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ditzydreamsss · 5 months

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Ditzy's Council Headcanons :D

Charlie/Grizzly/Bizly/Condi !

Present me here: I NEVER POSTED THIS???? I completely forgot about it sobbb

hyperfixation's dead but i still hold them in my arms gently

please excuse the first few all just being about sex. i sincerely apologize for my past self's actions okie bye

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-- Charlie, Grizzly, and Bizly are the horny ones (there's some other way to word this but I can't think of anything else).

-- Condi's asexual. He's fine with it happening around him but doesn't want to be included in sex. Doesn't get the appeal.

-- In terms of power dynamics, I think Charlie would be top. Grizzly & Bizly both being switch. And Condi in his room regretting everything as the walls start shaking.

-- Condi would be loud(er) when he's with the rest of the boys, but he would be quiet(er) when outside with strangers/just other people in general, or during serious moments.

-- [Cat Bizly's from this other post] Bizly likes having cat ears and tail sometimes. Grizzly caught him staring at a mirror once and has been the #1 Cat Boy Bizly (also known as "Kibby") supporter ever since. I love kibby sm-

-- There was this one night the fuck trio (I. CAN'T call them that. I can't but it's the first thing that popped into my head) trio got so loud in the other room Condi physically got up and slammed his hand on the door. The trio on the other side absolutely lost it.

-- Everyone has a soft spot for Bizly.

-- Grizzly and Bizly were together first. Then Grizzly was like, "Uh, Bizly I think I like Charlie but we-" Then Bizly called Charlie and bluntly said, "You up to polyamory?" Then Charlie and Condi got together then the puzzle completed itself.

-- Charlie and Bizly and Grizzly are all into each other. Grizzly and Charlie loves Condi and vise versa. Condi and Bizly took some time, but they're good now :D Sometimes they feel like bros and sometimes they want to romantically cuddle.

-- Charlie's constantly showing PDA to his lovers. But he always, no matter what, asks if he can kiss though. Even if it ruins the moment (it doesn't).

-- Grizzly's fine with PDA. Bizly's also fine, though he prefers it when the place in empty. Condi doesn't really like PDA that much but if it'll make his beloveds happy, he'll do it. No kisses though.

-- They added their own bedrooms in Molympus but usually, they bring their pillows and blankets to the throne room and sleep in a big cuddle pile.

-- Grizzly and Bizly do be making out every corner. Oh and Charlie too.

-- This is after fallen arc. I love that hc so much im making that canon. idk they like, made out or something. Then everything was fine again.

-- Grizzly has abandonment issues. He sometimes just. Can't face Charlie. He clings onto Bizly when it's more active. Condi, if Bizly isn't there. Or just alone in his room, hugging Bizly's blue sweater he leaves behind when he goes out. Drowning in lava that isn't there. If it's really bad, Bizly teleports them out into the mortal world, goes to the comfort room and cuddles until Grizzly falls asleep. Clinging onto him like a lifeline.

-- The comfort room is a room made of blue stuff. Not a speck of red.

-- Grizzly’s the anime guy. Bizly’s the listener. Bizly doesn't really understand the fuck Grizzly's talking about but he sits it through for him. Bizly will sit through an hour and a half long rant about this anime he doesn't even know the name of (though he's probably gonna be distracted staring at Grizzly's face the entire time. "Adorable when passionate")

-- Meanwhile, Charlie's actually trying to learn the anime. Asking questions and stuff.

-- Condi probably knows the anime. Grizzly and Condi exchange headcanons often. Randomly barging into each other's rooms after knocking 10 times and half yelling "Have you watched the new episode yet??"

-- Grizzly will sometimes make this wing cocoon thing if he gets overwhelmed.

-- Hey guys, Bizly has trauma too. If someone genuinely accuses him, and pushes it too far, he will cry. Alone. In his room. And he gets uncomfy now as the butt of the joke. The most random, small things can trigger stuff, especially when Bizly’s tired. He flinches when there’s a sudden loud noise. Reacts way more than a god with so many senses should.

-- Cat Bizly. Dog Grizzly. Do they go into space? Sometimes. They can actually turn into the animal. Bizly is a blue cat, Grizzly is a pug. Not sure about puppy grizz but pretty solid on cat biz.

-- Grizzly is overprotective over Bizly. Vise versa. They will literally hiss/growl.

-- Charlie’s usually the big dipper. Gribzly can be both but after the fallen arc, Bizly became small (BIZLY PEQUENO). Condi’s small for Charlie and big for Gribzly. [Listen, we have to shorten some terms. Like removing the “dipper”.]

-- Gribzly. Condicicle. Yes. (They’re still all gay for each other, it’s just those pairs are closer to each other.)

-- Grizzly laughs at almost every single one of Charlie’s jokes. Condi comes right after. Then there’s Bizly, deadpanning. Or making his own joke, while Grizzly’s dying in the background.

-- Too many times people walked into a Gribzly make out session.

-- So despite everything I said about gribzly and charlie, grizzly really does love Charlie. Vise versa. They're usually holding hands when they're out. Usually always. Like, they're both so clingy.

-- They need therapy desperately. I forgot if I said this before. Between Charlie and Ted, I think the council's kind of fucked relationship will pop up in casual conversation at some point in the podcast. They cut it out, but off camera Ted asks if Charlie wants him to help, and offers to therapy the bois.

-- Condi sometimes uses they/he or they/them, depends on the time.

-- I just want to make everyone, even Schlatt, all respectful with identities. Like Schlatt might have teamed up with someone but that someone turns out to be homophobic and even though Schlatt's winning, the ram man's gonna pulverize the homophobe right there if that teammate doesn't apologize/fix their mistake.

-- Bizly or Charlie sometimes walks into Condi and Grizzly clinging to each other as they cry about anime. Bizly slowly closes the door while Charlie asks what's wrong. Depends on how severe the damage is, whether they respond or not.

-- They know the future has changed for them, especially Charlie and Condi, mostly Condi. Charlie sometimes gets nightmares of a swarm of zombies pushing him into lava, a chess game with a ghost, but only thinks those are weird nightmares. Condi knows more. He tries to ignore what the Code is trying to tell him, that this isn’t right and isn’t real.

-- Clinginess meter: past maximum. All of them.

-- Bizly (sometimes) has blue-ish black cat ears.

-- Grizzly has the doggo ears and tail.

-- Charlie can literally turn into slime, right on the spot. It's kinda disturbing so he doesn't do it (or tries to not) in front of other people. It's terrifying, really, seeing him melt.

-- Charlie in my hc looks pretty much the same with his minecraft skin except he has a green cape thing and looks a bit more powerful.

-- Condi is a dragon hyrbid thing. (i got it from here)

-- Oh and also, Bizly's glasses does this small robot eyes screen thing (that is not a good description uhh). Like his sunglasses are like a small screen and theres eyes and shows his emotions. Like fallen biz (HELP ITS JUST. PERMANENTLY MADE A HOME IN MY BRAIN).

-- So this au hc thing. Fallen arc, fallen au canon to here. I guess Charlie and Condi went to the nether (jumped into the pit) bc condi was like ":(" and then the squad fought each other. Bizly was genuinely ready to kill Charlie. Charlie's like "Are- are you hissing??" Cause cat. And then Charlie repents, apologizes, regrets, but that doesn't work until Condi: "im sorry :(" then they're suddenly all gay for each other again and happily ever after.

-- this means they never killed the dragon. dragon and condi are good friends.

-- dragon actually trusts condi enough (i mean, technically, condi created the dragon so) anyways trusts him enough to give him her only egg. The squad needs to raise the dragon and bonds and stuff.

-- idk baeby dragon's name. help /gen

-- Condi casually covering baeby's ears as the bedroom shakes at night the other side of the wall-

-- Baeby keeps trying to eat Charlie's slimes. rip.

Charlie: Condi. baeby's trying to eat me. Condi: Wh- Charlie: My slimes :(

-- they get it sorted out (no they don't, the council doesn't do shit, they're too busy making out). slimes combine into one big slime and assert dominance. they get along now.

-- There's a reason why "pudding" will never be added to minecraft. Yeah. The council literally destroyed the existence of it.

-- Grizzly is a sucker for headpats. Literally melts in your arms. I mean he'll probably growl if it's not his lovers.

-- Charlie can just fly, no wings (for being so close to the Code, he gets free stuff ig).

-- the Code is what makes up the world. it's not exactly alive, nor sentient, but it's like. not dead either.

-- Condi can just naturally fly too. He has enough power to make new worlds, he can do a lil bit of floating. He kind of borrow's the Void's power and manipulates it to apply it to himself to float. His wings are for decoration/intimidation/battle purposes.

-- Bizly and Grizzly both have the angel wings, Bizly's being more blue and Grizzly's being red and grey.

-- When the teacher is late, Grizzly would be the one in the corner watching anime with Condi, weebs gathering and making a small circle around them.

-- Grizzly writes and reads fanfics. The little (big) pile of notebooks hidden in that one corner of him room is one thing he'll never let anyone look through (besides maybe Condi).

-- Wait hold onto these thoughts. I have an au idea-

-- When Bizly feels a really strong emotion, his glasses change red like when he was fallen.

-- Order the council says ily the most: charlie, gribzly tied (make up with cuddles / physical affection), condi (make up with shows of trust)

-- Charlie's really soft to Bizly when they're alone.

-- Bizly acts embarrassed and pushes Charlie away in public but he loves his affection.

sorry if I repeat any of the same stuff, there's way too much and I'm not looking for it

-- The group runs out of food. What do they do?

~~ Grizzly's too busy binging anime to be hungry. Condi's with Grizzly and eating snacks instead of actual food.

~~ Charlie cooks food with help of his slimes.

~~ Bizly doesn't realize Charlie's cooking food and orders takeout.

~~ The trio's eating when Bizly walks into the room to see that they already have food. L.

-- DID I EVER TELL YOU ABOUT HOW FRICKING CLINGY THEY ALL ARE??

-- what if condi just sneezed one day after the council got their powers but instead of mucus he left behind a small split in the air leading to another dimension. and he was like "whatthefuck but also.. what?? the fuck??"

-- back to the dragon, im thinking of the name Pigstep? cause thats the name of the disc that was playing at the end of To The End.

#slimecicle cinematic universe #ditzy scu corner #gribzly #too lazy to tag more

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mageofminge · 8 months

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where i've been the past few months

just wanna say sorry i haven't been posting as much, for the past few months i've basically been dealing with at least 2 separate health conditions at a time and no matter how much i try i can never seem to get well again. its honestly just been taking a massive toll on my mental health and i haven't been able to do much other than get by on a daily basis.

i'm also just rlly angry rn bc i was always healthy before but my body's just been completely worn out from both studying and uni stress, as well as living in halls so grim people would regularly get food poisoning from the kitchens and not being able to afford to eat out. i just hate the people that made the kitchen grim by not knowing basic food hygiene, then refused to listen when i tried to explain that hey, you can't put raw meat on top of other people's vegetables, even if it is in packaging because, crazy idea, that packaging can in fact break causing raw meat juice to spill all over the veggies.

there's also the element of religion stuff in the sense that, there was this rlly holy day in my religion, but bc of the rest of my family not being particularly religious or almost wanting me to not be religious so they can hate on me, i didn't know it was the holy day until afterwards. and i uh. did something that was. a massive no-no. on the literal holiest day. in my religion. and then that combined with. all the health issues only happening after that. basically my brain is always now blaming me for causing those health issues by being reckless and doing a big nono. rather than double checking online bc i had heard it was the following day and so assumed that night was safe. and again this is completely illogical but because the timing lines up so well it keeps popping back in my head that i wouldn't be so sickly if i had observed that holy day properly.

oh and also finally i've been struggling with the public healthcare system a lot bc everyone ive seen has either refused fully comprehensive testing or just refused to test me at all (i assume to save money). only to waste more money by playing guesswork and prescribing me antibiotics i don't need (the antibiotic in question being FLUCLOXACILLIN for STAPH, which has A HIGH RATE OF ANTIBIOTIC RESISTANCE, caused by using them when not needed). oh and again waste money by me having to constantly come in for follow ups and follow ups because the one stool test they decided to run came back negative so why are you still ill.

and also throughout this whole illness my family has been pretty horrible. whenever i need to do smth bc im ill they always act like im a spoilt brat who's being a massive pain. as though them being mildly inconvenienced by my illness is a grave sin. like one time i got rlly bad food poisoning and had to throw up multiple times over the span of an hour. and then also had diarrhea that was so severe it was like i was shitting literal water. this was on holiday at like 3-4am. and then at like 8 after i had gone back to sleep for the time and woken up my family were all yelling at me telling me to be considerate and not be so loud at 3-4am. knowing. i had just. vomitted and shat my guts out. from food poisoning.

and with all that combined being ill just generally sucks. like the only person who actually is considerate and takes care of me is my bf. who ive tried to stay with as much as possible but its incredibly difficult bc my parents also randomly decide to have severe abandonment issues and act like im leaving a gaping hole in their lives every time im not at home. but then treat me like they strongly dislike me and im a massive inconvenience when i am home.

so yeah basically these past few months have just been me cosplaying as a sickly victorian child asking to be taken out to the garden one last time before the consumption sets in.

#anyways its terrifying how much someone changes up #when you get ill #im glad at least my bf is nice about it #illness #food poisioning #jean's vents #flucloxacillin #antibiotic resistance

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niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian · 2 years

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You ever have a good original idea for a book or book that can become a movie one day you think hey I should get to work and start creating? But then you think about after facing the challenges of getting your idea out there it’s subject to being changed by movie studios that may and can cut important info from the source material you poured your heart in and they’ll just make it weird with hot actors who can’t even save the most cringey lines the editors will put in the film? And even if you made a book not everyone reads books that much you fear and it will be lost to the fading light that is the library and bookstore lands?

This was me at 3am after getting up for some water and couldn’t head back to sleep and ended up having an existential crisis over a “what if” scenario that popped into my head. Just a regular daily thing for me😓

Hey there Non.

I'm not gonna lie, I've had PLENTY of ideas that I would have pop up in my mind when brainstorming randomly, even at times writing the ideas out in synopsis form with little dialogue tidbits and potential character arcs if I ever choose to write about it in the future, not just in terms of stuff for like Sonic or other fandoms but just OG story ideas that were created over the course of a couple of months that were just inspired by stuff I've watched over the years.

