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truly-sincerely · 2 months

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Okay let's try this again from the top (Now with AO3 link)

Dark Star Falling 1 - hot and cold

This is gonna be:

reasonably high fidelity to game canon

starting in act 3, at Wyrm's Rock Fortress

a series of vignettes, mostly between canon scenes

an agender/tiefling durge x astarion

mostly about dealing with intense durgetash feelings

Elient 22

“So… Thank you. For being that evil bastard.”

Darling is only half paying attention. Astarion can see the wheels turning in their head–an expression which has, in the past, foretold some of their more elaborate crimes. It was easy to see how the party had made it this far–with Darling doing the battle math and checking for exits as casually as breathing. They aren’t like any bard Astarion has ever met.

Even their aggravating predilection for rescuing every pathetic urchin and bedraggled gnome they come across is only a minor inconvenience in the larger scheme of playing their enemies off each other and picking off whoever’s left. Darling always seems to find a way to make a profit off of even the most pathetic victims.

Karlach has stormed off to the far end of the hall. Darling’s gaze follows her thru the crowd. Wyll is standing nearby waiting impatiently to talk to his father, or what’s left of him.

“Hey, Star? Do me a favor?”

“Whatever you need, precious bhaal-babe,” Astarion says, sliding into Darling’s field of view. Darling snickers in spite of themself and paws his chest, eliciting a self-satisfied smile from the vampire. He’s known about Darling’s heritage for all of ten minutes and he’s already teasing them about it.

The revelation that they’re Bhaalspawn and one of the architects of the Absolute hoax is certainly a shock but the more he thinks about it, the more it makes sense. Darling has always been hot and cold–not one and then the other, but both simultaneously. Playful, dangerous, and insatiable. A creature that acts wounded to lure predators in and then snaps them up.

“Talk to Ravengard with Wyll, would you?” they ask, looking back in the direction of the Grand Duke as tho not sure he’ll still be there. Ravengard is standing to the side of the throne, looking like little more than one of the many Fists strewn about the hall.

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but all that’s beneath that eminently smooth pate is a tadpole.”

“Then talk to the tadpole,” Darling snaps, and then their expression softens into something apologetic. “Maybe Wyll can get thru to him. I dunno. And tell Karlach to go back to camp, please.”

“That’s probably for the best. Wyll had to physically restrain her when Gortash was calling you his ‘nearest and dearest’,” he titters. “I haven’t seen her this angry since she was turning that Paladin of Tyr into paste.”

“If I find out I had something to do with Gortash betraying her I’m going to throw myself into the Chionthar,” Darling says, and they have such a pained look on their face that Astarion is overwhelmed by an alien desire to say something gentle. Fortunately, Darling turns and walks away before he can embarrass himself.

– – –

The Archduke is just standing there, surveying the nobles as they mingle. Darling can hear one of the patriars complaining about cheese. Gortash doesn’t have a tadpole, but Darling thinks he’s wearing the same expression that they’ve seen on their companions when one is making use of their parasites–eyes unfocused, almost but not quite nodding, listening to nothing, generally distant. As they watch him they think they can see him subvocalizing. He’s connected to someone or something telepathically.

Darling reads the Weave around him. He’s protected by multiple enchantments from his equipment and otherwise. Magic that grants him more presence, more authority, more confidence. Too much confidence. He’s drunk on it.

His languid gaze passes over Darling. His eyes meet theirs and his expression changes–his smile changes–it moves up into his eyes. Darling’s breath catches as he holds their gaze.

They catch themself making battle plans and–realizing that their best course of action would be to lay down cover and let Karlach get in his face and chop him to pieces before he can invoke the powers of his god–they let slip the tiniest of smiles on one side of their mouth. His expression shifts again. They see recognition in his look. He’s reading them too.

Darling whispers an almost silent expletive to themself, covering their face with a hand, pretending to brush stray hair out of their eyes. Suddenly he’s standing before them.

“Follow me up to my office,” he commands, and then, seeing their eyes narrow, adds in a softer tone, “We could be good for each other.”

“What will you tell me?” they ask stiffly. He looks down at the creak of leather as Darling’s glove tightens around the grip of their blade. Gortash shifts closer as if to shield Darling’s indiscretion from sight, but who’s sight? They glance over at Astarion and Wyll who are engrossed in whatever Ravengard is saying. Gortash moves his hand over Darling’s, brushing his fingertips across their knuckles. He smells like vanilla. Their voice cracks as they whisper, “I don’t know you.”

“Join me upstairs and we can use that dagger for whatever you like,” he proposes. Darling’s body responds with what feels like the expenditure of every chemical at its disposal. They stumble half a step back, suddenly keenly aware of an oven-like heat between his body and theirs. Gortash wonders pleasantly at their outsized reaction.

“Is this guy bothering you, darling?” Astarion’s voice comes from behind Darling moments before he touches their back gently.

“Yes!,” they respond, loud and shrill. “I mean no. No! Gods...”

Gortash and Astarion take a moment to size each other up while Darling recovers their composure. Astarion is accustomed to Darling’s occasional fits of nausea and twitching, and from observing Gortash’s demeanor in the moment, he is as well. It seems he really does know Darling as well as he claims to.

It doesn’t last long. Darling straightens up and turns their body into Astarion’s and says, “We’re going back to camp.” Astarion links an arm around Darling’s and leads them toward the door. Wyll follows them out, looking back at Gortash and leveling a particularly diabolic stinky eye his way.

Gortash watches the trio of adventurers exit, still wearing that smug smile.

They’re alive and they’re still themself, more or less.

#bg3 spoilers #bg3 fanfic #dark star falling #durgetash #durgestarion #durge #gortash #astarion #I'm leaving the first draft up #it's much looser than this version #I think I've found my voice/style a lot better with this draft #but it's a bit leaner/more serious than the first draft #so I won't be upset if you like the old ones better

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falderaletcetera · 9 months

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come to think of it another reason I'm biased towards nine might be because we never reach such beautiful casual queer vibes as the doctor + rose + jack situation again, at least not as far as I've watched. like I'm honestly not that much of a shipper but that kiss scene DOES things to me. and part of that is how loosely defined the relationship seems to be, at least maybe from jack's perspective. I can't rightly say it was wholly romantic in canon, but it sure was something - yes, rose flirted with jack way more than the doctor did when they first met, but the doctor even just being chill about jack kissing him feels significant - and I do love a quasi-romantic loosely-defined Something.

