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popculturebuffet · 1 year

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Monthly Mupppets Madness: Seasame Street Presents: Follow That Bird Review!: A Film that Will DestroY you In A Good Way ( Brought To You By Emma Fici)

For Carroll

Hello all you happy muppets nad welcome back to Monthly Muppet Madness. Today's review is brought to you by the letters W and B as I finally got told how to get to Seasame Street! Yes after touching on them in Muppet Family Christmas it's time to give Kermit's other family a proper look with their feature debut FOLLOW. THAT. BIRD. This one.. has been delayed a bit, but we're finally here.

It also.. puts me out of my element as i'm way more familiar with the muppets as a troupe than I am with their public education forebearers, having only watched some as a kid too young to remember any of it (I scarely remember having a tickle me elmo), and as an adult watching his nicce and nephew, where it was very diffrent. I know the muppet side fine, but knew none of the adult performers as they were all gone by the time I was growing up and certainly by the time my niece and nephew came in.

For a brief history Seasame Street was created by producer Joan Ganz Cooney and LLoyd Morrisett , VP of the Carnigie Foundation, both things i only learned when looking this up on wikipedia but both vital. With crticism of tv at a high, the two decided to weaponize it's addictive qualities for good, to create educational programming to help kids in poorer areas who may not have access to as quality education, as well as promote diversity. The result was Seasame Street. Jim Henson was asked aboard as his muppets were incredibly popular and Cooney knew what she had. Jim didn't want to do it at first as he was worried it'd make it seem like the muppets were just "for children", a fear that sadly came true as it made getting the muppet show out there harder.. but he relented. It was a good cause and they inteded to make the show alla ges: mainly to edcuate small chidlren but entertaning enough their parents and older siblings wouldn't change the channel.

It goes without saying Henson was key to the shows success, with many of his performers joining the cast and while he had to wittle down to just performing his characters as the muppet show took off it's clear he loved these characters too.

Seasame Street naturally became the monster hit it is today, big with kids, loved by the kids who grew up with it and well loved, parodied with affectoina nd generally important. It's so relevant that last year it even got a newer parody survivial street about a ragtag group of public education performers fighting for seasame street in the post apocalypse. And if your wondering if that'll be covered her eventaully

(can confirm)

When I don't know the in pile is pretty big over here. At any rate as for how follow that bird happened

(daffy hands)

I tried my best but from my usual first choices (wikipedia and the muppets wiki to at least start) to combing I couldn't find anything behind the scnenes on why this film was made. I found out what I could but I can't tell you why the film came to be.

What I can is that it wasn't a huge success in theaters. It got slammed right up against films such as back to the future and pee wee's big adventure, and thus got utterly destroyed, not helped by WB barely promoting it and mostly saying "EH WE GOT BIG BIRD".

Thankfully like Muppet's Christmas Carol after it, Home Video and in this case HBO gave it a second life, so many an 80's and 90's kid saw the film and loved it young and slightly older, and the film became a bit of a cult classic. Yet despite having seen many a film from the Jim Henson era of muppets until sitting down for this review i'd never seen this one. So with fresh eyes join me under the cut as you, me, the seasame street players, a misguided racist social service bird, two shady canadian sketch comedy actors, and more FOLLOW. THAT. BIRD!

This is More Soul Destroying Than I Expected:

This film taught me NEVER to underestimate a muppet production. See I thought , much like it's succesor, this would be a light film , a road picture about finding big bird. Which it is.. what I didn't expect.. was for it to do THIS to me.

For those of you less familiar Follow That Bird is about the fedral council of birds deciding that Big Bird cann't POSSIBLY be happy without other birds around, so they send Mrs. Finch to go take him from his happy found family and stick him with a bird family. Yes today's show is brought to you by Bird Racisim.

HIs family reluctantly lets him go as he's curious to have a bird family, and is too innocent to relaize the system's broken. I didn't expect a muppet film to be an indictment of social services and unittional racisim and shame on me for not thinking they could do it. THey do it well too: Miss FInch isn't INTENTIONALLY racist, she's just so set in her ways she genuinely CAN'T see why Big Bird would be happy where he is and dosen't put any real thought into his placement, putting him with the dim witted dodos. The Dodo's themselves aren't BAD people, they just don't know how to take care of big bird like their own childrne, lack his imagination. Even Big Bird can't understand writing a letter asking "Why am I not happy?"

The only bad thing they genuinely do intetionally.. is tell Big BIrd he should have a bird friend instead, which gets him to run away. And what makes all this more painful is that Big Bird.. is a kind kid. He writes the dodo's a thank you note and simply wants to go home and being only 6, yes really, he dosen't get that he can't just walk home, how dangerous that is, and how CPS will be right after him. Carrol Spinney does a masterful job conveying Big Bird's innocnece and pain throughout the picture and part of why it hits so hard is his earnestness. It makes me miss the guy that much more seeing just HOW brilliant he was in the role. THe heart the emotion, he's a true master at Muppetry.

The film DOES ballance the melancholy at the center well: while it's got a downbeat tone in a lot of it for obvious reasons, it ballances it with heart: Big Bird is warmly naive and befriends anyone he meets wehter it's some small children or you'd expect or of all people country music legend I know nothing about whatsoever Waylon Jennings. Why is it the Seasame Street Movie iis one of the weirder ones i've seen. It's Big Bird's genuine kindness and childish innocence that keep the film from getting too dark. For instance with said kids we go form him sadly reflecting on being alone to spending a day with the kids goofing off while their parents are trapped in the negative zone, I guess.

Also helping are the rest of the main cast. Naturally while Big Bird's the titular bird to follow , our heroes are going to follow him. They see a news report about his running away lead by Chevy Chase, with of course Kermit showing up in his original role as newsman, something that's werid to me. This was also Jim's last film performance as Kermit, and it seems fitting that kermit end his film career with some old friends.

So the Seasame Street crew splits up into teams: America's faviorite power couple in a biplane,the count riding solo in his bat mobile ah ah ah, Maria (the big sister style oft voice of reason on the team) unfortunatley gets saddled with Oscar who in natural oscar fashion keeps derailing the quest, and Gordon, his sister olivia, and Cookie monster all pile into a car with Linda, a local deaf librarian. ALl the human actors are pretty good but me and @jess-the-vampire got a good chuckle out of the fact that they still act like their on a show for small children with all the overacting that implies. Having seen seasame street I spotted the style ofa cting at once and it still works fine here it's just weirder to see it when the stakes are far higher. Linda is the easy stand out, a deaf actress who not only revolutionzed portryals of deaf people on tv with her apperances on seasame street but is damn funny and energetic the whole film and is easily the standout of the huaman performers. And of course capping them all off is Grover on his own as SUPER GROVER!

Along the way the gang gets into various hyjinks: Bert and Ernie go upside down and sing an upside down song while chasing Big BIrd north by northwest style, something we'll get into more when we get to their song.

We also get one of my faviorite set pieces as Oscar forces his party to go to the goruch cafe, with only Linda going inside (Telly and some other guy are also along) with him: we get sandra berhanrd as a waitress, the food you'd imagine from a place like this and then throw up from thinking that, and salad served by catapult.

Finally we have one of my faviorite runners, the fact that Cookie monster spends the entire movie SLOWLY eating Gordon's car. By the end it's barely back and he owes them

I was also suprised he ate something besides a cookie. Granted unlike others I didn't get my hackles up when he switched to veggies, I got why, but I assumed those were the only two things he ate.. and was delighed when emma pointed me to THIS PAGE ON THE MUPPET WIKI.

Yes folks it's a list of EVERYTHING cookie monster has ate. My faviorites include:

An Aretha Franklin Record The Most Snowballs Two Safes Telephone 1973 Ford F-250 Pickup Truck Nearly All of Seasame Street Brick Wall Filmstrip and Rosebud A Baskedt Faith Hill and Tim MCGraw's Kaledioscope Ernie's Ukelele Smoking Pipes A Guitar (And never drew a dime) Ernie's Frying Pan Autumn Leaves NPR Microphone Stephen Colbert's Peabody Award Emmy A Sneaker Wooden Toy House TV Guide Logo Mattresses A Rock Two Hot Dogs and a Donut Bust Stop Sign Paper Clip, Egg Timer, and Microwave Cords Jack Black's Xbox 360 Half of Ernie's PIllow Bicycle Dr. Zhivagho John Oliver's Tie

And just for the anti vegtable eating idiots: An apple, bannaa, carrot, grapes, watermellon, yam, two apples ah ah ah, asaparagus, raisins, cucumber spears, carrot sticks, more apples, even more apples, and more bananas.

I also had no idea he and Ernie used to be friends.. though I can see why it's also in past tense. Where was I? Oh yes, these antics help ballance the deep sadness of the main plot making things work: we see plenty of misery from poor big bird, but the wacky hyjinks ballance it just so.

Speaking of which in addition to the muppets, what good would a muppet film be without a hammy villian who can match the muppets. And this one picked two excellent canditates, two people I never thoguht i'd see in a muppet film and who had I known were in this would've watched it long before I started this series: Dave Thomas and Joe Flahrety as Sam and Sid Sleaze!

Yeah for most of you they'd be before your generation.. or mine even. But thanks to binging SCTV dvd's in college I know these two as sketch performers supreme and with the film shot in canada, they were perfect. The two perfeclty play the sleazes as over the top villians with Sam as the slightly smater one asnd Sid as the goofy idiot, and both hamming it up as they tended to anyway. Their bits tend to read as an SCTV sketch that ocasionally guest stars muppets, and that is not ab ad thing> The bit with them extording a nickle from a kid to let him off a ferris wheel kill me and the two's comedic timing is great, with dave in paticular getting to ham it up about money. The two are just fantastic, while also being nicely cruel when needed whent hey imprisoin a 6 year old for thier own finacial gain. The shot of joe crying druing the most heartbreaking scene of the film, which we'll ocne again get to shortly, is something i'll be using for some time

The two are just great and as an added bonus I assumed, being a big star at this point, John Candy wouldn't share a scene with his two co stars… and I was wrong as John's one cameo is arresting the two fo them and i'ts glorious. I would like to see the rest of the sctv cast such as rick moaranis, eugene levy and cathrine o hara show up in a muppets production if they haven't yet as this showed me just how great it could be, and while they never got their co stars success, Dave and Joe REALLY are on the level of the others and this film shows it. Their easily top tier muppet villians and only charles grodin or tim curry may surpass them. Thankfully the Sleazes don't kidnap big bird long as some kids call seasaame street, they call our various heroes and they come resuce him. I also love how adorable the climactic chase is. They managed to get Big Bird's cage open before the sleazes took off with him, but Big Bird bein ga children is reluctant to jump and takes some gentle coaxing to jump.

Naturally they return home and while Mrs. Finch finds them she finally realizes family is not your species or race.. but who you love and who loves you and agrees to back the hell off. It's a happy ending and a truly great film. The film deftly ballances comedy and melacholy to create something truly special, that's just sappy enough without going too far and really touches the heart. It also has a great soundtrack and has been tradition lately, let's break it down:

Musical Muppetry:

We oepn with the Grouch Anthem, a gloriously batshit way to open the film as Oscar stands in front of a flag pattons tyle and goes on and on about his grouchy creed while other grouches back him up. Did I see this coming? No. Did I love every second of it? You better you bet.

Ain't No Road Too Long is our Waylon Jennings number and I loved it too, a nice jolly road song. The kind you need in this kind of film in the vein of movin right along or on the open road.

One LIttle Star is truly heartbrekaing as Big Bird and Snuffy sing to each other in absentia, as does Olivia because apparently she did this a lot. If a small child and his weird friend who everyone assumed wasn't real for several years , and his surrogate aunt singing about how much they miss each other dosne't break your heart you do not have one and I do not know why your here.

Easy Goin Day is a fun number with Kermit playing with some other kids. Simple, nice, and a nice break from the overwhelming misery before OH NO MISS FINCH IS BACK.

Upside Down World is probably my faviorite number, burt and ernie just singing upside down in a plane… and Jim Henson and Frank Oz really WERE upside down for this one, and sang it upside down as a result. The dedication these men have to a good muppet stunt is amazing and I love them for it.

I'm So Blue comes very close though and if you thought One LIttle Star was heartbreaking, this is heart atomizing as poor Kermit sings painted blue in a cage while Joe Flarhety rightfully sobs. one of the saddest, most emotoinal numbers in any muppet film and only not THE most emotoinal because When Love is Gone exists. True poetry

Rankings:

The sountrack as you can see lands in a solid fourth place, just inching out the muppets take manhattan. It's good but it's not the best.

Movie wise it also lands in fourth beating out Muppet Treasure Island, as I feel the character work is stronger here, and given how hard it's been to crack the top spots that's high praise but this film more than earns it. If you haven't seen it yet it's on HBO Max and I highly recommend it and i'm happy to own it. Check it out as soon as you can.

Next Month: Emma takes a break and it's Kev's turna s we enter one of the muppets few purely for adults experiments as live from new york IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT with the land of gorch. Thanks for reading…. this has been a great year of content and I can't wait to see what year 2 of monthly muppets brings.

#seasame street #muppets #big bird #oscar the grouch #sctv #linda #grover #super grover #burt #ernie #burt x ernie #telly #kermit the frog #chevy chase #dave thomas #joe flaherty

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thelordofdarkreunion · 3 years

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Family Business II

A follow-up to “Family Business.” More family, more Scoundrel shenanigans. If you want to see anything in particular or have any requests, feel free to tell me! As usual, no one except Drake belongs to me.

“I bring peace through superior firepower.” -Thomas Drake

After introductions were made, the various Scoundrels mingled throughout the room, speaking with the families of the only two among their number that really had them. Many of them knew that Kirk had a family, somewhere, and that his upbringing was quite good, especially compared to most of theirs, but he never spoke of them, and they never asked. Shepard stood near his mother, who was currently shooting ‘we’ll talk later’ looks in his direction. They were deep in discussion with Kirk, apparently speaking of the various intricacies and differences between the Starfleet and the Alliance Navy.

Vir was next to his parents, talking politely with Cooper and Quill. Solo and Cain stood in the middle of the room, holding drinks and generally mingling, but not speaking to anyone. Solo did this out of habit; he really had no desire to speak with anyone, and in most of the parties he went to, talking with others was a good way to die quickly. Old habits. Cain looked completely at ease, not wishing to speak with anyone. He found tensions flared quickly with the people of these new galaxies when they asked about the Imperium of Man. Best not to upset anyone.

To the surprise of every person present, a group of Vir’s nieces and nephews had immediately gravitated to the Chief. One of them grabbed him by the hand and outright insisted he come with her. Currently, the massive armored form of the Master Chief was sitting next to a gaggle of children as they played some sort of game. The more talkative were babbling to him as he simply sat, almost unmoving, watching curiously. The children thought he was great. Here was an adult that actually listened to them! It also helped that he was wearing a very cool set of armor. Children were odd like that, thought the Chief to himself. He didn’t have much experience with them, but he’d heard stories.

Thomas Drake found himself face to face with Thomas Vir.

“Thomas. A pleasure to meet you.” He stuck out his hand. Vir took it.

“And you as well, Thomas. A good name, Thomas.” Pale skin met black leather. Vir looked up, puzzled. He half-held a slip of paper to the light, slid to him during the handshake. Before anyone else could notice, Drake moved forward. In a completely unobtrusive and natural movement, he lowered Thomas Vir’s hand into the shadows.

“Don’t speak. Look natural. Talk to whomever you wish after this, but still, act natural. I know you can. In several minutes, excuse yourself. Go to the bathroom, and if there isn’t anyone there, look at the note. If there is, go in a stall, wait for them to leave, I care not. After this, quietly and unobtrusively tell them the contents of that note, and make sure they keep it a secret.” Drake flashed a grin. Vir looked worried. He’d been a part of things like this for far too long, and wanted to put it behind forever. “Relax, Thomas. It’s a party.” Drake made a move to pull away. Vir stepped forward to block him.

“Why me?” he hissed.

“Because I trust you to know what you’re doing. You and your father are the only ones with the skills to do this and do it correctly. There’s more to us than meets the eye, Thomas.” With a wink and swirl of his coat, Drake disappeared into the talking throng.

Twenty-ish Minutes Later

“So. You’ve been stationed aboard my son’s ship?” asked Martha Vir. Admiral Vir himself stood nearby, ready to quell any arguments about to start. He’d learned from almost bloody experience that the Imperials did not initially get along well with the citizens of the other galaxies, and vice-versa. He tried not to think of the beginnings of Imperial propaganda he’d seen springing up on his homeworld, and the people who might accept it… But he knew his parents wouldn’t. They were better than that. And, from experience, so was Cain. The Commissar stood across from Adam and Martha, resplendent in his dress uniform and far too much gold lace.

“I have indeed,” replied Cain. Gloved hands covered a glass of some sort of alcohol. He had no idea what it was, but if he wasn’t put in these new galaxies to sample all their drinks, then what was he here for, Throne-dammit? “It is a fine ship.” He pursed his lips, considering for a moment. “Very new, a bit small compared to most of the battleships I’ve been on, but a wonderful ship nevertheless.”

“Small? It’s one of the biggest ships in the galaxy!” teased Martha Vir. “Tell me. What’s the largest in yours?”

“I am by no means a naval expert, so I wouldn’t really know,” offered Cain apologetically.

“Nonsense! Give me your best guess,” insisted the Vir matriarch.

“From what I have heard amongst the naval officers and Astartes personnel I’ve had the pleasure of serving alongside, I believe the largest would be the Gloriana-class battleships assigned to some of the Space Marine chapter fleets,” said Cain.

“How big are they?” asked Admiral Vir, his personal and professional curiosity piqued.

“Gloriana-class battleships are extremely rare… and are usually about twenty kilometers long.” The silence was deafening.

In another corner of the room, Thomas Vir spoke with his father. He had discreetly gone around the room and passed on Drake’s message. It had been simple, two lines of pencil scrawled on a tiny piece of paper.

Do not speak of Eris. Do not speak of Adam and Sunny.

Thomas was an intelligent man. He realized the tensions between these new galaxies, but only now did he understand their full extent. If Drake had sought to warn them already, even against members of his own group… well. That wasn’t good. The bigger question was: how did he know, and what was he going to do?

“What do we do, Dad?” asked Thomas Vir. His father considered for a moment, frowning.

