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talesof-old · 2 days

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poly!jily celebrating with you. maybe over you getting into your dream college/job. they would be the most supportive partners ever and spoil you rotten for your achievement i just know it

- 🦌

sorry this took me a minute, my new work schedule has me all kinds of fucked up - i wrote more of a finding out you got your dream job but i might also write a graduation celebration as well

celebration | l.e. & j.p.

pairing(s): poly!jily x reader

warning(s): alcohol consumption, mentions of anxiety bc of job interviews

word count: 658

masterlist

a/n: jily would totally spoil the fuck outta their partner, they’d be so obnoxious about it

“Oh?”

It was Lily’s voice that you heard in the other room. She’d answered the phone before you could even put your book down, so you’d decided to stay sitting.

“Hold on.”

Lily’s head poked around the corner. Her long copper hair fell over her shoulder, a curtain of red as she grinned. “They’re asking for you.”

You frowned, brushing off James’ inquisitive stare and setting your things aside. You crossed the room in no time, taking the phone from her to answer it.

“Hello,” you were quick to assure the person on the other line that it was in fact you. Lily and James stared with rapt attention, eyes wide. You’d been anticipating a call about a job for days now, frazzled and frustrated after three rounds of interviews. Surely, you’d said to James, if they were going to hire me they’d have done it by now.

James drew in a sharp breath as you smiled. The light in your eyes that he loved so dearly had returned. Excitement rattled his chest. “Of course. I’ll be there.”

Your face twisted into an expression of pure relief as you turned and nearly squealed. Lily was already beaming back at you. “I got it!”

Lily cheered, opening her arms and squeezing you tight when you fell into her embrace. You could practically feel the stress melting away as you rested your head on her shoulder. James wrapped his arms around the two of you, smothering you with kisses to your head. “I’m so proud of you, sweets.”

Your face heated and you turned to look at him. He pressed a wet kiss to your cheek, the loud ‘smack’ seeming to echo through your head. Lily giggled at your flustered expression.

“It seems we need to celebrate. James, get the wine. We’ll go to dinner tonight, year? That Italian place you like?”

James waltzed away from the two of you, ready to pour three glasses as Lily pulled herself from your arms. “I knew you’d get it.” A wave of emotion rushed through you. To have the support of the most brilliant people in the world, your people, was truly a blessing you’d never take for granted. Tears turned your eyes glassy, though you were quick to blink them away. “I’m so glad the interviews are over.”

Lily laughed and laced your fingers together, pulling you into the kitchen where James stood filling three glasses. “To you, sweets. You never fail to impress us.” Lily kissed your cheek and took the glass of moscato from your boyfriend.

“My clever darling.”

You buried your face in your hands as James cooed at you. They were insufferable like this, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“You alright, sweets? Surely handling a little praise is child’s play to you, hm? Would hate to have you hiding your face from me.” You reached out and gently shoved him, pretending to cringe away when he went to grab you. He gasped in mock offense. Lily hummed behind you, leaning against the counter while James all but chased after you.

“I can’t believe you’d push me away.” You removed your hands from your face to look at him. His lip was jutted out in a mock pout, but humor lined the planes of his face. You sighed, stepping into his outstretched arms, careful of the glass still in his hand.

He wrapped his arms tight around you, kissing your temple. “You’re lucky we love you.” The teasing lilt in his voice was enough to have you poking him hard in the stomach. He chuckled as you rested your cheek on his chest and grinned. How lucky you were, indeed.

+++

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jareaul0ver · 6 hours

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can you write a fic where nika and reader have been doing long distance for a while and reader surprises her at a game or something. i need more nika fluff in my life

wc: 826 warnings: none, just fluffy pairings: mika muhl x fem!reader

“Don’t you have to get ready for your game soon?” Your voice echoed out of the speaker of Nika’s phone.

She sighed. “Yeah, but I wanna talk to you more. I wish I could see you, why didn’t you FaceTime me?” You smiled, hearing the pout in her voice.

“My FaceTime isn’t working, I told you. I tried to call my mom and it wouldn’t go through.” You lied straight through your teeth. Nika didn’t know that though, she always believed what you had to say, for better or for worse.

“Now go get ready for your game, it’s uh.. almost 4:30 in Seattle right?”

You heard a rustling coming from your phone and you assumed that Nika was getting out of bed. “Mhm, fine, whatever you say.” You giggled and you heard a small laugh come from her. “I love you, babe.”

“I love you too, go crush it out there.” You two said your goodbyes and once you hung up, you felt a smack on your arm. “Hit me again, I swear to God, Paige.” You glared at the blonde standing next to you.

“Sorry, can’t help it. Our plan is working!” She grinned.

You rolled your eyes and pushed her by her shoulder. “Our plan. You're only here because I invited you."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Now, lets kill some time and go get your girl some flowers."

Although you wanted to be up close to see Nika's game, you had to sit further back to stay hidden. You wanted this to fully be a surprise that you were here, you didn't go through all the little white lies for nothing.

The game was nearing the end and Seattle was down by a few points. You bit your nails anxiously, scared that the outcome of the game would ruin the surprise.

Seattle's coach called a time out and you watched Nika with keen eyes. You'd always admired her passion for the game, but you'd only ever seen her play when she knew you were going to be there.

Seeing her playing this good, for a professional team, when she didn't even knew you were there? It made your heart swell. Whether she would admit it or not, she would do everything to impress you on the court.

But with her not knowing you were there, she played for herself and her team, and it was a whole other side of her playing that you hadn't seen in a while. You were incredibly proud of her and how far she's gotten.

The game resumed and stakes were high. Seattle had managed to catch up, but a last second buzzer beater from the opposing team had dimmed their hope in winning.

Nika's shoulders immediately slumped and you found yourself frowning. Paige put a hand on your shoulder. "C'mon, let's go down and cheer her up."

You agreed and walked down to the staircase that led to the courtside seats. You hid yourself from Nika's gaze and let Paige approach her first.

The second Nika saw the blonde she smiled. She rushed over to her and hugged her. "The hell are you doing here?"

Paige hugged her back and laughed. "Wanted to surprise you." You smiled at the look on Nika's face. "I've got another surprise for ya."

Nika looked at her confused for a second before she saw you emerging from behind her. She froze in place for a quick beat before running over to you and almost tackling you.

You squealed at the contact and wrapped your arms around her. The feeling of her breath hit your neck, and everything felt like how it did before she left. You missed moments like these, you craved them, and Nika did too.

