#a skateboard? a fucking skateboard? dude?
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imagine some Gothamites pretending to be in trouble or hurt and calling for a specific bat just because they have a crush on them, but the batkids purposely mess it up by sending another bat.
they also do this because they're little shits.
[i told myself i won't make this too long, but oh well]
scenario 1:
a woman, who's not even in trouble, she mostly wants to see Nightwing's new suit because.. oh.. the new suit causes his behind to form well.
Woman: Nightwing, Nightwing! Where are you? I need help.
Robin! Tim, hops down from the tall building and mind you, his skateboard tucked under his arm: Hi, Ma'am! Sorry, Nightwing is unavailable tonight. I, Robin, will help you.
Woman, judges the skateboard before looking at Tim: Uh. Thank you, Robin, but I was specifically asking for Nightwing. Is he- he around?
Robin! Tim, cheeks red from the cold, shakes his head: No, Ma'am. Sorry.
Woman: That's... That's okay. I'll figure out my problem on my own. Thank you again, kid.
Robin! Tim nods at her way before climbing back up the building.
Nightwing appears from the darkness, laughing his ass off. Tim joins his older brother until their stomach ache from the laughing session.
--
scenerio 2:
young teenage girl with pink highlights on her hair bikes through the neighborhood and out of nowhere, just falls down on the side of the road, on the grass. but gently. purposely.
Teenager, holds her ankle: Ow, ow. Is The-The Signal around? I kind of.. Uh... Fell.
Robin, comes out from the trees and he looks even brighter than ever with the sun still out: That was kind of careless of you.
Teenager, a bit annoyed: Robin? Don't you only patrol at night? Where's The Signal?
Robin, adjusts his katana and shrugs: You'd be surprised that I happen to do this at morning too. Well. Occasionally.
Teenager, skeptical: Uhuh.
Robin just stares at her, not even answering about The Signal. it makes the teenager a bit uncomfortable.
Teenager, manages to stand: Anyways... I think I feel better now. I'll head home.
Robin, lips twitching to a smirk: Stay safe.
behind the trees, Duke and Tim giggle like little children.
Robin: I must admit.. That was quite hilarious.
--
scenario 3:
two loud men exit the bar. they've been talking about Spoiler and Black Bat inside, fangirling like teenagers about their crushes.
little did they know, Red Hood was inside that bar as well.
Man 1: Fuck, I'm too drunk. Is Spoiler there? I need help to go home.
they are not even drunk.
Man 2, hides a smile behind his hand: How about Black Bat? We poor men need some saving.
before they can even lift their mouths to laugh, Red Hood apprears from the alley, gun on his hand.
Red Hood, voice so deep from the helmet: Need a lift, boys? There's enough room for both of you on my bike.
Man 1 gulps and Man 2 nearly passes out.
Red Hood, smirks: Not the person you wanted to see, huh?
Man 1: Uh.... You are a sight to see, Red Hood. Uh, Sir.
Man 2: But no, tha-thank you.
Man 1: We can manage. Right, dude?
Man 2: Right. Of course.
Red Hood, wants to laugh so bad but he has to keep this persona first: Well, let me know if you need anything.
both men run to the other direction. one of them even trips.
Red Hood hears Steph and Cass' lively laughs through the comms.
--
scenario 4:
a young adult man steps outside his building, doesn't mind the drizzle from the Gotham sky.
Man: Shit. I forgot my keys.
Man, looks up at the building: Is Red Robin out there? I need help in finding the keys to my apartment.
there's no sign of the vigilante so the man decides to just re enter his building.
out of nowhere, a sound of someone landing behind him makes him turn around and he is faced with Black Bat, holding his keys around her gloved hand.
Man, shocked: Um.. Hey. You found- you found my keys.
Black Bat doesn't respond, just lifts the keys higher.
Man: Tha-thank you.
Black Bat nods before grappling to the darkness.
the young man feels stupid for doing what he did, which is throw his keys behind the dumpster. and he didn't even get to see Red Robin.
somewhere, Black Bat joins Spoiler and Red Robin on top of a building to share some laughs and enjoy some Batburgers.
--
scenario 5:
a couple of bestfriends, woman and man, stop by at the side of the road. they were gossiping about Red Hood's arms, modulated voice and height, saying how sexy he looks.
out of stupidity, the man stabs his switchblade on one of the wheels of his car.
Woman, nods at him before calling for help: Someone help us! We don't have a spare tire.
Man, heart beating so fast: Red Hood, can you please help us? Red Hood!
after a few minutes of longing, Nightwing, Spoiler and The Signal appear from behind their car, startling the two of them.
Nightwing, grins cheekily: Good evening.
Signal, smiles: You called for help?
Spoiler, huge smile on her face with a spare tire on her hand: Glad we saw this lying around.
it's actually a spare tire at the back of the man's car.
the woman and man exchange glances, slightly nervous.
Man, touches his chest: Oh, thank goodness.
Woman, pretends to be in relief as well: Thank God for you, guys. We appreciate it.
Signal and Spoiler help each other in putting the tire.
Nightwing, grin hasn't faded: Sorry, the Red Hood is a bit busy tonight.
Signal: Maybe try calling out for him some other time?
Spoiler: We would give his number to you, but he's kind of a private person.
both the woman and man blush, embarassment creeping on them.
by the alley, Red Hood watches the rest of the batkids, a low chuckle on his lips.
--
a bonus:
a bunch of teenagers play around under the rain, splashing mud on their clothes. one of the blonde girls call out, "Robin, come play with us!" then the rest of her playmates giggle at that. they idolize the young hero.
and who comes out of the darkness? the rest of the batkids except for Robin. they make sure that the children are able to go home and are safe.
meanwhile, Damian is at the Manor with a stuffy nose as he is sick due to playing with his pets under the rain last weekend.
#little shits#but i love them dearly#i can see them doing this to gothamites#honestly makes sense#incorrect batfam#incorrect dc#batfamily#batkids#batsiblings#dick grayson#duke thomas#stephanie brown#cassandra clare#tim drake#jason todd#damian wayne#dc comics#yel chronicles
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the chocolate guy is literally just a sculptor that uses chocolate as his medium. it's not that weird of a concept. and yet sometimes when i see one of his videos i find myself asking "what the hell possesses a person.....?"
#a skateboard? a fucking skateboard? dude?#text post#okay to reblog#i show up at the skatepark and do a (failed) sick ass flip and break my leg then start eating my skateboard wdyd
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Grandma seen carrying a skateboard for transportation.