#doctor who #falderal speaks #I have stills from the jack+rose and jack+doctor kisses because I'm. normal about it #and I think we avoid seeing the doctor's face during or right after because they didn't want to shock the viewers too much?#if we don't see the doctor's face or reaction it can be waved off as just a Jack Being Jack thing #and it leaves us this sort of... almost plausible denability almost ambiguity #and again that may just be the vibe jack brings to it #it honestly makes me a little sad that he feels so different in torchwood #because I almost wanna say that pre-torchwood jack is maybe just LIKE this with his close friendships #maybe he comfortably straddles/ignores the line between friendship and romance when that's safe and welcome #(or else just falls into that with rose and the doctor specifically)#and maybe he's just lived through so much by torchwood (or lived so long in such a restrictive culture)#that he just. doesn't do that anymore. can't.#those are my feelings on it at least!#I haven't strayed into the fandom at ALL I just grew up with the show so nobody read this as reacting to any trends in the fandom pls #anyway apparently I'm mostly feral about the relationships I can think about and ship in a queerplatonic way #which will be a surprise to absolutely no-one who knows me from fandom stuff #but I hadn't thought to think about these three that way before. and it's a treat.#drafted last night just posted today #(like this was probably the first queer character and queer kiss I saw on screen and it was a nationally beloved family-friendly show)#(I'm basically obligated not to be normal about it)

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kakusu-shipping · 12 days

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Sometimes I play a Pokemon Game and don't want to make a new S/I for it but do want to interact with it's story and characters.

So here are some Wandering Protagonists I aged up and moved across Regions for funsies.

#Emile's Arts #Pokemon Self Insert #I still haven't fully decided what I'm doing for BW2 #Honestly the protags for BW2 are great on their own so I'm almost okay just leaving it to Rosa maybe #Maybe make her a biiit more of an OC and give my draft S/I story to her #That'd probably work better #I did have fun aging up my Sun/Moon Protag he's one of my favorites design wise #Silly little guy <3 #More Pokemon S/Is to come I'm working on some things #I wanna redraw my Masters Rocketsona and Sword/Shield S/Is of course #And I'm also designing my Monster Mind S/I for the first time #Having fun arting #EVENTUALLY I'd like to color these and add info #Like what F/Os they correlate to and what not #But that's an after I'm done character designing the rest kind of thing #God I love sketching and designing <3 #Anyway ask about them if you want #I'd appreciate it!

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arklay · 1 year

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DANI HAINES x CLAIRE REDFIELD / template.

#mine.#pair: dani x claire #oc: dani #click for better quality ♡#i was originally going to upload both the claire and carlos ones in the same post but their colours clash together i feel so i'll leave it #for now (i mean i still need to get a picture for him cause it's hard finding hd ones of his face model)#anyway!! the cooking one. i've talked about dani and cooking lmao but i also feel like claire is like... they are microwave chefs. or order #takeout. they are not good cooks lmao and good for them honestly!! like i have many thoughts with claire but i won't ramble too too much in #the tags because we all know how i get!! also they both spoil each other but dani is like. a lot. she's... she's a lot. font is supposed to #be similar to made in heaven logo on her new classic costume and jacket but ya know. just the vibes!! you understand!! and helicopter icon #for dani will be used on carlos template me thinks but butterfly for now. couldn't find nice bird ones but i mean. they are both her lil #motifs so it's fine!! but yes now you know what i mean when i was saying their colours are like a watermelon and i'm kinda obsessed with it #OH also dani's jealousy level is higher than both claire's and carlos' which is so funny to me because like they are in a v polycule so #those two are just friends and she's the one with two partners and yet she's the more jealous one. okay dani. i love her #the shut up kiss makes me go insane though... looking at first to confess and first to kiss and gestures vaguely. i'm normal about that!!!#and first thing in my edits tag that isn't blue... this is weird this is so so weird oh my god #posting this now even though people are busy and such but if it stays in my drafts any longer i'll lose my mind soooo goodnight besties hope #everyone is having good holidays!!

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throttlegainwell · 7 months

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How much editing do you do before you post fics?

#i basically post first drafts #when i go back and look at them later i notice stuff that i would have cleaned up or tightened if i had stuck it in a drawer to age #(i'm a big fan of leaving drafts to mellow in the dark before you come back to edit with fresh eyes)#but basically i've decided that this is a hobby and i don't really need to present the absolute best version of every single fic #like i care don't get me wrong #but i'd rather have it posted when i have the time than lovingly polish each one #so i can get it out of my head and move on to other stories and also all the IRL stuff i have going on #if it's plottier or covers particularly sensitive subjects then i'll probably give it a closer look #but other than that i basically proof-read and send it out the door once i feel like it's basically finished #not to say quantity over quality but I seem to have a lot of ideas lately #but not any more time to write

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pheonix-inside · 3 months

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Girl help I'm getting ambitious ideas for my book series that'll make book one probably take like twice as long to be ready to publish :(

#it's a high fantasy story #and of course with that comes the chance of using other languages #now i'm me and love languages irl so i figured i'd just take preexisting languages and use them #but then. Then.#i got the idea to take those languages and through research and a lot of bullshitting #change some of the words #so that those who know the language can tell what it's based on and how to pronounce it #but can also tell it's been stretched for good ol' fantasy originality #bc i realized i could do some cool stuff with some of the different cultures and religions in this story #after all a lot of words and phrases in various languages stem from religions and cultural values.#but also girl help this idea is cool enough im almost totally gonna do it and i can take as long as i want thank you #but i do really want to begin to share this story already its been in the works for 3 years :(#im probably gonna end up continuing to work on book 1s first draft and just leave spaces for bits in other languages to fill in later #that sounds like the fastest route

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ub-sessed · 1 year

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I am writing a little essay to post on Facebook about what I'm going through, workwise. This is a very rough first draft. I'm gonna post it here and let it sit for a day before I come back and clean it up.

(À mes followers francophones : Si vous voyez des erreurs dans mon texte, n'hésitez pas à m'avertir!)

Tourner la page

[English follows below.]

J'aimerais d'abord remercier tous mes collègues du plateau pour les presque dix ans de compagnie amicale et inspirant. C'est vous qui faites le movie magic, et vous le savez: Il n'y a rien qui est plus magique que d'assister à une équipe de feu dans le jus créer un nouveau monde au complet avec que leurs mains, leur imagination et leur collaboration. Personne d'autre ne peut comprendre c'est quoi travailler ensemble avec les gens comme vous-autres qui ont chacun leur propre super-pouvoir. Mes heures sur le plateau étaient les meilleurs de ma vie.

Là pour raison de santé ma vie est en plein transition.

--+--

I am intensely proud of the work I did as a script supervisor, especially of the sustained exertion it took to get that good at something that demanding, and in my second language! I feel lucky that I found my calling, that for almost a decade I got to do a job where I knew that once I got to set, all my other worries would disappear. When I was on set I was in my element, I was laser focused. I was my favourite me. I am grieving the loss of a career that I loved so much and that I worked so hard to build. (So hard. You have no idea how hard. How much effort I put into making it look easy.)

But now that I have finally acknowledged that I won't be able to go back to it, I find that I am enormously relieved. The fact is that in order to do what I did on set, I had to push myself to the very limit of my capacity when I was off set. Well beyond anything sustainable.

What a relief it is now to no longer be straining to be exceptionally good at something exceptionally difficult.