And each time I would put more time to explore those ideas, that same negative feeling of thinking what would happen to said stories and/or characters if it got accepted into some big, well-known studio or company and having it become a lesser version of what it initially was because they kept changing things that probably didn't need to be changed or taken out.

But that was before I got more accustomed to other means in terms of that, like posting artwork on websites like Instagram or Deviantart, sharing stories you've written on Ao3 and FF.Net, creating a comic series and posting it on Webtoons for everyone to see. Or even on sites like Tumblr, where you can pretty much do all three on a single blog! Even comic strips that started out on here got to become cartoons and shows on their own in due time.

We can't always let those what-ifs get in our way to try and get out there in the hectic world, cause otherwise we could end up missing out on opportunities where it'll be everything we'd ever dreamed of doing. For some creators, they'd rather do the safe route and be a small, part time creator and continue making content for the audience they gained while others want to aim for the big leagues like YouTube or a animation studio and give their content a shot to be made into a property.

Both routes are good choices, but it’s mainly up to you to choose how you want your content to be known on the web. It's different for everyone, it would probably come to you in a couple of weeks or months, but in due time...lighting will strike and you'll act upon with no doubt on your mind.

#long post #asks answered #anonymous

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ask-the-smol-spider · 2 years

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“Wait wait wait, Let’s talk about this okay?”

Alex stared blankly at the Strange boy, she didn’t know much about her sense thing but it acting up means that she’s in danger, right?

…maybe she should ask Pete about it later when she has- well whatever this is figured out first.

“You literally snuck up on me,” Alex huffed, molten tightening their grip on his arm defensively. “Only Villains sneak up on people, especially when they’re very sleep and half awake!”

“B-But Im not here to hurt you, Honest!”

“And how can I be trust you?”

“Because we’re kinda the same, y’know weird sense and stuff” He gestured to himself with his only free arm, “When I saw you back then it just went all weird and I’m not sure why”

“Back then?” Alex tilted her slightly in confusion, thinking back to the time her sense randomly reactivated.

But why did it reactive? She wasn’t in any danger at the time, and if she was molten would have been the first to notice, Besides as far as she is aware she was the only spider hero in her dimension-

“Wait a second!” Alex stood up straight, “You’re just like me- You got bit by a spider!”

Everything seems to click into place, a part of her was really happy that she wasn’t alone in this dimension after all but a part was oddly confused on how she hasn’t picked this up earlier, he must have gotten bit recently then.

“Wait you got bit too!?”

Alex nodded excitedly, “I’m so happy I’m not the only spider hero in this world after all!”

“Spider hero? Wait, Are you..that spark-Spider that was in the newspaper a few weeks ago?”

There was an awkward silence between the two.

“You are, aren’t you?”

“…I Dunno..” She muttered looking off to the side,it was pretty obvious that she was lying. “You’re not gonna tell that bully Jonah, right? I’m already in as much trouble as it is”

She thought back to her breakdown, she could have hurt people- she almost did. She just wished she wasn’t scared all the time then maybe she would have better control of everything.

Maybe she would still be in school, living a regular life, doing normal things a kid her age should be doing instead of hiding from her fate.

Her father would find her eventually, he always does.

“Miles morales” he spoke up suddenly. “That’s my name”

Alex looked at him confused as he continued to tell her more about himself - turns out he’s a Spider-Man fan as well.

“There, Now you know personal stuff about me,” He offered a smile, “I won’t tell anyone about you or your secret identity and I’m not going to pry into your personal life either”

I like this one! Molten said happily Quickly, ask if he wants to be lonely with us!

“Thanks miles,” She thoughts about it for a moment before smiling, “I’m Alex and this is molten, sorry for how they acted earlier they’re just really really overprotective”

Molten popped their head out of the base the scarf, examining miles with curious eyes.

“Wha- wait It’s alive?!”

#spidersona #alex the smol spider #spiderverse #spidersonas #spiderman #alex wilson #spider man into the spider verse #I feel better today #hi #mod smol #miles morales #finally #story Related

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princess-pill-enjoyer · 2 years

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#26

I took 150 last night and somehow passed out on it so I'm finna take 350 now that I'm awake so that I can get slightly high while being mostly sober by the time my bsf calls me today.

AFTERMATH

I took wayyyy more than 350. I think I took 1.1k overall. Took 200 and let it wear off completely instead of taking the extra 150 after a bit like I planned. Then I started crying.. then I chilled for a bit.. then cried some more. It got badddd I was snotting it up and my arm was genuinely wet wet from all rapidly flowing eye water smh

When I got otp with my best friend I was soberish. I was still crying at that point but I made sure I wasn't sobbing in her ear or anything. She had me spill the beans and by the end of it i was cackling off her mocking my sniffles. She's such a dick i stg 😭

Anyway after she calmed me dowm, she dipped to do some busy work with her mom. I ended up popping another 850 in the meantime. She said she'd be back in 30 mins and I think it was uh.. I think an hour and a half atp so I figured she forgot and I was off the hook for the day. But nah. She texted then called me and I had.. absolutely zero chance of hiding how gone I was.

Mostly I can still hide the junk even when I'm sky high cause with pretty much anyone else im not doing a lot of the talking and my slight chuckles and agreement noises is usually enough. R, however, is fucking hilarious and I'm always laughing at stupid shit she'll say. Which is kinda a problem asss i have a hard time laughing while im that high. My mouth and throat be so dry and to a point where talking in itself is a big task so laughing is pretty much out the question. Plus, kinda weird but i have a hard time finding anything funny in general. Soo when I was sitting there super quiet and not reacting much to stuff she'd say, I ended up fessing up so she wouldn't overthink my silence. Knowing her she probably would've blamed it on herself somehow so it wasn't even worth hiding imo.

It was kinda sad tbh. I'm glad we did get to talk some yesterday but we did way less talking than we'd usually do cause of all of that junk. I went to sleep promptly after we got off the phone as I felt weird. And kinda sad ngl.

When I first woke up I could still feel the remnants of yesterday's dose and I was exhausted but couldn't sleep anymore as I had already slept for I think... 10 hours? Maybe 9 I dunno

Aside from that symptom wise I'm mostly normal. Still feel a little floaty and I'm not 100% for full ass convos rn. I wanna sleep some more but I have a kitchen to clean + I was picking at my skin again so I need to do some aftercare on my skin to minimize scarring as much as I can. I mostly pick at my legs and for that I don't really bother with caring for scars. While I don't really cut myself anymore and I wasn't too too into it before either, my thighs are still covered in scars from them. That plus a few scars that have only recently fully went away made me care a lot less for how my legs look. But nowadays I be forgetting to keep my picking to my legs and started picking at my face again. That I try to hide cause my dad constantly comments on shit like that and I just don't want him to acknowledge it

Lowkey dealing with heartburn and sharp pain in my stomach. Prolly cause I took that much at once and didn't really eat before. I had hella cereal earlier in the day and that was about it

I really gotta start remembering to eat.. I'm fat and all (well. Chubby. Mfs get so confused when I call myself fat 💀) but at the same point I think it'd be kinda sus if I randomly lose weight weight like that. Especially with how shady I've been acting lmao

NOTES/EMOTIONS

Mm. I don't know how to explain my mindset rn. I feel completely useless and I want to just wither away and get forgotten by everyone all at once. I'm sure that's due to the mix of bs I have floating around in my head. I'm tryna keep it together tho. I haven't been drinking enough water as is and I'm sure me crying again is gonna make that worseeee so I'll just try and distract myself for now

I'm so fucking tired of crying. Why can't I just be happy

#dph #benadryl #diphenhydramine #dph addiction #trip reports #vent

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sock-milk · 2 years

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I don't feel loveable. I don't feel desirable. And everyday I feel less loved and less desired. Even after he holds me and tells me I'm worth it, even after he and I pleasure each other. I hate the way I am and so does he, so why do I have such a hard time doing anything right? Everytime I speak to him he's annoyed because he's doing something else, but he always is. I rarely find time to talk to him without interrupting something we are doing. I assumed that that's how conversations usually are but I was mistaken. He is hurting and so am I. Why do we have to hurt each other.

Many weeks ago I've been told that he would do things for me to please me. He had done this multiple times, but last time he said he may eat me out. As usual, he was never in the mood. The other day he was playing with me and asked if I showered. I said I hadn't and he said that when I did he had a surprise for me. I showered the next night and even shaved and got into a cute outfit. But he just wanted to sleep. So we slept. Yesterday, the day after, I wore the same shirt and white panties. Later last night we were on Twitter and I discovered my old account where i liked and shared some nsfw stuff, mostly cnc. Some of it was extremely shameful. He then asked me to suck his dick. I asked if I could get a pillow for my knees and put my hair up; he said no. I painfully got on my knees and did my job while he tried to play a game. Then he had me sit on his cock, going up and down sometimes. Then we walked, with him still inside of me, to the bed where he bent me over and fucked me nicely. Yeah it was nice. But I wasn't satisfied. He said we may or may not have more sex later that night but not to get my hopes up. I told myself it wasn't happening so I wouldn't hope, but I couldn't help it. I've been hoping for this for basically months. Last night he told me to go to bed and that he was gonna stay up for a while longer. Due to what he said earlier and the fact that he had liked a tweet along the lines of "fuck me in my sleep," I held out hope. I thought about what he might do to me and I fucking hoped harder than ever that everything would go right that night. Meanwhile I was also severely fucking anxious. I couldn't stop thinking about him leaving or hating me, that he's fucking repulsed by me so ofc he wouldn't want to be with me. I also dealt with a lot of uncontrollable memories that randomly popped into my head to make me feel more shame or self hatred. I tried to fall asleep and tell myself that whatever Ash wants to do tonight will happen. But I just couldn't stop shaking and occasionally crying. When he finally came to bed, he just laid down with me. It wasn't what I craved but I was relieved. We started talking and he said he was wide awake. Eventually he got up and said he wanted to stay up. I had been waiting so long for him and i was in a terrible place mentally, but it seems that the times that I need him most are the times that I upset him further. I don't remember exactly what I said but I begged him to stay and i held onto him. He got mad because my sadness was obvious to him and he felt guilt tripped. He said he feels like that a lot and that he doesn't really have free will. He also reminded me of his tormenting nightmares and that's why he hates sleeping. I didn't know what to say or do. I just wanted to cry and tell him that I need him but that would only have made everything worse. I need to work on how I react to things externally, not showing how disappointed or in pain I truly am. I said I try to suppress my reactions and he yelled at me basically saying it's not true. But he doesn't feel the pressure that builds up inside when I try not to cry, but a tear is still shed. He doesnt understand that I shake because I'm trying to keep the pain inside like I'm a dam, not because I'm trying to make him physically feel my pain. He sees me as unnecessarily overreactive, and I certainly am, but he doesn't feel the true extent of it. He doesnt feel my chest tighten up, or my neck muscles start to cramp up, or my stomach getting queasy, or the veins in my arms fucking burning. I hide all of that and I am still too much for people.

Last night, I was also too scared to admit that part of my pain was sexual. Sex means nothing to him, nothing good. He says he doesn't care about sex, but that's because it's easy for him. He always gets satisfied. I have been willing to do damn near anything for him, things that make me genuinely uncomfortable, even things that fucking hurt like kneeling without a cushion under my knees. I assumed a long time ago that the more effort I put into pleasing him, the more effort he would put into pleasing me. I am, once again, very sadly mistaken. And I have no idea how to deal with this. He is insecure about sex and the fact that he hasn't been making me cum is a part of that apparently, but he doesn't seem to make much effort to. The last time he "tried" and had his fingers on my mostly dry clit and then gave up. I don't know what tf to do. How do I admit something so shameful that sexual dissatisfaction has been negatively affecting my mentality, enhancing my own insecurities and fears? Especially when it means so little to him. He would think I'm a ridiculous slut. Or maybe he already thinks that. I don't know. He is worth everything to me, I just wish I was worth a little bit to him.

#6:55pm

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percontaion-points · 2 years

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Crave chapters 6-8

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Chapter 6

But once I banish thoughts of my old life, it isn’t Alaska that woke me up at—I glance at the clock—3:23 in the morning. And it’s not Alaska that’s keeping me awake.

It’s him. Jaxon Vega.

Grace: I'm not going to be yet another simpering protaganist in a YA supernatural romance!

Also Grace, not even 12 hours later: Jaxon.

“It means we’ve had three different meetings about you, all warning us to be on our best behavior. It’s annoying as hell. Right, Quinn?”

And yet, they're still going to harass the headmaster's niece. Sounds like an amazing plan, gentlemen. /sarcasm

He shifts, braces himself, and that’s when it hits me. What they’re planning on doing. And just how much danger I’m really in.

Chapter 6 summary: Grace wakes up in the middle of the night, disoriented and confused. She can't get back to sleep because of swirling thoughts about Jaxon. But as she tries to push him from her mind (after spending way too much page-time thinking about him), she starts to have another panic attack because of thoughts of everything that put her here in Alaska.

She used to run whenever she had those thoughts, but obviously she can't here. So she instead decides to explore the castle a little bit. It's creepy in the dark, and she uses the light from her phone to guide her.

She was thinking about poking her head out the school's front door to see if the aurora borealis was in view of the doors, when two boys come in. Obviously vampires, because they're not even wearing coats. Anyway, after a lot of “playing with their food”, they decide that they're going to shove Grace outside into the snow and lock her out. Uh-huh.

Chapter 7

...and it’s no more than ten degrees out there.

At the landing strip, she'd checked her phone and it had said twenty below. At night, it gets colder, not warmer.

Then brings his thumb to his lips and— holding my gaze with his own—sticks his thumb in his mouth and slowly sucks off the blood.

It’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen, and I don’t even know why. I mean, shouldn’t this be totally creeping me out?

Maybe it’s the way his eyes heat up the second he tastes my blood.

Girl is too busy popping a lady-boner to put two and two together.

“How do you know what my old high school was like?”

“I don’t,” he says with a smirk. “But I can guarantee it’s nothing like Katmere Academy.”

Jaxon’s right—of course he’s right—but I’m not about to back down now. “You don’t know that.”

Even if you ignore the supernatural elements, it's odd to think of a giant castle in the middle of San Diego. I think people would have noticed that.

And I’m left wondering when I’ll see him again. And why it matters so much that I do.

Chapter 7 summary: The two random bullies torment Grace for way too long. They also move super fast, and the entire thing is nothing but a giant pile of “UGH.” Anyway, as you can imagine, Jaxon shows up and puts a stop to it. The boys apologize to Jaxon, but Jaxon pointedly tells them that they need to apologize to Grace, not him. So they do before Jaxon dismisses them; they run off super fast.

