throttlegainwell
90% hurt/comfort by volume
I like weird shit. throttlegainwell on Ao3; this is a sideblog, so I like and follow back under a different name. Please read the pinned post before following and don't follow if you're under 18. Bigots will be blocked.
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make me choose @eurekastriker asked jonathan or steve
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hopeless time loop. the way out isn’t to save everyone. the way out isn’t to save even one person. the way out isn’t to change anything. the way out is accepting how it happened the first time is how it always will be. that’s how you acted, that’s how they acted, that’s how you would have acted every time if you weren’t given the curse of hindsight. the way out is accepting you can’t fix the past; you can only forgive yourself for it.
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Charlie Heaton as Jonathan Byers in Stranger Things “Chapter Seven: The Bite” (3.07)
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Ask Game for the Aspiring Fic-Reccer
Recommend your favorite fic ever.
Recommend a favorite fic posted in the past year.
Recommend a favorite fic posted more than three years ago.
Recommend a fic for a rarepair!
Recommend a hidden gem for a popular pairing.
Recommend a fic that has fewer than 5 comments (author replies don't count) and deserves more!
Recommend a longfic!
Recommend a ficlet under 1000 words.
Recommend a fic from your first fandom.
Recommend a fic from your latest fandom!
Recommend something smutty!
Recommend something fluffy!
Recommend something angsty!
Recommend something hurt/comfort!
Recommend a genfic!
Recommend a shipfic where the platonic relationships shine as much as the romantic one(s)!
Recommend a fic with a poly relationship!
Recommend something with your favorite trope.
Recommend something with your favorite kink.
Recommend a fic where the characterization is just so good, perfectly to your taste.
Recommend a fic with good worldbuilding!
Recommend a fic with great prose.
Recommend a fic with amazing dialogue!
Recommend a fic rated G.
Recommend a fic rated T.
Recommend a fic rated M.
Recommend a fic rated E.
Recommend a canon compliant fic!
Recommend a canon divergent fic!
Recommend an AU fic!
#ooh this is neat#I'm terrible at remembering what I've read and i haven't read much the past few years#but I'd be game to give it a shot and i love reccing fics
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Thinking about this again.
I've been thinking about the purpose and value of content warnings--what they mean for me as a writer and as a reader, particularly one who often engages with dark, intense, or otherwise weird stuff. I'm a big believer in content warnings, for a number of reasons. I warn as thoroughly as I can; I always have and I always will. But--and maybe this is from coming up in fandom before content warnings were even common, much less standard--I don't think that they're a requirement and that someone is doing it wrong if they choose not to. I think they're a courtesy.
The thing about engaging with media--and particularly fic, I think--is that it involves a certain degree of trust. Not in, like, a particularly deep way, but you're trusting this creator with your time and, if their work is effective, with your emotions. I don't ever want someone's day ruined because they read something of mine that they weren't prepared for. I do my best to make sure that doesn't happen (and the rest is on them to be responsible for and honest with themselves).
But I'm not in a place these days where my triggers tend to get bumped by fics. So for me? Content warnings are a reassurance that the author probably understands what they're talking about and will likely handle it with care, or at least with respect. That they respect their readers and the subjects. If you're warning for something, then that communicates to me that its implications are not lost on you and that no matter what is depicted, you get it, or at least you care about getting it. Whether or not I like how you depict it or what you write is a totally separate issue. (This is similar to another purpose of content warnings: they can serve as advertisements for people looking for those kinds of stories. They don't mean "oops this bad content somehow got in my fic I'm so sorry"; they mean "this content is there".)
I've had readers comment before on the way I warn. They've said that they felt respected, that they appreciated how thorough I am, and that having that reassurance and forewarning made it possible for them to read my work only when they were in the right headspace to do so (and know that it was there to do so when they needed it and were ready). A couple have said that they were a little intimidated by the warnings, but ultimately glad that they read the story. Particularly for some of the stuff I write, you're asking for a lot of trust, and being very upfront about what to expect communicates that I take that trust seriously and that I try my best to handle sensitive subjects with care. That's what I'm trying to communicate, and that's the feedback I've gotten.