“I’ve talked to all of these people your brother works with. Especially that one.” He pointed to Cooper, currently speaking with Quill in underhanded tones. “He’s fine. Special forces. Seems like a good enough person. But the one who gave you the message…” he trailed off. He sighed and closed his eyes as he remembered. “I met a man like that once. During the war.” Thomas kept quiet. His father rarely talked about his time serving in World War III. “We saw him around occasionally. He said he was a clerk. He wasn’t. It was too obvious. He never had the skills or temperament of one. But no one ever asked, because there was something about him… some core of sheer violence behind his eyes that everyone knew they probably wouldn’t be around long if they questioned him too much. Some sort of special forces. Or a spy. We never really knew. But him,” Vir’s father nodded over to Drake. “He’s like that. He’s dangerous.”

“What about everyone else?” asked Thomas, not wanting this opportunity to go to waste.

“The other two that scare me are him,” he pointed to Cain and the golden Aquilia on his cap, “For obvious reasons, and him,” he pointed to the massive armored bulk of the Master Chief, “For also obvious reasons.”

“So why are we letting them play with the kids?” muttered Thomas. Indeed, both the Master Chief and Thomas Drake were over in the open space to the side of the ballroom entertaining the children. Thomas Vir and his father watched with slight trepidation, and, in the other corner, Han Solo, with amusement.

“And then James said he’d go with me and then we did and it was awesome! And there was a big hill and we played king of the hill and I won but I still rolled down the hill because that was fun and have you ever done that?” asked one of Admiral Vir’s nephews, continuing his story. Master Chief regarded him with solemn eyes behind his golden visor.

“I have,” he said shortly. Although, not in the particular way the child was thinking. There was a lot more gunfire and explosions involved.

“Great! So then after that we went near the river and we-” The Chief tuned him out for a moment. It wasn’t to say that the children were boring, but he was just so miserable at this party. He had no idea what to say to the adults, and the children had already grabbed him to make him sit with them. There was some sort of paper decoration on the top of his head, put there by one of the children. He didn’t move to take it off. It would fall off, eventually, when he stood up. He had run through every conceivable situation he could think of that resulted in the room being attacked, and gone through each combat simulation in his head. Twice. He had gone through what might happen if one of the wait-staff was hostile. Or one of the family members. Or the children. He looked down at the small boy, still babbling to him about things he did last week and how the starship ride to this planet was so cool. So, probably not the children. He couldn’t help it though. He was built for combat, built for death. He had no idea what he was supposed to be doing here.

“Why do you wear gloves?” asked one of the children to Drake. Another, her cousin, older and much wiser, tried to sush her.

“You can’t just ask people why they wear what they wear!” she said to her cousin. Drake laughed. You could fool adults, you could fool super soldiers, you could fool demi-gods, but you couldn’t fool children. Somehow, they always knew. He knelt down to the youth and removed his gloves by the fingers; first the right, followed by the left. In the corner, Solo watched with fascination. Come to think of it, he’d never seen Drake without his ever-present black gloves. He’d never thought about it until now, but it was rather strange. Even when eating, Drake never took them off. Why?

The two children recoiled, the younger with a slight shriek at the sight of Drake’s ruined left hand. The third and fourth fingers, along with the flesh beneath, were horrifically burned. The right side of the hand, fore- and index finger along with the thumb, were normal, unmarred flesh, though a shrapnel scar ran down the edge of the thumb. The smaller child stared at the hand in horrified fascination, as one might look at a particularly dangerous animal in a zoo.

“Don’t stare,” said her cousin. Despite her warning, she, too, was sneaking peeks at the burns. Drake chuckled at them again.

“It’s alright,” he said. He took his right hand, scarred, but not horribly burned as his left was, and traced the edge of the burn marks. “I look at it, sometimes. It’s interesting. Like a science experiment. Here,” he beckoned the two closer. “It’s really interesting, actually. Look at the contrast between the burned side and the regular side.”

“What is… contrast?” asked the younger one, her mouth still trying to frame the unfamiliar word. Drake smiled again.

“Contrast means difference. You’re learning about burns, you’re learning about words. You must be smart. I can tell that.” The two children watched in fascination as Drake told them about burns, what they did to the skin, and how to treat them.

In the corners, Solo and the Virs watched the two men, one a super soldier with an admitted zero amount of social skills, one a very dangerous gun for hire, play with small children, and did it well. Interesting.

Ten Minutes Later

It was with a not insignificant amount of hassle that everyone was seated. The children were at a smaller side table, talking amongst themselves, while the adults were seated at a massive long wooden table. It reminded most of them of some sort of medieval feast table. It was almost impossible to talk to the people on the other end, but, in the end, it somehow worked.

Vir and Shepard were next to their respective parents. Quill still looked as if he had no idea what was going on, and Solo was next to him, having no one else to talk to. Cooper had assimilated into the party wonderfully, and was next to the Virs. Cain was on one end, looking slightly uncomfortable with the knowledge that everyone else was uncomfortable near him. Poor Cain. Drake had his gloves back on, and was looking over everything like a hawk about to strike. The Chief was near the entrance door, having politely declined to eat anything. This consisted of a much kinder “no” from him. Oh, well.

It was after the first course was served that it happened. Everyone was talking, the idle dinner chit-chat so common amongst human parties. The waiters had moved out of the way, their job temporarily done. The double doors that led to the ballroom opened, ever-so quietly. An unmistakable human figure, dressed in an all-black jumpsuit and mask, stepped forward, pistol outstretched, pointed at the table. Before anyone saw him, it would already be too late.

His arm was twisted, knocked aside with such force he was left temporarily breathless. The gun dropped out of nerveless fingers, and the assassin screamed as the Master Chief broke the radius and ulna with a crush of his massive hand. The black-clad killer only had a slight second for shock and utter horror to register beneath the mask as the Chief’s gauntleted hand punched him so hard it left a dent in the wall where his body impacted.

A second assassin, wielding a much more powerful compact submachine gun, stepped into the space her fellow had vacated, weapon already raised and ready to fire. Master Chief was out of position. For all his speed, for all his lethal reactions, the Chief would be too low, and he knew it. Shots would be fired before he got there.

Gunfire rang out, the individual cracks! of pistol fire. Drake and Cooper stood, hands forward, clutching guns they had summoned from the recesses of their coats. The assassin’s head exploded, brains scattering in a ruined mess. Children screamed. The killer’s dead body slumped backward, into the hallway. The Chief grabbed her weapons and shut the door behind him.

The Scoundrels were all standing now, as was Hannah Shepard and Vir’s father. Drake slid out of position, pushing his chair back in, and opened his coat.

“Gentlemen,” his voice broke the eerie silence of the ballroom as everyone tried to react to what had happened. “Meet your dates for tonight.” Inside his coat lay a veritable armory. Pistols and full magazines hung from holsters and hooks. Dozens. Dear lord. Cain, Solo, and Quill were already on him, picking guns that looked closest to what they normally wielded. Drake slid the other weapons on the table, which were soon joined by those of the assassins. He grabbed most of the sharp steak knives off the table, and tucked them in his belt or gave them to his fellows.

“Drake?” asked Vir tentatively. “How is it possible to carry that many guns and still move normally?” Drake grinned as he pulled what looked like a sawed-off plasma rifle from his pants and assembled it.

“Cybernetics in the coat. And beneath.” He tossed a weapon to each of his comrades, and one each to Hannah Shepard and Vir’s father.

“You two know what you’re doing with these, I think,” he said. “Right. So, uh, yeah. I am going to take all the unstable maniacs, no offense intended as I am one, and we are going to kill everyone who dares interrupt this glorious dinner, while all of you who need catching up go catch up with your families,” Drake gave an elaborate bow to the still shocked table. “Please ignore any explosions, music, gunshots, and unpleasant gurgling noises.” He made a move to leave, followed by Quill, Solo, Cooper, and the Chief. Hannah Shepard held up a hand.

“Wait! I wouldn’t want you to get yourselves killed on our behalf,” she said. Drake only gave a lopsided grin in response.

“Haven’t you heard? Legends never die.” With a cackle of maniacal laughter and swirl of greatcoats, they were gone.

And there we have it. I hope you enjoyed the story. More to come soon! If you have any questions, comments, criticisms, concerns, or requests, feel free to tell me!

#magnificent scoundrels #story #writing #my writing #crossover #mass effect #halo #empyrean iris

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bumbershots · 3 years

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THE AGE OF THE UNDERSTATEMENT

Author’s note: Hello! So last winter I spent it binge watching so many Mexican soap operas, A LOT of old winter Olympics footage, and Harry Styles music videos so I came up with this idea, but didn’t really did anything until I was writing the one shot for the playlist challenge and the characters sort of came to life. I wrote the whole idea for every chapter so I don’t slack (like with my other story lol) anyway. Here’s the result. Enjoy! (:

Story page ★ Word count: 2.6K

Chapter one: Time

It’s snowing outside. Small, thin flakes that can be easily mistaken for hail, until they stick to the window and melt into the glass. Selena wants nothing more than to track the damp streak with one of her fingers, a bad habit she keeps from when she was a kid —one of many. She refrains from doing so because duty calls, there are a minimum of ten things that she was asked to help with right now. She makes her rounds across the wedding venue, instructing the string quartet where to place the chairs, confirming for the hundredth time that the bride’s father is not sneaking cupcakes out of the catering team or trying to have one last pre-wedding conversation with her fiancé.

In another situation she would’ve delegated the tasks to Minako and Paloma or any of the other bridesmaids. But Selena needed to stay busy, just so her thoughts don’t draw a mindmap, a list of everything that went wrong in her life for the past three weeks. A complete disaster, one bad choice after another one. A mistake on her side, a mistake on his, all of them domino-stumbling into each other, where the only possible outcome was to try to go back to how things were before she committed the first fault.

The good and bad thing about Selena, is that she’s also very efficient, fifteen minutes later she is done with her duties and is dismissed by Maki, the bride herself. But this free time more than a blessing is a curse that leaves her dwelling and all of a sudden she is aware of how alone she is feeling. Selena is alone, literally and figuratively, she is so unused to it. For someone who grew up in a big family, surrounded by aunts, grandmothers, cousins, nieces and nephews —some of them not even related by blood. She used to be so comfortable in her solitude, when she first moved to Tokyo. But it somehow feels weird when it is not self-inflicted. She stands in the empty corridor, feeling lost, before she decides to find the only person who won’t make her feel alone, whose presence is always a silver lining in her life, and who is apparently the only person that she will keep coming back to over and over again.

She finds Viktor going over his speech in the car park, he is leaning against his car, his brow knitting deep in thought, eyes scanning quickly the paper before him. He looks seconds away from giving up his task —or the wedding altogether. But he won’t actually leave, because he cares about Maki too much, just like all the other guests. Selena knows that although Viktor is not a very romantic person, he will at some point in his lecture, make the bride cry with whatever unexpected analogy he’d come up with.

It’s freezing, colder than the usual, even for a December morning. Selena pulls her coat closer to her body and rubs her hands together, another poor attempt to channel her anxiety to another part of her body.

Her companion doesn’t miss it, but all he says, after folding the paper he had in half and a long exhale, is, “I’ve always wanted to attend a summer wedding, right before the sunset and as the ceremony takes place so does the sun in the horizon… and the twilight comes in view and seals the couple’s love with its last beaming rays.” Viktor lends his scarf to a now shivering Selena. “When it’s your turn, promise me you’ll have a summer wedding, at the end of June?”

Selena’s first thought in response to this is not the discomfort she was expecting, but actually a quick flash of what her long time friend just described, it seems ridiculous when she is too certain that something like that will never happen in her life. Not when she doesn’t even have anything close to a stable relationship in her present.

“Why would you bestow upon me such expectation or needing to marry a man… someone, anyone, if ever. It is very sexist of you—”

“Please, shut the hell up.” Viktor unbuttons his coat, completely unbothered by this weather, a mark of the Russians.

Weirdly enough, Selena does shut the hell up. Something so rare that has Viktor going still. From her periphery, Selena sees her friend stay quiet, probably pondering what he is about to ask next, because he knows that he only has one chance to do it right, that’s how Selena is about things that bother her. If you are unable to articulate the appropriate question, she won’t say anything.

“Where’s Harry?” says Viktor. “Is he charming the string quartet already?”

“We had a fight.” Selena breathes out, glad to get that off her chest, the mist from her breath curls upwards until it’s undistinguishable. “I don’t think he will come.”

“Why?”

Because it was a big fight, an ugly one. She thinks but doesn’t say, still Viktor can tell and he scoffs.

“God what a dick.”

Supposedly Viktor was friends with both Harry and Selena, but it doesn’t really feel like that for him, not after the incident last week. Not when Harry was acting jealous every time Viktor was around. He is not one to romanticise that behaviour and call it love. He sees it as a red flag, one that he would immediately discuss with Selena, but not now when she looks like she’s attending a funeral and not a wedding. Viktor and Selena share a lot of things and they have planted plenty of questionable habits on each other, but beating around the bush was not one of them. But her vulnerability can be felt in the freezing air, in every misshaped snowflake and Viktor studies her, not liking the apprehension on her face.

“But he will come,” says Viktor.

Selena lets out a bitter laugh, refusing to look up. “Why would he? He doesn’t even know the bride or groom.”

Viktor leans away from his car, before he slips out of his coat.

“I would,” he says, wrapping her in the garment carefully, “because of the cute girl who asked me to, and the free food.”

◇

All flights were postponed due to the snow. Harry laughs, knowing it is completely ridiculous that the moment he is looking to get out of Japan, a blizzard comes out of nowhere to prevent it. As if there’s someone up above, directing his acts, trying to get him to attend the wedding he was dressed up for and invited to only a couple of days ago. It’s unfair, and he feels uncomfortable to be stranded at the airport. Harry is tempted to call Selena, knowing that she won’t deny him the chance to stay at her place until his flight can take off the next morning.

There’s no way he is calling her, not after the fight from the other day. All the things she said filled his head to the brim and it had been constantly dripping unkind thoughts about her. He decides to just wait at the airport, a bench can’t be the worst place to sleep tonight.

But a tap on his shoulder saved him from what would’ve been a really dreadful day and night. Harry finds himself face to face with the last person he expected to see today in Japan.

“I’m going to give you a moment alone, so you can sit with what you’re feeling. When I return we will talk about it.”

There’s a knot on his chest, but he nods. “Yes, thank you Sam.”

As soon as Sam has disappeared upstairs, Harry goes to stand by the window, and stares at what is probably one of the nicest views of Tokyo. He wanted to yell, cry until his voice ran out and his eyes were so swollen that he would have trouble opening them for the next few days. He could scream and Sam wouldn’t hold it against him, but just one look at the city before him was a reminder that he was not home. It’s one thing to have a much needed breakdown in his own flat under the watchful eye of his friend and bandmate Mitch and another to disrupt the peace of Sam’s loft. It’s one and a half floors that Harry has associated with calm and security from the moment he first stepped into it three weeks ago, and while he had never played any part to this, he’d rather have a crisis at the airport where everyone can see and judge him than to threaten the tranquility so shamelessly.

He rests his forehead on the window and breathes like that, counting and counting until he hears Sam return. He expects her to join him but she continues to the kitchen and Harry just follows with his gaze.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Sam asks, tying up a black apron, standing in her pristine white kitchen. Harry wants to tell her that nothing too fancy, that he’s not even hungry. But he can’t say anything.

It all feels so foreign, watching Sam cook him breakfast, fighting with Selena, being in Japan. It all piled up on Harry’s shoulders until he couldn’t carry it any longer. It dawns on him that he doesn’t know what he really wants.

“I’ll make an omelette.” She concludes after his silence.

If Harry believed more in the strengths of his relationships, he would say that they both find comfort in each other. Sam being the only person who didn’t get invited to the wedding and Harry being the only one that shouldn’t have. But he doesn’t know her that well, all he knows is what Selena told him that night before they arrived at her place for dinner.

Well she was dating Maki last year, but they broke up. She had carelessly said and for a moment it unsettled Harry, how little she cared about her friend’s feelings. They don’t like to talk about it, so we don’t. Boundaries, something that everyone in their circle seemed to have. It’s the reason why he was so surprised at Sam’s offer to stay at her place until his flight is rescheduled.

Ten minutes later, he is summoned to the living room area. “I was debating whether to ask why you are dressed for a funeral,” says Sam, walking back to the kitchen counter to retrieve their mugs. It’s almost lunch time, but she leaves a mug of steaming black coffee in front of Harry. Then she nods at where Harry left the black jacket of his two-piece suit draped over the arm of the sofa. “But I remembered about the winter wonderland wedding you’ll both be attending.”

Both.

Harry sits up over the old peeling couch, he crosses his legs under him and Sam takes the one-seater to his left, eyes sharp on how Harry crinkles his pants.

“We don’t have to talk about the wedding.”

“You seem to be under the impression that you talking about the wedding will unsettle me but I can assure you that is not the case.”

Harry’s eyes widened. “No, no,” he says. “It just seems unnecessary, whatever issue I have is not related to the wedding.”

Sam levels him a flat look. “Please don’t take this the wrong way, Harry. But you’re terrible at explaining what bothers you.”

“Yeah, that is true.” Harry takes a big chunk of omelette and stuffs it into his mouth. A childhood habit to keep his mouth shut. He watches Sam take a spreader knife to push some jam across the fresh loaf of bread she stopped to get on her way home. “I just wanted to avoid talking about the wedding, the attendees, what happens after the wedding.”

“Just to spare my feelings?”

“Yes, because I know I would feel uncomfortable upon hearing how my ex is getting married this afternoon—”

“Harry,” says Sam. “I don’t feel uncomfortable.”

How can you not? He thinks. Having finished almost all of the omelette, Harry resorts to spreading two thick layers of jam onto an open-faced slice of bread, before folding it in half and shoves it into his mouth. “I can’t look at Selena in the eye ever again anyway.” He said, as he chewed.

“Why?” She is slower in her rituals, more careful as she spreads jam to the very tips of her slice.

“I just can’t.” Harry swallows. The bread is soft and fluffy, the jam has the perfect balance of sweet and citrusy but it still doesn’t go down as easily. “Because it’s such a mess, I feel terrible about everything right now and there’s a chance I go and pass on my bad mood to the attendants. Why would I turn a wedding into a funeral? I can’t get away with that, I’m no Hugh Grant. I don’t know if I can look at Selena in the eye and she’s the reason I was invited. She probably doesn’t even want me there or anywhere anymore. And it’s fine that she doesn’t. It’s her brother’s wedding who also might not want me there. I just don’t even know how to exist anymore. I don’t want to carry all the feelings I have for her back to England where they will surely rot along what’s left of my heart. I wish I was dressed for a funeral, mine if possible. I spent all fucking morning tying up this tie—”

“Breathe,” says Sam. Her knife is hesitant, waiting for Harry to actually breathe, before it is back to sliding smoothly across the bread. Harry knows she’s studying him, trying to ask him about the argument he had with Selena, most likely preparing a speech about why Maki or anyone in that family would want him there. “Have another slice of bread.” Sam doesn’t push him to talk about that or anything, they finish their meal in silence and it gives Harry some time to collect his thoughts for the first time today.