Once they're gone, Jaxon tells her that he'd warned her not to go sticking her nose into places where it doesn't belong. That she's dragged herself into this. The entire thing is dumb, because it's not like her uncle was going to abandon her after her parents died, but whatever.

Jaxon then goes “oh, you're bleeding” and randomly starts sucking on her thumb. The entire thing is so laughably bad; I cannot. He then tells her to go back to her room, and to not come out in the middle of the night again.

Chapter 8

“Besides, we have a party to go to this evening and you need to be able to find your makeup and hair stuff.”

Of course there's going to be a party.

I'm betting booze and zero adult supervision.

Edit from the future: I'm still betting booze.

“I swear we’re not all bad. Look at Flint. He’s great, right?” “He really was.” I can’t help smiling as I think of the way he teased me, called me New Girl.

Marc and Quinn called her “new girl”, but she's not blushing over that...

Still, after going two rounds with Jaxon—both of which ended with him warning me off—it’s hard not to wonder exactly what I’ve gotten myself into here.

Chapter 8 summary: Grace had somehow wasted 2 hours with all of that. When she gets back to the dorm, she doesn't want to wake Macy, but doesn't want to sit around and think about what happened. But Macy wakes up anyway. Grace tells her what happened, but leaves Jaxon out of it, and says that the two of them took off when they realized that the three of them had company. Macy gets really angry, and Grace has half a thought to tell Macy not to tell Finn about it.

Macy then tells Grace that she unpacked Grace's things the night before. And that there's going to be a party in Grace's honor that afternoon. School does a monthly high tea thing “to promote unity” (whatever the fuck that means), and they're going to be a bit more festive to welcome Grace to the school. She asks if she should cancel it, but Grace says no. And thinks that she's going to have to meet everybody sooner or later, so it might as well be under adult supervision in a classroom setting.

Grace asks if they have Netflix, and Macy is like “obviously.” Grace starts to tell her about a supernatural vampire show she'd been watching with her friend back home, and Macy is nervously like “Ah yes. Vampires. Great.” So they lounge around and start watching the series from the beginning.

#Crave series #Crave (Crave 1)#chapter 06 #chapter 07 #chapter 08 #Grace (Crave)#jaxon vega #can we not #do as i say not as i do #shitty people doing shitty things #random background characters are random #I would ask where the editor was but I think we all know there was none #i'm done goodbye #Flint (Crave)#Macy (Crave)

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kakashish0e · 2 years

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First Chance (Second Part) || Gaara x Reader

♥︎ Master list

-This is the second part! Here's are the links for the whole series.

♥︎ PART ONE, PART TWO

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I didn't know what I was doing but I decided to make a second part of the story (it just randomly popped into my head, I just had so many ideas for a second part and I didn't want them to go to waste) So I just used the remaining of my brain cells to make a part two lol. I wasn't as professional as I thought I was at first, but I'm starting to get the hang of it (i think). Just need some more time to be better at it I promise. But I am really grateful for all the support you gave me for the past four months, I really appreciate it <3 (but anyways enjoy♡)

Pairings: Gaara x Fem! Reader

Word count: 10.1k

Content Warning: A little argument between gaara and the reader, Mentions Of Sex, Teasing, Begging, A little bit of Grinding, Slight Fingering, Office Sex, Praise kink, Unprotected Sex, Breeding

[Please ignore any word errors if you see any, thank you]

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You started to stirr awake, still sleepy and felt like going back to sleep but you needed to get up anyways. Your body just felt a little sore so you just layed there, waiting for your eyes to adjust to the slight darkness for a little while. You looked looked to the side and you had noticed that there was no sign of gaara anywhere, he probably had left to the office early or something. So you looked around his room, checking if there's a clock anywhere, wondering what time it was. And to your surprise, that it was 9:57, you were late. Really late and he didn't even bother to wake you up to get ready, he just left you here, naked and alone.

You tossed your head back into the pillows, and started to think. The flashbacks of last night started rushing through your head had you blushing like crazy, just the sight of your little body in his hands, under his mercy. The way he looked down at you with those lust filled eyes. Don't forget the way his hands were touching you so gently like you were fragile glass, his fingers going at a soft pace, but yet it still gave you a whole lot of pleasure you couldn't handle. His soft lips kissing yours, God you just want to live that moment all over again.

The way he entered you so soft and slow; thinking that he might hurt you, Butterflies started to flutter in your stomach. A giggle left your lips when you remembered that he called you "my love". You knew all those memories won't ever be forgotten, that was probably the only time you have ever seen him like that, so sweet and sensitive to your love.

You quickly got out of your little day dream and jumped out of bed. Putting on your discarded clothes from last night, when i tell you that your clothes were everywhere, I mean it.

Your shirt was in the living room and your skirt was in the hallway, your bra thrown on the floor and your underwear was on his side of the bed. It took you forever to find your other shoe and started to wonder how it ended up in the kitchen, and from what you remembered, it was all him. He took all your clothes off and threw them at random places before taking you to his bedroom.

After getting all your stuff and you got dressed. You had soon realized that you couldn't just go back to the office in the same clothes as yesterday, so you've decided that you'd run back home and change. You knew it would be better to shower since you and gaara had been working up a sweat all night, but you didn't want to risk getting caught by your older brothers. They'd be all over you and be demanding answers of where you have been all night.

Even getting through the front door would get you yelled at. So the most obvious thing you would do was get in your room through a window. It had been years since you had done that. The last time you done it, you were sneaking out to go to temari's party that she invited you to go. Obviously your father said no but your mother said yes. Of course his answer overpowered hers and you weren't allowed to go.

And just as you came back from the party, your dad was just leaning on your door from inside your room, waiting for your mysterious return. He obviously grounded you for weeks but it's different today since you were an adult and you knew you shouldn't get in by the window like some crazy teenager but it was the only way to avoid the countless questions.

You crawled through the window and instantly fell of the floor, you froze and kept quiet for a moment. Trying to hear the slightest footstep, it was kinda weird that the house was dead silent in the mornings. Usually you'd hear your brothers arguing about something meaningless but it's just quiet today. It was probably because they were out on a mission or something, it didn't really matter as long as they're gone and not in your way. Just when you thought no one was home you quickly rushed to your closet and grabbed a new pair of clothes.

You literally just grabbed anything that was right in front of you. Getting a new pair of shoes, brushing all the knots out of your hair, you couldn't do anything with your hair at the moment so you decided to leave it down for today.

It was already past 10:30 and you rushed out of the room as fast as you could. Only thinking about what you had forgotten but it seemed like you got everything you needed to go back to work. You thought that no one was really home so you decided to get out through the front door like any normal person would do. Besides, it was really hard to get in through the window and you thought that you'd actually get hurt by getting out.

You peeked through the door of your parent's room to check if your mom was there since you didn't see anyone in the living room or the kitchen. To your surprise that she was actually there, sleeping peacefully. But why was she her all by herself? You usually weren't home to worry about her but she probably was tired since you never come home to help her like usual. You started to wonder where your father went.

He shouldn't be on a mission because he said that he'd be staying at home all week, because he was complaining that his back started hurting. So where could he have gone?

You really had no time to worry since your mother was just sleeping, maybe they'd return when you come back from work, you weren't very sure but you know that when your dad is out with his friends, he'd usually come back before dark and throw himself on the couch and start watching tv and making a fuss about everything like a two year old. So it really wasn't a big problem worrying about him.

You began to leave the house with everything you needed for today, and started to walk to the kazekage's office. All the flashbacks of last night kept rushing through your head all at one second. It was like they were trying to make you feel ashamed. Of course sleeping with the kazekage was a big deal to say the least. Not one girl in sunagakure would be brave enough to do that, in fact they're all scared to even go near him. Well that's what the rumors you heard. And it had to be Y/N L/N, the girl which gaara claimed that he loves.

There was no doubt in the world that he wasn't lying about it, he confessed his love for you, he kissed you, he marked you, claiming every inch of your little body as his, he touched you and he wasn't even nervous about it, and most of all he fucked you.

Then there's that love bite he gave you, you still don't even know what gave him the idea of putting it in the most noticeable spot. You even had to wear a button down to use the collar of the shirt just to hide all the hickeys that were painted all across your shoulder to your collarbone, because most of all the shirts you had were open neck. You were just really thankful to him that he didn't put any on your neck because that would've been even more harder to hide.

I mean he did put some but they just weren't as serious as the others were. But still, he didn't have to put so many of them on you.

----

You had finally entered the kazekage's building but it had left you all tired and a bit sweaty from speed walking, out of all the hot days. Why did suna choose to be really hot today? You were used to the hot temperatures in the sand village but today was more sweltering than usual. Was nature really trying to punish you because of last night or what?

And we're back to square one. You were just standing there behind the door to his office once again. The same as the first day you started working here. Who wouldn't be nervous to enter his office after what had happened last night? First reason was because you were late, second reason was because you both clearly fucked and he had just abandoned you in his bedroom all alone. Even the smallest scold by him would get you blushing like crazy.

Before you grabbed the door handle, you felt someone tap your shoulder lightly to grab your attention. So you turned your head slightly and you gasped a little. It was temari and kankuro. You couldn't even move a muscle, you were just in complete shock, you were just standing there all frozen like some scarecrow. "Hey y/n! How have you been for the past few months? Do you like your job here or not?" Said the blonde kunoichi with a big smile on her face, she was obviously happy to see you since she hadn't for quite some time.

The big question was why are they here? Well kankuro has a reason because he lives here but why is temari here? You had remembered that she previously mentioned that she was gonna start going to konoha more frequently and she did end up staying there for over a month.

You didn't know why but it would be a rude thing to ask. Since you hadn't seen them in months. You let an awkward smile and greeted the older sand siblings. "Y/n why are you standing here? Is something wrong with the door or what?" You jolted out of your position you were standing in and made a small excuse which seemed to work.

"No the door is working just fine it's just that I arrived here a little late and it seems that we both got here at the same time that's all." you said as you let a awkward laugh scratched the back of your head so nervously. God you didn't know what you were saying and it was obvious that you were flustered like always. "Alright then let's get in shall we? All we have to do is tell gaara some important news and we'll be good to go" Kankuro said with a big smile on his face. Rather more it looked like a smirk than a smile. It looked like the same exact one that you had seen on temari when she suggested this job to you.

You stepped aside so they could get in first. Deep down in your stomach, you knew it was gonna be something bad. You wanted to ask but at the same time you didn't want to know. They were going to say it either way when they tell gaara so you remained silent and walked in quietly behind kankuro and temari.

You could tell that gaara's eyes were fixed to your direction when you were setting down binders and folders on your desk. Which caused you to turn a bit red and sweat a little. You sat in your desk, pretending like you were busy doing something while you wait for temari and kankuro to break the news that you were dying to hear.

But all you heard was little arguments about who should tell him, and they both decided that temari was gonna say it and if gaara didn't understand her then kankuro was gonna say it in the most easiest way possible.

While you were busy filling out and organizing paperwork, you tried your best to remain calm while you were trying to hear what they have to say to gaara.

"So gaara... Um how do i say this... You know what let's start off with some questions okay? Are you seeing anyone? Like dating wise. Because that should make the situation easier."

He looked at you for a split second and back at temari. Not knowing how to explain it. Even you don't know how to explain the current relationship between you and gaara. The awkward silence filled the room while gaara was trying to find a way to explain the complicated relationship between the two of you in his head. Because it wasn't like the both of you had sex without actually talking things through, it just happened so suddenly.

Temari and kankuro took that silence as a no since gaara wasn't responding. "Well if you don't find anyone in two weeks then the council will have to settle an arranged marriage for you" Your eyes widened and it felt as if your heart was teared right out of your chest. Were they being serious right now? They have to be joking... Right? Arranged marriage?!

-"And why is that?" gaara said so curiously. Looking back up at his older siblings, who were trying their best to explain it in the most understandable way possible.

You were really thankful that gaara had asked that question to them because you had questions of your own as well, But you were too nervous and scared to ask them yourself.

"Well basically they want you and somebody else to procreate for the new heir of kazekage, to make it more understandable for you"

Gaara was left with a blank expression on his face and you were on the verge of fainting. Arranged marriage? Kids? They shouldn't be rushing him like that, he's only nineteen. Well you take back the kids part since it already happened. He Just randomly had sex with his eighteen year old assistant. And he probably still hasn't felt ashamed for doing it. You and gaara were just one year apart, it really wasn't that bad or anything. And yet it felt so wrong afterwards, you knew that everyone will find out eventually and you were ready for that time to come.

If it was the condition of raising his child in order for him not to marry another woman then you'd do it. You'd basically do anything for that not to happen. Even if you'd have to be stuck at home being gaara's house wife then you'd be more than happy to except it. Wait now let's just calm down... Last time you checked, you said being a housewife was a definite No. But if it's to save gaara from having kids with someone else then it's a different story.

- "gaara shouldn't have any problem looking for a partner, my little bro has his good looks. How about we set you on some blind dates? Does that sound good?" They both suggested.

Lord have mercy on my soul. Gaara better say no. He'll say no... Right?

"I'm confused, why are you both telling me this right now?" Why is gaara being so clueless right now? but you wouldn't blame him. You had no clue why they are forcing a marriage he doesn't want. You still had some questions about that.

- "The reason we're telling you this is because you missed yesterday's meeting, we overheard a conversation from two council members and me and kankuro insisted on telling you"

Wait... Were they talking about that meeting that gaara cancelled? You really hope it wasn't that meeting that gaara didn't go to. Only you and gaara know the real reason why he didn't show up to that meeting yesterday. It was safe enough to say that it was your fault it happened because you pulled away from him right when you both were about to kiss, and that drove him crazy to the point it led to him locking the door and aroused you just enough to get you moaning his name while riding his dick. You could already feel the flashbacks racing through your head.

How could he be some calm about this? He looks completely normal while you were over here in a sweating mess with a red look on your face, and this new emotion you were feeling. It was indescribable it didn't feel like anger nor sadness. It was something else that you have never felt before. It just felt so strong and you only felt this towards gaara.

"So we'll ask this again, are you seeing anyone?because that will be your ticket out of the arranged marriage and other stuff that comes with it" Kankuro asked, but yet gaara still remained silent again, no answer as the first time they had asked. If situations were reversed and they were asking you then you'd probably wouldn't know how to answer them either. You actually wouldn't know how to respond to that question too.