So. You know. Big fan of content warnings.
#i dunno something something shifting fandom culture and space-specific etiquette#i'm not at all bothered by a Choose Not To Warn experience so warnings for me function more as advertisements#and they signal that i'll probably enjoy the tone of the story#more than i would in a fic where the author doesn't seem to recognize the implications of something#i don't need for those implications to be explored in every case!#but i'm sort of picky about the vibe i like (not for ethical reasons but for stylistic ones)#so i appreciate that#i'm not gonna enjoy something scuzzy presented as something nice but i WILL enjoy the scuzziness if you just let it be scuzzy#because the scuzziness is the selling point there for me you know? let it be gross#but that's not a value judgement; it's just down to personal taste#long post#fandom
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My writing nemesis is very finicky timelines where I have to really make a decision about where to stick some event because either a) the plausibility of said event is impacted by the order in which other events occur or b) the implications of said event change drastically depending on the context.
Overblown story griping below cut (as well as discussion of underage sex work and consent issues). It's the Billy one, so, you know.
strange is your language is kind of fiddly, timeline-wise, because it's an AU kind of (in the sense that I don't think Jonathan would actually fuck Billy and that he's probably not engaging in sex work in canon, even though I think it's plausible that he would have), but mostly intended to slot reasonably into place. But it's so tricky to find that slot in the canon timeline because a lot of the tone is dependent on whether it occurs before or after S2: whether Billy has gotten his ass kicked yet (or even shown up), whether Bob is alive (and therefore Joyce is happy or grieving), whether Jonathan and Nancy have gotten together (which I don't necessarily want to fuck up, and also it gets tricky both in terms of fidelity and safety).
I can fudge the timeline a little by having Billy show up over the summer or something, so he hasn't just blown into town last week, and that seems reasonable enough to solve that problem (because he needs time to establish that he's an asshole and to plausibly pick up some knowledge about Hawkins and find good cruising spots). But whether or not he's gotten his ass kicked yet and Jonathan has seen what an abusive douchebag he is to Max hugely influences their interactions.
It makes way more sense to set it post-S2, but then Joyce is grieving, and, yeah, the financial pressures are probably stronger in a post-Bob world and so are the pressures to stay on top of shit and be self-sufficient (e.g., dealing with the car issue on his own and not letting on to Joyce that there's a problem). But I feel bad having this kid go out and have this (not traumatic but vaguely shitty) encounter while freshly-traumatized from S2 and with Joyce grieving Bob. But I can also see there being incentive to deal with it on his own when things are going well and Joyce is in a good place because he doesn't want to disrupt her happiness.
There's also the issue of Jonathan a) doing sex work (which, in this universe, is something he has done previously, more than once, but doesn't do regularly) and b) sleeping with Billy (which does involve Jonathan initially consenting to some degree of sexual contact, though consent to subsequent contact is, uh, fuzzier). Because if he's not with Nancy, then it's whatever. But if he's with Nancy, then it's... not great. For several obvious reasons that I don't feel the need to enumerate (again, the safety and fidelity of it all). The solution is probably to just have had them sleep together in S2 and then be in sort of a gray area where they're definitely going to get together soon, but they're not quite together yet, but I just don't see that being realistic because, uh, those two were chomping at the bit to get together. Plus, still seems a little iffy. So then it's getting into the issue of whether Jonathan would do any of that while in a relationship, and I mostly think he wouldn't, but, then, he has stuff going on (financial insecurity) that isn't going away just because he has a girlfriend. The fucking Billy part becomes complicated, too, but I don't want to say "oh it'd 100% be cheating" because, again, the consent issues are uncomfortable (like, yeah, he consents initially, but not for great reasons, so the implications sort of leave a bad taste).
Anyway, none of this is insurmountable. It just means that I need to make specific decisions and stick to them. And I like having the freedom to just go with the vibes and not really pin down those specifics, so it's annoying, if not necessarily an impediment. So this is really more an example of my complete lack of anything resembling writing-related self-discipline and my desire to be as vague and wishy-washy as possible in my process and, therefore, keep my options open. Which, regrettably, doesn't always work.