#interesting#interesting facts#discover#thats interesting#thats insane#thats incredible#like woah#grandma#grandmas#skate#skater#skateboard#skateboarding#whatthe#gnarly#what the#what the heck#what then#what the hell#what the fuck#what the flip#what the shit#woah#woah woah woah#woahhhh#woah :0#woah dude#but woah#woahg#woah who said that
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parents be like when i was yr age i totaled my moms car coming back from a party in another state. also dont skateboard too fast the neighbor said something to me ☹️
#ITS AN ELECTRIC SKATEBOARD THE NEIGHBORS ARE JUST 600 YEARS OLD.#i dont know what impression i give off to where they think 1. my parents care or can do anything about it#and 2. they can say shit like that to me.#'this kid looks dangerous he could hurt someone or vandalize my house :(( lets piss him off' huhhh#also dude i cant physically go fast enough to crash again#like i have but that was a skill issue from like 2 years ago#also you dont think this would be a good thing but i have noise canceling headphones on all the timee#the amount of visual cues i have to take in to know my surroundings makes me safer#also hey if yr going 50 in a 35 residential street and bitching about me being dangerous.. look inwards 🤕#'now entering residential neighborhood' 'what the fuck theres residence 😧'#silly me for forgetting the only safe thing to do is study which has never harmed me at all
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thinking abt how all the exes got cool abilities but lucas lee was just some motherfucker with a skateboard and some swagger
#scott pilgrim#tech.txt#and thats all he ever needed tbh#idk why he had no like cool abilities or anything he was literally some dude with a job and skateboard bro what the fuck was he doing there
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actually hang on, there was a fangame I found years ago that combined like all the Tony Hawk games into one package... I should look that up. and download it again. and play it.
#incidentally no i was not particularly *good* at tony hawk games. i could spam my way to a high score sometimes.#i think learning the mctwist was the most advanced i got.#i would play pro skater 3 and 4 with cheats and just explore. or make my neighborhood in the Park Creator.#and thug and thug 2... were my playground. ;w;#you can get off your board... and just like... walk around!!!!#'ohhhhh!!!' you say. 'thats the kind of gamer djay is!!! i see now!!!'#yeah!!!!!#thaw was the culmination of this joy for me because you could literally throw your board away and forgo the whole skateboarding thing#and just go walking in this interconnected california... as Some Dude....#i would play through the stories just to get all the stages and then that's it. i got all i wanted. i got my playground.#come home from school. boot up thug 2. fuck around.#(by myself because i have been regularly and sporadically without friends.)#god.... yeah......#so that's what Nostalgia feels like.....
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had like 800 dreams at once last night i am feeling insane.//.
#imjustsittinghere#weird dream where i was back home skateboarding with some people#n driving really way too fast around my neighbourhood with people#n there was this weird party on a ledge where there should’ve been a bus stop in real life#with a bunch of people who were all like 10 years older versions of people i knew in high school#and some other people who i kept forgetting their names#n then i woke up cause there was a technician talking to my roommate about our washing machine#but then i went back to bed and had half this dream ive had before#idk it’s weird and i’m at this college campus place and there’s this dude who i’m buds with#n we were chilling n i was talking about a crush or something then i passed out/got possessed kinda#and i was in this weird dreamscape and there was like some mr smith agent stuff happening#and then i started realizing something was wrong or something and literally like giant halo rings n space ships started warping in the sky#n i was like oh fuck that’s not good n i snapped out of it and was half conscious in this park with people#but at the same time dreaming about kissing this dude at a new year’s eve party#then i actually woke up so uhhhh a lot going on there#probably going to delete just needed to write this somewhere cause HUH#the space ship part was weird it felt so real and looked so fucking cool like wild star nebula sky n massive space ships#anyway goodmorning
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yo, what the actual fuck. why does sanrio collab with legit almost EVERYTHING except what i really want. “ 8′DDDDD “
#i know what i really want is super niche but like#THEY COLLAB WITH THE MOST RANDOM ASS SHIT I'VE SEEN THOUGH LIKE#they had a collab with that cuck bl skateboarding anime and like A BUNCH OF DUDES THAT LOOK LIKE KIRITO???#LIKE WHO EVEN ARE THESE PEOPLE#YET THEY DON'T PULL UP WITH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#like i just found out they did golden kamuy but even before that it was like#yo what the fuck who are these binches foreals i'm#sanrio out here making a fool out of me#when i say i want them to come on over#and do a collab with the shit i like!!!!
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loser!ellie hc’s
PALESTINE, CONGO, AND SUDAN. | HELP PALESTINE
loser!ellie who claims to be a ‘skateboarding pro’ but the second you’re distracted, she bails.
“im okay, babe !”
loser!ellie who is absolutely OBSESSED with pokémon go. when she’s not clinging to you, she’s roaming around the house catching pokémon.
“fuck yeah! community day !”
“fucking stop escaping you little bitch”
loser!ellie who still doesn’t know how to take a compliment from you to save her lifeee. all she will do is shove her face into your chest and place kisses wherever she can.
loser!ellie who gets ecstatic whenever you go on a date to the comic or record store.
“can i get this? s’the one i need to finish my collection”
“oh my god they have the limited edition !”
loser!ellie who’s favorite thing to say is “nuh-uh”. you said you loved her more? you get a “nuh-uh”. you told her to go to bed ‘cause it’s late? “nuh-uh, i’m not even tired.”
you two will always have matching skins in every single game you play together. duos in fortnite? matching skins. racing in mario kart? matching skins.
loser!ellie who is the most stubborn person on earth. ‘cause why would she listen to you when she has the option to cross her arms and give you attitude?
loser!ellie who always accidentally calls you “dude” and “bro”. and when you glare at her, waiting for her to notice, she’s all clueless, wondering what she did.
“babyyyyyy what did i dooo?? tell meeee”
loser!ellie who will always find a way to bring you up in every conversation she has.
“my girlfriend loves those too !”
“send me that, i need to show my girlfriend.”
“that reminds me of when me and my girlfriend were…”
loser!ellie who will smother your faces in kisses when she doesn’t have your full attention, instead of calling your name.
pt.2
hshhrurjdj i dunno these jus remind me of her ahh lemme know if you like these im not sure ab this
#elstronomy#ellie williams#ellie the last of us#ellie tlou#loser!ellie#loser!elliewilliams#the last of us#tlou2#tlou#<3#headcanon#ellie hcs#ellie headcanons#ellie tlou2
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this is my element (+ album)
asking me to pick my fave album is like asking an orphan matron to pick her favorite baby boy
thats some weird and cruel circumstances to put upon me i feel like it changes every damn week like a rota
i mean what if my beats misbehave and i gotta put 'em in time out i cant play permanent on that theyre too cute
but yknow what i can show you one thing thats been on my mind lately
===
so when i was a kid we had this skateboard vid by "element skateboards" on DVD
they were this skateboard kit slash apparel company that was all about progressivism and shit and they did these much lauded comp tapes of dudes riding around on their boards and doing the dopest of macho tricks on the shit
flipping it turnways
putting the rock in the house like a big man
we had some of their merch actually
===
so anyways the one we had back then was This Is My Element
released 2007
mostly clips from cali i think and i mean the camerawork is fucking insane on some of those shots
this is gonna sound lame as fuck but i prob spent so many cumulative hours just peelin through the footage and ogling the shit outta it
that framing was tight
===
so you may be asking yourself or me
dave you genuine dicksucker i asked about your fav album not your favorite sordid ass display of smooth dudes hardcore riding and grinding them boards in public dude you have a problem
ok well that wasnt a question first of all so jot that down
but anyways to THAT i say
listen to the music
the whole thing has an original soundtrack of ambient beats
got some abstract hip hop jams, got some more indie stuff, lots of acoustic sampling
HELLA underground
and basically every track minus one is done by sampler beast david p. madson AKA "odd nosdam"
dude is my hero seriously
he is the master of the beat machine i shit you not hes always been kinda my idol on this stuff
aside from bro obviously
===
obviously.