- "Well I'm not sure how to explain it, or what we are currently now and I can't discuss things with her at the moment because she's refusing to talk to me" He said with a calm voice, or rather to say it sounded like he was pissed with you for not talking to him.

You knew really well that hes talking about you, there wouldn't be a doubt in the world that he was talking about you. It wasn't that you're refusing to talk to him or anything. It's just that you don't know how to act or talk to him the same way after you both clearly fucked in his office and it led all the way to his apartment, and you were still processing the fact that he said that he loves you. Yeah you never forgot about that. That will be a locked memory forever. (Not to mention that temari and kankuro are currently in his office and you don't want them thinking that it was you who he was talking about just yet)

"So you have someone in mind but you and this mysterious girl of yours that you never mentioned once to me, have to talk things through? Am I missing anything else or is it just that? " Said kankuro with a confused look on his face.

Well if kankuro says it like that then yes, gaara fortunately has to talk things through with his 'mysterious girl'.

"So who is this girl that you're seeing? What's her name? Is she pretty? How old is she? Not to rudely ask but its because it's really rare to find girls in suna that are your age these days" Temari and kankuro asked so many questions with a curious tone. Already overwhelming the young kazekage with their countless questions they had for him.

Yeah you figured that they would be asking questions similar to that. Who wouldn't? People would obviously be really curious who gaara's secret lover is. The girl who is brave enough to fall in love with a man like gaara.

"It really isn't that important right now, I have a whole lot of work to do and you both are clearly distracting me" He said while he went back to sorting a few papers that were scattered around his desk.

Well that was one way to tell them to go away, but his version sounded a bit more harsh. But he had a reason to, they were all up in his personal business, asking such questions about his secret lover. Which you aren't going to be a secret any longer because it's going to be revealed either way. And you were ready for that time to arrive. But at the same time you were scared about what the people would think, especially your family. Would you think that they'd be okay with you marrying the kazekage and having kids together? Yeah obviously they're going to make a big deal out of it.

"Alright then, We could meet up together at a cafe to get through some things, thats if you have time. We'll just wander around the village for a little while because I haven't been here In months"

It was true, temari had been away for months, visiting konoha and actually stayed there for quite some time and never really came back here so often, but she had explained that she just wanted to see her brothers again, and probably hang out with them, well that's if they had time to spare. Which you already knew that gaara was definitely gonna be busy today.

While gaara was trying his best to get them to leave, you were already gonna notice how awkward it will be when you both are alone in a quiet room. And when you're both alone, it's obvious that he's gonna try talking to you. But you weren't worried about that right now, all what was in your head was the arranged marriage. Just picturing him and his new wife getting married and having a kid together.

You started to wonder how would it work out, if he ever were to marry another woman. How beautiful she would probably look, how perfect she is while standing next to gaara.

There it was again, it had been a long time since you doubted yourself, criticizing your own appearance. This new woman that probably going to marry gaara will look more pretty than you or rather more important since the council will choose her. All the things you could do, she could probably do them ten times more better. And what if gaara actually says yes... Will he just toss you aside and forget that he ever loved you? The woman that the council picks, what if he falls in love with her more than you.

Will he just sleep with another person and find out that she pleases him more than you ever could. What if he accepts the marriage and will just see you as his assistant once more? You just had so many questions but you'll just have to accept his decision, either he finds someone himself or let the council find someone for him. It's all his choice and you'll respect it even if he'll end up with another.

You were just sitting there and staring at a Paper and didn't even notice that temari and kankuro were calling your name to grab your attention so many times.

"EARTH TO Y/N! are you there?" You jumped a little and responded so quickly. "Yes sorry, I'm just a bit tired and hot that's all" You really couldn't make anything up at the moment so that was always your number one excuse and yet you still tend to get away with it.

"Me and kankuro are about to leave, you wanna come with us so you could get some air or maybe walk around to relieve stress?" You remained silent for a few seconds to think. Looking at gaara for a quick moment and then back at temari. "Um... I actually have to help gaara get caught up with everything since there were kids from the academy who just became genin recently and I want to help set up the teams"

You rarely ever decline her invites to something so it took her by surprise. But she kinda understood why you said no, because you were working now and you previously told her that you were trying to save up money to move out of your parent's home. So she just shrugged her shoulders and told you where she will be for the rest of the day if you get off work early. "Ok I was just a little worried, you just don't seem like your usual self today. Are you sure nothing's wrong? Because it feels like something happened to you, you sure you don't wanna talk about it?"

Yeah she was kinda right about that. Everything that happened last night really seemed to affect you more. Gaara confessed his love for you, which no one in your entire life had ever made you feel the way he did. It was obvious that you had fallen in love with him too, but you questioned that you'll ever be good enough. But having sex with him, TWICE. Really seemed to answer your big question.

"No everything is just fine, I just have so much going through my head that's all" You responded with and weak smile. Temari obviously knew that you were hiding something because she had been your best friend for year's and was practically your sister. So she knows when you lie and when you try to hide something that was serious. Believe me, Sleeping with your best friend's younger brother (a.k.a the kazekage) was really something to hide knowing damn well that it if anyone knew, the rumors would spread all around the village in a snap of a finger, and your family would find out everything you had been doing for the past few months.

You wouldn't know what to do if one person knew about it, and that person happened to be temari. What would happen if she figured it out on her own? How would she feel about it? Would she still want to be your friend even after she finds out that you slept with her brother?

You were aching to tell her but then again you wouldn't know what she would do or respond. You looked down at a Paper and imagined all the terrible things she would do if she ever found out about you and gaara.

Temari started to get ready to leave after she was done discussing things with the young kazekage. She walked over to you and gave you a bear hug, acting like it would be the last time she'd ever see you. You won't really know that for sure but you hope she comes back sometime of the year when you're not busy. So you could hangout with her more like back then.

She opened the door and made her way out of the kazekage's building with kankuro.

Minutes after she left, you knew you were screwed because you were alone with gaara. You could still feel his eyes on your direction, looking at you and only you. Just him looking at you was more than enough to get you all nervous. Just frozen like a manikin, not knowing what to do. Why is he the only person that could get you all worked up like this? Of course having sex with him quite seemed to take a big effect on you the most, but it hasn't really given him the slightest bit of shame that he slept with someone who just turned eighteen two months ago.

From what you know, he didn't even bother to ask how old you were. All he needed from you was your consent and done, he fucked you. Then your horny ass begged for more and that's how you ended up in his place. Well to be exact, he asked and you blindly said yes, you couldn't refuse his friendly gesture which ended up with you being in bed with him.

So is it just gonna be like this forever? Him staring directly at you while you try your absolute hardest not to look back at him. This is going to drive you insane if this kept on going, all you thought about was how loud you moaned underneath him. It just took you by surprise that you'd actually make those sounds for someone. Those painfully embarrassing love making sounds. It's the fact that he heard every single one of them very clearly.

You just had to get out of this uncomfortable situation somehow. But the last time you walked away it didn't really end well. Maybe just do your job without talking to him I guess? You weren't really sure what to do yet, but it had to be something that didn't involve walking away from him because last time really pissed him off. And you learned your lesson not to do that again.

But it just felt like walking out of this office was the only choice you had. Probably it would help you think better and for you to calm down. But you just needed to organize some papers into a folder and handing it to the kazekage before doing so. And that's what you began to do, gathering important information and placing them in their proper places.

It was a nervous walk heading to his desk and handing him the folder, your mind was racing and your heart was beating uncontrollably in your chest, but your face didn't seem to have much reaction. Your feet couldn't bring you closer to him but they brought you close enough in front of his desk to hand him the folder.

"What's that?" He asked. You weren't sure if he was upset about something or it's just his normal everyday tone. You couldn't tell the difference anymore so you just guessed that he didn't sleep enough, and you're to blame for that. "It's the folder that you asked me to organize yesterday, I didn't get to finish it since.... Well um... Things got personal between us" And there it was again, you couldn't keep a straight face and instead your face was flushed red in embarrassment.

You couldn't even look at him, just one glimpse of his gorgeous face and you're just gonna faint on the floor. So making eye contact was the last thing you wanted to do.

He grabbed the folder from your hands and opened it, and he immediately remembered when he asked you for it. "Oh, thank you" He said as he continued to finish a stack of papers. You nodded and turned around to head to the door very slowly. Why is everything so awkward? Last night he said that he loved you and you can't even look at him. Is it just gonna be like this for the rest of your life or what?

Before reaching for the door handle, you heard him call your name and it caused you to freeze like a statue. "Y/n before you walk away from me again, can you please come here?"

'Oh shit....' as much as you wanted to leave, you just can't bear to walk away. The way he said it, it was like he was pleading you to stay. That wave of guilt start to flare inside you, you really had no choice but turn around and walk back to him. Would it count as disrespect if you just walked away from the kazekage after he asks you to stay with him? You let out a sigh and turned back around, walking behind his desk and stood there at a safe distance. Your eyes were staring down at your feet, still refusing to look at him. You didn't even know the reason why you couldn't look at him anymore, you just couldn't. It felt as if you were mad but you knew you weren't.

He reached towards you gently held your hand, brushing his thumb over your knuckles, calling your name to get you to look at him. "Y/n my love, is something troubling you?" His soft voice that was filled with concern, as much as you want to tell him. You just couldn't find the words to express how you felt. "Are you angry with me? Did I... do something wrong?" It felt as if your heart coiled into a ball, seeing how worried he was. That look on your face, in his eyes it looked as if you were mad at him because of something he might've done wrong. "I-im not mad at you or anyone.... It's complicated and I don't know how to say this" You took a deep breath, finding words to express your strong emotion you were feeling.

Wiping a tear from your eyes that were about to run down your cheek. Lord Jesus why are you about to cry? But it just couldn't be helped, it would be half percent chance that you would lose him completely to random woman who would claim to love him forever. He just confessed his love for you yesterday and now you're about to lose him for good. "Y/n please tell me what's wrong, it hurts me to see you like this"

"Gaara....i just don't want to lose you, are you going to agree with the arranged marriage?" You spoke softly, as you already built the courage to look up at him. His eyes soften as he realized the reason you were upset. "Y/n... Would you honestly think that I'd agree to marry another woman knowing that I'm deeply in love with you? Other than temari and kankuro, you are all I have"

He pulled you closer to give you a hug, burying his face in your chest. Feeling how your breathing started to calm down. "But what if you did agree to the marriage? What then? Would you just toss me aside and forget all this ever happened?" He was just shocked with disbelief. Of what you said, he looked up at you and seen that there was a serious look on your face. "Y/n... Do you honestly think I'd want to marry someone else? Have a family with another woman that I don't know? You're the only one for me, and if you're okay with it then I'd choose you"

You could tell he was being serious of what he just said. That same look on his face when he confessed his feelings for you. That's when you know he was telling nothing but the truth. But another side of you believed that he was lying, a voice in your head telling you not to grow attached to gaara or else when you fully trust him he'll just leave you in an instant. And you tried your hardest to ignore that voice, which happened to be your newfound fear. The fear of losing the person that you love the most.

He stood up from his chair to give you a proper hug, holding you very tightly in his arms. Just the sight of seeing you like this really hurt him so much. He noticed how temari and kankuro's bad news really seemed to affect you more than it did to him. Yet he found it so cute how you're crying while holding onto him. He heard you mumble to yourself quietly but he didn't seem to give much attention to that. Just taking in the sight of how you crumble apart in his grasp. Feeling how you gasp while you try to soothe your breathing. "Are you alright y/n?"

You nodded and looked up at him as there were still tears running down your cheeks. A smile painted across your face as you felt relieved and fully convinced that he wouldn't leave you. "I'm fine" but he didn't believe you, he could still see it in your face that you were badly hurt. "I will never leave you, you understand me? I love you with all my heart and it still feels weird to share my emotions with another" he softly spoke, lifting your chin with two fingers to look up at him since you turned your gaze elsewhere.

Making eye contact with him still messed with your head. Just staring into his seafoam eyes still gave that little flutter in your stomach.

It still gave you goosebumps of how his soft palms were against your cheeks, cupping your face. Wiping away your dried tears with his thumbs. It just felt so relaxing, Knowing that someone cared for you that deeply. This type of love was so heartwarming. Most of all it felt safe and you thought you would never feel this way for someone.

"Y/n I love you with all my heart, do you love me too?" you remained silent for a few seconds, just every time he says that he loves you, it gives you a gush of happiness. Your face flushed with red as you responded quietly, "yes gaara, I love you too". His eyes softened and leaned closer to your blushing face. You could even say that it was red like his hair, because it was.

His soft lips close to yours, you could tell he was getting closer for a kiss. Kissing was still not a normal occurrence that happens to you, and your mind (that was extremely flustered) was still getting used to the weird feeling of physical contact with another.

You just got so addicted to the feeling of his soft lips against yours. Your mind still gets so hazy when his tongue swirls inside your mouth, dancing around with yours as a little bit of drool leaks from the corner of your mouth. It just felt like heaven when he kisses you like that. His hands that were on your cheeks, moved down to your waist and hugged your lower back while your arms were wrapped around his neck.

You let out a light moan while you both were kissing, you didn't think much if it so you just continued to kiss him back, your heart beating so fast because of the sweet kisses he was giving you.

He broke the kiss and looked at you for a moment. Looking at your cute features, seeing what a blushing mess you were in his arms. In his eyes, to him it looked adorable seeing your cheeks flushed with red. Seeing how flustered you were. It just made him happy that someone else felt the same way, how this type of love affected you in the most humorous ways. He just couldn't help but smile, knowing that the person that truly loves him is standing in front of him.

He began to shift his direction where your back was slightly pressed against the edge of his desk. And started to kiss you again, but this time it felt different somehow. This kiss kinda felt oddly familiar, like you and him had kissed like this before. The more you kissed him, the more you had realized why it felt like this. Feeling how heavy his breathing was, and the way his hands slided up and down over your curves. You knew that the kiss soon became heated and you had to find some way to stop it before things got out of hand. So this time you broke the kiss and paused for a little while, waiting to see if he had calmed down.

But the opposite seemed happen, he was just nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. Kissing your clothed shoulder and all the way to your jaw. You just stood there with no expression on your face, letting him flood your face with his passionate kisses.