She pulled back and held your face in her hands. "You're here?! You're here!" She kissed you briefly before pulling you back into a hug.

You giggled and let her soak in the moment with you. "I'm here." You mumbled into her ear. The feeling of her lips pressing small kisses on your neck made your knees weak. "Baby, stop." You laughed out.

She pulled back and your eyes met her glossy ones. "I just.. I can't believe you're here. When did you?-"

"Me and Paige flew out this morning. That's why I was up so early and why I couldn't facetime." You held out the bouquet of flowers you had for her. "And these are for you."

She took them and wrapped her arm around your waist. She pulled you into her side and kissed your temple. "So you lied to me? Hm?" She teased playfully.

"Guess so, but it was worth it, wasn't it?" You leaned your head against her shoulder and angled it to look up at her.

She looked down at you with pure admiration. "It was, this makes up for the loss. I love you."

#nika muhl #lgbtq #nika muhl x reader #seattle storm #wlw #wnba #jareaul0ver🤍

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passionateseadruid · 2 days

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Snake King's bride 4

⚠️CONTENT WARING: THERE WILL BE SOME MENTIONS OF PERIODS THIS CHAPTER! IT'S NOT THE WHOLE CHAPTER I'LL MARK WERE IT IS SO IF ANYONE IS UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT YOU CAN JUST SKIP. IT'S NOTHING GRAFFIC BUT I UNDERSTAND IF IT MIGHT MAKE SOME OF YOU UNCOMFORTABLE! ALSO FORCED KISSING FROM HERE ON OUT!⚠️ Sometimes I need to write shit for myself okay!

Two weeks had past since you'd met Charlie and Renesmee and her wife (Nina) had started to work for you. Renesmee had become a maid to you. Waking you up, helping you pick out your outfit, and she and Nina would have breakfast with you the days Lucifer didn't make you breakfast.

Nina was a tall succubus. She had cotton candy pink skin and hot pink hair, and her horns resembled a heart but they pointed outward. Nina wore a slick leather outfit with a bulletproof vest and forearm and shin pads. For a succubus Nina wasn't particularly curvy but she was very tall, 7 feet tall in fact. You didn't exactly make the best first impression with her because the first thing you said was "Dang where did the WNBA hide you?"

Other than the scowl she had on her face she was always cordial at breakfast. And she seemed to get along well enough with Pluto the head of Lucifer's security.

////////////////////////////////////////

WARNING PERIOD CONTENT AHEAD!

One morning you awoke in a pool of your own blood with a splitting pain in your abdomen.

"I'm dying." You mumbled.

"DARLING WHAT'S WRONG?" Lucifer bursts in with a puff of red smoke. He sees you on the bed dark red, almost black, on the sheets. He was in his normal outfit, minus the hat, jacket and cane.

"I'm so glad I used your old shirt as my pajama's last night." You mumbled and got up. "Did- Charlie is half angel."

"Yes?"

"But then again Lilith was human wasn't she? Well you do know what a period is. Do you have anything to deal with this?"

"Oh your uh- I'll have someone clean up the sheets and blankets. How about I run a bath for you and make you some food?"

"I'll go run a bath and if you decide to make me food you can have Renesmee or Styx deliver it."

"Nonsense! And let them see your body, especially before I get to? Unthinkable. Why are you so mean to me?"

"You're the one who caused this asshole.

"Well now we know when you're ovulating, next month I can take care of this problem for you~" You rush to the bathroom and lock the door. "Think about it! For nine months you would get to eat whatever you wanted and you wouldn't have to deal with a period~"

"Please just get me some pain meds and pads!"

Before you appeared a light pink bottle and a glass. Outside the door you hear a big thud and when you crack the door you see packets of every type of hygiene product you might need. Tampons, pad with and without wings, thin and thick. You name it it was in there.

"At least he's not asking me what size pussy I wear." You rolled your eyes.

(A/n: That's so Adam core, I miss him so much. ;-;)

////////////////////////////////////////

OKAY IT'S OVER

You get out of the tub and wrap a towel around you and step into your room to change into some sweatpants and a zipper hoodie.

"You uh... you look comfy." You quickly turn around and see Lucifer standing in the doorway, pancakes in his hands. His cheeks were even more red then the clown circles he has.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"I-I didn't see anything! Really! You just look so comfy. I never got to see Lilith in anything that didn't show off her curves so seeing my bride to be in something that looks so soft is... different. A good different for sure! Can I... can I have a hug please? I just want to feel how soft it is."

"No."

He rolls his eyes. He walks over to a little mahogany table between the bed and the bathroom. Couches on either side. "You know, I don't get you. I've given you everything you could ask for and more. But you don't seem to care. You just sit around in the library or in your room all day. You're not trying to get to know me like you claim. And another thing, I know that you're not traditional. I may not know what your reason for telling these lies is but I know when you lie."

'That's right. One of his epithets is the father of lies.'

"Thank you for what you've done for me this morning. But I'd like to be left alone."

"As you wish darling." He takes his leave.

Nina and Renesmee walked in and you sat on one of the couches to eat the pancakes that Lucifer made for you. Renesmee cleaned up the room and you looked at her. "Hey do you need any help?"

"Miss please we go through this every day. I'm your maid, and I'm sure the king would prefer if you didn't lift a finger."

"I don't care what the king says. I don't want you to overwork yourself."

"I'm fine miss. I'm much more equipped to be a maid than my position in my old job. I'm quick and I like rolling around on the janitor cart."

"I still feel bad. I've never had a maid in my life. On top of that the king is okay with this unfair social system where Imps are looked down upon simply because of how they were born. I'm not going to participate in that just because it's how the way things are."

"Ahem!" Styx Calls from the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt but the king has sent some files over regarding the Halloween ball that will be held at the end of the month. He also sent a note. 'Sorry to drop this on you doll but Lilith was usually the one to handle planning the events we hosted. I've sent over everything we have regarding past years, please see to it by the end of the day and if you could select one of the couples costumes I've chosen for us to wear.' "

You took the files from them and looked through them. "Thank you Styx... here this is the costume I want." You hand a photo to them and start looking through the other files. You spend the rest of the day getting it ready, with the help of Renesmee and Nina of course. Ordering decoration, hiring a caterer, hiring temporary staff to help attendants, renting furniture, booking a band, and making a guest list.