I have spent my whole life pushing myself outside of my comfort zone because that's the only way to really excel. But looking back I realize that the expectations I have set for myself have been absurd. That I have always pursued careers that were well beyond my physical capabilities, or that demanded inhumane hours, or required a level of self-discipline and self-motivation that were completely inappropriate to my temperament.

Script supervising was the closest I ever came to finding the perfect career for me, but even before I got sick, it was clear to me that the only way it would be sustainable was if I could always insist on having an assistant to do the paperwork. Very few script supervisors in the industry can demand that.

My whole life I have been told that I should be more ambitious, that something-or-other should be easy for me because I'm so smart, that if I just had the right attitude I could do things that I actually find nearly impossible. And my whole life I've felt like I was drowning.

Whenever I have tried to make a realistic assessment of my abilities and accept my limitations, I have been told that I'm being "too hard on myself" and that my "negative attitude" was what was keeping me from reaching my goals. But this misguided advice just made it harder to set healthy goals in the first place. I have spent the great majority of my adult life nowhere near my comfort zone. It was exhausting and stressful. These people were right that I should have had more self-confidence: then I would have believed that I know myself better than anybody else does.

It took being completely incapacitated by illness to realize that I have spent my entire adult life feeling inadequate for not meeting the well-meaning expectations of people with only the most superficial understanding of my situation. What a relief it is to no longer be trying to "live up to my potential".

I'm just grateful that I'm young enough that I still have a chance to build myself a life that actually goes at my own pace. A life where I put myself first.

#personal #rough draft #fuck having a career #i just want a job #definitely need to reword at least one of those push myselfs #wip #i have a lot more i want to say about how I've spent most of my life nowhere near my comfort zone #but that's a whole different essay i think #the advice to leave your comfort zone is based on the arrogant assumption that you're in your comfort zone in the first place #ok i got rid of two of the push myselfs #the two that are left kind of look like intentional repetition?#to all the people who have told me that i need to push myself harder: Do you have any idea how hard i am already pushing myself??#i have so much beef with people who assume that because something is easy for them that it must be easy for me too #or because I'm good at something they find difficult that i just also be good at things that they find easy #the buck-up encouraging You can do it! is not actually helpful if the person can't actually do it #or has to sacrifice their well-being in order to be able to do it #anyway i have spent the past couple months realizing that i put a shocking amount of effort into trying to please other people #in spite of the fact that most people see me as a hard ass who takes no bullshit

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chiropteracupola · 2 years

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returning to one of my favorite pastimes, which is Being Sad About Archie Kennedy (and writing about that, and you can read that writing right here)

#em writes stuff #hornblower #horatio hornblower #archie kennedy #surprise of surprises this is actually what the tma au turned into in the end #scraped off the ghosts and the (pre-leitner) leitner and spun what was left out for another thousand words or so #and in the end I find that I like the result much better than I was liking the first version #hopefully I'll have the inspiration to do the same with the other two hornblower fics I've had to leave in the yeast jar lately #and I'm pleased with how the header worked out as well - it's been a while since I've had the energy to make it a proper art piece #hee hoo my childhood california-missions obsession is showing through a little in this one #it's not very often that I get to work on something that I have so many Loud Memories to use for inspiration #although with my typical disregard for using them correctly it is just Gently Applied Vibes for my own fun #enough with the rambling go read the fic why don't you #(I finished this a week ago and then just Forgot and left it in my drafts because I got so caught up in writing other stuff ahaha...)

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annieshowell · 2 years

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welcome world tycho curious<3

#pascal curious #tycho curious #nh: stpsp #stpsp: curious #strangetown #sims 2 #the sims 2 #man pascal's pregnancy was the fastest in the world #but it's all my fault cuz im dumb #what happened was that i impregnated pascal and decided to speed up pregnancy with simblender #just until the first bop? happens i forgot the name of it but y'all got it #but i forgot to disable that and the pregnancy was accelerated until the second belly thing LDIROWODIOSOS #but no one cares right #i RE-impregnated* im sorry it's almost midnight now as im writing this to leave it in the drafts #and i'm practically sleeping awake

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svtskneecaps · 1 year

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btw we're dancing ever closer to a large milestone so. congrats. this is terrifying. where did you people come from. how are you still here.

#are the blogs still active #hey. hey. i'm poking you with a stick. do something.#not kpop #shut up vic #anyway i was kicking around an idea where i do like. '1k for 1k' where i post 1k of assorted drafts that died in my google drive #i'd leave it up to audience prompting but ngl i'd never get any lmfao so. it would be mostly my discretion with optional participation #it won't be for a while yet unless i can actually finish a piece for seventeen in the next six months (unlikely)#but i've been thinking about it #somehow people keep managing to find this blog which. how???#i haven't posted in a seventeen tag (purposefully) in almost a year #sorry if this is showing up in the tag btw i didn't mean to but i didn't think about it until right now and i can't edit tags rip #anyway idk where you people are coming from but you're welcome here #maybe one day i'll post writing again #i just got so averse to posting unfinished projects bc then they just. haunt me. especially if i end up needing to go back and edit #wit of the staircase and all that. i hit my stride in the second act and have to go back to fix the first #but you can't edit what's already been posted easily so. no wips leave my google drive.#plus they're mostly horridly self-serving and i'm the one being served so idk if anyone else could enjoy them #my current wip is a stress fic that developed a plot and i'm going to have to edit down the wish fulfillment if i ever post it #but that requires replacing multiple conversations and that's A Lot #anyway tag ramble over i just. think about things. wanted to check in lads.#if you're reading this i appreciate you also how the fuck did you find me #please tell me i'm genuinely so curious anon should be on no one will ever know please tell me please

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miss-ingno · 2 years

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Hi!!! I love your fic "This is how the war is won", it's amazing.

Is it still giving you problems??? I remember you saying that the last chapter was fighting you!!!

Ahhh, I’m glad to hear it! 🥰 Thank you for letting me know <3

There’s a couple different reasons why I’ve been struggling with the last chapter, including that contrary to my expectations February and March turned out to be busy and nerve-wrecking irl.

[fair warning, the next three paragraphs are very personal and kinda negative, feel free to skip]

I’m also aware of how setting this in YOHE and making it a/b/o makes it a very niche fic, neither of them are particularly popular in this fandom. I didn’t really care about that when I started writing it (around late October/early November 2021), it’s my self-indulgence project. When I decided to post it early, it was because I felt like I was losing steam on it and needed some encouragement, but I was also okay leaving it on chapter 4 for a bit. That’s the story I wanted to tell, ch1-4, everything else is loose ends plot wrap-up.

And I’m very grateful to everyone who commented, or reached out, or left kudos! But I’ve also realized that subconsciously I was holding some expectations, and in that this is how the war is won didn’t really perform as well as, say, a Weilan-centric canon divergence might.