And, tbh, all of this is WAY overthinking what's ultimately a dead dove fic in which I'm not obligated to consider any of this shit. Because the whole point of the DD:DNE tag is that you get what you get and the greater implications can be whooshed away. And yet I am considering it, for some masochistic reason.
Literally all that needs to happen is Jonathan getting a sloppy blowjob, about which he's annoyed but not upset, and subsequently getting bent over the hood of Billy's car, about which his feelings are mixed. Why am I making this complicated.
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One thing I really like about writing Lucas is that he does have an ego. He’s proud and a little vain and he does NOT like being told what to do. I think there’s a tendency in fanfic and some published fiction for self-deprecation and self-abnegation to be presented as near-complete virtues. Sympathetic characters are always down on themselves and take all criticism to heart and have no pride and never resent mistreatment; if they’re validated or defended, it comes from an outside source. And, often, if a writer is trying to make a character they dislike more sympathetic, they’ll show them hating themselves for being so terrible.
I get the appeal, but I’ve lost my taste for the more pronounced version as I’ve gotten older. It’s no sin to take pride in your accomplishments or be angry when someone is unkind to you; it’s often a necessity to get through life. This is true for everyone, but, when a character is marginalized somehow, the pitfalls of putting humility on a pedestal are more obvious.
#saaame#i love getting to write confidence and ego and even a little vanity#self-deprecation is easy but not as fun and i always wince a little#it's nice to have that variety when you try on different voices#but also you're exactly right about the value placed on excessive humility to the point sometimes#of self-denigration#but confidence is good and so is sticking to your guns (in life and they're interesting to read about too)#and yeah i think i am especially conscious of this when a character is marginalized in some way#also re: your tags SAME#i like to give everyone something to dig in their heels about#even when they are depressed or kind of a pushover i always want to give them something to push back against
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There are two versions of it. Artifacts from when I used to have fics in separate files and I would move between computers and external hard drives and end up with duplicates all over the place.
I should have gotten Scrivener years ago. No wonder past!me never finished shit.
Ohhh, I found an old Deadpool story that I can't believe I never finished. The premise is very fucked up, but oddly heartwarming. I bet it wouldn't take too much time to wrap up...
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Ohhh, I found an old Deadpool story that I can't believe I never finished. The premise is very fucked up, but oddly heartwarming. I bet it wouldn't take too much time to wrap up...
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How much overlap would you say there is between your reading interests and your writing interests?
Asking because there are things I would read but not write, of course--because I'm not confident in my abilities, not comfortable writing about the topic, or just not intrigued enough to devote creative energy toward it--but there are also things that I would write but not necessarily seek out to read, just because I want to try it my way (sort of like how there are a lot of foods that I wasn't that into until I prepared them myself).
#writing tag#i don't think this is a poll situation#just something i've been curious about for a while
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Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Maxine “Max” Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair, Lucas Sinclair/Original Female Character(s), Patrick Mckinney/Original Character(s), The Party & Lucas Sinclair, Patrick McKinney & Lucas Sinclair, Erica Sinclair & Lucas Sinclair, Charles Sinclair & Lucas Sinclair, Lucas Sinclair & Sue Sinclair, Lucas Sinclair & Nancy Wheeler
Characters: Lucas Sinclair, Mike Wheeler, Dustin Henderson, Patrick McKinney, Maxine “Max” Mayfield, Sue Sinclair, Charles Sinclair, Erica Sinclair, Nancy Wheeler
Additional Tags: Mentions of canonical violence, Light Teen Sexuality, Racism, Classism, Horticulture, Sports, Dancing, Complicated High School Romances, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, The Angry (Metaphorical) Ghost of Billy Hargrove, Open Ending, Set in late 1985, Lucas Sinclair-centric, Nightmares, PTSD, Loving Your Parents but Not Telling Them Shit
Summary:
Everyone wants something from Lucas, but the Hawkins High Winter Formal forces him to think about what he wants.
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