#I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nexysworld · 1 year

Text

Music to My Ears

Read on AO3 🖤 Requests are Open 🖤 Fic/Request Master List

Summary: Heimdall finds you in Vanaheim, as the Scion of the Aseir it’s his job to punish traitors, but he has some other ideas besides fighting you.

🖤 Pairing: Heimdall/Fem!Reader 🖤 Tags: NSFW, Smut, BDSM Elements, Spitting, Spanking, slapping, Dom Heimdall, Porn with a little plot, self indulgent brain rot, not proof read

Inspired by this audio I made, here's a little oneshot with our Golden God. where he finds you on his trip to Vanaheim.

“Ah I should have expected to run into you here too. Sizzles wasn’t looking too hot the last time I saw him, don’t worry though Sunshine, because I’ll set you ablaze myself.” Heimdall laughed as you backed away from him. You felt like an animal that had been caged in, the only way out of your current predicament was to either disappear into the ground, or somehow get past Heimdall yourself. Neither option was a good one. You continued to back up until you were stopped by the vine covered rock wall. You gulped as you watched him hop off of Gulltoppr and begin towards you on foot. ‘Fuck where’s Kratos, Atreus…Freya?’ You desperately thought to yourself. “Oh Sunshine, they aren’t coming to your rescue, you know that right? Even if they tried, you can’t really think anyone would be able to stop me from getting to you, do you?”

You hated that he could see your thoughts right now. The fear. The panic. The despair. You almost couldn’t believe this is the same man who you gifted your trust, who you allowed to bed you in Asgard. All of that was thrown away now, whatever you were before…it meant nothing now that you were standing on opposite ends of the battlefield. This isn’t what you wanted though, and you knew that. He knew that. It changed nothing. The moment he sensed even the slightest betrayal on you, the two of you were done. “Why so quiet? Your last few moments of life and really you have nothing to stay? I am profoundly unimpressed. I truly expected more out of you.” He shrugged as he continued his stroll towards you. You looked up and down, side to side, trying to find anything that would save you. You were so focused on your escape attempt you hadn’t realized how close he had gotten until you felt his hand on your chin, turning you to look up at him. You were met with purple glowing eyes and a sneer. “Are you being shy now? You weren’t shy the other daywhen you were. . . mewling for me. This is really no fun Sunshine.” ‘Fuck you.’ You said in your head as you trembled under his touch. “Really now? You can think it but can’t say it? Hah.” He searched your face for a moment, scanning you up and down. “Now that you think it, perhaps I should bend you over right here and see what other noises I can get you to make for me.” Your face went absolutely red at the comment, you weren’t completely sure if it was from fear, shame, or arousal…you settled on all three. “Actually, I am sure that’s what I am going to do.” Heimdall leaned forward and licked your earlobe before whispering to you. “Be a good girl for me.” You felt the heat of arousal begin to pool in your lower half at his words, but your fight or flight kicked in and your automatic response was to spit at him. Not smart. He dodge it as expected but then you felt the world around you spin when his hand collided with your cheek. You didn’t have much time to recover as he grabbed you squishing both of your cheeks together until your mouth opened. “You wanna play that game Sunshine?” It was a rhetorical question as instead of letting you answer, you felt him spit directly into your mouth. His hand clamped over your mouth and nose forcing you to swallow, when he finally let go you managed a small wheeze. You wanted to gag. You wanted to be mad, but the arousal between your legs just increased. You hated even more that he knew it too. You felt pathetic…but so good at the same time. Heimdall stripped off his belt that held his waistcoat and sword up before tightly strapping the leather around your wrists and pulling tight. He swapped your positioning so you were facing the wall again, if you didn’t want to fall over you were forced to use the weight of your tied wrists to keep you upright. “Now…where were we? Ah yes…” He said as you felt a hand collide with one of your butt cheeks. You yelped. Another spank. Another yelp. “Music to my ears Sunshine.” You could almost hear the elatement in his voice, and by the time he was done your legs were trembling, and a pool had formed between them. Heimdall shoved your head down and angled you so your butt was more in the air before he lifted the bottom of your dress up and tossed it over your back. He immediately noticed the wet spot that had formed between your legs. “Oh Sunshine, all that for me? I’ve barely even touched you. Who would have thought you’d be such a whore for your enemy?” He teased before slapping your pussy softly, earning another small yelp.

“Look at that pretty color.” He said gently massaging one of your sore cheeks. “And you were so good for me too while you took it.” Fuck you loved when he praised you like that. “Since you were so good, I’ll forgive the little act of rebellion and give you a reward, how does that sound?” Your lips curled into a pout, you didn’t want to give in, but your mind betrayed you. “Say it out loud Sunshine. Tell me, do you want a reward for being such a good girl for me, or not?” “Y-yes….please….want a reward.” You managed to get out, your face felt like it was on fire as the words left your mouth. A reward you would receive though. You felt Heimdall rub your clit gently through the fabric of your underwear causing you to moan slightly. When he tugged your underwear down and made direct contact, you almost bucked as you whimpered. “Very good Sunshine, but those are all noises I’ve heard before…let’s try something else.” Heimdall bent down so he was face to face with your wet pussy. You’re lucky he had a firm hold on your hips as you almost fell over when his tongue made contact, licking a swipe from the bottom of your lips to the top and over your clit.

“Oh ho ho, now there’s a new one.” He leaned forward again to lap at your sopping lips, speeding up his actions whenever he’d hear a noise that he approved of. You were so close, wanting to rut against him, but unable to in your current position. Then he stopped. “Ah. Ah. Ah.” He said as he stood wiping his mouth. “You’ve been good, but not good enough to earn that yet.” You couldn’t help the audible whine that left your mouth, or the pout that formed on your lips. He stood you back up and turned you around to face him, back to the wall again. Despite the dirt and small cuts from your running around Vanaheim, he thought you looked perfect right now; hazy lust filled eyes, reddened cheeks, and that sweet little pout on your lips. If only you could have been his. If only he hadn’t had to see that brief glimmer of betrayal when you spoke with the little Jotunn. Heimdall would have gladly kept you all to himself in Asgard and locked eyes with your fucked out face every night. He wasn’t sure what made him more upset. The thoughts of betrayal, the denial of it you kept trying to get him to believe, or the fact that this would be the last time he’d get to have an opportunity like this with you. He cleared those thoughts from his mind as he decided to continue. If you were going to go out, it was going to at least be with a bang. Heimdall pressed his knee up between your legs. You groaned at the contact of his rough pants to your aching clit. “Tell ya what Sunshine, you can finish all you want, but you have to do all the work.” He motioned to his knee. He leaned forward and locked your lips together. You missed how they felt, so soft and pink, they had even been comforting at one point. You opted to take him up on his offer and bucked along his leg wildly, chasing your own pleasure. He ate up every little noise you made before moving to suck and nip at your neck. Your grinding against his leg was becoming frantic and needy, you were so close again, you were almost scared that he was going to go back on his word, but he didn’t. “That’s it, good girl, go ahead and cum for me.” His words were your undoing, you felt the tightly wound rubber band inside of you snap as you let out a noise between a moan and a sigh of relief. You rode your orgasm out on his leg, now also soaked with your juices. “Atta girl.” He said gently rubbing your cheek. He allowed you to catch your breath while he lifted his tunic over his head and tossed it over Gulltoppr’s saddle. You could see his own erection straining tightly against his dark pants. You licked your lips thinking about it. One thing was for sure, Heimdall was certainly…proportional. You remembered the first time you two had slept together. ‘Seriously? Of course you have a big dick too, why wouldn’t you. Bully’s compensate my ass’ you had thought to yourself, hoping he wasn’t listening. He had been. But your comment made him laugh, and you swear you saw his cock twitch at your thoughts too. You felt a small twinge of longing to go back to that moment, instead of being here. You were suddenly missing that time with him. You wished the current circumstances were different as well. Before you had completely come down from your high, Heimdall had freed himself from his pants and stroked it a few times. He brought it up to your lips and rubbed the tip against them. “C’mon Sunshine, you don’t want me to fuck you dry now do you?” You wanted to protest again. ‘Dry? But I’m soaking wet, just fuck me already!’ But before he could respond to your thought you wrapped your mouth around his tip. He was too big for you to take in fully, but you knew how to tease him. You sucked a bit before removing your mouth with a pop sound before running your tongue along his length and working your way back to the tip. You could hear him let out soft groans with each new tactic you tried and each bob of your head. You loved how he sounded. How you made him sound. When Heimdall deemed your work complete he pulled his cock away from your mouth. He lifted you up like you weighed nothing, and instinctively you wrapped your legs around him. With one long thrust he pulled you down all the way onto his cock until he bottomed out. He moaned loudly at the action. You let out a moan with a mix of pain and pleasure at being stretched out so abruptly. A few more thrusts and the pain had almost entirely dissipated. The only sounds around you between breathy moans were the sound of wet skin slapping. “Oh fuck.” You finally said out loud when he hit that spot. That spot that made you see stars. “Yeah Sunshine? Do I make you feel good?” He only needed one arm to hold you, and fuck if his strength didn’t add to your attraction to him, the fact that he decided to use his free hand to rub circles on your puffy clit definitely did. “Y-yes..fuck…feel so good…” You whined. “Good girl, can you cum for me one more time on my cock, Sunshine?” He asked not letting up his thrusting or the finger so thoroughly abusing your clit. You didn’t have to answer him with words as you threw your head back and let out the most primal noise he’d ever heard from you, he felt your juices squirt onto his lower abdomen and pants. He continued to thrust into you chasing his own pleasure, thrusts becoming erratic as he was close. A few more thrusts into your spent hole and he felt his own pleasure erupt, filling you with thick hot ropes of his cum, his thrusts slowed as he rode out his own orgasm. Heimdall pulled his softened cock from you, and let you flop backwards using his hand to soften your contact with the wall. You looked so exhausted, if you were even capable of feeling fear still he couldn’t tell. Your mind was a hazy cloud of pleasure and the only thought on your mind was Heimdall. If he did kill you now, you’d be lucky, most don’t get such a blissed out end to their life. Heimdall considered it for a moment. He ultimately landed on the idea that you’d make a better trophy of war than a dead participant, especially since you wouldn’t be a threat without your cohorts. He could hear by the sounds in the distance that the attempt to save Freyr was not going well, so he laid you down next to Gulltoppr, using the reins to tie your bound hands to the saddle.

“Stay right here for me, Sunshine.” He said pulling his tunic back over his head and picking up his sword, Hofud. You were too tired, and the giant beast felt too warm for you to care. You didn’t even realize you were falling asleep as you watched Heimdall walk off into the distance.

#heimdall x reader #heimdall #gow heimdall #god of war #fanfiction #reader insert #female reader

84 notes · View notes

eskawrites · 10 months

Text

i finally finished tears of the kingdom.....annnnnd immediately sat down and wrote a ronance thing. uh, spoilers for the end of totk

(also this is lowkey for @sweepy-stringbean who is entirely to blame for the ronance totk brainrot. thanks for the fantastic art that started this spiral. although again, spoilers for the end of the game, so i won’t be offended if you don’t read it lol)

They end how they begin.

Falling.

Nancy comes to with her hair whipping around her face, the wind biting into her bare skin, and her heart tugging her down, down, down.

She’s thrown from the demon king, tumbling through the sky even as the darkness starts to thin and the tang of blood fades from the air. She thinks maybe her luck has finally run out, but no—Robin is there. Robin is catching her. Robin is flying them both through the air until—

Nancy turns to look below her. She holds her arms out, spreads her legs, controls her fall in a way that feels second nature, now, somehow.

Below her, Robin continues to plummet, eyes closed. There’s something graceful about the way she falls. Robin, her Robin, not the creature she turned herself into to save them all.

Nancy sets her jaw and angles her body, diving after her.

“I don’t need you to follow me around, you know.” Robin looks down her nose at Nancy, but the set of her arms across her chest is nervous. Self-conscious. “I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

Nancy says nothing. It’s not like she has a choice in the matter, either. Robin turns on her heel and keeps walking down the path. Nancy follows, ignoring Robin’s annoyed huff as she goes.

The sun glows in the clouds. Morning. It had been night when Nancy delved beneath the castle. She thinks she should be exhausted, but the only ache she feels in her bones is the frightened, desperate urge pulling her down.

“Your skill outshines every other member of the Royal Guard,” Robin says, eyes on Nancy as she goes through her formations despite the rain falling around them. “And your dedication to your training surpasses even that.”

It’s hard to tell with how softly she speaks, with how rough her voice always is, but Nancy hears something. A catch. A secret. A puzzle to solve.

“But what if,” Robin continues, “you weren’t meant to be a fighter? What if, one day, you realized this path wasn’t meant for you? And yet everyone around you told you it was the only path. Would you still take it?”

She slows her movements, then stops entirely, turning to look at Robin. Her eyes are downcast, not looking at Nancy for an answer.

“You can do anything, Nancy,” Robin whispers. “And I—I can’t complete even this one task ahead of me.”

The clouds thin enough for her to see Hyrule stretched out below them. The mountains in the distance, the darkness of the Lost Woods, and the endless green fields directly underneath.

Nancy can’t breathe. Her head pounds with every slap of her and Robin’s feet in the puddles of the woods they run through. The parts of her skin that aren’t burnt, or torn, or beaten bloody are coated in mud and ash. In the distance, she can hear the heavy footfalls of Guardians still searching for them. She knows Robin can, too.

But she pulls her along anyway, trying to pull strength from the slight warmth of Robin’s hand in her own.

Until it isn’t.

Nancy spins as Robin falls, hitting the mud in a heap. She runs back to her, but Robin doesn’t even lift her head. She digs her fingers into the ground.

“We lost,” she whispers, the words barely audible through the rain. “We lost…everything.”

Nancy kneels in front of her. When Robin looks up, there are tears in her eyes, cutting tracks through the blood and ash on her cheeks.

“I really am a failure,” she breathes. Nancy shakes her head, reaching for her, but Robin’s breath hitches and she continues in a sob, “I left them all to die. I tried, and I failed them all.”

Nancy grabs her and pulls her in, curling around her. Robin falls into her, sobbing.

Robin’s eyes are still closed. Nancy is close enough to see the light in her hair, the freckles dusted oh so delicately across her nose and cheeks.

“I always knew.” Robin’s cheeks are dusted pink, warming the skin behind her freckles. She keeps her gaze on the ground between them, her lashes long and pretty. She’s pretty. Pretty, and powerful, and brilliant—and so pristine before her, like she hasn’t spent one hundred years waiting for Nancy to return. “I always knew you’d come back to us. I meant what I said, you know. You can do anything, Nancy.”

She finally looks up, and Nancy steps forward instinctively, wanting to reach for her, not knowing if she’s even allowed.

“But I do wonder…” Robin smiles—a wry, smirking thing. “Do you really remember me?”

As if Nancy could ever forget.

The last of the clouds give way. Nancy can see buildings now, paths, the rubble of fallen islands. Not far off, she can see the ring of Lookout Landing, the tower, Purah’s telescope. A trio of horses runs through the field beside it. She can just make out the trees swaying in the wind.

Hyrule Castle still hovers in the sky.

“I want to go beneath the castle,” is Robin’s greeting. Nancy lowers her fork and watches her. She smiles sheepishly. “Sorry. Morning, Nance.”

Nancy nods, biting back her own smile. She kicks out the seat beside her, knowing Robin would object to her standing and pulling it out for her to sit. Robin flops into the chair, anything but the perfect picture of a princess. She reaches over and squeezes Nancy’s hand in thanks, then grabs one of the apples in the basket on the table.

“Someone needs to investigate this…gloom, they’re calling it. And that seems to be its source. So. Are you up for another adventure with me?”

Water glitters below them. Robin is so close now—close enough for Nancy to see the engravings in the stone around her neck, the shine of her rings, the calm, almost peaceful set of her brow.

“I am not afraid,” Robin says, turning to face Nancy. She smiles, her face relaxed in the glow of the torchlight. Calm. “I’m with you.”

Nancy reaches out, straining for her.

“You, who carries that fragile sword. Nancy.”

Nancy glares at the being before them. She bends her knees, spreads her arms just slightly. Covers as much of Robin as she can.

She spreads her fingers and comes up short, not quite brushing against Robin’s limp hand. She has to reach her. She has to reach her.

The ground falls out beneath them. Robin screams her name. Nancy ignores the sickening pain of her arm and dives after her, reaching, reaching—

—reaching, just a little farther—

Her hand grasps Robin’s. She tightens her grip and pulls Robin up to her, wrapping herself around her as they fall, fall, fall.

The water stings as they hit it, but Robin stays limp in her arms. Nancy adjusts her grip to wrap an arm around her waist, then starts pushing her way through the water. She can see the shadows of the giant lily pads, and the refraction of the light, and a singular bass swimming frantically away from them.

Her feet hit earth, sinking into the mud. She drags herself and Robin forward, up, out.

Nancy surfaces and breathes for what feels like the first time since she woke up. She flings her wet hair out of her face and looks back at Robin. She’s breathing. She isn’t moving, but she’s breathing.

Nancy pulls her closer, adjusting once again to cradle her in her arms. She walks slowly out of the water, taking care not to slip, something deep inside her finally, finally settling as she feels Robin’s chest rise and fall against her own body.

She kneels and lays Robin gently in the swaying grass. She keeps one hand beneath her head, cradling her. Her other hand comes up to brush the wet strands of hair from her forehead.

Robin. Robin.

“Robin,” Nancy whispers. “You’re safe now. You’re finally home. Come back to me.”

Robin’s brow furrows. There’s a soft intake of breath, and then her eyes flutter open. Nancy exhales and reaches down to grab her hand.

“Nance?” Robin’s fingers twitch beneath hers. “How are you…But I was…”

Nancy waits, as she always does. She waits, and she watches, and she thanks every goddess that has ever touched this land that she hasn’t lost her.

Robin sits up. Her hand drifts up to the stone around her neck. Her eyes move past Nancy to the sword strapped to her back. Her eyes widen.

“It reached you after all.”

Nancy nods, because of course it did. Robin knew it would work—and it had.

Slowly, Robin starts to smile.

“He—he’s gone. I—this is real, right? I’m not in a dream, right? You did it. Nancy, you did it!” She throws her arms around Nancy, and Nancy closes her eyes at the sound of her laugh.

But then Robin pulls away.

“Wait, though. How—how am I…?” Robin looks down at herself, like she’s expecting to see something else. Like maybe she isn’t quite here.

Nancy tightens her grip on her. She’s here. She’s here, and Nancy won’t lose her again.

“No,” Robin says softly. “No, I understand. I remember. I felt—it was like—an embrace. A warm, loving embrace. It was like—”

Robin looks up, meeting her eyes, and for once she’s speechless, too. But Nancy understands anyway. She nods and pulls Robin gently closer.

Robin hugs her back. She tucks her face into Nancy’s neck, and Nancy can feel tears. She rubs her hand up and down Robin’s back.

“So much happened. I have so much to tell you,” Robin says, voice tight with tears, breathless with excitement. Nancy nods again. She’ll listen. She’ll always listen.

She turns her head and presses her lips to Robin’s temple. Robin hugs her tighter.

“Welcome home,” Nancy whispers.

#ronance #totk #ronance totk au #writing things

29 notes · View notes

jesuisgourde · 2 years

Text

The story of Alan Wass saving Peter from a punch-up in a 24 hr shop, told in A Likely Lad vs a typewritten version posted to twitter in 2016 or thereabouts.