This is no one’s fault! I recognize that posting it in Jan-Feb was a stupid idea in hindsight, since irl was in such flux that the stress of that made me flee to fandom for validation more than usual, which forced this fic to shoulder more than it should. And I realized I was feeling bad about it as I was forcing myself to write chapter 5 and kept writing myself into corners and hating it, so I dropped it for a while in favour of smaller, quick fics that could hopefully fill the function I needed at the time.

[okay, oversharing of personal negativity part over with :’)]

Now, there are three major issues I kept getting stuck on writing chapter 5:

1) Ye Zun is a brat

He kept fighting me all February, and I ended up putting all my will and energy to put up with him in No Man Left Behind, since that had a deadline -- I wrote it for the Ye Zun Week fandom event. Afterwards, I was kinda wrung out on his character, so I focussed on the other scene first.

2) a worldbuilding faux pas that my beta thankfully pointed out and led to me rewriting several chunks. I really like how it made the internal logic flow better, too!

3) the goddamn politics

I love politics in fics. I do. They’re so much fun, it’s just like, a great big web of character dynamics. The same reason I love poly fics. But I had to figure out convincing reactions from several parties for this one and how to convince them of the action I wanted them to take without like. Creating a new rebellion or big split because I’m not dealing with that x’D it needed to make sense and it wasn’t, it felt very ‘because I’m the author and say so’.

I kept running into this wall at several different points, and it didn’t help that I had written a couple snippets ahead that I adore and want to keep, but that I needed to rearrange over and over and just. Stopped feeling like I could work in.

The last of that hurdle I actually figured out how to get around (by rewriting another chunk RIP me) last week, and I put the final edits on the scene tonight! Which leaves the first half of the chapter at 4k (mind, average chapter length has been 5-5.5k so far). I’m very hopeful to wrap up Ye Zun’s part soon, too, maybe even post this month? *fingers crossed*

Thank you for being patient and still interested in the resolution of this fic! Here, have one of those snipps I didn’t wanna lose as an I’m Sorry For How Long It’s Taking:

"General Kunlun has been remiss in his duties," he said solemnly. "We are bonded, however, I have yet to receive a gift." Heipaoshi reached out, picking up the figure marking the rebel chief's position. He stared at the figurine for a long, tense moment, turning it over and over in his fingers. Finally, he looked up, meeting Kunlun's gaze with a resolute expression. "I want Zei Qiu's head."

[...] Kunlun himself only had eyes for his omega, leaning forward intently.

"I will serve it to you on a silver platter," he swore.

#WIP game #anonymous #ahhhh this god long sorry! >.<#I had a lot to say RIP #I had to write this up TWICE because tumblr killed the first draft lol #anyway I'm wordy because I'm tired and sorry #I hate leaving fics unfinished :')#because the pressure to update builds until I hate the words I'm writing #and I don't wanna post subpar garbage!#it has to be gold-star garbage at the least lol #this is how the war is won #ingno writes

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gu6chan · 7 days

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Not to name any names but i think the day i truly understood the importance of having a connected "theme" in your work is when i read this person's story and it was all this angst and drama but felt so,,, disconnected and MEANINGLESS i came out feeling the most neutral-faced and "well wtf was that all about" i ever did and when i asked if they had written it with any "theme" in mind they were like "oh i let my work speak for itself, the readers can interpret it" that's a cool idea!!!!! IF you were a reader!!!! do you have an idea on what you're WRITING about though??????

#gu6chan's musings #tl;dr - I'm certainly not saying you HAVE to have a theme by your first draft ofc but by the time that shits published please have some....#intention behind all that????#otherwise it's just jangling sad events; characters; etc in front of another person's face saying 'ISNT THAT SOOOO SAD AND COOL AND AWESOME'#and ofc there's a risk of your theme NOT resonating with an audience and them going 'well it's all meaningless anyways'#but 'Leave the interpretation up to the audience' works a LOT better when they have a built intention they can make their interpretations #off in the first place!!!!#this convo recently popped into memory again and i figured I'd try putting it both into words #for myself but also maybe someone else might have had the same question #'themes are nice; but WHY are they so important???' question answered: saying all those events happened just cause you thought it would be #cool and nice could on SOME level even be a theme/intention in itself - 'shit happens without reasoning' but without the conscious effort to #ACKNOWLEDGE that or any theme at all and just having these things happen... for the sake of happening kinda will strike some readers as #pointless after a bit

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burntoutdaydreamer · 6 months

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Things That May Be Causing Your Writer's Block- and How to Beat Them

I don't like the term 'Writer's Block' - not because it isn't real, but because the term is so vague that it's useless. Hundreds of issues all get lumped together under this one umbrella, making writer's block seem like this all-powerful boogeyman that's impossible to beat. Worse yet, it leaves people giving and receiving advice that is completely ineffective because people often don't realize they're talking about entirely different issues.

In my experience, the key to beating writer's block is figuring out what the block even is, so I put together a list of Actual Reasons why you may be struggling to write:

(note that any case of writer's block is usually a mix of two or more)

Perfectionism (most common)

What it looks like:

You write one sentence and spend the next hour googling "synonyms for ___"

Write. Erase. Write. Rewrite. Erase.

Should I even start writing this scene when I haven't figured out this one specific detail yet?

I hate everything I write

Cringing while writing

My first draft must be perfect, or else I'm a terrible writer

Things that can help:

Give yourself permission to suck

Keep in mind that nothing you write is going to be perfect, especially your first draft

Think of writing your first/early drafts not as writing, but sketching out a loose foundation to build upon later

People write multiple drafts for a reason: write now, edit later

Stop googling synonyms and save that for editing

Write with a pen to reduce temptation to erase

Embrace leaving blank spaces in your writing when you can't think of the right word, name, or detail

It's okay if your writing sucks. We all suck at some point. Embrace the growth mindset, and focus on getting words on a page

Lack of inspiration (easiest to fix)

What it looks like:

Head empty, no ideas

What do I even write about???

I don't have a plot, I just have an image

Want to write but no story to write

Things that can help:

Google writing prompts

If writing prompts aren't your thing, instead try thinking about what kind of tropes/genres/story elements you would like to try out

Instead of thinking about the story you would like to write, think about the story you would like to read, and write that

It's okay if you don't have a fully fleshed out story idea. Even if it's just an image or a line of dialogue, it's okay to write that. A story may or may not come out of it, but at least you got the creative juices flowing

Stop writing. Step away from your desk and let yourself naturally get inspired. Go for a walk, read a book, travel, play video games, research history, etc. Don't force ideas, but do open up your mind to them

If you're like me, world-building may come more naturally than plotting. Design the world first and let the story come later

Boredom/Understimulation (lost the flow)

What it looks like:

I know I should be writing but uugggghhhh I just can'tttttt

Writing words feels like pulling teeth

I started writing, but then I got bored/distracted

I enjoy the idea of writing, but the actual process makes me want to throw my laptop out the window

Things that can help:

Introduce stimulation: snacks, beverages, gum, music such as lo-fi, blankets, decorate your writing space, get a clickity-clackity keyboard, etc.