===
anyways he had an E-mu SP-1200 which is a really oldschool sampler invented by dave rossum in the late 80s
revolutionary to the hip hop scene
nosdam had this mega distinct sound to his music that i always wanted to replicate on my own beats
still do
i dont know for sure if he used it on T.I.M.E. but he uses some of the same samples from "vol. 9" which was exclusively SP-1200 so im gonna get a lil j’accuzi on that
it couldve been a boss dr sampler SP-202 though idk
he had one of those
===
so aside from beating the shit out of the pause/resume button to flip my whole cranium at the cinematography or whatever i would also kinda play it on loop to listen to the soundtrack and space out at 2am
the lonely broner seemed to free his mind at night
ok shit broner is good but i didnt mean it like that
that was goofy lets just keep movin
it was the only way i had to listen to it back then but i mean the video is 50 mins long so its basically just an odd nosdam album with accompanying ambient skater sounds and random expletives and whatever
random car sequence
yknow what i dont think people respect enough?
the dude who catches all the "mad stunts yo" on camera
i swear to god at least half the time hes ALSO on a board and that shit is bananas to me
bros gotta be on some whole other level of zen to skate good AND catch all them glamor shots of his fellow skater
thats like an express ticket to the ER imo
the ambulance is already on the scene watching you like an eager crow watches a half dead dog
===
ok gonna go ahead and lay it out flat
not great on a board myself
kinda dogshit at it actually
so maybe im not exactly an arbitrator of skateboard heinousness
but i always kinda liked watching THEM do it i mean who doesnt?
whats an even crazier layer to stack on the "dave" cake is
and dirk told me this because unfortunately it kinda happened post-2009
he would do all these collabs with one of my childhood favorite underground rappers david cohn aka serengeti
surrounded by daves left and right dude even before all the time travel horseshit
thats like
serendipitous as fuck i think!
===
if sburb was just a revolving door of artists called dave that i could bump fists with
instead of other mes in various states of aliveness tending toward extremely dead
i wouldve probably given it something higher than 2 stars on my TGN review
===
so yeah you ask me my favorite album its T.I.M.E. by odd nosdam i guess
bump that shit on a walk your mind will go places unknown to man
#dave strider#homestuck#comix#this is my element#the way i drew dave posing here is rly heavily inspired by askinsufferableprick btw#welcome to strider infodump hours
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Watching Cellbit's QSMP pov is fucking wild. Cus dude just casually went from detective horror shit getting tortured and kidnapped, straight up telenovela drama with his fiancé and inlaw grandpa, back to detective horror with the federation and his past with q!Bagi, murder and cannibalism, purgatory, more murder and cannibalism but grief-flavoured, and now dude's just having an arc of skating the problems away. Stg if he's not doing angst, he's on a skateboard.
Like I'm absolutely here for it but what a character arc.
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12 from the clumsily list please babe?!
12. Becoming their partner’s physical first aid kit. they carrying everything now, alcohol swabs, band aids, adhesive tape, elastic bandages, everything.
“Steve.”
Steve knew that tone and his head swivelled instantly, searching for whatever direction you’d be coming from. He found you to his left, his hands dropping the record sleeve Eddie had been showing him onto the sofa, just in time for you to drape yourself over his shoulder.
“What’ve you done?” He asked suspiciously, his hands catching yours so he could inspect your palms, your fingers. There was no blood, no cuts. “What d’you do?”
Eddie snorted when you huffed and he tutted as Steve continued to inspect your arms. “She’s not made of glass dude, leave her alone—”
His sentence was cut off when Steve tugged you forward and onto his lap, the gash on your knee bleeding ruby on show, a trail of red running down your shin and dangerously close to your white sneakers.
Eddie grimaced, perplexed. “What the fuck, dude?”
Steve made a noise of triumph and you had the audacity to look both sheepish and bothered by his win, your arms crossed as you leaned back into the sofa. “Turns out, I can’t skateboard anymore.”
Steve really did laugh then, already fishing in his front pocket and he pulled out some change, one of your hair ties and a few bandaids. He undid the backing with his teeth, his hands busy swiping the drying blood from your leg, frowning when you hissed in pain, murmuring his apologies with a soft hush. His touch was soothing, a pain relief like no other, gentle and kind and tenderly careful.
You weren’t made of glass, no, despite the way you seemed to break so easily. But Steve, treated you like spun sugar, like something finer and more precious than anything else.
“Baby, I dunno if you were ever able to skateboard at all,” he reminded you gently. “Thought we swore off things w’wheels, huh?”
You grumbled in response, no words, just morose agreement. You had agreed to those terms, especially after the roller skating incident with Dustin and the three day stint you had as the florists delivery service.
Bikes weren’t your thing either.
But Steve was gently placing a bright orange bandaid over your wound, tiny dinosaurs staring back. You hummed when Steve ran gentle fingertips over it, making sure it was stuck to your skin properly. “You’re gonna have to clean yourself up,” Steve was murmuring, almost forgetting Eddie was still beside him. “You’re gonna get blood everywhere, babe.”
“I will,” you replied just as softly. “Thanks, handsome.”
And then like every other time, you leaned in, waiting. Steve was all pink affection, fondness in his eyes and a blush on his cheeks as Eddie held back a laugh, but he kissed your cheek regardless, chasing the corner of your mouth just as you pulled away, grinning.
“My hero,” you cooed, only to make him pinker still, his cheeks rosy as he glared at you, leaving him for Eddie to make fun of.
#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington imagine#Steve Harrington fanfic#Steve Harrington fanfiction#Steve Harrington oneshot#Steve baby blurb
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some CHB headcanons
every cabin has LEDs around the inside, but there’s a constant battle over what color they are
Percy has his rippling back and forth from teal to blue and it looks like light dancing through water all over his walls and floor
the Apollo cabin can usually settle for orange and yellow as a common ground
the Aphrodite kids have a different color for each time of day and sleep with pink on the lowest brightness setting
the Hermes cabin has like ten different strips and they’re all constantly shifting
Demeter cabin’s shifts with the seasons
ANYWAYS MOVING AWAY FROM THE LEDS
they have movie nights, which I will talk about in a different post
before everybody goes back to school, the Aphrodite and Hecate cabins have a massive salon at the end of the summer with new haircuts and magic hair dye and outfit recommendations and fake but enchanted sturdy nails and a whole bunch of other stuff and basically it’s a week straight of spilling hot tea between everyone in camp
if someone asks where a camper got their hair done when they get back to school they just go “oh, um… summer camp.” and their friends will snort and be like bro isn’t summer camp the opposite of a makeover?? but they get no argument, just a shrug and a half smile
when I tell you pride month over there is a fucking riot
because Mr. D is in on it, right?? because he’s the god of gender?? and Chiron is aroace and has been raising dumbass gay heroes for literal centuries?? PLUS the sheer fucking amount of queer peeps up in there?? dude yeah
cabins competing for who shows the most pride
Demeter’s roof is covered in rainbow flowers
Hecate’s is enchanted to emit actual light in whatever flag colors of whoever uses the front door, even when they’re straight (it’s just a rainbow)
Percy collects a bunch of shed scales from the hippocampi at the bottom of the lake and then puts them all over his cabin
I could make a whole post about CHB pride but
every single Apollo kid is also a theater kid fight me
Rachel Elizabeth Dare painted a skateboard for Percy’s birthday and he brings it everywhere now, it even sits in his backpack at school
Leo, Annabeth, Percy, and Piper fucking love horror movies. Frank, Hazel, and Jason fucking hate them. They watch through their fingers, if at all
Piper loves the band Surfaces with all her heart, but she also is a die hard Green Day and P!ATD fan
Jake Mason is covered in burn scars up to his neck, just like Deadpool, just not bald lol
Hephaestus and Apollo kids faintly radiate warmth (like more so than a normal person)
the Stolls sometimes stay at camp year-round because their mom is off on international missions that are too high-risk for them to help with
the seven are AVID Smash Bros players
really everyone but
not as many people go to the Athena campers for help with homework as you might think, but whenever anyone does, they’re happy to help
the sun chariot blasts music at a frequency only the Apollo kids can hear, so their life kind of has a shitty soundtrack that consists of a mix of Broadway, Queen, modern stuff, and random bits of Beethoven every now and then
the Romans swear on few occasions
the Greeks know when to swear and when to be polite
the Valhalla peeps swear unbridled and all the time
the Egyptians never swear (in English)
for the longest time, Will Solace thinks the only gift from his dad is his healing prowess— which is obviously great, but he expresses being upset over the fact that he’s not very good at archery
well, considering this is the dumbass who didn’t bring a weapon to actual fucking Tartarus, Nico drags him to the weapon shack thing immediately afterwards and made him pick something out
he's immediately drawn to the Celestial Bronze shotgun.