A Likely Lad transcript:

I was in a newsagent in Camden Town one night, two in the morning, and I was a bit drunk and got into some argument with these five Somali lads, and they started attacking me, and Alan came out of nowhere - he had a big hat on, long coat, swept them all up in his arms and put them through the window of this all-night shop.

Typewritten 2016 transcript [First part from a screenshotted video, the rest from twitter posts]:

Alan Wass contributions to Albion personel personal safety No. 3 'The 'onegreat push for Arcady' incident of 2005 (?) It was about 4 a.m. And myself and Alan were the survivors of a 3 days expedition into urban intoxication. Our research had taken us as far as the Camden Town end of Kentish Town road and in a newsagents/ refreshments bordago we exchanged strange burring noises as I showed him a recent copy of the now defunct music magazine the NME... I was the subject of an interview and review in that weeks edition and as such I held the well-known periodical for dramaticeffect. A group of 4 or 5 Somalian hoodlums entered the shop at that moment, and the sensor device above the door announced each of the chaps' arrival ith a little analogue 'ding' ok people ...before I continue with this rip-roaring yarn, I want you to try and guess (a la 'question of Sport') What Happens next

Alan was taken with them menacing posturing of the Somalian boys.. he knew one of them and began passing round a bottle of screwtop wine he hadnt paid for yet The shopkeeper just stared , his trigger finger near the alarm [Illegible] One of the boys looked at me, his head tilted to one side. O I'm adorning this visit to the mise en whatsit, ..the truth is..all I remember is one of the lads insisting that he knew me ..but couldn't place me ..then he saw the NME cover, and blinked with what could have passed for innocence in that awful harsh light I have already gone on about, trying desperately to capture here the seedy illumination in that place, in all these places. A row of bulging, explicit figures jostled for pornographic attention on the shabby top shelf. I was distracted for a second by 'classic cock monthly', which was cleverly designed to resemble the vintage automob-ile magazine . I wondered if there were copyright issues, and was slapped out of this odd thought by a sharp blow to the side of the head. My hat flew off, and the NME front cover came apart a I crashed against the racks of papers. all Albions monthlies and weeklies and tv guides and spankmags..the hat that I was wearing on the NME cover was now perfectly fitted on a photograph of a top-heavy lass with a saddle under one arm . chaos. I threw a punch at the face At that point I dodged a kic k, but was jumped from behind of my attacker and fell under a battering of kickc and clobbering.. Here's where it happen'd

and I see it clearly in my sometimes muddled memory Alan – in striped trousers tucked into huge riding boots – ran into the cluster of boys – scooped them all up in his arms and ran them through the glass doors of the shop front. He somehow was collosal, suddenly appeared 20 foot tall. They lay shocked in the broken glass, and mostly scattered, one of them stood up and screamed abuse at us but Alan's face – scaring even me – cast a spell on him. He visibly crumbled and ran off as sirens w ailed in all directions. It was like seeing a mother hen collecting her chicks he had this superhuman strength in him.. and I know that exageration colours these type of anecdotes, but I also know what happened... And that's what happened.. scooped them up and dashed them out and down and fucked them off. Be-jaysus

#peter doherty #pete doherty #a likely lad #i know which version i'd rather read #alan wass

46 notes · View notes

drawing-way-outside-the-lines · 5 months

Text

➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖

Chapter 39 - Babysitting.

------Daniel's point of view------

Daniel: It was about 30 minutes after the guys had left, that I noticed Evan sleeping in a garden chair. I walked over to him and pushed his foot lightly with mine Hey man! You're sleeping! I chuckled softly, but as there were no response I tabbed his foot a little harder. Still no response. Evan?… Evan? I padded his hand softly Oi man! I padded a bit harder Evan! I flipped his forehead pretty hard, just to teach him not to sleep on the job!

Evan: He mumbled something

Daniel: Hey! You're sleeping jackass. Let's get you to bed!

Evan: Fuck you man! He rubbed his forehead lightly and grunted Where's my beer?

Daniel: First of all, you haven't had beer the whole day… plenty of other shit to judge by your drunk ass, but I never saw a beer in your hands. Secondly, you're so drunk you passed out in a garden chair… so you're going to bed, whether you like it or not. And third, you missed out on Andy and Congo taking off.

Evan: He frowned and looked around the garden They left already?

Daniel: Already? It's way past midnight!

Evan: He grunted something and tried to stand up, but failed and fell face forwards down on the grass with a loud bump

Daniel: That's it! I'm dragging your ass to bed before you hurt yourself! I grabbed him under both arms and dragged him up. Quickly wrapping one of his arms around my shoulders and literally started dragging him to bed, as he refused to walk. I let him dump down on the bed, and headed for the bathroom, I knew Congo had some glass standing in the cabinet, and it was about time Evan got some fluids in his body… something without a % added to the name. I quickly found a big glass, filled it with water and joined Evan who had now kicked his boots and his pants off, cursing as he was now trying desperately to unbutton his shirt

Evan: Stupid fucking sssshit!!! I fucking hate this piece of

Daniel: I grabbed his left hand and placed the glass in it Drink! And let me take care of this! I grabbed the top button of his shirt and quickly opened it, then the next one, and the next one and the next one, and the

Evan: HEY! He slapped my hand away as I reached the button just above his belly button

Daniel: Relax! You're too drunk for me to find any interest in you right now!

Evan: He glared at me

Daniel: Drink your fucking water or I'll go call for your dad!

Evan: He glared even more but after few seconds decided he didn't dare to try me, so he drank it all in one go and put the glass on the bedside table

Daniel: I quickly unbuttoned the rest of the buttons and took his shirt off, pushing him gently so he fell down into the bed with a dissatisfied grunt Right… you stay here now! I don't wanna see you out there again more tonight, is that clear? You need sleep! Now!

Evan: He kept glaring at me, but then suddenly something changed in his eyes. A sadness appeared and his face changed, making him look almost like a lost puppy Did they really leave?

Daniel: Yeah… about 45 minutes ago?

Evan: He nodded softly and sighed

Daniel: They will be back again Sunday night, you're aware of that, right?

Evan: I guess so he pulled his shoulders

Daniel: Evan, this is their home, and you're here. Of course they will be back.

Evan: Yeah. I know. It's just the depression talking. Go outside and have fun with the others… I'll be okay.

Daniel: Somehow he didn't quite convince me, so I looked around for an ashtray. Right. As I found an ashtray I grabbed down in my pocket and dragged out the little tin I always stashed my joints in, grabbed one and lit it on fire. Alright, I'm bringing in the big guns now, which means this is my good night joint… which means you move over to whatever side you wanna live in, cause I'm gonna sleep here tonight.

Evan: He looked at me questioning

Daniel: Sleep Evan! I didn't say fondle you all night. Relax. I'm perfectly capable of controlling myself… unlike someone else I pointed my tongue at him and blew a big cloud of smoke out in his face Today Evan…

Evan: He grunted and moved much against his will and quickly pulled the blanket over himself

Daniel: I sat down on the bed and took my boots off, handing him the joint Careful with that one… you're only allowed a few drags. This one might just send you sleeping for days! I chuckled softly and took of my shirt and pants, then grabbed the joint again, making sure he wouldn't get too much. And as I laid down I smoked on it a few minutes before I spoke again in a soft voice Are you okay?

Evan: Shook his head Not really.

Daniel: Yeah, I figured. So what happened with you and Clover?

Evan: Can we not? I feel fucking bad about it!

Daniel: But… nothing happened right? I mean, how far did it go?

Evan: I dunno, it's all very blurry. She kissed me I think… and he grunted she sorta had her hand down my pants….

Daniel: I chuckled lightly Yeah, that does sound like something a drunk Clover would do.

Evan: He kept quiet

Daniel: But you didn't do anything, did you?

Evan: No. But I might have.

Daniel: What do you mean? I turned my head and looked at him questioning

Evan: I don't know. I seem to do a lot of stupid shit these days.

Daniel: Like what?

Evan: Can we just let it go? He sighed deeply and suddenly got tears in his eyes

Daniel: I quickly killed the last bit of joint in the ashtray and turned to my side so I could better look at him Look, I know this offer might not be welcome. So I'll just throw it out there, but let you know there's no hidden intentions. Back at the ranch when Andy had really bad nights, before you came up there and stole him from me I chuckled softly I used to cuddle up with Andy when Congo wasn't around. And he was more than capable of finding comfort in that. I know your answer will be no. But I just wanna let you know I'm more than capable of keeping it in my pants. And I'm here, in case you need anything. I'll just push play on the movie I can see is paused and then turn off the light so you can get some sleep. But, I'm right here if you need anything. You aren't alone. I smiled softly even though he didn't look at me, and turned around, finding the remote and pushing play. I turned off the light and laid down, picking up another blanket that had fallen on the ground and wrapped it around me. I watched about 5 minutes of the movie, before Evan turned to lay on his side with his back against me, and suddenly spoke in an almost whisper

Evan: Could you please hold me?

Daniel: I waited a bit to try to figure if he was speaking in his sleep or not

Evan: Daniel?

Daniel: I turned quickly and moved a bit closer, slowly wrapping my arms around him, feeling and hearing him sigh deep and relieved like Andy used to do. And that's how we fell asleep. I woke up next morning, early and found him shaking in the bathroom, curled up in a corner. I squatted down in front of him and placed my hands on his knees. Hey… what's wrong?

Evan: He looked at me with scared red eyes I think I'm…. no I am certain I will lose him. I feel him slowly slip away…. like he's so out of reach I will never be able to touch him again! He held his hands in front of his face and observed them like he had never seen them before, like they weren't a part of his body. And then I noticed they were filled with blood

Daniel: I grabbed his wrists hard and looked at his knuckles, quickly letting my eyes run over the room, and then I saw one of the bathroom cabinets were busted up Did you fucking break that with your bare hands?!

Evan: He looked up at me confused

Daniel: I nodded at the cabinet

Evan: He looked at it confused I guess?

Daniel: I sighed softly You're beginning to freak me out a bit. Maybe spending so much time with Andy makes you get too affected. This seems more like something Andy would do, and then black out? I sighed softly and got up, searched the cabinet on the wall for a soft wash cloth, and turned on the water tab, waiting for the water to get warm before I made the cloth wet I can't understand why you went to this bathroom anyway? You always use the second one right? I squad down and gently grabbed his right hand, dabbing the wet cloth over his knuckles. Once the blood was off it didn't look so bad after all. When I was done, I cleaned the other one as well. Should I call someone?

Evan: He sighed softly and shook his head I just need sleep.

Daniel: I nodded softly and grabbed his arm, yanking him up, and walked him to the bed. He didn't look at me, he didn't talk. I had no idea if I should call anyone. What the right thing would be to do. If I called Andy or Congo, they would come home and miss out on the mini honey moon. If I called George… who knows? So I just sat there, observing him for a while, before he spoke again.

Evan: You're starring.

Daniel: I chuckled softly Sorry.

Evan: Lay down and shut up.

Daniel: I pointed my tongue at him, but did as he said

Evan: He didn't speak for about 10 minutes, but then he turned and looked at me with the same red eyes as before I can't sleep. Make me sleep… please.

Daniel: I chuckled softly Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it! I bit my lips cheekily but grabbed for my pants and dragged out my joint tin, lighting a joint, which I quickly handed to him.

Evan: He grunted softly and turned to his back, letting his eyes drift to a spot on the ceiling as he started smoking Talk to me… it's too fucking quiet without him here. It drives me insane!

Daniel: I chuckled softly, even if I knew it wasn't a joke, but this new mood he was in made me feel awkward. I didn't know what to do? Andy had always been a mess, he had just crashed, but was pretty much the same guy though. Evan on the other hand, now seemed very different? I wasn't used to him showing strong feelings like this. So I was way out of my league. Where was Sparkle when I needed her? She would be good with things like this! I sighed deep They will be back you know… tomorrow night, it's not much more than 24 hours. I'm sure we can work it out somehow. Maybe we could go somewhere? How about seeing some old friends, or get together with the band? We could jam a bit or record something?

Evan: He sighed deep and shook his head softly Not exactly in the mood for people.

Daniel: So how about just staying in with some movies for the weekend? I don't exactly have any plans anyway, I can take my phone off sound, and we can just barricade the doors and order junkfood?

Evan: He grunted softly Just talk…

Daniel: I'm trying my best…

Evan: Just talk, I just need some sound in the room… I really don't care what you have to say, just say something.

Daniel: I smiled softly Alright… so… your dad seems to like Gizmo a lot, I think he's sorta ready to adopt him, so you might get a little brother soon? I chuckled softly Uhm… he's doing fine over at the house, but I think he sorta has OCD. He cleans all the time man!! All the fucking time!

Evan: He forced a small smile Yeah, he does that.

Daniel: I chuckled warmly Well not that the house couldn't use it, I'm not exactly the most tidy person, and Sparkle is too tiny to keep up with all that mess. That's also why we spend so much time at her place, it's cleaner, and there's food. And I like her cats. They're fun to play with. Oh and the other day, this girl came by, one of Sparkles friends, I think I might ask them for a threesome. She's so fucking hot Evan! You have no clue! Nice petite girl like Sparkle, very innocent looking, almost Lolita like I bit my lips Mmm mmm, I would really like a piece or ten of that, I'm just not sure Sparkle would be up for a threesome, she's not exactly into girls. Maybe I should try Ruby? I think she could be game! I just kinda can't stand her face any longer, it reminds me of her brother. Parker I kinda hissed the name out I still can't believe he almost… that slimy jackass, if I ever catch him again I will fucking teach him a lesson! She told him no, I heard it! I was standing right there observing them! And still he tried to get her panties off. I in no way regret I broke his fucking wrist, I should have broken more!

Evan: He looked at me with clearly stoned eyes He did what?

Daniel: I shook my head and grabbed the joint You shouldn't smoke more of this… you can barely keep your eyes open

Evan: He grunted softly What did Parker do?

Daniel: I groaned and took a deep drag of the joint He tried to fuck her alright, that's not really a problem except he's a fucking dick, and very bad company, so I would like her to keep her ass away from people like that, she's too easy to drag into shit, and she has had enough of that already with the fucking A-hole! But, problem was she didn't want to, and I walked in on them luckily, I heard her say no, quite a few times. And there were no doubt she meant it, it was loud, strong and convincing. She even told him he hurt her, and he still kept going, there was no way he could have misunderstood anything. She was very clear. Well, he didn't get anywhere as I was there obviously. And I broke his wrist and may have dislocated his shoulder as well, unless he did that by stumbling out of the door? Hm? I tilted my head and imagined the whole thing in my head again I'm hungry. I sat up straight and looked at Evan you want something from upstairs?

Evan: He shook his head lightly Just a bottle of water.

Daniel: I sighed softly You need to eat something or you will never get through this weekend. Trust me, things were always easier for Andy when he ate a bit.

Evan: He shook his head lightly No thanks. Later.

Daniel: I sighed softly and went upstairs, quickly checking my phone to see if I had any messages or unanswered calls. One message from Sparkle; 'Remember tomorrow we have the exhibition at my work, you're my date, pick me up at 8, or I will find someone else to booty call :P ' I chuckled warmly and grinned wide 'booty call' yeah, I could sure use some booty about now. Now where was I? I looked around me a bit* EVAAAAAAAN!!!

Evan: He stayed quiet

Daniel: EVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!

Evan: FOOD!! You went for food.

Daniel: Oh yeah. THANKS MAN!! I quickly headed for the fridge, grabbing some left overs from the wedding, and then spotted a small bowl of fruit salad. Everyone used to chop fruits like mad when Andy used to feel bad. Fruit salad and soups were pretty much the only thing he lived of back then. I looked at the bowl a few seconds then grabbed it alongside two bottles of water. Now how the fuck was I gonna carry all this? I looked down myself and stuck one of the bottles of water down the elastic of my boxers. ABORT!!!! ABORT!!!!!! FUCK!!!!! TOO COLD TOO COLD!!!!! I ran downstairs and quickly placed my plate of food and water bottle on the table, and ripped the bottle out of my pants, throwing it to Evan. Fuck that was cold man!!!

Evan: He looked at me with unimpressed eyes You know, you could have brought it on a tray. There's like 3-4 trays next to the fridge… at least.

Daniel: I glared at him

Evan: Just saying. He grabbed the water and shook it a bit So I get the dick water?

Daniel: Yes… that's the punishment for being a wise ass.

Evan: He grunted and sat up slowly, and quickly drank about half the bottle

Daniel: As he was done and put away the bottle, I slowly reached the bowl with fruits towards him

Evan: He frowned and shook his head slowly

Daniel: Evan, I insist. Look I get it, you feel like shit and they probably shouldn't have left you behind, but I'm pretty sure it was your choice. I'm pretty sure you put their needs in front of yours, cause we both know, if you had just asked them to stay, or at least asked to take you with them they would have. But it's fine, that's how you are, you're a sweet selfless guy, just like Congo. So fine, so be it. But if I have to stay here and keep you company, you gotta fucking eat. At least humor me and eat this fruit. Andy was 1000 times worse than you, and he managed to force it down, so really there's no excuse here. Eat!

Evan: He frowned, then grabbed the bowl and started eating with his fingers

Daniel: I observed him a bit So… if you're not gonna use that fork, can I have it? Cause I forgot one for myself.

Evan: He sighed softly and handed me the fork

Daniel: I smiled bright and eagerly started to eat my food. It was just as delicious as the night before.

Evan: He gave up through half of the small bowl and laid down. Sighing deeply

Daniel: We were both quiet as I finished my food, I suddenly felt the quietness as well. It was almost too loud, if that makes sense? So as I was done eating and put the plate on the table, I sipped my water and quickly made it to the stereo in the pool section of the tv room. I moved around Andy's playlists a bit, trying to find something relaxing. And as I found a fitting playlist, I chose a song and pushed play. It was about time to kill this deafening silence!: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGRiwLgf6no&list=PL749BAAA754189622&index=66 I made it back to bed and laid down next to him, lighting a second joint. If we couldn't figure some other way to kill time, we could at least get stoned as fuck! Along the song, I started softly singing. It was one of Andy's all time favorite songs, and I guess the lyrics were rather beautiful. If one were to really listen. It just had that certain gloomy Andy vibe, but also a big warm heart, magic and beauty.

Evan: His voice was deep and hoarse You know, if you trained a bit…. you actually wouldn't be a terrible singer.

Daniel: I chuckled hoarse I take that as a compliment.

Evan: Well, I don't care how you take it. It was meant as a compliment.

Daniel: I took another big drag and handed the joint to him.

Evan: He took a big drag and stretched one arm behind his head, and for few seconds turned his head to look at me, before he returned to stare at the ceiling I feel like something bad is gonna happen.

Daniel: Like what?

Evan: No response

Daniel: Can you be more specific?

Evan: Still no response

Daniel: I pulled my shoulders. I guess he couldn't. We stayed like this the next 30 minutes, listening to one song after another, slowly smoking the joint, and even after it was long gone, no one said anything. The room was dark although it was daylight outside. The curtains did a good job at keeping the light out, and if I didn't know better I would say it was way past midnight. Only the small bedside lamp gave an orange deep warm light on the bed. The rest of the room was almost dark as the night. Only a small light reaching us from the stairs, letting us know it was still day outside. Right. This weekend is gonna be fucking long unless someone tries to light the mood a bit! I laid there for 5 minutes, trying to come up with something to do or talk about, and then my fucking Daniel brain kicked in Hey… so… what's going on with you and Congo? I saw you dancing at the wedding…

Evan: He sighed deeply That was just a dance.