He eventually stopped and looked down at you with those lust filled eyes. You could tell what he wanted but you weren't so sure if this was the right time to do so. It was in the middle of the day and that's when people start walking around and being active, not to mention the countless times when they randomly barge in the office and sometimes they'd scare you half to death.

And you remembered that you seen how many people were in the building, there wouldn't be a doubt in the world that one person would be knocking on the door. "Gaara I don't think this is the right time, maybe later okay?" You lightly patted his chest and smiled so awkwardly, trying to leave but he had a firm grip on your waist that prevented you from moving. Was he really being serious right now? By the look on his face, it seemed like he was.

His hands lowered down to the back of your thighs and began to lift you up. Making you sit down on his desk, his hands on your sides while you both started another make out session. Wrapping your legs around his hips as he pulled your body closer to his, feeling his erection press against your inner thighs. He was indeed turned on, and you can say that it was kinda your fault since you literally cried in his arms in fear of losing him and claimed that he would leave you for another woman, which he assured you that he wouldn't.

He broke the kiss and went down to your neck that was slightly covered from the collared shirt you were wearing. It didn't seem to bother him but he was starting to question why you were wearing collared shirts all the sudden. "It's really hot today, why are you wearing this?" Was he really being serious right now? Was he really this clueless? Did he not remember what he did to you? How could you say that it was because he literally marked up your entire right shoulder with hickeys in the most noticeable spots? "Well gaara, you're the reason why I'm wearing this" You responded with a low tone in your voice.

He looked at you all confused and it took him about a few minutes to realize what you meant as in it was his fault. He looked at a hickey that wasn't covered up and lightly touched the purple spot on your neck. "Does it hurt?" He said with a worried tone in his voice, already feeling guilty of what he did to you.

"Don't worry about it, it doesn't hurt" you responded and assured him that they didn't hurt you. He still wasn't sure if hickeys hurt but yet he remembered that he gave you a whole bunch of them on your shoulder and remembered that he bit you, "Are you sure that they don't hurt? I just don't want them hurting you and you're lying to me about it" He said in a low voice. You slightly chuckled at the sight of him being so worried for you. "Yes gaara, I'm telling you the truth, they don't hurt I promise" you said softly.

He was a bit hesitant to kiss your neck so he avoided the hickeys and kissed the other side of your neck that didn't have any. So he could feel more comfortable kissing you knowing that you weren't feeling any discomfort.

Your body calmed down and began to feel relaxed but your mind was still fixed on other things like the door, thinking that someone might come through the door at the wrong time. Just the thought of someone coming through that door as you are sitting on his desk. Just the gush of embarrassment it'll be when they walk in on the both of you doing lewd things to each other in the kazekage's office.

He was just busy covering your face with his sweet and soft kisses as he tries his best to comfort you, while you're over here worrying about the damn door. Of course he wouldn't care that if someone knows about you and gaara being together but it's different about you. Mostly everyone in this building has some close connection towards your father and if anyone knew that you were doing something wrong in the office then they'd obviously tell him. Your career would literally be ruined if he ever found out that you have been doing unspeakable things with the kazekage.

"Please calm down y/n, I'm sure that no one will walk in" he said in a soothing voice to ease your nerves that would take a lifetime to calm your nerves. Maybe he was right, you needed to relax since you were fully convinced that gaara wouldn't leave your side no matter what, but that fear of someone walking in still seemed to be in the way of you being comforted by your ‘boyfriend’.

Well you still weren't sure what you both are yet since you both didn't really get to that conversation yet, but most definitely you two aren't friends since friends don't do things like what you and gaara are currently doing. Like his hands are caressing your sides as you both give each other tender kisses.

Yeah maybe he was right that you needed to calm down a bit. You just felt so tense from last night and still had so many memories rushing through your mind and it really overwhelmed you in the past few hours. And just the thought of him marrying someone else made it even worse for you, and now he's just trying his best to make you feel better. Since it really hurt him for the first time seeing you cry about losing him.

His hands slowly lowered down to your thighs, his fingers almost underneath your skirt but where it didn't really discomfort you in any way. Although feeling his fingers slightly digging underneath your skirt gave you a little shiver down your spine. It wasn't like you haven't felt it before, it just left your mind all fuzzy and your body completely still. It was like you were completely lost under his touch, even though he wasn't doing anything unusual yet but it was still enough to mess with your head.

You could still feel that bulge in his pants that was growing a little more hard as you both kept kissing each other. As much as you tried not to let it get out of hand, you just couldn't seem to refuse him. It was like your body craved him again as if last night wasn't enough for you. But if it did happen then you wouldn't know if you'd be focusing on the pleasure or just the fear of someone walking in as it happens.

Just then, you could feel his hands slide under your skirt slowly. Already intertwining his fingers to the waistband of your underwear. You could tell that he wanted you now but you weren't so sure that it was the right time to do so. Just as you said before, it was the middle of the day so everyone is walking around in the building. You knew something like this would happen ever since you asked him if he would accept the marriage that the council would arrange for him. You knew he was being serious about it, just by the feeling of his breathing getting heavy as he grows slowly impatient.

The feeling of his fingers getting closer to your heated core, leaving you in complete shock as he slightly moans during the kiss. His fingertips now softly stroking your clothed folds, already creating a damp spot through the thin fabric of your underwear. He was already turning you into a complete mess, you were panting as he was softly stroking you, the pads of his fingers moving up and down and circled your clit. You knew that you both shouldn't be doing this now but he was the one that was in control and if you both needed to stop you weren't sure if you wanted him to.

He eventually broke the kiss so that the both of you could take a moment to breath properly since the both of you had been kissing for a long while. The movements of his fingers had also stopped, causing you to let out a little whine which he heard it loud and clear. He looked at you, just to make sure that you were okay but all he saw was pure lust in your eyes. The feeling of how you were gripping his shirt very tightly, begging him to keep touching you. He was seeing that your behavior was similar to last night, how you were desperately begging him to touch you again. "please gaara... Keep going" You said in a whining voice, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him closer to you for another kiss.

He removed his hands from underneath your skirt and they went back up to your waist. His hands were gentle and soft, as if you were the most precious and fragile thing that has ever existed. You were very much sure that it was him that got you all like this.

He just started touching you and then gradually stopped, causing you to whine and beg for him to keep going, it just felt as if he wanted you to beg for him, like he was teasing you for his own satisfaction, But that look on his face it was like he has his reason why he had stopped.

He was just looking at you, scrutinizing every detail on your face, making sure that this was what you wanted but all he saw was this desperate need in your eyes. The sounds of your whining for more touch, you just needed him again.

He used a hand to push the stacks of papers which caused them to scatter all over the floor, and other objects that were in his way as well. And began to slowly push you backwards, laying your back on the surface of his desk. You still had your legs wrapped around his hips to keep them from hanging off the edge. Using your legs to pull him closer to you, forcing his erection to press against your clothed pussy so harshly. As you wrapped your arms around his neck for another breathtaking kiss.

He let out a breathy groan from the friction of pleasure as he grinded his hardened cock against you. But it only worked you up even more. It just made you more eager for him. "Gaara... I need you" Just the sight of how desperate you were for him, caused him to slightly chuckle but feel bad at the same time.

So his hands went back under your skirt, pushing your underwear to the side. And began to softly stroke your wet folds, and rubbed small circles around your clit. He only kept doing it for a short while until he was fully convinced that you were appropriately wet enough for him to do anything else. He slowly inserted a finger into your warm wetness as he looks up at you to see any sort of discomfort on your face. But all he saw was how red your face was, how your lips parted from the steady pace his finger was going in.

It was sort of humorous for him to watch that you were trying your best to hide your reactions, by covering your eyes with your forearm as a way to avoid eye contact with him while his finger rubs gently and slowly on your sensitive insides and his thumb was pleasuring your clit.

The feeling of how your plush walls were wrapped around his finger so tightly. How your juices started to soak his knuckles as his finger slowly settled a steady pace that didn't hurt you. You were indeed getting wetter still, you just needed him again and you were beginning to grow tired of waiting. "G-gaara please... I need you now" You said in a pleading voice as you reached down and tugged on the buckle of his pants.

He sighed, as he slowly removed his finger from your wet heat. and began to unbuckle his pants, pulling down his boxers and letting his painfully hard cock be free from its clothing, already seeing his pre-cum leaking from the tip. He stroked himself a few times before lining it up to your aching hole. You already had that same flutter in your stomach, the same exact fluttering sensation you felt before it happens like the first time you both had done it.

He positioned the head of his cock at your wet entrance, looking at you to see if you had any second thoughts before he starts, because he doesn't want to start not knowing that you weren't ready anymore. He was only seeing your chest breathing heavily, and your eyes were fixed down at gaara's hand that was holding his veiny dick. You looked up at him, wondering why he hasn't started yet. But you knew why he was being hesitant, he was making sure your consent was correct, that you actually wanted it.

"Y/n are you ready?" Asking in a soothing voice, waiting for a response which actually didn't take that long since you responded with an eager nod. "Yes gaara, I'm ready" you responded as you repositioned yourself to get more comfortable on the rough surface of his desk; with your legs still firmly around his waist, locking your ankles together to prevent them from sliding down.

He nodded and focused down at your little entrance that was beginning to stretch while he pushes himself inside you with ease. Witnessing his pink sensitive tip disappearing into your wet hole. You arched your back as his tip had already made it past your wet opening. Already feeling the short numbing pleasure as he enters inside your warm walls. But you felt that he stopped halfway since he thought he was hurting you.

Seeing that your mouth was being covered by your hands and your eyes started to water as you closed them shut. But it took him a second to realize that you were just trying your best to suppress your moans.

But all that came out were just small whimpers and sighs of pleasure. So when he was sure that you were fine, so he continued on pushing the rest of his length inside your warmth. Causing him to let out a small grunt as he was now fully inside you. Letting you catch your breath before he was going to do anything else, you were really trying your best to keep quiet since it was the middle of the fucking day and you didn't want to attract attention from others who are walking in the hallway.

He placed his hands on his desk, his upper half hovering over you where his face was nearly close to yours. His messy red hair now damp with his sweat as he slowly began to rock his hips into yours, already finding a steady pace that pleasured the both of you.

He started nice and slow because he didn't want you making any noises other than the muffled moans you were making from his long thrusts. You just felt like screaming from the top of your lungs when his tip started to brush against one of your sweet spots. But you knew that you both would get caught if you made a moan that echoed across the room.

You had one hand covering your mouth and the other was to grab basically anything that was closest to you, which happened to be one of gaara's arm sleeves. He couldn't help but smile softly, seeing the way you crumble apart underneath him, seeing little tears prickling in your eyes as your cheeks were flushed with red, in his eyes you just looked so cute being all flustered like this, to the point you couldn't even make eye contact with him. It just felt like you were losing yourself at each thrust from gaara.

Your eyes were completely shut due to the high pleasure he was giving you, but you knew that you started to feel his hands over your stomach, trailing them up to your neck but he never slowed his pace. So you slowly opened your eyes to see what he was doing, and suddenly you just froze with your eyes just staring down at his hands as they progressively move downwards. Was he... Was he trying to get your completely naked in his office right now?

Already seeing your bare chest as he continues to unbutton your shirt. You didn't even know how to respond to this. You were just laying there motionless, watching him as he exposes your upper half. Making you feel a little more vulnerable, all what was left was your bra but he just decided to leave it on.

"I just thought that you might be a little hot, since your kinda sweating a bit and we have been at it for almost ten minutes." He said with a reassuring look on his face as he begins to look away since he might've thought that you were uncomfortable with him looking at you in this position you were currently in. You couldn't help but blush at his kind gesture, letting out a small laugh between the heavy breathing and tiny moans you were making.

"Well thank you gaara, it was very nice of you." You said as you tried to get gaara to look at you again. Your hands moving up to his face, cupping his cheeks and forcing him to look at you. His seafoam eyes now looking down into yours, bringing him down to kiss you. The feeling his soft lips dancing around with yours was just one of the best things you started to love doing with him.

Just then, you could feel his dick starting to twitch as he began to fasten his pace. You knew that he was beginning to feel how your walls started to tighten around him. He broke the kiss and closed his eyes very harshly, preparing for his release that wasn't going to take much time on waiting. Your hands gripping his shoulders, while he firmly holds onto your small waist to prevent any movement from you. He knew that he was close, and that you were too.

Feeling that churning sensation in his lower abdomen that signaled to him that he would not last much longer. He had something to tell you but he didn't have the words to express to you on how he felt. So he just said whatever came to mind, "y/n, do you.... Do you love me?" He asked as he slowly made eye contact with you in the most awkwardly way.

Your mind was hazy and you indeed loved him with all your heart, finding the right words in your head to find the perfect response. "Yes gaara, I love you. Why do you ask?" you said so curiously, looking at him in a confused look on your face. He didn't know what to say next, but that question that he still hasn't asked you yet, his mind was racing and his heartbeat pulsing quickly in his chest. You were right there, he couldn't dare to lose the opportunity to ask the question that was beginning to taunt him if he didn't ask you now.

"Y/n..." He said so softly, which was enough to pull your attention to his flustered face. "Gaara, is there something you need to tell me?" you asked with a confused tone in your voice, you were obviously starting to get worried about him. "Y/n, if you truly love me then.... B-be my wife.... Live the rest of your life with me" He said with a hesitant voice, seeing the look on your face when he finally said what he had been wanting to ask you.

"Be the mothe-- mother of my child, y/n" He said in a soothing voice as he was seeing a different kind of tears rushing from your eyes. His gaze trailing down to your stomach that was dripping from your sweat. One of his hands gently rubbing it as he was already picturing your little tummy swollen with his child.

Your heart was aching, as if it was on fire. And that flutter in your stomach seemed to grow more and more. Did he...just ask you to marry him?! Like just now?? You couldn't think straight because of his question that was now replaying in your head. You really didn't know how to respond to such question, he began to notice that you were extremely quiet, with no response. And was beginning to over think was he just asked you just now. He didn't know what to say next but he was starting to feel your soft walls clench around him as your grip on his shirt tightened. Which his release came right after, hot streaks of cum coating your insides white.

You both caught your breaths, as both your bodies slowly started to calm down. But gaara didn't seem to move off of you just yet, it looked as if he was still waiting for your response. Looking into your eyes that were soaked from the amount of crying for the past fifteen minutes, your face flushed with red. He tucked some of your hair behind your ear to get a more clear view of your face.

"Well y/n, what do you say?" He asked with a smile on his face.

"Will you be my wife?"

