it again, and again, until Tony gave a weak moan of recognition, throwing an arm under his head.

"Be polite, Princess," Stephen's voice hadn't lost the lust in it just yet.

"Thank you, sir," I mumbled, utterly captivated by the way he was looking at me. Stormy blues radiated a strong sense of intensity, devotion perhaps, that I wasn't ready for.

Stephen smiled at me, almost coyly, before kneeling right next to me and bringing me over the edge with a few sharp, clever movements of his hand. I held onto his shoulders for dear life, barely noticing Tony's reaction - if there was one - my other lover seemed to be as surprised as I was, choosing to hang back and observe the unusual situation.

I had a feeling that whatever it was, it would make another appearance during our playtime. It wasn't just sex, it wasn't making love - it was... Something. I loved every second of it.

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