Daniel: Yeah, I would have assumed too, but then there were your dirty tshirt in Andy's car… that was clearly cum stains

Evan: An old one. His voice sounded unimpressed and like he couldn't care less, maybe I was wrong? Maybe it was just hopeful thinking of my dirty brain?

Daniel: Was I gonna give up though? Nahhh! So, you didn't fuck yet?

Evan: Scoffed No. Daniel.

Daniel: But you blew him?

Evan: No.

Daniel: He blew you?

Evan: He clearly turned tense. OMFG!!! I could have burst out laughing right there, but decided to keep it cool

Daniel: Right… so he gave you a blowjob, and now you don't know what to do with yourself. You're still straight as a ruler, but it also felt good, right? Well, I know how good he is, so I KNOW it felt good, I don't even have to question that. So you're a straight guy who happens to like getting blowjobs from guys. Big fucking deal! You need to talk about it though, or it will eat your brain.

Evan: He grunted There's nothing to talk about.

Daniel: So you didn't go ballistic on the shower cabin because you and him happened to have a thing out there? Come on Evan, you're THAT transparent! I have known you since we were teens. You HATE violence. Even against dead things. And why would you try to kill a shower cabin because of Andy? That shit just doesn't add up. I might not always know what goes on around me, but I'm not completely lost. And I can still put two and two together. So what happened? He blew you in the shower and now you feel guilty towards Andy, even if I am 100% sure Andy would let you do whatever you wanted to do with Congo, even without asking.

Evan: He just kept fucking quiet again. Okay okay… I see what you're doing there. I'll drag it out of you one way or another!

Daniel: I grabbed the bowl of fruit and casually ate a few pieces, pretending I had let the conversation go. I was gonna ninja my way through this one… sneak attack him. You know, you should try to eat a bit more… there's some honey down here in the bottom. Some sugar would do you good.

Evan: He didn't answer

Daniel: Are you there?

Evan: Yeah…. he suddenly sounded way stoned and suddenly I felt the joint kick in in my end as well. Guess the master ninja just got his own ass sneak attacked!

Daniel: Here… open up I gently pushed a honey covered strawberry against his lips, and to my surprise he actually ate it! This was not sexy at all… no, don't think about it. And watching a bit of honey run down his chin…. nah… piece of cake…. piece of fucking cake! I grabbed a slice of melon and wondered if I could do it again, or if it was a fluke. Nope… that one fucking went in as well as soon as I pressed it against his lips. I tilted my head and observed him with an eager grin. Ahh so you're a feeder, you like to be fed huh? Well guess what, Evan, I like to feed people, specially when they are so down right eatable as you are! I wondered what else I could squeeze through those lips? But decided to pick a piece of pineapple instead. Yep that one went in as well, leaving a thick coat of honey on his lips, and more dripping down his chin. Damn it was so tempting to just lean over and… specially if him and Congo had really done something together. Who's not to say he wouldn't let me do it then…?

Evan: You're starring.

Daniel: Damn! Sorry… it's just… you have…. I tabbed a finger against my chin

Evan: He grunted softly and dried a finger over his chin

Daniel: Yeah… you just made it worse.

Evan: He rolled his eyes and dried once again

Daniel: I chuckled softly Yeah, it's just all over your chin now.

Evan: Yes, thank you Einstein, I felt that!

Daniel: I chuckled warmly

Evan: Well, do something instead of just laughing.

Daniel: I grinned wide

Evan: No Daniel! Get me some paper.

Daniel: That just wont do… it will just stick to your skin.

Evan: Well, find something wet then for fuck sake! he was clearly starting to get annoyed and in immediate need of help.

Daniel: So I quickly bend forwards and planted a long lick from the tip of his chin and over his lips, laughing loudly as he punched me. It was worth it!

Evan: The fuck man! He chuckled softly and wrinkled his nose was that necessary?!

Daniel: Yup.

Evan: And my lips too? He quickly dried them with the back of his hand

Daniel: Definitely. They were filled with honey too.

Evan: He sighed softly and shook his head, then laid back down.

Daniel: Well that didn't work out. We stayed quiet for about 10 minutes, just once again listening to the music. Boy this was boring! I turned to my side and observed him. His eyes was closed now, so at least he didn't notice I was starring. He was laying there, dressed but.. man I wanted him to be undressed. I knew there were a limit, so I had no intention stepping over that… but sometimes limits can be pushed just a tiny bit, or at least tried…. limits can be tried… right? Am I right? I licked my lips and sighed as I turned to my back again. So let me guess….

Evan: He grunted slightly annoyed

Daniel: Well at least he didn't fall asleep You were feeling bad…. and you needed some comfort…. so a hug turned into a handjob… and a handjob turned into a blowjob… And it felt good, so you let your guards down and let yourself swim away in it. So far away that you even in some ways started feeling something for him, or at least a feeling of being fully comforted? So now you're a mess and all over the place. Not knowing what to do with this relationship any longer, and what your position in it is after this.

Evan: He grunted

Daniel: Do you want to be involved with Congo?

Evan: No. The irritation in his voice was growing

Daniel: Does he want to be involved with you? I'm pretty sure he's the one relationship kind of guy. So… what's there to be confused about? If you didn't feel anything, and he didn't either, stop the fucking worrying and just enjoy it for what it was. Comfort. A chance for feeling good for a change.

Evan: He sighed deeply

Daniel: But it's still confusing. Right. So tell me, is this confusing too? Without any warning I planted my hand on the bulge in his pants and gave it a firm squeeze, without removing my hand I bet this is pretty simple. Maybe even uncomfortable for you. So, you're clearly not into dudes. However, you're into getting fucking relieved the pressure and pain once in a while… and sometimes it just takes a little extra when the darkness gets extra heavy. So suck it up pumpkin, and don't ask for it again if you can't handle the aftermath. I'm pretty sure Congo isn't obsessing over it, and if he is, it's probably because he worries about your sorry ass. He did you a solid, hoping it would help you. Where's the point in that if you aren't gonna benefit from it? I sighed softly and grunted, staying silent for a few minutes

Evan: Daniel…

Daniel: Evan?

Evan: Your hand.

Daniel: I removed it quickly Oh yeah… sorry.

#unicornmanes #triggerwarnings:#slight mentioning of depression #very short scene with violence against inanimate object #Evan Thompson #Daniel Thompson

2 notes · View notes

justinmitchellfan · 9 months

Text

ARIANA GRANDE X MERCEDES VARNADO LOVE STORY SMUT WARNING ⚠️ PART 27 of the continuation of the she's the one love story

Chapter 57 title: home again

Mercedes point of view

Feeling a harsh hit on my ankle suddenly pulls me from my sleep, I jolt up, blinking as I look around, quiet snickers sound from beside me and my gaze lands on the woman laughing "you ain't shit as I shake my head, pulling myself up in my seat "gon kick me while I'm asleep says mercedes and kehlanis eyebrow raises at my first words "cause we about to land fool, put your seatbelt on says kehlani and I sit up almost instantly and pull my seatbelt on then looking behind me out the window to see lax getting closer and closer and we left London 10 hours ago st 7 am and having had breakfast while waiting for the jet to get ready, as soon as I was seated and cleared to remove my seatbelt I went back to sleep

Our final show of the tour is tonight at 11 which gives us around 4 hours to prepare for it and while I know I'll have time to spend with everyone after the show, I was really hoping I could get Least an hour with them, maybe a moment to be home but that ain't gonna happen and as the plane pulls into the private section of the airport, the pilot informs us we can get ready to get off and everyone unbuckles and stands up, getting their carry ons and stuff together before we're told we can exit the plane and one by one we all step off onto the tarmac, accepting our luggage and going into the private suite, chatting as we talk

Since I'm still kind of waking up, I don't even pay attention to the fact that we get through tsa and shit and I yawn, nodding along to kehlanis words as we talk and as she speaks I make the occasional sound of assurance that I'm listening, a hum or yeah or something and my eyes close as I stretch my arms out above me "mercedes says kehlani as I feel her hand lightly slapping my side and opening my eyes, I drop my gaze to see her nodding her head in front of us and with a frown I follow the nod, almost instantly stopped in my tracks and smiling at the sight in front of me

My sister returns my smile, head nodding at me and I nod back then I look beside her, my heart stopping then kicking into overdrive, a big beautiful smile forms on the Italian woman's face, her eyes bright and full of love and not giving a fuck about my bags, I drop them, taking a few steps towards Ariana who runs up and throws herself into me ,her legs wound around my waist, arms around my neck while my arms wrap around her waist "Holy fuck I've missed you so much says Ariana as she mumbles against my neck, sniffling a little as she squeezes me and I take a shaky breath and agree "I've missed you too baby, way too much says mercedes

Reaching a hand up, I gently cup her cheek, guiding her to lift her head then pulling her into a kiss and her lips mold perfectly against mine, the perfect mix of slight desperation and complete love expressed through the action, fingers slipping into my hair, she grips lightly and somehow pulls me closer and even if we were in a populated part of the airport I wouldn't care, I've gone weeks without feeling her lips on mine or being able to hold her and with kehlani and my sister still here we don't shift into a full make out session, instead pulling away with soft pecks exchanged right after "hi says Ariana as she mumbles against my lips

Chuckling a little, I smile and rub her sides with my thumbs "hi says mercedes and she bites her lips as if she's trying to hold back her smile then I gently let her down and her hand stays in mine even as she moves beside to talk to kehlani and I direct my gaze to Samia and smile "sis says mercedes "sis as Samia returns, coming over and wrapping her arms around me and I kiss the top of her head, hugging her with my free arm and we rock side to side a little, squeezing each other tight "damn I missed ya little sis as I tell her as we part, fully aware of how much she's grown and while it hasn't been much while I was away, she's gotten taller and filled out more over the past few months

If she weren't already dating Calvin I'd have to go to her school and check all the boys, we got the same genes and I'm sexy as hell so I know them dudes gon be looking and she smacks her lips, softly pushing my shoulder "shut up, I'm taller than the last time you saw me says Samia "and? You still smaller than me and that makes you little as I tease further, sticking my tounge out at her, her eyes roll and she walks around me to pick my bookbag up and she rolls my suitcase over and leaves it by my side and gently squeezing Arianas hand ,to get her attention, both she and kehlani look at me "yall ready to go as I smile softly at them

They both nod, kehlani saying "ima head to the venue, got meet and greets to prepare for, you better not be late to the last show says kehlani as she points at me with narrowed eyes then waves to ari and hugs my sister before walking off, her security coming out of nowhere to walk with her and turning to my wife and sister, I smile at them and we all leave, aris security escorts us through the more populated area of the airport and out to the car and my bags are put in the trunk as we get in the back, Samia sitting in the third row while me and ari sit in the two seats in the middle "so tell me about Berlin, no Switzerland says Samia as her eyes widen and she waves her hand "no no Barcelona, do Barcelona says Samia

I chuckle and shake my head "Barcelona was one of the most beautiful places we went, definitely in my top 5, we didn't get to explore much of it but the hotel I was in was like right around the corner from this strip of clubs and food stalls ,I loved the vibe there, the music, the people, the food, it was dope and I definitely gotta take yall sometime says mercedes and Ariana smiles, reaching across the chairs to take my hand and Samia smiles excitedly as if living vicariously through my words, immediately asking about Berlin afterwards and for the rest of the drive I tell my sister all about my travels, the people I met and cultures I was introduced to, I can't lie and say I don't absolutely love how excited she gets

In no time the car pulls to a stop and we get out and the sight of my home is more than welcomed one, it's been way too long and thanking the driver as he hands me my bags, I turn around and follow ari and Samia up the porch and into the house and I sigh happily the second my foot is through the door and when I hear the scratching of claws against the tiles i set my bag down and sit on the floor, in seconds all my furry buddies come running around the corner "oohh I missed yall as I exclaim, opening my arms as the dogs pile onto my lap, Myron jumps on his hind legs and presses his paw against my chest, effectively pushing me back as he sniffs at my face and hair

As all the dogs start nipping and sniffing at me, beau crawling up my chest, I'm reminded of the first time I'd ever hung out with Ariana "wait wait yall chill as I say, eyes slightly widening "beau no says mercedes as he tilts his head as if telling me 'you know ima do it anyway' "ari help me says mercedes and her little giggle sounds right before beau put his paw over my mouth, the rest of the dogs still messing with me and I'm left to be assaulted, Ariana and Samia walking away into the kitchen, u continue to playfully struggle with the dogs, laughing at them and their little barks and yips until I hear an all too familiar voice, one that never ceases to make me smile

"Now why are you on the floor with the dogs sweetie says Joan and moving my head to the side, I look up at the woman "Momma j as I move the dogs off my lap and hop up, quickly and excitedly closing the gap between me and the smaller woman, wrapping my arms around her in a big hug and she laughs happily, wrapping her arms around me in return, she squeezes tight and rocks us side to side a little and just being in her arms almost makes me want to cry a little, I'm hit with the kind of love and comfort one only gets from a mother, one I've been missing for a long time "I missed you ma as I tell her, not wanting to pull away just yet

"I missed you too sweetie, so much says Joan after another tight squeeze, she pulls back and cups my face with both hands "it's not quite as fun without you around says Joan and shrugging a little, I smile at her "lucky you, I won't be going anywhere else any time soon as my hands gently squeeze her arms and both our hands drop and with one arm around her shoulders, we go into the kitchen and I find not only Ariana and Samia but also Frankie and Nonna "brother as I exclaim happily at the sight of the, now pink haired, man and he let's out a little squeal and I step away from Joan just as he comes over "mercedes I missed you says Frankie as he exaggeratedly cries as we wrap each other up in a big hug

He starts jumping and I jump with him, both of us exuding excitement to see each other and when we part he smacks a big kiss onto my cheek and I laugh "missed you too bro says mercedes and from him I move to Nonna, our hug is much softer, her adorably wrinkled hand gently patting the back of my head "you look great honey, tour did you wonders says Nonna as she tells me once we part "thank you Nonna as I smile at her "you're looking as gorgeous as always says Nonna and a little blush rises on her cheeks and she waves me off "oh stop, you flatter me too much says Nonna "not possible as I kiss her cheek then move around the island

Arianas eyes follow me the whole way only stopping once I'm behind her, I slip my arms around her waist and hold her close, kissing her neck before my chin rests on her shoulder "yall comin to my show tonight as I direct the question to everybody "it's the last one so you know it's gon be the best as I continue and they immediately agree, saying they wouldn't miss it for anything and we hang around for about an hour, Joan whipping up some sandwiches and fruit as we talk and after catching up we head out, piling into the waiting cars that take us to the venue and tonight's show is at the Hollywood bowl and it is sold out, 17,500 people in one place all to see Mr and kehlani

A few years ago when I was new to this and if my last album didn't go platinum, I would argue that they were just here to see kehlani but I know better now, a lot of those people are here for me too and that's just crazy "ooo you got the best snacks says Samia for like the fifth time as she grabs another bag of cheetos and flops back on the couch, kicking her feet up on Frankie's lap, the man holding her legs so they don't slip abd I shrug, scanning through the outfits hanging up on the clothes rack "I really just came up with them on the fly when they asked what my rider was, I ain't have one then as I stop, stuck between the last four outfits

"At least you have one, now the next time you go on tour you'll have a rider says Frankie as he points out, sticking his hand in the bag of chips and eating a few "eh, I won't be goin on another tour for a while, I just wanna focus on myself and family for the time being, we'll see in a few years as I say nonchalantly then I look over to Ariana who's leaning on Nonna "baby, can you come help me real quick as her eyebrows raise and she pops up, coming over to me "I can't decide between these four says mercedes and her brown eyes meticulously look over each outfit then she stops and chooses one "here you go says Ariana as she holds it out to me with a smile

"Thanks wifey as I kiss her softly and take the outfit into the bathroom, quickly changing clothes and when I come back out, Frankie does a long wolf whistle and I laugh at him "looking good sib as he tells me and I smile and thank him "yall can head down to the pit, security has a section up ,seats and refreshments plus a perfect view of the stage as I direct my words towards all of them ,knowing I don't have long before I have to get onstage and nodding, they all get up and make their way out, Samia and Frankie snatch up some of my snacks even though I told them there's food in their section and the last person left is Ariana

Once the door shuts she turns to me, stepping closer and taking my hands in hers "vic just let me know that she and everyone else is here so I'm gonna get them before I head to the section says Ariana and I open my mouth to say something but she speaks before me "yes ill take a guard with me don't worry and don't you dare get anxious about going out there, I know it's a lot of people but they're your fans and they know just like I do that you're incredible, you're going to kill this show baby says Ariana and a smile forms on my lips and keeps growing the more she talks and I slip my arms around her waist, gripping her ass and pulling her into a heated kiss

She let's out a little sound of suprise that's quickly replaced with a quiet moan "thank you babe as I pull back a little more, gently running my finger over her bottom lip "ima kill it, cause I'm a badass and cause my girl gon be there cheerin me on as she hums a little and I kiss her quickly one more time "ight come on you gotta get everyone and get to ya seat before I'm on says mercedes and with that we both leave out, going our separate ways ,standing at the back entrance of the stage, I take a deep breath and roll my shoulders and Arianas words play over and over in my head and the beginning of my anxiousness are gone before they can even start

"Well Well, this is the first time I've seen you not looking like you about to bolt says kehlani as she comes up to stand beside me "your wife got a real good effect on you huh says kehlani and I chuckle a little "yeah she does, as I'm sure is supposed to be the case, spouses should have a good effects on each other and I like to think I have a good effect on her too says mercedes and the crowd starts screaming incredibly loud as the lights dim in prep for my entrance "hey as I look over at kehlani "I'm glad it was you I toured with, these past few months have been pretty damn awesome and a lot of the reason is you, you should swing by the house after the show, grab a drink and let me thank you properly says mercedes

She looks a little speechless, only nodding in reply and with a wink and a quiet chuckle, I turn to be mic'd up ,walking onto the stage as the intro to the song plays "yall don't mind that I'm takin it back right as the crowd screams as I speak, stepping from the shadow of the stage "climb on board, we'll go slow and high tempo, light and dark, hold me hard and mellow, I'm seeing the pain, seeing the pleasure, nobody but you, Body but me, body but us, bodies together, I love to hold you close, tonight and always, I love to wake up next to you, I love to hold you close, tonight and always, I love to wake up next to you "

The silence stretches ,my expression neutral as I look out at the crowd, my gaze ends on the pit, specifically the section my family is at, I see vic and Courtney recording, fangirling all loud and shit, Anthony is right alongside Frankie and Samia, all casual but still excited to see me perform, momma Joan and Nonna are sitting but still smiling at me and Ariana, she's front and center, absolute love and excitement in her eyes as she looks at me and our eyes meet and I start singing again "so we'll piss off the neighbors, in the place that feels the tears, the place to lose your fears, yeah, reckless behavior, a place that is so pure, so dirty and raw ,in the bed all day, bed all day, bed all day, fucking and fighting on, it's our paradise and it's our war zone, it's our paradise and it's our war zone"

The crowd sings along to the rest of the song, screams of my lyrics following as I switch from song to song and I switch up between each phase of my music throughout the set, going from my first ep to my newest album for a few songs, then to my first album and back "ayo, yall know I gotta hit a Lil sappy since this is my last show as heavy breaths leave my lips, sweat dripping from my forehead and my last song involved a big dance number "for real though, thank you for comin out ,for purchasin tickets and merchandise and shit and just showin yall support, none of this would be possible without yall, this on is for yall says mercedes