He helps with the washing up because however far away from home, he can’t shake off the manners his mother taught him. As he finishes, the clock by the wall announces that the time to make a choice is running out. Harry can stay here and wait for an update on his flight. He can go to a hotel and thank Sam for her kindness. He can leave his stuff here and figure out how to get to the wedding by train, bus or even scooter. He has time to decide and it occurs to him that it doesn’t apply just for today but any other for that matter.

It’s strange how for the past couple of weeks he felt like he was living towards a deadline, that any minute he spent was some sort of borrowed time. Harry doesn’t feel any of that frustration as Sam wipes clean the coffee table, who’s methodical about even this, each movement measured and easy to follow.

The loft is quiet, nothing but Harry’s level, unhurried breathing in the space around them. Sam finishes her task and focuses her gaze on him, unfaltering for a second before she turns away.

“Grab your jacket. We’re heading out.”

“What?” Harry is surprised, but he goes to do as he’s told, frowning at his luggage by the door.

“You can leave that in here.” Sam slips on her jacket in one smooth motion, shoes slipping on her feet easily. “We’re going for a drive.”

Harry fixes the collar of his shirt. “Where to?”

“That depends.”

“On what?”

“On the things you choose to tell me during the drive.” Sam props open the front door and Harry follows right behind.

But he is not rushing this time, whatever choices he does make today will be the right ones, whether he regrets them or not will be something to look back on, years from now. But as he climbs into the passenger seat of Sam’s black convertible, the city passes by his side. Harry is sure that for now, he has all the time in the world.

△△△

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles oc #harry styles series #harry styles fluff #harry styles imagine #harry styles fan fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fandom #harry styles ou #the age of the understatement

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vettelewis · 3 years

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Lewis Hamilton: ‘There are so many things to fight for’

In his 14th season in Formula One, Lewis Hamilton has won more races than anyone else. And with his win in Turkey earlier this month, he achieved a milestone not just in his career but in the history of his sport: a seventh world title. But it’s also his actions off the circuit that make him our Game Changer Of The Year, as he takes a knee and raises a fist for the global Black Lives Matter movement

By any standards, even if Lewis Hamilton hadn’t spoken into a single microphone this year and hadn’t sent a single tweet and hadn’t once bent knee to ground in order to shake up the very male and oh-so-pale world of Formula One, he would have had one of the most remarkable years of his life. In winning the Portuguese Grand Prix in October, the 35-year-old surpassed Michael Schumacher’s record of 91 race wins, a feat most in the sport felt untouchable. And with his victory at the Turkish Grand Prix earlier this month, he equalled the German’s seven world championships. As his race engineer Peter Bonnington succinctly put it, “You are rewriting the history books.”

But GQ’s Game Changer Of The Year is not only a sporting great: he has quite literally used his exalted platform – or, more specifically, podium – to raise the issue of race in a sport for which it rarely comes up, precisely because there are so few black faces in it. In taking a knee before races – and even making his team change the colour of its car – he has pushed for change in a world that badly needed changing, consequences and criticisms be damned. GQ spoke to him as he was on the cusp of claiming his seventh championship and found that, both on and off the track, he’s just getting started...

Misan Harriman: What was your motivation when you first decided to take the knee?

Lewis Hamilton: I remember watching the video [of George Floyd’s death]. This life extinguished in front of my eyes by the people who are hired to protect others, and I heard when he was calling for his mum. This happens time and time again and that’s why there’s been such a large cry out. When I was watching it, tears came, so many emotions came up. It brought stuff up of my past. I started experiencing racism when I was five and people looked upon it so lightly, when someone would throw out these words, the bullying and the beatings and the intimidation... My dad always said, “Do your talking on the track,” so I held my tongue, but we suppress a lot of things and all my suppressed emotions came up and I was like, “You know what? I have to do something. I cannot stay silent.” If we all stay silent, it will continue for generations. I look at my niece and nephew and do not want them to experience what I experienced.

How do you feel about the response from F1? Thirteen drivers knelt with you in Spain and I think seven didn’t...

It’s not always a good thing for me, but I often post out of just kneejerk reaction, passion. And I called everyone out. I see all of you out there who have platforms, who have a following and just stay quiet. My team was the first to react. Since I joined, I remember mentioning that this team is not diverse. Year on year, I would talk about how our team is not diverse, how our sport is not diverse. So I got to sit down with my team and get into deep conversation of what is going on. And, you know, we changed the car to black and that had to go through a chain of command. Everyone got on board and it was overwhelming to see the response from our partners, because logo colours had to change. Brands put the issue first rather than themselves. I think as a sport, they were very, very nervous of what the right steps were. We saw the reaction: 13 drivers, as you said, took the knee. Obviously, the ones that didn’t, I don’t know if some drivers were like, “I’m not doing it because this is what Lewis is doing” or whether they didn’t get it... I think there are plenty of people in our sport that still don’t understand what we’re doing.

Do you think it helps that your record is so extraordinary that it adds to your ability to do this within the sport? If you weren’t winning, would it be harder?

Well, you can look at some other sports and there’s some people that aren’t super successful yet, but the more successful [you are], the wider your audience, the wider the impact. I’ve had a very, very difficult life and I’ve been thinking a lot about all these wins. I’ve had a lot of success in my racing career. It’s a great feeling, it’s a real privilege, but what does it really mean? All these numbers... what is it? Why was I the one who was chosen to represent black people in our sport? But I think as my life is unravelling, as the journey unravels itself, my purpose here is to utilise my voice to help encourage change. And my goal, really, is to shift the sport in a direction that it perhaps wouldn’t have gone if I wasn’t here. And most certainly not have gone if the Black Lives Matter movement hadn’t started, if George’s life wasn’t so visible.

You were critical of Vitaly Petrov’s comments about Black Lives Matter before the Portuguese Grand Prix. Was it a mistake for the FIA to appoint him as race steward?

I don’t know whether they call it a mistake. I think that the FIA is a large organisation and they are leaders and if you’re going to state what your values are and what you fight for, yet you hire people who don’t seem to have those in common... I don’t understand. I don’t personally get that. I don’t really know the guy very well and I won’t really comment about whether he’s good or not – I think his results speak for themselves over his career – but I thought that it was a step in the wrong direction or even a step backwards. But, you know, you look at Donald Trump, people can obviously see he’s racist. He even said, “I am the least racist person in this room,” so he’s acknowledging [it]. But people are willing to put aside the fact that he’s said so many bad things about minorities, for wealth or for other policies.

Formula One rules were changed after the Tuscan Grand Prix to effectively ban T-shirts with political statements after your Breonna Taylor message. Will you ignore those rules in the future?

If I believe it is important enough, I will. I will do it again. Going into that weekend, the case with Breonna Taylor had really been on my mind and I’ve been chasing down this shirt for weeks. Every weekend that I arrive, we have the spotlight on us and every weekend there is an opportunity to raise awareness. We don’t live in a time when everything is OK. And I remember as I went through the day I was like, “OK, I’ve got to win this race. I can’t come second and wear this top.” So I remember racing my heart out, pushing with every ounce for first place and I remember getting that win and I was like, “OK. I’m here for you, Breonna.” And I put that shirt on and in the 70 years of our sport, no one’s ever stood up there for anything but themselves. And I was standing up there for someone else. It was one of the greatest feelings.

You’re virtually in uncharted territory, on the verge of a record-equalling seventh F1 world championship. Is it sinking in? Is your operating system even able to process what that means?

I remember winning my first championship when I was ten years old and I remember how great that day was. My dad was – is – a tough man. It was really not easy to make that man happy, but I remember winning that championship and we had the best moment – we went away singing, “We are the champions.” And I remember the relief I had in that period of time, because I wasn’t good at anything else. I struggled at school, no matter how hard I tried. Then I won these other championships and, as I started getting older, I realised it doesn’t change anything. Like, it’s a relief of tension for a second, the muscle can let go, but then you’re like, “OK. What’s next?” And it’s taken time to be present and enjoy the moment for a longer period, because it passes so fast. I never thought I’d get to seven. No one ever believed that I would ever get to seven. And now I’m on the verge of equalling the most successful driver of all time and [have] more race wins and I have a chance to potentially go and win more championships. Even if you just take my name away, there will always be at the pinnacle of our sport someone of colour. So I’m very proud of that and I think that’s probably the thing I’m going to be most proud of.

Do you think you have reached your own limits or do you think you can get even better? And would you love to race everyone in the same car, without any advantage?

Well, firstly, on the driving side of things, you know, I was just doing the race yesterday and I was going through this race realising that I’m getting stronger. My skills are getting sharper – my intuition and understanding of strategy, my understanding of my tires... I’m getting stronger and I didn’t expect that. And I didn’t know at what point I was going to plateau, but I’m realising that I’m getting better and that is a great feeling. But it doesn’t come without the hard work. There’s no coincidence that I’m driving the way I am. And, of course, we do live now in a sport where there’s such a gap between all the teams. And people try to devalue what I do because of the machine that I have, so without doubt, I would love to have everyone in the same car, with a track that enables you to really, really race. And then we’ll see... Like, [Fernando] Alonso, I beat him in my first year, straight out. I was 22 years old, a rookie, and I finished ahead of him. Even today, you know, people talk about Max [Verstappen]. Like, it’s probably never ever going to happen, but if I did have Max come into my team and I did the job I currently do and beat him, people would say, “Oh, it’s rigged.”

What about the rumours of you ever being tempted by the red paint of Ferrari?

That’s not going to happen. The Ferrari thing is not going to happen... I think. I’ve always been positive about Ferrari. I watched Michael win there. I’ve always been a Ferrari fan. I remember one of the first cars I ever bought was a Ferrari. And I think it’s a hugely iconic team and brand, particularly. I think the team has, in my period of time... There have been things I’ve seen that I don’t necessarily feel mirror my values and my approach. However, it is a team that every driver, I think, has dreamed of what it would be like to sit in the red cockpit. No disrespect to them, but when I stop I want to work with Mercedes in helping them be even better in the outside world. You know, they’ll always have beautiful cars, but how can we be a more diverse industry?

So when you stop, what are you going to do? Salsa dancing, fishing, Fifa?

Definitely not salsa dancing. And definitely not fishing. I’m vegan! I’m not going to catch fish out of the sea! There’s a lot of different things that I want to do. I would say on the fun side of things for me, I’d love to try a bit of acting. I love my music, so I’ll continue to do my music. And I want to continue to want to learn to play the piano. I really would love to learn a language. My mum is a dancer, so I may take her to go and do a dance course with her son. But then, on the business side of things, there’s not a lot of black-owned businesses in the Fortune 500, for example, and I’ve had the privilege of working with someone like Tommy Hilfiger, who’s really opened my mind to the fashion industry. And I love that industry. I really do have a dream of one day having a fashion brand that’s fully sustainable, fully ethical. I’m always going to be trying to get involved in tech, because that’s the key to the future, I think. And then, most importantly, working with organisations out there to raise awareness for important issues that I care about. There are so many things to fight for.

Lord Hain, who was a Labour cabinet minister and who vice-chairs the All Parliamentary Group On Formula One, said it was “unacceptable” that you hadn’t had a knighthood yet. Is he right?

Well, it’s the first I’ve heard about this! It’s not what I’m racing for. I’m not like, “I’ve got to win these races so I can be knighted.” My granddad served in the Second World War – I’ve got all his medals – and I was so proud to see Captain Sir Tom get his knighthood this year. I think the unsung heroes are the ones that deserve these things. If I’m one day honoured, I don’t think it’s something I’d say no to, but it’s not an issue for me right now. Like, I’m really grateful. The fact I’ve even had the opportunity to go to Buckingham Palace and I’ve got an MBE – like, wow, a kid from Stevenage, so I’m grateful for that. Look at Captain Tom, he was 100 years old before he got recognised.

The black community, obviously, are very proud of our own and sometimes I think the frustration is your level of success should have been recognised a lot earlier on. And maybe, ironically, your activism is getting that kind of attention, instead of what you’ve done on the track, which is a surreal thing to say. I actually think the Lewis Hamilton of 2020, what you’ve done off the track, is almost making as much noise as you making history by beating Schumacher’s record.

The mixed feelings that I’ve had this year... I could never have ever dreamt of having the year that we’ve had, in the sense of the sadness, the isolation, the trials and tribulations. This is going to be the one I remember the most, I think, and, you know, I still have a job to do: I’ve got to win the seventh title. And when I win that seventh title, what am I going to do with it? I’m still going to be taking a knee and using my voice on that day. But I’m near. I’m closing in on it. I’m still energised. I came back last night [after the Emilia Romagna Grand Prix in Italy] and I was like, “I can’t believe I just won that race,” but the thing is, the world moves on so fast, you just keep going.

#my jaw is on the floor #lewis hamilton #f1 #txt #long post

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hecalledmehanbana · 3 years

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From My Journal (one of them at least)

I just found a journal I wrote in fairly regularly a few years ago. This is one of the things I had written in it. I wrote it the day after my grandpa died, so on September 22, 2014. On the 21st, I played the avoidance game by watching psychological thrillers because I didn’t know how to process all of my emotions, so I wanted to pretend there was nothing wrong. At that time, I was not around any of my family. I lived in Dallas, Texas, and he was in South Dakota, my parents were there, my sister was in Colorado, my other sister was in Oregon with my nephew and my Broha was stationed in Germany. I have always felt things really strongly, and needed the stability of a normal day before I could begin navigating the beneficial stages of grief, because denial does nothing good for mental health. Also, I had this awful habit of using commas excessively, which resulted in run-ons pretty much every sentence. I don’t feel super comfortable with the pronouns I use in this, but I didn’t want to change them because I was in a very different place 7 years ago. I had severe self esteem issues and my mental health was just a struggle I felt deeply that had no diagnosis. I wasn’t out at all, and like now, I really struggled with change. But most of that has no bearing on this piece of writing. It basically just tells you more about where I was.

The quiet engulfed her. The steady sound of the appliances running and the dull sound of traffic going by comforted her. Her world was slowly closing in. She didn’t want to believe it, she refused to believe it. There was no way he was gone. He was going to be there at her wedding and when she graduated from college. He was going to live in that familiar white house, continuing to grow old with his wife. He was going to sit at that expandable oak table in the kitchen, drink his coffee and eat his toast in the morning; say that he was “better than nothin’,” when asked how he was and tell everyone he feels with his fingers when asked how he felt. He was supposed to sit in his chair, do crosswords, and turn off his hearing aids when it got too loud. He wasn’t supposed to be gone yet. She wasn’t ready to face the world without him. She wasn’t ready to go to that well-loved house on Neel Street where five kids grew up, and see only one person living there. She just wasn’t ready. She’s still not ready. She’s still not ready to believe he’s gone, to address letters to to just one person, not both. She’s still not ready to know that when she calls, she’ll never hear that gruff hello that brought back memories. She’s still not ready to not have the option to watch the game with him, to not have to see if he’s taking a nap so she knows if she can get on the computer. She’s just not ready. And she’s especially not ready to say goodbye, to accept the fact that he is really gone. She doesn’t want him to only be her guardian angel. She wants to be able to call him just to check in, or surprise him while he’s eating at the truck stop. She wants to go to Thrift Center for hot chocolate and a donut and just sit and listen while that group, the familiar group of friends is reminiscing about the past, talking politics, “Too much ‘Made in China’, not enough ‘Made in the USA’,” bragging about families, and the never-ending onslaught of questions about school, the future, home, hobbies, sports.

The girl that’s not ready to let go? That girl is me. I’m not ready to say goodbye, not ready to call their house and know that my grandpa will never answer that call again. I’m not ready to never get one of his hugs again, never laugh at a joke coming from his mouth again. I’m not ready for him to not be able to tell me that story of, “When I was a kid, we used to walk to school up hill both ways, in the snow”. More than any of that though, I’m not ready to not have someone to call grandpa. I’m not ready to say goodbye.

I knew it was coming, but how do you prepare yourself? How do you say, someday soon my grandpa won’t be here. Someday soon, you’re going to have to accept that fact. Someday soon, you’ll have to say goodbye, but that day is not today, so how is it possible to prepare yourself for the inevitable? I live in the present, that is my choice, that is what I do. I knew it was coming and I chose not to think about that coming day. I chose to focus on what I was doing that day, and to take each day as it comes. I pretended that it wasn’t going to happen, that he would be here forever, grow old with grandma, live life day-to-day in that familiar white house that housed their five kids, and once they grew up, housed their nieces, nephews, family of any kind, biological and non-biological.

I spent months in that house, I spent summers and holidays. I learned how to make little trinkets out of wood, he taught me a little bit of car maintenance. My sarcasm, I inherited that from him. My devotion and sense of protection, I learned that from him too. He taught me so much, and so much of the person I am today, I am because of him. I may not be ready to let him go yet, but I have to. And he is not ever really leaving, we see him in every one of the people he influenced and met.

He’s not here anymore, but now I have a guardian angel who loves his family with the fierceness of a lion. I will forever be grateful that I got the years I did with him.

#saying goodbye #family #truth #throwback #inner thoughts #emotions #writing is my therapy

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queenofpcrtugal · 4 years

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❝ ⤚⟶ EUROPE, 1458. thanks is given by the QUEEN OF PORTUGAL, CRARA BRAGANZA, from PORTUGAL. they are at best GENEROUS, and at their worst VINDICTIVE. whilst abroad, their ambition is to STRENGHTEN THE POSITION OF HER COUNTRY BY CREATING ALLIANCES, AVENGE HER SISTER. SHE seems to remind everyone of LENA HEADEY & SCENT OF MUSK AND AMBER, PEARLS SCATTERED ON THE MARBLE FLOOR,SILENCE AFTER ASKING AN UNCOMFORTABLE QUESTION❞ penned by LUX, GMT + 2, SHE/HER, 23.