437 notes · View notes

shurisneakers · 3 years

Text

harmless (xvi)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader)

Warnings: cursing, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader, obnoxious flirting, guns and stuff

Word count: 6k

A/N: i don't even know what's written here. I'm so tired hank you to @spiderrpcrker for the phineas and ferb episode about peter the panda that inspired this chapter, that one anon for the wrong name calling, the anon who asked about the dundundun and everyone who wanted jealous bucky lol If you want more nonsense, you can head on over to Harmless Mini Drabbles :))

Previous Part || Series Masterlist

For what was considered the world’s largest security organisation, S.H.I.E.L.D. spent an inordinate amount of effort into picking the worst possible waiting room music of all time.

If Bucky heard the same damn one-hit-wonder jingle he had been hearing for the past three hours, he was going to throw his phone across the room. He knew the tune by heart, could hum it in his sleep and hell, if you gave him a piano he’d probably be able to recreate it note for note.

“Good morning, you’ve reached S.H.I.E.L.D. How may I help you today?”

“Linda, it’s me.”

“Sergeant Barnes,” she sighs with the fatigue of a woman who had dealt with too much from him in the past week, “Director Fury isn’t in yet.”

Bucky pinches the bridge of his nose, turning his chin up to the sky in thinly veiled frustration. “Did he tell you to tell me that?”

“That’s classified information, sir.”

“Linda,” he repeats her name, hoping it’d help him bypass at least eight security protocols, “I’m just gonna call again. Neither of us want that.”

It strikes a chord. Probably not because he said her name but because this was the third time that day he was calling.

Linda says slowly, “He told me to tell you to leave him alone.”

“I would if he just answered me,” he mumbles. “Tell him it’s important.”

“I did.”

“Tell him it’s really important.”

“I did.”

Fury, you son of a bitch.

“Have a good day, Linda.”

“You too, Sergeant.”

Bucky’s screen opens back up to the last place he left off an hour ago. You were no stranger to this man leaving you on ‘read’, more often than not because you’ve said something stupid.

From Villain(ish) Your place or mine? ;) A few things haven’t changed, clearly. The message was a damn throwback; he can remember the vivid details of the last time it happened too. To Villain(ish) mine

But a few things have changed.

He can see the chat bubble appear and disappear several times. It brings a smug smirk to his face.

From Villain(ish) Stop it, you’re not supposed to flirt back

To Villain(ish) then stop hitting on me

From Villain(ish) Never

From Villain(ish) See you at my place ;)

From Villain(ish) The lair. I mean the lair.

From Villain(ish) Unless…

To Villain(ish) no

From Villain(ish) Fine, lair it is

“Y/N, the stupid light at the front’s blinking again,” Bucky calls out as he walks through the entrance, after spending nearly five minutes trying to figure out what’s wrong with it. “What’d you break now?”

What doesn’t surprise him is how the lair’s decked out today. There are several giant slabs of varying heights and widths, pristine white in colour. It’s arranged randomly on the ground like some sort of a maze or labyrinth.

“Hey, Bucky,” T waves from the raised platform at the end of the hall.

He lifts his gaze up to see you waving too, but your body was mostly hidden by the gigantic inator lying smack middle of the stage.

“T.” That’s what surprises him a little, however. “What are you both up to?”

“School’s out.” You pop your head out from behind the machine to grin, clapping your hands together. “Time for evil.”

Bucky’s nose scrunches. “What is this, an obstacle course?”

“No, it’s-” T opens her mouth to explain but you frantically wave your hand around to shush her.

“Don’t ruin it, I have a whole speech ready,” you cut her off with a small whine. “T’s here to assist me in taking you down today.”

“What leverage does she have on you?” Bucky asks her directly. T was the sensible one, he knows that for a fact.

“I said I’d pick her plans up from the store if she stopped me from flinging myself off a cliff,” T explains with a sigh.

“T’s cousin’s getting married, she needs to buy a lehenga.” You smile at her in excitement. T doesn’t look half as thrilled.

“I was just supposed to drop off some blueprints.” She looks at you in disdain. “I’ve been here for two hours.”

“It’s been two hours of non-stop fun.” You nudge her arm.

“We’re very different people.”

“Fine, whatever.” You huff. “But Jake’s here to help me.”

“She’s full of shit, Sergeant Barnes,” Jake pipes up from behind a large block somewhere towards the right side of the room. “Said I’d get out of cleaning for a week if I helped her put these stupid things up.”

“Hey, Jake,” Bucky calls out, wondering if his voice would carry over to where he was.

“You guys are the worst,” you say under your breath. “I’m taking back all the incentives I offered.”

“I’ll fuckin’ sue you if I have to,” your roommate responds, instead, very loudly. “You’re on dish duty, I’m not doing anything.”

“You’re not doing anyone either, asshole,” you fire back. “No wonder you’re so fucking uptight all the time.”

“Like you’re one to talk.”

“Can you both shut up.” T doesn't even put in the effort to ask. “Pack it up, Jake, we’re leaving.”

“Hold on, I’m coming.” Bucky hears a toolbox close shut before the guy emerges. “You better watch out, Y/N. I have a feeling one of these might accidentally fall on you. I hope no one’s left a few nails loose, just in case.”

“Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, Jake-ass.” You smile bitterly. “That’s if your massive fucking head lets you go through it in the first place.”

“Children, children, you’re both pretty.” T claps her hands loudly. “Can I please go home now?”

In a split second, her action sets off the loudest orchestral dun dun dun in the lair, massive enough to have the slabs themselves vibrating. It accompanies a heavy string of curses from the four of you after having scared you to half to death.

"Mother of God,” Bucky mutters. “I thought you had that thing removed.”

“So did I. '' You have one hand pressed against your chest to control your heart rate. “Maybe that’s why the light’s going off in the front again.”

“I’m never coming back here.” Jake shakes his head, following T to the door.

“No one’s asking you to, you fuck,” you shout to his back. “Remember to feed Alpine.”

“Remember to fuck off,” he returns, instead, keeping his eyes trained on Bucky as he approached the door. “Sergeant Barnes, always a pleasure.”

“Likewise.”

“Also, I think you left your beanie at the apartment the last time you came over.”

“That’s my beanie now, Bucky, you can’t have it back.” You lift your hand above your head to grab his attention. “Finders keepers.”

Fair enough.

“I was supposed to tell you something.” T pauses as she walks past him.

“Dinner at your place this Friday,” Bucky suggests. As if her boyfriend would let him forget it.

“That.” She snaps her finger in realization. “Jake you’re invited, too.”

“Is Dexter’s Lab back there coming too?” Your roommate points back at you with his thumb.

“I’m her best friend, you imbecile.”

“In that case, I’m not-” Jake begins but T just shoves him out the exit.

The door closes noisily, leaving you both in only a second of silence before you skip down the platform. Bucky watches you snap a cardboard party hat on your head and a grin on your face as you meet him midway.

“Bucky Barnes.” There’s also a little birthday horn-kazoo type thing in your hand. He isn’t really sure what they’re called other than the ‘thing you find under your couch a month after your party’.

“Nemesis,” he replies casually, a smile on his face.

“Husband,” you chortle, stopping a few feet in front of him. “Are you aware what day it is?”

“Saturday.”

You raise a finger to your hat pointedly. “No, genius.”

“It ain’t your birthday, I know that.” He arches an eyebrow. “Is it Alpine’s?”

“It’s our year-iversary.” You blow the kazoo. It unrolls too damn long and almost hits him in the face. “365 days since you kicked down my door like an absolute primate.”

“Oh.” He blinks. Had it been a fucking year already?

“You forgot, didn’t you?”

Bucky rubs the back of his head sheepishly, and mouths off a quick apology. He was better with names and faces.

“It’s fine, I know you're not one for dates,” you say quickly, throwing a folded party hat at him which he grabs deftly. "Explains why you've never asked me on one."

He was working on it.

Or at least he could, if the guy he needed to talk to just picked up the fucking phone-

"I’m kidding,” you emphasize when he seems to zone out. You might have been, but he wasn’t. “Before I try to kill you today, I thought we’d celebrate one year of you and I fucking shit up together.”

One year somehow felt a lot longer and shorter at the same time.

“So, I made a compilation of our greatest hits.” You pull a remote out of your lab coat pocket. “Added a background track and everythin’.”

“Where’d you get the footage?” he asks finally, playing with the string of the cardboard hat. He wasn’t entirely sure it’d fit his head, but maybe it didn’t need to be secured.

“Many, many places.” A smile curves onto your face slowly. “You’ll see.”

With that, you spin around to the TV sets and click a button on the remote.

Nothing turns on.

A small frown appears on your face as you press it with your index finger again. No change.

“Excuse me,” you say to the remote, pressing the button down even harder. It doesn’t budge.

Finally, you resort to the tried and tested method of slamming the back of it against your palm a few times to get it to work again. Big mistake.

The excruciatingly loud soundtrack blasts through the lair again, leaving the slabs rocking again.

“Are you fucking ki-” You jump for the second time, swearing loudly at the speakers.

Bucky’s too busy peering at the now ruined party hat in his hand, crumpled by the force of his hand clamping down on it. “You need to switch that thing off right no-”

“I didn’t turn it on in the first pla-”

A deafening bang from the entrance cuts him off. The world’s just full of loud noises today, wasn’t it.

Both of you turn your heads towards the door simultaneously.

Another large thud against it has the metal trembling in its frame.

“Is that another defect or what?”

“No, I have no idea what it is.” Your eyebrows furrow together. “Maybe that’s why the light’s on.”

“Is your lair going to self-destruct-”

The loudest bang so far and what sounds suspiciously like a gunshot finally has it click in his head.

“Someone’s trying to break down your door,” he observes helpfully.

“How would you kno- oh, I forgot you have plenty of experience with that.” You send him a momentary glare but he doesn’t seem too invested in that.

“Stay here,” he instructs, squaring his shoulders and slowly making his way to the entrance.

“It might be the kidnappers again, Bucky, they’ve been saying they’re gonna make a return soon,” you call out. “If it is, tell ‘em to fuck off.”

“What?” He stops, hand resting on the doorknob. “Since when have they been sayin’ that?”

“We’ll talk about that later,” you insist, shooing him towards the door. “If you get hurt, I’m gonna kill you.”

Bucky rolls his eyes with a smile. It drops from his face abruptly when the door quakes again but this time, he’s swift to yank it open the instant the intruder slams against it.

The person on the other end nearly stumbles forward but Bucky pushes the door close again, effectively shoving him back to his place, leaving it a quarter of a way open.

He springs to his feet with a gun raised but Bucky’s metal arm reaches out and clasps around the barrel tightly. Even if he shoots, it’s no match against the strongest metal on earth.

“Who the hell are you?” Bucky’s voice is gruff.

“Who the hell- Sergeant Barnes?” The guy’s eyebrows furrow. His light blond hair is pulled away from his face, bright blue eyes attentive and quick to do a scan of the man holding onto his weapon.

“Who are you?” Bucky asks again, voice sharp.

“Agent 7.” The man doesn’t lower his gun. “I’ve been assigned to this case.”

“Say what now?” you cut in, immediately dissipating the tension in the air.

“Think you have the wrong address, I’m working this,” Bucky continues on, flesh hand behind the doorway furiously gesturing for you to stay back.

The guy shakes his head, shoulders relaxing slightly. “Direct orders from above, Sergeant. Got them this mornin’.”

“Does S.H.I.E.L.D. tell everyone to kick down doors? Is that, like, an essential part of hiring?” you begin, disregarding the glare that Bucky swiftly sends your way. “No, I’m serious. Why do you guys keep trying to break in like that?”

“Who gave you your orders?” Bucky asks sternly.

“Director Fury.”

Nicholas, you son of a bitch.

“So now I have two agents fighting over me?” You take a step forward. He can only imagine how massive of an ego fuel this would be.

“Fighting you, not fighting over you,” Agent 7 feels the need to point out, “and, I think it’s one of us. Sergeant Barnes, they said they sent you an email.”

Bucky whips out his phone and opens his app faster than he probably ever had before, metal hand still covering the gun.

From: [email protected]

New agent has been assigned to case no. 26102002. You are hereby instructed not to interact with the subject in any professional capacity.

“Hold on now,” Bucky looks up at the newbie after reading the stupid email thrice. “This is the first time I’m hearing of-”

“Am I really this popular?” you ask, wonder in your voice.

“Stop it, you’re not,” Bucky holds his hand out to prevent you from moving forward, enhanced hearing picking up your footsteps.

“I feel like I’m in a fanfic.”

“Do you require assistance, Sergeant?” The agent asks, looking over Bucky’s shoulder at you through the partly opened door.

“Elderly assistance, maybe.” You snort.

“No, I don’t.”

“I was just in the middle of trying to kill him, Agent.”

For the love of God.

“What?” Newbie asks Bucky.

“You’re welcome to join if you want,” you say, suddenly popping up over Bucky’s shoulder.

The man snaps his weapon back up and towards your face in an instant and you disappear behind Bucky again.

“Fuckin’ hell- put that gun away, 7.” Bucky shoves the barrel of the gun down. “Didn’t they brief you about this already?”

“Not really. I was just told to stop her from doing whatever she’s doing.”

“Yeah, well, she’s harmless.” Bucky releases his grip on the gun, instead, inverting and holding out his hand out for the weapon. “So we don’t really need any ammunition.”

“Hey!” you call out, offended.

“Hand over the gun, Agent,” Bucky repeats. “You can check with S.H.I.E.L.D. but they’re just going to tell you the same thing.”

The man stares intently at Bucky for a moment before making a judgement.

In the end, he hesitatingly complies and Bucky tosses the gun to the floor, kicking it far away from anyone’s immediate reach.

“What’s going on here?” Agent 7 inquires when Bucky finally steps aside to let him in.

“Extreme paintball!” you cheer. “Except if you get hit, you, y’know, disintegrate.”

“A disintegrator?” His voice raises a few decibels.

“Inator,” you add, completely unhelpfully. “Do you have another weapon, Agent?”

“I got a couple’a knives.” He glances down at his utility belt.

“That won’t do,” you tut disapprovingly. “I’m too good for that.”

“No, you’re not,” Bucky interrupts, turning to the agent again. “No, she’s not. Don’t use knives either.”

“I don’t take opinions from strangers.” You huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

Bucky halts his next move of asking the agent to hand over his knives.

“What’d you say?” He narrows his eyes at you.

“This man right here, Agent 11-” you point at the person in question.