"Man they don't like me too much, I do shit that I want, i don't gotta be focused on havin all of they of , maybe I'll be your fall, maybe I'll make mistakes, maybe I do it all so you remember my name, break it down like" I get the whole crowd bouncing and rocking to my song, a familiar feeling rising up in me and just like the first time I performed on tour with chance and heard some people singing my lyrics, my heart swells with pride and joy, back then there were maybe 60 or so people singing my song and now there's thousands of them and the song comes to an end, my heavy breaths sounding in the mic as I say goodnight, thanking them again before telling them to get ready for kehlani

Backstage, my mic is taken off and I'm given a towel, just after I've wiped the sweat off my face and arms, a quick and slightly hard force hits my arm, following the source of the hit reveals kehlani "you killed that entire performance, that energy was like nothin before, I felt it when we were singin says kehlani as she shakes her head a little, a smile on her face "I loved watchin that performance, for real says kehlani and I shrug her compliment off "thanks Lani as I pull her into a quick one armed hug, her getting mic'd up after we part "still come by the house girl, got some Don Julio I ain't opened yet says mercedes

She rolls her eyes and nods "I'll be there, long as you stick around for my set says kehlani and from there I head through the venue to my dressing room and changing into another one of the outfits on the clothes rack and gathering my stuff from the safe, I snatch up a red bull and a few snacks off the table then head out to the pit "yooo says Anthony and I smile instantly at the voice, eyes looking up to the man who made made the noise "ant says mercedes and we run up to each other, practically slamming together in a hug, the hug lasts a minute, both of us having missed each other immensely "damn look at you boy as I pull back, my hand still on his arm "growin that beard out look good says mercedes

He laughs a little and squeezes my arm "says you, I'm diggin thus haircut my g says Anthony and I thank him, tapping his arm on good time before I move to the next person "vic as I beam with excitement at the sight of the woman and.d she pops up from her seat so damn fast "I missed you girl damn" suddenly she pulls away, face dropping "I'm sorry, I made a- says Victoria "aye its cool ,for real as I give her a reassuring smile "still adjustin ,I can't tell you thev number of times I've had to redo an important document cause I filled out female and not nonbinary and the fact that you caught yourself says somethin so don't sweat it says mercedes and Victoria nods "more importantly, I missed you too, how's my niece doin says mercedes

Her eyes playfully roll as I bring up hazel "she good, at home with her dad probably tearin the house up says Victoria and laughing at that, I shake my head "sounds like I'm missin out on all the fun says mercedes and once again she rolls her eyes and I move on to Courtney "I'm glad your back friend says Courtney as she tells me after we hug "your wife got annoyin while you were gone says Courtney and I snort a little at that, said woman coming over to us and Arianas arms slip around my midsection as she glares at Courtney "I wasn't annoying,I was lovesick says Ariana

"Awe as I pout and kiss the top of her head, wrapping my arms around her "I was too, missed my baby like crazy says mercedes and she pops up on her toes and kisses my cheek, squeezing me tight then sticking her tounge out at Courtney, her friend shakes her head, going back over to Vic and Anthony, flipping Ariana off as she does and I burst into laughter at the face Ariana makes, she looks so hurt ,reigning in my laughter, I walk over to the couch , smiling and nodding at Nonna and joan then sitting down on the couch before pulling Ariana down onto my lap

She looks over her shoulder at me and smirks, wiggling her eyebrows before grinding her ass against me and my eyes widen at her actions and I wrap my arms around her waist "you gotta chill girl as I speak quietly to her "we in public says mercedes and her eyebrow raises In that 'I don't really care' kind of way and my first thought is that she does until I remember what happened when we were in Brazil, we went out one night, walking down one of the many lively strips and there were people everywhere, music playing, the smell of good food everywhere and I stopped in front of one of the street bands and we started dancing

All the grinding Ariana was doing on me got us both pretty riled up but only one of us had patience to wait till we got to the hotel and we made out a bit before Ariana had enough, she took me to a not so discreet ,surprisingly clean, alleyway, I was shocked by her actions, I'm just glad the alley was dark and no one was being nosey, she was all over me that night "okay maybe you don't care but your brother, mom and grandma are right there so the least we can do is wait right says mercedes and she pouts ,turning sideways on my lap then gently dragging her nail down my collarbone "I'm sure they won't notice if we slip away says Ariana as her tone is overly suggestive

"I'm sure they would and they'd know why too as she huffs "chill baby, you know ima take care of you when we get home as I squeeze her waist, leaning forward and kissing her neck, gently biting a spot I know is sensitive and she moans quietly, squirming on top of me a little and she bites her lip to hold in another moan then turns to me ,gripping my chin and pulling me into a kiss and I resist the urge so as not to break the kiss and my thumbs gently caress her sides as she grinds into me again and even though I feel the shift in weight of the couch beside us I don't pull away not until the person speaks "damn, what yall gon do, fuck right here in front of everybody says Anthony

Ariana huffs against my lips ,lifting her head and glaring at Anthony "Maybe, if you hadn't interuppted says Ariana "um no as I say incredulously, looking at Ariana with a matching expression "you know damn well we wasn't bout to fuck in front of everybody says mercedes and her eyes roll and she smacks her lips "whatever, I better get some dick when I get home or it's gon be a problem says Ariana as she kisses me hard then gets off my lap and walks over to the girls and an amused expression is on Anthony's face when I look at him "ain't yall supposed to have some people over" " yup" "but she-" "mhm" and he snorts and laughs, pushing my shoulder as he does "that's funny as hell says Anthony

I glare at him "I wouldn't call it funny but ight as I reach over to the table beside the couch, checking the labels of the bottles in the I've bucket before I grab one of the peach flavored wine coolers "well as he starts as the lights on the stage dim, the crowds screams starting back up "at least you got somethin to look forward to tonight says Anthony and as the music starts and kehlani heads onto the stage, I smirk a little at the thought of what's to come, damn I missed home

Chapter 58 title: questioning

Mercedes point of view

A warm soft pressure filters across my neck, lingering at some spots for an extra second , the feeling slowly rouses me from my sleep, a quiet sigh slipping from my lips as I wake up and slipping back into reality allows me to understand what's happening and Arianas kisses trail down to my chest, peppering over my heart softly, the sensation brings a light smile to my face, that's quickly replaced with a tingly feeling as her hands drag down my sides ,nails scrapping my skin as she rolls her hips to grind against me and my morning wood Slightly twitches to her actions and I bite my lip, I feel her smirk against my skin as I place my hands on her hips "just didn't get enough last night huh as I teasingly ask, my voice raspy from sleep

Her teeth dig into the skin on my neck and she shakes her head "nope, I went two months without it, you can't really think one night was enough says Ariana and I chuckle softly and raise my eyebrow at her "without it or without me says mercedes and she lifts her head and looks into my eyes, fingers trailing down my abdomen to the top of my boxers "if I don't say you, do I still get it says Ariana as she licks her lips, sliding down my waist a little and slipping her fingers into my boxers "you sound so deprived, what kind of partner would I be if I didn't give you what you want as I ask rhetorically

In reply, she kisses me so passionately but still pretty quick then she slips down my body, her fingers hook around my boxers and she pulls them down with her and I lift my hips, letting her remove them and when she ever so gently wraps her hand around my dick ,dipping her tounge out to lick my tip, I smirk "don't tell me you're gonna be the only one having all the fun says mercedes and her eyes rise to mine, that questioning look in her eyes, I nod and she does and excited little wiggle, sitting up, she quickly shreds the only article of clothing she's wearing then crawls up the bed

The smooth skin of her thighs settle beside both sides of my head abd I softly kiss her thighs ,raising my gaze to the absolutely drenched sight of her pussy and I lick my lips and grab her waist, pulling her down some more "wait mercedes, you're not even hard yet says Ariana as she practically whines "I'm hard enough as I reply before pulling her down completely and I don't even try to suppress the moan that builds up at the taste of her but it's immediately drowned out by the long loud one she let's out, I smirk against her heat, sliding my hands down to grip her thighs, holding her in place as I eat her out

My focus on her is broken a little as I feel her tounge slowly teasing the tip of my dick, I wasn't lying when I said I was hard enough, pleasuring Ariana has always brought me pleasure and that hasn't changed and another moan leaves my lips ,sounding right against her as I start my actions back up and we seemingly start a little competition, Ariana taking my member into her mouth and matching the pace in which I eat her out and my goal is to always make her cum first but that appears to be her goal as well and every time I go faster she does too, moans and continuous sounds of pleasure echoing off the walls and slowly pulling my tounge from her heat, I suck her clit into my mouth and sge grounds her hips down, nails digging into my thighs as hers start to quiver

With that telltale sign that she's close, I move my hand up her inner thigh and easily slip my fingers inside of her, a few curls of my fingers against her walls and she's Cumming and I smirk, pressing a light kiss on her clit as I finger her through her orgasm and Ariana sucks a little harder as she pulls her mouth off of me, my fist clenching at the sensation, her brown eyes meet my gaze over her shoulder "fuck I hate you says Ariana breathlessly and her words make me chuckle and I take my fingers from her "well I love you Mrs grande as I place another soft kiss on her Inner thigh

Skillfully, she swings her legs from around my head, quickly straddling me, she reaches down, taking my member in her hold and lining it up with herself and ever so slowly she sinks down onto me and I drop my head back against the pillow, absolutely melting at the feeling of being inside of her again and I swear nothing could ever feel as amazing as this and as her hips roll, her hands slide up to my sides. My eyes trained on her as she leans down, kissing up my chest to my neck then up to the spot under my ear "don't you wanna cum for me baby says Ariana

The sound of her instantly slutry voice accompanied by the feeling of her pussy clenching around me sends a shiver down my spine, an all too familiar feeling building even more inside me and ever so perfectly, she circles her hips and grinds into me and her actions get the desired reaction from me and once again I clench my fists, a loud moan escaping me as I'm thrown over the edge and much like I did, Ariana smirks and I feel the curve of her lips against my skin and resist the urge to roll my eyes "I don't know why you smirkin, I made you cum first says mercedes finally coming down from her high and looking at Ariana

She smacks her lips, sitting up and rolling her eyes, clearly annoyed with me, she abandons her usual slow and sensual moves, instead quickly getting off me, my member slipping from her just as fast and mercedes snorts, watching Ariana get out of bed "awe, baby it was a joke says mercedes to Arianas retreating form and even as she goes into the bathroom I hear her mocking me, which just makes me laugh even more and when I hear the shower cut on, I decide to wait a second before going to join her cause I know it'll annoy her a little more and as I wait I think

Yesterday was the perfect end to the tour, a sold out venue, an amazing performance and all the love and support I could get from my family, even the after party was a blast and everybody showed up, momma Joan and Nonna stopping by for a bit ,we drank and ate, me and kehlani telling everybody about our little mini adventures in each cities we visited and with Anthony and the label knowing that I won't be working on another album anytime soon, I didn't even feel anxious about the pressure that would've brought on ,I'll still be doing appearances and little stuff to stay in the spotlight but like I told everyone, I want to give majority of my focus now to my family

Which is why I'll be spending today with Samia, being on tour meant I missed a couple of big things in her life, I wasn't there when she officially got a boyfriend, Calvin finally asking her out after the many dates they'd been on and I missed the huge party she had for being inducted into the national honors society and I missed her first ever music video appearance, she can dance even better than I can and Anthony knows that so he got her an audition to be a dancer in demis music video and she got it and it sucked knowing I missed that stuff and she told me not to worry whenever you called to congratulate her and show my support but again it still sucked

Especially since I knew things were tense between her and my mom because of the issues I have with mom "are you really not coming to join me says Ariana as she asks, pulling mercedes from her thoughts "of course I am says mercedes and we take a nice long shower together, exchanging short sweet kisses as we clean each other and after that we make up the bed, Ariana throwing on some stay at home clothes while I found an outfit suitable for public appearance then we head downstairs, filling all the dog bowls before we make breakfast, having small talk as we eat and once we're done ari let's the dogs out into the backyard and I clean up the kitchen and get ready to go

"Ight babe as I say, coming back downstairs and going into the living room "I'll be back in a bit as she lays her head back against the couch as I lean over her "okay, have fun, say hi to Sam and your mom for me says Ariana and my head shakes and I sigh "we'll see about that second part as I see that look in her eyes ,the one that tells me she wants to talk about it and while I would, I have to go "later as I drop down and kiss her lips a few times ,making her smile "I love you, see you later says mercedes "I love you too says Ariana as she calls as I leave out, effectively putting a smile on my face and the drive over to my moms house is pretty calm but the closer I get the more anxious I become

Things between me and my mom have been pretty bad for a while and when I made the decision to change my pronouns I could tell she wasn't fond of it by the way she respond with forced indifference but when I further decided to take hormones a.d get the surgery she blew up and she was completely against the idea of me doing something 'so drastic' to my body and she made it very clear and while everyone was there for me, especially during my recovery, she didn't even try to come see me and the tour was shortly after my recovery so we haven't seen or spoken to each other for months and pulling up into the driveway, I take a deep breath and slowly exhale before getting out and my anxiety rises with each step towards the house, I unlock the door and step inside

I'm unsure if the silence in the house is good or not but I slowly move further in, only to freeze once I reach the living room, my mom walks from the kitchen to the living room with a glass of wine, seemingly obvious to my presence as she sits on the couch and grabs the TV remote "um as I clear my throat the second I hear the slight crack "h-hey ma says mercedes and her head snaps up to the sound of my voice, gaze panning over to me and she has a neutral expression until a frown forms as she looks over my body and with a sigh, she shakes her head and turns to the TV, only looking at the black screen

"I'm completely done with tour now as I try to spark up a conversation, silently begging her to speak to me as I cross over to sit in the arm chair to the side of the couch "you missed the last show, ya kid performed in front of 17,000 people, no nerves either as I chuckle softly "even Nonna was up doin her Dancy dance while i- says mercedes "stop as she suddenly says and I instantly stop at the tone of her voice "don't come up in here and act like everything is fine mercedes, do you know how hard it is to even sit here with you as her question is clearly rhetorical but I still say no, which she scoffs at

The way her words instantly make me choke up isn't surprising to me, I mean, this is the woman who birthed me, who supported everything I did my whole life, 29 years of support and understanding just gone and I sigh, looking down at the floor as I sort through my thoughts then look back up at her "ma I get that it's a lot, it was for me too but can't you see that this isn't easy for me either, making these choices weren't easy but God, I needed it, you saw first hand how depressed I was, how uncomfortable I started to feel, I've never felt more happy and complete and me- says mercedes

"This isn't you as she's up and off the couch in seconds, taking a step backwards "me and your father gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, who we both knew would grow to be an extraordinary, gorgeous woman, if he saw you right now, if he saw the decisions you made, do you know what he would say says momma y/mn and me eyes instantly welled with tears, my breathing became irregular as I tried not to cry at the onslaught of thoughts and up until now I thought my father would be proud of me and one of the many things he always taught me was to be myself but would he have still felt that if this is what it meant to be me, insecurities swell inside me and continue to do so as she keeps speaking

"If he were here to see that his daughter- says momma y/mn "mom what the hell says Samia as her voice abruptly cuts my moms words off and while my mom is shocked at Samias words, I'm still frozen, I keep blinking in an attempt to dry my eyes but it isn't working and Samia appears through my peripherals, dropping her purse down "how could you say something like that, it's one thing to express your disagreement with their decision even though it's clearly hurting them but to further that hurt by speaking about their deceased fathers thoughts, you don't know what he would've said and I can't believe you would stoop that low says Samia "Samia as I try to stop her

"No mercedes, you're incredible and your dad would've loved you unconditionally says Samia looking directly at mom with that last word "I love you mom but everything about what you just said was wrong, I already have to put up with your little mumbles about mercedes when she's not around but that was too far says Samia and my sister shakes her head and turns back to the stairs and I get up, not even looking at my mom as I head to the door "Sam I'll be out in the car as I tell her then leave and taking a very shaky breath, I get back in the car, I feel the tear escape my eye and slide down my cheek and I quickly wipe it away, my hands grip the steering wheel as I try to reign in my emotions

I raise my head in time to see Samia coming out of the house, a duffel bag now in hand that she discards in the back seat "hope you don't mind if I stay with you and ari for a few days, I think our mother needs some time alone says Samia as her words are full of anger and all I can do is nod and my sister sighs and looks over at me, her hand soothingly rubbing my back "mercedes, nothing she said is true and just because she's not understanding of what you did and why doesn't translate to how your dad would've felt, from what I hear he adored you and he still would've even after you changed your pronouns and got surgery says Samia

I nod, taking another deep breath "yeah says mercedes and she gently squeezes my shoulder "we don't have to go to the pier, I know that was a lot and- says Samia "hey no way as I try my best to smile at her "we haven't hung out, just the two of us, in months so we're gonna go have some fun, now put your seatbelt on says mercedes and we both buckle up and I pull out of the driveway, Samia has complete control over the aux as I drive and I can tell from her song choices that she's trying to cheer me up, at one point she even plays steal her man

When we get to Santa Monica, I find a fairly decent spot and we get out of the car, Samia secures her purse around her body and I walk up beside her, throwing my arm around her shoulders and I pay for us to get into pacific park "alright what're we tryin first sis as I ask looking down at Samia then up at the surrounding area and she looks around as well then says "we gotta do pacific plunge before we start eatin and stuff says Samia "bet says mercedes and we both head over to the ride, getting in line and with it being summer, the park is packed which is a good thing for me and people are pretty distracted with their families and having fun so my 'disguise' of glasses and a hat go unnoticed

The ride isn't bad as I'd expected it to be, I mean being brought 40 something feet in the air the dropped back down like I weigh Nothing isn't something I shrug off but I've been on worst rides and from there we get on the sea dragon, a swinging roller coaster then on the west coaster, a normal Rollercoaster that goes out over the ocean a bit and we take a break to get food, splitting up for a moment to grab multiple items and the second I'm no longer beside my sister, my mind goes back to what my mom said

Of all the things she said when we first fell out ,of all the things I expected her to say, what she did say earlier hurt like fucking hell, I still can't believe she said it and even worse, it sounded like she meant it and she knew my dad longer than I did, since they were teenagers, if anyone knows how ge would've felt it's her right "aye, I got the funnel cake, churros and deep fried oreos says Samia and Samias voice grabs my attention and I shake my head to try and free the thoughts and I know she catches the somber expression on my face before I can change it to another fairly fake smile

"Yessir as I try to be excited "been waitin on those churros ad I slide the tray across the table to me "you gotta dig into that chicken sandwich ,when me and ari came here, I had it and man oh man, it bang says mercedes and my sister is pretty quiet while we eat, she's on the phone a lot but I can't blame her, this outing must suck with the bad mood I'm in and we finally finish up, stacking up the trash and throwing it away, starting to walk around some more "you gon let ya big sib win you a prize as I ask Samia once we get to the game stalls section of the pier

She nod unenthusiastically and I hold back a sigh, guiding her to a few games, I beat the first one we go to, a long range basketball game and she chooses a little lion stuffed animal and I do another one and choosing this adorable purple Llama for Ariana and as we're heading to another game Samia stops me "aye mercedes um, can we maybe call it a day, it's gettin hot and I'm kinda tired says Samia "oh uh, fasho sis, let's het you a water first as my shoulders kind of sag as we go to get the water then leave the pier and she controls the music again as we ride, these songs are a little more calm but still my favorites so it's clear she's still trying