"Do you guys think they'll play monster mash?" You ask the women.

"I don't know what that is, miss." Renesmee shook her head.

"Human music my love." Nina said monotonously.

"What do you think you two will wear?"

"Oh! uh..." Renesmee looked away bashfully.

"We're not coming." Nina said in the same tone.

"What? Why?" You asked disappointed.

"We get one night off we're not spending it at work." Nina glared at you.

"Okay, you don't have to come. I just thought it would be fun to have you two there." You dropped the issue.

////////////////////////////////////////

At the end of the month you (unwillingly) got ready for the party. You put on a short red dress with a sweetheart neckline and an under bust corset, along with a small white waist apron. Several stylists crowd around you. Lucifer had cast an illusion on you earlier that day to transform you identically to how you looked the day you went to the mall with him. One of the stylists curled your hair, one worked on your nails, one worked on your make-up (applying bright red lipstick and such) and the last was supervising and communicating with Lucifer's stylists.

"No Sharron! I told you we cannot compromise on the ears. Madam Rouge personally made these designs, she's going to be there tonight, and if everything is not to her liking she is going to have a fit.

...

Well the king should have thought about that before he ordered it.

...

If he thinks it embarrassing maybe HE should have picked out the costume.

...

That's not my problem, Sharron. Madam Rogue isn't going to accept excuses, especially not "He was trying to make her more comfortable".

...

Like I JUST SAID Sharron. If the king thinks the faux fur ears are itchy he has to deal with it.

...

I don't care if he's the king Sharron! Fine if you're being a pussy I'll deal with it. Put him on the phone."

"I can deal with it ma'am."

"Would you? Thank you sweetheart, you're such a gem." She mutes the phone for a second. "Keep this between you and me, I prefer you over Lilith. That lazy bitch would NEVER have dealt with His Majesty when he's having one of his temper tantrums." You take the phone and un mute him as she keeps rambling. "He's worse than Vox and Val I swear. I don't care what Velvette says, that bitch is a liar, or she gives herself too much credit."

(A/n: Velvette and Vox! My BBGs❤️ Fuck Valentino! he's a piece of💩)

"Hi." You say into the unmuted receiver. "How are you?"

"Hi Darling! Everything is fine but the ears and gloves are kind of itchy. I'm glad that Rogue didn't insist on something weird for the tail like a-"

"Okay! Okay! That's enough. Look I know it might be uncomfortable but it's just for one night."

"I want a kiss for being good then."

"Fine. I'll see you in five'"

"Bye Darling~"

About an hour into the night you left Lucifer talking to some of his friends to go find some food. He wore all gray with wolf ears, claws, and a tail (attached to a belt; a tight leather one-piece with a faux fur collar; and some boots. You brought your red hood over your face to try to ward of lingering eyes trying to catch a peak at Lucifer's new bitch.

You looked back to the couple that he was talking to. An Imp almost his height with a green jester cap and a black and white stripped suit; paired with a tall demon with three faces dressed in a big ruffled red dress that had an open shirt in the front with pants.

You wandered around, looking at other people's costumes and trying to find the snack bar. That Madam Rouge lady had dressed up as Glenda from the wizard of Oz. There was a guy with a TV head who was dressed up like batman in the corner making out with a tall guy dressed up as the Joker. With a girl dressed up as Harley Quinn filming the whole thing.

You looked away and saw Charlie in a Green shirt with a big M on it and a matching tutu and bow and a girl next to her with gray skin and white hair dressed identically but in brown.

You wanted to make your way over to them but as soon as Charlie saw you she ran. You followed her to try and explain yourself. To try and see if she could get you out of Hell.

"That's her Vaggie!"

"Hun calm down."

"Dad's breaking all the rules for a woman he just met!"

"We don't know that."

"Vaggie! She's human! Living human souls aren't allowed in either of the afterlife's. My mom had to be turned into the first Succubus to even survive in Hell. This is breaking so many conventions. If he makes a deal for a soul he has to devour the person's soul or kill them and drag them to hell. He has a living human with him!"

'He certainly wants to devour me but not in the way you think Charlie.' you think.

"Maybe it's a misunderstanding. You could ask him."

"How can I ask him about her after I blew up at him!? How could he take a girl so young to be his wife? Vaggie she's so young she could be my grand kid!"

"Yeah but you've been alive for thousands of years Charlie. I don't think normal rules apply here."

"I just... wish that she had more time to experience independence before being thrust into this."

"He seems happy." This Vaggie girl said.

"I suppose. And I want him to be happy. He deserves to be happy. And she did invite us. Maybe she wants this. Okay. I'll go apologize to dad and tell him he has my blessing.

'Abort mission! Abort Mission!' You turn and run. You run so far away from the ball room you realize you've found yourself at the guest bathrooms.

"Wow! Hello cutie~" you turn around and see a man dressed as a vampire. "May I just say I love the costume! You're Luci's girl huh? What made you two want to be little red ridding hood and the big bad wolf."

"I felt it fitting. Him being a predator and me being his victim."

"Okay that turned dark real quick. Sold your soul to him huh?"

"No. I was sacrificed, by someone I thought was my friend."

"Oof. That's tough."

"I want to get away from him so badly." You confess. "I'm tired of him love bombing me steady."

"Maybe I can help. The names Agamemnon! I'm an up and coming overlord of Hell You sell your soul to me and I'll make sure you never have to talk to him again." He holds out his hand.

"Deal." You take his hand without thinking about it for even a second.

He takes off your cape, draping it over his arm and wraps his coat around you.

He led you through the ballroom toward the exit, and just when you are at the desolate foyer you two are blinded by a bright flash and when the light fades you look to Agamemnon and see that he is no longer standing nest to you, a pile of dust in his place, covering your red cape. You look back and see a seething Lucifer. His horns popped out, a small flame burning in between them, a halo surrounding his horns. His eyes were red, and he has puffing out smoke from his huffs.

He walked up to you and ripped off the coat burning it to ashes in an instant. He pulled the red cape back on you and grabbed on your wrist. "How DARE you! You sold your soul to a filthy SINNER? I've tried to be good. I've tried to seduce you. I've let you have your space. I've spoiled you. I was willing to give you time to fall in love with me. And yet apparently it hasn't been good enough for you. You know what? No more! You will be my wife, you will have my children, and you will LOVE ME!!" He pulled you back to the ball room. "If you say anything in there to ANYONE I'll kill your entire fucking family." He burst in and pulled you up on stage with him. "Attention everyone!" He smiled and continued. "We have an exciting announcement for you all! My beautiful bride and I are getting married in six months!" Your blood ran cold. For trying to run away he cut your time to escape in half. He knows what you're trying to do, but he needs time to prepare a wedding. He just got back into Charlie's good graces so he can't rush a wedding and mess things up.