Hello to all of you !! I’m Lux, and here’s my cersei’s & catherine de medici inspired baby, Crara; come to me for plotting, just don’t cry if she bites you :3

FULL NAME : CRARA MARIA BRAGANZA (NEE HENRIQUEZ)

TITLES ( FROM BIRTH UNTIL PRESENT ) :

Duchess of Valencia

Queen of Portugal

BIRTHPLACE : Valencia, Portugal AGE : 45 LANGUAGES : Portuguese, Spanish, Catalan, Latin, Arabic, English

DYNASTY / HOUSE:

MOTHER & FATHER: Teresa de Silva & Pedro Henriquez, descendant of the first King of Portugal of House of Burgundy

SPOUSE: Cristiano Braganza, King of Portugal

ISSUE : Crown Princess, Francisca 2nd Princess of Portugal 3rd Princess of Portugal

SIBLINGS : Duke of Valencia Costanza of Viana (Queen of Aragon) (†)

OTHER : Brother in law, Ferrando of Viana (King of Aragon) (†) Sister in Law, Lianor Braganza of England (†) Nephew, Arthur, Prince of Wales (†) Nephew, Harry, Prince of wales Niece, Beatrice, dowager duchess of Burgundy

ZODIAC : Scorpio RELIGIOUS AFFILIATION : Roman catholic ORIENTATION : Heterosexual PERSONALITY TYPE : ENTJ: The Commander (Extraverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Judging) VICES : vengeful, manipulative, proud VIRTUES : generous, open-minded, loyal FACECLAIM : Lena Headey HEIGHT : 5,54 ft RECOGNISABLE FEATURES : Long, wavy golden hair, green eyes. REPUTATION : To the people of Lisbon she is the extension of her father - a loyal advisor, always at the feet of the king’s throne, always ready to help. To other royals she is a cut-throat negotiator. A viper ready to strike. Above all else - a pious and devoted catholic (at least that’s what she wants people to believe) , generous hostess, a connoisseur of art.

WANTED CONNECTIONS :

Lover / s.

Though Crara and Cristiano have heirs, she still hopes to give him a son, and ensure the safety of their lineage on the throne. Or rather - her lineage. Restoring Henriquez' royal bloodline was her father's dream, and it is still hers... embedded in her, just like his lessons. She feels history gazing down at her. The amount of hours she spent praying for a son is countless, and the ocean of tears, every time she was sure she might be pregnant again, but wasn't - bottomless. But maybe God is merciful after all - if He made Sarah pregnant with Abraham's son at old age, maybe there is still a glimmer of hope for Crara ? She's desperate enough to take a lover who might bless her with what her husband couldn't, despite their mutual agreement that this is the last boundary they shouldn't cross.

Brother, Duke of Valencia

They are the last descendants of the great House of Burgundy, the last Henriquez children who count. She would die for him without asking twice, and she’s afraid that he could die for her - or, at least, wants to die foolishly, by the hand of their enemies. Like a devil on her shoulder, Duke of Valencia wants her to wage war against the Emirate of Cordóba, and she loves him enough to give in.

Allies ( new, different betrothals to her daughters )

Though her daughters are engaged, that doesn't mean they are wed. She wishes to influence and change some of those decisions to create international alliances and secure the position of Portugal in Europe. And everyone who sees the Emirate of Córdoba as an enemy - might be a potential ally.

Enemies

Crara wishes to know the truth. She loved her sister, her Costanza, too much to let the memory of her go down with the ship, and rest at the bottom of the sea. Sitting alone in the dark she thought of many possibilities of what could have happened, but one of it stood out the most : wasn't that too convenient? They had a chance to reclaim Aragon at last, with the help of France, and the murder of Muslim ambassador... She wishes to face the men who might have given the order and decide, what is it going to be : war or peace between them. She's equally willing to give them both, though her brother wants her to choose the first option and encourages her fiercely to do so. There wasn't a better opportunity to investigate, than having a potential murderer of her sister under her own roof. She spoke with wolves in the wolves' den, so she's used to facing enemies on the grounds far less pleasant than her own home.

HER-STORY.

Pedro Henriquez, late duke of Valencia, was a descendant of the first king of Portugal, Afonso I, member of the Capetian House of Burgundy, also known as Afonso Henriques or Afonso the Conqueror. He conquered Santarém and Lisbon from the Muslims (1147), secured Portuguese independence from Leon (1139), and established a dynasty who ruled for over two hundred years. However, in the mid XIV century house of Burgundy was overthrown as a result of economical decay and schemes of other, power-hungry Portuguese noble houses. The power struggle ended with a Braganza's rise to power. However, the house of previous kings did not disappear, on the contrary - they still stood close to the throne, waiting patiently for Braganza's mistake and opportunity to reclaim power.

Pedro, father of Crara, Costanza and duke of Valencia, knew very well that being a ruler doesn't necessarily mean sitting on a throne, but, sometimes - standing behind it, pulling the strings. He would whisper in the ear of the old king, and then the next one - Cristiano, while always making careful steps and creating a never-ending web of connections.

With Pedro as the head of Henriquez family their return to power seemed to be closer than ever with Crara by the side of the king of Portugal, and Costanza - as the wife of king of Aragon. Many speculated that Crara would be a great fit for the throne... if only she was a man.

Her father began to arrange her marriage with a man who was most likely to succeed the late king of Portugal when she was sixteen. Though it was carefully mastered plan, she did love him. Their love became the example of marriage in the whole Christiendom, but nowadays things are not as bright behind closed doors, especially since Crara, during her almost thirty-year of reign did not provide a male heir.

1458.

�� 𝐵𝒾𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝘉𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘯 𝐵𝓇𝑜𝓀𝑒𝓃.

How can one live only on love ? Her husband, no - her King's love was, for so many years, the beginning and the end for her - the base for her position on court, the core of the respect of others in his palace... Until she grew up and became a woman she was always meant to be. Not only a wife. An advisor. A ruler. Many called their marriage legendary, but if so, then her jealousy was legendary as we, at least for the majority of their marriage.

She grew bitter and cynical as well. Her eyes have seen all the pitiful and ugly faces of politics, and she now can only shake her head in awe when she sees people being lead so easily by their rulers' pledges. 𝒫𝒶𝓃𝑒𝓂 𝑒𝓉 𝒸𝒾𝓇𝒸𝑒𝓃𝓈𝑒𝓈 , once could say, but there were so many nuances in between. The trick, as her father used to say, is to rule over people well enough that they wouldn't feel they are ruled.

Crara doesn't give second chances too often. She may forgive but never forgets. She always wanted to be better than her sister and if she was offered to bring her back to life, she would refuse. The world without Costanza felt empty, but that was an emptiness she felt inside her too, every time she would compare herself to her pious, beloved sister, who at least was not a failure of a woman - she had a son, after all. Crara is unloved, because she can hardly love herself, knowing what she became, and she hates it. But she loves power too much to change it, and the state of self-loathing is quite comfortable at times.

#CRHS.INTRO #that was a long one but I hope It may somehow encourage you to plot ? :)#Also I will give my firstborn for duke of Valencia I need Crara's brother for angst !

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atths--twice · 4 years

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Okay... so Nothing Lasts Forever... I have to admit that the only parts of it I truly enjoy are the MSR scenes. The rest of the episode is creepy and honestly gross to me. So, the focus of this chapter will be on their relationship and not the story line. I think we can all agree that that is what is most important anyway, right? I mean, come on...

Chapter Thirty Nine

Shining Light

Time spent in church, prayers, discussions and decisions, lead to conversations that should have been had years ago.

March 2018

Scully woke up and felt off, the same way she had been feeling for a few days now. Something was not right, and she could tell. Turning onto her back, she sighed, so many thoughts running through her head. Closing her eyes she thought of the last few days.

Mulder had come over after the case in Connecticut and they had spent the night together, each healing the other in turn. They slept together, holding tight to the other, and she had ordered breakfast for them when they woke.

When he left, his eyes were saying things his mouth was not, and she felt inexplicably nervous. He kissed her forehead and left, no words spoken, and then no call or text for a couple of days. Things were strange between them, and she felt confused and off balance.

Pushing the covers back, she sat up and sighed, making a decision. She would go to mass and see if that helped. Recently she had been doing that more often, spending time at a church near the hotel. She did not always make it for a mass, but she found simply sitting in the church to be calming and peaceful. She took a quick shower, dressed, and headed for church.

The coolness of the holy water, the scent of the candles and pews, and the beauty of the stained glass brought back so many memories from her childhood. First communion, confirmation, her rebellious pull from church, her mother’s desire for her to find her faith once again, and how she found it again following her cancer diagnosis.

She sighed as she sat and closed her eyes, listening to the priest as he began to speak, but at the same time not paying much attention, drawing strength instead from the building itself and the memories it held. She felt for the quarter on a chain in her pocket and thought of her mother. She wished her mother was there, sitting beside her, ready to listen and offer advice for the worries plaguing her heart.

Scully knew how much her mother loved Mulder. She had known for years, and she could almost hear what her mother would say - It’s your decision, Dana. Nobody can make the decision for you.

Yes, she might say those words, but her eyes would silently be praying and begging for her to go back to him, to find her happiness again, and for them to be them again.

If only it were that easy …

She sighed again, her fingers rolling across the quarter in her pocket. “I’m trying,” she whispered. “We’re trying.” Sighing again, she let the quarter go and clasped her hands together, prayers passing silently across her lips.

Communion received, her mind still racing, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. Glancing at the screen, she sighed and walked out of the church, heading to meet Mulder for a new case.

Seeing the manner in which the victims were killed and the reason for it made Scully feel uneasy, because it reminded her of the case with Father Joe. She hated what that case did to her and Mulder, but it had forced them to talk in order to move forward. Following that case, a shift occurred. It was still a dark and sad time and was not something she liked to think about.

She investigated liver transplants in the area and found nothing out of the ordinary. Feeling the need to go back to a church, she texted Mulder where she would be and sent him the address. Opening the doors, she walked inside and dipped her fingers into the holy water, crossing herself as she knelt a bow at the pew before she sat down.

She sighed as she attempted to find peace in the church. So many thoughts swirled in her head, with Mulder first and foremost. She knew he was enjoying and welcoming this slow walk back to each other, and so was she, but what was the plan for the future? Were they just going to continue on this … visiting each other for comfort? Hanging out, going out to eat, and then sex if they felt like it? It was nice, very nice, but it was not enough. She wanted more, but was also scared to take that leap again.

She closed her eyes as she thought of the hurt she had suffered from their separation. The loneliness, the solitude, the feeling of missing her other half. She thought of William, or Jackson, whatever name he went by, and she knew she had failed him. His parents, the ones he had known his entire life, were dead and he was all alone in the world. A boy with amazing abilities who had no way of understanding how or why he possessed them was now alone and scared. Being young, ignorant, and powerful was a lethal combination, and she feared for him.

Opening her eyes, she looked to the front of the church and made a decision. She stood up and walked toward the candles, intending to light as many as she felt were needed to address the challenges she, Mulder, and their son now faced. Not many were lit initially and for that she was grateful. She knew she was going to be asking for a lot.

She did not want to be selfish in her prayers, so she lit one asking for peace and guidance for her family members. Nieces and nephews making life decisions they may not be prepared to undertake. She lit another and prayed for wisdom to do her job to the best of her ability and to help those who were unable to help themselves. She lit one for William, praying that one day she would have the chance to tell him the truth and be given a chance to explain why she made the decisions she made. The last candle she lit, she prayed for Mulder, for peace, understanding, and guidance that would be required for them to find their way back to one another.

As she lit his candle, Mulder appeared at her side joking about not bursting into flames as he crossed the threshold. She smiled at his joke, her prayer still in her head as she told him of the liver transplant recipients all being accounted for as he struggled to read off the information he gathered from a document on his phone without his glasses on.

“Oh, God, help me,” he said and she stared at him, amused. “Sorry.” He looked up and raised his hands as he put his glasses on, reading the screen of his phone and telling her what he discovered.

“I think we should hand this over to the NYC Organized Crime division, Mulder. I don't think this is an X-File,” she said, looking at him and shaking her head, as he raised his head in intrigue. “I'm gonna need some time here. I can meet up with you later, or you can wait for me.” He nodded and put his hand on her back before walking away.

She turned back to the candles, needing to finish her prayer. This one was for herself and she prayed for wisdom and guidance, and to not be such a fucking coward. With a small groan, she asked for forgiveness at her choice of language and crossed herself as she turned around.

What she saw made her heart skip and her breath catch. There Mulder sat, waiting for her, just as she had suggested. Though she had suggested and hoped, she had assumed he would wait for her as he always had, outside, or even meeting up at a nearby coffee shop. She honestly thought he had left to do just that, leaving her standing there alone, but he was different now. They were different. Maybe her prayers had been heard after all.

“You waited,” she said quietly as she came to stand beside him. He looked up at her and away from the bible he held in his hands. Once more she had to ask for forgiveness, as the glasses he wore gave her some very impure thoughts.

“I waited,” he answered in the affirmative, sliding over so she could join him in the pew. She sat beside him and smiled as he went back to looking at the bible in his hands. Her prayers continued as she sat down, her thoughts jumbling together as the past and present began to blend.

She heard him mentioning the scripture about vengeance and she smiled, telling him it was a common biblical passage. He looked so disheartened that she felt the need to share something with him.

“Did I ever tell you how I came to believe in God?” she asked quietly, knowing he would get a kick out of the story.

“No,” he said, shaking his head.

“When my brother Charlie was a baby, he got seriously ill. I think I was about four. I later learned that it was rheumatic fever.”

“Hmm,” Mulder nodded.

“Every night, Mom would tell us to get on our knees and pray for his recovery.”

“Your prayers were answered. He lived.”

“Only, after the first couple nights, I wasn’t praying for him,” she said, thinking of being a little girl again, her prayers so big. “I was praying for a puppy.” Mulder gave a big quiet laugh, and she laughed with him. “And we got one that Christmas. I thought God had performed a miracle.”

“I finally know why I’m not a Christian, Scully. My parents never got me a puppy,” Mulder said with a smile, and she laughed quietly.

“So are you-you praying for another miracle now?” he asked her curiously.

“I don’t know if I do believe in miracles. But I do know the power of faith,” she told him softly, as she took her mother’s quarter from her pocket. “I saw it in my mom, the strength that she received.” She stared at the quarter, holding it in her fingers. “I could use some of that strength now.”

She put the quarter back in her pocket and smiled. “I need what you have. You always bear north, Mulder … no matter which way or how hard the wind blows against you.” She stared at him with a smile, and he smiled back.

“I think all I have- all any of us have are the results of all the choices that we’ve made. And at the end of the day, we just hope that we made the right one,” he said softly and she nodded, closing her eyes, her choices weighing heavy on her heart. “Don’t know if that measures to what you’re saying, but it’s what I feel.” She opened her eyes and looked at him, his smile so open. She sighed and nodded again.

“Five minutes, okay?” she whispered, and he nodded, putting his glasses back on and picking up the Bible.

“Make it ten, I’m really interested in the Old Testament. Curious what happens to this Joseph fellow,” Mulder said and she laughed, closing her eyes again.

“Oh." She heard beside her a few minutes later. “That took a dark turn.” She heard the book close and then his deep sigh. She smiled again, both of them then quiet as they sat in a shared pew.

_____________________

Walking down the street to the church, Scully rolled her neck, fighting the crick in it since falling down the elevator shaft a few days ago. Shaking her head and then giving her whole body a quick shake, she attempted to release the thoughts of the possibility she had faced of falling to her death.

What a horrible way to go, she thought, shaking her head again.

Walking through the doors of the church, she took a second to look at the stained glass, as she always did. The colors were beautiful and this time of day, they were even more so. This was one of her favorite churches, mainly because of the beauty within the architecture and spectrum of light the windows created.

Sighing, she stepped to the candles, needing to offer up prayers again. More of the same, but one in particular. Crossing herself, she stared at them and then at the window above, admiring their beauty. She took a deep breath and grabbed a stick, lighting the first candle and giving thanks for her health and for no broken bones or serious injury in her fall. Another candle, asking for health and safety of her family. Another, for her mother, thankful for the love and advice she bestowed upon all of those around her. Another, for herself, asking for guidance and strength to do what she knew she wanted but was still afraid to voice.

The last candle was for Mulder. Well, more importantly for Mulder and her and the decision weighing heavily upon her mind and heart. Before she could offer up a prayer, the candle went out, and she heard Mulder’s footfall behind her. She would know that gait anywhere.

She turned and looked at him, and then back to the candle, the irony and humor not lost on her. He may not have burst into flames when he entered the church before, but here at the one she frequented, he apparently had some kind of power, making the last and most important candle go out.

“That must be a sign. I’m all out of miracles. Turn back. Give up.” He smiled and reached for a stick. “Accept your place in the numbing embrace of the status quo.”

“Mm-mmm,” he hummed, lighting the stick. “I will … relight your candle and extend your prayers through mine.” She smiled as she watched him, knowing he had no idea the intention she placed upon that candle.

“What prayers?” she asked, unable to resist teasing him.

“I can’t tell you. They won’t come true,” he said with a shrug.

“It’s a prayer candle, Mulder. Not a birthday cake.” She laughed and he chuckled softly.

“Prayers aren’t meant to be sentiment. It’s a conversation,” she said, looking down at the candles. “You can do it like a meditation, or if your needs exceed your grasp, you can ask God to act on your behalf. But you don’t believe in God,” she said, glancing up at him. “So you’d essentially be talking to yourself.”

“Well, I might not believe in God, but I believe in you. Therefore I speak to him through you.” She stared at him as he spoke, but he was not finished. “Through the transitive property of equality. If ‘A’ equals ‘B’ and ‘B’ equals ‘C,’ therefore ‘A’ equals ‘C.’ Reason and faith in harmony. Isn’t that why we’re so good together?” he asked her.

She stared at him, raising her eyebrows and moving her head, her eyes dropping to his lips. “Are we together?” He looked down, his face sad and thoughtful. He took a breath and started to answer her, but she cut him off. “You know, I believed I could protect our son, and I failed. I thought we could live together, and I fled.” She looked at him sideways, almost unable to meet his gaze head on. “I gave up on that, too.” She looked down and kept her eyes on the candles,

“If only you’d fled earlier,” he said and she looked at him. “You know how many times I’ve envisioned that scenario, where you left that basement office before I even needed glasses? You’d have your health, your dog, your sister.” He stared at her and she stared back. “You’d be Kersh’s boss at the FBI, and be married to some brain surgeon, and have a bunch of kids that you wouldn’t have to give up.”

She took a breath, waiting a beat. “Mulder, I don’t begrudge you any of those things. That’s not what I was talking about,” she said, looking down and then back up at him again.