I sing along with her to a few of them as I drive, glad to see the small smile on her face and instead of staying in the driveway, I pull into the garage beside aris truck and we get out and I take Samias bag, carrying it inside the house for her "you know the drill, this yo house so do ya Thang, I'll take this to the- as I stop in my tracks at the sight in my living room and spread out all over the room are my friends and family, Anthony, court, Frankie, vic, John, hazel, momma Joan and Nonna "um, hello people says mercedes confusedly, setting Samias bag down "what yall doin in my house says mercedes

"Mercedes as they all exclaim, hazel drops her toys and runs, slightly wobbling over to me "zellie as I scoop her up into my arms and give her a big hug "you've grown everyday haven't you as I can't believe she's already two "mercedes as she exclaims all late, making me smile, everyone laughs a little at it as well and I set the little girl back down, once again looking around at everyone and the first thing I notice is the way they all keep looking over at me, very calculating looks in their eyes "so mercedes says Victoria "how are you says Victoria

Right then it all clicks, why Samia was on her phone throughout lunch, why she seemed so distracted while we were walking around and why she wanted to leave so suddenly and with a soft sigh and a shake of my head I look over at her, a sheepish look on her face "come here as I stretch my arm out and she walks into my hug "thanks sis as I tell her, kissing the top of her head and a big smile is on her face when we part "ight, it's a beautiful day let's not waste it inside says mercedes and everyone collectively takes some time to get stuff together to go outside and Anthony and John dip off to the store to get ice and drinks, the ladies all head out to the backyard and Ariana let's the dogs out with them all while I take a moment to head upstairs

Once in the quiet of my room, I shut the door behind me and go over to the bed, sitting on the edge, burrying my face in my hands and I'm not alone with my thoughts for long, the bedroom door opening and closing when I feel tiny little scratches on my leg and I lift my head a little, on the floor, eagerly clawing at my leg is beau and he practically pouts, tilting his head with a little whine as if asking if I'm okay "yeah I'm alright buddy as I reach down and scratch his head "are you says Ariana and my eyebrows raise and I look up at Ariana, clearly the one who let beau in "yeah but only alright as I pick beau up, petting him once he settles on my lap "Samia tell you what my mom said says mercedes

She moves across the room to sit beside me, our sides pressed together as she takes my free hand "she only told me that you tried talking to your mom and it didn't go well, we were in a group chat so she kept it simple, just told everyone to come by and help cheer you up says Ariana and I try to figure out how to word it but the more I think about what my mom said the more it starts hurting again and I swallow the lump in my throat, subconsciously squeezing my wife's hand "do you think my dad would've approved of my surgery says mercedes "oh my God as Ariana leans forward to look at me clearer "did your mom imply that he wouldn't says Ariana as her tone is a mix of suprise and irritation

"She did and i- now I can't help but think that maybe he wouldn't, if he were alive, my decision would've hurt him, he would've lost a daughter because of me, God he would've been so broken as I let out a choke of a sob, covering my face again as the dam finally breaks, tears continuously sliding down my face and both beau and Ariana instantly start comforting me as Ariana wraps her arms around me and pulls me up against her chest, beau nuzzles his head against my stomach and whines a little

Ari let's me cry for a bit, waiting until I start taking those stutter like breaths to say something "I can only imagine that it's hard for you to try and guess how your dad would respond and it's easy to believe your mom would know since she's spent more time with him but I refuse to believe he wouldn't have supported you and from all the stories you've told me, the pictures and videos I've seen, mercedes he loved you whole heartedly and that never would've changed says Ariana "your mom knows that too as Ariana continues "that's why it was incredibly unfair of her to even think to put those kinds of thoughts into your head

How she feels about you and the decision you made, doesn't translate to how your dad would've felt and I know this is hard, i know these feelings aren't going to be gone tomorrow but more than that I know you, you're incredible mercedes and you always will be and there's a group of people down there who love you unconditionally and we're all here for you and we're not going anywhere no matter what says Ariana and my breathing finally calms down, tears stop falling and I sniffle, I wipe my eyes and lift my head ,looking beside me at the gorgeous brunette woman and she gives me the sweetest most gentle smile and my heart melts

About a million words I want to say to her swirl around my mind but I can't even sort through them quickly enough and they all revolve around one feeling though and I express it the best way I can and surging forward, I kiss her deeply and my hand slips up to cup the back of her neck, holding her ad I pour the emotions I'm feeling into the kiss and it's a long one that leaves us both breathless once it's over "I can't tell you enough how much I love you as I whisper to her

"I am eternally grateful for your support and care and love, half the time i- I don't know how I would've gotten through certain things without you as a bright beautiful smile forms on Arianas lips "you're my world, everything I could've asked for and more says mercedes "now I'm gonna cry says Ariana teasingly and a little snort falls from my lips before I laugh, moving my hand to cup her cheek before I kiss her softly again "please don't, we both don't want to walk out of here teary eyed says mercedes and she giggles a little then nods "you're right says Ariana as she deftly swipes under her eyes then stands up

"Go wash your face baby, our family is waiting to cheer you up says Ariana "alright alright as I get up heading to the bathroom with a smile and with Arianas words in my head and the sudden sounds of everyone's laughs and squeals and shit, I feel the negative feelings from earlier slipping to the back of my mind and like ari said, this won't completely go away immediately but that doesn't mean I have to let it weigh me down for the rest of the day

1 note · View note

sorvon · 1 year

Text

eyemaster x reader x bevil. first pov: (i/im/my). lowercase intended. fem parts included, but if you're quirky, you can just imagine something that'll make sense.

as per usual, it was a round by myself. floor four, two entities — bevil and eyemaster. oh, how i was very lucky... i sighed, gripping at my flashlight whilst walking through flora's map. in my other hand, my edt as it flashed from green to orange.

my anxiety spiked as i became worried. no invisibility, no sparkle cola, no deter beacon... "fuck," i muttered, in which tagged, biting the inside of my cheek as i walked further. i knew the placements perfectly, though the obstacle was eyemaster and bevil...

"no, no! why did you have to—" cutting myself off with a groan, i threw down my dead flashlight. i kicked it to the side, deciding to risk it. what's the worst that could happen?

my edt flashed, orange to red.

trying my best to use the flora lights as any way to see, i couldn't even get a glimpse of where the entities were at. i bit my lip, hoping that the light would turn green. though, as i hoped for such, i assume it wasn't enough.

feeling a rough impact colldie into me, i fell to the ground. before i could move, purple eyes stared into mine as a jester's hat rested upon his head. a deep growl came from him as his strong grip kept me on the ground. my face began to feel hot as my chest tightened with nervousness. my entire body felt tensed yet numb, the fear within taking to my veins as i cowered below him. i felt like a bunny below a fox; prey.

as i tried to struggle my way out, i felt his hands— somehow— grip tighter, enough to feel my pulse in my wrists. upcoming footsteps approached as i saw a luminous red. his red eyes stared down at me, all pointing my way as he crouched down to my laid form.

i didn't understand the looks they were giving, why they seemed so... hungry. why? i don't kn— oh...

my eyes slowly looked down to their large lengths, both twitching in eagerness for any friction or touch.

so... that's why?...

well...

i glanced up at them both, seeing their eyes still hungrily looking down at me. with hesitation, i reached my hand down to eyemaster's length. slowly, i stroked whilst peering up. his eyes closed as he felt my palm on his erection, hips slowly bucking as he growled.

bevil, who seemed more lust-filled, move up as he crouched by my mouth. parting my lips, i felt him pull his cock into my mouth, pumping slowly in and out. his pace subtly fastened, becoming inpatient. he face-fucked me, drool soon coming down my mouth as my eyes watered, all while i stroked eyemaster's cock to the best of my ability.

my thumb traced his vein upwards to his tip, rubbing the print of the finger on the black slit as pre-cum formed. the light, glowing red slowly came out. his growls were low, barely audible to anyone but me.

bevil's hand gripped my hair, tugging as he began bucking his hips faster in a more forceful pattern. his rough thrusts muffling my whimpers and moans. as eyemaster's desperate state soaked my hand with pre-cum. my thighs clenched at their rough behavior, feeling heat pool between them. my clit throbbed as my wetness became unbearable.

bevil's balls slapped against my chin, slobber strands connecting between them. bevil, with a growl, pulled away as he began to forcefully stroke his cock. opening my mouth, my tongue out, his ropes of cum went into my mouth, some landing on the corners of my mouth.

eyemaster wasn't long to follow his release, cumming along my cheek and down my hand and forearm. his eyes flickered between red and black, his growls deep as he rode his high. he pulled away as bevil stared at me expectantly. his fingertips tapped the bottom of my chin, almost as a signal to swallow. doing as wanted, i swallow his cum. it was white, yet sweet and thick. it was pleasant, although odd to the tongue.

feeling hands at my sides, my pants were torn off and i was roughly picked up, gasping at the suddenness. eyemaster stood in front whilst bevil was behind— assuming he was the one who picked me up. his hands held my thighs as eyemaster gripped my waist. my hands found their way to his shoulders, knowing what was going to happen.

although i wasn't expecting such, i wasn't against it...

their tips probed at my entrances, left over cum on their tips being used as lube. slowly, i felt bevil push first in. his cock feeling larger inside. i moaned, throwing my head back to meet his shoulder, the pleasure tipping on the edge of pain. eyemaster pushed in after, a growl escaping as he twitched within me.

i gripped tighter at his shoulders as he quickly rammed into me without time to adjust, bevil becoming increasingly rougher. i cried out as my thighs shook, my face hot as i gasped for air between the suddenly fast movements of their lengths. it was overwhelming, yet i wanted it to never end. i loved the feeling of their cocks ripping me apart as i shook in their embraces. as if i was nothing but a free use toy for their own desires.

sandwiched between, i could feel them getting near as their cocks twitched. i, too, was desperate for the upcoming orgasm. bevil held onto my shaking hips with more force as eyemaster threw his head back with a low groan. they became sloppy, almost animalistic in their movements, all self-control lost and gone. i gasped as i felt eyemaster's cum first, pumping me full as bevil followed after.

my head began to feel lightheaded, blacking in and out of consciousness. the inhumane amount of semen gushing out of my holes. it was hard to breathe or speak, especially when they'd pumped me so full that i could taste their cum.

once they pulled out, i felt arms wrap around underneath me, laying me on the dirt ground. their footsteps hitting the soil as the final countdown echoed in the distance. too weak to anything, i laid silently as i caught my breath, the dampness beneath my bare skin being somewhat comfortable.

even if i were to die, at least i'll die full of cum.

#eyemaster #bevil #minusdescendance #md #sorvone #fem reader

1 note · View note

farfromstrange · 1 year

Text

Foreigner's God | m.m

Previous Chapter ° Series Masterlist

Chapter Forty-Four: Cold As You

Summary: Eliza searches for answers in the one person she thought she would never have to see again, but she is desperate to figure out what is going on with her mind. Breaking into SHIELD proves harder than planned and she finds herself with more decisions to make than she wanted, and finally hits back at the man who ruined her life.

Warnings: ANGST, nightmare, panic attack, blood, emotional hurt/comfort, attempt at humor, bad legal talk, Infinity War & Endgame spoilers, allusions to child molestation, mentions of past mental manipulation and torture, mentions of suicide, mentions of sex (but nothing explicit), fixing the Karen erasure by giving her a time to shine

A/n: I'm back at it with the angst. It's been a while since I've written something darker, so I'm finally making my big ANGST comeback because it is written in capital letters and we all know what that means... take the warnings seriously, please. Also, this only has like 9,000 words. I managed to get under 10,000?? That is new for me and I'm kind of proud of myself for keeping this on the shorter end. Have fun reading! (Also, thank you all for your support! It really means the world to me and I can't wait to continue this story with you all)

She was trapped in the circle again. The crystals around her drove in circles around her, offering no point of escape. What were they trying to tell her? They were speaking a language she didn’t recognize, voices only she could hear inside her head. They kept getting louder like a swarm of bees in her eyes, or the flapping of million of flies’ wings.

She pressed her hands to her temples, trying to keep her head upright, but the noise only kept getting louder and louder and louder to the point she felt as if she was about to explode. Her brain couldn’t comprehend the pictures she saw, the blue and purple galaxy around her, and the voices that were familiar yet so strange.

Out of the fog, a familiar face appeared. “Matt?” she asked. His picture was getting clearer now.

The stones wouldn’t let her through. She was forced to watch in horror as his limbs turned to dust and he fell to his knees, disappearing into the floor. He was swept away by the universe.

“No,” she slapped a hand in front of her mouth, “This can’t be real. This isn’t real.”

Beginning to slap her cheeks, she squeezed her eyes shut to somehow escape the hell she was trapped in. But as soon as she did, she was falling again, and this time the ground seemed too far out of reach. She was free falling to her death. She wished she could turn to dust like the man she loved, it would make the suffering worthwhile, but she was alive and she was forced to see what her existence meant. Destruction, chaos, blood, and death.

She was caught in a time loop, it seemed, where she had to watch her friends and family living and dying. The same thing happened over and over again, in different places and different colors. The lines across the universe broke apart with every picture she saw, the stones traveling the same distance she was falling.

She had to watch the man she loved die over and over again, in all kinds of cruel ways. Every time she tried to reach for the open hole in the galaxy to save him, another gush of wind made her fall even faster. She could scream his name as many times as she wanted to, but he continued dying with every flashing picture, and she couldn’t stand it anymore. She was crying. She couldn’t lose him anymore, she couldn’t watch him turn to dust over and over again; she just needed this hell to stop.

Eventually, though, she accepted her fate. And when she opened her eyes, the stones exploded into a thousand tiny pieces and she finally hit the same mirror she had once broken. The galaxy broke apart, holes were torn into the sky, red clouding her vision, and she woke up with a loud gasp, trying to get the lost air into her lungs.

Distraught, her arms flailed wildly to get rid of the suffocating touch on her arm. “Sweetheart,” Matt’s voice reached through to her. He wasn’t dead, although it felt as if she was dreaming once again. He would turn to dust if she touched him, she was sure of that.

Dust… why dust?

“Baby. Baby, look at me!”

She was panting, eyes switching between the wall and the door. What if someone came in to hurt them, but they would leave her and killed him instead? Just to hurt her, they would kill him. It would be her fault.

She jumped out of bed, hands at the ready to fight whatever enemy would come their way. She wasn’t quite present yet, and no matter how cold the floor felt under her feet, reality only seeped in agonizingly slowly and kept the alarms in her head burning brightly. The sound made it impossible for her to hear anything.

Matt sat on the bed, his hair disheveled, and his sightless eyes pointed somewhere at the wall next to her. They were wide, eyebrows raised, and his mouth slightly agape. He stretched his arm out. He wasn’t the enemy, but she knew that. She was waiting for someone else to come through the door. She wasn’t scared of him, she was scared of what was out there.

“Eliza,” he said her name, and she knew it was serious. It made her mind reel in a completely different direction, what are you doing?

She looked around, not sure what to say. She wasn’t sure what was happening.

“Liz, hey,” he kept his voice soft, “It was just a dream. You’re okay, I’m not trying to hurt you. You’re safe here. I need you to breathe. Can you breathe for me?”

She tried, but she couldn’t. Her back hit the wall and she slid down slowly, knees pulled up to her chest. The water rose to her lungs.

He scrambled out of bed and knelt before her. “Okay, I need you to breathe. Focus on your breathing,” he said. “I’m here, you’re okay, I just need you to breathe for me.”

Eliza stared into his eyes through the tears that blurred her vision. She looked at him as she tried to get the air back in through her nose and out through her mouth. She followed his instruction, the world slowly becoming clearer with each passing second, and the burning in her chest turned into a tiny flame that she could stomp out.

“There you go. Good girl. You’re okay.”

She shivered, wrecked by a sudden wave of sobs. “You died,” she choked out. “You died so, so many times. I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t save you. I can’t- I don’t know what’s happening to me, Matt. I’m scared. My head- my head is splitting. The world is falling apart. Space and- and time, everything’s breaking. I can’t- I can’t stop it. It won’t stop. Make it stop!”

He was next to her suddenly, wrapping his arms around her shoulder and pulling her into his chest. Matt held her tightly, her ear pressed to his left, right over his beating heart. He covered the other, tuning out the noise around them. He rubbed soothing circles over her heated skin and the bandage he could now smell the blood out of. She popped her stitches when she was writhing in bed, probably leaving the wound wide open. Eliza didn’t seem to notice. She was crying so heavily, he considered shaking her to get her to stop and breathe. He hated to feel the pain she was in but not knowing how to stop it or make it easier for her to deal with.

The sound of his heartbeat coaxed her back into consciousness, his hand on her ear stopping the screaming in her head. She exhaled, the sobs subsiding but leaving her shaking, still. She clawed at his shirt. He was her lifeline.

“You’re doing so good,” he murmured into the crown of her head.

Her muscles relaxed, melting into him, and she let him carry her.

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered.

They were lying in bed and had been doing so for a while before she allowed herself to speak.

Matt shushed her. “Don’t apologize. I get nightmares too.”

“This was different. It felt so… real.”

“Our minds can play cruel tricks on us.”

“I had the same dream while I was knocked out. What is happening to me?”

She hoped he would offer her something she could hold onto that would make her feel less insane.

“You hit your head,” he said. “Pair that with the blast of alien tech, I think you were just confused. I could feel the power in the air, and it was stronger than anything I felt before. You took the whole force, so I don’t think you’re going crazy, your head is just a little banged up right now.” To underline his words, he stroked her hair back. “But you’re okay,” he reassured her, “because you’re not alone. I have you.”

That sufficed. “Okay, thank you,” she said.

“Get some rest now. I’ll make sure the demons stay away.”

“Matt?”

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

“I love you more.”

She fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeat.

The next day was a blur. Eliza sat over the legal files she was supposed to write a report on, but all she could think about was that godforsaken dream. All she could think about was the pictures she saw, the stones and the endless fall, and on top of that, she kept thinking about a gigantic lie she carried with herself and now had to entertain because it was too late to tell him — Sister Maggie is Matt Murdock’s mother. It kept continuously hitting the back of her head like a bouncing ball.

How does one go about dealing with such knowledge? There was the possibility of a multiverse, a threat she couldn’t put her finger on and then there was her boyfriend, someone so kindhearted, he didn’t deserve to be lied to, but she did it anyway. She did the one thing she promised herself she would never do because she knew damn well what it felt like to be lied to.

Her head hurt and so did her heart. Everything hurt. Her soul was torn apart. Her head was splitting. She wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep her composure.

She needed to understand why she dreamed what she had dreamt. She needed to understand what was happening to her heart, why her powers were acting funny, and why the infinity stones she saw were suddenly trying to speak to her when she was close to them, even if it was just a hallucination. Reality works in funny ways and she could feel it in her hands. Time ran through her fingers like an hourglass.

Eliza figured the happiness she had felt before wouldn’t last. It was the calm before the storm. She couldn’t let this destroy her life or her relationship like the secret of Matt’s mother would if he ever found out she lied to him. She had to keep quiet for his sake and partly for hers. It was selfish, but she didn’t care. The truth would tear him to shreds, Father Lantom was right. It was too late to pull out now, anyway.