For the rest of the night You stood next to him, his arm gripping your waist in a death grip, getting congrats and passive aggressively asking for an invitation.

"Hi..." Charlie came up to you and her dad. "I know that we didn't start off on the wrong foot, I've apologized to dad but I'd like to apologize to you as well."

"No that's okay. I grew up on the evil stepmom trope. I wouldn't blame you if you tried to shoot me with a shotgun but accidentally shot your dad and tried to frame me. I get it."

"Okay?"

"Have you never seen legally blonde?"

"No?"

"Oh, sorry to spoil the ending then."

"Anyway, I'm happy to have you join the family." She pulled you in for a hug. You hugged back as to not piss off Lucifer any more than you already had.

After the party Lucifer carried you to his room. you protested profusely and he threw you onto the bed. He held you down and snapped his fingers as your costume swapped into that of one of your night gowns. Your costume laid forgotten on his bed floor. He threw off his clothes and stayed in his boxers. "Don't get this twisted. This is not fun sexy times. I'm boing to hold you here tonight to make sure you understand that YOU. ARE. MINE."

"okay..." You nodded obediently. He pulled the covers over you both and wrapped his arm around you. His chest to four back.

"Goodnight doll. I hope you have sweet dreams of me~"

You said nothing as you cried yourself to sleep.

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oatbugs · 12 days

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procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months #to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them #in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought #i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are #and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it #its worth missing i think #i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over #(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think #i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat #they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand #how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much #i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around #something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode #arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully #last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing #and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets #and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably #have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused #blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like #i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much #my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to #music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads #i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says #what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.

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wonder-worker · 1 month

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"The feast of the Nativity of Saint John the Baptist being appointed as the day upon which the coronation of the king [Edward V] would take place without fail, all both hoped for and expected a season of prosperity for the kingdom."

-Excerpt from the Croyland Continuator / David Horspool, "Richard III: A Ruler and Reputation"

Even though Edward IV’s death was unexpected, after twelve years of peace there need not have been too much of a sense of foreboding about the succession. The great dynastic wound from which the Wars of the Roses had grown had not so much been healed as cauterized by the extinction of the House of Lancaster. There was no rush for London, as had happened in earlier, disputed successions. The royal party didn’t set out from Ludlow for ten days after hearing the news of Edward IV’s death, while Richard took his time, too. And the new king had [his mother the dowager queen and] two uncles to support him: his mother’s brother, the sophisticated, cultured, highly experienced Earl Rivers; and his father’s, the loyal and reliable Duke of Gloucester, to whom Edward IV had entrusted unprecedented power and vital military command.

... [Richard of Gloucester] had achieved his goal by a mixture of luck and ruthlessness, and if he made it appear, or even believed himself, that destiny played a part, this only made him a man in step with his times. Modern historians have no time for destiny, but sometimes the more ‘structuralist’ interpretations of the events surrounding the usurpation can come close to it. When we read that ‘the chances of preserving an unchallenged succession were . . . weakened by the estrangement of many of the rank-and-file nobility from . . . high politics, which was partly a consequence of the Wars of the Roses and partly of Edward IV’s own policies’, it is hard not to conclude that an unforeseeable turn of events is being recast as a predictable one. But without one overriding factor – the actions of Richard, Duke of Gloucester after he took the decision to make himself King Richard III – none of this could have happened. That is, when the same author concedes ‘Nor can we discount Richard’s own forceful character’, he is pitching it rather low*.

Edward IV had not left behind a factional fault line waiting to be shaken apart. Richard of Gloucester’s decision to usurp was a political earthquake that could not have been forecast on 9 April, when Edward died. After all, Simon Stallworth did not even anticipate it on 21 June, the day before Richard went public. We should be wary of allowing hindsight to give us more clairvoyance than the well-informed contemporary who had no idea ‘what schall happyne’. This is not to argue that Richard’s will alone allowed him to take the Crown. Clearly, the circumstances of a minority, the existence of powerful magnates with access to private forces, and the reasonably recent examples of resorts to violence and deposition of kings, made Richard’s path a more conceivable one. But Richard’s own tactics, his arrest of Rivers, Vaughan and Grey, the rounding up of Hastings and the bishops, relied on surprise. If men as close as these to the workings of high politics at a delicate juncture had no inkling of what might happen, the least historians can do is to reflect that uncertainty [...].

(*The author who Horspool is referencing and disagreeing with is Charles Ross)

#wars of the roses #edward v #richard iii #edward iv #my post #I'm writing a post on this topic but I have no idea when I'll finish it so I figured I should post Horspool's epic analysis #or should I say epic takedown? <3 #friendly reminder that Richard's usurpation happened primarily and decidedly because of Richard's own decisions and actions #we need to stop downplaying his singular agency and accountability by casting the blame on others #most of all Elizabeth Woodville and her family but also the bizarre interpretation of historians like Ross and Pollard (et al)#who somehow hold Edward more responsible (through a 'structuralist' view as Horspool says) even though that literally makes no sense #also friendly reminder that actual contemporaries did not view Edward V's minority as a sign of worry and potential discontent #quite the opposite - they expected him to have a prosperous reign. which made sense since Edward IV left his son a far more stable #country than any former minor king (and most other adult kings tbh). The irony is that it was his son's usurper who benefitted from it.#also I added Elizabeth Woodville to the list because Edward V himself specifically said that he trusted the governance of the country #'to the peers of the realm and the queen' as quoted by Mancini (likely relayed to him by John Argentine)#and this is supported by evidence. After Edward's death the Croyland Continuator substitutes Elizabeth's role in the council #for that of the King: 'the counsellors of the king now deceased were present with the queen'#we know Elizabeth presided over all the council's decisions and initiated proposals (the size of her son's military escort) on her own #She was clearly the one with the most authority in the council (who were described as being present with *her* not anyone else)#Hastings made demands but he couldn't enforce them at all (and was in fact worried). It was clearly Elizabeth who had that power.#She was likely going to play a very prominent role during her son's minority and imo it's problematic to assume otherwise #(Lynda Pidgeon assumes otherwise but she's based her assumption on objectively false information so I don't think we should take her #seriously)(see: she claims that EW lacked influence compared to her male relatives in royal councils when EW HERSELF WAS IN ROYAL COUNCILS)#That's not to go too far the other direction and claim EW tried to dominate and tactlessly exclude others - we know she didn't #The impression we get by this first council and by Richard's own actions indicates that she Richard and Anthony would likely #work *together* when it came to governing the realm #I do find it frustrating when people disregard the fact that based on the impression we have she would've had a very visible #and powerful role

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rosicheeks · 2 months

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i do not know if i ever sent this to you. i have posted it. i hope you like it Princess.