“Well, what are we talking about, Scully? Because I don’t know if any God is listening, but I am standing right here, and I am listening. Right beside you. I’m all ears. That’s my choice.”

She stared at him, millions of thoughts running through her head. How she gave up William, gave up on them, and ran away. She did leave, but it had been for good reason, and yet … Still though, one thing had remained the same no matter the hurt and the pain they caused each other. He was there beside her, and she knew he always would be, no matter the context or label.

She looked around the church, having no idea how he even knew she would be there, and looked to see if anyone was around before she leaned forward and began to whisper in his ear. She thought about what she wanted to say, what words would be enough to convey her innermost feelings and desires.

“I’m ready, Mulder. For everything. I want my mystery answered and to stop chasing monsters.” He stood still and stared at her. She needed him to understand, to know her heart completely.

“That’s not my four-year-old self looking for a miracle,” she said, taking a deep breath. “That’s my leap of faith forward. And I’d like to do it together.”

Mulder nodded and kept his eyes on her. “I’ve always wondered how this was gonna end.” He stared at her before turning to pick up a stick and light the last remaining candle.

They stood there and watched the flame flicker and then his hand was holding hers and the tears in her eyes spilled over. “Like a conversation, you said?” he asked softly and she nodded, wiping at her eyes. He took a deep breath and squeezed her hand, keeping his eyes on the candles, as she watched his face.

“You didn’t flee, you saved us both. You didn’t give up on anything Scully, least of all me, or us. You saved us." He turned to her and stared into her eyes. “I told you years ago that you saved me, and that is just as true today as it was then. Even more so. You’ve been saving me for twenty five years, Scully. Keeping me honest and making me a whole person. Even apart, you are what keeps me whole.” He put his hand on her face and stroked her cheek, his thumb brushing away her tears. “Your goddamn strict rationalism. Oh …” He looked up heavenward, horrified, and she laughed, putting her hand over his on her cheek.

She closed her eyes as she laughed and cried, before opening them to look at him. His face was serious, and he let go of her hand to hold her face gently, shaking his head as he did.

“I stopped seeing you. I looked too far into the dark, and my shining light got left behind. A light only lasts so long before it goes out, the darkness swallowing it up." He shook his head and she cried harder, holding onto his wrist. “If you had stayed, your light would have gone out and we both … Scully, I can’t even fathom it. You didn’t flee, you made a decision that hurt. We were broken, and you saved us from being broken beyond repair. Any other form of breaking …” He sighed and shook his head.

She closed her eyes again, and he rested his forehead against hers. She took shaky breaths and then pulled back, looking at him, the man she loved for most of her life. She moved her hand from his wrist and stepped back, moving his hands from her face, holding them in her own. She looked down at their hands, his so large, keeping hers safe within.

“Scully,” he said so quietly, it was like a breath. He interlocked their fingers and squeezed as she looked up at him. He searched her face and she smiled softly. He glanced at the candles and took a breath. “I don’t know where to begin, how to answer our mystery, Scully. I don’t know how to find someone who is determined to stay hidden, as he should, but …” He turned his head to her and smiled gently. “Without hesitation, I would go to the ends of the earth to find him, if that’s what I need to do.”

“For the second time?” she said with a soft smile and he smiled with a nod.

“I know a guy with access to a snow cat,” he said with a shrug, and she laughed softly before letting go of his hands and stepping closer to him, her hands on his chest. He stared at her, and she sighed.

“I love you, Mulder,” she whispered. He grinned and put his hands on her waist, holding her lightly.

“If I kiss you, will the lightning hit me?” he asked softly, and she laughed again.

“It won’t, but I might if you don’t,” she said quietly, and he nodded, bending his head and kissing her softly, making her heart race. He straightened up and his hands pulled her closer, his forehead once more falling to hers.

“I love you, Scully. More than you could ever quantify or understand,” he whispered, and she smiled.

“Show off,” she whispered back, his answering chuckle making her smile.

They stood there, in front of the light of the candles, the beauty of the stained glass beside them, foreheads pressed together, and silent prayers being said between them. She closed her eyes, her decision made, her heart at peace. He was there, holding the other end of the line, making sure to never let her go again.

____________________________________________________

Like I said, I choose to focus on the less gory aspects of the episode as the MSR is so much better to gaze upon anyway. For so many reasons.

#The X Files #XF Fanfic #X Files Novel #Nothing Lasts Forever #Here we go... its time.#We have reached the point of no going back #They are finally ready #God we needed this so much

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journalisticdreams · 4 years

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How Bly Manor was (almost) perfectly splendid

As a big fan of Netflix’s Shirley Jackson adaptation of ‘The Haunting of Hill House’, my expectations for the follow up season ‘The Haunting of Bly Manor’ were extremely high. Personally, the prospect of seeing my favourite actors from the first season returning to endure the horrors of a brand new haunted house, and the unraveling of a new complex story was what I was most excited for. So, did ‘The Haunting of Bly Manor’ satisfy or leave me wanting more?

*SPOILER WARNING*

Rating: 3.5 / 5

Synopsis:

Put simply, ‘The Haunting of Bly Manor’ is a story about a young, American au pair hired by the ‘well-off’ uncle Henry Wingrave to govern his orphaned niece and nephew. As time goes on, odd occurrences ensue and the Manor is revealed to be haunted by a number of trapped souls.

My highlights:

When I first saw Hill House, I didn’t notice the hidden ghosts in the background until I was two episodes in and a friend pointed them out to me. Subsequently, I was highly anticipating the same technique being used in Bly Manor; and it definitely didn’t disappoint. There is something about the subtlety of the ghosts simply standing motionless, the characters being blindly unaware of their presence, that is so scary. It enforces a terrifying and looming atmosphere in the house that even when there isn’t anything particularly scary happening in a scene, a presence of evil lingers constantly. It also implies a heightened sense of how deep-rooted with ghosts the house really is. **

Similarly to the hidden ghosts technique, there is something to be admired in the simplicity of the scares in Bly Manor that is uncommon in many TV series and movies of the horror genre. The programme doesn’t rely on CGI and extravagant FX makeup to scare, it merely uses atmosphere and actual actors to play ghosts which makes it all the more scarier. As a comparison, the success of It Chapter One (2017) resulted in the budget of IT Chapter Two (2019) being over double of the first film in the franchise. By watching the second film, it is clear that the majority of the budget went towards the computerised special effects; this then creates excessively fake scares, producing a more comical than terrifying effect. So, by not being dependent on computerised special effects, the horrors of Bly Manor feel much closer to home and eerily realistic.

Bly Manor uses a narrative technique which I like to call the ‘drip effect’. Essentially, as each episode shows us a mix between a character’s background and slowly building up to a climax, the plot is gradually revealed bit by bit (or drip by drip) until everything all of a sudden clicks into place in an explosive ending. This way, the programme kept me intrigued throughout, leaving me craving that feeling of the last puzzle piece fitting into place. There is nothing more satisfying than your questions of the ghosts’ origins being answered; and in this sense Bly Manor was perfectly splendid.

Two words: Victoria Pedretti. My prayers were answered in season 2 as it showcased much more screen time for Pedretti that I was left craving after Hill House. I knew from her performance at the end of episode 1 that I was in for a rollercoaster of emotions; the way she portrays that genuinely gut-wrenching fear is captivating. By a happy coincidence, her character Dani’s backstory happened to be my favourite, and I truly sympathised with the heartbreak she endured in her past.

Criticisms:

I found ‘The Haunting of Hill House’ so legitimately creepy that after I first watched it, I found the Bent-neck Lady haunting my dreams for weeks after finishing the series. Disappointingly however, Bly Manor did not have the same effect that I was so anxiously (strangely) excited for. Don’t get me wrong, there were definitely jump scares that had me cussing and got my heart racing - like Viola’s hands reaching out of the treasure chest to strangle her intrusive younger sister from the arms of her old gowns, which was more than effective - yet these moments were few and far apart. Instead of being scared straight like Hill House, I was left slightly let down (of course, everyone’s horror tolerance is relative, so this may just be a more personal issue!).

Episode 8: The Romance of Certain Old Clothes... oh dear. For me personally, this episode was reminiscent of the Stranger Things episode entitled ‘The Lost Sister’; it felt dragged out and extremely slow paced, and pulled me away from the plot I was much more invested in. Plus, as much as I love Kate Siegel her British accent was hard to sit through. The episode didn’t entirely disappoint, as it did reveal the origins of the lady in the lake - however I found this to be one of its only redeeming qualities.

As the ending rolled around and we slowly made our way back towards the present time of the narrator recounting the stories of Bly Manor, it became much more obvious about the direction in which the show was heading. Personally, I found the reveal of the narrator being an older Jamie, and the wedding being Flora’s with all the remaining characters slightly cliche. In fact, I found it very cliche. After the twists and turns of the series, the last half an hour or so felt like it left so much less of an impact than Hill House - to paraphrase an older Flora, it definitely felt much more like a love story than a ghost story. As I went into the series imagining it to be pure horror, I was left a bit discouraged.

This is honestly ineffable but I didn’t feel as connected to the family dynamic as I did in Hill House. I know I keep comparing Bly Manor to Hill House, but I felt a lack of emotional investment in Bly Manor than I did in its predecessor. I only felt devoted to the relationships in the show toward the very end of this series (I naturally ended up loving Jamie and Dani’s relationship, it’s impossible not to).

Conclusion:

So in conclusion, whilst Bly Manor was beautifully directed and introduced us to some stellar actors (with the acceptation of some pretty bad accents), there were some let downs that took away from the chilling atmosphere of the show. I think it definitely requires an eventual second viewing however, because then you are able to spot potential foreshadowing and understand slightly convoluted plot points like Hannah Grove’s episode a little better as you already know the context.

If you have anything to add, please leave some ideas in the comments!

** I used an article from Screen Rant to help spot the hidden ghosts - it’s extremely useful!

https://screenrant.com/haunting-bly-manor-netflix-every-hidden-ghost/

#haunting of bly manor #netflix #haunting of hill house #tv #horror #ghost story #halloween #tv review #blog

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shadowed-dancer · 4 years

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Svtfoe Theory: The Butterflies in “Game of Flags”

For a while I’ve been thinking about the family we saw in the episode “Game of Flags” and I think I’ve come to an answer about how these people fit into the Butterfly family tree.

The issue mainly stems from the fact that the book of spells does a great job explaining the past queens of mewni, but not the past Butterfly FAMILY, meaning Queens may have had siblings we don’t know about. Either way, I’m going to give the most simple explanation for who these people are.

Before we start, I want to go over some information about magic and cheekmarks so we are all on the same page, ok? First, cheekmarks are the result of when someone is exposed to magic. When the Queens give birth, their children inherit the marks from the Queen’s exposure. All their children receive the marks, not just the heir. We see evidence of this in Crescenta’s chapter.

Crescenta wouldn’t have been heir in this photo, yet she still has cheekmarks from her mother’s exposure to magic.

Second, any child of the Queen gets cheekmarks. Specifically I’m talking about boys. The only boy in the book of spells is Jushtin, and while you could argue that he may have developed his clovers after receiving the wand (since we get no baby pictures) it is unlikely. He was the son of a powerful mother who was very exposed to magic.

Even if he did develop his cheekmarks some time after his birth, it is still proof that boys can get the marks if they use magic. Marco is also proof of this since he develops crescent moons after casting a spell (they go away later though, while Jushtin’s are present all the time).

The final part about cheekmarks requires some assumptions. I am working under the thought that if a Queen’s sibling has a child (meaning the niece or nephew of that Queen), that kid will not have the marks because their mom was never exposed to magic as thoroughly. There is no solid evidence for this, but judging by their own rules, it’s not impossible to believe.

If you want a more in depth analysis of why certain people have cheekmarks, check out my theory on that: here

Now that we’re on the same page, let’s get into the main point: who is the family in “Game of Flags”? The most obvious one is Etheria. Moon calls her “Aunt Etheria”, so we can assume she was Comet’s sister and Estrella’s younger daughter. She is never mentioned in Estrella’s chapter, but that probably is because Estrella’s chapter ends with a drawing of baby Comet, meaning Etheria was not even born. Also, notice she has star shaped cheekmarks.

As we just established, the children of the queen will always get cheekmarks. Estrella would absolutely pass this on to Etheria.

What about the others though? While we don’t get confirmation on who all the others are, Star calls the man “Uncle Heartrude”, but would that mean Moon had a brother? Not exactly. Notice his lack of cheekmarks. In fact, notice how none of them have cheekmarks.

If these people were other children of Comet, they would have gotten the marks as well, especially “Uncle Heartrude”. We established that boys can absolutely have cheekmarks, so why wouldn’t he?

Well, I suggest that these are the children of Etheria and the cousins of Moon. For one, notice how they all have the same eyes. Also notice the lack of cheekmarks. Etheria would have never been too exposed to magic, so her children would not have received cheekmarks. It would also explain why the very family-oriented Comet never brought up her other children (the hypothetical siblings of Moon). As a side note, it would still make sense for Star to call them aunts and uncles. My own family is proof of this, I call my mom’s cousin my aunt.

We can also apply this to the children Star sits with. Assuming these are children of the adults seen earlier, these would technically be Star’s second cousins. Notice how they don’t have cheekmarks either and all have Etheria’s (their grandmother’s) eyes.

Wait... that child in the back

No!!!! How can she have cheekmarks? She’s definitely not Star’s sister since River says in this episode that he and Moon only have one child (plus we absolutely would have seen if Star had a sibling at some point throughout the show) so who is she? All her potential parents at the grown up table have no cheekmarks, yet she does?! I have a somewhat convoluted explanation for this, you’ll just have to stick with me ok?

We’ve learned from flashbacks that baby Festivia never had cheekmarks and supposedly developed them as she was more exposed to magic.

What if the little blonde girl is simply more in tune with magic then her cousins and developed cheekmarks as a result of this. Perhaps magic exposure can skip a generation? Either way, Skywynne said something that caught my eye. She says "my son has great potential for magic! I can see it in his eyes”. Perhaps this child also has magic potential and this has manifested itself into cheekmarks? It’s difficult to say, I’d love to hear your theories on the topic!

(The other, more likely option, is that the production team simply didn’t think this far ahead. Maybe the original idea was that, yes, Heartrude was the brother of Moon, and male Butterflies simply didn’t get cheekmarks, and maybe the little girl was his daughter, but for me the fun is trying to put this in context with what we know now. Unfortunately, that can be kind of impossible is they were retconned out of their original roles)

Tl;dr the adult family members here are probably Etheria’s kids and Moon’s cousins.

Hope y’all enjoyed

#svtfoe #svtfoe theory #lmao this has been in my drafts for months #I think I wrote it in may #better late than never am I right #anyways yeah this annoys me

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trillhouse-lh · 5 years

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No trolling, legitimate question, why are you so against parent x kid stuff? Not saying your wrong or right, just curious.

Wasn’t sure if I should answer this one, since I don’t really want to trash anyone’s tastes and it’s not like I’m going to change anyone’s mind on the matter either way. But, I guess I may as well explain my view on it for the curious.

Personally, I compare sibling/sibling incest to childhood friends that end up falling for each other. But part of the appeal of loudcest, and incestuous shipping in general, is the inherently taboo nature of it. It’s almost universally considered immoral, unnatural and damn near everywhere simply engaging in it could result in prison time if discovered, potentially even for life. So to defy that in the name of one’s feelings, especially for the sake of love rather than meaningless smut, is pretty damn romantic. If you’re into that sort of thing, anyway.

But then there’s parent/child, and that’s where I hit my limit. For me, there is a big difference between someone you grew up WITH and the one who not only fathered, but ostensibly raised you. Even when the daughter is without question the initiator, the whole thing immediately gives the impression of child grooming at best and outright manipulation at worst. This is made worse by the fact that in many of the canons where this happens, at least from what I’ve seen, Lincoln had direct involvement in raising his children from the start. He raised them, he normalized it, and in most cases everyone else just enables it without so much as batting an eye. Doesn’t matter how casual it may be, it just comes across as creepy and damaging to Lincoln’s character, just as it would be if BJ or his brothers did the same with their own kids.

And that’s just the surface level stuff. There’s plenty of specific elements to these sorts of canons that don’t sit right with me. The fact that it’s often out in the open and nobody so much as voices their disapproval of the matter. The fact that it’s frequently at the expense of others’ feelings, or even outright NTR. The fact that justification is rarely given for why this happens, neither for why Lincoln would willingly have sex with his daughters nor why they would even be interested in him in the first place beyond “he has a big dick or whatever”. And yes, I know this is generalizing, and there ARE works that go into this, especially in the latin side of the fandom. Hell, some of them may even tell a damn good story in the process. But all too often it’s played completely shallow and presents the characters involved in a negative light, whether intentional or not. And yes, perhaps I’m expecting too much from what in many cases is just meaningless smut. I’ll flat out admit it bothers me far more than it should, which I suppose is due to becoming invested in these characters as a whole.

Isn’t exclusive to daddy/daughter either, I also don’t like mom/son even if it doesn’t actively disturb me in quite the same way. I even like joking about Lyle/Leni because, aside from being kind of funny, I feel his Oedipus complex is a defining and legitimately interesting part of his character. Doesn’t mean I’ll ever draw or write it, but I accept it. And I’ll also admit to a bit of a double standard, seeing as how I’m fine with uncle/niece and aunt/nephew, provided the pairing makes sense. Arguments could certainly be made that they’re comparable, and I can’t fully disagree with that. But they didn’t sire the kid, nor did they raise them. In many ways it carries the same appeal that I can only assume most would get from parent/child, but without the direct line of descendance and, as such, there’s a degree of separation there that can make it easier to swallow. The best of both worlds, so to speak. But, y’know, that’s just me.

Anyway, my apologies for how long-winded that all was. Tl;dr, I draw a distinction between a sibling you grow up alongside and a parent whose job is to raise and guide you, preferably NOT onto their dick. In my view it’s creepy and comes across as manipulative even in the best case scenario. But that’s just my opinion, you’re free to agree or disagree, and at the end of the day we’re all here to have fun regardless of what kind of content we’re into. So even if I disagree with it, I don’t judge those that do like it. I just won’t be doing any content of that type beyond my obligations with Strange Love.

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wolfpawn · 5 years

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Life is a Game of Risks, Chapter 29

Chapter Summary - Tom begins his Christmas shopping before having Alexianna and Lily over for the evening.

TRIGGERS - Past domestic abuse, Past emotional abuse, Past sexual abuse.