Nico’s just like “what in the redneck shit did you just pick up” and Will jokingly aims it at his chest and grins and says “you know I’m from Texas, right?”
that’s how they find out Will is one of the damn best marksmen in Greek demigod history
some of the Disney nerds in the Apollo cabin sing What Once Was Mine to the little ones who need bandaids for knee scrapes and give them lollipops afterwards
Percy Jackson absolutely used to make poverty and struggle meal jokes all the time, but he got weird and concerned looks for it at CHB, so he kind of just stopped. But one day, aboard the Argo II, the PERFECT opportunity came up and he just HAD TO and as per usual— everyone else looked at him like he’s crazy— but Leo laughed so hard chocolate milk came out of his nose and that’s the story of how the two of them became Best Friends
#anyways idk what came over me#riordanverse#percy jackson#leo valdez#jason grace#Annabeth Chase#hazel levesque#frank zhang#piper mclean#Will Solace#nico di angelo#solangelo#valgrace#Jake Mason#connor stoll
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(part 3 of November Paramedic; part 2 is here.)
When Gareth mentioned a plan to locate Eddie’s paramedic in shining armor, Eddie assumed it'd be him getting into various accidents all over Indianapolis. It's something the little shit would've found funny, okay! But, Gareth's plan is much less hazardous and slightly more logical: lurk around the university until they spot him. Like a pair of drug dealers trying to tempt the goody-two-shoes protagonist into addiction and sin on an 80s Saturday morning cartoon.
It's not the simplest task since they don't know when Steve might be there. Also, other responsibilities mean they can only spare so many hours loitering. So, thirteen days post-hatching plan and nineteen days post-meeting Steve (not that Eddie's been counting or anything), with nothing to show for their ethically questionable behavior, Eddie is ready to give up. Especially since both of them have a rare simultaneous day off. Usually, those are spent jamming, smoking, playing D&D… literally anything other than this.
"This is fucking stupid," he says, cigarette clenched between his teeth. "We're not gonna run into him."
"Sure we are," Gareth says. He drops his butt among the dozens they've chain-smoked and lights another without meeting Eddie's gaze. "We're getting closer. I can feel it."
"The only thing you're feeling is delusional. It's time to give up."
"Eddie, c'mon-"
"Nope." One last drag and Eddie stomps out his cig. "Fuck this; I'm out."
He stalks toward his van at the far end of the parking lot. Gareth curses before running after him.
"Dude!" he exclaims, jogging to keep up with Eddie's longer strides. "You can't just give up! What about what you said-"
"I was being stupid. What was I even imagining? We orchestrate another meeting and, what, I use my freakish wiles and seduce him? And then we'll live happily ever after…" Eddie shakes his head. "It doesn't work like that. He'd probably turn out to be a douche anyhow."
"No, listen!" Gareth seizes Eddie's arm and yanks him to a stop in the middle of the lot. "You always do this. Self-sabotage and cut things short, even when there's potential."
Eddie scoffs. "You know what else always happens? I end up liking them more than they like me. It's not fun."
"You don't know it'll be like that this time. You have to try."
"No."
Eddie takes a step back. He's done; he's out. Gareth reaches for his wrist to pull him back in. He jerks away, almost losing his footing and stumbling into the burgundy car behind him. Gareth's arms shoot out to help, but Eddie steadies himself before crashing. For a second, silence reigns as they assure everyone's on solid ground. Then Eddie opens his mouth to once and for all-
"Eddie? Gareth?"
Their heads snap to the side, eyes landing on… Max? Looking unusually dressy in high-waisted shorts and a fitted top under an oversized jacket, and her hair in a high ponytail. She's got her skateboard under her arm, a messenger bag with a textbook sticking out, and a confused furrow between her eyebrows.
"What are you doing here?" she asks.
Fuck. They can't tell her the truth – she'll never let him live it down. Fortunately, Gareth realizes this too, because he says:
"Uh, I go to school here? What are you doing here? The math building is way over there."
She rolls her eyes and leans on the burgundy car. It's a shiny BMW M5 – the limited anniversary edition. Jesus fucking Christ, Eddie almost dented that thing! It's worth more than his life. And Max is slouching against it like it's nothing. He could warn her not to scratch it, but she's unlikely to care; she's always been metal that way.
"Waiting for my friends," she says. "We have dinner on Tuesdays."
Eddie's ears ignite. Dinner? With friends? While wearing what's basically a date outfit?
"Ooohhh…" he says, sharing a grin with Gareth. "And do these friends include someone special?"
She shrugs, looking anywhere but at him. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"C'mon, Red! You're killing me! I need to know if he's good enough for you."
His fingers hover over her ponytail, as if to tug at it. She slaps his hand away.
"You're annoying."
He laughs. This terrible day just became infinitely better. He won't rest until he gets what he wants – or until she punches him, which'll probably come first. He's about to tell her so when a voice calls her name. Both turn to look, and…
It's a boy Max's age. He's beaming and waving, quickening his steps toward her. She smiles too, almost shyly, as she waves back. It's the perfect opportunity for teasing, if Eddie's day hadn't just become infinitely better.
His tongue is heavy, his skin is itching, his heart is bruising his ribs from the inside. Sweat is gathering in his pits and it's getting a little hard to breathe. Because walking half a pace behind the boy, carrying a huge duffel with such ease it might actually be stuffed with feathers, is… is…
"Yesssss!" Gareth hisses next to him. He may also be fist-pumping. Eddie isn't looking.
"Hey!" The boy stops in front of Max. "Sorry, practice ran late."
"It's okay," she says, cooler than ice, though her eyes are glittering. "I just got here."