#uhhhhhm no you HAVE NOT SENT THIS TO ME BEFORE?!?!#I literally am speechless #I’m not super talky right now #but even if I was I feel like I’d still be fucking speechless #like I already said I love your writing 🩷#and it fucking BLOWS ME AWAY when people write about me or use me as an inspiration #like????????? what??????? me???????????!#I’m going to keep this close to my heart and look at it whenever I’m feeling down #I don’t remember if I said that already but it’s true #I need to get a journal or a cute box to put things like this in so I can just grab it and look through them when I’m feeling shitty #one thing I needed to say is the fact that you shared this with me now of all times??? is kinda crazy to me #idk if it’s a coincidence or if the universe/God/whoever/whatever is trying to tell me to go back into music and singing #not going to go into it too much but I’ve been looking at my life a lot lately #and I’m realizing I’m not getting any younger…. I know I’m still young but if I don’t do something soon -#my life is going to completely pass before my eyes and I really really don’t want that #I’m *finally* going to get mental help soon (long story but I have to wait a few weeks)#and once I’m actually mentally stable I can focus on what I want to do with my life #so I’ve been thinking a lot about my performing arts background and then randomly a get an email from a choir director I know #asking if I could please join the choir for their Easter performance cause they could really use my high notes #and she just kept complimenting me and it felt really nice ☺️#then when I went to the first rehearsal I sat next to this girl and we were singing a part and the first sopranos go up to a high A #and I can hit it easily but most of them couldn’t so it felt like I was going this mini solo lol #but she asks me what my range is and I told her that back when I trained I could sing queen of the night which I think goes up to an F6 #and she was talking about how impressive that is #and it made me think about if I actually trained and got back into it how good I actually could get #I don’t mean this to be like ‘look at me look at me I’m so good’#it just feels nice to have a little bit of a direction again #who knows if I’ll actually go down the music path again but it does sound damn exciting #I miss it with all my heart - I miss singing and performing and acting… I even miss music theory #anyway rant over and i ran out of space but thank you so much I seriously can’t thank you enough 😭🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

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softquietsteadylove · 1 year

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can you write some Thenamesh fluff? like, the two of them sleeping in front of a fireplace, snuggled up

Gilgamesh tossed another log into the fire as the door opened and shut, the air from it flickering the flames into a little dance. He leaned back on his elbows. "Hey."

"Hey," Thena smiled as she walked over to him, dropping the cloak and heavy robe behind her as she did. She shuddered once rid of the fine dressings of a royal war advisor, but that allowed her to hurriedly burrow under the blankets Gil had spread out for them.

"How's she doing?" Gil asked as Thena settled herself into his side. He asked it casually, the way he would ask about Sprite or Makkari or Sersi.

But they were referring to Olga, the current queen regent of Kievan-Rus, and freshly widowed due to Drevlian attack. The regent took the killing of her husband - cruel and undeniably torturous - personally.

She had asked her revered and unearthly war advisor how she should proceed. Ajak and Sersi had both moved to set the slander aside--for peace. And while being an advisor didn't mean Thena could incite grand wars between humans, she had answered honestly.

"What would you do?" Olga had looked up at Thena from her throne. "If it was your husband?"

Thena had thought about Gilgamesh in an instant, imagining his smiles, his hands holding hers, the warmth of him as he banished the unrelenting cold from bothering her.

"I would burn the world to the ground and then reshape the ashes in their likeness so they could beg my forgiveness from beyond the grave."

"Thena," Gil raised his brows, although for whatever he was feeling about the declaration, he did not look surprised about it.

"She may do with that advice what she desires," Thena mumbled, the warmth of Gilgamesh already soothing her like a cat in a sunbeam.

"Ajak is gonna be mad," Gil teased quietly as he leaned forward and reached into the fire with his bare hand to adjust the position of a log. He wiped the ashes off on the rug before pulling Thena into his lap.

"She already is," Thena sighed, although she did not care if their Prime thought she was being too violent in her suggestions. Olga had asked her - human woman to Warrior Eternal - and Thena had given her honest answer. She tightened her arms around Gil's neck.

He rubbed her back. She wasn't saying as much, but the thought of what she would have to do without him always tended to shake her. They were Eternals--it wasn't something they had to consider often. But they were also Fighters, and it was technically possible for them to perish. And that never seemed to bother the Warrior Eternal until they were on the subject of him.

"I can't imagine what she's feeling," Thena finally confessed in a whisper, the crackling of the fire underscoring her words. "If I had to worry about you dying from an attack by a handful of humans-"

Gil let her burrow into him deeper, her face pressed to his neck, her hands clinging to him. He was happy to let her, bending one of his legs and letting it cushion the curve of her back. He tucked the blanket over his shoulders more around her, even at the cost of having his other arm exposed to the open air. "So, we're going to war, huh?"

"I doubt they'll need us," Thena sighed, unwinding slowly. She pressed a hand to his chest. "Olga has...other methods in mind."

"I don't wanna know," Gil snorted as he adjusted them again. He laid himself lengthwise, parallel to the fire. He rested on his back with Thena stretched out on top of him. His hand raised to push her hair behind her ear. "I'm sure I'll be horrified at what she's about to do."

Thena pursed her lips, "I think they'll be somewhat deserving of whatever she is about to enact."

Gilgamesh chuckled, raising his head just to touch the tip of his nose to hers. "You menace."

Thena purred as she melted into him, under the blankets, close to the fire, listening to the beat of his heart and the rise of his lungs under her. "Olga was rather creative with her plan, actually. She needs no assistance from me."

"That's a little scary," Gil snorted. He gave her waist a squeeze. "You're beautiful when you're violent."

Thena laughed, all of her teeth showing.