Add variety: write in a new location, try a new idea/different story for a day or so, switch up how you write (pen and paper vs. computer) or try voice recording or speech-to-text

Gamify writing: create an arbitrary challenge, such as trying to see how many words you can write in a set time and try to beat your high score

Find a writing buddy or join a writer's group

Give yourself a reward for every writing milestone, even if it's just writing a paragraph

Ask yourself whether this project you're working on is something you really want to be doing, and be honest with your answer

Intimidation/Procrastination (often related to perfectionism, but not always)

What it looks like:

I was feeling really motivated to write, but then I opened my laptop

I don't even know where to start

I love writing, but I can never seem to get started

I'll write tomorrow. I mean next week. Next month? Next month, I swear (doesn't write next month)

Can't find the time or energy

Unreasonable expectations (I should be able to write 10,000 words a day, right????)

Feeling discouraged and wondering why I'm even trying

Things that can help:

Follow the 2 min rule (or the 1 paragraph rule, which works better for me): whenever you sit down to write, tell yourself that you are only going to write for 2 minutes. If you feel like continuing once the 2 mins are up, go for it! Otherwise, stop. Force yourself to start but DO NOT force yourself to continue unless you feel like it. The more often you do this, the easier it will be to get started

Make getting started as easy as possible (i.e. minimize barriers: if getting up to get a notebook is stopping you from getting started, then write in the notes app of your phone)

Commit to a routine that will work for you. Baby steps are important here. Go with something that feels reasonable: every day, every other day, once a week, twice a week, and use cues to help you remember to start. If you chose a set time to write, just make sure that it's a time that feels natural to you- i.e. don't force yourself to writing at 9am every morning if you're not a morning person

Find a friend or a writing buddy you can trust and talk it out or share a piece of work you're proud of. Sometimes we just get a bit bogged down by criticism- either internal or external- and need a few words of encouragement

The Problem's Not You, It's Your Story (or Outline (or Process))

What it looks like:

I have no problems writing other scenes, it's just this scene

I started writing, but now I have no idea where I'm going

I don't think I'm doing this right

What's an outline?

Drowning in documents

This. Doesn't. Make. Sense. How do I get from this plot point to this one?!?!?! (this ColeyDoesThings quote lives in my head rent free cause BOY have I been there)

Things That Can Help:

Go back to the drawing board. Really try to get at the root of why a scene or story isn't working

A part of growing as a writer is learning when to kill your darlings. Sometimes you're trying to force an idea or scene that just doesn't work and you need to let it go

If you don't have an outline, write one

If you have an outline and it isn't working, rewrite it, or look up different ways to structure it

You may be trying to write as a pantser when you're really a plotter or vice versa. Experiment with different writing processes and see what feels most natural

Study story structures, starting with the three act structure. Even if you don't use them, you should know them

Check out Ellen Brock on YouTube. She's a professional novel editor who has a lot of advice on writing strategies for different types of writers

Also check out Savage Books on YouTube (another professional story editor) for advice on story structure and dialogue. Seriously, I cannot recommend this guy enough

Executive Dysfunction, Usually From ADHD/Autism

What it looks like:

Everything in boredom/understimulation

Everything in intimidation/procrastination

You have been diagnosed with and/or have symptoms of ADHD/Autism

Things that can help:

If you haven't already, seek a diagnosis or professional treatment

Hire an ADHD coach or other specialist that can help you work with your brain (I use Shimmer; feel free to DM me for a referral)

Seek out neurodiverse communities for advice and support

Try body doubling! There's lot's of free online body doubling websites out there for you to try. If social anxiety is a barrier, start out with writing streams such as katecavanaughwrites on Twitch

Be aware of any sensory barriers that may be getting in the way of you writing (such as an uncomfortable desk chair, harsh lighting, bad sounds)

And Lastly, Burnout, Depression, or Other Mental Illness

What it looks like:

You have symptoms of burnout or depression

Struggling with all things, not just writing

It's more than a lack of inspiration- the spark is just dead

Things that can help:

Forget writing for now. Focus on healing first.

Seek professional help

If you feel like it, use writing as a way to explore your feelings. It can take the form of journaling, poetry, an abstract reflection of your thoughts, narrative essays, or exploring what you're feeling through your fictional characters. The last two helped me rediscover my love of writing after I thought years of depression had killed it for good. Just don't force yourself to do so, and stop if it takes you to a darker place instead of feeling cathartic

#writing #creative writing #writer problems #writing advice #writing community #writing a book #writing problems #novel writing #on writing #writing tips #writing help #writers on tumblr #writers block #female writers #writers of tumblr #writers blog #adhd writer

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bluenotemagpie · 4 months

Text

"editing this fic will be fun & easy" i told myself "i'm just going to retype it and add some more grounding in the setting and finesse some of the character arcs and flesh out the middle" i told myself "i don't need to change that much about the opening chapters" i told myself

and then i tripped and rearranged some of the scenes in the opening chapters and now i think i might actually combine two of the opening chapters together and and and

(i am having fun but it is, uh.... not the light touch edits i originally expected to do at this point of the process lmao)

#raptor writes #my dw magnum opus #i will leave the first draft versions up on ao3 bc i'm still very fond of them & would like to be able to read people's comments etc #but i'll end up just posting this as a new fic methinks rather than updated the old chapters #it'll be good though! there aren't any super-drastic changes - just changing to make exposition + pacing flow better & add tension etc #i just finished rewriting the paris chapter & i'm excited for people to read it #which is always a good sign imo

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zhongrin · 4 months

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festered wounds

— when you’ve never been the first choice your whole life, it’s hard to accept the possibility that you could be loved.

✼ characters ┈ zhongli, al haitham, wriothesley

✼ tags ┈ gn!reader, this is more of a vent drabble, hurt with comfort, reader with massive insecurity issues, implied past trauma, slight blood & gore in the portrayal of ‘hurt’

✼ a/n ┈ this…. got really personal, haha. i wrote this in a bad headspace, so apologies if it got depressing or if it’s of a low quality. i didn't want to have this in my drafts and i certainly don't want to bring it to 2024 so i'm just posting this now.

ᴏᴜʀ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴍᴇɴᴜ (ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ) ✼ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱʜɪᴘ (ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ)

“i’m sorry.”

zhongli’s heart dropped at the words escaping your lips. this was certainly the most unexpected response you could give to his confession, seeing the promising recent developments in your relationship — and so celestia forgive him, he had to pause to gather his thoughts. this made you fidget even more under his gaze, and so you succumbed to your frazzled nerves to continue in a more panicked voice.

“i’m sorry, mr. zhongli, i know you’re not the type to resort to deceit or find joy in toying with people’s feelings, but i’m just— i can’t—” you trailed off, feeling your chest tighten in pain.