“Agent 7,” Newbie pipes up.

“Agent 7,” you correct yourself, “is the man assigned to my case. I have no clue who you are.”

“Hilarious,” he says dryly. “Agent, I’m pretty sure this is a mistake. I’ll sort this out with S.H.I.E.L.D., but-”

“Hey, 7.” Agent looks up to see you a few feet away by the screens, pulling open one of the drawers. “Catch.”

You hurl a Nerf gun at him at full speed, whistling when he catches it with one hand even with the lack of time he had to react.

“How’d she get there so fast?” He looks at Bucky who just dismisses it out of hand in exasperation.

“I’ll make it easy for ya. Hit me with a dart and you win.” You jog a few steps over to the machine and grab onto the handlebars. “Alright, dude, you ready?”

Agent 7 looks at Bucky, knowing he could pull rank if he wanted to.

Bucky just sighs and mentions for him to go ahead. Guy had a job to do, he knew that. He wouldn’t come in the way of that.

“Just… avoid,” s the only advice he can offer.

The second his sentence leaves his mouth, there’s a loud whir of a machine and incoming zap before a slab reduces to a pile of ashes on the floor.

Agent 7 springs into action, sprinting behind the closest block. If Bucky was guessing, he’d say the guy intended to weave his way to the front methodically.

Bucky, however, stays rooted to his spot with a new purpose in mind. He pulls his phone out of his jeans again, dialling in a number he may as well have on speed dial at this point.

“I can see you hiding, agent,” you shout, firing at the block the guy had barely managed to shift from. “You’re gonna have to try harder.”

Novice.

Agent 7 does a quick sidestep, releasing a dart quickly. It narrowly misses your arm and you laugh, yanking the inator to cover your exposed side.

“Nice one,” you exclaim over the pew pews. “Pretty good shot you got there, 7.”

Hey now, since when were you on a complimentary basis with the guy you met ten minutes ago?

There’s a click from the other end of his call. Bucky’s attention snaps back to his phone.

“Linda, I swear if Fury-”

“Sergeant Barnes?” She doesn’t even sound surprised anymore.

“Don’t put me on ho-”

“Hold please, Sergeant.”

“For fuck’s sake,” he lets out in frustration when the dumb tune starts ringing again.

“Watch out, Sergeant Barnes.” Agent 7 does a tuck and roll in front of him.

Bucky only watches the man travel by his feet, still remaining unmoving from his spot.

“Yeah, watch out, Sergeant Burns,” you call out. “Agent 7, do you wanna be my new best friend?”

Bucky rolls his eyes.

“That’s unlawful, ma’am.” He fires a shot behind you. You yelp and duck.

That was the same damn issue Bucky had, which Nick could just resolve if he picks up the damn phone-

“I had a friend once.” You launch a shot and it nearly hits Bucky who still doesn’t shift from his place in the middle of the floor. “He was sent to stop me too, real grouch.”

“Quit talkin’ about me like I’m dead,” he says loudly.

“Sometimes I can still hear his voice,” you continue speaking. “I think his name was Jinky or something. Can’t remember.”

“Step away from the weapon, ma’am.”

“Agent, if you stick around long enough, I’ll make us a greatest hits compilation on our anniversary.” You ignore Agent 7.

Bucky scoffs, loud enough for you to hear him. “Real mature.”

“Sorry, John, did you say something?” you yell. “Can’t hear you over the sound of my new best friend running for his life.”

“We are legally not allowed to be friends, ma’am,” Agent 7 repeats in vain, pressing throwing himself to the wall for a second to get out of the way.

“Now I know that’s bullshit because my ex-friend Jones Bones and I were basically married.”

Jones fuckin’ Bones.

“Sergeant Barnes, are we allowed to be friends?” 7 asks, half-panting and wide-eyed.

“I suggest you focus on your work, Agent,” he says, tone wry.

“Don’t listen to him, bestie.” You pull his attention back to you. “You and I till the end.”

Bucky hears someone say something over the phone, and he plugs one finger into his ear to listen in.

“Linda, I don’t need to speak to Fury-”

“We hope you’re still with us! We’ll have you connected in a short while!” the automated voice says enthusiastically.

“Think fast, Agent!” Is followed by the sound of your ray hitting a giant slab in the middle of the room before it eviscerates into dust.

“Motherfucker,” Bucky curses at the voice recording.

The call returns back to the one-hit-wonder lobby music. Like that morning, Bucky wants to throw his phone at the wall.

He turns to the Agent who had landed right behind a slab only to have it disintegrate right before his eyes. He turns white as a ghost.

“You okay?” You lower the ray for a second in concern.

Agent 7 swallows thickly and nods.

“I think you scared the shit outta him.” Bucky looks at him.

“What’d you say, Barry?”

“Oh, fuck you.”

You grin before standing on your tiptoes to look for Agent 7 who had crawled his way to another block in the corner of the room.

“Agent 7, if you need a break you should let me know. I got some Gatorade.”

“You never asked me if I wanted Gatorade,” Bucky protests against the absolute injustice of it all.

“Hey, blondie,” you call out, “if you can hear anyone talk, just tell them I literally pulled out a ring box the second time we met.”

Bucky can see Agent 7’s leg disappear in a quick second behind a block. Poor guy had no idea what he was walking into today.

“There was no ring in the box.”

“Oh, sorry, getting picky now, are we, Becky?”

Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Hello,” the phone chirps again.

His eyes focus on the ground again as he presses it tighter to his ear.

“Jesus, hold on a se-”

“All our lines seem to be busy. We’ll connect you-”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Bucky mutters under his breath before hanging up the call and shoving his phone back into his pocket.

Hands on his hips, he does a quick survey of his surroundings. Most of the slabs were gone. He had the Agent’s location pinned down because of the shadow cast on the ground in front of him. You had taken a quick break to disintegrate the clock on the wall, just for the hell of it.

Bucky sighs before lifting his hands.

Two loud claps and the fucking orchestral theme quakes through the lair.

“Fucking Christ,” you almost screech, letting go of the inator as you stagger back.

He calmly saunters to where the Agent was on the ground, blinking at what just happened. Bucky offers him his grip, pulling him to his feet.

He presses his finger to his lips, mentioning for him to be quiet before raising his hands up again.

“Agent 7, that stranger is a terrible-”

Bucky claps one more time, louder than the last and the remaining slabs shake violently in their place as the dun dun dun goes off again.

“Stop fucking doing that, holy shit!”

“Wait here for a second,” Bucky instructs, “then go up the side. Along the wall, under the speaker in the right corner is the plug point. Just sever the wire.”

Agent 7 nods in a daze, before sneaking off according to Bucky’s instructions, trying his best to hide behind whatever giant obstacle blocks were still remaining.

Bucky steps out, palms raised in surrender. He looks at you up on the platform where you were still standing, hand on your knees as you bent forward to slow your heart rate.

“You gonna shoot me, sweetheart?” Bucky asks, a small smirk on his face as he casually makes his way up to you.

“I might,” you huff, tugging the inator towards him weakly. “You betrayed me.”

“I thought we didn’t know each other.”

“And you just confirmed that,” you mumble. “Traitor.”

He jogs up the stairs, and you twist your body to look at him, leaning on your inator with a reluctant smile on your face that’s only reserved for his idiocy.

“You okay?”

“I hate you,” you say instead.

“Feeling’s mutual.” His lips curve upwards. “Go easy on him, it’s his first day on the job.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you grumble. “Agent, you’re gonna need to get a sharper knife next time.”

Bucky looks over your shoulder only to see Agent 7 freeze for a second before starting sawing at the cable faster.

“You sure there’s gonna be a next time?” He returns his attention back to you.

“Well, you got fired from my case so I don’t see why not.” You cross your arms over your chest. “Right on our year-iversary too.”

“I didn’t get fired,” he says, disgruntled. “Pretty sure it’s a fuckin’ mistake.”

“Maybe we just aren’t meant to be,” you sigh heavily, before turning around. “You done yet, Agent?”

“Yes, ma’am.” 7 stands up straight, tucking his knife into the sheath on his thigh.

“You can leave for the day.”

An awkward silence soon follows. Agent 7 sets his gaze on the disintegrator, a crease between his eyebrows like he’s doing mental calculations.

“Just leave it, I’ll send it to HQ later,” you put the guy out of his confusion.

He doesn’t look entirely convinced, shooting a glance at Bucky who just reaffirms your statement with a nod.

“You can tell ‘em you completed the assignment.” Bucky feels sorry for him. He didn’t have to deal with a makeshift obstacle course and a disintegrator ray the day he met you; only sardonic remarks and meme references he got several months later.

“Sergeant Barnes. Ma’am,” he acknowledges before timidly turning on his heel to leave.

He occasionally throws glances back on his way out to see if you had any other plans he might not be privy to, but you just stand still, watching him with a raised eyebrow.

Agent 7 picks up his gun from the corner of the room before pulling open the door.

Bucky can see the Agent’s phone in his hand as he threw one last look back at you both. In the second before he shuts the door behind him, he raises his phone up to his ear to call who Bucky had no doubt was S.H.I.E.L.D.

“Your best friend’s gone,” Bucky notes.

“How? He’s right here.” You give him a big smile, nudging his foot with yours.

“Oh, so now we’re friends again.” He raises his eyebrows.

“Did we ever stop?”

He shakes his head, giving a small laugh in disbelief. “One year of this shit, huh?”

“I don’t think it counts as a year if he technically stopped me this time.” You click your tongue. “Such a shame, you were at the finish line too.”

“I don’t think he did anything.” Which was sort of true. To his credit, he did manage to keep you distracted enough for Bucky to make a useless call.

“Agent 11-”

“7.”

“Agent 7 was a worthy opponent,” you drawl.

“Right.”

“He was resourceful-” you count on your fingers as you go along- “smart. Totally cute.”

Bucky scoffs out a laugh. “Yeah, that sure helped.”

“It did, distracted me an’ everything.” You tug your arms across your chest defiantly. “I missed a few shots ‘cause I got lost in his baby blues.”

“Uh-huh.”

“You were just too busy being jealous to see it.”

Bucky narrows his eyes at that, entirely unamused.

“What, no clap back?” You snort when he doesn’t respond.

His eyebrow twitches involuntarily.

“Hold on- were you actually jealous?”

You’re holding back a laugh, he can tell. He, on the other hand, is not.

“You were, weren’t you?”

He doesn’t respond again.

Instead, when you finally meet his gaze, it’s so intense you wonder if you made a mistake asking. You can’t find it in yourself to look away.

Bucky takes a step towards you. He never breaks eye contact.

He leans in, agonizingly slow, only inches away from your face. Your breath hitches when his eyes flit downwards.

“No,” he whispers near your ear, voice a few octaves lower. His word tickles your skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

He hears you inhale sharply, and he pulls back with a smirk.

“You are-” you stammer, feeling the heat grow spread through your face- “that was completely unnecessary, Benjamin.”

He considers it payback for the several, several teleportation stunts you’ve pulled with him.

“Call me whatever you want.” He takes a step back. “Still doesn’t prove your point.”

Almost like it’s an in-built instinct, the only thing that tumbles out of your mouth is,

“How about I call you mine?”

You cringe. He, however, doesn’t flinch.

“Call me whatever you want,” he repeats, quietly and with a shrug.

You tilt your head at him, eyebrows slightly knitted together. He presses his lips in a straight line, trying to read your expression. The air’s shifted again and he feels strangely squirmish.

A small smile appears on your face. “How about Brick?”

Bucky had had enough.

With the undiluted purpose of man on a mission, he marches straight through the glass doors of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s headquarters in New York.

He stops only to press the button of the elevator, and taps his foot the entire ride at the stupid jingle that had annoyingly been playing on his mind the entire time over here.

He waits for others to exit before punching in the code, letting the system run a biometric and fingerprint scan to grant him access to the topmost floor of the building; a privilege only allowed for a certain set of people. That privilege would probably be stripped away after the stunt he was planning to pull.

“Fury,” Bucky says determinedly, pushing open the door with one hand and striding in.

“Shoulda known you’d show up here eventually.” The man spins around in his chair. “You’ve called my office twenty fuckin’ times in the last two days. She’s clearly had an influence on you.”

Maybe what he called persistence, others called irritation.

He was starting to understand your whole niche a little clearer now.

“Who is Agent 7 and why is he assigned to my case?”

Fury leans forward. “Ain’t that what you wanted?”

“I never asked for a reassignment,” he argues, not bothering to take a seat. “I’ve never even heard of this kid, who is he?”

“7 is one of our top recruits. If you have a problem with him, take it up with Hiring on the fourth floor. Now, if that’s it, stop fucking calling me-”

“That’s not what I called,” Bucky says brazenly. “I had a question.”

Nick’s face shows no change.

“It’s, uh-” Whatever vigour Bucky had when he marched into his office was gone. “It’s about this thing-”

He pauses. Opens his mouth and shuts it again, trying to frame the words correctly.

“Mother of God, it’s like listening to a fourteen year old,” Nick cuts him off. “I know what you wanted to ask. Romanoff asked me the same thing a few days ago.”

“She did?” Bucky clears his throat awkwardly, the potted plants in the corner of the office suddenly looking a lot more interesting.

“She didn’t say it was for you but it don’t take a genius to figure out that’s why you’ve been blowing up my fucking phone.” It’s not fair that Fury picked up Nat’s call just because she’s one of the only people he trusted in the world. “Did you a damn favour, too. You couldn’t even get through one sentence-”

“Alright,” he interrupts, feeling the familiar signs of embarrassment set in, “then why’d you take me off this assignment?”

“So that you don’t have professional obligations towards this,” he says slowly like Bucky’s stupid, which he probably is.

It takes him a second of plain staring before it hits him that it’s a favour. His moral dilemma about asking out someone he’s supposed to stop would be solved.

Still, Bucky is brave and Bucky is an idiot who likes to push his luck in the face of imminent death.

“What if I wanna continue this mission and do the other thing? At the same time?” A conflict of interest, for one.

“The line you’re treadin’ is pretty thin, Barnes,” Nick says, his glare still strong. Bucky’s not sure he’s blinked the entire time he’s been here.

Regardless of whether S.H.I.E.L.D. agreed or not, he was going to eventually do it.

He would rather not have to go through the legal system. Again.

“But, you're not violating any rules.” Nick leans back at last. “She’s still a consultant for us. Her contract just says we need someone to keep her in check so she doesn’t go buck wild, and you seem to be doing that just fine.”