She says something else, or maybe the boy does? It's all background noise, because Steve has caught up. Steve, in jeans and a polo that must've been tailored to his exact measurements because oooooooooohhhh boy. Steve, unshouldering the bag, muscles shifting and straining under his shirt with the movement. Steve, smiling, his golden eyes flying over Eddie.
"Hey! Eddie and Gareth, right?"
Eddie draws a sharp breath. He remembers!
"Y-Yeah!" he squeaks, hands fluttering to either wave or shake hands, ultimately doing neither. "Hi! You're here!"
"I am," Steve says, casual, as if inane conversations with former patients happen on the regular.
(It better not – Eddie doesn't do well in competitive settings.)
Max, keen eyes darting between them, asks, "You know each other?"
"Met at work," Steve says. "Or, I was working and he…"
"Ah." Max taps her temple. "That."
"How do you know them?" the boy asks her.
She points at Eddie. "Neighbor. And that's the guy who dumpster dives outside our apartment building."
Gareth flips her off. Eddie would laugh, but he's busy pretending he doesn't know what Steve looks like shirtless. It's hard (pun slowly growing more relevant) – his gaze keeps dropping to the polo's undone top button. Steve is just as gorgeous out of uniform, and now Eddie's thighs are tingling with want. He could stare at him forever…
Unfortunately, 'forever' is cut short by a woman arriving in a flurry. Wait, no. 'Flurry' implies some sort of graceful whimsy, while this person… she's a hurricane crashing into a house.
"Sorry I'm late! Nielsen wouldn't stop talking and got angry when people started leaving because it's an important lecture so this girl called him out for not keeping time because he goes on all these tangents and he said they're interesting tidbits and she said it's disrespecting our time and-" She pauses for breath. "You don't care, do you?"
Max, Steve, and the boy shake their heads.
"Right. Sorry." The woman turns to Eddie and Gareth. "Hi! I'm Robin. And you are?"
"My neighbor and his friend. Steve treated his concussion," Max rattles off, glaring at them. "You didn't answer my question: why are you here?"
Gareth frowns. "I told you," he says, pointing at the building. "School." He points at himself. "Student."
Max glares harder. "You don't have class on Tuesdays. And Eddie doesn't go here at all."
"I had stuff I needed to drop off."
"Is tagging along a crime? Jesus."
Max doesn't reply, though her glare remains.
Robin hums. "Okay, so this is super-enjoyable, I love just standing around, but I'm starving, so…" She looks at Steve, who nods.
"Yeah, we're going," he says, but neither moves. He glances at Eddie, which makes her glance at Eddie, and then they make a series of eyebrow-movements at each other, ending in a shared smile. Steve asks, "Have you guys eaten yet?"
Eddie shakes his head, pulse racing. Is this going where he thinks it is?
"D'you wanna come with? There's this diner we like…"
Holyshityesitis!
"Yeah!" Fuck, too eager. "I mean, uh, sure, sounds good."
"Cool." Grinning, Steve clicks a remote car key; the burgundy BMW beeps. What the fuck? How high is a paramedic's salary?! "Did you drive here?"
"I, uh…" Eddie falters. Shit, wasn't he supposed to? It's been three weeks and he feels fine – he thought he was in the green!
"Nope! I did!" Gareth says, 'proving' it by hauling his house keys from his pocket and jingling them.
Steve nods. "Should be safe for you to drive again, but the less strain you put on your brain, the better. Even a mild concussion isn't anything to sneeze at."
"Y-Yeah, I've been taking it easy. Basically done nothing. Until now."
Max snorts. Eddie is going to pour coffee through her mail slot.
They decide Eddie and Gareth will follow Steve's car to the diner, since Steve can't fit all of them (the real reason he asked if they drove here, duh). It's good because Eddie gets the chance to panic/gush/collect himself in the privacy of his van. It's bad because Gareth drives, lest their fib be revealed. Gareth spends the ten-minute journey gloating about driving Eddie's beloved girl, interspersed with 'I told you so!'s.
The diner is cozy, all wooden furniture and sepia photographs on the walls. A graying waitress who smells like tobacco directs them to a booth and takes their orders. An awkward silence then falls as they wait for someone to speak.
The boy clears his throat. "My name is Lucas, by the way. I don't think I said." After shaking his hand and introducing themselves, Lucas says to Eddie, "I think Max has mentioned you."
"Oh yeah? I've been dying for her to mention y- Ow!"
Eddie rubs where Max kicked his shin. Her glare is murderous. Lucas is blushing happily, though.
"So, what d'you guys do?" Robin asks.
Right. Time to small-talk like adults. Eddie gets his job as a mechanic out of the way, then gives the word to Gareth, who tells them he's a creative writing major. Robin turns out to be getting a masters in linguistics and Lucas studies biology.
"I don't actually know what I want to do, but biology feels broad enough to give me options, y'know? I can go to med school, or forensics, or, I don't know, paleontology?" he says. Max glows brighter with every word that comes out of his mouth. Cute.
This then segues into talking about their friends, who by the sound of it lead incredibly interesting lives.
"Dustin's at MIT, Mike's at Oxford, Will's in San Francisco…" Lucas says, counting on his fingers.
Max interjects, "El's in Africa building houses and teaching kids English."
"Erica is still at home, finishing high school and drowning in early acceptance letters to, like, every Ivy League there is," Steve says with a look of pure pride.
"Nancy and Jonathan – they're our age – are chasing scoops in Afghanistan… " Robin says.
"... and Argyle is also in California," Lucas finishes.
Eddie whistles. "And here we are, still in Indianapolis."
"Dude, I'm surprised I got this far," Steve says. "Wouldn't've managed without her."
He jerks a thumb in Robin's direction, who preens at the acknowledgment. Robin's cool, Eddie decides. Garrulous but fun and nice… and verrrrrrrrry close to Steve. The kind of close where they're always in each other's space. Where they wordlessly transfer food between their plates. Where Steve unceremoniously wipes a speck of ketchup off Robin's chin after she repeatedly fails to get it. They're comfortable, but not necessarily romantically affectionate. Like they're siblings rather than lovers.
(Dear God, if you are in heaven, let them be siblings.)
Conversation flows. They joke around, tell stories, swap opinions. Robin gets passionate about tonal shifts when stage shows are adapted to film, and Eddie tries not to stare at Steve's mouth as he eats. And then, once their plates are cleaned and they're waiting for dessert, Gareth leans his elbows on the table and fixes Steve with a purposeful look.
"I figured out where I've seen you before."
Eddie stiffens.
Steve blinks. "At campus, right?"
"Thought so, but no. I realized it's actually…" Gareth chuckles. "It's ridiculous, but uh, my mom had this calendar…"
Steve recoils, red flooding his face. Robin, Lucas, and Max shriek in delight, Robin grabbing Steve's arm and shaking it as he hides behind his hands.
"And my mom," Gareth says between bursts of laughter, "she's shameless, all right? She kept it in our kitchen. So during, what was it, November?"
"November," Steve confirms, muffled.
"For 30 days, if I wanted to check the date or make a notation… I saw you."
Tears stream down Robin's face, she's laughing so hard. She and Max have started chanting 'Slut! Slut! Slut!' at the still crimson Steve.
"You don't understand," Lucas says, gesturing for emphasis. "We've been waiting for someone to come up and say 'hey, weren't you…?' for years. Thank you so much!"
