I forgot to eat dinner.
I feel on the verge of something breaking inside, with getting such inadequate sleep lately. I'm somewhere between laughing at the absurdity and misty at feeling helpless.
This is so silly. I know this is my own bad habits. It feels unreal though. I can't focus enough to get the right words out.
Maybe I should take tomorrow off. Sometimes I just need to reset myself by sleeping all day.
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I'm trying out the morbid depressed Luma thing that came to me in a dream last night.
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you guys ever just get random song ideas just like-
i've painted this picture in my head.
of red soft roses,
and their stems.
a mockingbird, calls out your name,
a thorny rose, can help you grow,
a perfect thought,
a destined wind,
a crack thats bound to break.
like a whisper of the wind,
or a shadow of the light.
when everyone,
hears their name,
shakes a hand,
grabs their cap,
throws it all,
way up high,
a crack thats bound..
to break.
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Hey, someone come play with my hair and tell me I'm doing a good job please
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@buddhawithoutorgans replied to your post “Hi Frank, here's a picture of Palden Lhamo. She's a Buddha and so seeing her is said to plant the seed of enlightenment, perhaps...”
You are so welcome
thanks! (Also just in case it was helpful for you: I do not think of myself as depressed -- there are periods of low energy and bad moods but those periods do not last for very long and my moods do not last for very long either. But, like most people, I use various psychological tools to handle my emotional life, and "depression" is one of those.
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it really is crazyyyyy how much January they managed to fit into this January
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Anyway aside from that, I have been validated. She admitted she didn't know what to do with me or how staying there was helpful to me (aside from avoiding homeless and couch surfing) since I don't display "acute symptomatology" in my day to day life and am seemingly not clinically depressed nor anxious so aside from trying out stuff for the sleep disturbances, both the treatment and my stay here are useless. And what I need is psychotherapy. Which I'm still not getting. But she finally sent a request for me for the psychotrauma therapy.
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It's not even 7pm but. What if I shower and climb into bed.
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