“please, hold your tongue for a moment,” the refined man held out one of his hand to settle onto your shoulder comfortingly. his expression was a mixture of worry and confusion, eyebrows furrowing in a sign of distress. “are you saying that you… do not believe my words? you think i have malicious intentions?”

“….. i’m sorry, i’m just not used to- i’ve never-” you stumbled over your words and squeezed your eyes shut, “i’m sorry….”

zhongli watched you for a moment, observing the smallest ticks and the story behind your body language. you looked so vulnerable, like a scared animal instinctively cowering at some invisible threat. you looked as if someone had stripped away a bandage that had been haphazardly wrapped around a wound left unattended for so long, it had festered into an abomination, eating away at you slowly, even now.

belatedly, he realized that ‘someone’ was himself.

zhongli inhaled deeply, his palm leaving your shoulder. this time, he took his hands to tenderly grab your fingers, lifting them up to silently plead for your attention. your eyes were troubled and full of storms, the rain and lighting reflecting on your expression as a solemn flutter of your eyelashes and sorrowful downturn of your lips. the slight tremble of your body reflected the silent call for help from a blemished heart that never had the courage to forget.

“my dearest. i see the pain you have gone through. i have yet to know the tales that had marred your heart, but i want you to know that i am willing to be the pair of ears you tell your grievances to, and you can be rest assured that they will be safe with me. i know my words will not be enough to convince you otherwise at this moment… however, you must forgive my impatience, for it stems out of genuine love. i simply must humbly ask once again—”

“— please, give me a chance to heal you.”

“a-are you sure you want me?”

out of the 18 different responses he anticipated, al haitham did not expect this. however, his surprise merely manifested in the rising of both of his eyebrows and the subtle shift on his legs.

“unlike the consensus the public seemed to have one-sidedly agreed on, i am not foolish enough in the matter of romance as to confess to someone i do not hold deep affection and great care for,” he said in the same tone as the moment he asked if you would consider taking your relationship into the ‘officially dating’ phase, “is it not obvious? kaveh claimed i was ‘laying it on thick’ and cyno had noted of how i treat you better than how i treat the dendro archon.”

“oh….”

“….”

you thought you had gotten used to al haitham’s stare with how much you both had been hanging out, but right now you couldn’t seem to lift your head. the scholar crossed his arms, waiting patiently for your response. you were both gratuitous and dreading his resilience.

“i-i still think you could do better, though. i mean, look at you! you’re so fit, so wouldn’t you feel better if your partner is more of the sporty type? and you’re the top graduate of the haravatat darshan, so you would pair better with someone smarter…. a-and someone like me will just drag you down; aesthetically speaking, i… uh, leave much to be desired while you’re… you know…”

you spoke of such illogical assumptions and erroneous advices that he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. you spoke of belittling yourself as if you were used to riding on the rails of insurmountably low dip of the self-esteem cliff for years. you spoke of these things as if you were repeating words someone told you at least once in your life.

and it angered him.

but he wasn’t angry at you. he was angry for you.

funny how empathy wasn’t his strong suit, and yet he jumped on the bandwagon as easily as an otter taking off into the waters the moment it came to you and your emotions.

“i care not for such shallow qualifications when it comes to seeking a partner. your presence triggers the relevant hormones that make me feel relaxed and comfortable, and my mind spontaneously seek for your attention. it’s only logical that i seek for an arrangement that would ensure these pleasant things to happen and develop further.”

“you’re the best choice for a partner, simply because i wish to spend the rest of my life with you; and i think that's enough.”

“i don’t think i’m a good choice for you…”

wriothesley looked as if you had pinpointed his weak point in a boxing match and delivered a straight jab right onto it. his lips slacked open and his body froze as he tried to process your words, the meaning behind it, the—

he inhaled deeply and punched his own fist into his palm, stretching his jaw with a growl before a darker tone took over his voice.

“alright, who’s been talking shit? let me at them. it won’t be manslaughter if they don’t die, right?”

he watched as your nervously fiddling fingers stopped twisting around each other, your eyes widened in shock and alarm at his words. briefly, he praised himself inwardly for being able to switch your mood at the snap of his fingers. now if only he could do that, but instead of surprise-and-horror, it could turn into surprise-and-joy instead…

“what?! wait- no! no one said that, i ju—”

“then is your own head telling you that?”

“it’s—” you gulped, gaze slowly breaking away.

he sensed a secret kept safe under the heaviest chains and locks. pain that had nearly torn up that warm heart of yours, shoved into the furthest part of you in a desperate attempt to save yourself; to silence the damned screams and the river of curses that would have made you self-destruct. he saw the remains of the thousands of needles that had embedded itself deep inside your worn heart a long time ago, and yet still it beat and struggled to not bleed out and drown you in its venomous blood.

he saw a heart as scarred as his skin, and he understood.

“..… alright, sweetheart, listen up, and listen close.”

the man’s hands suddenly cradled your cheeks, his icy blue eyes penetrating your clouded gaze. his whole demeanor had shifted into gentle and loving, as if he was holding his entire world in the palms of his hands. he resisted the urge to kiss you when you couldn’t help but lean onto his touch, instinctively seeking comfort.

he would do you better. he would give you the kind of love you’ve yet to experience. there were so much he wanted to say, but he chose to speak of the reassurance he thought you needed most at this moment.

“i say you’re the perfect choice for me. let me prove it to you.”

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #zhongli #zhongli x reader #al haitham #al haitham x reader #wriothesley #wriothesley x reader #rin writes

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arminsumi · 7 months

Text

I WANT TO KISS YOU / キスしたい

↳ GOJO さとる + fem!reader

you and Satoru falling in love despite a language barrier.

2.9k

Chapter index

Summary : you've come to visit Japan to meet these two boys you met online. Though Satoru can't speak English and you can't speak Japanese, the two of you still fall in love. Very cute. Very cheesy. Oh no... wait is there a tension between you and his best friend, too? Oh boy...

Warnings : romantic tension with Suguru / potential love triangle, cat scratch

Note : i think of this fic a lot and i found the continuation hiding out in my drafts sooo here 👍

🍒 More from Jay : Gojo works / Gojo fave works / JJK works

Satoru blinks awake to see your face. His heart beats harder.

結局昨日は夢ではなかったのか？ Yesterday was not a dream after all?

He's not an early bird at all, but from the first day of your visit he magically woke up early as if his soul was too excited to sleep when it knew you were right there, in the flesh. No screen. Just you.

When the first day starts, it feels like you've always been together. Was there ever a screen separating the two of you? And were you really going to disappear behind one again in just a month?

今のところ、彼女はここに留まるように感じています。彼女が訪問を終えて出発するとき、私は空港で赤ん坊のように泣くことになると思います。 For now, she feels like she's here to stay. I think I'm going to cry like a baby at the airport when she leaves after her visit.