Previous Chapter

Tags: @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @theoneanna

Request if you wish to be tagged

Tom made sure no one of note saw him as he went into the toy store to get what was needed. He was present when Lily made her “Santa list” as well as other items that were shortlisted but scrapped as Alexianna had a firm rule, Lily could only ask Santa for three things. As a result, he knew what other things were on the list, Alexianna had said what was going to be from her, Daniel had given her money to get one from him as he would be working on the rig for Christmas, leaving Tom with the idea to get her the other item on the list.

It was the most expensive of the items on the list, but it was still extremely reasonably priced at a meagre sixty pounds, so he saw no issue. He ensured it was adequately concealed on his departure for fear that he was seen and Lily would find out what it was before Christmas.

He was right to be cautious, as there was indeed a few fans asking for photos as he made his way through the street back to his car, Lily’s present in hand. One or two made comments about the big Paw Patrol present bag, saying their kids/nieces/nephews were the same, others seemed less than impressed, but said nothing regards it.

With that done, he went about getting something for Alexianna. He wanted to get her something fancy or even extravagant. She was working hard, juggling their relationship, being a mother to Lily, her job and her schooling in some miraculous way. Tom often found himself wondering how she did it all. She assisted Lily with her learning to read and write, while also doing work and her own schooling. He sat watching as she had Lily on her lap colouring while she wrote a shopping list to get on the way home from work before collecting Lily from school the next day. She never put pressure on him, respecting his need to work and often space to deal with it. He knew she wore little jewellery, only a necklace she had gotten herself after Lily was born to signify the two of them, nothing else and he did not want to infringe on that. Then he considered a weekend away, just them, but he also knew she would be frantic about Lily, so he contacted Daniel to ask him when he would be back their direction, since he was certain the only one that she would permit take Lily for a night was her brother, but sadly, there was no way for him to tell just yet, as he had his own life in Scotland now, leaving Tom to try and figure out something. He thought of a gift voucher somewhere, but he was worried she would take that as a suggestion that what she had was not good enough. It was a minefield, and he was terrified of insulting her in one manner or another.

One thing Tom noticed was the sheer amount of women that now made up the inner circle of his life. Between his mother, his sisters, his niece, Alexianna and Lily, he was utterly surrounded. He had a few good male friends, but it was funny all the same how many women he had around him. As he bought the rest of his presents, he felt more confident of what to get her and proceeded to do so.

By the time he got everything done, he checked his watch and realised he was late getting home, having asked Alexianna and Lily over for the evening for dinner, with no time to cook, he thought it best to arrange a takeaway when he got there and texted Alexianna to tell her he was slightly delayed.

When he got to the house, he was smiling, having just passed Alexianna and Lily, who were a mere few houses away making their way to his home. ‘Good evening, ladies.’

‘Hi, Tom.’ Lily giggled. ‘You’re so silly.’

‘Good, that means I am making you laugh.’ Tom smiled, cuddling her as she rushed to him. When she pulled back, her mother came into his view more. ‘Hi.’ He looked at her in concern. ‘Are you…?’

‘I’m fine.’ She dismissed, though it was clear something was bothering her. He had spoken to her earlier in the day and everything seemed fine, so whatever it was more than likely occurred in the afternoon sometime. But he knew she never wanted to share her worries too much, be it because she was scared that she would frighten him off or because she did not want to let Lily realise something was bothering her, but either way, she was refusing to say anymore. ‘Good afternoon?’

‘Busy, I had to get a few things sorted.’ He smiled, his glance going to the car or a moment. ‘I did not get a chance to cook, so what about a pizza for dinner?’

‘Can you have one?’ Alexianna asked worriedly, knowing that Tom’s diet was restricted by his job.

‘So long as I do not stuff myself to beyond normal.’ He smiled, putting his arm around her and giving her a small kiss.

In the time since their trip to Suffolk, Alexianna had become slightly more lenient with what Lily saw between them. She had seemingly watched Jack and Emma’s interactions, as well as Sarah and Yakov’s around Lily and indeed Sophie to gauge what would be deemed an acceptable level of interaction between adults in a relationship. It was hard for her because part of her was saying it was not right. There had been an argument as a result of her shying away from Tom with Lily present. Tom stating that such actions implied to Lily that there was a reason for Alexianna to shy away from him and in turn, that he was someone to worry about. Alexianna was forced to concede that it was true and allowed some contact, a kiss or a hug be visible in front of Lily, something Tom and Emma on another occasion, insisted would teach Lily what healthy and good adult relationships looked like, and would set her up with what to expect when she was older. Though Alexianna was none too pleased at considering her daughter as a teenager with a partner, she accepted it was true and that she needed to be more understanding of it.

‘When she is gone to bed, will you tell me what is bothering you?’

‘I am just tired, Tom.’ She dismissed again.

‘Lexi?’ She could not look him in the eye for a moment, and when she did, he could see there was indeed something bothering her. ‘Please.’

‘I just am worn out today, and then someone made a stupid comment.’ She explained.

‘Okay, thank you, Darling.’ He kissed her again. ‘We will talk more later, alright?’

She nodded slightly. ‘So long as I do not render unconscious after my food.’ She smiled. ‘Where will we order from?’ She smiled, feeling somewhat better having confessed some of her woes to Tom, and wanting to be happy around Lily.

Grateful to have gotten her to open up slightly, Tom smiled too, amazed at the lengths Alexianna was willing to go to to ensure Lily had a happy home environment, even if all she wanted to do was crawl in a corner and remain there. ‘Dominos?’

Alexianna scoffed slightly, ‘That is hardly fine dining.’

‘I never said we were going to do such.’ Tom grinned. ‘Are you against it?’

‘Hell, no. I am all for it.’

‘Then don’t complain about a delicious dinner,’ He chuckled.

‘Meateor for me please, tomato base, not barbeque.’ Alexianna asked. ‘And Madame will have some of mine.’

‘Okay, and sides?’ Tom took note.

‘As long as there are wedges, we’re happy.’

‘I will organise that, you get Lily sorted.’ Tom gently rubbed her arm in a show of affection before Alexianna did as he suggested.

With the food eaten and Tom brought up to date on Lily’s life, courtesy of an enthusiastic Lily, she was finally ushered to bed, with Tom as her storyteller, as often happened when they stayed at his before Alexianna and Tom were left to an evening to themselves again.

‘How about we sit down and watch a film?’ Tom suggested as he wrapped his arms around her waist as Alexianna dried the last of the dishes.

‘In a minute, I just want to sort these.’ She leant into his embrace.

‘What’s wrong, tell me.’ He pleased, wanting her to feel better.

She considered not telling him for a moment before conceding that he would probably badger her until she told him. ‘I am getting comments, at work, and at college.’

‘About us?’ She nodded. ‘And?’

‘I knew it would happen, but what they are saying, who thinks it’s okay to go up to a person and say these things? Do you remember when we were growing up, you never dared to speak to people like that?’

‘It is the modern-day, people overuse social media and hide behind little icons on a screen and say all sorts of things that they always thought but knew to never say in public, or else they enjoy the reaction and attention they get from saying these horrible things and then forget that they are no longer behind the onscreen persona, or indeed forget that this not acceptable human interaction or that their right to say what they want excuses them from ramifications.’ Tom explained, pulling her close to him. ‘So, what are they jabbering about. You sleeping with me to get ahead? You’re using me in some other way.’

‘Among other things. I think the words “Sugar Daddy” were used at some point.’

Tom shook his head with a look of distaste on his face. ‘It makes me sound old.’

‘The other is that Lily is yours.’

‘We had those accusations a few times now, that is hardly the most insulting, is it?’ He was unsure whether or not he should be insulted

‘No, that one doesn’t tend to bother me, I mean,’ She smiled slightly. ‘Of all the men to be her father, I wish you were a candidate.’

‘Then what about it?’ She looked at her hands. ‘Lexi?’

‘Apparently, I am punishing you, for the whole Taylor Swift thing, and you are being forced to take me back and I am holding you to ransom with our daughter. I should just stop being vindictive, that you deserve a decent woman, that I was jealous of Swift and that is why I forced your break up.’ She stated, her voice low as she recalled the nasty words she had been forced to listen to. ‘I wanted to tell her to go fuck herself, but...she was actually an employee there, and if I went off on her….’

‘You look bad and get punished,’ Tom nodded, understandingly. ‘I am so sorry, Lexi.’

‘You did nothing wrong.’

‘No, but you are working so hard, for you and Lily and my part in this is why people are being like this to you, you don’t deserve it.’

‘It’s just hard because to give the same back, I am bringing myself, and in turn us down.’

‘“Us”?’

‘Well, yes. I mean, it doesn’t say much for us if I am acting like someone from Shameless, screaming at people like trash.’

‘No,’ Tom agreed, kissing the top of her head. ‘Thank you for keeping your cool.’

‘Well, I would be trying for the wrong career if I could not keep my cool.’ She laughed.

Tom chuckled. ‘That’s true.’ He kissed her again. ‘I got Lily’s Christmas present today.’

‘Tom, don’t be worrying about things like that.’

‘Hey, you said I am allowed get her something at Christmas. I love spoiling Sophie and I want to spoil Lily when I am allowed to, so please.’

‘I just don’t want you to feel like we want things from you.’

‘I don’t think that. I think you both deserve nice things.’

‘Please Tom, I don’t want anything off you.’

‘I know, that is why I want to give you something because you don’t expect it. You were always like that, I remember you giving out to Emma.’

‘Those were Spice Girls tickets, completely over the top.’

‘You went though.’

‘It was the Spice Girls, of course, I went, I am not an idiot.’ Alexianna laughed before smiling at the memory. ‘It was so much fun.’

‘I still cannot Mum let Sarah take you both.’

‘We were eleven and Sarah was eighteen and we were well behaved. You on the other hand….’

‘We won’t talk about me.’

‘And your little stunt with the Drama club and getting drunk when….’

‘You know way too much.’ Tom commented.

‘Sounds like a threat when you say it like that.’ Alexianna laughed.

‘Come on, let’s relax.’

#Life is a Game of Risks #chapter 29 #tom hiddleston fic #tom hiddleston

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bioticgoddess · 5 years

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Endgame: Opinions/Analysis

Spoilers ahead - under the cut- so read at your own risk.

The movie was good. I may not agree with how we go to the end of some of the Avenger’s stories but it was done well. Let's being.

Putting to stones back didn't undo Nat's death, I don’t think it could have without hurting her, not without changing her on some fundamental level. She went willingly into that void as much as Clint. She sacrificed herself not for him but for the avengers and her adoptive Barton niece and nephews. She died to protect her family as much as Clint was willing to. She was fraying, coming apart at the ends in a way that is keenly familiar to me. Yes, she found a family with the Avengers but that was the only family she found. Yes, she lost the opportunity to build anything beyond 2023 with that or any family. But that's okay. Sometimes you don't get more than a few years and your protect it vehemently. She did. She weighed the needs of the many against those of the few and wouldn't let her oldest/best friend join those numbers. I doubt she wanted to entertain the conversation with Laura about Clint sacrificing himself for this. For them. So she did what she does, she read the situation and made a play. She was the better spy, the better hero that day. I was reminded that because Wanda’s powers came from the mind stone, she may have a link to the Soul Stone so she has some awareness of that stone’s pocket reality. (So “Force Ghost” Nat and original MCU Gamora. Maybe?)

Tony got a happy ending. Or at least part of one. He was always going to be our Martyr. That's just MCU/RDJ Tony. It's his MO. He was always going to be the one we lost tragically, no matter how Endgame went. He got to flip out and call Cap on his bullshit from AOU and how he knew this would happen. He and Pepper have their Morgan and gods do I hope she makes appearances or is at least referenced going forward. But in the end, Tony did it all of this for HER and for PETER. These are his kids. He couldn't protect one but he'd be damned if he wasn't going to be there for the other right until he was given the chance to fix things from 2018. His death hurt me most because your spouse dying is one of if not the most stressful events that can happen to a person (so sayeth science). It's an inevitability and Pepper knew from Iron Man 1, the start of all this, that he could probably die out there. She's called him on in and cautioned him to be careful more times than I can count. He seldom heeded her warnings.

Thor blamed himself for everything that happened: Frigga’s death, Hela’s return and the inevitable destruction of Asgard, the losses in Infinity War, and those at the beginning of Endgame. It didn’t matter that destroying the planet of Asgard meant saving the people. He lost. He was their monarch and he failed to protect them in the ways he was expected to. Then Thanos showed up and cost him half the remaining people. The losses that day included at least one of his best friends & most trusted advisers (Heimdall) and Loki, the brother with whom he’d only JUST reconciled. The only way he wasn’t going to be the drunk we saw (or some variation thereof because survivor’s guilt manifests in different ways) was if he’d taken Thanos’ life before the snap. That was it. He’d still be dealing with Survivor’s Guilt, no doubt, but if he had at last avenged the assault on their refugee ship and saved everyone else from the snap. His going off to join the Guardians was fitting in that he’s not a ruler, not like he thought or was told he’d be. So he’s going back to what he knows, what he does best, and doing the things he does best - saving people.

Why not reverse the last 5 Years with the time travel heist/plot? What about all the time travel and Steve living a life with Peggy? Well, I’m gonna quote Doctor Who��“it’s a great big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey...stuff.” The movie ctually established the MCU’s time travel rules through Banner Hulk and The Ancient One. First, they couldn’t change their memories or pasts. So STeve staying in the post WW2 era with Peggy doesn’t or can’t affect anything we saw in the movies. Bucky stayed in the present, so he’s the same Bucky. Loki snagged the Tesseract and BAMF’ed out so, as someone else posited, he’s probably something similar to his TDW self. Second, changes to the past would only result in branching timelines an d alternate realities. The current MCU timeline’s “present” is still likely that new/central timeline only Old-Man Rogers (Old Man Carter eheh) knew the future and he knew to stay ahead of his younger self. How uncomfortable would that conversation be? Third, things are inevitable as a result. Thanos’s 2018 assault: Inevitable. The fates of all our beloved characters: Inevitable. Bucky staying in the 2023 present as a physically 30 year old: Inevitable.

Now, I put the basic time travel overhaul up there because Steve’s whole ending is time travel. This video from ScreenCrush explains it better than I can. So I’ll hop onto the psych explanation since that’s more my jam than quantum physics. We all HEARD him say he’d moved on at the end of AOU. He told Tony as much. Then he got Bucky back in CW only to lose him again to both cryo and Thanos. During time travel he sees Peggy, who he’s definitely not let go of and never will, only to lose her a third time the second he and Tony are back in the present. He’s been broken and had to put himself together in new and interesting ways emotionally multiple times over the decade of the MCU. Like Thor, he’s likely suffering from survivor’s guilt and PTSD. With everything he’s been through it would impossible for him not to be. Unlike Thor, and I suspect even unlike Bucky, he never really found a home in the modern world. Bucky had Wakanda and was reluctant to leave his little farm to fight except that he was duty bound. Steve wanted the kind of life that Tony got to have with Pepper. Only he wanted it with Peggy. By the end of Endgame, he’d finally found a way to achieve that when he returned the stones and TDW Mjolnir to their original places in time.

I’m not going to launch into the arguments for/against him and Peggy, the internet and Tumblr in particular have done enough of that. The video I linked above also explains how he got to have both lives and still follow the rules put forth for Time Travel in the MCU by suggesting that his timeline with her was a branch and so never interacted or impacted the one we know prior. If I had been in Steve’s position, I can’t say I wouldn’t have gone back in time and risked my life to stay with the person I love.

Bucky’s the last person I’m gonna touch on. There was no way that he didn’t either know or suspect that Steve was going to stay back in time. For all know they had a conversation about it prior, even if it was one of those “so Hypothetically speaking what would you do if I stayed in the past with Peggy”. any conversation they may have had about him saving Bucky sooner would have probably included some mention of Sam and, I suspect, how Steve needs him to guide/keep an eye on his successor. It could have even included the same lecture(s) from Bruce Hulk and the Ancient One about branching timelines. Bucky needs to stay in the present because he fits there better than Steve did and he’s the link that Old Man Rogers-Carter is going to rely on to look after the others.

By this point I realize I’m talking in circles but I’m trying to look at the film in the context of what happened and how it ties into the rest of the MCU as opposed to what I as a fan would have wanted to change. Like somehow getting Nat back. Or maybe the Loki Outside Time showing up during that final fight to throw a knife or two at 2014 Thanos. Maybe a tie in to that video of middle-aged Peggy talking about her husband and kids where Steve is sitting another room, looking enough not like himself that the camera crew never bothers him. Something like that. Have Tony live somehow and just be the brains behind the team even if he couldn’t fight. And so on.

#avengers endgame #avengers endgame spoilers #avengers #captain america #bucky barnes #winter soldier #steve rogers #hulk #bruce banner #natasha romanoff #black widow #hawkeye #clint barton #peggy carter #ant-man #thanos #infinity stones

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purrincess-chat · 6 years

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You're absolutely right lol why is it that the main female is always expected to grow and take responsibility for her emotions, even when she’s not at all in the wrong but when the guy is acting up it's cuz of his "man pain" and any bad behavior isn’t his fault and he’s immediately emphasized with. Because, oh, all of his wrong doings are the reflection of the world’s, not him. This “girls are flawed for having emotions and boys are not” trope is annoying and not at all a good message for girls

So, I’ve put off commenting on all of this for a few days because I wanted to see what other things came out of it and take time to stew over my opinions and give Thomas a chance to potentially explain himself further. Gonna include a bulk of this under the cut because I don’t know how long it will be. It’s just gonna be a mixture of me rambling about my thoughts and being a little salty. Not too much I don’t think, I dunno we’ll see when we get there. (spoiler I get kind of salty… and by kind of I mean a lot)

For anyone who doesn’t know what this refers to, a few days ago someone asked Thomas on Twitter what he considered to be Adrien and Marinette’s biggest flaws to which he replied that Marinette has “poor control of her emotions” and that “Adrien is perfect. But his flaw comes from the fact he’s not accustomed to the “ outside” world. His innocence makes him vulnerable. To sum it up: he’ s not flawed. The world is.”