Her father was dead, and so was her mother. Her file told the truth about her heritage and what she was born with, but it didn’t go into detail. The video Anton left her explained nothing, it only made her feel more guilty about selling him out and made forgiveness an easier task. The letter her mother left her was just as useless when viewed from a rational standpoint that relied on facts and figures. She didn’t know what was happening, and the foreshadowing of her parents did nothing but put her on edge when she thought back to what she heard.

Who else could help her? Bruce was lost somewhere, Tony wasn’t a doctor, Happy was just a man and she couldn’t go to a doctor’s office and have her checked out. The only people who knew or could figure out what was going on were either dead or off the planet — Thor and Asgard could help; she was half confused why they hadn’t shown as her father predicted, but perhaps they were right about her purpose and she was worth more on earth than somewhere else. Right now, she didn’t care though. She needed to know.

She thought about Mueller. He killed himself. He could have found answers, but he died too. They were all dead. All of the sources she could have turned to were gone and so she was left with a burden too heavy for her to carry.

Except there was one person. The man who raised her. The man who helped shape her into what he wanted her to be.

“Oh, no,” she muttered to herself.

It was not a thought she was supposed to have. But she was desperate and desperate people make stupid decisions, especially her. She swore she would stop being reckless, but opinions tend to change and hers switched as soon as the thought crossed her mind. She hated the thought, but her mind told her that it was the only way, and even the rational part of her agreed. This wasn’t being reckless, this was being desperate for answers, and she would take the risk gladly.

The door to the conference room was open, but she still missed when Karen came in. “Hey, is your wifi working?” she asked.

Eliza jolted, her head shooting up. When she saw her colleague, she closed her eyes and sighed a breath of relief.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. I should have knocked.”

She waved it off. “It’s fine, I’m just a little jumpy lately,” she said. “Not your fault.”

Checking the icon on the bottom left of her laptop, she noticed the exclamation mark next to the wifi symbol.

“Yeah, no, mine’s out.”

“Great,” Karen cursed, “I was just doing our tax reports and the damn wifi stops working halfway through.”

“Have you tried banging on the router?”

“I did, yeah. Twice. It’s not working.”

“Okay,” Eliza rose to her feet, “Let me take a look at it. Sometimes it’s a glitch in the system. I’ll see if I can fix it.”

She sighed, “You’re a lifesaver.”

One look at the router told her that the issues with the wifi were caused by how old it was, and they chose the cheapest model, too. She hit it with twice Karen’s strength, almost breaking the plastic, but then the lights went on and her laptop chimed in response.

Karen beamed. “Thank God!”

“You need to hit it harder, sometimes to the point it almost breaks,” Eliza explained, “Or else it’s just not gonna work. But now that we’re already on the issue, we should work on getting you better internet. This thing is old as fuck.”

“It was the cheapest,” she jumped to her defense.

“I know, but you guys are financially stable now and I want to make sure it stays that way. Functioning internet can go a long way.”

She looked between the offices on either end of the room. “Where are they, anyway?” she asked.

“They-” Karen’s frown told her that she was supposed to know why Matt’s office was empty and Foggy was nowhere in sight either. “They told us earlier that they had a meeting at lunch,” she said. “They were going to check the police station for possible cases. They do that sometimes. You don’t remember?”

Anyone else would have made fun of her for being so forgettable, but she just looked concerned.

It dawned on her. They did say that in the morning, Eliza remembered. Looking at the clock, she also realized that it had been five hours since then and that she spent the duration of those five hours staring at a blank page.

“Huh,” she scoffed. “You’re right, I completely forgot.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just… I haven’t slept that much last night.”

“Oh, because of-” her smirk turned suggestive and the heat rose to her cheek at what she was suggesting.

“No!” Eliza stammered. “We didn’t- it’s not because of that. Jesus, no. At least not last night.”

Karen’s smirk grew even bigger. “Okay, that might be too much, but is he any good?”

Her blush deepened.

“'cause, I mean, he is attractive. Foggy said he was quite active in college, so I was just wondering. Two hot people-”

“Wait,” she said, “Two- you find me hot?”

“What?” It was Karen’s turn to stammer. “Well, I- okay, this is getting weird.”

She was bright red now, too, her pale skin making it easy to see the embarrassment embedded in her skin. Her blue eyes turned anywhere but forward, hands fidgeting, and she made sure the hair fell into her face to cover most of her blush. It didn’t work.

Eliza licked her lips, scratching her temple, then turned back to her. “He is good,” she answered. The situation grew no less weird, but at least she steered off the awkward conversation about why Karen found her hot, not that it mattered, but they weren’t exactly close friends that would say such things about each other.

“How good?” Karen questioned. “I’m not asking this because I’m a pervert,” she chuckled, a high-pitched sound in the hot office air, “No, I’m just asking because I am getting way too little action, like none at all and I was just curious. I need to hear crazy sex stories or I might go crazy.”

“Six times good.”

“In one night?”

“Sometimes seven. Eight when I don't tap out first. The highest we went was ten, I think, but that was with snack breaks. And yes, in one night."

“Oh, God!” She slumped into her chair. “I need sex. Like, I need sex that is that good. I mean, honestly, ten times? And you-" Karen wasn't sure how to phrase it, and she was too much of a chicken to say it flat out.

"Cum?" She had absolutely no filter. "Oh, I do. I always do. Did you think the ten times were all for him?"

"Oh, that sounds so good."

"It is good. Amazing, mind-blowing, out of this world," Eliza counted down all the adjectives she could find to describe just what it felt like to have sex with Matt, but nothing cut even close and she felt proud that he was so incomparable.

She whined again. "Ugh! Why does life hate me? I'd be happy with just one orgasm, but I just can't find a man that knows how to do shit."

Eliza hated what desperation did to her. She had always been rather sneaky, but this was a new one. The worst part was, she didn’t feel guilty. She wasn’t doing this just to be selfish, it was a quid pro quo, but poor Karen didn’t even know what she would be helping her do.

She pulled a chair toward her desk and settled down. Other than Natasha, she never had a real friend of the same sex that she could share steamy stories with. Not sure how those relationships worked, she decided she would try her best going by what she observed.

“Let’s make a deal,” she said.

Karen raised her eyebrows. “A deal?” she asked.

“Yeah, a deal. I’m going to tell you something now. I’m going to tell you what happened behind what you saw on the news because I want you to know that I take this seriously, and then you’re going to do me a favor. In return, we are going to hit the streets and I am going to help you get laid. I know quite a few places here in New York where you can find good-looking guys or girls, whatever floats your boat. The quality of the sex needs to be judged first though 'cause I think finding a Matt Murdock is impossible, but anyway! The question is, do you trust me?”

She seemed taken aback. The sun hit her blonde hair in a way that made it look red. Karen contemplated, weighing the pros and the cons, and then settled on an answer.

It was an unconventional friendship, but she needed one of those.

“I trust you,” she said. “So, we have a deal, as long as you won’t lie to me.”

“We have a deal, that kind of secures my promise of honesty. I used to be an Avenger, and we take loyalty seriously.”

Loyalty. She was a hypocrite. She lied to Matt, the person she swore her undying honesty to, and she broke that. He didn’t yet know she broke it, but he would find out eventually. All of the decisions she made would come back to haunt her and bite her in the ass. She would be the one to ruin their relationship, she would ruin the future Matt seemed to be planning and she would ruin all the good she built for herself in such a short amount of time. It only took one bad decision and everything was back to being as fucked up as it used to be.

At the beginning of the retelling, Karen didn’t think much. She expected to encounter some information that would mess with her brain, but she was prepared for setting foot into a world so foreign yet so close. She had been around for the Battle of New York, and she knew that aliens existed and what they could do. She knew about the Avengers, accepted what they could do, and accepted there were things she could never truly understand if she didn’t live the same life as the group of heroes.

When Sokovia happened, she watched the news in shock, but her life had already been messy enough back then to care. When Lagos happened, she found herself wondering about how dangerous mutants might be, and then the Sokovia Accords were set in place to control the very mutants she questioned before. She never once agreed with the decision made by the court. Of course, mutants were different, but they weren’t more dangerous than the criminals walking the streets, and treating them like animals weren’t the right way to approach the topic.

She wasn’t a big fan of Tony Stark, especially not after what happened with Union Allied and the fight with Fisk that almost broke them apart. She hated rich people. It was a part of her she didn’t want to change. To her, billionaires were pretentious bastards and deserved nothing. She was an anti-capitalist, and she stood by that.

Though as Eliza told her the story of what she had been through, she started to understand more about why she was the way she was. It broke her heart. She treated her like an intruder when she was anything but, and she would curse herself for a long time for what she did.

“Your staring is quite unsettling,” said Eliza. Her words had long faded and she watched Karen intently for a sign of life. “I know this was a lot, but maybe you can say something?”

She swallowed. “I’m-” Why did her voice sound so weak? Karen cleared her throat and tried again to say, “I’m so sorry.”

“Oh, thank God, you’re alive.”

“You- you almost died because you were shot?”

“Yes.”

“Hydra took you as a child, experimented on you, tortured and brainwashed you, turned you into an assassin, but then SHIELD saved you, trained you to be someone better until the Avengers came around and then you became a hero?”

She nodded again. “Yes.”

“And then Hydra came back to get you, but you were working with Daredevil – the Daredevil, the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen – so you unveiled their plan, but they ended up kidnapping you, tortured you again, killed your father, and then tried to kill you?”

“And they almost succeeded, too. I was clinically dead for thirty minutes, but I came back, so now I’m not dead.”

“Oh, my God.” If thoughts were visible, there would have been smoke coming out of Karen’s ears. “I’m so sorry, are you okay?”

“Daredevil saved my life,” Eliza said. “I know people say he’s dangerous, but-”

“I know he isn’t because he saved my life too.” Karen’s hand found hers. “You didn’t deserve any of the things they did to you,” she said, “and I’m so terribly sorry that I judged you by the lies the media spread about you. It wasn’t fair. Or judging you for your relationship with Matt when you are one of the most mature people I’ve ever met. You’ve been through so much and treating you like that wasn’t fair. I get it now. I’m so sorry.”

She squeezed her hand. “It’s okay, I’m better now.” She wasn’t, she was spiraling down and something wasn’t quite right with her head.

“So, uh,” Karen tried to regain her composure, “You said there is something I can help you with? Whatever it is, you can tell me.”

Could she?

“I need you to help me get away with something so Matt doesn’t find out,” she said, and the look she received was one of confusion. Eliza gnawed at her bottom lip. “It’s nothing bad, he’s just very overprotective and I need to be alone for a couple of hours.”

“To do what, exactly?”

“I need to meet an old friend. A friend I had when I was still an Avenger.”

Eliza could be extremely quick on her feet, especially when it came to telling lies. She scared herself at how easily the words came over her lips.

“And he can’t find that out because it’s a little dangerous in the legal sense,” she said, “and he wants to make sure I don’t go to jail, which I understand, but this is a short meeting I have to attend because I need answers on something no one else but that friend can give me.”

He wasn’t a friend, he was a foe, but Karen didn’t need to know that.

The explanation seemed to make her curious and maybe a little suspicious, but she had her fair share of secrets, so she gave in. “Tell him we’re going out tonight to bond,” she said.

“What, seriously?”

“We made a deal. We’re going to pretend that we’re spending time together while you go about your business and then tomorrow, we’ll go out so I can get laid. That was the deal, right?”

“Right,” she answered quickly, “You’re right, that was the deal. Thank you, Karen! I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“He’d probably find out and lock you in at home like Rapunzel in her tower.”

“That-” she laughed, “Okay, that’s true.”

“And I desperately need a wingman,” she said.

And for what Karen was willing to do for her, she deserved Eliza’s best performance at finding someone that would absolutely destroy her in the best ways possible.

Her plan was simple: Get a taxi to the SHIELD base, sneak in through the back, and have Maria Hill, the only person willing to help her always, disable the security so she could get in unnoticed. Once she was inside, she only had to stay away from the security cameras and find her way to the prison cells in the basement. For that, she needed security clearance, but she convinced Maria to give her the key that would give her access to every inch of the base. Then, she only had to outrun security, distract them or knock them out to reach her target that was locked away in one of the most secure cells in the entire compound. It was simple and sounded so easy, but the not getting caught part was the hardest one.

She had infiltrated many government facilities, but Nick Fury was smart and he had his ways. Thanks to Maria, she could get in unnoticed, but the rest was on her. And if Maria was asked, she would have to fold to keep her job, which would get her cover blown faster than she got in.

Viktor Volkov was a murderous asshole that ruined her life and took her childhood and her pride, but she was in control now and he was locked away with no opportunity to touch her. She was safe from him. She had the upper hand. He was an asshole and a pedophile but he was the only one who knew her ‘condition’ better than most. She grew up with him. He raised her, supervised the experiments, and used her in the ways he saw fit, which meant he knew the extent she could go to back then, and after figuring out what was really inside of her, he still knew more than she ever did. He was the only one who could help her and she would get her answers, come what may.

She made it as far as the lower level, the hallway she had to get through to reach the stairs that would make it easier to go lower. She triggered a sound distraction at the opposite end, causing the guards to split up and jog in the opposite direction. The red light of the security camera shut off and she thanked Maria for being such a good friend. She didn’t even have to explain, she just told her she had to speak with him and get some things straight and that Fury wasn’t to find out. She agreed to help. One hand washed the other. She owed her. This was treason, technically, going behind his back, and she risked a lot by helping her out. But when did Maria Hill ever care about being a rebel? She was born for it.

Eliza looked around the corner first. The hallway was clear. She looked to her left, taking a few steps back. She thought she ran back into the wall, but instead, she hit something a lot… softer.

She jumped around when she realized it was a body, hands at the ready to fight, but the red eyes looking down at her almost in pure disappointment made her scream.

“Jesus Fuck!” she held her heart. “You scared the crap out of me.” Taking a closer look, her face fell. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” she asked. Her voice sounded shrill and he flinched, purposely so.

Matt opened his mouth, surprised she even had to ask. “What am I- what are you doing here?” he shot back.

“I asked first.”

“I asked second.”

“I was just… visiting my friends,” Eliza said. “What’s your excuse, hm? You don't have any friends here."

He cocked his head. “You were just casually visiting your SHIELD friends in a secret government facility, in your suit, the one I had Melvin design for you?”

She shrugged. “I felt fancy.”

“The suit isn’t fancy, it’s practical. It’s meant for fighting. It's not meant to be paraded around, but you know that. The fact that you used it so you could break in-”

His lecturing tone made her roll her eyes. That he even got to judge. He broke in too, after all.

“I didn’t break in. I had a key.”

“Where the fuck did you get a key to this place?” His voice grew more and more agitated with every passing word from her end.

“Obviously not fucking eBay,” she deadpanned. “I got it from Maria, who just happens to be my friend.”

“Oh, so now Hill’s helping you break into her workplace, a secure government facility with a security presence higher than the Empire State?”

“So what if she did? You broke in too, you hypocrite!”

“Because I was following you,” he said.

“You were following me?” She was afraid of that. “You stalker!” Eliza screeched. “Can’t I just have one night to myself?” Her face was starting to grow red and he didn’t look better.

The argument was useless. She was fucked anyway. He made her and now her mission was at risk. Matt wouldn’t let her proceed, not even when the Devil came out to play. He wanted to kill Viktor and he would do so still if he ever got the chance, but he also wouldn’t because he found back to faith and himself. It was a weird space in the in-between, and she hated it.

He sneered, “You can if you’re not getting yourself in danger. What did you tell me? You were going to have a girls' night with Karen?”

“Maybe I was.”

“No, you weren’t. I could tell she was lying the second she said she was leaving to meet you. Seriously, you got Karen into this? What did you tell her?”

“She’s my friend,” she argued, “and also, I told her everything. That’s why she helped me.”

He stared blankly behind the mask.

She huffed, biting her cheek guiltily, and dropped her shoulders. “I told her some things,” she corrected herself at his deadpan expression. “Doesn’t matter anyway. I needed her to stall so I could get in here because I knew you were going to try and stop me.”

“Damn right, I did! You are so reckless,” he snapped, “what is wrong with you?”

“From the top of my head, I’d say a lack of parental affection and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and crippling depression.”

“Would you mind taking this seriously?”

“Would you mind leaving me alone?”

She was being childish, she knew that but the fact he followed her to stop her did not sit right with her and she was beyond pissed off.

Matt chuckled. It was one of his dark chuckles, the one reserved for either roleplay in the bedroom or for all the nights he walked the streets of Hell’s Kitchen as Daredevil, the man without fear. It was the breathless chuckle that left most criminals shaking because he proved to them how much he enjoyed enforcing justice, how much he enjoyed beating them to a puddle so his city could be a better place. It was then that Eliza realized she had fucked up, and he wasn’t going to let this slide.

“Sweetheart, you better tell me what you’re doing here before I have to force you,” he said. His voice resembled a low growl, sounding like boots scraping over gravel.

She pouted, answering, “I was visiting my friends.”

“Stop bullshitting me!” He echoed through the hallway and she flinched.

“Jesus, Matt, stay quiet!”

“Tell me,” he demanded.

She couldn’t say no to the Devil, but oh did she want to, and he had pissed her off enough for the night. She loved him but this went too far. He had crossed clear boundaries and she wasn’t going to let this slide.

She opened her arms in exasperation. “What do you care?”

“What do I— I’m your boyfriend.”

“No,” Eliza replied sternly, “Right now you are Daredevil and he has no business being here or following me.”

“Okay, fine, I’ll take the mask off.” He did so, removing the cowl and staring at her intently. “There,” he said, “I’m Matt Murdock, your boyfriend. Now tell me what the fuck you’re doing here!”

“I don’t answer to you. You have no right to control me. I’m not your property.”

“I’m not treating you like property, I just care about you,” she was surprised at how soft he sounded all of a sudden, “and I really want to know what you were thinking so I can make sure you don’t get hurt.”

He heard the footsteps too late. The security guards came around the corner, guns at the ready, and the pair sighed in defeat. It was of no use fighting the SHIELD Agents tasked to protect the facility, especially not so deep down, and since the light on the cameras was blinking again, Fury knew exactly where they were and what they were doing.

They put their arms up and behind their heads.

She sighed. “Great,” her eyes rolled back, “You managed to trigger the fucking security alert, congratulations.”

“I did?” Matt retorted. “You were screaming bloody murder.”

“Well, now we’re getting arrested-” she hissed when one of the guards pushed against her back. “I took measures to make sure this doesn’t happen. You completely fucked with my plan.”

“Oh, sorry I was trying to protect my girlfriend from getting killed!”

She struggled to find words, “Who would kill me in here?”

“I don’t know.”

“Then why are we arguing?”

“I don’t know!”

"Honestly, the audacity you have sometimes-"

The security guards pushed them down the hall, into the elevator. They both stood trapped with the heavily armed men in the small space that slowly started to feel suffocating.

He turned his head to her. “Should we fight them?” he asked.

In response, a gun pressed into his lower back, as did hers.

“Nevermind.”

Eliza scowled at him. "You are so not getting laid the next two weeks," she said.

"I can take good care of myself, thank you," he retorted. "I'm not the one who has trouble masturb-"

"Okay, would you stop? You are disturbing the security guards."

"You started talking about our sex life."

"Which will be non-existent for three weeks now," she grinned sourly at him, "Congratulations. Have fun with your hand- hey!" One of the guards dug his gun further into her hip. "Would you mind?" she asked.

He didn't even look at her.

"Unbelievable."