"Hey, thank my mom," Gareth says. Eddie's quite stunned he'd throw his own mother under the bus like that. She's a really nice person, too!
"Makes sense," Max says. "Moms love Steve."
"All parents do," Lucas says.
Cackling, Robin pinches Steve's cheek. "Gotta hide your mom and your dad around Steve!"
Steve bats her off, flushed but smiling. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. You got your wish, now shut it."
That only makes the three restart the chant to ridicule him for his harlotry. Steve's indignant squawk that 'it was for charity!' merely has everyone laugh more.
And Eddie? Well. As he sits beholding this man who works as a paramedic and drives a luxury car, who models for charity and allows his friends to mock him for it, who blushes and giggles when they lovingly call him a whore…
All Eddie can think is that he's in fucking trouble.
Afterward, it only makes sense for Eddie to drive Max home. Steve shakes his hand outside the diner, saying it was nice to see him again. Eddie, not knowing how to ask for Steve's contact info without seeming weird, agrees. He waits until the BMW drives off, then tells Gareth to get the fuck out of his seat. Gareth relocates to the backseat, whining since Max already called shotgun.
The initial minutes, they're quiet. Then Max turns to Gareth and says:
"When were you telling me Eddie is your mom?"
"Huh?"
"You said you knew about the calendar because of your mom. But that's not true."
The warmth drains from Eddie's face; his knuckles crack around the steering wheel. Gareth's expression is the epitome of 'oh shit' when he meets Eddie's gaze in the rear-view mirror.
"Yes, it is," Gareth says.
"It's not," Max says.
"It is!"
"It's not! The calendar was for 2021, and in November '21 you were a freshman and had already moved into the dorms! If your mom kept it in her kitchen, you wouldn't have seen it!"
She scowls at Gareth, mouth pinched and eyes flashing, daring him to contradict her.
Gareth swallows thickly. "It… wasn't for 2021."
"Yes, it was."
"How do you know?"
She puts her hands in her lap and lifts her chin, almost primly. Eddie gasps as the penny drops.
Gareth screams, "WHAT!"
"You have it?" Eddie cries. "Why do you have it?"
She scoffs. "You know why – you've seen his pecs."
"I don't- Okay, how're you so sure it's me?"
"Because you spent all of dinner looking like you wanted to crawl inside his mouth and live there." Her nose wrinkles. "At least I hope it was his mouth you want to crawl into-"
She's cut off by Gareth shouting "I can't hear you! Lalalalalalala-"
Eddie crumples in his seat. He's depleted of blood, air, life, everything. Behind, Gareth is grilling Max for information: are Steve and Robin together? Is Steve single? Is he queer?
Max replies: no, yes, and 'that's not for me to tell, moron'.
Gareth nods, satisfied. "That means he is. If he was straight, you'd say so." He slaps Eddie's arm. "You got a shot, man!"
"You… don't know that…" Eddie wheezes.
Max tuts, shaking her head. "You actually want to hit on my chauffeur."
"He prefers the term 'seduce'," Gareth says.
Eddie smacks his face into the steering wheel at the next red light.
------------------------------
Tag list: @rougenancy, @raisedbylibrarians, @yourebuckingkiddingme, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @emma77645, @goodolefashionedloverboi, @eddielives1986, @stevesbipanic, @the-redthread, @fandemonium-takes-its-toll, @henderdads, @gay-little-bitch, @lordofthepointygerbils, @lenore1232, @imzadidragonfly, @zerokrox-blog, @eddiemunsonswife, @cherrycolas-things, @ediewentmissing, @princess-eddie, @atombombbibunny, @ajamlessbaby, @dogswithforks, @grimmfitzz, @cutiecusp, @cuips-not-cute, @manicallydepressedrobot, @messrs-weasley, @madaboutmunson, @mightbeasleep, @suikatto, @brassreign, @snapshotmaestro, @bea-sayan, @courtjestermunson, @csinnamon-fox, @steveisabicon, @spectrum-spectre, @spinmewriteround, @just-super-fucking-gay, @escapingthereality, @oneweirdcryptid, @deehellcat, @misticageri, @lovelyscot, @olivethenerd16, @linkydinky06, @rynnytintin, @anything-thats-rock-and-roll,
I won't be adding more to the tag list because there are already so many of you. Instead, I'll be tagging the four remaining parts (it'll definitely be seven in total, btw) as #steddie fic: november paramedic. Hopefully, they'll show up in the tags and you'll see them that way.
Thank you for reading 🖤
Part 4
#the entire conversation in the van - and the purpose of max's role - came to me late at night#and i was so excited i could barely sleep afterward#everything fell into place after that#steddie fic: november paramedic#steddie#steddie fanfic#stranger things#stranger things fanfiction#eddie munson#steve harrington#gareth stranger things#max mayfield#my writing#ok so about the car:#(first off i want to admit i know nothing about cars)#in the show steve drives a bmw 733i. the car is gorgeous imo. however while luxurious at the time it's not expensive today.#so i looked up modern luxury cars and found the 30 jahre m5 - the limited edition from when bmw m5 celebrated 30yrs in 2014#only 300 got made and only 30 were sold in the us. they were as you might imagine expensive.#so the story here is that steve got one for his 16th birthday (would've been in 2015 in this fic)#probably from a doting grandparent since i doubt his parents would've given something so expensive to a teen#fun fact: every 30 jahre m5 is colored 'frozen dark silver' (gray. they're fucking gray.)#but since it's NOT steve's car if it's not burgundy and since i've already erased covid's existence... i don't think this change matters
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Surgeries and Surprises - Alex Morgan x Reader
Summary: "Skater!R gets injured", "Skater!R skates in XGames", "IDK but more Skater!R"
A/n: Look, I finally wrote a thing you guys! From multiple request for more Skater!R
Despite popular belief, skateboarding is an incredibly multifaceted activity.
There are so many different disciplines: street, vert, park, freestyle, downhill (and its variation street luge), and cruising.
For the first four, there are different competitions that skaters can compete in if they are so inclined. And in all honesty, you are usually not inclined to compete, preferring the unpredictable nature of actual street skating to the polished finish of comps like Street League, XGames, and Dew Tour.
But the chance to be one of the first skateboarders to compete in the Olympics.
Well, that’s not really something you can pass up on.
Which is why you’re skating in your 5th comp of the summer.
Not the worst schedule but you’re an idiot and made the choice to also try and get clips for your next video parts in your very limited free time.
Free time, that was only made more limited by the way you were constantly flying back and forth to France to support your wife in the World Cup.
All of this is to say that your body is currently going through it.
And, unluckily, it’ll keep going through it because XGames comps are not set up in a way that plays to your strengths, with only three 45 seconds runs to string together a line and show the judges what you can do.
Luckily, on the other hand, your flight out of Minneapolis is booked for immediately after the contest ends.
Your first two timed runs went pretty well but you know you can do better which is why you saved your best stuff for your final run.
And for the most part, your final run goes pretty well until you get to your last trick with 10 seconds remaining.
You had planned it out perfectly so that you had enough time to take a breath before giving it a go. A necessary precaution for a trick you're familiar with but not a master at, a frontside flip noseslide to fakie, especially since you’re trying it down the biggest obstacle, the 4-block rail.