Gil rolled them to the side, letting Thena's back be closest to the fire. He didn't need the extra warmth; he pulled her closer to him, burying his nose in her hair. "My Solnyshkuh has started another war, hm?"

Thena inhaled against his chest, running her hand up his flank and over his pectoral. "I do not start wars, I finish them."

"Well," Gil let out a loud sigh, the comfort of their position also lulling him into rest. "Whatever you ladies have planned, you know I'm around if you need me."

"Hm," Thena pressed her smile into his shirt, "yes, my ever helpful husband."

It wasn't the first time they had been taken for a married pair, and it would be far from the last. It wasn't as if it was out of the question for them.

Gil twirled a lock of her hair around his finger. "We should really get around to that."

"I suppose so."

"Olga could marry us."

"She's busy, Gil."

"After, I mean."

#Thenamesh Rus AU #I have been wanting to write this #for so long #Olga said gaslight gatekeep girlboss let's go to war #and Thena is like I didn't tell her directly to do this it isn't my fault #Ajak is trying to convince her otherwise but Olga already knows what she wants to do #for her husband's revenge #and Thena is rather impressed with the human woman's ideas #Thena checks in on young Olga and sees how she's doing #she and Gil both give the regent some space #she had often commented on how idyllic their marriage seemed #even while her own husband was alive #Gil is very considerate about that #seriously look up St. Olga of Kiev and just...take in everything this lady did #it's very Thena of her

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2truehearts · 11 months

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just had my mom read a zhongli piece and she liked it,,,,,, past me would be flying through the ROOF RN IF THEY WERE HERE DLSKSNKSJDJD

#— nonsense.#SHE SAID SHE WAS IMPRESSED AND LIKED MY WRITING ;;;;;;;#she knows how to reduce me to a sobbinf mess tf mom #the first time she laughed at me #the second time she just said meh #THEN TODAY AKA THE THIRD TIME SHE SMILED AND SAID IM GOOD AT THIS SHIT GOODBYE WORLD I HAVE DIED ACK—#fun fact zhongli was a character she liked so she added bonus points for “trying to woo her with favorites” KKAJSHKDKDHDHDHHSHDLSLAL #[] 🖇 .#[] 📂 .

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salsflore · 1 year

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ummmm

#oh mika there is beauty in life~ look at your future! everything will be worth it in the end~#my favorite image on this device btw ^#cw negative #cw vent #you know where this is going. apologies my mind is a mess and i really just need to get it out because i find its better than-#-writing a semi formal email to that One (1) emotional support organization and i’m afraid to make a call so #but i just genuinely believe things would be better off if i weren’t alive. a bit of a silly thing to jump to i know but #my tuition fees aren't cheap and i'm not even that great of a student or a daughter or a sister and i-#-have no talents or remarkable feats. i’m not impressive in any way. and i hate hearing shit about how ^_^ its okay! we all have something-#-special about ourselves! for example maybe you have really good hand writing and thats good enough ~ but that doesn't work for me because-#-i have nothing. my handwriting isn't good my singing isn't good i'm not artistically gifted i don't have some random affinity for puzzles-#-i'm not charming or somehow really good at calculation or super creative or a really comforting friend i really have nothing at all #i don’t want to die. i have no plans on doing that sort of thing anytime soon— don’t misunderstand me #i just wholeheartedly believe i don’t deserve to be here anymore not because i’m not loved. i just can’t stand myself and my teenage years-#-feel so long and i'm so fragile how much longer do i have to tolerate. i'm contributing nothing. why should my family have to feed and-#-clothe a burden like me who provides nothing. why should my friends care for someone like me. i’m not really that funny or sweet or great-#-with advice giving or pretty or helpful in any way. why is it that life is genuinely easier for others. what did i do? what can i do?#how much longer must i tolerate this? would you believe me if i said i really did try to change my mindset this time?#i have no one in real life to talk to. therapists are pricey and i don’t think mine was helping me in any way anyways. she was nice though #so every night i sleep hoping i wake up somewhere else. somewhere where i'm happier and i can live all my silly fantasies where i'm a fun-#-and lovely person who has everything she wants and nothing goes wrong ever!!#how much longer must i hang onto the little things. i’m in such an exruciating amount of pain that i want to kill myself without dying? lol #everyone repeats the same stuff. get bit #i can't rely on the joy of having coffee every morning or persevere for the sake of seeing cute cats on insta. nothing will ease the burden

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whyisthisfrenchguymasturbating · 8 months

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i NEED to stop listening to people on instagram hyping up books because what the fuck was that

#this is about lapvona #stop promising me body horror when what you mean is a disabled person exists. die forever #besides that the book was just not good in my humble opinion. saw a review that said it had nothing new or compelling to say about human #nature and i agree. if youre gonna write the 828494th book about ooaaiugah the nature of humanity is inherently violent #at least make it fucking entertaining #also wtf was up with all the adult breastfeeding? like why? not everything Has to have a reason ofc #but like i get the points the author is making with all the other shit irt capitalism and organized religion and misogyny and abuse and #structures of abuse #but why are so many grown men in this book sucking old lady tits. was it supposed to be disturbing?#idk the point of art is to make you feel something. right? this book failed. all it stirred in me is a weak #...meh?#the worst thing a book can be is boring. waste of my fuckin time. maybe the other stuff shes written will hit better for me but im not that #interested in reading them because i was so so so disappointed by this book. augh #its just such a nothingburger of a book. to me.#idk maybe im desensitized cause im a big ol yucky gorehound #but this book just held absolutely nothing for me. i keep hearing over and over how disturbing and gory it is #and in my estimation it really did not leave that impression.#not detective pikachu #richie reads

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the-everqueen · 1 year

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did the postdoc interview.

#paperstars 23 #idk how it went #pros:#i prepped my spiel about my research in advance #the person heading the interview mentioned multiple times that she wished we had more time to talk #and that she wanted to hear my ideas about various subjects #also another interviewer told me that if my writing sample was any indication then the diss must be stellar #i could sort of anticipate most of the q's and i kept bringing it back to what their institution would get out of this deal #cons:#one of the interviews was...so hard for me to read #i couldn't tell if he was bored or dissatisfied with my answers #and i felt like i did not impress him at all #a couple times my answers felt...really shallow?...as they were coming out of my mouth?#like ''oh wow is there no substance to what i'm saying; am i just really really stupid and delusional''?#i was SO sweaty when we finished #and i wanted to throw up both before and after #i hate that i'm getting my hopes up #and then suddenly i'll be like ''oh shit wait you answered that wrong you should have said THIS now you won't get it''#the hope and disappointment are this constantly undulating wave #like. on the one hand. this postdoc is LITERALLY WHAT I DO.#on the other hand. maybe it's literally what someone else who's smarter than me does.