“So, it’s not-” Bucky gestures around vaguely- “illegal?”

“No,” Nick says curtly. “It’s not. She’s not our enemy.”

The relief he feels is only second to the annoying bit of happiness that’s threatening to take over him like wildfire.

“So, it’s all good?” he asks, every word sounding more stupid than the last.

“You hunt aliens on a daily basis, you think I give a shit about who you’re dating?” Nick finally fires back. “Do whatever you want, Barnes.”

He expects half a lecture on not fucking up, or endearing citizens, or compromising but it never comes. Suppose Fury has more faith in him than he thought.

That’s all?

Motherfucker.

“Fury,” he says in a goodbye.

“Barnes.” The reply is immediate.

Bucky nods once seriously before stalking out the same way he came, albeit more awkwardly.

The ride down is a lot more quiet, given that he can’t really focus on the irritating song that’s playing. Instead, his face is turned towards the floor, a hundred different scenarios running through his head concerning a very specific topic.

However, before he leaves, he still has something to complete.

“Linda,” Bucky leans against the receptionist table.

The redhead looks up from her computer, no shift in her expression when she realises who it is. If anything, it only takes a turn for the worst. It’s well deserved.

“Sergeant Barnes, how good to see you,” she says dully. “Director Fury is-”

“I met him,” Bucky cuts in softly before she has to go through the ordeal of explaining the same thing again. “I’m sorry. Thank you for your patience.”

“That’s funny.” Her eyebrows pull together. “I was just going to say that he finally left you a message.”

She rips a sticky note off the telephone and holds it out to him to take.

Bucky silently complies in confusion.

‘Do anything stupid and I have at least six ways to have you killed within the hour.’

He doesn’t doubt it.

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#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #mcu fic #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #bucky angst #bucky barnes angst #harmless fic #winter soldier x reader #Winter Soldier #bucky barnes #bucky

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sapphosthoughtsandwritings · 3 years

Note

if it’s not too much to ask please please please could you write more avengers x teen!reader? I adore the one with fear of the dark and was wondering if you could do something similar? Like either the avengers comforting the reader or just something with lots of hugs and cuddles? Thank you!! <3

Stage Fright - Avengers x anxious!teen!Reader

Summary: When your presentation for class goes terribly wrong, your team mates come to rescue you and take you home.

Warnings: depictions of anxiety, panic attack, a few cuss words

Type: angst, ends with fluff

Word Count: ~2.5k

A/N: MY FIRST REQUEST, very exciting!! I am so so glad you liked my work, and I hope you enjoy this one as well!! <3 I also have quite a few more ideas for teen!Reader fics, so this definitely won't be the last piece like this!

(Y/l/n) = your last name

(f/d) = favorite drink

You’d been dreading this day for weeks now. Clutching the straps of your backpack, you let out a deep sigh, walking up to the doors of your school. You didn’t like school to begin with, but the building seemed much more intimidating today. Making your way through the halls, you were grateful that you got to school early, you hated pushing through crowds of people.

“Hey, hey (Y/n)!”, a voice called from down the hall. You recognized it almost immediately. “Hi Peter, what’s up?”. You were happy to see him, maybe talking out your nervousness would help. “Oh, you know, just the same old stuff. Sure am tired though”. “Well, if you don’t sleep then you will be tired”. “Like you’re one to talk (Y/l/n)”. You only rolled your eyes and stuck out your tongue at him, evoking a chuckle from him. “How about you? How are you doing?”. “Ugh, not great. I have to present that project today. Not particularly looking forward to it”, you huffed, looking down to the ground as your anxiety increased at the thought of presenting alone. “Hey, I’m sure you’ll do great. Most people don’t pay attention to presentations anyways”, he assured you. You popped your knuckles, still feeling just as nervous. You knew he was right, but that didn’t stop the fear surging through you. “Yeah, I know. I just don’t want to do it. Maybe if I wait long enough, there won’t be any class time left for me to present”, that was your hope, and your only plan to get out of this without panicking in front of the whole class. “Maybe, well regardless, I hope it goes well”, he offered you a sincere smile. “Yeah, I hope so too”. “Well, I should probably head to class, see you at lunch!”. “Right back at ya, Parker”, you waved gently to him as he disappeared down a hallway.

You made your way to your first class, deciding to read a bit before class started. Nothing you did eased the gnawing anxiety in the back of your mind though. Your first two classes were easy enough, but it was hard to focus, your mind racing with intrusive thoughts. ‘What if my voice gives out? What happens if I start crying in front of everyone? God, the whole school will hear about it. Everyone will stare at me, whisper about me every time I pass by them. I can’t do this, I just can’t’. By your third class, you’d bitten your nails down to blood, your lips suffering the same fate, cracked and split open. You almost considered skipping, but you’d worked hard on this project, you couldn’t let that go to waste. So, taking your seat in the back of the class, you tried breathing techniques, anything to help calm your senses. Your leg bounced so much, you swore the floor would give out under your foot.

The teacher turned out the lights, letting people present their projects voluntarily. You calmed the tiniest bit. If someone randomly kept volunteering to present, the class time was sure to run out before you even got the chance to stand up. Throughout the class, you were on edge, chanting silent prayers in your head. You weren’t very fortunate though, as everyone presented quickly, making it apparent that you were going to have to present no matter what. “Alright, who hasn’t gone up yet?”, your teacher called out, looking at her grading sheet. ‘Oh my god, please don’t see my name. Please tell me I don’t exist. Let me just disappear. I can’t do this’. “Oh! (Y/n) still hasn’t presented, come on over and I’ll pull up your project”, your teacher chirped.

Your heart pounded painfully hard in your chest, slowly standing up on jelly legs, keeping your gaze down as you walked to the whiteboard. You couldn’t possibly do this. You were going to die. Every mission you’d ever gone on seemed so miniscule in this moment, as you looked out to your peers. It was too dark to see most of their faces, which only made your situation worse. Your teacher pulled up the project on the projector, gesturing to you to start presenting, as she clicked her pen, ready to write down every mistake you made.

Letting out a jittery breath, you clasped your sweaty hands together and began talking. You were shaking so badly, it was like an earthquake had erupted inside of your body. You could feel the tears threatening to spill past your eyes, leaving a hard pain in your throat. Your chest hurt, and your breathing was becoming more erratic. But you had to finish, you had to get this over with. Just as you were on one of the last slides, a voice called from somewhere in the class, “Hey, pipsqueak! Speak up, would ya? We can’t hear you back here!”. The comment elicited a few snickers, which your teacher hushed quietly, but the damage was already done. The room was suddenly shrinking around you, as your chest tightened even further. You bit your lip, trying your best to compose yourself, attempting to push down your anxiety, but it only pushed back up more violently. “(Y/n)? You still have a few slides left”, your teacher said, but you didn’t hear her. Instead, your fight or flight instincts took over, and you raced out of the classroom, tears now breaking free, streaming down your face. You headed to the nearest bathroom, locking yourself in a stall, your whole world crumbling beneath you.

Leaning against the door, you slid down, breath caught in your throat, fighting to get out, but to no avail. Instinctively, you brought your knees up to your chest, clutching at the seams of your pants, letting out choked sobs and broken coughs. There was only one thing you could think of that might help you, and that was your teammates. You pulled your phone out of your pocket, continuing to shake violently, as you clicked the emergency contacts, thumb pressed to the first person, which just so happened to be Bucky. You lifted the phone to your ear, barely hearing the ring, despite your call volume being all the way up.

Bucky saw your name pop up on his phone, panic surging through him. You never called, it made you too anxious. He answered instantly, “(Y/n)? (Y/n), sweetheart, are you okay?”. His sudden panic mixed with your name caused both Steve and Sam to stand by him, all of them mentally preparing for an emergency. You wanted to reply, but all that came out was a squeak, as your fist collided with the tiled floor, your oxygen levels becoming more scarce by the second. Bucky put his phone on speaker, letting all three of them talk to you. “(Y/n), doll, you gotta breathe okay? Through your nose, count on your fingers”, Bucky stated, trying to keep his voice steady for you. “Yep, deep breaths (Y/n), you’ve got this. You’re gonna be okay”, Steve reassured you. After about 10 minutes of the three of them gently coaxing you out of your panic attack, you calmed slightly, leaving you crying quietly.

“We’re almost back at the compound, we’ll come and pick you up in about 20 minutes, okay?”, Steve said, giving no room for protests, although at this point you weren’t going to object. You wanted to go home. “Okay, I guess I should get back to class then”, you murmured, realizing that you’d probably been gone for over 15 minutes now. It was weird no one came to look for you, but you weren’t complaining. “If you aren’t ready to go back kid, that’s fine. We can stay on the call as long as you need”, Sam mentioned, his voice sounded beyond concerned. You had a bad habit of not taking care of yourself, especially in times of crisis. “No, I’ll be fine, gotta go back to get my stuff anyways”, you were dreading going back. The whole class would be focused on you for sure, not to mention the faux sympathy from your teacher, something that would surely cause another flood of tears. You just wanted to go unnoticed, for everyone to ignore your presence. “Alright, if you’re sure”. “I’m sure, I’ll see you guys soon”, you weren’t sure, but you had to convince them, you knew too well that they’d cause a scene at the school if things got worse. “Okay, stay safe sweetheart, we’ll be there as soon as possible”, Steve stated, before Bucky reluctantly hung up the phone.

Letting out a deep sigh, you pushed yourself up, groaning slightly as you forced your stiff body to move. You stepped out of the stall, silently thanking the universe for not letting anyone walk in during your breakdown. You looked to one of the mirrors, finding a disheveled figure staring back at you. You grabbed a paper towel, dampening it in the sink, and gently washing the dried tears off your face. You fixed your clothing and washed your hands, before making the godawful trip back to class. There was only 5 minutes left for the class, but that was more than enough time for shit to go wrong. You stood outside the door for a minute, taking a moment to compose yourself.

Turning the handle slowly, you eased your way past the door, the lights now on. Just as you expected, all eyes turned on you, but most turned away quickly, looking back to their friend or their phone. That lifted your nervousness a bit, as you started to head back to your desk, but your teacher had other plans, as she cleared her throat, motioning for you to go and talk to her. You cussed quietly to yourself, could this day get any worse? You dragged your feet over to her desk, biting your now scabbed lip. “So, your project was very good, therefore, I’m going to give you a 90, but I have to dock 10 points for your presentation”, she spoke quietly and sternly. Your face grew hot with her words, tears swelling in your eyes again. She was taking points off for something that you couldn’t control? It pissed you off to say the least. You only looked away from her desk, nodding slightly, knowing better than to open your mouth. “Alright then, you can go and pack up your things”. You walked quickly back to your desk, putting the few things you had taken out back into your backpack, before the bell rang for lunch. Dashing out of the class, you headed straight for the front of the school, more than ready for the day to be over. You’d email your 4th period teacher later on what work you missed out on. On your way, you made sure to text Peter, letting him know everything that happened, and that you wouldn’t be there for lunch.

You only had to wait for a few minutes, as Sam walked through the doors, spotting you quickly and walking over to you. “You alright kid?”. “Yeah, I’ll be fine, jus’ want this day to be done already”. He nodded, following you to the front office, signing everything to excuse you for the day. He kept a close eye on you the whole time, a protective hand placed on your shoulder. Stepping out of the building, he led you to the car where Bucky and Steve awaited. You got into the back seat, Sam sitting in the seat next to you.

“Hey doll, you feeling alright?”, Bucky quizzed, angling his body to look at you. “Yeah, ‘m glad you guys offered to pick me up though. Don’t really think I could’ve lasted another class”, you fidgeted with your hands, you knew your nerves wouldn’t calm for a while, but at least it was manageable now. “We’re always here for you, kid, no matter what”, Sam assured you, patting your shoulder softly. “Mhm, you can always come to us, even if we’re on a mission. Our job can always wait, your well being is more important than anything”, Steve added, looking briefly to you in the rearview mirror. “Thank you for that, you guys are the best”, you smiled bashfully. “No need to thank us, jus’ doing what’s right”, Bucky stated. “So, whatcha feel like doing when we get back?”, Sam asked. You thought for a moment, doing anything social sounded horrible at the moment, and the weighted blanket in your room was calling your name. “How ‘bout a pizza and movie night?”, you inquired, knowing they’d all like the idea, hell the whole team would probably join in. “Sounds good to me”, Steve mused, he always liked time for the team to bond. “Me too”. “Me as well, I’m starving dude”, Sam quipped, causing all of you to chuckle.

It didn’t take long to get back to the tower, all of you heading inside, you going to your room to set your stuff down and to change into something more comfy. After changing, you grabbed your weighted blanket, wrapping it around you, heading back down to the common room. Word must’ve spread fast, cause the whole team was gathered there, everyone sitting in a designated spot, except for Tony, who was currently ordering pizza over the phone. “Hey, there they are, rough day at school?”, Natasha asked, giving you a warm smile. “Yeah, not the greatest”, you huffed out a small laugh. “Well, in that case, you get to choose the first movie draga”, Pietro looked up at you from his spot on the floor. You hummed in response, before placing your decision on one of your favorite comfort movies. Clint started to look it up on the various streaming services, finding it almost instantly. “This one, right?”. You nodded happily, making your way over to sit between Steve and Wanda. “Hey, kiddo, you want a drink? And I’m guessing you want some extra garlic breadsticks too, right?”, Tony asked, holding his phone away from his mouth slightly. “Uhh, I’ll have a (f/d), and duh, of course I want garlic breadsticks”. “Yeah, what type of question is that?”, Pietro chimed in. Tony scoffed at him, rolling his eyes, but continued placing the order.

Wanda opened her arms next to you, allowing you to curl into her side as her arms wrapped softly around you. You stretched your legs out, Steve placed them on his lap, gently rubbing his thumb over your calf. Your nerves were finally winding down, as Clint pressed play on the movie. Wanda kept an arm wrapped around your back, her other hand resting gently on the side of your head, making sure to keep you close. The pizza arrived shortly after the movie had started, and you grabbed as much food as you wanted. You deserved it after the day you had. After the first movie finished, and the team voted on a new movie to watch, you felt yourself begin to drift off. You couldn’t have imagined a more perfect setting, comfort and warmth surrounding you. You didn’t make it far into the second movie before you fell asleep, listening to the sound of Wanda’s heart beating, the events from earlier that day flooding away, leaving you to sleep peacefully, knowing that you were safe and sound.

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