They were forced into a room somewhere on the first floor, and the door shut behind them as fast as it had opened. On each end of what seemed to be another conference room at the other side of the compound, a guard stood to protect the doors.

Eliza realized they weren’t there to prevent Matt from leaving because he had accepted his fate, they were there to make sure she didn’t make a run for it.

She paced the floor with angry steps, her fists balled at her sides, and she muttered curses under her breath that were anything but friendly.

Matt sighed. “Would you stop pacing?”

She glared at him. “No.”

“Eliza, please, just sit down. It’s of no use-”

“If these guys would do something other than standing around and being useless,” she said and stepped up to one of them, “I could get out of here, but I am once again held against my will, which would be terrifying if I couldn’t break his fucking neck if I wanted to right fucking now.”

The guard flinched back.

“Would you stop threatening the security guards?” he asked from behind her, at this point beyond tired of her shenanigans. “Sit down,” his demand was louder this time, “or I’ll pull you into my lap and make sure you stay there.”

“Take your shot.”

She should have known he would stay true to his promise. His arm slung around her waist and pulled her back into his chest. She struggled, but he had her pressed tightly to him, she couldn’t move. He wasn’t sitting however, he was holding her as he stood, and her heart calmed at the grounding stroke of his hand along her side.

He cooed into her ear, “I know you’re mad at me right now, but I only followed you because I was worried. Now, you can hate me all you want, but at least I got you in my arms again, safe and sound.”

His silver tongue be damned.

“Whatever brought you here, it’s okay, we can talk about it.”

“I don’t want to talk,” she said, “I just want answers.”

“Answers about what?” he asked.

“Myself.”

“What?”

The door opened and his grip on her eased. They turned to the man that entered, his black leather coat dangling dangerously close over the ground. Nick Fury stood in all his one-eyed glory, the look of disappointment causing his forehead to wrinkle, but then again he always looked like that. His arms were crossed behind his back, undoubtedly holding something he didn’t want them to see yet.

He eyed Matt first, then Eliza. His face fell even further. “I taught you better than that,” he said. “That was an awful break-in.”

She chuckled sourly. “Well, I was in a hurry,” she said.

“Still weak. And talking about your sex life while guns are pointed at your backs? What are you?" he cocked his head, "Twelve?"

“What do you want, Nick?”

“I’m curious as to what led you two fools here.”

“I had a mission, he was following me.”

Matt scoffed, “You make me sound like an asshole.”

“I love you, but right now you are,” she said.

“Whatever your marital dispute is,” Nick cut their bickering short by stating, “I’m glad you’re here.”

“Seriously?” Eliza said at the same time Matt said, “What?”

Their forehead wrinkled in confusion, unlike his look of disappointment, and she searched for answers in his face. He was expressionless as always. A goldfish displayed more emotions than him. He was hard to read, impossible even.

“Yeah, I was actually going to contact you, but your insufferably reckless ass somehow made it here without me having to waste valuable time to call you. And your puppy is somehow always on your ass, so it was kind of predictable he'd break in too, which he seemed to be better at than you," he said.

“You make it sound like I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“That’s because you don’t."

His arms came forward, the thick brown folder in his hand almost bursting with documents. He threw it on the table. It slid toward her, landing right in front of her. Eliza stared at the missing title, then back at Nick.

“What’s that?” she asked.

He slid the same file only with a Braille imprint toward Matt, who caught it with his palm. “Same question here,” he said.

“Well, Matthew, I'm sure you'd like to know that your girlfriend was planning on sneaking into our prison quarters and speaking to Viktor Volkov who is locked away pretty good in a special cell, but she knew that already,” Fury’s working eye switched to her, “Didn’t you?”

Matt’s eyelids fluttered wildly. “You were planning to do what?” at the end, his voice hitched an octave, and he looked almost angry. She didn’t answer, only staring down guiltily at the closed file. “Are you out of your goddamn mind? Eliza, what has gotten into you?”

“I wasn’t planning to kill him if that’s what you’re insinuating,” Eliza said, and in her defense, she really wasn’t. He could hear it in her heartbeat.

He scoffed, turning away. “Why?” he asked.

She glanced over at his sharp jawline, the way it twitched ever so lightly, an inner conflict displayed in his face. He didn’t understand and she couldn’t blame him. She really didn’t understand it either. She was supposed to find her answers elsewhere, not turn back to Viktor, but in her mind, it had been the right choice to make. It still was, in some way. She still wanted to ask him because damn her father, he wasn’t alive anymore and she was at a loss for answers.

“Does it matter?”

“Yes, it does.”

“No, it doesn’t,” said Nick, “because I have something for you that I need to talk about. I’m glad you’re both here ‘cause you’re going to need a lawyer for this one, Bennett.”

She frowned. “What did you do?” She didn’t trust him, especially not with strange files that were never opened before. There was still a seal on it.

Matt toyed with the paper. On his face, the same question was displayed.

“This is all the information we could pull from the White Room and what was left of Hydra. It includes government secrets and reports on the experiments conducted, new and old. The reports date back to twenty years ago, even before you came along. It’s filled with death certificates and profiles of each Hydra Agent that was responsible for Project Chaos, and the new variant they were trying to create. This file has all the evidence on what happened at the new facility,” he told them, “which makes this very valuable. The government would kiss my feet if they got this. But that’s not all. It has all the information on the men that hurt you, especially Viktor, Ivan, and that scientist Mueller. I compiled every last sliver of information in this file-”

Her jaw tightened. “What does it have to do with me?” she questioned.

“Because it’s also a record of everything you did in Hydra’s name.”

Shit.

“Now, I know this may seem like a lot, but I encourage you to take a look at it. There is a decision you have to make,” he said. “We either burn this thing or we get it to the FBI, including Viktor, and this thing goes to trial. You have to choose one of them.”

She had to choose? Eliza stared at the file, her eyes blank. She came in to talk to Viktor, not be overrun by Fury’s twisted idea of justice. She wasn’t prepared for it.

She flipped the file open. Her eyes skimmed over the secrets Hydra had collected over the years, many of those that could threaten governments all around the world. She recognized some of the secrets because she was the one who got them. The diplomat’s daughter that she killed, everyone dead around her, every last record of what she did, who she killed, it was all out there. Or, it was in the file, anyway. Every child that died at Mueller’s hand and Viktor’s command. The faces were partly familiar, partly strangers.

When it came to the records of what happened a month ago, she saw the outline for the new White Room, the records of the people kidnapped, the procedures that were done and killed so many more. The ones who got out were put into witness protection, it said in the file, and it made sense. She was listed as one of the kidnapped victims, and what they planned to do to her and her blood was briefly documented, but the record also stated that most of the documents were burned or shredded.

Ivan was pronounced dead and so was Anton, her father. Ivan’s murderer wasn’t mentioned; they blacked Natasha’s name out, thank God, because if the government found out, they would send an even bigger search party and prosecute Eliza for more than what was stated in the file.

Matt read the file at the same speed she did, but he picked up a little more than she did. The lawyer in him read the information she had told him long ago, but it still made him swallow. In a legal sense, this didn’t look good and if it got out - he didn’t want to think about it, and the fact Eliza seemed so deep in thought was unsettling.

“Angel,” he said, “You can’t let this happen. The pardon that was made-” he tried his best to glare at Nick, “It would mean nothing if this goes out. Why would you even suggest this?”

“Because the FBI and DODC can lock Viktor Volkov away for good and make sure he never sees the light of day again,” Nick said. "They can give him a proper trial and put him somewhere he won't come out again because the people in jail, most of them, at least, hate child molesters. He'd suffer far worse there than here. This is a five-star hotel in comparison and quite frankly, it's pissing me off."

“Well, this isn’t just about that asshole, although I would love nothing more than to see him suffer. Believe me, Fury, I get why you’d want him locked away somewhere that isn’t your basement, but this isn’t about you or Volkov,” he said. “This is about Eliza. She’s the only thing that matters here.”

“With all due respect, and I don’t often say that to just anyone, but it’s not just about her. This is about putting a criminal and enemy of the state behind bars that are not in a SHIELD facility but far, far away from here.”

“No,” Matt’s chuckle sounded dark, and his eyes matched his tone, “absolutely not. This is about her, you and I both know it. Don't put justice in front of her. She matters more than that."

Nick turned to Eliza, his head cocked to the side and his eye expectantly boring into her frame that seemed smaller than usual. “Bennett,” he said.

“Eliza,” said Matt.

She closed her eyes, rolling them behind closed lids.

“Sweetheart, please, you can’t consider this. From a legal perspective, this will screw up the freedom you just gained back. The statement of what happened at the facility, I— you broke the Accords more than once, sweetheart, and if the government got their hands on this, no one is going to show you mercy. And this is not your boyfriend speaking, this is your lawyer who is cautioning you against this. As your boyfriend, I can’t lose you, but as your lawyer, putting you in jail by releasing this would be completely counter-productive because your imprisonment would be entirely different from a normal inmate, and right now your lawyer’s words are what matters the most. Even Foggy would tell you the same thing.”

Her thoughts raced. His words met her ears, but they floated in her brain like weightless clouds, speaking a foreign language she never learned. She wasn’t sure what to say, think or do. All of the information that her eyes picked up was messy and she knew how risky it was to consider it. She agreed with Matt that it would get her locked away faster than she could say she was innocent, but the part of her that craved to see Viktor suffer found Nick’s offer alluring. She considered it and she hated that she did.

She looked up eventually. “I want to see him,” she stated.

“Absolutely not,” Matt jumped in once again. He didn’t mean to sound controlling, but it seemed Eliza was being controlled by a force she couldn’t see, a cruel little monster that told her exactly the opposite of what was the right thing to do. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. We should sit down and think about this,” he said.

“I want to see him,” she said. Her voice played one note. “Let me see him.”

Nick shared a look with the two guards. “If that’s what you really want—“

“Fury, with all due respect, you can’t do this.” Matt was determined to stop this before it could get worse. “You can’t let her talk to him.”

Her eyes were dead when she turned to him and said, “It’s my choice to make, not yours.”

He feared she might slip away from him again.

“I need to see him, and I’m going to do so with or without your support. Now, are you gonna stand in my way, Matthew, or are you going to put your role as my boyfriend aside to support me in my decision to paint my own picture before I sell myself out to the FBI?”

Viktor always put her in a terrifying mindset, but the more he listened to her erratic heartbeat, the more he realized she couldn’t be swayed, and she was just as scared as him, although her moral conflict prevented her from showing how badly it hurt.

His question, “Can we listen in?” was answered quickly by a nod from Nick.

“We’ve got surveillance everywhere,” he said, then nodded to the guards. “If that’s all, take her to him.”

Matt caught her arm. "Hey," he said, and his voice and eyes had softened visibly, "I didn't mean any of what I said earlier. I'm here for you, always, no matter what."

She smiled, "I know."

"I know you have to do this and it's your right, but... be careful, okay?"

"Okay," she said.

Eliza thought she would never see him again. She didn’t want to see him. She hated him. She loathed him with her entire being, but sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do to get results.

It reminded her of the time she went to visit Mueller, but this time, she didn’t have to sign a waiver or talk to his lawyers. She could talk to him and there was nothing he could do about it because he was trapped behind glass. She had never felt so powerful as she did when she finally stood in front of him.

She chuckled. “I was looking forward to this.”

Viktor sat on the bench of his cell. At the sound of the door opening, he had looked up. His eyes sparked curiosity, but he didn’t get up, not even when she stood right in front of the glass where the red border was drawn on the ground. Don’t cross, it said.

“Not particularly this,” she said, “but seeing you locked in a cage while I’m out here, free of the chains you bound me with when I was a kid. How does it feel to be the ant instead of the boot?”

He rose to his feet, finally, and approached the glass.

“Does it feel humiliating? Does it make you feel smaller than you are like you have no rights and are merely existing for the purpose of someone else?”

“Oh, I’m so glad to see you again,” he purred. His voice had gotten deeper and his hair had grown out. With the white suit on he was right where she had once been and the fact he was chained to the ground meant she really made it out and now it was his turn to suffer. “How have you been, malyshka?”

“Don’t deflect.”

“I heard what happened with Ivan. I knew you’d survive, of course. You always do.”

She eyed his face. The scars of what she did to him were still visible. “I survived because you were not my only reason for living,” she said. “I survived because I deserve it, you don’t. The truth is, I should have killed you when I got the chance, but I learned that I am better than the killer you made me out to be. I’m not defined by what you did to me, so I’m glad I didn’t kill you so you can see me thrive now and watch yourself lose over and over again when you look into my eyes and see yourself trapped in a cell, not me.”

He chuckled. “Attitude,” he said, “You’ve always had that. Feisty you were, especially as a child. But this undying hope that you have… I never taught you that.”

“Yeah, you told me hope was for the weak and that a good girl doesn’t hope, she only obeys. That kind of sucked, by the way.”

“What brings you here?” he deflected once again. “Did you miss me?”

“You disgust me,” she spat.

“Now, why are you being so vulgar? I didn��t do anything to you. I just showed you who you really are, but you didn’t want to see it, did you? You still don’t want to see. You’re blind, malyshka. You want to be blind because you know what you’re going to see is so much worse than who you pretend to be. If anything, you owe me.”

“I owe you?” She laughed. It was hilarious. He still spoke as if he had any control over her, but she knew better. Finally, she knew better.

A month ago, she would have struggled with not believing him, but now she knew that he was merely trying to turn her into the monster he wanted her to be. He didn’t own her and she didn’t owe him, especially not after what he did to her.

She could fight back and she would because she had to, not only for herself but for all the innocent children he hurt, for all the girlhoods he took and the innocence he stole from her. She had to fight for the death and destruction he caused and the families that suffered at his hand. And she had to fight for her future to be free of his memory. He didn’t deserve the kind of power he had over her, and she was finally done falling for him.

She stepped forward, barely breeching the tape. “I owe you shit,” she said. “I followed your command for so long, listened to all the lies you told me, and I let you shape me the way you wanted to. You manipulated me to the point I started to believe that I was as worthless as you said and that I only lived for Hydra. You made me feel so small,” Eliza shivered, the tears clogging her throat, but she pushed through them, “You made me feel like a toy and while I might have loved it back then, I realize now that you made me dependent on you simply because you thrived off of taking the power and innocence from little girls. You think I owe you because I was the only one who survived your torture? That I owe you for the mercy you showed me when I disobeyed you back then? You really think that?”

His eyes darkened. The monster was about to come out, and she realized that she had seen the same darkness in herself, but she wasn’t a monster. He made her believe she was born to be a monster, but that wasn’t true. The way she viewed herself was heavily influenced by what he taught her and it was time she broke that cycle. She had to take back the power she lost.

“Newsflash, Viktor, I no longer live for you. I don’t live for anyone but myself. So you can take your manipulation and shove it so far up your ass, it comes back out of your mouth, and then you will choke on it because you don’t deserve the air you breathe. You don’t deserve anything but what’s coming for you. You think washing your hands is going to make what you did go away? It won’t,” she told him, “and you know why? Because I am going to show everyone the blood on your hands and I am going to make you suffer for what you did. Now that I’m grown, I’m scared of ghosts. Every last memory of you is burned into my brain and I keep thinking about what I did wrong. But it wasn’t my fault,” Eliza said, “and I get that now. I used to be weak, I used to be smaller than you and afraid to hit you back because I was scared of punishment. I used to pray for the day I got bigger than you, but I was too caught up in your game to grow up. But I am grown now and I understand that what you showed me wasn’t love. This ends with me. Now I live for the thrill of hitting you exactly where it hurts you the most, and that started with tearing down Hydra, and it’s going to continue by putting your files out there and getting every last government organization involved in getting you somewhere far, far away from here where no one can ever get hurt again. I’m taking back my girlhood, Viktor. I’m taking back the power you stole from me and you are so going to burn for all that you ever did in your miserable life.”

He bared his teeth, suddenly so close to the glass. “You think I’m scared of a little girl?” he asked.

“Look at me. Do I look like a little girl to you?”

“You say you’re big enough to hit me back, but you’re hiding behind a facade. Deep down, you’re still a scared little girl and nothing that you do is going to break me. If anything, if you publish those files, I am going to break you–“

“No, you don’t get to break me. You don’t get to do that. I won’t give you the satisfaction.”

“Oh, malyshka,” his words spat venom and she swallowed it up at the first glance, “This is not up to you. You think you’re in control, but I’ll always be in your head. I’ll always be in control of you. I made sure of that.”

Eliza clenched her jaw. “Is that why I’ve been seeing strange things, huh?” she said. “What kind of mind games did you play with me? Why does it feel like my head is being split in two every damn night? Was that you because if it was, I want to know just what you did so I can reverse this madness!”

“I didn’t do anything. And even if I did, there’s nothing I can do about it now. The real power is in your blood. The truth is up to you and God now. Maybe you should ask your father- oh, wait,” he smirked, “He’s dead.”

Her hand collided with the glass. His laughter rang out and it only got louder. She needed him to stop. The sound was all too familiar. It was terrifying and it hurt deep within her chest. It tore her skin off her bones and threw it into a smoldering pit of fire. He pulled at her heart and took her soul with his laugh, he toyed with her and broke her mind with every word he spoke.

He didn’t get to have control over her anymore, but the anger did and he knew how to play with her anger. Oh, how he knew how to play with her anger. He was a master manipulator, after all.

When her hand hit the glass, it shook, and the guards behind her broke their motionless stance to storm after her. She broke the barrier right through, standing right in front of where he was locked away, and the sound of her palm against the cage vibrated in the large room.

“Take his name out of your mouth!” she hissed. “Answer me! What is wrong with me? What do you know, huh? Tell me!” One of the guards grabbed her arm, but she shoved him away. “No, I need to know. I need to know what you know, Viktor. You don’t have anywhere to run, so you gotta tell me before I get in there and fucking rip your throat out, you useless fuck!”

He only laughed harder. He was making fun of her. Viktor got off on how desperate she was, the fury in her eyes and the fire in her bones. He thrived off of seeing her struggle like a fish out of water, and it only made her angrier.

The arms of the other guard wrapped around her and pulled her back behind the tape. She shrugged him off but remained where he had forced her to stand. “If you know anything, I’m gonna find it out. You don’t get to destroy who I am,” she said, “and I’m no longer scared of you. Do what you want, I’m done. I’m going to dedicate my life to ruining you, and you have to watch as I burn everything in your way to set you on fire, too.”

Eliza glanced at the security camera where she suspected Nick and Matt were watching her, and she exhaled a heavy breath, one that was as determined as she was. “Publish the file,” she said loud enough for the speakers to pick up.

She turned to the exit, ready to make a run and punch the first wall she could find, but then his voice rang out again and it made her blood run cold.

“The real enemy here is you,” he said. “There’s a reason you’ve been having those dreams, and if the world ended, it was probably your fault. Destroyer of Worlds.”

The words were in Russian, but she understood. “What did you just call me?”

Viktor only laughed again.

“What did you just call me?”

“You’re going to destroy yourself before you destroy me,” he stated, unrelated to her question, and he settled back down on the bench. “I’ll be here waiting for you to join me in jail.”

She looked at him again. She wasn’t going to join him anywhere. He could try as hard as he wanted, but she wouldn’t listen. She refused to cave.

“They can try to lock me away, but I would rather kill myself than be anyone’s captive ever again, and trust me, I will. Wouldn’t be the first time.”

“But did you ever succeed?”