A little homage to Reynolds, something you’ve been doing throughout the contest season.
Except there are a couple of problems.
The first is that, unlike Reynolds, you are not a master of the frontside flip.
The other is that after a long day of being skated by just about everyone, the rail had picked up the wax from everyone’s boards, making it slicker than you need it to be for your noseslide.
Which is why you aren’t very surprised when you hit the ground. The only surprising thing is how much it hurts.
You immediately roll over and begin to stand up and take a few steps, only to drop to one knee after barely making it anywhere.
As you try to gather the strength to stand again, you’re stopped by someone placing a hand on your shoulder.
“Stay down, Y/N/N.” It’s Reynolds. “You just used your head as a basketball and your arm is fucked. They’re bringing out a stretcher.”
“I’m fine,” you say, trying to get up again. “I don’t need a stretcher.”
His hand gets firmer and you feel him pushing you to sit down properly.
“I’m serious, Y/N, I’m serious,” he says. “I’m telling you this as your friend, not as your boss. You need to go to the hospital, your shit is fucked.”
It’s at this moment that you realize how quiet the arena is.
It’s almost as if you can hear the individualized breaths of everyone in the building and honestly, it's making your head pound in a way that you wish you weren’t familiar with.
Then you see the EmTs rolling the stretcher towards you.
“Fuck dude,” you groan, resigning yourself to your fate. “Just don’t call Alex, man, she’s gonna freak out.”
“It’s too late, she already texted me she’s trying to get on the next flight out.”
“Shit.”
The entire process of letting the EMTs do their jobs is a hassle because it’s painfully obvious that they don’t deal with skateboarders often. And it takes a lot of convincing for you to even let them strap you to the backboard.
Your memory blurs out a bit after that.
The only thing you really remember besides waking up in the hospital is telling Reynolds to make sure that they don’t give you anything stronger than a Tylenol (that didn’t happen).
When you regain consciousness it’s to the sound of voices, two you recognize and one you don’t.
“She should be coming out of the anesthesia soon,” the recognizable voice says, a doctor maybe. “In addition to her mild concussion, there were some moderate tears to her deltoid that were repaired in surgery. Unfortunately, there’s not much we can do about the fractures to the humeral head as we can’t cast the area.”
“She’s not going to like the sound of that,” you hear Alex say, “Not going to like that at all.”
“Unfortunately, whether she likes it or not doesn’t really matter. She needs to be in the sling for a few weeks at least,” the doctor says.
“Alright, thanks doc,” Reynolds' loud voice makes the headache you forgot you had worse. “Don’t worry Alex, she’s been through worse. Besides, the medal will make her feel better.”
“Not now Andrew.”
The door to your room opens a tiny bit and through squinted eyes, you watch as both your wife and mentor slip through the crack, closing the door behind them.
When they get close enough that you can make out the details on their faces, you stick your hand out to Alex and attempt to pull her into the hospital bed with you.
She doesn’t let you though and instead releases your hand to pull the only chair closer to the bed.
“Not so fast, hotshot,” she says, keeping her voice low.
“I told Andrew to tell you that you didn’t need to come all the way out here. You should be at home resting,” you tell her.
“And I told him that I was already on my way to the airport.”
“And I told you,” Reynolds says, frowning at you, “that I wasn’t going to risk having your wife mad at me.”
You roll your eyes at him.
“Now here’s your medal, silver’s not too bad considering you knocked yourself out,” he says, placing the item on the edge of the bed. “I’ll see you around bro.”
Both you and Alex watch as he quickly exits the room, moving sort of like his ass is on fire, and leaving the two of you alone.
The second the door fully shuts behind him you turn back to Alex and see more than her sigh deeply.
“How do you feel…”
“Why weren’t you…”
You both try to speak at the same time.
“No, you go ahead,” you tell her.
“Well, first of all, were you just about to ask how I’m feeling while you are literally laying in a hospital bed,” she asks.
You shrug somewhat sheepishly and say, “I mean you just flew halfway across the country and I know you haven’t been feeling the best lately.”
“Y/N/N, you’re ridiculous.”
“Anyway,” she says, rolling her eyes at you, “Why weren’t you wearing a helmet? You can only smash your head so many times before the damage is irreversible and I don’t like constantly being called to hospitals wondering if this time is the one.”
You take a second to let her words sink in.
She’s right.
Ever since the two of you reconnected and subsequently got together roughly 4 years ago, you’ve been injured quite a bit.
This is your 3rd concussion and 4th broken. You’ve also ruptured your achilles, cracked a few ribs, had one of your lungs collapse, and gotten over 50 stitches from various gashes gained from getting cut open skating some sketchy spots.
That’s not even counting the smaller ones that you haven’t told her about, like when you sprained your ankle visiting her during the Rio Olympics.
But admitting that Alex is right has never been something you’re great at.
So instead you just scoot over in the bed and ask her to lay down with you again.
It takes a bit of pleading but you do get her to join you and when she does, you’re quick to wiggle around into a position that's comfortable but still allows you to hold her.
With the knowledge that your current position makes it impossible for her to see your face, you can’t help but crack a joke.
“C'mon, babe, you know that helmets are for hills and hills only,” you say, finally answering her question, only to immediately recoil as she pinches you. “Okay, I’m sorry. I know I really freaked you out today and I hate that I keep forcing you to come see me in hospitals. And I…” she cuts you off.
“You’re not forcing me to do anything,” she protests, keeping her voice light. “I love you even though you seem dead set on destroying your body.”
“It’s not really on purpose,” you say, pulling her impossibly closer. “I don’t know how to explain it but sometimes when I skate it’s like an out-of-body experience. Nothing matters except how good it’s gonna feel when I roll away. I can barely even think straight when I’m on my board but that obviously means I don’t think about how my choices affect others and that’s not fair to you.”
When you finish speaking, the first thing you hear from your wife is a sigh that can only be described as annoyed.
“What,” you ask.
“You’re an idiot,” she says.”
“Babe,” your voice is indignant, and too loud even to your own ears.
“I’m sorry but you’re so dumb,” she says. “I’m not concerned because of how it affects me, I care about how it affects you. You’ve been acting strangely all summer and I don’t really want to see where this path takes you.”
Once again Alex is right.
And her pointing out your recent odd behavior, something you hadn’t noticed yourself, is like a bucket of ice water over your head.
Taking a deep breath, you nod even though she can’t see you and say, “I think I need to call my sponsor.”
“That sounds like a good idea.”
Unfortunately, between your concussion and having to travel back to Orlando, the call to your sponsor had to wait a few days.
And in those few days, you begin to really notice the behaviors Alex had mentioned.
Even before your injury, you were stressed and anxious but you had ignored it, believing it was tied to the comps and upcoming deadlines.
But now with those things mostly out of the way, the intensity of these feelings is familiar and you aren’t very fond of the places you ended up the last few times you felt like this.
And the isolation of being trapped at home, unable to do much more than stare at the walls and wait for Alex to get back from training, only made those feelings stronger.
When you’re finally able to make that call and the first words finally come out of your mouth, it’s as though the weight of the world comes off your shoulders.
Recovery isn’t an instant process but you do instantly feel a little better as you explain your recent behaviors that you now recognize as somewhat erratic.