Morning routines are carried out. The sky is cloudy at first, threatening rain, and by the time you three cluster into the kitchen to make breakfast together, it starts raining.

You and Satoru banter like two cats. Suguru's morning rasp is very strong.

"Satoru... uh... sugar?" you ask, preparing to make yourself a second one and automatically making Satoru another one, since he looks still very bleary-eyed even after spending an hour freshening up in the bathroom.

"...? Yes?" he tilts his head, then you raise the sugar cube jar. "Yes. Uh... four. Thank you."

Suguru's blushing because of the cute tension between you and his best friend. It fills the whole kitchen, which already felt full with their two bodies and a third one now. Everyone keeps bumping elbows and yet not complaining about it, in fact it's enjoyable to be squished together. Maybe because you three waited so long to be together in person, you don't mind it. There's a silent, ever-present comedy in the air about the tight proximity.

You hum happily, tossing in one, two, three... four? That's a lot of sugar. "Suguru, tell Satoru he mustn't have so much sugar all the time. It's not good for his health."

Suguru laughs. "I try to tell him that every day. But his sweet tooth is incurable."

"His dentist must hate him." you smirk at Satoru, who's been looking at you blushingly after hearing his name mentioned.

彼女の声が今では一番好きな音だと思います。 I think her voice is my favorite sound now.

もう一度私の名前を言ってください。 Please say my name again.

"Satoru? Coffee?" you interrupt his lovey-dovey thoughts and he suddenly reanimates himself, because for a moment there he zoned out and just stared at you with those pretty eyes.

"Mmm... thanks." he takes the coffee from you with a noticeable timidness that you can't quite explain. There's a lot about him that's indescribable, you're having a small internal crisis; aren't you supposed to be fluent in English? And yet you can't even begin to describe just how sweet and gentle Satoru behaves. The most you can do is use metaphors that barely justify him.

"Suguru, tell her... her voice is nice, and also sorry for cuddling you in my sleep (and that she can definitely kick me away at night if it bothers her.) Also!" (the three of you head into the living room, and Suguru habitually trips over the cat who stalks under his feet too quietly to notice) "Also tell her... if it rains today, does she still want to go out? Because if we go out in the rain, she might get sick. And I don't want her to get sick on her trip. Not that I'd mind taking care of you, Y/n, of course."

Suguru lets out a long sigh and pulls a funny face. You smile amusedly.

"...It's too early to be a translator..." he grumbles in English after Satoru overloads him.

"What? C'mon tell her everything I said!"

"Let me have my coffee first. How about the two of you write to each other?" he suggests, putting the rim of the cup to his lips and sipping languidly.

"Eh, fine." Satoru pouts, and stalks off into his bedroom to get his phone.

Then, when he's in his bedroom, his chest flutters for some reason when he sees your suitcase standing there opened and emptied into the free cupboard space. He takes his phone, smiles at the homely feeling of seeing your belongings in his room, and leaves.

"Oh..." he has a sudden idea, and remembers the magnetic drawing board that's hanging in the kitchen. He and Suguru usually use it for writing reminders to each other, like get milk or you're an idiot or sometimes it has doodles of Mint the cat with sunglasses on.

So he returns to you with this magnetic drawing board, and points at it meaningfully, then holds one finger up and bows his head as he begins writing very slowly.

Suguru's checking the weather forecast and muttering sour complaints under his breath to you. "Of course it would rain for three days just when you arrive... at least by the weekend it will be clear and sunny..."

"Mmm... it's alright. A little rain never hurt nobody." you respond.

"I like your optimism." Suguru compliments flippantly at first, but then continues; "It's really uplifting. I think Satoru said something about you being a joy once, he said it really poetically but I can't recall it now."

"Aw..." you dip your head beneath your coffee cup, hiding the bashful expression on your face, which Suguru chuckles at.

And then, for a long moment, you just stare and watch Satoru writing on the board. You're completely captured in this moment, completely captivated in his enveloping presence as he sits next to you. He has slow, meticulous wrist movements. His knees press together, like he's worried that he'll invade your personal space if he sits too comfortably close to you. Funny, considering he cuddled you all night and you had no complaints about it.

He's writing very simply and neatly, just like how he texts you. You're a bit baffled by the characters he's using, though he's trying his best to avoid using any kanji knowing that you don't know a lot of it. He's sure you can figure things out by slowly pronouncing each hiragana character, or at least he hopes.

"Here." he hands you the magnetic drawing board, and then raises from the couch to go feed the cat.

"Minto-Minto... " he calls after the cat and makes a small cute sound to lure her out.

You're trying to read each hiragana character, eyes squinting a bit.

Suguru leans in close to you. He just takes a look, but the proximity for some reason gives both of you butterflies.

"Ooh... that's cute." Suguru comments after reading what Satoru wrote. His voice reaches deep in your tummy.

"Hm... I'll spell it out and... figure it out... anyways, why did you name your cat Mint?"

"Oh... well. There's two reasons. So the first..." he sets down his coffee, like he's about to tell you a great story, "Is because Satoru watched this show called Tokyo Mew Mew growing up, and he liked the character Minto. So he calls her Minto. And then I agreed on calling her that, but I call her Mint, because I hate mint the herb."

"You — haha, wait what? You call her Mint because you hate mint?"

"Yes. I hate mint, both the herb and the cat. She hates me too, clearly." Suguru raises his hand to remind you of how the cat scratched him the night before.

"Such a cute Hello Kitty sticker..." you tease.

"Thank you. Only the manliest men wear Hello Kitty Bandaids."

"How did she scratch you anyways...?"

"Oh, she likes to hang out in the washing machine if Satoru accidentally leaves it open. And when I try take her out of her comfy spot, she scratches me."

You sympathize, "Poor thing."

"What, the cat or me?" Suguru laughs.

"The cat." you lie teasingly.

"Wow! And here I thought you were being sympathetic!" he raises his brows.

You giggle and look at him, eyes finally making contact — ooh no that's bad bad bad, better break it immediately. So the two of you look away like you've both just indulged in a taboo intimacy. His stomach flips.

"Minto has been fed. She gave me cuddles." Satoru comes back into the room, and you admire the feeling he brings with him.

"No scratches?" Suguru asks.

"No, obviously, she loves me more than you." Satoru cheeks.

"Fuck you, haha."

Satoru makes his voice lower and leans to Suguru, "(Did she figure out what I wrote yet?)"

"Y/n did you figure out what he wrote?" Suguru asks.

"I'm trying so hard. What does this part mean...?"

Suguru shakes his head and puts his hands up. "Like I said, I'm not Mr Translator in the mornings."

"But you've had your coffee! Please, just this part..." you beg, and he can't deny that sweet begging. He easily folds for it, just like when Satoru begs for anything.

"Okay, where — this? Uh... Satoru your handwriting isn't usually this neat, is it...? That part means... 'voice'."

"Oh... ohhh!" you suddenly realize, and then the boys swoon over you when you pronounce the characters out loud to yourself.