This did not sit very well with fans who are already not too pleased with Thomas and his treatment of certain characters, for good reason. It does come off as misogynistic, and even if he is just trolling and not being serious, why does he want to troll in such a way that he comes off as misogynistic when he’s supposed to be writing a cartoon that empowers girls? Salt under the cut: (seriously, the Dead Sea ain’t got nothing on this salt)

For me, this didn’t surprise me too much because Thomas has always spouted shit and come off as extremely rude and belittling to fans even if they aren’t doing anything wrong or being aggressive, i.e. this fan who just asked him for his opinions, not even asking for spoilers, and who genuinely wanted to chat with him about his show. I could write novels about how un-progressive this show is and all of the unconscious misogyny that’s in it, which Thomas will deny wholeheartedly, and actually did in this same thread. I don’t know whether or not he genuinely doesn’t realize that his episodes are riddled with internalized misogyny or if he just doesn’t care? Because many times throughout both s1 and s2, male characters acting problematically have been glazed over, and not just in Adrien’s case, whereas females, typically Marinette, get a much harsher treatment when shown in similar circumstances. Females (Marinette) are often made out to apologize for other characters wrongs and their actions are blown way out of proportion when they do even the tiniest thing wrong.

Take Glaciator, for example: Ladybug tells Chat straight up that she probably won’t make it because she already has other plans. Chat still gets his hopes up and believes she will come which that in and of itself isn’t necessarily wrong, but when she doesn’t show up, which he knew she might and was even reminded by Plagg that she didn’t say yes, gets angry and throws a temper tantrum at her for not showing up when she told him from the beginning that she probably wouldn’t. And then SHE has to apologize to him sincerely and practically plead with him for forgiveness and in turn all she gets is a *shrug* Sorry. Maybe next time. What is the message you are hoping to convey with this, Thomas? “Women should be more decisive when giving men answers?” We aren’t fucking psychics. She didn’t know how her evening was going to play out and if she’d have time to show up. “She didn’t say no.” Yeah, but not saying no isn’t automatically a yes. That’s how most men get convicted of rape. Didn’t say no =/= yes. “I really wanted you to show up and when you didn’t that hurt my man feelings because you didn’t say no, so I got my little hopes up.” Cry me a river. Really couldn’t care less. Like real talk, if a man ever pulled that shit on me I’d block his ass to hell. If I explicitly state that I probably won’t make it, and then some asshole gets upset when I definitely do not just because I didn’t say no? Bitch, bye??? You are not entitled to my time, and if that’s the attitude you’re going to have then you are not worth my time. But ohhh Chat is such a sad, pouty cinnamon roll whose daddy doesn’t love him enough to eat dinner with him, boo-hoo.

Not to mention at the end when Ladybug tells him they can’t be together for very legit reasons like, um, the safety of everyone they care about, Adrien is just like *sigh* I’ll just keep hoping. Like bitch she rejected you. Move on. That exact mindset of “if I keep trying maybe she’ll eventually love me back” is exactly why women feel unsafe to walk the streets at night because men feel like if they keep pestering women that eventually they’ll see the error of their ways. Which just no. That’s obsessive as fuck and men often get really violent with women when they eventually don’t like them back. (not saying that Adrien would, he’d probably just throw another hissy fit and take off his ring) But this show is aimed at children, and that’s not a good message to teach boys who are not Adrien and won’t necessarily react the way Adrien did. If a girl rejects you, move the fuck on. She doesn’t owe you shit just because you like her, and your continued advances will likely only make her uncomfortable and less inclined to like you back. Reminds me of a post I’ve seen where someone’s teenage nephew talks about how a girl rejected him, and when the aunt asks him what he’s gonna do he says “keep trying” and she’s like bitch, no. Leave her alone, and it blows his fucking mind. Men are constantly reinforced on this “keep trying until she says yes” mindset, and it’s honestly why violence against women is so prevalent. Because manbabies never get told that women don’t owe them affection or sex or whatever the fuck they want. And you know when a good time to teach them how to respect a woman’s boundaries is? When they’re children.

“But I was talking about Adrien, not Chat Noir.” Yes. Thomas actually legit separates the two in this instance. I’m not making it up. Mr. Ship Wars are stupid because Adrien and Chat are the same person has separated the two as not the same person. It doesn’t matter if they’re “treated differently”. Chat’s flaws are Adrien’s flaws and vice versa. They’re both petty and jealous. (And, no, Adrien defense squad, I don’t hate him as a character or even think he’s a bad person. Recognizing character flaws isn’t the same as hating. Unclench)

This isn’t a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde situation where the two halves function separately and have no recollection afterward. Taking off the mask doesn’t suddenly make all of those flaws disappear. It also doesn’t make sense based on his earlier reasoning that “Adrien doesn’t know how the world works” does that mean Chat fucking does? Shouldn’t Chat be excused from his wrongdoings by that logic because he also doesn’t know how the world works and is just as naive as Adrien? You can’t say one identity is perfect while the other is flawed. People don’t work that way. Characterization doesn’t work that way. A character is still inherently the same character regardless of whether or not they’re secretly a superhero. Superman is still Superman regardless of whether or not he’s got his fucking glasses on. Hell, a whole plot point in Antibug was that Marinette is a hero with or without her mask. Don’t pull this bullshit, Thomas. It’s not believable, and you haven’t supported it in canon. In fact, you’ve unsupported it in canon.

“Ladybug and Chat Noir are supposed to represent yin/yang.” Okay, yes, that’s a motif we’ve picked up on like since episode 1. Cool, but still doesn’t make up for shitty characterization. “I have a personal theory” okay, cool motive, but still shittily executed. Your personality doesn’t magically fucking change just because you’re in a new situation. Who you are as a person is constant. Your reaction might change as a result of the circumstances you find yourself in, but who you are does not just change because you put on a mask. Someone who knows fuck all about the world doesn’t suddenly learn how to function just because he gets superpowers. “People are constantly fluctuating” please, do the world a favor, and take a class in personality. That’s not even an insult. Like there are literally classes out there that teach about how personality works. I’ve taken them, so I know they exist.

I’ve also mentioned before that I’m not a fan of Thomas’s whole “puzzle-piece” plot line because it doesn’t fucking make sense. Like I could be okay with it, if it made sense, but it doesn’t fucking make sense. It’s like he dumped 6 puzzles together and told the audience “here, figure it out” and like that’s exhausting. If I wanted to build a puzzle, I’d go build one (assuming my cat doesn’t absolutely destroy it). And if I as an adult have problems keeping up with your plot and character development (which is only present if you squint) what makes you think a child can keep up with it? My niece who just turned 9 calls your shit out for not adding up. Don’t say kids don’t notice or care. Cause if you give them good media to consume, they notice when something is bad. Seek to raise kid’s standards of what a good show looks like. Don’t use them as a crutch to be lazy.

“Plot driven kids shows don’t do well.” Um, bitch wanna give some examples? Cause I can give some examples of many beloved childhood shows of mine that have a cohesive plot. ATLA, for example. Everyone fucking loves it. MLP is another one I enjoy which does still have “lesson of the day” set-up but at least those lessons come into play later?? Like I think it was s4 or s5 where they all got some friendship object that ended up being a key later in the finale. So all of those episodes then had a purpose outside of the token friendship lesson of the day. Didn’t particularly matter what order you saw those episodes in for the most part, but you could see a progression of the characters and plot the whole time. You knew things were important to the overall plot of the season, and the development of those characters actually sticks around for more than just that episode. Kids can handle shit. Look at the latest Incredibles movie. I never once had trouble keeping up as a kid when watching plot driven shows. Not once. Saying it’s a kids show is a cop out. It’s an excuse, and a bad one at that. And that’s not even to say that the other things I listed are perfect either. They have their problems, but they dull in comparison.

Thomas also tried to boast some shit about how they show guys and girls being akumatized and emotional equally, and I’m like we’re not talking about background people, Tommy. We’re talking about your leads and how unbalanced they are and how you hold one to a higher condemnation than the other. Because one has daddy issues and conveniently happens to coincidentally be a boy. But he gets a free pass because he’s sheltered. Yes, and who made him so sheltered, Tommy? Who made that executive decision? Who decided to give him all of these excuses for his behavior? Who in turn decided to make everything the girl does her fault even if she’s right? Who also calls himself “Hawkmoth,” (and has always used the nickname Hawkdaddy) a villain established to be a neglectful, emotionally abusive, and controlling father bent on something that isn’t entirely clear and willing to allow his son to be in danger multiple times to achieve that something, meanwhile two teenage girls are the worst things you could think of because they’re bratty and they lie, and anyone who sympathizes with them are just fooled by their good looks? Cool. #female empowerment, am I right?

Honestly, I could dissect every single thing Thomas said throughout this discourse but truthfully it’s tiring, annoying, and frankly he contradicts himself way too much I could just write a book if I actually cared enough about him. At this point things that he says doesn’t really surprise me anymore because I’ve just accepted that he’s got loads of internalized misogyny, borderline narcissism, and just overall isn’t worth anyone’s time. Bitching at him is never going to change his mind because he doesn’t believe he’s done anything wrong. It’s why I say that Adrien is his self-insert OC. He’s a perfect little golden boy who never does anything wrong, and if he does, it’s the world’s fault, not his. Sounds a lot like how Thomas approaches anyone who tells him what they understood from his writing because it’s fucking there whether he realizes it or not.

(Tl;dr I guess) My advice to anyone who read this far is this: Ignore the fuck out of Thomas because he’s always gonna be a piece of shit who doesn’t care if you think he’s a piece of shit and actually seems to enjoy people thinking he’s a piece of shit. Lower your expectations for the writing of this show tremendously, basically only subscribe to it for cute interactions every once in a while, and you’ll enjoy it. If you are here for detailed plot or good character development, might I suggest rewatching ATLA? Basically, expect nothing from this show, and you’ll never be disappointed. It’s what I’ve started doing because this ^^^^ is what happens when you pick it apart. And there’s a lot that I left out for time’s sake and because I don’t want to look at this man’s Twitter anymore. I have a migraine.

#salt #like a lot of salt #cat replies

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amorremanet · 7 years

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Hiya ! Super late but : 5+ headcanon thingy about...voltron college au if you wanna ? :)

aksfkgdfgh, I did mean to get back to this yesterday, but I got distracted writing and watching House reruns (but the, “give me an AU and I give you 5+ headcanons about it” meme is basically always open, because I am always good to go on AU headcanons)

idk whether to go with the college AU side of the fic that’s actually updating on AO3 or the one college AU that has Hunk/Keith/Lance, Matt/Shiro, Allura/Shay, and Lotor being a pain in the ass because Shiro doesn’t want to date him (and for multiple other reasons, but Shiro not wanting to date him is a big one) — so heck, let’s do both

the AU that doesn’t have a fic at present

Shiro has spent two separate Christmases in the hospital for one reason or another. The first one was when he was in high school: he was working out too hard without actually taking care of himself, putting way too much stress on himself about literally everything (from being allowed to play varsity lacrosse as a sophomore to worrying about his PSAT scores to trying to handle Keith’s first crush for him when Keith literally didn’t ask and just wanted to talk to Shiro about it because he was 13 and didn’t think the guy he liked knew he existed), and after seriously exhausting himself and throwing his electrolytes way, waaay off, Shiro passed out.

The second time was during his sophomore year of uni, and Shiro was so certain that he just had a nasty cold but actually, he was down with pneumonia. And as it turns out, stress from finals week, not eating right, and trying to keep to the same gym schedule that you have when you’re healthy? Not the way to handle pneumonia.

That first time is also the reason why Shiro first started visiting his and Keith’s therapist in a capacity other than, “Shiro had to escort Keith to make sure he got to the appointment and Keith asked him to come into the office too (or possibly emotionally manipulated him into it, maybe both)”

There is probably a 95% chance that Pidge will find a stray cat and try to hide it in her dorm room, despite all of the, “no, you may not have pets in your dorm; exceptions can be negotiated about for disabled students but the rest of you are not allowed to have pets, get over it” rules

When Allura finds out, there’s like a 65% chance that she just won’t report anything as part of an awkward attempt to befriend Pidge

When Hunk/Keith/Lance actually sort out the polyamory thing, Keith is going to want to tell Shiro immediately. The only reason they won’t is that Lance doesn’t believe that Keith can successfully tell Shiro about this by using a Parks and Rec meme — but “successfully” here means, “telling Shiro the thing AND getting him to say the line that is a response to said meme.”

So, they go to Shiro’s room and Keith is all, “This is my boyfriend Hunk and this is Hunk’s boyfriend Lance.”

“Sorry… what’s the situation?” Shiro plays along because he knows that sometimes, you just have to let Keith communicate through borrowed words.

“Hunk is bi and he’s into me, and he’s also into Lance, and Lance is really into Hunk, and I don’t actually hate Lance.”

Hunk: “It’s not that complicated :)”

Shiro: “Okay, but seriously, what is the situation”

Keith: “I’ll tell you everything but only if you say the other thing”

Shiro: “*siiiiiiiiiiiiiighs* …The thing about youth culture is: I don’t understand it”

and then Lance, Keith, and Hunk celebrate because haaaa, Shiro said the thing

Lance really doesn’t mean to be an asshole, most of the time. Like, okay, yes, sometimes, he DOES mean to be kind of an asshole — for instance, when The Paladins get beaten at ultimate frisbee Lotor, Acxa, Zethrid, Ezor, Narti, and Lotor’s coterie of overly similar frat-bro bodyguards, and Lance feels like Lotor definitely cheated somehow despite the complete lack of evidence, so he starts cussing Lotor out and accusing him and the gals of cheating

—but most of the time, Lance just doesn’t really know what to do with his feelings. Especially when a lot of them are things like, “All of the pressure he’s putting on himself to succeed and do well because all his older siblings are awesome and he doesn’t know what he’s good at like they’re good at stuff”

and, “All of his little nieces and nephews look up to Cool Uncle Lance and he wants to be a good role model, and he doesn’t want to let them down and doesn’t realize that the tiny humans love him regardless of how he does at school or what a loser he feels like he is and about the only way that he could ever let them down is if he promised them something and then didn’t deliver on it”

and, “Lance knew that it was going to be hard to leave home and go to school, and he thought maybe it’d be easier because he and Hunk were going to the same place so at least he’d have his best friend — but then he had to room with Keith instead of Hunk, and Keith is THE WORST, but Hunk actually kinda likes Keith and Keith sucks at flirting and Lance feels like he has no right to feel jealous because obviously he’s not in love with Hunk or anything don’t be stupid they’re just best friends and Hunk probably wouldn’t want to be with Lance anyway, and oh god why does everything hurt”

—all of which sort of boils over into Lance crying on Shiro’s shoulder when Shiro tries to sit him down in the Cool RA Single for a Talk about how he and Keith’s mutual antagonism has been steadily escalating (and the whole, “let’s sit all three of us down and hash out your differences and make a plan to handle this” idea went over like a lead balloon because Keith and Lance were both on the defensive, so nothing got discussed in a constructive fashion)

Granted, Lance was on the defensive during the one-on-one chat too, but mostly because he assumed that Shiro was going to take Keith’s side in this by default because they have history together and apparently Hunk is going out with Keith on Friday night so why wouldn’t Shiro take Keith’s side, too

This boiling over of emotion ends with Shiro feeling like he is in way over his head about trying to get Keith and Lance to just…… not even, “get them to be friends,” but, “get them to please stop it with deliberately antagonizing each other, for the love of god, please”

—but also with him going, “Okay, I’m not saying that you need to go to therapy or talk to me about your problems or anything? But if you want to talk to someone, there’s no shame in doing that and it can help a lot, if you let it”

—which in turn results in Lance hugging him tighter and crying a bit more (at least in the short term)

I mean, look, things will get better after this but Lancey-Lance has a LOT of pent-up emotions and Shiro gives nice hugs and says that he doesn’t care about people crying up his shirts, so. We’ll get to an okay place, but Lance has to cry it out first.

Shiro is the only person who doesn’t think the, “world’s okayest dad” mug that Lance and Hunk got him for Christmas is hilarious. He is NOT anybody’s father. Big brother figure — okay, sure, he can deal with that, but he isn’t anybody’s dad, will you please stop calling him that, saying things like, “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” doesn’t make him any shade of paternal okay.

I mean, he drinks out of the mug anyway because coffee is coffee and as long as the coffee gets into his mouth safely, Shiro doesn’t mind what its container looks like. But still. He’s not your dad.

Everyone else still thinks the mug is hilarious, though (well, okay, Keith thought it was funny for a little bit and has since gotten over it, and Pidge only thought that it was mildly amusing and now she wishes that everyone would just shut up about it).

But yes, they get that Shiro isn’t literally anybody’s dad and that strictly speaking, he is more of an older brother figure than a dad — it’s just that nobody makes, “world’s okayest brother” mugs as far as they know, and Shiro still does things like the whole, “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” thing until he tries to put conscious effort into NOT doing them (and even then, he still does them)

So, if you ask anyone but Shiro (and Keith and Pidge), that mug is hilarious

the tall, smart, good-looking AU

Shay organized an anti-M//ilo Y//iannopoulous protest back in February because Dean Zarkon was going to let that fucker come to campus and speak. It didn’t turn into full-scale riots like the protests out at UC Berkeley, but there was nevertheless resistance from the student conservative groups, and although the “presentation” was sparsely attended, it also wasn’t canceled like Shay was hoping to get.

Keith thinks that this is a perfectly interesting story about things that actually matter and doesn’t get why the other people in his creative nonfiction class with Dr. Ryner think he should skip writing In Cold Blood!Capote-inspired reportage about the protested and instead write a fucking BuzzFeed Lives piece about how he had this one abusive douchebag foster grandfather who got bitten by a Texas coral snake and died and it was the best day ever

Kolivan is head of the history department. He’s married to Antok, who is also a history professor, and they have a dog called Rufus. They’ve been calling their relationship status, “married” since 1997 (and they’ve been legally married since 2004, when they took advantage of the ruling in Goodridge v. Department of Public Health to make if official). Here is essentially how their proposal went:

Antok: “The only reason you’re trying to pull away is because you’re too scared to marry me!”