“Trust me, if I get prosecuted for what you did, I won’t hesitate to pull you down with me. That’s not a warning, Viktor, it’s a promise. You’re done here. You’ve lost. I’m taking the power and control you took from me and I’m going to channel it into destroying you,” said Eliza, the door opening before her and revealing the brightly lit hallway behind it, “Whatever it fucking takes.”

#matt murdock #daredevil #foreigner's god #matt murdock angst #matt murdock x ofc #matt murdock fic #matt murdock x female!oc #daredevil fic #matt murdock fluff #matt murdock x oc #karen page #foggy nelson #marvel #mcu

1 note · View note

delicatelystrangepolice · 3 months

Text

So I finally deleted Exquisite Hearts from the internet

I have been thinking about it since before I even posted it. A completely weird thing for me to do because I felt like I had enough experience with writing and posting to know where I stand.

Exquisite Hearts took me on such an unpredictable journey that it took me half a year to realize the impact.

The writing process was nice. It was so nice I got a little too excited about it. It felt so special. I don't think anyone can realize how special that was. Not even myself.

It was the first thing I wrote creatively in a really long time. It was the thing that put this little hopeful spark in my mind: you can do this. See? You are doing it! I was so happy writing it that I didn't even realize I was invested in it to the point of neglecting my own mental health.

I lost an entire summer on it. The summer when I should have been relaxing and unwinding, not putting more stress on myself.

But the rational part of me slapped me in the face and screamed: You ARE relaxing! You are writing a stupid bullshit fanfic, it's not rocket science! There are literally no stakes in it! Nobody cares, you shouldn't either!

Well. I cared anyway.

The problem with this story wasn't the fact it was bad. I wrote much, much worse things in the past. Some of them are still all over the internet and they are so bad that I can't even get through them. Riddled with mistakes, terrible English, half-baked scenes, and zero original idea behind them. I still like them. It doesn't bother me it's out there. I can even get some comments here and there after years and think fondly of the times I was involved in them.

My idea of writing fanfiction comes from a very private, very sincere place. People write for fandom because they want to share. They want to share the love, the creativity, their fantasies, their writing. I still think it's a wholesome thing we can have here - this world of sharing just out of pure love. I don't want to change my view of fanfiction, because I like this aspect of it the most. I want art to be a thing of love. Not worrying about numbers or paychecks or recognition.

The problem for my personal journey with this story came when the two worlds crashed. On the one hand, I had this thing I loved so much - on the other the potential readers.

I posted it in a state of rush and let's say... desperation. When I started to write it I thought that the three months I had were more than enough to finish it. And it was an educated guess: I had nothing else going on, I knew my writing skills, I knew what I wanted this story to be. It went pretty smoothly from there.

What I didn't know was the fact how terrible I would feel about it.

I had six months to think about the whole fiasco and I still have no idea what went wrong.

For those last couple of months, I was trying to talk myself into a more positive attitude: just get back to work, you'll feel better about this whole thing. It's just a story. It's a good enough story. You just wrote a thing, and look, you even made something out of it! You got a wonderful writer talking to you, encouraging you even - isn't that worth something? Just leave it be, you will feel better about it when the right time comes.

Somehow, it never came. Every time I went to ao3 and saw it sitting there uselessly it bothered me. I didn't want to think I was too sensitive to cope with such bullshit (because WHY?? Why would I even be bothered by it??) but the fact remained. I hated it the most of all my stories and I thought - this story does not deserve this much hate. It's your little hopeful baby. Nobody cares about it like you do. Just get over it.

I wrote some things in the meantime. Just to feel happy about it again. I didn't.

I even beta-read some stories for another author because I thought - well, you obviously can't write for shit but maybe you could be useful for something. And my use of 'beta-reading' here may be a little out of proportion - I just went there, trying to feel brave and give someone something I needed with Exquisite Hearts myself: a little help, a little encouragement, and a little love.

(Despite my agony and stress over other things, I hope at least that one went well. She wrote her stories and I hope she still loves them.)

The first mistake I made writing Exquisite Hearts was to think I wanted to post it. I didn’t want to believe it was a mistake for a long time. But it was. And if it takes deleting it to undo it, so be it.

When September came I already knew: I wouldn’t be writing for a long time after that. For the next couple of months, I was trying to bullshit myself into thinking that maybe I just wasn’t in the right mindset, maybe I was just being dramatic, maybe it didn’t have to be this miserable. Nothing changed. And believe me, I tried.

I know nobody can help me with that. This thing? Is me trying to help myself.

#I don't want to share things here anymore #but I will share this #it's where it belongs #told you I was going to be happier in February

1 note · View note

moeshajadaanne · 1 year

Text

Tumblr Shorts!!

A new series, where EVERYDAY I'll post a little writing that I'm working on;)

....

I arch into his chest, suddenly desperate for his touch. I couldn’t suppress the shudder than ran through me.

I didn’t want to.

The way he makes me feel. The way he worries over me. When I feel him staring at me and he thinks I don't see him. The soft smiles. The electricity I somehow feel whenever he’s near. A pleasurable pain I don’t think I could ever live without.

God I love him.

I whimper in shock.

What?

I barely feel his lips teasing my neck, vaguely i realize he’s giving me a hickey. But this time I don't even feel smug about his possessiveness over me.

All I feel is fear.

Bone crushing, what-the-hell-am-I-doing fear. The type of fear that slaps you around the face and cusses you out.

I've been through this before, this type of love, it's so passionate you're trapped in a bubble.

That love almost left me for dead. And already this love. His love. Is more potent, more all consuming than I ever thought a person could feel for another person.

Question: why am I not running for the hills now?

Why am I not disengaging from his safe arms and high tailing it like my inner voice is screaming at me to do.

Why don't I have that self-preservation instinct that kicks in.

“Hey” he says softly. I refocus on him, coming back to myself. Shaking off my thoughts.

“Where did you just go?” He frames my face gently, his eyes are soft, like he already knows what I'm thinking about, he just wants me to share it with him.

I shake my head hard, trying to shake off the dark cloud overcast and slowly succeeding. “You don't want to know.” I whisper, trying to get back to the mood.

He pulls my head up to meet his eyes, the ever soft brown ones stare back at me. “Try me. I don’t scare easy."

0 notes

waka-chan-out · 3 years

Note

Okay so I heard you were looking for requests for short stuff so do you have any headcanons for getting just. Absolutely railed by Haikyuu team captains, please and thank you. (I really love your stuff and I hope you take this!)

Rough Captain Headcanons

sub captains edition here.

you heard correctly!! (though this did not end up being very short lmaoo) i am a whore for the haikyuu captains so you’ve come to the right place. and thank you so much! i’ll take any opportunity to talk about my boys.

i included literally every single captain i could think of, including the karasuno captains after daichi and our timeskip kings. have fun.

post-timeskip, obviously.

content warnings: mostly gn! reader (but occasional fem!), lots of pet names, lots of teasing and degradation, hair pulling, spanking, three (3) creampies god i hate that word, hickies, handcuffs, etc. all of these are established relationship.

so i don’t know how to describe what exactly these headcanons are? i don’t think all of the captains are the “railing” type. however, these are basically just headcanons for when they go their hardest and either accidentally or purposefully get carried away.

Sawamura Daichi

likes to cage you under him and just lose it. will loop an arm around your waist and lift you up into him, so your back arches and he can hit the perfect angle.

will. not. let you look away. grabs your chin. pulls your hair. will move you however he needs to so he can look you in the eyes while he’s pounding into you.

“Shy now, princess?” Daichi said, tipping your chin to look at him. “Don’t hide. You look so pretty like this.” A sharp breath left your lips as he pressed his hips farther forward, grinding into you and sending a shock of pleasure through your body. “That’s it, sweetheart. Taking it so well. Let me give you what you deserve.”

Ennoshita Chikara

he’s a hair puller. like he doesn’t think much about it but he really likes pulling you by your hair back against his chest so he can whisper dirty shit in your ear. sometimes he gets a little too aggressive with it, so if you’re into that kind of thing, he’s your man.

possessive as all hell. you’re going out for drinks with coworkers? he’s leaving a hickie right at the collar of your top so everyone can see that you’re taken. coming out to dinner with his old teammates? he’s going to have an arm on you all night. loves to pull you in and remind you of things you did the night before to get you flustered.

very particular about how you’re positioned. will pin your arms above your head and readjust his grip several times. pushes your legs out of the way. grabs your jaw and moves your face where he wants you. somehow he doesn’t realize how hot that is until you tell him to his face. he’s still confused about it but has learned to love that you love it.

Chikara ran a hand up your side and let it rest in your hair for a moment before tugging hard. You gasped as he pulled it back and to the side, exposing your neck so he could leave marks as he pushed deeper inside you. You let out a whimper and tried to loop an arm around his neck but he grabbed your wrist and pinned it down.

“Patience, love. I want everyone to be able to tell I fucked you senseless.”

Yamaguchi Tadashi

he tries to dirty talk, but it always turns into praise and repeating how much he loves you.

aggressive and whiny, begging for more even though he’s the one giving it to you.

prefers when you ride him, but will do anything you ask of him. loves being told what to do. thinks you directing him to go faster or slower or a little to the left is the sexiest thing on the planet. he will fuck the life out of you if you just ask nicely.

“Harder, Tadashi,” you gasped. He grunted and snapped his hips as fast and as hard as it seems his body would let him.

“God, you’re gonna make me come. How do you feel so fucking good?” You smiled at the praise and pulled him in for a kiss. His breath hissed against your face as he continued pushing into you. You wrapped your legs tight around him and he let out a whine, pressing his face against yours. “I’m so fucking glad you’re mine.”

Oikawa Tooru

he’s a biter

likes to be lazy and dirty talks while you ride him usually, but every so often he shifts and will fuck you until tears are running out of your eyes.

will lay on top of you while you’re on your stomach, an arm looped around your neck, and just fuck you into the bedsheets. he’s wrapped up in his own little world, choking on high pitched moans and gasping for breath. like i said, he’s a biter, so you end up with marks all over your neck and shoulders. he’s just a fucking baby. the sounds he makes are so whiny and breathy it sounds like he’s the one getting destroyed instead of you.

“Ngh, fuck,” Tooru gasped. His breath was hot in your ear as you panted into the mattress. “Feel so good around me. You’re just begging for my cum, aren’t you?” You wanted to laugh and tell him you weren’t the one begging, but you couldn’t. Your breath was being torn from your lungs with every thrust. Tooru sunk his teeth into your shoulder as he pounded into you harder, letting out a soft whimper against your skin. His voice raised in pitch until he was practically whining. “Hah—gonna come soon. You feel so good.” His voice trailed off as it reached a whimper and he buried his face back against your neck, body shaking in anticipation.

Kuroo Tetsuro

spanking spanking spanking

seriously, hits it from the back and is not nice about it.

kuroo likes pulling you closer by your hips or ankles, turning you over whenever he feels like it, whatever. he just likes being able to toss you around and position you so he hits you just right every time.

“What? Trying to get away? That’s not how you take it, is it?” Kuroo grabbed your hips and yanked you flush against him. You cried out and buried your face against the bed. “There we go.” He laid a slap on your ass and laughed at the small sound you let out. “I’m not done with you yet. You’re not going anywhere.”

Bokuto Koutarou

he fucks himself dumb. accidentally goes so hard he’s whining and can barely hear you if you ask him to speed up or slow down.

likes missionary because he likes being as close to you as humanly possible and it gives him the best leverage to just.....lose it. gasping against your face and babbling about how good you feel. going off of that, he has a very hard time pulling out. lord have mercy. use a condom or get on a reliable birth control because as much as he tries, he’s never going to have any self-control in the moment.

he forgets just how strong he is sometimes, which results in bruises and weak limbs and occasionally trouble walking. he always apologizes profusely and offers many kisses to make up for it even after you insist that you’re fine.

“Baby, please let me come inside you. Please. Oh my god,” Koutarou whined, tightening his grip on your thigh and snapping his hips harder.

“Yes, Kou. Please.” You brought him down into a kiss. You were both panting and Koutarou was moaning, practically vibrating against you as he got closer. He began moving erratically, pounding harder into you and making you cry out.

“M’sorry. Fuck. I’m gonna come.” His chest heaved as he thrust into you hard once, twice, and let out a long groan. You could feel him twitching inside you, hands clutching your skin so hard it was almost painful. He mumbled praise and curses and nonsense against your lips, slowing his movement until he collapsed on top of you. He pressed a sloppy kiss to your forehead and tucked his face into your neck. “Thank you. I love you. Oh my god.”

Futakuchi Kenji

likes holding your legs and moving them around to see what gets the biggest reaction from you. doesn’t care what position you’re in but loves when your legs are closed and lifted so you’re extra tight around him.

his goal is to see you as desperate as possible. he’ll do whatever it takes to get your eyes rolling back, your hands clutching at anything they can grab, mindless pleading, all of it. he just wants to watch you fall apart because of him, and i gotta say, he’s good at getting his way.

“Oh, that’s it. Look at you,” Kenji cooed. He gently wiped a tear from your face as he readjusted your legs with his other hand, holding them tightly to his chest. “Coming apart already. I’m just getting started. Are you going to be good for me?”

Daishou Suguru

finger sucking finger sucking finger sucking. loves watching you gag so he’ll shove two fingers deep into your mouth and strokes them over your tongue. he also just does it to shut you up whenever he feels like it.

likes edging and teasing a little too much. will hold off from fucking you until you’re genuinely angry at him, so wet that he can push in with no resistance. then he makes it up to you by fucking you until you’re sobbing or your eyes are rolling back in your head. you’ve never had an orgasm with him that didn’t feel like you might not live to see the end of it.

“You like that, don’t you?” Suguru said, thumbing over your bottom lip as his cock slid between your legs, not pushing in like you desperately wanted him to. “Like when I use you like this? Should I just come like this? I don’t even have to fuck you to get myself off.” You let out a pathetic noise in protest and he laughed. “Maybe another time. Today I’ll be nice and give you my cock.” He dragged between your legs again and stopped at your entrance, slowly sinking in and pulling a relieved sigh from your throat. “There we go. That’s my fuckin’ girl.” He slid two long fingers between your lips, pressing on the back of your tongue and nearly making you gag. “Now stay quiet while I use you.”

Terushima Yuuji

i.......i gotta mention the tongue piercing. i’m sorry. i know he gives the most enthusiastic, sloppiest head and FOR SURE owns a vibrating tongue ring. what a whore. i love him.

i feel like he’s messy. like he’s into spitting and really sloppy kissing and cum play and everything. will come in your mouth and tell you to hold it there while he fucks you stupid. sometimes kisses it out of your mouth. he’s a freak and i like it.

“Yuuji, fuck.” You could practically hear your body vibrating, past orgasms still lingering under your skin.

“Yeah? Tell me where you want me to come,” he said. You groaned as he abused the perfect angle inside of you and smirked down at your strained expression. “Not gonna talk to me?” You stayed silent as your head tipped back against your pillow. He chuckled and grabbed your face. “Open.” You blinked up at him and did as you were told, sticking out your tongue. He leaned forward and spat into your mouth. “I’m gonna come inside of you. Yeah? That what you want?” You nodded and swallowed, eyes pinched shut and voice frozen in your throat. He laughed and snapped his hips harder. “That’s right. Anything for you, princess.”

Ushijima Wakatoshi

so we’ve all agreed: horse cock ushijima, however, he usually uses those powers for good. very gentle, very eager to please, exactly what you’d want in a man.

he’s not a hard dom, but sometimes he gets so overwhelmed with how much he loves you that he forgets how strong he is. pounding into you with his whole heart and whispering in your ear how much he adores you between groans. very vocal. a little too rough. definitely feels very guilty when you’re sore the next day but if you kiss him and tell him you liked it....he may be willing to throw caution to the wind again sometime.

Wakatoshi didn’t speak much, but the room was far from silent. He made the prettiest sounds when he was lost in you, grunts turning to long moans, made even sweeter when they were hummed against your lips. The groan of the bed mixed with the strike of skin against skin, white noise behind your already muddled thoughts. Wakatoshi pushed your legs farther toward your chest and leaned down, laying his face right against your ear.

“You’re so beautiful.” His voice seemed to rumble through your entire body. “You’re so good to me, darling. I love you.”

Kita Shinsuke

very soft. y’all are never gonna catch me writing hard dom kita shinsuke. HOWEVER. he is so eager that sometimes it’s a little too much for either of you. like he doesn’t realize how aggressive he’s been until you’re both literally unable to catch your breath and have to just lay in silence for a while. will ask you very nicely if you’re okay and get you water and anything else you need, but he will have this little grin on his face the whole time because he’s so happy to be able to put you both in that state.

Kita’s face scrunched up into a tight wince as he came, as his hips slowing into hard, deep thrusts that made your vision go white. Your grip in his hair was so tight you were sure it hurt, but you couldn’t help it when he was scrambling your brain with every touch. He stopped moving and you realized just how hard both of you were breathing. It felt like you couldn’t fill your lungs, body so spent that it couldn’t even do what it needed to do to survive. His braced arms on either side of your head were shaking, and his eyes were still shut tight.

“Shin,” you said, as steadily as you could through your gasping breaths. He didn’t answer. “Shin, baby, you okay?”

He exhaled hard and smiled, then let himself fall on top of you.

“Perfect. I’m—you’re perfect. I love you.” You laughed and combed your fingers through his hair, then pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“I love you too.”

Meian Shūgo

what to say about this man......

i feel like my opinions about what he likes and doesn’t like are kind of hot takes, because most of the stuff i see with him is hard dom. but. i raise you: overly excited switch meian shūgo.

captain meian shūgo likes to be teased and edged within an inch of his sanity. he likes when you talk shit and order him around and he’s DEFINITELY into handcuffs. however, he always pays you back for it. even if he’s still cuffed up and a little pink in the face from embarrassment, he will absolutely use you. very loud. loves when you leave scratch marks. loves leaving hickies everywhere.

You were almost shocked by the high moan that left Shūgo’s throat as he finally sunk into you. His face screwed up in pleasure and concentration as he withdrew his hips and drove them back against you.

“Fuck, I’ve been waiting for this. You tease me all that time but you can’t wait for me to fuck you like this, can you?”

“That’s some tough talk for someone whose wrists are still bound,” you said through a smile. He let out a breathy laugh and braced his hands on your stomach, still connected by leather and a short chain.

“Doesn’t keep me away from you.” He raised an eyebrow and pushed deeper inside you. “I can still use your body when I’m all tied up.”

Hirugami Fukurō

pulling a headcanon from his brother’s list and saying he likes getting his hair pulled, which means he loooooves going down on you.

will leave your legs feeling like jelly because he makes you come at least three times, and each one is hard. like, you forget where you are and can’t breathe for a few minutes afterward.

will cock warm you until you’re begging him to please, please move. proceeds to fuck you slowly, but so hard and so deep you’re feeling him between your legs the entire next day.

“Done already? That’s no fun,” Fukuro teased. You were still shaking from the last time he had pushed you over and he wasn’t helping the situation, thumb still circling your clit after already abusing it with his tongue.

“Come on. You know how to take me.” He continued easing his cock into you, dragging out all of the breath remaining in your body.

“Please,” you whispered. He smiled and leaned closer.

“Please what, love? Do you want me to stop? Use your words.”

“No.”

“Then tell me what you want.”

“Want you to—“ You gasped. “—fuck me. Please.” Fukuro grinned and positioned himself so he had more leverage over you.

“Good girl.”

2K notes · View notes