And when the call ends, you have a list of dates, times, and locations so you can go to a meeting whenever you need to.
The only thing that's really left for you to do is talk to your wife when she gets home but that might be the hardest part.
So you wait, completing as many boring household tasks as you can to make the time pass more quickly.
It doesn’t really work that well because you only have one arm to work with. And you're just unlucky enough that it's your dominant hand out of commission.
You’re in the middle of unloading the dishwasher when you hear the front door open and shut.
It doesn’t take long for Alex to find you and in the back of your mind, you know that the only reason she didn’t shout your name across the house like she normally does is because of your lingering headache.
“Hey babe,” you hear her greet as you bend over to place a pot in its designated cabinet.
“Hi,” you respond, standing back up and turning to face her, only to see that she’s already taken a seat at the island. “Oh, that’s the serious conversation chair,” you note, going to lean on the counter opposite her.
“I mean it is serious but it’s nothing bad.”
“If it’s nothing bad, do you mind if I go first,” you ask, “Mine isn’t bad either but I finally got around to giving Noah a call.”
When you say that it's almost as though you can feel the energy in the room shift.
“How did that go?”
“It definitely went.”
“Are you going to elaborate or…”
Sighing deeply, you shuffle your feet, focusing on the way your socks slip over the tile.
“Apparently, when you’re really stressed and overly tired your brain chemistry changes,” you tell her, now looking up at the ceiling. “Which makes people look for things to relieve the stress, which can be a bad thing for addicts. And between the video parts, qualifiers, and flying all over the place, I haven’t actually had a chance to sit down and think, much less attend a meeting. But now, when I would’ve had a chance to, I can barely be in a room with lights on for more than 15 minutes.”
There’s a moment of silence before Alex responds and as it passes, you can feel your heart sink further and further into your stomach. This is the moment that she finally decides that being with you is far more work than it's worth.
Your downward spiral is broken by the sound of her voice.
“I guess that means that we have to come up with ways for you to handle stress when you're busy,” Alex says, “because you’re only about to get busier.”
“What? No, I’m not, the next two competitions are at the end of the month and I literally can’t skate for the next month and a half.”
“3 months,” she shoots back, “and yes you will.”
“You’re not making any sense Alex.”
Alex gets up from her seat and makes her way toward you. Before you know it, she’s reaching out for your good hand, which to this point has had a death grip on the counter behind you, not that you’ve noticed.
With a confused look on your face, you watch as she pulls your hand to rest against her stomach before covering it with both of her own.
Still confused, it takes you longer than you’d like to admit to figure out why she would do that.
It’s only when you remember the seemingly never-ending nausea Alex has been dealing with that you connect the dots.
“Oh shit.”
#uswnt fanfic#uswnt imagine#uswnt x reader#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso x reader#alex morgan x reader#alex morgan imagine#alex morgan
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OMG I LOVED UR STAN AND KYLE BSF HEADCANNONS!! Can i req one with the main four, like what its like to be in a group w/ them?? have an amazing day <33
BEING IN A FRIEND GROUP WITH SOUTH PARKS MAIN 4
pairings; stan, kyle, kenny, cartman x fem!reader (all aged up 18+)
summary; chaotic friend group hc's!
warnings; cussing
a/n; hi and ty hope you have an amazing day too!!
key colors; blue= stan green= kyle orange= kenny red= cartman pink= reader
late night skate boarding with them. it's always cartman who texts you guys to go. in reality he only wants to go to just to start shit. in my opinion kenny is the best skater out of y'all. but cartman is the worst💀. "you guys you guys look im gonna go down the ramp!!" "cartman that isn't a good idea your not ready-" "WAAAAAHHHHH" laughter is coming out from you, stan, and kenny. kyle wants to laugh but he ain't risking it😭. "GAWDAMMIT KYLE IM BEAT YOUR J-" cartman stops himself because he knows damn well not to rip on kyle in front of you. so he switches up real fast 🙄. "you guys i seriously think i broke a bone" "whatever cartman you just switched up cause you know y/n would kick your ass" 5 minutes kenny is teaching you, stan, and kyle a trick. "ok so next you gotta-" "get a room lovebirds i mean come on🙄" "CARTMAN STFU!!" "yeah dude stay mad because your not psychically able to do any of this🥱" this all happens in less than 15 minutes, like why can't y'all just be a nice friend group😭. moments later stan was about to go off a ramp. UNTIL HIS WHEELS BROKE OFF THE SKATEBOARD. i wonder who unscrewed them..... "AAAUAGHHHHHH" "DON'T WORRY STAN I GOTCHU!!" and there he was, stanly marsh in your arms. "W rizz stan or nah😏" stan could feel his face heating up fr. "damn dude that should've been me not stan😔" "kenny shut the hell up💀" "wait a minute where's cartman he literally almost killed stan tf????" cartman isn't trying to get his ass kicked in front of people so he ditched and went home. classic cartman.
karaoke night. you guys are definitely singing 2000's songs. but it always seems like you guys get interrupted no matter what. karaoke night was started by cartman, which is so surprising?? "I WANNA HOLD'EM LIKE THEY DO IN TEXAS, PLEASE" "FOLD'EM LET'EM HIT ME RAISE IT BABY STAY WITH M-" stan and kyle always hating cause you and cartman sound a little too good. "BOOO GET OFF THE STAGE" "YA MY EARS ARE BLEEDING" "OH FUCK OFF GUYS LET US SING" "you guys have been singing this same song for 2 hours bruh😭" "2 minutes kenny get it right" they just hating cause they can't handle real talent. sometimes when the karaoke gets intense you guys act like judges for americas got talent💀. "is this kenny mccormick from south park colorado?" "yes" "and what will you be doing today?" "YOUR MOM AHAHA" "disqualified poor people can't seem to have talent" "CARTMAN WTF" "NEXT" "no wait i'll sing with him" "oh god" if kyle and stan think you and cartman sound a little too good. JUST WAIT UNTIL THEY HERE YOU AND KENNY. "THIS ONE IS FOR THE BOYS WITH THE BOOMIN SYSTEM" "TOP DOWN AC WITH THE COOLER SYSTEM" super bass by nicki minaj is y'alls go to song. every time you guys finish that song your out of breath and laugh so much😭. "AND THE CROWD GUYS MILD🔥" "NEXT" "cartman we are done playing americas got talent" "dude let me and kyle sing next we haven't sung at all🥹" "fine" "ah hell nah it better not be anything emo💀" *30 seconds later every one starts singing* "BUT IM A CREEP" "IM A WERIDO" "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOIN' HERE" "I DON'T BELONG HERE" suddenly the tv, microphones, and speaker goes out?? "LISTEN UP BITCHES IM NOT HAVING AN ALCOHOLIC, A JEW, A FATHERLESS DAUGHTER, AND A HOMELESS POOR BOY SING RADIOHEAD AT MY HOUSE‼️‼️" guess who got jumped that night🤔???
#south park#south park x reader#south park x y/n#south park x you#stan marsh#kyle broflovski#kenny mccormick#eric cartman#stan marsh x reader#kyle broflovski x reader#kenny mccormick x reader#eric cartman x reader#stan marsh x y/n#kyle broflovski x y/n#kenny mccormick x y/n#eric cartman x y/n
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