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lovvelorrn · 1 year

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#started a new job yesterday and i’m pretty much doing like stuff that i did at my last job #(where they treated me so badly i wrote diary entries every time i had a meeting)#and so they asked me write an article as a copywriting test of sorts #(see if i get the tone. if i write it fast enough etc) and i spent the entirety of yesterday’s afternoon #researching and this entire morning writing and the boss just messaged me #and i was SO nervous to get feedback bc i’m soooo not over that other job’s traumatic experience #but then she said and i quote ‘we’re reading it now and it’s amazing!’ ‘it’s impressive for your first article with us’ ‘you got the tone #perfectly’ and now i’m almost crying lmao. so this is what a healthy environment is like huh??? WOW #the things we put up with etc etc #tbd

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sttoru · 1 month

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𝝑𝑒 SYNOPSIS. sukuna is shameless—not caring if anyone were to ever catch him righteously claiming ownership over his favorite concubine in the garden.

wc. 1.5k-ish

tags. true form!sukuna x concubine!female reader. smut, pwp. exhibitionism. size difference. dumbification \\ objectification. has two c.ocks. hair pulling. use of spit (yeah ik i wouldnt write for it but its sukuna). breeding themes. overstimulation. reader gets called ‘little girl, slut’. sukuna’s a menace and loves to create drama between his concubines

“shut up. i don’t care if they’re here or not,” sukuna grunts, tightening his grip on your fleshy thighs as his lower cock slams in and out your sloppy cunt without much thought. the sound of pruning shears cutting off branches is easily overwhelmed by the lewd noises of skin slapping against skin.

you feel sorry for those servants who’re just doing their job tending to the garden. none of them dare to look your way. they’re sweating, eyes solely focused on the branches they’re cutting, acting like they are not hearing the sinful moans and grunts in the distance. if they look, they’re dead. that much is known.

everything is blurry to you. all you can manage to do is let out a string of pleasure filled whines. your body is easily overpowered and held up against the harsh wood of the nearby wall. your thighs are spread in an awfully painful way, your knees up to your chest. quite literally folded in half.

“i said eyes on me, y’ fuckin’ slut,” sukuna barks. he does not have the patience today. you breaking the intense eye contact with him only worsens his mood. one of his veiny hands tug at your hair. the others hold you up—not allowing you to even think of getting back on your feet until your tight cunt is done milking him for what he’s worth.

you gasp and sukuna takes the chance to grab your jaw with yet another free hand. “open y’r mouth,” his hips do not still for even a second. they roll and ground against yours, the surrounding skin near his pelvis stained with your wet juices. he could smell it. just as nasty and dirty as he wants it to be.

you part your lips and keep them like that, not wanting to piss sukuna off even more. he grins at the sight of your red tongue instinctively rolling out like the obedient little girl you are. he spits right into your mouth, “swallow.”

you do so without second thought. the warm liquid trickles down your throat. sukuna watches in satisfaction, drilling into you until your insides are complete mush. you’re drooling over yourself already—clearly having lost control over your rationality.

you sniffle and try to hold onto sukuna’s biceps. your small fingers curl around the shape of them, nails digging into his flesh. every time you think sukuna’s finally letting up, he only increases his inhuman pace. “my l-lord, ‘s too much,” you cry out. your body could only handle so much pleasure before it’d break down. your pussy is convulsing around his girthy cock, feeling his other sliding back and forth over your sensitive clit.

the king of curses shuts you up with a hiss. his bottom set of eyes is focused on the impressive scene of your tiny pussy swallowing his cock so easily. he’s feeling proud of the fact that he’s molded you into the perfect concubine for him and his carnal pleasure.

sukuna has fucked you silly enough times to know how to get you under his spell. his fingers brush over your hard nipples, grabbing the squishy flesh of your tits as they bounce with each of his thrusts. he leans his head down towards yours. his rough, raspy voice makes your body heat up, “no, no. it’s never too much for my little girl, right? she can easily take ‘nother load f’me.”

your breath hitches and sukuna realises it worked. he knows just what to say to manipulate you into giving in. so he can fuck you senseless for how long he wants. you’re a sucker for the fact that he calls you his. that’s what you are—you’re his woman. only his and no one else’s. the claim of ownership makes your pussy clench.

“y-yes, my lord. i can take another, i can,” you breathe out, head swaying from side to side, not mentally able anymore to keep up with sukuna’s intense libido. yet, your body is still active, squeezing around sukuna’s dick as he promised you more of his precious cum.

the king of curses snickers, amused by just how fast you gave in. “that’s what i thought, hah,” he’s realised that his hold on you knows no bounds. you’re his little toy. the only one he wants to ravish these days. and the only one worth of carrying his seed.

you’re still thinking about the way he’s called you ‘his little girl’. it’s driving you closer to the edge. you start to get louder, completely ignoring your inner thoughts that begged you to have some decorum; to try and hide the fact that you’re getting slutted out in the courtyard.

there’s not much hiding it anyway since the servants have a clear understanding of what’s going on behind them. “mghh, please—please need more!” you mewl and sukuna listens. his red eyes darken with desire as you get into it. he loves to experience that lust driven side of yours. a complete opposite to your usual formal and shy self.

“louder, c’mon. let them know i’m fucking you good,” sukuna sneers, enjoying the mind games he is playing with you. you’re too cockdrunk to even notice. the them in his sentence refers to his other concubines. he knows that you’re secretly craving to get revenge on them and show them just how well you get dicked down by him every single day.

unlike them, who rarely get graced by his touch. that is, when you’re unavailable.

you do as told and increase the volume of your erotic moans, letting everyone around the estate know what you’re getting up to. not like anyone could interfere. sukuna wouldn’t dare let them live a second after.