"Uh... I think I know what it means..." you feel your cheeks warm up from the crown to your jawline.

あなたのこえがすき。 a-na-ta-no-ko-e-ga-su-ki.

"I like your voice, too." you respond to Satoru, and he half-gets it and gives you a thumbs up.

"Thanks."

You look at each other and then promptly look away with shy smiles.

"You two are cute." Suguru comments.

"Ahah... ahah shut up... hey, the sky has cleared up." you point out.

"Ooh... it cleared up 'cuz Satoru walked back into the room."

You awe at what he said.

"?"

"Nothing."

"Hey, Translator — (stop talking about me behind my back!)"

Suguru chuckles, "I wasn't! I was just — never mind. Let's get ready to head out."

And so you head into Satoru's bedroom to get ready, and Suguru heads into his bedroom, and Satoru himself goes into the cramped bathroom. Poor boy. He's really too tall for that archway, he bumped his head again.

彼女に花を買ってあげるべきでしょうか？それともちょっと多すぎますか？ Should I buy her flowers? Or is it a bit too much?

（なんてことだ）、なぜこのシャツには穴が開いているのでしょう？ (Oh my god), why does this shirt have holes?

The door slides open, he steps out of the bathroom half-dressed, and intends to quickly slip into Suguru's bedroom to borrow a shirt instead of awkwardly knocking on his bedroom door and disturbing you.

But oh, you know what? The cheesiest possible thing happens instead. The universe likes making Satoru's life a little more fun in odd times. So the two of you encounter each other in the hallway; you're fully clothed and he's got just pants and socks on.

He stutters once, swallows awkwardly, and even more awkwardly places his hand on your head as if to say sorry for this inconvenience.

But you laugh in response to the funny situation.

ああ、またあの美しい笑い声。 Ah, that beautiful laugh again.

"Sorry." he mutters, and disappears to go get a shirt from Suguru.

"It's okay." you reply.

The image of your pretty smile is burned in his head.

You can hear him telling Suguru something in the other room, and then you hear Suguru's muffled laugh as a response.

"(Don't laugh! I'm embarrassed! She's seen me shirtless now! No one's seen me shirtless except you!)"

"(You're such a virgin.)"

"(Say that again, I dare you.)"

"(Sorry, I don't understand you. I don't speak virgin, only English and Japanese.)"

You're wondering why Satoru sounds so embarrassed and annoyed, and then he groans down the hallway. It feels like you're their roommate, it's funny.

"Hi."

The two of you encounter each other in the hall again. This time he has a shirt, yes. And this time Suguru is there, too, and he's holding back an amused smile. He fluffs Satoru's hair as a way of embarrassing him more.

So Satoru leaves, and he leaves in such a way that it's super comedic, making you and Suguru laugh. Ooh, what a laugh that boy has; his Addam's apple shifts up and down deliciously.

"Ah... Suguru? I need help with the washing machine..."

"Yes...?"

"...this kid on the plane who sat next to me, he spilled strawberry juice all over my shirt and now it's sticky."

"But at least it smells like strawberries, right?" he jokes. "You can put it in the washing machine, I'll be doing the laundry in a second anyways..." there is a small moment of eye contact shared, then Suguru looks down, and frowns at something he sees, "(SATORU YOU LEFT YOUR SOCK ON THE FLOOR AGAIN!)"

"(Haha, sorry.)" you hear Satoru half-heartedly apologize from the other room.

So Suguru picks up the sock like an annoyed mother and goes to lecture Satoru.

"(You're embarrassing me in front of our guest. For the love of god, don't leave your goofy ass socks on the floor. What if she slips on them?)"

"(You're such a mother, Suguru.)"

You're calmly and casually going to put your juice-stained shirt in the washing machine like Suguru said, but then...

(the boys are talking and there's just this hilariously dramatic scream from the laundry room)

"DID THE CAT SCRATCH YOU?"

"(Did the cat scratch her?)"

"Ow, y-yeah!" you whine.

Suguru's the first one at the crime scene, and he picks up the cat and proceeds to lecture the cat as if it understands Japanese. It licks its lips and nubby nose and has an evil stare. You giggle.

"I'm so sorry... come, uh — (Suguru, we still have Hello Kitty adhesives somewhere, right?)" Satoru instinctually holds your hand that got scratched.

And he holds it so tenderly and caringly that it makes your whole chest quake for him.

彼女の手の傷はとても小さなものですが、それでも私は心臓がチクチクするのを感じました。 Although the wound on her hand was very small, I still felt my heart tingle.

He leads you to his bedroom, picking up some adhesives and antiseptic on the way, and sits with you on the unmade beds. You watch his fingers nimbly peeling the plastic off the adhesive, admiring how swiftly and perfectly he does even the littlest things. He has such a great attention to detail, it makes you self-conscious; is he thinking of you with the same attention to detail as everything else? Yes... he is.

He dabs some antiseptic on your small scratch, and then gently wraps and pats the Hello Kitty adhesive around it. You're pretty sure he's the one who bought them. Oh, if only you could ask him, but where even is your phone? Lost in a void somewhere, probably.

"Thank you, Satoru."

His eyes light up. His heart thumps. Why did those small, simple words have such a great effect on him?

"Mhm." he hums in acknowledgement. "You're welcome."

あなたの傷がもっと良くなるようにキスしたいです。 I want to kiss your wounds to make them better.

A second after thinking this and looking at your hand, he brings it to his lips and presses a very delicate kiss to the edge of your wrist, where the small cut spanned up to the base of your palm. Can you even call it a kiss? It's more like his lips graze your skin, hovering timidly.

And for some reason... the atmosphere becomes very intimate. Is it because of the place where he kissed you? The inner wrist has never occurred to you to be an intimate spot, and yet you're feeling as if he just kissed you on the lips.

You hear him audibly swallow, like he's conscious of this, too. The both of you become very aware of the tension in the atmosphere.

And then he looks apologetic, as if he overstepped a boundary. So you mutter a small, whispery "thanks..." which lifts his heart up into his throat and reassures him that you don't mind the intimacy.

"Mmm..." he blinks at you, pursing his lips.

His eyes linger on your lips for a moment, and it feels like he's about to... well you know his body just wants to... he sort of...

"Hey, how's the wounded patient?" Suguru interrupts, and you and Satoru spring apart like you're elastic bands that just got released after being stretched.

"Ahah, I'm okay. It's not a bad scratch." you lift your hand, "I'll cherish this Hello Kitty Bandaid forever, thank you."

"Yeah, Satoru bought 'em so you can thank him."

"I knewww he bought them, haha! So expected... cutiepie." you admire Satoru, and he's pretty sure that the last thing you said is some cute nickname, so he smirks.

"Okay, well... anyways, let's head out before the sun rises too high and it gets too hot to walk."

Do not plagiarize / repost / translate / copy layouts / etc.

Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.

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