Kolivan: “I am absolutely not scared of anything, I LOVE you! If you truly meant the proposal, then you would stand behind your alleged convictions, so I can only conclude that YOU are too scared to let yourself marry ME and are projecting your insecurities because—”

Antok: “WHY WOULD I PROPOSE AT ALL IF I DIDN’T MEAN IT”

Kolivan: “I DON’T KNOW EVERYTHING DO I LOOK PSYCHIC TO YOU”

Antok: “WHAT DOES A PSYCHIC EVEN LOOK LIKE”

Kolivan: “YOU SAID YOU’D GIVE ME TIME TO THINK IT OVER”

Antok: “YEAH. I AGREED TO A WEEK. YOU’VE HAD THREE. JUST ADMIT IT, YOU ARE TOO DAMN SCARED TO MARRY ME”

Kolivan: “I AM NOT SCARED, I’LL MARRY THE SHIT OUT OF YOU RIGHT NOW”

Antok: “OH YEAH? PROVE IT”

Kolivan: “FINE I WILL *fumbles about trying to put on Antok’s engagement ring and refuses help until he finally gets it right by himself* …There! ……Uh, do you know any jewelers that are open right now or would a Ring-Pop from the bodega on the corner be an acceptable stand-in until morning”

—at least they didn’t have to do that again in 2004. Antok just got home really late on the day the ruling was announced (because he’d had an unexpected hospital visit and had hung around to see if his sister would need him and Kolivan to watch her kids for the night) — which she didn’t, in the end, but it still took a while to decide that it was all okay and he called to say that he’d be late but couldn’t keep up as much as he wanted because cellphones circa 2004……

So, when Antok got home, he found Kolivan asleep on the kitchen table, surrounded by a dinner that had gotten cold, a cake he’d made himself, balloons that seemed totally out-of-place in proximity to Kolivan, one of Antok’s scented candles (which had burned down enough that it was like five minutes from setting off their smoke alarm), and a Ring-Pop because he thought it would be a fun callback to their original proposal

(I mean, Kolivan also had another ring to give his husband and had successfully kept it under-wraps for three weeks because he usually doesn’t let himself hope so much — he would tell you that he always hopes for the best but experience, unfortunately, tells him to expect the worst [and if you get that this is a reference to Deep Space 9, you are Kolivan’s friend now] — but he was incredibly, unusually hopeful about how the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court would ultimately rule in Goodridge v. Department of Public Health)

Anyway, this was all so sweet that Antok just…… didn’t wake his husband up until after he’d gotten his camera and taken a picture for posterity’s sake

—and yet, they still periodically have incidents like, “Antok comes and interrupts Kolivan’s class for, ‘serious department business’ that is actually more like, ‘personal issues that are significant but could have waited until after class’ and Kolivan proceeds to spend seven minutes telling his students about why intra-Departmental romances are a bad idea”

or, “Kolivan forgets his own birthday again and, the next day, Antok starts off his class by calling some historical figure an idiot and yeah okay, maybe it sounds like he’s just picking on Napoleon in order to break down the whole, ‘Seeing these historical personages as Huge Important People, rather than as actual human beings, which in turn makes your scholarship less reliable’ thing… but then he gets to the part like, ‘I mean, if you think about it, Joséphine de Beauharnais probably only had her alleged affairs, if she did indeed have them, because Napoleon was a buffoon who was too absorbed in his work to remember his own birthday after she worked so hard to make it nice for him’ and everybody is just like, ‘oh jeez Kolivan really screwed up this time, didn’t he’“

But their dramatics aside, they eventually calm down, talk, and work it out every time because okay yes, they’re both disasters when you get to know them, but they’re disasters who love each other and care about this relationship

(Still, it is generally agreed that Thace probably made the best call by marrying a therapist who is affiliated with the college literally only because Ulaz is married to Thace, and because he sometimes gets clients referred to him by the mental health folks at student health services)

You know that old Arrested Development bit that goes, “Get me a vodka rocks.” / “Mother, it’s breakfast.” / “*sighs, rolls eyes* Fine, and a piece of toast” — yeah, no, Lotor and Honerva have done that exact bit before

One time when they were in undergrad, Ezor and Zethrid tried to make Lotor watch Arrested Development with them because they thought he’d probably find it funny and it might be like a therapeutic outlet for him. They ignored Acxa’s multiple warnings about how this was a terrible idea and it wasn’t going to work……

When Lotor made it through exactly four episodes before kinda breaking down and demanding to know what was so hilarious about a bunch of horrible, self-absorbed people screwing each other over and treating each other like garbage, these parents don’t even see their children as human beings how is this FUNNY, what the fuck is WRONG with the people who made this show, why does everyone love it so much, THIS IS HORRIBLE WHY ARE YOU EVEN MAKING HIM WATCH IT?

……Yeah, it was all Acxa could do not to tell them, “I told you so”

Mostly she didn’t because having known Lotor the longest means that she’s usually the one who has the easiest time of getting through to him in a constructive, helpful fashion when he’s being an even worse mess than usual, or having some kind of meltdown, or similar

Trying to discuss any of the show’s redeeming qualities with Lotor still will not end well. Because…… no, seriously. The Bluth-Fünkes and their misadventures hit waaaay too close to home for him, and remind him of Zarkon and Honerva most obviously (but also of all the extended family members who he pretty openly hates), and just

Don’t go there

Please for the love of God, I’m begging you: do not go there with Lotor, it’s a terrible idea for everyone

If you want to do any dysfunctional family comedies with him, your choices are Little Miss Sunshine and, “absolutely nothing, that is the only option, you can have Little Miss Sunshine or you can pick a genre other than dysfunctional family comedies”

Keith is going to be slightly confused when he gets to the Battle of the Bands on November 3rd and sees Acxa there. Because they have met before, while they were trying to switch between hiding and fighting back against some of the Conservative student groups that were antagonizing at Shay’s protest, and Keith hasn’t seen her around since then. Mostly, he hasn’t seen Acxa because she isn’t actually a student or in any way tied to the college; she just showed up for the protest because she agreed with Shay about not wanting that fuckhead anywhere near her city

Keith is not going to be confused by Zethrid, when he meets her, but basically everyone else is going to be confused by the fact that the two of them actually get along, because both of them have bad tempers and neither of them is really known for having stellar social skills

They’re going to talk to each other because Zethrid is all, “So how do you know my girlfriend and why did you two just have a sort of awkward moment of recognition” so Keith tells her, and aside from both of them thinking it was totally awesome how Acxa threw a brick at some skinhead and didn’t get caught, Keith is all, “*shrugs* You don’t have to apologize for assuming anything and getting defensive or whatever, I totally get wanting to protect the people you love and being willing to beat the shit out of someone to do it”

Zethrid: “*eyebrow arches because…… uh huh, Keith, you are 5’9” and you certainly look skinny even if you’re pretty strong, so you’ll excuse Zethrid for being skeptical* When have you ever beaten the shit out of anybody in your life, little man”

Keith: “……Do you want a romantically relevant example or my favorite example”

Zethrid: “………idk, let’s say both”

Keith: “Okay, well, the romantically relevant example was this one time in Chicago? Shiro, his old roommate, and I went out to a bar, and when we were all leaving, there were some skinheads going at these other guys. So, Shiro’s pretty drunk at the time and has even less impulse control than I did, and he runs right in to play big damn heroes, which ends up with him getting stabbed. Next thing I know, I’m pouncing this skinhead who’s like about Shiro’s height but built bigger than you, pummeling him because he stabbed Shiro. Apparently, I actually did some good damage before he shook me off, but I was kinda drunk too and got a concussion out of it, and my memory of it is a little fuzzy”

Zethrid: “Okay what about your favorite example”

Keith: “I had this foster one brother who liked to do shit like locking me in the cupboard under the stairs or locking me out of the house for several days so he could fuck his girlfriend. At the time, I also had a crush on this girl I went to school with. I mean, we were like 13 and neither of us had very many friends, so it’s not like we dated or anything, but she had a shitty home-life too and we got along. Anyway, I had her over one afternoon so we could work on a thing for our science class, and Bryce started being an asshole, so I kicked him in the nuts so hard that we had to go to the ER and get them pulled back out.”

Zethrid: “NICE. ……I like you. :)”

Keith: “……thank you? ……I think I like you, too.”

Lotor, probably: “Zethrid, nooooo, don’t like the street rat, please, I beg of you, it’s bad enough that Shiro likes him and Acxa thinks he’s okay, NOT YOU TOO ZETHRID, ZETHRID WHYYYYY”

Shiro and Acxa: “*facepalming forever because: 1. they know that they should encourage their Keith and Zethrid in making friends because they both do that so rarely, but… 2. for fuck’s sakes, why are you two bonding over a shared appreciation for violence, like? sdkffkhr, Shiro and Acxa are not outright OPPOSED to violence but can you two please find something else to bond over… and 3. ugh someone really has to go deal with Lotor before he has a full-blown temper tantrum and neither Shiro nor Acxa wants to be that person tonight, they really, really don’t*”

Coran does more active work with the students as the Assistant Dean of Student Life than Zarkon does as the full Dean of Student Life, but it’s an open secret that Zarkon doesn’t want this job — he’d rather just be the President of the University, but in lieu of that, Dean of Faculty is his ideal position — and that he makes Coran deal with more shit while inventing a bunch of bureaucratic reasons why he can’t do it himself.

Strictly speaking, Zarkon could probably get away with a lot more than he already does if he said something about his Chemistry professor wife being a high-functioning alcoholic while their son is sort of perpetually up at the edge of a meltdown cliff, but that would require him to:

1. acknowledge that Honerva has an actual problem instead of trusting that she totally has it under control because she’s a genius and he’s suspending good judgment because he loves her;

2. take Lotor’s problems seriously instead of dismissing him as a little more than a spoiled brat and an overly entitled pain in Zarkon’s ass;

and 3. care about his family’s actual health and overall well-being more than he cares about what the neighbors think and what the other people on campus think and, in general, about what kind of image his family projects to everybody else

—which means that this is basically never going to happen, since even if one of those things came to pass, the other two almost definitely wouldn’t unless Honerva was like, actually dying right here, right now, and Zarkon could not possibly find a way to escape dealing with the consequences of his bullshit choices and how much familial dysfunction that he’s allowed to fester by not taking any of it seriously, thinking that everyone could handle it fine, etc.

After a mix-up with his scholarships and grants that resulted in him losing his student housing, Keith did a lot of sleeping on campus couches while showering at the campus gym and he somehow managed to convince most everyone that he was totally fine…… until he relied on his old trick of sleeping in people’s cars, broke into Alfor’s, and got caught by Allura (who was his girlfriend at the time) and her fancy diplomat father.

The retort, “I mean, you should be glad to see me, I broke in while sleep-deprived and strung out on potentially heart attack-inducing amounts of coffee, so you clearly need a better security system on your Benz” did not go over well

Like, Alfor appreciated Keith’s attempt at humor, and the point about needing to get the security system checked on his car, and Keith’s sense of self-reliance…… but on the other hand, Allura’s boyfriend was all but passed out in Alfor’s backseat and tried to leave when Alfor offered him one of the guest rooms at their place uptown, so

That was kinda worrisome, yeah

Also not really the best way to meet your girlfriend’s father for the first time

Whoops

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omeliashipper · 7 years

Text

The solution to our problem Part 2

Special thanks to @cizavilation and @ailingnoor for betaing and for supporting me through the process of writing.

I started this 6 months ago, so I’m ignoring most of season 13 and just continuing the story I started.

This chapter is after this: https://omeliashipper.tumblr.com/post/153186227891/the-solution-to-our-problem-part-1 and before: https://omeliashipper.tumblr.com/post/154106278856/double-date

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"You're sure it was Tuesday and not Thursday?" Amelia asked as she paced up and down the living room. Owen was sitting on the couch trying to hear what the commentator on ESPN was saying. "Yes, Dana said that she would be dropping by on Tuesday at 3 pm" he answered patiently "Are you sure she said 3 pm?" Amelia asked nervously. Owen sighed and responded "Yes, I'm sure. Do you want to see the email again?" Amelia stopped pacing abruptly and reached for the remote to turn the TV off. Owen changed his position on the sofa so he could turn back to look at her. "I was watching that, you know?" He told her.

"Owen, we're going to fail this" Amelia exclaimed with wide eyes "Dana will walk through the house and see 100 ways the baby could kill itself in this dangerous house because we didn't babyproof it!" Amelia started pacing again, faster this time and Owen couldn't contain his chuckle. "I DON'T SEE HOW YOU CAN BE LAUGHING RIGHT NOW!" Amelia was raising her voice now. "This woman is going to decide if we are fit to be parents and you are sitting there, watching some bald man talk about sports while I'm losing my mind! How are you so calm? We haven’t even started moving things out of the study to make room for a child! What if she asks us where the nursery is going to be? We don’t have a freaking nursery!" Owen was openly laughing now as he walked toward her. He took her hands and said "Babe, we're going to be great parents. Everyone will see that. Dana will see we have a great home and that we love each other and that we will love the child they give us. Everything will be fine. We’ll show her our home and explain we will turn the study into the nursery. I think that she will understand that since we recently decided to adopt, we still don’t have the room ready." Amelia considered Owen’s words and tried to make an effort to calm down. Amelia's breathing was just going back to normal when the doorbell rang. Her eyes widened as she exclaimed "That's her!"

Dana was a kind woman in her late 50's with a lot of experience in the system. She was sweet and had a soothing voice. It was clear that she cared deeply for the children and wanted them to have good homes. She reassured Amelia when it became obvious that she was speaking very fast because of her nerves. Owen did most of the talking during the tour of their home because Amelia was worried that between her nerves and her natural inability to filter herself, she might ruin their chances of getting a child. When they made their way to the study, Amelia explained “This will be the child’s room! I know it doesn’t look anything like it yet but it will soon!” Owen chuckled and continued “Yes, we will move everything to storage and buy the appropriate furniture and decorate it for them” Dana looked at the space and asked “Are you open to adopt sibling groups?” Owen and Amelia looked at each other “Yes, we also have the guest room that can be turned into a room for them” Owen responded as Amelia nodded. As they made their way to the living room, Amelia commented “I know nothing has been babyproofed but it is on our to-do list”. Dana chuckled “I’m glad to see your dedication, Dr. Shepherd, but I wasn’t expecting your house to be babyproofed yet”

After the tour, they sat in the living room and answered questions about their work and family life. Owen took Amelia's hand and squeezed it reassuringly, which made her smile even though the amount of notes Dana was taking made her nervous.

“Thank you for the tour. You have a lovely home. Now I must ask you a series of questions to make sure you are applying to adopt for the right reasons and make sure the child would be going to a stable home environment. Why did you decide to apply for adoption?” Dana inquired. Owen looked at Amelia as she answered “We both have wanted to form a family for years, both separately and as a couple. After I lost a son shortly after his birth, I realized I cannot do that again, but we have so much love to give and have always wanted to be parents, so when presented with the choice between surrogacy and adoption, we both felt in our hearts that adoption was the best option for us” Dana wrote down some of her answer on her clipboard and asked “Do you feel like one of you feels more strongly about adopting?” Owen and Amelia held hands and answered “No” at the same time. “Very well. Who suggested adoption first?” Dana asked. Owen sat up straighter and responded “I did. I had considered adopting a boy a few years ago. His parents were patients at the hospital when I was chief of surgery. We bonded and after his mother passed away and it seemed like his father wasn’t going to make it, I thought about it, but his father recovered and they were transferred to another hospital”

Dana finished writing down his answer and questioned “I see, now I will ask you about your families, starting with you, Dr. Hunt” Owen cleared his throat before responding "My mother, Evelyn Hunt, is retired army nurse who lives 5 miles away from the hospital we work at and where the daycare is, so in case the children need to someone to pick them up and we're both in surgeries," Amelia nodded along as Owen spoke "she's close by and can help. My father, was also part of the army but passed away when I was 10." Dana continued taking notes " A military family, I see" Owen puffed up his chest in pride "Yes, ma'am. I had a sister, Megan, but she went M.I.A. a little over 9 years ago." Owen said looking at his hands. "M.I.A.? She's no longer part of your life?" Dana asked. Amelia took Owen's hand and squeezed it for support as she answered "She went missing in action while on her way to provide medical service in combat" Dana put down her pen and looked at Owen "I'm sorry. People misuse MIA all the time, I did not realize you really meant it" Owen lifted his hand to stop her and said "Don't worry, I understand"

"And there's also John Finch. He's Evelyn's boyfriend. He lives with her, He can also help." Owen turned to look at Amelia, surprised she had mentioned John. Amelia extended her arm toward Dana and continues "Dana needs to know about John in case the children have a sleep over at your mom's or have to spend the day there and he's around." Dana looked up from her clipboard at Owen "She's right, Dr. Hunt. If Mr. Finch is going to be part of the children's life, it is important I know about him, and since he lives with your mother and she is part of your support system, I think it's safe to assume he will" Owen sat back in the sofa and continued “John served in the Navy, but now he’s a firefighter, so sometimes he also has weird hours like we do, so it is a possibility that he might be the one to pick up the children if need arises” “Uh-huh” Dana finished writing and looked at Amelia “Can I ask about your family now, Dr. Shepherd?” Amelia swallowed hard and rubbed her hands up and down her thighs in nervous energy “My family” she chuckled “Well, I’m the youngest of 5 siblings. My mother, my 3 sisters and their families live back east. I have 11 nieces and 6 nephews. My father passed away when I was 5. My mother a former Navy nurse raised us on her own. My brother passed away almost 2 years ago as a result of a car accident but we’re close to Meredith, who was his wife and their son and daughters as well as her sister, Margaret Pierce. They could also be part of our support system, in case they are needed. We have a village really!” Dana chuckled as she took notes of Amelia’s answer.

She looked up from her notes and said “Now I must ask you about childhoods” Amelia looked at Owen in slight panic. Owen took Amelia’s hand and nodded reassuringly at her. Amelia took a deep breath and looked at Dana. “My father was working the cash register at the convenience store when it was robbed. They took the money and wanted his watch, which had been a gift from my mom, too. He refused and they shot him. My brother and I were in the back of the store. I was five.” Amelia paused and looked at her hands which she was now clasping and unclasping on her lap. “It’s safe to say that affected me and I had a bit of a wild childhood. I’m sure that at some point you will have to ask about substance abuse, so I might a well let you know now. I became addicted to alcohol and oxycodone, but I am sober now and I attend meetings regularly.” Amelia turned to look ruefully at Owen, convinced she had just ruined their shot at adoption. Dana looked at her and said “Addictions is something we definitely bear in mind when considering a couple to become parents, but whether or not it will become a deal breaker, comes to the biological parents. They make the final decision.”

Owen and Amelia continued answering questions about their past and families until Dana announced that she had the information she required to build them a file. After walking Dana to the door and thanking her for her visit, they collapsed on the couch in relief. "I think that went well" Owen said. Amelia just looked at him warily in response “I think we answered like 100 questions” she said. “Now we wait” Owen said as he reached to take Amelia into his arms “This isn’t our only option, Amelia. If they decide to pass us up, we can always try surrogacy. We’ll find a way.”

#amelia shepherd #Owen Hunt #owen and amelia #omelia #omelia fanfiction #omelia fics #omelia ff #omeliafics #Amen #amen ff #amenfics #amen fanfiction #amen fics #greys anatomy

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