“that’s it, yeah,” the sorcerer grunts and rams his length repeatedly into you, cursing at the way you’re gripping him so tightly. you’re so dripping wet that he slips out of you for a second. he moves his hips, angling them better to slam back inside of you.

however, you’re one step ahead. your shaky hand reaches down between your legs and you quickly guide his tip to your entrance, urging him to push between your moist folds again. “nasty fuckin’ girl,” sukuna scoffs at your desperation, though secretly thrives off it. he switches cocks and shoves the upper one into your cunt.

you gasp. you’re so used to him to the point that you could sense the difference between his dicks. the upper one has more veins and is a tad bit girthier. you hiccup and nearly choke on your own moans and spit from the change of pace and dicks. “ngh, ‘tis so deep, my lord—” you whine loudly and your hands move to hold your breasts, stopping them from painfully jiggling around in every direction.

sukuna hums in content as he continues his rough thrusts. he can feel his balls twitch and clench, ready to shoot his sperm all up in your womb like you deserve. though, he doesn’t want to end this moment too quickly. he wants to extend it.

“c’mere,” sukuna grumbles and stops pounding your poor, aching cunt. he stills his dick inside you and allows you to cling onto his tall stature, lifting you away from the wall. he silently urges you to wrap your legs around his waist so he could carry you.

the robes of your kimono get left behind on the patch of grass near the wall of the main house. there’s a few droplets of white liquid that’s stained the grass, right where sukuna and you were standing at seconds ago.

you don’t think about anything anymore as you babble about how full you felt with his cock all the way in you. the fat tip brushes against your cervix with each step sukuna takes towards his next destination.

“keep talkin’ to me, doll. tell me how good it feels to take my cock,” he grins smugly as he carries your little body like a trophy into the main building—not paying mind to any maids who he passes by. they’re shocked by the sight of their lady in such a state, though are only able to bow at the two of you.

sukuna finally stops in front of the dinner table. the same table you always have dinner at with him and his other women. he places your back against the surface, big hands holding you down by your hips. “there we go,” he coos mockingly, seeing how you’re completely fucked out, yet still needing more of him.

the king of curses has his own twisted reasons of bringing you here. looking outside of the window, you notice how the sun is starting to set. that’s also the moment you realise his hidden motive.

the other concubines will sooner or later gather at the dining hall to eat supper. they’d expect a peaceful meal, though instead, they’ll be greeted by the sight of their dear lord screwing his favorite. it’ll be a painful blow to them.

which is exactly what the ruthless man wants to achieve.

sukuna licks his lips and all of his eyes focus on you solely, “gonna enjoy my dinner a bit earlier t’day, yeah?”

CR. STTORU 2024

#sttoru writes.#jjk smut #jjk x reader #sukuna smut #sukuna x reader #jjk x you #sukuna x you #jjk x y/n #sukuna x y/n

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the-cimmerians · 3 months

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It's 2024. I have been participating in fandom for 40 years. This is a ramble commemorating some history I've experienced along the way.

In 1984, I attended my first convention, and made a beeline for the one long row of covered tables in the Dealer's Room that was, according to the whispered lore of my friends, 'the one'. "um", I said, very suavely and coherently, except for how it was totally the opposite of those things, "I'm here for the... for the, uh. For-"

"Come around here," the man behind the table said with exhausted ennui, so I went around, and he lifted up the table skirt next to him and pointed to rows and rows of boxes underneath the line of tables. "It's all under here."

It was all under there. Along with about five older ladies with glasses, graying hair, cardigans. Flipping through slash zines and chatting in whispered voices like old friends (which of course they were). I noticed one of them had the good sense to be wearing kneepads. I was still too young and ablebodied to need kneepads when crawling on a carpeted floor, but I immediately found her preparedness skills to be both impressive and hot. "You're new," one of the ladies whispered to me--a bit warily, which made sense. "Are you sure you're in the right place?"

In the faint light (the kneepads lady had also come prepared with a flashlight, additional practicality hotness points for her) I grabbed a comb-bound book with a heavy line art piece on the cover, featuring a musclebound Captain Kirk getting righteously and enthusiastically plowed by a stern-yet-ebullient Spock. "This," I said, pointing helpfully at the cover, like I was trying to make myself understood in a language I had only the vaguest knowledge of. "I'm here for this."

Outside at the convention, most of the attendees were wearing large homemade circular pins that shrieked 'K/S is BS!!!'1. But underneath the table, we reveled in the forbidden.

***

In 1985, I fell very hard for Starsky & Hutch fandom. Which was simply referred to at the time as 'the other fandom', because there were only two. We were upstarts. Many fannish elders predicted that it was just a phase.

***

The 'circulating library' was a massive stack of barely-legible pages that smelled strongly of mimeograph ink. When you were on the list, you would write stories while you waited for your turn, and when the big box was mailed to you, you would read everything (new finds, old favorites), add your own sloppily-typed or hastily-mimeographed stories, and then mail the whole thing to the next person. For me, at the time, it was an extremely expensive indulgence--but my favorite one.

***

By 1990, slash fandom had grown enough that I no longer knew everyone in it, which was both thrilling and a bit daunting. A young woman at a convention waited for me after a panel I was part of (I think it was 'writing impactful smut' or something like that), and said she had a question she didn't want to ask in a group setting. I'd heard that before. I said that's fine, go ahead and ask; and she came out with: "Why do you have to be gay?"

I blinked. "Is... that a problem?"

She looked annoyed. "Yes, because your stories are on all the recommendation lists and in all the top zines, but if you're gay and I read something you wrote and I get hot from it that makes me gay, and I'm not gay."

"Wow." I grinned, I couldn't help it. It probably made me look very predatory-dyke-about-to-score-a-toaster. Whatever, it was enough to make her back away from me fast.

When I thought about it later that night, I wondered what it would be like not to be the only queer person in slash fandom.

***

By 1997, slash started appearing on the internet. Many fannish elders claimed it was the death knell of slash fandom, or dismissed it as 'just a phase'.

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Anyway, I wrote all this for myself as a commemoration of sorts, but if you took the time to read it--thank you. Love you, fandom. I always will.

1 In those days, m/m fandom was known as 'slash', which grew from the fannish shorthand where 'K&S' meant a story of Kirk and Spock having adventures or tribulations or what have you, and 'K/S' meant a story of Kirk and Spock getting it on (Kirk divided by Spock or Spock into Kirk--it was mathy fannish humor and I was into it then and I still am now). Slash was decidedly unpopular in the fannish world in 1984, and there was a concerted effort to force slash authors, artists, and fans out of 'mainstream' fannish public life. Hence, under the table.

#fannish shenanigans #fandom history #rare ass personal post

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